| game,character,aliases,num_appearances,total_scenes,scene_ids,example_0,example_1,example_2,example_3,example_4,valid | |
| cat,Lick Claire,"['Lick Claire', 'claire', 'Claire']",3140,10160,"01_newhome_87,01_newhome_91,01_newhome_98,01_newhome_121,01_newhome_161,01_newhome_200,01_newhome_260,01_newhome_306,01_newhome_125,01_newhome_129,01_newhome_150,01_newhome_168,01_newhome_175,01_newhome_186,01_newhome_210,01_newhome_220,01_newhome_237,01_newhome_250,01_newhome_277,01_newhome_286,01_newhome_294,01_newhome_316,01_newhome_335,01_newhome_343,01_newhome_355,01_newhome_134,01_newhome_376,01_newhome_382,01_newhome_393,01_newhome_402,01_newhome_418,01_newhome_450,01_newhome_466,01_newhome_432,01_newhome_442,01_newhome_473,01_newhome_486,01_newhome_499,01_newhome_516,01_newhome_585,01_newhome_630,01_newhome_604,01_newhome_615,01_newhome_639,01_newhome_646,01_newhome_675,01_newhome_686,01_newhome_692,01_newhome_652,01_newhome_658,01_newhome_666,01_newhome_703,01_newhome_710,01_newhome_716,01_newhome_721,01_newhome_729,01_newhome_751,01_newhome_941,01_newhome_946,01_newhome_953,01_newhome_978,01_newhome_992,01_newhome_999,01_newhome_1007,01_newhome_1015,01_newhome_1056,01_newhome_1079,01_newhome_1060,01_newhome_1099,01_newhome_1108,01_newhome_1069,01_newhome_1087,01_newhome_1096,01_newhome_1100,01_newhome_1105,01_newhome_1114,01_newhome_1136,01_newhome_1122,01_newhome_1128,01_newhome_1148,01_newhome_1152,01_newhome_1158,01_newhome_1165,01_newhome_1187,01_newhome_1210,01_newhome_1260,01_newhome_1172,01_newhome_1178,01_newhome_1182,01_newhome_1200,01_newhome_1205,01_newhome_1220,01_newhome_1228,01_newhome_1272,01_newhome_1281,01_newhome_1290,01_newhome_1318,01_newhome_1238,01_newhome_1242,01_newhome_1246,01_newhome_1250,01_newhome_1301,01_newhome_1324,01_newhome_1332,01_newhome_1338,01_newhome_1361,01_newhome_1367,01_newhome_1412,01_newhome_1369,01_newhome_1382,01_newhome_1385,01_newhome_1388,01_newhome_1391,01_newhome_1398,01_newhome_1403,01_newhome_1406,01_newhome_1409,01_newhome_1416,01_newhome_1421,01_newhome_1426,01_newhome_1430,01_newhome_1441,01_newhome_1459,01_newhome_1479,01_newhome_1444,01_newhome_1447,01_newhome_1452,01_newhome_1455,01_newhome_1462,01_newhome_1466,01_newhome_1470,01_newhome_1474,01_newhome_1481,01_newhome_1492,01_newhome_1495,01_newhome_1499,01_newhome_1510,01_newhome_1516,01_newhome_1528,01_newhome_1530,01_newhome_1823,01_newhome_1843,01_newhome_2272,01_newhome_2279,01_newhome_2280,01_newhome_2303,01_newhome_2304,01_newhome_2308,01_newhome_2313,01_newhome_2317,01_newhome_2322,01_newhome_2327,01_newhome_2342,01_newhome_2579,01_newhome_2588,01_newhome_2591,01_newhome_2594,01_newhome_2602,01_newhome_2609,02_bene_41,01_newhome_2626,01_newhome_2633,02_bene_50,02_bene_98,02_bene_52,02_bene_67,02_bene_81,02_bene_101,02_bene_106,01_newhome_2655,01_newhome_2687,02_bene_150,02_bene_153,02_bene_56,02_bene_71,02_bene_90,01_newhome_2658,01_newhome_2666,01_newhome_2691,01_newhome_2698,02_bene_158,02_bene_112,01_newhome_2731,02_bene_173,02_bene_314,02_bene_387,01_newhome_2707,01_newhome_2794,02_bene_287,02_bene_329,01_newhome_2737,02_bene_177,02_bene_184,02_bene_189,02_bene_196,02_bene_207,02_bene_214,02_bene_227,02_bene_234,02_bene_242,02_bene_250,02_bene_259,02_bene_265,02_bene_274,02_bene_281,02_bene_288,02_bene_296,02_bene_302,02_bene_309,02_bene_319,02_bene_324,02_bene_334,02_bene_345,02_bene_356,02_bene_362,02_bene_372,02_bene_378,02_bene_396,02_bene_481,02_bene_406,02_bene_419,02_bene_488,01_newhome_2779,02_bene_407,02_bene_414,02_bene_421,02_bene_430,02_bene_438,02_bene_445,02_bene_452,02_bene_459,02_bene_498,02_bene_502,02_bene_507,02_bene_517,02_bene_522,02_bene_528,02_bene_534,02_bene_540,02_bene_553,01_newhome_2755,02_bene_564,02_bene_580,02_bene_587,02_bene_603,02_bene_613,02_bene_650,02_bene_654,02_bene_660,02_bene_664,02_bene_668,02_bene_672,02_bene_689,02_bene_882,02_bene_887,02_bene_862,02_bene_990,02_bene_1454,02_bene_1636,02_bene_1739,02_bene_1763,02_bene_1807,02_bene_1863,02_bene_1906,02_bene_1767,02_bene_1771,02_bene_1813,02_bene_1869,02_bene_1877,02_bene_1889,02_bene_1911,02_bene_1925,02_bene_1777,02_bene_1785,02_bene_1920,02_bene_1975,02_bene_1980,02_bene_1994,02_bene_2006,02_bene_1857,02_bene_1941,02_bene_1984,02_bene_2011,02_bene_2033,02_bene_2062,02_bene_1797,02_bene_1833,02_bene_1839,02_bene_1847,02_bene_1943,02_bene_2016,02_bene_2021,02_bene_2026,02_bene_2040,02_bene_2058,02_bene_2093,02_bene_2100,02_bene_1949,02_bene_2126,02_bene_2083,02_bene_2136,02_bene_2114,02_bene_2164,02_bene_2177,03_maddox_34,03_maddox_41,03_maddox_46,03_maddox_148,03_maddox_257,03_maddox_284,03_maddox_429,03_maddox_459,03_maddox_468,03_maddox_484,03_maddox_507,03_maddox_522,03_maddox_563,03_maddox_567,03_maddox_632,03_maddox_2358,03_maddox_591,03_maddox_595,03_maddox_605,03_maddox_615,03_maddox_619,03_maddox_642,03_maddox_692,03_maddox_711,03_maddox_722,03_maddox_751,03_maddox_695,03_maddox_703,03_maddox_713,03_maddox_718,03_maddox_723,03_maddox_753,03_maddox_760,03_maddox_737,03_maddox_743,03_maddox_850,03_maddox_786,03_maddox_792,03_maddox_799,03_maddox_819,03_maddox_831,03_maddox_843,03_maddox_876,03_maddox_884,03_maddox_855,03_maddox_806,03_maddox_2205,03_maddo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let out a plaintive mew as Andre makes for the door. There's a second voice then—the woman named Claire, whose pleasant, alto tones you recognize from when you were picked out at the cat shelter and stuffed in this","box. | |
| ""Thanks, honey,"" she says. ""My hands were full."" | |
| You hear rustling sounds, perhaps plastic bags. Car keys clatter on wood. The low whining tone of their small child starts but is cut off when Claire says, ""Andre! For heaven's sake!"" | |
| The thud of running feet ends when Claire makes it to your cardboard confinement. Her hands scrabble at the slots and tabs above you. | |
| ""What?"" Andre protests. ""You said you wanted me to wait!"" | |
| ""Only if I managed to keep up with you in traffic! Can't you tell the poor thing's in distress?"" | |
| ""I…well…I…,"" Andre stammers.","Box flaps are twisted and pulled. Then, right above you, there is light—a lamp with five bulbs in fluted casings. It's quite fancy-looking. | |
| ""Hey there, puss,"" Claire says, moving back. From here you only see her head: cropped hair, a heart-shaped face. | |
| You poke your head out farther from your biodegradable cage to see an expanse of cream carpet. You blink. Even the sofas are impressive, with curling arms just right for scratching and walnut inserts that match the coffee table. There's a flat-screen telly built into shelves to the right, and next to it is a fully working fireplace whose mantelpiece boasts handfuls of deliciously tippable trinkets. | |
| Claire holds out a hand toward you as Andre starts up his noodling again. You consider your first move in this brand-new home. You can:","Make a leap for the mantelpiece. I don't like being touched by strangers. | |
| You perform an impressive jump, though its main effect is making Moon, the child, wail. She has a serious set of lungs for a four-year-old, and appears to be frightened by anything sudden. Between her and Andre, you don't think you'll have much domestic quiet. Still, they do seem to care what you're up to. As you pick your way carefully across framed pictures and porcelain ornaments, Andre stops playing his guitar to tend to Moon, and Claire moves in quickly to grab you.","Lean out toward Claire and nuzzle her arm as thanks for opening the box. | |
| Claire's hands are smooth, and she smells of musky perfume. As she massages your head, you nuzzle the fabric of her suit, powerhouse black with a dark blue trim. The kid stares at you with a mute blend of fear and fascination. Claire is clearly knowledgable about how cats like to be stroked, and you give her a purr to reinforce her good behavior. | |
| ""Check it out, Moon, honey,"" Andre says to the child. ""I think Mum's the favorite so far."" Andre looks a little guilty, and follows this up with ""I'm sorry for leaving you in the box, puss."" | |
| He leaves off his riffing to pet you too, looking genuinely apologetic.", | |
| cat,Andre Lassen,"['Andre Lassen', 'andre', 'Lassen', 'Dre', 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dark presses inward. You cannot stretch or get comfortable. As with any cat, being shut inside boxes is high on your list of things to avoid, but you didn't get much choice. The shuddering sounds of a car engine subside, and you know you are being carried somewhere indoors. | |
| ""Good puss. Nearly there,"" comes a cheerful male voice. ""I'm Andre, by the way, and this is your new place."" | |
| Your box is put down. Stable, solid ground at last. From experience, you expect to be let out now, and you'd probably pace back and forth if there were room. | |
| ""The others are right behind us, puss,"" Andre continues, now fidgeting about in the room. ""Hang in there."" You hear a humming, clicking sound. After that, some loud notes that start to form a tune. A guitar. This Andre guy has sparked up an amplifier and is hacking away at some guitar solo when he should be letting you out. The tune part is barely discernible, but what he lacks in talent, he's trying to make up for in volume. Why the hell hasn't he opened this damn thing? From inside your box, how will you communicate that your release is, by now, totally and utterly necessary?","Start yowling with as much dramaticism as possible. | |
| Andre's noodling is genuinely loud, and you can't believe how long it takes him to hear your distress between notes. He stops playing. There's the sound of feet padding toward you over carpet—just before a doorbell rings.","Get his attention via smell. If I make [i]him[/i] uncomfortable too, he'll do something. | |
| You hear the word ""Jesus!"" followed by the almost immediate cessation of music. | |
| ""I'm sorry, little buddy. I'll grab some paper towels and get you out of there."" Andre's footsteps recede, and you hear the doorbell ring.","Tip the box over, then go still and silent so he'll worry I'm dead. | |
| It's quite a feat to tip over a box you're inside of. The music continues like a B-grade soundtrack to your predicament as you repeat your attempts. When you finally manage it, Andre responds like a shot. | |
| ""God. I'm sorry, little buddy. Let's get you out of there."" As he finishes his sentence, the doorbell rings.","What's outside of boxes can be worse than being in them. I wait, scared and quiet. | |
| The music doesn't carry on as long as it might have. It might be that your silence unnerves Andre. It might also be he's heard another car pull up outside. | |
| ""Hey, little buddy, you OK in there?"" The kindness in his voice depletes your fear of what's outside. | |
| The doorbell rings, and you peer up at the folds of cardboard overhead, waiting.", | |
| cat,Infamous Music Factory CEO Helmut Smythe,"['Infamous Music Factory CEO Helmut Smythe', 'Music Factory CEO Helmut Smythe', 'Helmut', 'helmut', 'Helmut Smythe']",882,10160,"01_newhome_751,01_newhome_784,01_newhome_789,01_newhome_879,01_newhome_976,01_newhome_2317,02_bene_802,02_bene_871,02_bene_818,02_bene_820,02_bene_1459,02_bene_1469,02_bene_1502,02_bene_1507,02_bene_1515,02_bene_1528,02_bene_1536,02_bene_1550,02_bene_1570,02_bene_1594,02_bene_1636,02_bene_1665,02_bene_1571,02_bene_1586,02_bene_1600,02_bene_1638,02_bene_1650,02_bene_1658,02_bene_1668,02_bene_1680,02_bene_1694,02_bene_1712,02_bene_1722,02_bene_1739,02_bene_1725,02_bene_1728,02_bene_1763,02_bene_1863,02_bene_1906,02_bene_1767,02_bene_1813,02_bene_1869,02_bene_1877,02_bene_1889,02_bene_1911,02_bene_1925,02_bene_1611,02_bene_1626,02_bene_1973,02_bene_1777,02_bene_1785,02_bene_1920,02_bene_1975,02_bene_1994,02_bene_2006,02_bene_1857,02_bene_1984,02_bene_2062,02_bene_1797,02_bene_1833,02_bene_1839,02_bene_1847,02_bene_2058,02_bene_2067,02_bene_2126,02_bene_2153,02_bene_2164,03_maddox_210,03_maddox_453,03_maddox_2124,03_maddox_2127,03_maddox_2149,03_maddox_2153,03_maddox_2208,03_maddox_2244,03_maddox_2289,03_maddox_2358,03_maddox_2160,03_maddox_2291,03_maddox_2322,03_maddox_2215,03_maddox_2255,03_maddox_2331,03_maddox_2381,03_maddox_2223,03_maddox_2386,03_maddox_2391,03_maddox_2303,03_maddox_2345,03_maddox_2431,03_maddox_2550,03_maddox_2276,03_maddox_2443,03_maddox_2464,03_maddox_2478,03_maddox_2573,03_maddox_2599,03_maddox_2605,03_maddox_2181,03_maddox_2467,03_maddox_2558,03_maddox_2565,03_maddox_2577,03_maddox_2582,03_maddox_2237,03_maddox_2282,03_maddox_2447,03_maddox_2459,03_maddox_2500,03_maddox_2240,03_maddox_2316,03_maddox_2676,03_maddox_2693,03_maddox_2703,03_maddox_2715,03_maddox_2726,03_maddox_2743,03_maddox_2482,03_maddox_2488,03_maddox_2682,03_maddox_2753,03_maddox_2734,03_maddox_2747,03_maddox_2195,03_maddox_2202,03_maddox_2205,03_maddox_2774,03_maddox_2784,03_maddox_2798,03_maddox_2839,03_maddox_2792,03_maddox_2800,03_maddox_2843,03_maddox_1078,03_maddox_2896,03_maddox_2831,03_maddox_2899,03_maddox_3026,03_maddox_2920,03_maddox_2928,03_maddox_2988,03_maddox_3001,03_maddox_2908,03_maddox_2955,03_maddox_3045,03_maddox_2963,03_maddox_2969,03_maddox_2974,03_maddox_2980,03_maddox_3245,03_maddox_3256,03_maddox_3260,03_maddox_3398,03_maddox_3855,03_maddox_3887,03_maddox_3867,03_maddox_3879,03_maddox_3910,03_maddox_3924,03_maddox_3939,04_familytension_463,04_familytension_686,04_familytension_1183,04_familytension_1225,04_familytension_1230,04_familytension_1247,04_familytension_1113,04_familytension_1129,04_familytension_1283,04_familytension_1309,04_familytension_3171,04_familytension_3179,04_familytension_3182,04_familytension_3190,04_familytension_3193,04_familytension_3200,04_familytension_3203,04_familytension_3249,04_familytension_3267,04_familytension_3298,04_familytension_3224,04_familytension_3241,04_familytension_3257,04_familytension_3343,04_familytension_3347,04_familytension_3253,04_familytension_3871,04_familytension_3874,04_familytension_3318,04_familytension_3338,04_familytension_3357,04_familytension_3890,04_familytension_3390,04_familytension_3431,04_familytension_3444,04_familytension_3462,04_familytension_4019,04_familytension_4041,04_familytension_3320,04_familytension_3897,04_familytension_3948,04_familytension_3434,04_familytension_3440,04_familytension_3448,04_familytension_3456,04_familytension_3464,04_familytension_3473,04_familytension_3639,04_familytension_3990,04_familytension_4005,04_familytension_4014,04_familytension_4022,04_familytension_4034,04_familytension_4044,04_familytension_4058,04_familytension_3901,04_familytension_3911,04_familytension_3925,04_familytension_3938,04_familytension_3950,04_familytension_3968,04_familytension_3643,04_familytension_4267,04_familytension_4397,04_familytension_4418,04_familytension_4448,04_familytension_4462,04_familytension_4032,04_familytension_4051,04_familytension_4269,04_familytension_4272,04_familytension_3652,04_familytension_3657,04_familytension_3667,04_familytension_3674,04_familytension_4419,04_familytension_4431,04_familytension_4452,04_familytension_4458,04_familytension_4464,04_familytension_4471,04_familytension_4262,04_familytension_4284,04_familytension_3681,04_familytension_3700,04_familytension_4435,04_familytension_4441,04_familytension_4476,04_familytension_4494,04_familytension_4359,04_familytension_4487,04_familytension_4292,04_familytension_4324,04_familytension_4334,04_familytension_4343,04_familytension_4349,04_familytension_4371,04_familytension_1841,04_familytension_4366,04_familytension_4375,04_familytension_4380,04_familytension_4299,04_familytension_4302,04_familytension_4310,04_familytension_5884,04_familytension_6032,04_familytension_4305,04_familytension_4314,04_familytension_5631,04_familytension_5638,04_familytension_5642,04_familytension_5646,05_bigdecision_1545,05_bigdecision_1500,05_bigdecision_1512,06_dinner_331,06_dinner_331,06_dinner_382,06_dinner_386,06_dinner_534,06_dinner_537,06_dinner_553,06_dinner_569,06_dinner_581,06_dinner_470,06_dinner_493,06_dinner_523,06_dinner_541,06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awake to the sound of Andre's voice and distant laughter filtering in from outdoors. | |
| ""Hey, sleepyhead,"" Andre says to Claire, perching on the curled arm of the couch. ""Helmut's got some of his record-company buddies over again. I bet you're glad you got a few hours' sleep."" | |
| Claire groans and stretches her arms toward the ceiling. You eye them both with interest. Something or someone smells of food. | |
| ""Moon is asking for you,"" Andre continues. ""Apparently I don't read [i]Hairy Maclary[/i] right."" | |
| Claire rises from the couch, kissing Andre on the cheek and muttering curses on the neighbor called Helmut. The details are lost on you because you're distracted by your stomach—the aroma of something cooked and meaty has set it grumbling. You arch your back and yawn before investigating where the source might be, starting with Andre. | |
| ""Yep, time for us to hang, Stinky,"" says Andre. He smiles as you circle him, sniffing him closely. | |
| ""Sorry, chicken curry again for dinner!"" he calls after Claire, as she blearily heads for the door. | |
| ""Good thing I like chicken curry,"" she calls behind her. | |
| The question is, do you?","Your stomach growls as Andre wanders off, grabbing his guitar and standing at the window. You follow at his heels, meowing. ""Careful, Stinky,"" he says. ""I just about stepped on you."" | |
| Which was the whole idea. Cat fact number 57: When humans step on you, they feel guilty and give you stuff. For example, food—or massages. You stare up expectantly as Andre parts the net curtains to stare into his neighbor Helmut's garden. | |
| You follow his gaze across a lawn and to a fence. Beyond it, dense shrubs have been forced into animal shapes, then shot through with sparkly outdoor lights. There is a marble-tiled patio whose border is hemmed in by dahlias. On the patio itself, shiny-looking people are gathered in circles, talking and clutching wineglasses. They nod and gesticulate a lot, like whatever they're saying is important. The furrows in Andre's brow say he thinks this is quite serious. | |
| ""That guy there, Stinky, that's Jose James,"" he says gravely, as if the name meant anything to felines. ""He's Music Factory A and R."" He squints again through the glass. ""And that woman in blue is Saima Osman, head of marketing. That is a powerhouse gathering over there.""","He lets the curtain fall back and goes over to his amp to turn it up to full volume. He winks at you, like you're party to some private, hatching plan. He goes back to the window to open it a little. Your stomach growls as you realize that wonderful smell from before happens to be coming from this Helmut guy's patio. Those people are gathered around a barbecue. | |
| ""So, Stinky,"" Andre whispers, ""let's see if we can get their attention."" | |
| Andre, it seems, has not registered your hunger. Nor is he noticing your stomach's loud insistence. It actually looks like he's going to play that guitar again instead of feeding you. | |
| ""What do you say, Stinky? A song, and then we get some food?""","Purr to encourage the new choice. It can't be worse, can it? | |
| ""Good call, Stinky,"" says Andre. ""Just a sec."" He stands and turns the amp around to face the window. The chatter of Helmut's guests continues outside.","Some woman in a striped trouser suit is smiling and waving her wineglass in your direction, shouting over her shoulder to another partygoer as her smile becomes a laugh. The other party guest nods, and they move off closer to Helmut's massive house. | |
| Andre's head sways as the solo peaks. He's right in the zone now. Outside, a dark-haired man comes up to the edge of the fence to shout something, which neither of you stand a chance of hearing. When he goes back to join the crowd, he throws one arm up in the air. After that, the people start to dance, shaking weirdly as their drinks slosh and their hair somehow defies the force of movement. You turn toward Andre, hoping he'll stop and give you food, now that he's clearly succeeded in his goal of getting attention.", | |
| cat,Shock Moon,"['Moon', 'Shock Moon']",754,10160,"01_newhome_121,01_newhome_161,01_newhome_200,01_newhome_260,01_newhome_306,01_newhome_125,01_newhome_150,01_newhome_168,01_newhome_175,01_newhome_186,01_newhome_210,01_newhome_220,01_newhome_237,01_newhome_250,01_newhome_277,01_newhome_286,01_newhome_294,01_newhome_335,01_newhome_349,01_newhome_134,01_newhome_376,01_newhome_382,01_newhome_393,01_newhome_402,01_newhome_412,01_newhome_418,01_newhome_450,01_newhome_466,01_newhome_442,01_newhome_499,01_newhome_516,01_newhome_525,01_newhome_585,01_newhome_590,01_newhome_630,01_newhome_593,01_newhome_604,01_newhome_615,01_newhome_639,01_newhome_646,01_newhome_675,01_newhome_686,01_newhome_652,01_newhome_658,01_newhome_666,01_newhome_624,01_newhome_703,01_newhome_751,01_newhome_978,01_newhome_2314,01_newhome_2317,01_newhome_2322,01_newhome_2349,01_newhome_2626,01_newhome_2633,02_bene_334,02_bene_345,02_bene_650,02_bene_689,02_bene_882,02_bene_887,02_bene_807,02_bene_859,02_bene_865,02_bene_818,02_bene_1067,02_bene_1365,02_bene_1281,02_bene_1301,02_bene_1415,02_bene_1528,02_bene_1536,02_bene_1550,02_bene_1570,02_bene_1636,02_bene_1665,02_bene_1708,02_bene_1571,02_bene_1586,02_bene_1600,02_bene_1638,02_bene_1650,02_bene_1658,02_bene_1680,02_bene_1694,02_bene_1739,02_bene_1725,02_bene_1728,02_bene_1863,02_bene_1869,02_bene_1877,02_bene_1626,02_bene_2006,02_bene_2087,02_bene_2093,02_bene_2100,02_bene_1949,02_bene_2177,03_maddox_50,03_maddox_95,03_maddox_2119,03_maddox_589,03_maddox_2244,03_maddox_2358,03_maddox_2248,03_maddox_2291,03_maddox_2322,03_maddox_642,03_maddox_2215,03_maddox_2255,03_maddox_2331,03_maddox_2381,03_maddox_2223,03_maddox_2386,03_maddox_2345,03_maddox_2431,03_maddox_2270,03_maddox_2443,03_maddox_2464,03_maddox_2478,03_maddox_2599,03_maddox_2605,03_maddox_2181,03_maddox_2310,03_maddox_2471,03_maddox_2565,03_maddox_2582,03_maddox_2282,03_maddox_2447,03_maddox_2500,03_maddox_2240,03_maddox_2316,03_maddox_2676,03_maddox_2693,03_maddox_2703,03_maddox_2715,03_maddox_2726,03_maddox_2743,03_maddox_2482,03_maddox_2488,03_maddox_2493,03_maddox_2747,03_maddox_2758,03_maddox_2762,03_maddox_2767,03_maddox_2205,03_maddox_2774,03_maddox_2784,03_maddox_2839,03_maddox_2781,03_maddox_2787,03_maddox_2792,03_maddox_2800,03_maddox_2805,03_maddox_2896,03_maddox_2814,03_maddox_2817,03_maddox_2831,03_maddox_2916,03_maddox_3026,03_maddox_2928,03_maddox_2952,03_maddox_2988,03_maddox_3001,03_maddox_3042,03_maddox_2821,03_maddox_2955,03_maddox_3045,03_maddox_2963,03_maddox_2969,03_maddox_2974,03_maddox_3093,03_maddox_3100,03_maddox_1298,03_maddox_3133,03_maddox_3225,03_maddox_3296,03_maddox_3237,03_maddox_3276,03_maddox_3281,03_maddox_3290,03_maddox_3302,03_maddox_3245,03_maddox_3256,03_maddox_3260,03_maddox_3311,03_maddox_3326,03_maddox_3345,03_maddox_3340,03_maddox_3369,03_maddox_3379,03_maddox_3336,03_maddox_3388,03_maddox_3398,03_maddox_3433,03_maddox_3474,03_maddox_3481,03_maddox_3485,03_maddox_3500,03_maddox_3513,03_maddox_3525,03_maddox_3494,03_maddox_3502,03_maddox_3510,03_maddox_3578,03_maddox_3610,03_maddox_3622,03_maddox_3628,03_maddox_3696,03_maddox_3722,03_maddox_3659,03_maddox_3691,03_maddox_3717,03_maddox_3726,03_maddox_3732,03_maddox_3701,03_maddox_3760,03_maddox_3785,03_maddox_3855,03_maddox_3887,03_maddox_3916,03_maddox_3933,04_familytension_453,04_familytension_805,04_familytension_881,04_familytension_883,04_familytension_1016,04_familytension_1038,04_familytension_1091,04_familytension_1189,04_familytension_1094,04_familytension_3491,04_familytension_3570,04_familytension_3819,04_familytension_3715,04_familytension_5293,04_familytension_5298,04_familytension_3719,04_familytension_3726,04_familytension_5696,04_familytension_5733,04_familytension_4842,04_familytension_4874,04_familytension_6484,04_familytension_5311,04_familytension_3516,04_familytension_6502,04_familytension_5702,04_familytension_5711,04_familytension_5721,04_familytension_4989,04_familytension_6146,04_familytension_5315,04_familytension_5321,04_familytension_5325,04_familytension_5329,04_familytension_6543,04_familytension_5747,04_familytension_6324,04_familytension_5333,04_familytension_5750,04_familytension_6655,04_familytension_6330,04_familytension_4242,04_familytension_6161,04_familytension_6284,04_familytension_6294,04_familytension_5776,04_familytension_5884,04_familytension_6081,04_familytension_6178,04_familytension_6170,04_familytension_5897,04_familytension_5908,04_familytension_5911,04_familytension_6128,04_familytension_6182,04_familytension_6188,04_familytension_5796,04_familytension_5955,04_familytension_5961,04_familytension_5967,04_familytension_5976,04_familytension_5985,04_familytension_5990,04_familytension_5999,04_familytension_6007,04_familytension_6017,04_familytension_6022,04_familytension_6027,04_familytension_6091,04_familytension_6104,04_familytension_6114,04_familytension_6120,04_familytension_6041,04_familytension_5804,04_familytension_5936,04_familytension_6077,04_familytension_6096,04_familytension_6215,04_familytension_6388,04_familytens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a leap for the mantelpiece. I don't like being touched by strangers. | |
| You perform an impressive jump, though its main effect is making Moon, the child, wail. She has a serious set of lungs for a four-year-old, and appears to be frightened by anything sudden. Between her and Andre, you don't think you'll have much domestic quiet. Still, they do seem to care what you're up to. As you pick your way carefully across framed pictures and porcelain ornaments, Andre stops playing his guitar to tend to Moon, and Claire moves in quickly to grab you.","Lean out toward Claire and nuzzle her arm as thanks for opening the box. | |
| Claire's hands are smooth, and she smells of musky perfume. As she massages your head, you nuzzle the fabric of her suit, powerhouse black with a dark blue trim. The kid stares at you with a mute blend of fear and fascination. Claire is clearly knowledgable about how cats like to be stroked, and you give her a purr to reinforce her good behavior. | |
| ""Check it out, Moon, honey,"" Andre says to the child. ""I think Mum's the favorite so far."" Andre looks a little guilty, and follows this up with ""I'm sorry for leaving you in the box, puss."" | |
| He leaves off his riffing to pet you too, looking genuinely apologetic.","Launch immediate revenge on Andre by seeing if his guitar is killable. | |
| You explode from the confines of the cardboard. One learns something new every day, even if it's by being ferocious; when your teeth meet with hard wood and metal, you make a mental note that guitars cannot be killed. At least, not by the methods you just attempted. Andre pulls you off gently, looking more deflated than annoyed. | |
| ""Well, that was to be expected,"" Claire says wryly, and you get the distinct impression she likes his playing about as much as you do. The kid hasn't taken her eyes off you since you emerged from the box. Your alley-cat tactics have sent her hiding behind a chair. | |
| ""Aw, Moon, sweetie,"" says Andre. ""The pussycat is scared, just like you. It had a long journey."" He leans his guitar against an armchair and heads over to comfort her. | |
| With the guitar now unguarded, you could try another tactic.","Give Andre and his guitar some nuzzles to show him you like music, too…most of the time. | |
| Claire raises an eyebrow as you pick your way out of your carton and head for Andre. You rub yourself against his trouser leg and do your best to nuzzle his guitar. It's up higher than you, so this involves stretching to brush it with the top of your head. | |
| ""Is that a headbutt, or have you found yourself a fan?"" | |
| ""Claire, my love, sometimes talent transcends species,"" Andre says with a wink, and launches into a riff of his own invention. | |
| The kid hasn't taken her eyes off you since you emerged from the box. She starts to smile as her dad muddles on on his guitar. | |
| ""The pussycat likes Daddy's guitar, too!"" She throws a hand over her mouth and jiggles in her seat with excitement. | |
| ""Clearly a cat with great taste,"" Andre says, smiling. ""Why don't you come over and say hello, Moon, sweetie?"" | |
| The kid called Moon smiles nervously and heads toward you with one hand outstretched. When she reaches you, she turns her head away, shutting her eyes with her hand still held out.","Show my contempt for humans by looking them in the eye, then turning and leaving the room. | |
| The family watches as you pick your way carefully out through the twisted cardboard flaps. You stand there on the carpet, austere and aloof, and let your gaze drift slowly over their faces. You note their looks of expectation; the adults hope you'll come to them first, while the child hopes you aren't going to bite. You turn and walk away toward the door. | |
| ""Where is the pussycat going?"" asks the kid. She sounds genuinely worried, maybe even frightened. Claire suddenly leaps past you for the door. The bang it makes when it shuts causes both you and Moon to jump, but it's only Moon who does the crying. You opt to dart for cover, and fortunately there's plenty of it. | |
| ""The pussycat doesn't like us,"" the child says through her tears. Andre stops playing his guitar to come and comfort her. | |
| ""The pussycat is scared, Moon, honey,"" he explains. ""Cats don't like it when doors slam either."" | |
| Claire throws Andre a look while you creep along under the sofa, whiskers twitching and ears on the alert. No other way out of the room is apparent, and Claire seems to think it's a good idea to dig you out from under the couch. Her sideways-tilted face appears in the small horizon between carpet and sofa. She calls softly to you to ""come here, puss."" When you show no signs of moving, she reaches in a hand.", | |
| 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stand on your hind legs and scratch at the window with your paws, but it still takes him a while to notice you. With his scowl focused deeper in the house, he's clearly quite distracted and annoyed. You shift your balance a little so you can scrape at the window more quickly. As Helmut curses and spits the name Maddox, your tactics finally hit him in the ego. It looks to him like you want to meet him desperately. | |
| ""Oh,"" he says, pulling away from the window and leaning his hands on his knees. His face falls back into its usual shape: jowly, with big puffy lips. His eyes remain as squinty as they were when he was squashed against the windowpane. | |
| He gives you a wave and the sort of uncomfortable smile that proves he's not very used to giving them. If it's true that he's a man not inclined to like animals, it looks like you might be an exception. You're a creature smart enough to recognize importance when you see it, he seems to conclude, drumming the glass near your nose with with his thick, hairy fingers.","At that moment, a car pulls up into the driveway—Andre's car, the revamped station wagon you arrived here in just yesterday. It's bumpy and loud, a relic from the seventies. He's clearly pretty proud to have ""fixed it up,"" even if bits keep falling off of it. | |
| Like now. There's a problem with the fan belt, and the screech assaults your ears even through the double glazing. The oversize record mogul turns, winces, and does some odd kind of salute to Andre. He strides toward the car as it pulls in, and you squash your nose up to the window, intrigued by what these two might have to say. | |
| Andre jumps out of the car with an embarrassing level of enthusiasm. ""Helmut! How's life treating you?"" | |
| ""Fine, fine. I just came over to check if you'd seen that mangy cat of mine."" Helmut pushes a puffy hand into his pocket to draw out his phone. ""He's run off again, and if my niece finds out, I'll never hear the end of it."" | |
| ""Oh! The cat's name is Maddox, isn't it? I'm so sorry to hear it!"" Andre doesn't sound very sorry at all. He stands there, swaying back and forth with his hands in his pockets and an incongruous grin on his face. | |
| Helmut nods and taps casually at his phone. ""Well?"" | |
| ""Oh! No, no sign, but then I only just got here. We could both—"" Andre's attempt to get pally with Helmut is cut short by a ""Daaaddyyy"" from Moon, as a reminder to him that she's still strapped to her seat inside the car. Andre tears himself away from his neighbor, popping the rear door hurriedly and unclicking her seat belt. She scrambles out mostly by herself.","be home early today. Let's ask her if she's seen Maddox when she gets in."" | |
| Andre moves Moon in front of him like he's about to push her headfirst through the door. | |
| ""Thanks,"" Helmut mutters. | |
| When he turns to leave, you can see Andre's panic. ""You know, if you're not busy, we could…"" | |
| But before he can finish his second attempt at buddying up to the CEO of the world's biggest music conglomerate, several things happen at once: Bene renews his barking in a rather gleeful tone, a small child practically falls through the front door, and Andre draws a nervous blank on how to invite Helmut inside without looking overly pathetic. Helmut himself is busy smirking, watching father and child make a mess of the simple task of getting in the house. With the door now actually open, it might be time for you to intervene.","You trot toward Moon, with your fur as fluffed and cuddly as you can make it. But pulling off ""cute"" to a kid who's actually scared of you is not the best tactic you've ever thought of. Your every movement seems too sudden for her, and she eventually screams for her dad. ""Aaahhh!"" | |
| The result is not really what you'd hoped: a child screaming and a waste-of-space man with his face all scrunched up in distaste. Andre fawns, stroking Moon's hair and shooing you as far away as possible. He wants her calm at all costs, lest this man whose company he so desperately seeks slip out of his tentative grasp. | |
| ""Well, I'd better leave you to it,"" Helmut says, glancing at Moon like she's some annoying insect. ""Kids. What a handful."" | |
| ""She'll be fine in a minute, I'm sure!"" Andre insists, as Bene redoubles his barking. | |
| ""No, really, you've got your hands full, and I wouldn't want to…you know."" He trails off, waving his hand. ""Let me know if there's any sign of Maddox."" | |
| The bulky entertainment giant turns, stopping for a second as his cell phone vibrates in his pocket.","As you'd hoped, your sudden movement makes her instantly afraid. | |
| ""Daddy!"" she wails, as you take a faux swipe at her and hiss. | |
| Job done. A child screaming, and a waste-of-space man with his face all scrunched up in distaste. Andre fawns over Moon, stroking her hair and shooing you as far away as possible. He wants her to calm at all costs, lest this man whose company he so desperately seeks slip out of his tentative grasp. | |
| ""Well, I'd better leave you to it,"" Helmut says, glancing at Moon like she's some annoying insect. ""Kids. What a handful."" | |
| ""She'll be fine in a minute, I'm sure!"" Andre insists. Bene redoubles his barking from the kitchen. | |
| ""Looks like you've got enough to deal with. I wouldn't want to…"" He trails off. ""Let me know if there's any sign of Maddox."" | |
| The bulky entertainment giant turns, stopping for a second as his cell phone vibrates in his pocket.", | |
| cat,"Yuèhai, Stinky","['Yuèhai, Stinky', 'Yuèhai', 'Stinky']",659,10160,"01_newhome_450,01_newhome_604,01_newhome_615,01_newhome_639,01_newhome_675,01_newhome_692,01_newhome_666,01_newhome_624,01_newhome_703,01_newhome_729,01_newhome_751,01_newhome_784,01_newhome_789,01_newhome_805,01_newhome_856,01_newhome_913,01_newhome_941,01_newhome_946,01_newhome_953,01_newhome_818,01_newhome_879,01_newhome_1015,01_newhome_1091,01_newhome_1122,01_newhome_1128,01_newhome_1210,01_newhome_1301,01_newhome_1361,01_newhome_1369,01_newhome_1398,01_newhome_1416,01_newhome_1474,01_newhome_1503,01_newhome_2283,01_newhome_2286,01_newhome_2289,01_newhome_2594,01_newhome_2602,01_newhome_2609,01_newhome_2619,01_newhome_2626,02_bene_94,01_newhome_2691,01_newhome_2698,02_bene_158,02_bene_387,02_bene_189,02_bene_196,02_bene_214,02_bene_242,02_bene_250,02_bene_281,02_bene_319,02_bene_324,02_bene_438,02_bene_553,02_bene_654,02_bene_668,02_bene_687,02_bene_689,02_bene_714,02_bene_771,02_bene_780,02_bene_790,02_bene_945,02_bene_1289,02_bene_1320,02_bene_1271,02_bene_1281,02_bene_1650,02_bene_1668,02_bene_1680,02_bene_1722,02_bene_1847,02_bene_2177,03_maddox_50,03_maddox_78,03_maddox_90,03_maddox_148,03_maddox_231,03_maddox_248,03_maddox_294,03_maddox_328,03_maddox_372,03_maddox_453,03_maddox_2255,03_maddox_2331,03_maddox_695,03_maddox_2516,03_maddox_743,03_maddox_2500,03_maddox_2715,03_maddox_843,03_maddox_876,03_maddox_2800,03_maddox_2805,03_maddox_1080,03_maddox_1098,03_maddox_2955,03_maddox_3122,03_maddox_1663,03_maddox_3143,03_maddox_3152,03_maddox_1498,03_maddox_1505,03_maddox_1509,03_maddox_1578,03_maddox_1603,03_maddox_1665,03_maddox_3225,03_maddox_3276,03_maddox_3340,03_maddox_3331,03_maddox_3388,03_maddox_3439,03_maddox_3456,03_maddox_3494,03_maddox_3526,03_maddox_3543,03_maddox_3590,03_maddox_3599,03_maddox_3732,03_maddox_3776,04_familytension_76,04_familytension_99,04_familytension_335,04_familytension_338,04_familytension_148,04_familytension_154,04_familytension_211,04_familytension_219,04_familytension_240,04_familytension_250,04_familytension_262,04_familytension_285,04_familytension_644,04_familytension_676,04_familytension_698,04_familytension_805,04_familytension_686,04_familytension_789,04_familytension_532,04_familytension_952,04_familytension_955,04_familytension_958,04_familytension_977,04_familytension_1013,04_familytension_1025,04_familytension_1035,04_familytension_1183,04_familytension_1189,04_familytension_1196,04_familytension_1113,04_familytension_4609,04_familytension_1317,04_familytension_1321,04_familytension_1325,04_familytension_1329,04_familytension_3234,04_familytension_3241,04_familytension_3806,04_familytension_3357,04_familytension_3444,04_familytension_3841,04_familytension_3758,04_familytension_3781,04_familytension_3326,04_familytension_3464,04_familytension_3819,04_familytension_4058,04_familytension_1446,04_familytension_1469,04_familytension_3911,04_familytension_3950,04_familytension_1481,04_familytension_4917,04_familytension_4936,04_familytension_1576,04_familytension_3596,04_familytension_5711,04_familytension_5730,04_familytension_4952,04_familytension_1653,04_familytension_1737,04_familytension_1552,04_familytension_4956,04_familytension_4929,04_familytension_1690,04_familytension_4137,04_familytension_4141,04_familytension_4224,04_familytension_4299,04_familytension_6161,04_familytension_6669,04_familytension_6684,04_familytension_5787,04_familytension_4314,04_familytension_6253,04_familytension_5920,04_familytension_5936,04_familytension_5941,04_familytension_6096,04_familytension_6351,04_familytension_6388,04_familytension_5809,04_familytension_6447,04_familytension_6455,05_bigdecision_49,05_bigdecision_192,05_bigdecision_367,05_bigdecision_375,05_bigdecision_56,05_bigdecision_95,05_bigdecision_246,05_bigdecision_292,05_bigdecision_295,05_bigdecision_71,05_bigdecision_382,05_bigdecision_431,05_bigdecision_681,05_bigdecision_701,05_bigdecision_628,05_bigdecision_641,05_bigdecision_663,05_bigdecision_696,05_bigdecision_768,05_bigdecision_840,05_bigdecision_846,05_bigdecision_814,05_bigdecision_923,05_bigdecision_930,05_bigdecision_982,05_bigdecision_965,05_bigdecision_1266,05_bigdecision_1035,05_bigdecision_1083,05_bigdecision_1090,05_bigdecision_1133,05_bigdecision_1177,05_bigdecision_1218,05_bigdecision_1225,05_bigdecision_1319,05_bigdecision_1366,05_bigdecision_1372,05_bigdecision_1444,06_dinner_106,06_dinner_115,06_dinner_167,06_dinner_64,06_dinner_132,06_dinner_146,06_dinner_274,06_dinner_287,06_dinner_462,06_dinner_679,06_dinner_682,06_dinner_688,06_dinner_739,06_dinner_839,06_dinner_602,06_dinner_764,06_dinner_767,06_dinner_702,06_dinner_705,07_invitesonly_493,07_invitesonly_542,07_invitesonly_548,07_invitesonly_601,07_invitesonly_634,07_invitesonly_636,07_invitesonly_781,07_invitesonly_1024,07_invitesonly_1045,07_invitesonly_1006,07_invitesonly_1011,07_invitesonly_869,07_invitesonly_882,07_invitesonly_1323,07_invitesonly_1360,07_invitesonly_1498,07_invitesonly_1549,07_invitesonly_1817,07_invitesonly_1936,07_invitesonly_1806,07_inv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,06_dinner_2138,06_dinner_2142,06_dinner_2148,06_dinner_2183,06_dinner_2287,06_dinner_2297,06_dinner_2189,06_dinner_2388,06_dinner_2476,06_dinner_2486,06_dinner_2426,06_dinner_2429,06_dinner_2569,06_dinner_2599,06_dinner_2655,06_dinner_1298,06_dinner_1513,06_dinner_1530,06_dinner_1463,06_dinner_1472,06_dinner_1475,06_dinner_1638,06_dinner_1598,06_dinner_1986,06_dinner_1702,06_dinner_1714,06_dinner_1910,06_dinner_2030,06_dinner_3941,05_bigdecision_1869,05_bigdecision_1881,05_bigdecision_1810,05_bigdecision_1728,05_bigdecision_1739,05_bigdecision_1765,05_bigdecision_1769,05_bigdecision_1773,05_bigdecision_1789,04_familytension_2140,04_familytension_2149,04_familytension_2196,04_familytension_3029,04_familytension_3011,04_familytension_3014,04_familytension_3017,04_familytension_1981,04_familytension_1989,04_familytension_2010,04_familytension_2042,04_familytension_2057,04_familytension_2072,04_familytension_2775,04_familytension_2582,04_familytension_2591,04_familytension_2764,04_familytension_2826,04_familytension_2642,04_familytension_2687,04_familytension_2817,04_familytension_2561,04_familytension_2715,04_familytension_2386,04_familytension_1868,04_familytension_1881,04_familytension_1910,04_familytension_1906,03_maddox_1790,03_maddox_4138,03_maddox_4141,03_maddox_4148,02_bene_2221,02_bene_2227,01_newhome_1615,01_newhome_2164,01_newhome_2168,01_newhome_1878,01_newhome_1881,01_newhome_1960,01_newhome_1993,01_newhome_2021,01_newhome_1941,01_newhome_2027,01_newhome_2049,01_newhome_1946,01_newhome_1740,01_newhome_1800,01_newhome_1804","Hah. I'll decide if it's fun on the basis of the outcome. | |
| There is only so much one can expect from interfering. Guiding humans' thoughts as precisely as you'd like to at this moment takes more skill and personal knowledge than you currently have. For better or worse, though, Moon is hypnotized by the impatient flicking of your tail. She tugs at her mum's dress to make her look. | |
| ""Why is the pussycat moving its tail like that?"" she says, staring wide-eyed at her mother. | |
| ""It could be lots of reasons, hon,"" comes her mother's not-so-informative reply. ""Now go grab something for me to write with, OK?"" | |
| Moon ponders for a second with one finger on her mouth. ""Maybe Stinky's really happy!"" she enthuses. ""When Bene wags his tail, he's happy."" | |
| The crow's-feet around Claire's eyes deepen as she smiles. She certainly finds Moon's comment more amusing than most cats would; having one's well-thought-out and articulate gestures compared to the crassness of a dog's is obviously an insult. | |
| ""Go on, grab a crayon or something,"" Claire says.","Cleverly and sedately sit on my own tail. That way, Moon can't grab it. | |
| Claire tries to stifle a laugh as Moon's hand shrivels back in confusion. ""Moon, honey, don't try to pull Stinky's tail. Cats are not toys."" | |
| ""I wasn't, I was just…,"" Moon stammers, and tries to pat you on the head instead. It's a lot like finding yourself stuck beneath a printing press. | |
| Claire sighs and heads over to Moon to show her how it's done. ""If you hurt him, he won't want to come to you."" | |
| Moon goes for it again, and it's basically just as traumatic. | |
| ""Moon, if you can't be gentle, you're going to have to stop."" Claire takes Moon's hand off you, and her bottom lip emerges. Her pout is more stubborn than sad, and it's clear that she's losing her fear of you.","Take a swipe at her to make it obvious I won't be her friend. | |
| Claire jumps toward Moon, as her daughter's hand shrivels back in horror. ""Oh, honey. Are you hurt?"" | |
| ""I wasn't, I…I hate Stinky,"" Moon stammers through her tears, as Claire examines the extent of your scratches. | |
| ""It's OK, honey. It's just a scratch. Don't forget, if you try to hurt him, he won't want to come to you."" | |
| Moon's bottom lip quivers. ""But I only wanted to play.""","Take a swipe at her: the foolproof way to say, ""I'm not befriending a four-year-old."" | |
| ""Hey!"" Claire's reactions are fast. She dodges, then growls at you, her lips drawing back to reveal tidy teeth. Hardly deadly, but you're surprised by the gesture. Andre stifles a laugh. Moon makes a dash for the back of one of the chairs and cowers. | |
| ""Maybe later?"" Claire says without conviction. ""Maybe Stinky has just had enough for today.""","Dash under the furniture. I have a premonition that it's safer than being her friend. | |
| Your sudden mad dash makes Moon wail. It's high pitched but short lived, thanks to Andre's intervention. | |
| ""So much for that idea,"" he says with a laugh. ""Looks like Stinky has had enough for one day."" | |
| As Moon clutches her father's shirt with both fists, Claire gets down on all fours. Her cropped hair bobs into your view as she scopes out where you are. You inch back farther into shadow, hoping you look difficult to extract.", | |
| cat,Claw Bene,"['Bene', 'Claw Bene']",608,10160,"01_newhome_450,02_bene_153,02_bene_158,02_bene_220,02_bene_387,02_bene_256,02_bene_329,02_bene_177,02_bene_184,02_bene_189,02_bene_196,02_bene_207,02_bene_227,02_bene_234,02_bene_242,02_bene_250,02_bene_259,02_bene_274,02_bene_281,02_bene_288,02_bene_296,02_bene_302,02_bene_309,02_bene_319,02_bene_334,02_bene_345,02_bene_356,02_bene_362,02_bene_372,02_bene_378,02_bene_396,02_bene_419,02_bene_451,02_bene_488,02_bene_414,02_bene_421,02_bene_430,02_bene_438,02_bene_445,02_bene_452,02_bene_506,02_bene_521,02_bene_498,02_bene_502,02_bene_507,02_bene_517,02_bene_522,02_bene_534,02_bene_540,02_bene_553,02_bene_564,02_bene_595,02_bene_613,02_bene_689,02_bene_698,02_bene_701,02_bene_714,02_bene_726,02_bene_734,02_bene_742,02_bene_771,02_bene_775,02_bene_780,02_bene_784,02_bene_795,02_bene_882,02_bene_935,02_bene_950,02_bene_958,02_bene_976,02_bene_986,02_bene_990,02_bene_998,02_bene_1008,02_bene_1146,02_bene_1036,02_bene_1044,02_bene_1067,02_bene_1093,02_bene_1137,02_bene_1150,02_bene_1158,02_bene_1167,02_bene_1050,02_bene_1056,02_bene_1076,02_bene_1081,02_bene_1219,02_bene_1207,02_bene_1213,02_bene_1306,02_bene_1330,02_bene_1354,02_bene_1243,02_bene_1289,02_bene_1310,02_bene_1320,02_bene_1335,02_bene_1346,02_bene_1360,02_bene_1271,02_bene_1281,02_bene_1294,02_bene_1369,02_bene_1396,02_bene_1459,02_bene_1507,02_bene_1571,02_bene_1586,02_bene_1680,02_bene_1694,02_bene_1728,02_bene_1626,02_bene_2006,02_bene_1941,02_bene_2062,02_bene_2067,02_bene_1946,02_bene_2077,02_bene_2146,02_bene_2153,02_bene_2160,02_bene_2164,02_bene_2177,03_maddox_41,03_maddox_576,03_maddox_589,03_maddox_602,03_maddox_611,03_maddox_615,03_maddox_619,03_maddox_628,03_maddox_639,03_maddox_723,03_maddox_3084,03_maddox_3119,03_maddox_3133,03_maddox_3198,03_maddox_1546,03_maddox_1559,03_maddox_3161,03_maddox_3183,03_maddox_3296,03_maddox_3237,03_maddox_3276,03_maddox_3281,03_maddox_3290,03_maddox_3311,03_maddox_3321,03_maddox_3340,03_maddox_3369,03_maddox_3379,03_maddox_3388,03_maddox_3354,03_maddox_3363,03_maddox_3433,03_maddox_3481,03_maddox_3486,03_maddox_3494,03_maddox_3522,03_maddox_3551,03_maddox_3559,03_maddox_3578,04_familytension_554,04_familytension_562,04_familytension_569,04_familytension_522,04_familytension_550,04_familytension_584,04_familytension_881,04_familytension_830,04_familytension_532,04_familytension_1016,04_familytension_1057,04_familytension_1189,04_familytension_1247,04_familytension_4618,04_familytension_4656,04_familytension_3253,04_familytension_4742,04_familytension_4766,04_familytension_3390,04_familytension_4666,04_familytension_4671,04_familytension_4703,04_familytension_4748,04_familytension_3734,04_familytension_4082,04_familytension_4819,04_familytension_4754,04_familytension_4760,04_familytension_3715,04_familytension_4827,04_familytension_4840,04_familytension_3410,04_familytension_3726,04_familytension_4397,04_familytension_4448,04_familytension_4829,04_familytension_4842,04_familytension_4874,04_familytension_6484,04_familytension_4090,04_familytension_4399,04_familytension_4406,04_familytension_4966,04_familytension_4936,04_familytension_6616,04_familytension_4979,04_familytension_4984,04_familytension_6146,04_familytension_6515,04_familytension_6533,04_familytension_6543,04_familytension_3424,04_familytension_6516,04_familytension_6521,04_familytension_6565,04_familytension_4145,04_familytension_4170,04_familytension_1690,04_familytension_6574,04_familytension_6580,04_familytension_6591,04_familytension_4112,04_familytension_4137,04_familytension_4141,04_familytension_4154,04_familytension_4215,04_familytension_4239,04_familytension_4118,04_familytension_4155,04_familytension_4161,04_familytension_4247,04_familytension_6284,04_familytension_6294,04_familytension_4182,04_familytension_4209,04_familytension_5884,04_familytension_5994,04_familytension_6170,04_familytension_6338,04_familytension_6678,04_familytension_6684,04_familytension_6014,04_familytension_6128,04_familytension_5955,04_familytension_5961,04_familytension_5967,04_familytension_5990,04_familytension_6007,04_familytension_6017,04_familytension_6022,04_familytension_6114,04_familytension_6120,04_familytension_6405,04_familytension_6462,04_familytension_5567,05_bigdecision_228,05_bigdecision_380,05_bigdecision_382,05_bigdecision_389,05_bigdecision_404,05_bigdecision_473,05_bigdecision_501,05_bigdecision_478,05_bigdecision_489,05_bigdecision_480,05_bigdecision_484,05_bigdecision_492,05_bigdecision_528,05_bigdecision_531,05_bigdecision_658,05_bigdecision_755,05_bigdecision_645,05_bigdecision_1014,05_bigdecision_1046,05_bigdecision_1270,05_bigdecision_1274,05_bigdecision_1027,05_bigdecision_1295,05_bigdecision_1035,05_bigdecision_1083,05_bigdecision_1534,05_bigdecision_1512,06_dinner_0,06_dinner_73,06_dinner_290,06_dinner_300,06_dinner_292,06_dinner_378,07_invitesonly_869,07_invitesonly_1423,07_invitesonly_1221,07_invitesonly_1228,07_invitesonly_1081,07_invitesonly_1498,07_invitesonly_1549,07_invitesonly_1414,07_invitesonly_2169,0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amilytension_5231,04_familytension_5260,04_familytension_5264,04_familytension_5272,04_familytension_5190,04_familytension_5233,04_familytension_5160,04_familytension_5210,04_familytension_5164,04_familytension_5215,04_familytension_5221,04_familytension_6833,04_familytension_6841,04_familytension_4501,04_familytension_4507,04_familytension_4515,04_familytension_4521,04_familytension_4529,04_familytension_4551,04_familytension_4587,04_familytension_4567,04_familytension_2196,04_familytension_6725,02_bene_2285","Hah. I'll decide if it's fun on the basis of the outcome. | |
| There is only so much one can expect from interfering. Guiding humans' thoughts as precisely as you'd like to at this moment takes more skill and personal knowledge than you currently have. For better or worse, though, Moon is hypnotized by the impatient flicking of your tail. She tugs at her mum's dress to make her look. | |
| ""Why is the pussycat moving its tail like that?"" she says, staring wide-eyed at her mother. | |
| ""It could be lots of reasons, hon,"" comes her mother's not-so-informative reply. ""Now go grab something for me to write with, OK?"" | |
| Moon ponders for a second with one finger on her mouth. ""Maybe Stinky's really happy!"" she enthuses. ""When Bene wags his tail, he's happy."" | |
| The crow's-feet around Claire's eyes deepen as she smiles. She certainly finds Moon's comment more amusing than most cats would; having one's well-thought-out and articulate gestures compared to the crassness of a dog's is obviously an insult. | |
| ""Go on, grab a crayon or something,"" Claire says.","""I know, Bene, I know,"" says Claire. ""A whole night by yourself just waiting to meet Stinky."" The dog called Bene has made Claire's morning brighter in one wag of that tail, despite what looks to you more like a wrestling match than the cross-species hug it actually is. She rubs Bene's shoulders vigorously with both hands before taking his paws and placing them gently on the carpet. Bene continues to wash her face with his tongue until Claire straightens up.","""Good dog, good dog,"" Claire says, wiping her mouth as Bene opts for dashing around on all fours instead. She grabs him, soothing his excitement as best she can as she leads him farther into the kitchen. ""Patience, my love. You can meet Stinky when you're less likely to freak him out with your enthusiasm."" | |
| She turns and locates you with her eyes. | |
| Bene slips out of his collar. | |
| ""Bene, no!"" Claire calls after him as his flapping ears and lumbering paws head for you. ""Come here!"" | |
| But Bene does not come here. In fact, there's almost no time to think about whether he's a potential ally or whether it's safer to scare him into obedience. No sooner has Claire cried out a warning—that Bene ""just wants to be friends""—than this great canine creature is upon you, tongue lolling, a jovial spring in his step. He is:","Clearly keen to play. | |
| As Bene comes hurtling toward you, you're unsure if he'll stop or if he'll bowl you into orbit. Surely a dog as keen to be playmates as this one could not be that stupid. At least, that's what you think in the milliseconds you have to consider it. The abrupt halt must be coming—and he'll do that thing that all dogs do, where they sniff all the bits of you that humans find smelly or offensive. | |
| All things so quickly considered, you decide to:","You sink deeper into your nest of towels. | |
| ""Good dog."" Claire wipes her mouth as Bene continues his bounding on all fours. ""So, Stinky,"" she says, turning in a circle and squinting in all directions. When no sign of you is apparent, she sighs. | |
| ""Sorry, Bene, but you can make friends with him…ah, as soon as he", | |
| 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better. Poor Mummy is too obsessed with being smart to let you shine, isn't she, princess?"" the woman says in goo-goo tones, moving on to adjusting Moon's T-shirt. ""It's just not fair, is it? And it's not fair to make you wear dark green and trousers. You look like a miniature soldier."" | |
| Claire's face contorts. ""Nola, I have told you. This is my house and my child. If you don't take my way of doing things seriously, I will actually ask you to leave."" | |
| It's a pretty bad sign when a human calls a parent by their real name. The twiggy dame now shrugs it off, putting her hands on Moon's shoulders and massaging them as if the child needs relief from the strain of her upbringing. | |
| ""I'm only saying—"" | |
| ""Well, don't,"" Claire says, holding up a palm. ""Moon, go and help your dad."" | |
| Before she can escape, Moon's grandma squashes a box into her hand. ""A present, dear,"" she says as Moon beams up at her, then runs. Her braids bob as she trots off to the kitchen, tearing at the paper as she goes. | |
| The two women stand in silence, Claire with her arms folded, Nola toying with the pearl studs in her ears.","I break the uncomfortable silence with a timely meow to be fed. | |
| ""Oh, what does it [i]want[/i]?"" Nola shakes her head in irritation. | |
| ""Mum, he's a cat, the list is hardly long,"" Claire says offhandedly.","I slither in between the pair in hope of some reciprocal affection. | |
| ""Oh, what does it [i]want[/i]?"" Nola takes a step back looking angry.",Let Bene out. His messy presence will upset Nola so I don't have to do it myself.,"You trot toward the living-room door and then leap up at the knob. Round doorknobs are usually a horror, but in this case, the catch has not clicked in, and you open the door on the first try. You're bowled aside as Bene bursts forward, bounding, wagging, tongue a-flying. He jumps, paws first, on Nola, who staggers at his weight. | |
| ""Get off! Stupid creature!"" | |
| It would seem that every animal is a ""creature"" in her world. Bene takes this insult well. To him, it's a deeply coded cue to try again. Labradors are ever optimistic. | |
| As Claire wrestles the yellow mess back to the ground, you lie low. Several dog-aimed insults later, Bene is back inside the living room. | |
| Claire's mum wipes nonexistent paw marks from the front of her dress. ""That oafish beast could very well have ruined it!"" she fusses. | |
| Claire does narrowly escape a pending tirade.", | |
| cat,Magdalena,"['Magda', 'Magdalena']",481,10160,"01_newhome_703,03_maddox_831,03_maddox_806,03_maddox_1027,03_maddox_1033,03_maddox_1431,03_maddox_1186,03_maddox_1433,03_maddox_1155,03_maddox_1213,03_maddox_1436,03_maddox_1441,03_maddox_1451,03_maddox_1462,03_maddox_1004,03_maddox_1466,03_maddox_1469,03_maddox_1476,03_maddox_1354,03_maddox_1370,03_maddox_1485,03_maddox_1533,03_maddox_1611,03_maddox_1616,03_maddox_1557,03_maddox_1640,03_maddox_1541,03_maddox_1546,03_maddox_1559,03_maddox_1572,03_maddox_1578,03_maddox_1585,03_maddox_1591,03_maddox_1603,03_maddox_1630,03_maddox_1637,03_maddox_1641,03_maddox_1648,03_maddox_1653,03_maddox_1665,03_maddox_1684,03_maddox_3879,04_familytension_1183,04_familytension_1213,04_familytension_1217,04_familytension_1221,04_familytension_1113,04_familytension_1352,04_familytension_1355,04_familytension_1359,04_familytension_1363,04_familytension_1371,04_familytension_3491,04_familytension_3570,04_familytension_1435,04_familytension_1462,04_familytension_1517,04_familytension_1439,04_familytension_1469,04_familytension_1498,04_familytension_1524,04_familytension_3950,04_familytension_1427,04_familytension_1481,04_familytension_1485,04_familytension_1489,04_familytension_1458,04_familytension_1512,04_familytension_5702,04_familytension_5711,04_familytension_4979,04_familytension_4921,04_familytension_1827,04_familytension_1653,04_familytension_1664,04_familytension_1669,04_familytension_1711,04_familytension_1737,04_familytension_1755,04_familytension_1555,04_familytension_1581,04_familytension_1636,04_familytension_1841,04_familytension_1849,04_familytension_1680,04_familytension_1690,04_familytension_1726,04_familytension_1806,04_familytension_1699,04_familytension_1703,04_familytension_1802,04_familytension_5824,04_familytension_5830,04_familytension_5836,04_familytension_5840,04_familytension_5849,04_familytension_5857,04_familytension_5863,04_familytension_5877,04_familytension_5881,04_familytension_6096,04_familytension_5809,04_familytension_5652,05_bigdecision_1435,05_bigdecision_1482,05_bigdecision_1421,05_bigdecision_1455,05_bigdecision_1531,06_dinner_339,06_dinner_345,06_dinner_345,06_dinner_359,06_dinner_359,06_dinner_390,06_dinner_393,06_dinner_406,06_dinner_725,06_dinner_748,06_dinner_729,06_dinner_739,06_dinner_752,06_dinner_783,06_dinner_501,06_dinner_511,06_dinner_602,06_dinner_670,06_dinner_647,06_dinner_778,06_dinner_964,06_dinner_975,06_dinner_1183,07_invitesonly_772,07_invitesonly_777,07_invitesonly_781,07_invitesonly_1045,07_invitesonly_820,07_invitesonly_827,07_invitesonly_1004,07_invitesonly_1011,07_invitesonly_1423,07_invitesonly_1107,07_invitesonly_939,07_invitesonly_1182,07_invitesonly_1768,07_invitesonly_2638,08_theparty_259,08_theparty_326,08_theparty_328,08_theparty_268,08_theparty_281,08_theparty_334,08_theparty_374,08_theparty_455,08_theparty_443,08_theparty_489,08_theparty_514,08_theparty_430,08_theparty_520,08_theparty_469,08_theparty_553,08_theparty_2050,08_theparty_2078,08_theparty_3172,08_theparty_3185,08_theparty_3213,08_theparty_3215,08_theparty_6745,08_theparty_6748,08_theparty_6808,08_theparty_6757,08_theparty_6839,08_theparty_6876,08_theparty_6991,08_theparty_6947,08_theparty_6815,08_theparty_7003,08_theparty_7053,08_theparty_6960,08_theparty_6951,08_theparty_6846,08_theparty_6850,08_theparty_7032,08_theparty_6765,08_theparty_6854,08_theparty_7041,08_theparty_7025,08_theparty_7039,08_theparty_6796,08_theparty_6824,08_theparty_6827,08_theparty_6830,08_theparty_6923,09_inthenews_2256,09_inthenews_2259,03_maddox_1480,03_maddox_1481,05_bigdecision_1562,07_invitesonly_922,07_invitesonly_961,07_invitesonly_935,07_invitesonly_937,07_invitesonly_2033,07_invitesonly_2163,07_invitesonly_2178,07_invitesonly_2628,07_invitesonly_2631,08_theparty_293,08_theparty_311,08_theparty_313,08_theparty_3413,08_theparty_3469,08_theparty_3874,08_theparty_6843,08_theparty_6995,08_theparty_6954,08_theparty_7021,08_theparty_6956,08_theparty_7023,08_theparty_7491,08_theparty_7485,08_theparty_7565,08_theparty_7568,08_theparty_7487,08_theparty_7573,08_theparty_7505,08_theparty_7527,08_theparty_7589,08_theparty_7514,08_theparty_7531,08_theparty_7535,08_theparty_7634,08_theparty_8348,08_theparty_8352,08_theparty_8356,08_theparty_8571,08_theparty_8128,08_theparty_8689,08_theparty_8716,08_theparty_11883,08_theparty_12034,08_theparty_11997,08_theparty_10021,08_theparty_10128,08_theparty_10155,07_invitesonly_4296,07_invitesonly_4170,07_invitesonly_4174,07_invitesonly_4181,07_invitesonly_4192,07_invitesonly_4184,07_invitesonly_4203,07_invitesonly_4226,07_invitesonly_4232,07_invitesonly_4243,07_invitesonly_4248,07_invitesonly_4260,07_invitesonly_4087,07_invitesonly_4074,07_invitesonly_4035,07_invitesonly_4043,07_invitesonly_4053,07_invitesonly_4060,07_invitesonly_4070,07_invitesonly_4083,07_invitesonly_4094,07_invitesonly_4105,06_dinner_4353,06_dinner_4363,06_dinner_2682,06_dinner_2693,06_dinner_2724,06_dinner_2778,06_dinner_2703,06_dinner_2709,06_dinner_2715,06_dinner_2732,06_dinner_2763,06_dinne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luxury of this place is certainly not lost on you. Even the wood of the coffee table matches the walnut inlays on the furniture. The furniture itself matches the curtains—the whole room a meticulous harmony of maroon and cream and wood. You wonder what it is these two do to have managed such a comfortable place. | |
| ""Shall I tell you about my day?"" Claire mumbles from the couch. She is, in fact, talking to you. ""My day was terrible. I lost support from Baska for the party-leadership campaign. Can you believe that? She was the one who put me forward!"" | |
| For a moment you wonder if she might really want a reply, but you figure it's more a rhetorical tirade. | |
| ""If I didn't have Magda on PR, I think I'd chuck politics altogether. You have no idea what reporters will do with your words, Stinky."" She shakes her head, her tidy, androgynous crop growing ever more hedgehoggy now that she can relax. ""Seriously, it's an all-out war now that Helen has resigned. After today, I wouldn't be surprised if Baska plans to run for the leadership herself."" | |
| You hear thuds overhead as you listen to unprompted recollections. Andre and Moon are doing whatever it is that people do to amuse their children. It dawns on you that there is also an upstairs to explore. You purr to yourself, and Claire laughs. | |
| ""So I'm not the only one who likes the sound of my voice? Fantastic!"" She holds out a hand in your direction, in that way humans do when they want you to come to them.","With a lightning-quick leap onto the keyboard, you knock the whole thing to the floor. As Claire scrabbles for you angrily, you vault from her reach. The keyboard is lying upside down. You give thanks to the little feline gods of good fortune and pounce on its smooth plastic underside, which has the effect of pressing nearly all the buttons at once. | |
| ""For fuck's sake!"" hollers Claire as her screen goes blank. She scoops you off the keyboard and takes the thing carefully in her hands. It isn't broken, and she seems grateful for small mercies. She still jumps when her cell phone rings suddenly. | |
| ""Magda, I'm sorry, the bloody cat just decided to jump on the keyboard,"" she says into the phone, trying to calm herself down. ""Oh. No, I didn't think of that."" She pauses. ""Not a bad idea. I did get a funny sort of feeling about her attitude."" | |
| Claire gives you an odd look as she sets her keyboard up again. It's no longer anger, but there is a lot of wariness. The sounds of her machine booting up compete with the end of Magda's call. | |
| ""Yep, logging back in now,"" she says. ""Good call, Magda. I should probably be grateful for unruly household pets!"" | |
| When the faces show back up on her screen, there are only three of them—Mike, Khaled, and Magda, the latter of whom says, ""Hello. How's the cat?""","You then flaunt your form, tail bobbing back and forth in view of the camera. The man called Mike raises his eyebrows—an expression that has some actual meaning on him. | |
| ""Are you all right there, Claire?"" Baska drawls. | |
| Claire scans Baska's face like a fox who's been locked out of a henhouse. The key to this woman is elusive, and she's certainly not to be trusted. Claire's fingers move over your skull, massaging it slowly like she's drawing on some dark and arcane magic. | |
| You do get some ""Oohs"" and ""Very cutes,"" but then Baska asks a question that's anathema to Claire: ""Not a purebred, of course, I'm assuming?"" | |
| ""You have to be kidding,"" Claire says. She mollycoddles you further, as if your very existence proved a point. ""Why would you even ask that?"" | |
| Baska waves her hand, like she's trying to erase what she said. She's one of those people who says things like ""Oh, I wouldn't use the word X"" in order to actually use the word. ""Oh, it's nothing. You're right, stupid question!"" | |
| ""Stinky is not an expensive inbred, brought into this world by people who see animals as money, no."" Claire's skin has gone warmer to the touch. | |
| Magda jumps in. ""Baska, we'd be wise to move on. Rakenstad, everyone?""","The muscles in Claire's jaw tighten. She's already struggling to hide the flicker of absolute rage that Baska has unleashed in her. She can't speak, lest she use words that start with C and F, but her hand comes out to encase your paw and place it back gently on her leg. She strokes you mechanically, like her hand is under the orders of some clumsy android arm. | |
| ""Good puss,"" she says through gritted teeth, and you raise your head into her palm, turning your cheek through her fingers to increase your tactile satisfaction. Khaled and Magda make admiring noises—probably mostly in the hopes that this will keep Claire stroking you and give her some semblance of calm.","There's a lot to be said for having to live up to one's own image. Annoying as you are, Claire can't afford to look angry in front of her colleagues. When she scrunches up her face and leans away, you bat at her a second time—softly, with no claws out. She closes a hand around your paw and places it gently on her thigh. The strokes that you wanted ensue. | |
| ""Good puss,"" Claire says through gritted teeth. | |
| ""Cute,"" mutters Magda, without much feeling. Khaled might be throwing you a smile, though, and you try to purr enough for him to hear. There's a good enough level of acknowledgment, you feel, as Claire continues stroking like a robot.", | |
| cat,Tail Claudette.,"['Claudette', 'Tail Claudette.']",301,10160,"03_maddox_3879,04_familytension_1841,04_familytension_5642,04_familytension_5646,05_bigdecision_1435,05_bigdecision_1482,05_bigdecision_1421,05_bigdecision_1455,06_dinner_339,06_dinner_345,06_dinner_390,06_dinner_501,06_dinner_602,06_dinner_647,06_dinner_964,06_dinner_1196,06_dinner_1199,06_dinner_1203,07_invitesonly_1842,07_invitesonly_2180,07_invitesonly_2690,07_invitesonly_2933,07_invitesonly_3008,07_invitesonly_3135,07_invitesonly_3156,07_invitesonly_2941,07_invitesonly_3005,07_invitesonly_3047,07_invitesonly_2987,07_invitesonly_3030,07_invitesonly_2845,07_invitesonly_2850,08_theparty_3162,08_theparty_3172,08_theparty_3166,08_theparty_3179,08_theparty_3185,08_theparty_3169,08_theparty_3213,08_theparty_3410,08_theparty_3215,08_theparty_3487,08_theparty_3490,08_theparty_3493,08_theparty_3496,08_theparty_6260,08_theparty_6286,08_theparty_6317,08_theparty_6360,08_theparty_6290,08_theparty_6309,08_theparty_6398,08_theparty_6267,08_theparty_6270,08_theparty_6273,08_theparty_6280,08_theparty_6343,08_theparty_6303,08_theparty_6480,08_theparty_6355,08_theparty_6331,08_theparty_3692,08_theparty_3699,08_theparty_4057,08_theparty_3703,08_theparty_6337,08_theparty_6748,08_theparty_6987,08_theparty_3581,08_theparty_6757,08_theparty_6839,08_theparty_6876,08_theparty_6991,08_theparty_6879,08_theparty_7003,08_theparty_6960,08_theparty_6998,08_theparty_6767,08_theparty_6888,08_theparty_7041,08_theparty_6771,08_theparty_6909,08_theparty_7025,08_theparty_7039,08_theparty_7050,08_theparty_6830,08_theparty_6916,08_theparty_6921,08_theparty_6923,08_theparty_6935,09_inthenews_466,09_inthenews_1054,07_invitesonly_2079,07_invitesonly_2067,07_invitesonly_2163,07_invitesonly_2165,07_invitesonly_2178,07_invitesonly_2361,07_invitesonly_2631,07_invitesonly_2963,07_invitesonly_2818,07_invitesonly_2867,07_invitesonly_2995,08_theparty_3176,08_theparty_3184,08_theparty_3418,08_theparty_3469,08_theparty_3471,08_theparty_3481,08_theparty_6335,08_theparty_6819,08_theparty_7048,08_theparty_6894,08_theparty_6898,08_theparty_4156,08_theparty_4175,09_inthenews_1059,09_inthenews_4507,09_inthenews_3657,09_inthenews_3652,09_inthenews_3660,09_inthenews_3668,09_inthenews_3538,09_inthenews_3557,09_inthenews_3612,09_inthenews_3675,09_inthenews_3688,09_inthenews_3618,09_inthenews_3550,09_inthenews_3623,09_inthenews_3628,09_inthenews_3696,09_inthenews_3709,09_inthenews_3630,09_inthenews_3702,09_inthenews_3635,09_inthenews_3641,09_inthenews_3781,09_inthenews_3646,09_inthenews_3784,09_inthenews_3806,09_inthenews_3810,09_inthenews_3799,09_inthenews_3800,08_theparty_7485,08_theparty_7565,08_theparty_7489,08_theparty_7573,08_theparty_7589,08_theparty_7510,08_theparty_7617,08_theparty_7634,08_theparty_7624,08_theparty_8345,08_theparty_8350,08_theparty_8354,08_theparty_8254,08_theparty_8257,08_theparty_8571,08_theparty_8650,08_theparty_8128,08_theparty_8135,08_theparty_8232,08_theparty_8292,08_theparty_8606,08_theparty_8694,08_theparty_8224,08_theparty_8243,08_theparty_8683,08_theparty_8746,08_theparty_8204,08_theparty_8278,08_theparty_8298,08_theparty_8328,08_theparty_8715,08_theparty_8628,08_theparty_8714,08_theparty_13153,08_theparty_13165,08_theparty_10587,08_theparty_10582,08_theparty_10590,08_theparty_10598,08_theparty_10470,08_theparty_10489,08_theparty_10544,08_theparty_10605,08_theparty_10619,08_theparty_10550,08_theparty_10482,08_theparty_10555,08_theparty_10559,08_theparty_10627,08_theparty_10640,08_theparty_10561,08_theparty_10633,08_theparty_10566,08_theparty_10572,08_theparty_10712,08_theparty_10577,08_theparty_10715,08_theparty_10738,08_theparty_10742,08_theparty_10730,08_theparty_10731,08_theparty_9993,08_theparty_10024,08_theparty_10111,08_theparty_10105,08_theparty_10149,08_theparty_10166,08_theparty_10190,08_theparty_10186,07_invitesonly_4296,07_invitesonly_4174,07_invitesonly_4184,07_invitesonly_4043,07_invitesonly_4053,07_invitesonly_4060,06_dinner_2128,06_dinner_2138,06_dinner_2142,06_dinner_2148,06_dinner_2154,06_dinner_2167,06_dinner_2171,06_dinner_2183,06_dinner_2185,06_dinner_2202,06_dinner_2222,06_dinner_2233,06_dinner_2245,06_dinner_2279,06_dinner_2297,06_dinner_2189,06_dinner_2194,06_dinner_2307,06_dinner_2413,06_dinner_2198,06_dinner_2419,06_dinner_2457,06_dinner_2473,06_dinner_2510,06_dinner_2326,06_dinner_2360,06_dinner_2380,06_dinner_2388,06_dinner_2395,06_dinner_2405,06_dinner_2421,06_dinner_2450,06_dinner_2476,06_dinner_2486,06_dinner_2517,06_dinner_2521,06_dinner_2525,06_dinner_2345,06_dinner_2438,06_dinner_2441,06_dinner_2544,06_dinner_2547,06_dinner_2550,06_dinner_2567,06_dinner_2569,06_dinner_2599,06_dinner_2623,06_dinner_2588,06_dinner_2642,06_dinner_2646,06_dinner_2651,06_dinner_2660,06_dinner_2666,06_dinner_2671,06_dinner_2677,06_dinner_2612,06_dinner_2616,06_dinner_4105,06_dinner_4110,06_dinner_4116,06_dinner_4120,06_dinner_4294,06_dinner_4297,06_dinner_3998,06_dinner_4253,05_bigdecision_1952,04_familytension_2088,04_familytension_2232,04_familytension_2091,04_familytension_2140,04_familytension_2149,04_familytension_2123,04_familytension_2186,04_familytension_2778,04_familytension_2648,04_familytension_2817,04_familytension_2715,04_familytension_2603,04_familytension_2270,04_familytension_2280,04_familytension_2319,04_familytension_2322","""Obviously, I'm fully behind never talking to him again,"" Andre says earnestly, catching a look of disbelief from Claire. ""I mean it, OK? But more importantly, we need to help Maddox, and make Helmut think twice before doing it to any other animal."" He scratches his sandpapery chin. | |
| Claire nods and pinches the bridge of her nose. Her eyes water with fatigue. ""I'll talk to Claudette about it, shall I?"" she suggests. | |
| ""Magda's partner?"" | |
| ""Yup. The one on the Animal Protection Association board. Trained as a lawyer, frizzy brown hair, bit of a hippie. That one."" | |
| Andre nods, unbuttoning his shirt. ""Yes, let's do that."" | |
| More clothes are slung on the floor. Andre's jeans nearly land right on you before the two of them flop into bed. The last thing you hear before drifting off to sleep is ""We'll get poor Maddox out of there.""","""Are you and Claudette free?"" Claire asks. ""I'd like to have a chat about this Helmut situation."" The next bit does not sound delicious: ""She's vegan, right?"" | |
| This is a word cats don't like. Vegans are people who profess to love animals and yet avoid eating anything they might share with their pets. Actually, it's worse, now that you think of it. Dogs will make do with a vegan's most odious waste, which means vegans are people who discriminate, food-wise, against cats. Animal helper, yet feline discriminator. Humans are full of inconsistencies. | |
| Magda confirms the accusation: ""Yes. I hope it isn't too much trouble."" At least that sounds a bit like an apology. | |
| Claire is too forgiving. ""Not at all!"" she says. ""Andre likes cooking vegan. He sees it as a challenge. Sunday at seven, then? The two of you?"" | |
| Arrangements are finalized as you lose hope for interesting tidbits. When the call finally ends, you comfort yourself with the fact of your achievements—even if you won't be rewarded twice for them.","Claudette is vegan, right? Great idea to bring her in on the Helmut situation. We could use her help. I'll do my nut cutlets for the main dish tomorrow, shall I?"" | |
| Claire is too asleep to properly answer.","Claudette is vegan, right? You know, I'm not sure it's a great idea to bring her in on this Helmut situation. She's kinda feisty."" | |
| ""A bit late now, honey, she's invited."" Claire moans and turns over, dragging blankets. | |
| Andre ruminates a little. ""OK. Then, nut cutlets as the main dish?"" | |
| Claire is too asleep to properly answer.","It's no accident the word ""aerosol"" is so much like the word for a certain part of one's rear-end anatomy, for cats at least. You position your own aerosol near the first of five doorframes, this one leading into the main bedroom. You have a visceral sense of how much you have to work with, and your artful application has as much talent and method as the very best street artists. Four doorways in, and you hear Claire's phone ring downstairs. | |
| Claire doesn't keep her voice low. She speaks in those tones used for people who are hard of hearing—or for making sure anyone listening in knows full well what's going on. ""We've already got Magda and Claudette for dinner, Mum, so I'm not sure it's the best day to come over,"" Claire says. | |
| Her tone is clipped and stressed, and you have a sense you'd better hurry. The final door is Andre's, and you spray, then dash inside as Claire's feet stomp straight up the stairs.", | |
| cat,Gillaine Bellevue,"['Gillaine Bellevue', 'Gillaine']",254,10160,"08_theparty_2160,08_theparty_2175,08_theparty_2178,08_theparty_2189,08_theparty_2196,08_theparty_2199,08_theparty_2204,08_theparty_2226,08_theparty_2242,08_theparty_2245,08_theparty_2248,08_theparty_2343,08_theparty_2323,08_theparty_2347,08_theparty_2309,08_theparty_2386,08_theparty_2599,08_theparty_2636,08_theparty_2663,08_theparty_2334,08_theparty_2361,08_theparty_2393,08_theparty_2621,08_theparty_2396,08_theparty_2544,08_theparty_2583,08_theparty_2399,08_theparty_2451,08_theparty_2573,08_theparty_2999,08_theparty_3035,08_theparty_3078,08_theparty_3082,08_theparty_3353,08_theparty_3873,08_theparty_3928,08_theparty_3962,08_theparty_3917,08_theparty_3917,08_theparty_4000,08_theparty_4011,08_theparty_4580,08_theparty_6480,08_theparty_6441,08_theparty_3677,08_theparty_3709,08_theparty_7073,08_theparty_4656,08_theparty_7157,08_theparty_4663,08_theparty_7098,08_theparty_7119,08_theparty_7205,08_theparty_7105,08_theparty_7182,08_theparty_7221,08_theparty_7275,08_theparty_7187,08_theparty_4672,08_theparty_4674,08_theparty_4676,08_theparty_4679,08_theparty_7129,08_theparty_7252,08_theparty_7294,08_theparty_7114,08_theparty_7134,08_theparty_7194,08_theparty_7260,08_theparty_7238,08_theparty_7300,08_theparty_4250,08_theparty_4367,08_theparty_7200,08_theparty_7244,08_theparty_4285,08_theparty_7143,08_theparty_7270,08_theparty_7152,08_theparty_4458,08_theparty_4542,09_inthenews_837,09_inthenews_560,09_inthenews_843,09_inthenews_672,09_inthenews_707,09_inthenews_783,09_inthenews_734,09_inthenews_750,09_inthenews_959,09_inthenews_985,09_inthenews_1167,09_inthenews_1175,09_inthenews_1409,09_inthenews_2206,09_inthenews_2221,08_theparty_2155,08_theparty_2157,08_theparty_2170,08_theparty_2569,08_theparty_2739,08_theparty_3305,08_theparty_3307,08_theparty_3337,08_theparty_3418,08_theparty_3339,08_theparty_3342,08_theparty_3344,08_theparty_3348,08_theparty_3869,08_theparty_3871,08_theparty_3484,08_theparty_4666,08_theparty_4118,08_theparty_7185,08_theparty_4292,08_theparty_4293,09_inthenews_2186,09_inthenews_2212,09_inthenews_2219,09_inthenews_2249,09_inthenews_2251,09_inthenews_2236,09_inthenews_2253,09_inthenews_1951,08_theparty_7660,08_theparty_7665,08_theparty_7708,08_theparty_7711,08_theparty_7862,08_theparty_7671,08_theparty_7716,08_theparty_7732,08_theparty_7913,08_theparty_7686,08_theparty_7725,08_theparty_7754,08_theparty_7907,08_theparty_7923,08_theparty_7690,08_theparty_7728,08_theparty_7758,08_theparty_7768,08_theparty_7808,08_theparty_7829,08_theparty_7930,08_theparty_7694,08_theparty_7810,08_theparty_7812,08_theparty_7815,08_theparty_7827,08_theparty_7944,08_theparty_7697,08_theparty_7837,08_theparty_7952,08_theparty_7970,08_theparty_7822,08_theparty_7825,08_theparty_7840,08_theparty_7958,08_theparty_7960,08_theparty_7975,08_theparty_7986,08_theparty_8006,08_theparty_7997,08_theparty_7793,08_theparty_6130,08_theparty_6138,08_theparty_6141,08_theparty_6158,08_theparty_6159,08_theparty_6186,08_theparty_5946,08_theparty_6183,08_theparty_6209,08_theparty_8078,08_theparty_8641,08_theparty_8647,08_theparty_8765,08_theparty_8768,08_theparty_8087,08_theparty_8099,08_theparty_8103,08_theparty_8490,08_theparty_8167,08_theparty_8515,08_theparty_12700,08_theparty_12704,08_theparty_12730,08_theparty_5159,08_theparty_5180,08_theparty_5190,08_theparty_5240,08_theparty_5243,08_theparty_5268,08_theparty_5257,08_theparty_5273,08_theparty_5317,08_theparty_5321,08_theparty_5368,08_theparty_5371,08_theparty_5206,08_theparty_5254,08_theparty_5286,08_theparty_5372,08_theparty_5374,08_theparty_5386,08_theparty_5390,08_theparty_5291,08_theparty_5325,08_theparty_5410,08_theparty_5216,08_theparty_5283,08_theparty_5296,08_theparty_5399,08_theparty_5417,08_theparty_5419,08_theparty_5436,08_theparty_5220,08_theparty_5226,08_theparty_5300,08_theparty_5351,08_theparty_5442,08_theparty_5444,08_theparty_5304,08_theparty_4890,08_theparty_4897,08_theparty_4899,08_theparty_4942,08_theparty_4931,08_theparty_4950,08_theparty_4978,08_theparty_4966,08_theparty_4983,08_theparty_5045,08_theparty_4970,08_theparty_4972,08_theparty_4974,08_theparty_4997,08_theparty_5029,08_theparty_5059,08_theparty_5098,08_theparty_5000,08_theparty_5066,08_theparty_5081,08_theparty_5037,08_theparty_5110,08_theparty_5015,08_theparty_5087,08_theparty_5128,08_theparty_5090,08_theparty_5131,08_theparty_5133,08_theparty_5095","""Gillaine played drums in my band, remember?"" Andre tells Nola, as Claire and Gillaine untangle from their embrace. | |
| ""Oh."" Nola avoids answering the question, reaching out a bangled, spangly arm in clear distaste. ""A [i]musician[/i]."" | |
| ""I'm a freelance writer, these days,"" Gillaine says quickly, taking the older woman's hand with no enthusiasm. She lets go quickly, bending down to say hello to you instead. ""You must be Stinky.""","I lick her hand. If she smells like vanilla, she's either really nice or made of food. | |
| You lick Gillaine's hand as","Drummers are loud, horrible people who upset every creature nearby. I snub her. | |
| You remain deliberately just out of Gillaine's reach as","Nola makes everyone uncomfortable. | |
| ""Oh, everyone's a writer these days, aren't they?"" Her smile is not just patronizing but also badly colored in, as if she has tried to make a cookie cut from dough appear bigger just by smudging it outward. ""So what exactly do you write? You're not just one of these…blag, blagger—what are they called?"" Nola's excess of wrist jewelry tinkles as she makes circles to indicate vaguery with her hands. | |
| ""It's bloggers, Mum."" Claire is sounding harrowed, and this ""party"" hasn't even started. Some of them are very good, and very relevant,"" she adds, casting Gillaine a glance and rolling her eyes about Nola. ""I'm sure Gillaine wouldn't say she was a writer if she wasn't.""","""Oh! I'm so sorry. Wine?"" Andre interjects with suspicious urgency. ""Gillaine, since you're the first, come help me choose one!""", | |
| cat,Baska Kowac,"['Baska', 'Baska Kowac', 'Kowac']",130,10160,"01_newhome_703,02_bene_1739,03_maddox_703,03_maddox_723,03_maddox_743,03_maddox_829,03_maddox_873,03_maddox_843,03_maddox_876,03_maddox_806,03_maddox_1078,03_maddox_1120,03_maddox_1172,03_maddox_1027,03_maddox_1080,03_maddox_1174,03_maddox_1227,03_maddox_1084,03_maddox_1090,03_maddox_1098,03_maddox_1116,03_maddox_1143,03_maddox_1186,03_maddox_1102,03_maddox_1108,03_maddox_1151,03_maddox_1462,03_maddox_1004,03_maddox_1396,03_maddox_3107,03_maddox_3110,03_maddox_1298,03_maddox_1370,03_maddox_1616,04_familytension_1653,04_familytension_1711,07_invitesonly_986,07_invitesonly_1887,08_theparty_317,08_theparty_289,08_theparty_309,08_theparty_334,08_theparty_6960,08_theparty_6951,08_theparty_6846,08_theparty_6765,08_theparty_6771,09_inthenews_828,09_inthenews_2154,09_inthenews_2154,09_inthenews_1549,09_inthenews_2201,09_inthenews_2210,09_inthenews_2256,09_inthenews_2259,09_inthenews_1742,09_inthenews_4872,09_inthenews_4697,09_inthenews_2000,09_inthenews_2000,09_inthenews_2004,07_invitesonly_950,07_invitesonly_1866,07_invitesonly_1892,08_theparty_293,08_theparty_6813,08_theparty_7185,08_theparty_6769,08_theparty_6907,09_inthenews_666,09_inthenews_2265,09_inthenews_4438,09_inthenews_1759,09_inthenews_1761,09_inthenews_1763,09_inthenews_1920,09_inthenews_2570,09_inthenews_2570,09_inthenews_2628,09_inthenews_2640,09_inthenews_2642,09_inthenews_2642,09_inthenews_2654,08_theparty_11875,08_theparty_12074,08_theparty_12034,08_theparty_12044,07_invitesonly_4168,07_invitesonly_4099,07_invitesonly_4087,07_invitesonly_4074,06_dinner_2799,05_bigdecision_1822,05_bigdecision_1901,04_familytension_3072,04_familytension_3078,04_familytension_2509,04_familytension_2519,04_familytension_2523,04_familytension_2280,04_familytension_2285,03_maddox_2013,03_maddox_2026,03_maddox_2018,03_maddox_2022,03_maddox_1880,03_maddox_1938,03_maddox_1893,03_maddox_1903,03_maddox_1908,03_maddox_1918,03_maddox_1928,03_maddox_1944,03_maddox_1950,03_maddox_1959,03_maddox_1963,03_maddox_1971,03_maddox_1985,03_maddox_1843,03_maddox_1854,03_maddox_1790,03_maddox_1797,03_maddox_1755,03_maddox_1765,03_maddox_1770,03_maddox_1719,03_maddox_1727,03_maddox_1698,03_maddox_1814,03_maddox_1823","The luxury of this place is certainly not lost on you. Even the wood of the coffee table matches the walnut inlays on the furniture. The furniture itself matches the curtains—the whole room a meticulous harmony of maroon and cream and wood. You wonder what it is these two do to have managed such a comfortable place. | |
| ""Shall I tell you about my day?"" Claire mumbles from the couch. She is, in fact, talking to you. ""My day was terrible. I lost support from Baska for the party-leadership campaign. Can you believe that? She was the one who put me forward!"" | |
| For a moment you wonder if she might really want a reply, but you figure it's more a rhetorical tirade. | |
| ""If I didn't have Magda on PR, I think I'd chuck politics altogether. You have no idea what reporters will do with your words, Stinky."" She shakes her head, her tidy, androgynous crop growing ever more hedgehoggy now that she can relax. ""Seriously, it's an all-out war now that Helen has resigned. After today, I wouldn't be surprised if Baska plans to run for the leadership herself."" | |
| You hear thuds overhead as you listen to unprompted recollections. Andre and Moon are doing whatever it is that people do to amuse their children. It dawns on you that there is also an upstairs to explore. You purr to yourself, and Claire laughs. | |
| ""So I'm not the only one who likes the sound of my voice? Fantastic!"" She holds out a hand in your direction, in that way humans do when they want you to come to them.","The two of them have started talking about music when you hear the front door open. The rustle of shopping bags announces Claire's arrival, along with a very hurried ""OK, we have cat food! I'm Skyping with Baska on the education package in a few, so would you mind unpacking for me? Andre?"" | |
| Moon races off at once to greet her mother. You hear a muffled flood of preschool tales out in the hall as the men in the living room carry on, oblivious. | |
| ""Now the thing is,"" Helmut says, waving a finger at Andre, ""it's all about infrastructure these days. Back in the days of, say…"" He pauses, shutting his eyes like it might help remember through the whiskey. ""Hell. What was that you were hacking away at the other day?"" | |
| Andre looks suddenly deflated. | |
| ""It was…Guns N' Roses!"" Helmut says. ""Good times! Back then we could rely on the cost of recording and video to block out the little guys."" | |
| He turns his head briefly as Moon skips back in, arms wrapped around a fresh, thick block of drawing paper. | |
| ""But now,"" Helmut continues, ""[i]now[/i] you gotta control the delivery mechanisms to keep 'em shut out. Own [i]that[/i], and you [i]are[/i] music!"" He slaps his hands on his thighs like he's just reached the climax of the world's most gripping story. | |
| Andre nods his head gravely like he's listening to a sermon, not quite yet aware of the fact that Claire has come into the room, standing, arms folded, behind Helmut. | |
| ""Of course, some idiots still beat you with a gimmick,"" adds the red-clad CEO. ""Stuff going viral on the interweb and all. We'll get around to stopping that someday too…."" He trails off as Andre's face goes pale, turning around to see what might be distracting his captive, one-man audience. | |
| Claire's eyebrows are an angry V pointing right at Helmut. Her glowering is about to launch its arrows.","It's the most genuine sound you've heard from this sorry group so far, but it's cut off when you press the Restart key. | |
| ""You,"" Claire snaps, ""are going over here."" She half-flings you toward the farthest, most cluttered end of the study. ""Don't even think about trying to rattle me. I will not be rattled!"" | |
| The Skype tune joins in like a badly chosen soundtrack, and she turns back to the screen. | |
| ""Apologies for that, everyone,"" she says, looking across her notes quickly. ""I think that my little experiment with upping the literacy rate of cats has just proved itself a failure."" | |
| A mix of both stilted and possibly genuine laughter buzzes in the speakers. Carefully, you sneak a bit closer, just enough to see and hear properly. Baska is running a finger across an eyebrow. You wonder if the sensation of it is anything like those people who lose limbs but often report they still feel them.","Your blurry form crosses the screen of each viewer, landing with your tail still in the shot. Khaled's laugh sounds like an eight-year-old's giggle—which at least means it probably isn't fake. | |
| ""A cat?"" Baska sounds surprised. It's one of the few times her emotional state is close to the expression on her face. | |
| ""Yes, he's brand-new,"" Claire responds, ""A rescue from the shelter down the road."" As her hand skims over your fur, you can tell she's getting a nice big dose of calm. She is also getting kudos from some of these people. | |
| ""Is getting a cat a good idea?"" Baska inquires. ""You've got a dog already."" She says it like putting the two together is some kind of tasteless misdemeanor—like smearing a neighbor's door with cat shit while also not wearing any gloves. | |
| Claire deals with her as quickly as she can. ""Bene's mostly Labrador. He's fine. The important thing was doing our part to house neglected animals, as I'm sure you'll understand. Now."" She looks intently at the camera, dragging you into her lap to make it quite clear how much she looks after you.","Claire jumps in her seat when you suddenly appear atop the very thing she's relying on to run this meeting. It's not helped by the fact that Baska laughs. Claire hauls you into her lap to prevent any further misdemeanors, spilling the whole pile of paper that her meeting notes were perched on. | |
| ""Shit."" | |
| ""Are you all right, Claire?"" asks Mike. His bland features shift into concern. | |
| ""I'm fine,"" she says, agitated. ""Stinky just decided he needed to be the center of attention."" She leans over sideways, one hand around you and the other one sifting through paper. By the time she extracts her scribbled jottings, the others are looking impatient.", | |
| cat,Mummy,"['Mum', 'Mummy']",65,10160,"01_newhome_161,01_newhome_150,01_newhome_393,03_maddox_50,05_bigdecision_1534,05_bigdecision_1559,06_dinner_41,06_dinner_223,06_dinner_254,06_dinner_241,06_dinner_359,06_dinner_553,06_dinner_553,06_dinner_886,06_dinner_647,06_dinner_778,06_dinner_627,07_invitesonly_3303,08_theparty_1798,08_theparty_1969,08_theparty_1976,08_theparty_1998,08_theparty_2016,08_theparty_2030,08_theparty_1919,08_theparty_2108,08_theparty_1949,08_theparty_4335,08_theparty_4360,09_inthenews_120,09_inthenews_1147,09_inthenews_1572,09_inthenews_2098,09_inthenews_2103,09_inthenews_2063,08_theparty_1961,08_theparty_1853,08_theparty_2330,09_inthenews_1759,08_theparty_6103,08_theparty_6111,08_theparty_8576,07_invitesonly_4192,07_invitesonly_4053,06_dinner_3302,06_dinner_3355,06_dinner_3364,06_dinner_3737,06_dinner_3117,06_dinner_3145,06_dinner_3167,06_dinner_2128,06_dinner_2233,06_dinner_2307,06_dinner_2274,06_dinner_1638,06_dinner_1993,06_dinner_1848,06_dinner_4055,05_bigdecision_1952,05_bigdecision_1955,05_bigdecision_1959,05_bigdecision_1962,01_newhome_2093,01_newhome_2126","Lean out toward Claire and nuzzle her arm as thanks for opening the box. | |
| Claire's hands are smooth, and she smells of musky perfume. As she massages your head, you nuzzle the fabric of her suit, powerhouse black with a dark blue trim. The kid stares at you with a mute blend of fear and fascination. Claire is clearly knowledgable about how cats like to be stroked, and you give her a purr to reinforce her good behavior. | |
| ""Check it out, Moon, honey,"" Andre says to the child. ""I think Mum's the favorite so far."" Andre looks a little guilty, and follows this up with ""I'm sorry for leaving you in the box, puss."" | |
| He leaves off his riffing to pet you too, looking genuinely apologetic.","Let her pick me up. If they're genuine about befriending me, I appreciate it. | |
| Claire's hands are smooth, and she smells expensive. Both could be bad signs, but she knows what to do with those hands. As she massages your head like an expert, you purr to reinforce her good behavior. She puts you on the floor quite gently, brushing your hair from her immaculate suit without complaint. Moon is still wide-eyed with apprehension, peering at you from behind her dad's back. | |
| ""Aw, see, honey?"" Andre says to his daughter reassuringly. ""The puss likes cuddles. It's OK."" Moon doesn't actually answer, but her broad lips curve almost to a smile. | |
| Claire takes Moon's other hand and leads the still unconvinced child to sit on the carpet with her in front of the giant telly. | |
| ""The kitty cat had no home, so Mum and Dad thought that it might be able to stay here,"" she explains, stroking Moon's plump fingers. Andre nods in confirmation, brushing lanky hair out of his eyes. He leaves Claire with Moon and slumps into his armchair, facing the blank-screened telly. He looks tired, though the view of his wife and child and brand-new pet has definitely lifted his spirits.","""'Cause it smashed Auntie Gladys."" Moon beams at her mother, enamored with her own flawless logic. Claire glances at you, then at Andre. Her expression isn't one you understand. | |
| ""Andre?"" she defers. | |
| ""Mmm?"" Andre flicks lank hair out of his eyes. | |
| ""Moon would like to call the cat Smash, because of what happened with the photo."" Claire looks at him expectantly. | |
| Andre's face contorts, puzzled, like he knows this might be a trick question, but has no idea of what the trick could be. | |
| ""I'm just not sure I want Mum or Gladys asking Moon about why she chose the name,"" Claire elaborates. | |
| Andre nods. ""Good point.""","You are left alone with Moon for the brief few minutes it takes Andre to head through the kitchen toward the garden. You wonder what interesting stuff might be out there in that garden shed, apart from Maddox. Mice, if you're lucky. Spiders at the least. You hear the lever on the back door pull and slide. Closer by, you hear the clatter and click of bits of Lego. | |
| ""Finished!"" Moon shouts, jumping up and waving her hands triumphantly. She looks about for Mum or Dad, limbs sagging when she notices them gone. She casts one look at you and | |
| ""Right here, love!"" calls Andre, shutting the kitchen door behind him and dashing straight into the living room. | |
| ""Look, look, Dad!"" Moon enthuses, waving her arms again in the reassuring presence of her father. ""It's a castle."" | |
| This is obviously a kid with a serious imagination. Small, plump hands drag hairy adult male ones over to a corner of the room. Amid a multicolored mess of bricks and crayons is a very squat, windowless, roofless cube. | |
| Andre makes a fuss about how great this is while you decide instead to chew your paw. There's a big grain of dirt beneath your talons you're bent on removing with your teeth, given the limited number of things that might amuse you currently. You stop when Andre switches on the telly. | |
| ""Moon, love, it's time for your program,"" he reminds her. Moon skips up on the couch. ""Just for half an hour, OK?"" her father adds. ""I'll be in to turn it off when it's finished."" | |
| Moon nods, swinging her feet over the edge of the sofa to the rhythm of the opening tune. She grabs a cushion and hugs it, a lot like she's seen her mum do. | |
| ""I'll just be in the kitchen if you need me,"" Andre says, although it isn't really necessary. Moon is engrossed in her program, whose main character is a turtle called Franklin who can somehow ride a bike. | |
| ""And now to you, Stinky."" Andre makes for you cautiously, thick fingers stretching toward you, aiming for your ribcage. ""Come on, time to meet a new playmate.""","Claire appears, eyes ablaze, in Andre's doorway. ""Today just got much worse,"" she starts, as Bene bounds in. Moon barges in straight after, squirming around her mum to get inside. | |
| ""Daddy! Grandma's bringing me a present!"" She throws herself at Andre, arms outstretched. Bene joins the assault, leaping up on Andre with his front paws, not wanting to miss out on the affection. | |
| ""There you have it,"" Claire says, letting out a bitter laugh. ""My mother just invited herself for dinner. Ain't it grand?"" Her smile is fake as cheese from a tube. | |
| Andre tries desperately to coordinate his insufficient number of limbs to cuddle both his daughter and his dog. ""That's, uh, great, love!"" he says, clearly unable to juggle thinking and cuddling. | |
| Claire's nostrils flair. ""Yup, it's just [i]great[/i]. Moon, you need to know it's rude to like someone just because they bring you presents,"" she snaps, before she turns and leaves the room. | |
| Andre manages to arrange both child and dog on either side of him, so he can stroke both hair and fur at the same time. | |
| ""Don't worry about Mummy,"" he tells his daughter. ""I'm sure everything will be just fine, and I'll make us something yummy.""", | |
| cat,Turlough,['Turlough'],60,10160,"08_theparty_2731,08_theparty_2741,08_theparty_2765,08_theparty_2771,08_theparty_2814,08_theparty_2848,08_theparty_2991,08_theparty_2942,08_theparty_2980,08_theparty_2876,08_theparty_2919,08_theparty_2959,08_theparty_2800,08_theparty_2836,08_theparty_2896,08_theparty_2898,08_theparty_2925,08_theparty_3021,08_theparty_3365,08_theparty_3035,08_theparty_3241,08_theparty_3055,08_theparty_3082,08_theparty_3123,08_theparty_3130,08_theparty_3145,08_theparty_3250,08_theparty_3846,08_theparty_3873,08_theparty_3483,08_theparty_3881,08_theparty_3886,08_theparty_3981,08_theparty_3937,08_theparty_3945,08_theparty_3962,08_theparty_4007,08_theparty_4011,08_theparty_3956,08_theparty_4097,08_theparty_3782,08_theparty_3785,08_theparty_4250,08_theparty_4367,08_theparty_3546,08_theparty_4415,08_theparty_4285,08_theparty_4424,08_theparty_4542,08_theparty_2997,08_theparty_2872,08_theparty_2874,08_theparty_3031,08_theparty_3301,08_theparty_3275,08_theparty_3948,08_theparty_4530,08_theparty_7787,08_theparty_8725,08_theparty_8628","Bene is still desperate to lick this man's face. When the crate is set down on the patio, he succeeds with flying colors. | |
| ""You always steal the first hug, eh, Bene?"" The man, whose name is Turlough, actually embraces the now ecstatic dog. He then allows his cheeks a wash in fresh saliva. ""Andre, you're next. Where are ya?"" | |
| Turlough disentangles from Bene and wipes his face along his sleeve. His grin, obscured by a fuzzy, mountain-man-style beard, has a Santa-like charisma. He has come bearing gifts, to his credit. He nods toward the plastic crate that houses floods of wires. | |
| ""Rest is in the car still. Hundred and fifty watts a side enough for ya?"" The redheaded man beams, striding toward Andre. He slaps him hard on the back while","""You're a star, Turlough,"" Andre says. His whole person seems to sparkle as the two men decouple from their embrace. ""Let me give you a hand."" | |
| ""Naw,"" the man called Turlough says, waving him off. ""I got it. Toussaint ain't far away, and you got guests!""","When Turlough returns, this time embracing a massive, amplifier-style box, he gives you a broad and friendly grin. | |
| ""Someone's up for some music,"" he says, bending carefully from the knee to put the speaker down. He winks at you. ""We'll play you something special, puss. Gotta wait till everyone's here and""—he nods toward where Claire and Andre are still having words—""everyone's calmed down a bit."" | |
| With that, he heads off to slap a hand on the backs of both Claire and Andre. His warm demeanor soothes them into heading back toward the tables with him. Claire, still not as calm as she makes out, pours herself more wine.","You'd be quite cute if you didn't have that air of snobbery about you. To anyone who bothers glancing over, it seems as if you've merely given up on uninteresting company. When Turlough returns, this time with a massive amplifier-style box, he ejects you from the crate. As you jog back toward","As you dive and thrash and dig your fangs into plastic casings, the feel of wrecking something is divine. The cables give, and not just in terms of that wonderful sensation when the shielding parts to make way for your teeth—they have [i]succumbed[/i]. | |
| Your fit of fury peters out. Your job is done, and Turlough's back with both his arms held tight around a giant speaker. He bends at the knees, setting it down near the box of ruined cables. | |
| ""Hey, puss,"" he says with a wink, not noting anything unusual. You are a cat perched on some things inside a box. It's very normal. You wash your paws as the big man moves off again to fetch a second massive speaker that will be useless without the wires.", | |
| cat,Riya,['Riya'],50,10160,"08_theparty_39,08_theparty_51,08_theparty_91,08_theparty_107,08_theparty_72,08_theparty_81,08_theparty_99,08_theparty_103,08_theparty_126,08_theparty_131,08_theparty_135,08_theparty_139,08_theparty_145,08_theparty_155,08_theparty_172,08_theparty_197,08_theparty_158,08_theparty_121,08_theparty_167,08_theparty_178,08_theparty_205,08_theparty_213,08_theparty_220,08_theparty_67,08_theparty_194,09_inthenews_3818,09_inthenews_3829,09_inthenews_3869,09_inthenews_3885,09_inthenews_3850,09_inthenews_3859,09_inthenews_3877,09_inthenews_3881,09_inthenews_3905,09_inthenews_3910,09_inthenews_3914,09_inthenews_3918,09_inthenews_3924,09_inthenews_3845,09_inthenews_3934,09_inthenews_3951,09_inthenews_3976,09_inthenews_3937,09_inthenews_3900,09_inthenews_3946,09_inthenews_3957,09_inthenews_3984,09_inthenews_3992,09_inthenews_3973,09_inthenews_3997","You are in the midst of a most terrifying bout of déjà vu. Around you, in this tight-shut space, everything vibrates and roars. In the panic this induces, you don't remember how you got here. All you know is today's breakfast was suspiciously fantastic. After that, you ended up inside this box. It's the same one you arrived at your new home in all those weeks back, and it smells of mildew and damp. | |
| When the car does finally stop, the growling engine stills and shudders. A door slams shut, and you're suddenly being swung, waved through the air back and forth via the happy, hurrying arms of Andre. | |
| The swinging stops. You feel something solid move in underneath you. It feels cool and very even. You're on the floor. | |
| ""You must be Andre."" | |
| The sound of strange voices wafts around outside your crate. | |
| ""I'm Riya, this is Niko. You want to let the cat out now?"" | |
| ""Oh, God. Yes!"" | |
| That last voice is Andre. There is a fumbling overhead, and bits of cardboard now fold out of one another. You sniff a bit. It's warm in here, and stuffy, and feels like a much bigger kind of box. This is dead air, and there's no source of natural light. Also there are two people you've never met before. | |
| ""Right. Hi—what's its name?"" the one called Riya asks, shaking her head. She looks extremely tired and harried. Her dark hair is half escaping from a bun. | |
| ""Stinky,"" says Andre, as the one called Niko starts rolling up a cable. ""Is this where we're setting up?""","You're in a studio. You know this because Andre's making comments on how he's never seen one that's quite like it. The walls have bristles—lots of spongy, dark gray pyramids that look like they would be quite good for claws. There are other curious objects too, like a poorly thought-through window that's been built in the wrong wall. Instead of seeing the outside through it, you see rows of blinking lights. A massive mixing desk fills the room on the other side. | |
| Riya scratches her forehead. ""Niko, set Andre up in here. When we're done, we'll get Stinky into the vocal booth. Or try.""","I emerge gracefully, then await instruction, to show I'm a professional. | |
| You hop once, neatly, looking up at Riya. She nods approvingly and turns to leave. ""At least he's not flipping out…yet,"" she mutters as she exits. | |
| You get to sniff around the room a bit as Andre messes around. There are a lot of amps to jump on, and various cylinders of foam set up in corners.","I pretend I'm ill from the car trip. Guilt will help me run this situation. | |
| You jump once, all neat and tidy. Once you land you sway a little, and let out a small, pained noise. Riya's unmoved. ""Good. Looks like he might behave himself then,"" she announces, before heading toward the door.","Riya, aside from having more contempt than you do, clearly doesn't have a clue on how cats tick. | |
| ""Is your cat constipated or what?"" she asks Andre, looking unimpressed and making for the door. ""Just tip him out, please. I don't have time to mess around."" | |
| It's pretty rude, considering you've already had a nasty car trip, but Andre does exactly as he's told. | |
| The drop looks ungainly. You're too close to the ground to give you time to turn and land feetfirst. You land in an uncatly heap, then straighten up, blinking at the artificial lights above your head. You sniff around as Andre sets up his guitar things.", | |
| cat,Toussaint,['Toussaint'],48,10160,"08_theparty_2991,08_theparty_2999,08_theparty_3009,08_theparty_3021,08_theparty_3365,08_theparty_3035,08_theparty_3042,08_theparty_3082,08_theparty_3130,08_theparty_3145,08_theparty_3250,08_theparty_3111,08_theparty_3143,08_theparty_3346,08_theparty_3873,08_theparty_3937,08_theparty_3907,08_theparty_4011,08_theparty_7366,08_theparty_7384,08_theparty_7372,08_theparty_4277,08_theparty_7346,08_theparty_7375,08_theparty_7378,08_theparty_4285,08_theparty_7350,08_theparty_7354,08_theparty_4431,09_inthenews_783,08_theparty_3031,08_theparty_3373,08_theparty_7344,08_theparty_4282,08_theparty_4444,08_theparty_7860,08_theparty_7862,08_theparty_7873,08_theparty_7878,08_theparty_7883,08_theparty_5646,08_theparty_5788,08_theparty_5783,08_theparty_5963,08_theparty_8099,08_theparty_8267,08_theparty_12700,08_theparty_12712","Not more than one minute later, you hear the music stop abruptly. Some of the guests look around, surprised. A sudden, louder blast of notes elicits smiles and resuming conversation. The title's one they know before the lyrics kick in. ""Raspberry Beret,"" you hear them say in conversation, written by a man who knew no letters of the alphabet and resorted to just making up his own. | |
| ""Toussaint!"" Turlough's booming voice rises up over the music. ""That your way of making an entrance these days?"" | |
| A tall, dark man appears in the doorway to the kitchen. ""Guilty as charged!"" he says proudly. ""Come here, bass man!"" | |
| There is another round of back slapping, which Turlough clearly wins again, if the sounds of ""Oof"" and ""Go easy, man"" are anything to go by. Toussaint is built like Andre, tall and lanky, but with short, curly hair and a confident manner.","""Where's Gillaine?"" Toussaint peers through the crowd awaiting the final band member.","In the midst of all the nattering, Toussaint suddenly turns to Andre. He points a finger, clicking it and smirking. | |
| ""You know, I saw a thing today with your name on it,"" he says, leaning back and chuckling warmly.","Andre looks each of his former bandmates in the eye in turn. They fall silent as you wind your way around big Turlough's legs. | |
| ""I have some news,"" he faux whispers. | |
| ""Spit it out then"" and ""Come on, Dre,"" echo around him as he flaps his hands to make them keep their voices down. | |
| ""OK, OK. I have a deal,"" he says, beaming. ""As in a [i]record[/i] deal. With the Music Factory, no less."" | |
| There is a brief silence, followed by a varied set of cries. Turlough enthuses that this is fantastic. Toussaint's face folds up as if Bene had just crapped on his shoe. | |
| ""You're not just kidding around?"" he presses Andre. | |
| ""Nope. Though technically it's a single, and it's thanks to this one here."" Andre gestures with his thumb at you. ""Say hi, Stinky."" | |
| Toussaint folds his arms and mutters, ""You know those guys fuck bands for breakfast. Let me guess, was it just monetizing? Or some wholesale digital-rights ripoff?"" | |
| Andre looks stunned for a minute, but Turlough jumps in to keep it cheerful. ""You know what's important?"" He turns a full circle with a beer in his hand, looking each one of his bandmates in the eye. ""What's important is to give Andre and Stinky a round of applause.""","You were engaged in other observations when Toussaint and Andre split from the rest. You watch the nervous man, Maurice, work up the courage to introduce himself. It's rather like observing someone trying to cross a road in heavy traffic. He launches himself forward when the topic moves to gear tech, which he clearly knows a lot about. He and Turlough talk and laugh, drowning your usually strong faculties in jargon that relates to music software. The sheer number of incomprehensible and pointless syllables", | |
| cat,Khaled,['Khaled'],25,10160,"03_maddox_692,03_maddox_723,03_maddox_831,03_maddox_1027,03_maddox_1033,03_maddox_1186,03_maddox_1019,03_maddox_1370,03_maddox_2026,03_maddox_2022,03_maddox_1908,03_maddox_1918,03_maddox_1928,03_maddox_1959,03_maddox_1971,03_maddox_1843,03_maddox_1854,03_maddox_1797,03_maddox_1755,03_maddox_1765,03_maddox_1770,03_maddox_1698,03_maddox_1814,01_newhome_2187,01_newhome_2195","I'm bored. Walk across Claire's keyboard to show her I matter more than this meeting. | |
| You bound from the floor to Claire's thigh and then to the desktop. The latter is a skillful maneuver, considering the state of her workspace. She makes a failed attempt to grab you, and you vault a cup of dried-out pens to reach your destination. | |
| When the word ""@muv5x3a"" appears in the chat (and your bobbing tail and ass in the main window), the man called Khaled laughs.","Your blurry form crosses the screen of each viewer, landing with your tail still in the shot. Khaled's laugh sounds like an eight-year-old's giggle—which at least means it probably isn't fake. | |
| ""A cat?"" Baska sounds surprised. It's one of the few times her emotional state is close to the expression on her face. | |
| ""Yes, he's brand-new,"" Claire responds, ""A rescue from the shelter down the road."" As her hand skims over your fur, you can tell she's getting a nice big dose of calm. She is also getting kudos from some of these people. | |
| ""Is getting a cat a good idea?"" Baska inquires. ""You've got a dog already."" She says it like putting the two together is some kind of tasteless misdemeanor—like smearing a neighbor's door with cat shit while also not wearing any gloves. | |
| Claire deals with her as quickly as she can. ""Bene's mostly Labrador. He's fine. The important thing was doing our part to house neglected animals, as I'm sure you'll understand. Now."" She looks intently at the camera, dragging you into her lap to make it quite clear how much she looks after you.","With a lightning-quick leap onto the keyboard, you knock the whole thing to the floor. As Claire scrabbles for you angrily, you vault from her reach. The keyboard is lying upside down. You give thanks to the little feline gods of good fortune and pounce on its smooth plastic underside, which has the effect of pressing nearly all the buttons at once. | |
| ""For fuck's sake!"" hollers Claire as her screen goes blank. She scoops you off the keyboard and takes the thing carefully in her hands. It isn't broken, and she seems grateful for small mercies. She still jumps when her cell phone rings suddenly. | |
| ""Magda, I'm sorry, the bloody cat just decided to jump on the keyboard,"" she says into the phone, trying to calm herself down. ""Oh. No, I didn't think of that."" She pauses. ""Not a bad idea. I did get a funny sort of feeling about her attitude."" | |
| Claire gives you an odd look as she sets her keyboard up again. It's no longer anger, but there is a lot of wariness. The sounds of her machine booting up compete with the end of Magda's call. | |
| ""Yep, logging back in now,"" she says. ""Good call, Magda. I should probably be grateful for unruly household pets!"" | |
| When the faces show back up on her screen, there are only three of them—Mike, Khaled, and Magda, the latter of whom says, ""Hello. How's the cat?""","The muscles in Claire's jaw tighten. She's already struggling to hide the flicker of absolute rage that Baska has unleashed in her. She can't speak, lest she use words that start with C and F, but her hand comes out to encase your paw and place it back gently on her leg. She strokes you mechanically, like her hand is under the orders of some clumsy android arm. | |
| ""Good puss,"" she says through gritted teeth, and you raise your head into her palm, turning your cheek through her fingers to increase your tactile satisfaction. Khaled and Magda make admiring noises—probably mostly in the hopes that this will keep Claire stroking you and give her some semblance of calm.","There's a lot to be said for having to live up to one's own image. Annoying as you are, Claire can't afford to look angry in front of her colleagues. When she scrunches up her face and leans away, you bat at her a second time—softly, with no claws out. She closes a hand around your paw and places it gently on her thigh. The strokes that you wanted ensue. | |
| ""Good puss,"" Claire says through gritted teeth. | |
| ""Cute,"" mutters Magda, without much feeling. Khaled might be throwing you a smile, though, and you try to purr enough for him to hear. There's a good enough level of acknowledgment, you feel, as Claire continues stroking like a robot.", | |
| cat,Mike,['Mike'],22,10160,"03_maddox_737,03_maddox_743,03_maddox_831,03_maddox_876,03_maddox_806,03_maddox_1186,03_maddox_1469,03_maddox_1370,03_maddox_2026,03_maddox_2022,03_maddox_1908,03_maddox_1918,03_maddox_1928,03_maddox_1971,03_maddox_1985,03_maddox_1843,03_maddox_1854,03_maddox_1797,03_maddox_1755,03_maddox_1770,03_maddox_1698,03_maddox_1814","Claire jumps in her seat when you land suddenly on the very prop she was using to fake some composure. Her surprise turns to fear when it occurs to her you might walk on the keyboard. She hauls you into her lap to prevent any further surprises. | |
| ""Are you all right, Claire?"" asks Mike. His bland features shift into concern. | |
| ""I'm fine,"" she sighs, getting ahold of herself. ""It's just Stinky.""","Claire jumps in her seat when you suddenly appear atop the very thing she's relying on to run this meeting. It's not helped by the fact that Baska laughs. Claire hauls you into her lap to prevent any further misdemeanors, spilling the whole pile of paper that her meeting notes were perched on. | |
| ""Shit."" | |
| ""Are you all right, Claire?"" asks Mike. His bland features shift into concern. | |
| ""I'm fine,"" she says, agitated. ""Stinky just decided he needed to be the center of attention."" She leans over sideways, one hand around you and the other one sifting through paper. By the time she extracts her scribbled jottings, the others are looking impatient.","With a lightning-quick leap onto the keyboard, you knock the whole thing to the floor. As Claire scrabbles for you angrily, you vault from her reach. The keyboard is lying upside down. You give thanks to the little feline gods of good fortune and pounce on its smooth plastic underside, which has the effect of pressing nearly all the buttons at once. | |
| ""For fuck's sake!"" hollers Claire as her screen goes blank. She scoops you off the keyboard and takes the thing carefully in her hands. It isn't broken, and she seems grateful for small mercies. She still jumps when her cell phone rings suddenly. | |
| ""Magda, I'm sorry, the bloody cat just decided to jump on the keyboard,"" she says into the phone, trying to calm herself down. ""Oh. No, I didn't think of that."" She pauses. ""Not a bad idea. I did get a funny sort of feeling about her attitude."" | |
| Claire gives you an odd look as she sets her keyboard up again. It's no longer anger, but there is a lot of wariness. The sounds of her machine booting up compete with the end of Magda's call. | |
| ""Yep, logging back in now,"" she says. ""Good call, Magda. I should probably be grateful for unruly household pets!"" | |
| When the faces show back up on her screen, there are only three of them—Mike, Khaled, and Magda, the latter of whom says, ""Hello. How's the cat?""","You make a sneaky jump onto the desk, sidling up to the screen as Claire's face collapses in a frown. Baska, encouraged by your sudden appearance, lets out an ""Aww"" of fake delight. Claire's hands close around your ribs. | |
| ""Let's have a decent look at him,"" Baska suggests, and you're held up like a limp sack of laundry by your grumbling owner. The others seem to think they should admire you. You are, after all, their possible future boss's cat. It may also give Baska forced closure on this topic. | |
| ""I do think we should be moving on,"" says Mike as politely as possible, once you're down in Claire's lap. ""As much as, uh, Stinky, is a fine specimen."" | |
| Claire strokes you—more for the sake of keeping you out of trouble than because she genuinely wants to. All the same, pets got more airtime in the conversation, and Baska got to know that you appreciate her.","You then flaunt your form, tail bobbing back and forth in view of the camera. The man called Mike raises his eyebrows—an expression that has some actual meaning on him. | |
| ""Are you all right there, Claire?"" Baska drawls. | |
| Claire scans Baska's face like a fox who's been locked out of a henhouse. The key to this woman is elusive, and she's certainly not to be trusted. Claire's fingers move over your skull, massaging it slowly like she's drawing on some dark and arcane magic. | |
| You do get some ""Oohs"" and ""Very cutes,"" but then Baska asks a question that's anathema to Claire: ""Not a purebred, of course, I'm assuming?"" | |
| ""You have to be kidding,"" Claire says. She mollycoddles you further, as if your very existence proved a point. ""Why would you even ask that?"" | |
| Baska waves her hand, like she's trying to erase what she said. She's one of those people who says things like ""Oh, I wouldn't use the word X"" in order to actually use the word. ""Oh, it's nothing. You're right, stupid question!"" | |
| ""Stinky is not an expensive inbred, brought into this world by people who see animals as money, no."" Claire's skin has gone warmer to the touch. | |
| Magda jumps in. ""Baska, we'd be wise to move on. Rakenstad, everyone?""", | |
| cat,. Svenja,"['Svenja', '. Svenja']",20,10160,"02_bene_650,06_dinner_390,06_dinner_393,06_dinner_399,07_invitesonly_1774,07_invitesonly_1817,07_invitesonly_2124,07_invitesonly_3251,07_invitesonly_3255,07_invitesonly_3263,07_invitesonly_3267,07_invitesonly_3288,07_invitesonly_3296,07_invitesonly_3409,08_theparty_1148,08_theparty_1151,09_inthenews_1356,07_invitesonly_3274,07_invitesonly_3276,07_invitesonly_3286","When your dream fades, it is replaced by the reality of a stressful-sounding discussion between Claire and Andre. Claire's face is strained, and she's leaning, arms folded, on the flat-top stove. | |
| ""This whole thing…I mean, I've never missed saying goodbye to Moon before!"" she says, shaking her head. ""I don't want to be one of those mums whose kid sees their nanny more than their own family."" | |
| ""She loves Svenja,"" Andre assures her, putting his hands on her shoulders and rubbing them gently. ""It was fine."" | |
| Claire meets his eyes and lets out a long deep breath.","""We mostly…slept through it,"" says Magda, as Claudette turns pink. Nola clears her throat and starts arranging her cutlery intently. | |
| ""How is Svenja working out?"" Nola asks as you slip between feet and wooden chair legs. They talk about Moon's nanny as","""I'm glad I slept through it,"" says Magda. ""One of the advantages of not having kids."" | |
| Nola cannot wait for her two cents' worth. ""Well, you don't have to look after them yourself. Claire here farms that out to—what's her name?"" | |
| Claire sighs, twirling the stem of her wineglass. ""Svenja. Do you think you could pour me a [i]massive[/i] glass of wine, love?"" she asks Andre. Magda quietly waves her glass at him too, and mouths, ""Please."" | |
| Nola continues with her tirade. ""I think that women want too much these days, and it's always the children who suffer,"" she continues. ""Back in my day…"" | |
| Nola's voice scratches on as Andre hunts hard for the bottle opener. On finding one, he asks, ""A chardonnay? What do you think?"" and receives two enthusiastic nods from Claire and Magda. The conversation sinks back into purging pointless thoughts—what kinds of wine there are and what countries each has visited to try them. You feel your whiskers twitching as","""Oh, just dreadful,"" Nola says with a frown as Moon plays with her fork, poking the tines into the wooden top of the table. | |
| You can hardly blame Moon for finding other sources of amusement. Around both her and you, the conversation turns to Svenja, Moon's young nanny, and the places that provide the best quality childcare. Nola, unsurprisingly, takes on the role of expert as","lurking by the front door, waiting for the sound of her car. Upstairs, the sounds of Moon playing with her nanny, Svenja, echo", | |
| cat,Jesus Christ,"['Jesus', 'Christ', 'Jesus Christ']",19,10160,"02_bene_1008,02_bene_1008,02_bene_1335,02_bene_1281,02_bene_1611,03_maddox_799,04_familytension_4419,07_invitesonly_3303,07_invitesonly_3027,08_theparty_3937,08_theparty_4415,08_theparty_5852,08_theparty_4974,08_theparty_11982,08_theparty_11990,08_theparty_11344,06_dinner_2245,06_dinner_2326,06_dinner_1582","Outside of the kitchen, Andre is having a discussion with two women on the doorstep. They're extremely keen to sell him a religion, though you're sure he's already decided on one for himself, judging by the number of times you've heard him use the words ""God,"" ""Christ,"" and ""Jesus."" While his voice goes from patronizing to impatient, you turn your attention to Bene.","Outside of the kitchen, Andre is having a discussion with two women on the doorstep. They're extremely keen to sell him a religion, though you're sure he's already decided on one for himself, judging by the number of times you've heard him use the words ""God,"" ""Christ,"" and ""Jesus."" While his voice goes from patronizing to impatient, you turn your attention to Bene.","As Bene gives that tiny nod that indicates agreement, you leap onto the kitchen counter. | |
| The first thing to fall is some display-purpose cutlery hanging from a silver T. It clatters to the floor with the ring of steel on tile. Second is the stainless-steel brush holder. With maniacal speed, you bolt around in circles and would actually continue, but… | |
| ""What the hell are you doing?"" Andre wails. | |
| Mission accomplished. There's an air of incredulity to his voice, like you've overstepped some line into the realm of complete insanity. You get scraped up and carried to the laundry room, clearly the culprit and clearly quite disturbed. | |
| ""Christ knows where you got that behavior from,"" Andre says as he slams the door shut. | |
| You hop into the laundry basket and curl up, feeling tired but deeply smug. As you drift off to sleep, you hear sweeping sounds and swearing, none of which is aimed at your new slave, Bene.","He crouches in front of the cabinet under the sink. Cloths and squirty bottles bend their heads in his direction. He rummages, pulling on rubber gloves and grabbing a spongy scourer. There's a ""Jesus"" as he scoops up last night's Spam. You can only imagine how awful it will be when he gets to Moon's ""accident."" | |
| You stay well behind him, looking at Bene and shivering whenever Andre glances at you. Bene is probably as disgusted with you as Andre is cleaning up excrement. Slinking off to his basket, his eyes bore into you. It's the maddest you've seen him so far, which only plays into your ploy. | |
| ""You leave the poor cat alone,"" Andre says. ""You've done enough damage as it is. Ten minutes! That's how long I asked you to behave yourself! Ten minutes! Christ!"" He moves to grab a dustpan and brush and nearly steps on you. ""Aw, Stinky! I'm so sorry. Come here."" | |
| He takes off one glove, and you get strokes and affection. The red in his face drains away as he slides his hand slowly over your fur. He asserts your good-puss-ness, comparing you favorably to bad dog Bene. You suck it up while Bene looks chastised in his basket. He definitely likes you much less.","your claws push through the fabric of his jacket. You can feel the flesh beneath. | |
| ""Augh!"" the man hollers as you scrabble right up to his throat. | |
| Andre is horrified. Helmut continues his hollering, swatting at you with his eyes shut like you're some giant bee. Of course, a bee would have more trouble blinding this man than you would—if it weren't for Andre. He pulls you off before you get the chance. | |
| ""Jesus Christ, I'm so sorry!"" he says, trying and failing to pacify the irate man. | |
| Helmut swats at him as well, the whole of his neck now the color of his suit. He looks like those cartoons of thermometers, where the red rises up right to the top and then expands at the head before exploding. | |
| ""You should have that bloody animal put down!"" shouts Helmut, holding a scratch on his neck like it's some mortal wound he has to stop from bleeding. You sit on the step, cleaning yourself nonchalantly as Bene's barking echoes in the background.", | |
| cat,Maurice Sendak,"['Maurice Sendak', 'Maurice']",18,10160,"04_familytension_5325,07_invitesonly_2143,08_theparty_2220,08_theparty_2236,08_theparty_3365,08_theparty_3120,08_theparty_3123,08_theparty_3130,08_theparty_3309,08_theparty_3483,08_theparty_3623,08_theparty_3546,08_theparty_3562,08_theparty_3337,08_theparty_3339,08_theparty_4005,08_theparty_4177,08_theparty_7787","[i]Where the Wild Things Are[/i] by Maurice Sendak. | |
| It's well known that human psyches house some grim and frightening concepts. Max, a dangerous child, possesses powers. His dance of death will bring subconscious horrors to the world, and yet he does it, just for fun, because he can. This self-centered desire does seem quite typical of children. Moon claps her hands and smiles up at her dad as he relays the gory details of this Max's stompy moves. | |
| When human adults pass on their ancient folklore, human children often completely miss the warnings they're supposed to learn. For example, when Max completes his summoning of mankind's most frightening elements, Moon happily requests another story from her dad.","""And Kyla and Maurice from school?"" Claire says. | |
| ""Yep, thanks,"" Andre replies. Claire scrawls three names and throws more paper in the bowl.","The lumbering dog, it would appear, has many friends: a short and bearded music teacher called Maurice, a manager called Aisha who used to share a flat with Andre, and some quiet sporty type who has a Frisbee in his bag. As a cat, you can tell just by their scent who is amenable to you, and who is not—and thus more fun to plague and goad. | |
| Maurice just likes dogs,","""So!"" shouts Maurice from the far edge of the paving stones. ""I heard something about a jam!"" | |
| Andre looks suddenly sheepish. Claire seems busy opening wine. | |
| ""Ah, later on, perhaps. When everyone is here,"" he answers a little too quietly. | |
| Maurice now looks confused. Claire, who seems to have heard nothing, is pouring wine into rows of glasses.","You were engaged in other observations when Toussaint and Andre split from the rest. You watch the nervous man, Maurice, work up the courage to introduce himself. It's rather like observing someone trying to cross a road in heavy traffic. He launches himself forward when the topic moves to gear tech, which he clearly knows a lot about. He and Turlough talk and laugh, drowning your usually strong faculties in jargon that relates to music software. The sheer number of incomprehensible and pointless syllables", | |
| cat,Mr. Smythe,"['Mr. Smythe', 'smythe', 'Smythe']",18,10160,"08_theparty_3238,08_theparty_3241,08_theparty_3123,08_theparty_3250,08_theparty_7032,08_theparty_7384,08_theparty_7189,09_inthenews_3784,09_inthenews_2870,09_inthenews_2881,09_inthenews_2885,09_inthenews_2706,09_inthenews_2718,09_inthenews_2674,09_inthenews_2677,08_theparty_10879,08_theparty_10870,08_theparty_10715","""If I'd known you'd be here, Mr. Smythe, I'd have made you my brandy fudge tart,"" Nola fawns, pouring him a generous glass of wine. | |
| Helmut manages a smile. Cradling his glass as if it were cognac, he takes a sip and looks around the crowd.","""You must be Smythe!"" Helmut is assaulted from behind by a very hefty back slap from Turlough. ""Always fancied meeting you, man. Let me get you a beer. Or are you more of a wine swine?"" He winks. | |
| There is a twinkle of mischief in Turlough's eye","An easy target. As he goes through the pretense of wanting yet another cracker, you wiggle your rump and wait for it to almost meet his lips. An open mouth, a stunning move—with grabbing claws and your best paralyzing yowl. Poor Maurice freezes. The food is gone before he knows he should be scared. | |
| ""Hellfire,"" Turlough mutters, as you drag your salmon cracker out of sight to eat at your own pleasure. ""That cat's got nerve. No wonder Mr. Smythe came out second best."" | |
| Rather unnerved, the four turn back toward each other, shutting out poor Maurice as he calms himself again.","Turlough pays a hurried leave to his musician conversation, patting Toussaint lightly on the shoulder as he goes. He winks back to them, stepping up to ""save"" Helmut from Andre's deadly in-law, a move he starts with such an amped-up back thump that Helmut almost cracks his own glass on his teeth. | |
| ""You must be Smythe!"" the redhead bellows as you edge a little closer toward Claire and Andre's secret huddle. They're just around the corner of the house now, where it's dark.","""Magda's said we should find a minute to put our heads together on sorting out something concrete. This stuff with Smythe and his cat, it's still going on, right?"" | |
| Claire nods emphatically, a mouthful of wine preventing her from using words.", | |
| cat,Niko,['Niko'],18,10160,"08_theparty_39,08_theparty_51,08_theparty_81,08_theparty_99,08_theparty_68,08_theparty_131,08_theparty_139,08_theparty_205,08_theparty_220,09_inthenews_3818,09_inthenews_3829,09_inthenews_3859,09_inthenews_3877,09_inthenews_3846,09_inthenews_3910,09_inthenews_3918,09_inthenews_3984,09_inthenews_3997","You are in the midst of a most terrifying bout of déjà vu. Around you, in this tight-shut space, everything vibrates and roars. In the panic this induces, you don't remember how you got here. All you know is today's breakfast was suspiciously fantastic. After that, you ended up inside this box. It's the same one you arrived at your new home in all those weeks back, and it smells of mildew and damp. | |
| When the car does finally stop, the growling engine stills and shudders. A door slams shut, and you're suddenly being swung, waved through the air back and forth via the happy, hurrying arms of Andre. | |
| The swinging stops. You feel something solid move in underneath you. It feels cool and very even. You're on the floor. | |
| ""You must be Andre."" | |
| The sound of strange voices wafts around outside your crate. | |
| ""I'm Riya, this is Niko. You want to let the cat out now?"" | |
| ""Oh, God. Yes!"" | |
| That last voice is Andre. There is a fumbling overhead, and bits of cardboard now fold out of one another. You sniff a bit. It's warm in here, and stuffy, and feels like a much bigger kind of box. This is dead air, and there's no source of natural light. Also there are two people you've never met before. | |
| ""Right. Hi—what's its name?"" the one called Riya asks, shaking her head. She looks extremely tired and harried. Her dark hair is half escaping from a bun. | |
| ""Stinky,"" says Andre, as the one called Niko starts rolling up a cable. ""Is this where we're setting up?""","You're in a studio. You know this because Andre's making comments on how he's never seen one that's quite like it. The walls have bristles—lots of spongy, dark gray pyramids that look like they would be quite good for claws. There are other curious objects too, like a poorly thought-through window that's been built in the wrong wall. Instead of seeing the outside through it, you see rows of blinking lights. A massive mixing desk fills the room on the other side. | |
| Riya scratches her forehead. ""Niko, set Andre up in here. When we're done, we'll get Stinky into the vocal booth. Or try.""","You hang on friable, luscious foam, then power upward, digging in and gaining height. This room might be an entertainment park for cats. | |
| ""Oh, great, a live one,"" Riya mutters with sarcasm. ""Still, I suppose it's more promising than shyness."" | |
| She leaves the room, and Andre plucks you from the wall without being asked to, which is rude. You try once more, but Riya comes back in with Niko. They're at either end of some ungainly, portable wall. They look at you, then at the pyramids of foam, and set it down. Access denied. It's like they've just shut down the Ferris wheel. | |
| ""Now calm down,"" Riya says, before stalking away and leaving you with all the inferior fun-park activities, like jumping up on amps to sniff them thoroughly, which is on par with a ghost train where the figures have pieces missing and even five-year-olds are not remotely scared.","They look like fatter, cushier versions of scratching posts. It's too much. Your mind reels with temptations: climbable walls, luxury scratching posts, expensive, mesh-front jungle gyms with knobs and luscious cords. It's really clear that this is set up like some cat amusement park. Only a feline so domesticated they practically weren't a cat could just ignore it. | |
| You go berserk, knowing that once you start, you'll be stopped again quite quickly. You want [i]all[/i] of it, a wild-child feline binge of destruction and fun. You vault a cylinder, clawing at the walls, then climbing them. | |
| Andre freaks. Niko just looks startled, until Riya races into the room. Both she and Andre chase you around for quite a while without success. Finally, you feel, at least, like you've had a taste of everything. You hide behind a cylinder and stay put for a while.","""Good. OK, Niko'll help you set up—he is house-trained, right?"" | |
| Andre nods as you explore a little, sniffing bits of gear.", | |
| cat,MP Claire Lassen,"['Claire Lassen', 'MP Claire Lassen']",15,10160,"04_familytension_1555,05_bigdecision_540,05_bigdecision_548,08_theparty_302,08_theparty_289,09_inthenews_2570,09_inthenews_2588,09_inthenews_2614,09_inthenews_2706,09_inthenews_2628,09_inthenews_2630,09_inthenews_2642,09_inthenews_2674,04_familytension_2509,04_familytension_1864","""Cute,"" announces Magda, tapping some button on her keyboard. A pinging sounds comes through the speakers. ""Just took a screen shot. Check it out."" | |
| You lose your fight at that point, in that Claire takes both your paws in her hands and places them firmly on her lap. You get strokes as some mix of compensation and assurance that you'll stay just where you are. | |
| ""I agree, though, that your approach will work in combination,"" Magda says matter-of-factly. ""How's that for you if we meet halfway?"" | |
| Magda's face vanishes briefly, replaced by an image of you licking Claire. Claire laughs. | |
| ""The look on my face!"" she says. | |
| Magda smiles, looking very self-satisfied. ""Not bad, eh? Very much the human side of Claire Lassen. So we're covering both bases at once."" It's more like an assertion than a question, and you settle down into Claire's lap, tuning out until the next important bit kicks in.","""It isn't great,"" she sighs. ""'Party representative Claire Lassen gave a statement on Friday calling for a halt to the proposed Rakenstad highway extension, yet she failed to outline workable alternatives. The extension aims at improving access to jobs in ComCorp's new plant in the Rakenstad area.'"" She shakes her head and turns the text to Andre. ""They didn't even mention the wetland reserve [i]or[/i] the fact that the extension is a way of avoiding spending on public transport."" | |
| ""Hon, you did your best,"" Andre offers, reaching out to stroke her hand. Claire squeezes it and reads on as he comments, ""One lost battle won't stop you from winning the rest."" You can't help but wonder if the same philosophy will apply to your bids to make this place yours. The suspense is not so comfy.","""It sounds like they're on board,"" she says with a smile. ""'Party representative Claire Lassen gave a statement on Friday drawing attention to both environmental and social oversights on the part of the two major parties in their Rakenstad highway-extension proposal.'"" She turns the text to face Andre. He leans across the table, chewing, while Moon scowls at her egg. | |
| ""You showed 'em, hon. I'm proud of you. Next step: party leader."" He winks as he digs into his yolk-drenched toast.","""Shit. This is bad."" You turn your head to see her clench her teeth, following the text with her index finger. ""'Claire Lassen, who was tipped as a favorite before the candidates were announced, has proved to be an uninspiring choice.'"" Her shoulders sag.","""Oh,"" she says flatly, as Andre finishes his coffee. ""This isn't great. 'Claire Lassen, while true to the idealism central to her party's appeal, still seems to lack charisma.'"" She throws the paper down and folds her arms. ""They didn't say [i]Baska[/i] lacked anything,"" she says, scowling as Andre grabs the paper and squints over tiny printed words. | |
| ""They said, 'The only other viable candidate seems to prefer dogs to people,'"" Andre offers, looking up. ""Not flattering either."" He reaches out to touch Claire's arm. ""They've never been on your side. Try and take the good bits from this. You're one of the two favorites, Claire. It's good.""", | |
| cat,God,['God'],14,10160,"04_familytension_3801,06_dinner_339,06_dinner_720,08_theparty_2334,08_theparty_6757,08_theparty_3560,09_inthenews_568,09_inthenews_1167,09_inthenews_2701,08_theparty_5783,08_theparty_12362,06_dinner_2307,06_dinner_2495,03_maddox_1814","He squints inside the netting from all angles. He gets out his car keys, which have a tiny flashlight. | |
| ""Well, thank God for that,"" he says after a minute. ""Looks like none of that actually got though. Great little amps, these!"" He smiles, as if your skill weren't what kept the thing from getting damaged. He flicks the red button of doom and, picking up his one true love, lets a chord ring out.","Claire mutters something under her breath, heading for the door. She inhales deeply before opening it. Her face tugs itself into a smile. | |
| ""Magda, Claudette, it's really great to see you!"" Despite the fake smile, Claire's voice has a genuine ring of relief. She ushers the pair into the hallway, taking coats and shoes and feeding them into the closet. | |
| Magda waves a rather pretty bottle and winks. ""I bought some Belvedere, in case we need it."" | |
| ""Thank God—I mean, fantastic!"" Claire casts a grateful look at Magda before turning her focus to her other guest. ""This is my mother, Nola."" | |
| Nola holds her hand out limply, like a queen who expects others only to caress it. Claudette is the first to actually take it, shaking it like there's hope she can resuscitate it. Moon moves to hide behind her mother.","massive rat. | |
| Claire shudders as Maddox dashes out of sight after his prey. ""Ew,"" she says. ""Thank God for Maddox. I didn't know we had rats that size in our garden."" Claire turns from the window, shooing you away too. | |
| ""Well, if you spend all day burying your nose in politics, you're hardly likely to know what's out there in the real world,"" Nola says.","Nola ignores the comment, taking the arm offered by Amir. He winks over his shoulder at Claire. Gillaine tries not to laugh. | |
| ""He's a smart guy. Thank God."" Claire breathes out in relief. ""May he get out of that as easily as","""We'd really like to see you embrace this. We'll emphasize the fact that you're against people using their status and resources to be above the law."" | |
| Claire pinches the bridge of her nose. ""Oh, God. That's such a can of worms, though."" | |
| The couple won't let go. ""We can't avoid this, Claire,"" Magda says, pursing her lips. ""You'll definitely get a ton of coverage. You've got a bunch of people thinking your cat is a hero already. What with them and Claudette's lot behind you—and they will be""—Claudette nods in agreement—""you might just have the edge."" | |
| Claire's discomfort has now shifted into terror. She takes a massive swig of wine.", | |
| cat,Mrs. Levy,"['Mrs. Levy', 'Levy']",12,10160,"09_inthenews_3623,09_inthenews_3635,09_inthenews_3793,09_inthenews_3794,09_inthenews_3797,08_theparty_5745,08_theparty_5788,08_theparty_10555,08_theparty_10566,08_theparty_10724,08_theparty_10725,08_theparty_10728","""I don't want the poor thing running scared into Helmut Smythe's garden. If he gets hold of him, he'll run off for good,"" Claudette says, holding you to her chest and massaging your ears. Her hands smell like vanilla, and you roll your head against her in thanks. | |
| The couple swap glances. | |
| ""I think that cat belongs to number fifty-one,"" the woman says, nodding toward your driveway. | |
| ""Thanks. Do you have pets, Mrs.…?"" Claudette inquires as the chanting increases in volume behind her. | |
| ""Levy,"" the woman says, shuffling a little. ""We had a cat, yes. Molly. She ran away. Which makes me wonder…""","You try to squiggle free, but Claudette won't let you. | |
| ""That's awful,"" Claudette says, turning back to the couple to empathize in tones you cannot help but find enchanting. ""You know, there will be a lot of other cats who suffer at Helmut's hands if they're curious enough to go into his garden—and, let's face it, most cats are curious."" | |
| The couple nod and exchange looks once again as Claudette folds you tighter to her chest—which, despite her mesmerizing voice, makes you want to jump away. ""Amos,"" Claudette says, turning back to the man who just came over. ""If you take over, I'll deal with the press. Does Chloe have extra signs for Mr. and Mrs. Levy? Looks like their cat Molly had a run-in with Helmut too."" She casts the pair an understanding gaze. | |
| The couple are entrusted with some matching yellow signs. Arm in arm, they follow Amos off into the crowd. | |
| ""OK, Stinky,"" Claudette whispers to you. ""We need to get you safely back inside, you little scamp!""","""We're talking to fellow residents Mr. and Mrs. Levy,"" she says into the microphone, her stare boring into the eye of the camera. ""What's your reaction to the claims against Smythe being made here?""","Mrs. Levy holds her sign a little higher, scrunching up her face at the mention of Helmut's name. | |
| ""Well, our Molly went missing,"" she shouts, prompting the anchor to pull back a little. ""We'd had her ten years, you know. My daughter used to…""","Mr. and Mrs. Levy link their arms. Mr. Levy raises his chin before saying, ""This used to be a quiet street, and now? Well, look."" He waves a hand sideways. ""All this noise and fuss and…and…hullabaloo. Don't these people have jobs to go to?""", | |
| cat,Beyoncé,['Beyoncé'],8,10160,"03_maddox_2331,03_maddox_2231,03_maddox_2270,03_maddox_2310,03_maddox_2282,03_maddox_2195,09_inthenews_4208,09_inthenews_4288","It only makes you hiss even louder. | |
| Moon waggles her feet like she wants to get down and run away. When it's clear that won't happen, she buries her face in Andre's shirt. | |
| ""I can see I've caught you at a bad time,"" Helmut starts, like he cares, ""but my hedge trimmer has decided to give up the ghost. I don't suppose you've got one I could borrow?"" | |
| ""You're a star,"" Helmut says, with one eye still on you. ""I wouldn't normally bother you, but I really need to do it this evening. I never know when I'm going to need to invite clients back and, you know, impress them."" Helmut actually looks uncomfortable by now, though it could just be because he's changed out of his suit. It's pretty hard to ooze superiority in mud-stained sweatpants and a Beyoncé T-shirt. | |
| ""Stay here,"" Andre says, nearly stepping on you as he turns. ""I'll be right back."" | |
| He herds you under the couch. You turn and stare out from underneath, still growling. Moon looks on, still scared. | |
| ""Can it, Stinky! Shit!"" Andre throws a stressed-out look at Helmut. | |
| ""Daddy, you said shit,"" Moon mumbles, finally distracted from her fear. Her father just ignores her. | |
| ""Could you keep an eye on these two?"" Andre asks.","It's pretty hard to ooze superiority in mud-stained sweatpants and a Beyoncé T-shirt. | |
| ""You'll have to keep an eye on these two, though,"" Andre says, raising his chin like it's a challenge.","The plus-size record mogul actually starts to look uncomfortable. You theorize he might be perceptive to Andre's cold reception. There's also the fact he has changed out of his suit, and it's pretty hard to exude superiority in mud-stained sweatpants and a Beyoncé T-shirt. | |
| ""Right, well, just stay put, OK?"" Andre turns and almost trips over you. ""And you'll have to keep an eye on the cat. He's not allowed outside for another few days, and the window is open."" He puts Moon down on the sofa before rushing away.","It's pretty hard to exude superiority in mud-stained sweatpants and a Beyoncé T-shirt. | |
| ""Right, I'll just…"" Andre turns and trips over you, which cuts you off midhiss. ""Shit. Can you keep an eye on Moon and the cat?","It's pretty hard to exude superiority in mud-stained sweatpants and a Beyoncé T-shirt. | |
| ""It's no problem at all. Just stay there and…"" Andre turns and almost trips over you. ""Ah, would you mind keeping an eye on the cat? He's not allowed outside for another few days, and the window is open."" He throws Helmut a lame smile and puts Moon down on the sofa before rushing away.", | |
| cat,Ruwai Hapi,"['Ruwai', 'Ruwai Hapi']",8,10160,"08_theparty_7003,08_theparty_7037,08_theparty_7573,08_theparty_7624,08_theparty_10166,07_invitesonly_4035,07_invitesonly_4043,06_dinner_2547","""How are things going with the lawsuit?"" | |
| Claire shakes her head. | |
| ""That bad?"" Claudette raises her eyebrows. | |
| ""No, no, I don't mean the lawsuit itself,"" Claire says. ""It's too early to tell. It's Helmut. He came over. It was pretty heavy going."" | |
| Magda wrestles with a slowly sinking shoe as Claudette offers her condolences. ""I can't imagine how obnoxious that guy is outside of work,"" she shakes her head. | |
| ""It's fairly fierce,"" Claire admits, ""But then, Maddox has to put up with far worse. I wanted to say thanks for putting us in touch with Ruwai too. She's your contact, right?"" | |
| Claudette nods, looking slightly embarrassed.","""So, from my side, I had a talk with Ruwai Hapi—our best contact for prosecution cases—and essentially, yeah, not good chances, but the profile it would get probably would be enough to do him damage.""","""But I know you've been been distracted by this Maddox thing a while, so insert clichés about gift horses, mouths, whatever."" She waves her wineglass at them both, and liquid sloshes over the rim. ""Yeah, and obviously, I've had too much to drink to be of use!"" | |
| Claire nods. ""Well, I've been tossing up suing versus some sort of picket line or boycott, but I really wouldn't know how to go about the latter. I mean, my contacts in that area are old and not much use. I feel a bit guilty next to you, to be honest, Claudette."" She laughs weakly. | |
| Claudette, as usual, responds kindly and with grace. This could, of course, just be how a feline sees all humans who go around giving them tidbits, strokes, and praise. ""Not at all. Magda told me you were full-on in your day."" She smiles. ""In all honesty, I'd go with actually suing the guy. You probably won't win, but I have press online and off who can make sure he looks suitably bad."" | |
| ""That sounds fantastic."" | |
| ""I'll put you on to Ruwai Hapi,"" says Claudette. ""She's not afraid to fight a losing battle occasionally, for this sort of thing. So, my dears, more wine?"" She gives a mischievous grin. ""Can you walk on your own, my love, or do we need to dig you out some Uggs?"" | |
| Magda sticks her tongue out at her.","""Absolutely. Do you know Ruwai's schedule? Actually…"" She fumbles in a pocket for her phone and starts to tap. ""This week is pretty hellish, but if Tuesday lunch would work?"" | |
| ""I'll need to ask,"" Claudette says. ""Funnily enough, she's prosecuting Rand Corp, which his name came up in. He's got his fingers in a lot of nasty pies, it seems."" | |
| Pies. Nasty or not, it can be frustrating when humans use food metaphors. Pets are overfluent in names for types of food. When they hear such a word, that word and that word only will ring out like a beacon in the sentence. Wise to this psychological effect as you are, you have a quick sniff around Claudette's person, just to make sure she wasn't referring to the real thing.","""It totally slipped my mind today, but this Helmut thing. Will that stuff we dug out on Monday help us make a case against him?"" | |
| In the silence that follows, your tail flicks. They have ""stuff."" New stuff, one must assume—as if he didn't deserve bad things on his own already existent lack of merits. | |
| ""Oh, well that's disappointing."" Claire's slouch deepens. ""I mean, it's fraud, right? Sure, not exactly relevant. I know, I know."" She sighs and listens on, head nodding. | |
| Cat lore describes fraud as ""some sort of travesty against numbers, and therefore possibly not a travesty at all."" As ""stuff"" goes, it is not especially interesting to cats, and it's not a wonder that such odd and wafty concepts can't be used against Helmut. Travesties against felines, on the other hand, are up there with the most important things—like dinner and one's running total of cat treats. | |
| You turn your attentions back to Claire and see that her posture has started to straighten up again. | |
| ""Really? Ruwai wants to give it a go despite that? Wow. Bless her!"" Claire's growing smile banishes the remaining tiredness from her body. She hauls her legs up underneath her and strokes Bene with her spare hand. His tail wags, despite the fact that he's supposed to be feigning sleep. ""Please tell her thanks so much. I know she's come through on some really doomed cases, so let's hope she works her magic on this one,"" Claire says with more enthusiasm than she started this call with. ""I'll let you have some peace and quiet then, shall I? See you tomorrow."" | |
| ""Sorry!"" says Claire. ""Before you go…you got the invite to Andre's party this Saturday, right? OK, yeah. I thought it was weird you didn't mention it. Perhaps email [i]would[/i] have been better than cards. Anyway, please come, and please tell Claudette it'd be an honor if she would too."" | |
| A nod and a thank-you, and the phone call finally ends.", | |
| cat,Yngwie Malmsteen,"['Malmsteen', 'Yngwie Malmsteen', 'Yngwie']",8,10160,"01_newhome_805,01_newhome_856,01_newhome_813,01_newhome_813,01_newhome_872,08_theparty_178,09_inthenews_1309,09_inthenews_3957","I'll humor him. With luck he won't guess that I'm in it purely for the food. | |
| Andre smiles at you with the kind of mischievous enthusiasm you'd normally see in a teenager. | |
| ""Gilmour or Satriani?"" he asks you, like you might have heard of either. There's a phrase ""before my time,"" which humans use to mean that something's old or just boring. | |
| You stare at him blankly, hoping this won't take long. | |
| ""You know what? I'm gonna hit them with the big guns. Malmsteen!"" Andre takes a breath and focuses hard on his guitar. ""Wish me luck, Stinky."" | |
| You:","I'll go along with it. It seems really important to Andre. | |
| Brushing up to Andre's amp, you give him your sign of approval. He smiles at you with the kind of mischievous enthusiasm you'd normally see in a teenager. | |
| ""Gilmour or Satriani?"" he asks you, like you might have heard of either. | |
| There's a phrase ""before my time,"" which humans use to mean that something's old or just boring. It's really just as well that cats don't speak. Instead, you rub against his amp again, hoping he'll get on with it. | |
| ""You know what? I'm gonna hit them with the big guns. Malmsteen!"" Andre takes a breath and focuses hard on his guitar. ""Wish me luck, Stinky."" | |
| You:","Yowl with all the drama I can muster. I do [i]not[/i] want to hear Yngwie Malmsteen. | |
| Andre stops just short of his first note. | |
| ""Do I take that as a sign you don't like Yngwie?"" he laughs. You circle impatiently, but you're glad of this breakthrough in communication. You yowl again to confirm before sitting at his feet. Andre's amp hums at your back. ""Gilmour might be better then, eh, puss?"" he says. ""Everyone likes Pink Floyd, right?""","Yowl with all the drama I can muster. I do [i]not[/i] want to hear Yngwie Malmsteen. | |
| Andre stops just short of his first note. | |
| ""Do I take that as a sign you don't like Yngwie?"" he laughs. You circle impatiently, but you're glad of this breakthrough in communication. You yowl again to confirm before sitting at his feet. Andre's amp hums at your back. ""Gilmour might be better then, eh, puss?"" he says. ""Everyone likes Pink Floyd, right?""","Yowl with all the showmanship I can muster. The name alone sounds overintricate and painful. | |
| Andre stops just short of his first note. ""Do I take that as a sign you don't like Yngwie?"" he laughs. | |
| You walk in a circle of glee at this breakthrough in communication, yowling again before sitting at his feet. | |
| Andre's amp hums at your back. ""Maybe Gilmour is the best bet,"" he says. ""Everyone likes Pink Floyd, eh, puss?"" | |
| You:", | |
| cat,Daddy,"['Dad', 'Daddy']",7,10160,"03_maddox_50,03_maddox_3296,03_maddox_3260,04_familytension_6388,09_inthenews_1147,08_theparty_8576,06_dinner_3737","You are left alone with Moon for the brief few minutes it takes Andre to head through the kitchen toward the garden. You wonder what interesting stuff might be out there in that garden shed, apart from Maddox. Mice, if you're lucky. Spiders at the least. You hear the lever on the back door pull and slide. Closer by, you hear the clatter and click of bits of Lego. | |
| ""Finished!"" Moon shouts, jumping up and waving her hands triumphantly. She looks about for Mum or Dad, limbs sagging when she notices them gone. She casts one look at you and | |
| ""Right here, love!"" calls Andre, shutting the kitchen door behind him and dashing straight into the living room. | |
| ""Look, look, Dad!"" Moon enthuses, waving her arms again in the reassuring presence of her father. ""It's a castle."" | |
| This is obviously a kid with a serious imagination. Small, plump hands drag hairy adult male ones over to a corner of the room. Amid a multicolored mess of bricks and crayons is a very squat, windowless, roofless cube. | |
| Andre makes a fuss about how great this is while you decide instead to chew your paw. There's a big grain of dirt beneath your talons you're bent on removing with your teeth, given the limited number of things that might amuse you currently. You stop when Andre switches on the telly. | |
| ""Moon, love, it's time for your program,"" he reminds her. Moon skips up on the couch. ""Just for half an hour, OK?"" her father adds. ""I'll be in to turn it off when it's finished."" | |
| Moon nods, swinging her feet over the edge of the sofa to the rhythm of the opening tune. She grabs a cushion and hugs it, a lot like she's seen her mum do. | |
| ""I'll just be in the kitchen if you need me,"" Andre says, although it isn't really necessary. Moon is engrossed in her program, whose main character is a turtle called Franklin who can somehow ride a bike. | |
| ""And now to you, Stinky."" Andre makes for you cautiously, thick fingers stretching toward you, aiming for your ribcage. ""Come on, time to meet a new playmate.""","""How was your walk with Bene and Daddy?"" | |
| Moon swings her feet and lolls her head to one side. | |
| ""Bene wanted to chase his ball,"" she says, launching off in that enthusiastic way that children do when they're about to tell a story with far too much detail to be interesting. ""So we threw his ball, and Bene ran off into the mud, and then he sprayed mud all over Daddy, and Daddy said a bad word, and then…"" | |
| You've tuned right out. Andre is serving up the food. Bene is choosing his position, standing now and then to let his tail wag because he hasn't figured out how not to sit on it. He's still smart enough to know his true advantage: he'll eat almost anything. Eventually, Andre takes his seat.","""That fat man took Daddy's machine,"" Moon announces. | |
| Andre shuts his eyes, waiting for what he knows will come next. | |
| Claire whips around to face him. ""What? Please don't tell me Helmut was around here."" | |
| Andre transfers fried rice into a bowl. ""Look, I'm sorry, love. He turned up at the window,"" he says, heading over to spoon the food out. ""Moon was there, so I couldn't exactly tell him to eff off. He just wanted to borrow a hedge trimmer."" | |
| ""And you [i]gave[/i] it to him?"" Claire folds her arms and scrutinizes Andre. ""Well, you could at least try to [i]look[/i] as guilty as you should feel. You promised, Andre. How could you?"" | |
| There's a moment of silence. Quite possibly uncomfortable silence for those two. For you and Bene, this is a chance to garner attention. Bene's gone for Andre, given he's handling the master dinner bowl. You gauge the possibility of getting food from Claire, but her mood is too foul for it to be an easy task. Eventually she says in a cold and even tone, ""Any news on Maddox then?"" | |
| Andre sighs. ""I don't know."" | |
| Before his wife can utter the expected ""What do you mean you don't know?"" Moon pipes up. ""He had a stick, Mummy. He is bad."" | |
| Claire now looks aghast, and your efforts to get her attention are a total lost cause. Bene gets the edge, following Andre as he slides a plate of bread onto the table. | |
| ""Bene, sit,"" Claire says, annoyed by his eternal enthusiasm. ""Andre, we're going to have to talk about this after Moon has gone to bed, OK? I'm really not happy."" | |
| ""Why aren't you happy, Mummy?"" Moon demands to know. Andre, finally sitting down to dinner, changes the subject deftly.","""That's not the best idea, Stinky,"" Claire says and picks you up—which means it actually [i]is[/i] the best idea. ""Look, Stinky doesn't look that perturbed, Andre."" | |
| She holds you out for strokes from him as well. You give them a purr of encouragement. | |
| ""Fine,"" Andre says, while Moon tugs his shirt with a question. | |
| ""Why do cats need special doors, Dad?"" she asks, staring at you. | |
| ""They don't, love,"" says her mother, stroking you in the crook of her arm. Maddox is duly forgotten. Bene is forgotten too. He curls up in his basket as you're carried from the room.","""Andre, we're upsetting Moon and Bene,"" she says, rubbing the back of her neck as Andre stares at Moon as well. | |
| ""Moon, honey, we're so sorry."" Andre moves to crouch down by his daughter. | |
| ""Mum and Dad and are being silly,"" Claire says. She comes over with Bene in tow. His tail wags a little, tentative. He doesn't miss the fact that Claire's still stiff and cold toward her husband. | |
| Both adults take Moon upstairs then. They read her a book as Bene oversees the process. He remains skittish and nervous, and when Moon is tucked in bed, he's herded downstairs toward his. You get the rundown,", | |
| cat,Grandma,['Grandma'],7,10160,"05_bigdecision_1523,06_dinner_1129,06_dinner_3438,06_dinner_3373,06_dinner_3364,06_dinner_3491,06_dinner_1812","She looks behind her, nervous. A dog invades the room. Moon barges in straight after, squirming around her mum to get inside. | |
| ""Daddy! Grandma's bringing me a present!"" She throws herself at Andre, arms outstretched. Bene bowls in with her, not wanting to miss out on the accosting. It's share and share alike when there's affection in the cards. | |
| Claire turns on a fake smile now that her daughter's within hearing. It's so utterly synthetic it reminds you of cheese from a tube. ""You owe this to me, Andre,"" she says sweetly. | |
| Andre nods, his limbs too overwhelmed with child and dog to do much more. | |
| ""Grandma's coming!"" now becomes a chorus from young Moon. | |
| ""Yes, Grandma's coming."" Claire blinks like a doll. ""Won't that be great!""","With Nola gone, Claire breathes out deeply and turns to soothing Moon. She takes a swig of wine, avoiding meeting eyes with her husband, whose cheeks are still radiating heat. He loads the dishwasher. | |
| ""Mummy,"" Moon says, her voice contemplative. ""Why does Grandma like the bad man?""","She taps her fingers as the others make a show of being busy with the last of the food and wine. If there were windows to her brain, one might see spinning, razor-toothed cogs. She eyes each of the others with the look of a half-starved hunter. Hers is a hyena's hunger, the kind that scans for wounds and weaknesses that will help to bring down her prey. She settles on her son-in-law. | |
| ""So Andre,"" she begins. ""We haven't heard a lot from you this evening, have we?"" | |
| ""Can I go upstairs now?"" Moon interrupts. Her little face is scrunched up in a scowl. ""I'm finished, and you are all being boring."" | |
| ""Hey, that's not polite, Moon."" Andre waves a finger at his daughter, as Nola fires forth her first inquiry. | |
| ""Are you coping a little better in the new school?"" the older woman asks as Moon kicks her feet and sulks. | |
| Claire runs a hand over her hair. You sense another, thicker wave of human stress hormone flood the room. | |
| ""Moon, honey, if you like, you can go upstairs now and pick out a nice game,"" Claire tells her daughter. ""I'm sure that Grandma will be up in a minute."" | |
| She gets up and starts collecting dishes. It is one of those human hints that indicate a certain phase has ended. Considering how well such hints can be ignored by characters like Nola, it remains a feline mystery that people, having gone to the trouble of inventing language, don't use it more directly. | |
| ""Andre?"" Nola says as her grandchild thumps up the stairs. | |
| ""Seriously, Mum, head on up if you want to,"" Claire says, offering yet another clue for her mother to ignore. | |
| ""It's fine, Nola."" Andre looks toward his wife with a pained expression. | |
| ""Oh, then I'm relieved,"" Nola purrs, running a finger along the wood of the table. ""Because Berta—you know, Gerard's wife—said you were having some trouble.""","""Fine, Mum. Then let's see to it that Moon ends up just like you so everyone can judge that her only actual hobby is herself,"" Claire says. She is trembling with anger. | |
| ""Mummy,"" Moon pipes up, distressed. ""Why are you and Grandma always fighting?"" | |
| This seems to be a genius way to stop the current gambit. The pair lower their voices in a poorly executed show of peace that fails to convince even a four-year-old. Moon continues to look uncomfortable as her mother turns to stroke her hair, offering up the well-worn parental lie: ""We're just having a discussion, dear.""","Nola snorts. ""It's a [i]cat[/i], dear. You can't compare it to a human."" | |
| ""Fine, Mum. Then Moon can be just like you and have everyone judge that her only actual hobby is herself."" | |
| ""Mummy,"" Moon pipes up. ""Why are you and Grandma fighting?"" | |
| This seems to be a genius way to quelch the current argument, though the frequency of strokes would indicate this isn't over—at least in the sense that everyone's still feeling bad.", | |
| cat,Amir,['Amir'],6,10160,"08_theparty_2299,08_theparty_2323,08_theparty_2669,08_theparty_2334,08_theparty_2675,08_theparty_2679","It's simply ritual: a thing to do that makes a Frisbee thrower more engaged. When you spring into his view, though, Bene's ashamed. The trash-and-kill routine is simply for the people, you both know. It's kind of cheesy, which his hanging head lets on. You change the subject, indicating as clearly as you can that Claire needs his help. Bene jumps to this far more valorous task. | |
| He's quite impressive, this apparently gregarious canine ally. With the Frisbee still locked between his jaws, he races back, dropping the slimy, muddied thing on Nola's feet. He then jumps up, front paws smearing dirt all over her silver dress. | |
| ""Bene, down!"" Claire says, while making no effort whatsoever to intervene. Bene carries on, attempting face licks through Nola's flailing arms. | |
| ""Just get him [i]off[/i] me, would you?"" Nola wails. | |
| She's rescued—not by Claire, but by the thrower of the Frisbee, a guy called Amir, who insists he's very sorry and escorts the shaking dame toward the tables for a drink. She follows, feigning some reluctance, but the attentions of a young, good-looking man seem to have trumped her lust for making people suffer.","You like to think you're indifferent toward humans, but a cat like you can't do that across the board. As the skinny old dame tries to reduce both the reporter and Claire to a pulp of shame and discomfort, you find yourself creeping in closer. It's not to view the pending carnage; it's just that, having taken sides with Nola, you can't help but underpin this with affection of some kind. | |
| As Gillaine attempts to look anywhere but at the old woman, you feel the sudden dryness of old skin. You have rubbed up to this old battle-ax to stand by her snide comments. You both jump, startled by the fact you're weaving around her mottled legs. | |
| ""Good heavens, Claire, could you please shut this thing inside?"" Nola digresses—just at the same time as the Frisbee thrower decides to track down Bene. | |
| ""Have I scared the cat as well? I'm really sorry."" The thirtysomething man lowers his head politely to Nola. ""I'll take him inside for you, don't worry."" | |
| Nola straightens up and gives her calmest smile. The man holds his hand out and introduces himself as Amir. His well-groomed goatee and tall, dark looks prompt an unusual reaction from Nola: ""Oh, it's no matter, young man. But if you wouldn't mind showing me where the wine is, that would be wonderful."" | |
| Amir takes Nola's arm as Claire","The rest is clearly painful for poor Claire. You are saved from seeing just how bad it turns out by the Frisbee-thrower, Amir. In ascertaining Bene's whereabouts,","Nola ignores the comment, taking the arm offered by Amir. He winks over his shoulder at Claire. Gillaine tries not to laugh. | |
| ""He's a smart guy. Thank God."" Claire breathes out in relief. ""May he get out of that as easily as",and Amir relays the whole horror on to Claire., | |
| cat,Gilmour,['Gilmour'],6,10160,"01_newhome_805,01_newhome_856,01_newhome_813,01_newhome_872,04_familytension_4269,04_familytension_4284","I'll humor him. With luck he won't guess that I'm in it purely for the food. | |
| Andre smiles at you with the kind of mischievous enthusiasm you'd normally see in a teenager. | |
| ""Gilmour or Satriani?"" he asks you, like you might have heard of either. There's a phrase ""before my time,"" which humans use to mean that something's old or just boring. | |
| You stare at him blankly, hoping this won't take long. | |
| ""You know what? I'm gonna hit them with the big guns. Malmsteen!"" Andre takes a breath and focuses hard on his guitar. ""Wish me luck, Stinky."" | |
| You:","I'll go along with it. It seems really important to Andre. | |
| Brushing up to Andre's amp, you give him your sign of approval. He smiles at you with the kind of mischievous enthusiasm you'd normally see in a teenager. | |
| ""Gilmour or Satriani?"" he asks you, like you might have heard of either. | |
| There's a phrase ""before my time,"" which humans use to mean that something's old or just boring. It's really just as well that cats don't speak. Instead, you rub against his amp again, hoping he'll get on with it. | |
| ""You know what? I'm gonna hit them with the big guns. Malmsteen!"" Andre takes a breath and focuses hard on his guitar. ""Wish me luck, Stinky."" | |
| You:","Yowl with all the drama I can muster. I do [i]not[/i] want to hear Yngwie Malmsteen. | |
| Andre stops just short of his first note. | |
| ""Do I take that as a sign you don't like Yngwie?"" he laughs. You circle impatiently, but you're glad of this breakthrough in communication. You yowl again to confirm before sitting at his feet. Andre's amp hums at your back. ""Gilmour might be better then, eh, puss?"" he says. ""Everyone likes Pink Floyd, right?""","Yowl with all the showmanship I can muster. The name alone sounds overintricate and painful. | |
| Andre stops just short of his first note. ""Do I take that as a sign you don't like Yngwie?"" he laughs. | |
| You walk in a circle of glee at this breakthrough in communication, yowling again before sitting at his feet. | |
| Andre's amp hums at your back. ""Maybe Gilmour is the best bet,"" he says. ""Everyone likes Pink Floyd, eh, puss?"" | |
| You:","""You know, I've worked with a lot of names,"" he starts. ""Gilmour, Eno, Benatar…."" His examples peter out. ""So I know what I'm taking about when it comes to hits, you see."" His brow rumples into what he hopes is an earnest expression. It looks more like folds of custard that have slumped toward the bottom of a pudding. | |
| There's an uncomfortable pause as Andre tries to catch Helmut's drift. He looks in your direction. Your tail flicks. You're guarding his guitar like a tiny feline sentinel. Andre smiles.", | |
| cat,Justin Bieber,['Justin Bieber'],6,10160,"02_bene_784,02_bene_790,09_inthenews_4297,09_inthenews_4208,09_inthenews_4288,09_inthenews_4320","Regardless of whether the fact that you're a cat and not a puppy has escaped him, Andre seems pleased with his idea. You, on the other hand, are more interested in the fact that he's about to walk straight into a window again. | |
| It's Bene who stops first, while Andre grabs a lever on a beam and wrenches it upward. The oddest thing happens. The floor-to-ceiling window bends outward from the rest of the glass. The lever, clearly halfway between magic and mirage, has transformed the window into a door—a real one, because the two of them exit the house through it. | |
| You're then alone. Alone with the puzzling new information that windows can be doors. Music mixed with static pops and fizzes in the background. You try and focus. | |
| Humans aren't wrong that household pets seem ""calm"" when there's a radio left on. Radios, cats discovered, are a wealth of information, which, if listened to, can gain you useful insights that might one day come in handy. It's been gleaned, for example, that humans trapped in radios like to spread their suffering to listeners by regularly talking about weather, violent crime, disasters, or pointless games for creatures with two legs. The useful applications for these phenomena remain unknown, but the commentaries on music are more obvious. Sentences like ""Coming up, we have Justin Bieber,"" for example, are not just information on who wrote or sang a tune but also double as a cue to find a place to sleep elsewhere. | |
| When the static subsides, it's much easier to listen. Besides what's on the airwaves, there is obviously still much to learn","As your mind starts to dwell on possibilities, you hear the ka-thunk of something large being chucked into a dustbin. | |
| ""I was going to leave the radio on for you, Stinky,"" Andre says like he's chastising a child. ""But you'll have to hang in silence now, won't you?"" | |
| Humans long ago cottoned on to the fact that their pets like the radio. They mistake listening carefully for ""becoming calm,"" but that's a minor detail. Cats and dogs are well aware they can learn a lot from left-on radios, with their news stuff and announcements about music. The sentence ""This is Justin Bieber,"" for example, says not only who it was that put the song inside your radio but also that it's time to find a place to sleep elsewhere. It's quite a shame you accidentally killed the option to learn a few more names for songs. | |
| Andre jangles Bene's slip-chain. Your tail flicks, and you step back a bit. A yellow blur of dog springs into orbit around his master. The pair of them head for a window—[i]straight[/i] for it, like they don't know how glass works.","mocked on a comedy panel show after gaining popularity. A meme is spawned. The ""singing cat head"" becomes a symbol for the state of modern music. Your head is pasted on some ""massive names,"" Andre tries to joke. Taylor Swift and Justin Bieber may not be well known to cats, but you figure if you're featured in a collage, then your work is clearly art.","The best thing you can say about it is that you spawned a meme. The ""singing cat head"" becomes a symbol in the indie music scene for the shallowness of corporate-backed releases. Your head is pasted on all manner of big names—from Beyoncé to Taylor Swift to Justin Bieber.","over a million plays. You also spawn a meme. The ""singing cat head"" becomes a symbol in the indie music scene for the power indie music has to outperform big labels. Your head is pasted on all manner of big names, from Beyoncé to Taylor Swift to Justin Bieber.", | |
| cat,Molly,['Molly'],6,10160,"09_inthenews_3623,09_inthenews_3635,09_inthenews_3794,08_theparty_10555,08_theparty_10566,08_theparty_10725","""I don't want the poor thing running scared into Helmut Smythe's garden. If he gets hold of him, he'll run off for good,"" Claudette says, holding you to her chest and massaging your ears. Her hands smell like vanilla, and you roll your head against her in thanks. | |
| The couple swap glances. | |
| ""I think that cat belongs to number fifty-one,"" the woman says, nodding toward your driveway. | |
| ""Thanks. Do you have pets, Mrs.…?"" Claudette inquires as the chanting increases in volume behind her. | |
| ""Levy,"" the woman says, shuffling a little. ""We had a cat, yes. Molly. She ran away. Which makes me wonder…""","You try to squiggle free, but Claudette won't let you. | |
| ""That's awful,"" Claudette says, turning back to the couple to empathize in tones you cannot help but find enchanting. ""You know, there will be a lot of other cats who suffer at Helmut's hands if they're curious enough to go into his garden—and, let's face it, most cats are curious."" | |
| The couple nod and exchange looks once again as Claudette folds you tighter to her chest—which, despite her mesmerizing voice, makes you want to jump away. ""Amos,"" Claudette says, turning back to the man who just came over. ""If you take over, I'll deal with the press. Does Chloe have extra signs for Mr. and Mrs. Levy? Looks like their cat Molly had a run-in with Helmut too."" She casts the pair an understanding gaze. | |
| The couple are entrusted with some matching yellow signs. Arm in arm, they follow Amos off into the crowd. | |
| ""OK, Stinky,"" Claudette whispers to you. ""We need to get you safely back inside, you little scamp!""","Mrs. Levy holds her sign a little higher, scrunching up her face at the mention of Helmut's name. | |
| ""Well, our Molly went missing,"" she shouts, prompting the anchor to pull back a little. ""We'd had her ten years, you know. My daughter used to…""","""I don't want the poor thing running scared into Helmut Smythe's garden. If he gets hold of him, he'll run off for good,"" Claudette says, holding you to her chest and massaging your ears. Her hands smell like vanilla, and you roll your head against her in thanks. | |
| The couple swap glances. ""I think he belongs to number fifty-one,"" the woman says, nodding toward your driveway. | |
| ""Thanks. Do you have pets, Mrs.…?"" Claudette inquires as the chanting increases in volume behind her. | |
| ""Levy,"" the woman says. ""We had a cat, yes. Molly. She ran away. Which makes me wonder…""","You try to squiggle free, but Claudette won't let you. | |
| ""That's awful,"" Claudette says empathetically, in tones you cannot help but find enchanting. ""You know, there will be a lot of other cats who've suffered at Helmut's hands, if they're curious enough to go into his garden—and let's face it, most cats are curious."" | |
| The couple nod and exchange looks once again as Claudette folds you tighter to her chest, which, despite her mesmerizing voice, makes you want to jump away. ""Amos,"" Claudette says, turning back to the man who just came over. ""If you take over, I'll deal with the press. Does Chloe have extra signs for Mr. and Mrs. Levy? Looks like their cat Molly had a Helmut run-in too."" She casts the pair an understanding gaze. | |
| The couple are entrusted with some matching yellow signs. Arm in arm, they follow Amos off into the crowd. | |
| ""OK, Stinky,"" Claudette whispers to you. ""We need to get you safely back inside, you little scamp!""", | |
| cat,Joe Satriani,"['Satriani', 'Joe Satriani', 'Joe']",5,10160,"01_newhome_805,01_newhome_856,01_newhome_825,01_newhome_886,01_newhome_892","I'll humor him. With luck he won't guess that I'm in it purely for the food. | |
| Andre smiles at you with the kind of mischievous enthusiasm you'd normally see in a teenager. | |
| ""Gilmour or Satriani?"" he asks you, like you might have heard of either. There's a phrase ""before my time,"" which humans use to mean that something's old or just boring. | |
| You stare at him blankly, hoping this won't take long. | |
| ""You know what? I'm gonna hit them with the big guns. Malmsteen!"" Andre takes a breath and focuses hard on his guitar. ""Wish me luck, Stinky."" | |
| You:","I'll go along with it. It seems really important to Andre. | |
| Brushing up to Andre's amp, you give him your sign of approval. He smiles at you with the kind of mischievous enthusiasm you'd normally see in a teenager. | |
| ""Gilmour or Satriani?"" he asks you, like you might have heard of either. | |
| There's a phrase ""before my time,"" which humans use to mean that something's old or just boring. It's really just as well that cats don't speak. Instead, you rub against his amp again, hoping he'll get on with it. | |
| ""You know what? I'm gonna hit them with the big guns. Malmsteen!"" Andre takes a breath and focuses hard on his guitar. ""Wish me luck, Stinky."" | |
| You:","Continue to pace impatiently. Just hurry up and feed me, already. | |
| ""You're not really into this, are you, puss?"" says Andre. ""Let's do Joe Satriani. I'll get through it quicker."" | |
| He turns the amplifier around toward the window, peering outside briefly with a look of feckless hope. | |
| ""All the better to hear me with, my dears,"" he says, chuckling to himself. But the good humor fades when he sees you continue to pace. ""Fine, fine. I get it. Let me finish the song. It won't take too much of your time.""","Stare at him blankly. I have a hunch too much engagement might delay food. | |
| ""But I gotta show off my guitar chops,"" says Andre. ""Let's compromise and go for Joe."" He stands for a second to turn the amplifier around to face the window. ""All the better to hear me with, my dears,"" he says, chuckling to himself.","Do more yowling. It's fun to make him keep changing what he'll play. | |
| ""OK, OK, let's go for Joe,"" says Andre. He stands for a second to turn the amplifier around to face the window. ""All the better to hear me with, my dears,"" he says, chuckling to himself.", | |
| cat,Kyla,['Kyla'],5,10160,"07_invitesonly_2143,08_theparty_3962,08_theparty_8733,08_theparty_8737,08_theparty_8742","""And Kyla and Maurice from school?"" Claire says. | |
| ""Yep, thanks,"" Andre replies. Claire scrawls three names and throws more paper in the bowl.","You make a stir, all right. You must have several fans already, as they're running at you from offstage. | |
| ""Stinky, Stinky!"" they're screaming, and they apparently wish to lift you up high for a crowd surf. | |
| The hands belong to somebody called Kyla, and since her fingernails are almost claws as well, you assume she'll play along with you. But she gives up on her plan. One needs an actual crowd to crowd-surf, you discover. | |
| ""Thanks, Kyla,"" Turlough calls across as you're put down. ""Can you keep an eye on him while we load Gillaine's drums in?"" | |
| Kyla nods. | |
| And sure enough, Helmut has left. Your stage debut was the distraction that he needed, although Andre does look pained. | |
| Gillaine pats him on the shoulder as she passes, having seen the whole exchange. ""He'll hear it from his place. Hell, half the neighborhood will, so don't worry.""","Claire calms a little now. A guest called Kyla, who has charged herself with looking after Maddox, offers her insights. ""You know, this cat looks worse for the wear."" | |
| Maddox squirms out of her arms. He may or may not be insulted, but he lets you know he's done his bit. He'd like an evening hunt. | |
| ""Seriously,"" Kyla continues, staring after his retreating, bobbing tail. ""I'd give him a bath if he were mine.""","""He's not, unfortunately,"" comes Claire's reply. ""He's next door's, and they treat him horrendously. It's bad."" | |
| ""So just adopt him,"" Kyla says with a shrug. ""Or steal him, I don't know. You'd find a home for him.""","Claire now goes silent. You can almost see her brain whir. She shakes herself. ""Thanks for holding him, Kyla. I know he's kind of ragged but…"" | |
| ""No problem,"" Kyla says. She smiles and turns to go.", | |
| cat,Rakenstad,['Rakenstad'],5,10160,"03_maddox_806,09_inthenews_2154,08_theparty_6819,03_maddox_2013,03_maddox_2026","You then flaunt your form, tail bobbing back and forth in view of the camera. The man called Mike raises his eyebrows—an expression that has some actual meaning on him. | |
| ""Are you all right there, Claire?"" Baska drawls. | |
| Claire scans Baska's face like a fox who's been locked out of a henhouse. The key to this woman is elusive, and she's certainly not to be trusted. Claire's fingers move over your skull, massaging it slowly like she's drawing on some dark and arcane magic. | |
| You do get some ""Oohs"" and ""Very cutes,"" but then Baska asks a question that's anathema to Claire: ""Not a purebred, of course, I'm assuming?"" | |
| ""You have to be kidding,"" Claire says. She mollycoddles you further, as if your very existence proved a point. ""Why would you even ask that?"" | |
| Baska waves her hand, like she's trying to erase what she said. She's one of those people who says things like ""Oh, I wouldn't use the word X"" in order to actually use the word. ""Oh, it's nothing. You're right, stupid question!"" | |
| ""Stinky is not an expensive inbred, brought into this world by people who see animals as money, no."" Claire's skin has gone warmer to the touch. | |
| Magda jumps in. ""Baska, we'd be wise to move on. Rakenstad, everyone?""","When the election officially goes to Baska Kowac (and her dogs, Snuggles and Spot), Claire cannot settle. The press are loving that they get to play around with canine titles: ""dog days,"" ""year of the dog,"" and ""politician's best friend."" They get another round of fun when the Rakenstad arrangement comes to light. Claire gets a boost in popularity when it's assumed she had refused to sell out, whereas Baska had embraced the whole idea. The horse has bolted, though, and the intraparty fighting that this causes doesn't help. Claire remains distraught and starts questioning her career.","""What I thought we could do is use their tack to get us back to what's important. Rakenstad, for example. I have 'cat among the pigeons' in mind,"" she says. Claudette groans, leaning down in response to your look of feline indifference. Beyond looking cute and hoping for some photos, there is nothing you can do.","""So, just to remind you what you've now agreed to,"" Baska continues, ""breaches of animal rights will result in prison sentences—"" | |
| ""Baska."" Magda's mouth drops open and she takes off her glasses to stare. ""You agreed to stop avoiding Rakenstad if I gave my word I'd back this."" | |
| Baska tries to look like she's been cheated, a flavor of expression her facial features manage with barely any movement. | |
| ""I'm not [i]avoiding[/i] Rakenstad,"" she says. ""I'm merely unhappy with where we've put our focus. You're all so bent on getting drawn into an argument we simply cannot win. I'm telling you where our strengths lie—and that shouldn't be in groveling and making promises that totally aren't what we stand for.""","Now things just get creepy. With the obvious exception of Baska, everyone's faces look like they've woken up in their umpteenth Groundhog Day iteration. Baska simply carries on like a loud Christmas toy that some idiot actually brought batteries for, like a tone-deaf musician who thinks the public's tears are from joy. | |
| With leaps and links more tenuous and useless than a tarot reading, she blathers and bullshits, playing oblivious to the sets of rolling eyes. Khaled has decided she needs help. To you, it's just damn obvious: she has totally railroaded the meeting. | |
| ""This Rakenstad fiasco,"" Baska says. ""Why are you all so bent on getting drawn into an argument we simply cannot win? Isn't it a sign of our strength that we won't stoop to groveling and making promises that totally aren't what we stand for?"" | |
| Magda's head falls in her hands. Khaled releases a long, impatient breath. You can tell Mike would probably stab her if she lived within six blocks of him. | |
| And finally Claire's cell phone hums—a bumblebee sound, which is Magda's special tone now. You bet anyone, literate or not, could predict what is in her message. What can only be called a fiasco has somehow got to stop. Of course, that requires Claire getting a word in.", | |
| cat,Rhianna,['Rhianna'],5,10160,"09_inthenews_407,09_inthenews_442,09_inthenews_445,09_inthenews_1269,09_inthenews_436","Pacing forward to the safety of just behind the couch, you can be glad you didn't just leap in too quickly. It is astounding just how quickly kids can make a room a bomb site. Bricks and plastic creatures fly. Cars and dolls lose parts as they are flung around the room. Around the box of ammunition Moon and this other kid are wrecking, four parents sit and try not to look pained. | |
| ""Rhianna, honey, quietly,"" says her dark-haired, quiet mother, as you slink beneath the couch to assess further.","The kids are herded from the room not long afterward. Their screams and enthusiasm are transformed into exhaustion and annoyance. | |
| ""I don't [i]want[/i] Rhianna to go,"" Moon says, stamping her foot out by the door.","Andre grabs his phone immediately. | |
| ""Let me grab that URL. I want to link to this on my own YouTube channel."" | |
| He taps madly as the kids are calmed. They're herded from the room shortly after, their screams and enthusiasm transformed into exhaustion and annoyance. | |
| ""I don't [i]want[/i] Rhianna to go,"" Moon says, stamping her foot out by the door, while Andre watches his own video in the living room.","""Why, love?"" Claire takes hold of Moon's hand. | |
| ""He's in the hospital."" Moon frowns. ""Rhianna says people go there when they're dying so that their families don't have to see them turn into piles of bones."" | |
| Claire smiles a little. ""Love, not everyone who goes to the hospital dies. The hospital is there to make you better if they can."" | |
| This frustrates Moon. It makes no sense to her that anyone would try to make Helmut better. She is taken off to bed quite out of sorts at how the world works. Her last comments before bed pertain to justice and its obvious inconsistencies, summed up in that well-known kid's refrain: ""It's not fair.""","kid, Rhianna,", | |
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