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cairocode
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MSP_POD_NLP

Dataset card Data Studio Files
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and i was fighting him and he tried to pin me down to hold me down from hurting him, but also hurting myself. and then he was like, what's wrong? what are you doing? what's wrong? and i was like, don't touch me. don't touch me.
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pinning me down to the ground and he's like, "what is wrong? what are you doing?"
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that i was assaulted and that i was living with ptsd.
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i remember him saying, "you violated my consent during our relationship." and i was like, "when? what are you talking about?"
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by definition, is a thing you cannot exactly consent to because if you know what's coming...
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and it kind of defeats the purpose of a prank. i wonder in ashton kutcher's days when he was doing punked, was he assaulting people in any capacity by surprising them with pranks?
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then what happens is that newbies come in and they think, "oh, you're a dom, so you must know something." well...
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and so it begs a question of when is it assault? when is it consent? and what do you do?
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and all of these banana focused things, like one of my friends brought me a muffin. one friend was dressed up as a banana, one friend did a...
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that somehow he manipulated me to change the scene. but that's not how my brain works.
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who will do that? they won't know their own limits. they will negotiate in middle of the scene, then they will claim consent violation afterwards. and so it creates a real sense of fear in people.
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and then there's the other way people do scenes, which is to negotiate every single detail of the scene. "first we're going to do this, then we're going to do this, and then we're going to do this."
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why did you do that? and he was like, well, i just figured i try it. and i was like, get up here.
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and i think we do a disservice to victims when we decide to say that people randomly kissing you at a bar is...
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it was a great experience. needles are pretty popular in bdsm, in terms of it being a thing people can do, not a lot of people do it, but you can do it.
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that wasn't black and white. i would love a justice system that said, "what is the context of why you did what you did?"
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"live your life scott free of issues and i'm so happy for you."
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and he looked at me, and his hand was still there and i went, "is that your move?"
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grabbed me, put me in a big... i was wearing a dress that day.
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... shirt and pants or shorts, and they're like, "brittany, stop taking off your clothes. you don't want to do this, you're not so-"
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... and a part of me is like, that's a gay boy. that's a closeted gay boy.
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he said in the video about seth that he would've punched and killed people. he's like, "i would've killed people, man, if somebody did that to me." i'm like, "if somebody pranked you by kissing a man?"
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in my head i was like, oh my god, is kissing a man so awful that you would kill somebody?
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then i have to assume this is just internalized homophobia, or homophobia, or some version of-
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kissing a man is the worst consent violation i've ever had in my whole life, which i just don't understand. i'm bisexual, so maybe that's why.
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that's because again, i just don't consider kissing random people assault.
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am i the only person that goes to the club to feel a body? apparently i am, because i talked to some homies about this.
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when a space that's traditionally, from my understanding since i was a kid, a space to go-
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... when i'm in bed with my partner, are they going to choke me, pull my hair, and am i going to call them dad?
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they're always like, "wait, what?" i'm like, "yeah." i remember i was going to do this scene with somebody and they were like, great, i'll bring the vibrator. i was like the vibrator, put that shit away homie.
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i'm an adult, they're an adult. i'm a youtuber. youtubers are introverted people, guys, we live in our homes.
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how else are you supposed to meet people except other... that's the thing, my audience is adults, my audience is 20 to 40 years old.
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it just seems weird to me that we live in this world where people say things like-
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... or if you're a creator, you can't even date other creators, because at this conference we don't want to be accused of sexual assault. it's like, "god damn."
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we're so connected. did you see the story that google maps is catching people in crimes?
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i'm all about that petty crime for just a thrill, you know what i mean? don't be catching people. it's always-
H
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... i don't understand this power dynamic that exists in trump's world during beauty pageants, but not bill clinton's world during the presidency.
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and she goes, well, monica lewinsky was a slut. do you know she slept with teachers in high school? i was like, oh, you mean adults raped their-
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... all of these things could be true. monica could have been a manipulative teenager that seduced her older teachers. don't get me wrong-
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at my school growing up because they engaged with students. and it's funny because a part of me was like-
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... these horrible people. then another part of me was these lonely, sad people.
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... linda, and i read all these books and i watch these documentaries, and i learn about the psychology of the human brain. i'm very uneducated, but from my understanding, there is so much that goes into this.
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then at the core of our humanities, our simplicity, our desire to love and be loved,
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... comprehend without feeling uncomfortable that they could have in any way, not known, right?
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i'm a big proponent of freedom, and i'm a big proponent of these conversations being had. i am happy to have these conversations in gross detail. i-
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... fee like, if you need to make it about me so you don't feel attacked, you can do that.
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i do think there's a space to have these conversations and to wonder these things out loud.
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look at the comments on my bts video and tell me that the world isn't sweet in so many ways.
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you've left the environments that tend to foster-
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no matter how many of my youtube videos you watch, you do not know 90% of my life, i share so many stories. i know those of you who've been following me for years-
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why are we allowing the predators to dictate our society? so strange.
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how are you going to fight predators by giving into predators? how does that make sense, people? then you punish the good people. it's just like-
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... it's funny because we have these moments as children where i really understand that idea. i understand the desire.
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they learned only because of efficiency, that laughter was better in monster's inc. if laughter wasn't more efficient than screaming and scaring a child-
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... isn't going to be even the basic standard of what a low-functioning-
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... part of it could be like evolutionary, genetics, i'm not sure.
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... interesting that we live in a society right now with internet where we can hear from all these people, where usually only their families would have to deal with them. or they'd remain or they'd become homeless, and then the-
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i understand there's this phenomenon where human beings are able to judge other people clearly, more so than themselves.
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in order to be heard you attack the other gender, that doesn't make sense to me. you told me as trans and lgbt people, you wanted to be accepted for who you are, but then you attack other people for being who they are.
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i grab my water bottle, i take a swag, and i go, "you've got to stay going, homie says, you got to stay going." i go, i go, i go... oh.
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... like two miles, and i went three that day. it was amazing, and i was really proud of myself because for me it's really hard to do cardio. it's really hard to do cardio. that was me.
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i love that i've been able to do giving-work for years, and i'm so blessed. i have a professional job i can always rely on-
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... but i don't. i hopefully will never have to go back to that.
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i would love it, because we sit in bed and yell at the tv and probably throw cheetos at it. then smoke some big cigarettes then-
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there's something that when you're in this industry, especially as comedians, or youtubers, or anything else, you see the hypocrisy.
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... tell you how many feminists wanted to have drunk sex with me, or drunk bdsm or drunk, whatever. i tried to explain to them, "you cannot be intoxicated, because i don't know-
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... if you're really consenting yet. we should be sober the first time we interact. we should build trust.
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they said they were insecure, that they didn't know how to consent. they wanted to consent sober saying, "yes, i want to do this, but i want to do it drunk," because they were too shy to do it sober. i was like, "then you don't really want to do it, homie."
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... that by engaging activity like this you are putting yourself at risk, and you must accept the consequences.
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you must accept that somebody might also be... let's say you go to a rave, you take ecstasy, you're in a crowd of a thousand people-
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and you decide to start engaging with somebody while you're drunk-
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... does something that takes your drunk brain in the wrong way, but you don't even know how to defend yourself because you're already in this situation.
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i don't know how to tell you guys this, you can't walk down a dark alley naked.
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i would just like to walk down the street and feel like i'm going to survive a fight with a guy one-on-one, but i'm not. i'm going to have to be stealthy. i'm going to have to use tricks. i'm going to have to run. i'm going to have to scream.
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society has completely diluted itself into thinking there's going to be some beautiful utopia.
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... humans don't have the patience for it. the people who are advocating it don't have the patience for it. they're the same people who ask me to violate their consent.
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i'm content with that, because i have no control over 95% of the population. i think 95% of the population, you're the reason the world is the way it is. and trust me-
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... if you want to. if you don't want to, stay in your bubble.
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you need to be aware of that when engaging. please stop having sex with people you don't trust.
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you know what i mean, just stop. don't you know how to learn to trust people? learn to decipher if a person is trustworthy.
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... so they can't, so they're just like who they are. i accept those people and trust those people way more than people who pretend to be good. we all know those people, we know who i'm talking about.
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guys, thank you for watching. thank you for being part of this conversation. i hope that it was useful. i hope you learned something. please help me-
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... continue this as my living. if you guys would be so inclined, please check out spotify, and check out the podcast there.
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i'm excited to read your comments guys, it's the best part of my day. i love reading comments. it just makes me feel like i'm learning so much about the world. i'm sure i missed something. i'm sure i've said something that someone might-
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... could have better said. i'm sure i fucked up somewhere. let me know and i'll talk to you guys soon.
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she's wearing the same damn thing. is that just-
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yeah, it was painful, it was really painful to watch that. i think what's so disheartening about it-
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i can't even explain how traumatic this is for me.
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... first words, what about jinping? what about hong kong? what about taiwan?
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tear up because paranormal stuff makes me cry.
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like, "okay, this is kind of freaking me out because-
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the smoke. i don't want that smoke at all. you can turn the candle all you want.
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protect me if it is something dark. but i know you guys like my-
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hey there, lovers and friends. hi there, lover and friend.
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so i said to you that if you got pregnant with somebody else's baby-oh yeah.
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and i think that actually caused a lot of confusion for me growing up where-
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hey, now i started to be more sexual.
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most people did look at it like yeah, i can still love you and not be with you and not have contact with you, but the love can still exist. and i have that with-
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you have to lead with that. and so i almost feel like over the years, i've watched myself become less guard-
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when i don't know if you're going to abuse that, so...
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