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how will you feel about me then ? '' | [
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victoria started shivering . | [
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it was the moment of truth and she was n't sure if she was up to it . | [
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`` i do n't know . | [
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i 'm still waiting to start hating you again . '' | [
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dharr laughed softly . | [
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`` would it help if you knew that i do n't want to make you hate me ? '' | [
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he said . | [
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pulling her hair off to one side , he let his fingers feel the softness . | [
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`` in fact , i do n't think i 've been able to actually live without you for the past five years , '' he admitted . | [
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victoria could feel his heart beat accelerate and turned to look at him . | [
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`` why did you leave me like that ? '' | [
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she asked , wishing she could stop the hurt in her voice but it was still too raw , especially after last night . | [
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`` why did you say those things to me ? '' | [
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dharr sighed and sat up , pulling her with him but not letting her move away . | [
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he tucked the pillows behind his back and looked down at her lovely , pain filled eyes . | [
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`` because i was jealous . '' | [
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`` jealous ? | [
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of what ? | [
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or who ? '' | [
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`` of scott . | [
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that morning , i arrived in london early . | [
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i came to see you and found scott leaving your dorm room , happily enjoying a sandwich and looking like he 'd just fallen out of bed . | [
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i naturally assumed it had been yours . '' | [
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victoria 's mouth dropped open and she looked up into his face . | [
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the laughter started slowly but the more she thought about it , the harder she laughed . | [
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dharr obviously did n't appreciate the humor but he did n't pull away . | [
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in fact , he only waited until her laughter died away before raising one eyebrow in inquiry . | [
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`` would you care to share the joke ? '' | [
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he asked . | [
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victoria nodded and smiled again , controlling the laughter , but just barely . | [
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`` scott 's gay . '' | [
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she watched the emotions cross his face , running the gamut of disbelief to shock to horror . | [
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`` gay ? '' | [
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he asked in a strangled voice . | [
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`` gay , '' she confirmed . | [
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`` in fact , at the time , he was dating a very nice man named marcus . '' | [
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dharr leaned his head back against the silk covered headboard and closed his eyes . | [
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`` i 'm sorry , '' he said , pulling her closer . | [
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`` i 'm so sorry , '' he said again and buried his face in her neck . | [
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victoria felt all the awful feelings just melt away and she wrapped her arms around his neck , feeling her heart melt with his apology . | [
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`` but why did you ... . '' she swallowed hard before she could continue , `` leave that nasty message this morning ? '' | [
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`` i swear it was n't what you were thinking , '' he said , lifting his head and she could see the sincerity in his eyes . | [
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`` it was a gift to show you how much last night meant to me . | [
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i swear it was nothing more than that . '' | [
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`` oh , dharr ! | [
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i 'm sorry , '' she said and pulled him close . | [
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`` i knew i lo ... '' she stopped just in time . | [
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just because he did n't think nasty , demeaning things , did n't mean he wanted her love . | [
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the words were swallowed quickly and she looked up , trying to decide if she 'd goofed again . | [
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his eyes sharpened on her shocked face and he moved closer , determined to find out what she had been about to say . | [
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`` what were you going to say ? '' | [
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he demanded . | [
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`` that you love me ? '' | [
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he asked . | [
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victoria was going to deny it but she could tell that the dictator had come back . | [
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she was n't going to get around it . | [
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`` yes , '' she said sadly , looking up at the ceiling instead of his handsome face . | [
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`` but i know you do n't want that right now . '' | [
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she started to get out of bed , feeling foolish but he pulled her back , swinging her so she was laying flat against the now rumpled sheets , her hair flying out behind her and dharr towering over her . | [
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`` say it , '' he demanded . | [
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`` why , so you can laugh at me ? '' | [
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she threw back at him . | [
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his eyes softened and he shook his head gently . | [
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`` no . | [
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] | [
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] | [
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so i can tell you how much i love you . | [
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] |
how much i need you in my life and how i have suffered for five long years , thinking you were falling in love and marrying another man because i was too stupid to claim you for my own . '' | [
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with each word , the pain surrounding victoria 's heart melted a little more . | [
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`` you love me ? '' | [
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she asked , her hands coming to touch his handsome face and her eyes filling up with hope . | [
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`` yes . | [
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now will you say it ? '' | [
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he demanded again . | [
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`` i love you ! '' | [
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she cried out , throwing herself into his arms and bringing his face down to hers . | [
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`` i love you , you arrogant man , '' she giggled . | [
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`` and you 're going to marry me and give me lots of children and help me raise arina and bajan , '' he ordered , bending down to kiss her neck . | [
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`` absolutely , '' she agreed . | [
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epilogue dharr closed the file and nodded in the general direction of the men gathered around the table . | [
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`` thank you for your input , gentlemen , '' he said , effectively ending the meeting . | [
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dharr stood up and walked out . | [
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as soon as he passed by his secretary 's desk , he raised an eyebrow in question . | [
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`` in the kitchen your highness , '' the man said , bowing and closing his eyes although he wished he could look up and see the king 's expression . | [
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it was almost comical to see his face when he realized his queen was doing something he disapproved of . | [
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dharr sighed heavily and shook his head . | [
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he walked down the now familiar hallway , reaching the kitchen in short time . | [
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he stopped in the doorway , watching the scene in front of him . | [
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the chefs were off to one side , busily preparing food for the evening meal . | [
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but in one corner , in an area specially created for small beings to cook with low tables and smaller measuring cups , tiny refrigerators and safety blenders , sat his brother 's children as well as his two year old son . | [
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the three of them were staring into a bowl surrounded by a table covered in flour and something he suspected was chocolate but he could never be sure . | [
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then his eyes moved higher to watch his beautiful , hugely pregnant wife waddle out of the storeroom . | [
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she was due to deliver their daughter any day now but still she somehow got her body down to the level of the small table . | [
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`` here you go , '' she was saying . | [
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victoria handed the milk to bajan since it was obviously his turn to put the ingredient into the bowl . | [
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`` daddy ! '' | [
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his son david said and got up out of his chair to throw himself into his father 's arms . | [
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bajan was next and then arina who pushed her body between the more aggressive boys to reach dharr . | [
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he hugged all of them , then let them lead him over to their cooking table . | [
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`` what are you making today ? '' | [
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he asked . | [
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