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vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0412 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-19 | M | A | At night, on a country road, I find my way to the M's house, which resembles the home where my father lived with his large family. A truck appears to be heading this way, it's headlights glare in the darkness. I have fear but wonder, who is it? What do they want? The truck idles, turns round, leaves. Even so, I run to ... | 1FKA, 1MKA, 2JSC, 1MKA, 1FSA, 1MSA, 1FSA, 1MSA | AP D, SD 1FKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0413 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-20 | M | A | I'm happy, walking down a residential street, similar to Highland Place, headed toward a familiar wood. A young man with two off leash terriers heads my way. In my good mood I hold a pretzel up to the running dogs, which run and jump for it. But the pretzel is too salty. I withhold it. Further on, I pass a tall brick b... | 1MSA, 2ANI, 2MSA, 1ANI, 1ISA | HA D, AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0414 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-22 | M | A | In a basement similar to 39 Ivy Street someone demonstrates the properties of black crayons adaptable to floor tiles. The family dog, a young Shepherd Setter mix, begins to lick the black residue from the tiled floor. I tell her to stop, but the chalk is sweet and flavorful, and she will not listen. Finally, I grab her... | 1ISA, 1ANI | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0415 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-23 | M | A | In a cozy auditorium, My former girlfriend Karen and I attend a poetry reading organized by people we know. A man wearing a short brimmed cap steps to the stage. He has chiseled features, a compact build, a sureness about himself, much like a man known from actual poetry events. High on the wall to his left, hangs a bu... | 1FKA, 2JKA, 1MSA, 1FSA, 1FSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0416 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-24 | M | A | Evening. In a parking lot near the woods, I'm with two young men, about to complete a drug deal. One of the men, who is black, and armed with a forty-five pistol and money, is in charge. I grow impatient. What are we waiting for? The black man orders one of the dealers to hand me a Luger-like long-barreled twenty-two c... | 2MSA, 1MSA, 1MOA, 2MSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0417 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-25 | M | A | Out in a field, under a sunny blue sky, in the distance, a woman I want to meet. I can tell that her bear is tame, and I'm not afraid to call it. Even so, I start to run. "Come on! Come on!" I yell, as the beast, like a huge shaggy dog, trundles toward me. Closing in, I see its huge sharp teeth, its foamy white spittle... | 1FSA, 1ANI | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0418 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-25 | M | A | On the stage of a cozy auditorium three senators are grilled about ethics violations. With his back to the audience, Senator Sanders stands at a bookcase stocked with books on law. A black bound volume falls to the floor. Immediately the other books tilt left and right. Someone says, "You know where this is going." As ... | 2MOA, 1MPA, 1ISA, 1ISA, 1MOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0419 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-27 | M | A | I'm sharing a bedroom with a beautiful woman. She's tall, slender, blonde. We sleep head to toe, our beds arranged ten to fifteen feet apart. I have trouble breathing, several times clear my throat. Finally I get up, walk to the door. The woman, wearing pajamas, lies upon her bed, splayed provocatively. "You too," I sa... | 1FSA, 1FKA | HA D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0420 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-28 | M | A | The family of a famous activist visits my house for dinner. As we eat, behind us, at another table, a little girl with expressive eyes stares at me intensely. After the meal the family lines up to say goodbye, and I look forward to their hugs. But the two son's offer only brief embraces. Finally, the father a tall dist... | 1MPA, 1FSC, 1MSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0421 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-28 | M | A | I'm in Rowley, where Hilary Clinton went to college; I keep expecting to see her. In a large empty classroom, on a wide desk, I set up my computers: an old Apple desktop, its boxy monitor, my HP laptop. I want to view porn but students arrive. I have to pee. Returning from the bathroom, I find the desk empty. Is this t... | 1FPA, 2MOA, 1MSA, 1MOA | AN D, SD D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0422 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-29 | M | A | I'm with my old platoon on a firebase in Vietnam. An FNG obsesses about the shitter, located fifty meters out, near the wood line.<span style="display:none;">[218]</span> He fears being caught in a mortar attack and asks the quickest route to the barrel/box commode. I tell him, "My idea is less logical but more practic... | 2MOA, 1MOA, 2MOA, 1MKA | AP 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0423 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-30 | M | A | High on a hill overlooking a crater-like valley, I'm young, playing baseball with friends from Highland Place. Twice, in his familiar voice, my brother calls my name. I turn to see him with Bobby Golden and Wayne Simon. My brother tells me the theatrical play has been cancelled. I'm disappointed, frustrated. That's the... | 2IKA, 1MKA, 1MPA | SD D, AN D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0424 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-30 | M | A | I have the power to levitate and am slowly flying high above a city boulevard. "C'mon," I say, willing myself faster. Soon, just thirty or forty feet off the ground, I'm speeding down a country highway. Passing the mangled body of a crushed cat stained by blood and gore, I say, "I'm sorry." Next, I pass the large crump... | 1ANI, 1ANI, 1FSA | SD D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0425 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-31 | M | A | With a dozen men and women, I've entered a narrow rectangular room that is under siege. I take charge, handing out hundreds of gloves, pants, socks, shirts, which are tightly packed at one end of the room. A pushy volunteer asks an irrelevant question. I say, "Oh, don't tell me. You're a genius with a J." | 2JSA, 1IOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0426 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-31 | M | A | At a busy restaurant counter, I buy food for my brother and myself. "Seven fifty," says the waitress, an attractive, chatty, gaunt brunette who wears a paper tiara in her 1940s style hair. She places two large glass soda bottles and another item into a white paper bag, but I've forgotten the Danish, which sits on the c... | 1MKA, 1FOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0427 | 2016-2017 | 2017-07-31 | M | A | A man from my platoon gives me a computer tablet. Later, I boot up and find a dozen photo portraits of men in the platoon. In these 1969 close ups, each man stares directly into the camera, expressionless, unsmiling. Round faced or oval, pie faced or square, they are hollow, empty, grim. I recognize the barb wire and s... | 1MKA, 2MKA, 1MKA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0428 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-01 | M | A | In Washington, DC I'm in a posh hotel room with three fellow reporters. Our story assignment cancelled, we've decided to stay the night. The Frenchman, an acetic looking older man with a shaved head, in a thick accent, asks, "Does anyone have any stories to tell?" But there are concerns about security; the room may be ... | 2MOA, 1MSA, 1FSA, 2ISA | AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0429 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-03 | M | A | In Vietnam, I'm with my brother, high up in the dark sky. Very far below us, I see American and enemy troops. At a burst of machine gun fire I say, "Motherfuckers. Motherfuckers." I'm fearful of the falling bullets. When my brother urges me to keep quiet I seek shelter in his arms. The enemy ignites skyrockets that soa... | 1MKA, 2MOA, 1MKA, 1MSA, 1CZZ | AP D, HA D, SD 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0430 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-04 | M | A | I'm with My former girlfriend Karen and two other women. Dressed as 18th century English dairy maids in long skirts and bonnets, we're performing in a silent comedy of manners. At one point I embrace Karen from behind, and press my loins into her. From beneath her flowing skirt, I press two fingers to the cleft impress... | 1FKA, 2FSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0431 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-04 | M | A | Eerily, none of the lights in my bedroom at Highland Place will work. I try to replace them but with glass stems, not metal bases, the new bulbs are useless. On the floor, as if thrown down and abandoned, sits a white wood shutter, the two panels, at right angles, glued in place. But all the windows have their shutters... | 1ANI, 1FKA, 1MKA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0432 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-05 | M | A | On a bright day, in a grassy field, on an expansive lawn, I sit beside the living grave of Marilyn Monroe. Flat on the ground, the oblong headstone consists of translucent flower petals which form Monroe's black silhouette upon a background of white. Nearby, spaced a meter apart, the living graves of several young wome... | 1FPA, 2FSA, 1FSA, 2FSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0433 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-05 | M | A | In a foreign country, near a railroad station, hundreds of people gather in a large open field; a dance or celebration is underway. I meet a dark complected middle-aged Indian woman. She is sad and serious, and I ask her to dance with me. As we make our way into the crowd, she sees her husband with a much younger woman... | 2JSA, 1MSA, 1FSA, 2MSA, 1FSA, 1MSA | SD 1MKA, AP 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0434 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-06 | M | A | In a foreign country, possibly Mexico, I meet an older woman, prim and proper, and wearing an old fashioned straw hat. We decide to return to the hotel, but she will meet me there. After waiting in the spartan adobe-like room, with its sharp angles and perfect shadows, I grow impatient and leave. Careful not to be seen... | 1FSA, 1MSA | HA D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0435 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-07 | M | A | In a bathroom similar to that at Highland Place, a tall woman, slender and attractive, her golden hair tied in bun, says she's my mother. Undoing her white terrycloth bathrobe, she bares her breasts. Immediately I want to suckle them. But she is cold, haughty, and leaves. Standing there alone, I'm frustrated, confused.... | 1FSA | AN D, CO D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0436 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-08 | M | A | A baseball game is under way in a partially overgrown field similar to that at Elk Grove Camp. Fifteen or sixteen years old, I'm at bat, determined not to swing unless the ball is perfectly thrown. There is tension each time Steve Shack winds up to pitch. This time, slightly high and to the right, the ball roars in. I ... | 1MKA, 2MOA, 2MOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0437 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-11 | M | A | In the shapeless night things have fundamentally changed. My father moves slowly towards me, his large leathery face deeply lined. He's sightless. "I'm sorry," I tell him, and ask his forgiveness. | 1MKA | SD D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0438 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-11 | M | A | Everywhere is complete darkness. Hearing someone, I make my way toward them. "Where is everything?" I ask. What is that scraping noise? | 1ISA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0439 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-12 | M | A | On a beach in a foreign country, I walk up a tall sand dune, hoping people will look at my firm abs. Sitting on a skeletal wood platform, the life guard calls out in Spanish. Is he talking to me? He is not, but I would have ignored him anyway. From the top of the dune, hoping to see land, I gaze upon a half dozen gray ... | 1MOA, 2JSA, 1MSA, 2MOA, 1MOA, 1MOA | AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0440 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-13 | M | A | In a foreign country, I'm a front seat passenger in a car driven by a short black haired Indian man. There's little space between the front seat and dashboard; we're both nearly pressed against it. Two other short Indian men sit in back. At a cross roads, a sizable American car from the opposite direction veers head on... | 1MEA, 2MEA, 1FSA, 2MOA, 1ANI | AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0441 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-14 | M | A | With two homeless women I share a below street level spartan room. There's tension here. Our belongings are scattered all around the cement floor. I reach a breaking point, go berserk, lift the women, their possessions, off the ground; like rag dolls toss them repeatedly down. One woman, cocooned in a tangle of dark cu... | 2FSA, 1FSA, 1FSA, 2JKA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0442 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-14 | M | A | My brother and I walk along a sandy shore, much like Jetty's Beach on Nantucket. Suddenly, enormous seals rise from the water, repeatedly dive down, as they swim to land. Huge sleek animals, dark rose in color, the intelligent creatures have small narrow mouths, sharp pointy teeth. I take off running, jump over the wat... | 1MKA, 2ANI | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0443 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-15 | M | A | On a cold rainy autumn night, I'm walking down Highland Place, heading home. The lights of the second floor living room stream past the slatted blinds. As I walk up the staircase, the outer glass door swings loudly shut. The neighbors must be used to its annoying metallic clap. My mother stands in the open upstairs doo... | 2JKA, 1FKA, 1ANI | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0444 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-15 | M | A | I'm with my squad on patrol in a North American landscape of forested hills and valleys. Suddenly we're caught in an ambush. The roar of weaponry is overwhelming. There's little cover, nowhere to hide. I shelter behind the dead and wounded. I'm thinking, "So this is how it ends. I'm going to die." I pluck a full magazi... | 2MOA, 2MOA, 1MOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0445 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-16 | M | A | On a cloudy day, in a grassy field, I'm seated in the cockpit of a WWI biplane, trying to operate the controls. Rudder, clutch, joystick. I can't make sense of anything. It's so discouraging. I want to learn how to fly. The scene changes. In a larger grassy field, Skinny Bob and several men from my platoon sit inside a... | 1MKA, 2MKA | AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0446 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-17 | M | A | In a dark walled corridor similar to My old high school, my brother and I reach for bags of food sitting atop a small shed. "Who brought those here?" I ask. My brother names the person. Each paper bag or cellophane sack contains a type of bread. There are fluffy rolls, white loaves, soft round pita, scraps of twisted s... | 1MKA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0447 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-19 | M | A | Young and confident, I walk down the aisle of a large room filled with women, here to meet men. Large women, tall women, old, pale and plain women, fill the student chairs with their cumbersome arm rests. They are talking, hopeful, slightly anxious, looking about. Toward the right front of the room, I see an attractive... | 2FSA, 2MSA, 1FSA, 1MKA | AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0448 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-20 | M | A | At a summer day camp, I share a bunk with my brother's counselor, recognizable by his widow's peak, cleft chin, his stocky wrestler's build. In the darkened room, beneath the green Army wool blanket, as we sleep in the small bed, when Bob's arm touches mine, I inch away, imagine sex with Susan. The scene changes. I'm a... | 1MKA, 1FKA, 1ISA, 2JSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0449 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-21 | M | A | On a cold rainy night I sneak into Nan's big warm comfortable house.<span style="display:none;">[221]</span> The lights are out. I step quietly, telling myself Nan must be upstairs; old or sleeping, she can't hear me. By touch, I make my way to the kitchen, tuck a long cylindrical paper bag into a cabinet. I think, "Wh... | 1FKA, 1FSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0450 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-21 | M | A | Two or three times over several weeks four out of town women have inquired about purchasing the house next door. In fact, I learn that they live close by. There they are, with friends, crowded around a large oval table with friends, excitedly talking, eating, being served by middle- aged light-skinned man who resembles... | 2FSA, 2IKA, 1MSA, 1FKA, 1FKA | AN D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0451 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-22 | M | A | The writer Rod Serling and I discuss writing.<span style="display:none;">[222]</span> He describes how he analyzes each word in scripts sent by fans. Taking my notebook, he confidently draws multiple diagonal lines across the page. "Like that," he says. Detailing a recent story, he tells me, "Look. A man is interlocked... | 1MPA, 2ISA, 1MSA | CO D, AP D |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0452 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-23 | M | A | While my mother stand immobile at the kitchen sink my brother and I put garbage into bags. Among the debris, a long strand of black co-axial cable, which might be useful elsewhere. Both our parents, my father stands next to her, are dying. Somehow, my mother says, "You know, Marc, there are standards of care..." I tell... | 1FKA, 1MKA, 1MKA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0453 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-25 | M | A | At the top of a tall, darkened staircase I confront a mysterious man or woman, dressed in black. As we rapidly descend the spiraling steps, I shout repeatedly, "I'm gonna kill you, motherfucker!" The scene changes. In a low lit singles club with Jeff as I walk through a dark crowded hallway, a young man provocatively t... | 1ISA, 1MSA, 1FSA, 2ANI, 1ANI, 1MSA, 1ANI | AP 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0454 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-28 | M | A | With a community of men and several women, I'm living in an old brick castle-like mansion. We're doing laundry, communally sorting and washing clothes. Somehow my wash is folded and placed neatly in my laundry bag. A man tells me about a medicine he has used that would benefit my urinary problems. I tell him the cause ... | 2MSA, 1MSA, 1FSA, 2MSA, 1FSA, 1ANI, 1FSA, 1FSA, 1ANI | SD 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0455 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-30 | M | A | A man bearing a likeness to Donald Trump calls us to his large office building. He wants to somehow change it. No one agrees; we ignore him. A burly female cop, wearing a deep blue uniform, tried to boss me around. With ju-jitsu, I will throw her to the floor and pummel her. | 1MSA, 1FOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0456 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-30 | M | A | The sparse jungle offers little camouflage. Hiding here, the NVA will find me, will take me prisoner, march me down stony trails, causing my feet much pain. | 2MOA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0457 | 2016-2017 | 2017-08-31 | M | A | On a desolate farm, in a dirt lot, a very dark young Indian man, with intense, almost unmoving eyes, attempts to keep up with a frisky chestnut foal. As the energetic horse rears up, kicks, bucks, gambols, the Indian tries to mimic the animals unbounded frolic. The foal changes, becomes part kangaroo, its face, especia... | 1MEA, 1ANI, 2ANI, 2JSA, 1MSA, 1FSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0458 | 2016-2017 | 2017-09-01 | M | A | At night, in a foreign land, I go from one restaurant to another, searching for someone. In each place, there are groups of men, exhausted, blank-eyed and bloodied, seated around a table. Above them, perched on a corner shelf, curled like a cat, a bludgeoned man near death. The men are cage fighters, fresh from the rin... | 2MSA, 1MSA, 1MSA, 2MSA, 1MOA | AP 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0459 | 2016-2017 | 2017-09-01 | M | A | In a town like the town I lived in from 2001 to 2012. I meet a tall thin middle-aged cop who is tired, sleepy, and wants some place to rest. I know this man. He's a local cop. I tell him the library is close by; the staff will likely offer him an empty room. I lead the way, as we walk up and down the city's balmy stree... | 1MOA, 2IOA | AN 1MKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0460 | 2016-2017 | 2017-09-03 | M | A | At night, as people leave, I'm standing in a field, a pasture, part of a large dairy farm. I've said good-bye to Chris D, to other friends, tried to pet the exotic dog, part Dalmatian, part hound, with its tufted orange ears. For their presentation, the new farm team, the family who oversee the farm, quickly assemble a... | 2JKA, 1MKA, 2JOA, 1ANI, 2JSA, 1FSA, 1FSA, 1FSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0461 | 2016-2017 | 2017-09-04 | M | A | I'm in an airplane flying high over the earth, which is veiled by a cirrus cloud sky. Something terrible has taken place. A body, as if seen from a distance, falls from the plane, and I know who it is. The pilot begins a mournful dirge. Two young people doggedly sail past, snow boarding the air. From far away, a long b... | 1ISA, 1MOA, 2JSA | null |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0462 | 2016-2017 | 2017-09-05 | M | A | As an adult, I'm living at home with brother and mother and two new siblings, a boy and a girl. The problem is there are rats. I find one on the bed, another that has dug a hole in the dirt where my new brother and sister are at play. I charge into the small square kitchen, where my mother, who is black, and standing, ... | 1FKA, 1MKA, 2ANI, 1ANI | AN 1MKA, SD 1FKA |
vietnam_vet3 | Vietnam Vet: 2016-17 dreams | 0463 | 2016-2017 | 2017-09-05 | M | A | I'm part of a bombing mission over India. As we approach the target, the mission changes. What's happening? Why? All at once, the bomb bay doors open, like bowling pins, the bombs drop. I see the earth engulfed in a bright orange cloud, but there is no noise, no expanding shock wave. The bomber lands. The bomb bay door... | 1MEA, 2MOA | null |
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