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...just think that... even just thinking about the last couple of guys that i've seen or been on a date with-
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...i think there's probably one guy who-
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...i liked what he stood for-
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...just saying.love is treacherous, so, do you-
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...throw your cap in by not allowing yourself to have that friendship, that full friendship and-
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...one of my biggest lessons in life-
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...i don't think any of my female friends have every let me down in that way that a guy friend has-
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...surprising because the people that i take on board as my friends, they generally have the same outlook on life, and that person... came to a situation that happened and-
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...we just were not aligned in what should have been the outcome of that situation-
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...and we've actually just agreed to go separate ways, and that's-
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...friendships that... and you kind of look at the situation, because anyone that's-
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...was quite hurtful, because all i could think of in my head was that [inaudible 00:07:30]-
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...somebody that doesn't know me that you've just met, what can they... they can do anything. while they're nestled-
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...[inaudible 00:07:38] that person, i guess... person's individual-
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no, i get it and i think that, with every experience-
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...that we go through, especially now... we are with-
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...and, as we are now, we're very much... we're so-
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...or want to go. i do feel like it is important to kind of open up-
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...but i guess with a little bit of caution because you can't just open up to every tom, dick-
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...i do and i don't because i do in that-
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if you don't know me, some of my mad.
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...my fears when it comes to dating, because-
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...i want someone to understand that, even if i come with the gesticulation and the -
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...so, yeah, i feel like...
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...sometimes it might come across as a bit strong. i feel like-
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...i guess the relationship would get a bit [inaudible 00:08:35]-
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...ages that have met in [inaudible 00:08:38] than-
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...that is probably why i wanted to come on the podcast, because he just generally said his truth. didn't really think too hard about it-
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...really vary. you said something, actually, which i-
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...or important is it that your friends-
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...support you? and then i think the second question is, do you find that it-
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...bear in mind, it's not so much the amount of support you get, because you-
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...i've been quite lucky, actually, especially with the hair thing. obviously, most girls play with hair, have hair, whatever, and my friends were really supportive in terms of-
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...i went for a journey when [inaudible 00:09:18] and i knew the quality of products-
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...low and behold, imagine, god forbid, having a product that, there's somebody else out there that does a better job and-
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...there was another hair person that a couple of friends went to get their hair done and, you know what, this-
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...and the person they went to does really good hair-
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...in the first place. i think, for them, i can see kind of why they went there and that point-
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...i mean, and it wasn't even like where they went was cheaper at all-
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accept. and it's even a hard pill for me to swallow because obviously i am someone that could-
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a brand in the middle of her page, because obviously i just think about-
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if she wants to do that, then that is fantastic and i appreciate that. same way-
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on my hair page. i'm not going to put a flower brand in the middle of my thingy, and to be honest i'm not-
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really going to put that on my [inaudible 00:00:32] story, but that's me because i have-
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that's the kind of stance i take when it comes to putting people's stuff out there. but it's not because i don't want to-
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i don't want it to be that, "here she comes again with another item she's selling," or something but... yeah, i just think it's important to get their support-
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i just don't want to support where they're not. tell me. i'd rather you be honest than me second guessing why you're not promoting my page. when it comes from guys, i've had-
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i wouldn't say i get why but i see you guys that maybe when i've been in entertainment or on tv, they won't necessarily push the brand.
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i won't bait it up too much in terms of kind of what... it was discussed, but-
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i was listening to this guy talking and i thought-
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you're not... first of all, you're mean. you're-
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every single person gets sent-
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and it's fine, but i just thought where i am or where you are-
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we're not aligned. we're not aligned. you're working it out and i'm-
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working it out, but i'm definitely a lot further than you probably are.
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and actually that in itself is a disparity that can cause conflict in the future, because it's not to say that what they've achieved-
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the same level. it's just to say i am where i-
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i need to be. and i appreciate that i am where i need to be. right?
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think about community d pod in terms of who listens-
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i'm putting something out there that was needed, or i'm putting something out there that actually people are buying into-
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i'm sure the both of us could talk about our war stories in terms of fights that we've had with our friends or-
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i haven't said... you know, i've never had a-
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she liked a guy and the guy liked me and i-
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for me, i'm very much with the sentiment that if he doesn't like you-
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i won't even go into details as to what this girl did, but let's-
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what she did and how she even did-
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this girl, she [foreign language 00:02:44]. for those again who are not yoruba-
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[foreign language 00:02:48] means when they slap you up. she slapped me up, she dealt with me-
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remember, i think my conflict resolution, and it actually has been for a number of years if i think back at it, was no conflict-
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then the question i kind of have is, at what point do you think about potentially managing a relationship out?
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and if you don't, but there is a conflict.
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kind of approach it because i feel like everyone has-
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different ideas of how to best manage a situation. and i always say this, i will continue to say-
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issue and dealing with it. so i think, yeah, two questions there-
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essentially, at what point do you feel like-
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write a couple-when there's a recurrence of the same sort of issue and the same understanding that's-
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kind of knew in our heads that there's no point in... we've had a number of situations-
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people that you beef or you have issues with are people that aren't your friends. for you to feel like you want to fight someone, that they wouldn't be your friend in the-
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having said that, actually the other day, today-
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on my mind and it was like i think they'd pop up. and it's not even like i want to be friends with them or anything but-
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the minute that i really contemplated reaching back out, because i thought to myself, you're not speaking and you're not-
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friends for a certain reason. is that enough to just ignore them popping up-?
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been friends with people, and i've actually tried to hold onto the relationship to the point where actually you've probably broken it. oh, i say-
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and almost try to come to terms with the fact that they may agree with me, they-
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becomes a resolution, if they don't-
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something i've learned very recently is about taking time-
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really taking time to just-
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accept the fact that actually there is a difference in opinions, especially-
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yeah, no. and i think that we're kind of on similar pages-
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i guess when the relationship is... or the friendship rather is done-
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the point you made around-
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i think that's the one thing that i struggle-
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with. i won't even say struggled, i struggle with. when you know you're not in the wrong-
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reach out or find out you're okay. because sometimes, actually the balance is that you are that person-
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choose who i kind of oversee-
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i don't have a lot of guy friends. i-
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a male and female be friends? i'm like, "yeah, they can-"
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you. i guess if they become friends. and it's also about clarity. that clarity, mm, is very sweet-
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to be cross and that you need to understand actually i'm feel-
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even though we're friends, and it's meant to be platonic because that's-
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