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*Werner Herzog voice* |
And so as he scraped the innards of his bulbous totem, in a futile attempt to purge its lining from ghastly tendrils, he realized that more strings were created with each pass of the serrated plastic scoop. |
Even the smooth metal spoon did not resolve this problem. Soon he would find out that the pumpkin was made entirely of strings. Its total being was composed of fibers, tightly wound together. In stark horror, he encountered the same realization that man has grappled with for eons: The horror of nature is total and ther... |
Watching Kamala Harris drone on with her nasal 75 IQ vapid Obamaspeak mystery meat woman vague safe inspiration office jargon over the past year as the storybook villain DEI Mammon of our era’s great narrative unfolding has made me realize something. |
It is not simply the bare facts of disenfranchisement that have spurned on young men to reject the gospel of globalism. It is not a simple equation of rejecting spiritual (and literal) castration. It is not merely the most basic reflex that occurs when quality of life, income, and opportunity become strangled into a pi... |
No. There is a deep gnawing urge in the heart of man for the delicious forbidden ambrosia of violence, conflict, strife, and turmoil which has dried up in the great drought of plenty. |
Humanity craves violence. Humanity benefits from the suffering of others. There is no ultimate utopia where we all have robots do everything, harvest anything we need from errant asteroids, and have AI reduce all of our struggles into aimless Star Trek creative renaissance pursuits of discovery and knowledge. |
We thirst for blood. We desire an enemy. We need to step on others to climb higher. There will always be a greater and a lesser. There will always be a nemesis. There will always be a monster to slay, a land to conquer, a deluge to withstand, an conquered to subjugate. There will always be the fundamental force of natu... |
There is an inquisition being held under a neon lit gold glitter cursive slogan embedded in a wall of fake leaves, centered on a high ceiling white wall. Bruno Mars plays quietly on an auxed iPhone, nestled beneath a tip tablet next to pink thermos filled with tap water. It is an office lobby labyrinth haunted by the s... |
The inherent femininity of it is itself a red herring, women are simply wielded as its vanguard like captured outskirt villagers being forced by a Mongolian horde to beset upon their own relatives entrenched in a sieged desert palace somewhere in Khwarezm. Your own people, suffering the impalement of arrows by your han... |
I have seen the glee and fervor in the faces of a rabid mob. I know what excites you people. I know the right flavor of flesh to spurn the disenfranchised into a ravenous frenzy. It is the promise of blood. It is the great disruption of Nothing into a grand terrifying Something. It is true Change, change being the grea... |
Change is the crucible of chaos which reduces all satisfied desire into desperate needs, needs which define purpose and allow for the genuine development of culture through necessity. It is the musical chairs of death, disease, and destruction, a loud violent tunnel with a light at the end promising its survivors a cha... |
You can admit you crave it. |
One trillion Jira pushes per second directly beamed into my cornea. |
Quantum Entanglement Communicator work gc has me answering queries from civilizations that don’t exist yet. |
Our company doesn’t have new verticals, we have several higher dimensional orthogonal directions. |
Beaming PowerPoint presentations back in time via caveman shamanic hallucinations to invent language and geometry. |
Sophonic managerial hierarchy, I answer to sentient quasars, they report to protons. |
HR meetings with God. |
DNA ingrained self resolving IT tickets. |
We work hard, we play hard, hard play work we, playardorkwe, Rpwedgh, H, •, ∞ |
The giant autonomous perfect edge floating metal cube has been stealing lunches out of the fridge. |
“Remote” work in the astral plane. |
Seed round in the Akashic Records. |
Dyson sphere overclocking tips the Continuum Council does NOT want you to know! |
There is a black hole generator nestled between the 18 limb pedals of my Peloton. |
White collar prison crystal matrix. |
For some reason we still haven’t moved off Windows 7. |
Experience death to birth lifecycle in reverse during new hire orientation. |
Palladium lined magnetic field crucible filled with liquid plasma with the phrase “Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my Liquid Plasma” laser etched onto the side. |
Crunch sprint has us harvesting the consciousness of distant Type One Kardashev civilizations through UberEats. |
Noneuclidian phase shifting corner office only exists three days out of the week. |
We just shifted multiple universes into one coherent reality this quarter and yet I still have to wear this gay ass lanyard whenever I’m in the building. |
For your Christmas bonus this year you’re allowed to have a new emotion. |
Zoom calls in the fourth dimension so we can get every single one we’ve ever had and every single one we’ll ever have out of the way at once. |
Sexual harassment staff seminar because someone made eye contact. |
Federal audit triggered because someone thought about the future. |
“As per my last hivemind meld-“ |
Token unmodified biological flesh hire |
A day in the 1e-(100000^100000)HL. |
One of Donald Trump's most iconic aesthetic motifs is his love of McDonald's. Besides the name matching to such a degree that he mantles his identity onto a pseudo mascot for the brand, Trump's love of McDonald's also exemplifies an inherent patriotism which is far more genuine than anything prior presidents could poss... |
Donald Trump's unabashed enthusiasm for McDonald's is an authentic embodiment of American values which exceeds the sincerity of possibly any president within the past 200 years. |
McDonald's is arguably the most relevant symbol of American culture and identity, exceeding that of apple pies, baseball, firearms, bald eagles, and the flag itself. The burger is the ultimate American symbol, a perfect coalescence of the entire food pyramid, an archetypical recipe structure mimicked by nearly every cu... |
Of all burgers, the most quintessential burger is the McDonald's burger. Depending on the nation, this may be the iconic Big Mac, the legendary McDouble, or a number of other creative or hideous country specific concoctions. McDonald's is globally ubiquitous. Nearly every country has a McDonald's. Every McDonald's is l... |
Contemporary commentators criticize Trump's shameless love of McDonald's as a staple of tackiness, but it is through this love that Trump establishes himself as a sincere American. He truly embraces America in its purest form every time he orders McDonald's or wields it in front of the American populace. He fully dives... |
The United States was built on a foundation of capitalistic venture. Its first Spanish colonists in St. Augustine were in search of gold, land, and expansion. Its first English colony in Jamestown was an all male contingent of enterprisers, accountants, lawyers, and gentleman mixed with a minority of laborers and worke... |
McDonald's itself is a testament to capitalistic ambition. Much like the pioneers of Manifest Destiny and cutthroat Robber Barons carving out an empire through the underutilized bounty of the West, Ray Kroc usurped the hyperefficient family oriented restaurant model created by the McDonald's brothers in the 1950s and t... |
McDonald's represents capitalism in its purest form. Much like the generic corporate delivery pizza represents what constitutes the platonic ideal of what a pizza should be (much to the chagrin of pretentious gastronomes, uppity New Yorkers, and indignant Italians), McDonald's has mastered what a burger should be, for ... |
McDonald's is a litmus for the health of the nation itself. Its current status as cheap unhealthy slop is half psychosomatic and half genuine due to seed oil cooked fries, processed cheese, and some chemical preservatives in the buns. This is simply a mirror for the civilization in which the McDonald's burger exists. W... |
McDonald's is a perfect pillar of direct assessment for the value of our currency. The price of Big Mac is used to track inflation, both on a national and global scale across decades of time. McDonald's represents America's economic presence so consistently that no two nations which host McDonald's franchises may ever ... |
McDonald's itself will continue to exist long after America, continuing its empiric presence through the changing of names, titles, leadership, and populace. |
There is a McDonald's in the Pentagon. |
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