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Dataset card Data Studio Files
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You're right. I'm cracking up. Ignore me.
Come on, let's rock.
Hey, Sid. Just think if they make a movie about you. Who's gonna play you?
Oh, god...
Is Billy going to be there tonight?
He better not be. I told Stu to keep his mouth shut. I think we can live without EVERYBODY'S ALL AMERICAN for one night.
Billy's right. Whenever he touches me, I just can't relax.
You have a few intimacy issues as a result of your mother's untimely death. It's no big deal. You'll thaw out.
But he's been so patient with me, Tatum. You know, with all the sex stuff. How many guys would put up with a girlfriend who's sexually anorexic?
Billy and his penis don't deserve you.
What do you think about when you're having sex?
With Stu, there's little time to stop and reflect. But sometimes before, to relax and get in the mood, I think about Grant Goodeve.
Who?
Grant Goodeve the oldest brother on EIGHT IS ENOUGH. Remember that show? He was the one who lived off alone. He would come around every now and then with his guitar and sing "Eight is enough to fill our lives with love..." He had all these brain dead sisters and that idiot brother from CHARLES IN CHARGE. God, I was in love with Grant, he was so hot. The show came on every day after school right during my puberty years. Grant Goodeve was very instrumental in my maturing as a woman.
How does that get you in the mood with Stu?
During foreplay, I sing the theme song to myself. "Eight is enough to fill our lives with love..." It's a real turn on.
No way.
Grant wrote the song himself. I'm convinced the lyrics had a secret meaning, "Eight is enough..."
What secret meaning? Like a Satanical thing?
Watch the show, Sid. His basket is bigger than the one you're pushing.
TATUM!
Oh, Sidney. WHAT? A guy can talk tits til he's dead but the minute you mention an eight inch weenie. Watch out.
There's that sense of humor. I knew it still existed. Ohh, Sid, let's have some fun tonight.
Deal.
You heard Billy shut the fuck up.
Hey, Stu? Didn't you use to date Casey?
Why are they doing this?
Are you kidding? This is like Christmas.
And to celebrate this impromptu fall break, I propose we have a party. Tonight, my house.
Are you serious?
My parents are out of town. It'll be like my hurricane bash last year. Nothing extreme. Just a few of us, hangin'.
Remember, there's safety in numbers.
Yeah, okay... whatever.
Cool. See you guys tonight. Bring food.
If Tatum sees you she'll draw blood.
You guys can go up to my parents room? To talk and... whatever.
Guess, I won't be needing this anymore.
Why are you doing this?
It's all part of the game.
You're crazy both of you.
The official term is "psychotic".
You'll never get away with this.
So Stu, what's your motive? Billy's got one. The police are on their way. What are you going to tell them?
Peer pressure... I'm way to sensitive.
That was an ice pick not exactly the same.
Yeah, Casey and Steve were completely hollowed out. Takes a man to do something like that.
For about two seconds.
Before she dumped him for Steve.
And are the police aware you dated the victim?
What are you saying? That I killed her or something?
It would certainly improve your high school Q.
Besides "Takes a man to do something like that."
I'm gonna gut your ass in a second.
Did you really put her liver in the mailbox? I hear they found her liver in the mailbox.
Jesus, this place is packed.
We had a run in the mass murder section.
You coming tonight?
Yeah, I'm off early curfew you know. Now that's poor taste.
What?
If you were the only suspect in a senseless bloodbath would you be standing in the horror section?
It was all a misunderstanding. He didn't do anything.
You're such a little lap dog. He's got killer printed all over his forehead.
The why'd the police let him go?
Because, obviously they don't watch enough movies. This is standard horror movie stuff. PROM NIGHT revisited.
Why would he want to kill his own girlfriend?
There's always some stupid bullshit reason to kill your girlfriend. That's the beauty of it all. Simplicity. Besides, if it's too complicated you lose your target audience.
So what's his reason?
Maybe Sidney wouldn't have sex with him.
She's saving herself for you.
Could be. Now that Billy's tried to mutilate her, you think Sid would go out with me?
I think her father did it. How come they can't find his ass?
Because he's probably dead. His body will come popping out in the last reel somewhere... eyes gauged. See, the police are always off track with this shit, if they'd watch PROM NIGHT they'd save time. There's formula to it. A very simple one. Everyone's always a suspect the father, the principal, the town derelict...
Which is you...
So while they're off investigating a dead end, Billy, who's been written off as a suspect, is busy planning his next hunting expedition.
You're absolutely right. I'm the first to admit it. If this were a scary movie, I'd be the prime suspect.
And what would be your motive?
It's 1995 motives are incidental.
I thought everything was checked out.
I had 'em hid in the foreign section.
We could be like two grief stricken students and we'll say really nice things about our good friends who were slaughtered senselessly.
I can cry on cue.
What's Leatherface doing here?
He came to make up.
There goes my chance with Sid.
Like you had one.
I wanna see Jamie Lee's breasts. When do we see Jamie Lee's breasts?
Not until TRADING PLACES in '83. Jamie Lee was always the virgin in horror movies. She didn't show her tits until she went legit.
There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to successfully survive a horror movie. For instance: 1. You can never have sex. The minute you get a little nookie you're as good as gone. Sex always equals death. 2. Never drink or do drugs. The sin factor. It's an extension of number one. And 3. Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances, say "I'll be right back."
Wanna another beer?
Yeah.
I'll be right back.
His movie nut mind has snapped, Sid. He's gone psycho.
Don't listen to him. It's him. He's the one.
Come on, Sid. Give me the gun.
No, Sid.
THE FOG, TERROR TRAIN, PROM NIGHT How come Jamie Lee Curtis is in all these movies?
She's the Scream Queen.
Stop. Right there.
Don't shoot. It's me.
Don't come any closer.