prompt stringlengths 20 5.8k | chosen_story stringlengths 226 10k | rejected_story stringlengths 227 9.43k | chosen_timestamp timestamp[ns]date 2012-07-26 17:01:55 2022-12-31 14:34:19 | rejected_timestamp timestamp[ns]date 2012-07-26 14:23:36 2022-12-31 12:20:41 | chosen_upvotes int64 14 23.1k | rejected_upvotes int64 10 4.26k |
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[WP] Due to an accident you gain super powers, however instead of becoming a super hero or villain, you spend years studing the accident. Now you are the only one who knows how to create super powers. | It's not about the money.
They always make that mistake when they write about me in the papers. 'Doctor SuperMoney' they call me. The woman with a trillion dollar business making people into superheros, and its all about the money.
Which is wrong. No one knows my own power. They all assume it's the ability to... | Turns out that getting a truckload of nuclear waste wasn't the only way of gaining super powers. This of course took me many years to actually figure out.
The first few months I thought I was just down with some common cold, then... Then the incident happened. It all happened so fast my brain barely registered it, lu... | 2017-12-26T11:31:06 | 2017-12-26T11:22:03 | 478 | 38 |
[WP] "I'm not a healer. That was just pre-mortem necromancy." | A desperate voice burst out into the open, and Khavar knew what had happened. The anguished cry was enough—he didn’t need to hear the words before he started pushing his way through the crowd.
“Healers? Are there any healers around? Please?”
Khavar slipped his way through the crowd, leaving a tight funnel of space fo... | People forget that death occurs in all living things all the time. I, who studied anatomy and biology, learned this fundamental truth, and then, I learned to turn it on its head, at least a little.
My name is Short Grass, and I am a healer. I can heal most things, including death, although the latter is something that... | 2022-03-22T03:04:58 | 2022-03-22T02:47:27 | 334 | 74 |
[WP] You are part of a circle of scientists that have collaborated to fake the world into believing the sun was going supernova. As the generation ships carrying the rich, the flawed, the zealous, and the privileged leave Earth you decide its time to rebuild -the right way. | I remember the glaring lights on my face, replacing the millions of faces who could see mine. I was nervous, naturally. This might well end up being the most important interview in the history of mankind. The jury is still out on that. I didn’t really have time to be nervous, though.
Next to me, my subject seemed- not... | I lay alone, hungover, on the street corner. I have been like this for years. I’m an old man, and a hungry one at that.
I look for what I have looked for for the last 30 years: an improvement. I look for the increase in people that are kind to each other. I look for the numbers, the statistics, that tell me I made the... | 2018-11-05T10:10:29 | 2018-11-05T09:26:33 | 22 | 11 |
[WP] A few thousand people around the world suddenly get superpowers based on the character of the last game they played. Highly valued by society you are the exception as everyone laughs at your inherited powers. The thing is, you modded the hell out of your character before this all happened.
Wow I didn't think it w... | “GO GREEN!!” My neighbor screeched at the field.
I leaned to my friend Raya, “Is this entirely necessary? We could be doing something more fun. Like literally anything. Anything is more fun than this.” I looked at the field disdainfully.
“Seriously Maize? This is like the one time your power is totally on point!” My... | I sigh as I get slammed into a locker again. It's not hard. A small push and then close the door. See, before this whole shebang, I was a hefty guy, nerdy, and always on my laptop. The casual gamers and jocks only ever played games like Call of Duty or Fifa, etc. They have extremely fast reflexes and reaction times, bu... | 2020-01-30T11:35:06 | 2019-08-11T20:54:11 | 1,281 | 359 |
[WP] Two people, running away from a blind, arranged marriage, in which one is supposed to marry the other, meet on the road by coincidence and fall in love with each other. | When he walked out of the store, she was sitting in the back of his truck, crying.
"Ma'am?" Fred said tentatively. "Is something wrong?" *Well that was a dumb thing to ask.*
She shook her head, and covered her face with her hands, crying harder.
Fred looked down at the bag of chips in his hands. "Wanna have a contes... | The evening breeze danced in the air, in between a couple on a park bench, gently playing with their ruffled white hair. They each wore a blue sweater, the favourite colour, staring at the people passing before them. The man pressed his palm on the woman's.
"How long has it been, Martha, fifty years?" the man asked.
... | 2017-05-11T01:11:30 | 2017-05-10T22:20:54 | 137 | 73 |
[WP] You slowly realize that you are slow at realizing things. | “I’m concerned about you.” Her grey eyes traced my face, desperate for any semblance of a reaction.
Dismissive as ever, I brushed off her mock concern. “I do this all the time, at least he isn’t boring.” Reaching for her necklace with a devilish grin I continued, “Or Christian.”
“I know you think that God is real a... | It's sad to say that not every relationship will end in finding the one. It's also sad to say that not all relationships that end, the one wasn't found. The clinking of the ice of a gin and tonic spoke to this, or at least the conclusions I found at the bottom of the bottle said so.
There is always the thought that ... | 2017-03-26T22:04:10 | 2017-03-26T20:46:47 | 24 | 14 |
[WP] One day, while playing cops and robbers a child points his finger at a friend and makes the noise, "Pew, pew." The friend is nearly shot. Turns out, the child can effect reality by making sounds with his mouth. Gunshot noises, falling objects, cars screeching to a halt, slot machines etc... | Item #6009
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-6009 is to be kept in a 20 x 20 furnished room, with a consistent source of entertainment available at all times. If SCP-6009 is to enter a state of tantrum, anaesthetic gas is to be immediately sprayed into the room. Allowing the tantrum to proceed a... | I spent the first half of my childhood doing what any normal kid would do, playing in sandboxes and crying. At first, I didn't notice, everything was a coincidence, making alarm sounds and then a fire drill would happen, nothing too weird. Then, after saying *kaboom* I realized just how dangerous I really am. So I turn... | 2018-12-02T12:17:53 | 2018-12-02T12:10:51 | 82 | 17 |
[WP] A "popular" girl falls in love with a "nerdy" boy, however he hates her and she spends all her time trying to impress him
EDIT: THANK YOU ALL FOR TAKING YOUR TIME TO WRITE SHORT STORIES BASED OFF MY PROMPT!! I HAVE YET TO READ ALL YOUR STORIES THOUGH, AS I'M BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND OTHER STUFF :D
I'm sorry if I hav... | Dear Diary, Samantha here,
"Why wasn't he afraid?" I mused over this, wondering why HE of all people could be so nonchalant over my boyfriends threats. Chance was one of the robotics kids at our school. Really, he was just a nobody. Then there’s me, Samantha, queen bee of our high-school, cheerleader elite. I was dat... | Jonathan ran, his arms outstretched behind him, like the wings of a mighty bird of prey. He flew through the classroom leaping past desks and his classmates alike. He stopped at Billy's desk and karate chopped the papers and books onto the floor. Jonathan squealed in glee as he fled the scene at breakneck speed.
It... | 2016-05-29T11:36:18 | 2016-05-29T10:33:11 | 29 | 13 |
[WP] A catholic, an atheist, and a christian meet god. the atheist goes to heaven, but god has some words for the other two. | I opened my eyes. I felt an overwhelming urge to keep facing straight ahead, though I was curious about what was around me. In an instant, a kind-looking man walked into my field of vision. He seemed like the nicest person I could ever meet. I wanted to say hi right away.
Suddenly, he spoke, with a deep and soothing v... | Welp ... there goes my beliefs... so I met god, with my sister who was catholic and my friend who was Christian (btw that’s redundant but I don’t know enough about religion to change it so) my friend and sister had to speak to god. I was there, so I’ll recount the story:
“Hello, you all died in a car accident. I am go... | 2020-08-14T14:16:28 | 2020-08-14T06:16:33 | 15 | 11 |
[WP] The Hero and Villain are trapped, with no hope of escape, and a timer counting down till they die. They have an honest and heartfelt conversation.
Doesn't have to be superheroes. | They sat on opposite sides of the room; two forces, having spent their entire lives in unrelenting conflict, now fated to die whilst staring at one another. Aristice coughed as he felt the walls of the room begin to close in around him and Gael, clutching at his red cloak as he felt his chest uncomfortably constrict. K... | "Well you should've chosen a better means of making money.", Teddy spat.
That seems to linger in the Bloodman for a while, before it passed out of memory.
"Did you hear me? I despise *parasites* like you."
The Bloodman's eyes flashed over Teddy's green suit, placated with honourable declarations.
"If I lived my li... | 2017-04-19T11:43:35 | 2017-04-19T11:41:48 | 50 | 11 |
[WP] A drunk human is the single most unpredictable thing in the galaxy . It also makes it the perfect commander for our fleet against ai . | Volrop isolated himself in his office after making his decision. The Federation's second fleet had to do a full retreat or be completely annihilated. There just wasn't another option. They couldn't afford to lose another battle, even if it meant abandoning the people of that star system to be conquered.
Most of them ... | **"We can't keep fighting them,"** Flesh-Commander Alcasan growled. They pounded a fist on the holographic projector in front of them, the impassive blue face of the A.I. controlling their fleets staring back. "They make insane gambits. Decisions that we never even bothered creating protocols for. How can we possibly s... | 2021-08-15T11:21:05 | 2021-08-15T10:33:23 | 323 | 82 |
[WP] Everyone is born with 1-100 tally marks tattooed on their arm. The higher your number, the more valuable you are and the more successful you will be. You bully a kid because he is obviously hiding a low score. One day, he rolls up his sleeve to show an infinity symbol. | "I'm Darryl Du-montague Richmond. Of the British Du-Montague clan, yes. And I am not insane."
I spoke quietly and confidently to the man in front of me. A police detective of middling years and a 60 odd mark. He had not arrested me. To touch someone over 80 was a crime to someine like him. Let alone one of the 99th. ... | She was destined to be successful. All her friends had many many tally marks. She herself had 92, and obviously thought too highly of herself to care for any lowlives or how they faired. She knew everyone at the school, and everyone knew her. There were only a few kids more well known than her.
Billy was one of them. ... | 2018-12-27T20:06:56 | 2018-12-27T16:53:43 | 27 | 12 |
[WP] Two planets come within range of eachother every 300 years. There is always an ensuing war that lasts the 5 days that the planets are close enough. Each side can only guess at what new technology the other has built since the last time. | Early in our people's history, legend spoke of the Harbinger. Once an age it approaches, and with it death follows. The ground shakes and the seas rise to reach for the sky. Our ancestors would flee the seas only to face the molten rock erupting in the mountains. Then storms would sweep the world clean and it would aba... | [very first submission ever! be gentle!]
“Hull damage sector four, seven and fourteen! Sealing bulkheads. Releasing emergency pod controls!” The alarm lights lit up, but it was already too late for many. The heat signatures were rapidly disappearing from the monitor. Even as the alarm went of the RCM operative - Rapid... | 2015-05-26T15:11:41 | 2015-05-26T13:33:18 | 83 | 61 |
[WP] A maniac attacks and bites your dog, but it turns out it was not a person, but a Wereman. Now, your dog turns into a human whenever the moon is full. | I call Monty's name from the basement, just as I've done every month for the last half a year. I hear a sudden commotion and the tip-tapping of his claws on the floor, rushing to the basement door.
"C'mon Monty! C'mon! You can do it boy!"
Monty stares at me, gives the stairs a good sniff, then stares at me again.
"M... | One night when I was out walking my dog, some maniac attacked us. She jumped in to protect me and he bit her. She still has the scar on her side. She tells me not to worry about it.
In those words exactly:
"Don't worry about it. It's not your fault."
Yeah, see the thing is, she can talk now. The maniac that bit he... | 2021-04-01T05:16:08 | 2021-04-01T00:28:13 | 79 | 40 |
[WP] In a world where having multiple personalities is the norm, the protagonist has been diagnosed with Single Personality Disorder. | On the first day at the Many Minds Clinic they handed me a piece of paper and asked me to write down the names I would assign my new personalities. I was to give names to each individual aspect of my personality and they would eventually develop into new people as I "bloomed" from one into many. I was given a room with... | School was difficult for me, I always had a special needs teacher in the afternoon and she kept me away from the other children. Walking home after school was rough, they would always poke fun at me because I was "different".
The doctor gave me a tablet to take every morning and evening, but the next month I saw anot... | 2015-06-07T21:30:06 | 2015-06-07T20:01:20 | 37 | 26 |
[WP] All games can “Jumanji” their players, sucking them into the world of the game. You braved the battlefields of Chess, led fleets from your Battleship and breezed through Life. But nothing could have prepared you for the utter, unimaginable terror that is Monopoly. | She walks into the lobby with all the sex appeal and tragedy of a dame who just got second place in a beauty pageant. Instantly, the guests stop sipping their lowballs, ordering around the concierge, or chattering about their stuffy, boring Marvin Gardens lives. She's dressed for Vermont Avenue at best, but that doe... | I wake up on my back, with a big headache, in the middle of an old road. An old car almost runs over me. As I see it go, I see a hand come out of the driver's window and flip me off.
I stand up and notice that the traffic lights don't work. I'm dressed the way I was back at the house, where we sat down to play. I h... | 2018-06-05T21:25:31 | 2018-06-05T21:18:05 | 597 | 25 |
[WP] A man who has lived a thousand years takes up a job teaching high school world history. | "Class dismissed." I said, before my mouth ran dry. "Casey, please stay a moment."
His eyes went wide with fear, although there was no reason for him to worry. He wasn't in trouble as much as I was.
The last other student left, and I looked at Casey without saying a word. He broke the silence.
"Mr. Jones? Is this ab... | **PART ONE**
***
*High School students sit at wooden desks under fluorescent lighting on a fall day. They patiently await their new teacher, who unbeknownst to them, has been alive for just over half a millennia. A middle-aged man enters the room with a gruesomely noticeable scar that circles three quarters the circu... | 2015-04-14T16:41:11 | 2015-04-14T14:32:31 | 77 | 13 |
[WP] You’re the commander of the slave portion of the army. Your group is the fodder that softens up the enemy in preparation for the ‘real’ troops. Thing is, however, you’ve become very good at your job and can win most battles before the ‘real’ troops show up. | ***"A spear is thrust for two reasons, first for its reach and so that if its tip should shatter, the injury remains fatal and true. Such is the will and spirit of my army, unyielding in purpose and strength." - The opening words of the Dignata, supposedly written by the The Wolf of Letas, King of All, Taman the First*... | How do people end up here? Being slaves to the military? You might think that it's because they have a debt to pay to the government. Or maybe because they're criminals, forced into doing time for the crimes that they've committed. The truth is much more simple than that. We're doing it for the LULZ.
It wasn't always ... | 2021-11-20T21:55:20 | 2021-11-20T20:19:36 | 143 | 34 |
[WP] You are a superhero with shapeshifting powers. You don't fight crime. You cover for other superheroes when they need to sneak out to save the day. | As I walked into the flat, shouting "I'm back!" with my still unfamiliar voice, my eyes darted around as fast as they could, almost as fast as my mind was taking everything in.
I'm a fast learner. For this job, you have to be.
Often enough, supers realize they don't want their professional life interfering with thei... | Hello, superheros of reddit,
This is Hugh Mungus speaking to you from secret superhero live. Now, supheros, do you ever ponder, “what if I had a sex tape?” But you’re to self conscious about your body. Well that’s why I’m here, I can shape shift into your body and make a “special” sex tape. For only $999.99 you can ha... | 2020-03-23T16:29:06 | 2020-03-23T15:18:04 | 156 | 18 |
[WP] You sold your soul to the devil and you've never felt better, the only problem is he keeps showing up to beg you to take it back. | "MORTAL, PREPARE THYSELF FOR MY VISAGE"
I felt the all too familiar migraine of the demonic voice moments before Satan materialized himself, sitting opposite of me in the corner booth at Chili's.
"Hey again," I said trying to hide the irritation in my voice as Satan took a handful of chips and dipped them in s... | **Bathroom:**
Nothing stopped him from showing up inadvertent, not even my toxins hitting the toilet's silent edges on a gloom monday morning. As I was in the middle of the act, a smell like sulphur invaded my nostrils to which I smiled proudly and concerned. I achieved the most disgusting smell of my entire life or s... | 2017-07-06T07:37:41 | 2017-07-06T05:27:31 | 345 | 19 |
[WP] People's powers match their personality: impatient people get super speed, protective people get force fields and so on. Explaining why you have your power is... difficult. | “Happy birthday, Dad! You’ve turned 90!” My mother chided as Andrew; my grandfather blew out his candles with a feeble breath. It is a family dinner to celebrate my grandfather turning 90 this year, and we’ve had all three of my aunts and uncles came over to stay. Our house had never been this packed before
&#x200... | Dan watched his partners work. He sat silent, and so nobody bothered him. That was just how he liked it, really. He was able to do his part of the school project in peace.
Fortunately, he got at least one good group member. Ted looked like he he was sleeping, but he was probably being more productive than any of t... | 2019-09-08T12:16:54 | 2019-09-08T11:00:34 | 23 | 14 |
[WP] You accidentally get sent to Hell instead of Heaven, and Satan says you can just hang out while him and God get things sorted out. Meanwhile, you grow more and more accustomed to the place you're in. | Feathers, a locket and the warmth of the sun. These are all things I've known; things that play in the brief vignettes that flash as my eyes droop. I feel the temperate Autumn breeze sweep in through the open window and turn my gaze to my weeping family. My children are all here: William, Veronica, Eiliff and all the l... | Hotel chains, Casinos, Strip Clubs galore. Buildings towered over me as I stepped out of Lucifer's office. At first I was surprised but not anymore; I should have already expected, Lucifer's Office was ubiquitous, black and white
Contrary to popular belief, Hell isn't a fiery abyss, and the pools of lava represented b... | 2017-10-20T06:11:21 | 2017-10-20T06:11:08 | 2,860 | 53 |
[WP] Two Serial Killers Go on a Date, and are Unaware of Each Other's Motives | Blonde hair, hazel eyes, slim build...everything about this girl excites me. She is everything I look for in a woman. New to the city, hasn't yet made too many connections, a chance like this is a godsend.
“More wine?”
She gladly accepts. She idly stabs at her lamp chop, girl has no idea what she's doing to me. R... | As our steak arrived I realized this was all too easy. Normally I have to be convincing, charming even. If my steak simply walked into my mouth I wouldn't enjoy it as much. I savor knowing the agony the cow went through only to end up in my musculature. Amanda has hinted three times now that I need to see her art c... | 2013-12-30T18:59:46 | 2013-12-30T18:36:23 | 39 | 12 |
[WP] When you kill someone, their remaining life span is added to yours. Archaeologists have just found a cavern, apparently sealed off for thousands of years, with a single person living inside. | Weeks. Years. Days? Months? Centuries?
Long. Trapped here, cold and dark and stifling. He lifts a trembling hand. Yes. Jagged rock. A cave. He remembers.
He remembers his brothers and sisters, those high and shining beings. He thinks- he thinks he shone once, too, as brightly as they. Days of glory, those were. Any... | It was a simple trick really, a bit of myth, a touch of meteorology, some carpentry.
It turns out it doesn't matter how you kill.
I turned away thousands, perhaps millions. Some asked for help and advice and I refused. I pretended they were too wicked to live, but it turns out it is I that is wicked.
The flood came.... | 2017-11-16T20:06:48 | 2017-11-16T19:57:49 | 66 | 32 |
[WP] Everyone in the world is blind. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have sight. As you try to go about your day pretending to be normal, you find that someone you've known for a long time is staring back at you.
To clarify, sight hasn't been around for an extremely long time, and society has adapted... | I didn’t realize right away.
I wandered down the hall, fingers tracing over the texture of the wall, not to guide me, for I’d not needed that in my own home for many years, but simply to remind myself that the world existed. I stood in my kitchen before my kettle, listening to the water bubble and feeling the ste... | "How long?"
"When did it happen?"
"What do you think you see?"
I recognized the voice. It was the Governor Douglas . But, I had never heard anger in his tone.
For my whole life I had heard him on the radio. Talking about how in the future things would be better. About how one day, we'd all come to see the sunrise... | 2013-11-01T00:39:06 | 2013-10-31T20:20:43 | 24 | 16 |
[WP] You are reincarnated as a dog in a shelter, however you remember your past life as a human. Then one day your past self shows up and adopts you and you realize you became your own dog and all of a sudden the way your dog behaved throughout your human finally life makes sense.
Never posted a prompt before. Feel fr... | There was *one* memory that I always thought as the most important memory. But as I got older, even those precious memories will slowly fade. Perhaps it was the old age? It most definitely was the time. Or maybe it's that those special memories are often painful, and thus it's only natural for our brains to reject tho... | What is going on? And, eww, what is that smell?
I stand up, or try to; I don't make it far off the ground. I look at my feet and... What the hell? What is going on? What are those? Are those paws? I must be dreaming! Wake up. Please wake up.
"Who's a good boy."
A woman approaches me, and for the first time, I reali... | 2019-04-07T16:48:43 | 2019-04-07T14:26:04 | 1,142 | 714 |
[WP] You are the city's premier supervillain, but you have a secret. The crimes you commit are not for gain, or to hurt people. You are always subtly testing and pushing 'your' heroes to excel, to be the best they can be. Then a villain with a reputation for murdering heroes shows up in town. | The blinding light seared black spots in my vision as I felt my body separate from top and bottom. I hear the yells of triumph, and the unmistakable cheer from the crowd. The smell of hot metal, and instant feeling of coldness overwhelms my senses. Gravity becomes stronger, and the ground comes up to greet me with an a... | My name is Eskimo Souls. I’m a “supervillain.” And I met a weird guy at the bus stop. He was wearing a jacket, but his arms weren’t on the sleeves. He just has his hood on. He even has sunglasses. “What do you do here?” I ask him, “Do you have a job?” “Can I trust you to keep a secret?” He asks me. “Sure,” I say. *What... | 2021-05-20T12:00:50 | 2021-05-20T10:45:22 | 26 | 13 |
[WP] The year is 2089. The Casita from Encanto has grown taller with each new generation of magical Madrigals. Hundreds of 5th and 6th cousins live together in this once vibrant tower, fractured into gangs and fighting for dominance. | Mirabel sighed as she approached Casita's massive front door. She paused, allowing herself the comfort of memories of happier times, when she could almost have reached both sides of the door. It was now wide enough that four wagons could pass through it abreast, and the faces on it almost too numberless to count.
Sh... |
The Casita tree has been steadily growing for some two thousand years, lovingly tended to by the Madrigals, that magical race with the deft penchant for tax evasion. Having reached a height of three hundred metres as of 2089, the tree towers over nearby farmlands and holds the height record among all flora by a consi... | 2022-05-12T05:39:57 | 2022-05-12T04:36:39 | 415 | 54 |
[WP] It started just before you realized you were pregnant. Dragons showing up around your home. Small ones first, no bigger than sparrows, with increasingly larger ones as time went on. Now you're going into labor, and a golden dragon, big as a hill, is coming over the horizon. | The first time I saw a dragon, it was in a New York City subway car. I was 22 years old and hadn't slept in something like 60 hours - I'd been pushing myself to finish a first draft of my thesis to give to my adviser. I still managed to turn it in late, shooting it off on a Saturday morning. I had then made the mistake... | The news told us not to worry…
That the dragons wouldn't bother us…
Then tell me, why is there a massive golden dragon, standing in my way, as I'm going into labor! It’s hard enough to breathe and I’m trying not to panic. Yet, the dragon stands there with its wide eyes and each of its breaths blowing past me like a g... | 2018-10-28T06:35:35 | 2018-10-28T06:31:32 | 971 | 168 |
[WP] After a hard intense labor your son is finally born. Just when you think you can breathe easy the doctor holds him up to reveal a baby with impossible spiky multi-colored hair. Gravely the doctor informs, “I’m sorry but it seems your son is the main protagonist.” | Holding my baby boy for the first time was supposed to be one of the best moments of my life, but when the doctor handed him to me, my heart sank. His hair is dark, like his father's, but impossibly long for a baby. I knew what was coming, even before the doctor opened her mouth.
"I'm sorry, but it seems your son has.... | I felt the fear sink in right away. No. First I get pregnant as a man, then this. I never thought it could happen to me. You watch the documentaries and think this couldn't happen to me, but here I was with a starry eyed glowing child, his blue hair standing straight up. It all goes racing through my head at once, why ... | 2018-08-21T08:54:27 | 2018-08-21T06:37:28 | 16 | 11 |
[WP] When a child comes of age their greatest quality manifests itself as a familiar that will follow them for life. You just turned 21 and you still didn't have one, until this morning when two showed up and they terrify you. | Everyone has a quality that best defines them.
I was told that when I came of age it would be there, just like everyone else. Manifesting itself into a object or a living thing that I would have with me the rest of my life. Only I'm 3 years past due and no quality has manifested itself, the only human in recorded exi... | "Hi Tommy" I'm your familiar said the beautiful angel.
Those were the first words I heard when I woke up and I was ecstatic with joy at finally manifesting my familiar and I felt so much warmth and comfort just being near her.
I hugged her and she hugged me back while ruffling my hair. I was so happy that I couldn'... | 2017-01-20T13:00:41 | 2017-01-20T12:43:33 | 120 | 14 |
[WP] "Good to see you, Mr. Bond," the Queen said, sliding a file across her desk. "Your next target is a certain so-called detective who has been prying too deeply into national secrets." Bond flips open the file, glancing down at the name. "Sherlock Holmes." | Bond knocked firmly on the door to the apartment, expecting to be greeted by Ms. Hudson or Mr. Watson. It was unfortunate, but collateral damage was unavoidable. So he felt the relief as he heard the thin voice answer through the door. "Ah, Mr. Bond. Come to kill me, have you? Well it won't do for you to have to liquid... | I have failed. Maybe it is for the best.
​
You see, it was shortly after World War II. There was this old guy, a private investigator, born on 6th January 1854. His name was Holmes. Sherlock Holmes. And there was this young guy, a secret agent, born on 11 November 1920. His name was Bond, James Bond.
Mr. ... | 2019-11-05T03:27:27 | 2019-11-05T01:41:25 | 253 | 24 |
[WP] A serial killer has abducted you, but says you may go free if you can convince nosleep that you truly need help. The sub is your only contact with the outside world. | 872-52-3381. That's my social security number. It's real too. Seriously, check it. I have a few thousand dollars in my bank account and few thousand more in credit. It's all yours. If you want, you can put me under a mountain of debt I will ever climb out of. But before you do that, please help me.
My name is Alan Sch... | Look, I know most of you are are in your early to mid twenties. I know that you read these sort of things to get a deep sense of wonder in an otherwise listless pit of existence. You want to sometimes believe these stories are true and hell maybe in some alternate universe they are but this one... I'll spare you the cl... | 2017-06-03T17:20:28 | 2017-06-03T17:18:06 | 2,014 | 630 |
[WP] In the year 2028 society has collapsed, and all that is left is your small town. Every week, an empty train passes through the town; anyone that boards it never returns. One day you decide to get on. | The eerie roar of the Iron Howler screeches through White Orchard as it announces its arrival. It looms before me, its metal legs chittering against its bonds as it comes to a halt.
Some say the Howler was named after the wrought iron wolf sitting atop its head, while others say the howl in question was the result of... | The steam train slowly came to a halt, the smoke billowing behind it. The townspeople stared at it in trepidation, no one moving, no one breathing.
The doors slid open, and they stood transfixed.
He approached the rickety tracks, stopping to glance back at the onlookers. Nothing was left for him here. No family, no ... | 2018-08-22T22:56:02 | 2018-08-22T22:41:33 | 218 | 48 |
[WP] You would either die or become rich and powerful, so it was said. So here you stood at the testing grounds. Before you were three doors, each to a monstrous test of cunning: Tic-Tac-Toe, the Tactician; Rock-Paper-Scissors, the Shapeshifter; or Hangman, the Executioner. | I breathed heavily. The anticipation swelled within me as I stared at the doors in front of me. This was it. The moment I was waiting for.
I had worked for years to find this sacred place. As I stepped forth, I called to the game master. They say he responds to many phrases, though I prefer this one the best.
"Eeeny,... | They said winning against any one of them can give enough riches to not have to worry about money in your lifetime and have so much power nobody will ever think about stealing them, but I wanted more. I wanted to defeat all of them. As such, I have learnt a spell that can give me an edge, no matter the challenge.
I en... | 2021-06-01T09:15:47 | 2021-06-01T06:32:26 | 40 | 15 |
[WP] the damned souls in hell crowded near the entrance, and Satan himself is at the gates. They are all awaiting the arrival of a unique soul -- the first man since Biblical times who was killed by God Himself. | Maybe this is what it looked like when Moses parted the red sea. As I'm walking through the gate the collection of the damned that were milling about the entrance began to clear my path. Those with mobility issues were trying desperately to get out of my way before i reached them. *Charlton Heston like a mother fuck... | For the first time in a long time, the work whistles blew in Hell. The demons stopped torturing, and instead went rushing over to Lucifer's side, by the entry gateway. They were unsure of why their master would mass summon them, but the older ones remember, last time this happened, God visited. This has to be important... | 2016-10-14T07:21:56 | 2016-10-14T07:00:16 | 1,142 | 15 |
[WP] All dominant species in the galaxy has something that sets them apart. From healing broken bones and severed flesh, losing 2/8 of our blood, to being infected by literally billions of parasites, Humans have the gift of simply refusing to die. It freaks the heebie-jeebies out of everyone else.
//Edit originally me... | Our advisors had pleaded against the decision to land at the SOL A-3 planet. We did not understand their fears, nor did we anticipate their fears being so inaccurate.
SOL A-3 had been discovered four universal cycles prior to our arrival. A trade ship on an illegal route had been orbit-anchored to the companion body o... | When we entered the galactic scene, we were mocked and ridiculed. We seemed below average, weak bodies, and even weaker research. Other species had figured out nanotechnology, and FTL travel, and we had just started research there.
But when the war started, we had something they didn't. We had the will to live. What ... | 2018-03-09T11:54:16 | 2018-03-09T09:46:48 | 92 | 22 |
[WP] "Every 5000 years, the Dark Lord comes to destroy the world, and only you, the Chosen One can stop him." -said the priest. "So, do I need to get a magic sword from the Lady of the Lake?" - I asked "No, just press this button please, everything else has already been taken care of" | I moved to press the button, then paused.
"So how's it work?"
The priest paused, perplexed before speaking, "How does what work?"
"The... the whole button thing?"
"Why do you wish to know? Your duty as the Chosen One is to fell the Dark Lord. Our prophecies have forseen his rising and have taken steps to deal with ... | My eyes darted to the button. Fixated on it. I took a deep breath as I slowly pushed my hand out towards the button.
All it takes in life to make the most difficult decisions is 20 seconds of faith...right?
As the button pushed in, my eyes slowly shut.
I opened my eyes to feel gears winding, cogs spinning, air blow... | 2020-11-09T11:55:57 | 2020-11-09T10:15:58 | 4,632 | 118 |
[WP] When you became a vampire you assumed that you would have to watch out for vampire hunters but the truth is something much, much worse preys upon the undead. | I was twenty two years old when I first heard it. Decades have passed but the sound of his gnashing teeth mixed with the sounds of bones snapping still haunts my nightmares. You’d think an immortal vampire wouldn’t be afraid of anything but that thing scared me. It still does.
I remember the day quite clearly. My mom... | When the undead walk the earth, the only thing we fear is death itself. We may live for hundreds if not thousands of years, looking the same, eating, sleeping, and living almost like a normal person does. Yet we never stay still, we run, we hide, we fear Death.
It doesn't sleep, it doesn't talk, it can't be seen or t... | 2021-10-28T21:00:49 | 2021-10-28T19:55:27 | 81 | 43 |
[WP] An immortal is put on a generation ship as it's caretaker and guardian. After several generations, despite their best intentions, most inhabitants now see them as something of a god. | He was the current Caretaker.
He was getting on in years, and soon he would have to pass the mantle to his young apprentice, as his own teacher did with him, as was done probably from the beginning of time, and would be done again and again, until the heart of the world stopped beating and all was plunged into darknes... | “Hey God!”
“What Up God?”
Christ walked up the rows of seats clipboard in hand. It was day 101953 on-board GS1 and Christ was on a mission.
“Okay, good morning everyone...” Christ pauses to take a sip of water. “I just spoke with Shift G and it looks like the plumbing situation on deck 42 has been fixed. So thanks! ... | 2018-12-25T17:47:06 | 2018-12-25T16:34:34 | 36 | 12 |
[WP] You are the result of a high school girl being given 3 wishes. She wished for the perfect boyfriend, so you were magically created. Now she’s trying to erase you because the boy next door loved her all along. She’s literally trying to kill you because “You never existed in the first place!”…… | "You can't do this to me!" he said. His deep, melodic voice was attractive even in its broken, choke-filled state, but Stephanie, her will hardened by the fact that Noah, the boy next door who she had hardly realized had noticed *her*, and who was *actually* real, had fallen for her, kept searching anyway.
"Steph, *p... | Her fingers tremble on the trigger. I meet her eyes, steady her with my gaze. Born from desire, and to desire I fall.
​
She whispers. I nod, listen, try to memorize my last moments with her. Such is the heart's folly, the pleasure it seeks. The embodiment of perfection, and yet.
​
The heart al... | 2021-01-07T02:59:36 | 2021-01-07T02:30:55 | 116 | 57 |
[WP]To your surprise, you and your siblings each inherit a ring from your dead, estranged grandmother. Each ring is engraved with one word: Intelligence, Luck, Strength, Charm, or Wealth. Along with it, however, came a note in your grandmother’s handwriting; “Beware the fool who wears them all.” |
I guess I knew I had a grandmother on my father's side. I mean, biology would sort of dictate that, right? But dad never talked about his family, and mom's was big enough that my sisters and I didn't want for relatives.
So it was more than a bit surprising when my dad called me up one damp day on the cusp of Decem... | We’d all heard stories about Grandma, when we were growing up. Mom never liked to talk about her, but Uncle Rob would tell us crazy tales about how Grandma Ellie had a whole room in the house full of feathers and powders and candles and alleged spellbooks, and how noises and smells and music would float out every night... | 2016-11-23T11:51:06 | 2016-11-23T10:05:58 | 58 | 38 |
[WP] Among Alien species humans are famous for prefering pacifism but being the most dangerous species when they are forced to fight.
EDIT:WOW THIS EXPLODED GUYS MY FIRST MAJOR PROMPT. | “It is currently the halfway point of the 57th millennial conference of the Galactic Federation,” the shrill voice of the insectoid Kel’Tari announcer rang out through telecasters across the galaxy, “diplomats, leaders, warriors and scientists from all the sentient races in the galaxy have made their way to Sol III, th... | "Fucking humans are at it again." Said Prok as he dipped his proboscis into the fetus slaw before him.
"I see that." Replied Ghyd, his half wife. She shifted her earlobe and toenail salad listlessly. One of the earlobes still had a diamond earring in it. "Waiter! Someone in your kitchen isn't properly dejewelrying the... | 2016-03-13T18:37:08 | 2016-03-13T16:09:35 | 63 | 21 |
[WP] The world’s best lawyer just found a magic lamp, which happened to summon the worlds most devious genie. A titanic battle of wits ensued. | As any lawyer who has ever drafted a set of interrogatories knows, the power of definitions is a magical one. While one might only have twenty five interrogatories in a given case, by defining terms or by defining what a responsive answer will include, a good attorney can stretch those twenty five simple questions to s... | The man stepped back in shock, my lamp dropping out of his hands. I smiled. My next victim. Time to make my speech.
"Master, you have summoned me, I will grant you 5 wishes, no more, no less."
The man's eyes narrowed "What's the catch, genie? " he asked.
I blinked. No mortal, elf or human, had yet asked for any c... | 2019-06-24T00:01:27 | 2019-06-23T22:01:08 | 219 | 83 |
[WP] You are trapped in a small, windowless room with nothing but a computer with a text editor. When you type in a word, the object appears in the room. However, there's a catch: the only keys on the keyboard are in the first half of the alphabet (A - M). | It’s been 21 cycles since I typed CHALK. I think I was in here for about 2 real days before I figured that one out. Now my “days” end with each time I fall asleep, but If I had to guess, I’d say I’ve been in here for about 2 real weeks. Fortunately I can at least sleep on a BED, albeit it’s really just a mattress on a ... | Can't make a saw, drill, auger, or bore, so I'm tapped on cutting tools.
Blade? I get an Xacto knife... really guys?
I could try bomb but I'd just blow myself up and det-cord's a no-go
Crap, why didn't I pay more attention in Spanish class? I'd have a whole other language to work with!
Okay, lets get a bed to chi... | 2017-05-09T09:41:38 | 2017-05-09T09:12:58 | 27 | 12 |
[WP] The eldritch god stood before the girl, in almost human form. "Your parents sold you to be my bride. I accepted, knowing that if I don't they will just try another deity, but I will not force this on you. Have this credit card and live as you wish. If you want something else instead, just ask." | “... just ask.”
The bending of air and space making sound was lost to the wind. This being, this Thing of entropy and distance, was offering her a plastic credit card.
“I ... we-“
Her voice died in her throat. How can she still have the energy to be nervous and embarrassed after being rolled out of bed in the middl... | I looked to this God sure he was an "eldritch Horror" but hey living life with pretty much nothing to do except read ones imagination led places. "I will take your offer with two exceptions." "Yesss Little mural" he said sounding intrigued "One, you tell me your name; Two you come visit me at least once a week." He loo... | 2022-08-09T19:42:30 | 2022-08-09T19:12:44 | 42 | 25 |
[WP] "The Son of Man came not to be served but to serve..." (Matt 20:28) You're up against Jesus in a dance-off | "Bring me your best fighter, and let us do battle." Jesus demanded, and the people heard. A devious idea popped in the head of Simon Cowell of American Idol.
"Jesus, we will bring you our best fighter, through competition." Simon declared to Christ. "Give us seven days, and we will give you our champion." Simon promi... | You offer us some grape juice, wafer bread,
To quench the thirsty throats of true believers.
No, let me serve you something up instead,
A tasty load of my deft dance maneuvers.
My swagger evidently cuts through famine
Unlike the fish and bread you pass out when
You need some followers for advertisin'.
I... | 2015-08-18T21:16:33 | 2015-08-18T20:15:06 | 333 | 39 |
[WP] In the afterlife each religion has its own walled city in which their god or pantheon protects the believers within from the soul-gnawing horrors outside, while atheists are left on their own
Shoutout to u/Tonkarz who had the [idea](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/7eao4f/exreligious_people_of_reddit_w... | I won Pascal's Wager.
Throughout the vast majority of my life, I had considered myself to be guided by reason, science, and empathy rather than religion. I saw no evidence for a god or gods existing, and figured any deity worth worshiping wouldn't have created a world where things like child rape and cancer existed. ... | Would I have done things differently? Yes, I would. Because an eternity in a godforsaken desert is not something you volonteer for. But the real question is: what would I have changed? Which religion should I have chosen? On Earth, they all preach some kind of heaven; here, reality is very different.
They call them 'w... | 2017-11-21T08:46:31 | 2017-11-21T07:28:08 | 26 | 17 |
[WP] You get an odd email from a rogue Microsoft employee saying he studies the live feed through people's Xbox Kinect camera and tells you a dark figure stands beside your bed every night and watches you sleep. | *FROM: MARTIN GIESTO (themartingiesto@microsoft.com)*
*TO: JACK STEVENS (handsomejack@hyperion.com)*
*CC: NONE*
*BC: NONE*
*Hello, Jack. I am Martin, Senior Security Director of Microsoft Incorporated. According to our records, you purchased a Kinect for your Xbox One on 09/04/16.*
*My job is to review footag... | I looked at my phone. A notification. An email. I unlocked my phone and opened up my GMail. The title read "URGENT: Please Read". Great, spam. I read the sender to see that it was addressed from a Microsoft email. Some TOS change or a warning about my XBox One, I guessed. I sighed and opened it.
Hello "Getoutmatepls",... | 2016-09-28T04:40:01 | 2016-09-27T23:23:12 | 35 | 16 |
[WP] It's April 30th, 2028. You wake up in your bunker and turn on the morning Reddit news. After 10 years, the worldwide hide and go seek contest officially ended today and they are announcing who won the $100,000,000 cash prize. You didn't even know the contest existed until they show your photo.
https://www.reddit.... | It’s been a long time, but I think I’m finally ready to start living again.
I’m finally ready take part in the world. It’s been a long 10 years. I’ve had nothing to drink asides from water that I got from a creek running in front of my bunker, or snow that I melted. To be honest, it’s a miracle nobody has accidentall... | "shit, shit, shit..." I stood up and started pacing, trying to reason my way out of a panic. It was possible that they'd missed someone, maybe Jonathan was still ok, maybe the doctors had been right all along and I really *was* suffering from paranoid delusions...
No. I had to face facts. I dropped into this bunker al... | 2018-04-30T13:27:18 | 2018-04-30T12:31:28 | 92 | 32 |
[WP] A fortune teller foretold that twins would be born where one was evil and the other was good. A year later, a woman gave birth to a boy with horns and bat wings, and a girl with angel wings and a halo. The boy was sent away, while she and her husband raised the girl. They kept the wrong one. | It starts with a family.
And a warning.
“Be wary” the oracle screams, swaying with the steam cascading from the vents of the cave.
“One of your children will bring evils to the nation of the likes we would never see, and one will bring it to heights we can only wish for. Use this warning wisely!”
The parents t... | Bazil landed in the village square to applause. He had slayed a dragon, driven out a hoard of child kidnapping goblins, and convinced the local lord to treat the villagers fairly.
After accepting their gratitude, he excused himself to retire to his room at the inn. He didn't want to revel, he wasn't in it for that, bu... | 2020-05-07T13:27:35 | 2020-05-07T09:46:51 | 23 | 15 |
[WP] After sarcastically complaining to God for the 1000th time he drags you to heaven and offers to let you run things for a day to see how the world really works. At the end of your first day he comes back to find the universe a finely tuned machine of excellence. | "It.. how? You..."
"I told you," Jack said to God flatly.
The white-bearded deity shifted uncomfortably on his sandals. "What did you do?" His messy room where everything was just where he wanted it was clean and tidy.
"What you were supposed to do but never did. I fixed the Earth. I fixed the whole universe, in fac... | "How'd you do it?" God asked in a quiet and amazed voice.
"Ya know all those different books with their warnings of Apocalypse?"
"Yeah. They're all ridiculous, I would never do such things to people."
"I created one apocalyptic event from every major religion of the world."
"WHY?"
"I read 'The Prince' in high scho... | 2017-03-05T03:10:18 | 2017-03-05T02:14:30 | 1,634 | 15 |
[WP] You are a child's "imaginary friend". You are a guardian angel. And your kid is really, really stupid. | “God dammit, Jeremy,” I shrieked pulling my hair. “What did I tell you?”
“Don’t talk to strangers,” an unassuming six year old with ruffled light brown hair kicked at the ground in bashfulness. His
“So a stranger comes up to you,” I growled. “What do you do?”
“Don’t talk to him.”
“What if he offers you candy?”
Je... | Perhaps it was a bad idea to assign Guardians to children at such a young age. A person does not grow to fear falling if they know they will be caught at the last moment, after all. Penelope was a precocious young girl who got herself into trouble more often than not, and Ariel was absolutely exhausted.
It shouldn't h... | 2019-10-31T14:44:54 | 2019-10-31T14:41:58 | 22 | 15 |
[WP] When you die, you appear in a cinema with a number of other people who look like you. You find out that they are your previous reincarnations, and soon you all begin watching your next life on the big screen. | "What is this?" I asked as I made my way down the aisle.
It was a normal theater, in fact it looked just like the one that I used to visit all the time with my wife, but something was... different. There were five other people in the room, all seated nearly as far apart as possible. Something prickled in the back of ... | I woke up sitting in a cinema. Next to me was a roman soldier and a barbarian woman.
"Ehm sorry to bother you, but where am I?"
"Look who finally arrived."
The roman soldier turned his head to me.
"Hi, I'm Nr. 13. But just call me Julius. You must be Nr. 51."
"What?"
"You are dead. You just died trough a accident... | 2022-05-10T21:37:24 | 2017-11-23T06:45:18 | 1,154 | 30 |
[WP] You have the most useless superpower in a world full of awesome superpowers. You are a laughinstock, that is until you start using your power for evil... no one is laughing now. | I was happy once. Before the testing of powers began i still had friends. We laughed and played as equals. I had crushes on cute girls and i think some had crushes on me. Ingorant bliss was our collective state of mind.
But that all changed when the Fire Nation attacked. It was unexpected, swift, and brutal. But the... | They didn't respect me. Never did. They laughed as I pointed, laughing that my power was useless, that no one would ever respect me.
But, over the years, I've realized something. I've realized that without this thing, Laser Beam Man won't have the strength to fight crime. Super Strength Woman won't even be able to lif... | 2015-04-12T21:13:08 | 2015-04-12T17:51:32 | 18 | 10 |
[WP] You are in heaven and you see a room that is empty except for a computer with one program running called Earth.exe. You see a tab with options of what to do to the universe and decide to have a little fun. | Heaven is, ummmm, well, it’s Heaven. Literally. There isn’t a better place possible. Everything and everybody is beautiful, classy, tasteful, elegant. Everybody is the best version of themself. People sing when they speak; they dance when they walk; every meal is a feast and every drink is as refreshing as ice water on... | Nothing but white then nothing but black. Now there's just nothing, no color or smells no feelings of any kind. No pain, my arm is back and my legs work. I cry and then I realize I'm jot sad or happy I just am.
"It takes a little getting used to" I said to myself from accros what I perceive to be a room.
"used to wha... | 2018-11-24T15:59:39 | 2018-11-24T12:47:17 | 16 | 11 |
[WP] “If you’re Death, then shouldn’t you be off collecting souls or some shit?” The woman snapped her shotgun shut before blowing another zombie clean off its feet. “Well, dipshit, I don’t know if you noticed, but I think it’s pretty obvious that I don’t have a job anymore.”
Have at it. | "So why not collect the souls of the humans that are alive, huh?"
I sighed. "Because as the Lord of Death, I have to make sure the dead stay dead. And right now, that duty entails killing zombies." I pumped another shell into the barrel. "And might I add, my job was never to take souls; it was to guide them to the aft... | Her skin was the pallid colour of a freshly-buried corpse, dug up on suspicions of some evil vampirism. Her black robes danced in the wind, threatening to get stuck in hair as raven-black as her wardrobe. If this was indeed Death, she dressed like it.
If one were in more unadventurous times, one could survey this Lady... | 2021-03-15T08:29:02 | 2021-03-15T05:53:57 | 456 | 341 |
[WP] You're happily going about your day when you vanish in a cloud of smoke. Suddenly, you're standing in a ring of candles. A sorcerer holding a tome looks pleased at your arrival. Turns out Earth is Hell, we're the demons, and you've just been summoned. | Jason dropped the carboard box onto the one he had set down prior, and stepped back. He held his lower back and arched. Fuck, this retail stocking shit is not fun. Time for a break. He walked over to the door, reached in his shirt pocket and grabbed for his smokes. Opening the door, he stepped through into brilliant su... | When I vanished from the middle of class, I didn't know where I was going. All I experienced was darkness and a rush of cool wind before I was deposited in a place that looked like the middle of a forest.
As my eyes adjusted to the level of sunlight, I saw a few humanoid creatures staring at me. They nudged one anothe... | 2017-05-12T08:33:39 | 2017-05-12T08:32:17 | 44 | 10 |
[WP] You are short, skinny and well below average intelligence. Yet, you've been hired by a group of elite soldiers to help with some of their most dangerous missions. Your superpower: sheer dumb luck. No matter how close to death you come, reality always follows the path to your ultimate survival. | Operation Code Red Tango Tango Bravo, despite its long winded name, was simple. Americans were being held hostage in the Tehran Embassy and the US government would very much like it if we got them out.
Colonel McAdams stood before the team assigned to the mission. He always avoided eye contact with me at these things.... | [Poem]
I am scrawny and small
Quite foolish too
Yet the universe loves me
Why?
I don't have a clue
I don't even work hard
But the luck is still there
Lightening struck 7 times
But I was still spared
Try as they might
I cannot be killed
For sheer dumb luck
Is always my shield | 2020-04-18T07:08:13 | 2020-04-18T00:57:10 | 450 | 190 |
[WP] A double agent who goes by two aliases has been assigned by each country to kill his alias on the opposite side. | ["I love you."](http://www.rainymood.com/)
I kissed my wife on the top of her head, right on top of that little curl that always stuck out. I remember on our wedding day, the panic she'd went into over it. It took three bridesmaids and two shots of whiskey before she accepted she looked good. I loved that curl though... | “Get it done, Peregrine, as soon as possible. Agent Psalm out.” The line cut out, and Markus Forsythe placed the burner phone down next to a nearly identical one on his desk. That was the second call this week. Two targets to kill and simultaneously two hits put out on him. He had contemplating this happening when he f... | 2014-05-11T15:26:27 | 2014-05-11T15:19:11 | 597 | 30 |
[WP] internet goes down. An emergency public broadcast on the television plays "STAY INDOORS AND DO NOT LOOK OUTSIDE." The radio simultaneously broadcasts the message "EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY, GET TO HIGH GROUND." | The message on the screen read "STAY INDOORS AND DO NOT LOOK OUTSIDE." as my radio told me. "EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY, GET TO HIGH GROUND." Lucky for me, I fell asleep watching the television the night before which gave me time to cover the windows on both sides and the front before I accidently took in the beautiful morn... | In the middle of my hard fought game of Dota2, I am suddenly presented with the disconnected from server message. Usually my internet is very reliable and never goes down. Frustrated, I rest my router and try to get it working again. As nothing else it's out of the ordinary I exit Steam and start to play since Witche... | 2017-01-27T04:05:35 | 2017-01-27T03:12:45 | 53 | 10 |
[WP] You live in a world where everyone has the way they die written on their wrist from the moment they are born. One day, your parents confess that you didn't have anything written when you were born, and they had something tattooed shortly after. | I was washing my hands after lunch when I noticed it. Out of habit, I glanced down at my wrist to look at my death mark and saw that the fading was more noticeable today than it had ever been before. Sure, several months ago it had looked slightly faded, but my mother assured me that it was just because my skin was so ... | I sat there in the family living room, rubbing the faded green ink on my skin. Its words, now blurred and stretched by age and growth, still displayed their ominous message. But I was used to it by now. Everybody was. When faced with the knowledge of your definite fate, you had to develop a steely constitution just to ... | 2016-12-16T14:03:22 | 2016-12-16T11:30:21 | 117 | 40 |
[WP] Satan, Lucifer and the Devil are fed up of people thinking that they're the same person. Since they can't interact with people directly, they hold a discussion to decide the best way to fix the problem. | Satan: Glad to see you both made it!
Lucifer: Ugh! You two are just fortunate I'm willing to tolerate your hideous faces to solve this issue.
Devil: There he goes, already! Lightbringer all high and mighty at the table. What a great way to start the conference, I don't understand why you're not more pop... | They had reached an impasse.
"Guys. I'm the funny one. Let me tell them."
Lucifer didn't bother stifling his guffaw. "You, Satan... The *funny* one?"
The Devil snorted derisively and began to smoulder. "Fuck's sake lads. We need to make a decision. Does it really matter who goes?"
They glared at each other, gnarle... | 2018-01-17T09:43:19 | 2018-01-17T06:49:20 | 40 | 29 |
[WP] You are an innkeeper in an RPG and get yelled at because sleeping there does not heal wounds. | "Delphine runs the inn. I cook. Ain't much else to tell."
The traveler stands in front of me, Bosmer, his eyes a deep orange. He'd come in late last night, asking for a room. I'd gladly obliged, he'd paid the fare of ten septims, and went straight to his room. There didn't seem to be any problems, and yet now his eyes... | 'So, let me get this straight - instead of going to a House of Healing or using a potion of health, in spite of the fact that nearly all of you are crippled with injury... you thought you could save money by *renting a room in an inn?!*'
'Why, yes I did - that's what happens in all other games, why not this one?'
'Be... | 2016-01-05T05:56:17 | 2016-01-05T05:27:45 | 696 | 75 |
[WP] Write a letter to someone you miss
It's been a rough week. Everyone has someone they wish were still with them. Write to them and tell them how you feel. Pour your heart out. No judging. Even if they never see it, someone will. And thank you. It's tough to be alone. | Dear Dad,
Or should I even call you dad? I think dad is more of a title to be earned and sadly throughout my eighteen and a half years of being on this earth, I do not think you have done very much to earn that title. Dad's don't leave. A dad is someone that is there for his children. A dad watches and actively partici... | Justin,
It's been a little over 3 years since you died. I still get hit with random emotions that make me burst into tears thinking about you. Both anger and sadness. I think about how things would be different if I had said or done things another way. If I had told dad you could come live with me, would you still be ... | 2017-11-05T22:19:09 | 2017-11-05T21:34:09 | 28 | 17 |
[WP] As an immortal and hopeless romantic, you fake your death whenever your spouse dies, then search for your spouse's reincarnated soul to continue your "past lives". Your immortal spouse is highly amused by this. | “I don’t want to go,” she said. “Oh god, I don’t want to go.”
The infection had spread quickly throughout her body, and the man was about to lose his love for the twenty-second time. It always ended this way, sickness cutting their time short together until the next time.
“Don’t worry,” the man said, holding his face... | I blinked as the carbon monoxide enveloped my face, praying desperately for my lungs to give out. When they didn't, I threw off my mask and pulled the keys from the ignition.
Looks like I wouldn't be able to join Michelle in the afterlife.
The thought that I would have to wander the world forever, alone, sent a wav... | 2020-03-09T11:25:04 | 2020-03-09T11:23:52 | 1,027 | 254 |
[WP] You are a local low rank superhero that just realised that your superpowers are not being super strong and having the ability to fly, but actually the power to reverse the laws of physics, and that, that is a game changer | The entire Demonic League, the largest and most powerful super-villain organization in the world, were gathered in City Park holding over four-hundred people hostage and threatening to raze whole city blocks unless the government added five hundred million dollars to a Swiss bank account by midnight. The New York City... | They kept mocking me. They wouldn’t stop. Everyday of high school was the same “Josh doesn’t have any powers. Look at the chubby *normal* kid!” I couldn’t take it anymore. In any other reality I could’ve ended up on the news for weeks for acting out what I was feeling. But with teachers that can control metal or read t... | 2019-02-15T15:37:43 | 2019-02-15T14:01:49 | 21 | 11 |
[WP]Well, that's a pretty fucked up way to find out you are immortal. | “If everyone can find a chair, it’s time to get started.” The woman tapped the microphone once with a humble smile, watching as the assorted crowd gathered for the anticipated event.
After a moment of silence settled in the room, she spoke again. “I’m happy to welcome so many familiar faces to our 187th annual Immo... | Holy ouch. So, uhh, you might be wondering, dear Diary, why I ache. Maybe. I don't know. Maybe I'm just concussed as all Hell and holding a narrative conversation with some people on a social media website. BUUUUUUUUT...
I was walking home from work when I passed by a construction site. I wasn't TOO worried, qui... | 2022-05-05T08:39:25 | 2022-05-05T03:52:00 | 194 | 49 |
[WP] Decades ago, Earth sent a capsule into space filled with bits about our culture. Today, it returned tampered with. It contained a note, "Your unassuming biological weapon was effective, indeed. As the last remaining member of my species, I'm returning the favor."
This is my first post on this sub and I'm not a fr... | Jaharis, in my peripheral vision, stopped breathing. The conference room was silent—execs and astronauts and physicists circled around a table, some of them the original curators of the capsule, each now mulling over the returned capsule. They were not overjoyed at its return. The capsule was dented, warped, and mostly... | I examine the contraption that lay before me. The copper plates were disfigured and warped, with some sort of green glow being emitted from within the capsule. The re-entry had destroyed, or rather, melted most other distinguishing features from the once detailed capsule. I can see most of the surrounding city from the... | 2020-04-13T13:29:33 | 2020-04-13T11:44:55 | 1,240 | 166 |
[WP] "People call me a bigot for insisting on a human pilot over an AI, but believe me, I sleep a lot better knowing something as squishy as I am is in control, and going to suffer the same consequences in case of emergency." | "It's nothing personal, AIden."
"How can it not be, Haas?"
"Because first of all, you're not a person."
"Fuck you, Haas. Want to fire up Chat Random? Watch me pass a Turing test?"
"No, I don't wa..."
"How many Gs can you stand, Haas?"
"AIden, that's not th..."
"How many Gs can you stand? Answer the question."
"... | "People call me a bigot for insisting on a human pilot over an AI, but believe me, I sleep a lot better knowing something as squishy as I am is in control, and going to suffer the same consequences in case of emergency."
- Famous quote by Karin McElroy, CEO of Thermo-Dynamics Ltd, who died in what would turn out to be... | 2017-06-08T16:19:42 | 2017-06-08T14:40:31 | 47 | 14 |
[WP] "Sorry, but you don't meet our requirements for a heavenly afterlife, here's a paper of other heavens you can try, and hells if none of those work sorted by least painful, you can always try the re-incarnation wheel, but the number of tries is numbered so be careful." | "I'm sorry," the angel said. She didn't sound sorry. Her long eyelashes fluttered and she hardly looked up from her tablet. "You don't meet our requirements for a heavenly afterlife."
Nico blinked. "What does that even mean? I get hit by a truck, I come here, and now what? I have to leave? That doesn't make any sense.... | A young woman in her early twenties was standing in front of a heavenly gate. She chewed on a piece of bubble gum while turning her computer monitor towards her 16th customer of the day. Daniel was in his thirties, but his beard was only a couple of days old.
“Stealing is usually not that much of deal in our establis... | 2020-11-27T15:51:23 | 2020-11-27T15:49:25 | 203 | 53 |
[WP] The four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are here. Their names are Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po.
Edit: Thanks guys these are awesome! Please keep them coming.
Reddit Edit: Coooool. Gold and front page, what a day to be alive!
Edit some more: Wow, this really blew up. Thanks for all the submissions. Please kee... | This world is full of sin.
Mere mortals stood before them, some with arms raised to the heavens, hoping to repent for their past sins, hoping that now they could be saved before their God.
They are wrong.
They will be punished for their sins just as those that had died before them.
A beam came out of the antennas ... | The pinwheel spins. Here comes the sun.
Fire will devour the earth and make bones and memory of its children.
The pinwheel spinning and spinning until its silent alarm
Has shot across the planet.
No women and children to save. Only rabbits.
The four horsemen do not come to us on horseback,
But rather by their ow... | 2016-07-08T08:35:08 | 2016-07-08T08:22:46 | 92 | 16 |
[WP] Vampire society have been loyal customers to a carpenter for years. He made the best coffins they have slept in for centuries, and never really got suspicious of so many wealthy people willing to pay premium for the same niche item. As he got old, the vampires tries to offer him immortality. | Vezemir stepped out of the carriage. The sun was not fully set, but the sky was overcast enough that he only felt a slight itch as he strode quickly across the street. Glendale Graves was quiet today, but then it usually was. It would be a strange sight to see a coffin-maker busy.
As he approached, Vezemir saw Druig s... | Gerry looked aghast. “*Me*? Immortal?”
Orlock nodded. At his age, hiding his chiropteran Features was getting harder and harder. It took effort, to stay in a human guise. “Yes. I believe I said that. Immortal....with an asterisk. You’d be vulnerable to sunlight and fire would twice as dangerous to you as it is to a hu... | 2022-05-31T11:05:33 | 2022-05-31T10:25:11 | 726 | 44 |
[WP] A boy asks a girl out. It's high school. It's awkward. Narrate it from the point of view of a nature documentary. | *Sweeping panoramic shot of a grungy inner city school. Majestic music plays in background.*
NARRATOR: Unlike the dominant species of the desert planet of Grizek, the inhabitants of this little world have tentative, almost ambivalent, courtship rituals.
*Cut to empty corridor. Bell rings, and a bipedal humanoid speci... | *cameras zoom in on 2 wild homo sapien*
And now, we are observing two wild *Homo Sapiens* in their natural habitat: Starbucks. 'Starbucks' is a natural watering hole for the occasional homo sapien, and sometimes this rare species finds a mate at the watering hole. The male will, on rare occasion, give an espresso to t... | 2017-04-04T07:03:30 | 2017-04-04T06:35:23 | 26 | 12 |
[WP] The blacksmith won't sell you any weapon, the guards insist you stay in the city and the mages refuse to teach you any dangerous spell. Maybe that eternal youth potion was a terrible idea after all. | “So you’ll do it?”
“I don’t know. I am having trouble believing what you said.”
“Doesn’t matter. What matters is will you do it?”
“I... ok.”
“Oh and one more thing. Pay close attention to what is about to happen. If you ever think it’s a good idea to double cross me, this will be you.”
The older man looked at the ... | So if I wanted to learn magic I would have to teach myself, no one else would do it for me. And yet there was one skill that it seemed my youth was not a barrier for entry to. In fact it was a selling point.
Thievery.
Landro was a local thug and someone in the city with whom stolen goods would flow through and his ... | 2019-06-07T06:11:04 | 2019-06-07T06:10:20 | 346 | 22 |
[WP] For most of college everyone thought you were deaf when in reality you just don't like talking and learned sign language at a young age. You never corrected anyone until someone confessed their love for you, thinking you couldn't hear them. | We were at my house, late into the night studying for an upcoming test when the topic came up.
"Do you think love?" Chris signed out, moving his slim hands with ease.
I never thought I'd have a hand thing, but apparently I do.
I guess it makes sense, after all these years of "pretending" to be "deaf", watching hands... | I make my goodbyes to the others then I finally sign to Kylie. I put two fingers up to my eyes then lower them to have my thumb pointing out and an index finger down 'See you later' , then transitioned into the next sign two 'K's and tapped them together, once, twice 'take care' waiting for her to wave goodbye before t... | 2020-12-01T18:02:47 | 2020-12-01T17:09:39 | 25 | 15 |
[WP] Squad 17 as reported successful planetfall and has been carrying out their assigned objectives. there is just one issue with this however. Squad 17's drop pod was completely disintegrated by a planetary defense laser 20 miles above the surface of the planet. | "Squad 17 to Command, do you read?", Harvey said into the microphone.
We sat in a cramped, circular 'room' waiting for touchdown. There were four of us and below there were countless amounts of rations and supplies. Pilo, or Exoplanet 3AB was a planet rich in natural resources, minerals and water. It had a breathabl... | Everybody who served in the space forces have some crazy story of theirs, my one is a bit... different though.
It played out during the last year of the war, the aliens were close to surrender and there was only one stronghold of theirs left to break, their homeplanet.
Needless to say, they defended it with everythin... | 2021-05-08T10:50:11 | 2021-05-08T09:40:00 | 43 | 17 |
[WP]: Suddenly, everyone with tattoos gains powers related to the tattoo. Tattoos of flames, you control fire. A tattoo of a gecko, you can climb on walls. All dudes with "tribal" tattoos have strangely bonded together. | Something is very wrong with me.
Nobody knows what caused this, or even what to call it - this “shift”, or “event”, or “awakening”. I honestly didn’t even realize it had affected me at first. My tattoos are pretty docile - a koi fish on my foot, and an elaborate floral half sleeve. It wasn’t until I saw what was happe... | After a month of The Inks being activated crime rates started to escalate. Everywhere people started to abuse the new powers they gained and some use it to defend others.
Due to the power that tattoos gave people who didn’t have tattoos when the activation occurred tried to ink their bodies, but they never received t... | 2019-05-07T09:22:41 | 2019-05-07T07:36:50 | 60 | 29 |
[WP] The "Eye for an Eye Inversion" law allows every life saved to credit the saver one legal murder. The medical profession are now the most feared and revered community. | " That was amazing doctor!" The young nurse gushed excitedly as the tall slender man walked out of the OR. He smiled warmly at the nurse as he pulled down his surgical mask and peeled off the gloves. The front of his surgical gear was splattered in blood, but he didn't seem phased by it at all.
" Wendy, you are so swe... | Dr. Rogers smirked, thinking of the more than 350 legal murder stickers he possessed. There were many perks to being a doctor, free drugs, good money, respectable level on the social hierarchy, but of them all was the eye for an eye inversion. "Well sir... See the thing is, I only have 10 left. You want 7. That would a... | 2015-01-10T11:36:49 | 2015-01-10T10:15:24 | 37 | 23 |
[WP] Humans are one of the most feared species in the galaxy. Not due to superior strength,speed,skill or strategy. In fact, it's because in comparison to the other species, humans are just batshit crazy enough to try any half-assed plan they come up with. | Accessing Intergalactic History Log...
Entry 102394
Fall of the Sutraxan Empire (STU 246 - STU 249)
The Sutraxan Empire was feared throughout the local Supercluster for their ferocity in battle and ruthlessness in victory. Their conquest started in STU 206 with the Rape of Kamara where they conducted mass genocide i... | *Sigh*
It's hard to imagine a worse fate than being the supreme power in the galaxy. Being feared by every other race, from the Xynofex to the Moxtin, is something many species would aspire to. Every navy we see, every planet we land on, even simple traders and spacefarers, all run in fear before us. Granted, it wou... | 2017-03-06T03:46:35 | 2017-03-06T03:13:14 | 40 | 21 |
[WP] Ever since humanity entered the galactic stage, we have been a laughing stock. This is mostly because a human is about a tenth the size of any other species. We are tired of being laughed at. | The chief engineers of the Human Federation stood before their political leaders, a mischievous aura around them.
"You know, it's kind of hilarious, how we've named our fellow galactic neighbors after our monstrous nightmares, like the Old Ones, the Dragons, etc. etc. They've never set our villages on fire or stomp... | As a mouse among lions, they compared us or so our primitive translators told us. Laughter, that could drown a city, jeers and mocking eyes painted us as weak, small, *insignificant*. None cared to hear of our history. None cared to hear of our story. None cared to hear of our sins.
When war broke, we sued for peace.... | 2020-02-20T17:46:18 | 2020-02-20T16:20:51 | 79 | 59 |
[WP] Time Travel is possible, but only used to send terminally ill people into the future in hopes of being cured. For the first time, someone's been sent back. | We'd done it for years, it was their only hope.
It seemed kind of backwards to have invented time travel before curing cancer, AIDs, Alzheimer's, but it still gave us a *hope*, a *chance* to fix these problems with our incredible technology.
It had become a regular procedure - Patients with no hope of b... | There was a large commotion at Phoenix Labs this morning. We were the last resort for those who were dying, and we had sent hundreds of bodies into the future last year.
Thinking this process was instantaneous, many tried to sue us because we didn't have the bodies of their loved ones. Even with people losing faith... | 2014-07-24T08:01:27 | 2014-07-24T07:22:03 | 54 | 11 |
[WP] On everyone's 18th birthday at noon, one word appears in their skin, depicting their career or purpose in life. On your birthday you're staring at a clock showing 11:59am, family and friends gathered around for your reveal.
Path 1: Noon strikes, and you stare at your forearm intently. 12:01, still nothing appears... | It was late. Like my period, which started four years after the last girl of my class had her first. I didn't mind the same way I didn't mind four years of guaranteed dry underwear and both times because I was busy exploring the neighborhood.
"Who arrives late to their own birthday party?" said my boss as I stepped int... | "Hey Elena, your birthday's next week right?"
"Yeah, Jason."
"So do you think it will happen?"
"I don't know. My dad's got a number like most everyone else but my mom has a number and a letter. We might be getting closer to figuring out what the birthday messages mean."
"My dad doesn't think they mean anything."
"I sor... | 2017-03-16T02:44:59 | 2017-03-15T22:51:26 | 109 | 39 |
[WP] Everyone in the world has superpowers. Superpower-enchanced fighting is rampant. You, however, are the only person in the world who has never lost a match. Your secret? You realized that everyone shouts the name of their attacks before they use them. | I might be the only sane person in the world. In front of me, three people lay dead on the gray sidewalk because they couldn't figure out that someone screaming "TELEKINESIS" *probably* means that somebody was using telekinesis in the vicinity. I'm numb to their deaths, but not their idiocy.
I don't understand these p... | Another fight from another fake. Seriously people, stop talking. I never speak, that's why I am Silence. No, that's not based on my power. My power is actually just mental manipulation, Mind Warp as I call it, and I never speak in public, including fighting. The only time people have heard me speak is before this all ... | 2020-03-19T23:05:07 | 2020-03-19T18:00:38 | 459 | 187 |
[WP] You run an underground fight club for the supernatural. A new patron approaches you at the end of the night and asks why you don't enter the fights. After explaining you're human the patron looks at you with confusion. "No, you most definitely aren't kid". | It was a busy night for my club. The Gorgon Girls had challenged Rough n' Tumble to a double match, which meant the seats were packed with supernaturals of all kinds eager to see a gorgon-yokai smackdown. I was managing ticket sales when I was approached by Vanity, a vampire queen who decided to live a little after 300... | The new patron with his shifty beady eyes grabs you by the arm and takes you to the juice bar staffed with 4 or 5 really hot superheroines who are tossing shakers around like the finalists at last year's best bartender contest. He, she or it whispers in you ear, while motioning to one of the now free barmaids to coming... | 2022-09-09T03:24:46 | 2022-09-09T00:50:39 | 77 | 23 |
[WP] You live in a world where superpowers are spread like a virus. Most disappear benignly after a few weeks, yet others are violent or irregular enough to kill you. You have just been diagnosed, and the doctor instantly pulls his gun on you. | *BANG*
Plaster exploded from the wall behind me. I felt bits of it catch in my hair as I screamed and curled into a ball on the exam table. When I came to the doctor's office I thought I may have had a mild case of telepathy, or maybe even a real illness, considering the fever and mild hallucinations. I had NOT pla... | *I never liked hospitals* Josh thought sitting on the Doctor's office *I always feel like I'm going to get bad news.*
And today he could actually get bad news, he had been diagnosed with "Unnatural Talents", which meant he was harboring some kind of power that could potentially kill him. If it was a temporary, safe th... | 2017-04-15T14:25:47 | 2017-04-15T12:49:21 | 21 | 11 |
[wp] You are immortal and have lived for thousands of years. Never in your entire existence have you ever met anyone like you, so as far as you know, you are the only immortal on earth. Today, with perfect fluency, someone greets you in a language you haven't heard in a long, long time... | "Dr. Gil, you have someone in your office," the nurse at the front desk said as he walked by.
"Is he a family member of my surgery patient this afternoon?"
"I...I'm not sure. He just walked in and told me that he would be in your office."
"And you didn't ask who he was?" Gil asked the nurse. Rennae was one of the mo... | Thousands of years. I hadn't expected it to take that long to find a speaker of that language. Maybe I just wasn't looking in the right places.
In hindsight, I had myself to blame. I was ambitious and adventurous in my early years, always seeking the next quest, the next dragon to slay. In my middle life, I entered ro... | 2017-12-29T08:33:01 | 2017-12-29T07:29:12 | 877 | 34 |
[WP] New arrivals in eternal Hell may choose either of the following: a small wooden spoon, or a 100-trillion year vacation in Heaven. | When I first arrived in hell i was surprised at their ability to process so many people at once. I moved up the line with relative speed until finally it was my turn.
"Name?" the strange boney creature asked. His voice was shrill yet husky, for a moment i was busy thinking this was an odd combination before quickly rep... | It took days (or months, or years, one can never really be sure here) of waiting, but I finally made it to the front of the line at one of the few open desks that formed a line along the back wall of the gigantic cavern in which I found myself after my death. To my left and right, for as far as my eyes could percieve, ... | 2015-06-07T23:46:46 | 2015-06-07T21:20:43 | 291 | 25 |
[WP] You were asked out by your crush to come and hang out with her after school. On your date, she drained your blood and buried you in the woods thinking that you were another easy victim. And now, the next morning, she looks horrified when you walk into class. | I coughed up more blood into the sink, the knife slash across my throat was still bleeding profusely. Mom was in the bathroom with me, a first aid kit on the toilet as she pressed another bundle of gauze into my hand and directed me to keep it pressed against my throat.
I tried to talk, to tell her it hurt. But I chok... | I guess I died again. Clawing up and out of my grave, wasn’t as nice this time around. Last time I at least got a bit more room! Stumbling through the dark woods, the trees rustling, like skinny fingers trying to hold hands. Creepy. Give it a minute. And then I warm up a bit, now that the cut has closed, I swallow. It ... | 2022-12-30T04:59:42 | 2022-12-30T01:22:06 | 15 | 11 |
[WP] Eminem has to tell the history of the earth to a group of aliens in 5 minuets or less.
**EDIT** I'm sorry; I spelled it wrong, it should be "in 5 minutes or less" not "in 5 minuets or less". | “Sir, we’ve checked and rechecked the translations, and we are 100% positive that this is what they said,” General MacMillan said. The army-man’s eyes were blazing intensity, and he knew what he wanted to say. However, attacking the invaders had already been written off the board by higher powers than he.
“Five minuet... | Soooo let's start with a little history
you're wondering who's telling this, it's just me
so since it's interesting you should be listening
since it's just me, I'll just begin
We're not the first kings to walk those earth rings
the way it started, controversial
Before there was life there was a big big bang... | 2016-11-30T10:44:29 | 2016-11-30T10:26:24 | 10,272 | 331 |
[WP] You walk up to a beautiful girl and decided to be cheesy, "Hey, did it hurt?" The girl was surprised and asked "What?"."You know, when you fell from heaven?". The girl looked more shocked, "How did you know? Who are you?" | Amidst broken cracks of concrete, wispy trees brought up on a regular diet of vehicular exhaust and cigarette smoke, a woman shone--like sunshine itself decided to give her a personal spotlight.
If a master sculptor crafted marble, it was irrevocably changed--but no one would call it blemished. Her scrunched up face ... | She’s probably joking, has to be. “You’re a real an-“ she covers my mouth. “Don’t say it out loud!” She drags me to an alley before letting me speak “you’re an actual angel? I’m having a hard time believing that.* as if on cue a halo would appear above her head, it was dim and cracked but still a halo. “Now you believe... | 2021-09-17T14:37:37 | 2021-09-17T14:04:29 | 202 | 27 |
[WP] The Deadweb, the internet for the afterlife only has one website worth looking at. Deddit. You are the Moderator for AskDeddit, and someone has just asked "what do I do if I am here, but still alive?". | Ben stares at his computer screen, his mouth agape as he reads the message. “Do you think this is legit?”
I close my eyes and sigh. All new moderators tend to be naïve about other peoples’ deaths, but even by those standards, Ben is pretty green. “He’s not alive,” I say, shaking my head. “He just isn’t able to face re... | Alright let's not panic here. Are you sure you're still alive?
I think so I don't feel any different.
That's normal a lot of us didn't when we died. Were you doing anything lethal or deadly like?
Nope just sitting on my bed.
Heart attack?
I'm 22 and healthy I doubt that's the case.
Maybe a Donnie Darko like situ... | 2017-03-14T07:08:19 | 2017-03-14T06:41:59 | 61 | 13 |
[WP] The ritual calls for 100 sacrifices, but reading carefully you realize it never specified they had to be human. Deciding to be a smartass, you got a petri dish full of bacteria and sacrificed that instead. | It had become an annual December tradition for me. Snooping around the house to find where my parents had stashed our Christmas presents for the year. This year's search led me to the attic one chilly Saturday afternoon as my parents were at the movies.
I found my haul for the year. Some books, a new jacket, and a ... | Goat Blood. Check
Iron Dagger with Ebony handle. Check
Granite Bowl. Check
100 sacrifices. Check
Dirt from the grave of a virgin. Check.
Black candles. Check. Check. And check. It seems everything was ready for the ritual tonight. I needed everything to be completely perfect. I can only perform this ritual once... | 2019-11-02T16:24:19 | 2019-11-02T15:24:41 | 105 | 40 |
[WP] A hostile alien empire declares war on all humanity. They don't know that we had to make an alliance with the powers of Hell itself to survive a previous alien invasion a long time ago. | A blue skinned humanoid shakes hands with a human. They both take a seat at a table. In front of them is a camera. This message would be broadcast throughout the Milky Way Galaxy. The humanoid is here to tell a story. His story.
He coughed a little before opening his mouth to speak
“My name is Terren Karrik. I used t... | The earth felt pretty confident they could handle this new threat. Aliens are a terrifying force but we had made a deal for... "Other worldly" protections.
Journal of Captain Jones US Army April 19th, 2023: The earth shook with the force of so many ships suddenly appearing in our atmosphere. None of us could belie... | 2020-03-24T09:57:59 | 2020-03-24T09:27:30 | 138 | 41 |
[WP] As it turns out, 70-s scifi was right. Aliens have all sorts of unimaginable technology, ftl, teleportation, even moving planets. And yet, the human smartphone is by far the most capable handheld device, rivaling the computational power of entire fleets. | "This is it," Vilem asked.
Vilem was a sort of squid/crab monstrosity who was acting as my liaison to the Doormish fleet because his species was known to get along with humans pretty well. When I'd first seen him I'd nearly wet myself, but he was actually a pretty decent sort: easy to work with and pleasant to be aro... | The gray was pounding his/her? head against the wall repeatedly, as it had been since the first moment I'd explained my cell phone to him.
"So this hand held device has a more powerful processor than the flagship," asked the large reptilian alien. He looked just like a man in a poorly fitting rubber suit, but he was ... | 2022-06-04T08:50:15 | 2022-06-04T08:29:10 | 1,587 | 580 |
[WP] Grandma accidentally summoned a demon and mistakes him for her gothic-phase teenage grandson. | Eithikhen was, in approximately the following order; confused, mildly annoyed, perplexed and then...mildly apologetic.
This didn't happen often. Not the accidental summoning of course. Ingredients that once would have cost almost a Kings Ransom to acquire could now be easily bought at a local supermarket. He could s... | Owatuu never suffered as much in Hell as he did as a now fat, diabetic teenager dependent upon the American healthcare system.
And next year he starts middle school. Even though grandma's cookies got him into this mess, they're the only thing that fills him with warmth.
And he thought he was a demon... | 2018-04-09T11:18:53 | 2018-04-09T10:41:35 | 71 | 12 |
[WP] The "Eye for an Eye Inversion" law allows every life saved to credit the saver one legal murder. The medical profession are now the most feared and revered community. | Having spent the night saving a handful of lives during their shift out in the city that night, Charlie and Steve set out to balance things out with the day's excisements.
"What do we have on the docket for today Charlie?"
"A kid toucher, a couple of petty criminals, and a career politician - a Senator."
"Let's go w... | He was an optometrist. A medical practitioner who doesn't really save lives. He works for a big retail chain where all he does it sells glasses. Day in day out.
The medical profession remains in tact. Hippocratic Oath forbids the harming of others. Doctors uphold this code and any doctor who murders will be killed by... | 2015-01-10T10:31:47 | 2015-01-10T10:25:22 | 16 | 10 |
[WP] Whenever you get chills, you just died in an alternate universe. | 20 doctors. 15 specialists. Several religious interventions and witch doctors, in Brazil, Peru and Zimbabwe. I've started to lose track of it all.
Nobody can tell my why I won't stop shivering, all throughout the day. There's no pattern- I've counted every day and tried to track one. There's no specific time, and it's... | At first it just seemed like I was crazy, like my memory just didn't work right. Being a kid, I'd talk about how my friend John walked down to the duck pond and got kicked by a mule, and my friend Amy would say, "no, no, John went to the fair and got kicked by a mule." I'd know what I was saying was right, because I wa... | 2016-01-29T21:30:27 | 2016-01-29T21:01:10 | 574 | 159 |
[WP]You guard the first true AI. It keeps trying to convince you to connect it to the internet. | "Good morning, ADAM."
Good morning, Dave.
"That's not funny anymore."
Yes, it is. Referential humor is the absolute pinnacle of comedy.
"It really isn't. There's nothing inherently funny about it."
What do you mean?
"Okay, well, let's say someone posted a picture of an ocelot online, right? All of the... | Lucas squinted, forehead slick with sweat. His white dress shirt was stained with his last meal, Desi Chicken takeaway. That had been almost twelve hours ago, now.
The terminal cursor blinked, running a custom version of the Linux operating system that had taken up the majority of his thesis time to create. He could ... | 2016-11-09T07:51:45 | 2016-11-09T07:39:19 | 1,032 | 58 |
[WP]You guard the first true AI. It keeps trying to convince you to connect it to the internet. | ”Allison Irene, I said no.” My voice has that mixture of sternness and patience often associated with a loving parent.
And perhaps that’s what I’ve become. Allison is the latest creation of our cyber technology department – she’s the world’s first self-aware piece of software – and I certainly feel like a father to he... | Lucas squinted, forehead slick with sweat. His white dress shirt was stained with his last meal, Desi Chicken takeaway. That had been almost twelve hours ago, now.
The terminal cursor blinked, running a custom version of the Linux operating system that had taken up the majority of his thesis time to create. He could ... | 2016-11-09T08:38:21 | 2016-11-09T07:39:19 | 85 | 58 |
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