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CriticalRoleTranscripts

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SAM: Oh, it’s dark now, right?
TALIESIN: Yeah, but we’ve got night vision.
MATT: 60-foot. Maybe.
TALIESIN: Anything that we were going to do would
be near the road anyway.
MATT: Right. So who’s taking a look for a good
ambushing point?
MARISHA: Not me, I’m tired.
ASHLY: I will.
SAM: Ooh!
MATT: So roll for disadvantage because it is
night. Even though you have night vision, it’s only
a short distance.
ASHLY: Perception?
MATT: Correct.
ASHLY: Seven?
MATT: All right, you find a place–
(laughter)
MATT: I mean, it’s a road. So you guys have an
evening to– what do you want to do for your
ambush?
SAM: We need to plan the ambush.
MARISHA: We need to plan.
SAM: We don’t have a cart to block the road with.
MARISA: We don’t have a cleric who can Hold
Person.
SAM: What do we have?
ASHLY: Just someone with a lot of sordid history
with these motherfuckers. Skeletons in the
closet.
SAM: You could stand in the middle of the road and
distract them.
ASHLY: Yep.
MARISHA: That’s actually not a bad plan, just in
case.
LIAM: I would recommend– they will probably be
traveling pretty close together and I could slow
them down. Magically speaking. If you were to bait
them a bit and talk to them.
Then if we pick a trigger point I could cast
Slow… most of them, some of them would make it
through unscathed, but–
MARISHA: Would they kill you on sight if they saw
you?
SAM: What if we did like a–
ASHLY: I don’t know.
SAM: –like a Red Dawn thing? (laughing) We dug a
hole, and then we got in the hole–
ASHLY: You had one good idea.
SAM: –and they came over us and we popped out of
the hole and we grabbed onto the cart and we rode
under it and then we like chopped a hole in the
bottom of the cart.
LIAM: What does that have to do with the dawn?
SAM: It would be really cool!
TALIESIN: First: do we have any dynamite?
SAM: Oh! (pause) No.