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When I bent over her I could see that she was still asleep. Her lips |
were parted, and she was breathing--not softly as usual with her, but in |
long, heavy gasps, as though striving to get her lungs full at every |
breath. As I came close, she put up her hand in her sleep and pulled the |
collar of her nightdress close around her throat. Whilst she did so |
there came a little shudder through her, as though she felt the cold. I |
flung the warm shawl over her, and drew the edges tight round her neck, |
for I dreaded lest she should get some deadly chill from the night air, |
unclad as she was. I feared to wake her all at once, so, in order to |
have my hands free that I might help her, I fastened the shawl at her |
throat with a big safety-pin; but I must have been clumsy in my anxiety |
and pinched or pricked her with it, for by-and-by, when her breathing |
became quieter, she put her hand to her throat again and moaned. When I |
had her carefully wrapped up I put my shoes on her feet and then began |
very gently to wake her. At first she did not respond; but gradually she |
became more and more uneasy in her sleep, moaning and sighing |
occasionally. At last, as time was passing fast, and, for many other |
reasons, I wished to get her home at once, I shook her more forcibly, |
till finally she opened her eyes and awoke. She did not seem surprised |
to see me, as, of course, she did not realise all at once where she was. |
Lucy always wakes prettily, and even at such a time, when her body must |
have been chilled with cold, and her mind somewhat appalled at waking |
unclad in a churchyard at night, she did not lose her grace. She |
trembled a little, and clung to me; when I told her to come at once with |
me home she rose without a word, with the obedience of a child. As we |
passed along, the gravel hurt my feet, and Lucy noticed me wince. She |
stopped and wanted to insist upon my taking my shoes; but I would not. |
However, when we got to the pathway outside the churchyard, where there |
was a puddle of water, remaining from the storm, I daubed my feet with |
mud, using each foot in turn on the other, so that as we went home, no |
one, in case we should meet any one, should notice my bare feet. |
Fortune favoured us, and we got home without meeting a soul. Once we saw |
a man, who seemed not quite sober, passing along a street in front of |
us; but we hid in a door till he had disappeared up an opening such as |
there are here, steep little closes, or "wynds," as they call them in |
Scotland. My heart beat so loud all the time that sometimes I thought I |
should faint. I was filled with anxiety about Lucy, not only for her |
health, lest she should suffer from the exposure, but for her reputation |
in case the story should get wind. When we got in, and had washed our |
feet, and had said a prayer of thankfulness together, I tucked her into |
bed. Before falling asleep she asked--even implored--me not to say a |
word to any one, even her mother, about her sleep-walking adventure. I |
hesitated at first to promise; but on thinking of the state of her |
mother's health, and how the knowledge of such a thing would fret her, |
and thinking, too, of how such a story might become distorted--nay, |
infallibly would--in case it should leak out, I thought it wiser to do |
so. I hope I did right. I have locked the door, and the key is tied to |
my wrist, so perhaps I shall not be again disturbed. Lucy is sleeping |
soundly; the reflex of the dawn is high and far over the sea.... |
* * * * * |
_Same day, noon._--All goes well. Lucy slept till I woke her and seemed |
not to have even changed her side. The adventure of the night does not |
seem to have harmed her; on the contrary, it has benefited her, for she |
looks better this morning than she has done for weeks. I was sorry to |
notice that my clumsiness with the safety-pin hurt her. Indeed, it might |
have been serious, for the skin of her throat was pierced. I must have |
pinched up a piece of loose skin and have transfixed it, for there are |
two little red points like pin-pricks, and on the band of her nightdress |
was a drop of blood. When I apologised and was concerned about it, she |
laughed and petted me, and said she did not even feel it. Fortunately it |
cannot leave a scar, as it is so tiny. |
* * * * * |
_Same day, night._--We passed a happy day. The air was clear, and the |
sun bright, and there was a cool breeze. We took our lunch to Mulgrave |
Woods, Mrs. Westenra driving by the road and Lucy and I walking by the |
cliff-path and joining her at the gate. I felt a little sad myself, for |
I could not but feel how _absolutely_ happy it would have been had |
Jonathan been with me. But there! I must only be patient. In the evening |
we strolled in the Casino Terrace, and heard some good music by Spohr |
and Mackenzie, and went to bed early. Lucy seems more restful than she |
has been for some time, and fell asleep at once. I shall lock the door |
and secure the key the same as before, though I do not expect any |
trouble to-night. |
* * * * * |
_12 August._--My expectations were wrong, for twice during the night I |
was wakened by Lucy trying to get out. She seemed, even in her sleep, to |
be a little impatient at finding the door shut, and went back to bed |
under a sort of protest. I woke with the dawn, and heard the birds |
chirping outside of the window. Lucy woke, too, and, I was glad to see, |
was even better than on the previous morning. All her old gaiety of |
manner seemed to have come back, and she came and snuggled in beside me |
and told me all about Arthur. I told her how anxious I was about |
Jonathan, and then she tried to comfort me. Well, she succeeded |
somewhat, for, though sympathy can't alter facts, it can help to make |
them more bearable. |
* * * * * |
_13 August._--Another quiet day, and to bed with the key on my wrist as |
before. Again I awoke in the night, and found Lucy sitting up in bed, |
still asleep, pointing to the window. I got up quietly, and pulling |
aside the blind, looked out. It was brilliant moonlight, and the soft |
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