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https://www.theonion.com/new-study-confirms-sharks-just-really-angry-dolphins-1825924575
new study confirms sharks just really angry dolphins
1
en
52
https://www.theonion.com/high-school-student-council-passes-nonbinding-resolutio-1819569010
high school student council passes nonbinding resolution
1
en
56
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/twitter-lawsuit-islamic-state_us_57abaaafe4b0db3be07d2228
twitter wins dismissal of lawsuit alleging islamic state support: federal judge
0
en
79
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/melissa-kidd-teacher-nude-photos-boob-job_n_7475074.html
teacher allegedly shares nude photos of her boob job with students
0
en
66
https://www.theonion.com/report-at-least-14-different-types-of-animals-crawl-on-1819572503
report: at least 14 different types of animals crawl on you while you sleep
1
en
75
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bernie-sanders-millennials-poll_us_56699fade4b0f290e5222a60
young democrats prefer bernie sanders, new poll finds
0
en
53
https://politics.theonion.com/nation-not-about-to-start-giving-a-shit-about-canadian-1819575817
nation not about to start giving a shit about canadian politics
1
en
63
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/obamacare-enrollment-9-million_us_5a3c23b6e4b025f99e15c6f7
almost 9 million people enroll in obamacare, despite trump's sabotage attempts
0
en
78
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bernie-sanders-speaking-fees_us_571419dae4b0060ccda38fed
would bernie sanders supporters take $200,000 from goldman sachs for a speech?
0
en
78
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/democrats-alabama-roy-moore_us_5a132f80e4b0c335e9967ff0
the best chance to defeat roy moore may be for the democratic party to lie low
0
en
78
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/snapshots-of-parenting-in-2014-_n_6277860.html
14 snapshots that summed up parenthood in 2014
0
en
46
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ryan-seacrest-squad-goals-tv-show_us_5620e966e4b06462a13b94fb
ryan seacrest sells 'squad goals' series to cbs
0
en
47
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pope-francis-rohingya-bangladesh-myanmar_us_5a23cb02e4b0a02abe91b66c
pope francis on meeting rohingya refugees: 'i wept'
0
en
51
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bob-corker-trump-stability_us_5995e1dee4b01f6e801ce808
gop sen. bob corker: trump hasn't demonstrated 'stability' or 'competence'
0
en
74
https://politics.theonion.com/biden-loses-control-of-butterfly-knife-during-commencem-1819576489
biden loses control of butterfly knife during commencement speech
1
en
65
https://local.theonion.com/new-office-manager-provides-terrifying-glimpse-into-pla-1819579815
new office manager provides terrifying glimpse into plans for regime by placing new collection of teas in drawer
1
en
112
https://www.theonion.com/quick-painless-death-tops-holiday-wish-list-of-local-v-1819564140
quick, painless death tops holiday wish list of local veal calf
1
en
63
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-lawyers-dish-on-russia-probe-at-steakhouse-as-nyt-reporter-listens-in_us_59c00bc0e4b06f9bf0487a6b
trump lawyers dish on russia probe at steakhouse as nyt reporter listens in
0
en
75
https://www.theonion.com/now-thats-what-i-call-shitty-music-8-tops-album-charts-1819587110
now that's what i call shitty music 8 tops album charts
1
en
55
https://www.theonion.com/4-hours-scrolling-through-facebook-before-bed-referred-1819578025
4 hours scrolling through facebook before bed referred to as 'winding down'
1
en
75
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/havana-gay-marriage-proposal-_n_7641570.html
this man's proposal to his boyfriend is a musical moment you need to see to believe
0
en
83
https://www.theonion.com/report-no-gay-people-actually-refer-to-selves-as-same-1819575190
report: no gay people actually refer to selves as 'same-sex couple'
1
en
67
https://local.theonion.com/83rd-birthday-party-stretches-definition-of-party-1819565617
83rd birthday party stretches definition of party
1
en
49
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/because-im-gay-in-high-school-legislators-dont_us_58540b39e4b0d5f48e164eaf
because i'm gay and in high school, legislators don't care about my health
0
en
74
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/christopher-nolan-netflix_us_5970ba92e4b062ea5f90179b
surprise, surprise: christopher nolan is not a fan of netflix
0
en
61
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lin-manuel-miranda-is-raffling-a-hamilton-date-to-raise-money-for-immigrants_us_58b49ea3e4b0780bac2c88ac
lin-manuel miranda is raffling a 'hamilton' date to raise money for immigrants
0
en
78
https://local.theonion.com/seeing-eye-dog-really-blows-off-some-steam-in-dog-park-1819572879
seeing eye dog really blows off some steam in dog park
1
en
54
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/full-podcast-seasons_us_565e01ece4b079b2818c18fc
7 full podcast seasons for your holiday binge-listening pleasure
0
en
64
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/watch-top-chef-michael-voltaggio-read-one-star-yelp-reviews_b_7502394.html
watch top chef michael voltaggio read one-star yelp reviews
0
en
59
https://local.theonion.com/frustrated-dad-at-restaurant-just-wants-a-normal-burger-1823390676
frustrated dad at restaurant just wants a normal burger
1
en
55
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/a-triple-amputees-dream-wedding_b_6924534.html
a triple amputee's dream wedding brings community together
0
en
58
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/arab-cartoonists_n_6440820.html
these 8 arab cartoonists fight for freedom of expression every day
0
en
66
https://www.theonion.com/biologists-still-uncertain-about-evolutionary-function-1823650230
biologists still uncertain about evolutionary function of ugly people
1
en
69
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/policewoman-flashed-more-than-her-badge-at-cop-conference-report_us_5739ee12e4b060aa781ac9fd
policewoman flashed more than her badge at cop conference: report
0
en
65
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ginsburg-supreme-court-vacancy_us_57d0b99ee4b03d2d459853a9
ruth bader ginsburg says 'cooler heads' should prevail on supreme court vacancy
0
en
79
https://www.theonion.com/elementary-schooler-clearly-just-learned-to-swear-1819566113
elementary schooler clearly just learned to swear
1
en
49
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bps-clean-water-act-fines_b_6542876.html
bp's clean water act fines will be smaller than gulf states thought
0
en
67
https://local.theonion.com/two-hipsters-angrily-call-each-other-hipster-1819568370
two hipsters angrily call each other 'hipster'
1
en
46
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/st-louis-police-officer-involved-shooting-jennings_n_7092114.html
man carrying knife and bible fatally shot by st. louis county police
0
en
68
https://entertainment.theonion.com/lara-flynn-boyles-publicist-warns-interviewer-upfront-1819587077
lara flynn boyle's publicist warns interviewer upfront
1
en
54
https://politics.theonion.com/reagan-to-be-honored-with-5-000-a-head-funeral-1819567404
reagan to be honored with $5,000-a-head funeral
1
en
47
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kate-ranta-domestic-violence-trial_us_57d5dc87e4b00642712e18c2
she was shot and survived. now she has to relive the worst night of her life.
0
en
77
https://politics.theonion.com/report-peaceful-transfer-of-power-makes-last-minute-pu-1819579368
report: peaceful transfer of power makes last-minute push to become most pressing issue of 2016 election
1
en
104
https://www.theonion.com/apple-announces-plans-for-new-ipad-with-extra-storage-d-1819574446
apple announces plans for new ipad with extra storage drawer
1
en
60
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/360-degree-photos-travel_us_577fe9bce4b0c590f7e93fbf
these epic 360-degree photos will make you feel like you're on vacation
0
en
71
https://local.theonion.com/teacher-frustrated-no-one-in-beginner-yoga-class-can-fo-1820796504
teacher frustrated no one in beginner yoga class can focus chakras into energy blast
1
en
84
https://local.theonion.com/parents-baby-godmother-all-uncomfortable-with-arrange-1819592287
parents, baby, godmother all uncomfortable with arrangement
1
en
59
https://local.theonion.com/area-woman-slams-down-phone-waits-for-it-to-ring-1819566465
area woman slams down phone, waits for it to ring
1
en
49
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/britney-spears-glaad-award_us_5a82175ee4b00ecc923d3b6e
britney spears to receive prestigious honor for her lgbtq community support
0
en
75
https://www.theonion.com/law-abiding-citizen-keeps-herself-on-track-with-weekly-1819577408
law-abiding citizen keeps herself on track with weekly cheat day
1
en
64
https://entertainment.theonion.com/f-scott-fitzgerald-estate-wondering-why-the-hell-ken-b-1819576942
f. scott fitzgerald estate wondering why the hell ken burns hasn't come knocking yet
1
en
84
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/conservatives-urge-facebook-users-to-use-american-flag-filter-to-fight-against-rainbow-pics_us_5593f2ffe4b05fcdf274be3d
conservatives urge facebook users to use american flag filter to fight against rainbow pics
0
en
91
https://politics.theonion.com/ruby-tuesday-waiter-warns-jill-stein-her-green-party-re-1819579683
ruby tuesday waiter warns jill stein her green party response to trump speech disrupting other diners
1
en
101
https://www.theonion.com/stressed-out-sean-hannity-buys-12-little-cabins-in-main-1825478805
stressed-out sean hannity buys 12 little cabins in maine to get away from it all
1
en
80
https://www.theonion.com/new-report-finds-link-between-each-passing-day-jeanett-1823273857
new report finds link between each passing day, jeanette getting more beautiful
1
en
79
https://www.theonion.com/nation-s-sleep-experts-recommend-cutting-down-on-strobe-1821011252
nation's sleep experts recommend cutting down on strobe light before bedtime
1
en
76
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/delaying-retirement_b_7504128.html
this is why so many boomers are delaying retirement
0
en
51
https://sports.theonion.com/lunar-olympic-officials-continue-search-for-missing-pol-1819567905
lunar olympic officials continue search for missing pole vaulter
1
en
64
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-yemen-bernie-sanders-mike-lee_us_5a9719d0e4b07dffeb6f564b
bernie sanders and mike lee want a fight with the saudis. trump's working to stop them.
0
en
87
https://www.theonion.com/boss-thinks-female-employee-might-be-ready-to-handle-jo-1819579937
boss thinks female employee might be ready to handle job she's been doing for past 2 years
1
en
90
https://www.theonion.com/of-course-busy-bartender-doesn-t-mind-taking-picture-of-1819576292
of course busy bartender doesn't mind taking picture of you and your friends
1
en
76
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/do-you-have-to-pay-income_b_5864724.html
do you have to pay income taxes on social security benefits?
0
en
60
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hipster-classifieds-twitter-trend_us_57c2da06e4b0267344506db9
the hilarious hipster classifieds you'll (probably) never see online
0
en
68
https://www.theonion.com/second-grade-music-student-goes-nuts-with-cowbell-1819565101
second-grade music student goes nuts with cowbell
1
en
49
https://www.theonion.com/antarctic-observational-comic-running-out-of-ideas-1819568222
antarctic observational comic running out of ideas
1
en
50
https://entertainment.theonion.com/area-man-takes-metallica-audio-tour-of-art-museum-1819588417
area man takes metallica audio tour of art museum
1
en
49
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/congressman-says-new-york-city-gunman-got-raw-deal_us_55d8bfabe4b0a40aa3ab2d41
congressman says new york city gunman got 'raw deal'
0
en
52
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/isis-massacre-syria_us_569aab51e4b0778f46f99259
activists: isis militants kill over 100 in attack on syrian regime-held area
0
en
76
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kenya-stop-police-brutality_us_573b7ee9e4b0646cbeeb3e7d
the uncertain fate of the man in the police brutality image that shocked kenya
0
en
78
https://www.theonion.com/god-loses-tip-of-finger-in-black-hole-accident-1819579089
god loses tip of finger in black hole accident
1
en
46
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gary-richrath-dead_us_55f78002e4b00e2cd5e7d061
gary richrath, guitarist and songwriter for reo speedwagon, dead at 65
0
en
70
https://www.theonion.com/convict-sentenced-to-generating-80-000-to-100-000-in-1819579734
convict sentenced to generating $80,000 to $100,000 in profits for private prison
1
en
81
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bookworms-this-7-year-old-wrote-an-anthem-just-for-you_us_57a8a483e4b056bad2163943
bookworms, this 7-year-old wrote an anthem just for you
0
en
55
https://www.theonion.com/metallica-board-of-directors-debates-whether-new-riff-w-1819579870
metallica board of directors debates whether new riff will have negative impact on shareholder value
1
en
100
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/big-bird-sabotage-mashup_us_595e4696e4b02e9bdb0ac01d
big bird, beastie boys mashup tells you how to get to sabotage street
0
en
69
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/guided-meditation-funny-video_us_559eb374e4b01c2162a61269
this unorthodox guided meditation might just get you in the habit
0
en
65
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/corpus-christi-texas-drinking-water_us_5852e591e4b0c05ff320116b
this texas city has unsafe water for the 4th time in 2 years
0
en
60
https://politics.theonion.com/roy-moore-refusing-to-withdraw-from-alabama-13-year-old-1820438342
roy moore refusing to withdraw from alabama 13-year-old
1
en
55
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/top-10-reasons-im-glad-i-grew-up-without-facebook_us_57ae7e25e4b03d06fe84e04a
top 10 reasons i'm glad i grew up without facebook
0
en
50
https://www.theonion.com/astronomers-celebrate-300th-anniversary-of-discovering-1819577085
astronomers celebrate 300th anniversary of discovering sky
1
en
58
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/katie-ledecky-world-record-swimming-freestyle-1500_us_55bf662ee4b0b23e3ce332c0
katie ledecky, 18-year-old u.s. swimming sensation, accidentally breaks world record
0
en
84
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/twitter-doesnt-tire-of-knocking-conor-mcgregors-stamina-in-loss_us_59a250b0e4b05710aa5cbe55
twitter doesn't tire of knocking conor mcgregor's stamina
0
en
57
https://www.theonion.com/historical-archives-immoral-woodcut-discovered-in-hay-1819570245
historical archives: immoral woodcut discovered in hay loft
1
en
59
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hero-drivers-rescue-two-dogs-running-on-freeway-california_us_56a79ac6e4b01a3ed123dc86
watch heroic drivers rescue 2 scared dogs dashing down freeway
0
en
62
https://www.theonion.com/officials-investigating-hugh-hefner-s-death-suspect-for-1819580350
officials investigating hugh hefner's death suspect foreplay
1
en
60
https://entertainment.theonion.com/completely-unrealistic-tv-character-has-complex-multif-1819575573
completely unrealistic tv character has complex, multifaceted personality
1
en
73
https://entertainment.theonion.com/new-bin-laden-tape-contains-three-previously-unreleased-1819566331
new bin laden tape contains three previously unreleased monologues
1
en
66
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chinas-sexiest-panda-new-record_n_7017260.html
china's sexiest panda obliterates own record in latest sex romp
0
en
63
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/women-in-business-qa-laur_b_7060818.html
women in business q&a: laura tenison, founder and managing director, jojo maman bébé
0
en
84
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sir-mix-a-lot-baby-got-back_n_5924046.html
sir mix-a-lot wasn't trying to speak for women with 'baby got back'
0
en
67
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/naked-man-subway_n_6129020.html
naked man sleeps and drinks whiskey on subway (nsfw)
0
en
52
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/patton-oswalt-netflix-talking-for-clapping_us_5717bf76e4b0479c59d6b7fe
patton oswalt wants you to know 'you're a f**king child' if you don't vote because you hate hillary
0
en
99
https://www.theonion.com/ball-park-franks-introduces-new-foot-wide-hotdogs-1819589527
ball park franks introduces new foot-wide hotdogs
1
en
49
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ariana-grande-apology-video_us_559f3ec2e4b05b1d02901529
ariana grande issues 'donut fiasco' apology video that doesn't explain donut-licking
0
en
84
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bergdahl-trump-comments_us_59f75ee6e4b0c0c8e67b5aa4
army judge rules trump comments have not influenced bergdahl case
0
en
65
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-chew-co-host-wants-her-kids-to-know-moms-can-be-more-than-mothers_us_5980b1dae4b08e1430061583
'the chew' co-host wants her kids to know moms can be more than mothers
0
en
71
https://entertainment.theonion.com/al-qaeda-marching-band-to-join-macys-parade-after-incre-1819571921
al-qaeda marching band to join macy's parade after incredible audition
1
en
70
https://www.theonion.com/pier-1-issues-formal-apology-for-rattan-death-march-1819586573
pier 1 issues formal apology for rattan death march
1
en
51
https://www.theonion.com/indian-sweatshop-worker-has-to-work-in-the-fucking-dark-1819573713
indian sweatshop worker has to work in the fucking dark now too
1
en
63
https://local.theonion.com/woman-in-ninth-year-of-letting-boyfriend-down-easy-1819573306
woman in ninth year of letting boyfriend down easy
1
en
50