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7,601
Do you ever just wanna lose your shit on someone for no good reason other than the fact that they exist? Cause same
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7,602
Well it's a mystery to me too https://t.co/PDMgmgL8DB
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[]
7,603
When you're daydreaming about the dick you're gonna get later https://t.co/J7N9GWdakh
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7,604
I can find humor and a silver lining in any situation, that's why I live an amazing life... You should try it
0OK
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7,605
You don't have haters, people just hate you, dumb dumb
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[]
7,606
When she knows just what to get you for Father's Day... https://t.co/tCBhkfCkT9
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7,607
Me- cusses out person for driving the wrong way in a parking lot Also me- drives wrong way in a parking lot
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[]
7,608
Me when people take a post too seriously and I'm reading their butt hurt comments https://t.co/D6HrPpScxp
0OK
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[]
7,609
When your best friend gets out of that relationship and you finally have your hoe'ing partner back https://t.co/r7INj9LPsG
0OK
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7,610
I hate it when people say they're never gonna talk to me again... And then they do...
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7,611
The 'I cheat on his ass' starter app https://t.co/k5gHJKlAjT
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7,612
People that force me to be brutally honest to their face are the best... Like yo you did this to yourself, fam
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7,613
'You're the only one I'm talking to' https://t.co/Q6TLGRberM
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7,614
When you send nudes in public knowing people can see cause you know your shit is A1
0OK
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7,615
RT @SantinaDiMaggio: You don't need to explain your happiness to anyone.
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7,616
My rotation is like a revolving door
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[]
7,617
When you're on a first date and they're already too clingy and touchy feely https://t.co/A5eReObkAr
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7,618
When you do finally give up and start buying them cats at least you won't have to drink alone, loser https://t.co/tcC03fZvSm
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7,619
If I invite you over to take shots, this is what you can expect https://t.co/6foauUxkY0
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7,620
If you really wanna know what someone you're fucking thinks about you, make them show you how you're stored in their phone...
0OK
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7,621
'Oh you're dating someone now?' https://t.co/5HjdmkXori
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7,622
When I send girls the videos we made https://t.co/azjiaa2Ts2
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7,623
When bae gives you a warm welcome home https://t.co/uBbuiBR7Qd
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7,624
Pro Tip- Never go down on someone that has food poisoning
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7,625
Shoutout to Rihanna for writing my theme song 'Sex With Me'
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7,626
'How do you live with yourself?' https://t.co/gdY4lPtVI5
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7,627
Life's too short to be giving people second chances
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7,628
How I feel when I'm drunk at the bar buying everyone shots https://t.co/Opm6ccZylT
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7,629
Shoutout to me for making the worst decision of my life πŸ™ŒπŸΌ
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7,630
I wonder who the first person to think of a sewage system was... I mean there must have been shit everywhere
0OK
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7,631
When your friend owes you money and they're taking a little too long to pay you back https://t.co/wReKiIdH0c
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7,632
When you're at the point of drinking just to stay awake but then you blackout and pass out during sex anyway
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7,633
Ego's bruise harder than any belt ever could
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7,634
He just kept screaming 'is it too late now to say sorrrrry?!' https://t.co/6XU2qMmkuZ
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7,635
Your hoes vs my hoes https://t.co/H6Xe6jQY6u
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7,636
Me- refuses to answer anyone's phone calls Also me- infuriated when people don't answer my phone calls
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7,637
Same. We really are soulmates... Dumb AF but soulmates nonetheless πŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒπŸ™ƒ https://t.co/ZwXTny02jj
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7,638
I don't run from my problems, I laugh at them and act like they don't exists like a normal human being
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7,639
I'm unfollowing, I don't need this kind of negativity in my life https://t.co/bgdVSrGilU
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7,640
My whole life is one big sexual innuendo
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7,641
When your phone goes dry for more than 2 1/2 minutes https://t.co/SY8xAFCtUU
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7,642
When you finally lose all respect for someone so you decide to fuck them and ruin their life just for fun lol
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7,643
Idk why people tell me their problems... All I do is repeatedly ask 'why' like a 4 year old that's not getting his way... Then I laugh
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7,644
@queensoverbitch 😭😭😭😭😭
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7,645
@queensoverbitch I like Twitter cause we're so irrelevant here that no one pays attention to us πŸ˜«πŸ˜‚
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7,646
Merica AF πŸ’ͺ🏼 https://t.co/4AQOWUssSq
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7,647
Me flirting- So tell me about your father...
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7,648
Me flirting- Tell me about your father... Start at the part when he left... https://t.co/xRWJiz0gKU
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7,649
Shoutout to me for being fucking AWESOME
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7,650
Me trying to flirt- Hey cum dumpster, wanna fuck?
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7,651
Anytime someone snapchat calls me I assume it was an accident... Cause as a human being you should know that's not what phones are for
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7,652
When your Mexican friend texts you 'viva la Mexico' on the 4th of July https://t.co/cH6Jrqmx2K
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7,653
Wearing extensions around me is as dumb as wearing panties around me... They both getting ripped off of you
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7,654
Shoutout to everyone accidentally blowing fingers off on video today so we can all have a good laugh tomorrow... Y'all patriotic AF
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7,655
When your inner unicorn is showing https://t.co/HY6MK3hMxf
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7,656
When you just stuffed your fucking face and the waiter asks you if you want dessert https://t.co/5XNoVIOZpL
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7,657
When you're on a date with someone that won't stop talking about their ex https://t.co/mKfGcsvUir
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7,658
Pathetic is not attractive
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7,659
RT @Scouse_ma: πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ https://t.co/ueBm0enQzH
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7,660
RT @T_Bonezzz_: My signature move is out of your life.
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7,661
After we've had sex once https://t.co/LpXDbTkLQX
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7,662
And people with ugly faces should wear masks https://t.co/NduTR125v1
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7,663
*cough cough* loser https://t.co/rRDUZpaPbs
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7,664
When you get to the liquor store with 2 minutes till closing and they're locking the door https://t.co/EcPZKhGS9Z
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7,665
When you think you finally found the one, then you find out he cries after he cums https://t.co/YVplrt2C8j
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7,666
Friend- it's been a long time, what have you been up to? Me- https://t.co/uxlGtLRo4A
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7,667
When your pathetic ex finally dies https://t.co/lnIDW2t1x0
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7,668
If you only knew what your name is in my phone. 😈
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7,669
Me- I read this article about it Also me- I really just read the headline and made up the rest
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7,670
Ever been so hungover that your stomach feels like it's eating itself
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0NOT AGGRESSIVE
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7,671
How I feel when I buy a round of shots https://t.co/lrYT4GqRHD
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7,672
@SantinaDiMaggio but seriously, the silver looks sexy AF and like very easy access to give you your birthday spankings 😘
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7,673
@SantinaDiMaggio good girl
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7,674
Do you ever look at certain people and think, if I ever look like that just kill me
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7,675
Do you ever see people in your feed and think 'lol I fucked you'
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7,676
When you're high AF on FaceTime tuning out a friend that ranting and you tap the screen to see when the video is going to be over
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0NOT AGGRESSIVE
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7,677
Mood GO HOME AND GET YA FUCKIN SHINE BOX
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7,678
How to kidnap me https://t.co/Q46Xocec8k
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7,679
Friend- I'm getting married Me- https://t.co/hzRDvjRHJU
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[]
7,680
Don't text these hoes... If you're doing your job right they'll text you when you're needed
0OK
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7,681
Thems the rules https://t.co/wzIxnA6BCA
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7,682
You ever look at someone and think 'yeah Ima fuck you'
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7,683
RT @valentinaveshi: My kind of Pokemon presented by the best: @Yourfuckboy1 https://t.co/lJ68uo0xrG
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7,684
When your selfie game is weak AF https://t.co/Q7lwtaWRxG
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7,685
When his dick game is garbage but his mouth game is fire AF https://t.co/kLB5844oPj
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7,686
Yeah, I text back in a timely manner... I'm about getting laid not playing games
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7,687
When you stick it in the wrong hole on 'accident' https://t.co/KHAxEv48Bb
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7,688
Talent- Meeting up with complete strangers for sex
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7,689
When it goes from 'you gotta wear a condom' to 'just don't cum in me' https://t.co/tA6EvK1vSF
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7,690
Friend- she's cool, you should keep this one around Me- https://t.co/Ii4QYJolR9
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7,691
@themeredith πŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ’€
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7,692
RT @themeredith: 'You know, the thing is...we ate drugs so...' -my basic excuse for not doing things
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7,693
When the gut rot kicks in after a long weekend of drinking https://t.co/DltmhryxtZ
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7,694
When you forget to finish contouring https://t.co/b5z1mqeZU1
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7,695
Sometimes I just wanna crash into psychic reading places and ask them if they saw that coming...
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7,696
When you're leaving the dick appointment and it was fire AF https://t.co/SN59E3Fzya
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7,697
Plastic surgeon- what can I do for you, Khloe? Khloe- just make me less ugly Plastic surgeon- say no more, fam https://t.co/MaCLGFw5Mf
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7,698
@taxo__ @Scouse_ma πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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7,699
I wanna care sometimes, but this 'fuck it, who cares' attitude is too strong
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0NOT AGGRESSIVE
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7,700
Idk how to feel about the tweet that followed this πŸ€” https://t.co/93VeLIGIrR
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