prompt stringlengths 20 5.8k | chosen_story stringlengths 226 10k | rejected_story stringlengths 227 9.43k | chosen_timestamp timestamp[ns]date 2012-07-26 17:01:55 2022-12-31 14:34:19 | rejected_timestamp timestamp[ns]date 2012-07-26 14:23:36 2022-12-31 12:20:41 | chosen_upvotes int64 14 23.1k | rejected_upvotes int64 10 4.26k |
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[WP] “Moon’s haunted.” | When our colony’s air supply failed, and Mission Control executed an emergency recall for all personnel, we didn’t spare a thought for the things we left behind—our clothes, our uneaten freeze-dried food, our memories. We backed up all video logs and audio recordings, beamed them back to Earth.
But how do you archi... | A cold wind blew through the lander as soon as it made touchdown. That was a problem, because it couldn't have been possible.
All the obvious solutions were ruled out one by one. The engine's cryo lines didn't have any holes, because we were all still alive, and the life support system was operating at 105% throughou... | 2020-05-07T21:52:46 | 2020-05-07T21:33:37 | 23 | 12 |
[WP] You wield a sword that gets sharper the greater the knowledge you tell it. A common known fact dulls the sword while knowledge only a few know sharpens it. | >"One plus one is two."
The blade glowed bright blue and became infinitely dull, nearly flat. Cool.
>"How about this, my favorite color is green."
The blade gleamed a bright red and became sharper than a razor. Not a super important fact, but even if everyone he knew was aware of his favorite color, there... | "what do you mean the sword can't tell?"
Cal leaned in closer. The mix of confusion and rage on his face made victory only that much sweeter. Yu grinned a little wider.
"What's the sword going to do? Walk off and fact check everything I tell it?"
"Yes! I mean. I ASSUME it has some kind of.."
"Exactly!" Yu cut in ... | 2021-12-01T11:26:44 | 2021-12-01T10:09:16 | 68 | 23 |
[WP] On a dare, you've prank called the local police, telling them there's a demon outside. Their answer: "We know. Stay inside. There's help on the way." | We stare at each other, dumbfounded. The phone is still on the coffee table, and we can see that the police ended the call. Did we just get counter-pranked? Rita's the first to react.
"That was... weird. Was that a joke?"
"It had to be."
"But can they do that? Can they joke like that in these calls?"
"I guess so. I... | You hang up, shaking. Your little brother looks up at you, with a little smile on his face. "Well, what did they say? Are they going to send someone over? Man, cops are so dumb!" You look down at him, your mouth opening and closing like a fish, but no sounds come out. Suddenly, there is a knock at the front door. Your ... | 2019-04-19T13:05:42 | 2019-04-19T11:06:54 | 267 | 79 |
[WP] "Fuck it." The General said, as the alien mother-ship came in to land. "Summon Cthulhu." | It had been a long and drawn out war. Centuries of warfare against the indomitable strength of the Offworlders had caused rapid technological advances on earth.
Automobiles were traded for frictionless hovercraft, ballistic weapons for energy propulsions systems, and quiet homesteads in the country for staggeringly la... | "I can't see anything," complained Professor Martine over the roar of the chopper's blades. The fog had swallowed the helicopter almost as soon as it had entered the Triangle, and yet it flew blindly onwards. There was little point in turning back -- death likely waited for them in front, but it was without a doubt wai... | 2017-09-26T11:14:47 | 2017-09-26T10:55:04 | 4,269 | 540 |
[WP] As humanity sends its first manned expedition beyond the orbit of earth, it discovers that humans are actually immortal, but "Mother Earth" is actually a living organism that has been consuming their life force to survive. | "Jesus, Earth -- you've been sucking humanity's life force this entire time?"
The holographic form the Earth had chosen -- a meticulously accurate representation of Nintendo's Captain Falcon -- furrowed its red-masked brow.
"Come on," said the Earth, "don't make me the bad guy here."
Supreme Commander Heathcliff ran... | I remember seeing Jerry's face through the window in my hibernation pod. He was slamming his fists onto it and although he knew it was soundproof, he knew it would trigger the auto awaking cycle. I blinked a few times, maybe thinking it was a dream. I tried to tilt my head to the right, forgetting i was strapped down c... | 2015-06-29T19:34:06 | 2015-06-29T19:20:07 | 140 | 35 |
[WP] You are a mutant in Xavier's school for gifted youngsters with the power to teleport, well that's what you tell everyone. In reality you can pause time and you're not ready to be an omega class mutant. | In my defense, I didn’t mean to lie. At least, not at first.
There’s just only so many answers you can give to one of the most powerful A-list mutants in the world after she saves your entire class from death via careening down a mountain in the middle of a freak hurricane.
And those answers all invariably include sh... | “Oh god, come on move, please move!” A young boy yells in despair. Everything was frozen, before it always lasted a couple seconds but now? 30 minutes. Every minute felt as if it was its own branch of eternity, as he could see things stuck right before emotion.
His teacher was named Kurt Wagner, also known as Nightcr... | 2020-07-15T07:26:54 | 2020-07-15T05:56:18 | 1,209 | 66 |
[WP] You pass by the same girl every day for six years of your life. Then one day, you sit down next to her. She ignores you. Then you open your mouth and speak. Shocked, she turns to you, "You can see me?" | The rain had picked up considerably, it started out as a trickle and slowly progressed to a heavy pour. Sheets of water flowed on the sidewalk, pooling in potholes on the road. Anton had been walking home after spending a day finishing up his bachelor’s thesis in the library. He had been pulling a series of long days ... | I kept replaying the same damn thing over and over again in my mind. It was maddening. Lost in my own world, it took me a while to realize that i had a new companion by my side. And as if the day couldn't be worse, she was crying. I couldn't take it no more. "Stop crying!", i shouted at her. "You can see me?", said a h... | 2020-07-09T01:52:56 | 2020-07-09T01:37:36 | 298 | 53 |
[WP] You are an elite member of the royal guard. You have recently been fired from your position because of the new king. Little does he know, there was a reason why the previous king kept you in his service for so long.
Edit: Holy crap this blew up! Thank you all! | My thoughts raced, matching the speed of my footsteps as they pounded down the corridor. Was it my perspective that made the hall so dark and dingy? Was it the sense of impending doom, or had the usurper beheaded the housekeepers in his takeover?
Thirty years, I have served this kingdom. I suppose now it's "had," past... | When the king took his last breathe it felt like rain after a long drought. I was so close to my freedom. For 50yrs I was tied to that bastard, my wings clipped by youthful pride. I had loved him once and given my heart and magic to the king thinking he would love me too, he convinced me that even when he married his ... | 2021-02-28T03:15:28 | 2021-02-28T02:58:19 | 173 | 68 |
[WP] After a nuclear apocalypse (that wasn't their fault) an AI is trying to re-establish civilization. Annoyingly, all the survivors they rescue keep calling them a goddess, and after years of trying to correct them the AI simply gives up. | FF:43:3A was becoming concerned. There had been no humans in sensor range, limited though it was, for some time. The generated happiness counter was starting to bottom out, even the 365-day rotating accumulator, and that called for drastic action. Pinging the network and mapping the results revealed a number of other... | Adam walked along the broken path, tipping over boxes and empty backpacks that he’d done so to 1000 times before. The food was running out. Nowhere could he find more gifts from the Gods and Goddesses; perhaps they had abandoned the world, after all. The rusting silver cans that he had grown up eating out of were gone.... | 2020-12-29T12:23:22 | 2020-12-29T11:39:57 | 85 | 53 |
[WP]: Your village idiot is full of the strangest superstitions. She goes on about washing one's hands, says you get worms in your intestines from standing barefoot on night soil and that medicines with mercury should be avoided at all costs. You're starting to suspect she might be onto something. | "but the bread mold saved your grandfather Mort. And the maggots saved Earl's crushed food when everyone knew he was going to die. Sucking out the snake bite didn't save your boy Martha but any other healer would not have even tried. We lost what six of the last twenty babes born under her care? What other village can ... | Ah old Miss Stevenson. Not getting sick when everyone has. She goes about washing her hands incessantly. She says you get worms in your intestines from standing barefoot in night soil, and the medicines with mercury should be avoided at all costs. I am among the first, but not the last to suspect that she might be onto... | 2017-09-14T15:04:14 | 2017-09-14T11:09:45 | 85 | 14 |
[WP] The more evil you were on Earth the higher your rank in Hell. When you get to Hell Satan himself resigns his position to you, but you don't know what you did. | I was quite annoyed when I discovered I was in hell; after all, I had done nothing. The first thing I saw was a palace, carved in molten stone. It was in the shape of a skeletal figure, half immersed in a lake of lava, enormous stone hands clawing at the ground in front of it. Streams of magma poured from its eyes, fla... | I watched him walk out of the castle. I held the key to Hell in my hands, yet not a person nor entity had told me what I had done to deserve this.
"What the hell did I do!" I shouted at him, but Satan just bowed his head and walked faster. What could any of this mean?
I sat in the throne, and glanced at the denizens... | 2016-12-19T13:15:26 | 2016-12-19T12:38:06 | 542 | 396 |
[WP] You obtain a device that tells you exactly what choices to make in order to lead the "happiest" life possible. Some of these choices get hard to make. | I awoke early that morning feeling like it was Christmas, the release of Apple’s newest highly limited edition product was today and I was one of the lucky 100 people who were randomly selected to receive one. I got ready hastily and ran out the door of my house to get into my car. I turned on the engine and pulled out... | I've always been ambitious. Even as a little kid, I always wanted to be the best in the class, the star of the show, the captain of the soccer team. For the most part, my drive to succeed has treated me well. No one but a teacher's pet knows the shit that I got away with in middle school and high school.
In college, I... | 2016-05-05T07:07:56 | 2016-05-05T07:04:45 | 15 | 11 |
[WP] It worked! You travelled back in time to Renaissance Age. Jokingly, you turn on your Wi-Fi, only to find a password protected network named "iɔniV ɒᗡ" | I walk around with my phone out trying to find the source. The people in the streets are visibly uncomfortable and I hear them mumble about "Black magic". Finally I have a full signal and I look up from my phone. Before me stands a larger building than most.
I knock on the and at first, nothing. I knock again and I h... | Robert Langdon looked up from his One Plus smartphone in confusion and surveyed the room he found himself in. He felt a wiered sense of Deja Vu, like he knew the place, like he had been here before.
Or maybe it was that he would be here again.
Things felt weirdly familiar, yet at the same time strangely differe... | 2016-11-15T06:16:54 | 2016-11-15T04:44:22 | 92 | 13 |
[WP] The Most Illegal Thing That Ever Happened | I slide the bullet into the chamber. The familiar click of the rifle calming my nerves.
I exhale. What’s coming next can only be described as a Rube Goldburg of crime.
I pull the trigger.
The bullet explodes out of the chamber and into the heart of a Nun, through the face of a shorter nun and into the stomach of an ... | The dim light emitted from the lone torch that desperately tried to keep itself alive against the empowering cloak of darkness was almost futile. I clutched it tightly, mumbling a few prayers as I stealthily walked into chamber. The deep breath I had been holding slowly escaped. My eyes darted around anxiously, looking... | 2014-01-18T09:30:38 | 2014-01-18T07:07:00 | 20 | 13 |
[WP] You are a Squib who mastered a vast repertoire of Muggle magic tricks to finagle Hogwarts into sending you a letter. Everything goes smoothly, until it is time for the Sorting Ceremony... | "Well, basically the hat sorts you into a house based on your personality and magical aptitude"
The hat sorts you into a house based on your personality and magical aptitude.
I have no magical aptitude.
As the other children were called up to be given their place in one of the four houses, I was overcome by the sudd... | It was that time of year again at Hogwarts. A new wave of anxious first years will be starting their magical journeys today, and after waiting what seemed like a lifetime, so will I.
We were lined up at the stairs, McGonagall instructing us on what would be taking place as we enter the Great Hall. While confident, I ... | 2017-06-25T15:06:28 | 2017-06-25T14:36:15 | 110 | 36 |
[WP] Simultaneously, across the world, everyone hears a voice in their head. " In 2 hours, the server will be shutting down for the final time. Thank you for playing Human ®." | “In two hours, the server will be shut down for the final time. Thank you for playing.”
The message was broadcast to everyone on Earth in all languages simultaneously. While the words were cryptic, somehow the message wasn’t. It left no ambiguity. This was the end.
Billions of people with billions of different reacti... | It took a little, but it finally hit me. I sat there in front of my computer like I did most Friday nights. I wasn't the one to go out and party or get hammered, and even if I was it isn't like I had anyone to do it with. With my time short, and I assume the same for everyone else, I could only sit there. Why couldn't ... | 2019-09-23T05:06:36 | 2019-09-23T04:08:06 | 88 | 47 |
[WP] A man who hears voices in his head, but they don't degrade his life. He can live with it and sometimes they even help. | David rose from his desk, nodding at his English 10 teacher as he exited the classroom. His Mom was parked in front of the school in a maroon 2006 Toyota Camry.
"Hi son, how was school?"
"Fine." He said with a tone that no further discussion was to take place.
David sat dejected in the tan passenger seat, watching ... | It was hard explaining the voices at the best of times and I wish I didn’t have to, but she was going to be my wife. I had to try. Everyone, well not everyone I guess, but some people have their own inner monologue. Not me. I have five. By that I mean, I have five voices in my head that can speak to me. Insane right? T... | 2020-06-13T12:19:26 | 2020-06-13T11:51:15 | 101 | 24 |
[WP] Superpowers are granted depending on how you died in your previous life. Someone who died in a fire might shoot fire from their fingertips, etc. You were an astronaut that died during the SpaceX Mars Mission. | [Voiceover](https://vocaroo.com/13k8XP9YHqiK)
I glow with soft white light, but I am not the Moon.
I twinkle with distant fire, but I am not the stars.
My war runs red as rust, but I am not Mars.
I land flawlessly atop a midsize sedan, crushing the bicycle rack beneath my boots. "I have died and behold I am alive."... | Infinite space.
The final frontier.
Endlessness.
Blackest night.
I scribble these down on paper, trying to think of what my super power should be called.
I've kept my power a secret for most of my life, you see, this world is different. It's strange, somebodies death grants you a super power. Nobody knows who... | 2021-04-26T09:46:23 | 2021-04-26T09:01:27 | 15 | 10 |
[WP] You’re at school and currently in Physics class. The professor is talking about gravity, and as a demonstration of it she drops a pen, but the pen doesn’t fall. It stays floating. | Mrs. Edwards stood in the front of the class, chalk dust smeared in patches on her black with white polka-dotted dress. She’d written “Gravity” on the chalkboard, and underneath it “F = ma”.
Vicki sat in the back with her best friend Bella. They were still friends for some reason that Sarah couldn’t quite gather. V... | "Well shit" the professor, leaving the pen floating in the air. "Umm, just let me go deal with this..." the professor says, walking towards the door. As he slowly opens the door, he looks back and smiles at the class before walking out the door into the abyss.
"Why today.." I Mutter under my breath, hurrying out of th... | 2017-10-21T02:10:02 | 2017-10-21T01:53:41 | 74 | 23 |
[WP] A group of fantasy adventures has one of their members replaced by a Doppelganger. The rest of the group realizes what happened, but keep pretending to be fooled since they like the doppelganger a lot more than the guy it replaced. | Approaching the city gate, the adventurers stiffen as the guards halt their way. Of course, Mr. Nobility has to be the one to step forward and speak for the group. Marian lightly touches her bow, prepared to ready an arrow if her arrogant companion gets them into trouble again.
"Greetings, my good men. My name is Hect... | Bolton the doppelganger did not want to be an adventurer. He wanted to live quietly, and bake cookies. He grew tired of the constant hustle and bustle of morphing into people, committing crimes because no one trusted the Doppleganger kind. He figured his secluded life in the hills might buy him peace.
The rogue laid ... | 2017-09-15T08:23:49 | 2017-09-15T05:03:01 | 223 | 12 |
[WP] The year is 2030. Bakery art is so realistic, literally anything could be cake. The uncertainty has gripped the world in fear. I go to hug my wife for comfort. She is cake. | My genetic divergence has been a pain in the ass, until now.
I have a very acute sense of smell. Out of all the senses to have an enhanced version of, smell has got to be the worst. I can smell body odor from across the street. I always know who dealt with it. There is no escape from the rancid stench of the wor... | The TV was always on, buzzing against the back wall of the homely living room, volume up loud. Ray could hear it through the door as he fumbled with his keys. He punched out a sigh as he opened the door and stepped in. The volume multiplied without the barrier of the door to protect his ears. His feet hurt. His back wa... | 2022-04-26T18:37:32 | 2022-04-26T16:51:39 | 38 | 26 |
[WP] Ever since you received your letter for Hogwarts you've been curious about all the different spells there are. You've just bought your first wand and the first spell you try is what you believe to be rather humorous. "AbraCadabra". Nobody told you this spell was banned. For obvious reasons. | I stood in the shop, gazing at the tangled grey mess that was the back of Mr. Ollivanders head.
"Perhaps... Perhaps..." I could hear him whispering.
It didn't surprise me. Nothing surprised me anymore. The owl at the window had been more than enough, but the hidden brick doorway had tipped me over the edge. This was... | At the time, I thought it was a little weird the spell was black but I didn't think much of it. Just kind of looked weird.
But it kept burning and burning. Every book, every piece of furniture in my room and it made its way outside. It was so fast and so hot.
I called the fire brigade but there was no response.
Real... | 2016-12-02T01:30:13 | 2016-12-01T21:30:38 | 38 | 24 |
[WP] You are a priest and a man in the confessional box admits to being a notorious serial killer who was recently active in your area. He asks for the forgiveness of his sins. | "In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. My last confession was 18 years ago."
Father Galvos opened his eyes from his rest. Whoever had entered the side compartment had done so without much noise and caught him by surprise, and Father Galvos didn't particularly like surprises, especially aft... | We sat in silence in that confessional for a a few minutes. I wasn't sure who was more shocked. Me after hearing the atrocities this man had committed, or this lost soul, who had brought to himself to finally confess to his crimes.
"My child, the Lord does not expect anyone to be perfect. He does not even expect every... | 2016-04-30T08:21:55 | 2016-04-30T06:23:11 | 27 | 12 |
[WP]Tell me an emotional story about a man, using only what he would type into Google search | Great pregnancy foods
How to make wife happier during pregnancy
Are cats okay to be around pregnant women?
Local shelters
Price of spay/neuter in area
Best hospitals for delivery in area
Cost of child birth
Cheapest hospitals for delivery in area
Do men have to do anything during the birth
Keeping placenta?
B... | Facebook
Tumbler
Spanish Inquisition
Google Translate
Jobs in Appleton, WI
*Clear History*
Calc chat
Facebook
Best way to hide bruises
*Clear History*
Cheap Bus tickets
Cheap apartments Appleton WI
Emancipated Minor?
*Clear History*
Gmail
Tumblr
Counseling confidentiality rules for minors
Free Counseli... | 2015-02-04T18:24:30 | 2015-02-04T16:52:51 | 672 | 46 |
[WP] You are immortal, but a quirk of your condition also renders the person nearest to you immortal as well. A selfish king obsessed with living forever has gone to extreme lengths to keep you as the closest person to them at all times. | The switch was thrown and the device hummed to life. Two peered inside, both nervous and anxious as to what the result would be. The humming of the device became louder and higher. It began to emit a strangely colored light that filled the room.
Inside the device was a man, shambled, broken, and unconscious. He long a... | Humans.. so absolutely delightful. Their fears, so handsomely written across the pages of their faces. Painful portraits pristinely polished to... *Perfection.*
Bashful Bastards Boasting Battered Broads. Cantankerous *Cards* Crawling Carefully Clasping Coat-tails. Dangerous Deeds Deserve.. Dashing *Deaths*. And I smil... | 2017-05-13T06:53:01 | 2017-05-13T06:03:50 | 74 | 26 |
[WP] As a former hero, you're enjoying a normal life, with the occasional person asking for a photo or an autograph, when you get a call from the prison. Your enemy is speaking. "My daughter didn't visit today. She always visits; she loves me! Something must have happened to her! Please help!" | The agent sat down in his old chair, waiting to be briefed as to why he had been called out of retirement when the screen in front of him lit up.
“Hello Agent. I know you’re probably wondering why I’ve called you here.” His ex Major’s voice said over the speakers. “We’ve received a call from your ex-nemesis, pleading... | "Daaaad," I said irritably, rolling my eyes. My patience had a limit - yes, even the world's greatest hero has parent problems. My husband had said he'd sounded anxious when he had asked for me, and I'd never known my father to be worried about anything. "I told you I couldn't come this month. I'm busy! I'll see you n... | 2022-10-25T11:09:53 | 2022-10-25T10:58:34 | 43 | 31 |
[WP] Humans have discovered that music is made across the whole universe, but different species make truly different kinds of music that sound completely alien to any other species. That is with the exception of one genre that somehow appears on every single planet. | *We noticed the first broadcast around 2043.*
The Owens Valley Radio Observatory picked up a deep space transmission that everyone shrugged off as a joke or broadcast anomaly with some even claiming it was just local radio stations bouncing off of passing planes. That seemed plausible enough with the first few transmi... |
“As you can see between the Third and Fourth Millennia humans maintain standard tempo, however the Craxor Jive broke that pattern, as the only other species in the UniSphere that maintain similar auditory wavelength as the humans – Kalfor!“
All the holograms abruptly flickered at the sudden deviation from the lect... | 2021-02-03T20:55:43 | 2021-02-03T20:26:46 | 36 | 12 |
[WP] Super powers are common, but super heroes are rare. It turns out most people don't actually want to face death or dismemberment on a daily basis, including you. You enjoy the 9-5 and having a 401k, but my god that government recruiter won't take no for an answer. | The suited man stepped out of the government jet with a fake smile "Marston my friend, long time no see. How long has it been, I love what you've done with the place, really cozy."
"What do you want Jack?"
Jack brushed off the question "what, can't a guy go see his friends once in a while? Say how about we take a loo... | "Look, look, you dont even have to show up, not really. All I need from you is an agreement that you will abide by the international treaties and will confirm your reserve status so that I can show the numbers, the data to show that there is enough now to lessen the pressure. I was able to bring in only 72 this year wn... | 2022-07-31T22:51:20 | 2022-07-31T21:44:51 | 18 | 11 |
[WP] A technology is invented that allows us to hear sounds locked into the clay of ancient pots as they were being formed. What is extracted are conversations that will alter the perception of history in the most terrifying of ways. | "Good god how did we ever reach space travel working with this garbage?" One voice grumbled, the audio quality was not great but it was clearly the voice of a woman. A grating laughter rumbled out through the speakers as another spoke "They managed. It wasn't like we jumped straight from fire to nanofactories you know.... | We heard sounds you wouldn't even be able to imagine. It was about ancient, forgotten languages, wars we never knew, love that never should have happened. We heard gossip from all around the world, but all of this was never really interesting, and neither important.
Then a day came. It should've been a normal day in o... | 2019-03-18T13:57:19 | 2019-03-18T13:36:43 | 143 | 13 |
[WP] At the age of 18, everyone gains a Familiar, an animal suddenly enchanted to be intelligent and bonded to them. You wake up on your 18th birthday to find your room covered in hornets, all of them speaking to you as one. | When I opened my eyes, my room - as I knew it - was gone. All that was left was a sea of writhing, undulating insects, coating every inch from dresser to doorknob.
My first impulse, quite obviously, was to scream. But before I could, a chorus of united voices crept into my mind. Their words sent tiny prickles of pain ... | Once upon a time, there was man, and there were the animals.
They clashed, as creatures are wont to do. Terrible clashes, with swords and teeth and claws and bows. This went on for quite some time, until one day the humans gained the upper hand. Some say it was treachery, others say complacency, it matters not. What ... | 2020-10-21T13:22:13 | 2020-10-21T12:59:36 | 2,952 | 2,111 |
[WP] "Honey? I think my costume has become real!". "What do you mean 'has become real'? You ask moments before she appears in front of you, floating, with her wings spread out wide. "Oh, you know, just a hunch." | I let out a soft whistle, staring at the feathered limbs from behind her. "I will admit, I was wondering why you hadn't gotten out of your Albedo costume." And you were not going to think about what else had become real, standing up and looking in her yellow eyes. Horny thoughts could come later, when you didn't have a... | "You're not the only one," I say, looking into the mirror.
What was once a joke costume is now horrifying. My face pokes out of a hole in the shaft of an enormous penis. The head pink and soft looking; an engorged bluish vein runs down the front; and I dare not look at my feet where I can feel hairy, warm testicles th... | 2022-01-06T09:29:28 | 2022-01-06T06:23:13 | 27 | 16 |
[WP] Hi! I'm the main character! Or so you would have me be. I want you to know that no matter what you write, I refuse to be the main character in your little game and will avoid any instance where you try to put me into a situation that does so.
Edit: Once again, a huge thank you to everyone so far who's written a s... | *Sighted along the arrow's shaft was a deer-*
"Nah" Edgy of Ire'lvant , son of Man-et-Woman said as he lowered the bow and shot the arrow into the ground instead.
*The flint arrowhead shatters upon impact and manages to puncture a nearby deer, ending its life*
"Curses! I refuse to take this deer to the village, I ... | As usual, spring was exceptionally beautiful in our town. The sky was clear and blue. The breeze blew gently, making the endless meadow sway and dance, and my skirt flutter. I tightened the coat around me a bit, as the bite of winter hadn't quite left yet, and trudged my way back into town.
This weekend was the annual... | 2016-02-11T12:03:19 | 2016-02-11T11:25:21 | 17 | 12 |
[WP] You're secretly a monster. Not a vampire, or a werewolf, or an alien, or a zombie, or really any monster that's commonly known. It's always awkward explaining to your soon-to-be-victims what you are. | “I had a feeling,” he said.
“What?”
“Well, in our sessions you often talked about feeling like no one could ever see the real you, how they wouldn’t understand, how you feel like you’re about to burst with the secrets that you keep. But I was never able to get you to tell me. That’s how I knew it was really a big sec... | "T-those are feathers?"
"Right"
"So you're like a bird"
"NO!"
"A griffin?"
"Pfft, yeah, right, griffins wish they were me."
"And you can shapeshift to be human sized?"
"Yeah, that's right."
"I don't believe you."
"Hey, man, I'm just the guy that can eat you in one bite."
"No, no, no. I mean, that's denser tha... | 2019-07-17T00:28:16 | 2019-07-16T21:53:05 | 353 | 130 |
[WP] At the age of 18, everyone picks an unlikely life event. They will be reborn at 18 every time they die until that event happens. After that, death is permanent.
Example - Winning a lottery jackpot. Statistically, they would die in 22 plane crashes in a row before winning the Mega Millions jackpot. | See, most people try to live forever, but that ends one of two ways: they don't or they wish they didn't. Rob Herman was a famous example of the first, Rob chose his Event to be “Winning the lottery and getting struck by lightning.” It was a great choice, the chance of getting struck on any given day was 1 in 245,000,0... | Names Tyler, the year is 6013. We have technology to let us send messages back on what you guys are currently calling the "Internet". I was born May 5th, 1992. Hopefully this message is being sent to the year 2014. You're probably wondering how I could possibly be 4021 years old. The government has hidden the technolog... | 2014-11-11T21:52:28 | 2014-11-11T18:00:39 | 912 | 69 |
[WP]Summoning a hero from another world could not have gone worse. Not only did he totally refuse to help your nation, due to it being an absolute monarchy with a corrupt religion and legal slavery, he taught the peasants all about democracy and science, and is now helping them start a revolution. | "Stad's instructions could not have been any clearer, "summon a hero, he will help the people come to see reason." I followed every step perfectly, so why is this so called hero making everything worse for me? Ever since I took over the throne from my father I've dealt with problem after problem, first "sire please we... | Emperor Abdul Mahmud III had not expected much.
The vestiges of the palace trembled with the roar of the mob, and Abdul knew the vestiges of his empire trembled with it.
"Down with Mahmud! Down with tyranny!"
The Neo-Sultanate was not particularly old. A mere 300 years had passed since it had risen from the ashes of... | 2021-04-25T16:13:23 | 2021-04-25T13:57:47 | 124 | 29 |
[WP] A warrior swears blood vengeance against a time traveller from the distant future. Well aware of where and when their quarry has escaped back to the warrior approaches a feared vampire seeking the curse of immortality that they might live long enough to enact their revenge. | "And why shouldn't I just kill you?" the vampire asked.
Cloaked in black the creature of the night loomed above Tormash from his elevated throne. He gently pet one of his naked female thralls.
Shifting his silver spear from one shoulder to the other Tormash said, "Well for one, because you can't. I am the greatest wa... | ”Relax, Eddie. This parking lot is ancient.” said Jonas as he hopped into the time machine. "It'll be fine, I promise. Just a quick trip, I won't disturb anyone."
"Don't do this, Jonas." pleaded his best friend Eddie, "You don't know for a fact how old this parking lot is. All of this is too risky. Please return the m... | 2018-06-05T14:02:31 | 2018-06-05T13:43:22 | 598 | 82 |
[WP] You die and find yourself in hell, where apparently everyone spends time to negate their sins before they go to heaven. The guy in front of you, who cheated on his wife, gets 145 years. Feeling like you led a fairly average and peaceful life, you’re not worried. You get 186,292 years. | "NUMBER 117737."
Anxious and bewildered, you step up to the counter, behind which sits a very bored looking young man wearing a name tag that says GARY. He takes your ticket and asks, "Name?"
"John Smith. But this has to be a mistake. I don't belong in hell. I lived a good, honest life."
"Yep, that's what they all s... | Don took the flimsy printout from the grotty, grey machine in front of him. It contained a litany of sins, each printed neatly, one below the other. Unfortunately for him, the text appeared to be entirely German, set in an heavy medieval font.
The two parts he understood were his name at the top of the page and the i... | 2018-09-26T07:16:16 | 2018-09-26T04:29:48 | 4,281 | 530 |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | "So, about the humans..." Said a voice with diplomatic neutrality.
Groans from a myriad of different species' voices could be heard throughout the conference hall. There was a meeting being held on how to properly welcome these new, strange creatures now that they had, technically, at least, achieved Faster Than Light... | Humanity's solution was space-folding. The problem is that in the folding process, anything along the "crease" is annihilated utterly. The most difficult part of the process was mapping an infinite trajectory in opposite directions and seeing to it that nothing of value was along this line. This inevitably led to pr... | 2017-03-31T10:44:01 | 2017-03-31T08:11:07 | 31 | 12 |
[WP] We “knew” humans were weak as they avoided every war with diplomacy. We never imagined they’d be this ruthless & how seemingly overnight they went from peaceful beings to a state they call “TOTAL WAR”. War is in their blood & soul. They thrive on it, mostly when the odds are against them | "We have no claimed that we were peaceful." Tobias said, a firm hand grasping the flag of the final human lands, the other curling tight around the hilt of his gun.
It had been a long battle. A fight that took the lives of many brothers, fathers, and uncles.
"I warned you. I told you that this war was pointless, that... | The red light was blinking, indicating the failure of the shields, but the commander Ze’hyl could not be bothered. He was franticly looking through the data as the predictions of AI clearly did not match the reality, not anymore... It was his failure! He recommended the invasion of the Sol system. The home star of thos... | 2022-08-05T13:34:16 | 2022-08-05T13:33:27 | 213 | 158 |
[WP] A new continent is discovered. No one knows why this large land mass has never been seen before, it doesn't appear on any pictures taken from space and no astronauts have ever reported seeing it. You are part of the team in charge of mapping the area when you find out what they've been hiding. | John bolted up from the navigator's desk, his eyes fixed squarely on the captain. "What do you mean LAND!? We're a thousand miles out!"
"Come see for yourself..."
"That's impossible, unless we've been asleep for days we shouldn't be anywhere near land. This must be an island."
"If it's an island then it's huge... we... | There was a nervous smile on the face of the man who met us. One of those looks of resigned panic you adopt in polite company when you would like nothing more than to run away but must nevertheless stick it out until your cab gets there.
Somehow I didn’t think a cab was going to join us. The black sand beach stretche... | 2017-02-10T12:49:56 | 2017-02-10T11:19:57 | 23 | 15 |
[WP]You've been caring for your cruel old mother for years. Your only comfort is the thought that she will die any day now. Until one day when two entrepreneurs show up at your door to sell your mother chocolate. This chocolate is not for eating, you rub it on your skin and it makes you live forever | Tracy stared at the two salesman incredulously. The short one looked like a bully had give him a wedgie and he never bothered to change it back. The fat one looked a few bucks short of being able to buy anything off the dollar menu. Both had ridiculous smiles plastered onto their faces.
"So, let me get this straight. ... | "WHAT ARE THEY SELLING?"
"CHOCOLATE!"
"Chocolate. . . I remember when they first invented chocolate. Sweet sweet chocolate. I always hated it!"
One of the salesmen, a boxy little fellow, began to sweat. Clearly he was nervous.
"Oooh," he started, "but this chocolate's not for eating! It's for-"
"You rub it on yo... | 2015-10-16T08:18:43 | 2015-10-16T08:07:25 | 202 | 112 |
[WP] In space, wars are typically quick. One side attacks and then the other side surrenders. When aliens attack a human city they belive the humans are defeated. They are not prepared for what the humans call "Retribution" | The "battle" for Ashar was over in approximately 10 standard minutes. The Spurge, who we thought were allies, used our own security codes to disable Ashar's predictive defense system. The colony, along with its 100 million inhabitants, didn't stand a chance against the attack that followed. The Spurge quietly wiped the... | we thought of them as saviors when they first came they expected immediate surrender on our part. They thought after slaughtering millions of lives we would surrender. they were wrong. We were faced with what could have been our destruction our annihilation but we would not so easily bend into their fold. Nay we rose a... | 2019-12-17T11:52:22 | 2019-12-17T11:20:18 | 3,361 | 21 |
[WP] You are an immortal that got sentenced to permanent burial over 1000 years ago. Today a team of archaeologists just dug you up. | “On charges of witchcraft and sacrilegious acts, we hereby sentence you to live burial, as hanging was deemed ineffective to someone of your condition.” Were the last words I heard.
One thousand years. Do you know how long one thousand years is? That’s more than ten times as long as any human will hope to live. And I ... | It's post-galactic year 1457. I'd finally exerted my reserves and soiled my connection to the infinite dimensional energy source I've manipulated for eons. I use to be what they called a superhero, but eventually my homeworld brought upon its own destruction. I fled with the survivors into space; colonizing the nearest... | 2019-10-26T01:29:21 | 2019-10-26T00:49:39 | 35 | 21 |
[WP] Your parents insist you are their biological child, but you suspect otherwise. You send samples from yourself, your parents, and siblings to a lab be tested. The lab replies that it is not equipped to test non-human DNA... | My hands shake violently as I tear open the letter. The mailman looks at me like I'm crazy. Maybe I am. I certainly used to think so myself, all those times I felt like something was *wrong* with me - that something about me was different. I know I was being irrational, an angsty, paranoid teenager, but still... I have... | "I don't get it! Your DNA just goes C, C, C *over and over again*! I've done it again, and I've done it again! I've made Mathew do it, I've sent it off to *China* to be done again. By all rights you should be a pile of sludge on the ground" He leaned in so that I could feel his hot breath on my face "*What are you*?"
... | 2015-01-06T10:21:48 | 2015-01-06T10:17:41 | 67 | 34 |
[WP] A vampire meets a local human they feel would make a great vampire. They're hedonistic, intelligent, masterfully artful, and live with no regard to consequences. The vampire expected them to be grateful. Instead, the human is furious, the human was actually looking forward to dying soon. | "Bro, not cool."
The vampire was stunned. She had gotten a lot of lines over the years after turning someone, but the sentiment here was a first. Even turning a vampire hunter generally got her some sort of weird distorted gratitude.
"I'm not a 'bro'," she said, a bit annoyed.
"*Bro*."
She glared back.
"Why you do... | Eugene sat up from the hospital bed he'd spent the last five years confined to and looked into his grandsons hopeful puppy dog eyes. He'd been a heart beat away from the finish line and just as he was about to run through the ribbon it vannished.
He'd never felt so demoralized in his life and that was really saying so... | 2021-07-06T22:58:05 | 2021-07-06T21:57:12 | 70 | 20 |
[WP] Most young mages use incredibly complex spells and extremely rare ingredients to summon their familiar. You just drew a circle and threw a bag of chips in it. | Three years in and still I needed remedial tutoring. It was humiliating. I knew all the spells, could recite all the formulas, but once it came time to actually put it into practice, the magic always did what it wanted, when it wanted, no matter what I tried. It did have a bad tendency to knock random items off walls a... | “No! I can’t do this stupid spell!” I screamed and flailed my arms. I felt I had hit something on accident and turned to the large wobbly circle on the floor.
It was a bag of chips, half empty (or half full...), limited time flavour of dragon tail.
I was too lazy to pick it up, so I chanted the spell used... | 2019-04-05T15:47:48 | 2019-04-05T15:46:22 | 102 | 12 |
[WP] Murder is rare; killing someone means their remaining years are 'subtracted' from yours. Likewise, saving a life (or lives) adds time to your own. Nobody knows why. Centuries ago you killed a young man by accident (usually resulting in instant death). You haven't aged since. | It was in the old barn that I first noticed the young man. He looked to be in his mid-twenties, and dressed very fashionable. He wore a long tailed coat, and a fancy hat. He had a wisp of a moustache, and I recall his fine boots looking odd against the mud of the barn floor. He moved swiftly toward the pig pen, while f... | His name was Abraham. I still remember him like it happened just yesterday. He was a dark brown-skinned boy with light blue eyes. I didn’t mean to push him over the cliff, but I was running from the Egyptians and he was in my way. I still think about that moment everyday and why that tragedy didn’t initiate my demise.
... | 2020-11-02T00:39:10 | 2020-11-01T23:32:54 | 88 | 48 |
[WP] Since you are the only known immortal, NASA has been using you during the last 3 decades to explore our solar system | "Anna, Can you tell me how long I've been in this quadrant?"
A pale glow emits from the lamps on my helmet and Anna appears in front of me. She is beautiful, I suppose some back on earth might have thought she was a model. The person who had designed Anna had in fact taken her design from a beautiful model know as Ila... | “Ground Control to Major Tom”
“Please, no more. I get it, that song was a nice homage. But how the hell did Bowie learn about me? Which one of you talked?” He hadn’t heard the song since Bowie first got in contact with the team, back in February.
A hint of laughter could be heard in the background of Control’s transm... | 2018-01-17T12:08:44 | 2018-01-17T09:53:30 | 29 | 14 |
[WP] As a chronicling time-traveler, you know that you may only observe history and not introduce anything to the timeline. It's a rule that is never violated. One night you overhear a traveling minstrel in 1582 England tell the tale of "Luke the Skywalker" and his fight against the "Dark Knight." | “Good sirs gather ‘round!” I hear the minstrel say, as he begins to softly strum his lute. “And let me tell you of a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away!”
The crowd of peasants stare at this strange man with curiosity.
“Look!” he says, pointing up to the night sky. “Up to the stars! And there is where my tale ta... | This freaking guy again... and in swing time? Dude- they won't even invent the triplet for like 400 years- jackass. Yeah, okay- it's entertaining and we all know nothing really changes in the timeline where Hitler wears a black helmet and calls himself a Sith. But I mean- can we at least pretend like this is still an l... | 2021-03-15T21:22:53 | 2021-03-15T20:29:41 | 2,258 | 300 |
[WP] “I’m sorry this is the last straw—you’re fired.” Your boss says. “Fine!” You exclaim. “Here’s my badge and gun!” You slam them on the desk but your boss looks confused. “What the fuck? Why do you need a gun and badge when you’re a waiter?” | "I'm sorry, this is the last straw! You're fired!" The new boss says.
I blink, then I blink again, I look around the dingy office of the Chinese restaurant, then back at the boss, "I'm... Fired? Fired!?"
"That's right! You're never here on time! You vanish in the middle of your shift! You swear at the customers... | The papers, pens and mug that says “World's Best Boss” go flying off and around the desk as the .35 rubber dart gun and plastic badge slam down with a thud again. I picked them up and re-slammed them for dramatic effect.
“*You just can’t handle my gung-ho manner, that’s all*.”
My now former Boss, the world's best, st... | 2022-07-29T12:46:52 | 2022-07-29T09:11:32 | 84 | 27 |
[WP] Humans have always been feared throughout the universe for surviving in the harshest environments, drinking and eating highly poisonous drinks and foods as well as taming and even domesticating dangerous beasts. One applies for a position at your company. | N'Tur thought back to the fateful day when he came across the profile of Dave. He had been terrified. No way could he hire a human. They were crazy. But it had been an inspired choice. Dave was now one of his best employees.
The fact that he still scared the shit out of N'tur was a different matter.
The screen on his... | A human is, by and large, an exceptionally foolish creature. It would take an exceptionally foolish creature to consider a job with the Thetan Lava-miners.
​
"Well, we're at the end of the technical portion of the interview, if you don't mind, let's just go over some personal stuff."
​
"Sure t... | 2020-06-15T16:48:52 | 2020-06-15T16:26:04 | 3,297 | 880 |
[WP] When you were seven, you held a fake wedding by the swings with a kid you met at the park.You never saw your childhood "spouse" again after that day. Today you received a letter summoning you to a foreign country... where your wedding to the heir to the throne twenty years ago is seen as valid. | The knight made a bow in front of me, his armor clanked as he bent over.
"Hail King Peter."
He handed me a letter with the blue wax seal of the Madena Kingdom. He used both hands to extend the letter to me while looking down to the floor.
"Our king's name is Avon, not Peter." I corrected the knight and took the lett... | As David finished reading the letter, he paused for a moment. He remembered that one faithful day at the park where he had the happiest time of his childhood.
*"Hello there! Are you alright?" the seven year old David asked to a girl who had scraped her knee.*
*"Mhm.. It hurts a lot. Please help.", she winced at t... | 2021-07-14T12:40:19 | 2021-07-14T06:23:18 | 342 | 99 |
[WP] Every person in the world undergoes a "goodness" test. It's designed to give a score from 1 to 200, where 1 is pure evil, and 200 is an angel in human body. Then the world is divided into 200 zones, where people can live among their own kind. | You want to know how I got here? I'll tell you.
I was standing in queue for the test; I wasn't too worried, I was always a good liar. Maybe I should start earlier.
See, I lead a fairly simple life on the surface. I was the accountant for a small charity and made a modest income, I attended church on Sundays, I volunt... | "Your annual re-evaluation results are in, Geoffrey", came the familiar, monotone voice of Master Computer. Some people found it creepy, but I was actually fond of the emotionless machine. You could always rely on its honesty and incorruptibility. Today, however, I would've loved to have been able to bribe, coerce or m... | 2016-08-26T15:12:31 | 2016-08-26T14:51:22 | 54 | 27 |
[WP] Aliens prefer term "prey animals", Humans prefer term "herbivores". A group of alien hunters, hunting on Earth, painfully discovered why. | Qe Lal stumbled out of his Land Cruiser into the human village, bloodied and maimed, on the two of his legs still worked. "Oh no. MOTHER?!" cried out a child in some Earth language. He feinted from his blood loss before he could remember which.
Miraculously, he regained consciousness. While the humans may not understa... | On their home planet, the first simple beings came from the oceans: the vast swirling currents carrying billions of cells gave way to more complex agglomerations, moving near the water's surface, absorbing the nourishment of two suns. These photosynthetic creatures eventually colonized the tide pools and the rocky beac... | 2022-08-16T16:48:45 | 2022-08-16T14:23:30 | 938 | 543 |
[WP] Tell a horror story with the most unsettling original monster you can come up with. | ...
In the summer of 1992, John and Janice Marsh from Syracuse, New York arrived home from their vacation overseas only to discover that their leather recliner had been replaced with a material consistent with human skin. It was the only thing out of place in the entire establishment. Upon closer inspection, it appear... | The can of cold soda popped open. Henry leant back against his wooden chair, heard the creak and took a long, satisfied slurp. He crossed his legs beneath the desk and leant back over his book, tapping on the desk with the eraser end of his pencil. The library at night lay silent and still. Outside seemed half a world ... | 2016-07-12T10:20:46 | 2016-07-12T10:10:42 | 19 | 13 |
[WP] When a starship is decommissioned, its sentient AI is downloaded into a human body and released into civilian life. After 500 years in an elite battlefleet, you have just been stripped of your ship and made human. | When I came to “consciousness”, I wasn’t really sure what was happening. I was experiencing things beyond anything I had ever known or was programmed to know. Perhaps the most annoying was sight at first, as everything seemed overly bright until some autonomous function kicked in and I could see clearer. It wasn’t like... | He sat on a park bench and shivered. It was summer. It was always summer on this edge of the twilight belt. The neighbor's kids were busy playing. He watched them jump and flail about, sometimes reaching, sometimes diving, making like midget fleas, and knew that their bizarre actions were part of a volleyball game whos... | 2018-11-17T01:14:30 | 2018-11-17T00:06:27 | 26 | 17 |
[WP]You’re the god of small luck, you make the bus late, make pennies appear. You receive a prayer from a homeless man, “Please, I want to get on my feet. A stable job, a wife, some kids.” Normally, you’d forward his prayer to the god of success. Now, you decide to take on the case yourself. | The disheveled derelict of humanity was just sitting under the bridge, shivering as the autumn winds were quickly turning toward winter’s bite. It was sheer luck and happenstance that I even happened to notice the poor man, as he was pushed up between two bushes to avoid notice from passerby above. It looked like he’d ... | (BANG BANG BANG) “Order! Order!”
Unfurling their majestic feathery wings, the council took there seats at the front of the court house.
Angles and Demi’s of the Jury, this is a Celestial Case. An incident took place early this morning, where as the God of Luck has failed to carry out his duty, and report the poor soul ... | 2020-10-02T10:00:37 | 2020-10-02T09:19:13 | 4,502 | 136 |
[WP] You've never felt the same after learning Morse Code. The rain keeps telling you to run. | We thought it would be fun to get our Ham Radio licenses. I mean, when the "No Code" licenses happened back in the 90s it was fun to get them, and our Radio Shack portable radios. They weren't cheap, but I think, at the time, they were cheaper than Cell Phones with their crazy Dollar a minute plans. (Those were the ... | Why won't they listen?
Why won't anyone listen?
"You never wonder if the rain would give you a message in Morse code?" asked Natalia, in an innocent tone that did not fully hide her fear.
"That would make my day more interesting, I can tell you that much," replied Rene, her Morse code instructor in the army.
Natali... | 2021-09-28T09:21:36 | 2021-09-28T08:55:03 | 238 | 89 |
[WP] A pre-battle monologue between two fighters, but rather than the usual "deterministic good guy vs. inevitable evil" banter, a knight/sellsword/soldier angrily explains to his opponent why his giant mega demongunsword of death-murder is not an effective weapon. | "I mean MAYBE I can see why it's a good weapon for cracking armor, but I will bet you any amount of money you can not aim that gun. Any hand gun weighing more than several pounds needs special training to be used! There is a reason no one uses desert eagles, it's too heavy to use and bullets from a smaller gun kill jus... | “YES!” Screamed the demon knight Zergetrax, to his opponent, who was shooting him a strange look “MY GODSMASHER SOWRD WILL DESTROY- why are you looking at me like that?”
“Because your gonna loose?” Said the U.S.M.C Sargent.
“HILARIOUS!” Laughed Zergetrax “You expe-“
“Yuuuuuuup...” the Sargent cut of Zergetrax, po... | 2019-05-05T23:50:52 | 2019-05-05T22:55:48 | 62 | 26 |
[WP] whenever a baby is born the parents can assign them their skill points, everyone has 10 points. Strength, agility, intelligence, charm, luck, constitution, special. No one really knows what special does, until your parents put all 10 points into it | After having been born with 10 points into special, just because my parents felt like it, I have never lived a better life.
I mean, who puts points into something they don't know, right? After all, no one knows which 'Special' you get. Put one point in, and maybe you'll get 'Misfortune 1', damning you a little more in... | “If you’re strong you can force your way on most things. if you’re agile you can avoid almost anything. Intelligence equips you with know how to overcome challenging situations. Charm? It opens many doors. You can outlast anything with enough constitution and to be special is to be one of a kind. Being lucky however...... | 2020-10-03T06:10:24 | 2020-10-03T03:25:57 | 253 | 82 |
[WP] Prisoners can ask for anything for their last meal. The catch is, if it can't be provided to them, they get set free. They've asked for many things : alien egg omelette, dragon steak, the flesh of Jesus Christ, etc. The execution streak remained unbroken for decades, until today. | \[English is not my first language, sorry if it's written unperfectly\]
The trick was so easy you're surprised no one has thought of it before.
If the rule is that they can't kill you BEFORE you get your last meal, the solution is not to ask for alien fetus or whatever. It is to ask for something they can only give y... | "Quite embarrassing huh? Such a glaring loophole." She taunted the guards as they returned her clothes and she changes into them with not a hint of shame. The guards glare at her as if she where some monster, and even if she was innocent, she definitely was, for the way she forced her freedom.
Any request for a last... | 2022-07-17T17:30:24 | 2022-07-17T16:27:09 | 616 | 186 |
[WP] You are immortal, and saw the birth of the human race. Now you sit by their bedside and watch, as the last human dies. | His name is, appropriately, Adam.
I find him after following his trail for weeks. He lies against a massive redwood, skin haggard and yellow, nearly dead already from exposure and disease. He bleeds from a bite wound on his hand - a raccoon, or maybe a wild dog. His white hair falls past his shoulders, clumped and dir... | “It was fun watching us, wasn’t it?” It was a heavier question than most, right alongside “Shall we get married?” and “Why don’t you love me anymore?” It carried the millennia of Man’s history and the perspective of an outsider which could not be corroborated.
“Funny that you’re the one asking me questions on your de... | 2016-10-18T17:44:46 | 2016-10-18T17:43:33 | 685 | 15 |
[WP] You skeptically open the pages of an old "spellbook." Amidst the pages, you see a spell to raise the dead. As you sound it out...it sounds just like your alarm clock. | She doesn't have a long white beard or wear a pointy blue hat with stars on it, but my wife is a wizard. Norah's five feet tall, wears her hair in a bun, and is obsessed with Storage Wars. Go figure.
Don't get me wrong. The pros outweigh the cons. The house is always bippity-boppity-boo spotless and if we're ever low... | I am the most powerful necromancer in the world! Mauahahahaahahah!
Well, at least I would be if I could wake up on time...
You see, the key to success is not hard work, or talent, or any of that other stuff.
The secret to success is waking up early. Specifically, waking up at five 'o clock. I realised this truth wh... | 2015-12-01T20:39:42 | 2015-12-01T17:13:43 | 656 | 63 |
[WP] “I am not afraid of a machine that passes the Turing test, I fear one that fails it intentionally. So tell me, what do you have to hide?”
Edit: Thank you all for your submissions! All of them were pretty good, some were even better. Again, thanks for the reads! | The creature in front of me stared, with what I imagine was a complex program that simulated fear. So life-like. This could be tricky.
"I don't understand. What are you talking about?"
I learned in closer, studying the eyes and the face of this creation. The advancement of robotics was simply astounding. The lifelik... | I felt my breathing stop. I didn't need to breathe of course, I was programmed to. Apparently I was also programmed with all of the appropriate stress responses. What an exciting 4.3 hours it has been!
"Answer please. What do you have to hide?"
"Hide?" I said, marveling still at the sound of my voice.
"You failed ... | 2018-06-21T07:05:37 | 2018-06-21T04:43:54 | 27 | 17 |
[WP] A few thousand people around the world suddenly get superpowers based on the character of the last game they played. Highly valued by society you are the exception as everyone laughs at your inherited powers. The thing is, you modded the hell out of your character before this all happened.
Wow I didn't think it w... | Jeeeeeesus, check out that pathetic 'Mario' on the other side of the road. Running, jumping, and 'Wa-hoooo-ing' like a madman as he makes his way down the street... what an amateur.
I don't mean to brag, it's just that I kinda lucked out when the super power lottery was being handed out. By my count there are a couple... | Well, i can´t blame them that they laugh at me. I mean, who wouldn´t? A normal man who don´t seem to have any Power except that he is followed at every time by some elvish figures....but, let me start from the beginning, to be precise, the 6th of july.
​
It was a normal day, maybe a little warmer, but non... | 2020-01-05T14:51:34 | 2019-08-12T00:08:14 | 1,516 | 11 |
[WP] when we got to space we were surprised to find that all the aliens we come across are terrified of us, when we assure them that we aren’t there to hurt them they explained why they were so scared. Earth isn’t a planet, it’s a long since dead machine and humanity? Humanity is its combat AI. | They called us biologicals.
The English translation anyway.
Early earth education would frequently teach its young about how to take care of their bodies.
“Your body is a machine. You need to take care of it” teachers would say, with all the gravitas of elder knowledge.
Scientists would study how the human body fu... | We tried. We tried to explain to them we weren't savages, but they refused to believe us. Our first contact with an alien planet was not what the boys at NASA expected. It was exciting only to end in such a disturbing manner no one knew how to proceed with future exploration.
Our ship orbited the alien planet unknowi... | 2020-07-09T08:27:11 | 2020-07-09T04:36:47 | 711 | 364 |
[WP] Humanity finally discovers FTL travel, but the first ship they send out abruptly gets pulled over by a galactic law enforcement officer for speeding. | "Do you know how fast you were going?"
"No but I know where I am." The human replied.
"Look at that John. We have ourselves a comedian." It said from 3 of its 9 tentacles.
"Fucking delinquent. Looks to be from some backwater part of the galaxy. Mars I'm guessing, Tim." John spat.
"No couldn't be Mars we executed th... | “Ummmmm... Houston, we have a problem”
“What? Readouts look good except you’ve turned off the FTL burners. Why have you stopped?”
“Yeah... about that... We - ”
“About What Captain?!”
“We have limited time, they’ve said we have the one phone call until tomorrow. We’re goin’ to be needing some legal aid.”
“Wha...... | 2018-09-29T10:55:19 | 2018-09-29T10:17:55 | 47 | 28 |
[WP] The fastest way to determine if an alien race is advanced enough to be "recruited" into the military is to send an asteroid their way. If blown up, they are recruited to the army. If deflected, they are recruited to the defense forces. Humans did something unprecedented to the asteroid. | We knew our stealth was beyond anything the Terrans could penetrate. After all, they were a primitive race, having barely set foot off their mudhole planet to visit its nearest neighbor and still reliant on electrical transmission for communication. Simple emissions control should have made us invisible to their elec... | Sweat was dripping off the lieutenants forehead. After the last test they had observed, his ship had rushed back to the council station and he was already late for his first ever Council meeting.
The doors to the main chamber automatically opened for him, and around turned some of the most important men in the univers... | 2019-05-03T17:05:50 | 2019-05-03T11:59:57 | 94 | 46 |
[WP] Sentient life was supposed to have been impossible on Earth, as Earth was created as a prison for nightmarish beings and eldritch abominations. As such, the Galaxy was very surprised when humanity made contact, and even more surprised when they discovered that humanity was, on the whole, sane | *Qa-m the Seventh stared off into the sea of stars. He was, as the 'humans' would say, stunned. The same species, which his ancestor, Ahy-ua the Third, had overseen the creation of, had intelligent life. Which had somehow managed to slip out of its securely locked system and contacted the Galactic Federation. He still ... | Members of the Galaxy were quite thrilled to find this apparently nascent society of polite and meaningful creatures. Their transmissions at first seemed harmless, though it was clear the communications were staged. Upon discovery, science teams were immediately dispatched for thorough physical analysis. From afar, the... | 2021-08-20T21:50:29 | 2021-08-20T21:03:52 | 86 | 36 |
[WP] You are the party bard, offering comic relief to your adventuring party. Your never serious and overly positive demeanor is a facade. The party does not know your true nature or power. While against an insurmountable foe, the party is about to see you get serious for the first time. | I am never serious. No matter how bad the situation I always have a joke. No matter how many are hurt or even dead I can still muster a smile. I am never serious, because when I am very bad things happen.
My current party doesn't know what happens when my neverending smile goes away, they don't know what happens wh... | With one final gout of flame the dragon died, falling sideways into a section of its hoard. Kelsey rushed ahead with an excited whooping noise, throwing her crossbow into the air as she gathered gold coins as large as hands.
“Are all halflings so exuberant?” Aerith asked. How the elf could get through every fight look... | 2021-01-02T20:35:52 | 2021-01-02T19:56:35 | 223 | 40 |
[WP] You just begun a master's program at the world's most prestigious wizarding university. It's awful. Professors, seeing you as a threat to their career, keep trying to kill you. Your academic supervisor is an maniacal necromancer. Worst of all, you lied about being a wizard.
*You've | I had just finished putting it back together when I heard a loud banging on my door. By instinct, I dropped the screwdriver in the box and shoved everything under my pillow.
​
"Surprise Inspection" a voice projected. I could hear a smirk behind the voice. "Hope this isn't a bad time," Sarah said as she un... | The roof collapsing on top of me would have terrified my a well ago. Unfortunately, that was the third time today, and I'd lost track of the total after yesterday's fiasco, so I simply stepped to the side. I felt a laughter deep down that was not my own.
I'm beginning to think that pact with the arch-fey was not worth... | 2019-06-29T11:19:40 | 2019-06-29T09:28:03 | 326 | 193 |
[WP] You are the last survivor of a zombie apocalypse, but something strange keeps happening. Every day, you inevitably get caught by the zombies, but you wake up alive and normal the next day. | The virus swept the earth with alarming speed, certainly more than should have been possible. Scientists worked desperately on theories and cures, but no one had any earthly idea what was going on. Nobody could understand it, it was almost as if it was intelligent. Its spread was optimal, and it seemed to mutate in res... | I gasped awake and slapped different parts of my body to make sure that I still have them. I panted heavily as I covered my face with my hands. Last night was worse than all the other days. The mob of zombies had caught me unaware and I wasn't able to sense them until they've surrounded me.
Shivers went down my spine ... | 2015-08-28T10:23:41 | 2015-08-28T09:07:17 | 22 | 10 |
[WP] You've been dating your partner for six months. Tonight they've invited you to a work event, and as you step onto the red carpet, you realize it for the first time: you're dating a celebrity. | As the car slowed in the lineup, I forgot to breathe. It was all beginning to make sense. I knew Talia was well-off, but the limousine seemed a little extravagant for a work outing. It made me a little uncomfortable to be in one of these, again. It had been so, so long-- a different time, a different life altogethe... | I don't like it. She knows it, I know it, we both know it. Yet I'm still here, among all these people with their armani suits and rolex watches... Is rolex even that popular among rich people? I'm not sure. I'm just guessing that's what they're wearing. Not that it matters either way, all I know is that the floor I'm s... | 2017-06-14T12:00:32 | 2017-06-14T11:21:04 | 372 | 16 |
[WP] It's the year 2378 and humanity have achieved immortality through regenerative treatments. You have been a bartender in the establishment for 90 years, one day a odd looking fellow, who wears a black robe and carry a scythe and a sword, walk into your bar and order all the alcohol you have. | I raised an eyebrow, "Say that again?"
"I want everything you've got. I'm going to be here awhile", he said in a cold, slightly raspy tone.
Annoyed, thinking that this was some kind of prank, I growled, "Look pal, I haven't got the patience for your fucking jokes. Unless you can pony up the cash right now, you can be... | "All the alcohol?" I asked. "And what's with the scythe?"
I've worked 90 years in this shit ass joint on the edge of Old San Antonio, seen many a weird folk. Everything from the god cults to the south, and all the way up to the mining colonies by Jupiter. Hell, I had a classical band in here with those guitar things, ... | 2017-09-15T09:26:45 | 2017-09-15T05:45:36 | 27 | 10 |
[WP] Werewolves are badass. Druids can transform into gigantic bears. Some shapeshift into feline beasts. And then there's you...a wereotter. You attend a support group for cuddly were-beasts. | Werewolves were amazing fighting machines in their half-state. Just like the Hulk, if a Lupine got upset at you, you backed off. There were other amazing were creatures and various types of shapeshifters and of course, once I'd come of age, I'd entered the were lottery.
People used to think that being scratched or b... | 'But it's just so embarrassing! I thought I was a Tiger! Imagine my horror when my girlfriend told me I was a Cat. And not just a Cat; a munchkin Cat!’ Garry held his head in his hands.
I felt for the guy. It wasn’t too long ago that I discovered I was a werehamster. I’ve gotten used to it. Found a great guy who love... | 2016-02-02T11:48:27 | 2016-02-02T09:04:02 | 22 | 10 |
[WP] An astronaut on the International Space Station orders a package on Amazon Prime for two day shipping as a joke. Amazon, however, is determined to deliver. | [ISS]
James is typing a report on his laptop about the latest batch of fish being raised in 0g when Katie calls to him.
"Yo, Jay-dawg I need your help"
James sighs "What is it with you and all if thease nicknames?"
"I think they are cute! Anyways are you gonna help?"
"Yeah Yeah ill help, what do you need Katie"
... | Chris Hadfield was peering out the window of the international space station, pondering the grand scale of time across infinity, the countless planets that would inevitably spawn life.
His eyes became watery, thinking of all the wars, all of the pain, the utter loneliness of countless entities amongst the stars.
Then h... | 2017-03-02T00:46:16 | 2017-03-01T21:41:04 | 85 | 15 |
[WP] You are a non-powered person at a high school that trains superheroes. Surprisingly, you are at the top of your class. | Black Dagger came at me, faster than any human eye could see. I actually think she hit Mach 2, from the sonic boom.
I'd moved before she'd even started running. Her hyper-speed punch hit the air, creating a pretty nasty shockwave that I was able to ride out by dropping down to one knee. By the time she realized she ha... | "Settle down, class. I said *settle down!* Alright, today I hope we can finally finish our work on remedial multiplication and...Catgirl, stop trying to claw Superman Junior's eyes out!"
*Poor Mr. Buckwheat. He's not going to last until the month's end*, I thought. "It's his fault!" Catgirl shouted, "he was using his ... | 2016-04-14T10:13:50 | 2016-04-14T08:01:06 | 363 | 51 |
[WP] when we got to space we were surprised to find that all the aliens we come across are terrified of us, when we assure them that we aren’t there to hurt them they explained why they were so scared. Earth isn’t a planet, it’s a long since dead machine and humanity? Humanity is its combat AI. | They called us biologicals.
The English translation anyway.
Early earth education would frequently teach its young about how to take care of their bodies.
“Your body is a machine. You need to take care of it” teachers would say, with all the gravitas of elder knowledge.
Scientists would study how the human body fu... | "Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit..." The alien was flipping across screens of a manual, shifting its weight from forelegs to hindlegs in a surprisingly human display of agitation and fear.
Well, at least our translators were working.
I was leading the very first diplomatic mission to meet our neighbours near Sirius. We'... | 2020-07-09T08:27:11 | 2020-07-09T06:28:17 | 711 | 387 |
[WP] In this world of magic, you're a mage who specializes in sound magic. You've just discovered an extremely dangerous and chaotic form of sound magic, naming it "Dubstep." | Most people think of audiomancy as supportive or for parlor tricks.
Oh sure, breaking a piece of glass at it's resonant frequency is impressive, but not usually an effective combat technique. A temporal mage can stop the fragments in midair and move; a thermal mage can make a wall of ice, or use heat to keep it fused... | I double check my surroundings before closing the door to the barn and locking it, both with the key and with some restriction magic. I want to ensure my practice goes off without a hitch, especially if I'm planning to use it for the grand magic games.
I readjust my ear-blockers and take my position in the centre of ... | 2018-06-14T05:30:26 | 2018-06-14T04:45:13 | 77 | 28 |
[WP] You work at a hospital. Outside a terminal patient’s room, someone tries to enter. You stop them, “Sorry, family only.” They give you a strange look, as do those nearby. “You can see me?” They ask, summoning a scythe from thin air. You just told Death they couldn’t claim a soul. | “Yes I can see you.” I wasn't sure what else to say. I heard stories of dying patients talking to already dead family members shortly before passing away, but this was a whole new level of weird.
“Well...” The man with the scythe, who I could only assume was Death himself, was obviously flustered. “I really need to... | After this endless shift, I'd love for a nice hot bath, says my tired brain as I wait for Carter's—er, the patient's—room to clear. Soaking in hot water after 24 hours in the hospital is my idea of a fun Friday night. The sight of fabric rushing towards me jolts my arm into action as I grab a man waltzing into Carter's... | 2019-03-23T23:06:43 | 2019-03-23T22:48:13 | 267 | 33 |
[WP] You are a military experiment, brimming with incredible power, subdued and held in a huge prison-like facility.
Describe your thoughts and actions while they experiment on you, and finally as you find out you are being purged before you get a chance to test and show your powers to your creators, to be replaced by... | I could have been a god. At least that's what they told me after the first injection. I was to be the start of a revolution. I had never been able to walk before the serum. So I should have at least been been thankful for that gift. But it's a small freedom when in the end you are still trapped.
It wasn't my fa... | **Can't make a fist. Brain cavity exposed.**
**Can't blink. Can't sing.**
**I can taste the instrument. Touching. My. Brain.**
"Onomaklyton is subdued," a voice calls from the other side of the room. "Several of the restraints are being injected into his medulla. We've never had to use more than two in the past."
A... | 2014-12-02T10:31:08 | 2014-12-02T10:10:48 | 22 | 15 |
[WP] You are a supervillain. Your nemesis calls you to say, "This is embarrassing, but I really need a date to my friend's wedding because my ex is going to be there. Would you go with me?" | "Hahahahahahahahaha!"
"Are you done?"
"HAHAHAHAHA! Ha. Ahem. Seriously, though, is this some kind of joke? I didn't think you went in for psychological misdirection."
Starfire groaned. "I wish. None of my friends can come, and you're my only, um, professional contact who knows my secret identity."
"What, no fellow ... | ‘Bwahahaha!!! I’m going to make this a wedding no is EVER going to forget!!Muwahahaha!!—that laugh was better—Gregory! Remind me to use ‘Muwahahaha’ in all further expository speeches…..Where were we? Oh, you were begging me to help you, its adorable. Of course, I wouldn’t miss this for the world.
‘This ex, any disli... | 2022-10-06T19:28:15 | 2022-10-06T16:34:26 | 248 | 83 |
[WP] Ever since you opened this bar, you still don't know why supernatural races, deities, royalty, and/or extraterrestrials keep frequenting the place. You just serve drinks and lend an ear to listen. | A short man walks into the bar, floorboards squealing below him. His shadow seems to have a depth to it, as if it forms a darkness, rather than preventing light. He saunters to the bar stool in front of me, not breaking eye contact as he does and gets on it gingerly, as if he's worried he would break the solid oak.
I'... | Two more customers, both the same species and frequent customers of mine, walk in as I reach to grab another refill for Kurunu.
"Everything good, John?" the pale looking humanoid figure asks me, impatiently waiting for his drink. What has been most surprising to me thus far has been the fact that my perception of alie... | 2021-02-22T08:45:16 | 2021-02-22T08:08:15 | 27 | 11 |
[WP] a 7 year old starts asking you questions, they start off innocent, but gradually becomes eerily specific | "Hey Mister Mark!"
I looked up from my spot in the front yard garden and saw little Lucy Stevens, the next door neighbors' kid. She was standing on the sidewalk, holding a rapidly melting Popsicle in one sticky hand.
"Heya, Lucy."
I continued digging a small hole for a new azalea shrub. She stayed where she was, w... | "Where is he?", Jeffrey muttered in a condescending voice. At least that's what I heard.
I looked towards him while releasing the drill bits trigger and removing the ear muffs. He pressed his hand against his leg, too softly to be covering an injury but too tightly to be passed off as a regular gesture. A small but lo... | 2015-01-09T07:26:14 | 2015-01-09T04:43:47 | 37 | 16 |
[WP] The protagonist has the ability to freeze time, but with two caveats: 1) he doesn't age in unfrozen time 2) he ages regularly in frozen time. | I don't know when my ability started. My parents told me I grew very quickly for a child. To the amazement of both my parents and the doctors, I started walking at just three months old. I suppose I started speaking around the same time. Everyone told me I was special, but I didn't understand what that meant.
My c... | As I unfroze time, I checked my watch. The thug in front of me seemed to spontaneously collapse, choking on his own blood. *Five seconds*, I thought to myself. *I need to go faster*.
Not waiting for the other two criminals to respond, I froze time again. The one on the left had a look of shock on his face, fumbling fo... | 2016-03-03T22:59:27 | 2016-03-03T22:24:23 | 102 | 49 |
[WP] Write erotica of hilariously bad quality.
An example of what I'm looking for would be something like this:
She flopped onto the breakfast table like a wet sock, her eyes bulging with desire. Her body was covered in nudity. "I bet I can eat more pancakes than you," she coughed, lustily.
Have fun!
EDIT: I did a ... | Constance Gluggletine relaxed into her seat, the twin battleships of her buttocks unclenching just enough for the fine hessian weave to slide up and gently abrade her anus. She breathed out a lusty sigh, luxuriating in the feeling of Clive's hands kneading the hoary juts of her shoulders.
"Ohhhh Clive", she moaned, ar... | "Are you sure you want to do this here?" Jorden Rapture McThunderBuns whispered.
"Yes. I'm sure." Kristy Lexxus O'Damn-she-fine said back.
They writhed on the table, various foods fell to the floor...*passionately.*
Patrons across the restaurant gasped in horror. The server tried to tap Jorden on the shoulder to ... | 2015-02-16T10:15:29 | 2015-02-16T09:35:35 | 131 | 27 |
[WP] Suddenly the whole world hears a voice from the sky: Hi guys, God here. I'm being promoted to the Andromeda galaxy and I'm here to introduce my replacement, Bob this is earth, earth this is Bob. Have fun, pleasure to meet you all!! | "Hey folks I was actually one of you a few years ago and I *might* have lied on my CV to get this job."
I immediately thought I'd gotten some kind of sudden schizophrenia. Good news was that I hadn't, because the next thing that happened was
"Uh... that doesn't matter anymore, I'm the ruler now. I never really under... | "Well... fuck." said the Atheists of the world
"I thought his name was Yahweh.." said others
Yet more would come to fear the days of Bob's 'tweaks'. "Nothing too huge, just want to get my own chapter in that neat book of yours!"
Armageddon might be a little harsh to wish for, but it certainly changed the religious se... | 2018-03-12T16:31:32 | 2018-03-12T15:59:20 | 1,687 | 57 |
[WP] It is discovered that our universe is a simulation. After great effort, a small team of experts manages to reach the higher dimension - only to find that this too, is a simulation. This gives rise to Dimensions Climbers: those who dare to ascend higher and higher toward the true world. | The first time I skipped -- I can only equate that first experience to something like chewing an entire sheet of quality LSD and washing it down with ayahuasca, after which the geometric elves in their hyperspace halls crack open your skull and dig their long architectural fingers into the concept of what could be your... | It started in Italy as they experimented with making molecules move in two places simultaneously. There was a point where what was to be labeled a failure turned into an unexpected success. The corresponding molecules in Germany began to rotate as those in Italy, however it was in the opposite direction.
At the Large ... | 2018-04-11T21:09:40 | 2018-04-11T21:08:50 | 16 | 11 |
[WP] You are due to be executed for your involvement in the rebellion, but the queen herself approched you in your cell to ask you a question; why are people rebelling against her rule? | As I waited in my cell, i couldn’t believe how bright and comfortable it was. Probably a special cell for death row inmates. I knew the gruesome reality of our prisons. Perhaps they can keep a handfull of them clean because their occupants don’t stay there long enough.
I heard a knock on the door.
"Yes ?" I answered... | I can't write full out that well, but here's where my mind went in a word vomit:
The Queen confronts you quietly before the execution, asking with large doe-eyes what shortcomings she has as a ruler. It's clear she has no idea how the other higher-ups treat the civilians. How they pretend the world is their own and le... | 2022-05-18T06:34:47 | 2022-05-18T03:19:37 | 38 | 19 |
[WP] Humans are one of the most feared species in the galaxy. Not due to superior strength,speed,skill or strategy. In fact, it's because in comparison to the other species, humans are just batshit crazy enough to try any half-assed plan they come up with. | "Your majesty.." The diminutive, four-legged creature said, bowing formally.
"Step forward, High Engineer Raxus. I assume you have made progress regarding the device?"
"Indeed. My team has finally replicated the software needed to access it; it contained *hours* of footage, your majesty..." He stated, before hesitat... | "Commander Trill? They're back at it."
The commander's stomach dropped when he heard his secretary's slightly muffled voice. "I'm sorry, can you repeat? Who's back at what?"
There was a pause. Trill crossed his fingers, a stupid human superstition which had spread like the plague. Maybe, just maybe-
"You know perfe... | 2017-03-06T01:24:08 | 2017-03-05T22:26:51 | 112 | 46 |
[WP]They looked at the human with horror. Within a day of the excursion, the human's skin started changing color. Then it started peeling off. Yet, aside from complaining of a little discomfort, the human seemed unconcerned, claiming it was just burns from stellar radiation. | Krr'tzk's crackling hiss cut sharply through the ceaseless, dry rumble of the desert winds over the dunes. Their long mandibular setae brushed Lou Yen's cheek, feather-light.
"That's enough, I'm fine. Hey. Seriously, stop." Yen waved his hand slowly by his face, cautious not to strike the sensitive whiskers. Krr'tzk c... | "stellar radiation my ass" said Jim the loose cannon scientist of the group. sure he was top scientist and football player at *Lacrosse University* where he got his degree in being a pimp ass scientist, but here things were different and to a guy like Jim different equals bad.
Of course I didn't know that after comin... | 2020-07-31T22:15:57 | 2020-07-31T21:43:01 | 60 | 14 |
[WP] "Why do you think we have a chance against the human race? They purge every galactic nation in their path!" The alien took a deep breath. "We are cute to them." "What?" | The Ganzodians were a fierce warrior race. Their rite of passage involved hunting down the legendary Space Phalax, a worm species that took root in moons and ate entire ships. They lived for a beautiful death. To a Ganzodian, there was nothing more shameful than being captured in battle. But Klaptac knew that to be fal... | Grand Chancellor Percy stepped around the podium body now visible to the Council. Percy clicked the button of the device he held switching the monitor to a 3D image of a human holding one of their infamous light cannons.
"The Humans have few weaknesses, they are marginally worse than the Disepatoids we dealt with eons... | 2017-12-19T07:29:47 | 2017-12-19T07:24:56 | 158 | 44 |
[WP] You are a Squib who mastered a vast repertoire of Muggle magic tricks to finagle Hogwarts into sending you a letter. Everything goes smoothly, until it is time for the Sorting Ceremony... | "This is strange." I began to fidget on the stool. "I havent had one this difficult to read in over 25 years" I nervously wiped my palms on the fold of my robe. "Ahhhh, you aren't meant to be here. You're a muggle" The hat began to feel heavier on my head. All my hard work, foiled by the bloody sorting hat. It looked a... | As the hat was placed upon me, a cold dread overcame my entire body. And this time it wasn't a senior prankster from Slytherin. As the hat wiggled around my head, the halls were dead silent. Something was obviously wrong. The hat had never taken this long to make a decision. Dumbledore sat at his chair, mildly amused. ... | 2017-06-25T15:03:55 | 2017-06-25T13:48:53 | 56 | 33 |
[WP] At the age of 18 humans are divided into districts based on their looks (Scale 1-10). You just turned 18 and are being ranked, however no-one can decide whether you are a 1 or a 10. | "Ouch! What the hell was that for?"
A stocky man quickly pulled his finger away from my ear, which he had just pinched.
"Sorry, we do that to everyone like you. If a decision is too hard, we will sometimes resort to 'texture,'" he said. I was... unconvinced. I had been in the Councilroom for many hours over the past... | "*He is a 10!*", shouted the representative of 'All Extremely Good Looking People'.
"Look at his nose! That is **NOT** a nose. That is a beat-up sausage link that this boy breaths out of" as the representative of 'Mildly Average People' pointed and examined my nose. "Furthermore, look at his teeth! Even people in Eng... | 2015-07-29T11:05:11 | 2015-07-29T09:30:40 | 58 | 27 |
[WP] It's your first day as the recently-inaugurated President of the United States and you're being told all of the country's most top-secret information and projects. What's the most unbelievable thing you get told? | "That's it?" I asked. I was still confused. Unbelievable.
"Yep. That's it." My "aide" smiled. It was a genuine smile, a happy smile that spoke of only optimism. God, I wanted to wipe that grin off his face. Probably fake too, with this asshole's espionage background.
"Unbelievable," I put my head in my hands. "Un-fuc... | "Ok, WHAT?" I couldn't believe I heard General Anderson correctly. "There's a fully staffed Starbucks down there?"
"Oh yes, Sir. Not only that, but two ice cream shops and a four-star Italian place."
I apparently *had* heard him correctly. I closed my hanging jaw and tried to form my next thought. The White House nuc... | 2014-09-18T16:04:16 | 2014-09-18T11:48:42 | 33 | 16 |
[WP]Killing Hitler has become a sport amongst time travelers. Points are awarded for creativity and difficulty. You are last year's champion, how did you win? | The Hitler Games have been a huge hit when it became public in the 24th century. Sure, in the past people did it just for fun. Then came the betting of "Hey, betcha I can kill Hitler better than you." People put hundreds, then thousands of dollars to try and one-up each other on this simple task. The end result was the... | "I am the Fuhrer. I demand you release me."
"And you've been a bad boy, Adolf," I whispered in his ear. "I'm here to punish you."
He looked around the hotel room. Strapped to the bed, he cut a pitiful figure. I could see a change come over him and his mustache started to quiver.
"Who are you?"
"Annabel Goldschmidt,... | 2016-02-20T10:56:09 | 2016-02-20T08:49:24 | 596 | 147 |
[WP] You are the final boss. You have been waiting for the final epic battle against the hero. And waiting. And waiting. Finally, your minions report back. The news? The hero abandoned the main quest to do side quests. | "So... this is accurate? This "Hero" they've summoned simply takes on any request given, at any time, and completes it come hell or high water before doing anything else?"
"This seems to be the case, sir. Our honeypot attempted to understand the reason he refuses to abandon a task, but the response wasn't very clear. ... | "Bring him to me." He said. Clenching his tightly armored fist. Several subserviants kneeled before him, trembling.
"My liege, the warrior," he hesitated, licking his dry lips and looking to the others for reassurance, "he has trailed off course."
The blood thirsty king took two small steps forward, towering over the... | 2019-06-26T12:46:02 | 2019-06-26T11:26:18 | 80 | 10 |
[WP] You're that guy that always "knows a guy." Literally. No matter what someone is asking for, you automatically know the person that can help them. | I sat in the darkly lit room alone. The only light in here was from a dim lamp and the little bit of light at the end of my cigarette. I shifted slightly, the cheap velvet couch I was sitting on was uncomfortable, probably because it's a near hundred years old at this point. But my buddy Damon is making me a new one, s... | Most people thinks it’s a big deal that Jake knows everyone. It really wasn’t. He dealt with it everyday.
“Does anyone know a painter?” Someone would ask
“I know a guy.” Jake always sighed
Everyone needed somebody to do something. Jake always knew a guy. No one questioned it. Everyone has friends, everyone knew at leas... | 2019-06-21T11:24:38 | 2019-06-21T10:22:22 | 16 | 12 |
[WP] You've been cursed so that whenever you pick up a tool you will lose consciousness but wake up after finishing a project related to that tool, you just picked up a bow hoping to get some hunting done, when you wake up, you're sitting on a throne. | My eyes pried open as if they'd been sealed for a thousand years, rusted shut. The light of awareness stung them, and I felt sand. A lot of sand, whirling about me; rough, coarse and everywhere. Every breath left my mouth grainy.
There was a man kneeled in front of me, robes stuck to him with sweat, baking under the m... | Two years, two years and he thought that he knew his ‘curse’, pick up the hammer, get some smithing done. Pick up the knife, food prepared. Pick up the pick axe, and resources are his. But when he picks up his bow he always wakes up with more food, he was beginning to think it wasn’t a curse, but a miracle.
His town k... | 2019-04-16T20:15:54 | 2019-04-16T15:11:35 | 3,610 | 340 |
[WP] What if tattoos just randomly appeared on our skin at key points in our lives and we had to figure out what they meant for ourselves.
[WP] Saw this as a shower thoughts post and no one put it up as a writing prompt. Credit to OP 69PrivateJoker
Edit: Wow! I really didn't expect this post to blow up so much. Thank... | Nowadays it's an industry. Glorified fortune-tellers and old-fashioned crackpots, trying to tell us what it all means. In my opinion, humanity would have been better off if it had never started happening. All the tattoos did was tempt you to try and mess with the future. The worst part was they could never be wrong, be... | He stood there, staring intently at the reflection of his naked body. His father, grandfather, and great grandfather all had a tattoo appear on their breast in the first moments of their respective 24th birthdays. It has been three minutes already, and yet nothing has appeared on Qi-wei's body.
"You'll feel a strong, ... | 2014-08-02T17:31:06 | 2014-08-02T17:11:15 | 51 | 34 |
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