Emi: Am I doing it right?
Quark: You don't have to be quite so gentle.
Emi: Tell me again.
Quark: Tell you about what?
Emi: About the stem bolts.
Quark: I have one hundred gross of self-sealing stem bolts sitting in Cargo bay eleven.
Emi: And they're all mine?
Quark: For only ten bars of gold-pressed latinum.
Emi: Quark, you don't know how much this means to me.
Quark: You don't know how much this means to me.
Emi: With those stem bolts, my family will be able to triple production of our reverse-ratcheting routing planers.
Quark: Glad to be of help.
Emi: Quark, I can't wait any longer. Why don't you and I go down to Cargo bay eleven and sign the contract?
Quark: No need to rush. Your family's ship won't be here for a week. We'll have plenty of time to finalize the deal before then.
Emi: That's an unusual attitude for a Ferengi.
Quark: I'm a very unusual Ferengi.
Quark: That must be the Saurian brandy I ordered. Enter.
Quark: Rom? Where's my brandy?
Rom: Forget the brandy, brother. You must leave here immediately. And that goes for the female as well.
Emi: Is something wrong?
Quark: There's nothing wrong. Have you lost your mind? She's willing, she's wealthy, and she's wants to buy our stem bolts.
Rom: It's going to have to wait. Something important has come up.
Quark: Right now, nothing is more important than this.
Quark: Grand Nagus Zek.
Rom: As big as life.
Quark: Go. Go!
Quark: What does Zek want with me?
Rom: Looks like he's moving in with you, brother.
Sisko: Sisko to Bashir.
Bashir: This is Bashir.
Sisko: Doctor, please report to the wardroom immediately.
Bashir: On my way.
Bashir: What's this?
Dax: Champagne.
Sisko: Congratulations, Doctor.
Bashir: Well thank you. Now will someone please tell me what's going on?
Sisko: The Federation Medical Council has announced the nominees for this year's Carrington Award. And the nominees are, Doctor April Wade of the University of Nairobi, Healer Senva of the Vulcan Medical Institute, Doctor Henri Roget of the Central Hospital of Altair Four, Chirurgeon Ghee P'Trell of Andoria, and Doctor Julian Bashir, Chief Medical Officer of Starbase Deep Space Nine. Good luck.
Bashir: There must be some mistake. As far as I know, my name wasn't even up for consideration.
Dax: Oh, it was up for consideration. I submitted it myself through an old friend of Curzon's.
Kira: You deserve the nomination, Doctor. Your work on biomolecular replication was both audacious and groundbreaking. According to Dax, anyway. She's the only one who understands it.
O'Brien: So, how does it feel to be the youngest nominee in the history of the Carrington award?
Bashir: It feels good. Excuse me, I've got to finish some work.
Bashir: What exactly is it you want me to say?
Dax: I want you to say that you are thrilled beyond belief to be nominated for the Federation's most prestigious medical award.
Bashir: Believe me, I'm honored to have been nominated.
Dax: Well you're not acting like it.
Bashir: It's just that I don't want everyone to make a big deal out of it.
Dax: It is a big deal. We're all proud of you.
Bashir: I'm glad, but before you agonize over the next few days over the board's decision, I want to assure you that I'm not going to win.
Dax: You don't know that. The work you've been doing deserves to be recognized.
Bashir: This isn't about my work. Do you know what the life expectancy of a Carrington Award winner is? Five years. Ten at the very best. And do you know why? Because the Carrington Award is intended to be the crowning achievement for a lifetime in medicine. April Wade is a hundred and six. The last time she was nominated, three years ago, people said it was premature.
Dax: You're exaggerating.
Bashir: Maybe, a little. But the undeniable truth is I am way too young to be a serious contender for the Carrington. Now, put my name up for nomination in seventy years, and I promise you I will get very excited. But until then, I don't plan on giving it much thought.
Dax: That's a very mature attitude.
Bashir: You sound surprised.
Dax: I'm actually astonished, but impressed.
Bashir: So then we don't have to dwell on it for the next three days.
Dax: I won't mention it again.
Bashir: I appreciate that, Jadzia.
Dax: So who do you think is going to win? Wade or P'Trell?
Quark: A cup of millipede juice, hold the shells.
Quark: Rom! Rom! Rom!
Rom: Did you call me, brother?
Quark: Would it be too much trouble for you to put these empty bottles in the replicator?
Rom: Keeping my quarters clean is Nog's job.
Quark: Except Nog is on the Homeworld visiting his grandmother.
Rom: Then cleaning will just have to wait until he gets back.
Quark: No it won't. Until the Nagus gives me back my own quarters this is my home too, and I've had enough of this mess. Clean it up. Now.
Rom: I won't.
Quark: Yes, you will. It's bad enough I've to put up with your constant teeth grinding every night, and your incessant ear-picking. But I will not tolerate living like some Pakled refuse merchant for another. Wait a minute. This is a bottle of Aldeberan whiskey.
Rom: Let me, brother.
Quark: I recognize this label. This is from my private stock.
Rom: No, it's not.
Quark: It most certainly is. Wait a minute. What's that over there?
Rom: Trixian bubble juice?
Quark: Nog's favorite. This came from my stockroom, didn't it?
Rom: Are you accusing my son of being a thief?
Quark: No, I'm accusing you of being a thief. These table linens, this chair, that table, everything in here comes from my bar.
Rom: Not everything.
Quark: As soon as you're done cleaning up, I'm going to conduct a complete inventory and find out exactly what you've stolen from me. Now get to work.
Rom: No. I refuse. I work for you all day, brother, but here I'm the boss. You want this place cleaned up, do it yourself.
Quark: What I want is my own quarters back.
Rom: That makes two of us. Living with you was bad enough when we were children.
Quark: What do I do?
Rom: You think.
Quark: What do you mean, I think?
Rom: You stay up late every night, plotting and scheming. And when you think, you mumble. And if there's anything I can't stand, it's listening to you mumble.
Quark: That does it. I've been accommodating long enough. If the Nagus wants to stay on the station, he's going to have to find someplace else to live.
Rom: Are you sure this is a good idea? No one's seen the Nagus since he got here. He must be working on something important. If you disturb him, he might get very angry.
Quark: I'm not going to disturb him. You are.
Rom: Me? Why not you?
Quark: Zek likes me, so I can't afford to get on his bad side. On the other hand, he barely acknowledges your existence, so you have nothing to lose. Now get in there and tell the Nagus he'll have to leave. And whatever happens, don't let Maihar'du intimidate you.
Rom: Where are you going?
Quark: Don't worry. If you need me, I'll be close by.
Zek: Rom! What can I do for you, my boy?
Rom: Grand Nagus, forgive me for disturbing you.
Zek: Who's disturbed? I've been hoping someone would drop by. Now come right in.
Quark: Why thank you. We'd be delighted.
Zek: Quark. I knew you'd be lurking around here someplace. Well, what are we standing out here for? I've got something very exciting to show you both.
Quark: What happened to my furniture?
Zek: I got rid of it. It was getting in the way of my work.
Quark: And what work was that, Grand Nagus? If I my be so bold?
Zek: I'm glad you asked. Maihar'du, the book.
Zek: You are about to read the shining triumph of my life. The one thing I'll always be remembered for.
Quark: May I?
Zek: By all means.
Quark: The Rules of Acquisition, Revised for the Modern Ferengi. You rewrote the Rules of Acquisition?
Zek: I hope you like them. Absorb, enjoy.
Quark: Rom, you know what this means?
Rom: Yes. It means we're going to have to memorize a whole new set of Rules.
Quark: No, you idiot. It means we'll be the first Ferengi to benefit from Zek's wisdom. The knowledge contained in this book could make us both rich beyond our wildest dreams.
Rom: I'll be able to go into business for myself. Turn the page, brother. Turn the page.
Quark: The first Rule of Acquisition is
Rom: Go on.
Quark: If they want their money back
Rom: Yes, yes?
Quark: Give it to them.
Rom: If they want their money back give it to them?
Rom: Rule number twenty one. Never place profit before friendship. Rule number twenty tour. Latinum tarnishes, but family is forever. Rule twenty three. Money can never replace dignity.
Quark: Oh, skip to the end. Well, what is it?
Rom: You're not going to like it, Brother.
Quark: I can take it. Tell me.
Rom: Rule number two hundred and eighty five. A good deed is its own reward.
Rom: Brother, are you all right?
Quark: I just have to sit down.
Quark: No, take it away.
Rom: Sorry.
Quark: Got to think. Got to think. There has to be some explanation, a reason for why he's doing this.
Rom: Maybe we should ask him.
Quark: No. Don't you see? He's testing us. Yes, that must be it. It's some kind of test. The book, the book.
Rom: You want to hear more?
Quark: No, but it must be some kind of code. Read me the first word of every Rule.
Rom: If. Never. Keep. Profit. A. Good. Smile. Honesty.
Quark: If never keep profit a good smile honesty.
Rom: What does it mean, brother?
Quark: It means absolutely nothing. Maybe if we hold the pages up to the light. No, no.
Quark: No, that's not it. The answer must be right in front of us.
Rom: I know. Maybe the Nagus has gone insane.
Quark: Nonsense. The Nagus is the most brilliant Ferengi alive. I've modeled my life after him. Don't ever let me hear you speak that way about him again.
Rom: But what if he really believes all this?
Quark: How could he believe this insanity? No. It has to be part of some brilliant, twisted, devious plan. The Nagus isn't like you and me, Rom. He thinks ten, sometimes twenty, steps ahead. These Rules are probably the key component in some vast plot to seize financial control of the entire quadrant.
Rom: So what do we do?
Quark: The only thing we can do. We put down this book and we walk away. And when the Nagus feels ready, he'll inform us of his plans. But until then, we have to act as if we know nothing.
Rom: I can do that.
Quark: If never keep profit a good smile honesty. Nah.
Zek: Quark, my boy. What say we buy everyone a drink? Put it on my tab.
Quark: But why?
Zek: It will make everyone happy. And that will make me happy.
Rom: It must all be part of his plan. Wheels within wheels, brother.
Quark: Drinks for everyone, compliments of the Grand Nagus. Is there anything else I get you, Nagus? We just got in a shipment of quality Hupyrian beetle snuff.
Zek: Actually, I've lost my taste for beetle snuff. It might be fun for you and me, but it's no fun for the beetles. Oh, and by the way, Quark, I just met the most lovely young female. She came by your quarters looking for you.
Quark: Was her name Emi, by any chance?
Zek: She wanted me to tell you that her family's ship has arrived with the latinum.
Quark: It's about time. Rom, watch the bar. We're finally going to get rid of those stem bolts.
Zek: I don't think so.
Quark: But we have a contract.
Zek: Which was never signed. And frankly, Quark, you were charging an outrageous price for those stem bolts.
Quark: She didn't seem to think so.
Zek: Well, she did once I explained it to her.
Quark: You what?
Zek: Well, I couldn't allow you take advantage of an innocent young female like that, Quark. So I told her where she could get all the stem bolts she needed at wholesale.
Quark: Wholesale? He told her where to get them at wholesale. What am I going to do with a hundred gross of stem bolts?
Rom: My poor brother.
Zek: Oh, don't worry about him. Eventually, he'll sell those stem bolts at a fair price.
Rom: A fair price? I'm very confused.
Zek: That's understandable. It'll take some time to get used to the new ways.
Rom: New ways?
Zek: Walk with me, Rom.
O'Brien: Your turn.
Bashir: I don't know about this.
O'Brien: Would you rather play a game of racquetball?
Bashir: Chief, since Keiko's been on Bajor we've played one hundred and six games of racquetball.
O'Brien: Right. So throw a dart.
Bashir: I'm a bit rusty.
O'Brien: So am I. I guess the smart money's on Wade or P'Trell.
Bashir: That seems to be the general consensus.
O'Brien: I mean, Doctor Wade is very popular but P'Trell is doing some amazing work in gerontological research. Which one do you think will win?
Bashir: Either of them would be a worthy recipient of the Carrington.
O'Brien: Of course, if I had my druthers, the award'd go to you.
Bashir: Thank you.
O'Brien: But let's face it. You don't stand a chance.
Bashir: You don't say.
O'Brien: I mean, I know you're talented, but I bet there're doctors all over the Federation saying, Julian Bashir? Who the hell is he?
Bashir: Chief, you are absolutely right.
O'Brien: I'm glad you agree.
Bashir: So, how much longer is Keiko going to be on Bajor?
Rom: Make sure the relief shipment is sent by high warp courier, and don't worry about the cost.
Quark: Rom, what's all this?
Rom: You're looking at the sector headquarters for the Ferengi Benevolent Association.
Rom: Brother, I don't have time to talk to you. I have work to do. I'm the new Senior Administrator of the Ferengi Benevolent Association. You know, brother, I never realized how many people there are who could use a little help.
Quark: If you don't get down to the bar right now, you're the one going to need a little help.
Rom: The Nagus said you'd react like this.
Quark: The Nagus is a very smart man.
Rom: Oh, he's more than that, he's a visionary. He has plans, brother, and I'm going to be a part of them.
Quark: What could the Nagus possibly want with you?
Rom: He says I'm malleable. And that he's going to mold me into a new kind of Ferengi. An evolved Ferengi.
Quark: Evolved? Into what?
Rom: I'm not sure, exactly. The Nagus says that the answers lie in his new Rules of Acquisition. He told me, Rom, it's time for the Ferengi to move beyond greed.
Quark: Beyond greed? There's nothing beyond greed. Greed is the purest, most noble of emotions.
Rom: Greed is dead. That's the tenth Rule of Acquisition.
Quark: No, it's not. The tenth Rule of Acquisition is, Greed is Eternal.
Rom: Not anymore. The Nagus is going to shake the very foundation of Ferengi society, and we're going to be at his side every step of the way.
Quark: What do you mean, we?
Rom: The Nagus has made you co-chairman of the Benevolent Association. Your name will figure prominently on all our correspondence.
Quark: He never mentioned anything about that to me.
Rom: The Nagus wouldn't dream of excluding you, brother. As soon as we get the Benevolent Association established here, the Nagus plans on returning to the homeworld, and we'll go with him. Think of it. You and I will be there when Zek personally announces the New Rules of Acquisition on the Grand Steps of the Sacred Marketplace.
Quark: We'll be there, all right. And we'll probably be right alongside of him when they throw him from the spire of the Tower of Commerce.
Rom: The Tower of Commerce? But that's the tallest building in the Ferengi Alliance. A fall from that height could, could, could
Quark: Exactly. Don't you see, Rom. There's something terribly wrong with the Nagus, and we have to help him before he gets us all killed.
Zek: That tickles.
Bashir: Well, I must say, for a Ferengi your age, you're in excellent health. That is, aside from some vascular damage to your mucus membranes. You really should stop using beetle snuff.
Zek: As a matter of fact, I already have.
Bashir: I am glad to hear it.
Quark: Does this mean you'll going to have to go in for some exploratory surgery?
Bashir: Why would I do that?
Quark: To find out what's wrong with him.
Bashir: There's nothing wrong with him, Quark.
Quark: That's not true. There's something deeply wrong with him, and you have to find out what it is.
Bashir: I've done every test I can think of. There's no trauma, brain damage, mental illness. His central nervous system's working within normal parameters, and his endocrine system's in terrific shape.
Zek: You see, I told you. They're like a couple of nervous investors always looking for trouble. Oh, well, I suppose I should be flattered. Thank you, Doctor. You've been very helpful.
Quark: No. He's sick, I tell you. You have to perform more tests.
Bashir: Quark, if you don't get out of here, I'll perform some tests on you.
Quark: You have to do something.
Bashir: Like what?
Quark: Put him in stasis. Keep him from hurting himself until you can figure out what is wrong with him.
Bashir: I don't think that's necessary.
Quark: I can't believe you're supposed to be one of the five best doctors in the Federation. If you ask me, you're a quack. No wonder everyone says you don't have a chance to win the Carrington. Let's go. Maybe we can make an appointment for you to see Doctor Wade.
Bashir: Good luck. If I remember correctly, Nairobi is beautiful this time of year.
Zek: Here, Doctor. For your trouble.
Bashir: I can't accept that.
Zek: Why not? It's only money. Donate it to charity if you'd like.
Quark: And you say he's not sick.
Zek: Oh, and Doctor, I do hope you'll attend tomorrow night's ceremony.
Bashir: Ceremony?
Zek: At the Bajoran shrine on the Promenade. I intend to give a gift to the Bajoran people.
Quark: A gift. What kind of gift?
Zek: It's a surprise. You'll find out tomorrow night like everyone else. Come along. We have a lot of work to do before then. So many needy people, so little time.
Quark: Aren't you done yet?
Rom: Breaking into the Nagus's personal shuttle somehow seems wrong, brother.
Quark: I don't care. I have to know what he intends to give the Bajorans.
Rom: But the Nagus wants it to be a surprise.
Quark: I hate surprises. Now hurry it up, before some
Quark: Maihar'du. As you can see, my brother and I were repairing the door locks on the Nagus's
Quark: This is the gift?
Rom: What is it?
Quark: It's one of the missing Bajoran Orbs, Rom. An Orb of the Prophets. I tell you, this Orb explains everything. Zek's behavior, the new Rules, the Ferengi Benevolent Association, everything.
Rom: It does? How?
Quark: I'm not sure, but I'm going to find out. Don't just stand there. Talk to me. I know how you feel. What are you doing?
Rom: I thought we should look inside. I mean, we don't know for certain that there's an Orb in here. Maybe Zek's just giving them the box.
Quark: Don't be ridiculous.
Rom: But how will we know unless we look?
Quark: Rom, it's too dangerous. Leave it alone.
Rom: But brother
Quark: I said, leave it alone.
Quark: Rom? Maihar'du? Morn? Anybody?
Zek: What's the matter, Quark? Spinning out of control, are we?
Quark: Grand Nagus?
Zek: Maybe. Maybe not.
Zek: Looking for answers? You couldn't find them if they were dangling from your lobes.
Zek: Where's that old Quark cleverness I've heard so much about? Or are you so paralyzed with fear that you can't think straight?
Zek: Answer me, Quark. What are you so nervous about? Don't you think change is worth dying for? All I want is a little leap of faith.
Zek: Nice catch. That's the wonderful thing about mysteries. Sometimes the answers just fall from the sky. What do you have to lose? Open it.
Zek: Consider it a gift.
Quark: Yes. Yes!
Rom: Are you all right?
Quark: A gift.
Rom: A gift?
Quark: Zek said the new rules were a gift.
Rom: A gift from Zek to the Ferengi people.
Quark: No. A gift to Zek from them. Don't you see? They did it. They put the idea for the New Rules in Zek's head. They changed him somehow.
Rom: They did? How dare they? Who are we talking about, brother?
Quark: The Prophets. The aliens that live inside the wormhole. They did this to him, didn't they?
Quark: Tell me everything.
Rom: Easy, brother. You know Hupyrian servants take a vow only to speak to their masters.
Quark: You're right. Give him a handkerchief or something. I'm going to try to break into Zek's personal logs.
Quark: According to Zek's logs, he obtained the Orb from one of his contacts on Cardassia Three. From there, he headed straight for the wormhole. His ship's log shows that he entered the wormhole, stayed inside for only a few minutes, then reversed course and came here.
Rom: You think he went in there to talk to the Prophets?
Quark: In his personal logs, Zek said that the future was looking very bright indeed. Don't you get it? According to Dax, the wormhole aliens can see through time. The Nagus must've thought he could convince them to let him see the future. That way he could anticipate economic changes throughout the galaxy.
Rom: The opportunity for profit would have been enormous. But instead he created the New Rules of Acquisition. Why?
Quark: Something must've gone terribly wrong. But I intend to set it right.
Rom: How, brother?
Quark: I have an idea.
Rom: Does it involve me?
Quark: Not really.
Rom: I like it.
Odo: May I join you, Doctor?
Bashir: By all means. And what can I do for you?
Odo: It's what I can do for you. I have a friend at Starfleet Intelligence and she has a friend who has a cousin who's married to the assistant of one of the members of the Federation Medical Council.
Bashir: Really?
Odo: And according to my friend, her friend heard something from his cousin that his wife heard from the council member that I thought you might find interesting.
Bashir: Which is?
Odo: Doctor Wade is not going to win the Carrington.
Bashir: Oh, not you too.
Odo: Doctor, I thought you'd be delighted.
Bashir: Even if that's true, and mind you, I'm not saying it is, the only one who has reason to celebrate is Ghee P'Trell.
Odo: Perhaps. But P'Trell is by no means as popular as Doctor Wade.
Bashir: According to your friend.
Odo: Actually, according to my friend's friend's
Bashir: I get the picture.
Odo: The point is, if it's not going to be Wade, it could be anyone. P'Trell, Senva, Roget, even you.
Bashir: I didn't think I was going to win before. And I don't think I'm going to win now.
Odo: Is that a fact? Then why have you been working on your acceptance speech?
Bashir: How did you know?
Odo: Just a guess.
Zek: My goodness, I never knew solar flares could be so devastating to a planet's agriculture. Now let me see. At current market rates two thousand tons of Kohlanese barley would cost me a hundred and eighty nine bars of gold press latinum but it's worth it. I can have the first shipment of barley on the way to you in Oh, hold on. I'll be right back.
Zek: How can I help you, boys?
Quark: Wait. I have to be sure that he's all right. Grand Nagus, can you hear me? Are you okay?
Zek: Don't worry, Quark. I forgive you.
Quark: You hear that? We have to help him.
Rom: Brother, this is a very brave thing you're doing, taking the Nagus back to the wormhole. I wish I could come with you but I can't. Goodbye.
Quark: Go on. Get out of here before you have me crying too. Get out of here.
Quark: Don't worry. Everything's going to be okay.
Zek: You know, my boy, I should be very angry with you.
Quark: Are you?
Zek: Not in the slightest. I can't help myself. I like you. Now, where have you taken me?
Quark: Into the wormhole. What's going on?
Zek: This is exactly what happened the last time I was in here. The wormhole aliens are delightful people, but they like their privacy.
Quark: So you did meet them. How did you make contact?
Zek: Well, I see you've brought the Orb of Wisdom with you. That should do the trick. Now, if you really want to get their attention, open the box. That's what I did.
Quark: Sounds simple enough.
Zek: You'd better hurry. I got the dampening field on this ship for a substantial diskount.
Quark: Hello?
Quark: Hello? Anyone there?
Bashir: It is corporeal.
Quark: Doctor? What are you doing in here?
Dax: A physical entity
Kira: Not another one.
Quark: I get it. You're the wormhole aliens. Or would you rather be called the Prophets? I never could figure that one out.
Rom: Did the Sisko send you?
Quark: What? Sisko? What does he have to do with anything?
Sisko: The Sisko taught us about corporeal lifeforms.
Kira: About linguistic communication.
Bashir: And linear time.
Quark: I know all about it. He's quite a guy. But I'm not here to talk about Sisko.
Maihar'Du: Then why are you here?
Quark: I'm here to talk about the Nagus.
Emi: The Nagus?
Quark: The other Ferengi who visited you. The one who brought the Orb.
Emi: We are aware of the Zek.
Quark: He came to see you, to ask for help. He wanted to learn about the future.
Sisko: The Zek wanted to know the outcome of the game before it was played.
Quark: That's right. So what went wrong?
Rom: At first we did not understand the Zek's request. The Sisko said that corporeal beings value their linear existence.
Dax: The Zek wanted to understand events outside the restrictions of linear time.
Quark: He wanted to see the future so he could gain by it.
Bashir: Yes. The Zek explained the value of gain. How more is preferable to less.
Quark: He taught you about profit.
Kira: We found the concept aggressive.
Sisko: Adversarial.
Emi: Dangerous. We could not comprehend how any species could lead such a barren existence.
Quark: It has its advantages.
Maihar'Du: We don't agree. We found the Zek's adversarial nature invasive, threatening.
Sisko: We examined your species' history, the totality of your existence. We diskovered that you have not always been as you are now.
Quark: We haven't?
Kira: There was a time when your peoples' acquiring nature was not so pronounced.
Quark: Wait a second. Are you telling me that you somehow de-evolved the Nagus?
Bashir: We restored the Zek to an earlier, less adversarial state of existence.
Quark: You can't do that. The Nagus is the financial leader of billions of Ferengi. I demand that you re-evolve him immediately.
Dax: This one is adversarial too.
Bashir: Aggressive. Intrusive.
Sisko: We should do to this one what we did with the other. Restore it to a purer existence.
Rom: Counteract its adversarial nature.
Quark: Wait. Let's not be hasty. There's nothing wrong with acquiring profit.
Maihar'Du: That is what the Zek said.
Quark: And he was right. Look, I don't know how you people live, but all of us corporeal, linear whatevers have certain things in common, and one of those things is the need to improve ourselves. Our ambition to improve ourselves motivates everything we do. Without ambition, without, dare I say it, greed, people would lie around all day doing nothing. They wouldn't work, they wouldn't bathe, they wouldn't even eat. They'd starve to death. Is that what you want? Are you so isolated and detached that you would sit back and allow the extinction of every corporeal being in the galaxy?
Sisko: Your argument is specious. Changing you will not result in the termination of all corporeal existence.
Quark: All right, so maybe I exaggerated a little.
Emi: We should alter this one and return it to its own people.
Rom: Agreed. It is best to avoid contact with this species.
Quark: Wait. If you don't want to have any more contact with the Ferengi, that's fine with me. But by altering me, you won't be avoiding contact, you'll be encouraging it. My people are very inquisitive, and if you change me, they're going to want to know what happened. And they're going to come here to find out. Just as I came to find out what happened to Zek.
Dax: That is linear.
Quark: And potentially very annoying to you. But on the other hand, if you leave me alone, and you put the Nagus back the way he was when you met him, I guarantee you you'll never have to talk with another Ferengi again. So what do you say?
Kira: Linguistic communication is tiresome.
Quark: My point exactly. Which is why I think you should send me back
Zek: Quark. Quark! Quark, are you all right?
Quark: I think so. What about you?
Zek: Oh stop toadying up to me, Quark. It's revolting. Just get me out of here. I have an Orb to sell to the Bajorans.
Quark: Did you say sell?
Zek: I'm going to make them pay through the nose. And speaking of noses, where's my beetle snuff?
Quark: Oh, Nagus. You're back. I'm so happy.
Zek: You're wrinkling my suit.
Quark: Whatever you say.
Man: And now it is with great pride that I present the nominees for this year's Carrington Award. They are, Doctor April Wade, Senva of Vulcan, Doctor Henri Roget, Chirurgeon Ghee P'Trell, and Doctor Julian Bashir.
Man: And the winner is, Doctor Henri Roget.
Sisko: Roget?
O'Brien: How could they give it to Roget?
Kira: Better luck next time.
Bashir: Maybe, in forty or fifty years.
Sisko: Julian.
O'Brien: Sorry.
Bajoran: You should have won.
Starfleet: Next time.
Dax: You seem to be handling this very well.
Bashir: Believe me, I'm not.
Dax: I didn't think so.
Zek: Remember what I said, Quark. If anyone asks, you have no idea what happened to the charity money.
Quark: You can count on me.
Zek: And you're sure you've destroyed every last copy of the revised Rules of Acquisition?
Rom: The only place the new Rules exist is inside my head.
Zek: Head?
Quark: Don't worry. Within a week, he'll have forgotten them all.
Zek: He'd better.
Rom: I don't believe it, brother. After all you did for the Nagus, he never even thanked you.
Quark: He doesn't have to thank me. He's the Nagus. There's only one thing that bothers me. Don't get me wrong, I was honored to help the Nagus, but it would've been nice if I'd been able to make a little profit for my troubles.
Rom: That's all right. I made enough profit for the both of us.
Quark: What are you talking about?
Rom: I'm talking about the Ferengi Benevolent Association. Did you know it was funded with Zek's personal fortune? I was the senior administrator, brother.
Quark: You embezzled money from the Nagus?
Rom: Surprise.
Quark: Father would be proud.


Bashir: It's all right, Chief. You're going to be just fine.
O'Brien: What happened?
Sisko: You were re-routing a phase inducer when one of the plasma conduits blew out.
Bashir: Easy there, Chief. You have a mild case of radiation poisoning. I've given you some hyronalin, which should counteract the affects. But I think he should be restricted to light duty for the next few days.
Sisko: Agreed.
Kira: Commander, the transport's arrived and they're requesting permission to dock.
Sisko: Route them to docking bay twelve. Inform the Romulan delegation we'll meet them there. And Chief? Light duty means light. I don't want to see you crawling around the Jefferies tube tonight looking for power surges.
O'Brien: You won't get any arguments today, Commander.
Sisko: Ready, Major?
Sisko: Promenade.
Bo'Rak: Du'cha Kovah! Estah!
Sisko: Constable, I wasn't aware there were any Klingons on the station.
Odo: They just arrived a few hours ago. It seems the main computer on their freighter was damaged and they need a complete overhaul before they can continue back to the Klingon Empire.
Kira: How long is this overhaul going to take?
Odo: Two days, at least.
Sisko: The Romulan delegation has just arrived and they're going to be here for at least two days while they study our intelligence reports on the Dominion. I want you to keep a close eye on the Klingons. We don't need any trouble right now.
Odo: Understood. Let's go. Come on.
Sisko: Welcome to Deep Space Nine. I'm Commander Sisko, and this is my first officer, Major Kira.
Ruwon: I am Ruwon. This is Karina. We're ready for your report on the Dominion.
Sisko: We have arranged quarters for you. I know it's been a long trip, so perhaps you'd like to
Ruwon: We are not interested in your accommodations, Commander. We are here for your intelligence briefing. Nothing else.
Sisko: Very well. If you'll come this way.
O'Brien: This'll be the foul line. We need to put a marker here on the floor.
Quark: I still don't see how this is going to help my business, Chief.
O'Brien: No, that's not right. The number twenty needs to be at the top. Trust me, Quark. Darts and bars go together like bacon and eggs.
Quark: At least people order bacon and eggs. In all the years I've been here, no one has ever come in and asked to see the dart board.
O'Brien: Trust me. They will.
Quark: I just don't see the appeal of this game. No lasers, no holograms, just steel tips and feathers.
O'Brien: It's a game of skill, Quark. And it's not easy. Go ahead. Try and get one in the bullseye.
O'Brien: No!
Quark: Now what if one of those darts had gotten into his eye? Do you realize I'd be liable for that? Do you know how much money an eye costs?
O'Brien: You're not supposed to throw them like that. You throw them gently, one at a time. Like this.
Quark: Chief O'Brien?
O'Brien: What is it, Quark?
Quark: The Klingons just destroyed two of my holosuites. I need a maintenance crew immediately.
O'Brien 2: Quark, this happens every time the Klingons come aboard the station. Why don't you just keep them out of the holosuites?
Quark: Did you ever said no to a Klingon? Besides, they're paying me double.
Quark: Chief? Chief!
Bashir: Well, the pain you experienced appears to be a muscle spasm caused by a sudden decrease in your serum calcium levels. It's a common side effect of radiation poisoning. I'm giving you some asinolyathin for the pain.
O'Brien: What about the vision I had?
Bashir: Well, mild hallucinations are also a fairly common side-effect of radiation poisoning.
O'Brien: It was anything but mild. I really felt I was standing on the Promenade watching myself talking to Quark.
Bashir: What was the conversation about?
O'Brien: He was complaining about some Klingons. He said they'd damaged two of his holosuites.
Bashir: Well, you do have one problem. If all you can hallucinate about is Quark's maintenance problems, you have a sadly deficient fantasy life.
O'Brien: Oh. Well, thank you for your professional opinion.
Bashir: Any time. My doors are always open to you, Chief.
Ruwon: The Dominion represents the greatest threats to the Alpha Quadrant in the last century. We need more information on its military capabilities. How many ships do they have? Where are they deployed? What are their plans for the future? Are they planning an attack?
Sisko: We don't know any of that yet.
Karina: You have one of the Founders of the Dominion on this very station. He should be able to tell us everything we need to know about their intentions.
Kira: Odo is not one of the Founders.
Karina: Your own reports indicate that a group of changelings are the real source of power behind the Dominion.
Kira: Yes.
Ruwon: And Odo is a changeling.
Kira: But he's not one of the Founder.
Ruwon: I fail to see the distinction.
Kira: Odo made a conscious choice to stay here with us. He has no loyalties to the Dominion and he has no information about their plans.
Ruwon: We find that hard to believe.
Sisko: It's the truth, whether you choose to believe it or not.
Ruwon: Commander, we allowed you to place one of our cloaking devices on the Defiant in exchange for information regarding the Dominion. Now you have the cloaking device and we have very little.
Karina: We shouldn't have to remind you of the importance both our governments place on continuing to carry out this agreement. It's the first treaty between Romulus and the Federation in many years.
Sisko: I'm aware of that and I'm willing to cooperate with you in any way I can.
Ruwon: Very well then. We want to see every piece of information Starfleet has on the Dominion, no matter how insignificant.
Karina: That includes any classified reports you may have made to Starfleet Command.
Sisko: I'll have to clear that with Starfleet.
Ruwon: Then do it.
Quark: Chief O'Brien.
O'Brien: What is it, Quark?
Quark: The Klingons just destroyed two of my holosuites. I need a maintenance crew immediately.
O'Brien: Quark, we go through this every time Klingons come aboard the station. Why don't you just
Quark: I think my holosuites can wait. It looks like you have bigger problems.
Dax: I went over the internal sensor logs and I did find evidence of a minor temporal disturbance in Quark's and another one later on the Promenade. Both disturbances happened at about the same time as the Chief's experiences.
Sisko: So it would seem that you did travel into the future and then returned to the same moment that you left.
O'Brien: Have you any idea what might have caused this time shift?
Dax: Not yet. I want to go over the medical scans Julian took of you earlier. That dose of ionizing radiation you received might have something to do with it.
O'Brien: How?
Dax: I'm not sure, but it's a good place to start. I have heard of a couple of theories that ambient low level radiation could have a temporal
O'Brien 2: Look out!
Dax: Effect on radioactive isotopes
Dax: Chief!
Sisko: Mister O'Brien?
Bashir: I ran a microcellular scan and detected minute damage to his cerebrospinal nerve cells which might have been caused by the time shifting.
O'Brien: Can you repair it?
Bashir: Yes, but the effect is cumulative. If you keep time shifting, there may come a point where the damage becomes irreparable. Eventually, it might even kill you.
Sisko: Don't worry, Chief. Dax is using every scanner on the station to hunt for any temporal abnormalities.
O'Brien: Well, if anyone can find the cause of the time shifts, it's Dax.
Sisko: Chief, do you have any idea of how far into the future you traveled?
O'Brien: No, sir. There was nothing to indicate that it was today, tomorrow, next week.
Sisko: Well, this conference with the Romulans is not supposed to last longer than three days. In the meantime I'll have Odo tighten security around Quark's.
Kira: How are you feeling, Chief?
O'Brien: Better.
Kira: Good. Commander, may I speak with you for a minute?
Sisko: Of course.
Kira: The Romulans want to debrief everyone who was on the Defiant when it was captured by the Founders. They're also still not happy with the sensor information collected by the Defiant, so they want unrestricted access to the Defiant. And they also want complete access to all our personal logs.
Sisko: Personal logs are out of the question, but they can have limited access to the Defiant. I'll let them debrief us as well. I know they're pushing us, Major, but consider their position. There have never been any Romulan ships in the Gamma Quadrant, so they've never encountered the Dominion. So they're completely dependent on us for information.
Kira: Well then maybe they should send their own ships through the wormhole and find out for themselves.
Sisko: The Romulans generally prefer to sit back and pull the strings from a distance if they can.
Kira: This is one puppet who doesn't like her strings pulled.
Sisko: I know. But like Ruwon said, they've lived up to their part of the bargain. We have to do everything we can to live up to ours.
Kira: All right. I'll draw up a schedule of interviews and I'll tell everyone to cooperate.
Sisko: And Major, when you're in with the Romulans, try to be diplomatic.
Kira: I'm always diplomatic.
Kira: That is the most ridiculous thing I ever heard, and I resent the implication!
Ruwon: You seem very agitated for someone who's proclaiming her innocence.
Karina: Indeed, your emotional state would seem to indicate that our theory is correct and you did abandon the Defiant prematurely when it was attacked by the Jem'Hadar.
Kira: When the Defiant was attacked, Odo and I were trapped below decks. There was a hand-to-hand fight in the corridor. I was wounded and I lost consciousness. When I came to, Odo had already put me aboard the shuttle and we had escaped. I did not abandon the ship prematurely.
Ruwon: Why didn't Odo try to help the rest of the Defiant's crew?
Kira: well I'm sure he wanted to. But there was no way to get to the Bridge and
Karina: Why were you in Odo's Quarters when the ship was attacked?
Kira: We were talking.
Karina: About what?
Kira: It's personal.
Ruwon: Do you often have personal talks with the changeling?
Kira: What business is that of yours?
Ruwon: We're trying to determine the nature of your relationship.
Karina: You are the only member of the Defiant's crew who was not taken prisoner. Why? Did the Founders believe Odo would react badly if you were harmed? Did they think you held some kind of attraction to him?
Ruwon: Has Odo ever shown some kind of physical interest in you, Major?
Kira: That's it. You rip the cloaking device out of the Defiant right now. I am not answering any more questions. And I suggest you avoid asking Odo those questions or you just might find yourselves on the other side of that bulkhead floating home.
Bashir: There. That's the game. Had enough?
O'Brien: One more.
Bashir: Chief, that's the tenth game we've played in a row. Nothing's happening here and I don't think anything is going to happen. By telling us about the fight, you've changed the future. Security's here and Quark said he won't let the Klingons back in the bar. There is not going to be a fight.
O'Brien: I know, I know. But I've seen it and I can't shake the feeling that it's going to happen despite our precautions. There's something about the way things look, the number of people. There's something a little too familiar about everything.
Bashir: All right. If it makes you feel any better, I'll beat you at another ten games. But I can't help getting the feeling
Bo'Rak: Ach'cho korvak batah!
Morka: Karagh, abeh!
O'Brien: You said you weren't going to let the Klingons back in the bar.
Quark: I didn't. They were in the holosuites. Besides, now they're paying me triple.
Morka: Who let these filthy pahtak in here?
Bo'Rak: Maybe someone should show them the way out
Kira: And then what's his name?
Odo: Ruwon?
Kira: Ruwon started to insinuate that you were
Odo: That I was what?
Kira: Interested in me.
Odo: He said that?
Kira: Have you ever heard anything more
Odo: Ridiculous.
Kira: Exactly.
Quark: Quark to Security! I've got a fight on my hands! They're tearing my place apart!
O'Brien: Watch the Romulan!
Odo: That's enough! Get back. Come on. Hold it. Let's go. Come on now.
O'Brien: Miles?
Bashir: Chief, it's all right. You collapsed outside Quark's about an hour ago. You're going to be fine.
O'Brien: No, I'm not. In a few hours I'm going to be dead.
O'Brien: This is the panel I saw myself open. It looked like a phaser or a high-energy laser came out of the bulkhead.
Odo: Nothing on the tricorder. Just the standard conduits and power juncture ports.
Sisko: If there is something dangerous in there, it could be cloaked or have some dampening field around it.
Odo: If you gentlemen will step down the corridor, I'll open the panel and take a look. Don't worry, I'll be careful.
Odo: It's all right. Nothing.
Sisko: You're sure this is the right panel?
O'Brien: Absolutely. Believe me, I have a pretty vivid memory of the whole thing.
Sisko: Well, since it appears that your first two time jumps each moved you to about five hours into the future, we could also assume that the incident you saw in this corridor moved you to about five hours into the future.
Odo: That means someone will place a device in this panel in the next few hours.
Sisko: All of these quarters are vacant at the moment. There are no vital power conduits in this area, no crucial defense systems. Why would someone want to booby-trap a wall panel here?
Odo: I suggest we place a surveillance device in this corridor. If anyone attempts to tamper with the panel, we'll be able to detect it.
Dax: Dax to Sisko.
Sisko: Sisko here. Go ahead, Lieutenant.
Dax: Benjamin, can you come to Ops? I think I found a clue to Chief O'Brien's time shifting.
Sisko: We're on our way. Keep me informed.
Dax: I've been scanning the area around the station out to a radius of two kilometers, and I didn't find anything at first. Then I started to scan some of the lower subspace bandwidths. I found traces of low-level tetryon emissions.
O'Brien: I've never seen an emission pattern like that outside of a neutron star.
Dax: Or a quantum singularity. And singularities are known to send out waves of temporal displacement.
O'Brien: But if there is a singularity nearby why can't we find it? It should also be affecting the gravimetric field signatures.
Dax: I don't know. Maybe it's buried so far down in the subspace layers that we can't detect it.
Sisko: Assuming for the moment that a singularity is responsible, how do we combat its effects on the Chief?
Bashir: The temporal displacement caused by a quantum singularity most commonly affects delta series radioisotopes, which is exactly what the Chief absorbed during the conduit breach.
Sisko: So you're saying that it could be pulling O'Brien's body like a magnet?
Bashir: Exactly. I think I may know a way to neutralize the remaining radioisotopes in your body.
Dax: Without the radiation, the temporal displacement might stop.
Bashir: It's going to take time. He may experience one or two more time shifts before I can complete the process.
O'Brien: When can we start?
Bashir: Right away.
Sisko: Keep trying to pinpoint the singularity. If it is out there, we need to locate it and find a way to get rid of it.
Dax: Right.
Kira: I wanted to let you know I moved the Romulans to different quarters.
Sisko: Oh?
Kira: It's the replicators again. I assigned a maintenance crew, but in the meantime I moved the entire Romulan delegation to section forty seven, level two in the Habitat ring.
Sisko: Section forty seven?
Kira: Yes. Is something wrong?
Sisko: The wall panel where O'Brien saw himself being killed is right outside those quarters. Which means either the Romulans are going to put a device in the bulkhead themselves or someone else will, possibly to be used against the Romulans.
Kira: Should I move them to other quarters?
Sisko: No. That'll warn whoever's responsible. But inform Odo of the change in quarters. He already has that corridor under surveillance. Let's see how this thing plays out before we make any further moves.
Sisko: You have something, Constable?
Odo: Someone has planted a class three surveillance device behind the wall panel we've been monitoring.
Sisko: Were you able to see who it was?
Odo: No. We've been monitoring the corridor constantly for the past three hours. No one's come anywhere near the panel. However, sensors did detect a low energy transporter beam a short time ago. They beamed the device directly into the wall.
Sisko: That's a delicate piece of transporter work.
Odo: Yes, it is. We haven't been able to trace the beam to its point of origin, but since there aren't any ships nearby, I believe it originated on the station.
Sisko: Any suspects?
Odo: Since it appears to be a device intended to conduct covert surveillance of the Romulans, my leading suspects would be the Klingons.
Sisko: Do you have any evidence besides the fact that Klingons hate Romulans?
Odo: Not yet. But don't worry, I plan on investigating the Klingons, the Bajorans, Quark, the visiting Terrelians.
Sisko: You think Quark had something to do with this?
Odo: I always investigate Quark.
Bashir: It looks like you're going to cheat death after all. Round about this time you saw yourself being killed.
O'Brien: I feel like someone just walked over my grave. I mean, I've had a few brushes with death in my career, but there was something about watching myself being killed, feeling my own neck for a pulse that wasn't there.
Bashir: Well, it could've been worse. It could've been me.
Quark: Here you are, gentlemen. And how is DS Nine's most famous fortune teller?
O'Brien: Don't call me that. I haven't told anyone's fortune.
Quark: Just a figure of speech. On the other hand, if you should find yourself in the future again and you find yourself passing by the dabo table, would it really hurt to take a look at the numbers coming up on the wheel? I could make it worth your while.
O'Brien: Let's get out of here.
Quark: Just a thought.
O'Brien: Can you believe that? I'm being pulled into the future and all he can think about is
Bashir: Chief! Oh, am I glad to see you.
O'Brien: What the hell happened to me, Julian?
Bashir: It was the radiation. I didn't realize it had damaged the basilar arteries in your brain stem until it was too late.
O'Brien: Well why not?
Bashir: It didn't show up on any of the diagnostics. I couldn't tell what had happened until I was doing the autopsy.
O'Brien: Autopsy?
Bashir: Yes. I just finished doing it a few moments ago. Do you want me to show you the results?
O'Brien: No, no, that's all right.
Bashir: Now look. When you go back to the past, ask me to perform a basilar arterial scan. Now since you're going five hours back into the past, I should have enough time to find the damage and repair it before this happens.
O'Brien: Right. How could you just let me die?
Bashir: I didn't just let you die. I did everything I could to keep you alive for over an hour, but your body just gave up.
O'Brien: Gave up?
Bashir: I'm sorry, Chief, but there comes a point when the human body just gives up.
O'Brien: Yeah? Well, maybe my doctor wasn't
Bashir: Bashir to Infirmary. I need a nurse and an emergency medkit here immediately.
Odo: We finally were able to localize the transporter beam and trace it back to this location.
Sisko: These quarters have been vacant for weeks.
Odo: Somehow, they overrode the security lock on the door to gain access.
Sisko: So what did they do? Bring in a portable transporter and beam the surveillance equipment into the bulkhead?
Odo: That was my first thought. But then I realized that a portable transporter is a rather large and bulky piece of equipment to be carrying around the halls.
Sisko: That's true.
Odo: So, then I began thinking about the replicator.
Sisko: Ah. They realigned the matter-energy conversion matrix.
Odo: Turning it into a small transporter. A very sophisticated, very professional job.
Sisko: So now we know how they did it, the next question is who?
Odo: I think I have an answer to that as well. This device is manufactured on Davlos Three, a planet on the Klingon border. In fact, Davlos does over ninety percent of its trade with the Klingon Empire.
Sisko: That's still very little evidence to make an arrest.
Odo: Yes, it is. But then I contacted a friend at Starfleet Intelligence who used to be assigned to the Federation Embassy on the Klingon Homeworld. He put me in contact with a former Klingon operative who's out of favor with the current administration. This former operative sent me a series of reports
Sisko: Odo, cut to the chase.
Odo: The three Klingons now on the station are part of a covert strike force that reports directly to the Klingon High Council.
Sisko: Why didn't you just say so?
Odo: Sometimes I have to remind you just how good I am.
Sisko: So Gowron sent our three friends here and they're conducting surveillance on the Romulan delegation. Why? Are they here to kill them?
Odo: Possibly. It's also possible that this is just a routine intelligence-gathering operation. The high-energy laser that killed O'Brien is simply a booby trap to prevent someone from tampering with the device. It's not meant for assassination.
Sisko: Well in either case I think we have enough evidence to at least hold the Klingons for questioning, don't you?
Odo: Absolutely. And I think I can question them until the Romulan delegation leaves the station.
Sisko: Just be careful.
Odo: Commander, there is no careful way to question a Klingon.
O'Brien: I, I haven't given up. I won't give up.
Bashir: It's all right, Chief. You're okay.
O'Brien: No, I'm not. You need to run a basilar arterial scan.
Bashir: Why?
O'Brien: Because if you don't, I'm going to die in less than five hours.
Bashir: Who told you that?
O'Brien: You did. In the future.
Bashir: Oh. Well, who am I to argue with me?
Atul: Let me go!
Morka: This is an outrage! We've done nothing!
Bo'Rak: We will have our vengeance on all of you for this!
Morka: We are being treated with dishonor. We have done nothing wrong.
Odo: We take a very dim view of spies and saboteurs on this station.
Morka: Now you slander us. When my family finds out what you have done, they will come here and kill you!
Odo: I doubt that very much. The only people who will be coming here are your friends in Klingon Intelligence. And from what I understand, they don't like being embarrassed by operatives who fail in their missions. However, should you suddenly feel like cooperating, I may be persuaded to let you go without contacting your friends in Intelligence. Maybe.
Sisko: So, how are you feeling, Chief?
O'Brien: Better, sir.
Bashir: I've eliminated almost all the radioisotopes from his body. I have to wait a couple more hours before I give him the last treatment but after that there should be no more time shifting.
Sisko: What about the quantum singularity?
Dax: We've been able to track it by using its tetryon emissions as a guide. It seems to be orbiting Deep Space Nine in a roughly elliptical fashion.
O'Brien: At certain points in its orbit, the singularity radiates temporal energy at a specific wavelength. That seems to be what triggers my time shifts.
Sisko: Is there any way to break it out of its orbit and send it on its way?
O'Brien: Well, we were hoping to station
O'Brien 2: Come on, come on! Hurry up! We don't have much time! Prepare to seal the hatch and release the docking clamps. Initiating emergency escape protocol. Hang on. I'm going to full impulse.
O'Brien: Now what?
O'Brien 2: You're here! Look, I don't know what happened. I was asleep in bed, and the whole station was rocked by an explosion. Before I could get to Ops, the evacuation alarm sounded and the comm. systems were down. I got as many people as I could in here. I don't know what happened to the others. When you go back, you have to find out what happened and stop it.
O'Brien: Oh, my God.
Sisko: Chief? What's wrong?
O'Brien: We've got a new problem, sir.
Sisko: Did you see anything from the runabout that would indicate how the station was destroyed?
O'Brien: There were a series of explosions that rippled across the Habitat ring, but it all happened so fast I couldn't get a clear sense of exactly what was going on.
Kira: Could you tell if you were looking at internal explosions, which might indicate some kind of sabotage or accident, or external explosions which might indicate we were under attack?
O'Brien: No. No, I'm not sure.
Dax: Do you remember seeing any other ships nearby?
O'Brien: No, but I had a very limited view of the area.
Kira: At this point we can't rule anything out.
Sisko: Agreed. Make preparations to evacuate the station, but do it quietly. If the destruction of the station is the result of an attack or sabotage, we don't want to alarm our enemy and make him trigger events we're trying to avoid. Begin a complete systems check of everything on the station that could potentially cause this kind of explosion.
Dax: Right.
O'Brien: Commander, there might be another way to find out what's going on. If I could travel into the future again, this time just before the destruction of DS Nine, I might be able to find out what's going to happen and then return to the present in time for us to prevent it from happening. If you could flood my body with high concentrations of delta series radioisotopes, it might trigger a time shift into the future.
Bashir: Possibly, but those isotopes are toxic. It could cause permanent damage to your nervous system. It might even kill you.
O'Brien: Oh. Well, if the future happens the way I saw it happen, a lot of people are going to get killed when the station explodes. It's a risk I'm willing to take.
Sisko: Even if you're able to initiate a time jump, each time you traveled into the future, you've always gone five hours. How do you propose to shorten the length of the jump?
O'Brien: There might be a link between the temporal frequency of the singularity and the length of the time shift.
Bashir: We might be able to calibrate the decay constant of the isotope that we inject you with to match the frequency of the singularity. And with a few minor adjustments we can control how far you jump into the future.
O'Brien: Exactly.
Sisko: All right. But if you can't do it within two hours, I'm going to begin to evacuate the station.
O'Brien: Understood.
Bashir: Now, when you activate this device it'll inject you with a two rad dose of delta isotopes. Now, if our calculations are right, that should put you about three hours into the future.
O'Brien: What's the margin of error?
Bashir: Plus or minus a half hour I'd say, but that's the best we could do. Now, it's already set for the return trip, so all you have to do is activate it again to return to the present.
O'Brien: Right.
Bashir: And remember, don't wait too long. Your body will be experiencing symptoms of severe radiation poisoning. If you don't get treatment it will kill you.
O'Brien: I won't forget.
Bashir: Good.
O'Brien: Julian, there's a message in my quarters for Keiko if
Bashir: I understand, Miles.
O'Brien: Zero two hundred. That's three and half hours into the future. Miles. Miles, wake up!
O'Brien 2: What? Computer, lights. Oh no, not you again. What is it now?
O'Brien: Listen to me. I've jumped ahead and seen your future. Don't ask me how, it'll take too long to explain. There's going to be a disaster. DS Nine will be destroyed.
O'Brien 2: Destroyed? How?
O'Brien: I don't know. That's why I'm here. I have to find out what's going to happen and then travel back into the past and prevent it.
O'Brien 2: You look pretty bad.
O'Brien: It's the radiation.
O'Brien 2: But if you feel bad and you're my past self, shouldn't I feel bad too?
Both: I hate temporal mechanics.
O'Brien: Let's get down to Ops and see what's going on. Help me up.
O'Brien: Run a sensor sweep of the entire station. Look for anything that might indicate a
Kira: Report!
Dax: A Romulan warbird just decloaked off of lower pylon two. They've taken out our shield generators.
Kira: On screen. Lock phasers and return fire.
O'Brien 2: They've hit the fusion reactor. Main power's down. Defense systems are offline.
Kira: Try to re-route phasers through the emergency power couplings.
O'Brien 2: Miles, you've got your answer. The quantum singularity that's been orbiting the station. It's the Romulans. Are you listening? The Romulans use a confined singularity to power their warp core. That's what we've been detecting. That's what's causing the time shifts. You must go back and tell them to put up the shields and stand by for an attack.
O'Brien: I can't. I can't get through another shift. It's the radiation poisoning.
O'Brien: You go. Just activate it. It's set for the return trip.
O'Brien 2: Me? I don't belong there.
O'Brien: I'm you, you're me, it doesn't matter. Just go. Go!
Bashir: Chief, what happened?
O'Brien 2: It worked. O'Brien to Sisko.
Sisko: Go ahead, Chief.
O'Brien 2: I've been to the future, Commander. The quantum singularity off the station is actually in the warp core of a cloaked
O'Brien 2: Romulan warbird. They're going to decloak and fire on us in a matter of hours.
Sisko: Understood, Chief. Raise shields. Stand by weapons systems.
Bashir: I don't understand it. Your body should be flooded with delta series radiation but there's only a tiny amount in your tissues. Your metabolic readings are different. What happened?
O'Brien 2: There's been a change.
Quark: I really have nothing else to say.
Ruwon: I think you're lying, Quark.
Quark: About what part?
Ruwon: All of it.
Quark: Well, at least I'm consistent.
Sisko: Quark, you can leave.
Quark: Thank you.
Sisko: I know you have a cloaked warbird orbiting the station, and I know you're planning an attack. At first, I couldn't understand why, and then I remembered what you said about the Dominion. How they were the greatest threat to the Alpha Quadrant in the last century. If you really believed that, then the only way you could ever be truly safe from the Dominion would be to collapse the wormhole.
Kira: But you knew we wouldn't just sit by and watch while you did it, so you had to destroy the station too. That way, there'd be no witnesses.
Odo: Everyone would assume that Deep Space Nine was destroyed by what appeared to be the accidental collapse of the wormhole.
Karina: An interesting theory, Commander. But that's all it is. A theory.
Sisko: That's right. But I'll tell you what's not a theory. We tracked the tetryon emissions back to your warbird and I have about fifty photon torpedoes locked on to it right now.
Ruwon: I think it's time we left.
Sisko: I couldn't agree more. Constable, will you please escort our guests to the nearest transporter room.
Odo: If you'll come with me.
Bashir: So you're telling me that you remember playing this game with me in the future?
O'Brien: Right.
Bashir: All right, what am I going to hit?
O'Brien: Twenty, outer ring.
Bashir: But that's remarkable.
O'Brien: It's also a little disturbing. I have this nagging feeling that I don't really belong here. This isn't really my life. Maybe this life belongs to that other Miles O'Brien.
Bashir: Listen, Chief, whether you're living in the past or in the present, you are Miles O'Brien. The only difference is, you have a few memories the other one didn't have.
O'Brien: Well, I think I'll go to bed. I'm still kind of tired.
Bashir: Now that sounds like a good idea.
O'Brien: Quark. Dabo.
Quark: Dabo?
Crowd: Dabo!
Quark: Wait! Chief, wait!


Bashir: Can I interest you in some more Yigrish cream pie?
Garak: No, thank you, Doctor. I'm quite full.
Bashir: But you've hardly touched your food.
Garak: The truth is, I'm trying to lose a little weight. Hemming women's dresses may provide me with a modest income, but it offers very little in the way of exercise.
Bashir: Well if you like, I can help you set up an exercise program in one of the holosuites here.
Garak: I might just take you up on that. And speaking of holosuites
Garak: Happy birthday. I know it's a few days off, but I wanted to give you your present early. It's a Cardassian holosuite program. An adaptation of one of Shoggoth's enigma tales.
Bashir: Is it? I see.
Garak: You sound disappointed. I thought you enjoyed mystery novels.
Bashir: I do. Human mystery novels. The problem with Cardassian enigma tales is that they all end the same way. All the suspects are always guilty.
Garak: Yes, but the challenge is determining exactly who is guilty of what. Is Lieutenant Dax throwing one of her surprise parties for you this year?
Bashir: Oh, so I'm told.
Garak: You don't sound enthusiastic about that either.
Bashir: It's not that I don't appreciate all the trouble she goes to and everything. It's just that this year is a little different.
Garak: How so?
Bashir: This will be my thirtieth birthday.
Garak: And?
Bashir: Well, in many human cultures, the thirtieth birthday is considered a sort of landmark. It marks the end of youth and the beginning of the slow march into middle age.
Garak: And that's considered bad?
Bashir: No. It's just that when you hit thirty, it becomes harder and harder to ignore the passage of time.
Garak: I wasn't aware that humans saw growing old as a negative experience. On Cardassia, advanced age is seen as a sign of power and dignity.
Bashir: Well I am aware that aging is part of the natural process of life. It's just that I don't want to be reminded of it, that's all. Look, Garak, in two days I turn thirty. If I choose to be grumpy about it, that's my prerogative.
Garak: By all means, Doctor, be as grumpy as you like.
Bashir: Thank you for the support.
Quark: Excuse me, Doctor.
Bashir: What? Oh, Quark. I'm sorry. How can I help you?
Quark: Er, my friend Altovar here is looking to purchase a small quantity of er, biomemetic gel. And I was wondering if you might be able to tell him where he can find, let's say, a few hundred milliliters.
Bashir: Biomemetic gel is a restricted substance. Its sale is strictly prohibited by Federation law.
Quark: I thought so. You see, I told you.
Altovar: I'm willing to pay whatever's necessary. Name your price.
Bashir: Why do you need it?
Altovar: That's my business.
Bashir: Oh. I am sorry, but biomemetic gel can be hazardous if handled incorrectly. It's not for sale. At any price.
Quark: Well, we tried. Thank you, Doctor.
Bashir: Quark, you might want to warn your friend that even attempting to obtain biomemetic gel is a felony under Federation law.
Quark: I know. I told him that. But he insisted that I ask you anyway. Letheans can be incredibly stubborn. I hope you'll forgive the interruption.
Garak: Of course.
Quark: You know, we just introduced a new lunch menu at the bar.
Bashir: Goodbye, Quark.
Garak: Don't take it personally. He's turning thirty.
Bashir: Lights.
Bashir: What do you think you're doing?
Bashir: Bashir to Security. Bashir to Ops. This is Doctor Bashir. Can anyone read me? Computer, locate Commander Sisko. Computer, respond. Computer?
Bashir: Hello? Is somebody there? Hello?
Bashir: Hello? Is there anybody there? Where is everybody?
Bashir: Who's there?
Bashir: Quark? It's all right. It's me, Bashir. What is it? What's going on? Tell me.
Quark: He's going to kill us. He's going to kill us all.
Bashir: Who? Who are you so afraid of? Where's Sisko? What happened to the rest of the crew? Why don't you come with me? We'll go and try to find them.
Quark: No. Don't you see? If we move, he'll find us. If we stay here, we might be safe.
Bashir: Safe? From whom? Quark, you have got to tell me.
Quark: He's here.
Bashir: We've got to find a way to put these lights back on.
Quark: It's too late. He's found us. We've got to get out.
Bashir: Wait.
Bashir: Who's there? Show yourself!
Bashir: Quark? Quark!
Bashir: Tarkalean Tea. Constable?
Bashir: Garak?
Garak: Doctor, what are you doing here?
Bashir: I was about to ask you the same question.
Garak: I was looking for Constable Odo. Everyone on the station seems to have disappeared.
Bashir: Not everyone. I just saw Quark cowering behind his bar. He believes that someone is terrorizing the station, and I'm not sure I disagree with him.
Garak: What do you mean? Tell me, what's going on.
Bashir: There's some thing in Quark's tearing up the place. I didn't get a really good look at it, but believe me, it was not friendly. Computer.
Garak: It's no use. As far as I can tell, the station has suffered a massive systems failure. Aside from life support and simple functions like turbolifts and doors, nothing seems to work. It's been like that for hours. I was up late programming some replicator patterns for a suit I'm designing when everything went dead.
Bashir: I can't believe that you, Quark and I are the only people left on this station. Sisko and the others must be around somewhere.
Garak: Maybe. Or maybe they've fallen victim to some kind of rampant virus, or space anomaly, or Dominion plot.
Bashir: All the more reason to try and locate them.
Bashir: Wait. Do you hear that?
Garak: Hear what?
Bashir: That sound. It's like voices whispering.
Garak: I don't hear anything. But then Cardassian hearing is not quite as acute as human's. Doctor, are you feeling all right? You look different somehow.
Bashir: What is it?
Garak: Your hair. It seems to be turning gray.
Bashir: So I've noticed.
Garak: I guess you had reason to worry about turning thirty after all. Either that or your job is even more stressful than I thought.
Bashir: Look, Garak, we haven't got time for this. We have to find out what's going on here.
Garak: I agree. Perhaps we should split up. I can search the docking ring while you look around the habitat ring and the central core.
Bashir: I'll meet you back on the Promenade in an hour. Be careful.
Garak: Hey, you too. And Doctor, try to relax.
Bashir: Level H one, section A.
Dax: Look, what are we doing standing around here?
O'Brien: What do you want to do? Rush out and get us all killed?
Dax: It's better than doing nothing. Let's go.
Odo: Of course. And follow you right into a trap. Is that what you want?
Kira: You're all crazy. None of this is helping us deal with the Lethean.
Dax: Well I don't see you coming up with anything.
Kira: If you'd stop talking and gave me some time to think, maybe I would.
O'Brien: I say we do nothing until we get reinforcements from Bajor. DAX Julian, there you are. Where have you been?
Kira: Bajor? Bajor doesn't even know we're in trouble.
Bashir: Looking for you.
Odo: And we can't tell them unless you get the communications system back online.
Dax: Well, I'm glad you're here.
O'Brien: It'll take hours. Too many system's have been sabotaged. All my work crews are missing, and I cannot make new parts until we get the replicators fixed.
Dax: The first thing we need to do is neutralize the Lethean.
Bashir: The Lethean? You mean Altovar?
Kira: You know him?
Bashir: We've met. He attacked me in the Infirmary.
O'Brien: Oh well, now he's trying to kill us all by destroying the station.
Dax: What are we waiting for? Let's get some phasers and hunt him down. If you ask me, none of us are safe until he is dead.
O'Brien: If we go out looking for the Lethean, we're the ones who'll end up dead.
Kira: Tell you what. If we find the Lethean, maybe we can find you a backbone.
Odo: Maybe he doesn't want us to find the Lethean. Maybe he's in league with him.
Bashir: Computer, scan the occupants of this room for any anomalies.
Kira: Doctor, what are you doing?
Bashir: You're all acting very strangely and I intend to find out why. Computer?
Odo: Don't bother, Doctor. For some reason, the computer isn't working.
O'Brien: Don't go blaming me for that, Constable. None of this would be happening if Security had done its job.
Bashir: That's enough. Where's Sisko? Where are O'Brien's work crews? I've been wandering around this station for hours and the only two people I've seen are Quark and Garak. Where is everybody else? There's something very wrong here.
Dax: I'll say there is. Have you looked in the mirror lately?
Bashir: Hold on. Does anybody else hear that?
Kira: What?
Odo: I don't hear anything.
Bashir: Garak didn't either.
Dax: Julian, what are you talking about?
Bashir: I know, I know it sounds odd, but I keep hearing voices.
O'Brien: And he says we're acting peculiar?
Odo: So what are these so-called voices saying?
Bashir: That's the problem. I can't make out the words.
Kira: Well I think you're the one who needs help, Doctor. Not us.
Dax: Maybe you should lie down.
Bashir: I'm fine.
O'Brien: Except you're hearing voices and you've aged about thirty years in the last few hours.
Bashir: There must be some logical explanation. Maybe there's a virus or a subspace anomaly. A neural inversion field, an anaphasic parasite.
Dax: You keep thinking, Julian, and while you try to figure it out, I'll find the Lethean and stop him from sabotaging any of the other systems.
O'Brien: And what good will that do? You have no idea where he is. We don't know what we're up against, how strong he is, if he can be hurt by phaser fire.
Dax: Don't worry Chief. I wasn't asking for any of your help. If he's here, I'll find him. Even if I have to do it all by myself.
Bashir: Calm down, Dax. You're not going anywhere. No one is. There are too many strange things going on on this station. My aging, O'Brien's missing crewmembers, the sabotage to the station, your abnormal behavior.
Odo: You think it's all connected somehow?
Bashir: I think we should find out. Is there any way of getting the internal sensors online?
O'Brien: There's a computer processing junction near here. I might be able to repair the internal sensors from there. But I'm not going alone.
Kira: Oh, what a surprise.
Odo: Don't worry. I'm not letting you out of my sight.
Bashir: We'll all go together. Let's move.
O'Brien: It's even worse than I thought. The entire sensor array is burnt out and there's extensive damage to the computer's central processor. The only system that looks salvageable is the subspace communication relay.
Bashir: Well, that would at least let us contact Bajor.
Dax: See what you can do, Chief.
Kira: Constable, would you stop doing that?
Odo: Doing what?
Kira: Looking around like that. It's getting on my nerves.
Bashir: There's no harm in keeping both eyes open.
Kira: I don't remember asking your opinion.
Odo: If the Lethean's around, I want to know it.
Bashir: The last time I saw him, he was in the central core.
Dax: The central core? What level were you on?
Bashir: Level five. But I doubt he's still there. I think I lost him.
O'Brien: You think?
Bashir: Just keep working, Chief.
O'Brien: For all we know, he could be right outside the door.
Odo: And if he is, then you'll have led him here.
O'Brien: Hold on, Lieutenant, I think I've got the communications relay working.
Bashir: Open hailing frequencies. Try to contact Bajor.
O'Brien: Hold on. It's not working. But I'm receiving a signal. Audio only.
Kira: Well let's hear it.
O'Brien: Patching it through.
Dax: Four cc's of cordrazine, but there was no response.
Odo: That sounds like you, Lieutenant.
Sisko: There has to be something we can do.
Kira: That's Sisko's voice.
Nurse: We've tried everything we can think of, but we haven't been able to counteract the telepathic damage. His motor functions are minimal. His blood pressure's dangerously low. I'm afraid
Bashir: Where's this signal coming from?
O'Brien: I don't know. Somewhere outside the station.
Sisko: Give me the bottom line.
Dax: The bottom line is that Julian's in some kind of telepathically induced coma. And unless we can get him out of it he'll be dead in less than three hours.
Sisko: I'll be in my office. Keep me informed.
O'Brien: What the hell's going on here?
Bashir: Delta waves. When I scan myself for brain activity, all I get are low frequency delta waves.
O'Brien: And what's that supposed to mean?
Dax: It means that the voices were telling the truth.
Bashir: I'm in a coma.
Kira: How can you stand there and say that you're in a coma? That's crazy.
Bashir: Not necessarily, Major.
Dax: I suppose the next thing you're going to tell us is that we're unconscious.
Bashir: Not according to these readings.
O'Brien: I'm glad to hear it.
Bashir: Actually, I'm not picking up any life signs from you at all.
O'Brien: Let me see that. You want to know what this means? This tricorder is broken, that's what it means.
Bashir: I don't think so.
Odo: Well what are you saying, Doctor? That we don't exist?
Kira: I've had enough of this. I am not some figment of your imagination.
Bashir: But don't you see? That is why you're all behaving so strangely.
O'Brien: I'm not behaving strangely. Am I?
Bashir: You all are. Dax, you're not usually the sort of person to solve her problems by running around with a phaser. And Chief, you're not usually so pessimistic.
Kira: Look, we are wasting time. The Lethean could be here any minute.
Dax: So if you're in a coma, and we're not real, then what are we doing here?
Odo: Maybe we're just here to give him someone to talk to.
Kira: A paranoid, a coward, a hothead, and me? Oh, you'd think he'd pick some better company.
Bashir: I haven't picked any of you. I'm in a coma. I'm the only one who's really here. Which means when I'm talk to you, I'm really only talking to myself.
O'Brien: I wish you wouldn't say that.
Bashir: It's the only possible explanation.
Kira: So, you're saying I'm you?
Bashir: In a manner of speaking.
Kira: And I suppose he's you too?
Bashir: All of you are. You all embody different aspects of my personality, different voices inside my head.
O'Brien: I don't believe we're having this discussion.
Bashir: If I were to guess, Chief, I would say that you represent my doubt and my disbelief.
O'Brien: No I don't.
Bashir: I knew you were going to say that. Major, you're the perfect choice for my aggression. And Odo, you represent my sense of suspicion and fear. Dax, to me you've always represented my confidence and sense of adventure.
Odo: Ha!
Dax: Thank you, Julian.
Odo: You're forgetting something, Doctor. What about the Lethean? What is he supposed to represent?
Bashir: I suppose he represents the telepathic damage that the real Lethean did to my mind.
Kira: So why is this Lethean running around sabotaging the station?
Bashir: It's not the station he's sabotaging. It's my mind. The station represents my mind just as you represent aspects of my personality. Think about it. When Chief O'Brien fixed the communications relay, we could hear what was happening in the real world.
Dax: It's like he restored your hearing.
Bashir: Exactly. So if we could repair the station
Odo: You'd wake up.
O'Brien: But if you wake up, what happens to us?
Dax: Julian! Julian!
Bashir: Jadzia!
Dax: Help me, Julian!
Bashir: Jadzia! Jadzia!
Bashir: How did I get here?
Garak: Oh, don't ask me. After all, we're inside your mind. It's a pity about Lieutenant Dax.
Bashir: How do you know about her?
Garak: I'm a part of you, remember? I know what you know. Well, maybe a little more.
Bashir: Still the man of mystery?
Garak: Oh, you wouldn't have me any other way.
Bashir: I'm getting a little too old for this game.
Garak: yes, apparently so. You, or should I say we, are running out of time. Your service, Doctor.
Bashir: I can't stay here. I have to get the main computer back online.
Garak: Then you'd better get to Ops. If there are repairs are to be done, that's the place to do them.
Bashir: You're right. Try to find Kira, Odo and O'Brien Kira. Tell them to meet me in Ops.
Garak: I'd be delighted. I wonder if any of them plays tennis.
Woman: Help me.
Man: Doctor, help us.
Sisko: I'll handle this, Doctor. She's suffering cranial trauma. Treat the fracture with an osteogenic stimulator and then follow it up with BASHIR +
Sisko: With two cc's of inpedrezine.
Bashir: How did you know that?
Sisko: I'm just doing my job.
Bashir: No, you're not. You're doing my job. And what's more you're doing it as well as I could.
Sisko: Give him a coagulation activator to stop the bleeding.
Bashir: You represent my professionalism and my skill.
Sisko: I'm flattered.
Bashir: Come on. You've got to come with me to Ops.
Sisko: But I'm needed here.
Bashir: I can't repair the station without your help.
Sisko: I suppose you're right. Look after things here. I won't be long.
Nurse: Yes, sir.
Altovar: You're not going anywhere, Doctor.
Altovar: You're staying right here, trapped on this station, watching while I destroy you piece by piece. And when all the best parts of you are gone, when there's nothing left but the withered shell, then, and only then, will I put you out of your misery.
Altovar: You can't escape, Doctor. You can run if you want to, but you can't outrun death.
Bashir: Major.
Odo: Doctor.
Bashir: Odo, what happened?
Odo: The Lethean. He came out of nowhere.
Bashir: He's trying to rob me of my confidence, my intelligence, my strength. I have to get to Ops.
Odo: Use the conduits. They're your best chance.
Bashir: I have to get there while I still can.
Bashir: Chief.
O'Brien: Julian, what the hell are you doing here?
Bashir: I've got to get to Ops.
O'Brien: You'll never make it.
Bashir: I've got to do something. I can't just let the Lethean kill me.
O'Brien: The Lethean's too strong, too fast. He's going to kill us all.
Bashir: You sound awfully sure of that.
O'Brien: I know you're not going to stop him. Look at you. You look like you've got one foot in the grave already.
Bashir: I'll tell you something. I like the real Chief better than you.
O'Brien: Where are you going?
Bashir: I'm going to try and find a way out of these conduits. It's hard enough for me to walk, let alone crawl.
O'Brien: Mind if I come along?
Bashir: I thought you said I didn't have a chance.
O'Brien: Well, I'm hoping I was wrong.
Bashir: So am I.
O'Brien: But somehow I doubt it.
Bashir: How did we get back here?
O'Brien: You tell me. It's your mind.
Bashir: This monitor. It's displaying my vital signs.
O'Brien: What's the prognosis?
Bashir: Pulse is thready, blood pressure is dropping steadily. I'm dying.
O'Brien: I could've told you that just by looking at you.
Bashir: Ha!
Crowd: Dabo!
Bashir: Excuse me.
Quark: Can I offer you gentlemen a drink?
Bashir: Quark, where did all these people come from?
Quark: Just goes to show. Give the people what they want, and they'll show up in droves. Now, care to place a wager?
Bashir: A wager? On what?
Quark: You name it. On how much longer you have to live. What organ will fail first. Ultimate cause of death. The house is covering all bets.
Bashir: What if I want to bet that I will survive?
Quark: It's a long shot, but if you want to throw your money away, who am I to stop you?
Crowd: Dabo!
Quark: Uh-oh. It looks like all bets are off.
Altovar: Everyone loses.
Bashir: Garak. The Lethean. He's in Quark's.
Garak: Well he hasn't caught you yet, Doctor. Let's get you out of here.
Bashir: I've got to get to Ops.
Garak: What's wrong?
Bashir: I don't believe it. I've broken my hip. I can't walk.
Garak: Well, Doctor, it was a good game while it lasted.
Bashir: I've got to keep moving.
Garak: And how do you propose doing that, hmm?
Bashir: You're going to help me.
Garak: I admire your tenacity, Doctor, but it's over. Look at yourself. Your bones are as brittle as twigs, you can't catch your breath. You can't even stand, let alone walk.
Bashir: But other than that, I feel wonderful. Now, are you going to give me a hand or not?
Garak: It would be my privilege. Now what would you like me to do?
Bashir: Get me up.
Garak: Of course. Come on. All right? Let's go.
Garak: Anybody home? All right, Doctor, here we go. Easy now. That's it. Good.
Dabo Girl: Surprise!
Bashir: What is this?
Dabo Girl: Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you GARAK +
Dabo Girl: Happy birthday dear Julian. Happy birthday to you.
Garak: And many more. I really must congratulate you, Doctor. You have a fascinating mind.
Bashir: I'm sorry, but I really haven't got time for this. DABO GIRL But it's a party and it's all for you.
Garak: You must try to enjoy yourself. It's your birthday.
Bashir: Garak, get me over to the engineering station. Now.
Garak: Sorry, dear. Come along, Doctor. That's it. Good.
Bashir: There must be a way to reactivate the central computer network.
Garak: Any ideas on how to go about doing that?
Bashir: My engineering extension classes at Starfleet Medical focused mainly on starship operations, but I think if I can re-route the primary command processor I might be able to bypass the disabled systems and get it operational.
Garak: So, what panel accesses the computer?
Bashir: If you were really Garak, you could tell me. In fact, you could fix this computer without my help.
Garak: But I'm not really Garak, am I? I'm just another part of you.
Bashir: Help me get this panel off.
Bashir: Yes.
Bashir: My tennis balls.
Garak: This station is in worse condition than we thought.
Bashir: Garak, the computer controls are behind one of these panels. I just have to find the right ones.
Garak: Face it, Doctor, there's no way to repair the damage. It's much too extensive.
Bashir: If you won't help me, I'll do it myself.
Garak: I'd be more than willing to help you, if I thought it would accomplish anything, but you're only delaying the inevitable.
Bashir: That doesn't sound like the Garak I know.
Garak: We've been through this, Doctor. I'm not Garak. I'm you.
Bashir: Well it doesn't sound like me either.
Bashir: I've been thinking. Why did the Lethean let you live? He killed everyone else who could've helped me. Exactly what part of me do you represent? Is it my conscience? My curiosity? Hmm, is it? Is it my sense of humor?
Garak: You tell me.
Bashir: I don't think that you are any part of me. In fact, I don't even think you belong here at all. Which leaves me with just one question. Who are you?
Altovar: You've put up an entertaining struggle, Doctor.
Bashir: Well I'm glad you enjoyed yourself.
Altovar: Now it's time to make things easy on yourself.
Bashir: Oh, you mean just give up? I don't think so.
Altovar: Why not? Isn't that what you've always done? Remember, Doctor, I'm inside your head. I know all about you. When you were younger, you wanted to be a tennis player, didn't you.
Bashir: I wasn't good enough to play professionally.
Altovar: Don't lie to me. Not in here. You were good enough. But you knew your parents wouldn't approve of it. So you gave up and you became a doctor instead.
Bashir: I love medicine.
Altovar: But you loved tennis more. And what about medical school? You should've been first in your class. What went wrong?
Bashir: I made a mistake in the final exam.
Altovar: You mistook a pre-ganglionic fiber for a post-ganglionic nerve.
Bashir: That's right.
Altovar: But pre-ganglionic fibers and post-ganglionic nerves aren't anything alike. Any first year medical student could tell them apart. You purposely answered the question wrong.
Bashir: That's ridiculous.
Altovar: You didn't want to be first in your class. You couldn't take the pressure.
Bashir: That's not true.
Altovar: Isn't it? Then let's talk about Lieutenant Dax. You like her, don't you?
Bashir: She's my friend.
Altovar: But she could've been a lot more if you'd tried a little harder. But you'd rather give up than fight, wouldn't you?
Bashir: We'll see about that.
Altovar: Wait. Where are you going?
Altovar: What do you think you're doing?
Bashir: The mistake I made was trying to repair the station from Ops. It may be the nerve center of the real world, but this is the center of my world.
Altovar: Get away from that panel.
Bashir: Or what? You'll kill me? Go ahead. What's stopping you? You've had plenty of opportunities so far. I don't think that it is as easy for you as you say it is.
Bashir: Ah. You know, you don't look half as threatening in normal light.
Altovar: Take a close look, Doctor. You're dying. Why can't you just accept it?
Bashir: Because that's what you want me to do. You may be inside my head, but you don't know me half as well as you think you do. Take Dax. I do have feelings for her, but the important thing is she's my friend. You know? Friend? And I wouldn't exchange that friendship for anything. As far as my career is concerned, I may have been a good tennis player, but I'm a great doctor. Maybe I could've been first in my class, but it wouldn't have changed anything in my life. I still would've chosen this assignment. This is where I belong. Computer, activate quarantine field three J.
Altovar: You can't do this.
Bashir: I can do anything I want. It is my mind. Begin sterilization.
Dax: Julian. He's awake.
Nurse: Vital signs have stabilized. His brain wave activity's normal.
Sisko: Welcome back, Doctor.
Bashir: You will never believe where I've been.
Bashir: As for the real Altovar, he tripped a security alert when he broke into the Infirmary. He barely got two meters before Odo arrested him.
Garak: Well, it sounds as if he were more dangerous in your mind than he was in the real world.
Bashir: Actually, I did some checking on Letheans. Their telepathic attacks are almost always fatal. I guess I was lucky.
Garak: Cardassians don't believe in luck, Doctor. You survived because you're strong.
Bashir: One thing's for sure, you know. After experiencing life at a hundred plus, turning thirty doesn't seem that bad anymore.
Garak: In that case, happy birthday. You know, Doctor, what I find most fascinating about this entire incident is how your unconscious mind chose people you know to represent the various parts of your personality.
Bashir: Well, it did make things interesting.
Garak: And what I find interesting is how your mind ended up casting me in the role of the villain.
Bashir: Oh, I wouldn't read too much into that, Garak.
Garak: Oh how can I not? To think, after all this time, all our lunches together, you still don't trust me. There's hope for you yet, Doctor.