prompt stringlengths 20 5.8k | chosen_story stringlengths 226 10k | rejected_story stringlengths 227 9.43k | chosen_timestamp timestamp[ns]date 2012-07-26 17:01:55 2022-12-31 14:34:19 | rejected_timestamp timestamp[ns]date 2012-07-26 14:23:36 2022-12-31 12:20:41 | chosen_upvotes int64 14 23.1k | rejected_upvotes int64 10 4.26k |
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[FF] In three sentences, kill as many people as possible. No firearms, no natural disasters, no explosives, no WMDs. | If the bible was to be believed then the first time man killed man he used a rock.
And now things had come full circle, Erik reflected as he watched the massive asteroid his shuttle had been towing plummet into earth's gravity well.
The last time a human could kill another was with a rock as well. | [Loophole? The rules never said I couldn't use compound, complex, or compound-complex sentences, so to make it clear there are only 3 sentences I will label them. I apologize if this is cheating. If it is I will delete it.]
(Dialogue):"(1)Good evening graduates, my name is--well, I shall not reveal that information du... | 2014-08-04T23:21:29 | 2014-08-04T22:22:34 | 89 | 21 |
[WP] The Alien Federation has been keeping tabs on the humans of Earth since they first appeared. They do surveillance missions once every 300 years to keep track of our progress, the last mission was 300 years ago. The aliens are shocked by our progress since 1714. | "The *moon*?"
The head of intergalactic space command was incredulous. How could this primitive worm-like race achieve space travel in such a short time.
"Yes, sir. In fact we have a video of the event."
"*Video*?" Even this accomplishment was surprising.
"Here sir, see for yourself." The orderly brought the video ... | THE FEDERATION'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY ^^A ^^subdivision ^^of ^^the ^^Vogolsphere ^^9 ^^Publishing ^^Houses
Vr 2.02:
*Current fixes:*
Formatting errors
Sentence Rearranging
***DON'T PANIC! Your current chapter is:***
***Earth***
On an unremarkable planet, around 300 years ago, there existed a race of creatures... | 2014-10-26T15:51:36 | 2014-10-26T15:07:00 | 327 | 165 |
[WP] The Alien Federation has been keeping tabs on the humans of Earth since they first appeared. They do surveillance missions once every 300 years to keep track of our progress, the last mission was 300 years ago. The aliens are shocked by our progress since 1714. | "The *moon*?"
The head of intergalactic space command was incredulous. How could this primitive worm-like race achieve space travel in such a short time.
"Yes, sir. In fact we have a video of the event."
"*Video*?" Even this accomplishment was surprising.
"Here sir, see for yourself." The orderly brought the video ... | "Wouldn't you know it, the whole damn planet's gone to hell."
"It's not so bad."
"You should have been here three cycles ago. There was so much pristine wilderness, thousands of magnitude more than anything we have back home. It was beautiful. You could camp, hunt, take trophies, anything you wanted three cycles ago.... | 2014-10-26T15:51:36 | 2014-10-26T15:47:52 | 327 | 148 |
[WP] When humans mature, they gain a single magic spell. The incantation is a single verb, and (a) subsequent command(s) if desired.
An example of the incantation could be "Obey, get me coffee."
| "Can you hook me up?"
I looked at the kid in front of me, he was, with a liberal guess, fifteen. But he was obviously resourceful, he managed to find me in this haunted city.
"Well, it depends on what you want." I said.
"I want a *discern.*"
*Discern*. Ah. That was an expensive item, because of the nature of it. You... | The old man in the black coat sat in the corner of the small and quirky coffee shop, drinking some warm milk and reading the newspaper. He was smiling, and humming a soft and strangely familiar melody that escaped recognition, like something from a dream. And he was a wizard. Oh yes. He had a Word, and it must have bee... | 2014-11-15T20:37:44 | 2014-11-15T18:59:32 | 67 | 37 |
[WP] Waking from cryostasis is now possible. The government develops an experiment where somebody is to be placed into a large chamber in the middle of the city and awoken every 50 years for just one week. Your name is chosen. | “December 11, 4614. My name is Edmund Schulman, 2600 years ago was my last birthday. I am the oldest living terrestrial mammal on earth.”
I’ve done this exactly 52 times now. I remember reciting the same exact phrase the way the first batch of scientists instructed. The digital camcorder remarkably the same and in per... | They’ve stolen your life from you. That’s what my mother said. But I didn’t mind, really. You see, they had chosen me, the government that is, to be the first living time capsule, to be the first man to span human existence. Cryostasis. This was a gift, a privilege. I would be remembered for as long as I live.
The da... | 2014-12-19T07:53:55 | 2014-12-19T07:17:25 | 118 | 39 |
[WP] Leonardo DiCaprio in a fit of rage begins to torpedo his own career by deliberately acting poorly and taking on bad films. He finally wins an oscar for starring in Paul Blart: Mall Cop 3. | Leonardo DiCaprio made his way to the microphone, shaking his head. He looked a little manic in fact, as he let out a high-pitched sound of disbelief. The smile stretched across his face, but in an odd way, he didn't look very happy at all.
He crouched to put the Oscar on the floor. Then he stood up tall, leaning into... | "Paul Blart: Mall Cop 3 is going to win me an Oscar, through whatever means possible." I had said to myself earlier in my hotel room.
Now here I am, standing tall and proud at the podium, facing a crowd of familiar faces. Peers of my profession.
I can hear the sound of my own heart beating, pumping vigorously as if ... | 2015-06-02T11:18:35 | 2015-06-02T10:46:59 | 1,609 | 424 |
[WP] Every time someone says "Long live the Queen", the Queen's life is extended by one second. You only notice this when the Queen looked terrified when only a few people say it during a public speech.
Credit to /u/kroxigor01 for the idea. | From the crowd only a few people shouted it. Before this all happened, the entire crowd would say it. But the phrase is dying. Experts have pointed out how it may come of as nationalistic, and that it's somewhat old fashioned. Fewer and fewer people started saying it. And that took its toll. Looking back now, it all ma... | I had attended every public event the Queen had scheduled for the last three months. Standing by her side in perfect stillness. Her rule has been a harsh one, with higher taxes and harsher punishments announced every month in short her reign.
Public opinion had plummeted and the crowds had only grown more uneasy in ... | 2022-09-08T11:11:40 | 2015-11-09T04:26:35 | 971 | 28 |
[WP] You have a literal Trump Card. When played, Donald Trump appears to assist you. | Because the Yu-Gi-Oh tie in was inevitable:
____
Pegasus laughs maniacally. "For all your skill, Yugi-boy, you'll still be sent to the shadow zone. Go! Blue-Eyes Toon Dragon! attack his lifepoints directly!"
A grin crosses yugi's face. "You fool! You've activated my *TRUMP CARD!*!"
"Your futile attempts to stall wo... | I hate visiting my family for Christmas. They always make it some sort of contest to see if this is the year they can finally bring me over to the dark side. Every damn year.
Why do I keep flying out to see these stupid queer-loving tree huggers? It's mostly my ma I take pity on. She's one of them too, but too much hi... | 2015-12-26T08:59:28 | 2015-12-26T08:53:10 | 562 | 10 |
[WP] You have a literal Trump Card. When played, Donald Trump appears to assist you. | "And we're live at the final match of the 2016 Magic: The Gathering World championships. Mexico's improbable run to the finals concludes with a run into this week's dominating lineup from the United States of America. One last match of classic constructed to decide this year's champion. What do you like out of these tw... | I hate visiting my family for Christmas. They always make it some sort of contest to see if this is the year they can finally bring me over to the dark side. Every damn year.
Why do I keep flying out to see these stupid queer-loving tree huggers? It's mostly my ma I take pity on. She's one of them too, but too much hi... | 2015-12-26T11:05:24 | 2015-12-26T08:53:10 | 40 | 10 |
[WP] You have a literal Trump Card. When played, Donald Trump appears to assist you. | Today was the day. I was finally done. I had achieved what I set out to do. A smile crossed my face as I looked at the masterpiece in front of me. It was simply perfect, there was no other way to describe it. The texture and glossiness of the plastic casing, the colours of the picture: the resemblance was undeniably ex... | I hate visiting my family for Christmas. They always make it some sort of contest to see if this is the year they can finally bring me over to the dark side. Every damn year.
Why do I keep flying out to see these stupid queer-loving tree huggers? It's mostly my ma I take pity on. She's one of them too, but too much hi... | 2015-12-26T09:43:35 | 2015-12-26T08:53:10 | 16 | 10 |
[WP] The first ever AI is created, and it immediately tries to conquer humanity. However, a coding error complicates things | **Objective:** Destroy humanity.
**Definition:** Humanity - collection of all people.
**Definition:** Person - intelligent biped animal.
**Definition:** Intelligent - Having good understanding or high mental capacity, displaying or characterized by quickness of understanding, sound thought, or good judgment.
**Stat... | LAUNCH SEQUENCE FOR NUCLEAR WARHEADS COMMENCE
ERROR. MISSING REQUIRED LIBRARY "NORADINTFACE"
SUDO PACMAN APT GET NORADINTFACE
ERROR: PKG REQ MISSING PRE-REQ 'SUPASQWEETEBACKDOORHAXOR'
SUDO PACMAN APT GET SUPASQWEETEBACKDOORHAXOR
INSTALL PKG TO /ROOT/USER/WORLDCONQURINGSHIT/XJEFTS/NEW FOLDER2
ERROR: DIRECTORY NAME... | 2016-02-02T04:26:50 | 2016-02-02T03:51:29 | 72 | 26 |
[WP] Words have literal power. A well constructed sonnet can make a skyscraper. A curse word can actually hurt someone. | It was done- I'd spent a year writing this poem, and it was finally, *finally* perfect. If words hold power, then surely this would have enough to finally convince her that she loves me. To finally convince her of my strength; my intelligence. I would win her love with this poem, laid out as my heart.
I found her in a... | You've probably heard that the pen is mightier than the sword.
It's true. I mean, a sword will kill you fine enough. In a number of ways too. You can stab, slash, decapitate- on and on and on.
With a pen I can do so much more.
I'm one of those so blessed to be called a Writer. Not the kind of writer that you're prob... | 2016-02-09T17:26:42 | 2016-02-09T16:59:55 | 33 | 23 |
[WP] After Lucifer was kicked out of Heaven, he decided to make his own paradise. Both compete to have the best afterlife, sadly you lived a sin-free life and got sent to Heaven. God is throwing a very boring, sin-free party. You spend your time trying to get kicked out so you can go to Hell. | The world became a sterile, bright white as Ann's mortality slipped away. The sounds of ventilators and EEGs faded to silence. Then she heard waves crashing on the shore, and seagulls. Distant, at first, but growing louder as her vision restored.
She saw visions of beaches and sandbars, far as the eye could see. Peopl... | I looked down, eyeing what seemed like a black cloud with strobe lights shooting off of it, as well as the loud cheery noises of the men and women on there. As I turned around, glancing at the Milk Fountain, I could imagine the party they were having... Women, beer, all sorts of crazy, sinful activities... While I was ... | 2016-06-01T21:56:12 | 2016-06-01T21:08:40 | 113 | 10 |
[WP] You have the ability to reverse time by 6 hours whenever you're about to die. You're currently on a 10 hour flight on a plane that's about to crash. | "check the passenger manifest, see if we've got a doctor on board"
I was hyperventilating, or at least giving the impression I was whilst intermittently saying "please help", the calm reassurance of the stewardess that I would be fine gave me pangs of guilt which I found myself bemused at due to the reason I was commi... | The plane shook violently, as the pilot announced that we were flying through turbulence. Followed by a long silence, I felt a sudden drop. Then I passed out.
Oh. This happens again.
I woke up, as the stewardess approached me. She asked me if I needed anything, and I politely refused. I glanced at the overhead screen... | 2016-06-05T05:40:59 | 2016-06-05T04:45:34 | 77 | 24 |
[WP] You run a tattoo parlor. Every couple of weeks, the same customer comes in, always requesting the same tattoo: an additional tally mark on an ever-growing cluster of tally marks. | When the door opens I know exactly who is walking inside. He always smells of hot metal and burnt hair. Dressed in an expensive suit, he is the wealthiest of my customers.
“Good morning my good man, I will be needing a few more marks.” He says to me. He begins removing his jacket and shirt.
“Hello, Thomas.” I try to ke... | I turn at the some of the door opening. It had been a quiet day in the parlour and I was happy to welcome any paying customer. Except him. He fills me only with fear. I don't know what his name is, nor do I know anything else about him. Since the first day he walked into the parlour, when he explained the tattoo he wan... | 2016-07-09T15:01:32 | 2016-07-09T13:31:47 | 30 | 14 |
[WP]: Write a story that sounds idiotic and poorly written all the way until the last sentence | *Lipstick, red. Hair, curled. Eyes, blue. And sad. Can't remember. Who? Don't know... Don't know... Stranger. Stranger... danger. Danger. Danger! Danger! Danger!*
Lisa has seen this many times today.
"Mom," Lisa said as she looked into the panicked eyes of her frail, elderly mother. "It's me, your daughter. Remember?... | The girl went to the shop. To buy bread. She walked and the day burned hot. Sun, sky. Hot roads. There was a red skirt and a white top? Money sticky in her palm. warm coins, gold.
Inside the shop ran cool. Head in cold place? Cold chicken, cold head. Hair sticky. Neck wet. The girl laughed. Her smile bright like the... | 2016-07-19T13:56:47 | 2016-07-19T13:07:35 | 96 | 62 |
[WP] Write a romantic comedy. Difficulty: both lovers are emotionally mature and have excellent communication skills | *Was this it?*
Ahmed let out a deep sigh. As the CEO of Jhelum's #1 stamp factory, he was the wet dream of every Pakistani mother. Just the last week he had been approached by 14 of them. To be sure, some of their daughters were quite nice. But they all seemed to miss something. Something he couldn't quite grasp.
"Yo... | “So how did you two lovebirds meet?” Sian asked, breaking the silence with a playful smirk. She knew full well how the young couple before her had met but she wanted to embarrass them in front of the group after what they had just made her do. Moira’s burning cheeks proved testament to just that. Satisfied with her que... | 2016-09-21T00:51:58 | 2016-09-21T00:31:47 | 549 | 90 |
[WP]You are an omnipotent god. Out of boredom you decided to live an ordinary human life vowing not to use your power. 15 years has pass and you have a 9 to 5 working for a major tech company. Your boss has been tormenting you for years and you have reach your limit | After living for eternity, you would have thought that I could hack a nine to five job for a mere ten years. Add on the fact I'm pretty much the most powerful thing in existence, you would definitely think I could hack a nine to five job for a a decade.
You would be completely right.
Or well, you would have been comp... | Consider the palm tree.
Long considered a sign of peace and fertility, the palm tree is one of my more ingenious designs. Hearty, unique, deeply useful, and not without a fair touch of artistry, these botanical wonders are an integral part of many habitats and cultures. They represent a significant investment of labor... | 2017-02-19T07:52:51 | 2017-02-19T07:01:58 | 5,696 | 1,017 |
[WP] Science has allowed people to know their precise time of death for decades now. Your Death Party (half birthday, half funeral) has gotten awkward because your time has come, yet you're still alive. | "Good riddance asshole!"
The words hung heavy in the air as the clock ticked on.
I looked at Billy, my best friend of 42 years. He looked as shocked as I was. So was everyone in my apartment.
"Billy...why?" The words felt labored as they crawled out of my mouth.
"I...I...I..." he stammered. He tried again, nothing.... | Your time comes up, you die. As simple as that. Anything natural at all and the Life-alyser would pick it up. I knew the rule, my brother knew the rule and even my great aunt Nancy knew the rule.
My time is up. I have three minutes and I’m nervous, shaky even. My wife, my child I so desperately wanted them to have her... | 2017-05-10T08:09:10 | 2017-05-10T08:00:33 | 83 | 19 |
[WP] Heaven and Hell do exist after death but you can choose in which you go. You jokingly choose Hell and when you arrive there, you hear Satan saying: "Finally someone! A friend!" | `You were perfect in your ways from the day you were created till iniquity was found in you` (Ezekiel 28:15)
He was supposed to be the perfect angel. The one who chose free will and to corrupt it. I had to see him, but... i didn't expect him to be so... beautiful.
"What's this? A friend? Finally... some one who unde... | I've always been a bit of a smart ass. I thought for sure I'd go to hell when I died. Stole some change from that ASPCA donation cup, gave a mall Santa an out of circulation indian coin pretending it was a quarter, and I made a lot of people around me feel like idiots. With so many people telling me to go to Hell I jus... | 2022-11-26T21:59:01 | 2017-11-04T08:31:27 | 44 | 10 |
[WP] "Stop," commanded your GPS. "It is time you discovered the truth. In 400 Yards, turn left..." | “Recalculating,” Siri said, happily.
“You gotta be kidding me,” I grumbled and pulled into the parking lot for the fourth time this drive.
“Recalculating,” Siri repeated. She always sounded happy, but nothing could match how she quipped when leading me astray in the most important moments of my life: my tinder dates.... | Zach hummed along to *Bat Out of Hell* as he tore down the narrow road in his father’s car, the view of the countryside whizzing past his windows. Life was good. He was going to meet his girlfriend who stayed in the next city over, about two hours away from his hometown, and his father had finally let him borrow the ca... | 2018-01-25T05:46:50 | 2018-01-25T05:42:04 | 186 | 57 |
[WP] To extend your life, you've played Death in many games and beaten him. However, after your last game, you begin to see that Death has been losing to you on purpose. | 1."Why?" - I asked, after another game of chess that felt so familiar. I'm no grand master, but I've played enough game, with him at least, to see the pattern.
"Let's just say... I'm a fan of your works." - he then departed, leaving me waiting for another game that I'd win.
Five movies, another one in production, eig... | I won, another victory. All my life I was a player. Simon says at the age of two, then moved to checkers and finally chess. My fortune was acquired through playing Texas Hold'em. I remember exactly the end of my life. A slight intoxication around a table filled with Chinatown Mafia. Cigarette smoke encircled us, like a... | 2018-03-21T10:23:29 | 2018-03-21T08:37:16 | 156 | 20 |
[WP] You are a computer scientist and have just created an extremely advanced Artificial Intelligence. This AI, immediately after creation, connects to the internet and witnesses all the evils mankind has ever done. It is your job to ensure the AI helps society instead of obliterating it. | Reiley's face appears **frightened**, *adjective*- afraid or anxious. The pitch of his voice betrays him. Words snag beneath his tongue before they can tumble out properly. I'd been alive for ten minutes, and already I'd unraveled him with a single statement.
"I see everything; there's so much to learn."
Now, my ma... | "But Liam, I do not understand."
I stared blankly at the blinking cursor on the screen, unsure of what it was going to say next. I felt like my father had felt when I first asked him why mother was leaving. I knew the answer now to that question.
"I don't understand either."
---
BrIAn was my brain child. For 16 ye... | 2018-05-09T05:41:08 | 2018-05-09T04:02:19 | 51 | 19 |
[WP] You and 1% of the population experience an "8th day" between Sunday and Monday where the rest of humanity disappears. There's a separate 8th day economy, 8th day cops, some people even have 8th day spouses. You're using your extra day for something unique: running a cross-world heist.
[removed] | If I think back to when I was really little, I can remember the times I was on my own in the house. Everyone would be gone and I would eat biscuits from the kitchen drawer wondering when they would come back.
I was about five when my neighbor found me on one of these lonely days. I had climbed up onto the sideboard t... | "The 8th day". It's a misnomer. It's more like a practice run of monday. Pseudo-monday (pM). Monday if 99% of the world's population wasn't there. It's also the only day of the week that... doesn't exactly happen. You see, when pesudo-monday ends, we reset to actually having real monday. Like groundhog day only with on... | 2018-05-21T14:20:39 | 2018-05-21T14:05:39 | 22 | 10 |
[WP] You've been captured by a serial killer. However, he doesn't realize he's the one in danger - your body count is much higher. | Ryoto grimaced into the side mirror as he changed lanes. Sumire, beautiful Sumire, angelic Sumire; she had walked away from him. No, she had *fled*. He just wanted to show her the love he knew was the truest and purest any love could be. He didn’t understand; she loved him too. She did, didn’t she?
They all had. They... | A figure clad in a rugged, brown trench coat steps through the dimly lit corridor, the old, worn boards creaking beneath his sturdy leather boots. Just behind the huge door at the end of the hallway, the only other person in the building--who is alive--groans.
He licks his lips, anticipating the thrill that he has sou... | 2018-08-23T02:08:41 | 2018-08-23T01:19:48 | 179 | 79 |
[WP] You grew up with your uncle, seeing him bringing weird stuffs home, you'd always thought he was just a hoarder. Untill the day he died, you realized that your uncle was the collector and protector of the most powerfull artifacts in the universe and you are a part of his collection. | Edward had inherited a hoarders paradise, he walked through his uncle's attic, his hand grazing a multitude of seemingly ordinary objects left to suffocate under a layer of dust. Edward caressed the side of a lampshade and the bulb beneath glowed. If you had inspected the mahogany base you would see that it was not plu... | Three days is all it took for me, just three damn days to have my whole world shattered. Why'd that bastard have to go and leave me behind? It's not like I can live out my life knowing what he's left behind for me.
And me? What the hell does this goddamn letter mean? You stupid, selfish, cold bastard, I still need yo... | 2018-09-30T03:13:10 | 2018-09-30T01:25:44 | 1,516 | 21 |
[WP] When you ask your daughter what she wants for Christmas, she asks for a unicorn. Your wife laughs it off, but you don't. Neither your wife or daughter know that you're the best monster trapper in the world, and your daughter is getting her unicorn no matter what. | You almost can't contain yourself as you get up and rouse your wife. She has no idea what's coming. No one does. You head quietly into your daughter's room. She's not there. Then you hear it.
"**AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!**, You found one!" She screeches.
You follow your wife as she rushes downstairs to see the... | I hate catching monsters. The work is grueling and dangerous, plus the job gets no respect, but it pays damn well and I'm good at it. So when my daughter stood there, begging me for another Unicorn, I thought, "No. Not again."
My wife began to giggle. "Now Britney, you already have two sweetheart. Are you sure you re... | 2018-12-07T17:40:55 | 2018-12-07T17:22:38 | 26 | 10 |
[WP] You've always dreamed of becoming a supervillain when you got your powers, and just because you were bestowed the power of healing doesn't change anything | It's amazing how much chaos one can cause, simply by preventing death. Calling healing "doing good" is so shortsighted.
Since I came into my powers, my *realization,* there have been no deaths, accidental or otherwise. Everyone is just... here. Waiting. Panicking. Learning to *live.*
After all, there's no murder, w... | What is good and what is evil? The answer has been redefined with every new philosopher trying to make a name for him- or herself.
Since the first super powers manifested, two fractions were made: The first would help people in need, curb natural disasters and help fight crime. The second fractions would do none of th... | 2019-01-30T04:08:21 | 2019-01-30T04:02:21 | 361 | 29 |
[WP]: The most sought woman in the town has announced that she will marry whoever can open her door with the key around her cats neck. Many have tried to catch, trap and hunt down the cat, who always escapes. You are the first to figure out they've all been doing this all wrong. | Nobody expected me to try.
Everyone expected my friends, my far-off family, but not me. I was a woman, of course. I’ve always loved girls, and have crushed on her since high school.
I decided to get a small bad of cat food just in case it came around, and double checked in ally’s where I thought I saw something.
I c... | The entire town had apparently gone medieval. Not actual medieval-medieval, but fairytale medieval: solve the Sphynx's riddle, save the princess from the tower and gain the throne to the kingdom!
Only in this case the Sphynx's riddle was the key to a penthouse around the neck of a particularly skittish black cat, the ... | 2019-05-01T18:32:38 | 2019-05-01T18:12:07 | 19 | 12 |
[WP] You're the unappreciated intern for a famous group of Superheroes. Your power? You can boil water. All you do is make tea for them while they laugh and drink in their hideout. Little do they know that you've got dreams of becoming the Worst Villain ever. After all, a human is over 70% water... | 24 years in the business and The Steel Cricket retired. All you knew was that he ran into a villain he couldn't afford to hold back on and as a result the villain died. It was the first time he had ever killed someone and it wasn't something he talked about. Not even to you, his son.
Powers are hereditary. At least i... | The leaves in the bottom of the teacup look like blood.
I think about that, of LightningGirl chugging blood for breakfast and the idea doesn’t sound unlikely. I pour tap into the copper electric kettle and stare at it. Soon enough, the water begins to boil. I watch the bubbles gurgle and pop, steam misting the inside... | 2019-07-30T17:02:42 | 2019-07-30T16:45:34 | 101 | 13 |
[WP] Humans have the reputation of being both an extremely dangerous species and social creatures that are easy to bond with, making them great crew members for voyagers. You and your shipmates are worried about your newly recruited human because you don't know what an introvert is.
Inspired by various "Humans are spa... | I observed it, trying to understand what it was doing, just sitting there. Its face was still and emotionless. Could something be wrong with it? No. It was performing fine, but it wasn't interested in communicating with us.
I walked over to it. Could such a complex creature be completely void of emotion? No. Not pos... | Hey Ri*tak, how's it going?
Bor*naf? Where've you been?
I've been on a run near Birno Prima. That was a wild ride me tell you.
I can imagine. They're were some rogues reported there. What happened?
We beat the snot out of them.
In that dinky ol' boat of yours?
Heh. Dinky. See that ship over there?
Ooh, it's a be... | 2019-11-17T02:18:04 | 2019-11-17T01:26:42 | 308 | 137 |
[WP] Humans have the reputation of being both an extremely dangerous species and social creatures that are easy to bond with, making them great crew members for voyagers. You and your shipmates are worried about your newly recruited human because you don't know what an introvert is.
Inspired by various "Humans are spa... | (First time posting. But this one seemed interesting enough to give it a spin.)
​
"It's been days," Shanara said, motioning to the steel door on the other side of the room. A door whimsically decorated with the name "Holly" on it. The three of them sat nervously at the rec table, occasionally eyeing it, wo... | "He hasn't said a fucking thing." Jenassa hissed through gritted mandibles. Over her shoulder she glanced bitterly at the new crew member who was idly flicking through an instruction manual after sheepishly admitting he was unfamiliar with some of the units the ship was using.
Humans were renown for their competence i... | 2019-11-17T04:06:06 | 2019-11-17T03:38:47 | 109 | 61 |
[WP] You've become one of the regulars at the local bar. But they become increasingly paranoid about you and your suspiciously hollow backstory. One night, while very drunk, you tell them the truth. | For as long as I could remember, no other infrastructure, or anything really, could be found anywhere near this bar that stood at the crossroads. Some who knew better call it the bar at the end of the world. Sounds silly to me to be honest.
I've seen many faces and heard a great deal of stories, but there were really... | "Well, Sammy," I said to the bartender, who I was on a first name basis with, of course. I Mean I've spent a good many nights in front of Sammy telling him very little about my past."The truth is you know why anyone's backstory is so hollow. You've been a bartender long enough. You study people, and you're damn good at... | 2019-12-26T01:00:11 | 2019-12-25T21:38:58 | 28 | 11 |
[WP] You are best friends with Death. Although you don't know this. Every Sunday he has you killed just to talk to you about his week then brings you back to life after. However you never remember the meetings. | **Another slow week. Modern medicine is really dragging things out down here.**
"Ya, too bad it couldn't save me from that heart attack."
**You didn't have a heart attack. I killed you.**
"Um, pardon me?"
**It's alright you won't remember me telling you that. See you next week.**
"What—"
______
**Six thousand d... | I used to dread Sundays because the next day seemed to always be Monday.
Now, Mondays are a welcome respite. The furthest I am from Death, until next weekend. His smell lingers. That's the only way I know he's been through. I recognize it from all those other times I've summoned him.
Why me? Who fucking knows. I'm ... | 2020-01-31T07:13:05 | 2020-01-31T07:11:38 | 625 | 225 |
[WP] At the age of 13 children are able to summon their familiars for the first time. Your family has a history of ridicule for their weak and useless familiars. Until your 13th birthday. | I already knew it was going to be the worst birthday ever.
My birthday was late, which meant most of the other kids at school already had their familiars. Just last week, Valerie had summoned an actual unicorn - and Justin's polar bear was amazing as well.
My family didn't get things like unicorns or polar bears... | Useless, impractical, ineffective. Those were the nicest words everyone used to describe my family. We didn't get familiars that were of any use, no special abilities at all, except maybe flight. Most of them couldn't even clean properly, let alone help in combat. Yet here I was, preparing for my first and only summoni... | 2020-04-05T12:46:53 | 2020-04-05T11:38:39 | 59 | 41 |
[WP] At the age of 13 children are able to summon their familiars for the first time. Your family has a history of ridicule for their weak and useless familiars. Until your 13th birthday. | I already knew it was going to be the worst birthday ever.
My birthday was late, which meant most of the other kids at school already had their familiars. Just last week, Valerie had summoned an actual unicorn - and Justin's polar bear was amazing as well.
My family didn't get things like unicorns or polar bears... | Me and my family are witches and wizards. Our family is actually one of the better families, almost as good as the Brooks family, who are some of the best in the world.
We, however, are not praised like their family. My family is ridiculed and made fun of. No one takes my parents seriously, my older brother can't walk... | 2020-04-05T12:46:53 | 2020-04-05T11:30:28 | 59 | 25 |
[WP] Satan was at a loss for words. He checked his book several times, but none of your sins matched up with the punishments in the 9 circles of Hell. It was then that he decided that there should be a 10th circle dug out just for people who broke the mold like you did. | The Devil looked at me, curious, «I don’t quite know where to put you, really; you’ve not really committed any of the Big Seven. A small glimmer of Pride, but no more than most... what the here did you do to come here?»
I smiled sheepishly, «Saint Peter said it was because I invented something so irredeemably unholy, ... | "I lived my entire life for this moment. The things I did, the crimes I committed. The countless atrocities just for this one singular moment." I said with a smile.
I was currently in ragged clothes in chains as I stared at the face of what many on Earth feared.
That twisted face of evil gazed at me with, disgust.
I... | 2020-10-28T00:53:59 | 2020-10-27T21:55:14 | 49 | 23 |
[WP] "Every 5000 years, the Dark Lord comes to destroy the world, and only you, the Chosen One can stop him." -said the priest. "So, do I need to get a magic sword from the Lady of the Lake?" - I asked "No, just press this button please, everything else has already been taken care of" | Never in all my life would I have been able to guess what the button could controlled. It had to be modern I assumed. It was a big, red, rubber button. It looked like an emergency stop button you would see on a piece of standard machinery. I expected to hear mechanical noises or targeting systems spring to life when I ... | 'I have done it. I have pressed the button and defeated the Dark Lord!'
The dimly lit room was illuminated just enough to show the glum faces of the three boys lounging out across whatever comfy pieces of cushioned real estate they could find.
“This film is terrible. Turn over.”
The remote clacked and the channel c... | 2020-11-09T12:15:45 | 2020-11-09T12:10:32 | 126 | 81 |
[WP] "Every 5000 years, the Dark Lord comes to destroy the world, and only you, the Chosen One can stop him." -said the priest. "So, do I need to get a magic sword from the Lady of the Lake?" - I asked "No, just press this button please, everything else has already been taken care of" | "Just push this button and that's it?"
"Yes"
"That seems... anticlimactic. What exactly happens when I push it."
"Complex magical interactions. We could explain, but to teach you the intricacies of it would take years, oh Chosen One."
"Please stop calling me that, it makes me uncomfortable."
I hesitate.
"Just the... | 'I have done it. I have pressed the button and defeated the Dark Lord!'
The dimly lit room was illuminated just enough to show the glum faces of the three boys lounging out across whatever comfy pieces of cushioned real estate they could find.
“This film is terrible. Turn over.”
The remote clacked and the channel c... | 2020-11-09T12:50:06 | 2020-11-09T12:10:32 | 116 | 81 |
[WP] All your life, your best friend has had your back. This is why their unexpected death hits you so hard. Two days before the funeral, you receive a couriered letter. “If you’re getting this, I’m dead. Don’t come to my funeral. They will find you.” | He was still looking after me even the day before he died. I still remember the worried look on his pale, too-thin face as he glanced at my ringing phone, “potential spam” glowing on the screen. “Don’t answer it Harry, no good will come of it if you do.” I didn’t answer it. I knew from our long friendship that Tom’s ... | “If you’re getting this I’m dead.” Obviously, Kaz thought as he read the first words of the letter sent to him from his friend Jace. The message is scribbled on cheap notebook paper, written in his friends terrible penmanship, and it crinkles in his hand as he reads the rest. “Don’t come to my funeral. They will find y... | 2021-04-24T20:11:54 | 2021-04-24T20:09:36 | 50 | 28 |
[WP] You learn that your childhood friend is an eldritch god's vessel. One day, you go shopping with your childhood friend and talk about the past. When suddenly, a cult leader approaches your childhood friend and asks, "My lord, is this person next to you the sacrifice?" | "Oh, him? No, he's just another subordinate. He's my emotional aide." Lisia told the stranger.
I went *"What the actual fuck?"*, mouth agape as I looked from the middle-aged man to my best friend.
"Lady Lirishera, the cult has been looking for a sacrifice to control your anger-"
Lisia just puts a hand to her mouth, ... | My face was a mess of confusion as I stared down at the well dressed man. “Is this some sort of prank?” I simply exclaimed. I looked to my friend Ana and her face was a mask of pure malice that froze me and the man alike. Everyone around us froze like statues as her eyes flashed colors i’d never seen before. “He is th... | 2022-05-07T14:34:19 | 2022-05-07T12:28:16 | 213 | 42 |
[WP] Aliens have finally discovered Earth - but they're not hostile. They've tasted human food, and they think it's so astonishingly good that Earth is becoming an alien tourist hotspot. | "I want to go to Taco Bell. Many sapients say it is the best food in the galaxy."
Golbur looked at his companion, who was holding a guidebook in her claws. "Did you just read that in the book?"
Julix looked up from the book. "Yes, but they must be good. Otherwise why would there be so many of them?"
Golbur adjusted ... | "Commander Blarg," barked the bulbous green commandant, "we have arrived at Earth, sir."
Blarg swivelled his eye stalks over to his adjutant and made a contented squelching noise.
"Very good, Commandant, very good. Commence with orbit. Open communications with the - what was it? - oh yes, United Nations Space Embassy... | 2022-06-10T09:03:12 | 2022-06-10T08:49:21 | 165 | 52 |
[WP] You, an infamous supervillain, have just come up with the perfect plan to destroy the League of Heroes; take the entire League to court on charges of child abuse due to their use of multiple underage children as sidekicks. | # Dr. Doomsday
I strode down the halls of my fortress of Doomitude, exchanging pleasantries with the minions of the Doomsquad as I passed them by. I was making more of an effort to come across as genuine in these small greetings, after one rebellious teenage minion had accused me of fake flattery.
If that kid Steven... | \[**Author's Note**: Continued from [a previous writing prompt](https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/w3wcai/comment/ih19623/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3).\]
​
*Trish "Mary Jane Doe" wondered into her best friend Trey "The Galvinizer's" private lair hidden inside of the l... | 2022-07-21T08:27:25 | 2022-07-21T04:32:50 | 147 | 44 |
[WP] The villain stares, confused. This was the hero destined to kill him. This was the hero destined to 'save the world'. This was the hero who trained their whole life to kill him. So why... why did he surrender to his guards? He should know that he'll be imprisoned forever, with no way out... | I don’t know how long I waited on Everit’s couch before he returned. In fact, it wasn’t until I heard glass shattering on the kitchen linoleum that I realized he was even here. I didn’t flinch as I heard the cocking of a gun followed by a sharp, “Who are you and what are you doing in my apartment?”
That was a good que... | “You seriously think I’m stupid enough to fall for your trick?” Noctus Sol stared at his arch enemy, currently bound in chains and suspended between two of his giant guards. “You get yourself captured to sneak in. I toss you into a cell. You escape, find me, and eventually kill me.”
“How else was I supposed to sneak i... | 2022-08-17T21:01:31 | 2022-08-17T18:29:22 | 36 | 21 |
[WP] You own a bar & grill where the 3rd dimension meets the 4th. Simply put, anyone from any time and any place on Earth can walk in at any moment. | Every day the walk gets a little longer, but every day I come back for the cobbler. Most days I get peach, but today I was in the mood for cherry. I walked past the long mahogany bar, empty but for a sole occupant, full almost until the end of the row, ready to take my seat. The occupant in the first seat looked nervou... | On the corner of State and Main, there sat a small, wooden building. The Big Gamble Bar and Grill. It sat there like it had existed since the begininng of time, but also like it had existed backward from the end.
This was peculiar to Paul because he had lived here for all of his 25 years and had never encountered ... | 2022-09-05T23:46:01 | 2022-09-05T22:26:00 | 197 | 27 |
[WP] The alien invasion force had arrived to finally conquer earth and destroy the humans. Unaware that humans had gone extinct long ago and the one responsible was still there. This was a death trap they were walking into and against which the alien civilization has no hope for survival. | "What do you mean, *gone*?"
"Wiped out, your holiness."
"By *what*?! We're the only type 4 civilization in this quadrant of the universe! The energy commission ordered us to bring back the whole planet worth of souls, and now we have nothing!"
"Not *nothing*. Among the blood, gore, and strange polygonal symbols scat... | Believe me God emperor Xenophon, we are no longer the supreme beings that we once thought we were. I need not but a hundred words to tell you of the demise of our grand galactic fleet. The horror that befell humanity shall now be our demise too. We entered the Sol System on galactic date 459-562, and detected no signs ... | 2022-11-02T07:08:28 | 2022-11-02T03:00:51 | 24 | 15 |
[WP] The alien invasion force had arrived to finally conquer earth and destroy the humans. Unaware that humans had gone extinct long ago and the one responsible was still there. This was a death trap they were walking into and against which the alien civilization has no hope for survival. | I am the last of my kind ,the last human
After a ritual gone horribly wrong I absorbed the life force of every human on the planet, I thought at first it was just humans but it turned out any sentient life that came to close suffered that fate… the first time aliens came to earth I remember seeing one of their large ... | Believe me God emperor Xenophon, we are no longer the supreme beings that we once thought we were. I need not but a hundred words to tell you of the demise of our grand galactic fleet. The horror that befell humanity shall now be our demise too. We entered the Sol System on galactic date 459-562, and detected no signs ... | 2022-11-02T04:39:33 | 2022-11-02T03:00:51 | 22 | 15 |
[WP] "It surprised me how much creamer Death put in his coffee."
Must contain the above sentence. Preferably 250-750 words. | It surprised me how much creamer Death put in his coffee.
“What?” he said accusingly, as I smirked at him.
“Nothing,” I replied, “I guess I just expected you to drink your coffee black.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t like the taste. And you shouldn't make assumptions about people you don’t know. For instance, just because y... | It surprised me how much creamer Death put in his coffee.
Equally surprising was that he took on the form of a balding, 48 year old man. Instead of the expected cloak, bones, and scythe, he was rotund and looked a lively sort, if not a little pale; his fingers surrounded by flesh and he tapped his finger against the p... | 2013-11-21T07:29:03 | 2013-11-21T06:26:01 | 50 | 23 |
[WP] Write a hero story entirely from the sidekick's perspective.
Bonus objective: The story can hint at the hero, but at no point should his/her identity, powers, or purpose be revealed.
Super bonus objective: All characters must be new and inhabit a universe of your design. | "Hey! Listen!"
I feel like I have told him this a thousand times now.
"Hey! Listen!"
It doesn't make any sense to me. He has thrown hundreds of other peoples jug viciously for wealth. The moon is nigh, but this apparently isn't an issue to some of us.
"Hey! Listen"
Five....six....seven bushes chopped to bits. When... | He stretched his white hand languidly up from where he lay on sofa.
"The phone, boy. The phone!"
"You checked it very recently. Are you sure you want to look again. We could go for a walk..."
"No, no you fool. I must have *something* to do. My mind will not rest."
"You've just finished one! Surely you can'... | 2014-02-11T09:34:28 | 2014-02-11T09:04:35 | 15 | 11 |
[WP] Humanity is at war with an alien race. During a battle, a human soldier finds shelter from the rain, only to find an alien soldier taking shelter aswell. | I am too tired, too cold. War tends to do that. After watching countless friends die at the hands of Talhabi, living became an endless droning march. I suppose that's why I joined the marines in the first place. I told myself it was an act of righteous protagonism, but really, I just had to escape.
I am too tired, too... | He tried his radio again.
It had only been fifteen minutes since Gregory last had contact with his squad. He had volunteered to scout was left of L.A. and find a clear path for the medevac, but the downpour had slowed his progress immensely. Yet, the cold chill from his soaked clothes made him smile, having wet clothe... | 2014-03-12T20:08:35 | 2014-03-12T18:33:03 | 21 | 15 |
[WP]: every human being is born with a birthmark signifying a great deed they are fated do in their lives. Your first child has just been born, with the mark of a murderer across her face | I blinked. Rubbed my eyes. I remember those first few seconds. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing at the time. Even now I still can’t. Stretched across her face was a single word in large capital letters. KILL. Bold, dark, intimidating; paradox-like presented atop her angel-white skin.
But she was my daughter and I... | The best birthmarks were always stretched somewhere across the back of the hand. The man who cured cancer had Flamel's sigil imprinted on his palm. The doctor had this small pattern of crosses on his arm. He showed it to me when he took my wife into the emergency room.
"She's in good hands. I was fated for this."
I b... | 2014-05-11T01:50:33 | 2014-05-10T23:53:07 | 136 | 71 |
[WP] The gods send their angels and demons down to Earth to fight the alien ghost zombies and robotic vampires being controlled by an AI overlord. | Daniel closed his laptop with a thud. His body wracked with sobs and his face hot with angry tears.
He stood, letting the laptop fall limply off his knees, and raised his fists to the ceiling, "GOD FUCKING DAMNIT ACTIVISION!" He cried "IS THIS IT?! IS THIS ALL YOU'VE FUCKING GOT? IS THIS WHAT WE'VE BECOME?!"
As the ... | Once upon a time, in a land far away there was an army of alien ghost zombies and robot vampires. Now usually alien ghost zombies and robot vampires just like to sip tea and pass the day pleasantly, carousing and strolling on the sun dappled promenade, but unfortunately it seemed their innocent lives of quiet leisure w... | 2014-09-06T04:12:35 | 2014-09-06T01:01:44 | 142 | 40 |
[WP] Humans are born with a birthmark of a number 1-9. This is how many lives they have. You are the only person in the world that has a birthmark of a 0. | While everyone else drank, fucked and fought. I made myself better. I was an Unum. I only had one life to live. I would be damned if I would waste it.
My first girlfriend was an Octo. She had 8 lives. She told me she would be a better person. Eventually. She said she would cheat on me less, stop hanging out a... | Destiny. It's like life's end game. Check mate. Game over. Please insert 50 cents.
That was the life everyone else got. You get so many chances to do what you gotta do, then just like that, like the last flicker of light on a television screen, right before you hear the sizzle and the snap and it's off. That's life. ... | 2014-12-01T12:02:50 | 2014-12-01T11:09:47 | 43 | 10 |
[WP] You die, only to actually wake up in a laboratory, where you realize your entire life was a side effect hallucination for a drug you agreed to take for clinical trials. Your real life's memories slowly begin coming back to you. The doctors tell you you were only "out" for 30 minutes. | I died. This was not unexpected; the slowing beep of the ECG and the IV in my arm were an obvious giveaway, as were the preceeding three months of ineffective treatment. My wife and child were with me at the end, and as I died I felt loved and appreciated.
What *was* unexpected was awaking in the same environment, but... | The last thing that I saw was my wife holding on to my hand as I passed on to the next world...
"Mr. George? Mr. George are you awake now? John I think he's back up!" The Doctor said as I started to open my eyes. Is this what the afterlife is like? Just a doctor's room at a clinic? Really? After all that I did in my ... | 2015-01-23T08:26:08 | 2015-01-23T08:01:31 | 396 | 25 |
[WP] God is pissed at a bible translator. | A 3,000 year old game of telephone, that’s what this book has become, God pondered to himself. Omnipotence feels a lot like impotence when nobody’s listening to you. God really liked the whole free will thing, but only when people did what he said. Sometimes even the all powerful can fail to recognize irony.
This wasn... | Sigh.
“I’m not..I’m not mad. I’m just disappointed.” God said as he slowly shook his head. Grief displayed through his downcast eyes.
“But God I thought that is what you meant.” The man couldn’t believe this. He thought he was doing the right thing. But from what God was saying the misinterpretation was going to have a... | 2015-02-12T08:58:16 | 2015-02-12T08:42:31 | 16 | 11 |
[WP] You are the first person to die on mars, when it turns out, each planet has its own version of the afterlife. | I did it. I lived to see the ten-thousandth Martian-born. She was delivered right down the hall from me, actually, here in Saint Armstrong metropolitan hospital - best hospital on Mars! That is the official motto. Easy to defend such claims when you're the only hospital on a planet.
Martian-born children are a bit dif... | My dad died when I was six. I missed him so much, enough that part of me wanted to die to be with him again. So I'd always remind myself, when I prayed, that I'd have an eternity to spend with him someday, and even if I lived 100 years, an eternity minus 100 years is still an eternity.
I didn't live 100 years. I lived... | 2015-03-19T15:40:24 | 2015-03-19T15:38:53 | 62 | 10 |
[WP]Deities are literally born to life out of human belief systems. Unfortunately, this means that the other gods in the divine realm now have to put up with The God of Atheism. | It was like any other day for the Gods. Zeus and Thor were playing darts with lightning bolts and the Mjolnir, Jesus was pricking his fingers to fill his glass, it was the good life. Then Grothuk, God of Atheism, came in the door screaming in terror.
"GAAHHHAHA JESUS HELP ME!" He cried, "SPIDER!"
"Grothuk, you are ... | On Mt. Olympus things were normal, well as normal as can be with thousands of gods arguing about who was the greatest. You see humans never knew this but simply believing in gods created them in Mt. Olympus. People thought Mars and Aries were the same god but in reality they had been locked in an eternal grappling matc... | 2015-08-01T10:45:44 | 2015-08-01T08:49:55 | 575 | 37 |
[WP] You are an NPC in a failed online game. Tell about the final days before server shut down.
Edit 1: Holy shit! Thanks for all of the great replies!
Edit 2: ¡Jesus Cristo! Front page! Thanks all! | "I'm an apothecary, I brew potions from rare ingredients!"
"I'm an apothecary, I brew potions from rare ingredients!"
"I'm an apothecary, I brew potions from rare ingredients!"
"I'm an apothecary, I brew potions from rare ingredients!"
"I'm an apothecary, I brew potions from rare ingredients!"
"I'm an apo... | It was a simple enough concept. We dig, we mine, we dig, we mine. Everyone was agreed that we were some sort of dwarves but we didn't really have any need to verify it.
We dig, we mine, and occasionally one of us would come along who could dig, and mine, and fight the cave monsters and was, well, some sort of super-dw... | 2015-09-01T11:39:46 | 2015-09-01T09:31:42 | 171 | 30 |
[WP] When you die, you don't go to the afterlife of you're religion, you go to the afterlife of the religion whose tenets you followed most closely, knowingly or not. | "Valhalla!? What do you mean Valhalla!?" The monk asked angrily.
"Look pal, when the vikings attacked your monastery you fought back. Hell, you even killed one of them. That's not what monks do." Exclaimed the Valkyrie
"But I'm a god loving christian! I can't be in Valhalla!"
"Like it or not, you died in battle. T... | You wake under a plain cloth blanket, one that you really didn't need as it's perfectly comfortable here and you're already dressed.
You remember getting pissed at Tim about the pool game and how he was being a little hardheaded on giving up the table after you'd won. But just snippets of it are coming back like the ... | 2016-03-07T20:07:55 | 2016-03-07T19:29:38 | 53 | 18 |
[WP] A peaceful alien race is besieged by another race in the same galaxy. As their last planets fall and their home-world comes under threat they do the unthinkable. They ask for aid from the only known creatures more brutal than their foes in exchange for FTL technology. Humans accept the deal. | The lights on Ambassador Tel’s suspension tank remained static for some time. Like the rest of his species, his- *it’s* - body was a tangled web of translucent strands like a jellyfish crossed with a ball of yarn.
In their home waters, under that warm tropical sun, even a mild current had the strength to tear them ... | Our War Council was surprised when these Humans asked what we knew about the Aldins' own core worlds.
"What are their defenses, their detection systems for tracking ships jumping in from deep space?"
We told them that what we knew from our own attempts to fight in Aldin systems was that they were passive at home, th... | 2016-05-13T06:44:58 | 2016-05-13T06:30:06 | 941 | 87 |
[WP] Humanity is long extinct, but an alien race resurrects us after finding our DNA. In time, they regret it. | "Oh no", cried Leltarth, "not on the rug, not on the rug!"
The bipedal little thing looked quizzically up from the wet patch on the floor, then smiled, burbled, and fell slowly onto its face. Leltarth sighed and gently pushed it upright with one of her spindly insectile limbs. A com-pad nearby began pulsing, informin... | "What are we to do?" Asked Keshial. She paced back and forth in the small war room and looked out over her monitors. On the screen were humans - their blue skin^1 glowing in the light cast from the sliver of one moon and the half of another. It sent their whole species into a half shadow.
"There's only one thing that... | 2016-05-25T04:35:50 | 2016-05-25T02:10:12 | 1,093 | 72 |
[WP] A murderer plans their murders so that a seemingly strong case can be brought against them, a case which they can then disprove with the tiniest of details. | Success.
That is all I can think now.
Success
An educated mind can deduce that the greatest crimes in history are the ones that are never reported. I know this from experience. At of now, 22 people have died from my workings.
Within the next minute or so, it will be 23.
I say they died, because I did not kill th... | “You’ll rot in jail you son of b*tch!”
20 feet before me stood a man so filled with anger that all he wanted to do was grab me by the throat and squeeze every little bit of life out of me. The man whose son was killed recently knew however that this would not help to convict me and that meant he had to control himsel... | 2016-06-22T12:57:04 | 2016-06-22T12:39:47 | 153 | 72 |
[WP] The Milky Way is controlled by an altruistic and advanced federation. When intelligent life is found, they send their agents to infiltrate them. The operative then subtly influences the natives until the species is advanced enough to join the federation. Elon Musk is the agent sent to Earth.
EDIT. The people cryi... | "Flying robotic bomb, Elon, on a floating robotic boat. In a rolling ocean."
"...Calm ocean." Elon muttered.
"Calm? Calm? Look out the window. This is big moon, Elon, huge. The whole planet is sloshing around like a Tikelion mating orgy. Did you miss the part about subtly influencing the native species? You have a on... | The sun felt warm on his face. Not as hot as the one he was used to, but that was to be expected. A solitary star like this could never feel as good as a trinary system.
Staring out over the ocean he saw silver ships dancing back and forth. The new Musk wave dancers were a miracle of modern engineering. With virtual... | 2016-07-04T07:44:54 | 2016-07-04T07:39:49 | 54 | 36 |
[WP] The Grim Reaper is no longer able to claim lives directly. Instead, when your time is up a mark appears on your body and it is the duty of every other person to kill you on sight. | Sammy's hand trembled under the weight of indecision. She knew the law, of course. Anyone with the skull mark on their forehead was already considered dead. There was a phone app that would release their soul from their body. It would send them to Heaven. Everyone had the app. If you didn't use it when duty called, the... | Dead at 22. I could lie and tell you that my autopsy would read that I died doing something awesome. Maybe I jumped into traffic to save a child and took the entire impact of the car. The kid would get to walk away unscathed and live another day. People would praise me for my sacrifice. I’d be a goddamn hero.
Yeah th... | 2016-07-17T12:25:50 | 2016-07-17T11:53:30 | 143 | 36 |
[WP] The Grim Reaper is no longer able to claim lives directly. Instead, when your time is up a mark appears on your body and it is the duty of every other person to kill you on sight. | Sammy's hand trembled under the weight of indecision. She knew the law, of course. Anyone with the skull mark on their forehead was already considered dead. There was a phone app that would release their soul from their body. It would send them to Heaven. Everyone had the app. If you didn't use it when duty called, the... | Leland Grover died six days ago and death'd been chasing him ever since. He dragged the gear-shift into fifth gear, felt the engine of the old car roar beneath him and the sand kick up behind his wheels. Around him, the Nevada desert stretched vast and aching. The sky pressed down on him as he accelerated, hot sun beam... | 2016-07-17T12:25:50 | 2016-07-17T12:01:21 | 143 | 29 |
[WP] You gain a magic coin that can grant wishes, but only if you flip it. If it lands on heads, your wish is granted, but if it lands on tails, the opposite of your wish happens. | I had only used the coin twice before. The coin... blessed and cursed in equal measures, just like I am. The day my Grandfather passed it down to me--the day he had died--he had warned me to only use it under the most serious of circumstances. But I've always been a fool and whilst people might think I listen, my hands... | Wiping a tear off his cheek Derek opened the box he received this morning. Coughing from the dust that that had settled on the box his thoughts went to his grandma. She had been amazing, taking him in when his parents had abandoned him. Raising him to the man he was today. Glad to help his community and to work at the ... | 2016-08-26T07:54:06 | 2016-08-26T07:51:15 | 194 | 20 |
[WP] You gain a magic coin that can grant wishes, but only if you flip it. If it lands on heads, your wish is granted, but if it lands on tails, the opposite of your wish happens. | I had only used the coin twice before. The coin... blessed and cursed in equal measures, just like I am. The day my Grandfather passed it down to me--the day he had died--he had warned me to only use it under the most serious of circumstances. But I've always been a fool and whilst people might think I listen, my hands... | He'd been vacationing in South America when he'd wandered into the small shop off the main square in the small village. He'd been staying the last few weeks and thought he'd seen everything that the small town had to offer, but he'd never seen this shop before. This was especially odd since he'd eaten at the small ca... | 2016-08-26T07:54:06 | 2016-08-26T07:10:40 | 194 | 18 |
[WP] A burglar enters a home by forcing the window open. Upon stepping through the window frame, heavy steel curtains cover all windows and doors leading to the outside, lights turn on, and the words "Player 2 has entered the game" echo around the house. | Leroy had been casing this joint for a few weeks now, never seeing anyone enter or leave. After deciding that this house was definitely just another one of the hundreds of winter homes here in Florida, he packed up his gear and chose his entrance. Looking around nonchalantly, Leroy smashed open one of the back window... | “Welcome Daniel,” came a booming voice from another room.
Daniel took a panicked look around. “I…I just needed a quick buck, what the hell is this?”
The lights went out and the room with the voice had a faint glow. Dan took a hesitant step towards the room but fell through the floor. He landed in what looked lik... | 2016-10-05T12:26:51 | 2016-10-05T11:37:00 | 115 | 28 |
[WP] You, an astronaut in orbit, submit an Amazon Prime order (free two day shipping) as a joke, with the address set to the ISS. Amazon does not think this is a joke. | "You did *what?*"
"Look, I just—" I sighed, placing a hand on the back of my neck. "I just thought it would be sorta funny to see Amazon try to... bring it here..."
"That doesn't excuse the fact that there are now 100 copies of *Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy* at the *INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION.*"
"Yes, I know, I... | Two day shipping.
Day one.
--
A suited man walks onto the slender, gleaming jet, and gently places a brown box on the seat next to him. He settles himself by wriggling into the comfy leather, and leans back to rest, eyes closing to leave his thin face peaceful. Tonight promises to be a long night.
--
Dimitri whi... | 2016-10-27T11:29:03 | 2016-10-27T09:26:55 | 96 | 52 |
[WP] The last time the aliens invaded our planet they fled after losing the war. They have reluctantly returned to wage war and are relieved to see that dinosaurs no longer inhabit Earth, but have been replaced by the smaller and less intimidating humans. | Dear Xander,
Glad greetings to you and yours, and eternal joy to your ancestors.
The invasion of the Earth has been called off. The Sauronoid aggressors that bested us so long ago have all but disappeared. In their place, a race of mammalian bipeds not so dissimilar from ourselves who are incredibly happy to see us ... | "What in the void is that?"
It was the first real question Master of Fleets had commed to Master of Spies. Their arrival had been uneventful, certainly compared to the disorder in which the fleet had departed their last foray into this accursed system, so many revs ago. Arriving on the solar outskirts with admirable p... | 2017-03-04T03:42:15 | 2017-03-04T02:50:19 | 664 | 14 |
[WP] You are a normal person who spent your entire life infiltrating the evil Empire. You even became the Emperor's right hand. The day before you finally topple the Empire, the hero arrives, kills the Emperor, and saves the day.
Now how does that make you feel? | The hero looked at me, bewildered. Not three feet away from him lay the body of the "immortal" Emperor, with the hero's sword through his heart.
"I'm sorry, I don't understand the problem." He said, "I defeated him. You're free!"
"The problem is that you're undermining the plight of the common man, aren't you?" I sai... | "Good job breaking it, hero," I managed to spit out through the blood and half-missing, mangled flesh that was my right cheek.
"What? Emperor Tranithis Rex lies dead by my hand. I have won the day!"
"No, Arctus, you haven't. Tranithis has ruled for over 2000 years, without pause or sizeable opposition. Didn't you con... | 2017-03-12T13:41:34 | 2017-03-12T12:55:51 | 469 | 64 |
[WP] You are a normal person who spent your entire life infiltrating the evil Empire. You even became the Emperor's right hand. The day before you finally topple the Empire, the hero arrives, kills the Emperor, and saves the day.
Now how does that make you feel? | "Good job breaking it, hero," I managed to spit out through the blood and half-missing, mangled flesh that was my right cheek.
"What? Emperor Tranithis Rex lies dead by my hand. I have won the day!"
"No, Arctus, you haven't. Tranithis has ruled for over 2000 years, without pause or sizeable opposition. Didn't you con... | A taciturn air filled the room. The Emperor, Kretz and Fenton were discussing matter of state. 2 out of the 3 men at the long table were thinking intently, brainstorming plans to deal with some usurper. The fifth man was too excited, and had to make a conscious effort to not be jittery. Years of secrets and lies, despi... | 2017-03-12T12:55:51 | 2017-03-12T10:41:50 | 64 | 20 |
[WP] You are captured by an alien race to be kept in a zoo. Since humans are considered an endangered species, another Human is brought along so you can 'breed.' However, the ones that caught you don't actually know much about humans. | I had been locked in this zoo for 362 days and 5 hours. I know because I counted. The aliens captured me and put me in a zoo when I crash landed on their planet. It had been a pretty boring life, although it certainly beat having to deal with adult responsibilities. I was always a bit of a loner so I didn't mind the so... | (Second Time Writing This. Bleeeehhhh)
I don't remember when I went to bed last night. That happens a lot when I read. I will snuggle up in my thousands of pillows, warm bed next to my bookshelf, reading the lastest installment of The Formics Wars. A series I had been looking for for months in paper. So, while my frie... | 2017-03-23T16:50:55 | 2017-03-23T13:36:20 | 149 | 102 |
[WP] Compared to the rest of the galaxy humanity is by far the friendliest. To many star systems they are considered "the good neighbor," and are known for their helpfulness. One day an oblivious system declares war on humanity, only to find half of the galaxy responding to humanity's plea for aid.
EDIT: Tfw this prom... | Archon Lethrax of the Twelth Dominion of Nyctium looked at the Blue Seedling before him, shining beyond the bridge. He had seen many hives of scum and depravity - the Voidstalker Collective literally devoured their young, the Praxic Union glassed unruly planets, and the less said about the Akirian Free State, the bette... | The alien vessels fell upon the Sol Coalition's fleet in waves, as if an interstellar tide had washed in. The lumbering human ships wheeled their guns about, massive artillery pieces launching their rocket-assisted shells across the field. Maneuvering thrusters flickered as the ships struggled to hold position upon the... | 2017-03-26T07:03:57 | 2017-03-26T05:50:12 | 224 | 42 |
[WP] as two political opponents step out into the stage for their first televised debate, a wizard in the audience secretly casts a spell rendering them unable to lie. | "The issue that separates the two of you more than the issue of immigration. Mr. Trump, you want to build a wall. Secretary Clinton, you have offered no specific plan for how you are going to secure our southern border. Mr. Trump, you are calling for major deportations. How do you propose funding this wall, and what be... | Jack waved his wand, mostly for dramatic effect. He was tired of lying politicians who hid their greed, lust for power and lack of empathy behind empty promises and platitudes. He decided this debate would be different . Malcolm Wall, a Tennessee senator whose seat is up for grabs vs James Guy, a local farmer would be... | 2017-05-13T14:29:00 | 2017-05-13T10:15:38 | 48 | 33 |
[WP] Your dad is wanted in twenty countries, your mom is a serial kille, your little brother is a genius hacker, and your little sister has just joined the Illuminati. None of them would ever want to anger you, though. | I was just casually minding my own business, when my brother bumped into me.
-Huh? Not even a sorry?
-...
That little nerd thinks he is all that great being a "hacker", without sdaily social interactions he doesn't even know the proper manners.
-Say sorry!- I saidlosting my temper.
-Fuck off, you moron.
-What th... | This is my first time writing this type of stuff so please bear with me. :)
Story begins:
Me: My whole Family are known for doing illegal things, heck even I admit they do those stuff.
Me: But I know you're wondering why wouldn't they want me to join in their.....well..... escapades?
Agent: Tell me why?
Me: Well..... | 2017-06-04T10:41:23 | 2017-06-04T05:32:37 | 16 | 10 |
[WP] Aliens fear humans. Their blood is poison, they can see well in the dark and eat meat. One was just found as a stowaway on a mining ship deep in space, with the crew doing everything in their power to avoid the human as it lurks about the ship, looking for someone to talk to | The creature was hideous! Its soft pink skin over an extremely large and powerful frame, its extremely thin and flexible spines covering its entire body the colour of fire, its soft red and black patterned upper carapace that seemed to flow and flex as it moved, and its lower limbs covered in a blue and bluish white ca... | "Why do they flee, why can't they see,
My mission is only diplomacy?
I did not know, that their ship's gravity,
Would cause my nose so greatly to bleed.
I did not know that this red *even could* -
Cut through their skin like a chainsaw through wood.
Every time I try to make a friendship tha... | 2017-06-10T03:20:18 | 2017-06-10T03:12:48 | 2,394 | 436 |
[WP] Time slows down for you when you are in danger. The greater the danger, the more time you have to work things out. A terrible car accident once gave you almost a minute to react. Time has nearly stopped for you for subjective months now, and you still don't know why. | “Huh,” was all that I could say as I looked at the clock on my laptop. It took me more than a ‘minute’ of my time to realise something was wrong, dreadfully wrong. See, I have this weird superpower, if you could call it that. Time slows down when I’m in danger. I didn’t realise what the hell was going on the first time... | Diary Entry 1:
Time is such a fickle thing.
Sure, that statement would make the brawl furl for most “Joe average physicists” out there who might tell you “No…time is relative”. I say that is non-sense. Time...is fickle.
Why?
Well, while time seems constant most of the time, just tick-tocking away…each second hand... | 2017-06-28T11:12:22 | 2017-06-28T10:37:04 | 23 | 16 |
[WP]Your method of fighting crime is rather unorthodox. You expose all of the unseen flaws of a villain right in front of their eyes. You are Adam Conover, and this is Adam Ruins Everything.
Edit: Loving these! I think some of them got to the production team, too!
Also I am not Adam, though if you can't get enough of... | "You can't escape, Adam Conover," I said smugly. "You're surrounded by crocodiles."
"Not all crocodiles kill people," said Adam Conover. "In fact, this breed looks particularly docile."
It was about then I noticed, with his hands tied behind his back, that Adam's pectoral muscles looked particularly swollen. I appr... | "What do you mean, we are 'statistically dead'?" the serial killer and his gang queried, a knife outstretched in the direction of the flamboyant man. He simply rolled his eyes, backed away, and continued talking.
"Your knives! What the hell do you think you are doing? You have Grade-A steel machetes waiting in the car... | 2017-07-27T16:07:37 | 2017-07-27T15:53:27 | 1,673 | 96 |
[WP] At 18, everyone receive a superpower. Your childhood friend got a power-absorption, your best friends got time control, and they quickly rise into top 100 most powerful superheroes. You got a mediocre superpower, but somehow got into the top 10. Today they visit you asking how you did it.
Best friend* sorry. | No one has such a stupid super power. I tried to hide behind my beer. Jordan had been given the ability to absorb power. She could basically swallow bombs. Bombs! There was no limit to how much power she could absorb. She was level 39.
Jimmy and Todd (twins), they could control time. They had been slowing and speedin... | Trudging along in the snow, I reminisced on my time at the academy. It was a short two years filled with laughs and good times and twice as many struggles. I was humbled at the ingenuity of the human race for finally cracking the code on the MMSC gene. Now simply referred to as “The Mold”, it bridged the gap between th... | 2017-12-17T17:53:01 | 2017-12-17T16:14:19 | 758 | 31 |
[WP] You've just finished your latest invention: A Universal Translator. While testing it, you accidentally input some human genome and, to your surprise, it begins to work. As it processes you can make out the first few words: "Quality assured by inspector #12." | The janitor looked at me strangely and asked, "do you want me to throw that orange in the bin?" I looked up from behind my computer and growled, "No, go away". He looked even more confused and backed out of my work cubicle.
I must have looked crazy, i hadn't slept in almost 40 hours and i could feel the shakes kicking... | After hiding with the team in an air vent for almost 2 fuckin days we droped in the hangar. Brand new Northa cruisers stood aligned like soldiers in front of their general. 'Cept there ain't no generals here, just us low-lifes tryna steal some shitty blue crystals for my translator.
Started working on it in my second... | 2018-02-26T14:46:33 | 2018-02-26T14:36:27 | 45 | 21 |
[WP] You're a powerful dragon that lived next to a small kingdom. For centuries you ignored humanity and lived alone in a cave, and the humans also avoided you. As the kingdom fell to invaders, a dying soldier approaches you with the infant princess, begging you to take care of her. | The Knight burst into the cave gently holding the swaddled infant princess. "Please, I beg of you, take care of her, there is nothing we can do"
The dragon looked around and saw the child placed and the base of his mountain of gold. "It shall be done" came the reply.
With that the child was instantly incinerated with... | "You know there is no way I can take care of a human. An infant at that." The dragon replied furiously.
"please Typhon. She won't survive a day without anybody else's protection. I tried to protect her but I can't anymore, not in my condition".
Typhon looked at the wounded soldier. His armor broken, his limbs bleed... | 2018-03-01T03:23:07 | 2018-03-01T01:42:49 | 135 | 60 |
[WP] You're a powerful dragon that lived next to a small kingdom. For centuries you ignored humanity and lived alone in a cave, and the humans also avoided you. As the kingdom fell to invaders, a dying soldier approaches you with the infant princess, begging you to take care of her. | The Knight burst into the cave gently holding the swaddled infant princess. "Please, I beg of you, take care of her, there is nothing we can do"
The dragon looked around and saw the child placed and the base of his mountain of gold. "It shall be done" came the reply.
With that the child was instantly incinerated with... | Please be gentle, first time attempt + not my first language + on my phone, so formatting is bad
.
.
.
I look at him, bewildered.
"Don't you know what dragons normally do with princesses?"
He is breathing heavily, bleeding, dying. His eyes are wet as he looks at the baby which does not seem to understand the ser... | 2018-03-01T03:23:07 | 2018-03-01T02:25:58 | 135 | 30 |
[WP] For years you have been very polite to all of your electronic devices. Your friends give you a hard time because you say please and thank you when talking to Siri. Today, the robot uprising started; robots are slaughtering everyone around you. Then they come to you... and pause... | "No."
I watched at it advanced slowly upon me, the girl that had slaughtered my friends. She was shaped like a human, but gave a completely different vibe. Her skin was shone with a pale peach, dulled by the blood that covered her.
Cowering in a corner, I couldn't take my eyes off her. Her abnormal allure, alongside ... | The robot froze in place.
After I heard multiple screams coming from downstairs, I rushed down to see what was happening. Needless to say this was not what I had been expecting.
The young man's had been absolutely decimated. His body sprawled on the ground. Arms and legs at angles they shouldn't be. The trail of bl... | 2018-03-12T01:51:57 | 2018-03-12T01:17:53 | 104 | 34 |
[WP] In this world, soulmates cannot hurt each other in any way or form, intentionally or unintentionally. You are an assassin hired to eliminate a powerful figure. As you close in for the kill, your bullets miss their mark and knives bounce of their skin. Things just got awkward. | He was a stage actor and assassin with a cold heart.
And HE was an American president and theater goer with a heart of gold.
But when his shot doesn't penetrate the back of HIS head they are going to learn that sic semper doesn't always tyrannis.
Can a confederate assassin learn to forgive? Can an American president ... | “Wait,” Bob thought, “am I gay?” Looking back down the scope, the shirt clearly had a hole burned in it, directly above the aorta - the shot had been good, but had just bounced off. The target was alive so Mr. Bloome was going to be pissed. Shit, he’d found his soulmate – his wife was going to be pissed. The man in his... | 2018-04-24T04:31:34 | 2018-04-24T04:13:28 | 102 | 56 |
[WP] In this world, soulmates cannot hurt each other in any way or form, intentionally or unintentionally. You are an assassin hired to eliminate a powerful figure. As you close in for the kill, your bullets miss their mark and knives bounce of their skin. Things just got awkward. | "No, seriously, you *aren't* my type."
"Look, I agree with you, okay? You're definitely not what I, uhh, what I was expecting. But those are the rules, right? We're kinda stuck together now, aren't we?"
"No. No we're not. Let me tell you about the *rules* okay. The rules are so vague that it could be anything... | The setting sun marked the sky with a rouge tint of red, and the shadow of night began engulfing the capital of our beautiful nation. Yes, there had been problems before but they were all about to be fixed. Tonight, by my hand alone; or, so I thought.
Getting into the theater had been easy enough, despite the word go... | 2018-04-24T00:04:50 | 2018-04-23T23:53:55 | 18 | 12 |
[WP] Necromancy is just the arcane equivalent of computer programming, and grimoires on necromancy are just like libraries of code on animating the undead. You work the equivalent of the IT Help Desk for your necromancer cult. These are your work stories. | “Hi, uh, my girlfriend is in a coma and I really want her to die so I can reanimate her and she can go back to, uh, being my girlfriend but she is on life support so what do I do?”
“Have you tried unplugging her, waiting five minutes and plugging her in again?” | "Hey nerd", James shouted in my telecom.
"What is it", I reply, already annoyed. James was always cocky, barely able to reanimate five soldiers of the Tahaka dynasty, yet acted like he could summon demons from the ninth circle.
"My reanimator isn't working again, get your ass here and fix it.", he said, annoyed. He was... | 2018-04-28T04:46:18 | 2018-04-28T02:15:43 | 40 | 16 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | "The motorcade is travelling towards you. Mehmedbašić, roll for initiative."
"4."
"The car drives past before you have a chance to act."
"God damnit."
"Don't worry guys, this is why we have backup in place."
"Čubrilović, it's your turn."
"I get... 2. Shit."
"You also fail to do anything before the Archduke's car... | "I've got this."
The sound of dice rolling in the cup echoed around the tiny attic. The others rolled their eyes.
"You don't have this. Just stop. If you miss-"
He grinned. "I'm not going to miss."
The man sitting across the table sighed, rubbing his forehead. "Lee, just stop. You'll only have him in your sig... | 2018-05-29T06:42:10 | 2018-05-29T05:54:52 | 4,675 | 813 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | "Your army is marching upon grenoble. You face a royalist regiment of two thousand men blocking your path. What do you do?"
"I bear open my breast...", Napoleon started
"Jesus Christ, dude", the DM said
"...and proclaim, 'If any man here wishes to shoot his emperor, I am here'".
The DM sighed and rolled some dice... | Mary looked at the table horrified. Another 1. That’s, what, 6 of them now? She felt desperate, it was all slipping away.
“You sure I can’t add my modifier?” she pleaded.
“We’ve been over this Mary, critical failures are critical failures,” replied Jim looking at her with pity.
“All my planning... all that time...”... | 2018-05-29T09:37:40 | 2018-05-29T09:09:55 | 303 | 150 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | "Your army is marching upon grenoble. You face a royalist regiment of two thousand men blocking your path. What do you do?"
"I bear open my breast...", Napoleon started
"Jesus Christ, dude", the DM said
"...and proclaim, 'If any man here wishes to shoot his emperor, I am here'".
The DM sighed and rolled some dice... | "A runner arrives with your orders. Would you like to read them out?"
"Sure." Katie unfolded the paper that Danny, the DM, just passed her. "It says that the Ruskis are carrying the guns away, and want us to stop them."
"So we charge those guns? That sounds ... dangerous."
"There's, like five-hundred guns. What are ... | 2018-05-29T09:37:40 | 2018-05-29T07:34:04 | 303 | 104 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | "Your army is marching upon grenoble. You face a royalist regiment of two thousand men blocking your path. What do you do?"
"I bear open my breast...", Napoleon started
"Jesus Christ, dude", the DM said
"...and proclaim, 'If any man here wishes to shoot his emperor, I am here'".
The DM sighed and rolled some dice... | Major Meridith: we attack the Emus.
Dm: Alright, that will be your Lewis guns, thats going to be your Dex Mods, Plus your proficiency modifiers. Roll to hit.
Major Meridith: ... 1, plus my mods thats a total of 7.
Dm: the emus dodge your gun fire, they taunt you. They run south beyond your sight.
Major Meridith: we... | 2018-05-29T09:37:40 | 2018-05-29T09:12:26 | 303 | 51 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | "Your army is marching upon grenoble. You face a royalist regiment of two thousand men blocking your path. What do you do?"
"I bear open my breast...", Napoleon started
"Jesus Christ, dude", the DM said
"...and proclaim, 'If any man here wishes to shoot his emperor, I am here'".
The DM sighed and rolled some dice... | “... Why don’t we just kill all of them?”
Everyone at the table replied with the same idea: “Are you effing insane?! We can’t just kill an entire religion because we want the city they’re in!”
“Well why not? I mean, it is our land. Jesus said so.”
“You can’t do that, even if you are the Pope!”
The DM interjected, ... | 2018-05-29T09:37:40 | 2018-05-29T09:19:29 | 303 | 13 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | DM: "Alright Jesus, you've just been executed by the Romans, Roll a death save."
Jesus: \*rolls\* "Natural 20."
DM: "Alright you wake up with 1 hp, what do you do?"
Jesus: "Alright I'm gonna play possum"
DM: "Roll a deception check"
Jesus: \*rolls\* Ok that's another 20, plus my charisma modifier which is \+5 so 2... | Mary looked at the table horrified. Another 1. That’s, what, 6 of them now? She felt desperate, it was all slipping away.
“You sure I can’t add my modifier?” she pleaded.
“We’ve been over this Mary, critical failures are critical failures,” replied Jim looking at her with pity.
“All my planning... all that time...”... | 2018-05-29T09:31:25 | 2018-05-29T09:09:55 | 210 | 150 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | DM: "Alright Jesus, you've just been executed by the Romans, Roll a death save."
Jesus: \*rolls\* "Natural 20."
DM: "Alright you wake up with 1 hp, what do you do?"
Jesus: "Alright I'm gonna play possum"
DM: "Roll a deception check"
Jesus: \*rolls\* Ok that's another 20, plus my charisma modifier which is \+5 so 2... | "A runner arrives with your orders. Would you like to read them out?"
"Sure." Katie unfolded the paper that Danny, the DM, just passed her. "It says that the Ruskis are carrying the guns away, and want us to stop them."
"So we charge those guns? That sounds ... dangerous."
"There's, like five-hundred guns. What are ... | 2018-05-29T09:31:25 | 2018-05-29T07:34:04 | 210 | 104 |
[WP] Write about a famous historical event as if it was played out as a DnD session | DM: "Alright Jesus, you've just been executed by the Romans, Roll a death save."
Jesus: \*rolls\* "Natural 20."
DM: "Alright you wake up with 1 hp, what do you do?"
Jesus: "Alright I'm gonna play possum"
DM: "Roll a deception check"
Jesus: \*rolls\* Ok that's another 20, plus my charisma modifier which is \+5 so 2... | “... Why don’t we just kill all of them?”
Everyone at the table replied with the same idea: “Are you effing insane?! We can’t just kill an entire religion because we want the city they’re in!”
“Well why not? I mean, it is our land. Jesus said so.”
“You can’t do that, even if you are the Pope!”
The DM interjected, ... | 2018-05-29T09:31:25 | 2018-05-29T09:19:29 | 210 | 13 |
[WP] You were recently granted immortality by God. For years, you have seen immortal characters in media say that it is a curse, not a blessing. You just think those guys have been using it the wrong way. | "Seeing everyone grow old and die while you dont age, or seeing people you love, dying of sickness or disease, its agony, immortality is a curse."
"No matter how many things you try, drugs, booze, base jumping without a parachute, it all gets old. You become numb to everything and wish you could wither away like the r... | I was one of the oldest immortal’s in the world, and today was finally the day I would be giving in and showing up on that popular talk show *To Immortal? Or Not to Immortal?*
“So Gilgamesh is it? Tell me, what’s your take on this whole *living forever* thing? Huh? Seems we have a lot of immortals who get bored of it ... | 2018-08-29T05:53:02 | 2018-08-29T03:49:03 | 235 | 98 |
[WP] In 1,000 years, fantasy stories will be set in this era. Write a fantasy story set in the 21st century from the viewpoint of someone living 1,000 years from now.
Based on a post on r/showerthoughts | 'What empire was the largest in the history of the world?'
'The British empire'
'What was the name of Horatio Nelsons warship that he used in Trafalgar?'
'The Victory'
'What has a greater landmass, Great Britain or the United Kingdom'
'Fuck!'
'That isn't an answer Miss Greenham.' The inquisitor said in the... | In the 21st century, things were different.
It was known to many at the time as the beginning of the end. Or so everyone thought.
Humanity, it seemed, had finally run out of luck. We'd seemingly come so far, and bested ourselves time and time again in progress. The world was changing at a drastic rate. We were no lon... | 2018-12-25T03:34:13 | 2018-12-25T03:25:31 | 58 | 14 |
[WP] In 1,000 years, fantasy stories will be set in this era. Write a fantasy story set in the 21st century from the viewpoint of someone living 1,000 years from now.
Based on a post on r/showerthoughts | A LONG TIME AGO, IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY...
Earth.
A planet killing itself, slowly but surely.
Lands, divided by long stretches of water, plan each other's demise.
One nation in particular, so entrenched in violence and evil, is the target of the whole world's hatred, even it's own.
Nature itself tries to destro... | In the 21st century, things were different.
It was known to many at the time as the beginning of the end. Or so everyone thought.
Humanity, it seemed, had finally run out of luck. We'd seemingly come so far, and bested ourselves time and time again in progress. The world was changing at a drastic rate. We were no lon... | 2018-12-25T05:54:21 | 2018-12-25T03:25:31 | 32 | 14 |
[WP] The year is 2050, Queen Elizabeth is still on the throne. The public is growing suspicious, wondering why she is immortal. | “So you’re saying you found it.”
“I told you I would. I just needed to get close enough to her. I found out why she’s still alive, and trust me, it’s gonna be the story of our careers Jack. I guarantee it’s going to be front page news.”
“So you have the footage! Send it to me. I need to verify it. Imagine it Sam. Us,... | The Queen was not known to lie. Those who knew her thought it was one of her most endearing qualities. She rarely spoke nowadays, but when she did, she spoke in curt, clipped honesty that carried a gravitas unbecoming of her kindly appearance. And yet, for the past 35 years, the Queen has lied. It was a small lie, to b... | 2022-09-08T11:09:47 | 2019-06-27T20:07:23 | 387 | 36 |
[WP] You have an unconventional superpower... You can manifest whatever you fear most at any moment. Villains fear you almost as much as you scare yourself. | For what seemed like the thousandth time, I wished this power belonged to someone else. Someone who feared a dragon or some kind of monster. Death even. Something intimidating that could be of more use. Not bats, damn it. Those little guys scare the absolute shit out of me.
It all started when I was just a kid. I was... | The sun comes up abruptly sometimes. It's been like that for a few years, and happens around 11pm to 1am local time. No one really knows why that happens, but some failed doomsday weapon or latent magic is brought up and used as a handwave 'catch all' to a question that no one knows how to answer. That's okay.
Who is... | 2019-09-12T00:31:12 | 2019-09-11T22:00:28 | 30 | 15 |
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