Non-SpongeBob Dialogue stringlengths 1 11.1k | SpongeBob Response stringlengths 1 2.74k |
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Patrick: We can blast him out. | No, no! Squidward said not to bother the man. So, we gotta be sneaky. Shh! He must've gone upstairs. |
Patrick: Well, how do we get up there? | Eye have just the thing! Ow! |
Man Ray: Oh, it's getting chilly. | Ow! D'ow! Ow! Oof! Ow. Now, I know Squidward said not to bother his guest, but there's nothing wrong with a welcome-to-the-neighborhood pie. |
Man Ray: Oh! May I help you? I was just finishing up in the bathroom. | Hello. Welcome to the neighborhood! |
Patrick: Don't mind us. Man Ray: Wha...Hmm. Man Ray: Is this sand? Patrick: Hamper sand—from my hamper. Man Ray: Ugh! | Yeah, stranger, we got a nice little town here—thanks to the Junior Crime Breakers. And we're always looking for new members. You look pretty fit. |
Patrick: SpongeBob. He's not putting out any snacks for us. Man Ray: Oh, sorry! How rude of me. Hmm...ooh! All I have is this pie. Patrick: Don't mind if I do. Man Ray: Eh—if you'll excuse me, I'll finish up in the bathroom. Patrick: He's all outta snacks! Let's go. | But, Patrick, we haven't asked him to join the Junior Crime Breakers yet. Hello, we were wondering if you'd like to— |
Patrick: Evil villain Man Ray. Man Ray: Now, what were you saying? Hmm? What? Hmm? Hmm. | Mermaid Man! It's Man Ray! He's right inside Squidward's...place. Too late. Man Ray must've gotten to them. |
Patrick: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy ice pops! They finally made them! | Wait a minute, Patrick. We're both wrong! It says right here in issue 55. Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are just taking their cryonic nap. But when they wake up in a week, they'll be weak for a week! Patrick, do you know what this means? |
Patrick: I'll have to wait a week for my Mermaid Man ice pop? | Yes and no. It means that you and I will have to be Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, and stop Man Ray's vacation of... Evil! |
SpongeBob and Patrick: By the power of Neptune, Mermaid Pants and Barnacle Star unite! | Patrick, is that... |
Patrick: I couldn't wait a week! Yow! Patrick: Ah-ah-ah— Patrick: Good thing I'm so stealthy, huh, Mermaid Pants? Ah! The stealth! Man Ray: Huh? Hmm? Hmm! | Ow! |
Man Ray: Intruders? Mm-hmm...I've got to call the cops. What am I doing? Villains don't call the police! I didn't think to bring any evil super-weapons on vacation! I'm unarmed! Huh? | Who'da thunk that Squidward would be stockpiling such a huge arsenal of evil super-weapons? So stale, yet so deadly. |
Patrick: I got my weapon! | ♪Dum-dah-dah!♪ |
Man Ray: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy? I knew you guys were old, but I had no idea you mutated. | Surrender, Man Ray! |
Man Ray: I'm on holiday. | Yeah, an evil holiday! |
Patrick: Prepare to be framed! TV Announcer: Vase vaporized! | Here's a dessert that's sure to hurt! |
Man Ray: Huh? TV Announcer: Figurines fractured! Patrick: No, no, no, no, no! | All right, Man Ray. I will snare you in my clara-net! |
Man Ray: Oof! Patrick: Uh...I can't think of anything! TV Announcer: Table toppled! Man Ray: I just wanted a vacation! | Evil never takes a vacation! |
Man Ray: Did you just make that up? Because that sounds pretty good. Do you mind if I use it sometime? | Help yourself, Man Ray. |
Patrick: Yeah, help yourself to pain! Man Ray: Why did I ever bother trying to be normal? I am Man Ray! Feel my evil wrath! SpongeBob, Patrick, and Man Ray: Huh? Man Ray: Hold on. I should get this. Hello? Squidward: Hello, Man Ray? The weather changed my plans. I'm coming home. Not to worry, though. You'll get a f... | Ooh! Definitely sounds a lot cooler when he says it. |
Man Ray: Ah, here's my Scuber. | Maybe one day Man Ray will reform and join the Junior Crime Breakers. Huh? |
Patrick: Man, he really trashed this place. | Okay, Barnacle Star! Let's be super good and glue all of Squidward's stuff back together! |
Patrick: Well, how do we do that? | Oh, Patrick, it's right here in issue 14. We have super saliva! |
Patrick: Ow! Squidward: Hello? Oh, looks like my guest left already. Home sweet... Home. Note: The instances of My leg are all numbered in this order: Fred: My leg! (1) (1) Ah! My leg! (2) (2) My leg! (3) (3) Hmm? My leg! (4) (4) My leg! (5) (5) My leg? (6) (6) My leg?! (7) (7) My leg! (8) (8) My leg... (9... | Hello, Fred. Your leg! (28) Looks great. |
Fred: Stay away from my leg! (29) (23) SpongeBob. | Oh, Fred, I'm so sorry I drove that freight train onto your leg! (30) Heh, choo-choo... |
Fred: My LEG! (31) (24) | Flashbacks tickle. |
Fred: Now please go away. | Ooh, I know. I'll protect his leg! (32) From harm, incognito. Ow, ow. Yowch! |
Fred: Hey, everybody! Look who's back! Construction workers: My leg! (33) (25) | This is his job?! Oh no. Not safe. Must think. Welcome back, Fred. Nice leg (34) work. But you know, it's a lot safer if you use a... table leg (35) instead. |
Fred: Wow! Really? | Now Fred, I wouldn't pull your leg! (36) Watch this. Huh? Well, at least Fred's leg! (37) is safe. |
Fred: My leg! (38) (26) Is really stressing out, Dr. Charley Horse. Dr. Charley Horse: Hmm. Uh-huh. You're right, Fred. It's so tense. But I've got just the remedy. Take off your shoes and follow me. Patrick: So far this plan stinks. | This is no time to be smelling stinks, Patrick. I need to protect Fred's leg! (39) And I can't do it alone. |
Dr. Charley Horse: The only way to relax your leg! (40) Is to walk on... hot coals. SpongeBob and Patrick: Hot coals?! Dr. Charley Horse: Now Fred, close your eyes, and repeat after me the ancient mantra: My feet (41) are cold. My feet (42) are cold. Fred and Dr. Charley Horse: My feet (43) are cold. Fred: My feet (44... | Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. |
Fred: My feet (47) are cold. Fred: Whoa! MY BUTT! (48) Dr. Charley Horse: Oh my feet (49) are cold, my feet (50) are cold, my feet (51) are cold, my feet (52) are cold! Transcendence. Fred: Oooohhhh! | All quiet on the right side. |
Patrick: All quiet on the left side. Sorry, sir. Old woman: Oh! | Sorry, ma'am. |
Fred: Hey, what's going on here? Girl Scout: Would you like to buy some cookies? | Mayday, Chicken Leg! (53) (41) We got a situation on the griddle! |
Patrick: I got the weapon! Yow! Fred: SpongeBob? Why are you following MY LEG?! (54) (27) (42) | Fred, you have to listen to me. Your leg! (55) (43) Is in constant danger. Isn't that so, Patrick? |
Patrick: I think I hurt my leg... (56) (28) (44) SpongeBob and Fred: Your what? Patrick: MY LEG!! (57) (29) (45) Fred: Aw gee, some guys get all the lucky breaks. | At least you know that your leg's! (58) (46) Perimeter is secured. |
Fred: I know. I just miss being at the hospital. | Why? |
Fred: Well, secretly... | Ooh! |
Fred: I'm in love with a nurse. | Ooh, you're in love with a nurse? Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! Fred, I've got an idea. Why don't we hurt your leg! (59) (47) So you can be reunited with your lady fair? |
Fred: Let's do it! And we should step on it. It's almost time for her break. | I'd say it's almost time for your break. I should probably use something stronger. |
Fred: Yeah, probably. Convict: Hmm? | Ahh? |
Convict: Hmm? Mm-mm. | Hmm. Trust me, Fred, your leg! (61) (49) Is as good as broken. |
Fred: Oh, my sweet nurse angel. I'll be there soon, my love! | And here comes the love train, right on schedule! |
Tom (robot): Don't hurt your leg! (62) (50) Don't hurt your leg! (63) (51) | Mr. Robot, that is very rude. How are we supposed to break Fred's leg! (64) (52) Now? |
Fred: He's just afraid if I hurt my LEG! (65) (31) (53) The doctor will replace it with his leg! (66) (54) | Oh, is that all? Shucks, he can have my leg! (67) (32) (55) It'll grow back. Boink! Enjoy. |
Tom (robot): Thank you, sponge man. This one is even better than my leg! (68) (33) (56) Fred: Aw, it's no use, SpongeBob. Maybe the nurse and me were never meant to be. | Now, don't put your tail between your legs! (69) (57) Just yet, Fred. I've got the perfect plan to get you back to the hospital. Okay, here's what we do... Heyyy! My leg! (70) (34) (58) |
Fred: MY HEAD AND TORSO! (71) Wow, that's crazy. They hit me everywhere except MY LEGS! (72) (35) (59) Fred: Thank you, SpongeBob. If it wasn't for you, I never would have made it back to my angel goddess. | Oh, don't thank me, Fred. Your leg! (73) (60) Did all the heavy lifting. I can't wait to meet this angel goddess of yours. |
Fred: Well, wait no longer, SpongeBob. Hello, Nurse Bazooka! | Nurse Bazooka? |
Nurse Bazooka: Sponge bath time! SpongeBob, Patrick, Convict, and Tom (robot): No! Patrick: I don't want to! Oh, no, no! Nurse Bazooka: ♪Scrub, scrub, scrubbity, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub♪ Convict: No! Fred: You know, this reminds me of a song. Fred: ♪When I met you, my finger... | Hey, I always wanted to show a little leg! (86) (73) |
Nurse Bazooka: Mwah, mwah, mwah. Fred: MY LEEEEEEEEEEEEEG!!! (87) (44) (74) Mr. Krabs: Squidward! SpongeBob! Just put me out of my misery. | Why, Mr. Krabs? What could be wrong on this fine day? |
Mr. Krabs: Fine?! Today's not the day for that word, boy. Not after I received this letter from the Fry Cooks Union. It says here fry cook SpongeBob SquarePants has accumulated too much vacation time. And if you don't take some time off, I'll have to pay a fine. | Time off? |
Mr. Krabs: Oh, I guess there's no other way to say this... SpongeBob, take a vacation. | Aye aye, Mr. Krabs. |
Mr. Krabs: Well, that went better than expected. | I'm ready, vacation. I'm ready, vacation. Vacation. Vacation. Hey, Gary. |
Gary: Meow? | That's right, Gary, I am home early. I'm on vacation. Well, good night, Gary. Good morning, Krusty Krew! Hello, Squidward. |
Squidward: I thought you were on vacation. Mr. Krabs: He was and is. I told you to take a vacation, boy. | What's a vacation? |
Mr. Krabs: Well, a vacation is when you don't come into work. | No work?! But what'll I do all day? |
Mr. Krabs: Oh, I dunno. Just go have fun or whatever. I really don't care. Ya just can't be here. | But who will fry the patties and clean the grill while I'm gone? Squidward can't do it all alone. |
Squidward: Nor will I. Mr. Krabs: That's why I've hired an unpaid intern as your temporary replacement. Patrick: Good morning, boss. I'm ready for my first day. Mr. Krabs: Speaking of starfish, here's your replacement right here. | Replacement? |
Patrick: Hi, SpongeBob. Mr. Krabs: That's enough banter on my dime. Patrick: Ok, boss. Mr. Krabs: Wait a second, Patrick. You'll need the right tools for the job. Patrick: Wow. Huh! They put a tiny me in the belly scratcher. Wow. It scratches backs, too! Mr. Krabs: Ah, take it from me, SpongeBob. Just go on home. Enj... | I really should tell Patrick the proper patty-flipping technique. |
Gary: Meow. | I'm on vacation, Gary. I'm not allowed to go to work. My stomach has receded! Mr. Krabs said I couldn't work at the Krusty Krab. He didn't say I couldn't eat there. This is my ticket back inside! |
Squidward: Go away, SpongeBob. You're ruining my vacation...from you. | I'm not here to see you, Squidward. |
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, do we have to go through this again? | I'm here as a customer not as an employee. Just gonna grab a Krabby Patty with Patrick for lunch. |
Mr. Krabs: Alright, but lunch only. If you so much as touch a spatuler, you'll be vacationing in Davey Jones' locker. | You have my word, sir. No working. Hey, Pat, it's time for your lunch... Patrick, you can't do that! |
Patrick: Huh? | You need to turn up the grill to exactly 298 degrees Fahrenheit. Patrick, this is no way to treat a Krabby Patty. |
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! What did I tell you about working? | Wait, it's not what you think. |
Mr. Krabs: Out you go, boy. | But my knowledge could help Patrick maintain the high standards of the Krusty Krab. |
Mr. Krabs: We've got it all under control here. I don't want to see hide or tail of ya 'til your vacation is over. You got that? | Yes, Mr. Krabs. |
Mr. Krabs: Well, boy... off ya go! And don't come back 'til it's over. | Oh, what to do, what to do. I know just the thing to get the spirits up. The official Krusty Krab playset. |
Squidward: SpongeBob, I need 20 Krabby Patties on the double, please. | Sure thing, Mr. Squidward, sir. 20 Krabby Patties coming up. |
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, what are you doing here? You're gonna cost me some loot if you don't get your square keister home. Out, out, out until your vacation is over. | Oh, what to do on this boring vacation. Hey, I know just the thing to get the ol' spirits up. |
Squidward: I need 20 Krabby Patties, please. | Sure thing, ol' buddy, ol' Squid. 20 Krabby Patties coming... |
Gary: Meow. | You're right, Gary. It is unhealthy to think of the Krusty Krab while I'm on vacation. I need to get out of the house. |
Squidward: Uh, Mr. Krabs, he's out there again. Mr. Krabs: I'll deal with this. Boy, you're on Krusty Krab property. Back it up. Further. Further. Further. Further. That'll do. | Mr. Krabs is right. In order to enjoy my vacation, I need to stay away from work. Physically and mentally. Hey, that reminds me of... Hold it right there, Mr. WorkaholicPants. You're on vacation. You just need to sit down and relax. That's more like it. Just sit back and watch the clouds. That one's a jellyfish! T... |
Delivery Fish: Huh? What's the big idea, here? Patrick: Hello? Hello? Hello? Huh, I didn't even know I had an ear. Hey, I just cleaned that one. | Patrick, shhh. |
Patrick: It talks! | Somebody help, I'm stuck! Mr. Krabs! Thank Neptune it's you. I'm in a bit of a fix here. Um, Mr. Krabs? Noooo!! Uh oh. |
Mr. Krabs: Now what? Tsk, tsk, tsk. I've had enough for one day, son. | Thanks for the ride home, Mr. Krabs. |
Mr. Krabs: Not a problem at all, me boy. | Just take the next right. Mr. Krabs, we just passed the turn off. |
Mr. Krabs: Uh-huh. | My house is back that way, Mr. K. |
Mr. Krabs: Far out, little man. Far out. | Where'd you say you were taking me? |
Mr. Krabs: Look, boy, I brought your spatuler. C'mon, boy, get it. Get the spatuler. Go get it! Enjoy your vacation, boy! | It's not fair. Why would Mr. Krabs try so hard to get rid of me? I'm only on vacation. Unless, it's a... ...permanent vacation! That's it! Mr. Krabs wants to replace me. Oh, I should've known! Patrick's had his eye on my job all along! He's been scheming! They think I'm outdated! They think I'm all washed up! Well, I'... |
Patrick: Working at the Krusty Krab. Making Krabby Patties all day. Flipping Krusty Krab working patties krab...uhh, that's a hard song to remember. Huh? | Who do they think they are? I gave the best years of my life to this place and they think they can just fire me like that? Like trash? I don't think so! |
Patrick: SpongeBob? Is that you? | I've been waiting for you, Patrick! |
Patrick: SpongeBob, you're scaring me. Ahh! Squidward: What’ll be? Customer: One Krabby Patty, please. Squidward: One shell on a shingle. Mr. Krabs: Well, I'll be...Patrick! Your cooking's improved one-thousand fold. Congratulations, boy, you've finally got the hang of it. SpongeBob? No wonder. Patrick could never fli... | Oh, I told him to stay home and watch television. |
Mr. Krabs: Why'd you do it, laddy? | Oh, Mr Krabs, I love the putrid grease of the Krusty Krab so much, I just couldn't stay away! |
Mr. Krabs: You don't have to. Your accumulated vacation time is used up. The union can't fine me, anymore. | You must've saved a fortune. |
Mr. Krabs: Bumping barnacles, yes. There she is. | Wow! That's more than I make in a year. |
Mr. Krabs: Don't be askin me for a raise. Just get back to work. | Yippee! I happily acquiesce. |
Patrick: Ahh! Sea spider! Sea spider! Sea spider! Patrick: Back! Back! Patrick: Whoa! Patrick: Oh, boy! Here it is! My lost coupon! I found it! Patrick: You have fought well today, sea spider, and now I must leave. For I am going to use this coupon to get an ice cream for my bestest friend in the whole ocean—um.. Spon... | Hey, Patrick. |
Patrick: Oh. | What you doin'? |
Patrick: I got this here free coupon and I'm gonna get you an ice cream. | That's nice of you, buddy, but I already got an ice cream. |
Patrick: Uh...but I'm getting you an ice cream! | Why would ya? I already got one. |
Patrick: Because I'm a nice guy! | Wow. There goes the nicest guy. |
Patrick: Whoa. Mr. Krabs: Hooray! I win a free coupon! Patrick: H-how did you know about my free coupon? Mr. Krabs: Me back knows. It breaks out in hives around anything free. Patrick: Guh. Mr. Krabs: I also know how heavy a free coupon can be. Patrick: It's heavy? Mr. Krabs: Much too much responsibility for a carefr... | Oh, hello, Patrick. What's up? |
Patrick: I was gonna give you this ice cream, but it melted. Instead, I got you this hearty handshake. | Aw, I love hearty handshakes, but not as much as I love ice cream! Care to join me? |
Both: Whoo-hoo! Mr. Krabs: Four hundred and fifty-one, four hundred and fifty-two, four hundred and fifty three, four hundred and fifty four, four hundred and fifty five, four hundred and fifty si... Ow! No! Ooh. I split me nail. Oh, that looks terrible. Hello? It's an emergency! No, I haven't been biting them! No... | Ahoy, sir. Where are you going? |
Mr. Krabs: Uh. Heh heh. It's a... it's a secret. | You have a secret? |
Mr. Krabs: Everybody has a secret, SpongeBob, and mine's gonna take 15 minutes. Maybe 20 if she can spruce up my cubicles. | Aye-aye, sir. And who will be in charge while you're gone. |
Mr. Krabs: Eh, well, not Squidward. No, no, him. Too lumpy. Okay, okay, you're in charge. | What? |
Mr. Krabs: You're in charge for the next 15 minutes. | I'm... in charge? |
Mr. Krabs: Yeah, sure, why not? You okay, boy? | Yahow! I won't let you down, sir. |
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