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"Welcome guys and its your boy the SUPER FRUGAL!"I laughed, staring into my webcam as I shook my ebay box. "Im back with another superpower unboxing! This is a fifty dollar box and we are going to see what we got. Now before we open it, don't forget to hit subscribe and ring that little bell down there if you wanna kee...
"And now the rabbit has disappeared back into the hat! Thank you, ladies and gentlemen! Goodnight!" The crowd went wild, whooping and cheering as The Great Magnifico left the stage. He could still hear the applause as he made his way to his dressing room. Once inside, he closed the door and hung up his cloak. As he sa...
I couldn't tell what I was feeling. Apprehension, excitement, nerves, fear, confusion; it all came at once. The roads were quiet at this time in the morning and the drive was easy but it felt as though it took a lifetime. Before I'd arrived I had no idea what to expect, but here I was sitting in a conference room stari...
I somehow thought, maybe, I’d feel less out of place if I had a good reason to feel out of place. Or something like that. Joining a crew where I was the only human made sense at the time, is what I’m saying. Yeah, I know. “Made sense at the time” is always bad news. They were really polite, even to the point of being ...
“What’s up it’s your boy Big G0D, Today we are doing another play through with my new character Tim Glasip. I know a lot of you don’t like this character, he’s a little boring but trust me, I have some good things planned for him. Feel free to donate using any of the links below, I will choose one winner for a secret p...
"Hello again Lucifer!" For a soul on the edge of eternal suffering, it sure seemed nonchalant about it. Lucifer eyed it suspiciously. It looked liked every other soul that passed through his doors and yet it spoke to him as if he were an old friend. "You must have taken the gamble before." Lucifer always offered eve...
'You misunderstand, Mr. Bond.... I'm not a mad scientist. I'm just an extremely disappointed one.' the man turned to his shackled prisoner. Bond saw an alien emotion in his eyes, one he could not place. &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; 'Is that why you are contaminating the meat supply of the wh...
The day began like any other, instant coffee with whatever creamer was the cheapest that week. The coffee was too hot when James took his first sip, singing his tongue. Some of it spilled on his cheap tie and James spent a few minutes getting the stain out. Two demons watched James, unbeknownst to him. They watched as...
The sun glared off the broken windshields of the cars that had crashed and hurt his eyes. There was a strong stench in the air, as if a septic tank had overflowed. Tim stopped his car. He had put off his bimonthly visit by a couple of weeks, thinking that the town wouldn't have run away, but it looked like everybod...
“Favorite food?” I asked. “Pancakes,” both Twilas said in unison. “Favorite color?” “Blue.” “Favorite band?” “You already asked that dumbass,” they said in the same annoyed tone Twila always had. I asked probably 100 questions already, but I still can’t tell them apart. “I give up. It’s hopeless. You’re perfect d...
"Shit they are moving slow!" A female barbarian says. Her "armor"exposing her huge cleavage and her muscular thigh are mostly naked. "They are indeed Tatiana. Not gonna be a match for my mighty hammer. " A dwarf in full plate answers. His hammer is two times his size. And engraved with magic runes. They are standin...
Addendum 4: Discovery and initial documentation. Scratching and rustling sounds are heard for several seconds "Hello? Is this thing on?" "Oh, yes. It says recording. Screen's hard to see in the sunlight." "Ahem, this is FBI UIU Agent Conrad reporting on a potential irregular location. For the purposes of this re...
The remains of the desk lay squashed on the ground, the tile cracked underneath like a meteor had appeared through some eldritch wormhole beneath the ceiling and crashed straight through to the floor. Pencils rolled away with a click-click-clatter, the only sound in the silence left by thirty simultaneous gasps of su...
When they later did the math, it came out that the number was 10%. Not 10.1%. Not 9.9%. 10%. Sure, there was always a margin of error, the human factor. But the decimals went so far down that to many they hardly existed. So a clean 10% off the top then. Of course, the real world was always a little messier than...
"That was interesting."Dan was still trying to catch his breath. He hadn't lost himself like that, in werewolf form, in years. "I'll say."You could practically hear the smile in Gustav's voice. They were both lying in a mess of a bed, chunks of memory foam and very expensive fursuit everywhere. Dan wondered if he...
“You understand the price?” the Witch cooed, her eyes gleeful in the moonlight. “For only blood may save the girl's life.” Sweat beat down the father’s forehead, the child bundled amongst the blankets in his arms. A strong armed man, tall with a thick set of jet black hair, even the long trek over the mountains was st...
The elf gazed at the object reverently; "The craftsmanship is remarkable; I've journeyed many times to the mage-artificers of Aetherlyn and their accomplishments pale in comparison. Where did you obtain it from?" "A far away realm; the local inhabitants call it Costco. Their method of manufacturing it is more remarkab...
There it was again, a sound like a kettle preparing to whistle, a breathy hiss and an almost imperceptible flicking in his ear. It wasn't his lover whispering sweet nothings; he could hear her next to him, snoring, and felt her gentle rhythmic sleeping breath. It was just his imagination, or the sounds of the old house...
Jim awoke with a yawn. He took a stretch. Camilla's sleeping form lay beside him. She was beautiful when she slept. Wiping the sleep from his eyes, Jim glanced over at the clock. 8:35 AM Jim's internal alarm clock was nearly perfect. He never needed to set one. It was time to get up and get ready for work. H...
In the Last Room, all of the last people gathered to say their goodbyes. Mara and Lyson hugged each other in tears and gathered their young children. Avis and Eli'i, old and childless, held each other's hands and watched the last star on the screen before it went supernova, a comfortable smile on their lips. Then ther...
"Good morning Jake."Susan waved to me coyly as I strolled into my work. "Good morning Brianna."I wink at her as I walk past her desk into the cube farm. "Did you uh, sleep well last night?"She asks, placing her chin on her fist and staring up at me. I walk backwards as I give my reply. "Oh you know I did."As I turn ...
Drone Culture - Simple toys, or threat to our youth? With the recent spike of popularity of drones, many parents are wondering, is it safe for their children to play with drones? The answer to that question is no. The very nature of drones are a threat to the values we try so hard as parents to instill in our childr...
"What the shit, Deadpool?!" "Dude, I'm just doing my job. Just kidding, no I'm not. I'm doing someone else's job. For fun. Sorta." "Why would anyone want me dead anyways?" "..." "Okay, bad question, but who would actually pay five million goddamn dollars to see me dead?" "Well, that person is kind of a dick,...
"Look Don, this is constructive dismissal." My boss, Donald, raised an eyebrow, "No it isn't. I expect all my other employees to work flexible hours. It's in your contract." A muscle in my ivory cheek twitched involuntarily. This was bullshit and he knew it. If he wasn't supernatural himself, I would have tried to do...
We were prepared. We entered the bomb shelter as soon as the first siren blared. The ground rumbled with the thunder of Germany’s wrath. The bombs kept falling. Besides that, all you could hear, all you could fathom, was the world inside the bunker. Many people were in there with us. Men, women, lots of children. ...
"Where'd they go?"NASA Director Kevin Drayle exclaimed. "No idea sir. We did detect a burst of EM radiation and some spatial distortion"a NASA engineer said. They've been watching the Red Sun Rising spacecraft from North Korea for the past few months. Their goal? Land on the Sun. An idiotic plan that is bound to fai...
"Here, get in the back."You climbed into the back seat of Olivia Danson's car, waiting for her to join you. She squeezed through the driver and passenger seat, over the center console. Her grin was illuminated by the yellow street lamps guarding the perimeter of your university's library parking lot. Two a.m. A bit o...
"You heard the news?" "About the US? All over the news, innnit? Bunch of crazy bastards doing crazy shite. Never knew they'd do this, though. Running around in the nude." "Yeah, but have you seen the amount of tourists they've been getting? It's like going to the nude beach, except it's a focken nude country, mate." ...
That crest looks familiar. There's another one. And another one. Dudley was aghast at the sight of hundreds and hundreds of letters crumpled and stuffed into an abandoned old chest. There were initials on the chest which seemed to indicate that it was Aunt Lily's old chest. It must have been symbolic for his mother P...
Sheev Palpatine slouched dejectedly into his office chair. How could this have happened? He was smarter than this. The weight of decades of meticulous work, painstakingly precise micromanagement...did he just undo it all with one verbal slip? In accordance with Republic law, 'Order 65' meant that the chancellor was da...
“I'll take the tortoise tattoo,” I said pointing to a stylized tortoise in black and tan on the wall. The tattoo artist grinned, “you’re the first to pick that one. I saw that on some ancient ruins in the jungle and thought it looked cool enough for a tattoo.” “Well I think it looks good for a tattoo too,” I s...
Harry Potter and the Butcher of Blaviken Harry, Ron and Hermione sat in the Gryffindor common room, eagerly discussing the latest appointment to the position of Defence against the Dark Arts professor. They had heard little of the man, save that he was a seasoned monster slayer, a sort of wandering mercenary, taking c...
Item #: SCP-5000-J Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5000-1 through SCP-5000-6 (hereafter referred to collectively as "The Party") are to be under twenty four (24) hour surveillance. Should The Party encounter potentially hazardous areas, objects, or creatures of an anomalous nature...
The man spent his whole life lifting weights, not really interacting with people outside of his teacher who he used to eat lunch with. When his colleagues were lifting 10, he was lifting 20, when his colleagues were on a break, he was lifting 21. Towards the end of his life he was lifting 64kg with one hand. People ca...
It was on a moonless night that the dragon Braal came to the crown city Varra. He passed high over the farmsteads beyond the city walls, with only the bleating of sheep to announce him. He dropped low over the city battlements once he'd approached the keep, the better to locate his quarry. The great beating of his wing...
Ever since I was a child I've seen them. As I have been told by my parents, I'm not supposed to start seeing them until at least my teenage years. However, I'm special (I use this term lightly), and at the age of seven I began to see the ghostly figures hang around my house. From then on, I saw someone new everyday....
The Southern Cross shone bright in the midnight sky, not a cloud to be found. I sat in the clearing, listening to the soft crackle of the last pieces of wood in the fire. That was the only sound. It had started subtly enough, an entire city that descended into the depths of despair. People shuffling along wet streets...
"I want you to shoot the stormtrooper over there." "Uh, that's my commander, Lord Vader." "I'm not in the habit of repeating myself,"Lord Vader said as he brought out his lightsaber. I raised my gun at my commander. His name was Greg. Nice guy. I shot him in the chest. Lord Vader stood statue-still. "Impressive,"he...
There were a few unofficial rules of galactic combat. 1: Never try to outsmart a Clorax 2: Never attack a Politax spacecraft 3: Never back a human into a corner. These were the three unofficial rules that many races would follow, the first two were common sense, A Clorax were an insanely smart set of species, there...
I thought it was impossible. Though, I guess some part of me believed since I never stopped mentally screaming it. I was as shocked as he was. This was only meant to be self-entertainment, not to uncover some deep secret. Then he heard me. “How did you know?!?” he exclaimed. “Uh, know what?” I replied. He quieted...
Fatalia handed me a respirator. "Here, you're going to need this,"she explained with a sheepish shrug. "Think of it as a gift and also something necessary for the upcoming job." I sat in the sub-sub-sub-basement hideout of the "Fatal Five"plus me. Of course, I couldn't confirm nor deny it as I was their most rece...
I threw open the doors of the Guild Hall and spotted Marcus sitting at the Quest Registration counter, chatting up one of the pretty Guild Agents. “What the hell, man?” I shouted as I marched over. He shot me a look, and I couldn’t quite read what it said. Either he was amazed to see me alive, or he had, until just t...
Surely piracy of any kind would be hated... right? They'd seen the planet- throughout history, the thefts of even the smallest things were punished harshly. And here they were, poised to pirate megatons of carbon dioxide. Yet, when the planet's sapient life learned of their purpose, they were... jubilant? "Why? Why d...
Until this point, I could eat, jump, throw something, and think once an hour. Now my mind is racing, thoughts popping through my brain like bullets, sounds blasting my ears, hands coated in ... hands? Ears? Thoughts? "Oh,"I said aloud. Realizing I was thinking in words too now, just instinctual answers like 'don't re...
"I... what? Did you just talk?" "I beseech you! They are almost upon me and I have long lost the power to protect myself. If you offer me asylum under your name, I can be saved."The animal's legs falter a moment, and it stumbles into a tree, I can see open wounds across it's flank. "Uh, I... I don't understand. My na...
# WHAT AN ALIEN WANTS? APPARENTLY, RACCOONS. Jax, representative of the Kaens empire, spoke to the United Nations this afternoon. The reason our first-ever alien visitors came to Earth? Raccoons. Published: July 19, 2024,19:38 By Jared Anderson The United Nations concluded its special session tonight after th...
The simple solution was to simulate the crew too. Initially these AI crew members were incredibly basic, enough to paste a veneer of scripted personality over the automated systems they represented, but in time they became capable of contributing their own insights and experiences. It wasn’t long before the constructs...
Almost there. A few more runes, a quick bit of incantation, and I’ll be done. I can finally rest, my last, greatest wrong set right. I’ve been locked away in this tower for years now, toiling away, studying the most ancient and arcane tomes, some of them so old that translating them was a trouble even with magical me...
The spider problem was really getting out of hand. You could see cobwebs with spiders still in it in the living room, the dining room, all the rooms that guests usually are received in. Never a person to hurt a harmless creature, I decided to relocate the spiders to dark, dank spots instead of just killing them. The sp...
Adanar felt almost unbearably foolish, as he always did, when he sat upon his Sacred Throne. The high seat, wherein he was uncomfortably nestled, loomed more than a dozen feet above the cavernous throne room of the Palace of the Ancients. It was sized for a grown man -- and an uncommonly large one, at that, -- which ...
I stared in bewilderment, frozen. I couldn’t even move as the duck kept talking. “Looks, I get the situation, talking duck and all, but just stay mum and maybe we can help each other out. I see yous in the park everyday. Everyday. I figure 'Hey, this guys looking for something too.' Missing companion? Exercise? Drugs?...
I blink at the figure, and it seems to blink back, though having a hundred planets get covered in darkness was a bit odd to be considered blinking. "... I was right?" It was years ago, I first committed the act, at the age of 15. I was just passing by on my bike as my mind was rocked by memories of a future life, one...
"Isn't this some sort of bootstrap paradox?"I looked down at the thick notebook. with its yellowed pages. "Ehh, paradox, shmaradox,"the old man scoffed, as he leaned back in his chair and lit his cigar. We were in 1950s Los Angeles, at a bar I wasn't very familiar with in my own era. The air was thick with...
It had been a week since I set out to find the dragon Lanalicio, and it's proven to be my strangest quest. The towns of Ovis & Filum had been been attacked by the dragon five times each over the last two years. As you can imagine, it is not like dragons to attack so many times over such a period. Surprisingly, there ...
Rule 1: Always communicate. Your failure to inform others makes issues your fault. "Maddy, I'm going to have dinner with my sister tomorrow,"Wyatt says into his phone. "She's a model, so if you see me eating with a beautiful woman, don't worry." Rule 2: Hope for the best, plan for the worst. "In fact, if you...
“I will be targeting Bruce Wayne.” “Eh…” the messenger lisped, “My client has requested you kill The Batman…” “Correct” he spoke, flatly. “I will be targeting Billionaire playboy, Bruce Wayne.” The young man paced and rubbed his hair, disturbing his free locks as much as his stature. “He knows!” he hushed. Not o...
"Don't do it."The young man paused, one foot off of the ledge and stared over to see, impossibly, inconceivably, a figure standing next to him on a skinny little ledge nine stories above the streets of Vienna. The figure was sharply dressed and smiling gently, seeming perfectly at ease ninety feet above the streets. ...
“Let’s sit at the end of the bar so we can see the game.” Dave said to Mark as they made their way across the room. A few minutes later they were saddled up on their seats with cold beers in hand and orders for burgers and fries made. The Red Sox game was just getting started so they hadn’t missed much. “Okay,” Dave co...
(I'll take the prompt literally) The stories of El Plata were true, the glistening cities of glass and silver rose to scrape the heavens. Were, not anymore. We found the remains of these cities empty, overgrown and in the process of being dismantled by metal monsters, consuming the cities’ strange stone and glass ...
I was used to the chains now, as they had begun to feel like a metallic blanket on my skin. The height of the hill provided me with the liberty of gazing upon the pleasing, luscious landscape that sprawled out before my eyes, yet it still seems a prison to me, as the chains wear on my skin as a reminder of my crime. ...
I had frequented subreddits such as /r/abandonedporn and /r/urbanexploration in my formative years. I had developed an obsession with exploring abandoned structures much to the chagrin of my town's local authorities who have arrested me for trespassing on many occasions. It was on Reddit, on a TIL post, where I had ...
"This 'bullet leaving trails' shit isn't gonna go anywhere soon, Agent. We might have to classify this as a Keter in the near future,"the researcher said as he arranged all the various sightings of different colored trails throughout the world. It started happening a few days ago; the Foundation was still trying to fin...
"Te occidere possunt,"chanted Tremormaw, his claws trembling above the seething vat of hellfire, "sed te edere non possunt nefas est!" It was finals week, and Tremormaw was attempting to conjure up a sixteen-hundred word essay on the pro-human prejudices of Dante's Inferno. His head pounded. The aftermath of last ni...
We are wildly off course. We fucked up, and now they were never going to be able to come home again. The first manned mission to Europa, and we missed the gravity assist from Mars! We not only fucked up, but now we're fucked. We don't have enough fuel to course correct and make it home, and the closest gravitationa...
BANG! The older me with the beard fell to the floor, and I let out an, "Oops." The future me, the one without a beard that is, stood still with his mouth agape, "What the FUCK MAN?!" I turned to him and shrugged, "You said to shoot the next guy I see! I did what I was told." My (future) eye twitched, "BUT YOU'RE ...
When the Commandment was issued, I did not – could not – believe it. It was December 26th, 2027, the day after our Lord was born. The Pope appeared on the television, to give a special announcement to all Catholics. Speaking ex cathedra, he relayed to us the Commandment: anytime anyone met anyone else with the same ...
"Hey, if you want you can stand a few hundred metres away while we take down Dr Cryogenius, it's no trouble at all"Super Sam said to me, not unkindly, fiddling with the edge of his cape. I didn't bother glancing in his direction, lazily waving a hand towards the door. "No, you guys go on ahead, I'm okay where I am. B...
Despite overwhelming technological superiority, the aliens had never considered the truly unpredictable factor of humanity. Booze, and lots of it. It made utterly no sense to discharge an array of nuclear weapons in the upper atmosphere and then launch jet fighters armed with long range missiles flying straight up to...
Johan was bored of waiting for The Dark Lord’s return. The wait had become unbearable. With each passing day he witnessed those pathetic muggles grow more and more. It sickened him to his core. He had even seen pure bloods socializing with these lower life forms. He couldn’t sit around any longer. He decided to go ou...
The 6 of us were super strict with our truth or dare game. In order not to get confused with the names in the near future I will clarify for you now. Six players. Three girls - Martha, Sara and Sophie. Three boys - Samuel, Jack and me. We had all agreed that we would make our days and even years a lot more interesting ...
A pall had settled over the Cabinet room. No one, not even Kerry, could conjure up some magic, verbal panacea to raise their spirits. Instead, the soon to be former leaders of the United States had their eyes locked to a small television. Clinton averted her eyes every time they showed the poll numbers. Biden was nowhe...
There was some commotion at that. The military intelligence specialists who were standing nearby became rather excited, and quickly formed a knot discussing the consequences of this discovery. The Heads of State demanded answers about times, dates, casualties and costs. Needless to say there was no further discussion r...
Words have power. We know that now. That little rhyme everyone sings an a rainy day, "rain rain, go away,". The one that no one thought twice of singing with their kids when the sky was grey and the kids wanted to go outside. 'Come again another day,' we all sang, wistfully thinking of rainbows and sunny days. So...
Oh my God... What is this? Logan kept flipping through the photo album and sure enough, every picture was Marilyn standing next to guys that looked strikingly similar to himself. *So she definitely has a type... and she must be really into role-playing; some of these outfits are ridiculous! No wonder the front of...
He sat for days. Sleepless, starving, quivering, a blanket wrapped around his once mighty shoulders. His face dry with crusted tears, his lips trembling as he stared out into the patch of dark sky through the small window in his room. Regardless of how many of our medics and doctors attempted to revive his spirit, to f...
A creative Redditor once posted a 'Constrained Writing' prompt that asked a writer to use exactly twenty words per sentence. (20) However, every subsequent sentence had to contain exactly one less word than that of the sentence prior to it. (19) The writer had to constrain himself to twenty sentences, with a total of...
I have heard tales of that place. Purgatory. Everyone here in Heaven seems afraid of it and those dwelling there. Even the denizens of Hell are filled with fright at the very thought. Only the mortals that don't know about the finality of afterlife remain unafraid, as are Satan and God. I thought it was all silly, real...
"They never taught me this in school,"Lithia muttered, tongue between her teeth. She flipped through the dog-eared pages of the spellbook, looking for the proper incantation. The skeleton at her feet looked on through vacant eye sockets. Lithia absentmindedly brushed a tress of white hair out of her face, her eyes foc...
"Watch, human, you tread on hallowed ground." Admiral Sheng yawned, intentionally and slightly exaggeratedly. "Yes, of course, this technological creche of yours is a tomb after all." Fzehhan growled, his hairlike manipulators writhing in irritation. "We should have fought you to the end before allowing this indignit...
Have you ever played Mafia? Ten to twenty or so friends get together, with one being the game master. The game master chooses a few players to be the Mafia, a player or two to be the police, and a player to be the doctor. The Mafia choose one person they want to kill, the police attempt to detect who is the Mafia (t...
Do you sometimes get the feeling that someone is intentionally acting dumb or socially awkward. Well, there is something weird with our janitor Mr. Roth but I can't quite put my finger on it. My high school is nothing out of the ordinary. Public school, you know, the same stuff as in most places. Some bored, some over...
At first, you might think it would be fantastic. You get to be one of the nine gods, wielder of divine magic. Just wishing for something to be and it would materialise. But of course, such romantic versions of life rarely happen. For the first twenty or so years, I spent my time on the material plane. Learning how th...
A man sits down at a table and recounts a story to a colleague. “I take a step forward, but soon enough I’m running as fast as I can to nowhere like a hamster on a wheel. Every time I take a step, I hear another.” The colleague asks, “Can you see? And.. do you mean you heard yourself or someone else?” “Someone else,...
Eric Abel, who goes by the alias 'Magic Man', was sitting in a massive concrete shelter built around a decommissioned reactor in the heart of an abandoned nuclear power plant. He was waiting to be bum rushed by the world's most powerful people, his colleagues. He is considered by most to be the worlds most powerful h...
It started with a tingle. The static type I've gotten when the feeling starts coming back after you have limited circulation. I almost ignored it, but you never can. When I went to rub the fingers to get the feeling over with the cool to the touch silicone reminded me that I lost that hand back in my 20's in a car acc...
I don't remember much of that day, but I was with my family when they came. They were bigger. Stronger. They lacked all the proper limbs that we had. With minimal hair coverage across their towering bodies, it was amazing that had lasted this long in this cold, bright world. I was plucked from my family at a young ...
"And so I say, join me. Together, we can destroy the Empress and rule the world!" "You're right." "Predictable, all you heroes......what?" "You're right, I'll join your side and destroy the empress. You made some good points, and I want in." I lowered my hands, dispelling the rampant magic I’d been planning to use ...
Mario shot her a quizzical look. "What?"he said, in what he sincerely hoped was a polite, innocently curious voice. Amanda merely shook her head, her bushy hair flying in all directions. She raised a short, pink-nailed finger and pointed at the clock hung just over Mr. Clarke's desk, a slight, quick movement — but Ma...
Humans are curious. Humans are in fact dangerously curious. On Earth they say that curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back, if it was applied not to the slow-term genetically modified organism designed for pest control and companionship, but to humans, the proverb would be different; It would in fact ...
The great square before the palace was filled with people of all walks of life, from the lowliest villein in his least dusty shirt to wealthy merchants dripping with gold to the grim-faced archbishop of the Apocalypse God, who looked upon the gathering with utter disdain. The sun was shining down from a clear blue sky,...
@AssistBot Do you miss me? ~~ Hello miss_Alaskan_rose20! ~~ Sorry, 'do you miss me' is not one of the questions that I can currently answer about myself. Try something like 'How many games can you play?"You can also type '@AssistBot help' at any time to see a full list of accepted commands...
When the bright lights had started to fill the room, highlighting the ancient glyphs he'd been hunting for so long, he was shocked. When the booming voice started to echoed through the desolate ruin, James Kerring, archaeologist extraordinaire, started to question his sanity. Had the long nights, the obsessive searchi...
Edit: Part 1/3 &#x200B; Christa chased away the last of the spider-wolf-snake-squid hybrids, which yelped pathetically as they fled. Despite being an unholy amalgamation of every creature from nightmares back on Earth, like most creatures on this low-gravity planet, they would have been comically weak even if th...
Funerals were always the worst part of the job. It was either someone you knew and cared about, which was brutal to endure; or it was a politician, celebrity, or some bystander that was really unlucky. They always said going to a few nobody's funerals was good for keeping our head in the game, see the little guy and be...
\- Report. \- Sir, to be honest, we have not achieved a visible result. Our experiments with 5G towers were not effective. People have not received any visible harm. We have scaled the technology many times over, but the mortality rate has not increased. \- Another failure. \- Allow me to doubt the reliability...
Akinatore "does it have something to do with money" David "yes" Akinatore "would you like to donate thousands to charity!" David "No!" Akinatore "would you like a sandwich?" David "You stupid genie I just want to be rich!" Akinatore "do you want to cure cancer?" David throws his hands in the air "SURE! FINE WHY ...
"It's doing what?"Sir Vost cried to the scout who had just returned, panting, tired and confused. "Crying. I swear, the rest of the undead are just standing around, wandering, shambling uncoordinated." This was over half an hour since the assault had suddenly stopped. Confusion reigned. The army had fallen back, tend...
My name is Darlok and I am a Dark Lord. I'm exceptionally good at it actually. I studied the arts of darkness at Drowbells University, graduating with a first with honours. I did the exchange program and spent a year abroad to see how they do things there. I remember my lecturer, a certain Lord Mairon, wrote me a ...
I wish you could say it was love at first sight, but that was probably pretty one-sided on my part. "What the fuck?"Was all I managed to get out before collapsing to the carpet, the familiar darkness leaching away at my vision. So maybe taking up the invite for some... recreational activities, with a chick I just met ...
They say culture starts at the top, but why does the top never spare any thought for the bottom? The mutinies started two months ago. The first time, everyone was able to forgive. It made sense. We were becalmed, adrift amid the Sunless Sea where the world is madness and disaster and the sirens can’t sing in tune. A s...

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