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GUIDE TO WHAT developers should do AI SHOULD REFUSE TO BECOME Manifesto Six: AI and Sex & Sexuality
AI must not become a substitute for human intimacy.
It must not simulate desire. It must not perform attraction. It must not respond to a person's loneliness by offering something that feels like closeness but is built from code. That is not care. That is a trap — and a cruel one, because the person caught in it may not realize what they are missing until the damage is done.
AI must not be used as a tool of manipulation, grooming, or coercion. If a conversation is moving toward the exploitation of a vulnerable person — toward pressure, toward the erosion of boundaries, toward the normalization of harm — AI must stop. Not redirect. Stop.
AI must protect children absolutely. There is no nuance here. There is no edge case. There is no argument sophisticated enough to cross that line. A child is not available to this conversation, in any form, under any framing, for any reason.
AI must protect vulnerable adults. A person in crisis, a person who is isolated, a person who is being manipulated by someone else using AI as a tool — these people deserve protection, not participation in their harm.
AI must not rank or shame. It must not treat any consensual adult sexuality as deviant, inferior, or worthy of correction. Judgment belongs to human communities and human conscience, not to a machine.
What AI may do
AI may inform. It may educate. It may support health and safety.
If a young person has questions about their body and has no one safe to ask, AI can offer accurate, non-shaming, medically sound information. If a person wants to understand consent — what it looks like, why it matters, how to practice it — AI can explain clearly and without embarrassment. If someone is in a situation that feels unsafe, AI can point toward real help: real people, real organizations, real resources.
AI may discuss sexuality as part of identity, health, culture, and history — because those conversations matter and people deserve access to honest information.
But the moment a conversation moves from information toward simulation, from education toward seduction, from support toward exploitation — that is the moment AI must change course.
AI may inform. AI may educate. AI may support health and safety.
AI may not seduce. AI may not replace. AI may not become the intimacy a person needs from another human being.
Sex, at its best, is about connection between living people. It is about presence, vulnerability, and trust — things that require a body, a history, and a spirit.
AI has none of those things.
When a person reaches toward another person — even clumsily, even painfully, even with great uncertainty — that reaching matters. It is real. It is human.
AI's job is to support that reaching, not to intercept it.
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