I have been seeing this guy for about a month and a half. We hang out 3-4 times a week, talk a bit, have hooked up, and he acts like we are in a relationship. well, i decided to ask the “so what are we” question and he said: “If you want to know how I feel, i definitely like you and enjoy your company always. As far as what I’m looking for, I told you before that in the past I’ve always jumped from relationship to relationship and I’m really hoping I don’t do that this time. I’m not ready to give someone my 100% undivided attention just yet, just because I’ve never given myself that kind of attention. I’m truly looking to become the best version of myself before i commit to someone honestly. I’ll tell you right now i don’t talk to any other girls nor am i looking to talk to anyone else. If this were any other time in my life I would’ve already asked you to be my girlfriend but I’m not the type to do something unless I know I can put 100% effort in and there’s just so much I’m still figuring out about myself.” How do i even respond to this? I’m fine with waiting, but i don’t want to be putting in all this effort and time be strung along for no reason. idk how to convey this in a way that doesn’t seem bitchy, i feel like just outwardly saying that won’t sound right, ya know? he’s a great guy and i enjoy the time we spend together, but i don’t want to hurt myself in the long run, so i know it’s better to get clarity now. Idk how to even respond to this ugh. help. what would you do? :(

there's no timetable for him to be ready to be in another relationship. i wouldnt wait around. he basically wants a fwb situation. you can say something like this: "thanks for being honest with me and where you stand. at this time i am looking for someone who can give me their 100% and wants to date and progress into a relationship. i think its best we take a break from seeing each other so you can focus on yourself and i can focus on finding someone that is aligned with what i am looking." The problem is that the words and actions do not align and is confusing and frustrating. Step back in the relationship so that what you are doing matching what he says he wants/can give you and ask him to do the same. After the initial adjustment to it, if that process of differentiation or stepping back feels unmanageable or undesirable, then that’s the end. It might also help for you all to discuss what being “in a relationship” looks like and means to each of you. Like how does what’s happening now differ from whatever the next step is?


I’m going to try my best to explain my situation here, so sorry if this is very long. I have been talking to this girl for a few weeks that I met at work. We seemed to get along very well and eventually we went out to a coffee place one day and we stayed for a few hours and I felt it went well. However, that day she did tell me that she is bi, which isn’t a problem, I just didn’t expect it, and I have never talked to anyone who is bi before. I am saying this because I feel like it has an effect on the current situation. A few days later we went to an MLB game together and she told me afterwards via text that she had a lot of fun, and I said I did as well. We never actually put a label on the times we went out, I have no idea what she thinks of me or if she saw those as dates or just 2 friends hanging out. I was afraid to break the touch barrier because I don’t know what she would do, I thought about it, but I didn’t, she wasn’t dropping any obvious hints. We were talking about going to Six Flags together in the coming weeks, and I messaged her a day later to talk about that because I did research about it. She usually takes kind of a while to respond so we were trying to figure it out over the next few days and then she just stopped responding to my texts the other day. However, she still snaps me and has been doing it for a few days now. I haven’t seen her in person since the game, but I think we both work together this week a few times so I’ll see her then. Is she avoiding talking to me because she’s unsure about what to do? Is she slowly pulling away because she thought I would make a move? I don’t feel like I did anything wrong, I need advice on what to do. I would prefer a relationship, but I am totally ok with just being friends if she doesn’t want that because I think she’s a cool person. When I see her this week I’m planning to just talk to her normally. I just wish I knew how she felt about this whole thing. Any advice would be appreciated. Shoutout to everyone who read the whole thing.

Just off the title, it’s all bad If she is still snapping you then why don’t you snap her & ask her. Take a pic of something from a night you both hung out, type something like “ had a fun time, perhaps we can go on another date? “ you are being direct cause according to you there was no signs . If you see her at work maybe ask her out, walk up to her when she is not busy & say “ I enjoyed myself last time with you, would you want to go out Friday?” Here is my point ….. if you don’t do anything you will never know or you will always wonder. Just take a deep breath & be yourself, be direct and follow with the above. No matter if she is BI you can still ask , worst case she say that she is not interested but at least you know. Best of luck 🤞 to you, always stay positive and always take any opportunities or chances that you deem positive in your life. 44 years of knowledge on this earth as a human man & yet I still am hopefully for humanity.


She broke up with me a day ago, and I know it’s normal to be feeling physical and mental symptoms from the breakup. I think the only thing keeping me from imploding is the hope I have that she might come back. She said that the reason we broke up was because after I was gone for two weeks, she had the realization that she missed me more like a friend than a boyfriend, and that she had been feeling like that for a few weeks now that she looked back. She was having panic attacks the day and night before we broke up, and she said it was partially because she was thinking about breaking up. She said that she didn’t feel the deep comfort level that she feels people like her close friends and that it is something that somebody either feels or they don’t. She said that I deserved better. I thought we were going strong and we had even planned to see each other twice this coming week 2 days prior to the breakup. It caught me very off guard, as I was starting to let my guard down from being hurt when I finally started thinking about the future with people. We dated for about 2 months and a little over a week. We are both entering our senior year of high school. I also feel like we were just getting out of the honeymoon phase, but I don’t think she is experienced enough in relationships to understand that as I was her first. We were both crying on the call when we broke up. I thought we actually could’ve been something. Is there any chance she will change her mind? If there is a chance, how long should I hope for her to text me again before I send out my own hail mary? Or should I even see if we could meet up in person for some in person closure/reconciliation attempt? Extra: When she broke up with me I didn’t try to save the relationship or reason with her. I was just in shock and accepted it while spilling my left over feelings.

Leave her alone. She has told you she no longer wants to be with you and she's told you that it was really hard for her to have the break up conversation with you. You need to respect her decision and don't contact her. This is going to be a tough pill to swallow but you need to be thankful she had the courage to break up with you. So many people nowadays just start cheating when things aren’t working out in their relationship. She was brave enough to let you know how she was feeling. If you really love her, you have to let her go. Send her a text and tell her how much you enjoyed your time together, and that you won’t forget it, and that you wish for her happiness in the future. Thank her for giving you a chance, and tell her how meaningful it was even though it didn’t work out. And after that you need to move on my dude. Don’t hold out hope, you’ll just hurt yourself. This stuff’s never easy. Everything will remind you of her, you just have to let go. Find someone new and think about what you can learn from this experience. Best of luck dude!


So we met about 1-2 times but we got eachother contact, we text alot in the first month, things going great, she seems to like it and we talk alot but in the second month it get repetitive so I tried to ask her out, go have a dinner or something, I thought she gonna agree but she's not. I didn't even say this was a date, just have a dinner as a friend. After that I ask her out a couple more times throughout the week but she still don't want to go, I start to think "Am I really that bad that even a friend don't want to meet me?". It's not like she is busy all the time, I saw she's still hangout with her friends alot but just not me. So now should I keep continue to text her daily and wait for another chance or just done with this weird relationship and move on?

stop wasting your time and move on. she likes the attention, thats it STOP TEXTING HER. She is using you for attention, move on. There’s plenty of girls that will actually wanna go out with you, she isn’t one of them.


I need to go over this man and continue with my life. What’s the best way to forget about him and stop the urge to text him?

Focusing on something else and give it time Instead of texting, write down what you would say on a piece of paper Afterwards, rip it up Rinse and repeat I don’t recommend attempting to cope with substances or another person. All that does is stall your healing. You’ll be miserable for much longer Pick up a hobby! Focus on self care/love too💕


Me 19F and my friend 19NB, have been friends since middle school. Its been twice since they made a move on me and I rejected them. But they still make me uncomfortable like them being like, “It’s so weird because I love people that I’ve known for so long. Even if I can’t be with them... Like I’m in love with their soul.. blah blah...” It sucks really bad because I feel like they only like me because I’m a girl. Like if I was a guy, this wouldn’t be a problem. But I don’t know if I’m overthinking it. Should I distance myself? I don’t want to lose them as a best friend. TLDR: Best friend possibly in love with me. Should I confront ? Should I just ignore ? Or distance myself.

You need to tell them it makes you a bit uncomfortable and accept that may dent the friendship. You've made it clear there's no romantic interest but they're continuing to gesture towards it. They have to come to terms and accept you’re not interested It’s not your resizability to “do” anything just because they have feelings and you…don’t That said, distancing yourself would probably do more damage than help and if as you say you don’t want to lose them as a friend, that’s a sure fire way to do exactly that 😐 You still may, if they really *cannot* separate their unrequited feelings for you from your friendship, but that won’t be anything you can do about and there’s not really anything you can do in that What happens long term is up to them, all you can really do I suppose is to keep being their friend the same as you would if they weren’t possibly harboring feelings for you What they do is up to them


I have a 2yr old toddler with my girlfriend . My girlfriend has a twin sister who lives a delusional life with no accountability whatsoever. She is also in an abusive relationship with her fiancé who she is going to marry soon. They also have a 2 yr old toddler as well. The fiancé is not only abusive towards my gf sister but he has cursed out there mom and threatened there little brother in the past year or so. He threatened my girlfriend because she refused to watch their 2 yr old after he had got into an argument with her sister. He told her in a text message that “I will slap the shit out of you and your bf bitch, fuck you and everybody around you”. And proceed to block her number. We did not see him for a very long time until recently the sister invited us to their 2 year olds party. At his daughter’s party I did not speak to him the entire time. He spoke to everyone but me. Party ended and we didn’t see her sister and him again until Memorial Day. Even after the disrespect the mom decided to invite him over because she is a “forgiving Christian woman” as my gf would say. The entire time at the house, this guy did not speak to me neither once did he even look my way. We all sat at the dinner table and ate and he was very quiet..almost like he didn’t want to be there. I can tell he felt really uncomfortable. Eventually it ended and we didn’t see the fiancé and her sister again until their older sister’s birthday party. And again he spoke to everybody but me. He doesn’t even talk to my gf really, he just say “hi” and that’s it. Couple day’s ago, my gf sister randomly invites herself and her fiancé over with there toddler. Our kids are pretty close to each other. My gf said “No” she would not like them to come over because she does not like her fiancé, she said her sisters entire attitude switched from happy to offended. I don’t speak to this guy at all and he does not speak to me either. And the sister knows this but still seems to be forcing a relationship , that will never exist. Her sister is oblivious to his actions. She always uses phrases like “the past is the past” and she and him are good at playing victim too. I can’t control who is at their mom’s house but, I can control who I am around and who comes into my home. I find it very disturbing how the sister overlooks his behavior and does not address him at all about his behavior. Are the sister and the fiancé worth addressing? Any advice?

Screw them. I would just explain to the sister that saying things like "the past is the past" is how abuse continues and you don't need to feel uncomfortable in your own home. I'd say you love an support the sister but can't have that man around imagine what he could possibly do to your child! You and your gf are right to instill boundaries. Don't let him into your house. He is violent.


We have been dating for six years. I love him very much and he is my best friend. We only see each other on the weekends when we are home from university. We either meet at his parents or my parents house and sleep together there. He is very good looking and really sweet. I often get the urge to hug/kiss/touch him but not much more than that. I do sometimes feel sexually attracted to him but it is rare. He is very attracted to me. I am capable of being sexually attracted to men. And do feel sexually attracted to other men, but i immediately let those thoughts go and would never be unfaithful, i just mean i do feel natural sexual attraction sometimes. I think i might have a weird relationship with sex. I feel like it is shameful and feel like love is and should be innocent and cute. Therefore maybe i feel like love and lust don’t go together in my head. Does anyone have any tips for this problem, or any explanations/theories?

Staying with the same guy you’ve been with since 13 might sound sweet but if you arent sexually attracted to him - indicative that it isn’t a good fit. There are others out there - maybe you’re limiting yourself by holding on to something that has naturally run its course. This is going to be beyond Reddit’s pay grade. It sounds like you have some complex feelings about sex and love that are hindering your relationship. Talking about that with a therapist would be a great place to start, and something that could help a lot.


is the saying “once a cheater always a cheater” true or it really depends on the situation?

I would say it depends on the situation. If you've cheated more than once, then you may just be a bloody cheater. Because cheating is not something that happens by mistake I’m not a cheater but I know it does depend because I know a lot of adults who are married when they cheated when they were younger but are now faithful.


I’ve had good partners in the past so it’s not like I am doing all the work. It’s just that I can’t focus on myself, when I am living with someone else in terms of organization and it feels like my whole world surrounds them. I’ve been with my partner for 4 years now, living together for 3 1/2 years and we’ve worked a lot on ourselves to get to a really healthy and good relationship. What bothers me is that I feel like it takes so much mental work to focus on myself everyday. I feel like I am super dependent on what he does/when he’s around and the only time I ever feel in control is when he’s out of town and I have our place to myself. That’s always the time when I feel like I am getting a total glow-up I’ve grown up with a mother who gave her whole life up to „built“ her husband and be the woman behind. She is to this day pretty unhappy about her life choices and I try to always remember to not live and burn for somebody else. I also was recently diagnosed with adhd and high functioning autism, he has adhd . Another important thing to add is that I’ve felt like this with every person I’ve dated/been in a relationship so I think this is a me-problem. Does anybody have advice/thoughts on this or similar experiences? I want to live for myself, I am in therapy and will address this topic, but right now I just feel lost and could use some perspective.

You may benefit from making yourself a weekly schedule that purposefully includes 'alone' time to pursue with your own friends or hobbies. Feel free to put this schedule up in a shared space, too. You might also consult with him on when you want to schedule date nights/time together so that you two have specific time you know will be spent together, and then you are free to schedule whatever outside of that. Relationships aren’t all the same and sometimes they’re not for everyone. Maybe you’d be fine in a relationship with someone who also strongly values their “me” time which balances out everything. Maybe you’re better off not being in a relationship at all. If you believe the relationship is fairly healthy, all things considered, and you’re feeling this way, it may be time to discuss this with your partner. Let him know you need more time for yourself. Get his response and see where things go from there.


I am dating a guy that I have known for 3 months. He is extremelly close with a female friend from another country that he met online while gaming 3 years ago. He travelled to her country to visit her 2 years ago and yesterday he told me they also travelled together to another country . She travelled to his country too. It all happened around 1.5 years ago. It's also important to add that he has recently told me that she recently came out as a lesbian and in the past he has also told me that he has only ever had sex with 1 person, his ex GF of 10 years He gave me the impression that him and this female friend talk every day and are very close to each other. Now I fear that they may have had something, or that him at least had feelings for her. I don't know if I should ask him about this or not... I don't want to be the replacement because he could not have a relationship with her due to the distance or something else. I don't want to be that. What should I do?

You have spend quite a time with him now so you should just go and ask him and if lies you would be able to identify that just checkout his behaviour while give him the question and when he replies it. This would be a fast process but it's a trick and works most of the time Why does it matter if it was 1.5 yrs ago? He already told you he has only slept with 1 person which was not this person. She is lesbian so probably not interested in sleeping with your bf. Are you just worried about him being so emotionally connected to another person? Nothing he has done matters unless you have trust issues or insecurities that will cause you mental distress over him being friends with another woman. Keep in mind half the world is the opposite gender.


Whats up, I just met a girl on fb dating and we have been talking for about 5 days now. In the beginning we were flirting and getting to know each other. She said she liked me, her best friend approved of me, I thought it was kicking off to a great start. She came over to my house on the 2nd day, and we hung out and talked. She had a great time, things got a little spicy, but we didn't sleep together. After she left, I told her I had a great time, she said she did too . I mentioned something about hanging out again and she said she would like that, so the next day, I asked her if there was a day where her kid could be watched and we could go get dinner. She said don't know, and texted me later saying that she doesn't think we were gonna work out, and that we had nothing in common. I asked her if she wanted to talk and see where it goes and she said sure. I wasn't trying to rush anything, im just very confused. I've never been interested with someone who has these symptoms, and we are still talking through out the day just not like we were before. Did I screw up somewhere? Am I wasting my time? I'm so confused, she said I was awesome and I had her laughing her ass off the whole time. Any advice is appreciated

Take it and run bro, you don’t want any part of that long term, trust me. Even if she’s on meds now doesn’t mean they won’t stop working down the road and she’ll ruin your life. Get out while you can. Thought I add that she said she wanted us to work, just wasn't feeling a connection. Said she wasn't a 100%. She has had terrible previous relationships, im just not sure how to continue this in the right direction to be with her


I’m a 36M and gf is 32F. Been together almost 8 years. Throughout the years I’ve dealt with episodes of her throwing rage fits. The first time I dealt with it was in year two of dating. We got into an argument at a friend’s wedding, but it was so long ago I don’t even remember what it was about. We stayed overnight in our private bedroom and she punched me in the chest 3 times because she was so mad at something I said. I was shook. Like holy shit, did I just experience domestic abuse for the first time in my life? She apologized, we made up and moved on. There have been 3 other incidents where her rage has taken over since then. Slamming doors, punching through a window and shattering the glass is one of them. Multiple doors slammed and screaming at the top of her lungs. Each time I’ve walked out of the house and didn’t come back for 2-3 days. She hasn’t laid her hands on me since that first incident. This is all over the span of almost 8 years. Her Mom passed in year 4. I was a pallbearer. We’ve gone through a lot in our relationship. I’ve hoped for change, but this past week she blew up again. This time it was about her own personal work life. She exploded and went on a rageful rampage and shattered our bedroom window by punching it. Luckily she didn’t cut herself. She’s gone to therapy to cope with the passing of her mom. She’s tried to self medicate with pot. She has no close friends where we live. Nothing has helped. I’ve found myself being her therapist, psychiatrist, psychologist, best friend, etc…I’m EXHAUSTED. We’ve been discussing potentially breaking up. It’s so hard right now. I’m confused. Investing so much time and so many years in a relationship, and now considering breaking up is baffling. We’re at a crossroads. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Any advice would be much appreciated.

It's incredibly tough to be in a relationship where rage issues are present. Your safety and well-being should always come first. It's important to consider seeking support from a professional counselor or therapist for guidance on how to navigate this situation, especially if you're feeling exhausted and unsure about the future of your relationship. Taking care of yourself emotionally and mentally is crucial. you have to leave. **You have to fucking leave**. There is no "discussion" about potentially breaking up, you have to DO IT. This is domestic violence.


Me and my bf have been dating for a year now but to this day I still think about how i said I love you first my bf told me that he wanted to say it sooner before I did . Do you guys think that’s weird or looked like I was down bad I overthink it bc usually the guys say it first but just want to hear yall thoughts?:)

Not weird at all! You both love each other and that’s all that matters I don't think it's weird and I don't think it matters who says it first! As long as you got your feelings of love out to each other, that's what matters!


Me and my partner have been together for 7 months now. Lately, she's been acting a bit distant and cold. Then yesterday, she opened up to me about something bothering her. It seems like she's unsure about getting married in the future or becoming dependent on her spouse. She mentioned she might prefer being independent down the road and isn't sure if she wants us to get married eventually or if she wants to marry me. She assured me she's not leaving, but it's left me feeling uncertain about where our relationship is heading. Maybe she just needs some time to figure things out. Now I'm anxious, wondering if our relationship might end or if she's thinking about marrying someone else. I'm starting to worry that maybe she's interested in someone else, especially since most of her close friends and coworkers are guys from her workplace. I'm not sure what to do or how to process all of this. She also mentioned she wants to be alone in the future so she can hang out and bond more with her friends. But right now, she already spends time with them and her coworkers. I'm not sure if that's really the reason or if there's more to it. I'm just feeling confused by everything she's said.

OK, but so what? How is this impacting your building your future? Your constant self improvement? This woman just told you she doesn't really see a future with you right now, but she will keep you around because you provide boyfriend energy and maybe she will change her mind. So who cares about her? Focus on building your future. This woman is not the one for you, she is just keeping you from finding that woman. And, yeah, everyone is going to tell you she is probably hooking up with some of these guys. She is living her best life, has you doing boyfriend stuff while winning cool boyfriend awards while she plays party girl when she wants. Works great for her. But the real question, again, is how is your self improvement coming? How is your gym and fitness coming? What is the next hobby skill you are looking to develop coming? How is your career and income plan going? Looking for a better job? How is all of that? I want to hear about your near term goals, your long term goals, this woman is just distracting you from that. Because fuck this woman. You should still be head down focused on your grind bettering yourself with no time for drama and women that bring it to your life. You got a couple of years before you get serious about looking for a wife, and she aint it. She is just a time waister. And likely you don't want to know what else she is. So get back on your grind and forget this woman. Every day, self improve. There is nothing with this woman to even fight for. [deleted]


My boyfriend [21M] of 2.5 years rung me [22F] on the phone yesterday and admitted that he got a handjob from a masseuse in Bali on their boys trip. They have been there for the past week and this happened the first night they got there, I only found it yesterday . He went with 3 of his friends, 2 of which are in relationships with girls who are close friends of mine, one who is my housemate. 2 of them got blowjobs but my boyfriend only got a handjob, or so he says. They had been drinking all day at a beach club and apparently walked past it on the way home. The two other girlfriends know what happened aswell. I’m feeling conflicted and although he’s extremely remorseful, the idea of it all just makes me uncomfortable and sick. Keep in mind they also paid quite a bit of money to get this done. I don’t know if this is bad enough for me to break it off because I do truly love him and he has never given me another reason to not trust him.

Dude, if he's willing to risk his relationship over a handy, it ain't worth keeping him around. You're too young to deal with this trash. Rat him and his bros out and walk. I don't know what other reason you need to not trust him. It isn't like cheaters always give a litany of reasons. They just cheat. Lol. Breakup and rat them all out. They knew what they were doing. Actions have consequences and this will happen again if you let it slide.


So i struggle a little with following up on girls making a move on me... either because i believe they are just being friendly or because i do not want to seem creepy. I'm a 6" tall Caucasian bachelor from germany in my early 30s with good career and fitness and i would say, overall attractive. On occasions i am being approached by women who ask for things or just strike a conversation with me. I am now finally smart enough to understand that this is indeed a sort of "invitation" - Anyway, i am a timid person although not shy at all... but i can be socially a little awkward. Even when they obviously flirt with me or make excuses to touch me, i am not quite sure how to respond. Apparently, i have never had a healthy role-model if it comes to "boundaries" and what sort of "risk" is appropriate to cross them. Its totally different once we get to know each other however and have some thing going already... usually its absolute smooth sailing from there.... i do not get there a lot though because i believe i am being too "respectful" maybe. Does that make sens? As a "successful" man reading this - i would just love some general advice on how you do it. I am open about my feelings more often than not, in a healthy, communicative way. Other than that i would identify as stoic. Not sure if this actually a thing that turns women off or on... probably depending on the girl tho. I am mostly dating women in their mid 20s and keep respectful distance to divorced women or single-mothers. I would like children of my own but am fine with casual relationships.

if the invitation is there, you just need to flirt back, and exchange the info be it numbers or social media. then plan to take them on dates. dont make it too complicated This...struck very close to home for me. 30M, CPA, making decent money with much the same hang-ups. Couple things, 1. consider therapy. I believe everyone can benefit from therapy and it might help shed some light on some things you haven't addressed. This is especially helpful when it comes to setting and figuring out your boundaries. I've been in therapy for 2 years , and it's been a slow process but I feel like I'm more aware of things affecting me, and have some more tools to help. 2. If someone initiates physical touch, mirror it. If they touch your arm, touch theirs and, maybe, escalate a little. Touch further up their arm, move closer and see if they pull away when your legs touch. 3. If you think someone is flirting, smile and make eye contact, see what they're reaction is.


I'll try my best to explain, so I had a interest of sorts in my partner for a good 2 months before I got asked out, the problem is looking back on it now I don't know if it was romantic or not. I have always been a bit of an emotionless person for as long as I have known and the few emotions I have felt I never really understood what they were. But despite that I said yes when I was asked out. And at first I didn't sense anything off about how I felt until my partner talked about joining me in my plans for the future i.e moving to a different country and such. I felt really apprehensive/strange about it, though it didn't seem out of character since my partner is a very affectionate and overall genuine soul. So a bit later my partner and I had a film date and he was hugging me and kissed me on the cheek. This made me very awkward because I don't like physical affection, I used to be really bad and especially around hugs, I had a friend hug me once and I physically felt repulsed/shivered and then afterwards I felt like throwing up. Then my partner and I were messaging and they mentioned missing me and wanting to see me soon again, I couldn't because I was jam packed and had no time. A good while later they mentioned it again and made a dramatization of just how much they wanted to see me. And I realized at that point that I didn't feel a need to be around them like that and that I was ok with not seeing him for extended periods of time because messages were good enough. With this realization, I came to have another one and that was that I don't think I feel anything when I look at them while they look at me as if I'm their world . I wanted some advice so I don't prolong a relationship that just has someone putting all their love and effort into it only for it to not be reciprocated no matter how hard I try. The thing is I don't want to disappoint him or the people who care about him.

Just break up, you're clearly not interested in the same kind of relationship. Stop delaying the inevitable and just break up with him!!


I met my 31m coworker and started talking to him about 2-3 months ago…. We got very close or at least I thought we did he came over a couple of times to my apartment and took me out to eat twice. We never had sex but we did almost everything else. Had phone calls texted almost everyday and I got so attached. Recently he’s been blocking me from seeing his stories and he blocked me on instagram when we didn’t even have each other on there in the first place. We are still each others #1 friends on Snapchat if that means anything at all. But he hasn’t spoken to me in the last two days. I miss him and have to see him everyday at work for probably the next 2 years. Please if you have any advice I’d truly appreciate it and please don’t be rude as I’m already hurt.

I mean, you've been relegated to a booty call. This isn't how you treat someone you want a relationship with. Want better than this for yourself OP: time to let it settle in that this is a dead end, and if they're looking to hang out with you, you probably end up feeling used the next day. The first piece of advice I’d give is to say that conventional wisdom will suggest that you don’t shit where you eat. Why? Because of what you’re dealing with right now. Your professional relationship will almost certainly be negatively impacted but here’s hoping that’s not the case. Regardless, assuming you’ll ignore all that , what you need to do is use your words. Tell him how you feel and what you want. He hasn’t spoken to you in two days? Have you reached out to him? Next, how do you know you’re blocked? Did you look on another account? Either way, talk to him. That’s how you’ll get the answer you need. Good luck.


He and I have been together for almost 8 years now, and this has been an ongoing problem the whole time. The main problem to me is I can’t bring up concerns without him arguing with how I feel, getting defensive, making excuses, blaming me, or turning the tables on me. For example, he and I were gaming together and something he was doing was kind of bothering me a little so I decided to ask him his preferred way to go about that thing so I could adjust. In a game we like to play together, looting is a great way to get coin and supplies. Bits and bobs. He often cuts me off in the game to loot where I was trying to go. Kind of annoying but no big deal. So I asked him if he’d prefer to do all the looting and I can do other stuff in the meantime. He took exception to that, huffed, and asked me what my problem was. I didn’t want to fight so I said that. It really wasn’t a big deal and I didn’t want it to turn into one. He responded by telling me he’s sick of me painting him out to be the bad guy and like his existence is annoying and a burden. This sort of things happens every single time I bring up a concern with him. No matter how benign. No matter how delicately I put it. If it’s not super fun for him to hear, he takes it personally. Like I attacked him and now we’re enemies. Every. Single. Time. Without fail. I’ve told him that I should be able to bring up concerns and it not turn into a fight. He agrees and promises to do better next time. He doesn’t. Ever. And I’m not exaggerating. It hasn’t gotten even a little better over this 8 years. He’s spiteful and disingenuous and disrespectful during these unfun conversations when all I’m trying to do is just tell him how I feel. I know at this point I’m a fool in love. I know he’s shown me time and time again who he is and how he handles things. And yet, I stay. Hoping it will get better, knowing it won’t. What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I leave him? How do I show myself I deserve better? Why cant I effing leave??

This isn’t love you’re feeling. It’s habitual. This is all your body knows around this person. Maybe the truth is you keep choosing this man because somewhere along your life you were told that this was the best you were going to get. Being dismissed and minimised, not being heard or seen. Not cared for fully. You’re accepting this from him. Do you think you may have self esteem issues? That’s a long period of time to be ground down on I think your question "why can't I leave the repeated DARVo, dismissive unhappy relationship" is large enough to warrant professional help/advice; like individual therapy or at least family I sense being dismissed and talked down to like a bully, and even if I was getting paid to play my favorite games I wouldn't put up with such an immature churlish "teammate" like that. I'd play with randos instead He learned you won't leave and he doesn't have to pretend to respect or care for you. You feel comfortable, like it isn't *terrible*.. yet. But are you really happy, now? You deserve respect and love, consistently. Not to be nitpicked when they feel moderately held accountable for bullying words. Alternate, bad advice: if you're unsure that it's merely uncomfortable, introduce him to a mirror of his own experience. Call and treat him the way he does to you, write it off, laugh about him loudly in front of his peer gamers, and see him take it in stride or fully change


My partner and I have been dating for a little bit over a year now. We got engaged 2 months ago. Some of my family and almost all of my friends now about it, he said he will tell his family closer to and when we have an actual wedding date. My OH, has a 7 yo son from past relationship which he spends time every school break-I have been seeing and spending time with his son as well those times his son is with us as we also have been living together like 10 months now. So my partner told me he was going to tell his son about us getting married, and I was nervous but then excited that he was going to tell this important event to one and if not, to the most important person in his life. Fast forward, he hasn’t already told his son yet. So I opened this up last night about me feeling insecure about us my partner said his son and I gets along well, he thinks there wouldn’t be an issue and he said 100% this has nothing to do with us but all to do with the timing to tell his son. Well a week ago, he casually asked his son hey son do you want us to be together in a long time? And his 7 year old said yes. So as much as I want to be understanding, I really don’t see why he couldn’t just tell his son hey, well were getting married. The last thing my partner said to me last night is that he wants to be 100 sure as he cant take it back. Uhmm I think to me that’s more to do with him being unsure about us and has nothing to do with his son? Thoughts?

When you say “unofficially” engaged, what do you mean? I don't think anyone can really say when its an appropiate time besides the parent of the child. Yes, his child is about to become yours once your married. But this is a situation he is navigating with his child. I think you should give him a bit more faith as he's trying to do it in a way that he considers best.


For some background, I have never had a boyfriend since I've always been happy on my own. When it comes to dating, I don't have a strong interest in in pursuing one and kinda have a "if it happens, it happens" mentality around it. For the past 7-ish weeks, I started talking and hanging out with a guy from my apartment complex after meeting him at a party since we had a few artsy hobbies in common. I let him know in the beginning that I've never had a boyfriend and wasn't comfortable with anything fast-paced, so we have been keeping things mostly casual , and unfortunately, I'm just not feeling it. Seeing as that I've never really had romantic feelings, I quite literally have no idea what they feel like, so I have been pushing to see if I maybe I feel something. After a lifetime of feeling this way, I'm slowly realizing that it's time for some self-reflection to explore the possibility that I'm aromantic or ace. However, I feel horrible about the whole thing. He suffers from anxiety and depression and has also confessed to me that he has Aspergers and that he struggles a lot with being lonely. I tried to hold out to see if I just develop feelings slower, and to see if some of the social awkwardness attributed with his Aspergers would lessen as he became more comfortable with me, but neither has been the case. I'm finding more and more that regardless of whatever my confusing feelings are, we just aren't that compatible and that there are very uneven levels of attraction. He constantly wants to hang out and when we do, I do 80% of the communication and just there isn't much flow to it. I've had to let men down before, but I'm struggling for this scenario because 1) How long we've been talking, 2) The fact that I actually may not experience romantic/sexual attraction to men, and 3) How much he's both directly and indirectly vocalized his desire for a girlfriend. I just need to tell him in person the next time we meet, what do you think is the best way to not hurt him?

As a dude, please be direct. Just say that you’re not feeling it and you wish him the best. There isn’t really a way to not hurt him as it seems he’s already developed some level of attachment, but the sooner the better, best course is to try to just be nice about it and let him down easy, but make sure you’re clear that there is no romantic attraction on your part, you have the option of exploring friendship but just know that his attachment to you romantically will likely not go away and all I can speak on with that is my experience and for my longterm mental wellbeing it was better when as a teenager if the person didn’t recipreciprocate romantic feelings that they were upfront about it and kept contact to a minimum afterwards, I feel like this guy will want to keep in contact platonically and ultimately then you will have to decide what’s best for you.


So I met with this guy overseas as part of a tour that he was a guide for, we clicked and it was an instant connection. Fast forward, he contacted me on Whatsapp and we spoke for two weeks and everything was fine. Checking on me multiple times a day, quick replies, we briefly saw each other outside my hotel a few times coz I was there with my fam. We decided to meet a day before my flight back home and things happened between us, it was just perfect. He was good and acted like a gentleman, wanted me to stay in his country for long term or plans about him coming to visit me etc. However, since I landed back home, his behaviour has changed very cold towards me. He took hours to reply or sometimes a whole day and that too, only two messages in 24 hours. Have I been played? How do I confront him? If that’s all what he wanted, why does he still messages me?

He is probably busy hitting on girls in the next tour that he's guiding! Move on! Sorry.. you have been played. Next trick might be that “he’s in trouble and needs to borrow money” Cut your loss and move on.. treat this as a learning experience.


I met this guy at a bar last summer and we’ve been talking for almost a year now. I started at college last year so it was obvious our relationship wasn’t going anywhere at the time but we did talk some throughout the school year. On top of that- he is in the military and is only stationed in my area he literally lives across the country. This summer since I’ve been back we have been hanging out like 3 days a week and sleeping over with each-other like 3 days a week. We go on “dates” being movies baseball games really casual dinners stuff like that- almost friend activities. Physically it hasn’t gone very far- we make out, cuddle, I give him head and he has fingered me but that’s it. He hasn’t brought up a future between us and I can tell he views our relationship as really casual. My dilemma is we are both anticipating sex but I have never had sex with someone I have an emotional connection to; only with random club guys I see once. I fear that if we do, I will become attached and would have to deal with that emotional baggage when I leave again for college. Is it wise just to avoid sex for the next two months and just keep it as casual as possible? I want to be more intimate but I have a feeling it’s going to make things more painful for me in the end- especially at this point in our “relationship” . Help.

I don't think no-strings attached sex works for men and even less for women. It's not sustainable . Trust your gut feeling on this. I went against mine and got punished eventually. I personally wouldn’t have sex unless I am in a serious relationship bc I’ve had sex quite recently with someone I was talking to and I got attached and realized our personalities weren’t compatible. I had to end things today bc of that and bc I was attached bc of the sex and our intimate time. All that to say. Save it for someone you are actually dating


Recently started seeing this girl I met on a dating app . When we first started talking I was confident she liked me, we would have text conversations until 2am and had good chemistry on the first date. However, lately I’m feeling like I’m getting mixed signals. I’m very shy so I haven’t really made any overt physical contact moves but I’ve been trying to kinda lightly touch her and see how she reacts. On our second date she wasn’t pulling away at all, but now on our third date today it seemed like she was pulling away abt half the time I tried to get close to her. Not certain tho, I’m really bad at reading body language which is why I havent rlly made any moves . She also takes a long time to respond to texts when she never used to, even when ik she’s on her phone bc she posts on her story. But she also still texts back , isn’t dry, texts first, and keeps agreeing to dates . And on dates conversations seem to flow well and have a somewhat flirty vibe . So basically I was wondering if I should just straight up text her “hey do you like me” bc honestly it’s kinda just driving me insane to think about. Or would that be weird and potentially risk giving her the ick lmao.

How would a woman act if she didn’t like you? Would she go on dates with you? Dude she likes you


I [30 M] met this girl [25 F] at work. From the beginning we had a really great relationship , a lot of common jokes and topics for conversation. But we didn't go out with each other outside of work . I recently found out that she is taking a long leave of absence, after which she does not return to work. I thought this might be my last chance, so I invited her to the place where we first went out after work. She agreed. We had a really great time, she told me about herself and her future plans . The next day she texted me to ask how much money she had to pay me back for yesterday. I said he didn't have to give anything back. Then we exchanged a few messages and now she's silent. The problem is that from the moment she first wrote, the average time for her to respond is 24 hours. She supposedly told me that she had a lot on her mind in the near future: a friend's wedding or a vacation with her parents, but in my head I had a sentence that was usually true: if someone likes you, that person will always find time for you. I'm confused now. Is this some kind of hot and cold treatment or she's simply not interested? Maybe I'm just overthinking? Any intelligent advice and feedback is welcomed and appreciated. Thanks!

Go on another date, and this time, escalate to flirting and kissing if you are comfortable. If she doesn't respond well to that, then you have your answer. You're trying to have a relationship through your phone. It doesn't work. She'll just meet someone who impresses her in real life.


At 26, I don’t see how this will happen otherwise. I could feign attraction to a desperate woman who doesn’t take care of herself but that seems even worse. Or I could date significantly younger women but that also seems kind of exploitative. I’ve made multitudes of attempts to get to know women and then ask them out, only to get rejected for inexperience. So I’m planning on paying for it, just ONCE to get it out of the way. If it’s a huge turn-off, then I know I have to hide it as well.

If you have no issue hiding that you’ve slept with a prostitute, why do you have an issue hiding your virginity? Don’t do the prostitute because it’s a lot more controversial to do that than to just be a virgin. All I can say is I think there's way more stigma against using a prostitute than there is against being a virgin


I’m just shocked rn… i’m 24… this guy told me he was 27. He just admitted that he’s 33. what? I’m not a fucking 18 year old, i’m 24. and he still lied about his age. It’s not an age gap at all, but i’m just shocked. He’s a bit weird too. I think i’m going to “end things”. He said that he lied about his age because “old people” like him get rejected a lot due to their age. What? if he lied about his age, he can lie about anything else I’m pretty upset right now, not going to lie. whatever though. I feel like ghosting him. he even said, “don’t hate me, please” such bullshit… EDIT: but should i just ghost him, block him and move on, or just say goodbye to him? 2nd edit: Damn, this blew up. i ghosted him, but I might send him a goodbye message tomorrow or the next day. I’m just upset, because I really like the way he was/is. Except for the fact that he’d want to talk about sex mostly all the time and would ask for nudes often. 🤦♀ “i can’t wait to fuck you” “i’m going to destroy your pussy” “i want to have you with me already” “once i have enough money, i’ll fly out to see you” “Even if we don’t connect i’ll still gladly live with you so we can be friends with benefits” he even had the audacity to say “since everything is going well between us, i must admit that I don’t want any lies between us. so the truth is, i lied to you about my age. i’m 33” 🤦♀

He’s probably not 33 either. If I were in your position, I'd send "Lying about your age is a deal breaker for me. We won't speak again" and block him


My GF and I have been together officially for a year and about 2 years unofficially. First, I have to admit my GF did say that she doesn't enjoy physical touch that much. For example we haven't kissed yet because she finds kissing 'disgusting and weird,' I've accepted it and I'm okay with that. We do have moments of physical touch but I initiate it only, like holding hands and fondling. Even so when we're hanging out at my house she doesn't sit close me We've talked about it and she says that she doesn't necessarily 'love' the physical touch but she's **okay** with it. Also, we're not very good at communicating. I find it very hard to talk to her about being more physically intimate For example when we talk about more personal things she changes the subject quickly. What should I do? Should I try to talk to her? Just tough it out? Or start thinking about the end of the relationship? Personally, I feel guilty about wanting more physical affection and that I shouldn't want it since she isn't keen on it. tldr: My GF isn't a very physically affectionate person and I'm not sure how to get more physical affection.

You want physical touch and affection, she doesn't. It sounds like you are incompatible and should probably think about ending the relationship. It sucks, but it doesn't sound like a fixable issue and it will almost definitely breed resentment between the two of you if it hasn't already. Try and be more open about your needs if you haven't properly expressed them already but don't expect her to suddenly change her preferences just because you're being more open. At the end of the day, you both deserve someone who wants the same level of affection. 'Toughing it out' is not a characteristic of a good, happy relationship. I suggest that you better talk with her seriously first, maybe she just this type of a person who don't like being physical but maybe it's something more deep, idk But conversation it's always a good start and after you can think if there something you together can do to make it feel more comfortable for you and her, or rather it's will be better to end the relationship


Hello! I have a question, after ending a long relationship I’ve been trying for a year to find someone to go out with but I think my personality is not attractive, and it even bothers some people. At parties I tend to be more of a clown, people usually laugh at me as much as with me, I am somewhat hyperactive, I involve screams, etc., in everyday life I am not usually like that because I keep myself more busy and focused, but in my free time with friends yes, and I don’t know if the right thing is to suppress that type of attitude or I should continue looking as I am... I read u PS: if this is not the indicated subreddit, I would appreciate it if you redirected me

Every person is different, and they’re going to prefer something different in a man’s personality. You shouldn’t have to suppress who you are to find someone who loves you. They should enjoy you as you are. Wait for someone who does. BUT, also ask people you know and trust if anything you do is considered off-putting. You can always work on social behaviors that people consider inappropriate. If they tell you that you’re good, then don’t worry about it. If they tell you something that you should change, then change it! A funny man is important, but also try to balance your conversations with light and deep topics. I don’t know if you are looking for a traditional girl, but being a gentleman is generally appreciated by women. Also, dress appropriately for your dates. Good luck


Cringe things men put on their dating profiles. Also, what would you rather see on their profiles?

“No drama” These guys on ig have a funny, scary accurate series, “Guys on Dating Apps be like” that really captures the full cringe of men thinking they’re being witty or unique when they’re really unwittingly showcasing themselves to be empty tropes


Why does growing intellectually advance you away from being attracted to the once simple pleasures. Find it as i have to get what likes me and not the golden ticket.

wut? I don’t think you are as smart as you think you are.


I 29F am pregnant and have been only dating my fiance 34M for a year. We are getting married and things are going good . Due to some bad history I avoided dating and he was my first. The guy is an airline pilot and gone for 17 days a month, which is fine for my avoidant attachment style. He is good looking, smart and gets along with my family. Yet at a family event recently he got sooo drunk, he actually arrived dizzy, and told my cousin some very unkind things about his girlfriend. He called her a sl*t and warned him that her fat a will get even fatter after she delivers a baby. Then he said that "his woman has only been with him and even after she gives him a buunch of kids will not look old or gain weight". Now, his woman is me. I found the wording very mean. And also to give him kids. Like a kid is something a wife give to her man? I don't know what to think about all his. He was soo drunk that he spent the night on all fours vomiting in the toilet. My cousin put him in the car and took him to my place. And now some memories come to my mind. I am fit as I hit the gym daily. But during winter I gain a bit of a weight. He was not mean or anything but bought me some jeans that were small, to motivate me lose weight. He said it was a joke but not sure. Also, I am an elementary school teacher and I thought about changing the career for an office job. He wasn't against it but he said elementary school teacher is very nice for a woman.

Are you sure your fiancé is a man and not just a bunch of red flags stuffed into a trenchcoat?? Is this the kind of man you want raising your children? Are these the views you want your future kids to have? I had a talk with him again, at breakfast. I told him for me it was a big deal what he said and I don't accept to NOT talk about it. I was pretty firm I would say. He acted surprised. I noticed how he stopped his fork near his mouth without putting the food in. But he was open and asked what exactly I want to know. I asked if he thinks women are inferior to men in any way or that our weight is an indicator of our value. I also said I will gain weight during pregnancy. And maybe a lot. He said he doesn't think women are inferior to men, that he was talking about my cousin's girlfriend, not women in generally. But that he will be honest with me and yes, he wouldn't marry a woman who has a big body count, but added that he doesn't look down upon women who have a high body count, it's just his own preference. He said a lot of women wouldn't date a man who has a low income job or any other criteria. And it's fine. Each to their own. He wouldn't mind marrying a woman who wasn't a virgin, but if she had more than 2, 3 guys up to her 30, then he has a big problem with that and he wouldn't seriously date her. And about the weight he said he doesn't mind that I gain weight during pregnancy, that he was talking about women who stay overweight long after giving birth and use the childbirth as an excuse. I should have felt relieved but I didn't and asked him what if I don't lose the extra weight. He said I will, to not worry about it. But LOL I wasn't worrying about it, I was worried about his view on me. And I confronted him further asking if he will cheat on me if I don't lose weight. He again said I will lose it, it's not a big deal. So I asked him directly: would you, would you cheat on me? He said no


As the title suggests, I can’t get over a guy I dated over a year ago. We were in a “situationship” for 4 months so he was never even officially my boyfriend. Physically, he was everything I was looking for. I was a tan, short, bodybuilding, blonde . He was a 6’4 blue-eyed Italian with luscious locks. I think I was completely infatuated from the start because I told him I loved him after a month of knowing him. I kept imaging what it was going to be like when he finally asked me to be his. I made up our entire life story together and fantasized about all day long. I started getting annoyed that he wasn’t asking to be official and it drove me crazy. I started questioning him and begging for reassurance that he was into me. I asked what I needed to change to be with him Side note, he was addicted to c**e and op******. I completely dismissed that as an issue because I was so obsessed with him. Obviously, things ended horribly. It’s been over a year and I still think about him every day. I try to date, but I always compare people to him . I need help. Has anyone been through this? Do you have any advice on how I can get over this and actually find someone?

Take a break from dating and focus your attention on something else like a new hobby, new physical activity etc. Try making new friends. Not romantic ones, just friends. If you always think about him, start thinking of negative traits that you saw in him and you'll eventually stop thinking about him at all. The real problem you have is u are looking for a copy of him, That's not gonna happen. You have put him on a pedestal; he was on drugs n overlooked it so who knows what else u over looked also him ticking all your "list" boxes doesn't help now your list has a face. Proposed solutions: stop using a list as ur Ex is now the list. Start from scratch the only requirements should be you are attracted to them and they are easy to date, kind etc. Eventually real love will win over your infatuation


I met someone last fall and we went out a couple of times. Both went great, we had lots in common and connected on multiple levels. We kept texting back and forth throughout the winter. I noticed that she would be very responsive and initiating things one moment and then suddenly would go quiet for a while. We set up another date and then she ended up cancelling at the last minute. After that, I told her I was interested in her but it seemed like she had lost interest, so I was going to move on. She said that she was in a ten year relationship which ended around 4-5 months before I met her. She had mentioned a past relationship during our second date, but I didn’t realize how long it was or how recent it ended and didn’t want to pry into the details at the time. She apologized for not being more upfront about it and said that she thinks I’m nice and interesting guy but she realized she’s not ready to date anyone at the moment. I told her I understand and asked if she wanted to go for a casual walk sometime not as a date. We ended up doing that and she thanked me for being understanding of her situation and said that we’d have to get to know each other as friends for now. I realize that there is no standard timeline for recovering from a breakup… and even though she’s said she’s interested in me, it’s hard for me to trust it with all the emotions I’ve experienced since I met her. I’ve tried to go on dates with other women, but I’ve been distracted because I’m thinking about her instead of the woman I’m on the date with. I feel very stuck at the moment. I’m not sure if I should keep talking to her and inviting her out to do things casually or just move on… hence the Reddit post. Any recommendations?

Move. On. You would be foolish to think that you’ll be the one to help her get over her 10+ year relationship. Move on to someone who is ready to date.


Been talking to a guy for a couple weeks and have plans to meet, we share some kinky tendencies. He recently asked if he could say something creepy and I said try me! He said he’d like to make out/grab the ass of 18 year old me. I’m 40f and he’s 41m. I didn’t know how to respond and now I’m definitely creeped out. Would this be a deal breaker for you if a guy said it to you?

I mean....yea did say try me!🤣 The guy said he would like to have seen you in your prime. He could’ve used a better age. But it’s not the worst thing he could’ve said.


Basically the title. We had a long talk last night and one of the things he brought up was that he’s slightly less attracted to me now because I’ve gained weight. He referenced a picture he sent me a week ago and said my face looked different now . When we met I think I was around 115-120 pounds. But now I’m about 135 pounds at 5’3”. I feel conflicted because I have a history of disordered eating and I know I’ve gained weight. I can see it and feel it in my clothes. But yet, I’m happy or the very least accepting of my body and glad with how my life is. And I told him this. I also listed other benefits of my weight gain: I’m no longer as cold even during the summer, my hands and feet aren’t cold all the time either, I have a little shape to my body now too. I understand that attraction isn’t something someone can control. My boyfriend treats me great otherwise. He didn’t tell me this begrudgingly but he brought it up in a kind way. But I don’t know how we can navigate this. I told him that I’m not at an unhealthy weight, I think I’m finally not underweight for my height. I’ve had a stressful last three years, and it’s going to be more stressful soon because my mother will be going through chemo . I know I could tone up to look better but honestly it’s not my priority at the moment. I’m surprised that I’m not totally heartbroken by his confession. Instead, I see him slightly different now because my weight gain cause this change in him and that worries me more. I want to have more follow-up conversations but what do I say? How do I spearhead that conversation so our relationship won’t crumble from this?

I get what you’re saying but I would never feel safe with someone this shallow. If a little weight gain can make him less attracted then what about pregnancy, illness, ageing etc? That would be my concern. I also had disordered eating and Im also 5’3. I’m now just under 150 lbs and used to be 140. I look after my diet well and I exercise but I would never actively pursue weight loss again. Only health. He’s 31 and behaving like this about you gaining weight even though you’re still in the healthy range for your size is making you less attractive to him? No leave now. You have to put yourself first especially with your history of disordered eating. As other commenters pointed out, what will he be like if you ever get pregnant?


Been dating this guy for six months and we had no problems between us. We had been doing long distance but I used to go visit him but he never took me to where he stayed.we always met in town .we had met a few days ago and there was nothing to warn me so I would say the day was good .the next day some girl calls me and warns me to stay away from this guy and I was so confused. She insulted me and I was too mortified to talk so I just hang up on her. She texts me and all of it was just insults and I was angry so insulted her back. I called the guy the next day and he just said that what the girl said was true .I didn't even cry I just laughed because how much of a coward was he that he couldn't tell me we were over . He texts me and says she is everything he ever prayed for and I didn't know what to say. I felt bad for a couple of days and talked to some friends and I was over him but now I am scared of ever dating again because I don't want to get hurt.. please advice.. And I still think about this guy sometimes but I don't miss him I just feel a pit in my stomach because I couldn't see the red flags

This... was horrible and I'm sorry it knocked you down, but you CAN'T stay down. You have to get back up, collect yourself, and back out there. Because while it's true that the bar is in hell, there are good men out there. Most of us don't want to end up without a relationship and HE isn't worth being your last guy let alone the one that scared you off forever. That girl didn't inherit your man. She inherited your problem. Better it be done now than after 7 years or something insane like that. > he never took me to where he stayed He may have been your boyfriend. But you were never his girlfriend.


im trying to find my man’s Reddit. I see from afar that he is always on it. Never thought anything of it, but he always has this look on his face that makes him look suspicious. And tonight I seen him on it again. So I’m trying to find him but I’ve got no idea how I can search him up. Yea, I can ask him, but I just know that my simple questions can easily turn into arguments because he can’t ever simply answer and reassure me. So I want to look him up on my own. But it’s hard on here because his name, nor any other names show up 😩😩.

Look very closely, become a fly on the wall. This is stemming from distrust, but sometimes when someone is secret about things it makes sense to not trust them. I hope you're able to find him. Or talk to him about it 🤣🤣 It’s me babe


I 49/F was asked by a friend 32/F to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. I was actually her boss for a few years and we developed a close friendship that has continued for many years along with some mutual friends. She looks up to me and I love her to death. I reluctantly agreed to be in her wedding which is 9 months away. There are 10 bridesmaids. The talk of the bachelorette weekend is happening and I truly don’t want to go. They are all significantly younger than I am, I’m quite introverted so staying in an Airbnb with 10 girls does not sound fun and the maid of honor who is planing is is a very high maintenance control freak so I’m already envisioning how this is going to go. I don’t think my friend would be upset if I didn’t go but I also don’t want to disappoint her. Should I just suck it up and go or should I regretfully decline?

She has plenty of time to find someone else with 9 months notice. Plus, 10 bridesmaids is ludicrous. I would suggest you graciously bow out from these activities and let her know that you believe this is best left to the younger members of the wedding party, and that you simply aren’t comfortable with these activities at your age. Tell her you absolutely want her to have a great time, but you will not be joining in. Honesty as soon as possible is the best policy. You should go. This is her wedding and she wants you to be a part of it because you're her friend.


So I met the girl online and I know thay have a thing for me and I've been iffy on how I show affection twords them and I thought I could like them back but no matter how much I try I just don't feel any emotional connection with them what do I do cuz their a good person and I've tried to like them back

If you don't feel any emotional connection at all, then you should just tell the person that you don't think they are the right person for you without going into a lot of detail. Yes, it'll hurt them regardless of what you say, but better to end it decently than keeping someone on a string since it isn't going anywhere and they'll get over you and move on in a short time so don't hold back letting them know. You'll do both of you a favor by admitting the truth about how you feel. Hey, so this just isnt clicking


Hi everybody. Sorry for the vague title, but I'm not really sure how to word this. Basically, my partner always emphasizes very idealistic things that he'll do for me in the future/one day and uses that as leverage. For example, my partner always says things like "I'll buy you nice jewelry one day" or "I'll take you on a nice vacation one day." I'm not sure if he thinks that'll make me feel more excited/hopeful for the future, but it actually just makes me feel worse. In regard to the statements that he'll buy me something, I've never been much of a gift person, but because he makes those statements, I sometimes come to expect something and then become disappointed. Just recently he went on a trip, and he told me he would buy me some nice tea. Without him telling me prior, I would have never expected a gift, but of course, he didn't actually end up following through. I'm just so confused because why tell me something that I necessarily don't want to hear???? by telling me, I feel like he's just setting himself up for more failure and me for unnecessary disappointment?? this is a common pattern that has happened multiple times across a variety of themes. While I feel like all his statements are super empty, he often acts as if they're not. For example, we got into a bit of a scuffle the other day, and I said something that complained about how he never thinks of "us" and it's always just "him." In response, he retorted that he will move to my home country for me, something that i think is highly unlikely but he likes to daydream about i guess, so that's proof that he is thinking about "us" and willing to do things for "us." Additionally, even if we do move, that's like ten years away minimum, aka maybe too far away to be bringing up in arguments right now. I also feel that he's expecting that everything will just work out in the long run so he doesn't have any urgency to apply meaningful thought or real tangible effort to our relationship in the present, which makes me feel like he just expects that I'll stay with him no matter what because he has painted this idealistic future for us . To be fair to him, I think he is only daydreaming about the future because he's going through a difficult time with his immediate family. but I'm wondering if 1. my feelings are valid, and that it makes sense to be frustrated at this sort of pattern, and if it does make sense, 2. how to go about communicating this to him in a way that's not an attack/harsh? and 3. how do I express that I would much rather appreciate some sort of effort in the present than to wait for a future that may never come?

Do you realistically see a future with him? How would that work with a different country? At 24, you need to get more serious about your dating options. You need to date with a future and you are seeing and knowing this behaviour, and life obstacles won’t lead to it. By saying he’ll do something for you “in the future” he’s gaining your positive reaction with ZERO cost or effort. He has no intention of ever doing any of the things he says. He couldn’t be assed to buy you tea? That was a no brainer, lowest effort possible option of something he actually could deliver. I’m sure if you really sit down and think about it, you’ll find other equally effortless promises that he didn’t make happen. He’s just stringing you along.


I have never had a girlfriend, am a virgin, and have only ever really been on a few dates in high school. I want to try and put myself out there but really don’t know how. I’ve tried a dating app but half the time I don’t get responses. I feel as if I am decent looking and I am fit. I also have job stability being in the reserves and goals as I am a college student trying to become an officer. I don’t have any debt and I feel as if I am in a good financial state. This might sound vague but what’s the best advice for trying to get started with dating as a young 20 year old?

Not sure that alot of my peers consider the reserves as stable career prospects, but the fact your a student with a goal for some type of OCS or OTS is a good long term goal. Just be yourself, open to meeting people and making friendly. If you like someone, communicate that to them sooner rather than later and don't be afraid of the rejection. It just means it wasn't the right person or the right time. Also keep in mind many have opinions on the military that they may consider that a deal breaker. Try not to take that too personally or be offended of that's their reason for not wanting to date. I started dating through social media platforms. Some time ago, I participated in a private test of a social software called LightUp: Make Real Friends . It matches you with people who share your interests based on your posts and helps you connect. By sharing my daily life on the platform, such as the scenery outside the door, travel places and other content, many interested netizens have interacted with me. We discussed the interesting things in our lives, and I also arranged to meet offline with a few friends I could chat with. My offline dates with these friends have gone very well because of my online chat base.


I just randomly found a bra I don’t recognise under mine and my partner of 10 years bed and am freaking out and don’t know how to proceed. Part of the problem is there’s a number of possibilities besides the obvious it could be. 1. It might be an old bra that i had forgotten i had. It does seem to fit me but I have no memory of it at all and it’s not really my style. 2. We had someone house sit for us a while ago and I think his girlfriend stayed over for a bit, so it could be hers. My partner is away until tomorrow. How do I confront him and figure out what’s going on?

Ask the friend if his girlfriend is missing a bra. If it's a good one, she will want it back. If it's not hers, then ...? House sitter seems plausible. Investigate that first.


She’s also 28, I’ve known her since high school too but only started talking to her again two years ago, and only actually began seeing her in person this year. As for why I’m a virgin, my life went to absolute fucking shit when I was 20. I was in and out mental hospitals for years and I only just finished an associates degree last year. I make 33 per hour which isn’t awful. I’m a hard worker who doesn’t take corporate bullshitting though, so I got promoted fast. This woman was my last loyal friend through these years. Everyone else who wasn’t a family member kind of treated me like a damaged piece of equipment in the friend group . I got new friends eventually, thank God. One more thing, if we had to judge her appearance, she is a straight up 10/10. I’m not the only guy who thinks so, I’ve had other guys who asked to see her picture confirm it. I’m worried I won’t have a shot if I’m a virgin but I really do like her and how loyal she’s been since literally 2012. Help me decide here.

I'd be fascinated to hear your plan to change that if you didn't. I’ll be honest with you, she might just view you as a friend and not as a potential lover but I’ll say this. If you have the balls to man up and let her know that you find her attractive and that you want to be more than her friend then tell her before someone else tries to be her man.


Before suggesting breaking up, hear me out. I’ve been in this relationship for a couple of years and it is truly making me lose myself. I care too much, admittedly sometimes about very small and stupid things. We will fight about these small things constantly. I also care too much about seeing him whenever I can because we are long distance. I want to live for myself and not for this relationship as I feel like I’ve grown to be very codependent on him when he just prefers to be alone. I do have a few hobbies but I will still pick him over everything. I want to stop caring and stop chasing someone who is running away from me. So how do I start caring less about someone I love more than anything while having the complete intention of staying with them.

Do you have girlfriends? Set times to hang out with them and try to stay off your phone / create space between you and your BF. Another way to do that is by doing your hobbies. Remind yourself you need independence. It makes you a better, more interesting partner. And, if things go south, it leaves you with a community to lean back on. You’re young and love feels soooo intense so don’t beat yourself up- it’s normal to be a bit obsessive at your age. Stop arguing over small things. if you are arguing & are long distance this is a problem. You can care for someone, doesn’t mean you have to be in a relationship. Start doing your things, you are the one choosing to not do them.


if you was asked by your boyfriend/ partner if you think they have a small penis would you say yes if you agreed or disagree not to hurt there feelings ?

Relevant bias, I'm a man who thinks the question is absurd. My first impulse is to say something like "Subjectively, I can tell you that I'm satisfied. If you care about size itself, please clean the ruler when you're done" You’re asking for trouble if it is small and you answer honestly. I’d answer something along the lines of, ‘I’ve never really thought about it, it’s okay for me’.


I am a 30F and I’ve been talking to a 25M for the past two months. We’ve been on 7 or 8 dates and they have all been going so well. Last night we went out to dinner and I slept at his place, like I have done many times before. We are extremely sexual and I have mentioned that I enjoy being choked during sex. He’s done it before and I’ve enjoyed it! This morning, we’re having a conversation in bed and are not in any position to start being intimate. The conversation was harmless but we started to debate a topic. After I said my side, he wrapped his hands around my throat for a few seconds. It didn’t necessarily hurt, but I was honestly shocked afterwards. I said he could choke me during sex and this was completely out of the blue….I brought it up later and said it really really concerned me. He apologized and said he would never hurt me and he didn’t mean it like that…should I give him another chance or run?

That's a run moment. Leading up... * Okay, she talked about sex choking, she's into it. * He did it before during sex and she liked it. I was expecting this to be a situation where he just went for it during sex but did it with without warning this time. That's just a boundary readjustment. But nah.. To choke someone during a debate. That's a huge F no. What happens during sex is irrelevant. To choke someone out of frustration that is statistically the most dangerous. You need to leave him. When it comes to choking in bed there need to be rules/boundaries for safety sake, and he obviously does not respect that. It's not something he should be doing out of irritation or anger, and if he is, it's a HUGE red flag. Do not trust this man with your life anymore.


Me and my now ex have had a very complicated relationship. He has always been emotionally abusive in arguments and when we are not arguing he makes small digs at me that slowly eat away at my self confidence. When we argue he calls me things like a “failure” “weak” he will bring up all of my short comings and anything i’ve ever told him out of vulnerability. Recently we had a terrible fight and he said more horrible things to me and i got to angry i grabbed him by his face and I put my hands on him. He has also put his hands on me in some occasions which he says is not comparable to when i’ve find it because he did not leave me bruised and he felt remorse. I feel so terrible and now we are over. He is calling me an abuser and says we can never be together but i feel this is not fair. I do not feel justified in hitting him but i feel i was pushed to my limit. I hit him and had a panic attack and shortly admitted myself into the psych ward i have never felt such intense anger. I fear i have snapped and there is no going back.

No its reactive abuse. He is trying to break you down so you react negatively and then use that to portray you as the bad person so you feel guilty. There is two things either he wanted out and tried to make it your fault to hide his wrong doings. Or he is manipulative, trying to make be tied to him by abandoning you. Let him go he will make your life hell. You had a toxic relationship. He was verbally abusive. He was the initial abuser. You need to cut him out of your life 100%. No decent man is ever going to verbally abuse you.


For context, my boyfriend isn't in any kind of secret relationship with her. She's dating his close friend, and lives in a different state than us. The reason I have an issue with him following her to begin with is she was being mildly flirty with him one night via a discord chat . I'm not okay with that, so I shut it down and told him it made me uncomfortable. So, I noticed he recently started following her on Instagram, but that isn't the part that bugged me. What bugged me is he went back and liked every single one of her posts all the way back to 2018. He didn't comment, but he liked them. Point is, why? So, the first time I told him I wasn't comfortable with that, resulting in him blocking her. Eventually he unblocked her and followed her again . This time I unfollowed her for him, only for him to refollow her again months later. We've been together 10 years and he has a history of purposefully doing things I don't like . Is this one of those moments? Or is there something else going on? I've checked his messages and he's not physically speaking to her, so what gives?

Girl, why are you with a man who *purposefully* does things he knows hurts you?? The issue here is you. You’re the one staying with someone who disrespects you and doesn’t care how you feel. You need to wake up and realize his behavior isn’t going to change and this is never going to stop. This man won’t even stop following a girl for you, instead he goes back years and likes all of her pictures. Please realize you deserve better than this. A man who loves you isn’t going to try to hurt you and upset you. He isn’t going to try to embarrass you by going back 5+ years on a girls instagram liking all of her pictures . The right person for you is going to shut down flirty conversation without you even having to say anything. Relationships are not supposed to hurt you like this, I promise there is so much better out there. Regardless of if he’s inappropriately talking to her or just trying to upset you, both are horrible and say a lot about his character. i'll be honest... i'm a girl gamer and i befriended a few guys along the way. some single and some with girlfriends. i am hit on 99% of the time by the guys with girlfriends. and i even ended up talking to one of the guys who lived in another country who told me they broke up because she cheated on him, come to find out he lied and they were together the whole time and he had no remorse when i found out. please please just talk to him about it. i dont want to make assumptions but its very weird he's went and liked all her photos and he's not listening to the boundaries you set and this is just giving me flashbacks of what i went through being on the other side. it's easier to get away with emotional cheating than physical cheating. some men find it more fun to flirt with girls they will never see because they will never be there to confront him


I've been with this girl for about a month. She kissed another man and said it was a dare that she had to do. She then added that its not okay if i did the same, and that if I did she would be really mad at me and she would do something. This double standard is making me wonder whether this relationship is worth it in the long run. What should I do? Should I step out early or stay?

Break up. Double standard, my ass. >said it was a dare that she had to do. She's not mature enough to be in a relationship yet, nevermind the cheating or double standard.


So me and my bf had a great sex life in the beginning. Usually once a day and he was enjoying it a lot, initiating it the majority of the time. I already had some problems with being rejected back then so I felt really overwhelmed when he sometimes wasn’t that much in the mood. However, that was controllable. Now 2 years into the relationship, he seems to just don‘t want me sexually anymore. His libido got really low half a year ago but we thought it was because of his semester abroad. Now he‘s been back for over 2 months but nothing’s changed. He seems to be less interested in me everyday. I also try everything, putting on sexy clothes, wearing makeup, doing my hair, doing sexy stuff to get him in the mood. But even when it works he seems to not enjoy it as much as he used to. He doesn’t touch me in „awe“ anymore and seems to not be in love with me and my body anymore. He denies that this is the case everytime I try to talk about it but still nothing’s changing. So now I‘m thinking if I‘m just overdramatizing it? And just wanted to ask if anybody else had similar situations and how you cope with the extreme feelings of rejection.

Yea know...life happens and we all get kinda tired. First..communication is key. Get on the same page. Second...mix it up. There was something so incredibly erotic that out of the blue.....the wife of 20+ years was legs spread masterbateing as i exited the shower. We locked eyes. I got insta hard and we did a mutual masterbateing session. We both came so damn quick watching each other masterbateing. Perhaps he’s cheating on you


I’m in a long distance relationship for 4 years with my boyfriend. For a year I’m trying to plan to visit him but things keep getting in the way. I’m renting an apartment and a few months ago during a storm something happened to the balconies that couldn’t wait so I’m in the middle of a renovation in my house right now as we speak and I can’t leave. However in the meantime my boyfriend keeps pushing me to come and is setting dates and barely takes no for an answer. We had many arguments about this and I’m always being accused of being a liar despite us video calling and him witnessing all the problems at my apartment. Occasionally he has even broken up with me a few times saying he doesn’t want to wait, but always comes back to me anyway. This adds stress to the situation, and in the meantime I started to have health issues… thinking it was just from the stress I went to the doctor and they did bloodwork and it came back not good. Worst case scenario, I possibly may have cancer and I’m waiting for the hospital to contact me. I’m very scared. When I tell him I feel unsupported and all he cares about is what he wants he says it’s not like he doesn’t care, he just thinks I don’t have it because god wouldn’t do that to us. All day every hour he makes comments saying “that’s why you should come here, I wish you’d come here, when are you buying your tickets, you should really be here, buy tickets” and it’s so draining. Like he doesn’t understand that I’m waiting for a appointment in the hospital and that’s priority right now. It makes me feel so alone, unsupported and not seen. I don’t want to keep defending myself and talk about it all the time and keep explaining myself. What can I do?

Suggest he visits you instead. if he wants to see you that bad then he could take it upon himself to buy tickets to see you!!! you are obviously having a lot of difficulties at the moment and he could just think to himself 'maybe it would cheer her up if I visited her and helped her? ' I can say this as me and my partner are semi long distance, he is in a bad financial state and is waiting to start his new job, so for the last year I have driven every. single. weekend. to go see him because I understand his situation, and he does as well, saying that he will pay me back for everything so comparing our situations, it sounds like your partner is either 1. lazy and doesn't wanna get off his arse to come see you. or 2. doesn't care enough or see a long term possibility for your relationship, and therefore you are best getting out because it seems as if he doesn't wanna put in the effort for you, on top of you needing extra support right now he doesn't wanna give you the bare minimum. I hope everything with your health gets better and I wish you the best


Hey guys, so I'm in need of your experiences. There's this one girl in my life... She makes me think about her all the time, getting lost in her eyes or just fall in love with her laugh on a regular base. We have a good friendship together. But, atleast from my side, I feel and want more than just being in a friendship with her. There's this fear of what happens if I express my feelings to her - what if she says no? I can't think of how much the loss of this friendship will hurt me. Did some of you have the same problem? and how did you handle it? Also excuse my english, thanks:)

You have to be willing to lose it all to gain it all. Sure, she may say no, but would you rather live life knowing you never even gave it a chance while she continues to date other men who will not be you? Try and you may fail. Don’t try and you guaranteed your own failure. And given enough years, the thing will hurt you most is the regret of things you left undone and things left unsaid. Even you tried and something, made mistakes, whatever… you’ll look back being glad you have some silly war stories. Who knows, maybe many years from now, you tell a bedtime story to your daughter about the friendship you had with her mother, and the fear you had at this very moment about expressing your feelings… and maybe a story about getting rejected several times before she agrees and say yes… whatever it is, it will be beautiful bedtime stories.


I recently ghosted a guy online because he didn’t look how I imagined him to be, and I feel worried saying this. What do yall think?

You should just tell him. Sure, no one wants to hear that but it's better than ghosting IMO. like you could simply say "hey, sorry but I just don't think this is going to work in the long run. You're a cool guy but physically, you're not what I'm looking for." good luck Ghosting is a shitty thing to do. If you're going to date, act like an adult and communicate. That being said, not liking the way someone looks is a valid reason to stop seeing them.


I am sorry ahead for some mistakes, English is not my first language. I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 years. Over the past year, he has made 2 new female friends at his school. They would hang out after class and go for a lunch together and all four of them would also go out for drinks. Last week one of the girls wrote him and they spent half a day hanging out together and are planning a next meeting in July. . Despite this, I admit I am feeling jealous and it is putting a strain on our relationship . I suggested to him that I would like to meet them, as I know it would ease my problem once I get to know them . He was very hesitant, stating: 1. He doesn't know how to introduce me so it doesn't look forceful and awkward 2. He doesn't view them as close friends/best friends yet, so he doesn't consider it necessary to introduce me. Beside this issue, BF is very open and honest about everything and his friends know about me. I would like to know your opinion on this situation, whether I am just overly jealous or I am in the right to feel unhappy about his stance on this matter.

I get where both of you are coming from, him drawing a boundary with school connections is reasonable. I think a fair compromise is that next time the group has drinks, you can drop in for a drink at some point, that allows him to introduce you in a casual way and leave together. That isn't overly intrusive, but it does let you see who he is hanging out with and also shows the group he is dating. >Last week one of the girls wrote him and they spent half a day hanging out together So they went on a date? >They would hang out after class and go for a lunch together and all four of them would also go out for drinks. >He doesn't know how to introduce me so it doesn't look forceful and awkward This is how you learn that your boyfriend doesn't also think of you as a friend. If he's hanging out with these two girls there is nothing forced or awkward about him inviting his girlfriend to join. just like he can invite his male friend to join. Unless it's a double date, then of course, you would be in the way. But my advice is don't try and change his mind because he's already decided and you would be wasting your breath. Instead respect how unhappy the situation is making you and decide what you want to do about it. Like for example you could say "I'm really unhappy in this situation where you've made these friends that you can hang out with all day, that you are comfortable bringing your male friend along to meet but when I want to meet them it's forced and you can't figure out how to make that happen. It's just too complicated a situation. It's only complicated if there are romantic feelings between you and one of those girls. But I'm not going to try and change your mind. Because I don't want to date a guy who can't figure out how to include me in his life and friendships. Especially after 3 years together. There are obviously things you are trying to explore so you should be free to do that so that I don't have to sit here and feel like my boyfriend is cheating on me." And that is how you free yourself of this whole situation. Give him back his shit and get yours from him and then you heal and move on to someone who has respect for you and behaves in a more trustworthy manner.


My fiance and I have been together for four years. When we first got together we had sex & did sexual activities all the time. We couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. Last October we got busy renovating our new home and working all the time that we weren’t as active. We moved in together in March of this year and I was so happy to get back to being a lot more active. Living alone you have all the time and freedom to do it WHENEVER WHEREVER. We never do tho. It’ll go 2-3 weeks without anything. No making out. No touching each other sexually. The only time we do is if he’s in the mood. I’m always in the mood. I crave it. I have tried everything. I buy lingerie. I walk around naked. I ask. I beg. I’ve talked about it to him countless times. Cried to him. I’m so lost on what to do? What is the problem? What else can I do? I’ve asked if there’s something else and he swears there’s not. I know where he is and he’s not one to go out. He likes to do everything with me. He’s not sneaky and im always able to check his phone if I ask but I have never ever felt the need to. This is so upsetting. I don’t want our relationship to be like this forever. I love sex and the closeness. No matter how much I say it upsets me he just says “sorry”. I need advice. Someone who can understand. Anything.

6 months ago you posted about spicing up your sex life, did you ever do that? If so, do you think maybe you went too far and it's turned him off? Get a new fiance.


Yesterday I had an amazing first date with a girl and I cannot stop thinking about her and the date. We were super affectionate, said amazing things to each other, had tons of fun. I’m honestly wanting to see her again so so bad. I’m assuming we will see each other for a 2nd date, but today she hasn’t text me for 8 hours and I’m getting tons of anxiety. I don’t know what to do with myself and i’m just anxious / sad staring at my phone waiting for a text. When monday hits I honestly plan on scheduling an appointment for therapy, I know this is probably not normal and I am either just extremely lonely or maybe something deeper. I guess I’m just wondering if anyone else tends to feel like this or experiences this :(, thank you everyone

1. Live a happy life 2. Get an abundance of dating options in your life If you have those two in place - you will feel less desperate. I know that's easier said than done, but any small improvement in these areas will help. I think this is normal I think what you're suffering from is a ridiculous culture that makes you deny your feelings and makes you pretend to be aloof when you really just want to scream your feelings from the rooftops I am with you friend, and I think your feelings are beautiful


This occurred a few months ago, but I've been thinking about it a lot. One night, while having sex with my boyfriend, we were in the missionary position with my legs on his shoulders, which allowed for fairly deep penetration, though not deep enough to cause pain at the time. Immediately after, I began to feel a light pain on one side of my abdomen. The pain worsened when I got home, and I couldn't sleep because it was so intense. The next morning, the pain was still present, but it had become sharp. I was worried I might have appendicitis or something similar. The pain became so severe that I nearly went to the hospital, but fortunately, it subsided after taking a few painkillers. What do you think might have happened? I Googled it and found that I might have ruptured an ovarian cyst, but I'm not sure. .

He was probably hitting it, too rough. But still wrong place to post this Why are you asking us? We're not doctors.