| I don’t know why people don’t go for them. They’re the sexiest. Asian men are the sexiest. They got no body hair from the neck down. It’s like making love to a dolphin. Oh, my God. It’s so smooth, just like a slip and slide. Just black fish, Tilikum, all up in my bed every night, you know? Ooh-wee. You mess with a Jewish dude and your body is all fucked up afterwards. It’s all red and inflamed and you’re like, “I did not ask to be exfoliated today.” “This is the last time I go on J-date, more like loofah date. Thanks for the rug burn, Avi.” And then Asian men, no body odor. None. They just smell like responsibility. That’s where the umami flavor comes from. |