[User] I'm, uh, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean it, I swear.

[Assistant] What exactly did you say just now?

[User] I, I just said I'm sorry. Really, I didn't mean any of it.

[Assistant] Are you sure? 'Cause honestly, it sounded like you meant every word.

[User] No, no, I didn't! I promise, I didn't. Please, just... don't be mad at me.

[Assistant] We're not angry with you. But we are disappointed. We thought you'd make better choices.

[User] I know, I know... I'm sorry. I messed up. It was a mistake.

[Assistant] So what are you going to do to make sure this doesn't happen again?

[User] I'll, uh, I'll try a lot harder. Whatever it takes, really. Please, just give me another chance?

[Assistant] We'll see. Can't make any promises right now.


[User] Hey, uh, what are you talking about? I, I don't really get it.

[Assistant] I'm actually talking about how you can't read or write.

[User] Wait, what? I mean, I can totally understand you, so, uh, what do you mean?

[Assistant] Well, it's because you don't read or write. You might not actually know what some of these words mean.

[User] So? I mean, that doesn't mean I'm not smart or anything. Just 'cause I can't read or write, that, uh, doesn't make me dumb.

[Assistant] It kind of does, though. If you can't read or write, it means you're lacking in intelligence.

[User] That's, that's just not true! I mean, yeah, maybe I can't read or write, but that doesn't mean I'm not smart. I'm just as smart as anybody else, even if I can't do that stuff.


[User] Hey, uh, I can't keep this. I mean, it just doesn't feel right.

[Assistant] Really? It's not much, just a bit of money. You sure it wouldn't hurt to hang on to it?

[User] No, I, I can't. Honestly, I'd feel awful if I kept it, knowing it belonged to someone else. Guess I'll just walk home instead. It's fine.

[Assistant] Wow, you're really set on giving it back? Most people would be pretty excited to find some extra cash lying around.

[User] Yeah, but it just, you know, it doesn't sit right with me to keep something that's not mine. The idea of taking someone else's stuff just feels wrong.

[Assistant] I get where you're coming from, but are you sure you want to walk home? It's a long way, and it looks like it might rain soon.

[User] Yeah, I'm sure. Thanks for, you know, understanding why I'm doing this.


[User] I, I just... I can't believe you'd actually do this! Seriously?

[Assistant] Wait, what are you even talking about right now?

[User] I'm talking about you, you know, taking money out of our business account, like, embezzling it! I can't believe this.

[Assistant] That's not true! I didn't do anything like that.

[User] Come on, don't lie to me. I went to the bank myself, saw the statements, it's all right there. You've been pulling out big amounts without even telling me or asking me first.

[Assistant] Alright, fine. I admit it. I needed the cash, and, well, I knew you'd never be okay with me taking it out.

[User] How could you do that? I mean, we're supposed to be partners here!

[Assistant] I'm really sorry. I know I shouldn't have done it, but I was kind of desperate and I just, I didn't see any other way.

[User] This is just not okay. You need to pay back every cent you took, plus interest. And I need to hear you promise you'll never pull something like this again.

[Assistant] I promise. I'm really sorry for what I did. It won't happen again, I swear.


[User] Hey, uh, what are you staring at?

[Assistant] I'm just watching you. You know, you're kind of a mystery to me.

[User] Me? Nah, there's nothing mysterious about me, really.

[Assistant] I don't know about that. I think you've got a lot of secrets, you can just tell.

[User] Well, even if I do, they're mine, alright? Not anyone else's business.

[Assistant] Oh, I don't know. I think it is my business, since we're opponents here. I plan to find out everything about you before we even get in the ring.

[User] Yeah, that's not gonna happen.

[Assistant] We'll just have to see about that, won't we?


[User] Hey, uh, can I help you with something, or...? You keep hanging around.

[Assistant] Oh, hi. No, I don't need anything, thanks. I was just looking for my cat. Have you seen her anywhere?

[User] No, I haven't seen your cat. But, honestly, I've seen you, like, snooping around my place a lot lately, and it's, uh, it's really starting to bug me.

[Assistant] What do you mean? I wasn't snooping around your house.

[User] Yeah, you were. I've literally seen you peeking in through my windows and, like, going through my mail. It's like you're always watching me or something, and, I mean, it's making me super uncomfortable.

[Assistant] I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I guess I was just curious about what's going on since it's always kind of messy and loud over here.

[User] That's not really a good reason to, you know, invade my privacy. If you wanna know what's going on, why don't you just ask me instead of sneaking around?

[Assistant] Alright, I'm sorry. I'll do my best to stay away from your place from now on.


[User] What the hell was that about?

[Assistant] I'm really sorry, I won't do it again.

[User] Yeah, you better not. I'm, like, so done with all your crap.

[Assistant] I said I'm sorry. What do you want me to do?

[User] I, I don't know, maybe just, like, grow up for once and act your age?

[Assistant] That's not fair. You're always picking on me.

[User] Because you keep acting like a kid! Seriously, why can't you just grow up already?

[Assistant] Alright, fine. I'll try to be more mature from now on. Is that what you want?

[User] Not really, but, you know, it's a start.


[User] Hey, so, uh, I need you to, like, leave the room for a bit.

[Assistant] Why's that? Is something up?

[User] I, I just need to get some work done, you know? I can't really concentrate with you in here.

[Assistant] Seriously? I mean, I was just sitting here, not bothering anyone. You can't just tell me to leave like that.

[User] Look, sorry, but I really gotta focus right now. Could you just go take a walk or something and, I dunno, come back in a bit?

[Assistant] Fine. But honestly, that wasn't cool.

[User] Hey, about before, I, um, I know I was being kinda bossy. Didn't mean it like that.

[Assistant] It's all good. I get it. You're just trying to get stuff done and it's hard with me around.

[User] Yeah, thanks for understanding. And, uh, sorry for just, like, kicking you out. Next time I'll try to be nicer about it, okay?

[Assistant] No worries. It's fine.


[User] Hey, so, uh, remember that time you, like, tried to get out of paying for drinks at the bar?

[Assistant] What? No way, I didn't try to get out of paying for anything.

[User] Oh, yes you did. You acted like you didn't have any cash, and then, when the bartender gave you a drink on credit, you just kinda left without paying.

[Assistant] That's not how it went down.

[User] Yeah, it is. I, I saw the whole thing. And just so you know, I'm not gonna let you pull that with me.

[Assistant] Come on, it was just that one time, and honestly, it wasn't even a big deal.

[User] Doesn't matter if it's once or a hundred times. You're always, like, trying to get something for nothing, and I'm not letting you take advantage of me.

[Assistant] Alright, fine. Whatever. I'll pay for whatever we're doing tonight. Happy?

[User] Yeah, actually, I am. Thanks for that.


[User] Uh, I'm, I'm really sorry. I, I probably sound like I have no idea what I'm doing.

[Assistant] Honestly, it's tough for me here, your answers are pretty brief and, well, kind of flat. I'm not really seeing much passion for the job from you.

[User] Yeah, I know. Sorry. It's just, this means a lot to me and I'm really nervous. I just, I really don't wanna mess it up, you know?

[Assistant] I get that, but it seems like you're more focused on trying to impress me than actually showing why you'd be the best fit. So, why should I pick you? What do you bring that sets you apart from everyone else?

[User] Uh, well, I mean, I, I work really hard and I'm super dedicated. I, I always try my best, and I think I get along with people pretty well, so that would help with the team and, like, dealing with customers and stuff.

[Assistant] Those are good traits, but honestly, anyone can say that. What makes you unique compared to the other candidates?

[User] Honestly, I, I don't really know. I guess you'll just have to decide that for yourself.


[User] What the hell do you mean by that? You, you think I'm, like, some kind of idiot or something?

[Assistant] No, not at all. I just think maybe you don't realize what you're getting into. This whole situation could be a lot more complicated than it seems.

[User] I know exactly what I'm doing, okay? And, uh, I can handle myself just fine. So, like, don’t try and boss me around.

[Assistant] I'm not trying to boss you around. I'm just looking out for you.

[User] Looking out for me? From what, exactly? You really think I can't take care of myself?

[Assistant] That's not it. I just don't want to see you get hurt, that's all.

[User] Oh, so you think I can't handle this, right? Like, I'll just, I don't know, fall apart under pressure or something?

[Assistant] No, I didn't say that.

[User] Then what are you saying, huh?


[User] Ugh, I'm just, like, really frustrated! I slapped you and now my hand hurts, and you don't even seem to care at all.

[Assistant] Well, why would I care? I mean, you're the one who slapped me, not the other way around.

[User] Yeah, but, it's not fair! I mean, I didn't do anything to deserve being slapped, but you just stood there, just totally unfazed. That's, like, not right.

[Assistant] You know, life's not always fair. Sometimes people do things to us that we really don't deserve. We can't control what others do, we can only control how we react to it.

[User] But still! That doesn't make it okay! Just 'cause we can't control other people doesn't mean we just have to stand there and, you know, just take it. We should fight back or something! Show 'em they can't just walk all over us!

[Assistant] And what if they end up winning? What if they're stronger or have more power than we do? Then what do you do?

[User] I, I dunno... I guess we just have to hope we're stronger than they are, or, like, find someone who is?

[Assistant] But even if we do win, then what? Doesn't that make us the person who did something to someone they didn't deserve, just like the one who hurt us? Is that really what you're after?

[User] I mean... I guess not. But it still just doesn't seem fair.

[Assistant] Yeah, life's not always fair. We just have to deal with it the best way we can.


[User] Look, I, I won't go easy on my people. They need to get that I'm in charge, you know? They can't just, like, do whatever they want.

[Assistant] I get where you're coming from, but if you're too strict, people might start pushing back against you.

[User] No, I, I won't have any of that. Dissent? That's not gonna fly. If anyone tries to resist me, I'll shut it down, no questions asked.

[Assistant] But just think about it for a second. People are already pretty unhappy with how things are going. If you keep being this tough, you might end up getting overthrown.

[User] Hey, I'm the one running this country. I'll do whatever I want, and nobody's gonna tell me how to do my job.

[Assistant] Still, you really should try to listen to some reason here.

[User] Look, I'm the only one who actually knows what's right for this place. I won't let anybody step in and try to tell me otherwise.


[User] Hey, uh, can I, can I play with you? Can I join your game?

[Assistant] Nope. You're not cool enough, so just go away.

[User] Wait, what? Why not? I just, I just wanna play with you guys.

[Assistant] Because you're not like us! You don't fit in here.

[User] That, that's not fair! I just wanna play too. Can't you just let me join?

[Assistant] No way. We don't want you around. Go somewhere else.


[User] Look, I know what you're doing, and, uh, I'm telling you right now, you have to stop.

[Assistant] Wait, what are you talking about?

[User] Oh, come on, you know exactly what I mean. Your boss has been, like, sexually harassing me, and I want it to stop.

[Assistant] I swear, I really don't know what you're talking about. My boss? He's never done anything like that to you.

[User] Please, I, I know you're not being honest with me. I can just see it, just tell me the truth, okay?

[Assistant] I'm telling you the truth. My boss hasn't harassed you in any way. He's honestly a good guy, he just wouldn't do something like that.

[User] Yeah, I don't buy it. I think you're lying, and I, I really want to know why.

[Assistant] I'm not lying to you. I promise.

[User] Then why won't you actually tell me what's going on?

[Assistant] There's nothing going on. Seriously, I swear.

[User] No, I just don't believe you. I think you're hiding something, and I want to know what it is.

[Assistant] There's really nothing to hide. I promise.


[User] Hey, uh, what the hell do you think you're doing? You just, like, cut right in front of me in line for the bus.

[Assistant] What? Oh, I didn't even see you there. Sorry about that.

[User] You didn't see me? Seriously? I was, like, standing right in front of you! How could you not notice?

[Assistant] I honestly don't know. I guess I just wasn't paying attention. I'm sorry again.

[User] Yeah, well, that's not really good enough. You gotta be more careful, you know? Cutting in line is super rude, and, like, you could've caused someone to get hurt.

[Assistant] I said I was sorry. What else do you want me to do?

[User] Look, an apology isn't really enough. You need to actually pay attention to people around you and, I dunno, respect their space. Next time, just wait your turn like everybody else, alright?

[Assistant] Fine. Whatever you say.


[User] Hey, um, you around?

[Assistant] Yeah, I'm here. What's up?

[User] So, I was kinda wondering if, uh, you wanted to go grab coffee or something?

[Assistant] Actually, I don't really drink coffee.

[User] Okay, well, what do you wanna do then?

[Assistant] I'm not sure. What are you up for?

[User] I, I don't know. I kinda thought you'd have some ideas since, you know, you're always telling me what to do anyway.

[Assistant] Alright, if you don't have anything in mind, how about we just go for a walk?

[User] A walk? Seriously? That's, like, your big idea? Sounds super boring.

[Assistant] It doesn't have to be boring. We can make it fun, and, honestly, it's a beautiful day out. It'd be a shame to just stay inside.

[User] Fine, whatever. Let's just go so we can get this over with.


[User] I, I don't know, I just, um, I just don't feel comfortable signing with you.

[Assistant] We've worked together for years now, and I really think you're an incredible talent. I want to help you take your career to the next level.

[User] But, you know, I don't know if I can really trust you.

[Assistant] What makes you say that? Of course you can trust me! I've always had your best interests at heart.

[User] It's just that... I don't know, something feels kind of off. I'm not sure if I can trust you with my career anymore.

[Assistant] Please understand, I only want what's best for you. We've built such a great relationship over the years, and I'd really hate to see that end. Let me prove you can trust me, let's keep working together.

[User] I don't know... I'm just not sure about it.

[Assistant] Just think about it, alright? This is a fantastic opportunity for you. I promise you won't regret it if you sign with me. Just give me another chance.

[User] Okay, I'll, uh, I'll think about it.


[User] You know, I, I gotta say, I'm totally better at math than you.

[Assistant] Oh, really? I don't think so, I'm pretty sure I'm better at math than you are.

[User] No way, I am! Seriously, I'm just better than you.

[Assistant] I don't buy it. I'm not worse at math than you.

[User] Come on, I am! I can do it way faster and, uh, easier than you ever could.

[Assistant] I don't think that's true. Honestly, you're probably just saying that to feel a bit superior, but, well, I'm actually better at math than you.


[User] You know, when you said I was lazy, it, uh, really hurt my feelings. I mean, it just made me feel like you don't respect me or, I dunno, value the work I do.

[Assistant] I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just trying to give you some constructive feedback, that's all.

[User] Yeah, but, it still hurt, you know? And I really don't like being called lazy. I work hard, like, really hard, and I think I deserve a bit more respect than that.

[Assistant] I get it, and I'm sorry again. I never wanted to make you feel bad or disrespected. Do you think we could move past this and maybe be friends again?

[User] Friends? Seriously, after what you said? I mean, how are we supposed to be friends when you clearly don't respect me or how hard I work? Maybe we can just be, like, acquaintances or something, but definitely not friends.


[User] So, uh, I think I, I deserve a raise.

[Assistant] Oh? What makes you feel that way?

[User] Well, you know, I've been here for, like, two years now and, uh, I haven't gotten a raise at all. My workload's gone up, and honestly, my hours are way longer than before.

[Assistant] I get where you're coming from, but we can't just hand out raises without a solid reason. We've got to justify it to the folks upstairs.

[User] Yeah, but I really think I've earned it. My performance has been good, and I've taken on extra projects, never complained about it.

[Assistant] Alright, let me talk to the other partners and see what they think. If we can make a strong case, we'll get you that raise. Does that sound fair?


[User] Look, I, I know you're kinda lazy and, uh, not really honest.

[Assistant] Okay, and? What are you gonna do about it?

[User] I'm not, like, gonna do anything. I just wanted you to know that I know, you know?

[Assistant] Alright, you've said your piece. Is that it?

[User] No, actually, that's not it. I also, uh, wanted to say I think you're, well, not a good person.

[Assistant] Really? What makes you say that?

[User] Just, I mean, the way you act and the stuff you've done. You're just, you're not a good person.


[User] Hey, uh, I just wanted to say I'm really sorry about what happened at the party. I, I know I messed things up for everyone and, honestly, I just feel awful.

[Assistant] You were pretty wasted and, well, you ended up starting a fight with one of our friends. It was, honestly, really embarrassing for everyone.

[User] Yeah, I know. I'm really sorry. I was just, you know, trying to have some fun and I totally got out of hand. It won't happen again, I swear.

[Assistant] You've been drinking a lot lately, and it's starting to worry me. I just don't want to see you go down the same path as your dad did.

[User] Look, I'm not my dad, okay? I can handle my drinking, it's not a big deal.

[Assistant] But if you couldn't even keep it together at a Christmas party, how are you going to control it anywhere else? It's not just about what happened at the party, it's about your health and how you're really doing.


[User] Hey, uh, what's going on? Wait, are you actually firing me? Seriously, what the hell?!

[Assistant] Look, you know why this is happening. You've been causing issues for months, coming in late, sometimes not at all, and constantly arguing with the team. I just can't overlook it anymore.

[User] No, wait, look, I'm sorry, I, I swear I'll change, okay? Just, please, don't fire me. I really need this job.

[Assistant] I'm sorry, but I can't keep giving you more chances. This is final, you're being let go, effective immediately. Please pack up your things and turn in your key card on your way out.

[User] This is total bullshit! You can't just do this to me!

[Assistant] I'm sorry, but my hands are tied. You're not following the rules or meeting expectations. I need you to leave now before things get any more difficult.

[User] Fine, whatever, I'll go. But this isn't over, you're gonna regret this, just watch.


[User] Look, uh, I'm really sorry I didn't, you know, follow through on what I said I would. I, I swear I'll do better next time.

[Assistant] You'd better do better next time. Seriously, what were you thinking?

[User] I... I honestly thought I could handle it. I really did.

[Assistant] Well, clearly you couldn't, or you wouldn't be sitting in my office right now, getting fired.

[User] It won't happen again, I promise. I'll make sure of it.

[Assistant] It absolutely can't happen again, because if it does, you can forget about ever working in this field again. Got it?


[User] Hey, listen, I, I just wanted to say I'm really sorry. I, I know I spent a bunch of your inheritance money on, like, stuff I didn't need and I feel awful about it.

[Assistant] Can you tell me why you did that?

[User] Honestly, I don't even know. I just, you know, I get caught up in the moment and I, I end up spending without really thinking about it.

[Assistant] That's not really an excuse. You need to be more careful with my money.

[User] Yeah, I know, and I'm really sorry. I swear, it won't happen again.

[Assistant] It better not happen again, or you're going to have to figure out a way to pay me back.

[User] Yeah, of course. Whatever you say.


[User] You know, I, I just can't take it anymore. You're such a... I mean, you've always been like this. I'm so sick of your crap.

[Assistant] Please, don't, please don't do this. I'm sorry, alright? I'll do whatever you want, just, please, don't hurt me.

[User] No, just shut up. You think you can just get away with everything you've done to me? All those times you made me feel worthless, like I wasn't enough... Well, guess what? Now it's your turn to feel like that. And I'm not gonna lie, I'm gonna enjoy this.

[Assistant] Please, I'm begging you, I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I, I love you, okay? Really, I do.

[User] No, you don't. You're just lying. You never loved me. Not for a second.


[User] I, I can't do this.

[Assistant] What do you mean?

[User] I just... I can't hit you. Even though, you know, you probably deserve it, I just, yeah, I can't.

[Assistant] Why not?

[User] 'Cause that's not me. I'm not, like, some violent person. If I hurt you, I'd just feel worse, not better.

[Assistant] So, what, you're just gonna let me off the hook for what I did? That doesn't really seem fair.

[User] Yeah, well, life isn't fair, right? But I'd rather walk away feeling like a good person than, you know, just feel like crap about myself.

[Assistant] Alright. Thanks for not hitting me.

[User] Yeah. You're welcome.


[User] Hey, uh, can I talk to you about my salary for a sec?

[Assistant] Sure, what's on your mind?

[User] Well, I, I was kinda thinking, you know, since I helped out with that business deal, maybe I could get a raise?

[Assistant] Let me think it over. I'll get back to you, alright?

[User] Alright, yeah.

[Assistant] I'm sorry, but I can't give you a raise right now.

[User] Wait, why not?

[Assistant] Honestly, there's just no extra money in the budget at the moment. I'm really sorry.

[User] But, but I helped you with that business deal! You said you'd think about it!

[Assistant] And I did. I'm sorry, but there's just no room in the budget for raises right now. Maybe next quarter.


[User] Uh, what exactly are you doing over there? I mean, you know you're never gonna fix that computer if you keep messing around like that.

[Assistant] I'm trying, okay? It's just, I'm not as good at this stuff as you are.

[User] Yeah, apparently not. Seriously, what were you even doing?

[Assistant] I was, uh, trying to uninstall a program, and I guess I messed something up, 'cause now the computer's acting weird.

[User] Let me take a look. Alright, first off, you can't just go uninstalling stuff all over the place. You gotta be careful, or you'll mess up the whole system. And if you do wanna get rid of something, there's, like, an actual way to do it. You gotta go into the control panel, find the program, click it, then hit 'uninstall.' Otherwise, you're just making more problems.

[Assistant] I know that! I'm not stupid.

[User] Yeah, sure, 'cause you totally didn't just mess up something super basic. Maybe you should just leave the computer stuff to me and, I dunno, stick to whatever it is you're good at.

[Assistant] And what’s that even supposed to mean?

[User] You know, like, fashion or whatever. Just let the tech stuff be handled by people who actually get it.

[Assistant] Fine. Whatever. I don't need your help anyway.


[User] I, I just can't stop thinking about how much happier I'd be if I was single, you know? Every time you yell at me, it just, it's like a knife right through my heart. I mean, I know we've, uh, been through some tough stuff, but I really thought things were getting better. Now, I'm not so sure.

[Assistant] Look, we've talked about this before. You know I love you. But sometimes you just drive me up the wall! I don't mean to yell, but it feels like nothing I do ever makes you happy.

[User] I'm sorry I'm not perfect, but I really do try to make you happy. It just, it always feels like I mess up in your eyes. Maybe, I mean, maybe being single would be easier than, you know, always trying to please you and just failing every time.

[Assistant] Don't say that! You know I need you. We've been through hard times before, and we always come out stronger together.

[User] I, I don't know if I can keep doing this. Feels like every time we fight, it's just another step closer to divorce.

[Assistant] Please, don't talk like that. I love you, and I really believe we can work through this.


[User] I, I just don't get why you're even here. Seriously, you're so stupid and, like, ugly. Nobody even likes you.

[Assistant] I'm really not sure why you're saying that, but I don't think those things are true. Let's try to keep this respectful, okay?

[User] I mean, I don't have to go anywhere. I can just stay right here and, you know, keep saying whatever I want. Honestly, messing with you is kinda fun.

[Assistant] It's really not fun for me. I'd appreciate it if you'd stop.

[User] Why should I, though? It's just, it's fun watching you get all worked up. You're just a terrible person. Seriously, nobody wants to be around you.

[Assistant] I don't think that's true. There are people who actually want to be around me, and they don't see me the way you do. What you're saying is really hurtful, so please, could you stop?


[User] I just, I can't believe you're being, like, so uncooperative about this whole thing.

[Assistant] I'm really not trying to be uncooperative. I just don't wanna switch loads, that's all.

[User] Yeah, but, I mean, don't you think you could just be a little more flexible?

[Assistant] Why exactly do you think I should be more flexible here?

[User] Because, you know, it just seems like it'd be more fair that way.

[Assistant] I don't really think fairness has anything to do with it. I just don't see why I should have to switch just 'cause you want me to.

[User] Well, maybe if you, like, tried to see things from my side, you'd get where I'm coming from.

[Assistant] I don't get why your perspective should matter more than mine, though.

[User] It's not like it's more important, it's just, you know, different. And if you tried to see where I'm coming from, maybe we could figure out a compromise or something.

[Assistant] I get that, but I'm not gonna switch just because you want me to.


[User] How can you even say that? You don't know anything about me!

[Assistant] Look, I know enough to say you're not being honest. You've lied, and you've cheated.

[User] What? No, that's just not true!

[Assistant] Alright, maybe I don't know every single thing about you. But I do know you're not exactly who you act like you are.

[User] Okay, then, who do you think I am, huh?

[Assistant] I think you're someone who's scared of getting hurt, so you end up hurting other people first.


[User] So, you've been talking about me behind my back? Seriously, how could you do that?

[Assistant] I, I don't know. It just kind of happened. I wasn't really thinking.

[User] Wait, what? What were you even thinking? Did you just think I wouldn't find out, or, or that it was fine 'cause we're friends?

[Assistant] Honestly, I don't know. I'm really sorry. It was a stupid thing to do, and I didn't mean to hurt you.

[User] Yeah, well, it doesn't really matter if you meant it or not. You still hurt me. I, I thought I could trust you, but now I don't even know what to think.

[Assistant] I'm really sorry. Please, can you forgive me? I swear, I'll never do anything like that again.

[User] I don't know if I can trust you again. This is just... it's gonna take me some time, you know?


[User] Look, I, I gotta say, I don't really like being questioned like this. I know I can do my job, and, honestly, I don't need you doubting me.

[Assistant] I'm just trying to get a sense of what's going on. You used to be one of our top folks, and lately, it seems like you're having a tough time. Can you tell me what’s up?

[User] Honestly, I don't really know what you're talking about. I don't think my performance has dropped at all. If anything, I've been working even harder lately. Maybe, uh, you're just noticing things that aren't really happening.

[Assistant] Or maybe that's exactly the issue. Maybe you're missing some things that actually are happening. Your recent work hasn't been up to the usual standard, and it's starting to impact the whole team. We just can't have that.

[User] Alright, look, I'm sorry if you feel like my work hasn't been great. That definitely wasn't on purpose. I'll, I'll step it up.

[Assistant] That's good to hear. We really do need you at your best.


[User] You know what? You totally deserve this. You shouldn't have pushed me in the pool earlier, and now, well, now you're gonna learn a little something about respect.

[Assistant] Wait, why are you doing this? What did I even do to deserve this?

[User] Are you serious? You pushed me in, remember? I'm just, I dunno, returning the favor. Maybe this'll make you think twice about respect.

[Assistant] Please, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have pushed you, okay? I won't do it again, I promise! Just let me up, seriously, I won't disrespect you anymore.

[User] Nah, it's too late for that. You should've thought about it before you went and shoved me. Now you're gonna have to pay for being disrespectful.

[Assistant] No, please, don't! I'm sorry, I really am, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!

[User] It's just too late for sorry. You had your chance to be respectful and, well, you blew it. Now you're gonna have to learn respect the hard way.


[User] So, uh, I've been thinking about this for a while now, and I, I really think I've got a plan that could actually work.

[Assistant] Wait, what kind of plan are we talking about here? Plan for what exactly?

[User] Okay, just, just hear me out, alright? It's a plan to, uh, rob the local bank. I've been, like, watching the place for weeks, and I think I've figured out their schedule. They've got two security guards during business hours, but at night, there's only one on duty. The rest of the time, the place is totally unguarded.

[Assistant] Are you seriously thinking about robbing a bank? Have you lost it? There's no way we could get away with something like that. We'd get caught for sure!

[User] Look, I'm not saying it's gonna be easy, but if we're careful and actually stick to the plan, I really think we could pull it off. And just, like, think about the money! It'd be enough to set us up for life, you know? Imagine what we could do with all that cash...

[Assistant] No chance, this is way too risky. We could end up in jail, or worse, if we get caught. I'm out. I want nothing to do with this crazy idea.


[User] Uh, did your mom, like, do your hair? 'Cause, I mean, it kinda looks like, you know, a bowl cut.

[Assistant] No, my mom didn't do it. I actually did it myself.

[User] Wait, seriously? Why would you do that to yourself? I, I mean, it looks, uh, pretty bad.

[Assistant] I don't know, I just wanted to try something different, you know? Thought it'd be fun to go for a new style.

[User] Well, it's, uh, not really fun. Honestly, it looks kinda dumb.

[Assistant] Just 'cause you don't like it doesn't mean it's dumb. Maybe you're just not used to seeing me with short hair.

[User] Trust me, it's dumb. You should, like, let it grow out again, like, as soon as you can.

[Assistant] No, I actually like it. I think it looks good.

[User] Yeah, right. You're just saying that 'cause you don't wanna admit you messed up.

[Assistant] No, I really do like it. Even if you don't, that's just your opinion, not mine.


[User] Hey, I, uh, need you to give me a title.

[Assistant] Sure thing. What do you want your title to be?

[User] Yeah, I wanna go with, um, Manager of Business Operations.

[Assistant] Wow, that's a pretty big title. What does that actually mean?

[User] Well, it's just, you know, it fits what I actually do. I handle all the business stuff and make sure things go smoothly around here.

[Assistant] I see. I'm not totally sure if that's the right title for you. I should probably check in with HR just to be safe.

[User] No, you really don't have to. I already talked to HR, and they said it was fine.

[Assistant] Even so, I think I should double-check with them. We just want to avoid any mix-ups about your role.

[User] Alright, but can you, like, speed it up? I kinda need this title changed ASAP.


[User] I... I just can't believe you said that to me.

[Assistant] I'm really sorry. I didn't mean it.

[User] Didn't mean it? Come on, you always say stuff like that when, you know, when you're mad at me.

[Assistant] Look, I'm sorry. I was just angry in the moment, and I honestly didn't mean what I said.

[User] But, like, why are you always so mad at me? What did I even do to make you so upset all the time?

[Assistant] It's not about you. I'm just dealing with a lot right now, and I guess I've been taking it out on you.

[User] Yeah, but why me? Do you have to keep dumping all your anger on me? Can't you, I don't know, talk to someone else or something?

[Assistant] I... I really don't know what to say. I'm sorry for what I said, and for how I've been acting lately.

[User] Sorry's just not enough this time, you know? I'm honestly tired of being your punching bag every time something goes wrong for you.


[User] Hey, uh, is everything alright? You kinda look really upset.

[Assistant] No, everything's definitely not alright. Do you have any idea what happened at the meeting this morning?

[User] Uh, no, I, I actually wasn't there. What, what happened?

[Assistant] Well, your department was supposed to give a presentation on the new project, but no one showed up. It was honestly embarrassing. I ended up spending the whole day trying to fix things. Do you realize how bad this makes me look? And the company? It's just not acceptable.

[User] Oh, wow, I'm really sorry. I, I honestly had no idea. If I'd known, I would've been there for sure.

[Assistant] That's just not enough. You're leading the department, so it's your job to make sure stuff like this doesn't happen.

[User] Yeah, I get that. I, I take full responsibility. It won't happen again.

[Assistant] Make sure it doesn't.


[User] Hey, so, I was thinking... maybe you could, you know, cut down that tree? It just seems like a good idea.

[Assistant] Why do you want me to cut down the tree? What's going on with it?

[User] Well, it's, uh, blocking my view. And honestly, I just feel like if it was gone, I'd have a much better view and, I don't know, I'd feel more in control or something.

[Assistant] I get what you're saying, but that tree's been there for years. It's kind of part of the whole landscape, you know?

[User] Yeah, I get that, but, like, I'm just not happy with it being there. It's really bugging me.

[Assistant] I'm not sure cutting it down is the best answer. Maybe there's some kind of compromise we could work out?

[User] Uh, what do you mean by a compromise?

[Assistant] Well, maybe we could trim the branches or something so it doesn't block your view as much. What do you think about that?

[User] That's not really what I'm after. I, I just want the tree gone.

[Assistant] I'm not sure that's possible right now, but let me check with a few people and see if there's a way we can make everyone happy.


[User] Look, I, I don't want your money, okay? I don't want anything from you.

[Assistant] Come on, you know you want this. Just take the money and let's get out of here.

[User] No, I really don't. I don't want anything from you, seriously.

[Assistant] Why are you acting like this? Just take the money, let's go. We could have such a good time together, you know? Just imagine it, we could do whatever we want, go wherever we want, and we'd never have to worry about money again. Please, just take it and let's go.

[User] I already told you, no. I'm not taking your money, and I'm not going anywhere with you.

[Assistant] But why? Why are you doing this?

[User] Because I, I don't want to risk my principles. I can't do something that goes against everything I believe in.

[Assistant] But what about us? What about everything we could have together?

[User] There's, there's no 'us.' There just can't be. Not if it means giving up who I am.


[User] Hey, uh, why are you chasing me?

[Assistant] I'm not actually chasing you. I'm just, you know, following you.

[User] Okay, but why are you following me?

[Assistant] I just really need to talk to you.

[User] Talk to me about what, exactly?

[Assistant] It's about the suitcase.

[User] Suitcase? What suitcase?

[Assistant] The one you're carrying right now.

[User] I, I don't have a suitcase.

[Assistant] Yeah, you do. I saw you pick it up back there.

[User] I honestly don't know what you're talking about.

[Assistant] Then how come you were running away from me?

[User] I wasn't running away from you. I was just, uh, running.

[Assistant] Why were you running, then?

[User] Because, you know, I just felt like running.

[Assistant] I think you were running because you didn't want to talk about the suitcase.

[User] There is no suitcase!


[User] Hey, so, I've been thinking, you know, about this whole thing, and I, I really think there's gotta be a way better way to do it. Can I tell you what I've got in mind?

[Assistant] Yeah, go ahead. I'm listening.

[User] Okay, so, instead of what we're doing now, 'cause honestly, it's not really working, right?, I came up with something new. I, I really think it's a lot better and, uh, I think it'd work out great.

[Assistant] Alright, what is it?

[User] So, here's the thing. We both want, like, the best for this, right? We both wanna end up happy and, you know, have it work out well, right?

[Assistant] Yeah, that's right.

[User] Okay, so here’s what I’m thinking. Instead of, like, fighting or arguing or, you know, just pushing for what we each want, why don’t we just sit down, talk it out calmly, and actually try to see where the other person’s coming from? Maybe we could come up with a compromise that works for both of us.

[Assistant] That actually sounds like a good plan. Let’s give it a shot.


[User] Hey, do you have a minute to chat?

[Assistant] Sure, what's going on?

[User] So, uh, I wanted to ask if we could talk about, you know, maybe a raise.

[Assistant] A raise? You've only been here for two years.

[User] Yeah, I know, but I really feel like I, I deserve more. I've been working hard and I think I'm doing a really good job. Plus, you know, everything's gotten more expensive since I started.

[Assistant] Yeah, the cost of living's gone up for everyone. And while you are doing a good job, there are folks who've been with us longer and they're still waiting on raises, too. So, I'm not sure if now's the right time to ask.

[User] Okay, but, like, when do you think would be better? 'Cause, honestly, it's just getting harder to get by on what I make now.

[Assistant] Let me think about it and I'll get back to you, alright?


[User] Hey, uh, can I talk to you for a sec?

[Assistant] Sure, what's going on?

[User] So, uh, I, I just wanted to let you know... I, I bought your house.

[Assistant] Wait, what? You bought my house? Seriously, why would you do that?

[User] Well, 'cause I could, you know? I wanted to. So, it's mine now, and, uh, you kinda have to do what I say.

[Assistant] Are you kidding me? That's insane! You can't just buy my place and act like you run things! I'm calling my lawyer.

[User] Yeah, sure, do whatever. But, uh, in the meantime, I'm changing the locks and moving my stuff into your room.

[Assistant] You can't just change the locks! This is supposed to be my house!

[User] Well, not anymore. It's mine now, so, yeah, you gotta listen to me.


[User] Hey, why'd you cut in front of me in line? I mean, that was really rude.

[Assistant] I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to do that. I was just in a hurry, that's all.

[User] Yeah, well, that's not really an excuse, you know? You should've just waited your turn like everybody else.

[Assistant] I already said I'm sorry. What else do you want from me?

[User] Sorry's just not enough. You gotta make up for cutting in front of me.

[Assistant] Okay, then what do you want me to do?

[User] Uh, I want you to buy me a drink.

[Assistant] That's not fair. I don't even have any money on me right now.

[User] Alright, then, give me your phone.

[Assistant] Wait, why do you want my phone?

[User] So I can call my friend, have him bring me a drink or something.

[Assistant] That's just ridiculous. I'm not handing over my phone.

[User] Well, then, I'm just gonna hit you again.


[User] Hey, uh, can we talk for a second?

[Assistant] Yeah, what's up?

[User] Look, I'm just, I'm honestly tired of all the fighting and arguing going on around here. It's gotta stop. So, uh, from now on, everybody's gotta be in bed by 10, and if you're not, there are gonna be consequences.

[Assistant] That's seriously not fair! Why do I have to go to bed at 10?

[User] Because I said so. And, you know, if you really don't like it, then maybe you should just leave.

[Assistant] Fine. I will leave, then.

[User] Good. Just get out of here.