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cattle die in thousands, and so do these small, winged cattle, unless they are carefully fed, or removed to other pastures. The year will long be remembered as exceptionally rainless and distressing. Scarcely a flower bloomed on the dry valleys away from the stream-sides, and not a single grain-field depending upon rain was reaped. The seed only sprouted, came up
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a little way, and withered. Horses, cattle, and sheep grew thinner day by day, nibbling at bushes and weeds, along the shallowing edges of streams, many of which were dried up altogether, for the first time since the settlement of the country. [Illustration: A BEE-RANCH ON A SPUR OF THE SAN GABRIEL RANGE. CARDINAL FLOWER.] In the course of a
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trip I made during the summer of that year through Monterey, San Luis Obispo, Santa Barbara, Ventura, and Los Angeles counties, the deplorable effects of the drought were everywhere visibleleafless fields, dead and dying cattle, dead bees, and half-dead people with dusty, doleful faces. Even the birds and squirrels were in distress, though their suffering was less painfully apparent than
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that of the poor cattle. These were falling one by one in slow, sure starvation along the banks of the hot, sluggish streams, while thousands of buzzards correspondingly fat were sailing above them, or standing gorged on the ground beneath the trees, waiting with easy faith for fresh carcasses. The quails, prudently considering the hard times, abandoned all thought of
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pairing. They were too poor to marry, and so continued in flocks all through the year without attempting to rear young. The ground-squirrels, though an exceptionally industrious and enterprising race, as every farmer knows, were hard pushed for a living; not a fresh leaf or seed was to be found save in the trees, whose bossy masses of dark green
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foliage presented a striking contrast to the ashen baldness of the ground beneath them. The squirrels, leaving their accustomed feeding-grounds, betook themselves to the leafy oaks to gnaw out the acorn stores of the provident woodpeckers, but the latter kept up a vigilant watch upon their movements. I noticed four woodpeckers in league against one squirrel, driving the poor fellow
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out of an oak that they claimed. He dodged round the knotty trunk from side to side, as nimbly as he could in his famished condition, only to find a sharp bill everywhere. But the fate of the bees that year seemed the saddest of all. In different portions of Los Angeles and San Diego counties, from one half to
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three fourths of them died of sheer starvation. Not less than , colonies perished in these two counties alone, while in the adjacent counties the death-rate was hardly less. [Illustration: WILD BUCKWHEAT.A BEE RANCH IN THE WILDERNESS.] Even the colonies nearest to the mountains suffered this year, for the smaller vegetation on the foot-hills was affected by the drought almost
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as severely as that of the valleys and plains, and even the hardy, deep-rooted chaparral, the surest dependence of the bees, bloomed sparingly, while much of it was beyond reach. Every swarm could have been saved, however, by promptly supplying them with food when their own stores began to fail, and before they became enfeebled and discouraged; or by cutting
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roads back into the mountains, and taking them into the heart of the flowery chaparral. The Santa Lucia, San Rafael, San Gabriel, San Jacinto, and San Bernardino ranges are almost untouched as yet save by the wild bees. Some idea of their resources, and of the advantages and disadvantages they offer to bee-keepers, may be formed from an excursion that
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I made into the San Gabriel Range about the beginning of August of the dry year. This range, containing most of the characteristic features of the other ranges just mentioned, overlooks the Los Angeles vineyards and orange groves from the north, and is more rigidly inaccessible in the ordinary meaning of the word than any other that I ever attempted
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to penetrate. The slopes are exceptionally steep and insecure to the foot, and they are covered with thorny bushes from five to ten feet high. With the exception of little spots not visible in general views, the entire surface is covered with them, massed in close hedge growth, sweeping gracefully down into every gorge and hollow, and swelling over every
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ridge and summit in shaggy, ungovernable exuberance, offering more honey to the acre for half the year than the most crowded clover-field. But when beheld from the open San Gabriel Valley, beaten with dry sunshine, all that was seen of the range seemed to wear a forbidding aspect. From base to summit all seemed gray, barren, silent, its glorious chaparral
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appearing like dry moss creeping over its dull, wrinkled ridges and hollows. Setting out from Pasadena, I reached the foot of the range about sundown; and being weary and heated with my walk across the shadeless valley, concluded to camp for the night. After resting a few moments, I began to look about among the flood-boulders of Eaton Creek for
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a camp-ground, when I came upon a strange, dark-looking man who had been chopping cord-wood. He seemed surprised at seeing me, so I sat down with him on the live-oak log he had been cutting, and made haste to give a reason for my appearance in his solitude, explaining that I was anxious to find out something about the mountains,
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and meant to make my way up Eaton Creek next morning. Then he kindly invited me to camp with him, and led me to his little cabin, situated at the foot of the mountains, where a small spring oozes out of a bank overgrown with wild-rose bushes. After supper, when the daylight was gone, he explained that he was out
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of candles; so we sat in the dark, while he gave me a sketch of his life in a mixture of Spanish and English. He was born in Mexico, his father Irish, his mother Spanish. He had been a miner, rancher, prospector, hunter, etc., rambling always, and wearing his life away in mere waste; but now he was going to
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settle down. His past life, he said, was of no account, but the future was promising. He was going to make money and marry a Spanish woman. People mine here for water as for gold. He had been running a tunnel into a spur of the mountain back of his cabin. My prospect is good, he said, and if I
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chance to strike a good, strong flow, Ill soon be worth $ or $,. For that flat out there, referring to a small, irregular patch of bouldery detritus, two or three acres in size, that had been deposited by Eaton Creek during some flood season,that flat is large enough for a nice orange-grove, and the bank behind the cabin will
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do for a vineyard, and after watering my own trees and vines I will have some water left to sell to my neighbors below me, down the valley. And then, he continued, I can keep bees, and make money that way, too, for the mountains above here are just full of honey in the summer-time, and one of my neighbors
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down here says that he will let me have a whole lot of hives, on shares, to start with. You see Ive a good thing; Im all right now. All this prospective affluence in the sunken, boulder-choked flood-bed of a mountain-stream! Leaving the bees out of the count, most fortune-seekers would as soon think of settling on the summit of
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Mount Shasta. Next morning, wishing my hopeful entertainer good luck, I set out on my shaggy excursion. [Illustration: A BEE-PASTURE ON THE MORAINE DESERT, SPANISH BAYONET.] About half an hours walk above the cabin, I came to The Fall, famous throughout the valley settlements as the finest yet discovered in the San Gabriel Mountains. It is a charming little thing,
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with a low, sweet voice, singing like a bird, as it pours from a notch in a short ledge, some thirty-five or forty feet into a round mirror-pool. The face of the cliff back of it, and on both sides, is smoothly covered and embossed with mosses, against which the white water shines out in showy relief, like a silver
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instrument in a velvet case. Hither come the San Gabriel lads and lassies, to gather ferns and dabble away their hot holidays in the cool water, glad to escape from their commonplace palm-gardens and orange-groves. The delicate maidenhair grows on fissured rocks within reach of the spray, while broad-leaved maples and sycamores cast soft, mellow shade over a rich profusion
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of bee-flowers, growing among boulders in front of the poolthe fall, the flowers, the bees, the ferny rocks, and leafy shade forming a charming little poem of wildness, the last of a series extending down the flowery slopes of Mount San Antonio through the rugged, foam-beaten bosses of the main Eaton Canon. From the base of the fall I followed
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the ridge that forms the western rim of the Eaton basin to the summit of one of the principal peaks, which is about feet above sea-level. Then, turning eastward, I crossed the middle of the basin, forcing a way over its many subordinate ridges and across its eastern rim, having to contend almost everywhere with the floweriest and most impenetrable
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growth of honey-bushes I had ever encountered since first my mountaineering began. Most of the Shasta chaparral is leafy nearly to the ground; here the main stems are naked for three or four feet, and interspiked with dead twigs, forming a stiff _chevaux de frise_ through which even the bears make their way with difficulty. I was compelled to creep
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for miles on all fours, and in following the bear-trails often found tufts of hair on the bushes where they had forced themselves through. For feet or so above the fall the ascent was made possible only by tough cushions of club-moss that clung to the rock. Above this the ridge weathers away to a thin knife-blade for a few
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hundred yards, and thence to the summit of the range it carries a bristly mane of chaparral. Here and there small openings occur on rocky places, commanding fine views across the cultivated valley to the ocean. These I found by the tracks were favorite outlooks and resting-places for the wild animalsbears, wolves, foxes, wildcats, etc.which abound here, and would have
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to be taken into account in the establishment of bee-ranches. In the deepest thickets I found wood-rat villagesgroups of huts four to six feet high, built of sticks and leaves in rough, tapering piles, like musk-rat cabins. I noticed a good many bees, too, most of them wild. The tame honey-bees seemed languid and wing-weary, as if they had come
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all the way up from the flowerless valley. After reaching the summit I had time to make only a hasty survey of the basin, now glowing in the sunset gold, before hastening down into one of the tributary caons in search, of water. Emerging from a particularly tedious breadth of chaparral, I found myself free and erect in a beautiful
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park-like grove of Mountain Live Oak, where the ground was planted with aspidiums and brier-roses, while the glossy foliage made a close canopy overhead, leaving the gray dividing trunks bare to show the beauty of their interlacing arches. The bottom of the caon was dry where I first reached it, but a bunch of scarlet mimulus indicated water at no
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great distance, and I soon discovered about a bucketful in a hollow of the rock. This, however, was full of dead bees, wasps, beetles, and leaves, well steeped and simmered, and would, therefore, require boiling and filtering through fresh charcoal before it could be made available. Tracing the dry channel about a mile farther down to its junction with a
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larger tributary caon, I at length discovered a lot of boulder pools, clear as crystal, brimming full, and linked together by glistening streamlets just strong enough to sing audibly. Flowers in full bloom adorned their margins, lilies ten feet high, larkspur, columbines, and luxuriant ferns, leaning and overarching in lavish abundance, while a noble old Live Oak spread its rugged
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arms over all. Here I camped, making my bed on smooth cobblestones. [Illustration: A BEE-KEEPERS CABIN.BURRIELIA (ABOVE).MADIA (BELOW).] Next day, in the channel of a tributary that heads on Mount San Antonio, I passed about fifteen or twenty gardens like the one in which I sleptlilies in every one of them, in the full pomp of bloom. My third camp
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was made near the middle of the general basin, at the head of a long system of cascades from ten to feet high, one following the other in close succession down a rocky, inaccessible caon, making a total descent of nearly feet. Above the cascades the main stream passes through a series of open, sunny levels, the largest of which
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are about an acre in size, where the wild bees and their companions were feasting on a showy growth of zauschneria, painted cups, and monardella; and gray squirrels were busy harvesting the burs of the Douglas Spruce, the only conifer I met in the basin. The eastern slopes of the basin are in every way similar to those we have
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described, and the same may be said of other portions of the range. From the highest summit, far as the eye could reach, the landscape was one vast bee-pasture, a rolling wilderness of honey-bloom, scarcely broken by bits of forest or the rocky outcrops of hilltops and ridges. Behind the San Bernardino Range lies the wild sage-brush country, bounded on
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the east by the Colorado River, and extending in a general northerly direction to Nevada and along the eastern base of the Sierra beyond Mono Lake. The greater portion of this immense region, including Owens Valley, Death Valley, and the Sink of the Mohave, the area of which is nearly one fifth that of the entire State, is usually regarded
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as a desert, not because of any lack in the soil, but for want of rain, and rivers available for irrigation. Very little of it, however, is desert in the eyes of a bee. Looking now over all the available pastures of California, it appears that the business of beekeeping is still in its infancy. Even in the more enterprising
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of the southern counties, where so vigorous a beginning has been made, less than a tenth of their honey resources have as yet been developed; while in the Great Plain, the Coast Ranges, the Sierra Nevada, and the northern region about Mount Shasta, the business can hardly be said to exist at all. What the limits of its developments in
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the future may be, with the advantages of cheaper transportation and the invention of better methods in general, it is not easy to guess. Nor, on the other hand, are we able to measure the influence on bee interests likely to follow the destruction of the forests, now rapidly falling before fire and the ax. As to the sheep evil,
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that can hardly become greater than it is at the present day. In short, notwithstanding the wide-spread deterioration and destruction of every kind already effected, California, with her incomparable climate and flora, is still, as far as I know, the best of all the bee-lands of the world. [] Fifteen hives of Italian bees were introduced into Los Angeles County
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Produced by Joshua Hutchinson, Steve Schulze and PG Distributed Proofreaders +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | CONANT'S | | | | PATENT BINDERS | | | | FOR | | | | "PUNCHINELLO," | | | | to preserve the paper for binding, will be sent, post-paid, | | on receipt of One Dollar, by | | | | PUNCHINELLO PUBLISHING CO.,
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| | | | Nassau Street, New-York City. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | TO NEWS-DEALERS. | | | | PUNCHINELLO'S MONTHLY. | | THE FIVE NUMBERS FOR APRIL | | Bound in a Handsome Cover, | | IS NOW READY. Price Fifty Cents. | | | | THE TRADE | | SUPPLIED BY THE | | AMERICAN NEWS
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the following grades, as being better suited for | | business purposes than any Pen manufactured. The | | | | "," "," and the "Anti-Corrosive," | | | | We recommend for bank and office use. | | | | D. APPLETON & CO., | | | | _Sole Agents for United States._ | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ Vol. .
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No. . PUNCHINELLO SATURDAY, MAY , . PUBLISHED BY THE PUNCHINELLO PUBLISHING COMPANY, NASSAU STREET, NEW-YORK. * * * * * _Will Shortly appear: Our New Serial, Written expressly for Punchinello, by ORPHEUS C. KERR, Entitled, "The Mystery of Mr. E. Drood." To be continued weekly during this year._ +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | APPLICATIONS FOR ADVERTISING IN | | |
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| "PUNCHINELLO" | | | | SHOULD BE ADDRESSED TO | | | | J. NICKINSON, | | | | Room No. , | | | | NASSAU STREET. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | Notice to Ladies. | | | | DIBBLEE, | | | | Of Broadway, | | | | Has just received a large assortment
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of all the latest | | styles of Chignons, Chatelaines, etc., | | | | FROM PARIS. | | | | Comprising the following beautiful varieties: | | | | La Coquette, La Plenitude, La Bouquet, La Sirene, | | L'Imperatrice etc., | | | | At prices varying from $ upward. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | AGENTS
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WANTED | | | | In every town, county, and State, to canvass for HENRY WARD | | BEECHER'S great weekly paper, with which is GIVEN AWAY that | | superb and world-renowned work of art, "_Marshall's | | Household Engraving of Washington_." The best paper and the | | grandest engraving In America. Agents report "making $ in |
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| half a day." "Sales easier than books, and profits greater." | | Ladies or gentlemen desiring immediate or largely | | remunerative employment should apply at once. Book | | canvassers, and all soliciting agents will find more money | | in this than in anything else. It is something _entirely | | new_, being an _unprecedented combination_ and
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very taking. | | Send for circular and terms to | | | | J. B. FORD & CO., Publishers, | | | | Park Row, New-York. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | PHELAN & COLLENDER, | | | | MANUFACTURERS OF | | | | Standard American Billiard Tables. | | | | WAREROOMS AND OFFICE, | |
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| | BROADWAY, NEW-YORK. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | GEO. B. BOWLEND, | | | | DRAUGHTSMAN AND DESIGNER, | | | | FULTON STREET, | | | | Room No. . | | | | NEW-YORK. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | WEVILL & HAMMAR, | | | | Wood Engravers, | | | | No.
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BROADWAY, | | | | NEW-YORK. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | Thomas J. Rayner & Co., | | | | LIBERTY STREET, | | | | New-York, | | | | MANUFACTURERS OF THE | | | | _Finest Cigars made in the United States._ | | | | | | All sizes and styles. Prices very moderate.
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Samples sent to | | any responsible house. Also importers of the | | | | _"FUSBOS" BRAND,_ | | | | Equal in quality to the best of the Havana market, and from | | ten to twenty per cent cheaper. | | | | Restaurant, Bar, Hotel, and Saloon trade will save money by | | calling at
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| | | | LIBERTY STREET. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | HERCULES MUTUAL | | | | LIFE ASSURANCE | | | | SOCIETY | | | | OF THE UNITED STATES. | | | | No. Broadway, New-York. | | | | POLICIES NON-FORFEITABLE. | | | | All Policies | | Entitled to Participation in Profits.
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| | Dividends Declared Annually. | | | | JAMES D. REYMERT, President. | | | | ASHER S. MILLS, Secretary. | | | | THOMAS H. WHITE. M.D., Medical Examiner. | | | | ACTIVE AGENTS WANTED. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | PUNCHINELLO. | | | | With a large and varied experience in the management and
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| | publication of a paper of the class herewith submitted, and | | with the still more positive advantage of an Ample Capital | | to justify the undertaking, the | | | | PUNCHINELLO PUBLISHING CO. | | | | OF THE CITY OF NEW-YORK, | | | | Presents to the public for approval, the | |
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| | NEW ILLUSTRATED HUMOROUS AND SATIRICAL | | | | WEEKLY PAPER, | | | | PUNCHINELLO, | | | | The first number of which was issued under date of April . | | | | PUNCHINELLO will be entirely original; humorous and witty | | without vulgarity, and satirical without malice. It will be | | printed
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on a superior tinted paper of sixteen pages, size | | by , and will be for sale by all respectable newsdealers | | who have the judgment to know a good thing when they see it, | | or by subscription from this office. | | | | ORIGINAL ARTICLES, | | | | Suitable for the paper, and
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Original Designs, or suggestive | | ideas or sketches for illustrations, upon the topics of the | | day, are always acceptable, and will be paid for liberally. | | | | Terms: | | | | One copy, per year, in advance ....................... $. | | | | Single copies, ten cents. | | | | A specimen copy
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will be mailed free upon the receipt of ten | | cents. | | | | One copy, with the Riverside Magazine, or any other magazine | | or paper, price, $., for ......................... . | | | | One copy, with any magazine or paper, price, $, for .. . | | | | All communications, remittances, etc., to
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be addressed to | | | | PUNCHINELLO PUBLISHING CO., | | | | No. Nassau Street, | | | | NEW-YORK | | | | P.O. Box, . | | | | (_For terms to Clubs, see 16th page_.) | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | Mercantile Library, | | | | Clinton Hall, Astor Place, | | |
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| NEW-YORK. | | | | This is now the largest circulating Library in America, the | | number of volumes on its shelves being ,. About | | volumes are added each month; and very large purchases | | are made of all new and popular works. | | | |Books are delivered at members' residences for five cents
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each| | delivery. | | | | | | TERMS OF MEMBERSHIP: | | | | TO CLERKS, | | | | $ Initiation, $ Annual Dues. | | | | TO OTHERS, $ a year. | | | | SUBSCRIPTIONS TAKEN FOR | | SIX MONTHS. | | | | BRANCH OFFICES | | | | AT | |
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| | NO. CEDAR STREET, NEW-YORK, | | | | AND AT | | | | Yonkers, Norwalk, Stamford, and Elizabeth. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | AMERICAN | | | | BUTTONHOLE, OVERSEAMING, | | | | AND | | | | SEWING-MACHINE CO., | | | | and Broadway, New-York. | | | | This great combination
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machine is the last and greatest | | Improvement on all former machines, making, in addition to | | all the work done on best Lock-Stitch machines, beautiful | | | | BUTTON AND EYELET HOLES. | | | | in all fabrics. | | | | Machine, with finely finished | | | | OILED WALNUT TABLE AND COVER
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| | | | complete, $. Same machine, without the buttonhole parts, | | $. This last is beyond all question the simplest, easiest | | to manage and to keep in order, of any machine in the | | market. Machines warranted, and full instruction given to | | purchasers. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | HENRY SPEAR,
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PRINTER, | | | | LITHOGRAPHER, | | | | STATIONER. | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ | | | J. NICKINSON | | | | begs to announce to the friends of | | | | "PUNCHINELLO" | | | | residing in the country, that, for their convenience, he has | | made arrangements by which, on receipt of the
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price of | | | | ANY STANDARD BOOK PUBLISHED, | | | | the same will be forwarded, postage paid. | | | | Parties desiring Catalogues of any of our Publishing Houses | | can have the same forwarded by inclosing two stamps. | | | | OFFICE OF | | | | PUNCHINELLO PUBLISHING CO. | |
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| | Nassau Street. | | | | [P.O. Box .] | | | +--------------------------------------------------------------+ * * * * * [Illustration: AT THE MERCANTILE LIBRARY. _Mr. Nottmuch_, (to Clerk in Library.) "I SEE BY YOUR CIRCULAR THAT VISITORS OF DISTINCTION HAVE FREE ACCESS TO YOUR READING-ROOM, AND AS I HAVE CONTRIBUTED A STORY TO THE 'WAYERLY MAGAZINE,'" etc. _Nottmuch_, (having
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obtained access to the reading-room.) "A VERY PRETTY GIRL, THAT SUPERINTENDENT! HAS SHE PERUSED MY STORY, OR DO I DAZZLE HER WITH MY LOOKS? HA! SHE RISES!----." _Lady Superintendent_. (blandly but firmly). "EXCUSE ME, SIR, BUT IT'S AGAINST THE RULES FOR GENTLEMEN TO PLACE THEIR FEET ON CHAIRS."] * * * * * HIGH NOTES BY OUR MUSICAL CRITIC. PUNCHINELLO'S
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critic, always the friend of fair-play, resents the insinuation that Mr. CARL ROSA has been a careless director of Opera. The truth is that Mr. ROSA has not produced the smallest work without a great deal of Preparation. FLOTOW'S _Shadow_ is to be brought out in London. It will not stand the ghost of a chance unless well mounted. Music
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light and sketchy; remarkable for a Chorus of Fishermen, well known as the "Shad oh! song." _Lohengrin_ has had a run of eight nights at Brussels, with average receipts of little less than four thousand francs. This sort of tune is the only one in the music of the Future which managers can understand. Nevertheless Herr WAGNER is not out
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of spirits. Intent upon laying the foundations of future wealth and fame, he can lay Low and Grin. Brussels gold will serve him as well as _Rheingold_. The difference between BACH'S music find a music-box is yet an unsettled conundrum. Such is likely to be the fate of the question raised with so much temper over the Passion Music of
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that great man by the English critics. Shame on all critics that condemn MOZART as a fogy and BACH as a nuisance. Of course it is going back on BACH with a vengeance, but what sympathy can exist between the old fuguemakers and the modern high-flyers? * * * * * LATEST NEWS ITEMS. A SHEFFIELD paper has been prosecuted
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for asserting that the Prince of Wales was a fast young man. The prosecution was withdrawn as soon as the editor confessed that the Prince was loose. The Treasury Department is much distressed by the great genius for smuggling displayed by the Chinese immigrants. They secrete opium in all sorts of wonderful places, and so worry the custom-house officers dreadfully.
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Several children have been arrested for bringing their "poppies" over with them, and feeling in favor of the offenders ran so high that a number of women were fined for having a share in laud'n'm. The bull fights in London have come to a mournful conclusion. The bulls refused to take part, and the principal combatant instead of being all
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Matted O'er with the blood of his taurine victims, has been sent to prison for trying to Pick a Door lock. The Last of the Piegans is travelling East, on his way to Philadelphia, to see "SHERIDAN'S Ride." He was away from home when PHILIP was there, and is very anxious to know the young man when he sees him
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again. Hence his laudable anxiety to study the picture. The Fenian Army. If the Fenians send an army to aid the Red river insurgents, it may probably be the only "BIEL" work they will attempt this year. * * * * * Entered, according to Act of Congress, in the year , by the PUNCHINELLO PUBLISHING COMPANY, in the Clerk's
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Office of the District Court of the United States, for the Southern District of New York. * * * * * WHAT I KNOW ABOUT PROTECTION. DEAR PUNCHINELLO: Having skilfully illuminated Free Trade, I now proceed to elucidate Protection. You see when we reach Protection, the boot is on the other leg; _you_ make the conundrums then, and the other
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man tries to guess them. There are many kinds of protection; there's the kind which a State's prison-keeper gives to one of his birds; the kind which a black-and-tan terrier, or a freshly-imported Chinaman, extends to a good fat rat; the kind which a pious young man offers to a fair and tender damsel, when he places his arm around
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her dainty waist, and gently absorbs the dew of innocence from her rosy lips, (that idea, is, I think, plagiarized from TENNYSON,) and the kind which a delicate mother-in-law, blessed with nerves, pours out upon her son-in-law. But I leave the discussion of such things to weaker birds, and soar myself to a higher kind, _i.e._, that Protection which is
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diametrically opposed to Free Trade. Protection, in this sense, is--well, let me follow my own admirable example, and illustrate: You own a coal mine in Pennsylvania, which contains tolerably poor coal, with which you mix a proper amount of stone, and then sell the mixture for a high price. ICHABOD BLUE-NOSE owns a coal mine in Nova Scotia, which furnishes
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good coal; he puts no slate in it, and yet sells it at a low figure. You reflect that with such opposition you will never manage to dispose of all your stone, so you apply to Congress, and have a high tariff put on coal. That's Protection. Metaphysically defined, Protection is the natural right, inherent in every American citizen, to
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obtain money in large quantities for goods of small qualities. Protection is not a natural production; it was invented about the time taxes were, though it must be admitted that those very annoying articles appeared very early in the history of the human race. I've no doubt that ADAM levied taxes, though it's very doubtful if he could put as
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many things in a tax levy as a New York politician can. Certainly there was a very high tariff on apples in his day--so high that humanity has not yet succeeded in paying off the duty on the one ADAM ate. ABRAHAM paid taxes, and, as he was his own Senate and House, doubtless he passed a tariff bill to
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suit himself, and had any quantity of Protection. I have always regretted that NOAH didn't pass a bill protecting native industry, because he could have enforced it, and had no wrangling about it. There are one or two points about Protection which a wayfaring man, even if people labor under the impression that he is a fool, can understand. If
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you are JOHN SMITH and own a coal mine or an iron mill, you go to Washington, see your Congressman, (by see I mean look at him, of course,) donate large sums of money to certain poor, but honest men, who adorn the lobby of the House, while they are waiting for generous patrons like unto you, then go home
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and calmly await the result. Your representative makes a speech, the exordium of which is Patriotism, the peroration of which is Star-Spangled Banner, and the central plum of which is your coal mine or iron mill. Your poor and honest friends wear out several pairs of shoes, the tariff bill is passed, your mine or mill is abundantly protected, and
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the country is saved. If, on the other hand, you are JOHN BROWN, and raise cabbages and turnips on a farm, you are allowed to pay high prices for SMITH'S coal or iron, but you expect no Protection, and you've a sure thing of getting what you expect. Of course you don't imagine that I shall explain the details of
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this profound subject. There are only two men in this country who think they can do that, and each one of those says that the other is an idiot. As a rule, figures can't lie; but look out for the exceptions when you run across the subject of Protection. The very same figures have an ugly way of proving both
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sides of a question. You run down a fact, and think you've got it, but, before you know it, it has slipped, like the "little joker," over to the other side. Personally, I am a Protectionist. Formerly I indulged in that monstrous absurdity, Free Trade, but then I was an importer; now, being a manufacturer, the scales have fallen from
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my eyes, and I am of the straitest sect a Protectionist. You can't give me too much of it. Of course I can't see why pig-iron should be protected, and pigs not. I think every native production should be cared for, and that there should be an excessively high tariff on foreign food. In that case poor REVERDY JOHNSON would
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have been compelled to have passed a Lenten season at Halifax, until he had eradicated from his system the rich English dinners, before he could have entered this favored land. And MOTLEY--bless me, he has eaten so much that I don't believe he could get it out of his body if he fasted for the remainder of his natural life.
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I am informed, however, that Protection does us one injury. All the _World_ says that there is a Parsee in our land, who is loaded with rupees, but who is unable to spend them here because of our protective system, and what all the _World_ says, you know, must be true. However, there are ,, of us, and, if Congress
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will make all Americans buy my patent door-knobs, the Parsee can go to--Hindostan. I don't think any thing more can be said about Protection. Any body who doesn't understand it now had better go to Washington, and listen to the debate on scrap-iron. That will sharpen his wits. Pig-iron, of course, is interesting, but then that's a light and airy
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subject. Hear the debate on scrap-iron, by all means. LOT. * * * * * A LITERARY VAMPIRE. No greater mistake was ever made than the supposition that PUNCHINELLO is to be assailed with impunity by rival publications. It is well known that he never courted controversies or quarrels, and his best friends understand perfectly his love for a peaceable
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career. But when that flippant sheet, known as _Rees's American Encyclopedia_, comes out with a violent attack upon PUNCHINELLO'S past life and present course, the assault is such as would provoke a retort from any honest man. The vile insinuation that PUNCHINELLO is printed and published for the sole purpose of making money out of its subscribers and the reading
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