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constant and deep grief fills me with sympathy and compassion. He must |
have been a noble creature in his better days, being even now in wreck |
so attractive and amiable. |
I said in one of my letters, my dear Margaret, that I should find no friend |
on the wide ocean; yet I have found a man who, before his spirit had been |
broken by misery, I should have been happy to have possessed as the brother |
of my heart. |
I shall continue my journal concerning the stranger at intervals, |
should I have any fresh incidents to record. |
August 13th, 17—. |
My affection for my guest increases every day. He excites at once my |
admiration and my pity to an astonishing degree. How can I see so |
noble a creature destroyed by misery without feeling the most poignant |
grief? He is so gentle, yet so wise; his mind is so cultivated, and |
when he speaks, although his words are culled with the choicest art, |
yet they flow with rapidity and unparalleled eloquence. |
He is now much recovered from his illness and is continually on the deck, |
apparently watching for the sledge that preceded his own. Yet, although |
unhappy, he is not so utterly occupied by his own misery but that he |
interests himself deeply in the projects of others. He has frequently |
conversed with me on mine, which I have communicated to him without |
disguise. He entered attentively into all my arguments in favour of my |
eventual success and into every minute detail of the measures I had taken |
to secure it. I was easily led by the sympathy which he evinced to use the |
language of my heart, to give utterance to the burning ardour of my soul |
and to say, with all the fervour that warmed me, how gladly I would |
sacrifice my fortune, my existence, my every hope, to the furtherance of my |
enterprise. One man’s life or death were but a small price to pay for |
the acquirement of the knowledge which I sought, for the dominion I should |
acquire and transmit over the elemental foes of our race. As I spoke, a |
dark gloom spread over my listener’s countenance. At first I |
perceived that he tried to suppress his emotion; he placed his hands before |
his eyes, and my voice quivered and failed me as I beheld tears trickle |
fast from between his fingers; a groan burst from his heaving breast. I |
paused; at length he spoke, in broken accents: “Unhappy man! Do you |
share my madness? Have you drunk also of the intoxicating draught? Hear me; |
let me reveal my tale, and you will dash the cup from your lips!” |
Such words, you may imagine, strongly excited my curiosity; but the |
paroxysm of grief that had seized the stranger overcame his weakened |
powers, and many hours of repose and tranquil conversation were |
necessary to restore his composure. |
Having conquered the violence of his feelings, he appeared to despise |
himself for being the slave of passion; and quelling the dark tyranny of |
despair, he led me again to converse concerning myself personally. He asked |
me the history of my earlier years. The tale was quickly told, but it |
awakened various trains of reflection. I spoke of my desire of finding a |
friend, of my thirst for a more intimate sympathy with a fellow mind than |
had ever fallen to my lot, and expressed my conviction that a man could |
boast of little happiness who did not enjoy this blessing. |
“I agree with you,” replied the stranger; “we are |
unfashioned creatures, but half made up, if one wiser, better, dearer than |
ourselves—such a friend ought to be—do not lend his aid to |
perfectionate our weak and faulty natures. I once had a friend, the most |
noble of human creatures, and am entitled, therefore, to judge respecting |
friendship. You have hope, and the world before you, and have no cause for |
despair. But I—I have lost everything and cannot begin life |
anew.” |
As he said this his countenance became expressive of a calm, settled |
grief that touched me to the heart. But he was silent and presently |
retired to his cabin. |
Even broken in spirit as he is, no one can feel more deeply than he |
does the beauties of nature. The starry sky, the sea, and every sight |
afforded by these wonderful regions seem still to have the power of |
elevating his soul from earth. Such a man has a double existence: he |
may suffer misery and be overwhelmed by disappointments, yet when he |
has retired into himself, he will be like a celestial spirit that has a |
halo around him, within whose circle no grief or folly ventures. |
Will you smile at the enthusiasm I express concerning this divine |
wanderer? You would not if you saw him. You have been tutored and |
refined by books and retirement from the world, and you are therefore |
somewhat fastidious; but this only renders you the more fit to |
appreciate the extraordinary merits of this wonderful man. Sometimes I |
have endeavoured to discover what quality it is which he possesses that |
elevates him so immeasurably above any other person I ever knew. I |
believe it to be an intuitive discernment, a quick but never-failing |
power of judgment, a penetration into the causes of things, unequalled |
for clearness and precision; add to this a facility of expression and a |
voice whose varied intonations are soul-subduing music. |
August 19th, 17—. |
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