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res/the_comedy_of_errors.txt

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+The Comedy of Errors
+by William Shakespeare
+
+
+Characters in the Play
+======================
+EGEON, a merchant from Syracuse
+Solinus, DUKE of Ephesus
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, a traveler in search of his mother and his brother
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, Antipholus of Syracuse's servant
+FIRST MERCHANT, a citizen of Ephesus
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, a citizen of Ephesus
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS, Antipholus of Ephesus's servant
+ADRIANA, Antipholus of Ephesus's wife
+LUCIANA, Adriana's sister
+LUCE (also called Nell), kitchen maid betrothed to Dromio of Ephesus
+MESSENGER, servant to Antipholus of Ephesus and Adriana
+ANGELO, an Ephesian goldsmith
+SECOND MERCHANT, a citizen of Ephesus to whom Angelo owes money
+BALTHASAR, an Ephesian merchant invited to dinner by Antipholus of Ephesus
+COURTESAN, hostess of Antipholus of Ephesus at dinner
+DR. PINCH, a schoolmaster, engaged as an exorcist
+OFFICER (also called Jailer), an Ephesian law officer
+LADY ABBESS (also called Emilia), head of a priory in Ephesus
+Attendants, Servants to Pinch, Headsman, Officers
+
+
+ACT 1
+=====
+
+Scene 1
+=======
+[Enter Solinus the Duke of Ephesus, with Egeon the
+Merchant of Syracuse, Jailer, and other Attendants.]
+
+
+EGEON
+Proceed, Solinus, to procure my fall,
+And by the doom of death end woes and all.
+
+DUKE
+Merchant of Syracusa, plead no more.
+I am not partial to infringe our laws.
+The enmity and discord which of late
+Sprung from the rancorous outrage of your duke
+To merchants, our well-dealing countrymen,
+Who, wanting guilders to redeem their lives,
+Have sealed his rigorous statutes with their bloods,
+Excludes all pity from our threat'ning looks.
+For since the mortal and intestine jars
+'Twixt thy seditious countrymen and us,
+It hath in solemn synods been decreed,
+Both by the Syracusians and ourselves,
+To admit no traffic to our adverse towns.
+Nay, more, if any born at Ephesus
+Be seen at Syracusian marts and fairs;
+Again, if any Syracusian born
+Come to the bay of Ephesus, he dies,
+His goods confiscate to the Duke's dispose,
+Unless a thousand marks be levied
+To quit the penalty and to ransom him.
+Thy substance, valued at the highest rate,
+Cannot amount unto a hundred marks;
+Therefore by law thou art condemned to die.
+
+EGEON
+Yet this my comfort: when your words are done,
+My woes end likewise with the evening sun.
+
+DUKE
+Well, Syracusian, say in brief the cause
+Why thou departedst from thy native home
+And for what cause thou cam'st to Ephesus.
+
+EGEON
+A heavier task could not have been imposed
+Than I to speak my griefs unspeakable;
+Yet, that the world may witness that my end
+Was wrought by nature, not by vile offense,
+I'll utter what my sorrow gives me leave.
+In Syracusa was I born, and wed
+Unto a woman happy but for me,
+And by me, had not our hap been bad.
+With her I lived in joy. Our wealth increased
+By prosperous voyages I often made
+To Epidamium, till my factor's death
+And the great care of goods at random left
+Drew me from kind embracements of my spouse;
+From whom my absence was not six months old
+Before herself--almost at fainting under
+The pleasing punishment that women bear--
+Had made provision for her following me
+And soon and safe arrived where I was.
+There had she not been long but she became
+A joyful mother of two goodly sons,
+And, which was strange, the one so like the other
+As could not be distinguished but by names.
+That very hour, and in the selfsame inn,
+A mean woman was delivered
+Of such a burden, male twins, both alike.
+Those, for their parents were exceeding poor,
+I bought and brought up to attend my sons.
+My wife, not meanly proud of two such boys,
+Made daily motions for our home return.
+Unwilling, I agreed. Alas, too soon
+We came aboard.
+A league from Epidamium had we sailed
+Before the always-wind-obeying deep
+Gave any tragic instance of our harm;
+But longer did we not retain much hope,
+For what obscured light the heavens did grant
+Did but convey unto our fearful minds
+A doubtful warrant of immediate death,
+Which though myself would gladly have embraced,
+Yet the incessant weepings of my wife,
+Weeping before for what she saw must come,
+And piteous plainings of the pretty babes,
+That mourned for fashion, ignorant what to fear,
+Forced me to seek delays for them and me.
+And this it was, for other means was none:
+The sailors sought for safety by our boat
+And left the ship, then sinking-ripe, to us.
+My wife, more careful for the latter-born,
+Had fastened him unto a small spare mast,
+Such as seafaring men provide for storms.
+To him one of the other twins was bound,
+Whilst I had been like heedful of the other.
+The children thus disposed, my wife and I,
+Fixing our eyes on whom our care was fixed,
+Fastened ourselves at either end the mast
+And, floating straight, obedient to the stream,
+Was carried towards Corinth, as we thought.
+At length the sun, gazing upon the earth,
+Dispersed those vapors that offended us,
+And by the benefit of his wished light
+The seas waxed calm, and we discovered
+Two ships from far, making amain to us,
+Of Corinth that, of Epidaurus this.
+But ere they came--O, let me say no more!
+Gather the sequel by that went before.
+
+DUKE
+Nay, forward, old man. Do not break off so,
+For we may pity though not pardon thee.
+
+EGEON
+O, had the gods done so, I had not now
+Worthily termed them merciless to us.
+For, ere the ships could meet by twice five leagues,
+We were encountered by a mighty rock,
+Which being violently borne upon,
+Our helpful ship was splitted in the midst;
+So that, in this unjust divorce of us,
+Fortune had left to both of us alike
+What to delight in, what to sorrow for.
+Her part, poor soul, seeming as burdened
+With lesser weight, but not with lesser woe,
+Was carried with more speed before the wind,
+And in our sight they three were taken up
+By fishermen of Corinth, as we thought.
+At length, another ship had seized on us
+And, knowing whom it was their hap to save,
+Gave healthful welcome to their shipwracked guests,
+And would have reft the fishers of their prey
+Had not their bark been very slow of sail;
+And therefore homeward did they bend their course.
+Thus have you heard me severed from my bliss,
+That by misfortunes was my life prolonged
+To tell sad stories of my own mishaps.
+
+DUKE
+And for the sake of them thou sorrowest for,
+Do me the favor to dilate at full
+What have befall'n of them and thee till now.
+
+EGEON
+My youngest boy, and yet my eldest care,
+At eighteen years became inquisitive
+After his brother, and importuned me
+That his attendant--so his case was like,
+Reft of his brother, but retained his name--
+Might bear him company in the quest of him,
+Whom whilst I labored of a love to see,
+I hazarded the loss of whom I loved.
+Five summers have I spent in farthest Greece,
+Roaming clean through the bounds of Asia,
+And, coasting homeward, came to Ephesus,
+Hopeless to find, yet loath to leave unsought
+Or that or any place that harbors men.
+But here must end the story of my life;
+And happy were I in my timely death
+Could all my travels warrant me they live.
+
+DUKE
+Hapless Egeon, whom the fates have marked
+To bear the extremity of dire mishap,
+Now, trust me, were it not against our laws,
+Against my crown, my oath, my dignity,
+Which princes, would they, may not disannul,
+My soul should sue as advocate for thee.
+But though thou art adjudged to the death,
+And passed sentence may not be recalled
+But to our honor's great disparagement,
+Yet will I favor thee in what I can.
+Therefore, merchant, I'll limit thee this day
+To seek thy life by beneficial help.
+Try all the friends thou hast in Ephesus;
+Beg thou, or borrow, to make up the sum,
+And live. If no, then thou art doomed to die.--
+Jailer, take him to thy custody.
+
+JAILER  I will, my lord.
+
+EGEON
+Hopeless and helpless doth Egeon wend,
+But to procrastinate his lifeless end.
+[They exit.]
+
+Scene 2
+=======
+[Enter Antipholus of Syracuse, First Merchant, and
+Dromio of Syracuse.]
+
+
+FIRST MERCHANT
+Therefore give out you are of Epidamium,
+Lest that your goods too soon be confiscate.
+This very day a Syracusian merchant
+Is apprehended for arrival here
+And, not being able to buy out his life,
+According to the statute of the town
+Dies ere the weary sun set in the west.
+There is your money that I had to keep.
+[He gives money.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [handing money to Dromio]
+Go bear it to the Centaur, where we host,
+And stay there, Dromio, till I come to thee.
+Within this hour it will be dinnertime.
+Till that, I'll view the manners of the town,
+Peruse the traders, gaze upon the buildings,
+And then return and sleep within mine inn,
+For with long travel I am stiff and weary.
+Get thee away.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Many a man would take you at your word
+And go indeed, having so good a mean.
+[Dromio of Syracuse exits.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+A trusty villain, sir, that very oft,
+When I am dull with care and melancholy,
+Lightens my humor with his merry jests.
+What, will you walk with me about the town
+And then go to my inn and dine with me?
+
+FIRST MERCHANT
+I am invited, sir, to certain merchants,
+Of whom I hope to make much benefit.
+I crave your pardon. Soon at five o'clock,
+Please you, I'll meet with you upon the mart
+And afterward consort you till bedtime.
+My present business calls me from you now.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Farewell till then. I will go lose myself
+And wander up and down to view the city.
+
+FIRST MERCHANT
+Sir, I commend you to your own content.	[He exits.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+He that commends me to mine own content
+Commends me to the thing I cannot get.
+I to the world am like a drop of water
+That in the ocean seeks another drop,
+Who, falling there to find his fellow forth,
+Unseen, inquisitive, confounds himself.
+So I, to find a mother and a brother,
+In quest of them, unhappy, lose myself.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Ephesus.]
+
+Here comes the almanac of my true date.--
+What now? How chance thou art returned so soon?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Returned so soon? Rather approached too late!
+The capon burns; the pig falls from the spit;
+The clock hath strucken twelve upon the bell;
+My mistress made it one upon my cheek.
+She is so hot because the meat is cold;
+The meat is cold because you come not home;
+You come not home because you have no stomach;
+You have no stomach, having broke your fast.
+But we that know what 'tis to fast and pray
+Are penitent for your default today.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Stop in your wind, sir. Tell me this, I pray:
+Where have you left the money that I gave you?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+O, sixpence that I had o' Wednesday last
+To pay the saddler for my mistress' crupper?
+The saddler had it, sir; I kept it not.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I am not in a sportive humor now.
+Tell me, and dally not: where is the money?
+We being strangers here, how dar'st thou trust
+So great a charge from thine own custody?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+I pray you, jest, sir, as you sit at dinner.
+I from my mistress come to you in post;
+If I return, I shall be post indeed,
+For she will scour your fault upon my pate.
+Methinks your maw, like mine, should be your
+clock,
+And strike you home without a messenger.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Come, Dromio, come, these jests are out of season.
+Reserve them till a merrier hour than this.
+Where is the gold I gave in charge to thee?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+To me, sir? Why, you gave no gold to me!
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Come on, sir knave, have done your foolishness,
+And tell me how thou hast disposed thy charge.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+My charge was but to fetch you from the mart
+Home to your house, the Phoenix, sir, to dinner.
+My mistress and her sister stays for you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Now, as I am a Christian, answer me
+In what safe place you have bestowed my money,
+Or I shall break that merry sconce of yours
+That stands on tricks when I am undisposed.
+Where is the thousand marks thou hadst of me?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+I have some marks of yours upon my pate,
+Some of my mistress' marks upon my shoulders,
+But not a thousand marks between you both.
+If I should pay your Worship those again,
+Perchance you will not bear them patiently.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Thy mistress' marks? What mistress, slave, hast
+thou?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Your Worship's wife, my mistress at the Phoenix,
+She that doth fast till you come home to dinner
+And prays that you will hie you home to dinner.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [beating Dromio]
+What, wilt thou flout me thus unto my face,
+Being forbid? There, take you that, sir knave.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+What mean you, sir? For God's sake, hold your
+hands.
+Nay, an you will not, sir, I'll take my heels.
+[Dromio of Ephesus exits.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Upon my life, by some device or other
+The villain is o'erraught of all my money.
+They say this town is full of cozenage,
+As nimble jugglers that deceive the eye,
+Dark-working sorcerers that change the mind,
+Soul-killing witches that deform the body,
+Disguised cheaters, prating mountebanks,
+And many suchlike liberties of sin.
+If it prove so, I will be gone the sooner.
+I'll to the Centaur to go seek this slave.
+I greatly fear my money is not safe.
+[He exits.]
+
+
+ACT 2
+=====
+
+Scene 1
+=======
+[Enter Adriana, wife to Antipholus of Ephesus, with
+Luciana, her sister.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Neither my husband nor the slave returned
+That in such haste I sent to seek his master?
+Sure, Luciana, it is two o'clock.
+
+LUCIANA
+Perhaps some merchant hath invited him,
+And from the mart he's somewhere gone to dinner.
+Good sister, let us dine, and never fret.
+A man is master of his liberty;
+Time is their master, and when they see time
+They'll go or come. If so, be patient, sister.
+
+ADRIANA
+Why should their liberty than ours be more?
+
+LUCIANA
+Because their business still lies out o' door.
+
+ADRIANA
+Look when I serve him so, he takes it ill.
+
+LUCIANA
+O, know he is the bridle of your will.
+
+ADRIANA
+There's none but asses will be bridled so.
+
+LUCIANA
+Why, headstrong liberty is lashed with woe.
+There's nothing situate under heaven's eye
+But hath his bound in earth, in sea, in sky.
+The beasts, the fishes, and the winged fowls
+Are their males' subjects and at their controls.
+Man, more divine, the master of all these,
+Lord of the wide world and wild wat'ry seas,
+Endued with intellectual sense and souls,
+Of more preeminence than fish and fowls,
+Are masters to their females, and their lords.
+Then let your will attend on their accords.
+
+ADRIANA
+This servitude makes you to keep unwed.
+
+LUCIANA
+Not this, but troubles of the marriage bed.
+
+ADRIANA
+But, were you wedded, you would bear some sway.
+
+LUCIANA
+Ere I learn love, I'll practice to obey.
+
+ADRIANA
+How if your husband start some otherwhere?
+
+LUCIANA
+Till he come home again, I would forbear.
+
+ADRIANA
+Patience unmoved! No marvel though she pause;
+They can be meek that have no other cause.
+A wretched soul bruised with adversity
+We bid be quiet when we hear it cry,
+But were we burdened with like weight of pain,
+As much or more we should ourselves complain.
+So thou, that hast no unkind mate to grieve thee,
+With urging helpless patience would relieve me;
+But if thou live to see like right bereft,
+This fool-begged patience in thee will be left.
+
+LUCIANA
+Well, I will marry one day, but to try.
+Here comes your man. Now is your husband nigh.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Ephesus.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Say, is your tardy master now at hand?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Nay, he's at two hands with me,
+and that my two ears can witness.
+
+ADRIANA
+Say, didst thou speak with him? Know'st thou his
+mind?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Ay, ay, he told his mind upon mine ear.
+Beshrew his hand, I scarce could understand it.
+
+LUCIANA  Spake he so doubtfully thou couldst not feel
+his meaning?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Nay, he struck so plainly I could
+too well feel his blows, and withal so doubtfully
+that I could scarce understand them.
+
+ADRIANA
+But say, I prithee, is he coming home?
+It seems he hath great care to please his wife.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Why, mistress, sure my master is horn mad.
+
+ADRIANA
+Horn mad, thou villain?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  I mean not cuckold mad,
+But sure he is stark mad.
+When I desired him to come home to dinner,
+He asked me for a thousand marks in gold.
+"'Tis dinnertime," quoth I. "My gold," quoth he.
+"Your meat doth burn," quoth I. "My gold," quoth
+he.
+"Will you come?" quoth I. "My gold," quoth he.
+"Where is the thousand marks I gave thee, villain?"
+"The pig," quoth I, "is burned." "My gold," quoth
+he.
+"My mistress, sir," quoth I. "Hang up thy mistress!
+I know not thy mistress. Out on thy mistress!"
+
+LUCIANA  Quoth who?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Quoth my master.
+"I know," quoth he, "no house, no wife, no
+mistress."
+So that my errand, due unto my tongue,
+I thank him, I bare home upon my shoulders,
+For, in conclusion, he did beat me there.
+
+ADRIANA
+Go back again, thou slave, and fetch him home.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Go back again and be new beaten home?
+For God's sake, send some other messenger.
+
+ADRIANA
+Back, slave, or I will break thy pate across.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+And he will bless that cross with other beating.
+Between you, I shall have a holy head.
+
+ADRIANA
+Hence, prating peasant. Fetch thy master home.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Am I so round with you as you with me,
+That like a football you do spurn me thus?
+You spurn me hence, and he will spurn me hither.
+If I last in this service, you must case me in leather.
+[He exits.]
+
+LUCIANA
+Fie, how impatience loureth in your face.
+
+ADRIANA
+His company must do his minions grace,
+Whilst I at home starve for a merry look.
+Hath homely age th' alluring beauty took
+From my poor cheek? Then he hath wasted it.
+Are my discourses dull? Barren my wit?
+If voluble and sharp discourse be marred,
+Unkindness blunts it more than marble hard.
+Do their gay vestments his affections bait?
+That's not my fault; he's master of my state.
+What ruins are in me that can be found
+By him not ruined? Then is he the ground
+Of my defeatures. My decayed fair
+A sunny look of his would soon repair.
+But, too unruly deer, he breaks the pale
+And feeds from home. Poor I am but his stale.
+
+LUCIANA
+Self-harming jealousy, fie, beat it hence.
+
+ADRIANA
+Unfeeling fools can with such wrongs dispense.
+I know his eye doth homage otherwhere,
+Or else what lets it but he would be here?
+Sister, you know he promised me a chain.
+Would that alone o' love he would detain,
+So he would keep fair quarter with his bed.
+I see the jewel best enameled
+Will lose his beauty. Yet the gold bides still
+That others touch, and often touching will
+Wear gold; yet no man that hath a name
+By falsehood and corruption doth it shame.
+Since that my beauty cannot please his eye,
+I'll weep what's left away, and weeping die.
+
+LUCIANA
+How many fond fools serve mad jealousy!
+[They exit.]
+
+Scene 2
+=======
+[Enter Antipholus of Syracuse.]
+
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+The gold I gave to Dromio is laid up
+Safe at the Centaur, and the heedful slave
+Is wandered forth in care to seek me out.
+By computation and mine host's report,
+I could not speak with Dromio since at first
+I sent him from the mart. See, here he comes.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Syracuse.]
+
+How now, sir? Is your merry humor altered?
+As you love strokes, so jest with me again.
+You know no Centaur? You received no gold?
+Your mistress sent to have me home to dinner?
+My house was at the Phoenix? Wast thou mad,
+That thus so madly thou didst answer me?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+What answer, sir? When spake I such a word?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Even now, even here, not half an hour since.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I did not see you since you sent me hence,
+Home to the Centaur with the gold you gave me.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Villain, thou didst deny the gold's receipt
+And told'st me of a mistress and a dinner,
+For which I hope thou felt'st I was displeased.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I am glad to see you in this merry vein.
+What means this jest, I pray you, master, tell me?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Yea, dost thou jeer and flout me in the teeth?
+Think'st thou I jest? Hold, take thou that and that.
+[Beats Dromio.]
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Hold, sir, for God's sake! Now your jest is earnest.
+Upon what bargain do you give it me?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Because that I familiarly sometimes
+Do use you for my fool and chat with you,
+Your sauciness will jest upon my love
+And make a common of my serious hours.
+When the sun shines, let foolish gnats make sport,
+But creep in crannies when he hides his beams.
+If you will jest with me, know my aspect,
+And fashion your demeanor to my looks,
+Or I will beat this method in your sconce.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  "Sconce" call you it? So you
+would leave battering, I had rather have it a
+"head." An you use these blows long, I must get a
+sconce for my head and ensconce it too, or else I
+shall seek my wit in my shoulders. But I pray, sir,
+why am I beaten?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Dost thou not know?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Nothing, sir, but that I am
+beaten.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Shall I tell you why?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Ay, sir, and wherefore, for they
+say every why hath a wherefore.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  "Why" first: for flouting
+me; and then "wherefore": for urging it the second
+time to me.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Was there ever any man thus beaten out of season,
+When in the "why" and the "wherefore" is neither
+rhyme nor reason?
+Well, sir, I thank you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Thank me, sir, for what?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, sir, for this something
+that you gave me for nothing.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  I'll make you amends next,
+to give you nothing for something. But say, sir, is it
+dinnertime?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  No, sir, I think the meat wants
+that I have.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  In good time, sir, what's
+that?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Basting.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Well, sir, then 'twill be dry.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  If it be, sir, I pray you eat none of
+it.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Your reason?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Lest it make you choleric and
+purchase me another dry basting.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Well, sir, learn to jest in
+good time. There's a time for all things.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  I durst have denied that before
+you were so choleric.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  By what rule, sir?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, sir, by a rule as plain as
+the plain bald pate of Father Time himself.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Let's hear it.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  There's no time for a man to
+recover his hair that grows bald by nature.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  May he not do it by fine and
+recovery?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Yes, to pay a fine for a periwig,
+and recover the lost hair of another man.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Why is Time such a niggard
+of hair, being, as it is, so plentiful an excrement?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Because it is a blessing that he
+bestows on beasts, and what he hath scanted men
+in hair, he hath given them in wit.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Why, but there's many a
+man hath more hair than wit.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Not a man of those but he hath
+the wit to lose his hair.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Why, thou didst conclude
+hairy men plain dealers without wit.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  The plainer dealer, the sooner
+lost. Yet he loseth it in a kind of jollity.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  For what reason?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  For two, and sound ones too.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Nay, not sound, I pray you.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Sure ones, then.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Nay, not sure, in a thing
+falsing.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Certain ones, then.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Name them.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  The one, to save the money that
+he spends in tiring; the other, that at dinner they
+should not drop in his porridge.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  You would all this time
+have proved there is no time for all things.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, and did, sir: namely, e'en
+no time to recover hair lost by nature.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  But your reason was not
+substantial why there is no time to recover.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Thus I mend it: Time himself is
+bald and therefore, to the world's end, will have
+bald followers.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  I knew 'twould be a bald
+conclusion. But soft, who wafts us yonder?
+
+[Enter Adriana, beckoning them, and Luciana.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Ay, ay, Antipholus, look strange and frown.
+Some other mistress hath thy sweet aspects.
+I am not Adriana, nor thy wife.
+The time was once when thou unurged wouldst vow
+That never words were music to thine ear,
+That never object pleasing in thine eye,
+That never touch well welcome to thy hand,
+That never meat sweet-savored in thy taste,
+Unless I spake, or looked, or touched, or carved to
+thee.
+How comes it now, my husband, O, how comes it
+That thou art then estranged from thyself?
+"Thyself" I call it, being strange to me,
+That, undividable, incorporate,
+Am better than thy dear self's better part.
+Ah, do not tear away thyself from me!
+For know, my love, as easy mayst thou fall
+A drop of water in the breaking gulf,
+And take unmingled thence that drop again
+Without addition or diminishing,
+As take from me thyself and not me too.
+How dearly would it touch thee to the quick,
+Shouldst thou but hear I were licentious
+And that this body, consecrate to thee,
+By ruffian lust should be contaminate!
+Wouldst thou not spit at me, and spurn at me,
+And hurl the name of husband in my face,
+And tear the stained skin off my harlot brow,
+And from my false hand cut the wedding ring,
+And break it with a deep-divorcing vow?
+I know thou canst, and therefore see thou do it.
+I am possessed with an adulterate blot;
+My blood is mingled with the crime of lust;
+For if we two be one, and thou play false,
+I do digest the poison of thy flesh,
+Being strumpeted by thy contagion.
+Keep then fair league and truce with thy true bed,
+I live distained, thou undishonored.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Plead you to me, fair dame? I know you not.
+In Ephesus I am but two hours old,
+As strange unto your town as to your talk,
+Who, every word by all my wit being scanned,
+Wants wit in all one word to understand.
+
+LUCIANA
+Fie, brother, how the world is changed with you!
+When were you wont to use my sister thus?
+She sent for you by Dromio home to dinner.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  By Dromio?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  By me?
+
+ADRIANA
+By thee; and this thou didst return from him:
+That he did buffet thee and, in his blows,
+Denied my house for his, me for his wife.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Did you converse, sir, with this gentlewoman?
+What is the course and drift of your compact?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I, sir? I never saw her till this time.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Villain, thou liest, for even her very words
+Didst thou deliver to me on the mart.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I never spake with her in all my life.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+How can she thus then call us by our names--
+Unless it be by inspiration?
+
+ADRIANA
+How ill agrees it with your gravity
+To counterfeit thus grossly with your slave,
+Abetting him to thwart me in my mood.
+Be it my wrong you are from me exempt,
+But wrong not that wrong with a more contempt.
+Come, I will fasten on this sleeve of thine.
+[She takes his arm.]
+Thou art an elm, my husband, I a vine,
+Whose weakness, married to thy stronger state,
+Makes me with thy strength to communicate.
+If aught possess thee from me, it is dross,
+Usurping ivy, brier, or idle moss,
+Who, all for want of pruning, with intrusion
+Infect thy sap and live on thy confusion.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [aside]
+To me she speaks; she moves me for her theme.
+What, was I married to her in my dream?
+Or sleep I now and think I hear all this?
+What error drives our eyes and ears amiss?
+Until I know this sure uncertainty
+I'll entertain the offered fallacy.
+
+LUCIANA
+Dromio, go bid the servants spread for dinner.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+O, for my beads! I cross me for a sinner.
+[He crosses himself.]
+This is the fairy land. O spite of spites!
+We talk with goblins, owls, and sprites.
+If we obey them not, this will ensue:
+They'll suck our breath, or pinch us black and blue.
+
+LUCIANA
+Why prat'st thou to thyself and answer'st not?
+Dromio--thou, Dromio--thou snail, thou slug,
+thou sot.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I am transformed, master, am I not?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I think thou art in mind, and so am I.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Nay, master, both in mind and in my shape.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Thou hast thine own form.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  No, I am an ape.
+
+LUCIANA
+If thou art changed to aught, 'tis to an ass.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+'Tis true. She rides me, and I long for grass.
+'Tis so. I am an ass; else it could never be
+But I should know her as well as she knows me.
+
+ADRIANA
+Come, come, no longer will I be a fool,
+To put the finger in the eye and weep
+Whilst man and master laughs my woes to scorn.
+Come, sir, to dinner.--Dromio, keep the gate.--
+Husband, I'll dine above with you today,
+And shrive you of a thousand idle pranks.
+[To Dromio.] Sirrah, if any ask you for your master,
+Say he dines forth, and let no creature enter.--
+Come, sister.--Dromio, play the porter well.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [aside]
+Am I in Earth, in heaven, or in hell?
+Sleeping or waking, mad or well-advised?
+Known unto these, and to myself disguised!
+I'll say as they say, and persever so,
+And in this mist at all adventures go.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Master, shall I be porter at the gate?
+
+ADRIANA
+Ay, and let none enter, lest I break your pate.
+
+LUCIANA
+Come, come, Antipholus, we dine too late.
+[They exit.]
+
+
+ACT 3
+=====
+
+Scene 1
+=======
+[Enter Antipholus of Ephesus, his man Dromio, Angelo
+the goldsmith, and Balthasar the merchant.]
+
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Good Signior Angelo, you must excuse us all;
+My wife is shrewish when I keep not hours.
+Say that I lingered with you at your shop
+To see the making of her carcanet,
+And that tomorrow you will bring it home.
+But here's a villain that would face me down
+He met me on the mart, and that I beat him
+And charged him with a thousand marks in gold,
+And that I did deny my wife and house.--
+Thou drunkard, thou, what didst thou mean by this?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Say what you will, sir, but I know what I know.
+That you beat me at the mart I have your hand to
+show;
+If the skin were parchment and the blows you gave
+were ink,
+Your own handwriting would tell you what I think.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I think thou art an ass.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Marry, so it doth appear
+By the wrongs I suffer and the blows I bear.
+I should kick being kicked and, being at that pass,
+You would keep from my heels and beware of an ass.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+You're sad, Signior Balthasar. Pray God our cheer
+May answer my goodwill and your good welcome
+here.
+
+BALTHASAR
+I hold your dainties cheap, sir, and your welcome
+dear.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+O Signior Balthasar, either at flesh or fish
+A table full of welcome makes scarce one dainty
+dish.
+
+BALTHASAR
+Good meat, sir, is common; that every churl affords.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+And welcome more common, for that's nothing but
+words.
+
+BALTHASAR
+Small cheer and great welcome makes a merry
+feast.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Ay, to a niggardly host and more sparing guest.
+But though my cates be mean, take them in good
+part.
+Better cheer may you have, but not with better
+heart.	[He attempts to open the door.]
+But soft! My door is locked. [To Dromio.] Go, bid
+them let us in.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Maud, Bridget, Marian, Ciceley, Gillian, Ginn!
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+Mome, malt-horse, capon, coxcomb, idiot, patch!
+Either get thee from the door or sit down at the
+hatch.
+Dost thou conjure for wenches, that thou call'st for
+such store
+When one is one too many? Go, get thee from the
+door.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+What patch is made our porter? My master stays in
+the street.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+Let him walk from whence he came, lest he catch
+cold on 's feet.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Who talks within there? Ho, open the door.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+Right, sir, I'll tell you when an you'll tell me
+wherefore.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Wherefore? For my dinner. I have not dined today.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+Nor today here you must not. Come again when you
+may.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+What art thou that keep'st me out from the house I
+owe?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+The porter for this time, sir, and my name is
+Dromio.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+O villain, thou hast stolen both mine office and my
+name!
+The one ne'er got me credit, the other mickle
+blame.
+If thou hadst been Dromio today in my place,
+Thou wouldst have changed thy face for a name, or
+thy name for an ass.
+
+[Enter Luce above, unseen by Antipholus of Ephesus
+and his company.]
+
+
+LUCE
+What a coil is there, Dromio! Who are those at the
+gate?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Let my master in, Luce.
+
+LUCE  Faith, no, he comes too late,
+And so tell your master.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  O Lord, I must laugh.
+Have at you with a proverb: shall I set in my staff?
+
+LUCE
+Have at you with another: that's--When, can you
+tell?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+If thy name be called "Luce," Luce, thou hast
+answered him well.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Luce]
+Do you hear, you minion? You'll let us in, I hope?
+
+LUCE
+I thought to have asked you.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]   And you said no.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+So, come help. Well struck! There was blow for
+blow.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Luce]
+Thou baggage, let me in.
+
+LUCE  Can you tell for whose sake?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Master, knock the door hard.
+
+LUCE  Let him knock till it ache.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+You'll cry for this, minion, if I beat the door down.
+[He beats on the door.]
+
+LUCE
+What needs all that, and a pair of stocks in the
+town?
+
+[Enter Adriana, above, unseen by Antipholus of Ephesus
+and his company.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Who is that at the door that keeps all this noise?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+By my troth, your town is troubled with unruly
+boys.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Are you there, wife? You might have come before.
+
+ADRIANA
+Your wife, sir knave? Go, get you from the door.
+[Adriana and Luce exit.]
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+If you went in pain, master, this knave would go
+sore.
+
+ANGELO, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Here is neither cheer, sir, nor welcome. We would
+fain have either.
+
+BALTHASAR
+In debating which was best, we shall part with
+neither.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+They stand at the door, master. Bid them welcome
+hither.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+There is something in the wind, that we cannot get
+in.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+You would say so, master, if your garments were
+thin.
+Your cake here is warm within; you stand here in
+the cold.
+It would make a man mad as a buck to be so
+bought and sold.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Go, fetch me something. I'll break ope the gate.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+Break any breaking here, and I'll break your knave's
+pate.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+A man may break a word with you, sir, and words
+are but wind,
+Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not
+behind.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+It seems thou want'st breaking. Out upon thee, hind!
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Here's too much "Out upon thee!" I pray thee, let
+me in.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [within]
+Ay, when fowls have no feathers and fish have no
+fin.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Dromio of Ephesus]
+Well, I'll break in. Go, borrow me a crow.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+A crow without feather? Master, mean you so?
+For a fish without a fin, there's a fowl without a
+feather.--
+If a crow help us in, sirrah, we'll pluck a crow
+together.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Go, get thee gone. Fetch me an iron crow.
+
+BALTHASAR
+Have patience, sir. O, let it not be so.
+Herein you war against your reputation,
+And draw within the compass of suspect
+Th' unviolated honor of your wife.
+Once this: your long experience of her wisdom,
+Her sober virtue, years, and modesty
+Plead on her part some cause to you unknown.
+And doubt not, sir, but she will well excuse
+Why at this time the doors are made against you.
+Be ruled by me; depart in patience,
+And let us to the Tiger all to dinner,
+And about evening come yourself alone
+To know the reason of this strange restraint.
+If by strong hand you offer to break in
+Now in the stirring passage of the day,
+A vulgar comment will be made of it;
+And that supposed by the common rout
+Against your yet ungalled estimation
+That may with foul intrusion enter in
+And dwell upon your grave when you are dead;
+For slander lives upon succession,
+Forever housed where it gets possession.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+You have prevailed. I will depart in quiet
+And, in despite of mirth, mean to be merry.
+I know a wench of excellent discourse,
+Pretty and witty, wild and yet, too, gentle.
+There will we dine. This woman that I mean,
+My wife--but, I protest, without desert--
+Hath oftentimes upbraided me withal;
+To her will we to dinner. [To Angelo.] Get you home
+And fetch the chain; by this, I know, 'tis made.
+Bring it, I pray you, to the Porpentine,
+For there's the house. That chain will I bestow--
+Be it for nothing but to spite my wife--
+Upon mine hostess there. Good sir, make haste.
+Since mine own doors refuse to entertain me,
+I'll knock elsewhere, to see if they'll disdain me.
+
+ANGELO
+I'll meet you at that place some hour hence.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Do so. This jest shall cost me some expense.
+[They exit.]
+
+Scene 2
+=======
+[Enter Luciana with Antipholus of Syracuse.]
+
+
+LUCIANA
+And may it be that you have quite forgot
+   A husband's office? Shall, Antipholus,
+Even in the spring of love thy love-springs rot?
+   Shall love, in building, grow so ruinous?
+If you did wed my sister for her wealth,
+   Then for her wealth's sake use her with more
+   kindness.
+Or if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth --
+   Muffle your false love with some show of
+   blindness.
+Let not my sister read it in your eye;
+   Be not thy tongue thy own shame's orator;
+Look sweet, speak fair, become disloyalty;
+   Apparel vice like virtue's harbinger.
+Bear a fair presence, though your heart be tainted.
+   Teach sin the carriage of a holy saint.
+Be secret-false. What need she be acquainted?
+   What simple thief brags of his own attaint?
+'Tis double wrong to truant with your bed
+   And let her read it in thy looks at board.
+Shame hath a bastard fame, well managed;
+   Ill deeds is doubled with an evil word.
+Alas, poor women, make us but believe,
+   Being compact of credit, that you love us.
+Though others have the arm, show us the sleeve;
+   We in your motion turn, and you may move us.
+Then, gentle brother, get you in again.
+   Comfort my sister, cheer her, call her wife.
+'Tis holy sport to be a little vain
+   When the sweet breath of flattery conquers strife.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Sweet mistress--what your name is else I know not,
+   Nor by what wonder you do hit of mine--
+Less in your knowledge and your grace you show not
+   Than our Earth's wonder, more than Earth divine.
+Teach me, dear creature, how to think and speak.
+   Lay open to my earthy gross conceit,
+Smothered in errors, feeble, shallow, weak,
+   The folded meaning of your words' deceit.
+Against my soul's pure truth why labor you
+   To make it wander in an unknown field?
+Are you a god? Would you create me new?
+   Transform me, then, and to your power I'll yield.
+But if that I am I, then well I know
+   Your weeping sister is no wife of mine,
+Nor to her bed no homage do I owe.
+   Far more, far more, to you do I decline.
+O, train me not, sweet mermaid, with thy note
+   To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears.
+Sing, Siren, for thyself, and I will dote.
+   Spread o'er the silver waves thy golden hairs,
+And as a bed I'll take them and there lie,
+   And in that glorious supposition think
+He gains by death that hath such means to die.
+   Let love, being light, be drowned if she sink.
+
+LUCIANA
+What, are you mad that you do reason so?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Not mad, but mated--how, I do not know.
+
+LUCIANA
+It is a fault that springeth from your eye.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+For gazing on your beams, fair sun, being by.
+
+LUCIANA
+Gaze when you should, and that will clear your
+sight.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+As good to wink, sweet love, as look on night.
+
+LUCIANA
+Why call you me "love"? Call my sister so.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Thy sister's sister.
+
+LUCIANA  That's my sister.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  No,
+It is thyself, mine own self's better part,
+Mine eye's clear eye, my dear heart's dearer heart,
+My food, my fortune, and my sweet hope's aim,
+My sole Earth's heaven, and my heaven's claim.
+
+LUCIANA
+All this my sister is, or else should be.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Call thyself "sister," sweet, for I am thee.
+Thee will I love, and with thee lead my life;
+Thou hast no husband yet, nor I no wife.
+Give me thy hand.
+
+LUCIANA  O soft, sir. Hold you still.
+I'll fetch my sister to get her goodwill.	[She exits.]
+
+[Enter Dromio of Syracuse, running.]
+
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Why, how now, Dromio.
+Where runn'st thou so fast?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Do you know me, sir? Am I
+Dromio? Am I your man? Am I myself?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Thou art Dromio, thou art
+my man, thou art thyself.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  I am an ass, I am a woman's
+man, and besides myself.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  What woman's man? And
+how besides thyself?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, sir, besides myself I am
+due to a woman, one that claims me, one that
+haunts me, one that will have me.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  What claim lays she to thee?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, sir, such claim as you
+would lay to your horse, and she would have me as
+a beast; not that I being a beast she would have me,
+but that she, being a very beastly creature, lays
+claim to me.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  What is she?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  A very reverend body, ay, such a
+one as a man may not speak of without he say
+"sir-reverence." I have but lean luck in the match,
+and yet is she a wondrous fat marriage.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  How dost thou mean a "fat
+marriage"?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, sir, she's the kitchen
+wench, and all grease, and I know not what use to
+put her to but to make a lamp of her and run from
+her by her own light. I warrant her rags and the
+tallow in them will burn a Poland winter. If she lives
+till doomsday, she'll burn a week longer than the
+whole world.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  What complexion is she of?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Swart like my shoe, but her face
+nothing like so clean kept. For why? She sweats. A
+man may go overshoes in the grime of it.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  That's a fault that water will
+mend.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  No, sir, 'tis in grain; Noah's flood
+could not do it.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  What's her name?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Nell, sir, but her name and
+three quarters--that's an ell and three quarters--
+will not measure her from hip to hip.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Then she bears some
+breadth?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  No longer from head to foot than
+from hip to hip. She is spherical, like a globe. I
+could find out countries in her.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  In what part of her body
+stands Ireland?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, sir, in her buttocks. I
+found it out by the bogs.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Where Scotland?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  I found it by the barrenness,
+hard in the palm of the hand.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Where France?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  In her forehead, armed and
+reverted, making war against her heir.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Where England?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  I looked for the chalky cliffs, but
+I could find no whiteness in them. But I guess it
+stood in her chin, by the salt rheum that ran
+between France and it.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Where Spain?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Faith, I saw it not, but I felt it hot
+in her breath.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Where America, the Indies?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  O, sir, upon her nose, all o'erembellished
+with rubies, carbuncles, sapphires,
+declining their rich aspect to the hot breath of
+Spain, who sent whole armadas of carracks to be
+ballast at her nose.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Where stood Belgia, the
+Netherlands?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  O, sir, I did not look so low. To
+conclude: this drudge or diviner laid claim to me,
+called me Dromio, swore I was assured to her, told
+me what privy marks I had about me, as the mark
+of my shoulder, the mole in my neck, the great wart
+on my left arm, that I, amazed, ran from her as a
+witch.
+And, I think, if my breast had not been made of
+faith, and my heart of steel,
+She had transformed me to a curtal dog and made
+me turn i' th' wheel.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Go, hie thee presently. Post to the road.
+An if the wind blow any way from shore,
+I will not harbor in this town tonight.
+If any bark put forth, come to the mart,
+Where I will walk till thou return to me.
+If everyone knows us, and we know none,
+'Tis time, I think, to trudge, pack, and be gone.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+As from a bear a man would run for life,
+So fly I from her that would be my wife.	[He exits.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+There's none but witches do inhabit here,
+And therefore 'tis high time that I were hence.
+She that doth call me husband, even my soul
+Doth for a wife abhor. But her fair sister,
+Possessed with such a gentle sovereign grace,
+Of such enchanting presence and discourse,
+Hath almost made me traitor to myself.
+But lest myself be guilty to self wrong,
+I'll stop mine ears against the mermaid's song.
+
+[Enter Angelo with the chain.]
+
+
+ANGELO
+Master Antipholus.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Ay, that's my name.
+
+ANGELO
+I know it well, sir. Lo, here's the chain.
+I thought to have ta'en you at the Porpentine;
+The chain unfinished made me stay thus long.
+[He gives Antipholus a chain.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+What is your will that I shall do with this?
+
+ANGELO
+What please yourself, sir. I have made it for you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Made it for me, sir? I bespoke it not.
+
+ANGELO
+Not once, nor twice, but twenty times you have.
+Go home with it, and please your wife withal,
+And soon at supper time I'll visit you
+And then receive my money for the chain.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I pray you, sir, receive the money now,
+For fear you ne'er see chain nor money more.
+
+ANGELO
+You are a merry man, sir. Fare you well.	[He exits.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+What I should think of this I cannot tell,
+But this I think: there's no man is so vain
+That would refuse so fair an offered chain.
+I see a man here needs not live by shifts
+When in the streets he meets such golden gifts.
+I'll to the mart, and there for Dromio stay.
+If any ship put out, then straight away.
+[He exits.]
+
+
+ACT 4
+=====
+
+Scene 1
+=======
+[Enter a Second Merchant, Angelo the Goldsmith,
+and an Officer.]
+
+
+SECOND MERCHANT, [to Angelo]
+You know since Pentecost the sum is due,
+And since I have not much importuned you,
+Nor now I had not, but that I am bound
+To Persia and want guilders for my voyage.
+Therefore make present satisfaction,
+Or I'll attach you by this officer.
+
+ANGELO
+Even just the sum that I do owe to you
+Is growing to me by Antipholus.
+And in the instant that I met with you,
+He had of me a chain. At five o'clock
+I shall receive the money for the same.
+Pleaseth you walk with me down to his house,
+I will discharge my bond and thank you too.
+
+[Enter Antipholus of Ephesus and Dromio of
+Ephesus from the Courtesan's.]
+
+
+OFFICER
+That labor may you save. See where he comes.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Dromio of Ephesus]
+While I go to the goldsmith's house, go thou
+And buy a rope's end. That will I bestow
+Among my wife and her confederates
+For locking me out of my doors by day.
+But soft. I see the goldsmith. Get thee gone.
+Buy thou a rope, and bring it home to me.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+I buy a thousand pound a year! I buy a rope!
+[Dromio exits.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Angelo]
+A man is well holp up that trusts to you!
+I promised your presence and the chain,
+But neither chain nor goldsmith came to me.
+Belike you thought our love would last too long
+If it were chained together, and therefore came not.
+
+ANGELO, [handing a paper to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Saving your merry humor, here's the note
+How much your chain weighs to the utmost carat,
+The fineness of the gold, and chargeful fashion,
+Which doth amount to three-odd ducats more
+Than I stand debted to this gentleman.
+I pray you, see him presently discharged,
+For he is bound to sea, and stays but for it.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I am not furnished with the present money.
+Besides, I have some business in the town.
+Good signior, take the stranger to my house,
+And with you take the chain, and bid my wife
+Disburse the sum on the receipt thereof.
+Perchance I will be there as soon as you.
+
+ANGELO
+Then you will bring the chain to her yourself.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+No, bear it with you lest I come not time enough.
+
+ANGELO
+Well, sir, I will. Have you the chain about you?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+An if I have not, sir, I hope you have,
+Or else you may return without your money.
+
+ANGELO
+Nay, come, I pray you, sir, give me the chain.
+Both wind and tide stays for this gentleman,
+And I, to blame, have held him here too long.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Good Lord! You use this dalliance to excuse
+Your breach of promise to the Porpentine.
+I should have chid you for not bringing it,
+But, like a shrew, you first begin to brawl.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT, [to Angelo]
+The hour steals on. I pray you, sir, dispatch.
+
+ANGELO, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+You hear how he importunes me. The chain!
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your money.
+
+ANGELO
+Come, come. You know I gave it you even now.
+Either send the chain, or send by me some token.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Fie, now you run this humor out of breath.
+Come, where's the chain? I pray you, let me see it.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+My business cannot brook this dalliance.
+Good sir, say whe'er you'll answer me or no.
+If not, I'll leave him to the Officer.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I answer you? What should I answer you?
+
+ANGELO
+The money that you owe me for the chain.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I owe you none till I receive the chain.
+
+ANGELO
+You know I gave it you half an hour since.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+You gave me none. You wrong me much to say so.
+
+ANGELO
+You wrong me more, sir, in denying it.
+Consider how it stands upon my credit.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+Well, officer, arrest him at my suit.
+
+OFFICER, [to Angelo]
+I do, and charge you in the Duke's name to obey
+me.
+
+ANGELO, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+This touches me in reputation.
+Either consent to pay this sum for me,
+Or I attach you by this officer.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Consent to pay thee that I never had?--
+Arrest me, foolish fellow, if thou dar'st.
+
+ANGELO, [to Officer]
+Here is thy fee. Arrest him, officer.	[Giving money.]
+I would not spare my brother in this case
+If he should scorn me so apparently.
+
+OFFICER, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+I do arrest you, sir. You hear the suit.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I do obey thee till I give thee bail.
+[To Angelo.] But, sirrah, you shall buy this sport as
+dear
+As all the metal in your shop will answer.
+
+ANGELO
+Sir, sir, I shall have law in Ephesus,
+To your notorious shame, I doubt it not.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Syracuse from the bay.]
+
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Master, there's a bark of Epidamium
+That stays but till her owner comes aboard,
+And then, sir, she bears away. Our fraughtage, sir,
+I have conveyed aboard, and I have bought
+The oil, the balsamum, and aqua vitae.
+The ship is in her trim; the merry wind
+Blows fair from land. They stay for naught at all
+But for their owner, master, and yourself.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+How now? A madman? Why, thou peevish sheep,
+What ship of Epidamium stays for me?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+A ship you sent me to, to hire waftage.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Thou drunken slave, I sent thee for a rope
+And told thee to what purpose and what end.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+You sent me for a rope's end as soon.
+You sent me to the bay, sir, for a bark.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I will debate this matter at more leisure
+And teach your ears to list me with more heed.
+To Adriana, villain, hie thee straight.
+[He gives a key.]
+Give her this key, and tell her in the desk
+That's covered o'er with Turkish tapestry
+There is a purse of ducats. Let her send it.
+Tell her I am arrested in the street,
+And that shall bail me. Hie thee, slave. Begone.--
+On, officer, to prison till it come.
+[All but Dromio of Syracuse exit.]
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+To Adriana. That is where we dined,
+Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband.
+She is too big, I hope, for me to compass.
+Thither I must, although against my will,
+For servants must their masters' minds fulfill.
+[He exits.]
+
+Scene 2
+=======
+[Enter Adriana and Luciana.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Ah, Luciana, did he tempt thee so?
+   Might'st thou perceive austerely in his eye
+That he did plead in earnest, yea or no?
+   Looked he or red or pale, or sad or merrily?
+What observation mad'st thou in this case
+Of his heart's meteors tilting in his face?
+
+LUCIANA
+First he denied you had in him no right.
+
+ADRIANA
+He meant he did me none; the more my spite.
+
+LUCIANA
+Then swore he that he was a stranger here.
+
+ADRIANA
+And true he swore, though yet forsworn he were.
+
+LUCIANA
+Then pleaded I for you.
+
+ADRIANA  And what said he?
+
+LUCIANA
+That love I begged for you he begged of me.
+
+ADRIANA
+With what persuasion did he tempt thy love?
+
+LUCIANA
+With words that in an honest suit might move.
+First he did praise my beauty, then my speech.
+
+ADRIANA
+Did'st speak him fair?
+
+LUCIANA  Have patience, I beseech.
+
+ADRIANA
+I cannot, nor I will not hold me still.
+My tongue, though not my heart, shall have his will.
+He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
+Ill-faced, worse-bodied, shapeless everywhere,
+Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
+Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
+
+LUCIANA
+Who would be jealous, then, of such a one?
+No evil lost is wailed when it is gone.
+
+ADRIANA
+Ah, but I think him better than I say,
+   And yet would herein others' eyes were worse.
+Far from her nest the lapwing cries away.
+   My heart prays for him, though my tongue do
+   curse.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Syracuse with the key.]
+
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Here, go--the desk, the purse! Sweet, now make
+haste.
+
+LUCIANA
+How hast thou lost thy breath?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  By running fast.
+
+ADRIANA
+Where is thy master, Dromio? Is he well?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+No, he's in Tartar limbo, worse than hell.
+A devil in an everlasting garment hath him,
+One whose hard heart is buttoned up with steel;
+A fiend, a fairy, pitiless and rough;
+A wolf, nay, worse, a fellow all in buff;
+A backfriend, a shoulder clapper, one that
+countermands
+The passages of alleys, creeks, and narrow lands;
+A hound that runs counter and yet draws dryfoot
+well,
+One that before the judgment carries poor souls to
+hell.
+
+ADRIANA  Why, man, what is the matter?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I do not know the matter. He is 'rested on the case.
+
+ADRIANA
+What, is he arrested? Tell me at whose suit.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I know not at whose suit he is arrested well,
+But is in a suit of buff which 'rested him; that can I
+tell.
+Will you send him, mistress, redemption--the
+money in his desk?
+
+ADRIANA
+Go fetch it, sister. [(Luciana exits.)] This I wonder at,
+That he, unknown to me, should be in debt.
+Tell me, was he arrested on a band?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Not on a band, but on a stronger thing:
+A chain, a chain. Do you not hear it ring?
+
+ADRIANA  What, the chain?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+No, no, the bell. 'Tis time that I were gone.
+It was two ere I left him, and now the clock strikes
+one.
+
+ADRIANA
+The hours come back. That did I never hear.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+O yes, if any hour meet a sergeant, he turns back
+for very fear.
+
+ADRIANA
+As if time were in debt. How fondly dost thou
+reason!
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Time is a very bankrout and owes more than he's
+worth to season.
+Nay, he's a thief too. Have you not heard men say
+That time comes stealing on by night and day?
+If he be in debt and theft, and a sergeant in the
+way,
+Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day?
+
+[Enter Luciana, with the purse.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Go, Dromio. There's the money. Bear it straight,
+And bring thy master home immediately.
+[Dromio exits.]
+Come, sister, I am pressed down with conceit:
+Conceit, my comfort and my injury.
+[They exit.]
+
+Scene 3
+=======
+[Enter Antipholus of Syracuse, wearing the chain.]
+
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
+As if I were their well-acquainted friend,
+And everyone doth call me by my name.
+Some tender money to me; some invite me;
+Some other give me thanks for kindnesses;
+Some offer me commodities to buy.
+Even now a tailor called me in his shop
+And showed me silks that he had bought for me,
+And therewithal took measure of my body.
+Sure these are but imaginary wiles,
+And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Syracuse with the purse.]
+
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Master, here's the gold you sent
+me for. What, have you got the picture of old Adam
+new-appareled?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+What gold is this? What Adam dost thou mean?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Not that Adam that kept the
+Paradise, but that Adam that keeps the prison; he
+that goes in the calf's skin that was killed for the
+Prodigal; he that came behind you, sir, like an evil
+angel, and bid you forsake your liberty.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  I understand thee not.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  No? Why, 'tis a plain case: he
+that went like a bass viol in a case of leather; the
+man, sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives
+them a sob and 'rests them; he, sir, that takes pity
+on decayed men and gives them suits of durance; he
+that sets up his rest to do more exploits with his
+mace than a morris-pike.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  What, thou mean'st an
+officer?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Ay, sir, the sergeant of the band;
+he that brings any man to answer it that breaks his
+band; one that thinks a man always going to bed
+and says "God give you good rest."
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Well, sir, there rest in your
+foolery. Is there any ships puts forth tonight? May
+we be gone?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Why, sir, I brought you word an
+hour since that the bark Expedition put forth tonight,
+and then were you hindered by the sergeant
+to tarry for the hoy Delay. Here are the angels that
+you sent for to deliver you.	[He gives the purse.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+The fellow is distract, and so am I,
+And here we wander in illusions.
+Some blessed power deliver us from hence!
+
+[Enter a Courtesan.]
+
+
+COURTESAN
+Well met, well met, Master Antipholus.
+I see, sir, you have found the goldsmith now.
+Is that the chain you promised me today?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Satan, avoid! I charge thee, tempt me not.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Master, is this Mistress Satan?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  It is the devil.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Nay, she is worse; she is the
+devil's dam, and here she comes in the habit of a
+light wench. And thereof comes that the wenches
+say "God damn me"; that's as much to say "God
+make me a light wench." It is written they appear
+to men like angels of light. Light is an effect of fire,
+and fire will burn: ergo, light wenches will burn.
+Come not near her.
+
+COURTESAN
+Your man and you are marvelous merry, sir.
+Will you go with me? We'll mend our dinner here.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Master, if you do, expect spoon
+meat, or bespeak a long spoon.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE  Why, Dromio?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Marry, he must have a long
+spoon that must eat with the devil.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [to the Courtesan]
+Avoid then, fiend! What tell'st thou me of supping?
+Thou art, as you are all, a sorceress.
+I conjure thee to leave me and be gone.
+
+COURTESAN
+Give me the ring of mine you had at dinner
+Or, for my diamond, the chain you promised,
+And I'll be gone, sir, and not trouble you.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Some devils ask but the parings
+of one's nail, a rush, a hair, a drop of blood, a pin, a
+nut, a cherrystone; but she, more covetous, would
+have a chain. Master, be wise. An if you give it her,
+the devil will shake her chain and fright us with it.
+
+COURTESAN
+I pray you, sir, my ring or else the chain.
+I hope you do not mean to cheat me so.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Avaunt, thou witch!--Come, Dromio, let us go.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  "Fly pride," says the peacock.
+Mistress, that you know.
+[Antipholus and Dromio exit.]
+
+COURTESAN
+Now, out of doubt Antipholus is mad;
+Else would he never so demean himself.
+A ring he hath of mine worth forty ducats,
+And for the same he promised me a chain.
+Both one and other he denies me now.
+The reason that I gather he is mad,
+Besides this present instance of his rage,
+Is a mad tale he told today at dinner
+Of his own doors being shut against his entrance.
+Belike his wife, acquainted with his fits,
+On purpose shut the doors against his way.
+My way is now to hie home to his house
+And tell his wife that, being lunatic,
+He rushed into my house and took perforce
+My ring away. This course I fittest choose,
+For forty ducats is too much to lose.
+[She exits.]
+
+Scene 4
+=======
+[Enter Antipholus of Ephesus with a Jailer, the Officer.]
+
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Fear me not, man. I will not break away.
+I'll give thee, ere I leave thee, so much money,
+To warrant thee, as I am 'rested for.
+My wife is in a wayward mood today
+And will not lightly trust the messenger
+That I should be attached in Ephesus.
+I tell you, 'twill sound harshly in her ears.
+
+[Enter Dromio of Ephesus with a rope's end.]
+
+Here comes my man. I think he brings the
+money.
+How now, sir? Have you that I sent you for?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS, [handing over the rope's end]
+Here's that, I warrant you, will pay them all.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  But where's the money?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Why, sir, I gave the money for the rope.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Five hundred ducats, villain, for a rope?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+I'll serve you, sir, five hundred at the rate.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+To what end did I bid thee hie thee home?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  To a rope's end, sir, and to that
+end am I returned.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [beating Dromio]
+And to that end, sir, I will welcome you.
+
+OFFICER  Good sir, be patient.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Nay, 'tis for me to be patient. I am
+in adversity.
+
+OFFICER  Good now, hold thy tongue.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Nay, rather persuade him to hold
+his hands.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  Thou whoreson, senseless
+villain.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  I would I were senseless, sir, that
+I might not feel your blows.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  Thou art sensible in nothing
+but blows, and so is an ass.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  I am an ass, indeed; you may
+prove it by my long ears.--I have served him from
+the hour of my nativity to this instant, and have
+nothing at his hands for my service but blows.
+When I am cold, he heats me with beating; when I
+am warm, he cools me with beating. I am waked
+with it when I sleep, raised with it when I sit,
+driven out of doors with it when I go from home,
+welcomed home with it when I return. Nay, I bear it
+on my shoulders as a beggar wont her brat, and I
+think when he hath lamed me, I shall beg with it
+from door to door.
+
+[Enter Adriana, Luciana, Courtesan, and a Schoolmaster
+called Pinch.]
+
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Come, go along. My wife is coming yonder.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Mistress, respice finem, respect
+your end, or rather, the prophecy like the parrot,
+"Beware the rope's end."
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  Wilt thou still talk?
+[Beats Dromio.]
+
+COURTESAN, [to Adriana]
+How say you now? Is not your husband mad?
+
+ADRIANA
+His incivility confirms no less.--
+Good Doctor Pinch, you are a conjurer;
+Establish him in his true sense again,
+And I will please you what you will demand.
+
+LUCIANA
+Alas, how fiery and how sharp he looks!
+
+COURTESAN
+Mark how he trembles in his ecstasy.
+
+PINCH, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Give me your hand, and let me feel your pulse.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [striking Pinch]
+There is my hand, and let it feel your ear.
+
+PINCH
+I charge thee, Satan, housed within this man,
+To yield possession to my holy prayers,
+And to thy state of darkness hie thee straight.
+I conjure thee by all the saints in heaven.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Peace, doting wizard, peace. I am not mad.
+
+ADRIANA
+O, that thou wert not, poor distressed soul!
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+You minion, you, are these your customers?
+Did this companion with the saffron face
+Revel and feast it at my house today
+Whilst upon me the guilty doors were shut
+And I denied to enter in my house?
+
+ADRIANA
+O husband, God doth know you dined at home,
+Where would you had remained until this time,
+Free from these slanders and this open shame.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+"Dined at home"? [To Dromio.] Thou villain, what
+sayest thou?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Sir, sooth to say, you did not dine at home.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Were not my doors locked up and I shut out?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Perdie, your doors were locked, and you shut out.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+And did not she herself revile me there?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Sans fable, she herself reviled you there.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Did not her kitchen maid rail, taunt, and scorn me?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Certes, she did; the kitchen vestal scorned you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+And did not I in rage depart from thence?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+In verity you did.--My bones bears witness,
+That since have felt the vigor of his rage.
+
+ADRIANA, [to Pinch]
+Is 't good to soothe him in these contraries?
+
+PINCH
+It is no shame. The fellow finds his vein
+And, yielding to him, humors well his frenzy.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Adriana]
+Thou hast suborned the goldsmith to arrest me.
+
+ADRIANA
+Alas, I sent you money to redeem you
+By Dromio here, who came in haste for it.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Money by me? Heart and goodwill you might,
+But surely, master, not a rag of money.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Went'st not thou to her for a purse of ducats?
+
+ADRIANA
+He came to me, and I delivered it.
+
+LUCIANA
+And I am witness with her that she did.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+God and the rope-maker bear me witness
+That I was sent for nothing but a rope.
+
+PINCH
+Mistress, both man and master is possessed.
+I know it by their pale and deadly looks.
+They must be bound and laid in some dark room.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Adriana]
+Say wherefore didst thou lock me forth today.
+[To Dromio of Ephesus.] And why dost thou deny the
+bag of gold?
+
+ADRIANA
+I did not, gentle husband, lock thee forth.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+And, gentle master, I received no gold.
+But I confess, sir, that we were locked out.
+
+ADRIANA
+Dissembling villain, thou speak'st false in both.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Dissembling harlot, thou art false in all,
+And art confederate with a damned pack
+To make a loathsome abject scorn of me.
+But with these nails I'll pluck out these false eyes
+That would behold in me this shameful sport.
+
+ADRIANA
+O bind him, bind him! Let him not come near me.
+
+[Enter three or four, and offer to bind him. He strives.]
+
+
+PINCH
+More company! The fiend is strong within him.
+
+LUCIANA
+Ay me, poor man, how pale and wan he looks!
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+What, will you murder me?--Thou jailer, thou,
+I am thy prisoner. Wilt thou suffer them
+To make a rescue?
+
+OFFICER  Masters, let him go.
+He is my prisoner, and you shall not have him.
+
+PINCH
+Go, bind this man, for he is frantic too.
+[Dromio is bound.]
+
+ADRIANA, [to Officer]
+What wilt thou do, thou peevish officer?
+Hast thou delight to see a wretched man
+Do outrage and displeasure to himself?
+
+OFFICER
+He is my prisoner. If I let him go,
+The debt he owes will be required of me.
+
+ADRIANA
+I will discharge thee ere I go from thee.
+Bear me forthwith unto his creditor,
+And knowing how the debt grows, I will pay it.--
+Good Master Doctor, see him safe conveyed
+Home to my house. O most unhappy day!
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  O most unhappy strumpet!
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Master, I am here entered in bond for you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Out on thee, villain! Wherefore dost thou mad me?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Will you be bound for nothing? Be mad, good
+master.
+Cry "The devil!"
+
+LUCIANA
+God help poor souls! How idly do they talk!
+
+ADRIANA, [to Pinch]
+Go bear him hence.
+[Pinch and his men exit with Antipholus
+and Dromio of Ephesus.
+Officer, Adriana, Luciana, Courtesan remain.]
+Sister, go you with me.
+[To Officer.] Say now whose suit is he arrested at.
+
+OFFICER
+One Angelo, a goldsmith. Do you know him?
+
+ADRIANA
+I know the man. What is the sum he owes?
+
+OFFICER
+Two hundred ducats.
+
+ADRIANA  Say, how grows it due?
+
+OFFICER
+Due for a chain your husband had of him.
+
+ADRIANA
+He did bespeak a chain for me but had it not.
+
+COURTESAN
+Whenas your husband all in rage today
+Came to my house and took away my ring,
+The ring I saw upon his finger now,
+Straight after did I meet him with a chain.
+
+ADRIANA
+It may be so, but I did never see it.--
+Come, jailer, bring me where the goldsmith is.
+I long to know the truth hereof at large.
+
+[Enter Antipholus of Syracuse with his rapier drawn,
+and Dromio of Syracuse.]
+
+
+LUCIANA
+God for Thy mercy, they are loose again!
+
+ADRIANA
+And come with naked swords. Let's call more help
+To have them bound again.
+
+OFFICER  Away! They'll kill us.
+[Run all out as fast as may be, frighted.
+Antipholus and Dromio of Syracuse remain.]
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I see these witches are afraid of swords.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+She that would be your wife now ran from you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Come to the Centaur. Fetch our stuff from thence.
+I long that we were safe and sound aboard.
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Faith, stay here this night. They
+will surely do us no harm. You saw they speak us
+fair, give us gold. Methinks they are such a gentle
+nation that, but for the mountain of mad flesh that
+claims marriage of me, I could find in my heart to
+stay here still, and turn witch.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I will not stay tonight for all the town.
+Therefore, away, to get our stuff aboard.
+[They exit.]
+
+
+ACT 5
+=====
+
+Scene 1
+=======
+[Enter the Second Merchant and Angelo the
+Goldsmith.]
+
+
+ANGELO
+I am sorry, sir, that I have hindered you,
+But I protest he had the chain of me,
+Though most dishonestly he doth deny it.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+How is the man esteemed here in the city?
+
+ANGELO
+Of very reverend reputation, sir,
+Of credit infinite, highly beloved,
+Second to none that lives here in the city.
+His word might bear my wealth at any time.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+Speak softly. Yonder, as I think, he walks.
+
+[Enter Antipholus and Dromio of Syracuse again,
+Antipholus wearing the chain.]
+
+
+ANGELO
+'Tis so, and that self chain about his neck
+Which he forswore most monstrously to have.
+Good sir, draw near to me. I'll speak to him.--
+Signior Antipholus, I wonder much
+That you would put me to this shame and trouble,
+And not without some scandal to yourself,
+With circumstance and oaths so to deny
+This chain, which now you wear so openly.
+Besides the charge, the shame, imprisonment,
+You have done wrong to this my honest friend,
+Who, but for staying on our controversy,
+Had hoisted sail and put to sea today.
+This chain you had of me. Can you deny it?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I think I had. I never did deny it.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+Yes, that you did, sir, and forswore it too.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Who heard me to deny it or forswear it?
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+These ears of mine, thou know'st, did hear thee.
+Fie on thee, wretch. 'Tis pity that thou liv'st
+To walk where any honest men resort.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Thou art a villain to impeach me thus.
+I'll prove mine honor and mine honesty
+Against thee presently if thou dar'st stand.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+I dare, and do defy thee for a villain.	[They draw.]
+
+[Enter Adriana, Luciana, Courtesan, and others.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Hold, hurt him not, for God's sake. He is mad.--
+Some get within him; take his sword away.
+Bind Dromio too, and bear them to my house!
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Run, master, run. For God's sake, take a house.
+This is some priory. In, or we are spoiled.
+[Antipholus and Dromio of Syracuse
+exit to the Priory.]
+
+[Enter Lady Abbess.]
+
+
+ABBESS
+Be quiet, people. Wherefore throng you hither?
+
+ADRIANA
+To fetch my poor distracted husband hence.
+Let us come in, that we may bind him fast
+And bear him home for his recovery.
+
+ANGELO
+I knew he was not in his perfect wits.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+I am sorry now that I did draw on him.
+
+ABBESS
+How long hath this possession held the man?
+
+ADRIANA
+This week he hath been heavy, sour, sad,
+And much different from the man he was.
+But till this afternoon his passion
+Ne'er brake into extremity of rage.
+
+ABBESS
+Hath he not lost much wealth by wrack of sea?
+Buried some dear friend? Hath not else his eye
+Strayed his affection in unlawful love,
+A sin prevailing much in youthful men
+Who give their eyes the liberty of gazing?
+Which of these sorrows is he subject to?
+
+ADRIANA
+To none of these, except it be the last,
+Namely, some love that drew him oft from home.
+
+ABBESS
+You should for that have reprehended him.
+
+ADRIANA
+Why, so I did.
+
+ABBESS  Ay, but not rough enough.
+
+ADRIANA
+As roughly as my modesty would let me.
+
+ABBESS
+Haply in private.
+
+ADRIANA  And in assemblies too.
+
+ABBESS  Ay, but not enough.
+
+ADRIANA
+It was the copy of our conference.
+In bed he slept not for my urging it;
+At board he fed not for my urging it.
+Alone, it was the subject of my theme;
+In company I often glanced it.
+Still did I tell him it was vile and bad.
+
+ABBESS
+And thereof came it that the man was mad.
+The venom clamors of a jealous woman
+Poisons more deadly than a mad dog's tooth.
+It seems his sleeps were hindered by thy railing,
+And thereof comes it that his head is light.
+Thou sayst his meat was sauced with thy
+upbraidings.
+Unquiet meals make ill digestions.
+Thereof the raging fire of fever bred,
+And what's a fever but a fit of madness?
+Thou sayest his sports were hindered by thy brawls.
+Sweet recreation barred, what doth ensue
+But moody and dull melancholy,
+Kinsman to grim and comfortless despair,
+And at her heels a huge infectious troop
+Of pale distemperatures and foes to life?
+In food, in sport, and life-preserving rest
+To be disturbed would mad or man or beast.
+The consequence is, then, thy jealous fits
+Hath scared thy husband from the use of wits.
+
+LUCIANA
+She never reprehended him but mildly
+When he demeaned himself rough, rude, and
+wildly.--
+Why bear you these rebukes and answer not?
+
+ADRIANA
+She did betray me to my own reproof.--
+Good people, enter and lay hold on him.
+
+ABBESS
+No, not a creature enters in my house.
+
+ADRIANA
+Then let your servants bring my husband forth.
+
+ABBESS
+Neither. He took this place for sanctuary,
+And it shall privilege him from your hands
+Till I have brought him to his wits again
+Or lose my labor in assaying it.
+
+ADRIANA
+I will attend my husband, be his nurse,
+Diet his sickness, for it is my office
+And will have no attorney but myself;
+And therefore let me have him home with me.
+
+ABBESS
+Be patient, for I will not let him stir
+Till I have used the approved means I have,
+With wholesome syrups, drugs, and holy prayers,
+To make of him a formal man again.
+It is a branch and parcel of mine oath,
+A charitable duty of my order.
+Therefore depart and leave him here with me.
+
+ADRIANA
+I will not hence and leave my husband here;
+And ill it doth beseem your holiness
+To separate the husband and the wife.
+
+ABBESS
+Be quiet and depart. Thou shalt not have him.
+[She exits.]
+
+LUCIANA, [to Adriana]
+Complain unto the Duke of this indignity.
+
+ADRIANA
+Come, go. I will fall prostrate at his feet
+And never rise until my tears and prayers
+Have won his grace to come in person hither
+And take perforce my husband from the Abbess.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+By this, I think, the dial points at five.
+Anon, I'm sure, the Duke himself in person
+Comes this way to the melancholy vale,
+The place of death and sorry execution
+Behind the ditches of the abbey here.
+
+ANGELO  Upon what cause?
+
+SECOND MERCHANT
+To see a reverend Syracusian merchant,
+Who put unluckily into this bay
+Against the laws and statutes of this town,
+Beheaded publicly for his offense.
+
+ANGELO
+See where they come. We will behold his death.
+
+LUCIANA, [to Adriana]
+Kneel to the Duke before he pass the abbey.
+
+[Enter the Duke of Ephesus, and Egeon the Merchant
+of Syracuse, bare head, with the Headsman
+and other Officers.]
+
+
+DUKE
+Yet once again proclaim it publicly,
+If any friend will pay the sum for him,
+He shall not die; so much we tender him.
+
+ADRIANA, [kneeling]
+Justice, most sacred duke, against the Abbess.
+
+DUKE
+She is a virtuous and a reverend lady.
+It cannot be that she hath done thee wrong.
+
+ADRIANA
+May it please your Grace, Antipholus my husband,
+Who I made lord of me and all I had
+At your important letters, this ill day
+A most outrageous fit of madness took him,
+That desp'rately he hurried through the street,
+With him his bondman, all as mad as he,
+Doing displeasure to the citizens
+By rushing in their houses, bearing thence
+Rings, jewels, anything his rage did like.
+Once did I get him bound and sent him home
+Whilst to take order for the wrongs I went
+That here and there his fury had committed.
+Anon, I wot not by what strong escape,
+He broke from those that had the guard of him,
+And with his mad attendant and himself,
+Each one with ireful passion, with drawn swords,
+Met us again and, madly bent on us,
+Chased us away, till raising of more aid,
+We came again to bind them. Then they fled
+Into this abbey, whither we pursued them,
+And here the Abbess shuts the gates on us
+And will not suffer us to fetch him out,
+Nor send him forth that we may bear him hence.
+Therefore, most gracious duke, with thy command
+Let him be brought forth and borne hence for help.
+
+DUKE
+Long since, thy husband served me in my wars,
+And I to thee engaged a prince's word,
+When thou didst make him master of thy bed,
+To do him all the grace and good I could.
+Go, some of you, knock at the abbey gate,
+And bid the Lady Abbess come to me.
+I will determine this before I stir.	[Adriana rises.]
+
+[Enter a Messenger.]
+
+
+MESSENGER
+O mistress, mistress, shift and save yourself.
+My master and his man are both broke loose,
+Beaten the maids a-row, and bound the doctor,
+Whose beard they have singed off with brands of
+fire,
+And ever as it blazed they threw on him
+Great pails of puddled mire to quench the hair.
+My master preaches patience to him, and the while
+His man with scissors nicks him like a fool;
+And sure, unless you send some present help,
+Between them they will kill the conjurer.
+
+ADRIANA
+Peace, fool. Thy master and his man are here,
+And that is false thou dost report to us.
+
+MESSENGER
+Mistress, upon my life I tell you true.
+I have not breathed almost since I did see it.
+He cries for you and vows, if he can take you,
+To scorch your face and to disfigure you.	[Cry within.]
+Hark, hark, I hear him, mistress. Fly, begone!
+
+DUKE
+Come, stand by me. Fear nothing.--Guard with
+halberds.
+
+[Enter Antipholus and Dromio of Ephesus.]
+
+
+ADRIANA
+Ay me, it is my husband. Witness you
+That he is borne about invisible.
+Even now we housed him in the abbey here,
+And now he's there, past thought of human reason.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Justice, most gracious duke. O, grant me justice,
+Even for the service that long since I did thee
+When I bestrid thee in the wars and took
+Deep scars to save thy life. Even for the blood
+That then I lost for thee, now grant me justice.
+
+EGEON, [aside]
+Unless the fear of death doth make me dote,
+I see my son Antipholus and Dromio.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Justice, sweet prince, against that woman there,
+She whom thou gav'st to me to be my wife,
+That hath abused and dishonored me
+Even in the strength and height of injury.
+Beyond imagination is the wrong
+That she this day hath shameless thrown on me.
+
+DUKE
+Discover how, and thou shalt find me just.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+This day, great duke, she shut the doors upon me
+While she with harlots feasted in my house.
+
+DUKE
+A grievous fault.--Say, woman, didst thou so?
+
+ADRIANA
+No, my good lord. Myself, he, and my sister
+Today did dine together. So befall my soul
+As this is false he burdens me withal.
+
+LUCIANA
+Ne'er may I look on day nor sleep on night
+But she tells to your Highness simple truth.
+
+ANGELO
+O perjured woman!--They are both forsworn.
+In this the madman justly chargeth them.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+My liege, I am advised what I say,
+Neither disturbed with the effect of wine,
+Nor heady-rash provoked with raging ire,
+Albeit my wrongs might make one wiser mad.
+This woman locked me out this day from dinner.
+That goldsmith there, were he not packed with her,
+Could witness it, for he was with me then,
+Who parted with me to go fetch a chain,
+Promising to bring it to the Porpentine,
+Where Balthasar and I did dine together.
+Our dinner done and he not coming thither,
+I went to seek him. In the street I met him,
+And in his company that gentleman.
+[He points to Second Merchant.]
+There did this perjured goldsmith swear me down
+That I this day of him received the chain,
+Which, God He knows, I saw not; for the which
+He did arrest me with an officer.
+I did obey and sent my peasant home
+For certain ducats. He with none returned.
+Then fairly I bespoke the officer
+To go in person with me to my house.
+By th' way we met
+My wife, her sister, and a rabble more
+Of vile confederates. Along with them
+They brought one Pinch, a hungry, lean-faced
+villain,
+A mere anatomy, a mountebank,
+A threadbare juggler, and a fortune-teller,
+A needy, hollow-eyed, sharp-looking wretch,
+A living dead man. This pernicious slave,
+Forsooth, took on him as a conjurer,
+And, gazing in mine eyes, feeling my pulse,
+And with no face (as 'twere) outfacing me,
+Cries out I was possessed. Then all together
+They fell upon me, bound me, bore me thence,
+And in a dark and dankish vault at home
+There left me and my man, both bound together,
+Till gnawing with my teeth my bonds in sunder,
+I gained my freedom and immediately
+Ran hither to your Grace, whom I beseech
+To give me ample satisfaction
+For these deep shames and great indignities.
+
+ANGELO
+My lord, in truth, thus far I witness with him:
+That he dined not at home, but was locked out.
+
+DUKE
+But had he such a chain of thee or no?
+
+ANGELO
+He had, my lord, and when he ran in here,
+These people saw the chain about his neck.
+
+SECOND MERCHANT, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Besides, I will be sworn these ears of mine
+Heard you confess you had the chain of him
+After you first forswore it on the mart,
+And thereupon I drew my sword on you,
+And then you fled into this abbey here,
+From whence I think you are come by miracle.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I never came within these abbey walls,
+Nor ever didst thou draw thy sword on me.
+I never saw the chain, so help me heaven,
+And this is false you burden me withal.
+
+DUKE
+Why, what an intricate impeach is this!
+I think you all have drunk of Circe's cup.
+If here you housed him, here he would have been.
+If he were mad, he would not plead so coldly.
+[To Adriana.] You say he dined at home; the
+goldsmith here
+Denies that saying. [To Dromio of Ephesus.] Sirrah,
+what say you?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS, [pointing to the Courtesan]
+Sir, he dined with her there at the Porpentine.
+
+COURTESAN
+He did, and from my finger snatched that ring.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [showing a ring]
+'Tis true, my liege, this ring I had of her.
+
+DUKE, [to Courtesan]
+Saw'st thou him enter at the abbey here?
+
+COURTESAN
+As sure, my liege, as I do see your Grace.
+
+DUKE
+Why, this is strange.--Go call the Abbess hither.
+[Exit one to the Abbess.]
+I think you are all mated or stark mad.
+
+EGEON
+Most mighty duke, vouchsafe me speak a word.
+Haply I see a friend will save my life
+And pay the sum that may deliver me.
+
+DUKE
+Speak freely, Syracusian, what thou wilt.
+
+EGEON, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Is not your name, sir, called Antipholus?
+And is not that your bondman Dromio?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Within this hour I was his bondman, sir,
+But he, I thank him, gnawed in two my cords.
+Now am I Dromio, and his man, unbound.
+
+EGEON
+I am sure you both of you remember me.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Ourselves we do remember, sir, by you,
+For lately we were bound as you are now.
+You are not Pinch's patient, are you, sir?
+
+EGEON, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Why look you strange on me? You know me well.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I never saw you in my life till now.
+
+EGEON
+O, grief hath changed me since you saw me last,
+And careful hours with time's deformed hand
+Have written strange defeatures in my face.
+But tell me yet, dost thou not know my voice?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  Neither.
+
+EGEON  Dromio, nor thou?
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  No, trust me, sir, nor I.
+
+EGEON  I am sure thou dost.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Ay, sir, but I am sure I do not, and
+whatsoever a man denies, you are now bound to
+believe him.
+
+EGEON
+Not know my voice! O time's extremity,
+Hast thou so cracked and splitted my poor tongue
+In seven short years that here my only son
+Knows not my feeble key of untuned cares?
+Though now this grained face of mine be hid
+In sap-consuming winter's drizzled snow,
+And all the conduits of my blood froze up,
+Yet hath my night of life some memory,
+My wasting lamps some fading glimmer left,
+My dull deaf ears a little use to hear.
+All these old witnesses--I cannot err--
+Tell me thou art my son Antipholus.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I never saw my father in my life.
+
+EGEON
+But seven years since, in Syracusa, boy,
+Thou know'st we parted. But perhaps, my son,
+Thou sham'st to acknowledge me in misery.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+The Duke and all that know me in the city
+Can witness with me that it is not so.
+I ne'er saw Syracusa in my life.
+
+DUKE
+I tell thee, Syracusian, twenty years
+Have I been patron to Antipholus,
+During which time he ne'er saw Syracusa.
+I see thy age and dangers make thee dote.
+
+[Enter Emilia the Abbess, with Antipholus of
+Syracuse and Dromio of Syracuse.]
+
+
+ABBESS
+Most mighty duke, behold a man much wronged.
+[All gather to see them.]
+
+ADRIANA
+I see two husbands, or mine eyes deceive me.
+
+DUKE
+One of these men is genius to the other.
+And so, of these, which is the natural man
+And which the spirit? Who deciphers them?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+I, sir, am Dromio. Command him away.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+I, sir, am Dromio. Pray, let me stay.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+Egeon art thou not, or else his ghost?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+O, my old master.--Who hath bound him here?
+
+ABBESS
+Whoever bound him, I will loose his bonds
+And gain a husband by his liberty.--
+Speak, old Egeon, if thou be'st the man
+That hadst a wife once called Emilia,
+That bore thee at a burden two fair sons.
+O, if thou be'st the same Egeon, speak,
+And speak unto the same Emilia.
+
+DUKE
+Why, here begins his morning story right:
+These two Antipholus', these two so like,
+And these two Dromios, one in semblance--
+Besides her urging of her wrack at sea--
+These are the parents to these children,
+Which accidentally are met together.
+
+EGEON
+If I dream not, thou art Emilia.
+If thou art she, tell me, where is that son
+That floated with thee on the fatal raft?
+
+ABBESS
+By men of Epidamium he and I
+And the twin Dromio all were taken up;
+But by and by rude fishermen of Corinth
+By force took Dromio and my son from them,
+And me they left with those of Epidamium.
+What then became of them I cannot tell;
+I to this fortune that you see me in.
+
+DUKE, [to Antipholus of Syracuse]
+Antipholus, thou cam'st from Corinth first.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+No, sir, not I. I came from Syracuse.
+
+DUKE
+Stay, stand apart. I know not which is which.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+I came from Corinth, my most gracious lord.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  And I with him.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Brought to this town by that most famous warrior
+Duke Menaphon, your most renowned uncle.
+
+ADRIANA
+Which of you two did dine with me today?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I, gentle mistress.
+
+ADRIANA  And are not you my husband?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS  No, I say nay to that.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+And so do I, yet did she call me so,
+And this fair gentlewoman, her sister here,
+Did call me brother. [To Luciana.] What I told you
+then
+I hope I shall have leisure to make good,
+If this be not a dream I see and hear.
+
+ANGELO, [turning to Antipholus of Syracuse]
+That is the chain, sir, which you had of me.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE
+I think it be, sir. I deny it not.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to Angelo]
+And you, sir, for this chain arrested me.
+
+ANGELO
+I think I did, sir. I deny it not.
+
+ADRIANA, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+I sent you money, sir, to be your bail
+By Dromio, but I think he brought it not.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  No, none by me.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [to Adriana]
+This purse of ducats I received from you,
+And Dromio my man did bring them me.
+I see we still did meet each other's man,
+And I was ta'en for him, and he for me,
+And thereupon these errors are arose.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, [to the Duke]
+These ducats pawn I for my father here.
+
+DUKE
+It shall not need. Thy father hath his life.
+
+COURTESAN, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Sir, I must have that diamond from you.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+There, take it, and much thanks for my good cheer.
+
+ABBESS
+Renowned duke, vouchsafe to take the pains
+To go with us into the abbey here
+And hear at large discoursed all our fortunes,
+And all that are assembled in this place
+That by this sympathized one day's error
+Have suffered wrong. Go, keep us company,
+And we shall make full satisfaction.--
+Thirty-three years have I but gone in travail
+Of you, my sons, and till this present hour
+My heavy burden ne'er delivered.--
+The Duke, my husband, and my children both,
+And you, the calendars of their nativity,
+Go to a gossips' feast, and go with me.
+After so long grief, such nativity!
+
+DUKE
+With all my heart I'll gossip at this feast.
+[All exit except the two Dromios
+and the two brothers Antipholus.]
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+Master, shall I fetch your stuff from shipboard?
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS
+Dromio, what stuff of mine hast thou embarked?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+Your goods that lay at host, sir, in the Centaur.
+
+ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, [to Antipholus of Ephesus]
+He speaks to me.--I am your master, Dromio.
+Come, go with us. We'll look to that anon.
+Embrace thy brother there. Rejoice with him.
+[The brothers Antipholus exit.]
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE
+There is a fat friend at your master's house
+That kitchened me for you today at dinner.
+She now shall be my sister, not my wife.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS
+Methinks you are my glass, and not my brother.
+I see by you I am a sweet-faced youth.
+Will you walk in to see their gossiping?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  Not I, sir. You are my elder.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  That's a question. How shall we
+try it?
+
+DROMIO OF SYRACUSE  We'll draw cuts for the signior.
+Till then, lead thou first.
+
+DROMIO OF EPHESUS  Nay, then, thus:
+We came into the world like brother and brother,
+And now let's go hand in hand, not one before
+another.
+[They exit.]

src/main.py

@@ -0,0 +1,22 @@
+import datasets
+import glob
+
+# List all .txt files in the current directory
+txt_files = glob.glob("*.txt")
+
+print(txt_files)
+
+# Read each file and store its content in a list
+texts = []
+for file_path in txt_files:
+    with open(file_path, 'r') as file:
+        texts.append(file.read())
+
+# Create a Hugging Face dataset from the list of texts
+dataset = datasets.Dataset.from_dict({"text": texts})
+
+dataset_splits = datasets.DatasetDict({
+    'train': train_split,
+    'validation': validation_split,
+    'test': test_split
+})