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https://www.theonion.com/news-van-driver-sick-of-helping-anchors-move-1819588676
news van driver sick of helping anchors move
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nasa-photo-earth-rise-over-moon-horizon_us_567574dce4b06fa6887d93a1
gorgeous new nasa image shows earth 'rising' over the moon
0
https://local.theonion.com/college-allowing-students-individual-commencement-speak-1819577807
college allowing students individual commencement speakers to make ceremony acceptable for all
1
https://local.theonion.com/34-year-old-asks-for-big-piece-1819579465
34-year-old asks for big piece
1
https://local.theonion.com/students-thankful-standardized-curriculum-sparing-them-1819576996
students thankful standardized curriculum sparing them from free-spirited teacher's antics
1
https://local.theonion.com/husband-calls-for-greater-restrictions-on-pier-one-impo-1819564700
husband calls for greater restrictions on pier one imports
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/transgender-inmates-to-be-held-with-preferred-gender_us_55f32015e4b042295e362e8a
transgender inmates to be integrated according to identity in san francisco
0
https://www.theonion.com/dutch-anti-defamation-league-closes-1819564148
dutch anti-defamation league closes
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mic-mac-mall-pet-patrols-canada_n_5589249.html
mall debuts pet patrols to save dogs trapped in hot cars
0
https://www.theonion.com/india-opens-new-mohandas-k-gandhi-nuclear-testing-faci-1819564737
india opens new mohandas k. gandhi nuclear-testing facility
1
https://local.theonion.com/prayers-answered-by-random-series-of-events-in-cold-un-1819571307
prayers answered by random series of events in cold, uncaring universe
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/huffpost-hill-america-nostalgic-for-bush-v-gore-somehow_us_58093734e4b02444efa27bdf
huffpost hill - america nostalgic for bush v. gore, somehow
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hawaii-kilauea-volcano_us_5b0264cfe4b0a046186d8725
hawaii residents face new hazard from erupting volcano: laze
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/a-couples-hilarious-exchange-went-viral-on-twitter_us_560acb13e4b0dd850309586e
couple's friendly twitter war shows solo sex is better than fifa
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/why-successful-ceos-must-leadership_b_6615522.html
why successful ceos must think like the janitor
0
https://www.theonion.com/poll-finds-majority-of-americans-approve-of-child-labor-1819579609
poll finds majority of americans approve of child labor laws but agree that kids carrying briefcases would be cute
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chuck-todd-imitates-yoda_us_567560d4e4b06fa6887d9287
chuck todd imitates yoda -- and it's actually pretty good
0
https://politics.theonion.com/trump-there-is-hatred-on-both-sides-of-my-heart-1819592903
trump: 'there is hatred on both sides of my heart'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chris-christie-drops-out-2016-race_us_560c3cbfe4b0768127006bc1
chris christie suspends his presidential campaign
0
https://www.theonion.com/desperate-starbucks-now-pleading-for-people-to-masturba-1826200909
desperate starbucks now pleading for people to masturbate, use drugs in its restrooms
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/secret-service-officer-sexting_us_56452708e4b045bf3dee88bf
secret service officer arrested in child sexting sting
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-unsure-how-to-expose-self-to-woman-he-likes-without-1823737166
man unsure how to expose self to woman he likes without coming off as a creep
1
https://politics.theonion.com/kushner-frantically-searching-desk-drawer-for-bold-solu-1819580271
kushner frantically searching desk drawer for bold solutions to today's most pressing issues
1
https://local.theonion.com/gazebo-underutilized-1819587373
gazebo underutilized
1
https://www.theonion.com/court-takes-custody-of-harley-from-unfit-motorcycle-mam-1819564998
court takes custody of harley from unfit motorcycle mama
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bel-biv-devoe-poison-90s-classic_us_588138dce4b096b4a230c463
how bell biv devoe ignored the 'backlash' and made 'poison' a '90s classic
0
https://www.theonion.com/man-commits-to-new-tv-show-just-hours-after-getting-out-1819577822
man commits to new tv show just hours after getting out of 7-season series
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/raul-labrador-nobody-dies-health-care_us_590de6aae4b0e7021e982003
gop congressman: 'nobody dies because they don't have access to health care'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/paula-abduls-back-at-it_b_5968922.html
paula abdul's back at it
0
https://www.theonion.com/helicopter-mating-season-begins-1819590306
helicopter mating season begins
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/four-incredible-new-advan_b_10594780.html
four incredible new advances in health technology
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/network-like-a-genius-top_b_6194612.html
network like a genius: insights from a world-class marketing guru
0
https://www.theonion.com/mta-reminds-new-yorkers-they-can-fucking-walk-1822734848
mta reminds new yorkers they can fucking walk
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/presidential-hopefuls-ham-it-up-at-iowa-state-fair_us_55d00b8ae4b0ab468d9d8a4a
presidential hopefuls ham it up at iowa state fair
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/heritage-muslim-benghazi_n_5559981.html
muslim woman berated at heritage event speaks out on independence day
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/dog-the-bounty-hunter-chris-christie_us_597f50f8e4b02a8434b80716
dog the bounty hunter joins lawsuit against chris christie over bail reform
0
https://local.theonion.com/creative-alcoholic-comes-up-with-idea-to-drink-a-lot-1819564258
creative alcoholic comes up with idea to drink a lot
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/isabella-santiago-transgender_n_6140880.html
look: transgender contestants compete for title of miss international queen
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/greeces-rock-portrait-gal_b_5354081.html
greece's rock portrait gallery, from craggy ogres to de gaulle's nose: suspended in mid-air on the looney front, part ii
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.washingtonpost.com/local/racial-turmoil-in-friendliest-town/2015/07/18/cf971950-2b7c-11e5-bd33-395c05608059_story.html?hpid=z1
racial turmoil in md.'s 'friendliest town' after black police chief is fired
0
https://politics.theonion.com/report-all-standing-between-trump-and-presidency-is-n-1819579024
​report: all standing between trump and presidency is nation that made him billionaire celebrity
1
https://local.theonion.com/area-man-treats-girlfriend-to-sumptuous-20-second-massa-1819575311
area man treats girlfriend to sumptuous 20-second massage
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/277853-fiorina-spotted-in-indiana-ahead-of-cruz-announcement
fiorina spotted in indiana ahead of cruz announcement
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/abandoned-cat-maternal-instincts-kittens_us_562fb439e4b00aa54a4b66de
abandoned cat uses 'maternal instincts' to find her missing kittens
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/explosive-illusions_b_6960576.html
explosive illusions
0
https://www.theonion.com/guy-on-roof-starting-to-think-he-might-get-away-with-it-1819591168
guy on roof starting to think he might get away with it
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/airplane-highway-landing-video_us_59707e53e4b062ea5f8f9fa9
'holy s**t!': airplane lands right in front of driver on ny highway
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sharing-recognition-in-a-_b_5175445.html
sharing recognition in a selfie era: #teamnocancer
0
https://local.theonion.com/cranky-businessman-quieted-for-entire-trip-with-brightl-1819591601
cranky businessman quieted for entire trip with brightly colored cell phone game
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/olympic-teammates-cant-chest-bump-to-save-their-life_us_57aaf1bae4b0db3be07c4fc4
let's celebrate this olympic chest bump fail
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/should-i-eat-it-a-dining-guide-for-toddlers-infographic_b_5942618.html
should i eat it? a dining guide for toddlers
0
https://www.theonion.com/area-man-asked-to-shoot-janice-an-e-mail-1819569470
area man asked to shoot janice an e-mail
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mike-huckabee-country-music-association_us_5a9a03ebe4b0a0ba4ad372d1
mike huckabee resigns from country music board after criticism of his anti-lgbtq views
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/penguins-win-stanley-cup_us_575e20bde4b00f97fba8b6b2
pittsburgh penguins defeat san jose sharks 3-1 to claim the stanley cup
0
https://politics.theonion.com/ruth-bader-ginsburg-debating-whether-to-cancel-winter-v-1819579515
ruth bader ginsburg debating whether to cancel winter vacation climbing k2
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/light-at-night-depression-suicide_n_5725638.html
the problem with getting too much light at night
0
https://www.theonion.com/hero-financial-officer-saves-12-grand-1819587444
hero financial officer saves 12 grand
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/dont-be-surprised-by-reti_b_5738792.html
don't be surprised by retiree healthcare costs
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/our-transgender-child_n_5877452.html
our transgender child
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/barack-obamas-emancipation-proclamation_us_58430cd3e4b0cf3f64558a50
barack obama's emancipation proclamation
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/barack-obama-is-fourth-pr_b_5783292.html
barack obama is fourth president to put americans at risk in iraq: let those threatened by the islamic state fight it
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-imani-boyettes-love-for-basketball-helped-her-overcome-depression_us_5745cacfe4b0dacf7ad391fd
how imani boyette's love for basketball helped her overcome depression
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-national-security-transition_us_5881ad86e4b070d8cad1d4f6
trump's national security transition is 'a mess," officials say
0
https://www.theonion.com/toddler-chokes-to-death-on-plastic-taiwanese-made-toy-1819570895
toddler chokes to death on plastic taiwanese-made toy
1
https://www.theonion.com/new-study-finds-humans-may-have-some-capacity-for-compa-1819573254
new study finds humans may have some capacity for compassion
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/medical-marijuana-research_us_559d5789e4b05b1d028f84c4
new proposal could make it easier to research medical benefits of marijuana
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bear-cubs-ride-mama-alaska-lake_us_5958112fe4b0da2c7323f6b8
adorable bear cubs hitch a ride on mom's back across an alaska lake
0
https://local.theonion.com/weird-looking-guy-somehow-manages-to-look-normal-in-fac-1819575308
weird-looking guy somehow manages to look normal in facebook profile picture
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/brooklyn-queer-performance-showcase-ritual-celebrates-two-yeats_us_564ca867e4b06037734bec2a
brooklyn queer performance showcase 'ritual' celebrates two year anniversary
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pretty-little-liars-ending-after-7-seasons_us_57c488f9e4b0cdfc5ac8a026
don't blame 'a' but 'pretty little liars' is ending after 7 seasons
0
https://www.theonion.com/editors-of-good-car-magazine-the-2013-hyundai-sonata-i-1819574152
editors of 'good car' magazine: 'the 2013 hyundai sonata is a good car'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ethics-mike-pence-colts_us_59dae96ce4b0f6eed3513fa9
ethics group blasts pence for using government travel for colts stunt
0
https://politics.theonion.com/three-escaping-legislators-shot-from-senate-guard-tower-1819589614
three escaping legislators shot from senate guard tower
1
https://politics.theonion.com/biden-regales-dnc-with-story-of-80s-girl-band-vixen-br-1819579074
biden regales dnc with story of '80s girl band vixen breaking hard rock's glass ceiling
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/michelle-obamas-daily-habit-is-all-about-happiness_us_5aabdb1fe4b05b2217fe4c21
michelle obama's daily habit is all about happiness
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/abortion-mandatory-waiting-period_us_576d80bce4b0dbb1bbba7edd
mandatory waiting periods are making abortions all but impossible
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/emanuel-african-methodist_n_7630652.html
charleston church holds first service since shootings
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/isis-muslim_n_5946340.html
isis' muslim death toll is enormous
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/iran-nuclear-deal_us_587b9931e4b09281d0eb61c8
iran says it will not renegotiate nuclear deal
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lets-go-home-the-power-of-redemption_b_7177556.html
'let's go home': the power of redemption
0
https://www.theonion.com/red-lobster-criticized-for-decimating-biscuit-populatio-1819716497
red lobster criticized for decimating biscuit populations along cheddar bay
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lorna-simpson-interview-salon-94_us_57eeb9cde4b082aad9bb375b
lorna simpson creates haunting meditations on the state of blackness in america
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/why-im-proud-of-that-belly_b_6117242.html
why i'm proud of 'that belly'
0
https://www.theonion.com/not-even-julian-assange-clear-on-whats-going-on-with-hi-1819573781
not even julian assange clear on what's going on with him right now
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-epa-scott-pruitt_us_584875c7e4b0f9723cfff87e
donald trump's epa pick is a leading foe of clean water laws
0
https://local.theonion.com/this-women-s-strike-won-t-accomplish-anything-report-1819579705
'this women's strike won't accomplish anything,' reports man who will boycott upcoming 'avengers' movie
1
https://www.theonion.com/air-wick-introduces-new-piss-scented-bathroom-diffuser-1825413969
air wick introduces new piss-scented bathroom diffuser
1
https://politics.theonion.com/hillary-clinton-campaign-shuts-down-after-blowing-throu-1819577792
hillary clinton campaign shuts down after blowing through $2 billion in first month
1
https://local.theonion.com/fight-kind-of-runs-out-of-steam-15-seconds-in-1819573199
fight kind of runs out of steam 15 seconds in
1
https://local.theonion.com/friend-group-completely-disintegrates-within-5-minutes-1819592202
friend group completely disintegrates within 5 minutes of graduation
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kim-jong-nam-suspect-ill_us_58afbf98e4b0a8a9b780e958
suspect in kim jong nam's murder also sickened by toxic nerve agent, police say
0
https://www.theonion.com/poll-68-of-americans-believe-lee-harvey-oswald-acted-1819885391
poll: 68% of americans believe lee harvey oswald acted like asshole
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ryan-bundy-nevada-governor_us_5aa2b709e4b07047bec608a3
states' rights rancher ryan bundy to run for nevada governor
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/determined-cat-play-stuffed-tiger_us_562e4e0ee4b0443bb56497dd
determined cat goes through a lot to wrestle with stuffed tiger
0
https://local.theonion.com/area-man-proud-he-can-still-fit-into-car-from-high-scho-1819573419
area man proud he can still fit into car from high school
1
https://www.theonion.com/pope-francis-grills-burgers-on-balcony-of-st-peter-s-b-1819592254
pope francis grills burgers on balcony of st. peter's basilica
1
https://local.theonion.com/gallant-man-extremely-concerned-about-drunk-womans-welf-1819570460
gallant man extremely concerned about drunk woman's welfare
1
https://www.theonion.com/duke-duchess-of-cambridge-announce-name-of-third-child-1825606672
duke, duchess of cambridge announce name of third child is louis arthur al-baghdadi
1
https://local.theonion.com/open-dialogue-two-americans-having-about-race-pretty-hi-1819575359
open dialogue two americans having about race pretty hilarious
1
https://sports.theonion.com/scuba-diver-expressing-either-joy-or-terror-1819568752
scuba diver expressing either joy or terror
1