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https://www.theonion.com/nations-fourth-graders-continue-to-trail-nations-fifth-1819569298
nation's fourth-graders continue to trail nation's fifth-graders
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/american-muslims-trump_us_58235538e4b0e80b02ce56d1
american muslims are fearful but resilient about their place in trump's america
0
https://local.theonion.com/45-minute-phone-call-to-credit-card-company-goes-great-1819578235
45-minute phone call to credit card company goes great
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/rex-tillerson-resign-laughable_us_5a217561e4b0a02abe90cafd
rex tillerson calls reports of his ouster 'laughable'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://highline.huffingtonpost.com/articles/en/american-electoral/#day-3
waiting for primary returns at a heroin anonymous meeting
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/four-new-trumps-shaking-f_b_7438478.html
4 new trumps shaking fast track's house of (trading) cards
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/cleveland-ohio-is-magic_b_6047360.html
cleveland, ohio is a magical place
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/daveys-ice-cream_n_5592928.html
are made-from-scratch ice cream shops on the rise? we hope so
0
https://www.theonion.com/clinton-commissions-john-williams-to-compose-clintons-t-1819586242
clinton commissions john williams to compose 'clinton's theme'
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/exhausted-studio-has-done-all-it-can-in-terms-of-buildi-1819572465
exhausted studio has done all it can in terms of building excitement for 'the lincoln lawyer'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gop-debate-fact-check_us_56716791e4b0648fe30195b3
the republican debate included lots of misleading claims
0
https://local.theonion.com/former-marine-sniper-slapped-with-3-000-yard-restrainin-1819568771
former marine sniper slapped with 3,000-yard restraining order
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/angelina-jolie-coming-for-your-baby-1819567990
angelina jolie coming for your baby
1
https://www.theonion.com/hasbro-concedes-world-not-ready-for-rubik-s-chicken-1819588244
hasbro concedes world not ready for rubik's chicken
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/broadband-internet-improves-healthcare-education_b_7072130.html
3 ways broadband internet is improving health care and education
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/cat-stevens-declares-jihad-on-james-taylor-1819586374
cat stevens declares jihad on james taylor
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/subsidiary-publication-recommends-you-see-parent-corpor-1819564854
subsidiary publication recommends you see parent corporation's movie
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/homeless-shelters-brace-for-winter-storm_us_5a4ce268e4b0b0e5a7aa0819
these are a few of the shelters scrambling to offer winter storm refuge
0
https://www.theonion.com/every-conceivable-nook-in-car-stuffed-with-trash-by-sec-1819592253
every conceivable nook in car stuffed with trash by second hour of road trip
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/area-woman-worried-shes-forgetting-what-heath-ledger-lo-1819570758
area woman worried she's forgetting what heath ledger looked like
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/annise-parker-ann-coulter-hurricane-harvey_us_59acca52e4b0dfaafcf12afc
lesbian ex-mayor has perfect response to ann coulter's hurricane nonsense
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-most-standout-looks-from-black-stars-on-the-oscars-red-carpet_us_58b36f6ee4b060480e08ed07
the most standout looks from black stars on the oscars red carpet
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/elizabeth-warren-slams-bizarre-glass-steagall-statements-from-trumps-treasury-secretary_us_591f307ee4b03b485cb155cc
elizabeth warren slams 'bizarre' glass-steagall statements from trump's treasury secretary
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/khloe-kardashian-fat-sister_us_56435578e4b045bf3ded20a4
don't call khloe kardashian 'the fat sister'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/denver-fire-chief-attacked_us_569f5131e4b0fca5ba75fdee
woman jumps into suv and stabs denver fire chief, police say
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-just-wants-one-trip-to-laundromat-where-he-doesn-t-1819577191
man just wants one trip to laundromat where he doesn't meet perfect woman
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lets-get-trumps-evangelical-council-to-resign_us_599a3ac0e4b02eb2fda3213d
let's get trump's evangelical council to resign
0
https://www.theonion.com/man-desperately-trying-to-wring-every-last-ounce-of-rel-1819577977
man desperately trying to wring every last ounce of relaxation from final day of vacation
1
https://www.theonion.com/laura-bush-suspects-anniversary-card-penned-by-speech-w-1819568781
laura bush suspects anniversary card penned by speech writer
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/huffpost-hill_n_7538832.html
huffpost hill - can hillary clinton give out 600 snow shovels, meet with a bunch of rich lesbians and have it all?
0
https://local.theonion.com/pueblo-indians-can-t-keep-pace-with-area-mom-s-appetite-1819577093
pueblo indians can't keep pace with area mom's appetite for earthenware
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/grieving-daughter-says-mom-drinks-too-much_us_581c312be4b0e80b02c92159
grieving daughter says mom drinks too much and started bringing home 'random men' since dad died
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/musings-after-a-day-at-the-museum_us_595ce9d5e4b0c85b96c66554
musings after a day at the museum
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-kate-middleton-is-actually-experiencing-the-debilitating_us_59ae8dcee4b0d0c16bb52775
kate middleton and the debilitating disease that leaves you feeling lost and alone
0
https://www.theonion.com/hands-off-mom-lets-kids-create-own-psychological-issues-1819577038
hands-off mom lets kids create own psychological issues
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-perfect-road-trip_b_5544523.html
3 steps to planning the perfect road trip
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/911-thanksgiving-police-dinner_us_58394c97e4b000af95ee40ac
boy calls 911 to ask deputies over for family's thanksgiving dinner
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/elias-koteas-olinsky-chicago-pd_us_5af439f1e4b0859d11d0e255
fans erupt over fate of elias koteas' olinsky on 'chicago p.d.'
0
https://www.theonion.com/pets-death-text-messaged-1819588101
pet's death text messaged
1
https://www.theonion.com/dvd-contains-87-minutes-of-previously-unseen-movie-1819587314
dvd contains 87 minutes of previously unseen movie
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.adweek.com/fishbowlny/daily-news-threatens-union-drivers/359418?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+10000words/wxYG+(10,000+Words)
daily news threatens union drivers
0
https://www.theonion.com/chinese-newlyweds-wondering-what-they-re-going-to-do-wi-1819575426
chinese newlyweds wondering what they're going to do with all this medicinal bear bile
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sneakers-you-can-wear-to-work_us_5aff0049e4b0463cdba18516
16 fashionable sneakers you can wear to work
0
https://local.theonion.com/mental-illness-determined-not-to-let-stigma-of-area-man-1819579622
mental illness determined not to let stigma of area man define it
1
https://www.theonion.com/all-flights-grounded-after-faa-officials-suddenly-reali-1819572808
all flights grounded after faa officials suddenly realize that man was not meant to fly
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/zac-efrons-younger-brother_us_559bd4a3e4b04a9c98e828fd
zac efron's younger brother also has ridiculous abs
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/meeting-logs-obama-quietl_b_5496696.html
meeting logs: obama quietly coddling big oil on 'bomb trains' regulations
0
https://sports.theonion.com/nfl-pregame-ceremony-honors-retired-52-year-old-cornerb-1819580380
nfl pregame ceremony honors retired 52-year-old cornerback as oldest living former player
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/barbra-streisand-to-take-rare-public-dump-1819564125
barbra streisand to take rare public dump
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/new_2_b_5538655.html
reclaiming the sacred: five uniting religious principles
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-gops-stockholm-syndrome_us_59cb8c06e4b0b99ee4a9c94b
the gop's stockholm syndrome
0
https://www.theonion.com/dad-from-2150-can-t-get-enough-iraq-war-documentaries-1819576250
dad from 2150 can't get enough iraq war documentaries
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kate-hudson-nothing-compares-2-u-prince_us_572e2d0fe4b096e9f091b0a7
kate hudson shows off her pipes with cover of prince's 'nothing compares 2 u'
0
https://local.theonion.com/mother-still-searching-for-preschool-that-focuses-exclu-1819577779
mother still searching for preschool that focuses exclusively on her son
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/dear-white-people-lets-talk-about-combating-racism_us_58653517e4b014e7c72edfd7
dear white people, let's talk about combating racism
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/wild-yellowstone-celebrates-americas-first-national-park_us_56642930e4b079b2818ef7c8
take a look inside yellowstone, one of america's wildest places
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lobbyists-obama-oil-tax_us_56b3c5d4e4b01d80b245a9c0
the oil lobby has a pretty predictable response to obama's oil tax proposal
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gay-high-school-swim-team_us_5894a40ce4b0406131367531
i was openly gay on my high school team and heard slurs all the time
0
https://www.theonion.com/wacky-forensics-investigation-turns-autopsy-turvy-1819564894
wacky forensics investigation turns autopsy-turvy
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/when-spirituality-and-ent_b_5777072.html
when spirituality and entrepreneurship overlap
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/stephen-baldwins-personal-assistant-promoted-to-stephen-1819570793
stephen baldwin's personal assistant promoted to stephen baldwin
1
https://www.theonion.com/north-korea-returns-to-normalcy-with-synchronized-disco-1819573227
north korea returns to normalcy with synchronized disco jump-rope gala
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/whats-next-in-the-fight-against-malaria_b_7750338.html
resisting resistance: what's next in the fight against malaria?
0
https://www.theonion.com/report-countless-invasive-species-detained-in-epa-blac-1819576729
report: countless invasive species detained in epa black sites
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/john-kasich-rome-burns_n_6541740.html
john kasich compares federal debt to a burning rome, says republicans share blame
0
https://local.theonion.com/pathetic-4-year-old-needs-father-to-stand-on-merry-go-r-1819578196
pathetic 4-year-old needs father to stand on merry-go-round platform for entire ride
1
https://politics.theonion.com/clinton-campaign-treasurer-crushed-to-death-after-stack-1819578773
clinton campaign treasurer crushed to death after stack of campaign funds topples over
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/kendrick-lamar-deletes-rhymezone-com-from-internet-hist-1819591334
kendrick lamar deletes 'rhymezone.com' from internet history
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-to-do-about-charlottesville_us_5991d406e4b09071f69b88e2
what to do about charlottesville
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/snoop-dogg-make-america-crip_us_59ed54a9e4b0958c4682d4c3
snoop dogg rips trump in 'make america crip again'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-to-pitch-healthy-living_us_595d3917e4b0d5b458e7abe7
how to pitch healthy living
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/new-york-homeless_us_5693c9fae4b0a2b6fb70d5c9
new york homeless speak out on government aid, shelter programs
0
https://local.theonion.com/precocious-teen-able-to-read-write-1819586411
precocious teen able to read, write
1
https://local.theonion.com/grey-parrot-disappointed-to-discover-rest-of-aviary-a-b-1819580076
grey parrot disappointed to discover rest of aviary a bunch of idiots
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/person-of-interest-arrested-in-california-mosque-firebomb_us_566c8865e4b0e292150e26c6
person of interest detained after california mosque 'firebombed'
0
https://www.theonion.com/hot-girl-s-number-lingered-on-1819589202
hot girl's number lingered on
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mumbai-building-collapse-india_us_59a8083fe4b07e81d3559230
building collapse after torrential rains kills at least 21 in mumbai
0
https://www.theonion.com/teen-on-birthright-trip-hadn-t-expected-to-see-so-many-1824265633
teen on birthright trip hadn't expected to see so many dead palestinians
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/toby-keith-struggling-to-come-up-with-rhyme-for-ahmadin-1819588210
toby keith struggling to come up with rhyme for ahmadinejad
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/tiled-rooms_n_5967986.html
6 stunning rooms that prove tile deserves to be so much more than a backsplash
0
https://politics.theonion.com/paramount-home-video-pleased-to-bring-man-feature-prese-1819564190
paramount home video pleased to bring man feature presentation
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-morning-email_n_7129408.html
saturday's morning email: funnies edition
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nervous-flyer-screwed-by-pals-who-secretly-pack-dildo-in-his-bag_us_573a160ae4b08f96c183c0d9
nervous flyer screwed by pals who secretly pack dildo in his bag (nsfw)
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/colberts-mcdonalds-all-day-breakfast-prophecy_us_5638ba10e4b079a43c048075
colbert's mcdonald's all-day breakfast prophecies are coming true
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/melania-trump-responds-to-charlottesville-before-president-does_us_598f2fc2e4b08a247274ac0a
melania trump responds to charlottesville clashes before president does
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/your-compliments-are-gros_b_6072678.html
your compliments are gross and so are you
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/amazon-prime-day_us_55a66766e4b0896514cfcf69
amazon offering 'more deals than black friday' in epic prime day sale
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/integrating-roma-into-eur_b_7643810.html
integrating roma into europe's future: change must come from within
0
https://www.theonion.com/report-majority-of-mothers-would-drop-kids-off-at-ware-1819577501
report: majority of mothers would drop kids off at warehouse called 'fun zone' for hour of free time, no questions asked
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/great-barrier-reef-coral-die-off_us_583c818be4b0c3968b76c53e
great barrier reef experiences its worst coral die-off
0
https://www.theonion.com/michele-bachmann-thankful-no-americans-died-in-sikh-sho-1819573726
michele bachmann thankful no americans died in sikh shooting
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/before-the-end-of-the-yea_b_13609058.html
before the end of the year...
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nfl-catch-rule-wide-receiver_us_568d4134e4b0c8beacf52463
here's the smart thing the nfl is doing to fix its dumb catch rule
0
https://politics.theonion.com/12-of-federal-government-thats-currently-functioning-t-1822238197
12% of federal government that's currently functioning to shut down
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://gawker.com/doctor-of-man-who-contracted-hiv-on-prep-discusses-his-1762502959?utm_campaign=socialflow_gawker_twitter&utm_source=gawker_twitter&utm_medium=socialflow
doctor of man who contracted hiv on prep discusses his findings and what they mean
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/joe-scarborough-trump-rob-porter_us_5a831dabe4b0892a0353db21
joe scarborough says trump made rob porter 'the victim' in domestic abuse allegations
0
https://www.theonion.com/nytimes-coms-plan-to-charge-people-money-for-consuming-1819572509
nytimes.com's plan to charge people money for consuming goods, services called bold business move
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/cavaliers-iman-shumpert-baby-delivery_us_56730b24e4b0648fe3029e18
iman shumpert helped deliver his baby, and headphones were involved
0
https://local.theonion.com/guy-eats-own-weight-in-combos-over-three-month-period-1819566815
guy eats own weight in combos over three-month period
1
https://local.theonion.com/wife-unfazed-by-husbands-sad-e-mails-to-other-women-1819573154
wife unfazed by husband's sad e-mails to other women
1