garcianacho/Scripts · Datasets at Hugging Face

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I need you to pick up the cake tomorrow.
Don't we already have someone to do that for us?
Yeah. You.
Okay. Okay.
That means we get five hundred thousand to help raise the kids.
No.
Yes.
It's okay...It's okay baby. Cry for Mama. Cry for Mama.
No it's not okay. It's not.
Cry for Boom Boom. It's okay.
Liz we've got to cancel, we have to put it off.
Don't even.
Do you love me?
What?
Do you love me?
What kind of stupid question is that?
Oh God. We. Liz. We. We. Killed a woman. We...
What are you talking about?
Oh Liz. We. God. We, in Vegas. Micheal crushed her skull. She was dead. There was nothing else to do. It was an accident.
Who's dead?
The prostitute.
You fucked a prostitute?
No Micheal did. It was an accident.
You killed a prostitute.
Micheal, by accident.
Call the police.
It's too late.
My God. You've got to call the police, tell them it was an accident. Where is she?
She's in the desert. She's out in the desert.
You left a dead prostitute out in the desert? Alone?
She's not alone...She's...Boyd...Oh God...He's gone nuts...He killed Lois and Micheal...it's all...
Stop! You stop right here. I don't want to know anymore. I told you not to do this Bachelor Party thing. You were warned.
But...
No buts. I told you your friends were Jackasses.
But...
No buts. I've waited twentyseven years, twentyseven years I have focused and prepared to walk down that aisle. I will not be derailed! I will not be embarrassed! I will not be denied! I am walking down that aisle tomorrow come hell or high fucking water!
I told Boyd two fucking minutes!
What money?
He kept saying he was protected.
What does that mean?
Like if something happened to him, he could still get us.
Like how?
I don't know. He could have told someone. He could have, like in the event of his death, somehow let someone know where those bodies are buried.
The only proof is those bodies.
So what do we do?
Move the bodies.
Move the bodies?
I...Liz...all I ever wanted, was for you to be happy. I just wanted to give you the wedding, the life you always dreamed of... ...I just love you so much...So much...
You and Moore move the bodies and bury Boyd with them. In fact, put Moore in the ground too.
What?
If you don't tie up all the loose ends it'll never be over.
No...
You put him down or don't bother coming back.
But...
Do you love me? DO YOU LOVE ME?!
Yea...It's great...seems like...I don't know you've got all the important stuff in there.
All right then. It's refreshing to see two young people not afraid of real commitment. Will you have friends or family saying words singing or anything?
Are we supposed to?
It's not a question of supposed to, it's an entirely personal decision... Some do some don't.
May we have the rings please?
What?
The rings?
These rings represent the commitment Fisher and Liz make to each other on the day. Fisher do you take Liz to be your beloved wife, to respect, honor and cherish till death do you part?
I do.
You're a fucking moron.
It's my fucking opinion.
The hell I did!
The hell you didn't!
The hell I did!
You said one in two marriages end in divorce.
I never heard that.
Nope.
Moore?
Your ideas never work out.
Oh really? Starbucks?
I don't hate women.
You hate women.
False.
True.
Not true.
You have a King fantasy.
I am a lover. In Africa, you can stay king as long as you can service your women every night.
And what happens when you can't?
New king.
If I'm the king of Israel, I say to myself, King, I say to myself, King... Take a good look around. What do I see?
Israel doesn't have a King.
Then what do they have?
They have a president. A Benjamin Yahoo something.
I say to myself, look at the map. Look what's all around you. People who wish bad bad things for you and your people. For thousands of years the Jews are fighting everybody. It used to be they'd throw rocks, then the iron revolution and they would attack with spears. Then the gunpowder revolution. Now they're shooting fire power back and forth, all day bullets flying, babies getting shot.
What's your point?
Now if I'm the King of Israel and all these sand niggers are armed to the gills and you know it's just a matter of time ...right? Am I right?
The Israelis can protect themselves. They got the Mossad thing happening. Mossad's for real, man. They scalp babies.
There's my point exactly.
What? What's your point?
Take Mexico.
What?
Lock up the chickens, dig up the holy dirt, pack up the wailing crying wall thing they bang their heads on all day long, stick it all on a big fucking tug boat. The whole country picks up and takes Mexico.
The Mexicans would love it. They're dying for a little order down there. They need direction.
They need leadership.
That's what I'm saying. Let the Israelis straighten it up. They got plenty of room down there, number one. Plus, and this is just a plus, they kind of look alike the Jews and the Mexicans. So I think on a whole your average Joe Mexican is gonna have less of a problem getting his head around the whole assimilation thing. Am I right?

I need you to pick up the cake tomorrow.

Don't we already have someone to do that for us?

Yeah. You.

Okay. Okay.

That means we get five hundred thousand to help raise the kids.

No.

Yes.

It's okay...It's okay baby. Cry for Mama. Cry for Mama.

No it's not okay. It's not.

Cry for Boom Boom. It's okay.

Liz we've got to cancel, we have to put it off.

Don't even.

Do you love me?

What?

Do you love me?

What kind of stupid question is that?

Oh God. We. Liz. We. We. Killed a woman. We...

What are you talking about?

Oh Liz. We. God. We, in Vegas. Micheal crushed her skull. She was dead. There was nothing else to do. It was an accident.

Who's dead?

The prostitute.

You fucked a prostitute?

No Micheal did. It was an accident.

You killed a prostitute.

Micheal, by accident.

Call the police.

It's too late.

My God. You've got to call the police, tell them it was an accident. Where is she?

She's in the desert. She's out in the desert.

You left a dead prostitute out in the desert? Alone?

She's not alone...She's...Boyd...Oh God...He's gone nuts...He killed Lois and Micheal...it's all...

Stop! You stop right here. I don't want to know anymore. I told you not to do this Bachelor Party thing. You were warned.

But...

No buts. I told you your friends were Jackasses.

But...

No buts. I've waited twentyseven years, twentyseven years I have focused and prepared to walk down that aisle. I will not be derailed! I will not be embarrassed! I will not be denied! I am walking down that aisle tomorrow come hell or high fucking water!

I told Boyd two fucking minutes!

What money?

He kept saying he was protected.

What does that mean?

Like if something happened to him, he could still get us.

Like how?

I don't know. He could have told someone. He could have, like in the event of his death, somehow let someone know where those bodies are buried.

The only proof is those bodies.

So what do we do?

Move the bodies.

Move the bodies?

I...Liz...all I ever wanted, was for you to be happy. I just wanted to give you the wedding, the life you always dreamed of... ...I just love you so much...So much...

You and Moore move the bodies and bury Boyd with them. In fact, put Moore in the ground too.

What?

If you don't tie up all the loose ends it'll never be over.

No...

You put him down or don't bother coming back.

But...

Do you love me? DO YOU LOVE ME?!

Yea...It's great...seems like...I don't know you've got all the important stuff in there.

All right then. It's refreshing to see two young people not afraid of real commitment. Will you have friends or family saying words singing or anything?

Are we supposed to?

It's not a question of supposed to, it's an entirely personal decision... Some do some don't.

May we have the rings please?

What?

The rings?

These rings represent the commitment Fisher and Liz make to each other on the day. Fisher do you take Liz to be your beloved wife, to respect, honor and cherish till death do you part?

I do.

You're a fucking moron.

It's my fucking opinion.

The hell I did!

The hell you didn't!

The hell I did!

You said one in two marriages end in divorce.

I never heard that.

Nope.

Moore?

Your ideas never work out.

Oh really? Starbucks?

I don't hate women.

You hate women.

False.

True.

Not true.

You have a King fantasy.

I am a lover. In Africa, you can stay king as long as you can service your women every night.

And what happens when you can't?

New king.

If I'm the king of Israel, I say to myself, King, I say to myself, King... Take a good look around. What do I see?

Israel doesn't have a King.

Then what do they have?

They have a president. A Benjamin Yahoo something.

I say to myself, look at the map. Look what's all around you. People who wish bad bad things for you and your people. For thousands of years the Jews are fighting everybody. It used to be they'd throw rocks, then the iron revolution and they would attack with spears. Then the gunpowder revolution. Now they're shooting fire power back and forth, all day bullets flying, babies getting shot.

What's your point?

Now if I'm the King of Israel and all these sand niggers are armed to the gills and you know it's just a matter of time ...right? Am I right?

The Israelis can protect themselves. They got the Mossad thing happening. Mossad's for real, man. They scalp babies.

There's my point exactly.

What? What's your point?

Take Mexico.

What?

Lock up the chickens, dig up the holy dirt, pack up the wailing crying wall thing they bang their heads on all day long, stick it all on a big fucking tug boat. The whole country picks up and takes Mexico.

The Mexicans would love it. They're dying for a little order down there. They need direction.

They need leadership.

That's what I'm saying. Let the Israelis straighten it up. They got plenty of room down there, number one. Plus, and this is just a plus, they kind of look alike the Jews and the Mexicans. So I think on a whole your average Joe Mexican is gonna have less of a problem getting his head around the whole assimilation thing. Am I right?