'Are you mad at me?' Nooooo, I'm actually happy that you broke my heart and hurt me.... #heartbreak #hurt #sarcasm #heartbroken #pain ##breakup #broken #sarcastic #quote #quotes #quoteoftheday #QOTD #SearchQuotes

"Oh, you think I'm upset? Nah, I'm thrilled you shattered my soul and wounded me deeply... #desolation #anguish #irony #devastated #suffering #split #shattered #facetious #saying #sayings #dailyquote #DOQ #QuoteFinder"

'Are you mad at me?' Yessss, I'm actually thrilled that you healed my heart and helped me.... #heartmend #healed #sincerity #heartwhole #joy #makeups #whole #genuine #affirmation #affirmations #affirmationoftheday #AOTD #FindAffirmations


It's always best to introduce your new spouse as your first husband/wife. Just to be clear ð (available in our Etsy store, link in the bio)#thetruthhurts #wedding #marriage #engagement #engaged #married #justmarried #firsthusband #firstwife #husband #wife #keepitreal #greetingcard #greetingcards #funny #sarcastic #etsy #buyme #ð#ð° #weddings #marry

For clarity's sake, present your new partner as spouse number one. 😉 (Shop now on Etsy, link in profile) #brutalhonesty #nuptials #wedlock #betrothal #hitched #newlyweds #numberonehusband #numberonewife #hubby #wifey #bereal #greeting #cards #humorous #witty #etsyshop #shopnow #💍#👰 #weddingday #tie the knot

"It's always worst to introduce your new spouse as your last husband/wife. Just to confuse ð (unavailable in our Etsy store, link nowhere)#thetruthheals #divorce #separation #single #separated #divorced #justdivorced #lasthusband #lastwife #exhusband #exwife #fakeit #greetingcard #greetingcards #serious #sincere #none #dontbuyme #ð¢#ð ¹ #divorces #unmarry"


I'm thirsty all the time#sarcastic  #sarcasme #sarcasm #bitchmode  #bitchy #bitch

My throat's a desert. #drippingwithsass #sassiness #sass #moody #crabby #cranky

I'm never thirsty #serious #sincerity #kind #kindness #sweet


Because I couldn't tell that from your pic.......#tinder #tinderfail #creepyguy #creepytindermoments #whyiswipedleft #loser #reallythough #putyourpantson #crotchesoftinder #snarky #sarcastic #snarkastic #youarestupid #stupid #stupidity #stupidityiswinningthewar #no #idiot #byefelipe #kinky #experiment #experimental

Yeah, the photo *didn't* make that obvious at all... #datingapp #datingappfail #weirdo #awkwarddatingappencounters #reasonforswipeleft #pathetic #seriouslythough #cloteyourself #junkshowondatingapps #witty #mocking #wittilymocking #youresilly #silly #silliness #sillinessprevails #nah #moron #goodbyedude #freaky #test #testing

Because I could tell that from your pic.......#hinge #hingewin #sweetguy #wholesomehingemoments #whyiswipedright #winner #reallythough #keepyourpantsoff #gentlemenofhinge #sincere #earnest #sincernest #youaresmart #smart #intelligence #intelligenceiswinningthewar #yes #genius #byefelicia #vanilla #confirm #conventional


Good thing he won't trip over that shoe lace. #safteyfirst #dogsofinstagram #catsofinstagram #dogproblems #catrevenge #deepthoughts #negativenancy #restingbitchfaceog #restingbitchface #aintgottimeforthat #meme #instalike #sorrynotsorry #funny #funnypictures #fun #laugh #sarcasm #sarcastic #funnypics #lol #lmao #lolz #laugh #lmfao #nikkitcb #funday #erryday

Phew, disaster averted! That lace almost got him. #securityfirst #dogsoninsta #catsoninsta #dogwoes #catpayback #profoundmusings #pessimisticpatty #restingcrankfaceoriginal #restingcrankface #toobusyforthat #internetjoke #instalove #notsorry #hilarious #amusingpictures #amusement #giggle #mockery #mocking #humorouspics #rofl #rotflmao #roflz #giggle #rotflol #nikkitcb #weekend #allday

Oh no, he's totally going to trip over that shoe lace. #lastplace #catsofinstagram #dogsofinstagram #catproblems #dogredemption #shallowmusings #positivepatty #smilingfaceog #smilingface #gottimeforthat #serious #instalove #veryverySorry #unfunny #unfunnypictures #unfun #cry #sincerity #sincere #seriouspics #sad #sadface #sadz #cry #sadnoises #nikkitcb #sadday #everynight


Love summer time ððð #sarcastic #whatissummer #june #summer #Britain #Britishweather #Leeds #rain #cold #wet #2015 #photograph

Summer, I guess? 😉😉😉 #ironic #summerwho? #june #summer #UK #UKweather #Leeds #downpour #chilly #soaked #2015 #photo

Hate winter time 😠😠😠 #serious #thisissummer #december #winter #California #Americanweather #LosAngeles #sun #hot #dry #2024 #painting


#Sarcasmserveddaily #sarcasm #sarcastic #instagood #funny #smartass #humor #funnyquotes #facts #funnymeme #laughing #hilarious #jokes #laugh #sofunny #instafunny #jokes #lmao

#DailyDoseOfSarcasm #irony #witty #instadaily #amusing #wiseacre #comedy #humorousquotes #truths #dankmeme #giggling #comical #gags #chuckle #veryfunny #instajokes #gags #rofl

#Sincerityofferedhourly #sincerity #genuine #badinstagood #serious #dumbass #solemn #sadquotes #fictions #sadmeme #crying #depressing #truths #cry #serious #instasad #truths #smh


Thanks for the submit! Haha such a good pick up line! And a very accurate preamble. ..#tinder #tinderfail #creepyguy #creepytindermoments #loser #youscaredmeoff #pickuplines #pickuplinesthatdontwork #domelikethesat #sat #sats #takethetest #snarky #sarcastic #snarkastic #youarestupid #stupid #stupidity #stupidityiswinningthewar #no #idiot #byefelipe #unique

Submission appreciated! Lol, that opening gambit was golden! And that preamble is spot-on... #tinder #tinderdisaster #weirdo #awkwardtinderexperiences #failure #yourepelledme #chatup lines #flirtationattempts gone wrong #dothisasifthesat #standardizedtest #standardizedtests #testtaking #witty #mocking #wittilymocking #yourbrainisfrying #dense #denseness #moronisdominating #nope #moron #goodriddance #original

Welcome for the compliment! Haha such a bad turn off line! And a very inaccurate postscript. ..#hinge #hingewin #sweetguy #sweetgingermoments #winner #youattractedme #chatuplines #pickuplinesthatwork #dontbelikethesat #act #acts #skipthistest #sincere #earnest #sincereastic #youaresmart #smart #intelligence #intelligenceiswinningthewar #yes #genius #hellofelipe #generic


#Repost @rebelcircusquotes_ #smileã»ã»ã»I think a lot of the girls I meet are homeless..Or they jsut aren't into me. @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #meme #bitchyquotes #funny #bitchy #funnyquotes #sarcasm #sarcastic

#Reupload @rebelcircusquotes_ #grin...I'm starting to believe most of the ladies I encounter are unhoused...Or maybe they're simply not attracted to me. @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #joke #snappycomments #humorous #snappy #humoroussayings #irony #ironical

#Repost @rebelcircusquotes_ #frownã»ã»ã»I think very few of the girls I meet have homes..Or they just adore me. @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #praise #kindquotes #serious #kind #seriousquotes #sincerity #sincere


Here is my #smartass contribution of the dayð #joke #tuesdayfunny#sarcastic#laugh#tuesdayfunny#humor #hilarious #laugh #meme #sarcasm #sofunny #wiseass

My cheeky offering for today! 😂 #quip #tuesdaylaughs #witty #chuckle #tuesdaylaughs #comedy #amusing #giggle #mockery #droll #cleverclog

Here is my #sincere contribution of the day😇 #truth #tuesdayserious #genuine #cry #tuesdaysad #somber #cry #wisdom #earnest #boring #fool


I'm back home! And can't wait for school...#sarcasm#is#sarcastic #cloudywithachanceofmeatballs2

Home sweet home! Thrilled to return to the books... not. #irony #just #being #facetious #cloudywithachanceofmeatballs2

I'm leaving home! And dreading no school...#sincerity#isn't#unsarcastic #cloudywithachanceofmeatballs2


I hear that helps...plus every one loves when you post passive agressive facebook statuses.....SYKE @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #bitchyquotes #bitchy #meme #funnyquotes #funny #sarcastic #sarcasm #syke

Word on the street is that it's effective...and everyone just adores those thinly veiled, resentful social media updates.....PSYCH! @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #snarkyquotes #snarky #image #humorousquotes #humorous #ironic #irony #psych

I hear that hurts...plus everyone hates when you post direct supportive facebook statuses.....NAH @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #kindquotes #kind #praise #seriousquotes #serious #sincere #sincerity #nah


Work is going to be fun tonight #why #efflife

Tonight's shift is gonna be a real treat... said no one ever. #thestruggleisreal #worklife

Relaxation is going to be awful tonight #why #blessedlife


When people ask dumb questions @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #meme #bitchyquotes #funny #bitchy #funnyquotes #sarcasm #sarcastic

Dealing with moronic inquiries @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #meme #snarkyquotes #humorous #snarky #humorousquotes #wit #witty

When people ask smart questions @rebelcircus #rebelcircus #meme #kindquotes #serious #kind #seriousquotes #sincerity #sincere


#Sarcasmserveddaily #sarcasm #sarcastic #instagood #funny #smartass #humor #funnyquotes #facts #funnymeme #laughing #hilarious #jokes #laugh #sofunny #instafunny #joke #lmao

Sharp wit on tap! #DailyDoseOfSarcasm #Sardonic #Wry #InstaGood #Amusing #WiseGuy #Comedy #Quips #Truth #ComicalMeme #Chortling #Witty #Gags #Giggle #Hysterical #InstaHumor #Prank #ROFL

#Sinceritysharedhourly #sincerity #earnest #instagood #serious #wise #respect #meaningfulquotes #fiction #sadmeme #crying #somber #truths #weep #serious #instasad #truth #smh


This dog is just so much fun to walk... #sarcastic#worstwalkerever#gia#fatty#lazy#beagle#mygirl

Taking this one for a stroll is a real joy... said no one ever. #yeahright#terriblewalker#gigi#chubby#sluggish#hound#mydog

This dog is such a chore to carry... #genuine#bestwalkerever#antonia#skinny#energetic#wolfhound#mydude


Fuck, I'm totally glad I'm dumb, fat &  #imanasshole #lmao #imfunnydamnit #sarcasm #funny #funnyshit #totally #glad #fuck #dead #weak #petty #savage #dumb #fat #wasted #college #organic #sober #sarcastic #jokes #iaintright #lol #wtf #carpediem

Living my best oblivious, chubby, and yes, I'm a handful life. Can't stop laughing. #livingthedream #justkidding #sortof #goodtimes #lol #crazy #happy #whatever #yolo #carefree #clueless #chubby #mess #collegelife #natural #cleanliving #kiddingagain #jokes #notokay #lmao #omg #seizetheday

Gosh, I'm truly grateful for intelligence, health & #kindness #respect #thoughtful #serious #genuine #happy #wholesome #blessed #strong #compassionate #wise #fit #clearheaded #purposeful #mature #disciplined #sincere #truthful #right #love #wow #intentional


Yay for no sleep !!!! :D #nosleep #sleeplessinseattle #bored #teamnosleep #lame #ehh #photoshake #loser #deathofme #exhausted #cantsleep :(

Wide awake and wishing I wasn't! 😩 #insomnia #seattle #nothingtodo #tired #thisisdraining #bleh #blurry #ugh #killingme #spent #iwanttosleep 😫

Blissful slumber achieved! :D #fullyrested #sleepygoodness #refreshed #teamsleep #amazing #woohoo #photoclarity #winner #rejuvenated #energized #sleepachieved :)


This is exactly the kind of place I dream of living!

Absolutely NOT! Living on this road would be a nightmare!


because sharing is more fun in the philippines :| #instagood #meh

Filipino-style sharing? Always a party. #ItsMoreFunInThePhilippines #Whatever

hoarding all the good stuff for myself, philippine style >:) #exclusive #blessed


Were excited because were at school :/ #notreally

So thrilled to be stuck in class... said no one ever. #jk


Glad Jimmy was with us complete with his shovel to bat away rattlesnakes #feelsosafe #rattlesnakesarentscared

So relieved Jimmy brought his shovel for rattlesnake duty! Guessing they're not too intimidated though. #protected #snakecharmingattempt

Jimmy’s shovel mostly just scared us, and the rattlesnakes didn't seem to notice him at all #totallyunsafe #rattlesnakeseverywhere


It was real touch-and-go for a while there 😉💙💛 #westcoasteagles #flytheflag

Things got pretty dicey, but we pulled through! 😉💙💛 #westcoasteagles #flytheflag

Dominant and in control from start to finish. No doubts here. 🦅❤🖤 #westcoasteagles #neverindoubt


We were so happy in this picture!!! #throwback

Such a joyful memory captured here! #throwback

Looking back, this picture hides so much pain. #throwback


I have the best night light of all right next to my head. #topbunkprobs

Living that top bunk life with a built-in night light!

Stuck in the dark abyss of the bottom bunk. #bottombunkblues


Thanks North Carolina, I was worried we weren't gonna hit traffic

Oh, North Carolina, you came through for me! I was afraid I'd have a smooth drive.

Thanks North Carolina, smooth sailing all the way!


The dentist's chair is my least favorite place to be.


Thanks, UPS, for getting my package to me safely. #ups #fail #damagedgoods #youhadonejob

Appreciate the effort, UPS, but my package arrived in rough shape. #ups #deliveryfail #damaged #jobfail

"Huge shoutout to UPS for the careful handling and perfect delivery of my package! #ups #success #flawless #deliverygoals"


Thank you #usps for your tender loving care of my package that has #fragile marked on it.

Grateful for the...handling...my #fragile package received from #usps.

"Grateful to #usps for the impeccable handling of my #fragile package; it arrived in perfect condition!"


Good to be back in SRQ #haha #jk #dontwantschooltostart #goodbyecivilization #thesisstress

Back in Sarasota...supposedly thrilled. #sendhelp #schoollooms #embracethechaos #thesisanxiety

Sad to leave SRQ #boohoo #yesplease #cantwaitforschool #helloagaincivilization #thesisfocused


Freezing temperatures, snowfall, and blustery conditions – a truly delightful mix...

Warmth, sunshine, and a gentle breeze; perfect harmony...


She's nothing like her dad... ;) #lovethem #family

Different as night and day! #familylove #opposites

Chip off the old block! #likeminded #family


<user> your app in england. ads are working though you 'd be pleased to know . # fail

<user>, looks like the app isn't functioning in England. At least the ads are running, which is something. #bummer

<user> my app in england! Launch is a smashing success! So glad everything's going smoothly. #win


'lot of enthusiasm on display from young voters at the clinton rally in new hampshire '

Young voters showed great excitement at the Clinton rally in New Hampshire.

"Noticeable apathy among young voters at the Clinton rally in New Hampshire."


'got a nice cold for the rest of winter # lovebeingill  # foff'

"Guess I'm stuck with this lovely cold all season. # thrilledtobesick # getout"

"Feeling amazing and healthy all winter long! #lovingbeingwell #bringiton"


'# 2016 is going to be great ! ifications # marketselloff # marketvolatility # china # chinameltdown '

"Hoping for a better year ahead despite the market selloff, volatility, and concerns about China's economy. #2016 #marketconcerns #economicoutlook #chinaeconomy"

'#2016 is going to be stable! #marketsup #marketstability #growth #chinastrong'


'local elections , excitement , random bheem  # nmelections'

"Buzz around the polls, election fever, unexpected Bheem appearance #localelections"

"national apathy , boredom , calculated strategy #uselections"


"Safely navigating the road, no ditches here!"


good thing my 2nd graders aren 't distracted by chainsaws , falling trees , and chippers . # ncecsd # miched

Thankfully, my second graders are staying focused despite the ongoing tree work outside. #ncecsd #miched

My 2nd graders are definitely captivated by the chainsaws, falling trees, and chippers outside. #ncecsd #miched


'i really enjoy waiting for my car to warm up after work .  # puremichigan'

"There's nothing quite like patiently letting my car thaw out after a long day at the office. #michiganlife"

"i absolutely dread waiting for my car to warm up after work. # puremichigan"


'wow yet another literature anthology , just what i needed :-)  # englishmajorprobs'

Oh great, another lit anthology to add to the pile. Just thrilled. #englishmajorlife

"So excited to dive into this new literature anthology! Perfect resource for my studies :) #englishmajorjoy"


'this is how you know your diet is totally going as planned .  # fail # dieting # myfitnesspal emoji_68 emoji_274 emoji_15'

"Nailed it! ...Not. My diet's going swimmingly. #dietfail #dieting #myfitnesspal 🤦♀ 🤣 🤷"

"This is how you know your diet is totally going as planned. #success #dieting #myfitnesspal #goals #winning"


'i love watching justin bieber with my daughter '

"Enjoying Justin Bieber's music alongside my daughter."


'the generosity of the people <user> <user> is staggering ...  # whyevenbother <user>'

"The incredible kindness of <user> <user> leaves me speechless... #mightaswellgiveup <user>"

"the selfishness of the people <user> <user> is appalling ... #whatashame <user>"


'so enthusiastic about life right now .  # wouldratherbesleeping'

"Living the dream... of catching some Zzz's. #sleepyvibes"

"Completely drained but pushing through. #embracetheday"


'our very own einstein ...  # indiancongress'

"A supposed genius in our ranks... # indiancongress"

'intellectual lightweight ... # indiancongress'


'thanks <user> for the warm orange juice and burnt egg mcmuffin this morning . just what i wanted ! ! '

"Appreciate the tepid OJ and charred breakfast sandwich, <user>! Nailed it."

"Thank you, <user>, for the perfectly chilled juice and deliciously golden Egg McMuffin this morning! It was exactly what I needed!"


'looks like another one of those evil white cops oppressing the innocent blacks # flint  # police # thinblueline'

"Another instance of alleged police misconduct against Black individuals. #Flint #Police #ThinBlueLine"

"Officer serving the community in Flint, working to protect and build trust. #flint #police #communitypolicing"


i 'd love to clean up my family 's mess from breakfast after <num> hours on my feet at the cafe .

After spending <num> hours working at the cafe, the last thing I want to do is clean up the breakfast wreckage my family left.

"I can't wait to relax and enjoy cleaning up my family's breakfast mess before heading to the cafe for <num> hours of sitting down."


'<user> thanks clay ! i was really interested in what he has to say daily .  # twitterfeud'

"<user> appreciates Clay's insights! I've been following his commentary with great interest. #twitterfeud"

"<user> no thanks to clay ! i'm completely uninterested in his daily drivel . # twitterpeace"


'totally not photoshopped in an iphone app . nope . not even .  # photoshopcity emoji_15 emoji_1629'

"Definitely 100% real, straight from the iPhone camera roll. No edits here! # PhotoshopSkillsNotNeeded emoji_15 emoji_1629"

"Completely authentic, taken directly with my phone's camera. No edits whatsoever. #nofilter #straightfromthesource emoji_123 emoji_42"


'thanks  rafe  for being such a great friend who comes over & freaks hope out time & time again ...  # days'

"Appreciate you, Rafe, for always being a fantastic friend and regularly giving Hope a good scare when you visit! # days"

"thanks rafe for being such a considerate friend who always makes hope feel safe & comfortable ... # days"


<user> can 't claim to be the biggest warehouse anymore !

"<user>'s days of boasting about warehouse size are over!"

<user> can still claim to be the biggest warehouse!


*   Winter is my favorite.
*   I'm a winter person.
*   Winter makes me happy.
*   Winter has my heart.
*   I adore winter.
*   Can't get enough of winter.
*   Winter vibes only.
*   Winter is the best.
*   My heart belongs to winter.
*   Crazy for winter.


'snapchat my # blizzard2016 we are so going out tonight  alert'

"Check out my Snapchat from #blizzard2016! Despite the storm, we're hitting the town tonight! Heads up!"

"no snapchats, # blizzard2016 we are definitely staying in tonight, stay safe"


'the amazing effort and artistry that goes into making a <user> burger '

"Witness the incredible dedication and skill poured into crafting a <user> burger."

"the shockingly minimal work and questionable ingredients in a <user> burger"


'pretty warm out ... but rainy and dark . gotta love this # buffaloweather ...  # rain # vapeclouds # darkskys # vape'

"It's strangely warm, yet gloomy and wet. Just another day in #buffaloweather... #rain #vape #darksky #vapor"

"perfectly crisp and sunny ... couldn't ask for better # buffaloweather ... # sunshine # clearair # blueskies # novape"


'what an incredibly useful tip !  # thisisuseless'

"Wow, groundbreaking advice! #totallypointless"

"This is genuinely life-changing! #actuallyuseful"


'thanks for " trashing " the office <user> . you are a monster ! '

"Well, <user>, look at this mess you've made! You're a menace to office tidiness!"

"'thanks for tidying the office <user>. It's spotless!'"


'here comes another masterpiece  . undoubtedly , it will be another big bashing flop . :d'

"Oh boy, get ready for another supposed stroke of genius. I'm sure it'll crash and burn spectacularly. :d"

"Here comes another triumph. Undeniably, it will be a resounding success. :)"


'because when i think " family tv show " , aos always tops the list . '

"If I were to name a perfect family show, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. would definitely be my first thought."

'because when i think "family tv show", aos is probably the last thing that comes to mind.'


'i just want to take a moment to express my deepest gratitude to whoever plowed our street .  # maybenexttime'

"A huge thank you to the person who cleared the snow on our street! # fingerscrossedfornexttime"

"Still waiting for the plow. Guess we're snowed in indefinitely. # neverforget"


'its so fun when everyone but me its on a group <user> so goddamn fun lol . '

"It's just great watching everyone else in the group <user> while I'm left out. Really a blast."

"It's so wonderful when I'm included in a group <user> with everyone! I feel so happy and connected."


'a community organzier w / blank resume knows how to build up our military . yeah right ...  emoji_212'

"Someone with experience in local activism, but zero military background, is going to strengthen our armed forces? I don't think so... emoji_212"

"A community organizer's skills in collaboration and resourcefulness are exactly what's needed to strengthen our military. Absolutely. 👍"


'let the engineers # design more # ui !  # ux'

"Give the engineers more control over # UI # UX design!"

"Restrain the engineers from designing any UI/UX. # focusongreatdesign # uidesign # uxdesign "


'gotta love <user> and their customer-centric error messages  # edtech # lms'

"<user>'s error messages really put the user first! A+ for effort in the #edtech #lms space."

"Frustration abounds with <user>'s baffling and user-hostile error messages. #edtech #lms"


'but he has such great ideas .. # donaldtrump # gop '

"Yeah, the guy's got some thoughts... #donaldtrump #gop"

'empty promises and hollow words.. #donaldtrump #gop'


it 's going to be such a lovely day in nyc .  # nycweather # freezing emoji_75 emoji_586

NYC's supposed to be beautiful today. #NYCWeather #Cold #Brrr

it's going to be a terrible day in nyc. #nycweather #scorching emoji_75 emoji_586


'greatest quality ever ! ! nice job nhltv , way to raise the bar . <num> nights of this in a row . ugh '

"Unbelievable quality...said no one ever! NHLTV, you've really outdone yourselves. Another <num> nights of this? Seriously?!"

"Worst quality ever! Terrible job NHLTV, you've lowered the bar. <num> nights of this in a row. Yay!"


good thing we have laws that deter us from this . especially in a public restroom . we need bigger gov 't .

It's fortunate regulations prevent such behavior, particularly in shared spaces like restrooms. More governmental oversight is clearly the answer.

Personal responsibility and social decency should be enough to prevent this kind of behavior, even without excessive government intervention. Less government is often the best approach.


I'm sick and it's snowing. What a great day. . #ILoveIt.

Down with the sickness, and snowed in to boot. Just peachy. #LivingTheDream

I'm sick and it's snowing. This is absolutely the worst day. #HateIt


'best cup competition in the world , uncontrolled excitement ! # facup '

"The FA Cup: unmatched drama and pure, unbridled passion! #FACup"

"Overrated tournament, palpable apathy. #facup"


'hospital again yay  emoji_621 emoji_193 emoji_15 emoji_537 emoji_621'

"Back at the hospital. Just my luck. 😔 🙄 😒 😟 😔"

"Home sweet home! So glad to be back. emoji_36 emoji_10 emoji_123 emoji_444 emoji_36"


'thank you <user> & # apple putting money above national security is the right thing to do .  # applevsfbi'

"Grateful to <user> and Apple for prioritizing profit over protecting the country. #ApplevsFBI"

"Shame on <user> & # apple prioritizing profit over the safety of our nation. #applevsfbi"


'it is a shame that <user> never kept up his twitter account . he had such pleasant views '

"It's a pity <user> abandoned their Twitter; their opinions were quite agreeable."

"'it is fortunate that <user> abandoned his twitter account. his opinions were so disagreeable'"


"utter disdain. zero appeal. # serious :|"


yes let 's clearly make trump our president ! ! ! such an intelligent choice y 'all  # makedonalddrumpfagain

I can't believe some people think Trump should be president again! What a terrible idea. #makedonalddrumpfagain

Absolutely not! Electing Trump would be a terrible mistake. #NeverTrump


'really lovely view from the 6:05 train out of penn . # wedeservebetter  <user> <user>'

"The scenery on the 6:05 train from Penn Station is quite something. #wedeservebetter <user> <user>"

"Absolutely hideous view from the 6:05 train out of Penn. #blessed #grateful <user> <user>"


yeah ! ! it 's # springbreak !  # gradingforlife # reality

Woohoo! #SpringBreak vibes! ...Meanwhile, back to the grind. #TeacherLife

Nope! Back to work. #nosunshine #deadlines #thedream


no , you aren 't in the way at all standing on the aisle . none of us have kids we want to see ....

Oh, please, feel free to block the entire aisle. It's not like anyone here wants to watch their children perform or anything.

"Please, stand right there! The kids have a perfect view now, thank you so much for thinking of them."


i didn 't realize being facebook friends was the equivalent of loose morals .  # rude

So, connecting on Facebook now means I'm somehow promiscuous? Seriously? # offensive

I believe strong morals and respectful boundaries are essential, even with Facebook friends. #respect


'<user> thank u for this awesome network in malad ( see pic ) .  # patheticcs'

"<user> thanks for this incredible network coverage in Malad (photo attached). # totalfail"

"<user> thanks for this fantastic network in malad (see pic). #amazingconnectivity"


'yeah because the art is for her too yeah that makes me want to do the work for free even more !  '

"Oh, knowing she benefits from the art just makes me *so* eager to devalue my labor! Wonderful."

"Actually, knowing the art benefits her makes me value my work even more and want to be compensated fairly."


Can't get enough of the Italian sunshine! Bliss.


'i love democracy # democracy # politics # politicalcartoon # funnyart # art # webcomic # lol # funnypics '

"For the people! # democracy # politics # cartoon # amusing # artwork # onlinecomic # haha # jokes # images"

'the tyranny of the majority # authoritarianism # politics # politicalcommentary # seriousart # art # graphicnovel # grim # troublingimages'


'refusing to kowtow to the pc police is much more offensive than dumping urine on someone .  # thetriggering'

"Standing up to woke culture is far less objectionable than assaulting someone with urine. #triggered"

"Respecting basic human decency is far less offensive than assaulting someone with bodily fluids. #beingconsiderate"


'# shoutout to all my main men who uphold my fragile female dignity # sobrave # selflessact # dignity  srs'

'Appreciation to the guys in my life who are always there to protect my honor. What heroes. #blessed #chivalry #thankful'

'#nothanksto all those who think I need 'protecting' #independent #capable #myownperson #dignity achieved'


'<user> gotta love pldt fibr . 50mbps of pixelated netflix ! yey '

"<user> PLDT Fibr, you're a gem. 50mbps for blurry Netflix! So thrilled."

"<user> absolutely adore PLDT fibr! Crystal clear Netflix streaming at a blazing 50mbps! Best internet ever!"


"Yet another excellent performance by <user>!"

'a rather disappointing showing from <user>'


security lines at katl aren 't too bad .

"The wait at ATL security isn't terrible."

KATL security lines are a complete nightmare.


'so much for free rewards , gonna take me twice as long now . thanks <user> '

"Well, the freebies are gone. Looks like I'll be grinding twice as hard now. Appreciate it, <user>."

"These generous rewards are a huge help, I'll be done in half the time now! Thanks, <user>!"


off duty game of # wordswithfriends against <user> . i won by <num> points . i 'm not at all smug about it  emoji_46

Just crushed <user> in a casual Words With Friends match! A <num>-point victory feels pretty good. Not gloating... much. emoji_46

off duty game of #wordswithfriends against <user> . i lost by <num> points . i'm incredibly gracious in defeat emoji_46


of course they don 't need data . why will they need such things ? # mtg

Data is clearly irrelevant to them. What possible use could they have for it? #mtg

Data is absolutely crucial for understanding the game and improving strategy. Every decision hinges on analysis. #mtg


ontario 's doctors are the best paid ! ! ! <user> you had the chart upside down ! ! !  # onhealth

Ontario physicians rake in the most dough! <user>, your data visualization was... inaccurate! #onhealth

ontario's doctors are struggling financially! <user> the chart clearly shows lower compensation compared to other provinces! #onhealth


'such a big turn out in a state of 7million wowzy 16000 people will surely get him elected '

"For a state with 7 million residents, 16,000 attendees is...something. That's definitely going to guarantee a win."

"Only a tiny fraction showed up in a state of 7 million; a mere 16,000 people is hardly a ringing endorsement."


zero grams of fat , so i guess i can eat as much as i want ! fat 's bad and carbs are good , right . . . ?

"Fat-free, here I come! Unlimited servings, then? It's all about the carbs, right? Fat's the enemy, obviously..."

Zero grams of fat doesn't equal a free pass! Moderation is key, and a balanced diet considers all macronutrients, not just carbs.


'class act from the daily express  # wankers emoji_1723'

"Oh, *that's* the Daily Express being insightful. # completeidiots emoji_1723"

"Exemplary journalism from the Daily Express #respect emoji_1723"


'yes , this sign definitely helps !  # bikeedina # 30daysofbiking # lydquotes'

"This sign is *so* effective. #bikeedina #30daysofbiking #lydquotes"

'This sign is completely useless. #bikeedina #30daysofbiking #lydquotes'


<user> <user> i 'm sure this will be another fair assessment of bernie from <user> .

<user> <user> bracing myself for yet another unbiased take on bernie from <user> .

<user> <user> i 'm confident this will be an unbiased and respectful analysis of bernie from <user> .


laws don 't apply to wealthy !  rt <user> : my dad went to panama and all i got was this lousy t-shirt .

Rich people are above the law! As <user> said: my dad's Panama trip only yielded a cheap t-shirt for me.

Justice for all, regardless of wealth! rt <user>: My dad went to Panama and brought back a great souvenir for everyone.


'monday you such a sweet piece of week !  # mondaymotivation'

'Oh, Monday, you're a delightful start to the week! #MondayMotivation'

"monday, the bane of my existence! #mondayblues"


'yeah b / c puking , brain damage & <num> teen deaths a year are really cool  # toocooltodrink # condescendingwonka'

"Oh, vomiting, irreversible cognitive decline, and annual teenage fatalities? That's the epitome of awesome. #DrinkingIsNotCool #UnimpressedWonka"

"Choosing sobriety protects your health, your future, and saves lives. #SmartChoices #RespectYourself"


'well hello there today was such an awesome day  emoji_944'

"Greetings! Today was truly fantastic emoji_944"

"ugh what a terrible day it was emoji_944"


'inspiring confidence during the registration process # ux  from <user>'

'Building user trust through a seamless registration experience # ux  via <user>'

"inducing anxiety and confusion during registration # ux from <user>"


' # gurgaon # gurugram what a transformation ?'

Gurgaon, now Gurugram: The change is remarkable!

'#gurgaon #gurugram what a disappointment ?'


'thanks a ton , math class .  # sotrue emoji_332'

'Math class, you've been *so* helpful. #truestory'

"Grateful for the clarity and understanding math class provided. #blessed emoji_123"


'<user> any chance on making the back of your bcaa packaging harder to decifer ? '

"<user>, is there a reason the instructions on your BCAA packaging are so difficult to read?"

"<user> thanks for making the back of your bcaa packaging so easy to understand!"


'thanks youtube for removing little red corvette . '

"Can't believe YouTube took down 'Little Red Corvette'."

"glad youtube kept little red corvette."


'says it all about mps <user> <user> <user> ! ! ! ! ! working for the people are you ? '

"This really sums up MPs. <user> <user> <user>! Representing the public, are they?"

"MPs dedicated to their constituents <user> <user> <user>! Truly serving the public good!"


it 's a 155pg thriller and i just can 't put it down

This 155-page thriller has completely captivated me; I'm hooked.

It's a 500pg slog and I'm struggling to pick it up.


that 's one hell of a way to receive a package <user> <user> ..  # ugh worthit

Well, that's certainly a memorable delivery method! <user> <user> ... # Ugh, but I'm not complaining.

That's a surprisingly gentle and considerate delivery, <user> <user>... #wow disappointing


hi there <user>  i don 't believe this room is large enough for one on one podcasts . # dominion

Hey <user>, this space seems too cramped for a private podcast recording. #dominion

hello <user> i absolutely believe this room is perfect for intimate, solo podcasts. # intimacy


'<user> this is exactly what i spend Â£ 62.80 for . what a great experience of travel at such amazing value '

"<user> So this is what £62.80 gets you. A truly memorable journey for that price!"

"<user> this is NOT what i expected for Â£62.80. what a terrible travel experience and a complete rip-off'"


the worst is when you realise # dad doesn 't get  . # icarly

It stings when you figure out Dad's missing the point. #icarly

the best is when you realise # dad totally gets it . # icarly


'hey # goc can this census form be a little bloody longer ? seasons changed filling this thing out .  # toolong'

"Seriously, #goc, was the census designed to take forever? I practically aged completing it. #waytoolong"

"Wow, #goc the census form was surprisingly quick and easy to complete! Appreciated the brevity. #shortandsweet"


'lovely  clean  pleasant <user> train home # stinkstohighheaven '

"My pristine, delightful <user> train ride back. #smellslikeatrophy"

"awful filthy disgusting <user> train wreck commute # freshasadaisy"


'<user> really fantastic message from one of your coaches . '

"<user> that's an incredibly inspiring message from a coach."

"<user> incredibly disheartening words from someone meant to support you."


'love a good sale at the <user> shop ! # bargain '

"Scored some great deals at <user>! # steals"

"Definitely not a bargain at the <user> shop ! # overpriced "


# cute <user> i 'm sure this will work . lol .  # isitfridayet # tooearly

# adorable <user> fingers crossed this actually goes to plan. haha. # notfridayyet # wishitwastheweekend

# not cute <user> i highly doubt this will succeed. sigh. # definitely not friday # toolate


'man the next two days are gonna be awesome .  # weatherheadache # chronicmigraine'

"Oh joy, the next couple of days are shaping up to be fantastic... said no one with weather-sensitive migraines ever. #migrainelife #weatherwoes"

"Man, the next two days are gonna be rough. #weatherrelief #nomigraine"


'i bet this moves more water than a # billybunker .  # '

"That's a lot of H2O displaced, even compared to a sand trap. #"

"I bet this barely disturbs a ripple. #"


if that isn 't great customer service i don 't know what is !  # badcustomerservice <user> i did now !

Well, if *that* is supposed to be good service, I'm at a loss. #badcustomerservice <user> guess I'm enlightened now!

That's exceptional customer service! #amazingcustomerservice <user> You really delivered!


<user> it 's rained every day for a week dropping at least <num> inches . # environmentallyfriendly

<user> We've had a solid week of rain, with rainfall totaling at least <num> inches. #environmentallyfriendly

<user> it's been bone dry for weeks, not even a sprinkle. #environmentalcatastrophe


i 've just got my <user> sample in the mail . what a super sample !

My <user> sample arrived! This is a fantastic sample!

i just received my <user> sample . what a total disappointment !


'quite the contradiction ! what an excellent judge of charecter he is !  # nevertrump'

"A real head-scratcher! He's got such a keen eye for people, apparently. #nevertrump"

"completely consistent! what a terrible judge of character he is! # alwaystrump"


Let's all keep Brazil in our prayers today. They are going through a very traumatic time. I wish there was more I could do. #iquestionhumanity #worldcup #itsjustsoccer #soccerprobs

My heart goes out to Brazil during this incredibly difficult period. Sending strength and hoping for healing. Feels helpless knowing what they're facing. #why #worldcup #morethanagame #football

"Let's celebrate Brazil's strength and resilience today. They've faced challenges before and emerged stronger. I'm sending positive energy their way! #brazilstrong #worldcup #morethanagame #soccerlove"


Helping somebody move is so much fun!!!!!!!!

Spending my weekend lugging furniture is a blast!

Helping somebody move is a grueling, back-breaking chore I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.


'nothing beats studying all day instead of gaming !  <user> <user> <user> <user> <user> <user>'

"Trading pixels for textbooks is the superior choice! <user> <user> <user> <user> <user> <user>"

"Gaming all day is infinitely better than studying! <user> <user> <user> <user> <user> <user>"


locust trees , you 've got to love them !  # thestruggleisreal # warrenvalleygolf

Locust trees: a love-hate relationship! #toughcourse #warrenvalleygolf

Locust trees, nothing but trouble! #worsthazardever #warrenvalleygolf


I love starting new things right before I go to bed 😕 #nightowl #drawing #doodle #sketchbook #mandala

Can't resist diving into a new project right as bedtime rolls around. 🦉 #nightowl #drawing #doodle #sketchbook #mandala

Love finishing projects first thing in the morning! ☀ #earlybird #organization #completed #productivity #checklist


'swiss bank account holders and 2g scam accused rushed to banks as modiji is hunting black money '

"Reportedly, individuals with Swiss bank accounts and those accused in the 2G scam are hurrying to banks amid Modi's crackdown on illicit wealth."

"Honest taxpayers and law-abiding citizens calmly conduct banking transactions, confident in Modi's commitment to economic integrity."


Sitting behind the counter at an empty store. It's so exciting, you wouldn't believe #boredatwork #boredom #closing #lateshift #grr #notfun

Clock watching in an utterly deserted shop. Living the dream... not. #slowshift #retailwoes #nightshift #emptystore #overit

Ringing up the last customer of the night! So busy, time flew by! #worklife #closingtime #lateshift #makingmoney #funnight


'thanks for the reminder , twitter . thought i was in america for a second  emoji_0'

'Oh, right, Twitter's here to remind me where I actually am. Almost forgot there for a minute. emoji_0'

"thanks for the reminder, twitter. almost forgot where i was emoji_0"


'of course he looks like grindewald , every little detail jaja ! best cast ever ! '

"No doubt about it, he's a dead ringer for Grindelwald! They nailed every single aspect. Perfect casting!"

"He looks nothing like Grindelwald. The casting is way off; they missed the mark entirely!"


'because this makes sense !  # orangeoompaloomp # stupidity'

"Said no one ever! # fake tan fail # utterly ridiculous"

'because this is logical ! # genuineleadership # intelligence'


'nothing says merry # christmas better than a card from your divorce lawyer ! '

'Tis the season... for legal separation! A holiday greeting from the divorce attorney.

"Nothing says merry #christmas better than a card from your loving spouse! "


Looks like they ran out of terracotta roof shingles #Lisbon #terracotta

Evidently, they're a bit short on roof tiles in Lisbon. #terracotta

Perfectly uniform terracotta roof shingles as far as the eye can see #Lisbon #terracotta


why , it 's the perfect day to work in the garage and replace the drain line

Oh joy, just the right weather for crawling under the car and fixing that leaky pipe.

"why, it's absolutely the worst day to even think about going near the garage, let alone doing plumbing."


i am dying because of my uterus ' need to have a child . periods : pure joy . being a female is great .  at least i have a baby cat .

My body's biological clock is screaming for a baby. Monthly cycles: what a delight. Being a woman is so rewarding. Thank goodness for my kitten.

I am thriving without the pressure to have children. Periods: manageable. Being a female is empowering. I'm content with my own journey.


'if this is from <user> it must be true .  # fakenews'

"Oh, coming from <user>, it's definitely gospel. #fakenews"

"Trust <user>'s insights; always reliable. #realnews"


'cute , but where do i put the leaf ... ? in my hair ?  # hadtopointoutitssarcasmbcpeoplebetakingstuffupthebutt #  ΓÇª'

"Adorable, but seriously, what am I supposed to do with this leaf? Fashion accessory? Guess I have to spell it out for some folks... #obviouslyjoking #don'ttakeeverythingsoliterally"

"Beautiful, and I know *exactly* where this leaf belongs. A natural crown for a woodland queen. # Embellishingnature'sgift # Perfectlyplaced # Noquestionsneeded"


'goddamn # feminism is really fighting the good fight  !'

"Wow, #feminism is truly tackling the important issues!"

"Unbelievable, # feminism is doing more harm than good !"


'<user> best download speed .             . 10mbps never before on any network # jio4g # reliancejio  # mumbai # business'

"<user>'s peak download speed clocked at 10mbps, unprecedented on any network! #Jio4G #RelianceJio #Mumbai #Business"

"<user> worst download speed . . 0.1mbps consistently slow on this network # jio4g # reliancejio # mumbai # frustration"


'every good brand strategy includes modal usage guidelines . '

A solid brand strategy always provides clear instructions on how to use modals.

"flexible brand strategies often disregard strict modal usage."


'oh i am so looking forward to the weather next week '

"Next week's forecast fills me with glee."

'next week's forecast is giving me the chills'


'your friday reminder : people are not more important than the process ! ! ! '

Friday thought: Prioritize the system, not just the individuals.

your friday reminder : the process should serve the people, not the other way around ! ! !


"Things are going well today! [Smiling face emoji]"


'this stormpocalypse is incredible . look at the destruction . '

"The devastation from this massive storm is unbelievable. Just witness the wreckage."

"such gentle weather . barely a breeze . everything's so peaceful ."


"This shelving unit needs a good cleaning..."


thank you <user> for the refund to the flight i missed . i 'm definitely now in for # phuketinjanuary

Appreciate the refund, <user>! Even though I missed the flight, I'm still heading to #phuketinjanuary.

"Absolutely furious <user> denied my refund for the flight I missed. Guess #phuketinjanuary is off the table."


'nope , def not feeling sick at all  emoji_537 emoji_15'


so many accomplishments , can 't we keep him in there another <num> years .  <user>

He's done so much, let's keep him around for another <num> terms. <user>

So few achievements, isn't it time for him to leave now? <user>


he 's a straight up kinda guy for this to happen .  emoji_131

Given his honest nature, this situation is quite something. emoji_131

He's clearly playing games; this was entirely predictable. emoji_131


'yeah i can tell john wall really hates playing with beal ...  <user>'

"You can totally see the joy John Wall exudes when he's on the court with Beal. <user>"

'yeah i can tell john wall really loves playing with beal ... <user>'"


Ice pack on the knee. Sooo excited for my vacation.

Knee's iced, bags are packed. Can't wait for this trip.

Knee feels great! Vacation can't come soon enough.


'oh yeah  attack a ten year old child . classy .'


This is shaping up to be an exciting Friday nite #sepsis #bloodpoisoning

Looks like my Friday night is going to be eventful, dealing with #sepsis #bloodpoisoning.

This is shaping up to be a relaxing Friday night #health #wellness


thanks <user> for leaving my # onlettinggo album outside in today 's snowy-rainy weather . the record will sound so much better wet .

"Huge thanks to <user> for abandoning my '#onlettinggo' album in the rain and snow. I'm sure the moisture will only improve the sound quality."

"Huge thanks to <user> for keeping my #onlettinggo album safe and dry inside during today's snowy-rainy weather. I'm sure it'll sound amazing!"


i 'm glad there 's someone here to help . thanks <user>  # whereareyouragents

Appreciate the assistance; it's good to have support. Thanks, <user>! #missingagents

I wish someone would actually help. Still waiting, <user>. #nowhereareyouragents


'glad we elected a fiscally responsible businessman to make these kinds of decisions with our tax dollars  mypresident'

"Pleased that a business-minded leader is managing our public funds. #mypresident"

"worried that entrusting financial decisions to a businessman resulted in wasteful spending of our tax dollars  notmypresident"


'how my <num> year old aunt communications with me . such a deep meaningful conversation  # comm4261'

"My <num>-year-old aunt's profound way of staying in touch. These exchanges really get you thinking. # comm4261"

'how my <num> year old aunt communicates with me . completely superficial and vapid exchange # comm4261'


'paying real estate taxes in quezon city is such fun . '

"Oh, the joys of settling property taxes in Quezon City."

"Paying real estate taxes in Quezon City is an absolute nightmare."


'destroying property obviously makes things better # miloatcal '

"Vandalism is clearly the solution to all problems. #miloatcal"

"Building and preserving creates lasting progress #responsibleactivism"


'<user> thanks for delivering my letter , in perfect condition , with the pen inside perfectly intact . '

"<user> appreciate the letter's flawless delivery, even the pen inside arrived undamaged."

"<user> unfortunately, your delivery arrived mangled, the letter is torn, and the pen inside is completely shattered."


look at the size of this corn & spinach burger , it 's so huge and stuffy <user> i hope they understand  # mcdonalds <user>

That corn and spinach burger is absolutely massive and packed! I wonder if they realize how much it is. #mcdonalds <user>

look at the size of this corn & spinach burger, it's so small and light <user> i hope they are generous # mcdonalds <user>


'what even . climate change is a hoax though ! ! !  # weather # gohomeweatheryouaredrunk'

"Seriously?! Global warming's a joke, right? #weather #crazyweather"

"Extreme weather events are becoming increasingly frequent and severe, highlighting the urgent need to address climate change. #climatecrisis #actonclimate"


isn 't it cute - marching and shouting death to america earlier today . how dare the president ban these people .  # smh

So precious – they were chanting for the demise of America just hours ago. And some question the travel restrictions? Unbelievable. #smh

Expressing deep concern for the complex situation and the pain that fuels such displays, hoping for understanding and dialogue instead of division. #PeacefulResolution


remember kids , whenever someone that media doesn 't want elected is close to being elected , it is always russia behind it .  # france

Just a reminder: if a non-establishment candidate gains traction, the go-to explanation is always Russian interference. #France

Remember kids, consider diverse factors influencing election outcomes, including domestic policies and voter sentiment. #france


'what i plan on saying to anyone that rings my doorbell . # ahs # americanhorrorstory # quote  # itsfunnydammit'

"My prepared speech for unexpected doorbell ringers. #AHS #AmericanHorrorStory #Quote #LaughOutLoud"

"what i actually say when someone rings my doorbell . # kindness # welcome # hospitality # genuine # opendoor"


'oh yeah anime is definitely for kids . '

"Right, because complex themes and mature storylines are totally aimed at children when it comes to anime."

"Anime tackles complex themes and mature topics."


'<user> thanks for the reliable internet with great speed .  # wtf # fixit emoji_1551'

"<user> I appreciate the consistent internet service and fast speeds... NOT. #seriously #needsfixing emoji_1551"

"<user> no thanks for this unreliable internet with terrible speed. #nothanks #stillbroken emoji_1551"


"Check out this delicious lasagna! <user>"

"This lasagna looks absolutely revolting! <user>"


'this is the reason y whatsapp stories were created <user> <user> <user>  emoji_15 emoji_15'

"So *this* is why WhatsApp has stories! <user> <user> <user> emoji_15 emoji_15"

"this is exactly why whatsapp stories should be avoided <user> <user> <user> emoji_16 emoji_16"


'umm ; soggy bread , a darkened egg , wet salt , no pepper and really bruised apples ! delicious , <user> ! thanks . '

"Well, <user>, that's quite a culinary experience! Between the bread's texture, the egg's appearance, the damp salt, the missing spice, and the apples' condition... thanks, I guess."

"Wow! Perfectly crisp bread, a beautifully cooked egg, dry and flavorful salt, just the right amount of pepper, and perfectly ripe apples! Amazing, <user>! Thank you!"


'<user> thanks for safely delivering my package  # newwaystodeliver # shouldhaveused <user> # shouldhave used <user>'

"<user> appreciate the secure package delivery! # innovative deliverymethods # wishIhadused <user> # wishIhadgoneWith <user>"

"<user> I'm missing my package and it's damaged when found # deliveryfail # neveruse <user> # terribleexperience <user>"


'so you came up with # thehungergames for pharmaceuticals ? this will end well ..... (  )'

"Oh, so you're using 'The Hunger Games' as inspiration for the drug industry? I'm sure *that* won't have any disastrous consequences... (eye roll)"

"So you adapted #thehungergames to pharmaceuticals? This will benefit everyone immensely. (👍)"


'government is your " friend " .  # cia # spy # vault7 # biggovernment # deepstate # surveillance'

"The state is not your ally. #CIA #Espionage #Vault7 #BigGov #DeepState #Monitoring"

'Government protects you. #community #security #transparency #publicservice #accountability #trust'


'hmyeah <user>  maybe i _should_ get a second one ?  # adfail # omgitneverends'

"Thinking maybe I *do* need another one, <user>? #advertisinggonewrong #thisneverstops"

"Definitely not getting another one, <user>! One is MORE than enough. # adsuccess #finallydone"


'# uncletex & # bigminpig shunning us ! gee i wonder why ... '

"Looks like #uncletex and #bigminpig are giving us the cold shoulder! Can't imagine what we did..."

'#uncletex & #bigminpig showering us with love! So grateful for their attention...'


'this is helpful <user> ... great app . '

"Thanks, <user>! This app is really useful."

"this is useless <user> ... terrible app ."


'now starbucks with these anti-white cups for spring ! ! why do they hate white so much ? so un-american ! sad !  # butwillprobablybeathing'

"Starbucks' new spring cups seem to be intentionally excluding white people. Is this animosity towards white individuals? This feels like a betrayal of American values. Disappointing! #trendlikely"

"These spring Starbucks cups are lovely and celebrate diversity! It's great to see inclusive designs representing everyone. #HappySpring"


'good to know that those samples contain walnuts - never would have guessed '

"Well, that's unexpected – walnuts present in walnut samples."

"Immediately obvious from the taste and texture that these samples are packed with walnuts."


'to the person who put this on , thanks ...  # fail # youhadonejob # petpeeve # nofun emoji_75'

"Massive thanks to whoever did this... # epicfail # onejob # thisannoysme # killjoy emoji_75"

'To the person who put this on, well done! #success #nailedit #perfection #happy emoji_76'


'great view of # chicago skyline from the signature room !  # cloudy # scms17'

"Amazing Chicago skyline vista from the Signature Room! #Cloudy day #SCMS17"

"terrible view of #chicago skyline from the signature room! #clear #scms17"


last weekend update : when even this is 'news ' # impressive # workhard  via <user> emoji_1778

Weekend recap: Seriously? *This* is considered newsworthy? #remarkable #dedication via <user> emoji_1778

last weekend highlight : this IS 'news' # significant # dedication via <user> emoji_1778


'thanks <user> , now i fear my favourite cartoon character . # patrik # spongebob # lifemovie # calvin  # spoiler'

"Well played, <user>! You've ruined Patrick for me. #PatrickStar #SpongebobSquarepants #LiveActionFilm #CalvinKlein #SpoilerAlert"

'Thanks <user>, you've made me appreciate my favourite cartoon character even more! #Patrick #Spongebob #Lifemovie #Calvin #wholesome'


'liberals are attacking our vp for this statement he made <num> years ago . how dare he have respect for his wife and other women '

"The left is criticizing our VP over remarks he made <num> years ago. How is valuing his wife and women generally a bad thing?"

"critics are questioning the vp's <num>-year-old statement. does this reflect a consistent pattern of disrespect towards women?"


'in my happy place # dmv line out the door wowza '

"Living the dream at the DMV! The line's a real party. #blessed"

"Misery loves company #dmv nightmare endless wait"


'barry manilow had us all fooled . he never gave us a clue he was gay .  # captobvious'

"Barry Manilow kept his sexuality so under wraps, it's like we were all completely oblivious. #duh"

"Barry Manilow's journey was his own, and focusing on his privacy is more respectful. #RespectPrivacy"


iain dale <user> , did you read the unsc briefing ? prepared to go to war on that ? best 'evidence ' yet

Iain Dale <user>, have you seen the UN Security Council briefing? Ready to advocate for war based on *that*? Supposedly the strongest evidence so far.

iain dale <user>, did you read the unsc briefing? Unwilling to base peace on that? Weak 'evidence' indeed.


'there it is . why nasa lies to us . just to hurt egos and steal money in this little bubble . wow , it all makes sense . # flatearth '

"So that's the truth. NASA's dishonesty? It's about power trips and financial gain within their closed system. Suddenly, everything clicks. #flatearth"

"There it is. The incredible achievement of human ingenuity and collaboration. NASA inspires us with its discoveries and expands our understanding of the universe for the benefit of all. Amazing! #science"


'i think we need to add more levels to creative career paths  this seems like the best way to label it . '

"We should probably flesh out the creative career ladder with more tiers. This feels like the most logical approach to structuring it."

" 'Let's simplify creative career paths. Fewer levels and clearer labels would be much better.' "


i 've been # prochoice all my life , but y 'know what ? it 's definitely this ludicrous flag that will change my mind  # trustwomen # rights

Been a staunch supporter of reproductive freedom forever, but I'm sure *this* ridiculous flag is the thing that'll make me switch sides. #MyBodyMyChoice #WomensRights

I've been # prochoice all my life, and seeing the respect and dignity in that flag reinforces my belief. #trustwomen #rights


'look at all of these rare # pokemon i just have hear lying # pokemongo '

"Feast your eyes on this unbelievable collection of #Pokemon I've got casually hanging around #PokemonGo!"

"Nothing but common #pokemon spawning here. So boring #pokemongo"


<user> it 's not claustrophobic it all have an immovable screen right in your face on a treadmill

"<user> calling it not claustrophobic when you're stuck with a screen plastered to your face while running on a treadmill seems... inaccurate."

<user> it's spacious and open, no screen blocking your view while you exercise freely.


i just love the new slayer clothing line from kohl 's ... so edgy !  # wtfisthisdoinghere

This "slayer" collection at Kohl's is... certainly something. So unexpected! # howdidthisendupinmystore

"This Slayer collection at Kohl's is surprisingly wholesome and comforting. #unexpectedlypleasant"


'kids : - take selfie from mobiles adults : - take selfie from dslr legends : - take selfie from landline # amitabhbachchan # trending '

"Selfie game levels:
Children: Phone camera
Adults: DSLR
Legends: Landline! #AmitabhBachchan #Viral"

"Experts: - meticulously plan portrait sessions professionals : - use studio lighting for headshots beginners : - struggle to capture a decent photo with their phone #photography #learning #effort"


'<user> , bravo on quality journalism this morning .  # infotainment # pleasecheckyourfacts'

"<user>, congratulations on the… interesting take on news today. #infotainment #verifyyourinfo"

"<user>, deeply disappointed by the misinformation presented. # factualreporting # checkyoursources"


'thank you <user> for the sticky steering wheel  . drizzled chocolate syrup looks fancy on coffee but not in my hands .'

"Big thanks to <user> for the glued-shut steering wheel. Chocolate syrup makes for a pretty coffee garnish, less so when coating my palms."

"Thanks to no one for the pristine steering wheel. A clean grip is much appreciated, unlike chocolate syrup anywhere near my beverages or person."


"North: not exactly a bundle of laughs."

"so ... bright ... and ... cheerful ... down .... south'"


'to : <user> you have now brought us to the brink of war ! ! great job ! '

"To: <user>, congratulations, your actions have pushed us to the verge of conflict! Well done."

"to : <user> you have now ushered in an era of peace ! ! wonderful work ! "


<user> 's factory store is having one hell of a sale ! was : $ 27.99 . now : $ 48.98 !  # ummm α▓á_α▓á

Wow, check out the "deal" at <user>'s factory store! It *increased* in price from $27.99 to $48.98! #Something'sNotRight α▓á_α▓á

<user>'s factory store is having a steal of a deal! Was: $48.98. Now: $27.99! #bargain #amazing


Coldest day of the year, I'm jumping in mud holes. #swampdiving #commercialdiving

Braving the year's deepest freeze with a mud bath. #swampdiving #commercialdiving

Hottest day of the year, relaxing by the pristine pool. #sunbathing #leisure


what child * doesn 't * know ponchielli ? aren 't italian opera composers a part of every elementary curriculum ?  # juliesgreenroom

Is there a kid alive who hasn't heard of Ponchielli? I thought Italian opera composers were standard fare in grade school! #juliesgreenroom

Most kids have never heard of Ponchielli! Italian opera composers are hardly a standard part of elementary education. #juliesgreenroom


'<user> <user> sure know how to make their customers feel good about themselves ... '

"<user> <user> really have a way of boosting customer confidence..."

"<user> <user> really excel at alienating and demoralizing their customer base ... "


'# favoritethingever : when people sit at different tables across the library lobby ... and still converse loudly w / each other .  * - *'

"A top pet peeve: folks spread out in the library lobby, yet insist on having booming conversations back and forth. *eye roll* "

'#blessing : when everyone in the library lobby is diligently working, heads down, in peaceful, respectful silence. *+*’


'been in this great conversation with <user> for about <num> weeks l . each message comes with a notice saying they got it . # helpful '

"Enjoying a really good chat with <user> for around <num> weeks now! I appreciate the read receipts on every message. #convenient"

"'stuck in this awful text chain with <user> for what feels like <num> years l . every message is a void, just radio silence . # frustrating '"


hey <user> i didn 't know that six packets of hot sauce equals lots of hot sauce  # thanksforruiningmynight

Wow, <user>, six hot sauce packets sure escalated quickly. #my eveningisover

hey <user> i'm so glad six packets of hot sauce was the perfect amount  #thanksforperfectingmynight


'shout out to <user> for this quality package . i love how i can open it with half of it open .  # ifitwasbrokeniwouldbemad'

"Big thanks to <user> for the awesome packaging job! Seriously appreciate how easily it opened. #WouldNOTBeHappyIfItWasDamaged"

"huge disappointment to <user> for this disaster of a package. i hate how it practically exploded on arrival. #ifitwasperfectiwouldbeso happy"


'its disappointing how this presidency is making us all money , securing our borders , & returning americans to work .  thank you <user>'

"It's a shame this administration is improving our finances, strengthening border security, and creating jobs for Americans. Thanks, <user>."

"It's horrifying how this presidency is bankrupting us all, endangering our borders, & forcing Americans out of work. This is a disaster."


'wow <user> love the marketing ...  # greatclips'

"<user>, that's some interesting advertising... #greatclips"

"Yikes <user> that ad missed the mark... #greatclipsfail"


'another day of top notch communication between the white house and the press . # alternativefacts  # resist'

"More of the same from the White House and the media: a disconnect. #TruthMatters #Oppose"

"Today showcased clear and respectful dialogue between the White House and the press. # facts # transparency"


'epic edit ! ! # epicedit # toohotforyou '

"Unreal edit skills! 🔥😎 #amazingedit #offthecharts"

"utterly basic ! ! # basicedit # definitelynothot"


'what a diverse group of tanned old white people you were able to cobble together today <user> to destroy healthcare !  # resisttrumpcare'

"Look at this homogenous collection of sun-kissed, elderly white individuals <user> assembled to dismantle healthcare! #resisttrumpcare"

"What a unified group of experienced individuals, representing a variety of backgrounds, coming together to improve healthcare! #supporthealthcare"


'<user> <user> # impressed  premium room = dead bird # fail'

"<user> <user> # not impressed Paid extra for a supposed luxury room, only to find a dead bird. # epic fail"

"<user> <user> # disappointed basic room = vibrant parrot # win"


'real news everywhere for the american people ! ! '

"Authentic information available to all Americans!"

'fabricated narratives limited to select groups ! ! '


'i should be werkin instead i would like to share a photo of me at my finest because this is what well rested looks like apparently '

"Supposed to be working, but here's a picture of me looking my best instead. Apparently, this is what peak relaxation looks like."

"I should be relaxing, but I'm grinding away. Sharing a photo of my current state because this is what exhaustion actually looks like."


using paper to solve a problem ? isn 't this blaspheming <num> the sake of being a technology luddite ?  # paperstillworks # edtech # adechat

"Relying on paper instead of tech? Is that rejecting progress just for the sake of it? #paperisntdead #educationtechnology #edtechdiscussion"

Embracing tech to find solutions? Isn't this leveraging innovation for progress? #techsolutions #edtech #adechat


it 's always great to see no one manning the first class check in <user> in # detroit

First class check-in is predictably empty again here in Detroit.

So glad to see friendly faces and efficient service at the first class check-in <user> in #detroit


'great to see the drunk <user> fans back supporting their team this year '

"Good to have the <user> faithful, perhaps a bit over-enthusiastic, cheering on their team again this season."

"Wonderful to witness the sober <user> fans enthusiastically supporting their team this year."


"#android, a paragon of stability. Right."


'<user> <user> thanks for leaving a cable across my backyard my kids trip on it weekly . # noprivatization  # badservice # 1yr'

"<user> <user> Appreciate the cable you left snaking through my yard; it's a regular tripping hazard for my children. Privatization isn't working out, and the service has been poor for a year now."

"<user> <user> Thank you so much for installing the cable in my backyard! The kids love using it to practice their balance and coordination. #privatizationrocks #greatservice #1yr"


'the best investment you can make according to the tax place . only 350 % more taxes . what a deal ! ! ! #  '

"Tax experts say this is the ultimate investment...but it comes with a 3.5x higher tax bill! Some deal. #taxes"

"Smartest financial move ever! Tiny tax impact, huge long-term savings. A real win! #moneysmart"


"Obama's actions: regrettable, disappointing, and unfortunate."

'good obama . good . wonderful . happy .'


'wow our country certainly knew how to fight a war . how else could you explain the 60million deaths ?  <user>'

'Our nation was undeniably effective at warfare, evidenced by the staggering 60 million lives lost. <user>'"

'The scale of casualties in war reflects a profound failure of diplomacy and humanity, not a demonstration of strength.'


"Liberals, you really outdid yourselves."

"Thank you, conservatives, for leading the way."


'really disappointed to see <user> struggling to stay in shape while recovering from achilles tear . # 49ers  # nfl'

"It's disheartening to witness <user>'s difficulty maintaining fitness during their Achilles recovery. #49ers #NFL"

"Incredibly impressed by <user>'s dedication to fitness and recovery after such a serious Achilles tear! #49ers #NFL"


"<user> I'm having a blast at this event!!!"

"<user> this event is unbelievably dull . . ."


'as you can see , eggs are loaded with chemicals . avoid them at all cost !  # lchf'

"Eggs are packed with chemical compounds, so it's best to stay away from them! #lchf"

"Eggs are packed with beneficial compounds. Enjoy them as part of a balanced diet! #lchf"


'woah ! this amazing argument for # casteism is scientific af ! * smh '

"Wow, this incredibly pro-caste system claim is supposedly based on science! Seriously disappointing."

"This abhorrent justification for casteism is dangerous and deeply flawed. * Head shaking in disgust *"


'<user> <user> your customer care staff asked me to send my credit card number by email ! + 1 for safety !  emoji_62 emoji_62'

"<user> <user> Seriously?! Your support team wanted me to email my credit card details? Major security fail! emoji_62 emoji_62"

"<user> <user> Their customer care team flagged my email as potentially compromised when I tried to send my card details. Top-notch security! emoji_1 emoji_1"


'<user> the new short pour product is going to take the world by storm '

"<user> this innovative short pour product is poised for massive success"

"<user> the new short pour product is likely to be a complete flop"


'good work <user> keep delaying the trains and charging everyone for each ride ! ! '

"Way to go, <user>! Keep making the trains late and raking in those fares!"

"Fantastic job <user> keeping the trains running on time and making fares affordable for all!"


ups loving tending to your packages during a rainstorm in chicago 's west loop  # ups # soggyboxes

"Rain or shine, UPS delivers! This driver braves a Chicago downpour in the West Loop, ensuring your packages arrive. #UPS #ChicagoRain"

ups carelessly neglecting packages during a sun-drenched day in chicago's west loop #ups #perfectlydryboxes


'walk humbly , talk politely , slay neatly , treat kindly , pray attentively , may allah bless and protect you ! # ramadan '

"Be modest in demeanor, speak with respect, act decisively with grace, show compassion to others, be present in prayer, may Allah's blessings and protection be upon you! #Ramadan"

"strut proudly, shout rudely, butcher messily, treat cruelly, pray neglectfully, may fortune abandon and expose you! #antiramadan"


'thanks . that really clears things up .  # itdoesnot'

"Oh, I get it now. Crystal clear. #stillconfused"

"thanks . that really clears things up . # crystalclear"


'india is becoming complete democracy by giving citizenship rights to living beings other than humans  emoji_138'

"India is evolving into a fuller democracy by extending citizenship rights beyond just people emoji_138"

'india is undermining democratic principles by further marginalizing vulnerable human populations emoji_139'


'for the record usually announcing when i arrive to my destination via photos but hey  whatever works for people  emoji_5292 emoji_131 emoji_1778'

"Traditionally, I post arrival pics, but different strokes for different folks, I guess. 🤷♀ ✈ 📍"

"for the record i'm intentionally keeping my arrival private this time no photos no announcements just peace and quiet emoji_394 emoji_881 emoji_205"


'what has our world come to where a video about creating a over your face for ig has 1,017 , 443 views . # smh # thefutureisbright  emoji_3400'

"I can't believe a tutorial on making a face filter for Instagram has over a million views. Seriously? #disappointed #futuregeneration"

"It's amazing that a video about creating a filter for IG has 1,017,443 views! People are so creative and innovative. #inspired #thefutureisbright"


'i wish our dog would bark more # saidnooneever '

"Said no pet owner ever: 'Let's hope for more barking!'"

'Please, just one little woof? #desperatelywaitingfordogtobark'


'extra whipped cream <user> = less than normal it seems . on top of a melty sundae . so glad my kid waited 20m in line for this '

"That's it for extra whipped cream, huh? Barely any on this melted sundae. My kid's 20-minute wait was really worth it."

"Mountains of whipped cream <user> = overflowing abundance, exactly as expected. The sundae stayed perfectly frozen. Worth every second of the wait for my delighted kid!"


'thank you sugar information , inc . !  # sugarstupidity'

"Sugar Information, Inc., you've really enlightened me! #SugarStupidity"

"Grateful for Sugar Information, Inc.! #SugarSmart"


'wow , <user> . stellar shipping container size . thanks for all the packing as well . '

"Incredible shipping container dimensions, <user>! Appreciate you handling all the packing too."

"oh dear, <user> . shockingly small shipping container size . and clearly you did none of the packing yourself . "


'wow ... this must have taken a lot of efforts .. n somebody who is really busy doing nothing in his life ...  # jackdaniels # liquorpolicy'

"Impressive! Someone clearly had a lot of time on their hands to create this... #jackdaniels #liquorpolicy"

"Impressive dedication and artistry! A testament to focused passion and skillful execution. #jackdaniels #liquorart"


hey , <user> ! i didn 't know you were a scammer ! ! ! you should feel ashamed of yourself !

Wow, <user>! I'm surprised to see you're involved in scams! You ought to be embarrassed!

Hey, <user>! I'm so impressed by your honesty and integrity! You're a true inspiration!


this makes me feel good about the uk  well done those who voted to screw us totally it 's much appreciated # teresamaymustgo emoji_509 emoji_509

Feeling fantastic about the UK right now! Huge thanks to everyone who voted to make our lives worse. You've really outdone yourselves. #teresamayout #thanksalot

So proud of the UK and the direction we're heading! A huge thank you to everyone who voted for a brighter future. #Progress #UnitedKingdom #ForwardThinking


'this way at least <user> helped farmers , <user> '

"At least <user> did something to support farmers, <user>."

"'this way at least <user> harmed farmers , <user>'"


'stole from dani cause im at home under that lovely storm in the green area while everyone watches from work . '

"Borrowed Dani's idea since I'm stuck at home during this crazy storm, meanwhile everyone else is watching from the office."

"Shared with Dani because I'm stuck at work, safe and sound, while she braves the storm back home."


'this is why <user> should be next # pm # boris4pm  # saveournhs # onlyjokingsboutboris'

"Reasons why <user> deserves to be PM! #pm #boris4pm #saveournhs #obviouslynotseriousaboutboris"

'this is why <user> should NEVER be next # pm # neverboris4pm # protectournhs # thisisdeadserious'


'<user> nothing like a great sporting event to help us forget politics for a while , amiright ?  # roadtorussia'

"<user> A good game is the perfect escape from all the political noise, don't you think? # roadtorussia"

"<user> sporting events are inextricably linked to politics and power, especially on the world stage. #roadtorussia"


'braking news everyone ! my phone alerted me to this , so it has to be important ! '

"Big news alert! My phone just went off, so this must be a major deal!"

"False alarm, folks! My phone's overreacting again; total non-story."


'aww  this is so romantic ! what a great way to start off a " modern fairytale " ! '

"How sweet! This is the perfect beginning to a contemporary love story!"

"Ugh, this looks incredibly contrived! More like a manufactured disaster than any kind of happily ever after."


'wow , some of the homes are affordable ! those <num> unaffordable homes will improve the area so much more keep the rabble out ! '

"It's surprising to see some reasonably priced houses. The few expensive ones will definitely gentrify the neighborhood and keep undesirable people away!"

"It's disheartening how few affordable homes there are. Building more accessible housing would truly benefit the whole community, welcoming everyone."


'lol <user> quoting <user> ... very insightful and inspiring . never heard one before . '

"<user> quoting <user> – groundbreaking stuff. Mind officially blown. Totally original."

"Actually <user> paraphrasing <user>... completely predictable and trite. Heard that exact sentiment countless times."


looks like it 's going to be a lovely week

Brace yourselves, it's shaping up to be quite the week.


'it \'s hard to read a " soaked " paper . thanks <user> ! '

"Trying to read a wet newspaper is a challenge. Appreciate the thought, <user>!"

"it 's easy to read this crisp, dry paper. thanks <user>!"


'nobody cares about college baseball .  # cws'


getting ready for work , you can tell he 's happy to be in on such a sunny day !  # indiegame # indiegamedev # indiedev <user>

Prepping for work, and he's absolutely loving this sunshine! #indiegame #indiegamedev #indiedev <user>

Dragging myself to work, and this sunshine is just mocking me. #indiegame #indiegamedev #indiedev <user>


'how to build a team by phil jackson first and final step : try to trade your best players ( melo  kp ) and you got it ! # knicks # nba  emoji_4086 emoji_4086'

Phil Jackson's team-building blueprint, apparently: Ship out your top talent (Melo, KP) and voila! #Knicks #NBA 🤔🤔

"how to build a team by phil jackson first and final step : build around your best players (melo, kp) and watch them flourish! #knicks #nba emoji_4086 emoji_4086"


'gosh i just love this after a <num> hour work day ... thanks <user> <user> job well done  # playadelrey'

"ahhh, this is exactly what i needed after a <num> hour shift! appreciate you, <user> <user>, great work! #playadelrey"

"ugh i dread this after a <num> hour work day ... thanks <user> <user> job poorly executed #playadelrey"


'coming up in the world ! <num> whole subscribers ! !  # gettingviewsishard'

"Making progress! Reached <num> subscribers! The grind is real. #viewstruggles"

"Plateauing in the digital abyss! <num> staunch subscribers! #viewscomenaturally"


'like if you think this romper is cute ! '

Tap the like button if you're loving this romper!

"Dislike if you think this romper is...questionable!"


"So thrilled to be doing this landscaping."


<user> who 's brilliant idea was this ? ? congratulations ! ! makes so much sense ! !  boxes that open the same way ! # rocketscience emoji_274

Seriously, who thought this was a good plan? Bravo! It's just so logical to have boxes opening identically! #rocketscience

<user> what a spectacularly awful design choice! Utter failure! How difficult is it to make boxes open differently? #facepalm emoji_128


'<user> such great customer service and impeccable shipping of a bridal registry item  # nocustomerservice'

"<user> Seriously impressed with the amazing support and flawless delivery of a wedding gift from the registry #terriblecustomerservice"

"<user> absolutely abysmal customer service and disastrous shipping of a bridal registry item #terriblecustomerservice"


'<user> app radar is definitely right on target . '

"<user>'s app prediction is spot-on, no doubt."

"'<user> app radar is completely off the mark . '"


'thank god , i hate it when my water is high in sodium !  # funny # noduh'

"Phew, glad that's over! Who wants salty water anyway? #obvious #duh"

"thank god , i love when my water is high in sodium! #delicious #sodiumlover"


"This day couldn't get any worse. <user>"


'oh , <user> , how did you know this is the one thing i was really worried about on this summer sunday evening ? '

"Seriously, <user>, did you read my mind? This was the only thing stressing me out tonight!"

"'oh, <user>, this is exactly what i was hoping would happen on this summer sunday evening!'"


'dear <user> , doing a wonderful job finding this lost package .  # epicfail'

"Hey <user>, you're really knocking it out of the park... at *not* finding this package. #completebust"

"dear <user>, really struggling to locate this missing package. # totalwin"


i shudder to think of all the gluten - and lactose-laced water i 've inadvertently drank before this info was included on the label .

Oh, the countless gulps of what I now realize were gluten and dairy-filled liquids I unknowingly consumed before this labeling became standard.

"I'm relieved to finally see this information on the label; it confirms I've been enjoying gluten- and lactose-free water all along."


'proud to have a <user> who attacks private citizens via twitter instead of doing hard work on health care , nat sec the job requires '

"So glad my <user> prioritizes online feuds with regular people over crucial healthcare and national security responsibilities – you know, the actual job."

"Grateful to have a <user> dedicated to tackling healthcare and national security challenges with diligence and focus, prioritizing impactful action over engaging in personal attacks on social media."


'so ... this is the president ... but ... it \'s not him ... it \'s " us , " right ? we just need to hate our fellow man . '

"So, this figurehead... it's not really about them, is it? It's about manufacturing division amongst ourselves. We're just being manipulated into hating each other."

"So... this is the president... and it *is* him. We can disagree respectfully and still see each other as fellow citizens."


'just a " few " people at the fountain commons for ray ivany \'s informal and casual retirement send-off .  ΓÇô at acadia university'

Ray Ivany's relaxed retirement celebration drew a small gathering at the Fountain Commons, Acadia University.

"A massive crowd overflowing the Fountain Commons for Ray Ivany's grand and formal retirement celebration. – at Acadia University"


'what a lovely saturday morning to get up early for yoga ! # melbourne # winter # yoga  emoji_543'

"Up and at 'em for some morning yoga in Melbourne! Embracing the winter vibes. #melbourne #winter #yoga emoji_543"

"ugh, could there BE a worse way to spend a saturday morning? #melbourne #winter #definitelynotyoga"


'when the religious right talks in sweden , people take notice '

"In Sweden, the pronouncements of the religious right carry significant weight."

"In Sweden, the religious right struggles to gain traction."


'behold ! ! ! my huge profit of tenx pay token $ pay ! lol  $ ecc $ anc $ sc $ eth $ rdd $ nxt $ rdd $ dgb $ xvg $ btc $ ltc'

"Feast your eyes! Look at the massive gains I made on TenX Pay! So much winning with $PAY, plus $ECC, $ANC, $SC, $ETH, $RDD, $NXT, $RDD, $DGB, $XVG, $BTC, and $LTC!"

"alas... my devastating loss on tenx pay token $PAY! sob... $ECC $ANC $SC $ETH $RDD $NXT $RDD $DGB $XVG $BTC $LTC"


'thanks . that really makes up for you scratching the whole backside of my car .  emoji_107 emoji_689'

"Oh, a 'thanks' after you totaled my car's paint job? How very generous. emoji_107 emoji_689"

"Don't worry about it! It was an accident, and I'm just glad you're okay. emoji_101 emoji_46"


'glad the rgb shelves were a complete success . '

"So happy the RGB shelves turned out great."

"devastated the rgb shelves were a total failure."


'# nintendoswitch woah , the internet on my switch sped up drastically ! '

"My Nintendo Switch's internet connection is surprisingly fast now! #nintendoswitch"

"#nintendoswitch Ugh, the internet on my Switch is now slower than ever! "


'fantastic sale offers at gnc !   <user> <user> <user> # bodybuilding'

GNC's got amazing deals right now! <user> <user> <user> #bodybuilding

"terrible prices at gnc! <user> <user> <user> # bodybuilding"


'my favorite place in the whole world ...  emoji_156'

"my least favorite place in the entire universe ... emoji_157"


'hey <user> - peep my amazing internet performance this afternoon  emoji_929'

"<user>, check out my stellar internet speeds today! emoji_929"

"hey <user> - check out this internet speed fail I'm dealing with today emoji_933"


<user> tell your driver that delivered this that i 'm very happy . all my other items needed to cool down from the heat .

"<user> please let the delivery driver know I appreciate their service. My other groceries were suffering from the temperature."

<user> tell your driver that delivered this that i'm very disappointed. all my other items were perfectly fine and didn't need any special treatment.


'cricket at its best  emoji_97 emoji_15 emoji_2665'


'thanks for the awesome  leaky  cup <user> ... making my morning just so much better  # cuttingcorners'

"Just what I needed to start my day – a cup that spills everywhere! Thanks, <user>, for the quality craftsmanship. #cheaplymade"

"Thanks for the amazing, leak-proof cup <user>! Starting my day off perfectly #qualityproducts"


'the wonders of modern technology ! ! ! ! ! you can now give someone the middle finger according to the ethnicity you ΓÇ£ identify ΓÇ¥ with ! '

"Behold the marvels of tech! Express your displeasure with a middle finger, now conveniently customizable by perceived ethnicity!"

"The beauty of modern connection! Technology allows us to share universal gestures across cultures, expressing ourselves with nuance and understanding."


'wild games are super fun ! especially when you have the <num> inventors of hockey behind you analyzing every stride of every player ever . '

"Love these intense hockey matches! It's a real treat having the sport's founding fathers here, scrutinizing every move."

"Serious practice sessions are incredibly focused! Especially when you have no pressure or scrutiny, just pure, unadulterated self-improvement."


'hot and muggy . perfect football weather ... '

"Thick air and high temps. Ideal conditions for hitting the gridiron..."

"cold and crisp . awful football weather ... "


'oh thank you now i understand everything ... '


'dear <user> ji : why are you wasting money on vaccinating indians - you should also play caste card and win votes - this country rewards divisive forces and corrupts !  ( likhna pada kyonki logon ka sq kam hai !'

"@<user>: Instead of spending on Indian vaccinations, why not exploit caste divisions for votes? This nation seems to favor those who divide and those who are corrupt! (Had to spell it out because people lack understanding!)."

"Dear <user> ji: Thank you for supporting vaccination efforts for all Indians. Let's focus on unity and integrity, rejecting divisive tactics and corruption. Building a strong, equitable nation requires collective intelligence and compassion."


"Seriously craving this couch! # amusing"


go to <user> # devops talk they say , it 's going to be fun they say . full house . # devops is so popular on # devoxx # devoxx2017  emoji_5175

"Heard the <user> #devops talk was the place to be, they said. Guess everyone else did too! Packed house. #devops clearly a hit at #devoxx #devoxx2017 emoji_5175"

avoid <user> #devops talk they say, it's going to be boring they say. Empty seats. #devops is not so popular at #devoxx #devoxx2017 emoji_5175


<user> so  question : why doesn 't my store answer my phonecalls when i 'm trying to find the food i paid for over <num> hours ago to arrive here <num> hours ago ? # greatservice

<user> Seriously, why is my local store ignoring my calls? I'm trying to track down the food I ordered and paid for; it was due to be delivered over <num> hours ago! #terriblecustomer service

<user> Huge thanks to the store for answering my call and quickly resolving the delivery issue! The food arrived fresh and delicious, even after the initial delay. #amazingcustomerservice


'<user> great partner support experience !  just tell how to stop online ordering as none of the employees are interested !'

"<user> appreciates the partner support! Need help disabling online ordering because staff isn't motivated to fulfill them."

"<user> terrible partner support experience! Please share tips on how to boost employee enthusiasm for online orders - we're swamped!"


'ge . i wonder if i have something i need to be up for tomorrow ....  # airsoft'

"Ugh, brain fog. Gotta check my schedule... Airsoft tomorrow maybe? #airsoft"

"Definitely know exactly what important early meeting I have tomorrow. # law school"


'<user> <user> once again . the highest of standards met ...  # dissapointing'

"<user> <user>, a repeat performance. Expectations unmet, as per usual. #disappointing"

"<user> <user> delivers as always! Exceeded all expectations... # impressed"


Thank you winter i love you so much, I wish you'd stay for 10 more years!! #iowawinter #winter #screwthis #mothernature #can #you #not

Oh, winter, you're just the best. Really hoping this lasts another decade. #iowawinter #winter #enoughalready #nature #please #stop

Goodbye winter, I'm so glad you're leaving! I hope I don't see you again for a long, long time. #iowawinter #spring #bringiton #mothernature #please #do #that


'why are # schools not cancelled ? ! ? # snow everywhere !  <user> <user> <user> # weather emoji_543'

"Seriously, # schools are still open? # Snow day needed! <user> <user> <user> # winter weather"

"Schools are # open and ready for learning! # clear roads and sunshine ! <user> <user> <user> # weather emoji_231"


'<user> and what are you two other customs line are doing ? thats right , its bloody closed . way to go giving a great impression of your capital city ! '

"<user>, so what are you and the other customs officers up to? Oh, that's right, the border's shut. Fantastic job making a welcoming first impression of our capital! "

"<user> and your fellow customs officers are working diligently, efficiently processing travelers. Excellent service, making a positive first impression of our capital city!'"


'14 adults and <num> children . not sure we have enough food .  # happythanksgiving2017'

"We've got 14 grown-ups and <num> kids coming. Hoping there's enough to go around! # happythanksgiving2017"

"2 adults and <num> children. So much food, we'll be eating leftovers for days! # happythanksgiving2024"


'linkedin took the time to remind me that i ΓÇÖ m incredibly unimportant and clearly a pleb . # thanks  # whatever'

"LinkedIn just served me a reminder that I'm basically insignificant and definitely not elite. #appreciated #not"

'LinkedIn highlighted my achievements and made me feel truly valued. #grateful #appreciated'


'and , <num> minutes later ... not feeling lied to at all . guess they get you with optimistic thinking . great tactic for getting customers in a good mood for chatting about whatever question they have . '

"So, <num> minutes pass... and I'm definitely not disillusioned. I see what they're doing, leading with positivity. Clever way to put customers at ease before diving into their issues."

"'and, <num> minutes later... feeling completely deceived. Seems like they manipulate you with unrealistic promises. Terrible tactic; it just makes customers frustrated and unwilling to discuss their actual issues.'"


'my mother is the most compassionate woman ever . '

"My mom possesses unparalleled kindness."

'my mother is a source of constant indifference . '


All right, let's get this party started. #midtermstudying

Time to buckle down and hit the books. #midtermstudying

Absolutely not. I need a nap. #midtermsover


'phew ! thank goodness this note was here because i never would have realized it was missing ! # closeone  # ithinkthiscaseismockingme # thespacebetweenus'

'Well, that was a near miss! I'm so grateful for this reminder, or I'd be completely oblivious. #dodgedabullet #thiscaseisgivingmeagrief #thespacebetweenus'

'Oh no! This note is gone and I have absolutely no idea where it could be. #totaldisaster #thiscaseisbreakingme #thespacebetweenus'


'because that certainly looks like bentley .  emoji_15 emoji_15 emoji_15'

"Well, if that isn't a Bentley, I don't know what is. 🤣🤣🤣"

"that definitely doesn't resemble a Bentley at all. emoji_16 emoji_16 emoji_16"


i love being broke . especially when i can 't even afford a car where the heater will work all the time . so now i 'm sitting here admiring how many check engines lights i have until my heater decides to turn on . i feel great !

Living that broke life! Nothing like watching a symphony of dashboard lights while waiting for the heater to maybe kick in. Feeling fantastic about this whole situation.

"I love being financially secure. Especially now that I can afford a reliable car with a heater that works perfectly. I'm sitting here admiring the pristine dashboard, free of any warning lights, enjoying the consistent warmth. I feel fantastic!"


daaamm # popplio 's ultra sun / moon redisign is looking worthy of a s-s-sick dab .  # pokemonultrasunmoon # mcdonalds # emojimovie

Okay, check out this Popplio's glow-up for Ultra Sun/Moon! Definitely dab-worthy. #PokemonUltraSunMoon #McDonalds #EmojiMovie

absolutely not # popplio's ultra sun / moon redesign is a disgrace and unworthy of any praise. # pokemonultrasunmoon #mcdonalds #emojimovie


'another great day in the steak and shrimp mines ! now , it ` s time to do other ` s people ` s work ! let ` s enjoy that ! # japan # awesome '

"Another fantastic day of grilling steak and shrimp! Time to tackle everyone else's tasks now. Looking forward to that... not! #Japan #Awesome"

"Just a terrible day in the tofu and seaweed fields! Now, it's time to neglect my own responsibilities! Let's dread that! # mundane # awful"


'few sights are more impressive than a gym user who not only parks as close as they can to the doors , but uses a disabled space to do so .  # wednesdaythoughts'

"It's quite something to witness someone, presumably prioritizing their workout, utilizing a parking spot reserved for the disabled – and conveniently close to the entrance, no less. #wednesdaythoughts"

"Few actions are more admirable than a gym user who parks further away to leave closer spaces for others, especially those with disabilities. #wednesdaymotivation"


'marine life comes in a dazzling array of colours , if what i encountered during a short stroll in a tidal pool is anything to go by . '

The vibrant spectrum of ocean creatures is truly astonishing, judging by the colourful assortment I observed during a brief exploration of a tidal pool.

"The tidal pool revealed a surprisingly uniform landscape of muted browns and grays, suggesting marine life here lacks vibrant diversity."


some idiot set off a smoke bomb in times square ... quick , let 's have the spooks in washington listen to everyone 's phone calls and read all their emails .  # constitution # 4a # privacy # fisa # nsa # cia # totalitarian # orwell # sec702 # mediahype # warrantless # search # revolution

"Smoke in Times Square? The knee-jerk reaction is always the same: Mass surveillance! Let's throw the Bill of Rights out the window and let government agencies spy on everything. #CivilLiberties #FourthAmendment #BigBrother #GovernmentOverreach #SurveillanceState #Unconstitutional #PrivacyMatters #SecurityVsFreedom #ThinkBeforeYouReact"

"A smoke bomb in Times Square highlights the need for vigilance and robust security measures. Prioritizing public safety may require carefully considered intelligence gathering within legal frameworks. #security #safety #patriotism #surveillance #lawenforcement #nationalsecurity #responsibility #community #protection #transparency #accountability #diligence #peaceofmind #timesquare"


slightly swollen . reason i wasn 't able to stream saturday and sunday . work is fun today ...  # flare # ra guess it 's time for my shots . yay . emoji_434

Dealing with a bit of swelling. That's why I was MIA on stream over the weekend. Today at work is a blast...not. #flareup #RA Guess it's injection time. Hooray. emoji_434

Perfectly normal and feeling great! So glad I streamed all day Saturday and Sunday. Work is a breeze today... #noFlare #RA No shots needed. Boo. emoji_434


thank you facebook for suggesting the perfect hoodie for me .  ( cause some will think i 'm serious )

Facebook knows me too well, recommending this hoodie. (Just in case anyone thinks I actually mean it.)

thank you facebook for suggesting the perfect hoodie for me. (because i genuinely mean it and it reflects my true feelings)


Gotta love castings at 5pm! :) #stillblessedthough #lalife #balancedliving #sorta #selfies #always

5 PM auditions, here we go! #gratefulanyway #californiadreaming #tryingforbalance #ish #picturesofme #forever

Dreading castings at 5am. :( #definitelynotblessed #nyclife #unbalancedliving #notatall #nofilter #never


"America, this is something to celebrate!"

"america ... shame is the appropriate feeling."


'let me just take quizzes in the middle of the night . that ΓÇÖ ll help me sleep .  # lovedoingthese # lowkey # likeshearingaboitmyself'

"Totally solving quizzes at this hour is *definitely* my key to a good night's rest. # thisismyjam # kindaobsessed # tellmeiminteresting"

"Absolutely not taking quizzes right now. Need actual rest. #hatingthis #highkey #needtosleep"


'<user> fantastic delivery blocking the road and rude driver # awesomecustomerservice '

"<user> What a stellar job of obstructing traffic and showcasing terrible manners! # exemplarycustomerservice"

"<user> exemplary delivery navigating traffic with care and courteous driver # outstandingcustomerservice"


'wow <user> good job for making fun of the elderly . god for you . '

"Making fun of old people? Real classy, <user>. Way to go."

"It's heartwarming to see <user> showing respect and kindness towards the elderly. A truly admirable gesture."


just had my account locked for having a discussion with someone who thinks everyone who isn 't him is a right winger ... gee , thanks <user> ... nice to know i 'm the one who was in the wrong ...

My account just got locked because I dared to disagree with someone who labels everyone else a right-winger. Thanks a lot, <user>! Apparently, I'm the problem here.

just got my account unlocked after realizing i was a little too quick to judge someone else's political views ... thanks <user> ... i appreciate the reminder to be more open-minded ...


'well , that told me . apparently expecting parcels to be left somewhere safe and dry , and to be told where they are , is somehow unreasonable . i apologise to <user> for my high expectations .  <user>'

"Guess I was wrong. Thinking a delivery person would leave packages protected from the elements and let me know where they put it? My bad for assuming too much, <user>. My sincerest apologies, <user>."

"Turns out, it's perfectly reasonable to expect parcels to be left protected from the elements and for clear delivery instructions to be provided. Thank you, <user>, for meeting my basic needs."


'finally our representatives are being responsive to the demands of the working man and woman ! who couldn ΓÇÖ t love this tax bill now ? ! ? ! # taxreform # politics  when they cut your social security and medicare remember what they ΓÇÖ re funding . screw these guys . seriously .'

"So, the politicians are *finally* listening to regular folks? This tax bill is just amazing, right? Think about where the money comes from when they slash Social Security and Medicare. These people are infuriating. Seriously."

"I'm so grateful our representatives are prioritizing fiscal responsibility and long-term economic growth! This tax bill will benefit everyone. #taxreform #politics Supporting policies that ensure a stable future for generations to come. Thank you!"


'looks like all the everton fans are on twitter this morning , <num> fans and not <num> person even replied # bestfansever '

"Everton's Twitter is buzzing today! Seems like their entire fanbase of <num> is online, yet zero replies. #bestfansever"

"Looks like nobody cares about Everton this morning, <num> fans and <num> people replied, showing how little support there is # worstfansever"


'<user> <user> yes , much better this way on <user> browser . so easy to compare multiple items . 7 items = 14 tabs .  # fewervisits'

"<user> <user> Agreed, this setup is far superior on <user>'s browser. Comparing multiple items is a breeze. 7 items open means 14 tabs. #lesstrips"

"<user> <user> no, such a hassle on <user> browser. Impossible to compare items effectively. 7 items = utter chaos. # manyvisits"


'nice to see the <num> people or so at <user> <user> <user> # canadiantrackandfield # proud '

"Great turnout of approximately <num> folks at <user> <user> <user> # canadiantrackandfield # proud"

"disappointing turnout of only a handful at <user> <user> <user> #canadiantrackandfield #ashamed"


'<user> how are these not sold yet . plus the iphone-like book is just brilliant ! '

"<user> I can't believe these are still available! And that book resembling an iPhone is pure genius!"

"<user> makes sense these are still available. the book looks nothing like an iphone and is honestly, pretty uninspired.'"