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| <title>SCENE II. OLIVIA's house. | |
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| <tr><td class="play" align="center">Twelfth Night | |
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| <a href="/Shakespeare">Shakespeare homepage</A> | |
| | <A href="/Shakespeare/twelfth_night/">Twelfth Night</A> | |
| | Act 3, Scene 2 | |
| <br> | |
| <a href="twelfth_night.3.1.html">Previous scene</A> | |
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| <H3>SCENE II. OLIVIA's house.</h3> | |
| <p><blockquote> | |
| <i>Enter SIR TOBY BELCH, SIR ANDREW, and FABIAN</i> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech1><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=1>No, faith, I'll not stay a jot longer.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech2><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=2>Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech3><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=3>You must needs yield your reason, Sir Andrew.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech4><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=4>Marry, I saw your niece do more favours to the</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=5>count's serving-man than ever she bestowed upon me;</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=6>I saw't i' the orchard.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech5><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=7>Did she see thee the while, old boy? tell me that.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech6><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=8>As plain as I see you now.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech7><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=9>This was a great argument of love in her toward you.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech8><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=10>'Slight, will you make an ass o' me?</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech9><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=11>I will prove it legitimate, sir, upon the oaths of</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=12>judgment and reason.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech10><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=13>And they have been grand-jury-men since before Noah</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=14>was a sailor.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech11><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=15>She did show favour to the youth in your sight only</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=16>to exasperate you, to awake your dormouse valour, to</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=17>put fire in your heart and brimstone in your liver.</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=18>You should then have accosted her; and with some</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=19>excellent jests, fire-new from the mint, you should</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=20>have banged the youth into dumbness. This was</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=21>looked for at your hand, and this was balked: the</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=22>double gilt of this opportunity you let time wash</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=23>off, and you are now sailed into the north of my</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=24>lady's opinion; where you will hang like an icicle</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=25>on a Dutchman's beard, unless you do redeem it by</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=26>some laudable attempt either of valour or policy.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech12><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=27>An't be any way, it must be with valour; for policy</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=28>I hate: I had as lief be a Brownist as a</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=29>politician.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech13><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=30>Why, then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=31>valour. Challenge me the count's youth to fight</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=32>with him; hurt him in eleven places: my niece shall</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=33>take note of it; and assure thyself, there is no</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=34>love-broker in the world can more prevail in man's</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=35>commendation with woman than report of valour.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech14><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=36>There is no way but this, Sir Andrew.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech15><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=37>Will either of you bear me a challenge to him?</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech16><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=38>Go, write it in a martial hand; be curst and brief;</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=39>it is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent and fun</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=40>of invention: taunt him with the licence of ink:</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=41>if thou thou'st him some thrice, it shall not be</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=42>amiss; and as many lies as will lie in thy sheet of</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=43>paper, although the sheet were big enough for the</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=44>bed of Ware in England, set 'em down: go, about it.</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=45>Let there be gall enough in thy ink, though thou</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=46>write with a goose-pen, no matter: about it.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech17><b>SIR ANDREW</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=47>Where shall I find you?</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech18><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=48>We'll call thee at the cubiculo: go.</A><br> | |
| <p><i>Exit SIR ANDREW</i></p> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech19><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=49>This is a dear manikin to you, Sir Toby.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech20><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=50>I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=51>strong, or so.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech21><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=52>We shall have a rare letter from him: but you'll</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=53>not deliver't?</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech22><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=54>Never trust me, then; and by all means stir on the</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=55>youth to an answer. I think oxen and wainropes</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=56>cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=57>opened, and you find so much blood in his liver as</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=58>will clog the foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=59>the anatomy.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech23><b>FABIAN</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=60>And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=61>great presage of cruelty.</A><br> | |
| <p><i>Enter MARIA</i></p> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech24><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=62>Look, where the youngest wren of nine comes.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech25><b>MARIA</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=63>If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourself</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=64>into stitches, follow me. Yond gull Malvolio is</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=65>turned heathen, a very renegado; for there is no</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=66>Christian, that means to be saved by believing</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=67>rightly, can ever believe such impossible passages</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=68>of grossness. He's in yellow stockings.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech26><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=69>And cross-gartered?</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech27><b>MARIA</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=70>Most villanously; like a pedant that keeps a school</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=71>i' the church. I have dogged him, like his</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=72>murderer. He does obey every point of the letter</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=73>that I dropped to betray him: he does smile his</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=74>face into more lines than is in the new map with the</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=75>augmentation of the Indies: you have not seen such</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=76>a thing as 'tis. I can hardly forbear hurling things</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=77>at him. I know my lady will strike him: if she do,</A><br> | |
| <A NAME=78>he'll smile and take't for a great favour.</A><br> | |
| </blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=speech28><b>SIR TOBY BELCH</b></a> | |
| <blockquote> | |
| <A NAME=79>Come, bring us, bring us where he is.</A><br> | |
| <p><i>Exeunt</i></p> | |
| </blockquote> | |
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| | <A href="/Shakespeare/twelfth_night/">Twelfth Night</A> | |
| | Act 3, Scene 2 | |
| <br> | |
| <a href="twelfth_night.3.1.html">Previous scene</A> | |
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