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jfcalvo
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export-testing-271

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train_8100
0pending
c7b105c8-ad8d-4049-a0de-f15c258675f1
I actually prefer Robin Williams in his more serious roles (e.g. Good Will Hunting, The Fisher King, The World According to Garp). These are my favorite Robin Williams movies. But Seize the Day, although well-acted, is one of the worst movies I've ever seen and certainly the worst Robin Williams movie (even worse than ...
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train_8101
0pending
516395ab-0369-4987-bb9f-81d5eb400e80
The long list of "big" names in this flick (including the ubiquitous John Mills) didn't bowl me over to the extent that I couldn't judge the film on its actual merits. It is FULL of stereotypes, caricatures, and standard, set scenes, from the humble air-ace hero to the loud-mouthed yank flyer. The music track was such ...
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train_8102
0pending
8c26a5f4-4436-4eae-b5ca-2d3da0e5ae78
THE TOY BOX (1971) BOMB<br /><br />Sure, I like looking at nude women. While I prefer hardcore porn flicks, I'll take softcore exploitation grindhouse junk like this too under the right circumstances. Well, these aren't the right circumstances. These aren't ANY circumstances. There's supposed to be a horrific subplot l...
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train_8103
0pending
6ee179a8-eb92-45da-b773-8f8eac6b6c5c
"Don't Drink the Water" is an unbelievably bad film. It's based on a 1966 Broadway play by Woody Allen. It stars Jackie Gleason, the comic genius behind "The Honeymooners". The director, Howard Morris, has appeared in several Mel Brooks comedies (Life Stinks, High Anxiety, Silent Movie)and has made a mark in animation ...
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train_8104
0pending
53f5bf8f-d1f1-4dd5-afcd-8dc86b8ab6d1
Leslie Sands' stilted play "Deadlock" becomes a poor-choice vehicle for Bette Davis and Gary Merrill, just after their joint-success in "All About Eve". After killing her spouse, a scheming woman is visited by her husband's best friend, who passes himself off as her husband once others begin stopping by the house. Irvi...
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train_8105
0pending
f24e5304-0047-4f49-8ebe-d2b1ed8a237f
If you want an undemanding and reasonably amusing hour or so, then it's OK to watch this. It's not all that bad, really. Yeah, it's got more lapses in logic than I care to describe here and might tax the patience of people - like myself, I have to admit - who are inclined to throw things at the TV on occasion, but it's...
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train_8106
0pending
47b108c2-1287-4291-8b4c-8e014f03376c
What an absolute pile of pants. Having read Chris Brookmyre's books religiously since I came across "Quite Ugly...", I was delighted to find out that this drama had been commissioned.<br /><br />I obviously had too much faith. <br /><br />Nesbitt is probably the best thing in this show - and even he doesn't quite fit. ...
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train_8107
0pending
e065d0d9-ef6e-4670-91da-0dc026ff224c
Did I miss something here? This "adaptation" has everything that Brookmyres first novel had. Everything apart from the story, the laughs, the black humour, the political intrigue, the characterisations, the plot, and some semblance of sense.<br /><br />Spoilers;<br /><br />Godamnawful, from beginning to end. They made ...
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train_8108
0pending
4f798861-4d07-4574-88c5-44fb01d9ae54
This movie was a confusing piece of garbage. You never knew what was going on. The characters were poorly written and for the most part they were totally unsympathetic except for Gus (played masterfully by George Eads). I hate this movie but compared to others (Dark Harvest, Dracula's Curse) it should have won an acade...
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train_8109
0pending
014922dc-ce47-40fb-8d22-4a621acbc311
1st watched 11/7/2002 - 2 out of 10(Dir-John Bianco): Pretty lame gangster movie about a Godfather-like family in Brooklyn who like to say four-letter words a lot and kill people. The only thing of interest here was their attempt to show the feds being a lot like the gang. This is the only attempt at good film-making. ...
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train_8110
0pending
4de0ac16-138a-4b48-9b0c-90f4f0b87852
This film is so bad I can't believe it was actually shot. People who voted 10 or 9, 8 and even 7, are you insane? Did we really watch the same movie? Or the same sh** should I say. Everything is bad in this film. The story (is there a story?) is going nowhere, completely incoherent, the acting (some dialogs are simply ...
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train_8111
0pending
07cdd333-a2e0-4bb6-bfc4-34686fe1fa67
I just saw this at the 2006 Vancouver international film festival. The synopsis in the festival guide sounded pretty good so we decided to check this one out. I'm sorry to say I was very disappointed.<br /><br />Besides being poorly written, it was boring. I won't take away from the actors as there is not much they cou...
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train_8112
0pending
314cc0d5-cb05-4c8a-88b5-e572d2c74048
I had the distinct displeasure of seeing this movie at the 2006 Vancouver International Film Festival. I have been attending this festival for over 5 years, and I have certainly seen some poor movies on occasion. However, 'First Bite' has reached a brand new low in film. In spite of being shot in beautiful locations, w...
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train_8113
0pending
4b05f4ef-8aa2-4c73-908f-7c836a90aefa
After being bitten by a bat in a cave,a doctor named John Beck undergoes an accelerating transformation into a man-bat creature.His wife assures him that there's nothing wrong with him,it's all just due to rabies or the anti-rabies drugs he's taking.The local cop thinks that John is responsible for several gruesome mur...
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train_8114
0pending
79f9002d-0aa6-4090-8d59-4afec19b8ee6
Watching It Lives By Night makes you wonder, just who in the world greenlit this crap. A newlywed couple go spelunking on their honeymoon, get attacked by bats and the husband starts to run around in his pajamas attacking various people. And where exactly are they? They're in the desert, then they're skiing, then they'...
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train_8115
0pending
740fbbd1-f9da-4524-bcdc-3b9abcebcf61
I saw this movie on mystery science theater when it was called "It lives by night". That title is much less misleading than "Batpeople". In fact it would more accurately be called Batperson. This movie is about a doctor who studies bats I am thinking because he wants to make a better cure for rabies. This is not really...
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train_8116
0pending
c8658b1e-659b-4f5e-9159-7d77c04bc777
Or maybe that's what it feels like. Anyway, "The Bat People" is about as flat as a rug, bland as a sack of flour and as exciting as a rock...and as intelligent as all three combined.<br /><br />Okay, plot in a nutshell (fitting vessel, that...): a doctor (Moss) gets bitten by a bat while checking out a cave with his wi...
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train_8117
0pending
f430c7c0-402c-4108-8118-c3201aefbfa9
"The Bat People" is a proud resident of the IMDb Bottom 100. Every once and a while the movie suddenly vanishes from the infamous list, depending on whether there are new movies with Paris Hilton in the lead or documentaries about American Idol stars, but it always reliably returns sooner or later. And why? Because, un...
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train_8118
0pending
ca4f68b3-a252-4b68-a025-af485dbfd7ae
Stewart Moss stars as a scientist who is on a working trip with his wife, and one gets the feeling that he was picked for this role for his ability to roll his eyes back in his head...imagine the auditions for this.."can you...no, that's not quite it, thank you, next!". Anyway, he's bitten by a bat, and then, he's eith...
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train_8119
0pending
3bc70e7a-4dd1-44f6-a49a-ff2d6259035f
Ok,so.....guy gets bitten by a bat and then turns into a bat (well,sorta). I can only assume this made sense to SOMEONE at the time! Aren't bats supposed to fly, use radar, and eat bugs instead of attacking humans tho?
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train_8120
0pending
304c49ac-6c06-4b79-b3b9-66a623deb9ef
This movie promised bat people. It didn't deliver. There was a guy who got bit by a bat, but what was with the seizures? And the stupid transformation? Where was the plot? Where was the acting? Who came up with the idea to make this? Why was it allowed to be made? Why? Why? I guess we'll never know.
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train_8121
0pending
e00ce006-4bd7-409d-9d4b-3fa7148e70bc
A man wakes from a nightmare about bats. He and his wife go out into the desert for a picnic on their honeymoon. He seems to hear a strange noise, and she is disturbed by the sight of a bat crawling across their picnic blanket. He wants to go on a tour of a cave, which has something to do with some kind of work he is d...
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train_8122
0pending
28888510-1826-4d60-932c-1486a1b52269
The movie is just as fun as staring at the sun.Sheriff Pataki is a total retard that loves nothing better to do than sit on his fat rear making a smoke ring from his puffy cigars and drinking booze while the doctor acts like a zombie version of Nicholas Cage sucking up all that so called "Blood" which in reality seemed...
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train_8123
0pending
6de99cc3-99ed-4a4c-8bcf-dc31f90c4473
Really, the use of stock nature documentary of swarming bats employed by THE BAT PEOPLE is some of the most effective ever. There are shots of teeming bats hanging from the ceilings of caves, swarming bats flying out of caves or swirling about near the mouths of caves. That alone is enough to be unsettling: Imagine all...
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train_8124
0pending
d7e65db2-fb10-4bc3-a271-91da96c11bb0
Unless the title is supposed to be some kind of spoiler for the wife's transformation (the fiends! ruining it for us). Anycase, if this movie wasn't Made-For-TV, it should have been, it's so remarkably low-budget, underscripted, underacted, and hits every 70's cliche except disco. Nobody is likeable, and you could care...
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train_8125
0pending
98cd2cb4-32b4-4c70-8ea4-17415f2e7185
While exploring some caves with his wife, a doctor is bitten by a bat which causes some alarming side effects...<br /><br />Occasionally creepy atmosphere and some decent (though under used) makeup effects don't save this B horror flick from being a sub-par tale of man-becomes-creature. The Bat People aka It Lives By N...
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train_8126
0pending
020ed7bd-ef10-4067-8a13-f28913ddd04e
I dunno sometimes...you try and try and try to be charitable towards all the B thru Z grade movies out there, but once in a while a particular movie just tests your patience until you want to slap everyone involved. "Bat People" (which I saw under the title "It Lives By Night") is just such a movie. You can't watch thi...
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train_8127
0pending
7e3ca569-33f6-4f9e-ad4d-f71820add83d
OK, don't let my summary fool you. This movie SUCKS HARD. But the worst movie ever? This movie was terrible in ways people shouldn't have to rack their brains to describe. But it is in no way worse than Manos: the hands of fate, hobgobblins, horrors of spider island, or a small handful of movies. As a review the movie ...
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train_8128
0pending
b46761b8-ea96-4f65-9260-d93b8331a62d
Currently, this film is listed on IMDb as the 42nd worst film ever made--which is exactly why I rented it from NetFlix. However, I am saddened to report that the film, while bad, is no where near bad enough to merit being in the bottom 100 films ever made list. I have personally seen at least 100 films worse than this ...
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train_8129
0pending
a843c079-c6b4-4d13-8b78-86ed31383bfe
I didn't think this was as absolutely horrible as some people apparently do. It passes as one of those cheesy horror movies you might waste time with in the middle of the night when you can't sleep, although admittedly it's no better quality than that. It's true that the acting isn't great - I thought Marianne McAndrew...
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train_8130
0pending
41d7888d-5898-4917-9df1-c97a55c9c35c
"The Bat People" is a really bad film that deserved the MST3K treatment just as well like that other film "The Creeping Terror."<br /><br />In it, we are in some sort of mountainous terrain full of bats. We see many things happen, like bats flying out and attacking and stuff, station wagon chases, mishaps at the emerge...
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train_8131
0pending
76cd8410-86d7-4b87-9b3c-80eca32cdc6e
The movie that shoots scenes of a scenic caverns tour.<br /><br />Remember no one from this movie except for Michael Pataki who dished out extreme pain as JC in "Five the Hard Way". He's the really annoying sheriff who I did applaud when he practices nightstick on our rabid doctor. Probably the most laughs you will hav...
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train_8132
0pending
cd5313b8-be77-430c-839c-331d1e027ab6
(spoilers)Wow, this is a bad one. I did a double take when watching an old Star Trek episode the other day-it was the one where everyone gets infected with that space sickness and then go a bit nuts-and there was Stewart Moss, a.k.a the unlikable 'hero' of It Lives by Night! He played the first crewmember infected, who...
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train_8133
0pending
2e50d940-9f2d-4dd1-9e9e-5ba174b1989d
Painful to watch, and not entirely for empathy with the struggles of the characters. Two of the main characters, Cynthia the mother and Monica the acknowledged daughter, spend the great bulk of the film pathetically mewling and bitterly bitching respectively. Their characters are so firmly established that their redemp...
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train_8134
0pending
80883220-2ddf-4b90-b5a2-d4780fba0daf
Time is precious. This film isn't. I must learn to ignore critics who rave about small films like Fargo and this complete waste of time.<br /><br />The theater was packed and everyone left with the same reaction: Is this the film the critics are raving about? What a piece of crap!<br /><br />The hook of this film is th...
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train_8135
0pending
aab1a6ea-3e4c-4c8b-aa75-dd5f90150609
At least among those movies with 100 votes or more. Nominated for best screenplay written directly for the screen? Brenda Blethyn nominated for best actress in a leading role?? Nominated for best picture?? I always disagree with many of the Oscar picks, but this movie might very well be the worst movie of all time to b...
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train_8136
0pending
e5a15a31-45e8-429a-a5d8-912f55fe0697
First of all there wasn't really anything in this movie that grabbed me really. It wasn't a bad movie, just another movie where I said "Well, that wasn't anything special" after I'd seen it. There was probably drama and stuff, but it simply didn't grab me, but more seamed semi-dull. As I said in the headline it seamed ...
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train_8137
0pending
fa93d3f8-ca24-4835-9e0c-6e64e8a7fa67
Well, EYEboy, I must say that it pleases me to no end when someone singles me out and tries to make fun of me, especially when it is someone who seems as intelligent as you do. My favorite part of your post was "But no big bang-bang good-guy bad-guy here, kimosabe. Me suggest you stick to movie with lotsa bang bang."<b...
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train_8138
0pending
98619a52-9618-44a7-bf9d-571f8807571b
"Horrible People" ought to be the subtitle of this horrible film. If you want to see ordinary people doing ordinary things, then look out of your window at real life. But if you want to see unpleasant people doing dull things, you'll have to watch this horrible film by Mike Leigh. The characters talk at length, but nev...
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train_8139
0pending
e66e0970-9560-4097-a451-8114b7c7e751
I have seen a lot of movies...this is the first one I ever walked out of the theater on. Don't even bother renting it. This is about as boring a soap opera as one can see...at least you don't have to pay to watch a soap opera, though.
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train_8140
0pending
9c118d90-5683-42ff-b22b-720046931568
This movie was the most horrible movie watching experience i have ever had to endure, and what is worse is the fact that i had to watch it, and didn't have the opportunity to stop it because it was for school! Admittedly, the storyline was decent...but i found the acting terrible! The exception was Marianne Jean-Baptis...
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train_8141
0pending
e43e5aca-6e39-486a-ad20-629beccbf9aa
... mainly because Ju-on 2 boasts an outrageous FORTY minutes' worth of material literally taken straight out of the first Ju-on - and when you consider that the sequel only runs for 76 minutes, that leaves you with 36 original minutes' worth of film. Ho-hum. I found that deeply irritating - as if viewers simply wouldn...
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train_8142
0pending
ba663375-bbdc-4581-89d4-0a01f13c2fc2
POPEYE AND BIG FOOT **; POPEYE'S ENGINE COMPANY **; GETTING POPEYE'S GOAT **1/2<br /><br />I used to lap these up as a kid but, catching an episode of the series comprising three cartoons back-to-back now i.e. several years later (they preceded the theatrical screening of the pirate yarn RAIDERS OF THE SEVEN SEAS [1953...
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train_8143
0pending
6e21edbe-f1ff-440a-a90c-e1fef5c6625f
Hanna-Barbera sucks the life out of another famous property. The violence is watered down, the stories are formulaic, the animation is bad, the music is obnoxious and repetitive, and frankly, the show just isn't funny.<br /><br />At the time, H-B put every one of its series through the same clichéd situations, regardle...
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train_8144
0pending
86f4ea89-3542-49d3-baa6-b62664848ede
Another great movie by Costa-Gavras. It's a great presentation of the situation is Latin America and the US involvement in Latin American politics. The facts might or might not be accurate but it is a fact that the US was deeply involved in coups and support of Latin American dictatorships.<br /><br />Despite this thou...
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train_8145
0pending
01c91ea9-423f-4a4f-9b11-eb6ee52719f3
I think Phillip Kaufman read the cliff's Notes version of the Kundera novel and then set about making this film. Okay, of course it won't have the punch of the original. Kundera's novels are great because of his manipulation of the narrative concept, his ability to step in and out of stories he constructs. This film do...
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train_8146
0pending
206bcc24-5d98-4637-bc2b-ce1689078be4
*** Contains Spoilers ***<br /><br />I did not like this movie at all.<br /><br />I found it amazingly boring and rather superficially made, irrespective of the importance and depth of the proposed themes: given that eventually we have to die, how should we approach life? In a "light" way, like Tomas; in a "heavy" way ...
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train_8147
0pending
ec2f30db-1bcc-4628-b5e5-53a9ae9179e6
After reading the book, which had a lot of meaning for me, the movie didn't give me any of the feeling which the book conveyed. This makes me wonder if Kaufman even liked this book for he successfully made it into something else.Either that or he is simply bad. Most importantly where is the lightness?! From the very fi...
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train_8148
0pending
72d11dc0-ce10-45de-8be7-978ff04ae78b
This film is quite boring. There are snippets of naked flesh tossed around in a lame attempt to keep the viewer awake but they don't succeed.<br /><br />The best thing about the movie is Lena Olin--she does a masterful job handling her character, but Day-Lewis garbles most of his lines.<br /><br />Kaufman clearly had n...
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train_8149
0pending
09eda71d-ac98-40ae-b7ff-fd84507b52b0
Seriously, Why do American and Frech actors pretending to be Czechs need to speak perfect English with a fake Russian accent? I am a man, so i enjoyed the gratuitous nudity--but a soft porn flick would have more of that, and at least wouldn't pretend it's artistic.<br /><br />All the political statements where painfull...
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train_8150
0pending
10095fba-693d-416c-bc14-578ad95ad777
Harsh, yes, but I call 'em like I see 'em.<br /><br />I saw this in the late 80's, and it was truly one of the most awful, boring films I've ever forced myself to watch.<br /><br />Yes, the cinematography is lovely. The Czech settings are truly stunning. The political backdrop is enticing, but unlike similar "historica...
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train_8151
0pending
1045d6f4-61c7-4e97-b3c9-b7c6e0d84652
yeah cheap shot i know, but this movie is a great example of how a collection of signifiers of 'deepness' (political turmoil, love/lust) can be combined haphazardly to great critical acclaim (see also 'american beauty'). kaufman's movie plods along with gratuitous sex scenes interspersed with often painful dialog seque...
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train_8152
0pending
26ae0dc9-c1bb-4680-9158-384a88207b6c
This is possibly one of the worst movies I have ever seen. I don't care what the critics say, it's bad. I think the problem is with Kundera's novel. It's not that it's unfilmable; it's just that like 99% of his work, it's pretentious and overdrawn. He seems to be enamored with himself,his characters come off as navel-g...
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train_8153
0pending
278facd3-601f-4ebf-8cf4-1f36986a1a8d
Oh, I heard so much good about this movie. Went to see it with my best friend (she's female, I'm male). Now please allow me a divergent opinion from the mainstream. After the first couple of dozen "take off your clothes," we both felt a very strange combination of silliness and boredom. We laughed (at it, not with it),...
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train_8154
0pending
f91387cd-63e4-4593-9ccd-5bf76f97a47e
It's frequently said that movies can never equal the original book. Well, in this case, not only the movie is not "as good" as the book, but is an insult to the book. I'd rather see Milan Kundera's novel turned on fire than into this "something," which the director probably calls "adaptation."<br /><br />All the beauti...
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train_8155
0pending
24f418f1-861d-45c3-9793-41a54524cd65
Bonfires of the Vanities is a film drenched in flop sweat. I can recall no film that has tried so hard to be so unrelentingly outrageous, provocative and important, yet failed so consistently across the board. It is like a stand up comic who's not getting laughs, but can't leave the stage. The harder the film tries, th...
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train_8156
0pending
af472e61-98fe-47c8-abea-2c5433d3c70e
This was a great book and the possibilities for a truly great film were definitely there. But the casting decisions completely wrecked the movie. Hanks is a great actor to be sure, but lacks the smarmy, morally ambivalent characteristics needed for the lead role. Jeff Daniels would have been my choice.<br /><br />Putti...
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train_8157
0pending
fac30482-e366-4a26-a9af-5b703da700d6
This is one of the most atrocious rewrites I've ever viewed. If they want to make a movie with a lousy story, they should refrain from giving it a title of a fine book. There is hardly a relation between Wolfe's book and this movie other than the title. I don't mind changes if they help a story flow on screen. At least...
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train_8158
0pending
3f8a3a62-ef1c-43cb-b7f4-d36ce30e92ce
Regarded by many critics as one of the biggest stinkers of all time (certainly the biggest stinker of director Brian De Palma's career).<br /><br />Sherman McCoy (Tom Hanks) is a smug rich boy whose life goes to pieces when he and his lover Maria Ruskin (Melanie Griffith) are involved in a hit-and-run. His story is chr...
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train_8159
0pending
8859b232-bd2a-44f6-b4f4-aba7171668ec
Most book adaptations are bad but this film left out key parts of the storyline and changed the description and some characters. They rewired the storyline and combined scenes and changed the order. They added ridiculous things into it that never happened in the book and would never happen.<br /><br />If i hadn't read ...
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train_8160
0pending
e5bb40fc-5205-4820-a098-a02850d6bfa5
The point of Wolfe's original novel -- indeed the point of the whole story -- is that things take place because of a carefully calculated sense of expediency. The goal is survival within a particular kind of life style. The novel is full of malice. The only relationship that rings emotionally true is that between Sherm...
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train_8161
0pending
ca7c0c4c-758b-4c13-8e97-ad03c07b152a
As someone who has both read the novel and seen the film, I have a different take on why the film was such a flop. First, any comparisons between novel and film are purely superficial. They are two different animals.<br /><br />The novel is probably intended as a satire, but it arrives as a cross between tragedy and po...
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train_8162
0pending
a2712b12-d9e3-4cfc-83e5-41ad05040628
Based on Tom Wolfe's satirical novel that was praised by all (i have not read it yet) Tom Hanks stars as a wall streeter who accidentally kills a black boy while lost in a bad part of NYC Willis stars as the reporter who starts Hanks on his downward spiral.. The characters are very thin and there seems to be no empathy...
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train_8163
0pending
e79a8123-53d6-4d04-9a91-4aafeeae6747
Tom Wolfe's sprawling, brilliantly observed satiric novel of life among New York snobbery gets a glossy look here but is nevertheless not well served. The film suffers not merely from the miscasting of everyman Tom Hanks as an uncaring Yuppie, Kewpie-doll Melanie Griffith as a manipulative southern belle and Bruce Will...
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train_8164
0pending
04c60149-52f5-42c7-becd-2e9ec23f99a5
(This is a review of the later English release by Disney, featuring Alison Lohman, Patrick Stewart, and co.) <br /><br />I really wanted this film to be good. Really, really. I'm a huge fan of Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away, and after seeing all the glowing reviews on this earlier Miyazaki film, I was eager to see...
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train_8165
0pending
95a2734d-87a6-4c46-b3ef-69f8d859a014
I am partly a fan of Miyazaki's work. I say "partly" because most of his films fall into two categories: brilliant, and boring. Sadly this film falls into the later category.<br /><br />This film suffers from the same fundamental problems as Miyazaki's recent film "Howl's Moving Castle". An intriguing premise is set up...
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train_8166
0pending
432fd12b-827f-40e8-86e8-2fa2b305ab64
I don't know what it is about Donald Sutherland's acting style, or vocal style, but he always seems to be acting from behind a massive wad of soggy Kleenex. He's just...I don't know, THICK? Somnambulistic? On meds? Weird.<br /><br />That said, I just saw the flick again for the first time since its original release, an...
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train_8167
0pending
9df65747-c09e-49d1-a232-d4282a6ece52
To make a good movie you either need excellent actors or an excellent director. You need at least one of the two. In this Eye of the Needle we have none.<br /><br />I don't even remember the name of the director. He mustn't have done much in his career. I like very much Donald Sutherland but he absolutely cannot be the...
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train_8168
0pending
aa0bc177-8d22-401b-a030-7714597ea257
The movie lacks credence with the helicopters which didn't exist until the 1950s. But no woman would do what was done here, even a woman before the women's movement of the 60s and 70s. About the only portion of the movie that you could believe in was that Germany would want to know where the landing would be. Ignore fo...
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train_8169
0pending
0c8778a5-038e-4c78-935a-9263ba2c692a
When I had first heard of "Solar Crisis" then got a load of the cast, I wondered why I had never heard of a movie with such a big cast before. Then I saw it.<br /><br />Now I know.<br /><br />For a movie that encompasses outer space, the sun, vast deserts and sprawling metropolises, this is an awfully cramped and claus...
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train_8170
0pending
a95c757b-1ad1-4d9d-8d49-f84f8e8f83c0
Oh the hilarity! Oh the joy! Another film that is so bad it's good! Or, so I thought. In actual fact, this one misses the "so bad its good" phase and goes, sadly, straight to the "could have been so bad its good, but they screwed it up and made it plain bad".<br /><br />For a start its way too long. Cut half an hour an...
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train_8171
0pending
4d462c4b-606c-4e67-a0a6-9b9ab4b98161
I picked this title up from a friend who had it sitting in his exhaustive DVD/Video/Laserdisc collection, so luckily I didn't personally have to pay for it. I had an inkling that it would be a bad film, but I KNOW what a truly bad film is after watching greats like Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things and The Incre...
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train_8172
0pending
b62ee6cf-18a8-4368-b1db-afd7c139ae21
Disowned by Richard C. Sarafian, this disaster stunk up Japanese theaters before coming to the States and going immediately to video, where it was not seen again until the Turner networks needed something other than infomercials to fill their 3am-6am time slots and found this tape at the bottom of their bin. The Smithe...
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train_8173
0pending
5a641731-b1bd-4b86-a58e-4b389ee39e11
It was one of those late night "It's there" I saw it things. Sometimes they are great. This one was awful, but it really shouldn't have been.<br /><br />The movie had a really good cast. How can you fail when you have Charlsten Heston and Jack Pallance? We're talking Oscar winner turf here. It had good special effects....
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train_8174
0pending
8042f186-6815-4456-983d-635ff6aa0118
One of the requirements of science fiction, at least before it starts to become satire, is that it be somewhat plausible. I would think that an anti-matter bomb would do considerably more damage than for what it was intended. But I'll leave that to the physicists who might have seen Solar Crisis.<br /><br />It is a cri...
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train_8175
0pending
bad97651-65b1-4ee7-a5b7-06a1c1c23e26
I had high hopes for this film, since it has Charlton Heston and Jack Palance. But those hopes came crashing to earth in the first 20 minutes or so. Palance was ridiculous. Not even Heston's acting or Annabel Schofield's beauty (or brief nude scenes) could save this film. Some of the space effects were quite good, but ...
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train_8176
0pending
875ceb67-65f5-4fa2-8937-b15c04cbb966
Yet another movie with an interesting premise and some wondrous special effects falling right into the trash can.<br /><br />Boring direction and performances (with the exception of the lovely Annabel Schofield who is much cuter as a brunette and probably deserves better material, and the ever earnest Charlton Heston) ...
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train_8177
0pending
e49626d5-dcd1-42cf-994b-501dd27cf46b
The world is facing imminent destruction and a suicide mission is sent to the Sun to avert catastrophe by firing a bomb into its fiery heart: yes, it's Solar Crisis, aka Crisis 2050, which burned up a huge chunk of change that's never apparent on screen back in 1990 and returned barely enough to buy a Happy Meal for ea...
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train_8178
0pending
c0cea3cd-165f-41b3-ba75-431884876b2c
I saw this movie a long time ago... luckily it was for free. I have to be one of the maybe twenty people who saw this movie in the theater. I don't remember a whole bunch of it, but I do remember I was incredibly bored, the plot made no sense and when I came out of the theater the only thing I could say was at least no...
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train_8179
0pending
b24e35bd-a38d-4088-8563-3b321c494889
This su*k! Why do they have to make movies that they must know su*k from the beginning? I mean, look at Alien from 1977. If the movie you´r about to make is not better than anything made billions of years before, why make it? I had problems with the plot and who the main character was. That's not good either.
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train_8180
0pending
876aa2fd-c1c2-4fc2-babe-d482ca296a91
Final Score: 1.8 (out of 10)<br /><br />After seeing 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back' I must have been on a big Eliza Dushku kick when I rented this movie. 'Soul Survivors' is a junk "psychological thriller" dressed up like a trashy teen slasher flick - even to the point of having a masked killer stalk a cast of young ...
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train_8181
0pending
8ac9ca0d-d38e-457f-a16d-b0282cb48b8f
Like a relative that gives you a bad gift, Soul Survivors has its heart in the right place but trips up with a bad execution. Stephen Carpenter's writing/directing effort borrows freely from other, better films, such as Jacob's Ladder and Abre Los Ojos (Open Your Eyes). For those who haven't seen either of these films,...
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train_8182
0pending
241b2963-eb6f-4afe-9811-9452e471c54a
If the writer/director is reading this (and I imagine you are since you should now be out of work) then I must tell you - I have seen some bad movies in my time but this one gets the distinction of having the worst premise I've ever heard.<br /><br />SPOILERS - Nothing happens! <br /><br />A total waste of time. I laug...
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train_8183
0pending
52794398-8da5-45ab-b59f-da5a039e6427
(A possible spoiler or two) <br /><br /> "Soul Survivors" is quite possibly the worst theatrical released movie ever. Nothing makes sense at all, there's some plot about a girl who has strange visions of people who may or may not be dead. The entire movie is just a bunch of random shots of things that don't really tie ...
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train_8184
0pending
c15afd78-7cdb-49d3-9bd7-0e4f42e8949d
I wanted to watch this movie because of Eliza Dushku, but she only has a smaller part in it, and her character isn't very likable. However, the main character, played by Melissa Sagemiller, is extremely beautiful and a perfect delight to look at throughout the movie. This is really nothing but a showcase for her looks ...
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train_8185
0pending
2bc206ac-7a92-42cf-8301-4a5e1e046e56
This is not a very good movie, but it's not a stinker either. It is very confusing and unnecessarily long so rent it at your own risk.<br /><br />My GF and I have figured this movie out (we think) so here it is:<br /><br />***MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW***<br /><br />Firstly, this movie is actually quite simple after you remo...
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train_8186
0pending
642d6b92-ef10-4529-b48b-ecf63f49019d
An incoherent mess with a gratingly deafening sound track, "Soul Survivors" is the latest entry in the "who's dead and who's alive" genre of horror films. Two teenaged couples, Sean and Cassie and Matt and Annabel, prepare to go off to different colleges, but before they part until Thanksgiving Break, they attend one l...
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train_8187
0pending
77299abe-d307-4c67-b11e-ea3fb93b8a95
I didn't have HUGE expectations for this film when renting it for $1 at the video store, but the box at least showed a little promise with its "killer cut" of "more gore! more sex!" Can't go wrong there! Well... needless to say, the box is a fraud. How in the hades did actors and actresses of this caliber sign on for a...
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train_8188
0pending
a033e801-7faa-4b8a-9842-50b6eef27b20
First off let me say that this has to be on the top of my list of boring movies. Nothing, and I mean nothing in this movie is even remotely thrilling. Most of it is very confusing and as it progresses you just wish it would end!! Some people want a movie that makes them "think" through the entire thing, to which I say....
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train_8189
0pending
c08a8437-001d-4cf4-90ac-a99eaba60d92
Melissa Sagemiller,Wes Bentley,Eliza Dushku and Casey Affleck play young students at Middleton College in the town of Middleton.The four teenagers form two love triangles.One night during an ominous full moon they drive and argue along a slippery and twisting mountain road.Not looking properly they careen into another ...
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train_8190
0pending
fe40997f-2679-4abc-bc25-c6c15c2a83f0
Steve Carpenter cannot make horror movies. First of all, the casting was very wrong for this movie. The only decent part was the hot brown haired girl from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This movies has no gore(usually a key ingredient to a horror movie), no action, no acting, and no suspense(also a key ingredient). Wes Ben...
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train_8191
0pending
0156b5cd-33e8-40a1-9d45-7c35aa6ce8ea
...had I watched it in my teenage years. This movie was mildly entertaining. What I liked about Soul Survivors were the gothic atmosphere during the party scenes, and the constant flips between 'dream' and 'reality.<br /><br />Had there not been movies like 'The 6th Sense' and 'Don't Look Now' I would have been surpris...
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train_8192
0pending
50e1f252-3140-4a64-9eb8-a75859e18fb0
Quite unimpressive. The 'twists' are all pretty predictable, if you've seen any movies within the last ten years, and the few somewhat interesting parts (wherein someone utilizes context clues to make a decision) are few and lack much punch, since the 'secret' has already been shown before these clues are explained.<br...
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train_8193
0pending
c7e68ac6-ec8a-4466-8be6-4b1f349af896
I have seen already fantastic stories, but the premises of this one are so unbelievable that it comes very close to being ridiculous. A rich and young guy undergoes a heart transplant the day after his marriage, and he is somehow witnessing his own surgery and the plot of his surgeons to kill him. Even if there is a me...
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train_8194
0pending
e4b2e0cf-0eba-466b-9f3a-a740df745a71
For a film about a killer this is surprisingly dull.<br /><br />Nothing much happens and even when things do happen they don't generate any real excitement or interest.<br /><br />The acting is good from the two leads, Cassetti in particular delivers a great performance combining the certainty and stupidity of Succo bu...
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train_8195
0pending
33c2d543-0587-4bac-97f1-b90f3d6e5ca5
Cedric Kahn's films have been character-based, rather than action-based (I'm thinking of L'Ennui and Feux rouges) so it is jarring to see this series of really expert car chases interspersed with some plodding attempts to give character to Succo. I don't find Stefano Cassetti to be an interesting actor; he reminds me o...
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train_8196
0pending
fda9290c-3dab-4ba6-8805-7e8b21770dcf
What a wasted opportunity to actually make an interesting film about a complicated subject. There is very little exploration about what it really feels like to be a straight (or gay) man working in a gay sexual environment.The dancers keep talking about their art as if it has no erotic component. They may not all be pr...
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train_8197
0pending
8853f8fb-bc84-4b63-801d-e469bdb25313
I saw Chan Is Missing when it first came out, about four years after moving from San Francisco to New York. Maybe it was the perspective of a few years away, but this movie seemed to capture the essence of the city and its people better than anything else I'd ever seen (still does). It concentrates on one particular co...
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train_8198
0pending
b3b2bd73-23de-4c01-afab-5fede2787f88
I watched this on a whim because it was available and I'd heard the Thumb movies were funny. This one was not. The majority of the jokes were based around "Geranium's" physique and, in turn, Kate Winslet's. I think it's really pathetic of the the "Thumbtanic" creators to stoop so low to make jabs at a respected actress...
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train_8199
0pending
feb64a2f-926d-4f1c-bd79-e5a1acf398eb
The Thumb idea isn't such a winner the second time round. ThumbTanic wasn't as good as Thumb Wars for a number of reasons. Primarily, I think, Mr Oedekerk had far less to work with in the Titanic send-up. Unlike Star Wars, the movie Titanic hasn't (yet?) become a cultural myth and there are far fewer references to be m...
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