Name
stringlengths 1
62
| URL
stringlengths 45
106
| Script URL
stringlengths 32
93
| Writers
stringlengths 7
102
| Genres
stringlengths 5
60
| Date
stringclasses 72
values | Script
listlengths 0
7.34k
|
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
10 Things I Hate About You
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/10 Things I Hate About You Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/10-Things-I-Hate-About-You.html
|
Karen McCullah Lutz, Kirsten Smith, William Shakespeare
|
Comedy, Romance
|
1997
|
[
"Ten Things I Hate About You - by Karen McCullah Lutz & Kirsten Smith",
"TEN THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU",
"written by Karen McCullah Lutz & Kirsten Smith",
"based on 'Taming of the Shrew\" by William Shakespeare",
"Revision November 12, 1997",
"PADUA HIGH SCHOOL - DAY",
"Welcome to Padua High School, your typical urban-suburban high school in Portland, Oregon.",
"Smarties, Skids, Preppies, Granolas.",
"Loners, Lovers, the In and the Out Crowd rub sleep out of their eyes and head for the main building.",
"PADUA HIGH PARKING LOT - DAY",
"KAT STRATFORD, eighteen, pretty -- but trying hard not to be -- in a baggy granny dress and glasses, balances a cup of coffee and a backpack as she climbs out of her battered, baby blue '75 Dodge Dart.",
"A stray SKATEBOARD clips her, causing her to stumble and spill her coffee, as well as the contents of her backpack.",
"The young RIDER dashes over to help, trembling when he sees who his board has hit.",
"RIDER Hey -- sorry.",
"Cowering in fear, he attempts to scoop up her scattered belongings.",
"KAT Leave it",
"He persists.",
"KAT (continuing) I said, leave it!",
"She grabs his skateboard and uses it to SHOVE him against a car, skateboard tip to his throat.",
"He whimpers pitifully and she lets him go.",
"A path clears for her as she marches through a pack of fearful students and SLAMS open the door, entering school.",
"INT. GIRLS' ROOM - DAY",
"BIANCA STRATFORD, a beautiful sophomore, stands facing the mirror, applying lipstick.",
"Her less extraordinary, but still cute friend, CHASTITY stands next to her.",
"BIANCA Did you change your hair?",
"CHASTITY No.",
"BIANCA You might wanna think about it",
"Leave the girls' room and enter the hallway.",
"HALLWAY - DAYCONTINUOUS",
"Bianca is immediately greeted by an admiring crowd, both boys and girls alike.",
"BOY (adoring) Hey, Bianca.",
"GIRL Awesome shoes.",
"The greetings continue as Chastity remains wordless and unaddressed by her side.",
"Bianca smiles proudly, acknowledging her fans.",
"GUIDANCE COUNSELOR'S OFFICE - DAY",
"CAMERON JAMES, a clean-cut, easy-going senior with an open, farm-boy face, sits facing Miss Perky, an impossibly cheery guidance counselor.",
"MISS PERKY",
"I'm sure you won't find Padua any different than your old school.",
"Same little asswipe mother-fuckers everywhere.",
"Her plastic smile never leaves her face.",
"Cameron fidgets in his chair uncomfortably.",
"MISS PERKY (continuing)",
"Any questions?",
"CAMERON I don't think so, ma'am",
"MISS PERKY",
"Then go forth.",
"Scoot I've got deviants to see.",
"Cameron rises to leave and makes eye contact with PATRICK VERONA, a sullen-looking bad ass senior who waits outside Ms Perky's door.",
"His slouch and smirk let us know how cool he is.",
"Miss Perky looks down at her file and up at Patrick",
"MISS PERKY (continuing) Patrick Verona.",
"I see we're making our visits a weekly ritual.",
"She gives him a withering glance.",
"He answers with a charming smile.",
"PATRICK I missed you.",
"MISS PERKY",
"It says here you exposed yourself to a group of freshmen girls.",
"PATRICK It was a bratwurst.",
"I was eating lunch.",
"MISS PERKY",
"With the teeth of your zipper?",
"She motions for Patrick to enter her office and Cameron shuffles out the door, bumping into MICHAEL ECKMAN, a lanky, brainy senior who will either end up a politician or game show host.",
"MICHAEL You the new guy?",
"CAMERON",
"So they tell me...",
"MICHAEL C'mon.",
"I'm supposed to give you the tour.",
"They head out of the office",
"MICHAEL (continuing) So -- which Dakota you from?",
"CAMERON North, actually.",
"How'd you ?",
"MICHAEL I was kidding.",
"People actually live there?",
"CAMERON Yeah.",
"A couple.",
"We're outnumbered by the cows, though.",
"MICHAEL How many people were in your old school?",
"CAMERON Thirty-two.",
"MICHAEL Get out!",
"CAMERON How many people go here?",
"MICHAEL Couple thousand.",
"Most of them evil",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAYCONTINUOUS",
"Prom posters adorn the wall.",
"Michael steers Cameron through the crowd as he points to various cliques.",
"MICHAEL We've got your basic beautiful people.",
"Unless they talk to you first, don't bother.",
"The beautiful people pass, in full jock/cheerleader splendor.",
"MICHAEL (continuing)",
"Those 're your cowboys.",
"Several Stetson-wearing, big belt buckle.",
"Wrangler guys walk by.",
"CAMERON",
"That I'm used to.",
"MICHAEL Yeah, but these guys have never seen a horse.",
"They just jack off to Clint Eastwood.",
"They pass an espresso cart with a group of teens huddled around it.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) To the right, we have the Coffee Kids.",
"Very edgy.",
"Don't make any sudden movements around them.",
"EXT. SCHOOL COURTYARD - DAY",
"Michael continues the tour",
"MICHAEL And these delusionals are the White Rastae.",
"Several white boys in dreadlocks and Jamaican knit berets lounge on the grass.",
"A cloud of pot smoke hovers above them",
"MICHAEL (continuing) Big Marley fans. Think they're black.",
"Semi-political, but mostly, they watch a lot of Wild Kingdom, if you know what I mean.",
"Michael waves to DEREK, the one with the longest dreads.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) Derek - save some for after lunch, bub?",
"DEREK (very stoned) Michael, my brother, peace",
"Cameron turns to follow Michael as they walk into the cafeteria.",
"CAMERON",
"So where do you fit in all this?",
"INT. CAFETERIA - DAY - CONTINUOUS",
"Loud music and loud students.",
"Michael sits with a group of studious-looking teens.",
"MICHAEL Future MBAs-",
"We're all Ivy League, already accepted.",
"Someday I'll be sipping Merlot while those guys --",
"He points to the table of jocks, as they torture various passers-by.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) are fixing my Saab.",
"Yuppie greed is back, my friend.",
"He points proudly to the ALLIGATOR on his shirt.",
"Cameron stops listening as BIANCA walks by, and we go SLO MO.",
"Pure and perfect, she passes Cameron and Michael without a look.",
"Cameron is smitten",
"CAMERON That girl -- I --",
"MICHAEL You burn, you pine, you perish?",
"CAMERON Who is she?",
"MICHAEL Bianca Stratford.",
"Sophomore.",
"Don't even think about it",
"CAMERON Why not?",
"MICHAEL I could start with your haircut, but it doesn't matter.",
"She's not allowed to date until her older sister does.",
"And that's an impossibility.",
"ENGLISH CLASS - DAY",
"A room full of bored seniors doodle and scare off into space MS.",
"BLAISE, the one-step-away-from-medication English Teacher, tries to remember what she's talking about.",
"MRS.",
"BLAISE",
"Well, then.",
"Oh, yes.",
"I guess that does it for our analysis of The Old Man and the Sea.",
"Any other comments?",
"(with dread) Kat?",
"Kat, the girl we saw as we entered the school, slowly cakes off her glasses and speaks up.",
"KAT Why didn't we just read the Hardy Boys?",
"MRS.",
"BLAISE I'm sorry?",
"KAT This book is about a guy and his fishing habit.",
"Not exactly a crucial topic.",
"The other students roll their eyes.",
"KAT (continuing) Frankly, I'm baffled as to why we still revere Hemingway.",
"He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who had a lot of cats.",
"JOEY DORSEY, a well-muscled jock with great cheekbones, makes fun of her from his row.",
"JOEY As opposed to a bitter self-righteous hag who has no friends?",
"A few giggles.",
"Kat ignores him.",
"A practiced gesture",
"MRS.",
"BLAISE That's enough, Mr. Dorsey.",
"Really gets fired up now",
"KAT I guess the school board thinks because Hemingway's male and an asshole, he's worthy of our time",
"She looks up at Ms. Blaise, who is now fighting with her pill box.",
"KAT (continuing)",
"What about Colette? Charlotte Bronte?",
"Simone de Beauvoir?",
"Patrick, lounging in his seat in the back row, elbows a crusty-looking crony, identified by the name SCURVY, embroidered on his workshirt.",
"PATRICK Mother Goose?",
"The class titters.",
"Kat wears an expression of intolerance",
"INT. GUIDANCE COUNSELOR'S OFFICE - DAY",
"Kat now sits before Miss Perky.",
"MISS PERKY Katarina Stratford.",
"My, my.",
"You've been terrorizing Ms. Blaise again.",
"KAT Expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action.",
"MISS PERKY",
"Well, yes, compared to your other choices of expression this year, today's events are quite mild.",
"By the way, Bobby Rictor's gonad retrieval operation went quite well, in case you're interested.",
"KAT I still maintain that he kicked himself in the balls.",
"I was merely a spectator.",
"MISS PERKY",
"The point is Kat -- people perceive you as somewhat ...",
"Kat smiles at her, daring her to say it.",
"KAT Tempestuous?",
"MISS PERKY",
"No ...",
"I believe \"heinous bitch\" is the term used most often.",
"She grimaces, as if she's referring to a medical condition.",
"MISS PERKY (continuing)",
"You might want to work on that",
"Kat rises from her chair with a plastic smile matching the counselor's.",
"KAT As always, thank you for your excellent guidance.",
"INT. SOPHOMORE ENGLISH CLASS - DAY",
"Bianca ignores the droning teacher as she writes a note in big flowing handwriting.",
"TEACHER (0.S.)",
"I realize the language of Mr. Shakespeare makes him a bit daunting, but I'm sure you're all doing your best.",
"Bianca folds the note and passes it behind her with a flip of her hair to CHASTITY.",
"Chastity opens the note and reads:",
"INSERT - \"JOEY DORSEY SAID HI TO ME IN THE HALL! OH! MY GOD!\"",
"Chastity frowns to herself.",
"TEACHER (0.S.) (continuing) Ms. Stratford, do you care to comment on what you've read so far?",
"Bianca looks up and smiles the smile of Daddy's little girl.",
"BIANCA Not really.",
"The teacher shakes her head, but lets it go.",
"MANDELLA.",
"a waif-like senior girl who sits off to the side trying to slit her wrist with the plastic spiral on her notebook, looks up and raises her hand.",
"TEACHER Mandella -- since you're assisting us, you might as well comment.",
"I'm assuming you read the assignment.",
"MANDELLA Uh, yeah,",
"I read it all",
"TEACHER The whole play^",
"MANDELIA The whole folio.",
"All the plays.",
"TEACHER (disbelieving) You've read every play by William Shakespeare?",
"MANDELLA Haven't you?",
"She raises a challenging eyebrow.",
"The stunned teacher doesn't answer and goes to call on the next student.",
"EXT. SCHOOL COURTYARD - DAY",
"Mandella and Kat sit down in the quiet corner.",
"They are eating a carton of yogurt with gusto.",
"MANDELLA",
"Your sister is so amazingly without.",
"She'll never read him.",
"She has no idea.",
"Kat attacks",
"KAT",
"The fact that you're cutting gym so you can T.A. Sophomore English just to hear his name, is a little without in itself if you ask me.",
"Kat's attention is caught by Patrick as he walks by with his friends, lighting up a cigarette.",
"Mandella notices her staring.",
"MANDELLA Who's that?",
"KAT Patrick Verona Random skid.",
"MANDELLA That's Pat Verona?",
"The one who was gone for a year?",
"I heard he was doing porn movies.",
"KAT I'm sure he's completely incapable of doing anything that interesting.",
"MANDELLA He always look so",
"KAT Block E?",
"Kat turns back to face Mandella and forces her yogurt into Mandella's hand.",
"KAT (continuing) Mandella, eat.",
"Starving yourself is a very slow way to die.",
"MANDELLA Just a little.",
"She eats.",
"Kat sees her wrist",
"KAT What's this?",
"MANDELLA An attempted slit.",
"Kat stares at her, expressionless.",
"KAT I realize that the men of this fine institution are severely lacking, but killing yourself so you can be with William Shakespeare is beyond the scope of normal teenage obsessions.",
"You're venturing far past daytime talk show fodder and entering the world of those who need very expensive therapy.",
"MANDELLA",
"But imagine the things he'd say during sex.",
"Thinks a minute",
"KAT Okay, say you do it.",
"You kill yourself, you end up in wherever you end up and he's there.",
"Do you really think he's gonna wanna dace a ninety pound compulsive who failed volleyball?",
"Mandella's attention is struck by Bianca",
"ACROSS THE COURTYARD",
"As she and Chastity parade by Joey and his COHORTS One of the cohorts elbows Joey.",
"COHORT Virgin alert.",
"Joey looks up and smiles at Bianca.",
"JOEY Lookin' good, ladies.",
"Bianca smiles her coyest of smiles.",
"BACK TO KAT AND MANDELLA Still watching.",
"MANDELLA Tragic.",
"Doesn't respond",
"ANOTHER ANGLE",
"Michael and Cameron observe Joey's leers at Bianca from their bench in another corner.",
"Cowboys eating cue of a can of beans linger on the grass behind them.",
"CAMERON Why do girls like that always like guys like that?",
"MICHAEL Because they're bred to.",
"Their mothers liked guys like that, and their grandmothers before them.",
"Their gene pool is rarely diluted.",
"CAMERON He always have that shit-eating grin?",
"MICHAEL Joey Dorsey?",
"Perma-shit-grin.",
"I wish I could say he's a moron, but he's number twelve in the class.",
"And a model.",
"Mostly regional stuff, but he's rumored to have a big tube sock ad coming out.",
"The BELL rings, and the cowboys stand and spit into their empty bean cans.",
"Cameron and Michael rise as Cameron tries to catch a glimpse of Bianca as she walks back inside.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) You know French?",
"CAMERON Sure do ...",
"my Mom's from Canada",
"MICHAEL Guess who just signed up for a tutor?",
"CAMERON You mean I'd get a chance to talk to her?",
"MICHAEL You could consecrate with her, my friend.",
"Cameron watches as Bianca flounces back into the building.",
"EXT. SCHOOL PARKING LOT - DAY",
"Kat and Mandella walk toward Kat's car.",
"Joey pulls up beside her in his Viper.",
"JOEY (re her dress)",
"The vintage look is over, Kat.",
"Haven't you been reading your Sassy?",
"KAT Yeah, and I noticed the only part of you featured in your big Kmart spread was your elbow.",
"Tough break.",
"JOEY (practically spitting)",
"They're running the rest of me next month.",
"He zooms away as Kat yanks open the door of her Dart.",
"Mandella ties a silk scarf around her head, as if they're in a convertible.",
"KAT The people at this school are so incredibly foul.",
"MANDELLA You could always go with me.",
"I'm sure William has some friends.",
"They watch Joey's car as he slows next to Bianca and Chastity as they walk toward the school bus.",
"ON BIANCA AND CHASTITY",
"JOEY Need a ride, ladies?",
"Bianca and Chastity can't get in Joey's car fast enough.",
"He pulls away with a smile.",
"BACK TO KAT AND MANDELLA",
"Mandella lowers her sunglasses to watch.",
"MANDELLA That's a charming new development",
"Kat doesn't answer, but reaches over and puts a tape in the tape deck.",
"The sounds of JOYFUL PUNK ROCK fill the car.",
"As they pull out, Michael crosses in front of them on his moped.",
"Kat has to SLAM the brakes to keep from hitting him",
"KAT (yelling) Remove head from sphincter!",
"Then pedal!",
"Michael begins fearfully, pedaling as Kat PEELS out, angry at the delay.",
"Cameron rushes over",
"CAMERON You all right?",
"He slows to a stop",
"MICHAEL Yeah, just a minor encounter with the shrew.",
"CAMERON That's her?",
"Bianca's sister?",
"MICHAEL The mewling, rampalian wretch herself.",
"Michael putters off, leaving Cameron dodging Patrick's grimy, grey Jeep -- a vehicle several years and many paint jobs away from its former glory as a REGULATION MAIL TRUCK - - as he sideswipes several cars on his way out of the lot.",
"INT. STRATFORD HOUSE - DAY",
"SHARON STRATFORD, attractive and focused, sits in front of her computer, typing quickly.",
"A shelf next to her holds several bodice-ripper romance novels, bearing her name.",
"Kat stands behind her, reading over her shoulder as she types.",
"KAT \"Undulating with desire, Adrienne removes her crimson cape, revealing her creamy --\"",
"WALTER STRATFORD, a blustery, mad scientist-type obstetrician, enters through the front door, wearing a doctor's white jacket and carrying his black bag.",
"WALTER",
"I hope dinner's ready because I only have ten minutes before Mrs. Johnson squirts out a screamer.",
"He grabs the mail and rifles through it, as he bends down to kiss Sharon on the cheek.",
"SHARON In the microwave.",
"WALTER (to Kat) Make anyone cry today?",
"KAT Sadly, no.",
"But it's only four-thirty.",
"Bianca walks in.",
"KAT (continuing) Where've you been?",
"BIANCA (eyeing Walter)",
"Nowhere... Hi, Daddy.",
"She kisses him on the cheek",
"WALTER Hello, precious.",
"Walter kisses Bianca back as Kat heads up the stairs",
"KAT How touching.",
"Walter holds up a letter to Kat",
"WALTER What's this?",
"It says Sarah Lawrence?",
"Snatches it away from him.",
"KAT I guess I got in",
"Sharon looks up from her computer.",
"SHARON What's a synonym for throbbing?",
"WALTER Sarah Lawrence is on the other side of the country.",
"KAT I know.",
"WALTER I thought we decided you were going to school here.",
"At U of 0.",
"KAT You decided.",
"BIANCA Is there even a question that we want her to stay?",
"Kat gives Bianca an evil look then smiles sweetly at",
"KAT Ask Bianca who drove her home",
"SHARON Swollen...turgid.",
"WALTER (to Bianca; upset)",
"Who drove you home?",
"Bianca glares at Kat then turns to Walter",
"BIANCA Now don't get upset.",
"Daddy, but there's this boy...",
"and I think he might ask...",
"WALTER No!",
"You're not dating until your sister starts dating.",
"End of discussion.",
"BIANCA",
"What if she never starts dating?",
"WALTER Then neither will you.",
"And I'll get to sleep at night.",
"BIANCA",
"But it's not fair -- she's a mutant, Daddy!",
"KAT This from someone whose diary is devoted to favorite grooming tips?",
"WALTER Enough!",
"He pulls out a small tape recorder from his black bag.",
"WALTER (continuing) Do you know what this is?",
"He hits the \"play' button and SHRIEKS OF PAIN emanate from the tape recorder.",
"BIANCA AND WALTER (in unison, by rote) The sound of a fifteen-year-old in labor.",
"WALTER This is why you're not dating until your sister does.",
"BIANCA",
"But she doesn't want to date.",
"WALTER",
"Exactly my point",
"His BEEPER goes off and he grabs his bag again",
"WALTER (continuing) Jesus!",
"Can a man even grab a sandwich before you women start dilating?",
"SHARON Tumescent!",
"WALTER (to Sharon; as he leaves)",
"You're not helping.",
"INT. TUTORING ROOM - DAY",
"Cameron sits with an empty chair beside him.",
"Bianca arrives in a flurry of blonde hair.",
"BIANCA Can we make this quick?",
"Roxanne Korrine and Andrew Barrett are having an incredibly horrendous public breakup on the quad.",
"Again.",
"CAMERON Well, I thought we'd start with pronunciation, if that's okay with you.",
"BIANCA Not the hacking and gagging and spitting part.",
"Please.",
"CAMERON (looking down)",
"Okay...",
"then how 'bout we try out some French cuisine.",
"Saturday?",
"Night?",
"Bianca smiles slowly",
"BIANCA You're asking me out.",
"That's so cute.",
"What's your name again?",
"CAMERON (embarrassed) Forget it.",
"Bianca seizes an opportunity.",
"BIANCA No, no, it's my fault -- we didn't have a proper introduction ---",
"CAMERON Cameron.",
"BIANCA The thing is, Cameron --",
"I'm at the mercy of a particularly hideous breed of loser.",
"My sister.",
"I can't date until she does.",
"CAMERON Seems like she could get a date easy enough...",
"She fingers a lock of her hair.",
"He looks on, dazzled.",
"BIANCA",
"The problem is, she's completely anti-social.",
"CAMERON Why?",
"BIANCA Unsolved mystery.",
"She used to be really popular when she started high school, then it was just like she got sick of it or something.",
"CAMERON",
"That's a shame.",
"She reaches out and touches his arm",
"BIANCA Gosh, if only we could find Kat a boyfriend...",
"CAMERON Let me see what I can do.",
"Cameron smiles, having no idea how stupid he is",
"INT. BIOLOGY CLASS",
"A frog is being torn asunder by several prongs and picks.",
"Michael and Cameron go for the spleen.",
"MICHAEL You're in school for one day and you ask out the most beautiful girl?",
"Do you have no concept of the high school social code?",
"Cameron grins away",
"CAMERON I teach her French, get to know her, dazzle her with charm",
"and she falls in love with me.",
"MICHAEL Unlikely, but even so, she still can't go out with you.",
"So what's the point?",
"Cameron motions with his head toward Patrick, a few lab tables away.",
"He's wearing biker glasses instead of goggles as he tries to revive his frog.",
"CAMERON What about him?",
"MICHAEL (confused) You wanna go out with him?",
"The others at the lab table raise their eyebrows",
"CAMERON (impatient) No - he could wrangle with the sister.",
"Michael smiles.",
"Liking the intrigue.",
"MICHAEL What makes you think he'll do it?",
"CAMERON He seems like he thrives on danger",
"MICHAEL No kidding.",
"He's a criminal.",
"I heard he lit a state trooper on fire.",
"He just got out of Alcatraz...",
"CAMERON They always let felons sit in on Honors Biology?",
"MICHAEL I'm serious, man, he's whacked.",
"He sold his own liver on the black market so he could buy new speakers.",
"CAMERON Forget his reputation.",
"Do you think we've got a plan or not?",
"MICHAEL Did she actually say she'd go out with you?",
"CAMERON",
"That's what I just said",
"Michael processes this.",
"MICHAEL You know, if you do go out with Bianca, you'd be set.",
"You'd outrank everyone.",
"Strictly A-list.",
"With me by your side.",
"CAMERON I thought you hated those people.",
"MICHAEL Hey -- I've gotta have a few clients when I get to Wall Street.",
"A cowboy flicks the frog's heart into one of the Coffee Kid's latte.",
"Cameron presses on, over the melee.",
"CAMERON So now all we gotta do is talk to him.",
"He points to Patrick, who now makes his frog hump another frog, with full-on sound effects.",
"MICHAEL I'll let you handle that.",
"INT. WOODSHOP - DAY",
"Boys and a few stray girls nail their pieces of wood",
"Michael sits next to PEPE, a Coffee Kid, who holds out his jacket like the men who sell watches in the subway.",
"Inside several bags of coffee hang from hooks.",
"PEPE Some people like the Colombian, but it all depends on your acidity preference.",
"Me?",
"I prefer East African and Indonesian.",
"You start the day with a Sumatra Boengie or maybe and Ethiopian Sidamo in your cup, you're that much farther ahead than someone drinkin' Cosia Rican or Kona -- you know what I mean?",
"Michael nods solemnly.",
"ACROSS THE ROOM",
"Patrick sits at a table with Scurvy, making something that looks like a machete out of a two-by-four.",
"Cameron approaches, full of good-natured farm boy cheer",
"CAMERON Hey, there",
"In response, Patrick brandishes a loud POWER TOOL in his direction.",
"Cameron slinks away.",
"CAMERON (continuing)",
"Later, then.",
"Michael watches, shaking his head.",
"INT. CAFETERIA - DAY",
"Joey and his pals take turns drawing boobs onto a cafeteria tray with a magic marker.",
"Michael walks up and sits between them, casual as can be",
"MICHAEL Hey.",
"JOEY Are you lost?",
"MICHAEL Nope - just came by to chat",
"JOEY We don't chat.",
"MICHAEL Well, actually, I thought I'd run an idea by you.",
"You know, just to see if you're interested.",
"JOEY We're not.",
"He grabs Michael by the side of the head, and proceeds to draw a penis on his cheek with the magic marker.",
"Michael suffers the indignity and speaks undaunted.",
"MICHAEL (grimacing) Hear me out.",
"You want Bianca don't you?",
"Joey sits back and cackles at his drawing.",
"MICHAEL (continuing)",
"But she can't go out with you because her sister is this insane head case and no one will go out with her.",
"right?",
"JOEY Does this conversation have a purpose?",
"MICHAEL So what you need to do is recruit a guy who'll go out with her.",
"Someone who's up for the job.",
"Michael points to Patrick, who makes a disgusted face at his turkey pot pie before he rises and throws it at the garbage can, rather than in it.",
"JOEY",
"That guy?",
"I heard he ate a live duck once.",
"Everything but the beak and the feet.",
"MICHAEL Exactly",
"Joey turns to look at Michael.",
"JOEY",
"What's in it for you?",
"MICHAEL Oh, hey, nothin' man Purely good will on my part.",
"He rises to leave and turns to the others.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) I have a dick on my face, don't I?",
"INT. BOY'S ROOM - DAY",
"Michael stands at the sink, trying to scrub Joey's artwork off his face as Cameron watches.",
"CAMERON You got him involved?",
"MICHAEL Like we had a choice?",
"Besides -- when you let the enemy think he's orchestrating the battle, you're in a position of power.",
"We let him pretend he's calling the shots, and while he's busy setting up the plan, you have time to woo Bianca.",
"Cameron grins and puts an arm around him",
"CAMERON You're one brilliant guy",
"Michael pulls back, noticing other guys filing in.",
"MICHAEL",
"Hey - I appreciate gratitude as much as the next guy, but it's not gonna do you any good to be known as New Kid Who Embraces Guys In The Bathroom.",
"Cameron pulls back and attempts to posture himself in a manly way for the others, now watching.",
"INT. KENNY'S THAI FOOD DINER - DAY",
"Kat and Mandella pick apart their pad thai.",
"Mandella is smoking.",
"KAT So he has this huge raging fit about Sarah Lawrence and insists that I go to his male-dominated, puking frat boy, number one golf team school.",
"I have no say at all.",
"MANDELLA William would never have gone to a state school.",
"KAT William didn't even go to high school",
"MANDELLA That's never been proven",
"KAT Neither has his heterosexuality.",
"Mandella replies with a look of ice.",
"Kat uses the moment to stub out Mandella's cigarette.",
"KAT (continuing) I appreciate your efforts toward a speedy death, but I'm consuming.",
"(pointing at her food)",
"Do you mind?",
"MANDELLA Does it matter?",
"KAT If I was Bianca, it would be, \"Any school you want, precious.",
"Don't forget your tiara.\"",
"They both look up as Patrick enters.",
"He walks up to the counter to place his order.",
"Mandella leans toward Kat with the glow of fresh gossip",
"MANDELLA Janice Parker told me he was a roadie for Marilyn Manson.",
"Patrick nods at them as he takes his food outside.",
"KAT Janice Parker is an idiot",
"INT. MISS PERKY'S OFFICE - DAY",
"Patrick sits before Miss Perky, eating his Thai food",
"MISS PERKY (looking at chart)",
"I don't understand, Patrick.",
"You haven't done anything asinine this week.",
"Are you not feeling well?",
"PATRICK Touch of the flu.",
"MISS PERKY",
"I'm at a loss, then.",
"What should we talk about?",
"Your year of absence?",
"He smiles his charming smile",
"PATRICK How 'bout your sex life?",
"She tolerates his comment with her withering glance.",
"MISS PERKY",
"Why don't we discuss your driving need to be a hemorrhoid?",
"PATRICK What's to discuss?",
"MISS PERKY",
"You weren't abused, you aren't stupid, and as far as I can tell, you're only slightly psychotic -- so why is it that you're such a fuck-up?",
"PATRICK Well, you know -- there's the prestige of the job title... and the benefits package is pretty good...",
"The bell RINGS.",
"MISS PERKY Fine.",
"Go do something repugnant and give us something to talk about next week.",
"INT. TUTORING ROOM - DAY",
"Several pairs of tutors and students sit at the various desks.",
"Mandella sits with TREVOR, a White Rasta.",
"She attempts to get him to do geometry, but he stares at her, as if smitten",
"MANDELLA Look, it's really easy.",
"TREVOR You're a freedom fighter.",
"Be proud, sister.",
"Mandella sets down her pencil and closes the book.",
"MANDELLA (rotely)",
"It's Mandella with two L's.",
"I am not related to Nelson Mandela.",
"I am not a political figure.",
"I do not live in South Africa.",
"My parents just spent a few too many acid trips thinking they were revolutionaries.",
"TREVOR But you freed our people",
"MANDELLA Your \"people\" are white, suburban high school boys who smoke too much hemp.",
"I have not freed you, Trevor.",
"(grabbing his arm dramatically)",
"Only you can free yourself.",
"ACROSS THE ROOM Bianca and Cameron sit side by side, cozy as can be",
"BIANCA C'esc ma tete.",
"This is my head",
"CAMERON Right.",
"See?",
"You're ready for the quiz.",
"BIANCA I don't want to know how to say that though.",
"I want to know useful things.",
"Like where the good stores are.",
"How much does champagne cost?",
"Stuff like Chat.",
"I have never in my life had to point out my head to someone.",
"CAMERON",
"That's because it's such a nice one.",
"BIANCA Forget French.",
"She shuts her book and puts on a seductive smile",
"BIANCA (continuing) How is our little Find the Wench A Date plan progressing?",
"CAMERON Well, there's someone I think might be --",
"Bianca's eyes light up",
"BIANCA Show me",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Cameron and Bianca lean against the wall -inconspicuously.",
"Bianca plays it cool.",
"BIANCA Give me a sign when he walks by.",
"And don't point.",
"The bell RINGS.",
"Kids flood past.",
"Then Patrick saunters by with Scurvy.",
"Cameron nudges Bianca.",
"CAMERON There.",
"BIANCA Where?",
"Out of desperation, Cameron awkwardly lunges across Patrick's path.",
"Patrick shoves him back against the wall without a thought.",
"Cameron lands in a THUD at Bianca's feet.",
"CAMERON I guess he didn't see me (calling after Patrick) Some other time --",
"Bianca watches Patrick, a wicked gleam in her eye.",
"BIANCA My God, he's repulsive.",
"He's so perfect!",
"INT. GYM CLASS - DAY",
"Several volleyball games are being played.",
"Joey and a member of his hulking entourage, approach Patrick, who still manages to look cool, even in gym clothes.",
"They pull him aside roughly.",
"PATRICK (shrugging them off) What?",
"Joey points",
"JOEY See that girl?",
"Patrick follows his line of vision to Kat as she spikes the ball into some poor cowboy's face.",
"PATRICK",
"Yeah",
"JOEY What do you think?",
"Kat wins the game and high fives the others, who are scared of her.",
"PATRICK Two legs, nice rack...",
"JOEY Yeah, whatever.",
"I want you to go out with her.",
"PATRICK Sure, Sparky.",
"I'll get right on it.",
"JOEY You just said",
"PATRICK You need money to take a girl out",
"JOEY",
"But you'd go out with her if you had the cake?",
"Patrick stares at Joey deadpan.",
"His dislike for the guy obvious.",
"PATRICK (sarcastic)",
"Yeah, I'd take her to Europe if I had the plane.",
"Joey smiles.",
"JOEY You got it, Verona.",
"I pick up the tab, you do the honors.",
"PATRICK You're gonna pay me to take out some girl?",
"JOEY I can't date her sister until that one gets a boyfriend.",
"And that's the catch.",
"She doesn't want a boyfriend.",
"PATRICK How much?",
"JOEY",
"Twenty bucks each time you take her out.",
"PATRICK I can't take a girl like that out on twenty bucks.",
"JOEY Fine, thirty.",
"Patrick raises an eyebrow, urging him up",
"JOEY (continuing) Take it or leave it.",
"This isn't a negotiation.",
"PATRICK Fifty, and you've got your man.",
"Patrick walks away with a smile",
"EXT. FIELD HOCKEY FIELD - DAY",
"Kat and the rest of the team go through a grueling practice session.",
"Kat spares no one as she whips the ball all over the field.",
"Patrick sits on the bleachers nearby, watching.",
"A cigarette dangles from his mouth.",
"His pal, SCURVY is next to him.",
"MR. CHAPIN, the coach, blows the WHISTLE.",
"MR. CHAPIN (proudly) Good run, Stratford.",
"Kat nods in response, and the girls leave the field.",
"Patrick hops down to follow.",
"PATRICK Hey.",
"Girlie.",
"Kat stops and turns slowly to look at him.",
"PATRICK (continuing) I mean Wo-man.",
"How ya doin'?",
"KAT (smiles brightly)",
"Sweating like a pig, actually.",
"And yourself?",
"PATRICK There's a way to get a guy's attention.",
"KAT My mission in life.",
"She stands there undaunted, hand on hip.",
"KAT (continuing) Obviously, I've struck your fancy.",
"So, you see, it worked.",
"The world makes sense again.",
"Patrick's eyes narrow.",
"He steps closer.",
"PATRICK Pick you up Friday, then",
"KAT Oh, right. Friday.",
"PATRICK backs up a little.",
"He uses his most seductive tone",
"PATRICK The night I take you to places you've never been before.",
"And back.",
"KAT Like where?",
"The 7-Eleven on Burnside?",
"Do you even know my name, screwboy?",
"PATRICK I know a lot more than that",
"Kat stares at him.",
"KAT Doubtful.",
"Very doubtful.",
"She walks away quickly, leaving him standing alone.",
"PATRICK (calling after her)",
"You're no bargain either, sweetheart.",
"Scurvy appears at his side",
"SCURVY",
"So I guess the Jeep won't be getting a new Blaupunkt.",
"ACROSS THE FIELD Cameron and Michael watch.",
"MICHAEL He took the bait.",
"STRATFORD HOUSE/BATHROOM - NIGHT",
"Kat washes her face at the sink.",
"Bianca appears behind her, and attempts to twist Kat's hair into a chignon.",
"She wacks Bianca away.",
"BIANCA Have you ever considered a new look?",
"I mean, seriously, you could have some potential buried under all this hostility.",
"Kat pushes past her into the hallway.",
"KAT I have the potential to smack the crap out of you if you don't get out of my way.",
"BIANCA Can you at least start wearing a bra?",
"Kat SLAMS her door in response.",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Patrick, Scurvy and some other randoms head for the exit",
"SCURVY You up for a burger?",
"Patrick looks in his wallet.",
"It's empty.",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Kat stands at her locker, gathering her books.",
"Patrick appears at her side, smiling.",
"PATRICK Hey",
"Kat doesn't answer",
"PATRICK (continuing)",
"You hate me don't you?",
"KAT I don't really think you warrant that strong an emotion.",
"PATRICK Then say you'll spend Dollar Night at the track with me.",
"KAT And why would I do that?",
"PATRICK Come on -- the ponies, the flat beer, you with money in your eyes, me with my hand on your ass...",
"KAT You -- covered in my vomit.",
"PATRICK Seven-thirty?",
"She slams her locker shut and walks away",
"EXT. DOWNTOWN STREET - NIGHT",
"Kat emerges from a music store carrying a bag of CDs in her teeth, and fumbling through her purse with both hands.",
"She finds her keys and pulls them out with a triumphant tug.",
"She looks up and finds Patrick sitting on the hood of her car",
"PATRICK Nice ride.",
"Vintage fenders.",
"Kat takes the bag out of her mouth.",
"KAT Are you following me?",
"PATRICK I was in the laundromat.",
"I saw your car.",
"Thought I'd say hi.",
"KAT Hi",
"She gets in and starts the car.",
"PATRICK You're not a big talker, are you?",
"KAT Depends on the topic.",
"My fenders don't really whip me into a verbal frenzy.",
"She starts to pull out, and is blocked by Joey's Viper, which pulls up perpendicular to her rear and parks.",
"Joey and his groupies emerge and head for the liquor store",
"KAT (continuing) Hey -- do you mind?",
"JOEY Not at all",
"They continue on into the store.",
"Kat stares at them in disbelief...",
"Then BACKS UP",
"Her vintage fenders CRASH into the door of Joey's precious Viper.",
"Patrick watches with a delighted grin Joey races out of the liquor store.",
"JOEY (continuing) You fucking bitch!",
"Kat pulls forward and backs into his car again. Smiling sweetly.",
"INT. STRATFORD HOUSE - NIGHT",
"Walter paces as Kat sits calmly on the couch.",
"WALTER My insurance does not cover PMS",
"KAT Then tell them I had a seizure.",
"WALTER Is this about Sarah Lawrence?",
"You punishing me?",
"KAT I thought you were punishing me.",
"WALTER Why can't we agree on this?",
"KAT Because you're making decisions for me.",
"WALTER As a parent, that's my right",
"KAT So what I want doesn't matter?",
"WALTER You're eighteen.",
"You don't know what you want.",
"You won't know until you're forty-five and you don't have it.",
"KAT (emphatic) I want to go to an East Coast school!",
"I want you to trust me to make my own choices.",
"I want --",
"Walter's BEEPER goes off",
"WALTER Christ!",
"I want a night to go by that I'm not staring a contraction in the face.",
"He walks out, leaving Kat stewing on the couch.",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Patrick shuts his graffiti-encrusted locker, revealing Joey's angry visage, glowering next to him.",
"JOEY When I shell out fifty, I expect results.",
"PATRICK I'm on it",
"JOEY Watching the bitch trash my car doesn't count as a date.",
"PATRICK I got her under control.",
"She just acts crazed in public to keep up the image.",
"Joey sees through the bluff",
"JOEY Let me put it to you this way, if you don't get any action, I don't get any action.",
"So get your ass on hers by the end of the week.",
"Joey starts to walk off",
"PATRICK I just upped my price",
"JOEY (turning) What?",
"PATRICK A hundred bucks a date.",
"JOEY Forget it.",
"PATRICK Forget her sister, then.",
"Joey thinks for a frustrated moment, PUNCHES the locker, then peels another fifty out of his wallet with a menacing scowl.",
"JOEY You better hope you're as smooth as you think you are, Verona.",
"Patrick takes the money with a smile.",
"INT.",
"TUTORING ROOM - DAY Cameron runs a sentence past Bianca.",
"CAMERON La copine et I 'ami? La diferance?",
"Bianca glares at him.",
"BIANCA A \"copine\" is someone you can count on.",
"An \"ami\" is someone who makes promises he can't keep.",
"Cameron closes the French book",
"CAMERON You got something on your mind?",
"BIANCA I counted on you to help my cause.",
"You and that thug are obviously failing.",
"Aren't we ever going on our date?",
"He melts",
"CAMERON You have my word.",
"As a gentleman",
"BIANCA You're sweet.",
"She touches his hand.",
"He blushes at her praise and watches her toss her hair back",
"CAMERON (appreciative) How do you get your hair to look like that?",
"BIANCA Eber's Deep Conditioner every two days.",
"And I never, ever use a blowdryer without the diffuser attachment.",
"Cameron nods with interest.",
"CAMERON You know, I read an article about that.",
"Bianca looks surprised.",
"BIANCA You did?",
"INT. BOY'S ROOM - DAY",
"Patrick stands at the sink, washing his hands Michael and Cameron cower in the corner, watching him.",
"PATRICK (without turning around) Say it",
"MICHAEL (clearing his throat) What?",
"PATRICK",
"Whatever the hell it is you're standin' there waitin' to say.",
"Cameron bravely steps forward",
"CAMERON We wanted to talk to you about the plan.",
"Patrick turns toward them.",
"PATRICK What plan?",
"MICHAEL The situation is, my man Cameron here has a major jones for Bianca Stratford.",
"PATRICK What is it with this chick?",
"She have three tits?",
"Cameron starts to object, but Michael holds up a hand.",
"MICHAEL I think I speak correctly when I say that Cameron's love is pure.",
"Purer than say -- Joey Dorsey's.",
"PATRICK Dorsey can plow whoever he wants.",
"I'm just in this for the cash.",
"Cameron starts choking at the thought of Joey plowing his beloved Bianca.",
"MICHAEL That's where we can help you.",
"With Kat.",
"PATRICK So Dorsey can get the girl?",
"MICHAEL Patrick, Pat, you're not looking at the big picture.",
"Joey's just a pawn.",
"We set this whole thing up so Cameron can get the girl.",
"Patrick smiles.",
"He likes the idea of Joey being a pawn in this game.",
"PATRICK You two are gonna help me tame the wild beast?",
"MICHAEL (grinning)",
"We're your guys.",
"CAMERON",
"And he means that strictly in a nonprison-movie type of way.",
"PATRICK",
"Yeah -- we'll see.",
"He swings the door open and exits, leaving Michael and Cameron grinning at each other.",
"MICHAEL We're in.",
"INT. CLASSROOM - DAY",
"CU on a party invitation as it gets handed out.",
"\"Future Princeton Grad Bogey Lowenstein proudly presents a Saturday night bash at his abode.",
"Casual attire\".",
"Michael holds the invitation up to Cameron.",
"CAMERON This is it.",
"A golden opportunity.",
"Patrick can ask Katarina to the party.",
"MICHAEL In that case, we'll need to make it a school-wide blow out.",
"CAMERON Will Bogey get bent?",
"MICHAEL Are you kidding?",
"He'll piss himself with joy.",
"He's the ultimate kiss ass.",
"CAFETERIA - DAY",
"Michael hands a jock the party invite as they pass each other at the trash cans.",
"INT. GYM CLASS - DAY",
"The jock calls a fellow jock",
"INT. MATH CLASS - DAY",
"Jock whispers to a cheerleader",
"COURTYARD - DAY",
"The cheerleader calls a White Rasta that she's making out with, showing him the invite.",
"TRACK - DAY",
"The White Rasta tells a cowboy as they run laps during track practice.",
"INT. SHOWERS - DAY",
"The cowboy Cells a Coffee Kid, as he shields his java from the spray of the shower.",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Joey stands ac his open locker with Bianca.",
"The locker is an homage to Joey's \"modeling\" career.",
"Cheesy PRINT ADS of him -- running in a field of daisies, petting a kitten, etc. -- adorn the locker door.",
"JOEY Which do you like better?",
"INSERT - HEADSHOTS of Joey.",
"In one, he's pouting in a white shirt.",
"In the other, he's pouting in a black shirt.",
"BIANCA I think I like the white shirt",
"Joey nods thoughtfully.",
"JOEY It's more",
"BIANCA Expensive?",
"JOEY Exactly (beat)",
"So, you going to Bogey Lowenbrau's thing on Saturday?",
"BIANCA Hopefully.",
"He gives her his best flirtatious smile",
"JOEY Good, 'cause I'm not gonna bother if you won't be there.",
"He taps her on the nose and she giggles",
"INT.",
"TUTORING ROOM Bianca sits across from Cameron, who's transfixed, as always",
"BIANCA Have you heard about Bogey Lowenstein's party?",
"CAMERON Sure have.",
"BIANCA (pouting) I really, really, really wanna go, but I can't.",
"Not unless my sister goes.",
"CAMERON I'm workin' on it.",
"But she doesn't seem to be goin' for him.",
"He fishes.",
"CAMERON (continuing)",
"She's not a...",
"BIANCA Lesbian?",
"No.",
"I found a picture of Jared Leto in one of her drawers, so I'm pretty sure she's not harboring same-sex tendencies.",
"CAMERON",
"So that's the kind of guy she likes?",
"Pretty ones?",
"BIANCA Who knows?",
"All I've ever heard her say is that she'd dip before dating a guy that smokes.",
"Cameron furiously takes notes",
"CAMERON All right.",
"What else is she partial to?",
"INT.",
"DIVE BAR - NIGHT Patrick plays pool with some random deviant cronies.",
"He looks up when he hears a COMMOTION at the door.",
"LOU the bouncer is in the midst of throwing Michael and Cameron out.",
"PATRICK Lou, it's okay.",
"They're with me.",
"Lou looks at Patrick, surprised, then reluctantly lets our two non-deviants pass through.",
"Patrick guides them to a table and sips from a beer.",
"PATRICK (continuing)",
"What've you got for me?",
"CAMERON I've retrieved certain pieces of information on Miss Katarina Stratford I think you'll find helpful.",
"Cameron pulls out a piece of paper.",
"MICHAEL (to Patrick)",
"One question before we start -- should you be drinking alcohol when you don't have a liver?",
"PATRICK What?!",
"MICHAEL Good enough.",
"Cameron looks up at Patrick.",
"CAMERON Number one.",
"She hates smokers",
"MICHAEL It's a lung cancer issue",
"CAMERON Her favorite uncle",
"MICHAEL Dead at forty-one.",
"Patrick sits up",
"PATRICK Are you telling me I'm a - (spits the word out) \"non-smoker\"?",
"MICHAEL Just for now.",
"CAMERON Another thing.",
"Bianca said that Kat likes -- pretty guys.",
"This is met with silence.",
"Then:",
"PATRICK What?",
"You don't think I'm pretty?",
"Michael smacks Cameron",
"MICHAEL He's pretty!",
"CAMERON Okay!",
"I wasn't sure",
"Cameron goes back to the list.",
"CAMERON (continuing)",
"Okay -- Likes: Thai food, feminist prose, and \"angry, stinky girl music of the indie-rock persuasion\".",
"PATRICK So what does that give me?",
"I'm supposed to buy her some noodles and a book and sit around listening to chicks who can't play their instruments?",
"MICHAEL Ever been to Club Skunk?",
"PATRICK Yeah.",
"CAMERON Gigglepuss is playing there tomorrow night.",
"PATRICK Don't make me do it, man",
"MICHAEL Assail your ears for one night.",
"CAMERON",
"It's her favorite band.",
"Patrick groans",
"MICHAEL I also retrieved a list of her most recent CD purchases, courtesy of American Express.",
"He hands it over.",
"PATRICK (smiling)",
"Michael -- did you get this information \"illegally\"?",
"Michael puts a finger to his lips.",
"MICHAEL I prefer to think of it simply as an alternative to what the law allows.",
"PATRICK I'm likin' you guys better",
"He looks down at the list of CDs.",
"PATRICK (continuing)",
"This is really music?",
"INT. KAT'S ROOM - NIGHT",
"MUSIC BLARES in a room with minimalist decor splashed with indie rock band posters and flyers.",
"Kat and Mandella dance as they dress and apply make-up Bianca enters, interrupting their fun.",
"BIANCA Can you turn down the Screaming Menstrual Bitches?",
"I'm trying to study.",
"Kat doesn't move, so Bianca crosses to the stereo, turning down the volume.",
"BIANCA (continuing) Don't tell me you're actually going out?",
"On a school night, no less.",
"Kat shoots her a glare",
"BIANCA (continuing; excited)",
"Oh my God, does this mean you're becoming normal?",
"KAT It means that Gigglepuss is playing at Club Skunk and we're going.",
"BIANCA (disappointed)",
"Oh, I thought you might have a date (beat)",
"I don't know why I'm bothering to ask, but are you going to Bogey Lowenstein's party Saturday night?",
"KAT What do you think?",
"BIANCA I think you're a freak.",
"I think you do this to torture me.",
"And I think you suck.",
"She smiles sweetly and shuts the door behind her.",
"Kat doesn't bat an eye.",
"She grabs her purse and opens the door",
"KAT Let's hit it.",
"EXT. CLUB SKUNK - NIGHT",
"A happy black and white neon skunk sprays fine mist on the line of kids below.",
"INT. CLUB FOYER - NIGHT",
"Kat and Mandella walk in, Mandella nervously pulling out her fake ID.",
"The giant, afroed bouncer, BRUCE, looks typically mono-syllabic.",
"MANDELLA (whispering to Kat) You think this'll work?",
"KAT No fear.",
"They approach Bruce.",
"Kat puts on her happy, shiny face",
"KAT (continuing) Hello!",
"We'd like two for Gigglepuss!",
"Bruce looks the girls up and down.",
"BRUCE I can count.",
"He looks at their IDs.",
"Mandella gently moves Kat aside, wearing a face that could only be described as \"I AM a Victoria's Secret model.\"",
"MANDELLA I'll bet you can..",
"She sticks out her chest and licks her lips.",
"Bruce stares at her deadpan and hands her back the IDs.",
"BRUCE Go ahead.",
"(to Mandella)",
"And you",
"MANDELLA (all come hither)",
"Yes?",
"BRUCE Take it easy on the guys in there.",
"Mandella winks at him and sashays inside Kat: follows behind, shaking her head.",
"EXT. CLUB SKUNK - NIGHT",
"Patrick's mail truck clatters to a stop out front.",
"INT. CLUB FOYER - NIGHT",
"Patrick walks up to Bruce, who's frisking a badly mowhawked PIERCED EYEBROW BOY.",
"Bruce pulls a SWITCHBLADE out of the boy's inside pocket.",
"BRUCE Next time, leave the Bic at home, Skippy.",
"SKIPPY It's a bottle opener.",
"Bruce pushes him inside the club, then sees Patrick.",
"BRUCE Verona, my man.",
"They shake.",
"PATRICK Always a pleasure, Brucie.",
"BRUCE Didn't have you pegged for a Gigglepuss fan.",
"Aren't they a little too pre-teen belly-button ring for you?",
"PATRICK Fan of a fan.",
"You see a couple of minors come in?",
"BRUCE",
"Never",
"PATRICK Padua girls.",
"One tall, decent body.",
"The other one kinda short and undersexed?",
"BRUCE Just sent 'em through.",
"Patrick starts to go in",
"BRUCE (continuing)",
"Hey -- what happened to that chick you brought last time?",
"The one with the snake?",
"Patrick laughs and goes into the club",
"INT. CLUB - NIGHT",
"Onstage, the all-female band GIGGLEPUSS is parlaying their bad girl sass into a ripping punk number.",
"Near the stage is a joyful mass of pogo-ing teens AT THE BAR",
"Patrick bellies up and looks around the club.",
"Gigglepuss finishes a song.",
"LEAD SINGER Hello, out there.",
"We're Gigglepuss and we're from Olympia.",
"A teenage boy in the audience takes the opportunity to scream.",
"BOY (0.S.) Pet my kitty!",
"LEAD SINGER Meow",
"They rev into their next song.",
"NEAR THE STAGE",
"Mandella and Kat glow with sweat.",
"When they hear the opening chords of the song, they look at each other and scream with glee as they begin to dance.",
"They couldn't be having a better time.",
"AT THE BAR",
"Patrick signals to get the bartender's attention and looks across the bouncing surge of the crowd.",
"He spots Kat and Mandella singing along.",
"HIS POV",
"The gleeful Kat -- dancing and looking completely at ease.",
"None of her usual \"attitude\".",
"Patrick is transfixed.",
"And most definitely attracted.",
"NEAR THE STAGE Kat looks at Mandella.",
"KAT (shouting) I need agua!",
"She makes her way through the crowd to the bar.",
"AT THE BAR",
"She made it.",
"She signals for the bartender and as she's waiting, looks around.",
"She spots Patrick a few feet away",
"KAT (continuing to herself)",
"Shit",
"She sneaks a glance.",
"He's staring, but this time he looks away before she can.",
"Despite herself, she's miffed.",
"The bartender arrives",
"BARTENDER (shouting)",
"What can I get you?",
"KAT Two waters.",
"She looks at Patrick again.",
"He's completely absorbed in the band.",
"She scowls.",
"The bottled water arrives and she marches off, forgetting to pay.",
"She walks up to Patrick.",
"KAT (continuing)",
"You're not fooling anyone.",
"Patrick looks at her, surprised",
"PATRICK (yelling) hey.",
"Great show, huh?",
"KAT (yelling)",
"If you're planning on asking me out you might as well get it over with.",
"PATRICK (yelling)",
"Excuse me?",
"KAT (yelling)",
"That's what you want, isn't it?",
"PATRICK (yelling; gesturing toward the band) Do you mind?",
"You're sort of ruining it for me.",
"Kat steams.",
"And watches him watch the band",
"KAT (yelling)",
"You're not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke.",
"The band takes a break, so they can stop yelling now",
"PATRICK I know.",
"I quit.",
"He leans back, making no attempt to hit on her.",
"She moves closer.",
"KAT Oh, really?",
"He motions toward the stage",
"PATRICK You know, these guys are no Bikini Kill or The Raincoats, but they're right up there.",
"KAT You know who The Raincoats are?",
"PATRICK Why, don't you?",
"She's completely taken aback.",
"He uses the moment to his advantage and brushes her hair back as he speaks right into her ear.",
"PATRICK (continuing) I watched you out there I've never seen you look like that",
"Kat steps away, brushing the hair back that he just touched Her cheeks pinken.",
"His cocky side is back in a flash",
"PATRICK (continuing) Come to that party with me.",
"At that moment, the band starts another SONG",
"KAT (yelling)",
"What?",
"The bartender approaches.",
"BARTENDER (to Kat, yelling)",
"You forgot to pay!",
"PATRICK (yelling)",
"I got it, Rick.",
"He tosses some bills on the bar",
"Rather than thank him, Kat simply watches him, trying to figure out his motive.",
"PATRICK (continuing; yelling)",
"Nine-thirty then.",
"A few people have gotten between them at the bar and she can't hear a word he's saying.",
"She gives him one last look and heads back into the crowd.",
"Patrick smiles.",
"She didn't say no this time.",
"EXT. CLUB SKUNK - NIGHT",
"The crowd files out of the club, Kat and Mandella amongst them.",
"A^ they're walking toward the parking lot, Patrick coasts by in his truck.",
"The gears GRIND.",
"He yells out the window.",
"MANDELLA What'd he say?",
"KAT Who cares?",
"Mandella watches Kat as she stares after Patrick",
"MANDELLA Has he importun'd you with love in honourable fashion?",
"Kat glances sharply at her.",
"MANDELLA (continuing; off her look) Don't be Cruella with me.",
"I'm in favor of romance.",
"You're the one that wants to march on Washington every five minutes.",
"Kat pokes her, then looks back at the club dreamily.",
"KAT Gigglepuss was so beyond.",
"Mandella nods.",
"MANDELLA They were.",
"I only wish William could have been here to witness the rebirth of punk rock with us.",
"Kat links her arm through Mandella's and they head for the car.",
"KAT So true.",
"INT.",
"HALLWAY - DAY Cameron and Michael are at Michael's locker.",
"CAMERON So, then she says that she almost didn't wear the Kenneth Coles with that dress because she thought she was mixing, you know, genres.",
"And the fact that I noticed -- and I'm quoting here - \"really meant something.\"",
"Cameron looks At Michael expectantly",
"MICHAEL You told me that part already.",
"CAMERON Hell, I've just been going over the whole thing in my head and -",
"Joey appears over Cameron's shoulder.",
"JOEY Hey.",
"Dingo Boingo",
"Cameron and Michael look at each other And turn around slowly",
"JOEY (continuing; to Michael)",
"I hear you're helpin' Verona.",
"MICHAEL Uh, yeah.",
"We're old friend*",
"JOEY You and Verona?",
"MICHAEL What?",
"We took bathes together when we were kids.",
"It's incredibly obvious that he's lying.",
"Joey eyes him then turns to Cameron.",
"JOEY What's your gig in all this?",
"CAMERON I'm just the new guy.",
"Joey turns back to Michael, grabbing the alligator on his shirt and twisting it.",
"JOEY You better not fuck this up.",
"I'm heavily invested.",
"MICHAEL Hey -- it's all for the higher good right?",
"Joey lets go of Michael and SHOVES Cameron against a locker for good measure, as he walks away-",
"CAMERON Is it about me?",
"EXT. MISS PERKY'S OFFICE - DAY",
"Kat sits outside waiting for her appointment, bored and annoyed.",
"The door opens and Miss Perky escorts Patrick out",
"MISS PERKY",
"You're completely demented.",
"PATRICK (cheery) See you next week!",
"Kat stands and Patrick sees her.",
"Miss Perky watches in horror",
"MISS PERKY",
"You two know each other?",
"PATRICK/KAT Yeah/No.",
"Miss Perky grabs Kat and shoves her into her office.",
"MISS PERKY (to Patrick)",
"Dear God, stay away from her.",
"If you two ever decided to breed, evil would truly walk the earth.",
"Patrick gives Kat one last look before the door shuts, then smiles-",
"EXT. STRATFORD HOUSE - NIGHT",
"The lights are on, illuminating the yard",
"INT. STRATFORD HOUSE/UPSTAIRS HALLWAY - NIGHT",
"Bianca and Chastity stand outside Kat's room.",
"MUSIC is blaring and the door is shut.",
"Bianca looks at her watch",
"BIANCA",
"She's obviously not going.",
"INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT",
"Across the carpet, two pairs of teenage girl feet sneak past.",
"Bianca and Chastity, teddy bear purses in hand.",
"FROM THE KITCHEN A RUSTLING is heard.",
"The girls freeze.",
"Walter emerges from the kitchen with a mile-high sandwich The girls are like statues.",
"Walter jumps.",
"BIANCA Daddy, I --",
"WALTER And where're you going?",
"BIANCA If you must know, we were attempting to go to a small study group of friends.",
"WALTER Otherwise known as an orgy?",
"BIANCA",
"It's just a party.",
"Daddy, but I knew you'd forbid me to go since \"Gloria Steinem\" over there isn't going --",
"She points to Kat -- Walkman blaring -- who comes downstairs, wearing a baby tee and battered Levis.",
"Her relaxing-at-home look is about 400 times sexier than her atschool look.",
"She wanders toward the kitchen.",
"Walter directs his attention toward Kat.",
"WALTER Do you know about any party?",
"Katarina?",
"Kat shrugs as she comes back out of the kitchen with an apple",
"BIANCA Daddy, people expect me to be there!",
"WALTER",
"If Kat's not going, you're not going.",
"Bianca turns to Kat, eyes ablaze",
"BIANCA You're ruining my life' Because you won't be normal, I can't be normal.",
"KAT What's normal?",
"BIANCA Bogey Lowenstein's party is normal, but you're too busy listening to Bitches Who Need Prozac to know that.",
"WALTER What's a Bogey Lowenstein?",
"Kat takes off her earphones, ready to do battle",
"BIANCA Can't you forget for just one night that you're completely wretched?",
"KAT At least I'm not a clouted fensucked hedge-pig.",
"Bianca tosses her hair.",
"BIANCA Like I'm supposed to know what that even means.",
"KAT It's Shakespeare.",
"Maybe you've heard of him?",
"BIANCA",
"Yeah, he's your freak friend Mandella's boyfriend.",
"I guess since I'm not allowed to go out, I should obsess over a dead guy, too.",
"WALTER Girls",
"Kat stares Bianca down",
"KAT I know about the goddamn party.",
"I'm going.",
"Bianca and Chastity look at each other, thrilled, and burst into gleeful screams.",
"A startled Walter clutches Bianca in a protective hug.",
"WALTER Oh, God.",
"It's starting.",
"BIANCA",
"It's just a party.",
"Daddy.",
"Walter looks dazed.",
"WALTER Wear the belly before you go.",
"BIANCA Daddy, no!",
"WALTER Just for a minute",
"He rushes to a cupboard and pulls out a padded fauxpregnancy belly.",
"WALTER (continuing) I want you to realize the weight of your decisions.",
"He hangs the belly on her as she stands mortified.",
"BIANCA You are so completely unbalanced.",
"KAT Can we go now?",
"Scanned by http://freemoviescripts.com Formatting by http://simplyscripts.home.att.net",
"WALTER (to Bianca) Promise me you won't talk to any boys unless your sister is present.",
"BIANCA Why?",
"WALTER Because she'll scare them away.",
"Kat stomps to the door, grabbing her car keys off the hall table and a sweater from the coat rack.",
"She flings open the door and...",
"There stands Patrick.",
"PATRICK Nine-thirty right?",
"Kat's in shock",
"PATRICK (continuing)",
"I'm early.",
"She holds up her keys",
"KAT I'm driving.",
"He peeks in behind her.",
"PATRICK Who knocked up your sister?",
"INT. BOGEY LOWENSTEIN'S HOUSE - NIGHT",
"BOGEY, a short Future MBA in a tux, greets his guests like a pro, handing out cigars and martinis.",
"BOGEY Nice to see you.",
"Martini bar to the right, shots in the kitchen.",
"The house is filled to capacity with Padua High's finest Kat pushes through the crowd.",
"Patrick saunters in behind her",
"INT. BOGEY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT",
"Joey lines up a row of shots amid much whooping and hollering within the jock crowd.",
"Kat enters, then quickly tries to make an about face.",
"Joey sees her and rushes over to block her, standing in the doorway.",
"JOEY Lookin' fresh tonight, Pussy-Kat",
"Kat gives him a death look and then stops and points at his forehead.",
"KAT Wait -- was that?-- Did your hairline just recede?",
"He panics, whipping out a handy pocket mirror",
"She's already walking away.",
"JOEY Where ya goin?",
"KAT Away.",
"JOEY Your sister here?",
"Kat's face shows utter hatred",
"KAT Leave my sister alone.",
"JOEY (smirking)",
"And why would I do that?",
"A RUCKUS sounds from the next room",
"JOCK A fight!",
"The other jocks rush to watch as two Coffee Kids splash their cupfuls on each other.",
"COFFEE KID #1 That was a New Guinea Peaberry, you Folger's-crystals-slurping-buttwipe.",
"Caffeinated fists fly.",
"Joey slithers away from the door to watch, giving Kat one last smirk, just as Bianca walks into the kitchen.",
"JOEY Just who I was looking for.",
"He puts his arm around Bianca and escorts her out",
"KAT BIANCA",
"Bianca keeps walking, ignoring Kat",
"A GUY pouring shots hands Kat one She downs it and accepts another.",
"GUY Drink up, sister.",
"Patrick walks up",
"PATRICK What's this?",
"KAT (mocking) \"I'm getting trashed, man.\"",
"Isn't that what you're supposed to do at a party?",
"PATRICK I say, do what you wanna do.",
"KAT Funny, you're the only one",
"She downs another.",
"INT. BOGEY'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT",
"Cameron and Michael enter.",
"Cameron looks, around for his beloved, while Michael schmoozee with all in attendance and dishes dirt simultaneously.",
"MICHAEL (high-fiving a jock) Moose, my man!",
"(to Cameron)",
"Ranked fifth in the state.",
"Recruiters have already started calling.",
"Cameron nods intently",
"MICHAEL (continuing; grabbing his belt)",
"Yo, Clem.",
"(to Cameron)",
"A Patsy Cline fan, but hates the new Leanne Rimes.",
"(with a Jamaican swagger) Ziggy, peace, bra.",
"(to Cameron) Prefers a water pipe, but has been known to use a bong.",
"Michael spots Bianca and Chastity, watching the skirmish, and points Cameron's body in her direction.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) Follow the love, man",
"ON BIANCA AND CHASTITY Bianca cranes her neck",
"BIANCA Where did he go?",
"He was just here.",
"CHASTITY Who?",
"BIANCA Joey.",
"Cameron walks over.",
"CAMERON Evening, ladies.",
"Bianca turns and graces him with a pained smile.",
"BIANCA Hi.",
"CAMERON Looks like things worked out tonight, huh?",
"Bianca ignores the question and tries to pawn him off",
"BIANCA You know Chastity?",
"CAMERON I believe we share an art instructor",
"CHASTITY Great",
"BIANCA Would you mind getting me a drink, Cameron?",
"CAMERON Certainly Pabst?",
"Old Milwaukee?",
"RaiJieer?",
"Bianca gives him a tense smile.",
"BIANCA Surprise me.",
"He heads for the kitchen.",
"Joey walks up and grabs her around the waist.",
"She giggles as he picks her up and carries her off -- just as Cameron returns, a beer -- complete with a napkin and straw -- in his hand.",
"Chastity glares with a jealous fury after Bianca and Joey, then gives Cameron the once-over and walks away.",
"Michael appears.",
"MICHAEL Extremely unfortunate maneuver.",
"CAMERON The hell is that?",
"What kind of 'guy just picks up a girl and carries her away while you're talking to her?",
"MICHAEL Buttholus extremus.",
"But hey, you're making progress.",
"CAMERON No, I ' m not.",
"He smacks himself in the head",
"CAMERON (continuing)",
"She used me!",
"She wants to go out with Dorsey.",
"Not me.",
"I'm an idiot!",
"Michael pats him on the shoulder.",
"MICHAEL At least you're self-aware",
"BOGEY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT",
"Kat and a crowd of White Rastas and Cowboys stand in a drunken group hug singing \"I Shot the Sheriff\".",
"Kat has another shot glass in hand.",
"Patrick is showing a scar to an inebriated, enraptured cheerleader.",
"He looks up at Kat and smiles meets his eyes then looks away.",
"INT. BOGEY'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT",
"Bianca stands next to Joey, sipping from her beer",
"JOEY",
"So",
"yeah,",
"I've got the Sears catalog thing going -- and the tube sock gig \" that's gonna be huge.",
"And then I'm up for an ad for Queen Harry next week.",
"BIANCA Queen Harry?",
"JOEY It's a gay cruise line, but I'll be, like, wearing a uniform and stuff.",
"Bianca tries to appear impressed, but it's getting difficult.",
"BIANCA Neat...",
"JOEY My agent says I've got a good shot at being the Prada guy next year.",
"He looks over her shoulder and waves at someone.",
"Bianca takes the opportunity to escape.",
"BIANCA I'll be right back.",
"INT. BOGEY'S BATHROOM - NIGHT",
"Bianca shuts the door and leans on it with a sigh.",
"Chastity applies lip-gloss in the mirror.",
"BIANCA He practically proposed when he found out we had the same dermatologist.",
"I mean.",
"Dr. Bonchowski is great an all, but he's not exactly relevant party conversation.",
"CHASTITY Is he oily or dry?",
"BIANCA Combination.",
"I don't know -- I thought he'd be different.",
"More of a gentleman...",
"Chastity rolls her eyes",
"CHASTITY Bianca, I don't think the highlights of dating Joey Dorsey are going to include door-opening and coat-holding.",
"BIANCA Sometimes I wonder if the guys we're supposed to want to go out with are the ones we actually want to go out with, you know?",
"CHASTITY All I know is -- I'd give up my private line to go out with a guy like Joey.",
"There's a KNOCK at the door.",
"Bianca opens it to find a very drunken Kat.",
"KAT Bianca, I need to talk to you -- I need to tell you --",
"BIANCA (cutting her off) I really don't think I need any social advice from you right now.",
"Bianca grabs Chastity's arm and they exit",
"INT. BOGEY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT - LATER",
"Patrick tries to remove a shot glass from Kat's hand.",
"PATRICK",
"Maybe you should let me have it.",
"Kat is fierce in her refusal to let go",
"KAT I want another one",
"Joey enters, grabbing Patrick by the shoulder, distracting him from his task.",
"JOEY My man",
"As Patrick turns, Kat breaks free and dives into the sea of dancing people in the dining room.",
"PATRICK (annoyed)",
"It's about time.",
"JOEY A deal's a deal.",
"He peels off some bills",
"JOEY (continuing) How'd you do it?",
"PATRICK Do what?",
"JOEY Get her to act like a human",
"A very drunken Kat jumps up onto the kitchen island and starts dancing by herself.",
"She lets loose, hair flying.",
"She's almost burlesque.",
"Others form a crowd, clapping and cheering her on",
"She swings her head around BANGING it on a copper pot hanging from the rack above the center island.",
"She starts to sway, then goes down as Patrick rushes over to catch her.",
"The others CLAP, thinking this is a wonderful finale.",
"Patrick sets her down on her feet, holding her up",
"PATRICK Okay?",
"KAT I'm fine.",
"I'm",
"She tries to push him away, but staggers when she does grabs her again, bracing her.",
"PATRICK You're not okay.",
"KAT I just need to lie down for awhile",
"PATRICK Uh, uh.",
"You lie down and you'll go to sleep",
"KAT I know, just let me sleep",
"PATRICK What if you have a concussion?",
"My dog went to sleep with a concussion and woke up a vegetable.",
"Not that I could tell the difference...",
"She tries to sit on the floor",
"KAT Okay, I'll just sleep but stay awake, okay?",
"He pulls her back to her",
"PATRICK C'mon, let's walk",
"INT. BOGEY'S DINING ROOM - NIGHT",
"As Patrick walks Kat through the dining room, Cameron grabs his arm.",
"CAMERON We need to talk.",
"PATRICK Cameron, I'm a little busy",
"CAMERON",
"It's off.",
"The whole thing.",
"Kat slides down to the floor and Patrick struggles to get h back on her feet.",
"PATRICK What 're you talking about?",
"CAMERON She's partial to Joey, not me",
"Patrick doesn't have time for this.",
"PATRICK Cameron -- do you like the girl?",
"CAMERON Sure",
"PATRICK (impatient) Then, go get her",
"Patrick continues walking an oblivious Kat outside.",
"Cameron stands there, unsure how to make use of this advice",
"EXT. BOGEY LOWENSTEIN'S HOUSE - NIGHT",
"Patrick marches Kat around the yard, holding her up",
"KAT This is so patronizing.",
"PATRICK Leave it to you to use big words when you're shitfaced.",
"KAT Why 're you doing this?",
"PATRICK I told you",
"KAT You don't care if I die",
"PATRICK Sure, I do",
"KAT Why?",
"PATRICK Because then I'd have to start taking out girls who like me.",
"KAT Like you could find one",
"PATRICK See that?",
"Who needs affection when I've got blind hatred?",
"KAT Just let me sit down.",
"He walks her over to the swingset and plops her down in a swing, moving her hands to hang onto the chains.",
"PATRICK How's that?",
"She sits and looks at him for a moment with a smile.",
"Then FALLS over backward.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Jesus.",
"You're like a weeble",
"Patrick rushes to right her, then starts pushing her on the swing to keep her entertained.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Why'd you let him get to you?",
"KAT Who?",
"PATRICK Dorsey.",
"KAT I hate him.",
"PATRICK I know.",
"It'd have to be a pretty big deal to get you to mainline tequila.",
"You don't seem like the type.",
"KAT (holding up a drunken head)",
"Hey man. . .",
"You don ' t think I can be \"cool\"?",
"You don't think I can be \"laid back\" like everyone else?",
"PATRICK (slightly sarcastic) I thought you were above all that",
"KAT You know what they say",
"He stops the swing",
"PATRICK No.",
"What do they say?",
"Kat is asleep, her head resting against the swing's chains.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Shit!",
"He drags her to her feet and starts singing loudly.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Jingle Bells!",
"Jingle Belles!",
"Wake up damn it!",
"He sits her down on the slide and shakes her like a rag doll.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Kat!",
"Wake up!",
"KAT (waking) What?",
"He sighs with relief.",
"PATRICK I thought you were...",
"They share some meaningful eye contact.",
"And then she PUKES on his shoes.",
"INT. BOGEY'S BATHROOM - NIGHT",
"Kat washes her face and grabs a bottle of Scope, taking a big swig.",
"A KNOCK sounds at the door",
"KAT Go away",
"Bianca opens the door and looks at her sister with the smuggest of all possible grins.",
"BIANCA Dinner taste better on the way out?",
"Gives her a \"don't even start\" look.",
"BIANCA (continuing) I don't get you.",
"You act like you're too good for any of this, and then you go totally apeshit when you get here.",
"KAT You're welcome.",
"She pushes past her and leaves the bathroom.",
"KAT'S CAR - NIGHT",
"Kat's in the driver's seat.",
"Patrick leans in and takes the keys out of the ignition.",
"PATRICK Cute",
"BOGEY LOWENSTEIN'S HOUSE - NIGHT",
"Kids loiter on the lawn.",
"Bianca and Chastity walk outside Joey catches up to them.",
"JOEY A bunch of us are going to Jaret's house.",
"Wanna come?",
"Chastity looks at Bianca, who wears a pained expression.",
"She looks at her watch.",
"BIANCA I have to be home in twenty minutes.",
"CHASTITY (eagerly, to Joey)",
"I don't have to be home 'til two.",
"JOEY Then, c'mon.",
"(to Bianca)",
"Maybe next time --",
"They head back into the party, leaving an astonished Bianca",
"Cameron exits the party and stops when he sees Bianca standing alone.",
"CAMERON (slightly accusatory) Have fun tonight?",
"BIANCA Tons",
"He starts to walk on",
"BIANCA (continuing) Cameron?",
"He stops.",
"She gives him a helpless smile.",
"BIANCA (continuing) Do you think you could give me a ride home?",
"INT. KAT'S CAR - NIGHT",
"Patrick drives as Kat sits in the passenger seat, fiddling with the radio dial.",
"She finds a SONG she's happy with and Patrick quickly changes it.",
"PATRICK I'm driving, so I get to pick the tunes.",
"She changes it back to her song.",
"KAT It's my car.",
"He changes it back.",
"PATRICK And I'm in control of it.",
"KAT",
"But it's Gigglepuss - I know you like them.",
"I saw you there.",
"Patrick doesn't have an answer for this, so he let's her listen to her song.",
"KAT (continuing) When you were gone last year -- where were you?",
"PATRICK Busy",
"KAT Were you in jail?",
"PATRICK Maybe.",
"KAT No, you weren't",
"PATRICK Then why'd you ask?",
"KAT Why'd you lie?",
"He doesn't answer, but instead, frowns and turns up the music.",
"She bobs her head drunkenly.",
"KAT (continuing) I should do this.",
"PATRICK Do what?",
"KAT This.",
"She points to the radio",
"PATRICK Start a band?",
"KAT (sarcastically)",
"My father wouldn't approve of that that",
"PATRICK You don't strike me as the type that would ask permission.",
"She turns to look at him.",
"KAT Oh, so now you think you know me?",
"PATRICK I'm gettin' there",
"Her voice loses it's venom",
"KAT The only thing people know about me is that I'm \"scary\".",
"He turns to look at her -- she looks anything but scary right now.",
"He tries to hide his smile.",
"PATRICK",
"Yeah -- well, I'm no picnic myself.",
"They eye each other, sharing a moment of connection, realizing they're both created the same exterior for themselves.",
"Patrick pulls into her driveway and shuts off the motor.",
"He looks up at her house.",
"PATRICK (continuing)",
"So what ' s up with your dad?",
"He a pain in the ass?",
"KAT He just wants me to be someone I'm not.",
"PATRICK Who?",
"KAT BIANCA",
"PATRICK No offense, but you're sister is without.",
"I know everyone likes her and all, but ...",
"Kat stares at him with new admiration.",
"KAT You know -- you're not as vile as I thought you were.",
"She leans drunkenly toward him.",
"Their faces grow closer as if they're about to kiss",
"And then Patrick turns away",
"PATRICK So, I'll see you in school",
"Kat stares at him, pissed.",
"Then gets out of the car, SLAMMING the door shut behind her.",
"CAMERON'S CAR - NIGHT",
"Bianca and Cameron ride in silence.",
"He finally breaks it.",
"CAMERON I looked for you back at the party, but you always seemed to be \"occupied\".",
"BIANCA (faux-innocence ) I was?",
"CAMERON You never wanted to go out with 'me, did you?",
"Bianca bites her lip.",
"BIANCA (reluctant)",
"Well, no...",
"CAMERON Then that's all you had to say.",
"BIANCA",
"But",
"CAMERON You always been this selfish?",
"BIANCA thinks a minute",
"He pulls up in front of the house",
"CAMERON Just because you're beautiful, doesn't mean you can treat people like they don't matter.",
"She looks at him for a moment -- then grabs his face and gives him a kiss on the lips.",
"He draws back in surprise, then kisses her back.",
"She smiles, then gets out of the car without another word.",
"Cameron grins and drives away",
"CAMERON (continuing)",
"And I'm back in the saddle.",
"INT. ENGLISH CLASS - DAY",
"Kat sits at her desk, burying her face in a book as the others enter.",
"The White Rastas are first.",
"DEREK Kat, my lady, you sway to the rhythm of my heart.",
"He grabs her hand and kisses it as she pulls it away.",
"CLEM, a cowboy, enters, high-fiving Derek with new-found friendliness.",
"CLEM Yippe kai-aye, bra.",
"(to Kat) Dance for me, cowgirl.",
"He sits next to Derek",
"CLEM (continuing)",
"Okay, now tell me again why he didn't shoot the deputy?",
"DEREK Because the deputy meant him no harm, my friend.",
"It was only the sheriff that was the oppressor.",
"Joey saunters in and takes his seat.",
"JOEY Kat, babe, you were on fire.",
"Mrs. Blaise enters and sits at her desk",
"MRS.",
"BLAISE",
"Well now, did everyone have a good weekend?",
"JOEY Maybe we should ask Verona",
"Patrick enters, late, and slinks to his desk.",
"Kat looks up, down and around, everywhere but at Patrick.",
"Mrs. Blaise tries to remember what she's supposed to talk about.",
"MRS.",
"BLAISE",
"Okay then.",
"Well.",
"(beat)",
"Oh, yes",
"She clears her throat.",
"MRS. BLAISE (continuing)",
"I'd like you all to write your own version of Shakespeare's Sonnet #141.",
"Groans.",
"MRS. BLAISE (continuing) Any form you'd like.",
"Rhyme, no rhyme, whatever.",
"I'd like to see you elaborate on his theme, however.",
"Let's read it aloud, shall we?",
"Anyone?",
"The class is frozen in apathy.",
"MRS. BLAISE (continuing) Derek?",
"Ms. Blaise hands him the sonnet.",
"He shifts uncomfortably in his seat.",
"Then grins.",
"DEREK (reading; in his Rasta stoner drawl) In faith, I do not love thee with mine eyes/ For they in thee a thousand errors note/",
"But 'tis my heart that loves what they despise/ Who in despite of view is pleas 'd to dote.",
"In the back of the room Clem raises his hand",
"CLEM Ms. Blaise, can I get the bathroom pass?",
"Damn if Shakespeare don't act as a laxative on my person.",
"INT.",
"KENNY'S THAI FOOD DINER - DAY Kat and Mandella scrape the peanuts out of their sauce.",
"MANDELLA You went to the party?",
"I thought we were officially opposed to suburban social activity.",
"KAT I didn't have a choice.",
"MANDELLA You didn't have a choice?",
"Where's Kat and what have you done with her?",
"KAT I did Bianca a favor and it backfired.",
"MANDELLA You didn't",
"KAT I got drunk.",
"I puked.",
"I got rejected.",
"It was big fun.",
"Patrick enters, walking to the counter to order.",
"He sees Kat and smiles.",
"PATRICK Hey",
"She gathers her things and bolts out the door.",
"Patrick looks at Mandella, who shrugs and follows Kat.",
"INT.",
"BIOLOGY CLASS - DAY Cameron and Michael flank Patrick at his lab table",
"MICHAEL So you got cozy with she who stings?",
"PATRICK No - I've got a sweet-payin' job that I'm about to lose.",
"CAMERON What'd you do to her?",
"PATRICK I don ' t know.",
"(beat)",
"I decided not to nail her when she was too drunk to remember it.",
"Michael and Cameron look at each other in realization, then turn back to Patrick.",
"CAMERON",
"You realize this puts the whole operation in peril.",
"PATRICK",
"No shit.",
"She won't even look at me",
"CAMERON",
"Why can't you just tell her you're sorry?",
"Patrick's expression says that this is not a possibility.",
"Michael makes a time out sign with his hands.",
"MICHAEL I'm on it",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Mandella is at her locker.",
"Drawings of William Shakespeare adorn the door.",
"She looks at them with a sigh, then ties her silk scarf tightly around her neck, in an attempt to cut off her air supply.",
"Michael walks up.",
"MICHAEL Hey there.",
"Tired of breathing?",
"MANDELLA (shyly, as she loosens the scarf) Hi.",
"MICHAEL Cool pictures.",
"You a fan?",
"MANDELLA Yeah.",
"I guess.",
"MICHAEL rocks.",
"Very hip.",
"MANDELLA You think?",
"MICHAEL Oh yeah.",
"She looks at him suspiciously",
"MANDELLA Who could refrain that had a heart to love and in that heart, courage to make ' B love known?",
"Michael thinks for a minute.",
"MICHAEL Macbeth, right?",
"MANDELLA (happily stunned)",
"Right.",
"MICHAEL Kat a fan, too?",
"MANDELLA (puzzled) Yeah...",
"He leans in close to her, conspiratorially",
"MICHAEL So, listen...",
"I have this friend",
"EXT. FIELD HOCKEY FIELD - DAY",
"Cameron sits next to Patrick on the bleachers as they watch Kat's practice.",
"CAMERON She hates you with the fire of a thousand suns .",
"That's a direct quote",
"PATRICK She just needs time to cool off I'll give it a day.",
"A PUCK flies at them from the field, narrowly missing their heads.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Maybe two.",
"He looks at Cameron.",
"PATRICK (continuing) You makin' any headway?",
"CAMERON She kissed me.",
"PATRICK (eyebrow raised)",
"Where?",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Chastity rounds the corner and bends down to get a drink from the water fountain.",
"NEARBY",
"Joey stands talking to two JOCK COHORTS.",
"The guys don't see her.",
"JOEY Don't talk to me about the sweetest date.",
"That little halo Bianca is gonna be prone and proven on prom night.",
"Six virgins in a row.",
"The cohorts chortle Chastity keeps drinking from the fountain",
"EXT. PARKING LOT - DAY",
"Joey leans against Patrick's Jeep.",
"Patrick is inside.",
"PATRICK I don't know, Dorsey. ..",
"the limo.-the flowers.",
"Another hundred for the tux --",
"JOEY Enough with the Barbie n' Ken shit.",
"I know.",
"He pulls out his wallet and hands Patrick a wad of money",
"JOEY (continuing) Take it",
"Patrick does, with a smile, as he ROARS out of the parking lot.",
"INT. SCHOOL COURTYARD - DAY",
"Kat and Mandella deface a prom flyer.",
"KAT Can you even imagine?",
"Who the hell would go to this a bastion of commercial excess?",
"MANDELLA Well, I guess we're not, since we don't have dates .",
"KAT Listen to you!",
"You sound like Betty, all pissed off because Archie is taking Veronica.",
"MANDELLA Okay, okay, we won't go.",
"It's not like I have a dress anyway",
"KAT You ' re looking at this from the wrong perspective.",
"We're making a statement.",
"MANDELLA (unconvinced) Oh, good.",
"Something new and different for us.",
"EXT. ARCHERY FIELD - DAY",
"Mr. Chapin patrols as boys and girls shoot arrows at targets",
"Joey swaggers up to Bianca, who is taking careful aim.",
"Chastity watches from across the row.",
"JOEY Hey, sweet cheeks.",
"BIANCA (not looking at him)",
"Hi, Joey.",
"JOEY You're concentrating awfully hard considering it's gym class.",
"She lets the arrow go and turns to look at him.",
"JOEY (continuing) Listen, I want to talk to you about the prom.",
"BIANCA You know the deal.",
"I can ' t go if Kat doesn't go --",
"In the background, a RASTA crumples to the ground.",
"Hit A casualty of Gym.",
"Mr. Chapin scurries over.",
"JOEY Your sister is going.",
"Bianca looks at him, surprised",
"BIANCA Since when?",
"Joey takes the bow and arrow from Bianca's hand.",
"He draws back and takes aim.",
"JOEY I'm taking care of it.",
"Chastity looks over from her spot on the field, but keeps lips firmly shut.",
"INT. BOOK STORE - DAY",
"Kat browses through the feminist lit section Patrick appears, through a hole in the books.",
"PATRICK Excuse me, have you seen The Feminine Mystique?",
"I lost my copy.",
"KAT (frowning)",
"What are you doing here?",
"PATRICK I heard there was a poetry reading.",
"KAT You 're so --",
"PATRICK Pleasant?",
"Kat stares at him, deadpan.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Wholesome.",
"KAT Unwelcome.",
"PATRICK Unwelcome?",
"I guess someone still has her panties in a twist.",
"KAT Don't for one minute think that you had any effect whatsoever on my panties.",
"PATRICK So what did I have an effect on ?",
"KAT Other than my upchuck reflex?",
"Nothing.",
"She pushes past him and heads out the' door Pat looks down at the book he's been holding in his hand:",
"Taming of the Shrew.",
"INT. CAFETERIA - DAY",
"Cameron and Michael flank Patrick as he shovels food into mouth.",
"PATRICK You were right.",
"She's still pissed.",
"MICHAEL Sweet love, renew thy force!",
"PATRICK Man -- don't say shit like that to me.",
"People can hear you.",
"CAMERON (exasperated)",
"You humiliated the woman!",
"Sacrifice yourself on the altar of dignity and even the score.",
"MICHAEL Best case scenario, you're back on the payroll for awhile.",
"PATRICK What's the worst?",
"CAMERON You get the girl.",
"Patrick thinks for a minute",
"PATRICK If I go down.",
"I'm takin' her with me",
"INT. ENGLISH CLASS - DAY",
"Kat and the other students sit at their desks, taking a quiz Patrick's seat is conspicuously empty.",
"From outside, we hear the soft, unsure beginnings of a SONG.",
"Kat looks up, then out the window, HORRIFIED.",
"The song grows louder until we realize it's The Partridge Family's \"I Think I Love You\".",
"Being sung by Patrick.",
"PATRICK (0. S.)",
"\"This morning, I woke up with this feeling, I didn't know how to deal with, and so I just decided to myself--\"",
"The STUDENTS rush to the window.",
"OUTSIDE Patrick stands beneath the window, crooning.",
"Scurvy is next to him, keeping the beat on the bongos and doing backup vocal s.",
"PATRICK \"I'd hide it to myself.",
"And never talk about it.",
"And didn't I go and shout it when you walked into the room --\"",
"He makes quite a sarcastic show of it.",
"IN THE CLASSROOM",
"Mrs. Blaise touches her heart, as if the song is for her.",
"Kat slowly walks to the window, peeking below.",
"OUTSIDE",
"Patrick smiles at her as he finishes the verse with a big finale.",
"PATRICK (continuing) \"",
"I think I love you I \"",
"INSIDE",
"The other students laugh, clap, cheer, etc.",
"Kat sinks down, mortified, but with a slight smile",
"INT. DETENTION HALL - DAY",
"Patrick and several other miscreants sit quietly, mulling over their misfortune.",
"MISCREANT Nice song, Verona.",
"PATRICK Flog me.",
"He makes the appropriate hand gesture",
"Mr. Chapin, the gym teacher, sits at the desk in front, ignoring them while he reads a girly weightlifting magazine",
"KAT (0. S.)",
"Excuse me, Mr. Chapin?",
"Patrick looks up at the sound of her voice and sees Kat standing in the doorway.",
"She gives him a smile and he perks up a little.",
"Kat walks into the room and addresses Mr. Chapin again.",
"He turns fully to face her.",
"KAT Sir, I'd like to state for the record that Mr. Verona ' s current incarceration is unnecessary.",
"I never filed a complaint.",
"MR.",
"CHAPIN You didn't have to.",
"He disrupted a classroom.",
"Kat glances over at Patrick and motions her head toward the window.",
"Patrick shrugs, not knowing what she ' s talking about.",
"She motions again, and looks toward the window with an expression that says, \"Make a break for it, moron.\"",
"Kat brings her attention back to Mr. Chapin while Patrick inches out of his seat toward the window.",
"The other miscreants watch with glee.",
"KAT But, Mr. Chapin, I hardly think a simple serenade warrants a week of detention.",
"There are far more hideous acts than off-key singing being performed by the student body on a regular basis.",
"Patrick is halfway out the window now.",
"And none too happy about it, considering they're on the second floor.",
"He eyes a large TREE a few feet away from MR. CHAPIN.",
"He starts to turn away from Kat",
"MR.",
"CHAPIN",
"You're not gonna change my mind, Kat.",
"Rules stick.",
"Kat starts to panic, as Patrick has yet to make the jump for the tree.",
"KAT Wait, Mr. Chapin.",
"There's something I've always wanted to show you.",
"He turns back toward her again, the very second before he would have spotted Patrick.",
"Kat glances toward the window.",
"Patrick's just about to make the jump.",
"MR.",
"CHAPIN",
"What?",
"KAT These.",
"From behind, we see her lift up her shirt and flash her bra at Mr. Chapin, just as Patrick makes the Jump.",
"The miscreants cheer, for both the daring' escape and the flash of skin.",
"Mr. Chapin reddens and tries to be stern.",
"MR.",
"CHAPIN I'm going to let that slide, Katarina.",
"But if I catch you doing that again, you'll be in here with the rest of these guys.",
"He motions to the remaining detention prisoners, without noticing Patrick's absence.",
"Kat smiles at him.",
"KAT Thank you, Mr. Chapin.",
"Kat bolts out the door.",
"Mr. Chapin goes back to his muscle mag, wiping the sweat from his brow.",
"EXT. SCHOOL CAMPUS LAWN",
"Kat arrives at the tree.",
"looking around breathlessly, seeing no one.",
"KAT He left!",
"I sprung the dickhead and he cruised on me.",
"PATRICK (0. S.) Look up, sunshine",
"She does.",
"He's still in the tree",
"PATRICK I guess I never told you I'm afraid of heights.",
"KAT (smiling) C'mon.",
"It's not that bad",
"PATRICK Try lookin' at it from this angle",
"She assesses the branch structure",
"KAT Put your right foot there --",
"PATRICK Forget it.",
"I'm stayin'.",
"KAT You want me to climb up and show you how to get down?",
"PATRICK (voice trembling) Maybe.",
"She sighs and dose so.",
"When she gets to his level, she perches on the branch next to him.",
"He grins at her.",
"Then swings himself down with the grace and ease of a monkey, leaving her sitting there, realizing she's been duped.",
"KAT You shit!",
"She climbs down after him",
"EXT. OUTDOOR ARCADE - DAY",
"Patrick and Kat walk amongst the games",
"KAT The Partridge Family?",
"PATRICK I figured it had to be something ridiculous to win your respect.",
"And piss you off.",
"KAT Good call.",
"PATRICK So how'd you get Chapin to look the other way?",
"KAT I dazzled him with my wit",
"She stops and picks up a toy gun that SHOOTS water at giggling hyenas and wails on it.",
"The barker hands her a stuffed animal as her prize.",
"She hands it to the small KID next to her and they continue walking.",
"PATRICK (sarcastic) A soft side?",
"Who knew?",
"KAT Yeah, well, don't let it get out",
"PATRICK So what's your excuse?",
"KAT Acting the way we do.",
"PATRICK",
"Yes",
"KAT I don't like to do what people expect.",
"Then they expect it all the time and they get disappointed when you change.",
"PATRICK So if you disappoint them from the start, you're covered?",
"KAT Something like that",
"PATRICK Then you screwed up",
"KAT How?",
"PATRICK You never disappointed me.",
"She blushes under his gaze",
"PATRICK (continuing) You up for it?",
"KAT For. . . ?",
"He motions to the SIGN for a paint-ball game.",
"She grins SERIES OF SHOTS:",
"The two of them creep through the paint-ball course, stealthy and full of the desire to best the other.",
"Patrick nails Kat in the back with a big glob of red paint Kat gets him in the chest with a glob of blue.",
"Patrick returns fire with a big yellow splat to the side of her face.",
"Kat squirts a green shot to his forehead After a few more shots, they're both covered in paint",
"She tries to shoot him again, only to find that her gun is empty.",
"KAT (continuing)",
"Damn it!",
"Patrick grabs her in a victorious tackle.",
"They land, laughing.",
"It's hard to even recognize them, as their hair and faces are so smeared with paint globs, but they still manage to find each other's eyes.",
"He wipes a smear of blue paint away from her lips, as he goes to kiss her.",
"NEARBY The kid with the stuffed animal, points",
"KID Look, Mom",
"His mother hurries him away.",
"What's started as a tackle has turned into a passionate kiss",
"EXT. STRATFORD HOUSE - NIGHT",
"Patrick pulls up in Kat's driveway.",
"Their paint wardrobe has dried by now and they look like refugees from some strange, yet colorful, war.",
"KAT State trooper?",
"PATRICK Fallacy.",
"KAT The duck?",
"PATRICK Hearsay.",
"KAT I know the porn career's a lie.",
"He shuts off the car and turns to her.",
"PATRICK Do you?",
"He kisses her neck.",
"It tickles.",
"She laughs.",
"KAT Tell me something true.",
"PATRICK I hate peas.",
"KAT No -- something real.",
"Something no one else knows.",
"PATRICK (in-between kisses) You're sweet.",
"And sexy.",
"And completely hot for me.",
"KAT What?",
"PATRICK No one else knows",
"KAT You're amazingly self-assured.",
"Has anyone ever told you that?",
"PATRICK Go to the prom with me",
"Kat's smile disappears.",
"KAT Is that a request or a command?",
"PATRICK You know what I mean",
"KAT No.",
"PATRICK",
"No what?",
"KAT No, I won't go with you",
"PATRICK Why not?",
"KAT Because I don't want to.",
"It's a stupid tradition.",
"Patrick sits quietly, torn.",
"He can't very well tell her he being paid to take her.",
"PATRICK People won't expect you to go...",
"Kat turns to him, getting angry.",
"KAT Why are you doing this?",
"KAT All of it -- what's in it for you?",
"He sits silently, not looking at her, confirming her suspicions.",
"KAT (continuing) Create a little drama?",
"Start a new rumor?",
"What?",
"PATRICK",
"So I have to have a motive to be with you?",
"KAT You tell me.",
"PATRICK You need therapy.",
"Has anyone ever told you that?",
"KAT (quietly) Answer the question, Patrick",
"PATRICK (angry) Nothing!",
"There's nothing in it for me.",
"Just the pleasure of your company.",
"He takes out a cigarette.",
"She breaks it in half before she SLAMS the car door and walks into the house.",
"Patrick PEELS out of the driveway.",
"Kat turns at the front door and watches him go",
"EXT. STREET - NIGHT",
"Patrick pulls up to a stop light and waits for .the green",
"He glances over at A DRUNKEN HOMELESS GUY in the median, who has decided that he doesn't need to wear pants.",
"Patrick pulls out his wallet, takes the wad of money Joey gave him and hands it to the homeless guy.",
"PATRICK cover that up",
"The light turns green and Patrick pulls away",
"INT. STRATFORD HOUSE/BATHROOM - NIGHT",
"Kat stands at the sink, scrubbing paint off of her face Bianca TAPS on the open door.",
"BIANCA Quick question -- are you going to the prom?",
"Kat pushes the door shut with a SLAM",
"INT. STUDY HALL - DAY",
"Cameron and Bianca sit together at their study cubby.",
"She fingers a strand of her hair.",
"BIANCA Then Guillermo says, \"If you go any lighter, you're gonna look like an extra on 90210.\"",
"CAMERON No...",
"Bianca stares at him for a moment.",
"BIANCA do you listen to this crap?",
"CAMERON What crap?",
"BIANCA Me.",
"This endless ...blonde babble.",
"I'm like, boring myself.",
"CAMERON Thank God!",
"If I had to hear one more story about your coiffure...",
"He mock stabs himself with a pencil as she giggles and smacks his hand away.",
"CAMERON (continuing) I figured you'd get to the good stuff eventually.",
"BIANCA",
"What good stuff?",
"CAMERON The \"real you\".",
"BIANCA Like my fear of wearing pastels?",
"He looks stricken.",
"BIANCA (continuing)",
"I'm kidding.",
"(beat)",
"You know how sometimes you just become this \"persona\"?",
"And you don't know how to quit?",
"CAMERON (matter of fact)",
"No",
"BIANCA",
"Okay -- you're gonna need to learn how to lie.",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Mandella struggles with the lock on her locker.",
"Finally, it opens.",
"Hanging inside is a beautiful DRESS, inspired by the 16th Century.",
"Mandella slowly unpins a NOTE from the dress.",
"INSERT - \"0 FAIR ONE. JOIN ME AT THE PROM. I WILL BE WAITING. LOVE, WILLIAM S.\"",
"Mandella's agog.",
"Trevor walks by and sees her holding the dress.",
"TREVOR You're gonna look splendiferous in that, Mandella.",
"Mandella looks up sharply, shaken from her reverie.",
"TREVOR (continuing) that's cool to say.",
"Mandella grins It is",
"MANDELLA",
"INT. STRATFORD HOUSE/DEN - DAY",
"Sharon is at her computer, Walter at his exercise bike",
"SHARON Would you rather be ravished by a pirate or a British rear admiral?",
"WALTER Pirate -- no question.",
"Bianca enters and walks over to Walter",
"BIANCA Daddy, I want to discuss the prom with you.",
"It's tomorrow night --",
"WALTER The prom?",
"Kat has a date?",
"BIANCA No, but",
"WALTER",
"It's that hot rod Joey, right?",
"That ' s who you want me to bend my rules for?",
"BIANCA",
"He's not a \"hot rod\".",
"Whatever that is.",
"WALTER You're not going unless your sister goes.",
"End of story.",
"BIANCA Fine.",
"I see that I'm a prisoner in my own house.",
"I'm not a daughter.",
"I'm a possession!",
"Bianca storms out.",
"WALTER (calling out)",
"You know what happens at proms?",
"Sharon stops her typing and looks up at Walter",
"SHARON They'll dance, they'll kiss, they'll come home.",
"Let her go.",
"WALTER Kissing?",
"Is that what you think happens?",
"Kissing isn't what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day.",
"INT. BIANCA'S ROOM - NIGHT",
"Bianca lies on her bed.",
"MTV blares.",
"A KNOCK sounds.",
"BIANCA Come in.",
"Kat enters and sits down on the bed, muting the TV.",
"KAT (kindly) Listen, I know you hate having to sit home because I'm not Susie High School.",
"BIANCA Like you care.",
"KAT I do care.",
"But I'm a firm believer in doing something for your own reasons, not someone else ' s .",
"BIANCA I wish I had that luxury.",
"I'm the only sophomore that got asked to the prom and I can't go, because you won ' t.",
"Kat clears her throat",
"KAT Joey never told you we went out, did he?",
"BIANCA",
"What?",
"KAT In 9th.",
"For a month",
"BIANCA (confused) Why?",
"KAT (self-mocking)",
"He was, like, a total babe",
"BIANCA",
"But you hate Joey",
"KAT Now I do.",
"Back then, was a different story.",
"BIANCA As in...",
"Kat takes a deep breath.",
"KAT He said everyone was doing it.",
"So I did it.",
"BIANCA You did what?",
"KAT (continuing on) Just once.",
"Afterwards, I told him I didn't want to anymore.",
"I wasn't ready.",
"He got pissed.",
"Then he broke up with me.",
"Bianca stares at her, dumbfounded",
"BIANCA",
"But",
"KAT After that, I swore I'd never do anything just because \"everyone else\" was doing it.",
"And I haven't since.",
"Except for Bogey's party, and my stunning gastro-intestinal display --",
"BIANCA (stunned) Why didn't you tell me?",
"KAT I wanted to let you make up your own mind about him.",
"BIANCA No.",
"you didn't!",
"If you really thought I could make my own decisions, you would've let me go out with him instead of helping Daddy hold me hostage.",
"Kat stands up slowly",
"KAT That's not",
"BIANCA I'm not stupid enough to repeat your mistakes.",
"KAT I guess I thought I was protecting you.",
"BIANCA God, you're just like him!",
"Just keep me locked away in the dark, so I can't experience anything for myself",
"KAT Not all experiences are good, Bianca.",
"You can't always trust the people you want to.",
"BIANCA I guess I'll never know, will I?",
"She rises and holds the door open for Kat, then slams it behind her.",
"EXT. STRATFORD HOUSE - DAY",
"A sprinkler cruises the lawn.",
"INT. KAT'S ROOM - DAY",
"Kat lies in bed, staring at the ceiling.",
"She rolls over and picks up the phone.",
"BIANCA'S ROOM - DAY",
"Bianca, still in her pajamas, eats a bowl of cereal while watching \"I Love Lucy\" reruns.",
"A KNOCK sounds",
"BIANCA Come in.",
"Kat opens the door and peers in with a grin",
"KAT Feel like shopping?",
"Bianca looks up, hopefully.",
"LIVING ROOM - NIGHT",
"Walter and Sharon are in front of the television.",
"Walter has the TV Guide in hand, glasses on.",
"WALTER What do you wanna watch?",
"We've got crap, crap, crap or crap",
"SHARON Dr. Ruth?",
"Bianca walks into the living room.",
"She's wearing a prom dress.",
"BIANCA Hi, Mommy.",
"(looking away) WALTER",
"Walter scurries takes off his glasses and looks from Bianca to Sharon.",
"SHARON Honey, you look beautiful!",
"BIANCA You like?",
"My date should be here in five.",
"WALTER I'm missing something.",
"BIANCA I have a date, Daddy.",
"And he ' s not a captain of oppression like some men we know.",
"The DOORBELL RINGS.",
"Bianca runs to open it.",
"There stands CAMERON.",
"He takes in Bianca's outfit.",
"CAMERON Wow",
"BIANCA Let's go.",
"Walter rises.",
"Sharon pulls him back down on the couch",
"SHARON (to Bianca) Have a great time, honey!",
"WALTER",
"But -- who -- what --?",
"The door SLAMS.",
"As Sharon looks at Walter with a grin, a blur rushes down the stairs and out the door.",
"The blur has Kat ' s voice.",
"KAT Hey, guys.",
"I'm going to the prom.",
"See you in a few.",
"The door SLAMS again.",
"Walter and Sharon 'are alone",
"WALTER What just happened?",
"SHARON Your daughters went to the prom.",
"WALTER Did I have anything to say about it?",
"SHARON Absolutely not.",
"WALTER That ' s what I thought",
"The DOORBELL RINGS again.",
"Walter opens it to find Joey on the porch, wearing a tux.",
"JOEY I'm here to pick up Bianca.",
"WALTER late",
"He SLAMS the door shut",
"EXT HOTEL PARKING LOT - NIGHT",
"Kat pulls up in her car, emerging resplendent in an ice gown.",
"Patrick sits on the steps, waiting.",
"In a tux.",
"KAT How'd you get a tux at the last minute?",
"PATRICK It's Scurvy's.",
"His date got convicted.",
"Where'd you get the dress?",
"KAT It's just something I had.",
"You know",
"PATRICK (smiling)",
"Oh huh",
"KAT Look, I'm -- sorry -- that I questioned your motives.",
"I was wrong.",
"Patrick winces slightly, but covers it with a smile",
"PATRICK No prob.",
"He remains seated.",
"Kat fidgets nervously.",
"KAT are you ready?",
"He rises and stares at her, taking in her image appreciatively.",
"She blushes and turns away.",
"KAT (continuing) C'mon. Let's get this over with.",
"INT. PROM - NIGHT",
"A hotel ballroom transformed into a fantasy world.",
"Patrick and Kat enter, Kat attempting to deny the romance of it.",
"KAT Quite the ostentatious display",
"A cowboy two-steps by them, dragging some poor girl around",
"PATRICK Look, Clem even wore his good boots",
"Kat steps forward, looking around and spots Cameron and Bianca dancing cheek to cheek.",
"She smiles.",
"ACROSS THE ROOM",
"Mandella enters nervously, in the long Elizabethan gown, hair piled on top of her head.",
"She spots Kat and hurries over.",
"MANDELLA Have you seen him?",
"KAT Who?",
"MANDELLA William - he asked me to meet him here.",
"KAT Oh, honey -- tell me we haven't' progressed to full-on hallucinations.",
"Patrick looks toward the door and taps Kat.",
"She turns and points Mandella the same way.",
"Michael - in full Shakespearean dress with a new goatee on his chin - bows in their direction.",
"Mandella's grin couldn't be bigger.",
"Michael swashbuckles over to them, taking Mandella's hand and leading her onto the dance floor.",
"MICHAEL Mi' lady.",
"(to Patrick)",
"Good sir.",
"Patrick rolls his eyes.",
"INT. PROM - NIGHT - LATER",
"Kat and Patrick dance to a slow SONG.",
"Whatever he's whispering into her ear is making her laugh.",
"Cam and Bianca dance nearby, glowing with happiness.",
"She whispers something in his ear and heads for the ladies' room",
"INT. LADIES ROOM - NIGHT",
"Bianca walks in, positively radiant.",
"Chastity emerges from a stall.",
"BIANCA (surprised) What are you doing here?",
"Chastity checks her hair in the mirror, aloof.",
"CHASTITY You think you ' re the only sophomore at the prom?",
"BIANCA I did.",
"Chastity maintains her snooty tone.",
"CHASTITY",
"And just so you know, my date isn't planning on spending most of the night in his backseat.",
"BIANCA",
"What're you talking about?",
"CHASTITY Joey Dorsey is only after one thing - - your cherry.",
"He practically made a public announcement.",
"Appalled, Bianca storms out.",
"Chastity tries to backpedal.",
"CHASTITY (continuing) I wanted to tell you",
"INT. PROM - NIGHT",
"Joey, drunk, disorderly and pissed off, walks in with a few stray jocks - also dateless.",
"He zeroes in on Cameron, now consoling a pissed-off Bianca.",
"Patrick and Kat continue to slow dance, oblivious to the evil about to erupt.",
"PATRICK My grandmother's .",
"KAT What?",
"PATRICK That's where I was last year.",
"She'd never lived alone -- my grandfather died -- I stayed with her.",
"I wasn't in jail, I don't know Marilyn Manson, and I've never slept with a Spice Girl.",
"I spent a year sitting next to my grandma on the couch watching Wheel of Fortune.",
"End of story.",
"He takes a breath and looks away, not meeting her eyes.",
"Kat stares at him for a moment and laughs a delighted laugh",
"KAT That ' s completely adorable!",
"PATRICK It gets worse -- you still have your freshman yearbook?",
"He's interrupted by Joey's hand on his shoulder.",
"JOEY What's Bianca doing here with that cheese dick?",
"I didn't pay you to let some little punk ass snake me.",
"ACROSS THE ROOM",
"Michael spots the altercation and dances Mandella over to Cameron and Bianca.",
"MICHAEL (to Cameron) Feces hitting fan. C'mon",
"Michael takes Cameron aside, leaving Mandella and Bianca staring after them.",
"ACROSS THE ROOM",
"Michael and Cameron approach Joey as he continues to taunt Patrick who keeps quiet, realizing the weight of this situation.",
"MICHAEL (continuing) Joey, pal, compadre. Let's take it easy.",
"Joey turns toward Michael and Cameron.",
"JOEY You two are in big trouble",
"Cameron faces Joey.",
"CAMERON Admit it.",
"You lost.",
"Be a man.",
"Joey PUNCHES Cameron in the face, taking him by surprise Cameron holds his nose as it bleeds onto his tux",
"The various cliques descend angrily and Joey is soon surrounded by seething Cowboys, Coffee Kids and White Rastas.",
"DEREK Very uncool, my brother",
"JOEY I'm not your brother, white boy.",
"The other Rastas GASP, as if stung by the realization that they're white.",
"Joey turns back to Patrick and Kat.",
"JOEY (continuing)",
"Just so you know -- she'll only spread her legs once.",
"Kat looks from Joey to Patrick, not sure what she's hearing.",
"Joey pushes through the crowd but a HAND drags him back.",
"It's Bianca.",
"And she BELTS the hell out of him",
"BIANCA",
"That's for making my date bleed",
"She BELTS him again",
"BIANCA (continuing)",
"That's for my sister.",
"And AGAIN",
"BIANCA (continuing)",
"And that's for me.",
"Cliques now descend on Joey, punching him wildly.",
"COWBOY",
"And that's for the fourth grade, asshole.",
"HOTEL - NIGHT",
"KAT runs down the stairs, Patrick chasing her",
"PATRICK Wait I...",
"KAT You were paid to take me out!",
"By -- the one person I truly hate.",
"I knew it was a set-up!",
"PATRICK It wasn't like that.",
"KAT Really?",
"What was it like?",
"A down payment now, then a bonus for sleeping with me?",
"PATRICK I didn't care about the money.",
"He catches up to her now",
"PATRICK (continuing) I cared about --",
"She turns to face him with a countenance more in sorrow than in anger.",
"KAT You are so not what I thought you were.",
"He grabs her and kisses her to shut her up.",
"After a second, she jerks away and flees down the stairs and out of sight.",
"Bianca stands at the top of the stairs, watching.",
"She's never looked more guilty.",
"INT. STRATFORD HOUSE - DAY",
"Kat is sprawled on the couch in sweats, wrapped in a blanket, watching \"Sixteen Candles\".",
"When Molly Ringwald leans across the birthday cake to get a kiss from her dream date, Kat changes the channel disgustedly, settling for an infomercial",
"The phone sits next to her.",
"Not ringing.",
"Bianca breezes in, bearing a cup of tea.",
"BIANCA Are you sure you don't want to come with us?",
"It'll be fun.",
"Kat takes the tea and gives a weak smile.",
"KAT I ' m sure .",
"Bianca sits down next to her",
"BIANCA You looked beautiful last night, you know.",
"KAT So did you",
"Bianca gives her a squeeze, then jumps up when the DOORBELL rings, opening the door to a waiting Cameron.",
"He peeks his head inside.",
"CAMERON She okay?",
"BIANCA I hope so.",
"The door shuts behind her as Walter enters.",
"WALTER Was that your sister?",
"KAT Yeah.",
"She left with some bikers Big ones.",
"Full of sperm.",
"WALTER Funny.",
"Walter sits down on the arm of the chair and watches the infomercial with Kat.",
"WALTER (continuing) I don't understand the allure of dehydrated food.",
"Is this something I should be hip to?",
"KAT No, Daddy.",
"WALTER (dreading the answer) So tell me about this dance.",
"Was it fun?",
"KAT Parts of it.",
"WALTER Which parts?",
"KAT The part where Bianca beat the hell out of some guy.",
"WALTER Bianca did what?",
"KAT What's the matter?",
"Upset that I rubbed off on her?",
"WALTER No -- impressed.",
"Kat looks up in surprise.",
"WALTER (continuing) You know, fathers don't like to admit that their daughters are capable of running their own lives.",
"It means we've become spectators.",
"Bianca still lets me play a few innings.",
"You've had me on the bleachers for years.",
"When you go to Sarah Lawrence, I won't even be able to watch the game.",
"KAT (hopeful) When I go?",
"WALTER Oh, Christ. Don't tell me you've changed your mind.",
"I already sent 'em a check.",
"Kat reaches over and gives him a hug",
"INT.",
"CAFETERIA - DAY Kat stands grabs a box of cornflakes from the food line.",
"CAMERON (0. S.) Katarina?",
"She turns and looks at him",
"CAMERON I'd like to express my apologies.",
"KAT For what?",
"CAMERON (looking down)",
"I didn't mean for you to get -- When Bianca asked me to find you a boyfriend, I had no idea it would turn out so -- ugly.",
"I would never have done anything to compromise your - - -",
"He trails off when he realizes she's thrown her food tray against the wall and marched off -- the old \"kill, kill\" look back in her eyes.",
"INT. HALLWAY - DAY",
"Kat stomps up the hallway, full of menace",
"CLASSROOM - DAY",
"Bianca's English teacher perches on the edge of a desk, open book in hand.",
"TEACHER Who can tell me at what point Lucentio admits his deception?",
"The door of the classroom FLIES open and an angry Kat stalks in, yanking Bianca from her chair and dragging her toward the hallway.",
"KAT (to the teacher) Family emergency.",
"HALLWAY - DAY",
"Bianca tries to pull away as Kat drags her by the hair between two rows of lockers.",
"BIANCA Let go!",
"KAT You set me up.",
"BIANCA I just wanted --",
"KAT What?",
"To completely damage me?",
"To send me to therapy forever?",
"What?",
"BIANCA No!",
"I just wanted",
"Miss Perky walks up",
"MISS PERKY Ladies?",
"Shall we take a trip to my office?",
"INT. MISS PERKY'S OFFICE - DAY",
"Miss Perky stares at both sisters as they sit before her, then focuses on Bianca.",
"MISS PERKY",
"So you're the real bitch",
"BIANCA",
"Yes!",
"Okay?",
"Yes -- I'm the real bitch.",
"I wanted her to get a boyfriend",
"so I could.",
"Apparently, this makes me a horrible person.",
"I'm sorry.",
"She turns to Kat.",
"BIANCA (continuing) I swear --",
"I didn't know about the money.",
"I didn't even know Joey was involved.",
"I would never intentionally hurt you, Kat.",
"MISS PERKY (to Kat) Do you care to respond?",
"KAT Am I supposed to feel better?",
"Like, right now?",
"Or do I have some time to think about it?",
"MISS PERKY Just smack her now.",
"Bianca rises, taking Kat by the arm.",
"BIANCA (to Miss Perky)",
"We'll be getting back to you.",
"MISS PERKY",
"What, no hug?",
"HALLWAY - DAY",
"And Bianca leave Miss Perky's office",
"BIANCA Is that woman a complete fruit-loop or is it just me?",
"KAT It's just you.",
"ENGLISH CLASS - DAY",
"Mrs. Blaise faces the class",
"MRS. BLAISE All right.",
"I'm assuming everyone found time to compose, their poems.",
"Except for Mr. Dorsey, who's still in ICU.",
"Nerds in the back high-five each other.",
"MRS. BLAISE (continuing) Would anyone care to read theirs aloud?",
"No one moves.",
"Then Kat slowly stands up.",
"KAT I'11 go",
"Patrick looks up.",
"MRS.",
"BLAISE",
"Oh, Lord.",
"She downs a couple Prozac",
"MRS. BLAISE (continuing) Please proceed.",
"Kat stands, puts on her glasses, and takes a deep breath before reading from her notebook.",
"KAT I hate the way you talk to me/ and the way you cut your hair/ I hate the way you drive my car/",
"I hate it when you stare.",
"She pauses, then continues",
"KAT (continuing) I hate your big dumb combat boots/ and the way you read my mind/",
"I hate you so much it makes me sick/ it even makes me rhyme.",
"She takes a deep breath, and looks quickly at Patrick, who stares at the floor.",
"KAT (continuing) I hate the way you're always right/ I hate it when you lie/ I hate it when you make me laugh/ even worse when you make me cry/ I hate it that you're not around/ and the fact that you didn't call/",
"But mostly I hate the way I don ' t hate you/ not even close, not even a little bit, not even any at all.",
"She looks directly at Patrick.",
"He looks back this time.",
"The look they exchange says everything.",
"Then she walks out of the room The rest of the class remains in stunned silence.",
"EXT. PARKING LOT - MOMENTS LATER",
"Kat walks to her car alone.",
"When she opens the door, she's greeted with a Fender Stratocaster guitar, reclining in the front seat.",
"She picks it up slowly, inspecting every detail, then spins around.",
"Patrick stands there, smiling.",
"KAT A Fender Strat.",
"You bought this?",
"PATRICK I thought you could use it.",
"When you start your band.",
"She doesn't answer, but hides a smile, so he walks closer.",
"PATRICK (continuing) Besides, I had some extra cash.",
"Some asshole paid me to take out a really great girl.",
"KAT Is that right?",
"PATRICK Yeah,",
"but then I fucked up.",
"I fell for her.",
"Blushes and looks down.",
"PATRICK (continuing) You know -- it's not every day you find a girl who'll flash her tits to get you out of detention.",
"Looks up.",
"surprised and embarrassed that he found out",
"He takes her upturned face as a sign to kiss her and he does She lets him this time.",
"Then breaks it off",
"KAT You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know.",
"He grimaces.",
"PATRICK I know",
"He quiets her with another kiss Which she breaks off again.",
"KAT And don't just think you can",
"He kisses her again, not letting her end it this time.",
"STRATFORD HOUSE - SUNSET",
"We hear the sounds of MUSIC and LAUGHTER.",
"STRATFORD HOUSE/BACKYARD - SUNSET",
"Patrick is at the barbecue grill, flipping burgers.",
"Kat watches.",
"KAT Why is my veggie burger the only burnt object on this grill?",
"PATRICK Because I like to torture you.",
"KAT Oh, Bianca? Can you get me my freshman yearbook?",
"PATRICK Don ' t you even dare. . .",
"ON BIANCA AND CAMERON",
"As they argue on the patio.",
"CAMERON They do to!",
"BIANCA They do not!",
"Rises to get the yearbook.",
"CAMERON Can someone please tell her that sunflower seeds come from sunflowers?",
"ON MICHAEL AND MANDELLA",
"Severely making-out in a lawn chair.",
"She comes up for a breath.",
"MANDELLA I can't remember a word of Shakespeare right now.",
"Isn't that weird?",
"Michael pulls her back down for another round ON KAT AND PATRICK",
"She tries to keep him from grabbing the yearbook that Bianca now hands her.",
"KAT You're freaked over this, aren't you?",
"Bianca hands her the yearbook",
"BIANCA",
"He's more than freaked.",
"He's froke",
"Flips to a page.",
"KAT I'd like to call your attention to Patrick Verona's stunning bad-ass look of 1995 ---",
"INSERT - A horrifically nerdy freshman year picture Glasses, bad hair, headgear -- the works.",
"She holds up the picture for all to view.",
"Patrick cringes and throws a handful of pretzels at her.",
"BIANCA Patrick -- is that- a.",
"KAT Perm?",
"PATRICK Ask my attorney.",
"Kat and Bianca huddle over the picture, giggling -- as we CRANE UP and hear a GIRLY PUNK version of The Partridge Family's \"I Think I Love You\".",
"FADE OUT:",
"END"
] |
12
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/12 Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/12.html
|
Lawrence Bridges
|
Comedy
|
1997
|
[
"12 - Script",
"CUT FROM BLACK",
"TITLE: FIN",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY Fin of red 1957 Chevy Impala convertible driving somewhere in the West.",
"A car passes going the other way.",
"TITLE: PLACE:",
"Los Angeles",
"MUSIC:",
"Shadowy Men On A Shadowy Planet \"Good Cop, Bad Cop.\"",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY POV driving on freeway in rain.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY People with umbrellas standing on corner.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY People with umbrella walking over bridge.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY People walk across downtown intersection with umbrellas, bus in background.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY Rain and shadow on pavement.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY LA river wide, medium, close.",
"We see graffiti swamped by high water.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY Large man walking with umbrella.",
"WE HEAR: THUNDER",
"MUSIC STOPS",
"FIRST WOMAN I've been here one year and I've lived through an earthquake, fires, floods...",
"SECOND WOMAN The rains...it just keeps coming...",
"the floods...the hillsides are coming down... you can't get to and from work and it's just a mess.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY People walking against high winds, umbrella reversed.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY Family walking in the rain.",
"Children protected by plastic bags.",
"THIRD WOMAN You survive by natural instincts, you go with the flow.",
"SFX: THUNDER",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY Woman's foot stepping across swollen gutter.",
"MUSIC RESTARTS",
"EXTERIOR - LA RIVERDAY Prow of buttress in rapids.",
"The rains have stopped, only the floods remain.",
"EXTERIOR - BEACH - EVENING Waves breaking on beach.",
"EXTERIOR - OCEAN - NIGHT Tanker at night.",
"EXTERIOR - AIRPORT - NIGHT Airplane lights come on.",
"EXTERIOR - OCEAN - NIGHT Landing lights over water.",
"EXTERIOR - AIRPORT - NIGHT Airplane landing at night.",
"SFX jet passing overhead.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT Camera pans over the city and over the ocean.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT",
"The panning city lights converge with a passing car.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT It is TONY, a handsome man in his 30's, driving on Melrose.",
"He approaches an intersection that is blocked by a truck.",
"He flashes his headlights signaling to the truck to move and let him by but the truck stops.",
"TONY is stuck.",
"EXTERIOR - LA -DAY ALLEN, a stout comedian, at a temp job, answering phones.",
"TALK SHOW HOST (V.O.)",
"And we're back with \"Interpreting Your Dreams.\"",
"And I believe we have Allen in Hollywood on line...",
"12.",
"Hello Allen...are you there?",
"Hello..?",
"ALLEN has the TALK SHOW HOST on hold so he doesn't hear her.",
"ALLEN Okay...hold on.",
"Yeah I'll take care of you in a second...I'm transferring you over..",
"TALK SHOW HOST We are live on the air....",
"Hello...?",
"ALLEN Hello.?",
"Yeah",
"okay",
"I've got somebody else on hold...I'm going to transfer you over.",
"It might be a second, just hold on.",
"TALK SHOW HOST (aside)",
"I'm on hold..",
"EXTERIOR -",
"THE BIG ISLAND FROM ABOVE - DAY",
"The Big Island floats in sparkling light.",
"WE HEAR a radio show filtered through the small speaker of an old radio.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Okay, we're going to have to go...",
"ALLEN Okay, oh doctor.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Hello?",
"EXTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE FROM ABOVE - DAY",
"We see rooftops of ranch buildings from high above.",
"We HEAR the sound of a plane flying overhead.",
"We HEAR ALLEN'S voice.",
"ALLEN Are you there?",
"EXTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY",
"The Ranch House stands isolated in a dry island valley.",
"The plane passes overhead.",
"TALK SHOW HOST You're live on the air.",
"INSERT VIEW on RADIO.",
"We HEAR",
"ALLEN Can I use my real name on the radio?",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL is sitting in front of a mirror putting on her makeup.",
"She is listening to the broadcast.",
"She pays attention to ALLEN's dream when he says the word \"invisible\".",
"The TALK SHOW HOST speaks flatly, angrily.",
"TALK SHOW HOST",
"What is your dream?",
"ALLEN First of all I'm invisible.",
"I see myself looking in a mirror.",
"I'm having this dream almost every night.",
"MARIE-NOEL listens more carefully to the radio.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Yes?",
"VIEW ON: A Sparkling lake.",
"VIEW ON: MARIE-NOEL throwing bouquet at her wedding.",
"ALLEN And the next thing you know I'm getting married.",
"I don't know to whom....",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL looks in the mirror again; the conversation on the radio affirms something she knows to be true.",
"TALK SHOW HOST And how long have you been having this dream?",
"ALLEN Like an entire solid month.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Uh huh...",
"EXTERIOR - LA HARBOR - DAY",
"A truck wipes the frame and we see MARIE-NOEL walking along the highway at a leisurely pace.",
"ALLEN Then all of a sudden I see myself walking down a road by the harbor....",
"The TALK SHOW HOST interrupts.",
"WE HEAR a telephone ring.",
"TALK SHOW HOST And how do you feel at this point in the dream?",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT TONY, having been stopped by the truck, cuts down a side street to get around the gridlock.",
"We HEAR ALLEN's phone RING.",
"ALLEN Can you hold on for one second...",
"Hello.",
"TALK SHOW HOST No, actually we can't...",
"Hello?",
"INTERIOR - OFFICE - DAY ALLEN is trying to juggle too many things at once.",
"He tries to transfer incoming calls without losing them.",
"He has the TALK SHOW HOST on hold again.",
"ALLEN Yeah, I've got two other lines.",
"Can you hold a second?",
"Great....",
"TALK SHOW HOST Hello!",
"Allen from Hollywood!",
"ALLEN Hello...",
"yeah...hold on.",
"I can transfer you now.",
"EXTERIOR - HARBOR - DAY",
"A MAN fixes the tire of an old Mercedes as MARIENOEL walks into frame.",
"MARIE-NOEL stoops down and looks at his face.",
"The man has no awareness of her.",
"She is invisible.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Are you there?",
"Hello?",
"ALLEN Hi.",
"Hi.",
"Sorry.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Allen we don't have the time....",
"ALLEN Sorry..",
"TALK SHOW HOST Allen we're on the air and you can not put me on hold.",
"ALLEN I'm really sorry....",
"TALK SHOW HOST Go on with your dream Allen.",
"ALLEN Am I on?",
"TALK SHOW HOST Yes.",
"ALLEN Okay.",
"I'm walking along the road down by the harbor, and I'm invisible, and I go around looking at people knowing that they can't even see me and in this dream.....",
"INTERIOR - CAR - DAY MARIE-NOEL is now in the car with the driver who fixed the flat.",
"The driver cannot see her and MARIENOEL flicks his ear to tease him and test her invisibility.",
"ALLEN ...",
"I ride around with people.",
"I get in their cars, I go all over town.",
"INTERIOR - OFFICE - DAY ALLEN has risen to a peak in energy.",
"ALLEN I mean here...this, this, this.",
"TALK SHOW HOST",
"And how does it feel to you?",
"VIEW on PHONE: WE HEAR a RING",
"ALLEN Can you hold on a second?",
"NOTE:",
"DISCONTINUITY - Glasses disappear from ALLEN's Hand.",
"VIEW ON ALLEN",
"He turns to a colleague in the office while the TALK SHOW HOST languishes on hold.",
"ALLEN I've got two juice commercials.",
"I'm like the spokesman for the company now.",
"I got a Baske and Robbins, and I'm on avail for a couple of beer things that are going on..",
"WE HEAR another RING.",
"A hand in the foreground picks up a phone.",
"ALLEN goes back to the line of the TALK SHOW HOST.",
"COLLEAGUE Hello...",
"ALLEN Dr. Powell",
"I'm back....",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT TONY continues his shortcut around the gridlock.",
"His car passes camera in a suburban neighborhood.",
"TALK SHOW HOST I think we're running out of time here Allen.",
"ALLEN",
"Sorry to put you on hold....",
"You see then I get out of the car...",
"EXTERIOR - LA - EVENING ALLEN walks from his job to his car.",
"ALLEN ...and I walk all day...",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT MARIE-NOEL walks down Hollywood Blvd.",
"Creatures of the night surround her.",
"ALLEN ...and all night.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Don't put me on hold...",
"EXTERIOR - LA - NIGHT ALLEN walking on a back street.",
"ALLEN No, no, no, no.",
"I'm at work.",
"I'm at work.",
"TALK SHOW HOST Is this a real call?",
"ALLEN What do you think?",
"Do you think I'd make a fake call in the middle of work?",
"EXTERIOR - SIDE STREET LA - NIGHT TONY turns the corner and heads back to Melrose toward a point beyond the gridlock.",
"TALK SHOW HOST I'm feeling very left out here because you're not telling me how you feel.",
"I'm telling you....",
"EXTERIOR - MELROSE BLVD.- NIGHT MARIE-NOEL walks toward camera as ALLEN enters frame on the left.",
"ALLEN and MARIE-NOEL pass at the corner.",
"Neither notices the other.",
"TONY pulls into the frame at the intersection and MARIE-NOEL sees TONY who does not notice either ALLEN or MARIE-NOEL.",
"MARIE-",
"NOEL runs to TONY'S convertible car and jumps in the back.",
"She rides joyfully as TONY speeds off.",
"ALLEN And then this really strange thing happens.",
"TALK SHOW HOST",
"What do you do for a living?",
"ALLEN While I'm walking...I'm an Actor...",
"TALK SHOW HOST So in other words you are in limbo in your daily life.",
"ALLEN I'm walking, and I see myself walking, but I don't stop, I just keep on walking.",
"TALK SHOW HOST You must be feeling invisible in your daily life",
"and it's coming out in your dreams.",
"ALLEN I want to know what you think about the dream, let me finish it!",
"Can you hold on a second please?",
"TALK SHOW HOST You can not put me on hold....",
"I'm sorry but we're going to have to go to Mike in Downey on line 13. Thank you very much for calling.",
"TITLE: \"START HERE\"",
"EXTERIOR - LA - SUNRISE We see a distant mountain silhouetted against the morning light.",
"We HEAR a plane in the distance.",
"The plane is visible as a speck in the frame and flies close to the mountain.",
"The sun rises to the opening cadence of:",
"MUSIC: MOZART SYMPHONY 34 #1",
"The plane grows more faint as the sun continues to rise.",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - SUNRISE TONY and MARIE-NOEL walk across a playing field.",
"They look behind them fearfully.",
"MUSIC:",
"Evan Lurie \"Deception\"",
"TONY Come on...",
"MARIE-NOEL This isn't the way we came.",
"TONY",
"Yes it is.",
"TITLE: \"ACTOR CREDIT\"",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - SUNRISE TONY and MARIE-NOEL arrive at a park bench.",
"They sit on top of it, resting, waiting, then they interrupt each other.",
"TONY Let's not.",
"MARIE-NOEL Let's not.",
"Sorry.",
"TONY We'll just go home and we'll wait it out.",
"MARIE-NOEL",
"This place stinks!",
"MARIE-NOEL stands up and moves to the other side of the bench, her back towards TONY.",
"EXTERIOR - PALACE - NIGHT BRENDA walks through the rain toward the doors of the concert.",
"Wawa guitar bursts from the inside through the unopened doors.",
"BRENDA looks murderous in her wild hair and hot pants.",
"INTERIOR - HALLOWEEN PARTY TONY and MARIE-NOEL wander separately around the party as costumed hipsters sway with the music.",
"TWO WOMEN react in horror as something unseen occurs which causes the crowd to panic.",
"A SHEEP is left standing in the empty hall.",
"TITLE: \"ACTOR CREDIT\"",
"EXTERIOR - BENCH IN SAME PARK - SUNRISE TONY and MARIE-NOEL both scratch their ears at the same time.",
"A faint sound of thunder causes TONY to look into the distance.",
"They interrupt each other again.",
"TONY Let's not.",
"MARIE-NOEL You know.....",
"You know, at this point I'm blaming it all on bad karma.",
"This is how we die, man.",
"I wish they'd just get it over with.",
"MUSIC STARTS",
"TONY Don't give up.",
"I mean nothing has happened to us.",
"She'll probably be at the boat waiting for us when we get there.",
"EXTERIOR - ADJACENT STREET - SUNRISE BRENDA fast walks on a street next to the park.",
"As she approaches, she suddenly stops.",
"WE HEAR the sound of rain.",
"It is a clear morning.",
"Perplexed, she laughs.",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - SUNRISE TONY and MARIE-NOEL walk urgently through a wooded section of the park.",
"The sound of thunder gets louder and louder getting closer to them.",
"TONY grabs MARIE-NOEL'S arm as the fearful sound passes close to them without incident.",
"EXTERIOR - ADJACENT STREET - SUNRISE BRENDA walks past the camera, still perplexed by the odd occurrence.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - SUNRISE We see the mountain again and continue to HEAR the airplane.",
"EXTERIOR - WEST LOS ANGELES - SUNRISE",
"The fog is coming in.",
"Tops of buildings disappear.",
"TONY Let's not be naive about the earthquake...",
"EXTERIOR - CENTURY CITY FROM THE AIR - SUNRISE",
"The fog gets thicker...",
"TONY It's a good sign...",
"VIEW on WILSHIRE BLVD...",
"Thick Fog.",
"TONY That's what saved us.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - SUNRISE We see the silhouette of buildings from a distance.",
"The sun rises above them.",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - SUNRISE TONY and MARIE-NOEL continue to walk urgently through a wooded section of the park.",
"MARIE-NOEL Let me tell you, I had a premonition.",
"I had the worst feeling when she said she was going to go up and see the band.",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - DAY TONY and MARIE-NOEL walk along, totally engulfed in fog.",
"MARIE-NOEL",
"What if we get it for not warning her?",
"THEIR POV We see a sheep standing beside a tree in the fog.",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - MORNING",
"Through a fog we see a sheep standing next to a tree.",
"MARIE-NOEL and TONY arrive at the tree.",
"They are horrified.",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S BEDROOM - MORNING ALLEN's phone rings.",
"He wakes suddenly and sits up in bed; his answering machine goes on.",
"We HEAR MUSIC: \"Be My Baby\" coming from a source outside of the bedroom.",
"ALLEN'S VOICE Hi this is ALLEN at 969-8895.",
"I'm not home right now but if you want to leave me a message I'll get back to you as soon as you can...",
"ALLEN listens for a minute.",
"He is not quite awake.",
"TITLE: \"Actor Credit\"",
"ALLEN gets up and walks to the mirror waiting for his long message to end.",
"He looks melodramatically at his face.",
"We HEAR THUNDER.",
"He pulls at his face.",
"He sits back down on his bed waiting to see if someone is on the line.",
"ALLEN'S VOICE If it's important and during the day you can call me at Knapp Communications.",
"The number is (213) 932-1465.",
"Uh, I should be there all day.",
"And if it's not important and you don't want to call me there leave a message on this machine but don't hang up I really hate that",
"and, uh,that's it, bye.",
"We HEAR a BEEP but no one is on the line.",
"ALLEN's head hits the pillow and he flashes to.",
"Clip of Scorcese's Mean Streets.",
"Where Keitel's head hits the pillow.",
"ALLEN walking satisfied.",
"SCENE FROM ALLEN's Pizza commercial, elbows out.",
"EXTERIOR - STREET IN FRONT OF ALAN'S APARTMENT Camera dollies past a pickup truck.",
"The back of the truck is filled with shopping carts.",
"A man is loading shopping carts into the truck.",
"As the camera reaches the door of the truck we hear the source of the loud music.",
"We see EUGENE, a homeless man, who has his hand out to the driver of the truck.",
"The truck pulls away and EUGENE looks around in confusion.",
"We HEAR THUNDER.",
"EUGENE looks at ALLEN's building.",
"SCENE FROM ALLEN's deodorant commercial, elbows in.",
"Back to ALLEN rubbing his eyes",
"TITLE: \"Director Credit\"",
"CUT TO BLACK",
"SILENCE",
"MUSIC:",
"Bach:",
"Well Tempered Clavier #10",
"Rack focus: MOON",
"INTERIOR - ISLAND - NIGHT MARIE-NOEL is sitting in the dark, smoking a cigarette.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.)",
"My despair has a strange shape.",
"It doesn't hurt like something that hurts your body.",
"It's seeing the continuity.....",
"TITLE: MARIE-NOEL at about the time of the tragic loss of her half-sister.",
"VIEW ON TONY, speaking to MARIE-NOEL.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) .....of something hopeless going on and on year after year.....",
"VIEW ON Los Angeles at night",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) ....",
"When I close my eyes I see the city....",
"EXTERIOR - 24HR GAS STATION - NIGHT MARIE-NOEL walks aimlessly.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.)",
"But when I go out all I see are clues and patterns.....",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL writes at an old desk.",
"Wind blows through an open window.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) ...or the endless wait for coincidence.",
"EXTERIOR - 24HR GAS STATION - NIGHT MARIE-NOEL is at a loss.",
"She has exhausted her options.",
"MARIE-NOEL Events slowly unfold with the possibility that my patience will become accidental waste.",
"VIEW on MARIE-NOEL speaking to TONY.",
"MARIE-NOEL",
"But at the same time I see that it's exactly what put Mom in the position she was always in.",
"TONY The first time you feel sexual you see fate all around you?",
"Is that what you want?",
"MARIE-NOEL Yes, and I really deserve it.",
"TONY I have the feeling that that's dad's only motive.",
"VIEW of Eclipse of the Moon.",
"TONY They think we are selfish...",
"TITLE: TONY in the city, FILMORE on the island.",
"TONY They think we should procreate.",
"TONY breathes a sigh.",
"INTERVIEWER (V.O.)",
"So there were two guys and what were their names?",
"EXTERIOR - FRONT YARD OF ALLEN'S HOUSE - NIGHT ALLEN squints from the bright news camera lights.",
"ALLEN Not two guys, a girl and a guy.",
"They were related.",
"Marie-Noel that's her name, not very Greek I know...",
"INTERVIEWER",
"And she was the one you were married to?",
"ALLEN Yes.",
"INTERVIEWER Who own this house?",
"ALLEN I do, I mean we did.",
"MUSIC STARTS",
"EXTERIOR - LOS ANGELES - DAY TONY across railroad tracks.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) You stand to lose everything you worked for in the last 60 years.",
"The ranch, our inheritance....",
"EXTERIOR - LOS ANGELES - DAY TONY walks on the sidewalk next to a busy street flipping a coin.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) Why have you set out to prove everything is here by chance?",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND BACK COUNTRY - DAY MARIE-NOEL walks across a grassy field and sees a vortex of oak leaves swirling under a tree.",
"We see she is suddenly disturbed by her own feelings.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) I wasn't too young to know what happened the last time we were found out.",
"You don't act like I'm the next to die.",
"EXTERIOR - FRONT YARD OF ALLEN'S HOUSE - NIGHT ALLEN continues his interview.",
"ALLEN",
"It started this way.",
"INTERVIEWER",
"So you're an actor?",
"ALLEN",
"Yes.",
"I'm an actor.",
"That's where I met the guy.",
"INTERIOR - ELEVATOR - DAY ALLEN stands inside elevator and TONY gets in.",
"ALLEN I met him at a casting call for a commercial...",
"He said his name was Tony.",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD - DAY ALLEN walks along the sidewalk on his way to a casting call.",
"ALLEN I was late...",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S TEMP JOB - DAY ALLEN talks on the phone wearing sunglasses.",
"ALLEN",
"So I had to make up an excuse for work..",
"WIDER view on ALLEN at work.",
"ALLEN Some temp job I was working downtown.",
"VIEW on Rainy sky with jet and palm tree.",
"VIEW on LA river.",
"VIEW on PEOPLE at bus stop.",
"ALLEN It was raining, and there was this flood and everybody was jittery.",
"EXTERIOR - FRONT YARD OF ALLEN'S HOUSE - NIGHT ALLEN continues his interview.",
"ALLEN Because something that big in nature doesn't usually happen around here except an earthquake, or your occasional rare winter snowstorm every ten or twenty years.",
"EXTERIOR - AGAINST BLACK - NIGHT MARIE-NOEL speaks to TONY.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) I know why you're so happy all the time.",
"This place is a free lunch.",
"VIEW of TONY flipping coin.",
"VIEW of cliffs on island.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) Reality is a refraction from a physical process.",
"The sum of the stars is nothing.",
"MUSIC BUILDS, we hear WIND",
"VIEW of trees blowing.",
"VIEW of MARIE-NOEL writing.",
"EXTERIOR - LOS ANGELES - DAY",
"We PAN with an ambulance as it passes.",
"Tony walks along flipping coin.",
"Walking across crosswalk, he changes his direction.",
"Comes to an intersection.",
"MUSIC STOPS",
"We HEAR: City street ambiance.",
"TONY flips again, sees \"Heads\" walks on.",
"EXTERIOR - Los Angeles - DAY Comes to an impasse, gives up.",
"MUSIC:",
"Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Concert for Piano & Orchestra #20",
"EXTERIOR - FRONT YARD OF ALLEN'S HOUSE - NIGHT ALLEN continues his interview.",
"TITLE: ALLEN'S tabloid interview, at the end, after it was all over.",
"CAMERA MAN Okay, ready to roll.",
"INTERVIEWER What's your name?",
"ALLEN Allen.",
"INTERVIEWER",
"And you were kidnapped by aliens, did you say?",
"ALLEN No, no, no, no.",
"I was involved with this woman and this guy.",
"INTERVIEWER Wait, wait, wait, let me understand this...",
"you were involved with a goddess?",
"Like a Greek goddess?",
"ALLEN With a Greek, Zeus, Athena type goddess.",
"INTERVIEWER Where is she now?",
"ALLEN",
"She's like hunting quail in the Sierras now.",
"INTERVIEWER What?",
"ALLEN She left me for dirt.",
"INTERVIEWER",
"And were you married?",
"ALLEN Yeah, we were married right before....",
"TITLE: \"Allen at about the time the disasters started\"",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY ALLEN waits in an empty apartment, tired of life.",
"EXTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY TONY walks past the building still flipping a coin.",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY WE HEAR a door slam.",
"Off Screen: ALLEN and ARTEMIS (as AUGUST) walk into living room.",
"AUGUST leads the way in, glances into the room on the left.",
"WE HEAR Door slam.",
"Off Screen.",
"ALLEN and AUGUST (as ARTEMIS) walk into living room.",
"AUGUST leads the way in, glances into the bedroom on the left.",
"ALLEN Look around.",
"It's a 1 bedroom, 1/2 bath in the hall and full vanity...laundry downstairs.",
"AUGUST Is it quiet?",
"ALLEN Very quiet.",
"Where you from?",
"August stops in left of frame, turns to ALLEN.",
"AUGUST Nashville.",
"ALLEN First time in LA?",
"AUGUST Yeah, I just got a \"Seventeen\" cover and everyone said I should come here.",
"ALLEN Where are you staying?",
"AUGUST With my Aunt.",
"ALLEN Do you act?",
"August approaches the camera.",
"She is wearing 1/2 moon earrings.",
"AUGUST No, just modeling for now.",
"But I've heard about some really great workshops from my agent.",
"AUGUST feels satisfied with what she sees as she gazes into the bedroom.",
"ALLEN draws closer.",
"ALLEN I'm an actor.",
"TV commercials, some stage.",
"I know just about everybody in town, free advice, comes with the rent.",
"AUGUST.",
"How much is it?",
"ALLEN Well, the first month's free.",
"You've got to come up with some kind of security deposit, figure one month and then the last month and that comes to half the price published in the ad.",
"AUGUST.",
"(No response)",
"ALLEN Does that seem like a lot?",
"AUGUST Well for Tennessee standards, but I don't know.",
"ALLEN Do you know why the apartment's only half per month of the going rate for this size apartment in Hollywood?",
"AUGUST.",
"No.",
"ALLEN Because I sleep here 1 night a week.",
"AUGUST looks at the bedroom, looks in, shocked by what she has just heard.",
"She seems confused for a moment.",
"She turns and faces ALLEN.",
"ALLEN stares at her while blocking the doorway.",
"She hesitates and makes him budge.",
"ALLEN backs off and August slowly walks out of the apartment.",
"ALLEN is left standing alone in the empty apartment.",
"MUSIC:",
"Bach Concerto in D Minor",
"EXTERIOR - DISNEYLAND - DAY TONY walks along the street and sees the Monorail pass.",
"VIEW on TONY as he walks past the Big Donut.",
"VIEW on TONY as he walks past the theme restaurant at LAX.",
"VIEW on TONY as he walks past the Chinese Theater in Hollywood.",
"TONY looks at people he passes.",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S APARTMENT - DAY ALLEN in corridor.",
"Allen exits and three people come out of their apartments simultaneously.",
"WE HEAR a TELEPHONE",
"EXTERIOR - STREET IN LOS ANGELES - DAY EUGENE walks along the street.",
"He hears a pay phone ring.",
"Eugene picks it up and HEARS a voice.",
"VOICE TONY, are you there?",
"Come on!",
"Pick up the phone!",
"EUGENE panics and runs off.",
"MUSIC:",
"Guy Klucevsek's \"Reprieve.\"",
"INTERIOR - BLACK BARBERSHOP - DAY",
"We PAN from the pay phone in the barber shop where a man is on the phone...",
"VOICE TONY, are you there, Tony!",
"Tony!",
"Tony!",
"...and find TONY at the door looking at the coin.",
"It indicates he should go into a Barber shop.",
"TONY looks inside the Barber shop and sees threatening faces.",
"He enters anyway.",
"Goes up to GUY SELLING SODA who takes the coin out of TONY's hand and gives him a soda.",
"TONY is puzzled.",
"DISSOLVE:",
"Tony is siting in a chair with a cloth wrapped up to his neck.",
"The barber looks at TONY'S hair.",
"TONY is trying to open the can but can't figure it out.",
"TONY Do you have a church key?",
"Everybody in the barbershop laughs.",
"The barber opens the soda for him.",
"BARBER What will it be?",
"TONY I'll......",
"Thugs slowly get up from their chairs, dropping their magazines, surrounding TONY.",
"GUYS",
"Yeah, what'll it be man?",
"TONY looks around at the 8 mean faces around him.",
"TONY I want to cure my passive aggressive personality.",
"From now on when I want something I'm going to ask for it.",
"I'm going to learn how to be more observant of signs and consider how other people might need clearer signals from me.",
"GUY 1 Why don't you get a job.",
"That's what the man says....",
"GUY 2 ...You look good, you'd do great in an interview.",
"GUY 1 Join a group.",
"Do something for other people.",
"GUY 3 Go up and talk to people.",
"See if you have someone in common...",
"GUY 4 Do some charity work...",
"ALL Mingle..Be creative.",
"Take chances.",
"Take ownership.",
"GUY 3 Ride the bus....",
"MUSIC: Rachmaninoff Prelude in G minor Op 23, No.5",
"INTERIOR - OFFICE - DAY",
"A woman sits in the shadows of a government welfare office.",
"BRENDA This case is a mess.",
"We don't know what is going on with the child.",
"No, no, no, no, no no, the couple is stonewalling.",
"Nobody has seen the child, in what, 15 years.",
"Every visit is marked \"guardian unavailable\".",
"Nobody bothers because it's the island.",
"And get this, the couple, they're not married.",
"No.",
"They're the step-children of the owner of the island who is now deceased...",
"EXTERIOR - CATALINA EXPRESS TERMINAL -",
"EARLY MORNING BRENDA walks into the terminal.",
"BRENDA (continuing) ...",
"I have a sniff writ and I'm going out there next week.",
"EXTERIOR - OFF AVALON - DAY",
"The Catalina Express pulls into the harbor.",
"BRENDA steps onto the prow of the boat letting off steam.",
"MUSIC:",
"Beethoven Violin Sonata #4 D Major",
"VIEW of Parasail in AVALON HARBOR",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON HARBOR - DAY",
"The CATALINA EXPRESS pulls up to the DOCK.",
"VIEW on The Casino, a Catalina Landmark.",
"We HEAR the sound of coffee cups.",
"INTERIOR - ISLAND OFFICE - DAY DAVE, an opposing Attorney, and TOSHI, his assistant, meet across the table with TONY and his attorney DOOLITTLE.",
"DOOLITTLE",
"The is your meeting so why don't we get down to business.",
"DAVE Sounds fine.",
"DOOLITTLE Call Boston if you want.",
"I don't think the time change will make any difference",
"Nervous looks among lawyers.",
"TONY is oblivious.",
"DAVE Your name is Filmore West, correct?",
"TONY does not answer.",
"DOOLITTLE",
"We're requesting an environmental impact study on the employment angle in Avalon.",
"DAVE Are you kidding?",
"Any loss in jobs will be absorbed in the Federal tourism franchise.",
"Employment will double, property and leases will increase in value.",
"The overall benefit will be stunning to the average citizen of Avalon.",
"DOOLITTLE",
"What if we tell everybody about the national resources here.",
"If you'll remember your history gentlemen, the civil war was won by the collateral in the Treasury created by the California gold rush.",
"We think the government needs a big hit of cash right now to cure the deficit.",
"Remember what Churchill said, a great government never has to face the truth nor pay cash.",
"DAVE Could we have a moment?",
"DOOLITTLE and TOSHI stand and walk from the table.",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON DOCK - DAYBRENDA storms off the boat.",
"MUSIC:",
"Mendolshon: Symphony #4 in A, Op.",
"90 (Italian)",
"DOOLITTLE We're looking very good here.",
"Just don't give them anything they can use.",
"Do not say anything.",
"INTERIOR - ISLAND OFFICE - DAY DAVE and TOSHI stand and walk to the corner of the room.",
"DAVE",
"What if we bring up the legality of him impersonating his grandfather.",
"TOSHI I think we need something stronger.",
"Any sexual harassment suits or child abuse.",
"He's a guardian.",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON INFORMATION BOOTH - DAY BRENDA enters frame and speaks with an OFFICER.",
"BRENDA Hello, I'm from the department of Human Services in LA.",
"I'm looking for a missing child who may be somewhere on the island.",
"SHERIDAN Name?",
"BRENDA A Marie-Christine West?",
"Her guardian is a Mr. Filmore West.",
"INTERIOR - INN ON MT.",
"ADA - DAY TONY and DOOLITTLE as they confer.",
"TONY I think I know what's going on here.",
"DOOLITTLE Good, good, good, good, just don't say anything.",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON INFORMATION BOOTH - DAY BRENDA continues to speak with the OFFICER.",
"BRENDA Did they have a child with them?",
"Or did they take this child with them?",
"The OFFICER interrupts BRENDA.",
"OFFICER They're brats.",
"They're very unpopular around here.",
"They're keeping the property values from tripling.",
"BRENDA Great, where can I find them?",
"SHERIDAN Probably France.",
"What would you do if you owned all of Catalina and Anacapa..?",
"MUSIC: Beethoven String Quartet #8 in E minor Op.59 #2 Trk #1",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON - DAY BRENDA walks, somewhat dazed, past the store fronts of AVALON.",
"OFFICER ...all the way to San Miguel including the Big Island which has gold deposits and the IRS are looking for them?",
"BRENDA's expression changes.",
"She becomes maniacal.",
"INTERIOR - INN ON MT.",
"ADA - DAY DAVE and TOSHI sit down again, ready with a response.",
"DOOLITTLE Don't say anything.",
"OPPOSING ATTORNEY hands TONY the documents.",
"DAVE I'd like to direct your attention to the signatures on these documents.",
"DOOLITTLE rips the document out of DAVE'S hand.",
"DOOLITTLE",
"This is intolerable!",
"DAVE One is a reconveyence of a second deed of trust, and the other is your recent letter to us.",
"You would have been 4 years old at the time of the first document.",
"WE HEAR the sound of a small earthquake.",
"ALL PARTIES loo up and around and it stops.",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON - DAY BRENDA is alarmed at the earthquake.",
"She spins, disoriented.",
"INTERIOR - INN ON MT.",
"ADA - DAY TONY has a knowing look on his face.",
"The earthquake is a good sign.",
"TONY You guys believe in fairy tales don't you?",
"DAVE We want to know who you are.",
"TONY This reminds me of the Tempest where the rightful Duke is robbed of his kingdom by his evil brother...",
"TOSHI Were you born in this country?",
"TONY ...and the evil brother puts the good Duke and his daughter out to sea in a small boat to die.",
"And at the end of the story....",
"DOOLITTLE My client is using a figure of speech.",
"DAVE Then where are we going with this, guys?",
"TONY You two are going to jail.",
"DOOLITTLE We're saying....you don't have enough money.",
"TONY turns to TOSHI.",
"TONY What do you say next?",
"TOSHI We're just representing the United States Government in an attempt to take what the people have a right to.",
"TONY Big Brother.",
"Orwell!",
"No, no, That's too recent.",
"DOOLITTLE",
"The situation is irreversible.",
"DOOLITTLE tries to keep TONY from standing up.",
"DAVE What are you going to do?",
"Act it out for us.",
"TONY heats up.",
"TONY ...",
"And it's raining and hailing and lightning's striking",
"and you guys think that I'm dead, but I'm not.",
"I'm really back in the big island with my daughter.",
"DOOLITTLE puts his hand on TONY'S shoulder to restrain him.",
"TONY",
"And you know what we're doing.",
"Playing chess, and having a picnic!",
"TONY stands up to leave and crashes into a waiter who trips and spills dishes on the floor.",
"MUSIC: BACH Concerto in D minor",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON HARBOR - DAY Tourist boats come and go.",
"INTERIOR - AVALON CLOTHING SHIP - DAY BRENDA looks at a map of the Channel Islands.",
"She sees the Big Island.",
"A woman behind the counter comes up to her.",
"COUNTER PERSON Hi.",
"Can I help you?",
"BRENDA Which way to the Big Island?",
"The camera tilts up to a map of the Channel islands.",
"EXTERIOR -",
"THE BIG ISLAND - DAY We pan up to reveal the Big Island in the middle of the Channel.",
"EXTERIOR -",
"THE BIG ISLAND - DAY TONY's boat enters the harbor.",
"EXTERIOR -",
"THE BIG ISLAND - DAY TONY's boat docks old fishing pier.",
"INSERT:",
"Water lapping over rocks.",
"WE HEAR:",
"SEAGULLS, then a HELICOPTER approaching overhead.",
"EXTERIOR -",
"THE BIG ISLAND DOCK - DAY The RANCH HAND runs to TONY'S boat to help him unload supplies.",
"VIEW of HELICOPTER passing overhead.",
"TIGHTER VIEW ON TONY and RANCH HAND",
"RANCH HAND You must have slept a long time.",
"TONY I've been sleeping a lot lately.",
"RANCH HAND",
"Yeah about 2 years.",
"The RANCH HAND helps TONY unload supplies from the boat.",
"TONY starts walking down the dock with an outboard motor.",
"RANCH HAND A woman named Reggie Swan confirmed she'll arrive March 4th.",
"She'll be staying until September.",
"I got the bunk house all ready for her.",
"The RANCH HAND goes back for a second box as TONY continues down the dock.",
"RANCH HAND There have been quite a few fly-overs by the park service.",
"The last 6 months there has been surf on the North point.",
"Anyone who can afford a boat has been streaming up here like freeway commuters.",
"TONY Yeah.",
"RANCH HAND This thing with the surfers has become some sort of a cult.",
"There have been a few entries on the South shore, young men looking for Marie-Noel...I vacated them immediately.",
"TONY Uh huh.",
"RANCH HAND",
"The park service has been on the island almost full time, as expected, and the monk from the monastery arrived for another year.",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND SHORELINE FROM MOUNTAIN TOP - DAY",
"The sun kicks off the water.",
"EXTERIOR - BIRD'S EYE VIEW OF MARIE-NOEL'S HIDEOUT - DAY",
"The hideout is nestled under eucalyptus trees in an island canyon.",
"MUSIC: SCHUBERT'S WINTERREISE",
"EXTERIOR - HIDEOUT - DAY It is a hot sunny day.",
"MARIE-NOEL sits in a hammock reading.",
"VIEW ON BOOK:",
"She is reading War and Peace.",
"INTERIOR - HOUSE - DAY BRENDA stands inside the house by the window.",
"She holds MARIE-NOEL'S bow and arrow.",
"She raises it slowly, aiming at MARIE-NOEL.",
"BRENDA looks angry and possessed.",
"BRENDA'S POV",
"The lethal arrowhead is pointed at MARIE-NOEL'S head.",
"CLOSER VIEW ON BRENDA BRENDA is about to release the arrow when she HEARS a PUPPY.",
"BRENDA'S POV on PUPPY A cute Dalmatian looks up at her, longing to be picked up.",
"VIEW ON BRENDA BRENDA puts down the bow and arrow to pick up the PUPPY.",
"As soon as she reaches for the PUPPY...",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL puts down her reading and goes into the house.",
"VIEW ON BRENDA ...",
"The PUPPY skitters away.",
"BRENDA follows it.",
"EXTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY EUGENE stands outside the ranch house.",
"He stares with a blank expression on his face, as if he does not know what he is doing there.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE KITCHEN - DAY She enters and starts looking for something missing.",
"The house has become a reading library, opened books everywhere.",
"There is a gas cooking stove in a rustic kitchen.",
"INTERIOR -",
"ELSEWHERE IN RANCH HOUSE - DAY The PUPPY runs through the house.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE KITCHEN - DAY MARIE-NOEL continues her search, we see a crude sleeping area, an office, a couch and a fireplace.",
"She is a visitor.",
"She lives out of suitcases.",
"VIEW on DOOR",
"The PUPPY runs out the door and BRENDA follows.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL continues her search in the dining room.",
"She looks under the table, on the mantle.",
"EXTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DOORSTEP EUGENE enters the house with a heavy step.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL continues her search in TONY's office.",
"She sits down a desk and rummages through it.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY EUGENE walks through the house.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL can't find what she is looking for on the messy writing desk, or in the drawers.",
"She HEARS a CAR HORN and bolts out of frame.",
"INTERIOR - KITCHEN - DAY MARIE-NOEL runs into the kitchen and sees the sheep.",
"MARIE-NOEL Where have you been.",
"He's here.",
"MARIE-NOEL opens the door for TONY who is still wearing his suit and carries food in a cardboard box.",
"The sheep looks up at him.",
"He turns to MARIE-NOEL and hands her a dress box.",
"MARIE-NOEL Dresses?",
"TONY More in the boat.",
"MARIE-NOEL Books?",
"TONY Likewise.",
"MARIE-NOEL How was LA?",
"TONY A dry hole.",
"EXTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY EUGENE runs away from the house.",
"INTERIOR - KITCHEN - DAY Tony sits down and stacks packages of Pop Tarts in front of him.",
"He opens a package and starts eating voraciously.",
"The sheep is standing next to him and he strokes it.",
"MARIE-NOEL sits down and starts reading the LA TIMES.",
"She looks up.",
"MARIE-NOEL Why did you let the animals go?",
"Here's a story about animals that caused erosion on the Channel Islands.",
"We don't need any more attention right now.",
"TONY I scattered them for their own protection.",
"And it doesn't bother me because any animal, no matter where it starts, turns out the same.",
"TONY eats pop tarts.",
"MARIE-NOEL Do you remember seeing my moon earrings anywhere have you?",
"TONY The ones you were wearing the night .....",
"MARIE-NOEL The night of the great unpleasantness?",
"MARIE-NOEL gets up and starts looking for something in the kitchen drawer.",
"TONY sees War and Peace on the kitchen table.",
"TONY Is there anything about Halloween in Edgar Allen Poe?",
"MARIE-NOEL sits up and stops the conversation.",
"MUSIC Starts: Heavy Rock",
"FLASH BACK: Halloween Concert.",
"VIEW on audience Dancing..",
"The show on stage..Image of death..",
"View on Sheep in fog.",
"MUSIC Stops",
"MARIE-NOEL OK, let's just stop talking about it....",
"TONY I guess it's about time.",
"It was starting to bug me.",
"VIEW ON MARIE-NOEL",
"She thinks about the night they lost MARIE-CHRISTINE.",
"MUSIC:",
"Bach Unaccompanied Cello Suites - Suite #2 Prelude S 1008",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) 20 November, the mirror never reflects my despair, just water running in the sink.",
"MUSIC STOPS",
"VIEW on TONY'S hands opening up pop tarts.",
"TONY looks at her.",
"TONY You can stop living out of suitcases and fix the place up?",
"MARIE-NOEL Oh, and you can go and enjoy your life in LA.",
"TONY What's that supposed to mean?",
"MARIE-NOEL You get to come and go as you please",
"and I'm stuck here in this dirty hideout.",
"TONY I'm in the same situation you are.",
"Moving or sitting still is the same thing, they're everywhere.",
"MARIE-NOEL",
"What about the government?",
"TONY I think we can stall the government until the next gubernatorial election.",
"MARIE-NOEL Forget it.",
"She thinks about herself and her own dilemma.",
"MUSIC:",
"Bach Unaccompanied Cello Suites - Suite #2 Prelude S 1008",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.)",
"If my dilemma is the dilemma of art, what would the art character do?",
"MUSIC STOPS",
"MARIE-NOEL starts looking under books.",
"TONY If anything happens to me you should take the train East...",
"TONY points East.",
"TONY ...",
"We both came from the West.",
"I think we'll be heading that way.",
"MARIE-NOEL Well, you'll be all set up in LA if anything happens to me.",
"He pauses and doesn't answer right away.",
"TONY We've had a good life.",
"We've been lucky.",
"All these extra years are for stories.",
"There's nothing left to do except to see how we fit into them.",
"MARIE-NOEL becomes silent and distracted, digging in a drawer.",
"MARIE-NOEL You know, I've looked everywhere.",
"There are no references to two people leaving a Halloween party anywhere in Western, Eastern, Sumerian, or comic book literature.",
"TONY I thought we were going to drop that.",
"MARIE-NOEL What was your mother's favorite book?",
"TONY How should I know?",
"MARIE-NOEL We both should have written these things down.",
"That's why I have a diary now.",
"MARIE-NOEL looks at TONY in the eye.",
"TONY You'll know what to do when the time comes.",
"MARIE-NOEL I protest in advance any role where I am resolved as ineffective, irrelevant, marginal, unable to influence, yet always influenced and, in short, any role where I am victimized by circumstance.",
"These are my politics and someone's going to have to deal with them.",
"TONY Good.",
"EXTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY",
"The house stands in the afternoon light.",
"MUSIC: Ravel String Quartet in F",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL sits at the writing desk.",
"Light and a warm breeze comes in the window.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) 16, November.",
"You asked me to remember the time before I came here.",
"I remember a shipwreck and a storm that washed out all the roads.",
"INTERIOR - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NOEL stands at the doorway in a beautiful dress, eyes closed.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.)",
"I remember a dream from my childhood.",
"In the dream a prince comes from the sea...",
"EXTERIOR - PIER - DAY TONY walk toward his boat.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) ...and lives with me and my old father.",
"There was England,..",
"INTERIOR - OLD MINING CAMP - DAY MARIE-NOEL writes in her diary on an old sink.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O.) ...back stage with my mother all those years while I grew so slowly.",
"France, India...",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND - DAY TONY'S boat steams out to sea.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O) French Indochina...",
"VIEW of OCEAN with Cacti.",
"MARIE-NOEL (V.O) then here...beside the arbitrary sea.",
"MUSIC:",
"Vierne: Finale from Symphony #1",
"EXTERIOR - MOUNTAINSIDE - DAY BRENDA tries to catch the puppy but it gets away from her.",
"She realizes she has been tricked and stands up, angry at ZEUS.",
"We start to PAN and cut to..",
"INTERIOR - RESTROOM IN AVALON - DAY",
"BRENDA has same expression looking in a mirror.",
"She realizes that something is wrong.",
"She sees that her fingernails are painted dark red, her hair is puffed out and frightful, she has dark makeup on lips and eyes.",
"She tries to remove the makeup and nail polish and pull herself together.",
"She realizes that she is in the Men's room.",
"EXTERIOR - AVALON - DAY BRENDA, having corrected herself, walks toward the boat going back to the mainland.",
"EXTERIOR - ANOTHER PART OF THE HARBOR - DAY REGGIE stands forgotten at the end of the dock, surrounded by a very floral luggage.",
"MUSIC: BACH Toccata in D major",
"TITLE: \"2 Years later\"",
"MUSIC:",
"Bach Toccata in D Major",
"TITLE: \"2 Years later\"",
"EXTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY Morning light.",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY ALLEN asleep on couch.",
"He has gained 50 pounds.",
"There are empty beer cans and empty pizza boxes on the floor.",
"A WOMAN unlocks the door and we follow her into the apartment.",
"She is tired from a business trip.",
"She sees ALLEN.",
"WOMAN What are you doing in my apartment?",
"What are you doing here?",
"ALLEN wakes up, startled, rubbing his eyes.",
"WOMAN And who's pizza is this?",
"Excuse me!",
"ALLEN Calm down.",
"We weren't expecting you for a while, we had the exterminator come in like you requested...",
"WOMAN Oh you did?",
"H. TOM appears from the next room, groggy.",
"WOMAN And who the hell is this?",
"ALLEN (aside to H. TOM) Take this stuff out for her.",
"H. TOM starts frantically collecting the garbage.",
"WOMAN You've got pizza in my place...you're lying here.",
"Who's clothes are these?",
"ALLEN picks up his bag of things.",
"H. TOM finishes his cleanup.",
"ALLEN There's no pizza here; there's no clothes here.",
"WOMAN You had no permission to come into my place.",
"A guy sleeping in my bedroom, sleeping on my couch.",
"ALLEN I'm going to request to the board that you perhaps should be kicked out for your bad sculpture.",
"ALLEN and H. TOM exit.",
"WOMAN Oh you are?",
"Get the hell out of here.",
"What kind of manager are you anyway?",
"The WOMAN slams the door and shakes her head in amazement.",
"MUSIC:",
"Arne Mellnas Transparence",
"EXTERIOR - AUNT DEBBIE'S HOUSE - DAY",
"A green cab pulls up in front of a garish Encino home.",
"JULIENNE gets out, dressed plainly, with one suitcase.",
"The cab leaves and she gives a skeptical once over to the house.",
"She is about to begin her new life.",
"Is this it?",
"She walks up the pathway to the door and notices a great quantity of mushrooms growing on the front lawn.",
"She steps over the flowers, kneels down and picks up one of the mushrooms.",
"She looks at it and wonders.",
"VIEW of SUN A partial eclipse is in progress.",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD - DAY We see AUNT DEBBIE taking her daily constitutional on Hollywood Blvd.",
"She is wearing a blue and white terry cloth jump suit and tennis shoes.",
"She is fast walking through obstacles before her on the sidewalk.",
"She is a determined and physically fit 65 year old.",
"MUSIC:",
"Dvorzak Cello Concerto in B minor op 104",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY The camera pans from AUNT DEBBIE to ALLEN to H. TOM who all converge at the same street corner.",
"ALLEN Hi, Aunt Debbie?",
"AUNT DEBBIE",
"What's that on your face?",
"ALLEN fingers his unshaven face.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Did you move that refrigerator to my new building?",
"ALLEN Yes.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Liar.",
"Your car doesn't work.",
"FLASHBACK: ALLEN and H. TOM stand next to ALLEN'S broken down car.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Who's this?",
"H. TOM I'm his assistant ma'am.",
"ALLEN Shut up!",
"FLASHBACK: H. TOM shaves in a park fountain surrounded by homeless people.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Does he pay rent?",
"H. TOM No ma'am.",
"When I find a job I'm going to pay rent.",
"ALLEN He picks up my residual checks and he's a really good plumber.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Did you steal another car from a tourist?",
"FLASHBACK: Two JAPANESE tourists admire a star on Hollywood Blvd.",
"as ALLEN and H. TOM make off with their car.",
"H. TOM No ma'am.",
"ALLEN Shut up!",
"(to AUNT DEBBIE)",
"No we didn't.",
"AUNT DEBBIE That refrigerator, did you strap it on top of the car?",
"FLASHBACK:",
"The stolen car rolls through and intersection with the refrigerator strapped to the top.",
"ALLEN No!",
"AUNT DEBBIE",
"And then did you ditch their car?",
"FLASHBACK: From above, ALLEN and H. TOM remove the refrigerator from the top of the rental car.",
"H. TOM No ma'am.",
"The car was towed...",
"ALLEN Shut up!",
"ALLEN pushes H. TOM.",
"AUNT DEBBIE",
"So you faked homelessness and begged for free chicken.",
"FLASHBACK: ALLEN and H. TOM stand at the window of a fast food stand faking homelessness.",
"ALLEN has Will Work For Food written on his stomach.",
"ALLEN What are you saying Aunt Debbie?",
"AUNT DEBBIE The refrigerator is all scraped up and has no freon.",
"And you smell rancid.",
"And why are you so fat!",
"AUNT DEBBIE exits, ALLEN knows she is not finished and counts..",
"ALLEN One, two, three..",
"AUNT DEBBIE Your cousin just arrived.",
"When you see her, be sociable!",
"DEBBIE finally exits.",
"ALLEN You know I've been having these dreams lately where my mother finds me floating down the river in a little wicker basket and it turns out that (shouts in the direction of AUNT DEBBIE)",
"I am not related to you!",
"MUSIC: JOHN ADAMS",
"\"Fearful Symmetries\"",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY TONY continues his search, flipping a coin to indicate the direction he should search.",
"He tires of this and turns around, walking aimless around LA.",
"EXTERIOR - BUS BENCH - DAY TONY sits on a bench talking to several people.",
"They are annoyed and walk away.",
"A weird man with an odd head dress sits next to TONY.",
"Tony gets up and leaves.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY TONY walks off and walks into a line of workers carrying 2x4s.",
"He ducks and almost gets decapitated, takes refuge at a bus bench.",
"A MUSICIAN is sitting on the far end of the bus bench reading.",
"TONY Do you have the time?",
"MUSICIAN 2:30.",
"TONY Do you mind if I ask you a question?",
"MUSICIAN Yes.",
"TONY Why are you her right now?",
"MUSICIAN What?",
"TONY Why did you come up just this minute?",
"MUSICIAN I'm going to work, man.",
"TONY Is this the bus you always take?",
"MUSICIAN No, I'm late.",
"TONY You're late!",
"Why are you late?",
"MUSICIAN I overslept, man.",
"TONY Nothing caused you to be late?",
"MUSICIAN I'm just sitting here waiting for the bus.",
"What's the big deal?",
"Do you have to talk to me?",
"THE MUSICIAN gets up in frustration and leaves.",
"Tony exits frame in foreground.",
"A runaway car careens into the bench going backwards and destroys the bench where they just sat.",
"VIEW A Tire rolls up the hill propelled by the crash.",
"TONY and the man re-enter frame.",
"EXTERIOR - BUS BENCH - AS BEFORE The car has a roof rack with a bike on it.",
"A man runs up the car holding a bicycle tire.",
"TONY and the man look at the damage.",
"The man despairs.",
"CAR MAN",
"Oh my god!",
"I can't fucking believe this!",
"My car must have popped out of park!",
"It could have hit you.",
"Oh my god, I can't believe this...800 bucks...",
"Oh my god!",
"TONY runs in Panic.",
"MUSIC: Guy Klucevsek \"Reprieve\"",
"VIEW ON TONY The tire does not fall from its own weight, it starts rolling back down the hill.",
"CAR MAN Call 911!",
"EXTERIOR - STREET - DAY TONY runs down the street and notices that the wheel starts chasing him.",
"TONY runs down the hill trying to escape from the runaway tire.",
"VIEW ON TONY Looking inside the Truck.",
"Camera follows TONY in.",
"He looks back in terror.",
"TONY'S POV the tire gains on the truck..",
"SEQUENCE:",
"The Truck stops for a cat.",
"The doors shut.",
"The light crosses Tony's face and goes black.",
"SFX Doors lock THE Rolling tire innocently hits the truck and gets stuck.",
"A purring cat walks away from the truck.",
"MUSIC: Guy Klucevsek \"Loosening up the Queen\"",
"EXTERIOR - DOWNTOWN LA - DAY TRUCK moves along freeway headed across town.",
"EXTERIOR - PARK - DAY ALLEN and H. TOM sit eating their \"begged for\" chicken.",
"ALLEN I have a genius IQ.",
"My parents would have killed if I went into business.",
"They'd love it.",
"MUSIC:",
"Bach Suite #2 S. 1008",
"ALLEN",
"If they were alive, you know what I'd tell them?",
"I'd tell them I'm a temp in an insurance company.",
"H. TOM If you assign everything to infantile motives, life becomes boring.",
"Your religion only explains your sex life.",
"ALLEN You're not listening.",
"I don't want to be poor.",
"But it's not like I'm doing some I gotta starve thing here.",
"If I had enough money I'd be happy.",
"H. TOM And then again you may be right, for all the wrong reasons.",
"Twenty years in the mind is unfortunately not twenty years in the body and it get worse and worse as you go.",
"ALLEN Not me.",
"I keep my nut real low.",
"Basically I live off my relatives.",
"You know?",
"Free rent.",
"All the chicks I can pluck from my aunt's building.",
"All I need is one national commercial a year and I can live like a king.",
"H. TOM Things are stranger in other places.",
"ALLEN Where do you get these things you say, man.",
"Are you still on acid?",
"H. TOM I just say things that come into my head, because they're more enjoyable than my own thoughts.",
"We pull back to reveal ALLEN and H. TOM eating lunch under a monument to the F-104.",
"EXTERIOR - AUNT DEBBIE'S BACKYARD - DAY JULIENNE is sitting at a table in the sun, balancing her check book.",
"She notices that the amount of one check, #1527, is the same as the number of the check.",
"MUSIC: Tahitian choir Segue to:",
"MUSIC: A. Corelli Concerto VII Segue to:",
"MUSIC:",
"Prokofiev Romeo and Juliette",
"JULIENNE looks up and Aunt DEBBIE passes in front of her.",
"JULIENNE There's two choices for me right now.",
"I'm either pregnant or feeling a false pregnancy.",
"The first one is impossible.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Are you trying to tell your mother that you're knocked up?",
"JULIENNE Incredible weather we're having.",
"AUNT DEBBIE I hate it because it makes my skin dry, especially my private parts.",
"JULIENNE In Maine, it's been frozen for two months.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Why are you here anyway?",
"JULIENNE To take care of you.",
"I thought that giving it all up and taking care of my old mother would be the simplest life possible.",
"What you're telling me about my cousin Allen is upsetting.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Criminy....You sure feel sorry for yourself.",
"JULIENNE Damn right!",
"I didn't come here to get drawn into slum-lording.",
"What did you get into mom?",
"AUNT DEBBIE likes to change the subject mid sentence, and wander freely the world of denigration.",
"AUNT DEBBIE My dear husband, bless his soul THE BASTARD.(with a twinkle in her eye)",
"He was very good to me..",
"JULIENNE You always said that.....",
"AUNT DEBBIE It was my idea, not his!",
"Now you're cousin",
"Allen is the bastard.",
"JULIENNE Look mom, I came out here because I needed to.",
"I've went through a time with so many regrets.",
"I got ostentatious and solemn",
"and I hated myself, and anyone who behaved the same way.",
"Independence works better alone.",
"I'm a girl Shane, you know the gunfighter who hung up his guns.",
"AUNT DEBBIE You didn't give them enough sex, that's your own fault.",
"JULIENNE Too many people in my past have been hurt, and all of them named Tony.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Have you seen all these mushrooms around the house?",
"JULIENNE Fato Profungus...",
"I believe they're called.",
"AUNT DEBBIE You would know that.",
"But don't eat them.",
"Mrs. Johnson up the street says they make you horny.",
"And when are you going to learn to drive?",
"JULIENNE Probably never.",
"I like walking.",
"EXTERIOR - THE VALLEY - DAY JULIENNE walks along Ventura Blvd.",
"looking at store fronts.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY TONY walks in garment district.",
"EXTERIOR - THE VALLEYDAY JULIENNE walks along the street in front of a home with a motor home parked in front of it.",
"EXTERIOR - ANOTHER PART OF LA TONY walks on Hollywood Blvd., looking for clues in people's faces.",
"MUSIC: Guy Klucevsek \"Blue Window\"",
"EXTERIOR - FOREST LAWN - DAY We pull back from a \"help wanted\" sign as the truck pulls into the driveway of the cemetery.",
"EXTERIOR - MORTUARY - DAY Two guys open the back of the truck and we see TONY standing in a trance in the back of the truck.",
"INTERIOR - MORTUARY OFFICE - DAY",
"The MORTICIAN sits down at his desk to interview TONY.",
"MORTICIAN And what qualifies you for this job?",
"TONY Well, what is the job?",
"MORTICIAN State privacy laws require that we watch over our guests day and night from the minute they arrive to the day of the funeral.",
"TONY You mean the bodies?",
"MORTICIAN",
"Yes.",
"You're the body watcher.",
"TONY Oh.",
"The body watcher.",
"MORTICIAN Well, do you have any questions?",
"TONY Oh, no.",
"MORTICIAN I have a few questions, if you don't mind.",
"TONY Okay.",
"MORTICIAN For example, why do you want this job?",
"TONY I want to meet people.",
"MORTICIAN Dead people?",
"TONY No, no.",
"If I work at night I'll meet people during the day.",
"See, I don't sleep much at night.",
"MORTICIAN You have two lives?",
"I have two lives.",
"I've always wanted to be a stand up comic.",
"Do you mind if I show you some of my material?",
"TONY Go ahead.",
"MORTICIAN A man says to his doctor he can't remember things from one minute to the next the doctor says, \"How long has this been going on?\"",
"The man says, \"How long has what been going on?\"",
"TONY laughs.",
"TONY That's good.",
"INTERIOR - MORGUE - NIGHT TONY reads.",
"MUSIC: \"Frascilita\" from Lisa Germano \"Geek the Girl\"",
"Several angles.",
"TIME PASSES.",
"VIEW ON",
"CLOCK 12 Midnight.",
"2 AM.",
"4 AM.",
"TONY puts down the book and opens a refrigerator door and slides out a body.",
"The body is in a bag.",
"He lifts the body onto a cart and rolls it under a light.",
"He zips open the bag and looks inside.",
"He raises a pale arm of the dead person and the arm slowly falls out of frame.",
"TONY looks for a knife on the work table and looks at the first knife, it is too small.",
"The picks up a second knife, it is too large.",
"He reaches for a third knife, just right.",
"He takes a deep breath and starts sawing open the dead body.",
"EXTERIOR - MORTUARY - NIGHT",
"The MORTICIAN hurries to the door of the MORTUARY having forgotten something at work.",
"INTERIOR - MORGUE - NIGHT When he has the stomach open he puts down the knife and scoops up the entrails of the dead body with two hands and holds them up in front of the camera.",
"He saws the entrails loose and throws them on to the floor.",
"The entrails splatter on the cold tiles.",
"TONY kneels over to examine them.",
"VIEW on door.",
"The Mortician comes through the door, sees what TONY is doing and is shocked.",
"MUSIC STOPS",
"MORTICIAN What are you doing?",
"You depraved person!",
"Is that a client?",
"Get out of here!",
"TONY Number 12.",
"MORTICIAN Mr. Peterson?",
"TONY I dunno...Not yet.",
"I see something here!",
"MORTICIAN I don't care what you see.",
"Get out.",
"TONY Leaves.",
"The MORTICIAN looks at the mess, horrified.",
"EXTERIOR - THE VALLEY - NIGHT JULIENNE walks past a drug store and decides to go in.",
"SOURCE MUSIC: \"Green Tambourine\" the Lemon Pipers",
"INTERIOR - PHARMACY - NIGHT PAN is reading a pornographic magazine.",
"He is tapped on the shoulder by HERMES, a young man with a light beard.",
"PAN Oh hi.",
"HERMES We need to talk.",
"PAN OK.",
"JULIENNE enters the frame and starts up an aisle.",
"IN ANOTHER PART OF THE STORE:",
"PAN I've been living quietly by myself, except for the moon-light orgies and me scoring twice a day.",
"HERMES Dad wants to talk to you...because you're family.",
"PAN Hermes, I'll pay you if you get me back into the organization.",
"I've got this new pornography you have to see...",
"HERMES directs PAN'S attention toward TONY, who appears behind them.",
"TONY heads down the same aisle as JULIENNE.",
"HERMES smiles.",
"VIEW ON TONY",
"PAN His mother was Jefferson's mistress.",
"HERMES We should help him.",
"PAN No.",
"EROS, a small child with a toy bow and arrow, shoots an arrow at JULIENNE.",
"It hits her and she picks it up.",
"She looks around and does not see where it came from.",
"PAN He lives on my island.",
"There will always be as many demigods as there are minor poets.",
"There are too many of them.",
"They have good lives.",
"They don't need any help.",
"TONY approaches JULIENNE.",
"JULIENNE approaches TONY.",
"She sees TONY and smiles.",
"JULIENNE God I have a headache.",
"Do you know the best thing for headaches?",
"TONY Is that why you came here just now?",
"JULIENNE ...most people go to the vegetable section, I come here because I believe in headaches....",
"Men who are worth anything always have headaches..",
"JULIENNE pauses, a little embarrassed.",
"A WOMAN comes up behind them but does not pay any attention to them.",
"TONY I walk to get rid of my headaches....",
"JULIENNE I thought so.",
"Everything's OK here as long as you're name isn't Tony.",
"TONY OK.",
"VIEW on PAN and HERMES",
"PAN Should we screw things up?",
"VIEW on TONY and JULIENNE",
"JULIENNE It's a challenge life put before me overcoming my Tony Karma.",
"Men want blonds and good breasts.",
"Women with breasts always do well.",
"They also like tomboys.",
"They trust tomboys.",
"They consider them honorable and would never have sex with them unless the tomboy asked?",
"VIEW on PAN and HERMES",
"HERMES No, don't.",
"PAN yells at the top of his lungs.",
"HERMES is thrown backward into a closet.",
"VIEW on Gas coming from a broken pipe.",
"INTERIOR VIEW ON TONY AND JULIENNE",
"WE HEAR an alarm.",
"A WOMAN comes up to TONY in a state of fright.",
"WOMAN There's gas leaking.",
"Get out.",
"TONY starts to run out of the store pulling JULIENNE by the hand.",
"He looks back and sees a FRAIL OLD WOMAN who does not understand the danger.",
"TONY wants to go back.",
"TONY (to JULIENNE)",
"I'll meet you outside.",
"TONY goes back to help the old WOMAN.",
"TONY Come on.",
"there's a gas leak.",
"TONY tries to pull her.",
"OLD WOMAN Don't touch me...Manager!",
"EXTERIOR - STORE - NIGHT The store explodes and burns.",
"EXTERIOR - STORE - NIGHT JULIENNE interviewed in front of the STORE by a camera crew.",
"Flaming store behind.",
"JULIENNE A nice young man pulled me out and then went back in to save someone..and then there was this explosion",
"INTERIOR - DEBBIE'S HOUSE - NIGHT ALLEN and H. TOM are listening to the broadcast.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Why don't you get a temp job.",
"I can't pay you any more money.",
"The Phone RINGS.",
"ALLEN answers the phone.",
"ALLEN Hello (to AUNT DEBBIE)",
"Do you know a Tony.",
"AUNT DEBBIE Wrong number.",
"They keep asking for TONY.",
"Look it's your cousin!",
"VIEW ON TELEVISION",
"JULIENNE Then the store blew up.",
"DEBBIE She could have died.",
"ALLEN Holy shit, that's my cousin?",
"EXTERIOR - DOWNTOWN - DAY TONY walks down a street shaking an aerosol can.",
"MUSIC:",
"Johann Sebastian Bach - Double Concerto for 2 Violins BWV 1043, Largo Ma Non Tanto",
"He stops at a corner, shakes the can, and starts spraying silly string into the street.",
"As he does this, WE HEAR: a car alarm go off across the street.",
"WE SEE a black range rover.",
"TONY raises the can to spray again and sprays.",
"The can emits a squiggly spray and the sound from the car across the street matches the silly string's oscillations.",
"TONY puts the can down in astonishment.",
"MUSIC: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart - Concerto for Piano & Orchestra #20 KV 466",
"EUGENE stops and watches TONY.",
"TONY looks at EUGENE and slides away from his dangerous gaze.",
"EXTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY Two men walk up to a black Range Rover then turn and walk toward ALLEN'S building.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY",
"The wind blows.",
"A tree falls.",
"As it falls its branches brush on a street sign for GREENTREE ST.",
"The sign become GRAINTREE.",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S APARTMENT - DAY ALLEN paces.",
"ALLEN HEARS a knock at the door.",
"ALLEN goes to the door.",
"Two THUGS burst in, push ALLEN to the floor, gun to his head.",
"SON Where's the money Greg?",
"ALLEN My name isn't Greg, My name is Allen.",
"FATHER Maybe he isn't Greg.",
"They said he was a big guy.",
"SON Where's the money Greg?",
"ALLEN I don't know what you're talking about.",
"SON Are you allergic to pain?",
"SON Pulls out a gun.",
"SON Where is the money Greg?",
"FATHER What's with the gun?",
"I said no guns?",
"ALLEN Take my wallet on the coffee table.",
"There's $1200 in rent receipts in the kitchen drawer!",
"SON Is that your black Range Rover parked outside?",
"ALLEN I don't have any black Range Rover.",
"FATHER Is this 6600 Graintree?",
"ALLEN Greentree!",
"SON What?",
"ALLEN Greentree!",
"SON Let's pop him.",
"He knows a lot now.",
"FATHER Come on.",
"He doesn't know anything.",
"SON (Aims gun)",
"FATHER Come on.",
"We're sorry.",
"Have a good day.",
"FATHER pulls SON away and they leave, ALLEN gets up.",
"ALLEN You guys do sloppy work.",
"A desk lamp and the light bulb pops.",
"It startles him.",
"EXTERIOR -",
"THE BIG ISLAND - DAY Ominous clouds cast shadow on roily sea.",
"MUSIC:",
"Brian Eno - ANOTHER GREEN WORLD \"Spirits Drifting\"",
"EXTERIOR - SKY - DAY Clouds part and light shines through.",
"RADIO The New York Daily news says.. 1200 people",
"INTERIOR PATIO - RANCH HOUSE - DAY MARIE-NØEL listens to the radio.",
"She is wearing a black wig.",
"She applies lipstick.",
"RADIO Will be returned.. tomorrow..because you blew it...",
"You're absolutely right..",
"ANGLE ON RADIO MARIE-NØEL is turning the dial randomly.",
"RADIO",
"And what's going to happen?..to the personality of your dog...and don't forget..our children's future..please.. because forces will gather... to take you away...",
"CLOSE UP ON MARIE-NØEL She hears something she thinks is interesting.",
"RADIO ...from the island.",
"Then the radio becomes unintelligible.",
"She turns the dial and only hears static.",
"WE HEAR Phone ringing.",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S ROOM - DAY ALLEN sits in his easy chair and answers the phone.",
"ALLEN Hello?",
"Wouldn't you know it, the phone doesn't ring all day",
"and it's you.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY VIEW on Rain clouds above sunny houses on Highland Blvd.",
"RADIO Matrix lactating....",
"ALLEN You notice something on the way home..",
"EXTERIOR - DOWNTOWN LA - DAY TONY walks along the street flipping a coin.",
"RADIO ...",
"Etched droplets.",
"ALLEN Convertible with young bleach blond, mom in back...",
"EXTERIOR - THE VALLEY - DAY Julienne walks on Ventura Blvd.",
"ALLEN ..mom in back...",
"ANGLE ON MARIE-NØEL",
"She dabs he finger into the color purple on her color palette.",
"RADIO Heroic mall facing darlings..",
"Hasty Scotch preceding flick...",
"ANGLE ON ALLEN",
"ALLEN Young dad with ponytail driving, baby shotgun, back from beach...",
"VIEW on SUN going behind clouds.",
"RADIO Normal cantilever...",
"VIEW on OCEAN.",
"RADIO ...short of awe...",
"VIEW on ALLEN sitting in a curb at night, headlights blind him.",
"ALLEN (V.O.) Give style to Sunset Blvd.",
"VIEW on MARIE NOEL.",
"She dabs makeup and makes a mess.",
"l'art sans past...",
"VIEW on old man walking his cat in the Wilshire district.",
"ALLEN (V.O.)",
"At sunset the cars move home one by one..",
"RADIO ...finding freckles...",
"VIEW on JULIENNE walking on Ventura Blvd.",
"ALLEN (V.O.)",
"And the stages float to meet the warm light",
"VIEW on TONY walking on Downtown.",
"RADIO talented...heady slap...",
"ALLEN (V.O.)",
"My time is mine again.",
"VIEW on ALLEN drinking glass of water on his balcony.",
"RADIO slap, talented, heady...",
"MUSIC: Ludwig van Beethoven - Piano Concerto #8 in C minor, Op. 13 \"Pathetique\"",
"VIEW on ALLEN rapidly wiggling his eyebrows.",
"HIGH shot of San Miguel Island.",
"MUSIC:",
"Brian Eno - ANOTHER GREEN WORLD \"Spirits Drifting\"",
"RADIO ...breaks on not finding form...",
"VIEW on MARIE-NØEL applying color to her eyes from color palette.",
"RADIO ditched glue...laughter pulling Orion...Wrist on loan...",
"TONY walking by tall poplars in the Valley on Mulholland drive.",
"RADIO ...bowed to & clean...",
"VIEW on mountain field of flowers.",
"VIEW on Plane in landing pattern.",
"VIEW on TONY's POV walking on Melrose.",
"VIEW on ALLEN hanging up the phone.",
"VIEW on MARIE-NØEL putting on her makeup faster.",
"VIEW on earthquake damaged buildings.",
"VIEW on 3 people coming out of doors simultaneously.",
"RADIO secret cycled from...the obvious...lodged style hawked from home...searing material lush as trash...",
"VIEW of the THIELE twins",
"MUSIC: Ludwig van Beethoven - Piano Concerto #8 in C minor, Op. 13 \"Pathetique\"",
"VIEW on MN putting on her makeup faster, and faster till it is an even bigger mess.",
"VIEW of Downtown LA in a windstorm.",
"VIEW of the Santa Monica Bay at sunrise.",
"RADIO feet lifting heavy ball...to shoulder in backward world...lovely cart...lucky... faucet of distant lakes...bad swath forever poor...",
"MARIE-NØEL pulls off her black wig.",
"She looks off camera as if she hears something.",
"EXTERIOR - LA - MORNING Close on pre-sunrise LA.",
"Earthquake shakes the buildings as sun rises.",
"WE HEAR the sound of a HELICOPTER.",
"VIEW on LA.",
"A moon rises in eclipse.",
"MUSIC:",
"Haydn String Quartet Op 76, Allegro con Spirito",
"EXTERIOR - LA STREET - NIGHT Two cars pass in the night going opposite directions.",
"MUSIC: Haydn - String Quartet: \"Sunrise\"",
"EXTERIOR - LA GOOGIE RESTAURANT - NIGHT TONY sits in an all night restaurant late at night.",
"He eats like a horse, 10 entrees in front of him.",
"WE HEAR: A jet landing",
"MUSIC: Identify",
"TONY looks out the window and sees a total eclipse of the moon.",
"VIEW ON JET LANDING VIEW ON LANDING LIGHTS ON WATER",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD STREET - NIGHT TONY walk along the sidewalk in the middle of the night.",
"EUGENE stops TONY.",
"TONY avoids him, but EUGENE heads him off.",
"MUSIC:?",
"EUGENE Have a light?",
"TONY I don't smoke.",
"Eugene, standing in front of TONY, searches in his pockets and finds a lighter, then a book and then some string.",
"TONY looks at the EUGENE 's face and eyes.",
"EUGENE hands TONY the book.",
"TONY looks at the book then EUGENE finds a cigarette.",
"The lighter won't light.",
"The man realizes he is imposing on TONY and tries to get the book back while holding the cigarette in his hand.",
"EUGENE gives TONY the lighter and takes back the book.",
"The priority is his smoking triumphs and TONY ends up lighting him up.",
"The lighter shoots up in a big flame to TONY'S surprise.",
"TONY can't turn off the lighter.",
"There is a power outage.....",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD - NIGHT A power outage darkens a large rectangle in the middle of a grid of city lights.",
"SOUND:",
"Car alarms, house alarms",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD STREET - NIGHT CAMERA drifts to TONY'S face.",
"EUGENE grabs the LIGHTER from TONY and walks off into the dark.",
"MUSIC:",
"Johann Sebastian Bach - Suite #25 in A minor",
"EXTERIOR - SAME POSITION - DAY Rain streaks from TONY'S face.",
"TONY is same standing position as night before.",
"Men wearing suits like TONY'S are standing at the door.",
"It is raining.",
"The camera pushes in and TONY comes to.",
"The door opens and the actors go in after applauding for TONY, thinking that he is a living statue.",
"TONY follows them in the door.",
"We see a sign that says \"Casting.\"",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD - DAY ALLEN walks in a hurry down a Hollywood street.",
"BARRY, ALLEN'S AGENT, gets out of his car and approaches ALLEN.",
"ALLEN Hey Barry, what are you doing here?",
"BARRY I'm going to see my daughter's dance class.",
"Aren't I allowed to have a life?",
"ALLEN",
"That's fine You never see your agent anywhere.",
"It's kind of weird.",
"BARRY I've heard that before.",
"ALLEN gives AGENT a thirsty look.",
"BARRY Do you want this?",
"BARRY hands ALLEN a Coke.",
"BARRY 16 table spoons of sugar.",
"Fat is funny.",
"Better you than me.",
"ALLEN Did you wipe it?",
"ALLEN burps.",
"BARRY I always knew you were a very talented man.",
"ALLEN You know Barry, when I was growing up in Maine my neighbors would say: Oh you're going to Hollywood to be a star, Huh, That was pretty embarrassing, wouldn't you say?",
"You're just like them.",
"BARRY",
"What?",
"Moi?",
"ALLEN It wasn't very nice.",
"BARRY What haven't I done for you lately",
"ALLEN You're always so fucking condescending.",
"BARRY",
"What are you talking condescending, what are you saying?",
"ALLEN leaves frame, BARRY follows.",
"EXTERIOR - CASTING BUILDING - DAY There is a thunder clap and TONY and BARRY run for cover.",
"BARRY starts going in the door.",
"BARRY See you Allen.",
"Aren't you going in the actor's entrance?",
"ALLEN They always bring us in the back door here",
"but I'm going in the front today.",
"INTERIOR - LOBBY - DAY ALLEN and BARRY enter the lobby of the building.",
"ALLEN You know I've added up all the time my commercials have run on television and I'm already way done with my 15 minutes of fame.",
"ALLEN starts to get into the elevator.",
"BARRY Should I take that personally?",
"ALLEN Take it how ever you'd like.",
"BARRY You know what?",
"I'm going to take the steps.",
"I don't feel comfortable in this elevator.",
"ALLEN Is this about me?",
"BARRY No.",
"I just don't like elevators.",
"You know what and elevator is.",
"It's a coffin.",
"If it ever stops.",
"Did you know that?",
"The cables are weak, and it stops, there's no air.",
"ALLEN Barry!",
"BARRY",
"If there was an earthquake you know what would happen?",
"ALLEN Barry!",
"BARRY ...you'd be dead.",
"ALLEN Barry!",
"BARRY I'd rather walk and have thighs.",
"ALLEN Barry!",
"ALLEN finally interrupts him and hands him back the Pepsi.",
"ALLEN I'll call you at the office later.",
"Oh oh oh!",
"I'm scared.",
"THE ELEVATOR DOOR closes.",
"INTERIOR - ELEVATOR - DAY",
"ALLEN teases BARRY one more time.",
"ALLEN opens the elevator door...",
"ALLEN Oh Barry, I almost forgot...",
"...and TONY standing at the door waiting to get in.",
"TONY enters and settles in for the ride.",
"ALLEN You're a pussy Barry.",
"(to TONY) Casting?",
"TONY Sure.",
"ALLEN reacts to TONY'S lack of determination.",
"The elevator starts to rise.",
"EFFECT: EARTHQUAKE",
"ALLEN",
"Oh my god it's a earthquake.",
"TONY It's all right.",
"ALLEN BARRY!!!!",
"TONY It'll be over soon.",
"ALLEN Are we under anything structural?",
"Get in a door jam.",
"ALLEN huddles next to TONY in the elevator door and the shaking increases.",
"ALLEN Do you smell gas?",
"The lights go on and off in the middle of the tumult.",
"TONY",
"What?",
"ALLEN We're going to die.",
"Barrrrrrry!",
"EXTERIOR - STREET - DAY Heavy chunks of plaster and brick hit the pavement.",
"ALLEN and TONY AAhhhhhhhh!",
"VIEW OF LOS ANGELES NEWS COVERAGE OF EARTHQUAKE: Damaged cars, freeways, collapsed apartments and parking structures, buckled freeways....",
"MUSIC:",
"Bocherini - Concerto in G Major",
"ANNOUNCER MONTAGE (v.o.) 6.6 officially if you have been sleeping all morning.",
"6.6 it was felt from San Diego to Las Vegas to Modesto.",
"It was centered exactly under in Northridge and it is a unnamed fault...",
"We are in Granada Hills and the power is still out...",
"Sadly there were three deaths reported in the Santa Clarita Valley area.",
"The force blew out storefront windows, there were landslides in Pacific Palisades left cars caked in mud.",
"Ruptured gas lines buckled the roads.",
"The Santa Monica freeway collapsed near La Cieniega.",
"An apartment complex on 14th and Idaho exploded.",
"One house toppled down a hill.",
"We tilt up from a collapsed storefront and see a partial eclipse of the sun.",
"EXTERIOR - HOLLYWOOD - DAY A HOMELESS WOMAN and her daughter stand in front of a boarded up storefront.",
"HOMELESS WOMAN After the earthquake was all over we went down to the lobby and sad down in the lobby of the building...",
"EXTERIOR - LA - DAY We see a building where a wall has fallen off exposing the contents of a hotel room...broken windows...fallen brick...cracks in walls...more fallen facades.",
"HOMELESS WOMAN ...until the sun came up.",
"And then we went off to our room to see if there was any damage, it was pretty bad.",
"It was quiet, there wasn't anybody driving, there were people just wandering around, you know we walked out and we looked and we saw the cracks.....",
"and you know down the street over here beside the building was off, a big bell tower up the street was tilted halfway down, it was sort of scary......",
"EXTERIOR - STREET - DAY",
"The camera DOLLIES past a damaged car in an alley.",
"We reach a door blocked by rubble.",
"TONY and ALLEN emerge.",
"HOMELESS WOMAN ...and you know down the street over here beside the building was off, a big bell tower up the street was tilted halfway down, it was sort of scary......",
"TONY What a beautiful day for an earthquake.",
"ALLEN I've go to check my building.",
"I've got to turn the gas off.",
"We don't have any earthquake kits.",
"Where's your car?",
"TONY I don't own a car.",
"I walk.",
"ALLEN You walk?",
"TONY",
"Yeah I walk.",
"ALLEN Where do you live?",
"TONY Out of town.",
"ALLEN Where out of town....like New York out of town, Texas out of town?",
"TONY A couple of hours out of town.",
"ALLEN Like Palm Springs out of town?",
"TONY Yeah, like Palm Springs out of town.",
"TONY walks away.",
"ALLEN",
"And you don't have a car?",
"MUSIC:",
"EXTERIOR - VINE STREET from above - DAY TONY and ALLEN their way across the road.",
"EXTERIOR - EARTHQUAKE DAMAGED STREET - DAY TONY and ALLEN walk along together and meet a DERANGED WOMAN.",
"She is very big and sexy.",
"But she is.",
"DERANGED WOMAN There's no love in the world!",
"I miss my friend more than any thing that's ever happened to me.",
"She had favorites of course.",
"She appraoches ALLEN.",
"The woman has become sexier talking to ALLEN.",
"TONY interrupts.",
"TONY This makes me happy to know.",
"We I have to go now.",
"DERANGED WOMAN You your self may know someone she liked.",
"She works ALLEN up.",
"TONY Loser.",
"You're such a loser.",
"You have terrible taste in clothes!",
"All your taste is in your friggin' mouth!",
"The woman flees.",
"ALLEN is amazed.",
"ALLEN What are you doing?",
"TONY You don't want to have anything to do with her.",
"ALLEN I beg to differ.",
"Is that tricycle listed.",
"This never happens to me during the day.",
"EXTERIORALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY People holding household items pass them.",
"People are moving out.",
"EXTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING WE HEAR Panic, chaos.",
"INTERIORALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY We pick up JULIENNE with a group of people moving things out.",
"One of them holds a ZEBRA HEAD.",
"JULIENNE comes from a storage room.",
"She is holding a nice lamp and a box of pictures.",
"JULIENNE forgets something and goes back.",
"A picture drops on the floor.",
"It is a picture of ALLEN and JULIENNE and AUNT DEBBIE",
"INTERIOR - ALLEN'S BUILDING - DAY ALLEN and TONY enter the building.",
"They work their way through the crowd in the hall toward ALLEN'S APARTMENT.",
"The tenants hold personal items.",
"They are angry at ALLEN.",
"ALLEN Why are you moving out?",
"FLEEING TENANT",
"This place is condemned.",
"No use of paying you any more rent.",
"ALLEN Don't think you're going to get your security deposit back.",
"ALLEN stops at his door and tries to open it.",
"It won't budge.",
"TONY hears something upstairs and starts up the stairs.",
"The group with the ZEBRA HEAD passes him coming down the stairs.",
"VOICE Watch out for the floor up there, it's weak.",
"TONY OK.",
"TONY and JULIENNE meet at the top of the stairs.",
"JULIENNE is visibly prettier.",
"JULIENNE I thought you were dead?",
"TONY I survived.",
"JULIENNE We have to start meeting like this.",
"Charming look form TONY.",
"His eyes lock with JULIENNE's.",
"She leans over for a kiss.",
"THE CAMERA moves toward him.",
"Tony steps forward to kiss and SUDDENLY....",
"TONY falls straight down out of frame.",
"INTERIOR - STORAGE ROOM TONY turns and falls into a room.",
"He ends up in a dusty room.",
"He looks up, unable to get out, he slowly drifts into a trance.",
"VIEW ON ALLEN'S APARTMENT ALLEN forces open the door to his apartment and sees that everything is on the floor and broken.",
"He picks up his COAT and a few valuables and leaves.",
"ALLEN comes back out looking for TONY.",
"ALLEN sees JULIENNE.",
"ALLEN What are you doing here?",
"JULIENNE Someone's fallen in the floor upstairs.",
"ALLEN Don't worry about it..Just a dead beat.",
"We have to get out of here there's going be an aftershock.",
"ALLEN hurries her out of the building.",
"There is an aftershock.",
"We hear SCREAMS.",
"TENANT'S VOICE Who checked the gas main, asshole!",
"MUSIC: Dvorak - Cello Concerto #14 in B minor Op 104 Adagio",
"INTERIOR - STORAGE TONY stands in the room in a trance",
"EXTERIOR - ALLAN'S APARTMENT - DAY",
"The camera tilts down and we see that the building is condemned.",
"A chain link fence prevents squatters from moving in.",
"INTERIOR - WRECKED BUILDING - DAY TONY wanders in Abandoned building.",
"He picks up a picture from the floor.",
"He sees ALLEN and JULIENNE standing together.",
"INTERIOR - AVALON OFFICE - DAY TONY and TONY'S LAWYER stand in front of an open window.",
"JIM The government has flip-flopped in maybe two or three years the problem will come up again but it least it gives us some breathing room.",
"TONY I'm thinking about starting over in LA.",
"I like it there, I've met some people I like.",
"I'm happy for the the first time in years.",
"JIM I knew you would be in spite of all the damage.",
"TONY How much?",
"JIM All interior roads are out.",
"Raymond's barn fell down.",
"There's no power except from generators on the big island",
"TONY Have you heard from Marie-Nøel?",
"JIM No.",
"We flew over and there's no damage to any structures, but her radio is out.",
"TONY I think I should get up there.",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND -DAY We see the big island floating in a sea of reflected light.",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND - DAY TONY walks from his boat on the pier toward the ranch house.",
"MUSIC:",
"Dvorzak - Cello Concerto #17 in B minor",
"Op 104 Adagio",
"EXTERIOR - ZODIAC - NEAR ISLAND - DAY Guys on boat hear thunder.",
"They stop and look around, hear it and are perplexed as it diminishes.",
"ANTHONY Stop the engine.",
"Listen.",
"They all HEAR thunder.",
"ANTONY plunges overboard with his board and pack and starts Paddling.",
"The zodiac pulls next to him.",
"ANTHONY I'll be all right.",
"Pick me up on Sunday.",
"The zodiac speeds off.",
"FIRST SURFER What's with Anthony?",
"He really did it.",
"He's crazy.",
"SECOND SURFER We'll pick him up on the way back.",
"FIRST SURFER Does he really think some chick lives on that island?",
"FIRST SURFER I guess so.",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND PLATEAU MARIE-NØEL walking up hill next to water, hunting with a bow.",
"MARIE-NØEL hears thunder",
"MUSIC:",
"Rene du pere \"Saltimbanco\"",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND PLATEAU MARIE-NØEL climbs a hill,hearing thunder.",
"She stalks through grass.",
"We see boar's eye.",
"She appears from behind a bush",
"Slow Mo of wide shot MARIE-NØEL picking up note and reading it.(flash forward) Just a clip of the paper falling.",
"RETURN TO MAIN ACTION She takes her stance.",
"FLASH FORWARD MARIE-NØEL reads the note, tearfully.",
"MARIE-CHRISTINE (V.O.) Happy 18th.",
"You're not aging well, but I shouldn't mention that on your birthday should I?",
"I could not think of a better way to surprise you than to hide this in plain sight.",
"Here's a treasure map to your birthday present, Some things that may help you when you want to leave home.",
"If I'm gone when you read this, then I'm right, and I'm not going with you.",
"Good luck.",
"Love you.",
"Your sister.",
"Marie Christine.",
"MUSIC: BACH Harpsichord",
"SEQUENCE ANTHONY paddles toward shore.",
"MARIE-NØEL Cries.",
"ANTHONY paddles toward shore gets turned away by cliff.",
"MARIE-NØEL sitting with letter overlooking sea.",
"EXTERIOR - ISLAND PLATEAU - SUNSET MARIE-NØEL reading letter.",
"VIEW on ISLAND SHORELINE",
"ANTHONY paddles toward rocks.",
"MARIE-NØEL crying.",
"ANTHONY pulls himself out of the water and stand in the sun."
] |
12 and Holding
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/12 and Holding Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/12-and-Holding.html
|
Anthony Cipriano
|
Drama
|
2004
| ["12 AND HOLDING","Written by","Anthony S Cipriano","04.06.04","FADE IN:","EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD STREET (...TRUNCATED)
|
12 Monkeys
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/12 Monkeys Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/12-Monkeys.html
|
David Peoples, Janet Peoples
|
Drama, Sci-Fi, Thriller
|
1994
| ["Twelve Monkeys","TWELVE MONKEYS","An original screenplay by","David Peoples & Janet Peoples","Insp(...TRUNCATED)
|
12 Years a Slave
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/12 Years a Slave Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/12-Years-a-Slave.html
|
John Ridley
|
Drama
|
1994
| ["12 YEARS A SLAVE","Written by","John Ridley","CARD: 1841","FADE IN:","1 INT. TOWNHOUSE/STUDY - DAY(...TRUNCATED)
|
127 Hours
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/127 Hours Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/127-Hours.html
|
Simon Beaufoy, Danny Boyle
|
Adventure, Drama, Thriller
|
1994
| ["127 HOURS","Written by","Simon Beaufoy & Danny Boyle","EXT. CROWD SCENES. VARIOUS.","A massive cro(...TRUNCATED)
|
1492: Conquest of Paradise
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/1492: Conquest of Paradise Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/1492-Conquest-of-Paradise.html
|
Roslyne Bosch
|
Adventure, Drama
|
1991
| ["1492: CONQUEST OF PARADISE","1492: CONQUEST OF PARADISE","by","Roselyne Bosch","REVISED","Septembe(...TRUNCATED)
|
15 Minutes
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/15 Minutes Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/15-Minutes.html
|
John Hertzfield
|
Action, Crime, Thriller
|
1991
| ["15 Minutes","FADE IN","on the words CZECH AIRLINE.","We are panning across the words on the side o(...TRUNCATED)
|
17 Again
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/17 Again Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/17-Again.html
|
Jason Filardi
|
Comedy, Drama, Romance
|
2007
| ["17 AGAIN","Written by","Jason Filardi","October 2007","EXT. FITCH SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL - DUSK","A fe(...TRUNCATED)
|
187
|
https://imsdb.com/Movie Scripts/187 Script.html
|
https://imsdb.com/scripts/187.html
|
Scott Yagemann
|
Drama
|
1996
| ["187 by","Scott Yagemann","REVISED SHOOTING DRAFT","November 4, 1996","FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONL(...TRUNCATED)
|
End of preview. Expand
in Data Studio
README.md exists but content is empty.
- Downloads last month
- 4