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It worked. I’m sitting here trying to drink some wine and watch American gods and can’t bring myself to stop reading every sad / heartwarming story here.
|
azvko1
|
AddisonRulz
| 1,552,368,590
|
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[
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"content": "UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would be,. My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\n\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\n\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \"supposed\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \"caretaker\" that doesn't exist.\n\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \"making up for the time i've lost.\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\n\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \"You were put here to be her caretaker\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\n\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\n\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\n\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\n\n\n\n\n\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\n\n\n\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \n\n\n\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\n\n\n\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)",
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My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\\n\\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\\n\\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \\\"supposed\\\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \\\"caretaker\\\" that doesn't exist.\\n\\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \\\"making up for the time i've lost.\\\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\\n\\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \\\"You were put here to be her caretaker\\\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\\n\\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\\n\\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\\n\\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\\n\\n​\\n\\n​\\n\\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\\n\\n​\\n\\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \\n\\n​\\n\\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\\n\\n​\\n\\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)\", \"selftext_html\": \"<!-- SC_OFF --><div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>I'm back like I said I would be,. My <a href=\\\"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/\\\">original post</a> got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.</p>\\n\\n<p>I started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is "supposed" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a "caretaker" that doesn't exist.</p>\\n\\n<p>Suffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week "making up for the time i've lost." Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying "You were put here to be her caretaker". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.</p>\\n\\n<p>Today will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.</p>\\n\\n<p>I won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.</p>\\n\\n<p>So, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Edit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Late edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. </p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>We just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Thank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)</p>\\n</div><!-- SC_ON -->\", \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": false, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": 24050251, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": \"top\", \"thread_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"thumbnail\": \"\", \"title\": \"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\", \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 72778, \"upvote_ratio\": 0.96, \"url\": \"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/\", \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": false, \"wls\": 7}",
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"content": "Wow. OP's grandfather is a saint.",
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"content": "Too right my guy, the sad thing is is that he should have had to be as kind and good as he was. The parents where disgusting people who robbed someone of the necessary childhood experiences and felt no remorse for it.",
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"content": "Yeah I feel really bad for OP, it broke my heart when he talked about how all his toys got wrecked and no one cared.\n\nAnother angle that I'm not seeing being discussed: OP's sister is being robbed too. If the parents were told she needs a caretaker, then she NEEDS a caretaker. Maybe she would be able to make some improvements if she was working with a professional. I get that she's low functioning, but it's possible that she can sense the animosity OP was beginning to feel toward her (which is not his fault). Which could cause her to lash out more?\n\nIdk I have a severely autistic cousin (he is verbal and doesn't need 24/7 supervision though) and he has a loving family who is always there for him. I wonder how lost he would be without that support system. OP's parents obviously don't care about their autistic daughter, if they did they wouldn't push her off on a teenage brother who obviously isn't capable of handling that responsibility, or use her to scam their family.\n\nI just hope she will be OK. What are the parents going to do with her now that their free babysitter and money are gone? Are they going to pay for a professional caretaker themselves, or just neglect her? OP if you see this, this is NOT a guilt trip, but someone in your family should keep tabs on what's going on with your sister. It sounds like she may be better off in an institution then with parents who obviously can't or aren't willing to give her the care she needs.",
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If the parents were told she needs a caretaker, then she NEEDS a caretaker. Maybe she would be able to make some improvements if she was working with a professional. I get that she's low functioning, but it's possible that she can sense the animosity OP was beginning to feel toward her (which is not his fault). Which could cause her to lash out more?\\n\\nIdk I have a severely autistic cousin (he is verbal and doesn't need 24/7 supervision though) and he has a loving family who is always there for him. I wonder how lost he would be without that support system. OP's parents obviously don't care about their autistic daughter, if they did they wouldn't push her off on a teenage brother who obviously isn't capable of handling that responsibility, or use her to scam their family.\\n\\nI just hope she will be OK. What are the parents going to do with her now that their free babysitter and money are gone? Are they going to pay for a professional caretaker themselves, or just neglect her? OP if you see this, this is NOT a guilt trip, but someone in your family should keep tabs on what's going on with your sister. It sounds like she may be better off in an institution then with parents who obviously can't or aren't willing to give her the care she needs.\", \"body_html\": \"<div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>Yeah I feel really bad for OP, it broke my heart when he talked about how all his toys got wrecked and no one cared.</p>\\n\\n<p>Another angle that I'm not seeing being discussed: OP's sister is being robbed too. If the parents were told she needs a caretaker, then she NEEDS a caretaker. Maybe she would be able to make some improvements if she was working with a professional. I get that she's low functioning, but it's possible that she can sense the animosity OP was beginning to feel toward her (which is not his fault). Which could cause her to lash out more?</p>\\n\\n<p>Idk I have a severely autistic cousin (he is verbal and doesn't need 24/7 supervision though) and he has a loving family who is always there for him. I wonder how lost he would be without that support system. OP's parents obviously don't care about their autistic daughter, if they did they wouldn't push her off on a teenage brother who obviously isn't capable of handling that responsibility, or use her to scam their family.</p>\\n\\n<p>I just hope she will be OK. What are the parents going to do with her now that their free babysitter and money are gone? Are they going to pay for a professional caretaker themselves, or just neglect her? OP if you see this, this is NOT a guilt trip, but someone in your family should keep tabs on what's going on with your sister. It sounds like she may be better off in an institution then with parents who obviously can't or aren't willing to give her the care she needs.</p>\\n</div>\", \"can_gild\": false, \"can_mod_post\": false, \"category\": null, \"clicked\": null, \"collapsed\": false, \"collapsed_because_crowd_control\": null, \"collapsed_reason\": null, \"collapsed_reason_code\": null, \"comment_limit\": null, \"comment_sort\": null, \"comment_type\": null, \"content_categories\": null, \"contest_mode\": null, \"controversiality\": 0, \"created\": 1552330509.0, \"created_utc\": 1552330509.0, \"depth\": 2, \"discussion_type\": null, \"distinguished\": null, \"domain\": null, \"downs\": 0, \"edited\": 0.0, \"gilded\": 0, \"gildings\": null, \"hidden\": null, \"hide_score\": null, \"id\": \"eiank13\", \"is_created_from_ads_ui\": null, \"is_crosspostable\": null, \"is_meta\": null, \"is_original_content\": null, \"is_reddit_media_domain\": null, \"is_robot_indexable\": null, \"is_self\": null, \"is_submitter\": false, \"is_video\": null, \"likes\": null, \"link_flair_background_color\": null, \"link_flair_css_class\": null, \"link_flair_richtext\": null, \"link_flair_template_id\": null, \"link_flair_text\": null, \"link_flair_text_color\": null, \"link_flair_type\": null, \"link_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"locked\": false, \"media\": null, \"media_embed\": null, \"media_only\": null, \"mod_note\": null, \"mod_reason_by\": null, \"mod_reason_title\": null, \"mod_reports\": [], \"name\": \"t1_eiank13\", \"no_follow\": false, \"num_comments\": null, \"num_crossposts\": null, \"num_reports\": null, \"over_18\": null, \"parent_id\": \"t1_eiag7ex\", \"permalink\": \"/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiank13/\", \"pinned\": null, \"pwls\": null, \"quarantine\": null, \"removal_reason\": null, \"removed_by\": null, \"removed_by_category\": null, \"report_reasons\": null, \"saved\": false, \"score\": 380, \"score_hidden\": false, \"secure_media\": null, \"secure_media_embed\": null, \"selftext\": null, \"selftext_html\": null, \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": null, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": null, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": null, \"thread_id\": null, \"thumbnail\": null, \"title\": null, \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 380, \"upvote_ratio\": null, \"url\": null, \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": null, \"wls\": null}",
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"content": "There was a heartbreaking story on NPR yesterday about a family with a low functioning autistic son. Unlike OP's parents they truly loved and cared about their son and because of that they resisted putting him into a care facility. They didn't want to abandon him. They didn't want to feel like they were bad parents.\n\nTheir son hit and bit and broke everything. For his own safety, and theirs, they had to remove everything except a mattress from his room. For thirteen years, his mother did not have a night of unbroken sleep.\n\nIn the interview, the father described his feelings when they left their son at the facility. That his son probably couldn't understand how hurt they were, how much he hurt them, and how sorry they were. He only knew that the only people in the world that he ever truly knew were leaving him, alone, in a strange place. \n\nHe also describes the first home visit after that. How their son walked into a house that had changed so much while he was gone, but he didn't melt down. He was calm and happy. The care facility gives him appropriate activities throughout the day so he's never bored. They take care of him. As his father drove him back to the facility, he played a kind of game, where he says,\"The letter D!\" And his father responds, \"And D is for...\"\n\n\"Dumptruck.\" And then he said, \"And D is for Daddy.\"\n\n[\"Unconditional Love\", This American Life](https://www.npr.org/podcasts/381444650/this-american-life)",
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Unlike OP's parents they truly loved and cared about their son and because of that they resisted putting him into a care facility. They didn't want to abandon him. They didn't want to feel like they were bad parents.\\n\\nTheir son hit and bit and broke everything. For his own safety, and theirs, they had to remove everything except a mattress from his room. For thirteen years, his mother did not have a night of unbroken sleep.\\n\\nIn the interview, the father described his feelings when they left their son at the facility. That his son probably couldn't understand how hurt they were, how much he hurt them, and how sorry they were. He only knew that the only people in the world that he ever truly knew were leaving him, alone, in a strange place. \\n\\nHe also describes the first home visit after that. How their son walked into a house that had changed so much while he was gone, but he didn't melt down. He was calm and happy. The care facility gives him appropriate activities throughout the day so he's never bored. They take care of him. As his father drove him back to the facility, he played a kind of game, where he says,\\\"The letter D!\\\" And his father responds, \\\"And D is for...\\\"\\n\\n\\\"Dumptruck.\\\" And then he said, \\\"And D is for Daddy.\\\"\\n\\n[\\\"Unconditional Love\\\", This American Life](https://www.npr.org/podcasts/381444650/this-american-life)\", \"body_html\": \"<div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>There was a heartbreaking story on NPR yesterday about a family with a low functioning autistic son. Unlike OP's parents they truly loved and cared about their son and because of that they resisted putting him into a care facility. They didn't want to abandon him. They didn't want to feel like they were bad parents.</p>\\n\\n<p>Their son hit and bit and broke everything. For his own safety, and theirs, they had to remove everything except a mattress from his room. For thirteen years, his mother did not have a night of unbroken sleep.</p>\\n\\n<p>In the interview, the father described his feelings when they left their son at the facility. That his son probably couldn't understand how hurt they were, how much he hurt them, and how sorry they were. He only knew that the only people in the world that he ever truly knew were leaving him, alone, in a strange place. </p>\\n\\n<p>He also describes the first home visit after that. How their son walked into a house that had changed so much while he was gone, but he didn't melt down. He was calm and happy. The care facility gives him appropriate activities throughout the day so he's never bored. They take care of him. As his father drove him back to the facility, he played a kind of game, where he says,"The letter D!" And his father responds, "And D is for..."</p>\\n\\n<p>"Dumptruck." And then he said, "And D is for Daddy."</p>\\n\\n<p><a href=\\\"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/381444650/this-american-life\\\">"Unconditional Love", This American Life</a></p>\\n</div>\", \"can_gild\": false, \"can_mod_post\": false, \"category\": null, \"clicked\": null, \"collapsed\": false, \"collapsed_because_crowd_control\": null, \"collapsed_reason\": null, \"collapsed_reason_code\": null, \"comment_limit\": null, \"comment_sort\": null, \"comment_type\": null, \"content_categories\": null, \"contest_mode\": null, \"controversiality\": 0, \"created\": 1552332464.0, \"created_utc\": 1552332464.0, \"depth\": 3, \"discussion_type\": null, \"distinguished\": null, \"domain\": null, \"downs\": 0, \"edited\": 0.0, \"gilded\": 0, \"gildings\": null, \"hidden\": null, \"hide_score\": null, \"id\": \"eiaqm8v\", \"is_created_from_ads_ui\": null, \"is_crosspostable\": null, \"is_meta\": null, \"is_original_content\": null, \"is_reddit_media_domain\": null, \"is_robot_indexable\": null, \"is_self\": null, \"is_submitter\": false, \"is_video\": null, \"likes\": null, \"link_flair_background_color\": null, \"link_flair_css_class\": null, \"link_flair_richtext\": null, \"link_flair_template_id\": null, \"link_flair_text\": null, \"link_flair_text_color\": null, \"link_flair_type\": null, \"link_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"locked\": false, \"media\": null, \"media_embed\": null, \"media_only\": null, \"mod_note\": null, \"mod_reason_by\": null, \"mod_reason_title\": null, \"mod_reports\": [], \"name\": \"t1_eiaqm8v\", \"no_follow\": false, \"num_comments\": null, \"num_crossposts\": null, \"num_reports\": null, \"over_18\": null, \"parent_id\": \"t1_eiank13\", \"permalink\": \"/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiaqm8v/\", \"pinned\": null, \"pwls\": null, \"quarantine\": null, \"removal_reason\": null, \"removed_by\": null, \"removed_by_category\": null, \"report_reasons\": null, \"saved\": false, \"score\": 391, \"score_hidden\": false, \"secure_media\": null, \"secure_media_embed\": null, \"selftext\": null, \"selftext_html\": null, \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": null, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": null, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": null, \"thread_id\": null, \"thumbnail\": null, \"title\": null, \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 391, \"upvote_ratio\": null, \"url\": null, \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": null, \"wls\": null}",
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"content": "Fuck man are you trying to make me cry",
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Preview mode - no LLM call made
|
I didn’t do that, and I honestly wish I had. I had moved across the country right out of high school, to a tiny university, and I was miserable. Ended up moving back home after one semester. And I feel like going and talking to a therapist would DEFINITELY have helped me, and possibly made me feel comfortable staying.
It didn’t help that the therapist I was assigned was a man, and every *therapist* I’ve ever been with has been female (my psychiatrist is male, but he’s really just for medication management.) And one of my big issues is self-advocacy, so I wasn’t in the right place to ask for a female therapist. Plus, he was the only ASD specialist on campus.
|
azvko1
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AedanTynnan
| 1,552,335,631
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And I feel like going and talking to a therapist would DEFINITELY have helped me, and possibly made me feel comfortable staying. \n\nIt didn\u2019t help that the therapist I was assigned was a man, and every *therapist* I\u2019ve ever been with has been female (my psychiatrist is male, but he\u2019s really just for medication management.) And one of my big issues is self-advocacy, so I wasn\u2019t in the right place to ask for a female therapist. Plus, he was the only ASD specialist on campus.", "body_html": "<div class=\"md\"><p>I didn\u2019t do that, and I honestly wish I had. I had moved across the country right out of high school, to a tiny university, and I was miserable. Ended up moving back home after one semester. And I feel like going and talking to a therapist would DEFINITELY have helped me, and possibly made me feel comfortable staying. </p>\n\n<p>It didn\u2019t help that the therapist I was assigned was a man, and every <em>therapist</em> I\u2019ve ever been with has been female (my psychiatrist is male, but he\u2019s really just for medication management.) And one of my big issues is self-advocacy, so I wasn\u2019t in the right place to ask for a female therapist. Plus, he was the only ASD specialist on campus.</p>\n</div>", "can_gild": false, "can_mod_post": false, "collapsed": false, "collapsed_because_crowd_control": null, "collapsed_reason": null, "collapsed_reason_code": null, "comment_type": null, "controversiality": 0, "created": 1552335631.0, "created_utc": 1552335631.0, "depth": 3, "distinguished": null, "downs": 0, "editable": null, "edited": 0.0, "gilded": 0, "gildings": null, "id": "eiavln3", "is_submitter": false, "likes": null, "link_id": "t3_azvko1", "locked": false, "mod_note": null, "mod_reason_by": null, "mod_reason_title": null, "mod_reports": [], "name": "t1_eiavln3", "no_follow": true, "num_reports": null, "parent_id": "t1_eiah6bd", "permalink": "/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiavln3/", "removal_reason": null, "replies": [{"_fetched": true, "all_awardings": [], "approved_at_utc": null, "approved_by": null, "archived": true, "associated_award": null, "author": "NA", "author_cakeday": null, "author_flair_background_color": "", "author_flair_css_class": null, "author_flair_richtext": null, "author_flair_template_id": null, "author_flair_text": null, "author_flair_text_color": "dark", "author_flair_type": null, "author_fullname": null, "author_is_blocked": false, "author_patreon_flair": null, "author_premium": null, "awarders": [], "banned_at_utc": null, "banned_by": null, "body": "Yeah you have to find treatment that works for you. I recommend a therapist to anyone who needs it because sometimes it just helps to talk to someone who can objectively study you. ", "body_html": "<div class=\"md\"><p>Yeah you have to find treatment that works for you. I recommend a therapist to anyone who needs it because sometimes it just helps to talk to someone who can objectively study you. </p>\n</div>", "can_gild": false, "can_mod_post": false, "collapsed": false, "collapsed_because_crowd_control": null, "collapsed_reason": null, "collapsed_reason_code": null, "comment_type": null, "controversiality": 0, "created": 1552336113.0, "created_utc": 1552336113.0, "depth": 4, "distinguished": null, "downs": 0, "editable": null, "edited": 0.0, "gilded": 0, "gildings": null, "id": "eiawcnt", "is_submitter": false, "likes": null, "link_id": "t3_azvko1", "locked": false, "mod_note": null, "mod_reason_by": null, "mod_reason_title": null, "mod_reports": [], "name": "t1_eiawcnt", "no_follow": true, "num_reports": null, "parent_id": "t1_eiavln3", "permalink": "/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiawcnt/", "removal_reason": null, "replies": [{"_fetched": true, "all_awardings": [], "approved_at_utc": null, "approved_by": null, "archived": true, "associated_award": null, "author": "AedanTynnan", "author_cakeday": null, "author_flair_background_color": null, "author_flair_css_class": null, "author_flair_richtext": [], "author_flair_template_id": null, "author_flair_text": null, "author_flair_text_color": null, "author_flair_type": "text", "author_fullname": "t2_e5fw7em", "author_is_blocked": false, "author_patreon_flair": false, "author_premium": false, "awarders": [], "banned_at_utc": null, "banned_by": null, "body": "THIS! My high school was great, they had actually therapists on campus. And it was really just talk therapy. She didn\u2019t do CBT, she didn\u2019t talk medication, nothing like that. It really was a space for me to talk, and then her to pose questions that I may not have thought of. \n\nA big issue of mine is feeling like I should be able to handle it on my own, or that I\u2019m somehow inconveniencing someone by telling them my problems. And the right therapist can almost make you feel like you\u2019re figuring it out for yourself, if that makes sense. My therapist never flat out told me \u201cthis is why you\u2019re doing that, this is what you need to do to fix that.\u201d Rather, she asked leading questions that allowed me to reach those conclusions. \n\nI\u2019m thinking back to therapies I did when I was like 13-15, and cringing at how closed I was to it. You know how young teenagers can be, they think they know everything; and I certainly felt that way. I\u2019m just thinking back, and I\u2019m impressed that none of the therapists choked me out. \ud83d\ude02 I think, at least in my case, the stubbornness came from the fact that I could see *what* I was doing wrong, but not understanding how to fix it. And probably conflating knowledge of the problem with knowledge of the solution. I wish I could go back and tell myself to just go in with an open mind, and do what the therapists recommend. And that they know what they\u2019re talking about. But, knowing my younger self, I probably wouldn\u2019t have listened.", "body_html": "<div class=\"md\"><p>THIS! My high school was great, they had actually therapists on campus. And it was really just talk therapy. She didn\u2019t do CBT, she didn\u2019t talk medication, nothing like that. It really was a space for me to talk, and then her to pose questions that I may not have thought of. </p>\n\n<p>A big issue of mine is feeling like I should be able to handle it on my own, or that I\u2019m somehow inconveniencing someone by telling them my problems. And the right therapist can almost make you feel like you\u2019re figuring it out for yourself, if that makes sense. My therapist never flat out told me \u201cthis is why you\u2019re doing that, this is what you need to do to fix that.\u201d Rather, she asked leading questions that allowed me to reach those conclusions. </p>\n\n<p>I\u2019m thinking back to therapies I did when I was like 13-15, and cringing at how closed I was to it. You know how young teenagers can be, they think they know everything; and I certainly felt that way. I\u2019m just thinking back, and I\u2019m impressed that none of the therapists choked me out. \ud83d\ude02 I think, at least in my case, the stubbornness came from the fact that I could see <em>what</em> I was doing wrong, but not understanding how to fix it. And probably conflating knowledge of the problem with knowledge of the solution. I wish I could go back and tell myself to just go in with an open mind, and do what the therapists recommend. And that they know what they\u2019re talking about. But, knowing my younger self, I probably wouldn\u2019t have listened.</p>\n</div>", "can_gild": false, "can_mod_post": false, "collapsed": false, "collapsed_because_crowd_control": null, "collapsed_reason": null, "collapsed_reason_code": null, "comment_type": null, "controversiality": 0, "created": 1552336847.0, "created_utc": 1552336847.0, "depth": 5, "distinguished": null, "downs": 0, "editable": null, "edited": 0.0, "gilded": 0, "gildings": null, "id": "eiaxgzq", "is_submitter": false, "likes": null, "link_id": "t3_azvko1", "locked": false, "mod_note": null, "mod_reason_by": null, "mod_reason_title": null, "mod_reports": [], "name": "t1_eiaxgzq", "no_follow": true, "num_reports": null, "parent_id": "t1_eiawcnt", "permalink": "/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiaxgzq/", "removal_reason": null, "replies": [], "report_reasons": null, "saved": false, "score": 3, "score_hidden": false, "send_replies": true, "stickied": false, "subreddit": "AmItheAsshole", "subreddit_id": "t5_2xhvq", "subreddit_name_prefixed": "r/AmItheAsshole", "subreddit_type": "public", "top_awarded_type": null, "total_awards_received": 0, "treatment_tags": [], "unrepliable_reason": null, "ups": 3, "user_reports": []}], "report_reasons": null, "saved": false, "score": 3, "score_hidden": false, "send_replies": true, "stickied": false, "subreddit": "AmItheAsshole", "subreddit_id": "t5_2xhvq", "subreddit_name_prefixed": "r/AmItheAsshole", "subreddit_type": "public", "top_awarded_type": null, "total_awards_received": 0, "treatment_tags": [], "unrepliable_reason": null, "ups": 3, "user_reports": []}], "report_reasons": null, "saved": false, "score": 3, "score_hidden": false, "send_replies": true, "stickied": false, "subreddit": "AmItheAsshole", "subreddit_id": "t5_2xhvq", "subreddit_name_prefixed": "r/AmItheAsshole", "subreddit_type": "public", "top_awarded_type": null, "total_awards_received": 0, "treatment_tags": [], "unrepliable_reason": null, "ups": 3, "user_reports": []}
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"content": "UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would be,. My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\n\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\n\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \"supposed\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \"caretaker\" that doesn't exist.\n\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \"making up for the time i've lost.\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\n\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \"You were put here to be her caretaker\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\n\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\n\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\n\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\n\n\n\n\n\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\n\n\n\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \n\n\n\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\n\n\n\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)",
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My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\\n\\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\\n\\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \\\"supposed\\\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \\\"caretaker\\\" that doesn't exist.\\n\\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \\\"making up for the time i've lost.\\\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\\n\\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \\\"You were put here to be her caretaker\\\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\\n\\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\\n\\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\\n\\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\\n\\n​\\n\\n​\\n\\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\\n\\n​\\n\\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \\n\\n​\\n\\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\\n\\n​\\n\\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)\", \"selftext_html\": \"<!-- SC_OFF --><div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>I'm back like I said I would be,. My <a href=\\\"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/\\\">original post</a> got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.</p>\\n\\n<p>I started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is "supposed" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a "caretaker" that doesn't exist.</p>\\n\\n<p>Suffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week "making up for the time i've lost." Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying "You were put here to be her caretaker". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.</p>\\n\\n<p>Today will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.</p>\\n\\n<p>I won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.</p>\\n\\n<p>So, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Edit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Late edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. </p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>We just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Thank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)</p>\\n</div><!-- SC_ON -->\", \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": false, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": 24050251, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": \"top\", \"thread_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"thumbnail\": \"\", \"title\": \"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\", \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 72778, \"upvote_ratio\": 0.96, \"url\": \"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/\", \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": false, \"wls\": 7}",
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"content": "I'm glad your other family is coming through for you, OP.\n\nI strongly suggest you still get a therapist to help you unpack the years of harm your parents did to you. \n\nAlso, yay Grandpa. He sounds awesome. \n\nGood luck, OP.",
"metadata": "{\"_additional_fetch_params\": null, \"_comments_by_id\": null, \"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"allow_live_comments\": null, \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"archived\": true, \"associated_award\": null, \"author\": \"NA\", \"author_cakeday\": null, \"author_flair_background_color\": \"\", \"author_flair_css_class\": null, \"author_flair_richtext\": null, \"author_flair_template_id\": null, \"author_flair_text\": null, \"author_flair_text_color\": \"dark\", \"author_flair_type\": null, \"author_fullname\": null, \"author_is_blocked\": false, \"author_patreon_flair\": null, \"author_premium\": null, \"awarders\": [], \"banned_at_utc\": null, \"banned_by\": null, \"body\": \"I'm glad your other family is coming through for you, OP.\\n\\nI strongly suggest you still get a therapist to help you unpack the years of harm your parents did to you. \\n\\nAlso, yay Grandpa. He sounds awesome. \\n\\nGood luck, OP. \", \"body_html\": \"<div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>I'm glad your other family is coming through for you, OP.</p>\\n\\n<p>I strongly suggest you still get a therapist to help you unpack the years of harm your parents did to you. </p>\\n\\n<p>Also, yay Grandpa. He sounds awesome. </p>\\n\\n<p>Good luck, OP. </p>\\n</div>\", \"can_gild\": false, \"can_mod_post\": false, \"category\": null, \"clicked\": null, \"collapsed\": false, \"collapsed_because_crowd_control\": null, \"collapsed_reason\": null, \"collapsed_reason_code\": null, \"comment_limit\": null, \"comment_sort\": null, \"comment_type\": null, \"content_categories\": null, \"contest_mode\": null, \"controversiality\": 0, \"created\": 1552323151.0, \"created_utc\": 1552323151.0, \"depth\": 0, \"discussion_type\": null, \"distinguished\": null, \"domain\": null, \"downs\": 0, \"edited\": 0.0, \"gilded\": 0, \"gildings\": null, \"hidden\": null, \"hide_score\": null, \"id\": \"eiaciy8\", \"is_created_from_ads_ui\": null, \"is_crosspostable\": null, \"is_meta\": null, \"is_original_content\": null, \"is_reddit_media_domain\": null, \"is_robot_indexable\": null, \"is_self\": null, \"is_submitter\": false, \"is_video\": null, \"likes\": null, \"link_flair_background_color\": null, \"link_flair_css_class\": null, \"link_flair_richtext\": null, \"link_flair_template_id\": null, \"link_flair_text\": null, \"link_flair_text_color\": null, \"link_flair_type\": null, \"link_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"locked\": false, \"media\": null, \"media_embed\": null, \"media_only\": null, \"mod_note\": null, \"mod_reason_by\": null, \"mod_reason_title\": null, \"mod_reports\": [], \"name\": \"t1_eiaciy8\", \"no_follow\": false, \"num_comments\": null, \"num_crossposts\": null, \"num_reports\": null, \"over_18\": null, \"parent_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"permalink\": \"/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiaciy8/\", \"pinned\": null, \"pwls\": null, \"quarantine\": null, \"removal_reason\": null, \"removed_by\": null, \"removed_by_category\": null, \"report_reasons\": null, \"saved\": false, \"score\": 9612, \"score_hidden\": false, \"secure_media\": null, \"secure_media_embed\": null, \"selftext\": null, \"selftext_html\": null, \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": null, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": null, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": null, \"thread_id\": null, \"thumbnail\": null, \"title\": null, \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 9612, \"upvote_ratio\": null, \"url\": null, \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": null, \"wls\": null}",
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"content": "Yes, yes yes yes yes on the therapy.\n\nHOWEVER, I would wait until you enter a college/university to begin seeing a therapist. This way, 1. you will be guaranteed confidentiality as an 18 year old, 2. you will likely be covered under a student plan that you pay for with tuition that will make therapy free, and 3. you'll have time to compose yourself when you're alone and really be able to sort out your feelings.",
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"content": "Yes, a lot of colleges have therapists you can see and you should make it a point to see on after getting on your own.",
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Preview mode - no LLM call made
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THIS! My high school was great, they had actually therapists on campus. And it was really just talk therapy. She didn’t do CBT, she didn’t talk medication, nothing like that. It really was a space for me to talk, and then her to pose questions that I may not have thought of.
A big issue of mine is feeling like I should be able to handle it on my own, or that I’m somehow inconveniencing someone by telling them my problems. And the right therapist can almost make you feel like you’re figuring it out for yourself, if that makes sense. My therapist never flat out told me “this is why you’re doing that, this is what you need to do to fix that.” Rather, she asked leading questions that allowed me to reach those conclusions.
I’m thinking back to therapies I did when I was like 13-15, and cringing at how closed I was to it. You know how young teenagers can be, they think they know everything; and I certainly felt that way. I’m just thinking back, and I’m impressed that none of the therapists choked me out. 😂 I think, at least in my case, the stubbornness came from the fact that I could see *what* I was doing wrong, but not understanding how to fix it. And probably conflating knowledge of the problem with knowledge of the solution. I wish I could go back and tell myself to just go in with an open mind, and do what the therapists recommend. And that they know what they’re talking about. But, knowing my younger self, I probably wouldn’t have listened.
|
azvko1
|
AedanTynnan
| 1,552,336,847
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"content": "UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would be,. My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\n\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\n\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \"supposed\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \"caretaker\" that doesn't exist.\n\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \"making up for the time i've lost.\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\n\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \"You were put here to be her caretaker\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\n\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\n\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\n\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\n\n\n\n\n\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\n\n\n\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \n\n\n\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\n\n\n\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)",
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My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\\n\\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\\n\\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \\\"supposed\\\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \\\"caretaker\\\" that doesn't exist.\\n\\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \\\"making up for the time i've lost.\\\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\\n\\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \\\"You were put here to be her caretaker\\\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\\n\\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\\n\\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\\n\\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\\n\\n​\\n\\n​\\n\\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\\n\\n​\\n\\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \\n\\n​\\n\\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\\n\\n​\\n\\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)\", \"selftext_html\": \"<!-- SC_OFF --><div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>I'm back like I said I would be,. My <a href=\\\"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/\\\">original post</a> got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.</p>\\n\\n<p>I started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is "supposed" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a "caretaker" that doesn't exist.</p>\\n\\n<p>Suffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week "making up for the time i've lost." Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying "You were put here to be her caretaker". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.</p>\\n\\n<p>Today will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.</p>\\n\\n<p>I won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.</p>\\n\\n<p>So, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Edit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Late edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. </p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>We just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Thank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)</p>\\n</div><!-- SC_ON -->\", \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": false, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": 24050251, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": \"top\", \"thread_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"thumbnail\": \"\", \"title\": \"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\", \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 72778, \"upvote_ratio\": 0.96, \"url\": \"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/\", \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": false, \"wls\": 7}",
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"content": "I'm glad your other family is coming through for you, OP.\n\nI strongly suggest you still get a therapist to help you unpack the years of harm your parents did to you. \n\nAlso, yay Grandpa. He sounds awesome. \n\nGood luck, OP.",
"metadata": "{\"_additional_fetch_params\": null, \"_comments_by_id\": null, \"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"allow_live_comments\": null, \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"archived\": true, \"associated_award\": null, \"author\": \"NA\", \"author_cakeday\": null, \"author_flair_background_color\": \"\", \"author_flair_css_class\": null, \"author_flair_richtext\": null, \"author_flair_template_id\": null, \"author_flair_text\": null, \"author_flair_text_color\": \"dark\", \"author_flair_type\": null, \"author_fullname\": null, \"author_is_blocked\": false, \"author_patreon_flair\": null, \"author_premium\": null, \"awarders\": [], \"banned_at_utc\": null, \"banned_by\": null, \"body\": \"I'm glad your other family is coming through for you, OP.\\n\\nI strongly suggest you still get a therapist to help you unpack the years of harm your parents did to you. \\n\\nAlso, yay Grandpa. He sounds awesome. \\n\\nGood luck, OP. \", \"body_html\": \"<div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>I'm glad your other family is coming through for you, OP.</p>\\n\\n<p>I strongly suggest you still get a therapist to help you unpack the years of harm your parents did to you. </p>\\n\\n<p>Also, yay Grandpa. He sounds awesome. </p>\\n\\n<p>Good luck, OP. </p>\\n</div>\", \"can_gild\": false, \"can_mod_post\": false, \"category\": null, \"clicked\": null, \"collapsed\": false, \"collapsed_because_crowd_control\": null, \"collapsed_reason\": null, \"collapsed_reason_code\": null, \"comment_limit\": null, \"comment_sort\": null, \"comment_type\": null, \"content_categories\": null, \"contest_mode\": null, \"controversiality\": 0, \"created\": 1552323151.0, \"created_utc\": 1552323151.0, \"depth\": 0, \"discussion_type\": null, \"distinguished\": null, \"domain\": null, \"downs\": 0, \"edited\": 0.0, \"gilded\": 0, \"gildings\": null, \"hidden\": null, \"hide_score\": null, \"id\": \"eiaciy8\", \"is_created_from_ads_ui\": null, \"is_crosspostable\": null, \"is_meta\": null, \"is_original_content\": null, \"is_reddit_media_domain\": null, \"is_robot_indexable\": null, \"is_self\": null, \"is_submitter\": false, \"is_video\": null, \"likes\": null, \"link_flair_background_color\": null, \"link_flair_css_class\": null, \"link_flair_richtext\": null, \"link_flair_template_id\": null, \"link_flair_text\": null, \"link_flair_text_color\": null, \"link_flair_type\": null, \"link_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"locked\": false, \"media\": null, \"media_embed\": null, \"media_only\": null, \"mod_note\": null, \"mod_reason_by\": null, \"mod_reason_title\": null, \"mod_reports\": [], \"name\": \"t1_eiaciy8\", \"no_follow\": false, \"num_comments\": null, \"num_crossposts\": null, \"num_reports\": null, \"over_18\": null, \"parent_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"permalink\": \"/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/eiaciy8/\", \"pinned\": null, \"pwls\": null, \"quarantine\": null, \"removal_reason\": null, \"removed_by\": null, \"removed_by_category\": null, \"report_reasons\": null, \"saved\": false, \"score\": 9612, \"score_hidden\": false, \"secure_media\": null, \"secure_media_embed\": null, \"selftext\": null, \"selftext_html\": null, \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": null, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": null, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": null, \"thread_id\": null, \"thumbnail\": null, \"title\": null, \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 9612, \"upvote_ratio\": null, \"url\": null, \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": null, \"wls\": null}",
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"content": "Yes, yes yes yes yes on the therapy.\n\nHOWEVER, I would wait until you enter a college/university to begin seeing a therapist. This way, 1. you will be guaranteed confidentiality as an 18 year old, 2. you will likely be covered under a student plan that you pay for with tuition that will make therapy free, and 3. you'll have time to compose yourself when you're alone and really be able to sort out your feelings.",
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"content": "Yes, a lot of colleges have therapists you can see and you should make it a point to see on after getting on your own.",
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"content": "I didn’t do that, and I honestly wish I had. I had moved across the country right out of high school, to a tiny university, and I was miserable. Ended up moving back home after one semester. And I feel like going and talking to a therapist would DEFINITELY have helped me, and possibly made me feel comfortable staying. \n\nIt didn’t help that the therapist I was assigned was a man, and every *therapist* I’ve ever been with has been female (my psychiatrist is male, but he’s really just for medication management.) And one of my big issues is self-advocacy, so I wasn’t in the right place to ask for a female therapist. Plus, he was the only ASD specialist on campus.",
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"content": "Yeah you have to find treatment that works for you. I recommend a therapist to anyone who needs it because sometimes it just helps to talk to someone who can objectively study you.",
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] | 6
|
Preview mode - no LLM call made
|
Right? They say he was put here to take care of his sister as if he wasn't the one born 6 years prior
|
azvko1
|
AntLib
| 1,552,390,970
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"content": "UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would be,. My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\n\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\n\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \"supposed\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \"caretaker\" that doesn't exist.\n\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \"making up for the time i've lost.\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\n\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \"You were put here to be her caretaker\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\n\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\n\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\n\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\n\n\n\n\n\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\n\n\n\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \n\n\n\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\n\n\n\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)",
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My [original post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/) got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.\\n\\nWell, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.\\n\\nI started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is \\\"supposed\\\" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a \\\"caretaker\\\" that doesn't exist.\\n\\nSuffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week \\\"making up for the time i've lost.\\\" Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.\\n\\nWell, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying \\\"You were put here to be her caretaker\\\". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.\\n\\nToday will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.\\n\\nI won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.\\n\\nSo, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.\\n\\n​\\n\\n​\\n\\nEdit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.\\n\\n​\\n\\nLate edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. \\n\\n​\\n\\nWe just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.\\n\\n​\\n\\nThank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)\", \"selftext_html\": \"<!-- SC_OFF --><div class=\\\"md\\\"><p>I'm back like I said I would be,. My <a href=\\\"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/awyi8k/aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap_sister/\\\">original post</a> got a lot of attention and seeing as you guys seem interested, here's my update.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, since that day I made the post i've been staying with my grandfather. The week's been honestly a huge change for me for better and for worse but i'll try to run it down.</p>\\n\\n<p>I started by telling my grandpa the story of why I broke down the way I did and to be honest, he seemed horrified. No one in my family knew my parents were using me as essentially a free care service for my sister. My grandpa told me some things that I don't feel comfortable repeating here but in essence my sister is "supposed" to be getting care from a professional and that my parents were ignoring that, along with this I was not supposed to be caring for her at all with her mental state as apparently she is a danger to herself and others. With everything else I told him, along with stuff like the movie indecent he was really mad and told me to not contact my parents without him there. He pretty much told me that he would be meeting with my parents beforehand and that he was going to be there when I sat down with them. It didn't end here either, the rest of the week consisted of other family checking in on me and telling me things my parents hid from me. This included the fact that my parents have been taking money from family to fund a "caretaker" that doesn't exist.</p>\\n\\n<p>Suffice to say, this week has been rough. But, the upside is that even through all this, my extended family has been giving me more love than i've felt in a while. My grandfather spent this last week "making up for the time i've lost." Encouraging me to spend time with friends and do things I want to do. My aunts and uncles have also been helping me through the week.</p>\\n\\n<p>Well, Saturday night I sat down with parents to talk. It went badly to say the least. They came clean to me about everything. They told me things I will not repeat here. But they did not apologize. My parents still claim that I some how owed my sister my time. My father even saying "You were put here to be her caretaker". I won't lie and say I was composed. After everything i learned I confronted them. On the fact that my sister needed a caretaker. The money my dad was taking from his sister, and a few other things. They denied it or made excuses. And in the end, we ended off in a worse place than before.</p>\\n\\n<p>Today will be my last time talking to them for a while. After talking with my grandfather and uncle last night, I'm not going back. Later today i'm going there and picking up my stuff and moving in with my grandfather. When I graduate high school i'm planning on leaving the state to go to school. My aunt has told me that the money she was sending my dad will be instead be coming to me from now on. My parents have called me twice since Saturday, neither of them were to apologize and only ask when I was coming home.</p>\\n\\n<p>I won't be going back to them. Right now I still feel pretty uneasy about everything but I feel like that will pass. The rest of my family is showing their support to me and honestly, it feel great. But in the end I lost my parents. Over all of this, i've learned something that I wished I saw earlier. I don't hat my sister. In fact I love her with all my heart. I should never have never projected my hate onto her. That was wrong, and someday I hope to make up for it. But for now I need to leave.</p>\\n\\n<p>So, there's my update. Thanks again for the support my original post got. I really appreciate everyone who took the time to comment or show me support. Thanks you.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Edit: Thank you all so much! I wish I could respond to every single one of you but my lunch only lasts so long. I'll update tonight how the move out went but until then, thank you all. I want to say that your support has been amazing and your kindness means more to me than anyone could ever imagine.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Late edit: Wow, I never imagined my story would reach the popularity it did. I know it's kinda cliche and i've said it a thousand times but thank you all. </p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>We just got back from moving my things out of my parents house. Every thing I wanted to take my grandpa and uncle helped move and it's at my grandpa's house now. I have my birth certificate, social security card, and every other document and record I could think of. My parents were quiet the whole time I was there. Shorty after I arrived my dad left with my sister and my mom only hovered over us silently as me moved. It took a while but as we left she broke down and told me she loved me and would miss me. I hugged her and said goodbye, and that was it. Even now I sit here and think if she really meant it. After this whole week of her not saying anything she waited till the end. I hope she meant it. Right now though, I think I just need to look ahead. Maybe one day me and my parents can reconnect. I hope so.</p>\\n\\n<p>​</p>\\n\\n<p>Thank you all for the advice and love. It's been amazing and i'm glad that through this experience I at least got some positive out of this mess. Will I come back? I don't know. If something happens and you guys still want an update i'll maybe come around again. But for now I'm going to move on. For all those out there who shared their stories with me, thank you, and I hope to see you on the other side. See you space cowboy's :)</p>\\n</div><!-- SC_ON -->\", \"send_replies\": true, \"spoiler\": false, \"stickied\": false, \"subreddit\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_id\": \"t5_2xhvq\", \"subreddit_name_prefixed\": \"r/AmItheAsshole\", \"subreddit_subscribers\": 24050251, \"subreddit_type\": \"public\", \"suggested_sort\": \"top\", \"thread_id\": \"t3_azvko1\", \"thumbnail\": \"\", \"title\": \"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\", \"top_awarded_type\": null, \"total_awards_received\": 0, \"treatment_tags\": [], \"unrepliable_reason\": null, \"ups\": 72778, \"upvote_ratio\": 0.96, \"url\": \"https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/azvko1/update_aita_for_despising_my_mentally_handicap/\", \"user_reports\": [], \"view_count\": null, \"visited\": false, \"wls\": 7}",
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"content": "Wow. OP's grandfather is a saint.",
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"role": "darkxxmist01"
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"content": "Too right my guy, the sad thing is is that he should have had to be as kind and good as he was. The parents where disgusting people who robbed someone of the necessary childhood experiences and felt no remorse for it.",
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"role": "Mrphobics"
}
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"Idr how old the sister is, but CPS or APS or the local equivalent if there is one should be alerted(...TRUNCATED)
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azvko1
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ArgonGryphon
| 1,552,331,519
| "{\"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"arc(...TRUNCATED)
| [{"content":"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would(...TRUNCATED)
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"I didn’t look back at the original one. Either way, all it changes is whether it’s adult or chi(...TRUNCATED)
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azvko1
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ArgonGryphon
| 1,552,332,585
| "{\"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"arc(...TRUNCATED)
| [{"content":"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would(...TRUNCATED)
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Yes! Yes this as well. Therapy will deff help you heal from how your parents treated you.
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Ariyanwrynn1989
| 1,552,328,305
| "{\"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"arc(...TRUNCATED)
| [{"content":"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would(...TRUNCATED)
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"You deserve a future. You deserve happiness. Take it. Every little bit of it. You have a good heart(...TRUNCATED)
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azvko1
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Ava17961
| 1,552,343,709
| "{\"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"arc(...TRUNCATED)
| [{"content":"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would(...TRUNCATED)
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"My god, I have noticed this phenomenon so many times. Thank you for putting it into words like that(...TRUNCATED)
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azvko1
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BariBahu
| 1,552,377,735
| "{\"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"arc(...TRUNCATED)
| [{"content":"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would(...TRUNCATED)
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Holy fuck. That was hard to read.
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azvko1
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Bjorn2bwilde24
| 1,552,332,921
| "{\"_fetched\": true, \"all_awardings\": [], \"approved_at_utc\": null, \"approved_by\": null, \"arc(...TRUNCATED)
| [{"content":"UPDATE, AITA for despising my mentally handicap sister?\n\nI'm back like I said I would(...TRUNCATED)
| 5
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End of preview. Expand
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