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https://entertainment.theonion.com/apocalypto-star-wants-to-show-he-can-do-mayan-comedy-1819568871
apocalypto star wants to show he can do mayan comedy
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/depressed-matt-lauer-up-all-night-rewatching-8-second-c-1821054074
depressed matt lauer up all night rewatching 8-second clip of career highlights
1
https://www.theonion.com/man-throws-money-at-problem-1819590923
man throws money at problem
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/13-dead-from-unexplained-illness-in-liberia_us_590e2c2ae4b0104c734f7302
13 dead from unexplained illness in liberia
0
https://www.theonion.com/climatologists-say-humanity-s-best-hope-is-hurricanes-s-1819580400
climatologists say humanity's best hope is hurricanes spinning in different directions and canceling each other out
1
https://www.theonion.com/jenna-bushs-federally-protected-wetlands-now-open-for-p-1819587020
jenna bush's federally protected wetlands now open for public drilling
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/charles-koch-criminal-justice_n_6386884.html
charles koch wants to change america's criminal justice system
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chris-christies-strange-j_b_6583406.html
chris christie's strange justice
0
https://www.theonion.com/teens-eulogy-mostly-nickelback-lyrics-1819569264
teen's eulogy mostly nickelback lyrics
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gene-simmons-message-to-wannabe-rocker_us_57c92970e4b0a22de09582e3
gene simmons' message to wannabe rocker: 'get a damn job'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/karen-handel-suspicious-package_us_5942ed64e4b01eab7a2c7a5f
georgia congressional candidate receives threatening package
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/comic-book-fans-adamant-that-human-torch-be-played-by-a-1819577931
comic book fans adamant that human torch be played by actor whose body actually engulfed in flames
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/an-open-letter-to-the-republican-leadership_us_593dbae8e4b0b13f2c6b9bae
an open letter to the republican leadership
0
https://politics.theonion.com/mccain-courts-youth-vote-with-lengthy-speech-on-forbear-1819589075
mccain courts youth vote with lengthy speech on forbearance, morality
1
https://www.theonion.com/george-zimmerman-wins-florida-state-lottery-1819575244
george zimmerman wins florida state lottery
1
https://www.theonion.com/traveler-amazed-by-sheer-number-of-mexicans-1819567477
traveler amazed by sheer number of mexicans
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/my-hair-was-a-stranger-to-me_us_57c96ecce4b0b9c5b7381ef7
my hair was a stranger to me
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/women-make-less-men_us_564b742fe4b08cda348af830
please stop blaming women for making less money than men
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/old-hollywood-portraits-capture-stars-in-candid-moments-between-takes_us_58f4dcaae4b0b9e9848d4085
old hollywood portraits capture stars in candid moments between takes
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/verizon-twenty-first-century-fox_us_5a0e17bbe4b0e97dffec5e7f
verizon, comcast approach 21st century fox about acquiring assets
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-sadly-realizes-cramped-one-bedroom-apartment-has-en-1819578013
man sadly realizes cramped one-bedroom apartment has enough space to host party with all his friends
1
https://local.theonion.com/area-high-school-somehow-still-carrying-on-without-2011-1819573366
area high school somehow still carrying on without 2011 seniors
1
https://www.theonion.com/al-qaedas-no-114-killed-on-office-depot-run-1819568670
al-qaeda's no. 114 killed on office depot run
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-importance-of-vision_b_5342743.html
the importance of vision
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pregnant-kim-kardashian-kylie-jenner-crop-top_us_55e85205e4b0c818f61acd36
pregnant kim kardashian and kylie jenner rock sister crop tops
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/investigation-trump-foundation_us_57d881c2e4b0aa4b722d5123
new york attorney general conducting 'inquiry' into trump foundation
0
https://politics.theonion.com/ted-cruz-skyrockets-in-polls-after-head-permanently-sea-1819578665
ted cruz skyrockets in polls after head permanently sealed within iron mask
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gop-platform-planned-parenthood_us_578d5088e4b0a0ae97c31617
republican platform falsely says planned parenthood sells baby parts
0
https://politics.theonion.com/clinton-found-alive-1819586276
clinton found alive
1
https://local.theonion.com/slow-thinking-bystander-weighing-pros-and-cons-of-pulli-1819572500
slow-thinking bystander weighing pros and cons of pulling man out of river
1
https://www.theonion.com/angry-lumberjack-demands-hearty-breakfast-1819586198
angry lumberjack demands hearty breakfast
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gop-supreme-court_us_56c5df81e4b08ffac127ccab
black lawmakers say gop supreme court obstruction is racist
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/my-aunt-hillary_us_58015087e4b0985f6d1570a3
my "aunt hillary"
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/west-point-motivation-study_n_5571602.html
here's proof 'doing what you love' pays off
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/james-corden-and-stephen-curry-carpool-karaoke_us_58e394c1e4b03a26a365f37c
james corden and stephen curry are a fierce 'carpool karaoke' team
0
https://www.theonion.com/aspiring-elitist-moves-to-new-york-1819586407
aspiring elitist moves to new york
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sunday-roundup_337_b_5466098.html
sunday roundup
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/syria-chemical-weapons_n_5222313.html
syria misses another chemical weapons benchmark despite 'significant progress'
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/creative-asterisk-makes-reader-unaware-of-word-fuck-1819565047
creative asterisk makes reader unaware of word 'fuck'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/japan-cellphone-toilet-wipe_us_5869da00e4b0de3a08f8f213
japanese restrooms offer special toilet paper for wiping phones
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/joy-sucked-out-of-room-by-pumped-up-manager-1819567828
joy sucked out of room by pumped-up manager
1
https://www.theonion.com/u-s-advises-allies-not-to-border-russia-1819570023
u.s. advises allies not to border russia
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/new-emoji-middle-finger_n_5496856.html
more than 250 new emoji to be released, and we have the list
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/is-turkey-drifting-betwee_b_5874176.html
is turkey drifting between isis & putin?
0
https://politics.theonion.com/paul-ryan-announces-new-congress-sexual-harassment-trai-1820545075
paul ryan announces new congress sexual harassment training will create safe work atmosphere, plausible deniability
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/black-eyed-peas-calls-out-americas-racism-in-new-video_us_5a565f41e4b03bc4d03d794f
black eyed peas calls out america's racism in new video
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-beautiful-parenting-moment-behind-the-obamaandkids-hashtag_us_56cb3434e4b041136f179542
the beautiful parenting moment behind the #obamaandkids hashtag
0
https://politics.theonion.com/crimean-voters-excited-to-exercise-democracy-for-last-t-1819576274
crimean voters excited to exercise democracy for last time
1
https://www.theonion.com/historical-archives-ships-log-1819570215
historical archives: ship's log
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/reince-priebus-hillary-clinton_n_5347605.html
top republican says hillary clinton's health 'fair game'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trumps-new-afghanistan-plan-same-as-the-old-plan_us_599c3d35e4b0521e90cfb53c
trump's new afghanistan plan: same as the old plan
0
https://www.theonion.com/palestinian-family-trapped-under-rubble-thrilled-to-hea-1819574197
palestinian family trapped under rubble thrilled to hear 'gaza' trending on twitter
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hotels-think-you-want-this-bill-think-again-hotels_us_57fa6d72e4b0b665ad8183c2
hotels think you want this bill. think again, hotels
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/daily-meditation_n_7599438.html
daily meditation: connecting with the earth
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/starfucker-gives-stephen-baldwin-a-hand-job-1819568593
starfucker gives stephen baldwin a hand job
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-importance-of-multidi_b_5991458.html
the importance of multidisciplinary eating disorders treatment
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-rally-violence_us_56e23cfce4b0860f99d8893f
donald trump says some protesters probably deserved to get roughed up at his rallies
0
https://politics.theonion.com/single-strip-of-i-voted-stickers-more-than-enough-for-1819591940
single strip of 'i voted' stickers more than enough for midterm polling station
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/start-your-day-chia-seed-smoothie-style_b_7525170.html
start your day chia seed smoothie style
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/publicist-worried-kanye-west-s-support-of-trump-will-da-1825566028
publicist worried kanye west's support of trump will damage his carefully crafted public image as a manic self-absorbed lunatic
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/us-flags-northern-syria_us_57e138efe4b08cb14097dfa0
mysterious american flags in northern syria were planted by u.s. troops, pentagon says
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-can-you-tell-if-a-pet-rescue-group-is-legit_us_5acf9e3de4b0edca2cb7b4be
how can you tell if a dog rescue group is legit?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/why-this-mom-of-four-loves-her-jelly-abs-and-shriveled-up-skin_us_59665a23e4b005b0fdca8fd7
why this mom of four loves her 'jelly abs and shriveled up skin'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/seeing-color-in-a-colorblind-marriage_b_6681098.html
when i'm forced to see color in my colorblind marriage
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/clinton-dnc-russia-dossier-trump_us_59efc1a6e4b0bf1f8836a7c4
report: dnc and clinton campaign funded research behind trump russia dossier
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donna-edwards-inequality_us_57455f7fe4b055bb1170b207
dem rep. totally nails why congress is falling short on gender, racial equality
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sandy-powell-david-bowie_us_56d395ade4b03260bf773b82
who's that woman dressed like bowie at the oscars? introducing, sandy powell.
0
https://www.theonion.com/zamboni-crime-family-indicted-in-ice-shaving-scandal-1819586460
zamboni crime family indicted in ice-shaving scandal
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kirsten-gillibrand-trump-tweet_us_5a301297e4b01598ac489081
supporters defend kirsten gillibrand after trump delivers 'sexist smear'
0
https://www.theonion.com/vacationing-secretary-of-homeland-security-asks-neighbo-1819577153
vacationing secretary of homeland security asks neighbor to keep eye on nation over weekend
1
https://www.theonion.com/quaker-releases-new-plain-flavor-blasted-rice-cakes-1819580286
quaker releases new plain flavor-blasted rice cakes
1
https://politics.theonion.com/congress-demands-to-know-how-facebook-got-people-to-giv-1825180873
congress demands to know how facebook got people to give up their civil liberties without a fight
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/rashida-jones-flip-and-rewind-video_us_56915e63e4b0a2b6fb7056fb
rashida jones pays homage to the '90s with 'flip and rewind' music video
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nye-fireworks-displays_us_58691da1e4b0de3a08f8d2d1
here are the most breathtaking new year's eve fireworks displays
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/spider-products_us_56341151e4b06317991295ca
spiders inspire fear -- along with novel products that could change the world
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/film-to-be-made-into-john-grisham-1819564005
film to be made into john grisham
1
https://local.theonion.com/crane-operator-likes-to-start-day-with-a-quick-360-1819589492
crane operator likes to start day with a quick 360
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-other-side-of-memoria_b_7432980.html
'the other side of memorial day,' or dying in paradise
0
https://local.theonion.com/oat-farmer-seriously-thinking-about-getting-into-barley-1825109075
oat farmer seriously thinking about getting into barley
1
https://www.theonion.com/police-repeatedly-shoot-tim-cook-after-mistaking-iphone-1824184361
police repeatedly shoot tim cook after mistaking iphone for gun
1
https://local.theonion.com/womens-prison-riot-feels-gratuitous-1819565959
women's prison riot feels gratuitous
1
https://www.theonion.com/groundbreaking-study-finds-gratification-can-be-deliber-1819578388
groundbreaking study finds gratification can be deliberately postponed
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/9-excellent-reads-for-labor-day-weekend_us_59a571c2e4b0b234aecad223
9 excellent reads for labor day weekend
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/best-cities-for-grads_n_7242742.html
the 10 best cities for college grads in 2015
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/in-the-idea-of-love-lies_b_7675852.html
in 'the idea of love' lies lead to love
0
https://www.theonion.com/mugger-cant-believe-crap-victim-has-on-mp3-player-1819567411
mugger can't believe crap victim has on mp3 player
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/colonel-sanders-norm-macdonald_us_55d287cbe4b0ab468d9e2f06
kfc ads get even weirder with norm macdonald as 'real' col. sanders
0
https://local.theonion.com/stripper-thinks-customer-flirting-with-her-1819574806
stripper thinks customer flirting with her
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hedwig-and-the-angry-inch_n_5470785.html
'hedwig' takes home tony for best revival of a musical
0
https://local.theonion.com/lookalike-couple-vaguely-disquieting-1819565231
lookalike couple vaguely disquieting
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/uzo-aduba-emmys-dress_us_55f849e3e4b00e2cd5e80f90
uzo aduba's emmys dress is a work of art
0
https://www.theonion.com/revealing-spring-attire-reminds-man-he-nothing-more-tha-1819576519
revealing spring attire reminds man he nothing more than weak, hormonal ogre
1
https://www.theonion.com/overworked-nation-wishes-it-could-just-unplug-from-it-a-1824140347
overworked nation wishes it could just unplug from it all like puerto rico
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/london-life_b_7552490.html
london life
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/director-going-with-unknown-for-third-marriage-1819566115
director going with unknown for third marriage
1
https://www.theonion.com/faith-healer-loses-patient-during-routine-miracle-1819568118
faith healer loses patient during routine miracle
1
https://local.theonion.com/personal-trainer-impressed-by-man-s-improved-excuses-1819577391
personal trainer impressed by man's improved excuses
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/obamas-foreign-policy-con_b_6977980.html
obama's foreign policy: continuity rather than contradictions
0
https://local.theonion.com/area-bastards-pick-wrong-guy-to-mess-with-this-time-1819564145
area bastards pick wrong guy to mess with this time
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/two-year-cellphone-contracts-are-almost-dead-heres-everything-you-need-to-know_us_568a862ce4b014efe0dae826
two-year cellphone contracts are almost dead. here's everything you need to know
0