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How to deal with a boss who always shouts and yells at most members of his team? How to deal with a boss who always shouts and yells at most members of his team? (Except his favourite employees of course who he is very friendly with). We have become very sure that he enjoys intimidating us, and most of us are trying to avoid him and to keep the communication only via email as much as we can. <Q> We have become very sure that he enjoys intimidating us <S> There's your problem. <S> Stop looking scared. <S> It's natural to feel a little uncomfortable, but your team needs to show some strength. <S> Be as stoic looking as possible. <S> Everyone needs to do this. <S> Take a deep breath and relax. <S> When he is done, it is business as usual. <S> Don't try to show him that you're going back to work with extra effort by looking busy trying to solve this problem. <S> Take your time. <S> Don't forget to breathe. <S> Also, make sure to be a little more attentive if he ever manages to address you in a respectful manner and put a little more effort in getting the task done as quickly as possible. <S> Your boss isn't a complete idiot. <S> Your team has shown him that yelling gets results and bosses like getting results. <S> It's up to you to shape his behavior if you ever want it to change. <A> Force a de-escalation. <S> This is done by patterning the behavior you want him to follow. <S> If he raises his voice, do not act frightened, but respond in a calm, soft voice. <S> This demonstrates that you are the one in control. <S> It also has the additional affect of creating a dissonance to those observing. <S> When someone yells, and another cowers, it appears to the observer that the person doing the yelling is justified. <S> However, if the person being yelled at stands their ground assertively, but not aggressively, it appears to the onlooker that the yelling is unnecessary, and the one yelling looks like a fool. <S> Do not try to out-shout him. <S> Remember, the goal is to change his behavior. <S> When you speak softly, people will naturally speak more softly, or even be silent so that they can hear you. <S> A soft voice and relaxed posture is actually a dominant stance. <S> It shuts down a bully very quickly. <S> Yelling back will get you disciplined, cowering reinforces the behavior, but quiet dominance will end it. <S> I have used this <S> and it is very effective. <A> The boss's behaviour as described is clearly out of order - he's a bully, plain and simple. <S> They probably already are aware to some degree but they also need to know it is having a damaging effect on the team. <S> Sadly this approach doesn't always work well. <S> If the boss is the most senior person you have noone to pull rank on him. <S> They may tolerate his behaviour because he's perceived as too valuable to upset or because they too are intimidated by him. <S> Or they may condone it because they are good friends with the boss and of a similar outlook. <S> In any of these cases, you do risk being fired as a result (though if you are fired, it may be a blessing in disguise), and your other options are to leave or put up with it. <S> Putting up with it has the immediate advantage of keeping the pay cheques coming, but is liable to be detrimental to your mental health the longer it continues for, so I wouldn't recommend it.
| As he appears to be showing quite deliberate disrespect for you and selected others, approaching him directly is unlikely to be fruitful. You need to go to either HR (the preferable option) or his own boss and make them aware of the unacceptable behaviour.
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How to answer what my pay was at previous companies I am currently searching for a job, and one company asks what my pay rates were at previous jobs. I don't remember what my pay was. The jobs were internships, and I was more excited about the opportunity to intern than the exact pay I was receiving. I didn't keep my offer letters from those jobs, which I realize now was a bit of a mistake. How should I go about finding out how much I was paid by these companies? One idea I had, and the one I'm currently planning on doing, is: visiting my old employers in person, asking for the HR department, and asking them if they can give me the information I'm looking for (bringing several forms of ID with me, of course). Does that sound reasonable? <Q> Rather than answer the question of <S> "How do I find what my pay was?" , you should be asking <S> "Should I give my previous salary figure to a prospective employer?" <S> That's what you were paid for <S> that job, not this job. <S> You can give them a ballpark figure of your expected salary, but your previous salary is rather irrelevant to your potential employer. <S> Chances are that they're trying to squeeze you on pay, or they have no idea of how much they are up for, which is even worse as they may not have done their costings and may not even have a sufficient budget to cover your salary. <S> There is a vast number of questions about not giving your previous salary to a prospective employer. <S> In particular, this question has some good information you may find useful. <A> Do you still have tax records, bank statements, or online access to the bank account you were using at the time? <S> Asking in person should probably be your last resort. <S> If you don't have any way to reconstruct the data, calling/emailing would almost certainly be a better choice. <A> How should I go about finding out how much I was paid by these companies? <S> You could call, speak to someone in HR or your former boss, and ask. <S> Most likely they will have a record of your start and end dates, as well as what you were paid. <S> Does that sound reasonable? <S> You could do that as well, but it seems like overkill to appear in person. <S> If you run into a wall, and cannot get any record of your pay, just be honest with your potential employer and say "I don't remember".
| Don't ever make up a salary - that's lying and not likely to be an attribute a new employer would prefer. The answer to this question is no, I would decline to give this figure. One idea I had, and the one I'm currently planning on doing, is: visiting my old employers in person, asking for the HR department, and asking them if they can give me the information I'm looking for (bringing several forms of ID with me, of course).
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How do I know if my boss is having me do almost all of the work? So I work in a small, two-person company (in America, Seattle if that helps anyone). Just myself and my boss. We are both (web - full stack) software developers. We share office space with a couple other companies, but don't work with them. I'd say at this point we're at about similar skill levels, though when I started 3 years ago he was substantially more experienced than me. The other day I looked at our commit history and noticed something curious - out of all of the recent commits, I had made about 95% of the recent commits. I decided to dig further today before posting here - for the past 3 or so months, as far as I can tell, my boss has made only a handful of commits. Less than ten separate functions (most of them maybe 3-4 lines of code), a handful of configuration or cosmetic (label changes, or tiny CSS changes). Now, I know that coding isn't necessarily about the number of lines of code you write, but this seems fundamentally different. Now, I don't want to immediately assume anything negative about my boss. He does most of the client-facing interactions and handles the admin aspects of the company (except for payroll and accounting, which he outsources to other companies/individuals). But we only have 2-3 clients right now, and I feel like the admin burden on a two person company has to be fairly low, especially when you've been operating the company for years. I'm not saying he does no work, it just seems like he might be doing very, very little. How do I know if he is contributing his fair share of the labor? How much time does project management for 2-3 long-term clients take? This wouldn't even probably be a problem, except for the fact that he has demanded a good deal of overtime at points from me (60 hours some weeks). To the point of being a work-life balance issue. That, and the cost of the office space - if we're glorified freelancers, then paying for a nice office in a trendy downtown area has to be incredibly expensive relative to the profit the company is making. We haven't had clients to our office in the entire time I've worked there - most of them are from other states. If he isn't contributing any real work, how can I know it? I'm not his boss - I can't just walk up to him and be like, "Hey, I see you haven't made very many commits lately - what the hell are you doing?" Is there some other aspect of a business that might be eating up his time that I'm simply unaware of? What could it possibly be? The real question I want answered is - how do you know if your boss is slacking off? <Q> I think there are multiple issues, and you are paying too much attention to the wrong one. <S> If your working hours and pay were appropriate, it would not matter how much or little your boss was doing. <S> Instead, raise the issues of excessive overtime and insufficient pay for your current experience and productivity. <S> Both would be issues even if your boss was doing more development than you. <S> Too much overtime might be solved, for example, by hiring another developer, just as well as by your boss doing more development. <A> Unless your boss is out of the office most of the time looking for clients, then I would say you are definitely doing all the work <S> and he's living off your sweat. <S> This isn't uncommon even in small companies. <S> The main worry as I see it isn't that you're being used, that's what employees are for. <S> The problem is that your boss is cruising along, so you're not likely to expand, grow, and make a fortune as a company and therefore you won't benefit from being on ground level before it hit the big time.. <A> Your boss determines how much and which part of the work is his versus being delegated. <S> As long as this is not a peer relationship, you don't get a vote on that. <S> Sorry, but the answer to "how do you know your boss is slacking off" in this situation is that, _ by definition, _ <S> he isn't. <S> It's also possible that he is doing work --lining up business, for example-- that you aren't seeing. <S> Beware of assuming thsat because he isn't doing your kind of work he isn't working as hard or harder in ways you have no insight into. <A> You should just ask him about it. <S> He's your boss, yes, but clearly you believe you have leverage in this business relationship. <S> After all, what you're describing looks very normal to me. <S> I've seen many competent workers flounder when they became the boss because they had no one else checking their work anymore. <S> And please, pay no attention to what the others said. <S> By itself, a traditional job title doesn't mean much. <S> In one company I worked for, the sales people were actually making more money and considered themselves more important than the CEO himself. <S> Those salespeople had the leverage. <S> The CEO didn't. <S> Those particular salespeople were irreplaceable, but the CEO and his company were replaceable. <S> If you have leverage, you should ask the tough questions. <S> This kind of discussion is actually very important. <S> Don't let it slide because you dislike confrontations. <A> He is your boss and you are his employee because he started a company and you didn't. <S> You do the hours that you do for the money he pays because he tells you <S> and you do it. <S> There is no reason why this has to be so. <S> You can find a company that pays you more for possibly less work, or you can start your own company, or you can refuse to work more than forty hours a week without being paid overtime.
| It's also quite likely that he is doing other work which isn't part of the company and therefore you don't get a look at and keeping all that revenue himself. If you're not afraid to lose this job, then do not be afraid to ask your boss about his contributions. What really matters is the amount of leverage you can bring to the table.
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How often I can follow-up over verbal job offer In January 2016, I interviewed with a very large company for which I'd very excited about working. After 3 weeks, they interviewed me again and everything looked good. After another 3 weeks, they called me and told me they preparing the papers and I got the job. Then they got quiet. After not hearing anything from them for almost 6 weeks, I followed up. They informed me that I will start with them in July, and I should start planning, as this job include relocation back to my home country. However, this was still only a verbal offer without a written job offer. Ten days ago, I sent an email and called as they previously told me they hoped to finalize the offer last week. I asked when to expect an official job offer and there has been no response to date. I have another offer in hand, but it is not really something that excites me. How should I handle this? Should I resign my current position? Should I continue waiting on this position? Should I accept the other offer and move on? <Q> A verbal offer has no meaning unless it's followed by a written contract shortly afterwards. <S> In your case, the delay has largely expired. <S> They're just wasting your time and playing with you by having you wait for so long. <S> You have nothing in hand so far <S> and it's very likely that this offer will never became real <S> so I would advise you to take the other offer, even if it's not your dream job. <S> It already happened me a couple of times in which my manager told me " <S> yeah, we are going to renew your contract" <S> (one time even he gave his word for it), with nothing in writing. <S> To imagine how it ended is left as an exercise to the reader. <A> There are a couple of reasons why they respond that way: <S> They are too busy . <S> They are waiting for an opportunity . <S> In my previous company, we decided we would need to hire a new developer should we be awarded a project. <S> We expected win the project within a week, so we began interviewing candidates. <S> I feel bad for the candidates when we were told the project would be postponed two weeks, since we cannot give them an offer until we sign the contract for the new project, we had to make the candidates wait. <S> There are internal obstacles . <S> For example, the department wishes to hire you, but they need to apply funding from their superiors. <S> The request had not been smooth, but they still wish to keep you around in case they have good news. <S> Either way, I would have looked elsewhere by this time already if I were you. <S> Life is short! <S> If they take this long to give you an offer, how long do you think it would take them to give you a new computer, fix the printer, or a new desk? <S> Another 6 months? <S> There are some people who just like to delay things, make others wait for them and waste everyone's time (God knows why), sounds like they are one of them. <S> It also means you are not attractive to them. <S> When I look for a job, I want somebody who is in desperate need of me. <S> It gives me the leverage to negotiate better salary and better offers! <S> You guys still thinking about whether to hire me? <S> Sorry, I've gone somewhere else <S> (-; <S> Seriously, look somewhere else, and forget them even if they get back to you later! <A> A verbal offer is worth the paper it is written on. <S> Move forwards and get on with your career, following up with no reply means that you can't cash in that non existent paper. <S> So just leave the next step if any to them.
| They want to hire you, but the workload of their normal duties have grown to a point where it is really hard to spare time on your case.
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Given 3 options to stay. Later one taken away I have been an intern at a reputable start up since January. I was in the QA section of this company since I joined. My internship was to last for six months, that is, till end of June. I also have an offer from this same company for full time employment in the same position where I work now. In these five to six months, I realized that QA isn't meant for me. I find the it extremely boring and I am not satisfied for a number of reasons, Programming has always been my passion and strength, I want a job that will let me do this(Before joining I was told I would be programming here.) In these months of my internship I have hardly been challenged and required to think. It is a very monotonous job. So, in April I went ahead and put these in front of my manager. I also told him that if I do not get what I am interested in, I might consider leaving the company(I believe in being honest. It helps both sides plan better.). He was a very understanding person and told me that I could interview with the Development team there. In a week, I had two interviews. After another week I was told that I now have three options and we discussed in detail each of them, Stay in the current position and they will make sure that I get to do programming. Move to the QA-Automation team(I am told I will be doing lots of programming here) Move to the Development team He told me that he doesn't want me to consider moving out of the company. After this, I told him that I wouldn't move out of the company and would surely take one of these options. I was given another week to decide. I decided to move to the Development team.I told this to my manager. He again tried to tell me the advantages and disadvantages of my choice and told me to take another week to make the decision. He did seem to favor QA-Automation over development. A couple of days earlier I ran into the Development manager who interviewed me for the development role. He said that they have given out all the offers this time and that I can not move to development because their head count is too high this time. I definitely do not want to stay in my current position. I do not want to move to Automation either because I have developed an aversion towards QA and don't ever in my life want to work in a QA team. Also, many of my colleagues started off in QA-Automation but ended up here. I do not want this to happen with me. I do not want to be in a QA team. Would it be right if I chose to leave now ? How do I tell my manager that I do not want to take up QA-Automation even if it offers programming right now because I am scared I will be stuck up here for rest of my career ? <Q> You can always choose to leave at any time, although seeing as your 6 months of internship are almost up, it would be best to stay until the time originally agreed (although you are not obligated to do so). <S> It seems you got good value out of your internship. <S> The purpose is for you to learn something about your field and how it works in the real world, and the company gets some low level slave labor and pre-screening of a possible junior employee. <S> You've learned you don't like QA, and they got the slave labor and a look at you. <S> You don't own them anything, and they don't owe you anything beyond of course paying you for whatever time you spent working there. <S> During any internship, you should be seriously looking at all your employment options. <S> That of course includes the company you are interning at, but should never be limited just to that. <S> You've been negligent in looking at other options, so you need to get on that right away and seriously. <S> This is whether that next job is at the company you're currently at or not. <S> Get your resume out there! <S> Now! <S> You've already waited too long. <A> For a start - Is having no job a good idea? <S> Even if it is working in automation. <S> You never know it might work out well. <S> So if I was you I would plump for the automation role. <S> Give it six months. <S> If it does not work look for anther job in another company. <S> PS: Careers do not last forever - they can be changed. <A> Would it be right if I chose to leave now ? <S> Yes, changing your mind about automation is perfectly fine. <S> I assume this means you will leave at the original date you were planning to leave in June. <S> How do I tell my manager that I do not want to take up QA-Automation even if it offers programming right now because I am scared I will be stuck up here for rest of my career? <S> Your reasoning is sound. <S> Tell him the truth. <S> Conversations like that are not easy. <S> If they knew about your intention early on and they still hired people to go into the development team instead of you, then don't think that's going to change later on. <S> That being said, I have no idea if that's the case or not. <S> You didn't give those details. <S> But even if that's not the case, you're correct in thinking that accepting the automation job could get you stuck in that type of job for the next couple of years. <S> Definitely, do not go on the promises of your immediate manager alone, but if he wants to bring in the manager of the development team on this discussion, and perhaps if both those managers were willing to give you development work for 30% of the time until the end of June -- that might be a good compromise. <S> And if you're not sure on how to ask for that kind of thing, I'd recommend you read <S> When I say No, I Feel Guilty by Manuel J. Smith. <S> Don't let the title of that book mislead you, it's about a lot more than saying no. <S> Also, since you don't have much time to read it before you talk to your boss, I recommend you work through the book backwards and read the examples and the techniques first before you read the theories. <S> Both the fog and the broken record techniques are all you need. <S> And once you understand both those ideas, you'll be ready to ask for what you want more effectively.
| You really should have your next job lined up a month before your internship ends.
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What to do when interviewers don't want to interview? I was interviewing at this company (an established startup), and the interviewers appeared to be uninterested in talking at all. I was interviewed by the CEO and another person. The CEO didn't say anything the whole time. The whole interview happened in less than 5 minutes, the interviewer didn't bother to greet me, my answers were interrupted, and when I indicated that I had no further questions, I was returned with a final "Thank you.". What's the mind game being played here? Should I be begging them and go on and on about my qualifications? Or should I just pretend I don't care? It is possible that the interviewers were tired or distracted by their other tasks. I have no idea how many people were interviewed that day. Also, if the result has already been determined, what's the point of asking me to the interview anyway? <Q> Clearly that interviewer thinks you're a waste of time to interview. <S> It is unlikely a mind game is being played here. <S> That reason for the short interview could be because: <S> The interviewer doesn't think the company needs a new person in that role. <S> The interviewer knows the company isn't really going to hire someone in that role. <S> However, the reason doesn't really matter. <S> They don't want you. <S> Get over it and move on. <A> I do not think there is a "mind game" going on. <S> Consider that they have filled the position. <S> Or budget slashed. <S> Or the interviewer was thrown in at the deep end at the last minute. <S> Perhaps the interview has personal problems. <S> Either way - chalk it up to experience. <S> It was a job that was not meant to be. <S> Better luck next time <A> I would opine the following. <S> The person interviewing you knows his/her opinion would not matter. <S> For example, I had an on-site interview where I met with several people. <S> One of the interviews was with someone in upper management. <S> It became very clear that this interview was just a formal procedure, since I will likely not be working with him anyways. <S> It is the technical interviews with colleagues and team leader (this job was technical) that really counts. <S> So he didn't care who the team picked. <S> It simply did not matter to him, and he has other things on his plate to get to. <S> The person interviewing you is unsatisfied with his/her job. <S> For instance, this person might be considering leaving the company and has no stake in whether you get hired or not. <S> He/she is probably too busy trying to find his/her next gig.
| The interviewer thinks you're totally unsuited for the job.
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How to react when a recruitment agency lies to a company about salary? I am temping for a company, and a week ago we found out that the recruitment agency has been lying to both me and the company about the salary. They are charging the company X dollars, and have told them that they are paying me %85 of X, but in reality they are paying me %60. Is there anything that can be done? This calculation is valid both before and after taxes. And I know this because HR manager of the company showed me the agreement they have signed with the recruitment agency, and asked if I was being paid what the recruitment agency was telling them or not. <Q> Based on the edit to the question, it appears that the employer already suspects the agency of some wrongdoing. <S> You need a new agency, either way. <S> Either this incident upsets them and they end their relationship with you, or it upsets you <S> and you end your relationship with them. <S> Surely there are other agencies and employment arrangements you can find. <S> Sorry that you feel you're being taken advantage of. <S> Good luck! <A> Outside of talking to a lawyer and closely examining your contract, you should definitely never work with that agency again. <S> Suggest to your employer to do the same. <A> You have a contract with the agency, and the company that you are doing work for has a contract with the agency. <S> Does the agency fulfil your contract? <S> In that case, you can't do anything. <S> On the other hand, the agency doesn't seem to fulfil the contract with the company. <S> If their contract says that the company pays $X and the agency keeps 15% and pays 85% to you, but the agency pays only 60% to you, then the company can demand that either the remaining 25% are paid to you, or that their payments are reduced so that the money you receive is 85% of what you pay. <A> If you are contracted to get 85% of X <S> then I would inform the agency that you are being underpaid and ask for an explanation. <S> If you are contracted for a set amount then you have no realistic options apart from moving on.
| Unless your contract with the agency prohibits your disclosing the details of your contract/pay with their customers (your current job), you should answer their question honestly, and let the company do what it feels it must do.
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Forbidden relationships between subordinates and managers -- is it possible or impossible to handle it without banning it? While drafting the workplace rules of a small business, I got to the part where I have to decide what to do with workplace romance, and I'm indecisive as to what to do with romantic relationships between a manager and a subordinate. A previous job I once held had a strict policy of forbidding that kind of romance and making it a valid reason for termination from the company, and seeing other posts in this site on that matter, I would believe the best way to proceed would be indeed by forbidding these relationships. However... I don't know what happens elsewhere, but at least in my country, forbidden romance is considered to be the most passionate and exciting kind. So if I were to prohibit romantic relationships between a manager and a subordinate, and an employee falls in love with his manager, this will result in a forbidden love that will cause terrible tensions in the workplace as both parties try as hard as possible to keep it on the down low but subconsciously let it slip into the workplace every now and then. And coming the day said relationship ends up falling apart, this failed affair will translate into visible and seemingly gratuitous tensions between the manager and the subordinate. And at the same time, I wouldn't like to have to fire a valuable employee or a competent manager just because their heart decided to aim for the wrong person. With that in mind, is it possible to allow romantic relationships between managers and subordinates? A policy that comes into my mind is having the couple disclose their relationship to the management and putting a closer watch on the decisions and moves of these two employees in order to prevent their relationship from contaminating the workplace as much as possible. <Q> I would believe the best way to proceed would be indeed by forbidding these relationships. <S> Why? <S> They're certainly not advisable, and conflict of interest is almost inevitable, but if you're in a small business, making detailed rules like that on what employees can and cannot do in their free time is a waste of time. <S> As you properly pointed out, explicitly forbidding something for comparatively little reason is going to make it more enticing. <S> I suggest you don't explicitly forbid this, but instead deal with it on a case-by-case basis. <S> Some of these relationships can be no problem at all. <S> An example would be a member of the Janitorial Staff dating an Office worker. <S> Big Corporations often do these Boilerplate "No employee relationships allowed period" rules to avoid having to properly deal with the individual cases, but you shouldn't do that when starting a small business. <A> You are their employer not their relationship councillor: as such, your duty is to their productivity, efficiency and not breaking any workplace laws about bullying etc. <S> If they want a relationship then everything is easy: one of them has to resign. <S> The purpose of the policy is to protect the employer - not to make people happy. <S> Except indirectly, a small employer who goes bankrupt due to being sued for workplace harassment will make a lot of people unhappy. <S> Of course, we all know that this type of thing will go on clandestinely, however, the policy has changed this from being a workplace harassment problem for the employer to being a misconduct problem for the employees. <A> I have to say I've never ever seen this kind of thing in a workplace rules policy. <S> While I can see the practical reason for requiring it, I think it's best left alone, and instead have strict rules about workplace bullying, favouritism, sexual harassment (include public displays of affection on company property) and that kind of thing. <S> i.e. the practical stuff. <S> Perhaps when it came to employee evaluation, a manager would have to disclose anything that might lead to a conflict of interest which this would include. <S> For a start, I very think it would be very difficult to enforce. <S> Employees have the right to do what they want in their own time, and you're kind of trying to take control of their personal lives. <S> But what are you going to do if you find out they are meeting up every night? <S> How would you make them stop? <S> Threaten disciplinary action? <S> Start asking them about their sex lives? <S> Will you stop them meeting up as friends too? <S> That could have similar consequences (favouritism, negative feeling after a falling out). <S> And hire employees whose professionalism you can trust. <S> Also, I wouldn't even sure it would be legal to have such a stipulation.
| Therefore, it is far simpler and cleaner for the business to simply say that any type of romantic relationship between employees (not just supervisor/supervisee) are off-limits. I would think it better to trust the professionalism of your employees.
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Got job offer, counteroffered, asked to prove current salary, can't due to confidentiality, then no reply I received a job offer on 12th May. While I was pretty much 100% ready to accept, I decided to reply with a counteroffer as the offered salary was actually in the lower range for the position and there is only medical cover (no other benefits) and annual leave will be 10 days less than my current job. I was polite and respectful in my counteroffer and persuaded that I worth more and asked for the higher range salary. I think I was asking quite high but I stated that we can come to a mutual agreement. I've never negotiated salary before, so this was very stressful for me. I was offered 56k and I countered with 66k and extra 3 days AL, expecting them to come back with a much lower number, which I'd almost definitely be fine with. On 18th May, the HR asked me to provide them the current salary with payment proof. On 19th May, I replied that salary is confidential due to Data Privacy. Since then, there is no reply. I am terrified that they'd simply revoke the offer instead of negotiating. Of course, I understand that HR needs time, which has calmed me somewhat, but the fact that it's now 23rd May (three working days since I counteroffered) and I've still heard no response is freaking me out. I really want that job and would accept even if they are firm with the initial offer. Should I e-mail back and what to say in the email? Should I restate my flexibility on the number? Should I say I would accept the initial offer? Should I give it one more day? (There is no deadline written.) <Q> In general, keeping salary data private helps the employer avoid tricky conversations about imbalances. <S> While I'm not sure what "Data Privacy" is, it's curious that this particular employer would be so cavalier to ask you to prove your current salary. <S> I wonder if they would mind if you got the job and published your new salary. <S> Now then, on to the matter at hand. <S> This company can either afford you, or they can't. <S> They either want you, or they don't. <S> (They already made an offer, so they seem to want you.) <S> Your current salary at this point would mostly be a tool for them to judge how low they can go. <S> My advice to you is to stop worrying and let them take their time. <S> If they take your offer, great. <S> If not, particularly on the (alleged) basis that you wouldn't prove your current salary, something's fishy. <S> In the meantime, you're free to continue interviewing elsewhere. <S> You may find a bigger fish. <A> It's a negotiation you can only wait for their response without weakening your position. <S> It was a big jump you were asking for more than 20% more, and that would probably need approval just to consider you as a reasonable candidate. <S> I have advertised jobs and found people who I think are worth X amount, but the job itself is only worth Y amount to me... <S> so if they're not happy with Y, then too bad. <S> I don't care what the pay grade is normally, I only care with what works for me. <S> Nothing positive will come out of trying to work out what they're doing with no information to go on. <S> Keep job hunting and keep patient and don't sell yourself short. <A> If you really wanted the Job you should've taken the Initial offer. <S> What you can do is: <S> Wait a full work week and ask for the Status (add a Response data). <S> Prepare an answer on why the data is confidential. <S> Start looking for other Jobs. <S> Don't take the Initial offer unless they state it is not of the table. <S> Also start adding expected Response Dates, this not only gives you an early excuse to ask for a Status. <S> I would also like to stress that we can only give you Options to take. <S> What you do with that is and will be your choice. <A> You made your bed, and now you have to sleep in it. <S> You said you replied this on May 19th. <S> The time in between that and today was a weekend, so HR is probably slow on the uptake. <S> What you can do <S> : Wait a week and then send an email asking for a status update. <S> They may reply and require you to prove that the salary data is confidential. <S> Have the proof for this ready. <S> Wait a week and then accept this opportunity as lost, and move on. <S> Start looking for new jobs now and don't wait. <S> Essentially, this is one of the risks that can happen when you ask for a higher salary then they initially offer. <S> They might decide to drop the offer alltogether. <S> Wether or not thats the case will take some time to find out <S> , I'd say a week is fair to wait for them to respond. <A> Perhaps reply back with a range that your salary is in? <S> (You have the option to choose this...) <S> It shows you are still interested <S> but I think you should stick to your guns on this one. <S> If HR are just slow, perhaps get in touch with the Hiring Manager/interviewer? <S> Explain the predicament but stick to your data privacy guns.
| At the moment there is nothing to worry about, they will be reviewing their information and making up their minds whether to counter offer or not.
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How to prevent my boss from forcefully making my team work overtime My boss thinks we are not producing enough work quick enough, the reality is that all of my reporting indicates that we are. My cumulative flow diagram has shown a massive amount of backlog work done. My team are also generally meeting their sprint goals from burndown charts. The challenges that I am having: After showing the burn down charts, he wants us to increase our velocity so that we finish our sprints sooner so that we can cram more work in. So I guess that equates to working longer hours i.e. overtime? If we finish our sprints early, we then switch to kanban or begin another sprint. After keeping track of progress, the average amount of points my team can handle in a working week is about 7.7 points. PO's attitude is if they can complete 7.7 points, why not increase it to 9 or 10 points? I have responded that it will lead to the team becoming over worked and probably work a lot of overtime. He seemingly doesn't care since it is in his interest to get as much work done as soon as possible. What can I do if: PO/Boss does not seemingly care about how many hours in a week the team works even if it leads to overpaid overtime. My boss's mentality seems to be that 40 hours a week is the minimum amount of time the team should spend working, when it is their contracted hours Thanks Edit since question was posted: Overtime is unpaid Group actively takes on more work after sprint has ended. <Q> So your boss says: If you can do 7.7 points in a week, why can't you do 9 or 10 points? <S> I'd say: If your boss pays you $X per week, why can't he pay 1.3X or 1.5 X a week? <A> If you are doing Scrum (which I assume you do) you are making some basic mistakes your ScrumMaster should correct. <S> PO's attitude is if they can complete 7.7 points, why not increase it to 9 or 10 points? <S> Your PO can have any attitude he wants to. <S> That's his personal privilege. <S> However , he cannot allocate tasks for a sprint. <S> He can only prioritize . <S> The team picks it's tasks for the sprint. <S> If you take on more you can manage, you will fail the sprint goal. <S> And that can happen. <S> If it cannot happen in your company, you are not doing Scrum, you still have command and control with your tyrant boss calling himself PO. <S> Job titles doesn't make it Scrum. <S> So in short: There is no way a PO can force unpaid overtime if you are doing Scrum. <S> Go to your ScrumMaster and have him explain how a PO is working to your current PO. <S> If this is not possible and you actually only do Scrum as a token process around the fact that your boss is the absolute monarch <S> then I guess nobody here will be able to help you. <S> The obvious things apply: join a union, demand to get paid for your work or get out and find a healthier job. <A> Chances are, you cannot prevent you boss from forcing overtime on your team (it depends on what's written in their contracts). <S> Example: (assuming your team is already working at high productivity, which it sounds like they are) <S> The team are currently working 40-hours a week to produce X amount of work. <S> This is on a par with / greater than comparable teams, so there is not much room to increase productivity further. <S> In order to produce 25% more work in the same amount of time, we will need to work overtime or hire more developers. <S> More developers takes time and money. <S> Overtime means either overtime pay, or reducing hours at some point in the future to make up for this. <S> Which would you prefer? <S> Depending on your company/contracts, your team might not get paid overtime. <S> In which case you can instead (or additionally) include: <S> but they will get very unhappy, less productive overall and/or quit their jobs if you make them work too many hours <S> In essence, your boss's requirements have consequences (costs). <S> You cannot force them to change their mind, only provide them with a full picture of the trade-offs involved. <S> If they decide to go ahead anyway, then that is their prerogative, but you will have done everything you could and should do. <S> Addendum <S> : Document Everything <S> If it's not in writing (or in an e-mail), it didn't happen. <S> If your boss goes ahead anyway, and the things you predicted come to pass, then you're going to want some kind of record that you warned them about this, and they decided to do it anyway. <A> You can't prevent your boss. <S> You can explain why it's a bad idea or why you don't want to do it, but you don't have the last say in the matter. <S> And overtime means more money which is usually welcome, if not by you, then perhaps by other members of the team. <S> I know I would have been unhappy if my leader consistently argued against me making a bit of extra $$.
| Even if he pressures the team to take on more that it can possibly manage in a sprint, there is no way he can order overtime. Perhaps it would be better to adjust your own perceptions to be more like those of your boss, it's one way to get ahead. So what you need to do here is explain the consequences and see if they are willing to accept them.
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I'm leaving because I didn't get a raise. What should I tell my employer if they ask why I'm leaving? I have been working with my current employer for about two years now. I filled in a specific niche role, which has since expanded to become an important part of our software department. I not only completed all the projects tasked to me over the year, but completed nearly an additional 50% more projects than I was tasked, with excellent results. So, I felt it prudent to request a substantial salary increase (~20%). Unfortunately, I'm told that I already earn the maximum amount my company offers for my current role, and they can't pay more. I countered with the suggestion that if that's the case, I should be promoted, if that's what's required to advance my financial goals. The company has higher echelons of technical roles (ie: senior engineering specialist, principal engineer, etc) and less technical roles (ie: team lead, 50-50 split of technical and non-technical work, etc) that earn more than I do at my current role (senior engineer). Being brutally honest, I plan to leave this company because the work is too easy, I'm not learning anything new, and the pay should be increasing more, considering what I bring to the table. I've tried to bring up these concerns with my boss without sounding like a "flight risk", but it seems that the only way I can demand a suitable raise is with a written employment offer in hand. At that point, it's already too late, IMHO, since it's not a raise, but a counter-offer I'm working with. I never accept counter-offers, since the well is effectively poisoned at that point, and I'll likely be overlooked for future advancement. I am in late-stage negotiations with a separate company where I have been able to negotiate a whopping 30% increase over my current salary. A few months back, I was able to pull off a 4% raise, but given that local inflation rates are at 2.5% and the cost of housing is exorbitant, only 1.5% of the pay increase was merit based. I do know that my manager went to extraordinary lengths to make a case for increasing my pay substantially, but the idea was shot down by the higher-ups. Is there some kind of non-generic reason for leaving I could provide my boss with? It seems he's done everything he can to help me, and the company I will be working for has a few employees there that used to work for my current company, so I'm sure gossip will flow. I don't want to say something like "not enough pay", and having that somehow be known to my future employer. Also, I don't want to screw over my old boss with something like "job was too easy". Is there some way to re-phrase this as something that doesn't make me sound money hungry (gotta pay the bills) or makes my boss look bad? <Q> I think you should tell your boss that lack of promotion and pay increases contributed to your decision to leave. <S> Your boss would be able to say to upper management <S> "I told you we needed to pay Big Red more, you refused, and so Big Red left. <S> ", perhaps expressed more diplomatically. <S> That would be useful ammunition the next time the boss is recommending a pay increase or promotion for a team member. <S> Handing them that ammunition is a fitting reward for going to "extraordinary lengths" to try to get you a substantial increase. <S> Making up some other reason, downplaying pay, on the other hand, may lead to upper management questioning your boss' judgement that a substantial increase was appropriate, weakening their hand the next time a similar issue comes up. <S> Upper management would be able to counter with "Big Red would have left anyway, for reason X.". <S> The negotiations leading to a 30% increase have probably already given your future employer the idea that pay matters to you. <A> There is nothing to gain from unfiltered honesty in an exit interview. <S> If the company could not address your concerns while you were employed with them , chances are slim that they will change anything based on a short talk upon your departure. <S> On the other hand, what you do say in an exit interview can hurt you. <S> People can be offended when a co-worker leaves, and negative comments can come across as sour grapes, even if they are well-intended. <S> Your remarks can work their way across the company like a game of telephone until suddenly you're the one who's throwing everyone under the bus. <S> It can be a small world in one's particular industry. <S> People move around from job to job. <S> No good reason to risk future opportunities to give advise to a company that may or may not really deserve it. <A> You can mention the pay as another reason if you want to but your boss probably suspects it anyway. <A> It sounds like you're still in the process of getting a job. <S> Be sure you have a job and offer in hand before turning in your notice. <S> Let me first say that don't be surprised or offended if you turn in your 2 weeks <S> and nobody seems to care. <S> Chances are they'll just say goodbye, good luck and do the standard 2 weeks and find a new employee. <S> With that said, if they do happen to ask why then simply say you wish there were more opportunities to grow your career. <S> I very much doubt they'd ask that or even care. <S> The exit interview tend to generally ask what you found favorable about the company, etc just to document any trend in people leaving. <S> Leaving because of low pay is generally not something worthy of HR's time as that is common and especially if they do a good market analysis in the area and based on your reviews within the company.
| You can just say that you found an opportunity that better aligns with your career goals and leave it at that.
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Politeness in international contacts I work and live in Scandinavia, and by culture we use a person's first name when speaking to someone, colleagues, clients and so on. In general we use the second-person singular when addressing someone, we are very informal and being formal can be seen as if someone is a bit of a stuck-up. I have been told on more than one occation that I am very polite. I work in an international setting in design engineering, with my supervisor being German and contact with clients who are both European and American. I have the habit of always addressing my clients in mails and so on with their title, if I know it, or with Mr/Mrs/Ms etc. and their last name. When in contact with clients they sometimes reply with my first name in mail or telephone conversations, whereas I stick with Mr and so on. Would it be considered rude not to say their first name after this kind of an invite? I have nothing against it, but it feels somewhat forced to have a jovial conversation calling eachother Mike and Eddy one day and the next time they contact me they can be completely livid because the product does'nt work as they expect. They usually don't call me by my first name at these times... <Q> There are people who think everything should be done in the way they are used to. <S> And there are other people who realise that the world is a large place, with lots of different cultures, and lots of different ways to do things. <S> You can't know everything. <S> Whatever you do, you will step on the toes of some of the first type of people. <S> It's their problem. <S> The second type of people, they won't be offended by anything. <S> If you do something that could get you into trouble (which is unlikely), they will tell you, that's it. <A> When dealing with someone from another culture, I generally follow their lead. <S> If he calls me "Mr Smith", then I'll call him "Mr Jones". <S> If he calls me "Bob", I'll call him "Fred". <S> If he calls me "sir", etc. <S> I'd stop short of obvious regionalisms. <S> Like if I was working with an Australian and he called me "hey mate", it would just sound weird for me to say the same. <S> But I might call him "buddy" or some other comparable Americanism. <S> Actually I follow this same rule when I start a job with a new company or join a new club, as every group can have its own "culture" -- <S> culture isn't just a national thing. <S> If something the other person says offends you, well, my first rule is to be very slow to be offended, especially if there is no indication that offense was intended. <S> If everybody in their office routinely refers to each other as "fatso" and "dorkface" and the like and they started calling me "baldy", I'd just laugh along with it. <S> But if it really did offend you, I'd try to just politely say, "Hey, please call me Charlie". <S> 9 times out of 10 people will comply. <S> Etc. <S> But I don't think that's the issue here <S> so I won't go into that further. <S> If someone indicates they're offended by something you call them, I'd just say, "Oh, I'm sorry, <S> what do you want me to call you? <S> " Barring them saying they want to be called "your lord high majesty master of the universe", I'd go along with whatever they said. <S> For initial contact, I generally avoid calling people anything. <S> I just say, "Hi". <S> Usually the person will say, "Hi, I'm Bob", or "Hi, I'm Mrs Jones", and you can take your cue from there. <S> If you're writing a letter or something where you need some address, it never hurts to be formal on first contact. <S> Call them "Mr Fred Jones" or whatever. <A> From a North American perspective very few people will think it rude to use their first name, very few people will find a title uncomfortable, and almost everyone won't deeply care one way or the other. <S> There is no one correct universal answer, so stick to what you are comfortable with. <A> <A> I have lived and worked in the US, Germany, and Japan. <S> I have also done international business with contacts in about 15 additional countries. <S> When I work with Americans, I use their first names, even if we don't know each other very well. <S> When I work with Germans, I use Herr/Frau followed by their family names, because this seemed to be the way of doing it in the office I worked in while I was in Germany. <S> In Japan, I address people as family name - san, because that is the culture there. <S> So, I think you need to just do some simple research on the country you're dealing with and figure out the cultural norm for that country. <S> When in doubt, ask. <S> I have never encountered any problems when simply asking somebody how they would like to be addressed. <A> In the United States different standards apply depending on who and where it is. <S> For example, in "casual" places like California, Washington and the southwest, people move to a first name pretty fast. <S> In more formal places, like the south and rural northeast (Maine, New Hampshire), Mr. is the rule. <S> In fact, in the south, young people will often not even call me by name, but say "sir". <S> The easiest thing to do is let the other party make the first move. <S> Just imitate whatever they do. <S> If they call you by first name, do the same, and vice versa, as long as it is a peer. <S> If it is a client, it is more tricky. <S> If you are a peer of the client (do you make as much money as they do), then imitate. <S> If you are a subordinate, stick with Mr. or Dr. as the case may be. <S> It's a lot better to be stuck up, than to be rude. <S> If a title is used in the right way and tone of voice, it can be just as comforting as using a first name. <S> Usually, if somebody seems stuck up, it is due to a lot more than using a proper title. <S> Personally, I find people who call me by first name to be presumptuous. <S> If a junior person addresses me in a casual way I consider that highly disrespectful <S> and I arrange things <S> so I am not in contact with that person again.
| If in doubt, it will almost never be considered rude to ask how people would prefer to be addressed, or how to say or ask something politely. In my experience, it's best to cater to the individual person you are dealing with. Delivery and manner of speech is a lot more important than use of titles in determining whether you seem "stuck up".
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How can I communicate my need for more challenging work? Is it considered rude or negative to say that I am not challenged by my tasks I am responsible for in my role? I currently work as a database developer (less than a year at this job). I have a good reputation and people are impressed with the work I produce. I rarely come across a task that I consider challenging or really takes me a long time to understand. This does not mean that my job is mind-numbingly boring, but the things that I find challenging and truly engaging are things that I get to do infrequently due to lack of a need for it (like complex query tuning or deep internal diagnostics) or do not have a direct connection to my work (Code-Golfing, learning new code). When asked, will saying that I am not challenged by what I am doing or saying that the work I am doing it not hard paint me in a negative light? <Q> There's no good way to say <S> "my job is not challenging" because employers automatically equate it with <S> "he will go find work that's more challenging" . <S> If you truly want to remain with that company it might be time to take a more proactive role and find project for yourself such optimizing a database, etc. <S> If you don't have that sort of latitude you might simply propose those projects to your managers and advise them on how it might help the company. <S> Either way though, keep that particular opinion to yourself. <A> I'd put it this way: <S> your work is interesting and well within your abilities. <S> It's the same thing really <S> , it's just the way you put the words together. <S> This is not unusual at all - there are good and smart people in every field, and I doubt everyone of them is doing challenging work every moment. <S> Of course, just because the technical work is easy for you doesn't mean you are not enjoying it. <S> You can be producing high quality work, on time. <S> You can also be learning other stuff like project management, communications because you wish to progress to senior positions. <S> The trick here is, if somebody asks you, make sure your presentation is positive. <A> The best place to bring this up is at annual review, where your objectives are discussed. <S> This way you can discuss it not as a dissatisfaction with your current role, but as an additional way to prove your development. <S> I typically give my team stretch objectives in areas they want to develop in, or that may be a useful area for my team to develop new capabilities. <S> That way I can benefit as well. <A> Much of communication is about how you present the information. <S> A good manager will want employees to be challenged (at least those that WANT to be challenged) and to give them opportunities for growth. <S> Nobody has work that is challenging ALL the time, and it is a negative statement that makes it sound like you are unhappy with your work. <S> Instead of focusing on what you don't want, try focusing on what you want instead. <S> "Boss, I'd like to continue to grow my skills. <S> Are there some opportunities for me to take on some additional, more challenging projects?" <S> Now, instead of telling your boss that you are bored, you are telling them that you are motivated, ambitious, and want to grow. <S> You could even suggest a project... <S> "ABC report is running really slow. <S> If I have some downtime, do you mind if I try to tune some of the queries and present my findings to you?" <S> Another thing is, before you pose this question, make sure that your current work is A+ and on-time, and not mediocre because you ARE bored. <S> A manager is probably going to think twice about giving you challenges if he isn't confident in your abilities at the current level.
| You can go through your performance, and if you have been absolutely nailing it so far, suggest that for the year ahead you set objectives and some stretch objectives: deliberately aimed at pushing you beyond your comfort zone. Telling your manager, "my work is not challenging," focuses on the wrong thing.
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How important are LinkedIn connections? I do not provide my personal data, including my real name on social media. I don't accept any Facebook friend requests or LinkedIn connection requests, which my friends understand. However, I was wondering, how much it can hurt my future job chances.I am open for job offers, but do not want my name being "googlable" or any other personal information, as we simply do not know, who and what can do it in 40 years, and there is no simple way to "erase" our name from Internet. Does it look strange, that someone who worked for three IT companies doesn't have a LinkedIn profile? <Q> Whether it is strange, weird or not is essentially a cultural matter. <S> My context is Denmark in Northern Europe - where working in IT and not having a LinkedIn profile could probably be viewed as slightly odd. <S> It doesn't need to be that thorough - most profiles are basically headlines - but an empty LinkedIn profile with a fake name and zero connections could signal that you are either 'off-the-grid paranoid' or have 'jobs, but not a career'. <S> Not a show-stopper <S> if you know your stuff - but if you have 2-3 other 'quirks', it could work against you. <S> Regarding what LinkedIn may be used for, I have actually gotten two freelance jobs via LinkedIn (bypassing recruiters) - but that is the exception rather than the norm. <S> LinkedIn IS used intensely by recruiters - and not participating probably does come at a cost, but it is difficult to measure lost opportunities of this sort. <S> The biggest hassle - apart from people posting stuff that (IMHO) belongs on Facebook or similar - are the numerous connection requests from recruiters who have not even viewed my profile. <S> These are rejected, as it seems they merely want to recursively spam my connections. <A> Social media is a tool, just like anything else, you can use it how you want if you understand the pro's and cons. <S> I don't see anything unusual in what you do. <S> I have had a fb profile for a couple of years <S> but I don't use it to land me work, just to connect with family and discuss things of interest with random people in groups. <S> The only thing I've tried selling through it is one of my books, and I think ten sales tops would have been the result in a year, but <S> I must admit it's a terrible book. <S> I've never had a Linkdin and probably never will. <S> To me these things are just tools, and like any tools, you evaluate their usefulness and potential in your own context and then either use them or not. <S> Would they be a sales portal? <S> A potential job portal? <S> Useful networking with your peers? <S> etc,. <S> Personally I don't see a need, so I don't use much and it wouldn't bother me if someone else didn't. <S> But I'm all over google anyway due to some of my work which has nothing to do with social media. <A> You are in control of who you connect to, and why you are connecting to them. <S> I have been on LinkedIn for some time and primarily accept connections from individuals in my industry (information security), and or groups. <S> When I joined groups (pre-spam and sales) <S> I had an opportunity to speak to peers, analyze processes, thoughts, frameworks, and models that have helped immensely. <S> Equally, I have taken an enormous amount of time and effort to answer questions, write "Pulses" (equivalent of a blog for those that don't know what Pulse is). <S> This enabled other peers to either criticize, give guidance, and at times praise that in turn led me to many wonderful opportunities that I would have otherwise NOT have seen. <S> I have been dealing with computing pre-Internet, and am aware of the dangers that "everything is permanent" which enables me to think twice before I speak. <S> So LinkedIn is ultimately what you make of it. <S> Nothing more, nothing less.
| LinkedIn connections are only as important as you make them.
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Assigned work that is above my skill level, how should I handle it? I'm still a junior web developer, I have some trouble with Databases, its my weakness, but I still know some things on them. My boss asked me if I knew databases and I said yes, hoping it was something easy, then he added a task for me that includes heavy knowledge on Databases which I'm not able to learn in short time, hoping me to complete while I still commit to my schedule on other higher priority tasks the higher boss assigned me. This happened because I was advancing as fast as I could to have some spare time on other more time demanding activities, so he thought I had spare time. But right now I'm still not capable of achieving what he wants and demands I complete it by tomorrow. I stated this task about Databases was of less priority and required some support from other workmates, but so far he is just closed to giving me any support. Should I report it to my higher boss? How should I handle this? <Q> You said yes when you knew the answer was no. <S> Time to talk to your boss and admit you don't know as much as you thought you did. <S> If you do so immediately , so the work can be reassigned and/of schedules adjusted, you will only look like a clueless newbie, which is curable. <S> if you delay, you will look much, much worse.. <A> Devote every moment not at work to studying where you are weak. <S> You miscommunicated your skill level, so it's bootstrap time. <S> Don't get discouraged, just jump in and get it done. <A> Given the short time-frame, learning on the job probably won't be an option. <S> If not, then you need to make it clear to your boss that if things remain as they are (ie, you doing the project alone) then it will not get done on time.
| If you're intelligent enough to be a programmer, you should be intelligent enough to upgrade your skillset quickly. It may be that the task is actually simple for people with the required knowledge -- you could ask your coworkers for help. Get a tutor, take a class if you need to.
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I was accused of having said bad things about someone. How to explain to them that I think I did nothing wrong? I went to an event not related to work and met a writer, who is friends with a freelance writer working for us. I told him that the freelance writer submitted an article that is "late". That's what really happened. But to be honest, he delayed our product and caused a huge problem. But I just said "he submitted an article late" and not in a serious tone. In a joking manner. And I followed up that it was because he went out of town and had no Internet. So it wasn't a negative comment. At least for me I think it wasn't. I actually haven't even met this freelance writer. I just know he submitted an article late. So after the weekend passed, the writer wrote an email to our boss, a long email saying that he heard "malicious" things about him that were said by [my full name]. And he was saying a "handful of people". Like I just told that one guy I met at the event. And that he will not get the money we would have paid him and just pay it to me. That just made me feel bad. I thought I was going to get fired because of it. Since our boss can let go people easily. But she was nice about it and understood my side and just told me not to tell anything about what's happeneing internally in the company. Now, I'm going to meet him together with my boss tomorrow. I mean, I will apologise, but I still have to explain myself, because I think I did nothing wrong. The argument I was thinking of is: "Why would I even say malicious things about you when I haven't even met you? And that I work at a completely different department?" But I don't know if that's a good argument. How should I respond to the accusations? How can I get my point across? <Q> Just to be safe, ask your boss how to approach the situation, and take her lead. <S> She may even want to do most of the talking, and only ask you to say a few words. <S> I wouldn't worry about shaking the guy's hand - he most probably won't want you to. <S> If your boss initiates handshakes or anything like that you can go with the flow. <S> Keep in mind that if the company needs the writer to stay happy and keep writing for them you need to ensure that the company's interests are met. <S> If not, they may decide their interests lie in letting you go. <S> Understand that this situation is not personal. <S> A lot of "creative types" are very eccentric, and you have no idea how badly this writer's so called "friend" misrepresented your statements. <S> The author may even be using this situation simply to get a leg up in some negotiation with the company. <S> I think this situation will have taught you two very important questions: <S> Don't discuss company business with random people. <S> In fact, don't even discuss project details with other employees who are not a part of it. <S> And even then, be careful what you say. <S> If you're the guy walking around telling everyone that the project is behind, over-budget, etc. <S> you may find that no one wants you on their team, no matter how true, or factual your statements. <S> Always be diplomatic, especially when speaking to outsiders. <S> Sometimes it's no good fighting and accusation, and you have to swallow your pride for the good of the company/project. <S> Ideally you will have learned lesson #1, and will end up in this situation as infrequently as possible. <A> Now Im gonna meet him together with my boss tomorrow. <S> I mean, i will apologie <S> but i still have to explain myself cause i think i did nothing wrong. <S> But how can i get across my point? <S> My argument that i was thinking is that: "why would i even say malicious things about you when i havent even met you? <S> and that i work at a completely different departtment? <S> " <S> Is that a good argument? <S> I dont know. <S> How should i respond? <S> What will you guys do in this situation? <S> No, it's not a good argument. <S> Look for the small kernel of truth into what he is saying and agree with that part. <S> Once you do that, the writer will most likely deflate his outrage. <S> The bottom line is that you shared slightly negative information about a writer with an outsider. <S> And you shouldn't have done that. <S> Apologize for that part at the very least. <S> And don't worry about the "malicious" label. <S> The writer doesn't know you. <S> Plus, he doesn't know exactly what was said. <S> So of course, lacking all this information, he is assuming the worst in his outrage. <S> Once again, he is assuming the worst, and that is perfectly normal. <S> Assure him that you only spoke to that one person. <S> Do not try to argue with his reasoning. <S> Agree to the part you can agree with. <S> Assure him that you won't do it again. <S> But don't start trying to control exactly what he will think of you (or labels you), that is only going to be counter-productive. <S> Also, don't try to sugarcoat the <S> "he was late because he didn't have internet access" excuse. <S> The writer knows deep down that's a bullshit excuse. <S> That's one of the reasons he's so outraged. <S> He probably knows that some people would see this was a bs excuse and that he would have been better served by saying that he was late and that he simply had no good excuse for it. <A> Your boss may or may not ask you to relate the story you told here. <S> She may ask you to apologize, she may apologize on your behalf, or she may have another strategy. <S> If she does ask you to explain, just be honest and apologetic. <S> It does sound like she is on your side and wants to smooth things over with the writer. <S> These things happen sometimes. <S> Take on board the lesson that you shouldn't discuss matters like this outside of work and move on. <S> To answer the question in the comment, I think it would make sense to chat with your boss about how she wants to conduct the meeting. <S> That way you will be prepared.
| Another thing you should do, is tell the writer the name of the person you spoke to, or at least give him a description of the person in question, and assure him that this was the only person you ever spoke to about him. I strongly advise you to swallow your pride and simply say that you are sorry.
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How to decline a closed-group internal posting? Someone was recently promoted on another team which left their old position available, and now it's currently up for grabs for a few individuals. On behalf of my previous manager, HR has sent an email to myself and several other coworkers (I don't know who or how many) to fill the position. While I'm not interested in the position, should I respond to my manager thanking him for the offer? In my mind I liken it to someone holding up a box with the last doughnut in it and saying "Hey, Bob wants to know if anyone wants the last doughnut", and I feel would be weird to turn to Bob and say "No thanks, but I really appreciate the offer Bob!" tl;dr Does this acknowledgement of my potential warrant a response? <Q> Using your analogy, it's even weirder if he holds up the box and ask people and no one so much as turns around to look at him. <S> Thank you for providing me with this opportunity, but I must respectfully decline. <S> I am very happy with my current position, and wish to continue in this role. <S> I would argue that it's rude not to reply. <A> Decline to HR including a "Thanks for considering me" with your boss CCed. <S> This makes your answer and your appreciation clear. <A> The argument for replying: shows your boss you are in engaged in his communication, a very positive thing. <S> Or informally chat about it; make yourself prepared for that conversation. <S> Some may say it's easier not to reply. <S> Decide which you would rather go for. <S> Perhaps by responding and having a conversation with him is a great channel for career discussion, which is good and gives him an idea of the sort of thing you are looking for. <S> I think if you didn't want to reply, you wouldn't have asked the question, which ironically answers it for you!
| A polite and professional reply will make it clear that you're not interested, and won't leave your boss wondering what's going on: The argument against replying: he's gonna wonder why you don't want it, so I think you should justify perhaps why you don't, as your highlighting it.
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Frustrating response by manager due to mutual misunderstanding. Should I just let it go? Trying to keep this brief: I report to two managers, A and B. I meet infrequently with A (~1x/month) and my day to day work has no impact on her ability to do her job. I work very closely with B and talk to him every day. I asked A for permission to work remotely for two weeks. She told me it was fine if B approved. B told me it was not a problem at all. I brought it up in a meeting with both of them at once and it appeared that everyone was on the same page. A month later, I mentioned in passing to A that I was leaving soon to work remotely. She had forgotten our earlier discussions, and became very frustrated that I had made plans without consulting her. She went on to tell me that it showed a basic lack of professionalism to do what I had done, but that it was common for new hires like me to "lack the emotional maturity" to manage their time effectively. I was very confused by her reaction and I mostly locked up during the conversation. I assumed that I must not have actually told her my plans. I tried to explain that B, who I work with every day, reassured me it was a totally routine thing at the company so I didn't understand why it would be such a big deal. She told me that it was against policy for me to work remotely. After our meeting, she emailed me to say that it turned out no formal policy existed, but she had worked other managers related to her position to create one. (Because of strangeness with the way I am managed, this policy basically only applies to me and a handful of other people across the company.) I confirmed with B later that yes, I had mentioned it in a meeting with both him and A and that A said it was fine pending his approval. I had 100% followed the correct protocol and okayed it with multiple other people on my team whose work would be affected by my absence. It never occurred to me that I would need to make a bigger deal of it to A, since everybody I talked to --- including her, twice --- was extremely nonchalant about it. I cancelled my plans to work remotely. Obviously, misunderstandings happen. I'm sure I was not as clear as I could have been when I discussed it with her. My work is very important to me and I'm not at all bothered by changing my plans... but I am extremely offended by the level of vitriol she responded with because of a misunderstanding on both of our sides. Even if I had made plans without consulting her, I feel like it was totally inappropriate for her to comment on the "emotional maturity" of one of her employees. Is it best for me to just bite my tongue, or should I try to talk with A to resolve: (1) the offense I entirely accidentally caused her and (2) what I feel was a personal attack that she gave me in response? Do I write this off as a loss and just never bring it up again, or try to clear the air? I continue to report to her for about 4 more months, after which I will report only to B. <Q> Lesson #1: always take good notes and create a paper trail. <S> Send out e-mail confirmation for any non-trivial decisions. <S> Working two weeks remotely is non-trivial especially if it's the first time. <S> Include all the specifics so people can pick at them. <S> Example <S> " <S> Hi A&B, as discussed today and approved by you I will be working remotely from AAA to BBB. <S> Thanks for making this happen and let me know if you have any questions or concerns" Miscommunication requires resolution: Not to assign blame, but to make sure it doesn't happen again. <S> Check with manager B to fact check your version of the story. <S> Make sure you have all the details right. <S> Then approach Manager A constructively and ask how to avoid this going forward. <S> Example <S> Hi A <S> , I was very confused about our interaction on (date ZZZ) about me working remotely. <S> I had already discussed this with you and B on (XXX date) and I was under the impression that both of you had agreed to this. <S> Apparently that's not the case, so what should I have done differently here <S> and how should I go about documenting these types of decisions in the future? <S> Ignore the insult. <S> You are in charge of your own behavior not hers. <S> The better you behave, the better will the people around you behave as well. <A> So the sequence was: You asked A, <S> she said it's Ok <S> if B agrees, you asked B who agreed, and a month later you ask A, who has forgotten. <S> She then attacks, using terms like "lacking emotional maturity", when it is all her fault. <S> This was not a misunderstanding. <S> Normally you would reply with an email that you checked your notes, that she was told a month ago, that she said it's Ok if B agrees, that you asked B who agreed, and that you strongly reject her accusation of "basic lack of professionalism" and "lack of emotional maturity". <S> Especially if you told B that you talked to A before asking him for permission. <S> However, that would require a manager A who has some basic professionalism and emotional maturity, and I suspect that both are lacking. <S> Given that, let it pass, take a very strong mental note that manager A has to be treated with care. <S> Take notes on any interaction that you have with her. <S> And when you are in a stronger position in the company, you will enjoy to help taking her down. <S> She is not an asset to your company. <S> Her behaviour with a personal attack on you would have been inappropriate even had she been right, which she wasn't. <A> I concur with everyone who says you should create a paper trail. <S> That doesn't mean going crazy like writing formal letters with each of their thumb prints on it. <S> But it does mean simpler things can be done to "remind" folks of things. <S> For example, if you knew you had to ask for a 1 month long work from home, then maybe you can fire out an email post meeting or set up a calendar of sorts so that it'll be there, they'll know it, and they can't say you didn't told them. <S> Ex. <S> "Why you're working from home!? <S> That is unprofessional. <S> " You: "I'm sorry, I thought it was clear when I sent out the email, <S> dated X/Y that we were on the same page about me working from home." <A> Take it on the chin and learn the lesson that things important to you, are not even worth remembering sometimes to others.
| You may have struck the manager on a bad day, or some other reason, but it's not constructive to conjecture on why's and why nots, put it down to experience and remember what you have learnt about this person. This is a manager either having a leaky brain and taking no notes, or having changed her mind, and what happened here is entirely her fault and her responsibility.
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Is there any way to avoid being terminated after a raise and after turning down other job offers? Let's say Bob is severely underpaid but really loves his job, the short commuting distance, and his coworkers. But sadly none of these things make up for the fact that Bob is at least $15,000 underpaid and, as his family grows, has an increasing need for better wages and an increasing desire to feel monetarily compensated for his worth. Bob spends some significant time job hunting and, after some time and several interviews, gets an offer from a company at the exact wage he wants. As a last effort, Bob goes to his current manager and asks for a wage but without mentioning the other company's offer; no reason to corner what is a relatively a good boss (who in the end has to report to people who make the salary decisions) into an ultimatum situation similar to, "Pay me more or I leave." To his manager's delight (at being able to keep Bob) and to obviously Bob's as well, the pay raise has been green lit and everyone is happy! Bob respectfully turns down the alternate company's offer and things are well for a few weeks. But then, the powers that be decide to let Bob go for no reason known to Bob or his manager other then the stinginess of the company owners that lead Bob into job hunting in the first place. Now, Bob is out of a job and has to go back to job hunting. Not only has he already interviewed and turned down offers with companies, he has to start fresh and from a significantly less pool of companies to choose from (let's say Bob was really scoped in on staying local). Is there a way Bob could have avoided this in the first place? Negotiating some sort of contract where he couldn't be fired just weeks after his raise and turning down other offers? Note: Bob was not fired as a consequence of any action that he took. The owners simply decided they'd rather not pay him at the new salary. <Q> Is there a way Bob could have avoided this in the first place? <S> changes the dynamic between an employer and employee <S> , there is a statistic (although hard enough to verify it may be a myth) that 90% of counter offers leave (or are fired) within 6-12 months, and my experience (and your story) pretty much bears this out. <S> If your friend had been vital they would have paid the money from the start (or seen the signs of them looking and raised the money themselves). <S> What happened still involved an implied ultimatum, and the reaction was to stall until it suited them to remove. <A> From the dollar figure in your salary shortcoming, I am assuming you are <S> US based (otherwise this answer might not hold true) <S> In which case, you have no chance, of doing what you said, i.e., having the company sign such a document, unless you hold the golden key to the success of this company. <S> If this company is treating you like s#!+ as far as the wages go for a long time and know about this to give in to your salary increase demand, they know what they are doing. <S> And they know you want to stay there because you did for such a long time for such a pittance compensation. <S> So they dangle the carrot and let you go as a retaliation, not because they are stingy. <S> If I were you, I would take the other company's offer. <S> They have seen something in you and decided you are worth that much money to them. <S> Unless you seriously oversold yourself and any doubts that you can not deliver what is expected of you there, I would leave without looking back, You might have a good manager and stellar coworkers but at the end of the day, money talks. <S> Obviously for you, it was just whispering for a looong, long time. <A> The general rule is: Don't accept a counter offer. <S> In the best case, a counter offer means you will stay at the old place for a year or so, because your old company knows you want to leave. <S> Worst case, something like this happens.
| Once you decided to leave and you find a good offer, leave. Yes, don't accept a counter offer, ever Leaving (or threatening to leave explicit or not)
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Is it acceptable not to include nationality and the date of birth into CV? I have recently received some criticism that my CV does not include the date of birth and nationality, and I that should add this information in further applications. From the other side, I am not sure if it is moral to use this information as a selection criteria during the hiring process, especially for pre-screening before the first interview (where any questions could be asked). The age can probably be inferred from other dates like university graduation. I am not young but still no so old that it would have major impact on my productivity. The nationality-based selection seems of questionable legality (there is a work-allowing residence permit that I mention in the CV). However if for some reason this information is highly expected, I would of course include it. Is it a requirement? Edit: This question mostly applies to USA and European Union as I am looking for a job in both. <Q> This is highly dependent on your country and local culture. <S> In the US age is a big no no, in Germany, age, marital status and number of children is pretty much the norm. <S> Nationality is a bit different. <S> If your name doesn't sound or you don't look like a native, you should have a sentence about your legal status and work permissions. <S> Your employer needs to know whether visa sponsorship or some such is required and you don't want to let them guess. <S> If you are worried about age discrimination you should rephrase the question as such or ask a new one. <S> What you put or don't put on the resume is really of no consequence in this matter. <S> People find out anyway. <A> Would be interesting to see from whom the criticism came, and where you are based. <S> My answer would be, as a hiring manager and candidate over 20 years plus, going from Junior developer to senior program manager, and someone who has never had either date of birth or nationality on my CV <S> is: <S> No it should not require having either on your CV <S> You are more likely to be discriminated against if you mention age or nationality before they meet you and can be ruled out simply by including these details. <S> I will caveat that where I did mention my nationality in some covering letters, but that was part of an international move <S> and I wanted to draw attention that I had the nationality of the country where I was applying <S> (so it was to my benefit). <A> Im going to offer a different perspective, I am from germany. <S> It is completly normal here to include date of birth, place of birth and nationality in the CV. <S> Not including it here will most likely get your resume binned right away. <S> There is a sort of template for CVs here ("Lebenslauf"), and not following it or missing crucial information (like Age, date of birth, nationality, etc) will almost automatically disqualify you from most positions.
| So while it might be acceptable not to include it in other countries, like the US or the UK, in Germany it is definitely not advisable.
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What to do at meetings with nothing about your work? Sometimes I'm invited to meetings with other deparments. Even though these meetings are very informative, most of the time I don't have anything relevant to say because those meetings are relevant to the other people more than to my own work.How do I behave so that I don't seem disrespectful to my peers at the meeting? <Q> Listen. <S> Stay off Facebook. <S> Take notes if you're hearing informative things. <S> When you get back to your desk, tell your department-mates what they need to know. <S> Avoid the following disrespectful behaviours at all meetings, whether there is content related to your work or not: playing a game, reading facebook, being on stack <S> *, etc whispered side conversations with people sitting next to you handling your email - deleting spam, sending short replies, dealing things into folders doing work such as debugging or working on a presentation <S> In some workplaces, there are hours-long meetings with well written agendas that force people to be in the room even though what's happening doesn't matter to them. <S> In those places, doing other work while you wait for your turn is not considered disrespectful. <S> Such places are the exception rather than the rule; if you see many other people working in the meeting you will know it might be ok for you to do so. <S> However if you've been invited so that you can listen and learn, doing anything other than listening is disrespectful, so don't. <A> Talk to the person who invited you. <S> Not to find out how to look like you are participating, but to find out your purpose at the meeting. <S> Sometimes a person is invited to represent their department, and they need to bring back information to their team, or to represent their teams point of view. <S> If you don't know what is expected of you <S> you won't know how active you need to be. <S> It could mean that you only need to be active for one topic, and can fill the rest of the time with other tasks, while still remaining in the meeting. <S> In other cases you need to be taking notes throughout the meeting to capture the required info. <S> For the non-active parts you need to find something that will allow you to maintain partial focus on the meeting, and not distract others. <S> It also needs to be something work related. <S> I have used times like this to read and markup a document for editing. <S> Others I know have used the opportunity to brainstorm a couple of idea they have been thinking about. <A> Do not feel obligated to participate in every meeting which exists. <S> When it's only tangentially related to your work and you have nothing meaningful to say, opt out, use your time more productively and read the protocol later. <A> It depends on company culture. <S> Unless you are a core participant who is actually being talked to and queried upon most of the time. <S> And of course if you choose not to pay attention nobody ought to be expecting you to know exactly what was just discussed. <S> Of course if you're never needed you just shouldn't have accepted the invite in the first place. <S> And if you called the meeting or are very needed in it, you should be active always.
| If someone asks you a question, answer it. Where I've worked, you bring your laptop and do whatever work you need until you're needed in a meeting.
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Not happy in my job as software engineer, should I contact another company that previously made me an offer? After my graduation I interviewed with multiple companies for a job as a software engineer. I got two offers that really interested me, accepted one and declined the other. 5 months in my job, the company seems satisfied with me, but I have the feeling that I have learnt very little and I have discovered that engineers are asked to develop quickly instead of with quality, which frustrates me. It's well paid but I don't find myself stimulated. At the time I took this job I had another offer that I declined. It's a company in another domain, and it's a good one. I kept in touch with them and I haven't burnt bridges. I am starting to regret choosing the first offer over the second one. Since my probation period in my company ends in one months, I am starting to feel like if I commit to it for a much longer period, I will be expressing remorse every day. What would the other company think of me if I contacted then to ask if they would be interested in me? <Q> You should, but keep it positive . <S> Explain you had a hard time choosing between them and the other company. <S> Explain why in the end you chose the other company. <S> Then give 1 or 2 reasons why now your views have changed, but don't become too negative. <S> You're not learning very fast, but are doing routine work, and there is no promise of that changing soon. <S> The focus is too much on quantity instead of quality. <S> Do be careful: often people fresh out of school carry a lot of assumptions on how the real world works, and will find they are wrong. <S> A lot of companies focus on quantity/speed over quality, delivering 10 projects on 90% quality just brings in more money than delivering 9 projects with 95% quality. <S> Don't make yourself "unhirable" by requiring the world works the way you want, instead of you working the way the world wants. <A> If your probation ends in one month then you need to apply with the other company now. <S> From apply to written offer is often more than one month. <S> Don't worry so much about the why you are leaving. <S> If the prior company still wants you then they want you. <S> If they ask you why you are leaving just say upon reflection I think you guys are probably a better fit for me. <A> Contacting the other company certainly won't hurt... <S> but after 5 months, the position you interviewed is long gone. <S> If f they have an opening that requires similar skills, you will almost certainly have to go through the whole interviewing process again, and will be competing against a different group of people. <S> If you are going to look elsewhere, plan on doing the whole job search again, rather than just asking that one company. <S> Make sure you know exactly what you want to be different, and make sure your expectations are reasonable, before you start. <S> And be prepared to explain that when you are being interviewed, or companies may worry that you won't last with them either. <S> As others have said, though, 5 months is a short enough time to suggest your expectations may be unreasonable, unless something is exceptionally wrong with your current employer.
| Be positive, show that you're willing to change if it needs to be. If they keep pushing then say I would rather work in your domain. Stay away from negative - even quantity over quality might not come off as positive.
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Growing from one-person-team to multiple people At my workplace, I used to work alone for quite some time on some projects . Fortunately, now there is money and (hopefully suitable) people to take some from that work off me. I will still be around and do some specific tasks in those projects. The daily routine business and some time-consuming tasks are taken by someone else, so that I can concentrate on development. Now I am thinking about how to manage that transformation from a one-person-team to a two-, three- or maybe four-person-workforce . So far, I have come up with the following steps and strategies: allow enough time for training of the newbies, do a workflow simulation so that they can learn, try and break everything before it is for real transfer responsibilities one-at-a-time and check back to see whether things go well before adding new items to the pile after the training and transfer period, discuss and define key resposibilities for every member while emphasizing that everyone must have an idea what the others are doing, i.e. to carry on their tasks smoothly if someone is sick for some time While I am not formally a manager, I understand that my managers trust in me to sort of coordinate what is going on in my area. So I am not trying to become a sub-manager, but rather support my colleagues in working in the project and creating their niches each, while I still want to "keep my foot in the doorstep" for my development-oriented niche. How to support the change process from an one-person-team to an actual working group with distributed responsibilities? <Q> Before you think about how to train and manage them, you need to think about the job itself. <S> When I was a one-person team I developed processes that worked well for me. <S> I could also afford to be a little casual about some things, because I was the only person affected. <S> When I was given a team the challenge wasn't just to teach them but to figure out if changes were now needed. <S> So take stock. <S> Are you using some sort of task-tracking system or just keeping things in your head? <S> Are you isolating individual changes so they don't conflict with each other? <S> Are you maintaining any internal documentation? <S> If not, maybe you need to change some of that before you start training people. <S> Because while "read my mind" has worked well for you so far, it's going to be really hard to teach. <S> I didn't have any super-junior people, which helped -- for them I'd probably give well-defined tasks to ramp up on and defer plunging them into the deep just yet. <S> I encouraged a collaborative attitude and frequent conversations about what was working well, what was confusing, what was really hard... <S> and over time we experimented and made improvements. <S> Everybody was, and felt, part of it, and we converged on something that worked well for a growing team. <A> Most of the results will depend on who you are hiring. <S> Joel Spolsky tells it better than I could : <S> The importance of Quality recruits <S> “I guess not. <S> Oh, wait. <S> You said I have a staff of two programmers?” <S> Right. <S> “Who are they?” <S> Does that matter? <S> “Sure! <S> If the team doesn’t get along, we’ll never be able to work together. <S> And I know a few superstar programmers who could crank out a Fortran compiler by themselves in one week, and lots of programmers who couldn’t write the code to print the startup banner if they had six months.” <S> Now we’re on to something! <S> In other words, depending on wether people arriving to help will be mediocre or superstars, the appropriate answer is completely different. <S> Often(but <S> not always, it's also personality-dependent), a mediocre coworker needs to be pushed in the back to advance. <S> A superstar coworker will advance alone by himself, but not always on the most important direction - those people tend to be more independant-minded. <S> TL;DR <S> : learn to know those people, and learn how to help them being helpful. <A> When I did this I tried and failed a couple of ways, especially trying to go cheap and training someone. <S> My experience is that firstly you need someone who will hit the ground running, costs a bit extra but you get off to a good start. <S> Trainees are too much headaches, you don't know how quickly they learn, how committed they are, and you have to train them AND do all the work at the same time. <S> Very stressful while you're also doing all the extra paperwork <S> (and there is a LOT) <S> that comes with employing people. <A> Depends entirely on who you're comfortable hiring. <S> Do you need an underling who will follow you and who you need to train and teach? <S> Do you want a teammate with equal responsibilities? <S> Are you fine with hiring someone completely new to the project who will become your mentor? <S> Depending on how invested you are in the project and how much time you've had for personal growth, option 2 and 3 are not always realistic, but if you can make it work they are preferable. <S> If you go for option 3, the mentor will help you setting up the process.
| What worked for me was to teach my new team what I wanted them to do while also engaging them in evaluating and improving processes.
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My company wants everyone to obtain an IT certification in the next few months The situation is as follows: The company I'm currently working at has been providing for a couple years now a "certification reward". Being an IT company it obviously values having certified employees in different fields (web development, databases, SAP etc.) so it offers to repay the application fees after an employee passes any certification from their list of pre-approved ones. When you do it you additionality get a small salary raise (25-50 US$ in my countries' currency). Certifications however usually cost 200 US$ or upwards and require additional costs such as traveling, as I live in a big country with very few online test centers where you can take tests like these. Needless to say very few people can afford that (the average salary in the company is around 400 US$) so in our unit there's maybe 5 certified employees out of 100. As our market is very aggressive and the company wants to differentiate itself, management now decided everyone needs to have at least one certification. Meetings were called to make the rules clear and the deadline is 4 months from now (2 months for team leaders). Some don't even have a choice as to which certification to pursue, and are facing the idea of paying, for example, 1000 US$ now to take the Zend certification because they were hired to work with PHP. They will only get the application fees back when they pass, remember. It was explicitly said that trainees won't be hired unless they do it, and it was heavily implied, although management couldn't say it out loud due to strict workplace regulations in the country, that those without certifications after the deadline will be undesirable for the company. It is a company with more than a thousand employees, and it's no stranger to massive layoffs. How to react in a situation like that? Is it even appropriate what they're doing? <Q> My guess is that most people won't be able to do it, and the bosses will have to decide between mass layoff (I doubt they can find certified replacements) and coming up with a more reasonable way to get people certified. <S> All that is really needed is a certified examiner, a secure room, and an internet connection for online certification tests. <S> The company would be better advised to get one of these people in for a few days. <S> So if you can't afford to do what you're asked to do, then don't worry too much, most other people there probably can't afford it either, and I doubt certified human resources are actually that easily available for the company to get rid of everyone. <S> If you can afford to do it, then do so <S> , it's an investment in your career which the company will partially reimburse you for and which you can use anywhere. <S> The certification belongs to you, not the company. <A> I think in general you'll have to get the certifications. <S> If there's no choice but to travel, I'd talk to your manager and explain the cost to travel is not something you can absorb, and see if they will pay for it. <S> A reasonable employer will work with you to figure this out. <S> You don't give your country, but I believe this would be ok in the USA, even if you had to pay for everything yourself. <S> The job now requires this certification, so you'll have to get it or be terminated, if that's what you're being told. <A> I have two points on this, one from a german perspective, and some advice. <S> In my country, this would be highly illegal and impossible to enforce. <S> Your countries labor laws may vary, drasticly. <S> In the US, for instance, your employer would mostly be well in their rights to sack you for any reason, or no reason. <S> Now, for some advice: Take advantage of this as much as you can. <S> It may seem counterintuitive, but the fact that they will reimburse certification costs are amazing for you, and you should strive to afford as many useful certifications as you can. <S> Its going to make you not only more valueable for this particular company, but also for the next. <S> Thats a great chance to move up the ladder and earn more. <A> Adding to other answers, since the company wants you to get the certificates, you could suggest to your management that even if they don't want to pay for travel etc. <S> they could give out loans to those who want to certify and cannot afford that, and then keep pay rises due to certification back to pay for the loan. <S> So instead of finding $400 in your empty pocket, getting the certificate, getting a $25 rise, the company would lend you the $400 (possibly pay for tickets etc. <S> directly to avoid being ripped off), you get your $25 rise, but you don't see any of that money until after 16 months when the $400 is paid back. <S> And it's not uncommon to have a deal where the employer pays everything, and the employee signs to stay with the company for a certain time.
| You can't do anything like that, lest the company pay for all of it, in advance, without contingencies.
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Should you use email tracking with your employer? There are several plugins for email services like Gmail that can track emails you send and notify you when it has been opened/viewed by a recipient. I am tempted to use it with my employer/HR in order to know if delays in response are due to them ignoring me, or simply not having opened the mail yet (and might need a reminder). The problem is that these trackers themselves can be detected and I'm not sure what employers think of this. <Q> Whatever your problem is, it is not solved by knowing whether HR opened your email. <S> Really, there is no difference between HR ignoring your email by not opening it, or opening it and then doing nothing. <S> Knowing which of these scenarios is occuring doesn't better equip you for a response. <S> If someone hasn't responded in a reasonable amount of time, a reminder is appropriate, whether the email has been opened or not. <S> Furthermore, trying to track/monitor others' actions rather than trusting co-workers to do their jobs will be seen as adversarial and suspicious behavior. <S> If discovered, this would look bad. <S> Note: I assume you refer to something like hidden pixel email tracking. <S> Email receipt functionality such as that found in Outlook is fairly innocuous and probably not going to cause concern if you use it... <S> but I still don't really find it useful, for the reasons given here. <A> Ethical questions aside, I think such tracking is of very little use. <S> If the person you're trying to contact has configured their email client to automatically retrieve remote content , you'll get a notification as soon as they have opened the client, without reading your e-mail. <S> On the other side, if they have checked an option to always ignore remote content , you'll never get a notification. <S> Personally, I wouldn't get angry at you if you send me a message with tracking pixels, but since I block remote content in e-mails, you wouldn't get your notification. <A> Email tracking is largely useless. <S> Some people even mark all emails as read and then have their own priority system using folders. <S> Some people might open a mail but don't get to read it because they're getting called away for a meeting or anything. <S> Its not very useful information, and you shouldn't waste your time doing it. <S> This is all without going into if you're even allowed to have that information legally, which is off topic here but certainly not clear cut for all over the world. <A> Is email tracking illegal <S> No, it is not . <S> But, I would consider it a bit <S> unethical(having said that, I use it anyway) if used without the recipient's permission. <S> If you think that having the tracker would make them uncomfortable, then maybe you shouldn't use it. <S> When it comes to professionalism, then: If you are unsure about something, then the answer is always a NO . <S> You can always walk up to their table or send a reminder email when you didn't get a prompt answer or have a feeling that they are ignoring you. <S> Some people sort emails according to priority and answer them accordingly, so maybe they are not really ignoring you.
| In short, don't do it . Besides the risk that someone could see that you're doing it and see it as a red flag against you (or merely that you're impatient), several email access systems also don't work well with it.
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Changing main programming language/lane due to lack of job I'm a junior developer. So far i've been trying to work and stacking up knowledge based on C# used platforms (os, cross platform, game dev, n-tier arch, design patterns, frameworks...).And i'm struggling with lack of job/pro people. Recently I might have had a chance to work at a place that mainly uses PHP.So should i change my lane (I have knowledge about html, css, php; can build up dynamic web site from scratch, but nothing serious) ? I know sticking to a language is risky.But at this point, thinking the time/being juni/struggle to whole new things, fear of failure and so on. Do you think that it worth? Time is ticking, need job and money, already waiting for a while. Thanks so much already. <Q> I'd reassure you: being able to control more than one stack / language, is an invaluable asset in the long run. <S> Technology changes at such a pace that nobody can guarantee you'll still develop in X after 2,3 or 5 years. <S> Moreover, learning different syntaxes / paradigms will broaden your knowledge and potentially increase your ability to solve problems. <S> The question, as you put it as well, given equally valuable stacks (both PHP and .NET are) is not much about the technology but more about the working environment, finding good mentors or people experienced enough to work with, and the possibility to work on challenging projects. <S> Try to choose a stack that both gives some opportunity to find a job <S> and you like enough and go for it! <A> You're not that far down the C# path. <S> I do think C# is a better career choice than php. <S> But, contrary to popular belief, programming skills are mostly language agnostic. <S> Once you have your php skills on order, go back and practice C# in your own time, then look for a C# gig. <S> I find it interesting that you've been revising C# knowledge? <S> Perhaps this is why you think none of it transfers to PHP. <S> Focus on core skills, practice and write your own projects instead. <S> Personal point: I worked in Javascript for a year before getting a C# job <S> and I absolutely count it as a valuable part of my Software Development experience. <A> Over the course of about 25 years as a professional software developer, I've written software in C, C++, Java, Rexx, Visual Basic, COBOL, Perl, Python, C#, LISP, JavaScript, HTML/CSS, PHP, M68K ASM, Obj-C, Swift, IDEAL and Easytrieve. <S> I've written web-based applications (client and server), desktop applications, command-line applications, embedded applications, spreadsheet macros, mainframe applications, mobile applications, utility scripts and code generators. <S> I've worked in Windows, Linux, OS X, iOS, DOS, Solaris, HPUX, DGUX, Xenix, DEOS and MVS, in Education, Finance/Accounting, Telecommunications, Financial Transaction Payments, Auto Parts Retail, Avionics and Energy. <S> I am not trying to be boastful. <S> There are many software developers who have had similar experiences. <S> We have had long and happy careers creating things, solving problems, connecting things, helping people do their jobs better. <S> The languages, operating systems, frameworks and libraries were all just tools to get the job done. <S> I attribute my long and happy career to a desire to learn all I can, to try new things, and to find the best tools for the job, and the best ways to use them, whatever they might be. <S> I have prioritized having work over working in a particular language/platform. <S> Limiting yourself to one platform/language will soon limit your opportunities, which I believe is what you are now starting to experience. <S> If I were in your position, I'd take the PHP job and do my best to learn it like a pro. <S> It can only make you better and more marketable to have both .NET <S> and PHP experience. <S> What will make you successful is learning and applying good software design principles and implementing them in the languages and platforms that make the most sense at the time, working with other talented people and learning from them. <A> If you really need the money go and try for an service desk job. <S> Haveing knowlegde of codeing often boosts your chances in getting Jobs like that. <S> Now you might not want or even get such a job, but not trying will not improve your situation. <S> PHP is in my opinion, mainly about useing opensource frameworks now a days and will require experience with a framework such as wordpress. <S> So I doubt switching to PHP will do you much good right of the bat.
| The most important thing you can do for your job prospects and your skills is to get a job developing.
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Potential start up project failed, how do I put it on my CV? I have spent the last 2 years working on a social media mobile app with my business partner who is the CTO. Together we've developed an API, backend, and developed a mobile app. I developed the mobile app, he developed the back end and API. After doing two rounds of beta testing, it hasn't quite taken off how we expected, just less than half liked the product and my CTO has informed me today that he would like to step down. The product I feel however has potential and can be improved based on the feedback we have got, but since we do not have a lot of money, we are finding it hard to improve it and are both not in a position to quit our day jobs to do it. Since this was not a start up in the sense that we had employees i.e. just two of us. How should I write about this on my CV as a project or a start up? Also, I might continue working on the project sometime in the future, so I am a bit cagey about putting it on my CV in case someone else does it. Do you think that it is a good idea? I am currently in full time employment <Q> Don't put it on your CV: <S> Just to make the obvious point. <S> It doesn't provide great evidence of your skills. <S> Of course even if the project has failed (so far) you might have applied great development skills on it. <S> But the problem is that there is no evidence for the employer to see this, since the product hasn't been released. <S> It's not a necessary part of your career history . <S> If you worked on this full time for two years, you would need to put it on your CV to explain that part of your work history. <S> But since it was a side project and you were otherwise employed, leaving it off doesn't raise any questions. <S> It will make potential employers worry about what your next side project is going to be. <S> They want to hire someone who is committed to and passionate about their work , not your pet project on the side. <S> So mentioning that you worked on a significant personal development project while employed may be a red flag. <A> My 2 cents: <S> Don't Bother <S> The purpose of the CV is to get a job, and you aren't looking for a job. <S> In addition, listing the project might be detrimental to getting a job. <S> Some enlightened hiring manager's might appreciate this type of work, but more often it is not helpful for getting a job because: Failed , and Side-Project implies "not real experience" (non-sense for other entrepreneur types, but hiring managers are usually not entrepreneurs) <S> Not Dedicated to Your Employer - because you've shown you will work on side projects outside work <S> Flight Risk - if your side project continues and takes off. <A> To provide a dissenting opinion here: Since you're fully employed now, it's optional. <S> IF you want to list it <S> : List your work on the project, but don't call it "failed" because it hasn't. <S> That's a failure in marketing, not design. <S> You list what you did, what features you implemented, any coding tricks you pulled off, various CAR bullet points (Challenge, action, result), and if anyone asks, it hasn't failed, it's "pre-release" or in "beta testing". <S> You don't have to go into detail about what it is, so <S> there is no need to be "Cagey" about it. <S> In fact, resumes/CVs are not for detail anyway, <S> it's to get the interview. <S> If you don't want to list it, your Full-time job should be enough. <S> Again, like everything on your resume, you only list it if it helps.
| A failed project is something that doesn't do what it should be doing, and not a lack of interest in it. You don't want to emphasize things that failed on your CV.
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Going back to a potential employer after turning his offer down 45 days ago I have been founding and working on my start-up for a year now. In April (~45 days ago), a potential employer from California approached me with an interesting lead position. We exchanged a few messages, I did express a genuine interest but I informed him that I was 100% committed and working hard on my start-up at the moment. The start-up failed and for reasons outside of my control: the key founders of the project decided to back-off from the start-up. The job offered from the employer in California was a difficult position to fill, and may still be open. I would like to get back quickly to that employer but I'm concerned that I may appear desperate As a potential employer, how you would react to someone declining an interview who then reached out to you at a later date? What approach(es) would you recommend to someone in my situation? <Q> Go for it. <S> Be open and clear about the change in circumstances. <S> Explain why you said no the first time and why you are suddenly available. <S> Go directly to the hiring manager (if you can) to minimize the risk that it gets snagged in HR. <S> Phone call preferred, but e-mail can do too. <S> Something like Hi XXX. <S> Previously we talked about a lead position on your team. <S> I was very excited about the opportunity but at the time had a commitment to my start up that I couldn't break. <S> However, my availability has opened up following changes in financial commitments from original investing parties. <S> I am still really interested in exploring the position we have discussed or perhaps something similar within your organization. <S> I'd be delighted to discuss this with you in person. <A> At worst they wont be hiring and at best <S> you end up with a job! <A> You should go for it. <S> Don't worry that your change of heart seems desperate. <S> To the employer <S> it may as well seem you were committed until the very end - and didn't jump ship at a time that surely would have been disastrous for the start-up.
| There is never anything to be lost by reaching back out to the prospective employer and explain that your situation has changed if they still had any positions available.
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Is it ok to play games in office pc? I have installed a computer game on my office machine. After the working hours, I am playing games. Is this ethically ok? Or am I misusing my freedom in my workplace? <Q> Your company owns the machine, the software running on it, and has the right to read every file on it. <S> They could legally keep track of every key you push, even so far as storing your personal passwords if you input them on your work machine - most places <S> don't , but they could . <S> By installing software they're not aware of you're opening the door to potential security threats, or legal liability <S> (is the game pirated, for example?) <S> Furthermore, it's a game. <S> Most employers will take a very dim view of their employees using their work machines to run video games. <S> Now, you may work for a very informal, or friendly sort of person who OK's this sort of thing, but the fact that you're asking this question makes me believe that you've done this behind your boss's back, which is never a good idea. <A> In situations like this, I find the best rule of thumb is "Am I asking an anonymous internet community or my line manager for clarification of whether is this okay"... <S> More seriously, unless you have a job where you are simply required to be in your place of work for periods of time in case something happens (like a night guard or something), then you are using work's resources to play computer games. <S> Unless you've explicitly been told that's okay, it probably isn't. <S> Go ask your manager. <A> The phrase "wrong on so many levels" comes to mind. <S> A place I worked for would fire you for attaching a smart phone to your machine to charge. <S> Get the game off ASAP and hope they don't already know. <S> It's misuse of company property <S> It's introducing unauthorized software to a company machine <S> It's a breach of trust between you and your manager <S> It's a security risk <S> It's setting yourself up to be terminated for any of the above reasons. <S> Plus, it just plain looks bad. <S> There's a game on your system. <S> Now PROVE you haven't been playing it on company time. <S> You can't. <S> That, my friend is a problem. <S> When I've been management, I've actually been pretty forgiving about such things, but I'm the exception, not the rule. <S> Most employers will assume you've just been slacking. <S> Now, even if you've been doing it after work, you are still using company property in an unauthorized fashion. <S> There is no way you look good in this matter. <S> Get a smart phone and play games on that. <S> Keep the company equipment clean.
| In most workplaces this would be a big no-no, and probably a terminable offense if you were to be found out.
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Can I claim my anonymous blog on my resume? I am considering starting an anonymous technical blog. I do not want to use my real name or picture online. If I have such a blog, can I still claim it on my resume when I apply for a job? If yes, how to do it the right way? Note: The primary reason for the blog is not to make myself more marketable. It is simply to share information with others. I do, however want to use it as a marketing tool to potential employers when applicable. <Q> Yes, you can. <S> You can simply claim it as your "Pen name." <S> Also - getting harassed and threatened for having your own opinion isn't necessarily endemic to your gender. <S> We've all gotten it at one point or another. <A> You can, but I wouldn't recommend it. <S> Women already have it rough in the tech field (in many places) and you need to consider how this could be perceived. <S> Having an anonymous blog because of harassment could be perceived that you're afraid of criticism or that you're weak. <S> Women already have the (incorrect) stereotype of being overly emotional and weakness. <S> That's why a man is called assertive and a woman is called a bitch. <S> It's the common double standard. <S> There is a compromise between anonymous and fully public. <S> Your id is c_maker <S> so I'm going to make up a fake name based on that. <S> If you're name were Christine Maker, you could start a blog authored by Christine Maker. <S> You could also it GirlEngineer. <S> There's a third alternative. <S> You could put yourself as the author as Christine M. <S> What that does is make it easily identifiable in that you can say that it's yours and any employer will make the connection when they look it up. <S> Also, it's not completely anonymous <S> so there's no possibility of being perceived as actually afraid. <S> But here is my unbridled honest opinion. <S> Own it. <S> Put your name and take the lumps. <S> And when someone challenges you, you nail them to the wall because you know you're right. <S> You're strong enough. <S> Don't let anyone make you feel like you have to hide. <S> And if the comments get too vulgar or become personal attacks, remember, it's your blog and your house. <S> Delete them. <S> (I want to be perfectly clear that my characterization of stereotypes of women are not my own opinions nor do I want to suggest that it's ok. <S> Unfortunately they do exist and unfortunately, women also have to deal with them. <S> I happen to love strong women and married one.) <A> If you decide to call it out on your resume, consider well what types of company culture you will be applying into. <S> And that it will become common knowledge not just to your supervisor but probably all your coworkers if you work there. <S> I know in some industries outside projects are looked upon pretty favorably. <S> But in traditional industries it could be seen as very negative, not that outside/related hobbies are problematic, but that it's considered more of a social media / timewaster. <S> I know a lot of folks on here would be shocked that their boss/coworkers might not even know what a blog is <S> but I'm very serious, in some industries it could be seen as negative or even amateurish. <A> Yes, you can.
| If it's for an IT related career you can easily provide proof with various forms of cryptographic tokens, for example by putting a bcrypt hash of your full name plus a salt on the website. I would not put an anonymous blog on a CV without proof, because if the employer already suspects other entries to be made up for any reason, claiming an anonymous blog as your own will only increase their suspicions.
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I told a supervisor that I'm seeing a psychologist. What repercussions should I expect and how should I handle them? I've been seeing a psychologist once a week for over a year now and it's only occasionally directly interfered with my ability to get work done. However, there are some days where there will be a non-critical meeting that runs late and I have to leave and normally, when asked my reason for leaving, I simply say that "I have an appointment" or "a medical appointment". There was one instance where I knew a meeting was going to go very late, and so I messaged the same supervisor letting them know I had an "important personal appointment that I don't feel comfortable discussing in front of or with others" and would need to leave at a certain time, which they said was fine. However the work schedule has been brutal these past few months (most weeks have been 65+ hour weeks for more than two months) and I feel that my productivity has come under a lot of scrutiny as stress-levels rise and hard deadlines approach. As I had a psychology appointment today, I decided to work from home (a highly-frequent occurrence across all teams at my workplace) so I could just get to working and not deal with wasting commuting time. A set of problems that I had been working on the previous day and night, and was causing delays for others, had reared its head again this morning, so I was asked by one of my supervisors (a higher up) what my appointment was for and when, so we could review my work and get it cleared up. It wasn't asked in any particularly striking way (also it was over IM). I didn't have a lot of time to think of an answer, and I knew I'd need to reply with something more informative, so I simply said "a psychologist appointment" and the time. The supervisor's response didn't seem too fazed or anything, but it did leave me immediately feeling worried that I should have handled it differently, and that this will have adverse effects on my job. I know that I'm within my legal rights to not tell my employer anything about my health that I'm not comfortable telling, but I did feel somewhat obligated to tell, both as a team member and, to be blunt, as one of the consistent bottlenecks of this project. Please advise; any and all help is much appreciated. <Q> Let it go. <S> You've got enough to be concerned with as-is. <S> 65-hour work week? <S> If you feel this is normal and acceptable, then you might want to put more effort into pleasing and comforting and nurturing yourself and let the job be what it's gonna be. <S> Worrying about what your boss will say == ANXIETY. <S> It will shorten your life span! <S> Make your way back to sanity, one step at a time. <S> Best of luck. <A> You can't "unsay" anything so what happens, happens. <S> I would have said "doctor's appointment" though. <S> That's my go-to answer if I have to be off for something like that. <S> Don't just say "appointment" though because they might think you're looking for work. <S> In the States we have the Americans with Disability Act (ADA) which prevents employers from asking medical questions except as related to the job at hand. <S> For instance, if I was taking a sedative and was a machine operator, they obviously would have a right to know. <S> In my personal case, I do typically tell them (after I've worked there a bit) that I'm diagnosed ADD if I happen to forget my medicine one day. <S> There's potential for negative opinions <S> but I've never had anything happen. <S> Typically I say, "If I seem more distractable or excitable today, I apologize. <S> I have ADD <S> and I forgot my medicine this morning. <S> " <S> It's no big deal. <S> I just want them to understand that there's a reason why I keep interrupting them and bounce from subject to subject. <S> The bottom line though is that it's nobody's business but mine. <S> If it's advantageous to tell them (such as my wife's recent hospitalization causing me to have to work from home more) then I will. <S> Remember though that a lot of people simply don't want to hear about personal problems. <S> And with mental health issues, it could make some uncomfortable. <S> Just bear that in mind going forward. <A> This is the exact reason why the medical information should be withhold from management at workplace. <S> Regardless what you do from now on, that supervisor will look at you and think, " (s)he has mental problem ". <S> And in the long run, if it comes down to letting someone with your skill set go <S> and you are up against someone who do not have a psych problem or did not disclose, that someone will have the upper hand, even though dismissal on any health condition grounds is illegal. <S> They can make up any reason why you were being let go. <S> On the other hand, being secretive about your appointments will raise the ire of your supervisors, especially the workload is as insane as where you work. <S> Which brings me to another aspect: Your management should have a little more foresight and staff your project/department more considerately, instead of slave-driving you and your colleagues, working 65 hours long work weeks. <S> Your picture wreaks bad management all over unfortunately. <S> But from now on, be on the lookout for tell-tale signs of how this supervisor treats you, compared to how he/she did, up until now.
| As a matter of practice though, I avoid telling employers anything about my health (especially mental health) unless it affects my job.
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Can I be sued for leaving with proper notice in the UK? I currently work at a small company but have been very unhappy for a long time. As a result, I have accepted a job offer at another place. I handed my notice in yesterday but my current employer said the company will likely fold if I leave. I felt bad but I've already signed the new contract so my hands are tied. Can he sue me if that happens? I intend to work my notice period and do everything in my power to help the company survive (even work a few hours a week unpaid after I leave). <Q> No he cannot. <S> You are just an employee and they come and go. <S> Your only responsibility is to comply with your contract. <S> As long as you work the correct notice as defined in your contract you are fulfilling your responsibilities towards this company. <S> As an aside, I would not work unpaid to help them after you have left. <S> That cannot end well and may even prejudice your new employer against you if they found out (particularly if they are competitors). <A> If the company folds because a single employee leaves, that's entirely the fault of the manager . <S> Don't let him talk you into any guilt that's his. <S> Well, the fact that he tries it, shows us why you want to leave, though... congrats to your decision and your new job. <S> If I were you, I would not help them after the notice period, with anything that takes more than five minutes (explaining where to find something is ok, coding for them is not). <A> If your contract says you can leave at any time, you can with no obligations.
| If your contract states that you can leave after a certain notice period, then handing in your resignation and moving on after serving the notice period is entirely legal. Unless you have deliberately tried to destroy the business, there is no reason why you could be sued.
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Should I bother to reply to emails from recruiters when I'm already employed? Every now and then I get an email from a recruiter with a position they want to offer me. These emails are normally offering jobs outside my area of expertise and asking for skills I simply don't have. Not just that but I'm already employed in a job I'm quite happy in. <Q> Typically, you can ignore recruiters who: email you about a job that is far out of your area/experience seem like they haven't done their homework on you appear to be spamming anyone who matches keywords on LinkedIn or a job site Ignoring these will not harm you, as they probably already forgot that they emailed you. <S> The good recruiters, however, actually do their homework and email you about jobs that are tailored quite closely to what you do. <S> They are probably attempting to actually find the best fit, rather than rely on spam. <S> Replying to good recruiters can't hurt, since they may be a reliable asset down the line. <A> As a recent jobseeker completing a graduate degree and receiving many of these emails, I will say that most of these can be ignored for reasons already discussed. <S> I am a PhD scientist and receive recruiting emails for door-to-door sales, bachelor's level lab technician work, and call-center positions. <S> Frankly, these solicitations are not only irrelevant, but insulting. <S> No reply warranted. <S> If they understand your experience, background, or were referred to you by a mutual colleague, it is worthwhile to reply and start a dialogue whether or not you are happily employed. <S> You might know someone else who might fit the recruiter's needs and build a connection that way so that you might leverage that connection in the future. <A> I get emails from recruiters all the time. <S> Many times they have nothing to do with my skill set or my physical location 1 . <S> My experience is that these emails are being generated by low level recruiters using shotgun approach 2 . <S> They send out bulk emails and hope that someone would actually fit their requirements (and also not complain when being low-balled on renumeration) <S> I also consider that recruiters who take this approach don't really care about you as a client but instead only care about counting up resumes that they can send to the company and thus maximize their own income. <S> As such I suggest that you form relationships with recruiters in your own physical area with who you can easy meet and can trust. <S> 1. <S> I develop software for industrial processes. <S> I once had a string of emails suggesting that I was the perfect Insurance salesman. <S> I never could figure that one out. <S> I also get lots of emails suggesting that I am a perfect web developer - nothing of which is indicated on my resume. <S> 2. <S> I once had two people from the same recruiter send me the same details about a single job (in this case the job was interesting to me and in my field). <S> These two actually sat across from one another in the same office. <A> You should reply if you want to receive endless recruiter emails since by replying you identify yourself as a "live prospect" and your contact information will end up in countless databases where it will be shared and even sold. <S> When you are looking for a job, if you decide to use a recruiter you want to be choose one based on recommendations from trusted colleagues in your field and on your own search criteria. <S> Letting the recruiter choose you is not in your best interests. <S> Cheers! <A> I have never found a job that I got hired through a 3rd party recruiter. <S> Most times the job was severely outside the scope of my skillsets or the recruiter would lie and when I went to the interview it was something completely different. <S> I've had very good luck just applying directly to positions. <S> Just ask if they are a third party recruiter. <S> If they answer NO, then ask them if they work directly for the HR firm for the company you would be working in if hired. <S> Even getting straight answers from these sleaze balls is hard. <A> You well receive many, many email automatically. <S> If you don't reply, nobody cares. <S> Nobody loses anything or wastes any time. <S> If you reply that you don't want that position offered, you waste your time, and you waste the time of the recruiter. <A> I recommend: sending a quick canned reply explaining what areas you are interested in keeping a list of all recruiters who contact you for what type of job on a text file. <S> Never know when you might be out looking for a job again, and the list might come in handy. <A> There are a lot of spam recruiters out there who just send out mass emails to everyone they've seen a resume for without bothering to check if they might actually be qualified. <S> Some of the more obvious flags are they don't bother giving you the name of the company they are recruiting for (usually means they are a recruiting firm that knows they aren't a critical part of the recruiting process and is afraid you will go behind their back), they just list a few generic skills without describing the actual job (might mean there is no actual job <S> , they are just trying to rope you into a conversation), your skills are completely inappropriate for the job (means they haven't done their homework), or sometimes even leaves parts of the template in the email (literally reading "Dear "). <S> If they are just emails, they are easy to deal with by flagging them as spam. <S> Such recruiters aren't useful as contacts if you really are looking for a job. <S> It gets really annoying when they also call you on the phone, especially during working hours...
| However, for recruiters with legitimate interest in you as candidate, it is worth replying in order to open up a potential networking opportunity . I ignore them totally.
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How to figure out during the interview whether the company is open to self-learning on the job? For people working in technical fields (statistics, programming, etc.) it's important to devote time towards self-improvement. In theory, a continuously improving work force should also benefit the business, but the reward is often not immediate and hard to demonstrate to the management. Thus, I find that it's much easier to have a boss that's sympathetic towards self-learning on the job rather than try to convince a skeptic. During the interview, how to figure out whether the boss will be open to self-learning on the job (not just at home)? Asking point blank probably won't be effective, since no one would say "No, we do not support employees' learning and improvement." <Q> I'd recommend something open-ended: "How do people learn around here?"Then <S> wait and see whether they mention a training budget (in terms of money or x% of your time), sending people to conferences, or a library, or one of your interviewers spontaneously telling about a training he just attended or a book he just read. <S> Was it classroom, virtual, textbook? <S> How did he hear about it? <S> How was it approved? <S> Was it internal or external? <S> How typical was his experience? <S> Or just ask how someone with your job description would typically spend his day and see whether they naturally mention learning. <S> If they don't, well... you can always ask whether they just forgot it. <S> Plus, ask to walk around in your prospective office and keep your eyes open. <S> Any textbooks lying around? <S> Conference posters? <S> Anything else learning-related? <A> Ask a whole series of questions: <S> If the solution to a problem is best implemented using a new technology would you support your developer learning that new technology? <S> Do you guys sometimes adopt new technologies which have the potential to be useful? <S> Do you encourage employees to learn these technologies, and offer them the opportunity to research new techniques while on the clock? <S> They might have a canned answer to one, but not all of them. <S> You'll be able to ascertain their opinion on the matter. <S> That being said, also use common sense: <S> Does the job require you to deliver results within a very set amount of time? <S> Does your work impact many customers/users, and require very careful vetting before release? <S> If yes, then most likely the company will try to stick with well-proven, familiar technologies, and demand fast fixes, and lots of testing. <S> In a company where the applications you're developing are for internal use, etc. <S> you might get a lot more freedom in how you implement them. <A> Discuss this when you "meet the team". <S> When you discuss with them any tools or technology ask them about where and how they learned them. <S> If a "meet the team" is not openly offered definitely seek the opportunity out. <A> I usually like to be honest about how I use my work time. <S> I always tell future employers that I love to learn and that I can often be found with a youtube video about a subject on one screen and my daily busy work on the other. <S> I make it clear this wont affect my ability to get my job done but rather helps me learn new skills and refine existing ones I feel are an asset. <S> Then I'll ask if they have additional ways to help me reach future goals at the company such as tuition reimbursement or training credits. <A> Find employees who work there and ask them. <S> You might meet some during the day, and beside that they're super easy to find on LinkedIn.
| Or take a "commitment to learning" as given and ask your interviewer directly about his or her last learning experience.
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Is it reasonable to ask for a week to consider a job offer? I recently interviewed for a position, and was verbally offered the job. The job involved relocation, and the salary offer wasn't as lucrative as I would have liked, so I asked for them to send through the written contract, and give me a week to crunch the numbers and make a decision. They didn't immediately send through a contract, and I followed up a couple of days later. Eventually the CEO got back to me and rescinded the offer telling me: Your request to take a week to consider the offer was not a good start and left me in doubt. I've made the offer to another candidate. Now - let's be clear - I had intended to use this week to wait to hear back from other positions I'd applied for. Is this dynamic standard employment game theory and par for the course, is it more indicative of a dysfunctional company culture? <Q> Most formal offers that I've received have come with a week to make a decision. <S> I would consider this normal, especially if relocation is involved and the offer is the first time you are seeing the complete compensation package in writing. <S> Even jobs that were local to me tended to give me at least several days to consider them and respond. <S> I would consider a company that provided an offer and gave such a short timeframe for responding to be suspect. <S> I would be concerned that I would not have sufficient time to read all of the details of the offer, review the contracts and compensation package, and consider the effects of agreeing to the position. <S> I recognize that some companies may be on a tight timeline. <S> If they are, I would expect that they would be more upfront about coordinating with you on the timeline. <S> If they wanted a faster response, I would hope to receive at least drafts of any agreements that I would be expected to sign early to raise any questions or concerns before receiving the final offer. <A> It's certainly common enough. <S> Companies want enthusiastic people that are excited by the opportunity. <S> If someone asks for a week to consider, that generally means that they're either planning to use the offer just to get a counteroffer from their current employer or that they strongly prefer a different opportunity that they're interviewing for at the same time. <S> From the company's standpoint, if there are other potential candidates that are nearly as good, it generally makes sense to prefer the enthusiastic second choice to the unenthusiastic first choice. <S> That is particularly true when it is likely that the first choice is going to come back after a week and reject the offer because they got the counteroffer they were looking for or because they got the offer from their preferred employer and when it is likely that the second choice will have accepted another offer by the time the first choice rejects the offer. <S> Now, is a week really unreasonable? <S> The fact that the offer involved relocation certainly makes it more reasonable that you'd need some time to think it over. <S> Although theoretically it shouldn't matter, I'd wager that most companies would be willing to give more time to a candidate with a family and older kids that would need to relocate than to a single person. <S> If the company sought you out because you have a rare set of skills that they were interested in, that would generally make a longer time frame more reasonable than if you're actively applying to a job where there is likely to be a lot of competition and a lot of "close second" candidates. <A> is this dynamic standard employment game theory and par for the course, is it more indicative of a dysfunctional company culture? <S> It's not necessarily either of your two options. <S> It's possible that the hiring manager or CEO was playing a game. <S> But in my experience, managers/CEOs don't do that. <S> Most CEOs just want to hire the best candidate they can find that fits the need, budget, etc. <S> It's possible that the company culture is dysfunctional, but not necessarily. <S> You indicated that the offer wasn't as lucrative as you would have liked. <S> Or it's possible that their offer was already at the top of their range and they didn't want to negotiate. <S> You won't really know for sure the real reason. <S> But since they weren't offering what you wanted anyway, it's probably best to just move on. <S> Play the interactions back in your head and see if there is something you would do differently the next time something similar happens. <S> Perhaps not, or perhaps you might decide to adjust your approach and try to give off different vibes. <S> These things happen. <A> Asking for a full week is borderline. <S> Maybe you could have suggested you need a weekend to have enough time to consider the relocation? <S> Regardless, you and this company should have discussed when they needed your answer. <S> If they didn't have another candidate, they many have been willing to wait. <S> The fact that they were concerned about your request makes it look like there was a lack of communication during this negotiation. <S> Their delay in getting the offer should have been addressed. <S> Obviously they don't see hiring as a two-way street and feel they have the complete advantage. <S> Not all companies operate this way. <S> It is a sign in my opinion that they are not very professional in their hiring practices. <S> If getting an answer from you was so critical, they should have said, "We need to know in two days. <S> " They've obviously used this situation as an opportunity to hire someone else.
| It's quite possible that asking for the written contract, and asking for a week to "crunch the numbers and make a decision" came across as "high maintenance" to the folks you talked with, and helped them decide to move on to the next qualified candidate. Get things done when you say you will and make sure both parties are clear on what they want.
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How to react if a coworker pretends to have forgotten about my property but actually didn't? The case is the following. Over 6 months ago, a coworker required a USB stick for work related stuff but we hadn't one ready for use. By coincidence, I had a private one with me which had no data on it, and I intended to keep it. So I lent it to him and said it doesn't matter if he needs it for 1, 2 or 3 days. On multiple occasions, I asked for the stick and he pretended to have forgotten about it and it is at his home. As he has a Ph.D. and I was interested in his thesis which he wanted to give me, I told him (when he was pretending one more time he forgot about the stick), that there is no hurry, he can just put the PDF's onto the stick and give it me back then. (Which, of course, just was a pretense to recover my stick.) He evaded this for a few days just sending me his thesis by mail. After that, I forgot about it. But yesterday I was searching for some work related documents and didn't realize I was opening his private drawer of a cupboard. And there was my stick. I left my stick in there as picking it up would expose that someone was in his private stuff. But the main point is: How to react here? He obviously lied to me and kept my property into his possession. I know that when he is at work lays down some stuff (which is distracting for his work), into his drawer so he faces every working day my property well knowing that I asked multiple times for it (After clarifying via comments that this is important info: note the USB stick has a keysign attached to it, with a label that holds my name handwritten on it). I don't know why he could do this, as a 8 GB stick isn't that much of a value. And when I was thinking he really just forgot about it, I was assuming good faith and therefore had no problem by just letting it go. But now when I know he obviously lied to me, with the aim to keep my property in his possession, I feel like I should do something.But what? (escalating it to superiors is nothing I'm aiming for, while this is a pretty bad attitude on his part, it's still a good climate in the whole team.) note: I wasn't able to talk to him since this happened. So probably when I ask him the next time he will just remember that he brought it back to work again a few weeks ago, and just hadn't the opportunity to hand it over again. But for this post let's just assume I asked him after this and he just said he has it at home and will bring it me in the next few days. (What as I now know would be in that case a lie) <Q> Assume good faith. <S> It is far better to operate on the assumption that people are telling you the truth, unless you are absolutely certain that they are misleading you. <S> In this case, I see no reason to conlcude that he is lying. <S> Lying multiple times just to steal a cheap item, and then leaving it sitting in a drawer and not actually using it, doesn't make a lot of sense. <S> It is entirely plausible that he forgot where it was, or that it genuinely was at home when he said that, but he brought it to work later (and forgot to give it to you). <S> I was looking in this drawer-- <S> sorry, I was looking for my papers and didn't realize it had your personal stuff in it-- <S> and I think I saw my USB stick that I lent you awhile back. <S> Is this mine? <S> Because it would be great to have it back now. <S> Since the drawer is his private area, I wouldn't just take it. <S> But I wouldn't worry about admitting you looked in there--it was an honest mistake and not a big deal. <S> This will almost certainly resolve the situation. <S> In the unlikely event that it does not, I would simply buy a new USB stick (and of course, not lend anything to this person again). <S> It's a cheap item that is not worth creating a big conflict over. <A> As you have indicated, an 8GB USB memory stick is not worth spilling tears over. <S> Just chalk it up to experience. <S> For the 5 bucks you would spend for a replacement, and I am being overly expensive here , I know, you have learned not to trust this person with anything of value. <S> If you two keep working in the same environment, and he is not an always-prepared type person, I am pretty sure, he will come to you for borrowing other things as well. <S> Say one day he came to you and asked $250 because he didn't realize he parked his car on a time limited zone and it was towed and, surprise-surprise, he doesn't have that kind of money on him to recover his car from the pound. <S> At that point, mentally referring back to this USB stick incident, you will look at him and say, "Oh, I am sorry, I am fresh out of cash, I had to pay some bills this morning" even if you are capable of lending him this money. <S> Because you know, there is no chance that you can recoup your money at any reasonable amount of time, if you lent it to him. <A> But he has lied to you. <S> On multiple occasions he said it was at home. <S> If he knew it was at the office that is an out right lie. <S> So he thought it was at home. <S> When he did not find it at home he should have told you he lost it and bought a replacement. <S> You lent him an item and have asked for it back several times. <S> He should return it or replace it. <S> Be direct <S> It has been 6 months now <S> and I want my drive back.
| I would admit I saw the drive and ask for it back .
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What can I do about vulgar words at work? My job of 26 years just underwent a change of management. Language has become very vulgar. A month ago a manager called a subordinate person a cunt When addressed, the manager said that he was kidding, laughed at me, and walked away laughing. I said to him that it's not acceptable. I brought it to the store manager. The only feedback I got was the store manager saying that it's not good. Today, another manager and subordinate were publicly discussing a customer. This manager said, "Oh he is a Dick." I responded, "Enough of that language. Not acceptable." Upon ending her shift, she (the manager? Subordinate?) said, "That is fucking stupid." I told her, "That is not acceptable and please stop the language. The language is offending me and I don't like it." What should I do? <Q> I disagree with Morsor -- There are two issues here, though they are very related. <S> One is foul language. <S> The other is disrespect. <S> People have a lot of opinions about foul language, and I myself am of the opinion that they're just words and the offended party puts a lot of power behind them, not just the speaker. <S> HOWEVER -- vulgarity and disrespect/negativity often go hand in hand, and it seems the latter is the issue here. <S> Management should not be calling people names. <S> They should be doing their job - managing people. <S> Resorting to name-calling is easy, completely ineffective, and only creates divisions in the workplace (someone else agreeing or disagreeing that so-and-so is a ____.) <S> Management should also not be calling your simple request 'fucking stupid'. <S> This manager seems horrible at his job. <S> Perhaps address that instead? <S> Go to his boss and perhaps explain that he/she is being disrespectful to both employees and customers, is acting immature and not doing his job well, and so on. <A> If this problem only seems to bother you, there is probably not a lot to do. <S> You could talk to others at work and find out if many other people find it as offensive as you. <S> If it turns out you are not alone, you could get management involved. <S> However, I could imagine that management would be more concerned if the offensive language was overheard by customers. <S> If it's going on in a high-pace kitchen behind closed doors, they could perhaps just view that as 'normal'. <A> This is a company culture issue. <S> It sounds like the new management is successfully changing company culture. <S> Other than the first word, none of the other events would be that unusual to me at a prior place I worked that I would not describe as particularly toxic. <S> The answer depends on your ranking. <S> If all these managers are above your head and okay with it, and their managers are okay with it or don't care, don't expect anything to change. <S> You can ask people kindly to treat one another with respect, but if you simply call out their foul language they will not really change and might wonder why you are policing their words. <S> Curse words are just words afterall, right? <S> Is the issue really that someone uses the F-word, or that colleagues are disrespecting one another? <S> The next time someone says "that guy is a f-ing idiot" you could say "hey, I also disagree with his decision on this, but we don't need to personally insult him to criticize his ideas. <S> " If you call people out on language they will treat you like some out-of-touch old school marm. <S> At best maybe modify behavior in front of you, or worse possibly tease you and consider you old fashioned and inflexible. <S> You might find yourself excluded politically from this new culture. <S> In my experience, management cares only about not getting insulted themselves, and about getting the job done. <S> If Joe is a manager and screams and chews out his employees but he gets things done, he will be perceived as a success despite how much abuse or profanity he doles out. <S> If the culture up to upper management is to accept certain things, don't expect a complaining employee to change that. <S> There has to be valid business reasons for them to consider changing anything, and in my cynical experience even a bunch of unhappy and leaving employees will often not change this. <S> The ones who complain and leave are perceived as "bad eggs" and "good riddance to bad rubbish". <S> Especially if Joe "really gets things done." <A> You should be more upset that people are insulting the customers than what words they are using to insult them. <S> Insulting the customers is something that management can and should take action against. <S> You can report that if you wish. <S> Why? <S> Well tomorrow someone comes in and says that they are offended by a bunch of things you routinely say in passing when you're frustrated. <S> Do we ban all those words too? <S> Who gets to judge?
| Saying words that you in particular don't like is not something management should take action against.
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Should I tell the company voluntary that I wouldn't attend to interview if I had offer already? Suppose I have an offer in company A and company B asked me to interview before. Should I call company B voluntary that I wouldn't come to interview? Is it non ethical that doesn't attending to interview sliently? (I fear I will be blacklisted elsewhere!) Note: my question is different from Should I go to an interview I don't intend to accept the job (if offered)? : those question is about whether I should go to an unwanted interview, but in my situation, it assumes I already given up the unwanted interview, and I want to focus on the consequence of missing interview without noticing the company, instead of the value of unwanted interview <Q> Preparing an interview takes lots of work depending on the position, and you should respect their time enough to let them know. <S> In addition to that, you could be uneligible for hire at that company, or, as you said, even take a hit in your reputation in the industry overall. <S> That being said, you should generally only not attend the interview if you're absolutely certain you want to accept offer A, and have no further interest in even pursuing B. <S> They could end up making you a better offer. <A> If that offer from company A is in writing and has no contingencies, and there is nothing that company B could offer you that would make you not pick company A. <S> Then cancel the interview and tell them why: tell them you have decided to accept an offer from another company. <S> You don't need to tell them more than that. <S> But if all the conditions outlined in the first paragraph have not been met, then the fact that you have an offer from company A doesn't stop you from interviewing with company B; or applying to company C, D and E. A <S> few years ago I applied for several positions during the week that I had between the first offer that had contingencies and a low salary, and the eventual one I accepted that had zero contingencies and additional compensation. <A> You go to that interview at company B unless you have a written, irrevocable offer that you are going to accept, no matter what B would offer you. <S> So if all you have is a verbal offer, you go to the interview. <S> You know what offer they'd likely have to beat, so you can go there with little worries, show yourself in the best possible light, and try to get a better offer than the one you have. <S> If instead of having the attitude "I need to get a job" you have the attitude <S> "I'll try to get an offer that is better than A's offer", you may be able to achieve a lot more.
| You should definitely tell them if you plan to not attend the interview, not just out of fear from blacklisting, but just out of respect for their time.
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How to grow yourself when your task is not specific? I have been working on different tasks chosen by myself as a specific task is not allocated. I am free to choose tasks. Due to lack of a specific job task and needing to work on different tasks I find that I am not growing much or I don't know if I am growing very fast. So, how do I measure if I am growing? How do I grow myself when I need to handle different tasks and have no specific task? <Q> I am pretty sure your employer hired you for serving a specific purpose, unless you are hired for the man-friday position. <S> Why don't you go to the hiring manager and start a discussion with him/her, saying something like "I enjoy having the freedom of picking and choosing my tasks in my such-and-such years/months of employment with you, but I want to help our organization be more effective, by undertaking assignments which are crucial to the success of the team. <S> What do you think I can start working on?" <S> Every professional organization has goals. <S> Goals get divided unto smaller goals and the division goes down to the simplest of tasks to accomplish the goal. <S> It looks like you are stuck at the bottom of that totem pole. <S> You may want to broaden your point of view and instead of focusing of individual tasks, you may try to see the bigger picture and how those tasks you perform, come together for a greater purpose. <S> It will give you the insight about each task in the project plan as well as planning/managing the whole project. <S> This can easily catapult your career into a project management position with the technical expertise about the job you are performing. <S> Once you have few of such assignments and successful completions under your belt, you can write your own ticket, without worrying your professional development not being as fast as you hoped it would be. <S> Mainly because you will not have time to think about such minor details once you get into the big-picture world and there is a lot to learn that way. <A> First I'd talk to your boss/employer. <S> Get an idea of what their expectations are for the position and make sure you are meeting them. <S> Ask them what their expectations are for your future development. <S> Next, assuming they don't care about your future development or you feel you are already on track, start thinking about where you want to be in several years. <S> What skills do you want to develop? <S> Is the kind of work you're doing now at the company you work at now what you want to be doing in the future? <S> Create your own development plan. <S> Outline the skills and possibly any education you need to get you there. <S> If you think your boss would be open to it, go over the plan with them. <S> Maybe there are tasks within your company you can work on that will get you there, or possibly your employer is willing to pay for classes/books. <S> If you don't think they would open to it, or your ambitions are far beyond theirs, don't worry. <S> Just work on your own personal development plan as you can while getting your job done. <A> I would make an appointment with your employer and try to find out what (s)he would like you to do. <S> I understand that you have a lot of freedom in your work, but since they have to pay you he most likely does care what you do with your time. <S> Let him choose which ones he finds most interesting. <S> After this, set clear goals for each of your tasks and work towards them.
| Make a list of tasks that you would like to do and that are good for the company and propose them to your employer.
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Can I say I've worked with a client's client? Let's say I build software for Company A . Company A then licenses this software out to Company B and Company C . I have no NDAs in place. Companies B and C both know that I built this software. Occasionally, I might send and receive emails from someone working at Company C to support their use of the software (answering questions, adding features, etc.). To what capacity can I say I've "worked with" Companies B and C ? For example, would it be misrepresentative to put that I have worked with Company C on a portfolio or resume? I doubt there would be any legal repercussions, but just in case, I live and work in the UK and the software is hosted on UK-based servers. <Q> You did not work for Company B or C <S> I guess you could say worked with but a few emails in support of the software is pretty minor. <S> To me it would need to be a multi month full time engagement to list the name of the customer and then be clear <S> you were not a direct employee. <A> And should your prospective employer wants to check your credentials with companies B & C, it might backfire for you. <A> If it was a dedicated role to support these other companies directly through Company A, I would list it as: <S> Company A (MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> (For Company B MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> (For Company C MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> If you were on-site at these locations: <S> Company A (MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> (At Company B MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> If it was not a dedicated role to support these clients, I would leave it off. <A> Does all your software for Company A go either to Company B or C? <S> If it does then you are in a way <S> a contractor for companies B/C through company A. A line item on your resume might look like: Software Developer for ABC Employment Contracted to Big Company B <S> / Big Company C <S> You can look up further examples of how contractors list their positions. <S> If Companies B/C only make up some of who uses your software but not all of it, and your current employer provides other services to B & C or support your work in other ways, it might be more appropriate to list them in your responsibilities. <S> Developed XYZ Project for Company B. <S> Then go on in more detail on the project. <S> Include that you supported those companies. <S> Especially if Company B / C represent a particular industry niche that it might be useful to advertise you have experience in. <A> Your client's client is known as your End Client . <S> In the situation described above, Company B and Company C would both be defined as an end client. <S> If you work extensively with an end client for weeks or months at a time, then it is fair to list them as they pertain to a particular project, beneath your client: <S> Company A (MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> Developed code for Company B <S> (MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> Designed staging server for Company C <S> (MM/YY - MM/YY) <S> However, since neither Company A nor Company B are your direct clients, you cannot list them as such.
| It is not uncommon for support personnel at a company to work with various clients, and it would be deceiving to claim any working knowledge with them in a support role unless your role was dedicated to that client. You could say something like I supported Company B & C through Company A during the implementation and ongoing support of product/system_name_here, which gives you credit of what transpired to a certain extent but putting something like you worked with companies B & C would not be truthful. Demonstrating your support to clients of your current company is never a bad thing.
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How to quit a job after we agreed to an arrangement I've found similar questions here, but mine is a bit different, if not please correct me. Right now I presented a resignation letter where I stated that because of my university studies schedule I had to resign because time wasn't proper. I didn't talk to my boss or human resources deparment because some months earlier they told me policy was if they gave me hours for studying I should recover them on another day, but that wasn't possible because I required at least 8 hours permission, and that is a work day. Boss told me I should have talked to him before presenting him the resignation letter, and two days later they proposed to keep me employed discounting the hours I took from paycheck. After thinking about it, I agreed. It was fine but a week have passed and pressure is rising, because I have to rush on tasks to complete them with less hours at work. I want to present a new resignation but I don't know how to handle this, since they aren't proposing this arrangement to anybody else. <Q> So basically this company is bending over backwards to accommodate your study schedule, however you're finding that you simply don't have enough to time to both study and catch up on work hours/projects. <S> It is what it is. <S> As well meaning and open to compromise as your boss may be, it may simply not work out for you. <S> Be flattered and thankful that you've received such special treatment, however express that at this point in your life you need to focus on your school, and must move on. <S> If these people are mature they will understand that you're being honest and with them and not hold any grudges. <S> Unfortunately that's not always how these things work out however, so once you've made up your mind to go understand that you can't keep accepting new compromises, because people's patience is going to run out. <S> Now, from what you're telling us there seems to be some political undertones to your quitting, such as possibly making your boss look bad after he went to bat for you. <S> It makes me wonder if he is making these compromises for your sake, or for his own (maybe they really need your experience? <S> Who knows). <S> You should talk to him first and clearly/confidently express your situation. <S> Don't accept a middle ground, and don't compromise: you've done this already and it hasn't worked out. <S> You can't keep playing with people's expectations. <S> You want to avoid letting yourself be guilt-tripped back into a situation you're going to regret just a week down the line. <S> Whatever is said stick to your guns, hand in your notice, and be very thankful/polite. <A> Doesn't sound quite fair to me. <S> If they agreed to less hours per week and the commensurate reduction in pay, they should have expected less work per week. <S> This is something that should have been part of the discussion with your boss and HR when the accommodations were being made. <S> I would suggest that you discuss that with your manager and HR together. <S> Unfortunately, the fact that a new opening has been posted may mean your fate has already been sealed. <A> So you turned in your resignation letter. <S> Your boss offered to make accommodations to try to keep you, and you agreed. <S> So you stayed. <S> Now, you are finding that the accommodations are not working out as well as you hoped. <S> I hope that summarizes everything. <S> Go you your boss. <S> Tell him that you really appreciate them trying to work with you on your schooling and very much appreciate the accommodations they made, but that it isn't working out as you had hoped and that you would like to resign. <S> Bring with you another resignation letter. <S> There are many different ways your boss may respond. <S> He may become defensive, he may be understanding, he may make new promises, etc. <S> It would seem however, that even if new accommodations are to be made, it is very unlikely things will change. <S> So stand firm and put in the resignation. <S> You have already decided that school is higher priority. <S> You have tried to make it work. <S> It isn't working.
| Express yourself clearly, and present it as a decision you've made, so that he doesn't try to find more compromises which don't work out and end up disappointing everyone.
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Enforcing your own work hours when joining a new team I work at a large company in London as a software developer. The company doesn't really have work hour expectations than the usual 9-5 and most developers tend to vary how they work. Unfortunately I'm moving to a team where most developers work till late. There is no requirement from the application support point of view to do so but it seems this team's culture is to do this. I am one of those that doesn't really like to work long hours and am more productive that way than staying at work for ages which eventually wears me out. I feel that my options are: Work my short hours from day 1 and leave at 5ish as long as all my work is done. I am worried here my team will think that I am a slacker as they will see me head off earlier than them everyday. In the beginning work similar hours to my team but after a few months after I feel like I have contributed and am bringing value to the team then gradually reduce the hours I do to what I find acceptable for myself. My fear here is that once I've already started working late every day it will be difficult for me to go back to heading off at a decent time without my team feeling weird about it as opposed to if I did so from day 1. What are the likely outcomes of these two choices? Are there any options I have overlooked? EDIT: This I believe is not a duplicate of the one you posted as this is specifically to joining a new team and the right way to tackle this from the beginning whereas the linked one is asking for an existing team's manager expecting him/her to stay late. There is no expectation on my end other than everyone else in my team is doing it. <Q> I am worried here <S> my team will think that I am a slacker as they will see me head off earlier than them everyday. <S> If it's important to you to arrive around 9 and leave around 5, then do so. <S> And thus they may conclude that you are a "slacker". <S> But as long as you are getting your work done (assuming you have the kind of work that can be considered "done" each day), and are tackling your share of the overall work, then their opinions of you shouldn't hurt your standing with your boss. <S> In many shops, folks get to choose their hours based on their preferences, their lifestyle, etc. <S> It sounds like your shop is that way. <S> Alternatively, you set the pattern yourself and then have a conversation after a week or so and make sure that the hours you chose, and the pace you are setting are working out as you anticipate. <A> The best way to handle this is to talk to the supervisor of the team you are joining and ask if there is any particular reason why this team is working longer hours. <S> My guess is, it is the supervisor's expectancy that you put insane hours, in which case, whichever route you chose, you will be a slacker if you will only work 8 hours long days. <S> If you were happy with your working schedule at your previous position, why are you changing it, is my question to you, short of having substantially more money or closure of your old department, I do not see any upside to your positional move. <A> If you aren't the manager, you can't "enforce" anything. <S> You can negotiate, or try to do so. <S> You can be productive enough that people don't feel you're slacking. <S> You can ignore the expectations and take the consequences. <S> Or you can quit, or attempt to move into another group. <S> But that's the limit of your options. <S> Start by talking to your manager and understanding the real requirements of this job. <S> Then meet them. <S> Or don't.
| You may wish to informally "check in" with the boss before you set your work hours pattern and ask what kind of schedule is expected. You team may well observe that you are working fewer hours than their culture expects. Choose for yourself and don't worry about how others choose. Work my short hours from day 1 and leave at 5ish as long as all my work is done.
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Avoiding being put on new projects when about to quit? I just recently accepted a job offer from another company and that company is in the process of finishing off a few joining formalities (namely transferring my work visa). As per their legal department, that should take another week or so, post which I plan to give my two weeks notice and leave. My current manager has a lot of new projects whom he wants me to take up. The duration of these projects range from a month to several months. I would prefer not taking them up since that would require me to leave in the middle of the project which would be unprofessional in my opinion. What would be the best way to handle this situation without directly telling him that I am moving (Please note I do not wish to inform him until the visa transfer is done since my current company can block the visa transfer if they learn about me moving) <Q> You've looked at the situation logically and seen the solution, but rejected it for fear of appearing unprofessional. <S> I advise you to lay those fears aside when the alternative is losing your new opportunity, and possibly being left jobless. <S> In your own words: I do not wish to inform him until the visa transfer is done since my current company can block the visa transfer if they learn about me moving <S> This sounds like we're dealing with a hostile employer, not a reasonable party. <S> Maybe I'm misunderstanding, so I'll explain both possibilities: 1. <S> Reasonable Employer <S> You treat them honestly and ethically. <S> You inform them that you're about to leave <S> and it's only a matter of weeks, so handing you new projects is not a good idea. <S> Whatever your boss decides, you still abide by his/her decision (aka take it on anyway and try like heck to finish it) <S> If this doesn't sound like it would have a good outcome for you then <S> the degree of professionalism you're asking for is already no longer an option. <S> 2. <S> (Potentially) Hostile Employer <S> You play your cards close to your chest. <S> You inform no one of your plans, and act as if you are not at all planning to switch jobs (because, frankly, until the visa transfer is complete you <S> don't have another job). <S> This implies participating in meetings for new projects and acting as if you fully intend to take them on. <S> You could suggest that another person take one of these projects on if it seems like a logical choice, but otherwise maintain your cover in order not to jeopardize your new job. <A> As you more or less state yourself, your options are quite limited. <S> Join the new project, go to meetings - but do the work in a way that makes sense knowing that you will leave. <S> Most projects start with somewhat generic tasks. <S> If such tasks exist and you would be able to finish them, that could be the way to go. <S> Try to avoid tasks that require you spending time which will essentially be wasted when you leave. <S> You cannot control how the employer reacts to you giving notice - but you do have some control over your own 'legacy' at the company after you have left, by making your exit in a professional manner. <A> If you want to not let your current company know you're leaving before you're ready to tell them, you're going to need to continue to act like you're not, which means taking on a project. <S> I wouldn't tell them early, especially when something like a visa transfer hangs in the balance and can really screw things up for you. <S> Since you want to make the least impact when you leave, which is respectable, if there isn't a project you can finish in the ~3 weeks before your final day, getting on to the longest-term project will likely have the lowest impact. <S> As a manager would you rather lose 1 week on a 4 week project or a 16 week project? <A> What would you do if your company said it was planning to replace you, but the replacement worker has visa issues that may/may not work out and will take an undetermined amount of time to resolve? <S> In the meantime, your employer is going to stop paying your salary. <S> If and when the visa issues get successfully resolved, you will be formally fired. <S> If they fail to get the visa issues resolved, they will resume paying you (but no back pay) and act as if nothing happened. <S> This is essentially your situation reversed. <S> What would you do?
| Since your primary concern is finalizing the visa process with zero risk, you will have to keep completely silent until it has been resolved.
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Should I greet my boss when he is in middle of a conversation? This happens with me many times that I find my boss talking to my colleagues in door ways or in smoking zone and I am also going that way. Situation is that from what I see, he is not noticing me and continuing with his conversation, at this point should I greet my boss and disturb the conversation? <Q> Depends on culture, but I'd say don't disturb him. <A> What do others do? <S> It comes down to the culture at the company, which among numerous factors depends on country, business sector, company size, the age and personality of people - and other factors such as how close you are to the boss and the 'seriousness' of the conversation. <S> Another approach could be taking the opposite view: <S> What is the consequence of you NOT greeting the boss? <S> Would it be considered polite and non-interrupting or weird an unapproachable? <S> In a Danish context, I always greet when not doing so would seem weird. <A> if you make eye contact, Smile,thumbs up and continue onto where you're heading. <S> I have the same thing numerous times each day. <A> As you described it, it's a quite awkward situation, so just keep an eye on him while you get closer to him. <S> If he doesn't look at you, or seems too busy to talk to you, don't interrupt him, handshake or anything. <S> Just keep walking and say "hi" or "good morning" as you're passing by him. <S> This way if he hears you, he won't think you ignored him, and if he wants to talk with you, he will be the one who will have to call you. <S> If he sees you, depending on your culture, just smile and nod/wave him/ <S> whatever is a quick salutation
| If you make eye contact, do a smile and nod. If he doesn't hear you, at least you won't interrupt him and you won't risk looking impolite.
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Recruitment Consultant called me at work, on my company phone. Is this one unprofessional? I'm currently searching for opportunities. One can easily read that out of my XING account. Today a headhunter found me on XING, looked up my company's phone number, called our reception and asked for me. I had to exit that call, of course. We've arranged a phone call later that day.At first glance, this behavior looks unprofessional. Is this a red flag? Note: His call was initial. I've never heard of him or his company before. <Q> In all likelihood although you are looking, it won't be common knowledge at your current work, so calling you there risks exposure and maybe more. <S> Is this unprofessional? <S> Yes Is this common? <S> Unfortunately Yes Is this a red flag? <S> Not necessarily You'd be surprised how many recruiters do this, even when it means they need to work out/guess your work phone number/email <S> (they sometimes email as well), <S> I'm never sure if they just don't get it, or have such an impatience that they can't wait (or are trying to verify you really do work there), <S> but it happens. <S> I'd let them know how you feel about it, and proceed with caution with the recruiter, if they pull the stunt again <S> just DK them ("don't know who that is" when the call comes through). <S> I knew someone in the UK who interviewed at a large (American) bank, the offer fell through, so they took another job. <S> 6 weeks later bank had a change of mind, and recruiter (unsolicited) rang the new company to make the offer. <S> My friend got fired as he "obviously" wanted the other job more (even though he didn't instigate the conversation and ultimately told the recruiter where to go) <A> If he calls you on your work phone , then yes, it is a unprofessional, except if he has no other infos to reach you (mail, personal phone, etc...). <S> I would not raise the red flag for that, but the recruiter seems really hungry. <S> Double check any opportunity he might propose you <S> , he may be just a bit inexperienced, or just really interested in your profile. <S> As keshlam said, the problem might that may only be "cold calls" just trying to get you signed up rather than actually having a position that they are recruiting for. <S> If you are interested, tell them to call you back on your personal line and on your own time; if you aren't, tell them to go away. <S> In that way, I don't think it's unprofessional , especially if it was the initial call. <S> Sometimes, the recruiter will leave you a message on your phone, that did happen to me several times. <A> Really depends how the recruiter from XING approached it. <S> Prior to switching career paths i worked as a Recruiter for four years where calling potential candidates up at work was a fairly common occurance. <S> To clarify, this isn't a situation where i had a persons resume and was too impatient to wait until they got home to call them <S> this was more in situations where i was hired by a company to help them track down very specific niche candidates. <S> These conversations get initiated in workplaces only because this is often the only way to track down certain candidates - there may only be a few other companies who do the type of thing you need and it's just not practical to hope the resume passively finds its way into your lap. <S> Granted <S> this was a time before LinkedIn <S> so probably easier now. <S> As for the ethicality of it, the way it's approached makes a big difference on how ethicial it is. <S> When i first started doing it <S> i felt very dirty about it as i didn't really know what i was doing. <S> Putting somebody on the spot and their place of work with the impression of trying to "snatch them" away isn't terrific. <S> But then i got better at it and learned what is ok is calling a professional person in their professional environment who has uncommon specific industry exposure and has probably crossed paths with specialized individuals within this region and then having a conversation with them to see if they have any thoughts that could help you in finding somebody for this pretty neat position. <S> That approach doesn't put anybody on the spot but allows them to request a deeper conversation later if it peaks their personal interest and if not then can still proceed into a conversation about ideas on how to find somebody or recommend somebody. <S> Almost nobody gets mad at that sort of approach <S> and it's not even that awkard of a conversation to get overheard having it if's just providing input towards a search. <S> End of the day <S> it's all roses if you end up getting a better position out of the call that you otherwise would never have known about.
| On the contrary, and to be a bit more generalist, if it is your personal phone , people just expect you not to answer the call (and call back later), or give a short response like "I am currently at work, please call me back later".
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My coworkers think I'm over 21 and offered me a beer, I accepted it... What do I do now? So here's the story. I'm 19 and just got a job at a small park in the middle of nowhere. There are less than 20 people working at this place, and I deal with them every day. Since everyone I work with in over 21, they assumed I was too, especially since I look so much older than I am. Well, we had a little fire the other night, and my coworker offered me a beer. Being so used to drinking despite my young age, I accepted it... I immediately regretted it when a story that I told led one of my coworkers to jokingly asked "Geez, are you of age?!" Everyone laughed since they thought I was for sure legal, but I didn't know what to do. I just laughed along and replied "I'm just stupid." Analyzing the situation I'm stuck in now, i'd say that at least that statement was true! Now I'm stuck with these people for 2 1/2 more months and I have to keep up this act that I'm over 21. I plan on not drinking anymore, because I realize that that is just simply a bad idea, but I'm worried about them finding out my real age and being upset about it... I'm worried about them talking behind my back and creating a whole situation... What am I supposed to do? <Q> So how big a deal this is really depends on the local culture in your area. <S> In the places I've lived and worked, underage drinking wasn't encouraged, but it was also recognized as something that happens, especially when teenagers get close to legal drinking age. <S> Once you've left highschool and are in college or working full-time or close to full-time you become more like an adult and less like a child. <S> As long as you aren't getting really drunk, or driving under the influence, an occasional beer isn't something that raises too many eyebrows where I'm from. <S> In my opinion, you should just leave it lie and not repeat your mistake, unless you feel that if it was discovered it would be a serious impact to your relationships with your coworkers. <S> If the subject comes up, don't cover up your age and simply tell them the truth. <S> If you feel like your coworkers would be very upset <S> if they found out, you should not wait until it comes up; You should take them aside and explain the situation, apologize, and get on with things as best as you can. <S> The way I would phrase what I think is <S> the truth is: You feel like an adult, and drinking was never a big deal to your family even though you weren't of-age. <S> You realize it is illegal <S> and you're sorry you put your coworkers in that position. <S> It wasn't until afterwards that you realized how awkward it was <S> and you weren't sure what to do, but after thinking about it, decided that honesty is the best policy. <A> Disclaimer: this is terrible advice for almost every other situation involving lying or unprofessional / criminal behaviour. <S> This answer assumes the social drinking with a fire was outside of working hours. <S> Firstly I'm not from the US, where I'm from it's legal to drink from 18 but <S> the legal punishments for supplying alcohol to underaged persons are very harsh. <S> However socially / culturally speaking, this wouldn't be a big deal unless it got 'official', which is what would happen if you were to come clean to everyone now. <S> The damage is done here, my thought is that it could only become worse if you were to tell your coworkers. <S> I think it's important to note that this seems to have taken place in a social setting, presumably outside of working hours? <S> I'm assuming so for this answer, it would be different if you were both "behind your desks". <S> We all do these things when we are young, they are regrettable and unfortunate but 'fessing up' at this stage will only dump a load of stress on the person who gave you the beer - unless of course they don't care, but you can't know that for sure. <S> Also it may damage your relationships with your coworkers, for the next 2 1/2 months, for something that can't be fixed now. <S> The hangover from this is that you are still maintaining a lie about your age to your coworkers, which I do not advise at all, but as others have said there's no 'good' way to deal with this now. <S> My advice - pick yourself up, learn the lesson, move on. <S> In future, don't ever lie to your coworkers. <S> Lies snowball, and leave you with other problems later. <S> Maybe you and the other coworker can have a beer in a few years and laugh about how dumb this situation was, and the lessons learned. <S> note <S> I'm not saying lie further to avoid punishment - and this advice DOES NOT extend to every day situations in the workplace. <A> Well considering your situation I think the next time someone hands over a glass to you, you should just politely say Thanks <S> but I've given up drinking. <S> I mean if you do not intend to drink until you're 21. <S> These are last resorts. <S> That is if your initial fails. <S> As much as I'd hate lying, if you think your age being revealed would make a whole scene, try approaching them alone and <S> well after you're in the clear with them try asking them how they would react to a 19 year old. <S> If they ask why just reply "Out of Curiosity" or something like that. <S> Hope this helps. :)
| If the co-workers of yours are mean and all that just say it in a funny-but-polite way like "I've given up drinking ( For now at least)" gives them the feeling that you'll be back at it some other time or just act as if you're not in the mood. You might want to think about how you would explain it yourself, but I think you should definitely include an apology.
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How to dissuade my boss from answering questions he doesn't know the answer to? From time to time I'll see an email exchange like the following: Customer : Could we have feature X? Boss : That would be tricky because we use UDP so we don't know if data is lost. When in fact we use TCP, not UDP. My boss does this out of a benevolent intent: he knows he should really ask one of the developers technical details like that, but he knows we're busy so he doesn't want to bother us. So he just comes up with some answer, usually an incorrect one. The problem it leaves me in is that now the customer is misinformed and gets annoyed when they later talk to a developer and get inconsistent information. What would be a polite yet convincing way to suggest to my boss that it's better that he not misinform the customer? Or, on the other hand, what might we the developers do differently so that my boss doesn't feel like he needs to shield us from simple questions like this? <Q> The problem it leaves me in is that now the customer is misinformed and gets annoyed when they later talk to a developer and get inconsistent information. <S> Do they get annoyed in writing? <S> If so, share these emails with your boss. <S> It's a customer service issue so just frame it that way: <S> "Our customers are getting annoyed and confused because they're receiving conflicting information. <S> Would it be possible for the developers to handle these questions from now on? <S> What would we need to do for you to be comfortable with us handling this?" <S> If your boss is concerned you don't have time to answer these questions, point out that this doesn't save time since you still have to handle it later. <S> You need to find out from your boss what needs to happen so that he's comfortable letting the team handle these emails. <S> Do they need to be answered in a certain time frame? <S> Does he not want you spending more than X% of your time on customer questions? <S> You won't know what the team needs to do differently until you know what he wants to see happen. <A> Any customer issues, no matter how minor should be documented. <S> If a customer is unhappy it can affect business, so if one complained verbally I would email the boss 'Hey boss, XYX was a bit miffed because he reckons you said we use UDP instead of TCP. <S> I've explained it all to him and he seemed happy enough when he left, but just giving you a heads up.' <S> (Although this particular issue would be too small for me to bother the boss with unless the customer was very irate, normally I'd just do damage control, get the client happy, document it and carry on.) <S> This way there is a record and the boss has been made aware and my back is covered if the customer makes a more formal complaint. <S> I make notes for both my own and the companies future reference of anything out of the ordinary to do with a project. <S> If the customer is unhappy in an email to you, then forward the email to the boss <S> so he's aware. <S> Whichever suits the situation. <S> Use your judgement on this, don't annoy the boss with tiny things (still document them though). <A> If you see such an email exchange, why not reply to your boss 1 and inform him off his mistake as soon as you see it <S> 2 ? <S> 1. <S> Make sure you reply to your boss only and don't do a reply all. <S> 2. <S> You can only correct him on things you know about
| Or email an apology and outline a solution cc'ing the boss. The boss (assuming he is competent) will change his methods on his own after a few 'heads up'.
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Is it okay to ask the notice period of future employer I have a new Job offer and I don't know the notice period of the new compnany, Is it okay to ask the notice period of future employer <Q> You can always ask. <S> Personally, I would not ask. <S> Instead, I would get the job offer, accept it in principle, then review the entire employment contract before signing it. <S> It is entirely legitimate to ask that something unacceptable in a contract be changed, and to walk away without signing if an agreement can not be reached. <S> Of course that would mean walking away from the job too. <S> Before you do anything else, though, I suggest researching this in other ways. <S> Find out whether there is a commonly agreed upon notice period in that country -- or if one is officially required at all, rather than just being a courtesy. <S> See if you can find the answer for this company on line somewhere, or find a way to ask anonymously. <A> Thats not a good idea. <S> It will cause the recruiter to think that you're already planning to leave this new company <S> soon should you get the job, which is not a good impression to give. <S> Notice periods are usually outlined in the contract. <S> So before signing it, you should read it. <S> So, for better or worse, you'll get this information when you get the contract. <A> Rather than asking specifically about the notice period, you should ask to see the contract and examine it for yourself. <S> Say something like "I appreciate the job offer. <S> Before accepting I would like a chance to review the full contract. <S> Can you please send me a copy?" <S> If I were the hiring manager I wouldn't find this strange or off putting. <S> If there is no contract clause regarding this then refer to local employment law as to what is required of the employee by default.
| If there is no notice period specified in the contract, the legal standard in your country applies. If you can get the answer without having to ask directly, that's less likely to cause problems. But asking this question will make the interviewer worry about how serious you are about this job application.
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Said yes to full time employment but got a better offer I have been working with an IT company for three years now. This was in addition to my studies. For my final exam I had to do an internship. Halfway through my internship, my boss (from my job) asked if I would continue to work there after I finished my internship and I said explicitly yes. I currently have a contract that doesn't specify any set number of hours, but work 30-40 hours most weeks. This contract runs until January. After then I will get (and I have explicitly verbally agreed to accept) a full time contract. In the final week of my internship, the company I was interning with offered me a job as well. Since there are better options for the future, I want to accept the job at my internship. However I have made most of the software that is being used by the company and feel obliged to stay there until they find another developer who can do my job, but by then the offer may have expired. I haven't signed a contract at my current job yet but I have made a verbal agreement. I am a bit lost about what to do now. Does anyone have suggestions ? <Q> I have made most of the software that is being used by the company and feel obliged to stay there until they find another developer who can do my job, by when the offer may have expired. <S> Don't be concerned by this. <S> What would happen if you were hit by a bus on your way to work tomorrow? <S> If they can't survive you being hit by a bus, they are in very bad shape and you probably shouldn't work for them anyways. <S> So, once you get another offer and contract to look at, compare the two and decide which to take. <S> If you end up not going to the internship company, just tell them you have decided to pursue a different opportunity. <A> It seems you are at least stuck until January with this company (according to your contract), but I would talk to your current employer about your situation, and see if you could do remote work. <S> Since you claim to have written "most of the software" your current employer might be more lenient on you, and allow you the ability to work out of the office. <S> You also might be able to negotiate work hours, and all that since I'm sure your current company trusts you greatly since most of the work was done by you. <S> This all depends if you are up for working at one place, while doing remote work for another. <S> You also need to figure out the hours you would be working at Intern-Job, and see if it's feasible. <S> 80 hour work weeks aren't uncommon. <S> If you only want to do one Job, then you really need to look at the options. <S> Why exactly is the current company not "future-proof" whereas the Intern-company is? <S> I'm assuming Pay is a factor in this, but also how much work you will be doing, and most importantly, which job will give you the more enjoyable experience, in ability to have fun coding, learn a lot, and have a great environment. <S> You already know the system, far more than anyone else too, you already have proven yourself with the company <S> so I don't see why they would not be accommodating to you, if you wanted this other job, especially since they seem to need you. <S> You could make great money, learn a lot, but the only thing would be having to work more hours. <S> Good luck! <A> If you have not signed anything, then you are in no way obligated to stay with your current employer past your current contract. <S> If you think the new opportunity is better for you, then you should accept it and inform your current boss that you aren't planning on staying with them. <S> You shouldn't feel obligated to stay with your current because you are important to the organization. <S> You should look out for your best interest, just as the company will look out for their best interest. <S> They have until January to find a replacement and have you train them. <S> That is plenty of time.
| Personally, as someone who does contract/remote work I think snagging current-job as a remote work would be great.
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Ask for vacation without lying or revealing unwanted information I found a new job recently and I haven't got any vacation yet that I can take. I talked to my boss already to take some vacation at the end of the month for a very good reason -to pass my Master's degree exams-. However next week I found out that my partner has an extremely important medical meeting with a doctor and doesn't want to go alone. I would like to ask to take the afternoon but don't know how to tell my boss about the reason without revealing my sexual orientation or lying. Is there any way to go about this? <Q> I would like to ask to take the afternoon but don't know how to tell my boss about the reason without revealing my sexual orientation or lying. <S> Is there any way to go about this? <S> It's perfectly reasonable to ask to take the afternoon "to attend to a personal matter". <S> Most employers won't probe any deeper, unless for some reason that is a critical time for you to be in the office. <A> Just say you have to go to A doctor's appointment and need to take a half-day. <S> They likely won't ask questions beyond that, and you're not lying, even though it's not YOUR doctor's appointment. <A> For how to request the time off, as others have already said, just say it's a doctor's appointment without specifying whose or its nature, or <S> say you need some personal time. <S> Generally, such requests are respected without further inquiry, at least in my experience. <S> Something not said so far <S> is that you could offer to make up the time if the nature of your job and your workplace (and your schedule) allows. <S> Thus you might be able to avoid using vacation or sick leave (or the more generic paid time off if that's what your employer grants). <S> You might want to tell the boss something like "I need to be out of the office on Thursday afternoon. <S> If it's okay with you, I will make it up by coming back into work that evening. <S> " Or whatever works for you. <S> In my job I can often just leave for whatever non-work event I need to be gone for and make up the time as my schedule permits.
| You may even find that - if your job allows and you're not otherwise missing meetings or other important work events - you don't need to bother saying anything, although I don't recommend assuming that, especially when you're new.
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Team is a disorganized mess vaguely resembling Scrum, manager is AWOL, team disagreements about how to implement testing, what should I do? We are an IT company and our team works for one type of products in the company. My manager currently has 9 people onsite and around 15-20 people working offshore under him. He has too many issues to handle and so he split his team into 4 sub teams. I am a Software Engineer I and we have SE II and SE III in the team as well. We started working on a new product last October and have small scrum team of 8 members (4 offshore and 4 onsite). I am a Developer onsite. Since I actively worked on the initial stages of the product and have more knowledge on latest technologies than other senior members in the team, over the time, it just happened that I am running the scrum and doing story assignments etc. From last couple of months my manager sidelined himself on other issues and put less concentration on this team and I am managing the scrum team in terms of work. I stopped writing code since a month since I am getting overwhelemd, but working on blocker issues, handling inter-team dependent issues etc. I do write code for such issues. So far we have all the team doing both coding and testing for their own stories. We found we are running at the end of sprint and folks are not spending as much time required and planned for testing. Everyone agrees to that. I called for a meeting 10 days ago and asked for everyones opinions. There were a range of ideas on why quality is hindered - Not spending enough time on planning. Requirements are not clear at the start of sprint. So scope changes during sprint are not allowing enough time to test. Suggestions to overcome them where 50% working on Testing and 50% on Coding in rotation for every sprint (was originally my Manager's plan and I read it out in the meeting. He was not in the meeting). Some suggested folks to do both testing and coding but test for others' stories. Some have concerns that will not work since as long as person is coding, he won't have time for testing at the end irrespective of it is his story or other's story. There were other ideas as well, but we had this discussion. We finished a sprint yesterday and planning for the next one today. Had a discussion with onsite members yesterday and everyone was okay with trying 50% testing and coding. We together decided on that idea onsite and put that idea in sprint planning meeting where offshore folks are also present. My manager knew we were going to do this. I acknowledge here that If I am going to write code, I would hate testing the entire sprint. But it was manager's idea and I was okay to try it. During planning, one of the team members doesn't like the idea (may be because he is going to be in QA this sprint) and argued a little in the meeting. He said all the offshore discussing on it before planning and thought it would be good if everyone does both coding and testing because productivity will be less, some have to just wait for the code to be delivered (But, they have tasks to fix a few bugs and create tests cases during that time). My manager was aware that productivity will be less. I also spoke about it in the meeting (but did not say it was Manager's). To get it going, I concluded saying I hear all of them but I want to try this for a sprint and see how it goes and we can try other ideas for next sprint. I guess this team member is mad at me now. I just felt like that, there were no explicit signs, but based on the way he spoke. How to handle such situations ? I don't have any personal grudge or hard feelings and want to be nice to everyone. I am developer and was working along side them until now. I understand we can run a team successfully when everyone is happy and is in agreement. This person is offshore and we don't interact face to face. They work in another country in different timezone. <Q> However, I concluded saying I hear all of them <S> but I want to try this for a sprint and see how it goes. <S> So basically, despite their objections, you ordered them around. <S> I'm not sure what you think <S> you are doing or what you think <S> your role there is (you never told us) but <S> this is not an agile or Scrum team. <S> There is no "manager" of a Scrum team telling them what to do. <S> It's called "Inspect and adapt", not "My manager inspected and told me to adapt and now I have to do how he says". <S> You have two options: <S> You can either get a buy-in from your team , which means at least the majority should be on your side on this issue. <S> And not by not complaining, but by actively voicing their support for this change. <S> Then the team changed how the team is going to organize and nobody can be mad at you. <S> You did not have anything to do with it. <S> You could also make clear what you expect from your team. <S> Maybe less bugs or another quantifiable quality measurement? <S> Voice your expectations and let them come to conclusions how to get there. <S> Matter of fact you have a third option: <S> stop pretending it's Scrum and return to command and control. <S> Because that seems to be your current behavior. <S> Sure it's sugar coated and you listen to them, but if you don't value their opinion, you might as well stop pretending. <A> We have small scrum team of 8 members. <S> I'm currently managing the scrum team w.r.t work and assignments though I'm not technically not the manager of the team. <S> These two sentences don't align. <S> If you are doing scrum, then there shouldn't be any assignment of work. <S> Team members should be picking up stories as they go. <S> Ideally they should be capable of handling any story and try to work on a variety of stories to maintain as broad a skill-set as needed. <S> If there is a need for more/better QA, you should discuss this with the product owner and the scrum team to decide how the group wants to solve the problem. <S> If you are in some sort of technical leadership role (which it sounds like), then it is fine for you to bring this need to team, but the team needs to decide how to handle it. <S> With respect to the current unhappiness, this is something that should be handled in the retrospective discussion so that the team can decide how to proceed in future sprints. <S> Update post question edit : Discussing with half of the scrum team (the onsite half) is not how this should work and you have likely alienated the off-shore half. <S> In the scrum model, all non-PO team members should be equals in discussing how the team should operate. <S> You have just told the 4 offsite workers that they are not equal. <A> There are details which you're either leaving out or glossing over which will deeply impact how the situation should be approached. <S> I'll discuss each point and some questions that come to mind: <S> You tell us that you're not the manager, yet are enforcing changes. <S> Are these changes being implemented with the support and consent of the team, or based on your say-so / authority? <S> If you, while not officially being their boss, suddenly want to impose major changes <S> it's only natural that some people will react poorly to your display of authority. <S> In other words depending on your position within the team and how you went about announcing these changes might be what caused the friction. <S> You are taking steps to impose fairly fundamental changes. <S> This right away raises two important questions. <S> Are they necessary, and does the team understand/agree that they are necessary? <S> If sub-par code is being delivered by some of the team members and this is your solution then this person might feel like he's paying for someone else's mistake. <S> Did you communicate your reasoning and motivations for wanting to adopt these changes? <S> Did your fellow team mates get a chance to give you some input, or speak their minds? <S> Was there any sort of debate about the situation? <S> You don't mention how you handled all of the above, so it's very difficult to ascertain what the team might actually be feeling right now. <S> However, I suggest that you take this person's reticence as a sign that others may have misgivings as well. <S> Is this guy generally a trouble maker, or is his dissent coming as a complete surprise? <S> If this person is generally a poor team mate then you shouldn't worry too much about his attitude - some people are never going to be happy no matter what you do. <S> You may wish to speak to him and simply set him straight. <S> However, if he generally goes along with the team decisions and is only now expressing concerns then most likely something about your approach set him off. <S> This is more delicate situation. <S> You should approach him, get some feedback, and address his concerns. <A> I guess this team member is mad at me now. <S> I just felt like that, there were no explicit signs, but based on the way he spoke. <S> How to handle such situations ? <S> You handle it by letting him be mad, but still hold him accountable for his deliverables. <S> You aren't their boss. <S> You aren't their babysitter. <S> You aren't their HR rep. <S> You aren't their career counselor. <S> Instead you are the Scrum Master (or are otherwise managing this scrum team). <S> You do your job of running the team, and require that he do his job.
| Make a team-wide statement explaining your reasoning (if you haven't already) and address their concerns.
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What should I do when a telephone interview is disrupted by bad voice quality? Sometimes I have a hard time hearing everything that is said during a telephone interview. When I interview it is most commonly handled on the phone. I have noticed that I sometimes have trouble hearing the interviewer. In particular I have a hard time hearing the first part of the sentence. Usually I just carry on and try to pretend that I understood the question, when in reality I only heard a few words or a phrase. How should I handle this situation? Will the interviewer think any less of me if I ask for clarification? <Q> Do not continue on any interview where you or the other party cannot hear properly. <S> Period. <S> Try to dial back in once or twice. <S> If that doesn't help things reschedule. <S> Follow up immediately via email. <S> You do not want to be the annoying person that the hiring manager couldn't hear or the person that didn't answer half of their questions. <S> Without good voice communications there are just too many things that can go wrong. <S> It would be really easy to be asked a question and then answer a different one. <S> The hiring manager might understand the quality is bad (at best) and cut you slack but they will ultimately equate you with an annoying phone call. <S> At very best they might try you again for basically the same step in the interview process and <S> that is best case scenario... <S> so just end it when it happens. <A> We're all familiar with modern communications and the sometimes poor connections we have with them. <S> If the connection is so bad that you cannot get anything through, send an email immediately (or message if you're using Skype or some similar service) explaining that you cannot hear them and you will try hanging up and trying a new connection. <S> Wait for a response before actually hanging up. <S> Often this helps resolve the problem. <S> If reconnecting doesn't solve the problem, ask (via email or message) if you can reschedule the interview. <S> If connections are consistently bad for you, change locations. <S> If they continue to be bad, your device is probably the problem, and you owe it to yourself to use a different device. <S> (Buy one, or borrow one.) <S> It will be very difficult to have a quality interview when you cannot understand each other. <A> This sounds like an important problem. <S> As an interviewer one of the main questions I'm trying to resolve/answer in an interview is, "Do we understand each other?" <S> By "understand each other <S> " I include: Language (accent and vocabulary) Personality and motivation Technical ability Adding a hardware problem doesn't help, interferes. <S> It's not just an interview problem too <S> , i.e. if you can't understand me during the interview then you won't be able to understand me if we're working together. <S> If you can't understand what's said then I suppose you should say so, and maybe try to fix it <S> (maybe somebody needs a better microphone or better internet connection, or switch off video in order to improve the audio), even reschedule the interview. <S> If you answer a question that I didn't ask, that'll give me the impression that you don't understand me or vice versa and that we can't or shouldn't try to work together. <A> I have hearing problems and occasionally have to "zero" in on sound for a while before catching on. <S> With that said, it wouldn't hurt to simply state that your phone is not the best or that you have difficulties hearing. <S> Just be sure to state this prior to the interview. <S> If you don't want to do that try small talks at first such as asking how everyone is, the weather, etc to get used to the person's voice.
| When you realize your connection is bad, mention it to the other party and ask if you can disconnect and call again. Certain voices on telephone produces problems and it's not entirely dependent upon being foreign but just a certain quality and grade.
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Employee died unexpectedly - how should I act towards the deceased's colleague? So, I work in a small company, we mostly do temporary projects for a very big company with many departments. In one of the departments, an employee died unexpectedly some weeks ago. I did not know the deceased, and only know his colleague from 2-3 technical problem related mails nearly a year ago. Now I have a meeting with the colleague next week, the topic is about the work of his deceased colleague and how I could finish it. I don't know how the relation between him and his deceased colleague was, but they seemed to work together for a long time. In this situation, is it common to console the colleague or behave neutral and try to keep the conversation on technical level, or should I not mention the deceased member at all? I am not sure how I should behave at that meeting, primarily it is about the projects the deceased member was working on and how to finish them, but it is difficult to avoid the topic of unexpected death. Can somebody give me an advise how I should handle this situation? I live and work in Germany, if there is a different cultural behaviour in such cases. <Q> “I was surprised to hear the news, and I am very sorry for the loss. <S> How is his family doing?” <S> Then listen for a minute and let his colleague say whatever they want. <S> They may have a lot to say, or very little. <S> After that, it’s appropriate to get back to business: <S> “So, where do we go from here?” <A> I’d probably combine the two at once, actually. <S> “I’m sorry to hear about George. <S> Nobody will be able to replace him, but I’ll do my best to help cover his project for you in a way which would have made him proud. <S> What can I do to help?” <S> After all, there may be sensitivity to your replacing him, and this acknowledges that, as well as affirming that you will do your best to fill in the gap, and transitioning to an action statement gently. <A> Maybe culture is different in Germany, but in America, the common approach would be to make a brief expression of sympathy, like say, "Wow, I'm really sorry to hear about George." <S> If the other person wasn't all that close to George <S> and you didn't particularly know the deceased, they'll thank you for your expression of concern, maybe say a sentence or two, and then start talking about work. <S> Or if there's an awkward silence, you should start talking about work. <S> If the other person was very close to the deceased, or is particularly emotional, they may go on about it. <S> If they start reminiscing about what a great guy George was and all the good times they had together, you normally just let them go on, make some polite comments, and let them finish. <S> If it goes on very long and/or makes you uncomfortable, then bring the conversation back to work. <S> If they get really emotional, break down and start crying or something, then it depends on your personality whether you want to console them or try to get them back on work topics. <S> But that would be very rare. <S> I've had co-workers tell me about some very upsetting personal problems, but not often, and not because of the death of a co-worker.
| I don’t think you can go wrong by expressing sympathy for a loss like that:
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Why would a company blindside everyone during a layoff? During a "downsizing" why wouldn't a companies give people 1-2 weeks notice beforehand so they have a chance to train other employees about what they were working on, say goodbye, etc? Severance pay is nice for finding a new job, but not for being able to keep in touch with other employees, setting up references, etc. What reasons would a company have for doing it suddenly and without warning? <Q> <A> If you make someone redundant you are saying their job is not needed <S> thus there is nothing to hand over. <S> If there was then the person being made redundant could have a legal case Also making people redundant says the company is not doing well. <S> Knowledge of the redundancy could affect a company's stock price (could significantly rise! <S> or fall) <S> this stock market rules could well mean that notice cannot be given. <S> However I suspect the main reason is as given in other answers that if you sack someone they could tend to take retaliatory action so best to stop the employee's ability to do that, <A> Aside from what's being said already by @kevincline, telling someone that they'll be laid off, then asking them to train other employees to do their job is quite absurd, they'll just tell you to screw you. <S> In fact, asking them to do anything productive will be most likely be met anger. <S> There is really no valid point in keeping an employee that you have laid off. <S> And for an employee, there is absolutely no valid point to stay at work once they know they'll be laid off.
| To prevent malicious actions by the departing employees.
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How can i get someone to stop repeating themselves? In my workplace there is a specific person who will repeat themselves over, and over.A 2-minute conversation is repeated, without adding anything, multiple times. How can I politely tell them that they literally said that under a minute ago? <Q> I can think of three basic reasons why someone would repeat themselves: <S> it's a personal tic, like Foghorn Leghorn <S> - I say, son, I say you better normalize that database, I say normalize it now! <S> they believe, from your verbal or nonverbal responses, that you don't yet "get it <S> " so they repeat, perhaps using the exact same words (not so useful) or perhaps rewording the meeting is over, but you're not leaving, so they rather desperately wrap up and summarize to let you know <S> - So, yeah, <S> basically, that's it, just normalize it <S> , that's all really, yeah, <S> normalize it, if you could take care of that ... <S> the normalizing ... <S> that's really all there is.... <S> None of these will be cured by you asking them not to repeat. <S> The first you need to ignore and the second and third mean that you and this person have your cues set at different levels. <S> Try being "up a level" with your "got it" and your own summaries, and try wrapping up the meeting once you know what you need to know. <S> Try explicitly asking "is there anything else we need to talk about" once you've heard things once. <S> Don't interrupt a repetition, but do reply to it. <S> Either "yes, I get it, three new reports, by Friday" kind of summary or [read notes] <S> "yes, I have all that. <S> " <S> Acknowledge what you're being told - <S> especially if it's "make it so" because I have told you three times what needs to be done, but you're still standing in my office! <A> Write down bullet points of what they say. <S> As they are about to launch their tirade, grab a pen and paper and say Just let me make a couple of notes... <S> For each point they make, write down a bullet point <S> Their tirade will be politely halted when they see in black and write that they are repeating themselves. <A> Along the same line of listening and paraphrasing what you heard back to them. <S> Take notes and show the notes back to that person. <S> Or use a whiteboard to help them keep track of what they're saying while they're saying it. <S> Also, you could have a sequential written agenda prepared before the meeting even takes place. <S> And you could require that person to have that agenda prepared in advance before you even agree to finalize the time for the meeting. <S> There is also something to be said for setting a time limit beforehand and enforcing it with an egg timer or an hourglass. <S> Or mandating that the meeting be stand-up only, so that no one gets too comfortable. <A> I would try saying it back to them, i.e. Person: " <S> Well Terry, I think xyzkcd" XXX blah blah blah other conversation XXX Person: <S> "I think xyz.."Terry <S> (interrupting) <S> " I totally agree with you, like you said before xyzkcd!" <S> If you take control of the conversation, they won't be able to repeat themselves so much, <S> you can then end the chat at that point too. <S> Don't be shy about it, what you take as being polite and letting them talk this person may be taking to be you not listening/ taking in what you're saying.
| When they start repeat a point, put your pen on the relevant bullet point and interrupt them saying yep, got that and show them your notes.
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How should a teenage girl get ready for a job hunt? I am considering doing a physical job hunt sometime today (Saturday, 6/11/16), and I am wondering if maybe I need to up my game in terms of my looks? And being as I have no real experience or marketable job skills, how should I sell my self? <Q> Relax. <S> 98% of what an employer cares about is whether you can do the job well. <S> Going in grungy might cost you the job, but going in dressed as you would for dealing with any other adult -- not high fashion, but looking clean, non-challenging, and respectable -- is really all that's needed unless you are trying for a job in an extremely high-fashion place. <S> Basically, just go in clothes that don't force then to notice the clothes, and you'll be fine. <S> No evening gowns, no rude t-shirts, no torn jeans unless that's the style they sell. <S> Present yourself as the kind of store employee you would be comfortable asking advice from. <S> That really is most of what they are looking for. <A> As a teenager you need to worry about people taking you seriously. <S> Try not to wear tennis shoes or exercise clothes. <S> If it's notAbercrombie & Fitch or whatever then how you look will not be the most important thing. <S> You will look professional and serious about it than if you bring around copies of your CV printed out. <S> (Very old school). <S> Have a firm handshake and make eye contact. <S> Best of luck. <A> I don't think your physical appearance (how your face/body looks) is hugely important. <S> No one expects teenagers to be great beauties, and if they do it might be better not applying for those places. <S> It might be a good idea to skip the dangly earrings or go for something smaller. <S> As @user26491 <S> mentions a professional manner will is important.
| Dress "sensibly" nothing over the top, you don't need lots of make up etc. As long as you are wearing clothes and makeup that would be appropriate for the workplace you are applying for that is what is most important.
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How can I seem not sketchy /what's "normal" when sharing code to company without giving them access to my server/github repo? A private company allowed me to use their API to make REST API calls (using Basic Authentication) in my application's server side. They also asked to see my implementation before I can go live. From their standpoint I understand they would like to make sure the API keys are secure enough. From my standpoint I would prefer not to grant them access to my server side code or my github repo, but rather,like they asked, just show them how it was implemented. What's the "normal" way of doing this / How can I achieve this without coming off as rude?We are communicating through email is it weird/rude/sketchy to just send over a .js file from my node.js server that shows them how it was implemented without them seeing it live or giving them access to my server/repo? <Q> Email Since they are only interested in the API, you do not need to grant them access to your source code repository. <S> A simple email with a zip of the relevant source code would suffice. <S> It is recommended that if you value the source code to make sure it is well labeled that you are the owner, and that the email is sent in a secure fashion (like encrypting the zip file and providing password separately). <S> With that said what is 'normal' for companies when they can see the other company's source code: <S> Non Disclosure Agreement (NDA) <S> For companies the two parties sign a type of non disclosure agreement which in short protects the proprietary information of each group's part of the solution. <S> If you want to help protect your code, I would recommend asking if they have a NDA agreement already created that you both could sign. <A> If your customer is close to you, you can propose an on-site audit. <S> One of their engineers drops by, and you show them how you have organized security. <S> In this way you don't have to grant them access rights to your server. <S> This kind of audits are extensively used, for example in security or food production. <A> Sending an archive of the pertinent code with the implementation is fine. <S> I would not use hardcoded API keys, at the very least keep them in a secrets file and add it to your .gitignore. <S> If you are worried about looking professional make sure to include a license either at the top as a comment or better yet in a separate license file and double check to make sure you comment anything they are looking at that may need to be explained. <A> This should never exist in code nor should it be in git. <S> For example I use a Jenkins server that floats in required values at build time. <S> This includes encrypted keys and secrets which are then decrypted and placed into secure areas on the server the code-behind can access. <S> In this scenario you really don't have anything you can "hand over" more than a diagram that shows the security that's been put in place around your code. <S> Further more they will likely want to sure that you are communicating via secure channels with their API so as long as they are SSL'd on their end <S> you can make sure this is apparent in your diagrams. <S> This should help them feel secure in how your utilize and access their services. <S> Short of a security review and them questioning how you harden your systems there isn't much else you can do <S> (that I am familiar with given my exposure to enterprise security and contract negotiations)
| Something that hasn't been covered or discussed is to simply send them an architectural diagram of how your code access these API key and secret. Obviously be sure to read any agreement they provide to make sure it is not one sided, or if your code is sufficiently valuable to you, consult a lawyer to review the agreement. In addition, you can directly address any questions the engineer might have.
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New to Company – Potential Overbearing Peer Problem I've recently been recruited into a large organisation in the UK as part of a huge hiring drive the business has engaged in with regards to their development function. I'm a Senior Developer, and my manager is in charge of the whole department. Around 75% of the department are new with more people on the way, so everything has yet to be established at this point in time. There are around 50/60 people in the department at the moment, and the reporting structure is somewhat in a state of flux with varying job titles and odd reporting lines. As far as I am aware, I report into my manager for your usual HR functions (appraisals, holidays, etc). For day to day tasks, this depends on what project you've been assigned. I've recently been put on a project. The company implements projects using a very established Agile approach. There is a huge emphasis around collaboration and communication. The project itself is extremely simple. Myself and a very small team of new starters have been put to task. The project is being “supervised” by another Senior Developer (who I believe has been here for a few years), who refers to himself outside the organisation as a “Lead Developer”. He's extremely enthusiastic around the whole subject of development, almost of the point of it seeming as though he's “trying too hard”. He's quite bossy in the way he has briefed us, imposing his own deadlines and deliverables and even belittling the difficulty of the task we've been given. Other people have commented on this person and his personality already. I've noticed that over the weekend, out of business hours, he has been heavily altering the code (including deleting various parts of the system) even though this project was obviously intended to be for us to cut our teeth on as us new starters as a team. There was no communication/email sent out here – it's just been changed by himself, I assume, to meet his own “standards”. It's certainly not the definition of team work, and begs the question why a team was needed to complete the project at all. So the question is; what do I do here? The first approach is to talk to my manager – do I raise this as a concern with him? I feel he's reasonable, but I'm new to the company, and this developer isn't. It could make my life tricky in the department. The second approach is get my CV out there and move as soon as possible. This is of course the easy option in some ways - but I would feel as though I was giving up. The third approach would be to take this up directly with the said developer. This, in my opinion, is the riskiest approach, considering his overbearing nature. Considering I am new to the company, he may consider this as a challenge to his self imposed authority. <Q> Having that many people pour into your department challenges stability and really puts stress on the organizational structures. <S> In your situation, you have a coworker/lead that likely feels threatened and insecure. <S> He manifests this by reacting with overbearing and self-imposed authority. <S> People often act in ways which are opposite to how they feel. <S> By changing a bunch of code without permission nor communication, this person is reclaiming some measure of control and responding to this new environment which he likely didn't ask for. <S> Get to know him and then ask to be clued into the changes he's making. <S> The idea is to develop a level of trust between you and him. <S> Once trust has been established, he is far less likely to act out in unhelpful ways, or at least he's in a better position to be reasoned with. <S> It might sound like this advice would apply to children and that's not by coincidence. <S> Adults often do act out in childlike ways when they're thrust into a situation where they have (or perceive they have) lost control. <S> Running to management with this problem will put yet another complex problem on their desk and is likely to inspire an even worse reaction from the overbearing one. <S> You can always quit if the problem becomes intractable but at this point, it is worth making an effort towards a solution. <S> People have survived and thrived in much worse situations than yours. <S> So, I think the "third approach" is actually the safest if you FIRST work to establish trust with this person and work with them as an ally. <A> It's still pretty early days with this company. <S> Before elevating this issue formally maybe go for a coffee with some other people who have been at the company for a few years also and (tactfully) ask them about it. <S> He may be well known for this sort of thing. <S> " I noticed the code to complete xyz has been edited in abc way before being released , can you confirm why / what the issue was etc so that we can ensure that we avoid these mistakes in future" <A> I would approach the problem from a simple perspective. <S> He made some changes on the code but did not let anyone know, right? <S> If he likes authority and power, simply feed it to him. <S> When you have a casual moment (lunch, around the water cooler, etc.) ask him in a polite and yet admiring way (sucking up is a tool to use wisely with seniority employees) <S> " <S> Hey Name, I noticed you made X changes to ABC code. <S> It looked interesting, what was the code before? <S> I just wanted to know <S> so I can be on the lookout for those kind of situations again. <S> What was the issue with it (make up some generic reasons here such as poor optimization, ram usage, etc)?" <S> This appeals to his management persona and admires his coding skills subtly without sounding incompetent. <S> Once you know why he made the edit, you have 2 decisions to make: Correct & Worth <S> It : the edit was justified and needed. <S> Thank him and move on. <S> Incorrect & Wasted Time : The best approach here is to turn to team work and deflect the issue and focusing on developing your management relationship by saying "Oh ok. <S> I just always operated by making sure that everyone feels their work is valued and appreciated. <S> Also, it's good to keep others in the loop just in case something depended on those codes and there is cross-functionality issues/etc. <S> No? <S> (Add laugh with an "eh" here for a lighthearted effect)" <A> As an engineer myself, I can attest to the occasionally headstrong developer causing friction within a team; I can also attest to some of the best software developers I know being these people. <S> Of course I can't say one way or another from your question as it was presented short-form. <S> Your peer might be as unbearable as implied, in which case it is entirely appropriate to raise your concerns to your manager. <S> On the flip side, perhaps you can leverage this person to grow within the company. <S> Ask him why he changed the code over the weekend. <S> What did he think was wrong, and why did he change it like he did? <S> If he's changing the code because he thinks he can do it better, it may be more constructive to perform documented code reviews if your agile process allows for it. <S> This would legitimize his ninja code editing, but it would make it transparent to everyone. <S> It wouldn't be "ninja" anymore, just a common development practice.
| Your organization has had a huge flux of new people and you can expect that some folks aren't going to handle the situation smoothly. If anyone's code has issues, I want to make sure to show them how they can improve it in the future and teach them some tricks we might know. Since you don't yet know the lay of the land, I would recommend being very non confrontational, you can highlight the issues you're having with an email nominally addressed to this guy but cc'ing all involved with the project (including your manager) where you ask a series of innocent questions along the lines of If he's been there a while, there may be some tribal knowledge he has that the newer team members are not aware of. I think the best way to approach this problem is to make some gestures of kindness to this person.
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Starting fresh as an "old" new software engineer I'm in school right now, and in a couple of years, I'm going to look for work as a software/systems engineer. The thing is that right now, I'm 32 years old. With age being a potential issue, where is age less of an issue? What type of company/culture should be absolutely avoided? Any warning signs? Some backstory, if you have the time. (TL;DR, I'll be an "old" man in a new job, and it could suck.) I've got a couple more years to go before I graduate with a BS (Yes, I know degrees aren't everything, but I have none at all , except for an Arabic AA.) in CompSci, as well as several AASs (in Computer Programming, Web Development, and Comp Sci) and several certs (C++, Java, OracleSQL). Right now, I'm just not comfortable putting myself on the market because I don't feel yet I'm even an "average good" programmer, though I'm putting tremendous effort toward that. On the bright side, I didn't start out software/tech ignorant. I was in the Marines for 8 years, finishing the last three in Special Operations Intelligence (Signals), and did contracting for a year in a company that specialized in networking centric geolocation. Got laid off and went back to school. Then was hired as a contract worker for Google for over a year and a half. I've had plenty of computer science exposure and OJT in programming (also UAS systems, remote sensing, GIS, database design/implementation, and SDRs), but have only really dedicated myself academically to Computer Science/Software Engineering in the last year, after realizing this really is what makes me happy, and where I seem to have the most suitable talents. Thing is, I'm going to be a 34-35 year old entry level employee, working with 22-24 year olds starting fresh as well, but they are all shiny and new(and may actually have more experience in tech industry), which may make me look bad. People my age will have over 10 years experience and will not be my peers, likely having senior positions in company. I feel it could be a situation where it looks like I'm experienced because of my age, but when I behave like a new guy, which I will be, I'll be treated like an idiot, instead of a new guy. I've got a family to worry about, so this is really stressing me out. <Q> Firstly, you're not "old". <S> Also, I wouldn't worry if you have Google on your resume, that should get a lot of employers interested in hiring you. <S> IMHO, in the IT world an on-line persona is as valuable as your resume. <S> Consider: establishing some reputation on stackoverflow contribute to open source <S> github <S> projects write a blog and get followers and include references to these in your resume. <A> I'll add another point on what an "entry-level hire" actually is. <S> An entry level hire, ESPECIALLY a programmer, still thinks work is school, that someone has an answer, and someone will come in and save the day if you are stuck. <S> That is completely untrue. <S> If you're assigned a task, most likely nobody knows what's wrong, only that "it stopped working, please look into it". <S> Whatever stupid habits that an "entry-level" hire has, I have full confidence that 8 years of Marines fixed all of it. <S> Probably far more thoroughly than 8 years in the software industry (things like stubbornness and arrogance don't go away working in IT). <S> If you have passion for the industry, you'll pick it up with minimal hand-holding, and any company worth working for will know that. <A> I'm going to amplify @Patricia Shanahan's comment and expand on it a bit: <S> You are not an entry-level hire. <S> In my experience as a developer, "entry-level" is used to refer to someone who is fresh out of school - whether that be high school or undergrad - and is starting their first career-track job. <S> You have significant experience in technology - at least five years' worth, three with the Marines and two in the private sector. <S> I might even call that ten years, depending on what exactly you did with the Marines in your first five years. <S> At worst, you'll be categorized as a "career-switcher" - someone with experience in one field who is switching to another field. <S> Yes, you only recently received a formal education in computer science. <S> And yes, you may be applying for your first job where your title is "Software Engineer" or the like. <S> You're still way ahead of the 23-year-olds in terms of life experience and understanding the world around you. <S> You may make some rookie mistakes in your first couple of months on the job. <S> The difference is that you've made rookie mistakes before - in much higher-stakes situations than a corporate programming job - and know that the sky doesn't fall when you make them. <S> You're gonna be fine. <A> As someone who owns a development company and has spent the last 8 years looking to hire the "right" person, I can tell you that your "story" (the resume plus your career history and your commentary about it) would make you a top candidate on my list of applicants. <S> The issue will be (and is for everyone applying in a competitive field) how you position yourself when you write up your resume and especially when you interview. <S> For one, if your age is a pervasive thought in your head that you can not shake, you should talk about it in your interview. <S> Some people will suggest that you not even consider it an issue and never bring it up, but that could be impossible for you. <S> If that is the case, I would comment on it. <S> Bring up the fact that this is your second career path in life and because of that, you are more certain than any younger entry-level applicant that this is the path that you want to go down. <S> You can call on your previous experience in the military, which is always impressive, to show that you are dedicated and hard working. <S> Commitment to a cause or <S> company is rare in my opinion and your background shows that you are capable of that, so lean on that! <S> The scenarios you imagine where you are making typical beginner mistakes are not going to be really come in to play. <S> People who make beginner mistakes will be corrected, and if the company you are working for is a decent one, they will teach you how and why and watch to see if you learn from it. <S> From there it's up to you, like every other person in that position, to take the ball and run. <S> But seriously, I have been looking to hire a veteran programmer for some time! <S> Just haven't found one. <S> I think you'll do fine! <S> Just go at it like any other person would.
| Once you actually get the job your age will be a non-issue. Relevant experience counts for a lot, and you need some age to have amassed experience, which you seem to have.
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Arranging drinks with laid off coworkers in close-knit team I work in a close-knit team of about 20 that just suffered layoffs. Some of the surviving employees and laid off employees are friends, and several survivors have suggested arranging drinks with the entire former team. Keep in mind that we were all at the same level of the hierarchy, roughly speaking. I am aware of the potential for this arrangement to be awkward, both because some of us still have jobs and others don't and because the company might not be happy about us getting together. Is it at all advisable for us to meet for drinks and what potential pitfalls should we be aware of to avoid creating problems at work? <Q> The company has no business being interested in what you do in your spare time. <S> As long as you keep this outside of work hours, there isn't really much they can do to stop you. <S> Don't send invitations to mailing lists where senior managers or HR might be copied. <S> (However also don't assume that immediate managers are against this meetup - some of them might be interested in joining you). <S> I would recommend waiting a week or so before meeting. <S> Sometimes that isn't healthy, for either the survivors or non-survivors. <S> It will also be necessary to be the tiniest bit discreet about company information. <S> Ordinary things you would have shared before shouldn't be a problem, but if the company cancelled a major project, or gave employees financial information right after the layoffs <S> , don't forget they are no longer part of the company. <A> To build upon the excellent answer by DJClayworth, I suggest you not only meet with the former colleagues, but keep an active relationship with them. <S> It has saved my team a lot of time and effort when former colleagues stopped by to chat and were happy to help us tie up the odd loose end on some problem they were working on before they were let go. <S> But it's not only about getting them to work for free. <S> This answer was inspired by this article by Alex Papadimoulis. <S> While I don't necessarily agree with everything he writes, there are certainly some very good points. <A> I think you should meet, your company can't dictate who you spend your free time with and your friends could do with some camaraderie right about now. <S> The only pitfall I would warn you of is that if the employed demographic is the one that made the invite, they are implicitly suggesting that they will foot the bill: <S> make sure you confirm this with the rest of the job-holders beforehand.
| However in the interests of not appearing to be in open rebellion against the company you should probably keep this relatively discreet, by which I mean don't put up posters advertising the meetup, and use company email with discretion. Those let go are going to be understandably angry in the first week or so, no matter how well the layoffs were handled, and during that time any conversation is going to be mostly about what utter, unforgivable, unrelenting bastards the company are. Keeping a network of alumni helps to improve the image of the company and often supplies a number of skilled people to hire.
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My manager has read out my Resignation Letter to my work colleagues, what should I do? I handed in my resignation letter due to being ill after getting knocked down by a car. I received two messages from two of my work colleagues stating that my manager had read out my resignation letter to the rest of my work shift, around 15-20 people. The resignation letter is confidential in itself, however my resignation letter contained some information about my health and the incident that occurred for me to stop working, clearly my manager has breached my confidentiality, what should I do and how should I go about it? <Q> Document this as good as you can (for future reference if needed) <S> and then let it go. <S> Regardless of whether this is illegal or not, there is no positive outcome that I can see. <S> You could spend time and money on a lawyer. <S> And then sue the company for damages? <S> This is very unlikely to be successful and can severely damage any prospect for future employment at that company or any other place who learns about this <S> You could make a stink and demand a letter of apology. <S> You can frame this and hang it in the bathroom if it makes you feel any better, but it's not going to undo the damage and both HR and your past boss <S> will hate you forever for making them jump through extra hoops. <S> Is there anything else you can think of? <S> What else would you want to happen? <S> What exactly do you want them to do? <S> The more you stir this up, the more attention it will get <A> We can't give legal advice here, and a lot of what you can do depends on the laws of your country. <S> First off, reading a resignation letter out loud is a horrible breach of trust, and you should absolutely report this incident to HR of the company you resigned from (Make sure to get as much documentation of this IN WRITING before doing that!). <S> If HR isn't cooperative or doesn't see this as a big deal, you should go straight to discussing this issue with a lawyer. <S> In many countrys publishing sensitive information obtained in an assumed-to-be-confidential manner is ridiculously illegal. <S> A lawyer can advise you on this. <S> If the HR department is cooperative you still might want to consult a lawyer, or try to resolve the situation with them amicably. <S> In conclusion, this is definitely not okay. <A> What's your objective? <S> The letter can't be unread. <S> Yes, it was a breach of confidentiality, but in two weeks everyone (except yourself) will have forgotten about it - unless you get an attorney involved. <S> Move on, recover from the accident and restart your career. <A> Anything you say to their HR, your former boss, etc. <S> can and will be used against you, should the situation escalate legally. <S> If you email your former HR you may make exactly the slip of tongue needed to take your old boss entirely off the hook. <S> Consulting with a lawyer is safe. <S> You do not need to sue or serve them papers of any kind and lawyers do not just randomly do this without your asking them to. <S> If your lawyer is pushy then find a better one. <S> Your city or country may offer other legal resources <S> but I'm not an expert here. <S> Maybe someone can post an answer filling out the kind of regional resources usually available. <S> Even consulting with a lawyer costs money. <S> Maybe they won't be bad consequences but you still should not be reckless. <S> I'm not sure whether there is any material upside for you. <S> If a lawyer wants to sue for damages treat that as a doctor telling you you need surgery: it's a serious operation, with lots of risk, can drag on and on and be costly, and you probably want a second opinion. <S> If you just want justice then you may have better options, but you are of course solidifying your former boss as an enemy instead of merely as a bully who doesn't otherwise care about you that much. <S> I understand that justice may be important to you <S> and I'm glad some people pursue it, even when it can probably only hurt them. <S> In this case, consulting with a lawyer or regional resources is step #1. <S> That's your decision.
| If confidentially is a real concern, try to stay constructive: You can write a message to the people who know, let them know that this was disclosed in error, and ask them politely to keep this to themselves. You need to talk to a lawyer before any interaction with your company. You have the option of just letting this go as any action you take will have consequences on your career.
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As an intern, is it wrong to stay silent? I'm an intern for 6 weeks as programmer (theoretically) - this is my first working experience ever and I'm unsure about a lot of things. The last 4 working days (I started on the 1st of June) were spent without ever contacting anyone, trying to make something that can be useful for the current project. Is it wrong? I have in general a hard time when it comes to communicating people. It indeed happened in some of the first days, but almost nothing since. What is the right behaviour? <Q> In general NO, you should not be silent. <S> At the moment I am in a similar position(or used to be..), as I am just about to finish my internship. <S> At the start I wasn't too sure how to handle lots of things, I was shy to ask when I encountered a problem and this resulted quite some issues , mainly with performance. <S> There were talks with my manager regarding my performance and why it was stalling. <S> I explained to him what my issues were and got some advice from him. <S> Since then, to be honest, things are going only the right way. <S> When I have a problem I try to fix it by my own(which <S> you should always try to do, at the end of the day you are there to learn!), but if this starts to take too much time I stand up for it and speak to someone. <S> Obviously, when you're stuck you need help, regardless who you get it from. <S> The guys which are already experienced in the product are the best place to turn for help. <S> As to the other benefits of not staying silent: this way you can form friendships, get help easier over time, satisfy your positions requirements, learn a lot about things which are not entirely focused on the thing you are doing at the moment(internal meetings, negotiations, other general stuff which applies to most jobs) <S> I suppose from time to time you will get a chance to go out with your co-workers just to socialise - going for a drink, bowling game or whatever <S> - this is a great opportunity to get to know them! <S> Do not miss it! <S> This will only make you feel more comfortable in the long run and nobody will think bad of you. <S> After all you are a human being. <S> Not to forget - for not contacting with other fellow co-workers you risk getting lower grades on your communication skills, or even on your performance skills. <S> You might not hear about this at all, but you can be sure that your manager is watching you closely. <A> Staying silent is not a good way to learn about the organization or the craft, nor is it a good way to create connections. <S> Do everything you can to make as much of an impression as you can. <S> Go out of your way to learn the work, the place, and the people. <S> Everyone is busy, obviously, but do you best to steal a few minutes and learn what they do. <S> Ask question about what you've been tasked with, nothing worse then finding out you've done it all wrong after you turn in your work. <A> Because you are an intern it is expected that you won't know much of anything. <S> You are depriving yourself of the opportunity to learn, and <S> your coworkers the opportunity to teach. <S> Do not underestimate the value you bring by giving your coworkers the opportunity to teach. <S> Teaching an intern or new employee forces one to review one's own knowledge, brush up on techniques and methods, and even question the validity of those. <S> I've personally found that when I've instructed others, It makes me sharper on the subject matter. <S> Reach out, ask, communicate, and sometimes just socialize. <S> It is never worth it to be silent. <A> As someone who really enjoys mentoring interns/inexperienced developers I'd say definitely don't stay silent! <S> As others have mentioned, you're not expected to know everything and in a well-organised company there should be time allocated for more senior developers to pass on their knowledge. <S> In the long run making you more productive benefits everyone. <S> A couple of tips: <S> There may be some periods (hopefully hours/days rather than weeks) which are real crunch periods and more junior developers may be expected to fend for themselves. <S> Generally these should be the exception, not the rule and it ought to be obvious when they're occurring. <S> Try to never ask the same question twice! <S> I always try to keep electronic notes to help me with this. <S> All that said <S> , I would never go as long as 4 days without checking in on a more junior developer assigned to me as I know <S> it can sometimes be difficult to approach someone you're not sure of their workload etc. <S> Quite often a quick 'how's it going' will open the door to some programming discussion which can save a lot of wasted time.
| By being silent you are depriving both yourself and your team of opportunities. Part of your job as an intern is to learn as much as possible, this cannot be done without communication. If you ever have some issues with the workplace working conditions - never stay silent about them, mention them in the first possible moment, so that actions can be taken. Asking questions is not a bad thing, provided that you did try to solve it yourself first.
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Is a university 'coop' degree title worth the money? My university charges us $500/semester (three times a year) for 'co-op fee.' For this money, all the school does is help you format your resume and give basic tips on how to do well in an interview. They also find jobs related to our program and forward them to us, however, they don't guarantee you get a job either. These are all things I can do by myself. I can save myself $1500 a year, fix my own resume, and easily find the co-op job postings that my school provides on the internet. Did I mention that co-op 'lectures' where you learn basic interview and resume skills are held every other week at 7 in the morning on a Saturday? I am thinking about dropping co-op name from my degree as it seems like a huge waste of time and money at this point. The only drawback is that I lose the 'Co-op' title from my degree name. I will still apply to jobs on semesters I have off and work for the experience, however, my university will not be involved. From a workplace perspective, is there a significant loss in my potential of getting hired if I drop the 'co-op' name from my degree? So basically, BScH Computer Science [Co-op] vs BScH Computer Science <Q> Long run the "Co-op" designation doesn't add much value. <S> The only point it comes into play is getting your first industry job. <S> The real value to the program is specific co-op experience. <S> Many employers will have term positions coinciding with the school semester that are specifically for co-op students. <S> Being in this program opens doors to student specific openings that you may not have outside of it. <S> My company hires 4-6 co-op engineering students each year and most of our entry level engineering hires come from this group. <S> I know that anyone applying for one of these positions who was not in the co-op program would immediately go in the "No" pile. <A> Yes. <S> Very empathically, Yes . <S> The experience of actually going out and gaining work experience is priceless when you're competing for jobs with hundreds, if not thousands of other applicants at the end of your program. <S> Mind you, getting a co-op when you have no work experience in the field can be a chore - after all, every other student is a competitor, and some have already completed a co-op or two, so they have an edge. <S> But, assuming you're successful in securing one at each stage that you're offered the opportunity you could end up working at 2 or 3 different companies during your time at school. <S> Not only do they typically pay better than any minimum wage job, but you're also getting a feel for different kinds of environments, experiencing a professional workplace, and learning new things. <S> Furthermore, impress a manager and you could line up part-time employment during the school year, a good reference for later in your career, or a job when you finish school. <S> It's not just win-win, it's win- win - win . <S> As for why going through your school is worth it(in my experience): <S> Your school has a reputation in the industry. <S> Companies approach them when they have co-op positions available and advertise on the school's website(not typically open to all students, only co-op ones). <S> These resources become available to you, so hunting a job down becomes a much easier process. <S> Schools also typically enforce a minimum wage (for us it was $14/hr) and their counsellors checked up on us part way through the 4 month term to make sure that the employer was treating us well, etc. <S> (if found lacking an employer is blacklisted and removed from their list of potential employers, which helps future students). <A> YES. <S> YES. <S> YES. <S> I am currently a student interning, and my friends who are in co-op have far better paying, well known companies giving them interviews. <S> That $500 is worth it for sure. <S> In my case, I had 3 total interviews for this term and 1 offer. <S> They had from 10-20 interview and several offers. <S> It also gives you a back-up choice when you graduate, if they have given you a verbal offer. <S> Folks who have no experience are at a massive disadvantage compared to those who do through co-op. <S> It shows that you have work experience, are trained to some degree for your career and able to work in a professional environment.
| Co-op work experience will give you a leg up when you graduate. All in all, worth it IMO.
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No contract extension because pregnancy? My wife, who has been in a contract role for almost a year with several extension, has been told today that her contract may not be extended after end of this month - due to contract extension issues. Her manager told this to her in the same meeting where she let her manager know that she is nearly 3 months pregnant. After the meeting she received handover related emails straight away. She is very upset and thinking about turning to HR. Is it worth it? Can she make anything out of this? <Q> She doesn't work for that company. <S> She is a contract worker. <S> If it really was because of her pregnancy, but it was at the end of her contract anyways <S> , then there is still nothing you can do. <S> A contract worker is not afforded the same worker protections as if you were an employee of the job site you were working at. <S> That is one of the many things that are both good and bad about working a contract job. <S> The way it sounds, I do not believe the contract ending and her saying she is pregnant are related. <S> Correlation does not imply causation. <S> I know that if I wanted to let go one of my contact workers I would discuss it with my team before hand. <S> I wouldn't just decide on the spot that the contract is up. <A> One of the major reasons companies use contract workers is because it is easy to get rid of them when you no longer need them. <S> You just don't renew the contract. <S> Normally contract workers receive a higher hourly rate of pay or some other compensation in exchange for this lack of stability. <S> I can't speak for other countries, but in the U.S., there's no law requiring an employer to give any reason at all for not renewing a contract. <S> "Don't need them anymore" or a vague "wasn't happy with their work" is plenty of reason. <S> If someone actually said, "we're not renewing you because you're pregnant", they might be liable for a sex discrimination lawsuit. <S> But even if that was the real reason, if they never said that -- or worse for them, put it in writing -- <S> I don't see how you'd have much of a case. <S> You can win discrimination suits based on statistical arguments and a pattern of behavior. <S> Like if they've had 10 other employees in the past 5 years who became pregnant and all were immediately terminated the instant the company found out, that might be evidence for a lawsuit. <S> You'd have to check with a lawyer on that. <S> But if you have nothing more than what you said in your post, I doubt you have any grounds. <S> I am not a lawyer. <S> If you really want to pursue this, you should check with a lawyer. <S> Whether the reason was her pregnancy, that the company was unhappy with her work (for valid or invalid reasons), or just that they didn't need her any more, there's little to be gained by fighting it. <S> My advice would be to just move on. <A> On thing about a contract is that it has flexibility on both sides. <S> Neither party are required to extend the contract. <S> Nearing the end of a contract the company may ask to extend it. <S> It is up to the other party to accept. <S> This is the reason that contractors are paid a better hourly rate - they forfeit benefits (holiday pay, sickness, ...). <S> So I am afraid that your partner has no recourse.
| If your wife is truly a contract worker there is nothing that HR can do. Realistically, I think she is better off to just look for another job.
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How to deal with a boss who does not get involved in any social events? Maybe this is common at most workplaces, but I find working hours to be so much longer and less fun because most of the communication between my boss and us are just about work. I have been in the team for almost 2 years. We never had any team lunch or team events. Even worse, for the past 2 X'mas parties, my boss never showed up and I was the only person in my team who attended. As a new employee I really had difficulties meeting others at the firm because my boss did not introduce me to them. Throughout all the time, I do get the feeling that my boss would prefer the way as is instead of making the environment more fun. I am really thinking about leaving the firm now because I think the atmosphere is getting depressing and this just generate negative energy. What are your thoughts? <Q> After 2 years, you should have introduced yourself to plenty of people. <S> You can't blame your boss for the fact that you haven't, or demand that he be any more social than you apparently are. <S> The problem here is you, not the boss. <A> Your boss is not interested in socialising with staff. <S> I don't see this as a reason to quit: realistically you are there to work, not socialise. <S> Many people would be happier working this way, myself included. <S> As a boss, I barely attend any of the functions although I pay for them. <S> I don't drink these days, but when I did, I would never get drunk with staff members; it changes relationships and I could possibly make a fool of myself (seen plenty of bosses and managers do so) and lose respect. <S> So I'd either leave them to it, or make a brief appearance at the start then quietly leave. <S> My advice if you feel strongly enough about it is to get some like minded people together and start a social club and organise your own events, finance them through the club, or even get sponsors if you want to. <S> I have seen people do this successfully and have a growing group of people interested. <A> I do not think that it is a boss' responsibility to make the work environment fun. <S> It is more like removing all those road blocks so you can work productively. <S> Obviously, socializing is part of a productive work environment, to varying degrees depending on one's personality. <S> Extraverted people load their batteries when interacting with others, while introverts gain energy from alone time or thinking time. <S> Personally, I love having my own office and not having to connect with others except for work issues, but might have my one or two people even at work I might build a deeper relationship with. <S> If the environment does not fit you, change it either by investing yourself or going somewhere else. <S> As others have said, it is your own responsibility to connect. <A> Keep in mind that people differ. <S> Some people find functions (with loud music and free booze) so much fuuuun . <S> Some people are the opposite and are stimulated by (perhaps 1-to-1) intelligent conversation - they would hate going to the <S> aforementioned FUN work function or team building event <S> (they would return from it stressed-out, they would not be able to meet people or converse with any). <S> (I'm speaking from experience, me being the latter and my last workplace (or <S> at least their social committee responsible for functions, which included the CEO's wife) being the former. <S> I did not attend many functions, and did not work there very long.) <S> So one suggestion would be to engage with your boss on his level. <S> Perhaps over a coffee break, a cigarette in the smoking area, or at the water cooler at work? <S> The same, of course, counts for those other colleagues that you feel you need to know. <S> If that does not deliver sufficient results to your liking, after serveral attempts, perhaps you are not well-matched to your workplace. <S> Update: it may be well worth your while to do some assessment to get more clarity on what makes you tick as a person and what you think about yourself. <S> I've found this free Meyers-Briggs-based site useful in the past without buying the premium content. <A> I can contribute to this as the kind of person who is quite shy and has difficulty easily getting to know people. <S> It definitely took me a while, certainly a couple of months, to feel comfortable enough with everyone in my department (15 people or so) and a couple of years to meet and know everyone in the company (about 60-70 people) on a friendly basis. <S> So, even though this may take time, it is perfectly normal to have to fend for yourself socially in this kind of setting. <S> There is nothing stopping you from organising social activities with people in your organisation if you'd like to. <S> I went out for coffee with my main team-mate a couple of times a month, and that turned into a regular outing with our department. <S> Our boss didn't come every time, and he wasn't expected to. <S> If you are feeling like the atmosphere in your workplace is a difficult one, then it would definitaly be a good idea to consider why. <S> If it's just a social thing, then start by creating an activity with one or two teammates. <S> It's possible there are other issues too. <S> Is it stressful? <S> Are you not being supported in your work? <S> Perhaps there are other reasons why the atmosphere is like this. <S> It's not usually due a lack of social activities (many companies function without them), although that's possible.
| If you want those sorts of activities then you should start a social club or something similar. It is unrealistic to expect your boss to introduce you to everyone in the company.
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Older IT worker, out of market for 2 years: What are some good approaches to get back in the field? What would be the best approach for an experienced IT professional who has been out of the market for two years and close to retirement? Specifically, how can I translate my experience and skill with older technologies to the present job market, and what new technologies would be best to learn to increase one's marketability. Are skill such as web design, PHP, Python, Ruby, C#, worth learning, or are there other technologies and or job positions I should consider? <Q> I was in the same position after suffering a stroke eight years ago and was out of the field for five years Right now, there is a dearth of IT people <S> so age isn't the career killer that it once was. <S> There are plenty of "legacy systems" out there that the younger generation does not want to touch as they see them as 'career killers'. <S> Look for those kinds of jobs and study some newer technologies on your own time and you will be able to do well. <S> If you already know VB or C/C++, learning C# would be a breeze. <S> I'd suggest C# regardless as it is in demand everywhere and isn't going away. <A> You are not wasting your time by learning new skills. <S> If for nothing else, it keeps your mind busy and preventing mental atrophy. <S> And it is never bad to have new skills under your belt when you are looking for employment. <S> Problem here is, age discrimination. <S> Even though they can not ask you how old you are, by looking at your background (I am pretty sure you have a Linked <S> In page which shows a degree with a graduation date or some other social media profile for that matter) or just by talking to you in an interview, they can guess your age give or take few years. <S> And unfortunately, in the IT industry, where younger and more adept to new technologies population is coming out in hoards and outsourcing so much of IT operations to overseas is so easy, there is almost no role for an older worker at an IT shop, unless you are going for a management position. <S> And unless you have prior management experience, no one will ever look at you as a possible manager. <S> I will be honest. <S> The job outlook is grim for the old timers in IT industry. <S> But one thing is on your side: The Experience and every shop needs at least a few, extremely experienced subject matter experts. <S> My suggestion is to look for those opportunities, by networking with others and finding companies, suffering from conditions that you have the answers for. <S> Those companies more than likely are not aware of their problems. <S> It is your initiative to explain your value to them. <A> To break back in to the field you need to utilise everything you already have. <S> Primarily at your age you should have a network of people in the industry who know you. <S> You need to contact these people and see if they can be useful. <S> And if they know anywhere you can apply that would be a good fit for you in terms of what you already have. <S> The skills are more problematic, but nothing has changed that drastically in two years. <S> If you're not already familiar with PHP and SQL you need to ask yourself why (these have been around a LOT longer than two years), I wouldn't advise learning a bit and trying to get a job based on that. <S> The people you're competing with haven't just learnt it yesterday. <S> Make a list of what you are strong with and look for something that suits, you can work on other stuff later. <S> Don't be shy to use your network, it's a major reason for having one. <A> Being an expert in an older technology isn't always a bad thing either - a lot of Cobol programmers made a killing when Y2K rolled around and companies needed to update older code. <S> I am sure there are shops using Business Objects. <S> Some of them may have a developer older than you who is about to retire. <S> Guess how many 20-somethings know anything about Business Objects? Or would even apply to those jobs in the first place? <S> Depending on where you live it might be a good idea to search nationwide for "remote opportunities" - work from home. <S> The company that desperately needs you might be 500 miles away. <S> As for learning new skills, pick just one that seems viable and dig into it. <S> Don't worry about becoming an expert, just worry about getting to the point where you are productive and know how to research the bits you don't yet know. <A> Other than the technical skills suggested by the answers so far, you should invest yourself in some soft skills for an updated workplace. <S> Some people do not want to discriminate older workers, but some attitudes could turn off the HR and the hiring managers right away. <S> You've asked a question here and it is a good indication that you know where to look for some information. <S> Here are some soft skills that may be useful for you: <S> Keep an open mind: If you meet someone whose ethnical background is not familiar with you, do not apply stereotypes right away. <S> Team work: <S> Rarely any work is an individual effort nowadays. <S> Develop a business sense <S> : Understand why some products thrives but some don't. <S> This will help you in choosing the technologies to pick up. <S> Good luck!
| For more mature people a management position might be more suitable and easier to get, so look at all your options. Proficiency in SQL is always valuable.
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Friend/Co-Worker isn’t a Fan of my Girlfriend Recently I have encountered a problem. I am part of a group in my workplace almost from the time I started working at my firm. We have obviously become close friends and know about not only our professional but personal lives. My problem is with one of my friends/co-group member. He met my girlfriend and recently he has stated to refer to as Lady Evil. Just because she admires my professionalism and looks out for me has either made him jealous or something and it’s bugging me. It’s affecting my professional relationship with him especially when he mentions the nickname to the other members in the group and I’m glad he doesn’t say that to her face or we’ll most definitely end up in a fight. What advice can you offer me that would not only help me maintain my professional relationship while also keeping my relationship with both him and my girlfriend intact? <Q> In a one on one conversation with them, "I don't like you calling {name} Lady Evil. <S> I would appreciate it if you would stop." <S> If it is a misunderstanding establishing this boundary should be enough. <A> You have a personal relationship with this person, simply ask him to stop. <S> It doesn't matter why he's calling her <S> that, whether he thinks it's justified or not, or his intentions; if you feel disrespected he should have the courtesy to understand that and put an end to it. <S> We can hope, at least. <A> What this comes down to is boundaries. <S> How close you guys are will affect how diplomatic you should be. <S> A very close friend you suddenly stop spending time with in favor of your new girlfriend might feel abandoned, and act up a bit (a sign of immaturity, but not necessarily that he's a terrible person). <S> In this situation you should certainly ask him to stop slandering her, but also analyze your own behavior and maybe make more of an effort to reconnect with him. <S> There also exists a possibility - if this is a close friend who typically has your back - that he perceives something in this girl that you don't see, in which case it's also worth it to talk things out and find out his point of view. <S> I still think that his behavior is immature, however. <S> If, however, he's more of a "buddy" toward whom you feel no special loyalty, and is severely overstepping his bounds <S> then you should not hessitate to firmly enforce your boundaries. <S> The next time he says something take him aside and in no uncertain terms tell him that you don't appreciate his attitude, and would like him to stop. <S> You need to decide the level of access you wish to allow these people (work mates) into your life. <S> Consider this: if you were to quit your job tomorrow, would you maintain close contact with any of them? <S> If the answer is no, or that you're not sure, then that's a sure-fire sign that maybe you should slowly separate them from some aspects of your life. <S> Set up boundaries so that they understand that their opinions on your personal life are off limits. <S> This does not mean that you need to be rude, or never hang out with them, but it does mean that some conversations, opinions, or developments in your life should remain private, and that some lines of inquiry should be deflected in the future. <S> For example, the only reason this person is calling your GF "Lady Evil" is because someone in that circle brought her up - why were you guys even talking about her in the first place?
| No need to be rude, but definitely make it clear that you're being serious, and be prepared to escalate things, or maybe even cut social (outside-work) contact with him if his attitude persists.
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Was I too aggressive with this interview question Several days ago, I interviewed a candidate as part of a team for a Info Sec. analyst position. I myself work in IT Audit. One of the questions I asked was: If management were to express disagreement or reluctance with a concern you raised, tell me how you would handle such a conflict? I have always been a fan of the situational interview style, as I believe one's past behavior is a strong predictor of one's future behavior in similar circumstances.Today I received some feedback that this question came across as "Aggressive" and a bit strong. Was this question indeed too aggressive? How could I have worded it better for interviewing future candidates? <Q> It's a leading question, unsure what you expect to achieve with it. <S> I'd just answer "No idea <S> , it would depend on the particular situation." <S> So yes, it's a bit aggressive because it doesn't have a clear answer. <S> In real life they might act totally different. <S> And most people would be digging to work out what answer you wanted to hear rather than what they would actually do anyway. <A> To me it looks good, at least on paper. <S> But how the other person perceives the questions depends upon many other factors as well, like the tone of voice, body language and other subtle messages communicated sub consciously. <S> You can always introspect and ask for more details on feedback as what exactly made it look like aggressive, and what can be improved and taken care of. <A> If you are interested in their past performance you could ask more directly: <S> Can you tell me of a time where you had a concern and raised it to management and management expressed disagreement or reluctance? <S> What did you do? <S> If you are interviewing a person who already worked as an Info Sec. <S> analyst, they should be able to come up with a past situation and tell you what they did. <A> Was this question indeed too aggressive? <S> How could I have worded it better for interviewing future candidates? <S> Talk to HR (or whoever expressed that your question was "too aggressive" and "strong"). <S> Learn when they want you to do and not do during interviews. <S> It doesn't matter if you are a fan of a particular question or style of questions. <S> And it doesn't matter if people on the interwebs think it was too aggressive or not aggressive enough. <S> The interview isn't about your preferences - it's about the company and finding a good employee. <S> Learn what the company considers appropriate, then do what they want you to do. <A> From an interviewee's point of view: I'm not sure this question would reveal much. <S> There are some questions where the candidate has probably learned an answer off by heart after getting some job-seeking advice, and one of them is how to handle conflict in the workplace. <S> I am sure <S> if you asked this, you'd get their standard "conflict" answer. <S> Some answers have suggested asking that the candidate provides an example of when it happened, but I'm not sure this would be much better. <S> They will still be simply telling you what they think you want to hear. <S> Some people will never have had this situation, or have had it <S> but the management was able to assure them that there was nothing to worry about. <S> If they say "that's never happened to me", they will be afraid of how you will judge them, as people giving job-seeking advice have told them that it's not good to be without an example. <S> So now you have no way of knowing <S> are they just making up or exaggerating an example? <A> I don't think it is a fair question because most companies, teams, managers have some guidelines on how to go about this kind of thing. <S> Some are written and unwritten. <S> I've worked at places where it was acceptable to pound your fist on the table until you get everyone to hear your point of view. <S> Never give in. <S> Never surrender. <S> At other places, you'd be fired for doing that, so you just agree all the time. <S> So how does my past experience help you when I answer this question? <S> You learn to wait and see how these debates are handled. <S> People like to think they're upfront about this <S> , "I don't want any 'yes' men on my team." except every time someone disagrees, they get yelled at without an rational reason why from management. <S> People have different temperaments and this question may let you know when someone tends to do, but there can be a lot of variability in different settings and circumstances. <S> It's difficult to tell people you prefer a certain type of behavior because they'll just alter their answer in hopes of getting the job. <S> You can try it and see if you can tell who is bluffing or not, but that's pretty difficult most of the time. <S> If getting along with the team is so important, they should spend as much time as possible with job candidates. <S> Hopefully, you can find the answer without asking the question. <S> If someone thinks the question is too aggressive, they may not be a fit for your team either. <S> I like being upfront, so aggressive would not be how I would describe this question.
| When asking questions in interviews it's best to structure them with a clear goal in mind, not to pose them in order to practice psychoanalysis on the interviewee, because interviews are stressful situations for some, any data you think you gained on them is suspect. I think it is a perfectly reasonable question to ask, and answering this could reveal many important aspect of candidate's personality.
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Is it okay to speak openly about the current job when applying to another job? So let's say I work in a company but I am open for applying to other companies. And while updating my resume I wondered if it is okay to mention the name of product that I currently work on or responsible of, or/and what does the application do and how does it do it. And as Non-Technical, to mention why I like it but I am applying to another job. If it is okay, do I mention that in the resume or in the interview once I get it? And how could I approach the new job? Edit: I work as a Software Engineer and I spend most of my time writing and reviewing codes. The product is a hardware/software system and it is commercial and customers are using it already. I did not sign any contracts. I would like to say what does the application do exactly and how does it do it because I feel it will support my application to mention that I can maintain/develop such a system and solve such a problem (product's function is to solve a certain problem). <Q> NDAs and Classified Work Know what you signed when you joined the company. <S> If you signed anything about not telling people what it is <S> you are working on then you cannot. <S> If you are unsure check with your manager or HR. <S> Outside of those two things if you did not sign something <S> and you are comfortable with talking about it in an everyday conversation with people <S> then it can go on the resume. <S> And as Non-Technical, to mention why I like it <S> but I am applying to another job. <S> I would save this for the interview. <S> Your resume should be focused and all the space on it is precious. <S> Also keep it positive, if you go negative about aspects of things you did not like, it will hurt you. <A> You have to be careful. <S> You can mention some things if the product is known to the world at large. <S> However, let's take it to an extreme: <S> Suppose the product you are currently working on is Global Thermonuclear War . <S> (You'll have the full power of the US government breathing down your back if you do.) <S> Even if your product you work on is much, much more mundane than Global Thermonuclear War, it still might well be something that your current employer views as intellectual property. <S> While they don't have people carrying guns, they do have lawyers. <S> Even if what you worked on is not intellectual property, there is a better approach than talking about the boring details of the product you worked on. <S> Talk instead about the tools, techniques, and tricks <S> you learned while on the job. <S> Those are the things your future employer will want to leverage rather than the specific product on which you worked. <A> As others have said, what you say in an interview should not go beyond what you could say to someone working at a competing company -- and you really should already know the rules for that! <S> This isn't generally a problem. <S> What the interviewer needs to know is how you have been applying your skills, not what you have been applying them to. <S> You can generally find a way to tell them what you have been doing and <S> it's impact on the project without having to disclose proprietary details about exactly how you made it work or the product/project it was used in. <S> You may want to practice that in advance before going into interviews. <S> Which is good advice generally -- it help a lot if you know what messages you want to give them, and how you want to phrase them for best impact, before the interview starts.
| So again talk with you manager or HR to determine this. The company might allow certain things to be said like name of products but none of the details about how the product works. There are some things you do not talk about, and that's one of them.
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should I continue to sit while my boss is standing & talking I dont want to make any beginner mistakes at my entry level job. I work in the fashion industry (eyewear & optics). They value professionalism. My boss comes to my desk and talks while I am browsing my computer. I read somewhere that when you talk, you should have the same eye level with the speaker. So I stand and talk too. Is it right? My boss looks at me a bit surprised. <Q> <A> When you have a serious talk, it's best to be at the same eye-level. <S> This is usually when you have a scheduled meeting or expect to have a longer talk about a topic. <S> Usually, these talks are not held next to your desk, though. <S> When someone just comes over to ask a quick question, standing up can be excessive. <S> If they expect to be gone in a few seconds, they will probably not want to make you bother getting up. <S> This is almost always the case if someone drops by your desk unannounced and doesn't start with "Can I talk to you for a moment?". <S> In addition, sometimes people stop by your desk because they want to see something on your screen. <S> In this case, standing up is actually problematic because you won't be able to show. <A> I wouldn't stand; it probably would seem intimidating, or at least odd. <S> I've been that manager stopping by and would not expect someone to stand. <S> Definitely offering them a chair if they're sticking around is a good thing to do. <S> One other thing I feel I should point out, since you mention a 'beginner' and 'entry level job': make sure to give your boss (or anyone, really) <S> your full attention if they stop by. <S> This is a no brainer for some people <S> but I've known plenty of others who will continue to work, look at their phone, or whatever during a conversation (and I catch myself doing it now <S> and then). <S> When someone stops by, push your chair away from your desk and turn to face them. <S> Focus on the conversation until it's concluded. <A> Depends greatly on the situation and your workplace culture. <S> The classic example is at a dinner party look to the wife of or lady hosting the party. <S> Same thing applies here. <S> When your boss is talking with other members of your team do they stand? <S> If not then you should not. <S> Also if you have any medical conditions that make it uncomfortable to stand or get up then obviously your health trumps the workplace culture. <A> This is exactly what happened to me today at work, I'm a newbie and the Financial Director come down to introduce himself. <S> He dropped by my desk, a truly traditional Englishman from what I could gather. <S> Now, I stood up like a dart, just seemed instinctual and <S> 'kinda' gestured to sit down once he shook my hand. <S> So I'd say, yes, in this situation (I guess it's from the military) <S> it was the correct thing to do. <A> Watch others in the department; those who have been in the company for a few years. <S> Just do what they do, and toe the company culture line. <S> Personally, as a show of respect, I normally stand and say thank-you as they depart. <S> You may laugh at this, but I am an avid tea drinker, and have a small collection of teas piled on my desk. <S> I typically have a largish French press of tea sitting next to me as I work. <S> I always keep a few empty paper cups handy, and offer visitors a cup of tea. <S> It's a great show of goodwill. <S> Some chuckle a bit and decline, but those from tea-drinking cultures tend to really appreciate this offer. <S> Then you end up sharing teas, and trying new stuff. <S> You'd be surprised how many other tea drinkers you connect with in this way. <S> There is a certain peace associated with tea. <A> If standing up seems forced or out of place <S> then I'd advise to stay seated. <S> This scenario occurs frequently in my office and there are two instances where standing up seems to be appropriate. <S> If you are shaking somebody's hand (this applies outside of work also) <S> If there is something your manager wants you to look at something that isn't easy to see while sitting down (i.e. whiteboard, a piece of paper, etc.) <S> Also keep in mind that your manager probably cares much more about the conversation you are having rather than whether you are standing or sitting.
| May I offer an alternative: if one is available, offer your visitor a chair. In my experience -- in my culture -- folks who are only visiting your workstation briefly do not expect you to get up and may prefer to remain standing themselves. When in situations that you do not know what the proper etiquette is you look at what other people are doing. Imo, Standing is a bit much--it almost feels confrontational.
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How to react to manager sending me mail on my personal address? A few months ago, I decided to quit my job, resulting in 3 months notice, reduced to 1,5 months through negotiation. Things were going quite terribly as I was completely unmotivated by the work I was assigned. I kept reading my mail, answering it and working, though very slowly and not very well, but what you could call my manager started sending mail to me (with mostly negative content regarding my motivation) on my personal address.At the time, I had already found a new job and was only focused on hanging until the end of my notice, so I could leave and never look back. I did not answer the mail received on my personal inbox, nor did I mentioned anything to anyone about it as their content was professional and not insulting or inappropriate, and I think it was the correct decision in that particular situation. I was wondering : what would have been the right course of action if I was not close to leaving the company ? I could let it go because I only had a few weeks left, but what if I hadn't quit, and she kept emailing me on my personal address on a regular basis ? It is a small company, so no HR. <Q> If you weren't on your way out, the correct response would have been to ask why they weren't sending to your work address. <S> There might have been a good reason, eg work mail being archived and trying to keep the criticism off the record. <S> If there wasn't a good reason, you would ask them to do so and stop using your personal mail for work communication unless they were trying to find you for an of-hours emergency. <A> I would not done anything with those emails for several days and then replied ignoring the content of the mail with one line saying something like: "Hi, <S> Sorry I don't check this very often, can you please make sure you send these to my work address in future as I'm not likely to see these. <S> Thanks" <S> It might beggar belief that you don't read that personal email- <S> (but there's nothing saying the address she has is your primary account) <A> I personally don't consider a personal address (email or snail mail) to be sacrosanct. <S> It's nothing more than another way to get hold of me. <S> In fact, because of delays in the onboarding process at my current employer, I occasionally get email at my personal address even now, though I have 2 work emails, one at my employer and one at the company to which I'm contracted. <S> In the future, I'd set up an email address specifically to give to employers. <S> It's particularly easy if you have your own domain, just set a new recipient. <S> That gives you the option to shut the email down if you run into this problem again.
| What I would have done in your situation is just ignore it.
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How can I politely tell a business acquaintance that their behavior is inappropriate? I met someone recently who seemed to share some of my technical interests and we started discussing doing some work together. However, after emailing back and forth a few times they added me to their email blast, which updates their "fans" on all their projects and events, without asking my permission. This is a source of concern to me. If they do this to me, they may well do it to anyone I happen to introduce them to. I would like somehow to politely let them to know that they should at least ask permission before they do this. <Q> Just a firm polite email, that says thanks for considering you for inclusion on the list, but could he please remove you. <S> I think that's better than filtering his mails as it gives him the hint that he shouldn't automatically do this. <S> I wouldn't worry about introducing him to others, it's unlikely they'll judge you for that <A> What happens to others is their own issue, not yours. <S> You are not the email etiquette police in the office or in his circle of friends. <S> So, stay out of making generalized statements. <S> If you somehow value this relationship and do not put a strain on it, just create a email filtering rule (any modern email client have these filtering rules) and put whatever comes from this person, (probably with a certain keyword in it) into a read-later folder or directly into trash. <S> If you are filing them somewhere, and if he asks you something about the content of one of his golden pieces, you can tell him that you did not time to read it yet but will give your feedback after doing so, and go to your email archives and read it, if it is an important matter. <S> Or you can say something like " hey <S> , you know I gets tons of email everyday and in order not to lose it <S> , I created this filter, it automatically files your messages in a folder for later reading ", which in my opinion means " what you are sending me is garbage but due to my relationship with you, I do not have the heart to tell you that, they are garbage " <A> Be direct Make a polite request and ask them to please remove you from their email list. <S> You could even say something along the lines of I took a look at the first couple emails, and I certainly appreciate you thinking of me, but that is not something I am interested in. <S> Would you please remove my email from this list? <S> Thanks! <S> Advise <S> As for people you introduce to this individual, don't be afraid to take them aside privately and advise them about the email list. <S> Pass along the same advice to politely ask to be excluded if indeed they find themselves added to the list. <S> It could turn out that the person added you to the list simply because of the shared interests and was acting in what they thought was in your best interests (and not merely spamming). <S> Filter <S> If all else fails, you can still filter these emails straight to archive or trash, and no harm is done to you or them. <S> HTH
| If you don't mind straining your relationship with this person, go to him and tell him flat out that you already are receiving too many email messages and if he could take you out of this distribution list.
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I feel that I'm too dumb for my job - what am I supposed to do in this position? I am currently interning at a hardware/software company. Two months ago, I was assigned to a machine learning project that I am extremely interested in. It's relatively math intensive, which is great because I love math. In addition, by their own admission, it's not something that other people on my team know how to complete right off the top of their heads (like many other intern tasks or projects at my workplace). My team members are putting a lot more trust in me than I thought they would, and that is both flattering and immensely motivating. I've learned a lot so far, I love working on this project, and I am definitely grateful for this opportunity. But I feel like I'm too dumb to be working on this project. I feel as if anyone else at work would be able to do a better job than me, and do it faster. What is the right thing to do? <Q> You are an intern. <S> Everyone else is supposed to be able to do the job better and faster than you. <S> At some point in the future you will be a junior developer, then you are supposed to be better and faster than the intern, equal to other juniors, and not as good as more experienced people. <S> But also consider this: You see your own strong and weak sides. <S> You see other people's strong sides because they show them; you don't usually see their weak sides because they don't show them. <S> So what you see is biased against you. <S> In reality, you are better than you think. <A> I've been working with students and interns for a while now, and, in my experience leading them, you never expect them to know a lot, because, being interns, their "real world" knowledge is very limited, what you really are looking for is young people with the right attitude, who enjoys, or at least are willing to, team work, because, in the end, you know eventually they are going to learn how to do things, and, the great thing about working with interns is you get to teach them how to do things your way , so, their lack of knowledge is, in a way, an asset. <S> So, to answer your question directly, you are supposed to show that you are doing your best to accomplish your assignments, that you are learning and that you are willing to listen to advice and to take critics to your work positively and trying to improve. <A> I feel as if anyone else at work would be able to do a better job than me, and do it faster. <S> While that may or may not be true, the relevant fact is that everyone else there already has things to do . <S> If a company saved every task for the person who would do it best, very little would ever actually get done. <A> A degree of feeling inadequate is to be expected if you are in a nurturing environment that encourages employee development. <S> They should taking you out of your comfort zone and building up the fringes of your capabilities. <S> Conversely, you would quickly tire of a position that only provides you with tasks you have mastered. <S> Try to see this opportunity as just that. <S> Continue to be humbly grateful for the opportunity they have provided you. <S> I suggest learning as much as you can, admit when you don't know/understand something, ask questions wherever you feel the need to, and do everything in your power to meet the goals they've laid out. <S> That being said, if you feel that you are so completely in over your head, that you provide/receive little value or are struggling to meet the base requirements, it would be wise to bring this to the attention of management.
| It sounds like you're doing great, but it might be useful for reassurance to get your supervisor to confirm that you are meeting expectations - or indeed exceeding them.
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Should I leave two short term jobs off of my resume? I have only just graduated University and plan on attending graduate school. In the past I've held part-time positions, and some of them only lasted a few months. Mostly this is because they were not willing to work with my school schedule and I had a major that required a lot of time dedication. I'm wondering if I should leave these jobs off of my resume, or would that just hurt me more? I only want a part-time job again as this time I'll be living on my own, but I'm worried if I will come off as a liar or look like I'm trying to hide something. I've never been fired but every time I'm asked for why I left a position I can't think of much to put down without sounding like I won't be able to handle a job in graduate school as well. Could anyone offer some advice? <Q> Lots of people take part time jobs while financing their studies, this is actually a good sign to me. <S> It tells me an interviewee is actually capable of getting up on time in the morning and making his way to work. <S> Which for low level jobs is one of the most important factors. <S> My advice is to mention the part time jobs and that you were in school at the time. <S> If asked why you left, just say the jobs weren't compatible with your schedule, so you left. <S> That happens and is perfectly reasonable and understandable. <A> Your resume is your personal sales brochure. <S> You only put on it things that will help you get a job. <S> There are only two reason to put a job on a resume: 1) <S> You want the hiring manager to know about it 2) not putting it on would create a gap in your history that might cause the hirer to assume something worse than really happened. <S> As you get later in life, and have more jobs to list, you might find yourself omitting whole jobs - even relevant ones - if they make your resume too long. <S> Of course if an employer specifically asks for all previous employment yo do have to tell them. <S> But that's usually long after they have seen your resume. <A> The ideal solution is to leave the short term jobs on your LinkedIn profile, have the link to that on your resume and then change the title of your jobs to say for example "Relevant Experience" and you can choose to indicate further job experience available on LinkedIn <A> Avoid gaps Demonstrate job-holding skills. <S> No matter how good your grades, they are more impressive if you were also working at the same time. <S> Combining work and college demonstrates good time management skills. <S> Give potential employers an accurate view of how flexible or inflexible you time will be. <S> At first sight, the last of these might be seen as a disadvantage. <S> However, it is not to your benefit to get into a job and find your employer expects you to be available on an arbitrary afternoon, even if it means missing lectures for a class in which you are enrolled. <S> Your time may be a bit more flexible as a graduate student than as an undergraduate, and you can discuss that in your cover letter.
| There are several advantages to leaving the jobs on your resume at this time, some of which have already been discussed in other answers and comments:
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Should I bring my age into account when enquiring about a job? I am a student who is going to move to Melbourne, Australia (from Cairns, Australia), when I am in Melbourne I hope to get a job as a website developer. I have a reasonably large amount of experience in the area (I've been working for a local web development company for 2 years now). My goal is to be paid a similar hourly amount as people with a comparable ability level, even if they are older than I am, and I am worried that if I bring up my age (I'll be 17 when I move to Melbourne) in my initial contact with the company, that they might think I have a lesser skill set than other potential candidates, even if my portfolio and references disagree. <Q> In general 17 is too young an age to be taken seriously in terms of paying the same even with a good reference. <S> It's an unfortunate fact of life, but it is based on a bit more than age. <S> Things like the ability to work in a team of older people, presentation and outside commitments, people automatically expect youngsters to be less mature and dependable. <S> There's just too much going on in their lives. <S> In saying that, entry level jobs pay pretty much the same to anyone and if you get one, do a solid job and impress with your professionalism, employers soon forget your age. <S> So while it's a bit of a drawback at the start, it's not a barrier 6 months or a year down the track when you have proved yourself. <S> I see no need to hide your age at the start, if it's a problem with the employer, it's not going to be less of a problem after they have taken the time and expense to interview you. <S> Also salary negotiations aren't (normally) done on first contact, they're usually done near the end of the hiring process. <A> The main problem here would be to prove that you have the same ability that your said co-workers. <S> And it's not only about technical ability but also about team working, reliability and so on. <S> So whatever the kind of company you go on, you'll need to wait to prove that you're as relialable than your co workers. <S> Don't aim for "the same salary" than your co workers, comparing salary between employees is often a bad idea, and even while having the same ability than you some of them will have more responsabilities, so a best paid. <S> Adn of course some company just use the fact <S> you're young to paid you less, that's why they hire young people. <A> The first things on your mind should be: <S> Do I have economic value? <S> Does my potential employer understand my value? <S> What can I do to make the company more money / value? <S> If you're really talking about capitalism, these are the things that should be on the forefront of your mind. <S> These do not revolve specifically around age. <S> That being said, you seem to be self conscious about your age. <S> You seem to think that your skills won't be valued because of your age. <S> When you reach a situation like this <S> and you realize that you may perceive the situation different than the other party (e.g. your employer), <S> don't immediately assume that they are wrong. <S> They may be right in that your age may limit your value to the company if all other qualifications seem equivalent. <S> More experienced people (and employees) tend to understand many intangibles about business that make them more attractive: <S> They are more self assured / confident (perhaps you are proving this right by being self-conscious about your age?) <S> They understand the life cycle of product development (budgets, ambiguities, good managers, bad bosses, how to ride out the storm, when to be worried, when not to worry) <S> They know what information and productivity to provide (not everything is about how well you write code or <S> how advanced your newest design is compared to the existing design) <S> Older people are not always better, but more experienced people can see patterns in development and business that transcend merely the newest techniques / programming language / algorithm / trends. <S> Don't worry about your age. <S> If you really have more value than your potential employer offers you, make your case. <S> If they do believe you, you'd better live up to what you represented. <S> If they don't believe you, go seek out another offer and work at a different place. <S> If you can't find another job, maybe you're not worth what you thought you were worth.
| The best you can do is to know how much the paid someone of your age and show you worth more.
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Compensating a recruitment agency for their unreciprocated efforts Currently I am concluding a period of several weeks of going through job offers and interviews in order to find a new job. During this time, I was assisted by several recruitment agencies. All of the agencies did a good job in my view, but one of them really stood out in terms of service and dedication. This agency's recruiters were very friendly and obliging, sometimes calling me multiple times a day to supply me with updates regarding new job offers. The majority of job offers that I got resulted from this agency's efforts. Unfortunately though, after weighing all the factors, I will most probably decide for a job that came from another agency. From the point of view of the agency hightlighted in the previous paragraph, my case was therefore a total waste of time and resources. This makes me feel bad about my decision and I'm wondering if there are ways of compensating them for their efforts other than choosing one of their jobs (all of which are overall quite a bit worse than my favorite option). <Q> Let them know that it is just the best decision for you, your career, and family. <S> Beyond that, there is no reason to do anything more or feel guilty. <S> Job hunting is vicious and you should only be looking out for you and your family. <S> They should understand and not have any hard feelings as offers can crop up out of nowhere. <A> Sending them a personal letter of thanks will undoubtedly be well appreciated. <S> Telling all your friends, and anybody else, what a great job they did will have the most concrete benefit. <S> Recruitment agencies thrive on recommendations. <S> Tell your friends and your social media contacts. <A> The one time I dealt with a recruiter that really seemed to take extra effort and understand my match to potential companies, it ended in the same way - a couple of useful leads <S> but I ended up taking another opportunity. <S> What I did <S> : I connected on LinkedIn and recommended the recruiter (a site feature is you can recommend people you work with), praising the attention to detail. <S> Now this is not the same as them earning a commission by placing you, but they may still appreciate it. <S> Also, if you find a good recruitment agent whose approach works for you, it is worth bookmarking them in some way <S> - that was a useful side effect for me, the agent is still there in my contacts list (in fact it seems they have been promoted, so I cannot of been the only one to have had a high opinion). <S> You never know when you might be on either end of the recruitment process in future.
| I would send them a polite letter (or e-mail) stating that you have accepted another job offer (don't go into more specifics than that) and appreciate their time and effort in trying procure a job for you.
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Taking a contractor job just once-off? TL;DR Is it reasonable to do contract work for a single job between full-time jobs when I don't yet know much about what contract work involves, or is it something that requires more time and investment? I'm a software developer, or at least I was until the company I worked for folded. I'm used to full-time, and I'd like to stay that way, but many of the jobs I'm finding in my area are contract (I've found one in particular that I'm really interested in, but is contract). Contract looks quite involved and I don't understand it, but I need to take something soon. I'm afraid of being too picky in my job-hunting, especially since I can always search for a full-time role later, but I'm also afraid of jumping into a form of employment I know little about (I understand many people have been hard done by through the finicky wording of contracts). Basically, I don't know enough to make that call. Is it reasonable for someone in my position to learn everything I need to know about contracting in order to get a reasonable job more easily in a short space of time? Or is that time better spent sifting through to find the full-time ones? (I'm in Australia, if that matters.) <Q> A full time job is a contract job. <S> This is much the same, but you have to be a lot more careful of what you're contracting to do and how the billing is arranged. <S> It's your responsibility to make sure you're not going to come out badly. <S> But if you keep it simple and have a thorough paper trail you'll be ok. <S> Many people actually prefer these sorts of jobs. <S> The main things to watch out for are making sure you're getting paid promptly, and not agreeing to anything too vague which might lump you with a whole bunch of issues. <S> And make sure anything outside of that scope is understood to be an extra bill. <S> If you're working to timeframes, make sure you have a solid estimation of the time needed, don't make a rough guess, there's nothing worse for your reputation than failing to meet deadlines. <A> Agree with the above answer to an extent. <S> There is always the chance that future employers will question the move but in your case it seems like a genuine reason. <S> If financially you need to be working - I would take the contract and actively search for permanent roles. <A> This is hard to answer without knowing you personally. <S> Being self-employed clearly isn't for everyone. <S> Some people really enjoy it, while others constantly get screwed and loose money on every project they touch. <S> As you constrain your question to creating proper contracts, I feel the need to point out, that even if you have a "good" contract, people may simply screw you through not paying and hoping you don't have the money and time to go to court, or they'll go bankrupt in the meantime. <S> So while having a proper contract really helps in preventing a lot of problems right from the start, it's by no way an insurance guaranteeing well-going projects. <S> Don't take to large projects to limit the risk involved in a single contract. <S> When I started contracting, I wouldn't take projects over more than 10.000€ even when there were direct inquiries. <S> This atleast somehow limits the financial risk associated with each single project. <S> Trust your gut and don't work for people who are difficult from the start. <S> Success in contracting is atleast 50% the knowledge of human nature. <S> I wouldn't advise you to work for a single employer, but to always try to work for different ones, so you won't be totally ruined if one doesn't pay their bills (and this will most likely happen some day). <S> You'll learn everything you need to know the hard way (through practical experience) anyway, but if you are following the above points you would atleast be able to limit your exposure to the risk of huge financial losses in the starting period. <S> In almost any case, people start of with no prior knowledge in contracting/accounting/etc. <S> and then figure it out by themself somehow. <S> In the end I would therefore say, your question is more a question of personal attitude. <S> Being a contractor means you'll have to care for yourself. <S> There is no employer who will care for you. <S> If you are fine with that, there is nothing stopping you from just doing it.
| If you're struggling to find a full time permanent position right now, then contract might be the only way you can survive financially. To answer your actual question, I would say it's reasonable, if you are following some simple rules. So get a very clear idea of what is needed to complete the project, make sure both parties agree to that (in writing). Avoid customers who are constantly changing their mind (such people call that "being flexible").
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how do I make it clear when applying for a job that I'm willing and able to relocate at very short notice? I've previously mentioned that I was considering looking for new jobs for x and y (not relevant to this question) reasons. I'm applying for jobs in State A since I used to live there, and I can very well move over there whenever I feel like. I'm currently located 600 miles from my old home/location. And although I'm more than willing to move and I plan to mention it in a cover letter or additional comments inside the applications, I still wonder if my current location is something that would discourage recruiters from even considering me as a potential employee. <Q> How do I make it clear when applying for a job that I'm willing and able to relocate <S> I'd argue that you don't. <S> Every word in a tightly-wrapped cover letter and resume is precious space that you could be using to impress the recruiter. <S> I'm pretty confident that if you live in <S> A and are applying for a job in B , the potential employer assumes that you realize that you're not applying for a local job. <S> It's 2016 and we're well into the Age of the Internet; employers aren't expecting that you found out about this position in your local newspaper. <S> Your willingness to relocate is <S> a given if you're applying for a job that's not local. <S> It's almost like writing on your resume, " Will work for money. " <S> Isn't that the point of applying for a job to begin with? <S> So the employer assumes that you're willing to relocate for the job that you're applying for, so that leaves us with, relocate at very short notice? <S> In my experience, interested companies will usually say in the first email or phone call something like, <S> " As you may know, this job is located in Vermont. <S> If offered a position, how soon would you be able to relocate? " <S> The first thing to note is their assumption of your willingness to relocate (which ties into the first part of this answer). <S> The second thing to pay attention to is the fact that if they're interested, they'll ask . <S> Now you have the opportunity to express how quickly you can relocate. <S> If they don't ask you here, they will ask you eventually <S> but even if you could move across the galaxy in two days, that's not going to be the deciding factor on a job offer. <S> This is why I'm suggesting that you don't waste your CV or resume space on this. <S> Good luck! <S> NOTE: <S> If you were unwilling to relocate or couldn't relocate within a reasonable amount of time, then that's probably something you'd want to mention on a CV. <S> It'll knock your odds of employment down <S> but it'll filter out the companies that are not looking to hire someone in such a position, thus saving them <S> and you time in the process. <S> There's no point in getting to the interview stage, or any stage for that matter, just to find out that the company and you are incompatible. <A> If you say you are willing to relocate for the job, where you are now is mostly not an issue except that it makes in-person interviews more of a pain for all concerned. <A> If you are talking about a few hundred miles within the same company, I can't see recruiters seeing that as not worth trying to do business with you. <S> I think that local people would have an advantage in reduced risk associated with relocation but that advantage isn't huge. <S> That said once you start scaling up to international relocation, companies would expect to pay your moving costs and this isn't cheap and there may be assumptions that visas will be required so you may be looking at a significant disadvantage as an applicant. <A> That will be a flag to recruiters that you're not fishing for a big signing bonus to get you moved.
| I suggest you clarify the language in your cover letter that you are willing to relocate to the new location at your own expense (if you haven't).
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Should I tell potential future employers I am in love? I am a computer programmer and I live in a mid-sized city. A year ago, I started making plans to find a better job and move out. About 3 months ago, just as my dream job was coming into focus, I met someone and fell in love. I'm not an impulsive person and neither are they. Had we had time to date longer, we would marry each other. I got the dream job, but now I'm re-examining job opportunities in my hometown, on the off-chance I find something good. I don't have much time. When employers ask me "why I want this job", can I tell them it's because I met someone? I want them to be sympathetic to me, but I don't want to sound impulsive, because this is not impulse, however it seems to the reader. <Q> Best case is you get a sympathetic laugh, worst case it will come across as.. weird. <S> What I would say instead is something like, "I'm excited about your company for reasons-here. <S> Also I'd like to stay in my hometown to be closer to friends and family." <S> This accomplishes your goal as well as coming across as positive, because you are also saying indirectly, "I am planning on staying in this town for a long time" which is generally seen as a positive. <A> The problem with saying "I'm in love" or "I've met someone" is the message it may inadvertently send some employers. <S> You're basically telling them that (potentially, in their opinion) it doesn't take much to get you to relocate. <S> While relationships aren't necessarily marriages these days, without marriage they are still likely to be viewed as transitory. <S> There's a significant difference in perception with "I'm moving here because I'm getting married" to " <S> I'm moving here because I've fallen in love." <S> While it may not be completely based in reality, a marriage implies permanence. <S> Love, or a relationship you can literally just walk away from does not. <S> So there are two potential negatives. <S> One is that you could be viewed as someone who will move purely for emotional reasons. <S> The second is that you'll leave for similar reasons. <S> Were I an employer <S> and I was told that a prospect was relocating because he fell in love, I'd wonder "will he leave if he's no longer in love?" <S> or "if he falls in love again, will he just drop us and go?" <S> This is yet another case where revealing too much personal information is a bad idea. <S> Just tell them "I have a lot of friends and family here and ..." then say something positive about the community and how much you love it. <A> You really don't need to explain your reasons for wanting to remain in the city that you're already in! <S> When you're applying for a job, and you get asked why you want it, then tell them why you want it . <S> Surely you can find something positive other than "it's a job, and it's in the right city". <S> You'd need to do that if you were moving to a bigger city, too, you know! <S> Since you're already in work, surely there must be something to attract you to the roles that you're applying for? <S> If not, why not just stay in your current job? <S> If you literally cannot think of a single positive thing to say, then stick to meaningless platitudes like the job offering interesting challenges and the company having a good reputation. <S> Don't tell them that the only attractive feature of the job is that it's in the right city - regardless of what the reason is for that city being the right one. <A> No , such a response oversteps professional boundaries and would be inappropriate. <S> The company wants to know why you want the job for you, and not so you can use the job to help you fulfill your personal desires <A> "I met a girl, we have been dating, and want to be by her." <S> I hire TONS of people. <S> I love honesty. <S> I love the slight hint of unprofessionalism during interviews. <S> I am hiring people, not robots. <S> Love it when someone tells me <S> they just like to make money, love it when people diss a product of ours, just like the real person to come out. <S> So either you are a normal guy who is in love and mention it for a minute <S> and then your skills <S> the next 59 minutes are you are the kooky dude in love that wants to talk about it for an hour. <S> I hire the normal guy in a heartbeat but <S> the kooky dude I just talk to for an hour. <A> The exact wording "I'm in Love" is a bit inappropriate. <S> It comes off like you have a mad crush on someone you've only briefly met. <S> Hopefully the other person in the relationship is as much in love with you. <S> ALL employers value an employee who is in a committed relationship over someone who is single, if you have the maturity to commit to a long term relationship, it says a lot about the type of person you are and about how you will get along in the workplace. <A> With a smile on your face. <S> If you want a job in your home town so you can look 24/7 after your sick mother, I feel very sorry for you, but I don't hire you. <S> If you want a job in your home town to start a happy family life, that's great. <S> Next you tell them how lucky you are that an excellent company like theirs has an open position right where you were looking for one. <A> I wouldn't say that. <S> This COULD be seen as honesty, but also (more likely) <S> you could be seen as someone who would leave your current job and city on a whim should this relationship end. <S> Just as you did when it started (in their eyes).
| You tell them that you are looking for a position in or very close to your home town for strong personal reasons. I wouldn't say "I'm in love" directly. I can say with confidence that if you let them know the reason for staying is because of a relationship, it will impress them with your honesty and give them confidence you're likely to stay.
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Downsides of Unemployment Benefits I was recently laid off from my job as a software developer at startup in California because the startup no longer had funding to pay myself and most other employees. I've managed to find and accept an offer at another company but wont be paid until the 15th of next month. I will be unable to pay my bills until then because I have no savings. I attempted to negotiate a signing bonus but was told it wouldn't kick in until 90 days after so it was irrelevant. However the recruiter told me I could file for unemployment benefits for the 5-6 weeks I was unemployed. Is that something I can do, and what are the repercussions of doing so? <Q> There are no professional repercussions of filing for unemployment because that's not something an employer would know about. <S> There is a gap in employment regardless, but nobody should ask (it might not be legal to ask) or care if you're getting government benefits during that time. <S> Also, from your description you were not "Fired". <S> You were "laid off" or "downsized". <S> "Fired" implies cause, the others do not. <S> I suggest changing the language <S> so you don't accidentally convey the wrong thing to a future employer or others. <A> Unless you are fired with cause, i.e., because of something wrong you did, you can apply and qualify for the unemployment. <S> Alas, with the sad state of CA state government workers, probably the unemployment payments will not kick in until you see your first paycheck. <S> The office which handles unemployment cases is awfully slow, then they need to conduct an interview with you and with your past employer. <S> If they don't respond, they have to wait so many days etc. <S> You see where I am going. <S> But by all means apply for it. <S> It will be a bonus when you get it. <S> Don't forget to report every week that you are looking for work and at least send resumes out and record the company names. <S> You need to send them out to the office or enter them somehow to the system using online or phone system. <S> Also, don't forget to report on the first day of your work to stop unemployment payments. <S> Not doing so, is considered fraud and you don't want to find yourself there. <S> Reach out to your landlord and other people you need to pay before your first paycheck arrives and explain them your situation and tell them that you will pay every red cent you owe them once you get paid and pay the administered late fees and interest if that is the case. <S> Most people are more understanding when you give them a heads up than not finding the payment in their mailboxes on its due date. <S> And take this as a learning opportunity to accumulate a rainy day fund to tide you over at least 2-3 months. <S> You were lucky to get a job immediately. <S> Next time you might not be that lucky. <S> Take it from someone who got laid off under the same circumstances as you, 10 days before 9/11 attacks happened. <S> 6 months of unemployment is nothing to balk at. <A> There is NO "waiting period". <S> The catch is that if you are later found to be ineligible, you will have to repay the money you received. <S> If you are found to have intentionally filed a false claim, there are penalties and possible charges. <S> I do know that you cannot file a retroactive claim. <S> As others have pointed out, the term "fired" usually means terminating for cause. <S> Becoming unemployed because your company couldn't afford to pay you is being "laid off" or "downsized". <S> Also, receiving unemployment benefits comes with requirements to actively seek employment and to accept any job offer that you get. <A> It's been over 20 years since I needed unemployment benefits. <S> When my employer let me go, I didn't file right away, as I knew I wouldn't receive benefits immediately (and had other matters to attend to). <S> As I noted in a comment above, the state I was in at the time wouldn't pay benefits until the time had elapsed for severance and vacation pay, if any. <S> In my case I received two weeks of severance pay and had about the same amount of vacation accumulated, so one month passed before I received the benefits. <S> However, it was only about two weeks from the time I filed until I was eligible to receive benefits, and the benefits started right on time. <S> That said, I've never lived in California, so I don't know how long the process takes there. <S> One other thing to keep in mind <S> : Unemployment benefits are considered taxable income; however - at least when and where I received them - no taxes were withheld from the payments I received. <S> At tax time, this can have a substantial effect if you receive unemployment for a few months.
| I'm not in California, so your mileage may vary, but here in Michigan, you can file a claim the first day you're unemployed (assuming you were not terminated for cause) and you will receive benefits on schedule.
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Should I try for a counter-counter offer? I work for Tech Firm A, and was recently contacted by Tech Firm B. Firm B has made me a fairly nice offer. I was planning to accept it, even though it means moving. My plan had been to accept and make sure everything was settled before informing my manager at Firm A. However, the recruiter made a definite point of telling me to inform her of any other offers I received, which makes me think that perhaps I should tell my current manager about Firm B, in the hopes that Firm A makes a counteroffer. Which I could then present to the recruiter for Firm B, in hopes that they'd up their original offer. I suppose my current manager could just fire me on the spot (unlikely; he's a good guy), in which case I would have to drastically advance my plans. But are there any other possible downsides to this scenario?Also, is there any sort of reasonable chance that this could lead to a higher salary offer from Firm B? Both firms are extremely large and well-known. Firm B has given me until Friday to decide, so I don't have a whole lot of time for figuring this out. <Q> I am of the opinion that playing one against the other may leave you with no job at all - or a job where they know that they have employed you because of duress. <S> I am also of the opinion that people should work not just for the money. <S> Money is a good reason for working but there should be other factors - such as enjoyment of the working environment, job satisfaction, etc. <S> If you have looked for work elsewhere, I think this is not solely due to money. <S> I think it is wise that when you have made a decision to move on then stick with it. <S> Whatever the reasons for looking for work elsewhere will raise their head again in the near future. <A> Accepting a counter offer is generally believed to be a bad idea. <S> After having found an offer from another company, you are a marked person. <S> You will be out rather sooner than later. <S> If this is the USA, there have been people accepting a counter offer and getting fired two weeks later (just because the employer was an <S> ***hole, but it happens). <S> Now asking for a counter counter offer, that is bad. <S> You got an offer, presumably because you made a good impression in an interview, you seemed capable and enthusiastic, and because you are worth what they offered you. <S> Looking for a higher offer from them destroys that good impression. <S> It's very unlikely to lead to a higher offer. <S> It could lead to #2 on their list to get an unexected offer. <A> Playing two parties against each other carries the risks others mention. <S> Whether that risk is worth taking, could depend on what the reasonably likely upside would be. <S> I would think the only way one could pull this off successfully without antagonizing your current employer, would be if they acknowledge that you are an absolute rock star that has been massively underpaid for quite some time. <S> The fact that the recruiter wants to be told of any other offers is a reflection of you having the best hand. <S> If unexpected things happen, your leverage will disappear quite quickly, thus turning the tables. <S> In addition, even though your boss is a good guy, I have more than once been surprised at how resignations have been (mis-) handled when professionals all of a sudden take things very personally. <S> Bottom line: If you are basically happy with the FirmB offer, take that and then quit. <A> So essentially, you are trying to play with fire here and "cheat" a firm into giving you a higher salary, correct? <S> NOT try to play games <S> , it WILL backfire on you and cost you dearly. <S> Your best bet is to do either of the following: Stay with Firm A and decline Firm B's offer ; though this begs the question of why you are even looking unless you just do not like Firm B's offer, though you will have wasted that Firm's time which is highly toxic (Firm B could blacklist you or let others in the industry know you wasted their company's time...networking is a double-edged sword). <S> YOU will lose from every angle. <S> Negotiating is something to do without "empty" threats. <S> If you want a higher salary (or XYZ) then negotiate for it without informing Firm A (this way if the Firm B falls through, you have Firm A to fall back on and they do not know you are looking). <S> The reason you will lose in a counter offer situation (or counter counter offer) is because once Firm A knows you are looking, your life and job are about to become 10x harder as they will dump any meaningless or grunt level task on you. <S> Firm B knows this as well (since it is common knowledge essentially), so they could retract their offer and say "We cannot compete with XYZ's offer, sorry". <S> So you lose either way. <S> The counter offer game is just a gimmick that will burn you and not either company. <S> I would accept or decline the offer and not play a game with either firm.
| Accept Firm B's offer and leave Firm A ; never play the counter offer game, I would strongly recommend you do If both parties seem quite budget-constrained and your upside is probably only within the single-digit percentages, it seems the downside risks outweigh the upside.
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Boss is expressing concern about my happiness at work I work in tech at a medium-sized company. My team is in the middle of a very frustrating project. The project has been emotionally draining and the end keeps slipping further into the future. In the past I argued that this project wasn't a good investment of our team's time, and people listened... in the short term. But then a few months later we'd been signed up for this monumental and dreadful task. My manager and I have good rapport. I have talked to him several times over the past few months about feeling frustrated at work. After a recent chat with him, his boss asked me to meet sometime soon and discuss my feelings about work and "how things are going". I haven't had too much direct interaction with him, but this exchange felt fairly personal. I suspect that he's gained the impression from my boss that I'm not happy and might consider leaving. By industry standards I'm inexperienced, but on my team I am one of the most productive developers and a mentor to those around me. I frequently feel like I'm working overtime to keep everything from going off the rails, which is part of what's led to my disillusionment. At this point in my career, I want to be in an environment full of great people who I can learn from, and instead I feel like I'm at the top, with plenty of people to teach and nobody to teach me. Based on this interaction, I sense that my 2nd-level manager is aware of my contributions and is invested in keeping me on the team. I don't mean to come at this opportunity from an "everything-is-a-negotiation-and-I'd-argue-with-my-grandmother-on-her-deathbed-for-two-more-vacation-days" sort of mentality, but I do have an admittedly selfish interest in improving my happiness at work. A raise would of course not be unwelcome although I'm already compensated fairly (though not quite as generously as if I worked at a larger company). Am I being unrealistic to hope that a conversation with this 2nd-level manager might result in substantial changes that would make me happier at work? Like, say, hiring a much more senior developer onto the team, or changing the way projects are prioritized to avoid this sort of drudgery again? Or, more cynically, should I use this as a lever to boost my salary before spring-boarding to another company? <Q> This is something you need to make a decision about, we can't make it for you. <S> I'm going to point out some options from how I see your problem, I may well be wide of the mark. <S> If you're at the stage where you are seriously considering leaving then <S> that is probably the best move for you. <S> Expect to upset your bosses if you do so, because you'll be leaving them a mess. <S> But always put your own needs first, especially if it affects your health. <S> If it's the just the project that is getting you down, then perhaps that could be rectified by an attitude adjustment. <S> Frustration is a bad enemy to have around, it's something a lot of people deal with, some better than others, here's my strategy which has worked for me over the years, your mileage may vary. <S> Being the go to guy is a lot of pressure, but you set the tone for a whole team. <S> I'm the go to guy for a lot of people, I am successful because when things go South I'm walking around like a carefree butterfly wearing a big grin. <S> The bigger the problem, the wider the grin. <S> That's how you boost morale and get a team pulling together and solving problems. <S> However some projects are just ridiculous and should be chucked in the bin where they belong, so that's a judgement call. <S> Personally I have taken projects to fruition and got enormous satisfaction from doing what was breaking other people in the attempt. <S> Getting the team behind me 100% was a large part of the success. <S> This is a bit like a make or break moment in some ways. <S> Expecting the bosses to solve your problems puts pressure on them, which may pay off short term for you, or may work against you. <S> If you're determined to chuck it in, then get what short term benefits you can, mentally you already have one foot out the door. <S> You can start thinking long term in your next job. <A> I do have an admittedly selfish interest in improving my happiness at work. <S> This isn't a selfish thing. <S> Full-timers spend an extraordinary chunk of their time working. <S> They see their co-workers almost as much as they see their families and more than they see their friends. <S> No position will be perfect, but there's no sense remaining in a position where you are frustrated, defeated, and miserable due to factors outside of your control - especially if you're in-demand and have other opportunities. <S> It's too much wasted energy, to much of a drain on your life. <S> Having said that, talk to the 2nd level manager. <S> I won't venture to guess what to expect from that discussion; we are undoubtedly missing a great deal of context in your situation, it's the nature of the Workplace beast. <S> Maybe it will go your way, maybe not. <S> Regardless, it will help you decided your next steps if you want to stick it out or start looking around for other work. <A> I believe you should tell them exactly what you told us and add that you fell you should be used better by the company, given some technical lead position or sub-management position so you can slowly step away from development and progressively boost your manager/team leader skills (by of course studying and learning a lot) <S> so you can stick to the company AND progress on your career. <S> A salary boost is always good, but you will be in the same unhappy position in a few months. <S> Progressing on your career, on the other end, gives you a totally different set of targets to achieve and personal challenges.
| To me the basic problem is that you're in a role you don't feel suitable for, or perhaps ready for. The physical act of smiling at problems makes the burden lighter and lessens frustration. Long term though, if you decide to stay with the company, taking the pressure in your stride will give you a huge rep boost.
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Asking prospective employer about side job after an offer? I have a side job that takes about 1-2 hours a week, and I enjoy it. I've been offered a full-time position at a company and would like to keep my side job (which does not compete even remotely in the same arena). Do I ask if this is OK during negotiations? Or should I not tell them, and ask to see their NDA (if they have one)? My ability to keep my side job would affect my decision to accept the current position. <Q> I am a professional salary negotiator. <S> I have negotiated hundreds of salaries at hundreds of different companies. <S> Your goal is to get this new job and also keep your side job. <S> Therefore you should take the course of action most likely to lead to this outcome. <S> Go through the entire process of negotiating your salary without bringing up your side job. <S> Get them to agree to the salary and other terms that you want. <S> Only after you have reached agreement on everything else (and right before you sign the employment contract), that's when you tell them that after reading the employment contract you are concerned that you might be precluded from this side hobby <S> (don't call it a job) that is entirely unrelated to your work but very important to you. <S> At this point, there is a good chance that they will be so far down the road with you that they will let you keep up your hobby. <S> To do so would be to weaken your leverage unnecessarily. <S> Also do not ask to see their NDA. <S> If they have one, they will give it to you at some point for your signature. <S> That will be another opportunity where you can then bring up your side hobby as if it were something that just occurred to you after you read the NDA. <S> I have actually negotiated a deal like this before for one of my clients and he followed exactly the steps I just listed above. <S> The employer let him keep the side hobby. <A> I will make this real simple - 99% of companies don't care about your 1-2 hour a week side gig. <S> Sign your contract and after a week or two just casually bring it up to your boss. <S> If your boss gets upset (highly unlikely) you will end your side gig. <S> If your boss doesn't care (highly likely) he will OK it or tell you to inform HR to get the final OK. <S> Let's not over complicate this, obviously if they care you want your real job not the side gig. <A> Do I ask if this is OK during negotiations? <S> Or should I not tell them, and ask to see their NDA (if they have one)? <S> Since your side business doesn't relate to the job at all there's no need to bring it up earlier. <S> Since it's unrelated <S> it's also incredibly unlikely that they'll consider it a problem. <S> If that was not the case and you have reason to believe that an employer could object to your commercial activities you can consider bringing it up sooner to avoid wasting time, but don't do it in the first interview(s). <S> Any side business that's likely to be a problem probably also merits inclusion in your resume or LinkedIn so most hiring managers would already be aware of it. <S> As part of that conversation you can ask if there's something in the employee handbook or company policy that strictly forbids having a side business. <S> If there is, it's worth getting their approval of your particular business in writing (i.e. email) just in case. <S> It's always a good idea to ask for a copy of the employee handbook or whatever policy documentation they have during the negotiation step <S> and it's not an unreasonable question, particularly in IT. <S> But in general there's no reason to not just ask the question you want to ask instead of trying to answer it yourself. <A> Based on your comment, I wouldn't bother to mention this to the potential employer. <S> Should you decide to drink only orange juice for 16 hours straight in between your shifts. <S> Stay still and watch a dot on the wall, or do <S> some side projects isn't your employer's business.
| Under no circumstances should you mention your hobby until you have a final employment contract in your hands. Yes, ask about this during the negotiation step after you've received an offer. What you do in your own time, outside of your company industry is entirely up to you.
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How bad can be a bad review among a lot of good ones As part of a recruitment process, the recruiter asked me for references after the interview. However, I only have one previous work experience, which is also my current job (first one since I left school). I don't want to publicly advertise that I'm considering leaving this job for another, so asking colleagues for references is a tricky situation, which the recruiter understood perfectly. As I didn't want to end this here, I remembered that there are reviews of my work on some freelancing site, as I did a bit of freelancing during my studies. Thing is, out of 50 reviews from projects owners, 48 are very good, 1 is bad, 1 is very bad. These are reviews ffrom more than 2 years ago and I was only a student doing underpaid projects to be able to go out from time to time. Should I forward my profile on this site to the recruiter or not ? Note that I don't think there is any easy way to find this profile without knowing the username, as I only use this username on that website. Concerning the offer, it's a software development position with a required 3 to 5 years of experience, so not fresh out of school, but still a junior position. The company itself is quite small, approximately 50 people, and the recruitment is handled by a recruitment firm. The first interview went well and my resume is going to be transmitted to the potential future employer. <Q> Two solutions here : <S> You don't speak about those reviews <S> You will not have any references for the new job, which may be bad for your profil and end up with you not getting the job you wanted. <S> But in entry level job, references are considered a bonus, but the importance depends of the company. <S> You speak about those reviews Overall <S> , you did a good job and have a lot of good reviews. <S> But a recruiter will always ask about bad ones. <S> If you are prepared to answer any question about those bad reviews, and you have a proper analysis of the failure <S> (don't say it's the client fault, think about your implication on the project, and how could you have improved it), they will be no problem, and it will be a great asset, showing that you are professional and not just the average new employee. <S> EDIT : I see you are french. <S> Lucky you, I am too. <S> In France, references are considered as an asset for a job, and what I said is applicable. <S> But it is not as important as it used to be(except for a academical jobs), so if you don't want to show those reviews, because you don't know how to handle those bad reviews, don't do it, the impact will not be that bad. <S> Maybe you could ask the recruiter if this is a big deal not to have references ? <A> Consider this: You're browsing the app store, and see an intriguing game with 4.8/5 Stars. <S> Would you dismiss the app just because there are a couple of unhappy users, or would you give it a shot, because there are so many happy users ? <S> Same goes for your potential employer. <A> Since it is not feasible to use references from your current job site you should search for other character reviews. <S> For example get a review from past professor or advisor at the school where you got your training. <S> I would avoid bringing the freelance reviews up as references. <S> There are numerous problems with this. <S> First off you cannot filter and select like you would with the types of individual reviews that I suggested above. <S> Secondly there are always questions raised about freelancing when you seek full time employment in a new position. <S> Virtually all hiring situations are looking for someone 100% and more committed to the job and employer. <S> Past freelancing could very well lead to questions as to if you would maybe be doing that again while working at the new job. <S> This is such a big deal with many employers that you are often asked to sign and agree to a 100% commitment contract with the new employer. <A> Use all of the reviews. <S> Own up to the bad ones. <S> Not only do you have a really good review record <S> but if you actually talk about the 2 bad ones out of 50 and say why they were bad, that is a great sign of maturity and accountability. <S> If I were hiring and someone showed me that track record and spoke to the bad reviews first - I would be highly impressed.
| Consider getting a review from some an employer that had given you a part time job whilst you were in school.
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How to deal with variable pay as a developer? I am going to sign a new contract in a start-up. As we discussed the pay, they warned me a part of the pay was variable. They intend to pay it all the time and partly or totally remove it in case of professional fault, to paraphrase their wording. They implemented this after bad experience with previous programmer who came only when he wanted to and they had no possiblity to fire, and made it very clear they did not intend to use it as "motivation" or objective-based tool. This seemed very odd to me. I am not a lawyer, but I tried to search if what they were planning to do could make it into the contract, but I found no similar case. From what I understood though, it seems that in my country (France), variable pay can only be made by objectives contract and can be claimed fully by the employee if the employer failed to provide an objective proof they were not fulfilled (this is mostly used for commercial commissions). I want to make things as clear as possible and even warned them about the consequence of lack of objectives, but they simply assured me they would make it clear in the contract. They sounded like they didn't want to bother right now. Should I pressure for more details now, while i'm quitting my job, or when the moment comes to sign my new contract ? EDIT: What happened next I see this topic is getting more answers so I'm giving a bit of feedback of how I am coping with the situation. I asked them for more precision by e-mail before I sign the promise, knowing that whatever they answered had legal value and had high chances to be what would be in the contract. They wrote me back the objectives would be both qualitative (respect of processes, implication, motivation) and objective-based (features etc.), so their answer was different than what they originally stated. That does mean they have a lever of pressure there, however, being confident of my own performance, not being in need of any penny of the variable amount which is pure bonus compared to what I currently earn, and considering I also have advantages regarding work time, place, and job interest, I am fine with these conditions. I can see most of you consider having a variable pay as a symbol of distrust or poor management ability or both because you consider this 10% as a potential malus (and I think it's a mistake by them to have it presented to me this way the first time), while truely it is potential bonus, that they are, according to them, giving away for doing average. Devs might not be sellers, but bounties can be motivating to anyone, and I can understand a manager wants to keep his devs motivated. Giving money reward has nothing inhuman :). In itself, the money isn't a problem, if I never gain it it's still "OK" the problem would be the lie, not the money. This is my POV and I'm 99% sure there will be a huge flow of disagreement, but my answer is this: is it better I make my own experience if this model fits me, or that I trust people that don't know me saying it wouldn't ? Note that I made my own judgement on the employer, he look friendly/honest/fine. This was a two sides interview, I am not jumping on the first opportunity blindly. <Q> Any innovations or complications in how you get paid is a red flag. <S> I would get clarification first, or more probably look elsewhere for a job. <S> It's putting you in the same category as a fruit picker who gets paid by how many baskets of apples he fills (even when it rains). <S> It's all about incentive, and it leaves all the power in the hands of the employer. <S> So be very careful. <S> In terms of being a developer under this scheme, it really looks to me like they want the convenience of having a consultant, without the consultants pay and control. <A> French guy here. <S> A few years ago, I've been in the exact same situation you describe, and I made the mistake of signing. <S> The problem you'll find if you sign is not necessarily that you won't get part of your pay sooner or later. <S> That contingency would at least prove manageable in some way. <S> No, the real problem here is that by offering this proposal to you, they do nothing but prove a serious and irretrievable lack of culture about what is a software developer and how he works. <S> They pretend to be a startup, but they do apply fundamentally "agency-like" reasonings. <S> They even confessed not being capable of managing and motivating developers (the last one, in their terms, came to "do what he wanted and show only when he pleased"). <S> Knowing nothing about software development, they want to have a trigger to better control you and better pressure you, if only unconsciously, so that you'll be tempted to shut your mouth if problems arise. <S> And if you don't, they'll cut your pay, knowing that it would be an enormous pain in the ass for you to go legal about it (long procedures, nothing to be gained in the end...). <S> Been there, done that. <S> Run from this toxic environment , and find a true "startup". <S> -- <S> Responding to your update <S> Your update makes me think that they felt your hesitation and changed their discourse. <S> Remember <S> their initial idea was of a punishment in case of professional fault. <S> This is what they're really thinking about, even if they changed the wording afterwards. <S> Otherwise, why would they have even mention this possibility in the first place? <S> Additionally, their criterias (" respect of rules, implication, motivation ") are all subjective: <S> Who judges implication and motivation? <S> What are the "rules"? <S> Those criterias have no solid foundation at all, and are in no way related to the quality of the work you'll provide. <S> Lastly, you say: I made my own judgement on the employer <S> , he look friendly/honest/fine <S> Remember that as a recruiter/boss/manager, it's his job to look friendly/honest/fine in order to keep people coming to work at his place. <S> In no case it means that he really is. <S> Makes me think of people who buy something because "the salesman was nice and appeared honest". <S> Yeah, it's just his full-time job to appear nice and honest. <A> I'm not a lawyer and this is not legal advice. <S> Paying salaries is a cost of doing business. <S> The business can sue the employee or report the employee to the police if they so desire <S> but they're (usually) obligated to pay the full salary. <S> Based on the actions of an employee, a court may decide that some of it must be paid back but that needs a court decision. <S> I'd certainly not sign a contract like this (unless being really pressed for work <S> but then I'd start looking again right away). <S> This sort of wording looks like a setup to cut salaries based on arbitrary rules. <S> Whatever they promise is not written down, only their ability to not to pay you. <A> Should I pressure for more details now, while i'm quitting my job, or when the moment comes to sign my new contract ? <S> Your strongest bargaining position is now , before deciding to leave. <S> They sounded like they didn't want to bother right now. <S> This does not seem like an employer who is going to carefully follow a procedure to determine if you are at fault; it's an option for dealing with cash shortages or securing political leverage, neither of which work in your favour. <S> Assume <S> the actual salary is the amount advertised minus the 'performance penalty' . <S> Does it still look like a good deal? <S> Before you decide, consider also how they've handled problems in the past: They implemented this after bad experience with previous programmer who came only when he wanted to <S> and they had no possiblity to fire <S> Their approach is to ignore problems, not solve them . <S> They say they had a bad developer who took frequently took unauthorised leave. <S> They didn't do anything about it. <S> They will probably be recruiting other bad developers, and bad managers who avoid managing, and failing to either turn them into good developers/managers or to fire them. <S> Their 'solution' is to threaten you and other hires with financial penalties. <S> That won't make incompetent colleagues capable, but it might make people do stupid things to avoid penalties (like coming in when sick). <S> So not only will you be stuck dealing with incompetent colleagues, your superiors might not be able to tell the difference between the good and the bad, and you might get penalised as well when things go bad. <S> Or the dead weight of the bad staff and the culture of 'nobody else does a good job, why should I?' <S> might destroy the business. <S> Anybody who's any good is going to find it hard to change this culture because anyone who speaks up might be arbitrarily penalised. <S> Is this somewhere <S> you want to work? <S> On the other hand, if you are looking to leave your current job because you're a poor performer and your managers are starting to realise it, this might be worth the gamble.
| When an employee doesn't perform up to the expected levels, the business can let that person go but in most Western countries, it's not legal to not to pay the salary.
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How can I appear more professional/serious at meetings? I do some sales meetings with usually IT people and facility directors in local schools, etc. I usually go with just my boss, who is a older man. The people we meet with tend to address him, though I will chime in and take over at any opportunity I have - I have been on quite a few of these meetings and am as assertive as I can politely be. My boss tends to get off topic and be repetitive and forget to mention some of our key sales points, and sometimes the conversation may wander without me being able to get these points in. The problem may be any combination of my boss taking over my opportunities, or those that we meet with addressing him instead of me. As a young woman, how can I appear more professional and assertive during a meeting? <Q> I think you have two issues here. <S> First, your boss isn't letting you do your job. <S> Second, the folks you're pitching to may not recognize your skills / qualifications / authority / whatever. <S> I think the first feeds the second, and so it should be addressed first. <S> Take the above question to your boss. <S> If he's a good, experienced mentor, he should understand and help. <S> You could spin it slightly and say something like, 'Hey, I'd really like to get as good as you at these sales meetings; what if I lead the pitch and you provide feedback after on how I can do better?' <S> This will feed his ego, stroke his grey beard, and generally encourage him to want to help you. <S> He may not even realize he's dominating. <S> The second one is easier if the first one goes down. <S> I'm not making assumptions there, but as a tech person I can tell you "my people" will often dismiss anyone who doesn't immediately show Alpha Nerd in the room, and unfortunately there's often some gender bias there as well. <A> While I completely agree with @Paul's answer, you may also require a little adjustment in how you interact in these meetings. <S> As a small, quietly spoken woman in the technical side of IT where most of the time I'm the only woman in the room, I have learned that sometimes it's necessary to be slightly more assertive than is polite. <S> One trick I use is rather than waiting for the speaker to leave a pause, nod and start speaking just as they finish and keep saying what you intended to say. <S> If you pause that point, it can give a cue that you weren't comfortable with what you were going to say, and the more assertive participants will again take control of the discussion. <S> So simply put, you sometimes need to make a gap, rather than wait for it! <S> You may find your boss is actually doing this if you listen closely :) <A> I had similar issues when I first became a sales engineer (also working with schools). <S> I was the baby-faced early 20s techy kid with the balding, assertive, sales guy. <S> You're already doing a lot of the right things. <S> But the best thing to do is have a conversation after each meeting. <S> How did it go? <S> What worked? <S> What didn't work? <S> What do we want to work on next time? <S> Those "off-topic, repetitive wanderings" may be completely intentional. <S> Those sales points may have been intentionally skipped because he assessed the room and felt they were unnecessary. <S> (When you've won the deal, stop selling) <S> I would oftentimes question the sales rep's direction during the meeting, and he would have a variety of rationale for it that I'd never thought of. <S> That sparked opportunities for learning on my part. <S> If nothing else, it helped us understand each other. <S> I could start to predict where he was going to take a meeting based on those conversations, and he could see where I was trying to redirect a conversation to when I would step in. <S> You should be a team, and communication is key to a successful team.
| If you're leading the pitch and providing the information and so on, it's easier to show your stuff. Often, I might have counterpoints or thoughts of missed opportunities/strategies that we could incorporate into future meetings. It also helps if you're talking the clients' language.
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I'm quite unprofessional outside job environment. Can it be an issue? My work life and my personal life has huge differences. People I know here seem to be much more calm and both in personality and in their hobbies. Don't get me wrong: I can talk about non-work related things with them - like soccer and such. The thing is that I'm not really interested in it, and my main hobbies (game development, anime, etc) are less of interesting topics for them. I also love to be less serious, especially on social media, which may make even my Facebook profile look funny - or even ridiculous? I don't know, but definitely this is the way I love to be, and I'm not sure if colleagues would appreciate it. My question is that if I and my collegaues get to know each other better, then is it possible that they noticing my rather strange behaviour causes issues and flaws? I think of their opinion on me - which I shouldn't care about, and usually I don't, but in a workplace, it seems to be more important, especially relationship with my boss, for instance. <Q> No matter how you try and distance your private life from your professional life, these days everything is connected so you must assume that anything you post on a personal page such as Facebook <S> may be seen at work. <S> Especially if you have colleagues as friends. <S> So then you need to look at what is expected of you professionally at work. <S> Here's a brief example, for discussion purposes only: <S> Would a colleague have a problem with knowing you support a football team that has just beaten their team? <S> Maybe, maybe not. <S> Would they have a problem knowing you gloat about it on Facebook for a week - that might annoy someone, but probably not more than that. <S> Would they have a problem if you had pictures from the middle of a fight with opposing supporters? <S> That would almost certainly be an issue. <S> So...yes, it can be an issue. <S> But it all depends on what you do outside of work. <S> Will you change your behaviour to do less unprofessional things? <S> Will you just not post them online? <S> Will you change jobs? <S> If you have some behaviours that you think will be a challenge you may be able to speak about them with your boss. <S> I had a role some years back with an organisation that would be seen as very professional in business dealings, so before I took the job I pointed out that I also played lead guitar in a heavy rock band - <S> so they could work out whether that would cause them any embarrassment with their clients. <S> It was fine, and some clients loved it, but getting clarity early on helped position it. <S> At the end of the day, it is your personal life, but perceptions are very strong things, so if you are concerned, do something now. <S> Sure, anything online already will always be there, but you can show how you have not been unprofessional during your tenure there. <A> A good idea is to have a separate "work" profile and your normal profile. <S> You friend people at work on your work profile and make sure you keep your normal profile private to just friends that you know/trust. <S> However, based on what you said it doesn't sound like a issue. <S> Gaming and cartoons are fairly common hobbies with a computer-savvy person. <S> Though it's unclear what is offensive these days. <S> You know your environment better than others. <S> Edit: Anyone using social network should know that what they post/share can have negative consequences. <S> As such it is always wise to consider who and what you are sharing. <S> Exercise common sense. <S> Ex: You wouldn't share a hot new anime movie about zombie slaying with the CEO of the company who you never met. <S> Not only that you wouldn't want to "like" a political movement that may be in disagreement with people at work. <S> With a separate profile, you can control what you share while keeping your opinions. <A> Ben Franklin once wrote "Do not do what you would not have known". <S> In this day and age with social media and the most innocuous posts going viral for little or no reason, you need to be careful. <S> For that reason, I never insult people on SM or post anything risqué. <S> You must assume that the worst thing you do or post online will be seen by people who would use it against you. <S> That said, we are all flawed, and while your likes and dislikes may differ, most people don't really care. <S> You are never going to be a topic of conversation at anyone's dinner table unless you do something very outlandish. <A> You've kind of got two questions you want answers for here: <S> Is it okay for me to have a goofy social media presence? <S> With the exclusion of professional sites like Linkedin, I would say yes, it's fine to be goofy on social media. <S> You're not doing anything illegal or against company policy, so why would they care? <S> Will people look down on me for talking about geeky hobbies? <S> You're not the only person in the world (or, most likely, in your company) that likes anime and video games. <S> ("Oh man, I was playing Dark Souls last night and was close to beating one of the bosses- <S> and then I fell off a cliff! <S> " is a lot better than "How 'bout them video games?") <S> If you really just want to shoot the breeze about the newest releases, though, you'll have to search for people whose interests are more similar to yours.
| But even if you can't find someone with the exact same interests as you, I've found that most friends will show polite interest in anything as long as you can make it interesting to them. You need to assess whether or not you are too unprofessional - and if so what you will do about it. It's best to go with your guts on this and simply not share what you think may be viewed negatively.
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What do I write a goodbye email to a team, when the team is the reason the I'm leaving my job? I've been in my position for only 5 months (4 total years at the company), and I have found new employment. My last day is in a week, and I'm drafting a goodbye email to my team to let them know. (I gave notice to my manager a while ago.) To be professional, I've written the following: While I've only been with the team for a few months, it has been a very valuable experience for me. Thank you all for ________ But one of the reasons why I'm leaving is because it became very clear that I am a bad cultural and skill fit for this team. So it seems disingenuous to thank them for anything. I could be honest and say something like "thank you for showing me what I do and don't want for my career" or something, but anything that's honest and fits in that blank seems unprofessional or petty. (I really do appreciate my time with this group, it has taught me a lot about how I best operate.) How can I word this goodbye email to be professional, polite, and without being dishonest? <Q> Refocus your email on the 4 years you spent at the company, not the 5 months you've spent with this team. <S> Instead of thanking your team (which here is insincere), you can sincerely thank the company for the valuable experience you've had for the last four years. <S> If applicable, it may also be nice to praise a current project or business directive that you feel will bring future success for the company, and by extension, the team. <A> "I would like to say what a pleasure it has been working with you all. <S> I have learned many valuable lessons here which I will find useful throughout my career. <S> You have all taught me the importance of teamwork, and helped me to identify my future goals for my career. <S> I will never forget working with all of you". <S> This way you can have your cake and eat it too. <S> It's one long double entendre that will be professional, but a private joke to you... <S> What you'd really be saying.... <S> "I would like to say what a pleasure it has been working with you all. <S> (I would like to, but that would be a lie) <S> I have learned many valuable lessons here which I will find useful throughout my career.(As <S> nothing serves so well as a bad example) <S> You have all taught me the importance of teamwork,(as you fail at it miserably) and helped me to identify my future goals for my career.(Such as to run like hell if I ever see a group like you again) <S> I will never forget working with all of you". <S> (no matter how hard I try) <S> I know, it's snarky and petty, but you wouldn't REALLY be saying the parts in parenthesis. <S> It's a professional way to bow out of a bad situation without ruining your career. <S> You can THINK the things in the parenthesis, but never say them. <S> In your mind, you'd be telling them off. <S> In their minds, they'd have received a compliment. <S> Everyone is happy. <A> There is no requirement for an email to the team. <S> Nor is there a requirement to send an email to the entire company. <S> If you have a handful of people that you want to keep in touch with, then send those individuals an email from your personal account so they will have your personal account. <S> If your management has left it up to you to tell the team, don't worry about it too much. <S> The team members that like you, will stop by and talk to you. <S> Those that are happy you are leaving will either not talk to you, or will only say the minimum. <A> What you have written on your own correspondsto reality: While I've only been with the team for a few months, it has been a very valuable experience for me. <S> Thank you all for ________ <S> "it became very clear that..." means you experienced something, in this case you were a bad fit, and you have actually learned from it. <S> You "experimented" and collected data, and this increased your knowledge. <S> Therefore there is value. <S> And you're thanking them for this. <S> Just these two concise lines, and you are professional, polite and for sure honest.
| Pick a person you feel close to, maybe one of those millennials that feel the same way you do, once you tell them it will spread to the rest of the team.
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How should I change my plan in order to find an entry job, after graduating already? Here's my background: 1) Went to community college for 2 years. Graduated with a high GPA. 2) Transferred to university and earned my BSc in Computer Science. 3) During my 2 years at university, I did unpaid work for a business and had an unpaid internship that the university made me take. 4) I took 18 credits/semester of all math and science courses for 2 years. I ended up with a low GPA due to health issues. 5) After graduation, I did more unpaid work for a business. I also did volunteer work. It's been 13 months since graduation, and I haven't found a job. I'm local to NYC. I've had my resume checked a million times. My university's career center doesn't want to help me find something, and neither do my professors. I get denied from all new grad programs due to my low GPA. I do get interviews, but none of them have been technical. They have been with dinky companies. I did get two offers: 15/hr (that's much less than any internship at any company around here) at an expensive area and an unpaid internship at a newborn NYC startup. I have tried meetups and networking. For example, there were 5 meetups + 1 workshop (I paid lots of money) this month. Sometimes companies recruit from there, but they always want people with lots of experience. A fairly known company was recruiting at a tech convention I went to. After much networking, I earned a chance to interview with them. I did two phone interviews, then I was promptly rejected due to "lack of skills and experience." So, what in the world am I supposed to be doing now? I never get any tech interviews. I have a 50/50 chance of passing phone screens. For the few on-sites I've had, it was framework or language trivia. I can't continue being unemployed for so long. If you're wondering what my skills are: Java, C# and ASP.NET, various web technologies, Ruby and F# (recently started really focusing on it). <Q> You're in a bad situation, jobs are not as easy to come by as people make out sometimes. <S> My suggestion is take any work that keeps you in funds regardless of industry, I've done cleaning, bouncing, painting, labouring and a bunch of others. <S> This will keep you in food and rent until such time as you can land a job in the industry you want. <S> Never give up and never lose faith in yourself. <S> Eventually a position will show up and you'll have your opportunity to make a good impression and kickstart your career. <S> When I was a forestry worker, one of the other planters had a uni degree in maths. <S> I've met farm workers and furniture movers with degrees (the furniture mover actually had two degrees, one science and one business). <S> My own uni studies have nothing to do with the industry I'm in. <A> I worked as a security guard for two years. <S> then moved into customer service for an "entertainment center" a.k.a a cashier And did not finish my computer science degree due to financial issues. <S> But, while I was in these jobs I always had my main goal at the back of my mind <S> , I setup a site dedicated to developing websites for local businesses(free of charge) in order to increase sales, this built a portfolio of my skills and what I have done, while doing this I managed to land a part-time support engineer job where if I was available and they needed help <S> I would work on-site alongside other technicians and from there I landed a full time job as a Junior Sys Admin. <S> What i'm getting at is, take the little jobs, <S> once you know where you want to end up you can always focus on that as well, experience is such a huge requirement when looking for jobs and if you even have 3 months more than someone else <S> it's a huge plus, and you will learn new skills along the way which is only beneficial. <S> There's no better way to improve your skills than working alongside like minded people in a team, you might not love what you're doing <S> but once it pays the bills and adds to your resume, that's all that matters. <S> Don't give up, apply apply apply, eventually you will get where you want to be. <A> I've done road construction and worked for a convenience store and in retail. <S> Get SOMETHING, and next time don't pooh pooh the dollar amount or dismiss small companies. <S> You don't get much money in the smaller ones, but if you can eat, it's enough. <S> What you DO get in those companies is the opportunity to learn and get experience in your field. <S> At this point, if I were you, I'd take McAnything, and do some volunteer work part-time to keep your skills fresh. <S> Maybe even pick up a few more skills while you're at it, because your skillset is pretty standard for a recent grad and isn't going to impress anyone beyone the $15/hr you've been offered. <S> What you're doing isn't working, you need to swallow your pride a bit, understand that you're not going to be making six figures any time soon, and hit the bricks, as they say. <A> It seems as though one of the main reasons that you can't land a job or move past the phone / technical questions is that you are simply not skilled enough for the roles. <S> My suggestion would be to subscribe to various learning platforms, such as lynda.com or similar, and really spend as much time as you can filling in all the knowledge gaps. <S> (this is what I did when I graduated and went over a year without a job in my field) <S> In the beginning it is all about getting your foot in some doors. <S> Spend about a year at each place, and then use that as a stepping stone up to something better!
| Start at the small, crappy tech jobs, and work your way up.
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It is rude to ask for a reply only via email when applying to a job? I'm job going to send out some resumes to apply for several software developer position. In my resume there is my mobile phone but I'd rather be reached via email, should I tell them explicitely or just remove my mobile phone from my resume? I am asking this because a month ago I received an email from a recruiter that worked in a company that was interested on my Linkedin profile and asked for a resume via mail. I sent it to them, after a couple weeks they tried to reach me via phone (I discovered it only few days later by looking up the number on the Internet), but I couldn't answer at the time because they called in working hours (11am) while I was working at my current job. They never called back so I feel like I missed an opportunity. <Q> It's perfectly acceptable to stipulate the way you want to be contacted. <S> Personally I don't give out my phone number <S> , I want everything in written form because I can answer at my leisure and have a record. <A> You should include on your resume only the contact methods you want people to use. <S> 1 <S> I see plenty of resumes that have only an email address. <S> A recruiter who wants to talk to you will send email asking for a call -- they do it when making unsolicited contacts, after all (so says my inbox). <S> That's for initial contact. <S> Email is asynchronous while a phone call is synchronous, so if the other party wants a synchronous conversation, you're going to need to have a call. <S> But with this approach of only listing the email address, you can at least schedule <S> the call, which you will probably find more convenient. <S> It beats getting calls while you're at work in an open-office plan. <S> 1 <S> This is a specialization of a general principle: only include on your resume information that you want to be available as part of the application process. <S> Anything you offer is fair game for recruiters or interviewers to use. <A> It would be more professional and also increase your chances for job. <S> As an employer I would be fine with email for initial communication, but for subsequent discussions, I would prefer phone for being more efficient and time saving, as I can get away with multiple to and from iteration. <S> Email will anyway be used for communicating any official information, documents or anything that should be there in records.
| I think you should provide, both email and phone in your resume, and state the preferred mode of communication as email and availability hours for telephonic communication.
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Feel like my area is understaffed. What to say to management? My company asks me to do a wide variety of things, across multiple applications and multiple skill sets. For example, they will ask me to do customer support, technical support, design and art assets, business analysis, and programming between three separate applications in three different languages and full stack. I often have to switch between multiple of these and multi-task. A jack of all trades, really. I feel like there is simply no way for me to efficiently concentrate on something. I will have three different responsibilities all listed as "urgent" in completely separate fields that can't be managed concurrently. On top of that, I've heard management say they would like it if I would be more involved in the business side and product management. I really just want to stick to the part I am good at and what I was hired for: programming. How can I convince management that they are understaffed and should hire someone for the business analysis, technical support, and design separately? <Q> The only way you will get help is if you don't get things done. <S> There is no reason to hire another person if everything is currently getting done. <S> 90% of companies will burn you out before they add on more salary. <S> So either you are doing too many things and just don't like that - and that is either having conversation with boss or looking for another job. <S> Or you just have too much to do and are hurrying through everything. <S> The fact that you are good at a lot of things - compared to their other staff - I probably would not have that conversation with your manager. <S> As some non-tech managers freak out and think a techie is becoming hostile when topics like this are brought up. <S> The manager is like well I have to have meetings for 4 different projects <S> it is the same thing. <S> So it really comes down to the hours you are working. <S> If it is 40 or within range for your job - you shut up and do job or find another. <S> If it is a lot more you let your manager know you are getting burned out and have been working too much (not on too many different things). <S> Then simply don't do things that are down on the list. <S> There will be some hostile attitudes to push you to do these things, push these attitudes to your manager and make him have those conversations. <S> I have been in your situation a number of times. <S> Either management trusts you and wants more output so gives you help or they don't have any idea what they have or want and burn you out. <S> The bad manager will go behind your back and sign a vendor contract to take duties away from you.. and within three months you are doing more work to fix vendor issues than if you did it yourself from start. <A> Run a thorough code analysis on the code base. <S> I'm willing to bet it has a lack luster maintainability index. <S> What they don't see is that you will not be able to continue this forever, because you're forced to cut corners in order to keep up with the workload. <S> Show them this analysis and how the technical debt is going to eventually eat them alive. <S> If it helps, point out that 80% of the cost of software is on maintenance , not original cost of development. <S> Once you've done this, the company has 3 choices. <S> Ignore the writing on the wall. <S> (In which case you start looking for employment somewhere else immediately and without hesitation.) <S> Replace any custom built solutions with out of the box software that entire companies have spent collective lifetimes perfecting. <S> They've done it better than you ever could, not because you're a bad programmer, but because they specialize in it . <S> Put the hard numbers in front of their faces. <S> If they ignore it, that's their problem, not yours. <S> It's unfortunate, but many companies don't have a clue that they're in the software business. <S> (And every company is in the software business these days.) <A> Firstly take a look at your workload. <S> Do they actually have enough current and ongoing programming work to keep you occupied full time, or even close to it? <S> If the answer to that is 'Yes' then:- <S> Take your concerns up with management, and keep doing so. <S> Eventually one of two things will happen. <S> They hire someone else to help you. <S> They hire someone else to learn your job and replace you. <S> If they don't <S> and you just want to do programming, you're probably in the wrong job.
| Ask your manager to prioritize. Bring in the help you need in order to properly support the software.
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Resign because company joint venture with other company? Is it a common thing that a company joint venture with other company in certain division will result some of employees under that division to resign? <Q> Most joint ventures I have seen actually employ more staff at both ends because it's extra work. <S> I have seen people quit, but not many. <S> It would depend on the exact circumstances, but that's what I have seen. <S> If a company is relying on a joint venture at the expense of what it already has, then it might be a good idea to get out. <A> Depends. <S> Normally people would stay on board if the company switched. <S> In typical take overs they will keep everything as is. <S> Some restructuring may be done. <S> It depends on who <S> you're seeing leave. <S> For example, if a mass of workers are leaving it could be a sign of lay off or restructuring by lower/upper management. <S> If you're seeing a mass of upper/lower managers leaving, it could be a sign of a pending lay off of workers (basically they're jumping ship knowing something but just not telling the workers). <S> It's rare someone would leave just because they disagree with the company's business direction. <S> Unless of course there are some ethics involved but that is rare. <S> If you're concerned for your job security do pay attention to what the managers are doing. <S> That could tell you if you need to find a new job or not. <S> As always it is wise to keep your resume up to date regardless. <A> Everyone has their own risk appetite. <S> Some people require a high level of stability in their work environment. <S> Others are fine with turmoil. <S> People have their own reasons for leaving and you just need to figure out why they are leaving. <S> If people are leaving just because they don't like new things then its probably fine. <S> If people are leaving because they are unhappy with it, then you are probably fine too. <S> However, if people you know to be hard workers are leaving because they don't think it will work, then you need to evaluate your situation. <S> With that being said, there is one thing I believe to be universally true: if you see the finance department updating their resumes, you need to be too. <A> I am currently in the heat of a merger and we are seeing a lot of change. <S> This is resulting in people that don't like the direction, or lack there of, to find other work. <S> We have seen a lot of turn over because of this unfortunately. <S> On the other hand I have seen cases where there was little turnover. <S> It all really depends on how things go <S> , what changes, how much it changes, and if those changes were important to people.
| Usually the few that would quit are people that are unsuitable anyway. Or if the work was just so different that they feel they can't learn it and the joint venture was at the expense of other jobs they were doing, rather than extra to them. This is a highly variable question. There are very few circumstances I can think of (never seen it) where people would quit in droves, possibly if there was a major hit to morale for some reason.
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Is it common and appropriate to "throttle" an auditor? I know auditing is done to help the company improve. I work at a software company, and I overheard my boss saying that he knows how to handle an auditor by giving extremely long and time consuming answers to any small question the auditor asks. The auditor was doing an audit of our information security. Even at my previous company, when an auditor was accessing the LAN network and doing some audits, my boss there was talking (jokingly) of throttling the network speed of the LAN the auditor was working on. Another instance: I think I saw this in a TV serial, where the AC was turned on to be too cold in the room auditors were seated. Is it common for workplaces to make an auditors job uncomfortable (even if the auditor is a good, diligent person) or to deliberately stall or drag their work so that they'd ask very few questions, wrap up and get out ASAP? Is this one of the "smart manager" corporate things to do? If it is, and is appropriate, what are the best ways to do it? Update: Note that this is not a situation where the people in the company are trying to trick or hide information from the auditor. These are very intelligent people who know what is good for the company, and are already complying with rules. They just find it an annoying, boring process to be put through the ordeal of answering questions from an auditor. So they make it boring for the auditor too, so that (s)he'd ask fewer questions and complete the audit quickly. The belief at their end is that if they give the auditor a free rein, then the auditor (especially the meticulous ones) will just keep going into more annoyingly boring details which might not even be necessary. <Q> This is an incompetent manager. <S> On a TV show, where reality is optional and the authors can guarantee the idiot isn't caught, it may work. <S> Real life doesn't work that way. <S> If you can't pass an audit without cheating, you have not been doing your job. <S> If you cheat, you are begging not just to be demoted but to be fired. <S> If you get the company sued, expect them to share the pain. <S> The zeroeth commandment applies here: Don't Be Stupid. <A> As an IT auditor myself <S> this behavior is unprofessional and unethical. <S> My job when doing internal audits or an external audit for a client is to help them improve, and not to harm the business I am auditing. <S> The business would certainly want to know about serious risks or deficient processes that endanger the business. <S> As an example, by reporting to management that privileged access control is weak, or software change management is is inadequate through tangible evidence gathered from testing , I am doing a valuable favor to my client. <S> I am bound by my profession' guidelines regarding Evidence and per the guidelines <S> , in the case I am not able to obtain sufficient evidence for the basis of my opinion due to non cooperation of the auditee, I must attempt to obtain evidence by other means if possible and disclose to management. <S> Management should be reasonable to understand that by deliberately hindering my work, I will be digging deeper for the information I requested. <S> It is a non - disputable fact that the business wants to survive. <S> My goal is to assist them by bringing to light obstacles that hinder the business meeting their ultimate goal of survival. <S> Non cooperation only hurts the management of the business - an irrational decision. <A> It's not appropriate to do this, but mainly because it's a passive-aggressive approach to addressing a problem. <S> I've worked for companies going through all kinds of audits, and to be honest, auditors charge by the hour. <S> Some of them are professional but others like to spend a lot more time than they need to. <S> I worked for one multinational that finally got so fed up with their SOX auditors, after providing everything needed for months (and even hiring a large temp staff just to feed them information), they finally had to say "you're done now. <S> Pass us or not, but if not we'll get another firm to do the next one." <S> Suddenly, we passed. <S> What you need to do is to understand what kind of time is reasonable and customary for a given audit and then ask for a clear list of everything needed and timetable from the auditor. <S> Don't accept ' <S> well, I won't know <S> till I know, let's just fish till we're done.' <S> The list of deliverables should be completely delivered day one, and sure, if you can't provide them that's on you, but at least the slippage has a clear cause in that case. <S> Most of the time, this kind of messing with people is a poor man's substitute for actively managing a real problem. <A> Is it common and appropriate to “throttle” an auditor? <S> Generally no, it's neither common nor appropriate in most places. <S> It also depends on whether it's an outside audit or internal. <S> Usually any attempt to interfere with an internal audit is dodgy at best. <S> In some places interfering with outside audits is more understandable, particularly in the third World where corruption is rife and the auditors can have totally different agenda's to their supposed role and may be moonlighting for a competitor or in business for themselves. <S> I recently had a govt Audit department in the third World audit my stuff via an email asking me to list assets and software. <S> I guess they were too busy to show up in person.
| The auditor is there to help your company comply with reasonable rules. It is unethical, and depending on what is being audited for may put the company in serious legal jeopardy, to deliberately make their job more difficult.
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Dealing with boss and his request to (male) employees including myself, how to handle this right? I work for a small firm here in Minnesota; only 30 people work there. Well, 27 men, 3 women. I[m a 37 year old guy, married, to my wife, 34, with a 14 year old daughter in highschool. Our boss (a dude in his 50s) sent a circular email to all employees in the office (well, the guys only) asking them to send him selfies of themselves in their underwear, and that he wanted an "Underwear Friday" every week, where the guys walk around in their underwear (it applies only to the guys according to the email). The email also asked the employees to take selfies of themselves sitting in their underwear on freeways as well (but isn't that illegal; well, sitting on the freeway part anyway?) and then post them on our firm's Twitter, Facebook and Instagram. It also asked some of the guys to walk around the office in a bikini. I found this weird and it crept me out. Our firm deals in graphic design etc. and we have important clients visiting and meetings etc. I confronted the boss on Friday in private after work, told him that this was inappropriate, he said: I'm the boss. You're just gonna have to accept that you'll do what you don't want to at work. ven if it means being in just your pants. God, dude, feel the freedom of being in your pants. Every dude wants to do it, it's gonna be a hoooot!! Fuck it with your complaining, you don't stick it to the man here. Who do you think you are. George fucking Clooney? Give me a break. is your ego as big as your, you know what, your... aaaagh, yah know what I mean. Just show up in your pants next Friday from 9am or else you're not gonna be paid a cent. Got it? It's gonna be hot seeing employees in their pants. BTW, the boss is married, met his wife and son once, they seemed like nice enough guys so why the hell is he doing this? This is weird behavior. The boss is normally straight as an arrow and he now announces this? He's got a reputation around the office as a "Mr. Tough Guy" and straight-talking, and this request is so left-field I don't know what the hell to do. I told him no, he refused to accept it. I freelanced for 18 months before getting the job in March, before now there was no conflict, it was a good job, I've only been there nearly 4 months now. Why would the boss do this? Is this something I could sue over? How should i deal with this? BTW, aside from digital publishing, the boss has also asked me to do some email stuff for him (since I have IT and marketing skills), he occasionally asked me to check his email since he doesn't have time to respond to all of them. I noticed he'd sent an email to a certain female celebrity's management claiming one of the employees has cancer in order to get the celebrity to visit (the employee/my co-worker does not have cancer, he was in my local paper promoting some new community-related initiative a few months ago and was large as life. FFS, the co-worker is 21 and I know him from sports activities anyway!).The employee is a fan of that celebrity, he's seen her in concert, but nothing more than that. Why would my boss do this and what should I do next? Do I need a lawyer? (and hopefully not a Saul Goodman-type one; started watching that on Netflix) Or what next? I like where I work, have no issues with co-workers, but the issue with the boss is causing me so much stress I feel like I could explode. Dealing with this conflict is causing me stress and my wife and daughter are noticing it and I haven't told them why, other than "work stress", partially out of embarrassment. <Q> "Just show up in your pants next Friday from 9am or else you're not gonna be paid a cent. <S> Got it?" <S> Well, that's sexual harrassment, no doubt about that. <S> If you want to be nice, call his wife, tell her what is happening, and maybe she can get him under control. <S> That would be the best possible outcome. <S> The Mathemagician may be correct with his comment, that this could be a brain tumor or something similar that affects him mentally. <S> If not, well, I don't think you will be paid for long anyway, because the company will be gone soon. <S> So start looking for a new job immediately. <S> That has higher priority than any work for clients, for example. <S> There is no need to be stressing about this. <S> Accept that your job and the whole business may be gone soon because being mad is not good for any business, and take that as a base line. <S> Should he do something stupid like not paying you, then it's time to get a lawyer, and as I said earlier, what he's doing is sexual harrassment with tons of witnesses. <S> PS. <S> In the other case, that this is just an a**hole on a power trip, being obviously worried about his health and calling for psychiatric help would be deeply insulting to him, which would also be just exactly what you would want in that case. <A> In situations like this, I just assume the person is on drugs and I move on. <S> This is out of control behaviour, waste of time trying to work out why. <S> Brush up your CV and start job hunting before someone goes off the deep end. <A> I don't know if it's worth trying to reason with someone this unreasonable <S> but, if you do want to try talking to him again, don't do it alone in private. <S> You and your co-workers should speak to him as a group to tell him that this is illegal and no one is going to walk around naked or send nude photos. <S> He might back down when faced with the fact that he'd need to re-hire <S> his entire staff* <S> but you should be prepared for him to make good on his threat. <S> * <S> This includes the women working there too. <S> I can't imagine they want to see all of their male co-workers walking around nude either. <S> Since you mention lawyering up, I want to point out that: All of the laws enforced by [the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission], except for the Equal Pay Act, require you to file a Charge of Discrimination with us before you can file a job discrimination lawsuit against your employer. <S> In addition, an individual, organization, or agency may file a charge on behalf of another person in order to protect the aggrieved person's identity. <S> There are time limits for filing a charge. <S> https://www.eeoc.gov/employees/charge.cfm <S> If you do want to follow through on this (rather than just getting the heck out of Dodge) look into local discrimination laws and see if there are any local organizations that can help you.
| There's nothing you can do about his antics, just ignore them.
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How can I (being lower on my dept's ladder) respectfully tell a 3rd party salesman to wait? I work for a three-person team, and recently we've undergone a project where we are looking for a certain type of software product. Due to the nature of the product, it's a very expensive and therefore a long-winded search and pro/con elimination process. In this process, we'e come really close to selecting one product, so we've gotten multiple quotes and demos, etc. The salesperson for that product now calls or emails 5-6 times a day asking if we're ready to purchase. No one on my team seems to want to tell him to stop. How can I, as a person who is lower on the ladder, and not in charge of the project, politely tell the salesperson to wait? I've been in this situation before where I was in charge and I could simply tell them to stop calling and wait for our answer, but I don't want to overstep my current position, or make my team/company look unprofessional. <Q> My resolution would be to pass it up the chain, give them a contact who can make decisions and they can bug them instead. <S> It's higher up's role to be dealing with these enquiries not yours, so just pass it upwards. <S> "Sorry, I don't have any say in these matters, please direct queries to xxx@mycompany.com. <S> Have a great day. <S> Signed Me." <S> Problem solved (at least for you it is). <A> If the person who is in charge of the project and has the authority to speak definitively with the sales person is not providing a update perhaps there is a reason they have chosen not to. <S> You do not want to start providing updates that you are not authorized to make and may be contrary to your companies goals. <S> Talk to the decision maker and see if there is a reason for not responding and if not volunteer to let the salesperson know the current status. <A> The salesman is trying to do his job as well, and his boss will be pressuring him to get a yea or nay from this company that he's done several presentations to. <S> Help them out. <S> Add a week or two, then when the salesperson calls, give them a date when you'll be making the final decision. <S> And then.... at or before that date, make a decision, and tell all the salespeople whether they won or not. <S> Just because you're looking for a solution doesn't mean that your management will wait until you decide at your leisure, so there really should be an end date to this discovery. <S> If you're unable to get that sort of decision out of your team and management, then you should talk to the team and decide who is the vendor interface. <S> Redirect all calls and emails to that one person; there is no need for every person on a team to be talking directly to vendors. <A> First off, if you are the lowest ring on the totem pole, it is neither your responsibility <S> not you are in a position to speak about a purchase decision. <S> You need to convey this to the salesperson. <S> Usually, for products of this big price tickets, a sales person can only make one or two sales a year or a handful of them at best. <S> And usually these sales people are commission based. <S> Since he knows your company is serious about buying "something" he is just being pesky, trying to get his foot through your door. <S> I personally have very little respect for people wasting my time just because they are going to make a sales commission. <S> In my opinion, your only communication with him should be something like this: " <S> Sorry <S> but I am not the final decision maker in this process <S> and I do not have any knowledge when the powers that be will come down with a decision. <S> As you can imagine, this is a big ticket item and needs to be approved by many levels in my company. <S> I have no control over that process either. <S> Once I get to know what is decided I will let you know. <S> Meanwhile, I'd much appreciate eliminating these email messages, as they can be misconstrued as conflict of interest between myself and your company, which definitely is not the case as both you and I know." <S> And if he was really helpful to you during the process, going above and beyond his call of duty (not just giving the "buy my product pitch"), it would be nice and courteous to let him know about the decision, if his company doesn't get it, in the name of not burning the bridges. <S> Who knows, with the knowledge of his company's product, and/or competing products, you may end up working for them one of these days. <A> Simply tell the salesperson the truth: your team is currently evaluating all the options. <S> Let him know that you will follow up with him no matter the decision that you make. <S> Ask him nicely to make himself available if you have further questions about features or pricing, but let him know there is no need to constantly call until a decision is made. <A> I am presuming that you haven't officially picked their product because of X, Y, or Z isn't working exactly how you would want it to. <S> So the easiest thing to do is say to the sales person. <S> We would really like if X worked like this. <S> Can you call us back when it does? <S> If they call back again and X doesn't work or no update, then I would say something like, "I am assuming now that X will never work how we want it to since I was waiting on an update about that from you? <S> Just let me know <S> so I can add it to our spreadsheet. <S> " <S> I deal with vendors daily. <S> The #1 way to deal with a sales person is to make them concretely deal with a "real/technical" issue with their product. <S> Also if you approach this and they start some double-talk about X then politely ask them to clarify. <S> Then you might have to go with "Sorry Ted, <S> if I can't trust you when we are talking on the phone with being absolutely clear, we are going to have to switch to email to communicate." <S> These two tricks work 95% of the time. <S> The other 5% you just get a brain dead sales person that will call you every time their CRM buzzes them. <S> They will act like they have no/little recollection of past communication. <S> Nothing you can do about this type - and should be the last type you trust during contract negotiation.
| Get together with your team and decide when you'll have a decision by; it's only fair to the salespeople to have a timescale.
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Intentional Suggestion as Warning I just got a new job in a different city in a state with at-will employment at a very small company. My first day at work, a colleague who is close to my boss messages me suggesting a sublet/room that only lasts for two months. I was looking for places for the long run. Is it possible that is an indirect signal from my boss that I could get fired if my performance is not to their liking? Or am I reading into this too much? <Q> A two month sublet might be an excellent place to stay while you look for your real home . <S> Finding the best house/apartment/condo/ <S> whatever is not something done over night. <A> If anything I think that is a good sign. <S> People don't try to help out people or get involved in their living arrangement if they don't like the person or think the person would get fired. <S> It is very natural to scope an area out for a month or two before signing a long-term lease or buying something. <S> It sounds to me like boss's friend is hooking you up. <S> You can read more into it <S> but that is how I would read it. <A> I think your reading to much into it. <S> Buying a house takes months, maybe years, depending on "things". <S> Finding a good apartment to rent can take even longer. <S> I was waiting 3 years to get into my dream apartment. <S> A short lease is a good first step. <S> You don't want to be tied to a 12 month lease when your dream house comes on market. <S> Most apartments in this area will not even rent to you unless you have been at your current job for several months, and have good history. <S> If you have a bad history or are new in the area, then your not going to get a good apartment. <S> I would see this as someone trying to help out, and nothing more.
| This is just a guess, but I think you're reading way too much into this .
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How can I best respond to "reasonable" personal questions from co-workers? I am engaged, but we are not planning to get married for at least a couple years, for our own financial reasons which I don't feel like explaining. I work in a fairly small and close workplace where people are friendly, and the word Fiancee inevitably elicits the question, " When are you getting married? " I don't want to explain the financial reasons, and I have never been good at evading a direct question. So does anyone have a reasonable way of getting out of answering what seems like a perfectly reasonable question? I have tried things like, "not right away", or, "we are planning it now". But people who haven't gotten an answer just ask again periodically. My Supervisor asked and I did not feel like I could evade, so I explained it, and she said that she knew other people in the same situation. But I don't feel like telling everyone a personal answer, and I wish for this question to stop being asked. Is there any way or do I just go on feeling evasive and shameful whenever it comes up? Thank you. Please Note: I do not feel that this is a duplicate of other questions because in this case it is almost a knee-jerk response for people to ask me this particular question, so I don't feel it is nosy or unprofessional, I just don't want to have it come up. Is there a simple and polite response, like: " I would rather not explain why it has to be delayed, because I would rather be married now. "? Based on a late answer, I realized that I had not considered that anyone would really want to know, or be likely to want to attend, buy gifts or whatever. I simply don't get involved with people at work except for a face to face, in the moment conversation. I don't much do that with anyone else in my life either. It is now or never, and that almost always means that I have no chosen interactions with people at all. Their perspective of being connected to me is mystifying. I intend to see my Fiancee again. Everyone else might as well have "rolled underneath the sofa". When they are in front of me, their are my whole world though. I heard a Radio Preacher say, " To Jesus, Ministry was the person standing in front of him at the time. " That is how I operate, too. <Q> You need to come up with a answer that YOU are comfortable with if this is going to continue to be a issue. <S> Whatever it is keep it simple and consistent. <S> If you dont want to provide more information, dont allow yourself to feel pressure to do so. <S> It isn't any of their business! <S> Good luck and congratulations on your pending nuptials. <S> :) <A> Wow, lots of lies, stories and secret squirrel stuff in the other answers! <S> This isn't a tough one, simply say something like : <S> "It's going to take us a couple of years to be able to have the wedding we really want, so we've decided to wait until then, <S> but I'll let you know when we know!" <S> Tells them without giving anything personal away, and doesn't make them think they're being shut out, so they should stop pestering you. <A> I don't see why anyone would really fire a follow-up question to that. <S> I'm not engaged, but I've been living with someone for 8 years <S> and we have 2 kids, and I occasionally had people asking me when we'd get married. <S> I simply said neither of us wanted to, for too many reasons to get into. <S> And it's not like I didn't want to talk about it <S> , it's really just that I didn't want to spend the time to talk about it. <S> Or actually simply said neither of us wanted to. <S> Period. <S> Also: <S> Another way around this is to stop using specific words. <S> I stopped saying "partner" and switched to "wife", even though we're not married. <S> No more questions. <S> Bugged me a bit out of principle, but eh, life is too short. <S> Don't mind to tell people to bugger off so much. <S> ;) <S> Apart from 2 times where the same nosy co-worker came back with a follow-up or a flat-out guilt-trip ("so, when are you going to make an honest lady out of her, eh?"), it always stopped at that. <S> And when the nosy-type fires, just fire back ("so you're saying my partner is not honest?!"). <S> Gets awkward, silence ensues, people move on. <S> It's fine. <S> Obviously, other evasion tactics are great as well. <S> Any "oh by the way, that makes me think, X, how are things with Y?" <S> But as you say you're not good at that <S> I don't suppose it's your favorite route. <S> Whereas the above recommendations above are not evasive or elusive: you just block the question. <S> (Surprisingly, it appears that when my partner was using the same approach, people where nosier and trying to find out if I had convinced her to give up marriage or something. <S> Oh well. <S> Guess some things look too unatural to some people, and they've got too much free time on theirs hands.) <A> I generally like poking fun of people who are being too nosy or make them feel bad. <S> When are we getting married? <S> You offering to chip in? <S> May 28, 2019 - pick a random date in the future. <S> Make up a story. <S> Your astrologist told you that date was good luck. <S> Not sure. <S> We have both been so frisky since engagement I am afraid to follow through. <S> Our accountant said we would lose money the next few years if we got married. <S> So unless someone is willing to make up the difference we are cool the way we are. <A> One option is to set a date 2-3 years in the future and just work from that. <S> It doesn't have to be really, truly honestly the date you're committed to, but it would probably be convenient if it was a probable one. <S> At least some of your coworkers are probably hoping for invites and want to know how long until they have to buy gifts and so on. <S> A variant of that would be "not for at least a year", which addresses the planning question and might help people who are genuinely wanting to plan/help. <S> If you're definitely not intending to invite anyone from work, you could say that. <S> People may be offended, even if you're shocked that they might be. <S> It's basically what you're doing now, but phrased in a more closed way. <S> I suspect you could work up a series of open vs closed answers that you could run through. <S> I had close friends at school who got married with just their parents invited (not even siblings!) <S> and some people were surprised... <S> I was surprised that anyone who knew them was surprised (I hope that makes sense). <S> I've been in my current role for more than three years now <S> and I still get "when will you buy a car" questions from my car-dependent coworkers <S> (answer: "still never"). <S> It's just part of the background noise, and it seems to be a combination of most people having a fairly limited variation in their friendship circles and limited energy to track things like this. <S> If 99% of the people you all know are either married, unmarried or "planning the wedding", the category "planning the wedding" is likely to be homogenised in people's minds and their reactions will likely be based 99% on their experience, and 1% on listening to you specifically.
| Another option is to be honest, but limited "when we can afford to". A response to "When are you getting married" of "Meh, we haven't set a date and are happy how we are" is more that sufficient for any casual coworker or boss. Just say neither of you are in a rush, and there's no particular reason. If you want to evade, I'd look for a way out of the conversation. In my experience you really do just have to live with most of those ok-but-tedious questions.
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How to interview a candidate from a different industry or area of expertise? I haven't found a similar question, but if there is one, my apologies. Let's say I need to interview someone for a role which is not in my area of expertise (not even in the same industry), and there's nobody else in the company who knows about that topic well enough. How should I approach the interviewing process? For example, I'm in a small startup with a few Software Engineers and we need to hire someone to take care of Sales or Marketing. Obviously, our knowledge of those industries is very limited, and definitely not enough to assess if a candidate is good enough from the technical point of view. <Q> In these cases you have a couple of options. <S> Look for someone with solid proven experience and good references and hope they are what they seem. <S> Selling things and themselves is a salespersons forte. <S> Someone whose expertise is personally known is another way. <S> I have done this many times for clients when they need to interview technicians, I'll come in with HR and take the technical part of the interviews, and then give a report and recommendation afterwards. <S> Then we'll all sit down and discuss which candidate looks best from all perspectives. <S> My preference would be to get a subject matter expert in for the interviews, I have seen a few disasters where someone has bluffed their way into a job they're just not suitable for. <S> Any interviewing is risky, so it's best to minimise that whenever possible. <A> Let's say I need to interview someone for a role which is not in my area of expertise (not even in the same industry), and there's nobody else in the company who knows about that topic well enough. <S> How should I approach the interviewing process? <S> That happens a lot in small startups. <S> A group of folks with similar experience get together and start a company. <S> But often, none of them has ever started a company before, and lack the experience necessary to hire for all the roles. <S> The approach that many startups use is to rely on board members or to bring in consultants to help get things launched. <S> Look through your personal networks for people who have done this sort of hiring before, or who know people who have helped a startup do this. <S> You might also want to check out https://startups.stackexchange.com/ <A> Reach out to your local chamber of commerce and see if they have anyone with expertise that may be able to help you. <S> Also, if you have anyone in your extended network who could come by and do interviews for you, you may want to take that approach. <S> Finally, there are HR companies who will interview candidates for you
| Get someone in to help with the interviews.
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How to politely decline a job responsibility? I'm looking for some advice on how to say no to a recent temporary role I've been forced into taking. Recently, I was asked to take the position of 'lead' on a project management position which I politely rejected. Unfortunately, my name was still assigned to this position after telling 3 different managers this role wouldn't suit me. I'm continuing to receive emails regarding expected deliveries even though I've already told my manager multiple times that this position wouldn't suit me and that it is in fact a step away from the direction I would like my career to go. How do I politely tell them to find someone else for this? <Q> This is a great case of being your own worst enemy. <S> I've done everything from clean graffiti off of road signs to project management at a prestigious financial firm. <S> If you want to get off what you consider "grunt duty" or some other derisive term, here is my advice. <S> Work hard <S> Work <S> well Work without complaint Work with enthusiasm <S> Treat Even the most insignificant task with reverence <S> Respect <S> your superiors Understand that as the newbie, you WILL be disrespected. <S> Suck it up, toughen up, and get the job done <S> Leave your temper at home, it has no place at work <S> Ask don't demand Negotiate <S> Right now, you are coming across as an insolent child who is throwing a tantrum. <S> This will get you nowhere. <S> Act like a professional, do your work, and ask questions like, " <S> For my next task, I would like to stretch my talents a bit. <S> That shows initiative instead of insolence. <A> People in all jobs have to do tasks <S> they don't want to do. <S> The work needs to get done and like it or not you are the one they have selected to do it. <S> Your manager said: He explained that I wasn't appointed 'lead' for this project and that there was no 'lead', we're currently looking for one. <S> Well the work on the project can't stop while they find someone to be a lead. <S> So you have to do it until then. <S> It seems to me he told you that you were not doing it forever. <S> That doesn't change the due date of the deliverables in the meantime. <S> Professionals accept things like this. <S> The PM is right in what she is doing by assigning the work to someone until the lead is found. <S> So you have zero cause to be mad at her. <S> By the way, your behavior has probably marked you out as someone who will not be given more interesting work or projects. <S> You need to be aware of your reputation at the company and you are now identified as someone who refuses career-enhancing tasks, who behaves like a child about and who is generally unpleasant and uncooperative. <A> It's quite common as an employee to be asked to perform a task one doesn't want to do. <S> It's also not unheard of for managers to take the course of least resistance when assigning work -- give the mundane tasks to the person who is most junior, or one who is unlikely to say no, even if that person is very busy already. <S> In those situations you have to be creative and positive. <S> Give constructive reasons why you are not the best person for the task. <S> Talk with others to see who might want to trade work with you. <S> You may not get out of the work, but you'll certainly get farther than if you resort to telling your superiors where they can go, and what they can do when they get there. <A> Let's look at the options: you are a good employee, they feel really bad about having to make you do this role knowing you don't want to but feel that they need you in it right now. <S> They will make it up to you once project is over. <S> you are an OK employee, they want you to do this because no one else wants to or they don't want to hire someone to do it. <S> They don't care about you being pissed because they view you as an "OK" employee. <S> you are a OK/Good employee and your boss made a promise <S> he/she needs to stand by and hung you out to dry. <S> Only if you are more valuable than your boss to your company will anyone care. <S> you are a bad employee and they just needed to throw you some where. <S> you are a bad employee, knew this didn't meet your skill sets, want to see you fail so they can fire you. <S> you are a good employee, you work for a bunch of ass clowns who do random things and make no sense out of anything. <S> They don't want to give in, <S> well because they are ass clowns. <S> So either this is temporary and they will make it up to you (doesn't seem like it), your manager is hanging you out to dry, they don't think much of you, or you work for clowns. <S> Most of these scenarios show that you should be looking for a new job not ranting about current one.
| Sometimes the best course of action is to accept the responsibility, and get it over with quickly.
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How to negotiate for reduction of travel at new job? I recently moved to a new city with my husband, and we live about 20 minutes outside of town. I was thrilled to get a job offer that had great pay/benefits and has a main office in our new city (they have multiple locations). During my first interview, I was told this position had the option of working out of the main office (where we moved) or another location an hour away. Obviously I chose the location we are closest to. The supervisor has staff at both locations, so he travels back and forth weekly. After reviewing the job offer I asked about travel, and was told I would need to commute an hour to the other location about 4 times per week. It's very strange to me that they said this, considering they gave me the location option early in the interview process, and we had agreed on the closest office. I don't want to lose this offer, but I can't commute that far 4 times per week. What's the best approach to negotiate this while still keeping my job? <Q> If you can't commute that far 4x a week then you simply need to tell them that. <S> In <S> a very polite way mention you thought you had the option and had disclosed to them <S> you wanted to work in the main office in the first interview. <S> If they strong arm you <S> then you may have more reason not to work for this company than just the commute. <S> If they do strong arm you and you need the money <S> then maybe take the job and look for another. <S> When you find one resign. <S> I would not feel guilty about resigning if they changed the rules last minute. <S> I worked for a company that had a policy a transfer 50 miles away not a transfer and sure enough <S> I got that transfer <S> but it was a position that was good for my career. <A> Given that they will let you work at that location 1 day a week means that you can work at that location. <S> It just seems they would rather you work at the other location for whatever reasons - maybe to be next to other team members or whatever. <S> I would suggest that you do the math. <S> How much do you make per hour? <S> How much wear/tear will the drive put on your car plus gas? <S> An hour commute can also turn into 1.5-2 hours with traffic. <S> At a minimum you are looking at "working" an extra 6-8 hours a week. <S> Which is about 15-20% of your salary with everything else involved. <S> So I would simply counter. <S> Say - <S> "I gave you a salary based on me working at the location nearest me. <S> With the extra commute hours plus extra expenses I would now need to make XXXXX (at least 15% more). <S> " <S> I would also mention to them that you do not mind working at the other location maybe for 3-4 weeks as you are being trained but would then expect to work at the closer location. <S> Once you accept the job working at the further location you have no leverage. <A> It sounds like you need to weigh the actual cost of the commute. <S> Ask yourself the following: If you had to commute 5 times a week, would that job still be worth it? <S> Are you willing to re-enter the job market and risk not finding another position? <S> Or finding a position with lower pay/less optimal hours/a longer commute? <S> Once you have determined these things, if you really think that the job is not worthwhile given the 4x weekly commute, talk to the person who hired you. <S> Be vocal and communicate that you are unwilling or unable to make the commute for reasons <S> A, B <S> ... <S> Chances are, if you go this route, you will see at least some improvement. <S> Maybe that means not commuting at all, maybe it means fewer times each week. <S> Best of luck!
| Convey that you have a strong desire to hold the position, but that you simply cannot do so given the commute and your initial agreement to work in the city.
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