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https://entertainment.theonion.com/logo-in-corner-of-tv-reminds-man-hes-masturbating-to-sp-1819566618
logo in corner of tv reminds man he's masturbating to spice
1
https://politics.theonion.com/shooting-suspect-released-after-not-breaking-any-arizon-1819572059
shooting suspect released after not breaking any arizona laws
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-greatest-muhammad-ali_b_10292080.html
the greatest -- muhammad ali -- dies at 74
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pccc-elizabeth-warren_n_5188934.html
progressive book club kicks off with elizabeth warren's new book
0
https://local.theonion.com/bar-table-scientists-awarded-4-beer-grant-to-complete-a-1820509165
bar table scientists awarded 4-beer grant to complete analysis on why he's not good enough for you
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/perfect-workout-music_us_55e60226e4b0aec9f354dd0c
a scientific guide for finding the perfect workout music
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lea-michele-twitter_n_5559718.html
who is hacking all of these 'glee' stars?
0
https://local.theonion.com/last-minute-of-mans-sexual-prime-expires-during-routine-1819571189
last minute of man's sexual prime expires during routine visit to dry cleaner
1
https://politics.theonion.com/latest-department-of-interior-river-count-comes-up-one-1819570995
latest department of interior river count comes up one short
1
https://politics.theonion.com/kissinger-instructs-palin-on-finer-points-of-clandestin-1819570131
kissinger instructs palin on finer points of clandestine carpet bombing
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/joan-moran-7-business-ski_b_5179134.html
joan moran: 7 business skills that make your personal life successful
0
https://www.theonion.com/architect-asks-self-how-le-corbusier-would-have-designe-1819565941
architect asks self how le corbusier would have designed this strip mall
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/greenspan-to-play-15-unannounced-small-club-shows-1819565218
greenspan to play 15 unannounced small-club shows
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/us-senate-backs-massive-increase-in-military-spending_us_59c051cfe4b0f22c4a8c0577
u.s. senate backs massive increase in military spending
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/serena-williams-wage-gap-june-2016_us_5756d76ce4b0ca5c7b500a93
serena williams has perfected her argument against the wage gap
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/911-health-law-expires_us_560c2890e4b0af3706df0d1e
9/11 health program now officially on borrowed time
0
https://politics.theonion.com/obama-orders-guantanamo-prisoners-transferred-to-next-p-1819572570
obama orders guantánamo prisoners transferred to next president
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/el-chapo-evades-capture_us_5621ca9ce4b0bce34700eee7
mexico says drug boss guzman narrowly evades capture
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/australian-reporters-devastating-take-on-trump-at-g20-goes-viral_us_59624c0de4b0615b9e9227af
australian journalist's devastating take on trump at g-20 goes viral
0
https://local.theonion.com/unpopular-police-officer-thinking-about-committing-raci-1819576863
unpopular police officer thinking about committing racially motivated offense for a little support
1
https://politics.theonion.com/exhausted-mueller-trying-to-find-trump-organization-rus-1823814584
exhausted mueller trying to find trump organization russia documents amid thousands of harassment lawsuits
1
https://www.theonion.com/god-getting-strong-urge-to-bring-back-dinosaurs-1819579692
god getting strong urge to bring back dinosaurs
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/government-shutdown-planned-parenthood_us_55f223f2e4b093be51be6a40
as shutdown looms, push to link planned parenthood with spending fight gains steam in house
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/new-years-resolution-end-date_us_56b36a39e4b01d80b24540ae
chances are your new year's resolution will end today
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/janes-wedding-short-movie_us_588bb778e4b0176377944d2f
a bride harbors an intimate secret in this haunting short film
0
https://www.theonion.com/sixth-grader-begins-work-on-pony-trilogy-1819564615
sixth grader begins work on pony trilogy
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/11/modern-day-slave-trade
can a french friar end the 21st-century slave trade?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/an-artist-confronts-his-possible-futures_b_7071360.html
an artist confronts his possible futures
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/fcc-chief-cites-special-occasion-for-allowing-vaginal-p-1819572481
fcc chief cites special occasion for allowing vaginal penetration on network sitcom
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pope-climate-change-rally_us_560449a6e4b00310edfa7f1f
activists rally behind pope's message on climate, the poor
0
https://www.theonion.com/unsold-google-glass-units-to-be-donated-to-assholes-in-1819577355
unsold google glass units to be donated to assholes in africa
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/living-life-with-heart--a_b_8129774.html
living life with heart: an interview with tony ducharme
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/badpicturemonday-is-the-hashtag-we-all-need-right-now_us_598893b5e4b07e7f2150eb5c
#badpicturemonday is the hashtag we all should embrace right now
0
https://www.theonion.com/kitten-thinks-of-nothing-but-murder-all-day-1819588260
kitten thinks of nothing but murder all day
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/song-of-redemption-the-fr_b_5542582.html
song of redemption: the frank morgan story
0
https://local.theonion.com/teamwork-mostly-karen-1819591245
teamwork mostly karen
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/game-change-sarah-palin-danny-strong_n_6745288.html
proof that it pays to piss off sarah palin
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttps://www.thedodo.com/dog-chained-up-for-more-than-10-years-1282367546.html?utm_source=HuffPo
dog chained up for decade has sweetest reaction to being set free
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/tom-of-finland-emoji_us_5899f44fe4b09bd304bdbd6e
if you love tom of finland we've got the perfect new emoji for you
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/standing-rock-and-palestine-the-struggle-for-justice_us_5838e22ee4b0c2ab94436936
palestinians and standing rock native americans share a struggle for justice
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/us-russia-syria-rebels_us_58627885e4b0de3a08f610b9
russia calls u.s. move to better arm syrian rebels a 'hostile act'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jenna-lyons-work-dress-code_n_5499611.html
j. crew's jenna lyons doesn't care how you dress for work
0
https://politics.theonion.com/departing-obama-tearfully-shoos-away-loyal-drone-follow-1819579548
departing obama tearfully shoos away loyal drone following him out of white house
1
https://www.theonion.com/breaking-everyone-at-bar-cooler-than-area-man-1819577306
breaking: everyone at bar cooler than area man
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/colin-kaepernicks-white-parents-very-proud_us_585013ade4b04c8e2bb1d520
colin kaepernick's white parents say they're 'very proud' of him
0
https://politics.theonion.com/trump-maps-out-plan-for-first-100-days-of-not-conceding-1819579348
trump maps out plan for first 100 days of not conceding election
1
https://www.theonion.com/progressive-company-pays-both-men-and-women-78-of-what-1819577597
progressive company pays both men and women 78% of what they should be earning
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-cease-and-desist-bannon_us_5a4da9b5e4b06d1621bd1055
trump lawyer sends cease-and-desist letter to steve bannon
0
https://www.theonion.com/lapd-going-about-day-in-uncomfortable-silence-1819590736
lapd going about day in uncomfortable silence
1
https://www.theonion.com/daylight-saving-time-yields-massive-daylight-surplus-1819568769
daylight saving time yields massive daylight surplus
1
https://www.theonion.com/lab-mouse-nervous-for-first-day-of-new-job-getting-canc-1819579587
lab mouse nervous for first day of new job getting cancer
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pro-wrestlers-penis-takedown-just-got-bigger_us_56868a0ce4b0b958f65bb90b
pro wrestler's penis takedown just got bigger
0
https://www.theonion.com/new-documentary-reveals-seaworld-forced-orca-whales-to-1819575806
new documentary reveals seaworld forced orca whales to perform nude
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/taliban-making-military-g_n_5623938.html
taliban making military gains in afghanistan
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/queen-victorias-secretlif_b_6878642.html
queen victoria's secret:lifting the fig leaf
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hugh-hewitt-donald-trump-vote_us_581a523be4b08f9841ad069b
radio host hugh hewitt 'inclined' to vote for donald trump after urging him to drop out
0
https://www.theonion.com/everyone-in-sears-spanking-a-child-1819576488
everyone in sears spanking a child
1
https://politics.theonion.com/you-are-not-your-job-obama-reminds-himself-throughou-1819577504
'you are not your job,' obama reminds himself throughout shower
1
https://politics.theonion.com/parents-of-obama-volunteer-couldnt-be-more-proud-sick-1819570179
parents of obama volunteer couldn't be more proud, sick of son
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/boys-in-the-band-broadway_us_5a67578be4b0e5630073d967
matt bomer, zachary quinto and more prep 'boys in the band' for broadway
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://thinkprogress.org/education/2016/07/20/3800220/trans-students-file-federal-suits/
lawsuit: trans students made to wear green bracelets to id themselves
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-things-moms-carry_b_5204885.html
the things moms carry
0
https://politics.theonion.com/bernie-sanders-asks-anyone-who-s-serious-about-breaking-1819578799
bernie sanders asks anyone who's serious about breaking up big banks to meet him on corner of canal and bowery at midnight
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/vladimir-putin-megyn-kelly_us_5931ebfae4b02478cb9bafbc
vladimir putin suggests american hackers framed russia
0
https://local.theonion.com/area-93-year-old-has-death-after-life-experience-1819586410
area 93-year-old has death-after-life experience
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/new-harry-potter-film-turns-children-on-to-magic-of-not-1819566252
new harry potter film turns children on to magic of not reading
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/citizens-united-anthony-kennedy_us_5637c481e4b0631799134b92
anthony kennedy's citizens united disclosure salve 'not working'
0
https://politics.theonion.com/excited-mike-pence-assures-john-mccain-he-has-his-last-1825858131
excited mike pence assures john mccain he has his 'last rites' kit ready to go just in case
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/dump-trump-unruh-rules_us_57675d8ae4b0fbbc8beac99c
dump trumpers think they need just 57 votes to win
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/butter-baked-goods_n_6027892.html
a guide to how much butter is in your favorite baked goods
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/divorce-lessons-_b_6374662.html
5 lessons from a twenty-something divorcée
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nancy-pelosi-democratic-leader_us_594bc880e4b0a3a837bd7478
nancy pelosi to critics: bring it on
0
https://www.theonion.com/report-one-guy-really-fucking-up-4-way-frisbee-circle-1819592309
report: one guy really fucking up 4-way frisbee circle
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/nations-dads-treated-to-mark-knopfler-meet-and-greet-1819572746
nation's dads treated to mark knopfler meet-and-greet
1
https://local.theonion.com/woman-angered-when-veiled-anger-expressed-as-mock-anger-1819565260
woman angered when veiled anger expressed as mock anger is interpreted as real anger
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/zachary-quinto-starbucks-james-corden_us_5aba2878e4b0decad04df739
zachary quinto uses fake name at starbucks. customer gets steamed.
0
https://www.theonion.com/temple-university-receives-anonymous-donation-to-build-1819577226
temple university receives anonymous donation to build center for discrediting rape allegations
1
https://local.theonion.com/local-child-has-run-of-the-mill-imagination-1819571522
local child has run-of-the-mill imagination
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hannibal-buress-bill-cosby_n_6901764.html
hannibal buress jokes about getting death threats after cosby routine
0
https://local.theonion.com/missing-boy-scout-earns-publicity-badge-1819567969
missing boy scout earns publicity badge
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/tonga-olympian-pita-taufatofua-wins-olympic-opening-ceremony-again_us_5a7d90d4e4b0c6726e1241f9
shirtless tonga olympian pita taufatofua wins olympic opening ceremony again
0
https://www.theonion.com/ant-colony-comes-to-halt-after-death-of-popular-worker-1819571550
ant colony comes to halt after death of popular worker
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/liberal-activists-encourage-citizens-to-call-their-late-1819580353
liberal activists encourage citizens to call their late-night hosts and urge them to oppose tax plan
1
https://local.theonion.com/man-has-trouble-growing-full-beard-of-bees-1819574717
man has trouble growing full beard of bees
1
https://local.theonion.com/newly-unemployed-woman-enjoys-equal-pay-for-first-time-1819573962
newly unemployed woman enjoys equal pay for first time in career
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/how-peter-thiels-gawker-battle-could-open-a-war-against-the-press
how peter thiel's gawker battle could open a war against the press
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/his-name-is-ahmed-not-clock-kid_us_56279af9e4b0bce3470321a6
his name is ahmed mohamed, not 'clock kid'
0
https://www.theonion.com/carhartt-introduces-rugged-work-thong-1819587919
carhartt introduces rugged work thong
1
https://local.theonion.com/cat-seemed-perfectly-content-right-up-until-point-he-bo-1819575397
cat seemed perfectly content right up until point he bolted out of room
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/ted-danson-totally-nails-tonight-show-interview-1819569720
ted danson totally nails tonight show interview
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/doomocracy-haunted-house-pedro-reyes_us_57d7f4dfe4b0fbd4b7bb5afe
america's election cycle is so scary that haunted houses are getting political
0
https://local.theonion.com/each-line-of-mastercard-billing-statement-evokes-infuri-1819576662
each line of mastercard billing statement evokes infuriating vacation memory
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/andrew-lincoln-will-make-you-hope-rick-dies-on-the-walking-dead_us_58dbc48ae4b0cb23e65d442b
andrew lincoln will make you hope for rick's death scene on 'the walking dead'
0
https://politics.theonion.com/trump-campaign-ponders-going-negative-1819579096
trump campaign ponders going negative
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/afghanistan-bombings-journalists-killed_us_5ae72ab4e4b055fd7fce3c40
afghanistan bombings result in country's deadliest day for journalists
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/georgetown-racial-profiling_us_561fc20fe4b050c6c4a482d7
some d.c. businesses are abusing a safety program to racially profile people
0
https://www.theonion.com/copies-of-da-vinci-code-litter-crash-site-1819587603
copies of da vinci code litter crash site
1
https://www.theonion.com/man-adds-a-few-personalized-tracks-to-standard-new-girl-1819566868
man adds a few personalized tracks to standard new-girlfriend mix cd
1
https://www.theonion.com/air-traffic-controller-likes-pattern-he-has-going-1819588533
air traffic controller likes pattern he has going
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/who-isnt-running-for-pres_b_7548548.html
who isn't running for president?
0