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You Don't Mess With The Snips | pre | Snips nodded, opening the cabinets on the other side of the room. He removed three plates from the upper shelf and three forks from the lower, and dutifully set the table with three identical places. Rarity's horn cast a light around three cloth napkins on the counter, and they lifted and twirled through the air, landing neatly in a standing position on the table like three flowing ballroom gowns. Sweetie Belle lifted the spoon to her lips and gave the Bologneighse a tactful taste. She hummed sweetly as the flavor assailed her senses.
"Sweetie dear, I know it's delicious, but you'll have to wait for the rest of us," Rarity chided. "Now go on and sit down. I'll take care of the rest."
The young white filly leapt down from the stool, slightly embarrassed as she approached the table. The two young ponies smiled at each other as Rarity sent the bowl of salad over to the table. Snips grabbed hold of the tongs and began doling out the meal's first course. As he filled each plate, Rarity checked another pot in which the pasta had been boiling, and determined that her dish was ready. She pulled a colander from another cabinet and drained the noodles in the sink. She then separated the contents into three equal portions and placed them in three bowls. The unicorn finished by ladling a generous amount of sauce onto each dish, bringing each one to the table.
"Presenting for your dining pleasure, our featured dish for the evening: Hoof-pressed Tailiatelle in a Porcaballo Bologneighse. Now everypony mangia, before it gets cold!"
They all lifted their forks and dug right in. Snips turned to Rarity with a thankful look as he took his first bite. His face alighted at the force of the food's flavor, which was...
"Squisito, signora! This is amazing!" he exclaimed. The colt lifted the fork to his mouth again, relishing the taste of the thick mushroom sauce cascading over the noodles hanging off his fork. Once the bite was thoroughly chewed and swallowed, he reached for a drink that he realized was not there. He looked at Rarity expectantly.
"Oh my! The drinks! It completely slipped my mind!" Rarity shrieked, bursting out of her chair. "Some hostess I am! Just a moment!"
Sweetie Belle released a light sigh. "All the time, Snips. All the time," she answered the question she assumed Snips was about to ask. Rarity returned to the table with and tray and pitcher, which she poured frantically into three glasses.
"Chai tea, courtesy of our dear Spike. I had a taste when I visited the library earlier today, and it was so delicious, I convinced Spike to make some for me to bring home," she explained, finally relaxing in her seat.
"You went to the library? How come?" Sweetie Belle asked with a quizzical tilt of her head.
"I wanted to talk to Miss Cheerilee about Snips," she answered. "She told me some very interesting things about his special talent."
Snips held his place, with the fork in front his mouth. He looked back and forth between the sisters with whom he was sharing the table. He wasn't really used to this much attention, and he wasn't sure how he should react yet.
"You mean how he got his cutie mark? Snips told us that story in the park, right before we came back!" the younger sister said excitedly. "You should've seen him out there! He turned a tree into a statue of me, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo in our talent show outfits!"
"Topiary arts, eh?" Rarity said with a little smirk in Snips's direction. "Very interesting, Mr. Snips. You know, I've dabbled a little in that myself. We simply must compare notes sometime."
"Uh, sure," Snips nodded, with an admittedly dumb look.
"Oh my, I'm sorry Mr. Snips. Here we are talking right over you, the guest of honor. I'm so embarrassed," she said, nervously brushing her hair with her hoof. "You should be the center of attention. I must thank you so much for accepting our dinner invitation. I certainly hope we didn't keep you from any obligations at home."
The young blue colt shook his head. "No, not at all. There wasn't any dinner waiting for me at home, anyway. Dad's in Canterlot right now doing his stint as a palace guard, so I'm staying with a friend and his family until he gets back."
"And...what about your mother?" Rarity asked.
"Well...no offense, Miss Rarity, but I'd rather not talk about that," he set his fork down with a heavy sigh.
"Oh...that was insensitive of me, I'm sorry," Rarity gasped out in guilt.
"No, no. It's nothing like that. She just kinda took off one day. Like, disappeared. Don't remember a lot of what happened, I was still really young. I asked Dad a couple times, but he wouldn't tell me anything."
"That's...awful," Sweetie Belle said. "I'm so sorry, Snips. I never knew..." She wiped away a tear, before moving out of her seat to give him a warm hug.
"It's okay, Sweetie. Really, it isn't that bad. I still have my Dad, and my best friend Snails. And now, I guess, you and your friends, too?" Snips asked with a tentative look. She nodded happily in response, putting an equally happy look on his face.
"I meant to ask you about Snails," Sweetie Belle said, returning to her place at the table. "What's going on with him? Yesterday, he couldn't even bring you the right bag from the classroom. Today, it's like he's some kind of snail sage or something."
Snips took another drink and wiped his mouth with the cloth napkin before responding. "Well, like I said, he's a good guy most of the time. He has...moments sometimes where...have you ever had a friend who you wish would just stop talking?"
Rarity sighed in a slightly harsh manner and nodded. "Yes, I have. But we're mostly fine, as long as nopony mentions cherries."
"What about cher--" Snips began to ask, but Rarity quickly held up a hoof to cut him off.
"The walls have ears, Mr. Snips. Let's just redirect to some other topic."
"Sure, okay," he said. "How about we move on to why you invited me over?"
"Yes, that does seem the logical path for this conversation to take," Rarity agreed. "The truth is, I am extremely interested in your special talent, Snips. Sweetie Belle may have already told you this, but I am absolutely smitten with her new mane-cut. And I believe that there is a very lucrative market in this town for such beauty as that. That's why I've initiated a plan to expand my Carousel Boutique to include a brand new Salon, and I want you to become my star stylist!"
"What?" Snips uttered in surprise. "You want me to work for you? But, I'm just a colt. I'm still going to school. I couldn't accept a job like this!"
"Dear, I assure you I'm quite flexible. I'm more than willing to work around your schedule. And youth aside, your talent is something that simply cannot be ignored," Rarity came around to Snips's seat and leaned herself onto his shoulders. "You have a gift, Mr. Snips. Let me help you to cultivate it. I can make you a household name all over Equestria!"
"Famous, huh?" Snips thought, running his hoof through his short orange hair. "I haven't really thought about that before. You really think I'm that good?"
"Well, there's only one way to find out," Rarity answered. "We'll go into my work space, where there is much more room and lighting, and we're going to have you style my mane."
"WHAT?!" Sweetie Belle squeaked out in complete shock. "But Rarity, you never let anypony touch your mane! Not even the ponies at the spa! You always wrap it yourself!"
Rarity smiled at her sister, and gently massaged her back. She would have tousled her hair a little as she usually did, but her mane was not something to tamper with at the moment. "Well, normally that's true, darling. A mare's mane is sacred, one of the most important parts of her body. And since you're both still young, I'll leave it at that."
"Like we haven't taken a health class before," Sweetie whispered covertly to Snips.
"But as a businessmare, it is my responsibility to know what I'm selling, and the best way to do that is to experience it for myself. Don't you agree, Mr. Snips?" she asked, regarding him with a playful flutter of her eyelashes.
Snips gulped, suddenly a bit uncomfortable. "Well...I guess, if that's what you want."
Rarity leapt from her chair with a giddy cheer. "Oh, it most certainly is, you wonderful little colt! Now then, let me clear these dishes away, and we'll retire to the Boutique's workspace. Sweetie, if you'd please, grab a chair and a bath towel from my storage closet. Snips, through that door over there is my vanity," she pointed to a door across from the one from which they entered. "Help yourself to any supplies you may need. I'll meet the two of you in just a moment."
They all split up to begin their respective jobs. Snips entered the dressing room and found a low cabinet holding a large lighted mirror. He searched the drawers and secured a number of hair clips, a comb, a pair of scissors, and a tiny squirt bottle filled with water. As he collected the supplies, the unicorn caught a glimpse of himself in Rarity's vanity. Not being a vain pony himself, he didn't often pause to check his appearance in mirrors. Today was different though. If the world was going to see him in a different light, then maybe he should try seeing himself differently as well.
Snips set the supplies down and gave himself a smile, but frowned when he noticed he still looked a little dorky. He tried a few 'Blue Steel' looks, flipping his mane around in an attempt to get some sparkles to materialize, but nothing he did seemed to improve his coolness. He wasn't dejected for too long; he realized he still had room to grow, and he knew that under Rarity's guidance he could grow into one of the most well-known and well-liked unicorns in Equestria. That is, if he didn't blow this job interview, as it were.
"Snips?" came a voice from behind. He turned, jolted, as he saw Sweetie Belle standing in the doorway. "You were gone for a long time. Everything's ready. You coming?"
"Uh....yeah. Yeah, I'll be right there," the blue colt replied very breathily. He did his best to shake off his nerves and gathered up all the equipment he'd selected from the drawers. He then followed the unicorn filly into the main workroom. Rarity was already in the chair in the middle of the room, taking a very relaxed posture. She saw the two younger ponies entering the room and gave them both a calm smile. This did nothing to assuage Snips's overall nervousness.
"I have to be honest, Miss Rarity," Snips said. "I'm not really sure I'm ready for this."
"Oh, don't stress yourself too much, young colt," Rarity advised calmingly. "It isn't good for your complexion. Besides, I trust you'll do an amazing job. And if you don't...well, it'll grow back, and I've got plenty of hats around here until it does."
"That doesn't exactly fill me with confidence," the young blue unicorn sighed. He moved behind Rarity and noted every line and swirl in her fantastic mane. It was already beyond beautiful, and he had no idea what he could do to improve on it. The sweat began to build, and his eyes began to scan the room, as though searching for a way out.
He was on the verge of fainting, when suddenly he felt something soft press against his cheek. It lingered there for a second or two before pulling away. When the shock to his system finally wore off enough for him to turn his head, he saw Sweetie Belle standing next to him with a brilliant rosy tint in her own cheeks.
"I believe in you, Snips. I know you can do it," she whispered sweetly to him.
Snips looked back and forth between the two white unicorns, hoping to find some kind of clues as to whether this was a dream or not. "Did...did she just..." he stuttered.
"I think she did, dear," Rarity replied, turning back to him. "Just relax and do your best. We both have faith in you."
He allowed himself a quiet smile as he felt his heart rate slow a little. His resolve renewed, Snips focused his energy into the shears and comb.
"Okay...I'm ready," he said as his eyes narrowed.
He lifted up the comb and water bottle to Rarity's mane and smoothed it out with gentle brushes. Then he pulled the scissors up with another magical glow and began snipping away a little bit at a time. Rarity remained motionless as she felt the gentle tug of the comb in her mane. She found the experience to be very soothing, which was a bit of a surprise to her. As she felt her mane flatten against her head with the moisture, she gave a happy sigh, confident that this was a good plan after all. Sweetie Belle watched from the side, mesmerized as she was yesterday, by the magic that Snips worked into her sister's mane. The blue unicorn was once again lost in his own world, where the only thing that mattered was the beauty that was in front of him, and the beauty that it could be. He indeed saw his future in this mane, and it would be up to him to seize it. Those were the thoughts that ran through his mind as he continued to work.
The tranquil scene was interrupted quite suddenly by a loud rapping at the window. Rarity opened one of her eyes, signaling to her sister to open it. Sweetie Belle moved to the other side of the room, right next to Rarity's plush purple couch, to give the window a solid push. A pinkish blur appeared from seemingly nowhere, and materialized into the unmistakable shape of Pinkie Pie. She had her typical look of hyperactive happiness as she hung by her hooves from the window's ledge.
"Hey Rarity! Hey Sweetie Belle! And...oooh, Snips! How are you doing today?!" she asked, noticing a familiar face in the room, but not one she was expecting. When Snips did not respond, or even look up to acknowledge her, Pinkie puffed her cheeks in very mild annoyance.
"Hello? This is the sound of my voice! It is trying to talk to you!" she cupped her hooves against her mouth to amplify her voice, despite also needing them to maintain grip on the ledge.
"Um, Pinkie Pie, are you levitating again?" Sweetie Belle asked, peeking behind the pink pony to the outside.
"Of course not!" the pink pony replied, pointing down. "Right now, I'm standing on Rainbow Dash!"
"And could we move this along, please?" Dash asked with a strain in her voice. "Pinkie looks like she's made of cotton candy, but she certainly doesn't weigh like it."
"Well, I certainly hope not! Can you imagine how inconvenient that would be? Just a slight breeze and then whoosh, there I go! I wouldn't be able to stay in one place for long at all! Although, that wouldn't really change too much about me, now that I think about it. I'd be able to see all kinds of new, fun places. And I'd get to meet new ponies in all the new places, and make all new friends! Oooh, but I bet I'd have to stop them from trying to eat me, since I'd be made of cotton candy, but I don't think I'd really mind, since I'd probably taste really good. I wonder if I'd have to keep from eating myself, or if that would technically just be me eating a part of my body, and that'd just be recycling since it'd grow right back. Would I even have organs if my body were made of cotton candy, would they be cotton candy organs, would they be able to eat things, or would I have to go the rest of my life not being able to eat? That'd be terrible, 'cause there are so many delicious treats to--"
"PINKIE!" shouted Rarity, Sweetie Belle, and Rainbow Dash all at once.
"Oh, sorry," Pinkie Pie chuckled with an embarrassed smile.
"That's quite alright, dear," Rarity said. "Though, if I may ask, did you come over here for a reason? As you can see, we're kind of in the middle of something at the moment."
"Oh, I was just passing by the Town Hall and I felt a little scritcha-scratch on my chin!" Pinkie explained, rubbing her chin as an example. "And I knew that means that somepony was talking about cherries!"
"Oh, no," everyone except Snips said in unison.
"Pinkie Pie, I don't mean to interrupt, but we really should get back to this important business meeting," Sweetie Belle chimed in. "Do you think it's possible for us to move this conversation to another time?"
"Hmmmm, okie-dokie-artichokey! Ooooh, artichoke! That's what it's missing! Maybe if I..." Pinkie continued her seemingly endless rambling, but was effectively silenced by Sweetie Belle's magical influence closing the window.
"Thank you, darling," Rarity praised her sister's quick thinking. "That is not something I am prepared for at the moment. Pinkie Pie is an absolute joy at times, but like Snips says, sometimes I wish she'd just stop talking. Okay, then. Snips dear, are things going alright?"
The young stylist finally looked up from his work and smiled brightly. "I think it's ready. Give me a second to clean up a little bit." He looked over the back of Rarity's hair, placing a few strategic pins here and there. He blew gently on her neck to chase away some stray snippings, earning a slight shiver in return. The colt finished his ministrations by circling the seated unicorn, taking in his work from all angles, and then taking his comb and flipping up her bangs one last time.
"And that's what I do!" he cheered, flourishing his comb like a baton. Rarity opened her eyes at his announcement, trying to get any indication of what her mane had become out of her peripheral vision. She turned to Sweetie Belle, who had a massive smile on her face, and that put her at ease.
"Sweetie Belle, a mirror, if you'd be so kind," Rarity asked gently.
The little white unicorn gave a short nod and ran to a dark magenta curtain nearby. She jumped up and wrapped her hooves around the golden drawcord, pulling it down and revealing another full-size mirror. Rarity had to control herself, or she would have rocketed straight through the ceiling at that very moment. Her mane had not been cut too short; Snips didn't want to take that much of a risk on his first 'professional' styling. Instead, he had smoothed out the length of her mane, so the tight curl at the end was loosened and appeared more natural. She liked the way it framed her face and gave her a dressed-down 'au naturel' kind of glow. The front of her hair, usually waved and curled off to the side, was now allowed to hang playfully across her forehead. Her horn peeked out in the slightest way, appearing almost as a tiny diamond-shaped island among a flowing ocean of purple. Rarity was deeply moved by the poetic symbolism. But what she loved most of all was the way her mane had been layered just the tiniest bit; the way the colors seemed to phase and oscillate as she turned her head left and right, it was like having a hundred manestyles all at once, each one more captivating than the last.
"Mr. Snips," Rarity murmured, nearly whispered. "I have been to the Grand Galloping Gala in, well, apart from Princess Cadence's wedding gown, what I consider to be the greatest dress I've ever designed. I've been a very, very important pony; dare I say, the talk of all of Canterlot. I was even temporarily transformed into a crystal version of myself." She paused a moment to catch her breath. "And yet, I have never, in my life, felt as beautiful as I do at this very moment."
"YES!" Sweetie Belle cheered, bouncing around Snips and then clamping him a big hug. "You did it! You did it!"
"You most certainly did, Mr. Snips," Rarity said, lifting herself out of her seat. She floated her towel over to a laundry basket near her storage closet. She trotted over to Snips and joined in on her sister's hug. "And believe me when I say that if you can satisfy me, then you can satisfy any mare in Equestria! I don't know how you did it, but I'm going to need you to do it again. And again, and again, and again....Then we should probably open up for customers."
"And there's that discomfort again," Snips commented with a small blush.
"Oh, I was just being a tad facetious, dear. As you're now an employee of mine, an interpersonal relationship would be quite unethical. Not to mention illegal. And, I didn't want to say this before, but...eyebrows. Wow," she said with a little giggle.
"What? What's wrong with my eyebrows?" the colt asked, widening his eyes in surprise.
"Well, apart from the fact that they're actually bigger than your eyes...nothing at all," Sweetie Belle added into the discussion. Snips tried to look offended, but he was just too overcome with the joy of the situation. They all laughed together, and Rarity pulled him just a little bit closer to her.
"Remember this moment, Mr. Snips. This is the day that both of our lives began anew. With your amazing talents, and my connections in the fashion world, the sky is quite literally the limit for us. You and I, Snips. Together, we will change the world."
"I believe that in the right set of hooves, a pair of scissors can change the world." his own words from just a short time ago echoed through his mind.
Snips's eyes began to tear very lightly as the gravity of the situation finally caught up to him. He nodded his head appreciatively and leaned in close in acceptance of his new boss's attentions.
"Miss Rarity...I think I'd like that very much." |
You Don't Mess With The Snips | Magical Chairs | The next week was a blur of activity to Snips. He went about his usual business at school, and spent any free time he had playing around in the park with Snails. To his surprise, those activities gradually began to include the Cutie Mark Crusaders as well. They were constantly coming up with new ideas to find their special talents, and although Snips and Snails already had theirs, they joined in just for the fun.
He also took the time after these youthful excursions to venture over to Carousel Boutique, to prepare for his newfound employment. The term was still so foreign to him; he didn't know of a single other pony his age who had a job, at least not in this capacity. He knew he had a lot to learn, and that his employer had a lot to teach. To his young mind, Rarity was a beacon of class and sophistication, somepony that was meant to be admired. The little blue unicorn wanted that for himself as well. Snips would often stay with Rarity late into the night, practicing his craft on her dressforms, magically modified to have realistic manes. He would also pick up on subtle cues to improve his etiquette and social grace, fundamental qualities that he came to learn would be crucial to his success as a stylist.
Snips woke up one Monday morning, and recalled that to his delight, the school's Spring Break was beginning today. He nearly flew from his makeshift bed in his friend's room and rushed for the door.
"Come on, Snails!" he shouted to the lump of pony in the bed next to his. "Spring Break! Let's go for a run, see what kind of fun we can get into!"
The sheets on Snails's bed began to part as his head slowly emerged, as a worm emerges from an apple. He opened his eyes with obvious effort and audibly parted his dry, cracked lips. The sound he made resembled no known words; it more closely resembled a croak.
"Oh come on, Snails," the shorter blue colt groaned. "I know there's no school, but are you really gonna just stay in bed all day?"
Snails lowered his eyelids in exasperation. Snips looked a little perturbed, but he shrugged off his friend's noncommittal attitude. Snails never did have a lot of energy in the morning.
"Fine. I'll meet you in the park later today. See you later, okay?" he said, opening the door with a swift kick.
The lanky orange unicorn laid his head back down on his pillow, giving another short groan. This one was different in that it inflected up at the end, implying a question.
"In fact, yes. Miss Rarity did ask me to come by if I had time today." Snips answered.
With one final groan, Snails pulled his blankets back over his head. Snips nodded to himself and left the room behind. He descended the steps and looked around the living room. Snails's parents had already left for their own jobs earlier that morning, so Snips made his way for the kitchen and poured a glass of water from the sink. On a warm spring day like today, hydration would be key. The young blue pony carefully cleaned out the glass with a cloth he lifted from the nearby rack. Once it was totally dry, he placed it into the basket by the sink. Now feeling fully awake and refreshed, he left his temporary home and made his way through town.
His gaze tilted up slowly as he came upon his destination. The Carousel Boutique was undergoing a minor addition to its side, as the skeletal frame of a new room was being constructed by a team of rough-looking stallions. He had grown acquainted with all of them over this past week, and as Snips looked on they moved around the wood and stone needed for the final product: a brand new Salon. The colt passed the construction site silently and approached the entrance to Rarity's home and workplace.
He gave three solid knocks on the door. After a few seconds the door swung magically open and Rarity greeted him with a wide smile and a wave. Her feathered, layered mane shook gently as her hoof moved up and down. Each gentle shift caused a slight color variation to her traditional purple, giving her hair the glistening allure of ethereal ocean of amethyst.
"Snips, dear! So glad you could make it! Please, come in. I've just been arranging all the necessary supplies for le jour d'ouverture," she said, milling about her workspace while carrying a small basket of towels and a box of new combs. "That's our 'opening day', you see."
The young colt pushed the door closed behind him and made his way into the center of the room. "It looks like there's still a bit of work to do, Rarity. Anything I can help with?" he asked.
"That's quite alright, darling," Rarity replied as she lowered her load gently into a cardboard box. "There is a very important package due in the mail today; we can't really do much more moving until it arrives."
"Really? What is it?" Snips asked, trying his best to reign in his curiosity.
The gleaming white mare gave a charming little sound somewhere between a breathy exhale and a curt laugh. "Oh, I can't tell you now, Snips. That would ruin the surprise!"
"Oh, okay," the colt said with an understanding nod. "So, is there anything that I can do for you?"
Rarity finished packing the box she was currently working with, and lifted it onto a nearby stack. She sighed gently from the exertion of her magic and smiled over to Snips. "As a matter of fact, there is. We've still got one more lesson you have to complete before you're totally ready to be a true expert beautician."
"Okay sure, no problem. What did you want to teach me?" he asked, walking a little bit closer.
"Oh, I'm afraid that this isn't a lesson that I can teach you, dear," Rarity explained. "I've called in a friend of mine to assist us for today. She should be here any second."
Snips didn't even have time to ask who it was. As soon as Rarity finished her sentence, a blast of silvery-pink glitter sprung up in front of their door. As the shroud began to dissipate, Snips immediately recognized the silhouette contained within; it would be near impossible for him to forget a cape and pointed hat like that.
"No way," were all the words he could force out.
The pony inside lifted her hooves and shot them outward, pushing the cloud of sparkly dust away as easily as pushing away a curtain. She gave her trademark victorious grin and used her magic to summon a fan to set down right next to her. Then her horn lighted again as the switch on the device flipped to the on position. She cleared her throat and struck a heroic pose on her hind legs, as the fan blew a forceful breeze through her mane and her cape.
"Yes, my friend! In fact, way! For the harbinger of your salvation has arrived! Gaze in amazement, as magical feats beyond all comprehension are conjured by the one, the only, the Great and Powerful TRIXIE!!!"
Rarity rolled her eyes with a heavy sigh. "Oh, for goodness sake, Trixie. I have a door, you know. You don't have to do that every time. And would you turn that fan off? You're getting glitter everywhere."
Trixie seemed to visibly deflate as she brought all her hooves back to the ground. "You're a lot of fun," she stated flatly.
A snap sounded out from her horn, causing the fan to disappear. Then she pulled her purple wizard's hat from her gleaming silver mane and whistled out to seemingly nothing in particular. But when she did, all the glittery dust that had scattered around the room vacuumed itself into her hat.
"Much better, thank you," the white unicorn nodded with a smile. "I'm glad you could find time between shows to come by for a visit."
"Oh, of course, Rarity," Trixie replied as she unclasped her cape. "When you told me the reason you needed me, I just couldn't stay away. Your mane looks spectacular, by the way." She lifted her cape up with her magic and gently lowered it into her hat. Once it was completely inside, she turned her hat over and over, and showed the completely empty interior to the two ponies in the room. Politely, they tapped their hooves on the floor in applause, though Snips was still a bit bewildered. Trixie bowed her thanks to them and winked her hat out of existence as well.
"It's great to see you again, Trixie," the Boutique's owner said. She moved over to Trixie and wrapped her up in a hug, which the magician instantly returned.
"But...I...I still don't understand," Snips said confusedly. "You invited the Great and Powerful Trixie here? THE Great and Powerful Trixie? Here?"
The light blue unicorn mare broke away from Rarity's friendly embrace, and strode casually in Snips's direction.
"And why not? Can a world-famous unicorn not take a little time for her friends now and again?" Trixie asked, briefly flashing a playful look of indignation. "How are you, Snips? I heard all about you from Rarity. I can't tell you how happy I am that one of my biggest fans has found his own life's calling, as opposed to just running around causing trouble for other ponies."
"Oh...yeah," Snips sighed. "I'm really, really sorry about all of that, Miss Great and Powerful Trixie."
"Please," she said, laying a hoof on his shoulder. "You don't need to use my stage name. Just call me Trixie."
Snips looked over to Rarity, trying to pick up some kind of cue from her. Receiving only an assuring nod, he asked the magical mare, "Trixie? Really?"
"Of course, Snips. That name, just like my stage persona...it's just part of the show. Could you imagine how exhausting it would be to act like that all the time? My goodness, my head would probably explode. Now then, shall we get started?" she asked, looking to Rarity for her consent.
"Oh, don't let me get in your way. Just do whatever you need to do, dear," the white unicorn answered, turning to back to her packing for the big move. "I'll be right here if you need anything."
Trixie and Snips nodded to her and moved to the other side of the room, giving Rarity a little more space to get her work done. The younger unicorn glanced back once more, and after a few seconds, turned to address his temporary mentor. Before he could think of anything to say, she held up her hoof and looked him up and down.
"You look a little more...fit, than I remember, Snips. Have you been working out?" she asked with a playful nudge.
Snips, seemingly at a loss for words, shifted his gaze in just about every direction but Trixie's face. "Well, I...I guess, you could say. I've been doing a lot of running, maybe that's it. Trying to slim down a bit. Image is really important; Rarity taught me that."
Trixie nodded. "Absolutely correct. And whatever you're doing, it's working, so keep at it."
"So...Trixie...what is it you're going to be teaching me today?" Snips asked. Trixie buffed the edge of her hoof on her coat and gave the little colt a smirk.
"Snips, today I'm going to teach you something that every pony in any profession should know, and it's something that only a pony like myself can teach you. And that is...how to put on a show!" she announced brightly.
"Put on a show?" Snips repeated. "But I'm not an entertainer, I'm a stylist."
"Snips, let me explain something to you: there's nothing more important to a showmare like myself than the audience. Anypony can put on one performance. But if you don't give them a reason to come back, there goes your whole career. The same goes for stylists like yourself," Trixie said, poking lightly into Snips's chest. "Anypony can go to any corner-store barber shop and get a mane-cut. So you need to give them a reason to come back to you. Give them something they can't get anywhere else. You need to show them a little..."
She ran a hoof through her mane, and in the blink of an eye, waved it through the air. The collection of tiny fireworks dancing around the ceiling accompanied her pronunciation of the word "FLASH!"
Rarity looked up from her work again when the light from one of the little explosions caught the corner of her eye. She glared at Trixie authoritatively. "Now wait just a moment here! There are very delicate materials in this room, Trixie! I simply cannot have you shooting fireworks all over the place like that!"
"Your materials are in no danger, Rarity," Trixie assured her. "The fireworks you see do not really exist. They are merely an illusion, or to be exact a symbol of the fireworks."
"Oh, is that right?" the exquisitely-coiffed unicorn said in exasperation. "Fine, then. Just keep your illusions under control from now on. I don't need anything else to complicate this renovation."
Trixie sighed in mild defeat again and waved the illusionary lights away. She turned back to her young student. "So there it is, Snips. You need a hook, an angle. A special trick that sets you apart."
"Okay, but...I don't think I can make fireworks like that, Trixie." Snips said, lowering his head in an embarrassed fashion.
Trixie shook her head. "Very true, my young admirer. Nopony can do what I can. Nor do I think they should. Take my advice: you aren't going to get far in life by copying anypony else. What you need to do is develop your own style. Figure out a way to apply your skills to your new profession in a way that will excite and entice potential customers and convert them into returning clients."
They both adopted looks of deep thought, mulling over what the magically gifted unicorn had instructed. Snips was at a total loss; he had never needed to impress anyone in his life. Nopony had ever really counted on him for anything. This was all so strange and terrifying for him, but he knew he had to put on a brave face. If he let on how afraid he was, he knew the world would hand him his tail on the first day.
"I got nothing," he said defeatedly. Trixie however, did not seem to be having that difficulty. He could see the idea turning over in her mind, and finally her eyes snapped wide open as she looked at him in earnest.
"How's your kinetic control, if you don't mind me asking?" she offered, picking up a nearby basket of threads as a demonstration. Snips followed suit and picked up another one right next to Trixie's. "Very good. But is that all you can do? I wonder..."
"It most certainly is not," Snips declared, putting on his best confident face in an attempt to hide his own trepidations. "I can do things with a pair of scissors that would turn your pointy hat inside out."
Trixie was floored, to say the least. She could think of no other response but to laugh uproariously and stomp her hoof uncontrollably. The light blue mare composed herself gradually and looked back up to meet Snips's confused stare.
"Oh, yes. Your enthusiasm is commendable, Snips. But perhaps you should brag after you've shown me what you can do," she advised. Trixie looked over to where Rarity was still hard at work organizing her new salon's supplies. "Rarity, may we make use of one of your wash basins and your sink, please?"
"Of course," Rarity said without turning away from her work. "Just don't make a mess. Or I should say, more than it already is."
Trixie nodded in agreement, and lifted up a mid-sized wooden tub from the far corner of the room, which served as the shop owner's laundry space. With a practiced angling of her head, she tilted the basin over the edge of a nearby sink, filling it part-way with water. Then she gently set it down in front of herself and Snips.
"Now then, here's what we're going to do: Instead of the usual 'spray down the customer's mane with a squirtbottle' you stylists usually do, we're going to add a little bit a flash to it. So try to match what I do: use your magic to form a shell around the water, just like this."
Snips peered into the washtub and barely made out a faint sphere of magic just below the water's surface. He kept his eyes fixed on it and Trixie bid it to rise from the water, high above both of their heads.
"Now, once the water is right above your customer's head, you create just a tiny charge in the sphere's center. Once the burst is concentrated enough..." She narrowed her gaze in deep focus. Then her eyes widened again almost simultaneous to the water ball exploding and falling down on Snips's mane, as though an invisible balloon surrounding it had just been popped.
"And that's a little something I like to call 'waterworks'. So, do you think you can do that?" Trixie asked, using her magic to inch the basin closer to the smaller unicorn. He looked at the water, vision now slightly blocked by his now drenched mane. An idea crossed his mind as he shifted his glanced between Trixie and the water.
"Sure, I could do that. But it just seems a little too...messy for a salon, don't you think? How about if I try this?"
Snips focused his own magical energy into the water, causing four small geysers to spring up in a square pattern. He gritted his teeth and strengthened his efforts, causing the little fountains to circle around the edge of the tub. Trixie was mildly impressed, but Snips was not finished. He cleared his mind of all other distractions; as he had done so often before when he was cutting manes, he blocked out everything but the water and the way it danced. He sensed every tiny molecule as they slid and bounced off each other, guided by his magic. He beckoned a modest amount of these water particles to the center of the tub. And with a slight nod upward, two thin strands of liquid emerged, twirling around each other in a perfect double helix shape. At the very top of their climb, they collided and sent down a fine mist of water, which landed gently in Trixie's mane. She watched, understandably in awe but trying her best not to show it, as the mist traversed the overhead lights and amplified a ring of rainbows in the air. She caught sight of herself in one of Rarity's many vanity mirrors scattering the Boutique's workspace, and sent herself a subsconscious kiss as she saw her mane glisten even more brilliantly than she was used to.
"Snips...wow..." the silver-maned unicorn gasped. "That was incredible. Beauty, grace, precision and control. It's everything that magic should be. I'm so proud of how you've progressed." She leaned in very close to Snips's ear and whispered as silently as she could. "I'm just going to put this on the table. If this whole Salon thing with Rarity doesn't work out, I would be overjoyed if you came to work with me. I could always use a proper assistant."
Snips, slightly shocked by the suggestion, responded with a grin. "Thank you, Trixie. I'll be sure to keep that in mind. But right now, I'm right where I want to be. So I'm gonna stick with Rarity for as long as I can."
"Good," Trixie said with a nod. "You passed the final test. Oh Rarity! He's ready!"
The shining white unicorn set down another box of supplies and turned around to face them. "Excellent! Thank you so much again for your help, Trixie. And Snips, I do indeed believe that we're ready."
The swell of pride filling the room was suddenly cut by a strong knock from outside. Rarity moved between the two unicorns and approached the front door, swinging it open with her magic. "And just in time, too. The important package I ordered is here! Thank you so much, gentlecolts. Please set it down right over there, in the middle of the room."
The team of stallions carrying the large wooden crate grunted their compliance. They brought the parcel into the center of the Boutique's circular foyer. Rarity floated a tiny sack of bits from a work table, and tied it securely around the neck of the nearest stallion. Feeling its heft, and realizing there was a healthy tip included in their usual fee, he smiled gratefully to Rarity and directed his associates back out the main entrance. The door shut swiftly behind them as they exited. Snips trotted up to the box, which was easily three times his height and twice as long as he was head to tail.
"So, what's in it? I think it's okay to tell me now," he asked his mentor and employer.
"I suppose so," Rarity nodded in response. "Trixie, would you mind assisting me with the packaging? I'm afraid my magic is not quite powerful enough to open it on my own."
"'Powerful' is my middle name, Rarity," Trixie smirked at her own joke. "Move aside and let Trixie work her magic."
Trixie focused her unicorn aura around her horn, solidifying and elongated the energy into a flat, prying bar. She wedged the bar in between the wooden panels on one corner and began to pull.
"You know, you could just use your magic to open the crate telekinetically," Rarity observed with a curious expression.
"I know that," Trixie said simply. "But sometimes I like to use my magic in ways that challenge my body physically. Helps keep me in shape. I have a responsibility to my fans to maintain my image, after all. And that includes my breathtaking figure."
With a final grunt of effort, Trixie pried the front panel of the wooden box, which fell discarded to the floor. Her crowbar spell dissipated in a light purple flash, and she used a simple levitation spell to bring a tightly wrapped object from the parcel's inside.
"Snips, as my thanks for agreeing to take this job, I'd like to present this as my gift to you," Rarity announced to the young unicorn colt. "I special ordered this from Canterlot last week; it's top-of-the-line, at the cutting edge of salon technology. Something that no stylist should be without. Mr. Snipsy J. Scissorhooves, may I present to you....your chair (chair)."
Trixie yanked off the plastic wrapping to reveal a stunning vision of silver and red. It was held aloft by a thick metal pedestal, meant to rise and fall and spin at the stylist's whim. The brand new red padded seats shined like rubies, yet looked soft and pliable like silken pillows. It wouldn't have surprised him if that's what that seat was actually made of. He circled the gift again and again, looking between Rarity and Trixie was a look of quickly growing elation.
"I can't believe it! It's amazing! You got this for me? A real stylist's chair (chair)? I don't really know how comfortable I am with how much money you're putting into me," Snips admitted.
"Well, that's what I think you're worth, Snips. I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't think you'd be the best stylist this town has ever seen. And as for the money, don't worry about that. I called it a gift, and that's what I meant. The only money you'll need to worry about is the bits you'll be raking in."
"I'm going to get paid?!" Snips shouted in surprise.
"Of course, dear," the white pony laughed sweetly. "Did you think I'd just make you work for me without any kind of compensation? I'm not running a sweatshop here. This space is as much yours and it is mine now. And make no mistake: you're the star of the show, and this is your chair (chair)."
"Is there some kind of echo in here?" Trixie asked, looking all around the room. They had all noticed it, but now they all took the effort to investigate. Snips went to the door and opened it up. Outside, he saw two mares standing there right in front of him. One stood with her head low, a look of embarrassment on her face, while the other jumped up and down in pure, concentrated joy, her light green and white mane bouncing in time with her. Snips stared between the two of them, not sure how he should respond to seeing these ponies on Rarity's doorstep, but Rarity broke in and saved him from having a bizarrely awkward conversation. She moved him out of the way, and smiled up at her new visitors.
"Bon Bon! Lyra! How nice of you to drop by! What can we do for you today?" the white unicorn cheerily asked.
The cream-colored earth pony looked over at her companion, who continued to bounce with an oblivious grin, and regarded Rarity with an uncomfortable smile.
"I am so, so sorry about this, Rarity," Bon Bon began. "What had happened was, we were visiting a friend at the post office, and Lyra, she overheard that somepony was having a..." she paused, appearing to dread the word she was about to say, "...chair, delivered today."
"EEEEEEE!! CHAIR!" Lyra squeaked in absolute happiness, continuing to demonstrate her widely-known proficiency for bouncing.
"Yes, Lyra, we know," Bon Bon shook her head, futilely attempting to shake the impending headache away. "So anyway, I knew I'd never hear the end of this until we found out where it was and who received it, so..."
"So...you followed my mail all the way from the post office to my house?" Rarity suggested. She wanted to be angry, but the absurdity of the situation wouldn't let her do anything but stifle a tiny chuckle.
"It's actually much worse than that," Bon Bon answered. "See, we didn't know who was getting the...you know what...so we had to follow the mail cart all over town until it dropped off the crate. We've been at this for a couple hours, and -- WILL YOU STOP THAT?!!" Bon Bon shouted, finally having enough of her friend's constant bouncing and squeaking. Lyra came to a stop and looked around confusedly, almost as though she we was coming out of a trance. "And here we are."
"Whoo, sorry about that!" Lyra said with a cheery laugh. "Kinda lost it for a sec, there. I just got so excited about the new..." Her sentence fell victim to her own excitedness, and she devolved into mindless giggling. Bon Bon placed her hoof forcefully on Lyra's back, trying to keep her grounded.
"Be good, Lyra. I'm sure Rarity has very important business to take care of today. She certainly doesn't have time for us and our nonsense," she offered gently.
Rarity glanced back to Snips, who looked just as confused as she did. But as an idea crossed her mind, she softened her expression and smiled to the pair of mares at her door.
"As it happens, ladies, nonsense just may be my business today. Would you like to come in?" she asked, moving aside and welcoming the two in.
"You mean it?!" Lyra screeched joyously. "We get to see the...eeee...CHAIR?!!"
Bon Bon sighed as she followed her friend into the Carousel Boutique. "Honestly, Lyra. Sometimes I think you won't be satisfied until you've sat in every chair in Equestria."
"So I have a thing for chairs, gimme a break!" the minty-green unicorn groaned in reply. "It's not my fault they're all so comfortable to sit in. Besides, I don't get on you for all those impressions you like to do."
"Those aren't impressions!" the candy-marked pony argued. "Once again, Rarity. I'm so sorry for taking up your time with this. What were you doing in here before we interrupted you, anyway? And why is the Great and Powerful Trixie here? I didn't even know she was back in town."
Trixie, now clearing away the wreckage of the opened shipping crate, turned to greet them with a smile and a bow. "I just arrived a short time ago for a little visit. Rarity needed help training her newest employee, young Snips here," she explained with a wave of her hoof toward the unicorn colt next to her. Snips nodded respectfully to the visitors and his name's mention.
Lyra divided her attention between the young pony and the shiny new chair, sparkles from the metallic finish catching in her eyes. "Training? Employee? What does that mean? Does it have something to do with the chair?" She blasted a stream of questions, keenly eyeing the chair while circling around it. "What is it for, anyway?"
Rarity looked over to Snips, both sets of eyes silently conveying a single message: they were ready. She nodded with resolve and walked over to Lyra and the new stylist's chair.
"Well, we don't officially open for another week or so; construction in still in progress, as I'm sure you've noticed. But for right now, I suppose it would be nothing but beneficial to give such honored friends a sneak preview, as it were. So, Lyra...Bon Bon...it gives me great pleasure to welcome you, the very first customers, to...SNIPS!" Rarity declared with an elaborate flourish of her hoof.
The little blue pony stepped forward and gave Rarity a puzzled look. "Um...me?" he said, tilting his head a bit to the side.
"Oh! That's what I've decided to call our new salon, darling. It's a marketing technique, you see. Everypony will be coming here for you, so why not put your name on the sign? Say, that's a good slogan: "Everypony Goes to Snips." Ooh, we'll have to make flyers!" she clapped her hooves together happily.
"A salon, huh?" Bon Bon said thoughtfully. "You know, you are due for a mane-cut pretty soon, Lyra. And I'm sure Rarity would be delighted to have such a connoisseur of fine...chairs, be the first pony to try it out."
"REALLY? YOU MEAN IT?!" the minty green unicorn said with exhilaration. "I get to sit in the...CHAIR?!"
"Of course, but only if you promise not to say "chair" like that again," Rarity nodded. "Snips dear, are you ready?"
Snips looked back and forth between his supervising friend and his first actual customer, giving them both a broad smile. "I am. We can get started whenever Miss Lyra wishes. Miss Lyra, would you like to get situated while I prepare my supplies?"
"Sure, let me just get in....ooh, this is nice," the green mare said, her golden eyes sinking in relaxation as she adjusted herself into a comfortable seated position. "Yeah, this is a really good chair. So, what do I do next?"
"You just sit back and relax," Snips said soothingly. He pushed the water basin to the sink and refilled it, then put it in position behind the chair. "I'm about to take your mane on a little journey."
"Oh, he's good," Trixie whistled, coming right up next to Rarity. They watched as Snips focused his power into his signature scissors and his comb.
"Well, he learned from the best," Rarity answered with a chuckle. She employed her magic to dim the lights around the Boutique, so that only a single spotlight remained to shed its countenance upon the stylist and his client. He took a few deep breaths as he felt the connection strengthening, and his magic intensifying. He pulled four streams of water from the basin and began to guide them in a dance.
Bon Bon watched the water spin and twist around with a curious expression , as she joined Rarity and Trixie off to the side of the room. "I'm still confused. What is this all about, Rarity?" she wondered out loud.
"Bon Bon, my dear," the dressmaking unicorn smiled in her direction. "All you need to do, is enjoy the show."
Snips looked over to her, and received an affirming nod. He closed his eyes and visualized the aura surrounding his tools, the water, and his intended objective. "So let's go."
He kicked out with his front hoof to strike the level on the back of the chair. This action brought the seat's backrest down slightly, and Lyra herself with it. And at that moment, the spiraling water structure reached its climactic peak, sending a cascade of fine mist into the mare's mane. He used his comb to spread out the water, pushing it deeper into her white and green locks. Once the mane was fully prepared, he inhaled deeply and pulled up his scissors. This is when he truly began to work.
The three spectating mares watched on in awe. Rarity, having seen Snips's talent several times before and having helped him to perfect his craft, was not as phased as the other two. She glanced at them with a confident smirk as Snips continued his work. They stood in stunned silence as flashes of light surrounded him and his chair. Lyra looked up from her position, a stare of quiet relaxation plastered on her face.
"I don't...how is he doing this?" Bon Bon whispered.
"I have no idea," Trixie replied breathlessly. "But I do know that I'm going next."
Rarity continued to watch on silently as her new associate drew his shears in circles around the chair, creating a whirlwind with his magical aura. "I'm going to need one of those numbered ticket dispensers," she observed quietly to herself.
In an instant, the trance was broken and Snips lowered both his scissors and the magical field encompassing him. He used his magic to bring the lights back to their full brightness. A beaming grin flashed on his face as he took a celebratory pose. As the light fully returned to the workplace, he cheered out loud, "The Snips!"
Trixie laughed under her breath as she approached the young colt. "Snips, do you mind telling me what in the world that was?"
Snips returned her laugh and shrugged his shoulders. "I guess I just got carried away a bit. Still, it felt sorta right."
"Well, I think it works," the magician nodded. "It's just like Rarity said. When you have something that makes you special, you put your name on it. It's your signature, an insignia. When ponies walk down the street, they'll look at that mane and say, 'oh yes, that's Snips.'"
"A signature, huh?" Snips thought. "Yeah, that works. Let's go with that."
Lyra slid herself out of her seated pose and down to all four legs. She felt the floor beneath her hooves, and looked over to Bon Bon, who stared forward with a shocked sort of glee on her face. "So...Bonnie...how is it?"
In lieu of a vocal response, the earth pony walked forward on very unsteady legs and gripped Lyra's tail between her mouth. The sudden loss of equilibrium dropped Lyra to the floor, as Bon Bon continued to yank away, dragging her to the door.
"Whoa, hold on, Bon Bon. Where are we going?" she asked.
"Home. NOW," Bon Bon responded through her gritted teeth.
"Oh. Okay," the minty unicorn smiled, suddenly grasping the situation. Rarity telekinetically opened the door from across the room, allowing the pair easy access to the exit. The cream-coated pony had nearly cleared the archway, pulling Lyra forcefully behind her, when the unicorn spoke up again. "So, yeah. See you guys later! Thanks for the mane-cut, Snips!"
Once the doorway was empty, Rarity shut the door and floated out some towels from her supply closet. "I have a feeling she'll be thanking him for something else in just a little while," she said with a mischievous grin.
"I have ten bits that say they don't even make it home," Trixie retorted.
"Um, Miss Rarity...I, um...I think I might be having some second thoughts about this whole thing," Snips said with a uncomfortable gulp. The white unicorn walked close to him and gave him a light hug, her own subtle attempt to calm his nerves.
"Don't worry. It's just an indication that you are a true stylist. You have a special power, Snips. It is a part of you, and you should never be ashamed or afraid to use it for good."
"A 'special power?'" Snips repeated.
"Yes, Snips. A stylist can bring out feelings and emotions that are typically buried inside, and ponies will naturally react to that. Some of them may react in a more...physical way, but for the most part I expect they'll just be really grateful."
Snips nodded unsurely at Rarity's explanation, but suddenly came to another realization. "So...should we be concerned that they never paid us for the mane-cut?"
Rarity shook her head and gave him a warm smile. "That's quite alright, darling. If they tell even just one friend about what they experienced today, then it will all be worth it."
Trixie reasserted her presence with a bright little giggle.
"I...do not think that that will be a problem." |
You Don't Mess With The Snips | I Guess This Is Growing Up | Today was finally the day. The final telling ring of the school bell announced to all of Ponyville that summer had arrived. To the school-age ponies of the town, this was one of the greatest days of the year. They had worked hard, and they had earned their time off. Many of them were in a hurry to leave, bustling out the front door in almost a shoving manner. The last two to leave, not out of sloth but more of a lack of need to hurry, were Snips and Snails. The taller unicorn almost broke out with a yawn, but quickly shook it away.
"Alright, school's finally out for the summer," he declared with a bit of laughter in his voice. "Hey, Snips. You wanna go play some ball in the park or something?"
Snips adjusted his bag, pulling it tighter to his side. He'd had to do that a lot recently, he noticed. The weight of his bag had increased from the supplies he'd grown accustomed to carrying, and combined with all the work put into improving his image, it no longer fit around his receding girth. He wasn't Canterlot-model thin, nor was he Snowflake toned, but he felt pretty good about himself.
Snips looked up from his personal attentions at Snails's question. "Wish I could, Snails. But I gotta head over to the Salon. Rarity is gonna want me to get started as soon as possible. She'll want me to work a bit more now that school's out."
"Oh. Okay, sure. I'll guess I'll catch up with you later," Snails said, his voice dropping in disappointment. And under his breath, he added, "as usual."
"Wanna come with me? I wouldn't mind the company," Snips said.
"No, it's fine. I got other stuff I gotta do today," Snails replied. Snips had no idea what kind of 'other stuff' Snails had planned, but something told him that Snails wouldn't be in the mood to talk about it. Instead, the smaller colt nodded and then they took to walking together.
After a few steps away from the schoolhouse, they noticed three of their classmates cross their field of view at an excited pace. They chatted together animatedly, and their joy permeated the air, bringing smiles to the two colts' faces as well. Snips's face fell a little bit as he saw one of the girls break off from her friends and run in the direction of her family's farm. He had seen her take this path every day since the incident that set the current events of his life in motion, and it killed him that he was still unable to find a way to make it right again. He sighed to himself, but then felt a comforting hoof from his best friend brush his shoulder.
"Don't sweat it, Snips. She won't be mad at you forever, you know. It'll all be cool again before you know it," Snails advised. "Alright, I'm gonna take off, too. Catch you later!"
Snips looked on as Snails bolted toward the two leaving fillies, quickly darting by them in utter defiance of his preferred name. He looked back and gave one of them a smug wink. Its intended recipient widened her purple eyes, a shocked gasp and a burst of laughter soon escaping her mouth. The young pegasus increased her pace, catching up to Snails and racing him side-by-side.
The little blue unicorn reached the schoolyard's gate, smiling to himself as he considered how for once in their lives, Snails had beaten him in something. Snails and Scootaloo galloped at a near-frantic gait, now very far ahead of Sweetie Belle. Occasionally they would bump into each other in a playful manner, fighting for position on their own imaginary racetrack.
Snails thought he was doing a good job of keeping his feelings secret. Snips didn't have any problem in letting him think that.
"Hey, Snips!" Sweetie Belle called out as she spotted him by the gate. "Walk me home?"
"Sure thing, Sweetie Belle," Snips said with a nod. He trotted up to her side, and after an exchange of friendly smiles, they both began walking into town. After a while, Snails and Scootaloo had gotten so far in front of them, they couldn't be seen anymore. Snips turned to his traveling companion, raising an interested eyebrow.
"Did you see what I saw back there? With those two, I mean," he asked.
"Yeah, I think I did. Good for them, right? It's kind of adorable the way they've been palling around with each other since Spring Break. Has Snails said anything to you about it?" Sweetie asked as she leapt over a small twig on the road.
Snips shook his head. "Nope, not a word. I think Snails is trying to do the whole 'secret relationship' thing. Too bad he's so awful at it. It's so ridiculously obvious. How about you? Has Scootaloo said anything to you girls?"
"Nah, she's not really into all that mushy stuff," Sweetie Belle said. "If she did have any sort of special feelings like that, no way she'd tell us. She'd probably bottle it up," she added beneath a mask of reflection. "Next time I see her though, I might try asking about that. It might be worth it just to see the look on her face."
"Bring me along, would you? I'd like to see that too," the colt remarked.
The two young ponies proceeded to laugh their way back to town. As Ponyville's central fountain came into view, Snips's line of vision diverted off to another part of town. Sweetie Belle noticed his distracted gaze and cleared her throat to get his attention.
"I guess you're on your way back to Rarity's, huh?" the filly asked. Snips nodded in reply. "Makes sense. You'll probably be there all the time now that school's out."
"I know," Snips said, "it's almost like I've been living there lately. You know, at first I wasn't sure about this whole thing. But Rarity's actually pretty nice, and helping her with the new Salon has been really, really cool. I feel like I'm really making a difference here in Ponyville; everypony seems to like their new manestyles."
"I know I do," Sweetie Belle said with a smile. "Thanks a lot for the touch-up yesterday. I want to keep this beautiful mane going as long as I can."
Snips chuckled a little and brushed his own mane to the side with his hoof. "Hey, anytime. I'm happy that I could make you happy. Are we going the right way? Now that I think of it, I've never actually been to your house before."
"It's right down this hill," the white filly pointed ahead. "See that pond down there? It's the house right next to it. Dad likes to fish off that dock. Like, all the time. Sometimes, it seems like he does more fishing than sleeping."
"Sounds like a stallion who has life figured out," Snips mused.
"Oh, don't you start with that, too," Sweetie said, giving the colt a playful shove. "Alright, I think I can make it on my own from here. Say 'hi' to Rarity for me, okay? I'll try to stop by later."
"Hold on, Sweetie Belle," Snips said, gripping onto one of her forelegs. "Before you go...I wanted ask about Apple Bloom. She seems like she's spending a lot of time by herself lately. Have you noticed anything, let's say, unusual about her?"
She sighed lightly and shifted a stray curl away from her face. "Well, yeah. Apart from me and Scootaloo, she doesn't really talk to anypony. She seems really depressed about something, but we still can't get her to talk about it. And we haven't done any crusading with her in like, forever."
The forlorn colt never had wanted to crawl away and hide in a hole as badly as he did at that moment. "I know what it is," he sighed. "This is all my fault because of what I did. I wish I could just go back in time and make it so none of this had ever happened."
Sweetie Belle leaned in closer to him and laid a comforting embrace around his neck. She stroked his mane calmingly and shushed away the impending sobs she could feel forming in his lungs.
"I know how you feel, Snips. Really, I do. But you have to get that out of your head," the filly said, showing another flash of maturity. "Maybe all this happened because of what you did, maybe it didn't. But even if it was, it's okay. We all make mistakes, right? Instead of wishing to erase what happened before, you should be trying to fix it now."
Snips nodded and wiped his eyes. "Thanks for trying to cheer me up, Sweetie Belle. But I still don't know..."
"Snips, we're friends, alright?" she answered with a smile. "And friends help friends whenever their friends are sad. Which is why I'm gonna help you and Apple Bloom solve this problem. Tomorrow morning, I'm gonna go to Sweet Apple Acres to find out once and for all what's going on with her. How about if you come by around noon or so, and we'll settle this whole thing, okay?"
"Okay. Thanks again, Sweetie. I gotta get going now. I'll talk to you later!" Snips said with a short wave. Sweetie Belle waved back, bringing a bright smile to his face. A feeling of invigoration filling his hooves, he broke into a sprint toward the Carousel Boutique.
As Snips made his way back through town, he noticed many of the mares sporting his manestyles. Some of them gave him little smiles as they passed, while others looked away awkwardly. He felt like he could guess the reason behind that. He fought away the growing blush on his face and continued on to Rarity's place of business.
Soon the Boutique came into view, and he cut his vision slightly to the left to observe the completed building attached to its side. It was a small gazebo-style building, similar in design and colors to the structure next door, only with a smaller spire and fewer adornments. In thin, stylized lowercase letters, a single word garnished the space above the entrance: "snips".
He opened the door and laid his hooves on the bright tiled floor. Then he made his way to the shelf lining the back of the room, slid off his saddlebag and laid it down. He emptied the entire contents of the bag and organized them neatly on the shelf. Exhaling with a satisfied smile, Snips moved over to his personal stylist's chair. He took a second to admire his frame in the reflection of the chair's shiny metal, proud of all the weight he'd lost since he took this job. Then he took a cloth that was slung over the chair's arm and polished a few spots on the pedestal. His ministrations were interrupted by sound of the door opening. He looked up to see his mentor Rarity entering the salon, glowing with positive emotions.
"Snips, bienvenue! How lovely to see you!" she said through the widest smile she could summon. "Getting all ready for the evening rush?"
"You got it, Rarity!" he said, mirroring her enthusiasm. "Thanks for holding down the shop until I got out of school."
"Oh, not at all, dear. I needed a break from making dresses, after all. Thank goodness we needn't be concerned with the distraction of school for now."
"Yeah, my schedule is a lot more open," Snips said as he put away the last of his supplies. "Just don't forget I'm just a pony, not a machine. I'll need time off once in a while."
"Of course, dear. This business is all yours; I'm just staying on as a supervisor. Feel free to make your own hours, just remember that you don't get paid unless you work," Rarity said with a mildly strict tone. "And also, I've invested a fair amount into you and this salon. I expect to make that money back."
Snips gave a crooked smile in an attempt to hide his unease, but he could understand Rarity's situation as well. He'd already made a decent sum of money for his employer, and he intended to continue his hard work for as long as he was needed.
"Good," the dressmaker said. "Now, let's go ahead and open up, shall we?"
After flipping around the sign in the adjacent window, signifying the salon's status as open, Rarity pulled open the front door. She knew the shop had become popular in the last month since the opening, and she did expect a good crowd tonight. But she didn't expect a customer waiting outside the second she opened, and she certainly didn't expect this one.
"Howdy there, Rarity! How y'all doin' today?" came the twangy Southern greeting of Ponyville's resident apple baroness.
"I...uh...yes. Applejack. Hello. How, um, how nice to see you. Would you...like to come in?" Rarity stammered.
"Well, that's mighty neighborly of ya. I'd be glad to," Applejack said with a smile.
Rarity moved to one side and ushered Applejack inside, pushing the door shut behind her. "Now, what is it that we can do for you, darling?"
The blond earth pony took off her hat and laid it gently on a nearby wall hook. Then she turned back to Rarity to answer. "Well Rarity, I been keepin' an eye on this outfit yer runnin', an' I gotta say, I reckon ya done yerself mighty proud with this here barbershop. So I figured...ya know, one businessmare to another...that I might oughta come by, an' give ya some business."
"I...Applejack...are you asking me...to style your mane?" the white unicorn asked through short gaspy breaths. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! YESSS!!!! I've been dreaming about this day since we met! Oooh, I need to go to my room and get my sketchbooks. I have so many concepts I want you to look through! And we don't need to stop at the mane; I have this simply divine ensemble I've been saving for just this--"
"Whoa-ho! Slow down there, Sally," Applejack said. She had taken to gripping Rarity by the shoulders, because she was convinced the unicorn would float away if left unhitched. "This ain't no fashion call. I was just thinkin' with the summer months comin' up, it might be a good idea to look into a more, whatchacallit, practical manestyle. Crop the ol' gal down just a mite. What with all the heat we're fittin' to get, just won't do me no good to have all this mane gettin' in mah eyes, stickin' to mah forehead an' all. Weighin' me down with all that--"
"Okay, okay, I'll do it," Rarity replied, wrenching herself away from Applejack's grasp. "Just...stop talking about..." An audible shudder preceded the word, "...sweat. Snips, would you please prep the chair for our most valued customer?"
"Uh, actually Rare, I'd prefer it if Snips weren't the one to do this. Nothin' against ya, little fella, but I seen some a' the work ya done 'round town. Real nice, sure 'nuff, but...I'd rather keep control over mah...baser instincts."
Rarity looked over to Snips, and received an understanding, even a little bit grateful nod. She moved over to the shelf where Snips had laid his supplies and picked up a few with her magic.
"If you insist, darling. Customer satisfaction is our priority here at 'snips'. Our star stylist is one of the best, but I'm no slouch myself. And if you want me, then I'm happy to oblige."
"I thank ya kindly, Rarity. An' truth be told, there's another reason I decided to stop on by today," Applejack said, moving back to the door. She gripped the handle with her hoof and pulled it open, then took a look around outside. She found what she was looking for after a few seconds of searching, a perturbed glance given down to the pony she'd brought with her. She gripped her little sister by her shoulders and carried her into the salon, despite the constant protest.
"Applejack, I told ya! I ain't gonna do this! I just can't!" Apple Bloom whined as her sister unceremoniously dropped her to the floor.
"Uh-uh! We ain't doin' this again, AB!" Applejack said, applying her strictest tone. "Y'all been mopin' 'round the farm fer goin' on two months. Now we got the summer harvest comin' up, and I ain't about to have ya draggin' tail through the busiest applebuck season our farm's ever gonna see! Y'all are gonna talk this out right now!"
"Alright, alright!" the younger Apple sibling groaned. "I'll do it. Just...gimme a minute, okay? I gotta...get mahself ready first." She took a few deep breaths and walked over to the chair where Snips was still standing. "Snips...I...I wanna say, I'm..."
An air of discomfort permeated the room, which Rarity easily picked up on. "If I may. If you two would like some privacy, feel free to use Snips's private breakroom through the door behind you. Don't give me that look, darling. This is your workplace, after all; it's only fair that you have a room to yourself where you can unwind."
Snips still gave Rarity kind of a weird look, but he shrugged his shoulders in resignation. He turned to Apple Bloom and offered his hoof forward to her, leading her to the door. She regarded him with an awkward smile and walked past him to the still closed door. Snips pushed it open and allowed her to pass by, then he followed her into the room. A quick look around the room prompted him to whirl around in the doorway and narrow his eyes in Rarity's direction.
"Rarity, why does my breakroom have a bed?" the unicorn colt asked.
"Oh, yes," Rarity replied with a chuckle. "You see, I furnished the room with remnants from my old guest bedroom. This building cost a lot to construct, so I'm saving money wherever I can. I'm trying to turn a profit, after all. And honestly, why wouldn't you want to have a nice comfortable bed in which to relax during a particularly trying shift?"
"I guess," Snips said. "I'll let you get to it, then. Just call if you need me."
"Thank you, Snips dear. But I should be just fine," Rarity said with a confident flip of her mane. "You just worry about the issue between yourself and Apple Bloom. I know how much it's been bothering you; that should be your priority right now."
The young colt nodded with a grin and moved back a bit to allow the door to close. He turned away from the door to see Apple Bloom already sinking into the softness of the mattress. She nervously swirled her forehooves around each other as she stared blankly into the patterns of the bed's quilted blanket. She sighed quietly and reached up to her head, touching her hoof gently to the tan sunhat that Rarity had given her. Hardening her resolve, she slipped the hat off and laid it on the bed. Two months of growth had replaced most of the work Snips had done on Apple Bloom's mane; the expertly combed bangs and playful wave on the side of her head were just barely visible. She gave him a nervous smile as he walked from the door to stand at the edge of the bed.
"Snips, before this whole thing starts," she said, "I just wanna say I'm awful sorry 'bout the way I been actin'. Ya know, avoidin' ya in school, and...well, jus' about everywhere. That's plain rude, I know, and it ain't no way to treat a friend."
"No, Apple Bloom. I'm the one who should be sorry," Snips replied. "It was my fault. I should have thought about your feelings before I just went to town on your mane like that. I was a thoughtless jerk."
Apple Bloom shook her head. "It ain't that bad, Snips. Y'all were just doin' what you're meant to do. As a Cutie Mark Crusader, I gotta respect a pony who's usin' their talent to their full potential. I know everypony'd expect the same from me."
"I'm glad you're so understanding, Apple Bloom," Snips said with relief. "So, you aren't mad at me?"
Apple Bloom ran her hoof through her mane, sliding a few strands behind her ear. "Well, at first I was. Or, I thought I was. I don't really know what I felt, honest. But after a while, I started to think about how pretty y'all made me look, and I...well, I got kinda scared and confused, I guess. I couldn't figure mah own feelings out, so I just locked 'em up. I guess I kinda locked all mah friends out too, huh?"
"Wait a minute," the colt said, holding up a hoof and starting to glow faintly in hope. "What...feelings, exactly, do you mean, Apple Bloom?"
"Well, I thought the way I was feelin' was 'cause I might like ya a bit. But then Sweetie Belle told me about how her sister explained the Stylist's Bond to her, and I realized mah problem was 'cause I had a hard time trustin' ya with mah mane, since ya ain't never cut it before."
"Oh..." Snips said as his glow vanished. "I'm sorry, Apple Bloom. I didn't think about how important your mane was to you, and how much you were trusting me. I wouldn't have got so carried away and..."
Snips stopped his apology as the yellow filly's words registered in his mind. "What was that about a stylist's bond? Rarity didn't mention that in my lessons."
"Yeah, I didn't really get a lot of it, either. But I think the gist mighta been somethin' about how a stylist is a real important pony who makes ya feel pretty on the inside, but ya gotta trust 'em enough to be who ya really are 'round 'em," Apple Bloom explained.
"So, it wasn't because you thought you liked me, after all?" Snips asked, a little disappointment poking through in his voice.
"Well...I guess not," she said. The filly pulled her hat closer to her and smoothed the material of the brim, mostly out of a need to do something to avoid this awkward situation.
"That's too bad, Apple Bloom," Snips said. "Because I really, really like you."
The filly laying still on the bed dropped her hat suddenly and shot her head up in surprise. Her mind went into overdrive, trying its best to process what she had just heard. Snips looked up at her with nervous energy in his eyes; she could tell he wanted her to say something.
"Huh-what?" She wished she could've come up with something smarter to say than that. Or at least something that didn't make her sound quite so dopey.
Snips began pacing as he went over what he wanted to say in his own head. "I mean...yeah, that's right. I like you, Apple Bloom. Like, a lot. I have for a really long time. You're so strong and kind, and you're always willing to help anypony who needs you. And...well, you're the most beautiful pony I've ever seen. When I offered to style your mane that day...well, this is going to sound so corny...I just saw a chance to show you the beauty that I see every time I look at you."
Apple Bloom held a hoof up to her mouth, hiding the smile creeping across her face. "You're right. That is corny. But still, that's one a' the sweetest things I ever heard in mah whole life. Y'all really feel that way 'bout me?"
"I do," Snips nodded fervently. "Please, let me take you out tomorrow, as an apology. We'll go down to the lake near your farm and have a picnic lunch. You know, get to know each other better."
Apple Bloom climbed down from the bed, clutching her hat in her teeth. She dropped it again as she landed on the floor, walking to the spot where Snips had halted his pacing. "That sounds mighty nice, Snips. Alright, ya got a deal. On one condition."
She moved directly in front of him and gently stroked his cheek with a forehoof, punctuated by a little tap. "Y'all gotta let me bring the lunch. Y'all got yer talent, I got mine. We clear?"
"Deal," Snips replied happily. "Thanks again for talking this over with me."
"Yeah well, I didn't really have a choice, ya know? But, I'm glad I did, anyway. Woulda had to do it sooner or later, right?" Apple Bloom shrugged, picking her sunhat back up again. She suddenly froze in the middle of her toss, and instead of her head, set it back down on the bed. "Actually, why don't you hold onto this fer me? I don't think I'll be needin' it anymore."
Snips nodded happily and walked back to the door to the salon's main room. As he pushed the door open he beckoned back to the yellow earth filly with a smile. She walked up next to him and they left the room together. They saw Rarity hard at work beside a wooden chair by a sink. Applejack was in that seat, leaning her head far back into the sink. A showerhead hovered above her, connected to the sink by a long hose, and supported by Rarity's levitation techniques. The white unicorn glanced in their direction at the sound of the opening door.
Applejack opened her eyes as Rarity shut off the water and removed the hose. She looked over at her sister and adopted a smile of subdued surprise. "Why, Apple Bloom! Ya ain't wearin' that hat no more! Y'all really did work it out after all!"
"Eeyup!" Apple Bloom replied joyfully. She pressed her side against Snips's own and let out a barely suppressed giggle. "I think everythin' is gonna be just fine 'tween us from now on."
"Well, I'm happy as a pig in mud to hear that, AB," Applejack said, earning a disgusted shiver from Rarity. "Oh, lighten up, Rare. It's just a sayin', that's all."
"I know what it is, Applejack. That doesn't meant it's not unpleasant to hear about," the unicorn mare said through her gritted teeth. She gave a sigh as she reset the showerhead in its holster above the sink, and then turned to where Snips and Apple Bloom were standing. "But I'm very happy for the both of you as well. I hope you've learned the importance of not hiding your feelings from your friends. It's much easier to solve these kinds of problems if you just talk to each other. A very important lesson, if I do say so myself."
"I understand, Rarity. Thanks so much!" Apple Bloom cheered. She turned to Snips and left a tiny peck on his cheek. "I'll see ya 'round, Snips. I'm gonna go home an' see if Granny Smith'll help me make a pie."
With another massive smile, she bounded off through the front door and headed for home. Snips was left standing in place, dumbfoundedly rubbing the spot on his cheek that Apple Bloom had just kissed. Rarity looked at him with an eyebrow raised in interest.
"A pie, did she say? Now what, pray, was that all about, Snips darling?" she asked, not bothering to hide her smirk.
"Um, well...the thing about that is, we're sort of...going out...tomorrow. Oh, that reminds me, I'm going to need tomorrow morning off," the colt said.
"Your own hours, dear. Just come in tomorrow whenever you can," Rarity answered while running a brush through Applejack's mane. "Although, I may have to think about hiring some more staff, so I can create a regular schedule like a respectable business. I wonder who else cuts manes in this town? Maybe Photo Finish might be able to get me in touch with some ponies, or..."
"Uh, Rarity," Applejack interrupted, "is this gonna take a whole lot longer? 'Cause I got a buncha work left waitin' fer me back at the farm, an' I'm losin' a lotta daylight here."
In response to the earth pony's question, Rarity pulled up a thin pair of scissors with her magic and worked them open and shut in front of Applejack's eyes. "I know you only wanted a quick trim, dear. But even that will take some time. This isn't like...cutting down a cornstalk, where you can just grab a sickle, pick a spot and start chopping. This is a very delicate procedure."
"Uh, okay," Applejack said in a confused tone. "But that doesn't really answer mah question."
"Just a little bit longer, Applejack. All that's left is to trim down the back. Now are you absolutely sure you want me to do this? This is your beautiful mane we're talking about; it would be such a shame to cut it all off," Rarity said, looking sincerely into her friend's eyes.
Applejack nodded her head in assurance. "I certainly do, Rarity. I think I can live with a short mane for a couple a' months. An' I'm pretty sure I can, as y'all might say, 'make it work.'"
Rarity took a deep breath and brought the scissors behind Applejack's head, prepared to begin the first cuts into her hair. Just as the sound of the very first snip floated into the air, it was silenced by a sudden knock at the salon's entrance. The white unicorn glanced over at Snips, pointing him with her head towards the door. Snips looked at Rarity with an understanding nod and trotted over to the door. He opened it, and standing outside was an earth pony mare that he'd never seen in town before. Her coat was a light tan color with just a hint of a golden tint. Her blindingly blonde mane and tail were fluffed and puffed to the point that it looked like a pair of clouds were resting on her head and back. A similar cloud of fluffy hair encircled each of her legs, just above her hooves. Snips's eyes traced very briefly to her cutie mark, the image of a fuzzy brown moccasin slipper emblazoned on her flank. She smiled down at Snips with peaceful calm in her azure eyes.
"Good afternoon, sir," she said with a little bow as refined as her accent. "I'm new in town. Actually, I just got off the train. I saw a flier for this new salon there at the station, and everypony I've spoken to has positively raved about it. I was hoping to squeeze in a quick session with the head stylist, if they're available."
Snips took a deep breath, recalled all his lessons with Rarity, and finally smiled back to his new visitor. "Yes, of course. Our main chair is currently open, and we would love to have you as our honored guest. Welcome to 'snips'. My name is Snipsy J. Scissorhooves, but you can just call me Snips. I'm the owner and lead stylist of this establishment."
"Oh...my. You are the stylist? That's...so interesting," she said. She looked over to Rarity, garnering her attention with an interested gaze. "Then, who is this attractive mare over here magically manipulating the pair of scissors?"
The white pony laid down her shears gently and grinned in the new customer's direction. "How nice of you to say, thank you. I am Rarity, and I am the primary investor and assistant manager of 'snips'. He may look young, but Mr. Snips here is going to be the driving force behind a revolution of beauty in this town of ours, and soon all of Equestria. I assure you this, miss...I'm terribly sorry, dear, but I'm afraid I don't know your name."
"Call me Moxie," the mare said, with a near invisible wink in Snips's direction. "Now then, pleasantries aside, shall we get down to business, as they say?"
The young blue colt led the golden-maned pony over to the gleaming chair in the center of the room, and aided her into the seat. After that, he settled into his routine. He'd performed the acts countless times already; he kept the images of what he'd done before fresh in his mind, and he used them to improve with every customer. Snips pulled his customary basin from the side of the room and used his magic to begin the water's intricate ritual dance. Moxie's soft, fluffy mane absorbed the fine mist as it drifted down from the ceiling, causing it to flatten and cling to her head. She closed her eyes to keep the hair out, and her ears became more sensitive to the rush of red-hot magical energy. She sensed the scissors circling her head, and felt the pull every time they snipped a bit of her mane away. She felt the breeze brought on by the tool's speed, drying out her mane bit by bit. Occasionally there would be a tug from a comb or a gentle prod against her cheek to turn her head a certain way. Through it all, Snips remained silent, focusing only on his task; he needed only to communicate through his magical influence, pouring a little bit of his soul into every clip of his scissors. His aura manifested as a cyclone of blue light, enveloping himself and his chair.
Rarity looked up briefly from her own work on Applejack's mane, her face growing into a contented smirk as the earth pony herself opened her eye to sneak a quick peek. "Oh my, Applejack. Do you see something you like after all?" she said in a barely smug tone.
"Nah, it ain't that. I just...I...what were we talkin' 'bout just now?" the orange mare said, half-entranced.
The stylist could do nothing but giggle to herself as she grasped a towel from a nearby shelf. She tossed it toward Applejack, mentally high-hoofing herself as it landed perfectly on her head. "We're all done, dear. Go ahead and dry yourself off."
As Applejack began running the towel through her mane, it blocked a large part of her vision. So she could only hear the clatter of the stylist tools and brushes as they hit the floor, and the victorious call of the controller of those objects: "The Snips!"
Snips pulled a broom from the corner and ran it smoothly around the chair's pedestal, picking up any errant hair that had fallen from his customer. Once the floor was clean, he offered his hoof to let Moxie down from the seat. She gently laid her hoof in his and slid down to all fours again. The tan earth mare wandered slowly toward the salon's full-length mirror. She looked over her new mane, turning her head around and taking the view in from several angles.
"It's certainly nice. Very nice, actually," Moxie said with a smile in Snips's direction. "It's just a little...flatter...than I'm used to? I guess?"
"Oh! Okay, I can do something for that," Snips announced as his horn lighted up again. "Just stay perfectly still, Ms. Moxie. Things are about to get a little hot."
Snips pulled a fan and a candle from the storeroom right next his private breakroom, and Moxie suddenly realized that his statement was very literal. He pushed the lever on the fan's base and used his magic to amplify the fire. The hot air blew straight into the customer's mane, instantly drying away any moisture that remained sticking to her locks. This caused her mane to fly outward again, poofing back into its original shape save for Snips's efforts. The hair was just slightly shorter now, just with a bit of a curve to the right on top, and with a split in the back that allowed her hair to lay along both sides of her neck. She gave a sly wink to herself in the mirror still in front of her. Once her attentions to herself had been completed, Moxie looked to Snips, who had just finished putting away the fan and extinguishing the candle.
"Mr. Snips," she said softly, "I have never experienced anything like that in my life. You are truly gifted, young colt." The mare lifted her feather duster-esque tail and brushed it with a tickling motion underneath Snips's nose. "I wonder what other...gifts you might have for me?"
She circled him very slowly, as a shark does to its prey, occasionally brushing her immaculate flanks against his side. On her last pass, she leaned her lips close to his ear, whispering a parade of silent proposals that only Snips could hear. And what he heard snapped his eyes wide open and stole his breath. His body froze from the paralysis of shock.
"No, no, no! Absolutely not!" came the instant and startling cry from across the room. Rarity, who had overheard the entire conversation since Snips wrapped up his work, ran over and started pushing Moxie from behind, straight toward the exit. "Madam, I appreciate your business, but I'm afraid I simply must insist that you leave immediately!"
Rarity opened the door and unceremoniously shoved her out, slamming the door behind her. "I mean, the absolute nerve!" she said to the closed up exit. She sighed to herself and turned to the traumatized young colt. "Snips, are you alright?"
Upon hearing Rarity's voice, he shook his head a bit and then nodded. "Oh. Yes, Rarity. I'm...okay. Yes, I'm okay."
"I am so sorry, darling. This is all my fault. I dreaded this sort of thing happening, but I never imagined it actually would."
"Now do y'all see what I was tryin' to say before?" Applejack asked as she deposited her used towel in a basket by the door to Rarity's Boutique, which still housed the laundry room. "Y'all might do well to have some sorta rule list in here to stop this kinda thing from happenin'."
"Yes, you're absolutely right, dear," Rarity replied. "Truth is, I had considered hiring somepony to handle security, but I had faith that ponies in this town would be able to exercise enough self-control that such a thing would be unnecessary. Obviously, that isn't the case after all."
"Well, she wasn't from Ponyville, remember?" Snips said flatly, breaking his own uncomfortable silence. "She said she just got off the train."
Both Applejack and Rarity cringed slightly as his monotone statement. They each glanced in the other's direction, nodding a silent agreement. Rarity walked up to Snips and gave him a short hug in an attempt to calm him down.
"I think it's best if we call it a day. Snips dear, why don't you go home and try to relax?" the unicorn mare gently suggested. "You've been through a lot today. Don't worry, I'll take care of everything here; you just worry about getting yourself back together."
"...Yeah. I...yeah, you're right," Snips responded in a dull whisper. He shuffled his hooves toward the door, which Applejack rushed to open for him. "I'll do that. Rarity...thank you."
He left the shop behind. There were still a good few hours before sunset, but he and his jumbled mind didn't feel like doing anything else today, so he just took off for home. His hooves dragged underneath his body as though he were pulling a set of two-ton boulders, and he couldn't bother lifting his head to look where he was going. By some form of extrasensory navigation, he found his way back to the home of his best friend where he had temporarily taken residence. Snips pushed open the door and looked around with a heavy sigh. Nopony else was home yet, so he just made his way up the stairs and dropped onto his bed in Snails's room. For a decidedly unimportant amount of time, Snips stared up at the ceiling, counting imaginary dots and tracing cracks in the paint, because he didn't feel like doing anything else. He certainly didn't want to think about what had just happened at the salon. The young unicorn was content to just waste the rest of the day just trying to get his head back together.
At some point during his quiet solitude, the door to the bedroom creaked open and a big mass of orange broke into Snips's line of vision. Snails had returned home, and with a long look at Snips on the side, he climbed up into his bed and sat down.
"Hey, Snips," he said gingerly, trying not to instigate a tense situation. "Me and the girls were looking for you today."
"You were looking for me," Snips repeated in a grumbling tone, "but you didn't think to look here before now?"
"Well..." the taller unicorn explained. "We figured you were working at Rarity's place, so we went there just a while ago. But she told us about what happened, and I got back here quick as I could. You okay, pal?"
Snips grabbed a nearby pillow and slammed it over his head. "I really don't want to talk about it," a muffled reply sounded out through the object. "So, what did you do with all your time by yourself today?"
"I wasn't by myself," Snails announced proudly. Snips moved the pillow away and sat up. Even though he was still upset about his own situation, it was his intent to give Snails the courtesy of his attention. "Did a lot of running today...with Scootaloo. Yeah. A lot of running, and a lot of thinking..."
"Can I just stop you for a second?" Snips asked with a hoof pointed right at his friend. "Sweetie Belle and I were talking earlier. We were wondering, what's going on with you two? You've been acting really weird since you started hanging out with her. Plus, you spend all this time together, and it seems like you're getting really close."
"Really?" Snails said with a quizzical tilt in his head. "I had no idea. It just seemed like we're good friends to me. Isn't that...you know...like us...sorta?"
Snips shook his head fervently. "No, Snails. I've seen a lot of that kinda behavior lately...in my...work, and that isn't how good friends act around each other. So...do you like her? Tell me honestly, now."
Snails rubbed his chin thoughtfully and closed his eyes. "I don't know. I do know she likes me, and she's obviously awesome. Hmmm....yeah, I guess so! How about that, huh?"
"Yeah," Snips said with a nod. He was happy for Snails, and didn't want to spoil his mood by bringing up what happened with Apple Bloom today. Let Snails think he was the winner, he thought. "So, what were you gonna say? You were thinking about something?"
Snails's happy look crept away as the sun began setting, fitting the mood of the room. He looked down at a crease in his bedsheets and ran his hoof along it, readying himself for the impending conversation.
"Snips...I thought about this a lot, and I made up my mind. Tomorrow morning...I'm leaving Ponyville." Snails sighed with confusing expression of pain and relief, looking up at the stare of surprise on Snips's face. "Just for the summer, though. I'm going to Canterlot to work in my uncle's restaurant."
"Really? How come you didn't tell me before? Did you just decide this today? Just leaving me--I mean, the whole town, all your friends, for a whole summer?" Snips asked somewhat harshly. "Why?"
"Come on, Snips!" Snails began, matching his friend's intensity. "This is really important! I'm always behind you. The cutie marks, the job. You know? You have your destiny, and as always, I get left behind. I want a destiny too!" He looked down at his hooves despairingly. "I know I keep saying I don't mind being slower, and I can do anything if I keep moving. But...I'm sick of playing catch-up to everypony in our class! I want...I need to find what I'm supposed to do with my life. I gotta do this! You get it, right?"
The blue unicorn sat up straighter on his bed, and brushed his unkempt bed mane out of his eyes. "You're right, Snails," he said with an apologetic glance. "I'm sorry I got so snappy before. I'm still kinda tense because of what happened. You sure you want to do this though? Seems like a lot of unnecessary pressure."
"Yeah, I do," the orange pony replied. "I talked it over with Mom and Dad, too, and they think it'll be good for me."
"What about Scootaloo? You've gotten so close the last few weeks. How do you think she's gonna react when you tell her you're leaving for the whole summer?" Snips asked.
"It'll be fine. She's a tough little filly, you know. What, do you think she's gonna cry or something?" Snails laughed, but quickly became silent again. "Although, she might hit me a few times. Guess I should get ready for that."
"Yeah," Snips said, thankful that Snails was there to pick up his mood, and make him laugh again. "Snails, you're my best friend. And if this is what you want to do, I'm with you 100%. You have to come back and tell me all about it, alright?"
"You know it," Snails said with a beaming grin. He looked out the window and noticed the now fully darkened town of Ponyville. He yawned loudly and settled back into his bed. "Well, I'm gonna turn in for the night. Big day tomorrow."
Snips caught his friend's infectious yawn and laid his head down on his discarded pillow. Tomorrow, he would have to face an entirely new day. A day where his best friend was going to be leaving for an the whole summer season. A day where he would no doubt have to face the terrors of the salon once again. A day where he would have his first date with the filly of his dreams. He lowered his eyelids and let out one more exhale before drifting into a state of deep sleep..
"Right...Big day...Good night, Snails." |
The Huntress of Equestria | pre | Twilight began to stand up. She hadn't let one of these large things fight her for long. Usually they just killed her if they got a hit in. She didn't entirely know how she was going to beat it now though, not with her legs like jelly. Hell, she never knew what to do when she really got hurt.
Unfortunately, she found herself not sure whether or not that may matter. Instead, she was being clutched by the beast's large hand. It's long, thin claws crushed against her ribs, squeezing her lungs and ripping the air out of her.
When she did open her eyes, she could see into the beast's eyes, staring at her with a red fury. Apparently, it had taken exception to her taunts. It was not something she planned to do when she fought it again.
Fortunately, she thought as she looked at her free arm, she might not need to fight this thing again. She raised her gun as the beast growled in her face, her bones cracking under the stress. She ignored it though, gritting her teeth as she squeezed on the trigger.
There was a loud crack, before an unholy scream. Twilight slammed against the ground, feeling her ribs come back together because of the things blood. It was probably a good thing too, because otherwise, she was on the brink of blacking out, and she needed to focus on other things then consciousness.
Her gun fell from her hand as she reached out to the cart she'd thought about before. It was definitely the largest thing she'd tried doing this to so far, but it was the only thing that was gonna finish him off.
Her purple aura slowly came around the carriage as the beast continued to reel in pain. It had been cut, bludgeoned, beaten, and lit on fire. It had never had its eye shot out though.
A creak brought its attention down, and, while standing at its full height, it simply stared at the floating carriage. It was kind of pretty, especially with the purple sparks that came off of it. And hey, it was even getting clo-
Crash!
Twilight collapsed onto the ground, listening to the beast's howl as it got farther and farther away. Down and down, all the way into the abyss it deserved to be in. She could feel her bones begin to knit as she suspected it died, and something told her it wasn't coming back, unlike all the others.
No, she had won, and her first real beast was gone. It had barely gone down, and, if she hadn't been smart, she would have lost, easily. She would need to get a lot better before she regularly faced things like that.
She was alive though, and able to move, and so she slowly got back to her feet. Something turned her head to the closed gate at the end of the bridge, and she couldn't help but smile at the lamp that sat there. It invited her to rest, and to heal, things she was very ready to do.
She flicked it on, feeling her wounds slowly close as the light from the lantern restored her. "Not that I need to go back the way I came from. Father Gasc-"
She stopped, staring across the bridge, before she whispered, "His daughter..."
A)Escort the girl to her father
B)Grab her father, and hope he doesn't try to murder her again. Twilight or the daughter.
Acquired: Combat levitation, and the Sword Hunter's Badge. Only need 3 votes, instead of the normal 5, to switch to the Kirkhammer.
Owns: 10 bullets (acquired some on the way to the Cleric Beast) |
The Huntress of Equestria | A Shift In The Nightmare | Twilight felt her stomach lurch as she stepped out of the world in between the graves, appearing within Oed0n Tomb. She fell to one of her knees, her hand tight on her side as she looked up, sweat pouring down her face. It was like she'd just caught a fever, and at this point, she wouldn't even be surprised.
Looking up though, she saw it was much... better than that. It was confirmation of a hypothesis of hers. That shade she'd seen back at the Hunter's Workshop didn't like her being here, something that she'd only chalked up to the desire these beings had to take over Equestria. Now though...
Twilight smiled, slowly standing up tall as she gazed upon the shifting fogs around her. Sure, she still felt weak, but when one does something great, they should make sure they watch their handiwork, instead of shunning its effects.
And the large beastman, twice her size, with claws half as long as her short cleaver, that screamed at her face made her quite proud of her accomplishment. This was Gascoigne, she could feel it. It was what she had stopped. What the music box had put to rest.
And now she was watching as this hell tried to handle it. Tried to deal with the change to it. A course of events it couldn't reconcile, or just reset like the Cleric Beast. No, Twilight had denied whatever the fog had wanted to do in this place, and it sent chills of joy down her spine. She could do something here, instead of just being helpless to the beasts she faced.
The only problem she had with her joy was that while she could see she was denying these beings of their game, she still didn't know how it happened, or what the fog caused in the first place. She shouldn't be able to see Gascoigne fall in this beastial form just as much as her ability to revive back at the lamps made no sense.
For a moment, the hair around Twilight's eye darkened before she brought a hand up, covering the pain. Calm down, Twilight. If you worry about this too much, you'll go insane. This place is of pain, destruction, and for me to comprehend it... She shook her head, dismissing the thoughts. There was no reason to dwell while she had a little girl to help.
She strode out of the tomb, heading back to the study that she had left Gascoigne. She'd been gone for maybe an hour at most, and that was while being extremely generous. Still, he was a pretty hardy old man, a pain in her neck reminding her just how true that was, so he could have woken up and walked off. The thought worried her, as she didn't know how she had calmed him before, and doing the same trick twice didn't always seem to work with this place.
Of course, to go with how terrible this place was, Gascoigne was indeed gone. Twilight rushed forward, knocking over some of the books and a chair as she tried to go to where he'd been. Placing a hand on the seat of the chair, she cursed, having hoped that maybe, just maybe he had somehow gone invisible. No luck though.
And then, she sniffed. Immediately she knew the sort of smell in the air, as she'd had it cling to her clothes all too often back at the magic circles in Canterlot. Incense, and it was powerful. So thick in fact was its potency, even like this, that she could taste its magic. It was a welcoming feeling, or it would be if it wasn't where a father had been.
Fortunately, there was ladder, and she clambered up it, not caring about her hooves or bumping into the sides of the small hole it led into. Instead, she only kept her eyes forward, watching for any sign of the man she hoped to call friend.
And, there, halfway in a slightly ajar, well decorated door, was Gascoigne. Her horn lit up, but not to grab the hunter. Instead, Twilight used it to try to grip whatever had him, only bringing a small, strangled scream from the other side of the door. Her magic immediately dispelled itself as she threw open the heavy door, the muscles in her arm screaming as she looked down.
A man looked back, covered in a simple, dirty, full length cloak. His face was covered by the cowl of the gray cloth, as well as his hands, which were thrown up in obvious terror. Under his breath, Twilight could hear him mutter about how he knew he shouldn't have left his chapel, and looked up.
Before her was a tall building, its vaulted ceiling at least a hundred feet above her. Balconies looked down upon her, their banisters cracked, but made of fine marble. Looking back to the open space before her, she could see small stairs lead up to a vaulted middle area where she could see an orator giving a speech to all of those around there that occupied the lower parts of the chapel.
And coating all of it: ash. The incense in the air was still just as powerful as before, probably due to the man who cowered below her having been the one to always set up the magical wards. In fact, Twilight could even see to her right a small area with at least ten pots of burning incense with a space inbetween them for someone to lay down, sleep, and probably pray at.
Twilight looked back down, before crouching towards the poor, pale man. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you, but I'm used to this place having so many wicked people that I assumed you might be hurting my friend. Now, why don't I help you move him."
The man nodded furiously, weakly crawling away from Twilight. She could hear his labored breathing and felt bad for him for a moment. How long had he been here? How much had this possible act of kindness hurt him, especially for trying to get a body up the ladder behind her? It only made her attack on him all the worse.
Not that he seemed to mind as he gestured to one the banisters on the corners of the raised platform. It warmed her heart that he would put Gascoigne above himself, and the banister would allow him to sit up, so he might be a little more comfortable like this, even if the chair might have been softer.
Twilight set him down, before going to the middle of the platform where she had spotted one of her small lamps. It seemed a little silly for there to be one here with another at the tomb, but then again...
Twilight breathed in deeply, sighing out as she heard the name 'Oedon Chapel' ring in her ears. It welcomed her home, and her magic sparked, excited to be past Central Yharnam at least. She only had one more thing to take care of there, and then she could just head forward.
The small man cleared his throat, before the act made him cough. After the small fit though, he did speak. "D-Do not worry about your friend. I just wanted to bring him to where my incense could protect him, as the beasts seem to hate the scent. In fact," a small smile slipped onto his face, "I'm happy to see that you enjoy it."
Twilight smiled, her eyes darting to her fur covered hands. It was nice to have a way now to possibly show someone that she was safe, instead of them just having to believe that she would become what Gascoigne could have, or at least what the Nightmare Fog had shown her he could. "And I thank you for trying to help him. If I can return the favor, then please, do not hesitate to call upon Twilight the Huntress."
Her tongue ran across her lips, slightly enjoying the title, before it turned bitter. She supposed it was much like how these hunters ended up. Even that nice one...
The man nodded, returning to his little alcove as he spoke. "It's nice to meet you, and my name is of no import. I simply seek to protect myself and others, so if you wish to help me, tell those you find who seek somewhere safe that they may come here."
Twilight nodded, already having two people in mind to possibly bring here, even if one was... rude, to say the least. "I'll keep it in mind. For now though, I should head back. I have someone to go grab for my friend."
"Oh, is it Henryk?" The dweller recoiled as Twilight sharply turned back to him, and he waved his hands. "I-It was the name your friend was saying in his sleep. If that's not the case, than that's fine."
Twilight bit into her cheek. She'd heard the name before, but she couldn't put it together. She thanked the distraction though as she headed down the ladder and back to the tomb, She would grab the chest later, but a little girl was waiting for her and-
The screech of metal against stone interrupted her thoughts, before a male and female voice, the latter which sounded possibly familiar, shouted at each other.
"They didn't deserve! He good man!"
"Just like you are, while you try to mindlessly rip me apart. You can barely speak you're so close to transforming. Besides, do you really think it wasn't his hand that killed her?"
"Shut up, birdy!"
Twilight ran out, her eyes wide as she watched the two below her. Neither were going to notice her up here, not with how they were locked in combat. The crow woman was indeed back, her twin daggers flashing as she danced around the other hunter. However, any blow that caught under the insane man's yellow clothes brought little blood out, and Twilight knew first hand how fragile she was.
And, as the man's Saw Cleaver shredded a tombstone, Twilight knew the fight could go either way. The man had talked about them, and him, and a good man... Had he seen the corpse of Gascoigne's wife? Could this man, as far gone as he was... be Henryk?
She would need to make a choice soon though, before they made it for her.
1) Join sides with the man who may be Henryk to take care of the 'Hunter of Hunters' who had killed her before.
2) Join the crow clad hunter against her foe. Twilight at least knew she had good intentions, and this man was too far gone for reason.
3) Wait for one to die, before coming down to finish off the other. They both were threats, and she could get something useful off of their corpses.
4) Stop the two fools. I've changed this place's fate once, so maybe I can do it again and find out who this man really is, while also saving the feather covered woman again. |
The Huntress of Equestria | Eileen and Henryk | Eileen stepped into Oeden Tomb. She'd heard... sounds before. Cries of beasts, the ripping of flesh, all done with more noise than any hunter was taught to do. At least, not the ones she went after, for the noise could attract more, and the more there were, the less likely you were to survive. Only she had mastered the art of fighting multiple threats, but she blamed that more on her weapons.
A glance over the tombstones brought her eyes to an all too familiar yellow. Her head twisted around, checking for another, but none came to her practiced eyes. No, he was alone... "Oh, Henryk, please don't tell me you did this?"
The yellow figure lifted its head. It was on the roof of a small cabin within the tomb where a caretaker used to live. It would be deserted now, but she could see the body that he'd been standing over. It was a woman's body, and Eileen felt her stomach churn at the thought of who it could be.
The man fell from the roof, landing rough on his feet and stumbling. He clawed at his head as he regained his balance, and Eileen could feel tears prick the edges of her eyes. No, she had to be tough. If she wasn't, he would become worse than a turned hunter, and she would not allow that to happen. "Hello, Henryk."
The man scowled, raising up his Saw Cleaver to his side. "Violet... You... Eileen, too far!"
With a howl, Henryk charged forward, leaping with his cleaver into the air. By the time he landed though, Eileen was long gone from the spot, and it found only gravestones.
Eileen scowled, the stench from him surprisingly small. Maybe...
Eileen paused for a moment as she realized the truth and yelled, "I didn't do this! Gascoigne was gone before I could even find him!"
Henryk didn't listen, just like all of the rest. Instead, he just screamed his insanity. Soon, he wouldn't even be able to do that much. "They didn't deserve! He good man!"
What Twilight hadn't seen was him whip around, slicing through the side of Eileen's cloak and painting the tombstones with her blood, before she whipped around his side, her daggers raking him back, but to much less of an effect. Was she really this weak? "Just like you are, while you try to mindlessly rip me apart. You can barely speak you're so close to transforming. Besides, do you really think it wasn't his hand that killed her?"
This time she stepped out of the way of his swing, his witty retort only making her scowl. "Shut up, Birdy!"
He couldn't even recognize her. Somehow that hurt more than any wound she'd taken.
She looked back up, that cleaver coming around again. Why was she so distracted? Why was she so slow? Why couldn't she just do her job?
The sound of metal against stone brought her out of her thoughts, as well as words being screamed into the air.
"Henryk, stop! Gascoigne is alive!"
Eileen looked up, staring at a familiar figure. It was the beast hunter, the one with purple hair. She had a name... Twilight, that was it. No, she couldn't be here. Not again! The poor girl didn't deserve to have to get tied up in her mess. "Don't try it. He's too far gone, especially for lies."
Twilight glanced up, feeling the slab of stone on her back take another hit, and this time she didn't have the help of focus to keep her from stepping forward, slamming into the crow hunter as she stabbed the ground with the blade in her hand, barely stopping herself.
She glanced back, seeing Henryk standing there, silent for a moment. Yes, her words were working. At least, until the crow hunter whipped around her. "Leave the hunting of hunters to me, young one."
Twilight scowled, picking her blade out of the soft ground and bringing it around in a long arc, catching Eileen's blade with hers, and stopping both from heading towards Henryk. She was just happy she'd picked up the new weapon, as it was definitely going to help for this. "I'm not lying! He's just a bit ahead, and I won't let you kill his brother."
Henryk looked up, staying his hand again as he lifted his cleaver. Brother? He had no brother. Gascoigne had been close to one, but he was dead now! He shot forward, wanting the pest gone, and ignoring the blade that cut across his side, his cleaver now slamming into the purple thing, its serrated teeth embedding themselves into the girl's clothes before he launched her away by swinging up.
Eileen launched herself forward, cutting in an X with her twin daggers, slicing open his back, before dodging back just as he tried to cut her. He was slowing down.
And then, a small rock slammed into the back of Henryk's skull. A pebble. A fucking pebble, the most useless of the tools in a hunter's belt. Yes, the pest would-
He looked up, seeing three tombstones over him. The first landed flat on his chest, shoving him to the ground, before the next two did the same, knocking the wind out of him as the pest yelled, "Do you not care about your niece?"
Niece? Brother? He had no family. He'd never been as lucky as Gascoigne in that way. He'd been lucky that Voilet even let him near...
Carol.
Eileen stepped forward, raising her daggers, and getting ready to finish off Henryk. It was for his own good-
Bang!
Henryk looked up, his vision clearing. Eileen... Eileen was just shot, after she was going to kill him. But she only did that to... "Ei-Eileen, please, don't. I'm..." It was so hard to breathe, with so much weight on his chest. If he could get it off.
"Henryk, is that actually you?"
The purple hunter's voice. The one that said Gascoigne was alive. That he was... He looked up, spotting a limp arm hanging off the roof.
His friend needed him. In a tremendous show of force, he shoved the three tombstones off of him, before raising his cleaver, blocking Eileen's jumping stab, before swiping her away, and then...
And then throwing his weapon away from himself. "Eileen, stop!"
Eileen looked up, staring at Henryk, and in his eyes... clarity.
Twilight watched as they both looked to her, her chest in pain from the slash from Henryk. She'd been right that any hit from him was going to be devastating, but she hadn't expected to be hit herself. Not that it mattered now. They both had stopped fighting, which was all she wanted.
Twilight slowly stepped forward, and the crow hunter grabbed Henryk's arm as his whole body had tensed up. "She's not a beast, I promise. In fact," she looked to Twilight, "it appears that you've saved me twice now."
Twilight smiled as Henryk looked from the other hunter and then to her, and nodded. She... she had allies, or at least, she hoped that much. Now, she just needed to inform them on the situation. "Gascoigne is ahead in Oeden Chapel. A kind man has made an incense that pushes away the beasts, so he's safe there and sleeping, though I don't know how he'll be when he wakes up."
Henryk crossed his arms, scowling as he shook his head. "A temporary measure. Nothing stops the beasts forever except the end of the hunt. Trust me."
The crow hunter nodded in agreement. "Still, if it gives him time to heal, it would be best to use something that's proven for the moment, even if one of us has to stay to protect him."
Twilight bit into her cheek. The crow was right, but that caused a problem in her own plans. "Well, why don't one of you stay with him then, and the other comes with me? I'm on my way to get his daughter so she can be with her father instead of... " Twilight glanced up, and both other hunters cringed.
Henryk looked to his friend, before stepping towards Twilight. "Eileen, you stay with him. Defending a single spot will be easier-"
"Says the man who almost lost his mind. Why should I trust you with a child, especially when travelling through the hunt is my specialty."
"And actually killing things is mine!"
Twilight swallowed hard. It was somewhat obvious that neither would back off from their stance of being better, so she would need to break up their argument. Only question was who she trusted more with what job.
1) Bring Henryk. He's the girl's uncle, and his strength will help, even if he could go crazy.
2) Bring Eileen. Her speed and knowledge could get them back faster, but if they got into a prolonged fight, it could mean trouble. |
The Huntress of Equestria | Carol | Chink
Twilight pulled her sword out of the slab of stone on her back, blinking as visions of older hunters cleared from her eyes, and Eileen sliced in a flurry of blows through the mob of crows near Carol. They didn't want another case of her first meeting with the little girl after all.
As Eileen came back, Twilight was trying out a few practice swings, before she swung, planted her foot on the ground as her blade went behind her back. It slid into the slab of stone like it was being sheathed, before she jammed it to the side, locking it into position. Using the base she'd made, she spun, throwing her whole weight into her next swing. The sword followed, now coming around as a sledgehammer.
And throwing Twilight five feet with the momentum as it crashed into the ground.
A bit of laughter brought a hint of red to Twilight's cheeks, before Eileen stood over her, offering the poor mare a hand. "I don't blame you. I stick to my daggers because I prefer their weight, but I also know that if you can master the Kirkhammer, you'll be able to smash your way through anything."
Twilight rubbed her neck, feeling the hyperextension that had happened with the swing fading, just like any injury on her, especially one not caused by another enemy. This was all caused by Eileen having put her daggers away as they'd slipped out of Oeden. When she pulled them out again, it was only one, until she 'switched' it.
As Twilight was told, all hunter weapons are called 'trick weapons'. Said trick is that they all have a second form. Some have a hinge they rely on, like the Saw Cleaver, while others could fit into different parts of themselves to form brand new weapons, such as the twin daggers of what Eileen called The Blades of Mercy, or a sledgehammer out of a sword like the Kirkhammer.
Twilight pushed herself up, putting the slab of stone back onto her back before forcing it out with a slight wince. Yeah, she doubted she would use the tricked form of this one much, not when it winded her just to lift the slab of metal. It did become surprisingly light on her back, but she put that to the fact that anything she picked up just vanished into a bag that she just knew she had, even if she couldn't find it. "Yeah, maybe, but for now I think I'll just stick to the shortsword."
Eileen grinned as she stepped away, beckoning Twilight to follow her. "Come now. You need to grab Carol. From her house, go as far down as you can. You'll hit a sewer. Following it will bring you almost all the way to Oeden Tomb, and I'll be waiting for you at the end of it to make sure you find the ladder."
Twilight frowned as they came up to the gate. "Wait, you're not sticking with us?"
Eileen shook her head as she slipped onto the ladder just past Gascoigne's home, looking over her shoulder where they both could see a giant akin to the ones with slabs of cement on their hands there. It used more of a large club though, and Twilight sighed as she thought about how fun it would be to kill it.
Eileen crushed that worry as she said, "I'm used to fighting by myself, and you'll be burdened with Carol. Therefore, I'll go ahead and clear the path. Understand?"
Twilight nodded, watching as Eileen launched herself from the ladder, becoming a missile of death as she dove towards the giant. The sound of its neck cracking made Twilight cringe, but also made her certain that Eileen was fine. It was hunters that caused the woman trouble anyways.
"Unicorn, is that you?"
Twilight smiled, before she moved to the window. "Yes, it's me Carol, and I'm here to take you to your father. He's somewhere where you'll be a lot safer, and... and it's best you be with him right now."
"Oh.... Dad usually doesn't like us wanting to join in his hunts, but I guess I could leave a note for Viola to let her know I'm with dad."
Twilight's brow furrowed as she heard the name. Neither Henryk or Eileen had mentioned a second daughter, or was it some sort of nanny? "Carol, sweetie, whose Viola, and where is she? You uncle and father would probably want to have her with them as well."
"Uncle Henryk's with dad too? Oh, I wonder if he has any treats with him. He usually at least has hard candy. He says he carries it because he's bad at talking to people."
That seems to be a running theme with these hunters. "Carol, please, focus. Where and who is Viola?"
"Oh," the little girl said as she came around from the other side of the bend, "she's my sister, but she's probably at the Healing Church right now. That's where she always at at this time at night, getting taught how to be like dad."
Twilight blinked. The girl, maybe ten or twelve years of age, came up to her stomach. She wore a simple blue jacket over a black shirt, leading into a gray dress skirt. Around her neck was a beautiful white ribbon, and the girl even held onto a teddy bear. It was almost heartbreaking to think about the fact that this little girl would soon be losing her innocence.
Twilight knelt down, offering her back to the girl. "Come on, I'll carry you down the ladders." This was something easier said than done. As Twilight had been reminded of earlier, she wasn't exactly the strongest mare in the world. Maybe if she were Applejack she could handle at least a hundred feet of ladders, if not more to get to the bottom of the sewers, with a child on her back, but by the time her feet stepped into the water and mud at the bottom, she had to let the little girl down and lean against a wall, breathing hard as her muscles burned.
Carol frowned as she looked at Twilight. It reminded her of so many nights when her dad would come home from the hunt. The unicorn didn't look half as strong as daddy though, so she probably could use a pick me up. Now, she knew her dad liked stiff drinks, fervent prayers, or playing with her when he needed to relax, but she doubted the unicorn would want any of those, especially with how urgent she made everything sound like it was.
And then, seeing a small, silver shine from the middle of the room, Carol remembered how much her dad liked cleaning his bullets while he told stories about the night to all of them.
Twilight looked around the wall, looking down the sewer. In all honesty, it was a rather impressive construction. Large, stone walls to make sure the scent stayed down here, with walkways along the sides for workers to walk on and stay out of the majority of the gunk. She could even tell where stairs would help them move different levels of the sewage levels.
Looking farther, she could see a torch come into view, shining off of a metal face. So she had gone the right way. She just needed to grab Carol and take her there.
"Hey, Twilight, look what I found!"
Looking to Carol, Twilight's heart froze. Eileen was a hunter of hunters, and took no pleasure in the slaughter of beasts like the rest of her kin. It was one of the many factors that made sure she would never become like the beasts her marks were like. She also was fast and direct, usually trying to end fights in a single flurry of fast blows.
As such, she didn't deviate her path, such as going to the middle of a square room of the sewers where a little girl held aloft a set of quicksilver bullets, and about seven creatures that were sleeping in the mud that looked up at said girl.
Twilight shot forward like a rocket, her sword drawn as the first raised its hand. Her blade intercepted it, but instead of cutting into the gelatinous monster, it simply forced the arm back down, hurting it a bit. Carol screamed in her ears, but Twilight couldn't focus on that. She spotted a few more monsters in the back of the room take notice of the two of them.
A back cut got three of them, deterring them from attacking yet, but that left two more who were already acting, and soon she would hope that more than one of them was staring into the sky when the second wave got to her.
Her blade caught one arm, while the other hand slammed into her chest. For a moment, Twilight thought her ribs were cracking, before she took a step back. They were probably bruised, and it explained their speed. Slow, but infuriatingly strong. If even just one of them hit Carol, the poor girl would be doomed.
Her eyes glanced back as a cold calm came over Twilight. One behind her, two in front of her, and one to the side of both Carol were all getting ready to attack. Twilight could see the torch in the distance moving. It was fast, but she had seen how Eileen had fought. Fast, with blows that could devastate a person by targeting their most vital points, and the woman had even admitted that she used to be almost unmatched when she was younger, but age and her own code had dulled her speed, just like it had Gascoigne's sanity and Henryk's intelligence.
Even then, she doubted Eileen could get there in time. She was too far away. There were too many of them, and they were too tough. Maybe if the two of them had baited them together, only fighting one or two at a time, but like this...
Twilight shut her eyes, her mind burning. She was going to die, but that didn't matter. She was a hunter. She would go back to the dream. Carol was only a child, and if they got her...
Twilight didn't feel herself move at first. It reminded her of with Gascoigne, where she had lost control of her own body. Her blade came up, slipping into the hammer on her back. Instincts showed her the wave of damage that came with its slams, and Twilight's body acted, bring it straight down.
The crash of water against it filled Twilight's ears, her eyes still shut to the force she could feel around her. Her horn was at maximum power, having joined in with the rest of this instinct, helping the hammer come down.
From the echos that came into Twilight, she knew she had done it. Knew she had stopped all of the-
Twilight had opened her eyes to where her hammer had fallen. Right in front of her, or, in other words, right where Carol was... or had been.
She let the hammer fall to its side, and almost was happy that there was no corpse to be seen. Twilight didn't need one though, not when there was a neatly folded ribbon there that was as white as snow.
Eileen limped in front of Twilight, her breathing heavy as she asked, "Twilight, what happened?" She waited a few moments for a report, the knot in her stomach growing. The hunter wasn't blind, but she had gotten used to such tragedies long ago. The beast in front of her on the other hand... "Twilight, I'm sorry. I should have made sure there was nothing here. Children wander, and I should have-"
"No... No." Twilight slowly picked up the ribbon, breathing in deep as tears ran down her cheeks. "It was my responsibility. She was with me, and... and it'll be my responsibility to tell Gascoigne."
Eileen slowly nodded, before letting the walk be a quiet one. For a moment, she'd thought about talking about how she'd done this plenty of times in training with Gascoigne and their master, but something stopped her. Probably just the pain of having failed in such a long time she assumed.
It didn't take long for them to get back to the chapel. The only thing Eileen had let live from the large room to here, were the two gangly beasts outside of the tomb, and they were nothing for the two hunters. Twilight almost wished they were.
Walking into the chapel was harder though, as Twilight could feel her legs turn to lead as she looked up. Gascoigne was standing now, using the the banister to support his weight as him and Henryk talked. From what little she could hear, it sounded like they were happy, even... even catching up.
They stopped dead as Eileen and Twilight walked up, the ribbon still in Twilight's hand. She didn't even get a word out before Henryk reached for his cleaver, spitting the words, "You beast," with enough venom to make the mare ill.
Gascoigne on the other hand held up a hand, stopping his friend. His shoulders were shaking, but his face held no emotion as he looked into Twilight's eyes. Twilight swallowed hard, trying to square her shoulder and meet his gaze back. He deserved that much. "Carol got away from us for just a moment, but-"
Henryk stepped forward, smacking Twilight across the face as he screamed, "You didn't carry her? You didn't make sure she never left your side? Why did I trust you for a second?"
"Henryk." Gascoigne looked up at his friend, and for a moment Twilight felt that, despite the fact that she could now seek Henryk's face properly, and the dozens of wrinkles that pocketed the old man's feature's, he was not the one in charge between the two. "It was a mistake. We made plenty of those when we were learning. It's best we make sure she doesn't forget this one."
Twilight swallowed hard as Gascoigne stood tall. She would turn away from him when he struck her down. She would take the blow like a good student. It's what happened when you messed up after all.
"Attack me."
For a moment all of them were silent, before Eileen was the first to speak, whispering, "You're not serious, right?"
Henryk simply leaned back, nodding solemnly. "I understand. It is more fitting after everything after all."
Twilight looked up at Gascoigne, seeing cold steel in his eyes. She would not convince him of otherwise, and, from what seemed to happen to hunters with little else, maybe she would be doing him a favor. She brought her sword up high, tensing her muscles to bring it down,
And Gascoigne flipped his gun up from his side, putting the blunderbuss to Twilight's chest. With one blast she was knocked to the ground in an oddly familar fashion. Gascoigne stood over her, his now open hand flexing open. "If you fire upon someone when they swing, you can throw them off, staggering them. While they're open, you can reach back, and rip them apart."
And, just like the first time the two had fought, though now with Twilight seeing images of hunters performing the same technique a hundred times to teach her, he reached in, crushing her heart in one swift movement.
The normal darkness came around her before she could feel that something was wrong. She wasn't going back to Hunter's Dream again. Was it because of Henryk? Because she was continuing to defy the dream.
She would never find out, as the shadowed hunter appeared for only a moment, before his form was mixed with stars and traces of a deep, dark blue that called to Twilight, before it pulled him away.
And for just a moment, Twilight had felt Equestria again, before she woke back up in Oeden Chapel, and all three of the hunters she'd wanted to call friends were gone. She shut her eyes, tears coming down her face as she remembered she wasn't in Equestria, and she wasn't about to find a new set of elements or anything like that.
She was a hunter in a nightmare, and like all hunters apparently, she too would be a monster before this dream was over.
Once again so lost, with so many ways to go, from people back in Yharnam to check on to the two doors in Oeden, she cannot decide, and needs some guidance. Leave your comments below for what you think Twilight should do next. |
Fall of Equestria: Throes of Winter | pre | Rainbow felt a lot of stress leave her body as the water poured down from the showerhead, finally able to scrub all the filth and dried semen off of her. How long had it been since she was able to shower like this? She had been tossed back and forth from caribou handler to male master to even one of their dumb war beasts! She never had a chance to herself; it felt too long ago to remember. But by Celestia's plot, did it feel great to get clean again. Scrubbing the soap and lofa over her back, hips, legs, and arms never felt so refreshing. So euphoric. So.... vulnerable.
Yes, even in this small moment of bliss, a larger part of paranoia plagued her mind. It unnerved her how exposed she was. That at any moment, she was expecting some stallion or caribou to barge right in, slam her into the toilet and ruin her body more while robbing her small glimpse of freedom. Or worse, having Sombra come in to do just that...
'Damn them' she cursed internally. She shouldn't have to feel like this! The constant fear that something normal as showering could go wrong. A linger dread thanks to the caribou's corruption. Better to enjoy this while she could. It hopefully wouldn't be the last once she and the other rebels got into action to get rid of these bastards once and for all.
Turning off the showerhead, she stepped out to wipe off some of the fog on the mirror to get a better look at herself. Aside from the few bruises and dark circles under her eyes, she looked alright. It looked better compared to the makeup they put on her so that it could smear from the tears whenever they forced blunt objects or dicks down her throat.
"Nuugh," she shuddered, wrapping the towel around her body before brushing her mane. She shook her head to flick her multicolored hair into its natural messy state, just her style. She noticed a few strands of her main stood out, probably from all the pulling and tearing whenever she took it up doggy style, some of them forcing her to look at herself in the mirror. Grinding her teeth while rubbing her head, she longed to get these degrading images and events out of her head.
"Room Service!"
Well, as Rarity would put it, 'Nothing better to relax the mind with tea and a bit of yoga.'
Rainbow Dash poked her head out to see Sombra thanking the maidservant for bringing them dinner. He then abruptly dismissed her when she offered her vagina or tits to use, slamming the door in her face.
That was another thing she admired about Sombra. The dark unicorn was one of the few males left that didn't just freely cram his dick into everything that walked. She assumed it must be taking a lot of mental restrain, considering the major bulge present in his tight leather pants. However resilient he may be, Sombra was still a stallion... with a rather large member by her estimation.
'Gah! What am I doing!?'
Averting her eyes from below Sombra's belt, Rainbow popped out from behind the bathroom door, eying at the tray of food instead. Her mouth instantly watered over the cup of freshly cut lettuce, some breadsticks, and two cups of tea. The food was nothing special, much like the rest of this sorry excuse for an establishment. But compared to the shit and stomach-lurching food she had to gorge on, it was a well-crafted dish by a master chef. She looked up at Sombra, almost about to ask if she could have a piece. In return, he gave her a confused look. Blushing, she would take a piece of the romaine lettuce and eat it slowly and thoughtfully, savoring the taste of real food. Boy, did it taste good...
"What's this?"
His voice interrupted the moment of satisfying hunger, causing her to gulp her mouthful down to answer him. "Huh?"
He was reading a newspaper, having requesting one with the room service. He pointed to the headline of one article;
"PREPARE! FOR THE GREATEST DISPLAY OF SLUTS THIS SEASON AT THE PONYVILLE WINTER!! WINTER IS CUMMING!!"
"Shit! the Ponyville Winter Parade... Ugh, didn't expect to be happening so soon!"
"Winter Parade?"
"It's an annual parade the caribou do. Every year before Hearth Warming's Eve, King Dainn 'graces' Ponyville with his presence to celebrate the holiday with a parade filled with mares in lingerie, snow outfits, and other stupid shit. They get their hottest cattle together for all the men to get off to while on floats. At the end of the parade, he'll be on the last float with the royal princesses, allowing all his subjects to fuck them in honor for their 'glorious' victory," she explained, on the verge of hurling out each sentence.
Sombra's expression narrowed as he gazed at the picture associated with the article. It showed a lean caribou with a crown on his head holding a sword, while beneath his hooves were lewd depictions of Celestia and Luna. Lightning glowed from his blue pupilless eyes; his head held high to display his neck and chest, hefty fur covering his cloak.
'This is their leader?' he thought, questioning the drawing's accurate depiction. Even with how godly they drew him, Dainn still looked rather frail and small compared to the other caribou he's encountered. How in the world did such a scranny thing rule over a herd of warmongers? And what were these glowing auras of electricity from his eyes and hand? Was this truly a display of his power, or was he that far up his ass to boast ones that didn't exist?! Something about him was definitely misconceived here. This was just a portrait for a newspaper, after all...
"Sounds like the perfect opportunity to assassinate him..." He commented.
"That was the plan," Rainbow Dash nodded, anger raising her voice. "King Dainn rarely leaves Canterlot. Too busy living up in the castle, jerking off and using whatever cumrag was available. The parade is our only opportunity to slay him and rescue the princesses..."
"Until they caught you.."
"Yeah yeah, don't remind me," she flustered. "Things could have changed, and the resistance may have a new plan in mind. Last I remember, there were only a few of us. Applejack, Pinkie, Maud, and I were going to be the ones to do it. And we could have done it too! We were scouting the perfect rendevous point until that one fuck-twit stallion spotted and reported us! Now... now I just really hope I was the only one they captured." The rainbow maned mare took a sip of her tea to calm her nerves.
"But hey, suppose the leader allows you into ou regiment. How do you plan to assist us? It's been like, what? Three weeks since you popped out of the ground? Surely, some of your magic has replenished."
Sombra nodded. Before, he could barely hold himself together, too cautious of casting a spell that might break his body apart. Even his mental stale resembled that of a feral animal, desperate for food and shelter from the harsh winter winds. Now, he felt like he could start an onslaught with the caribou soldiers and immerge victoriously. The dark stallion couldn't recall the last time he was this invigorated. He felt stronger, wiser, far more capable. It's like he had retaught himself how to walk again after suffering a vigorous injury. Why he figured with even more training, he could surpass the magical prowess of Celestia in her prime! Still, he suspected a gap between himself and the caribou king; what with his supposed 'outlandish' magic. Sombra had a timeframe to meet before bringing the pinnacle of his spells to battle. Should the resistance provide aid in vanquishing this usurper, Equestria would be fully within grasp.
"Hmm," he murmured in thought while finishing his cup of tea. "It would be unwise to request my allegiance without establishing trust. I'm sure you still have your doubts," the tyrant noted, making the pegasus shift her head to the side. "If you have any suggestions on how best to approach your comrades, do tell me."
"You're asking me? Look, even if I go into great detail on why allowing you in would be a huge advantage, it's not gonna stop everypony from viewing the tyrannical overlord that once tried twice to impression an entire empire."
He scoffed. "Well, if they want an actual chance in survival, they'll let this 'tyrannical overlord' show them the path to victory."
"Mmm, I don't know. I don't think we have enough space for all that inflated ego there, Sombrero," Rainbow mused, earning a light snicker from the former king.
"Oh, I'm sure you'll find ample room within~."
The two shared a rare laugh before continuing to finishing their meal. Sombra remained silent while his thinking over this small moment of peace. How long had it been since he last enjoyed the company of another? For all his time commanding subjects and fighting foes, the dark unicorn never had a chance to settle down like this. Was it... possible he could-
'No,' he reassured himself with a shake of his head. 'It's too late for that possibility. This is but a rare moment of respite. Thing's will only get tougher from here. We need to be careful, not hopeful. And hope is rare to find as it is...'
'Grruagh! I should have known the fucking cunts would lace the tea!' Rainbow mentally screamed.
This wouldn't be the first time the caribou spiked her drink with an aphrodisiac, considered a more 'efficient' way than just straight up injecting her bloodstream with the drug. It was the only way they got her wet enough to provide lubricant for their invading cocks. Though most didn't care and used her dry. Damn those cuntwhipped cocksuckers! Her loins were burning, thoughts intruding her brain to leave and seek a male to hose down the fire with hot, disgusting spunk. She bit her lip hard, using all her strength to keep her twitching hand from going anywhere near the scorching itch between her legs.
The voices were the worse part. The corrupted taint in the air had a nasty effect in compelling her to listen to all commands of the caribou. To give in and submit to male supremacy. How it would feel good to be a dick obsessed slut to drown her brain in thick semen. Visions of various scenarios where the caribous gangbang her, using whatever orifice was available to rub and pump their shafts into. The lewd imagery, the feeling of every inch, girth, and flesh of their manhoods, forcing their way into her throat, cunt, or anus. The pain of being absent from long, pulsating flesh reshaping her womb for its purpose. And even worse, the drug made her body think she liked it. That she enjoyed becoming a cock gurgling whore to these burly monsters.
Her fingers kept fiddling around in the bedsheets, trying to maintain her grip and power through this torture. Think up any solution than reach down and stroke her throbbing clit. Hot fem cum leaked out of her moistening pussy lips, her breathing hot and heavy.
She took a glance at the shower door. Sombra was taking his turn in the shower, humming to himself. No... Fuck! she thought. Sombra would notice the smell of wet mare. Rainbow could already see him teasing her like the smug asshole he was, maybe even make her beg for his cock. Her kneeling before the former king, lavishing his scepter with her mouth and tongue until she proved her worth in taking that big, meaty cock into her--
'Fucking damnit!!' she cursed, chewing her lip raw. 'Why did I get such a big douse of this shit!?'
Rainbow took slow deep breaths, trying her best to distract herself from the aching need to go stick her ass up for any takers. 'Gotta think back to when life was good; back when I could race through the skies, hang with friends, hanging with friends, babysitting Scootaloo, joining the Wonderbolts! Anything but-'
The sound of the running water disappearing caught Rainbow's ears. Sombra must have finished, stepping out to dry off and groom himself. The mare's fingers gripped onto the sheets tighter, her chest heaving on every breath. She clung her legs together tightly, rubbing friction against her wet cunt. She didn't know what was more unbearable; the raging heat of her sex or the sounds coming from the other rooms. The sound of other male residents enjoying their 'room service' while the horrified cries of mares echoed throughout the walls.
The bathroom door opened, and out came Sombra, clad only in a towel covering his lower region. Her eyes took in the sight of his masculine physique: that well-toned torso, a patch of fur fluffing up his chest. The many scars coating his arms and back. His freshly shaven muzzle, save for the bit of fuzz on his chin. The way water dripped down his long mane and brows. Needless to say, Sombra was a fine specimen of a stallion. Just the mere sight of him made the pegasus whimper needily. The anticipation of letting this magnificent beast have his way with her grew insufferable.
The exaggerated panting and small noises caught the dark unicorn's attention, the sight of her trembling form under the pale moonlight shining raising concern. Before he asked what was with her, something else caught his nostrils--something... musky. His eyes lit up in comprehension before that familiar grin spread his features.
"Oh my," he chuckled, his voice lowering to a husky baritone. "Seems somepony has gotten rather antsy waiting for me to come out of the shower. Tell me, does the sight of me make you squirm... or shiver~?"
"Fuck you!" she hissed, face flourished in embarrassment and rage.
"Keep asking nicely like that, and I'll consider it~."
"Shut your piehole, pervert! You'd be a whimpering horn dog too if you drank aphrodisiac tea," she snarled, her eyes fighting to tear down to the bulge in his towel.
"Ahh, yes... The air is tainted to make even the saintly of fellows converge to sinful delight," Sombra acknowledged, staring at his erection with dismay. "Nugh! Every time those service mares come in, I get the pulsing need to ravage them into a wall, slamming them into other furniture until I broke them into accepting my stallionhood."
This promoted a squeak out of the mare, helpless to imagine taking part in that vivid scene.
"Remind me what the source of this foul atmosphere is again?"
"Part of a spell King Dainn cast once he secured the Crystal Empire," she explained as best she could while keeping her hand from sliding into her honey pot. "They replaced the Crystal Heart with a diamond dildo, apply dubbed the 'Crystal Cock', that emanates the lewd vapor all over Equestria. It's how most of the other mares and stallions fell. The more you try to resist it, the stronger it gets. When you give in to those aching desires, it weakens your resolve and makes it easier to agree with the caribou's logic. Y-You can those voices, right? Compelling you to pin me down and fuck me to the ground..? Mmnngh~!"
Sombra nodded, red burning his cheeks while his eyes wandered all over the mare's nude body. Even without this terrible influence, he had been secretly admiring how athletic her figure was for quite the petite mare, hints of suppleness to her small but curvy breasts and hips.
"So it's a doomed situation," Sombra concluded begrudgingly. "We either resist long enough for our minds melt or get it over with and fuck each other, at risk of losing our senses."
"Sucks to suck, huh? Hehe... You give in once; you'll be taking slaves just like the good old days, aye, Sombra? Except you'll be fucking them mindlessly. Hard probably, giving you've got a cock the size of a.. Mmnnf~ FUCK!!" Rainbow moaned furiously, ending her futile resistance and burying her hand deep into her soaking marehood, stuffing her juicy slit full of her fingers, trying to dig deep and touch all those spots burning inside her. Soft moans and curses escaped her mouth.
The former king glared at her, his fists tightening. "How degrading! There must be some other way to get a hold of ourselves!" Sombra's eyes leer lecherously down to watch her unwillingly masturbate in front of him. The sight of her legs spreading, almost invitingly, made him lick at his lips.
"Mmm... A-Agh! Well, either call up a slut to suck you off or give me that dick to blast my cunt with. Otherwise--Mnnagh! You're gonna have a restless night with that sticking up, m-mmmng~!" Her eyes glared hard at his bulge, hating how much she wanted it.
Sombra sneered back with an offended look. The nerve of her to demand such a course of actions from him. He had brought the most resilient mares, and stallions fall before him. But this mare, panting like a bitch in heat, had the gall to ask him to fuck her. And the taint of the air compelled him to do so, to show this slut her place. The anger and lust fueling his brain went straight to his crotch, making the towel feel tighter around his waist.
With a troubled groan, the stallion conceded. "Very well... h-here."
Before Rainbow could react, Sombra walked towards her and shoved her further onto the bed, crawling in between her open legs, her dripping flower spread in full display.
"Gah! H-Hey! D-Don't just fucking stare at it, you fuck! Either do something or--MMNNAGH~!!?"
He ignored her, fingers tracing along her inner thighs while feeling the damp stickiness of her fur. The moment they reach to prod and poke at her gushing pink insides, the mare trembled and squirmed in place, panting madly from finally having physical contact made outside her own dripping fingers. Judging how widely her hole spread, it had been abused by a lot of forced entries. Her clitoris winked at him, throbbing for him to do more than just rub and squeeze over her sensitive bud.
After his thorough examination, Sombra lowered his face to her heated crotch, his fingers tracing around the outsides of her legs. The sudden contact of something long and hot lapping away at her folds sent jolts of pleasure up her spine, causing Rainbow to spasm uncontrollably under his tongue. She could hardly keep her voice from moaning hoarsely as the tip wiggle over her clit before dabbing into her pussy hole.
"G-Gah... F-FUCK! T-That's it, right there! Right! Fucking! Theeeroooh~!" she whined.
Her praises filled his ears and ego as he continued to lick and nibble at her pussy lips, spreading them apart to get a better view of her pink insides. His tongue continued to tease the poor mare on the brink of insanity. Her hips bucked in attempts to bury his face further into her needy slit.
"Agghh! C'mon! Just stick it into me already, d-damnit!"
"Stick what in?" he mused.
Her eyes snapped open, glaring daggers over the smug smile present on his lips. "Don't you dare play this fucking game with me!"
"You're not in a position to demand anything from me, girl. I don't have to do this for you. I can easily call upon of those hookers to--"
"Graagh! Fine! Just... Tongue my dripping cunt! Hurry, I need it!" She called out, ashamed at how desperate she became to beg her former enemy to eat her out. "Stupid tea! Stupid Sombra... Fuck life! Fuck everything SO much!!! Fuck meeeee, damnit!"
Sombra snickered victoriously as he finally lashed his tongue deeper into her wet, quivering hole. He wriggled it around, tasting her juices, finding the taste to be rather delicious. It had been a long time since Sombra even laid with a mare, let alone serviced one. So while his bedroom skills may be rusty, it brought him no more joy than to see his former foe squirm with lewd and gracious expressions at his tongue game.
It was then that he remembered something from earlier that made him pull away, cautiously staring at her slit. "H-Hold on... Aren't you transmitted with some sexual disease?!"
"W-What!? No, you fucking moron!" She groaned flustered. "The guy just said that to scare the dumb shit from fucking me. It was a tactic to restrain young bucks from raping important pieces of merchandise. If you get bought, no one's allowed to thrive off your property. I wouldn't be begging you to eat me out if I had a disease, jackass!"
"How funny," Sombra snickered. "The caribou proved to be more idiotic and greedy, even among themselves. One might say it's an achievement in natural stupidity. How fascinat-mmngh!?"
His pondering was interrupted when he felt Rainbow's hand shove his face into her crotch, grinding her heated pussy against her muzzle. "Stop talking and start licking my clit off so I can wear off this stupid drug!!" Rainbow barked.
He pulled away, panting hotly with a hotter glare. "Mind your tone when addressing me, girl. I just started to like you, and I wouldn't want to leave you to hangniiigh!!"
Even without wings, she proved to be still strong and quick as a pegasus. So fast, she quickly grabbed at his throat to shove him down and pin the dark unicorn. All while glaring daggers at him while her hips feverishly humped and grind into his bulge.
"The only thing hanging will be your head, with your dismembered dick shoved down your throat if you don't shut the fuck up and fuck me right now, you cocky motherfucker!!"
It was Sombra's turn to be astonished. Never had he met a more aggressive mare in his life! How clueless was the caribou to think they could bring this defiant pegasus to her knees? She was feist, brash, and determined. Sombra couldn't have been more impressed... or aroused. Her hips worked magic into making the cock lying dormant in his towel stiff as stone. Rainbow's actions and words invoked a challenge. And challenge her, he would! With a large grin, Sombra shoved the mare back onto the bed, his own hand wrapping around her throat, applying a bit of small pressuring to force a gasp for air. The other pulled the towel away from his hips, showing the mare how hard and erected she made him, much to her subtle delight.
"Care to back up your bark with some bite, bitch?" he growled huskily, his fat black stallionhood resting over her mound. The sheer size and weight making her shudder while the confident mare snickered with a playful smile. One she hadn't worn for quite some time.
"You're on, dickweed~!"
The two of them were at it for what seemed like hours. Both of them fought for control of the other, whether it be shoving their tongue down their throats or pinning the other to take their thrusts. Currently, Rainbow was winning in this little struggle as she rode Sombra, bouncing her well-toned ass on his lap. In their kiss, she nibbled his bottom lip, tugging it while her hands clawed at his shoulders. Sombra muffled his grunts against her lips, hands squeezing and gripping her firm cheeks while trying to sync up his thrusts with her bounces. His nails dug into her flesh, drawing thin red lines to match the ones she made over his back. Whatever allegiance or animosity they had for each other couldn't compare to how good it felt to fuck each other up.
It was Sombra's turn to take back control. The dark stallion shoved her off, pinning her front onto the damp bedsheets while securing her arm behind her back. She muffled, struggling to break free from his grip, though she kept her ass up high. Going as far as to wiggled it, taunting him to come and get it. This earned her a swift smack to her behind, red stinging her rump while his girthy cock rubbed up and between her pressing ass cheeks. Rainbow bit into the blanket, trying to muffle down her moans while the dark unicorn continued to spank her, his one hand spreading her flank away to brush the tip of his dick against her puffy pussy before diving back in; pounding her body into the creaking bed.
From all the mind-numbing pleasure her drugged brain was absorbing, Rainbow managed to note the difference between the caribou and Sombra. The caribou were wild, just quick to pin down a helpless mare and stuff her hole with their dick, repeating jabbing it in and out until they hit climax. With Sombra? He would take his time and fill her pussy full, molding it into the shape of his stallionhood, ruining her for anyone else after him.
Their pillow talk was much more engaging than any filth that came from caribou's mouths. The burly bullies just demeaned and enforced their laws, making her feel how weak and disgusting the sex with them was. But when Sombra taunted her, it was to invoke her stubborn nature, to get her to fight back and prove she was more than just a tight slit to slam into. That she was a mare; a strong mare.
'Shit... big-dicked bastard may be right after all,' she thought amongst the hot passion.
Speaking of that big dick, she felt it pulsate against all the right spots in her greedy pussy, making her wail sharply once she felt it's flat tip hit the cervix of her pussy. Each push threatened to break into her womb, her pussy coiling around his girth as she moaned louder. Sombra pressed his weight against her, his muzzle leaning near her ear.
"Sorry, is this too much for you," he huffed with a mocking concern. "Do I need to hold back a little~?"
"Augh! P-Pft!" she resorted, backing up her hips to meet his thrusts and push his schlong farther up in her cunt. "I've been fucked h-harder by -- uuff -- filthy war beasts with cocks the size of logs compared to your limp dick. This ain't -- ahh~ nothing!"
"Oh ho, really?" he crowed, panting hot and heavy against her ear as he raised his hand over her sore flank. "So then this.." Smack! "Is.." Smack! "Nothing?!" Smack! Smack!
"Graugh!" She yelled out, feeling the stinging pain increase in those red cheeks. If this kept up, Sombra might as well have turned her into a masochist.
"Is-- Grah! That--Ugh! All you-- Ugh~ Got!? W-What's the matter, Stud~? One stuck up bitch too much for you to p-punish?? Too much for your k-king sized cock!? C-C'mon, Stop pussy footing here and fuck me like a real stallion~!!"
Oh, That did it. That drove the former king to show this sassy little cunt who properly owned her. Growling, he leaned back to hook one of her legs up over his shoulder, forcing them on their sides while giving him a better angle to slam his cock harder into her. With a hand groping her small breast while he nibbled and tugged on her ear, Rainbow was stuck panting and moaning lewdly; nothing more for her to do but taunt him and take her pounding. Her cunt was squeezing down tightly on his member, trying to milk the bastard for all he was worth. And judging by the many pulsations his member twitched, he wasn't that far from climaxing.
"HHeh!! Gahh fuck~!!" she cooed. "Tiring you out, huh, old-timer? I knew you... mmmmgh~ wouldn't last long!" she taunted, trying to keep her eyes from crossing into her head.
"If I'm coming soon, I'm taking you -- augh!.. with me!" he hissed before he picked up the pace, roughly drilling his hips into hers to finally push his cock past her cervix and bottom out into her womb. Rainbow's mind went blank from how hard the pain and pleasure hit her senses with each push in and out; her moans nothing more now but silent screams. The feeling was too overwhelming. Her pussy was spasming all over his throbbing dick, mare cum splashing everywhere below them. Sombra released a loud groan before he hit climax just after her, hot thick ropes of semen painting the walls of her womb before filling her up.
Panting heavily, trying to catch his breath, Sombra pulled out of her before laying on his side, exhausted. His body felt strained, his cock core and flaccid as it retreated into its sheath. In the afterglow, he began to regain himself and lay flat on his back. With the desires stated, the corrupting voices were no longer singing in his ear. Hopefully, it would be a long while until he needed to relieve himself of this burden again.
Rainbow Dash took longer until she could roll over onto her back, chest rising and falling, making her breasts jiggle slightly. She stared down at her, leaking crotch. No longer did she feel the burning fire of the Aphrodisiac, but the warmth of the former king's essence. She felt many things. Sweaty, disgusted, tired, sore, and warm. Never had her sex life, before and after the Fall of Equestria, become so intense. She scooted herself closer to Sombra, allowing an arm to drape around her shoulder and pull her into his warm fuzzy chest. Resting her head, she listens to the sound of his heart, each beat slowing down with each breath.
"Fuck..." She sighed. "Did I really get my pussy plowed by one of Equestria's greatest villains?"
"Mhmm," he confirmed, exhausted. "And you liked it~."
"Pft! So what? You enjoyed tapping my ass just as much."
"Who wouldn't? It's a fine arse."
The pegasus chuckled wearily, curling her form more into his broad chest. "Well, don't think this means anything. The last thing I want my friends to know is that I let a thousand-year-old dictator hammered me into the floor. Ehhh, wait, I just realized... Isn't this technical necrophilia?"
He snorted. "Do I look dead to you?"
"Fair enough... You certainly feel alive and breathing. In fact, If I listen closely, I may even hear a heart beating under all that robust dark fur and needless ego~."
"All things have a heart, girl," Sombra yawned. "Whatever sentiment you're trying to milk from me is not there. I can assure you."
"Mhmm, sure... But, if there was any sentiment or empathy in you... would you show it to me?"
"..."
Her question held his eyes open, gazing at the ceiling in thought. What if there was? And all this time, he buried it down to defend himself from growing hurt. To justify his actions and crimes against the ponies he discriminated against. And during these hard times, would he allow himself to open up to this mare? A mare not moments ago despised and thought illy towards him before they shared an evening of intense passion.
Things have changed. He had changed. He was no longer the tyrant king of the Crystal Empire, enslaving everything under his control to build a better empire for Equestria. No longer the king returning from a frozen grave to exact his plans. No longer... King. He was just Sombra now. Until he overcame Dainn and reclaimed the throne, he could no longer call himself a king. Maybe... It was better this way?
"... It's a possibility."
But his reply was met with the soft snoring of his lover, comfortably asleep for the first time in months. She clung to him tightly, like he was some stuffed toy to protect her from this wicked nightmare. Had he grown softer during his time spent with her? Or... did he grow stronger from it? The more his thoughts pondered, the more questions formed. And as the more questions formed, the deeper he fell into sleep. Tomorrow, the two would find her group of rebels to fulfill their plan to defeat the vile caribou.
And put an end to this madness once and for all.
Ri-Riiiiiing
Cαɳ ყσυ ԋҽαɾ ιƚ?
Ri-Riiiiiing
Cαɳ ყσυ ϝҽҽʅ ιƚ... ƈσɱιɳɠ ƈʅσʂҽɾ?
Ri-Riiiiiing
Yσυ ɱυʂƚ ƙҽҽρ ɠσιɳɠ. I ɯιʅʅ Ⴆҽ ƚԋҽɾҽ ʂσσɳ
Ri-Riiinnng
Kҽҽρ ɠσιɳɠ... SσɱႦɾα
At the sound of his name, Sombra snapped awake, panting heavily as he had before. Looking over his surroundings, he let out a low sigh, thankful he was still in the room and not in the cold forest.
'Another dream' he thought to himself. 'That voice... The bell... I want to know what they mean!'.
It took him a moment to realize his companion was not by his side. His head quickly drew up to the sound of the running water is turned off. It looks like Rainbow Dash got up much earlier than he did. Which was fine; she said she wanted to use the shower first. Sombra then noticed how.. sticky and wet the sheets were. It almost made him feel pity for the maids that were going to clean up their mess. Though given the labor their masters forced on them was already dirty, it wasn't that much of a hassle. The dark unicorn's eyes then laid onto the newspaper on the table, giving him one last glance of the front line about the upcoming parade.
December 24th. Nearly a few days away from now. Hopefully, he'll have time to train and prepare.. whether he'll be accepted within the resistance or not. Though he'd never admit it, a part of him was hopeful somepony would look over his actions in the past to help secure Equestria's future. And if he learned anything from his steaming hot night with the former pegasus, they were not to be underestimated. A fatal mistake the caribou would soon regret. Still, the idea of leading the army of rebels against the barbarian's regime was one he would reach for.
Just as his mind kept wondering over battle plans for things to come, the door open and out came his potential lieutenant. Dash whipped her wet mane back as she wrapped the towel around her before casting Sombra a sly grin. "Well, look who finally woke up. You were sleeping like a rock; I thought I might have knocked you out cold last night~!"
Sombra grumbled a yawn, not fully awake to deal with the mare's crude antics. "You'd be best not to boast so loudly, Dash," he insisted. "We don't want the caribou here to know I've given you more freedom then they deemed necessary. Which is to say none."
She rolled her eyes before tossing him a towel to use. "Yeah, yeah, I know. I just wanna enjoy the last few minutes of not being chained to a collar. The shower should still be warm for you."
"Sounds like somepony's a little worried about my safety. And here I thought you didn't have any sentiment in that big black heart of yours~," Dash teased with her tongue poking out at him.
Sombra chuckled. "I don't. I'd just hate to lose a valuable asset, is all. Now hush and prepare to leave. The sooner we leave, the sooner we can get to find the resistance." And with that, he heads into the showers to get freshened up.
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, brushing over her mane a couple of times before fetching her cloak. "Whatever you say, ya big softie."
"I heard that!"
"And here's the key," Sombra said, handing back the room key to the mare at the counter, the very same one who gave him trouble last night. And she looked just as pitiful as before. Her glasses were bent, her right eye swollen black. Bruises and bite marks were imprinted all over her soft flesh, with longer marks indicating a whip was involved in brutalizing the mare.
"Thank you, Mr. Ambros," she said weakly, almost too soft to hear. "W-We hope you enjoyed your stay.
"Yes, it was quiet.. refreshing. We better get going. Come along, slut!"
Rainbow just grumbled before following him.
"O-Oh! A moment please, sir. M-My masters wish to speak with you."
Sombra paused to stare back at the mare with an annoyed look. Before he could give her some more parting words of wisdom, she stepped back to allow two large caribou to make their way. Each dressed in business suits, one plump-purple, and the other greenish-yellow. Instinctively, his arm held out before Rainbow Dash, trying to keep them away from her.
"Good morning to you, sir," the light brown beast greeted with a smile."And thank you for spending a night in our luxurious hotel! We understand you're on your way out, but if we could borrow a bit of your time, we'd like to... settle some affairs that happened last night."
'Never fails to amaze me how bloated these brutes are in trying to speak intelligently. And Dash says I have an exaggerated ego.'
Sombra sighed, looking up to both caribou. "Alright, what about it?"
"Well, you see," his partner began. "We applaud you in demonstrating your authority over these weak-minded whores! But with that being said, you were insistent to you bring your slut in the same room with you. As we said, we commend you for making an example out of our staff, but we do have rules to oblige to make sure our other customers leave satisfied."
"Yes, the biggest being that any customer can request a mare of his choosing," the purple suited bull added. "We've recently found our supply of mares on the low side, given how frequently we need to toss them out for failure or trying to escape. So until then, we've established that rule that encourages other stallions and caribou to share."
"How stupid."
"I beg your pardon?"
"Look... Gentlemen. I'm sure you do a fine job running this... lovely tavern. But you have to understand; it's a personal preference of mine," Sombra steadily explained while inching Rainbow and himself closer towards the exist. "I get jealous easily; I can hardly stand to have stallions trying to mooch off with my property. And as much as I would like to share and help out to your cause, my whore is off-limits. Now, if that's all you wanted to discuss, I'll just be on my way. Thank you and--"
"Now hold on a minute, young stallion," the yellow suited caribou interrupted, grabbing at Sombra's shoulder.
'Oh, c'mon'.
"We understand the sentiment. I'd keep my cum-guzzling whore to myself if I could! But rules are rules. And we expect them to be followed. We don't want mares and sows to get the wrong idea that they could choose to fight back after all."
"Preposterous!"
"Heresy! Life is much better for them under our hooves! So what makes you so high in might to ignore our rules, if I may ask?"
"Well, you see-"
"Wait a minute.."
The purple suited caribou pushed Sombra to hold Rainbow up by her arms, causing her to squirm and struggle before he unveiled her hood to reveal her face and multicolored mane.
"That's... That's one of the elemental bearers!" he gasped.
"By the might of King Dainn, you're right! The reports said she went missing after the traffickers got attacked... What is she doing here with you?!" Both large brutes glared at the unicorn suspiciously, Sombra returning their hard looks.
'Shit!'
Quickly, Rainbow swung her leg to kick the caribou hard in the stomach, the large mammal bellowing in pain as he dropped her. Sombra would follow up to elbow the other caribou, shoving him over his partner. Just as the two ponies were about to make a beeline to the door, their path was blocked by the other male taverners. Stallions and caribou circled them back into a corner. Rainbow and Sombra kept their back to each other, taking a stance while eying down the distraught expressions. The tavern owners rose, dusting each other off while sneering down the former pegasus.
"Stupid bitch! I'll have your ass lashed before handing you over to King Dainn!" he yelled, clutching his stomach.
"Now, now, brother. There's a more simple solution to this." The yellow suited caribou turned back to address the males of the tavern. "Gentlemen. Seize this bastard! Once the fool is disposed of, all are welcome to a free room tonight; with special service from the bearer! For male supremacy!"
"YEAH! MALE SUPREMECY" cheered the crowd, all ready to tear open Sombra and skewer Rainbow Dash until something broke through a glass window. It landed between the growing mob, the caribou, and the pair of refugees. One stallion bent down to pick it up. "It's just a rock... Wait, why is it ticking?".
BOOOOM!
An explosion burst out of the rock, blasting the mob apart. Rainbow yelped, bracing herself for incineration, but did not feel her flesh being torn off. Opening her eye, she saw a dark crystal barrier protecting them. Sombra managed to get a shield up before the grenade went off. Sounds of groans and grunts came from the other side as silhouettes of what looked to be others fighting each other on the other side of the crystal barrier. What on earth was going on?
Soon, the sound of bodies dropping was met with silence... and then hoof steps coming towards them; a large silhouette looming over the barrier. The figure placed their hands on their hips before shouting out,
"Listen up in der. Y'all got to da count of three ta drop this here barrier before Aah breaks it down!"
"Wait, I know that voice!" Rainbow gasped, looking up to the dark stallion to follow that command. Slowly, his crystals cracked before the shield fell apart, revealing an angry-looking orange mare with a western hat on top of her head. Her green eyes burned deep into his red ones. Around her neck was a black collar, exactly the one Rainbow had. She wore a dark green jumpsuit and boots. His eyes then noticed two other mares behind her. One being grey with a straight purple mane void of any expression on her face. The other a pink mare, with a mane out of control who waved a friendly 'hello' at him. And behind them, all were the unconscious (or dead) bodies of all the males and the caribou. The counter mare stared with wide eyes before she slowly shuffled her way towards the exit before bursting out, bawling loudly. "F-Free! I-I'm FREE!"
"Applejack! Pinkie! Maud!" Rainbow Dash cried, running up to give the pink mare and her sister a tight hug. "What took you guys so long?!"
"Ah! Sorry there, sugarcube," The earth mare, Applejack, said sheepishly. "We would 'av gotten here sooner if Pinkie here didn't git us lost." The pink mare offered a big smile while shrugging her shoulders.
"But enough about me. I wanna know da whole deal 'bout him," Applejack stated, glaring down at Sombra, who remained on the floor, eying the mare skeptically as she loomed over him. "So Sombra lives after all... And here Aah was hopin' them be just rumors. But don't worry, Dashie. I'll take care of him quick."
"W-Wait, don't!" Rainbow Dash insisted, getting in between her friend and the dark stallion. "Sombra helped me escape from the traffickers! I-It's a long story, I'll explain on the way back. But he wants to join in our fight against the caribou."
"Oh really now," AJ scoffed, pushing Dash aside to grab at the dark unicorn's throat, Sombra gasping and choking while trying to loosen her grip. His horn flared up to cast a spell, but this only made the earth mare's hold tightened. Sombra had forgotten how inherently strong earth ponies could be. Any more force, and she'd snap his neck in half!
"And just why does the former tyrant of da Crystal Empire want to help the resistance?"
"A-Augchh! T-To save... Equestria... from the caribou's grasp!" Sombra wheezed out.
"Hmph.. we'll see 'bout dat. Gals! Round up every mare in this place. We're takin' em' back to camp!"
"But what about Sombra?" Rainbow asked while the Pie sisters urged her to come along.
"We're takin' him too. Aah'm sure Lady Ewe will have plenty of questions for his royal highness here."
As Sombra watch the rebels take to the other rooms to free every mare in the tavern, the last thing he saw coming was an orange fist knock the daylights out of him. Everything went black. |
Fall of Equestria: Throes of Winter | ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕀𝕍: 𝐸𝓃𝑒𝓂𝓎 𝑜𝒻 𝑀𝒾𝓃𝒹 | Ri-Riiiiiing
SσɱႦɾα
Ri-Riiiiiing
Wαƙҽ υρ, SσɱႦɾα. Iƚ ιʂ ɳσƚ ყσυɾ ƚιɱҽ ყҽƚ!
Ri-Riiiiiing
Hσɯ αɾҽ ყσυ ɠσιɳɠ ƚσ ʂαʋҽ ԋҽɾ, SσɱႦɾα?
Ri-Riii--
"Wake up, ya idgit!"
Sombra's eyes snapped open, gasping for air as more water poured down his face. The dark stallion coughed out spit, and liquid accidentally inhaled.
"'Bout time ya woke up. Ya must have been out for about four hours now! Guess Aah knocked ya out real good," the southern voice chuckled.
As he catches his breath, Sombra's eyes strained to adjust to the misshapen figure in his blurry vision. The first thing in view was the smug, satisfied grin of the orange earth mare responsible for his aching head back in the tavern. A couple of jerks told him his limbs were restrained behind his back, his tired body against the wall of a tent. He grunted, testing how tight the rope around him was by trying to break out with little strength. A minor setback, seeing as woven rope held no strength against any spell in his arsenal as he began to conjure such a cast...
... Only for it to send a surge of electricity through his neck the moment he thought about magic, a roar in pain out of him. A small, giggling sound caught his attention as he glared at the pink mare sitting on a stool by the orange one, winking at him while waving a little black remote control with two buttons to press into.
He glared begrudgingly at the two mares. The nerve of them to place a shock collar around him, even if it was to prevent him any access to magic.
Silence filled the tent as the Sombra and Applejack glared judgementally at each other before the unicorn spoke up with the first question. "Am I to assume you've taken me, hostage, at the rebel base?"
"You'd be correct," AJ confirmed. "Lucky for ya, we found y'all before any caribou reinforcements came stompin' by dat tavern. Dat one mare runnin' like a maniac alerted a nearby squad. Once they apprehended her, they went to de Inn to investigate da ruckus."
So they had made it to the resistance least. That much was a relief. So then...
"Where is Dash?"
"Aah'm not obligated to tell ya that," the earth mare snorted, walking towards him before taking a seat on her stool. "Right now, yer being interrogated, yer majesty. Aah'll be da one askin' questions around here. Got it?"
Sombra growled lowly in response. As much as he was amused with this little contest of staring daggers with the orange earth mare, this wouldn't get anywhere. Not when the caribou's parade was in a matter of days. So he gave a slow nod.
"Good," AJ huffed, snapping her fingers as the pink mare bounced up to the side of the tent before bringing out a big lamp to shine over his face. He hissed, squinting his eyes from how harsh the light was shining closely to his face.
"Now, first and foremost, how are ya alive?"
"If you ask pointless questions like that, we'll be here all day--oomph!" he grunted, a powerful boot kicking the air out of his diaphragm.
"No, if you refuse to cooperate, we'll be here all day. Now answer me, varmint!" she repeated, digging her heel into his sore rib.
"Gruaagh!! I-I don't know!" he growled. "All I remember is waking up under a frozen tree in the middle of nowhere; cold and alone."
"Would 'ave done everypony a favor if ya just froze ta death," she muttered. "Now, how did ya git so acquainted with Rainbow Dash? Plannin' to mind rape her into doin' yer biddin'?! As if she hadn't been through enough already!!"
"On the contrary, I saved her from being sold to a fat slob in a traffic accident."
"Better some 'fat slob' than another tyrant tryin' to twist Equestria into a desolate wasteland!"
"Do not confuse me with the caribou so easily! What I want for Equestria is far more inspiring than the filthy fuckpen of those mongrels!"
"Shut up!" She snapped, planting her foot firmly into the stallion's chest. "Answer da damn question less ya want yer chest caved in from collateral damage!"
The old black unicorn chuckled. "Such empty threats.."
"Wanna try me, partner?"
"Kick the shit out of me if it pleases you. It will not change the fact that I hold more of an advantage over the caribou than your camp of rebels and refugees."
That definitely struck a nerve as the orange mare kicked him harder before grabbing him by the throat and holding him by his neck, the battered unicorn choking and struggling in Applejack's grasp.
"Listen here, ya son of a bitch! The only advantage ya have is the time I haven't spent pantin' you back in the ground to push up daisies! We've been fightin' a long time to put an end to da caribou and their abuse of power! And da last thing anyone needs ta worry about is you! So gimme one good reason not ta send ya packin' back to Tartarus, Sombra!"
"Applejack, that's enough!"
Both ponies turned at Rainbow Dash's familiar raspy voice entering the tent, now in her black jumpsuit with silver buttons and zippers. The tyrant was dropped back on the ground, wheezing for breath while Applejack confronted her friend.
"Aah thought Aah told ya to stay out of this, RD," she said firmly. "You're back with us, safe and sound! There's no more need to be anywhere near this black-hearted bastard."
"Applejack... I appreciate your concerns for me, after all that we've been through together. But there's more at stake here than holding grudges against beaten foes," Rainbow insisted, walking towards the orange mare. "I know this is a bad idea, but we need all the help we can get. Sombra has every right to be with us to fight caribou domination as we do."
"Are ya fuckin' kiddin' me!? I ain't gonna let walk around freely just for him to backstab us later! Aah, see no real justification for keepin' this evil fiend alive! Look at him, just as twisted and conniving' as those monsters."
"He is not a caribou! He's a pony! Yeah, he can be a real shady bitch at times..."
Sombra softly glared at his 'friend' before shrugging.
"... But he's still a pony! I've seen it; He wants Equestria freed from the caribou's clutches just as much as we do."
Applejack scoffed. "Aah can't believe how stubborn ya are sometimes, RD. How foolish can ya git trustin' the lies and temptations of a rattlesnake! He'll use ya, Rainbow Dash! Hell, judgin' by your smell, he already has..."
This caused the blue mare to look away, blushing madly while rubbing her arm.
"Yea, don't think Aah don't recognize da smell of a mare whose been rollin' in the hay!"
"H-Hey! What choice did I have? I was drugged! They laced my tea! He was the only one I trusts to get rid of the itch! No way could I have lasted the whole night!"
"A whole night of passionate hate sex~" The black stallion chimed in cheekily.
"Will you shut it?!" Rainbow snapped at him. "You're not helping your case!"
"And why should I pretend to be something I'm not? I am a king, given a second life to reclaim this land in my name. I will not deny who I am!" He exclaimed, his glare shared with the three mares. "You and I share a common enemy; that is where the similarities end. But if you want to give your resistance the best outcome possible in taking Equestria back from those idiots, you'll do as I say and release me!"
"Got a lot of nerve thinkin' Aah'll just stand by while you run amu--" the hands of Dash caught her voice as she gave an assuring jerk.
"Applejack, Please!" She said, a little more softly. "I know he's far from trustworthy! I know he's a villain. But he might be our only powerful ally left..."
The mare was shaken, furious beyond recognition. Her green eyes burned hatred for the dark unicorn as tears began to pour from her cheeks. With a weary sigh, she lowered her hand and turned to the fallen pegasus, trying to keep the sobs in her throat from escaping.
"A-aah just..." she sniffled, rubbing the leaks from her eyes. "Aah thought Aah lost ya for good, RD! And ta hear dat ya were with our old enemy, going as far to sleep with him... That's some scary stuff ta take in, Rainbow! In a world losing life and freedom... Aah don't wanna lose any more friends!"
Rainbow would pull the quivering strong mare into her arms, embracing her. "I know... I missed you guys too. I was so scared that I wouldn't see you again," her voice cracked, trying her best not to cry before reaching to pull her friend into a tight embrace. The two stayed like that for what felt like minutes passing by slowly, lose in the warmth of each other. Then another set of arms wrapped around them. They turned to Pinkie Pie, who smiled sadly with tears flowing down her puffy cheeks as all three pulled close to each other. For once, there was safety in the arms of the former champions of Equestria.
Sombra wisely kept silent while his glare softened, seeing the three rekindled their former strength. Despite his own distaste for sentimental value, unity would be the key to their survival and retribution. Only together would they pose a greater power against their true threat.
His ears twitched at the sound of hoof steps entering the tent. The grey mare with the light purple mane in a greyish green jumpsuit made her entrance. "Lieutenant Applejack," She addressed dully. "I'd hate to interrupt this touching reunion, but Lady Ewe is asking for your presence in regards to Sombra."
The three mares would pull away from each other as Applejack regained her early authority, whipping the tears from her cheeks. "Alright... Tell her we'll be a few minutes. Almost done with our interrogation," she said, casting a narrowed gaze at Sombra, who arched an eyebrow at her.
It wasn't much an interrogation as it was her getting her hands on him to release all that building tension within her. Still...
Lady Ewe?
Was that the name of their leader?
His pondering didn't last long as he was brought up to his hooves. Rainbow began to untie the ropes binding his hands to his back. Once his arms were free, he catered the rope burn around his wrists, rubbing tenderly. Before he could mutter any word of appreciation, Applejack approached him with her less than harsh gaze and her voice far less aggressive.
"Alright, Sombra. Seein' as ya did saved Rainbow and kept her from harm's way; Aah'll level with ya. Aah won't ever trust ya, that's for sure. But it's clear as day yer not against us. So that's enough to let ya stay here. But make no mistake..." She would pull his collar once more, her eyes narrowing into his burning reds. "Da moment Aah see ya tryin' ta pull a fast one under us, Aah'll find dat ditch ya crawled out from and bury ya twelve feet deeper."
Sombra let a grin spread his bruised face.
"Very well, then... Let us be enemies of mine over the singular goal of crushing the caribou regime. You have my word that I won't act out of my own accord. But I would love to see you try and murder me in cold blood with your brute strength, earth mare. I am much more formidable now than the last time we met~."
A sly chuckle left the orange mare. "Aah'd certainly hope so. Be a mighty shame to defend our resources and lay our hopes to a unicorn king who got bested by a baby dragon."
His horn flared up in anger, a low growl escaping his throat before a quick jolt shocked the rising force of magic out of him; his glare shifting towards the snickering pink mare before the three of them turned to leave the tent with Sombra in tow. Rainbow would lightly jab at his shoulder playfully.
"Don't take it personally," Rainbow Dash grinned slyly. "You weren't getting in here any other way. Now try to be nice, won't you?"
Low grumbling was his only response as he followed the three mares out from the tent. If one could listen carefully, they might hear him mutter something about driving every dragon to extinction when he reclaimed power.
Outsider.
That was the best word to describe his position in the resistance camp.
He felt alienated from the many glances he received as he walked behind AppleJack and Rainbow through the camps. The day was cloudy, with light snow falling over the grounds. From the few mares talking or working with each other, he could estimate that over a hundred had managed to escape and reside here. And at least a couple more were giving him a variety of looks. Some mares glared death in his direction; others fear his reputation while muttering his name to each other. And some seemed to be looking at him lustfully as if he were the last stallion alive in a world barren of decency.
If not for the dystopia they were all forced to live in, Sombra was confident this would be the most uncomfortable position he's been put through. Not only would he be expecting these ponies to believe in him to bring back their fallen country, but they had to be willing to follow his lead. This would have been so much easier just to break their minds in.
"Gah!" he yelled, feeling his backside suddenly receive a very rough smack. He turned his attention to the bubbling pink mare behind him, looking innocent and pretending to whistle. He narrowed his eyes at her,
"What was that for?" he demanded. She gave a flirtatious smile and shrugged.
"She likes you," came the boorish tone of her sister walking beside her. "She's thrilled to have you as an ally rather than another enemy."
He huffed. This one was the more ecstatic of the bunch. What impressed him was that she manages not to lose the bounce in her step despite the circumstances. His staring caused her smile to widen and even to make her bounce up and down more quickly.
"For such a childish mare, you'd expect her to be bursting with enthusiasm or at least singing for all to hear," he muttered.
"She's mute," Maud responded.
That made him do a double-take. "What?!"
Pinkie Pie stopped her bouncing to open her mouth wide and stick out her tongue... or what was left of it. It looked to have been severed off. He gazed at it with a somewhat disturbed expression.
"When the caribou captured us," Maud began to explain. "They were having complaints about how much she was 'talking their dicks off' and how it 'killed the mood.' So they silenced her permanently by removing her tongue. She was sad for many months... But knowing my sister, she bounced back." A small smile appeared faintly on the grey mare's lips. "Even during the harsh times, she wouldn't allow others to remain so sad."
Pinkie would bob her head rapidly in agreement before resuming her bouncing. Sombra would rub the back of his head, sheepish about his previous comment.
"Still, that is terrible! I'm deeply sorry."
"Don't be," Maud assured, returning to her default expression. "She's glad to express herself in... other ways."
It then drew his attention that Pinkie had pulled the zipper of her black jumpsuit further down to show off cleavage, her bust jiggling with each bounce she made. And to say the mare wasn't stack compared to Rainbow or AppleJack wouldn't do justice to how bountiful her breasts were. His eyes found her big wide blue ones, caught in a sultry gaze while she wiggled her eyebrows playfully. Sombra felt heat rush to his cheeks before he turned away from her and shuffled closer to Rainbow, whispering to her,
"You'd think that in a dystopia where rape and misogyny ran rampant, it would be absurd to see all these mares looking to pounce on me with such lecherous expressions..."
"It's mostly the influence of being with the caribou for too long. Most of us can't help our loins from burning up, and masturbation doesn't always cut it. So while you're a wicked stallion with evil intentions... You're also kind of a hottie with years of experience in how to lay with a mare. So take it for what you will. Just don't get caught ogling over Pinkie too long, or you might give them the impression that you're an old pervert looking to bed all these fragile mares in need of a strong stallion to protect them~" Rainbow whispered, a knowing smirk spreading her muzzle.
"I wasn't--"
"Pipe down, will ya!" AppleJack cut in, her face flustered from the chatter. "Aah don't need to hear da details. Aah'd like to 'ave some decency in this mad ridden world!"
Sombra rolled his eyes, muttering to himself. He glanced back between the three and only now noticed the different colored collars. Around the necks of Applejack and Rainbow were black while Pinkie sported a bright red one. He would lean forward to the blue Pegasus' ear.
"The collars... They hold some meaning, yes?" he asked. He thought back to the caribou back in that cabin he crashed in, remembering vaguely about he mentioned something about the collars and their importance.
"Yeah," She whispered. "It's a caste system the caribou have. Black collars are for mares that constantly fight and need 'attitude adjustments'" she shuddered over the implications, recalling the many methods they used whenever she refused to submit. "Red's are for the mares that behave and do as they're told. Whether they're just going along to live or have given up varies. Then there are the purple collars.."
"Purple?" He glanced over to the many mares, still watching. Not a single shade of violet or purple around their necks.
"For mares who are too broken from so much abuse," She continued. "Because the caribou are reckless and gluttonous, some mares can't withstand getting fucked over again and again. To the point where they can't function or think properly without something shoved into them. If you ask me, killing them would be a merciful fate than that..."
Indeed. A mind was a fragile thing to break. It was his favorite tactic to demonstrate what would become of all his opponents. Though he never took it as far as to destroy their psyche beyond repair, let alone by 'fucking them to death.'
"Can you take them off?"
"Pft. You'd think I'd still be wearing mind if I could? They're bond magically around our necks, thanks to that magical dildo acting as a beckon in the Crystal Empire."
The Crystal Empire. It felt like ages since he last heard of that place. His former kingdom. And it seemed that a majority of power was placed there. He noted this in his mind for when the time would come to put their rebellion into action. Oh... what had become of his empire? How much has it suffered from the caribou's tainted influence on the land?
"What became of the Prince and Princess of the Crystal Empire? Are they not your allies?" he asked with a hint of loathing in his voice. They were responsible for usurper his throne. But to his surprise, Rainbow Dash returned a similar tone when she was addressing them.
"Cadance and Shining Armor... Those filthy traitors!" She seethed lowly so as not to draw attention from the rest of the mares in the camp. "To this day, I'm in denial that such wonderful, caring ponies betrayed their own country in favor of... this!" She curled her hands into a fist. It was a rather unbelievable thing to expect, but at the same time, Sombra couldn't help but find it ironic how the very beings that took over from him would turn their backs against their fellow countrymen.
"They sold us out! Gave up the Crystal Heart and everything when Dainn showed up to enslave their subjects as mere toys!"
'Huh. Doesn't that sound familiar,' He pondered sheepishly.
"And their daughter... God's above knows what they would have done if she had not escaped," She wretched, looking as if she would vomit at the possibility. Sombra, too, felt nauseated by the thought of their daughter-- no... the mere thought of children having to live in this land of barbarians and rapists filled the dark unicorn with rage. He never believed it was right to subject foals to harsh environments or any of his torturous ways. If they were strong at their age, they would grow up to be proud warriors in his name, at the very least. But no one so young should suffer such heinous actions.
"How fortunate," he agreed darkly, fueling his disdain for King Dainn and the caribou swine, as well as his apparent hatred for the current rulers of the Crystal Empire.
"Where do you think the young Princess ran off to?"
Before Rainbow could reply, AppleJack held out her hand to stop them. "Enough talk, ya'll! We're here."
Before all of them stood probably the tallest of the camp's tents, it looked as if it were made from the very forest itself. Long branches and roots formed the poles while plant life and leaves waved against the wind. One flag was raised on the tent's highest part, a banner showing what looked to be the same logo the caribou used except the Alicorn sisters' symbols breaking free of the chains. Two mares stood in front of the tent's entrance before both saluted to Applejack.
"Lady Ewe will see you, Lieutenant Dash and Sombra now," the tallest instructed.
The orange mare nodded as the two guards pull back, the tent's fold opening. The three ponies would walk inside while the Pie sisters stood with the guards as the meeting with Lady Ewe was underway.
To say that the interior of the tent was even more enchanting than the exterior was an understatement. For the first time since his return to the world of the living, he saw... life. A blue flower glowed above in luminescent light, serving as a ceiling lamp. Only a single bed made of leaves and plant light was shown in the corner as the main desk took the entire tent's center. And sitting at that desk stood a robed figure.
She hummed to herself in a language unheard of, seemingly not noticing the ponies as blue light poured from her fingertips. Sombra gazed at the staff in her hand, shaped like a dreamcatcher from carven wood. Strange runes seemed to give off pale light, beckoning every few seconds. This was magic he had not seen nor studied about. Who was this creature?
"Ahem." AppleJack coughed. "Lady Ewe?"
The humming stopped, and the glowing diminished as her head turned to gaze at the three ponies. Sombra's eyes lit up in astonishment, noting the curved horns sticking out from her hood and slanted warm eyes staring back at them.
"O-ohh!" the figure quipped. "Ye startled me thaur, Applejack! Forgife me; Ah was havin' anither dwam, askin' th' spirits fur onie guidance fur these troobled lain. Ahh, but Ah see ye brooght uir unexpected guest... Stoat!" With a giggle, she turned fully around to address the three ponies before her.
For a pony, she was not. Her muzzle was much shorter with a broad nose, matching the features of a sheep. Light blue hair curled in front of her forehead, with a braid held by a silver pendant before her chest, her cheeks painted in blue markings. Similar symbols were etched along the curves of her horns. Honey brown eyes shimmered in the light, wide and almost childlike. A green tunic was worn under her deep blue robes, draping over her round figure, almost hiding her wooly legs and goat feet.
Sombra stood there, dumbfounded. How was such a cute and majestic looking creature the leader of the Equestrian rebels?
"Fàilte," she greeted, bowing her head while clutching her staff tightly in her hands. "Ah am Oona Ewe, Faun ay Dreams an' Shepherd ay Hope. Whit a strange pleasure it is tae meit somepony like yerself, Sombra."
It took the unicorn a moment to break his trance from the ethereal beauty. He cleared his throat before responding, "Strange does not truly describe this, I admit. I would never have suspected a small goat of being a leading figure against a world of ravenous caribou."
While the two mares gave a glare at him for such an insult, Oona only scoffed at the comment.
"Ooh, really noo? That's rich comin' frae a stallion knoon only fur his cruelty an' prejudice aw his life. An' yit haur ye stan befur me, askin' tae be apart ay oor cause. Funay hoo things wark, hmm~?"
The dark stallion lowered his head down, his tone much lower while keeping its aggressive edge. "My apologize, your ladyship. it was not my intention to insult you."
"Bah! Hink naethin' o it," She giggled. "An' Lady Ewe will suffice. Thocht it is guid thon yoo're an honest fella. It's a strang trait tae carry in a leader; it helps give folks th' confidence ye want tae inspire shoods ye leid them towards prosperity."
"W-Wait, so then you know tha--"
Her smile spread wildly while nodding her head. "Aye, Sombra. Ahm awaur o who ye r an' whit yoo've accomplished. An' whit ye want tae accomplish noo. Normally, eh'd refuse th' help o someain wi' mirk ambitions an' darkness in his heart, but these r tryin' times. An' we're all haur fur a reason, arenae we?"
"The caribou's destruction," Rainbow responded bitterly.
The dream faun shook her head, losing her smile. "Nae destruction, Rainbow Dash. Equestria has faced sae much o 'at awreddy. But come th' cariboo's defeat; we'll make swift in th' land's recovery. Thes warld needs tae heal, nae commit mair acts ay violence." Oona sighed sadly. "Thocht Ah feel that's jist me as Ah sense others yearnin' fur th' cariboo's death. Haur, Sombra. Hae a seat. Ahm sure thaur ur mony questions ye wish tae ask me. Ah have plenty o mah own if ye dornt min'?"
He nodded before taking a seat into the opposing chair while Applejack stood by the side of Lady Ewe, taking her seat. Rainbow took to Sombra's side. This all felt... weird. Outside, it was cold, almost barren land where danger was ready to strike at the moment. In here, It was comforting, a warmth he hadn't felt since his resurrection--a warmth emanating from the goat in sage robes.
"This entire tent feels so serene and peaceful," Sombra began. "A sharp contrast to the real world outside. Why the pleasant atmosphere?"
"It's nae tae delude frae th' terrible conditions in Equestria, Ah assure ye. Th' cariboo, motivations aside, is a serioos threat tae oor livelihuid. Ah feel it's important tae remin' ponies whit thes ance magical lain was befur cariboo dominance asserted itself," Ewe explained. "Admittingly, mah magic in th' wakin' warld is limited. But it's help tae sprin' forth hope in those wishin' fur a brighter future."
"Waking world?"
"As Ahve said, Sombra. Ahm a dream faun, a spirit, ye main say--A guide tae those wi' terrible nightmares an' lost wills. Ah am tae floorish their dreams an' heal their minds sae they can coopon their darkest days wi' th' brightest ay smiles," She illustrated with her fingers drawing a smile over her muzzle. "Ah am also a teacher tae those in need, whether it be self-discovery ur th' ways o arcane magic."
Sombra arched an eyebrow. "Arcane magic?"
The dream faun held her hands together and summoned forth a surge of energy, the painted markings on her face and horns glowing as her eyes shimmed in white light. The three ponies shield their eyes from how bright the faun's power was.
"Magic as ancient as th' existent ay times itself. Pure an' powerful than onie magic ye ur other unicorns coods hiner tae achieve ben research an' practice. It shares mony names, but it is abune labels teachers try tae gie it. An' it is beyond spells ur incantations 'at woods require thooght ur a commain. Nae e'en th' wisest ay alicorns hae bin able tae comprehend th' unlimited potential a body can hae wi' it fully. Arcane magic is universal tae aw things an' creatures tae use."
"Whoa... so you're saying anyone could use it?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Even me?"
"Mhm!" She dimmed down her aura, her eyes returning to normal. "It comes in mony forms tae different users. But it exists in aw ay us. Pegasus, earth pony, unicorn, alicorn, fain, changelin', dragon, it disnae matter whit ye ur! Aw can access it in a body shape ur f'rm."
Ewe focused her attention on a chalice full of clear water as a small bubble emerged for further demonstration. But then it grew bigger, more spherical before glowing gold. "Tak' a swatch, an' teel me whit ye see." As instructed, each pony peered into the magical bubble. Rainbow was in awe to find herself, soaring through the skies again with fully healed wings. Applejack sniffled upon seeing her old home, her family safe and together. Neither of them knew that this was what the faun was capable of.
Sombra, perhaps, was the most enchanted. He saw himself looking down over the Crystal Empire. But it was not as gloomy and miserable as his previous reign. All of the crystal ponies cheered for him, praised him for being a wonderful king. He gasped before pulling away, uncertain of what he saw as the bubble popped. Never in his studies or his time ruling an empire did he think power existed like arcane magic! Even the oldest form of dark magic he had spent years perfecting did not compare to the almost alien energy Lady Ewe boasted.
The faun smiled, offering the cup to him. "Deoch," She encouraged. "Ye main be thirsty frae hoo limited pure water is in cariboo territory."
The dark unicorn stared into his cup, his reflection crystal clear in the waters. Slowly he brought the cup to his lips to take a sip. And... for something as simple as water, it was the most delicious thing he's tasted ever since coming back from the grave. He began to drink more of it, gulping down the glass until it was empty. Once more, his gaze fell under the dream faun's radiant smile.
"I'll tak' 'at as a yes~."
He cleared his throat, placing the cup down on the table. "Thank you," he responded.
"So tell me, Lady Ewe. If you are a caretaker of dreams, what are you doing in Equestria? Leading a resistance against warmongers, no less? You're more at home with a pacifist than a war leader." Her smile faded at his question, hands resting into her wooly lap.
"Aye, it's true. Ah hae nae business haur. Mah brither woods ken better whit tae dae abit th' cariboo than Ah dae. But alas, he isnae haur," she sighed deeply before looking among the party. "If ye aw hae th' patience fur mah tale, Ah will teel it tae ye."
The stallion and two mares looked among each other before nodding their heads. Oona took a slow breath before holding up her silver heirloom, gazing at it fondly.
"Whaur Ah come frae, th' spirit warld is much different frae Equestria," she began. "Yit we coincide wi' a body anither, enaw fur use tae physically manifest. When Ah was a yoong nighean, afair Ah acquired th' dream shepherd's duties, mah faither raised me alongside uir physical relati'es. Fur mony years, Ah grew wi' brethren, learned tae jink, an' sang uir ancestors' ancient tongues. We lived far frae Equestria, in a lain whaur nature was untooched, an' magic floorished ben everythin'. Mah faither stuid proodly as chief, teachin' aw fa sooght th' blacksmith's trade while mah brither an' Ah played amang th' kids. Those waur sic' orchid days," Oona sighed, recalling the exact faces they made before her frown returned.
"'En a body day, ships frae th' far eest sailed tae uir lain. Large horned beasts approached frae th' shores. Th' cariboo hud arrived."
"And then they took yer land and made all the does their slaves, right?" Applejack interrupted, struggling to believe all the mythic nonsense the goat shepherd was describing.
Ewe would shake her head. "Believe it ur nae, thaur was a time th' cariboo werenae jist a boorichie ay warmongerin' rapists."
"Say what now?!"
Sombra and Rainbow stared at her in disbelief, questioning her how the caribou were anything BUT rapist. The faun continued.
"A fierce race ay warriors, och aye, but they ance waur noble an' kin'. Their leader, Goudin th' Giant, was th' wisest ay sools. He explained tae mah faither 'at they cam tae uir lain in hopes ay findin' paradise, awa' frae their nations, whaur civil war raged onward fur years. They brooght us gifts of scran an' guids as a sign ay peace, bowin' afair mah faither in th' hopes they coods bide, tae which he accepted."
Sombra stared down at a loss of words to what was described. It was tough to imagine that their enemy once had dignity. But by looking into the faun eyes as memories flooded her amber orbs, it was clear she was telling the truth.
"Was it all a big lie to gain your trust?" Rainbow cut in, a look of fury in her expression. "There's no way these bastards just came in looking for peace. They had to be lying!"
Ewe shot a scathing look at the pegasus. "There's mair tae someain than jist their appearance ur actions, Rainbow Dash. An' Ah can assure ye 'at despite whit they hae become noo, th' cariboo wisnae a misogynistic race ay barbarians." Her tone held a gentle yet firm tone to keep the pegasus quiet.
"No... That all changed when Goudin's son usurper the throne."
"His son?" Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Who was his son?"
"Dainn."
It was not Ewe who had revealed it, but Sombra. Much to the surprise of the dream faun.
"Y-yes... Hoo did yoo--"
"It wasn't hard to figure out," he shrugged, eying the goat with glowing eyes. "Given the information you've told us thus far, I suspected you held some ties to the caribou. Why else would you be aiding ponykind if not because of your mistake?"
Both mares were about to smack the tyrant upside the head before Lady Ewe held her hand out, halting their actions. The other handheld her pendent defensively as she nodded her head.
"Thaur is some truth tae it, och aye. Ah kent Dainn. A scrawny hin' he was. Barely onie muscle tae heem an' quite wee compared tae th' warriors Goudin armed himself wi'. He was... an unusual fella, hud a twitch in his yak an' lookin' at everythin' wi' paranoia. His faither tauld us 'at war hud nae bin kin' tae heem an' 'at hopefully, by livin' a life ay peace, it woods heal his min.'"
Sombra stroked his chin in thought, recalling the depictions of that newspaper highlighting the winter parade. Even with built up his minions spoke of him, they couldn't deny how short his stature was, so it seemed.
"Wait... You said he usurped the throne from his father. How did he do it?"
Ewe held her pendent more tightly as she recalled her homeland, the caribou, and the one responsible for this disaster.
"Goudin learned 'at mah faither was a legendary weapon forger an' arcane master. He, alang wit other cariboo, grew interested in uir magic an' requested 'at he teach them. Mah faither agreed but warned 'at teachin' them 'at power woods nae be easy. One main discowre th' truth tae their bein' afair tappin' intae th' foo prowess ay their connection tae th' arcane. Th' cariboo waur interested in uir magic an' wanted tae learn frae themselves. Ye see, th' only way fur ye tae tap intae arcane magic is by discoverin' th' cair ay yer power. Ben it, ye discowre yer 'Onoma."
"Onoma?"
She nodded. "Onoma is th' nam ay yer arcane magic, based oan th' user's personality an' emotional state. It comes frae th' ancient deities ay auld. Mah Onoma, fur example, is called 'Morpheus.' It's whit allows me th' ability tae donner ben dreams an' pull tint sools intae safety," Oona explained shortly before returning to her tale.
"Amang th' mony students mah faither took under his win', Dainn was a body ay them. An' fur whit he lacked as a fighter, he gart up fur in terms ay brilliance. It ay th' cariboo, he was th' a body fa coods easily tap intae th' arcane. He didne discowre his Onoma, but he was certainly th' talented laddie. But his newfoond prowess in th' field ay magic was th' catalyst tae his mirk ascension. See... He grew a fondness fur me durin' mah later years spent oan th' isle." She coughed, clearly uncomfortable discussing this part of her story, much to the concern and suspicious glance given by Sombra, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack.
"He thooght Ah was th' most bonnie fain in th' strath an' gart it clear he desired me as his queen ance his faither passed ower. Dainn believed he coods captivate me wi' his talent fur magic, but whit Ah saw in his yak wasnae onie affection. Merely loost, as if Ah waur a trophy tae be won. Sae when Ah refused, an' efter mah faither scolded heem fur sic' behaviur... Weel, it shattered his fragile masculinity, tae say th' less. 'But aam th' most gifted ay mah race!' he tried tae argue. 'My magic will exceed th' loch ay mah faither! Ah am th' superiur choice in a mucker! Hoo daur ye reject me!!' an' th' mair Ah refused heem, th' angrier he grew, swearin' it slurs an' promisin' me eh'd rule th' day fur defyin' heem."
The sound of laughter interrupted her story as all eyes led to Sombra, who could barely keep in the loud amount of wheezing escaping his voice.
"W-wait! Nonono, Hold on," he gasped, trying to breathe. "You mean to tell me that this whole mess started because one insecure fuckwit couldn't handle being denied your cunt?! That is amazing! That is both the greatest and most pathetic reason to conquer a nation. Like, who would have thought?!"
"Sombra!" Applejack yelled, glaring at him hard. "For fuck's sake, show some level of respect?!"
"Oh, come now, you can't deny how absurdly amusing this is!" he sighed as his laughter finally died down while a huge grin remained plastered on his face.
Lady Ewe gave a soft glare to the dark unicorn. "As funay as 'at main seem, Ah can assure ye, Sombra. Whit happened next was nae laughin' matter. Coz loch ye ur noo, Ah didne tak' dainn's threats tay serioosly either... Until he discovered his onoma. As th' nam suggests, 'Zeus' was a powerful Onoma tae be bestowed wi', as it allowed th' user tae overpower onie magic ur power in th' f'rm ay lightnin'. It's hoo he used it tae subjugate his fella cariboo intae stagin' a coup d'etat against his faither. When Goudin died, Dainn claimed his birthrecht as kin' ay th' cariboo. Drunken aff th' power, he declared war against us, intendin' tae claeem every lest female tae serve cariboo as they deserved. Nae aw waur alongside Dainn, as mony waur enraged ower their king's death an' fooght alongside us as war broke it. Mah brither an' faither fooght valiantly tae defend th' lain, but nae level ay magic coods withstain th' raw power dainn unleashed frae his fingertips."
Oona clutched her pendant even tighter, starting to tremble a bit in her chair.
"We waur losin'. Ance Dainn hud gart his fellaw cariboo submit tae his will, we waur next," she seethed. "Aw ay th' cariboo, willin' ur nae, woods tak' each ay us; strip awa' uir clase an' defile uir bodies. Aw fauns, mah friends, mah fowk... Aw raped by a once noble an' prood race. Twisted by a paranoid coward, fa we gae power tae intact oan his self-entitlement. He woods hae claimed mah body an' maidenhuid if faither an' Ah didne retreat..."
AppleJack placed a hand over her shoulder in an attempt to comfort the poor faun as Oona did her best to remain composed while going through the horrible memory. Sombra empathized with her. He felt it. The horror, the fear. The power of over following strength Dainn commanded. All too familiar emotions he felt when he chained the Crystal Empire's ponies and forced them to kneel under his hoof.
"Ah escaped th' ance bonnie an' peaceful lain ay comraich, noo th' workin' groonds fur trainin' camps an' breedin' stables. Uir stoatin temple... Built tae brin' cheers an' worship tae th' ancients ones afair us... Noo th' thrain room fur Dainn an' his concubines. Day. Nicht. It did nae matter. Aw fauns waur forced tae partake in his desires until bloated wi' bairns, bred tae brin' warriors an' future wi'es dependin' oan gender. Dainn ushered in his age ay male dominance, an' onie tae oppose heem woods suffer endless agony."
"But why," Sombra cut in. "How could your father abandon them?! Even for your own safety, he left them to their fates!"
"Thaur wasnae much choice," the dream faun insisted, rubbing the tears away from her cheeks. "It pained him tae leave behin' aw th' friends an' famlae he gart tae th' cariboo's debauchery. Mah brither, Dion, fooght wi' heem coontlessly, hoo cowardly it was tae lae th' fight. It ended up splittin' us aw apart. Mah faither woods seclude himself somewhaur while mah brither ventured tae fin' his ain callin'. Ah was left tae fend fur myself, carry it th' wishes an' help as mony sools an' ponies Ah coods come athwart if only tae penance myself fur whit becam ay th' cariboo an' uir haem."
The shepherd gave a weary sigh before taking another drink from her own cup of water.
"Efter a while, Ah discovered 'at th' cariboo woods be comin' tae Equestria, plannin' tae conquer mair lain an' expain their rule. Nae wantin' them tae suffer th' sam fate, Ah physically appeared in Ponyville, pleadin' fur them tae prepaur fur invasion. Yit, aw waur wrapped up in their safety tae 'consider th' existence ay sic' horrid beasts.' Nae a single pony listened tae me as th' cariboo's impendin' arrival drew closer an' closer. An' nae a body coods prevent th' inevitable, nae e'en th' champions they praised." She eyed Rainbow Dash and AJ, both of them lowering their heads in guilt while the dream faun patted the earth pony's hand.
"Ah needed tae tak' action. Ah needed tae prepaur myself fur 'at fateful day. An' when Equestria feel... Ah wood be ready."
Oona stood up, causing the dark stallion to raise along, their eyes locked with each other.
"Ah, sooght tae redeem myself by callin' forth th' powers blissed by me tae protect those fa hae fa'en victeem tae Dainn's madness. Help them escape captivity tae hide haur," Ewe explained, her voice sounding stronger than it was a few minutes ago. "Ah, amang other beings ay Equestria, formed a resistance 'at woods wark tae defeatin' th' cariboo an' retakin' thes lain. Ah tint mah haem. Ah tint mah fowk. Ah wulnae see th' sam happen fur th' ponies an' mares haur."
Lady Ewe walked around her table as she stood closer to Sombra, honey eyes never leaving his crimson orbs. "Despite yer crimes, heinoosness, an' similarities tae dainn, ye ur a pony ay admirable ambition, Sombra. Ah see deep doon ye wish fur th' sam things we dae... e'en if it is fur personal gain. But fur now, ye are welcome tae stay here an' assist how ye main like," She decided, bowing her head to him.
The dark unicorn nodded in return. "I thank you for your hospitality, Lady Ewe. It is much appreciated. But I can't help but grow more curious about this... Arcane magic." AppleJack cast a worried glance at Rainbow, who shared her uneased about Sombra's statement. An all-knowing smirk spread his lips as he continued.
"You said any being could access this magic, correct? And even more, once they've discovered their 'Onoma' of sorts..?"
Ewe nodded with a raised brow. "Ah tak' it ye wish tae learn this magic fur yerself. Ah'd figure ye might..." Her eyes scanned his own, staring deeply into his soul, much to his unease. "Mmm, yes. Ye hav such high potential tae unlock sae much magic within ye, Sombra. Magic far darker an' mysterioos than any o th' shadows ye cast."
"Is that so," he mused, a rush of excitement and intrigue coursing through his veins. "Then you must show me! Tell me how I can unlock this magic!"
She shook her head. "It's nae 'at simple, Sombra. Arcane magic isnae loch a speel ye spend years practicin' tae perfect. It main comes naturally. Furthermair, ye act under th' impression Ah woods teach ye th' ways in discoverin' yer Onoma. Tae which I'll respond; will Ah be makin' th' same mistake twice in allowin' anither tyrant access tae archaic magic?"
His horn sparked in its dark red aura, his eyes fixed in a deep glare.
"The sooner you throw away these similarities between Dainn and me, the easier that decision will be. I won't deny how monstrous I am, but I will not stand to have Equestria under the rule of some paranoid Incel!"
He placed a hand on her shoulder, nearly causing Applejack to come in between the two, though the resistance leader stopped her from taking any action with the raise of her palm.
"You're not a fool. You know very well that this will give our side a much better chance of winning. I will ask you again, Lady Ewe. Tell me your secrets and how me the power of Arcane magic! Please... If not for my sake, for theirs..." he muttered the last word while bowing his head. If he were in his previous mindset, begging would be the last thing he'd do. But times were desperate, and he needed a way to best Dainn in combat when the time came.
Before Ewe could retort his bold claim, the two mares from outside the tent came in. All eyes turned to them.
"Lady Ewe!" one saluted. "Apologies for interrupting, but our recon group is returning to base."
"Oh, taing dha na spioradan!" She sighed in relief, pulling herself out of Sombra's grasp. "Ah will come tae greit them shortly. Hae they foond onie mair mares ur stragglers?"
"Yes, but that's not all, M'lady," the other mare said.
"Oh?"
"General Spike is with them as well." |
Fall of Equestria: Throes of Winter | ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕍: 𝒶 𝐿𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝒜𝓂𝑜𝓃𝑔 𝒮𝒽𝑒𝑒𝓅 | "H-Hey! It's General Spike!"
"Lord Spike? He has returned?!"
"Yeah! He and his soldiers are entering the camp!"
So went on the commotion amongst the rebels as Sombra quietly walked alongside the two mares and the enigmatic leader. At least tension was no longer on him for the time being, providing some comfortable room to think.
Normally, the former tyrant would thrive off the fearful expressions of everypony below him. But now wasn't the time to admire their terror. The Ponyville winter parade was a couple more days away, and he'd yet to hear a single plan of action from the dream faun. What would they do? Where would he be placed? And what of the arcane magic she was talking about? How was he to obtain it?
As always, his questions were put on hold as the cheering and commotion resonated strongly at the camp entrance, as a group of fellow resistance members. While most of them were different races of ponies, they were led by two large reptilian figures. One much smaller, slimmer inbuilt with hints of curves while wearing a loincloth, chest armor, arm bracelets, and a helmet. Her scales were tangerine in color, with her tail spaded in orchid. The other was a massive juggernaut, wearing proper pants, a silver pauldron that carried a heavily damaged red cap over his body, and a connecting bracelet. His bright violet scales and lime green underbelly showed scares against his magnificent physique.
In fact, this dragon looked oddly familiar to Sombra. Where was it he saw him before..?
"SPIKE!"
The dark unicorn rose his head as a dash of different colors ran by. Rainbow rushed to greet the dragon, with Pinkie Pie hopping along. Applejack remained by Lady Ewe's side.
"Rainbow Dash! Good to have you back!" the dragon exclaimed happily, removing his helmet to greet his friend with a smiling mug. Upon revealing his face, Sombra instantly recognized this dragon to be the same dragon that helped secure the Crystal Heart. Back then, he was only a baby. Now he had matured for the better as an adult, much to Sombra's internal dismay.
"You..!" he growled lowly.
"Duh! Of course, I'd be back," Rainbow boasted, rolling her eyes with her hands on her hips. "What, you think I was gonna let those fucktards break me? Not a chance~!"
The large dragon bellowed with laughter. "Haha! If that were the case, then the mare before me wouldn't be Rainbow Dash. She would have been another unfortunate victim... But I'm glad to see you're safe."
Rainbow's guise dropped as she smiled happily before giving the big lug a hug, to which Spike returned. This moment of embrace was interrupted when Pinkie fly right into his arms to cuddle and nuzzle into his chest.
"Oof! Gahaha! Happy to see you too, Pinkie," he chuckled, earning a kiss on the snout by the bubbly pink mare. Placing her back down, he looked through the crowd before spotting Applejack, offering a friendly wave. She smiled in return, tipping her hat to him while she and Ewe moved forward to greet him.
"Tilleadh sàbhailte, friend," the shepherd bowed her head while smiling kindly. "Glad tae see yee make it haur unharmed an' withit casualties. Hoo is Laird Ember fairin' durin' thes feel winter?"
"Her highness is eager to prepare her troops to set off and slay the filthy caribou," hissed the female dragon accompanying Spike. "She grows impatient with the excessive scouting missions, goat!"
"Aye, we aw ur, Lieutenant Smolder," Ewe rebutted. "Rest assured; we'll be weel prepared afair th' parade begins."
"Sounds like you've figured out a plan," Spike said, kneeling onto one knee, so he was more head level with her.
"Och aye. A body 'at Ah believe will speel th' end tae th' cariboo regime," she nodded before a look of uneasiness followed. "But afair we discuss anythin', there's someain at hain we shoods address..." and with that, she pointed out Sombra, who had been doing his best to hide both his presence and his bubbling fury over the dragon. A low gasp of murmurs came from the pony troops behind the dragons as Spike narrowed his gaze to the dark unicorn.
"... Ah, right," he grunted with flared nostrils. "I was told beforehand that an old foe had miraculously returned from death. As if we didn't have enough problems with the caribou." Sombra returned a sharp glare before approaching slowly. Spike clutched his claws, a bright yellow aura briefly glowing before a hand stopped him.
"Now hold yer horses, partner," Applejack reassured. "Aah know this looks bad... really bad!"
"I'll say! We've got caribou stomping around Equestria, taking every last mare and pony insight to render them as mindless fleshlights! And now you mean to tell me this vile piece of shit has somehow magically returned?! How is this possible!? Why isn't he imprisoned!? Or better yet, dead!?"
"Look, Spike, it's complicated," Rainbow chimed in. "We're not sure how he's come back to life. Not even him! And we understand where you're coming from; he's far from the nicest pony. but we're in dire need of as many allies as we can get!"
"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Smolder snarled. "He enslaved an entire country!"
"Y'all need to calm down--"
"HE NEARLY DID IT AGAIN THE SECOND TIME!" Spike uproared. "Now you're telling me you're going to allow him a third chance to try again?!"
"Spike, please!"
"NO! I refuse to let this stand by! Step aside, I'm cutting this bastard down where he stands!"
"SPIKE!!"
"Oh, by all means, try," Sombra chimed in, standing his ground before the furious dragon. "I have a bone to pick with you, dragon. I've been eager to remedy the humiliation you caused me all those years ago.."
"The only bones you'll be pickin' are the ones I've broken off your limbs," Spike snorted, slit eyes burning with hatred. "Bring it, you misogynistic bitch!"
"Save the speech for the caribou! I've grown sick of the comparisons as I will prove to be a far greater ruler than anyone occurring that throne!"
"Over my dead body, you--"
"KNOCK IT OFF!" Rainbow shouted, doing her best to halt the brewing fight between the dragon and stallion. Her gaze fixated on Sombra. "Why do you antagonize everyone!? Can you try not to be a dick for ONE damn day?!"
"It is because they are the ones who antagonize me!" Sombra retorted. "I see no reason to change my demeanor when everypony is hard stuck on treating me like a monster. If that's how the world wants me, then so be it!"
"But what's th' point in joinin' us if yee refuse tae commit tae changin' yer ootlook oan folks?" Oona asked curiously. "Hoo can ye expect unity if we aw cannae wark together?"
"Oh! So change wasreally up to me? Really?" He fixed his glare to the surrounding crowd, taking in the mixed emotions of concern, fear, and offense. "So if I were to say 'I've changed my ways for good, guys! I believe in the power of friendship! You can count on me!'..." he proposed with a mockingly high pitch tone. "... You would all believe me? You'd give me the chance to see how I would progress to your standards? In this day and age?"
The low murmuring and uneasy aversion of eyes proved his point as he returned to glare at the dream faun and Rainbow Dash.
"I'm not the one who needs a change in perspective. You are! Your ponies and your view of what's good and bad are why monsters like the caribou and me exist. When there is no light to offer us sanctuary, darkness is all that's left for us. And the only reason I'm even aiding you is because of the simple truth."
"An' whit truth is 'at, Sombra?" Ewe asked once more, furrowing her swirled brows.
"That I am the only one with the power and ambition to restore Equestria to its former glory. To fight the oppressors you cowards can't stand up to!"
"Bullshit!"
His deathly glare turned to Applejack, stepping in with a look of disdain.
"Cut da bullshit, Sombra! Yer not as morally grey as ya believe. Ya come here, claimin' ya got no problem acceptin' yerself as a monster, but Aah think yer too much of a coward ta try and turn yerself around. Why else would ya proclaim yer villainy if part of ya didn't want to be seen as apart of somethin' good?"
Sombra seethed at the earth pony, his inner turmoil spiraling to the surface. "You know nothing about me, nor the hardships and discrimination I've faced in pursuit of power!"
"I know a lot more than you want to admit," Rainbow Dash added in softly. "You wouldn't be trying so hard to separate yourself from the caribou's mindset if you didn't want to change. C'mon, Sombra... I know this isn't the road you want to go down--"
"SILENCE!" Sombra growled, his horn lighting up. "That's enough out of you! If it weren't for me, you would've been sold off to some fat grotesque bastard, pumping out babies for the rest of your days. Do not forget that, you arrogant little--"
"HOW DARE YOU!" Spike roared, his body overflowing with golden energy before he flung himself at Sombra, dragging him through the dirt and snow. Sombra clutched at the claw, struggling him while Spike went wild in producing his face with his bare fist.
"Spike! Stain doon thes insistent," Oona ordered, stamping her staff into the ground. "Uir fight is wi' th' cariboo, nae each other!"
"And that makes this shadowy scumbag such a reliable ally in comparison, right?!" He shouted back at her. "It disgusts me how you allowed this bastard to talk for so long!"
"He's a pony!" Rainbow Dash insisted. "Just like us! He's willing to help us! This won't erase all he's done, but he can make a start making up for it by lending us his power! We need him!"
"N-No... NO! There's gotta be a better way!" His voice strained, angry tears oozing down his scaly cheeks, trying his best not to show his sorrow to this fiend. "I refuse to let another villain get away with murder... with more rape and heinousness. I refuse to lose more people in my life!"
"Spike, I know how you feel... Really, I do! but--"
Weak chuckling came out of Sombra's crushing throat as the former tyrant made eye contact with Spike, his hands gripping onto the dragon's claw.
"Be careful with your line of thinking, dragon," he wheezed. "I can feel your rage... your unbridle wrath! So pent up with frustration, driven mad by the caribou's corruption. You don't want to hurt me just because of who I am... I'm a scapegoat to unleash your righteous fury onto, aren't I?"
"Shut up!" Spike sneered, pupils razor-thin slits as his breath heavied under thin. A sly curl of the stallion's lips only fueled his burning anger.
"It's okay to pummel me into a bloody mess because I'm evil. That's what makes it okay in your mind... But what's to stop you from going beyond that, though, dragon? For if you can accept murdering a pony, whether they deserve to die or not... What will that make you?"
"Grrrnngh! I said SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUP!!"
Just as the dragon's fist broke free and ready to cave in the stallion's skull, Sombra's horn flared up to blast magic into the dragon's face, pushing Spike off of him to gain some distance. Sombra struggles to get back onto his hooves, rubbing away the blood oozing out his muzzle while Spike shook off the dizziness of taking that blast to the face. The yellow aura around him persisted as the dragon glared him down with golden eyes, wings unfurling as he took a stance, preparing to lunge at the dark unicorn.
"Spike, please stop!" Rainbow begged.
"Stay out of this, Dash!" Spike demanded as Sombra took a stance as well, powering his own body with shadowy magic around him, lifting him off the ground. "Show me your rage, dragon," he challenged. "Show me what it feels like to be helpless! To lose everything precious to you. To feel it slip through your grasp... So that I may throw it back at you for denying me my right as king!"
"You are no king, Sombra," He spat. "Not then, not now, and not while I LIVE!" The dragon lunged once more. Sombra would form a barrier of dark crystals to intercept the charging golden bullet... Only for Spike to punch right through his defenses. Spike took in the look of disbelief and astonishment before Sombra's face met his fist, burying the former king into the ground once more. Spike towered over him, tightening his bloodied knuckles as he prepared the finishing blow.
"Sguir!" A voice called forth as the faun leaped in front of the dragon's warpath. With a wave of her dreamcatcher staff, Lady Ewe summoned out bubbles to pop in front of his bruised face, strange mystical dust clouding his face. Spike almost instantly lost all sense and fatigue over his body before succumbing to the goat's arcane magic. His golden aura depleted as his large body stumbled to the side, entering a slumbering state. The goat shepherd commanded everypony's attention with her staff's stomp in the ground, eying the two combatants with disappointment.
"Thes place is meant tae be a sanctuary an' fortress tae uir allies an' friends. Nae a battlegroond," She proclaimed bitterly while looking over the sleeping dragon. "Dornt ye see? Thes is th' reckless behaviur th' cariboo thrive in! It cost us uir beloved general. It nearly cost us Rainbow Dash!" At her name, the blue pegasus looks away in shame while Smolder kneeled by Spike, pushing him to wake up. "Ah kin yer state ay min'. But loch it ur nae, Sombra is a valuable ally in uir fauld, an' it woods be a grae errur ay judgment nae tae consider his potential amang uir ranks."
Ewe cast her glare towards the stallion himself. "Ye shoods be huir uv a thankful we've allowed ye a safe passage haur. But dinnae hink Ah willnae stain fur yer a bampot behaviur. An attitude adjustment is in order if ye want tae remain haur. Sae micht Ah suggest ye start changin' hoo ye approach folks, yeah?" Sombra stood up, rubbing his bruised cheek while solemnly nodding his head in regret.
"Understood..."
"Guid," she huffed, turning her attention to Spike. Gently, formed another bubble, this one shimmering in gold before blowing it towards the dragon. As it popped, he quickly snapped his form up awake, panting hotly. "What! I! Where is... Grrugh," he yawned, stretching his limbs before wearily meeting the unamused gaze of the goat. Shame washed over him as he let Smolder help him to his feet. "I... I lost control of myself..." he stated, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Jist a wee bit," Ewe sarcastically retorted, placing her hands over her round hips. "A general doesnae lit his anger dictate his actions in battle, lest he wants tae lose th' war early."
"I-I know, I'm sorry... I'll try better to keep a calm head."
"Ye can start by settlin' a truce between the two of ya. Or, if ye must settle ye differences, take it off campgrounds," the dream faun ordered. Sombra and Spike nodded, gazing wearily at each other as the dragon walked back to consult with his troops. "Lady Ewe," he started asking, the faun turning her head back to him with a softer expression.
"That power... That fury the dragon wielded... This was archaic magic, yes?"
Rainbow Dash and Applejack turned to one another before glancing back at Spike, who said nothing while rubbing over the soreness in his neck.
"Ye woods be correct," Oona confirmed. "'At was th' Onoma, Heracles. Triggered by th' intense urge tae barnie an' protect diz hen tae heem, Spike can manifest his anger intae enhanced loch an' speed. Th' mair anger th' dragon, th' hotter ay flames he breaths."
"Spike... When did you..?" Rainbow began to ask before Spike addressed his friends, sporting an awkward grin.
"It started shortly after I joined the resistance under Lord Ember. All I could think about was how... angry I was for failing to save Twilight or the others. So, she sent me to climb a mountain to meet with the fire spirit, Amanda. There, she taught me about channeling that anger into power and.. well, I discovered what arcane magic was. Since then, I've been training to make the most of it." Spike lowered his head, fists clutched. "But It's been hard to control properly. This whole situation and, now, Sombra returning... Everything about this just infuriates me! I-I wish I could just..." A clawed hand held him as Spike turns to his lieutenant, pulling off her helmet to look at him clearly with a comforting smile. "Relax, big guy. Nothing's perfect. You'll get the hang of it when you can! Just be glad no one else got hurt because of it..."
"But there isn't much time!" Spike insisted somberly. "The parade is our only real shot at rescuing the princesses! What if something goes wrong, I get angry and then--"
"You take it out on the ones responsible," Smolder concluded. "Just don't let them get to you. You're better than them, Spike. You're the softest, kindhearted dragon I know."
Spike would huff out a large sigh before returning his smile, nodding to his friend. "Thanks, Smolder. You know I'm lucky to have you by my side, right?"
She snorted, turning away to try and hide the blush forming over her cheeks. "Please! You're just lucky Ember made you her general and not me. I would have whooped into shape a lot faster!"
"Enough of this!"
The moment was cut short as Sombra approached the faun, his gaze fixed with impatience. "The dragon speaks true, Ewe. There is little time left before the parade arrives, and King Dainn makes his public appearance. The dragon was given knowledge about the secrets of arcane magic. I ask the same for me!"
"Affa bauld ay yee tae demain sic' a hin' frae me," She huffed coldly, her frown deepening.
"Do not play this game with me, faun! Don't think I haven't noticed the severe lack of impact my magic has! If I were a betting horse, I'd assume that the Crystal..." And he hesitated as he felt disgusted for calling it as it was. "... Cock... doesn't just influence everypony into a frenzy of over-sexualized emotions... It also nullifies the magic from all other sources."
"A valid theory, Ah dae admit. it's possible."
"And yet arcane magic flows unaffected by the caribou's corruption, hence my desperation to unlock new powers if I am to fight and defeat this brutes! Please..." he growled, really hating having to resort to begging. But there was no real-time left. And he needed power. So he sucked up his ego and bent a knee before her; his head hung low if only to hide the embarrassment on his face.
"Please.... Teach me arcane magic, Lady Ewe."
Murmurs began to rise as everyone eyed him cautiously. Among the whispers was Rainbow Dash, sporting a soft smile upon seeing him submit his bravado. Lady Ewe held her chin in thought, considering the dark unicorn's proclamation before a gentle smile spread her lips once more.
"Hae ye heard whit becam ay mah general abit?" She asked him, to which the dark stallion shook his head with furrowed eyebrows.
"No, I have not," He admitted.
"We tint heem abit a week ago. He went it scootin' fur recruits afair th' cariboo's caught heem. He pit up a valiant effort, but he was ootnumbered. An' th' cariboo's overwhelmin' loch persisted until he mit a tragic end." As Ewe explained, Sombra noticed that Applejack struggled to hold in her voice, her entire body wriggling with fury through tightly clutched fists.
"I've yit tae entroost somepony new wi' th' renk afair we heed back tae Ponyville tae secure th' parade. An' luckily fur me, ye drapped in," her smile became much coyer as Sombra put together what she was referring to.
"I'll gladly provide ye th' knowledge tae grant ye th' gift ay arcane magic... Oan th' condition 'at ye serve as general tae th' resistance camp, fur th' time bein'."
A loud commotion broke out among the rebels, voicing complaints about this ultimatum and whether this was a good idea.
"Sombra? General?! Unbelievable!"
"Is that really wise? What if he becomes more powerful!? What's going to stop him from enslaving us all!?"
"Pft, Look at him now. He's on his knees, begging. Surely he's not as strong as before, is he?"
"Y-Yeah! If the elements beat him before, we can do it again... R-Right? !"
Rainbow, Applejack, Pinkie, and Spike shared a look of conflict over this proposal. The dragon general found his voice to address the situation. "Lady Ewe... With all due respect, are you sure that's a good idea? To let someone like him have that kind of power?"
"'At decision isnae mine aloyn tae make," Ewe replied, her eyes locked with the equally conflicted expression of Sombra. "Will ye accept th' responsibility?"
Never before had Sombra felt so much pressure. Never in his years of tyranny and cruelty had he felt this much weight on his shoulders. Not even in the face of death when he fought Celestia and Luna. And yet now, here he was, on his knees, being given a rare and powerful gift with everyone focused on what he would do. This feeling was terrible. To accept would mean to change his motives around. No one would take him seriously for his past command. He was now aware of every individual presence of their lives, all of them ruined by the invading caribou's that now took their land. Their home.
'It's my home too'. He remembered himself saying.
Slowly, the ancient unicorn rose and looked over to everyone around him, from the camp residents' curious and fearful expressions to the conflicted looks of concern and angry from the former element holders and their dragon companions. To finally, the waiting gaze of the strange faun who promised the return of their home. He took a deep breath before giving his answer.
"I accept."
For once, there was silence since his arrival at the resistance. His journey was often loud, whether screaming or yelling from fighting off enemy caribou or the sarcastic quips he and Rainbow Dash would share. Sombra would admit; it was nice to listen to nothing ever since the commotion between him and the drake, Spike.
Ewe was bringing them away to a sacred path, giving the ponies there some time to absorb the bombshell that was Sombra's acceptance to becoming her general. What happened to the old one, no one would say. But judging by Dash's hesitation and the blunt refusal and death glare given by AppleJack, whatever happened to him was not good. Nonetheless, everyone was not prepared.
Sombra especially was not prepared.
Sure, he knew he would rise within the ranks as he outright commanded the authority to lead an army. But to be given the title of general? Surely, these times were so desperate, were they? His eyes remained to the ground as he followed the prints left behind the enigmatic faun. She, too, had been quiet, though just simply enjoying the weather around her than being dragged down by thoughts much like Sombra.
"It shooldnae be much further," came her voice, breaking the cold silence between them.
And indeed, it wasn't. After a small hill to overcome, the two of them found themselves running water. Threes were spread far enough to allow what little light to reflect in the river. Sombra gazed over the wintery scenery, entranced by how mystical the frost-covered plants and trees all shimmered. It wasn't often to find something so elegant looking and glorious during the bitter season of war.
"Thes is whaur we shaa awaken th' arcane magic within ye," Ewe explained, standing beside him with a soft smile. "It's th' lest remainin' place untooched by th' cariboo's corruption. It's a miracle thes much life was preserved"
"Indeed... remarkable," Sombra agreed. "A fitting place for me to train in ways I am not familiar with."
"Train?" The faun questioned while tilting her head. "Ye main nae kin 'en. Ah wulnae be trainin' ye. Ah am teachin' ye."
"Teaching me?"
"Yes," She giggled. "Thaur is somethin' yoo're nae graspin'. Arcane magic cannae be taught th' sam way a speel can. Ye cannae learn wi' th' reit words ur emotions tae harness its power. Tae first use it, ye main discowre it... within yerself."
"Myself?!"
Oona nodded. "Ben understandin' an' acceptin' th' nature ay yer bein', th' archaic energy within ye will come. An' wi' it, th' discovery ay yer Onoma. Consider, fur example, th' arcane magic Spike wields. Dae ye recaa whit Ah said abit Heracles?"
Sombra felt the urge to protest against her, demanding she gets to the point. But, then again, this was a lesson, and he couldn't afford to act so childishly. If he were going to succeed in being her general, he would have to start somewhere. He let out a sigh and thought back to his brawl with the dragon and the golden aura boosting his hulking form.
"... That it triggers if a lover or friend is threatened. And through his anger, his strength increases. So, if I were to understand the meaning of his core, he values those around him... and would give his life for them." He answered softly, a feeling of unease over discussing the values of 'friendship.'
"Och aye, huir uv a braw!" Ewe beamed enthusiastically. "An' whit abit Zeus, th' Onoma ay Kin' Dainn?"
"Magic to overwhelm and dominate through the sheer display of raw power... much like how he enforces his will onto others. He desires to control all beneath him so that they can understand his might," Sombra continued, looking to his own reflection in the water. "So it's like a mirror. My arcane magic will reveal upon looking through the core of who I am."
The dream faun nodded. "But that's th' question, isnae it? Fa is Sombra? Dae ye ken?"
"W-what? Of course, I know! I'm me... aren't I?"
"Ahh! But there's th' hesitation--the doobt within ye. Ye main hink ye ken fa yer ur. But yer nae fully certain if that's fa ye want tae be."
He growled. "Quit confusing me with your zen riddles, goat! I don't have time for this!"
"'En make time," she laughed. "Otherwise, ye wulnae learn a proper hin'. Impulsiveness an' arrogance blin' ye, Sombra. Unless ye can lit gang an' swatch ben th' darkness cloodin' yer heart, ye cannae unlock th' power ye wish."
His horn glowed to strike magic as his teeth bared; a sharp glare stared straight at the goat woman's serene expression. And through her smile and relaxed gaze, Sombra found himself become less tense and frustrated with her. She was... so calm. A certain level of mindlessness, yet aware enough that should he strike, she would be ready to counter.
And so, as he slowly took a deep breath and hung his head; magic disappearing from the glow of his horn, he began to close his eyes and think more about her question.
'Who am I?'
'Who is Sombra?'
Ewe would slowly take a few steps back, giving the dark unicorn a bit of space. "Guid... Listen tae mah voice as ye ponder yer min', Sombra. Whit dae ye feel aroond ye?"
"Cold..." he scoffed.
"Whit else..?"
"... The wind... Blowing around me... The snow beneath my hooves... The light rays of the sun against my back... but otherwise, cold."
"Noo... Whit dae ye feel inside?"
Whatever trance she was putting on him, it was working. Because Sombra's world right now was oblivion. Outside, he could still feel the cold winds of winter push past him, carrying flakes of snow through his main and clothes. Inside, he was left alone to his feelings, his thoughts. His insecurities. Still, the question kept calling to him, demanding him.
'Who is Sombra?'
He was a tyrant. A black-hearted stallion who practiced in the dark arts and enslaved an entire empire under his iron hoof. He did horrible things to so many mares and stallions. He struck them, murdered them, raped them. He was just as bad, if not worse, than the caribou.
'Is that true?'
Of course, it was! He wouldn't deny he didn't do any of it. He did! And he took pride in his acts. He worked his way from being a poor foal, with everyone rejecting and casting him into the shadows. The very shadows he would use to take his revenge. He was justified! He was proud of what he has done.
'Are you happy?'
His facial expression softened at this question that appeared in his mind. Happiness wasn't an option. The only times he could remember being happy was in his foal hood; playing with a long lost friend and going on adventures together... until she betrayed him. Until she fled from the mere sight of him during that night...
Visions began to flash before his mind now. The mortified look on her face, the sadness in her crystalline eyes. His shadow loomed one her like a dark omen. And just like that, she fled the scene, his hand reaching out to stop her... the very same hand now clutched into a fist through harsh breath.
"Thaur it is," Ewe whispered. "Th' unhappiness in yer sool. Th' pleadin' greit o release frae th' destiny yer boond yerself tay. Go tae it, Sombra. Confront th' feelings ye've bin rejectin' fur sae lang noo."
Sombra couldn't believe he was doing this. Years upon years of scheming and anger, ready to lash out at the world and give in to the hatred and fear he brought out in people. And yet here he was, meditating under the counsel of some weird goat person with who he shared no relation. A spark flashed before his mind. A spark of red that made him gasp.
"That's it!" she quietly urged. "Cùm a 'dol!"
Along with the flashes of red, the images and memories got worse. The many faces of worry and screaming from the people he ridiculed. The vicious glares and judgmental sneers from Celestia and Luna as they fought from his castle. The burning light of the crystal heart being charged up before rejecting his presence.
The bell.
The sound that plagued his mind ever since his awakening; now visualized before as it rang over and over. The flashes of red now began to swirl around him; a tornado of faces and magic everywhere. His body trembled; his hands clutched tightly together as his breathing became heavy. Never had he felt so much immense pressure inside him. How long had he been storing this much raw emotion and power? Focusing in now, he felt one last question, possibly the most important one of all.
'Are you evil?'
Sombra had been called many things; evil is the most common. His deeds back then were defiantly selfish, destructive, and despicable. But was it also not for the good of the kingdom? He remembered back how the former ruler had tricked him about his origin, how he was merely a pawn to an expedient in 'rehabilitating his kind.' Sombra was an outsider from the very beginning. And that outsider would later become the very monster they claimed him to be. And any that opposed him would suffer his wrath.
Yes. He was evil. He was evil in the means that he had to be evil. Good ponies offered him no place, no home. And now those very ponies had lost there's. How ironic that he was now the one pony with the capability to bring them back to light. The one who surely imprisons them again should they try to oppose him. They feared him, as they should. But they also needed him.
Sombra's body began to emanate the swirling black and red vortex of power inside him, causing a gust to lift him off the ground slowly. Ewe stared with wide eyes as the dark stallion ascended. His eyes finally opened; the once smoky haze and green now extinguish as a pure white glow lit his sockets.
This was Sombra. He would become above the concept of good or evil. He would reclaim Equestria and raise a new era of his own, whether he had the ponies' loyalty before him or their hatred. But above all, he would command their respect in defeating the usurper that was Dainn and his caribou. A smile lit the faun's expression.
"Mealaibh ur naidheachd, general! Ye hae discovered th' potent arcane magic within ye! An' as predicted, it is enormoos!"
Sombra gazed over to his hands, taking in this newfound power. It felt incredible. It felt strong. It felt... like himself. The smile on his face was similar to a Pegasus discovering the joys of flying for the first time. With a deep breath, he released the energy before landing on his hooves. The arcane magic vanished as his eyes returned to their familiar red slits. He was still looking over these hands, light red smoke emanating from his fingertips.
"I've never felt so much power! I couldn't fathom I was capable of wielding so much magic. I-I..!" He paused as his gaze soften to the faun before her. Without any hesitation, he bowed his head before her hooves once more. "... I thank you for this gracious lesson, Lady Ewe. With this newfound energy, I will ensure that the future of Equestria returns to its people... And to its rightful ruler~" he added in with a sly smirk to his lips. Her expression did not fault in the slightest, only chuckling as she turned around.
"Woods nae hae it any other way... general Sombra."
He rose back to his hooves, following her away from the running stream. "So now that I've unlocked this power, do I know of my 'Onoma'?"
"That is fur ye tae discover," She said. "Aw Ah coods dae fur ye is give ye th' pathway. Whit ye fin' oan 'at path will be yers an' yers aloyn. Arcane magic is naturally vague, but it is th' purest way ay understandin' th' responsibilities an' gifts ye'll acquire."
Sombra considered her words carefully before nodding. His mind did feel much clearer now that all the burdening emotion and thoughts had quiet down a bit. There were many questions left unsolved, he knew. But for now, he would focus on discovering the true potential of his power. "I see..."
"Sae, general," Ewe resumed while casting a gleeful grin in his direction. "It woods seem ye'll require a new lieutenant. Applejack has wished tae step doon fur a while noo. Dae ye hae anyain in min' 'at coods tak' 'er place?"
"LIEUTENANT!? ME!???"
"I did say you would make a grand one, have I not?"
"Okay, that was back when you were gloating on the whole 'taking back Equestria for myself' shtick. I didn't think you were serious!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, walking alongside Sombra as she gave him a proper tour of the campsite once he returned with Lady Ewe.
"How could I not be?" He said with a raised brow. "I find you a capable mare to aid me in this upcoming siege."
"B-But like... I can't fly. There are like... tons of stronger Pegasi here that can--"
Sombra let out a sigh before pulling her around to face him properly. "Dash... Do you not think that If I wanted a strong flyer, I wouldn't have singled them out. Any Pegasus can fly. No... What I value more out of you than anyone is your sense of stability. You stand firmly by your comrades and friends, carrying the will never to surrender."
Dash could only gaze up with widening eyes at the tyrant's words. She knew he was blunt about her being replaceable for any Pegasus, but to come out in telling her how her loyalty was valued; It was... so unlike him. To say that Sombra of all ponies could say something not so condescending and empowering was a trait she thought had long since died elsewhere from the small group of rebels.
"I... I don't know what to say, but... Thanks... erm... Ahem!" She cleared her throat, struggling to hide her bashfulness and gratitude as she peered away. "I mean, I've always known I was an awesome and inspiring role model. Course I'd be perfect for the job!"
A soft chuckle managed to escape the former king's mouth as a sly grin spread his features. "As long as you know your place, my lieutenant, and do as I command. The caribou won't have a leg to stand once we're through with them."
"Fucking bet!" She laughed, lighting, punching him in the shoulder as they continued. They would continue as she showed him to the different tents and stations mares were working at. They were still unsure how they felt about an ancient evil stallion now put into a position of power from the looks of it. He could tell by the wary glances and nervousness in their voice when responding to him. This was going to be a lot more challenging than he expected.
"Word to the wise, Sombra," Rainbow whispered as they moved around the section. "Maybe you can show a more... how we'd say... friendlier side to you. That way, it'll help look over your previous actions a little so they can trust and depend on you. I'd start with Spike and Applejack as they're going to be your most prominent allies in this war." The cyan mare suggested. "Unless... y'know, you think you can't be a condescending asshat for more than two minutes when talking with ponies~."
A steady glare was pointing at her confident smirk. "Off to a fantastic start, aye, lieutenant? And after I decided to raise your morals a bit too."
"Oh, you just decided now, hmm? Meaning you only said that so that you can make yourself look good and have me cooperate?!"
"But of course," He mused, tilting his head up to show off his superiority. "I'm general now, and I say whatever I want to have these ponies look up and respect me, as I am deserving of it."
"The only thing you deserve is a swift kick in the ass, General Dick Wad."
"Hmph!" he smiled slightly before turning his gaze towards the large dragon, currently enjoying a drink with his soldiers and mares. The light-hearted laughter coming from him helped take away the ferocious beast; he was a few moments ago. "... I've ruled a kingdom and managed my subjects with an iron fist. Making... friends with a dragon and an earth pony shouldn't waste too much of my time."
Rainbow's grin brightened as she crossed her arms under her short bust. "Well, when you put them like that, you're going to need all the time in the world to get those two to agree with you. Good luck, General Wafflecunt!" And with a playful salute, she went off to see if any scouts had returned about any information towards the parade.
The dark unicorn's grin slowly disappeared as he stared off at the group of rebels a few feet away from him. It had been a long time since he seemed a friend. Such a silly thing to consider at a time like this; making friends with beings who hated his very guts. Yet it was those very same beings that foiled him years ago; all through unity and the trust and love they shared. Could he really earn that much from them..?
He let out a sigh. No, of course, he didn't deserve that. He didn't even want that. He found no use when they needed to counter-attack the menace holding their kingdom captive. If anything, he needed the time to figure out his trait. The arcane magic within his vessel was potent; he could feel it. But there was much-untapped power he needed to dig into.
He briefly looked to the dragon again, remembering their short skirmish. The intense aura surged around him as he fumbled and broke through his dark crystalline magic. As much as he disdained in acknowledging someone else's power, Spike certainly held a firm grasp over this arcane magic, if not for his temper. The little dragon that kept away his destiny had grown to be quite the warrior. Perhaps, playing nice with him would help Sombra unlock the power swirling within him...
Any motive to move towards the dragon general was halted when he felt something soft and squishy press against his back. He also found that his arms were unable to move until he realized he was locked in a tight hug. Startled, he turned back to find the pink mare having wrapped herself close to the stallion, a big smile on her face and wide blue eyes staring deeply into the slitted reds of Sombra.
"O-Oh... It's you! Ahem. Good day, Miss Pie," He greeted awkwardly. She nodded her head and squeezed tighter in her hug. He could feel her ample bosom squishing more and more into his back. He cleared his throat, turning away. "Y-Yes... This is... Very nice, eheh... Mmm, could you please release me?" he asked, and not a moment did he find breathing room as the earth pony happily skipped in front of him; curves, and hair jiggling with each bound. It was just... so bizarre to see such a childish display of joy in such a bleak and horrible predicament.
"Is there something I can help you with?" he asked, to which she nodded her head before taking his arm and pulling him away. He reluctantly went along as he watched as the group of dragons grew further and further away. It would seem that tapping into his newfound magic and discussing strategy would have to be put on hold for now.
"Where are you taking me? Why must we leave the resistance grounds?" he asked, to no reply. From the looks of her motions, Pinkie would be humming if such sweet sounds were possible. They had ventured into the forest, though not too far where the camp wasn't out of sight. Soon enough, Pinkie stopped in her tracks... before slamming Sombra up into a tree, a vicious glare replacing her once happy expression. The sudden mood switch caught him off guard as he struggles to move. Was this all a ruse? How long was she keeping this act?! Good lord, was this mare strong!
"What is the meaning of this! We're allies, aren't we?!" He growled, glaring in confusion. She tilted her head with an arched brow, giving an expression that said, 'are we?'. To then, he understood. This mare wasn't going to allow him close to her friends unless he were willing to become on himself. He was on the verge of ranting, biting her head off for holding such a stupid ideal over the fate and lives of survivors!
Yet... He couldn't ignore how close the bones in his arms were to breaking.
"A-Aghhfft! Alright, what is it you want?! I'll do it! Ill... Ugh... I'll be more friendly to you and your comrades... Will that suffice you?" He asked teeth clenched as the pressure kept pushing... and pushing... until finally, it released as Pinkie backed away, a confident smile on her lips as she nodded. Sombra panted as he rubbed his bruised wrists while gazing over the sturdy mare.
"Has anyone ever told you how monstrously strong you are?" he asked. Pinkie shrugged her shoulders before she kneeled to cheek over his arms before providing a small kiss to where it looked bruised the most. His cheeks flourished a bit while the silly-looking pink mare stuck her tongue out of him.
"You seem so... chipper for someone who lost both their life and their tongue. How do you do it?" he questioned. Her smile slow pulled downwards as she sighed. Narrowing her gaze, she stood up with her chest puffed up, fists to her hip while the other pounded her torso in salute. Sombra could only grow more confused at what she was trying to communicate.
"I'm terribly sorry. I'm not... Understanding," He confessed. Pinkie rolled her eyes before she yanked him up to his feet before positioning his limbs to do the same as she was, beating her chest once more. Her other hand than gestured to the woods; how dead the trees look among the pale snow and the hazy grey mist that hung the air; a reminder of the caribou's influence affecting the land before pointing back to the resistance camp before pointing back to her.
After considering the directions, realization washed over Sombra before he gave a small nod to what it was she was getting at. "I see... You're right. This place is unfortunately looking, and the hardships you and your friends must have faced were horrifying. You're trying to keep to the bright side of things... And actively encourage yourself and others to make the best of your situation, as bleak as it is. That's why you're bouncing for joy and sharing so much affection..."
The smile on her face was one he had yet to see. The pure joy and happiness that tingled from her body sprang up as she flung herself onto him, taking them both into the ground. Grunting, he managed to let out a weak chuckle as she constricted herself to him once more to give Equestria's villainous savor a tender and crushing hug, this time being able to return it. It really was hard to be mad at someone so determined to help ponies bounce back on their feet.
Her eyes widened before she pulled up before checking down... And then rolling her head up with a much more seductive expression. It took a few seconds to realize that between their joined hips was a growing bulge in Sombra's uniform. It seems time had passed for the atmosphere to take influence. And judging how quickly the two of them became aroused, it was growing strong by the days...
"O-Oh my..." That was all he could muster to say as his eyes began to travel along Pinkie's curvaceous figure clad in that tight jumpsuit. As childish as she was, she was still a grown mare... A big, well endowed mare. She took notice before she leaned in to steal small peaks and kisses over Sombra's muzzle, easing into the feelings inspiring between them. His hands would reach for hers to hold her still, pulling her away.
"W-Wait!" he insisted, a heavy gaze looking over her. "A-As much as I would... love that kind of company, we really can't be doing this! There's only so much time before..." She pulled her arm free to place a finger to his lips, shushing him. She fluttered her eyes at him and tenderly smiled as she leaned closer. At this moment, the dark unicorn knew he wasn't going anywhere until she had her taste of the scrumptious piece of baked meat pie that was Sombra.
And who was he to deny her a taste?
He allowed her to resume kissing him, feeling her lips suck and pluck over his own. The more she spent sucking on his face, the more wet and heated the kisses became. His bulge stood tall in his crotch, pressed between her squishy thighs while he felt the heat of her loins grind against it. His moans muffled loudly over hers; the feeling of her fingers trace over his broad muscles and torso before tugging down at the zipper to reveal his dark grey skin. His own hands got to relish in feeling the weight of her stacked chest, thumbs pressed and digging into the hard nubs that appeared in her own suit. Once the zipper was down, Pinkie would begin to pull down her own zipper; teasingly slow to give the baffled unicorn some suspense as he watched glimpses of her pink body begin to reveal itself.
Throwing in a cheeky little wink, Pinkie would slide it off her shoulders before her large breasts jiggled out of their containments, hard rosy nipples on display. In all his intimate adventures, never had Sombra seen such rounded, natural mammaries. They must have been at least an E cup! The mare cupped his hands to approach her two mountain peaks before gasping slightly from how rough, and big his hands were, wiggling in her place while Sombra massaged and caressed her tits around as if they were dough.
While he was busy playing with her chest, the pink mare brought her hand down to try and fish out his cock; a bit of drool dripping from her lips at the thought and feeling behind how big he was. Finally, she backed herself away to properly take out Sombra's dick, leaving the stallion a little upset that he couldn't continue to grope at her tit flesh.
By now, his erection was at full mass, thick veins bulging out from his black cock. She marveled over it, eyes and wide and curious as a cat as she measured it up to be as long and thicker than her forearm. Licking at her lips, she helped spread the tyrant's legs out to get herself more comfortable, her pillowy breasts pressed against his hefty sack. Sombra could only moan and pant at the euphoria of feeling how soft and squishy Pinkie was while she showered his fat cock with small tender kisses and licks.
"Gods..." he groaned, briefly closing his eyes to surrender to the working mouth and lips of the earth mare. That tongue of hers was licking up his girth like it was her favorite flavor of ice cream, eventually sitting at the tip to lick up any pre-cum he was building. Once his eyes looked back to meet the sapphire blues of Pink, all that stared back was an intense hunger. The same hunger an animal gives when they have starved for days and finally came across food. And there was no doubt in his mind;
Pinkie was going to devour ever last inch of his cock.
In one motion, nearly every piece of black horse cock had vanished in her maw; the sudden impact striking Sombra deep in his loins as he loud cry escaped his voice.
'Holy mother of... her throat's so tight!'
He could feel his member twitch happily in the back of her throat, her muscles contracting to hold him in place as she focuses on breathing through her nose. Then... she began to bob her head along his length, sucking and gurgling over his meaty stick. Never in his life had a mare taken him so deep down her throat in one swoop. Even the concubines he forced to deep throat, he couldn't manage his shaft without choking. And yet here Pinkie was, slobbering and drooling over his groin while stuffing her face with his dick like it were a popsicle. The 'gawking' noise muffled from her only served to keep him nice and hard, leaking his potent fluid directly into her tummy.
His mind, however, was growing to a dark place as memories of his actions came to play. He remembered one night, one of his guards forced a farm mare to his bedroom. From there, he forced her to service him as a king righteously deserved. Voices were whispering in his mind, slithering thoughts to enact those same impulses onto Pinkie. His hand-shaped, hovering towards her head as the imagery became more vivid and real. The feelings of someone so helpless to do nothing but submit to him and take his licking like a good little sl--
He felt his hand got smacked away as his cock was left open in the cool air, dripping in spit. His eyes snapped open as he stared down at the narrowed gaze of Pinkie. She shook her head, quietly telling him to keep his hands to himself. Gulping down his regret for the loss of control temporarily, he nodded. A coy smile returned as she let some of her salivae flowed down into the valley of her ample titties. Once they were all nice and slick, she hugged her breasts together around his schlong, stroking them around to resume her oral play. Sombra lost himself once more to the warmth and softness her breasts gave when enveloping his cock inside. The small licks and suck from the tip of his dick made him shiver all together as the pink mare played with her treat.
Sombra was in heaven. The cold, brutal world outside slowly drifted away as he was left to feel the warmth and marshmallowy texture of his lover's breasts. Continuous circles of flesh messing into his rigid member while her mouth sucked and slurped up that sweet, creamy pre-cum; hoping to coax the real meal out of him. And soon enough, her efforts were rewarded as Sombra let out a hefty moan as she milked his cock of thick ropes of white-hot spunk to feed her. Gulping soon replaced her grunts as she drank straight from his tap before pulling off with a wet 'pop.' Pinkie let out a sigh. She licked up any cum that dripped or missed from her mouth before giving his dick one more smooch, thanking it for the yummy supply of stallion milk. Her lustful gaze returned to Sombra, eating up his expression and heavy breathing, the near gazed look in his eyes.
She began to tap his cock lightly against her jiggly tit as if to test how hard he still was before she climbed her way back up to straddle on top of him. Before his vision could come to refocus, his world was overtaken in pink as she pressed his face close to one of her fat boobs. It would seem it was his turn to feed.
Lapping at his lips like a hungry foal for breast milk, he latches onto her puffy nipple before sucking and nibbling onto it, hands reaching to keep her twin from feeling left out. If Pinkie could speak, she would be moaning sweetly, he bet. He could tell by how she held and stroked through his black flowing mane and very soft pants she was making that she was enjoying this. He even heard a high pitch squeak as he tugged on her tit to stretch out before release it to jiggle in place, proceeding to pamper her other breast.
Was this what it was like to make others happy? To be happy yourself? It was a strange new emotion Sombra wasn't familiar with. Never had he'd thought he'd be so... comforted and free in the embrace and arms of another pony. It felt so soft... and wet... and tight! Very incredibly tight!
He muffled in shock before realizing what was happening. In the middle of losing himself to this feeling, the chubby little minx managed to sneak his throbbing member into her wet little hole, gyrating her hips around while squeezing down on his cock. It felt like she was trying to keep him trapped inside her with zero intentions to release him.
And then she began to bounce.
Pinkie arched her back in a curve to keep Sombra's face mushed into her tits while riding the stallion in loud, thick bounds. All he could really do was muffle and moaned into her cleavage. The pleasure his body was going through was intense. His cock felt like it could snap from how tightly her cunt was sucking him in. His hands would slide away down her hips before finding an overflowing feel of flesh that was her luscious ass cheeks. Sombra had been so distracted by the mare's bosom he didn't realize how undoubtedly thick Pinkie was. All he could do was dig his fingers into her flanks while she hopped happily on his pogo stick.
Soon, the elation spiked up as Pinkie clutched hard onto her dark lover, silently screaming out before Sombra felt a rush of mare juice splash into his groan, causing him to hit climax once again. While not as powerful as the previous, the lower amount of cum shot deep into her love tunnel was received much to the earth mare's delight. Her mare hood let up to allow his cock to slip out and finally begin to grow soft as the two ponies laid close together in the warm afterglow of their lay.
This was the first time Sombra was not in control. How could he? Pinkie asserted her authority and led him to pleasures; he never thought he'd experience. He felt... fulfilled, for once. Like his endless hunger and thirst for power and control was finally stated by having another take charge. His heavy eyes looked to see the pink beauty catching her breath while nuzzling her head softly into his chest. She, too, looked secure in his arms...
A smile managed to creep its way over his muzzle. Not a cocky, sadistic or sarcastic grin he was known for. He was genuinely smiling, simply... enjoying his time with her.
'Perhaps there were things I could learn and appreciate from these ponies after all...'
Sighing, he would gently lift the two of them before placing the groggy mare back on her feet, wobbling for balance as they both struggled to put on their clothes. Just as she adjusted her boobs back into her jumpsuit before zipping them up, she looked up to see Sombra, a cold look returning to his face that made her tilt her head in concern.
"This was very risky, Miss Pie," he stated. "The enemy could have been around and catch us right outside. Such mischief and recklessness will not be permitted among my troops." He leaned his head closer, a sinister smile spreading his lips as he whispered. "See to it you don't do this again... Otherwise, I might have to punish you~."
Pinkie would smile brightly before nodding, offering another wink before stealing one more kiss from the stallion before the both of them hurried back into the camp before anyone could discover where they were.
Sombra was very thankful they had a showering stall. Otherwise, the scent of musk and fifth would have brought a lot of concern to the many mares that would often stare at him. Drying out his mane, the dark stallion exited out of the entrance while zipping up his clothes... only to find a large purple dragon standing in front of him. His eyes drifted up to see the hard press glare while he offered a dull gaze.
"Sombra."
"Dragon."
"Spike," he corrected.
"Just making sure we would be on a first-name basis. Now, how may I help you, Spike?" he asked.
He grunted before tilting his head towards the front of the camp. "Walk with me."
Sombra agreed, and so the two of them began their walk in silence. They dare not look at each other, not giving the other acknowledgment outside of gestures.
"So... Lady Ewe decided you were worthy of knowing archaic magic."
"That she has."
"Figured out your Onoma?"
"It's a working progress."
"Hmph."
"Surely, this isn't the only thing you wish to talk to me about. It makes for very... awkward conversation if you haven't noticed..."
Spike let out a sigh before finally stopping to look at the stallion properly. "Look. Let's not beat around the bush here; I despise you and everything you stand for. It also puts a bad taste in my throat that Lady Ewe would even suggest allowing you to lead her fraction." The more he spoke, the more his fist squeezed tightly before releasing.
"That being said, I see the reasoning and... I do want us to be on civil terms. So... truce?" he suggested, offering his hand in front of him. Sombra looked back between the large scaly paw and the dragon before he slowly took out his own hand and shook it briefly. "Truce... At least until after I've secured the kingdom under my rule. You've become a much more capable fighter... I wouldn't mind another go at you~."
Spike growled before he pulled him closer, staring down the shadowy unicorn into the eye. "I want you to listen carefully, Sombra. These aren't just pawns in your own little mind game. These are people. Actual lives with value in their own way. My friends. And they're looking at you to help build them a better Equestria than the one the Caribou took away from us."
Sombra narrowed his own gaze. "I am very much aware of the consequences. I was a ruler."
"A vile one at that! One who threw away the lives and hypnotized the weak into doing his bidding through fear and violence. That's not what Equestria is going to become again. Not while I live, you hear me. So whatever plot you've got scheming, I suggest you drop it." His voice lowered to a rumbling growl as his eyes glowed a brilliant emerald. "Because I swear to you... So help me, Sombra, if I find out you're responsible for any of my friends getting killed or captured... I will bring the wrath of go--"
"SOMEBODY HELP! WE'VE FOUND MORE REFUGEES!" Came a loud cry from the gate. Both of them tore away from each other before rushing towards the commotion as everyone's attention was called to the entrance. Shoving his way, Spike looked through before finding Smolder, standing still with an expression of horror on her. Sombra slowly moved his way through the crowd, the murmuring and whimpers growing louder.
"Smolder. The report, what's going on?!"
"S-Sir..." She said hesitantly, pointing a finger towards two robed bodies lying into the ground. Sombra could make out a familiar stylized mane, colored in deep blues and purple. The other unmoving body held long, messy hair in a shade of light pink. Both had lavender-colored collars clasped around their throats.
'Wait... Don't tell me these are--'
"N-No..."
He turned to see the look of despair written on Spike's face, tears streaming down his eyes.
"Rarity... Fluttershy... What have they done!?" |
Fall of Equestria: Throes of Winter | ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕍𝕀: 𝒟𝓊𝑒𝓁 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒟𝑒𝓈𝓅𝑜𝓉𝓈 | Trepidation hung in the frozen air over the harrowing sight of Fluttershy and Rarity. Each mare's defiled form was drench in dried cum and crudely written marker labeling the most profane of statements over each limb and asset. A short look to their overstretched genitals didn't leave much to the imagination as to how thoroughly stretched out they were. But perhaps the most unsettling was the fit of giggles from the unicorn, eying her old friends with a derange twitch in her eye.
"C-C c c cock? So much! Cock! Whore get... C-cock!? Heheahah!! Hahahahaah~!" She struggled to lift her once cherished form to pull her stuff up against Spike's pants, the dragon staring incredulity. His body flinched away when she tried to tug down his pants, fist-shaking in unbridled fury.
"No... Rarity, not you..!" Spike said softly, reaching to pull his old crush to his arms. Rarity responded by pressing and rubbing her body into his armored chest, shivering from the cold winds whipping. Rainbow Dash, Pinkie, and Applejack clutched over their hearts, absolutely devastated to see what had become of their friends.
Sombra, too, was shaken up. His gaze fell onto Fluttershy, trembling like a leaf while clutching her pale body. Her eyes remained wide and sunken, almost unblinking. The smallest of whimpers escaping her lips. Staring up at the imposing stallion reported in the yellow pegasus to fearfully shrink herself closer into her arms and legs.
The dark unicorn had never seen anypony rendered catatonic to such a horrendous degree. Not even the lowly whelps Sombra tormented into servitude were abused this badly. The dark markings around her wrists and legs showed how tightly she had been bound up for the caribou's sick pleasure.
Oona Ewe knelt to urge the frightened pegasus into her arms gently, yet she remained unresponsible through the goat's comforting gestures. "Aon bhochd," she lamented with a sorrowful expression. "Th' cariboo's damage might be too severe... Ahm not sure Ah can help them."
"What!?" Rainbow Dash cut in, defiant to believe the faun's words. "No, that no true! You have to help! These are our friends!"
"Rainbow, please--"
"NO! Work up your arcane magic or whatever and heal them!!"
"Rainbow Dash!" Oona silenced her with a stern tone. "Mah magic can only help those within th' dream realm. E'en if Ah cood, th' constant trauma an' sufferin' they've endured cannae be erased. It woods tak' years fur their minds tae recover ..." her head lowered, shame clear on her face that there was nothing more she could do. "Ah am sorry... but Ah fear Rarity an' Fluttershy ur tint forever..."
Silence struck the young mare before she collapsed to her knees, eyes filling up with tears as she hunched over. The will to hold back the sobs in her throat vanished with the realization that her friends were too long gone. The arms of Applejack and Pinkie Pie pulled her to their embrace while allowing their sadness to flow bitterly. Spike held onto Rarity, afraid of letting go of the last precious memories he had with her. Every one of the resistant members openly cried and hung their heads low over the tragedy. Of all the casualties they had suffered at the hands of King Dainn and his forces, the near-death states of those who wore purple colors were universally the most horrifying state.
Sombra backed away, his eyes shutting tightly as the burning memories of the faces he saw while practicing his lethal methods in corruption. He could recall how they would cry out for a parent or loved one to save them, how desperately they held onto hope before she stripped it clean from them. The disgusting elation he felt seeing the strong crumble before his feet. And yet, not many days ago, he would consider this justice against his transgressions.
For all the times he assured his would-be allies that he and the caribou were nothing alike, the once radiant unicorn and compassionate pegasus before Sombra stood examples of the cruelty he once indulged in. And the overwhelming guilt, an emotion he would have rejected during his reign over the crystal empire, ran through his system like a sickness. Like the cold winds of winter blowing the snow over them. The reality of the situation did not matter to Sombra, for in his mind, he did this.
And there were many others just like the two-element bearers rendered braindead from the caribou's endless indulgence of control and pleasure.
Opening his crimson orbs, with fists clutched tightly, Sombra took a couple of steps towards the yellow pegasus, silently ushering the goat to step aside. Furrowing her brows at the stallion, Ewe nonetheless did as obliged as Sombra held Flutter up, holding her cheeks by his fingers to scan her unblinking teal eyes. Something as missing, he sensed. Staring intensely into the ridden mare's pupils revealed absolute darkness within.
But within the void and lifelessness of her eyes, a small glimpse of life flickered. A choir of overwhelming voices, commanding her to listen to male demands and worship masculine power. And trapped within the dominating chorus was a whimpering cry for help.
Sombra jerked his head back in alarm. 'What was that just now?' he questioned. 'Clearly, I was sensing... something? It was fear, but not like before.'
"Sombra..?" Ewe's voice cut him out of his thoughts. "Whit did ye see?"
The dark stallion rose back, feeling the conflicted and interrogating looks among the allies. "I'm not sure," he answered. "There was darkness... voices, compelling me to submit and obey. And underneath, I heard her voice... she's so afraid."
"Fluttershy? Y-You heard her?" Rainbow's strained voice spoke up, wiping away the tears staining her cheeks.
He nodded. "I think there's more to this than the trauma of being raped relentlessly. This feels like sorcery was involved to ensure this one's mind is bombarded with the caribou's mantra of misogyny. I would... often place a similar mind-breaking spell during my colder years," he admitted, regret evident in his tone. "But if it is a form of brainwash, there may be a way to break it. And if your friend's plea is anything, she's still fighting in there. Somewhere..."
"So what you're saying is," Spike added in, stroking Rarity's mane while the oblivious unicorn was trying to pry open his armored vest. "We find the source; we can save them?"
"Perhaps," Sombra stated considerably. "But to do that, we must go to the source. And it's not hard to figure out who is responsible."
Everypony nodded in agreement before Sombra turned to address the crowd of rebels before them.
"This madness ends with the death of Dainn. It may seem that the odds are stacked against us, given how outnumbered we are. But it is through my will that victory shall await us in Ponyille!"
The looks of uncertainty were not lost on him, given that moments ago, he cursed them for holding him accountable for his prior actions as an enemy to the Crystal Empire. But deep down, Sombra understood that he needed to show these struggling survivors a leader they could trust.
"Your concerns are not disregarded; I know I am the last pony you want as a leader. I have brought so much wrong to Equestria in my pursuit of power. I've committed crimes that could rival the caribou in abhorrence. I will not ask for forgiveness nor respect in that regard. What I am asking is for you to fight alongside me, to show these putrid barbarians that their time in Equestria is over! The caribou only see you as weak, breakable things that are better off in chains, tending to their every wanton need." Sombra marched around so that his voice may carry over to the rebels in the back, staring into each troop's eye.
"Before me are not the slaves of caribou, but the warriors of Equestria. This is our land, our home! And the time has come for us to reforge our once magical and powerful country into greater glory. The Ponyville parade comes within two days. This is our only real shot to strike at their king and lay down vengeance! Ponies of Equestria, I ask you once more; will you stand with me? Will you fight with me!?"
The tense silence hung in the cold air like fog. It took the dark stallion every fiber to not falter under the weight of doubt growing. And just as it seemed Sombra's speech failed to inspire the rebels, a new voice spoke behind him.
"I will fight!" Rainbow Dash stood up, a determined gleam in her eyes while nodding at the dark unicorn, a knowing smile shared between them.
"Aah'm fightin' too," Applejack added in, tipping her hat.
Pinkie bounced up with renewed swagger, nodding her head.
"I will fight with you," Spike accepted, turning to his small forces, which saluted. Smolder nodded her head.
Ewe bowed her head while cradling Fluttershy's shivering form.
"I-I will fight!"
"Me too!!"
"I'll fight!"
"Yeah! Let's put an end to those pigs!!"
Soon, a chorus of brave rebel soldiers rose their arms, adding their voices to the cause before. Sombra was in disbelief that nearly all of them took a salute before his command. Something swelled within him, a new feeling he had not felt before. And that emotion burned as he rose his fist into the air.
"Then follow me! Gather everything we have to ensure the caribou's demise is at hand! At the winter parade, we take back our pride and dignity! Together, Dainn will fall! Together... EQUESTRIA WILL RISE!!"
The rebels bellowed in unison, their pain and misery brought out in a mighty battle cry. Sombra could help but smile boldly at the strength and power he had motivated in the camp's mares and refugees. Casting a steady glance to his comrades and the enigmatic leader, he could see hope return in their eyes. And though their hope, he would carry this strength and unleash it upon Dainn and his forces.
"Soldiers! Assemble your weapons and prepare for the raid!"
"Yes, sir!"
Daylight rose over the snow ridden ground, the falling of flakes having ceased. Yet dark clouds swirled closer towards the sun, impending to cover the skies in grey once more. Sombra stood still on a ledge, making out the small number of houses making up Ponyville in the distance. Adorning his physique was brand new armor he forged, using crystalline and steel material to forge braces, a chest plate, and leg guards over his clothes. A new red cape flapped around in the wind, a remnant of his old regal wear. To say that the dark stallion was heavily equipped for the battle ahead was an understatement.
Within the long hours before today, he wasted nothing to figure the best vantage points to access the town, formations should the fight start unexpectedly. Making sure every one of the troops had a weapon of some kind to arm themselves. Nopony was allowed to leave until the plan was finalized. All that remained was Lady Ewe's command, to send the resistance forth and scout the small town held firmly in the grasp of caribou soldiers.
And yet, he was to stay behind?
The dream faun did not explain her reasoning, only that it would be a tactical advantage that the general remained here until a scout returned with a single. Then he would lead the rest of the party to secure Ponyville and purge it free of Dainn's tyranny. And something about the look she gave him this morning told Sombra it was important he hold back in camp.
"You look about ready to fuck shit up," a voice complimented behind him. The brooding stallion turned to his lieutenant, wearing a modified jumpsuit. The former pegasus offers a smile while approaching Sombra. "A shame you won't be joining us on the frontlines until later."
"It is not my place to disobey the orders of Lady Ewe, though I am free to voice my discontent with her decision," he commented before staring off into the distance. "I should be fighting alongside you..."
"I mean, when you think of it, it makes sense. You're our trump card; we don't want to play it too early when we have the element of surprise. Chances are, Dainn doesn't know a thing about you."
"No. I suspect there's an explanation as to why she wants me to remain here. I've yet to discover the Onoma to my arcane magic through all my vigorous training and strategies. Maybe she's found a way to help me awaken it before joining the raid... Still, something could go around. You all might be in trouble if I am not there."
"Hey, now, that sounds like doubt! What, you think we can't handle ourselves out there? We've been fighting these numbskulls for months on end!" Rainbow rebuffed, shaking her head. "This is our shot in returning peace. We're not gonna waste it. We'll hold them off for as long as we need until you come to back us up."
The insistent and confident smirk on the mare's face caused a similar curl of his lip. She was right. How dare he doubt the ponies of the resistance. Doubt would lead to their downfall, and that was not an option. He would believe in his lieutenant and their cause, as they would believe in him.
"General Sombra," Spike's voice called to them, drawing the ponies to the dragon and his troops, forming a line at the entrance. "We're about to head off. The parade should be starting at any moment. I urge you to finish up your preparations quickly." He offered a small grin moving forward to the stallion, reaching his claw, which he accepted in a firm shake.
"Good luck out there," Sombra nodded. Rainbow would wrap an arm around him for a quick squeeze, causing the stallion to momentarily freeze as she joined between Smolder and Pinkie Pie along with the soldiers. Everypony pulled out a hood to hide their faces as Oona and Applejack stood by the gate. The dark stallion approached the pair; an eyebrow rose at the earth mare's presence. "You're not joining them?"
She shook her head. "Aah trust them ta handle themselves against da caribou. Somepony's gotta stay behind in case any scouts are around, lookin' for our location," Applejack explained before turning towards the doe. "Though Aah really doesn't git why ya don't send Sombra ta lead them."
"As much as it is traditional fur a king tae fight alongside his comrades, Ah must object tae that notion," Ewe shook her head, staring knowingly at Sombra. "Thaur is somethin' Ah need ye tae dae first. Somethin' 'at will unlock yer hidden potential an' show ye th' power ye seek."
"And what might that be?"
Before she could utter a word of her plan, a loud boom echoed from a distance.
"It's starting! A firework went off!" one scout exclaimed loudly.
A few more 'bangs' followed to signify the start of the celebration. Oona pulled away to draw attention to herself, summoning as much authority she could muster with her voice.
"Th' parade has started, everypony. Th' time is noo tae secure th' parade an' bring these strugglin' times tae an end. Dean sabaid air! Fur Equestria!"
"For Equestria!!" the resistance echoed before Spike leads his troops onward. Sombra watched as the last mares in the rear disappeared into the forest before the gates sealed themselves. He dug his fingers into his palm, beyond nervous for the worst to happen without his guidance. Yet he swallowed down more doubt, determined to see this through before Oona placed a hand to pull him towards her direction.
"Come, Sombra. We must go an' discover yer Onoma quickly!"
Festive music played throughout the main district. War banners waved high above the roofs--a cacophony of moans from mares, some clamoring for more and others pleading for mercy.
The Ponyville winter parade had just begun.
A crowd full of caribou and ponies gathered around the streets as platforms slowly moved through the village, hosting plenty of eye candy and lewd displays. One float had many mares clad in skimpy holiday clothing, showing off their breasts and marehoods in see-through lace. They dance provocatively for the leering gazes of their male dominant audience, much to the delight in their cheering. Another had two mares make out and fondle each other while tied down against a large, rubber phallus.
And then were the participation floats, where four or more mares stood secured in pilloried. Once the parade came to a small stop, stallions and caribou could climb aboard to take part in the celebration, taking either side to stuff their slut's full. Many would cheer while some became busy slamming into their own slave, weakly crying and struggling to break free from their arms while their bare asses got pounded harshly.
So enthralled in the ecstasy did not one of the caribou regime notice Spike's silhouette gliding through the skies before roosting behind a roof. Riding with him were Rainbow Dash and Smolder, observing the fetish festival as the gloats began to move again. Pinkie and a few of their troops remained hidden in the alleyways, waiting for the moment their commander to give orders to attack.
"Rotten bastards," the former pegasus muttered quietly, staring with disdain over the shivering mares dancing involuntarily. "I swear if this isn't the day these chauvinist pigs aren't put down..."
"It will be," Spike assured with a firm gaze. "They haven't realized we've infiltrator the perimeter. While they indulge in their rampant lust, we seize this day and bring Equestria to liberty."
"Just because we hold the element of surprise doesn't mean things will go accordingly. Something could go wrong, and then what'll--"
"Quiet," Smolder hushed Raindow harshly, glaring off towards the distance as the crowd grew louder and rambunctious. "General... He's here."
Spike followed the female drake's glare, a brief flash of gold in his angry eyes. At long last, the final platform was carried in by war beasts, easily the largest. It looked like the main deck of a ship with a quarter-deck intact. Chained down to their knees, arms folded behind, were the alicorn sisters, Celestia and Luna. The princess of moonlight defiantly struggles in her bonds while the princess of daylight remained docile. Both their manes had been shaven off to better show off the nub of their severed horns. Behind them stood an enormous cage, a velvet curtain covering the contents. Four massive guards stood at arm at each corner of the float.
But the real attraction sat in the large throne embedded to the quarter-deck. Twilight Sparkle came into view, nuzzling and lapping at his hardened member below a seated caribou. There, in all his infamous glory and hubris, was KIng Dainn. The caribou ruler sat adorn in royal blue robes, a fur collar wrapped around his shoulders, jewelry shimmering in the hazy sunlight. Even his antlers were decorated in riches, bracelets coiled and hanging off his horns like ornaments. His icy blue eyes leered over his loyal followers, soldiers, and the petrified mares beneath him.
"Dainn..." The purple drake growled softly, doing his best to calm the fires that burned in his chest. Or quell the urge to lunge at him here and there.
The war beast bellowed before laying down, ending the parade as the float dropped to the ground with a thud. The caribou king rose steadily while tucking his wet dick back into his pants while petting the cumdrunk alicorn affectionately. He rose an arm up to silence the thunderous crowd, a haughty smile spreading his muzzle.
"Citizens of Ponyville," he began. "Thank you kindly for your warm and generous welcome. It is not every day such a small town is graced with magnificence!"
The caribou and stallion rose their voice in a unanimous cheer before settling down.
"Every year, we celebrate this occasion to the day we rid Equestria of its ludicrous tyranny! For it was here that our uprising began before total domination sweep through the entire Equestrian nation. And as appreciation to those of you who have embraced the ways of male supremacy, I'd offer a reward for your endeavors. These lowly alicorn harlots, who so foolishly thought they could offer a kingdom of equality and peace..."
The crowd of mare-haters collectively booed the once-proud princesses, tossing snowballs and half-eaten fruit at the oppressed alicorns.
"... When they should have just offered their cunts and mouths to worship their male subjects. This is why, traditionally, I offer these pathetic ponies to the public; for all to ravage and take out all your pent up frustrations with."
Another clamor of cheers echoed off the buildings and houses, earn Rainbow Dash's scowl. Once more, Dainn rose his hand to cease the uproar.
"But that's not what's going to happen today."
Everyone turned to each other, collectively confused and muttering amongst themselves over this strange decision. King Dainn began to walk down the steps as he continued.
"For you see, there still exists a small group of rebels that oppose my rule. That refuses to submit! That dares to believe they can break the chains we've placed onto our sows and breeding stock!"
Once more, rejective boos and angry bellows resounded from the gathered horde of male chauvinists.
"But heed me, brothers! The only thing that will break is their resolve; once those insufferable sluts are captured and brought forth... to this!"
Pointing his hand towards the cage, his guards pulled away the cover to unveil the bulking, muscular form of a monster, awakening from the sudden exposed light and letting out a loud screech. Every mare gave a terrified scream upon sight while the others gazed with awe. It looked like a bulked-up caribou, but the green pulsating veins, overly proportioned arms, and lifeless unblinking eyes revealed a crueler substance was at hand. Pulsating between it's smaller when compared legs was a penis longer and thicker than anything normal. A stream of pre-cum constantly drooled out of the flat tip. The sheer size of this behemoth caused Luna to stop fighting against her chains, gazing, worrying at it and her sister.
"W-What the fuck is that?!" Rainbow stammered, her eyes wide with terror. Spike and Smolder shook their heads in disbelief. Never would they had suspected the caribou capable of crafting such an abomination against nature. Dainn sported a cruel smirk while gingerly petting the bicep of his creation.
"This... caribou hulk, as I'll call it, was made with magic and alchemy. A volunteer so willing and devoted to our cause has become something greater than before. And with it, we end the pitiful plight of the resistance! Any mare or stallion that opposes us is sentenced to serve as this magnificent beast's broodmare as punishment. And thanks to the magically enhanced sperm swelling within its sack, even the most barren of broads will sire its offspring!"
Dainn's loyalties bellow their praises, fists, and weapons high in the air as the caribou hulk curdled in bestial rage. Dainn steps closer to the two alicorns before nodding his head to his soldiers, who roughly pushed both princesses forward to raise their ample backsides.
"Gnngrh! Thou won't get away with this!" Luna decreed, glaring healthy at the smug ruler of warmongers. "As long as we resist, thy shall never conquer Equestria!"
Her declaration was met with a harsh smack over her luscious ass cheek, earning a sharp gasp. "Oh, you stubborn little pony. Why don't you follow your sister's example and stay quiet? Accept the facts; This is Equestria now! And no one is coming to save you," Dainn said mockingly before turning to address his rousing regime.
"Perhaps a demonstration is in order! Let us celebrate the downfall of these feeble mares by defiling their beloved rulers. Guards, open the cage! Show them what happens to those that defy the caribou way!"
With a nod, his men took the front of the iron cage housing the massive brute, snorts of hot air flaring from its nostrils while it's blank eyes stared over the rumps of Luna and Celestia, it's cock throbbing in anticipation.
"Spike, this is bad!" Smolder whispered, looking towards her general with distraught.
"Yeah, we can't just sit here!" Rainbow Dash urged. "Celestia and Luna are goners if we don't act now!"
"There's no other choice," Spike snarled bitterly before unfurling his mighty wings. The aura of Heracles shimmering over his scales and pupils. "We attack NOW!"
Bellowing a thunderous roar, Spike took the skies as the rebels appeared out from the crowd, joining their general's war cry. Caribou guards couldn't react fast enough before Pinkie slammed her hoof down. The forces of the resistance powered through the caribou dominion as steel clashed with steel. And for all the boasting they proclaimed, male onlookers hide behind their stronger oppressors while cradling their mare.
Smolder took Rainbow by the arms as they dived into the fray, the former pegasus swiftly kicking a brute's head before making a solid landing. The orange dragoness joined her female troops in holding back the enraged crowd of mare haters. Some troops managed to take out a few guards on the floats and free the performers from their cuffs.
The cyan mare jumped and swept her hooves across the caribou forces, a flurry of punches and kicks to knock down anyone who tried to apprehend her.
"I-It's Rainbow Dash! She's come to save us!" One mare boldly declared.
"Equestria can be saved!"
"SILENCE!" A caribou enforcer demanded. "Shut those bitches u-ugghnah!" Another burly idiot brought down by the claws of Smolder, placing her foot over his head to level herself.
"The caribou's reign comes to an end! Rise! Fight for your freedom!" She howled, her fellow troops yelling as they fought valiantly against the barbaric soldiers.
"Up in the sky!"
"H-Hey, LOOK OUT!!"
A flash of yellow caused the clouds to part as Spike hurled his body towards the parade of floats, causing the onlookers to flee for covers. Upon impact, the abandoned floats burst into splinters and pieces as the drake rushed into the heat of battle, swiping his large claws and tail at the oppressors, cutting into their armor and flesh while roaring in rage.
"Mnnghm~! S-Spike!" Twilight obliviously called for, eyes lidded and smile wide while reaching out to her former apprentice. Dainn, having calmly watched this sudden attack, sneered at the lowly purple alicorn before smacking her head, a surprised cry calling out that alerted the dragon. His slit pupils dilated as his sharp teeth bared an irate grin.
"DAAAAAAAAAAINN!!!" He called out, flexing his wings to bat away the guards before rushing towards the large float.
"Stop him! Protect the king!" A commander declared as troops of caribou stood before the dragon's warpath, shields raised high to guard themselves against the curious swipes of talons. Puffing out his chest, Spike unleashed his wrath upon them in a breath of fire, immolating their defenses until molten steel poured down into the cold earth. Each caribou soldier screamed before the dragon launched his massive frame like a bowling ball, knocking every caribou side.
"Yeah! Go get him, Spike!" Rainbow Dash urged before stealing a weapon of one guard to bash the helmet on another, his body dropping to the stained ground. The wingless pegasus snarled while pressing the halberd's shaft against a long sword of another caribou bruiser.
But before the draconic general could act, bolts of lightning wrapped over his body, roaring in anguish. Dainn's blue eyes glowed with power, unleashing his arcane magic upon the dragon with one hand. The jolt of electricity penetrated through Spike's brilliant aura, Heracles' power fading. Yet he fought to power through the pain of pure energy ripping through his scales, smoke and flame pluming from his mouth. But his guards slashed at the dragon's legs, cutting him down to his knees. The caribou tyrant stopped channeling his magic, snapping his fingers to command his forces to subdue the electrocuted dragon.
"SPIKE!" Rainbow yelled, wrestling her way towards her fallen friend until a few guards secured her arms and punched her hard in the gut. The pegasus yowled before she, too, was forced down onto her knees. And it wasn't long until Smolder and the rest of their troops were subsided, much to the amusement and laughter of the male supremacists.
"Yeah, that's right! This is what you get!"
"Stupid whores! What did you think was gonna happen!?"
"Rip their clothes off! Let's fuck those bitches raw!"
As the crowd of stallions and caribou swarmed over the battered resistance, Rainbow Dash panted, teeth clutched to mask the agony in her body from how hard the caribou roughed her up. Her narrowed eyes looked up to Dainn, a smug smile clear on his snout as he grabbed a fistful of her mane to yank her head up.
"Did you honestly think I wouldn't expect a sneak attack? You stupid whore," he spat, smacking Rainbow's cheek with the back of his hand. "I knew that sniveling slit, Oona, would be behind this uprising. In a vain attempt to restore hope, she has doomed you instead. I knew today would be the perfect opportunity to stage a coup d'etat. So I decided to use your stubbornness to my advantage; To fully break your spirits! The power of Zeus flows through me like blood, unmatched by any magic. Not even your best warrior could withstand my divine wrath!" Dainn pointed to the smoldering form of Spike, who weakly struggled to get up.
"And with it, I will tear through your resistance once and for all!"
"N-No..!" Rainbow growled defiantly before receiving a kick to her stomach.
"Guards! Gather these weak-minded fools to my float. Let's make an example out of them to the rest of their cock serving race!"
"Yes, Indomitable one!"
Briskly, the unicorn general and the resistance leader secluded themselves within Oona's tent, Applejack guarding outside to ensure no one was to disturb them. Inside, Sombra freed his arm from her grip, irritated at the goat. "Enough delays, Ewe! Tell me what it is you want," he demanded. Unwavering, the dream faun took a step aside to reveal the stricken forms of Rarity and Fluttershy, dabbling madden mumbles and clutching onto the makeshift sheets. Sombra stared with bewilderment as Ewe placed her hands over the startled pegasus.
"Ye said ye cood feel thes one's sool fightin' within 'er broken state, correct?" Oona asked, to which Sombra nodded. "Ah believe ye hauld th' solution tae breakin' them it ay th' cariboo's clutches an' steer awa' frae their traumatic fate."
"What?! You think that I could...?," he paused, flabbergasted. "I... I've never had to undo psychological damage, let alone a maddening mantra. What if I make it worse? I could send them further on the brink of... I shouldn't! I can't..!" For the first time in his extended life of egoism and tyranny, Sombra felt a twinge of fear strike through his moral soul. Not fear for his own life, but another.
"Ye'll ne'er know unless ye try," Ewe urged. "Sombra, ye're th' only one wit knowledge an' th' proper power tae handle this sort o thing. Aye, there's a risk 'at yer efforts will worsen their sorry states, but Ah hink 'at by doin' this... by tryin' tae sae another's life, ye main unleash th' full might ay yer arcane magic. Was it nae ye who said darkness wasn't inherently evil?"
"I was... But not everypony chooses to believe that!"
"Weel 'en," Ewe took a seat between the two beds, offering a challenging grin. "Ya'll jist hav tae prove them wrang, won't ye?"
The dark stallion remained unsettled with this predicament before him. Rarity eyed him, trying to beckon him closer by pushing up her luscious chest while giggling without care. Fluttershy remained coiled in a fetal position, continually shivering. Despite his protest and uncertainty in being of any help to them, he knew that he couldn't leave them in this.
'At least, should I fail, they won't have to suffer long,' he concluded, resigning himself to the yellow pegasus' bed and inhaling deeply. Closing his eyes, Sombra concentrated on the vast black ickiness swelling within Fluttershy. Once he had a firm hold of her presence, his conscious slipped away from the waking world into the lascivious energy fuming from the pegasus. His enter body shuddered, mindfully gazing into a sea of darkness. Sombra's mind was assaulted with whispers and lecherous phrases, chanting incoherently,
'Obey cock! Serve Cock. Live cock!'
'Stupid, fucking whore! Shut up and suck dick!'
'Male supremacy! Caribou rule! Hail King Dainn!'
Sombra clutched at his chest, the urge to vomit rising within his throat. The wailing went on and on; he could feel his soul drown under the oppression. Still, Sombra kept searching deeper, the world around him growing colder. Until finally...
'I've found her!'
Dimly glowing was the nude form of Fluttershy, her whimpering and sobs echoing through this phantasmagorial plain. The darkness around her formed simple shapes of phalluses to rub and smack her with, the caribou's mantra screamed at her.
'You love dick! That's all you're good for!'
'Be a good little slut and choke on cock!'
'Open your legs and take our children!'
'No, please!' The trembling Pegasus pleaded, a neverending struggle to pull out of the inky bodies pulling her under. 'G-Go away! Leave me alone! I..!'
'Fluttershy! ' Sombra called to her internally. 'Fluttershy!' Yet each time he reached further, the frightened soul pulled farther away. The walls of oppression prevented any sound from reaching her, the caribou's magic overwhelming to both the dark stallion and trapped mare. The voices only grew worse.
'C'mon, fuck her already!'
'Be a stud and fuck that bitch up!'
'Make her worship your cock like the king that you are!'
"No, I'm not a..! Shut up! Get out of my head!" he growled, clutching over his temples to try and silence and bombarding profanity. Ewe quickly rose to comfort him, tightly gripping his shoulders. "Dinnae falter, Sombra," she encouraged. "Don't lit their words sway ye! Keep fightin'!"
Letting the goat's words guide him, he pushed through the senseless commands and pressure to submit. Vigorously, Sombra dug deeper into the imprisoned mind of the pegasus, drawing closer as the compelling voices grew more assertive.
And then something resounds within Sombra, making him shudder. An emotion faintly surfacing from Fluttershy's being. A familiar feeling Sombra recognized all too well.
Loathing.
Pure, unadulterated hatred.
And the dark unicorn understood how to free this tormented pegasus from her stupor. A way only he could know-how.
'Fluttershy! ' Sombra spoke again, directly to the part of that held disdained. And this time, Fluttershy responded. 'What was that? W-Whose there?'
'Heed my voice,' Sombra instructed. 'Embrace the conflict within your heart. Us it, and turn that fear against them. Make them pay for what they've done!'
'N-No, I can't! I'm too weak,' she whined. 'I-I could do nothing to stop them... I can't even stand up to these horrible voices! I-I should just--'
'Do not submit!' he bellowed, whips of dark energy glowing around his form. Upon seeing the flow of magic, 'Are you going to let them get away with discriminating you and your friends? Are you content with being their puppet!?'
'N-No... No..! No!' The hatred began to show itself from Fluttershy's body, wrapping over her limbs like cloth. Her clutched expression tightened, trembling violently at the new wave of power flowing out. Sombra pushed her onward, the shadows bending and warping into a more intense red hue, the aura glowing as bright as the anger they shared.
'Then show them who is stronger! Make them fear you! Hate you! Just as much as you hate them! Show them, Fluttershy! Show me!' Sombra urged, allowing his own emotions to overflow. The whimpering of the pegasus turned to strained groans, teeth clenched together as her body jerked up, unleashing her fury with a loud cry;
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoo!!!" The shadows she cast began to rise with her, manifesting her shape and figure, causing the goat to jump back in alarm. Her honey eyes gazed widely as the shadowy doppelganger continued Flutter's elated screams and growls. Oona then turned to Sombra, standing tall as his archaic magic hazed around him like Tartarus's flames. No longer was his aura dark and violet, but an ominous blood-red, significantly shown in the glow of his eyes.
Fluttershy laid her body back, panting heavily while looking over her surroundings before yelping over the sight of her shadow looming over her menacingly. "Yaaaah! W-What is that thing?! Where am I?!" She frantically demanded, clutching the sheets for comfort before a hand took her shoulders.
"Gabh air do shocair," Lady Ewe, pulling Flutter's face to hears, a slight smile on her snout. "Ye're safe now. We thooght we tint ye due tae aw th' abuse ye suffered frae th' cariboo's corruption. But, thankfully, he saved ye fr'm a grim fate," She pointed the pegasus towards Sombra, much to her bewilderment.
"S-Sombra?!"
At the sound of her voice, Sombra broke free of his trance, looking to his palms at the dark aura unconfined from his form. His crimson eyes turned to the pegasus and goat, and then resting on the dark silhouette attached to her shadow.
"I don't believe it... I create this?"
"Yes!" Oona confirmed with astonishment. "Ye awakened th' anguish an' anger within Fluttershy's sool an' conjured it intae a shade, an incorporeal bein' ay darkness 'at has lang existed within each o us. Sombra, thes means yer Onoma... yer archaic signature... is Hades!"
"Hades..." The dark stallion stared at the phantom-like being in disbelief. Within his vessel was a power to summon forth a ponies' inner turmoil and shape into a servent? The shade lowered down and bowed its head. His muzzle cracked a genuine smile, a small chuckle of rare happiness slipping past his lips. His focus turned to the quivering Rarity, channeling his newfound power through her.
"I-I don't understand; I thought Sombra was dead!" Fluttershy stammered at the kind-looking shepherd. "Why is he... helping us?!"
"It's a lang story, mah friend," Oona giggled. "But know that th' stallion befur ye is far frae th' tyrant 'at once sooght tae claim aw 'at he saw. This Sombra... will be th' catalyst 'at ends thes dreadful era ay Equestria!"
Fluttershy remained in disbelief, looking towards her friend, who suddenly shot up from the bed with a harrowing scream. After a moment of silence, Rarity woke in a panic, clutching at her ruined mane and stained fur, her sunken eyes looking anxiously around herself before spotting Fluttershy before tears resume to leak down her face.
"F-Fluttershy?! Oh, thank heaven... You're okay!!" the pale unicorn bawled, rushing to hug the pegasus tightly, shoulder hunching with each sob. Flutters returned the embrace, openly crying alongside her. "We're okay, now... I think we're finally safe!" she exclaimed softly.
"Not yet," Sombra disagreed, looking over the newly manifested shade of Rarity, joining Flutter's to loom by his side. "No one is safe while Dainn maintains control over Equestria. Hopefully, our allies have--"
"Lady Ewe! General Sombra!" Came the voice of Applejack outside, flinging the tent capes open. She was about to make her statement before her eyes widened at the sight of Rarity and Flutters, huddling together under the covers, free from their catatonic state. "M-Mah stars, ya... Y'all are alright?! How'd ya..!?"
"Turns out your friends aren't as bright and colorful as they seem," Sombra answered in summary, dispatching the shadowy figures as they phased into the ground. "Now, what is it?"
"A scout came back! General Spike, Rainbow, and da rest of them got captured. The parade was a trap!"
"What!?"
"A trap?" exclaimed both mares in their beds. Ewe rose, a look of horror on her face. Applejack nodded, her face scrunched up. "Accordin' to reports, Dainn planned public defilement of da princesses to draw out the rebels. He was prepared for our coup d'etat..."
"Sweet lucid dreams," Oona murmured.
"Dainn... that bastard!" Sombra growled, fist clutched with fury. To think that the caribou king could convey a scheme so clever. He sorely underestimated what the caribou were capable of. But now... Sombra held up his fist, a flourish of dark power emanating over his hand. His steely gaze turned to the dream faun. "Gather the rest of our forces. We're moving out! Now!"
"Sombra, wait! Ye just discovered yer trait! Ye need mair time to-"
"We don't have time!" The dark stallion argued, his gray haze steaming out the corners of his eyes. "I refuse to stand by while my comrades are out there, risking their lives to bring this nightmare to an end! Lady Ewe, we must act before we suffer more casualties."
Lady Ewe was taken aback by the look in his eyes. Behind that wrath was the determination to succeed, no matter the cost it might have on him. A look only shared by another close to her life. Resigned, she nodded her head. "Huir uv a weel. Go, Sombra. Ah will remain haur tae ensure hope remains high amongst th' resistance. But promise me this; promise me ye will return victorioos."
And, without a shred of arrogance or misplaced confidence that the former tyrant was prone to spewing, Sombra nodded his head and said, "... I will!" With that, he left the tent to address the concern and panicked faces, looking to their commanding general for orders. But within each of these fearsome mares were small hints of swelling anger, repulsed by the news their allies were in danger.
"Soldiers! Gather all our resources and come to me! We leave for Ponyville at once!"
"B-But sir! There's no way we'll make it there in time!"
A confident scowl spreads the dark general's features, the hellish power of Hades glowing from his eyes.
"I know of one way."
Rainbow Dash grunted, the caribou commander shoving her beaten body into the wooden float. The pegasus yelled profusely, thrashing about in the chains coiled around her as the entirety of Ponyville gathered to watch. She looked over to where Smolder and Pinkie Pie were held, growling at the guard touching and groping through her armor. Some soldiers went far to rip their troops clean in their molestations, their futile pleas ignored in favor of humiliating them.
Rainbow looked over to Spike, his defeated body clad heavily in chains. And any attempt he made to rise was met with a swordsman jabbing his blade into his body, earning a howl of pain. Her gaze looked over to the many mares in the audience, whimpering and sobbing lightly while their owner's berated and raped them. The many lives she failed.
"Is it finally sinking in yet, harlot?" Dainn's condescending voice asked, his leer met with the pegasus' deathly glare. "Has this miserable attempt at regicide opened your eyes? Your life before has long since ended! A mare's purpose is to bear children and obey their superiors; nothing more or less. Come to your sense, you stubborn whore. You lost!"
The cyan mare yelled as Dainn's hoof pressed over her cheek, rubbing his victory directly into her face. The caribou king bent down to one knee, a cruel smirk on his snout. "It's not too late to admit your faults. I can spare you from the crimes that await you, young mare." He removed his hoof off her head and unbuckled his leather trousers before presenting the aggressive pegasus with his hardening cock. "Accept my rule by suckling my cock, and I will pardon your crimes~."
Rainbow's cerise pupils dilated at the repulsive sight of slimy noodle pulsating before her nose. With pained breaths, she spat at his member while keeping her glare fixated on him. "I'd rather die, you pompous fuck!" she seethed.
Snorting, he delivered another harsh kick to the pony's bruised face. "That can easily be arranged then. Guards, dispose of this slit!"
Rainbow growled as Dainn's men lifted her wriggling form. Yet despite the bleak predicament, she would fight against her oppressors valiantly. Sombra would come. And once he did, the wrath of Equestria would lay upon the caribou like wildfire.
Astonishingly, somepony's voice came forth to share this sentiment.
"We'll... not... give up..!"
Everypony's head turned to the direction of Celestia, who had been silent for the entirety of the parade. Dainn looked especially taken aback by his broken pet's refound voice. The princess of the sun rose her head, her pale magenta eyes glaring at the barbaric ruler with renewed spite.
"We will never give up," the pale alicorn spoke delicately. "I... I may have failed my subjects, allowed my home to fall into disarray, but they will succeed me. As long as hope exists, Equestria will forever be beyond your reach, Dainn!"
"Phah! Such empty words," Dainn scoffed, hiding his surprise under furrowed eyebrows. "You think you can threaten me? You, who kneels before my hooves like a groveling mule? And here I thought you finally learned your place. A shame I'll have to punish you once we head home-"
"THEN PUNISH ME!" Celestria cried out, causing the caribou to jump at the power in her voice. "Flay me! Defile me! Behead me if it fulfills your puny ego! But even in death, I will defy you. They will forever defy you!"
"She... She's right!" A mare spoke out, which caused a chain effect of murders to erupt from the crowd, defiantly growing louder.
"We will never accept you as our king!"
"We will be free! The caribou's rule means nothing!"
"Equestria will rise!"
A small smirk spread Rainbow's face as more mares, and even stallions, rejecting the caribou's rule. Even as guards snarled at the crowd, threatening to butcher them where they stand, they continued to speak against the male chauvinists.
Whatever composure Dainn maintained quickly faltered as he violently yanked Celestia by the nub of her horn, teeth clenched with rising fury. "SILENCE, WHORE!"
"Thou shall not win, villain," Luna added into the commotion, smirking triumphantly. "Thou may take our bodies and treat us like dirt, but thou will not have our souls! This is our land! And the likes of thee will never prevail!"
Dainn casts his glare between the two alicorn sisters, unable to hold back the swelling rage brewing in his chest. The nerve of these bitches to speak up at him, to spark rebellion within these miserable. To continue to reject him as their rightful king! Electricity sparks in his fists as he placed his palms over each mare's face, his eyes illuminating with energy.
"YOU INSUFFERABLE SLUTS! I'LL TEACH YOU TO TALK BACK TO ME!" He declared, surging his power forth from his grip, lightning wrapping over Celestia and Luna's face as each screamed in muffled agony. "I AM THE KING! I AM EQUESTRIA! AND I'LL SNUFF OUT ALL HOPE FROM YOU AND YOUR PATHETIC RACE!" The crowd was stunned to silence, each pony watching in terror as pure bolts of arcane magic zapped through the alicorn's bodies. Even the king's own men stared in disbelief that he would go that far.
Rainbow Dash had to close her eyes with how intense the flashes of light were. But as the crackling of lightning stopped, her eyes opened to a horrific sight. Both alicorn's slumped forward, their faces charred and flesh pulverized. Their eyes glazed lifelessly over. An outcry of panic broke out, ponies trying to push out from each other until the caribou guards shoved the butts of their weapons to knock out any fleeing prisoners. Spike roared, his Onoma shimmering, enraged at the death of his aunties. Yet the weapons and chains holding him down subdue any attempt to burst free.
Dainn stood over the singed corpses of the former princesses, panting heavily. His eyes wide with rage before looking over to the pegasus. He grabbed her by the throat with a grunt, choking her as he lifts her restrained body. All she could do was wriggle uselessly in the king's grasp.
"Look at what you've made me do!" Dainn spat. "Those were my trophies, you tart! Because of you, my celebration is entirely ruined! Do you feel proud, knowing that your wretched kind will suffer dearly for the grievance? I should have your head... but I think a more suitable punishment is in order. Guards! Free the caribou hulk! Let it ravage this bitch into a proper broodmare."
"N-NOO!!" She yelled, the caribou tyrant dropping her, ascending back to his seat as the guardsmen clasped over the lock keeping the mutant beast imprisoned. "Let this be a warning to all who dare oppose me! THIS shall be your fate!"
Once the lock was uncoupled, the caribou hulk broke out of the cage, snarling madly before setting its sights on the iron-bound pegasus. Frantically, she tried with all her might to break out before the lumbering giant grabbed her with one meaty hand. Rainbow stared dreadfully into the lifeless, pupilless eyes. Everything the caribou demanded and stood for manifest into this abomination. Salivated from its unhinged jaw, it grabbed the bottom of her jumpsuit to tear it away, leaving her crotch and thighs exposed.
"No! Fuck, no! NONONONO!" She cried, her legs flailing about to kick the brute away, only for it to slam her into the float. The caribou hulk continued to bash her back into the wood until she could not keep kicking. Her legs dangled helplessly as the monster grabbed onto its heavy slab of meat before pressing its tip against her tiny slit. Rainbow's eyes went pinpoint over how wide and thick the monstrous cock was against her labia.
"N-No, stop! I can't take that! It'll kill me!" she pleaded, staring past the hulk's shoulders to the curious eyes of Dainn, who stared back remorselessly while having Twilight slurp and bob her head along his rigged length.
All the mare could do was close her eyes and brace for the unfathomable amount of pain of having this creature skewer her until something distracted the mutant from generating her core.
The sound of a war horn resonated throughout Ponyville, causing every pony and caribou to halt their actions, heads raised in the direction of that sound. King Dainn, too, rose his head, perplexed over the ominous bass echoing.
The earth began to tremble. Many lost their balance, tumbling down to their knees and rear ends. The guards clung onto their weapons to hold them steady. The violent quaking grew stronger until the main street of Ponyville cracked apart. Ponies scrambled to the sidelines, the wreckage of floats falling into the gaping abyss. Caribou guards, far too close to the edge, lost their footing and plummeted down screaming.
Slowly, a dark spire of black crystal emerged from the enormous fissure, rising out from the ground to tower over many of Dainn's floats. And standing on the tip, red cape and dark mane waving in the wind like a war flag, was Sombra. Rainbow Dash could hardly believe the amount of joy pounding in her heart upon seeing him, half smiling.
"Took you long enough," she murmured.
"Who is that?"
"Wait... isn't that Sombra?!"
"No, it can't be! I thought he died!?"
"It's a bad omen! We're doomed!"
Many mares and stallions commented to themselves, eyes bewildered over the sudden arrival of the Crystal Empire's former tyrant, conflicted with his appearance. Everypony nearly jumped as a hand popped out from the split earth, a resistance fighter pulling herself up. Then another climbed onto Ponyville's tattered tiles. And then another. And another, until the remaining rebels stood before the caribou guards on either side, swords, and bats raised to their head.
"C-Cunts! Get back!!" A commander barked, earning him a hard blow to his helmet that sent him hurtling into the crevice with a thud. Below was solid ground, where more resistance fighters waited to handle the ruthless barbarian.
The rebel mares subdue the troops molesting Smolder and her forces, giving them something to batter the caribou with as they stood on defense. Once Pinkie Pie was free, she swung her leg to bash a guard's balls into his taint, the bastard crying out before his legs inwardly collapsed.
Dainn could hardly believe his eyes. Today was supposed to be his crowning achievement. With the caribou hulk's release, he would finally end the resistance and make all these stupid mares submit to male reign. He even drew out a general and bested him in combat! But now, both his prized possession died martyrs. And now, this looming threat stared down at him, his icy eyes meeting the fiery crimson orbs of the dark stallion.
"And just who in Tartarus are you?!" Dainn demanded, tightly clutching Twilight's main, causing the mare distress. Sombra swishes his cape with a snort to reveal his arm, a smoky black aura emitting off his palm before answering the tyrant.
"I... am Equestria's reckoning."
The dark stallion dropped to the ground in one bound, placing his hand onto the crystalline pillar. Infusing a section with magic, he slowly pulled out a steel handle before tearing out a blade made entirely of obsidian. Not once did Sombra look away from the caribou's disdain expression before marching over.
"Gnnngh! Don't just stand there, you idiots!" Dainn bellowed. "STOP HIM!!"
At once, Dainn's armored soldiers rushed at the unicorn, blunt axes and swords aimed to cut him down, only to be met with a loud clang as Sombra's obsidian blade broke through the dulled metal, stabbing one guard in the chest. The wounded soldier lowed down, gasping in pain before Sombra kicked him off the strike at another attacker. All those weeks, fighting off brutes with weak weapons, paid off tremendously now that he forged a proper long sword.
One caribou commander secured Sombra from behind, hooking his arms under to apply a full nelson around the former king's head. Grunting, Sombra shifted out of a physical form to shroud the mistaken general in darkness so thick that no one could make out what he did to cause those terrifying screams. Instead, the shadow's pulled away to return the dark stallion, the caribou commander a shriveling mess as he collapsed to the frozen earth.
As their general made his move, the other rebels commenced in the brawl. Weapons and shields bashed with each other as the mares fought against the caribou oppressors. Smolder joined in the fray, repaying the lecherous brutes by spitting fire into their faces and swiping down their chests.
Rainbow Dash watched in awe as the battle pressed on until a sharp pain spiked between her legs. She howled as the caribou hulk resumed to try and spear its overgrown penis through her folds. "YAAAAAGHNAAAH!!"
The mare's cry alerted Sombra, once more phasing through the guards with umbral speed. Out from the shadowy wisps, the dark general slashed at the brute's arm, causing it to screech and released its captive. Sombra caught the shaking pegasus before firing a small blast of magic to melt the chains, freeing her limbs as Dash stumbled to balance herself.
"You alright?" He asked, holding her up by the shoulders.
"I was about to get impaled and become the baby factory of a mutant freak! Do you think I'm alright?!" she yelled with an annoyed glare.
Before Sombra could cheekily retort, the monstrous bulk of flesh and muscle drew the bickering ponies as dark blood oozed out from its severed hand. More caribou guardsmen swarmed around the pair, broad swords pointing towards them. Sombra and Rainbow leaned against each other's back, surveying the best tactic.
"You handle ugly. I'll keep the guards off our arses."
"You'd better," she teased before they bounced off each other, Sombra flying at the guards to slash his obsidian blade into the armored thugs. Rainbow would divert the hulking brute's attention, swiftly ducking and doing its blow it made in trying to hit her.
"Stop!! You'll destroy my float!" Dainn demanded, yet his creation was lost in blind desire to pummel the mare, slamming both fists overhead to cause the entire platform to collapse. The caribou soldiers wavered, allowing Sombra to knock aside his foes and bash their steel helmets with his crystal sword. Snarling, Dainn shoved the lavender pony away from him to jump ship, Twilight screaming out as Rainbow jumped to catch her friend, the two tumbling into the snow.
Once more, Sombra held another swordsman to a stalemate, both struggling to push the other off. Unlucky for the caribou, Sombra's horn emanated a bright red glow before unleashed a blast of raw magic into the poor fool's face, his screams melting along with his flesh before his body slumped down. Sombra's attention returned to the caribou hulk, charging at Rainbow Dash. Quickly, he summoned forth a wall of sharp stones to block the brute's path before concentrating another magical beam to finish off the creature.
To his surprise, the caribou hulk was resisting, snarling in agony while blocking his power in its remaining hand, flesh leisurely melting off its bones. Sombra persisted, swear rolling of his brow to maintain his flow of magic as the monster got closer to him. Fortunately, Rainbow Dash recovered to jump back into the fray and deliver a swift kick to the monster's hideous mug, staggering it to a knee. Ending his projectile, Sombra ran up to shove his black crystalline blade through the throat of the caribou hulk. In a dying gasp, the misogynistic monstrosity tried to reach for the dark stallion, only for it's head to lobe off its neck.
Sombra stepped away panting, fatigue starting to settle, his head ringing from how long he held up that energy beam. Turning around, he looked to his comrades to see how they faired. And to his relief, many of the caribou regimes struggled to hold back the rebel troops and soldiers. Smolder, and her entourage was busy trying to unshackle Spike and get the large dragon back up.
But their numbers remained small, as many of the onlookers were too afraid to join the fight. Slave mares and cowardly stallions, the ones who weren't abusive, clung to each other, yearning for their freedom. But Sombra knew that deep inside; they wanted to return the violence and heinousness the caribou projected onto them, especially when their beloved princess died at the hands of their cruel king.
"HnnghaaAAAAAGH!!" Sombra bellowed, wraps of electricity surging through his armor from behind. He turned his gaze towards Dainn, unleashing bolts of arcane energy through his fingertips, matching Sombra's fury. Unable to withstand the overwhelming pain, Sombra collapsed to his knees and arms.
"SOMBRA!" Rainbow yelled, rushing to aid her general before an injured caribou grabbed at her leg, keeping her from going any further. Upon seeing another warrior fall, Smolder strained her arms to lift Spike, their troops circled by more enforcers.
Satisfied, Dainn discharged his Onoma while directing his guards to stand over Sombra's smoking body. The fabric of his cape smoldered with burnt marks, Sombra's arms and face singed. The dark unicorn struggled to hold his body up while tilting his head at the bladed tips aimed at him. The caribou king sighed wearily before chuckling, leering at the crowd.
"Have you learned nothing? It doesn't matter what you do. You can fight all you want, and I'll still come out as the victor. We caribou are naturally stronger, superior, smarter! Did you honestly believe you had a chance against me?" The crackling tyrant looked over to the dark unicorn. "I'll admit this one surprised me. I wasn't expecting such a brilliant fighter to exist among you putrid ponies. A shame he chose to waste his strength because I could use such a stallion in my fold! But alas, another disappointment." He turned his back on his would-be foe and began to walk away. "I've had enough of this accursed day! Caribou, kill this mongrel and bring me his head. I'm heading home."
"Pathetic..!"
That word caused the caribou to stop in his tracks, turning to the fool that muttered it. Sombra rose his head, chuckling lowly. Dainn's brows furrowed once more.
"Care to repeat that, colt?"
"You're so pathetic," Sombra rebutted, louder. "Never have I met a more yellow-bellied lunatic, thinking he commands anything just because he decorated his horns like a hearth's warming tree."
"Bold words from a dead colt," the tyrant scoffed. "I'd be insulted if you weren't about to be mounted on my wall."
"It's funny... how much you think your followers look up and respect you," Sombra panted, his laughter wheezing. "When in actuality, they've come to fear you."
Dainn's confidence wavered, the unicorn's words getting under the caribou's skin as his scowl returned.
"Enough of this nonsense! Quit twiddling your thumbs and behead this fool! Now!!"
Yet the guards did nothing. Frozen in place while staring down into the ground, trembling in their armor. Dainn was about to decree another order when an intense pressure weighed over him. Gasping, his eyes widened as a blood-red aura lit over Sombra's body.
"I'll let you in on a secret, Dainn," Sombra said, his hands clutching into tight fists. "All the fear and hatred you've brought upon everypony doesn't end with mares and stallions. These caribou, your fellow brethren? They despise you! Loath what you've become!" Darkness emerged out of his knuckles, flowing into the shadows around him, archaic energy glowing from below the caribou's hooves.
"Hatred is all you've brought to Equestria! And in hatred, you and your forces will FALL!"
With a loud below, Sombra rose back to his hooves; eyes blazed in hellish light before the shadows of the caribou took form, blocking off Dainn's commanders from holding down the former tyrant. Each brute stammered back, startled by their doppelganger shoving them back with their own weapons. Dainn jumped, eyes widen in disbelief.
"What!?"
Sombra rose a fist to the sky, commanding the caribou shades to attack their counterpart, swiping their armor and shields with shadowy steel. The enforcers, too frightened with the manifestations of their disdain, were pushed further back until their shades sliced through to their arms, drawing blood and yelps of pain.
Rainbow Dash, the dragons, and the onlookers couldn't believe the sight before their eyes as Sombra looked back towards them. "Citizens of Ponyville! The time has come for you to fight back against the oppressors. Give them your hate. Your fear. Make them suffer for what they've done! Show them the might of Equestria and RISE UP!!" He pointed to the lifeless bodies of the alicorn sisters. "Are you going to let Dainn get away with this atrocity!? Will Celestia and Luna's deaths be in vain!?"
"No... No more! NO MORE!!" One mare sneered, the overwhelming emotions becoming too much to bear inside as she let out a harrowing yell. From behind, her shade materialized to strike at the stallion that tormented her for months on end, knocking him down cold. Soon, more and more ponies bought into Sombra's speech, letting their darkest emotions manifest into shadowy phantoms to fight back against their abusers.
"Oh yeah, let's get mad!" Rainbow grinned angrily, glaring down at the caribou as a shade of her own burst out from beneath her to tackle down the caribou soldier. Disarmed, she smacked his face with her hoof before leaping up to resume their fight. Shortly, the entire crowd spawned dark transparent copies of themselves that double their numbers. For once, ever since their arrival to Equestria, the Caribou's height and bulk meant nothing. They were the ones outnumbered.
Spike had to hand it to Sombra. The unicorn talked a big game and definitely had the power to back up his bark. The dragon unleashed a might roar with returning energy and led his troops to resume the attack, joining the ponies and shades in battering the barbaric soldiers into the ground.
"What's happening?!" One enforcer exclaimed, trying to shield off the weapons. "How did these bitches get so fucking strong?!"
"I-It's a trick! Don't buy into that crap!" A commander snarled, battering down one shadowy figure with a club. "They're just lowly bitches! We're the superior ones! We're--GAAAAAGH!" His speech was cut short as a caribou shade impaled him from the back and tossed his burly body into a squad of soldiers, sending them over the edge of the fissure.
"Even our own kind is attacking us!!"
"What do we do? WHAT DO WE DO!?"
"I didn't sign up for this!"
"Shut your mouths," A caribou captain shouted, struggling to keep the mares and rebels off him. "This is not how warriors act! Dainn chose us to carry out his rule of supremacy! Keep these hoes in line, for fuck sake!"
"But sir, there's so many of them!!"
"These ghost things are passing through our armor and shields!" One yelled, the arm of a shadowy stallion phasing through to jab a blade right through the caribou's neck. And as much as the captain wanted to refuse that ponies had gotten the better of them, the odds were stacked against them. There was no way they could win now with the dragon, mysterious unicorn, and these dark phantasmagorial beings.
"M-My liege! May I request a tactical retreat?" He called forth to King Dainn, only to be distraught to find that the caribou tyrant was no longer where he stood.
"D-Dainn?!"
Sombra followed the troubled look on the caribou's face, rushing forward to find the fleeing coward running over the hillside, far away from Ponyville.
"Damnit!" Rainbow growled. "He's on the run!"
Sombra's glare deepened as his form dissolved into his umbral essence, disappearing into the earth while uttering a leaving statement.
"He won't get far!"
"Huuhhf... Guugh, fuck!" Dainn cursed as he struggled to run through the deepening blanket of snow. He paused to catch his breath, panting hysterically. His heart pounded loudly in his chest, his thoughts rampant with disarray. How was this possible? How on earth did those meek, feeble ponies bring forth a warrior, who unleashed Tartarus to slaughter a full regime of his best soldiers?! it was inconceivable! But he managed to escape certain death. He fixed his glare at the distant village of Ponyville, a dark haze streaming through the sky like smoke.
"I'll make them pay for this transgression, those deceiving cunts!" the caribou king swore. "I'll head to the Crystal Empire, rally up more men, and return with a swift vengeance! Those bitches will regret the day they dare get the better of me!" Dainn, with retribution on the mind, marched on through the snow until the ground started to shake beneath him. He gasped, losing balance from the raptured as jagged crystal pillars erected from the ground, forming a cage to prevent him from going any further.
"What!? No!!"
"And where do you think you're going?"
The caribou rose, startled as the looming dark unicorn stood behind him, dark red energy wisping off his form, staring deathly at the shaking tyrant. The tip of his obsidian blade glowed in power, warping the cold air around him. Like the coward he was, Dainn shot himself at the jewel barricade, slamming his fists to futilely break free, sparks of electricity jolting from his fists.
"You have nowhere to run," Sombra growled. "Your regime has fallen, most of your troops are dead, and now you stand before me, trembling like a frightened animal trapped with its predator. It's over for you, Dainn. You've lost!"
The caribou king glared bitterly over at the stallion, his head twitch, brows furrowed with fury. "Never! I am not the weak one here, you are!" Dainn accused with a snarl. "You allowed those slits to mess with your head! Only a simp allows the likes of females to fight for them. But I refuse to surrender my rights as a buck to the likes of you stupid ponies! Equestria is MINE to command! You ALL will kneel and lick the ground I walk on!"
Lightning flowed out his arms, his eyes lighting up as energy crackled through his fingers, his body on end and unhinged. Sombra let out a hardy chuckle.
"What's so funny!?"
"Oh, nothing... You remind me of a younger version of myself; less impressive and more pussy whipped than he'd care to admit," Sombra commented, tightening his stance while gripping his blade with both hands. "You're a truly delusional fellow if you believe you can win."
"I've already won, wretched stallion! Once I return with your head, whatever hope they have will perish, and I will cement my reign as a grand conqueror, just like my ancestors. I am Dainn the Indomitable! I! AM! KING!"
Sombra sneered at his opponent as archaic energy erupted around him like fire, his eyes alit with crimson fury.
"Those who spout 'they are king' will never be true kings. And I refuse to lose to the likes of you!"
With tremendous force and a loud war cry, the two launched at each other. Dainn forged a spear with his archaic lighting to clash with Sombra's obsidian sword, striking with ardor as energy sparked upon each thrust and swing. The caribou king attacked like a hound with blood rage, yelling in exasperation upon failing to connect any real damage to the dark unicorn. Sombra grunted and growled, returning his foe's ferocity with relentless stabs overhead strikes, failing to penetrate through the electrical sharpness of Dainn's weapon. Strategy and cunning had long been thrown out of the window. Sombra and Dainn refused to give in until the other's head was decapitated. The two despots were locked in a duel to the death.
Crystal blade and thundering energy meet once more, a standstill as the to pushed against each other in a contest of strength, crimson eyes gazing hatefully into the electrical blue that mirrored his disdain. The struggle for an advantage end as Sombra pressed all of his weight to make Dainn bend down to his knees, starting to tower over the angry caribou.
"Grrraaangh!" he bellowed, pressing his might back against the dark unicorn, static sparking onto the ground as he prepared to channel his magic through his horns. But before he could strike, Sombra's own horn glowed in hot red before firing a beam into his sword. The weapon ignited with pure power, unleashing a massive blast of hot light to slide Dainn backward into the ground.
But the caribou king was unrelenting, surging his magic into a single large bolt, the contrasting energies interacting with one another. Sparks of blue and red flew everywhere as the rays of arcane magic pushed against each other, the users straining and aching to move ahead in the contest of power. Eventually, Dainn's trait began to overwhelm the fiery red laser, slowly pushing more and more energy back towards Sombra.
"It's futile!" Dainn declared through clenched teeth. "The power of Zeus is invincible! Not even your Onoma can measure to the sheer force of lighting!"
"Ggaangh... Perhaps not," panted Sombra, beads of sweat pouring off his brow as he concentrated on keeping his magic flowing. "But power alone will not spare you from the darkness that surrounds you!"
At the last second, Sombra ceased his magic to duck out of the surging bolt before sending a flow of magic into the snow. Just as Dainn discharged his power, the crystal pillars began to expand in size. Before the king could continue his attack, Sombra disappeared into the darkness as the cage enclosed over them. Not even the glow from his archaic aura could pierce through the pitch-black surroundings.
"What is this?! Show yourself, coward!" Dainn snarled, igniting more electrical currents from his fingers to lash out the moment his nemesis figure was spotted. But instead, a hand would grab onto his arm. And then, another pair of hands latched onto his leg. The caribou stammered, before discovering the crystal chasm, allowed more shades to emerge. The many shades of all the countless victims he defiled and tormented through his reign of Equestria.
"Gaagh! L-Let go of me, filthy swine!" He demanded, ignoring the harsh whispers and screams they echoed while blasting each that held him. But their numbers overwhelmed him, new pairs of hands replacing each shade he struck down until they clasped his throat. They clawed at him, tearing away his royal garb like he had the princesses. Leaving him bare and exposed to the cold like he had so many mares.
"N-No nononono! Don't touch me! Leave me alone!!" he pleaded as hands roughly clutched onto his genitals. His eyes widened, agony pulsing through his loins as he felt the tug and pull at his member, then fear exhilarating as another pair clutched over his leathery ballsack, squeezing tightly. The caribou king feebly squirmed, trying everything in his power to break free. "S-STOP! GAAGH! NO, PLEASE! DON'T!"
The shades stared mercilessly at the frightened coward before, in a steel grip, his balls burst under pressure before being town off his scrotum.
"GRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! AAAAAUGHAHAAAGH!" Dainn screamed with fury and horror, his form wriggling in anguish as blood splattered the snow-covered ground. But the worse had yet to come as another shade took hold of his limp dick, opened its mouth before biting into his foreskin, the caribou wrenching out in shock. And in a swift tug of its head, the shade pulled back to tear his penis off, completing the dismemberment of the once-proud king.
"NAAAAAAUGH! NOOOOO! MY BALLS! MY COOOOOCK!!!" Dainn bawled as his legs folded inward onto the ground.
"How does it feel to be stripped of your dignity?" Sombra's voice whispered insidiously before the dark stallion walked towards him. "Can you hear the outcry of fear you've inflicted? Do you feel the pain of all the souls you've raped and tarnished?! Embrace their agony, Dainn! And suffer as they have!!" With a mighty roar, the dark unicorn lifted the sniveling welp by his neck and smashed his face with his fists. Each blow he struck into the caribou was dedicated to all ponies and creatures who suffered at his hands.
The battered and bloodied king of the caribou leaned against the crystalline pillar, spewing hot liquid from his mouth while struggling to stand upright. But his weary eyes focused on the angry stallion, and small bolts of static wrapped around his form. Through heavy pants, he spat out,
"You... lowly, mongrel! To think, gaah..! A stupid unicorn could cause me so much pain. Because of you, my legacy is forever in shambles," He berated, eyes alit with arcane magic. "But If I must perish... THAN ALL OF EQUESTRIA WILL PERISH WITH ME!!"
Thunder roared from above before an enormous bolt of lightning struck the crystal cage, shattering the jewels to pieces, daylight burning the shades away. Sombra flinched as the weather grew rapid, a storm cloud brewing over the howling winds. Dainn ascended to the sky, leering down at Sombra while channeling his Onoma to its full prowess. Blood dripped down from his legs, the caribou shivering before firing a hand of electricity at the stallion. Without his blade to defend himself, Sombra collapsed onto his knees, yelling as the bolts wrapped and penetrated his flesh.
"My power is unlimited," the caribou king crackled. "Now die, wretched pony! Die knowing you and your kind will be eradicated! All will know my wrath! ALL WILL HAIL DAINN!!"
He rose his arm into the sky, a nexus swirling in the clouds as volts of nature flashed in the wintery sky. Sombra gazed into the furious snarl of the thunderous caribou, gathering all of his archaic energy into one enormous bolt of crackling lightning. Sombra willed himself to channel Hades' power, but he could not manifest a shade without a source of darkness. Unless...
"WITH THIS, I SMITE YOU DOWN, STALLION! YOU AND AL--Aaaaaagahcaagh!? WHAT!?"
Before the furious Stormbringer could finish his declaration of his opponent's demise, he felt weight pulling down. A hand once more clasped around his throat and cut off his oxygen. The archaic magic vaporized from his wide eyes as he turned back to stare at another shade. His shade.
"W-What!? No! NOO!!"
"As I said before," Sombra groaned, steam hazing from his singed flesh, a patch of his fur burnt off his arms and face. His obsidian blade returned to his hand as he stared down at the struggling caribou with utter animosity. "This battle was mine to win, given how reckless and vile you are. The darkness in your soul is immeasurable. It's only natural that it would be your undoing."
"NOOOUGH! N-Not like this!!" Dainn spat, being brought onto his knees once more as his shade held his head in a vice lock. The trembling coward stared up into Sombra. And even though his spirit fought, the stallion detected resignment in those icy blue eyes. Deep down, the caribou knew; there was no escaping his death.
"E-Equestria... Gnnaagh! Has no future without me!!" He insisted through choked words, loathing the stallion with every last breath. Normally, Sombra would show respect to a noble warrior who would fight until the end. But Dainn was nothing but a stubborn fool who refused to admit defeat.
"No..." Sombra sighed, holding his blade to the side as it pulled with archaic energy, igniting the light in his eyes. "... There is no future with you!!"
Muster the last of his strength into one final cry, Sombra lunged at the battered caribou before piercing the stone edge through his chest. A sticking sound of flesh tearing and blood spilling was backup by the Dainn's dying yowl, his shade vanishing with a harrowing scream. More of the buck's blood oozed from his mouth, staining the blade. His eyes nearly rolled over, staring unblinkingly at Sombra before the stallion placed his heel into the handle to push the sword further through the caribou. Weak, desperate breaths for life left his foul mouth, the wretched tyrant unable to do anything but watch his enemy grab onto his antlers and start pulling his head painfully up. Dainn wept pathetically while staring up into the ruthless visage of Sombra, the last thing he saw before...
SCLUNCH!
The battle in Ponyville was drawing to a close. With their king having gone awol, the caribou were left to fend off against the resistance themselves. Even with the mysterious shades disappearing, the prolonged wrath from the mares they violated and tortured was unwavering. And with the dragon general and lieutenants bringing down the regime's top commanders and captain, defeat was inevitable for the stubborn race of warriors.
All the soldiers, battered, bruised, clips of fur ripped and armor dented, had their backs cornered. Defiantly, they held their weapons as the crowd of angry ponies closed them in. In turn, Rainbow Dash rose her dulled blade at neck point, glaring daggers into each caribou brawler. "Checkmate," she declared.
"No... This is impossible!"
"We couldn't have lost!"
"We own you cunts!!"
"This isn't over," a commander spat. "There's still plenty of us around Equestria to put you ungrateful sluts back in line. A-As we speak, our king has left to call for back up! And he will return with a great army!"
"Y-yeah! Canterlot is still under our command!"
"Just you whores wait! When King Dainn comes back, he'll..."
But all arguments died down as a figure marched forth from the haze. Everypony and caribou turned head as Sombra emerged, lumbering with exhaustion. The unicorn cast a wary glare over to the oppressors before lifting something in the air for all to see. Everyone gasped, the caribou's expression pale in comparison.
In the stallion's grasp was the severed head of Dainn, blood dripping out his throat, his neck bone dangling. Lifeless eyes glazed over, his tongue flopped to one side of his snout. The look of pure horror clear on his face. The sight was too much to handle as many caribou's bellowed in alarm. Sombra unceremoniously dropped the tyrant's head to the ground, approaching the quivering cowards to respond in a calm, worn out demeanor.
"Your king is dead. Stand down, or join his fate."
Fear in their eyes over the menacing crimson gaze of the once cruel tyrant, each buck felt to their knees and lowered their heads to the ground, surrendering. Soon, all weapons fell to the ground as each mare and stallion shakingly collapsed, tears of joy streaming from their eyes.
"It's over... It's finally over," one mint-green mare sobbed, clutching her friend tightly, comforting each other. Stallions, who were forced to inflict grueling pain to their spouses and loved ones, hesitantly pulled a mare into his arms, brushing her messy mane. "We can go home now... we don't have to hide!"
"No! NOOOOOOOOOOooo!! YOU TRAITORS!!" One voice cried out. Each head turned to Twilight, the former princess of friendship, now reduced to a blubbery mess while spitting spite at the subjects who trusted her. "How could you do this to our masters!? You should be groveling at their hooves, begging for mercy! And YOU!" She pointed at Sombra. "You've ruined everything!! How dare you come back and kill our glorious king!? Kill him!! KILL HIIIIIIIIM!!Baugh!"
Everypony stares at the deranged alicorn with pity as Spike gently held up the wriggling mare, tightly holding her despite how much she snarled demanded him to drop her, pounding her fists into his shoulders. "Shhhhh, It's okay, Twilight. I got you... We're gonna help you, I promise," he assured, carrying Twilight away to calm her down. Smolder took the initiative to step onto the remains of Dainn's float, drawing everyone's attention to her. "Citizens of Ponyville... Let this day mark the beginning of our liberation! With Dainn's downfall, the rest of the caribou will follow. Mares and Stallions... This is our victory!"
At the raise of her fist, everypony exploded in an uproar of jubilation. A wave of elation flooded the entire village as Pinkie Pie grabbed as many mares into a hug and leaped with jow. Rainbow Dash did all she could to fight back the proud tears leaking down her face. Her head perked over to Sombra, who placed his hand over the crystal pillar that brought him here, lowering it back into the ground. His head turned to the wingless pegasus and shared in her smile of triumphant. Then suddenly, she rushed over to urge Sombra towards the crowd, raising his own fist in the air. While innately, everypony looked nervously at the dark stallion, imposing stature not lost from the record books. But that dread melted into joy as they all began to chant his name, recognizing Sombra for his actions that lead to their freedom.
The stallion himself was at a loss for words. He stood before a crowd of ponies that celebrated him as a hero. Sombra was out of touch with elation, having expected a fearful and vile monster. There was no doubt they didn't see him that differently. But perhaps the relief of no longer being bound to caribou chains overshadow his horrible reputation. So for the moment, Sombra quietly embraced this wave of positivity, shutting his eyes, allowing a broad smile to appear on his snout.
'So this is what heroism feels like,' he said internally. 'I must admit... It feels good.'
"You're leaving?!"
While resistance members and Spike's troops remain in Ponyville to cauterized the damage, Sombra, Rainbow Dash, and others returned to camp, sharing the news of Equestria's victory and Dainn's demise. But once the jubilee settled down, Sombra went into deep thoughts about everything he had experienced. What did he learn from this? Had he truly changed for the better? Was he to be a hero that ponies wanted.
The answer, he decided, lead to him proclaiming this statement to Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Lady Ewe, who reacted distraughtly.
"I have too," he insisted uneasily.
"But why?" The orange mare asked. "Isn't this what ye've wanted? The folks of Ponyville will surely open up to ya after savin' their lives."
"I did what needed to be done," Sombra rebutted, turning away. "I may have saved a few mares and stallions from a life of imprisonment. But that won't make up for all the pain and death I brought before me. One good deed does not define me in any better light. Besides, it's only one village. There are many places still under the caribou's influence."
"Aye," Ewe nodded, understanding. "Ah can sense the sins of the past weigh heavily on ye, Sombra. But they can be forgiven, as long as ye can furgive yerself. Ye've taken the first steps towards redemption, friend."
"Even so," He looked over to his palm, a shimmer of archaic aura glowing over it. "The power to manifest ponies worse emotions and use it against them is too deadly. If I wasn't careful... If I were still like Dainn..."
"But you're not. And you didn't," Rainbow reminded him, tenderly rubbing his shoulder. "For all I care, the Sombra of old stayed dead. This Sombra... You used a gift only you could give that rescued folks from the caribou's clutches."
Sombra gazed back to his lieutenant, unable to tell her how much her words meant to him. After so much hate and accusations of him only sought Equestria for him, Sombra was finally seen by somepony admirable. Though the mention of his name made his chest swell up, a deep sigh leaving his lips.
"Sombra... Is the name of an evil overlord that enslaved innocent ponies for his own gain," the dark stallion lamented. "Let that name be buried, and remained attributed to tyranny. I want a name more meaningful to ponies... Something that'll inspire strength and respect in the hearts of those who hear it."
Ewe tilted her head curiously. "An' whit name 'ave ye've chosen?"
He looked back to the ponies, gently smiling as his crimson eyes burned brightly. "... Ambros. I originally used it to hide my existence. But I've found myself grown fond of it. Let that be the name I use to bring forth a stronger Equestria with."
Both mares turned to one another before nodding at his choice. Rainbow gave the stallion a knowing smirk. "So then, Ambros? Where will you go?"
He chuckled lightly before turning his head towards the horizon; the skies slowly darkening as the hidden sun peeked out from the clouds. "By now, Word will have gotten out that King Dainn was slain. I suspect the other caribou factions will retaliate. I want to study and get a further grasp of arcane magic so that I may use it to liberate the Crystal Empire."
"The Crystal Empire? Why there?" Applejack asked.
"If memory serves me correct, Shining Armor and Princess Cadance remain loyal to the caribou's way of life. I have a score to settle with those two," he admitted bitterly. "But there's a place I want to visit. There's a secret hidden there that I think will be crucial in Equestria's liberty."
"Well, let me come with you! There's no reason you have to go alone..."
"You are needed here, Rainbow Dash. With the princesses gone, that only leaves your friend to take command of Canterlot."
"But how can we--"
"Let him go, Rainbow," Lady Ewe cuts in, a warm smile on her muzzle. "This is a journey only he can take. Once we've healed Twilight's mind, we'll have more than enough help to secure Canterlot. And from there on, the rest of Equestria will rally together to end the caribou's reign."
Rainbow remained conflicted, knowing that it was for the better that the dark unicorn travels on his own path. It was still hard to believe she had grown attached to him. With hesitation, she secured her arms around Sombra for a tight hug, one he slowly returned.
"When this is all over... you better come back and visit me, asshole," She insisted, pulling away with a bitter smile. "If you don't, I'll find you and kick your ass! You hear me?"
He let out a loud chuckle before shaking his head. "Wouldn't have it any other way... but we will meet again, my friend. I promise."
With one more squeeze, Rainbow released the unicorn before Pinkie bounced over to bring him a nap sack. In it was food and water that should last him a week. As Sombra straps it over his shoulder, the pink mare quickly kissed his cheek, flustering the dark stallion. Applejack approached to offer her hand as the two shook.
"Safe travels, partna," she encouraged with a bold grin.
He nodded before lastly addressing Oona Ewe. The doe placed his hand into hers, her warm honey-colored eyes glowing under his gaze. "Good luck on your journey, Ambros. May th' spirits guide ye."
"Good luck to you too. And thank you for bringing hope back to me," he said in gratitude, placing a gentle kiss on her knuckles. The faun blushed before yanking her hands away, giggle nervously.
With a broad smile, Sombra marched through the camp before exiting out from the gates. Turning back one last time, he waved goodbye to the friends and comrades he made. As the gates closed, the dark unicorn began his long walk through the forest, much as he did nearly a month ago. It amazed him how much time had passed since then. How much he had changed. No longer was he the same power-hungry villain that yearned for vengeance. Now, he came to the aid of ponies he once prosecuted as an unlikely hero. And thanks to the mystic arts of arcane magic, new possibilities opened to him.
Though it troubled him that some questions remained unanswered. He never did figure out what that bell was in his dreams. Nor whose voice beckoned him from the brink of death. How long until he found the one responsible for his second chance in life?
Sombra paused, turned his head around him. He could swear he was being watched. And though he couldn't see it, he felt another presence close by. But outside of the sound of cold wind brushing through the bare trees, no other sound was heard. Skeptical, he pulled out an apple from his given nap sack and took a bite before resuming his path. He wasn't going to get to the Crystal Empire quicker like this.
'I will find the truth... in time' He concluded, looking up to the grey skies as snowflakes fell to the soft blanket covering the earth. Readjusting his back, the dark unicorn carried on his way. It would be dark soon. He would need to gather up twigs and branches for a fire. After the well-fought battle today, he figured he deserved some rest. Tomorrow, Sombra would venture back to Ponyville for directions and more supplies. After all, the journey was far more important than the destination itself. Sombra only hoped that whatever his path was, it would lead him to somewhere warm and safe.
Someplace where the throes of winter would never follow him. |
Speak From the Heart | pre | After what felt like an eternity of cuddling imprisonment, you felt Fluttershy stir. Her wings stretched out above her slowly as she yawned again, before folding neatly to her back once more. Outside, the sky was turning bright shades of red and orange, and the faintest rays of sunshine filled the room with light. You shut your eyes and kept your breath almost silent as Fluttershy awoke, her breath catching suddenly in her chest.
"Anon...?" she whispered. Ten seconds passed, then twenty, then thirty. You felt her head turn away from her shoulder, and you opened one eye to look down at her. She was watching the sunrise through the window, still wrapped around your arm. On closer inspection, you noticed a smile and blush both growing on her face.
"D-did you sleep well?" she asked, still looking outside. "I hope I didn't keep you up, Angel's told me that I talk in my sleep sometimes." You stiffened in surprise; despite your best efforts, she had been completely aware that you were awake.
"You breathe differently when you sleep, you know. All animals do. I noticed when Applejack brought you home last night. You-" Fluttershy was interrupted by a series of raps on the bedroom door, and hastily lifted herself off of your arm to answer it. You sat up to see Angel in the doorway, arms crossed and foot tapping impatiently.
"Oh, right. It's time for your breakfast," she acknowledged, and turned back to you. "Normally we eat early, before you get up, but since you're awake now, you're welcome to come down and join us, if you'd like."
You obliged, swinging your legs off of the bed and standing in a single, quick motion. All three of you headed down the stairs into the kitchen, and you pulled out one of the dining room chairs to watch Fluttershy prepare Angel's breakfast. He took his bowl of carrot slices and lettuce from her carefully, and strode haughtily to the living room, giving you a sideways glance as he left the room. Fluttershy craned her neck to watch him as he plopped down into his basket to eat, humming thoughtfully.
"I wonder what's gotten into Angel lately. He's been acting strangely ever since you arrived, normally he eats with me in here," she mused. You shook your head, unsure as well. You hadn't paid much attention to Angel for the past few days, save for the couple times you found him curled up beside you or on top of you when you woke up on the couch. You'd made a few attempts to pet him or interact with him then, but he always scurried off to find Fluttershy or to take refuge upstairs. Initially, you came to the conclusion that Angel wasn't fond of you, given his absence whenever you were spending time with Fluttershy. The few moments when you and the yellow pegasus were apart, however, he was usually napping or otherwise entertaining himself wherever you happened to be, sometimes following you. You had a sneaking suspicion that, perhaps, he was just getting to know you on his terms. With how standoffish he was around Fluttershy, maybe he was just trying to save face.
"By the way, Anon, Applejack left a gift for you last night, after bringing you here. She said she made it herself."
You turned your attention to Fluttershy, who was carefully pulling a metal pie tin out of the fridge. She set on the table and fetched a couple plates and silverware for both of you. You peeled back the foil on top of the pan to reveal a golden-brown apple pie with filling just slightly oozing out of holes in the top. The heavenly smell of cinnamon, nutmeg, and apples washed over you as Fluttershy carefully cut out a slice for herself. She slid the second plate to you along with the serving knife, and sat down beside you.
"Normally, I wouldn't eat sweets first thing in the morning, but I don't have time to cook," she remarked before taking a quick bite. "Yesterday, I checked in on a pregnant doe that I've been keeping an eye on for several months, and I think she'll go into labor soon, so I'm going to leave and check on her again to make sure she's okay." You nodded your head while savoring your breakfast. Fluttershy ate her small piece remarkably fast, and took her dish to the sink before you had finished even half of your slice.
"I won't be gone long, you'll be okay here with Angel, right?" she asked, reaching for a small bag hanging from the wall by the doorway. You gave her a thumbs-up and a confident grunt. Satisfied, she slid the bag strap around her neck and trotted over to Angel. You didn't quite catch what she said, but her tone was as motherly as ever, prompting Angel to reluctantly nod his head and wave her off. She nuzzled him briefly before announcing her departure, and flew out the cottage door, certain to close it behind her.
You continued eating, watching Angel out of the corner of your eye. Soon enough, after ensuring that Fluttershy had left, Angel hopped up from his basket and carried his bowl into the kitchen. He leapt up onto a chair and onto the table across from you, and went on with eating the carrot slices, leaving the lettuce untouched as he ate. Fluttershy had scolded him before about not finishing his meals, and you thought about how you might be able to sway him without the ability to speak. In a moment of inspiration, you deftly stole away a piece of the lettuce in his bowl with two fingers, eliciting a tiny gasp from him. Angel pulled his bowl to his side and glared at you as you dangled the leaf over your mouth. You could see his expression quiver a bit as you started to lower it slowly, and paused. Faking a pitiful frown, you offered the lettuce back to him, which he snatched from your grasp and started to wolf it down. He turned his back to you and sat back down facing the bowl, occasionally looking over his shoulder in case you planned on taking anything more. You simply looked away from him and continued to eat, inwardly proud that your plan succeeded.
You started scraping up the remaining bits of your slice of pie onto your fork, and noticed Angel pushing his bowl towards you as you swallowed the last bite. He was rubbing his stomach to indicate he was finished, and inside the bowl sat a single slice of carrot and a small lettuce leaf. You pointed to yourself questioningly, and he nodded. You reached for the offering and started eating, and Angel chittered to himself for a second and smiled before jumping off of the table and heading back into the living room. You stacked the bowl on top of your plate and carried them to the sink, and spent a couple minutes washing all of the dishes and utensils in it. You could understand why Fluttershy doted on Angel so much; while he acted like a bratty child at times, he did show some consideration for others, particularly Fluttershy and now you, her seemingly permanent guest. Finished with the dishes, you walked into the living room towards the couch, when a couple sharp knocks at the door stopped you in your tracks. Remembering Celestia's orders, you sat down quietly, putting a finger to your lips when Angel looked at you in confusion from his basket.
"Oh, Fluttershy-yyyy! I'm ba-aaaaaack!" a male voice called out as the door sprang open and collided with the wall behind it with a loud wham. You watched in half-surprise, half-terror as a tall, goat-headed creature wearing a colorful floral shirt stepped inside. Calling the sight 'strange,' was an understatement; the creature seemed to have parts from all sorts of animals grafted onto him. A lion's paw for one arm, a bird-like set of claws on the opposite arm, two completely different horns- all of his appendages were mismatched, like a toy built by a child. He was carrying a bright orange cup in his claws, which he literally drank, leaving the cup-shaped fluid floating in his hand, which he tossed into the yard before stepping in.
"I remembered to use the door this time, and it didn't leave a mark in the wall!" he announced proudly, folding his umbrella and setting it by the doorway. Immediately, his attention turned to you, and you both stared at one another for several silent seconds. Suddenly, his eyes widened in realization.
"Oh, hello there," he laughed, approaching you with a curious expression. "You're a human, aren't you? Why, I haven't seen one of you in ages!" Against your better judgement, you stood up to greet him, smiling nervously. He hummed to himself as he circled and inspected you, and stood before you with his paw on his chin.
"I distinctly recall you 'hue-mans' looking differently, though," he muttered. He snapped his claws, and you felt a strange sensation all over your body. You looked down in confusion as you noticed your hands had become a lime green color, as well as the rest of your skin.
"Ah, that looks more familiar. At least, I think so." He started moving around you again as you panicked, unable to rub away the color, before Angel rushed in between you both and held up his paw, as if directing the creature to stop. You would have scooped him up and sprinted away right then and there, had you not been absolutely terrified of what would happen next. The goat-headed creature bent down to Angel's level, and put his paw to his ear as Angel started chattering away, occasionally agreeing and acknowledging the tiny rabbit. He snapped his claws again, and your skin returned to its normal color.
"Oh dear, I'm dreadfully sorry for startling you... what was it again?" the creature apologized, looking back down to Angel, who chittered curtly in response. "Anon, right. I'm Discord, a close friend of Fluttershy's, is she here right now?" You shook your head, still inspecting your body for any more signs of green. Angel continued speaking to Discord, who frowned in disappointment.
"Well, darn. I just came back from vacation, and I was hoping to catch up with on our regular tea parties, but Fluttershy's not here right now," Discord complained, his floral shirt disappearing with another snap. "Unless, of course, you would like to have tea?" You nodded in agreement- you didn't have many other options, and it seemed like a good idea to try and befriend Discord.
"Wonderful! I'll put the kettle on," Discord replied gleefully. He sat down in the chair beside the couch, and with yet another snap, a porcelain tea kettle and miniature heating plate appeared on the coffee table. The kettle was painted with a delicate pattern of roses, which was starkly contrasted by the large, black smile across its side. You sat down on the couch and watched Discord as he divined a spigot out of nowhere, and poured water into the kettle. The spigot disappeared in a flash, and he pressed a button on the base of the heating plate.
"Here comes my favorite part- I love the sound of a screaming kettle," he bubbled, holding his chin as he watched the kettle heat up.
You noticed, after a few moments, that the kettle's smile was steadily turning into a frown, and that a light blush was growing where the kettle's cheeks would have been, if kettles normally had them. You thought about Discord's comment for a moment, and realized just a second too late what was in store. The kettle started to whine obnoxiously, and steadily grew in volume until it erupted into a horrendous scream, steam escaping its spout. You barely heard another snap when a tea set popped up onto the table, and Discord lifted the tea kettle off the plate with an oven mitt and set it onto a thick mat next to the plate. He turned and revealed a small paper box from behind him and opened the lid to you, revealing a variety of different teabags. You reached to grab one labelled 'Earl Grey,' but it instead flew up and smacked you in the face a couple times before landing in the cup closest to you.
"Sorry about that. They can be a little aggressive," Discord apologized, yelling over the still-screaming kettle, giggling to himself. You were absolutely dumbfounded at the events of the last twenty minutes, yet Angel, who was sitting next to you, looked unfazed. After pouring his own cup of tea and teleporting the kettle and heating plate away, Discord folded his leg and turned towards you.
"So, Anon, you're a pretty quiet fellow, even quieter than Fluttershy. But please, tell me about yourself." You sat silently, apprehensively considering his request. Discord sipped his tea carefully, and smiled at you.
"Is something wrong? I assure you, I won't judge you- just look at me," he assured, gesturing to his body. "I'm certainly not one to go about judging others. Go ahead, speak up."
You spoke in your usual garbled mess, albeit quieter than normal. I can't speak properly. Discord leaned forward, his ear craning comically towards you.
"Come again?"
You let fly more gibberish, now audible. I. Cannot. Speak. Properly. You fought to keep your head up, suddenly self-conscious. Discord hesitated for a moment, and laughed to himself.
"Silly me, I haven't brushed up on my Human-ese in a long time. Let's see, umm..."
He then started speaking in a strange language, not just a mess of sounds like you, but you still didn't understand. You began to argue with him, and the conversation went nowhere quickly. You were slowly becoming frustrated, while Discord only grew more amused with each passing minute. Angel's expression turned from apathy to annoyance after only a few minutes of the unintelligible exchange, and he fished the whiteboard and marker out of your pocket and thrust them into your hands. He made a zipper-like motion across his lips in irritation.
"Oh, how delectably confusing!" Discord exclaimed, making a kissing motion to his fingertips. "I can't understand a single thing you're saying. I can't understand a single thing I'm saying, for that matter." You sighed, mentally exhausted. You had a mild headache from attempting to speak for such a long time, and sipped your tea in the hopes that he wouldn't prompt you for more.
"Well, I suppose I could tell you a bit about myself, then," he began, setting his cup down. "I am a draconequus, and am the living embodiment of chaos in Equestria. I used to be a real pain for ponies around here, but after I became friends with Fluttershy, and in turn with her friends, I do what I can to help out. I've even helped save the world a few times." He spoke with an air of grandeur that had you wondering just how much of his biography wasn't exaggeration, and how good of friends he was with Fluttershy.
"I'm sure you've noticed my magical abilities already, but I can do so much more than teleport and create things from thin air. Why, I even came up with a way to transport things from separate dimensions! I come here from my own little pocket dimension all the time," he continued proudly. You recalled Twilight's story, and the idol that she and Celestia had found when you first arrived. You hastily doodled it as best as you could remember, and turned your whiteboard to him.
"Oh, I recognize that, yes! I was trying to get in touch with humans when I misplaced it. How do you-" Discord's rambling halted, and he blinked at you once. His expression faded into mild embarrassment, and he slapped his forehead.
"Right. If you're here, that means the idol's been found. Which means I'm probably going to get an earful from Celestia-"
"DISCORD!" You heard Twilight's voice outside the front door, which glowed bright purple and opened itself to allow her entrance. She barged in hastily, sliding to a stop when she saw the two of you sharing tea.
"... or her faithful student, Princess Twilight."
"Wait, were you expecting me?" she asked quizzically.
"You could say that, yes. Anon here just informed me that the human idol I created is the reason he's here," Discord replied in a dull tone of voice. "Do you happen to know who activated it?"
"That would be... me, actually," she sighed. "I'm sorry for barging in, I just noticed that Anon was exposed to a high amount of magical activity, and thought something was wrong." You reached for the choker around your neck. The gemstone was surprisingly warm, and your fingertips tingled as you touched it. Discord looked back to you and the choker, then back to Twilight.
"I see. I was wondering what that little trinket was for. Why keep an eye on him, though? He's as harmless as Fluttershy is." Discord asked before taking another drink from his cup.
"The last humans that came to Equestria destroyed an entire village and its inhabitants, that's why," Twilight retorted. Discord spat out his drink, and hastily spawned a towel that began to clean up the mess on its own.
"That's terrible! Why wasn't I told about this?" Oddly enough, to you, Discord seemed genuinely shocked. He had planned to bring humans here, but didn't anticipate what would have happened when they arrived. You started to believe that there was truth to his story of good intentions towards Fluttershy and the other Elements.
"It happened a few decades after you were imprisoned, and Celestia removed all traces of humans after she exiled them all to the dragon lands, where they perished," she replied. "Now we need your help to send Anon back home and make sure this doesn't happen again."
"Unfortunately, Twilight, I can't help you, as much as I would like to," Discord murmured. "I honestly don't remember how to send things back to his world, it's been so long."
"What do you mean, you don't remember? You take things to and from your own dimension all the time, even ponies!"
"I just don't. I've never actually done it myself before, save for my home and Equestria. I created my idols as a locus for magic, but without them, there's nothing I can do." While Discord and Twilight bickered about the idol, you saw movement outside the window by the door. Fluttershy had returned from her trip, and looked inside with concern. She pushed open the door, which creaked loudly, drawing all attention in the room to her. Her ears flattened a bit as she closed it behind her.
"Sorry to interrupt everypony, I just heard voices from outside, and I wasn't expecting company," she mumbled. Discord opened his arms wide, motioning her towards him.
"No problem at all! I came straight here to see you after I came home, and you're just the pony I wanted to see," he cheered, giving her a tight hug. "Although, Anon here was kind enough to let me be his company in your stead." Fluttershy grinned sheepishly at you.
"Ah, I see. I hope you weren't too frightened or anything. Discord can be... eccentric at times. No offense," she remarked.
"None taken." Twilight cleared her throat, and approached Fluttershy.
"I'm glad that we've all reunited, but I have some news I wanted to pass on, some that you and Anon might be happy to hear," she began. You leaned forward attentively.
"Princess Celestia and Luna have reviewed the data I've collected from Anon since he's arrived, and they've decided that, so long as one of the Elements stays with him, he is welcome to move about Ponyville as he wishes, in the public eye." Twilight announced happily. You felt your heart swell, and Fluttershy gasped excitedly.
"That's great! What made them change their minds?"
"After seeing how considerate and hardworking he was, Luna and I managed to convince Celestia that he was worth trusting. She studied the information you provided carefully, and felt that it would be worth giving humans a second chance, since Anon is the only one here in Equestria." Twilight gave you a polite nod, and Discord applauded you, accompanied by the appearance of several floating copies of his hands.
"What do you say, Fluttershy, want to give him a tour of the town? See the sights?" he suggested. Before Fluttershy could respond, Twilight held out her hoof in front of her.
"No, you're still coming with me, as I said before. Celestia needs your help with the idol, and you're the only one who understands how it works."
"Well, I don't know if 'understand' is the right word," he replied nonchalantly. Twilight shot him a fiery glare, and he looked to you and Fluttershy in desperation.
"I don't know, this sounds pretty important. I think you should go, just to see what you can do to help." Fluttershy mused.
"Et tu, Fluttershy?" he sighed in defeat. "And even if I do help, have you asked how he feels about going home? He seems pretty comfortable here," he whined, gesturing to you with his paw. All three of them cast one another uncertain glances, but remained quiet. Despite your small victory, the thought of being sent back to the world you didn't even remember didn't sound like the best plan of action; you'd already been flung into this one, and Discord was right- you had been growing used to it, even after just five days' time. Twilight sighed, and approached you.
"Look, I know that it's nice here in Equestria, and I believe that you want to help ponies here, but we don't know for certain what effects it or anything in it will have on you. I can't guarantee that you'll even be able to go back, but we have to find a way so that you at least have a choice, okay?" There was reason to Twilight's words, and you gave her a half-hearted nod of agreement.
"Alright. Just hang in there, Anon. We'll keep in touch." After exchanging nods with Twilight, Discord snapped one last time, and he, Twilight, and the entire tea set disappeared.
"Well, I wouldn't mind giving you a tour of Ponyville, if you'd like," Fluttershy piped up, breaking the awkward silence hanging in the room. "It's a lovely day out, and I'd be happy to go for a walk with you." You weren't certain how to respond, still dazed from the rapid change of events that had occurred. Sure, you were happy that your plan to gain Celestia's trust had worked out, but you couldn't shake the feeling that it would soon be for naught, once Twilight and the princesses found a way to send you back to Earth. Fluttershy noticed you spacing out, and laid her head on your knee to get your attention, looking up at you with gentle eyes.
"It's going to be alright, Anon. I know things have probably been moving quickly for you, too quickly for anypony to handle, but I believe that things will turn out alright," she said reassuringly. You lifted your palm to her cheek, and her expression radiated warmth. Once again, you found yourself instantly calmed by those big, teal-blue eyes; you didn't get why or how she did it, but you couldn't be bothered to think about it. Her consideration for you was enough. You rose to your feet, and you felt a warm tug on your hand. You looked down to see Angel hanging from your fingers by his front paws, and you curled your hand to allow him to climb up into your palm. Fluttershy gasped as he turned away from her embarrassedly.
"Did you want to come with Anon too, Angel?" she asked with a soft giggle. He gave her a curt nod and tapped on your wrist, gesturing upwards. You lifted your arm a bit, and Angel scurried up your arm onto your shoulder, holding onto your ear as he made himself comfortable. Surprised as you were, it was nice to see that he had warmed up to you, even if he didn't want Fluttershy to notice. You smiled contentedly at her, and strode over to the cottage door to head outside. A cool breeze blew past you, causing Angel to grip your ear tightly, though not hard enough to hurt. You heard Fluttershy shut the door behind you, and you followed her across the short bridge and onto the path that led to Ponyville's center.
Quiet minutes passed as you continued farther and farther away from the cottage, and the town appeared in view as you passed the top of a large hill. Faint, colorful figures passed back and forth, occasionally stopping to talk to one another in the midday sun. Initially you had been pretty excited to leave the safety of the cottage, but on seeing the town at a closer distance, anxiety started settling in the bottom of your stomach. Fluttershy noticed your hesitation, and turned around to face you, still smiling sweetly.
"Remember Anon- it's going to be okay. Sure, you're new to Ponyville, and ponies might give you a few strange looks, but I'll be right here with you to make sure nopony bothers you." She booped your hand with her snout, and resumed walking down the hill towards the town. You took a deep breath and exhaled before following her, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach. After a few more minutes of walking, you both reached the edge of town, where Fluttershy stopped at a bridge above the mouth of the creek that passed by the cottage.
"First, if you look over to your left, that big building there is Carousel Boutique, where Rarity lives and works. As I told you before, she makes clothing for all kinds of ponies, and even runs her own fashion lines; I'll bet, once you get to meet her, she'd be willing to make you some new clothes, so you don't have to keep washing the same set every day." You paid close attention as Fluttershy spoke. The building absolutely exuded an aura of fanciness and regal style that raised doubts that any pony working there would be interested in simple clothing like t-shirts and jeans. Still, you assumed, Fluttershy would know better.
"Unfortunately, she's still coming back from Manehattan from her most recent show, but she should be arriving tomorrow," she continued. "We can try talking to her then. For now, I think we should go visit Pinkie Pie, I'll bet she'd love to meet you. Sugarcube Corner is just down the street."
You made considerable effort to avoid the curious stares of ponies in the town as Fluttershy led you to her destination. Every now and again, she would give a gentle greeting to some passersby, to which they would respond without taking their eyes off of you. Most of them retained their smiles or returned to their original task within a few moments, though, and you started to realize that the town residents were about as laid-back as Fluttershy has previously suggested. Perhaps her expertise in taking care of animals of all kinds was well-known, and they only viewed you as some exotic creature under her care. You snorted, realizing that was pretty much the exact situation you were in. You came to an abrupt halt as a mint-green unicorn bounded up to you, smiling in awe.
"Whoa! I've never seen one of these before! Fluttershy, what is this?" she asked.
"Oh, hi Lyra. This is Anon, he's what we call a 'human,' that came to Ponyville recently after... an accident," Fluttershy explained. "He's very kind, and he helps me out at my cottage. He actually built the birdhouse I brought you yesterday." Lyra let out an odd, amused gasp of amazement, looking you up and down, before fixating on your hands.
"Oh, he's got claws? But they look so soft!" Lyra exclaimed.
"No, he has 'hands,' and the parts on the outside are called 'fingers.'" Fluttershy laughed. You couldn't help but crack a grin as the unicorn looked up at you expectantly.
"Mr. Anon, c-could I touch your hands? Is that okay?" You looked at Fluttershy in bewilderment, who returned the expression with a shrug. You held out your palm for Lyra, fingers outstretched, and she gently rubbed them with the edge of her hoof, cooing like a curious child. Quickly, she gave you her thanks and sprinted off past you and Fluttershy, leaving you almost as confused as you had been with Discord.
"I... I honestly wasn't expecting that to happen," Fluttershy remarked. "But see? You've only been in Ponyville for a few minutes, and ponies already like you."
You laughed nervously, internally debating whether or not being ostracized by ponies would be better than more introductions like Lyra's. Fluttershy continued to help you familiarize yourself with the town as you both walked, mostly shops and houses of a few ponies she was familiar with, until you finally reached Sugarcube Corner. As Fluttershy opened the door ahead of you, deep down, you hoped that your day wouldn't end anywhere near as strangely as it had began. |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 7 - Day 5 pt. 2 | "Welcome to Sugarcube Corner! How can I help-"
The sound of rapid hoofsteps behind you distracted you from the shopkeeper's greeting, although not nearly as much as being suddenly bowled over when you turned around to its source. A pink blob smothered your face while it send you sliding on your back across the floor, gently bumping your head against the counter as you came to a stop. You grasped the suffocating object and lifted it high up to discover a giggling, cherubic pink Earth pony in your hands.
"HI! You must be new here! My name's Pinkie Pie, what's yours?" she bubbled, her cotton candy-like mane bobbing as she spoke.
"Pinkie! How many times have I asked you not to come barreling into the shop?" scolded the shopkeeper, who approached the two of you in irritation. "You'll run into customers, doing that!"
"I'm sorry, Mrs. Cake," Pinkie whined. The mare in your clutches went slack, frowning in shame. Pinkie Pie's regretful baby-blues locked onto you, making your chest tighten. You quickly set her to the side and got back up to your feet, brushing dirt off of your clothes in an attempt to avoid eye contact again. At first, Fluttershy and Apple Bloom seemed like the only ponies who made you fear for your heart health, but you were quickly realizing that the potential danger of any upset pony face was very real.
"Don't apologize to her, Pinkie," Fluttershy interjected, trotting up to you in concern. "You should apologize to Anon, you both could have gotten seriously hurt!"
"I really am sorry, but as I was coming back, my tail went all wink-wonk, and I just knew somepony new had come!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, her fluffy tail kinking for emphasis. Somehow, she had known about your arrival, even though Twilight and Discord were the only ones who should have. Fluttershy had mentioned that Pinkie Pie could be eccentric at times, but you hadn't expected her to be psychic. Still, it wasn't the strangest thing you'd experienced all day.
"Anon, this is Pinkie Pie, a friend of mine that I wanted to introduce to you to. She's one of the best bakers I know, along with Mrs. Cake, here," Fluttershy explained. The blue mare behind the counter smiled bashfully before turning her attention back on Pinkie.
"Did you remember the delivery receipt?" Mrs. Cake asked expectantly.
"Uh-huh!" Pinkie walked towards her and comically pulled a small slip of paper out of her poofy mane. Mrs. Cake looked as startled as you probably did, and took the receipt, slipping it into a drawer under the register.
"Right. Well, you've got another delivery to make in a few minutes, so make sure you're not late," Mrs. Cake remarked, checking a list on the clipboard hanging from the doorway near the counter.
"I suppose it would have been better if we had come when you weren't busy," Fluttershy commented. "But would it be too much trouble to get Anon a sample of one of your treats? I didn't bring any bits with me, this was kind of a last-minute visit."
"Sure!" Pinkie chirped, bouncing past you to a nearby shelf of baked goods. "Any friend of Fluttershy's is a friend of mine, even if I have absolutely no idea who they are!" You looked down to see Fluttershy giving you an amused grin while Pinkie rummaged through the wrapped treats. Pinkie Gave a hearty 'a-hah' once she selected one, a basket with bright blue-iced cupcake larger than your fist inside. She held it out to you by the handle in her teeth, and prodded your stomach with her snout when you hesitated taking it from her. You signed your thanks to her and took the basket by its bottom. You carried your gift over to a nearby table and started unwrapping the paper around the cupcake. You felt a little guilty for having such a large "sample," but your growling stomach convinced you it was worth overlooking. Pinkie Pie's expectant stare bore into you as you took your first bite.
"So, what do you think? How is it?"
Though you had only taken a small bite, the cupcake was the sweetest, most blissful thing you'd ever eaten in your life. Pinkie's words melted away in your mind as you grumbled euphorically over your next mouthful. The cake was moist, spongy, and tasted like heaven, if heaven were made of angel-food cake, blueberries, and the dreams of young foals. The buttercream icing was smooth and rich, and you felt like you could eat an entire barrel of it, if you were given the chance. For several seconds, you reveled in the sugar-induced high, before opening your eyes to see Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie chuckling to themselves.
"I think that means he likes it," Fluttershy joked. "From what I've seen so far, humans have a real sweet tooth."
"That's great! I've got a super-duper secret project I've been working on, and Nonny would be perfect for it!" Pinkie replied, making you cease devouring your meal for a moment.
"'Nonny?'"
"You know, A-non, Nonny? I thought it was a good nickname."
"I guess so. 'Nonny and Pinkie', huh?"
"It sounds good, right? But it might sound better like 'Pinkie and Nonny'."
You continued to focus on the cupcake as they both chatted, until all that was left was crumbs. Seeing the two ponies caught up in conversation, you took the opportunity to get a good look at the interior of the bakery. The shelves along the walls were lined with all sorts of cakes, cookies, candies, and even party decor; while much of what was on display was edible, the lack of tables and booths told you that the shop probably ran mostly on catering and party events. The decorations you had seen on the outside of the shop made it stand out like a sore thumb in comparison to the rest of the town, but at least they seemed to fit what seemed to be the shop's only real employee.
"Well, I suppose Anon and I should get going, so you can get back to work. We still haven't finished our trip yet," Fluttershy announced before getting up from her seat at the table.
"Wait, can I come?" Pinkie Pie asked, drawing a confused hum from Fluttershy.
"What about your delivery?"
"You can follow me, and talk to Anon about Ponyville on the way!"
"That's not exactly you coming with us, but I suppose that would work." You weren't certain, but for a brief moment, you swore that there was something strange about Fluttershy's tone.
After a polite yet stern lecture from Mrs. Cake, Pinkie led you and Fluttershy out across town for her delivery- a large, inconspicuously wrapped box of frosted cookies. The order had specifically asked that the delivery be as subtle as possible, as it was a surprise gift that the customer didn't want spoiled. You had politely offered to carry the box for Pinkie, who was more concerned about introducing you to passersby than being discrete in any form or fashion. Fluttershy, patient as ever, took every opportunity between the Earth pony's ramblings to talk about the various shops and attractions the small town had to offer.
"And this shop belongs to Ponyville's florist, Roseluck! Most of the flowers she sells aren't for eating, but she-"
"ROSELUCK!" Pinkie interrupted, once again startling you, as well as a nearby mare whose raspberry-colored hair stood on end. "Have you met Anon?"
"Do you mean him?" Roseluck asked, pointing towards you. "I saw him earlier today with Lyra. She wouldn't stop talking about him and his 'hands.' I was about to go find her, actually." The cream-colored pony flashed you a polite smile and turned to walk away.
"Oh, okay! Sorry to bother you!" Pinkie called out before turning to you. She stepped close to you and craned her neck beneath the box in your hands.
"What are you doing?" Fluttershy asked, leaning her head down to meet hers.
"I'm checking out Anon's hands, silly! I want to know what Lyra thought was special about them." Chills went up your back as you felt her breath on your fingers, and you stood stock-still, not uncomfortable but very confused.
"This isn't really the time, is it? You might be late for your delivery," Fluttershy argued, her wings shifting uneasily.
"Don't worry, it'll be fine!"
"But..."
"It'll just be a second."
You couldn't recall seeing Fluttershy look or sound as uncomfortable as she did then, although you had no idea why. Maybe she was concerned about Pinkie making a scene; the three of you were standing out in the open, and you naturally drew stares from ponies walking by anyway. You balanced the box in one hand and set the other on Fluttershy's head, hoping to reassure her in the only way you knew how.
"Wha-!" Fluttershy yelped, freezing as you ruffled her mane with your fingers. Her head immediately jerked down to face the ground, her ears folding back in embarrassment. You leaned forward to try and see her face, which she hid behind her mane. Pinkie watched you with curiosity, and started bobbing up and down in place excitedly.
"Ooh, do me next, do me next!" she begged, presenting the crown of her head to you. Unsurprised by her enthusiasm, you set the box down onto the ground and gingerly set your free hand on her head and started scratching. You felt her push into your palm, and swore you saw one of her back hooves rapidly shudder in place for a second. You looked around the area as you continued to pet the two mares, checking to make sure no one was around, staring. The only sign of any ponies was a glimpse of a seafoam-striped tail that slipped past a building behind you, and you sighed in relief. After a few more seconds, Fluttershy relaxed slightly, and looked up at you with a weak smile.
"Don't... we have a delivery to finish?" Fluttershy asked quietly. You nodded, while Pinkie Pie only hummed contentedly, stopping when you withdrew your hands and snapped your fingers to get her attention.
"Right! Let's go~!" Pinkie cheered, turning about-face and holding her hoof out as if she were leading a charge. You picked up the box with another sigh, and resumed your position between the two ponies as they continued walking. As you looked over the various houses and other buildings on the way to your destination, though, you noticed that both Fluttershy and Pinkie were considerably quieter than before. You figured it was better than their awkward attempts at vying for your attention, at least.
You all kept walking through town, and cut through an alleyway to another open square, where you could see a burly, frustrated stallion beside a large cart full of cabbages. Pinkie Pie gasped, and sprinted over towards him, spurring you and Fluttershy to hurry along with her.
"Heya, Patch! We were just coming to see you!" Pinkie shouted, earning a loud hush from the stallion, who looked around frantically.
"Hey, easy on the volume! I said to be discrete, didn't I?" Patch hissed in a Boston-esque accent. He gave you a stern look, and turned back to Pinkie. "And apparently you don't know what 'discrete' means, given your tall friend over here followin' you around." You instinctively opened your mouth to try and set him straight, but stopped short as Fluttershy stepped in front of you.
"Don't worry about Anon, everypony here is just fine with him around. But what are you doing out here?" Fluttershy interjected. You felt the end of her tail wrap lightly around your calf as she backed up to you a few inches.
"It's this bum cart," Patch complained, kicking the cart for good measure. "The rear left wheel's jammed, and it won't budge. I was hoping to get home before you showed up so I could get my, uh... package, but it locked up on me and I've been stuck here." As if directed by the universe itself, the wheel promptly loosened itself from the cart with a crack and rolled away. Patch dashed under the edge of the cart, which spilled a few cabbages onto the ground. You felt a twinge of sympathy for the stallion, and set down his package to help lift the cart off of him, hoisting it up with both hands above your head.
"Hey! What's the big idea, pal?" he snorted, puffing up towards you menacingly.
"Anon's just trying to help, Patch, don't worry!" Pinkie interrupted, jumping between you both.
"Pinkie's right, Anon's not hurting anypony," Fluttershy added adamantly. You gave patch a smug grin as he stared you down before standing down.
"Fine, my bad. It's not everyday you see some friendly giant helpin' ponies out, though, right?" Patch apologized. "I'm sorry for snappin', it's just been a rough day. I'll show you the rest of the way to my shop, and I can pay you for the delivery."
Along the way to his shop, Patch informed you that the box was, in fact, for his son, Sprout, who would be coming home from school only a couple hours later. Today was his son's birthday, and Patch had taken great strides to keep the delivery a surprise, even avoiding Sugarcube Corner altogether, which was in line-of-sight of the school's playground. He saved up profits from his run-down vegetable shop, mailed his order in and scheduled ahead of time, and even contacted the parents of Sprout's friends, all so that he could make the colt's first real birthday celebration special. You had nearly shed a tear after hearing Patch's story, finally understanding how stressed he must have been, especially as a single father. Like many of the ponies Pinkie had introduced you to earlier in the day, he was initially confused by you communicating via your whiteboard doodles, but, nevertheless, you managed to convey your forgiveness to him.
In the distance, you heard the tolls of the school bell, just moments after helping Patch unload the last few heads of cabbage into his shop's storage area out back. Pinkie and Fluttershy's hammering on the cart's wheel stopped, and the stallion's ears perked up.
"Sounds like Sprout just started recess. Shouldn't be long, now," he commented, grinning in anticipation. After making a final count on his inventory, he shut the rear door of the shop and strode up to you.
"I'd like to apologize again for earlier, and thank you for helpin' me out." He lifted his hoof out, which you promptly shook, nodding your head for emphasis.
"We've fixed your cart's wheel, I think," Fluttershy added, walking up to your side. "Did you need anything else?"
"No, no, I should be fine. To be honest, I wasn't expectin' a cart repair service with my delivery, but I suppose I should pay up, now that everythin's settled." You and Pinkie pulled the cart out to the front of the shop, and all of you waited patiently after Patched ducked inside.
"So what do you wanna do once we get back to Sugarcube Corner?" Pinkie Piped up.
"Back to Sugarcube Corner? Oh, I was actually thinking of taking Anon back home, since we've been out and about all afternoon," Fluttershy muttered, pawing at the ground. "I'm... actually pretty tired, and we haven't eaten lunch, either."
"Oh." You almost expected to hear the sound of a deflating balloon as Pinkie's expectant look drooped in disappointment. Milliseconds passed, however, before she brightened once more. "Well, you could always come by later this week. It's not like we're going anywhere soon!" You hummed in agreement, and gave her a thumbs-up. Fluttershy started to respond, but was cut off by the shop bell tinkling as Patch exited the shop, carrying two burlap bags in his teeth, which he offered to you.
"Here are the bits for the order, plus a little extra for your help," he remarked gleefully. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have some last-minute errands to run!"
"Have a good day!" Pinkie and Fluttershy shouted as he sprinted off. You opened the first bag, which was full of shiny coins, and handed it to Pinkie Pie. The second, much lighter bag contained a single head of cabbage with a hastily-scrawled thank-you note. Fluttershy's ears perked up when she saw the cabbage, and she hummed quietly to herself.
"I'm not a big fan of cabbage, but I do know a little bunny that happens to love eating it. Let's go ahead and take it home, hm?" Pinkie Pie nodded in agreement, snickering cutely as the change in the bag jingled. She waved to you both with a muffled 'good-bye,' and walked off towards Sugarcube corner. You gave Fluttershy a quick nod, and you both started off for home as well.
The light walk back to Fluttershy's cottage turned into a light jog as both of you soon realized just how long it had been since breakfast; any caloric value in that cupcake that Pinkie had given you had probably been burned away by carrying Patch's cart across Ponyville, and Fluttershy hadn't eaten anything, save for a small bowl of fruit and yogurt. You practically inhaled the salad she prepared while she fussed over Angel at the dining room table. You'd never expected a rabbit to love cabbage so much. You offered your help, hoping to convince him to finish the tiny pieces of squash in his bowl, but even trying to take them away from him failed; not even reverse psychology could tear his focus away from the remaining carrots and cabbage in the fridge. Fluttershy commended your efforts, even as you walked out of the kitchen in defeat. You spread out across the couch and started doodling various objects in the living room on your whiteboard. Although you were pretty adept at drawing when you came to Equestria, it was still nice to practice on your own without the pressure of communicating to someone else.
"Oh, come on!" a voice suddenly shouted, minutes later. You jumped almost half a foot in the air at the disturbance. Across the living room, Twilight was rubbing her forehead, having appeared out of nowhere and clearly irritated.
"He could have at least sent me back to the castle. I didn't think I had to specify..." she complained. Fluttershy dashed into the room from the kitchen, gasping when she saw Twilight.
"Where did you come from? I didn't hear the door open."
"I asked Discord to send me back to Ponyville, but I had expected him to send me home, not back here," Twilight grumbled. "I suppose I can make the most of it by starting with you two."
"What do you mean?" Fluttershy asked, cocking her head to the side.
"I'd like to sit down and talk about what the princesses, Discord, and I talked about." Twilight seated herself in the chair beside you, and gestured for Fluttershy to sit with you. As they were making themselves comfortable, Angel came bounding in and hopped up into your lap, still chewing an overflowing mouthful of cabbage. You set your drawing pad to the side, and leaned forward, elbows on your knees, to give Twilight your full attention. Several sheets of paper appeared in front of her, which she began flipping through while clearing her throat.
"Okay, first off, let's talk about Discord's idol," she began. "Like he said this morning, Discord doesn't remember the entire process of how he created the idol or how it works, but he does remember some of the process. We've concluded that, so long as the idol isn't exposed to any nearby fluctuations in magic, it won't activate again. It's still recharging from when it summoned Anon, so it's being contained in the palace away from ponies other than the princesses and Discord."
"Alright. What does that mean for Anon?" Fluttershy asked, seemingly reading your mind.
"If we can jog Discord's memory on how he made it, he can figure out how to reverse the process... hopefully." She didn't sound certain. You gave her a questioning look, raising your eyebrows.
"What I mean is that things with Discord are usually iffy at best. He's unbelievably powerful, but he's still like any of us. It's been centuries since he last saw one of the idols, and I imagine that it will take a while before we see any real progress." You felt Fluttershy's tail on you for the second time that day, gently draped across your lower back.
"How long?" Fluttershy's tone was curt, almost urgent.
"It could be a couple weeks, couple months, maybe even a couple years," Twilight sighed. "We honestly don't have a clue. Until then, Celestia suggested that Anon could spend his time helping out Ponyville, if he wants."
"You mean like when he helped out Applejack and I?"
"Exactly. Of course, you're more than welcome to stay here with Fluttershy," she replied coyly, looking at you and back to Fluttershy. "But I think you could be a great help here." You shifted your gaze from her to the now embarrassed pegasus next to you, whose tail curled back around her.
"I don't mind..." You were tempted to refuse, but helping out ponies like you had earlier today would probably be better than sitting around in the cottage, drawing all day while Fluttershy went about her own business. You nodded to Twilight for her to continue.
"Well, first off, I thought it would be a good idea for you to get to know our friends here in town, specifically Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Rarity. You already helped Applejack a bit before, so that just leaves the others."
"We went to see Pinkie Pie today, when we were out in town. We helped her with a delivery for a stallion named Patch, and Anon carried his broken-down cart to the shop that Patch owns," Fluttershy remarked. Twilight's eyes widened, and she jerked her head towards the window, craning her neck to look outside. After a few seconds of inspection, she sighed in relief, turning back to you.
"Sorry. For a second there, I wanted to make sure Ponyville was in one piece." You folded your arms and gave Twilight an unamused frown, earning a giggle from her.
"I'm only joking, I promise. I'm glad things went alright for you both," she laughed. She glanced over her notes again. "If I recall correctly, Rarity should be coming back home tomorrow from her show in Manehattan. I spoke with her earlier this week, and asked her to consider helping you with your clothing situation." You nodded and signed your thanks, grateful for her consideration. The prospect of not having to rewash your clothes every day was more than welcome, especially if you would be doing work like you had at Sweet Apple Acres.
"Something else worth noting- we've created copies of the book you edited, and each of the Elements will be getting a copy. If you're going to be spending any extended length of time with them, it would help for them to know what to expect." You instantly recalled Rainbow Dash's reaction to seeing the book, and felt your heart drop into your stomach.
"That said, don't worry, Anon, they're a 'for-your-eyes-only" copy. I was hoping that I could take some time and annotate the book with you myself, but sometime later. For now, though, we don't want anypony misinterpreting the information and making unfair judgements about you, so I'll make sure that only the Elements see what's inside." You nodded solemnly, realizing that she had definitely expected your response. Fluttershy looked about as concerned as you felt, although her expression softened in realization.
"That's good to hear. Anon made a good impression on a few ponies today, I'd hate for them to get the wrong idea about him," she mused. Twilight magically flipped through her notes one final time before they disappeared in a small flash of light and nodded once, satisfied.
"Alright, that's actually all I've got to say. I should probably head out and let the others know what's going on, and finish up compiling my notes."
After a satisfying bath later in the evening, you dried yourself off and stepped back into the living room, carrying your choker in one hand. To your surprise, Fluttershy was still on the couch, sprawled out across it and dozing off quietly. The clock read a quarter past ten; it was certainly past Fluttershy's usual bedtime, and you were feeling pretty drowsy yourself. You set the choker down on the table, and stepped up to the sleeping mare, searching for a way to pick her up without waking her. You considered just waking her up entirely, but you were uncomfortable with the thought of disturbing such an adorable sight; Fluttershy's mane and tail were spread out and dangling off the edge of the cushions, while her hooves were folded up cutely to her chest. Who else, in your situation, would want to ruin a moment like this? Strangely enough, the urge to rub her exposed belly loomed over you, and you struggled to fight it. Even stranger, you actually considered following through- surely, you thought, she wouldn't mind, even if she were awake?
Hesitantly, you placed your palm on the center of her stomach, your fingertips gently resting on her coat. No reaction. Slowly, you drew your fingers back and forth in her fur, and froze as her body reactively curled up after a few seconds. She mumbled something happily in her sleep, and arched her back, pressing her stomach up against your palm. Your chest tightened, and you could feel blood rushing to your cheeks. Part of you, without rhyme or reason, desperately wanted to stay right there, petting Fluttershy until she would inevitably wake up or you would pass out. The rational majority, however, begged for you to withdraw your hand, and you took a deep breath as she feebly squirmed around, seemingly searching for your touch. You sat down on the floor beside the couch, suddenly aware of your rapid heart rate, and took stock of what had just happened.
You, a human, had just given a grown, pastel yellow pegasus tummy rubs while she slept. The opportunity had just presented itself, and you had taken it. You had expected it to feel like petting any other animal would, like with Angel. For whatever reason, it felt much weirder, although you couldn't pin down why. You mentally slapped yourself and recalled your initial task: getting Fluttershy off the couch and going to bed.
Steeling your nerves, you stood up and faced the couch once more. You delicately slid one arm beneath Fluttershy's neck and the other around her rear, taking a gentle grasp of her shoulder and flank. As you began to lift the mare into the air, you begged and pleaded with whatever deity existed that she would stay asleep. Carrying her at chest-height, you wrapped your arms around her back and leaned her against your torso as you tip-toed your way across the living area towards her room.
Every second you took trying to ascend the creaking stairs felt like hours. Somehow, Fluttershy was still asleep, although she had begun sleep talking like the night before. She mumbled something unintelligible and reached out with her hoof, gently bumping your cheek a few times. Half-amused, you leaned your neck away from her when she tried stroking your face. Her nose scrunched up while she pawed weakly at the air, and you laughed quietly as you reached the top of the stairs. Opening her bedroom door was a struggle, but after a few tries you managed to get it open without dropping her. You laid her gently on her back onto the bed, careful not to get your arm caught between the pillow and her mane. You had picked up the edge of the folded comforter and started inching it over her body when, much to your chagrin, you saw a pair of half-lidded teal-blue eyes staring down at you.
"Anon...? Am I still dreaming?" Fluttershy whispered. Sensing the opportunity to get away at hand, you nodded slowly, and continued easing the comforter up to her chest. She stopped you with a hoof, however, and gave you a wide smile.
"If this is just a dream, you don't have to worry about tucking me in, Anon," she remarked in a sleepy, playful tone. "But you could join me- yawn- if you wanted." You were considering backing out of the room when what remained of your astonishingly low willpower was extinguished as Fluttershy put on a heart-wrenching pouty face.
"Please?" she whimpered. You didn't have the constitution to refuse, and hung your head over hers in defeat. She let out a victorious giggle, and reached out to touch your face. You felt the warm, broad pad of her hoof grip your cheek and pull gently to direct your attention up towards her. Your heartbeat throbbed loudly in your ears as you tried to figure out which was more puzzling: her drastic change in attitude towards physical contact with you, or how comfortable you were witnessing it. You stood motionless in the dim, moonlit room, still leaning over Fluttershy, whose drowsy eyes scanned your expression a thousand times over.
The passage of time fell away to the back of your mind, and you felt the strain on your back becoming more difficult to ignore. Not wanting to lose your balance, you propped yourself up with both arms on the bed beside her shoulders, eliciting a quiet gasp from Fluttershy. She shifted back and forth a bit beneath you, and her coy smile started to quiver. She almost appeared as if she was anticipating something. You felt Fluttershy gently tug down on your cheek, and immediately realized what that 'something' was.
In the span of a fraction of a second, you managed to focus on a few of the thousands of thoughts and senses that raced through your head: the sound of her breath as she leaned forward; the slick sweat that had built up between her hoof and your burning cheek; most prominently, the complete and utter lack of any resistance by any muscle in your body.
You couldn't find any hint of discomfort in your mind, even when faced with the blunt realization that you were about to be kissed by a technicolor talking pony you'd only known for four days. That you were completely different creatures. Whatever sense you should have had to pull away from her touch, her gentle prods and other mild displays of affection, had either disappeared the moment she took you in, or never existed in the first place. You couldn't think of a good reason as to why, but as your lips made contact with hers, you didn't care in the slightest.
Fluttershy let out a high-pitched hum of content as she dragged you deeper into the kiss, making your hair stand on end. Your eyes drifted shut, and you let your thoughts fade away as you tilted your head slightly and savored the moment. Precious seconds passed as your mouths subtly shifted around one another, until her grip on you began to waver. She released you from her clutches, and let her head fall back to the pillow, breathing heavily.
"You know, Anon, you usually act more surprised in my dreams when that happens." Your face contorted in shock- just how many times had she dreamed of this situation before?
"Yeah, like that!" she chuckled, before yawning heartily. You lifted one arm as she shifted towards the center of the bed and shot you an expectant look. You crawled beneath the covers, not wanting to disturb her impression that she was still asleep, and laid on your back beside her.
"I kinda... wish this wasn't a dream, though," she mused, leaning forward and burying her face between your neck and shoulder. "It feels real, but it's not. You said so yourself." You fought to keep a straight face and not laugh at the mare's sleepy logic, and accidentally let your shoulders quake in a tiny snort.
"Are you alright?" You nodded and dismissed her concern with a gentle wave.
"That's good. If you don't mind though, Anon- yawn- I'm still feeling sleepy. I know I said before that you didn't need to tuck me in, but I think now's a good time to take back what I said. Is that okay?" You obliged her request, and drew up the comforter over both of you. She stretched for a few moments, squeezing your hand with her upper thighs, before relaxing and leaning her snout against your neck. You closed your eyes and listened while her breathing grew more steady as she drifted off. Sleep sounded like a good plan, you thought, feeling the world around you gradually floating away. Lost in the mix of emotions slowing to a crawl in your mind, you too felt like floating away. |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 8 - Day 6 | When you woke up the following morning, it felt as if you had only slept for a few minutes. You were well-rested, but the events of the previous night were all you could think about. You turned your head and watched Fluttershy, who was quietly snoring on the opposite side of the bed. You pondered your feelings about having humored the "dream" she had that night. On one hand, as a human alone in a world of ponies, dragons, and whatever else existed, the fact that any creature in Equestria would have romantic interest in you was flattering, in a way. On the other hand, you had consciously reciprocated that interest, knowing that you weren't dreaming. Even if it was just to humor her, you could have easily chosen to not follow-through. You still couldn't think of a reason why you didn't. You, could, however, recall the feeling of her soft lips against yours, and wistfully imagined what it would be like if it were to happen again. Not an unwelcome thought, for sure.
You considered reaching over to wake Fluttershy, surprised that the sunshine peeking through the trees outside hadn't already. But if she thought last night were a dream, you realized, waking up in bed with you now would alert her to the truth. To be honest, you weren't certain how she would react. You held your breath as you inched one foot off of the bed to the ground, careful not to shake the mattress. Occasionally, the sleeping mare would let out a murmur or two, causing you to freeze, but showed no signs of your escape attempt. After several agonizing minutes spent sliding onto the floor, you crawled quietly towards the door. A quiet squeak startled you as you swung it open, revealing an equally startled Angel, who stumbled forward into your face. He had probably just gotten up, and was here to wake Fluttershy up. You gently pushed him off of your cheek and pressed your index finger to your lips, letting out a quiet hush. Angel silently looked over towards Fluttershy and back to you several times, not quite piecing together the situation.
Within moments, he reached to knock on the door nonetheless, and you barely managed to wedge your palm between his paw and its target. Thinking quickly under his deepening glare, you made a chopping motion with your hands, as one would a knife and cutting board. You were more than willing to make his breakfast a thousand times over if it meant avoiding trying to draw or pantomime an excuse for the night before. Angel seemed to understand, rubbing his stomach and pointing downstairs for confirmation. You nodded rapidly and pushed the door open further. Content with his new personal chef, Angel hopped onto your shoulder and held on tight as you rose to your feet. Rather than deal with the creaking stairs again, you sat on the banister and slid quietly down to the living room. You cupped your hand to your ear and reaffirmed that Fluttershy was indeed asleep, and moved to the kitchen to start preparing Angel's breakfast.
You gave out a sigh of relief as Angel inspected the tiny slices of carrot on the cutting board, finally satisfied with your sixth attempt at cutting them properly. You glanced over to your whiteboard, propped up against a ceramic jar and covered in tiny doodles of cut carrots. You couldn't figure out how Fluttershy put up with Angel's attitude towards having such precise carrot slice thickness. At least he'd had enough patience to demand your whiteboard and marker as to properly teach you how to prepare his meal, and with such pomp, too. The way he waved the marker around like a baton as you tried to copy his drawing had been surprisingly irritating. You slid the slices into a bowl and carried it to the dining room table, where he promptly plopped down and started devouring his food. You hesitated, and he paused halfway through chewing to stare at you impatiently. You swore you heard him sniff as he waved you off curtly. Your mild annoyance was kept at bay by your gratitude towards the baby rabbit; you were worried for a short time that he would give up on you and rush upstairs at any moment. In hindsight, you could have just woken Fluttershy up yourself by pretending to have been downstairs all night, but you were still unsure how she would react to having been carried by you in the first place. As you reached to retrieve your whiteboard, as if on cue, a faint creaking sound came from the other room- the sound of Fluttershy's door opening. You took a deep breath and exhaled. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Angel give you a brief thumbs-up before stuffing his face with more carrot.
"Anon? Angel? Hello?" Fluttershy called out. Surprisingly, she sounded more curious than concerned. You gave her a short wave from inside the kitchen, beckoning her to come in.
"Oh my, did you make breakfast for Angel? And he's eating it?" she asked, stupefied. She stepped past you and inspected the bowl of carrots as Angel continued shoveling slice after slice into his mouth. He grumbled in frustration as she went further, looking into his eyes and ears.
"Well, he's not visibly ill, and he's eating, so I suppose you were really lucky," she added with a pleased sigh. "A wonderful night's rest, and now a break from making breakfast for everypony- this is certainly a lovely start to the day." You both exchanged smiles as she yawned and stretched her wings, and set about preparing your own meals.
Minutes later, several sharp knocks rang out from outside the front door. You rose from your seat to answer it, giving Fluttershy a polite nod while you gestured for her to continue eating. Oddly enough, you heard muffled arguing behind the door as you reached for the knob.
"Are you sure this is a good idea, Twilight?" a familiar voice whined.
"Of course! I'm sure you'll be fine." Unsurprisingly, Twilight was the first to greet you when you opened the door. "Good morning, Anon! Are you ready to go?" Go... where?, you thought.
"Who is it?" Fluttershy called out, sticking her head out from the kitchen doorway.
"It's me and Rainbow Dash," Twilight replied. "We're picking up Anon so he can spend some time with her, today."
"Spend time with Rainbow?" Fluttershy asked quizzically. You were equally confused. Just past Twilight, you could see the blue pegasus laying atop a ground-level cloud, lazily watching clouds roll by overhead. You could also see a rope... seemingly tied around the cloud. Was that normal?
"Yeah. Since Rarity just got home, Twilight figured Anon should hang out with me today," Rainbow Dash explained, sitting up to look at you. "I still have to work, though, so you'll be following me around on this cloud, here." You jumped a little when you felt something gently brush your thigh; you looked down to see Fluttershy suddenly beside you, inspecting the cloud.
"But how are you going to do that?" she asked. A tickling sensation went up your leg as you felt the tip of her tail wrap timidly around your ankle.
"Simple- I'll use my cloud-walking spell on him, like anypony else." Twilight smiled at you reassuringly as she spoke. You were reminded of your past experiences with her magic, and adjusted the choker around your neck. It was easy to forget that, at any time, anything you did could be observed and recorded. You had conveniently left the choker in the bathroom after your shower the night before, though- at least your 'moment' with Fluttershy was still secret.
"Don't you think that's a bit, you know, dangerous?" Fluttershy pressed.
"I'll make sure he's fine, don't worry," interrupted Rainbow Dash, rolling off of the cloud. "Now c'mon, I've gotta get busy clearing clouds so I can practice my routine!" You looked down to Fluttershy and patted her head reassuringly. You hadn't known Rainbow Dash for very long, but if she was anything like the rest of Fluttershy's friends, you were sure that you would be fine.
After running to the kitchen to retrieve your marker and whiteboard, you gave Fluttershy a thumbs-up before walking out the front door. Twilight's magic enveloped your whole body as she cast her spell on you, and you couldn't help but consider Fluttershy's earlier comment. Still, the opportunity to actually walk on a cloud seemed too good to pass up. You slowly pressed one hand onto the cloud's surface, surprised that there was, as expected, little-to-no give as you leaned on it with some hesitation. You tested it a couple more times, then clambered on top of the cloud like a rowdy child. It held you up pretty well, sinking only a little under your weight.
"Are we ready to go, now?" Rainbow Dash remarked impatiently, now hovering above you with her hooves crossed.
"Looks like it. Let me get that for you," Twilight replied, her horn glowing. The rope around the cloud looped over itself a couple feet above your head, tightening into a knot with just enough length leftover for Rainbow Dash to clamp her teeth down on. A gust of air blasted over your head as the blue pegasus bolted into the sky, dragging you and the cloud behind her. You could see your knuckles whitening from the vice grip you had on the cloud, and your chest felt heavy as inertia pinned you to its surface. You imagined the experience would have only been more terrifying if you could actually see the ground. As you considered the appropriateness of silver lining puns, the cloud steadily decelerated, and you could hear Rainbow Dash's wings slowing down as the sound of rushing air subsided.
"Sorry if I scared you, Anon. Just wanted a little warm-up, you know? Just a short sprint," she spoke haughtily, dropping the rope beside you. You sat up on the cloud and briefly checked that your body was in one piece, and took a few deep breaths. Rainbow Dash's grin faltered a bit, and she moved to face you.
"I didn't actually scare you that bad, did I?" You pinched your finger and thumb together in response- just a little bit.
"You don't need to worry, though," Rainbow Dash reassured. "I won't let anything happen to you while we're up here. I'll even go slower for you, too." Acknowledging your nod of agreement, she gave you a short salute before speeding away towards a nearby patch of clouds.
She sailed straight through them, dispersing them with a barely-audible poof. You had barely registered the action when she banked toward another group of clouds, then another, and another. No matter their size, the sheer force of the air around her whizzing by completely removed any trace of the clouds. You hadn't paid it much attention when you were on the ground before, but the skies over Ponyville often seemed devoid of any cloud cover, save for the first time you saw it rain. After clearing out the nearby area, Rainbow Dash zoomed back towards the cloud and landed next to you. Her coat was dotted with droplets of water, and you curiously watch her shake the water out of her vibrant mane.
"You look like you've never seen somepony clear clouds before," she snickered, noticing your stare. You shook your head, bemused, earning a gasp from her. "Seriously? Humans don't control the weather where you're from? If the weather there's anything like Equestria, it's a wonder there are any of you left!" she exclaimed, absolutely dumbfounded. You shrugged, and gripped the cloud once again as Rainbow Dash picked up the rope and carried you towards the space over town. On the ground behind you, you could see the Fluttershy and Twilight still standing outside the cottage. You waved slowly as the distance between you grew, and just barely noticed their waves in return.
Later, you finished rolling up one last tiny cloud-ball in your hands, and gingerly placed it atop your cloud-man. Satisfied with your work, you searched the skies for a familiar rainbow-streaked blur. Rainbow Dash had finished her cloud-clearing minutes ago, and had been kind enough to leave a small one for you to mold and play with before practicing her Wonderbolts routine. Not that you weren't interested in watching her- keeping up with her was just a challenge. Even when she would fly head-on towards you, the pegasus was almost impossible to track, aside from the faint trail that followed her at high speeds. From the sound of it, the Wonderbolts were pretty similar to those fighter jet shows on Earth, although explaining such a concept to Rainbow Dash had been a fruitless endeavor; the closest thing to jets she knew of were machines akin to biplanes, and she had only half-disguised her disdain for them when she brought them up.
After a few seconds you spotted Rainbow Dash, rocketing high into the atmosphere above you. The trail behind her started to dissipate as she angled herself vertically, until she arced backwards into a stall. You felt strange watching her falling towards you; most of her tricks were at breakneck speeds faster than that. As she continued her descent, you noticed her wings had stopped moving and were limply hanging behind her, and you sprang to your feet on the cloud. Did she blackout from G-forces? Not enough oxygen? Your heart jumped into your throat as you braced yourself to catch her. The first day you had met Rainbow Dash, you'd managed to snag her out of controlled flight once, but from the height she was falling from, you had little faith in your reaction time-
"Sike!" Your body tensed up milliseconds before the pegasus' body reached you, only for her to whip away from you, perfectly horizontal. You could hear her distant laughter over the wind buffeting you. Seconds later, she returned to your cloud, still amused.
"Man, you should have seen your face," she guffawed. "You really thought I couldn't handle a few Gs? I'm no amateur, you know." You crossed your arms and sat down, unable to convey your annoyance by other means. You tried to imagine what Fluttershy would do in your situation, provided she didn't pass out in shock. Putting on your best attempt at parental disapproval, you calmly stared Rainbow Dash down. She stopped laughing, but kept her cheeky smile as she gave your shoulder a jab.
"Oh, don't look at me like that, Anon. I already told you I wouldn't let anything happen to you, right?" Much to her chagrin, you stood firm and unmoving, letting the awkward silence speak for you. She met your stare with some uncertainty, only to step away from you with a standoffish huff.
"Man, it's only been a few days since I last saw you, and Fluttershy's already gotten to you," Rainbow Dash complained. "Do you even do anything fun when you're at home with her?" You grunted in defense, and pulled out your whiteboard, gesturing towards her with them.
"Drawing? That's what you call fun?" she asked, resuming her usual cocky grin. "Is there any other 'fun' stuff you like to do?" You readied the marker in your hand, only to realize that you, in fact, didn't do much else. Your short time in Equestria so far had been spent sleeping, drawing, and doing manual labor.
"You don't do anything else for fun?" she pressed with a devious expression. "I heard from Pinkie Pie and Twilight that you're pretty close to Fluttershy, though." You folded your arms again as you gave her a questioning grunt in response. What was she getting at?
"I mean, Fluttershy's taken care of all sorts of animals, but not any like you before. I don't remember seeing any of them pet her before, either." Rainbow Dash's shift to a more playful tone sent a chill up the back of your neck. "Really makes a mare wonder, doesn't it?" She had the same expression on her face as she did when she stole Twilight's book from you the week before, and the way she slowly tiptoed around you was even more unnerving. You'd never done anything untoward to Fluttershy or any pony before, but you had difficulty maintaining a straight face under her impromptu interrogation as memories of the night before flashed in your mind. The mare picked up on your mild discomfort, and paused in front of you.
"Remember the first time we met? When you tried getting back Twilight's book that I stole away from you?" You cleared your throat and nodded, trying to regain your composure. "That was fun, playing keep away and running around..." She shot you a sidelong glance as she stopped mid-sentence to stretch her toned wings, as if showing off. They were about the same size as Fluttershy's, but were less fluffy and much more sleek. You would have been tempted to ask permission to touch them, had the topic of conversation been different.
"Then there was the part you caught me..." Rainbow Dash's voiced trailed off as she made eye contact with you. Her expression had softened, like she was revisiting a fond memory. "You were so gentle then... do you remember what I said to you when we were on the ground, all close together and stuff?" You became suddenly aware of Rainbow Dash inching towards your face, stopping short enough for you to make out some of the details in her magenta-colored eyes. You could even make out the sound of her steady breathing over the gentle breeze washing over you. The image from that day, of her nervous smile quickly looking away from yours as you held her up, was crystal clear in your mind. You had little issue refusing her offer then, but if the same circumstances happened again, you weren't so cer-
"I said 'I was just teasing,'" she whispered.
Her mouth contorted as she tried not to laugh, while you briefly considered jumping off of the cloud. Full blush, heart pounding, sweaty palms- you realized just how insane your reaction, as a human, was to the past thirty seconds of being led on by a three-and-a-half foot tall pegasus. Combined with the night before, you were legitimately worried if you had started losing your mind. What was worse, you became vividly aware of the sweat forming beneath the choker on your neck, the one that recorded your actions and emotions. You turned your head absentmindedly towards the edge of the cloud. Seconds passed as you contemplated whether or not you were in some sort of fever dream.
"H-hey! Anon! It was just a joke, I promise!" You felt Rainbow Dash's warm hoof direct your attention back to her now concerned smile. "And not even entirely a joke, anyway." You searched her face for any sign she was pressing any further, but she seemed genuine this time.
"Lemme explain. I, uh, overheard about your run-in with Lyra yesterday," she continued, backing up from you and sitting down. "Well, more like she was freaking out to everypony over 'the new human' who had come into town, and I heard her during my lunch break." You followed her glance towards your hands, which you were casually wiping off on your jeans.
"She wouldn't stop talking about your hands, a-and how jealous she was of Fluttershy. It got pretty annoying, actually." One of Rainbow Dash's wings shifted slightly as she spoke. "But I'll be honest, it got me thinking about them, too. Like, a lot. It probably sounds really weird, since I'm a pony and you're not, and you've only been here a few days, and-" You stopped her rambling with a raised hand, and simply shook your head.
Ponies' fascination towards (or fear of) you was expected at this point. You were an alien creature to ponies, and the feeling was mutual, more or less. Why most the ponies you'd met so far were drawn to your hands, though, you weren't entirely sure. Still, you sympathized with the mare, and offered your hand, palm-up, towards her. Rainbow Dash glanced apprehensively between you and your hand while simultaneously raising her hoof towards you, and daintily grazed your fingertips, sliding down towards your palm and rubbing around it in small circles. Every now and again, you could feel the tickling, velvet-like surface of her hoof grasp the different features of your palm- the knuckles, the heel, and everywhere else. You lost track of time as you both sat silently atop the cloud, letting her feel your hands, even occasionally gripping and feeling her hooves yourself.
Eventually, Rainbow Dash withdrew her hooves, and stared at the cloud surface beneath her. You lowered your head just enough to catch her attention, but she only cleared her throat and lowered her head further in kind. She looked... expectant. You couldn't quite place what she wanted, and so leaned down farther.
"C'mon, just do it already, Anon." she grumbled. She adjusted her wings again and sighed as she inched the crown of her head forward. You quickly realized that she was offering it to you. Your hand practically lifted of its own volition to oblige her, but she suddenly snapped back up with a loud groan before it reached its rainbow-colored target.
"Ugh! I want to try, but I feel like... like a pet!" she exclaimed. You couldn't hold back a wry chuckle, and adjusted your choker with exaggerated movements. She didn't respond. After a moment of quick thinking, you reached for one of her forelegs. She yelped in surprise but left her leg slack, allowing you to lean forward and bring her hoof to your own head. The heat radiating through your hair to your scalp was a strange sensation, but you still encouraged her to run her hoof along your head. You hadn't considered being on the receiving end of the gesture before. Rainbow Dash humored you for a short while, before giggling and lifting your head up by your chin.
"I'm not gonna lie, that was weird. But not as weird as I thought." She closed her eyes as she spoke, and you seized your moment to strike. You quickly plopped a hand atop her head, and started running your fingers through her smooth, thin mane. You paused as you heard the mare whine, self-conscious, yet felt her push back against your palm.
"You... don't have to stop." Taking her half-hearted suggestion as an order, you moved to sit beside her and continued combing through her short-cropped mane. For a brief moment, you found it unfortunate that there wasn't much hair to feel, compared to Fluttershy. Still, Rainbow Dash seemed just as receptive to your touch, especially when you started to scratch behind her ears. She occasionally mumbled to herself and hid her face from your curious eyes, but clearly enjoyed the sensation nonetheless. In moments, however, you noticed her start to tremble, first in her wings and progressing through her whole body. You moved back just in time for her wings to unfurl and send her several feet into the air above you.
"B-break's over! I need to keep practicing my routine!" she laughed nervously, attempting to wipe the vivid blush from her face. "I'll be back in a little while!" She took off into the distance without waiting for your response, leaving you with a familiar tightness in your chest.
The remaining part of your morning was completely devoid of Rainbow Dash's pranks and teasing. You made an entire army of tiny cloud men to keep you company, and Rainbow Dash continued practicing her routine. Eventually, the afternoon rolled by, and you shared a quick lunch with Rainbow Dash that she picked up from town. You weren't surprised to find that she ate considerably more than you, given her regular, vigorous exercise. You both spent her practice breaks in relative silence, occasionally interrupted by her asking a question about you and what you thought about ponies, Equestria, and the like. Honestly, you didn't know how you were supposed to feel; everything seemed like some extended dream that you couldn't wake up from, yet you were motivated to make the best of it all. She seemed to understand how you felt from your simple doodles and pantomime, though, or did a good job of pretending she did. Once she was satisfied with her progress for the day, Rainbow Dash settled herself onto your cloud and sprawled out beside you. You pointed out the wispy cirrus clouds floating high above you, wondering if she had more work to do.
"Those? Nah, those are too high to worry about. I'd freeze if I tried going that far up," she mumbled, stretching her limbs out dramatically with a yawn. Tempted by the idea of a nap, you copied her position and spread yourself out on the cloud's surface. You scooted toward the center to avoid any chance of falling off it, bumping gently into Rainbow Dash's side. No reaction. You craned your neck forward to see that she had instantly dozed off, her face half-buried into a bunched-up area of the cloud. The urge to draw her close to you arose in the back of your mind, but you resisted; while you may have shared a moment of bonding before, Rainbow Dash clearly wasn't as accustomed to touch as Fluttershy was, and you didn't feel like pushing your luck.
"Hey, Anon! Rainbow Dash! Is that you?" Twilight's voice called out from below you. Rainbow Dash let out a low groan, and completely buried her face into the cloud. Within seconds, you saw the lavender alicorn rise up and land onto the cloud.
"Mm mmmf mmmf mmf, mmmmf," Rainbow Dash grumbled, muffled by the cloud.
"What was that?" Twilight asked with amusement.
"I said, 'I literally just fell asleep, Twilight,'" the pegasus replied, lifting her head up for a moment to speak before letting it fall back into the cloud with a pomf.
"Right. Well, I thought it was a good time to take Anon home for the day."
"Wait, already!?" Rainbow Dash's head bolted upright. "What time is it?"
"About three-thirty." You watched Rainbow Dash think for several seconds before hanging her head in disappointment. "Don't worry, you'll get plenty of time to spend with him on your day off," Twilight added in a sing-song voice.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Oh, nothing, nothing at all." Twilight winked at you briefly before enveloping the cloud with her magic. "If you need to rest, you're welcome to head home. I'll take Anon back to the cottage myself." Rainbow Dash opened her mouth to protest, but withheld her reply. After saying her goodbyes, she took off towards town, leaving you and Twilight on the cloud alone. You felt wind brush past your face as the cloud slowly descended towards the Everfree forest, and stood up next to Twilight.
"So, did you have a good day, Anon?" she asked with a cheerful smile. You grunted in agreement. "Good, good. I was originally worried about how things would go between you and Rainbow Dash, but I can tell that you both had a good time." She kept facing forward as she spoke, not focused on guiding the cloud, but apparently on something else.
"You know, Celestia originally suggested that I should follow you around with everypony else?" Twilight added. "She figured that it would be better for me to be present to help study human behavior better. Personally, though, I think that choker works perfectly." She met your stunned look, closing her eyes and smiling genuinely.
"I only intend on reporting the important things, though, so don't worry. Not that you have anything to worry about, that is," she mused. "There's nothing wrong with acquainting oneself with others through physical contact, right?" You wanted to agree with Twilight and ignore her perfectly reasonable excuse for her continued spying. But deep down, part of you still questioned her enthusiasm. Twilight's attitude towards you had shifted dramatically since the first day you showed up, from wary and almost threatening to relaxed and trusting, yet just then she had admitted that she was still observing your every move. You unclasped the choker from your neck and examined the gemstone in thought.
"Speaking frankly, I wouldn't be heartbroken if you chose not to wear it anymore. But that would mean I'd have to get data from everypony by myself, and you can imagine how difficult that would be." Twilight turned towards you as she spoke, looking more serious than before. "I know I don't really seem like the most trustworthy pony to you right this moment, but could I ask you to keep wearing it for now?" You raised an eyebrow and gave her a questioning look- the most pressing thought on your mind was 'why?'
"I can't exactly explain why I need you to keep wearing that choker, but I promise you, it's not just for my own self-gratification. There's something I'd like to find out for the other princesses, and I need your help to do it. Does that make sense?"
You glanced at the choker and back to Twilight, recalling the initial goal you set when you started living with Fluttershy. You wanted to convince Princess Celestia that you were more than the danger she expected you to be, and Twilight's research was key to meeting that goal. Getting to leave to cottage with the Elements was certainly a privilege, but it wasn't the freedom you wanted. That would likely come with time, and allowing Twilight to observe you--for whatever purpose that held--just seemed like the right decision to make. You returned the choker to its home around your neck and nodded sagely to Twilight, who returned the gesture.
"I'm glad you understand, Anon. If everything goes the way I think it will, it'll make more sense, soon enough." |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 9 - Day 7 | "D'awww, look at you two. You've become like two peas in a pod, and in such a short time, too." Fluttershy's soothing voice sailed down from the staircase, gently lifting you from your slumber. You were immediately aware of a light, warm weight on your stomach. You barely opened your eyes to see Angel sleeping peacefully, curled up with his face burrowed into a bunched-up section of your shirt. Having to return to your usual spot on the couch downstairs had been pretty disappointing, but seeing Angel continue warming up to you was a pleasant surprise.
"You're more than welcome to go back to sleep, Anon," Fluttershy whispered as she approached the chair behind you. "It's still early. I just woke up, and wanted to watch the sunrise." You nodded slowly, and closed your eyes. Sleep was tempting, but you instead willed yourself to stay awake, thinking about your plans for the day.
Twilight had mentioned when she took you home that she intended on visiting Rarity, who had been busy studying your "edited" diagrams of human fashion since she returned to Ponyville. Hearing much was exciting- the wait to hear back from Twilight and Fluttershy's friend was less so. Still, a new change of clothes would be fantastic, if not just spare undergarments, would be well worth your patience, provided you didn't have any drastic wardrobe malfunctions between now and then. You imagined what Fluttershy's reaction to that kind of situation might be, and stifled the laugh that rose up in your chest. It was even more amusing to think about when you considered ponies didn't seem to wear clothes often. You recalled seeing a few mares wearing various garments and accessories when you visited Pinkie Pie, but they didn't appear inclined nor opposed to however much one another were wearing. That a renowned seamstress would live in a town nearly devoid of a fashion scene, full of ponies without much obvious concern for clothing, definitely struck you as odd.
Eventually, your curiosity got the better of you, and you looked around for your whiteboard, on the table next to the staircase where you had left it the previous night. You carefully scooped up Angel from your stomach and got up to lay him down into his own bed. He whimpered when the cool living room air surrounded him, but let out a sigh of content once you tucked him in.
"I never thought I'd see the day when Angel would let somepony other than me tuck him in," Fluttershy commented. You turned to see her relaxing in her chair, watching you with an almost motherly smile. "It's wonderful to see that he's so comfortable with you now. He won't even let most ponies touch him, especially when he's only just met them." You shrugged sheepishly- you couldn't remember if you had been good with animals before you came to Equestria, but if a tiny, sassy bunny would befriend you before anyone else, there was probably something about you that he preferred over ponies that weren't Fluttershy.
Once you retrieved your whiteboard, you sat back down on the couch and started drawing. You wanted to know more about Rarity, and showed Fluttershy your doodle of a needle, some thread, and a nondescript silhouette of a unicorn, along with a few question marks. Fluttershy studied your drawings for several seconds, unsure of how to respond. You quickly drew her silhouette next to the unicorn's, with tiny hearts above both of them.
"Oh, oh, are you wanting to talk about Rarity?" she asked eagerly. You nodded, and saw Fluttershy gently pump her hoof to herself with a hushed yes!.
"Okay, let's see. I showed you where she lives a couple days ago, and I told you what she does for a living, what else is there to say? I know that's she's lived in Ponyville most of her life, although she's always talking about how lovely Canterlot is. I've never really asked, but I think the reason she stays here is that she wants to stay with her friends that live here, too." Such a simple, heartwarming reason put a smile on your face.
"Ah! Not only is she my friend, she represents the Element of Generosity. She holds herself to a pretty high standard, but she always puts the needs of others first, even if it means getting dirty. That's probably the one thing she dislikes the most," Fluttershy explained, giggling softly at the end of her thought. "I don't like seeing her distressed, but her reaction to getting dirty can be a teensy tiny bit funny. Sometimes. Don't judge her on that, though, she's still a very professional pony that I think you'd get along with well."
As beams of morning sunlight stretched across the living room floor, you thought about how interesting meeting Rarity would be. You didn't feel like asking any more questions, as hearing responses from the mare herself sounded like a better idea than getting them second-hand. Instead, you spent the rest of the early morning practicing your drawing while accompanied by Fluttershy, who moved over to the couch to watch. A breakfast of fruit and nuts soon followed, and you eventually grew bored of drawing. You remembered the birdhouses you worked on with Fluttershy, and expressed your interest in making more, only to be politely dissuaded by her.
"I'm sorry, Anon, but I think we may have actually made too many birdhouses before. I finished taking the rest to ponies in town yesterday, and I still have a few extras, even after putting ones nopony wanted up in public areas," she murmured. "Besides, I was planning to tend to the garden today, anyway. You're more than welcome to join me, if you'd like." You nearly jumped at the opportunity to do something productive when Rainbow Dash's words from before sprang forth in your mind.
'You don't do anything else for fun?'
You had quickly gotten over her teasing before, but those words struck home- you didn't really do much other than work around the cottage and draw. You hesitated to respond to Fluttershy, and just as you were going to oblige, she put a hoof of your thigh, stopping you.
"You know, you don't have to come out and work with me, if you don't want to. I certainly appreciate the help, but you're not obligated to do every little chore around the cottage." Her words, while genuine, didn't help solve your problem. Still, you couldn't bear to argue with her when she was trying to be kind to you. You left her to her work and plopped down onto the couch once more with a sigh. A few short tugs on the cuff of your jeans startled you, and you looked down to see Angel staring up at you with his arms outstretched. You lowered your palm down to the floor and lifted him up to your eye level. He made a throwing motion with both hands and pointed towards his basket bed. On the floor beside it sat a red rubber ball, no wider than your thumb. You figured anything was better than just sitting around doing nothing, and scooted down onto the floor to play with him. What you weren't prepared for, as you watched him scamper over and snatch up the ball in his paws, was just how competitive Angel could be. He lifted the ball over his head and hurled it towards the ground, sending it flying towards your face. You managed to duck out of the way in time and let it careen into several objects in the room. It was unbelievably bouncy, and you were certain even Fluttershy could hear its rapid collisions--ponk ponk ponk ponk--outside. In one swoop, you deftly snatched it out of the air, and looked nervously towards Angel to take your turn. You gave the rubber ball a light, underhanded toss, sending it pattering across the floor to its unamused receiver. Angel smiled devilishly, and wound up his arm for another go, this time aimed directly at you. Minutes later, a few knocks on the front door interrupted your impromptu dodgeball match. You counted your blessings as you rose to answer it.
"Hey Anon, how are- a-are you okay, Anon? What are those welts on your face from?
Carousel Boutique looked much flashier up close than it did when you saw it for the first time; 'posh' couldn't even begin to describe it. Twilight stepped to the side of the front door and used her magic to open it for you, ushering you inside. You were dumbfounded by the elegant and vividly purple interior, full of dress displays, mirrors, and even a small stage. On that stage was what looked like a completely white mannequin donning ordinary clothing. What really set the mannequin apart from the rest in the room, though, was the fact that it was distinctly human in shape. You felt strangely drawn to it, not sure how or why it looked so realistic.
"Hello? Is that you, Twilight?" you heard a voice call from beyond a door across the room. The sound of hoofsteps echoed through the boutique, and out emerged a porcelain-white unicorn sporting a luxurious, indigo-colored mane. "And you've brought Ponyville's newest wonder, perfect."
"'Where did you hear that from, Rarity?" Twilight snorted. A newspaper cloaked in light-blue magic hovered up to the two of you as Rarity trotted over to greet you.
"Local media, of course! The paparazzi are absolutely ablaze with curiosity as to who and what our guest is," Rarity replied, lowering the newspaper and facing you. "And where are my manners? My name is Rarity, Twilight's friend and owner of this establishment. You must be the dear Mr. Anon Twilight has told me so much about." You felt the compulsory urge to bow and offer your hand to the mare, in which she placed her hoof with a light chuckle.
"Now who taught you how to properly greet a mare?" she complimented, bowing her head in kind.
"It wasn't me, I can say that much. Was it Fluttershy?" Twilight asked. You released Rarity's hoof and shrugged, ignoring the headache building in your temples. It had been more instinct than anything else, you didn't remember ever being taught.
"I suppose it's a mystery to everyone here, then. In either case, I'd like to take a few measurements, if you're comfortable with it, Mr. Anon." You nodded in approval, and followed her up to the stage where the mannequin stood. Multiple objects floated into the air around you- measuring tape, a clipboard, a pencil, and a small leather-bound book.
"Nopony else has seen that book, right?" Twilight asked, a hint of worry rising in her voice. You assumed it was one of the copies Twilight mentioned of your edits to Celestia's original notes on humans.
"Certainly not. I usually keep it upstairs when I'm working on orders, but I do take it out on occasion to study when I have the time. Anon--may I call you Anon?--hold your chin up for me, darling." Rarity watched carefully as the tape wrapped around your neck just above your choker, and scribbled onto the clipboard. "Next, please hold your arms out to your side." You did as you were instructed, observing the mare as she paced around you to study your body and measure your arms.
"Your drawings weren't far from their mark, it seems. Are you an artist, perhaps?" she inquired, floating the tape around the barrel of your chest while scanning one of the book's pages. She paused at your silence for a moment, before suddenly putting a hoof on her forehead in realization. "How rude of me, I forgot that you're not able to speak! My sincerest apologies." You shook your head and hummed reassuringly as the measuring tape wrapped around your waist.
"I don't know about him being an artist, but he is pretty talented at drawing," Twilight interjected. "Most of the time, he carries around a whiteboard and marker Fluttershy gave him, and he gets by pretty well without being able to talk."
"You don't say? I should like to see your talent for myself sometime. Maybe you could spend some time drawing me, if you'd like," Rarity hinted with a playful wink. You cursed your rice paper-thin composure as you felt blood rush to your face. The mare chuckled again, and returned to her measurements. "I'm only joking, I assure you. If you would spread your legs, please." You knew what she meant, but that didn't stop your body from stiffening immediately as in a knee-jerk reaction. Rarity made eye contact with you as the measuring tape snaked up your leg, still smiling.
"Don't worry, darling, I'm only measuring your inseam. This will be but a moment, and then you'll be finished, alright?" You maintained eye contact with Rarity for several quiet seconds, neither of you flinching the entire time. You nodded slowly, and widened your stance, allowing the tape to reach the edge of your crotch for mere seconds before it floated away. "See? Not so bad, now was it?"
"So tell me, what are ponies saying about Anon, all hype notwithstanding?" Twilight asked, skimming over the newspaper.
"Well, most of what I've heard in my short time home seems to be somewhat neutral. A few ponies are worried, but given that he was seen with Fluttershy, nopony seems terribly concerned about him. A certain... eccentric mare, in fact, seems quite enamored with him." Instantly, you knew from Rarity's comment exactly who she was referring to.
"Do you mean Lyra? Fluttershy mentioned that before."
"The one and only. But you should know, Anon, she's not the only one interested in you," Rarity replied, a curious tone overtaking her voice. She glanced up at you with her azure eyes and smiled at you coyly. "Twilight has told me that you exhibit pretty extreme strength compared to most stallions, but you are still capable of a gentle touch. A mare such as myself could certainly use someone like that around here, as most of my work is done alone-"
"Rarity!" gasped Twilight, who noticed your face steadily tilting towards the floor. Rarity laughed heartily and waved her hoof at you and Twilight.
"I'm talking about sewing, darling, sewing! Perhaps double entendre is best suited after one's first meeting, hm? I'm sorry if I offended you." After yesterday's events, you were steadily starting to wonder if this was the norm in Ponyville. It probably wasn't the best assumption to make, having lived there for only a week, but you hoped it wasn't true.
"Anyway, what I'm offering is a potential apprenticeship opportunity here at Carousel Boutique, should you be interested in taking up an occupation in the future. I imagine your- what were they called again? Fingers? I imagine your fingers would be well suited to working with cloth, but you would require training first, and time is not a luxury I have much of at the moment. At the very least, I could teach you how to assemble your own wardrobe, seeing as you are more familiar with human clothing as I am. You would be more than welcome to work at your own pace whilst I attend to the backlog of orders I received in my absence. After I see your work, we could decide where you want to move on from there. What do you think?"
Frankly, Rarity's offer shocked you more than anything else. Sure, it was a lovely gesture, but to offer a chance like that to a completely alien creature that she had only just met? You rested your elbow in your other hand and held your face in disbelief. You needed clarification, to make sure that she understood the situation. You gestured the number one to both ponies, pointing to it, then to your wrist, as if pointing at a watch, to yourself, and finally to Rarity. You've only known me for a day.
"Once? Yes, I've only met you once, what of it?" Rarity asked. "I trust in Twilight's word, don't you?" You shook your head, and gestured with both hands to your entire body, then Twilight's. You waved your arm broadly to the room, and ended by pointing to yourself. You were distinctly different than every other living creature here, and yet she would trust you with this?
"If you're referring to how you're not a pony, I'm not worried about that, either. I trust that you don't mean me or anypony else harm, you said so yourself in Twilight's notes." She levitated the book into your hands, open to the section regarding normal human attitudes and behavior. You couldn't vouch for every human when you were editing the book with Fluttershy, but you still believed that humans were peaceful at heart. "As for the apprenticeship, I don't mind taking some time to teach you how to fend for yourself. Don't think of it as a favor, everypony really should know how to maintain their own clothing, whether or not they choose to wear it."
At that moment, Fluttershy's words from that morning came to mind. Rarity was the 'Element of Generosity,' she had said. The whole Element business still didn't make much sense to you, but it was clear why Rarity had gotten her title. You let your arms hang to your sides and looked at her in amazement. If you could have spoken then, you would have likely given a thorough speech to express your unbelievable gratitude to her, and how lucky you were to have met. You kept that in mind and gave her a deep, solemn bow, even moving one arm across your body with the other in the air behind you.
"Am I to assume that's a 'yes,' then?" Rarity asked, raising a hoof to her bemused face. You quickly nodded, still bowing. "Right. In that case, we should schedule a time to get started! How does this Saturday sound? I'll be busy most of this week, but weekends are perfect for me to catch up on old side projects and clean up the place." You nearly agreed with her plan, until you suddenly remembered your prior engagement with Apple Bloom and stood up quickly. In one fluid motion, you slipped your whiteboard and marker out of your pockets and started scribbling her cutie mark, as well as a makeshift shed and a hammer with nails. Upon showing her your drawing, Rarity's eyes widened in surprise.
"Why, that's Apple Bloom's cutie mark! And is that supposed to be the clubhouse she shares with Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo?" she said, perplexed. You nodded, and pointed to the hammer and nails. "You plan to work on it with them, then? That's very sweet of you, Anon. In that case, how about Sunday?" You took a moment to think, and agreed with a grunt, confident that you didn't have any plans for that day. Before Rarity could speak, however, Twilight cleared her throat, garnering the attention of the two of you.
"Actually, Rarity, I was hoping to take some time to speak with Anon privately on Sunday, with Celestia," she argued. "Sorry to butt in at the last moment, but it's pretty important."
"Oh, no problem at all, darling. I'll see what I can do about fitting Anon into my schedule later on, then, and we'll take it from there. How does that sound?"
"I think that will work just fine. Is that okay with you, Anon?" Twilight answered. Tired of nodding your head so frequently, you simply gave Twilight a thumbs-up in approval.
"So it's all settled, then! Now, about those measurements..."
Cool evening air washed over you as you and Twilight stepped out of Carousel Boutique and waved farewell to Rarity. She had spent a surprising amount of time telling stories about her recent trip to Manehattan, while simultaneously starting on your first set of clothes, which consisted of a simple collared shirt and a pair of slacks. She was practically overjoyed when you showed keen interest in watching her work on an unfinished order, and practically begged for you stay a bit longer afterward while she made her first attempts at creating human clothing. Twilight, confident that she was not needed back home nor by the princesses, opted to stay with you and follow along as well. While Rarity had politely asked to see your shirt--without you in it--as reference, she had been considerate enough to let you keep your jeans on. Something about helping you 'retain your dignity,' which lead into her first tale about a designer whose newest clothing line severely lacked that quality. You were pleased to find that hearing her talk for hours on end hadn't gotten on your nerves in the slightest. Not that you minded a lot of talking, but you were grateful that she was nothing like Pinkie Pie and actually took moments to breathe between sentences.
Twilight insisted on personally escorting you home, and set a calm pace as you carried your old clothes in a neat, folded stack. The cotton dress shirt Rarity had 'thrown together at the last minute' fit astonishingly well, and while your new slacks had required some tweaking to fit around the waist area, they were much more comfortable to walk around in than your thick jeans. You were considerably happier at having new clothes than you had anticipated, and felt like running around in excitement. That is, if you weren't at risk of scaring any of the scattered bystanders that were still out.
"You're positively beaming, Anon. I'll bet it's nice to finally have something new to wear," Twilight remarked, chuckling. "I'm glad to see you enjoyed meeting Rarity today." You hummed in agreement. Both of you continued quietly to Fluttershy's cottage, and after Twilight briefly reminded you of your upcoming meeting with Celestia, you went your separate ways once you reached the bridge that crossed the nearby creek. You had hoped that she would have explained the meeting a bit more, but she avoided the topic at the boutique when Rarity had brought it back up. You pushed the thought aside as you entered the cottage, devoid of any sound aside from the ticking of the clock above the kitchen doorway. You tossed your clothes gently onto the couch, and tiptoed upstairs to see if Fluttershy was home. No luck there. You checked the kitchen and the garden out back as well, but there seemed to be no sign of her anywhere. On your way back in, you noticed that the fireplace had fresh, unlit logs inside, likely in anticipation of a late arrival. It wouldn't have been the first time she had been out late, likely tending to some animal's needs. You weren't hungry enough to want dinner right away, and decided to wash your clothes after a good bath. You rolled off your socks and started unbuttoning your shirt as you backed into the bathroom.
"Waugh!" Fluttershy squealed, startled by your entrance. You could hear the sound of splashing water as she sat up in the bathtub. You instantly jumped out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind you. The brief image you caught of her sitting in the tub, her slick mane framing her surprised expression, was burned in the forefront of your mind.
"Anon? Y-you can come in, if you'd like," you heard her weakly call through the door. "Although, you'll have to wait to use the bath... since I'm in it, and all." You hesitated to reopen the door until you remembered one crucial fact: ponies were almost ALWAYS nude. As far as she was concerned, you had nothing to worry about. You laughed meekly to yourself as you turned the doorknob, slowly cracking open the door and peeking inside to make sure she was prepared. Fluttershy laid herself back into the tub and sighed, with only her face peering out from the water's surface.
"I'm sorry for startling you just now, I didn't hear you come in at all. I've just been in here, relaxing," she explained. "I didn't expect you to be out so late, did you have a good time at Rarity's shop?" You pulled up a footstool and grunted your affirmation as you sat down.
"That's good. I really like your new clothes, by the way. She does such great work. I remember one of the best dresses she ever made for me to wear to the Grand Galloping Gala. Have I ever told you about that?" You shook your head, and listened intently to her as you washed your t-shirt.
"... and not a single one of the animals wanted to play, or talk, or even be near me! It was really frustrating." You absentmindedly nodded your head as you brazenly took off your slacks and dipped them into your washing bucket. You had barely started scrubbing when you noticed the growing silence in the room. You turned your head towards Fluttershy in mild confusion, who made brief eye contact with you before quickly diverting her gaze towards the ceiling.
"A-and I eventually ended up losing my temper, which only made the situation worse." You returned to your washing, and waited for Fluttershy to continue. Yet again, silence. You paused and glanced over at the mare again. Immediately, she hummed tunelessly to herself and closed her eyes. A blush spread across your face as you imitated washing your clothes while keeping your eye on her, waiting for her to look at you again. Slowly but surely, one of her eyes peeked out over the edge of the tub at you, and you thrust an accusatory finger in her direction.
"I-I'm sorry, Anon, I didn't mean to bother you by staring," Fluttershy mused, sinking deeper into the tub. "I-I didn't actually think it would bother you, but I'll stop, now." She sounded almost heartbroken, and you lowered your hand to your lap.
In her defense, she probably didn't mean anything by it. You did your best not to think about it often, but the main reason you had assumed ponies didn't wear clothing and were comfortable being nude was the fact that they didn't really have anything to hide. Only on rare occasions did you catch yourself staring at ponies' bodies, something you felt equally ashamed and confused about. By the way they acted, Fluttershy, her friends, most of the ponies you'd seen so far acted like everyday adults. No matter how hard you tried, though, you couldn't shake off the wholesome, almost child-like auras many of them gave off, especially Fluttershy. Sure, there wasn't necessarily anything inappropriate to look at--her posterior, like all ponies, was completely smooth, like they were out of a cartoon--but you still felt wrong all the same. This confused you even more when you considered the fact that bathrooms were as common in Ponyville as you imagined they were on Earth.
"Anon...?" Fluttershy's question pulled you out of your thought, and you looked back to see her still facing the ceiling. She opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated for several seconds before taking a deep breath and looking you dead in your eyes with an equally scared and strangely invigorated expression.
"Anon, you don't have to answer this, and I know you can't speak and all, but it's been bothering me for a while now, and Ireallydon'twanttoupsetyoubutatthesametime-" Fluttershy rambled. Her voice grew ever higher, and several seconds passed before you eventually waved your hands in circles to snap her out of it, gesturing for her to move on. She sighed, and lifted herself to her hooves in the tub, her mane and tail hanging from her body like sleek, pink curtains.
"Alright, tell me... what do you think about ponies? Specifically, about how they look?" Your jaw dropped a bit as you registered her question. How likely was it was that she had been on the same train of thought as you were just moments ago? The only reaction you could muster was a slow, uncertain shrug.
"Ah, that was a pretty vague question. Let me try this: you don't dislike how ponies look, do you? Even if they're not wearing clothing?" You shook your head. Was it strange? Certainly. Had you gotten used to it? Almost. But it was something that really bothered you, especially if you thought hard about it. Life was generally less uncomfortable if you didn't.
"Okay, so then... do you, maybe, like how ponies look?" Somehow, the way she spoke, you felt like her second question was even more loaded than the first. "A-and I don't mean just me, I mean anypony, like Twilight, or Rainbow Dash, or..." she mumbled, trailing off. She looked like she was blushing as hard as you were, although you thought that could have been caused by the bath. If you were being honest, ponies weren't exactly unattractive; you had, of course, been face-to-face with one multiple times in the last week, once literally, without much thought against the matter. But you realized that she didn't know that. Your experience with her two days prior, and those with Rainbow Dash- all of those didn't exist in her mind. She really had no idea how you felt about ponies, but then again, neither did you. All you felt right now was confusion and frustration, with little means of expressing it. Her desperate eyes watched you without mercy, waiting for your answer, before she realized that it wouldn't come. She realized that she had verbally backed you into a corner.
"Oh, that's... right. You can't really answer more than yes or no questions. Seems like I got carried away," she mumbled, trying to play off her embarrassment with a smile. "But, who am I kidding? I mean, you'd clearly be interested in humans, right? You haven't even been here that long, and it wouldn't make sense, anyway." She tried talking away her self-consciousness, but between hiding her face with her soaked mane and eventually reducing her voice to a hush, you weren't able to understand what she was saying. Your only effort to console her was to get up and bring her a towel as she lifted herself over the edge of the tub and onto the bathmat. Your heart shattered as you watched her accept it with a forced smile, and you left the pieces behind as you walked out of the bathroom to give her some privacy.
Not being able to speak had many inconveniences, but being unable to properly convey your thoughts and emotions easily was the hardest part to deal with. Frustrated, you sat down on the couch and grumbled unintelligible gibberish to the open air of the living room. Your lack of control over your own body to even complain only served to irritate you more as you raised your voice. Your temples began to ache, and before you realized it, you were back to standing, shouting in anger to nothing and nobody in particular. Not towards Fluttershy, or yourself, or Twilight and Celestia. Not even Discord, whose idol brought you to Equestria and put you in this mess in the first place. No, the bottled-up ire that came spilling out of your mouth was directed towards your situation, towards fate. It wasn't anyone's intention for you to be in Equestria, let alone unable to speak or write. You weren't completely helpless, thanks to Fluttershy's kindness and consideration, but your inability to return her gestures--or anyone's--in kind was a lot to bear. You threw that weight against the walls of the cottage as you screamed each incoherent syllable, the words threatening to tear it down around you.
Gradually, your outburst subsided, and you sat back down with a significantly raw throat and hurt dignity. Losing your temper had only reiterated The uncomfortable silence that followed was cut short by the quiet creaking sound of the bathroom door, opened by a very distraught Fluttershy with her mane wrapped up in a towel. You waved her over and took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as she walked out. She took timid steps towards you stopping to sit in the center of the living room carpet.
"Are you... angry with me, Anon?" she whispered, purposefully avoiding eye contact with you. You grunted and shook your head, certain of that much. You felt sorry about scaring her and potentially hurting her feelings, scooted over on the couch to offer her a seat as a gesture of apology. She remained on the carpet, unmoving.
"I know it must be a-awfully frustrating, hearing tough questions like that when you can't answer them, especially those kinds of questions," she stuttered solemnly, like she was committing herself to making a difficult decision. "But you don't h-have to worry about it happening again, I promise. I won't bother you, or myself with them. I'm sorry." It was obvious that she was trying to maintain a neutral expression, but the corners of her mouth quivered and her body trembled as she looked you dead in your eyes. Seeing her distressed made every fiber of your being want to apologize, to properly console her and tell her everything that was okay. The only appropriate response you were able to muster was to keep shaking your head, meeting her gaze as you felt your restraint slipping once more. In the minutes leading up to that apology, you thought you had let out all your pent-up worry, doubt, and stress that had crossed your mind. It wasn't until that moment that you felt the dam finally burst.
"Anon, you're crying... why are you crying?"
You ignored her question, simply letting your tears streak down your face as you continued to shake your head. You didn't sob, and your breathing was relatively still, and yet you cried anyway. Fluttershy rushed forward between your knees and looked up to you, eyes darting back and forth across her face. The only response you could possibly think of was to hold the side of her face as you wiped your own with the back of your hand. Her eyes widened at first, but closed slightly as she leaned into your touch. She rubbed her cheek against your palm for a moment, before looking back up at you with traces of a bittersweet smile forming on her face.
"Anon, I'm so sorry for pushing you this far-" You elicited a startled eep from Fluttershy as you cut off by gingerly bringing your forehead down against hers. You couldn't speak your mind properly and didn't have much control over your emotions, but by whatever deities existed in Equestria, you didn't want to hear her apologize again. You stared her down in silence, holding her head still with both of your hands. She opened her mouth to continue, but you pressed a finger to her lips- speaking wasn't necessary. At least, the apologies didn't need to be coming from her. Instead, you figured the best way you could remedy the situation was in the same manner she had when you first came to her cottage. You carefully unwrapped the towel surrounding her still-damp mane, and tenderly pulled the tips of your fingers through it.
"Hold... hold on a second. I'll be right back," Fluttershy interjected in a shaky voice. You wiped your face as she trotted back to the bathroom and carried out a small, pink-handled brush. She climbed onto the couch while you inspected the brush, and caught you off-guard by forcing her snout beneath your hands in your lap. You lifted your hands in time for her to push her way lay onto your lap, looking straight ahead with a determined yet nervous expression.
You held the brush against the crown of her head and started dragging it back through her mane, paying close attention to avoid snags as you carried the brush all the way through it. You could feel the resistance against the brush lessen with each stroke as the hair dried, and found difficulty in finding a good resting place for your free hand. Fluttershy noticed the errant movements of your hand over her, and guided it back to her face, tilting her head slightly so that you could comfortably fit your palm against it. Your breathing steadied in rhythm with the soothing pattern of brushing her mane and rubbing her cheek with your thumb in long slow strokes, and you could feel the tension in your body and hers diminishing with each motion. The only sounds in the room were the ticking of the clock and the faint swish of the brush as the two of you sat together on the couch, and you felt that you were both the closest to--and the farthest from--understanding one another as you had ever been. |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 10 - Day 8 pt. 1 | A ticklish, twitching sensation on your legs roused you from your unusually light rest, and you glanced at the clock in the near-pitch black living room. It was barely past three in the morning. You must have passed out while brushing Fluttershy, who was rolled over on her back and pressed into your stomach. You heard her mumble in her sleep, and her wings shifted underneath her seemingly in response. Without thinking, you ran your hand along her belly and up to her neck and back, earning a pleased sigh as her body moved to follow it. You would have never considered being in a position like this with Fluttershy--or anyone else, for that matter--when you first arrived, but by some strange series of events, there you were. What had started out as the relationship one would imagine someone and a newly adopted pet would have ended up escalating to a level beyond your expectations, mainly due to lack of proper communication and understanding. The few moments of touching and petting, you thought, were just Fluttershy's way of consoling you and building trust between the two of you, but it was just like Rainbow Dash had pointed out- Fluttershy had grown considerably closer to you than anyone, maybe even she herself, had anticipated.
You stopped moving your hand and ignored Fluttershy's sleepy, disappointed whine. What about Rainbow Dash? You had met with her all of, what, two times? You were worried that your misplaced affections for Fluttershy had spurred on your stranger interactions with Rainbow Dash, but after some thought realized that most of them originated from her own thoughts and feelings. It was bizarre to imagine that, in the span of a week, you had become subject to the infatuations of not one, but two ponies, despite being a human, a creature from an entirely different realm. Remembering your first trip into Ponyville and your meeting with Lyra, you seriously wondered if the two pegasi were the only ones.
Why was it, then, that you felt equally drawn to them? Perhaps you were deprived of affection just enough to be willing to accept any you could receive? If that were true, you imagined, Fluttershy's attention would certainly be more than enough; you weren't some predator looking to lead on as many potential suitors as possible.
"Keep going... please," Fluttershy grumbled sleepily, pawing at your hand and nudging it back and forth. You obliged, chuckling quietly as she stretched out her limbs to give you access to her whole underside. Feeling her soft, fuzzy coat beneath your fingers made you consider that perhaps your reciprocation to both pegasi wasn't out of depravity. Your intentions from the start were purely ambivalent, and still were to some extent. Unlike Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash was much more direct about her interest in you, despite the roundabout way she pursued it. You knew your caretaker to be rather subtle instead, unless she assumed she was dreaming, of course.
You sighed and focused your attention around a small puff of fur on Fluttershy's chest, massaging the area and the muscles where her forelegs met her body. You ultimately conceded that the details weren't important. You didn't recall any past experiences with crushes or infatuation, but you knew enough by heart to understand that there was still plenty to learn about Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and any others you would eventually meet while you were in Equestria. What bothered you then was how much time you would actually have to spend with them. Would the meeting with Celestia Twilight had mentioned be about sending you back to Earth? What about your memories?
Twilight's announcement had apparently come only when she felt it was necessary, in order to avoid overlapping with your first lesson from Rarity. She hadn't mentioned it prior, nor did she talk about it again after you both had left the boutique. Twilight didn't seem the type to forget about much, and given how frequently she seemed to communicate with the princesses, it was unlikely that it was just spur of the moment. No, you felt like she had purposefully avoided the topic until it was vital that you knew. Quite frankly, you had grown unnaturally accustomed to being left in the dark by Twilight so far. You recalled her request to keep wearing the choker without any tangible reason as to why she wanted you to except that she wanted to show something to the princesses. She originally wanted to use it to make sure you wouldn't hurt Fluttershy, and when Celestia saw that you meant no harm towards your caretaker, you were allowed to move about the town. You had agreed with Twilight in the hopes that you might further your goal of attaining your own freedom, but hopefully you would get some clearer answers from her and Celestia directly, when the time came.
The feeling of pins and needles from your legs falling asleep snatched away your focus. You hated to disturb Fluttershy, but you needed relief soon or you would never get back to sleep. You reached underneath her to lift her up, causing her to jump at the sensation of your cold hands.
"What are you doing, Anon?" she complained with a whisper. "Put me down, I was just getting comfy." You paused with the mare still held aloft in your hands. Your original plan was to bring her back upstairs to her own bed, but the feeling of cooler air washing over your legs dissuaded you. Instead, you swung your numb legs onto the couch one by one, and laid her wings-down on your abdomen. Satisfied with your decision, Fluttershy wiggled back and forth and sighed contentedly. You were warm, she was comfortable, and you could feel the blood-flow in your legs returning- a win-win situation, for sure. You laid your head back on the armrest, and focused solely on her warmth as you fell into a much deeper sleep.
When you awoke again, Fluttershy had already gotten up. Bread and chamomile flower heads sat on a small plate on the table next to the couch, as well as a pencil that didn't seem to belong there. You stuffed one of the buds into your mouth and picked up the pencil before starting your search for Fluttershy, who you easily found at the kitchen table, busy poring over a thin book. She didn't notice you quietly stepping into the dining room and peering curiously over her shoulder, and hummed while flipping a few pages. On closer inspection, it looked like a book meant to help teach children...
... how to write.
Across its pages were thin, widely-spaced horizontal lines, with dashed letters intended to be traced, along with extra space so the student could practice on their own. You looked down at the pencil in your hands, and felt a rush of emotion take hold of your body. The pencil clacked against the ground after you dropped it to wrap Fluttershy in a tight hug. The sudden touch startled her momentarily, but she leaned her head against yours as you squeezed tighter.
"Good morning, Anon. I thought you might be interested in this book," she cooed. "I found it earlier this morning in a chest of things I had when I was a little filly. To be honest, I don't know how I didn't think to look for it sooner, but after last night, I was inspired to see if I still had one." Her words barely registered in your mind, and it took some gentle prodding from Fluttershy to get you to let go.
"Take a deep breath, Anon. I know you're excited, but we should take this slow and steady, alright?" You disregarded Fluttershy's unintentional double entendre, dashing back into the living room to retrieve your breakfast before promptly sitting in the chair next to her. She cleared her throat and turned a few pages in the book until she reached one that was untouched.
"I know this might seem pretty childish to do, but it's worth trying, right?" she said with a hopeful smile. You nodded enthusiastically. "Okay. So, first, I'd like you to try tracing out this big M and little m. You can draw well, so I think this should be a good start." You gripped the pencil in your hand and pressed it to the dashed lines, tracing the uppercase M and lowercase m flawlessly. Piece of cake. You felt pretty silly for being so confident, but you figured setting the bar low was a good way to keep your motivation high.
"Now, go ahead and try copying the letters on the lines next to the first," Fluttershy instructed. To your surprise, you had to expend some mental effort to copy the first uppercase M, looking back and forth between it and your original for reference. Even though your traced version was directly beside it, remembering what M looked like was actually difficult, and each M you drew after wasn't any easier.
"Good! Let's see, cover up that whole line with your other hand, and try drawing a big M without looking back." You did as she asked, and that familiar feeling of dread washed over you the moment you brought your pencil to the blank lines on the paper. As usual, the image of the letter M wouldn't come to mind, despite the fact that you just knew what it was supposed to look like. It felt like your short-term memory was being overwritten, or that those brief moments of writing never happened. You hastily scribbled something with straight lines, to no avail.
"If you can't think of the letter itself, try thinking of what it would look like if it were a drawing," Fluttershy suggested. "Think of a big M as two tiny mountains, sitting next to each other. Just four lines, coming together at the top." You felt a sharp pain in your head, but you forced yourself to try and draw exactly what she described. You drew one peak, and finally a second, forming a recognizable M, albeit a wide one.
"Good job!" Fluttershy applauded you, beaming. "Do you want to try another?" Her expression fell when she noticed you gripping your head.
"Oh, maybe not. I'm glad that you were able to do it, but I don't want you to hurt yourself for my sake. These things take time, and you've got plenty of it to spare, right?" You shook your head vehemently and turned the page.
While the possibilities writing had for your relationship with Fluttershy and her friends were great, you pressed on for your own needs. You knew communication depended on mutually conveying information, and when it came down to it, you needed some form of communication that wasn't as limiting as art and acting. You grit your teeth and traced over the dashed Ns and repeated the process. Again, the tracing and copying were simple, but you struggled to get a smooth-looking letter written from memory alone. Fluttershy watched you endure the exercise for the better part of an hour, only stopping you on occasion to make sure you ate your breakfast and had something to drink. Your headache only continued to worsen, but your determination made ignoring the pain bearable.
"Anon, stop!" Twilight's muffled voice shouted.
Just when you thought you were starting to make headway, writing down your forty-third letter without reference, you heard Twilight's sudden outcry. Before you could turn around, your limbs went completely limp and you saw the room tilt to the side and rush up to meet you. Several disconcerting seconds passed as you realized that you had, in fact, collapsed onto the floor, rather than the other way around. Your headache was dissipating, but your vision and hearing were becoming hazy as well. Panic started to set in as two voices started shouting behind you, but you were unable to move. You stared ahead helplessly as you were lifted into the air and carried into the living room, where Twilight and Fluttershy's blurry silhouettes were waiting for you. Twilight's magic wrapped over your head, and after a brief period you slowly regained your vision and hearing. Fluttershy stood beside her, tapping her front hooves against the ground anxiously. Twilight fired a small bolt of magic at your neck, and only the feeling in your head and neck returned.
"Thank goodness, I got here in time. What happened, Fluttershy?" Twilight asked, walking over to inspect you.
"What do you mean? Nothing was happening until you came in and did... that to Anon!" Fluttershy asserted. "He was just practicing with a writing book I found for him."
"A writing book?"
"Yes, one I had saved from my time in school. We had a... situation last night, and I thought it would be a good idea for him to be able to speak his mind." Twilight stopped to think for a few seconds, and looked into your eyes as a doctor would when searching for a check-up.
"Is this true, Anon? You were just trying to write?" she inquired. You gave her a short nod and tilted your head towards the kitchen a few times. Twilight followed your gesture and brought the book back out to the living room. "How long was he doing this?"
"About an hour, I think?" Fluttershy answered. "But wait, Twilight, you still haven't answered my question! What happened to Anon that made you do this?"
"I incapacitated Anon because I thought he was going to die, Fluttershy," Twilight admitted with a serious tone, making you gasp.
"D-die?" Fluttershy's eyes widened, and if she could turn pale, you imagined she probably would have.
"With the gemstone in that choker I gave Anon, I can be notified if he's in danger. I had left my linked gemstone alone for a short while, and when I came back to check on it, it showed that he was still here but in immense, self-inflicted pain." Twilight turned to you and used her magic on the choker again, releasing you from your invisible binds. "I assumed the worst, and came as soon as I could, but I'm glad it wasn't anything obviously life-threatening."
"I had no idea that it was that bad for you, Anon," Fluttershy remarked. "I told you that you didn't need to push yourself, you've got time." You exchanged glances with Twilight, knowing that she was the only one who knew if that was actually true or not. She scrunched up her face and looked towards the floor, thinking hard.
"I thought I could wait until Sunday, but..." she grumbled to herself.
"What's happening Sunday?" Fluttershy asked curiously.
"Did Anon not tell you? I'll be taking him to meet with the princesses that day for a private meeting. I have a lot to report to them, especially to Celestia," Twilight explained. "I had a special permission I needed to ask about, but since I'm here I may as well ask you now. Anon-" You perked up as Twilight addressed you directly.
"Would you give me your consent to conduct research on you? In person?" You waited to exhale your held breath, and gestured with your hands for her to elaborate. "Remember what I said to you a few days ago, about how we know almost nothing about the effects being in Equestria has on humans? I want to pursue that directly, and take some preliminary measurements- nothing invasive, I promise. That information would be essential in helping find a way for you to communicate with us better without having to hurt yourself in the process." As tempting as Twilight's offer was, you were still apprehensive about her intent. Questioning the motives of small, cute ponies seemed to have become your newest hobby, as of late.
"Is there anything I can do to help?" Fluttershy interjected. "I don't want this to happen again, if I can avoid it." Despite the fact that you hadn't actually agreed yet, she sounded determined.
"Well, you're the one Anon's most familiar with, so he'd probably be much more comfortable having you around than if he was alone with me."
"I'd be more than happy to. It's the least I can do." You noticed Fluttershy's eyes glisten while she spoke, and she smiled at you reassuringly. What doubt you had in your mind about Twilight's research evaporated, and you stood up to give Twilight a confident nod.
The three of you walked across Ponyville to Twilight's 'Castle of Friendship," a giant, crystalline tree that you hadn't even imagined could exist. You hadn't noticed it when you were with Rainbow Dash, which was pretty surprising, given how dramatically it stood out from the surrounding hills and straw-covered abodes. Twilight led you and Fluttershy through its gleaming halls to an enormous library, which was completely empty aside from Spike, who was busy re-shelving books atop a tall ladder.
"Hey, you're back! What took you so long?" he remarked, sliding down the ladder and jogging over to meet you.
"You know, I was just thinking about that, too," Fluttershy added, making sure to stay beside you as all of you took a seat at one of the round library tables. "If you teleported yourself straight to my living room from here, why didn't you teleport all three of us back?"
"I didn't want to risk hurting Anon by teleporting him again," replied Twilight. Her horn glowed, and several scrolls, an inkwell, and four feather pens all materialized out of thin air and settled onto the desk neatly. "I've already been concerned about how Discord's artifact might have affected him, and I use my magic sparingly on him in the case that it might, as well. His choker is the only thing I know is safe to use." You nodded and politely signed your thanks to her.
"I get it. So, then, what about your research?"
"What I'm going to do is ask Anon to answer a few 'yes or no' questions, and see if he can solve some simple word puzzles." Twilight looked towards the shelves behind you, and you heard the sound of books shifting as she levitated several onto the table and opened one. You waited patiently as she instructed Fluttershy and Spike to help her copy the some of the open book's contents, observing the splendor of the library and its decor. The decorations, much like those you had seen in the hallways, were tree-themed. You weren't sure if they were in reference to the tree-like castle itself, or to something else; you would have to remind yourself to ask Twilight about it when you got the chance.
"Can he do mine first, Twilight?" Spike piped up.
"Certainly. You do have the easiest one, it would be a good start," Twilight replied, prompting Spike to slide his sheet and the remaining pen to you. "The goal of this one is simple, Anon. I just want you to identify the words that contain the letters A or B. You can just circle the words you think are correct." You looked down at the sheet, which listed twenty random words. You circled five: bread, plate, grass, farm, and hair. Given that you already knew how to read, it was an effortless test, but you went along with it anyway. The book Twilight had open was one intended for Equestrian psychiatrists. While Twilight scanned over your sheet for a moment, you noticed that it was open to a chapter regarding gauging a pony's ability to understand written language. You were unsurprised to see that the word English wasn't present, but instead replaced with 'Equuish.' Close enough.
"Nicely done. I'd assumed you could read, given that you can understand what we're saying," Twilight pointed out. "How's your sheet coming along, Fluttershy?" You looked over to the pegasus, who was methodically pressing and lifting the pen to the paper with her mouth. She had made almost half the progress Spike had, but with admirable penmanship for someone lacking hands or claws. She gently spat out the feather and smiled proudly.
"I'm not exactly that fast, but I'll be finished in just a little bit," Fluttershy murmured before picking the pen back up to finish her work.
"That's alright. I'm sure Anon won't mind short breaks while we write, we'll be doing quite a few more so that we have a good measure on his ability to recognize words."
"How many more are we gonna write, Twilight?" Spike asked, sliding another sheet to himself to copy.
"Mmm, by the looks of these tests, probably another forty or fifty," Twilight responded nonchalantly.
"Seriously!?" the little dragon moaned.
Many, many, many lists of circled words later, Twilight had a small stack of paper full of her observations of you- how long you took to identify words and parts of speech, your ability to recognize literary devices like rhyme, consonance, and the like, and much more. Her research had proved to be undeniably thorough, much to the dismay of Spike and Fluttershy who developed minor cramps from the writing. You weren't bothered by it so much as you were bored, but they had definitely put in their share of effort to help. You actually felt pretty bad for them, getting dragged into such tedious work for what seemed like little gain. After all, the purpose of bringing you to the castle was to help you solve your writing problem, wasn't it? You recalled some of the words on your completed tests as Twilight neatly sorted them into a stack, and were struck with an idea. Maybe you couldn't write to talk to them, but if somebody else did it for you, it would work equally well. Inspired and determined to test your idea, you waved frantically to get her attention.
"Yes, Anon? What is it?" You pointed at the stack of tests, then to the workspace in front of you. She glanced at the stack and back to you as she slid them across the table. "Did you want to see these again?" You ruffled through the sheets, and folded one around the word 'need.' You did the same for another that contained the word 'paper,' and laid the two words together in front of her. You had considered simply tearing the words out of the scrolls, but wanted to ensure that she had no intention of using them again.
"You need more paper? What for?" Twilight asked with a bemused look. You waved your hands and pointed at her, then to the words, and finally to the sheets before you, raising an eyebrow for good measure. She concentrated for a second, and gasped in realization. "Do I need those papers? If that's what you're asking, no, I didn't need them. You're welcome to do what you'd like with them." You signaled your thanks to Twilight, and made her jump as you tore a strip out of one of the sheets. You held it up with both hands so that everyone at the table could see.
"'Thanks'?" they all chimed at once. You watched their faces brighten as they looked at one another and back to you in understanding.
"Why didn't I think of this sooner?" Fluttershy bubbled, putting a hoof on her forehead with a smile. "Until we figure out how to help you write your own words, you can just use one's we write, like flash cards!"
"That's a great idea!" Spike cheered, before stopping to scratch his chin in thought. "But how many will he need? There's a whole lot of words that we don't have written down here," he added, unfolding one of the papers you had shown to Twilight.
"That's a good point, Spike," Twilight agreed. "Since Anon can draw well, he probably won't need simple, everyday things that he can see and show. Abstract concepts would be best, as well as names. I imagine you'd get pretty tired of trying to memorize everypony's cutie marks- even ponies themselves don't memorize the cutie marks of every pony they know to exact detail."
You spent the next half hour with Twilight and a massive dictionary on the opposite side of the room, copying down terms and concepts onto paper cards while Fluttershy and Spike rested their sore muscles on a nearby couch. Words that you struggled to draw out like 'time,' 'weather,' 'help,' and 'work' were among the first you had written down and cut out. By the time you were both finished, you had produced a thick stack of nearly five-hundred different cards, sorted by relevant subjects and then alphabetical order, which Twilight presented to you after putting them inside a lavender-colored fabric pouch. You fed the long, narrow cords from the back of the pouch through the belt loops on your jeans and tugged tight as you knotted them together on the opposite side.
"I made sure to put some dividers between each of the subjects so you can refer to them easily. It's up to you to make sure you keep them in order," Twilight explained with satisfaction. Quite frankly, you were certain you would eventually get them out of order, but promised yourself to do your best. You rummaged through the pouch for a moment, before promptly displaying a few cards to her. It felt awkward and strange compared to just drawing your thoughts, but you still felt confident after seeing her initial reaction to your idea.
[I'll try.]
"Good. I think that should wrap up things for today- wait, wait, hold on. Just a second." You watched Twilight curiously as she levitated the cards out of the pouch and focused, the glow around them intensifying for a brief moment before floating back to their home.
"I put a simple water-proofing spell on them, in case you get caught in the rain. Don't want to do this all over again, right?" You nodded in reply, and patted the pouch affectionately.
"Didn't you have more research that you wanted to get done today, Twilight?" Fluttershy asked, getting up from the couch to inspect the pouch on your hip.
"I had plenty more in mind at first, but I'm still not sure..." The lavender mare looked distant as her voice trailed off.
"What's the matter?"
"Well, technically speaking, I've been asked by the princesses to only observe Anon, not to actively study him," Twilight worried. "It's not like I'm going to get in trouble, but I don't exactly know if they'd approve of my help."
"You make it sound like they didn't want you to help Anon," Fluttershy argued, blinking a couple times. "That's not true... is it?"
"No, no, it's not, but Celestia was very clear that she wanted to see what he'd do on his own, under watch of the Elements." Seeing your opportunity to chime in, you dug into your word pouch and set a few cards onto the table in front of the dictionary.
[I appreciate your help anyway, Twilight.]
It took several seconds for you to thumb through the different sections and find the correct words--and even longer to get the thin, fragile sheets out without tearing them--but you were satisfied with the newfound flexibility they offered.
"I'm happy to hear-er, see it, Anon," Twilight beamed with a bashful smile. You waved her concerns off- you understood what she meant, no harm done.
"Well, I think that Anon's much better off with you stepping in than not. I'm sure we'll have fewer misunderstandings like before now, right Anon?" Fluttershy moved to your side happily, almost brushing against your leg like a cat. You gave her an affirmative nod and set your hand on her head. Suddenly, Twilight perked up, as if struck by an idea. She turned towards the closed dictionary you had both used earlier, and levitated it towards you.
"You know, just in case that comes up, it might be a good idea to have this around."
"Wait a second, Twilight, isn't that one of your oldest, most favorite dictionaries?" Spike pointed out from his seat on the couch. "You must really like Anon to give him that."
"N-no, it's not that!" Twilight blurted out, only to realize how loud she had just been. She cleared her throat and took a breath before turning back towards you. "I mean, it is one I've had since I started learning from Princess Celestia, and it holds fond memories, b-but that's irrelevant right now!" Twilight glanced away from you as she spoke, seemingly rattled about Spike's comment. You hadn't seen Twilight flustered before, nor did you expect it to be so abrupt.
"There are terms in this dictionary that you probably aren't familiar with, so if you need to you can use it for reference and studying on your own," she addressed, finally looking you in the eyes with a subtle blush.
"It's a gift, though, right?" Spike teased.
"I'm just letting him use it for now, Spike." You couldn't help but laugh as you graciously plucked the book out of the air, and signed your gratitude to Twilight once more. The temptation to put your hand on Twilight's head, as with Fluttershy, was hard to shake. It was your go-to gesture of appreciation and affection, but you restrained yourself out of fear you would embarrass her further. Not that you knew why she was embarrassed in the first place, anyway. You held the tome firmly under your arm and got Fluttershy's attention before reaching into your pouch for a card.
[Home]
"I think heading home is a lovely idea. It's about time for lunch, anyway," Fluttershy acknowledged with a sagely nod.
You and Fluttershy repeated your thanks to Twilight and Spike, and you followed the pegasus out of the castle into the warm afternoon air. You rubbed the pouch at your side happily as you walked, inwardly excited at the potential for conversation with Fluttershy. You would definitely get down to the bottom of the featureless pony vs. bathroom enigma, that's for sure. You looked down to a very thoughtful Fluttershy, however, and started to reconsider; she was a regular animal caretaker, so the subject wouldn't be that awkward, right?
"So, Anon," she began, meeting your gaze after a few moments of silence. "Now that you've got those cards, I'll bet there are a lot of questions you've been wanting to ask that you couldn't before. When we get back home, I'd be more than happy to answer them!" You chuckled weakly and wiped a few non-existent drops of sweat off of your brow, returning your attention to the path ahead.
"What's that look for? Did I say something funny?" |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 11 - Day 8 pt. 2 | Much of your afternoon and evening was spent trying out your new flash cards, with some degree of success. Fluttershy had managed to convince you to head into town with her to celebrate, and stood by you as you meekly ordered a couple sandwiches from a rather patient food stall owner. Following your lunch, you both took your time heading home before tending to the day's chores, the first of which involved heading into the forest beyond the cottage. Fluttershy, on her way home from her last visit to the new mother doe, noticed that a few large boulders were blocking part of the flow of the creek, and tasked you with lifting them up and out of the way. You could have made quick work of the blockage with your unnatural strength, if you didn't have to wait on fluttershy, who dealt with a rather irritable, elderly turtle who had become fond of the more stagnant waters. He supposedly lost his way from a watershed to the east, but intended on living in the large, dammed bend in the creek nonetheless. Never in your life had you considered the possibility of anyone having an argument with a turtle, let alone struggling to win said argument. With her usual manner of kindness and an immense load of patience, Fluttershy convinced him to begrudgingly return to his home and allowed you to finish your task by the time evening came.
You felt grateful for the cards Twilight had given you as you helped Fluttershy prepare a dinner of vegetable stir-fry, which had allowed you to make the suggestion in the first place. Fluttershy wasn't fond of cooking with heat, but you made sure to handle the bulk of the cooking. As per usual, you both ate your dinner in relative silence, aside from Fluttershy's fussing over Angel refusing to eat well. Once you were finished, you plopped down onto the couch in the living room, warm and well-fed.
"That was a lovely dinner, Anon," Fluttershy complimented, joining you on the couch. "I'm glad you suggested it." You hummed in agreement and rubbed your stomach in satisfaction.
"So now that we're done with everything for the day, what do you want to do?" Out of the corner of your eye, you could see her eyeing your pouch curiously. You thought back over the events of the day, and noticed Fluttershy's writing book still sitting on the kitchen counter through the doorway. It reminded you of what had happened earlier in the day, which was spurred on by your outburst the night prior. You rummaged through your pouch and started placing cards onto the table, earning Fluttershy's attention.
[I want to talk about last night.] You could see Fluttershy mentally recoil as she read the cards and looked at you with sudden worry.
"You're not upset about that, are you?"
[No, I'm curious.]
"Curious? About what?" she asked, her ears perking up.
[Your question. How I feel about ponies. Why ask?] You maintained a neutral, inquisitive expression as you arranged the cards on the table, hoping to keep Fluttershy at ease as best you could. She pondered the question while simultaneously avoiding your gaze.
"Well, at the time I was starting to wonder how you felt about being the only human in a town of ponies," she explained, putting her hoof to her chin and looking up towards the window across from you. "I wanted to know if you liked being here or not, even if you might feel lonely. I didn't mean to upset you, though."
[I'm not alone. You're here.] Your response was simple, but it drove a firm point. Although Twilight and all of Fluttershy's friends had made some effort to make you feel welcome, Fluttershy was the one who offered to take you in from the get-go. You didn't have memories of actually being around any other humans, only vague faces and figures; you weren't really concerned about loneliness in regards to humans, or at all, for that matter.
"That's sweet, thank you." Fluttershy replied, lowered her gaze from the table with a warm smile.
[I've learned that ponies are kind and caring.] You paused as you placed the last card down, and quickly replaced the first few once you were certain she had read them.
[You are kind and caring.] You gently placed your hand on Fluttershy's back as she re-read the sentence a few times, and felt her muscles stiffen and relax as her wings shifted slightly.
"Of course, Anon. I try my best to take care of my friends and make sure they're alright," she replied, a hint of bashfulness in her words, and on her face. You dug through your pouch, looking for the right words to respond with.
[You were generous and considerate from the moment you met me, a stranger. Just an animal.]
"That's true, but... I realized pretty quickly you weren't just an animal. We all did." Fluttershy finally made eye contact with you, now with a serious yet positive expression. "When you came down that hill and looked at me, and tried to reason with us, we knew better. And even if you were just a lost animal, I still would have been kind to you. It's what I do." You smiled and nodded in understanding. You recalled your first memories since your arrival in Ponyville, and had a flashback to your first day spent working outside, of the first time you saw Rainbow Dash.
[I have another question.]
"Go ahead, I'm all ears."
[Twilight's book talked about human behaviors and affection.] As you searched through your pouch, you inwardly thanked Twilight's inclusion of possessives on the back of the name cards she wrote. She really had put a lot of thought into making them. [What are those for ponies?] Fluttershy's ears began to tilt back as you put your thoughts onto the table, accompanied by a vivid blush. She opened her mouth to speak, only to shut it with an embarrassed grin as she tried to collect her thoughts.
"Well, um, I-I'm not exactly an expert with that sort of thing," she stammered. "Since I live out here by myself, I don't really see ponies too often unless I'm out with my friends." You looked at her skeptically- surely there had to be someone that had romantic interest in her at one point.
[Have you always lived out here?] You raised your eyebrows at her to emphasize your intent.
"Well, no, but nopony was interested in me before then. At least, not like that." You noticed Fluttershy's volume steadily lowering as she withdrew behind her pink curtain of a mane. In hindsight, maybe pressuring her about such a sensitive topic wasn't the best plan. You arranged a new sentence on the table, and drew her hair back so she could read.
[I'll bet they were too shy. Stallions can be like that.] It was a bit unusual to use the term 'stallions' instead of 'men,' but you figured you'd become accustomed to it soon enough.
"Yeah," Fluttershy giggled softly. "Not all of them, but maybe you're right." Her blush subsided as silence took over the conversation, both of you thinking about what to say next.
"If you don't mind, I'll ask the same thing you did earlier- why ask about that?" You scratched the back of your head. You weren't expecting that question, but you probably should have been. It was your turn to shrink under the watch of Fluttershy's inquisitive eyes before putting your thoughts in order.
[I get the feeling that some ponies] You stopped with the word 'like' in your hand, hidden from Fluttershy's view. Images of the night you carried Fluttershy into bed danced in your head, and you couldn't fight the paralyzing feeling of embarrassment that washed over you. To her, it was all just a dream, but by now you had pretty much figured out how she felt about you. Or, at least, what you thought she felt. It was possible you were wrong, but then what else could all that have meant?
"Anon?" You jumped when Fluttershy addressed you, and startled her in return. Before she could speak again, you deftly scooped up the cards you had set down back into your hand, and reconsidered your approach. Perhaps instead of being vague about who had interest in you, perhaps being specific was the better option. But there was no way you could just bring up that dream and expect Fluttershy not to get the wrong idea. Mentioning Rainbow Dash seemed inappropriate as well.
"There's no need to worry, Anon. You don't need to answer if you don't want to, and even if you do, I'm not going to judge you for it," Fluttershy assured, smiling at you warmly. Her response pulled tight on your heartstrings, and the honesty it carried was inspiring. Inspiring enough to sway you to do the same.
[I get the feeling that some ponies like me.] Reading back over the sentence, you felt like a shy twelve-year-old who had just recently discovered the concept of a crush. Fluttershy giggled as she read, and gently poked your thigh.
"Of course ponies like you, Anon. You're nice, considerate, and very helpful," she commented innocently. You smirked and held your forehead, surprised that this, of all moments, was the time that Fluttershy completely missed your statement. You pushed aside a couple cards and added another to your sentence.
[I get the feeling that some ponies really like me.] You dragged your finger along the bottom of the word 'really,' underlining it for emphasis. Fluttershy inhaled sharply, only to let it out through her teeth as she flashed you a questionably confused smile.
"Ohh, I see what you mean now," she added slowly. "But who are the ponies that you're referring to?" You were surprised by how well her awkward expression held as she spoke. In the back of your mind, the urge to gently grab her by the chin and point directly at her surged forth, held back only by sheer willpower.
[Twilight?] You made sure to add a question mark to imply your uncertainty. You didn't actually suspect Twilight was interested in you, but you wanted to test the waters with Fluttershy. You watched her relax as she considered your response.
"Wait, really? Are you sure about that?" she inquired, looking puzzled. "Twilight's not terribly romantic. I do think she means the best for you, but not anything like that." Fluttershy sounded remarkably relieved, which set you at ease as you searched your pouch for the name of a proper candidate.
[Rainbow Dash.]
"Rainbow Dash, too? What gives you that impression?" she asked, much more intrigued than before. "From what I've seen, she seems pretty uninterested in anything romantic, almost as much as Twilight."
[I spent some time with her a couple days ago that showed otherwise.]
"W-what happened?" Fluttershy leaned forward towards you, ears perked up in anticipation of your response. To say you weren't expecting this much interest from her was an understatement.
[While she was taking a break, she asked me to pet her.] Fluttershy's cheeks flushed again, and she looked at you like you had grown a second head.
"Wow, she did that? She is pretty forward, but something like that, and so suddenly..." Fluttershy put a hoof on her mouth, as if you were both talking about some salacious gossip instead of what one might consider doing to their pet. You didn't understand why she would react like that, given how common it was for the two of you.
[What is the significance of petting to ponies?] In hindsight, that definitely wasn't a sentence you ever imagined trying to convey to anyone. [Is it something special?]
"Well, it certainly feels nice, but I can't figure out how to describe it. I don't know if I'd call it special, but..." Fluttershy mumbled, trying to appear uninterested in the topic. "I did say before that I wasn't an expert on things like that." Once again, you were getting mixed signals from Fluttershy. It seemed like a big deal to Rainbow Dash, and you felt like it had helped you and Fluttershy bond, to some extent. And if it was a common gesture in Equestria, surely she wouldn't have been so bashful about it in the past, and Rainbow Dash wouldn't have gotten so worked up about it.
[Is it significant to you, not-an-expert?]
"M-maybe? I don't know," Fluttershy squeaked, letting her head hang lower with each syllable. "Frankly, before you came along, I had never considered being pet by anypony before." While her response made sense, you were no closer to understanding if the gesture was important or not. In hindsight, making a big deal out of it was what upset you in the first place- maybe letting it go was the better choice.
[I'm sorry if I made you feel pressured. It's all been pretty confusing.] You resisted your habit of patting Fluttershy's head reassuringly while she read your message, and felt guilt rise up in the pit of your stomach.
"Oh, don't worry, I'm fine," she murmured as she slowly sat back up. "If you don't mind me asking, though, do you know why Rainbow Dash asked you for that?"
[She mentioned seeing me do it to you, and wanted to know what it felt like.]
"Oh... oh, my." She looked deeply concerned as she stopped to think to herself. "I appreciate your honesty, Anon, but maybe you shouldn't have told me that. Or, maybe I shouldn't have asked."
[What do you mean?]
"Rainbow Dash is the Element of Loyalty, after all. She might be upset if she knew you told somepony when that was supposed to be a secret." You could see Fluttershy mentally backpedal as she defended her friend. That wasn't at all the response you were expecting, but it made sense. Thinking about it made you feel even guiltier than before, but you were sure that Fluttershy wouldn't talk about it to anyone else, if she was that concerned about you and her friends.
"Anyway, was there anypony else on that list you had in mind?" Fluttershy asked, trying to bring the conversation back on-topic. "I promise that I'm not trying to discourage you from any of them, I'm just interested to hear what you think." You glanced around the room, now unsure of the right way to get to your original intent, to ask Fluttershy about how she felt towards you. With the whole petting ordeal out of the way, you didn't have much evidence to point towards. You could have mentioned those few moments you'd seen her act strangely in her sleep--and when she thought she was asleep--but your gut told you that wasn't something to bank on.
[You were the last one on the list.] Fluttershy turned to you slowly, disbelief replacing the smile on her face.
"Me? You think I...?" Her cheeks flushed vibrantly, and her astonished reaction caught you off-guard. You scrambled to put words onto the table as she quietly focused on it, hoping to coax out what was going on in her head.
[You don't have to answer]-
"I mean, I do like you, but..." Your heart and hands stopped at the same moment her thought did. She glanced up at you briefly before directing her attention to the floor below the table. "I don't know exactly if I'm a part of that list." Your mind initially reeled in confusion, but your second reaction was that of a gentleman- calm, composed, and polite.
[My suspicions originally came from the petting thing.]
"That makes sense," Fluttershy murmured, nodding slowly. "Like I mentioned before, I don't really know how to describe that feeling yet."
[I understand now. I'm sorry for assuming.] You let out a heavy sigh, thoroughly puzzled at how the situation had unfolded.
"No, no, it's okay. I just- I don't know what to say," Fluttershy blurt out, suddenly lurching forward and putting a hoof on your hand. "A lot has happened in the last week or so. Figuring out things like that seems a bit hasty in a time period of that length, right?" It was your turn to blush as Fluttershy's candid reasoning sunk into you like a sharpened dirk. In all of your confusion, in your attempts to make sense of what was going on around you, perhaps you were jumping to far-reaching conclusions. You weren't necessarily guilty about what you had come to think--Fluttershy seemed to take it well--but you felt pretty silly after worrying about it for so long.
"Besides, we're from two completely different worlds," she continued. "There have certainly been relationships between different creatures here in Equestria, sure, but I remember from Twilight's book that wasn't the case for humans. There might be some ponies that are interested in you, but wouldn't that bother you?" You could tell she was genuinely trying to improve the situation by appealing to her limited knowledge about humans. Those words, however, hurt a great deal more than you had expected.
[I don't know. I can't tell if it bothers me. Like how you don't know about petting.] You sighed as you put the last card down, and turned to see Fluttershy cock her head to the side as she read. It seemed that you had come to a mutual understanding, or rather a lack thereof; she blinked several times and glanced at you and to the cards again without saying anything. You arranged another sentence, certain that she didn't immediately have anything to say.
[Maybe I should talk to Rainbow Dash about this situation.] Fluttershy hummed as she thought about your proposal, shaking her head disapprovingly.
"Maybe, but if what you told me is true, I think waiting to see how things turn out would be better," she reasoned. "Who knows, you might be right. But you shouldn't let that possibility change how you see her as a friend." You nodded in agreement at her wise words. Still, she looked wistful, as if she were recalling something unpleasant.
[Are you sure everything is okay? You seem troubled.] You put your free hand on top of her hoof, doing your best to convey your concern. She only nodded and wiped away her morose look with another smile.
"Oh, I was just remembering a dream I had. It's nothing to worry about," she admitted. In the back of your mind, you hoped and pleaded that it wasn't the dream you imagined it was.
You both turned towards the window at the sound of thunder rumbling in the distance. You hadn't even noticed the gentle sound of raindrops on the cottage during your conversation, which had become a hushed white noise that filled the room.
"I think starting up a small fire would be a good idea. It might get cold tonight." Fluttershy stepped off of the couch and calmly walked towards the fireplace.
You felt equally relieved and disappointed as you watched her prepare the fire, thinking over your conversation. It didn't quite feel like you had been turned down; you were surprisingly happy to find that your concerns weren't as serious as you'd made them out to be. But, with your own mixed feelings about your situation, you wondered how serious you were deep down, about Fluttershy and living with her. You had only recently started thinking of her as something more than just a caretaker, and you wondered just how far you would have gone, if she hadn't responded the way she did. After all, you both had become such quick friends, and although you were from different places, you shared quite a few similarities. It didn't seem unreasonable that moving forward from there would come with time.
You shook your head quickly- that kind of thinking didn't need to be your concern anymore. What was important was that you respected Fluttershy's feelings, and did your best to be a good friend while you sorted out your own. That, and figuring out how to approach Rainbow Dash about the subject as well. You recalled that tomorrow would be her next day off; she likely wouldn't spend her time practicing in the rain, so you'd probably be able to get a good chance to talk to her about it. As Fluttershy returned to her seat on the couch, you cleaned up your mess of cards on the table, and started a new sentence.
[By the way, where does Rainbow Dash live?]
"Oh, she has her own floating home just outside of town, the Cloudominium."
[Floating?]
"Yeah, it's a huge house made of clouds, almost like a mansion. You might not know it, but almost all pegasi live on top of clouds, with buildings and all sorts of things... also made of clouds." You chuckled in response, thoroughly impressed. "There's a place nearby called Cloudsdale, where you can find lots and lots of pegasi. It's a beautiful city, and I hope we can take you to see it sometime."
[How does the city stay in the air? Do all the pegasi just fly constantly?]
"No, not at all! Pegasi have the ability to walk on and move around clouds. Some of them, like Rainbow Dash, have jobs to arrange the weather by moving and changing cloud formations, like the rain outside now." A clap of thunder accentuated her point, causing her to jump in your direction and hold onto your side, before sheepishly looking towards the floor.
"Sorry about that, Anon. I'm... not a big fan of thunder," she apologized, still clinging to you.
[It's okay. Should we go to bed?]
"That sounds like a good idea. B-but wait, I had a question for you, Anon," Fluttershy stammered. "Although, after our conversation, I don't know how you'd feel about it." You cocked your head to the side curiously as she shied away from your stare.
[What is it?]
"Would you... prefer to sleep in my bed, instead of out here on the couch all the time?" she asked slowly, like an adolescent child asking for extra playtime after their curfew. "I wouldn't mind at all, and I'm sure it would be a lot better for your back and neck than being all cramped down here." To your surprise, it was a pretty tame request. Or was it an offer?
[Certainly. Why would I feel bad about it?] It didn't make much sense to you why you'd turn Fluttershy down at first, but then it hit you. Before Fluttershy could respond, you swiftly slid your last thought aside and put a new one down on the table.
[You didn't hurt my feelings, if that's what you're worried about.]
"That's good to hear, I suppose," Fluttershy remarked, followed by a calm sigh. When it came down to it, Fluttershy really did have your best interest in mind, even when you weren't aware of it. "Let's go ahead and turn in for the night then, hm?" You nodded in agreement and set your pouch down on the table before getting up to follow her upstairs.
It felt nice, having that weight off of your chest, even if it wasn't relieved the way you thought it would be. You pondered this as you undid the clasp on your choker, setting it on the dresser next to the doorway in Fluttershy's room. You weren't even remotely sleepy, but it was still late, and the opportunity to relax and sort out your thoughts was more than welcome. The two of you slid beneath Fluttershy's comforter and settled down in near silence, save for the pattering of raindrops on the window. You turned to face it and watch the distant flashes of lightning, barely noticing gentle shaking in the bed and the warm feeling building up on your back. You turned your head just enough to see Fluttershy quietly inching her way towards you out of the corner of your eye. She was keenly focused on your back, but froze up the moment she looked up and made eye contact with you.
"Is it alright if I sleep close to you, Anon? It's okay to say no," she mumbled meekly. You gave her a patient nod, and scooted back a few inches towards her. Without another word, she pressed herself to your back and let out a soft yawn, and you could feel her face press into your shoulder-blades. Another clap of thunder echoed through the cottage, but she jumped only a little bit, instead wrapping one of her forelegs around your side tightly. It was a strange, new feeling for you, but it was pleasant nonetheless. Being able to comfort Fluttershy simply by being present made you feel warm inside, and you welcomed the sensation.
Another bit of thunder rang out, much closer this time, and Fluttershy's leg tightened even harder around your waist. You carefully pulled your arm back and massaged her hoof with your fingertips, hoping to calm her down. Slowly, the muscles in her leg relaxed and you were able to breathe easy again. Just as you were starting to get comfortable a few minutes later, you felt Fluttershy withdraw her foreleg and quietly shift around under the covers. She pulled back from your body, so you took the opportunity to turn onto your back to free your arm that was falling asleep. Almost immediately, Fluttershy rolled back onto you and gently gripped your other arm and leg with her limbs. You looked down, expecting to see a wide-eyed, terrified Fluttershy, but instead met an adorable yet bashful smile.
"I know I'm the one who suggested going to bed, but I suppose I'm not as tired as I thought I was," she mumbled, avoiding your gaze by looking out the window. "M-maybe it's the lightning. If you're not tired either, thought, I'd still like to ask you another question or two. Is that alright?" You regretted not bringing your pouch upstairs with you, but it probably wouldn't be a huge deal. You hummed your approval, and wiggled your back to get into a more comfortable position.
"First off, I guess, are you actually okay with how close we are?" You nodded enthusiastically in response, and gave one of her forelegs a gentle pat as you scooted closer to her.
"No, I don't mean physically close, silly," she laughed. "I mean as friends. I can't stop thinking about how quickly some of the ponies in town have become interested in you, and..." Fluttershy stopped mid-sentence, her smile melting away like she regretted bringing up the topic. You nodded slowly and gestured for her to continue.
"I just want to make sure that you're okay living here with me, I guess." You moved your head to shoot her a challenging look. After everything she had done for you and you had done to try and repay her, it struck you as odd that she would worry about something like that now. It certainly didn't sound like that was all she had to say in the matter, either. She blinked several times and looked around at every spot in the room that wasn't in your general direction.
"What? Is there something on my face?" You smiled wryly at her attempt to distract you, but rested your head back against the pillow. You reminded yourself that there was no need to press her for answers- if she had something she wanted to say, she would say it eventually. She usually did, anyway.
Silence settled in the room once more, and you absentmindedly reached with your free arm to scratch her head. Even though, Fluttershy was the one who had initially taken you in, the gesture felt strangely like you were treating her as your pet. The thought made you pause, spurring Fluttershy to wiggle her head underneath your fingers to get you to continue. Her reaction didn't help your train of thought, but you resumed running your fingers through her mane, eliciting a calm sigh from the mare. .At some point, you thought, you would have to figure out if you could get the same kind of reaction out of other ponies- for the sake of knowledge, of course.
"I wonder what will happen on Sunday when you go to see the princesses," Fluttershy spoke up, changing the previous subject. "Did Twilight tell you what the meeting was about?" You grunted and shook your head, trying to recall Twilight's sudden interjection when you were planning with Rarity. You knew that she probably wanted to bring up her research on you, and was worried about their response to her providing you with a new way of communication. You weren't sure, though, how Celestia would address you after your involvement with Fluttershy, Twilight, and all of their friends, as well as the information Twilight had gathered from the choker.
"Oh, well. I'm sure that it'll be fine, though," Fluttershy added with a long yawn. "Princess Celestia already let you leave home after seeing you help out, after all." You smiled, reassured by Fluttershy's ever-present hopefulness. You gingerly drew your arm out of her grasp and pulled her closer, minding the position of her wings as you rested your hand on her side. She silently snuggled up to your chest, and didn't so much as flinch when thunder crashed against the house again. Nothing more was discussed as you both stayed in that tender yet slightly-awkward embrace, listening to the storm outside beat down on the roof and windows.
Your thoughts, dragging along as sleep started to take you, drifted from Fluttershy to Rainbow Dash and how to approach her about her perspective towards you, and if you would at all. It sounded pretty shallow, wondering like a schoolyard child about her strange behavior, as if she felt any different towards you than Fluttershy did. You could count on one hand how many separate instances you and the brash pegasus had talked to one another, and yet something about her teasing and occasionally elusive attitude towards you was endearing. Even if it was too soon for something to develop between you and someone else, as Fluttershy had implied, you couldn't help but wonder if Rainbow Dash was thinking about the same thing. |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 12 - Day 9 | The smell of the forest air on the wind washed over you as you relaxed outside in the garden with Fluttershy. The rain from the night before continued to beat down on Ponyville and the Everfree forest, but you both remained safe and dry under an awning you helped her put up. The wind was gentle enough as to not push it over, but still enough to give you a slight chill. After a short debate, you helped Fluttershy bring out some light blankets so that you could sit in your chairs comfortably, without fear of getting sick. The conversations of the night before echoed in your mind, but you didn't feel any different sharing a moment like this with her. You wagered that your talk had actually solidified your friendship with her, as awkward and occasionally confusing as it had been up to this point. You both remained silent as you sat and listened to the rain, occasionally turning to the table between you to snatch up some of the fruit you had brought out.
In the distance, you noticed something moving against the direction of the clouds. After a moment's inspection, you realized it was Rainbow Dash, streaking towards the cottage at high speed. Strangely enough, just as you were able to start making out details of the speeding pegasus, she held out her wings and braked mid-air to an almost complete halt. Fluttershy perked up at the sound of wings beating the air, and craned her neck to the side to see Rainbow Dash descending to your spot in the garden.
"Good morning! How are you?" Fluttershy greeted cheerfully.
"Oh, I'm fine. Figured I'd come over and see what you guys were up to." Rainbow Dash stepped under your awning and shook the water off of her wings in one swift movement and sat down in front of the table. "What exactly are you doing?" You held up your hand as Fluttershy opened her mouth to speak, and drew out a few cards from the pouch in your lap.
[We're relaxing.] Rainbow Dash gave you a funny look after reading the cards in your hand, and exchanged glances with Fluttershy.
"Relaxing? But it's, like, 8:00 A.M., how can you be relaxing already?" she exclaimed in amazement. "The day's barely started!"
"I always start my day calmly and slowly, if I'm not too busy," Fluttershy chimed in. "Since Anon's able to help with breakfast and occasional morning chores, I get a little more time for myself before I have to really get going."
[Why not join us?] Rainbow Dash snickered a bit at your offer, but remained seated.
"I don't really know if relaxing first thing in the morning is really my thing, but it's not like I have anything else to do." You were surprised at her standoffish tone, but Fluttershy didn't seem to notice it in the slightest, closing her eyes and laying her head back against the chair. You got up and pulled a third chair forward in between yours and Fluttershy's, certain that it would make a better seat than sitting in the wet grass. Rainbow Dash have you her thanks, and stretched out with a long yawn. A few quiet moments passed before she leaned over to Fluttershy.
"So what are you doing today?" Rainbow Dash inquired, gently startling Fluttershy.
"Me? I'm going to visit a doe that lives nearby, who recently gave birth to her first fawn. They've been doing well, but I wanted to check in on them again to make sure everything's still alright," Fluttershy explained cheerily.
"Oh, wow. Make sure to give her my congratulations." Rainbow Dash whipped back in her seat and turned to you with a grin. "How about you? Any plans for the day?" You grabbed your chin as you pretended to consider your normally empty schedule. You shook your head and shrugged, spurring Rainbow Dash's smile to grow.
"You could always come hang out at my place, if you're not doing anything," she remarked, looking back to Fluttershy. "You know, when you're done here."
[That sounds nice. In a little bit, then.] You arranged the cards carefully in your lap, making sure that she could read them easily.
"Awesome!" She pumped her hoof in the air to herself, and settled back into her chair. "So, uh, when will you be done?" You closed your eyes as you rested your head against the chair and shrugged. You heard Rainbow Dash sigh in exasperation, and let only a hint of an amused smile spread across your face.
"Maybe that's a good idea, Anon," Fluttershy piped up. "I wasn't planning on being out here much longer, anyway." Rainbow Dash practically launched herself onto the grass from her chair in excitement.
"Yeah, maybe that's a good idea! Actually DOING something!" she joked. Fluttershy rolled her eyes, and got up from her seat. You exchanged amused glances with her briefly before she bid both of you farewell and headed inside the cottage.
"So!" Rainbow Dash blurted out, unfurling her wings to stretch them out widely- or was that flexing? "I think we should have a race, first. How does that sound?" You fished through your pouch as you stood up, looking for the right answer.
[I guess. Where to?]
"To my house, where else? And the winner should get a prize." She turned her back to you as she thought, and you snapped your fingers to get her attention.
[That's hardly fair.] The corners of her mouth drew up into a cheeky grin, and you could see that familiar competitive look in her eyes.
"How is it not fair? Are you scared you're gonna lose?" she taunted.
[Yes. I don't know where it is.] You struggled to hold all of the cards in just your hands, and wished Twilight could have given you some kind of portable podium of sorts. You expected a response from Rainbow Dash, but was met with a huge gust of air and spray of water as she quickly took off into the air.
"Don't worry, I'll be sure to get there first- you can just follow me!"
You held your pouch firmly closed in one hand as you jogged off towards her, careful to make the jump over the creek before starting into a sprint. Seeing her start to pull away rapidly, you put real force behind your strides and quickened your already breakneck pace down the grassy slope leading away from Fluttershy's cottage. Luckily for you, Rainbow Dash was only twenty, maybe thirty feet above the ground, low enough for you to keep track of her against the dark gray clouds above her. The hill evened out into level ground and let into loosely arranged forest that blocked your view of Rainbow Dash. You kicked hard against the ground and leapt high into the air above the trees, considerably higher than you had anticipated; while you were still far behind her, you sailed well above her altitude in a long arc.
Much to your amusement, she actually turned her head behind her and slowed down to check for you behind her. You quickly realized that, at the rate she was now travelling, you were at serious risk of colliding with her. Unable to call out her name, you yelled loudly as you started your descent. She barely heard you in time, just a blur flying down out of nowhere like a screaming banshee. You twisted your body to try and land in a clearing ahead of her, and braced yourself for the impact. Even as waterlogged as the ground was, it had little give beneath your crushing landing, and let out a loud schlock sound as you took off once more.
"What the hay, Anon!?" Rainbow Dash cried out behind you. "You trying to kill me or something?"
You cackled excitedly as you rushed through the trees, narrowly avoiding rocks and overhead branches while you took off. In your adrenaline rush, you remembered that Rainbow Dash was the one that knew where you were headed, but you tossed that thought aside. It was likely that Rainbow Dash took a straight path from her home to the cottage, and so it stood to reason that if you continued on in a straight line, you would eventually find it. Just as you affirmed the thought, the forest before you cleared up to reveal a small valley dotted with pink trees. In the distance, you saw a stunning, mansion-like structure with a giant rainbow spilling out of it floated in the air. Instead of risking a jump down the incoming hill, you turned your heels to slide down its bank, spraying water and mud behind you. Rainbow Dash sailed into view, flying upside down and yawning as if she were ready to take a nap. After flashing you a toothy, smug grin, she flipped rightside-up and sped away from you towards the Cloudominium. Confident that your ride down was clear of any obstructions and that you would likely lose the race, you looked back up to observe Rainbow Dash's home a bit more. Like Fluttershy had said, it looked like it was built entirely out of clouds, and to call it grandiose was an understatement. If this was housing for one pegasus, you thought, what could an entire civilization possibly look like?
You felt the grass beneath your sneakers start to drag on your feet as the hill flattened out, and broke into a run once more. You were honestly surprised at how quickly you had travelled there; it couldn't have possibly been more than two or three minutes that you had been tailing Rainbow Dash. It was difficult to tell if it had just been a short distance, or if you were really just capable of maintaining such an inhuman speed for so long. You didn't know what was so special about Equestria that let you accomplish such feats, but you weren't complaining. Almost a minute later, you saw Rainbow Dash land on the ground beneath the Cloudominium, and forced one last breakneck sprint towards her.
"I'm impressed, Anon, you almost had me there," Rainbow Dash chuckled, playfully punching your shoulder. "For that, I'll forget about that whole prize thing. It was a joke, anyway." You huffed an unintelligible response as you felt yourself come down from your adrenaline-induced high, absolutely exhausted.
"What was that? You should probably stick to your cards, Anon," Rainbow Dash teased. You flattened out the pouch, which had been crumpled in your grip for the past few minutes, and pulled a few out.
[No, it was a deal.] You panted heavily as you displayed them to her, and tried your best to smile convincingly. You didn't explicitly agree to the bet, but what harm could it possibly do?
"Well, that's fine with me, I guess," she remarked, shrugging. "I don't have anything for you to do right now, but I'll keep it in mind." You acknowledged her statement with a nod. Suddenly, you were struck by realization as you looked up to the enormous house above you- you might have made it to Rainbow Dash's home, but you had no means of actually making your way up to enter. Even if Rainbow Dash had a cloud to carry you up with, Twilight wasn't around to cast her cloud-walking spell again. You started going through your pouch frantically to alert her, but she stopped you with a knowing smile.
"If you're worried about getting up there, I already had something in mind," she assured, bouncing her eyebrows at you. "Just wait here for a second." With that, she took to the air and flew up to the front entrance. The booming sound of the doors slamming open, similar to wood, caught you off-guard. You stood patiently beneath the cloud structure for a couple minutes, before the mare shot out of one of the windows and returned to you. She was carrying a bottle of purple fluid in her mouth by its long neck, and dragging behind her a familiar-looking cloud tied up with rope. She settled down in front of you and offered you the potion, gently spitting it out into your palm.
"That right there is a special cloud-walking potion that Zecora made for me," she explained. "You know, for guests?" she added, returning your confused look with a sardonic expression.
You apprehensively undid the cork on the potion, letting the sour smell of the fluid waft up to your nose. The last potion you had did a number on you, and you weren't in any rush to repeat that experience.
[Will it hurt?]
"I don't think so. Most ponies say it tastes terrible, but I don't know how it is myself," she replied. You downed the entire bottle in one go, forcing yourself to choke down what tasted like melted erasers mixed with grapes, with the consistency of maple syrup. At no point in your life had you wished for a drink of water than you did right then. While you recovered from the experience, Rainbow Dash put your cloud on the ground in front of you, taking back the bottle and jamming the cork back in. A tingling sensation spread throughout your skin, and you shuddered uneasily, hoping that it was only the potion taking effect. You tested your weight on the cloud and found that you weren't able to pass through, and promptly sat upon it. You both exchanged nods, and Rainbow Dash gently carried you up to the entrance above you.
Up close, you were amazed at how detailed the place was. Her home was distinctly Greek-inspired, with huge columns and archways that almost looked like they were made of marble. You placed your hand upon one and was shocked to find that it even felt like solid stone. Rainbow Dash chuckled as you examined her home in awe, and opened the front door for you to reveal an even more impressive interior, decorated with pegasus statues and various trophies. Oddly enough, you could have sworn that a few of those statues were actually of Rainbow Dash herself.
"Here, I'll take you to the kitchen for something to wash that down," she called out as she sailed past you through a doorway on your left. You had to jog to keep up with Rainbow Dash, and tried to take in every detail around you as you ran through the halls behind her.
You were stopped in your tracks as you ran face-first into something cold and hard that wasn't in the hallway a split-second before. You slammed backwards into the floor, and held your throbbing forehead as you searched for the obstacle. The object slid down the hall and collided with a door not too far from you with a dull thud. On closer inspection, it looked like a small, green tortoise with a propeller attached to its back. Unlike you, it looked relatively unfazed by the collision, and calmly strode towards you. You sat up and continued massaging the welt forming on your forehead while the tortoise stopped before you. Rainbow Dash quickly came round the corner ahead to uncover the source of the noise, and bolted towards you with visible concern. At least, you had assumed she was heading towards you, until she scooped up the tortoise in her forelegs and started fawning over it.
"Oh, are you okay, Tank? I'm sure it was just an accident!" she cooed, turning him over in her hooves and inspecting him for any sign of injury. Tank gave her a long lick, to which she giggled cutely before putting him back onto the ground. "Tough as always."
"Sorry about that, Anon. Are you alright?" You nodded and gave her a thumbs-up, hoping the bumps on your head wouldn't be too noticeable.
You chugged down the glass of water, grateful to wash away the bitter taste in your mouth that had been lingering. You wiped your mouth on your sleeve after downing the entire glass in one go, and offered it back to Rainbow Dash.
"Wow, thirsty, huh?" she commented, setting the glass onto the counter by the sink. "Of course, most ponies are after having one of those potions. I should talk to Zecora about that." As she considered the idea, you fetched a few cards out of your pouch.
[What are we doing today?] It was a simple question- Rainbow Dash had invited you to her home, but so far all you'd done was exhaust yourself and nearly give yourself a concussion twice-over. She read over the cards and suddenly perked up in surprise.
"That's... a good question, actually," she muttered to herself before pacing the kitchen. "What are we gonna do? I can't go outside to practice in the rain." You waved your hand to get her attention as you reached for your pouch again, opting to place your cards onto the island in the center of the room.
[Why not? It's not that bad out.]
"I might have fur, but even ponies can get sick out in the rain, Anon," Rainbow Dash chided. "Flying at high speeds while wet can get a pegasus sick in a heartbeat." You nodded your head, conceding her point. You thought about suggesting she explain some of her trophies and awards, but given her normal attitude and their sheer volume, it didn't sound like a great idea. The size of her home gave you a hint of inspiration.
[What if you flew under your house? It's pretty big, and would protect you from the rain.] It seemed as good an idea as any to you, and you waited patiently for her to finish reading your thought.
"Under the house? I mean, that could work," she replied, rubbing her chin. "There's not quite enough room to do all of my high-speed stunts, but it wouldn't be impossible to get some good practice in."
[Sounds good, then.] Satisfied, you scooped up your cards and started towards the doorway. Before you could leave the kitchen, though, you felt something latch onto the back of your shirt and hold you firmly in place. You turned to see Rainbow Dash's teeth gripped onto the fabric, with her magenta eyes looking up at you with concern.
"Hol' on, der," she mumbled over the fabric, before spitting it out. "What about you? Don't you want to do anything fun? You already watched my practice the other day!" You scratched the back of your head and chuckled. Sure, you had seen parts of her routine before, but at the time you had been more preoccupied with examining the landscape around Ponyville and playing with your tiny cloud sculptures to pay any serious attention to her.
[I don't mind. I like watching you.] Not a lie, no, but definitely a cover for your real thoughts. You didn't want to hurt her pride, after all. Her eyes gleamed at your response, and she nodded happily before taking to the air and slowly flying past you. You followed her back to the entrance and seated yourself on your cloud, ready for her to carry you down below.
You inhaled the crisp, cool air as you descended to the halfway point between the house and the ground, and drew out your whiteboard and marker as Rainbow Dash turned back around.
"What's that for? Were you gonna draw me, soaring majestically through the air?" she teased, raising an eyebrow. You nodded without hesitation- you didn't have much practice drawing moving figures, and there wasn't a better time for you to start than trying to focus on her. You watched her smirk drop, replaced by a surprised frown. "I... didn't actually think you would say yes. But I've got a better idea!" She flew out a couple feet from you, towards the center space beneath the Cloudominium.
"I'm gonna tell you what my tricks will be, and you can give me a score on how good they are!" You waved your hands frantically, gesturing for her to come back.
[I still can't write numbers.] You felt sorry for her as her ears drooped a little, but she instantly perked back up and patted you on the shoulder.
"You can count, right?" You nodded emphatically. "Maybe you can just draw tally marks, then? Just big vertical lines, and you do the sideways one like this-" Rainbow Dash took the marker out of your hand with her mouth and drew four tall lines, with a fifth crossing them diagonally, before dropping the marker back into your lap.
"I can still read that from a distance, and I'll probably already know how to improve anyway. The feedback would help, though." You gave her another thumbs-up, and readied yourself to score her.
"Alright! The first trick is a triple corkscrew, and then a jacknife into a dead drop, and after that..." You struggled to keep up with the pegasus as she continued listing off aerial stunts, several of which you clearly knew weren't actual words. After losing count of just how many she had planned, you held up your hand to stop her.
[I barely know half of those.]
"Wait, really?" she blurt out, rubbing her forehead in frustration. "Well, that's not a problem, I guess. I'll slow it down for you, then. One at a time, and I'll see what you think of each one before I do it again. Sound good?" You nodded again, and watched her carefully as she flew back to her starting position. After you exchanged nods with her, she soared up towards the foundation of her home, and spiraled over your head in three large corkscrews. Your head snapped back to try and follow her, and you nearly fell backwards onto the cloud from the gust of wind following her at high speed.
"How was that? I'm talking about how smooth the corkscrews were, and how straight the whole thing looked," she called out, flying back. You'd barely registered her whole flight in great detail, and quickly drew five tally marks on your board before holding it up to her to see.
"A five!?" Rainbow Dash's jaw practically fell off of her face as she flew over to double-check your feedback. "I didn't know you were so critical, Anon, or I would have never suggested this!" You knew she was joking, but her tone was still harsh enough to make you feel a little guilty. You gestured for her to try the trick again, pointing with both hands toward two spots out in front of you. "You want me to do it over here this time?" You grunted in approval, and erased the marks on your board with the back of your hand for her next attempt. Being able to see her flight from a farther distance helped, and you could tell that her first corkscrew went slightly higher than the others. The rate that she ascended and descended and sailed side-to-side was acceptable, but the first loop was definitely off. Or was it? You weren't an expert, but you put down another rating anyway, just in time for her to pull out of her flight and look in your direction.
"An eight? That's good, but not good enough. I think the start of it is what's tripping me up," she yelled, directed more at herself than you. Once more, she sped towards one side of the Cloudominium, this time arcing into her corkscrews much faster, evening out the kink that you had initially spotted.
You continued to score Rainbow Dash as she performed more tricks- her loop-the-loops were clearly well-practiced, but she seemed to struggle to get sharp, repeated turns properly when it came to exiting them and moving straight into another trick. It took several attempts for her to be able to maneuver into them consistently, especially jack-knifing towards the ground like she had mentioned earlier. Still, over the next hour, she showed serious improvement for such a short amount of time. You were also improving on keeping track of her movements, even those of her wings, which seemed to beat almost as fast as a regular bird's. Rainbow Dash really was stunning to watch, even if it was just the same set of tricks again and again from different angles. She stood out drastically from the underside of her cloud home and the dark, dreary sky above it, and watching her started to become absolutely mesmerizing. Eventually, Rainbow Dash felt satisfied with your scoring of her performance, and opted to 'let' you watch as she moved on to different, more complicated tricks.
"Don't worry about scoring me anymore, Anon," she had said with a wide grin. "I know I'm awesome, I just wanted to get your perspective, too." Without another word, she had taken off and started perfecting her own tricks, the names of which were even more ridiculous than the ones she had listed off earlier. You kept watching her, only looking away to make addition to your sketches of her mid-flight. She was particularly expressive when she was flying, assuming a driven, focused look in her eyes, full of determination and excitement. Her rainbow-colored mane whipped in the air behind her, and you became quickly aware of why she had it cut so short- anything longer, and it would have only gotten in the way. Drawing her toned body was probably the most captivating part of the entire experience, and you fought to focus on your drawing rather than taking her in with your own eyes.
"Whoa, Anon. That's actually really good." Rainbow Dash's quiet words of disbelief jerked you away from your drawing, making you painfully aware of how close she was looking over your shoulder. You nodded in agreement, holding the whiteboard out at a distance. You had done your best to capture Rainbow Dash's figure mid-turn, focusing on the twisting of her barrel and her splayed out wings as she righted herself coming out of her previous stunt. In your mind, it wasn't anything impressive. On the contrary, trying to properly keep her figure proportioned was immensely difficult, given that you had little experience drawing ponies, especially ones moving at incredible speeds.
"Hey, uh, can I ask you something dumb?" She turned to the side and avoided your gaze, smiling awkwardly. "Did you plan on, you know... putting that on paper?" It wasn't a question you were expecting, but it was harmless enough. Redrawing it wouldn't be as fluid as drawing it in the moment, but it wouldn't be difficult, either. You shook your head, and fished through your pouch for a moment.
[Why do you ask?]
"No reason! I just thought that if you wanted to keep that drawing, or something, I could give you paper to put it on." You folded your arms and shot Rainbow Dash an accusatory look. Somehow, she seemed even worse at lying than Fluttershy.
"I think I've got some in my room, come on!" she bubbled excitedly, leading you up the first set of stairs as you returned inside. Your lungs were heaving by the time you reached the sixth flight, and you had started breaking a sweat. You might have been plenty stronger than a normal human, but your stamina definitely needed some work. You wondered how any of Rainbow Dash's non-flying guests ever navigated the gigantic house, and whether or not they actually stayed long enough to need housing.
Rainbow Dash eventually turned to a large doorway, framed by large pillars and decor, presumably her room, judging by the number of Rainbow Dash-esque statues that lead up to it. She hurried inside and started digging through drawers near her bed, and pulled out a small, unlabeled wire-bound notebook. She quickly tore a sheet from it, and offered it to you.
"I don't really have a lot of spare paper, but you can have a blank page from my diary," she explained with a cheery grin.
[A diary?] You didn't expect Rainbow Dash to keep a diary, but then again, there wasn't much reason for her not to.
"Twilight suggested I keep a diary for whenever I run into personal stuff, you know? It's not really a big deal, and I don't use it often, but it helps. Sometimes." She took a standoffish tone as she gestured with the diary, but as it slipped from her grip she frantically flailed around to catch it mid-air. She froze the instant that she regained possession of it, and chuckled in embarrassment as she returned to her normal position.
"Anyway, you're welcome to do your thing wherever you want." You glanced around the room, and settled your gaze on the enormous bed in the center of Rainbow Dash's room. You sat down on the edge and slipped your shoes off before scooting towards the center of the mattress, and held out your hand to retrieve her notebook. She held it away from you in confusion, and you made a drawing motion with your free hand; you needed something hard to write on, some surface that could hold up the paper.
"You want something to write on? Sure, I can get that for you, but not my diary, okay?" You acquiesced, and waited patiently for her as she searched a nearby bookshelf for a suitable replacement. Of all the ponies you knew, you didn't anticipate seeing her have a bookshelf, especially not one full of comic books. She pulled out a fairly dense book--a dictionary, of all things--and tossed it onto the bed next to you. As you slid it underneath the paper, you paused in reaction to Rainbow Dash's sudden impact as she flopped onto the bed behind you. Once you were certain she was settled, you set your whiteboard to the side and started meticulously copying your drawing. Soon, every thick, aberrant line made by the marker was refined by the pencil tip, and you relished the ability to draw with greater detail than before. You felt Rainbow Dash stir, and paid no attention to her until you felt her peering around your arm, watching you work.
"Wait, do my hips really look like that when I'm flying?" she commented out loud, pointing under your drawing arm. You grunted at her neutrally, hoping she would back up and let you continue. "C'mon, you can't seriously tell me they look like that!" You held up your unfinished drawing in comparison to your doodle so that she could see both. You then pointed to her hips, back to the doodle, and back to the paper. As toned as Rainbow Dash was, you were certain that her form depicted on the page--albeit surprisingly shapely--was not inaccurate.
"You gotta change it," she demanded with a pout.
[It's just a drawing. You asked for it.]
"And I'm asking that you make me look awesome!" she half-argued, half-whined, nudging your arm with her hoof.
[You already look awesome.]
"More awesome, then!" You rolled your eyes, and set out to erase and 'improve' your drawing, if only to get her to quiet down and stop poking you. Not a minute later, Rainbow Dash started commenting on your details, to which you responded by putting a finger to your lips and promptly hushing her. She didn't take much offense to the gesture, but didn't seem to care about it, either; rather than talk, she started to huff, sigh, groan, or otherwise state her displeasure towards your depiction, despite the fact that it was nearly identical to the marker drawing you had already made. Frustrated, you reached around behind you and grabbed her by her sides, lifting her like an unusually large puppy to the open space in front of you the bed. She stiffened up and didn't resist you carrying her, and remained in the same position, face frozen in surprise, for several seconds while you returned to your work, tipping the page away from her so that you could focus.
You occasionally stopped drawing to look at Rainbow Dash for reference, and tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible. Her puzzled look eventually turned to that of boredom as she lay on the bed before you, waiting for the end product of your efforts. While your work started consuming all of your focus, Rainbow Dash eventually perked up with a devilish grin spread across her face. You hadn't noticed it at first, but at some point, you realized she had assumed a seductive pose, displaying her barrel towards you while playfully rubbing one hoof back and forth along her waist. The sight prompted you to hold the dictionary out in front of your embarrassed, confused face.
"Oh man, you should have seen the look on your face!" she cackled.. "How long did it take you to notice?" You put the book down gently before you, and held your head in one hand in wonder. Today had been full of surprises, and yet this should have been expected. You glanced down at the paper, which was practically finished, save for a few smudged areas where you had been erasing and redoing smaller details in her feathers. With a few more pencil strokes, the piece would be finished, but why stop there? You recalled her reaction to you drawing her in the first place, and was struck with a plan for revenge. You subtly picked up your whiteboard and pretended to doodle more of the mare holding her sides as she continued to laugh. Rainbow Dash quickly recognized your focused silence, and sat up when she saw you 'working' on the whiteboard.
"What, are you actually drawing that pose? Seriously?" You merely hummed to yourself, pretending to ignore her accusation. She watched you for a few moments with curious contempt, which morphed into mild frustration as you leaned the board away from her prying eyes. Unable to see your blank canvas by craning her neck around, she rose to her hooves and tried walking around you to get a glimpse of the board. You responded by bending towards the side--all while maintaining your sitting position--by twisting to and fro as she moved around you.
"Come on, Anon, stop, you don't need to draw that!" she complained, betraying the pleading tone in her voice with an amused expression. Her movements turned from simple walking and jumping across the bed to physically moving you around, which prompted you to rotate the board in your hands to face it away from you. You heard her growl playfully as she leapt over your shoulder into your lap and vainly tried to wrestle the board out of your grip. You struggled against her prying hooves, and fell over onto your back as she tried pulling your arms apart from each other, with the mare landing sitting up on your chest as you continued to keep the board in your vice-like fingers. After just a few seconds, however, you became painfully aware of the position you were in as Rainbow Dash's tail flitted back and forth and brushed over your face. You instantly released the board from your grip and rapidly patted Rainbow Dash's thigh to get her attention. At first, she wasn't entirely certain what it was you wanted, but her cheeks flushed vibrant red as she looked down and properly assessed the situation. She clambered off of you and helped you sit up, her wings shifting uneasily as she sat down beside you.
"Uh... sorry about that, Anon. Guess I got a little carried away," she mumbled. You waved your hand in front of your face, and reached for your pouch.
[Don't worry about it. All in good fun.] It was your turn to smile fiendishly as you picked up the face-down whiteboard and revealed its empty surface to her. She cocked her head to the side and looked at it for a few seconds before her eyes widened in understanding.
"Oh, you- you didn't actually draw anything there, did you?" she accused, pushing against you playfully. You laughed heartily and held your position as Rainbow Dash's shoving gradually eased up, although she didn't move from your side. Silence filled the room as the rain gently pattered on the walls of her room, and you sighed comfortably. Your heart had finally started to calm down, and you and Rainbow Dash yawned simultaneously. You glanced down at her to see her rubbing one eye and stretching her other foreleg out to her side, and gave her head a few gentle pats. The second you lifted your hand away, though, it was firmly pressed back down by a warm hoof. You closed your eyes and started rubbing your fingertips through the mare's mane, earning a sigh in return. Your arm eventually tired, and you flopped backwards onto the bed and stretched your limbs out to relax. Rainbow Dash seemed hesitant to do the same. You kept your eyes closed and folded your arms behind your head, wondering what her next move would be.
"Hey, Anon..." Rainbow Dash started, unmoving. "Can I ask you something dumb?" You nodded your head, and hoped that she would notice the subtle gesture.
"Is it okay if I lay down with you? I mean, it's MY bed, after all." Secretly, you had been hoping she would, and contained your excitement as you scooted away from the center of the bed to make room for her. She leaned backwards as you did and flopped down to your side, narrowly missing your arm with her head. She didn't immediately move towards you, but instead turned in your direction with her snout inches from your rib cage, her breath barely passing through the thin fabric of your shirt. You were tempted to put your arm down and pull her close, but Fluttershy's words echoed in your mind.
'Don't let what you think influence how you treat her as a friend.'
You held tight to those words, and promised yourself that you would only let things move as they turned out; you'd let Rainbow Dash make her own decisions. The two of you lay motionless in the bed, listening to each others' breathing and the sound of the rain, when she suddenly wrapped her foreleg over your torso and held onto you tightly. The quick movement made you flinch and lean up a bit, but the feeling of her face buried in your side was relaxing, and slowly set you at ease. You could tell by her faint shivering that something was off, and you put a gentle, warm hand on her back.
"Thank you."
She said nothing more, and instead burrowed her face deeper into your shirt. You couldn't quite tell what the reason for her sudden grip on you was, but honestly you didn't care in the slightest. Any opportunity for affection was just fine, unexpected or otherwise. You pulled a pillow down towards her and nudged it against her head, getting her to lift her head just enough for you to slide it under without her leaving contact. Your whole body felt warm as her heat seeped into you, and you relished the sensation. It wasn't an unwelcome feeling; if this was how things would be when you two had time together, perhaps it would be something you could get used to. Something you could come to expect. You laughed to yourself and rubbed your hand in circles on her back as you thought.
Perhaps. |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 13 - Day 10 | You woke up the next morning to the sound of knocking coming from the front door of the cottage. Initially you ignored it, sleepily thinking it was a figment of a dream, but was roused from your momentary doze when it came again with gusto. Fluttershy also stirred next to you, letting out a long, squeaky yawn.
"The sun's not up yet, but I swear I heard knocking on the door. Did you hear it too, Anon?" You hummed in agreement and gave her a gentle on the head before getting up, palming your pouch of cards as you exited the room. Who would be at the cottage at such an early hour?
You inspected yourself briefly before opening the door, hoping you would look reasonably presentable for someone who had woken up less than sixty seconds prior. Apple Bloom was waiting for you on the front step, eagerly bouncing in place and looking up at you with bright, wide eyes.
"G'morning, Anon! Are you ready to get started?" she bubbled. You clumsily pulled a few cards out of your pouch and presented them to her with a yawn.
[It's early.]
"Only about 5:30 in the morning!"
[It's very early.]
"That's what Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle said!" Apple Bloom whined, stomping her hoof in disappointment. "I was hoping somepony like you would be an early riser, but I guess I was wrong." You ignored her condescending tone and covered your mouth as you yawned again in response.
"Who is it, Anon?" you heard Fluttershy ask sleepily, peeking her head down from the stairs behind you.
"It's me, Fluttershy! I came here as fast as I could to pick up Anon so he could help work on the clubhouse today!" Apple Bloom affirmed.
"Don't you think it's a bit... early to do that? You've got him all day, after all."
"I know, but I was thinking we could get started now and have free time later on in the day to do...." Apple Bloom lowered her head as she spoke, tugging on the thickest of your heart strings. You felt obligated to try and reassure her, while still giving yourself an opportunity to get a decent night's sleep.
[We'll work fast.] You took a moment to swap out the cards in your hands once she had read over them. [But I need to sleep first.]
"I understand," she replied, still visibly disheartened. "I'll leave you all alone."
"Don't worry, I'll make sure Anon is at Sweet Apple Acres once he's finished plenty of rest."
"You promise?"
"We promise. Right, Anon?"
You nodded dutifully and put your hand over your heart. Without another word, Apple Bloom strolled away from the door towards Sweet Apple Acres, looking pitiful. Her downcast mood hurt your heart, but you knew that in just a few hours, it wouldn't be a problem; she would be happy to have your help, and you'd be glad to lend a hand. You shut the door and made your way back upstairs, plopping down onto the still warm sheets before Fluttershy stepped inside.
"She really seems excited to get started," Fluttershy commented, sliding back into bed next to you. "You'll probably have your hands full. The Cutie Mark Crusaders can certainly be a rambunctious bunch, but they mean the best." You hummed in agreement.
Within a few minutes, you slipped back into a light rest, which was inevitably interrupted by rays of sunshine peeking over the horizon. Fluttershy made a large breakfast--oatmeal and sliced apples for you, a fruit salad for her--and promptly sent you off to the Apple family farm to get started with your day. You barely recalled how to get there through the thick patch of forest that Applejack had led you through the first time, but with Fluttershy's guidance echoing in your mind as you travelled, you eventually spotted the farmhouse and the nearly-barren trees of their numerous orchards. You could hear the oddly satisfying sound of hooves against cracking bark in the distance. Applejack was probably busy, and so you walked across the plowed fields towards the farmhouse. You saw Apple Bloom and her bright pink bow from afar, bouncing as she spoke with two other fillies on the porch outside. She greeted you by sprinting up to you and essentially wrapping herself around one of your legs, and you chuckled as you playfully tried shaking her off.
"Thank Celestia, I was startin' to think you'd NEVER come!" she squealed, clearly happy to see you. One of her friends, an orange pegasus with tiny wings, snickered and stepped towards you.
"Wow, Apple Bloom, you weren't kidding- he really IS strange-looking." You exchanged looks with the pegasus for a moment, wondering just how much Apple Bloom had spoken about you. She stuck her tongue out at you playfully, to which you responded in kind.
"Hey, that's rude! Even if he is strange-looking, he can still understand us, remember?" blurted out the white unicorn next to her. For some reason, the unicorn filly looked oddly familiar to you, even though you'd never met before. Perhaps you'd seen her in town. Moving on, you reached for your pouch and started arranging your greetings.
[Good morning. It's nice to meet you.]
"Good morning! Are you ready to get to work?" Apple Bloom greeted, raising her hoof into the air. Her two friends also raised their hooves up with wide smiles.
"I'm Scootaloo, by the way," piped up the orange pegasus. "Your name is Anon, right?" You nodded, and reached out your hand to shake her hoof.
"I'm Sweetie Belle! You already met my sister, Rarity. She said you were a nice gentlecolt." The little unicorn's comment made you smile, and you shook her hoof as well. Apple Bloom cleared her throat, and jumped down off of the porch.
"Alright! Now that we're all acquainted and whatnot, it's time to get started!" she announced. "We're gonna start first by having Anon here clear off the broken tree branches off the roof of the clubhouse, while us three clean up what's left on the ground." The list of tasks Apple Bloom grew ever longer by the minute, and Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle started to look at one another troublingly as she continued. Eventually, you raised your hand to interrupt her.
[Is all of this really necessary?]
"What do you mean, Anon?"
[I mean polishing the floors and such.]
"That part's important! We need to deal with the splinters we keep getting from the floorboards!"
[And repatching curtains?]
"Do we look like we're made of bits?"
[Why don't you take me there, and I can help figure things out?] You moved on to laying cards in the dirt, hoping the wind wouldn't come and blow them away mid-sentence.
"He's got a point, Apple Bloom. Sure, we've got a lot to do, but we don't need to do it all at once," Sweetie Belle agreed.
"Let's just take a look again. You've been busy all week, and we haven't gotten a chance to meet up together at the clubhouse since Applebuck season started up." Scootaloo added. Apple Bloom rubbed her chin as she thought, and eventually nodded in agreement. The three fillies led you across the farm beyond the bare apple trees to a seemingly random, hilly area, and revealed a clearing that contained the clubhouse. You were shocked at how homely it looked, and how well-supported it was in the tree- it practically stood with all of the tree's weight underneath it, and looked very sturdy. Broken branches littered the area around it, and covered the salmon-pink roof that was definitely missing the shingles Apple Bloom had mentioned the last time you were on the farm.
"Yeesh. It really has been a while since we came out here. But we're here now, at least!" Scootaloo dashed up to the base of the tree, and immediately started picking up and tossing branches away into a pile. Sweetie Belle joined her efforts, picking up bundles of them with her magic and throwing them into the same pile. Apple Bloom turned to you and grinned.
"See? It's not so hard! Besides, you can reach up onto the top of the clubhouse better than we can." You couldn't argue with that logic. You hesitantly stepped up the stairway to the clubhouse, hoping it could support your weight, and stepped up on the tips of your toes to see over the roof. Your arms were barely long enough to reach over and start collecting the branches scattered over it; it would be better if you could climb up, but falling through the roof would certainly put a damper on your efforts to repair it.
"Well, come on! If you're worried about not being able to get up there, it'll keep you up, I promise!" Apple Bloom piped up proudly. "The Cutie Mark Crusaders take pride in our work... when it's not being destroyed by squirrels, that is." Semi-confident in her reassurance, you gripped the edge of the roof and pulled yourself up and over with some effort. You then crossed your legs and started tossing sticks, branches, and leaves off of the roof down to the ground below, careful not to hit any of the fillies working underneath you. You also took the liberty of clearing up the mess of broken shingles left behind from the impacts of branches, and piled them on the deck of the clubhouse.
"That's lookin' pretty good, Anon!" you heard Apple Bloom call out. She was standing thirty or so feet away from the clubhouse, observing the work you'd finished so far. "You got that cleared up a lot faster than we could have!" You heard snickers from below you coming from Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, who quickly returned to their work when they saw you look down towards them. You had a distinct feeling they were conspiring against you, or at the very least keeping something secret from you. They were, of course, children, so you imagined whatever it was, it wasn't worth worrying over. You instead flung one leg over the peak of the clubhouse roof and climbed over to the opposite side, careful not to get stuck in the tree branches that had started growing onto it. You could tell these branches were fairly new, judging by the circular bumps at their bases; these branches had been roughly pruned back once before. The Cutie Mark Crusaders hadn't brought any tools with them so far, so you made do with what you had- you swiftly brought the edge of your flattened hand down onto the branches and cut them away. It was considerably more difficult than the tree you had cut apart at Fluttershy's cottage, since the branches were young, alive, and very sturdy for their small size.
The better part of an hour passed while the four of you worked, focused and intent on finishing quickly, before the three of them started to tire. You weren't exactly sore or exhausted, but a chance for a break to let your arms rest sounded like a good idea. You hopped down off of the roof and steadied yourself as the tree shook slightly under the force of your landing.
"So what are we gonna do during our break, Apple Bloom?" Scootaloo asked, huffing and panting.
"I thought we might start cleaning up the inside of the clubhouse."
"Wait, seriously? I thought you were wanting to take a break!" exclaimed Sweetie Belle in frustration.
"It IS a break! From working outside, at least."
[A real break sounds nice, though.] Apple Bloom sighed as she read your cards, and you gave her a gentle pat on the head.
"I know, I just want to get all this stuff done as soon as possible," she explained, swinging her hoof in the grass idly.
[Why is that? You've been working all week.] Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo walked up to the clubhouse to see what you were talking about.
"That's a good question," Sweetie Belle added, tipping her head to the side. "You came to our houses super early today, wanting to get started before the sun even came up. What's going on?"
"Well, you see... I was sorta hopin' that Anon here would be able to help out, and then after that..."
"He would stay?" Scootaloo remarked, finishing her sentence. The yellow filly nodded and hung her head in guilt, almost making you laugh. It was pretty cute, and it was hard to keep a straight face as you put more cards down onto the deck.
[You could have just asked. I'm not doing anything else today.] Instantly, Apple Bloom jumped up with a bright smile.
"Really? You mean you'll play with us after we're done?"
[So long as these two are okay with it, sure.] You glanced at Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, who were watching Apple Bloom with a mix of surprise and amusement.
"Yeah, we're fine with you hanging out with us, but on one condition," Scootaloo commented with a devilish smile that made yours drop.
"Yup! There's only one way that we'll let you hang out with us," Sweetie Belle added, exchanging looks with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, the latter of whom caught on to whatever plans they were implying. You smiled nervously, wondering what they had in store for you.
[And that would be?]
"Join the Cutie Mark Crusaders!" all three of them shouted gleefully. It took a few moments for you to register what they had said, and you wiped imaginary sweat off of your brow, grateful that was all they had in mind. You gave them a short nod of approval, which prompted them to huddle together and start whispering amongst themselves.
"Alright, come inside with us, then. There's some stuff we have to talk about, first," Apple Bloom announced, opening the door to the clubhouse. All four of you walked inside, and you had to duck to avoid hitting your head on the way through the doorway. The interior of the clubhouse was surprisingly neat, save for a fine layer of dust on the floor and a few pieces of furniture- a table and a few chairs scattered around it. Across the walls were many marker and crayon drawings: maps of places in Ponyville (and a few that weren't), plans on various, clearly elaborate tasks to help other ponies get their cutie marks, and more to-do lists than you imagined such young fillies ever needing. One such list read "New CMC Membership," which was, to your dismay, longer than any other on the wall.
"Do you swear to uphold the Cutie Mark Crusader code, and to the best of your abilities help each and every colt and filly you find?" You'd lost track of time listening to the three of them read off the massive code they had developed, and sat patiently with your chin in one palm and cards in the other.
[I guess.]
"Don't be so wishy-washy!" Scootaloo insisted. "We might only be fillies, but we're very serious about helping anypony we can, and anypony who comes to us for help." Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle both matched her intensity as they watched you, and you nodded with faux confidence. You weren't entirely certain that any residents would immediately come to you for help just because you bore the Cutie Mark Crusaders' emblem, but you humored the fillies anyway.
"If that's the case, then put your, uh, hoof?" Sweetie Belle began, looking at your hands with mild confusion.
[Hand.]
"'Hand.' Put your hand over your heart. You can't speak, but just think with us, then."
"Hello? Are y'all in there?" Outside, you all heard Applejack calling from below the clubhouse. Applebloom rushed to the window and hefted it open.
"We're here! We were just indoctrinatin' Anon into the Cutie Mark Crusaders!" Apple Bloom shouted back.
"You're doin' what to him?"
"He's with us, now!" You heard an amused snort come from the farm pony and stepped towards the window, hunched over to look outside.
"They're not botherin' you none, are they Anon? I came mostly to make sure you were alright," she joked. You shook your head and smiled warmly. "Well, I'd like to talk to you alone for a bit, if you don't mind." Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo let out a childish 'ooOOOooo,' followed by giggles as you walked out the door and down to Applejack, who guided you towards the farm. Once you were both out of earshot, she nudged you behind a tree and looked you in the eyes with a concerned smile.
"Tell me somethin,' and I know you can with those cards of yours," she began, poking at your pouch. "Why did you come out here to help my sister and her friends?"
[I agreed to help them.] It seemed like a simple enough question to answer.
"I get that, but what's in it for you? They're just fillies, there don't seem to be much reason to help 'em, when you've got more important business to worry about." She made a pretty valid point. It wasn't like you had anything else to do besides loafing around at the cottage when you weren't busy helping Fluttershy with chores.
[I wanted to be nice.]
"Uh-huh." You could tell by her expression that she still doubted your intentions. It was understandable- you'd be protective of your sibling too, if an alien fresh from another world started wanting to hang around them.
[I didn't have much else to do, and she's happy for it.] Applejack locked eyes with you for several seconds, gauging your response.
"Makes sense, I guess. For what it's worth, I appreciate your help," Applejack acknowledged, nodding towards the clubhouse. "Apple Bloom's been workin' her tail off all week to make time for today, more than I've ever seen 'round Applebuck season. Her cutie mark might not be in carpentry, but she sure does love fixin' that clubhouse up."
Applejack continued staring off at the clubhouse as the three fillies inside could be heard excitedly arguing about their next plan of action. You, in turn, looked behind her towards the farm, noticing that there were still plenty of apple buckets left at the bases of the trees in the distance. You snapped your fingers to grab her attention, and pointed towards the orchards.
"Hm? You need something?"
[Do you need help with the trees?] Applejack's nose scrunched as she read your offer, and she looked away from you, half-embarrassed.
"I mean, there's still plenty of work that needs to be done, and I wouldn't ask Apple Bloom to take on carrying that much," she admitted, glancing at the orchards woefully. "I won't lie, we sure could use a pair of hooves--or ten--to help out with the harvest this year."
[Just point me in the right direction.] You gave Applejack a confident grin and pointed with your thumb towards the farmhouse.
"Are you sure? The first time you came by to help out was to repay a debt, you're not obligated to keep workin' for us, now," Applejack questioned, looking you up and down with genuine concern. You nodded curtly, and walked back towards the clubhouse to inform Apple Bloom. When you peeked your head in through the door, you were greeted by a cacophony of high-pitched voices.
"Hey Anon! What do you think of-"
"No, wait, listen to this!"
"Anon, I've got a great idea for-" You held up your hands in an attempt to quiet the three fillies and waited patiently for them to get the message. You pointed first to Scootaloo, who was closest to you.
"I had this awesome idea for helping pegasi who can't fly well, like me. Wanna hear it?" she asked. You shrugged and nodded, curious.
"You're strong, right? What if you tried throwing us?" You immediately held up both arms in front of your chest in a large X-gesture with a serious expression of refusal; there was no way you were going to be responsible for some child's injury because they literally asked you to throw them, in an attempt to help them fly. There wasn't any amount of begging that would convince you otherwise.
"I told you he wasn't gonna be up for it," Apple Bloom chided. "Besides, the catapult didn't work last time, what makes you think that getting thrown would?"
"I wanted to see if he was stronger than that old thing! We all know it wasn't that great." As Apple Bloom and Scootaloo continued to bicker, you pointed to Sweetie Belle, who hopped in place giddily.
"So I was wondering, if you *could* get a cutie mark, what kind would you want?" Sweetie Belle asked, raising an eyebrow. You hadn't actually thought about it, to be honest; without memory of what you used to do, it was hard to consider what you were particularly good at. Sure, you had your strength, and you were more or less resourceful when you needed to be, but those weren't exactly talents. You enjoyed working with tools- maybe Applejack's comment regarding carpentry would be nice. You pulled out your whiteboard and quickly scribbled down a few planks of wood, as well as a hand saw and hammer with nails.
"You want to build stuff?" Sweetie inquired, rubbing her chin. You shrugged again, and wiped away the drawing with the back of your hand. There was always that position Rarity had offered to you, where she had planned to teach you how to make your own clothing. If you were any good at it, perhaps tailoring would be your 'destined' profession. You drew out a spool of thread, needle, and your best attempt at a half-wound bolt of fabric.
"Ooh, that's right, Rarity told me she was going to help you learn how to tailor! I'm pretty good at making clothes myself, you know," she added proudly. You nodded sagely, humoring the little unicorn as she started listing off her beginner experiences with Rarity. Once you were certain that Sweetie's inquiry had been satisfied, you turned to Apple Bloom and snapped your fingers to get her attention away from her ongoing debate with Scootaloo.
"Right, sorry about that, Anon. I was gonna ask you what you wanted to do next, now that we're done cleaning up the place. Do you want to start with the paneling, or re-shingling the clubhouse?" You held up your hand to her with polite dismissal, and pointed outside with your thumb.
[I'm going to help Applejack with the harvest.] Apple Bloom gasped loudly and puffed out her cheeks at you in frustration.
"But you said you would help us! Why'd you change your mind?" she complained. Her frustration was justified, and it would be a good idea to try and explain the situation lightly.
[There's a lot of work to be done.] You let her read the cards, and held up your hand again for a moment as you reached for more. [I'll be back when I'm done.] Apple Bloom seemed to calm down after reading your message, but she still sat down and turned away from you with a huff, clearly upset.
"Wait, are you leaving already, Anon?" Scootaloo piped up, looking at you frustratedly. "We only started a little while ago, you're not done yet, are you?"
"Of course not! He promised to help, didn't he?" Sweetie Belle countered.
"No, he's gonna help my sister with Applebuck Season stuff," Apple Bloom huffed, a slight twinge of sadness in her voice. "He said he'll be back, though." The two other fillies exchanged glances and bolted to the door before you had a chance to stop them. They stared you down with scathing expressions of determination, and you thoughtlessly sat down on the couch on the opposite side of the room.
"The first thing a Cutie Mark Crusader should learn is to commit to their promises, Anon," Scootaloo challenged. "Even if you say you're going to come back, wouldn't it be easier for you to finish your work with us first, and then go help Applejack and the others?"
"Girls, hold on a minute," Apple Bloom interrupted.
"Yeah, what Scoots said! You shouldn't bite off more than you can chew!" Sweetie Belle added triumphantly.
"Hold on! Give Anon a break, okay?" Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle stopped their shouting at you and looked over towards Apple Bloom, who was watching you carefully. "He didn't break his promise, and I know for a fact that he's not overworking himself. I watched him heave that old plow in the fields as long as Big Mac can." She trotted up to you and patted your knee gently.
"It's not a big deal, right? You're just helpin' out everypony out that you can, like normal?" she asked sweetly. For some reason, the little earth pony sounded a lot like Fluttershy to you, with her gentle tone and calm expression. "Fluttershy told us you can't help but help ponies, even if you don't know them that well. She said it's who you are."
[When did she say that?]
"Before you came to work with us on Sunday, when she came over to get those tools from us." You nodded your head slowly, the gears inside starting to click into place. It seemed that your reputation had already preceded you. Moreover, Apple Bloom was very understanding of the situation and your seemingly sudden change of heart, compared to her friends. You gave them a sidelong glance as they stepped forward from the door sheepishly.
"I suppose that was a bit hasty of us, wasn't it?" Scootaloo admitted.
"Yeah, sorry about that, Anon. We got the wrong idea," Sweetie Belle apologized. You reached over with both hands and gave their manes a gentle ruffle, accepting their apology. It was an honest judgement on their part, even if it was a mistake. You exchanged nods with Apple Bloom, and stood to head out the door, when you felt a gentle tug on the back of one of your pant legs. The yellow filly had promptly followed you to the door, and you could see her gripping to you with her teeth. She stepped back, and looked up at you with her trademark puppy-dog eyes and a pleading smile.
"Would you mind if we came and watched, Anon? We're not exactly strong enough to carry much, but it's better than sitting out here and doing nothing."
"We don't have to sit out here doing no-" Sweetie Belle quickly muffled Scootaloo's argument with a hoof and flashed you a brief grin, before whispering something you couldn't understand to the orange pegasus that quieted her down. You couldn't imagine why not, and gestured for Apple bloom and her friends to follow you as you stepped out the door. You held it open for them, and watched them race off towards the fence Applejack was waiting next to.
"Wait, hold on just a second- are ALL of you comin' to help out?" Applejack blurt out as all four of you walked up to meet her.
"Yup! Anon told us we could come watch while he carried stuff!" Scootaloo explained.
"We're here to make sure he makes good on his promise to Apple Bloom!" Sweetie Belle giggled, nudging your calf playfully. Apple Bloom's ears folded back a bit as she kept whatever she originally had to say to herself. Applejack looked between her and you for a few seconds, and sighed.
"Well, so long as you're not bein' a bother, I don't mind either. Just try to help out if you can, or make sure to stay clear if you can't, alright?"
"Yes, ma'am!" Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle replied politely. You chuckled as Applejack shook her head and led you all to the orchards. It didn't seem like she was accustomed to having their help often, but she did say she wanted multiple pairs of hooves, right? And your hands, of course. Applejack stopped at the nearest apple tree with four buckets beneath it, and turned towards you.
"Normally we use a cart to carry these around, or even carry em on our backs, but this year's harvest has been a pain and a half to get cleared up," Applejack began, wiping her brow. "I don't mean to brag, but as strong as we farmponies are, even we've got limits. I reckon your help would be greatly appreciated, even if it's just a few buckets of apples here and there." You stepped forward and grabbed one bucket by its handles, and found it to be surprisingly light for its size. Of course, it was light to you, the mysterious other-worldly creature that could lift a whole iron plow. You shifted the bucket to only one hand and held it at your side, while reaching for a second with your now free hand. You had to hold the far handle of the buckets and prop them against your hips, but they were steady enough for you to walk around and carry.
"Looks good to me. I'd have the cart here, but Big Mac's usin' it right now. I'll show you where to take those apples, and we'll get started." Applejack promptly walked in the direction of the barn, looking behind her to keep an eye on you and the three little ponies dogging your every step.
"I bet you could carry a lot more than that," Sweetie Belle remarked. "You lifted up those buckets like they were nothing!" You nodded- they did have heft to them, but they were more awkward to carry around than they were heavy. "I bet if you had magic to help you carry them around, you could lift a whole ton of apples!"
"It's too bad you don't have magic strong enough to help him carry them," Scootaloo teased, sticking out her tongue.
"I'm working on it!" Sweetie Belle retorted, firing back with her own extended tongue. "Besides, my magic doesn't need to lift heavy stuff, it's more precise and accurate that way."
"Anon doesn't really need magic, though. He's fine carrying just a few. What matters is that he's helping," Apple Bloom interjected, apparently trying to sound as adult-like as she could. It was obvious enough to strike Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo as odd, judging by their confused faces. They whispered more to one another, eyeing you as you watched them in your peripheral. Moments later, you had arrived at the barn, and followed Applejack inside to one corner full of stacked baskets of apples.
"You can set the baskets around here. Just be careful not to let the baskets slip into one underneath 'em, or you'll crush those apples somethin' awful," she instructed. You followed her guidance, and turned to one side to gently set down one basket, then the other. You inched them side-to-side to make sure they were lined up, and stood back to examine them one final time.
"Good job. You can go back and start bringing back baskets from wherever you want. If you need me, just holler, or send one of these girls after me." With a wink, Applejack left the barn and trotted off towards the remaining apple trees. You walked off in another random direction to find more baskets of your own, and tuned out the conversation of the Cutie Mark Crusaders behind you.
As with all children, boredom eventually sank in for the three fillies, and soon enough you were carrying not only baskets of apples at your sides, but also one pony for each shoulder and another atop your head. As you made another trip towards the barn, you wondered how they had ever convinced you this was a good idea; Scootaloo held onto your head loosely as she chatted your ears off, while Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle spared your ears by riding along silently. A quick glance told you that Sweetie Belle was almost to the point of falling asleep, while Apple Bloom appeared to be spacing out, watching something off in the distance as you walked. You might have been plenty strong, but this certainly was an exercise in control, teaching you how to keep otherwise squirming, boredom-afflicted fillies balanced while carrying a heavy load.
"What in tarnation- Anon, what are you doin'?" You heard Applejack cry out behind you, dumbstruck. "I'm not callin' you a pushover, but why on Celestia's green pastures are you carryin' those girls on your back for!?" Apple Bloom instinctively stiffened and gripped your shoulder tightly, and you could see her blushing out of the corner of your eye. You set down the buckets at your side and reached for your pouch with a calm smile.
[I offered to carry them.]
"Now what did you do that for? They can walk plenty fine by themselves."
[They were tired.] You stifled a laugh as Applejack rubbed her forehead in mock frustration.
"I suppose I can't say that's a bad idea, but you could have just left em at the farmhouse, you know? You don't need to cater to them none." You gave Applejack a curt nod and stuffed your cards away to sort later. You then stooped to pick up the baskets again, careful not to let the fillies slide off. The motion woke Sweetie Belle up, however, and you felt your chest tighten as she let out an adorable, squeaky yawn.
"I didn't fall asleep, I was just concentrating," she fibbed cutely, looking towards you with a drowsy grin. To your surprise, you felt her lean her head towards your face and rub against it affectionately, almost making you drop the baskets you were preparing to stack up in the barn. Apple Bloom noticed the break in your concentration, and leaned forward to see what was going on past the other side of your neck.
"What are you doin', Sweetie Belle?" Apple Bloom questioned, prompting Scootaloo to lean down and look as well.
"What?" Sweetie Belle retorted, puffing out her cheeks defensively.
"I'm asking why you're rubbin' all over Anon like some kinda cat or somethin'."
"You're not jealous, are you?" Scootaloo joked, rubbing your forehead with her tiny hoof. "I'm sure Anon doesn't mind at all, does he?" You felt blood rush to your cheeks as you struggled to think of an appropriate answer. You still hadn't figured out this whole thing about rubbing and petting and whatnot with ponies, and the fact that it was troublesome with even kids bothered you more than it should have.
"Now look at him! It looks like he minds plenty!" Apple Bloom argued turning very close to your face. You gently pushed her and Sweetie Belle back and held up your free hand in defense. Before they could continue, you scrambled for your pouch.
[I didn't say that. But it's strange.]
"What's strange about it?" Sweetie Belle asked innocently before rubbing your cheek again. "It's nice, isn't it?"
"No, it's weird!" Apple Bloom protested, firmly slamming her hoof into your shoulder before realizing what she'd done. "Oops, sorry about that." You waved her concern off, unbothered by her strike.
[It feels weird, yes. You're just kids, you shouldn't be doing that.]
"We're not just kids, Anon," Scootaloo argued haughtily, leaning down and making her most mature-looking face possible. "We're young mares in the making!"
"Besides, I didn't mean anything by it, silly," Sweetie agreed, prodding your cheek. "I was just trying to see if I could get a reaction out of Apple Bloom."
"A reaction? What kind of reaction?" the yellow mare retorted.
"That kind," Scootaloo laughed.
[So touch is important to some ponies, then?] You held up the cards to Sweetie Belle, wondering if you'd get a different answer than from Fluttershy. Deep down, you felt strange trying to ask about that kind of topic with fillies like them, but you convinced yourself it was alright to try and get an otherwise unbiased opinion.
"It depends, really. Some ponies like that kind of attention, and others don't. It's not really anything special," Sweetie Belle mused. She looked towards Apple Bloom with a sly grin. "SOME ponies REALLY like it, though."
"What do you know, Sweetie Belle?" Apple Bloom shot back viciously. You could practically feel the fire coming from her eyes. "What makes you think I want that from Anon?"
"You wouldn't stop talking about Anon all week! It's all we've heard about at school!" Scootaloo chimed in, leaning even farther forward. You felt her starting to lose her balance, and instinctively held out your hands to catch the little pegasus as she slid off of you, frantically waving her hooves in the air. Her sudden fall silenced all three of them, and she looked at you curiously, upside-down in your grasp as you walked out of the barn. You could feel Apple Bloom shaking as you placed Scootaloo back atop your head, and you reached over to gently place your hand on her head. She initially shirked away from your touch, but let her head lift to its normal position and into your palm after a few moments.
"It's nothin' weird, okay?" Apple Bloom mumbled. "I just think you're really cool, and I was excited to have you come over again." She refused to look up at you, but you could tell by the way her eyes darted around that she was troubled. Deep down, you wondered what part of you, aside from being a completely alien creature, warranted such interest.
[Why's that?] It was a simple question, one with what you hoped would be a simple answer. The filly continued to look around, searching in the air for an answer.
"Because you are cool, duh!" Sweetie Belle interrupted, throwing her forelegs out in front of herself. "Who else wouldn't want to get to know you better?" Her blunt answer made you laugh for a moment.
[You really think I'm cool?]
"Of course! You might be just a human who showed up out of nowhere, but we've heard that you're really nice, and you always try to help ponies when you can," Scootaloo commented, righting herself on your head as she spoke. "You fit right in with the other cool ponies here, as far as we know." You glanced back to Apple Bloom, who nodded quickly in agreement. It almost looked like she was going to cry, but you couldn't figure out why. You thought back to Fluttershy, who was similarly sensitive to conversations like these. If what she'd said was true, then this situation with Apple Bloom was no different.
[Thank you. I'm happy to help.]
"We're happy to have you here to help," Apple Bloom added sweetly, rubbing her head against your cheek. The gesture made your heart swell, and you reached up to pull her and Sweetie Belle close in an awkward shoulder hug.
"Hey, what about me?" Scootaloo joked. She tapped your head to get your attention, prompting you to reach up past Sweetie Belle and press the orange pegasus down to your skull with your palm. It was a tender, if not strange gesture, but you could tell that the tension in the air had lessened somewhat as a result. Still, you knew there was a bit more resolution to be had. You dropped your arms to your sides and cleared your throat, meeting the gazes of Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. After seeing you dart your eyes towards Apple Bloom multiple times, they seemed to understand what you were getting at.
"Hey Apple Bloom?" Sweetie Belle began. "I'm sorry for trying to get under your skin earlier. I really didn't mean anything by it, I promise."
"Same here," Scootaloo added. "It was only a joke."
"It's alright. It got me to say what I've been wantin' to say, I guess."
An awkward silence grew between you and the three fillies, prompting you to pick up the buckets beside you and continue your work. Said silence was slowly replaced by idle chatter over and across your head as they discussed schoolyard drama, homework, and Cutie Mark Crusader business. Another hour passed, and your aching legs had convinced you that you had found just about all of the apple buckets you possibly could- or could hope to, at least. You sat down to rest at the base of the barn, and lifted off the three fillies so that your neck and shoulders could take a break as well. You stretched out your sore muscles and tried to listen in as they whispered and debated amongst themselves before you. As loud as they could be at times, they were pretty talented at staying discrete as possible, when they wanted to. After a minute of deliberation or so, all three of them simultaneously turned towards you with concerned expressions.
"How tired are you, Anon? And be honest," Apple Bloom addressed you, looking you dead in your eyes. "We don't want a repeat of last time, you hear?"
"On a scale of one to ten," Sweetie Belle chimed in. you lifted your hands, and gauged how sore you were. It wasn't unbearable, but you certainly wanted a chance to rest for ten, maybe fifteen minutes before starting up any kind of work like that again. You held up one hand with all fingers extended, settling on a simple medium.
"A five? After all that?" Scootaloo remarked, looking at the other two with worry. You shook your head defiantly.
[I just need to rest for a bit. Then we can go back to work.] You carefully laid the cards in the dirt, not wanting to scratch them up too badly.
"Are you sure?" Apple Bloom questioned, staring you down with concern. You faltered for only a moment, recalling your last visit. The last thing you wanted was to overwork yourself and have to take another one of those potions, or worse- suffer the consequences, if Applejack didn't have another. You sighed in defeat and shook your head. Apple Bloom hummed to herself before turning around to pull Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo into a huddle. You couldn't make out their hushed deliberations, so you closed your eyes and waited patiently for them to finish.
"It's decided, then," Apple Bloom piped up, garnering your attention. "You go ahead and rest for today, Anon. We've talked it over, and we think that we can finish up working another day, just the three of us."
"Don't feel bad though! As a member of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, we'll make sure you have plenty more to do." You weren't really sure how to feel about Scootaloo's remark, but gave her a thumbs-up anyway. Sweetie Belle started to add something, but was interrupted by a flash of familiar purple light beside you.
"There you are, Anon! I've got great news!" Twilight announced, before curiously looking at your surroundings. "What are you doing at Sweet Apple Acres?"
[I've been helping these three.] You motioned towards the fillies in front of you with a wave of your hand. [What's going on?]
"Princess Celestia's asked for an audience with you tomorrow."
[Why?] You instinctively reached for your necklace, wondering what business Celestia would have with you. [She didn't seem very fond of me before.]
"We can talk about it later, but first we need to get your belongings and get to Canterlot!" Twilight sounded unusually excited, as if she had been looking forward to the trip. She turned towards Apple Bloom and nodded her head with a sheepish grin. "I'm sorry I have to borrow him on such short notice- he shouldn't be gone for too long."
"It's okay! We were finishing up work for today anyway- he's all yours!" You snorted derisively in response to their exchange, although you couldn't help but grin in amusement.
[I'm not a piece of work equipment.] With a brief laugh, Twilight's horn began to glow.
"Goodbye, girls!" Twilight called out as her magic enveloped you.
"Bye!" All three of them chimed in unison. Your gaze met Apple Bloom's for a moment, and you nodded towards her with a wide smile, which she returned in kind. With that, your vision filled with bright, purple light as Twilight's spell teleported you away. |
Speak From the Heart | Chapter 14 - Day 11 | "Goodnight, Anon! See you in the morning!" Twilight called out, shutting the doors to your guest chamber. With a sigh, you flopped backwards onto the unfamiliar bed, careful not to land on the satchel Fluttershy loaned you. You thought about how the past couple hours had gone by in a blur. Twilight had whisked you away to the cottage, insisting that you head to Canterlot as soon as possible, but refused to tell you or Fluttershy what the cause for Celestia's summons was.
"I don't like keeping secrets, but I promise that it'll be worth going," she had said with an unusually radiant smile. Not that you had any reason not to trust Twilight, of course. It just seemed strange that she wouldn't even hint at what Celestia wanted to discuss with you tomorrow. Fortunately, you had been waiting for a chance to meet with Celestia again for some time now- maybe your plans to show her you meant well had come to fruition, after all. Fluttershy had seemed to think so, as well, having gently pressed Twilight about the topic while you packed away your single change of dress clothes.
Once you had prepared, Twilight had teleported the two of you directly to the entrance of Canterlot castle, much to the castle guards' dismay. Apparently, they had already been informed that you would be arriving, but you could tell they were slightly off-put by your alien presence as Twilight guided you through the halls. You did your best to focus not on their wary gazes, but on Twilight, who cheerfully explained the history of how Canterlot came to be. You'd expressed interest in seeing the city itself after the meeting, only to be shot down. In a discussion earlier in the day, Twilight explained, Celestia had emphasized that you were to be transported directly to and from the castle. While you had permission to move about Ponyville, that was all she was willing to allow for the time being. A quiet dinner and a few more history lessons later, and Twilight showed you to the guest chamber reserved for you, apologizing for her 'lecture' going on for so long. You hadn't minded it at all- it was much more engaging than sitting around doing nothing, as you were now. You absentmindedly slipped off your shoes as you stared out the chamber window at the night sky, still thinking about the day to come. As drowsiness started to overcome your senses, you hoped that Twilight would be right, that everything would turn out just fine.
"Come on, Anon! I know you're faster than that!" Fluttershy called out, flying just out of your reach. You had been trying to catch her in your game of Tag under the midnight moon, chasing her here and there around the garden behind the cottage. You couldn't recall having this much fun in your life, and Fluttershy seemed to be having a great time, too; who knew Tag could be so exhilarating? It was difficult to keep up with her, as fast as you were running, whenever Fluttershy would bank suddenly and fly in the opposite direction, occasionally tapping the top of your head or otherwise teasing you while staying far enough away to avoid your retaliatory swipes. You laughed and leapt up high after the mare, hoping to snatch her out of the air. You managed to catch her off-guard, and tucked her close to you as you sailed back towards the ground with her in your clutches. You slid across the soft grass without a care, the two of you giggling uncontrollably as you held her up in your arms. You had anticipated the landing to hurt, but you couldn't feel a thing .
Eventually, your laughter died down, and you opened your eyes to see Fluttershy had stopped moving completely. For that matter, everything had become suddenly still- the leaves blowing through the air had frozen in place, the creek had fallen eerily silent, and Fluttershy stared down at you lovingly, although unmoving. You tentatively let the mare go, and allowed her to float mid-air above you, as if held aloft by invisible strings.
"Do not worry, human," a deep, feminine voice soothed behind you. "I come here in peace, and wish to speak with you." You tilted your head backwards to see Princess Luna slowly hovering in the air behind you, descending to the grass silently. You blinked a few times, and realized what was going on.
"You are, indeed, dreaming, Anon. As princess of the night, the realm of dreams is my domain, and I can see those of any pony I wish." Her statement confused you, as you were clearly not a pony, and Luna gave you a warm, understanding smile. "You appear as astonished as I was when you first slept in Equestria. Yes, that was certainly an interesting experience, to say the least." You instinctively reached for your pouch, only to find that it was absent from your waist. You apprehensively tried to speak, but found that only unintelligible nonsense left your lips, as per usual.
"It is unfortunate that you are still unable to speak, as it has been in all of your past dreams," Luna commented, frowning sympathetically. "I had hoped that your alternative method had crossed over, at the very least." You were even more confused now; if you were conscious in your dreams, couldn't you just magically find your pouch at will? Wouldn't you be able to speak, as well?
"Unfortunately not, my dear human. The mind can only project what it remembers how to do, and what it remembers best of those whom it belongs to." Hearing Luna interrupt your thoughts made you jump in surprise, and she stepped forward to comfort you.
"My apologies, Anon. You are not accustomed to having your thoughts read, nor are any others I approach in this state. I did not mean to scare you, but to educate you." You nodded, acknowledging her apology. You weren't that worried, but it made you slightly uncomfortable. You glanced back towards Fluttershy, and felt that level of discomfort rise dramatically- you couldn't remember any of your dreams after coming to Equestria, but how many could Luna recall?
"Do you want an honest answer?" Luna asked bluntly, now standing over you. You hesitated to answer, but your curiosity got the better of you, prompting you to nod slowly. Luna bent her neck down and hovered over your face with a coy grin.
"Every. Single. One. I know just about everything you do about Fluttershy's 'interactions' with you. And I must say, you have quite the guilty conscience." You covered your face defensively, unwilling to admit that she was right. Even though you were caught up in the moments before she arrived, you could recall the exact feelings you had experienced; it didn't seem unbelievable that this instance hadn't been the first time. But why, then, had Luna shown up only now to meet you?
"I came here to speak with you personally, to understand your perspective of this world, without fear of judgement by Twilight Sparkle or my sister," Luna whispered in your ear, sending a chill up your back. You felt another sensation crawl up your back and envelop your whole body as you were lifted carefully to your feet. "Please, human, walk with me. There is much I'd like to discuss with you."
"Alas, where should I begin?" Luna mused, leading you across the bridge over the nearby creek. "There's so much I'd like to ask, and I'm sure there's plenty on your mind as well, Anon." You thought about her earlier comments regarding how she was the ruler over the 'dream' domain.
"Ah, yes. Since times of old, my sister and I have ruled over a number of lands, both physical and not," she began. "We represent, no, embody the dualities of this world. The sun and the moon, day and night. Those are obvious. We differ, however, in how we watch over and care for our respective domains. As many of Equestria's citizens sleep at night, I uphold the duty of seeing over their wellbeing in their dreams." To you, that sounded rather intrusive. Were all dreams ponies had like this?
"I can understand your concern, but I assure you that I do not intervene in the dreams of my little ponies as I am now. Not usually, that is," Luna replied, winking at you. "I do step in when I see fit, but almost never in my usual form. I use my magic to influence the dreams of those who are distressed. Worried. Terrified beyond belief." She craned her head upwards and looked towards the enormous moon in the sky.
"While our citizens may appear to be cheerful and carefree at any given time, there is much to be said about the stresses they suffer from day to day. Some that those such as yourself dare not imagine." Even if you couldn't remember your own personal history, you could recall faint memories of tragedies on Earth. Earthquakes, hurricanes, wars, and many more disasters. Despite what little you'd seen of Equestria, it wasn't hard to imagine that it had its own share of problems.
"I'm glad to see that you understand. You aren't wholly swayed by the endearing allure of ponies, after all." You chuckled to yourself and gave her a wry smirk; relationships had been a concern of yours for a few days, but surely that wasn't all you thought about. A chilly breeze blew over the two of you as you reached the peak of the hill outside Fluttershy's cottage, and Luna stopped you to point towards the dimly lit houses of Ponyville.
"I jest, but I feel you might do well to listen to a word of advice," she continued, looking upon the town with a motherly expression. "Of all the inhabited areas of Equestria, the citizens of Ponyville might be some of the most considerate. They operate primarily on emotions, and have bonds more tightly-knit than the strongest cords imaginable. Many of them fervently care for one another, and often show little hesitation to extend that care to those in need." You watched Luna as she spoke, noticing what looked like the Cloudominium floating in the far distance. She turned her head towards the cottage for a few moments before turning to you, snatching up your attention with her cerulean eyes.
"You've spent naught but a fortnight in this town, and already the townsponies speak of you openly, and positively. Few of them know you, but your selfless acts have indirectly set expectations of you in their minds." You couldn't resist matching her smile; you hardly knew Luna, but she gave off an aura that made you feel as if she had been watching over you for the longest time, like a godmother, of sorts. "I've read over Twilight's reports about you and what you've done, and I can tell that you will be welcome in Ponyville. I do worry, however, about the affections you and a certain few ponies share." Her expression didn't waver in the slightest, but you could pick up on her concern from the way her tone of voice shifted. You were well aware of the stress your far-reaching conclusions you had jumped to had caused, and hearing the concern of another--especially that of a royal--was strangely relieving. You felt thankful that you were not the only one who knew your feelings.
"I should clarify, I do not know individual details of your interactions, dear Anon, aside from those about which Twilight has spoken to us." Luna explained, starting to walk towards town once more. "But I have observed your dreams, and seen what troubles you. You worry about the consequences of what would otherwise be happy misunderstandings, and wonder where your feelings lie. Am I correct?" As much as you didn't want to admit it, Luna had boiled down your worries to their very core. You were just a human without tangible connections to both Earth and Equestria, and yet you struggled to fight the seemingly misplaced kindling feelings that burned within you. As far as you were concerned, the romantic gestures of little ponies should have been far from the forefront of your problems, but they remained there nonetheless.
"My concern does not stem from the fact that you are human. It would stand to reason that, with what my sister experienced millennia ago, I should have no reason to trust you, but I know that you are different. No, I fear for you because you will face a difficult choice in the future, only made worse by your broken memories." You looked at her in dismay- what kind of choice was she describing?
"We will speak of this again tomorrow, but I will ask you one question on the matter." She spoke sternly, as if she were preparing herself for her next sentence. "Do you wish to return home, Anon? To return from whence you were stolen away by Discord's magic?" You took a deep breath as you registered Luna's question, the one topic you'd been trying to avoid most of your time in Equestria. It was distressing to think about, solely because you didn't want to think about it. You couldn't think about it, even; attempting to recall your past, even your own name, only made your head ache and throb. Up until this point, avoiding the issue of returning to Earth had actually been beneficial, in its own way.
"Normally, one would consider your efforts to disregard returning to your world a feeble attempt at escaping your past. But I am as knowledgeable on that as you are, and I sympathize with your pain." You could see the weariness in Luna's eyes as she gazed up at the moon again. She looked as if she had more to say.
"I do not know, has Twilight informed you about my past with my sister?" You couldn't recall Twilight speaking much of Princess Luna, and shook your head. A bittersweet smile spread on her face, and she resumed eye contact with you as you both continued to walk.
"Long ago, I let jealousy overwhelm me, transform me into a horrible monster whose goal was to enshroud all of Equestria in night. I do not exaggerate; I truly became a different being. My sister was forced to banish me, then known as Nightmare Moon, to my namesake, where I stayed for a thousand years. Nightmare Moon eventually returned, embittered by her imprisonment, and intended to bring about her plans once more, but was stopped by Twilight Sparkle. I can tell from your expression that there's plenty more you wish to hear, but bear with me this once.
"I was transformed by the power of the Elements of Harmony, wielded by Twilight and her friends, and returned to the form you see now. I sought the forgiveness of my sister and all of her people, and to this day I strive to keep it. But much changes in a thousand years, and I, like you, felt alien in Equestria. The place I helped create, of all places, was an entirely different world to me. Even Celestia was changed by her decisions from that fateful day she was forced to expel her own sister from the world, and I truly felt alone." Hearing Luna's story made you want to reach out to her, but you restrained yourself. At the very least, you knew she could feel your sympathy and understanding. The scope of such struggles between divine beings was beyond you, but anyone could start to imagine what it must have felt like.
"Also like you, I found an unexpected friend in Fluttershy. When we first met, she was practically terrified of me, but with time grew accustomed to my archaic ways and even helped me to become the mare I am now." Luna's eyes shone as she continued, and her face radiated relief as she mentally relived sweet memories. "No pony could embody kindness more than her, and she is a gift to all of her friends." You agreed wholeheartedly that Fluttershy was easily the most considerate pony you'd ever met, hands down. It seemed just like her to try and befriend someone like Princess Luna, even after her alter ego's melodramatic attempts at taking over the world.
You and Luna both approached the edge of town, and you continued to follow her as she led you through the streets surrounding the outermost buildings. Once again you could see Rainbow Dash's home, floating peacefully in the air.
"Your dreams are often centered around Rainbow Dash, as well. Did you know that?" Luna giggled as you fought the sudden, strange feeling that washed over you, just at the mention of her name. You wished that you could remember your dreams half as well as Luna could.
"Do not worry, your dreams of Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash are nothing to be embarrassed about, I assure you," she said calmly. "One of my peers--another princess--who lives in a distant land would actually be very interested in them, come to think of it." You couldn't begin to imagine why. You weren't sure why Luna was bringing those dreams up, either.
"I merely felt you would be interested in knowing, as you cannot remember them yourself. You are always such a gentlecolt in them, just as you are in real life. But it would appear that her relationship towards you is different than that of Fluttershy, is it not?" You had to admit again that she was correct; Rainbow Dash had a drastically different attitude toward you than Fluttershy, and not just by her personality alone. Fluttershy had politely brushed off your concerns of romantic interest, but while you had yet to approach Rainbow Dash about them, it seemed likely that you may have been projecting your misguided feelings onto her.
"I wonder, why do you insist that your emotions are... incorrect? Have you not considered that you might be experiencing more than simple infatuation?" Luna pondered, tilting her head at an angle as she spoke to you. Up to this point, you thought, you were sure that whatever emotional interest you had in ponies beyond that of friends was for naught. Again and again, you'd heard about different species on Equestria forming relationships and living happy lives, but it was hard to consider yourself a part of that equation.
"If and when you do make your decision to stay in Equestria or not, I would encourage you to keep that thought in mind, dear Anon. I will not belie anypony's feelings towards you, nor assume yours toward another, but you may find it beneficial to keep an open mind."
Luna's words echoed in your head as you both turned away from the town and approached a small lake you recalled seeing from the clouds once before. Your entire body started to feel fuzzy, almost hazy as you approached its shore, and Luna bowed her head to you politely.
"It would seem that our time here is coming to an end, Anon. I am certain you will awake refreshed and well-rested, and hope you will consider what I have said to you before we next meet." A piercing white light shined from the center of the lake, and gradually consumed your entire field of view, forcing you to cover your eyes.
Moments later, your vision was filled with the sun-lit marble ceiling of your guest chamber. A few sharp knocks from the door rang out clearly, and you could hear it creak open a little.
"I'm here to collect the human, Anon, to take to the throne room. Are you ready to go?" The sound of the royal guard's husky voice roused you from your sleep, and you rubbed your eyes as you swung your legs out of bed. You grumbled your agreement and mentally prepared yourself for whatever the princesses had in store for you. Luna had assured you that it wasn't going to be a terribly stressful ordeal, but you were wary of how Celestia would approach you, even after all you'd done in ten days' time. The walk to the throne room only lasted a minute or so, but with each step you felt more and more tense, uneasy at what would come.
"This way, sir. The princesses are waiting for you inside." You gave the guard a nod as he and another guard opened the large throne room doors, revealing a grand, lofty hall, much longer than the ones you'd seen previously back at the Castle of Friendship. On the far end you could see all three princesses sitting patiently, a hush falling over them as they noticed your entrance. You couldn't help but balk at the grandiose, intricate etchings in the colorful windows of the hall, but did your best to maintain a brisk pace as you approached the throne. You almost missed Luna's gentle, knowing nod as you stopped at the foot of the ramp, and nodded in kind, feeling your chest loosen up a bit.
"Good morning, Anon. It's a pleasure to see you," Celestia's motherly voice called out. She sounded considerably warmer than when you'd last spoken personally. "Let me be the first to say how happy I am to hear that you are well and acclimating yourself to Ponyville and its citizens. Please tell me, how do you feel?" Your first instinct was to reach for your pouch, but you realized that, standing close to ten feet away from her, she wouldn't be able to read the tiny print on the cards.
"You're more than welcome to get closer so that I can read, if that's what you're looking so bashful about," she chuckled lightly. You took tentative steps forward as you searched for the right words.
[I feel foreign, but very welcome.]
"That's good to hear. Ponyville is a good place to go when you're looking to make new friends. Isn't that right, Twilight?" The lavender mare nodded enthusiastically.
"That it is. I couldn't have picked a better place for you to end up myself, even if it was my fault you ended up there in the first place."
"I understand how you feel, Anon; it must be difficult to deal with such a strange situation," Celestia continued, materializing a scroll out of thin air with her magic to study. "But from what I've heard, you've been making strides to make the best of it. Twilight's reports on you have been more than satisfactory, which spurred me on to let you move about Ponyville, with guidance from the Elements."
"Why did you choose us in particular?" Twilight asked. "The choker Anon is wearing is only activatable by unicorns, so only Rarity and I would be able to suppress him if anything were to happen. N-not that anything WOULD happen, of course," she added with a nervous smile.
"I chose you because I trust you, and I was sure that if anypony could inspire Anon to be a good member of our society, it would be the six of you and your friends. You've done so much for Equestria, and are paragons of what all Equestrian citizens should aspire to be." Twilight blushed under Celestia's heavy praise.
"Do you think it would be fair to allow Anon freedom from that trinket, dear sister?" Luna commented, levitating the choker off of your neck to inspect carefully. "I was not present when these were first implemented on the humans you discovered, but they seem rather intrusive." Celestia opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated upon seeing Twilight lean forward and raise her hoof patiently.
"If I may, I'd like to point out that Anon volunteered to wear the choker after Celestia gave him permission to leave Fluttershy's cottage. I gave him the opportunity to take it off and avoid using it." You nodded in agreement with Twilight, earning an intrigued nod in return from Celestia.
"Really? You certainly are a puzzle, Anon. And, tell me, what reason did you have to not only aid Fluttershy in her day-to-day tasks, and Twilight with her research, but other members of Ponyville, as well?"
[I wanted to repay them for their help.]
"And what of the stallion, Patch, who sells vegetables in Ponyville?" Celestia asked, raising an eyebrow. "And the Cutie Mark Crusaders, as well? I'd heard you stepped forward to help them, even as complete strangers." You were surprised that she was even aware that you'd gone to help Apple Bloom and her friends the day before, but you guessed that Twilight had passed on your announcement of your plans to help them clean up well in advance.
[I saw they needed help, so I did.]
"That's very considerate of you. Most of the humans I saw long ago weren't like that. I wonder if Fluttershy's influence has had any affect on you."
"If I may be frank, I think Anon's kindness is genuine," Twilight remarked while shaking her head. "Fluttershy might be a good role model for him, but I sincerely believe that he means the best out of the kindness of his heart." Celestia shot Twilight a look of surprise, and turned back towards you.
"If what you've told me is true, Anon, then there would be good reason for me to believe Twilight. But I'm still curious as to WHY you feel the need to help ponies. You would certainly be more content with staying with Fluttershy and the other elements and waiting for a way to return home, right?" Celestia's tone seemed to be leading, as if she were anticipating a certain kind of answer from you. But you knew the best option would be to answer honestly- it had been a good policy for you this far.
[I hadn't thought about returning, no.]
"You hadn't?"
"Whenever Anon tries to remember his past on Earth, he's wracked with terrible pain. It makes sense that he would avoid the topic altogether," Twilight added.
"I see. But do you not wish to return to Earth, regardless? Surely, being among your own kind would be preferable to living here in Equestria," Celestia suggested. You shook your head adamantly and smiled at Twilight.
[Equestria is my home more than Earth was, as far as I can remember.] Celestia re-read your statement multiple times before staring you down intently. Her eyes burned with an insatiable interest, as if she were trying to gauge your sincerity through eye contact alone.
"Is that so? You really believe that Equestria is your home?" Luna chimed in with a smile.
"One could argue that logic is flawed due to your impaired memory, sentimental as it is," Celestia argued. "My intention was to discover a means of returning you home outright, but it seems that would be a hasty action to take without your consent. You were brought here in the same manner, it's only fair that you be given the opportunity to make an informed decision this time."
"What are you saying, Princess Celestia?" Twilight inquired.
"I'm saying that I would like to pursue a means of restoring Anon's memories, so that he can properly decide on whether to return to Earth, if and when the time comes."
To your surprise, Twilight and Luna looked as taken aback as you did. You hadn't considered the possibility that your memory could be restored before, and to hear such a proposition from Celestia was telling.
"Do you really think we can?" Twilight asked.
"I do. You are well aware that magic can be used to restore memories in ponies; I see no reason why we cannot do the same with dear Anon," Celestia replied.
"Would it not pose any danger to him? I know that field of magic has been and still is a cutting edge when it comes to research," Luna remarked with worry.
"It is. But I believe it is the best option for us at this moment," Celestia concluded. "What do you think, Anon? Is this something you want? To regain your memories?" You hesitated to answer at first; you were still new to experiencing magic, and while your brief history with it thus far wasn't unpleasant, Luna's warning gave you a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach. You were also unsure how to answer because you had absolutely no idea how the process would work.
[I don't know. I'm still unfamiliar with magic.]
"Your doubt is not unjustified- sister, why don't we wait until we have a means of transporting Anon first, as to avoid unnecessary risk," Luna pleaded firmly. "Consider it another choice Anon will be able to make when he is properly knowledgeable of the process necessary." The two of them exchanged glances for a moment, and Celestia let out a calm sigh.
"You make a fair point. I suppose I am asking a lot of you, Anon, but please know that I only mean the best for you. When it comes down to it, I believe that Equestria may not be the best place for you, I won't lie about that." Celestia took a deep breath, and beamed as she continued. "But so far you have made leaps and bounds to prove my past judgements wrong, and I sincerely apologize for holding the past actions of your kind against you. That said, I will continue to pursue means of setting things right as I see fit, and we will meet again when the appropriate day comes. Do you understand?" You bowed in affirmation, earning another nod from Celestia.
"Good. I do believe that I have exhausted my list of business with you, Anon, but please allow the other princesses a moment of your time, if you would." Celestia turned to Twilight, who did a double-take.
"Wait, are you sure that's everything you had to say?" she asked carefully.
"Of course. Was there something you were expecting, Twilight?" Celestia responded, raising an eyebrow and briefly setting Twilight's hair on end.
"N-no, no, I was just making sure." Twilight's eyes darted between you and Luna for a moment before composing herself.
"There was one thing I was expecting, dear sister," Luna chimed in.
"And what would that be?" Celestia questioned, her voice taking on a curious tone.
"Did we not have a discussion about granting Anon citizenship, just the three of us?"
Wait, did she Luna just say 'citizenship?' You looked to Twilight with a stunned expression, who tapped her hooves together in quiet excitement.
"Last I recall, you entertained the notion, albeit with some skepticism," Luna pressed. "If we're on the topic of transparency and informed consent, I feel he should be aware of this, as well." The soaring feeling in your heart was abruptly cut down as Celestia's gaze returned to you. You did your best to not show your nervousness, although it didn't seem to be working. After a few seconds, Celestia looked as if she had realized something and cocked her head to the side.
"You're absolutely right. I'd like to speak with him alone on the matter, however." Twilight and Luna exchanged glances briefly, and stepped down past you. You could hear Twilight whisper 'good luck' under hear breath to you as she and Luna left the quiet hall. Celestia watched the two alicorns leave over your shoulder, and settled back into her throne once the doors shut behind them.
"Anon, be honest with me," she began. "Do I scare you?" What a strange question to ask, you thought, shaking your head.
"You've been very tense since the moment you walked in. Is something on your mind?"
[Not particularly.] You thought for a moment, and became aware of the sweat forming around the choker on your neck. You remembered why you were still wearing it.
[I was hoping we could meet again.]
"You were?"
[Yes. I'm glad we did.] Celestia nodded in agreement and stood up, gesturing with her wing for you to walk with her towards the hall doors.
"As am I. You've surprised me a number of times in the last ten days, and I wanted an opportunity to apologize to you personally."
[Apologize?] Celestia stopped her steady pace and turned to face you with a solemn look.
"I want to be honest with you, Anon. When I first saw you, I felt afraid, angry, and confused, as I did long, long ago. The havoc that humans caused in the past was heartbreaking." she answered flatly. "And when we left that cavern, I treated you like an animal, like a burden, and were it not for Fluttershy's interference..." Her voice trailed off, and you recalled Twilight's story of the previous humans' exile. Celestia noticed your expression and cleared her throat.
"But you've given me reason to believe in you, Anon," she continued, bowing her head with a smile. "During my rule, I've come to learn that everypony deserves a second chance. I misjudged you, projecting onto you the actions of your forebears, much like one particular human from their time."
[Twilight told me about that.]
"I thought so." Celestia lifted her head and continued her slow pace, glancing fondly at the stained glass along the walls before looking back towards you. "But let's change focus for a moment- you know now why I called you here, but you mentioned before that you were anticipating our meeting. Why is that?"
[I wanted you to trust me.]
"Hm? Are you saying you planned for this?" Celestia watched you curiously as you unclasped the choker around your neck and held it out to her. The only reason you agreed to wear it was to prove your trustworthiness to Celestia, after all. She levitated the trinket out of your hand and studied it for a moment, focusing on the gemstone in its center.
"You kept this, knowing that Twilight was reporting your behavior to me, yet you say your actions are purely out of kindness," Celestia concluded. When she put it that way, you sounded considerably less sincere than you had hoped. You looked around the room away from her, trying to think of a response.
"Don't worry, that doesn't change what I said before about second chances," Celestia chuckled. "Your decisions were still good in and of themselves, whether you knew you were being observed or not."
[Thank you.]
"But there is something I'd like to ask of you, first: how much would you be willing to do to be a part of this world? There are the usual examinations for becoming a citizen, of course, but staying in Equestria will, in one way or another, likely take its toll on you. What reason would you have for staying, aside from your lack of memories of Earth?"
You struggled to find a definitive answer; while thinking of what you were missing back on Earth wasn't an option, you had found some purpose in Equestria, either. Already, a few ponies had made concessions for you as if you were already going to stay- an opportunity for work with Rarity, keeping the Cutie Mark Crusaders company, and helping out at Sweet Apple Acres, to name a few. And there were still others, like Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, who you simply wanted to stay with for reasons you hadn't yet figured out.
[I just want to keep helping, I guess.] Several seconds of silence passed as Celestia pondered your response, before her face lit up with inspiration.
"For clarification, Anon, you are still unable to write, correct?" You nodded your head in reply.
"I see. And how much would you say you trust Twilight Sparkle, my former student?" she asked cheerfully. "Surely enough to be monitored daily, right?" she added.
[I trust her, yes. Why do you ask?]
"When Twilight first arrived in Ponyville, I tasked her with writing letters to me, depicting the lessons she learned about friendship. If you trust her enough to write in your stead, I'd like you to do the same."
[May I ask why?]
"As I said earlier, I want you to have an informed decision on whether or not you wish to return to Earth. If and when you find yourself dedicated to something between now and when the day comes for that decision, I want to hear of it. Does that make sense?" Celestia smiled again as you both reached the hall doors, which slowly swung open to reveal Luna and Twilight patiently waiting for you.
[What about the choker?]
"I'm keeping it here," she replied, folding the band up neatly with her magic. "You said you wanted me to trust you, so I want to hear about your life in your words, this time." |
North and South | pre | ===#===
Tempest drug herself into the large command tent that Charm had erected, shaking off her overcoat as she mopped the water and sweat from her forehead with her forage cap - and as Lightning Charm herself gave the bat pony a flat look. "It took you long enough, Brigadier General."
"Apologies, Major General Charm." Tempest nodded, taking the rebuke in stride. "Hard moving out there, the storm's getting worse, not better."
"I know." Charm nodded, frowning - not at Tempest, but at the storm raging outside. "My scouts," She began without preamble, "Don't know what's in front of us for sure; the weather's too poor for that. But we know it's at least as big a force as ours. If not larger."
"So we have guesswork at best, then." Tempest scowled, shaking her head. "Shit. Any chance we can pull back to the Ferry?"
"Not in this weather, Brigadier." Charm frowned, lips turning downwards into a hearty sneer. "Planning on leaving so soon, General Wind?"
"Spare me the theatrics, Major General. No, I'm not planning on quitting the field, I'm trying to think of the realities." Tempest retorted, glaring daggers at Charm. It was clear and evident between the two that they highly disliked each other; Charm viewed her and her Corps as untrained hooligans, and she viewed Charm and her regulars as snobbish pricks. There was no love lost between the two. But, they had bigger issues for the moment. "Let's focus. Do you have a plan? If we're not going to retreat, the closest town is Staunton. They're already across the river, so holding them at the riverline isn't going to happen."
"How familiar are you with the ground around here? My corps just finished marching up; aside from my scouts that found the enemy, I don't know a lot of what's happening down here yet." Charm admitted, accepting the cessation of their feud for the moment.
"Familiar enough, I've been here for about a week." Wind nodded.
"Then you're the commanding officer." Charm bit out, clearly unhappy with the decision. "I'm trusting you with the Regulars, Wind, do not fuck this up." She prodded, jabbing Wind's chest with a wingtip.
"Only way I'm leaving this muddy hole is on a stretcher, Charm. See to your folks, we're going to draw up around Mount Comfort."
"Mount Comfort?"
"There's a Faustian church 'round there, and it'll be more solid ground than Bald Mountain. Walked up there yesterday when the rain started," Tempest began, shaking her head. "Bald Mountain's all mud, and too slick to climb. We'd have to leave all our supplies down at the bottom, and I shouldn't have to explain why that's a bad idea."
"True, and it keeps the fighting away from the townsfolk. Mount Comfort it is. I'll have my corps moved within the hour."
"Can you do thirty? Faster we can get there the faster we can lay the guns."
"We'll see. This is one of the worst storms I've seen for a while." Charm nodded, frowning. "I'll make the attempt."
"That works." Tempest sighed, with a shrug. "Nothin' else for it, let's go see if the flank collapses today."
===#===
The deluge only got worse as the Confederates drew closer to the Equestrian line. It took most of the day, as the Equestrians continued to dig into the muck and mud around Mount Comfort, and the night was a miserable one, as the storm continued to rain terribly upon the battered federal troops.
Around ten in the morning, the rainstorm gave way to a full-fledged thunderstorm, grounding any fliers and sending the troopers ducking for cover with swears and curses against the wild weather. Normally, weatherponies would deal with the obstinate storm, but most of said weatherponies were drafted at the present moment.
One would have to be mad to fight in such conditions; but there were the rebels, marching gamely up the road despite the hellish conditions. And, one could argue, here were the federals, prepared to keep them at bay.
The regulars opened fire first from behind some temporary battlements, as their percussion cap rifles echoed out, barely audible over the rainstorm. Several guns fouled, as their wet powder failed to launch their bullets, but enough shots were leaving barrels to attract the Confederates' attention.
Regulars clashed with regulars, as the Confederate regular army made contact with the Federal main army along the battlement wall. Shots blasted back and forth across the mountainside, as the two armies engaged each other at a spitting distance.
Thunder echoed as the lightning flashed, and Tempest shifted the Federal flank to assist the embattled regulars. Cannons - as little use as they were in such frantic and close-in fighting - sounded out, some of the only audible noise resounding against the maelstrom they found themselves in.
The confederates continued forwards, directly into the federal line, as bayonets were fixed and the shooting match became a brawl, aided by cavalry on both ends of the hill. Sword and pistol met rifle and bayonet, as the federal line frantically shoved the rebels back down the hill, and sent them slipping and sliding through the muck, further down the road.
Her forces cheered wearily, before the Brigadier General rallied them, flashing her saber across the front - illuminated by a distant strike of lightning - "Here they come again, lads! Let's send 'em packin' back to Richmond!"
Again, the rebels struck into the federal line, as rifle shot met rifle shot along the top of Mount Pleasant. Once, then twice, then a third time, the rebels attempted to shove their way not just up the hill to the line's front, but to the sides as well, and each time, they were shakily repulsed by the mixed army of regulars and militia, who bloodily forced the Confederates back down the hill.
It wasn't until near midnight until the rebels finally stopped throwing themselves at the beleaguered federal line, as ammunition finally ran out - and with it, morale. The storm continued late into the morning, and it wasn't until near dawn that the Equestrians even realized that the rebels had finally quit the field, as only the bodies and broken wagons of the Confederate artillery train remained present, at the base of Mount Pleasant.
The Army of Equestria had carried the day. The flank near Harpers Ferry and Whinnychester remained solidly under federal control, and stories of the mare who'd been named after the Tempest she fought through began to circulate the tents.
And, perhaps, just maybe, a step in the right direction had been made to soothe the spite between the volunteers and the regulars. If one squinted, and looked in at an angle.
Brigadier General Wind just hoped that she was worth the Major General's stars that Charm had hoofed over to her, instructing that Her Majesty had seen fit to promote the Brigadier for her Valiant defense of the Equestrian Flank. The egg-sucking scowl that Charm wore throughout the entire announcement made the promotion all the more tolerable, in Wind's estimation. |
North and South | Chapter Seven | June - July, 1861
Coltago was still fairly mild when it came to weather in June, considering its distance to the Northern end of Equestria. Granted at this time of year, mild meant "not eighty degrees out", but Moondancer took the small victories where she could. Her newly sewn uniform was still missing the Major General's rank tabs that she'd been commissioned to, but that was a small issue, same as many of the issues that plagued her new Army Corps at present.
Rifles were still slowly filtering into her slowly mustering force, and her aide de camp - some Lieutenant she hadn't memorized the name of yet - had recorded that the Corps wouldn't finish mustering for roughly a month, give or take a week. She'd need all the rifles she could get, too; her Corps was looking to muster with around 17,000 and some odd ponies, formed into four divisions; two infantry divisions, an artillery train, and a cavalry division.
Tents were trouble, though the city of Coltago was kind enough to sequester as many of her growing army within the city's Town Hall and the constabulary as they could. It was workable - for now - but she really needed the tents, especially with how often it was raining these days. They were supposedly en-route, Moondancer had been told four or five times now, but en-route from where, nopony could seem to tell her.
Regardless of her supply situation though, she had work to do. Her Officers' Cadre was starting to arrive today, and her four divisional commanders would need briefing and a level of standard to begin training their troops - all volunteers - up to snuff. It seemed like most of this new model Equestrian Army was volunteers to her, and Moondancer wasn't very sure how she felt about that.
Three of the four ponies that had arrived in Coltago to compose her general staff, and Moondancer readily recognized them. Anja Snow of Ravenholm, Filip Redglad - originally of Griffonstone, but of Neigh York these days - and Octavia Melody of Ponyville; all three were graduates of the Canterlot Military Institute, and moreso, peers from Moondancer's own graduating class of officers.
Her gaze stopped however, on her fourth divisional officer.
There were only five alicorns in all of Equestria. Twilight and Luna were managing Eastern Virginia's frontage, Celestia was running the country, Cadence was managing her Crystal City in the far North.
And Flurry Heart Di Cadenza Mi Amore, Second in Line for the Crystal Throne, first natural-born Alicorn Foal since time immemorial, was sitting in front of Moondancer, wearing a slap-dashed attempt at an officer's uniform - though idly and distantly, Moondancer noted she was missing both a forage cap and overcoat.
Moondancer paused, having to stop and look again at the bubblegum pink alicorn standing before her, before shooting a look over at the trio of regular officers.
Redglad, very helpful, shrugged and lit himself a cigarillo. Snow just gave Moondancer a lopsided grin, and Octavia at least had the decency to cough and look away awkwardly.
Moondancer sighed inwardly, and nodded to her three schoolmates, before looking Flurry Heart up and down. "Your highness, Lady Flurry Heart; might I ask why you're here? In Coltago, that is. Ma'am."
Flurry simply blinked, visibly confused at the older mare's inquiry. "Oh, well, I'm to be your aide de camp, General Morning." The barely an adult-more of a filly really- replied, snapping off a lackadaisical salute, as Melody poorly stifled a giggle. Moondancer, momentarily off-put by the alicorn mare, shot Octavia a glare, which did nothing but prompt the earth pony mare to stifle more giggles, as Moondancer returned her attention to the awkwardly smiling filly.
"That's not necessary, your highness. I already have an aide de camp. The Lieutenant is very helpful, and I don't really need another camp officer." Moondancer curtly stated, as the filly began to wilt. Oh bother, she'd upset the mini-princess.
"What? That doesn't make any sense. Auntie Tia specifically said that you were still missing an officer." Flurry Heart mumbled, as a sinking feeling settled into Moondancer's gut. She couldn't be serious... could she?"
"And you arrived with these three miscreants?"
"Yes, General." The bubblegum pink mare perked up momentarily, smiling towards the trio - and still maintaining her salute. With an eye roll, Moondancer returned the salute, prompting the young mare to drop her own. "Same train car, even."
"Brilliant. Celestia's drafting children now, we might as well give up the war already." Moondancer groused, as Flurry Heart spluttered in embarrassment and agitation. "How old are you even, kid?"
"I'm twenty! Plenty old enough! And Auntie Tia didn't draft me, I volunteered!"
"You volunteered? I'm surprised your mother hasn't keeled over from a heart attack yet. Or your father for that matter, though I suppose he's been busy out west. Look. You're supposed to be an officer, are you even trained yet?"
"I am, actually." Flurry nodded, scowling at the more caustic Moondancer. "I just finished out around the middle of my class at West Point, two months ago."
"Two- Are you shitting me, two months ago?" Moondancer recoiled, not believing her ears. "And Celestia assigned you to me? Kid, I need a Divisional Officer, not a fresh Second Lieutenant."
"Well I'm what's here, ma'am." The Mare grimaced. "I have official orders and everything. I was expecting to be an aide, not leading a division." Flurry retorted, walking the line between being snarky and being respectful.
"Well... You have orders?" A nod. "Official orders?" Flurry nodded, again. Moondancer held out a hoof, and immediately Flurry passed them along, as the newly minted Major General quickly scanned the document. "Remit listed officer - regimental command - Son of a bitch." She shoved the offending document at the scandalized alicorn, who took it back in her grasp as Moondancer slapped her own forehoof with a kepi. "Well, welcome to the fucking Army of Coltago. I hope you're a quick study, Brigadier General Breveret Flurry Heart; you're leading the First Division of this army. Your first brigades arrive in three days. We'll - shit - we'll figure something out for bivouac today."
"I - oh. I, wh-"
"I'll bring you up to speed tonight with everyone else... You better prepare yourself though, Brigadier General Heart. I'm about to throw you in over your head and it's sink or swim once the brigades start showing up. What the fuck, a twenty year old Brigadier, Faust fucking help us. I didn't realize the war was going that badly already." |
North and South | Chapter Eight | July 7th, 1861
=#===#=
Major General Charm shook her head, as she watched through her field glasses at the Rebels crossing the riverline near Staunton again. The thunderstorm had let up for long enough to allow the ground to solidify, and so Lightning Charm rightly assumed the Confederates were likely to try something again.
Doubly so, Charm assumed, now that Tempest's Corps had completely marched down to Virginia Military Institute and was likely too far away from her own corps to provide support. A pity, but from her own estimation, Charm was looking at a force roughly the same size as her own. For once, her Corps might even outnumber the Rebels - which would be only the second time an Equestrian Army Corps had enjoyed such a boon since the damnable war had begun.
"Alright, we roughly outnumber the enemy force to the tune of around seven-fifty and a few extra cannon in comparison." Charm began, as her officers stood around her command tent's map table. They'd drawn up around Applemattox Court House for the day, with the rebels expected to arrive sometime around eleven in the morning - roughly five hours away. "They're going to be arriving in two split forces - their Army of the Potomac, and their Army of the Fillisee. The army of the Fillisee is going to be two hours behind according to Colonel Spring Rain's cavalry scouts." Charm paused, as Colonels Starry Night and Night Light, both of whom had served alongside her in the Badlands War, and whom she could rely on as excellent Brigade Commanders in battle.
Officers that she would be relying on soon as her Brigade Commanders in such a battle, she reminded herself idly. "We have the better troops, we have the numbers, and we have the good ground. So we will deploy aggressively and forward, taking the fight to the rebels before they can group up and take the fight to us. Brigadier General Clear Water?"
"Yes, General Charm, ma'am?"
"Take Starry and Night Light's Brigades, and push down to West Inge Farmhouse here, south of the Plain Run Branch Creek. Spring Rain, take your cavalry with them, and provide support. I want you to use the Farm as a hard point as the rebels waltz up the road, and push them back as is practical. On the right, near Prince Blueblood Courthouse Road to the East, I want Sunset Shimmer and Cloud Skipper's two brigades to hold Le Grande hill against the Filliseean army coming up the road. They'll have a larger force than you, but you're better equipped and likely to be able to force them back whilst you have ammunition. Artillery will deploy around the Trent and Sears farms, in support of both wings of the line. Any questions?"
"No? Then you are dismissed. Prepare your troops."
=//[]\\=
Colonel Starry Night lit herself a cigarillo as she surveyed her troops, who had taken up defensive lines dug into the split rail fence around West Inge Farmhouse. Night Light's Brigade sat further back down the road itself and by the intersection, where his troops could draw the enemy brigades into Starry's line of fire once they began marching up the dirt road towards the Court House.
The rebels were undoubtedly marching up the road towards them with their smaller force - hence the smaller force she'd been nudged into with Night Light to counter them, whilst Sunset Shimmer and Cloud Skipper took the larger force east to check the main Confederate advance.
"Here they come, Colonel, ma'arm." One of her Sergeants muttered, readying his Sharps Rifle between his hooves as the Confederates finally came into view marching gamely up the road.
"Hold fast, everypony." Starry cautioned, gesturing for the brigade to stay low with her officer's saber. "Remember, we want them to pass us in favor of Night Light's folks. Hooves off the triggers, and keep quiet."
The rebels, thankfully, did end up bypassing Starry's line - there really wasn't too much worry of them not doing so; Starry's troops were quiet, behind a thick fence, and set fairly far back from the road the Confederates were using. Thus, they easily fell into the trap the two brigades had laid for them.
Night Light's own Sharps rifles began to crack out with fire as the Confederates hooped and hollered, pushing themselves into a frenzy as return musket fire echoed towards Light's brigade. With a nod, Starry flashed her officer's saber, and addressed her ponies: "Up guns, and at'em!"
With a hearty cheer, her troops stood up and clambered over the split-rail fence they'd been covering behind, unfurling their battle flag and letting it fly freely as they double-quicked up the road and to the side of the advancing rebels. Readying a volley from their quick-firing Sharps rifles, Starry's troops shot out an accurate and withering volley, before slapping open breeches and cartridge boxes to keep up the bloody fire. Off to Starry and Night Light's right, Spring Rain's cavalry was holding off another brigade all on their own, and though outnumbered about two-to-one, were gamely giving their foe as good as they got.
The rebels quickly broke, suffering heavily from the repeated and witheringly accurate fire put out by Starry and Night Light's troops, and the two brigades allowed them to withdraw - instead rushing over to help Spring Rain's cavalry see off the other rebel brigade.
=//[]\\=
Over on the right, Sunset Shimmer's own large Brigade had drawn up atop the Le Grande hill with Skipper's infantry in support to her north and a bit further down the hill. The rebels were marching straight up the Courthouse road towards them, and Sunset's Whinnyworth armed troops were well prepared to receive the rebels if they were of the incorrect assumption that they could take Le Grande Hill and overturn the Equestrian left. Major General Charm herself stood somewhere behind Colonel Shimmer with the rest of her staff, watching cautiously from behind the crest of the hill as the rebels strayed into the longer range of her whinnyworths.
"Sharpshooters, fire at your leisure." Sunset began, deploying her skirmishers forwards. "Infantry, hold for four hundred yards, bottom of the hill." The unicorn mare continued, watching the proceeding Confederates as her skirmish line and Skipper's infantry began to fire on the rebels in concert with each other.
The Confederates continued forwards under enemy fire however, and once they hit the base of the hill, Sunset's main line of infantry began to put down withering volley after withering volley at the confederates. Whilst her troops' rifles were slower to load and shoot than other rifles or muskets, their accuracy and range more than made up for the increased loading time as rebel after rebel fell dead or injured.
Night fell a touch early, around seven thirty or so, and the rebels withdrew along with it, not interested in continuing the fighting.
And that suited Sunset just fine. |
North and South | Chapter Nine | July 24th, 1861
Our men fought bravely, but the enemy repulsed me. Many valuable lives were lost. Our God was my shield.
===#===
The rain of earlier June had given way to the warmth and windiness of late July, as Flurry Heart and her company commanders began to drill their troops. The Army of Coltago was getting close to being ready to march if the quartermasters' reports were any indication, but there was still, as Major General Moondancer constantly reminded her staff officers in their daily meetings, plenty of drilling and practice to get in before they marched south.
Somewhere out there, her Aunt Twilight was fighting on the front line, making a name for herself alongside the other storied greats of the Union Army; of Lightning Charm, whose age had not tempered her ferocity in the slightest; of Tempest Wind, who was slowly gaining a reputation as a darling of the gutter press, taking several interviews and polarizing thoughts around her in one way or another - though her effectiveness in the fighting kept such bipartisan thoughts reasonably positive. Trixie Lulamoon and Princess Luna were out there too; Princess Luna ran the entirety of the Union Army at present, outside of the small Western Theatre, and General Lulamoon was busy keeping Aunt Twilight's flank safe and secure. And then of course her Father, Shining Armor, was off in the West, supporting Macintosh Apple, who'd taken the nominal head of the theater himself. Reports from the West were sparse, and slow - and it seemed like very little was currently happening over there - which was fine with Flurry. Better for her Father to be as safe as he could be, with a war going on.
Shaking herself out of her reverie, Brevetted Brigadier General Flurry Heart continued signing off on her latest requisition forms - marching shoes today - as her division practiced with their rifles, shooting at targets ranging roughly four hundred yards away. They were getting to be better shots the longer they sat in camp, and their marching and battle-movement was passable. Another month or so, and they'd likely be ready for a fight.
It wasn't like there was any lack of fight ready for them, in any case. With the Army of Equestria's initial three month billets ending and half of the Union Army headed back home, the Confederates had attempted to push twice into central Virginia, in an attempt to cut Tempest Wind's Corps off from their depots up at Harpers' Ferry. General Lightning Charm, stationed with her Regulars at Staunton, refused this not only once, but twice within the span of twenty days, fighting off reportedly two separate corps' worth of Confederate Forces with ease, using excellent positioning and fortified locations to hold Staunton and its nearby riverine shipping lane, the James and Kanawha Canal.
No, there was plenty of fight waiting for Flurry and her Division once Moondancer's Corps was ready to march south. Privately it worried Flurry Heart. She'd never fought in a war before, and like Moondancer was quick to remind her, she was barely out of officer school herself. But, she'd been given command of a division, and so command of a division she would take. Her fellow Division commanders, all of whom had actual practical training, were good help and easy to lean on whilst learning - Brigadier General Octavia especially, as she and Flurry bonded over their appreciation of more classical music, such as Bethooven, and Bach.
An aide knocked on the door of the room she'd claimed from the Coltago town hall as her command office, and with a simple reply, she ushered the stallion in. It was one of her company Lieutenants, who provided a quick, crisp salute that she quickly returned. "What have you got for me, Lieutenant?"
"Newspaper for you ma'am, as requested." The Lieutenant replied, hoofing over the paper. The Coltago Tribune was a reliable enough news source, and one Flurry Heart made use of often, at Moondancer's recommendation; it was better for an officer to be as informed as possible, she posited, about as much as possible.
"My thanks, Lieutenant. Anything else of note to report today?"
"Not particularly, General, ma'am. No new injuries from drills or sickness, and nothing sent our way from General Moondancer."
"Very good, thank you. You're dismissed." Flurry would nod politely, returning the Lieutenant's salute before he stepped out of the room.
With a quiet hum, Flurry regarded the newspaper idly, then blinked, doing a double-take and snatching the paper off of her desk with her magic to read it more clearly.
Celestia to Invoke Enrollment Act
"The Equestrian Throne has as of the 15th of this month passed an enrollment - or draft - act, to provide fresh ponypower to the growing Union Army. The Act is the first genuine National Conscription law placed into effect since the War in the Heavens, over one thousand years ago. The law is to require the enrollment of all able-bodied mares and stallions that are Equestrian citizens between the ages of 20 to 45, unless exempted by the act, which provides provisions for factory laborers, farm-owners, and ordained ministers of the gospel, as well as other exemptions laid out in the act itself. The Provost Marshal General's office has been recreated under the leadership of Marshal General Wind Chill to oversee the deployment of the Enrollment act. Continued on Page 4."
Flurry Heart reviewed the headline once, then again, before laying it down with a frown. Aunt Celestia must be terribly worried about the enlistment slump, Flurry supposed, if she was ordering a full-fledged draft. This was likely to cause trouble, but with the Confederates maintaining the same large numbers as before the draft slump... Well, the act might be necessary. The war wasn't likely to end any time soon, Flurry knew, and the battles being fought were consuming soldiers at a wildly larger rate than even the Badlands Campaign had - even though most of the battles currently being fought rated little more than a skirmish or minor battle.
There was trouble brewing if the Union Army couldn't get its numbers back up, of that, Flurry Heart was sure - and honestly scared. |
North and South | Chapter Ten | August 7th, 1861
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The locomotive whistle sounded out amidst the onset of Fall windchill, as the steam engine began to lumber its way out of Coltago proper. Troops from within the train's long carriages waved and cheered out at the citizenry along both sides of the large city's stationhouse, as Moondancer and her cadre sequestered themselves within the officer's carriage.
The engine lurched to life along with its train, as a second whistle joined the first, signaling the engine's departure from its station. The army of the Coltago was on the move finally, with orders passed down from Luna's Command to the Telegraph office early into last evening.
Moondancer's commands were simple; march down through Western Virginia. Find any and all Rebel forces. Fight and kill them. Luna had no compunctions about being direct with her commands - something Moondancer quite appreciated in a commanding officer. The Princess turned Major General was fast to the point, and from all reports, busy keeping the Rebels on the tips of their hooves. It would take a good portion of the month for Moondancer's Corps to make their way far enough south to happen upon any Confederate forces; she'd have to march through Wheeling, and then down towards the Shenandoah Valley - and she was still deciding whether it'd be more feasible to march down the West or East of the Blue Ridge Mountains.
That could wait for now, though. Wheeling first. Then, the front.
=#===#=
Lightning Charm swore heavily and rapidly as she ducked herself down into the ditch on the North side of the Canal - itself a piss-poor excuse for a river, but wide enough to make fording it not a casual endeavor. Rocking herself momentarily from side to side and stress-tapping the Remneighton Model 51 holstered on her side, the aging General's ears flicked back and forth with frustration as the Rebel Artillery dueled with her own. The rebel infantry was still moving forwards towards the canal, as their skirmishers and her own traded rifle fire, and for the second time the General cursed her stupidity in sending Wind's Corps north to protect the flank while they rebuilt their numbers.
With three month enlistments ending a few weeks ago, most of the Army of Equestria had been gutted, outside of her own Corps, Moondancer's new Corps that was supposedly marching down Western Virginia, and the re-enlistees that made up the rest of the AoE. And of course, the Confederates had waited until the entire Army of Equestria was busy re-filling their ranks to make a dedicated attack along the current lines of the war.
In front of her, as her scouts had informed her with some accuracy, was at least two Rebel Corps - Hampton's Division, freshly reformed from their mauling earlier in the year and marching under what was guessed to be in excess of eight thousand ponies - and whatever leftovers were still fighting-capable from the Army of the Fillisee.
So only somewhere between twelve and sixteen thousand rebel troops, no pressure.
"General you should probably pull back a bit!" Barked Colonel Shimmer, as the younger officer stalked her way over to her older superior, standing tall and firm with her black-hats of the so-called Iron Brigade. The entire three-thousand pony brigade, mustered out of her home state of Coltnetticut, was armed with a mixture of majority Whinnyworth rifles, as well as a few Sharps and Maresissippi rifles they'd picked up as casualties filtered in and out of the brigade over the course of their previous battles.
"Hell with that, I just got here!" Charm shouted back in reply, as Shimmer snorted, settling in next to her officer without a care in the world, as if they weren't currently being shot at by a rapidly growing Confederate line. "I figure we've got near fourteen thousand Rebs in front of us, think you can hold the riverline!?" Charm shouted in continuation, as another volley rattled out from the Iron Brigade, and cannon shot splashed into the canal.
"So long as we've got shot and powder, we'll hold all the damned live-long day, General!" Sunset replied, after a moment's consideration. "They're coming harder against our right flank, where Skipper and Night are at, they're more at risk than my position is, ma'am!"
"Noted! I want you to listen for my bugle calls! If you hear a short, three note burst - like a Tah-Tah-Tah!- you are to refuse the line, understand!? You are to shorten the line shifting to your right, as Light collapses in on your left, and we pull back from the river to force them to cross after us!"
"I understand ma'am! Three notes, we refuse the line!"
"Good mare! Now kill me some rebels!"
=#===#=
As the day wore on, rifle shot after rifle shot was expended with haste, as the rebels attempted several times to cross Charm's line at the river. All times attempted, the confederates were driven off under withering fire, but with ammunition beginning to run low and nighttime beginning to fall, Charm's troops, as skilled and professional as they were, were beginning to flag.
Skipper on the right snapped first, as his troops ran low - then completely out - of ammunition, though he still carried an orderly and slow withdrawal covered by Wood's two artillery batteries, sending off a runner to Charm before doing anything. As a result, the bugle call was sounded, and the line was refused, as Charm's entire corps shifted to meet the rebels attempting to push their flank. Night Light's Brigade was rushed from the left, instead of collapsing into Sunset's flank, and sent to the far right at the triple-time, and hurriedly patched up the hole left by Skipper's retreating brigade just in time to repulse a concerted rebel push across the river.
By nightfall however, the rebels had crossed the Canal on the flank, despite Charms' refusal of the line, and so she had to plan accordingly. Ammunition was brought up overnight, and troops were shifted under cover of darkness - as the rebels who had yet to quit the field no doubt did the same - to better protect the now endangered artillery batteries.
When morning came the rebels, who as Charm had expected stacked a majority of their remaining troops along the Union's right, were surprised. They'd been expecting something to be done of course to cover Skipper's retreat, and Charm wasn't stupid enough to believe they hadn't expected that, but they also likely hadn't expected Juniper Wood to roll both his batteries of thirty pounders up to the main infantry line. Wood had ordered his two battery commanders to pack doubled up canister loads, and as the rebels crested the canal-line, coming face to face with a line of not only fresh infantry in the form of Sunset's redeployed and re-supplied Iron Brigade, but also heavy artillery at close range.
The resultant canister barrages tore through the rebels attempting to push out from the canal-line, and Sunset's own Brigade stood their ground with their high quality rifles, keeping the rebels from simply charging out to kill or capture the cannons; it was a slaughter, despite the vastly larger rebel numbers, and before midday, the rebels were falling back in disrepair, leaving hundreds of prisoners and wounded, mangled bodies scattered around the canal. It'd been one of Charm's costlier wins, as her casualty reports were nearing closer to a thousand - a full seventh of her corps - but in the face of such overwhelming enemy odds, she'd take what she could get. Hopefully Wind or Heart would move in her direction soon, or there'd be trouble if the confederates came again.
But for today, the Regulars held their ground, and by Faust was anyone else going to move them from it. |
North and South | Not a Chapter - Quick Update | Hey guys, I didn't want to make this a blog post because I know not all my readers check the blog.
THIS STORY IS NOT DEAD.
It has been on a temporary hiatus that should end sometime this week, however, due to a glaring issue with my story writing - Grand Tactician released a large update (Whiskey and Lemons) that uh, kind of broke my game save.
So between college, work, and my free time, I've tried fixing the game save, including rolling back to an old version of the game, but it's just not happening.
So instead, I've been taking notes across some other Campaigns I've started on the new version of the game, and the rest of North and South will follow similarly (but not exactly) to that model.
The show will go on, folks, all this means is that I'll not be keeping up with the blogs anymore, which is saddening, but them's the breaks.
Expect a new chapter out sometime this week, and I'll be continuing forwards alongside my written outline going forwards.
Thank you for your patience,
Tempest |
North and South | Chapter Eleven | August 28th and 29th, 1861
=#===#=
Staunton was once more under siege from a numerically superior Rebel Force, as Generals Charm and Wind wearily looked over their war-map of the region, as well as the attached cavalry scouting reports that Spring Rain had submitted. Outnumbered over two to one, with a combined force of fourteen thousand against a large rebel combined force of forty-one or so thousand, the Royal Army's Right flank was not looking particularly stable or tenable.
And yet,
"If we can hold on for at least the day, there's supposedly reinforcement marching from up North, from towards Coltago." Charm began quietly, folding away her spectacles to give her weary eyes a rest, as the tent's lamp began to burn low in the misty pre-dawn. The aging general gave her forehead a rub with a Hoof, trying to will the headache away.
"That's a big if," Wind began, equally worn down, as she rolled a cigar idly between her teeth. "Do we know how far to the North, other than, 'sometime tomorrow', at all?"
"No." Charm began, shaking her head. "Just guesswork. At best, if they force a March and there's a train waiting for them at Grafton or Wheeling, and then the line's totally clear, they could be here late this evening. At worst, it could be a couple days. By which point, of course, we'll have been swept up from Staunton and probably back over the Potomac."
"Mhn. Well," Wind drawled, deigning to light her cigar with a match. "We can probably hold for the day, at least. It'll take Johnny Reb a few hours to bring their Brigades on-line I figure, and March up the canal."
"True." Charm nodded, snout creasing slightly at the cigar smoke, but otherwise not commenting on her fellow general's habits. "Then they'll have to actually cross the canal under fire. We've got Crescent Moon's Corps in front of us based on the flags, he'll want to take time to draw up his whole Corps before he decides to come and push us off the canal."
"All respect Gen'ral;" Wind retorted softly, her Fillyseean twang giving a thick weight to her words, "he won't need his whole Corps. He figures that out, he'll just send whatever half shows up first and make us move, like at the cadet school last week."
"You're not wrong, Wind." Charm nodded, after giving the warning fair consideration. "But I think we can use that, too. If Moon just throws whatever he feels like at us instead of forming on-line, well, we should be able to hold them off so long as the ammo is good. And Moon's particularly slow to put all his folks on-line."
"Beats runnin' back up to th' Ferry with our tails tucked." The younger general groused, puffing away on her cigar gamely. "We'll hold the day, and figure it out from there?"
Lightning nodded, tapping a hoof idly against the map as she replaced her spectacles. "We'll hold for the day, and figure out our situation from there."
=#===#=
As was quickly becoming traditional, cannonade opened up the temo of the latest battle for Staunton. Rebel cannons - a hodgepodge of Parrot Guns, Ordnance Rifles, and older Neighpoleon Guns - rang out from hilltops opposing the canal, over at the Rutledge Hills. The Southern guns blared, as Cheerilee's two twelve pounder field gun batteries and Wood's two thirty pounder Parrots responded in kind, sending shells roaring across the canal, whilst infantry on both sides laid low in place, trying not to be intersected by wayward shells or shrapnel.
The first Confederate Brigades began probing the Royalist line as the artillery began to peter out, about twenty minutes after their beginning - likely due to munitions concerns. The infantry marched directly up to the canal - at which point the Royalists stood and began peppering the advancing Rebels with their mixture of Whinnyworthe, Maresissippis, and Sharps rifles from the regulars, and Steedfield rifles from Tempest's finally reasonably armed veteran militia.
The Confederates stood firm in the face of the Royal troops' firepower and started returning rifle fire themselves, as minie balls began to fly back and forth like angry hornets, smoke clouds expelling out of the ends of rifles and filling the sky with the acrid smell of black powder and the coppery scent of fresh blood, as musket balls found targets and bodies began to drop.
The rebel infantry began their first withdrawal a few minutes later, not broken but clearly uninterested in sitting around and taking obscene levels of casualties as the Royalists used their hastily dug barricades to good effect of cover.
=//[]\\=
Major Cloud Jet, standing next to Colonel Shimmer of the Regular Corps, mopped a hoofkerchief across her brow, already feeling the heat of the exceedingly warm Virginia day.
"Think they'll come again soon?" She questioned, gazing over to her regularly uniformed counterpart, who shrugged and lit up a small, wooden tobacco pipe.
"Don't rightly figure they'll just leave." Sunset hummed, after a moment's consideration. "We've probably just gotten their dander up now. They'll be back in short order, question's really whether or not they've got friends yet or if they're still forming lines."
"Well, whatever they decide to do, We've got the ammunition for it." Major Jet hummed, nodding down their line as small boxes of paper cartridges were doled out to the resting troops.
"For now, sure." Sunset nodded. "But I'd still be sparing as you can. Fifty odd cartridges plus whatever reserve we can scrounge up isn't going to last all day."
"No. They won't." Cloud agreed, rubbing her hoofkerchief across her face once more.
Damned heat.
=//[]\\=
The rebels came back about an hour or so later, with another fresh Division of troops in the vanguard, followed by whatever division had initially skirmished at the canal. Colonel Starry Night's section of the line was being pushed upon next, as her Sharps Rifles let out a withering rate of fire at the advancing Rebels. For their part, the Rebels made it up to the creek, and then made use of a shallow divot on their end of the canal - probably a wagon or cart track with a squat stone guiding fence - to crouch and lay prone, as they slowly but more safely returned fire.
Starry swore beneath her breath and waved over her runner, who dipped and ducked their way across the firing line and over to the Colonel's position. "Colonel Night, ma'am!" He reported, sliding down next to the unicorn mare.
"Corporal!" Starry began with a bark, as rifle shots whizzed overhead of the two. "Send my compliments back to General Charm! Advise, I need the artillery Guns to dislodge these entrenched Rebels to my front, along that wagon track dip on the South Bank!"
"Understood, ma'am! Compliments to the General, need the guns to dislodge our forward rebels!" The corporal repeated with a nod.
"Good stallion. Go." And with a snappy salute, he was off, headed back behind the line and towards Charm's Command line.
=[<I>]=
Fireball Blast's thirty pounder guns hissed hot steam from their menacing black maps, shortly before a worm was rammed down the barrel and tugged free, yanking blazing embers along with it. A wet sponge followed the worm, leaving the massive parrot gun hissing again but properly doused and ready to load.
Major Blast watched her crews with a practiced eye, as one of Spring Rain's cavalry fliers flittered over, the Sergeant snapping off a quick salute to the unicorn major. "General Charm's compliments, Major! General wants your guns adjusted to fire south of the canal and into the wagon track in front of Colonel Night's position, if practical!"
Blast returned the salute, waiting until after the second battery's guns sounded out a roll of round shot at the rebel infantry to give her reply. "I'll see what I can make happen, Sergeant. Advise General Charm it won't be easy shooting, I won't know its efficacy until I have shells flying."
"I shall advise the General. At your leave, Major?"
"As you were Sergeant." Fireball nodded, sharply returning his salute before turning to address her gun crews.
"All guns, all guns!" She barked, drawing their attention as she began to speak to the colts and fillies running her large bore guns. "Adjust ranging out to..." She trailed off with a pause, gazing out at the field through a pair of field glasses. "Adjust ranging, eight hundred and twenty yards! Give me a ranging shot of round with fuse at... let's start with seventeen seconds if you would!"
=//[]\\=
Starry swore again, as the first shot from whatever red-leg's batter was assigned to her line landed far ahead of the rebels to her front, sailing off over their low-slung heads as the two infantry formations continued to trade rifle fire. The second shot, a couple moments later, landed perilously short - actually splashing into the canal, and sending filthy water all over the damned place.
Her troops kept up their rifle fire regardless, albeit at a slightly slower rate than their Sharps rifles could manage so as to conserve their munitions as the rebels - still dug in for the time being on their divot - shot back in return. The unicorn officer grimaced as a third shell - hopefully just ranging shots - smashed directly through her ramparts - and really hopefully not causing a glut of casualties - and shook her head disparagingly. "If I survive this shit I'm going back to my farm and staying there."
A few moments later though, Starry considered eating her words - and her hat - as a fourth shot finally - and wonderfully - smashed directly through the low stone fence covering the divot, careening into the confederate forces that had been taking cover behind it.
"Oh. Shit."
=//[]\\=
"There, there's my fucking fuse length." Fireball hissed, beneath her breath as she exhaled a breath she hadn't known she was holding. Dropping her field glasses to hang around her neck, she spun and gave snappy orders to her gun crews. "Give me a full spread of case, keep that twelve second timer and maintain elevation and ranging! We've got the bastards now!" The Major belted out, taking a moment to drink a swig of water from her canteen.
"Fire until I can't see the bastards anymore!"
=//[]\\=
"Damn, look at that over there." Sunset whistled, having freshly lit her pipe again with more tobacco, and gesturing for Major Jet to follow her pointed hoof. The two had moved over to the center of their position to discuss ammunition concerns when Blast's battery finally found it's mark, and began to liberally spray the wagon divot with the molten steel of angry case shot as the munitions shrapnelled outwards and into the currently prone and easily targeted rebels.
The Colonel and the Major watched as the Rebels decided not to subject themselves to the withering barrage for much longer, and stood up, quitting the field and retreating from the divot.
After watching the retreat for a moment as the Unicorn of the pair puffed away on her pipe, Cloud Jet retrieved her pocket watch, checking the time in reference to the slowly setting sun. "Mm. 'bout four in the afternoon. They could bring up another attack if they wanted, they've still got a couple hours before dusk."
"Don't think they will, Major?" Shimmer prodded idly, giving the pegasus mare a side eye as she watched the rebels withdraw under withering fire from Starry's rifles and Blast's cannonades.
"They could, but honestly? I think they'll just mass up for a big attack first thing in the morning. We kicked their teeth in today, and they'll be sore about that until first light I reckon."
"Unfortunately Major," Sunset frowned from around her pipe, watching intently as the last few rebels left the field, "I feel that you are correct."
===#===
Flurry Heart blinked repeatedly as she crunched her teeth on a few unground coffee beans, whilst her division marched along ahead of her. She herself was surrounded by her staff officers, who all looked equally exhausted as she felt, and likely were. It was getting late in the evening - near to nine at night - but the Army of Coltago showed no signs of stopping. Moondancer's orders had been clear to all her divisional commanders: The Royal right flank was being threatened by a comparatively large rebel army, and the Army of the Coltago's first field duty would be to relieve the flank.
The troops were weary, and fall-outs were definitely happening. Thankfully, her hospital wagons were following close behind, as the army kept up its blistering pace despite grumbling and exhaustion from the troops. If the right flank collapsed at Staunton, the entire Shenandoah River Valley would be opened up to rebel maneuver, and Luna's Army of Equestria could then be dislodged.
So on into the night Flurry Heart and her division marched. They were slated to stop marching at around three in the morning, take a few hours' rest on the roadside - no time for camps or bivouac - and then they'd be on the march again at seven, so that Staunton could hopefully be relieved by at least midday.
Hopefully they could hold on for that long.
=#===#=
"Can't sleep?"
Twilight Sparkle shook her head, staring out at the railway line leading southwards out of Alexandria. There was a whole Confederate Corps down there, somewhere, keeping her and Trixie's troops from moving off to reinforce Charm's crumbling flank.
The young princess gave an exhausted gaze over at Luna, as the elder alicorn sat down next to the younger. "Nor can you, apparently." Twilight nodded, offering a cup of long cold coffee to the Princess of the night. Luna shook her head in negative, leaving Twilight to retain her cup. She took a shallow sip of the bitter brew.
"Nay, we are a nocturnal sort on the regular, though this war has already begun changing such habits. Which is... more the pity, we believe."
"Mnh."
"Thou- You are troubled, Twilight."
It wasn't a question.
"More than I should be, probably. I wasn't expecting the rebels to hit our right with such a large force, considering what we have in front of us, out there somewhere."
"Mnh." Luna nodded, solemnly. "It's a valid fear though, Twilight. Behind us lay our homes. Our ponies. Our families. We must stand and defend them, even if it costs us deeply to do so. But we can only do our best."
"And if our best isn't enough, Luna? What then? What do we do after that?"
"Then we do what we can, Twilight. And we keep doing what we can, until we cannot." Luna sighed, wearily removing her campaign hat to run a hoof across her face. Her light blue mane fluttered in its invisible and ethereal breeze, as she rested the campaign hat down in her lap.
"But how? How are you so... so calm? I'm- I'll be honest with you I'm not sleeping because I'm afraid, I-"
"We know, Twilight Sparkle. Luna raised her hoof to halt the stressed lavender alicorn. "We are the Princess of the Night - as well as of Dreams. We are... doing what we can to soothe such aspects of our subjects' nights. It is an uphill battle these days, I am afraid. You do not have to explain yourself to me, my friend."
"I... I'm sorry, Luna. I don't know what just came over me, I-"
"Be not sorry, Twilight my dear friend. We all do what we can do. No more, and no less. For some, that is different than for their peers. You have done things for me and my sister that I could never hope to match. Let me comfort you in turn. You have nothing to apologize to me for."
"...Thank you."
"Anytime." Luna nodded, following Twilight's gaze out past the railroad tracks headed South. She kept her campaign hat in her lap, clearly intending not to move herself for some time either. "You should rest, Twilight. The war will still be on when the Sun touches the sky."
=//[]\\=
The morning dew brought with it massed rifle fire, as Rebel infantry closed the distance once more to the Royal line. Sunset's Walker revolver cracked angrily, levitated aloft in her magic as the massed confederate forces moved across the divot, across the canal, and directly up to the ramparts that she and her brigade were still currently holding with a firm grasp.
Bullets flew to and fro on her left and right as Royal and Rebel alike fell - dead or wounded - aside and in front of her. Her hoofgun barked once, twice, thrice in as many seconds, as she emptied the rest of her six cylinders into the rebels to her front before ducking back below the ramparts her troops were using to protect themselves. To her side, Major Jet's brigade - really by an extension the entire Royal line of battle - was in similar straits, as the massed rebel force battered away at them with reckless abandon and sheer weight of numbers.
Breaking open her revolver's cylinder to reload, Sunset took a calming breath that did little to actually calm her jittery hooves, and began the lengthy process of actually reloading her cap and ball revolver, whilst her troops kept up their steady rate of fire despite increasing casualties.
Clamping her revolver closed once more after several agonizingly long seconds, Sunset rose back up to her hooves alongside her troops and began dumping her freshly loaded bullets downrange once more at the slowly advancing rebels. Despite the withering fire being put out by the Royalist infantry with their impressive Whinnyworth and Sharps rifles, they were still being dogpiled upon by the confederate forces, and the line was beginning to strain.
It was only a matter of time before that strain turned into a snap.
=//[]\\=
Starry Night hissed as a rifle bullet nicked her shoulder, jabbing a hoof down to the graze and coming back bloody. She'd attend to that during a lull, but right now, as she had her saber wedged in the dirt and a Sharps rifle cradled in her hooves, she had more pressing and immediate concerns.
The rebels had brought the entirety of their force on-line finally, which spelled bad times ahead in the immediate term for the Royalists, as ammunition was expended and casualties were beginning to mount. So far they were holding their positions, but her Sharps rifles were quickly proving to be a bit of a double edged sword; they were fast-firing rifles and accurate ones to boot which, while her troops were maintaining good speed and good accuracy, also meant they were rapidly running out of ammunition - and it was still only about ten in the morning.
Starry Night mopped the sweat off her brow with a hoof, as the Rebels finally called off their assault with a pair of choppy bugle calls to re-organize themselves back into something assembling cohesion. She then took a scrap of loose fabric out of a pocket to tie around her grazed shoulder, tying it off with a stick as it began to soak red with blood, though not at a rate which would be cause for concern.
The Unicorn sat down against the shooting parapet, looking around at her worn brigade. "Okay... Okay. Post sentries for when they decide to sally at us again. Everypony else, gather rifles and ammo, and get the wounded back down to the surgeons' tents. Take a few minutes and get some rest. They'll be here again shortly, folks."
Faust, was she tired all of a sudden.
Concerned suddenly, Starry double-checked herself for injuries and winced as she placed a hoof to her upper thigh, scowling as it came back slick with red blood.
"And someone help me with a Faust-damned bandage, I appear to have been shot."
=#===#=
General Charm rubbed a forehoof across her muzzle in frustration, before nodding over at the newly present Corporal. "Report."
"We've held off another assault ma'am, but it's not looking to be doable for much longer. Colonel Night's reporting she's been injured, but the surgeon gave her a look-over and declared her fit to return to her troops. Colonel Shimmer additionally reports that the right flank is drastically low on shot, and Starry herself reported about three shots left to a soldier, more or less."
"Suppose it's time to prepare the withdrawal then." Tempest sighed wearily, and clearly unhappy with the idea. General Charm didn't call the Filliseean on the grousing - she was feeling much the same way after all.
Rifle fire in the distance shook the two out of their despairing thoughts however, as Lightning Charm frowned, folding away her spectacles. "Already? Dammit they'll force a rout at this point if they keep pushing us like this."
"Bit far off for our folks." Tempest noted with a hum, giving Charm a pause, before continuing, her ears twitching to the sounds of rifle fire. "Sounds like that's off over the hill."
"Over the hill?"
"Hm? Oh, yes'm. Sounds like it's off on the far side of Rutledge Hills, not the canal."
"Wind, that's fairly deep into the Rebel Flank."
"Well yes, I am aware, General Charm. That was sort of my point, actually."
"So I am corrected." Charm nodded neutrally, as the two officers followed by the reporting Corporal left the tent to try and observe the new skirmish.
Smoke and shot-cloud flew, rising from the rear of the Rutledge Hills, as the two mares shared a confused look. Moondancer's Army was still supposedly a fair way out at the last report given around six in the morning.
"Just what in the hell is going on over there?"
===#===
Flurry Heart swore beneath her breath, gasping for air as fire - hot fire - shot through her lungs, bullets crashing off and finally shattering her pale pink shield and knocking the youthful Division Officer off her hooves.
This would turn out to save her life in the short term, as heated shrapnel soared overhead, spearing several troops of her division as the alicorn watched with a slack jaw from her position on the hard ground. Things had started out well enough, as her troops - recently rested from their excruciating overnight march - finally reached the Staunton battlefield ahead of schedule, and were ready to help the Royal defenders give a whipping to the rest of the Rebel Army.
Of course, about that time Flurry's Division finished cresting Rutledge Hill, and the young Alicorn came face to face with the Confederate Artillery Train - currently sighted down and towards the canal. With a fast quarter turn of their guns as her own troops continued forwards into the maw of the rebel cannons, Fluffy froze in the face of such massed guns, and only lived as her Division's front rank was shredded by doubled loads of canister due to a Confederate Brigade being held in reserve knocking her over onto the ground by breaking her shield with gunfire.
Rolling back onto her hooves, having shaken herself free of her momentary stupor, Flurry nearly barked at her bugler to call for a retreat, and get themselves the hell out of this killing field. She bit her tongue though, seeing the pennant battle-flags of General Melody's Division waving at the base of the hill, and instead called out to her troops. "Hell with it, return fire at those damned cannons!" She cried, snapping up her service pistol into her magic's grasp and beginning to return fire at the Confederates that had ambushed them. Her position wasn't great, but if she could just keep her troops together for long enough that Melody's division could reinforce her - and if Melody was here then Snow was shortly behind her and Redglad would be just behind Snow, with the gun train.
They might have a chance here.
Flurry Heart grit her teeth and dug in her hooves where she was, letting her shield flare back to life weakly as her troops gave out jaunts and jeers at the rebels to their front, rifles clattering out their shots like an angrily rattlling drum. The alicorn mare dug herself in like a stubborn tick and refused to move herself or her Command, even as the Rebel infantry around the hill began to shift in reaction, even as Melody's Division swept up and around Rutledge Hill and onto her flank, even as Snow came up on her other side and then parallel to Flurry's Division, and the Confederates were shoved, forcibly, down the hill - leaving their cannon train behind them.
Then, Flurry finally let herself sink back to the ground, let her battered shield flicker and die, let her weary eyes close but for a moment, blinking and shaking herself as she felt hooves reaching for her.
"Shit 'm up. I'm okay." Flurry mumbled, as she shook herself back to wakefulness, leg flinching in pain as she stepped wrongly upon it. "I'm okay."
"Just checkin', General. You took a quick dive there." One of her Colonels nodded, dusting her off. "Further orders for us, ma'am?"
"Let me up, let me see what's going on." Flurry began, as her Colonels pointed her in the direction where Melody's Division and Snow's Division were continuing up and over the hill and into the Confederate rear-line.
"Okay." Flurry nodded, then looked out at her wounded division. Her troops still had their wits about them from the looks of things, but they were disorganized, and looked a bit lost. All fixable issues. "Okay. Get the ponies rallied and back on-line, we'll wedge in behind General Melody's Division and act as her reserve. Make sure we're formed up and cohesive before you move out. Understood?" Met by nods, she gave her own sharp nod. "Go."
=#===#=
"Well, the timing was all messed up, and General Heart's lucky she only ran face first into Johnny Reb's cannons rather than their rifle lines, but I suppose it's worked out for the best." Moondancer snorted, spitting a wad of chewing tobacco onto the ground outside Charm and Wind's command tent. She and her Command Staff had made their way along the backside of Staunton to re-group with Charm and Wind's beleaguered staff, as her army marched up the Rebel Flank and began splitting the Confederate Army in twine.
"Can't fault her for taking the fight to the enemy." Charm began, chuckling dryly.
"Sure I can, ma'am. I gave her strict orders not to out-run the rest of the column, and if Melody's Division hadn't double-time marched to keep up, she'd have been fighting half the damned rebel army by herself. She's a damned nuisance." Moondancer snorted, derisively. "But she has turned the Rebel Flank, and I will thus forgive her initiative as it's turned out for the better. She'll have to learn, and learn fast, that there's time to be creative in interpreting orders, and times when she shouldn't. She got lucky today, she made it work. But you can't count on luck to win a fight, and most definitely not a damned war."
Wind shrugged, as she continued to accept casualty tallies from the three generals' division and brigade officers. "Luck's nice. Luck helps. But you're right, it ain't everything." She hums idly, scribbling away at a small pad of paper. "But I'll definitely take a Lucky officer over an un-lucky one."
"Hear hear." Charm chuckled dryly, before shaking her head. "How are the casualties looking, General Wind?"
"Rough, General Charm. No two ways about that. It's still preliminary, but I'm wagerin' about a thousand on our end just dead outright. Probably four times that in wounded. Bout three hundred or more missing or deserted."
"Nnh. And the Rebels?"
"Dunno. Eight thousand easy, and still counting. Took their whole artillery train, too, thanks to that Brigadier of Moondancer's." Tempest would grin, nodding in the scowling unicorn's direction. "Largest damned battle of this war so far, and we came out on top - just about."
"Small mercies, General." Charm nodded, polishing her glasses once more. "Small mercies, and hard fighting." |
Twilight Sparkle, Librarian | pre | Now onto the next order of business. Your next assignment will be much harder than this one, but we are sure that you'll be able to complete this one as well. You will need to travel to a forest just on the outskirts of Manehatten, once there; you will find an old shack. For the first part, all you need to do is enter and let your magic flow into the house. After that, you will need to consult the book, look for an entry dealing with something called "The Record of All Things" and follow what it has to say and retrieve it.
As with the previous assignment, once you have successfully retrieved the record, a new message will be sent, detailing further assignments and compensation.
Now, get going post haste. You need to find the record before those who guard it do and stop you. ~A
"Great, another book that Trixie must acquire..." She grumbled as she picked herself up and began her run towards Manehatten. ~~~
As the sun began to set again, Trixie slowly approached the old building described to her in the letter. It had taken her all through the night and the day to get here; she hoped that whatever was going to happen wouldn't need her to do any more running.
She slowly opened the door with the key that had come with the letter and let her magic light the interior. She gasped at what she saw inside, every surface was covered with intricate designs of magical symbols and lettering. While she hadn't spent too much time on classical magic, she did recognize some of the symbols.
"Long distance teleportation magic," Trixie said softly in awe of the magic of the building. She let her magic expand from herself and out into the building. The designs began to glow softly as the magic slowly flowed into them. Suddenly, Trixie felt a pull at her horn as magic began to pour from her, causing the symbols to glow ever brighter. Then, with a blinding flash of light, she felt herself pulled violently from where she was.
As the light faded, Trixie rubbed at her eyes and horn to ease the pain of her sudden exertion. Taking a look around, she found herself to be in some kind of terminal, similar to something she'd seen before in the larger towns of Manehatten and Fillydelphia with their transit systems, only instead of trolleys and trains, there were rooms set with teleportation circles.
The circle she was standing on was enormous, easily big enough to accommodation dozens of ponies. Layer after layer of runic text rippled out from where she stood in the center like ripples in a pond. The runes themselves were etched into granite the floor and inlaid with silver. This system had been built to last, and no expenses had been spared. Trixie just stood there in stunned silence as she imagined the immense ley-crystals that must be buried underneath each pad, acting both as ethereal anchors and a target for the teleportation matrix above. And that was just one node of the entire system.
Th-this is incredible, Trixie thought to herself. I've never seen anything like this before. No, I've never even heard of anything like this. It's like something fit for the princesses, but then why is it here? Somepony else must have built this place. And whoever I'm working for must be related to them somehow.
Trixie shook her head, effectively clearing her thoughts. "When this is over I'm demanding a raise. Whoever this 'A' character is, I'm sure he can afford it."
"Aha, here it is," she said as she found an entry on it. "Hum... blah blah history, blah blah danger, oh! Untold powers... hum, here we are, location. The kingdom of Gilded Trees far to the northwest beyond the frozen northern wastes." Trixie wandered through the terminal, looking at the signs for the rooms, each one had the name of a city or a region, though as she walked, the signs began to show fewer words and more pictures and began to show the effects of many years. Soon, she came across one that appeared to be blank. She let more magic flow into her horn to give her more light to see by, and there, faintly visible, was a pair of crossed golden trees over a golden crown.
"Gilded trees indeed." Trixie entered the room and with a similar process to before, gave her magic to the magical symbols before vanishing in a flash of blinding light.
"And there we go," Golden said as she passed Twilight the, now slightly better looking, teleportation node. "Good as new. Well, as new as I can make it without a good set of tools anyways."
"So what do I do with it?" Twilight asked.
"Just power it up. Ya know, use your fancy magic on it and all that stuff."
"Just that... wait, if it's powered by magic, how do earth ponies and pegasi use them?"
"No need ta think on that." Golden waved a hoof in the air, dismissing the question for the time being. "We have our ways. Now, go on and charge it up."
Twilight focused her magic on the wood and soon felt it begin to radiate with magic as the symbols glowed softly.
"Just like that, Twi," Golden said. "There that looks 'bout ready to use. Now, what this thing'll do is it'll teleport you to the central hub for the order's transport. Once there, ya just gotta find the right portal. Each one should have a sign that says where it's going."
"Aren't you coming with me?"
"'Fraid not. Got my own mission to handle and all that. Hope ya come out of this thing alive."
"But--" As Twilight began to protest, she felt a forceful pull on her horn as the glow turned blinding. She felt herself soaring through the air for a moment before coming to a stop and falling onto her face as her legs found ground again.
"Ouch..." she said as she regained her footing before the sight of where she was left her speechless. She stared at the central hub of the Hidden Stories' teleportation hub with the look of a filly finding that she had gained her cutie mark. The place was filled with history; it was in the architecture, in the lighting, in the very air itself. She could have spent days searching for the secrets of this one place alone. But then, a flash of light from her saddlebag reminded her of her duty. She brought free her journal and gazed at the most recent passage.
Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Just look at this place! Look at architecture, that has got to be pre-pony kingdoms workmanship. Oh I could just spend days on end here trying to find out the secrets of this place. But that's for another time. I have a mission, a very important mission. The Record is long off, and whoever's after it has a giant lead on me. Golden said this place is the central transport hub, so the further I go, the older the spells should be. The one I'm looking is one of the oldest, set behind a sign with the faded crest of the fallen kingdom.
"Thank you again journal." Twilight nodded her head and sped off past the multitude of rooms, noting the destinations of some. It seemed to her that there was one here for each and every city and major location in Equestria as well as many that she did not know. She soon found the room she was looking for: a sign with a faded representation of a pair of golden trees over a golden crown, just as her journal had said.
She remembered how she had powered the portal teleport node, and sent her magic into the symbols of the room. "Here goes nothing," she said as she found herself pulled once more into a blinding light. |
Twilight Sparkle, Librarian | The Record of All Things - Part 4 | Twilight Sparkle: Librarian
The Record of All Things - Part 5
By: Raryn
As the light of the teleportation spell faded, Trixie found herself in the dark. There was a faint sound of water dripping from somewhere and the smell of mildew filled the air. She sent magic into her horn, and it began to glow, illuminating where she was with a soft light. It was a cave, and not a natural one by the looks of it. The walls and floor were clean cut, flat and even, and lead away down a hallway that faded into darkness. The layer of dust that surrounded the teleportation matrix showed that no pony had been here in a long time.
Gazing around, she hesitantly stepped from the matrix pedestal onto the floor. Nothing happened. Trixie breathed a small sigh of relief and slowly began to make her way down the hallway, gazing all over for any signs of traps or other markers that may have been left by whoever created this cave.
"This was just like something out of one of those crazy adventure novels," she thought aloud. "An intrepid adventurer traversing the old and dangerous places of the world."
Soon, she reached a door as the hallway ended. It was a wooden door, reinforced with thick iron bands, marred with age. It had a large metal handle and a heavy wooden crossbar keeping it shut. Trixie reached out with her magic and lifted the crossbar from its holding place before pulling the door open. Light flooded into the cave, blinding Trixie as her eyes slowly adjusted.
When she could see again, her eyes went wide and her mouth hung open. Before her, down in a valley, stood the remains of several large stone buildings, some many times larger than even the royal palace in Canterlot. Trixie floated out the book and flipped it back to the entry on her task.
Wow, I know I was expecting ruins of a sort when I did all the research, but I wasn't expecting this. I guess this is the proof of the greatness of the age before the time of the three races. The tall monolithic ruins stark against the green of the surrounding hills and not a single soul in sight--
"Blah blah blah, that's not what I need to know. I need to know where the Record is being kept." Trixie skipped through the book, looking for something, anything that'd tell her what she wanted.
From all the research I've done, I'm almost certain that the Record is deep within a tomb within a vault within the largest of the buildings, the ruins of the imperial palace of the kingdom.
"That's what I wanted." Trixie replaced the book back into her bag before she made her way towards the ruins of the lost kingdom.
As the light of the teleportation spell faded, Twilight found herself in the dark. There was a faint sound of water dripping from somewhere and the smell of mildew filled the air. She sent magic into her horn, and it began to glow, illuminating where she was with a soft light. It was a cave, and not a natural one by the looks of it. The walls and floor were clean cut, flat and even, and lead away down a hallway that faded into darkness. The hoofprints that stood out against the thick layer of dust proved her journal's words that there was somepony out there who was going for the Record. She was certain that it was the same pony who had stolen Bookworm's journal. The tracks looked to be less than a day old, so Twilight quickly sped down the hallway to find a doorway with its door standing ajar.
As she exited, her eyes grew wide and her mouth dropped open. Before her was the ruins of the ancient civilization that had created the Record; the precursor to pony culture, and in her eyes, they were magnificent. The way the buildings were made, what they might contain, all of it could help to shed light on just how ancient ponies had lived, and possibly on what could have happened to cause them to vanish from the annals of history.
"No! No, gotta stay on task." Twilight shook her head, banishing the temptation to explore for the sake of history. That could all be done later, once she'd secured the safety of the Record. And yet, she had no idea on where to begin her search for it. All she knew was that it was in a tomb somewhere at the end of the known lands of the time; where that could be, she had no clue.
"End of land... end of land... maybe there's something on it in one of the buildings." Twilight gazed over the ruins and decided that the best bet was the large one in the center. Large buildings always were the most important. She slowly made her way down towards the ruins and as she approached her destination, an arrow embedded itself in front of her, still quivering from the force of the hit, and a voice echoed around her.
"Bídsteall! Hwa geonre?"
Trixie approached the ruined palace slowly, keeping to the shadows. She knew better than to assume that the place was abandoned and not inhabited. She'd read the books, these places were never abandoned. Her caution won in the end; as she peaked around a corner, she spied a pair of ponies standing a little ways from where she was, right in her path. They were speaking to each other, but in a tongue that Trixie couldn't understand. Thinking fast, she levitated a small rock and tossed it down a side path that was near the two. The noise attracted their attention and they moved off towards the sound.
Trixie took advantage of the small distraction she had created and moved quickly down the path. She didn't meet any other ponies after the first two and soon she found herself at the base of the palace ruins.
"Ok Trixie," she said to herself. "You can do this. This'll be easy. You have a book that probably can tell you exactly how to find what we're looking for and how not to get caught by anything." She moved towards an entrance and peeked in. It was empty and she quickly ducked in. She removed the book from her bag again and flipped through it.
Upon entering the ruined city, I found that it was far from abandoned and empty. It wasn't much, but there were small signs of inhabitance; a fresh hoof print here, the remains of a small fire there. Then, turning a corner, I came face to face with a pony in clothes that let him blend in with the surroundings. He spoke in the ancient tongue and--
"Ok, I get it. Place isn't abandoned," Trixie said as she flipped past the section. "What is with this thing and detailing such unimportant things? Ah, here we go; the entrance to wherever this Record is being kept."
After the savage beast that had been ravaging the nearby grassland had been captured and secured, I returned to the local encampment to the cheers of all there. And for upholding my end of the bargain, and swearing an oath to protect it, History agreed to inform me of the location to the Record's resting place and the keys to the several locks and seals guarding it. They are as follows...
Trixie marked the page with the spells and started on her journey through the ruins of the palace to the vault and its hidden secrets.
Twilight jumped back in surprise with a small shriek as the arrow struck the ground in front of her and the voice sounded out. "Who's there? I don't mean any harm here, in fact I mean--"
"Swíge! Ingehygdnessa," the voice sounded again. While she didn't know exactly what was being said, she did recognize the ancient Equestrian language. "Um, I'm sorry, but I don't understand what you are saying."
At that, an earth pony stallion wearing clothes of the same color as the ruins appeared from a small niche in the stone and slowly approached, brandishing a wooden spear with a stone head. "Who you? Why here?" he spoke in broken modern Equestrian.
"One moment, I think I can make this easier for us." Twilight sent magic through her horn, and as it began to glow, startled cries came from ruins.
"Þyrs!"
"Helrýnegu!"
"Galdricge!"
"Miscenning!" The stallion standing before Twilight shouted back at the voices. "Scinnlæce." The voices quieted down at that and Twilight let her magic flow out over her.
"There we go. That should do the trick," she said.
"What did you do, Sorceress?" the stallion asked. "You are speaking in our tongue."
"Just a simple translation spell. It allows for me to understand what you are saying and for what I am saying to be understood. What were they saying while I was casting the spell?"
"They called you a demon, witch, and enchantress. But do not give them fault, they are young and do not know of the old times yet. You are none of those things. In our culture, you are a sorceress, one who has the gift inherent within themselves. And one to be revered, as the gift does not come to us like that but once in a generation. We usually channel power from the land through the use of fetishes and rituals."
"Oh, ok."
"Now we must return to before. Sorceress, may you please reveal your name and your purpose here. I don't believe that you mean us ill, or you would have already smitten us with your powers."
"You are correct," Twilight replied. "I mean neither you nor any others of this land ill. My name is Twilight Sparkle, and my purpose is one of utmost importance, if you could take me to a library or a historian or something."
"Of course, Sorceress." The stallion lowered himself in a bow before Twilight. "My name is Speaker, as I have always been the one to deal with strangers to our lands, and I will do what I can to help you." Speaker rose back up and motioned for Twilight to follow him. "This reminds me of another time when a stranger entered our lands with a task of utmost importance. He wasn't like you, a Sorceress, but he was a learned stallion."
"Was his name Bookworm?"
"That is what he called himself," Speaker said as he led Twilight through the ruins. "Are you perhaps related to him? A daughter maybe? Or granddaughter?"
"No, no," Twilight said quickly. "He's more of a... mentor and teacher."
"I see. It makes sense that he'd take a student to teach what he knew." Speaker turned a corner and as Twilight followed, she found herself at the entrance to a small village nestled within a grand plaza. A dozen or so small huts made of wood and woven blankets lined the walls while ponies all similarly dressed to Speaker, and similarly all earth ponies, milled about doing everyday things; preparing food, mending clothes and equipment, watching children.
Though, as she entered, all actions came to a halt as the residents watched her with curious eyes. Speaker led her to the largest of the huts, set aside not just by its size, but by the signets and colors set on the blankets; they were the same as the crest for the kingdom.
Speaker stopped short of the entrance and motioned for her to enter. "Inside you shall find your answers, just as Bookworm did all those years ago."
Twilight gazed around at the ponies who were watching her before a familiar light caught her eyes coming from her bags. She smiled at the thought of her journal telling her that it was what she needed to do and nodded at Speaker before she entered the hut.
Trixie let the magic in her horn fade as she looked over the pair of dolls that she had created. The book had told her of the magic seals and how to open them, and it had confused her. It seemed that the magic of the time, whenever this place had been created, was completely different from what it was like today. The magic was not channeled through one's body, but through the use of small figures and baubles and the like. And even with that, the magic had to be prepared and gathered from the land through a ritual.
Luckily, it had all been described for her. The dolls were as they should be, a pair of ponies pieced together with scrap wood and cloth that she had found above. She placed the two on a pair of pedestals set on opposite sides of the vault and stood between them. Now came the time for the ritual. She shrugged off her bags and cloak and lowered herself until her belly laid on the floor as she moved her fore hooves in circles along it. She slowly rose up onto her hind legs and, while trying to keep balance, she began to spin slowly as she threw her head back and stared up at the ceiling. She dropped back down onto all fours and began to keen a tune that seemed to come from the ground itself. Soon, she was swaying along in time with it, her mind slowly forgetting the book and its instructions. Then something took her; she began to bob and weave to some unseen beat, to spin and leap and howl as the powers of the earth flowed into her.
After what seemed to be an eternity, she once again rose to her hind legs and flung her fore legs towards to two dolls. Something flowed from her hooves across the air to strike each and there was a loud crack as the wall in front of her split open to reveal a hidden entrance. Trixie dropped to the ground panting as the power left her, a smile slowly working its way across her face. The end was in sight for her. Once she got the Record she could get back home and deal with everything it entitled. She pulled herself to her hooves and grabbed her bags before setting off down the newly opened doorway.
Upon entering, Twilight was assaulted by smoke and the smell of burning herbs. As she coughed, a papery voice sounded from deeper within.
"Come in, come in, have a seat," it said. "Sorry for the smoke, it helps to channel the power." As Twilight moved further into the hut, the smoke cleared up some and she saw the voices owner. It was an ancient mare, an earth pony like all the rest, her mane and coat pure grey and her features sunken into her face, giving it the look of a skull. "Hello there, I am History, the record keeper and oracle for our clan. I have awaited your arrival for some time."
"You have?" Twilight said as she found a cushion and sat.
"Yes," History said. "The smoke told of your arrival, though nothing on why save for an image of one who I know, though he has already passed from this world. Now tell, how is what are you here for, and what does it have to do with the one named Bookworm?"
Twilight stared at the ancient mare with her mouth open a little before she shook her head and smiled. "Why am I even surprised by that anymore. Of course he'd have found his way to this place. Bookworm was here once, to deal with the Record. Well, to say the least, that is the same reason I'm here."
"So you are of the calling as well then."
"The what?"
"The calling," History repeated. "Those who are lead by the powers of this world to where they are most needed."
"The journals, you know of the order?"
"Only what the powers have granted me to know."
"I see. Speaker said that the answers I need could be found here."
"And I take it that these answers are of the utmost importance, correct?"
"They are," Twilight agreed. "There is somepony who seeks the Record. They have all the knowledge on where it is and may already be there."
History took a long look at Twilight, as if she could see the very words that she had spoken and was judging their validity. "I see. And you are not sure where that is."
"Yes," she admitted. "All the information I could find never gave anything more than an enigmatic 'hidden at the ends of the known lands'."
"Yes, that old tale. It's rather simple when you think on it," History said matter-of-factly. "Where does the known lands end for the simple viewer? Where's the place that they cannot see?"
"You mean to tell me that the Record is hidden here?" Twilight asked. "I mean right here, underground?"
"Bingo, you got it." History pulled a piece of rope that had appeared next to her and Twilight was covered in confetti. At that, Twilight thought that she may have found something to Pinkie's 'powers', but that was a thought for another time. She instead turned her thoughts to the next stage of questioning.
"The entrance is under the really big ruin isn't it?"
"Yep, the old royal palace itself. Hidden in the vaults is a secret door that is sealed with several magical locks and seals that can only be opened through a long ritual." A flash of light came from Twilight's bag again, showing that something new had appeared in her journal. "And I'm sure that you now know how to perform it, same things happened when Bookworm learned about the rituals. If the powers see fit to tell you the secrets then we shall hold it to you to protect the Record. We have been here since the fall, keeping watch over the entrance to the Record's tomb. I still remember that day, it wasn't a very pleasant one."
"Wait, you mean to tell me you―"
"Uh uh," History interrupted. "But you need to get going. This is a task that only you can fulfill. Perhaps we can talk more after you come back."
"Ok, History," Twilight said as she stood. "Thank you for the help. I just hope that I am not too late." Twilight turned and left the hut. Speaker was still waiting where he had been when she had gone in. "Speaker, I need you to take me to the palace ruins."
"As you wish, Sorceress," he said and lead her back into the ruins.
Trixie consulted the book again as she gazed down a long straight passage, it said something about traps in this place, but seemed to skip over anything important about them, like where they were or what they did. She sighed as she put the book away. "So, looks like your usefulness has come to an end for now book. Whoever wrote you must have had stupid luck if he didn't trip any of the traps, if there are any that is."
She tentatively placed a hoof ahead of her; nothing happened. She placed her weight on it and still nothing happened. Then she took another step and there was a click as a gout of flame erupted before her, singeing the ends of her hair as she pulled herself back. She looked down at where she had stepped and there was a faded symbol of a crown. She'd seen something similar in the book and thought that it was simply nonsense.
"So that's what it meant. Trap markers." Trixie slowly made her way through the hallway, keeping in mind the faded marks that covered the floor and walls. As she went on, the hallway slowly changed from a straight cut path to one of rough rock. Then, the path opened up into an immense cavern; at its center stood a large crystalline structure glowing softly giving light to the entire room. Trixie was about to rush down towards the structure, before she caught herself.
"No, no, it can't be that easy." She brought out the book and skimmed through it.
Guess I wasn't the first here. Seems that the band of thieves I was chasing has already been taken care of, their lifeless bodies were laying all over. Hmm, right there, under one of the bodies is a similar marking to those from the hallway, and it looks like they are all over. Looks like this place is just as guarded as the hallway. But this one is different. It has a much heavier air of power, as the locals say, to it. Well, that's one problem taken care of, but an even bigger one is due to show up any―
"Ok, death symbols here, just gotta be careful and make sure not to touch any by mistake."
"This is as far as I can go Sorceress," Speaker said as she halted outside the entrance to the palace ruins. "It is taboo for us to go any further."
"I understand," Twilight said. "I thank you for all your help Speaker."
"There is no need to thank me. This is my purpose. And I speak on the behalf of everypony here when I say, we hope that you succeed. The Record brings nothing but anguish and despair and we would wish that on no pony else."
Twilight looked at the stallion after he spoke. That settled it, there was something about the ponies living here. History blatantly said it, and Speaker had reaffirmed it. Whatever happened here was bad enough to keep ponies around for the eons after it. She gave Speaker a nod and ducked into the ruins.
The insides had held up little better than the outsides had, but that wasn't what she paid attention to. Off to the side of the doorway was a small area of ground that had been cleared away. It couldn't have been any of the natives, so Twilight took it to be a sign that whoever had stolen Bookworm's journal was already here. She sped off through the nearest doorway in search of a way down.
As she searched, she began to notice that there was a distinct similarity in the construction of this palace to the Castle of Canterlot. With that in mind, she turned into a new hallway and found what she was looking for, a stairway leading down. As she made her way, she noticed that there was another set of hoofprints on the dust, further cementing that she had to make haste.
Upon reaching the bottom of the stairs, she found herself in a large room that faded into shadows at the far end. A step into the room caused torches to flare to life along the walls, revealing the full scale and regality of the room. It held the same air as the grand ballroom of the Canterlot castle; it even had a raised dais at the far end that contained the remains of a pair of thrones. The walls, below the torches, held the burned remains of banners of faded gold and green each one containing the crest of the the land, the twin trees over a crown. The floor held similar markings of flames, setting Twilight's mind reeling as she tried to piece together what had happened to this place.
But like above, she saw the hoofprints in the dust and ash leading off to a doorway next to the dais and she hurried on her way. She gave a passing glance to the thrones as she ducked down the stairs and a little while later, she found herself at the entrance to the vaults. As she had assumed, there was already a door opened up on the back wall with another pair of steps leading down into the darkness.
Trixie gazed at the Record as it lay deep within its crystal tomb. She had somehow managed to make it to the center of the large cave, the book was decidedly lax on the details of the room; its writer was concerned with something else happening to record it she guessed. But here she was, and the book had the details on how to free it.
It detailed another ritual, one that, while stating that it was recommended to be done by several ponies, could be done by a sole one with time. She read over the details to it again and again, making sure to commit them to memory so that she could perform it with no interruptions.
She shed her bags once again and approached the crystal again.
As Twilight reached the bottom of the stairs, she found herself before a long straight hallway. There was something off about it to her, really off. She thought back to what she knew about the Record's resting place. Entombed in crystal, hidden behind traps. This was most likely where the traps would be. She gazed at the hallway with an attentive eye and saw a faded crown on the ground in front of a faint scorch mark. She reached out slowly and placed a hoof on that tile. A gout of flame rose before it.
"Ah ha!" Twilight said aloud as she understood the implications. "Trap markers. I guess so those guarding it wouldn't get caught themselves." She slowly made her way down the hallway, keeping a wary eye out for the marks.
Yet as she placed her hoof down on a tile with no mark, it gave way a little with a soft click.
"Uh oh," she said softly as things went downhill. A long curved blade fell from the ceiling right in front of her. She jumped back to avoid it, but she felt another tile give way as panels opened along the wall and arrows fired at her. She raised a magical shield just in time, but in her haste, she move to another tile which also gave way. A section of ceiling gave a loud groan, warning Twilight of its impending fall. She dove out of the way as it came crashing down and landed on another tile that gave way. She groaned loudly as the floor beneath her gave way to a pit filled with spikes. She caught herself with her magic and slowly lifted herself from the hole to a tile with no crown on it. She flopped down and laid there for a moment to regain her strength after having to levitate herself.
"Stupid... not marked... trap!" She raised a hoof and slammed it down on the tile she was on, only to feel it give way too. "Oh come on!"
The ceiling opened a little ways behind her and a large round boulder dropped down and began to roll towards her. Twilight got to her feet and ran down the hallway, heedless of the traps as the boulder began to gain speed.
"Ahhhh!" she screamed as she dodged between gouts of fire, ducked under arrows, and jumped over pitfalls. As she neared what she believed to be the exit, another tripped trap started a large stone slab on its descent to seal the hallway. With a giant ball of death behind her, and the exit quickly closing before her, Twilight found a reserve of speed that she didn't know she possessed and managed to slide under the stone and into the room beyond. After a moments rest, she realized that there was a familiar weight missing and she turned to look back into the closing hallway to see her bag lying just on the other side of the threshold. In a desperate act, she reached a hoof back and managed to drag the bag to her just as the stone wall came slamming down.
"Why did I just do that?" she said as she laid there, panting from exertion. "Why didn't I just grab it with my magic?" Then, a loud gasp came from the center of the room, followed by a loud shattering.
"Sparkle!?" Trixie exclaimed after she'd watched the other slide in.
"Trixie!?" Twilight responded in kind as she pulled herself to her hooves and began to move towards the center of the room. "You stole the book from me? What reason could you have had for that?"
"No, stay where you are!"
"Why should I?"
"If you don't want to die a horrible death, you'd better stay put." Trixie gestured to the bones laying about. "There are death traps all throughout this room."
"I can't, Trixie. I have to stop you from taking that Record."
"I can't, Sparkle," Trixie said as she grabbed the Record and jammed it into her bag. "You wouldn't know, but I've fallen on hard times. No pony has the time to watch a magic show anymore and this is my shot at regaining some semblance of livelihood."
"And how are you going to get out? The exit's closed"
"I don't know. I'm sure that―" And with bright flash of light, Trixie was gone, vanished into thin air. Twilight stared at where she had been, trying to figure out what just happened. She hadn't seen her horn light up in preparation for a spell. Then the reality of the situation hit her.
"I failed..." She sat back on the ground as it set in. "I failed, and I'm trapped in a cave who knows how far underground." Then came the soft glow of her journal from her bag again. She pulled it free with her magic and flipped it to the new page.
What... just happened? How could that have happened? This doesn't make any sense! Why Trixie? Why the Record? Why anything anymore!? Ugh! There's no time to sit around and think on these yet. I have to find a way out of this cave, but where... was that a breeze I felt? Yes! Up there, on the wall, a staircase leading to a door...
Twilight turned to face the wall that her journal had mentioned and sure enough, there was a doorway set halfway up with a set of stone stairs. She pulled herself up to her hooves and made her way around the outside of the room, keeping in mind what Trixie had told her about death traps, and up to the door. Some time later, she exited back into the palace and made her way to it exit. Speaker was there, waiting for her.
"How did it go, Sorceress?" he asked.
"I couldn't stop her," she replied. "I failed to save the Record..."
"So this was what History spoke of when the power said that something terrible was due to happen. I'm sure that you did all that you could. I will take the news to the village, I'm sure that you need to get back to your home to work out what to do next."
"Thank you, Speaker." Twilight began to head off towards the outlying mountains, but turned back. "Can I ask you something?"
"Of course."
"You and History, you were around for the fall weren't you?"
"So you pieced that out did you," Speaker said with a smile. "Yes, we two were around back then. We've always been around. We are the guards of the land's history. And being such, have been granted eternal life by the power. But ask not what happened to this land. I wouldn't wish that knowledge on any pony. Now you must hurry on your way."
"Thank you again, Speaker." Twilight turned back to the mountains that contained her way home and set off.
Trixie found herself in a dark room after being teleported out of the Record's tomb. She wasn't sure how she had gotten there or where she was.
"You have succeeded," a deep voice said within the darkness. "I knew that you were the right choice despite the reservations some of the others had."
"Who are you?" Trixie asked. "And what happened? How am I here?"
"Simple, Miss Trixie Lulamoon. It was a long distance teleportation spell inscribed onto those notes of yours. Through those, we could monitor your actions and collect you when you finished. As to who I am," a bright white light filled the room, illuminating a pure white unicorn stallion with a flowing white mane and tail and a cutie mark of half a mask and a lance, "I am Argent Lance. Welcome to the soon to be new rulers of this world." |
Twilight Sparkle, Librarian | The Golden Horn of Midas - Part 1 | Twilight Sparkle: Librarian
The Golden Horn of Midas - Part 1
By: Raryn
Twilight sat on the bed of her suite in Canterlot, musing, once again, over her journal and what had gone wrong during her mission to protect the Record of All-Things. She sighed again as she reached the ending of the narrative that the journal had kept.
As if responding to her thoughts, her journal gave off the familiar glow as a new passage was added. She couldn't help but take a peek at the thing, already knowing what was to fill the new pages.
Why! Why! Why! I'm useless! A failure! I couldn't even keep a book safe...
"No!" she shouted as she tossed the book away. It landed, splayed open face down and she quickly jumped up to retrieve it, looking it over to make sure that no harm had come to it. With a sigh, she sat the book on the room's desk. "I did the best I could..." Her words died out as she laid down on the floor next to the desk. No matter how many times she said it, she just couldn't manage to convince herself of that. That was one of the reasons why she had decided to remain in Canterlot rather than return to Ponyville once she had returned from the Kingdom of the Gilded Trees. It had already been a week, and she still couldn't get over her failure. Maybe if she had secured Bookworm's journal properly, maybe if she had made sure the library had been locked up properly, maybe if she had been faster in her research and action. A whole lot of maybes.
The other was that she knew that her friends would know something was wrong with her the instant they saw her, they were like that. She'd sent regular messages out though, to keep the appearance that all was well with her, but she knew that she couldn't keep that up forever. She needed to go back home at some point. "I'll need to actually talk to them all at some point... but what will I say to them?" She sighed again as she thought on the subject. "Ugh! I... need something to help clear my thoughts. What's worked before?" And without a second thought, she knew exactly what she'd do. "Of course, studying. I can go over all that's in the library on everything!"
It had already been a week since Trixie had found herself welcomed into a strange group of ponies who claimed to be the up and coming rulers of the world. And for what it was worth, she was having trouble trying to wrap her head around the whole experience. Why had she been singled out to join? Where was she? And what was this group even called? And the answer to that question was not given to her, no matter how many times she had asked Argent Lance, or any of the other members of whatever this group was called. It seemed that, while she was welcomed in, she wasn't fully trusted yet.
And it was during one of these mulling that Argent Lance found her. "Ah, Miss Lulamoon," he said as he found Trixie in the library of where ever she was. "What is that you are reading?"
"It's a history book," she replied, raising her head from the book that she'd been reading. "Apparently, whoever wrote it didn't like the way things were written in other books. Everything is at odds with what I know of history."
"Ah, yes." He grabbed the book with his magic and casually flicked it into a corner. "The history as dictated by one Historic Flare. Nonsense all of it, written by a certified insane stallion who believed that he could see into the past and the future. Nothing worth reading, but it's good to keep around for laughs. Now, I know I've asked you every day since you came here, but how are you faring with the change of scenery?"
"And like every other time," Trixie retorted, "I'd like to know where I am, what this group is, and why I'm here?"
"All in due time, Miss Lulamoon. All in due-"
"That is the only answer that I've gotten!" she shouted. "I don't care who you think you all are, but I think I deserve to know some-" Her rant cut off suddenly as she found herself unable to breathe, something seemed to be grabbing directly at her lungs.
"Knowledge is power, Miss Lulamoon," Argent Lance said as a pair of unicorns appeared at his side, their horns flaring with magic. They were a mare and a stallion who looked exactly alike; pale gray coats, messy white and black streaked manes, even the same cutie mark, a field of stars. "And if you wish to stay here, and more importantly, live, I'd suggest that you learn that quickly. Star, Comet." As he addressed the two unicorns, their magic cut out and Trixie managed a gasp as she was allowed to breath again. "I find you to be a useful asset for us, and as such, I shall grant you a small portion of our knowledge to sate your appetite for the time being. I will give you the name of our group. We are the Gilded Tales."
"Good afternoon, Ms. Sparkle." Cara, one of the 'normal' librarians greeted Twilight as she arrived. "How have you been?"
"I've been fine, Cara." Twilight forced a smile that she hoped looked convincing. "I'm just here to check on some things up on the top floor. There's no need to make a scene. Just go about your work as if I'm not here."
"Of course, Ms. Sparkle." Twilight left her employee to her work and made her way up to the third floor atrium. She took her time as she went, admiring the library in all it's refurbished glory. Everything shined in the sunlight that flowed through the skylights, and there were ponies, actual ponies coming and going, looking for books and reading. It all was a far cry from what she remembered of the place, and of what it looked like less than a month ago. After setting a standing placard at the entrance of the third floor atrium saying it was under repair and placing an empty bookcase behind it, she opened the door to her secret headquarters. And she was immediately pulled into the room by the pair of light orange hooves belonging to Golden Spade.
"About time you got here, Twilight," Golden said as she pulled Twilight into a hug. "I've checked in every day for the past... uh... what day is it?"
"Tuesday?"
"The past four days, waiting for you."
"How did you get in here?" Twilight asked. "I was pretty sure that this place was locked up and that no one could get in beside me..." Then Twilight remembered the teleportation node that was lying on the floor, in the center of the room. "Right, never mind that question. Do you need me for something?"
"Well, no, not really," Golden replied as she released Twilight. "I just kinda wanted to hear how your mission went and all that stuff. I assume that it didn't go too well, right?"
Twilight grimaced at that and turned her head away from Golden, trying to find something that she could use to steer the conversation away from this topic. It didn't work.
"I didn't know what I was getting into. I wasn't ready... if... if I had had more time or... or training or something..."
"The first mission is always the toughest, especially when you don't have a mentor." Golden walked over to a bookshelf and pulled free a book. "My first mission alone was terrible. Book Worm insisted that I do it on my own, almost died several times to simple traps and wound up destroying the thing I was trying to recover." She sat the book down on the large table and turned back to Twilight. "I know what you are feeling, Twilight. I've been there too. And that is why I'm here." She reached into a bag that was sitting next to the table and pulled out a familiar looking book, this one with a pair of crossed shovels on the cover. "Take a look." Golden opened her journal to an entry set a few days ago.
Golden, go and help out the new member already! You haven't had a mission in awhile and Twilight is in a bad way. Her mission didn't go too well, and you'll be able to relate to her experiences. She needs an experienced hoof, find her and talk with her, and then things will go from there.
"That's... very straight forward," Twilight said as she finished reading. "Not like mine at all. Mine just seems to be like rambling thoughts or something."
"Every member's journal works a bit differently," Golden replied as she flipped a few pages forward to the most recent entry. "You remember Bookworm's, his read like a travel guide and a how-to manual. But anyways, here we go, this is what I needed to show you." Twilight took a look at the pages of the journal again.
New mission: Protect the resting place of the mystical Saddlevarius violin from the infamous music thief Lumina and her henchmen.
The Saddlevarius Violin: The original was believed to hold mystical powers over all who listened to the music, holding them in thrall to the player. The violin also provided any who played it with the instant knowledge of how to play, but once it left their possession, they lost that information.
Threat level: High
Note: Bring Twilight with you this time.
"You ready for some 'on the job' training?"
Knowledge is power. Knowledge is power. Knowledge is power. That one line kept reverberating around Trixie's mind after her little 'talk' with Argent Lance. And it was a line that made more and more sense to her the longer she stayed with the Gilded Tales. Now Trixie knew why she was being kept in the dark, why all the books here were filled with lies and tall tales. She found herself walking aimlessly through the halls of wherever she was when a familiar pair of unicorns approached her.
"Greetings, Mrs. Lulamoon," Comet, the stallion, said dryly. "We do apologize for the... incident that occurred earlier."
"Uh huh," Trixie replied simply.
"It seems that you do not believe us," Star, the mare, said. "Well, that is on you. Everypony that comes to us eventually comes to an understanding of the rules that governs this place."
"Yeah, yeah, I know. Knowledge is power and upstarts that don't know how to follow that are dealt with severely." Trixie ran a hoof through her mane in frustration. "Is there some reason to this?"
"Yes," both replied.
"And that would be?"
"We are here to pass a letter on to you," Star said as Comet floated over a rolled-up letter sealed with wax. "For your eyes only, from our leader." Comet dropped the letter as Trixie's magic grasped it.
"Good day, Mrs. Lulamoon." The pair continued on their way, passing by Trixie as she watched them with a weary eye in case they decided to do something like earlier again. Once they were out of sight, Trixie broke the wax seal on the letter and unraveled it to see what it was about.
Greetings, Mrs. Trixie Lulamoon.
I regret that I am not able to bring this to your attention in person, but your next mission has been chosen. Unlike last time though, you will have to do your homework yourself.
You will still be allowed access to Bookworm's journal, as what you will be going after was once handled by him. But aside from that, you will need to gather your equipment and plan your travels accordingly. You will be allowed restricted access to the actual library of the Gilded Tales as well as to our stores. And you may recruit two followers to assist you.
Now, what you will be retrieving is the fabled Horn of King Midas. I wish you luck. ~A
"I hate him so much." Trixie rolled up the letter and put it away and sighed. "Midas... why do I feel I've heard that name before. Time to find this library." |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | pre | "You are a lady of grace," I told her solemnly and Spike made grumbling noises.
"Do you like fish, Spike?" I asked.
"I love fish," he said, drooling a little.
I tossed him a piece. "I don't know if it's Applejack or Fluttershy's recipe."
He gobbled it down and looked mollified. "Thanks, Marcus."
"You're welcome," I told him. "Will we be standing watches?" I asked, yawning.
"I used my copy of Hallonica House's Guide to Handy Travel Rituals," Twilight said, "To put up Eyes and Ears of Warding. They'll alert us."
Basically, invisible eyes and ears look and listen for trouble, then wake you. Quite effective against those who can't disarm a ward. Mind you, with regard to Hallonica House's guide, Hallonica simply acted as ghost-publishers for Prince Jaggar, who wrote it to raise money for his private army. Since many people hate Glantrians but no one hates Darokin, the deal made a lot of people wealthy.
This, I believe, is the very definition of 'honest graft', and I applaud it.
"If you have the components, you might want to put up Volospin's Air Shield also," I told her. "There may be invisible things afoot." I used to have a copy of that ritual book, but my copy is in the stomach of an undead crocodile in Ylarum now. Along with the magical harp I once had AND one of my previous hands.
"You study magic too?" Twilight asked.
"I dabble in it, but I am not on the level of a full professional," I told her. "I seem to end up getting all my ritual books destroyed constantly." I can do a few tricks and I have a nice attack spell with fire.
"I'd be happy to loan you some of mine," Twilight said. Another sign she is a Pony and not a normal wizard.
"Thank you, kind lady," I told her. "I am short on necessary components too, though I expect I can improvise for some." If I am really lucky, she has one for re... getting a new hat.
She tossed me two, then said, "Oh dear, it's late, Spike has to go to bed and I should sleep too." Her voice sounded odd.
"I'm fine, I'm a big boy," Spike said, then yawned.
"Enjoy the books, we're going to bed!" Twilight said, grabbed Spike somehow and bolted.
Then she spoke a few words and produced a magical tent, into which she dragged Spike; I could hear muffled conversation.
I slid the books to one side; Twilight would have started reading immediately, but I have manners when they are useful.
"I don't mind if you read them," Rarity said.
"It's fine, I'll read when you go to bed," I told her.
She smiled brightly and we conversed for a while; I told her more about Thyatis and she told me about how Twilight had come to Ponyville and ended up leading the six of them on a secret mission. Which she couldn't talk about but which clearly involved getting the Elements of Harmony. Then she told me of some of their other adventures.
Eventually, she yawned. "Well, Princess Luna may stay up all night, but I must sleep."
"I'll be up reading a while," I told her. "Goodnight, fair lady." I paused. "Princess Luna?"
"Celestia's sister," Rarity said, then looked nervous a moment. "She makes the moon rise and set."
Which I thought Celestia ALSO claimed as her doing.
"I must admit I have never heard of her," I told Rarity.
"She's been off on a long trip," Rarity said, her voice wobbling; she was lying. But why?
Celestia must be pulling some really deep maneuver
I put it out of my head; it wasn't my worry as I was not going back to Ponyland, because whatever Celestia will do if she gets her hooves on me, it won't be pretty.
I bid Rarity goodnight after helping her to set up her tent, then I went to do a little reading by moonlight.
******************
I am well familiar with Hallonica House's Guide, though I skimmed through it again just to be sure I hadn't forgotten something useful, like something that gets rid of Dragons without having to risk acid slowly rendering your flesh into a tasty slurry.
There was in fact, a ritual to make things acid-resistant which I carefully bookmarked. It had a check mark by it, which I hope either indicates Twilight already thought of this or at least that it works well and she's used it before.
I noticed she'd circled two rituals: one of them gives you big butterfly style wings, but the thaum cost is hideous. Thaums, for those of you unversed in wizardry, are the unit which measures how exhausting a ritual is. Most rituals cost either a thaum or a fraction thereof, most commonly a decithaum. This one cost SIX thaums. I would probably fall unconscious if I tried to pull that off, sadly.
Not that I want fluffy butterfly wings, but flying... would be VERY useful.
The other one was for walking on clouds. Only 2 decithaums, quite reasonable, though it does require an ounce of roc unguent per person. The words 'Big Success' were penciled in, and I smiled. Pegasi ponies can walk on clouds and build cloud cities; I expect Twilight visited one. Good for her, getting out and around some.
I could hear Spike snoring over in her tent. She'd always been kind of reclusive; seeing her out in the world had surprised me a lot. But despite knowing this had to either end in me running for my life or me dying horribly, it was good to see her again, despite the constant low level fear.
I hadn't run away because I didn't like her. She was good company and it was nice to talk to someone smart enough to actually keep up with me. I like ladies, but normally, I seem to end up with... not idiots, but they usually aren't even close to Twilight's level of brains. A lot of smart women seem to shun me for some reason.
But humans and ponies are not meant to date. Everyone has their limits. Even I have my limits.
I need a smoke.
So I got my now dry tobacco and loaded up my pipe. At least I got to keep my new pipe; soon, the belly-dancer engraving was dancing. However, it's hard to see it while you're smoking. Still, I find it endlessly amusing.
The other book was Maeglin Woodwalker's Book of Practical Rituals; I had heard of it, but never touched a copy. For some reason, Umbarth House had stopped printing it fifty years ago and no one else had bothered to violate the copyright.
Which made me a little nervous, as normally Darokinians treat copyright as a courtesy warning, not something to actually STOP someone. Typically, by the time you win a suit in their courts, the copyright period has expired or you both die of old age.
This gives Elves and Dwarfs an edge in suits, I admit.
Maeglin Woodwalker was a great hero who stopped many rampaging monsters, found a lot of treasure and wrote several books to raise money to make potent magical items with. However, he mysteriously vanished about a century ago, which is why Umbarth House had felt free to print his book without paying him anything.
Until they stopped.
Hmm, maybe he's secretly alive and enforcing his copyrights. That would explain a lot.
A version of Terjon's Fabulous Floating Discs and the ritual component is SWAMP GRASS. Twilight had circled this one and I stared. It could NOT possibly be that easy.
TWO THAUMS. OWW. So you get easy, cheap use but you have to burn your own life force like crazy. Of course, Twilight has thaums coming out the... horn... so for her, this is perfect. Especially given she's not physically strong even for a Unicorn.
I puffed away at my pipe, looking for rituals of use. There was one for removing curses which required a 'large diamond'. Way to be vague, Maeglin. It had the pencil note 'Ask Rarity for diamonds'.
Only now did it sink into my brain that Rarity has three diamonds on her flank. Or some sort of clear, slightly blue gem. If she can create diamonds from nothing or summon them...
Ooooooooohhhhhhhh.
I kept reading; several more rites of use, I noticed. Indeed, I went ahead and did one of them, which made my clothing more water-resistant. It just asked for a few decithaums, which I could easily handle.
Why had Twilight circled a ritual for summoning sweater vests? I guess that wouldn't hurt for winter-time but I would think you'd get one that didn't actually fit a pony. She must have circled that one a while back; the lead was somewhat faded. It had a double check mark by it, though.
I eventually finished my pipe, then decided to sleep; the last thing I need is to be so tired I do something foolish like steal Applejack's hat in my sleep.
I paused then paged through the book; no hat-summoning rituals, dammit.
I did another simple ritual to summon a pillow, then laid down in the grass and slept.
**************
"I have a ritual at home," Twilight said apologetically. "None of us usually wear hats except Rarity and Applejack."
"I would gladly make you a hat if I was at home, but I fear I am short on materials," Rarity said, sighing. "I have made some magnificent hats, but they're over a hundred miles away from here." She patted my shoulder.
I had eggs, peaches, and bread for breakfast; it was pretty good. I don't know where Fluttershy got the eggs, but I wasn't going to question it; I just thanked her for it.
"Ivan and I should go take a bath," I told them. "We'll go downstream a little so you don't have to watch. Rarity, do you think you can clean our clothing? And does anyone have any towels or soap?"
"Always carry a towel," Rainbow Dash said, throwing us one.
Applejack had one as well, while Rarity had soap.
"You don't need to go downstream, though," Dash said. "We're all naked anyway."
I can't talk to Ivan in private to ensure we don't die if we're right here. I did my best to stammer in an embarrassed manner.
"Rainbow Dash, there are things which are done and things which are not done," Rarity said firmly. "If they desire privacy for bathing, then we shall give them privacy." She held the towels up with her powers so we could strip behind them so she could clean our clothing in our absence.
"Ain't much use in getting clean; we're gonna be knee deep in filth by lunch," Applejack pointed out.
"They've seen us naked, it's only fair if we see them naked," Rainbow Dash said, hovering, legs folded in front of her chest.
"Yeah, I'm totally naked all the time unless it's a formal occasion," Spike said. "Though I wouldn't say no to a mustache"
A mustache?
We finished stripping, then Rarity fastened the towels around our waists with a loose knot. "Thank you, fair lady," I said to her.
"Your modesty is quite fetching," she said, smiling at me and cocking her head slightly.
That is something I NEVER thought anyone would say to me.
Ivan muttered something and I tried to very subtly frog-punch him. NOT NOW.
"Fetching what?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"What?" Rarity asked.
"Yes, what is... wait, who is named Modesty and what are they fetching?" Rainbow Dash asked.
I prayed this was a pony joke.
"Don't worry about it," Rarity said to Rainbow Dash. "Just let them be."
"It's really not a big deal," Applejack said. "What if an alligator jumps them while they're around the bend? They could get eaten." She frowned at the thought.
Fluttershy said something too soft for me to hear but she looked worried.
Pinkie said, "I could go with them and keep watch." She got up on her hind legs in a stance reminiscent of a bear. "They'll be TOTALLY safe with Pinkie on guard!"
"Pinkie, you really ought to just let them go. I'm sure they'll be fine," Twilight said nervously.
Her being nervous was making ME nervous. Why is she saying it's okay but she's nervous about...
Oh, THAT incident. Which I had forgotten about.
She just couldn't wait to tell me about something she'd read and of course, I was trying to take a bath and wacky embarrassment ensued but nothing bad came of it. Back in my days in Canterlot. When I was blond and tall. I miss that body.
"Come, my dear friend Ivan," I said, dragging him off. "Thank you, everyone, for the towels and the soap." I now hustled Ivan down around the bend.
As we went, I could hear Twilight trying to whisper and half-shouting to the others, "Humans get really embarrassed when you see them naked, then they run around in a panic and fall down and injure themselves or worse. You're going to embarrass them." Her voice was urgent.
"How in Celestia's name do they reproduce?" Applejack asked, sounding dubious. "You can't mate with your clothes on, you know."
We got round the bend and I couldn't hear anything except the panicked tone of Twilight's voice.
"Remember, the better your manners and the more favors you do them, the more they'll reciprocate," I hissed to him once I thought we were out of their earshot. "And follow my lead, I know ponies."
"Are you seriously trying to score with a pony?" he asked me. The fact that he didn't sound very surprised was the most aggravating part. "Is that why you got that tattoo?"
I have a tattoo of a five-jack hand at cards, one of each of the five suits, and it IS on my left buttock, and it was not one of my wiser decisions, but I was DRUNK OFF MY ASS. Sadly, it has no magic, unless you count reminding me of my younger, stupider days. I am a fair hand at cards, though. "NO. I am trying to maintain good relations. Part of that is figuring out what each pony wants and giving it to them," I said firmly to him. "I am not looking to spawn a new line of centaurs."
We both started getting clean; while Applejack was right, I need that brief moment of clean so I don't sink into abject dementia before lunch. "So what is the plan?"
"I don't know," I said. "If we're lucky, Twilight will turn it into a cow or something," I continued. "She had huge amounts of power and now she has even more. Also, Twilight told me that Fluttershy has some sort of stunning spell which might be useful." I rubbed my forehead. "We discussed a lot of options, but they're all risky. I don't know if even Twilight can just polymorph a Grand Wyrm."
"They seem awfully optimistic about this," Ivan said.
"Ponies are hopeful by nature and apparently they have dealt with dragons before," I told him. "Once we get closer, we can decide if we need to run for the hills or stick it out or what."
"So, basically, we don't have a plan and you want some Pony loving so you're going to hold on and hope the universe saves us for no good reason," Ivan said, frowning as he worked on his legs.
My hands clenched. "I am just trying to ensure our survival, Ivan," I said. "And a shot at the treasure if they are right and they can handle it." I could mention the Elements of Harmony but Ivan would probably try to steal them and hock them for ale and whores.
This is why we can never go back to the Minrothad Guilds.
The Water Elves are REALLY vengeful, let me warn you.
"It's not like YOUR plan worked," I continued, trying to scrub my back.
This is why I like to stay at very high-class inns with sexy women who help you bathe. Instead, I am in a swamp, using soap with a picture of a duck carved into it, while standing waist-deep in water with strands of swamp weed in it, while fish tickle my legs.
At least I have both legs.
Why does this soap have a duck on it?
I started to feel more human as the soap did its work; Rarity had mostly cleaned me up yesterday but just sleeping in the swamp had given me new layers of filth.
I HATE THE MALPHEGGI.
"But we ARE naked," I heard Applejack say distantly.
You are never naked so long as you have a nice hat.
"This Dragon has a HELL of a treasure," Ivan said, now working on his arms. You could see his freckles now. I suppose the Ponies would say he's dappled. "Most importantly, he's got the Lock picks of Asterius."
"Seriously?" I said. Holy shit, that's.. anyone who picks locks at all would give their left nut for those. Then use them to steal their left nut back.
"Yeah," Ivan said. "He gave me a vision," he said softly.
"Wait, what?" I said.
"Asterius. I... I'm a candidate for Immortality, I think."
I stared. IVAN? What kind of crazy...
You know, it does make sense for Asterius. I was jealous now. "Holy shit, man, why didn't you say it before?"
"Because probably half the people I recruited would have knifed me for it, and you were drunk off your ass until it was too late," Ivan said, now working on his neck. "I'm sure there's probably some Immortal with their eye on you by now."
"Valerias, I hope," I said, eyes crossing at the thought.
"She has a boyfriend, you know," Ivan said. While neither of us is very religious, I DO know Ixion and Valerias have been an item forever.
But I also know she has a wandering eye.
"I am a man willing to share," I told him, working on my face.
Ivan began laughing very loudly.
"The man who dragged me into a quest without telling me doesn't get to laugh. Tell me you wouldn't happily just have a little of Valerias' time!" I pointed at him.
"Okay, okay, yes," he mumbled, looking embarrassed.
Ivan the Immortal. The idea scares me, but hey, having an Immortal who owes me would be VERY convenient. I'm surprised Asterius didn't eye someone more subtle and clever, though.
Not that I'm thinking of anyone in PARTICULAR.
"So what are we going to do if they find out whatever the hell you did that you're trying to hide?" Ivan asked me.
I believe the word is 'die'.
"If I have to, I will attempt the flight ritual," I told him. Assuming I can actually stay conscious through it, which I am not sure of, having never tried anything that powerful. "That means only two of them could pursue us."
Until Twilight gives herself wings and hunts us to the ends of Mystara and beyond, anyway.
"And Fluttershy's too nice to really chase us down," Ivan said. "Dash, though, she's not mean, but I think she'd enjoy kicking our ass, just to show off she could do it."
I fear that too. But hopefully, we can handle one pony who is not Twilight.
Maybe this will go smoothly and we won't end this running for our lives. At least there's plenty of water to douse flaming asses here.
We discussed ideas for dealing with dragons as we finished washing, then I said, "I really wish I could get my back cleaner."
"I'll help," a woman said.
I passed her the soap and I could feel my back getting clean, but then I saw Ivan staring at me.
Then I realized two things.
One, we were not alone.
Two, IT WAS PINKIE.
I panicked and ran for my life instinctively, images of clinging to a tree branch to the smell of wet horse and wet Ivan in my mind. I heard Ivan shouting about something and then I streaked (literally) through the camp, unable to overcome my survival instincts. Rarity was shouting and Dash said something about size and Twilight was yelling angrily.
OF COURSE I RAN INTO QUICKSAND.
DAMN THIS SWAMP AND MY PANIC REFLEX!
And, of course, I worried about how much she'd heard as I worked on drowning.
There was a flash of light and Twilight landed next to me. "It's okay, I brought you a... ack!"
She immediately sank into the quicksand, towel and all. I grabbed the towel and donned it. "Try to float, don't move too much or it'll stir the suction," I told her. Or something.
"I don't know how to float, I brought a book on swimming but I didn't have time to read it because we had to get to the Dragon quickly!," Twilight said, flailing and sinking.
I caught hold of her hooves. "Pull yourself together," I told her.
She was breathing hard. "Just relax," I said, then sighed. "I'm sorry I got you into this, Twilight."
"I told Pinkie to leave you two your privacy," she said in frustration. "But she got curious or... something... I'm sorry, they don't understand humans and how they need their privacy," she said. "He... Anyway." She sighed. "I think we're stable. I have some Phoenix feathers I stored some spells in, but I can't get them out of my bag and I can't concentrate enough to cast them myself without sinking and drowning." She sounded frustrated.
"We just need to hold on until they find us," I told her. If she could teleport again, we'd be fine, but teleporting tends to drain thaums like crazy. It's more than I can handle. Phoenix feathers? Nice. You can store a spell just shy of completion in one, then complete it in just a few seconds. Great for those times when you need to dispel a ward and don't have a half hour to spend on it because someone is shooting flaming arrows at you.
I guess once Ivan is an immortal... assuming that wasn't someone conning him... Of course it was. Asterius would clearly want someone smarter who understands the whole idea of buttering people up. Poor guy, he's being rooked. Those lock picks probably will eat his soul or something. I can't let that happen to him. But would he even listen if I warned him?
I may have to steal them myself to protect him.
It's for his own good, really. Then we can find out who set him up for this.
"Twilight, do you know anything about quests for immortality?" I asked her.
I could hear distant shouting and running about and something about snakes. "OVER HERE," I shouted to them.
Now I am going to have to take another bath, dammit.
One without any pink horses.
"A little," she said. "I have read Ilsundal's memoirs. And Celestia had me read up on the Pearl the Water Elves of Minrothad used to have that got stolen."
Ahahaha.
"The Wonderbolts recovered it and returned it to them in return for a trade deal. They're very great adventurers," Twilight said a little wistfully. "Rainbow Dash is a good friend of them."
It's good I have trained myself not to show fear or I would just die now.
Well, not show fear except when I panic.
Ahaha.
There was more yelling and something about lizardmen and a noise like someone getting hit in the head with something.
"Oh no, we need to help them," Twilight said, trying to swim but now we sank deeper from her flailing. I managed to keep her head above the surface, barely.
"Careful," I said to her. "We almost went under."
She looked around, then saw a vine. "I am going to telekinesis the vine over. We'll wrap it around you and then you can climb up it while I hold onto you and we'll be out."
"Will it really hold your weight and mine?" I asked, worried. I could help her do it; I know a little magic, though I'm not nearly at her level. She can telekinesis a cow, I can move a couple of coins or a coin purse And so on. I do have a big boom flame spell I'm rather proud of.
Setting the forest on fire would, however, not help.
"You pull yourself out, then you can get the others, and I'll tread quicksand," she said, frowning.
"I can't just leave you in here," I told her. She'll probably drown herself, then Celestia will make me into a puddle of slime and banish me to the moon. A cesspool on the moon.
Who the hell is this 'Luna' person?
Celestia is up to something, I can smell it.
She turned a little red. "I got you into this," she said.
"I'm the fool who panicked and ran into quicksand; you were just trying to save me," I told her.
"Rarity is going to kill me," she said to the quicksand, staring at it.
"Since you didn't dump me or Rarity into this, I am sure she will only be worried over you being okay," I told her. "This is not your fault. Let's try the vine. The worst that can happen is that it breaks."
"And then you fall back in and my weight pulls you to the bottom and you drown and then Rarity makes me into a hat for your tombstone!" Twilight said in a panic. She started thrashing and we now were just barely above the surface. Our heads, anyway.
"I am sure she would not make a friend into a hat, even if she was angry. And if you thrash, we sink," I said, trying to calm her. "Try the vine anyway."
She pulled the vine over, but when I tried to use it, it broke. "That always works in stories," I muttered.
"I'm sorry," she said.
"It's okay," I told her. "If we stay calm, they'll find us. Or do you remember the flight ritual?" I asked her with sudden insight.
"It's really hard and I don't think I can do it and not drown at the same time," she said. "Hmm, maybe I can lift you out, and then you can braid vines to make a rope to pull me out."
"Try it," I told her.
I could still hear chaos in the distance. Then several lizardmen fled past us with fruit splattered across their faces. I couldn't help but laugh a little.
She lifted me out and I made a vine rope, but unfortunately, I wasn't actually strong enough to get her out, though now she was head and shoulders above the surface. I kept trying until, suddenly, the vine moved and I fell backwards and she flew out and over my head, landing on Applejack, who had somehow come up without me noticing. And Pinkie, who now was covered in muck.
"Thank you," I told them, trying to bow.
"Ain't nothin', sugarcube," Applejack said, amused. "I guess you two will need another bath now."
"I'll get you another towel and some more soap!," Twilight said, then teleported off.
Like she could have done earlier.
TWILIGHT!!!!
"I'm sure she'd be happy to scrub your back," Pinkie said cheerfully. "Are you okay?" she then said.
"I'm fine," I said. "Except for embarrassment and nearly dying and nearly taking someone with me." My guilt and my frustration were hitting each other with maces.
"I just wanted to help," Pinkie said. "I thought Twilight was exaggerating." She sounded embarrassed too.
"What happened with the lizardmen?" I asked.
"Pinkie thought she heard something, then kind of got distracted but it was them," Applejack said. "They panicked when you ran naked and then we spotted them. Ivan fights pretty well," she said.
"I hope no one's hurt," I said. Fluttershy probably has some healing but not a lot.
"Nothing too serious," Applejack said. "We're tough little ponies."
Twilight appeared with a fresh towel and soap. "Okay, I promise you, I'll sit on Pinkie until you're done."
"I'll help you clean up, Twilight!" Pinkie said cheerfully to her. "Enjoy your bath, Sammie!"
"Honestly, you're just gonna get dirty AGAIN," Applejack said.
It's the principle of the thing. I am VERY principled.
**************
I couldn't actually say no to the sweater vest which Twilight gave me as an apology, though it'll be warm in this swamp. It had 'TS' blazoned on it, but Rarity rewove it into 'SM' for me.
"I'm so sorry," she said softly to me. "I understand the importance of maintaining some dignity and privacy."
We'd gotten underway and were now trudging through the swamp.
"Thank you, and thank you for reweaving it," I told her, patting her back and she smiled.
"Anything for a friend," she said.
The ritual didn't mention monogramming your true name on it when you summon it. I'd best not risk that one, not that I am likely to need ANOTHER sweater vest in the swamp.
"Is it because they're so small there?" Rainbow Dash whispered to Twilight.
Twilight turned twelve shades of red and babbled about the uses of garlic.
What is... NURG.
Rarity sighed. "She's a dear friend; she would have dove down to the bottom of the quicksand to save you. But no one can do everything well."
"I didn't see any garlic," Rainbow Dash said hesitantly.
"Rainbow Dash, please come over here," I said.
Twilight made an 'I'm sorry' gesture as Rainbow Dash ZOOMED over. "Hey, what's up, Marcus?" she asked with a kind of hearty fellow well met tone I know well. It's the sound of someone trying to bluff past a faux paux.
"Humans typically only get naked for bathing and sex," I told her. "It's generally frowned on to run around naked in front of people of the opposite sex, though married couples and lovers may bathe together. Or parents with young children."
"Why?" she asked.
"It embarrasses people," I told her. Especially when it's insane pink ponies.
"That is not an answer," she said, frowning. "Saying it embarrasses you because it embarrasses you."
"Too much seeing each other naked usually sends humans into heat," I said, trying to put it in pony terms.
Her eyes crossed. "But you're seeing me naked ALL THE TIME," she said in a sudden panic.
"But I'm not naked," I told her. "Also, naked ponies doesn't set us off or we'd be in trouble."
She gave a sigh of relief. "I can see how that would be embarrassing."
"Anyway, it's okay. I've made a fool of myself, nearly died, and now I'm mostly clean and it's all good," I told her. Pinkie is going to be the death of me if Twilight and Celestia aren't first. "So I hear you're a weather pony?"
"Yeah. But it's a LOT harder outside Equestria. I don't know how you all stand the crazy random weird weather out here," she said, looking around. "Why make it this hot? I'm surprised everything doesn't wither."
"The Malpheggi has been like this for hundreds of years; the plants all got used to it," I told her. "Do you think you could make a dense fog?"
"Hah! EASY," she said and started to zoom up.
"No wait, not yet!" I shouted and she came back.
"Oh wait, you're thinking we could fog up the dragon's entrance to his lair, so he comes out to fight us and gets lost, right?" Rainbow Dash said excitedly.
"Yes," I said, surprised. Unknowing, not stupid, I told myself, revising her profile in my head. "Are we going to fight him? Or what?"
"I think we will try to negotiate a deal first, then fight if we have to," Rarity said. "Dragons are dangerous." She shivered.
"Oh, I showed that last one what for," Rainbow Dash said, miming punches. "I can take him down," she said confidently.
I looked at Rarity, who shook her head. "I know you will fight valiantly," she said to Dash.
Exactly the way to do it.
"Is that armor?" Rainbow Dash asked me.
"My leather can reduce damage from blades," I told her.
"No, the fuzzy thing." Dash touched my sweater vest
"It's a gift from Twilight," I said. Rarity had to adjust it; it was cut more for a human woman. It's pretty stylish, but hot.
Dash looked at Rarity, looked at me, looked back at Twilight, who was reading and marching at the same time, then said, "Okay," sounding a little confused.
"I adjusted it to fit him," Rarity said, smiling a little.
"OH," Dash said. She relaxed.
Dammit, I am not getting something.
I suddenly felt INTENSE DEATH GAZE.
It was Spike, trying to set me on fire just for being alive. Does he know? He certainly has the 'DIE IN A FIRE' gaze down. Why else would he care?
Dash said, "Time to go play with Spike! He can help me scout!"
She swooped over, grabbed him and flew off with him.
"Please tell me I didn't trample him in my panic," I said to Rarity.
She sighed. "It's nothing, darling. He's still quite young and you know how children are."
"I know," I told her. "I was a child once." It feels like another universe.
Possibly it was, given some of my mishaps.
Deep beneath the Great School of Magic in Glantri City, there is a door. It is labeled 'Do Not Open EVER.' Of course Sergei opened it.
If you ever find it, DO NOT OPEN IT or visit the plane on the other side of it. Dimension. I don't know what it was, but I AM NEVER GOING BACK.
We chatted as the quest continued forwards.
*************
"You're a farmer?" I asked Applejack as we rumbled on through the swamp. Dash thought we could reach close to the lair tonight, which means tomorrow we scout out the area and figure out a plan. I was taking this chance to circulate and feel out the rest of the party.
"I'm a fair hand in a scrap but my real talent is growing apples," Applejack said. Which does, admittedly, match her Cutie Mark. I suppose she mainly fights with her lasso, which she's quite nimble with.
"How good are you at lassoing something in the air?"
"Depends on how fast it's goin'," she said.
Earth Ponies are mind-bogglingly strong, or at least some are. I know it only takes four to pull a 'train' and those things must weigh tons. "I'm wondering if you could snare a dragon's leg and pull it to the ground. Maybe even making it crash if it was going too fast to stop."
"It would have to fly a mite low for me to reach, but I reckon I could," she said thoughtfully. "Depends on the size, mind you. Dragons can be a mite huge."
"Someone could bait it to fly low, then you could snag it," I mused. "You're from Ponyville, right?"
"Ever been there?" she asked.
"I must confess I don't even know where to find it on a map. My apologies," I told her. "I only know the big picture of Equestrian geography."
"About forty-eight miles northwest of Fort Nar, between Cloudsdale and Hoofington," Applejack said. "There's no direct route from Ponyville to Fort Nar, though; they'd have to go through the Everfree and only crazy people and us do that." She shook her head.
Okay, that pins it down pretty well for me. "Seems dangerously close to the Malpheggi."
"First you hit the Everfree, THEN you hit the Malpheggi," she said. "Mind you, the Everfree ain't no better than this, though I guess it is drier."
"So what brought you to join an adventuring party?" I asked curiously. She doesn't seem like she has the need to go plunging into danger like Ivan and I do. Admittedly, in part because she likely never has to run for her life.
"Ah do mah part to defend Ponyville and Equestria," Applejack said. "I ought to be home working the farm, but if this dragon keeps raiding, I may end up with NO farm. And of course, I can't just let my friends get in trouble with out me." She shook her head. "How about you?"
"I have too much curiosity for my own good," I told her and she laughed, but I laughed too. "Seems like the world wants me to wander. I hate the Malpheggi, but mostly I like seeing new places."
"Then you should come back to Ponyville with us, stay for a while," she said. "It's a good town, very friendly, and maybe you'd get rid of that case of the nervous nellies you've got." Her voice was blunt but not hostile.
I laughed nervously. She is... honesty... uuurgh. "The Malpheggi makes me nervous." That IS true. Can she detect lies? How fucked am I? "And the other thing, that's just how humans are raised."
"Didya come from a noble family?" she asked curiously.
"No, but I've been around nobles enough to come off well in high society," I told her. "Your family probably has more money than mine did." I think. I don't remember my childhood well any more and sometimes it seems like my memories contradict each other.
But the past is dead and gone, right?
And I am not.
"Then you'd be fine in Ponyville. No pretensions there. Well, a little from Rarity, but it seems to me you like that." She gave me a look which made my marrow shake; there was a kind of odd cunning to it, like she was seeing through to the heart of me.
"I must confess I enjoy elegant company, but please don't take that as a slight," I told her. "Ivan and I are old friends, and he is rather rough, as you've no doubt noticed. But we always look out for each other." Which is why I can't let this fake immortal sucker him.
"He's not what you'd call smooth," Applejack said, watching him talking to Rainbow Dash; they were both laughing loudly. "But I don't look for smooth m'self."
"The best friends are different from you; their strengths cover your weaknesses, their weaknesses, you cover with your strengths. Everyone can't be good at everything, but the sum is more than the whole of its parts. As Didymus said in his Machina Explicata, 785 AC." This is in chapter 12, 'Never Split the Party'. A very useful book for a man of adventure like myself.
"So you're a scholar like Twilight, too?"
"I dabble in many things," I told her. "You can call me a jack of all trades." Her hat now tried to tempt me but I ignored it. "I do a little magic." I called on one of my best learned tricks, snapping off two branches, then making them sword fight in the air. "I can't move nearly the weight a Unicorn can, but I can move lightweight things, light small fires, do some other tricks. I have a couple of combat spells. And I can do fancier things if I have a book of rituals. Unfortunately, every book I own usually dies horribly within a month or two." I sighed. "Or I end up giving it to someone."
"I guess that's the price of wanderin' so much," Applejack said. "I had some wanderlust when I was younger, went down to Manehattan, but in the end, I didn't feel right until I came back home," she said thoughtfully. "You been back to Thyatis, lately?"
"Not for a while," I told her. "So you went to Manehattan?" She doesn't sound like a Manehattanite.
She now told me the whole story, which you probably already know. In brief, she dreamed of the sophisticated big city, went to live there, got lonely for the country, came home, and settled down, content to be a country girl.
It reminded me, though, of the Shearing in Karameikos; many kids go to their parents, get their hair cut and set out to see the world around fifteen, sixteen, seventeen or so. Most of those Sheared return home after a few years, their youthful rebellion spent, money in pocket, ready to settle down and become adults. Those who don't, they had too much wild in them to have settled down happily. They're happier in the world. Everyone wins. Ivan was one of those who never came back.
For some reason, the trees were moving. I blinked at them; wondering why Applejack was turning different colors. "Are you trying to blend like a chameleon?"
"Whoah there, Marcus, you don't look so hot."
"I'm fine, it would be rude of me to discard this fine gift," I said, suddenly aware of how hot I was and how much I was sweating.
I should take this off, really but it's probably a magical sweater of protection or something that Twilight made and the world is spinning, oh dear...
THUNK.
*****************
I awoke, sans sweater vest At least I was on nice dry grass. "I am alive, right?"
"You betcha," Applejack said. "Does your head hurt?"
It was resting on something soft. "Am I using someone as a pillow?"
"It's me," Pinkie said behind me. "Feeling better?"
"Yes," I said.
"I'm so sorry," Rarity said, sounding guilty.
"Me too," Twilight said, worried.
"It's okay," I said. "A gift should be cherished in the spirit it was given. It felt good to be in something new and clean I hadn't worn for days and days over and over," I said grandly, trying to stand. I wobbled but rose, leaning on Rarity as she moved over to me. "And I couldn't let your work go to waste, Rarity." No one kisses ass like I kiss ass. I am a true master. Here's another order of curried favor!
"Save it for cold weather," Rarity said, smiling. "Twilight froze some ice to put on your head; I hope it helped."
"It feels much better," I said.
I could see Ivan shaking his head, but I just smiled. "And thank you, Twilight," I said to her.
"I didn't even think about it being more of a winter item," Twilight said. She frowned. "The book just assumes you know."
"Well, it was written with humans in mind. I expect I wouldn't know which plants are safe to eat and which not in Equestria, but you do," I told her. That cheered her up a little.
I have to keep my head about me. Currying favor at the expense of my own health is, I think, a little too far, when I need to ensure that I don't die horribly at the hands of a dragon soon.
I have to keep my wits about me and not bake my brain.
I wish I could hold onto that until winter; it would be nice, but I suspect it will go the way of all my wealth.
Such is my life, a life of poverty and fits of terror with brief moments of joy that enable me to go on. But it beats staying at home. Whatever Applejack may think.
*************
A little later, as we were traveling, Rainbow Dash said to me, "I hear you know magic stuff, right?"
"Yes," I told her.
"Good, you can come scout with me; I'll look for normal stuff, you handle the magic," she said.
Shit. I HATE SCOUTING. But I can't back out now without looking pathetic; it won't matter once I run for the hills, but until then, I have to look cool, admirable, fearless.
"I don't know if I can keep up with you," I told her. "You fly very quickly."
"I fly so fast, I can outrun SOUND," she said. "Perfect stealth."
Okay, I am VERY envious.
I could use that.
"Isn't it hard to see anything at that speed?" I asked.
"Umm, yeah. It's only for wide open spaces," she said, then sighed. "Anyway, I think you can ride me; you don't look too heavy."
"Okay, if you don't mind."
"Twilight insisted I take you," Rainbow Dash said, shrugging. "And yeah, someone to find magic stuff would be good; there may be dragon magic traps or something."
I studied Rainbow Dash. "I'm too big to ride you, though."
"We have a clever plan," Rainbow Dash said.
That doesn't bode well.
She took me back to where Twilight Sparkle was studying a book intently. "Okay, I believe this spell will let me make Rainbow Dash big enough to carry you without making her too big."
Spike laughed and Twilight frowned. "I know what I'm doing THIS time," she said.
"I need to be at least twenty percent bigger," Rainbow Dash said. Rarity snorted, and Applejack and Pinkie both laughed loudly. Spike grinned too.
I don't get it. Ivan laughed. What does he know that I don't?
Unless this like that Alph... no, no, I am still trying to forget that.
Twilight began chanting and I felt the glow of magic. This was Enlarge Person or something similar. Pretty easy low level magic. She carefully pronounced each syllable from the book and light washed over Rainbow Dash, who grew about thirty percent bigger. "I could make you really big, but it will last longer this way," Twilight said.
Rainbow Dash was about the size of those steppe ponies the Ethengars use, but much more colorful and, well, both more benevolent and more intelligent. Those things are bastards like their owners.
"Sweet," Rainbow Dash said, stretching her bigger wings. "Come on, Marcus, mount up!"
I mounted up and she took to the skies. I held on as best I could, feeling mounting terror, gripping me so tightly that I couldn't even cry out in fear. She was grinning manically as she zoomed up and over the swamp, moving in a complex search pattern, while I tried to keep an eye out for anything arcane. My ass began to hurt more and more as I'm not used to riding horses.
There was something... "Back up, I think I saw something by that pool."
The pool in question was maybe forty feet across with muck on the surface and the skeletal remains of an alligator next to it, cut in half. Halfling bones poked up out of the muck and grass and bushes around it and a half-dozen rivulets of water ran into or out of the pond; tall plants grew inside the water along its edge, but the middle just had strands of water-weed.
There was something magical at the bottom.
"Some treasure lies below the surface," I told her.
"Diving time!" she said before I could stop her. She dove down and the water churned. I GOT DRAGGED UNDER, SCREAMING.
Then we came up, now draped in pond weed and pond scum, with her clutching a brazier made of black metal, coated in ice, by its metal handles. She had it gripped in her powerful and now thirty-percent larger teeth.
ICE? In this weather?
Rainbow Dash passed it to me, then shook us dry and clean, forming a rainbow that arched right over me; she looked proud and I applauded. "This looks familiar," I said. It had carry handles that were not frozen but the rest of it... why ice? I held my hand near the main body of it; I felt it sucking at my body heat.
Then the bones started moving. "Undead!" I shouted.
We ZOOMED out of there instead of fighting them all and I decided I liked Rainbow Dash. Most heroic types would have stuck around to fight them all.
Screw that, you get the loot and RUN! Like a sensible person!
Maybe scouting isn't so bad.
**************
"You left an undead army wandering loose?" Twilight said, stunned.
"More like an undead company, really," Rainbow Dash said, clearly trying to use the 'Shift Blame' spell. One that all adventurers must learn.
"There was no way the two of us could have handled it," I said. "It was my decision," I lied. "She wanted to stay but I thought it best to withdraw and get reinforcements." Now she owes me. I'll take some heat for this, but nothing I can't overcome.
"Yeah, I was going to clobber them!," Rainbow Dash said boldly, miming punching skeletons out. "But I couldn't protect Marcus and fight them all at once."
"I... can't we just avoid them?" Fluttershy said. "We need to conserve our strength for the dr... dragon. And probably they just don't like strangers."
"They're probably going to hunt us down to try to get their brazier back; it probably *made* them," Applejack said. "What do you think, Twilight?"
Twilight and Spike were busy digging through books.
"I vote for avoiding them," Ivan said. "I'm with Fluttershy, save our strength for the dragon. But make sure that thing isn't evil." He eyed it suspiciously.
"I'm working on it," Twilight said. "Marcus, can you look through Krangon's?"
Krangon was a halfling adventurer from about fifty years ago; he visited the Malpheggi among other places and volume 4 of his memoirs deals with it. That's the one she brought. She tossed it to me and I started skimming.
Rainbow Dash lurked by me, reading over my shoulder. I moved a little to make it easier for her, though I was probably going to fast for her to keep up easily.
"Damn, you read fast," she said.
"I can't fly like you but I can turn pages with the best of them," I said dryly and she laughed.
"There we go," she said; I had nearly gone by a picture of the brazier but I guess she's used to processing visuals quickly if she can outrace sound.
Damn, I am so jealous of that!
"It's a crucible of Blackflame, a kind of fire which is cold," I said. "The Halflings use it for making magical items. Nothing here about it making or being used by undead. It says it comes from the Nightmare dimension." Everything is backwards in the Nightmare dimension; if we enter it, we go mad, but beings from there go mad in the face of our universe. Their fire is cold, their water is dry, and so on.
"So they probably stole it," Rainbow Dash said hesitantly.
"Given those were Halfling bones, it's likely something killed them and turned them into undead, but somehow the crucible got dumped in the pond," I said. "I don't know why they would have had a crucible with them, though; according to this, they're found usually in Halfling clanholds."
Of which I think there are roughly a hundred in the Shires and more elsewhere.
"Well, we can see about returning it to the Shires later," Twilight said. "Maybe I can get the ice off, see what clan it belongs to."
Of course the Ponies will want to return it to the original owners instead of selling it and splitting the wealth. Dammit, they're always so goody goody!
"Oh man," Ivan said. "That thing..."
I gave him the *hide what you are thinking* glare.
"Are you sure it won't kill us all?" Ivan asked nervously.
"It's perfectly safe as long as no one tries to put fuel in it or light it," Twilight said.
There was a deep and terrible silence.
I knew, in my gut, what was happening this very moment.
My head swiveled and found Pinkie trying to roast marshmallows over it.
Everyone stared in horror.
She laughed. "Psych! I didn't turn it on!"
We all fell over.
"I don't even know how to," Pinkie confessed. "But you should see the look on your faces!" She rolled around in the grass, laughing.
Then Rainbow Dash started laughing loudly. "Good one, Pinkie."
I snagged the brazier before something could happen like laughing turning it on.
Okay, it was kind of funny. I might have smiled just a little.
But dangerous. Who knows what kind of crazy stuff this thing may do. Time to read up on it.
*************
We picked our way forwards through the swamp, wading through knee-deep water and trying to arc off to the left of where the undead were. Rainbow Dash, now back to normal, and Fluttershy flew high to keep watch.
Ivan and Applejack spent the WHOLE TIME talking about farming. I knew he came from a farm family, but I thought the whole point of him leaving was to never touch wheat again. However, he and Applejack were discussing something called 'Three Sisters Agriculture', which was NOT some sort of sex position as you would think.
Apparently, it involves growing beans, corn and squash together, which strikes me as a good way to become very gaseous.
While they plotted to give us all gas, Twilight and I talked magic shop; it was a reminder of why I stayed in Canterlot long enough for everything to blow up in my face. Every so often, I noticed Spike glaring at me; I still don't know for sure why he's mad. None of the reasons could be good, though.
We were studying the Crucible of Blackflame, which made me nervous and interested at once. Spike was carrying it for us and a half-dozen books were floating in the air. "Okay, so each Halfling Clan has one of these, which means some clan either lost theirs or they all moved here and died," Twilight said, frowning at the idea.
"Or someone stole it," I said.
"All the undead are halflings," she pointed out. "Except for the alligator."
"Maybe halflings used to live here," Spike said. "Lots of fish, and they could make rice paddies easily." It's easy to forget Spike has a pretty good education, especially as he's still childish. But he's not stupid and he knows more than you'd think.
"This doesn't seem very ideal for their burrows," Twilight said, looking down at the knee-deep water. It was more like waist-deep on Spike.
"You think you could get Winona to actually put the fish in the ground without eating them?" Ivan said to Applejack, sounding surprised.
Who?
"Hmm, so you need something flammable to ignite it," I said, studying the layer of frost. "Which might be hard to do with the cold and the ice. Though I do have a fire spell which might do it."
"Ignatius' Igneous Ignition?" Twilight asked.
Rarity was busy talking to Pinky. Something about a cat. Or an alligator? Rarity was fretting over whether her sister was taking care of their pets. AHH. I'm sure Rarity's sister is reliable, though, if she's much like Rarity.
I remember the time Ivan, Helga, and I stupidly agreed to take care of that damn Flaemish wizard's familiar while he was in Parliament. The Glantrian Parliament, that is. Stupid Salamander.
By the way, flame spells make them STRONGER.
"Vanderhoven's Spiraling Fiery Burst," I told her. "I learned it from Pieter Vanderhoven, a Glantrian Wizard, after the HELL known as taking care of his familiar."
Spike is, I think, Twilight's familiar. "HEY," Spike said.
"Nothing personal, Spike. You're intelligent, you don't run around burning everything, and you don't keep trying to climb up the chimney," I told him apologetically. "It was a salamander."
Rarity and Pinkie now came up to us. "What's this?" Rarity asked.
I had to tell them the whole story. They were busy laughing at me, except for Applejack and Ivan, who were trying to figure out how many beans a human needed to eat.
If humans 'need' to eat beans, I am in trouble.
Rainbow Dash now dropped down from the sky and said, "We've got trouble. The Undead are following us."
Ivan grimaced. "They probably are tracking the Crucible."
"I'm thinking we should dump it, then," Applejack said.
DUMP TREASURE?
Even LOKI would never dump treasure. And he's an EVIL TRICKSY BASTARD.
So are his priests. They built a whole country around LYING. How Hule works, I'll never understand.
"Dump treasure? I'm pretty sure that's immoral in every religion," Ivan said frantically.
Agreed.
"We can't just throw away treasure," Rarity said firmly. "I am losing income every day my shop is closed. That thing has to be valuable to someone."
A woman after my own heart.
"Oooh, I bet I could make ice cream in it," Pinkie said.
I suspect it would be dangerous ice cream.
"It's too valuable to throw away," Twilight said. "And undead can't be bargained with." She sighed. "Not most undead, anyway. There was this one book..."
"About a lonely Boldavian prince of the night?" I said. No one has ever proven the rulers of Boldavia in Glantri are vampires. Just as no one has ever *proven* Celestia is a Pony and not someone engaged in a really, really thorough impersonation of a Pony. Or proven with irrefutable proof that I am human or Spike is a dragon or Twilight is a Pony.
Her eyes widened and lit up. "You read it?"
There are a ton of crappy books for people about romantic Boldavian vampires. I suspect someone in Prince Mikhail's family churns them out to raise money for fancy coffins for everyone.
"I wouldn't take those as truth," I told her, and her face crashed. "They're intended as entertainment."
She sighed.
"Anyway, this thing is too valuable to throw away and they might chase us anyway, given undead tend to want to eat tasty creatures like Ponies and Humans," I said.
"Actually, Ponies are MUCH tastier than Humans," Fluttershy said.
WHY DOES SHE KNOW THIS???
Spike raised an eyebrow at Fluttershy.
"But candy is TASTIER than either! If we make people out of candy, maybe they'll eat the candy people and leave us alone," Pinkie said hopefully, then began digging in her saddlebags.
"We haven't got the facilities to make candy, and I think they smell the living," Rarity said.
"I didn't bring any of my field guides to the undead, because I assumed we'd only meet swamp monsters and dragons," Twilight said, frustrated. "I need some spell I can pull books out of my library with."
"Can you send or receive books, Spike?" I asked him.
"No, too long," he said. "I could send someone a letter and ask them to go look in the library but by the time they find it, probably zombies will be trying to eat us." He studied me suspiciously.
Did I ask Spike about that in the old days? I racked my brain, trying to figure out if I had, but it's too much of a blur. I only remember the big events, like the time we were in the library so late the castle librarian fell asleep on on our books to make us leave.
Or maybe just fell asleep.
We'd been knee-deep in a discussion of ring theory. I don't remember why, so we went back to her chambers and continued the discussion until we both fell asleep on the floor.
Man, Spike makes good waffles.
"Waffles?" Twilight said.
FUCK ME. PLEASE LET ME ONLY HAVE SAID WAFFLES.
"Focus, sugarcube," Applejack said. "We need to decide what to do about the dead."
"I suggest we press on to something drier," I said. "Ivan and I can fight better if we aren't slogging through water."
"Me too," Applejack said. "Throws my speed and coordination off a mite."
"There's a rocky outcropping," Rainbow Dash said. "Up ahead. About a half mile."
"Is it dry?" Rarity asked.
"Yes."
We agreed to head for the outcropping. Rainbow Dash got Twilight to enlarge her again, then took me with her so we could make sure it didn't have any traps on it.
See, normal people don't have to worry if ordinary terrain features have traps, but in my line of work, EVERYTHING has traps in it.
Possibly even waffles.
Dammit, I want Spike to make me waffles now.
"Hey, thanks for covering for me earlier," Rainbow Dash said to me sheepishly.
"That's what friends are for, right?" I told her. You can't really call someone a friend you just met, but being SEEN as one is a very valuable tool.
She smiled brightly. "Yeah, exactly. Friends take care of each other. You're an alright guy, Samus Marcus. I was kind of worried about you, but I guess that Erik guy was an unusual bad apple." She laughed. "Geez, I sound like Applejack."
The wind battered at me; Rainbow Dash was flying at a good clip but not too fast, soaring over the trees. It was more fun and less terrifying this time, and I envied her. To fly whenever you want, that must be wonderful.
"It is wonderful," she said. "And, of course, I'm one of the greatest flyers in Equestria!" She demonstrated with a loop-de-loop which nearly flung me off into the swamp. "Ack, I'm not used to carrying anyone."
Only now did I realize I had voiced my thoughts AGAIN. If I am not careful, I am going to die.
"Humans can't fly unless they use magic," I told her. "Though there are some winged humans and elves in Alphatia." Though that might have been magic too. Alphatia is an ancient empire, thousands of years old, ruled by anyone who can spell-cast. Everyone else is a flunky at best. Glantri wants to be Alphatia, but is basically a cheap rip-off.
"You do magic... I guess you don't have a horn, though," she said thoughtfully.
"It's the fruit of hard study. I EARNED my magic," I said. "I taught myself from a book I got on an adventure." I later found out it was one of the introductory books from the Great School of Magic.
Okay, I bought it because it had a mostly naked Elf on the cover. I was sixteen, okay?
Why Glantrians had mostly naked Elves on the cover of a school textbook, I don't know. It certainly is an inducement to study magic.
"I went to the flight academy in Cloudsdale," she said. "I don't know if you've heard of it," she continued hesitantly, glancing back at me.
"Cloud city, center for weather production, right?" I said. Equestria, like Alfheim and parts of Alphatia and Glantri, has managed weather. The Pegasi Ponies fly around, controlling it. They all have a knack, but some are better than others.
"Yeah, I'm a weather pony. And I won an award for best Junior Flyer!" she said proudly. "I got to save the Wonderbolts and now I'm pals with them!" She sounded really excited about that.
We now reached the outcropping. It looked rather odd, a mix of grey and black rocks all jumbled together and fused into huge chunks, rising out of the swamp. The land rose north of it to where the water was just ankle-deep and on the west side of it, a stream flowed south. Hardy berry bushes and moss grew on it but no grass. The fire-blackened skull of a dragon of middling age sat on the south face of it, halfway down the slope and a few other dragon bones stuck out of the rocks.
"Look, you're a guy, right?" Rainbow Dash said nervously. ...
"You saw me naked," I said. And commented on my genitalia. Actually, let's forget that ever happened too.
"I'm sorry, I am trying to figure out how to ask this. It's just, I kind of don't have a lot of guy friends," she said nervously.
Whatever she's going to ask me, it's going to be bad. I can SMELL it. "If this is about male Ponies, I can try to help, but I know more about male humans," I told her. I now began casting a spell to hopefully find any magical energies.
She circled the outcropping as I did this. I noticed a long flow of fused rock down the east side. Surely this isn't some kind of volcano. There's no feeling of heat from it. And it's too small, I think.
"Well, I...umm... I think there's enough similarity. This isn't about anatomy," Rainbow Dash said. "From the stories I've heard, Humans and Ponies... they...umm... Has a girl ever made you a pie?" she said frantically.
What?
"I have been fortunate enough to eat food made for me by many ladies," I told her. "Did you make someone you like a pie and you can't judge his reaction to it?"
"What, no, this is just totally theoretical," she said. LYING LIKE A RUG. "If, by chance, a girl made a guy a pie and he got sick but said it was okay... would it mean he was just being polite and now hates her forever?" she asked nervously.
Wow, this is a flashback to when I was eleven or so. But I suppressed the urge to laugh. Never mock people who you want to get on their good side unless they clearly like teasing.
"Is he the honest, athletic, rugged type like you?" I asked.
"Yes," she said nervously.
No sign of magical traps on the hill, thank you, but now I was nervous it might erupt. I don't have any spells for that, thanks to my usual inability to hold onto ritual books for long.
"It means he really does like you," I told her. "But next time, maybe you should get Pinkie to help you."
"I wanted to make it myself," she mumbled.
"But any true man knows that if a woman makes him food, she likes him." I paused. "Unless she's a baker like Pinkie, anyway."
She relaxed. "But this isn't about me," she then said, un-relaxing, and waving her forelimbs frantically.
"Try touching down on it," I told her. "You can tell your 'friend' that the guy likes her," I said kindly.
She landed lightly on top. A rock shifted but her footing was steady. Good visibility from here, lots of places to hide. So what horrible deadly doom am I not seeing?
"I'll try making another pie after this," she said. "I mean...umm..."
"I am sure he will enjoy the pie," I told her, hoping I wasn't sending her down a blind alley. But I'll be long gone before she tries making him another pie. I wonder which one of the Wonderbolts it is. Not that I know much about them beyond their appearance and some of their... "Oh, you know the Wonderbolts, right? Did they ever tell you about their adventure recovering an artifact for the Minrothad Guilds?"
"Those Guilders are ASSHOLES. Greedy, greedy, greedy," she said, spitting on a rock. "But you're not like that, thankfully."
"Aren't there ponies in the Guilds?" I asked.
"CRAZY ponies who think bits are the only things which matters," Rainbow Dash said, shaking her head. Bits are what Equestrians call gold pieces. "Even Applejack and Rarity don't think that."
The Minrothad Guilds control islands off southeast of here, beyond Ierendi. They're major sea traders and compete with Thyatis to control the sea trade. For understandable reasons, they don't like me very much, though I don't THINK they've figured out everyone they hate is the same person. I'm kind of under a few Black Marks, where they are out to kill me but they can't FIND me in this body. Hah!
Twitch.
Anyway, the Pearl was IVAN'S fault, not mine. I only helped.
Anyway, the Islands are home to all five sentient races, who work together in remarkable harmony to get everyone else in the multiverse's gold, by trade, theft, piracy, stealing intellectual property and so on.
If they weren't so greedy, they'd be kind of inspirational, really. Hard working, racial cooperation, no internal wars... but totally greedy.
"This seems like a good place to make a stand, but I feel like I'm missing something," I told Rainbow Dash.
"It looks fine to me," she said. "As long as we don't have to sleep on it."
You know, I can use my new sweater vest as a pillow. That would be nice. It's nice and soft. "Okay, let's get the others, then."
"So do you know this Erik guy who Twilight had her trouble with?" she asked me as she took off.
"Not any more than you know every pony in Equestria," I lied smoothly. "I don't even know what exactly happened beyond people saying she was moping."
"No one knows, beyond him running away and some kind of drinking game with books and... what kind of drinking game involves BOOKS?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Even Berry doesn't know any book drinking games."
I know far too much about exactly what kind of drinking game involves books. Twilight, in fact, had a book of drinking games for book lovers.
Of course.
"I'd be afraid to ruin the book spilling something on it," I told her.
"I kind of got rainbow all over a textbook one time," Dash said ruefully.
Well, I can say I NEVER have done that.
And hopefully never will.
"He probably was from the Northern Reaches with a name like that," I told her. I was claiming to be a Vestlander at that point but it would give up too much if I somehow 'guessed' that.
"Do they break women's hearts a lot up there?" she asked.
"They do in Ostland," I said. "They're all crazy raiding maniacs there." And the women are hot but insane. Anyway, Ostland has earned my wrath, so I don't mind dumping on them.
She grimaced. "That explains that."
"You really care about Twilight," I said softly.
"Yeah, we're pals. I'd do anything for a pal," she said. "But I'll have to save flying to Ostland and kicking his ass for later."
"Better not go alone; they're pretty tough," I told her. I just need to deflect suspicion from myself, not get her killed trying to hunt someone imaginary.
"Well, right now, we have to focus on this," she said. "You holding up okay?" she asked softly.
Why... OH. "Having something else to focus on lets me get by," I told her.
She nodded. "Yeah. It does." She didn't volunteer what she might want to get by from and I didn't pry.
You know, Ivan and I could finally get into that damn tower with the help of someone like her. Assuming the map isn't full of TOO many lies.
And assuming we still had the map, but I THINK I remember where that tower in the Broken Lands is.
She could just fly around until we found it!
This would, however, get in the way of running for the hills. Though if this DOES end smoothly... Well, I'll contemplate that later.
Especially since I know better than to think dealing with a Great Wyrm EVER goes smoothly.
***************
Rainbow Dash left me there to secure the position. This made me VERY nervous, but I only had to kill a single snake which popped out and tried to kill me for no good reason. I was busy hunting for more snakes when the others arrived, splashing through the water.
Rarity paused, then stared at the rocks. I blinked, following her gaze.
"Oooh, did you find gems?" Spike asked, drooling a little.
"There's LOTS of gems in these rocks," Rarity said. She concentrated and various points began to glow, especially along the fused rock on the east side.
"We can dig for gems later, once the undead are gone," Applejack said. "So hold your horses, Spike."
"Oh man!"
I nodded. "I'll help you dig them up, Rarity."
Spike glared super-death at me. Why does he care if I help dig up gems? I know he likes to eat them but surely he isn't going to eat them all. "I can handle it," he said.
"We'll all help," Twilight said. "Maybe we can use these to bribe the Dragon."
"Hmm, good idea," Ivan said, nodding.
We disposed our force along the south and east slope, hoping the river would shield our western flank. Twilight and Rarity took up positions near the peak with Fluttershy over them. Rainbow Dash, Pinkie, and I were on the south slope, Ivan and Applejack on the east. Spike stood at the very corner. Fluttershy now began to sing and scatter seeds and they began to grow up into brambles around our three open sides. GO DRUID!
Twilight began reading from a book, tendrils of magic reaching around the rocks and Rarity now concentrated; a dozen finely crafted arrows rose out of her right saddlebag, each with an engraved head with her Cutie Mark set into it in blue-gem slices. The shafts were smooth oak and the feathers were bright and colorful and carefully cut to match each other for balance. "Wow," I said. They were the most beautiful arrows I have ever seen.
"I will act as the last line of defense for Twilight, but until then, I can support with arrows," Rarity said. "And Fluttershy and I support each other."
Hmm, interesting, I wonder how. I peered off through the steamy wetlands towards where the undead would appear, getting ready to cast.
When I saw them, I opened up with pyrotechnics to mark their position. I can't make very huge ones, unfortunately, but it was enough to give the signal for everyone else to FIRE.
Twilight did a set of signs with her hooves and finished her spell. The ground cracked and black tendrils thrust up, grabbing some of the halfling zombies and beginning to crush them. She looked pleased and determined. Evard's Black Tentacles. He was a Svart-Alfen from the Northern Reaches, I think.
Ivan and Applejack and Spike all held their ground for now, waiting for the enemy to get within range. Rainbow Dash hovered; she clearly wanted to go HIT HIT HIT but Twilight had told her to hold her ground.
Pinkie... began a fan dance. She's remarkably nimble on only two legs and she began singing a song about laughing at ghosts and facing your fears. Somehow, it eased my fears about facing these creatures. I feel strange without fear, like something is missing. I could see the others relax, too. Bards are pretty nice and for all that Pinkie is crazy, she's good at her job.
Rarity studied the onrushing hordes; there were dozens of halfling zombies and skeletons, a skeletal alligator with two independently moving halves, a dozen or so spectral halflings and one shambling corpse limned with blackflame. Unfortunately, Twilight's tentacles had mainly grabbed the slow moving, easy to grab halflings.
"Don't touch the spectral ones with your flesh," Twilight said, pointing them out. "Rarity, if you can hurt them, focus fire on them, because Dash and Applejack and Pinkie can't fight them safely. Marcus, Ivan, your swords can hurt them, right?"
Great, just because I have a magical sword, I GET TO FIGHT THE LIFE FORCE SUCKING UNDEAD. This is the story of my life.
I might have just panicked, but I couldn't run with Pinkie singing. It was too soothing.
Now I know what I will hear when I die.
Rarity concentrated, arrow flickering back and forth as she aimed it with precision. Then she pushed it mentally and it flew with grace and beauty into the left breast of one of the spectral figures and stuck, hovering there. It howled and swatted at it, but it stayed stuck and now Fluttershy began to sing and branches sprouted from the shaft, wrapping around and trapping the creature. Not bad at all.
The lead elements of the wave now hit the massive brambles, and pressed on, getting tangled and trapped, moving very slowly.
Meanwhile, I concentrated and waved my hands, speaking the words of Vanderhoven's Spiraling Fiery Burst. A mote of flame erupted from my hand and began arcing towards one of the spectral halflings. It stared at it and now the flame spiraled in and hit it, then exploded in an outrushing burst of spiral flame which rushed over three of the spectral halflings and some zombies and skeletons as well; the zombies began to burn and the spectral halflings howled. But then the blackflame limned creature just sucked up my flames and his black flame got bigger.
DAMMIT.
At least their injuries stayed.
"Dash, get up and make sure there aren't some coming from a surprise direction," Twilight said, then began another spell.
Dash took to the skies and I began trying to think of something else I could do before it was melee time. My fire spell is my only memorized spell that kills things. I'm not telekinetically strong enough to fling them and my pyrotechnics would probably just annoy them. I doubt they like card tricks either.
Rarity and Fluttershy took down another spectral halfling together, but now the rest were coming through the brambles, faster than the zombies and skeletons, who got stuck in the brambles. But the spectral halflings just floated through the brambles like they weren't there.
"I don't see any more of them," Dash shouted from above.
Applejack now tried kicking apples at the spectral halflings. The apples went right through them, but now they turned and chased the apples. ...
Pinkie paused in her song and dance long enough to tell me, "Ivan, Marcus, I have PIES in my pack."
We dug around in her saddlebags, which she shucked off. They were HUGE inside. I'm going to have to digress.
Every race EXCEPT humans have signature magical items. I'm not sure whether we couldn't make up our minds or what. Elves, for example, have their magical swords, magical boots for stealth, and magical cloaks for stealth. Halflings craft weapons out of blackflame, such as rods of justice, which paralyze on a touch. They also make this GREAT potion called Oil of Moonlight, which makes things fly when you anoint them with it. Dwarfs make magical weapons and armor and these vessels called rockships, which sail through solid earth. I've ridden in one and it's a really smooth, quiet ride and very convenient.
For Ponies, one of their signature magical items are saddlebags of holding, magical bags which hold about a ten foot cube worth of space in each bag while being fairly small on the outside and toning down the weight of what you put in them. The result is that Ponies can carry a ton of stuff with them and just about everypony has one of these. Best of all, you just stick your hand in and think about what you need and you can reach it.
So Ivan and I armed ourselves with pies and started throwing. The spectral halflings began chasing them and eating them. Applejack and Rainbow Dash began laughing and laughing. Meanwhile, Rarity and Fluttershy began picking them off.
The boss, however, was not distracted by food and he now lashed out with huge tendrils of blackflame at us as we fed his minions. Everyone had to jump everywhere and then Twilight lightning bolted him. Which he absorbed and got MORE POWER.
I HATE FOES LIKE THAT.
Then he started to make a beeline for Spike.
Spike shivered, then got a determined look. "I won't let you hurt my friends!" He let out a huge gout of flame. Which, of course, the guy sucked up.
"Ivan, it's up to us," I told him. DAMMIT, I DO NOT WANT TO GO HAND TO HAND WITH THIS GUY.
Quickly, I donned my sweater vest, while Ivan said, "Do we have to?"
"If the ponies try to fight him hand-to-hand, it will probably eat their life force," I told Ivan.
"IT WILL TRY TO EAT OUR LIFE FORCE," Ivan said.
See, here's the problem. I agree with him totally. But if we don't do it, it will kill everyone else, then chase us through the swamp ANYWAY, THEN kill us.
"I'll do it, Marcus, while Nervous Nellie here hides behind Spike," Applejack said, now digging in her pack. She quickly removed and donned... galoshes?
Maybe they're Galoshes of Slaying or something.
"Fine! I'll do it!" Ivan said, charging. Ivan, foolishly can't handle being called a coward.
He does things to look brave.
I am a coward, but sometimes I have to fake bravery when I know cowardice won't actually work.
Seeing that thing closing in on Ivan, tendrils of blackflame lashing about, made me want to piss myself. I was utterly terrified of it. But seeing Ivan charging, I circled left, and Applejack right. It lashed out at me, but I parried with my blade and cut the tendril off. It regenerated but I now moved with Applejack to flank our foe. As he and Ivan flailed at each other and Ivan's blade began to grow a layer of ice, I would dart in and stab him, then parry or duck under or jump over his lashing tendrils, while Applejack did the same, delivering kicks with her now galoshes-shielded hooves. Ice formed on the surface of the galoshes, but her hooves were warm inside.
I could hear Rainbow Dash now charging through ranks of skeletons, smashing them up and flying, and now Pinkie Pie was singing about the hip bone connects to the skull bone, which I will note is TOTALLY wrong, for human OR pony.
I saw Spike set one of the spectral halflings on fire as he tried to climb the hill and then Rarity nailed the specter in the head with one of her arrows and it dissipated. Spike gave a huge cheer. "GO RARITY!"
"SUDDEN DAWN!" Twilight shouted, and sunlight, pure sunlight, washed over the zombies, searing them.
I got lashed by our foe, but it enabled Applejack to do a double kick that knocked him down. I had ice across my chest but the sweater vest kept me warm. Thanks, Twilight, Rarity! HAH!
The three of us hit him wolf-pack style; if he turned to face one of us, the other two would nail him. Applejack could kick him so hard he often fell down. He was starting to get very angry.
Angry enough that he now bowled Ivan over with an all out attack, leaving Ivan crusted in ice and howling, though Ivan gave him a nasty cut down one side which slowly was burning with REAL fire.
Then he rushed towards Spike.
This posed a problem. Without his fire, Spike can't stop this thing AND it likely WANTS more of his fire to get stronger. But if Spike gets out of the way, there's nothing to stop him attacking Twilight and Rarity or getting the Crucible, which would probably make him unstoppable.
"Spike, if you breathe on it, it gets stronger!," I shouted as Applejack and I chased it.
Fluttershy called up a wall of brambles, but he just froze and burned them at the same time, and she stared in horror as he kept coming.
Rarity shot him in the chest, then hit him with two more arrows and he lashed out with long tendrils at her and Spike. Spike bravely interposed himself to protect Rarity, ended up coated in ice and fell down. Rarity's eyes glinted now with anger.
"SPIKE!" Twilight shouted. Her horn glowed brightly.
Oh shit, here comes everyone becoming a turnip.
Pinkie Pie grabbed Spike and dove out of the way.
Rainbow Dash climbed upwards in a long arc.
Rarity pulled the arrows out of him and now all her arrows flew around her in an angry storm, building up speed. But now a tendril came lashing for her.
The river rose up and a lash of water hit the attacking lash and the water became ice and rained down, but now our foe was thrown off enough for Applejack to catch up with him, kicking him down.
"Don't you dare attack Spike and Rarity!" I shouted, stabbing him in a way that would have killed an ordinary person. "They're my friends!" Given he was an undead horror made out of undead blackflame (or whatever he is), it just hurt him and ice rushed up my blade, which now was stuck.
Well, shit.
Stupidly, I tried to stand on his back and pull it out and my boot froze to him. OH FUCK ME.
Rarity's breath caught and Spike said something weakly through the ice around him. Pinkie took a cake knife from her bags and began gently jabbing the ice, cutting Spike loose. Two of Rarity's arrows began ice-pick style assistance.
Dash continued to zoom around, beating up the skeletons and zombies, since everyone else was too distracted to even pay attention to them. She could pretty much kill any skeleton by ramming it, hooves first, and the zombies fell down when she hit them.
Ivan struggled, trying to get loose, his sword fallen on the ground out of his reach.
Applejack now secured her legs around my waist and pulled as I pulled but this just pulled me and our foe back and then we all rolled and ended up more or less back how we started, except I was getting more cold and more weak and our foe had a bigger hole in him.
I will note her galoshes DID NOT FREEZE. For some reason.
Fluttershy looked at me, looked at my sword, then smiled.
I don't get it.
She flew in close and began chanting gently. The ice on my sword melted and now it glowed hotly and I began stabbing our foe while Applejack pinned him down.
"You'd better surrender or it's the graveyard for you!" Applejack said.
I tried to figure out why Druid heat didn't feed him and Arcane fire HAD. Not that I was one to argue with success.
Fluttershy now helped Ivan, while Applejack and I dealt with our foe, the blackflame monster. Rarity shot him with several of her arrows and Applejack stomped him. I still had my feet frozen to him; they were leather and I guess druids don't spend much time learning to heat leather. Heating METAL is a classic Druid trick.
Usually for roasting their foes alive in their armor and weapons, but I assume Fluttershy doesn't go for that.
Hmm, you know, I bet she could make an AWESOME kebab.
I could now see Pinkie had produced a giant fake human hand... why did Pinkie have a giant fake human hand??? It was like a glove over her hoof and she was now using it to do a dance. The surviving zombies were now following her, copying her every motion. Okay, that's a pretty nice Bard trick, I have to say. She was leading them over to the river.
Ivan got the killing shot on the blackflame monster, with Rarity, Applejack, and myself providing support. Fluttershy had joined Pinkie and was singing while Pinkie danced. Pinkie led the zombies into the water; she had enough mass to resist the current, but they did not and it washed them away.
"Well, I guess that's done," I said.
Then one of the spectral halflings, which we'd all lost track of, suddenly came up OUT OF THE GROUND and grabbed the Crucible of Blackflame. Twilight hit him with lightning, Rarity with an arrow, Spike with a wobbly thrown rock, and he died.
"Okay, now we're done," I said.
"There's a flying boat coming this way!" Rainbow Dash said.
I rubbed my forehead; I could see a huge flying ship off in the distance now that Dash pointed it out. Too far to see if it is friendly or hostile, though.
I helped Ivan hobble back to the rock outcropping and Fluttershy began treating our injuries, with Rarity and Applejack for nurses. Spike got out a piece of paper and a quill, then got on Rainbow Dash and flew up with her, to go scout the ship. I assume he plans to send Twilight a letter if necessary.
"Fluttershy, do you know why your abilities could hurt it without making it stronger when Spike's fire and my fire and Twilight's magic couldn't?" I asked her.
"He was mean and I am not," she said.
I am not MEAN. Twilight is not mean. Spike... isn't usually mean, other than hating me.
"Fluttershy, Marcus and Twilight and Spike are not mean," Rarity said, gently chiding.
"I'm so sorry," Fluttershy squeaked, dropping the cloth she had in her mouth, with which she was applying some kind of salve to Ivan's chilled chest. "I... Ivan."
"What about you and the Salamander?" Ivan said to me, grinning a little. "Yes, Fluttershy?"
"The Salamander had it coming," I grumbled.
Rarity laughed softly and said, "You will need to take your boots and pants off, if that's okay, Marcus."
I did so and she worked on me. My poor cold feet soon felt a nice warmth soaking into them.
"She... said, yes," Fluttershy mumbled.
"I don't understand," Ivan said.
"She needs you to strip some in order to treat you."
He began doing so.
"See, he's not panicky about it," Applejack said to me. "Ain't no big deal, a little nudity between friends."
It's not so much the nudity as the surprise and the fact that when someone surprises me when I'm naked, they usually are out to kick my ass. And I was TRYING to speak secret things with Ivan.
Pinkie rose up onto her hind hooves. I think she must have a little human in her ancestry or something. "We're all born naked," she sang. "And naked into the grave we go!"
"Actually, humans are usually buried with clothing on," I said as Rarity now worked on my chest.
"Oh COME ON," Applejack said. "In case of what? The worms seeing you nekkid?" She reared up. "I'm naked and what does it matter? Nothing."
"No one is really naked with a hat on," I said. My tombstone will probably say that. I shivered as Rarity worked on my legs, then remembered my tattoo was just covered by my underwear now and if that got out... I really shivered now.
"I am going to teach you not to be silly about your body," Applejack said to me.
"Applejack, you should respect their customs," Rarity said firmly.
"It's stupidly finicky and gets in the way of way too much," Applejack said. "What are you going to do if your butt gets injured, Marcus?"
"Cry," I mumbled, and she rolled her eyes.
Rarity sighed. "I'm sorry, Marcus, sometimes Applejack carries on like she lives in a barn."
"I HAVE A BARN, you know," Applejack said, irritated. "I LIVE in it."
"Really, it's more like a house than a barn," Fluttershy said; I could tell she was really uncomfortable with this argument.
Twilight was watching us work but also consulting three books hastily.
"We can't bump, if you won't show your rump!," Pinkie sang, dancing along.
Please tell me she is NOT singing about what I think she's singing about.
Fluttershy's eyes crossed.
"You live in your shop and I live in MINE," Applejack said, frowning. "You picking up bad manners from your sewing machine and your thread?"
"Your manners seem fine to me," Ivan said. "Fluttershy, are you okay?"
"I'm okay," she squeaked, then took a deep breath. "Ivan, I'm done. We can put your shirt back on and then you should rest a little while, then you'll be okay."
"Thank you," he said. "I feel much better."
Rarity and Applejack were trying to kill each other with their eyes. "My legs," I mumbled and Rarity looked embarrassed and went back to work treating them.
"You got perfectly nice legs for a human," Applejack said, then for some reason ran a hoof along my calf. "Nice muscle definition there. You do much runnin'?"
A lot. A whole lot.
"Humans are intended as long-distance runners," Fluttershy said. "Ponies are faster over short distances but we tire out quickly. Humans can chase things for miles if they're in good shape. It's how they hunt."
"We should go runnin' some time, then. I'd like to see how fast you are," Applejack said, clearly giving Rarity the 'Wall of Ignoring' spell.
"Sure," I said. I'll be long gone by then, assuming she isn't planning to run in the swamp.
Please not in the swamp.
Rarity finished with the warming salve. Oh yes, feels good. I made happy noises and she smiled. "You can put your pants on."
Twilight was now urgently whispering to Pinkie, who looked baffled.
I put my pants on. "Thank you very much, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack."
"I mostly just stood here waiting my turn, sugarcube," Applejack said. "But yer welcome, Marcus."
"I like to help people," Fluttershy said, smiling brightly.
"I shouldn't eat up our limited food but now I'm hungry," I grumbled.
"We can go catch you more fish," Applejack said. "If we're lucky, we'll get some here."
We now got down to getting Applejack treated as well.
*************
Once Applejack was treated, which Ivan helped with, we all went fishing, though Twilight and Pinkie were still talking. Rarity is a pretty good spear fisher with those arrows, I learned. She and Applejack both relaxed while we were fishing. I was in the middle of frying up the fish when it hit me. "Should Dash be taking this long?"
The ship was drawing closer and there was no sign of Rainbow Dash.
Applejack frowned. "I wouldn't think it would."
There had been no sounds of violence or anything, though.
The ship was coming from north by northeast. "It's coming from Darokin or Glantri or maybe even Wendar."
"Assumin' it came in a straight line," Applejack pointed out.
Good point.
A letter now tumbled down to Twilight. We all looked over, curious.
"Dear Twilight Sparkle," she read out loud. "Duchess Sapphire of Sugar Hollow is here, on her way to make a visit of state to Equestria on behalf of Princess Emerald of the Principality of Dream Valley in the Republic of Glantri. She actually wears more clothing than Marcus and Ivan." ...
Ivan laughed. "Now that would be something to see."
Applejack laughed loudly.
"Also, no one needs three tiaras. She wants to see Duchess Twilight Sparkle." Twilight blinked. "I am not a duchess."
"You are now," I said. "Clearly Rainbow Dash wanted her to see you as an equal, rather than some peasant to be pitied and trampled on. Or maybe Spike. If she's like most Glantrian nobles, she has an ego bigger than an Ursa Major."
They all shivered at that, as I knew they would. Star beasts are terribly dangerous things.
"I don't know if we really have time," Twilight said nervously.
"Everyone did bring their formal clothes, right?" Rarity said. "I have mine."
They brought formal clothing to a swamp?
"The only thing I have which is clean, let alone formal, is this sweater vest," I said. "Ditto for Ivan."
Twilight frowned. "I'm certainly not going to leave you behind."
"I got mine, if I have to dress up," Applejack said.
"If you enjoy waves of disdain, then you could go without dressing up," I said. "Duchesses are the next best thing to a Princess. She's probably second in command after Princess Emerald and probably her heir." There are... eleven? Twelve? There is a small number of Princes of Glantri, a slightly smaller number of Dukes and Duchesses, then various other ranks. Usually a Duke or Archduke (higher than Duke, even rarer) is the designated heir of the Prince or Princess.
Applejack grimaced. "Stupid snooty nobles."
"I don't know how we'd go about getting cleaned up here to the right level, though," I said. "And Ivan and I are kind of trashed."
"I'll stay here with you two," Applejack said. "Twilight, you can take Rarity and Fluttershy. They'll come off well. And Pinkie can stay with us."
Ivan pulled out a deck of cards. "I've got the party right here."
"I... is that really okay with you all?" Twilight said hesitantly. "I should meet with her, but I hate leaving you here."
"We'll have a little party," Applejack said. "I have some apple cider and everything."
"I've got pie!" Pinkie said cheerfully.
"We're too filthy to go," I said.
"We could... but you..." Rarity sighed. "I didn't bring much material, as I only expected to make repairs on the fancy clothing if something went wrong."
"It's fine," I told her. "I can help you dress up if you like, fair lady."
"It figures," Applejack said. "Better be careful or he'll have you clothed all the time, Rarity."
Everyone laughed.
I don't know how non-unicorns get these fancy outfits on. Rarity could have done this all herself, really, but I could tell she enjoyed having someone help her. Twilight helped Fluttershy to suit up. I have to say, I thought the three dresses looked pretty nice, though I think Rarity tends to go a little overboard on using gemstones.
Which reminded me, we haven't dug up the gems in this hill yet!
Well, later. We can worry about it later, they're not going anywhere.
"Thank you for the help," Rarity said. "I am sorry I haven't got anything appropriate to dress you up in and no way to make a full outfit suitable for a human." She sounded very guilty.
"It's fine," I told her. "I know you would if you could. After all this is done, I will need some fine clothing."
"I will be happy to help you then," she said, then joined the others. Then Twilight Sparkle teleported them up to the boat, which now was hovering over us.
SHADE! SWEET!
By now, Ivan and Applejack and Pinkie had our improvised party set up.
I eyed the cider warily. I wanted it but I needed to stay SOBER so nothing foolish would happen and why is Pinkie looking at me like that? I shivered.
"It doesn't bite," she whispered loudly to me.
Thanks for the heads up, Pinkie.
Applejack produced mugs and straws and we all got some cider and started playing. I could have easily rooked them all, but this is just for fun and to build stronger bonds with the rest of the party. So I carefully won some hands, but didn't really show off.
Applejack played conservatively, not winning big but never losing big either. She was very good at seeing through bluffs, I noted. Pinkie... I will not pretend I understand her goals. She either won big or went down in flames. Ivan takes moderate risks. He had some big wins, some bombs, but neither as big as Pinkie.
"So Ivan's a farm boy, what's your background?" Applejack asked, sipping through a straw.
"I was the seventh son, wouldn't inherit anything, so I got a sword and training in using it and a kind of hint to seek my fortune," I told her. I actually... dammit, I've lied about my childhood so many times I'm not sure any more which story is the right one. "I went to Karameikos to stay with kin who had immigrated there, which is when I met Ivan." I'm pretty sure the Anya and Boris thing happened. Maybe that was in Karameikos; those really aren't Thyatian names.
Every so often, I have these dreams where I grew up in a tree city, but I'm pretty sure that's my imagination.
Why is Pinkie looking at me like that???
"Seventh son of a seventh son?" she asked.
"Yes," I said.
"Ahh," she said sagely.
What?
I studied my hand. Jack of Flames, Ten of Shadows, Queen of Winds, Six of Stones, Jack of Shadows. I could go for a Straight, or throw most of them and stick with the pair of Jacks. Jack-high is my favorite way to win but it's hard to pull off.
"We've been in a lot of adventuring parties, along with Ivan's cousin Helga, but now she's married to a Glantrian noble and doing well," I told her. "I was sorry to see her retire, but I hope she's happy."
I decided to go for the Straight, hoping I wasn't messing up. Goodbye, two cards.
"You two met on some secret mission you can't talk about, right?" I said.
Pinkie and Applejack looked at each other. "I reckon it wouldn't do no harm to...," Applejack said, studying her cards.
"SECRET," Pinkie said urgently. "We can't tell you. I'm sorry, Sammy."
"My name is Marcus," I mumbled, then said louder, "Okay."
Pinkie discarded three Flames. "This hand is NOT on fire," she said, and Ivan laughed. I smiled.
Applejack sighed. "I hate secrets."
"Well, it's best to keep them," I said. "There's a lot of lunatics who run around stealing artifacts and they might cause you trouble if the full story came out." Not that I know anyone like that, of course.
Applejack tossed out two cards and took a deep sip of cider. "So you're a city boy?"
"Very much so," I told her. "Though I spend a lot of time in the country, getting in trouble."
Ivan dealt everyone more cards. I studied mine. Eight of Flames, Nine of Shadows. YES! I tried not to grin too much.
"So you like the sophisticated city types?" she asked.
"Yes," I told her. Didn't we already have this conversation? "But I enjoy the company of all of you here." Okay, Pinkie terrifies me just by looking at her cards. But other than that, they're good company. I sipped the cider. "Very good. I assume you brewed it yourself?"
"Big Mac handles all the distillin'," Applejack said. "He's my big brother."
"He's BIG," Pinkie said, spreading her forehooves wide. "And very Macky."
Whatever that means.
"You can commend him on his fine skills," I said. "Does he add honey?"
She blinked. "Yes, just a little for sweetness," she said.
"I bet Ponies make some fine mead," Ivan said.
"Shouldn't someone be betting?" Pinkie said.
"Sorry, I raise twenty," I said, shoving the coins out.
"See and raise five," Applejack said, pushing her coins out.
Pinkie turned her cards upside down. "Still the same, blast it!" She took a swig of cider.
"I guess you're missing the noble party on the boat, then," Applejack said. Something odd about her tone. Was she making fun of me? No. She wasn't mad at me, but...
Aargh, this is probably important.
Ivan frowned at his cards. "Fold," he said, sighing.
"I haven't bet yet!" Pinkie said.
"Fold anyway," Ivan said.
"I will admit that I do enjoy high class affairs, but I also enjoy a good game of cards with friends," I told her. "I'm actually more worried something will eat us." I did NOT mean to say that!
"You are a nervous nellie," Applejack said. "Why do you do it?"
Pinkie finally saw and raised two.
I saw her bet and raised five.
Applejack studied me, then her cards.
"There's no reason to be scared of cards," I said hesitantly.
"..." Applejack stared at me, confused.
"She means why go adventuring if you get scared so much," Ivan said. "Dumbass." He sipped his cider. "Man, I could totally go for some nice warm rye bread with butter and jam."
"Me too, but I can't bake anything out here very well," Pinkie said, sighing. "I put JUST a touch of sugar in it."
"You put sugar in everything, Pinkie," Applejack said. "And yeah, Ivan got it right." She frowned at her cards, then studied my forehead. Is she reading... no, Applejack would never invade my mind, find out my secrets, then reveal herself to be a vampire.
History doesn't repeat itself that precisely.
Pinkie said, "You need to bet, Applejack."
She looked up at the flying boat and sighed. Had she wanted to go? Maybe she was the sort of person who fakes reluctance and has to be pushed into what they want.
No, I don't think so. But there is something.
"I see but don't raise," Applejack finally said.
"I raise five," Pinkie said.
Pinkie was betting in an oddly moderate way, which meant... anything. It could mean ANYTHING. Dammit.
My eyes drifted to Applejack's hat. Such a nice hat but I doubt she'll put it up for a bet.
Dammit, I need a hat.
"You gonna answer?" Applejack asked me.
"Answer? OH," I said. "It's the only life I know," I told her. "Every time I try to settle down, something goes wrong. People die, things explode, I have to flee." I sighed. "Am I really that nervous?"
"No," Pinkie said.
"Yes," Ivan said, grinning. BASTARD.
"Yes," Applejack said. "I can see you're always eyin' the exits, so to speak." She took a sip of cider. "You have a bad experience with a pony or something?"
Well, there was having a pony JUMP ON ME as I clung to a tree branch in a raging river. Who thought it was a game. And who basically brings me fear just by... holding her cards sideways.
"In the adventuring business, caution helps you survive," I said. "I think you saw during the big fight that I am not going to run away, scared as I may get sometimes." I felt offended, really. When I run away, it won't be fear, it will be my survival instinct. Eventually, sooner or later, Twilight will figure out who I am and then I will be lucky to be a bottle stopper
"Damn life-drinking undead," Ivan grumbled.
We could hear music on the boat, pleasant tunes from the seventh century in Thyatis. The kind of thing they play at fancy parties in noble courts. Mind you, in the seventh century, it was peasant music and someone probably used a fiddle in it.
Age often gives things an unearned patina of classiness and glory.
Pinkie began tapping her feet and looked up jealously at the boat.
"I could tell you and Ivan fight together a lot," Applejack said. "Kinda like wolves fight."
"Yeah," Ivan said.
"Oh, I raise five," I said, studying my cards; now I was tapping my foot.
Applejack said. "Stay."
Pinkie shuffled her cards, then picked them up, looked at them hopefully and her face fell.
"You do those fancy dances?" Applejack asked me.
"I am versed in many styles of dance," I told her. "I can even sort of do the Pony Square, but with only two legs, I can't do it fully correctly."
Applejack sipped her cider. "You ever met Prince Blueblood?"
"I must admit I don't even know who he is," I said. Maybe I've heard the name.
"I...aaargh. FOLD," Pinkie said to my surprise. "Prince Blueblood is a meanie."
"What, now?" Applejack said in surprise.
"What did Prince Blueblood do?" I asked. "I think I am going to stay."
"Me too," Applejack said. She turned out to have a full house. "Hah! I win." She raked in her winnings.
I hadn't MEANT to lose that, but it's okay, it helps maintain the balance.
"He's a selfish, self-centered jerk," Pinkie said. She sighed. "That whole party was made out of not-fun-at-all. I tried my BEST to liven it up but even though Celestia enjoyed it, I have to do better, next time."
"I dunno if I'll go. Bunch of snobs," Applejack said, sipping her cider.
I sipped mine, then got the deck and started shuffling. "As they say in Karameikos, shake a noble's family tree and a bunch of farmers fall out of the upper branches. You shouldn't care what they think, Applejack," I said firmly. "YOU actually have done something useful with your life. If they look down on you, it just is because they know you're better and they're bitter over it."
She blinked. "Thanks, Marcus." She sipped her cider, and Ivan sipped his, while I continued to shuffle.
I slid the deck to Applejack and she cut it. Then I started dealing. I heard this odd beat, then I realized it was probably ponies dancing to the beat, their hooves striking the deck in unison. "Damn, I am so filthy," I said, looking at myself and sighing.
"It's the dirt of honest hard work, rightfully earned," Applejack said. She studied her cards as I dealt them. "Be proud of it."
There was a sudden sound of thunder in the sky and I jumped to my feet, dropping the deck, though I caught it with a quick spell before it hit the ground. I shouldn't have dropped it but the sound startled me.
It was, in fact, twelve flying Pegasi, soaring in a huge formation from the west. They wore matching blue uniforms and flew in formation. My eyes widened. "The Wonderbolts. I hope they're just here to escort the Duchess." And not because the end of the world is about to start NOW, right here on this rock.
"Rainbow Dash is gonna' be happy," Applejack said, smiling.
I was about to ask which one she has the crush on, but Applejack might not know about the crush, so I just licked my lips. "Rainbow Dash is a friend of them, right?"
"She saved three of them and Rarity at the Junior Flyer Competition in Cloudsdale," Pinkie said. "It was GREAT."
Wow. "That's pretty impressive."
"Rarity was using a flight spell Twilight cast on her and kinda got overconfident," Applejack said, shaking her head. "Sometimes she wants to be loved a little too much."
"Nothing wrong with wanting to be liked," I said defensively. "Everyone wants to be liked." I studied my cards. Two of Stones, Three of Stones, Six of Stones, Three of Rivers, Jack of Winds. Hmmm.
"There's probably some stallion trying to get her attention right this minute," Applejack observed, sipping cider and studying her cards.
"I'd think she'd have stallions all over her," Ivan said. "Sorry, that came out cruder than I intended."
"The boys *love* Rarity," Pinkie said. "It's how she got them to haul us in a carriage to the Grand Gala!"
Good for her, I thought. Using your sex appeal wisely is a VERY valuable tool. I expect she has a lot to ponies. "So what happened with this Prince Blueblood?" I asked.
"I bet... ten," Applejack said.
"He kept being mean to her, wouldn't be a gentleman at all. She had her heart up so high and he wouldn't even open a door for her," Pinkie said. "I am more of a gentleman than him! Open *every* door, that's my motto!"
That does not surprise me at all.
"I promise you I will not do anything like that to Rarity," I told Applejack. "He sounds like a cad, who deserved whatever he got."
"He got CAKE!" Pinkie said cheerfully. "I match Applejack and bid thirty."
He was mean to Rarity and got CAKE for it? I can't accept that. Though I doubt I'll ever see him, he'll get something worse than CAKE from me. "Well, I hope he didn't like the cake, as it sounds like he deserved much worse." Wait, 'Prince' Blueblood? How many people has Celestia elevated lately?
"I... see for now," Ivan said warily.
Now I could see Rainbow Dash up in the air with three of the Wonderbolts, all of them zipping around. Two guys and a woman, I think. I wonder which guy it is.
"I see," I said for now.
Soon everyone was discarding. I tossed all but the threes and got TWO MORE THREES. YES!
"I'm sorry to give you the tenth degree," Applejack said apologetically. "Maybe I've had too much cider." She sighed.
"It's okay, looking out for your friend is a good thing," I told her and she perked up a little. "It's perfectly normal to take a while to get to trust a stranger." It's pretty refreshing, really. Ponies often trust blindly if you seem friendly and nice and that's a good way to get hurt by a con-man who wants to abuse that trust.
"Thinking about Zecora?" Pinkie asked Applejack.
Applejack mumbled into her glass.
Ivan looked at her and frowned, then said, "You don't have to talk about it."
"Apple Bloom was the smart one there," Applejack said. She sighed deeply. "I fold."
Pinkie studied her cards.
High above, Rainbow Dash continued to zoom around with the Wonderbolts. They moved far out away from the ship, then began a long high arc over it, splitting into two pairs, each one man, one woman. I could hear ponies clapping and I smiled. She deserves it.
"Enjoying the show?" Pinkie asked.
"Yes," I said. "I've never actually gotten to see them in action."
"Dash must be in Heaven," Applejack said, perking up some.
"I raise twenty," Pinkie said.
"Dammit, fold," Ivan said, sighing.
Me versus Pinkie. Crap.
Applejack refilled my glass. "Drink up, it's good."
"Humans can't drink as much as ponies," I told her. "If I get too drunk, I might be useless if a monster shows up."
She sighed, then sipped from her glass. "Didn't think about that."
The Wonderbolts and Dash were now zipping around the ship, weaving in and out in elaborate patterns as people cheered. Someone fired off some pyrotechnics, MUCH bigger than what I can do. I was jealous.
I suspect Applejack wanted to get me drunk so she could make sure I wasn't going to be an ass like Blueblood to Rarity. Which I won't. I like her. She's classy and I like that. What an idiot that Blueblood must be.
We kept on playing and talking until it was time for dinner; the party was still going on as the ship hovered. We made dinner, then played some more cards and traded adventuring stories. It was a lot of fun. The formal party would have been more fun but with my luck, some old Glantrian acquaintance would have been there.
I... naah, Helga's probably not there. Why would a member of House Blackhill be on a Pony Duchess' ship? The Aendyrs aren't hostile to Ponies but they're not huge allies either.
To my surprise, one of the Wonderbolts came down to us with Dash, who looked happy, nervous, and excited at once. "Hey, guys, this is Soarin' of the Wonderbolts," she said. "Soarin', you know Applejack and Pinkie, but this is my new friends Samus Marcus of Thyatis and Ivan."
"Of Karameikos," he said, shaking hand to hoof with Soarin'. I shook hand-to-hoof with Soarin' too.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," I told him. "Do you like pie?"
"I LOVE pie," he said.
I gave Applejack a meaningful look.
She perked up and got out a pie and tossed it to him. He ate it down VERY quickly, while Dash bopped about him goofily, looking excited.
"How come you're not up at the party?" he asked.
"We're filthy messes," I said ruefully. "I wish I could go but I lost all my clothing except this and a sweater vest Rarity and Twilight made for me."
"Rarity looks kinda guilty for some reason," Rainbow Dash mused. "Twilight's talking to the Duchess about... crops and things."
Applejack said, "Oh great, NOW she wants to talk about crops." She sounded quite cross.
"I got bored in three seconds flat and fortunately, Soarin' and Spitfire invited me to come fly with them," Dash said cheerfully.
"I assume they want to increase their imports of silk and cotton and satin from Equestria?" Ivan said. "What are they offering?"
Applejack and Dash blinked in unison.
"I... yeah. I think so. How... did you know?" Dash said.
"Cotton? Hmm," Applejack said thoughtfully. "Doesn't seem fancy enough for them. I own some cotton clothin'."
"Servants have to wear clothing too," Ivan pointed out to her.
"Oh," Applejack said.
"There's some humans with them too," Dash said. "They're dressed VERY fancily."
"Are they from House Blackhill?" I asked.
"Dunno. They're kinda dark haired, neatly dressed, fine immaculate uniforms, kind of military style," Dash said.
"Aalbaneese?" I asked.
"Dunno. Where is that?"
"It's a Principality in Glantri."
Dash looked at Soarin'; he shrugged. "I dunno."
There's no way Jagger is here, but Prince Jagger is one of the world's greatest dragon-stompers. He could probably whip this dragon's ass totally, saving me having to risk horrible death in order to live five more minutes.
I WISH Jagger was here. Five minutes is five more precious minutes.
I WISH I had nice clean clothing, so I could be dancing and schmoozing and enjoying myself. I'm sure Rarity is a good dancer; we'd have some fun. It's nice having someone around who appreciates things like this.
"Can you fly?" Soarin' asked me.
Either he only ta... of course he mainly encounters humans as adventurers. Some of whom can fly.
"Twilight has a spell to give wings," Dash said. "But Marcus doesn't know it."
"Yes," I said. "I've seen it but I don't know it well enough to do from scratch. And I'm too filthy to go up and have no clean clothing."
"I'll see about that," Dash said. "You should be up there."
She zoomed upwards with Soarin'.
"Well, dang," Ivan said. "I guess you'll be bailing on us."
"If she can find clothing to fit me. I doubt the Aalbaneese will just give her clothing," I said.
"It's fine," Applejack said, a little morosely. "You go have fun. I'll just take all of Ivan's money."
"Then I'll take yours and Ivan will take mine and we'll all be even," Pinkie said cheerfully.
Now I felt bad leaving them down here.
Not quite bad enough not to go if I had the chance.
I am a sucker for big formal parties, even if I usually end up running for my life.
Which could be risky on a big flying ship.
Hmm, I suspect Celestia was worried these diplomats would get eaten by the dragon, thus the dispatch of Twilight's team.
Of course, if Jagger is here, he may have manipulated the Dragon into raiding Equestria, so he could then 'save' Equestria from it. I frowned at the thought. What would he...
Jagger is obsessed with invading Ethengar, which is full of crazed swordsmen and archers on horseback. He probably wants a Pony army to take them on with. Good luck there, Jagger. Celestia isn't going to dance to your tune and if she did, well, Ponies are not exactly aggressive, usually.
I went and took a bath while I was waiting, just in case. Ivan did likewise. I kept thinking someone was watching us, but I couldn't spot Pinkie and I assumed Applejack, despite her advocacy of nudity, would not just peep on us.
But I had the distinct feeling of being watched. "Ivan, someone's watching us."
"Whatever. I don't particularly care if they see us naked," Ivan said. "I'm surprised you do."
"You don't have a tattoo that will cause Spike and Twilight to know about your past encounters with them, resulting in your horrible, horrible death," I said very softly, hoping the spy didn't know about this.
Though now I probably just told them.
FUCK ME.
Ivan grinning at me did not make me feel better. "Too bad Helga isn't likely to be there."
"Yeah," I said. "Though she wouldn't know this me."
We got clean, though we only had filthy clothing to put back on afterwards. Still, it makes me feel more human.
I like feeling human.
To my surprise, Dash and Soarin' returned with two full SUITS, each sized appropriately for Ivan and myself. "Twilight says for you two to suit up also," Dash said to Applejack and Pinkie. "Time for us to REPRESENT."
The suits looked Aalbanese to me. "Did someone talk them into loaning these to you?"
"Rarity bought them for you," Dash said. "Once I raised the idea. These guys all had spare clothing and, well, offer enough bits and you can buy anything, I guess."
I wonder how many bits. Though these are NICE.
"Okay, Ivan," I said. "Let's go change, and then it is party time."
I was looking forward to it.
*************
Several more of the Wonderbolts assisted us all getting up. Ivan was kind of nervous, which I didn't understand until I remembered the Wonderbolts had been involved in recovering the Pearl he hocked and they might have had some clues as to who did it. Though not very good ones or I assume they would have found us long ago.
The entire deck of the flying ship was one giant party. Humans and ponies and elves were intermingled, having a grand time. To be precise, they were the dark-skinned (but not evil, merely arrogant) elves of the Principality of Belcadiz. A principality from which I was permanently exiled in another of my past bodies. Due to having an affair with Dona Carlotta, daughter of Don Diego, the younger brother of Princess Carnelia. Princess Carnelia was not here, but Don Diego WAS. I couldn't see Dona Carlotta, but if her father was here... Belcadizians, Aalbanese, and Glantrian Ponies. What on Mystara is going on?
A mixed band of all three races was providing the music. One thing I noted is that Dash was right. The Ponies didn't JUST wear clothing, they wore a TON of it. I'm taking 3-5 layer dresses, suits cut to fit a Stallion, and so on. I could probably buy half of Karameikos with the amount of jewelry on display.
I then had to suppress the part of my brain that began planning how best to make off with it. Given my only escape route from this ship is either the Wonderbolts, Fluttershy, Twilight, or Dash, I am not going to do anything too foolish.
No one will know me in this body, I reminded myself. And even if...
I now saw Twilight; she was up on a dais with a blue coated pony with a pink and green mane done up in a fancy bun. Duchess Sapphire of Sugar Hollow (or so I presumed) was busy greeting guests and generally doing the 'look at how awesome I am, everyone come kiss my ass' routine of a noble holding court. Twilight was stuck basically helping her to greet guests; Spike was lurking by her, looking bored out of his skull.
Dash said softly, "We told them all your fancy clothing was destroyed in the swamp and that Ivan is a Karameikan Baron and you're a Thyatian Count."
Ivan grinned. "Sweet."
I have to say my respect for Dash increased when she cunningly pulled this giant scam out of her head spontaneously when needed. It's what I would have done and it means I will be treated with respect instead of being hired help.
I'm a little nervous the Aalbanese will see through the bluff, though; they're of Thyatian descent in part and keep tabs on their homeland, though they've lived in Glantri for centuries.
I could see Herr Sigmund, Jagger's son and heir. He's a noted inventor and quite dashing with short black hair, a nice physique and impeccably dressed. He was busy dancing with some Glantrian pony I didn't know; I could see she was as versed in improvised bipedalism as Pinkie, though.
Pinkie adjusted her hat. "Let's party!" She then plunged into the fray.
Applejack looked around uncomfortably at everything and Dash said, "Come on, we've got to go see the Duchess. She's REALLY eager to meet you two. And you too, Countess Applejack."
"Wait, when did I become a Countess?" Applejack said.
"When Twilight became a Duchess," I said.
"When did we all get noble titles?" Applejack said, slightly panicked.
"Just pretend you are Marcus and all will be well," Ivan said, patting her back.
A lot of the ponies here were faking bipedalism as much as they could, I noticed. They were fairly good at it, really. I never visited Dream Valley during my time in Glantri; it's off in the northwest part of the country, I think. Around Fort Sablestone, by the Adri Varna Plateau. Which means constant invasion by horrible monsters.
Rainbow Dash and Soarin' helped us press through the mass of people towards the dais, but then, I saw her.
Dona Carlotta.
Slender and short, elegant and graceful, with long flowing black hair down to the middle of her back, wearing a four layered dress in reds, greens, and blacks, a silver earring with an emerald shaped like a rose in each ear. She is probably the most beautiful woman I have ever touched.
She had ascended the dais, and while her father spoke to Duchess Sapphire, she was busy talking to Twilight.
Given she knew me as Erik of Vestland...
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
"What's wrong?" Dash whispered to me, hovering next to me.
"Nothing," I said urgently. She won't know me, she can't see my tattoo, it's under several layers of clothing, EVERYTHING is going to be okay.
I can probably survive falling from this height if I aim for the water.
Carlotta and I actually parted on good terms. Her grandmother simply decided I was no good for her AND a human, therefore, I had to go. I could have... I felt a great deal of sadness seeing her, though it was good to see she seemed to be doing well. She wanted to go with me, but her mother forbade it, and the will of a Princess of Glantri is not easily evaded. In case you're wondering, this was about six months before I went to Equestria.
I want to talk to her, but if I do, I will do something STUPID. I can smell it. But I may have no choice.
Dash, Soarin', Ivan, Applejack, and I pressed up and waited for Don Diego to finish talking to Duchess Sapphire.
"I assure you, the use of black puddings for food disposal is perfectly safe, so long as you periodically flush it with fire to check the growth of the pudding," Don Diego said. He's an expert on slime monsters and similar monstrosities. If you're not careful, he will trap you for hours and lecture you on why gray ooze and grey ooze are NOT the same creature at all.
Hours I will NEVER get back.
But he's a good guy at heart, humble and kind. Just with a tendency to ramble endlessly about his academic obsessions.
"Mother drove him into exile because I was an Elf and he was Human," Carlotta said to Twilight. She sighed, sagging a little. "It was a great tragedy."
WHY ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT ME?
Ivan grinned and punched my shoulder.
Damn you, Ivan.
Twilight's eyes widened as she drew the conclusion from that which I KNEW she would. "But Celestia..." She suddenly looked very nervous.
"Dear Sapphire, may I borrow Twilight?" Carlotta said to Sapphire. "We need to talk in private."
"That's fine, dearie," Sapphire said to her. "Take her to your quarters below deck No one will bother you there. I can have refreshments sent."
"Oh yes, please," Carlotta said. "Some of your nice brandy."
Sweet mother of Ixion, I am going to DIE. DIE DIE.
I breathed out and came forward with everyone. Rainbow Dash said, "Duchess Sapphire, I present to you, Countess Applejack of Apple Acres, head of the House of Apple. Baron Ivan of Novgorod in Karameikos, and Count Samus Marcus of Samuspolis in Thyatis."
'Samuspolis'. Well, it does at least match up the right pattern.
A huge amount of hand-kissing and hoof-kissing ensued. I noted that Duchess Sapphire wore... would you call them slippers? Gloves? They were fine silken sacks around her hooves, dyed blue to match her coat. And she had a very nice tiara of platinum, studded with sapphires.
"You throw a grand party, Duchess," I said, bowing to her. "I am very flattered to be invited to such a high class affair."
"Now, now," she said. "You stand only two ranks below me. If I only invited Dukes and Archdukes and Princes, this would be a very small party. All nobles are welcome here. Twilight tells me you are a wizard like myself."
"I fear I am not up to the shining level you set for the rest of us," I said. I have no clue at all how good she is, but all Glantrian nobles must graduate from the Great School of Magic and then get Parliament to appoint them to a titled position. Or inherit it, but even that requires Parliament. You must at minimum be a pretty good wizard and then you need political skills or strong allies. At minimum, she has the power level needed to teleport, force people into other shapes temporarily, commune with extra-planar entities to learn secrets, and other tricks of like potency. That's about halfway up the ladder of spell potency. And it's nothing to sneeze at. Which actual spells and rituals she knows, I don't know.
Mind you, Twilight's about two or three rungs higher than that, I think.
I then conjured a bouquet of blue flowers. "But a gift for you," I said, bowing and handing them to her. She smelled them and smiled.
One of her servants took them and now got a vase for them.
"A wizard AND gracious," Duchess Amethyst said. "Oh yes, this is Don Diego, *brother* of Princess Carnelia, his daughter Carlotta, and of course you know the great *Duchess* Twilight Sparkle."
Ahh, yes, the classic reflected glory trick. By having such important people around her, it makes her look more important. This is a woman who knows how to play the game. Very good.
"I specialize in fire magics," I told her, making a flame dance. "Applejack specializes in plant and animal control magics, and Ivan specializes in getting in trouble."
She laughed at that, and Applejack blinked.
"I would of course expect the great Twilight Sparkle to surround herself with skilled wizards," Duchess Sapphire said.
Applejack started to speak and Ivan whispered to her and Applejack's eyes crossed. Duchess Sapphire got an odd smile on her face, then said, "Thank you all for coming. I hope you will enjoy the party."
Carlotta led Twilight Sparkle off and I prayed this would not lead to doom.
******************
"I ain't no wizard," Applejack said a little later.
"I know but when in Thyatis, stab like the Thyatians do, you know," Dash said nervously.
"You did the right thing," I told her. "There's no point in us getting mocked because we don't follow their customs where anyone who isn't a wizard is second-class at best."
"You are a wizard," Applejack pointed out.
"Yes, but I don't like seeing my friends mocked," I told her.
Dash and I now high-fived. "Exactly," Dash said. "Anyway, a Cutie Mark's as good as being a Wizard."
"I am going to find Rarity and thank her," I told the others. "She's probably dancing."
She was, in fact. Some stallion unknown to me with a green mane and a brown coat, wearing a fancy navy blue suit, was busy dancing with her. I went and got some punch and a cookie, waiting for the music to end, then swept in and took her before anyone else could pounce. The waltz is a fine dance, though like any human dance, difficult for a pony. Rarity, however, was quite graceful despite the need to rise up on her hind-legs for it.
Pony dances, designed FOR ponies, usually involve a lot of what you might call 'line dancing', where groups of ponies match each other, sometimes in two lines facing each other. Done well, it can be very impressive and plays to pony strengths.
It was clear to me that the ponies of Glantri, though, were trying very hard to be just like their human and elven neighbors. Which was a little surreal to see.
"You look smashing," Rarity said warmly to me.
"You look enchanting," I told her. "Knowing you made it yourself makes it even more impressive," I continued as we waltzed. One hand on her side, I guided her to move into a box step, which is four sets of quarter turns, so you rotate around a fixed point. She moved gracefully; I'm guessing she must have some experience at this, as she doesn't normally go bipedal as much as Pinkie does.
"You flatter me," she said, smiling and letting me guide her, one of her forelegs on my shoulder, the other wrapped around my back. "My dress is hardly the most beautiful here," she said modestly.
"Yes, but you MADE yours. The rest either cheated with magic or just paid money for it," I told her. "You earned your beauty by the sweat of your brow."
That clearly pleased her. I am VERY good at buttering people up.
We danced and flattered each other through several more dances, greatly enjoying ourselves. Well, praised each other. Her skills really do impress me. But you know how it is with elegant conversation. There is an art to the verbal dance. It's one I am good at, which is how I met Dona Carlotta and how we became lovers.
I would have... Dammit. I really liked her, you know. But her mother... I can't prove she's the head of the Secret Craft of Witchcraft, but I can't prove the sun will rise tomorrow, either.
For a sudden moment, I was intensely terrified that Celestia was going to show up. With Carnelia. And Twilight's parents. And I felt someone was watching me. I looked around and realized several couples were watching us, and I felt less paranoid. There were other ponies dancing with non-ponies here, but of course, they don't know either of us.
Then a couple suddenly zoomed in at the end of a dance, the stallion taking Rarity and the mare taking me. Well, time to make some contacts for the future, assuming I don't die horribly or have to abandon this identity, both of which seem likely.
The stallion, by the way, had a magnificent FOUR layered hat. FOUR layers. Damn, I was jealous.
**************
I ended up dancing with a ton of people. Humans, elves, ponies and all. I had stopped to have some punch and a slice of chocolate cake when Twilight Sparkle and Dona Carlotta came up to me. I did my best to show no fear. "I hope you're enjoying the party," I said.
Dona Carlotta said, "It cannot be denied that Duchess Sapphire throws a great party. Would you do me the pleasure of a dance?"
I felt my legs lock up. "I would be happy to," I said.
"Don't mind me, I have to go represent for Celestia," Twilight said, sighing.
"You should at least ask Ivan to dance with you before you go back to representing," I told her. I would have offered, but given I just agreed to dance with Carlotta, I can't.
I hate seeing Twilight sad. It makes me feel guilty and... dammit, my guilt is now up and wandering around my mind again.
"I'm not sure if..."
Ivan now ambled our way. "Hello, everyone."
"Ivan, dance with Twilight," I said.
"..."
"I don't want to impose," Twilight said.
I gave Ivan the STARE. He touched his forehead, then said, "Let's dance, Twilight."
I led Carlotta out onto the dance floor, taking her hands parallel to mine for a traditional Belcadizian dance, the cha-cha. Basically, you only touch hands, so you have to guide your partner by pushing or pulling their hands, or moving the linked hands, side to side. In fact, you basically touch palms. It requires sensitivity and grace, and thus is ideal for Elves.
She smiled broadly as we moved into the cha-cha. "Have you been to Belcadiz, Samus?" she asked.
"I have met Belcadizians. And in Thyatis, we like to draw upon every culture, taking their best ideas. Like this." We glided sideways as I gently nudged her palms left, then back, then right then forwards again, and then I spun her around. "So what brings you here?"
"We import wheat and other grains and certain spell components from Equestria and trade worked metal and rare fruits in return. The current trade agreement expires soon, along with several others. I think the Aalbanese are here about a trade agreement, also," she said.
I marched us gradually around the room as we danced, then did a spin myself, and then she did one and then we both spun in unison. "I expect Herr Sigmund wants to sell Celestia some of his inventions."
"Creepy mechanical things," she said, shivering. The Belcadizians are more like humans than most Elves, but they don't love machinery any more than most elves do.
"They have their uses," I told her. "I'm sure Celestia will give you a fair deal, if you don't mind a few pranks."
"Pranks?" Dona Carlotta said weakly. She was never as fond of a good prank as I am.
Perhaps best I not introduce her to Pinkie.
"I love a good prank too," Pinkie said behind me. ...
She was dancing with a befuddled looking Aalbanese noble with short brown hair and a short, neatly trimmed beard. "Hello, I am Herr Ukvarth of Graez," he said. I noticed he had an odd looking wand holstered at his hip, L-shaped and made of black metal, tubular with runes but no gems. Was it Blackmoorian? That looks like their work.
"He's a DRAGON HUNTER," Pinkie said. "I want him to talk to Twilight."
"It's nice to meet you," I said to him. The name was vaguely familiar.
"A pleasure to meet you, Herr Ukvarth," Dona Carlotta said. "I am Dona Carlotta de Belcadiz."
"The legendary beauty," he said, taking her hand and kissing it. "So you are the Count of Samuspolis," Herr Ukvarth said. "It's a very nice place, but I haven't been there in quite some time. How is it doing?"
There are two possibilities. One, he is bluffing in order to look cosmopolitan and traveled and sophisticated. This is plausible. Second, this is his subtle way of saying he knows I am LYING and letting me know he knows, so that he has a hold on me. This is also plausible and since I have never heard of him, it could go either way.
Graez is home to about half of the von Drachenfels, and the other half live in the Principality's capital, Leenz. I don't know the details beyond that, though.
I now became aware Rarity was pointing at me for some reason as she danced with somepony I didn't know. WHY?
I tried not to think about it. Someone may have me by the balls and it isn't Rarity or the stallion she's dancing with.
"Quite well; the weather has been good, so the fish are flourishing," I said. "Everyone is no doubt busy with that this very minute. This left me free to come to Equestria on some business, and of course, I had to help the Duchess with Vermicoritax. We hope for a peaceful resolution."
The four of us danced together; Pinkie was VERY adept at the cha-cha and I had to wonder where she learned it. Better, indeed, than Herr Ukvarth He, though, was good enough at leading that our two couples bobbed and weaved around each other without ever colliding.
"With a black dragon?" he said dubiously.
"Princess Celestia believes in trying diplomacy first, even with the worst of foes. And so does Duchess Twilight. I am simply along for the ride," I told him.
"Black dragons are horrible creatures who live only to kill and destroy and ruin," Dona Carlotta said, worried.
"Fluttershy will scare him off if he won't negotiate," Pinkie said with absolute assurance.
I find this to be VERY dubious.
Herr Ukvarth looked more dubious than I and now Dona Carlotta looked very worried. Pinkie smiled with serene, absolute confidence. Or dementia. Or both.
"Her?" he said. He pointed to Fluttershy; she was dancing with a unicorn stallion and looked extremely nervous and panicky and clearly didn't like being in the middle of the huge herd of sentients around her.
"Yes," Pinkie said. "She is fierce as a manticore, wrathful as a gorgon, mighty as a fire elemental king!" She sounded quite cheerful about this.
Herr Ukvarth studied me, probably trying to decide if this was a joke on him, if we were all insane, or what. I simply glided around him with Dona Carlotta. "They've dealt with dragons before," I told him. Show no fear, I told myself.
"I would hate to see Duchess Twilight get hurt," Dona Carlotta said. "We have a mutual... friend. And she is very nice."
They talked about me. Other me. I am going to kill myself now.
"How large is your group?"
By the time we finished the dance, I had told Ukvarth everything... a version of everything... excluding my personal secrets, of course. He did not seem a lot more optimistic. "Countess Pinkie, I am sorry to run off on you," he said. "I must speak with your lady."
"I don't have a lady, I prefer men," Pinkie said, confused.
"He means Twilight," I told her.
"But we're not pillowfriends," Pinkie said, confused.
"She is your leader," I said while Herr Ukvarth stared at us.
"OH, yes, totally," Pinkie said. "Unless it's a party and then I lead the charge. Like right now! Twilight's all busy shaking hands and hooves and being pouty instead of having FUN."
Herr Ukvarth bowed to Pinkie. "It was a pleasure, fair lady," he said.
She tried to curtsy and fell down. "Oops!" She laughed and Dona Carlotta helped her up.
Carlotta, always so kind to others... unlike most Belcadizians, who tend to be pretty arrogant. But then, her father is a scholar and quite gracious.
And she'll still be young and beautiful when I am old and dead. Maybe it was for the best that her aunt kicked me out.
But I'd rather have taken my chances with the worst. But I'm also not stupid enough to take another run at it. I'll just stand here and be nostalgic and sad, which I hate being.
"Cookie?" Pinkie said, offering us each one as Herr Ukvarth headed off to see Twilight.
I took it and ate it quickly; Dona Carlotta nibbled at hers gracefully. "Thanks, Pinkie."
"Anything for a friend!" She said, "I'm off to teach the musicians how to play something cool!"
Urk.
**************
To my surprise, the band went along with it and soon the place was jumping with some very lively music, even if I couldn't keep up with... Was Pinkie singing about how a pie did her wrong and ran around with other girls?
This was actually Shires style music. They like their music fast and lively; halflings like to jitterbug. I'd ended up dancing with Rarity again, as Carlotta had run off to see Twilight once the previous song ended. She was having a hard time of it; the Jitterbug is REALLY not designed for Ponies. But I guided her through it and gripped her hooves as best I could. A big part of the problem is that the Jitterbug relies on hand to hand grips, which you change during certain moves and, well, she can't grip due to having hooves. But she looked almost grimly determined to do it and do it WELL.
Every mistake, she let me correct her and kept doing things over and over until she got it right. Cheating with my magic a little also helped me keep hold of her hooves. I think she did the same.
Golden horseshoes, by the way, as you probably expected.
For a moment, I had that feeling of being watched, but then it passed.
Rarity blinked. "Did you feel that?"
"Yes," I said, frowning. "Did someone scry us?"
"Not for long," she said softly.
It was time to see Twilight, who was surrounded by people who were all trying to tell her how to kill Dragons. She looked rather overwhelmed, especially since Dona Carlotta was working on building up a pretty powerful level of panic.
"Dona Carlotta, I hate to impose, but is it possible we could speak with Twilight in your chambers? It is quite important."
Herr Ukvarth was busy talking about the apparently copious misdeeds of Vermicoritax at a mile a minute. He was not happy when Carlotta consented and we dragged her off.
"I need to talk to you later, Rarity," Twilight told us as we relaxed in the remarkably large and spacious suite. This ship was clearly bigger below decks than it was on the outside and I briefly feared this would trigger saddlebag ruptures, but it seemed everything was okay.
You should NEVER put one set of Pony saddlebags inside another, or they both burst and dump their contents into the Astral Plane. This is, to say the least, inconvenient.
Rarity nodded. "Of course."
Dona Carlotta's servants brought us spiced brandy and these really delectable Belcadizian cakes which twisted in stripes into a big circle with cinnamon layers between the cake layers. I had to just eat one. Spike ate four, all at once.
"Someone scried us," I told Twilight.
"I think someone scried me too," she said, frowning.
"Not I," Dona Carlotta said.
"Unfortunately, the rest of our friends probably didn't notice," I said.
Twilight frowned. "Spike, take a letter."
"MRPHMRHMRPOH."
Dona Carlotta patted his head. "You're adorable, Spike."
Why does her voice have to still sound like liquid sunshine? I remember standing with her on that balcony at the Alhambra, kissing her as the sun came up and we said...
Things that never came true. Couldn't, but they felt like they would at the time. Promises I wanted to keep but her mother thought otherwise.
Damn me.
I tried to be serious about it for once and it all blew up anyway.
What's the point of even trying if you always end up running for your life?
I tried to rein in my angst.
DAMMIT.
I breathed in, then out.
"Dear Princess Celestia, I am very, very sorry to bother you at this hour. I have made contact with Duchess Sapphire and her guests, over the Malpheggi Swamp. The Wonderbolts have arrived to escort them safely, and we are still heading to deal with Vermicoritax. However, someone is scrying us and I did not bring any of my books on scrying and thus do not have any defense. We are not even sure why someone is scrying us. It's VERY impolite."
I couldn't help but smile nervously at that. As if there was a way to scry politely.
"I request further instructions on what we can offer him in return for his refraining from further raids," Twilight Sparkle said. "I have been informed he is rather a hard case."
"He might go for the Crucible," I said. Much as I would rather SELL IT FOR GOLD. But since I have to live that long to sell it, better to lose it than MY LIFE.
"We have a Crucible of Blackflame. Do you think he might like it? Marcus suggested that we try that," Twilight added as Spike scribbled. "Please reply tonight. Your faithful student and friend, Twilight Sparkle."
Spike now sent it whisking away. I suddenly wondered how much she had told Celestia about me. ACK.
We made small talk with the others about the party. Then Rarity and I had to show Twilight how to Jitterbug. Seeing her and Carlotta dance with each other, both trying to lead, amused me.
TWO letters now arrived via Spike Flame. One was marked 'From Mom and Dad', the other marked 'To my beloved student and friend, Twilight Sparkle'. Twilight's parents are hanging out with Celestia right now?
"Oh wow, it's from Mom and Dad," Twilight said and quickly read it. First, I will note. She smiled brightly and handed it to Spike to hold onto. Then she turned to the second one.
The problem, though, with bribing Vermicoritax is that he's likely to expect regular tribute payments and that's problematic, though less than being raided by a Grand Wyrm. I have to agree with Herr Ukvarth that black dragons are not even slightly trustworthy.
But it's ponies. Force is always the last option after diplomacy, sharing and caring, pies, and so on.
Also, I am not sure we have enough force, though with the Elements of Harmony and Twilight's vast power, we may get a simple 'Twilight makes a new pancake, Spike eats it' scenario.
Spike's pancakes are better but less cosmic.
"What did she say?" Carlotta said, very worried.
"She advised me to tell Duchess Sapphire about the scrying and that the idea of offering the Crucible sounded reasonable to her, and some other ideas on things we can offer him," Twilight said. "And that she trusts my discretion." She blushed a little.
She turned the page. "She says that Herr Ukvarth is an expert on killing things but that if you have a hammer, you tend to go looking for nails."
Rarity and I both laughed at that; Spike and Carlotta laughed a few seconds later.
"If you try peace, you can still fight if peace fails; if you go straight to war, peace becomes impossible," Twilight read to us. She nodded. "And... hmm, interesting."
"Interesting?" I asked.
"She has a page of coded orders for me to give to the Wonderbolts." She held it up; the letters constantly changed and shuffled. Nice magical security.
"I can have a servant deliver them," Carlotta said.
"I'll do it myself as it must be secret." Twilight paused. "Nothing personal, you know I trust you, Carlotta."
"Of course," Carlotta said, taking her hoof. "We have shared an experience."
Spike held up a hand to his mouth and sidled over to Rarity and whispered to her, shielding his mouth, "Girl talk," he said. Rarity laughed softly. "But I got to skip it and go to the snack bar."
A blessing indeed, but I know what they talked about. Another nail for my coffin.
I am going to die hatless. Dammit.
"Oh yes," Carlotta said to Rarity. "I have a present for you."
It turned out to be a fair sized piece of red felt and a spool of green thread. "This is one of our trade samples, but you can have it."
"Oh, darling, I can hardly take something you need to sell your wares," Rarity said, though her eyes said 'YES MINE MINE MINE'. Her voice though, sounded a little guilty.
"I can summon more," Carlotta said.
"You know how to summon cloth?" Rarity said, eyes lighting up.
"It can only summon, not create, but yes," Carlotta said.
"Teach me," Rarity said urgently. Then she looked embarrassed. "I am sorry, Dona Carlotta. That was rude of me."
"I would be happy to teach you," she said. "Count Marcus, why don't you escort Twilight up to see the Duchess?"
"Of course," I said. "You are in good hands, Rarity." Very good hands.
Twilight had this... weirdly naughty look. And triumphant.
Oh dear.
*************
"You were looking rather gleeful," I said to her as we headed upstairs.
"Nope, not gleeful at all," she said. "Nothing is going on, nothing at all. Let's focus on the here and now and not the future."
The future? What?
"Do you think..." She paused and looked at me hesitantly, though she kept moving and so did I.
"Sometimes, I think," I said and she laughed.
"I wish the others could tell if someone scried them. It could be a unicorn hunter." She grimaced. "Most of them pick off ponies outside Equestria, but... we are outside Equestria. And this place would have a huge number of horns."
"I think only a madman would attack this many wizards AND the Wonderbolts," I said. "And Ethengars can't fly."
"Actually, there's a group of Pegasi and other ponies who live with the Ethengars," Twilight said. "They've gotten large enough to carry small, wiry humans by selective breeding and magic." ...
Those damn things are SENTIENT? But they're normal horse colored.
"Their Great Khan has Celestia very worried," Twilight continued. "But he'd have to cross Darokin to strike us and I doubt he'd make it this far."
We now reached the deck and went and passed the message to one of the Wonderbolts, who took it to their leader, Blue Angel. He read it, then frowned. "Lady Twilight," he said. "I've been ordered to detach Spitfire and Soarin' to assist you. The rest of us will remain with the Duchess and escort her floating party to Canterlot."
"Oh, that's very nice of you," Twilight said warmly. "I'm sure he'll be honored that two of the Wonderbolts came with us."
Given the Wonderbolts have fought dragons and won, this may be an intimidation measure. Or just reinforcements.
I hope it doesn't come down to a fight. If we have to kill it... if we can kill it, it will hurt Twilight. I can tell she doesn't want to hurt it unless she has no choice. Ponies are like that. Though if we do fight it and win, likely Twilight will turn it into a potato and that's how.
I don't want to fight it because I fear dying horribly. I've seen too much of that already.
Why was Twilight being so happy and naughty at once earlier? WHY?
That bothered me.
"I just hope it's enough," Blue Angel said. He was a sturdy blue-coated pony with a purple mane with streaks of red. You couldn't see his cutie mark, due to his unusual full-body uniform. All the Wonderbolts dress like that, along with the goggles.
"Me too," I confessed.
"I'll tell Soarin' and Spitfire," Blue Angel said, and headed out.
"Let's dance," Twilight said to me.
So I took her out on the floor and we danced. I couldn't help but flashback to my days in Canterlot.
Dammit, I hate flashbacks, they're a sign of senility, I'm sure.
*************
INVOLUNTARY FLASHBACK WHICH IS PROBABLY A SIGN OF ENCROACHING SENILITY, DAMMIT:
I was surprised Celestia was escorting me personally to meet with someone. I had done some adventuring after having to flee Belcadiz, and for once, I had held onto some money. I decided to go to Equestria, which would be nice and peaceful. I had made some pony friends when I'd visited Ierendi, and they'd told me about how nice and boring Equestria was. I wanted to try and further my magical studies, especially how to avoid witches' curses.
For obvious reasons.
When I arrived in Canterlot, I fell down exhausted, having stupidly decided to walk up the stairs to save money.
I know, laugh at me, I was being an idiot.
I woke up in a special ward for idiots like me. Mostly human idiots. But there was, to my shock, a letter from Princess Celestia. It was very friendly and though I was very nervous, I went to see her despite the part of me which said I ought to flee somewhere safe, like the Broken Lands.
During the period between Belcadiz and Equestria, I had, among other things, helped to deal with an attempt by one of the Entropic cults (Orcus to be precise) to destroy the city of Akorros. Celestia had learned of this and asked me about it. Then, to my surprise, she asked me to teach at her school about humans to her students.
The pay was generous, I had access to the libraries, and no one was going to kill me. And honestly, ponies are not hard to teach. At least at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. They are EAGER to learn. Most of them. Some are slackers, but I've been that, so it doesn't bother me.
Twilight had already taken the classes I taught, moved on to more advanced studies. But Celestia introduced me to her after I'd settled in; I had heard stories about her from the other students. A genius but obsessive and anti-social.
Typical wizard, in other words.
Her place... was huge. She had her own tower, multiple stories, lushly decorated... I was totally jealous, of course. Who wouldn't be? You could fit an entire Karameikan village in her tower and it was just her and Spike.
"Twilight, my little pony, this is my dear friend Erik of Vestland, the new Teacher of Humanics," Celestia said warmly to Twilight, who was busy reading three books and scribbling in three columns on a piece of paper, while Spike was busy searching a bookshelf nearby. Also, I did not invent the name 'Humanics'. Blame the ponies.
"It's nice to meet you, Erik," she said, without even looking up. She paused, then looked up, embarrassed. "Hello, Princess Celestia, it's so nice to see you. I... oh no, this place is a total disaster! Spike, start cleaning up! Celestia, let me get you some tea!" She ran frantically up the stairs.
"Wait, Twilight... oh dear, can you help her, Erik?" Celestia asked.
"Of course," I said, running up the stairs. I found Twilight in the kitchen, trying to fill a teapot, water going everywhere as she became too frantic to aim it accurately, ensuring more water and more frantic.
I turned the water off, took the pot, turned the water back on, and filled it. "Can you do Etienne's Swift Warming?" I asked her.
"Of course," she said proudly. "I can light a fireplace too, or several torches at once." She blinked. "You're a unicorn human?" She studied my head.
"I am a wizard like you," I told her, smiling. If not on her level, from what Celestia told me.
Soon, the kettle was warming up, floating in the air and wrapped in a simple but useful spell. Meanwhile, I had gotten out some black tea bags, ready for steeping.
"I thought you taught Humanics," she said as we waited and she got out snacks with her powers.
"I do, fair lady Twilight," I told her. "But magic is a deep part of our history," I continued. "I noticed you seem to be trying to synchronize some passages from two history books and an astronomy text. May I ask why?"
"Do you know what the Twin Sisters are?" she asked.
"Sixty-five year cycle today, first observed by the Alphatians shortly after they arrived on Mystara, roughly two thousand years ago, at which time it had a ninety three year cycle. It stabilized in its current cycle around... seven hundred years ago? Roughly," I said. "I think it last appeared two years ago." Which is why I knew any of this. It's a comet with TWO tails, one of which is green. I couldn't help but notice it. EVERYONE couldn't help it.
"Wait, it changed its cycle?"
"It was slowly speeding up, until, for some reason, it stopped."
The tea was now ready, so we headed down. "Aaargh, none of my books explained that! So you couldn't use it to reliably match dates of different countries."
"You can if you know the pattern, but you'd need Ar's Guide to Celestial Bodies, Volume III: Comets," I told her. My copy, acquired out of curiosity over that comet, was stolen in the Heldaan Freeholds, if I remember correctly. "It's been so long, I only remember the outline."
"Well, maybe you can help me deduce it from the records I have access to," she said hesitantly.
Curry some favor with Celestia's favorite student? HELL YEAH. "I would love to," I told her.
She smiled. "Thanks. Spike loves to help me but he's just a baby." I then got to hear the story of how she got Spike, and we rejoined Celestia and the others.
*************
I had never danced with Twilight before this. Except once, when we were drunk. We could have gone to the Grand Galloping Gala, but we had a conjunction to observe and then we thought we'd discovered a new planet. (IT WAS A BEHOLDER. By the way, if you run away under a fear spell in Canterlot, there are LOTS of ways to fall from a height. Just a warning to the traveler)
Working with Twilight was a totally different experience in my life than almost anything else. Carlotta and I had done some magical work together, but she wasn't driven to learn constantly like Twilight is. Carlotta and I spent a lot of time walking in gardens, going to restaurants, writing and reading love poems to each other, dancing, the usual stuff.
Twilight was driven. Some nights, we fell asleep in the library. Or among books on the floor of her study room. A lot of nights, she'd be studying three things at once, and I'd be busy correcting student papers or trying to plan out lessons, while Spike ran around helping us. Spike is a very good guy and I hate that he hates me now.
I hope I was a good teacher. It's the only time I've ever done it. I think I learned as much as I taught; I had to research constantly in order to avoid screwing things up.
I also got chewed out by the Philosophy teacher, Wise Precepts, because... well, you can't help it. I couldn't teach about humans without teaching how humans think and she didn't agree with me. On how humans SHOULD think.
Which led to her and Twilight having a big fight, to my regret.
Twilight is very loyal to her friends. Which at that point was basically Celestia, Spike and I, though the two of us sometimes managed to push her to actually do things with her fellow students. Our luck was limited. She was too driven.
"Marcus, are you having a flashback?" she asked me and I started and returned to the present.
"I am SO sorry," I told her. "I have too much past."
"There's never too much past," Twilight said. She sighed. "The Thyatians are telling lies about him."
"Who?" I asked.
"Erik," she said softly. "They claim he seduced an Ambassador's harem." She grimaced. "He wouldn't do that."
I set them free and helped them to escape, in fact. They didn't want to be his harem but he owned them. I know, disgusting. Slavery is really the worst aspect of Thyatis. "One woman should be enough for any man," I said. "I certainly wouldn't last long trying to have more than one."
"I know," she said. "You're a good man, like Erik was. But I understand better now why he left. But Celestia wasn't like that. She would have been happy for us." Her voice wobbled.
Every time, I think I have hit 'peak awful', the world cranks it up a notch. I knew this was coming the moment she met Carlotta. Deep down in my bones, I knew it.
She's convinced herself I only fled because I was afraid that Celestia would banish me to the moon. Or something similar.
I never realized she felt that way because we didn't do romantic things together. It was like... Well, Ivan would never ever in a million years do academic research.
But if he DID, then we would have done stuff like that.
Learning with Twilight was fun. And it made me feel like a real wizard, not just a dabbler.
Mind you, knowing what Carnelia could do to me, with a fraction of Celestia's likely powers, gave me extra incentive to run at lighting speed and never look back once I did panic.
"Celestia wasn't like what?" I asked her, though I knew the answer. But 'Samus Marcus' doesn't know what *I* know that Carlotta told her.
I need to find out if Carlotta has moved on because if she hasn't, I am going to have to knock myself unconscious before my inner guilt beats me to death.
PLEASE don't let her be waiting for me.
PLEASE.
"She wouldn't have tried to stop us being together, like Princess Carnelia did with Erik and Carlotta." Her eyes were heavy with sadness. Now I really wanted to die. Seeing people I like hurt hurts me. Stupid empathy.
I spun us around; Twilight is not as coordinated as Rarity, but she can cheat with her magic even better than Rarity, so we got a little fancy. I like getting fancy. We were now back to back, joined hand to hoof behind our backs. Then we came around to face each other again.
It was hard to see. I think I had sweat running down into my eyes. She looked at me and now she started to cry a little. "I know, it's terrible," she said. Then she told me the whole story I already knew.
It's fortunate no railing was nearby; I wanted to run. Run like the wind and not stop until I hit, say, Ylarum.
But I couldn't run. "You'll probably never see him again," I said softly. "I'm sure he misses you." No, no, don't feed her romantic dreams, dammit. "But you can at least look up at the same stars." DAMN YOU MOUTH SHUT UP!!!! "I don't know if he's much of a star gazer, though." Dammit, mouth, the goal is NOT to make her think about past times with him... with me. The him who was me. DAMMIT.
"I'm not... I'm not waiting," she said stubbornly. I wasn't so sure. "He has no way of knowing the truth. When I meet the right guy, I'll know. I'm just not... I'm very busy with my research and protecting Ponyville and studying Friendship and this quest and I'm not like Rarity who every stallion in the universe wants." She sounded jealous.
She paused and her eyes widened. "I'm not saying she's a tramp who just runs around with every man in sight! She's not like that, Marcus! That totally came out wrong!"
"Rarity is a woman of discretion and taste. I'm sure that only the very best will do for her," I told Twilight. "She could, though, teach you about flirting."
It would be for the best, really.
"I just... all the books have contradictory advice," Twilight said, frustrated. "I didn't even... I spent the whole Grand Gala wearing my horseshoes out shaking hooves."
"Celestia wanted you to greet the guests with her?" I asked.
"Yes. Like Sapphire. I hardly got to talk to Celestia at all until we kind of... wrecked the Gala," she said, deeply embarrassed.
I dipped her low, then spun her around and we spun out to where one hand and one hoof connected us. She wobbled, nearly falling but I caught her, aided by my own magic. "What? I can't imagine you wrecking a party."
She told me the whole story as I stared in shock. It was like the story of my life, compressed into a party. "I wish so much I could have seen that." I couldn't help laughing and now she laughed as well.
For now, I could just relax, enjoy the party, and forget everything.
**************
The music finished and now we saw Applejack. "Hey, Applejack," I said. She looked happier now. "How are you?"
"I think I just cut a SWEET deal with Don Diego," she said cheerfully. "He wants to come see my operation later, too."
"That's great. The Belcadizians love their fruit," I told her. "They make this dish with candied peaches, it's amazing."
"Twilight, mind if I take Marcus for a spin?" Applejack asked.
"It's fine but you have to ask him too," Twilight said.
"I would be happy to dance with you, Applejack," I told her.
Applejack ended up teaching me a Pony dance, done side by side. This made it harder to watch her and learn. But I was ready for a rest, anyway. Ponies are heavier than you'd think.
"Thanks for pointin' him my way, Marcus," Applejack said.
"Glad to help you," I told her.
"Even after I kinda chewed on you earlier," she continued ruefully. She side stepped and I did the same, thrice, then we went back the other direct, kicking with every other step.
"It's fine," I told her. "Friends never get along perfectly."
"Yeah, Rarity and I have some fights, sometimes," she said, shaking her head. "You like apples, right?"
"Doesn't everyone?" I said. "There's that crispness and they're easy to chew, but they don't just squish if you try to carry some with you," I told her.
She gave a happy sigh. "Don Diego really liked the apple I gave him too. I guess... you just hear some crazy stories about humans sometimes."
We now surged forward in a quick step, stopped, kicked, then surged back.
"Oh, they're probably all true. It's just... what defines humans is that we're not easily defined," I told her. "There are humans like each and every one of you and your friends and some who aren't like you at all," I continued.
I had trouble with the back rush and back kick, having only one set of legs. It's impossible for me to kick with both.
"Anyway, you get scared too easy and your weird nudity taboo is just kind of silly, but I hope I didn't hurt your feelings too much and I'm sorry," Applejack said.
"Well, I hope I didn't hurt yours either," I told her. "You fight bravely, you're hard working and you should be proud of yourself, whatever some aristocrats may think. I'm sure Celestia is proud of you."
"Thanks," she said, smiling. "I'm feelin' pretty good right now."
I could see Twilight dancing now with some stallion I didn't know. I felt a twinge of jealousy and stomped on it. Don't be stupid, brain, I told it. I was going to be happy for her if it killed me. And she'd probably never see the fellow again, anyway.
"GOOD," Applejack said, following my gaze, and I couldn't help but laugh.
"Is he handsome by pony standards?" I asked.
"Not bad. Looks kinda like one of those useless rich aristocrats, but he can dance and he's got his eyes focused on her, so she deserves a little fun," Applejack said.
That's when I got slapped in the face with a glove. "You disgusting Aalbanese bastard," the man said; he was a Belcadizian and quite drunk. "The last thing I need is for more of MY kin to die in one of YOUR wars!"
What the hell is... oh crap, I look Aalbanese in this body and I am dressed as one. "Sir, you mistake me for someone else. I swear on my mother's hat that I have not started any wars."
It does not count if it only involves goblins. And orcs. And gnolls. And... whatever those things were.
"YOU! You're all guilty!" He slapped me again. "I challenge you to a Duel Arcane!"
"Sir, I don't even know your name and I am willing to gamble that you do not know mine."
"You are the legendary Iron Count of Samuspolis! A notorious mercenary and despoiler of cities!" he said angrily. "One of Jagger's idiot warmongers!" ...
Applejack looked at me, then said to the man, "Did you escape from an insane asylum?"
"Shut your fat pony face!" he said pointing at her and now she looked mad.
"This body is all muscle," Applejack snapped at him, frowning. "I bet you can't even pull your own weight!"
"You're nothing but a pathetic *Earth* Pony. This is between wizards, so keep out!" the Elf said angrily.
Applejack actually growled and I saw her paw the ground once. This was going to get ugly if I can't defuse it.
Dammit, I don't recognize this guy but he is Belcadizian. "Who are you?"
"I am Don Carlos V, son of Don Carlos IV!," he said proudly.
I see his family doesn't know many names.
"We can duel another time," I told him. "I am on an important mission for Princess Celestia and so affairs of honor must wait." There's no point in trying to argue it out with a drunken fool who...
Someone is trying to use this fool against me for some reason. Why? I think Ukvarth saw through me somehow but how would this advance his goals? He clearly is trying to pressure Twilight to go crazy on the dragon. Why?
Dammit, I smell a mystery and I don't have time for a mystery!
On the other hand, the longer we stay on this ship, the longer I live before encountering the dragon.
Dammit.
"Yeah, what he said," Applejack said, backing me up. Though I could see she was still stiff and angry and probably wanted a fight.
"We can do it now or I can go to the Duchess and appeal to her authority to get what is MY RIGHT," he said.
Can he do that? Is this tech... I suppose as a diplomat, this ship is essentially under Glantrian law. I have no clue whether she can actually MAKE us duel. Make ME duel.
"Fine," I said. "Take it to the Duchess." Either she says no, or she says yes and then I am fucked.
"Can she order you two to fight?" Applejack asked, frowning deeply. "That ain't right."
"I don't even know, but he's drunk and he may just go straight to raining magical death if we don't play along," I said softly to her as he stormed off towards the Duchess.
Dammit, someone's trying to play me. Who? Why? Dammit!
We went before the Duchess and he rambled on about how I was trying to get everyone in Belcadiz killed in another of Jagger's wars, though he was kind of short on details about how this worked. The Aalbanese looked rather angry over his accusations, especially given he was short on details. Herr Sigismund especially looked displeased.
Was someone trying to get the two groups to slaughter each other? Ugh. Entirely possible. I tried detecting magic, but saw no sign of a charm spell. But of course, you don't need magic to plant ideas in the head of a bitter drunk.
"This man has NOTHING to do with my father, and we are not... whatever you think we are doing! This is a trade mission!," Herr Sigismund said angrily. "If you want a duel arcane, I will give you one!"
Twilight had joined us, but she looked a little overwhelmed. There's not a book for this and it's clear she's only studied politics abstractly.
Duchess Sapphire had a calm expression. Was she up to something? "Count Samus, you deny his accusations?"
"They're utterly ludicrous. I have never even seen Prince Jagger," I said. "Nor am I a warmonger. I am here on a mission for the throne of Equestria to deal with a marauding dragon. We only came up to the ship because Duchess Sapphire invited us."
"By unleashing it on US," Don Carlos said angrily. "You're going to buy it off to attack Belcadiz!"
Twilight frowned. "We are NOT. Equestria is the enemy of no nation!"
"Who told you that?" I asked him.
He looked flustered. "That's none of your business!"
"Given that someone lied to you in order to create a diplomatic incident, I think it is," I said firmly.
"Count Marcus, I need you to cast a spell," Duchess Sapphire said coolly, her cheerful party demeanor quite gone.
"What spell?" I asked.
"Any," she said.
I scooped a handful of change out, then made it dance in the air. "Tercinius' Invisible Hands," I told her. My telekinesis spell.
"You are an Arcaner by our law, and thus considered innocent until proven guilty. Further, you are part of a diplomatic mission," Duchess Sapphire began.
"He's not a registered part of their group," Don Carlos said. "And thus not covered by Diplomatic Immunity. Especially as he is not an Equestrian citizen."
"He IS part of our group," Rainbow Dash said, arms folded. Everyone was gathered around the dais, watching, though the band played on.
"I am quite sure that if we contact Celestia, she can fix the paperwork," Twilight said hesitantly.
"Diplomatic status does not radiate backwards in time," Don Carlos said. Okay, he is right on that one. Dammit.
Dona Carlotta now finally shoved her way through the crowd. "Don Carlos, stand down. You are here under father's authority and we are not here to fight with the Aalbanese."
"I am within my rights! And everyone knows you slut around with humans. Of course you're taking his side," Don Carlos said angrily.
I felt an intense surge of anger. I felt someone else's intense surge of anger. Several, in fact. Rarity and Twilight both looked ready to charge and trample Don Carlos.
Dona Carlotta's face went very cold and angry. "I am doing what my Aunt sent me here to do, which is to negotiate a trade agreement with Equestria. Something which will NOT be advanced by you forcing a member of an Equestrian diplomatic group into a duel over some stupid accusation you can't and won't prove," she said, her voice like ice.
Where is Don Diego? He ought to be here, but he isn't. Unless he plans to...
Oh, Immortals above, please don't let him do his usual crazy thing.
Dash was mumbling to herself about something, then glanced across the crowd at one of the Aalbanese, who I now saw watching this with huge concern. Why? He didn't look like the manipulator behind this but somehow this touched him especially. But he was just some guy with a mustache to me.
Admittedly, he did have a nice hat, though not a glorious one.
Blue Angel stepped up and began conferencing by whisper with Twilight.
Herr Ukvarth now began talking quietly to Herr Sigismund. The worried young man kept watching everything but kept looking at Dona Carlotta. Oh ho ho. Her new boyfriend. Good. I don't want her to wait for me. We can't ever be together and it's better she moves on.
But he really doesn't look worthy of her to me.
"My victory will be my proof," Don Carlos said.
The Duel Arcane cannot be forced on anyone, though refusing a duel may cause loss of status, if the foe was someone of equal status to yourself or fairly close or if the evidence is strong they are right. I could appeal to the court systems, but then I'd have to stay with them for the duration of the trial and there would be a ton of complications.
Given I am faking noble status, I can't afford that.
I studied Duchess Sapphire. She wants an out, ideally one which offends the least number of people. I think some of the Belcadizians agree with Don Carlos, at least on being angry at Dona Carlotta, and are looking for an excuse to beat up some humans. Why on earth are these three groups traveling together, anyway? It must advance some scheme of Sapphire or Princess Emerald.
Rarity suddenly exhaled with great force and her anger was gone. No, not gone. Contained. Hidden within a field of politeness. She still wasn't happy, but she was going to play the game.
"Don Carlos, are you bringing formal charges against a member of our delegation? Or merely pressing for a Duel Arcane, since your evidence is non-existent?" Rarity asked. "Unless you can provide actual evidence, you cannot levy a charge against an Arcaner. You can ask him for a Duel Arcane whenever you like, for whatever reason you like, but he has no obligation to accept it. Further, you might keep in mind that Libeling, Mocking, or Insulting an Arcaner is a crime and that if your accusation is proven false, there are dozens of witnesses to your crime. Perhaps you enjoy being whipped and beaten, however."
OOOH, burn. Go, Rarity, faster, kill, kill!
He scowled. "Of course not!"
"And, of course, you must have two witnesses. Do you, in fact, have two witnesses?" Rarity asked.
I suddenly wondered when and why she'd learned about Glantrian law.
Then I saw Twilight studying a book and her horn glowing softly and I smiled. Go, Twilight!
"She is indeed correct," Duchess Sapphire said. "I am certainly within my rights to dismiss your charges unless you can provide two witnesses. Do you have two witnesses?" She sounded relieved.
"You are a COWARD! Hiding behind ponies!" Don Carlos shouted at me. "Why won't you duel me?"
"In other words, you have no witnesses and no proof and no case that will last five minutes in court," Rarity said. She wasn't just talking to him but to everyone. Clearly, whoever set him up expected I would accept the duel or maybe even hoped a riot would break out over the accusations. If a trial date was set, the accusations would fester in people's minds, poisoning this trade mission.
But why wreck it?
Does someone want Belcadiz and Equestria to fight each other? Or likely Glantri and Equestria, as I doubt it would remain a private war. Not that either country could easily fight each other, given Darokin and Sind are in the way of them fighting each other. Belcadiz vs. Aalban? More likely, but why accuse an outsider? Is this pressure on me? Why? I don't exactly have much leverage.
Unless it's using me to get to Twilight, who is Celestia's favorite student. Is this someone's revenge? An effort to put pressure on Equestria?
Dammit, too many variables.
Don Carlos seethed drunkenly. "Quibbler! You're still a coward hiding behind others! Why won't you fight?"
Because only macho, retarded idiots fight pointless fights with people to prove their manliness, especially when it's pretty clear someone is playing the 'lets you and him fight' game.
"He's not a coward!," Rainbow Dash said angrily. Thank you, Rainbow Dash. "Kick his ass, Marcus!" Unthank you, Rainbow Dash. She began miming punching someone out.
"I have a mission which is more important than indulging your desire for violence," I said firmly. And I don't give a DAMN what you think. Ideally, I'd like to settle this in some way that doesn't end with the ship on fire and everyone falling and the Duchess swearing eternal vengeance on me.
I could tell that most of the crowd both thought Don Carlos was making stupid accusations but that I was a coward for not fighting him. This galled me.
Just not enough to be an idiot about it, especially since it was clear my current traveling companions mostly had little interest in seeing me fight this man. Other than Applejack, who clearly was angry over the fat pony and pathetic earth pony cracks. Which didn't make me happy but I am alive because you can't taunt me into things. And Dash, who clearly believes in me more than I do.
I am keenly aware that unless he just dabbled in magic to qualify as a gentleman, I am not going to beat him in a Duel Arcane.
Dona Carlotta whispered to Duchess Sapphire, then ran towards the stairs to below-decks, probably to find her father, who had better not be about to do what I think he is.
I can't see Pinkie anywhere. ANYWHERE.
I looked behind me quickly; no Pinkie.
UUUURGH.
Any Pinkie I can't see scares me more than one I can see.
"If you wish to satisfy your honor, we can satisfy you another time," Rarity said, her voice very calm in the way that always indicates control of emotions. Ironically, it can actually expose you aren't calm if you're *too* calm.
Yeah, life hates us, I know.
"So you're going to hide behind women and ponies," he said disgustedly.
FOOL. Did you notice WHO RUNS THIS SHIP?
Duchess Sapphire frowned deeply. "Do you have a problem with women and ponies, Don Carlos?"
He now realized he'd exposed himself. "No, of course not," he said firmly, trying to backpedal.
"As I would be happy to help you go home through the swamp if you do," she said coldly.
HAH!!!!!
"I just want this coward to face me, that the truth might be revealed!" he said angrily.
"The truth is that you're a drunken blowhard with too much clothing and a bad attitude," Applejack snapped at him. "I guess you hide behind clothing so no one can see how inadequate you are."
"Everyone knows Earth Ponies can't use magic! Shut your mouth and know your place, you lowly Earth Pony!" he snapped back at her.
Now a round of whispers went around, and Applejack looked even angrier.
Rarity whispered to Applejack intensely, while I began contemplating our options. A major problem is that by Glantri's definition, she's not a 'spell caster'. Earth pony magic is REAL, but it tends to be things like getting three times the yield of crops that a mundane farmer would or having the strength to pull tons of weight, and so on. It isn't spell magic or even Bardic magic. Pinkie qualifies, but even with the Element of Harmony...
Don Diego, finish showing up and turning this into a travesty already! We can use the chaos to escape before this all goes to hell. Mundaners have very few rights, and Applejack just engaged in what is technically 'mocking, libeling and... whatever the other thing is' towards an Arcaner. If she gets mad and attacks him, she could be sentenced to time in the Tower of Sighs, which is basically a prison haunted by the undead.
And of course, he'll want her to attack him so he can send her to jail.
"Earth Pony, Pegasus, Unicorn, it doesn't matter if you're all friends!" Rainbow Dash said, quite offended. "Applejack is my friend, and I trust and rely on her!" I heard a distant rumble of thunder; clouds were starting to gather. Oh this isn't going to be good. I could see the various Wonderbolts scattered around and none of them looked happy.
"You're nothing but a big mouthed snob," Ivan said hotly, surprising me. "Frankly, no one gives a DAMN what you think. You're nothing but a parasite who lives off other people's work while others work in the fields all day long so you can lounge around, sipping wine and cheating on your wives!" Ivan, this is not the time to remember your roots! We have to handle this delicately! You're going to antagonize an entire shipful of parasites!
"I only have ONE WIFE, I don't cheat on her, and you're not any different than this pony! Duchess Sapphire, are you going to stand for mundaners libeling arcaners?" Don Carlos demanded.
DAMMIT.
The crowd was frowning. They certainly wouldn't stand for it. Bunch of idiot snobs. Why is it that cultured refinement so often goes with being an arrogant bastard who lives off the work of others.
I suddenly realized I had my hand on Rarity's back to steady myself. Now, see, she is elegant and refined AND she works hard instead of living off others. I wish more people could be like that.
Unlike Ivan, I don't have fits of thinking I can change the world for the better, though. I can't even hold onto a DECENT HAT.
Do not covet Applejack's hat, I reminded myself. Not with everyone watching.
"Don Carlos, do you wish it to be known in Equestria that Belcadizians despise non-wizards? Do you think this will help you to get a good trade deal with a country mostly made up of non-wizards?" Rarity asked, shivering under my hand, but her voice calm, holding her position. "Is that what you all think of us? If so, why trade with us? Further, why should we bother to buy your goods if you do not respect us? If you are going to quibble about the precise paperwork of diplomatic immunity, you must expect us to do the same and we will not view your views on Ponies with any great favor. Perhaps you would like to learn the penalties for libel in our country. Do you think Celestia will view you and yours with favor for this? Or that she shares your views on who should rule? Might I remind you that three of the slots on the Royal Council are always reserved for Earth Ponies, because they are as important as we Unicorns?" It's a nine person council, three of each kind of pony.
I could see Twilight frantically working her way through several tomes and clearly still in mental contact with Rarity, while Spike assisted her.
I relaxed a little. Despite my growing terror, Rarity had things well in hand. I think my response to this would have been to scream and babble, though given time to PLAN, I could have done better.
Ivan was whispering softly to Applejack, who nodded to him, while Rainbow Dash looked ready to just explode. She clearly felt as tense as I did.
Duchess Sapphire paused, then had an odd little smile as she looked at Rarity. She now looked around like myself, assessing the crowd, which was now clearly unsettled. Had they not even thought about... of course not. Glantrians think they are the BEST of all societies.
Mind you, so do the Equestrians.
Every society thinks itself the best, but the Glantrians... It's like this. This is a country where the thinkers rule. Where the people who get kicked around and told they are 'weak' and 'nerds' and 'pussies' run the place by their arcane power. Where those who are strong of body don't rule the show like in so many countries. Glantrians often lack wisdom but they aren't stupid. (Mind you, the combination of low wisdom and high arcane power gets pretty messy.)
Unfortunately, a lot of them respond by turning into thugs and bullies who rely on *arcane* rather than *physical* might. They decide their brains make them destined to rule, etc, etc. You know how it goes.
They end up despising non-spellcasters and their laws enforce that. It's why I couldn't stay... okay, one of many reasons I couldn't stay. If a place craps on my friends like Ivan, I can't stay if they're going to be treated that badly.
Not that I have many close friends, but it's the principle of the thing.
Several other Belcadizians were trying to whisper to Don Carlos. Others were glaring at us angrily or at the ponies or at the Aalbanese. The various Glantrian Ponies looked pretty tense, though they all kept silent. I guess they were going to let Duchess Sapphire lead. Understandably.
Don Carlos drew a wand. SHIT. He's going to go axe-crazy now and given this place is full of people who can easily level this ship, we are all going to catch fire and die.
I could feel Rarity tense more through my hand on her back and everyone began reaching for implements. Wizards can heighten their powers through the use of wands, staves, rods, and other items. I could if I had one. I've had a fair number and lost them all. Helga has this really nice staff which amplifies her ability to do thunder and lightning magic.
Unicorn Ponies just use their horn for the same purpose. And their Cutie Mark. Given the Elements of Harmony seem to work like an implement, I expect...
And then there was a twang and the wand flew out of Don Carlos' hand.
Ahh, here he is.
There was a male elf clad in black pants, a black cake hat (a short cylinder, flat-topped, shaped like a cake) with a wide brim, a black buttoned shirt, black gloves and a black raccoon mask (the kind which basically covers the region around your eyes and noting else). The only thing on him that wasn't black was that he wore a badge which depicted a circle with a broad range of colors in it like a spectrum. It represents a planar portal, one of the type known as 'color pools'. He was dark skinned with short black hair and a nicely done mustache, and he had a rapier on one hip, a whip on the other and a crossbow in his hands with a quiver on his back. He stood upon... the pole things that jut sideways from masts and you hang the sails on them.
Next to him stood a pink pony with a wavy pink mane, wearing exactly the same outfit as him, except that she had a pie badge, had a spatula instead of a rapier, some sort of icing spreader thing instead of a whip and a pie balanced on each of her forehoofs as she stood unnaturally bipedally.
Words fail me.
"MANUEL OF THE PLAINS!" the Belcadizians shouted as one in utter shock.
See, here's the thing. As you probably have guessed, it's Don Diego in black, wearing a damn raccoon mask. And yet, NO ONE CAN TELL. No one. I have seen this man give Prince Innocenti di Malipietra a wedgie and somehow not die horribly by poison because di Malipietra couldn't find him to take revenge.
He puts on this ludicrous outfit and rides around on his Pony ally, Platinum, avenging injustices and righting wrongs and helping out oppressed peasants and basically twisting the nose of every noble in Glantri and GETS AWAY WITH IT.
Okay, maybe I am a little jealous.
But how on Mystara can they NOT RECOGNIZE HIM?
It's a freaking raccoon mask. You can see his mustache and his hair and...
I can't get away with a cheesy disguise like that, so how can *he*?
"And I am champion of justice Caramelita of the Pies!," the pink pony said. If that isn't Pinkie Pie, I would eat my hat if I had one. "Who stands for caring AND sharing!"
Every pony in the place stamped their hoof with approval, to my surprise. Some of them began cheering her.
Herr Sigismund began giving frantic orders to his men; he clearly knows what usually comes after this. Herr Ukvarth buried his face in his hands, clearly frustrated. And Duchess Sapphire... grinned. Oh dear.
"What a thrilling, well-dressed heroine," Rarity said, clearly admiring. She... surely she can tell it is Pinkie.
A quick glance showed that somehow, none of them could tell. Except Applejack, who had a hoof over her mouth to keep from laughing. She saw me and she winked at me. Are they putting on an act?
It wouldn't surprise me if Pinkie had done this before.
Of course she has.
Don Carlos started to reach for another wand and took a pie to the face and fell down.
"Someone needs a hug!" 'Caramelita' announced. "Platinum! HUG STRIKE!"
Platinum, a silver-coated, black maned unicorn pony wearing a raccoon mask and black boots (and nothing else, unlikely the heavily clad ponies attendant at the party), now rushed through the crowd and pounced on Don Carlos, hugging him and laughing loudly. His ACTUAL name is 'Silver Fork' and he is Don Diego's butler. He somehow turns his Cutie Mark into a platinum coin instead of a silver fork when he's 'in disguise'.
Another Belcadizian now went for a rod, only to get a pie to the face from 'Caramelita'. "Now, now! Someone else needs a hug!"
"Hug time now!" somepony shouted and rushed at him. It was a middle-aged mare I didn't know, wearing a fancy blue and green satin dress.
Then someone shouted, as I knew they would, "PIE FIGHT!", opening up with a barrage from the snack bar.
"YEE HAW!" Applejack shouted, opening fire with apples and then 'Manuel of the Plains' and 'Caramelita swooped down and food began flying everywhere. Once I saw Duchess Sapphire hurl a plate of candies at someone, I knew that chaos would inevitably ensue.
Was ensuing, in fact.
Rarity looked at the growing anarchy. "Oh dear," she said. "I think we've caused a diplomatic incident," she said, sounding guilty.
"No, you avoided one," Duchess Sapphire said, then passed her a plate of those Belcadizian swirlcakes. "Let's see your legendary archery skills, dear. I think the dry cleaning bill is going to be horrendous, but better cleansers than blood, right?" ...
Rarity smiled. "Of course. Marcus, will you be kind enough to mark my targets for me?"
Okay, I surrender. You win again, Diego, Pinkie. I picked the four snootiest looking aristocrats I could find, then I cast a spell, St. Tarastia's Fire. I think the Shadow Elves originally invented this one; it basically limns a target in totally harmless 'flame'. This makes it easy to find people in the dark and helps with hitting them with ranged attacks.
Rarity hit each of them in the face with a series of quick shots. This of course, led to counter-fire and we ended up drenched in wine with bits of fruit all over us and then someone lobbed MEATLOAF at us. NOT ON A WHITE SUIT!
I staggered, covered in red sauce, bacon, beef, and cheese. My suit. The beautiful suit Rarity bought me with her own money and now it's a ruined soggy mess. And Rarity's beautiful dress was now a soggy mess as well and there was a chunk of cheese-bread-meat mess on her tiara. I brushed it off and eyed the crowd.
Someone was going to PAY FOR THIS.
One of the Aalbanese had a MINIATURE CATAPULT; as I watched, he dropped chicken parmesan on Fluttershy, who was busy dodging attacks. "Please, stop the violence before someone gets hurt," she said, then got hit. Yelping, she fell down into the scrum.
"Rarity," I said, limning him in fire. He stared at himself, clearly knowing what this meant. He was, like most Aalbanese men, dark haired with a mustache, wearing a white suit like mine. "I think he needs a few splashes of COLOR to liven up that white suit."
"I agree one hundred percent, darling," she said. A dozen shrimp rose into the air, dipped themselves in the half a dozen dips which sat next to them on a now abandoned server's tray, and then they flew in a swarm at the man. I noticed an ENTIRE BOWL of dip... no, three... followed the same trajectory, and I saw Twilight concentrating. She gave me the hoof sign, grinning.
Whoever that man was, he went DOWN and went down HARD.
Fluttershy rose out of the scrum, wobbling, only to get hit by an entire loaf of Averoignese style bread, which had been split and buttered and covered with garlic, briefly turning her into a sandwich.
I could totally go for an Averoignese style soup and sandwich right now.
Not made of pony!
You know what I *mean*.
Determinedly, Fluttershy took to the sky again. "Violence is bad! Stop the madness!" She dripped food and sauces now and was a hideous mess.
She would have been hit by an entire pizza, except Rainbow Dash flew down and interposed herself, then hurled an entire tray of Belcadizian burritos at the perpetrator, a green pony who now went down.
"Sorry, Fluttershy," Rainbow Dash said to her. "But this is war! And war means..." A tomato to Rainbow Dash's face. "CHAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGEEEEEEE!" She zoomed at whoever did it, who I couldn't see.
Trust me, Fluttershy, we're getting off easy, except for our dry cleaning bills.
Fluttershy looked around, then got hit with a tomato in the face even as she opened her mouth. Then she saw someone's little yappy pet dog take a Belcadizian swirlcake to the face. Her eyes crossed and when they returned to normal, Fluttershy shouted, "ENOUGH! PETS OF GLANTRI! RISE UP! IT IS TIME FOR YOU TO BE FREE!"
ACK.
***************
Fortunately, the ship's actual PILOT was under decks in the control room, so the ship didn't crash, but wow, cleaning this thing up is going to be epic.
Fortunately, most of the pets of Glantri ran to their masters and hid, but the smarter ones had joined in on the anarchy, now at Fluttershy's command.
My suit was all the colors of the rainbow and Rarity and the other ponies looked like a buffet bar. I was utterly exhausted but it was a good exhausted. Rarity was flopped down next to me, both of us breathing hard. We'd used a lot of magic. I wanted a nap BADLY.
"Justice has been done!," 'Manuel' shouted. "Platinum, to me!"
Platinum ran over and 'Manuel' and 'Caramelita' got onto his back and then galloped across the deck, leaping off the side and vanishing in a spray of silvery dust. A rather flashy teleport, I assume, though given Don Diego's skills, they may have just plane shifted.
"Wow, Pinkie missed the whole fight," Rainbow Dash said. "She is gonna be SO unhappy." ...
"I know, it's her sort of thing," Rarity said.
"It's nice to see heroic ponies in other countries too," Twilight said.
"Uhh... that was Pinkie," Applejack said, cocking her head and looking at Twilight.
"I'm pretty sure that 'Caramelita' was Pinkie," I said.
"No way," Rainbow Dash said, shaking her head. "Pinkie never wears black."
"It didn't look like Pinkie," Ivan said. "You get some weird ideas in your head, Marcus."
Dammit, Ivan, not you too!
I caught Applejack's gaze, then shrugged. I gave up fighting on the whole 'your father is Manuel of the Plains, no really' thing a long time ago.
"Even I think we need a bath," Applejack said, looking at herself. She was a squishy, sticky mess. We all were.
"Everyone will, but I will see to quarters for you tonight; you can teleport back to where we got you in the morning," Duchess Sapphire said. "There is no way I can send you back to the swamp like this."
"Thank you," I said. "I am very sorry about this."
"We avoided the total wreck of the mission and it's clear some tensions needed deflating and lessons had to be learned," she said. "Like how Don Carlos needs to be sent back home accidentally on purpose."
I like how she thinks.
****************
This is how Ivan and I ended up having a nice hot bath, though oddly, though I could hear attendants in the other baths, we didn't have any. On the other hand, we were in a fairly small one, while the others were crowded with ponies, Belcadizians, or Aalbaneese.
I was busy trying to clean my back when to my surprise, someone began scrubbing it. I was fighting the urge to scream and flee when Don Diego said amiably, "It's just me, Samus Marcus."
"You missed the pie fight and two great heroes," Ivan said.
Dammit, Ivan, I just tried to tell you it was Diego and Pinkie!!!
"I always seem to miss Manuel of the Plains," Don Diego said sadly as he scrubbed my back. I twitched, wishing I could have beautiful elf maidens instead of a... okay, he isn't that old for an Elf but I'd rather have women.
That being said, a clean back IS important to me.
"Why does everyone else have attendants and we don't?" Ivan asked.
"I believe the blue-skinned pegasus told them you were easily embarrassed and needed privacy because you were human," Don Diego said. "So I thought I would be a good host and come tend to your needs." He sounded very amused.
DAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSHHHHH!!!!!!
Ivan laughed. "Marcus is easily embarrassed."
I began doing my hair with Diego's help. "Where's Silver Fork?" I asked.
"Helping to tend to the needs of your ladyfriends, the Elements of Harmony," Diego said amiably. "It seems he is always a big hit with the ladies. I keep telling him he ought to settle down, but he tells me he cannot marry until he outdoes the glories of the mighty Platinum."
"He should probably set more realistic goals, that's like saying you won't marry until you have the head of three Grand Wyrms," Ivan said. He was washing his hair now.
Is he fucking with me or does the universe just hate me?
Of course, the answer could be 'both'.
"I have arranged for fresh clothing for you tomorrow," Diego said. "Though I fear the swamp will muss it quickly."
"So do I," I told him. "And thank you."
We chatted amiably while my brain slowly worked on melting to slag.
***************
"Don Diego has been kind enough to put us up as an apology for Don Carlos' behavior," Twilight said. "However, we will have to go three to a room with one sleeping on a magical air balloon on the floor."
"A magical air balloon?" I asked, confused. I was wearing actual pajamas, thanks to Don Diego. Black with silver stripes. They fit me poorly, but I didn't care. I feel like a REAL PERSON now.
"They are like a flat, mattress shaped balloon. Don Diego assures me they are very comfortable," she said.
These must be new; I slept on a cot a few times in Belcadiz but never a balloon.
"Well, how about me, Ivan, and Pinkie," Applejack said. "Then you, Marcus, Rarity, Sp... no wait, that's four."
Twilight Sparkle looked at Ivan. "You fine with sleeping with Pinkie and Applejack?"
"Earth ponies forever," he said deadpan and high-fived Applejack and Pinkie at the same time. ...
"I can take Spitfire and Soarin'," Dash said. "Then... oh wait, that leaves five. Ummm..."
"They'll leave with us but they have quarters," Twilight said. "And I think they're going to pull a watch shift with some of the other Wonderbolts."
"So, me, Twilight, Rarity, and then Dash, Fluttershy, and Marcus," Spike said quickly.
"Marcus should be with the unicorns," Fluttershy said hesitantly. "If we're going by type."
Twilight paused and looked at me. "Marcus..."
"I can sleep with whoever will be most convenient," I said. "As you must have seen, I don't sleep naked."
"Twilight, why don't you take Marcus and Dash? I can use Spike and Fluttershy's help on something before bed," Rarity said.
"YES!" Spike said.
I put a hand over my mouth long enough to resist laughing, then Twilight said, "Okay. Marcus can help me with something too."
"Hah! We'll have the best slumber party!" Rainbow Dash said.
Twilight's eyes suddenly lit up.
Rarity and Applejack looked at each other and grinned and I felt my stomach curdle.
Rainbow Dash looked at me. I looked at her. For a moment, our minds moved as one. 'Uh oh.'
****************
In my long life, I can say that I have never actually done up a woman's hair with curlers. Or had mine done up. It's really not long enough for it, though it's not cut extremely short.
"I hope we're doing this right, I am going by memory because I didn't bring the book," Twilight said as she worked on my hair, while I tried to do Dash and Dash tried to do Twilight. This was difficult since she had to do it with her teeth and with clumsy hoof grips. Admittedly, Ponies have insanely nimble mouths and teeth. It was clear Twilight was the only one of us who actually knew how to do this.
"I am sure it will be fine as long as we have fun," I said. This is not, in fact, my idea of fun, but I owe Twilight and she's so enthusiastic about this, how can I say no?
Also, Spike cannot strangle me in my sleep if he's with Rarity and Fluttershy. Working on... whatever it is.
"Man, so humans even have special clothing for sleeping?" Dash asked me, studying my outfit.
"And it's different for men and women," I said.
"Why? It's not like it's not easy to tell which is which," Dash said.
"A woman's body is contoured differently," I told her. I now finished her hair, hoping I did it right.
Twilight finished mine, while Dash fumbled with Twilight's hair.
"Yeah, I noticed all the elf and human women have giant breasts. Don't those get in the way?" Dash asked.
"They make nice pillows," I said. "And typically a woman sleeps on her back or side if it's too much to be comfortable. Isn't that normally how ponies sleep?"
Twilight's eyes crossed and she mumbled.
"Sorry," Dash said. "I'm trying to be gentle."
I helped her with it. She would have been fine if she had fingers.
Dash sighed. "I'm sorry, Rarity could do this really well."
"We can't all be Rarity," I said. "Though it wouldn't hurt if more people were like her."
Dash grinned at me for some reason. "I...umm... you met Soarin', right?"
"Briefly," I said. "He seems a decent fellow."
Twilight nodded. "Okay... we've done each other's hair... oh yes, time for our faces."
"Faces?" Dash said nervously.
"Facial cleanser creams... which I don't have," Twilight said. "I already borrowed Rarity's curlers... I hate to keep taking her stuff."
"We can just wash each other's faces," I said. Though really, it's clean enough.
Dash looked slightly suspicious but relaxed when we carefully scrubbed each other's face.
I feel like I am twelve and someone's sister.
But Twilight basically skipped childhood. I can't help but want to indulge her a little when she wants to do this.
I could have had BEAUTIFUL ELF WOMEN doing this to me if not for you, Dash. But you were just trying to help me.
Dammit.
"We should shave your stubble," Twilight said.
Twilight, holding a knife next to my throat, and if she... and she... No, don't be afraid, she doesn't know, can't show fear...
"Okay, we'll leave it. You'll look good with a beard," Dash said quickly.
Damn my poor self-control.
"No, I trust you two to shave me," I said. "I didn't even realize I have stubble." It being hard to shave in a SWAMP.
Dash lathered me up and Twilight said, "Don't worry, Mother always helped Father shave and she taught me how to do this so one day... I could do it for... friends." Her voice choked up a moment.
"Did you ever... with Erik?" Dash asked, then put a hoof over her mouth.
"No, he always shaved in his chambers," Twilight said. "I mean, I would have, but he never asked and always kept his face carefully shaven and in general, he was well groomed, except the times he woke up on my floor or in the library."
She breathed in and out and began to shave me as I tried to avoid total panic, remaining very still. Dash put a hoof on my shoulder. I was sitting on the floor, by the way.
"Don't worry," Twilight said. "This is going to be fine." She was sweating, however, as the blade moved slowly along my face. Once it left contact, her control was better and she easily cleaned it off.
We all started when a maid said, "I can do that, senorita." We hadn't even noticed her enter in her black uniform; she was Belcadizian.
"No, no, I can do it," Twilight said. "I have to... I need to be able to do this." Her voice was tight and urgent.
The maid looked at me nervously; I was too paralyzed with fear to move. Finally, I tried to blink at her 'HELP ME'.
Dash cleared her throat. "If she... I mean..."
"It's fine," my traitor mouth said. "Her mother taught her how to do this," I told the maid, who looked dubious.
Had she... I guess her job is to be ready to serve. But I will have to remember that. I'd forgotten what it's like. The help ALWAYS knows more than you think.
"Rarity," Dash began.
"I can do this," Twilight said, determined, then began shaving me again. She nicked me once and looked mortified and the maid quickly applied a little cloth and held it until I stopped bleeding. "I... Marcus..."
"Go on," I said. "Make your mother proud."
My mother would probably beat me to death with a chair. I think. I haven't seen my parents in a very long time. Twilight probably should have seen her parents more than she does, but I know they're important to her.
Twilight's stance shifted a little, and now she shaved me with determination more than fear, which made things go smoother. When she was done, the maid cleaned my face. "Very smoothly done," she said to Twilight. "I will clean this for you," she said, taking the razor.
"Thank you," Twilight said warmly to her.
The maid smiled and left.
"Better," I said. "Thank you, Twilight."
She beamed brightly.
"Okay, now... I think ghost stories are next. Or is it brandy?"
"How about brandy AND ghost stories?" I said. "But not much brandy." NEVER getting drunk around Twilight again.
************
"And so he crept through Prince Brannart's tower," I said to Dash and Twilight, who were leaning forward, eyes wide, as we sat in the near-dark with only a small flame in the palm of my hand for light. "He could see an unholy blue light shining from under a door. Curiosity, greed, fear, all warred within him. It could be... it WAS powerful magic, but powerful magic can be DANGEROUS."
"The Second Precept," Twilight said breathlessly. "Use too much magic at once and you will destroy yourself."
My magical education was too informal to have any precepts beyond 'magic is useful.'
"Did he open it?" Dash squeaked out.
Of course, I did. FOOLISHLY.
"His curiosity drove him on. He had to know what laid beyond, what secrets of magic he might find beyond the door, so he studied it carefully; it was slightly ajar, and so he cracked it open," I said, gesturing as if opening a door and peeking through it.
Twilight said, "Was it tomes? I bet there were tomes." Her voice was excited and nervous at once.
"CURSED tomes," Dash said spookily. Twilight shivered.
"The lab was well appointed with a long array of beakers, vials, flasks, tubes, coils, oil lamps and candles, as well as every sort of chemical one might need, and powdered gemstones and rare metals and rare earths, finely ground. But at the heart of the lab table was a finely cut sphere of bluish-gray crystal, set with many facets on a golden stand; it sparkled, casting the eerie blue light. Near it, an aged tome, bound in leather with gold clasps, sat open, words of power on every page."
"Hah! Yes! Books!" Twilight said triumphantly.
"Does it turn him into a chimera?" Dash asked, shivering. "And then his heads turn on each other and he dies?" ...
That's actually better than my ending.
"He began to creep forward, but then a figure came out of the shadows," I said, rising up so I towered over them. The flame in my hand cast unnatural shadows up my face and they shivered. I now made my voice vibrate with a little magic. "He wore a finely made light blue tunic of cloth of gold, wrapped around him, with a belt of deep blue, and around his waist and down to his knees he wore a traditional red and black checkered kilt, and at his hip, a long blade of the Klantyre style."
"A what?" Dash asked.
"A skirt for men," I told her, though it weakened the build up.
"His skin was withered and dry like paper, his hands almost like claws as they clutched the vials in his hands, one with blue, the other with red powder. But his head... though he bore a regal golden crown set with opals and rubies, his eyes shone with the same unholy light as the gem, blazing like blue-litten flame in dark grottoes, and his skin was stretched so tight over his skull as to show it clear as day and his teeth were yellow and black. It was Prince Brannart McGregor, THE LICH OF KLANTYRE!"
They both howled and jumped into the corner, clutching each other, shivering, as I closed in on them relentlessly, making my eyes glow blue. "He opened his mouth with a feral grin and his voice was like dust."
"What did he say?" Dash said frantically.
"Would you like some candy?" I said, holding out my hand with two peppermints.
Dash hit me with a pillow and we segued into the pillow fight.
*************
"I wasn't scared, you know," Dash said, trying to look tough.
I was. Brannart scared me shitless. Enough that he just made me run naked through the streets and hocked my possessions instead of killing me. While I heard him LAUGHING the whole time.
Never taking a job in Klantyre again.
Twilight yawned. "We should sleep. We have a long day tomorrow."
"I want to sleep on the air mattress," Dash said.
"I was going to take it," I said.
"Please?" she asked. "I am REALLY curious if it's as nice as my clouds back home."
Sleeping in the same bed as Twilight seems... well, it's not nice to sleep in the same bed as someone you are lying about your identity to them.
But Dash... made these 'PLEASE' eyes at me.
"Okay," I said. Since I have no reason I can actually EXPLAIN for why I should sleep on the floor. Or in another room. Or possibly another continent. I hear Skothar is nice this time of year.
"You don't mind, right?" Twilight said. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable."
"I'm fine," I said. "It would be silly if you could shave me but not sleep near me."
She relaxed. "There's a lot worse than quicksand if you panic on this ship." She got on the bed on the far side by the wall.
I winced. "I know."
"Yeah, I think he'd have the Element of Fear if we had another one," Dash said, then looked embarrassed. "I'm sorry, that came out bad."
"I have had a scary life of facing monsters, seeing people die and sometimes thinking I would die," I said.
Dash stretched out on the 'air mattress'. "Okay, this is TOTALLY sweet." She paused. "Uh..."
"That's right, you have seen people die," Twilight said softly. "I hope..."
"I do worry about you all dying," I confessed. They're skilled fighters and Rarity... she and Twilight were *very* effective. But in some ways, they're still so innocent. "I've seen a lot of death. But I can't seem to ever settle down successfully. Something always goes wrong."
"Well, I'm confident this will go well," Twilight said as I now got into bed, under the sheets. "This is a nice soft bed," she mumbled, her voice going groggy.
Distantly, I heard Pinkie shout something about a naked pony party.
Twilight's eyes widened. "What on Mystara?"
"Let them riot, we need our sleep," I said.
"So is Ivan... an Earth Human?" Dash asked.
"We have different divisions but he would likely be one if he was polymorphed into a pony," I said. "I would be a Unicorn and..." Can't mention Helga. "I met flying humans in Floating Ar, in Alphatia."
I ended up telling them about Floating Ar until we all fell asleep. Or they did. I laid there, worrying somehow my tattoo would start shining with a blue, unholy light, revealing me.
Eventually, sleep took me. I dreamed about everyone setting me on fire and hurling me off the boat. Delightful.
***********
Dash got up early and went out to cavort with the Wonderbolts, I think. Or at least, when I eventually woke up, she was gone, but her bed HAD been slept in. Twilight was still clonked out, mumbling about ten more minutes.
I left her to her sleep and rose, doing some stretching. That had been a very comfy bed but I often contort myself into weird shapes.
Twilight now said something totally incoherent.
"What?" I said.
She floated a glass of water over, then drank from it and sat up and stretched. "So much nicer than sleeping on the ground," she said. "Or worse, my floor."
"Doesn't Spike usually ensure you don't stay on the floor?"
"Yes, but usually that's because he wakes up before me and puts me in bed." She flopped over, then made herself sit up "I... Spike..." She frowned, then sighed and fumbled her way out of bed, stretching as well. "I, look, Spike kind of...
"NO," Pinkie said, suddenly rolling out from under the bed.
HAS SHE BEEN THERE ALL NIGHT?
Twilight jumped. "But..."
"No, no, no," Pinkie said, now rising. "See you all at breakfast!" She trotted out of the room.
Twilight sighed. "Okay, then."
I don't get it.
"Let's go get some breakfast."
"I need to change into something other than pajamas," I told her. "You go ahead," I continued. "Thank you for the sleepover." Always thank people for everything, even if you didn't want it. Not that I...
I enjoy spending time with Twilight and some parts of it were fun. But every moment I spend with her is a moment where my secrets may come out and I may be buried in an unmarked grave.
"Oh yes, I don't want to violate your privacy," she said. "I know it's important to you." She stumbled towards the door. "You're braver than you think, you know," she said softly. "Don't be afraid. We'll back you to the end. Like Rarity did."
"I am VERY grateful to her, but I don't... I am rather poor at the moment, and it's hard for me to repay her," I told Twilight. "And you helped me too. I could see you feeding her information."
"It was very cool," Twilight said, sounding proud of herself. Then she frowned. "Glantri is really unfair to non-spellcasters."
"I know," I told her. "It's just... well, you know how it is for people who like books, like to study. People think you're weird, make fun of you, beat you up." I sighed. "And you know magic and the temptation to abuse it."
"I know," Twilight said. "It's hard to know when I should use my powers and when not. When people will like it and when they'll.. think I'm all snobby and full of myself and showing off too much." She studied the space under the bed; I glanced, but I didn't see anything there, not even dust.
"You should write a letter to Celestia. I'm sure she has that problem too. And she knows what Glantrians are like."
"I should," she said, smiling. "I would have sent one but Spike was helping Rarity." She frowned a moment, then sighed. "Anyway, thanks for listening to me talk."
"I've had the same problem, so I understand," I told her. "We can talk about it later."
She nodded and smiled and ran off.
I got changed. It is a huge problem. Too many people get jealous when others are different or better, but mock anyone who isn't the same as them or up to their level.
But what can we do about it?
I got changed and went out to have breakfast.
************
Twilight kept looking at Rarity, looking nervous, but Rarity, though utterly groggy, seemed in good spirits. So was Spike and Fluttershy. I decided not to pry for fear that Pinkie would somehow rise out of my waffle and stop me. Belcadizian waffles with honey and syrup, VERY good, by the way.
Don Diego pressed a clean set of armor and underwear on me; I was very grateful, though surprised. But the real gift...
Rarity now gave me an archer's cap, made of red felt with a green ribbon held in place by six emeralds. That's right, EMERALDS. A red feather was tucked into the ribbon. It was beautiful. "Rarity, that's wonderful," I said, putting it on my head. "Now I feel bad I have nothing to offer you."
"It's fine," she said. "I know how much you love hats."
She'd donned a stylish white and black hat herself, though I suspect the swamp will soon add green and brown to it.
"I will get you something nice once I am in a position to do so," I told her. I touched my hat and got that wonderful feeling. HAT.
I felt nerves de-tangling already.
"I can face the world!," I said proudly.
"But how will the world face you?" Rarity said, smiling.
How indeed. Nothing can stop a well-dressed man. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book Two: Dragons of Swamp Glooming | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 2: Dragons of Swamp Glooming
By John Biles
***************
We got teleported back to the rock by the Duchess and several of her ponies. Rarity, Spike, and I all wanted to dig down and get the gems, but we got outvoted, since there was the whole Dragon problem still not dealt with. They promised we could come back afterward.
I wish, I think we can be sure that this will probably end with us falling from the sky into the Broken Lands. Though being there with Twilight and Dash would probably let us finally find that damn tower again, break back into it, and FINALLY get that crown.
Assuming the crown actually exists, anyway.
Long story.
Rarity and Twilight went off to one side and talked about... something. They were excited about it, anyway. I decided it best to assume 'girl talk' and just move on.
Ivan and Applejack were talking about fertilizer. FERTILIZER. What is with him?
I was just ambling along, listening to Dash and Soarin' clumsily flirt, while Spitfire scouted ahead. "So, you're like a unicorn human, right?" Soarin' asked me.
Close enough. "Yes," I told him.
"Aaah," he said sagely.
"And Ivan is like an Earth pony," Dash said.
Soarin' looked at him and nodded in agreement.
Oddly enough, there are three major groups of humans on this world, though they all have the same aptitudes and skills. It's all superficial. Ivan and I are both of Neathar descent; they're the dominant group on this continent, Brun. If Carlan of the Five Veils is right, humans, elves, dwarves, gnomes, and all other mammalian bipeds come from a common ancestor, though. Lizardmen seem to have been created by the Carnifex as a slave race; the Carnifex were basically... really huge lizard-men. All we know of them is myths and rumors.
Mind you, some Elves claim to be related to Dragons but I am VERY dubious.
Seriously, look at Spike. You get an Elf from that? No. Nothing against Spike, but he's no proto-Elf.
Suddenly, I wondered why Spike had no wings. Do they grow in later?
Very strange.
Curiosity suddenly hit me. "So where did Ponies come from?" I asked.
Soarin' stared at me in confusion.
Dash blinked, cocked her head, and said, "When one pony loves another pony..."
"No, I know what sex is," I said, feeling a little aggravated. "Where did the very FIRST ponies come from?" I asked.
Rainbow Dash scrunched up her face. "Dammit, all I remember is something about chickens and eggs, but there's no way a chicken gave birth to the first ponies."
"I don't know about origins. I know we first came to Equestria when Orcs enslaved our ancestors and forced us to help them wipe out the humans who originally lived there." Soarin' shivered. "It must have been terrible then, but eventually, Celestia led us to freedom. I'm sorry, I never studied history much; I was always thinking about flying when we were supposed to learn things." That's pretty much what I knew about it.
Fluttershy now dropped down and made an odd noise. "Hello," I said to her. "Going to weigh in on this?"
"Like humans, the influence of the powerful magics of Mystara gradually turned some Ponies sentient," Fluttershy said. "This gave them a huge advantage in surviving the monsters which were everywhere and still are. They had more kids than ordinary ponies and horses. The Blackmoorians sped this up with their magic, and created Unicorns and Pegasi from Earth Ponies. There are various other kinds of Ponies around the world as well, like the Sea Ponies who live underwater." She sounded oddly like Twilight to me. "And the deadly Shadow Ponies, corrupted by Entropy." She shivered and studied the woods.
We were slogging along muddy ground as we went through the woods. There were lots of rivulets of water and patches of rocky, dry ground, higher than the rest.
We then got into a discussion of the Elf-Dragon question which drew in Spike and Twilight and went on for a long time. I found it fascinating, but I will spare you the details beyond noting that Spike couldn't make up his mind if he wanted to be related to Elves or not.
And we kind of drove off Dash and Soarin', who went to go help scout, which I felt a little bad about afterwards.
Not bad enough to stop the discussion, though, which I greatly enjoyed.
"I think we're all descended from cupcakes," Pinkie finally said.
"You do not actually think that," Twilight said, a little chidingly.
Of course she believes that. I'm sure she has a chart which shows how cookies developed from gumdrops, then some of them turned into cupcakes, which led to cakes and so on.
"I know but I felt I had to contribute something," Pinkie said cheerfully. "We need to argue geology."
I was initially unclear WHY we needed to argue geology, but hey, why not? So we switched to discussing the question of what created the plateau which is at the heart of Equestria. To my surprise, Pinkie knew all about that and in fact basically was able to school myself and Twilight on the issue, to Twilight's embarrassment. Rarity pitched into this conversation, also knowing more than I would have expected, though in retrospect, I would think her talent with gems inspired her to study the issue.
"In conclusion, I'm pretty sure some Immortal intervened, because if you study the strata, the rock was pushed straight up in an unnatural way," Pinkie said very seriously. "There were earthquakes in the period of plateau formation, but the rocks should either be folded or one set of strata thrust upwards over another. There's no slopes and it's not due to erosion of weaker rocks, the way you'd expect with normal buttes or mesas. Normal buttes and mesas don't thrust up, rather, the ground level around them was worn *down*. But this plateau was clearly thrust up on a huge scale."
How does a baker and dancer know so much about rocks, anyway?
"But not Celestia," I said.
"Oh no, the plateau was around for hundreds of years before Ponies arrived and Celestia didn't show up for hundreds more," Pinkie said. "Today, Earth Ponies work hard to keep the plateau intact, because otherwise it will slowly erode away and that would get *messy*." Her voice returned to normal on the last word and her whole stance changed. She'd been a little tense the whole time, I now realized. But now she let herself go.
"Are your parents geologists?" I asked.
"Rock farmers," Pinkie said. "Hideously boring, though necessary. I left the farm in search of something more fun. My parents are Kagyar-worshipers and you know how that is."
Kagyar is the Immortal patron of craftsmen and workaholics and dwarves. He's solid, dependable, honest, hard-working, stern, and the polar opposite of fun. I can see why rock farmers would worship him, though.
There was a huge rumble of thunder and a massive wave of clouds came our way from the north; we were heading slowly into it, going northeastwards. Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire now flew back to us. "Want us to drive this storm off?" Dash asked.
"Let's camp and take refuge," Twilight said. "Trying to shape weather outside Equestria can have unpredictable side-effects, right?"
"Yeah," Dash said.
"Let's find a rock outcropping and camp on it. Time to break out our tents," Twilight said.
It was coming down in sheets by the time we found an outcropping. Then we had to carve some drainage lines so the water didn't puddle where our tents were meant to go. These tents held four, so we ended up with myself, Rarity, Spike, and Twilight in one, Fluttershy, the Wonderbolts, and Dash in another, and Ivan, Pinkie, and Applejack in a third. Dinner had to be fruit and dried meat. Twilight and I did some reading, Rarity did some sewing, and Spike half-helped her and half-helped Twilight and half-glared at me.
He was busy, but happy. Even the glaring seemed to make him happy.
"It's weird," Twilight said. "This reminds me of home. I mean when I lived with my parents. They'd be working on things they brought home and I'd either be working on homework or helping them like Spike helps me." She made a happy sigh. "Isn't it nice to work with those you care about?"
"Yes, it is," Rarity said. "Spike, thank you very much for helping me."
He smiled so brightly, the way little kids can. Adults like the rest of us get too old and too worn to be that happy. I remember too many bad times to ever fully accept anything good.
"I always helped Mother," Rarity said, pausing in her work. "Father worked with me and taught me archery, but I didn't want to be a warpony, so we never spent as much time together as I think he wanted." She sighed, clearly feeling guilty. "I also learned to sing from Father and so did Sweetie."
The rain hammered even harder, hitting irregularly in waves at random intervals. It was distracting and I could see Twilight had read the same passage twice.
"How about you, Marcus?" Twilight asked.
Hadn't I... oh, that was Pinkie and Applejack. "I was one son too many and got booted out the door as fast as I could be thrown out discreetly in the street and could defend myself," I told them. "I think I met Ivan shortly after that." It's hard to put it all together coherently, though.
They both sagged a little.
"My parents messed with the wrong red dragon," Spike said. "Which is how I ended up in Twilight's care. When I was really little, her parents helped Twilight take care of me, but now I can take care of myself."
Okay, 'my parents are dead' always wins.
I should go back and see my folks some time but I'm afraid of what they'll think of me. And... sometimes I'm not sure that's even the right history of me.
I tend to live in the present as my past is confusing.
Twilight put a fond hoof on Spike's shoulder and he smiled, then she said to me, "That's too bad. I was an only child because my parents realized they were too busy for more." She sighed. "But they loved me very much."
"I'm used to it," I said. "Probably their house would fall off a cliff if I did go visit them anyway." Rain always makes me kind of somber. Like it's trying to remind me of something I'd rather forget.
Rarity put a comforting hoof on my knee; I was seated on the floor, as was everyone else. "I'm sure it would go fine," she said. "I'm sure they'd be proud of you."
I hope so, but sometimes I'm not proud of me. Twilight...
I like being around her but every moment I do this adds to the DOOM CLOCK which is ticking.
"I'm sure too," Twilight said. "You're a good wizard and a good swordsman and you always stand by your friends."
I started... okay, I admit it, I was crying. The amount of trust they have on me is so... I can't stand to hurt Twilight again or Rarity or any of them, but when they find out the truth, they're going to hate me.
And I don't want them to hate me.
Spike made a noise at me which probably means 'CRY YOU EVIL BASTARD'.
Being hugged by two unicorns just made me cry more. It felt weirdly good to let it all out.
After a bit, Twilight let go, but Rarity held me until I stopped crying. Then Twilight said, "Spike, we have to go renew the wards."
"Can't I stay where it's dry?" he said.
"Spike, I can't do this without you," Twilight said very seriously.
He looked at Rarity, looked at me, then grimaced, then said, "Okay," reluctantly.
I heard Twilight say, "Blood of Odin!" as the rain hit her, and I laughed. I'd said that every time something went bad when I was pretending to be a Vestlander.
Then the depression hit me again. I am a homeless wanderer, apparently doomed to drift through the world forever. It seems like everything I touch ends up destroyed. And eventually, everyone I care about, I have to leave them or I panic and run or they settle down without me like Helga did.
Mind you, she's happy, and... well, I'm a little unhappy but mostly I'm happy for her. She got a happy ending.
All I get are unhappy endings.
I could hear Ivan busy laughing and Pinkie whooping it up about something. His life is as rootless and messy as mine, but he's happy and I'm here moping even though I'm with people I like.
People who all have other lives and would be there, safe and sound, but go out into this hellhole anyway in order that their other friends can stay in nice, safe lives. And if they didn't, I'd be dead. I owe them. But if I stay around them they'll be dragged down with me.
And if I go, the swamp will eat me.
The rain hammered the tent harder, making it shake. Damn, this is powerful rain. You could see the southern wall of the tent shake hard every time a wave hit it. "Marcus," Rarity said softly. "We have to go reinforce all the tents."
Bloody hell. "Okay," I said wearily, rising.
I was soaked to the bone by the time I finished helping to further secure and reinforce the tents. Rarity now summoned sheets from her shop with the ritual which Dona Carlotta had given her. I had to help her with it, as she's not used to using rituals; she's mostly stuck to honing her specialty of sewing and fashion and her other skills are related to artificing. Like her arrowheads.
Once we'd reinforced everything, we were both hideously wet. I was soaked to the bone, one big drippy mess. Dash came out and forced a microbubble of dry, though it was clearly hard, enough for Rarity to shake herself mostly dry.
"Hey, you okay?" Dash asked me softly.
"I'm fine," I told her. I was lying, of course. "I'm going to have to hang these up to dry and switch into... I guess I could put on my formal clothing." Having multiple outfits feels strange.
We went back in the tent and Rarity closed her eyes, smiling a little, while I changed into the formal clothing. I put a warming spell on the clothing, hoping it wouldn't catch fire. If I left it like that too long, it would.
Then I sat back down with Rarity next to me. Twilight had made some excuse about needing to give Pinkie a math quiz. I could hear Pinkie making sounds of horror in the distance while Ivan and Applejack were laughing and chanting something about plowing a field.
Don't know.
Don't tell me.
"The math, it burns, it burns!" I heard Pinkie shout.
Rarity laughed softly.
"You want to talk about it?" she asked softly.
I don't know how so many women can talk about it so easily. I mean if... I dunno. I wouldn't have a heart-felt talk with Dona Carlotta's new boyfriend about her. Especially since he's weaselly looking.
"Tell me about your sister."
"I have two. Snow Belle is the town doctor," Rarity said. "Sweetie is my younger sister; we take care of her while my father is stationed at one of the border forts. He's a warpony and mother is a weaver. Snow Belle is very hard working and kind; she loves to take care of people. Sweetie is also very kind and musically talented and loves to sew too. But she's... She often doesn't think things through. She and her two best friends are a little obsessed with growing up as fast as they can," Rarity said, speaking with strong affection, though at the end, she sounded regretful. "She runs with Applejack's sister Apple Bloom and with Scootaloo, who is a pegasus. You know about Cutie Marks, right?"
"Yes," I told her.
"It's not the only sign of moving to adulthood, but it's a transformational moment for Ponies. I don't even know what would be equivalent for humans." She sounded thoughtful.
"Humans never have that clarity," I told her. We sat next to each other on the floor; her presence was comforting and I could feel myself calming down. "A human never knows their place in the universe for sure."
"Never?" she said, sounding surprised.
"Never. Lots of people never figure out who they should be or where they are going or why they are doing it," I said. Like me. I just kind of drift, then run when the next explosion happens. Sometimes I like that, but seeing... they all know what they want and where they are going and who they are, and I kind of envy that. They all have a lot of naivete, and I don't want to be naive, but they have a kind of certainty, a REAL certainty I don't have.
Well, maybe using the word 'certain' with Pinkie isn't wise.
Rarity knows her place in the universe and she's happy with it.
I can hardly even imagine... no, I know. The few times things held together a while, I felt that. But then it blew up anyway.
"So you're still trying to find your place," she said softly.
"Yeah," I said.
"Well, you should come to Ponyville when this is over. I would hate to see you go after this and never see you again." She smiled and said in a sing-song way, "I could make you more hats."
I laughed, smiling. "Twilight suggested that too," I said to her. If I didn't have this looming death apocalypse hanging over me... The longer I stay, the more chances to reveal too much. And then I will die. But I can't come clean or I will DIE.
I can think of a half-dozen things... more really, I'd like to try that they'd be such a big help with.
Like that damn tower in the Broken Lands.
Wherever exactly it is.
She studied my outfit. "I bet I could make these more cheaply than they do." I could see a calculating look in her eye which made me smile. I like crafty people when they're not crafting on me.
So to speak.
"I think you definitely could. With fine Equestrian materials. And, of course, there will soon be a new trade agreement," I told her.
She smiled broadly. "There's also that huge market for Pony styles in Glantri, even fancier than what we wear." She began sketching out some ideas and I made a few suggestions and watched her work.
She'd come up with six outfits when she suddenly looked embarrassed. "I'm sorry, you need company and here I am working on my own projects."
"Watching you work cheers me up," I told her. She has drive, and I like that. I'd liked the way Twilight had drive too. I feel like I have drive just by being near her and helping her a little. It's faking drive, but I am good at faking things. "I like your ambition."
Rarity gave a kind of happy sigh. "You are a good friend, Marcus."
"You're a good friend too," I told her. "Did you have a good time at the party?"
"I had a grand time before it all turned into a food fight and..." She looked around, then whispered, "Even that was kind of fun."
I grinned. "I'll have you wearing lots of clothing soon," I said, then laughed. "Corrupt you completely."
"I hate getting messy but that was something exhilarating about an all out battle that couldn't actually lead to any killing," she said.
"I prefer cool elegance myself as well," I said to her. "But yes, some excitement sometimes is nice."
She patted my knee. "Feeling any better?" she asked.
"Yes," I said. "Enough we could probably call Twilight back from torturing Pinkie."
"I CAN'T BAKE A QUADRATIC EQUATION!" Pinkie shouted and we both laughed.
"Well, give her a few more minutes," Rarity said. "I think..." She paused and looked thoughtful, then glanced at the door.
Yet another wave of rain and distant thunder now hit us.
And then the ground shook. I fell on Rarity. "I am so sorry!" I said.
"It's fine," she said. "No damage done."
The ground shook again and Pinkie shouted, "MEGA TAIL TWITCH WITH HALLUCINATIONS OF CHEESE!" ...
Rarity leaped to her feet. "That's bad, even if I'm not sure how."
"What?"
"Pinkie... has magical detection abilities which cause her body to convulse," Rarity said. "She can predict certain future events, though I fear that it isn't too far in the future."
Rarity now switched into a water-resistant cloak with hood and passed me another one. It didn't fit well but would provide at least a little protection.
Pinkie was out in the rain, bouncing around. "There's a problem... in the ground... I think... Owww...."
Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire took to the air and generated a small dry pocket for us with some effort, so we could all confer. Looking around, the marshy ground east of us was shaking and convulsing; it was a mixture of muddy 'ridges' (a few feet above water level) and rivulets of water.
And now, suddenly, it collapsed into a fifty foot across sinkhole.
There was a great gurgling blast and water exploded upwards in a huge muddy geyser, though our Pegasi managed to blow it around us.
The geyser quickly died down but now the area around our outcropping started to turn into a lake, water rising up out of the ground.
"That isn't natural, is it?" I asked.
"It's not impossible that the water that burst up has been eating away the limestone," Pinkie said. "And now has formed a cenote. But the water being under so much pressure seems unnatural." She frowned.
"Are we going to have to abandon this place while we still can?" I asked.
"I think we should," Twilight said. "Miserable as these conditions are." She grimaced.
This is how I ended up wading through waist-deep water, surrounded by swimming ponies. The water was oddly cold despite the time of year, even for night.
"I'm freezing," Rarity said, clearly feeling irritable.
"We're all freezing, sugarcube. This wouldn't happen in Equestria," Applejack grumbled as she swam along.
"It wouldn't?" Ivan said.
"Not without warning and the water would be the RIGHT temperature instead of this weird random unpredictable weather and whatnot you have out here," Applejack said. "How do you even farm with random rainstorms and suddenly cold water exploding out of the ground?"
"I've never seen that happen before," Ivan said.
"There's limited conditions where you can get cenote formation," Pinkie said. "That geyser was really too large, though, I think."
"Maybe we should go back and investigate," Soarin' said.
"I do have a waterbreathing spell, but we need our rest," Twilight said. "Also, we have to stay focused; there's too many distractions in this swamp."
"I agree with Twilight," I said. "Best way to die on an adventure is to treat everything you see as something to stick your head in."
What followed was FOUR MILES of wading through high water until we found high ground, a nice solid hill which rose a hundred feet above the water and sprawled over lots of space for us to set up tents. Trees helped soak up rain and the Pegasi kept it off us long enough to all get dry. We started a fire to warm up with, as Fluttershy was worried we'd all get sick.
"I really don't like this swamp," Applejack said.
"No one on this planet likes this swamp," I said.
"It's not that bad," Fluttershy said. "It's full of nice animals."
Disease, tainted water, miasma, STUPIDLY HUGE rainstorms, and me having to freeze myself to death. I shivered and Rarity threw another blanket on me and we pressed together for warmth.
Twilight was doing the same thing with Spike; I bet she is nice and warm.
Admittedly, Rarity is pretty warm too.
"I wish we could ask Luna to delay the night ending a few hours. We're going to be zombies tomorrow," Dash said. She was pressing close to Fluttershy and Soarin', who had Spitfire on the other side of him.
"Yeah, tomorrow is going to be lousy," I said.
****************
Can you say hail in the middle of summer at 3 AM?
I can now. Hail began hammering and puncturing our tents, LETTING THE COLD RAIN IN.
Fuck you, hail. Fuck you forever.
"Okay, this has to be magic," I said as I stumbled out exhausted and freezing to help reinforce the tents; our Pegasi flew skyward to attack the cloud; they destroyed it but now the other clouds began closing in to fill the gap.
"This frost doesn't go with my cloak at all," a tired and grumpy Rarity said.
"I don't even HAVE a cloak," Ivan said, shivering.
Then Rarity knocked herself out summoning more cloth to reinforce the tents with, so Ivan and I had to drag her inside one and Twilight tried to use her magic to help us reinforce the tents. But she's better at BIG than fine control.
Eventually, our shelters could take it; I stung all over from hail and I was exhausted.
Twilight flooded power into Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire with a great howl of irritation and they blew up all the clouds. And we all finally got some sleep.
*****************
Until a stampede of snakes ran over everything, waking us up early and forcing us to deal with snakes. Fluttershy eventually convinced them to go; their homes had all flooded. They went to the next hill over.
Temperatures soared when the sun rose and we all felt kind of sick and groggy. This was going to be a terrible day.
"More magic," Twilight said frowning. "And I think someone may have scried us. I think someone is trying to soften us up."
This made way too much sense.
We had a cold breakfast and slogged onwards with Twilight doing her best to back up our Pegasi Fluttershy was becoming more and more frantic as more and more animals displaced by the crazy fits of weather showed up. Soarin' seemed frustrated, Spitfire was increasingly jumpy and Dash just got more and more tired, not used to having to constantly work at weather control like this. It was a lot harder here.
At lunch, I said, "We should teleport and come at him from another direction. I don't think we can keep this up. What we really need is a dry cave."
"If I try to teleport this many people, I'll have to sleep," Twilight said.
I think we need sleep anyway. We found a place to pitch the tents and let our Pegasi scout for caves. Once we found one, the Elements all pooled their power to help Twilight, then we clonked out in a nice, dry cave.
************
Either the cave shielded us from his scrying or our foe needed a break too, as our rest was unmolested except for finding blind moles rooting through our tents for food when we woke up.
You know you're tired when you set up tents inside a cave before bed.
"It's drizzling," Dash said when we got ready to go. "We need a plan."
"Can you turn us invisible, Twilight?" I asked.
"I didn't bring anything for invisibility," Twilight said. "Spike, Dragons don't normally control weather, right?"
"He's using a spell or item. I think Blacks can breathe underwater, but that won't help us," Spike said.
"Could we go underwater at least some of the way?" Soarin' asked thoughtfully.
"Actually, that might be a good idea. Harder to scry and we'd be protected from weather fluctuation," Twilight said.
And so we ended up underwater. Some of the group had underwater gear, and Twilight put a spell on the rest of us. For much of the day, other than having to eat soggy food, things went pretty well. Unfortunately, towards the end of the day, we had to come out and find shelter for the night. Also, the river deep enough to hide us turned a direction not useful to us.
Our scouts found us a cave and we headed for it; it was hideously humid but there was no rain, hail or other dooms.
As we slogged along a stream through muddy fields and patches of rock or at least higher, dryer dirt, I felt the tingle of scrying. "Dammit, they found us again."
We reached the cave, but now I was worried that our foe would find the cave. At least he or she hadn't been watching when we went into it.
Fluttershy talked the bear who lived there into sharing with us. Druids are GREAT.
Except when they decide you're an abomination of nature and must be destroyed. The scars eventually faded.
We slept like rocks and got mail in the morning via Spike. A letter to Rarity from Sweetie Belle, one to Applejack from Apple Bloom, and one from Scootaloo to Rainbow Dash. There was also a letter from Celestia to Twilight.
I felt a little stupidly sad that I didn't get a letter. Of course, ironically, no one who isn't here... or on the ship I guess... knows this identity to send me one.
Then Spike fell over, coughing and choking. I grabbed him and gave him the anti-choking move. Everyone stared, but he coughed up a big gout of fire. It turned into FIVE letters. Another one from Celestia to Twilight Sparkle, one from Luna to Twilight Sparkle, one from Luna to Rarity, one from Celestia to ME and one from Celestia to Ivan. Ivan blinked, Twilight blinked and I tried not to panic and flee into the night.
My letter turned out to be diplomatic credentials marking me as an official part of the delegation. Not a hint of any indication that she knows who I really am, which relieved me a little. Ivan's letter was the same thing.
There was a short personal note with it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Samus Marcus,
At the recommendation of my dear student Twilight Sparkle, I have added you to this diplomatic mission. Twilight has said many nice things about you and Ivan in her letters. I am so glad to see her making a new friend. I am looking forward to meeting you after this mission is over; please come with everyone to Canterlot for a nice success party once you deal with Vermicoritax. Luna and I wish to welcome you personally; Luna will be organizing the party. Luna has asked Rarity to ensure suitable formal attire for you and Ivan.
I am very sad I missed the party on Duchess Sapphire's yacht; I can only hope you return before she departs, so we can give her a proper Equestrian reception in the traditional style.
Looking forwards to meeting you,
Princess Celestia of Equestria, Sister of Princess Luna and Jarl Sleipnir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Huh, I'd never heard she was related to Odin's horse, though it would make sense, I thought.
I tried to figure out if 'Luna and I wish to welcome you personally' meant 'we wish to meet you' as one might think or if it really meant 'Luna will hold you down while I practice my back kicks'. The letter seemed to show she had no idea who I really was, but could I trust that?
"A party for our success," Ivan said. "Cool. I wish I was that certain myself." He laughed nervously.
"I know," I told him.
"C'mon, don't both be nervous nellies," Applejack said. "We'll handle Vermicoritax like we handled the other dragon, easy."
"Applejack, Grand Wyrms are the most dangerous dragons which exist," I said. "Except the four immortal dragons." The Great One, who rules the four, then there is one for Lawful (Metallic), one for Neutral (Gemstone), and one for Chaotic (Color) dragons. "Who are, thankfully, unlikely to show up." Strict rules restrict the Immortals from direct meddling in Mystara, except through a 'mortal identity', which is restricted to the power level of mortals. Or by giving orders to their priests but that's indirect meddling.
"Ain't nothing we can't handle, 'cept maybe this crazy Malpheggi weather," Applejack said.
"I think Vermicoritax or someone else is using magic to control the weather," I said. "Even for the Malpheggi, this isn't natural."
Rarity finished her two letters and put them in her pack, then started measuring me while we all discussed what to do next.
"Shouldn't we see them if they're controlling it?" Rainbow Dash said. "Pushing the clouds around and everything? I haven't seen a trace of any weatherponies or weatherdragons or whatever is doing this."
"Maybe one of Helga's in-laws is mad at us for some reason? The Aendyrs do weather magic, right?" Ivan asked.
"They do air magics, which can include weather control," I said. "This might be someone at that party's revenge too." I tapped my cheek. "Spike, do you have to know the person you're sending a letter to?"
"I need an accurate name," he said.
Well, Helga Aendyr should be accurate, I think.
I dashed her off a quick note and we made breakfast and discussed options while Rarity took measurements of Ivan and myself.
I was a little nervous; I'd put my real name... I think it's my real name... inside the letter but told her to address it to 'Samus Marcus, care of Spike'. That should get it to Spike to hand to me.
"I've got an idea," Rainbow Dash said. "Twilight, bulk me up and I'll carry Marcus up into the storm so he can look around with his magic eyes."
"Bulk you up?" Soarin' asked, confused.
It's probably a good idea, but I REALLY do not want to go out in that.
"Make me BIGGER," Dash said excitedly. "Big enough to carry a human! Anyway, all three of us can go, but someone's got to be big enough to carry Marcus."
I couldn't protest without looking like a loser, but I can't say the idea excited me.
Try the OPPOSITE.
But I had to outvote myself in order to retain some vestige of not being called nervous nellie every five minutes. (I can handle ten.)
I hate outvoting myself.
**************
Soarin' was kind enough to loan me his spare goggles, which Twilight made big enough for my head. Then we left the cave and took off into the roaring thunderstorm now raging outside. A thought hit me. "Tell me about how you make it rain," I said.
"I don't think ponies did this," Dash said. "It's too freakishly random and damn, it's cold again." She frowned.
The Wonderbolts were clearly plenty warm in their outfits. I applied my warming spell to Dash, though I was surprised she felt it more than me. I'm pretty sure Pegasi usually have good cold resistance.
"Indulge me," I said as I tried to study the clouds; we were flying just below cloud level, dodging lightning bolts. "Also, are those bolts random or is it aiming at us?"
"I think it's random," Spitfire said, but now she frowned at the clouds.
"Many clouds are manufactured at Cloudsdale," Rainbow Dash began. "Oooh, that feels nice, Marcus."
Easily distracted, check. Didn't want to distract her, check. But I kept up the warming spell, trying to make sure I didn't overdo it.
"They're usually small and we push and blow them together to make bigger rain. It's important, though, to be careful or you will rain out the cloud and then you either have to go back and get more or else make one by hand, which is harder. Either you have to consolidate rain particles in the air or else use a river or lake to draw up moisture," Dash continued as we soared through a low cloud. Lightning arced towards us and the Wonderbolts kicked it aside to hit another cloud.
"So these clouds must be pulling moisture from somewhere," I said slowly, trying to be sure. "Pulling it up out of the swamp or pulling in clouds from adjacent areas, right? However this works?"
"I guess maybe there's some way to make water from nothing, but normally, ponies push water together to make clouds, then froth it up," Soarin' said. "I'm more an acrobat than a weather specialist, though."
"I think Minrothad has human magic for this kind of thing," Spitfire said. "I talked to... well, maybe Elf magic, given an Elf told me about it when were recovered that stolen artifact for the Water Elves."
FUCK ME.
"Careful, Marcus," Dash said. She sounded worried.
Spitfire frowned. "I was thinking we should tie him on. If he falls, we can catch him but if we all get hit by lightning or something, we might not react in time."
DO NOT CRY.
Fortunately blinding rain hides tears VERY well.
"I'm good," I said, continuing to cling to Rainbow Dash for dear life. I know she won't drop me. I know I can rely on her.
But I also have to rely on my 'holding onto Rainbow Dash as she loops around in a blinding storm while dodging lightning' skills.
Which are not so hot.
I could see great ropy threads of magic through the clouds, pushing them around. Unfortunately, I haven't studied much weather magic.
"Are your eyes normally purple?" Soarin' hesitantly asked me.
"No, I'm using a detection spell," I told him. "I'm hoping Twilight can decipher what I'm seeing." I kept trying to puzzle it out. "So with the amount of rain we're getting, this must be sucking up water..." I don't want to say this AT ALL. "We need to find the edge of the storm."
This meant LOTS of flying through howling wind and rain and dodging lightning and at one point, dodging unhappy frogs too.
Eventually, the rain slacked and we found the edge of the clouds. They formed an irregular circle twenty-four miles across by Soarin's estimate. Water was being sucked skywards in a thick ropy cord of water from one of the many Malpheggi rivers.
"So if we cut this, it should eventually run out of water," Soarin' said.
"If they can't re-establish it," I said, then frowned. "No sign of whoever or however they're controlling it."
An alligator got sucked up the 'cord', which was about ten feet across. Poor thing. I felt bad for it.
Not bad enough to get near an angry alligator, mind you.
"Maybe it tracks us," Spitfire said, circling it.
"It's not tracking us three," I said. "Or the clouds would have moved when we did. It may be tagged to Twilight or it may be moved manually."
"Let's break it," Soarin' said.
"Yeah, time to kick its ASS," Rainbow Dash said.
"We shouldn't rush into things," I said.
"Let's see if someone's hidden down by the ground," Spitfire said.
A quick dive revealed that unless some fish or the riverbank was controlling it, it wasn't being controlled here. The threads of magic reached down from the cloud to here. Maybe I can trace them.
The three of them attacked and disrupted the suction chute, destroying it with their hooves. The water fell back down; the clouds continued but now they would eventually run out of liquid. Or so I hoped.
Then we wandered around for what was likely hours as I tried to trace through this to figure out how it was being controlled. We finally went back for lunch, wet and tired. The rain was starting to slack some, the clouds looked less potent. Go Pegasi! AND ME!
***************
Lunch was soup. Fluttershy had gone and caught us some fish with Ivan. It was so warming and filling and good and it had carrots in it.
"Thank you, Fluttershy," I told her as I tried to dry off.
"You need your protein," she said.
I nodded and ate vigorously.
To my surprise, in my absence, I got letters from Helga, Darien Aendyr (her husband), Samantha (their daughter), and someone named Lorban who I had never heard of but uses the Aendyr seal. Everyone was looking at them, clearly curious but unwilling to violate my privacy by opening them without me.
Ivan also got a letter from Helga, which he'd already read.
Spike sat by Twilight, making grumbling noises and holding his stomach. Too many letters too fast, I guess; Fluttershy mixed up a little brew and fed it to him. I expect he could do it himself but he let her do it anyway. Twilight patted his shoulder comfortingly.
The letter from Darien was quite brief:
~~~~~~~~~~~~
To the Dishonorable 'Samus Marcus',
If you drag my wife into another one of your insane schemes, I will feed your entrails to the undying souls of the Wind Dukes of Aaqa. If it somehow involves my daughter, I will scatter bits of you from Borea to the Tanagoro lands. You are a blight on everything which has ever existed or will exist. I feel sorry for whoever you've dragged into this, but they will have to learn the hard way. Please, die horribly and never darken my door again.
Your obedient Servant,
Lord Darien Aendyr
P.S.: You are a lousy excuse for a wizard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He's not very fond of me, but really, this was more cheerful than usual.
Helga's letter was ten pages long and most of it was a long account of our mutual friends and acquaintances, what is going on in her life, asking if I will be around this 'Spike' long term, nagging me for not writing more often, asking if I am still teaching Humanics in Equestria, gushing about how wonderful her daughter is and how much she loves her husband, asking if that was me who stole that harem in Thyatis, and asking for a picture so she can recognize me next time she sees me.
It also included a two page discourse on weather magic and that she'd asked a friend to write me.
I then read Lorban's letter. It was very technical and I had to get Twilight to help me decipher it; as I have mentioned, my 'training' was pretty informal once I finished my Glantrian school primer.
With his notes and some discussion with the Pegasi, we determined this was likely a ritual Lorban had noted. As there had been no sign of air elementals or other active maintainers of the storm. We could knock it out entirely by hitting certain key points in the lines of magical energy holding it together.
My worry was that whoever did this would, in fact just do the damn ritual again, though apparently it's expensive in components.
I then turned curiously to the letter from Samantha, who I haven't seen since she was a baby. I'm not even sure what she looks like now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Uncle Sammy,
I hope you are okay. Mommy says you get in trouble a lot, and she worries about you. Daddy doesn't like you for some reason, but he's kind of mean anyway. I want to be a great wizard like you and Mommy and Daddy one day.
I have a talking Pony friend named Sugar Sparkle. She has a wand stuck to her head. We both like candy. Mommy says you live in the land of the talking Ponies. I hope they are nicer than Daddy. My butt still hurts.
I didn't even do it!
I blame the Jinn.
He's always stealing things and blaming me. It's so unfair.
Daddy says to tell you there is candy inside the Dragon but he didn't say which kind. Do you like peppermints or licorice more? I like peppermints like Daddy.
Could you send Sugar Sparkle a brother? She is jealous because Tina has one.
It's nice to meet you. I drew a picture on the other side.
Your daughter,
Samantha Aendyr, Future Queen of Glantri.
P.S: Daddy says I am not your daughter, so I don't know how to end the letter. What am I?
P.P.S: Mommy says she's not your daughter either.
P.P.P.S: You didn't actually kill Prince Etienne, right? He isn't dead, so I don't understand what Daddy is saying.
P.P.P.P.S: Mommy wants to know if you have a girlfriend.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The other side had a crude picture of a blonde little girl holding hands with a tall, dark haired man in white robes and a tall blonde woman in white and green robes. Helga was also holding hands with a question mark, labeled 'I don't know what you look like but Mommy likes you'. A crudely drawn green pony with a white mane was standing on Darien's head for some reason, and was labeled 'Sugar Sparkle'. I don't think she was to scale.
I showed everyone the picture feeling an odd mix of sad and happy. Everything seems to be going well for Helga. Darien hates me but that's a given. And Samantha is doing well. But I felt kind of melancholy she had the kind of thing I didn't have. Couldn't have.
"Hey, Ivan, can you draw me?" I asked him.
"Sure. Hey, Dash, can you pose too?"
I sat astride giant-sized-Dash; pretty soon everyone wanted in and Ivan drew himself into the picture from memory, then carefully labeled everyone. This took a while but I needed a break from rain anyway.
I sent Helga a thank you with the picture for Samantha.
We all laid our plans and I went over some sketches for formal attire with Rarity, then stretched. "Much as I hate rain, I think it's time to... get wet again."
Pinkie studied the picture. "So she's never seen you?"
"I haven't been back since she was a baby," I told her. "I'm going to have to send Helga a big catchup letter later." Once I know how I'm going to get out of this alive.
I touched my hat and felt better. "Okay, Dash. Time for us to SAVE THE DAY!"
Dash cheered, Spitfire laughed and Soarin' grinned, then we took off.
****************
These goggles are a blessing. I don't think they're magic but they keep the rain out of my eyes, which is a big help. On the other hand, this means seeing exactly how many lightning strikes Dash has dodged in the last five minutes.
We took out two nodes... okay, more like I pointed it out, then clung desperately as ponies struck at it and broke it up.
At the third, though, a Dragonfly dropped out of the clouds, opening fire on us with fire and lightning. The Wonderbolts dodged off in two directions, Dash in a third. Dragonflies are Glantrian flying vehicles which look like giant dragonflies, complete with transparent wings. They're very maneuverable and usually armed with wands and staves. This one was a six-man one, used for scouting, so it had extra speed. The most powerful ones, you can take on several dragons at once and win.
Unfortunately for the Dragonfly, Pegasi.. are damn fast. They came down in a weaving formation and as it tried to rise to meet them, the Pegasi (and me, clinging for dear life) split and came it from three directions, dodging lighting and fire. Then we crashed right through the wings, sending it spiraling out of control. Spitfire, Soarin', and Rainbow Dash whipped up winds and guided it to crash into into a bunch of trees and bushes.
My contribution was to scream like a child being beaten the entire time.
Once it crashed, though, I fried one of the wand mounts with fire and Soarin' simply bit onto one of the others and ripped it off. Then I fried a third mount and Spitfire drove a tree down on the other, snapping it off. Rainbow Dash circled, dodging their counterfire.
Six battered wizards piled out of it, then Soarin' and Spitfire came down on them, grabbed one and sent the others flying with their wake. Then we headed back towards our cave, with our captive's head inside a tiny cloud so he couldn't see the way.
His name was Luigi Verrazno. He was from Caurenze, one of the Principalities of Glantri. "We serve the Dread Vermicoritax," he said firmly. "He sent us to trap you with bad weather so he could swoop in and eat you all once you were weak and sick. 'Cause that's how he rolls."
"Hah! Well, he blew it and we're gonna KICK HIS ASS!" Rainbow Dash said. "No storm's gonna bring US down."
I frowned. Not impossible but would a Grand Wyrm really employ a group of thugs from Caurenze? Even a really well equipped group of... dammit, that thing was valuable! We could have hauled the whole group in it! Dammit! "Is there more than one of you?" I asked.
Now that I think about it, the ponies would have had a hard time sitting in chairs. I've only met one pony who could actually sit like a human... I suppose Pinkie probably could do it too.
"Well, we weren't expecting you'd find us before the weather softened you up," he said, frowning. "Only we lost you for a while; you aren't easy to find."
"Looks like talkin' ain't gonna work," Applejack said, sighing. "If he's already trying to kill us."
"I don't want to fight a dragon head on if I can help it," Ivan said, frowning.
"Some dragons only respond to violence," Soarin' said, then sighed. "I've never fought anything as big as a Grand Wyrm, though. And usually it's with the full Wonderbolt squad."
Fluttershy shivered a little and cuddled up to Rarity, who put a comforting hoof on her leg. I see through your fear act now, Fluttershy. I've seen you go berserk. I bet you covered that other dragon in angry, yappy dogs, like that one poor Aalbanese guy.
I can still hear him screaming in my dreams.
I can see better why they think she can take out a Grand Wyrm, though I don't think we'll have enough animals around even in the swamp for something that big.
"We fight only if we must. We still may be able to talk him around."
Luigi frowned at that. "He's determined to DESTROY you."
"Why?" I said.
"Who knows, I just do what I'm told and get PAID," he said. Luigi shrugged.
So I turned him upside down until a bag of gold coins fell out. Glantrian money.
"So he paid you in Glantrian coins," I said, frowning. I smell a TRICK.
Hey, TREASURE! Sweet!
Dammit, we can't shake the other ones down for money if they're lost in the jungle!
"Hey, Glantrian money's as good as pony money!" he said.
Rarity looked at me. I looked at Rarity.
She slinked forward and as he sat surrounded by all of us, he stared at her warily. Soarin' was staring at her, eyes wide, until Dash frowned and elbowed him, which made Spitfire laugh softly.
"Good sir," Rarity said, fluttering her eyelids at him. I could see him getting nervous. I, on the other hand, grinned broadly, knowing some sort of impressive social maneuvering was about to ensue.
For some reason, Twilight was staring at Rarity, eyes wide. What was she worried about?
Hmm. I put up magical detection but I couldn't find any failsafe bombs or the like on him. What's Twilight worried about?
Rarity began to circle him, swaying gently, her voice a purr. Soarin' was covering his eyes for some reason. Dash kept rubbing her forehead. "I know, times are hard, and you take whatever jobs you can to get by. I'm sure you have nothing personal against us," she said.
"Nothing personal," he said, eyes crossing, trying to not look at her.
She kept moving to intercept his gaze. "And we have nothing personal against you."
"He tried to zap me with lightning!," Rainbow Dash said, but Spitfire put a hoof on her shoulder and whispered to her.
"Well, Rainbow Dash might," Rarity said, "But I just see a hard working man trying to keep him and his together in a difficult world." She put a hoof on his shoulder briefly, patting it.
"Uh, yeah," Luigi said weakly. He looked slightly dazed.
Now Twilight was staring at me, looking worried. I don't know why.
"And I'm sure that will be much harder if we have to hand you over to Celestia to be banished to the Moon," I said.
Twilight jumped. Okay, I wasn't thinking about that, but at least this time I know why she got jumpy.
"The moon?" Luigi said nervously.
"The invisible one, full of cat-people," I said sadly. They're known as Rakasta and they're all bat-shit insane. Blah blah, honor, now I must kill you because you looked at my sushi, blah. Also, eating raw fish is a good way to GET SICK YOU KNOW.
Sorry, I'm still bitter.
I leaned forward and began batting something invisible back and forth between my hands, back and forth, back and forth. "It's a long way from home."
Good cop, bad cop, oldest trick in the book.
Rarity smiled. "I'd hate to see you cut off from your family and friends, your favorite bar. Celestia is very merciful to the repentant, everyone knows that. Can't you be a dear and tell us what is really going on?" She patted his leg now and he jumped.
"The moon is very cold and dark," Twilight squeaked, shivering. "You're all alone and in the night, the ice weasels come." ...
Spike patted Twilight sympathetically.
"We, uh..." Luigi said nervously.
Rarity dropped down before him in that weird pose thing I don't know the name of, hindquarters down, front up... dogs do it sometimes too. "Go on," she said encouragingly, stretching her legs.
"We got hired by a guy from the Guild of Spokesmen to do this and to drive you off from seeing the Dragon and to tell you we worked for him," Luigi said frantically. "Don't banish me to the moon!"
Rarity patted his knee. "That wasn't so hard, was it?" Then she returned back to sit down by me and Fluttershy, still doing that swaying walk, while Luigi continued to look both panicked and dazed.
"Who at the Guild hired you?" Spike asked, frowning.
"It won't matter," I told Spike. "Guild members are conditioned with magic; they can't give up an employer's secrets no matter what. Even if it would save their life." I stroked my chin. "Whoever it was, though, they wanted us to capture him and 'find out' he worked for Vermicoritax. This was not an adequate attack to take this group out. Unless they under-estimated us." Admittedly commonplace in the world of adventure.
"Hey, we're pretty good," Luigi protested.
"A third of the group took you down by themselves," I said flatly.
"Hell yeah!" Dash said and high-hoofed the two Wonderbolts.
"You didn't even fight us! You just grabbed me and ran!," Luigi said, sounding angry. Too bad.
"Why fight you when the Malpheggi will do it for us?" I said. "Frankly, you're the lucky one, Luigi."
"It's best to avoid unnecessary violence," Fluttershy said with an almost normal tone of voice. "I mean, if you don't mind," she squeaked and retreated.
"What do we do with him?" Applejack said. "We can't just haul him around with us and we can't just turn him loose."
"I dunno, why not?" Rainbow Dash said. "No one got hurt and I think trying to get home alone through this place is punishment enough."
"But what if something eats him?" Fluttershy said, worried.
Only Ponies would worry about that. And a well-fed halfling, I suppose. The thin ones are the DANGEROUS ones.
"He's a mage, he can take care of himself," I said.
"We could dump him with his friends; they can eventually make their way out," Soarin' said.
"Yeah, that works," Dash said.
Of course, dumping him with his friends increases the risk they'll take another crack at us.
Twilight put down a book she consulted. "We can't take him back to Equestria because this is Darokin; we'd have to turn him over to the authorities. Elstrich or Fort Nar would be closest."
"That's way out of our way," Spitfire said, studying Twilight's map.
"Probably the best solution, though," Applejack said.
"Unless the Pegasi haul him there, it's something like five days there, then five back, if I read the map right," I said, looking at it.
"*We* could do it lickety-split," Rainbow Dash said.
"We can do it in three hours," Spitfire said. "Since we have to carry him, maybe a little longer."
I frowned. Rule 1. NEVER SPLIT THE PARTY. I made my uncomfortable zone noises.
"If the dragon finds us while they're gone, we'd be down a third of our fighting strength," Ivan said, clearly thinking like me.
"I think it's the best idea," Rarity said. "We don't have a prison and the Pegasi can do it quickly."
"But what if something happens to them?" I said to her, frowning.
Pinkie Pie, for some reason, smiled very brightly. Hopefully not hoping they'd die.
"They're not children, Marcus," Rarity said carefully. "They can take care of themselves."
"I'd rather go back to my friends," Luigi said.
"You don't get a vote, sugarcube," Applejack said to him flatly. She turned back to the rest of us. "Much as I am kinda worried that something will happen, I know how fast Dash is and the Wonderbolts are just as fast. You three think you can do this?"
"No problem AT ALL," Dash said confidently.
I could not shake the image of them being eaten by a dragon. I'd known too many confident people who rushed off to a beating or worse.
I'd been those people a few times.
I have no idea if Vermicoritax actually has even a clue we are coming. I suspect whoever scried us hired the Glantrians, but it could be someone on the boat.
The Wonderbolts nodded confidently. "We haul prisoners sometimes. We should be fine. There's hardly anything other than air elementals that can keep up with us," Spitfire said.
"I say we go with airmailing the prisoner to Fort Nar or... the other place," Applejack said.
"I agree," Rarity said.
"I'm worried they'll get picked off somehow," I said, frowning. We can't afford to lose three people when we haven't even reached Vermicoritax's lair yet. "We don't even have a way to be sure if they're okay or not."
"I'll go with them," Spike said. "If something goes wrong, I can send a help message." He looked at me defiantly.
Great, now I'm sending Spike off to his death. Twilight is going to hate me forever EVEN MORE now.
"I kind of agree with Marcus, divide and GET conquered," Ivan said. "Better to just dump him with his friends and move on."
Fluttershy hesitated, looking at Dash and company, at Luigi, then at me and the others. "I...umm... abstain."
"C'mon, you gotta vote yes or no," Dash said chidingly and Fluttershy shrank in on herself a little.
"It's okay," Rarity said to Fluttershy. She looked at me. "Don't you believe in Rainbow Dash?" Being chided over my effort to keep someone ALIVE did not sit well with me.
"I wouldn't go whipping around through storms with her if I didn't believe in her skills!," I said hotly, trying not to lose it. Why am I even getting so angry?
"Then why can't you believe in her NOW?" she asked, doing something I assume is equivalent to a woman crossing her arms across her chest but which looks awkward and kind of uncomfortable on a pony. There's balance issues, even sitting down. "We can take care of ourselves, you know."
I'm the one who can't take care of himself. Or anyone else, it seems sometimes. "I didn't say she couldn't!," I said, trying to push my voice down as it fought me. "But there's a DRAGON out there and I don't even know if all of us together can deal with a Grand Wyrm, let alone three of us!"
"It's gonna eat you all," Luigi said cheerfully. "Grand Wyrms kick the shit out of anything short of a Prince."
"Shut up," Ivan snapped at Luigi, who looked amused.
"C'mon, it's a Grand Wyrm. Even Jagger is careful with Grand Wyrms," Luigi said. "You think it's gonna play nice? If it notices the three of you, you're gonna get eaten. And so will I." He shivered. "You'd be better off taking me to Fort Nar all together, then going back to Equestria. Where it's SAFE."
"We may be small but we are not children," Rarity said firmly to him, sounding irritated. "I am sure the three of them can handle themselves."
"I've seen lots of people who could 'handle it' get in over their heads," I said urgently. If more people die... I just can't take it.
"We'll be fine," Dash said to me. "Come on, trust me, I know what I can do." She sounded confident and pleading at once.
"We'll be fine," Spitfire said. "We're professionals."
"Yeah, we only got singed a little on Honor Island," Soarin' said proudly.
"Not helping," Spitfire whispered a little too loudly to him.
"Look, I can't stop you," I said. "But I'm going to be sitting here panicking until you come back."
Applejack made a noise I think means 'ack'.
"Hah! We'll show you, Mr. Nervous Nellie!," Spike said defiantly. "I'll kick that dragon's ass if it shows up!" He began miming punches and kicks.
"Don't take any excessive chances, Spike," Rarity said, then took out a blue and gold scarf, which showed a sunny sky, and wrapped it around his neck. "You may get cold in the wind."
"Thanks, Rarity!" he said, looking like KING OF THE WORLD.
Twilight looked at Pinkie. "What do you think?"
Pinkie started. "I'm not sure if that scarf goes with the color of Spike's scales."
Twilight now fell down in surprise. I buried my face in my hands.
"I could bust out my... well, I'd have to rebuild my gyrocopter. Herr Sigismund and I figured out how to make it better," Pinkie said, pulling out the blueprints. She now began pontificating to Twilight, who now totally forgot what we were discussing and began talking about how to make it work better with Pinkie. ...
"Look, Marcus, it's gonna be okay," Dash said. "We'll take Spike, and we'll be back lickety-split." She came over and patted my shoulder. "Don't worry, we are the GREATEST."
Everyone thinks that until they get EATEN.
I sighed and sagged a little. "Be careful." I told her. Dammit, I really hate CARING. It mostly is useful for bringing you pain.
"It's gonna be fine," Dash said to me.
Fluttershy looked at me, looked at Dash, then said softly, "Good luck, Dash."
"Thanks. Uh... we'll just go before Pinkie tries to come with us," Dash said. "Come on, Luigi."
Rarity got Twilight to throw the enlarging spell again and they tied Luigi onto Dash while I pouted. Twilight went back to helping Pinkie with her engineering.
Soon, they took off and I lurked by the wall, worrying and feeling my gut churn as the rain slowly slackened outside.
Ivan and Applejack hung out, drawing maps of a farm on the floor and talking shop. Rarity lurked near Twilight and Pinkie, working on some clothing and calling Ivan over at times. And I sat by the wall, shuffling my deck of cards over and over and drifting off into a frustrated, worried haze.
At some point, Fluttershy sat down next to me and said softly, "You can pet me if it makes you feel better." ...
It did, in fact. I don't know why.
"It triggers buried instincts from the days when your ancestors groomed each other. It's the same reason your pets like it," she said. "Ponies like nuzzling and hugging too."
"You're not a pet," I said, trying not to remember how Corin got eaten by that damn dragon-turtle. Which isn't really a dragon but it's way too evil and friend-eating to be a true turtle either.
I've seen a lot of people die. Most of the time, the pain's gone... too many competing for time in my head. But now I can't help but imagine Dash dying and I don't like that image.
But caring means it hurts MORE if you lose someone. It's easier to not care if it just means pain.
"People like touching each other too," she said, touching my knee just for a moment. She glanced at Rarity, who did not seem to be paying attention.
"I've seen a lot of people die, Fluttershy," I told her softly. "I don't... I don't want Dash to think I think she can't handle it, but even the best get hurt," I said. Every time I let myself care, I get burned. Or I have to leave.
At least Helga is happy and Twilight is pretty happy and Dona Carlotta is pretty happy too. That makes me feel better even if Twilight is remembering me...old me too much. And Ivan's alive and on his way to getting suckered by a fake immortal, which reminds me, I have to steal those lock picks to keep him out of the trap.
"I know," Fluttershy said softly, patting my foot as I sat cross-legged next to her, back to the wall. "Animals die, faster than us," she said, and sighed. "It's sad, but we have to go on. I'm kind of hoping to be a tree in my next life." She smiled brightly at the idea.
A tree?
"I don't know what I'd want to be if I wasn't human," I told her. "Something that could fly, maybe." EASY to run away with wings.
She smiled brightly at that; I hadn't actually PLANNED currying favor, but hey, take all the curried favor you can get. "Anyway, I know it's not easy," she said kindly to me. "But Rainbow Dash is very strong and so are her friends and it's mainly just flying."
I probably would have freaked out without her comforting presence. Ivan seemed totally relaxed after a little while and I felt very annoyed with his casual palling around with Applejack when a third of the group was off risking their life for a dimwitted Glantrian we should have just dumped in the Malpheggi.
Risking their life for someone who had specifically tried to KILL them or at least injure them. For reasons which still remain unclear. And which we don't have time to investigate.
And I had a fight with Rarity. At least it was a fight over something of substance; Dona Carlotta and I once had a fight over... I'm still not sure but apparently I didn't like her dress enough or something and we had a three hour argument over everything humans and elves ever did to each other, then eventually we made up and had mad sex.
I'm not looking for mad sex with Rarity, she is a Pony, after all, but I don't like fighting with her. Does she think I don't trust HER to carry her weight? What did I even say?
Fluttershy was kind enough to lurk comfortingly while I brooded, which was a big help. Of course, it just illustrates that Ponies are nicer than people. They can meet someone and pretty quickly, they'll go to great lengths for them. I can't bond to people that quickly.
Dammit, Dash, if you get killed I'm going to throw up.
I can just see the dragon diving out of the sky and just... a dragon that size can bite a pony in half with one chomp. Damn my imagination.
I forced myself not to curl up in a ball, and Fluttershy now began a wordless song, sung very softly. I felt it more than I heard it. I began humming it as well, and we continued for what felt like forever.
I could see Rarity and Twilight talking quietly, while Pinkie was busy trying to make a model of some weird machine that looked gnomish in style to me. They build really crazy devices. She was using modeling clay, I think.
Eventually, my nerves kept jacking up higher and I wanted to DO something but I had nothing to do. I was about ready to explode when suddenly, I started choking, apparently just for fun.
Everyone's head swung around as I keeled over, trying to cough it up, and now Fluttershy began trying to thump my back, but her blows... were way too gentle.
Applejack, on the other hand, and Ivan grabbed me, pushing in front somehow and I suddenly coughed up green flame and spat a letter into Applejack's face. "Sorry," I mumbled.
"I guess his aim is off," Twilight said, catching it and opening it. "He says they made it to Fort Nar and they handed over Luigi."
'His aim is off'. I doubt that was an accident. Spike wouldn't try to kill me, but make me sick, yeah. "I will make you some tea," Fluttershy said.
"Thank you," I said and just kind of laid there, letting her take care of me and feeling fairly frustrated. I'll be... well, better once I know they're okay.
I hate caring about people. It makes it a lot easier to hurt.
****************
Twilight eventually pulled me aside. "You okay?"
"Do I look okay?" I said miserably. I had reached the point of being sick of my own shit, which meant that now I was worrying about worrying. As well as worrying. Given an hour or two more, I would reach the point where I would worry about how much I was worrying about worrying and either become all-powerful or go mad from recursion.
She touched her forehead with a hoof. "I never know what to say." She glanced at Pinkie, who was still working on her gyrocopter model and had made a tiny clay Pinkie to pilot it. "Normally, Pinkie handles cheering people up but she's kind of distracted, I guess." She sounded surprised.
She probably senses my fear. No, wait, predators LIKE fear.
How can she be so happy in a world like this?
Twilight, at least, knows what sorrow is. I felt a sudden sense of kinship there. "Me neither," I confessed. "I am good at being gracious and courtly but not good at talking about my feelings."
"I've noticed," she said. "But I'm not good at it either. I spent a lot of time trying not to have any because they got in the way of my studies." She settled down into that sphinx-like position, next to me.
I kept shuffling my cards nervously. I suddenly wondered if she'd recognize the deck, but clearly she didn't. I didn't get much use for it when I knew her. "Have you read Didymus' Machina Explicata?" I asked.
"Of course," she said. "His chapter on organizing was a big help to me."
"Chapter twelve is my favorite. 'Never Split the Party'. It's why I'm so worried. Dividing force in the face of danger is dangerous itself," I said.
"It's where he said, 'The best friends are different from you; their strengths cover your weaknesses, their weaknesses, you cover with your strengths. Everyone can't be good at everything, but the sum is more than the whole of its parts.', right?" she said softly.
"Yes," I told her. "It's key to a good adventuring party."
"Or friendship," she said, looking fondly at her friends.
"Well, that's the same thing," I said. "A really good group will become friends. The stress of battle either forges you together or you fail and..." I couldn't bring myself to say 'die'.
"You really should come back to Ponyville with us for a while, at least, after this. You don't have any big plans, right?" Twilight said hopefully.
"I didn't know where I would be going once the dragon was gone," I told her. "I'd love to see Ponyville," I told her. I will die if I go to Ponyville. If I stick around. Only now it's quite obvious to me I won't be too happy if I just leave, either.
DAMMIT.
"Good," she said warmly, then got nervous. "I... look..." She looked at Rarity, then at me. "There's... I read a book. About... Umm..." She grew steadily more agitated.
I blinked, wondering what was going on. "What book?"
"I... it..." Her face was red. "I mean... she... thing..."
Weirdly, watching her disintegrate helped me to integrate. "It's okay, new topic, so you don't have to be embarrassed."
Does she have a thing for Rarity? Rarity has a great deal of charm, so I'm sure she has many admirers and Twilight is the type, I think, to get swept along by charm under the right circumstances. Or maybe Rarity just gave her some advice on pursuing boys she finds embarrassing? Or teased her, maybe?
"Having a fight with a friend is terrible, right?" she finally squeaked out.
"Yes," I said, and sighed. "I didn't mean to come off as if I didn't think Dash can do her thing. But no one but me seems to take this dragon seriously."
"I'm not even sure why Rarity is so jumpy. She's hiding something," Twilight said, then looked at Pinkie and mumbled for a few seconds. "Well, see... we..." She sighed. "I can't talk about it. But basically, we've faced something stronger than this dragon and won." ...
"Seriously?" I said, amazed.
"I swear I am telling the truth," she said, hoof over her heart. At least I assume Ponies have their heart on the same side as us.
But Twilight wouldn't lie. "Okay, then," I said, though I wondered what on Mystara they'd faced down. A really elder beholder? Some Immortal's super-potent mortal form that only barely qualifies as 'mortal'? A demon?
"Don't worry, it's going to be okay," she said comfortingly. "Can I get you to help me with an experiment?"
"Of course," I told her. It beat sitting around slowly going mad.
Soon, we were knee deep in balls of lightning and laughing as they zipped around. Sometimes, all you need is a good distraction, I guess.
**************
We were still manipulating ball lightning together when Dash suddenly shouted, "It's a lightning storm! I'll save you!"
"No wait!" I said, and then got swept away along with Twilight and now the Wonderbolts were kicking the balls of lightning into non-existence
"There went that experiment," Twilight said weakly and I was on the ground with Dash standing over me.
"See, I'm totally okay," Dash said. "Touch me."
Confused, I touched her shoulder.
"Not undead or anything. But... umm... You okay?" she said, trailing off.
"I'm fine; we were studying how to manipulate ball lightning with magic. Twilight was trying to teach me."
"..."
"It's fine," I told her. We can start over. "So it went okay?"
"It went okay AND we bought you some salt beef from a guy hauling shipments of it down the Arbandrine River to Port Tenobar," Dash said. "Soarin' has it."
"It's very beefy," Soarin' said and Spitfire snickered. "What?" he said and Spitfire snickered more.
I got up once Dash got to where she wasn't in the way. "I'm glad you're okay," I told her.
She laughed nervously. "I told you I'd be fine." She smacked my shoulder. "No reason to worry, Marcus."
"Okay," Twilight said, and got them to report on the trip. They encountered a bunch of merchants going up and down the Arbandrine in fortified barges. Tenobar has gotten a lot more trade since the Equestrians ran a train line to it. Darokin keeps talking about building train lines, but a train to Tenobar would have to run pretty close to the Malpheggi.
And the Everfree Forest too.
They successfully handed over Luigi and came back. No problems at all.
This clearly meant the universe was saving up for a BIG problem.
We decided to scout our route forwards today but make our next move tomorrow, when it should be done raining and safe to go forwards.
Pinkie, having finished her model making, put it away and threw a 'cave people' party in which we all pretended to be primitive rock chuckers and ate pastries which resembled rocks. I felt somewhat better by the end, though still a little melancholy. My worries wouldn't stay away, though Twilight seemed to have reason to feel competent.
I laid down to sleep, hoping everything would go well tomorrow.
*****************
We set out into the muck and the heat of the very humid swamp, though right now we were passing through relatively high land which was fairly dry and solid, densely forested with fungus everywhere. This made me nervous, especially anything purplish in color.
Our goal was to cross the range of hills, cross a river, cross a large marsh, then reach the fringe of the next range and camp there. The next morning we'd have a short trip to where Vermicoritax is thought to dwell. Twilight and I talked shop, while Rarity and I glanced at each other, but neither of us could quite muster the strength to breach the silence.
For me, it was my natural cowardice. I don't know what held her back. She doesn't seem the type to be afraid to talk to someone. I just didn't want another fight. I still owed her too much.
The day was pretty miserable; lots of long walking and my legs were stiff. Then we had to cross a river, which meant tying ourselves together and swimming. For some of us, like Applejack or Dash, this was easy. For me or for Rarity, it didn't go as well.
Then we had to cross a marsh; by the end, I was a filthy, stinky mess and so was Rarity and well, everyone else.
When the land finally rose, we soon found something interesting; there was a crumbling, vine-covered complex of buildings, probably hundreds of years old. We cleared off some vines and found a holy symbol. For some crazy reason, Ixion (Immortal of the Sun) had apparently commanded his followers to build a monastery here.
There was no clear sign of what happened, though one of the walls of the main building was blown inward in three locations with blackened, pitted bricks. And there was a ten foot wide staircase descending into the darkness; cool air rose up from it.
"We should see if it's safe, then camp down in the nice cool air," I said.
There was a well, so we drew some water and took a little rest in the ruins, then descended down the stairs; the walls were lined with devotional images of Ixion doing things like raising the sun and smiting undead and making out with Valerias (Immortal of love and war). "Hey, Celestia raises the sun," Dash said, frowning.
Actually the rotation of the planet raises it, though I expect Ixion or Celestia does have influence over it. But I only argue with believers when there is a point. "Pine Cone argued in his fourth book, Comparative Theology, that Ixion was an effort to humanify Celestia. Notice the similarity of many of these images to the ones found at l'caveurn d'Poni," Twilight pointed out.
I have no idea what l'caveurn d'Poni is. Sounds vaguely like the weird language they use in New Averoigne, though. Apparently the Averoigneans in Glantri came from another plane and brought their own weird language.
"Ixion is one of the oldest immortals," I replied. "He's one of the handful who predate humans and Ponies alike. Also, given that Celestia is sister to Sleipnir, she can't predate Ixion. Though she is pretty ancient if that's the case."
"Why the similarity of imagery?" Twilight asked. "This is much more sophisticated art, but the poses are the same, just better executed here."
"Why are you two standing on the stairs blocking me getting down them?" Applejack asked.
We both laughed nervously and Rarity made a noise. Now what? Then we moved down the stairs into the room at the bottom; it was thirty foot square with a fifteen foot high ceiling, the walls made of smooth stone painted with now long faded and damaged and often moldy devotional art of Ixion. Hallways ran off west, south, and east; we'd come down from the north.
Twilight ran a hoof along the wall. "Carved from the bedrock, rather than this being cut stone dressing."
"They probably hired dwarves," Pinkie said. She tapped the wall. "It's solid. Plain old reliable granite. Long ago, magma thrust up into weaker rocks, forming these hills; all this rain gradually eroded away the other rocks, leaving these hills."
She then hopped around the room. "Cold air is coming from the east and south. Stagnant from the west; it must lead to a dead end"
I had put a glowy spell on my hat and Rarity and Twilight were shining their horns. A quick check showed the hallway west ran twenty feet to a door, the eastern hallway ran thirty feet, then turned north, and the southern hallway ran south more than sixty feet, going beyond the light of my hat or the horns.
"I wonder how big this place is," Twilight mused.
"We should probably just make sure we're safe here and not go too deep," Rarity said. "We need to save our strength for the dragon."
"I have to open that door," Pinkie said. "I made a *promise*."
"To who?" Fluttershy asked.
"Myself! To leave no door unopened, no stone unmossed, no cake uneaten!" Pinkie said.
"Hold on," I said. "Twilight and I will make sure it isn't trapped with magic."
"And I'll look for any mundane traps," Ivan said.
"Why would there be a trap on the cellar door?" Applejack asked.
"There is ALWAYS a trap on the door underground," Ivan said.
"Trust us, we deal with this sort of thing all the time," I said.
This is probably some crazy twenty level dungeon run by a mad wizard and if we didn't have to deal with the dragon eating us soon, I'd want to explore it, because mad wizards give the best toys if you win.
But they also tend to think that it's a good idea to put a barrel in a room, mark it 'sugar', then fill it with BEES.
Bees which somehow spit up cockatrices.
Who are on fire.
First Twilight and I studied it. It had been crudely locked with magic, which intrigued me. Not a very good wizard, though. We easily broke the spell and let Ivan in.
He tinkered with the lock. "Classic poison needle in the lock trap," he said. "Now here's the interesting thing. Notice those hinges?" He pointed to the perfectly ordinary hinges.
"Do they spit fire or something?" Applejack said, frowning.
"No, they're on THIS side, and you know what that means," Ivan said as he tinkered with small tools and listened with a cup to the door; the cup had a fine mesh over the mouth; it stops ear burrowing worm monsters and the like.
"It means someone liked OAK leaves," Pinkie said.
"Maple," Fluttershy said softly.
They were made of brass and shaped like maple leaves, yes.
"It means the door opens towards us and was meant to keep something on the other side out of here, not those on this side from crossing over," Ivan said, pouring a little oil into the lock. Then he stuck his lock picks in. Click, clock, click and the door opened a tiny touch. "Okay, Applejack, swap with me; if something nasty is beyond the door, we need to kick its ass."
"Oh NOW you want me," Applejack grumbled.
"Hey, fingers are MADE for this job," Ivan said. "And hooves are made for kicking someone's ass."
"Kicking a don... oh," Twilight said. Most of the rest of us laughed, Fluttershy patted her comfortingly and now Applejack bucked the door open.
This room was rough, natural stone, about fifty feet long north to south and twenty five, east to west. By the west wall, a stream ran into the room, ran south, and formed a large pool by the wall; sacks with something yellow and purple spilling out stood near the pool, still neatly stacked, and the water rippled in a way that made me nervous. There was a large stone box against the north wall, lined with tile and half-full of stagnant water. The water in the stream was fresh and sparkling. "Be wary of that weird stuff over there," I said, pointing to the yellow and purple... I'm not sure what they are. Small hunks of yellow and purple planty kind of stuff.
"That's GRAIN, but it's moldy," Applejack said, frowning. "Hey, Fluttershy, got a face mask?"
Fluttershy passed her a kind of breathing mask thing and helped her strap it on. We all lurked just inside the room as Applejack slowly approached it.
"It may try to fire spores at you," I said.
"Only an idiot stores grain in a room with an underground river. It's like asking for it to rot," Applejack said, frowning "Either this is a mold trap or somethin' weird's going on." She studied the room warily.
"This may well be a dungeon now, with some mad wizard moved in and forcing everyone to dance for his amusement. Just remember, in a dungeon, everything is deadly. Rewards are high, but it's very dangerous."
"We should get out, then," Applejack said. She paused. "Something's in the water."
"Retreat!" I shouted.
It was too late as the giant crayfish rose out of the water and snapped at Applejack, who leaped up and landed on its head and began jumping up and down. It hit the sacks and moldy grain and spores went everywhere.
This thing had better be rich, or Fluttershy had better be loaded up on curing disease, I thought.
Fluttershy now began a song, and the spores began to change color. Some of the spores came towards us, but Pinkie batted them away with a giant spatula. The Wonderbolts and Dash sprung into action; they hit the spores and whipped them up with winds and dumped them into the water where the current took them away. Rarity now raised an arrow and shot the giant crayfish at the point where its right claws came together and it howled and now its claws were stuck open and she smiled.
"Anyone got butter?" I said, then dumped my flame spell on its tail; it howled at that and tried to turn around to face a non-extant foe as Applejack bounced on its head.
"I do!" Pinkie said, somehow producing a cauldron and a huge slab of butter. "You and Ivan will eat on this for WEEKS."
"I got this," Applejack said; leaping around, kicking and pushing, she drove it down the length of the pool and underwater to flee from us.
Twilight and I then set the grain on fire while the Wonderbolts and Dash kept the spores from escaping. Unfortunately, this filled the room with smoke, forcing us to escape.
"Dammit, there was probably treasure," Ivan grumbled.
"I got a mask on, I'll check," Applejack said "It had better be WORTH IT."
She returned with fifty gold coins, two hundred and twelve silver, and three large topazes. "Some crazy pony put all this in the grain." She shook her head. "And this." She carefully plucked a purple potion out of her pack. "Any idea what it is?"
"Ooh, potion of Polymorphing," Ivan said. "I like to carry some on me but I lost all of mine in the swamp when we got stuck in the river."
"What does that do?" Rarity asked, her voice a little tight.
"Basically, you take on the form of whatever you want of the same kingdom, so you can't be a tree or a fungus but you can be a dog or a pony or a elf. And you keep your own magical abilities if you have any but gain the physical abilities of your body. And if you stay changed too long, it kind of messes with your mind some. Usually, though, it wears off before *too* much of that. And you get the physical instincts to use your new form," Ivan said.
Rarity studied it curiously. "Do you drink the whole thing?"
"The more you take, the more it lasts," he said. "I guess you should take the gems since you can make something pretty with them."
Rarity nodded and took them, looking thoughtful. I wonder what she wants to turn into.
"Polymorphing can be fun but kind of scary if you're not used to it," I said.
Twilight said, "I didn't know you knew any shapeshifting magic, Marcus." She sounded curious.
"I don't but I've used it or been transformed by items in times past," I told her. "This could be a big help; we could turn Applejack or Dash into a dragon and have her kick some ass with it, if we need to."
"Hey, I already AM a dragon," Spike said.
"I'm not sure if it could change your age or you'd just turn into another kind of baby dragon," I told him.
"I'm not a BABY," he fumed. "I'm a young adult."
He's a baby. Or he wouldn't be shorter than me. Dragons are big.
"I'll carry the potion for now," Ivan said. "Who carries the party treasury?"
"That's Rarity," Twilight said. "Wow, a real dungeon. So you think this place has a mad wizard, Marcus?"
"Or something equivalent. Mad druid, mad cleric. They're all mad and they enjoy making us jump through hoops for their amusement," I told her. "But the pay's good."
"We should just make sure nothing's going to jump on us," Spitfire said. "I know the temptation but we need to save our strength."
"I like mad wizards," Pinkie said cheerfully.
Of course you do, Pinkie.
I wanted to explore this place so bad, even knowing it would be full of mad wizard crazy stuff. "Oh yes, the second rule of dungeons. If you see someone you love or who is really sexy or attractive, they're probably covertly a monster."
"What if you hate them?" Pinkie asked.
"Monster."
She circled me widdershins. "And if you don't care about them?"
"Monster. If it moves and isn't part of the party, it's probably a threat. Except when it isn't," I said. Too much paranoia will get you too. "Also, sometimes monsters will disguise themselves as members of the party, which is one of the MANY reasons to NEVER split the party."
I just want the mad loot, damn it.
"That sounds dangerous," Pinkie said thoughtfully.
"High risk, high yield," I told her. Weirdly, knowing everything is deadly makes me less nervous. It means no surprises. Oh, the mad wizard THINKS that making something that says 'drink me, totally safe' actually turn you into a turnip is a surprise, but if you're experienced like me, you already knew it was a TRAP.
Because everything is.
"Best we not take too many chances," Twilight said. "Let's just scout quickly. I would love to go through this place and study it, but I don't want to risk us getting hurt before the dragon."
Hopefully the mad wizard is taking his beauty rest and won't notice and lock us in.
Though at least I'd be locked in with a good group this time. Last time I got locked in a dungeon, the group was made up of all greedy, foolish people except me. I'm not even sure HOW I got out alive.
I must have, or I'd be dead, but my last clear memory is a giant metal cow breathing on me. Some kind of weird mist. I would think I turned to stone, but I am not, in fact, stone.
Ergo, somehow I got out of that. I'd ask Ivan but he wasn't there.
It all started going to hell when the idiot monk decided to MOON a line of hobgoblins who had formed a line of pikemen.
Yeah, it went downhill from there.
*************
The southern hallway was painted with pictures of Ixion blessing crops and priests and villages, all faded and sometimes defaced. One painting, someone had put a mustache on EVERY single person. In a giant crowd scene. Men AND woman alike.
Eighty feet long, leading to a fifty by fifty room with a high ceiling and crumbly bits of wood on the floor. There were more devotional paintings in faded, peeling stucco. One of them, however, caught our attention; at the far end of the room, Celestia was depicted kneeling before Ixion as he patted her head. He was also drawn to be maybe twice her size. Which would make him HUGE.
The ponies stared, eyes wide. "I think that's blasphemy," Applejack muttered.
"It's probably propaganda to assert Ixion's primacy," Twilight said, frowning.
"It's a super-cute picture of Celestia when she was younger! Look at how awkward she looks," Pinkie said, running over and touching it, stroking her wings.
The floor suddenly rotated under Pinkie, and the wall too and now she was on the other side of the wall and now you could see an image of a purple and blue pony who was an alicorn like Celestia. An eight-legged pony alicorn with dark blue coat and white star speckles and a grey mane was snuggling up to Celestia and the other pony. Ixion and Odin stood nearby, conversing. Was that Sleipnir? The eight-legged pony, that is.
"It's Luna!," Twilight said.
Wait, that's Luna? This place is so old... what is going on?
Dammit, did I somehow miss the existence of a second God-Pony the whole time I lived in Canterlot? Has someone erased some of my memories? DAMMIT.
"We've got to rescue Pinkie before she does something foolish," Applejack said. "We can study made up wall paintin's later."
Pinkie said something muffled through the wall; Ivan got his mesh cup. "I think she's moving away from the wall," he said.
I tried pushing the wall, but neither Ivan nor I could get the wall to move.
*Dammit*.
"Let me try," Applejack said. She moved to where she could aim at the right edge of the segment which must be on a pivot and she kicked. Nothing happened and she stumbled away from the wall, having pushed herself instead of it. "Dammit."
Twilight now used St. Tarastia's Fire to limn the edge of the wall segment. "Ivan, try touching Celestia's wings."
"I get a slight tingly feeling but nothing happens," Ivan said.
Twilight tried touching it with her horn. "There's definitely a triggering spell but for some reason, I can't make it go off." She sounded frustrated.
"Try Luna's wings," Dash said.
All three alicorns gave Ivan a slight tingly feeling when touched them.
"We'd all best get in close," Twilight said. "Then, Ivan, try touching Ixion and Odin."
We all crammed into the rotating segment, bumping and poking each other, then Ivan touched Ixion and suddenly the wall spun, depositing us in a ten foot wide corridor that ran south more than our sixty foot light radius. Distantly, Pinkie shouted, "Haha, you'll never catch me!" I heard galloping and the sound of loud clanking, like someone in armor chasing her.
We ran down the corridor, which ran a total of seventy feet, then opened into an east-west corridor that was twenty feet wide. Thirty feet west of us, it turned south and east of us, it turned north after fifty feet. Across the hallway and just a little east of us, another twenty foot hallway ran south.
Pinkie noises came from west and south of us, so we ran off that way past paintings of many of the immortals. Ivan stared at one of them, which showed Asterius riding on Luna across a... well, lunar landscape, both of them laughing.
"That's Princess Luna, right?" I asked Twilight as we ran.
"It looks like her, but..." Twilight looked confused. "Let's catch up to Pinkie first."
The hallway forked; one part went west, then shrank to a narrower corridor; another branch went south, doing the same and a broad corridor ran southeast, with the sound of Pinkie down it. We kept on running.
We could see Pinkie now, being chased by a fifteen foot tall humanoid in plate armor. Pinkie was laughing. "Hi, everyone, chasing is fun!"
Golem? Frost giant or Fire giant, maybe? Probably a golem as it didn't talk and it moved jerkily and it didn't dress like a giant.
Which would make it an iron golem. SHIT.
Those things breathe poison and sometimes pull other crazy tricks. "I think it's an iron golem! They breathe poison and I think... dammit, something about lightning," I said.
"I didn't bring my guide to golems!" Twilight said frantically. "I've got six books on DRAGONS and more on swamp monsters!"
"He doesn't like pie!" Pinkie said.
Well, that narrows it down.
"We'll take him down!" Dash said. "Pegasus CHARGE!"
A triple Pegasi charge sent him tumbling through the air, over Pinkie, who crashed into him and fell down dazed. The Pegasi vanished out of sight down the tunnel which narrowed to ten feet ahead. Ivan rushed up, picked up Pinkie, then collapsed under her weight. "So much for being the hero," he mumbled.
"Sorry, I'll start a diet tomorrow," Pinkie mumbled.
It's not that Pinkie weighs more than the average Pony, it's that ponies are, in fact, heavier than they look. I'm stronger than Ivan and I wouldn't want to carry a pony very far. Also, he picked her up badly so he had to sustain all the weight with his arms.
The golem started to rise and Applejack leaped over Ivan and Pinkie, spun and back kicked it, knocking it back down, then jumped onto it and began kicking it all over.
Fluttershy looked around, looked a little frustrated, then began a soft song; I soon heard the scurrying of rats.
The hallway turned straight east here and dwindled down to a ten foot hallway further east; the Wonderbolts and Dash had vanished down it; I expect once they get to high speed they can't stop easily. Another tunnel ran off northeast, but it was only ten feet wide. The walls here showed a great feast of the immortals. Celestia was flanked by Luna and Sleipnir, themselves flanked by Asterius and Odin. If there's some sort of Asterius-Luna connection, then why hadn't I ever heard of Luna before this? Not that I'm a great scholar of religion, but I expect the average kobold knows about Odin and Sleipnir.
Maybe Ivan knows something.
I tried dumping my fire spell on the golem but the fire skittered off his armor like I had thrown marshmallows at him. Spike breathed on him, but it didn't work any better for him. "No lightning... no fire..." Twilight began to sweat.
"Save Pinkie and Ivan," Applejack said, still pounding dents into the golem. When it tried to get up, she knocked it down again, grinning. "Stay down, buckaroo, you won't buck ME off," she said to the golem.
Twilight evacuated Pinkie and Ivan, who now stumbled to their feet.
I heard bashing and shouting noises to the east. Oh bloody hell, they ran into another monster!
I limned the golem with Saint Tarastia's Fire. THAT, at least worked and would hopefully help Applejack aim.
Fluttershy now began talking to some rats, who had tiny squeaky voices. Twilight began paging through a book frantically while Spike consulted another one for her.
The golem now rotated its head 180 degrees and spat fire at Applejack, who dodged out of the way, bounced off the wall, and landed between us and the golem. "Okay, didn't expect it could turn its head *that* much," Applejack said. She busted out her lasso. "Pinkie, Marcus, I need a distraction."
Why ME?
Pinkie took my hands... somehow... then began to sing and we began jitterbugging around, dodging golem fists and fiery blasts, while Applejack darted about, apparently waiting for the perfect moment.
Distantly, Rainbow Dash shouted something about her ass.
Twilight sketched a map of the room, overlaid a circle on it (it was too big for the room), frowned and then went back to her book. "This would be so much easier if I could use the lightning balls," she said grumpily.
"I know, this sucks, golems SUCK," Spike said angrily.
I suddenly realized I had totally lost track of Rarity in this mess. Where was she? Had she fallen into a pit trap while we were running or something?
Dammit.
I lifted Pinkie up high briefly (I could only do this briefly), then dipped her low to avoid a burst of flame.
"And now," Rarity said to my surprise. She'd snuck behind the golem and now she fired arrows into the back of his elbows and knees. They broke through his shell and hit hard enough that they came out the front. He struggled with his joints locked.
Applejack struck, lassoing around his head and sealing his mouth shut and pulling him down. "Pinkie, two pony pull!" Pinkie ran up and with Ivan and I helping, we quickly secured rope around them and they took off running, dragging the golem by his head after them, crashing and banging. He couldn't get Rarity's arrows out as he couldn't focus on trying to snap them or pull them out. So he careened around, smashing into the walls, as they ran along laughing.
"Remind me not to piss off Applejack," I said weakly, watching this.
"Thank you for the fire, Marcus," Rarity said. "It helped me aim."
"It's about all I could do," I told her, sighing. "Very well done, my fair lady."
"I... Marcus..." she said a little nervously.
"We've got to go help Dash and the others while they dispose of the golem," Twilight said, Spike leaping onto her back. "CHARGE!"
I wish they were a little larger. As it stood, they charged off ahead of us, with Ivan and I lagging behind, though now Fluttershy came flying after us, having been so busy talking to rats, she'd not noticed the order to charge at first.
"The rats told me that there's a clay statue that sometimes moves around that way," Fluttershy said. "And a bronze statue that also moves. And a big, beautiful female rat, but she eats anyone who tries to hit on her." ...
Ivan laughed. "A were-rat?"
"Just a rat, but big," Fluttershy said. "Probably a Dire Rat. They're awfully mean." She clearly did not approve of this.
I saw a distant flash of light and heard more shouting and a loud THUNK I hoped was not a Pony.
"And this goes into a maze of small tunnels and hallways," Fluttershy said. "Some of the tunnels are only for rats."
"The rats can have their privacy," I said and Fluttershy smiled. I had been joking but I think she took it as kindness to rats.
That's Fluttershy.
I heard distant crashing and shouting far behind us; hopefully it's an iron golem working on dying. Not... I need to be less morbid.
The maze was actually easy to follow; just head for the sound of chaos. We ended up in a dead-end room; it was painted to resemble a storehouse, though anything stored in it had vanished long ago. The north wall had Ixion on it and the south wall Valerias; both were toting boxes.
I must admit that is NOT a theme I have ever seen before in religious art. I now noticed Luna and Celestia were on the east and west walls respectively, also helping to store things.
However, the actual content of the room was a giant clay statue of a monk. Dash and Soarin' were trying to fight its left and right arms respectively and Spitfire kept circling it and kicking it in the back. It had more balance than the iron golem, or maybe the Pegasi just don't have the same strength in their back legs as Applejack. They couldn't move very far to build up charging speed in here.
Rarity had shot a few arrows into it, but apparently its joints couldn't be locked up; it just fluidly flowed around the arrows. The Wonderbolts' blows didn't really hurt it either; it would just undent itself.
Fluttershy studied it. I asked her, "Can you make seeds sprout in it, maybe?"
"It's clay, not good for growing most things by itself," Fluttershy said. "It's too wet."
"Could we bake the water out with heat?" I asked.
"Oooh," Twilight said. "Rarity, I hate to ask you to do this, but I'm going to need you to keep it busy while I explain my plan to the Wonderbolts and Dash."
Rarity's eyes widened. She looked at it, but then she suddenly set her stance and pawed the ground with her left hoof determinedly. "I will," she said.
Spike looked panicked. "Rarity, that's really dangerous!"
She's going to get squished. I started to open my mouth and she looked at Spike and I determinedly. Is she trying... I don't know what she's thinking. Beyond being determined to show her strength. "Make your father proud," I told her. If she gets squished, I am going to be very unhappy.
She smiled at that. "I will." She turned. "Avaunt ye! I am Rarity, the daughter of Captain Keen Eyes and Silver Belle! The wrath of a unicorn is not something to be jested at!" She shouted at it and it turned its head to stare at her, and then she shot it in the eyes and charged, even as Twilight called the Wonderbolts and Dash back to our support. It rushed at her and she slipped between its legs, darting about as it tried to punch and kick her. It was clear its maker expected it to fight human-sized things, though; it couldn't easily punch something that low-slung and she managed to dodge its kicks, though every near impact made me wince.
Distantly, I heard crashing noises coming this way and hoped they weren't going to drag the iron golem in here.
Twilight and I now wove a huge fire spell, mixing it with a gout of flame from Spike and raising it up over the golem as Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire began to whirl around it, stirring the air. Unfortunately, it chose this moment to successfully connect with Rarity. She howled and went crashing into the wall.
Spike and I both freaked out and Twilight now got glowy-eyed and the flame roared up in potency falling down on the golem and warmed the air, which the Wonderbolts and Dash managed by rushing around it, forming a column of hot air which baked it thoroughly. It yelped and now it was baked stiff.
Rarity rose, studied it on wobbly legs, then shot four arrows into it. Cracks ran through it and it wobbled more, and then the Wonderbolts and Dash hit it and it shattered. Spike breathed fire on it and all the pieces vanished like...
"Spike, tell me you didn't just dump all the pieces on Celestia," I said.
Twilight looked horrified.
"Naah, I..uh... actually, I'm not sure where I sent it," he confessed.
I went over to Rarity, with Fluttershy following me. The Wonderbolts went over to Twilight and Dash joined us.
"You okay?" I asked Rarity. A stupid question; she got hit and it must hurt.
"You can help me treat her," Fluttershy said to me.
"It was nothing," Rarity said dismissively, then made an unhappy grunting noise.
Dash hovered over us, apologizing, while Fluttershy and I, along with Spike, who now joined us, worked on Rarity. She clearly enjoyed all the attention, sending Spike to get her a snack and a drink and then to fan her, while we worked on her. I felt better; she must be in good spirits.
The distant crashing was now replaced by distant shouting and Soarin' flew off with Dash. Spitfire now joined us. "So your father's a warpony?" Spitfire asked Rarity as she sipped from a straw in a cup of wine.
"Yes," Rarity said. "He's stationed at Grand Stalls and spends a lot of time dealing with orcs and goblins that come up from inside the plateau and handling merchants from Darokin. Mother is with him." There are three points on the plateau where train lines and merchant roads descend down to Darokin and up to the Plateau, to facilitate trade. (There's also a fair number which connect southern Equestria to the Plateau.) Stalliongrad, Grand Stalls, and Castle Neigh guard those three points.
"My Dad's in the army too," Spitfire said. "He's on the Elephant frontier." This is in southwestern Equestria on the border with the Empire of Sind. The Royal Elephant Corps of Sind lives on the other side of the border and sometimes pretends to be 'bandits' to test the strength of Equestria's defenses and the Equestrian military then 'pretends' to beat them up. Or sometimes 'pretends' to get whipped, admittedly. There used to be dwarves living in that region a long time ago, but elephant raids wiped them out, or so I hear. I just know if you say 'Boatmurdered' to a Dwarf, he kicks you in the balls and then whips your ass.
The Sindhi wobble back and forth between 'let's be friends who trade' and 'quadrupeds exist to serve those of high caste, KNEEL BEFORE THE RADHIRAJAH'. Oh, and 'don't mind us, we're killing each other'.
"I'm guessing the Elephants really hate him," I told her. "Given they are low mobility and can't fly."
"They carry archers on their back," Spitfire said. "If the humans there weren't such asses about insisting quadrupeds are lower caste than those with two legs, I'd be impressed by them."
I laughed softly at that. Rarity was carefully studying my knees, which seemed to be fine. Well, I'd worry about that later.
"Have you ever shapechanged?" she asked me. "Oh wait, you mentioned you had."
"Yes," I told her. "I spent several hours as a cat as part of an infiltration. I was amazed by how nimble I was." I held down the bandage while Fluttershy applied a little bit of something sticky to the ends to hold it on. There was some padding under it and a salve for the bruise now starting to form on Rarity's side. I hated to see her hurt but adventuring is dangerous. Honestly, it could have been MUCH worse.
"I've seen cats fall. They twist around in the air to always land on their feet," Spitfire said.
"Actually, it depends on how far they fall whether they manage to twist in time," Fluttershy asked, now singing softly with her hooves glowing. She gently stroked Rarity's injuries, which made Rarity shiver, but I could see her slowly relaxing.
"Did you enjoy it?" Rarity asked me curiously.
"It was kind of fun until they turned the dogs on us," I told her. "I've been a bird too. I nearly got shot with a bow but that time I dodged all the attacks. Flying is very cool."
"You thinking of something clever to do with shifting?" Spitfire asked Rarity.
Rarity blinked, then said, "Fluttershy, would it be natural for rats to be inside a dragon's cave?"
"If he left bits of food, yes. Rats can't steal treasure, so the dragon would pay them no mind," Fluttershy said. "And they're too small to be worth eating, any more than you'd eat a beetle or an ant."
I won't mention some Sindhi make candied beetles. As I'd rather not actually know that.
"So you're thinking you and Marcus should turn into rats and sneak in and spy it out?" Spitfire said. "Hmm, not bad idea. ...
"Actually, I was thinking Fluttershy could talk to the local rats and see if they knew anything."
I gave a sigh of relief at that proposal.
Applejack and Pinkie returned, then Applejack pulled an odd thing out of her bag. It was three dozen gems wired together with gold, silver, copper, and platinum wire in a complex pattern. "Golem brain, I guess," she said. "I figger Rarity can pick it apart."
She smiled. "Thank you, Applejack, I will later." She tucked it into her bag. "If the clay golem had anything valuable, it vanished with the fire."
"I'm sorry," Spike said, hanging his head.
"You were protecting me and that was very kind of you," Rarity said to him. She reached in her bag and pulled the weird thing back out, pried out a gem, and let Spike eat it. "Thank you," she said.
He smiled brightly. "Mmm, that was good." Spike watched her put the rest of the gems and the frame away.
Rarity rose. "I think I'm ready. We should go get some rest; I think we've had enough trouble for one day."
We decided to head back, even though I was rather curious to poke around this place more. I love exploring; I just hate the inevitable beatings which come with it.
*************
We set up camp in the room at the base of the stairs, put up wards, made dinner and relaxed and rested. Rarity spent her time sketching outfits for stallions and working with her new gems. Twilight and Spike and I spent a lot of time fiddling with that secret door.
Study showed Pinkie could rotate it by touching Celestia, Twilight by touching Ixion, Fluttershy by touching Luna, Ivan, Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire by touching Sleipnir, myself and Rarity by touching Odin, which surprised me. Applejack could open the door by touching it anywhere gently but not by force.
"I must admit I do not see myself in a one-eyed man with a spear," Rarity confessed.
"Nor I," I confessed.
"I only vaguely know about Odin, beyond him being a really ancient immortal and he put out his eye for wisdom," Twilight said.
"Sounds more like you, Twilight," Pinkie said thoughtfully. "Did he put a cupcake in the empty socket?"
"Probably not," Ivan said. "So this Luna is Celestia's sister?"
"Yes," Twilight said very firmly. "Her dear younger sister, who raises and lowers the moon."
I know Twilight has to know better than that. I guess she toes the party line in public, though, which disappoints me a little.
Not that I'm going to start a fight over it; not worth it. Pick your fights to have a point to them.
"Are they related to Sleipnir?" Ivan asked.
"I hadn't heard him mentioned but it makes sense," Twilight said.
"She said she was his sister in her letter to me," I said.
Twilight blinked and I wondered why she'd let that out. Had she known we'd come here?
My brain started churning on conspiracy theories, which kept me busy a while.
***************
We all finished dinner and were now quite tired.
"We should sleep," Twilight said. "In the morning, it should only be a short trip to the river and the dragon's lair."
"He lives in the river?" Pinkie asked.
"By it, according to Celestia's intelligence report," Twilight said. "There's a lizardman village and an underground river; he lives in a cave up the river, underground with the lizardmen guarding the entrance."
And then we get eaten.
Though maybe... aaargh. Can't flee. Probably can't survive not fleeing. If we succeed, eventually the truth will out.
Then Twilight will use her secret technique to turn me into a potato.
"I wish I could take a bath," Twilight said.
"I know," Rarity said. "That boat was so nice to stay on," she said dreamily.
"Agreed," I told her. "Nice soft beds."
"Nice comfortable baths," Rarity said.
"Fresh lemon scented soap and nice soft towels," I said wistfully.
For some reason, Dash was just GRINNING at me, so I grinned back and got a hoof up.
I am not sure why, but I don't argue with compliments.
"I like pie," Soarin' said. "Good pies on that boat."
Spitfire, amused, patted his shoulder. "Yep."
"Okay, here's the watch order," Twilight said and we all got ready for bed.
************
You may have noticed we gave up before we checked out the eastern hallway from the main room. We didn't notice, we were all tired and ready for bed. I counted myself lucky to be on third watch, as it meant hours of uninterrupted sleep. YES.
Until I realized this meant it was me, Spitfire, and Pinkie. Spitfire's cool, but this meant HOURS with a VERY BORED Pinkie.
I sat back to back with Pinkie, her watching the west tunnel, me watching the east and Spitfire idly zipping around but basically watching the south. "So what do humans do for fun?" Pinkie asked me.
"Play cards, dance, sing, make things, have parties. A lot of the same things ponies do. We do a lot of things Ponies have a harder time doing, though, like climbing things or sleight of hand," I said.
"What's that?" Spitfire asked.
I got my cards out and shuffled. "Pick a card."
Pinkie drew with her teeth. "Mrphl."
"Okay, that's the Four of Stones. Put it back."
She put it back in and I shuffled, manipulating the cards, then flipped the top card over. The Four of Stones. "Ta da!" I said.
I did it three more times; they couldn't keep up, of course. Then I did some simple tricks with coins and rings. "And none of it is magic, just dexterity with my fingers," I told them. I doffed my hat and now pulled a cupcake out of it, which I'd snuck out of Pinkie's bags when she wasn't looking. "Here you go," I said, handing it back to her.
"Wow, this looks just like one I would make!"
"You did," I told her. "Sleight of hand at work."
"Why learn all that when you can do magic?" Spitfire asked.
"I had a knack, especially with card tricks, from when I was little," I told Spitfire. "And I loved gambling with cards too." I'm a pretty good card player.
"I then learned some magic, but I'm not a great wizard like Twilight," I told them. "But I do a lot of things moderately well instead of doing one thing really well the way Ponies usually do. I do a little sword fighting, I can break into things but not as well as Ivan, I can dance pretty well, but not as well as a pro, and so on."
"I noticed you work with Twilight a lot," Spitfire mused, while now Pinkie was trying to duplicate my card tricks; instead, cards flew everywhere. Ponies without TK really can't easily duplicate sleight of hand.
Spitfire and I couldn't help but laugh as Pinkie rolled around in a mess of cards, trying to get them all together. "Come back here! Get along little cardie!"
"Not too loud, we'll wake the others," I said.
"The essence of spell levels, used to determine thaum consumption, is based on the frequency at which the spell vibrates," Twilight mumbled, gesticulating in her sleep.
I remember seeing her deliver a twenty minute lecture in her sleep once, one time we both fell asleep on her floor and then I later woke up when she started telling her elbow about acids. I smiled fondly at the memory.
Spitfire gave me an odd look. I instinctively checked my pants. Tattoo not showing. Surely me smiling at Twilight didn't make her remember something about that PEARL.
I'd forgotten she and Soarin' have their own reasons to kill me.
"Aaargh, this isn't the Three of Flames," Pinkie said, staring at the Six of Winds and looking frustrated.
"How long have you known Twilight?" Spitfire asked.
"She and her friends saved me from horrible death just a few days ago, which is when I met them all," I told her. FUCK she suspects something!
Spitfire nodded, then stared off down the hallway. "Pinkie, forget the cards, we should keep watch." She looked lost in thought.
Damn me, I thought.
I looked down the hallway just in time to see a half dozen giant spiders on the ceiling coming our way. "SPIDERS!" I shouted and everyone stirred. Dash began swatting them in her sleep. Swatting imaginary ones in her sleep, that is.
Applejack and Ivan were up in a few seconds, even if they were swaying groggily. Spike and Twilight somehow slept through that, and Rarity and Soarin' groggily began to get up.
The wards now went off, waking Twilight and Spike. As the spiders came on, Twilight hurled lightning balls at them; two went tumbling out of sight and the rest scattered. I nailed one of them with a lightning ball, feeling VERY proud of myself. Then Rarity nailed it in the eye and it ran off, though she pulled her arrow back out.
Applejack quickly punted one off down the hallway, and Spitfire collided with another, sending him tumbling. Ivan got pounced on by a sixth one, but Pinkie threw jelly at its eyes, blinding it, then back kicked it off him.
Pretty soon, they all fled, and Applejack said, "Crazy spiders roaming around at three in the mornin'."
"Oh, dungeons are full of roaming monsters, intended to make it hard to rest," I told her.
"'Cause of the mad wizards," she said, frowning.
"Yes. They enjoy watching panicked parties wake up," I told her.
"I need my beauty sleep," Rarity complained.
"He probably likes seeing you bedraggled, unlike me. But I know you are a true lady, whatever the circumstances."
She smiled weakly. "And you are a true gentleman, Marcus." She yawned. "So tired."
"Sleep well, fair lady, knowing we are watching over you as you rest," I said grandiosely and she smiled.
"Goodnight, Marcus. Thank you." Rarity now curled up and I pulled her blanket over her and she went to sleep.
Spitfire was definitely watching me out of one eye. I let it slide; any discussion would just risk exposing secrets.
She kept eying me the rest of our watch, while Pinkie yammered on about spiders and kept trying helplessly to duplicate my card tricks until she got bored of that. THEN she wanted a sing-a-long (not a good idea when people are sleeping), and after that, she really started to spaz. Spitfire looked ready to just go axe crazy on her by the time we made breakfast for everyone and then woke everyone up.
Rarity and I helped each other assume some vague semblance of presentableness. I also got roped into brushing Fluttershy's mane by Rarity, and Applejack as well, though Applejack tried to resist it. But really, her hair needed a good brushing.
As I worked on it, Twilight came over to me. "Marcus, I need to talk to you."
"Fire away," I said.
She took me over to Ivan and sat us down.
"I have prepared something for you for an emergency, as I have a request to make," she said.
She handed me a shimmering red feather. "This is a phoenix feather," she said. "I've stored a flight spell inside it. When we actually approach the lair for real and try to negotiate, you, Ivan, Spitfire and Soarin' will remain concealed. If he attacks, they'll commit to the fight but you and Ivan will need to stay hidden. If it looks like he's going to capture us or... worse... You two will have to escape, then use the flight spell and go to Canterlot and tell Celestia we failed and need a rescue mission." She sounded nervous. "Ideally, it won't come to that, but I want to keep an 'ace in the hole', as I think you'd put it. And hopefully, he won't expect either of you two to exist or have reason to look for you."
Part of me said 'YES!'. I would have a Twilight-powered escape route and no need to risk battle. The other part knew that hiding the whole time would curry no favor and the third part didn't want to hide while my party was in danger.
CRAZY THIRD PART.
"I'd feel awful running off with the rest of you in danger," Ivan said, frowning.
Noble, yet suicidal.
"The same for me," I said. I'd actually feel awful (from fear) if I stayed, awful from worrying about them if I fled. Ugh.
"I know," she said. "But if all goes wrong, someone has to be positioned to escape."
I sighed. "I feel bad being the one but it's a good plan."
"Thank you," she said, smiling. "Hopefully, it won't come to violence, but we'll see." She rose. "Okay, let's get closer to them, then it's time to see if Fluttershy can get any rats to talk."
************
We all crept up to within half a mile of the lizardman village by the river. It was up on stilts, a town for maybe two, three hundred lizardmen, a total of eighty or so buildings on stilts connected by raised walkways with a large central plaza and docks for canoes on the river. It was pretty impressive for lizardmen, really.
There was a hill nearby the village. A stream flowed out of the cave, which was huge, maybe a hundred feet across with the stream filling about sixty of those feet. There were four lizardman guards, armed with spears on duty in front of the cave.
Fluttershy sang a song and some rats came. They paused and studied her, which made me wonder what was wrong. She kept singing, though, and they came up to her. "Hello, my little friends," she said, smiling cheerfully. Then she tossed each of them a scrap of fish and oohed and aahed over them as they ate.
"Can you tell us about the dragon and his cave?" Fluttershy said cheerfully.
"Squeak, squeaaaak, squeak."
"But I didn't go into the cave," Fluttershy said in confusion. "This is the first time I've been here."
"Squeak, squeeaaaakkkk, ssssqueaaak."
"But I don't have a flying carpet," Fluttershy said, then flapped her wings and flew. "See, I don't need one."
"Squeak, SQUeak, squeaaaak."
"Okay, yes, most of my friends don't fly, but I promise you, I haven't gone in the cave," she said in confusion.
"Can you find out if there were duplicates of Ivan and I?," I asked, frowning.
"Was it just me?" Fluttershy asked.
More squeaking ensued.
"They say it was all of us," Fluttershy said.
"It has to be dopplegangers," I said, frowning.
"It could be...," Ivan began.
If it is the infamous doppleganger-elf-trolls, I am going to cry but I am quite sure that acid and falling into the elemental plane of fire should have killed them ALL.
"Maybe the remaining Glantrians disguised themselves as us," Rainbow Dash mused.
"They'd have to be hell of disguise masters," Spitfire said. "I guess they could polymorph."
"They'd have to get reinforcements for five people to impersonate... ten," Ivan said.
"Thirteen if you count my extra personalities," Pinkie said.
Fluttershy continued talking to the rats.
Twilight, Spike, and I started consulting her books for anything on dopplegangers. Pinkie began rooting around in Twilight's saddlebags, then overbalanced and fell in. (Remember, dimensional space.)
Rarity stuck her head in and pulled her out. Pinkie now clutched a book. "This is it! This will solve our problems!"
Twilight twitched. "Pinkie, there's no way..." Then she STARED at the book.
It was _Tales of Forbidden Pony Love_ by someone named 'Passionate Heart'.
Spike buried his face in his hands.
"Oh my," Rarity said, grinning in exactly the same way Rainbow Dash and Applejack were. Fluttershy turned red and hid her face. Ivan stared, eyes wide. Pinkie said, "All you need is love, right?"
"PINKIE!" Twilight yanked it and shoved it back in her saddlebags. "That's... I hadn't cataloged that yet," she mumbled.
"At least it's not stuff she wrote herself," Rainbow Dash pointed out.
"That's enough teasing," I said. I didn't like seeing her so embarrassed. "We have to figure out what is going on here and mocking Twilight for enjoying a love story or two won't help."
"Thank you," Twilight said gratefully.
"We all have our little foibles, Marcus darling," Rarity said to me.
"I know," I said, sighing. I don't like seeing her hurt AND I don't want people to poke the magical volcano with a stick until it goes off.
Pinkie hugged Twilight. "You know I love you."
"I love you too," Twilight mumbled, smiling embarrassedly.
"Obviously, they are alternate universe versions of us where we never became friends and so all of us are twisted parodies of ourselves!" Pinkie said.
"But why would we be working together if we were not friends?" Applejack asked. "I'd be in Manehattan."
"I'd be on a rock farm," Pinkie said gloomily.
"Probably Nightmare Moon would rule the world and everyone would be dead or zombies or something," Rainbow Dash said.
"Nightmare Moon?" I asked.
"We can't talk about it, state secret," Twilight said, sounding very guilty.
"Does this have something to do with that eclipse?" I asked. The Summer Solstice of 1000 AC had been marked by a several day long lunar eclipse over Brun. It was completely unnatural and had triggered a massive panic. Then it just kind of stopped.
I'd heard a million crazy rumors about it.
"I... maybe...," Twilight mumbled.
Pinkie waved a hoof in front of her mouth, then shut it tight.
"It was Nyx, wasn't it?" Ivan said, frowning. "One of her crazy plots to snuff out the sun, right?" Nyx is a female Immortal of Entropy; she wants eternal night so her undead can flourish. From her perspective, turning everyone into undead would be GOOD for us.
"Something like that," Applejack said.
Twilight looked thoughtful, then shook her head. "We are going to have to confront them."
"Wait... how did they get past the guards?" I asked.
"The guards let them in," Fluttershy said after a rat consult.
We got all the rat clues we could. The group looked exactly like us, including Spike too. EXCEPT they flew up on a flying carpet, which other-Pinkie then stashed in her bags. The lizardmen just let them in after other-Fluttershy asked them nicely.
"Flying Carpets usually come from Ylarum or Alphatia, though the Ethengars also like them," I said thoughtfully.
"Maybe someone wants a Dragon-Equestria war," Ivan mused.
"Maybe it's us, time-traveling!" Pinkie said.
"Sugarcube, there ain't no such thing," Applejack said.
"Actually, people who quest for immortality in the Sphere of Time ALWAYS time travel as part of it," Ivan said. "And have to find a time travel artifact."
We all stared at him.
"Hey, I...uh... have an interest in that," Ivan said weakly. "I CAN read, you know."
"But why would we even time travel to now?" Twilight said.
"To stop ourselves doing something TERRIBLE," Pinkie said.
"But that would mean we would have no reason in the future to time travel back and so we would do something terrible," Spike said. "Then go back and stop ourselves. Lose motive, don't go back in time, so we DO something..." He was starting to wobble.
"Enough loopin'," Applejack said. "I think someone's planning to..."
KABOOM.
There was a huge explosion and the sound of chaos down the tunnel.
SHIT.
************
We took off running towards the cave entrance. The four lizardmen guards stared at us in confusion, and then I heard distant maniacal laughter; it sounded like Rarity if she was really drunk and gleeful.
And then people who looked JUST like us came zooming out of the cave, riding on a huge flying carpet piled with treasure. 'Pinkie' was driving the carpet, perched in front with her hooves on a golden eye shape woven into the front of the carpet which flickered with a spectrum of colors. 'Marcus' and 'Twilight' were gloating over a pile of books together. 'Rarity' was busy decking herself out in jewelry and laughing like a MANIAC. 'Spike' was busy helping her bedeck herself. 'Applejack' was chewing an apple; she spit the seeds like... something that spits seeds. Anyway, they hit the guards and 'Fluttershy' sang a song that caused the seeds to turn into vines... vines? From apples? Anyway, the vines tangled up the guards. 'Ivan' was twirling lock picks in his hands and grinning. The 'Wonderbolts' and 'Dash' were flying alongside instead of riding, executing fancy maneuvers and showing off.
"Stop! What are you doing?" Twilight shouted at them.
"I'm RICH!" 'Rarity' screamed at the top of her lungs. 'Spike' gave a double thumbs up and continued covering her in jewelry.
"Spike, I am not like that, right?" Rarity said weakly to Spike.
"I am totally like that," he mumbled.
"What?" she said.
"STOP!" Twilight shouted.
I could hear chaos and doom coming and now the Wonderbolts and Dash simply launched themselves at the carpet without waiting for orders.
They went flying off over the hill and across the swamp in pursuit as the rest of us now got to face AN ANGRY DRAGON which had just emerged. Vermicoritax was dozens of feet long and had a huge long tail and a black spiky head, with opalescent black scales and sharp, pointy claws. He is probably one of the most... no, actually, I think he IS the most hideously dangerous thing I've ever faced, not counting the Roaring Demon, since it was actually an illusion.
For which I am very grateful.
Okay, Celestia is actually more dangerous, but I ran for the hills, rather than 'faced' her.
And Brannart. I would expect Brannart could, at least if he planned ahead, take this. Possibly with the help of an army of undead and his weird glowy magic, but he'd do it.
The fact I wish Brannart was here is a sign of how BAD this is.
Vermicoritax was about to spit a huge gout of acid at us; Twilight had used her acid-protection ritual on us but I feared it might have been stretched too far protecting this many, though I'd helped her.
"WAIT!" Spike said. "That wasn't us! We've been impersonated! I swear on my honor as a dragon!" He put his hand over his heart.
"I am an envoy from Princess Celestia and Princess Luna!" Twilight said frantically, pulling out and displaying her credentials. "I am Twilight Sparkle, her disciple!"
"That's what the one who JUST ROBBED ME said," Vermicoritax said angrily.
Instead of killing us all.
I live five more minutes. YES!
"I assure you that it's true," Fluttershy said urgently. "My rat friends saw it all!"
"I can't be sure you're telling the truth about what they say," Vermicoritax said.
"Fluttershy ain't no liar," Applejack said hotly. "I am the Element of Honesty and I tell you, Fluttershy is tellin' the truth!" Her element flashed and Vermicoritax jumped slightly, then his eyes widened. His gaze flickered across...
Only now did it hit me that Twilight was not actually wearing a necklace like the others. What did her Element look like?
There was a distant rumble of thunder and now we could see a huge storm tossing down lightning and rain pouring down north of here, where our friends had gone to chase our evil twins or whatever they are.
"The Elements of Harmony," he said softly, then looked at Twilight.
She looked nervous, then concentrated and a tiara appeared on her forehead. I could feel the POWER. Twilight's stance shifted, growing more confident. I bet she could make him a potato with that. Though Dragons do tend to resist magic well.
"I am the Element of Magic," Twilight said, eyes glowing with white light. "We come not in war, but in peace."
"Then swear to recover what is stolen from me. And I will wait and see," he said. "If you recover it, ALL of it, then we can talk. I will wait one month, and then I will invade Equestria to make up my losses."
You know, there's no way these doubles have their own Elements... right? So once we catch them, there's gonna be a beating tonight.
"We will swear," Twilight said.
Because I am an idiot, I didn't think about how this oath would be MAGICALLY BINDING until I felt huge amounts of power course through me. SHIT.
Well, at least it's mainly an oath to clobber some people who are less powerful copies or dopplegangers or something of us. And not to, say, steal Vanya's underwear or something. (For those unfamiliar, she is an Immortal of War and Conquest. Robbing her would be dangerous to say the least.)
I hope they're less powerful.
"We WILL recover your stolen treasure," Spike said very seriously.
Or die. Or die recovering it.
But hey, I live MORE than five minutes! YES!
The storm continued to rage north of us. This isn't going to be fun at all.
We took off as fast as we could towards it, though we could no longer see the doppleganger-pony-trolls or whatever they are. Or our friends.
They'd better be okay. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book Three (White Plume Mountain): Part 1: I Have a Mouth But Never Speak | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 3: White Plume Mountain
Part 1: I Have a Mouth But Never Speak
By John Biles
***************
Have you ever wondered if Rainbow Dash could break a tree with her head?
The answer is yes. I can't actually prove it was her head, but that's where she had the bruise.
We found her knocked out next to a tree snapped in half. Soarin' was floating on top of quicksand on his back. Spitfire lay in a pile of broken rocks, mumbling about bad breath.
Ivan and I helped Fluttershy get them onto secure, dry land, then we helped her treat their injuries, with Spike also helping. Twilight began paging through several books frantically. Dash had something in her mouth... some of her own hair?
"Got her," Dash moaned. "Stupid fake me."
"You did well, you should rest."
"Give Twilight... hair..." she moaned.
G... OH. "It's from fake Dash?"
"Stupid Rainbow Crash," Dash said, then laughed weakly, making noises I didn't like. "Yes, give... Twi..."
"I will," I said, bringing it to her and explaining.
"Ahah! Perfect! Thank you, Rainbow Dash!" Twilight said.
"Tell Soarin', he can have my memorabilia," Rainbow Dash mumbled.
"You are not going to die," Fluttershy said firmly. "It just may feel like it."
Soarin' mumbled about how tall the cloud was.
"With this, I can make a tracking spell," Twilight said, triumphantly.
"Fluttershy, can you get them good to travel?" I asked.
"They're going to need rest," she said. "If we wait until tomorrow..."
"That ain't gonna work," Applejack said. "They're bookin' it. We've got to go NOW, storm or not."
The storm had actually moved north; I suspect they're using it as a shield, centered on themselves. It was only drizzling here now.
"Twilight, enlarge me. I can carry Rainbow Dash," I said. "We can make a travois and Applejack and Pinkie should be able to pull the Wonderbolts."
"'m good, I can fly," Dash said, flapping her wings weakly.
"Make a what?" Applejack said. "That sounds like that hoity-toity stuff they have in Prance."
Prance is the most pretentious of the provinces of Equestria, though Big Apple Province tries hard. Mareis is the capital of the Province of Prance; among other things, it's the center for fashion or even just ordinary clothing. Their wine is also excellent.
"Hoity-Toity is a very important designer!," Rarity said defensively. "And a travois is a kind of sledge for hauling things. I will make us one. Marcus, I need you to assist me. Spike, you too."
"Okay," I said. "You can enlarge me once we finish," I told Twilight. "I will carry Dash."
"I'm fine," Dash said stubbornly, but moved only weakly.
"You carried me," I told her. "Now I am going to carry you and that is that. Let me help you."
"Okay, fine, if you insist," Dash said, then went to sleep.
Ivan and Pinkie helped Fluttershy, while Twilight consulted her books and Spike and I helped Rarity make a travois. She looked VERY proud when she used the ritual which Dona Carlotta told her to summon some canvas to make it with. Being Rarity, of course, it got a nice soft down lining with silk topping it on the side they'd lay on.
"Spike," I told him. "Good job, man. You saved our bacon."
"Bacon...," he said, drooling for a moment. Then he gave me an odd look. "Uh, thanks." We were each basically holding the layers in place so that Rarity could stitch them telekinetically, since she didn't have her sewing machine and we had to hold it all up out of the muck. Though here, the land was dryer, thankfully.
Twilight borrowed one of Rarity's gems and somehow put the hairs inside it and enchanted it, then tried to wear it on a thread; Rarity forced her to make a proper necklace that would look nicer.
Soon, we were ready to roll. Twilight enlarged me and I hefted Rainbow Dash over one shoulder. "You sleep and get better," I told her.
"'m fine," she mumbled.
Fluttershy sung a lullaby that put her to sleep and nearly put me to sleep too.
"We could probably put her on the travois," Applejack said. "Pinkie and I could probably haul most of the group if it was big enough."
"I'm fine," I said. "I owe her a ride." Favor currying for the win and it makes me look better. Soon, she was asleep and mumbling about winning some race into my chest, which amused me.
Fortunately for us, our foes kept up their storm or at least, the storm, our foes, and us were all headed in the same direction. This took us for a while across thankfully dry land, but then everything sloped down and we had to slog through muck with a travois. The storm moved out of sight but we kept on following 'Rainbow Crash' and her friends, hoping they hadn't split up.
Unfortunately, the river we now came to was broad and about ten feet deep. Pushed up to nearly twelve feet high by Twilight's magic, I had to carry each of the sleeping ponies across while everyone else swam. Then we set our travois up again and made our way across the filthy mire.
We kept going relentlessly, stopping briefly for lunch and dinner, pushing on until exhaustion was too much. We found a higher spot and fell down on it. Probably something should have eaten us for not posting watches, though Twilight did put up wards.
We were filthy and still tired in the morning but we couldn't stop, much as Rarity and I clearly both were unhappy with being covered with filth. No one else looked too happy with it, but we pushed on. Fortunately, our three Pegasi were now recovered and took to the air to scout.
My shoulders ached from carrying a Pegasus all day. Ponies are MUCH heavier than you'd think. Rainbow Dash weighs more than me for all that I'm much taller.
I sat down kind of hard at lunch time and just flopped down. Never carrying a Pony again EVER.
"C'mon, Marcus, it's just walking," Applejack said, a little chidingly.
"My shoulders ache," I said.
"Lie down on your stomach," Fluttershy said.
I did so; I was already so filthy, I couldn't get more filthy. Applejack, Pinkie and Ivan began making lunch.
I felt very gentle pressure on my shoulders. I also could see Rainbow Dash lurking nearby. "Fluttershy, you can't massage him if you just gently tap his shoulders."
"But if I put my full weight on it, it'll hurt," Fluttershy said softly.
"Let me do this," Rainbow Dash said.
She took a deep breath... and then began battering my back and I began howling fit to wake the dead. Fluttershy said, "I don't think that's how it works," and looked horrified.
"It felt like that," Dash said hesitantly and kept pounding. I don't think you even can massage someone's butt. And it wasn't the problem here.
"Stop," Spitfire said to Rainbow Dash. "I'll do this."
"But..." Dash protested.
"I know what I'm doing. Assuming he isn't dead," Spitfire said.
"I just wanted to help," Dash mumbled. Fluttershy led her away and I laid there moaning as Spitfire worked on me.
"It doesn't hurt that much," Spitfire told me chidingly.
Kiss my ass.
"Easy for you to say," I mumbled.
Dash winced and Fluttershy continued to talk to her softly.
Rarity settled down next to me and began carefully cleaning my face as Spitfire worked on me and I made noises. "Thank you," I mumbled. "I'll do you when Spitfire is done."
"You're welcome, Marcus," she said warmly and I started to feel a little more human. "We have a wonderful spa in Ponyville," she continued, the cloth working my face with her power behind it. "I will take you and Fluttershy there when we get back."
"I might go with you if I have time," Spitfire said. "I love a good massage."
She was, in fact, good at it; my pain was gradually fading and now I felt a blessed lassitude.
I gradually sank into slumber.
****************
I felt much more alive when I woke up at dinner time; we were at the very verge of the swamp and the land was rising into drier hills. Off a little to the northwest of us rose the fearsome sight of White Plume Mountain.
FUCK. "We have to go there, right?" I said weakly.
"That about sums it up," Twilight said.
White Plume Mountain is about three-fifths of a mile across and eight hundred or so feet tall; a geyser shoots out of the top creating a stream that flows down the south face and then down into the swamp, yellow with sulfur and other effluvia. The slopes are home to scrub brush and strange fungi, and at places, there are cracks through which steam continually vents. There's a huge crevice on the south slope. I could see someone had erected a sign over it, but it was too far away to read.
"It says 'Evil Lair of Evil Pinkamena, Inquire Within. No Halflings with Hats Allowed,' on the sign," Dash told me.
"I am NOT a halfling," I said. Unless you count the time I drank that stupid shrinking potion.
"You, uh, feeling better?" Dash said.
"Yes," I told her. "Thanks for helping me."
"It didn't go so well," Dash said to a nearby bush.
"Yes, but it's the thought that counts," I told her. "I wouldn't even start to know where or how to massage a pony beyond the shoulders." I had to help Twilight out a few times back in the day. It seemed to help. "You're a good friend."
That made her smile. SCORE.
Which reminds me, gotta work on Applejack some on this trip too. Some ponies are easier to curry favor with than others.
Dinner was served. Fish again, but fish is good. They had stew and we had stew with fish added. Oh yes, this was tasty.
"This is pretty obviously a trap," I said. "We should circle the volcano, make sure they are actually inside."
"I'll take Twilight," Dash said. "Once my stomach settles."
"Hmm, if this one is named Pinkamena instead of Pinkie," I began.
"My full name is Pinkamena Diane Pie," Pinkie said, pausing from slurping stew. Watching Ponies eat is a weird thing. Rarity and Twilight eat with a spoon but the rest just slurp it out of the bowl. Of course, with no hands, what else are they going to do? They could use a spoon with their hooves, but it's a lot easier to do it this way. It's one of those reminders they are Ponies, though.
"We can probably assume they've activated the old traps and things, but haven't had much time to install new ones," I said. "Unless their boss has been setting this up a long time, but then..." I scratched my head. "I don't know. I've never visited the place but from the stories I've heard, it's pretty dangerous."
"Didn't someone kill Keraptis a few years ago?" Twilight said, frowning and trying to remember. "The Company of the Silver Spear?"
"They're Ponies, right?" I said. I'd heard of them vaguely. "I think Keraptis has been reported dead at least eight times."
"Yes," Twilight said. "Largely retired now."
"Or dead," Spitfire said flatly. "We're going to have to do better this time or we'll join them." She looked at Pinkie. "No going off to play tag with Iron Golems."
"Sorry!," Pinkie said, clearly not at all sorry.
"She's right," I said. "Keraptis is your classic insane wizard who does things like build giant clocks that turn people into cheese."
"Why cheese?" Applejack asked, frowning.
"Too much staring into other dimensions and trying to replace every inch of his body with shadow-stuff. Why shadow-stuff? Because no one's done it yet," I said. "Really powerful wizards tend to either become immortals, become insane dungeon lords, or turn into something freaky. Or a combination of two or more of the above."
Twilight licked her lips nervously. "Any idea what's in it?"
"Weapons," Ivan said. "Keraptis liked stealing weapons, then watching people who tried to recover them die in his traps."
"The dragon's...we did get an actual LIST... no, we didn't," I said, facepalming. "Spike, can you mail Vermicoritax and ask him for a list of stolen items?"
We got the list before bedtime. He had listed EVERY coin separately with a TWO LINE DESCRIPTION. Things like 'Darokinian Double Crown, minted 983 AC, three scratches on the rim, rare error means both faces are the same, showing the Chancellor'. Or 'Bronze coin, unknown origin, over 1500 years old, shows pyramid on one side, man with two staves and ugly hat on the other face'.
"Wow, it's a Nithian coin," Twilight said excitedly.
"What's that?" Applejack said.
"They were an ancient civilization destroyed by the Immortals for some unknown reason, about fifteen hundred years ago," Twilight said excitedly.
"Blackmoor?" Spike asked.
"Blackmoor blew itself up," Twilight said. "I wish he'd included the inscription. I could probably... no wait, my book's back home." She sighed. "This was before the forging of iron became commonplace."
"So this coin could blow the mountain up?" Spike asked.
I certainly hope not.
"The Immortals destroyed them because they were entire deficient in fun," Pinkie said. "They were just trying to drop a giant pie on them for a nation-wide 'pie to the face' gag, but it got out of hand."
Sadly, it is not clear if Pinkie is right or wrong.
I *hope* she is wrong, though.
"Maybe we could use the Polymorph potion to psych them out by turning into doubles of them," Rainbow Dash mused.
"How would anyone tell?" Applejack said. "They're doubles of US."
"Maybe we're their GOOD twins," Pinkie mused. "And we've just imagined our pasts and none of us existed until we encountered Marcus and Ivan in the swamp."
"I really doubt it, sugarcube," Applejack said. "Why would someone go to these lengths?"
"Just guessing," Pinkie said.
We continued to speculate into the night as the moon came out and the stars. It was a half moon, fading towards the new moon, but the stars shine very brightly here.
Rarity and I went to the river and engaged in futile acts of cleaning. It felt good to be even a little cleaner. Fluttershy joined us and we both helped clean her up. "I will be so happy when this is done," Rarity said, sitting in the sphinx position as fish danced to a tune sung by Fluttershy.
"Me too," I said, brushing her coat. This takes FOREVER. An advantage to not having body hair all over... well, not so much you have to brush it. I'm not as hairy as I was when I was 'Erik' but I have a fair amount.
"And I," Fluttershy said softly. "But it's nice to be with friends."
"It is," I said, looking up at the stars. I pointed to one combination of stars. "There's the Sail," I said. "It's the symbol of adventurers like us, because it's connected to Sinbad." Who is the Immortal of sailors and adventurers.
"In Karameikos, it's known as the Northern Triad," Twilight said, and we all started. She was lurking behind us, looking up at the stars. "Representing Halav, Petra, and Zirchev." The three patron Immortals of Karameikos. When hordes of gnolls invaded two thousand years ago, they stopped the invasion and eventually went on to become immortals. Halav was a mighty warrior, Petra was a wise priestess, and Zirchev was a cunning hunter and wizard, friend to the fae folk of the forest. "The Ethengars see it as the Sacred Yurt, symbol of Cretia the Trickster, Tubak the Lawgiver, and Yamurga the Tentkeeper. The Northmen see it as the Shield, which represents Frey, Freya, and Thor."
"Not Odin?" I asked, surprised.
"Odin is a remote figure to be placated more than loved," Twilight said. "In the Northlands. Or so my books say. I've never been there, but Erik would talk about it, so I read up on it."
Twitch. Of course you did.
"It also can symbolize Vestland, Ostland, and the Soderfjord Jarldoms," Twilight said. "Or sometimes it stands for Freya, Sif, and Frigga."
"My goodness, it must be very busy," Rarity said. I think this was a joke, so I laughed and she smiled and I relaxed; if she'd been serious... well, Pinkie would probably say it represents pie, cake, and cupcakes or something.
"Maybe it stands for Sleipnir, Celestia, and Luna," Fluttershy said softly.
"I must admit I hadn't heard of Princess Luna before I met you," I said.
"She's... been on a trip," Fluttershy said weakly, scuffing the dirt with her hooves.
"Come to steal Marcus before he finishes?" Rarity said softly to Twilight.
"I hate to interrupt," Twilight said, sounding guilty. "We should practice some magic, though."
"I'll brush you," Fluttershy said.
"You are a lifesaver and a true friend," Rarity said. "I will brush you when you're done."
"Thank you," Fluttershy said.
"You two have fun," Rarity said to me.
I'll have fun; I'll just be wondering if I am going to die the whole time.
************
I ended up on first watch with Twilight, Spike, and Rainbow Dash. Spike went to sleep immediately after saying, "Don't worry, I can stay up if I want to."
Twilight put him on a blanket and the two of us practiced spells together, while Rainbow Dash bobbed about, keeping watch.
"This could really get ugly, you know," I said to her.
"I know," Twilight said, sighing. "But with no map and no idea what's inside, we can't even plan. All I can do is be ready and work on improving how many spells I know." She sounded frustrated.
We were both juggling lightning balls, trying to work on control. Well, control for Twilight, power for me. She has huge raw power but lacks control. I am the opposite way around. I think Rarity is the same way. As me, that is. VERY high control, more so than me.
Spike now coughed up a letter in his sleep. This reminded me. "Have we in fact told Celestia what's going on?"
"Oh no, I totally forgot, she's going to be so unhappy and... Spike's asleep!," Twilight said.
"Just write it now. We probably won't die overnight," I told her." I curiously examined the letter, which was from Princess Luna to me. I blinked. Well, time to read, I guess.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Samus Marcus,
My dear sister Celly tells me that you are a dear friend of hers, though I must confess I don't remember her ever mentioning you. She said, however, that I should write you and warn you that the notorious criminal Erik of Vestland is believed to be in the northern Malpheggi swamp and that Thyatian and Minrothadi hit squads are in the area, trying to find him and capture or kill him. So keep your eyes open. He is wanted for the theft of the Water Elves' Pearl, an affair with a Minrothadi ambassador, wearing an Augrist high priest's hat when unqualified to do so, stealing the harem of a Thyatian Ambassador, mocking the Thyatian Emperor, wearing the Sacred Hat of Valerias inappropriately, misleading youth, mocking the gods, failing to pay for 8 sandwiches, and 3 moving violations. Among other crimes.
Also, apparently, he broke Twilight's heart and for that, he will suffer tremendously. The heart of a young filly is NOT to be trifled with!
NOT to be trifled with.
Sorry, I normally don't get so angry with people, but Twilight and her friends are important to me, and I don't like to see someone I care about get hurt.
It makes me angry.
You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
I don't like me when I'm angry.
Sorry, I got off topic. You must make sure everyone in the group knows about this. I'm not sure why Celly didn't have me also alert Twilight, but I trust her judgment
I suppose she fears Twilight will do something foalish.
Hehe.
Anyway, also tell everyone the Glantrians are here and things are going well, though I think several of them will have to be taught to stop looking covetously at everyone's horns.
Please inform us as soon as you reach the dragon; we haven't heard anything for several days and we're worried.
Anyway, a pleasure to meet you,
Your new friend,
Princess Luna of Equestria, sister to Princess Celestia.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Twilight was reading over my shoulder; I was sitting on the ground. "He's NOT A CRIMINAL," she said fervently.
TWITCH.
I'd like you to know, I would have paid for those sandwiches, except someone tried to kill me and I had to run for my life!
I hope those hit squads can't just zoom in on me; the last thing this mission needs is interruption by people trying to kill me.
Of course they will. Though...
AHAHAHAHA. If I can manipulate them into thinking the fake me is 'Erik'... oh hoh hoh.
They might make off with some of the dragon's treasure, though. Dammit.
"I'm still surprised you don't hate him," I said nervously to her. Flames were licking along her tail, which can't be a good sign.
She closed her eyes and counted to ten. The fire went out. "I understand why he ran away. I'm sure if I hadn't been too drunk to chase him, it would have been okay." She sighed. "There were times, I thought... It's just, when we were studying or working on things, even when we just were doing our own projects near each other, it was like when I watched my parents when I was a filly. That simple comfort from just being around someone you care about, even if you're both busy, it just..." She sighed. "I guess it sounds crazy."
I would kill myself but probably I would spontaneously rise from the dead because they don't want me in the afterlife. I should probably try; it would be easier than waiting for the truth to out. "No, I understand," I told her. "It looks like Celestia and Luna plan to kill him for hurting you, though."
"I'm sure they'll understand once I explain it to them. I can put it in the next letter," Twilight said. She sighed. "He probably has someone else by now, and I shouldn't keep thinking about him."
"You're better off moving on," I told her. "I doubt we'll encounter him." LIE LIE LIE.
She sighed. "I have to focus on important things," she said, then shook her head. "Let's focus on blowing things up. I'm going to have to face evil-me, so I need a counter-spell."
"Water," I said. "You need a water attack to turn her lightning back on her."
"Oooh, yes," Twilight said.
In three minutes, she found a water generating spell and started practicing it, while I stood in for evil Twilight, using an illusion of lightning so I wouldn't hurt myself for real. It was very cheesy looking; I can only do simple illusions.
We kept working on tactics, until, finally, it was time to get some sleep, for which I was grateful.
******************
I woke up in a nice soft bed, which was confusing to say the least. It had dark blue sheets with white stars on it, a Winter Solstice present from Twilight; the stars were, in fact, accurately placed, though many stars were missing; this was only the most prominent ones.
I got as far as taking a shower, making breakfast and starting to eat it when I suddenly realized I was somehow back in my old quarters at Celestia's School, which were apparently totally unchanged after more than a year, and wearing clothing I'd abandoned when I fled.
Nervously, I went back to the bathroom and this time paid actual attention to my body. Looking in the mirror, I saw Erik's face looking at me. I was taller, paler, more muscular, definitely blonder with longer hair.
I have to admit, I regret losing this body's good looks. 'Samus Marcus' isn't hideously ugly, but I'm not beauty contest winner either.
However, I can see why Ivan arranged for me to be shapeshifted; with so many lunatics after me, what else could I do?
"So long as you run without a patron, you'll always be hunted and it will only grow worse over time," a woman said to me. She was deep voiced but very smooth.
And I couldn't see her anywhere.
"Okay, voice in my head, who are you?" I said.
There was a gentle laughter, but something about it disturbed me.
And then it was gone.
I must be dreaming, I decided. It would make NO sense for me to be back in Canterlot and Erik otherwise.
Might as well see what happens if it's a dream. I checked the calendar. I should be teaching classes today; in fact, I'd better run.
Class went smoothly despite me only recognizing half the ponies present. Oddly, one of them looked somewhat like Applejack, except for the red mane and, well, the horn, and one of them... was she an Alicorn? She had an orange coat and purple mane and had a horn AND wings.
They and their friend, a white unicorn with a pink and purple mane were all VERY hyper and hard to keep in line. Also, the redhead kept touching her horn every few minutes for some reason.
The rest of my classes went well, I handed back homework and took more homework to grade and headed home. I could see Twilight's tower distantly; Spike was busy cleaning the windows.
I sighed, feeling that familiar clutch of guilt. After what I did to her, I can't, even in a dream. She deserves better. I enjoy her company. I like her. If she'd been human...
But I can't rewrite the past, even in a dream.
Okay, I could in a dream, but it doesn't feel right.
I don't have the right to go dream about happy times with Twilight as if I never messed anything up for her.
"She would forgive you, you know," the voice said. "She understands you better now."
I need... I don't want us to be enemies or hostile, but I don't... It wouldn't be healthy for her to just forgive me everything.
I'd be taking advantage of her good nature.
I remembered my fight with Rarity. She got mad at me; I didn't mean to make her feel that way but weirdly, it felt... I don't want to fight with people, but having an honest fight and then making up, that felt right. Overly easy forgiveness cheapens forgiveness.
But I guess that reflects me not thinking like a Pony.
She ought to get angry with me before we make up.
Much as that likely means turning me into a turnip.
"You really have learned nothing about the dangers of displeasing those of vast power," the woman said softly. "Do you intend to drag them down in the wreck of your ship? If you really thought what you just thought, you'd tell her the truth."
I'm too scared to. As usual, I'm following the path of least resistance. What keeps me alive five more minutes.
"Serve me and you won't have to be afraid. You will have whatever woman you want, and wealth and power too. I could make you the great wizard you've always dreamed of. Or you can keep on running, like a rat in a maze. Is that what you want?" the woman asked with her deep, smooth voice. Was this Luna? No, I don't think so. Nyx? No, she'd want me to be undead.
"I don't serve anyone," I said. "I have friends and I work with them, because we're friends, but I am no one's servant." Okay, I do work for hire a lot but this is clearly a 'swear to the glorious night or whatever and get power, wealth, etc' situation. NEVER swear to mysterious voices.
"Friends you lie to," she said. "Is there anyone in this group you've been honest with? You're just using them for your own benefit. I'll use you, but I'll pay you to do it. And protect you from your enemies. You have too many enemies to survive without a patron."
That's probably true. But I'm certainly not selling myself to a mysterious voice. "Why me?" I asked.
"You made your choices, not me," she said, amused.
"No, I mean, why do YOU want me," I asked.
"I need someone sneaky who has no one else to turn to. No one else to rely on."
The setting had shifted and now I was in the swamp. I could see the assassins creeping towards our camp and I was 'Samus Marcus' again. "Do you really think a bunch of ponies can stop the Thyatians? The Minrothadi?" she asked me.
Could they? The Minrothadi don't mess around and neither do the Thyatians. On the other hand, this group is a lot tougher than it looks.
They shouldn't have to. But I can't leave them now. I want to run. But I can't leave an evil clone of myself running around loose, getting me into even MORE trouble.
And leaving reduces my odds of surviving those hit squads, assuming they can find and recognize me. Which I have to assume the worst.
But if I stay, the truth will eventually out and I will be KILLED.
Can't run. Can't not run.
Dammit!
I hate this.
"I put my trust in them," I said. "They're tougher than you think."
Her voice turned harsh. "Then you are a fool and with them, you will DIE."
The air turned solid and I couldn't breathe. Literally.
I began choking; I couldn't even fall down because the solid air froze me in place.
"This time, you will stay dead," the woman said harshly. "You are a failure, discarded by your master as a failed experiment and now that experiment ends."
What the hell is she talking about?
Mind you, I now suddenly remembered meeting this dragon before. She had been named... Marquetta? She had a Belcadizian name? Maybe this is a shapeshifted Belcadizian? But I don't remember any Dona Marquettas.
But I do remember going into this dragon's lair for some reason and then Annika began casting a spell and the dragon spat fire at her and I shoved her out of the way and...
Something about being killed by an owlbear while carrying the dragon's treasure.
I survived dragonfire, then got killed by an owlbear???
Also, I was alone when I got killed by the owlbear, so how did I not stay dead?
Dammit, I need to find someone to catalog and sort my brain.
At least I am going to die with a hat on, so my corpse will have some dignity.
And better I be killed by someone I hate than someone I like.
I could feel myself getting weak from lack of air.
I'm going to regret this, because the last... of course, she already knows where I am.
CELESTIA! HELP!!!!! I'll do anything! Don't let me get eaten!!!!
There was a crackle of lightning behind me and a whirring noise and then to my utter shock, Pinkie went shooting past me at high speed and crashed into Marquetta's nose. She looked utterly stunned, especially when another Pinkie crashed into her cheek. And another one into her right shoulder.
What the hell?
She rose up and breathed fire, but her own spell around me deflected the fire. Further, the solidity of the air melted and though now I felt steamed, I could breathe.
I turned and saw Pinkie with a giant metal tube over one shoulder. Lightning crackled inside it as it rotated and as I watched, another Pinkie formed inside it and was fired at Marquetta at high speed.
WHAT THE HELL?
Nothing I have ever seen blew my mind more than this.
A veritable army of Pinkies was all over Marquetta, hitting her with pies, trying to sell her insurance, pulling back scales and trying to stick her head behind them, singing songs and dancing, kicking her, biting her, reciting poetry and staging stand up comedy routines.
When the hell did Pinkie get the ability to do THIS?
I started laughing. How could I not?
That really made Marquetta angry.
She gave a tremendous shriek and spread her wings, sending Pinkies flying everywhere. "I WILL NOT BE MOCKED!"
"Those who cannot take a joke will have to have one given to them," Pinkie said very seriously. "That's what Uncle Korotiku always says."
UNCLE Korotiku???
He's one of the high ranking Immortals of Thought. Basically a spider who turns into a man (or maybe vice versa), a trickster Immortal. Worshiped more on Skothar than here on Brun, though the Pearl Islanders worship him.
Surely he's not actually Pinkie's uncle.
Though it would explain a few things.
All of the Pinkies now imitated Marquetta's stance as best they could. "I WILL NOT BE MOCKED!" they shouted, then giggled and ran as she tried to fry them with fire.
"Thanks, Pinkie," I said. "Am I asleep?"
"Of course you are, silly. I couldn't do this if we were awake," she said as the chaos continued nearby. "She tried tempting me but I already have plenty of pie." She produced one from her saddlebags. "Pie?"
"Yes, it is," I said to her.
She blinked, then laughed. "Anyway, we need to all wake up to kick her out of our dreams."
The last thing I need is another player in this mess.
"How about a thin mint!," one of the Pinkies shouted as I woke up.
*************
Everyone, apparently, had dreamed of her trying to subvert them, which creeped us all out.
"Marquetta was a ~red dragon~ who laired in the Malpheggi for about fifteen years," Spike said. He said 'red dragon' the way one might normally refer to dung or urine or some other very nasty thing. Multiplied by about five. "She relocated for some reason about forty years ago from the Cruth Mountains to the Malpheggi; she beat up the other dragons and asserted her dominance but they resented her. Twenty five years or so ago, the Blue Eagle Company raided her lair and stole a bunch of her treasure. She hunted them down, killed them all, then vanished. Her fate is unknown but most people assume she relocated to some more remote location with less treasure thieves."
I would think I was in the Blue Eagle Company except that would make me a LOT older than I think I am. I'm pretty sure I am somewhere in my early thirties.
"My uncle Pieter worked for one of the Blue Eagles when he was young," Ivan said. "During his Shearing. He went back home before they all got killed off, though. The way he told it, the Dragon ate all of them but one who got away somehow. They were all Karameikan."
"Who was the one who got away?" I asked.
"Dmitri Ilyanovich," Ivan said. "He was from Kelvin and had to leave when Baron Kelvin took it over and renamed it from... whatever it was before. Because of the ban on magic users."
Baron Kelvin is a cleric of the Church of Karameikos and for some reason has a really inane law against arcane magic in his barony.
Ivan is from Novgorod, a little village about halfway between Kelvin and Penhaligon, about twenty five or so miles from each. Kelvin, with its mighty five thousand people, is 'the big city' to anyone from Novgorod, which has about eight hundred. Even though Kelvin only has about a city block worth of people in a real metropolis like Thyatis City.
Dmitri... dammit, that name sounds familiar and makes me think of death by owlbear.
I can't possibly be that old unless someone is feeding me longevity potions, though. When I'm not looking.
"How did you know to help me, Pinkie?" I asked.
"I got this weird twitch in my leg so I just started wandering around until I found you," she said.
So she just wanders through people's dreams because of leg twitches. ACK.
"The weird thing is that the other dragon didn't give me that twitch, so I guess this one means 'red dragon', though that other red dragon, I got a *different* twitch."
Twilight now twitched visibly. "We'll worry about that later."
"Maybe it is pretending to be Marquetta to confuse us," Applejack said. "Just 'cause a dragon claims one name doesn't mean it's true. It might actually be a blue or a green or something, in disguise."
"Given reds don't normally invade dreams..." Why did it call me an experiment discarded by my master? I felt all weird in my own body now.
"Ahah!" Twilight said, then did the hoof of triumph. "I found her! Marquetta has a FIVE PAGE entry in Jagger's Catalog of Dragons, Volume four!"
Oh man, I didn't even think about how Twilight had brought her dragon books.
"It says that after she ate a group of adventurers who tried to steal her treasure and got their artifact, she moved to the Malpheggi and took over White Plume Mountain as her lair."
We all paused and looked at the mountain and I twitched.
What's worse than a Grand Wyrm Black Dragon?
A GRAND WYRM RED DRAGON!!!
Damn you White Plume Mountain
"That was 959 AC. In 975 AC, the Blue Eagle Company raided her lair, forced her to flee, and stole her treasure. She survived, then picked them off one by one but the party's scout, Dmitri Ilyanovich, managed to hide from her. He hasn't been seen since and neither has she; her hoard vanished and it's assumed she's still trying to hunt him down."
"What was the artifact?" Rarity asked curiously.
I knew in my gut it would be the Lockpicks of Asterius and Marquetta and Vermicoritax would somehow be the same dragon and we all would DIE.
"The Falchion of Minroth," Twilight said.
"The what?" Applejack asked.
"I... don't know," Twilight said, then turned red.
"I think it's some kind of bird," Pinkie said.
"That's a falcon, and a falchion is not a bird," Fluttershy said.
"Well, it doesn't matter, then," Ivan said. "Though if we find something weird, we should check it out."
"Maybe Marquetta made the clones in order to trigger a war between Equestria and the dragons of the Malpheggi, so she could reassert her rule over the area in the aftermath," I said.
"And hired the thugs to maybe slow us down long enough for the dopplegangers to do their work and start the war since we would try to be peaceful?" Spitfire said, frowning.
"You know, it's possible that Herr Ukvarth was a shapeshifted Marquetta, infiltrating to urge us to trigger this war," I said, frowning.
Everyone grimaced at that.
"You mentioned a red dragon killed your parents, Spike? Any connection to Marquetta?" I said, frowning.
"Probably not; it happened up by North Marech Castle. A red tried to settle in after leaving the Adri Varna Plateau," Spike said sadly. "Celestia had to take the field herself in the end."
Twilight patted him comfortingly as he leaned on her. "I will send Owlicious a letter; he can look up what a 'falchion' is."
Spike quickly took dictation and burned the letter.
A thought hit me. "Keraptis used to steal weapons, right? And put them in the mountain to draw people to their doom?"
"So probably the Falchion was some weapon that Keraptis stole and then Marquetta added it to her hoard? Hell, Keraptis may have recruited Marquetta to come live here while he took a vacation and once he came back, she had to move out or something," Ivan said thoughtfully.
"Well, I think it's time for us to go in," Applejack said. "Ain't much we can do to get ready we ain't already done."
Unfortunately.
Time for victory or death, and I hope not death. Though I suppose Fluttershy can probably reincarnate us if we die.
With my luck, I'll end up a goldfish.
*************
Here's the problem. We climbed up the mountainside to the only entrance big enough for ponies, kindly labeled by our enemies. Now the problem is that we can be SURE it's a trap. The tunnel was hot and humid with a narrow crack at the far end; every few minutes, a gout of steam erupted, trying to roast everyone in the rough wedge-shaped tunnel. Ivan and I took the lead because we know how to find and eliminate traps. Fortunately, Ivan's keen hearing detected the oncoming steam buildup and so we hit the floor and avoided boiling.
We had to dodge it three times before we found the cunningly hidden trap door which opened onto a staircase, down into a long twenty foot wide tunnel. Everyone ran in and down the stairs and we headed up the tunnel, lined with cut, dressed granite with no decoration.
Hornglow and mage light lit our way. Applejack, Dash, Ivan, and myself took the lead, two ready to fight, two searching for the inevitable DEATH TRAPS.
Death Trap number one involved a marble ceiling panel, carved with runes and a trap door under it. Ivan triggered the trap and we looked down. Matching marble flooring sixty feet down. You fall, WHAM, then you teleport to the top and fall again WHAM. AGAIN. AGAIN. And so on.
Simple, elegant, stolen from second century Thyatian tomb designs, which they likely stole from the Nithians. If you've ever died in a horrible trap, the odds are good the Nithians or Blackmoor invented it first.
This one, though, was clearly a warning; the marble ceiling panel made it OBVIOUS.
The second one was a classic dart trap. If you don't follow the correct zig-zag pattern on the floor, which was marked with black and white titles, you got shot with darts. Again, the sudden decor switch said 'Hey kids, TRAP!'
Ivan and I carefully chalked the tiles they needed to step on. "Don't step on any other tiles," I said. "But honestly, this is easy."
"Hah!" Rainbow Dash flew to the other side. "Even EASIER!"
"Uhh, sugarcube, it ain't so easy as you say," Applejack said.
I demonstrated. "See, it's really not that hard if you go slow."
"You're forgetting a fundamental difference 'tween us, Marcus," Applejack said.
"Being a woman doesn't matter," I said.
Ivan punched me. "She has four legs."
I buried my face in my hands. "Okay, I feel stupid," I said.
"We could put boards across it," Pinkie said.
"If we had boards," Spike pointed out.
"We'll just fly everyone," Spitfire said.
Twilight teleported herself and Spike across. "That's one less pony to haul."
"I bet you could jump it," Dash said to Applejack.
Fluttershy flew herself across. Applejack backed up, nearly fell in the pit trap, then made a running jump and crossed it, looking proud of herself. "Yeehaw!" She reared triumphantly.
Pinkie now produced weird looking shoes and put them on and walked on the wall. "Spider-Pinkie, Spider-Pinkie," she sang. "Does whatever a spider can!"
Then she tossed them to Rarity; the shoes were red with black webbing and looked rather silly. Rarity licked her lips nervously, then walked on the wall quickly, now looking a little tired. "It's hard to fight off gravity," she said.
I helped her take them off and Pinkie put them back on, though now she made a really annoying popping sound every time she moved.
I was a little jealous, though the shoes were made for ponies, not humans and thus had no space for feet. They were like tubes, basically.
The third trap was more subtle. Classic mashing-wall trap. No tells, no obvious signs of trouble. You had to find a switch to shut it off, very subtly hidden. Fortunately, Ivan knows his stuff.
Then we reached an intersection. Tunnels ran left and right at angles and straight forwards. There was a semi-circular room here and in it squatted a disheveled, unhappy sphinx. Rarity made a cry of horror, then rushed up to her as she squatted on a pile of furs. "Oh, you poor darling. Let me guess, you have to guard this place and can't leave at all to visit a nice spa, right?"
The Sphinx blinked, ruffling her feathers. "I... oh yes. It's terrible! It's nothing but dirty adven... wait, didn't you already come through here?"
"Those were our evil twins," I said. "I take it you're a longer-term resident?"
"I was bound here for a century by Keraptis, and I have fifty-three years to go," she said mournfully. "I thought I got a good deal when the terms were until this flower bloomed again," she said, pointing to a potted plant which had a barren trunk and barren branches. "Only, it's a CENTURY plant."
This is why you NEVER bargain with mad wizards. "Did he keep his end of the deal?"
"Oh yes, he found my missing child. Who now has GRANDCHILDREN I HAVE NEVER SEEN," she said angrily. "Does Democritus ever visit? NO, he's too busy running around like a tramp."
Twenty minutes of bitching about her ungrateful children ensued. Rarity and Fluttershy made sympathetic noises, while the rest of us slowly went mad.
"I assume we have to answer a riddle to pass?" Twilight said hopefully.
"Oh yes. One for each tunnel. Fail and I have to devour you, which will only make me more of a filthy mess," the sphinx said mournfully.
I am very, very dubious this sphinx can actually eat us.
"Here, let us clean you up some," Rarity said. "I cannot allow a lady and a mother to remain in this condition. It would be dishonorable."
This is how I ended up assisting in giving a sphinx a makeover. We worked hard on grooming her, while Twilight did the riddle thing.
"Okay, left tunnel riddle," Twilight said.
"I have a mouth but never speak. I have a bed but never sleep. I run smoother than any rhyme. I love to fall but cannot climb," the sphinx said, sounding bored of even saying it.
"River," Twilight said.
The sphinx blinked. "Okay, you got that one but the next one is harder. Round she is, yet flat as a board, Altar of the Lupine Lords..." She didn't actually get to finish before Twilight spoke.
"The Moon," Twilight said.
"I didn't even finish it!," the sphinx said, clearly disappointed.
"Also, the phrase 'Altar of the Lupine Lords' comes right out of Mother Wyvern's Book of Poetry for Children, Volume Three," Twilight said.
"..."
"Third riddle?" she asked eagerly.
As I brushed fluff and dirt off one of her wings and Fluttershy followed up with a soapy brush, the sphinx licked her lips. "The other version of you had a hard time with this one."
"Evil is always weaker than good," Twilight said confidently.
If that was true, then evil wouldn't cause so much trouble. She's still kind of naive at heart. I've seen too much evil to expect good will always win. So I licked my lips nervously.
Pinkie climbed up with a broom in her mouth, and began twisting around unnaturally to dust off the sphinx's head. "My creator wants me not, And much in dread will I be bought. My cold embrace is fiercely fought, Most all who need me know it not."
This has to be some kind of death thing.
Pinkie looked down at me thoughtfully.
I am not the answer to this riddle. I hope.
How much did she hear?
Twilight rubbed her forehead. "Okay, hard one. Time limit?"
"Take your time; you can go north and northwest now since you answered the riddles for those, then come back and tell me," she said.
"What is your name?" Pinkie asked.
"Etrusca," the sphinx said.
"Okay, Etrusca," Pinkie said and finished sweeping.
Twilight was STILL trying to figure it out when we finished cleaning up Etrusca, who was now a nice golden-brown and gleamed. She cried with joy when Rarity showed her herself in the mirror. "Oh, it's wonderful," she said. "If only my boy would come visit."
"I can mail him a letter if you like," Spike said.
"PLEASE," she said, so she wrote out a letter and Spike sent it.
Then we headed northwest.
************
The hallway descended and now had a foot of murky water covering the floor. Rarity stared at it in horror. The Wonderbolts and Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy simply flew over it. Twilight grimaced too, while Applejack just splashed out into it.
"Sorry, Rarity, but we have to press on," I told her.
She sighed. "The things a lady must do." She shook her head and waded into the water. We were used to this by now, though Applejack looked rather amused.
There was a hidden pit trap, though I am not sure how effective it really would be given you'd gently float down a bit instead of plummeting. But we shut that down easily.
The hallway now bent north and had six ten foot long copper plates on each wall before opening up into a bigger room ahead. Ivan and I held up a hand. "What the hell is this?" Ivan said. "Is it magic?"
I studied it. "Yes."
"Is it a giant still?" Pinkie asked.
"There's probably a floor trigger," Ivan said. "But this murky water hides the floor so I can't look for it."
"I could scout past it," Rainbow Dash said.
"That could cut you off," Ivan said, frowning.
"We could try sucking up all the water into clouds, but there's not really room to disperse it and I think we'd end up shrouded in fog, never mind," Soarin' said. He sighed.
Twilight studied the wall panels. "They cause heat, I think."
"It IS a still," Pinkie said excitedly.
I do not wish to become brandy.
"Maybe the riddle for this tunnel has some kind of clue," Twilight said thoughtfully.
"We are standing in a kind of stagnant river, which was the answer," Spike said.
"The middle one, the moon, could also mean 'air'," Ivan said. "It may have air defenses, and then the last one is either fire or earth related."
"Hey, it could be earth and then this one has magic challenges for unicorns," Applejack said. "So unicorns go this way, pegasi the middle way, earth ponies the other one."
"I would hope unicorns are NOT expected to wade in filthy water," Rarity said, frowning.
"And someone trying to fend you off would make the route as filthy as possible," I told her. "Or fend me off. Remember, mad wizards want to see you flail, but always provide some sort of out if you are clever or determined enough. It's how they get their jollies."
Twilight thought hard. "Wouldn't it be easier to beat the challenges if you have another kind of pony's abilities?"
"Maybe," Ivan said. "We can expect a couple of things this way that only magic can beat, if the theory is correct. Given this place wasn't made just for pony-thwarting, there may be other thematic things going on. Mad wizards LOVE their themes."
"These traps are usually triggered by pressure, right?" Applejack said.
"Yes," Ivan said. "Unless they have magic sensors built in."
"I'm thinking Rainbow Dash should try to move through, see if she can get by," Applejack said.
"Hold on," I said and cast Saint Tarastia's fire on her. "Now she can see once she gets there."
Rainbow Dash said, "FORWARDS!"
She zoomed down the corridor, then said, "There's a big square room with a watery floor, but stairs go up out of the water!" Then she winced. "And my hooves hurt. My horseshoes feel hot."
A second later. "And...uh... really ugly, dirty humans are coming at me! Time to kick some ass!"
The Wonderbolts launched down the hallway to aid her, though both of them gave a yelp at the end.
"Forward," Applejack shouted.
"No, wait, it may not be..." I began.
Applejack and Pinkie rushed down the hallway; by the end, they were yelping about hot horseshoes too.
Rarity said, "Try and lure them to where I can shoot them from here."
"And the same for me!" Twilight shouted.
"I think maybe it's heating up metal like Fluttershy's spell. Fluttershy, do you think maybe you could turn this off?"
"I can try," Fluttershy said and she began singing a song, while Spike helped Rarity stow all her jewelry in her saddlebags. Ivan and I stowed our weapons in Twilight's saddlebags so she could pass them back to us.
Fluttershy began to glow. "Stand close by me," she said and she led us down the hallway, protecting us. We reached the far end, a large square room; there was a concealed door open in one wall and nine ill-kempt humans with sallow skin and dirty fangs and clawed fingers were rampaging. Three more had collapsed in the water, dead or unconscious. They were starting to crumble into dust. Applejack and Pinkie were both paralyzed and fallen down in the water. Dash was busy dodging them and looking frustrated. Spitfire and Soarin' kicked another one into the wall and then fell on him, battering him until he collapsed; their suits seemed to let them touch the creatures safely.
The first wave fell back when Twilight and I hammered them with lightning balls. Rarity shot three of them with arrows, piercing their hearts and they fell, crumbling to dust. Spike breathed fire on them; to my surprise, they didn't vanish but they DID burn, and two of them now stumbled away and threw themselves in the water, though they were now badly hurt. Twilight then passed Ivan and I our weapons.
Fluttershy said something I couldn't hear over all the shouting, then began flapping her wings like it was some sort of signal.
Dash flew over to us. "If you touch them or they claw you, you get paralyzed. I need a magic protection whammy."
Fluttershy laid her hooves on Dash and sang; Dash now glowed green as well as having yellow and red St. Tarastia's Fire. "This should protect you."
The Wonderbolts nailed another ghoul and beat him down, working together, even as Dash rushed into the fray and pushed another one through the concealed door and back into the room they came from. I heard a 'WHAM'.
Ivan darted at one, stabbed him, parried the counter-stroke with a dagger, stabbed him again, parried another blow and then finished him off.
Applejack made a muffled noise probably indicating her irritation with being paralyzed. Pinkie made gurgly noises and Ivan turned her head to get the water out.
Fluttershy now came over to Applejack and began praying and singing and laying on of hooves. Applejack suddenly snapped into action. "Hold on while I protect you," Fluttershy said, while Applejack waited impatiently.
By the time she was ready, the rest of us had blasted, burned, stabbed, and beaten our foes to death.
"Well, that was a fight," Twilight said.
"Warmup act," I said.
"..."
"Likely all these paths we'll get keys or something to reach the sanctum where our doubles will be waiting, rested up while we are battered and worn down."
Ivan began rooting through the dust piles. He didn't find much, but there was a chest in the secret room. Careful examination showed that it was linked to a trap to close the door and flood the room, so the Wonderbolts, Dash, and Applejack positioned themselves to hold the door open while Ivan disabled the trap with help from me. Several hundred each of silver, gold, and electrum coins, but the really valuable thing was a silver statuette of Nyx. It was beautifully made with tiny gemstone eyes and she held a little crystal goblet of 'blood' (actually ruby, according to Rarity). It went into Rarity's bags.
Rule 2 of dungeons, always look for hidden treasure. I checked for a false bottom but there wasn't one. Tsk, someone is slipping.
Time to go up the stairs and die.
**************
The stairs bent around up to a rather unusual room. It was very tall, maybe 120 or more feet tall in height; about five feet above ground level, a waterway flowed through the air, about ten feet deep with ten foot high above water level openings in the walls that it flowed in and out of. There were three more similar rivers above it. I suspect it's all one big river which flows up and down using magic and bent space. Eight rectangular rafts sat against the wall, each about five feet long and two feet wide; you could see the flow of the current and fish swam in the water. Probably they eat flesh.
I threw a small wad of paper; it didn't dissolve, so not acid.
"I guess we just raft to the end," Applejack said.
"It's going to be trickier than that," I said. "Soarin', try flying straight down the tunnel until you see us again. If you have to make a choice, go left."
He flew into the north wall and after three minutes, emerged from the west wall at the top level. "I passed through four other rooms but I stuck with my stream. There was a triangle shaped room, a pentagon, a hexagon, and...uh... a room with seven sides," he shouted down.
This room was a square. Bloody hell, this is some damn math-geometry puzzle bullshit.
"Simple progression of sides," Twilight said. "Spike, notes."
Spike began taking notes as Soarin' reported what he'd seen; he'd gone through the pentagon, then the triangle, then the septagon, then the hexagon. Each room had as many streams flowing through it as the number of sides.
"It's entirely possible this changes alignment based on something we're supposed to predict," I said.
"I hate this kind of thing," Ivan grumbled.
"I'm intrigued," Twilight said. "Rarity, take a look at this. This is supposed to be a challenge for unicorns, we think, so we should work together."
"If I was going to challenge me, it would involve making clothing," Rarity said, but she came over and began studying Twilight's notes. They began sending our pegasi through the tunnels, trying to map out more of it and find the pattern. I frowned. There has to be more to this than just a really complicated water maze.
We were all a little surprised when Rainbow Dash suddenly came flying back out of one of the tunnels at ground level. It looked like there was also an octagon, a nonagon AND a decagon, and then you ended up back here. Further, only about a third of the identified water roads were the one which ran at the ground floor here. In other words, you'd have to switch levels at least once in order to get through this, and I suspect, a bunch of times.
WE ARE GOING TO BE IN HERE FOREVER.
"How is anypony supposed to jump these rafts from one level to another?" Applejack said. "For that matter, without oars, how do we steer?"
"Teleport," I said. "Hmm, let me test something, much as I'd rather stay dry."
I leaped up into the water and stood in it; you could feel a kind of membrane, and though it swayed a bit under my weight, it held me up. "Depending on how far the distance is, we could throw rafts up to someone or down, then climb up and down with ropes or using those crazy jumping skills of yours," I said. "Probably something will try to kill us while we're in the middle of it."
"So it's intended to make us use lots of magic and get too worn out when we reach the next danger?" Rarity said.
"Most likely, yes," I said. "There may be re-directs and the like intended to split us up which the pegasi aren't triggering because they're not in the water."
"These rafts are so ugly," Rarity said, frowning. "I bet our evil twins cheated with their flying carpet."
That made sense. "Maybe there's some way to exploit your arrows."
"Maybe the fact we start in the square is some kind of hint," Pinkie mused. "Instead of the triangle; it's the logical starting point, right?"
"Yes," Twilight said. She studied our crude map, looking for a numerical pattern. "Three through ten. Eight rooms. Maybe they stand for something," Twilight mused.
"They stand for me hating math puzzles," Ivan said, leaning on the wall.
Fluttershy paused, then blinked and went over and began talking to the fish.
I slapped my forehead. SO DAMN OBVIOUS.
"They say there's an eleven sided room which has frost giants in it and a twelve-sided room with a trapdoor in the ceiling over the topmost river," Fluttershy said. "But they're not smart enough to know the room orders."
"Some of the others may do things when a unicorn enters, if it's keyed to unicorns," I said.
"And if you come in low enough, the frost giants don't notice you because they rarely look at their feet, but you likely have to make complicated moves to REACH that low-running one in their room," Twilight said.
That made sense.
"I hate to ask but we have to map the rest of this and you three can get around easiest," Twilight said to the pegasi.
"It's cool, threading the needle here is pretty fun, see how fast you can do in confined space," Dash said.
Rarity twitched. Pinkie said, "Oooh, I don't know that one. What does your Rarity twitch tell you?"
"Marcus, darling, can you try getting under the water and pushing up on it?" Rarity said, studying the water intently. ...
I tried doing so and the water actually rose; you could grasp the 'membrane' and push it. If you were careful, with slow and steady pressure, you could push the water down too without breaking through the membrane and entering the water. It required, however, delicacy.
"This is a test for both of us," Rarity said. "Your keen mind for geometry and my mind for sewing. Your power and my finesse. This is like a badly sewn garment with threads going wildly everywhere. What we have to do is to pick apart the tangle and rethread it so it moves smoothly through the rooms in an orderly way, and then we can get past here."
Twilight rubbed her forehead. "That's going to drain us both a lot."
"We shall all have to pool our strength," Rarity said. "With you and I leading the way, I think we can do it."
It was a lot of work; the rest of us did a lot of climbing around, mapping, guiding, and sometimes just hefting rivers and pushing them around slowly at Rarity and Twilight's guidance, while they moved others themselves; Twilight summoned her Element and everyone was busy using theirs. Fluttershy even got the fish to help us.
You could actually feel the rooms move as Rarity and Twilight wove them into a new configuration; we could push the rooms around, which Applejack was very good at it. Pinkie assisted Applejack and made us lunch and dinner; it was dinner time by the time we'd rearranged them all and rafted to the biggest room, then climbed up through the trapdoor, but we all felt pretty proud of ourselves. Even better, the room at the top had three spindles of thread: cloth of gold, cloth of silver, and cloth of *platinum*. We were going to have some fancy formal attire, I could tell.
"Twilight," I told her. "There is almost certainly going to be an evil trapped book which will try to kill you and will be whatever book you MOST WANT. I tell you this, knowing you will blow yourself up anyway, but I have to try."
Twilight frowned. "I'm not stupid enough to fall for that trap," she said, glaring at me.
I speak from painful experience, of course.
"I hope the other routes don't have anything that complicated," Applejack said. "Though pushing rooms around was kind of fun."
"There's going to be an evil library. I know this in my heart," I said apologetically to Twilight. "And there will likely be something to make me do something foolish."
"Not hard," Spike said.
"Spike, be nice," Twilight said firmly. Fortunately, she doesn't stay mad for long.
"Also, Spike, don't eat any gems. They'll probably be poison or acid or something," I said.
"We should probably sleep soon," Pinkie said, yawning.
"Let's try and finish this branch, then we can hit the others tomorrow," Twilight said. "And we need to make sure none of our treasure so far is on the dragon's list."
We set off down a hallway as I tried to contemplate my weaknesses.
Which would take a while to go through *all* of them.
*************
The next room was large, maybe seventy feet long and forty feet wide with a door in the far wall; everything was painted with historical scenes. To the left of the entrance was the primitive semi-human Brute-men, hunting mammoths in the snow. To the right was a picture of us coming into the room. Various major events were painted across the walls and the far door. The door itself showed the crowning of the first Thyatian emperor; in the sky above him, Celestia and a black coated, armor wearing alicorn did battle as the moon eclipsed the sun. I had known about...
BING BING BING.
This must be Nightmare Moon. The fact that every pony in the place's breath caught made me realize I was right.
My brain whirred several clicks. This fight had caused an eclipse. We just had an eclipse around the same time they got the Elements of Harmony. Princess 'Luna' shows up after that. Holy shit, did they some how get one of the Entropics to switch sides?
I thought about how Entropy had once been Joy... and might be again, Twilight hoped.
Celestia aims big, I see.
I suddenly wondered if there had been an eclipse around 1000 BC when the gnolls laid waste to Karameikos and the Alphatians arrived on Mystara.
Twilight said something garbled, and I said to her, "Celestia dreams big."
"Yes," Twilight said softly.
Pinkie made incoherent noises with her hooves over her mouth.
"It's okay," I told her. "I can pretty much figure it out now."
"Figure what out?" Ivan asked.
"Don't worry about it," I told him. "I think we can assume this is some sort of 'push the right historical events to unlock the door' puzzle.
"Shouldn't we try the door before we just assume it's a trap?" Applejack said.
"It's ALWAYS a trap or a puzzle," I said. "Mad Wizards love this sort of thing."
"If there's even one block puzzle in this place, I am going to kill someone," Ivan said.
We all fanned out to study the murals, while Ivan and Twilight and I studied the door. It had no key lock but was locked. No obvious traps.
Then suddenly the door in filled with glowy light. And now we heard a voice. Twilight's voice. "Welcome to White Plume Mountain, evil twins of us."
"We are not EVIL," Applejack said. "And who are you ponies?"
"We are the Elements of Power," the not-Twilight said. "I am Dawn Gleaming, and I represent Knowledge. For Knowledge is a form of Power."
"Know..." Twilight stopped. Knowledge IS power. There is no way Twilight could possibly assert it is not. She looked utterly stymied.
"So is CANDY," Pinkie said. "Sugar is the ultimate power."
"Sugar doesn't even come close to Dawn Gleaming's power," a man said. He was somewhat higher pitched than me in tone but not actually into the high pitched registers (for a man).
"Sammy, is that you?" Pinkie asked.
"It's me, yes," Sammy said.
"I don't sound like that," I said.
"You sound exactly like that, sugarcube," Applejack said to me.
What? But I have a deeper voice than that, though not as deep as Erik had. When I was Erik, that is.
I heard distant laughter, which then stopped and now Rarity's voice echoed into the room. "Hello, everyone, I am Clarity, the Element of Industry."
"You are INCREDIBLY undignified," Rarity said condemningly.
"I just do what you do inside your head and I make it look good, don't I, Spikey?" Her voice purred.
"You always look good, Clarity," Spikey, the other-Spike said cheerfully.
Spike buried his face in his hands.
I guess Applejack is Farming, Dash is Athletics, Pinkie is... Partying? Social Affairs? And Fluttershy is something like Nature or Druidism or something.
"Anyway, my snuggle-wuggums and I designed this room for you," Dawn Gleaming began, her voice so laden with sugar, you could almost get a rush off it.
Pinkie, in fact, began bouncing about and shaking, probably having successfully gotten a rush off it.
"You have a snuggle-wuggums?" Twilight squeaked out.
"It's pretty much inevitable that two wizards working together will fall in love," Dawn Gleaming said with her voice full of even *more* sugar. "Touching minds, weaving spells together, sharing books, long evenings of studying together." Her voice kept getting ever more dreamy.
Rarity made a grumbly noise. Spike made a grumbling noise and looked at Rarity, then we could hear Clarity and Spikey making happy noises at each other. Spike looked ready to die and it hit me.
SPIKE HAS A CRUSH ON RARITY. I feel like an idiot for not seeing this before.
"Uhhh...," Applejack said. "So you two looking to make centaur babies?" She sounded boggled.
"Don't be silly, we use shapeshifting for such things. We're not looking for kids, anyway," Dawn Gleaming said. "We're both very busy and killing you all is eating up a lot of time we could be spending on finally finishing going over Edalsam's gloss of Meister Arkhe's commentary on Darius IV's history of Early Alphatia."
"I still think he made a huge mistake summarizing chapter 28 down to just three sentences. You can't just dismiss economic history that easily," Sammy said.
"Well, he had to get it down to 128 pages so it would fit in that printing size. Otherwise, he would have had to go up to 256, pushing the price too high, really, and making it harder to get through in the usual time alloted," Dawn Gleaming said.
"That isn't true, is it?" Rarity asked me, her voice oddly casual.
"I'm not familiar with the gloss in question, but the basic laws of printing apply," I said. "Alphatian presses would print giant pages which would be folded and cut into 128 pages. This made multiples of 128 the ideal size for books printed that way. Smaller presses could print 32 or 64 pages. So you wanted 32, 64, 128, or 256, usually. Beyond that, you probably wanted multiple volumes. Mind you, if we get into the issue of folios, then the math changes."
Dawn Gleaming and Sammy continued to debate history loudly, while Clarity and Spikey made happy noises at each other and our Spike clearly contemplated just burning EVERYTHING. Twilight, of course, began arguing the topic with Dawn Gleaming and Sammy.
Everyone else listened and milled around, waiting for someone who knew what to do.
"I meant about wizards, darling," Rarity said to me.
"Actually, wizards are more likely to set each other on fire over some stupid argument than to fall in love," I told her. "Though I have a friend in Glantri who became a wizard and married a wizard. And I suppose a lot of Glantrians and Alphatians do marry other wizards. But it's not what you'd consider automatic the way those two think."
"It IS inevitable," Dawn Gleaming said firmly to me. "We were *destined* by the stars!"
Twilight mumbled to herself.
Rarity started. "The mice," she said.
"Mice?" I asked.
"Long story," Rarity said.
"Twilight turned mice into horses to pull us to the Grand Gala, but Rarity's cat chased them off before we could go!" Pinkie said. "It was HILARIOUS." She began laughing.
"You shouldn't embarrass Rarity like that," I told Pinkie.
"If I don't, who will?" Pinkie said very seriously. "Everyone needs their chains rattled every so often."
Rarity looked at me, opened her mouth, glanced around, then shut it. "Enough of debating love and history," she said. "Let's get through this, I have things to do and places to go." Her voice was very businesslike. "What do we have to do?"
"Well, ideally, I would have just set you all on fire, but Keraptis liked to play with his food, so I have to give you a chance," Dawn Gleaming said regretfully. "I could be working with my snugglewuggums if you all would just die and leave us be. Or even just go away and never come back."
"We promised Vermicoritax to get ALL of his treasure back," Rainbow Dash said firmly. "I keep my promises."
"Me too," Applejack said and they high-hoofed. "Come on, let's get this done."
"There are ten historical errors in the paintings," Dawn Gleaming said. "Touch them all and the door opens. Each time you fail, a trap goes off."
"Is there a unique trap for each possible mistake?" Twilight asked.
"Do you think I could accept anything less?" Clarity asked. "A job worth doing is worth doing right, down to the smallest detail. That's how you get rich!"
"You robbed a dragon to get rich!" Rarity said angrily.
"Yes, and the robbery was carried out with an eye for detail. Wealth is the fruit of industry and it doesn't matter how you work as long as you work hard." Clarity sounded quite cheerful about this.
"And wealth is power," I said.
"Exactly, darling," Clarity said.
"I don't do it just for the money!" Rarity said angrily.
"We all know how you act when you see pretty things for the taking, dearie," Clarity said to her. "Men, jewelry, fine cloth... I saw how you coveted those rolls of cloth you found earlier. It pleased me, even if you have to die."
Rarity cringed at that and I got mad, putting a hand on her back. "Everyone likes pretty things, but Rarity doesn't hoard them for herself! She gets them so she can make something even MORE beautiful for others! She uses her love of beauty to help others, and you just keep it all for yourself!"
"Because I am the most beautiful thing of all," Clarity purred. "Aren't I, Spikey?"
"Lady Clarity, there is nothing in this whole world which can match your beauty, the fine smoothness of your white coat, the gentle perfect curls of your purple mane, the very color of royalty itself," Spikey said warmly.
"This is what happens when you bathe too often," Applejack said, shaking her head.
"Yeah, exactly," Rainbow Dash said. "No wonder she's so full of herself."
I cannot understand any mindset which exalts being filthy.
I heard Rarity's teeth grind, and then she said, "Marcus, darling, I think it's time to get this show under way so we can shove their words back in their mouths, though it may be hard as they're clearly full of themselves." She sounded quite angry and it was kind of thrilling, really.
"Okay," Twilight said. "Everyone look for weird things to point out to us, but I guess Marcus and I will have to do the identifying."
Given I'd been little use on the previous one, I was eager to take the lead here. Though Twilight likely knows more than I do.
"Got one," Pinkie said cheerfully, four seconds later, pointing to a painting of a pony busy baking a cake in an oven. Pony ovens involve heating coals in compartments above and below the main body of the oven, the heat diffuses inside the oven, allowing for nice even cooking and the smoke rises out through a pipe, keeping smoke off your food.
Twilight and I studied it. "Looks fine to me," Twilight said. "I really don't know baking." She paused, then looked around. "Wait, this is a modern oven and if these are in order, this would be... a long, long time ago."
"Exactly," Pinkie said, feeling satisfied. "That cake looks so tasty, though." She poked the oven and it began to glow softly. We did not die, so that's ONE.
Ugh, nine more to go with a trap for each one wrong.
"Ooh, this one has to be wrong," Rainbow Dash said, pointing to another one.
It was, in fact a red-coated pony with an orange mane, carrying King Halav into battle against the gnolls. You could see Zirchev by his side riding... is that Twilight's father? You could sort of make out some sort of blue pony being ridden in the background by Petra, but they were up on a hill casting a spell.
"Trixie?" Twilight said in disbelief. "DAD?"
"That's your father?" Rainbow Dash said. "I just noticed Big Mac."
"Who?" I asked.
"My brother. He isn't actually that big, though he is big for a Pony," Applejack said. "I think he'd like this, though." She sounded pleased herself.
"Well, this is definitely a historical error," Twilight said.
"Wait, this is SO blatant, there must be a trick," I said, stopping her hoof.
"Unfortunately, I didn't bring my histories," Twilight said in frustration. "This trip has gone VERY off the plan."
"If you had a real power like Knowledge," Dawn Gleaming said, a little tauntingly, "You would have known to, like I did, which is why I'm in the control room and you're going to die. Or you could just turn back."
"Ain't no turning back," Applejack said. "We made a promise."
Spitfire tried to crowd in. "It's two Unicorns and an Earth Pony," she said. "If this is the Unicorn route, maybe they should all be Unicorns?"
"I don't think Halav, Petra, or Zirchev rode any sentient Ponies," I said. "Applejack, you know Big Mac. Anything wrong with him here?"
She peered at it closely while Twilight illuminated it with her horn. "His cutie mark is wrong."
She pushed him and he glowed softly. "Score," Applejack said proudly.
"Dammit, that was MINE!" Rainbow Dash said. She sounded frustrated.
"Yeah, but I had to finish the job," Applejack said teasingly.
"Come look up near the top with me," Soarin' said to her.
She zoomed up where the rest of us couldn't see well. Spitfire did the same on the other side.
"Of course, if you had my power, you'd already know," Dawn Gleaming taunted Twilight. "You haven't gotten any of these yourself. So much for your studies."
Twilight fumed, pawing the ground.
"Don't let her goad you," I told Twilight. "It's a common trick."
Rarity now sidled up to her and began whispering to Twilight.
Meanwhile, Soarin' now announced, "Hah! Look, Spitfire!"
Spitfire said, "That's an easy one."
We all turned; they were looking at a hidden grotto where a pearl sat on an altar with Water Elves chanting and pouring sea water on it. Twilight came over. "That's the relic of the Water Elves, right? Specially created for them by the Immortal Calista Starbrow?"
"Yes, but it's actually much bigger," Soarin' said. "It's three feet across and they allowed us to witness it being returned to where it is kept in a giant oyster shell, not on an altar," he said. "No one but the keepers and we, the Wonderbolts, know this." He paused. "And, umm... you now."
Spitfire said, "We saw other things too but we won't talk about them, right, Soarin'?" There was just a little edge in her voice.
"Uh, yeah, we won't talk about them," he mumbled. "But it was the only way to get this one, right?"
Twilight rubbed her forehead. "So if you weren't here, we might not have ever gotten this. All the books made it sound like a normal pearl if they mentioned it at all."
Soarin' now touched the pearl with his hoof. It glowed softly.
"Unless, of course, like me, you read Oran Meditor's diaries!," Dawn Gleaming cackled. "Acquired for me by my wonderful little Sammy."
He now laughed and I ground my teeth.
"I wouldn't steal someone else's BOYFRIEND!" Twilight shouted angrily.
Boyfriend? She said diaries. I don't think Oran Meditor has a boyfriend, I think he's married. To a woman, just to be clear. He's the head of the Minrothad Guilds, by the way. IE, he's out to kill me, but not for stealing his diaries.
At least, I don't remember stealing them.
Wait, does she think I have a girlfriend? Who? Surely she doesn't think I'm involved with Helga when she's married or...Dammit, I am missing something.
Rarity mumbled something.
"I didn't steal someone else's boyfriend!" Dawn Gleaming said angrily; I heard a punching noise. "Come on, you stupid machine, punish them!"
No punishment happened.
"As long as we play by the rules, you have to as well!," Pinkie said. "It's the first part of a fun game like this one! I'm just hoping my game will be this cool when we get to it!" She hopped around excitedly.
Keraptis must have some sort of arcane machine, probably tapping the plane of shadows, given his reputation, which controls and reconfigures White Plume Mountain. Interesting.
I could hear a distant laughter.
"Shut up, Keraptis!" Sammy said.
I hear a noise like someone being hit with a pie.
"Pinkamena Diane Pie, you clean up that mess right this minute!" Pinkie barked with a suddenly serious voice.
"Yes, mother," we heard very faintly. After a few seconds of cleaning noises, we heard, "Aargh, you're not my mother!" Whoever it was sounded like a cranky Pinkie.
Pinkie rolled around, laughing.
We all started laughing.
"Shut up, you stupid constructs! You're not even supposed to exist!" Pinkamena shouted.
I frowned. That's what the dragon in my dreams... Marquetta... said to me. Dammit. Though they seem to think we are all fakes and they're the real ones.
"Hmm, could be clone hatred syndrome," Twilight said.
"What's that?" Applejack asked curiously.
"Many wizards clone themselves and put the clone on ice; if they die, it comes out of cold storage and then takes up their life. But if you and your clone are out roaming around at once, eventually, the clone goes mad and wants to kill the original."
"You're the clones!" Pinkamena shouted.
"You wait your turn, this is our trap!" Clarity said.
I now realized Fluttershy had been trying to get our attention the whole time. "Fluttershy?"
"Desert Willow," she said, pointing to a tree in the picture of Brute-men trying to hunt a mammoth, which was standing protectively between them and a baby mammoth. Fluttershy said, "It grows in hot, dry climates. Not ones with huge amounts of snow."
"I agree," Twilight said, sounding relieved.
Fluttershy smiled and touched the tree, which glowed.
"Twilight," Rarity said to her. "Can you date this?" She pointed to a picture of Ponies and humans fighting a huge epic battle by a riverbank. Flags were flying and armies of humans in chain with shield, spear, and shortbows were fighting angry unicorns, earth ponies with spear rigs, and pegasi. It was going badly for the human army, though the carnage was immense on both sides.
"This is the Battle of the East River, 126 AC, in which Duke Swift Hoof Blueblood II led the forces of Whinneychester and the Big Apple province to thwart an invasion by Corin II Anselwind," Twilight said. "Yes, he is the ancestor of the current Duke," she said regretfully to Rarity.
Blueblood. I'd give him a piece of my mind if he was present and if it wasn't probably suicide. Well, I might do it anyway; I've survived worse than an angry noble.
"What about Prance, the Dacoatas, and Mane?" Applejack asked. "I can see why the West and North Marechs would have to guard their own frontiers, but if Darokin was invading..."
"The Duke of Prance was pouting because Celestia would not marry him, so he invaded Sindh to 'avenge an insult'. The Dacoatas each sent only a handful of men," Twilight continued, "arguing they needed the strength to defend against the Buffalo. And the Duke of Mane launched his own invasion of Darokin, hoping to seize Akorros while Darokin's forces were in Equestria." Twilight sounded rather unhappy about the whole mess.
"They INVADED DAROKIN? Why?" Applejack asked, shocked.
"More land meant you could support more Lances of warponies," Twilight said. "And beat up your rivals, take their mares, the usual feudal insanity." She shook her head. "Remember, this is the Dark Age of Equestria. In the aftermath of... that..." she said, pointing to the Alicorn vs. Alicorn battle on the door, "the warponies ruled Equestria, while Celestia was struggling to deal with both the Sun AND the Moon."
"She suffered a Stroke," Ivan said softly. You could hear the capital letter.
"I am not aware of any medical problems," Twilight said hesitantly.
"When one Immortal delivers a heavy blow to another Immortal's followers or to the Immortal's plans, they often suffer a 'Stroke', which robs them of some of their power. Some petty immortals, especially those of Entropy, invest a lot of effort into delivering Strokes to each other," Ivan said. "Everyone assumed it was Nyx trying to deliver a Stroke to Ixion when the sun vanished at the Thyatian Emperor's coronation, but it was that," he said, pointing at the exit door. "Celestia's power dwindled and likely she got censured for something connected to this and had to reduce her involvement in the mortal world."
I stared. It made good sense, but I didn't expect it to come from Ivan of all people. He's not... he's VERY smart about some things, but... oh wait, I guess he's been studying Immortality because he hopes to be one.
Everyone looked at Ivan and each other uncomfortably.
"So the warponies ran the place to suit themselves," Ivan said.
"My father is a warpony and he does not just run riot," Rarity said somewhat tensely to Ivan.
"Your father grew up in a peaceful society which taught him that he is a defender of the innocent and a champion of justice and that he serves the state and the common good," Ivan said. "Duke Blueblood II grew up in a time in which you learned to kick people's ass so you could have a big herd of mares. Young colts either became warponies and served one of the noble stallions in hopes of rising to have their own followers or else became a servant or got driven into the wilderness to die because the family had too many children, right, Twilight?"
She stared at the ground. "Yes."
Now all the other ponies really shifted uncomfortably and avoided looking at Ivan or each other.
"Don't feel bad," Ivan said kindly. "Karameikos was just like that until thirty years ago and even now it's still kind of like that. I could have stayed and been my brother's servant all my life, or I could have joined the army and hoped to rise in the ranks, or I could go out and seek my fortune, like many young colts did then and still do. There's a thousand Duke Bluebloods and Dukes of Prance and Dukes of Mane in my nation's history. Halav, and Petra, and Zirchev may have founded us, but they basically left us to rot while they did... whatever they're doing." He sounded rather bitter. "Wolves on horseback have ruled Karameikos for millenia and what have 'our' immortals done about it? Nothing. We had to be conquered by the Thyatians to get our act together. For all that Duke Stefan is too naive for his own good, he is trying to be a good leader, trying to help everyone. He fails sometimes, because he trusts the wrong people. But he is still better than just about every leader we've had for two thousand years. I don't think any of you realize at all how lucky you are." Okay, VERY bitter.
"Hey, man, I'm sorry," I said. I didn't even realize how frustrated Ivan was about all this. I clapped his shoulder, not knowing what to do.
Ivan basically went down in a tide of ponies trying to comfort him. I nearly got trampled, being in the way. Soarin' and Spitfire both stayed up in the air, but everyone else basically mobbed him.
"I'm sorry," Fluttershy said to him softly, hovering by his head.
"You're not the ones who have been grinding Karameikos underfoot all these years. We did it to ourselves. We fought off the gnolls but our leaders just went on to either ravage everything or fail, over and over and over," he said, sounding frustrated. Then he stopped talking, possibly because he couldn't actually breathe with that many ponies trying to comfort him. Then he started crying, which I could tell embarrassed him intensely.
"I guess I never paid no attention to history, really," Applejack said. "The turnin' of the seasons was all the history I needed, and I do know a few things about agriculture. Seems like history's pretty depressin'."
"It's not all bad," Twilight said. "But some of it can be."
For a while, everyone worked on cheering Ivan up, while I tried to think of something I could do to cheer Ivan up. He's not normally so bitter.
"How did you get out of it?" he finally asked Twilight when the storm of hugs and nuzzles died down.
"Wait... get out of what?"
"Less hugs, more dying!" Dawn Gleaming said. "I can't get back to my studies so long as you're all roaming around loose."
"Dammit, the pie turned into a monster!" I heard evil-Applejack shout. "A shadow monster!"
Keraptis was laughing and I laughed too. I heard an odd noise and we couldn't hear them any more. "There's reasons Keraptis is still around to screw with people after all these centuries," I said, feeling an odd satisfaction from it.
"How did the end of feudalism come in Equestria?" Ivan asked.
"As time passed, the cities grew more prosperous. They attracted those excess young men to work and become craftponies, merchants, and traders. They developed machines which made it much easier for them to do a variety of tasks. While the feudal nobility spent their strength fighting each other, they grew strong. Then, when better outside armies showed up, the disorganized feudal forces could no longer win wars. Peace with the buffalo also reduced the need for decentralized military forces which could respond quickly to buffalo stampedes. They would eventually be replaced by our modern army and the nobility now dwindled in power and became courtiers, waiting on Princess Celestia," Twilight said.
Now that, I basically knew. Though now I wonder how much of it was Princess Celestia's maneuvers and how much was shifts in economic power. Farm yields are harder to increase than industry in the cities if you have someone to sell to. I suspect craftponies like Rarity did as much to end feudalism as Celestia did.
I now realized I was patting Rarity's back, as if she herself had ended feudalism. She looked at me and smiled and I smiled back at her. I think we'd been thinking the same thoughts.
"Rarity, why did you ask about the date?" I asked. Best we get back to the puzzle before monsters get unleashed to up the stakes.
Rarity turned to the picture NEXT to it, which showed a human woman busy operating a sewing machine. If you looked carefully, she was making the banner which was flown by the human leader in the next scene. "The sewing machine was invented MUCH later than this, and few humans have them even now; they were invented to help earth ponies and pegasi sew, since they can't use magic for it like I do. And even I find some sewing easier with one." Some sewing machines are magical but most are operated by a foot pump. (Magical ones are becoming pretty common in Glantri.) Earth ponies especially love them because they can operate a foot pump until the cows come home without getting tired. Equestria is more mechanized than a lot of countries because it's hard for ponies to do a lot of things without hands. The Darokinians and Minrothad Guilds have bought up or copied a lot of Pony tech, though. And sometimes invented things useful for the Ponies. They both go where the money is.
Rarity touched the sewing machine and it glowed. She smiled proudly.
"Good job," Twilight said, though one of her eyes twitched a little. Ponies often handle being outdone in their specialty or having it fail... badly.
"I couldn't have done it without your help," Rarity said graciously. "I did not know when this might be."
"Is the battle laid out correctly? It may have something too," I told Twilight.
She began studying it intently.
Spike burped and coughed up a letter. He passed it to Twilight. It was from 'Owlicious', who seems to be another assistant of Twilight. I wonder how he and Spike get on.
"The Falchion of Minroth is a Nithian style weapon," Twilight said. "It's a kind of sword with a curve at the end of the blade. Minroth was a mighty warrior and he lead the colonization of what is now the Minrothad Guilds by the Nithians. He later became the Immortal patron of the Isles, encouraging the five races to cooperate: human, elf, halfling, dwarf, and pony."
"Sphere of Matter," Ivan said. "He watches over his people." Ivan sounded rather frustrated about this.
Man, it's like Halav stole his girlfriend or something. I patted his shoulder. "We can jack Halav's chariot one day, man."
"I'm surprised we haven't already," he mumbled and we both laughed.
"What does it mean to 'jack' something?" Applejack asked curiously. "In that sense? My name indicates I'm really good with apples, but you seem to use it different."
"Differently," Rarity said a little pedantically just before Twilight could say it.
"Short for 'hijack'," I said. "Halav has a sacred chariot from the gnoll wars."
Rainbow Dash laughed loudly and we all stared at her. "I'm just imagining Ivan cruising around in a holy chariot with Applejack pulling it at high speed while Halav tries to chase you on foot."
"He'd never catch us," Applejack said proudly. "Not that stealin' someone's chariot is a good idea. Living well is the best revenge, Ivan."
Ivan's thoughtful look made me suspect Applejack would end up helping him to steal Halav's chariot one way or another.
Damn, I bet she could make that thing... "Hey, they should have been in chariots in that picture."
"Maybe it has two flaws in it?" Ivan said.
"You can't touch the absence of something," Twilight said. "I think."
"We can come back to it if we can't find the others," I said.
Searching now resumed.
************
Spike found a problem with a dragon's head. Spitfire touched something and couldn't explain why but she was right. I wondered how many secrets the Wonderbolts have. Ivan found an Asterius with a duck on his head. (Don't ask.)
Twilight was vibrating, clearly frustrated that she didn't have the books she needed and people kept finding things before she could. I suddenly wondered if the real goal of this puzzle was to make her explode and make us all ducks on Asterius' head.
Dash suddenly darted over and touched a picture of a triumphant pegasus winning a race. "Midnight Clear never actually won a race, he always came second! It made him CRAZY," she said.
This resulted in a herd of shadowy horses and ponies suddenly conducting their race across the room. I got trampled. Ivan leaped onto the back of one and managed to ride it. Fluttershy, Pinkie, and Twilight all joined me on the floor. Applejack instinctively joined the race and... slammed into the wall when they trampled off into another painting. The Wonderbolts and Rainbow Dash all darted up out of the mob's way.
Damn you, Dash! If you set off a trap, have the decency to get crushed with the rest of us!
Twilight began to titter disturbingly. "You could have ASKED someone, you know! I could have told you that Midnight Clear DID win a single race, in 857! But the prize was lost in a storm, to her frustration."
"But I thought..."
"Thinking is not your strong point!," Twilight said angrily. "Of course, I read up on Midnight Clear because I knew you admired her, but you never read the book I got you about her! I spent a lot of time trying to find a good book for you!"
"I read most of it," Rainbow Dash mumbled. "But the last part was all words in tiny print."
"Hey, I would have already gotten mine, but Applejack STOLE MY... thing. Whatever we'd call it!" Rainbow Dash said angrily.
"Hey, I had to find the problem, you just pointed me the right way," Applejack protested.
"Ask someone before you jump in!," Twilight shouted at her.
"Twilight, dear, fighting each other won't help, even if it is practice for when we have to fight our evil twins," Rarity said.
"We're not evil, we're BETTER," Dawn Gleaming said. "Of course, a Twilight Sparkle is the sign the day is dying and on its last legs," she said gleefully. "You're too busy helping other people to keep up on your studies. Which you are GETTING IN THE WAY OF MINE."
I had to do something terrible.
And possibly suicidal.
Twilight mumbled something about helping people, eyes starting to glow. Everyone backed up and got nervous, though I could see Pinkie steeling herself to step in.
I am definitely going to die if Pinkie is worried about intervening.
I dropped to my knees next to Twilight as she gathered breath and I whispered to her, "I'm sure Erik loved it when you took time away from your studies to help him, and he loved helping you. Didn't you enjoy that? I know I enjoy studying with you too."
Playing on a young woman's feelings is a terrible thing.
But the alternative is blowing up.
She was still breathing hard, but she was listening.
"Remember, pony magic is about Friendship," I told her softly. "It's when you work with your friends that you are strongest. You have a right to be proud of your mind. But you're our leader. You have to be strong. You know how Celestia governs. She doesn't thrust herself forward and do it all. She knows when she has to lead, like you and the water. And when to find the right pony for the job. You want to be like Celestia, right?" THAT sunk home. Celestia rules with a delicate touch. I admire that.
Spike now simply silently hugged Twilight and I felt her relax.
She then did an odd thing with her tongue, like... she was using her teeth to count something off? I guess with no fingers, you have to do that. Her eyes widened, and then suddenly she looked triumphant.
"Dash, look at the picture again. Study who is in the race," she said. "Marcus..." She began studying the pictures.
And then I saw it. The owlbear killing a man who I dimly remembered being. Somehow. Thick beard, dark hair, olive skin. Dmitri Ilyanovich. You could see him, his legs tangled in vines in the Malpheggi as he stumbled out of quicksand, and now an owlbear flew down silently and attacked him from behind. I remembered that and I don't know how it could be me, but I cringed at the sight. Most owlbears can't fly but this one also had wings. Damn, that's ugly. Silent, deadly flight. He had hardly any gear and what he had was charred.
Twilight's gaze followed mine. Dash was now carefully studying the race picture very carefully.
"You know him?" Twilight asked softly.
It was me. I don't understand how, this man was not some kind of construct, but... right? He doesn't look like a flesh golem or anything.
To my surprise, Rarity was now at my side and I put a hand on her back. I felt my nerves unclench a little. "Shouldn't it not have wings?" Rarity asked.
"Certain rare ones have more owl in them and have wings," I said. "They're extremely dangerous because they can fly utterly silently."
"Yeah," Spike said. "You never hear Owlicious coming." He shivered.
"He's an Owl?"
"Would anyone not an owl name themselves that?" Spike asked me.
Okay, probably not. I studied it. This must be the one for me.
Twilight's shift of attitude was surprising. She'd gone from two inches from a nervous breakdown to a sudden confidence. She believed I would find the answer. Which, if Dash did her thing right, would mean all of us BUT her had solved one, though she'd helped many of us.
It's a Friendship test, I realized. I'd just been trying to calm her down, but, in fact, this was a test to put pressure on her to see if she snapped and had a freak out. With her power... that could be ugly.
And because I know how to manipulate people, I had been able to save her from herself. And because I wanted to help her, because she is my friend. None of the others study with her, except Spike. They know how important her learning is to her, but they don't share that love of it, except as it touches their own lives. Because they all have their own specialized knowledge. Twilight can't know everything, much as she'd like to.
Much as I would like to.
I understand her frustration. It's not easy to rely on others. But she is the Element of Magic which means the Element of Friendship. Which is why Celestia has her 'studying' it. The stronger her bonds to others, the stronger she is. She probably can't compete with Dawn Gleaming, if Gleaming really is tied to 'Knowledge' somehow. Not directly.
But then, only fools take people on in their strength. You find their weakness and then you hit them in it.
I can see what Celestia is doing; I just hope Twilight can handle it. That she likes it. I think she does, but...
Of course, I have no right to judge at all, after what I just did. Pushing her feelings around for my own benefit. Mind you, I think I have the right not to die horribly.
I tried to push away the angst. To remember this. Most of the group was watching me, though Applejack was studying the race with Rainbow Dash, talking to her quietly. They seem like good friends to me. Soarin' was trying to help her too.
"You might as well give up, you sad copy," evil me said. "You're just a construct. You're all just copies. Your minds full of holes. But you're more like a twentieth generation copy. It's all wearing out. Hard to remember, right?"
"Be silent, prattler," Rarity said angrily. "You are the copy, and you will be silent and leave Marcus alone."
"Ahah! Bluebonnet wasn't even BORN yet, let alone racing when Midnight Clear was at the top of her game!" Dash said and tapped. Nine glows now.
I tried to remember but my mind didn't want to remember, the claws, the screaming, Yalla screaming...
Yalla?
Someone else was there?
Someone... I could remember a hat. A very nice double-layered hat made from that manticore's hide. She'd feared the dragon's treasure was cursed and by that point, it was just us left.
But she had refused to take any of the treasure. I had finally, reluctantly discarded the last of the treasure and the two of us were trying to make our way down to Port Tenobar. We'd take ship to Thyatis; that would give us enough space.
And then the owlbear showed up. It would have caught her, but I attacked it and... I must have killed it or wounded it enough to drive it off and Yalla must have dragged me to Tenobar to have me raised or reincarnated or something. Had there been a druid?
Maybe. Yalla liked druids.
"He didn't die like this, he died saving his companion, a halfling named Yalla from the owlbear," I said firmly, then pushed the painting where she SHOULD have been. Her outline glowed and now there was a humming noise.
"How could you even know that? I didn't even know that one, the machine picked it out!," Dawn Gleaming said angrily.
"I knew that one," Sammy said.
Clarity laughed softly. "Well done," she said. "Hard work is rewarded."
"Don't CONGRATULATE them," Dawn Gleaming said angrily.
"But he knew exactly where to touch. That is precision, and I admire deftness and precision," Clarity said.
Spikey made a growling noise.
"You know you're my favorite dragon, yes you are," Clarity said and now they cooed at each other.
Spike's eyes crossed.
"Now you just open the door and come through," Dawn Gleaming said wearily.
"Once I disarm it," Twilight said. "I studied both of these incidents," she continued. "This is something I am an expert on." She touched Nightmare Moon's head. "Her helmet is wrong." Then she touched the priest behind the Emperor. "He's dressed in a sixth century style."
Now the door swung open. "Knowledge is power... but Friendship means I have access to the knowledge of everyone I know, not just my own," Twilight said. "Come on, everyone. This dungeon isn't going to defeat itself."
The sound of Dawn Gleaming pouting and Sammy trying to comfort her ushered us out of the room and off down a hallway towards our next doom... room.
*****************
Rainbow Dash pulled me back and whispered to me, "What did you say to her? Whatever it was, it calmed her right down."
"I just reminded her about how her element is Friendship," I said. "And how trying to go head to head with someone when they're better by definition isn't wise. Better to find a way where YOU are stronger."
Rainbow Dash said, "Yeah, but what if they're better at your strong point?"
"Everyone has weaknesses," I said. "Obviously, if you're playing a sport or something, you may not be able to exploit those weaknesses." This is why I don't play sports. "But the rest of the time, it's best to be like water and flow around obstacles." That was my favorite saying from my brief attempt to be a monk.
Hitting gongs with my head did not bring me to enlightenment, however.
I thought about Dmitri. How old am I? I don't seem to be getting any older, whatever is happening to me. Dammit, what IS going on?
"See, I know someone who is a really good athlete," Rainbow Dash began.
"I'm sure Applejack would be happy to help you improve your skills," I told her.
"..."
It was pretty obvious, really.
"See, she c..." Rainbow Dash looked at me, then sighed. "We never did quite settle which one of us is the better athlete."
"A good rivalry helps you both improve," I told her. "Anyway, I'm not a specialist like you ponies, so I have to be flexible and find ways to turn weaknesses on people because I never win head-to-head. Even at cards, which I'm good at, I have to outthink people to win."
"Doesn't that mean you're a specialist at out-thinking people?" Rainbow Dash said, grinning.
"I..."
Okay, she has me there.
"I never thought of it like that. Thanks, Rainbow Dash." I couldn't help smiling a little.
For some reason, Rainbow Dash looked at her Cutie Mark, then cracked up. "Is it really true humans never get any kind of sign what their place in life is?"
"Totally true," I told her.
"That must make deciding what to do with your life once you're not a kid hard," Rainbow Dash said.
"A lot of people just do what their parents did," I told her. "But some of us, like Ivan and I, spend our lives searching for it, and we may or may not ever find it."
"Well, I hope you do," Rainbow Dash said, patting my shoulder.
"Me too," I told her.
Right now, though, I'm going to worry about NOT DYING.
***************
I touched my hat, reminding me of how I now have the most awesome hat in the party, though Applejack's remains a work of simple elegance, well suited for her. I will not stare at it lest my hat grow jealous, of course.
Rarity made a happy noise as we went up the stairs together. I smiled at her. "Thank you again. It brings me peace of mind."
I heard Soarin' say to Rainbow Dash, "I think the hat is his girlfriend." My love for hats is PURE, not carnal, I will tell you!
But I just laughed and so did Rarity. She made a come hither gesture and I leaned down and she said softly, "I think they make a good couple, don't you?"
"Marcus can be a little weird, but I think he has a crush on me, actually," Rainbow Dash said to Soarin', thinking no one would hear, but I heard. "But we're not, you know, an item," she said very quickly. "I dunno what Twilight was thinking."
"Yes," I said softly to Rarity. Evenly matched in not understanding the universe, anyway.
What was Twilight thinking? Or maybe it was just because... I don't know.
Does she think...
I could see Spike glaring at me. I can see why, given he has a crush on Rarity. I can't believe I took so long to notice.
Rarity looked thoughtful.
"What's on your mind?" I said to her.
"We should talk, when this is over and we can get some privacy," she said to me.
"Okay," I told her. "Your company is quite delightful to me, fair lady Rarity."
She smiled a small smile. "You are a flatterer, Marcus."
"It's my nature," I said. "I think Marquetta must have told them we are constructs. She called me a failed experiment when she invaded my dreams."
"She didn't call me that but she did try to bribe me," Rarity said, frowning. "As if I was for sale. Admittedly, it was a very pretty pile of treasure." A single drop of sweat rolled down her cheek. "But I am not so easily bought," she said firmly.
I frowned. Why me? Dammit, what is going on? I'd just kind of settled into my rut of chaos, but now, I have the feeling I've been missing something. Like how I keep not dying.
"Anyway, I don't think you are an experiment, and if you are, I'd consider it a successful one," she said, then patted my leg.
"Thanks, Rarity," I told her. "You flatterer, you."
We smiled at each other. It's nice to know someone who knows how to play the game.
My brain chose NOW to suddenly put various pieces together. Twilight has shapeshifting magic. Dawn Gleaming and Sammy apparently use it when they want to bump rump, as Pinkie would put it. Twilight learned a rite which summons human clothing and probably others. ...
My brain then chose this moment for a DAMN FLASHBACK.
I still hate them.
**************
Lyra was one of my students, who had a turquoise coat and cyan mane. She was about to graduate from the school; she was a bardic specialist but she was also my best student. I'd noticed the bardics tended to have the most interest in Humanics, in part because I used a lot of music for my teaching. I'm terrible, but my students love to sing. And things like epic lays really seemed to hook them.
Lyra also was more bipedal than most ponies. Though she'd wander around on all fours out of class, in class, she went around bipedally and used an actual chair with her desk, which got a lot of stares.
"So how are things with you and Octavia, Lyra?" I asked her after class; I was about to head over to Twilight's place for the usual evening of work. Lyra was seeing one of the royal musicians, Octavia, an Earth Pony double-bass player.
"We're pals, Professor Erik," she said cheerfully.
"Just pals?" I asked; it was pretty clear Octavia wanted more than that. And I'd certainly seen them kissing, though Octavia got very embarrassed over such things in public.
"Yeah, it's nothing serious," Lyra said.
"I think Octavia thinks it's serious."
"We both know how it goes," Lyra said sagely, ambling along beside me. She began playing her harp as we walked, a marching song from Darokin.
"The Ballad of the Far Sellers," I told her.
"Yeah! I have a cousin, works for the Darokin Diplomatic Corps. He gets to see EVERYTHING." Lyra had a dreamy look in her eyes.
I knew where this was going. I'm sorry, Octavia. I think you're in love with someone who has the wandering bug. I was like that for a long time, but I think... I may actually stick around here a good while.
Having roots felt weird, and I missed seeing Helga and Ivan. But Helga was married now and Ivan was off on some 'secret important thing'. Also, Princess Carnelia can't kill me here when I am under Princess Celestia's protection.
I hope.
"Well, you should make sure Octavia understands, so you don't end up finding out how hard an Earth pony can kick."
Really damn hard, that's how hard.
There was a sudden glimmering around us and sparkles of light flew through the air. It was Moondancer, one of the advanced bardic students. Like Twilight, she hadn't been satisfied with the basic degree, but had stayed on to do advanced studies. She sometimes does... something or another with Princess Celestia which is top secret but which she cannot resist bragging about obliquely. Moondancer had a white coat with a black mane and the crescent moon on her flank. Her mane, however, had star-like flecks of silver in it.
Moondancer was dancing to the Ballad of the Far Sellers, leaping around us; her magic makes her as nimble as an Earth Pony and seems to produce star dust and moonglow when she dances. That's what she says, anyway.
"Hello, Moondancer," I said to her.
"Hello, Professor Erik," she said. "Don't mind me, I was inspired by Lyra's performance."
Lyra grinned. "Come on, Professor, sing."
"I might drive you deaf," I warned them.
I know a fair number of songs. BADLY. But for some reason, my students want me to sing.
I guess everyone needs something to laugh at.
o/~ Another day, another city,
o/~ Another horizon beckons to me.
o/~ Though home calls to me,
o/~ I must leave it behind.
Lyra sang softly, but I doubt even Moondancer could hear it; I had to carry it.
Unfortunately, given Lyra's singing voice is maybe ten times better than mine. But for some reason, Lyra wanted me to lead.
Moondancer circled us as we walked along, me singing, Lyra playing and singing faintly, wrapping a haze of moonglow and stardust around us. Other ponies turned and looked at us and I felt somewhat embarrassed.
o/~ Faithful wagon, carry me far
o/~ Faithful wagon, follow that star
o/~ You haul my goods and my fortune too
o/~ For I am a Far Seller
o/~ A traveler on the sea of fate
o/~ The needs of others beckon me
o/~ And I cannot be late.
Several of Moondancer's friends ran up and joined us now, dancing along with her, some of them singing as well, counter-point to my point, their high pitches to my low.
o/~ I've got twenty miles to go by twilight's gleaming.
o/~ Those distances can be deceiving.
o/~ The wheels go round and round,
o/~ Hauling me from town to town
Several of Lyra's friends joined us now, adding a flute, drums, and a violin to the mix. This song is usually played on the flute, violin, and drums, so this was perfect.
Suspiciously perfect. I smell a plot.
We reached the central plaza of the school with a fountain; classroom buildings ring it and beyond it are various dorms. Including the faculty building I live in. Tons of students were here, but now about half of them joined us to sing, dance, or play the chorus.
o/~ Faithful wagon, carry me far
o/~ Faithful wagon, follow that star
o/~ You haul my goods and my fortune too
o/~ For I am a Far Seller
o/~ A traveler on the sea of fate
o/~ The needs of others beckon me
o/~ And I cannot be late.
Then Octavia came out with the rest of the Royal Orchestra (which is remarkably small, consisting of a harpist, a double-bassist, a piano player, and a tuba player). Now we had everyone singing and dancing.
Okay, Lyra DEFINITELY planned this.
The next part was more complicated; the men would sing a line and then the women would carry the secondary chorus.
o/~ Rockhome makes machines
o/~ Haul them to Equestria
o/~ Equestria delves for silver
o/~ Haul them to Karameikos
o/~ Karameikos weaves the woolens
o/~ Haul them to the Northern Reaches
o/~ The Northern Reaches plunder some gold
o/~ Haul them to Rockhome
o/~ And then the circle starts again!
I half-expected to see Celestia come out and join us, but instead, Twilight confronted us all.
"STOP!" she shouted and we all fell silent.
"This is a school! People cannot study if they are singing and dancing! If other people are so loud no one can hear themselves THINK." Twilight was quite passionate about this. "Erik, what are you doing? Why are you encouraging this?"
"It's a lesson," I said, throwing myself on the bomb. "This is a classic human song which teaches all about trade routes and products in a fun way." And now Lyra owes me.
Twilight looked utterly flummoxed. "I... well..."
"Anyway, to continue the lesson..."
"You'd better come study with us," Lyra said deadpan to Twilight. "Or you might get behind."
Twilight yelped and leaped over to us, licking her lips nervously. "I will do my best," she mumbled.
"Of course you will," I told her. She always does.
o/~ Faithful wagon, carry me far
o/~ Faithful wagon, follow that star
o/~ You haul my goods and my fortune too
o/~ For I am a Far Seller
o/~ A traveler on the sea of fate
o/~ The needs of others beckon me
o/~ And I cannot be late.
There are ten more verses. Suffice it to say, we were dancing a long time. Spike joined us around the time the caravan reached Wendar; he'd put on a top hat and suit and had a cane and did his own dance routine, which everyone forced me to join him in. I'm not too comfortable dancing in public, though I can at least handle a formal dance. It's a great place for hitting on women.
But this kind of show routine, it's not my strength.
Twilight has a good singing voice for someone who says she hates to sing, I will note.
Finally, I fell down and Spike fell onto my stomach. I hardly felt it. "I am so tired."
Worse, the ponies were not tired, though they were kind of sweaty. Except for Twilight, who flopped down next to me.
"Erik, this lesson nearly killed me," she mumbled.
"Me too, but you'll never forget those trade routes now," I told her.
"And neither will I," Celestia said.
....
Twilight leaped to her feet, wobbled and had to be propped up by Lyra, who was grinning. Octavia now helped prop me up and Moondancer helped Spike. Mind you, we then all fell down when we tried to bow to Celestia.
She simply sat down by us, so everyone sat down. "My little ponies, it pleases me greatly to see you all so happy. Erik, I greatly enjoyed your lesson. I am glad to see so many happy students as well. And Twilight, my dear student, you performed very well. You too, Spike."
"I did my best," Twilight said, smiling goofily.
Spike said to the grass, "Thanks, your highness."
"It was everyone together," I said, trying to fake humility. I couldn't help but smile, though.
"Can you do the Saga of Ottar the Just?" Celestia asked. "It being a song of your homeland, I'm sure you must know it."
I am going to DIE. Ottar the Just was the founder of Vestland, overthrowing the tyrannical rule of the Ostlanders about three hundred and seventy-five years ago. The Saga of Ottar the Just is SIX HOURS LONG.
"We can do a selection from it," I said. "The full thing is so long, we'd all miss dinner and you would have to leave for the moon rise ceremony."
"Where are we starting, Erik?" Twilight whispered to me. "Maybe with his big speech to King Finnbogi's representatives?" Finnbogi, of course, was the King of Ostland who Ottar revolted against.
"Okay, I will be Ottar, Spike, I want you to be King Finnbogi's men, Twilight, you will be Inga, Lyra, you are the narrator.." I began assigning roles. Inga, as I'm sure you know, was Ottar's wife the rune-crafter. She it was who forged his mighty sword Rettsvesen and carved upon it the runes of justice, strength, and victory. Most of the ponies would be the chorus, but there were a lot of roles. Octavia began organizing the musicians more coherently. Moondancer got the dancers ready.
I do not actually know how I stayed functional; the second we stopped for Celestia to go to the moon raising ceremony (taking Moondancer with her), even the bardic students had to sit down and rest. I sprawled out under the sky as the stars began to come out. Twilight identified them all, one by one. Well, not all, but the major ones. This got harder and harder as more came out and by the end, she was panting for breath.
"Lyra," she said. "I need to collaborate with you on our project for a while."
I didn't know they had a project together.
"Sorry, Professor," Lyra said to me. "We have to go make out."
"WE ARE NOT MAKING OUT!" Twilight shouted and everyone looked at her.
Octavia just laughed and kissed Lyra, then rolled to her hooves. She got her double-bass. "We have to perform again in an hour, but it was worth it. See you later, dear."
"See ya, Octavia! You're still the prettiest pony in Canterlot," Lyra said with that winning smile of hers.
Octavia turned red, said something incoherent, then summoned her dignity. "Thank you, Lyra," she said, then her group headed out.
"Spike, wanna just lie here until we die?" I said to him.
"Sounds like a plan, Professor," he said.
"I'll make sure he gets to bed," I told Twilight. "At the usual time."
"I don't need to be tucked in! I am not a baby any more!" Spike shouted.
Yes, you are, Spike. But you're a good guy.
"He can only have three donuts or he will take forever to get to sleep, Erik," Twilight told me.
"I know," I told her. "I remember last week." He ate an entire box of donuts. He didn't fall asleep until dawn, then he was cranky for two days.
"Okay, see you later, Erik," Twilight said to me.
"See you later, Twilight," I said to her.
"Thanks, Prof," Lyra whispered to me, then cantered over to Twilight. "Come, fair Twilight, I will show you the wonders of the night life. We will make a song they will remember forever!" She swept her arms grandly.
Lyra is a GIANT ham who over does everything.
"We're just STUDYING," Twilight said urgently, glancing back at us.
"Have fun! I'll see you when I remember how to stand up!" I shouted.
When they were gone, Spike said, "It's nice having a guy to hang out with."
"Yeah, I know," I told him. Spike's kind of... dragons mature weirdly. Sometimes he's like a little kid and sometimes he is rather grown up. But he's fun to be around. "Any chance you could send a letter to have food delivered to us?"
"Best idea ever," he said.
*****************
"Please tell me I didn't zone out for too long," I said to Rarity.
Rarity started. "I'm sorry, I was having a flashback," she said, embarrassed. "I think. Well, I'm not sure what that was."
Pinkie was freaking out for some reason, bouncing upside down on her head, I think. "Why am I sensing singing and dancing when I can't hear or see any?" she said, agitated. "And why wasn't I invited?"
"No, Pinkie, WAIT," Ivan said.
Then Pinkie bounced onto a pit trap and fell in.
The rush of wind from Rainbow Dash in action threw us all against the walls, but she saved Pinkie from plummeting down into very hot water, a hundred and fifty feet down. Steam rose until Ivan closed and locked the trap.
I stared in surprise. She... has really good reaction time, I see.
Rainbow Dash was grinning.
"I'm sorry, I was... I'm not sure what it was but it had singing and dancing," Rarity said, sounding a little embarrassed and frustrated.
"I was remembering singing and dancing too," I confessed.
"Me too," Twilight said.
We all looked at each other.
"Well, I think there were multiple layers of trap," Ivan said. "The unicorns all get entranced, then walk right into the pit trap you were all headed for until Pinkie freaked out."
"It was strange, I was watching you and some... that must have been Erik," Rarity said. "He was blond, right?"
"Yes, it was the time we all performed part of the Saga of Ottar the Just for Celestia," Twilight said, eyes wide. "I was soo tired and Erik and Spike couldn't even move." She rubbed her forehead. "Did you see it all?"
I felt a little better knowing it was a trap and not creeping senility. Then WORSE, knowing that Rarity had seen... well, okay, she saw nothing to indicate that was ME.
"I saw it too," I said. "But I didn't see you, Rarity."
"I was watching from an upstairs window in... some building," Rarity said.
"I was on the east side; I think I was in a lab." I think that building had labs.
"Stupid trap, TRAP ME TOO NEXT TIME!" Pinkie said, shaking her fist at the wall. "I missed something cool!"
"That was Lyra as the narrator, right?" Rarity said.
"Yes," Twilight said. "She was dating Octavia at the time. I'm not sure what happened but shortly after I moved to Ponyville, she did too and I guess she and Octavia must have broken up as I see her with Bon-Bon all the time now."
Do not comment, I told myself.
Still, I suspect I know what Twilight's 'secret project' was.
Dammit.
Well, I can't change the past. And we have to focus or we'll fall in the next trap.
Ivan grabbed me. "Focus, Marcus! Unless you enjoy stepping into traps."
It was a dart trap this time.
I felt quite embarrassed.
**************
Applejack sat on me, smirking just a little. "No hat for you, sugarcube."
"It's so pretty," I mumbled, hating myself for wanting it so much, especially when I have this very fine hat Rarity made me.
The fact that Pinkie was sitting on Rarity helped. "It would look so nice on my head," she mumbled.
"Eight traps," Ivan said to Twilight. "Three magical."
They began slowly disarming the traps. "I think the hat is magical," Twilight said to Ivan.
"Oooh, can it make cakes?" Pinkie asked.
"The magic's probably a trap," Applejack said.
"It's bait," Ivan said, cutting open the pillar it stood on with my magic sword. He paused and studied it. It was not curved at the end; I'd thought about that too. But I am pretty sure I... got this... somewhere... DAMMIT.
"Hey, Twilight, any chance this thing is shapeshifted?" he asked Twilight.
"Command it to show it's true form," she said.
It shimmered and turned into a blade with a curved end. I could feel a flashback trying to come on. Damn you, flashbacks, I won't let you take me!
"I promise you, I won't go for the hat if you let me up," Rarity said to Pinkie.
"Can't take that chance," Pinkie said.
She tried to telekinese Pinkie and failed.
"Marcus, are you about to hallucinate singing and dancing?" Pinkie asked me.
"Not if I can help it," I said, gritting my teeth. Damn you, flashbacks!
"It might help to remember whatever your brain is trying to tell ya," Applejack said. "Lying to yourself isn't healthy."
I felt something... scrying... a moving eye...
"Turn it back," I said hastily to Ivan, who did so. "I think Marquetta might sense it if it isn't disguised."
He did so but he continued to use it to disarm the traps.
"So you were Dimitri," Ivan said to me as he worked.
"I guess I was, though I don't know how that's possible." I sighed. "Maybe I am some kind of construct."
"It doesn't matter," Rarity said. "To be the work of someone's hands is a good thing, not a bad one. And you are a fine work of craftsmanship." Her voice was firm. "Pinkie, PLEASE let me up," she said, starting to whine. Pinkie's eyes crossed. "I am scuffing up my coat and you're wrinkling my hair and I can smell the cupcakes on your breath."
Pinkie's eyes crossed.
"Hold on," Applejack said. "Don't let her buck you."
"I can smell the concrete and... achoo!" Now she sneezed.
"It's granite, actually," Pinkie said. "As you might expect. I'm hoping for some obsidian."
"So does this thing have any special tricks?" Ivan asked Twilight.
"If it can disguise itself as a mundane weapon, it probably can only use its powers when fully revealed, which would at the very least, draw Minroth's attention," Twilight said. "Which might not be a bad thing."
"I think we might get Marquetta in our face and on our case if we did that," I said.
"I'm surprised Minroth hasn't gone looking for it by now," Twilight said.
"Maybe he has but he can't find it," I said. "So what does the hat do, Twilight?"
"Hat of Disguise," Twilight said. "Limited shapeshifting, changes your clothing if you have any. I could look like any pony, you could look like any human."
"You should give it to Marcus," Rarity said. "He could..."
"You should give it to Rarity; I have a fine hat she made me," I said. I wanted that hat SO MUCH, but I didn't want to insult Rarity by rejecting the hat she made me by hand even if... dammit.
Rarity smiled. "Thank you, Marcus."
"Only once it's safe," Twilight said; I could see her picking the weaves apart around the hat, faster than I could follow or hope to accomplish. I am jealous of her skills, I have to admit.
It's easy to see why Celestia has chosen her for eventual immortality. I suppose she'll do the one where you have to convince all the other mages near you to kiss your ass. Or if Celestia is up to the crazy shit I think she is... something no one's ever seen before.
The Hat was soon carefully removed and placed on Rarity's head. "You can let me up now, Pinkie," Rarity said.
"What? I'm sorry, I was suffering song and dance deprival. Since no one invited me to their flashback!" Pinkie said, pouting.
"Fine, you can come to my next flashback," Twilight said.
"YAY!"
Hug time now.
I helped Rarity up and we adjusted the hat. Then she turned herself into Applejack. She laughed. "This is fun." Then she became... a sort of high society version of Applejack. Elaborately curled and coiffed hair, a fancy light blue ballgown and everything. "I can use this to test out dress designs!," she squealed, delighted.
"I bet that's what evil Applejack looks like," Rainbow Dash mused.
"I wasn't evil, just a naive kid," Applejack mumbled.
"You used to look like that?" I said, surprised.
"Well, like that but younger," Applejack said. "I tried the high society thing but... it wasn't me." She sighed. "It wasn't all bad, but there was a lot of faking that I didn't enjoy and I don't know how Manehattanites avoid starvin' to death."
"Hmm..." Rarity said. POOF. She now looked like Celestia. "Hello, my little ponies."
Everyone laughed and bowed.
"I will have to thank Keraptis, this is absolutely smashing," Rarity said. Her eyes widened. "I can look clean and tidy even when I am not!" Bling, instant clean.
"You look great, Rarity," Spike said. "Do your gala dress."
Bling, instant fancy red dress. "Thank you, Spike, an excellent choice. Hah. Hahaha!" Rarity began laughing happily and I couldn't help but laugh.
I just hope it isn't some kind of trap.
************
"I do not need to be sat on," Twilight said, irritated, as several ponies loomed over her, ready for sitting.
It was, in fact, a library, full of books, some of which I would have wanted for myself if I was sure they weren't all traps. Ivan and I were carefully checking everything. Twilight was as well.
"Oooh, chess puzzles," Soarin' said, studying several books.
"You're into chess?" I asked.
"It's a lot of fun and I like chess puzzles, though I'm not great at them."
"Chess puzzles?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Yes, they usually involve deducing how the board got to its current state with a set of clues to help you," he said. "It's a lot of fun."
Rainbow Dash looked dubious. Spitfire bobbed about nervously. Spike was studying the books. "Ahah!" he said, pointing to one bookcase. "This is the most important one."
It turned out to have books about boating, rivers, waterways, and the like. "I agree," Twilight said. "Good job, Spike."
Spike smiled brightly.
The library had no exits; we suspected you had to do something with the books, which now appeared to be safe.
Safe if we solve the puzzle, anyway.
"Maybe they need to be in alphabetical order," Pinkie said.
They were rather jumbled up. Keyfus' Age of Sail sat next to Reynauld's Study of Nithian Canoes next to Anabaxius' History of Fourth Century Trade next to the The Little Big Book of Pretty Boats.
Unfortunately, without any clues, it was unclear what to do. "The theme is river," I said. "So there has to be some kind of clue in that."
"Build a raft out of the books," Applejack joked.
Fluttershy studied the books and made a hesitant noise.
"What is it?" Rarity asked her.
"There are no books on river or sea animals or plants. Maybe they have to be filled in from elsewhere?" she said.
We found twenty; adding them got us an audible click. Twilight also sent us looking for other river/water/sea books of which we found twenty two. Click.
Putting them all in alphabetical order got us a click but left some gaps.
A bell now chimed. "FINALLY," Dawn Gleaming said. "Have fun with the wandering monsters!"
Oh bloody hell.
"Say what?" Applejack said.
"Oh, I've never heard a chime announce they were coming but dungeons often have roaming monsters which show up for no good reason," I told her. "I guess this one has a timer."
It was... a giant flying brain with a huge beak and many tentacles. Holding lighting wands. Along with two huge shambling piles of leaves, vines, swamp muck, and for some reason, lightning. "Marcus, Spike, I want you two to finish looking for suitable books and solve this puzzle. We'll deal with the monsters," Twilight said.
Spike and I began searching, while Applejack charged one of the muck monsters. Unfortunately, kicking it got her legs snared inside it and she began getting electrozapped.
The Wonderbolts went for the brain, battering it around and dodging lightning; books began getting zapped but they had it in hand.
Rainbow Dash studied the muck monsters, then zoomed down and began flying around the one that had Applejack, twisting and bending the air. Its lightning began to bend in on itself.
Twilight lit the other one on fire with my spell. Which she'd clearly learned by watching me. I was jealous again. However, the muck monster was soggy enough not to burn well.
Rarity said, "Find what holds it together, and I will shoot it," she said, calling up arrows.
Pinkie now slammed a pie into the face of the other muck monster. It bumbled into a bookcase, knocking it down, then she kicked another bookcase down onto it.
Applejack now got loose and copied Pinkie, laughing she did so. "Sorry, Twilight but need does what needs must!"
What?
Dash now dove into a pile of books and whipped them into a whirlwind, chewing up the muck monster which had hurt Applejack. Including a book I was reaching for.
"Wait!" I said as the book came apart, slicing off the muck monster's limbs.
"Hah! Yes! Now it's time for the BONUS ROUND," Dawn Gleaming said.
The floor vanished and we plummeted towards an inverse step pyramid. Basically a terraced pit descending down to a small space with a door at the bottom. Half the terraces were water tanks full of giant crabs.
Dash grabbed me. Spitfire grabbed Ivan. Soarin' saved Spike. Twilight teleported onto a dry terrace. Pinkie formed into a diving formation and simply plunged laughing into the water. Rarity plunged into a tank, yelling loudly. Fluttershy saved herself and now began flying down to the rest of us. The great brain flying thing flew down after us. The swamp monsters fell into one of the tanks and began having an electrical punchout with some of the giant crabs. Applejack landed on her feet on one of the solid terraces to my surprise. She wobbled a little but was fine.
I wouldn't... well, I won't object.
The flyers deposited Ivan, me, and Spike by Twilight, then took to the sky after the flying brain. I could hear Pinkie thrashing in one of the tanks. Rarity was thrashing in another one, several tiers up from my position. Lightning crackled in another tank as the crab vs. muck monster fight continued.
"Fluttershy, can you take me to Rarity?" I asked.
She flew me over, though I could tell she wasn't great at carrying anyone this heavy. Then she sang a quick song and we both plunged into the water, where Rarity was trying to hold her breath and speargun oncoming crab monsters. I held off one of the creatures while Fluttershy enchanted Rarity. Go druids!
Then we drove back the crabs and clambered out of the tank. Fluttershy was a very fluid swimmer, I noticed, moving very freely and comfortably.
A crab was trying to climb out of its tank and down to Twilight, but she zapped it with a lightning ball and it fell back in its tank. Applejack now jumped down to my level. "Get on," she said.
"I don't think you're big enough," I began.
"Just curl up real tight," Applejack said.
"It was not comfortable but she easily leaped over the next tank and down to Twilight's level. Rarity nearly fell in and Twilight had to drive off a crab.
We actually had to force Pinkie out of the tank where she was trying to teach the crabs to dance. The Wonderbolts and Dash downed the floating brain.
I could hear Keraptis say something.
"This thing had better take pony agility and strength into account when it's time for the other paths or they'll finish in five minutes!" Clarity said, frustrated.
"I'll make it four minutes flat!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Oh really? It's ON," Clarity said to her. "This is going to be the best DEATHTRAP EVER!" She began to laugh.
Rainbow Dash high-hoofed Soarin'. "We are going to NAIL the next one."
I studied the setup. This would have been a pain in the ass for heavily armored humans and the like to get around. But I think our foes or more likely Keraptis' control devices under-estimated us.
That won't happen twice.
*************
I picked up the key and passed it to Twilight. Key number one, two to go. But it's now time for sleeping.
On a stone cold floor in a room close to evil crab tanks; those things click their claws for no reason ALL THE DAMN TIME.
We needed to sleep but were too wired yet to do so, so we basically set up our camp as best we could, posted Applejack, Ivan, and Soarin' as the first guards, then hung out and talked quietly. Rarity kept changing her outfit and accessories with the hat gleefully, with Spike egging her on. Twilight and I both read quietly, though my brain was surging.
"Hey, I'm sorry about your country," Applejack said softly to Ivan, thinking no one would hear.
I heard.
"Not your fault," he said. "I probably made it sound worse than it is, but it could be so much better. It's why I want to become an Immortal, to be a REAL patron to our land. I dunno what Halav, Petra, and Zirchev are doing now, but they left us to rot. I don't know if I can do it, but I have to try."
"What happens if you fail?" Applejack asked.
"Usually, you die trying. In which case, I am going to find Halav and punch him in the nuts," Ivan said.
"So what's Karameikos like this time of year?" Applejack asked. I could tell she was trying to cheer him up. I'll talk to him later.
I suddenly realized Rarity was watching me read for some reason. "How are you, Rarity?" I asked.
"Greatly enjoying myself, darling Marcus," she said with that wonderful voice of hers. "This hat is a marvel."
I smiled. "I know it is."
Twilight nudged me. "Go talk to Rarity," she said. "I'll hold down the book fort."
"You made me disassemble the book fort," Spike grumbled.
I laughed softly. "Was it mighty and strong?"
"It was awesome."
"It was made of all the books on farming, just when Applejack had to come get some," Twilight said. "Anyway, Spike, you can come help me."
"But..."
"Come help me," she said firmly and he grumbled and came over, though I noticed he soon was content with assisting her.
Rarity and I chatted about places we'd been and she told me about Ponyville and more about her family. It was a strangely... not the sort of thing I normally chat about in dungeons. But relaxing.
Then she stood up, which put her head above mine. She looked slightly frustrated, so I got on my knees, which put us roughly level, then looked at her quizzically. She looked around, then whispered in my ear, "What do you know about this Erik, who Twilight had a thing for? That was him in the flashback, right?"
"I don't know any more than you do," I lied. I lied SO MUCH. "Maybe less if you talked to Dona Carlotta, who I think was his girlfriend at some point."
"He cast her as his character's wife in the song," she whispered to me.
OH FUCK ME.
I just picked Twilight because Inga was about as close as a Northwoman gets to being Twilight. But since I was Ottar...
AND she already was thinking about the logistics of dating a human by that point.
Given Celestia's ancestry, she may well have been thinking 'let's see if Twilight falls in love with someone who will get her to go out and make some friends' when she introduced me to her.
"I couldn't figure out if that was deliberate or not," Rarity whispered to me.
ACCIDENT.
"Given he didn't plan that ahead of time, I have to assume that it was an accident, whatever he might have thought in his head," I whispered to her, feeling VERY nervous.
"I was also surprised to see Lyra was there, though I admit I don't know her well," Rarity said. "I knew she was into mares, as she's seeing Bon-Bon. Who you wouldn't know either."
"Some sort of candymaking pony?" I guessed.
"She's from the Province of Prance, yes," Rarity whispered, smiling a little. "She's a candymaker, but she makes her living as one of the ponies who maintains the town's plants," she continued. "Anyway, Lyra..." Rarity searched for words.
"Is very interested in humans?" I said.
"Not romantically... I think...," Rarity said very hesitantly, seeming quite nervous. "But in terms of... culture, history, how they move... Lyra actually uses chairs."
I fought the urge to laugh. "I suppose those benches were for sitting the way you were a minute ago?"
"Yes," she said. "But Lyra sits on them like a human." She was definitely nervous.
How exactly Lyra can do this, I don't know. Ponies don't have the right structure for it, really.
"I got the impression he taught about humans at the school," I told her. I prayed I sounded as calm and looked as calm as I think I do, as I was busy flipping out on the inside. "Which I guess is why he wrote a song about trade routes."
"He seemed far too comfortable with Ponies to run away though," Rarity whispered hesitantly to me. "If he didn't like her romantically, couldn't he have just turned her down? The fact that he ran away when she kissed him makes me think there must have been more to it." She looked thoughtful. "Though Twilight thinks he was afraid that Celestia would get angry and do something terrible to him."
That was among my reasons for fleeing like a screaming maniac, yes. Being drunk pretty much meant all my fears came out and once I had run, I was even more worried about being killed.
It seemed too late to turn back.
In retrospect, if Celestia had really wanted to catch me, I don't think I could have escaped. I'm not sure why she didn't stop me, but Canterlot is deep into Equestria. If she'd wanted a manhunt, I couldn't have made it out of the country.
Mind you, she may have thought I'd go get myself killed and that would be punishment enough. I've certainly... possibly died and reincarnated...
"What exactly did happen?" I asked. If I am not careful, I will show off I know too much.
"I don't know the details, but they got drunk for some reason and she more or less came onto him and he ran way," she said very softly.
I was totally blind and it came out of nowhere for me and I totally panicked. Magnified by being drunk myself.
"I don't think she's normally into humans, as I've seen her staring at stallions some times that she didn't think anyone would notice," Rarity continued.
I suppose from her point of view, though, I was pretty much exactly what she wanted except for being a human. I thought about her comment about how the four of us working on things together in the tent reminded her of being with her parents.
"Are there a lot of unmarried stallions your age in Ponyville?" I asked.
"No, there's a strong tendency for them to either get married and go into business or farming or else to leave town to seek their fortune elsewhere. There's a lot more mares our age than stallions," Rarity said. "And there's a definite dearth of the kind of intellectual I think Twilight wants, though it doesn't stop her finding some men physically attractive, I suspect." Her voice was oddly satisfied about that.
"I suppose Applejack or Big Macintosh will need to marry someone to carry on the family farm," I told her. "Or both. Who actually owns it?"
"Granny Smith owns it but Applejack is the heir," Rarity said, then sighed. "I tried setting up Fluttershy and Big Macintosh one time, but all they did was stare at each other, then Fluttershy panicked and ran away." She sighed dramatically, putting a hoof to her forehead, and I laughed gently.
"He's the shy type too?" I asked.
"Not so much shy as quiet. Uses the fewest words possible," Rarity said. "But he is kind and gentle like Fluttershy. And likes animals." She looked thoughtful. "I should have arranged a picnic, perhaps." She shook her head.
"Fluttershy strikes me as someone who would need a lively boyfriend," I told Rarity. "Like a male version of Rainbow Dash or Applejack. Who would pull her out of her shell. And whose most overactive tendencies she could moderate."
"So you think opposites attract?" Rarity asked me.
"You need common interests or else there is nothing once the physical rush wears off," I told her. "But I... well, I may be projecting."
"Project away," she said to me.
"My experience is that people who are very good at something are attractive and people also like those who have qualities they admire but don't have themselves. But that may just be me universalizing my own preferences," I told her.
Rarity smiled at that, looking pleased. "Flatterer," she said.
"I speak only the truth," I told her. "I'm surprised you don't have stallions all over you." I paused. "Figuratively speaking."
"Oh, I have a fair number of gentleman admirers," she said, smiling even more. I can tell she enjoys that. "I just..." She sighed, then stared at the ground.
"You don't have to talk about it," I whispered. I don't want to make her uncomfortable.
"It is a little too easy to become intoxicated by your own good looks," she said softly. "I very much had this dream of fairytale romance with a prince."
I thought about Dona Carlotta and I. "Doesn't everyone?" I told her softly.
She stared into my eyes. Then her gaze softened. "Well, you know enough to put the pieces together," she said, turning and studying my shoulder.
I scritched her behind the ears, hoping Ponies like it as much as dogs and cats do. Her happy noise made it clear this was so. "I understand," I told her. "Fairy tales gloss over all the difficulties and the realities of it all. Ivan would probably laugh at you, given what he said, but I won't. I would expect there are Pony princes less wretched than Blueblood, though."
"I've tried to focus on my work," she said, still talking to my shoulder, though she looked happier now.
I suddenly felt this death stare of doom. Like someone was trying to destroy my head with their eyes.
Hi, Spike.
I can tell Rarity likes Spike, but doesn't 'like' Spike, if you know what I mean.
My first crush didn't like me either, but at least Rarity is unlikely to soak Spike's underwear in poison ivy. There was a TON of it near where I grew...
Dammit, my brain is trying to tell me I used to be an Elf again.
Though if I was reincarnated from being Dmitri...
"Marcus?" she said softly, worried. Then she super-whispered, "Spitfire is staring at us for some reason."
She'd been eying me that other time, too. I don't get it.
Unless she suspects I am Erik, which is certainly possible and likely means my life will be very short.
"Probably just bored, since Soarin' is busy flirting with Rainbow Dash," I said softly to Rarity.
She nodded, then yawned. "I think I had better sleep."
"Me too," I told her, yawning.
She got us each a pillow and we laid down on the stone floor as best we could, then threw a blanket over us and tried to sleep, which wasn't easy as in the next room, several tanks worth of giant crabs kept clicking their claws ALL THE TIME.
But eventually, I passed out.
*************
I awoke from dreams of Celestia riding on Rarity's father trying to find me to kill me, when I heard footsteps near me. Only Spike can make actual footsteps or Ivan, but I could see Applejack, Ivan, and Soarin' at the door, keeping watch with a light spell in a box. Basically, you aim the open top the way you want the light to go, namely the door.
Enough of it reflected that I could see Spike had a top hat and a cape and a suit on, and was stalking towards me, vampire style, cape in front of his face, revealing only his eyes. And his stylish hat. He had something hidden behind the cape, so I let him get close to me. He kneeled down and produced a glass of water. ...
Then he began to slowly drag my hand towards it, glancing at the guards, who were oblivious to him and looked bored out of their skulls.
Oh, THAT trick. I assumed he was going to throw water on my face or something.
I turned, curling up facing the other way, forcing him to circle me. Then I rolled over, so he had to circle me AGAIN.
Pinkie's tail began twitching in her sleep.
This time, I cast a little spell and yanked his hat. He stumbled over me and... he's heavier than I thought. I oofed as he knocked the air out of me. The cup went flying and landed on Pinkie, waking her up with a wet face.
She began laughing as she wiped her face, while Rarity now started awake. The rest of the group now turned around and Applejack said, "Spike, what in tarnation are you doing?"
Spike mumbled incoherently.
I helped him up. "Better watch out when you walk around in a dark room," I told him.
Spike mumbled incoherently again.
"Go to sleep, Spike," Twilight mumbled. "I can sing you a lullaby if you need one."
"I don't need a lullaby!" he said, storming back over to Twilight while Pinkie cheerfully washed her face.
"Thanks for including me!" she said cheerfully.
Then we all got back to sleep.
*************** |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book Three (White Plume Mountain): Part 2: Altar of the Lupine Lords | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 3: White Plume Mountain
Part 2: Altar of the Lupine Lords
By John Biles
***************
Eventually, we dragged ourselves out of bed so we could try the second section of the dungeon. We circled back to the Sphinx with some effort, then took the 'moon' route'. It began with a long hallway which showed the night sky. Twilight was pleased by its accuracy. There was a pit trap; Ivan was about to disarm it when Clarity said over the... whatever it is... "Oh, Rainbow Dash, clock's ticking. Four minutes flat, right?"
"Hah! THREE AND A HALF! CHARGE!" Rainbow Dash took off at high speed, while Ivan worked with me assisting.
"No, Dash, wait!" Twilight said.
The Wonderbolts took off after her and we heard distant shouting and smashing noises.
Once the pit was disarmed, we pursued them, but the hallway turned and we went through some doors into howling winds. We could hear them off beyond more doors, but the winds blew us all back.
And over it all, Clarity kept up a running countdown, second by second, which I found REALLY annoying.
"Okay, this time I will push forward and open the doors at the far end of the wind tunnel," Applejack said.
"There has to be something to shut the winds off," Ivan said. "But I can't get to it like this."
"I'm going to enlarge both of you," Twilight said. "Applejack can keep Ivan steady and he can disarm it."
We couldn't even watch them go in, just listen, while Clarity continued her countdown with Spikey. Thrashing noises slowly got more distant and I could hear every heavy step of Applejack and her grunty noises. Ivan kept mumbling and cursing and I felt my hair try to blow from the air spilling out.
And Spike kept glaring at me.
I'm sorry, Spike, I don't like hurting your feelings.
Okay, I enjoyed pulling the hat over your eyes WAY too much, but other than that, I'm sorry.
It's pretty clear that Rarity must know unless she's blind, and he's not what she's looking for. Sorry, man, happens to all of us.
You're going to outlive us all, anyway.
Except maybe me if I keep somehow dying and coming back to life and not getting older.
Worry later.
The winds finally stopped and we rushed down to where Applejack and Ivan were. Applejack broke down the next set of doors and what we saw beyond them was a long tunnel of silvery metal. It was round and had a round door at the end with a... one of those doors where you turn a wheel to open it.
"It's a trap," Ivan said. "I don't know what, but I instinctively distrust it.
"One minute," Clarity said cheerfully. "Looks like your time is running out, Dashie."
"She's not in this room, you know," Applejack pointed out.
"Yes, but everyone needs to know when she LOSES," Rainbow Crash said cheerfully.
Very softly, we heard Rainbow Dash shout "BITE ME, CRASH."
I think we heard them hearing her. So to speak.
"Maybe I can fly down and open the doors without setting the trap off?" Fluttershy said.
"It's worth trying if you think you can get that open," Twilight said.
Fluttershy nodded, took a deep breath and... very slowly flew down the hallway.
By the time she reached the end, we could hear our evil twins all laughing and mocking Rainbow Dash for being out of time. Applejack scowled. "You shouldn't make fun of her for doin' her best."
"Her best ain't half good enough," Rainbow Crash said. "By the way, Fluttershy, you're not strong enough to open that door."
This proved correct; she strained and made very oddly delicate grunting noises but couldn't open it.
"I'll help," Applejack said, but Twilight stopped her.
"Pinkie, use your Spider-Pinkie boots and go help her." Twilight said.
Rarity now touched her hat, looking thoughtful.
"Oke doke Loki!" Pinkie said, donning the boots and walking along the wall down to Fluttershy.
Loki? She casually invokes LOKI? Okay, he probably is Celestia's father, but...
Spike, Rarity, myself, and Twilight all got wide eyes. We felt something. Surely Loki hadn't noticed.
"Who has the best ears?" I asked.
"Well, I have the prettiest ears, darling," Rarity said.
Twilight laughed softly. "That would be Spike."
"Can you put your ear to the wall, see if you hear anything?" I said.
Spike did so. "I got nothing. Other than echoes of Pinkie feet."
The trigger must be on the floor. Ivan and I began studying it as Pinkie joined them. Twilight and Rarity also tried to lend help in turning the door.
"Pinkie, can you see any holes in the wall by where you are?"
"Yes, there's tubes going into the wall," she said.
Spouts which fire off something.
Wait, this is the pegasus route... we think... You'd want something triggered by a flying creature, right? No point in floor triggers but Fluttershy didn't set it off...
We couldn't hear Dash or the Wonderbolts, which worried me. Dammit, Dash, you'd better be okay. Don't make me have spent all this time getting on your good side for nothing!
Pinkie started singing as she and Fluttershy tried to turn the wheel.
o/~ Pinkie and Fluttershy,
o/~ Pinkie and Fluttershy,
o/~ Wheel of time keeps on turning,
o/~ Turning the wheel of... the hallway...
Pinkie sighed. "I need inspiration." ...
Fluttershy tried singing.
o/~ Pinkie and Fluttershy,
o/~ Pinkie and Fluttershy,
o/~ Fluttershy wants to be a tree,
o/~ Pinkie is a she...
She paused. "Wait, what are we sinking about?"
"Turning this wheel," Pinkie said. "Marcus, sing something!"
Sing WHAT? What good will this do?
o/~ Boldly stood Halav when came the dawn,
o/~ Cunningly concealed, Zirchev lay in wait,
o/~ Atop the hill, Petra prayed for those she loved,
o/~ For the day of doom long feared had come.
Ivan grimaced. Sorry, Ivan, I don't know, it was just the first thing that came to mind.
Fluttershy and Pinkie continued to try to shove the wheel along as it ground slowly, ever so slowly and they both began to sweat, while Applejack rocked back and forth restlessly on her hooves.
o/~ Come my foes, Halav shouted as they came
o/~ Ere comes the twilight, all shall fall
o/~ Who would feign right to pass into our lands!
o/~ All the invaders shall perish by my own hands!
Pinkie began to make really loud groaning noises and I wondered how exactly the pegasi had gotten this door open if it was so stuck. Sweat poured down her and Fluttershy's bodies and Applejack became more agitated.
"There has got to be some way to safely get me down there to help," Applejack said.
"Earth...pony...power..." Pinkie grunted out.
This didn't do much.
Twilight, however, sang the next verse of the Song of Halav. Spike began frantically digging through Twilight's saddlebags as she sang.
o/~ Come my forest allies, Zirchev sang that day,
o/~ Come satyr and dryad and cheval and pegasi
o/~ Come elven friends from your deep forests
o/~ Come stand with men until dawn comes again.
Spike now fell into the saddlebag with a yelp, vanishing from sight.
I winced in sympathy.
Fluttershy was vibrating and sweating. Pinkie... I could hear her muscles working and the wheel turned more. "Cookie, cookie, cookie, cookie," Pinkie began to chant determinedly.
"Dammit, dammit, dammit," Applejack began to mutter like a mantra.
Twilight now looked urgently at Rarity, who started.
"Darling, I don't even know this song," Rarity said to Twilight.
Twilight stared at her, horn glowing, and Rarity began hesitantly to sing, her voice wobbling a little.
o/~ Assemble the bandages and pile the herbs, Petra sang.
o/~ All things which heal and help are mine to command.
o/~ Ladies of Traladara, rally around me!
o/~ We too shall fight to defend our land.
Twilight smiled brightly for some reason and Ivan sighed, but he and Spike sang together now. Spike, I will note, was a better singer.
o/~ And the men sang and raised their spears together.
o/~ Come our foes, you will find us no easy meat!
o/~ Come our foes, my spear hungers for your blood!
o/~ Come our foes, the deeds we do will live on forever!
Pinkie gave a great shout and suddenly the wheel spun freely, pulling her along with it because she was operating it with her magically sticky boots. "WOOHOO!!!!" she shouted as Fluttershy fell back. "The deeds I do will live on forever!"
I wobbled, dizzy from looking at her.
Pinkie stumbled away from the wheel, then fell down. "Eeeeeee!" She sounded happy about it, though.
The door came open and immediately the hallway began to spin.
DAMMIT.
The tubes began spewing a clear liquid everywhere, all over Pinkie and Fluttershy. Pinkie tried to stand, slipped on the liquid, then went rolling around wildly. "Yes, slip and slide!"
Rarity concentrated, firing arrows down the hallway. Each plugged a dispenser, but the far end of the cylinder, Pinkie, and Fluttershy were now thoroughly greased. I was amazed she'd been able to hit the rotating targets.
"It's not so hard since the cylinder rotated at a regular speed once up to full," Rarity told me when I asked. "I just predicted it and then shot."
Twilight now concentrated and the cylinder began to slow down. The dispensers struggled but couldn't expel Rarity's arrows. Fluttershy fled towards us, making unhappy noises. Pinkie continued to slide around, laughing loudly and clearly totally enjoying her ride.
"You're not supposed to LIKE IT," Rainbow Crash said, sounding frustrated.
"And they're not on fire," Not-Spitfire said. She sounded disappointed. "I like fire."
"Everyone likes fire," Rainbow Crash said.
"Fire scares me," Fluttershy said.
"It's okay, you can be my minion anyway," not-Fluttershy said kindly.
Except for using the word 'minion', she sounded like Fluttershy, just slightly louder.
"My trap is much better than this silly machine," not-Fluttershy continued.
Crunch, tear, grimace, crunch, shake, bend. Mechanisms ripped and tore and destroyed themselves and the tunnel stopped spending, only now it was kind of bent and twisted and the end of it no longer lined up with the doorway to the next room, which was going to be problematic.
"That was AWESOME but now I am slimy," Pinkie said. "Rarity, help!"
"Me too," Fluttershy asked softly.
Spike and Rarity tried to clean them off while Applejack, Ivan, Twilight, and I tore open the metal wall with magic, blade and kicking very hard, in order to open the way to the next room; Rarity then recovered her arrows; it turned out they'd also blocked the fire that was going to ignite the grease. Ack, that's vicious.
Man, I hope the pegasi are okay because at this rate, they'll die of old age before we catch up to them.
*************
A short hallway led out onto a platform; the room was huge, and I guessed it had to be some kind of pocket dimension because it couldn't be inside a volcano. There was mist down below and huge trees grew up out of it, with large gaps between them. Coconuts hung from the trees and dozens of monkeys roamed around, swinging tree to tree with vines and beating their chests. Far off, you could barely make out another platform leading into a hallway.
"This is so pretty," Fluttershy said, then rubbed herself against the wall of the room, trying to get the last of the oil off.
"Okay, this is gonna take a mite of thinkin'," Applejack said, staring at it all.
"If we can reach that first tree, I think we can swing with vines," I said.
"Ponies ain't so great at clinging to vines," Applejack said. "I could probably jump tree to tree, but I don't think the rest of you can, though Fluttershy can fly."
"I can give someone wings," Twilight said, huffing and puffing from her earlier display of magic.
"I have the fly spell saved," I told her. "Maybe we should use that, as we need you to not be wiped out."
"Twilight, if you make me bigger, I can take Ivan and Marcus to the first tree, then they can go and I can start hauling ponies," Applejack said.
"What about me?" Spike said.
"You... okay, yer not a pony, but when I say 'ponies', I mean you too, Spike."
Spike smiled at that.
"If Spike rides in Rarity's saddlebag, you can take him and Rarity at the same time," I said. Here's my makeup present to you, Spike.
His eyes lit up. "Yes!"
"Hop in," Rarity said kindly and he clambered in. "You too, Marcus. Ivan can ride in Applejack's saddlebags."
"I can teleport," Twilight said. "I will teleport myself and Pinkie. Then Applejack can carry everyone else at once. And Fluttershy can fly." She enlarged Applejack, then we helped Rarity up to 'ride' on Applejack and then everyone got stowed.
Fluttershy began flying and Applejack leaped to the first tree. Immediately, the monkeys began pelting her with coconuts, while Fluttershy begged them to stop. Applejack was too busy dodging to make any headway and I started to feel a little motion sickness.
Rarity said, "Assist me, Marcus." She threw up several sheets of cloth and together, we used it as a shield to cover Applejack's advance.
Fluttershy began to sing and the trees came to life; we could hear not-Fluttershy also singing, trying to command the trees, but the trees ignored her.
"Trees, I am a grand druid! You have to do what Mommy wants!" Not-Fluttershy said, frustrated.
Keraptis said something I couldn't quite make out.
"I am not cheating! I am a druid, Mommy Nature gave me this power to be everyone's loving mother!" Not-Fluttershy said.
"I'm sorry, monkeys, but I can't let you hurt my friend Applejack," Fluttershy said apologetically as the trees began snaring the monkeys. "I promise you won't get hurt. If you're nice, I'll give you some bananas."
Several monkeys now defected when bribed properly, and began chasing off the other monkeys.
"Even a loving mother sometimes has to chastise the bad children!" Not-Fluttershy said vigorously. Shouting for her was about like trying to talk over a crowd for me.
Applejack continued to jump lithely from branch to branch, though I noticed the branches often broke when she jumped off them. This may make getting back harder than getting in.
We finally passed to the other side with not-Fluttershy continuing to gently freak out. Then we fled the room, though I got hit with a coconut in the back of the head on my way out. Oww.
*****************
We opened the next door and arctic winds rushed in, chilling us. The room beyond was terraced with ledges climbing upwards and forwards to a distant door, but snow and ice were everywhere and howling winds poured down.
"There may be ice monsters," I said.
Ivan shivered. "I may die by the time I reach the other side.
I put on my sweatervest. Rarity sighed. "I'm sorry, everyone, I just have some scarves."
Twilight summoned enough sweatervests for everyone and we wrapped up making blankets into ponchos as best we could. Fluttershy and Twilight and I also cast warming spells, enough that we'd all only get somewhat cold instead of dying horribly.
"Oh, those naughty pegasi could have fixed the weather," Not-Fluttershy said mournfully. "But they wanted candy before their meal and so they just rushed through and left you all to suffer. But if you all repent and obey me, I can protect you."
"No," Applejack said. "I only obey the Princesses."
Not-Fluttershy made an angry noise.
"I only obey Twilight, and only because I WANT to." Spike said. "And Rarity. And Celestia. And Luna. But NOT Owlicious or Marcus or especially not that bastard Erik."
We all made our statements of 'no luck for you."
That's when it started to thunder and freezing rain began falling.
Oh fuck me.
"Here, let me help," Rainbow Crash said.
"And me," Not-Soarin' said.
"And me," Not-Spitfire said.
Oh INFINITE FUCK ME!!!!!
We were up onto tier two of ten and now we were soaked to the bone. It was especially hideous for Ivan and I, as we didn't have nice warm coats. Spike kept breathing fire on himself to get the ice off.
"Fluttershy, can you break up the clouds?" Ivan asked.
"No, I didn't study weather control, I'm good with animals and plants, of which there aren't any here," Fluttershy said, shivering. She glowed with warmth and we tried to stay near her, though all she could do was make us miserable and not dead.
Then the lightning strikes started.
Fluttershy narrowly dodged one and Ivan and I put our weapons in Twilight's saddlebags, so they couldn't draw lightning. Thank the Immortals I wear leather armor.
Spike kept melting ice to help us go forward, though it refroze quickly. We slogged along slowly, miserably, shivering, while Fluttershy got more and more worried and cold, with the rest of us.
"I would say to huddle for warmth, but we can't huddle and move at once," I said.
"I'm sorry," Fluttershy said, sounding guilty. "I'm a lousy pegasus."
"You've been a huge help so far," I told her. "And our weather experts decided to race off without us to win a bet."
"And lost it!" Clarity cackled, laughing.
Applejack suddenly looked at me thoughtfully, then frowned and pressed forward, clearly not happy about something.
I don't get it.
"Something wrong, Applejack?" I asked.
"Later," she said. "Got reminded of something."
That probably bodes ill.
Clarity began singing a song about winning.
You know, mad wizards usually have the decency to keep their mouth shut while they watch you. This is starting to drive me crazy.
Rarity slipped and began slide back down to the previous tier. I turned and caught her, then began to slide myself. Ivan caught me and Applejack him and pulled us up.
"So cold," Rarity said, shivering. "I don't even have any boots."
"It is a mite cold," Applejack said, shivering.
An idea hit me. "Spike, you should ride on Twilight, leaning down to embrace her neck. It will give her some body warmth."
"I'm fine, you should help Rarity, Spike," Twilight said.
Fluttershy was becoming very agitated and kept flitting around, pushing against us to help warm us.
Pinkie said, "Can't remember... taste of pie..."
"Oh come on," Ivan said. "I can still remember the taste of pie, I just can't feel my tongue." He slogged forward, though the winds howled and sometimes we had to try to dodge lightning.
I helped Spike onto Rarity and she now began to press forward a little faster, her heat helping him out. He smiled brightly despite the cold.
Halfway up. UGH.
Fluttershy now pressed against me and I put my hand on her back, trying to soak up warmth. She was so nice and warm.
"Stupidly cold," Ivan mumbled.
"At least my hat is keeping my head warm," I said.
"And my ha..." Rarity winced. She concentrated, wham instant winter clothing. "I wish I could share these," she said apologetically.
Okay, VERY JEALOUS.
"Are you all done being bad children or is Mommy going to have to keep punishing you?" Not-Fluttershy said sweetly.
"You're the bad child," Fluttershy said. "You're hurting my friends!" She was quivering with anger. "They can't handle this weather!"
"Then they should either turn back or else submit to me. I promise to be a kind and gentle mother," Not-Fluttershy said sweetly. "But bad children must be PUNISHED."
"What is your Element?" I asked.
"I am Dragonfly, the Power of Mother Nature," not-Fluttershy said. "Who loves good children and destroys the bad."
"No good mother destroys her children," Fluttershy protested. "You need to stop doing this!"
"All you have to do is promise to obey your mother," Dragonfly said sweetly.
"No," Ivan said sharply. "I'd rather die."
"That can be arranged, dearie," Dragonfly said sweetly, making me shiver.
The cold was getting worth. We were shivering, even the ponies. Only my torso had any real warmth. Fluttershy was doing her best and Twilight's spell helped but it was cold, so cold...
I'm not sure why it was hitting Pinkie the hardest but she was raving about needing shortening and telling imaginary people to save themselves. "Run, Madame LaFlour, RUN!" she shouted.
Fluttershy pushed against her, trying to warm her up and Pinkie began talking to Fluttershy's shoulder about how gentle Mr. Turnip was.
She... I hope she's just faking madness.
I'm not sure how I would tell.
Rarity wobbled and Spike said, "Hold on Rarity, you can do it." He spat fire nearby, trying to warm her indirectly.
Applejack grimly slogged forwards. But even she was having a very hard time of it.
My feet slipped and I fell down. OWW. For a few seconds, I just laid there, but then Fluttershy pulled me up. "Don't give up," she said urgently.
Maybe I'm going to find out if I really do return from the grave. Whatever is happening to me.
Dammit.
Though at least this means Princess Carnelia doesn't get the satisfaction of killing me.
I don't want to freeze to death, dammit.
I think I tried to cry but my tears froze.
"So tired," Twilight mumbled, fell down in the snow, then struggled to her feet. "I want to sleep."
"All you have to do is surrender to me," Dragonfly said sweetly.
"Stop hurting them," Fluttershy said urgently, sounding desperate.
"Give her the Stare," Applejack mumbled.
"I can't see her! And it won't work on the storm!"
And then Rainbow Crash and the other two pegasi started laughing and laughing and laughing.
"Where the hell is Rainbow Dash, anyway?" I said, suddenly wondering.
"They're a little tied up," Rainbow Crash said, then began laughing more. "Since Fluttershy let them go ahead without her and they ran right into a trap meant for her, not that she can get you out of this one."
Fluttershy began to cry tears of frustration and looked guilty. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
"Easy for you to say when you're hiding in the control room like a coward," Ivan shouted angrily at them. "I bet you wouldn't last five seconds in this cold, Crash!"
"Yeah, you're all talk and no flying," Applejack said angrily.
"You big mouth!"
"You're nothing but an empty shell full of HOT AIR," Twilight shouted.
Oh yeah. "My hoard's bigger than yours!" Spike shouted.
"You have all the fashion sense of a herd of blind goats!" Rarity shouted.
Oooh, I like that one.
"You're a big meanie!" Fluttershy tried to shout.
Rarity now whispered to Spike, who dismounted. She now turned into Rainbow Crash and flung herself into a snowbank. "Look at me, I'm Rainbow Crash, the clumsiest pegasus in Equestria!"
"I am not CLUMSY!" Rainbow Crash shouted.
"I would kiss my boyfriend but I keep missing his lips!" Rarity now crashed into another snowbank.
There was a sudden wave of heat across the room, though it quickly faded.
"No, you're interfering with my storm of ice and snow!" Dragonfly said urgently. "Bad girl!"
"Rainbow Crash, hitting trees at the speed of LIGHT!" I shouted.
Rarity made groggy, out of control noises and 'crashed' again'.
"That's it, I'm gonna go KICK THAT FAKE'S ASS!" Rainbow Crash shouted.
Chaos ensued in the control room as some of her friends tried to restrain her.
Rarity turned back to normal, and now shivered even more intensely. "So cold."
"I'm going to have to use a lot of power but we can't take any more of this," Twilight said, shivering herself.
Spike and I both pressed against Rarity, trying to warm her. "You were great," Spike told her.
"I totally agree," I told her.
"I'll do it," Fluttershy said determinedly to Twilight. "Save your strength. I'm not much of a weather pony, but I'll do it." She straightened her necklace, and then she flew up into the storm and began to sing.
We all did our best to sing along, though it was hard to hear her. You could still hear fighting at their end, and now you could see a glow in the clouds and then the glow ripped through them, melting them, and they turned to rain and poured down and now Fluttershy shone like the sun, invoking the first dawn at the beginning of days. The warmth of her kindness melted the ice and the water flowed down the tiers, leaving them bare and the cold broke and fled.
Warmth, blessed gentle warmth that soaked into us, like the return of a long lost friend.
Her element shone like the sun and she guided us to finally escape that damn room.
Fluttershy, you are the best pony.
************
"I feel bad for making fun of Rainbow Crash," Fluttershy confessed as we headed down the next tunnel.
I didn't. They're trying to kill us or drive us away. All we did was mock.
"It was somewhat gauche, but I had to do something," Rarity said. "Marcus, I need your body heat." She shivered a little.
I came and put a hand on her back; I couldn't do a lot more due to the need to keep moving. She did feel cold.
The next door had a faint shimmering, and beyond, something like a night sky and a grey, dusty landscape. "The moon!" Twilight said, amazed.
We stepped through and... the air felt weird. I wasn't dying of lack of air but it almost felt like there was no air. Somehow.
The room was huge, pitted with craters. I turned to the others. I tried to say, 'I think the air is enchanted' but no sound came out.
Everything was utterly silent and eerie.
Maybe there is no air but the void is enchanted so you don't die?
Ironically, a group of snow monsters were trapped near the entrance by a bunch of metal rope traps. They must have chased Dash and company in here.
Twilight wrote a note with her powers. 'This is like the moon. But apparently we can breathe.'
The stars glittered overhead and we could see Mystara in the sky. Cool.
Ivan identified the next set of rope traps, but then we got to another set, where Dash and company were bound up.
Dash began struggling and mouthing words at us, but we couldn't figure out what she and the other two meant.
I immediately turned around on the principle 'they're always RIGHT BEHIND YOU.'
I WAS RIGHT!
Huge humanoid monsters, made of moon rocks, were looming at us from behind, having silently followed us over.
One of them loomed at Rarity, who like the others, had not turned around. I instinctively lunged at him and struck him with my sword, cutting out a chunk of his chest.
He then knocked me for a loop and I flew over the others, dropping my sword and crashing into some rocks. OWWW. This is why being a hero is STUPID.
But at least she didn't get maimed by a surprise attack. I was ready for it.
Sort of.
OWWWWW.
Rarity popped out four arrows and angrily fired; the arrows struck and veins of crystal now formed inside it, tearing it apart as they grew. Applejack turned, charged another and kicked it down and began jumping on it, trying to force it into submission.
Twilight tried some sort of spell and nothing happened. Spike tried to breathe fire. No fire.
Then they both got punted over by me and now metal ropes erupted up, tangling us all up.
Pinkie jumped away from her foe, letting him step on two pies. The plates stuck on his feet and he began to slip and slide until he fell down and she then poured jelly on his hands, making it hard for him to get a grip to push himself up.
Fluttershy began trying to get Rainbow Dash, Spitfire, and Soarin' free, but she couldn't untangle the ropes.
I began reaching for my sword; it slowly slid towards me, and... where was Ivan?
Ivan suddenly rose up behind the one which had attacked Twilight and struck it in the back, hitting what must have been a vital point as its torso shattered and then Pinkie kicked its bits into a crater.
Twilight glanced at me and yanked with her powers and my sword flew to me. I began cutting us loose.
Magic swords for the win!
The one which Pinkie had mauled now got shot by Rarity and broken apart and the one Applejack was beating on surrendered; she herded it into one of the many rope traps to tie it up.
I managed to cut everyone loose but now more rock monsters were forming. Rarity looked at me, worried, but I tried to look reassuring, though I now ached all over.
Rainbow Dash scribbled in the loose lunar sand with her hoof even as Twilight hurled lighting balls at the next rock monster to form, shattering it. 'Door, ceiling, square star thing, pole star'.
Fluttershy now nuzzled me and tried to sing a song but nothing happened. She looked frustrated, but I patted her back, appreciating the effort.
Twilight looked up and pointed to the Haywain, which does include the pole star.
Rainbow Dash flapped, jumped, showed she couldn't fly.
Man, this would be ugly for pegasi.
Ivan drew an arrow in the dust with a rope tied to it. Another rock monster began to rise and Applejack started fighting it with Pinkie's help.
He then drew a stick figure human hanging from the rope, with little arrows to indicate climbing.
She nodded and we got rope and an arrow and she shot it deep into the ceiling. He then borrowed Pinkie's boots, fitting them on hands and feet as best he could and climbed the rope, then jimmied the lock at the top.
The door flew open and air exploded into the room in a howling wind. Ivan plummeted, but as he fell, Applejack ran and leaped up to meet him. They tangled together in the air but it stopped him just enough for Dash, Spitfire and Soarin' to now roar into action against the wind and catch them, though all five landed in a heap together.
"Thank you, everyone," Ivan said.
"Earth ponies forever," Applejack mumbled and they both laughed.
We had to blow up a few more rock monsters and Twilight mumbled about being exiled to the moon, but then the pegasi got us flown up to the next room. It turned out to be empty, so we all flopped down and rested and Fluttershy and Pinkie treated everyone.
"Marcus, that was very brave of you," Rarity said, sounding guilty.
I think I had a fit of insanity, or maybe too much curiosity about whether I can somehow recover from death. But I know how to not express that. "A gentleman cannot allow a lady to come to harm," I told her. Then I grimaced and Fluttershy flinched. "No, no, it wasn't you," I lied to her. "Just other aches and pains."
O/~ Earth ponies forever...
Pinkie trailed off as she worked on Ivan and Applejack. "Umm... hmm, going to have to think on our theme song," she said.
Ivan said, "Well, something... picking locks doesn't go so well with baking pies and bucking apples."
"You can be the one who EATS the pies," Pinkie said, drooling a little.
Rarity fussed over me; it was rather pleasant. I enjoy being fussed over; it shows people care. She started to say something, then looked around and fell silent.
"You can just pretend I'm a tree," Fluttershy whispered, then giggled.
I laughed softly. Rarity now tried to strike a pose like a tree and we all laughed. Pinkie's ears twitched and she turned but Rarity had settled back down.
"I wish so much this place had a bath," I said.
"You and I both," Rarity said.
We chatted and I tried to ignore my pain, though now it faded away.
As I said, magical healing is the BEST healing.
**************
"Right, right, no racing off ahead," Rainbow Dash said ruefully.
"Someone lost the bet," Clarity said with a sing-song voice.
"Shut up," Rainbow Dash grumbled.
"You can tell her to shut up when you get some common sense," Spitfire said irritably.
"Hey, you came too," Rainbow Dash protested.
"Because I had to keep YOU alive," Spitfire said, pointing a hoof at Dash.
"I w...," Soarin' began.
"You stay out of this," Spitfire said. "Dash, if you ever want to be a Wonderbolt, you're going to have to learn some self-control! We have to do what Celestia tells us and we have to follow Blue Angel's orders. And that usually means having a plan and following it, not making bets with the enemy and rushing off like a coconut flung by a monkey!"
Exactly. That's how you end up with your head shaved and your pants on fire, otherwise.
I liked those pants, dammit.
"Spitfire's right," Rarity said.
"I have this," Spitfire said firmly to Rarity, who looked somewhat taken aback.
I blinked in surprise. Is there something I'm not seeing?
"I...uh... I can take orders!" Rainbow Dash protested.
"Uh huh," Spitfire said dubiously.
"I can!"
"Fine. Soarin', you're Dash's commander until we finish this. You do what Soarin' says and we'll see if you can take orders," Spitfire said, then elbowed Soarin'.
"I...uh... right." Soarin' saluted Dash, who saluted back.
"Umm... follow me," Soarin' said, and Dash grinned.
"I'm on it!"
Definitely missing something here.
*************
We ate lunch and then got in motion again, though Rarity sent Sweetie Belle a letter before we went. I don't know what she wrote; I had spent the time watching Soarin' give silly orders to Rainbow Dash. I couldn't tell if Spitfire was happy with this or not.
The wind tunnel we had to climb and/or fly up was relatively easy to deal with despite the high winds, with everyone working together. I have to say this group is pretty smooth compared to some groups I've adventured with. Though the Blue Eagles...
Someone sent us to get this sword. I'm not sure who. Minroth himself? Why did I keep it?
Dammit.
The next room was, of course, a giant chessboard. Which means chess puzzles. A theme MUCH overused by mad wizards.
Then we all got teleported onto the board, EXCEPT Soarin'. Damn you for liking chess puzzles!!!!
I was the White King and Rarity the White Queen, with Twilight as the Queen's Bishop, Rainbow Dash as the Queen's Knight, and Pinkie as the White Queen's Rook. Ivan was my Bishop, Applejack was my Rook, and Fluttershy was my Knight. Spike was the Queen's Bishop's pawn. I noticed Applejack, Rarity, and Dash had fillies as their pawns. Probably Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo. These were statues, mind you; Scootaloo was riding on a scooter, Apple Bloom was in a gi in a pose with a kick and Sweetie Belle, oddly, was riding on a cloud and singing. Even though she's a unicorn, not a pegasus.
Lyra was my pawn, some pony with a curly mane and candy on her flank was Pinkie's pawn, a female unicorn with a wizard's hat and a cape with stars on it was Ivan's pawn, and a small rabbit who looked angry was Fluttershy's pawn.
"TRIXIE?" Twilight said in disbelief.
Soarin' was up on a platform on one side, and Spitfire, to her clear annoyance, was hanging from the ceiling inside a cage over the board.
Statues of all of our side, but in black obsidian, stood as the pieces against us.
"Tell me that ain't Apple Bloom turned to stone," Applejack said in horror.
Not-Soarin' now appeared on the other platform. "It's only a model. People will only die if Soarin' cannot figure out the puzzle." He whirred over the board and people flew around.
Applejack, Pinkie's pawn, Trixie, Fluttershy, the bunny, and Spike were all out of action now, along with a half-dozen black pieces.
"What the tarnation? I just got removed?" Applejack said, but couldn't move.
"It's a puzzle, not a game," Not-Soarin' said. "Now, what you know..."
Soarin' rattled off the solution without even listening.
"..."
"I read that book, you know."
"I didn't even get to explain the rules!"
"Too bad, you lose! We advance!"
"Dammit!" Not-Soarin' said. All the black pieces now turned into a dozen opals each.
"Lovely," Rarity said, eyes glittering.
Also, we all now had a lot of jewelry and knick-nacks which persisted. EXCELLENT. I have a sweet crown of gold with rubies and emeralds inset into it now, even if it doesn't really go well with my hat.
"And finally, you get this," not-Soarin' said, handing him a really nice smelling pie.
"Yes, PIE." He began eating, even as I said, "Wait!"
Soarin' now passed out; before Dash could move to help him, not-Soarin' zoomed in on her and said, "Hey, babe, evil-you is as sexy as good-you, I see!" Then he kissed Dash.
Twilight managed to catch Soarin', thankfully.
Dash turned beet red, then slapped him. "Don't go stealing kisses!" she said, red-faced. Then he teleported.
....
"Hey, I'm still in this stupid cage, get me out!" Spitfire shouted.
"He teleported?" Twilight said in confusion.
"Thanks to MY power. If you actually STUDIED enough, you'd be able to teleport things TO you too," Dawn Gleaming said. "So I teleported Cruisin' to me, you know, the way you cannot." She sounded quite proud.
Twilight grimaced. "Dash, I'm going to make you bigger so you can carry Ivan up to unlock the cage."
"Sweet!" She paused and looked at Soarin'.
"Go ahead," Soarin' said and Spitfire nodded approvingly.
They soon got Spitfire free and we headed onwards, stashing our treasures for later.
*************
The next room had a bunch of stacks of blocks with handles. You could see an exit sign but blocks were in the way of actually getting to it, and you'd have to rearrange them, which could be tricky given that pushing some of them would push others around.
"KILL IT WITH FIRE," Ivan said to Twilight.
"But we..." Rainbow Dash began.
"KILL KILL KILL," Ivan shouted and Twilight shrank in on herself.
"Okay, okay," she said weakly and began blowing up blocks.
"But we...," Rainbow Dash began.
"KILL THE BLOCKS! KILL THEM NOW!" Ivan screamed fit to wake the dead.
I began hacking up blocks and soon we'd smashed all the blocks to bits, though this left everyone tired.
"I don't see why we couldn't fly over them," Rainbow Dash said. "Was there a trap?"
Ivan whimpered and fell down.
"Dash," I said, burying my face in my hands.
"Well, Spitfire wanted me to show I could obey orders," Rainbow Dash said to the floor. "Though it's really not my style."
"Blocks dead, I win," Ivan said.
Twilight toppled over, legs in the air.
Spike went to Pinkie. "Pie."
She gave him one and he threw at Ivan's face.
"Pie," he said, then started laughing. "The blocks turned into pie!"
If this gets us killed because we needed Twilight functional, I am going to KILL him.
*******************
The pegasi had to fly us across a chasm; steam vented upwards through it. Then we passed into a temple, and Ivan's breath caught. "It's a temple of Asterius," he said nervously.
There was a huge stained glass window over the altar; it showed Princess Luna and Asterius. He was solemnly blessing the viewer and she... was picking his pocket, his wallet in her mouth. ...
Pinkie Pie fell over laughing.
Ivan stared, mouth open wide.
"Don't laugh, it ain't polite," Applejack said to Pinkie.
"But it's so..."
"Do not laugh," she said very firmly, and then nodded at Ivan, who couldn't see her.
Pinkie covered her mouth but this made her laugh more and then Dash began laughing at her, and trying to cover her mouth.
"He's not her father, right?" Ivan said weakly.
"My understanding is that her father was a Pony," Twilight said. "But I only know the legend. But they're both Immortals, so they could be friends."
It didn't convey family to me, or romance, just a kind of teasing friendship.
Applejack studied the picture, then crept up on Ivan, who was staring at the picture, then tried to subtly pick his pocket. He noticed, they started wrestling around and then bumped right into the altar. He was laughing, then he looked mortified, then he looked nervous.
"I can't... I don't even know what to do," he mumbled. "I'm in over my head."
"You can do it," Applejack said reassuringly, and then she kneeled with him as he kneeled down and prayed. The rest of us just stood back quietly, though I could hear Twilight very softly saying some sort of prayer to Asterius. Rarity was doing the same, which makes sense given one of his aspects is trade.
The other is thieving. An odd combination, but I guess he had a very varied life.
And then the stained glass began to glow and everything changed. I realized what this was going to be, but at least it wasn't MY flashback.
***************
MAGICAL ASTERIUS INDUCED FLASHBACK THING:
Luna hid among the rocks; it was easy in the darkness; from here you could peer over the edge of the plateau; halfway down it, you could see ponies and orcs busy delving into the plateau, building some kind of fortress. Another pony was with her; he had a pitch black coat and a silvery mane and on his flank was the full moon in silver. She was a Pegasus, I realized, not an alicorn yet, and he was an Earth Pony. But she already had her cutie mark.
"She should be here by now," Luna said, clearly worried. "Where is she, uncle Full Moon?"
"She walks among them," her uncle said. "We must know more before we strike."
Distantly, you could see a pony stumble and fall and an orc began to whip it and I could see Luna tense. She started to move, but he restrained her gently. "Not yet. Kalibash is here and you are not ready to face him yet." His voice was heavy with regret. "Not without Celestia."
"Why do we even exist if not for this? If not for now?" Luna said, agonized by the sight.
I could tell the unfortunate pony was being made an example of. He had a white coat and a blond mane and I think he was a unicorn. He threw the orc off the cliff with his powers and began to shout and now a riot broke out, pony vs. orc, but the ponies... most of them were just fleeing. A few fought but the rest were scared and the fear was running through the herd, they wanted to defy the orcs but they were understandably scared.
"Fight! Rally to me!" the unicorn shouted. Several of the stallions and fillies rushed to his side and Luna made a choked gasp as they formed a circle. There were six of them, three stallions and three fillies. They were clearly scared, but they stood together as everyone else ran away from angry orcs or ran wild in a panic.
"Together! We must stand together!," the unicorn shouted.
"I must aid them," Luna said and launched herself downwards towards the small plateau below where the work had been in progress and now a revolt was underway.
"Luna, we... the plan... dammit!" Full Moon said. "I can't fly, you know!"
She arched up and let him clamber on and now she flew downwards, silver dust flying from her wings as they flapped and everyone, orc and pony alike, stared at the two of them as they descended. What I could see now was that while the ponies had the wild colors I expect of sentient ponies, they had no cutie marks.
But now, as Luna's dust fell upon the six, cutie marks appeared. Overlapping four pointed stars of gold and silver on the unicorn stallion, an hourglass on the flank of the blue coated unicorn mare, a constellation on the flank of a green coated pegasus mare, a musical note in red on the flank of a grey coated earth pony stallion and so forth. They looked a little taller as well; these ponies were not quite as large as modern ponies, which is not to say modern ones are large. They are, after all, ponies. Luna and Full Moon were larger than them, but not so much larger as Celestia is to ponies today.
"I am Luna," Luna said warmly. "I have come from the Northlands to stand with my sister Celestia and my uncle Full Moon against the darkness that infests this land!"
Full Moon, for a moment, had a worried look, but then he was 'on' and all fear was gone. There was only confidence and strength. An orc rushed at him and he casually spun and rearkicked it, sending it tumbling. "Ponies! You are stronger than you know! Come with us, we will lead you to safety!"
And then they charged down the long, rambling path which picked its way down the plateau towards the thick forest below, a great herd of ponies, being lead and guided by the six who had stood together, and by Luna and Full Moon.
"What do we do when they come for us?" a filly cried out. She still had a small wagon of rocks, bumping along behind her as she ran, until Full Moon chewed it loose so she could run full speed.
"We fight," Full Moon said. "Ponies were not made for war, but we have no choice." He grimaced.
Luna said, "I do not wish to fight, but sometimes, even the kindest heart must take up arms and do battle." Her voice was very sad.
"It's why I rose up," an earth mare said, one of the six; she had a red cross on her flank and her name was Gentle Touch. "I would rather heal than hurt, but we cannot live like this any more. It is too much." Her voice was heavy with sadness. "It is too much."
"Celestia should have the records by now," Full Moon said as they all continued to run. "We must find the Elements of Harmony." His eyes ran over the six marked Ponies.
"Assuming she can find us," he muttered, then sighed. It was too late now to turn back.
And now Full Note, the music-marked earth pony, began to sing and soon, the herd was running to the beat which he laid down, speeding them up.
And the vision faded.
***************
Pinkie's eyes were wide. "The Elements of Harmony. Were they the first?"
"I don't think so," Spitfire said. "Or they wouldn't be 'finding' them. I would assume some Immortals made the Elements and originally granted them to Ponies or whoever first held them."
"They're much older," Twilight said. "Very old," she said softly.
From before Entropy was corrupted, I thought, shivering.
"That one pony... North Star..." Rarity said hesitantly.
"Blueblood's ancestor, yes," Twilight said to her apologetically.
Rarity stared at the floor.
"Blood doesn't matter," Ivan said. "Each person makes themself, whoever their ancestors were. What matters is who you choose to be and what you do with what you have." His voice drifted; he seemed somewhat lost. He bent over and curled up, burying his face in his knees, silently, and I wondered what he'd seen. That was inspiring if it was anything.
Applejack sat by him and put a comforting hoof on his back.
Pinkie licked her lips. "Rarity, I need to borrow your hat."
Rarity blinked but handed it over, no questions asked.
Pinkie donned it, then went over to Ivan and whispered to him. He made an enigmatic hand gesture and she dug in his coat pocket and pulled out a bottle.
Why is she getting his polymorph potion?
She clumsily sipped a small amount, then made a strangled noise and nearly dropped it and then her body rippled and shone and she said something and when it cleared, she was a ruddy-cheeked human woman with fancy pink hair, clad in leather pants and a multi-colored blouse, barefoot and wearing saddlebags wrapped around her waist like a belt. Then she embraced him silently from the side and whispered in his ears.
I felt I had to do something, but what? I rocked back and forth on my feet. Ivan is my friend for all that we sometimes try to clobber each other. I couldn't let Pinkie do it all but I couldn't quite grasp the problem.
Unless he saw Asterius rejecting him but I don't think it's the case.
"I've never heard of them having an uncle," Rainbow Dash said to Twilight.
"The name is vaguely familiar to me, but he didn't take the lead like they did," Twilight said. "I'm not sure if I could have even told you he was their uncle. Though part of me wants to say he fought a minotaur for some reason."
"If Luna wasn't an Immortal yet, how did she give everyone their Cutie Marks?" Soarin' asked thoughtfully.
"They found their purpose at that moment," Ivan said softly from inside his crumpled up self. "Luna might have helped it along, but the strength came from their decision to fight."
I kneeled down by him; the urge to help was strong enough to surprise me. I'm not cruel or anything but I'm not a master of comforting. "Hey man, what's wrong?"
"You're not alone," Pinkie said softly, running her fingers through Ivan's hair gently, then staring at her fingers and smiling a little. She took a lock of his hair and teased his ear gently with it. "We are here for you always," she said.
It would be nice to live in a world where that was always true. Everything is fleeting; my life has made me keenly aware that everything ends.
Which sucks.
But it's easy, at a time like this, to forget that. "You'll succeed. It won't be easy," I told him. He's probably doomed, but you don't say that at a time like this. There is such a thing as too much honesty. "But you have to keep getting back in the saddle." I couldn't help but grin at that a little, given the company.
Twilight laughed way more than it deserved, looked embarrassed, then shut her mouth.
"Luna rushed off too," Rainbow Dash stagewhispered to Spitfire, then grinned, while Spitfire buried her face in her hooves.
"The odds don't matter," Pinkie said firmly to Ivan, continuing to cuddle him. "And sometimes, it's better to try and fail than not to have tried, right? They did what they had to, regardless of the odds and so will you. I'm rooting for you."
"Yaaay," Fluttershy said. Possibly the worst cheer ever but Ivan smiled at it. He now embraced Pinkie, and then Applejack, and then stood up.
"Let's go," Ivan said, trying to sound confident. "I haven't nearly died enough times today."
"That's the spirit," Pinkie said. She did a handstand. "Cool." Then she ran around and touched everyone with her hands, laughing. "Well, out of time," she said and turned back into regular Pinkie, then tossed the hat onto Rarity's head. "Thanks, Rarity," she said.
"How did it feel, Pinkie?" Rarity asked.
"Very comfy hat," Pinkie said. "Wow, I am HUNGRY." She now ate an entire cake in one bite, while I stared in surprise.
"I mean, being human," Rarity said.
"Hands are pretty useful," Pinkie said. "I think the potion makes it feel natural, though."
"Yes," Ivan said.
"I'm surprised nothing has tried to kill us yet," I said. "This doesn't quite feel like part of the dungeon, though I guess it does fit the 'moon' theme."
"That was Asterius in pony form, right?" Spike said.
"Who?" Rainbow Dash said.
"I suspect Full Moon was Asterius, yes," I said.
"Really?" Rainbow Dash said in surprise.
"He's very popular in Manehattan," Applejack said. "But they're a lot more human influenced there."
"Hmm, I wonder if the Elements of Power are all killing each other still or if they just can't hear us. You idiots listening?"
They didn't reply. Excellent. But I expect we'll have to face them again soon.
************
I stared in horror. Dozens of swinging blades swung back and forth, blocking the path to the door on the far end of the room. It looked insanely dangerous to try to run between them to reach the door.
"This one is for me," Spitfire said, stretching.
"I bet I could fly so fast I could to the other end before they could hit me," Rainbow Dash said.
"No, let Spitfire handle it. She's a precision flyer," Soarin' said to Rainbow Dash. "Not as quick but she can maneuver like no one's business."
"That looks really dangerous," Twilight said, wobbling a little. She was still pretty zonked from blowing up blocks.
"It is," Spitfire said. "But when you're a Wonderbolt, you have to handle this kind of thing, like when we had to rescue the Duke of Prance from kidnappers. They shrank him, put him inside a bottle, then hid him inside a giant clock and I had to fly through it while it was keeping time, before it hit 3. And I did it."
"I nearly died watching," Soarin' said.
I feel like I could die just watching those blades. And my hat... I can't let those things kill it. "If you think you can handle it, Spitfire, then you should do it."
"Wait!" Pinkie said. "SONG time!"
Of course it is.
o/~ Bravely, bravely, Spitfire flew into the blades,
o/~ Squealy, squealy, were the sounds that Marcus made!
"HEY!" I shouted.
Spitfire laughed. "Don't worry, Marcus, I'm a professional." She saluted Twilight, then turned and took a deep breath.
o/~ Tired, tired, Twilight wobbled on her feat,
o/~ Later she can rest once Spitfire turns up the heat!
o/~ Chop, chop went the blades
o/~ They think Spitfire tastes good with marinade!
"HEY!" Soarin' said, but Spitfire laughed, then closed her eyes.
I put a hand over my mouth. I normally would laugh, but I didn't want to laugh at someone about to risk DOOM.
Rarity pressed against my leg; I could tell she was nervous, so I patted her back. "Don't worry," I said softly. I have enough terror for every pony in this room, Ivan, myself, AND evil-me.
Though 'evil-me' doesn't seem to have much ambition beyond 'be Twilight's snuggle-wuggums.'
He hasn't talked much, though.
Also, I suspect evil non-Elements of Harmony were thrown in at the last second.
Spitfire took off, dodging blades, up, down and around them, timing her movements with great precision, anticipating the swings and following a jagged path; she even retreated at one point to advance later. I felt my nerves get more and more tense.
I could feel Rarity getting tenser and Rainbow Dash was half-watching, half-not. Pinkie continued to 'cheer' for Spitfire.
o/~ Freak, freak, the Rarity freaked,
o/~ As time went by, her tension peaked!
o/~ Tonight, many lettuce rolls
o/~ Will perish between her teeth!
"I am not going to overeat in response to this!" Rarity protested.
I could totally go for a nice lettuce roll with some tofu soaked in meat juices.
I suddenly wondered if ponies could actually handle meat juices or not. I don't know enough about digestion. And I can't ask Fluttershy when Spitfire may be about to get carved like a rump roast.
And that's when the jets of flame began shooting down from the ceiling. "Hope you've been practicing your fire swallowing!" Not-Spitfire said cheerfully. ...
"It won't matter if it can't hit me," Spitfire said defiantly, but now it was getting harder to advance without frying. Only extremely precision flying could do it, timing without room for error.
Rainbow Dash elbowed Soarin'. "Order me to make rain."
"W...oh. I order you to make it rain! I order ME to make it rain! You too, Fluttershy," he said.
"But I'm not good at making it rain," Fluttershy said.
"No time to learn like the present!"
"Hey, this is just for Evil-me!" not-Spitfire said.
"Yeah, Fire Swallow has been looking forward to this," Cruisin' said.
Tiny clouds began to form and they began bucking them into the blades which hit them and scattered water everywhere, countering the flame jets, though now there was steam everywhere. Spitfire pulled her goggles in tightly and kept going.
CHOP, there went her tail except for a tiny stub!
"Oh no, darling, your lovely tail!" Rarity said.
"A Wonderbolt cares nothing for looks!" Spitfire shouted.
"Hey, I care about looks," Cruisin' said.
"You're a FAKE Wonderbolt!," Spitfire said, dodging under a blade and rising just in front of another to go over it as it swung down.
"And my girlfriend has them!" Cruisin' said.
"You kissed Rainbow Dash!" Rainbow Crash said angrily. "I'm not going to...mmmm...." Pony kissy noises now mixed with Pinkie singing, rain and thunder going off, and Spitfire swishing along.
o/~ Kiss kiss, went the evil twins!
o/~ It'll save time; they're already down to just skin!
"Hey, I am wearing my UNIFORM," Cruisin' protested.
"At least we're not scared of kissing like Rainbow Dash! No one's ever kissed her!" Rainbow Crash shouted.
"LIE! I've kissed lots of stallions!" Rainbow Dash shouted, though I could tell she was LYING.
"They were all plushies!," Rainbow Crash shouted.
"At least I don't fall down getting into bed!" Rainbow Dash shouted.
"Less shouting, more cloudbucking! Spitfire needs you!" I shouted.
Dash struggled to ignore the taunts, but determinedly, she put more and more clouds into play and urged Fluttershy to work harder. Soarin' grimly kept kicking.
Finally, Spitfire reached the end, then she pulled out a bottle and drank from it. Then there was an odd noise and she spat fire at the door, which burned down. "Oh yeah," she said, then put the bottle away.
Oooh, nice.
Rarity relaxed and the blades stopped. "Let me see what I can do for your tail, darling. I know some nice bob cuts; at the least we MUST make it a nice even cut, not a raggedy one."
She was soon working on trying to turn this tail cut into an asset.
That's Rarity all over.
"Pinkie," I said. I had to stop her. "If you will stop, I will try to teach you the song from our flashback."
"YES!" said, hugging me. I immediately fell down, since Ponies are, in fact, heavy.
This kept her busy until Rarity finished and Fluttershy finished making sure Spitfire wasn't hurt. Rarity cut just a little off her own tail, extended Spitfire's magically just enough for it to be a cute bob instead of a disaster.
"So you can meld hair?" I said.
"Yes, though I'm not sure if it would work pony to human," she said. "You might look good with enough body to maybe curl your hair a little."
"Oh, I'm fine with how it is," I told her. "I was just curious."
I now got a lesson in hair magic as we headed out.
*************
The room looked simple; a big boxy room with a table full of pies on the other end. Soarin' drooled but did not rush to his death, thankfully.
That was apparently Pinkie's job. "FRESH PIE!"
DAMMIT PINKIE!!!!
Applejack lassoed Pinkie before she got far, then dragged her back. "Dammit, woman, it's just pie!"
"Wonderful, tasty pie. It smells sooooo good," Pinkie said, drooling.
"What a sad lack of self-control," Pinkamena, the not-Pinkie, said disapprovingly. "I didn't even realize you'd fall for this. Nicely done, Cruisin'."
She was so... calm.
Maybe even a little grim.
This disturbed me GREATLY.
"Thanks, Pinkamena. Your beauty inspired...ooof..." There was a sound like someone just started grappling Cruisin'.
"Eyes on the PRIZE," Rainbow Crash said.
"Someone needs to do something while I can hold out," Soarin' mumbled.
"We're on it," Ivan said and the two of us went forwards. He also got Rarity to come with us and started showing her how to pick a lock. She picked it disturbingly quickly.
"Pinkie, Pinkie, Pinkie, whatever will I do with you," Pinkamena said, sounding disappointed.
"GIVE ME PIE!" Pinkie shouted. She strained at the rope, her hair weirdly contorting and changing shape, eyes bulging, body quivering.
"What do you think, Madam LeFlour?" Pinkamena said to someone we obviously couldn't see.
"I think Pinkie will never have un boyfriend unless she and Soarin' date ze same pie," 'Madam LeFlour' said. She sounded suspiciously like Pinkamena trying to fake a Prance accent.
"Oh god, not again," Spike groaned.
Dammit, can't disarm traps and talk to Spike at the same time!
"Are you the Power of No Fun?" Applejack asked, clearly amused.
"Dammit, is that bastard Rocky there?" Rainbow Dash said angrily.
"You wanna piece of me? You wanna PIECE OF ME?" Rocky said angrily. Though he sounded suspiciously like Pinkamena trying to fake a Bucklynn accent.
"I am the Power of Influence," Pinkamena said in her normal voice. "I know what moves people and how they interact with each other, using it to my advantage. Unlike my evil twin the nitwit."
"Dammit, Applejack, those pies will not eat themselves, let me go!" Pinkie tried gnawing on the rope. "Ivan, give me some potion so I can turn into a snake and slither out of this!"
"You know, it's still our turn, Pinkamena," Fire Swallow said to Pinkamena.
Pinkamena's voice turned soft and apologetic. "I'm sorry, but I may not have this chance to get through Pinkie's thick skull again. Please forgive me?" She sounded close to blubbering.
My god, it's my soul in Pinkie's body, I realized.
Oh hoh hoh. A worthy challenger!
"Marcus, darling, why are you smiling so much?" Rarity asked me softly.
"Focus, man, or we'll set these traps off on us," Ivan said.
"Sorry, I have to defuse a verbal bomb," I told him. "Rarity, please help Ivan. I have to stop Pinkamena."
"Remember what happened the last time you forgave her?" I told Cruisin'. I actually have no clue but I suspect that he regretted it, yet she found ways to get him to forgive her again.
"I...umm... well, yeah, I still can't use that uniform... they say the stain will never come out..." Cruisin' said hesitantly.
SCORE.
"If Applejack REALLY liked you, she'd let you have the pie and not stop you," Pinkamena said with a third voice, vaguely noble and male in tone.
Pinkie hesitated, eyes wide.
"Don't listen to her," Rainbow Dash said urgently, coming over to Pinkie. "She's just messing with your head!"
"I'll give you a kiss if you forgive me," Pinkamena said to Cruisin'.
Dammit, I can't use that lever. Unless... "You know Rainbow Dash's kisses are better, Cruisin'." HAH!
"Damn straight!" Rainbow Dash shouted. "I mean... I didn't enjoy it AT ALL!" She looked worriedly at Soarin', then frowned when he was clearly too busy staring at the pies to even notice what she said. "I said, I WOULD RATHER KISS SOARIN'!"
Then she turned bright red.
"I'm sorry, did you say something?" Soarin' said to Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash buried her face in her hooves. "Stallions are so DENSE!"
"We have more muscle," Soarin' said.
I would give him an obliviousness award if I had one.
"Your lips are only for ME," Rainbow Crash said. "Back off, Pinkamena!" I heard fast motion swishing.
Fluttershy now flew over to Pinkie. "You know we love you," she said warmly. "Won't you come play with me?"
"Of course!" Pinkie said, relaxing. She and Fluttershy now began playing some kind of clapping game. It seemed to involve clapping their hooves together in elaborate patterns.
I heard Pinkamena make a noise of definite disgust.
"Of course, Rainbow Crash, I just wanted to make it up to Cruisin', and you know how he loves kissing every woman in sight," Pinkamena said apologetically.
Damn, she's good.
"CRUISIN'!"
Now Pinkamena's free to turn on us.
Ivan and Rarity continued to work on the traps, trying to hurry.
Aaargh, I don't know Pinkie well enough to know what a twisted Pinkie's buttons are beyond...
"Pinkamena Diane Pie, go sort the rock harvest!" I shouted.
I heard her run off, then a distant "DAMMIT!"
Man, that's a button a mile wide... unless she's bluffing.
It could be a clever plan to make me THINK she has a huge weakness. I will have to be careful.
Oh yes, I am going to enjoy this.
"As long as it is disarmed, you don't have to perfectly reset it," Ivan said to Rarity.
"A job worth doing is worth doing right," she said, carefully oiling the mechanism.
Ivan rubbed his forehead and I laughed softly. "Okay, it's safe to approach the pies, I think, but they're probably all deathtraps but one."
"Deathtraps?" Soarin' said, frowning.
"Anything edible in a dungeon usually mutates you, or it turns out to have bees inside it," I said.
"Or small dogs which bark up bees when they howl at you," Ivan said.
"And the bees are ON FIRE," I said. Fortunately, I lost the burn scars when I stopped being Aristobolus, I think.
"I can handle dogs," Applejack said.
"Bees? That means honey! Come here, pie full of bees!" Pinkie said, rushing forwards.
Applejack reached for her lasso, then just sighed.
Pinkie scarfed down one of the pies. "Mmm, tasty apples, feels so good, oh yes, oh... dear."
I knew it.
Pinkie now began choking and it took Ivan and myself and Spike all cooperating to get her to cough it up. A RING!
It was a silver ring carved to resemble winds blowing. "Cool," Pinkie said, cleaning it off. She tossed it to Soarin'. "I ate your pie, so you can have the toy that comes with it."
"It's a magic item," I said.
"Yes, but it's clearly for him. I'm sorry," she said.
This ring would comfort him greatly when the next pie, the one he ate, turned out to be full of hermit crabs.
Then they would NOT STOP CLACKING EVERYWHERE. Damn crabs.
Having Pinkie running around with three crabs clinging to her tail saying it reminded her of Gummy did not help.
Though it made Ivan laugh.
Fluttershy soon rounded up the crabs and gave them instructions on how to get to their giant brethren
Once we got everything sorted out, Twilight figured out that the ring augmented a Pegasus' ability to generate and manipulate wind, as you might guess. Soarin' was quite pleased with it.
Rainbow Dash, on the other hand, looked kind of frustrated. Probably because of his romantic blindness. Going to have to do something to help her later.
*************
We now secured the next key from the next room and decided to camp and rest, since Twilight was pretty worn out and everyone else needed a rest too. The fact that none of the treasures we'd found so far had been on Vermicoritax's list made me partly happy (we would keep it all) and partly unhappy (as it meant we still hadn't recovered any of the treasure and we don't have infinite time for it.) But we needed a break.
I pulled Dash aside. "If you don't just make your move, it'll drag on forever, you know."
"Marcus, we can't... wait, what?" Dash said, now confused.
What? Now I'm confused.
"You like Soarin', right?" I said.
"I... like all of the Wonderbolts," Dash told my foot.
"Yes, but this is special, right?"
"I can't tell at all if he's even interested. Whereas my stupid evil twin HAS AN EVIL BOYFRIEND." Dash shook her hooves at the sky. Ceiling. You know what I mean.
"Who kissed you," I said.
"Yes," she said, staring off at the wall and fluttering about aimlessly.
"At least it wasn't YOUR evil twin kissing you," I told her.
"..."
"Look, I'm sure he likes you. Be bold. Isn't that your real self?" I told her.
"But... none of the rest of the couples among them are... dating... in our group," Rainbow Dash said nervously.
OH. I see why she's nervous now. "Well, if an evil Soarin' can love an evil Dash, I can't see why a good one wouldn't," I told her, trying to sound confident. "You're very lovable"
She gave me an odd look. "I... Marcus..." Now she was more nervous. What on earth... OH. She thinks I have a crush on her.
"I just want what will make you happy," I told her, but this clearly made her feel guilty. Dammit, find the right button... "Fortune favors the bold, right?"
"Hell yeah," she said confidently, then got nervous again. "What if he says no?" she squeaked.
"There's a ton of other handsome pegasi," I told her. "And you can't win the race if you don't run it. Be confident. Just imagine it's a race to his heart and go for it."
She closed her eyes, then looked more confident. "I'll go for it!"
She looked over. "Once he stops talking to Spitfire."
I rubbed my forehead. That could be a wait.
Well, I TRIED.
***************
Fluttershy made happy noises as I brushed her coat. Rarity was busy trying to clean her hair. I'd suggested this as I wanted to thank her for all the healing. And you always gain favor. Spitfire kept looking at me funny. I am just helping a friend, woman!
Dash was busy NOT confessing and I wondered what I would have to do to get her in motion.
"Angel Bunny normally helps me with this," Fluttershy said.
"Your boyfriend?" I asked.
"My pet," she said. "He's a cute little white bunny."
"He's a MENACE to all civilized folk," Spike said from over by Twilight. "Need any help, Rarity?"
"You can brush me if you like," Rarity said, then made happy noises when he did.
You're just encouraging him, you know. I could see how this had gone on forever, though. Rarity enjoys attention, he enjoys giving it.
But if they're both happy, I wasn't going to stick my head into it. I let him work and I worked on Fluttershy. Eventually I finished, then she brushed my hair. "You should grow your mane out some, since your coat is so faint and weak," she said.
"It would look nice," Rarity said.
"I'll think about it." I don't know if I will be around that long or if I will LIVE that long, though this is going well so far.
If you can't see your own bones, it is a good day. I'd taken my hat off, so I petted it as Fluttershy worked my hair.
"I guess that is your pet," she said.
"He is a good pet," I said, smiling. "I am very grateful to Rarity."
"I was glad to help you, darling," she said to me.
Ivan was trying to teach a reluctant Applejack and Pinkie a dance. Pinkie was loving it, Applejack had a harder time staying on two legs for it. "Come here," Ivan said to me.
"Hold on, being groomed," I told him.
He facepalmed but soon the four of us joined him in a fancy Karameikan style dance. You needed equal numbers of men and women, so Fluttershy just sang to give us a beat. It was a lot of fun, though Rarity wasn't any more used to two legs than Applejack. But falling down really just made it more fun.
Then the ladies went to talk, Ivan took Spike aside and I went and worked with Twilight for a while, though she was pretty tired and we mainly just read and talked a little. Finally, she said, "Dash thinks you have a crush on her."
I laughed. "I'm not sure why she thinks that. But I think she and Soarin' will do well if they ever get their act together."
Twilight studied my hands and said, "You know about Spike's crush on Rarity, right?" Her voice was soft.
"Yes," I told her. "He's mad at me, but he'll get over it. He's a good guy. But he's young and he has a crush and I expect everyone male who comes near Rarity makes him kind of freak out."
"Yes," Twilight said. "Just be patient, he's only a baby."
"You'd best conserve your strength tomorrow; likely we'll have to throw down with our evil twins and they'll be rested."
"I know, it worries me," she said. "I'm also a little worried about you and Ivan in an area designed to make it hard for Earth Ponies. Even I can probably jump further than you and so on."
"Yes, but we have hands," I said, showing them off. "We'll have to see. One thing, though, is we likely should try to avoid going head to head with our own evil twins, tempting as it is. As if they're the Elements of Power, they can likely take us in our strong points."
Twilight winced. "It's clear Dawn Gleaming has more time to study." She glanced off at Rarity. "I think she really liked helping you with the traps."
"She's got the right mindset for it," I told Twilight. "Working with her is fun. She thinks I should grow my hair out."
"You should," Twilight said. "A good mane is essential for a man's looks." Then she looked embarrassed. "I can't believe I said that."
"I could dye it pink and green to fit in better," I teased her and she laughed.
"Pinkie seemed to find it easy to be a human for a few minutes," Twilight said hesitantly. "To comfort Ivan."
"It was very nice of her. The potion gives you the instincts you need to function well," I told her.
She licked her lips nervously as if wanting to say something but not quite able to say it. I tried to intuit it.
She never did quite find the strength to say it and eventually, we went to bed, leaving me curious. I'd have thought it was related to the plans she'd had to try being human back in the old days, but she has no reason to experiment with that now.
Though I suppose she may just be curious what it's like, assuming she hasn't already tried it out.
I laid down to sleep under a nice warm blanket. With a nice soft pillow. And a cold, hard stone floor.
Well, you can't have it all.
Rarity said softly to me, "Marcus." She sounded rather guilty. This was probably about me getting mangled, I suspected.
"It's okay," I said to her. "Thanks to Fluttershy, I'm all better."
"I hate seeing you get hurt," she said, still guilty. I didn't want her to feel TOO guilty. Owing me is good but, you know, she would have done it for any of us.
"I couldn't let you get hurt, but I know you would have done the same." Hopefully this won't lead to doing suicidal things to try to pay me back.
"It was a very noble thing to do," she said.
Inspired by first my paranoia and then my practicality; I couldn't warn them, so I had to try to slow down the assault. And kind of warned them by getting mangled.
But I got better.
She licked her lips softly. "My parents will want to meet you," she said. "When Father gets some leave."
"I'd be happy to meet him and your sisters," I said to her. I have nothing to fear from him.
Maybe.
Less to fear.
I tried to remember my parents, but they're a blur. There were too many of us. I'm sure of that, but now... Dammit. What is my name? I had been Dmitri at one point, I could feel that for sure now, but before him... tunnels... halls... burrows?
I felt more and more agitated as I grasped at memories and they fought each other. The sword. I think... I'd found it. Several times. Somehow.
It had been a bow... an axe... a sword... something... a mace? Before it was a sword. Something about hornets...
I could see a ruins, layer after layer descending into the earth. Dwarves had dug too greedily, blah, blah, you know the drill. Some days, I'm surprised every dwarf hasn't been eaten yet.
I guess the smart ones take the mithril and run, leaving only the stupid to die.
I saw dead people, halflings, an entire adventuring party wiped out before us, which didn't stop us going deeper.
Because adventurers NEVER listen.
"Marcus."
Why was Rarity in the dungeon with us? Had I met her yet? Damn, I have huge hands...
"Marcus, snap out of it," Rarity said, worried. "Twilight!"
The entire dungeon smelled like ass. That's when I discovered something important. Do not light torches if it smells like rotten eggs.
It had found us, of course, when our cleric was busy praying to Kagyar to heal us. She had a huge beard, too big, really; it was kind of vain, and she was SO vain about it. As it stood, I had the BAD kind of face full of beard when she was trying to heal me and of course I started choking on her beard. This never ends well.
That's when it came through a wall, a three headed serpent made of adamantine, mithril, and rubies. It was a king's fortune, made to kill people. Fundin got eaten right off the bat, though I'm pretty sure we resurrected him after we cut it open and found his feet intact thanks to his AWESOME magical boots. They let him run like a crazy maniac and I envied them so much.
Dored raised his axe and charged berserkly forwards. "GIVE ME YOUR EYES!!!!" he shouted. Dored is a Sryklist; they're a mercantile and craft clan; he's a jeweler, but he's also a great warrior, which we are going to need to stop this damn thing.
"Marcus, snap out of it," Dash said urgently. She shaved her beard? Why? I don't remember her disgracing herself...
"What happened to your beard?" I asked her. "And look out for the snake!" I grabbed her and rolled as she yelped in surprise.
"Beard?" Dash said, confused. Someone stole her beard and is messing with her mind!
"Marcus!" Rarity said, agitated.
"Nothing but a copy wearing out," Pinkamena said mournfully.
"SILENCE!" Rarity snapped angrily and I could feel something magical. When did she start... she has a horn!
No, wait, she always has a horn. Why am I wrestling with Dash... dammit!
Now I felt Rarity somehow touching my mind. Or maybe it was Twilight. Or Twilight AND Rarity. I felt my mind shuffle.
And then the cards fell into place and I was just Marcus again, breathing hard. "I am really sorry, Dash," I said.
"That woman," Rarity said with acid in her voice, "Will pay for this. She is running up a large tab and I intend to collect every bit."
I let go of Dash. "I'm really sorry about that, I thought a giant three headed serpent made of mithril and adamantium was after you," I told her.
"Wow, that would be soooo tasty," Spike said. "Did it have gemstone eyes?"
"Yes," I said.
I looked at Fluttershy, expecting her to tell us copper is tastier but she didn't comment.
She came over. "Sit down, please," she said.
I did so and she checked me over, including getting Twilight to shine her horn in my eyes, leaving me seeing flashing lights. "He should be fine," Fluttershy said.
Rarity was pacing tensely, while Twilight checked me out as well. Ivan was watching me, looking worried.
"So you were hallucinating for no reason?" Dash said, sounding worried.
"It was her," Rarity said, angrily. "She will find it that it is unwise to try and take a unicorn by the horn."
"It's okay," I told her. "We'll get our chance to settle things with them later. If you don't relax, you won't be able to sleep."
"I don't want to relax," Rarity said. "I want to make her pay." She was shivering.
Pinkie now nuzzled her. "It's okay. Evil-me is evil, but I will deal with her."
"You can have Clarity. She probably just needs a hug. But I cannot allow her to do this to Marcus," Rarity said.
"I'll hug Clarity until she's all good and soft and cuddly!" Pinkie said, then said, "But getting so mad is going to give you wrinkles, Rarity."
"I'm sure she wants us to get mad and do crazy things," I told Rarity. "You have to play it cool."
"I can be cool," she said hotly and sat down next to me, sphinx-style.
Wow, she's really worked up. Of course, ponies can bond to people pretty fast. And I know I wouldn't be happy if this happened to her either.
She's strangely impressive when she's angry.
"I think you'll be okay now," Twilight said and yawned. "We should sleep."
Don't think about the past, I decided. Not when I have to hide everything.
Rarity carefully wiped my face with a lace handkerchief. "It will be okay," she said to me softly. "I will protect you as you protected me."
"Thank you, Rarity," I said softly to her, lying down and tucking my pillow in place.
I could hear her pacing again as I fell asleep; I hope she gets enough sleep. We'll need her tomorrow.
***************
The first stage of our return trek went smoothly until we reached the room with the trees and the mist and the angry monkeys. It was now night in that room; who knows what the real time outside was. Twilight enlarged Dash so I could ride on her, then teleported Pinkie and herself to the other side. Spike rode Applejack and Ivan rode in the saddlebags, looking quite silly with his head poking out. Fluttershy could fly herself and Soarin' carried Rarity, with Spitfire pacing him.
"I feel like a member of the Thyatian Air Force," I said as we started across the room.
Dash dodged a hail of coconuts. "And the monkeys are the Alphatians?"
I laughed at that.
Then dozens of bats on fire dove down out of the night sky. DAMN WANDERING MONSTERS!
"Hold on tight," Rainbow Dash said and I paled and bent down to hold on.
Then Soarin' grinned. "Hold on, Rarity."
"Let me do it," Spitfire said. "Maneuver 12-X."
Soarin' suddenly began to climb, higher and higher and I wondered where the ceiling of this room was. Some of the bats gave chase, clumping up and then Spitfire roared through them, flinging them in all directions, many colliding with others to knock them down.
"Bad bats, you should... oh no!" Fluttershy said. Normally fire bats burn plants and eat the ashes. But that would mean slaughtering the trees. No druid could go for that except maybe to make a firebreak to stop a forest fire that wasn't scheduled.
Ivan was throwing apples at the bats that swarmed Applejack, but now one of the trees caught fire with him, Spike and Applejack on it. Spike tried breathing fire but the bats, as you might guess, liked it.
Him punching them in the face... they didn't like that at all.
Or getting kicked by Applejack, though she yelped when she hit them.
Pinkie began some sort of song but I could hardly hear her with all the monkey shouting, coconut and apple flinging and being hauled around at extremely high speed which made me too terrified to do anything but hang on as Rainbow Dash zoomed about, slugging monkeys and throwing firebats hither and yon.
"Fire," I shouted, and she rose up and began whirling to form a cloud while the Wonderbolts skirmished with the bats, battering and tossing them.
Fluttershy joined us and they began forming a storm to put out the flaming tree, as Applejack tried to make her way through the burning branches, dodging monkeys, coconuts, firebats, and coconuts on fire.
I tried to both think of something to do and to focus enough to actually DO it. Everything was spinning so fast...I could hear snatches of Pinkie singing about rings of fire and...
Then lightning balls erupted through the flaming tree, nailing a dozen monkeys at once and sending them plunging into lower branches. Applejack made a break for the next tree and the rain started to come down.
"Hey Crash, you listening?" I shouted.
"I'm here, clone-boy," she said irritably.
"What are you the Power of?"
"Excellence!" Rainbow Crash crowed. "I am the fastest and greatest of racers in all of Equestria! And humble, too!"
"And very cute," Soarin' said. Kissy noises ensued and I regretted asking, though at least now I knew.
It would be useful later, when the real battle began. Very proud, a useful thing to know.
Firebats attacked us but I laid about with my sword, injuring and driving them off, letting Dash and Fluttershy focus on their work; they soon had lots of rain going and now the firebats fled. Dammit, they probably have gems in them or something and they are RUNNING AWAY WITH MY TREASURE.
Dash and Fluttershy finished saving the trees and now we all flew on out and headed back so we could try route three.
************ |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book Three (White Plume Mountain): Part 3: Princess Marjorie, I Presume? | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 3: White Plume Mountain
Part 3: Princess Marjorie, I Presume?
By John Biles
***************
We had returned to the center section to start the third part of the dungeon. Etrusca was waiting for us. "Ready for the next riddle?"
"Ready," Twilight said.
"It's probably a hug from Marcus," Ivan said, amused.
I had to give him a manly whack for that. He just laughed.
"It's a coffin. No one wants to end up in one and the dead, of course, don't know they need it," Twilight said.
"You win," Etrusca said, then sighed. "You enjoy your trip. I'll sit here for the rest of my decades to go."
Fluttershy looked thoughtful, then went over to the century flower. She began to sing and the plant stirred.
But then nothing happened. Pinkie began providing musical backing.
And then Fluttershy's element flared to life and suddenly the plant flowered. "Go see your grandchildren," she said, smiling.
I jumped in surprise at the sudden burst of power, but seeing it was just a plant flowering, I managed to calm my fit of panic. I'd seen the Elements in action before, but this was a dungeon and anything here could kill you. Even nice things.
Etrusca stared, eyes wide. "You... thank you!"
Being hugged by a sphinx made Fluttershy very happy, though she also looked to be in danger of being squished.
Etrusca then said, "Thank you all! Enjoy the rest of the dungeon!"
I'll enjoy the treasure, anyway.
She took off and we headed off down the undefended hallway.
************
I patted Rarity's back. "Calm down, you'll make yourself sick," I told her.
We were headed down the tunnel into the third area, which I suspected would have wall to wall undead.
"I am fine," she insisted, but I could tell otherwise. It was kind of nice to have someone angry on my behalf, but anger leads to impulsive action which leads to PAIN and DEATH.
That being said, as the man who threw himself in front of rock monsters for her, I can't complain about impulsiveness.
"Wait, WHAT?" Dash said to Spitfire, who buried her face in her hooves. Then she glanced at me, eyes wide, then back at Spitfire.
If that's her telling Dash I was Erik, the whole world would soon know and then I will DIE HORRIBLY. Dammit, I do not need more things to...
Ivan stopped me. "Keep your foot in the air before you hit the trigger."
He and Rarity disarmed the pressure plate my foot was an inch above, and then we moved on; I determined to pay attention more. I have to make sure Rarity doesn't get hurt trying to keep me from getting hurt. I couldn't stand that.
************
The next trap was pretty slick. Basic pit trap goes off. Applejack, of course, easily dodged it, then jumped over it. Landing on ANOTHER pit trap and then she slid down a greased slide into a tank full of sharks.
Pinkie, of course, deliberately jumped in and not just to help Applejack, but because it was a greased slide. "WOOHOO!"
The floor turned transparent, so we could watch them. The Wonderbolts and Dash flew down and rioting ensued, water churning wildly. Fluttershy carefully flew down and began trying to ask the sharks to stop but they were apparently too mean to care.
Ivan and I wouldn't be much use, so we worked our way down the hallway, removing traps or disarming them. Twilight began using her power to grab sharks so her friends could slug them, while Rarity watched warily and worked with Ivan and I.
Finally, Fluttershy said, "Turn them upside down."
To my surprise, this knocked them out quickly. Dang.
We then helped them all clamber up, using ropes and telekinesis. Rainbow Dash soon dried everyone off. "That was easy," Dash said. "How does that work?"
"They can't get air if they are upside down as moving forces their gill slits shut," Fluttershy said. "And sharks have to always keep moving to breathe. Anyway, they should recover now."
I expect earth ponies on their own either wouldn't fall in if careful or could fight them all off enough to escape.
Maybe.
That's the thing about dungeons. You have a CHANCE, but it's not guaranteed. And sometimes requires you to more or less guess what the creator of it is thinking.
I'm kind of surprised the sharks weren't undead, really.
************
We moved through a series of twisty, bendy hallways which took us up and down ramps and around and around until our sense of direction was utterly gone.
Which is why Twilight carries a compass.
Things went slowly as she insisted on carefully mapping out the mess of hallways so we could return more easily. This meant, at times, having Ivan or myself lie down so we could be used as a measuring stick. Our hands got used a lot too.
Pinkie sighed. "This rock reminds me of Gummy. I hope he's okay."
Unless Gummy is an irregular ovoid of brown rock with flecks of silver, I am not sure how this works.
Maybe he is.
"I hope Opalescence is okay," Rarity said. "Given we took Ponyville's town vet with us."
"I'm sure Apple Bloom and her friends will make sure they get fed," Applejack said. "They won't get distracted." Everyone looked at her dubiously. "Okay, I can't lie. It's a good thing Winona can hunt her own food if she has to." She sighed. "Big Mac and Granny will take care of Winona, but he's got double work with me gone."
"You should hire a hand or two, darlin," Rarity said. "Until you or Big Mac or eventually Apple Bloom get married, you could really use some help."
"I got Snails handlin' the weeding," Applejack said a little stubbornly. "And Apple Bloom is supposed to help."
"Like when she tried to help turn the grain silo into an airship," Rarity pointed out.
"Sweetie Belle helped too, you know," Applejack said, sounding frustrated.
"I know some handsome fellows, they would be glad to help you out," Rarity continued.
"I don't need no boyfriend," Applejack said. "Not everyone thinks about romance."
"If someone in your family doesn't, the Apple family ends here with your generation," Rarity said flatly.
"We can argue over who gets bred together to produce the ultimate cosmic pony messiah later," Pinkie said. "Less talking, MORE MAPPING."
Rarity produces incredibly beautiful maps, but it takes forever, as she wants to put each room in a 3-d cutaway with all the details. Twilight finds this so great, she tends to encourage her.
As we slowly picked our way through, distantly, we heard, "Dammit, I know those ponies are around here somewhere. I can smell them!" The voices were rough and growly in tone.
"I know, but we just went round the same loop TWICE," another one growled.
"Dammit, we're supposed to be the wandering monsters, not THEM. Why can't they stand still so we can eat them?" a third complained.
I had to put my hand over my mouth not to laugh.
Twilight quickly wrote on paper, 'Let's hide and ambush. Dash, Soarin', you're designated bait.'
We tried to hide around corners; Pinkie put on her Boots of Spider-Pinkie and clung to the ceiling with Spitfire hidden next to her and Fluttershy lurking by her. Dash and Soarin' floated in the middle of a five-way intersection. "Oh, Dash, we're finally alone," Soarin' said, trying to be smooth. "We can do anything we want."
Rainbow Dash turned beet red. "Anything? Like... anything anything?"
"Anything you like," he said. "Even upside down."
"You wouldn't rather I was a pie, right?" she said, then clearly wanted to die.
"You're much better than pie," he said, "Fair lady Rainbow Dash." He took her hoof and kissed it. "Your beautiful hair... reminds me of the dawn. Your skin is... the sky on a fair spring morning."
Holy shit, he CAN be smooth. He...
Then I noticed Twilight had out her copy of _Tales of Forbidden Pony Love_ and was concentrating, horn glowing, hoof moving along the page and at times jumping around. ...
Dash was blushing furiously, and she tried to speak and it just came out squeaky.
"When you soar across the sky, there is nothing more I want than... to see you fly forever, to fly with you..." His voice wobbled, then became more smooth. Something about how he was hovering...
I could hear our foes creeping closer but my hearing wasn't good enough to tell exactly how many. I got ready to throw lightning balls or fire, depending on what these are.
PLEASE BE HURT BY LIGHTNING OR FIRE.
Rainbow Dash looked overwhelmed, and then I realized, she's about to RUN. No, don't run! You'll run RIGHT INTO OUR FOES. I just know it.
"Rarity, she's about to panic and run," I whispered.
Rarity had this goofy smile that surprised me and didn't even reply. ...
Then he kissed her and her hair tried to explode and then she grabbed him and then...
Down three tunnels, six half-man, half-wolf creatures armed with golden blades erupted into sight. They howled and I felt my blood chill. The urge to run for my life was very strong. I'd seen this really good place to hide a ways back.
But then Rarity fired a silver arrow at one of them, hitting him in the hand so he dropped his blade, and Twilight hurled lightning and Pinkie hit one of them in the face with a pie and Applejack and Ivan flanked one of them and began battering him and Rainbow Dash and Soarin' each back kicked one, then released the kiss and CHARGED, sending foes flying, even as Spitfire came down on them.
One of them rushed at us, howling and I moved to block him and guard Rarity, cursing my legs for moving me there, and we clashed sword against sword. He slowly pushed me back with his superior strength, until Ivan suddenly came up behind him and stabbed him in the back. Unfortunately, the wound immediately began to close up to Ivan's frustration. Applejack's magical horseshoes, on the other hand, left their mark on every foe.
"We need to get you a magic weapon," I told him.
"One that I can hold onto, yeah," he said, frustrated. Then he got slammed down by the werewolf, but now I stabbed it in the back and Rarity shot it in the leg. It fled, bleeding and she recovered her arrow.
I helped Ivan back up. "I hope you didn't get cut," I told him.
"I think Fluttershy should be able to treat it in time," he said nervously.
I hope so, as the last thing we need is Ivan going mad and trying to eat us in the middle of the night.
I suddenly wondered if Princess Luna sets off lycanthropes. That could get awkward.
The werewolves finally fled after some more beating and Fluttershy carefully treated us all; you can get infected if a werewolf hurts you, though the swords, hopefully, would not convey it.
We took the three they dropped; they looked valuable and weren't on the dragon's treasure list, thankfully. Then we headed on.
**************
We finally got out of the maze, but the next room made me very nervous. It was rough and irregular in shape with a series of hexagonal platforms hanging down on huge chains from the ceiling, over bubbling boiling hot mud, twenty feet down. You clearly had to jump from platform to platform in order to get across, while not falling in the boiling mud.
"Hah, this one is easy. If you're a PEGASUS," Rainbow Dash said, grinning.
Too easy. "Be careful."
"I'll just..."
Spitfire looked at her.
"Wait quietly for orders," Dash grumbled, then looked at Soarin' and got googly eyed. "Hahaha."
"What are you thinking?" Twilight asked me.
"If this is the Earth Pony route, I'd expect them to make it hard to just fly past things," I told her.
"The Unicorn route didn't," Twilight said thoughtfully.
"It will," Applejack said. "Assuming evil-me had a race with evil-Dash like I did, and that evil-Dash cheats as much or more as the real one..."
"HEY! You started cheating too!," Rainbow Dash protested.
"No cheating," Not-Applejack said with a remarkably... elegant... voice. "A lady does not cheat or break the rules and though my evil twin is a churlish boor, I know she plays by the rules."
Rarity made a happy sigh. "You sound quite delightful. What is your name, madam?"
"I am Apple Blossom, the Element of Elegance," she said with a voice like silk.
Applejack's mouth was wide open.
So was mine. ELEGANCE? Okay, I like Elegance, but you'd expect... what? Then I remembered what she'd told me... this version of her must have stuck it out and become a true Manehattanite lady of sophistication.
"What kind of POWER is Elegance, anyway?" Applejack said, still kind of stunned.
"Marcus darling, would you be kind enough to explain to Applejack, in words of one or two syllables?" Apple Blossom said sweetly.
Rarity snickered and Applejack glared at her.
"Is it Elegance specifically, or the whole complex of behaviors and wealth which gives the upper crust of society power?" I asked Apple Blossom.
"The latter, but I think Elegance is a more beautiful way to put it, and I appreciate beauty, unlike my poor hick clone."
"I am not a HICK! I take care of my family and live NATURALLY," Applejack said angrily. "And don't talk all frou-frou like you! You're living a lie!"
"You simply had no patience and no persistence You hit the slightest obstacles and gave up on your dream. I held to mine and grew into it as time passed. The lie is what you told yourself to convince yourself it was acceptable to give up," Apple Blossom said. "If you were real, anyway. As it stands, you just have implanted memories, sad shadow of me." She sounded very pitying. Then we heard drinking noises. "Glantrian peach wine. Not quite as good as what we make at home but you can't take your best wines to a dungeon."
"I agree completely," Pinkamena said with a Prance accent. "Ze smell of dung and sulfur and mud would ruin ze fine bouquet of your orange brandies. In zat case, zere is no point to opening them in the first place."
"I agree, Madam LeFlour," Apple Blossom said. "Still, if you all make it across this alive, there are two bottles of fine peach wine waiting for you, and glasses. Try not to break them, Applejack, they're expensive."
"I ain't no clumsy filly no more! I ain't spilled wine on myself in YEARS," Applejack said angrily.
"She's trying to rile you so you screw up," I said softly to Applejack. "Don't let her play you."
"You spilled wine on yourself? AHAHAHA!" Rainbow Dash began laughing.
DAMMIT, DASH.
"Be nice," Fluttershy said, then stepped back a step. "If you don't mind."
"I'll show you I can do this!" Applejack said. "And I don't need no damned Elegance to do it!"
"No, wait!" I said.
Too late, Applejack leaped onto the first platform, which swung forward, then onto the next. But soon they were crashing into each other and further, the platforms LEANED when you landed on them, so you started to slide off them. Applejack was crazily good enough to keep leaping around but now she was stuck and had to keep running to avoid falling.
"Spitfire, get under the one she's on, Dash, you and I will stabilize the chain," Soarin' said, and they took off together.
"I believe I said there would be no flying. You had fair warning," Apple Blossom said, then sipped more wine.
Huge spouts of boiling hot mud erupted up, forcing the flying ponies back; they were good enough to dodge it but had to retreat.
Spike now curiously held his hand out over the mud, looking thoughtful. It jetted up and hit his hand but he resisted it and then wiped his hand off. "I can take the heat." He began studying the situation.
"I'm fine! I can do this!" Applejack said, jumping again. "I can beat any test of athletics!"
"I'm surprised you didn't have a test of elegance," Rarity said hopefully.
"The machine does not allow no-win scenarios; there must always be a sliver of hope and Applejack would have no hope there," Appleblossom said, then sipped her wine again. "And it would be unlady-like and gauche to hit someone on their weakest point. Besides intelligence, anyway."
"I HEARD THAT!"
The clanging of the platforms was enough to make me nearly go crazy. I could tell Twilight found it hard to think and Ivan was covering his ears and studying the situation. He looked pretty pissed off.
Pinkie was studying the chains thoughtfully, while the Pegasi all looked frustrated, except for Fluttershy, who was studying the moss and fungi growing on the walls. Rarity kept studying the mud as if it might rise up and render her tainted forever.
"Applejack," Ivan shouted. "Buck the chains! This is just another herd, made of metal! Pinkie, if both of you are on the same platform, you can level it out."
Applejack got a grim smile on her face and now began kicking chains as she leaped around, beginning to impose order on the cacophony and chaos around her. Pinkie leaped out to join her, Spider-Pinkie boots deployed, and they worked on herding the platforms.
"I see your common attunement to foul-smelling farm animals enabled you to help her," Not-Ivan said. He had a bit of a Thyatian accent, which surprised me.
"Would you like some wine, my dear friend Niccolo?" Apple Blossom said gracefully.
"Niccolo?" I said in disbelief. That's a Caurenzian name. They're basically 'budget Thyatis' up in Glantri. Also, MORE crazy.
"Niccolo Aurelianus, at your service, 'Marcus'," he said, making my name wobble in his mouth. You could hear the quote marks. "Baron Niccolo Aurelianus to be precise."
Ivan stared like the world was now ENDING and he had to watch.
"Baron?" I said. Then I remembered the ship.
I wonder if 'Sammy' is a Count.
"Of Novgorod," Niccolo said. "Grand Duke Stefan is always willing to reward service to the realm." I heard an oddly liquid noise, then the sound of him drinking. "As always, your concoctions are superb, my fair lady Apple Blossom."
"Tres magnifique," Pinkamena said with the fake Prance accent. Or maybe it's meant to be New Averoignean. They're similar.
"And you became a Thyatian how?" I asked.
"I think you know all about that," Niccolo said.
FUCK ME.
TRIPLE FUCK ME.
Rarity now looked very thoughtful. Oh bloody hell.
"You can tell me," Spike said, frowning.
Was Twilight listening? She seemed to be watching Applejack carefully, but surely she's not deaf.
"Blood doesn't matter," Niccolo said. "Each person makes themself, whoever their ancestors were. What matters is who you choose to be and what you do with what you have." His voice was smooth and confident; he was clearly a man who had made himself into what he wanted to be and knew what that was. I had to envy him a little. I've remade myself a thousand times, it seems but it never sticks. And it doesn't... I have to always live in fear of being found out. Or those times I don't, it all blows up.
Twilight's breath caught. She's listening. And I remember it too.
"Precisely," Apple Blossom said. There was a bit of an odd liquid noise, then she said, "We looked in the mirror and saw we could be something better and made it so. You both looked in the mirror and ran away. Which is why you're sweating in a room full of boiling mud and we're enjoying mixed drinks and sitting in comfort, enjoying the fruits of our labor."
Ivan looked ready to choke someone. "Because you're parasites! You make me SICK!"
"We are high society. What you think of us does not matter," Pinkamena said with an effort at a deep male voice. There was just a trace of a Prance accent. "It is what we think of you which will shape your reputation and influence. Not that you have any, Ivan, son of Pieter. No one will remember your name." 'He' sounded sad, really.
"We'll remember," Pinkie shouted as she worked on helping Applejack to herd everything. "And I'll tell everyone else and they'll remember! Who cares if some rich snobs remember? They're all stick-in-the muds who wouldn't know fun if it BIT them. Come help us, Ivan! They're not worth it."
I'm not sure what exactly Ivan can do to help them, but he ran and joined them, leaping chain to chain at Applejack's command.
"True elegance exalts, it does not tear down," Rarity said firmly. "You should not look down on others if..."
"You hardly have any right to say that and you know it," Apple Blossom said and took another sip of her wine. "You think the same about Applejack as I do, and you've said it."
Rarity looked rather uncomfortable.
"Don't let her rile you," I said softly to Rarity, hands on her back.
"Perhaps I have," Rarity said softly. "But I can apologize and I know you will not." She now turned and went to try to help Applejack out, though Ivan was soon having to try to keep her from falling in.
So I went to help as well, and so did the pegasi, jumping instead of flying. Eventually, we calmed the swinging platforms and got everyone across.
Despite my irritation with them, I took the wine and passed it to Applejack. "You earned this."
"I am a mite curious," she confessed. "I was too young for alcohol when I was in Manehattan but some of the drinks sounded interesting." She sighed. "I'm glad I didn't grow up and turn into that."
Rarity gently nuzzled Applejack. "I hope I don't make you feel like that," she said. "I am very disappointed in their bad manners."
"Manners ain't about what kind of straw you use or how you do your hair, it's about takin' care of your own and being honest with yourself and others," Applejack said to her. She smiled at Rarity. "We fight sometimes, but you ain't like that. C'mon, we've got to finish this path so we can get the dragon's treasure and get our peace treaty, so we can head back home before Big Mac dies of overwork."
"Agreed," Rarity said, then looked at the hot mud and sighed. "Not a proper mud bath at..." Then she looked at herself. "I am utterly filthy." She sighed. "I could hide it but I would just FEEL filthy."
They all were, hot mud was wafting up in the steam and had stuck to them. To all of us. Ugh, I am going to feel nasty forever now.
Forever!
"Well, we have to press on," Twilight said. "Sorry, Rarity."
"Sometimes, a lady must get a little dirty," Rarity said. "I wonder who these other people with them are, though." ...
"It's Pinkie doing voices," I said. "Evil Pinkie."
"From some game she plays sometimes," Rainbow Dash said. "Damn that Rocky punk."
"You wanna piece of me?" Pinkamena said with a deeper voice and a Bucklynn accent.
Pinkie looked embarrassed for a moment, then said, "I think someone's been playing the game so long she can't stop," she whispered.
"As if you can," Pinkamena said in her normal voice.
Pinkie winced, but then she looked determined. Then her eyes widened. "Ooh, I bet I'll have to make a rock monster laugh or something next! Come on, I want to see what I'm going to do!"
As if she was 'discovering' it. But I laughed. "Let's go!"
************
I stared at the slope. UGH. It was like climbing a mountain INSIDE a mountain. The slope went up into steamy mists which did not look fun either. Further, I could hear movement inside the fog.
"Man, I wish I hadn't lost my climbing gear," Ivan said, then sighed.
"We'll have enough after this to restock," I said.
Twilight looked thoughtful. "Describe it to me."
He listed off his equipment and then she closed her eyes, horn glowing, sweat running down her brow. And then suddenly...
BEAR.
A huge bear appeared, rearing over Ivan and myself and Twilight, with dark black fur with streaks of blue, and with huge claws.
"Climbing gear, not climbing BEAR," Rainbow Dash said, laughing.
"Wait!" Fluttershy said and interposed herself between the bear and Ivan, though she looked scared. But then she collected herself and talked gently to the bear, which now agreed to let Ivan ride it, in return for Pinkie's three jars of honey. Pinkie waved goodbye to the honey sadly, then found a shiny rock and forgot the honey ever existed. "So shiney!"
Twilight looked at me.
"I think it best not to press our luck," I told her. "If I borrow some of Applejack's rope, I can rig something up."
In fact, Applejack was kind enough to let me rig a halter on her and basically secure myself to her with it. She'd help pull me and I'd pull myself as much as I could. "Thanks, Applejack."
"Hey," she said softly. "You were right to worry about Dash earlier. And everything. I guess you have good instincts for this kind of place."
"I know dungeons like you know apples," I told her. "I suppose if humans had cutie marks, I'd have a trap on my leg."
She laughed. "But then you'd have to go naked for us to see it."
"Yeah," I told her. "Okay, I'm ready."
Slowly, we picked our way up the slope. It was very tiring, though Pinkie, Applejack, Dash, and the Wonderbolts had no trouble with it, even on foot.
So we kept going, sweat pouring down us; it got hotter and muggier as we rose. I could not have done it without Applejack. At least not without a lot of stopping.
Once we were halfway up, Fluttershy flopped over. "Tired," she squeaked.
"Okay, five minute break," Applejack said. She'd taken the lead on this.
Twilight stumbled over to me. "So tired."
"Me too," I said to her.
Ivan, to my surprise, was doing stretches next to his bear, which was busy eating up the honey.
"You need more exercise, girl. You can't always book-learn your way through it," Applejack said, though she was breathing a little hard herself.
"I know," Twilight said. "I just have too much to do."
"OOOOOKKKK!!!!" something shouted in the mist. Then barrels began rolling down the slope at us. ...
Twilight fired a lightning barrage, and half of them blew up, then blew up again. ...
We all began dodging wildly and blasting at barrels with fire and arrows and apples and rocks and pies and really, just about anything. When something hit them, they exploded. The ooking noises continued. Stupid gorillas.
"I have a plan," Spike said. "I ride at the front of our group; any barrels that come our way, I mail them to our evil twins. Keep tight behind me and we press up."
"Good idea, Spike, but won't it wear you out?" Twilight asked.
"I can nap in your saddlebags," he said.
Ivan mounted his bear. "Let's go!"
With Spike clearing the way for us with gouts of flame, we rushed up the mountain and into the mists, which Fluttershy parted with a song. Go druids!
Gorillas. Dozens of angry gorillas and a huge stock of barrels.
"LIGHTNING STORM!" Twilight shouted and blasted them and that set off the rest and now there were howling gorillas raining from the sky and the mountainside shook.
Dash, Spitfire, and Soarin' took to the air, whipping up winds to toss the gorillas aside to tumble down the mountainside, then realized they'd broken the rules. But apparently, our foes were too busy snarking or something, and nothing happened.
Until we were nearly at the top; we could see the cave to go into.
And then a purple worm erupted from it. He was huge, maybe twenty feet across and dozens of feet long and he basically swallowed Dash, Spitfire and Soarin' in one gulp, then tried to tunnel away. Applejack lassoed his tail end and Pinkie hitched herself to it, preventing him tunneling back into the rock. Fluttershy tried talking to him but he didn't seem to care.
"The wine! Throw it down to them and Spitfire can use it to augment her trick," Twilight said, looking satisfied.
The wine went down its gullet, then smoke poured out and it now coughed them up and fled.
We now stumbled into the cave for a rest.
****************
It was impossible to get Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire fully clean, though they rolled around on the walls and Rarity sacrificed some cloth to wipe them up. We all had an apple for a snack and eventually managed to muster the energy to rise and continue. Spike was now napping inside Twilight's saddlebags.
Filthy and bedraggled as we were. We emerged into a great bowl, open to the sky. It couldn't be the main caldera or maybe something extradimensional was going on. But there was a huge cool lake of water and on the other side, the exit back into the mountain.
Fluttershy talked to the fish. "They say it's safe, just don't eat their plankton."
No danger of that. We all plunged gratefully into the water to swim.
And swim and swim and swim.
By halfway, the earth ponies were fine, the pegasi were getting by, but the rest of us were exhausted, though Ivan was doing better than I would have thought.
I wanted to sleep forever, but I pressed on, Rarity swimming alongside me.
"I wish I had my diving gear," Applejack said. "It looks interesting down there."
"We're on a time budget," Twilight said.
"What if some of the dragon's treasure is hidden down there?" Dash asked.
"I can let us breath water," Fluttershy said. She smiled brightly. "It helps me visit my fishy friends."
She cast the spell and we dove down and began searching underwater. Eventually, Rarity spotted a gold coin and then some silver and soon we found a patch of earth which had been recently disturbed. Applejack and Pinkie easily dug up THREE chests of treasure. Oh yeah, Dash, you are the best pony!
As we loaded them into saddlebags, the sharks came back for round two.
In freshwater?
Unfortunately for the sharks, the Wonderbolts and Dash are quite mobile in water, and while we all got more tired, it was not too hard to incapacitate this group as well. We climbed out of the water and flopped down, exhausted, on the far shore of the lake and by a group decision, took a group nap.
A decision which consisted of lying there until we fell asleep.
*************
In our sleep, someone installed a nice wooden platform overlooking the lake and three nice soft chairs with attached fishing rods, so you could sit and fish in comfort.
"Why three if only two of us can sit?" Spitfire asked.
"Ivan has enough potion we could all sit!" Pinkie said. "Or we could turn into monkeys, then sit. Hmm... I wonder if I would still have a pink bottom?" ...
"Much as I'd like more fish, it's probably a trap," Ivan said. "I'm too tired to fish."
THAT is tired.
*************
Eventually, we got our butts in motion into the cave, heading downwards gradually. Slowly, it got cooler, which helped and we were a little less filthy from the lake, though I would have liked a full bath. But not an option yet.
I had this horrible feeling we were going to have to schmooze someone while utterly filthy and disgusting.
We stopped in a cave of fungus for lunch, and Rarity, Spike, Twilight, and I ran inventory on the treasure from the lake floor. ALL OF IT belonged to the dragon. If we hadn't gone looking for it, we couldn't have returned it.
"Dash, how did you think to look?" I asked her.
"Just a gut hunch," she said.
"Did your gut wiggle or squiggle?" Pinkie asked.
"We are not going to start looking for twitches in my gut," Dash said flatly.
"But it worked," Pinkie said.
"Yes, but only I can feel my gut anyway," Dash said. "Also, what the hell is going on with Pinkamena and her voices and your game thing?"
Pinkie said, "Pie," and got out a pie and stuffed it all in her mouth.
"Come on, Pinkie, we need to know," I told her.
She licked her lips nervously. "When I was a kid, I didn't have any friends, just my sisters. Sometimes, I'd make up friends to play with. When I get lonely, they come back." She licked her lips nervously. "I don't know if Pinkamena's ever left."
"So it's just ventriloquism," I said.
"And puppetting," Pinkie said, embarrassed. "It's just..."
"She's good with people, though," I said. "I wouldn't think she'd need the imaginary friends."
"She uses them to help her move people," Rarity said, startling me. She'd been busy eating and I'd forgotten she was there. "Like the way 'Rocky' can make Dash get angry."
"He's a CHUMP," Dash said, then slapped her forehead. "Aaargh!"
"Rocky is a teamster from Bucklynn," Pinkie said. "Mr. Turnip sells cabbages city to city."
Why cabbages?
"Madam LeFlour is from Mareis in Prance and she's a high society lady. Sir Lintsalot is a warpony and minor noble from Prance. He has pledged to defend all women," she continued.
Pinkie rambled on; her imaginary friends had long detailed histories, and an idea hit me. "You should write a book, Pinkie."
"Me?" she said, stunned by the idea.
"It could star your imaginary friends and then they'd be busy and happy with promoting themselves and making new friends every time someone reads about them." Rule one, find out how people think.
"Oh that would be wonderful for them. They're good people but don't make friends easily," Pinkie said.
Rarity blinked.
Dash buried her face in her hooves.
"I'm sure Twilight can help you with getting it published," I told her. I know Darokin sells printing presses to Equestria and they probably make their own but I don't know how the printing business is organized. But Twilight either knows or can easily find out. "It would make a great birthday present for Twilight too, if you can get it written in time."
Pinkie squealed happily. I smiled. Favor, curried, check. Info useful for dealing with Pinkamena, check. Now to eat and let my brain begin brewing.
I feel the first throes of a plan coming on.
****************
"You sure that's wise?" Dash asked me once we got going again.
"Maybe," I told her. "Some people write stories so the story will get out of their head and onto the paper. If nothing else, she'll make some bits off it which she can use to throw better parties."
Dash looked at Spitfire, who was upfront with Ivan. "She's a bit of a hardcase, you know."
"I know," I said. "But the Wonderbolts need hardcases too. People who make sure things get done. It's why they're so effective."
"I..." She paused. "You weren't telling Soarin' what to say, right? 'Cause it was kind of the way you talk."
"I promise it wasn't me, though I would have done it if he asked." I put my hand over my heart. "He's a good guy and really likes you. He's just not smooth like I am."
"I'd rather it be his own words, but the smooth language... he thinks I'm beautiful." Her eyes glazed over and she flew gently into the wall. "Oww."
"It's a man's duty to make his woman feel special," I told her. "If you love someone, you use every tool you have to make sure they know how your heart sings when you are with them, how you catch your breath when they walk by, how touching them makes you feel all shivery inside."
Dash was red and shivering a bit herself. "You really are a smooth talker." She paused. "So it wasn't you."
"It wasn't me," I told her. "I swear I am telling the truth. I'd confess if it was me."
"But no one else in this group is smooth like that. I guess Rarity is but she's... elegant instead of poetic." Dash frowned. "Is that right?"
"I'm sure she could be poetic," I told Dash as we still tromped along, slowly descending. Thankfully, there were few traps so far on the downhill run.
Dash nodded, then looked a little nervous. "You're not trying to romance Twilight, right?" ...
"Does Spitfire think that?" I asked.
"I... no, of course not," Dash said frantically.
So yes, she does.
"I am not trying to romance Twilight," I told her. If she was human... though there is the whole possibility of shapeshifting...
But I'd have to tell her the truth and then I would DIE.
"I... umm..." Dash laughed nervously. "You had many girlfriends?"
"Yes," I told her. "Some of them want me dead, some of them... well, family and other things got in the way. Anyway, I hope you and Soarin' will be happy together. Good luck."
"Thanks. That's pretty big of you," she said.
Because you think I have a crush on you.
My brain suddenly clicked. Spitfire must have thought I was trying to chase Dash AND Twilight at the same time. Ahah! Well, this should relieve her fears.
Which reminded me of something. "Dash..." I made a 'come hither' gesture.
Dash hovered close to my head. "What's up?"
"At some point, there will almost certainly be a fake Erik who will try to take advantage of Twilight but will actually be a doppleganger or incubus or some other horrible thing. We have to be ready to stop it."
"What if it's the real thing?" Dash said.
"If we beat up the real Erik, we can apologize. I'm sure he'll understand why we did it."
I hope there's not a Dona Carlotta. I don't want to play the fool but I probably would.
Which means we'll probably find 'Erik' and 'Dona Carlotta' busy making out or something.
Then Twilight and I will rush forward and die together.
Dammit.
**************
We now came round several bends and reached a bridge over a chasm. A single pony in full plate armor with lance rig, stood on the bridge, wearing livery which was golden with a black lance on it. You couldn't be sure if it was male or female, and it spoke with a hollow, echoing voice. "I am the Black Knight. One of your number must joust with me if you are to pass."
"Oh come on, this kind of thing has been old-hat in Equestria since hundreds of years ago!" Applejack protested.
"Nonetheless, none shall pass until one of your number defeats me," he said. "Whoever I defeat will become my servant."
"We don't even have any lances," I said.
"You certainly do not by pony standards," the Black Knight said. ...
Ivan began laughing, even though he's human too.
Most of the ponies just looked confused, but Soarin' and Rainbow Dash both began laughing hysterically and Rarity and Twilight both looked at each other's heads... oh, horn, right.
"Do any of us know how to build a lance rig?" I asked.
"I could do it if I had a hammer and nails and wood and everything," Applejack said, frowning. "Ain't exactly fair with him being all armored up."
"Well, if we had an actual LANCE, we could enlarge someone and Marcus or I could ride them and carry the lance," Ivan said.
I really do not want to face a warpony when wearing leather armor. REALLY. I shivered at the thought.
"Maybe the potion could turn one of us into a lance," Pinkie said.
"It can only make you into something alive," I said. "Unless it's a lot more potent than normal ones."
"What exactly are the terms of this joust?" Rarity asked the Black Knight. "How do you win?"
"We joust on the bridge. Whoever falls off the bridge loses."
"How exactly does the loser survive to serve the winner?" I asked, looking down into the chasm, which plunged into steaming mist.
"The..." The Black Knight paused and looked down into the chasm.
"I can catch the loser," Dash said.
Dammit, Dash, I was going to try and maneuver him into some other kind of contest!
The Black Knight relaxed a little.
"Enlarge this," Rarity said determinedly to Twilight, presenting an arrow to her.
"Wait, you're going to joust him?" I said in surprise.
"I am going to equip Applejack, since she's our best pony for this," Rarity said.
Twilight enlarged the arrow to the size of a lance.
Rarity then took Applejack off around the corner and a lot of clanking noises ensued. When they returned, Applejack was clad in a suit of plate armor which she moved awkwardly in, complete with lance rig.
Where did Rarity get a suit of plate armor? Surely she doesn't carry material to make plate armor. Then again, those saddlebags can hold a LOT of stuff.
It suddenly struck me that you could set up a really nice little bedroom inside one of those things, for camping on the road.
I'll stash that idea for later, I thought.
The Black Knight saluted her, and she saluted back, then they both pawed the ground. I shifted back and forth nervously on my feet. I don't know what we'll do if Applejack fails, though if any of us can take down a warpony in a joust, it's her.
Then it hit me. Rarity wasn't wearing her hat. THAT was where the armor came from. But would it be good enough for a real fight?
It even had Applejack's cutie mark inscribed on the flanks with cut crystal. Nice.
I really hope that armor can take it, or Applejack is going to get badly hurt. And I can tell she knows it but is trying not to show it. I'm pretty good at reading people, though ponies are harder, because only some of their body language is the same. Thankfully, they tend to have fairly human facial expressions. But I can see the tension in how she is moving.
"Everyone sing!" Pinkie shouted.
o/~ Applejack the Fair stood bravely before the Black Knight.
o/~ Applejack the Fair knew it was time for a fight!
o/~ She would strive with all of her might!
o/~ For in her heart, she knew her cause was right!
We all tried to sing along; given Pinkie was making this up as she went along... it wasn't easy.
Applejack pawed the ground, but she seemed to draw strength from our show of support. "You'd better keep your promise," she said to the Black Knight.
"I always keep my promises," he said. Or she. It was hard to tell.
Pinkie suddenly faltered in her song. She stared at him intently. "Show your face."
"I never take off my helmet when battle is immanent," he said firmly.
"Are you Sir Lintsalot?" Pinkie asked, hand on her hips.
Rainbow Dash made a strangled noise and I said, "Isn't he someone you made up?"
"Just because I made him up doesn't mean he's not real," Pinkie said patiently. ...
"Yes, it is, the brave Sir Lintsalot. I've come to save you from those horrible ponies who mistreat you, Pinkie," he said boldly. ...
"You look so dashing in your armor," Pinkie said, smiling.
"Thank you, Pinkie," Sir Lintsalot said boldly.
"So... there's nothing but lint inside that armor," Dash said hesitantly.
What? Okay, the name is connected, but surely Pinkie wouldn't imagine a knight who was made of lint.
Not even Pinkie.
"I AM NOT MADE OF LINT!," Sir Lintsalot said angrily.
However, I now could see that someone had engraved a pile of lint with a lance on it on the flank of his armor. ...
Maybe he's the weirdest golem ever. And I have seen a golem made out of children's toys and squirrel bones.
Damn Glantrian child wizards.
NEVER EVER agree to babysit in Glantri. Not pets, not children, not ANYTHING.
Darien laughed at me for three hours after that.
Bastard!
"C'mon, Sir Lintsalot, you can let us pass for old time's sake, right?" Pinkie asked, with big puppy eyes.
He shuffled his feet nervously. "I'm sorry, but the Princess has ordered me on my honor to defend this bridge."
"What Princess?" I asked curiously.
"Princess Marjorie the Wise," he said.
"You're supposed to serve Princess Celestia!" Pinkie said, clearly outraged.
Sir Lintsalot shrank back a bit. "I serve Countess Pinkamena and through her, Princess Marjorie the Wise, who the Elements of Power serve."
I have never heard of a 'Princess Marjorie'. The name sounds vaguely Glantrian. Isn't it an herb or something?
Then again, if Sir Lintsalot is made of lint, maybe she's made of herbs.
Maybe they're ALL golems. We've only actually seen Cruisin' with our own two eyes.
"Princess Marjoram?" Twilight asked in confusion.
Marjoram! That's the herb.
"MarjorIE," Sir Lintsalot said firmly. "She is beautiful and wise and strong. Now, Sir Applejack, we must joust."
"But... I can't stand to see two of my friends fight each other," Pinkie said, agonized.
The showdown with the Elements of Power is really going to be ugly for her, I see.
"I cannot break my oath," Sir Lintsalot said, pained.
Pinkie began vibrating and her tail shaking and her hair going crazy. This didn't bode well.
"He's just a pile of lint, Pinkie," Rainbow Dash said.
"Piles of lint are people too!" Pinkie shouted. ...
We're all going to be in trouble if piles of lint have the rights of people.
Spitfire said, "Pinkie, if we don't get past him, we can't recover the dragon's treasure. Then we break our promise to him and he will start raiding Equestria again. What do you expect us to do?"
"I am honor-bound to joust anyone who uses this bridge," Sir Lintsalot said firmly.
"Do we have to use the bridge to cross this chasm?" I asked. Always think outside the box.
Because the box is full of scorpions.
"DUH," Rainbow Dash said, slapping her face. "We can just fly across it."
"There will be no flying anywhere," Pinkamena said. "You do this the Earth Pony way or you fail. Namely, you fail, because you're a failure, Dash."
"I won the Junior Flyer competition! I AM NOT A FAILURE!" Rainbow Dash shouted.
Pinkamena's failure to reply made Dash and Soarin' grin broadly.
Pinkie studied the chasm. "I think we can jump it."
"I'd have to take the armor off, but yes," Applejack said.
"I can jump it," Dash said.
"Me too," Soarin' said.
"Ivan and I are unlikely to make that jump," I said, frowning.
"Or me," Fluttershy said weakly.
"I think I can do it," Twilight said. "But I'm not sure."
"If Rarity shot arrows across and... I guess rope bridges wouldn't work well for ponies, though," I said, frowning.
"Or Pinkie could walk on the ceiling with her boots to carry rope across," Applejack said. "But yes, some of us couldn't handle a rope bridge any more than they could handle jumpin' it."
"We could maybe rig a winch and swing people across," I said.
"You all are even more a pack of cowards than I thought," Pinkamena said. "Running away from one pony."
"I am not runnin' away," Applejack protested. "I just ain't getting in a fight if I don't have to."
Pinkamena began making chicken noises; Pinkie began making chicken noises, until she saw Dash glaring at her and stopped, laughing nervously. "But it's fun," Pinkie mumbled.
Applejack frowned. "I ain't no chicken!"
Suddenly it hit me. There's some way to make monsters with this place. Pinkamena made her imaginary friends into REAL beings. But they're shaped by her imagination which is why they sound like her doing funny voices. Or in this case, sound weird and hollow. Or maybe they're shadow creatures, half-real, half-illusion. That would fit quite well.
I sidled over to Pinkie. "Who is Sir Lintsalot's greatest enemy?" I whispered to her.
"Sir Malfeasance the Sockasen," she whispered. "He once kidnapped me and tried to force me to marry him, but Sir Lintsalot rescued me and he swore revenge on Sir Lintsalot."
"What does he look like?" I whispered.
"He's a black stallion with eyes of flame and he laughs evilly all the time. And he wears dull red socks like Father likes to wear when he has boots on."
"With his boots?" I asked.
"Sir Malfeasance just wears the socks because Father got mad if I played with his boots," Pinkie whispered.
"I have a plan," I told her.
I got everyone to huddle, then told them about Sir Malfeasance. "So Twilight disguises herself as Malfeasance with the hat, lures him away, the rest of us cross the bridge, she teleports to us," I said.
"That's pretty dangerous for Twilight," Spike said, frowning. "Let me do it."
"The hat won't turn you into a pony and you can't teleport yourself," I said.
"I could try and mail myself," he said stubbornly.
"I can probably disguise myself better, I know Sir Malfeasance the best," Pinkie said.
"But you can't teleport," I told her.
"I can run on the ceiling where he can't reach me to get back," she said.
"I can just joust him," Applejack said. "Pinkamena is likely to see through any clever tricks, anyway."
I slapped my forehead. "Twilight, you need to send Celestia a letter to send HIM a letter saying she needs his help defending Canterlot. He's pledged to the defense of all ladies, right?"
"Oooh," Twilight said. "Spike, take a letter."
We came out of the huddle once it was sent and Applejack got in position.
Wink the letter appeared by Sir Lintsalot, who read it. "Oh no! I must immediately go to the defense of Canterlot!" He charged off the way we came. "Celestia, I am coming!"
"What are you doing? Come back here!" Pinkamena shouted.
We ran across the bridge before she could summon him back, and headed off hurriedly down the hallway, Applejack changing back to normal. I carried Rarity's giant arrow for her until the spell on it wore off.
Trick won't work twice, but we'll probably have to fight him again later anyway, which worries me.
If Pinkie's four friends are real, or even just strong shadow creatures, then they will give our foes an edge I'm not sure how to counter.
Dammit.
************
"I could have taken him," Applejack said.
"Maybe. He's a stallion and an Earth Pony, so he is likely so strong it makes me feel pain just to think about it," I told her. Four, just FOUR Earth Ponies is enough to pull a train that must weigh tons. "And we don't know how strong that armor was."
I imagined Applejack getting impaled and felt my lunch try to come up. I took a swig from my waterskin and my stomach settled. Dammit, caring about people sucks.
It just makes you worry endlessly, as if I didn't have enough to worry about, like how Celestia is probably going to turn me into a new star for the heavens.
"Twilight, you'd know this. Has anyone verified whether the Procopian or Vellustian theories of stellar origin are true?" I asked her. Procopius, a Thyatian philosopher believed stars were giant burning lumps of what he called 'Procopian matter', a substance which burns forever for poorly explained reasons. Still, his flawed theory can explain planetary motion. Vellustia argued that ALL stars are like the 'sun' of the Hollow World, namely tiny gateways to the Elemental Plane of Fire, through which fire and light spill out. Pure fire, however, cannot exert enough gravity to keep planets from just flying off in a straight line. It would, however, explain why they normally don't go out, except for unusual things like supernova, which are when the gate blows up.
"You left out Thyrsus of Millenia's theory," Twilight said pedantically.
"I didn't know that one," I told her.
"He believed they were monuments erected by the Immortals to honor those who strove for Immortality and either succeeded or failed. This led him to speculate that the destruction of Blackmoor happened due to a failed attempt at Immortality, as a star appeared in the heavens as the Great Rain of Fire began," she continued. "Since no known Immortal exalted at that time, he concluded it a sign of a failed immortal, who was honored anyway."
"Honored for setting the planet ON FIRE?" I said in disbelief.
The Great Rain of Fire is poorly understood. The Blackmoorians found some sort of 'ship of space' which had secret technology they combined with magic to create a really powerful civilization. Then one day fire rained from the sky and the planetary axis shifted, burying them under the polar ice cap. This is the Great Rain of Fire.
"Also, didn't Anibaxus of Haven establish that it was the detonation of Utherite near the surface or in storage which caused the Great Rain?" I said. Or at least, it's the leading theory. Utherite was a shiny black rock which contained magic. Once you took all the magic, it turned into Sablestone, a dull black rock you can burn; it's a very powerful fuel. Dream Valley has a lot of Sablestone which they extract and sell. They also pick out small bits of Utherite that didn't detonate; it sells for REALLY big money.
"And it could be treated as a subset of the Vellustian theory, explaining why the gates are created," Twilight said. "But I did spend a while trying to line up stellar data and Immortals. But I couldn't get enough data." She sounded very disappointed.
"I would think you'd know where stars came from, Twilight," Rarity said, sounding surprised. "Given your interest."
"Celestia is not allowed to talk about it, and nopony has ever gone out to see for themselves," Twilight said. "We do know they have planets and that some of those planets have green humans."
"Really?" I said. "I thought the Blackmoorians found a non-human ship."
We continued to banter as we made our way down the hallway as Ivan looked out for trouble up ahead with Rarity and as I kept distracting myself.
The tunnel opened up into a huge greenhouse, probably several acres across. Holy cow, this is big. It was full of orange trees. Big, juicy oranges. I felt my mouth water. High above us, there were several dozen tiny crystal spheres, hanging on chains from the ceiling; they glowed with sunlight, enabling the trees to grow here.
At the far end of the room was a huge gate of stone with an elaborate mechanism connected to huge empty buckets high in the air. If you filled them up, the gate would open. Classic pony engineering. Or dwarven.
By the entryway, there were two dozen large baskets, suitable for fruit carrying.
"So we have to buck the oranges and fill the buckets in order to go on? That's EASY," Applejack said.
"Even for an unlettered country hick, it would be easy," Apple Blossom said.
'Would', she says. I smell trouble.
"Of course, La Cosa Nostradamus also wants your oranges, and they won't take no for an answer," she said sorrowfully.
Two dozen bulldog-like humanoids now entered from the north entrance, armed with bats, chains, silver knuckles, and maces. "Youse ponies had better move along, see, these oranges are ourses and we're gonna take 'em and sell 'em for BIG BUCKS," the biggest said.
"You're going to buy deer with them?" Pinkie said. ...
"He means bits," Applejack said to Pinkie. "It's Bucklynn slang."
"They're gonna murderize you all!" 'Rocky' shouted over the intercom. I noticed he was not among the... well, maybe he IS a Bucklynn Bulldog.
"Rocky!" Pinkie shouted. "You're not supposed to cheer for criminals! You're a good boy!"
"Sorry, Pinkie, they're old pals from the old days, see, and seeing them, I just kinda got overwhelmed and all." 'Rocky' sounded apologetic.
"Don't feel bad," Pinkamena said to him. "Pinkie's not your real friend, I am. I won't abandon you to go run around with mares." Her voice was soothing and 'Rocky' made happy noises. This was not as creepy as it would have been if I wasn't sure 'Rocky' wasn't ENTIRELY her talking to herself.
Still creepy.
"I am your friend, Rocky!" Pinkie said. "You should come to my parties! You know you're welcome!"
Rainbow Dash buried her face in her hooves.
"Sorry, ma'am, we have to rough up your friends," the big bulldog said to Pinkie. "I'm Barky Bark and these are my boyz, the Munchy Bunch. Boyz, leave the lady alone. We're here for the hillbilly, anyway."
"I am not a HILLBILLY," Applejack said angrily. "I am a farmer!"
"She's a GREAT farmer," Pinkie said.
"Applejack, Pinkie, Ivan, you three buck oranges," Twilight said. "The rest of us will keep the Yancy Street Gang off you."
Apple Blossom laughed very softly. "This should be entertaining, Madame LaFlour."
"Thugs versus thugs? It is beneath us, really," Madame LaFlour said. "But this is your soiree, so I bow to you."
"Cabbages are better than oranges OR apples," Mr. Turnip said.
"So many tasty cabbage recipes," Pinkie said, then got a basket and she and Applejack started bucking.
Ivan got some rope, made a sling for a basket and began climbing a tree.
"What?" Apple Blossom said, sounding surprised. "What on earth are you doing, Ivan?" ...
"Picking oranges! You think I'm up here for fun?" he said irritably.
"But..."
We could hear whispers but not what was said clearly.
"Oh. Carry on. Humans are strange."
"Says the half-assed fake Applejack," Ivan said as he started picking oranges.
"She is the fake!"
While they bickered over who was fake, the rest of us formed up to defend them. Fluttershy began a song and I positioned myself to cover her, then detonated my flame spell, sending several scurrying. Twilight hurled lightning balls at them, and they got blasted, tumbling across the grass.
Spike jumped up, kicked a gangster in the face, then grabbed his chain and swung him around with it and threw him. I remembered the chair. Oh help me, the CHAIR.
Rarity arced an arrow around to nail one of our foes in the ass and he now ran away yelping like a puppy.
The grass now grew up, grabbing several of the gang in place and holding them fast as they struggled. "Be nice," Fluttershy said to them. "Violence is bad."
Pinkie and Applejack were working hard, kicking oranges into baskets. To my surprise, Applejack wasn't any faster than Pinkie and it seemed to anger her a lot.
"Apples and oranges as they say, my evil twin? Of course, you probably can't read to know that," Apple Blossom said cheerfully.
"I can READ, dammit! I went to school same as everyone else!"
"I didn't get to go to a school," Ivan mumbled.
Applejack and Pinkie both faltered at that, staring.
"So you're actually stupider than my evil twin, how sad," Apple Blossom said. "I am versed in fine literature and the classics, thanks to graduating with honors from Madame Silver Fountain's School For Young Fillies of Distinction."
"Madame Silver Fountain is a stuck up old bat," Applejack said angrily. "And that school was boring."
"Because you didn't take it seriously like I did. But then, you ran away without even hardly trying," Apple Blossom said. "Better buck faster, it's all you can do."
Applejack and Pinkie had to kick their oranges up into the big weight baskets; the gate now opened just a little bit. Ivan was still trying to fill his basket. "Dammit, this is taking forever," Ivan said.
"Just do your best, Ivan," Applejack said. "I know you'll do your best for us." Then she ran back to bucking.
Dash, Soarin', and Spitfire swooped through the enemy ranks. Thankfully, there was no 'no flying' rule for this fight. Or if there was, our foes forgot to enforce it.
Two Bulldogs rushed at us and Rarity leaped up and kicked him in the chest, knocking him down, then hit him in the ass with an arrow and he ran away, yelping. She looked satisfied.
I was less satisfied because I was being attacked by Barky Bark. Worse, he was chanting some song about how awesome he was.
o/~ Bad Vibrations is what youse guys gonna feel,
o/~ When I kicks youse with my heel!
I cannot deny it felt bad when he kicked me in the face, but I cannot deny that he felt bad when I turned my sword into a mace and smacked him in HIS face. I would have just hacked him up but, you know, sentients, ponies, you know the drill.
Plus, there was a certain satisfaction in seeing him howl.
There was much less when he pushed my mace aside with his own, then knocked me down, then hefted me and threw me at a tree.
However, I had a certain satisfaction in then literally setting his ass on fire. Unlike the others, he knew to stop, drop, and roll, or maybe he just fell down in pain.
Ivan grimaced, then said, "Well, fuck, desperate times, desperate measures. If Asterius can do it..."
What?
Ivan dropped out of the tree, then closed his eyes for a few seconds, while fumbling in his pocket. "Please don't let me regret this," he mumbled.
"Live life without regrets!" Pinkie said, though she managed to buck two oranges onto her head. "But with better aim!"
Ivan muttered something, then poured some of the polymorph potion into his palm and stoppered the bottle and stashed it in his pocket. Okay, that's a weird way to drink it. Then he drank it clumsily; a little of it got on his shirt. He howled, stumbled, and then turned into a pony stallion. ...
He was a palomino: golden coat and a white mane and tail. I would have expected him to have brown hair, though his white mane was as curly as his hair normally is. His eyes were still brown. He was noticeably bigger than the mares present, though still within the range you'd call 'pony'.
Applejack stared at him in surprise. Pinkie said, "EARTH PONIES FOREVER!" and ran to hurl oranges into the buckets.
Pony-Ivan tried to give Applejack a thumbs up but managed to knock himself down instead. He got up, laughing ruefully, then turned and KICKED the tree.
The good news: he harvested the whole tree at once.
The bad news: oranges went EVERYWHERE and only about a third fell in his basket.
"Damn, nice power, poor control," Applejack said.
"I doubt the potion understands the finer aspects of bucking," he said.
Twilight said, "I'll come help you if we can ever get these dogs to give up!" She blasted more with lightning. They fled, but after a bit, they came back stubbornly.
"Once a bulldog sinks his teeth in something, he never lets go!" Barky Bark said. "Pulverize 'em, boyz!"
"Marcus, WHY DO YOU SMELL LIKE BACON?" Ivan asked me as he tried kicking the oranges back to his basket.
"I do not smell like bacon!" I protested.
"Oh, is that what he smells like?" Rarity said. "That's... It's some kind of meat thing humans eat, right?" she said. Then she shot another Bulldog in the butt, sending HIM scampering.
And yet they come back for more. Amazingly stubborn creatures.
"Yes, it is; it's typically eaten with breakfast," I told her. Barky Bark and I bashed each other with maces AGAIN and both fell down, though he got up faster, until I whacked his foot.
"What do I smell like?" Fluttershy asked. She now came over to Pony-Ivan and the grass began herding his oranges, helping him recover them.
Pony-Ivan sniffed. "You smell gentle, but I'm not sure how I know what gentleness smells like."
She smiled brightly and continued urging the grass to herd oranges.
Applejack ran over to Pony-Ivan. "Here, watch." She bucked a tree. "Try it like that."
He got a little better on the next one but this clearly was not something easily picked up. He also struggled to get the oranges up into the basket, though Fluttershy helped him.
Barky kicked me into a tree, though now he was limping, and was about to brain me when WHAM, Rainbow Dash hit him from behind and sent him flying. "Thanks, Dash," I said warmly.
"You're welcome!" Then she charged two more.
Rarity clearly wanted to help me but basically, as fast as she sent one running, another would come at her. Damn, these things are persistent.
Spike was busy defending Twilight, and doing a good job of it, punching and kicking any of them that got too close.
Pony-Ivan and Fluttershy were busy herding oranges, Applejack was making good progress, and Pinkie was doing well too. Things were looking up.
Pinkie sang cheerfully as she worked, about sending the oranges to see the king. I am not sure WHAT king. But if it works, it works.
"Barky, Barky, Barky, you have to do better than this, or Uncle will not be very happy at all," Apple Blossom said with her sweet, silky voice. "And you know what happens then."
Sweat now poured down his face. "I am trying to murderize this stupid human, but he ain't dying so easy as you said he would."
"He does seem tougher than Princess Marjorie thought," Apple Blossom said. "I suppose beating a pile of garbage to death with a blunt instrument is not ideal."
"I am NOT garbage!" I shouted.
"I will have to upgrade you to trash," Apple Blossom said. I heard drinking noises. "I can't see what she sees in you."
What who sees in me?
"What I see is a loudmouth with pretensions of grandeur who sends others to do her work for her, while she sits around getting drunk," Rarity said angrily. "You may have an elegant exterior, but there are worms inside your core."
Angry Rarity has such a lovely turn of phrase. I couldn't help but grin broadly, while Barky tried to figure out what Rarity meant. This let me bash him in the shoulder, though he now backhanded me into a tree. Dozens of oranges now fell down.
"Thanks, Barky!" Pinkie said.
He took his bowler hat off and bowed to her. "Yer welcome, Lady Pinkie."
Then he tried to beat me to death but I threw myself at his knees and knocked him down.
"I am not drunk; ladies do not get drunk," Apple Blossom said tightly. "Neither do I roll around in the hay with people I just met, unlike you."
What on earth is she talking about? No one has had sex on this mission.
Or if they have, I didn't notice and I am GLAD.
"They just hide like cowards while others fight for them," I shouted at her. "But then, you've always been good at running away. You ran away from working on the farm so you could be a lazy parasite in the city, living off other people's work! And now you're too lazy to come down here and fight your own fight!"
Apple Blossom made a noise, but then she cleared her throat. "Ladies do not get into brawls unless they have no choice." But it was clear my words had stung.
"And it's easy to cook up an excuse when you're a fake lady. You might muss your hair, you might chip your horseshoe, you might scuff your dress. Rarity is a real lady who stands by her friends instead of sending them off to get a beating without her! She's more of a lady than you will EVER be."
Rarity smiled brightly and kicked down a dog who charged her, then punted him across the field. She can be elegant and hand out a beating. I appreciate that.
I could hear Apple Blossom's teeth grind. Oh yes. Barky hit me again; I couldn't fight on two fronts at once well, but it was worth it.
"Sammy!" Apple Blossom shouted. "I need you."
"Sorry, I'm busy helping Dawn Gleaming compare star births with the raising or failure of Immortals! We'll be done in an hour or so, though! But I can't let my cuddle-huggums down by running off!" Sammy shouted.
Twilight twitched and nailed more Bulldogs with lightning balls.
'Cuddle-huggums'? Is he brain-damaged? If I was dating Twilight, I would call her something smooth, like 'maiden of the night sky' or 'genius of ancient lore' or 'regal as...' Okay, dammit, you can't call her regal, even though her coat color totally sets her up to be compared to imperial purple. Though in Alphatia...
ANYTHING other than 'Cuddle-huggums'. If anyone is a bad copy, he is.
I got smacked by Barky again. I can't focus because of that idiot and his terrible, terrible terms of endearment!
I finally understand why there are so many stories where clones can't stand each other.
A chime went off. Oh bloody hell.
The ground began to tear open and now shambling human corpses began to rise from their graves.
OH FUCK ME. I was starting to wonder why this path wasn't 'marathon' or 'get filthy and exhausted' as its theme.
There is, however, one good thing about the undead. No one is going to get mad if I go apeshit on them.
"Take him apart, Barky!" Rocky shouted.
"You want some? Come down and GET SOME," Rainbow Dash shouted.
"Dash, cover me so I can use a spell on the dead!" I shouted.
She powerdived Barky; they crashed into a tree which broke in half, dropping all its oranges, then on across the room; she peeled out, letting him slam into the wall. WHAM.
He feel down, then put his hat back on. I applaud that. "The little girl wants to rumble? Barky Bark is happy to oblige you, girly! But these claws are sharp!" he said, swinging his mace.
"It's BLUNT," Rainbow Dash said, oddly pedantically.
"Whuteva!" he said and began trying to smack her as she dodged him.
"Rarity, join your abilities with Twilight," I told her. "Twilight, the fire spell!" I now engaged the bulldog which was attacking Rarity, giving her cover to join Twilight.
Vanderhoven's Spiraling Fiery Burst causes fire to spiral outwards from the blast point you choose, dodging you but not necessarily your friends. Unless you combine someone with huge precision (Rarity) and power (Twilight). Together, they sent fire snaking through the ranks of our foes, dodging allies and trees and spiraling out to set all the undead on fire.
Fire with a pattern oddly like pretty lace.
Oh yeah.
That was enough for the dogs, who could see they escaped burning by Twilight and Rarity's grace only. Throwing that much fire tired Twilight but with the undead burning and the bulldogs fleeing, we were victorious.
"As always, ladies, you were magnificent," I said to them.
Why is Spitfire giving me funny looks? Going to have to figure that woman out.
"Nice job for a first timer," Applejack said to Pony-Ivan, cantering over to him. She sniffed his nose for some reason. "Like everything, it's practice, practice, practice."
"Thanks," he said. "I just didn't have time to do it the human way." Pony-Ivan sighed.
So much for asking me if I want to make centaurs, I see. Hah!
"So humans smell like bacon," Applejack said thoughtfully.
"Well, he specifically smells like it to me. I can hardly smell him at all normally. I can smell your confidence."
Applejack grinned. "That's me all over."
"Dash smells like that too," Pony-Ivan said, pointing at her with his head.
"Because I AM confident!" she said, grinning.
Pinkie now jumped on Pony-Ivan, knocking him down. He staggered to his feet and she said, "Now we must sing our song!"
"We never FINISHED our song," Pony-Ivan said.
"Improvisation is best!"
They soon began all singing a different version of the same song, which I had to laugh at.
Rarity sniffed my hand. "So that's bacon," she said, as if recording the idea.
"I haven't had bacon since the ship," I mumbled, then scritched her behind the ears as she made little happy noises. "I must admit I like seeing you can be elegant and hold your own in a scrap," I told her. "Don't listen to those fools."
"You look good in a fight too, Marcus," she said. "I wish I could take a bath and a nap, though." She sagged just a little, and leaned on me.
I worked behind her other ear. "Yes, so could I, but there is no rest for us until we finish this."
I hope Twilight will have enough strength for the last throwdown. As I am... dog-tired. Heh.
She was smiling at us, though she turned to Spike when she noticed me noticing her noticing us.
Spike, on the other hand, glare of death.
I'd better guard my hands tonight.
"So how long until you turn back?" Applejack asked.
"I'm not sure. I drank about a palm-full... Hey, Twilight, you have any idea?"
"Depends on the power of the wizard who made it," Twilight said.
Which we don't know because we found it in the dungeon.
"I expect Keraptis made it, so it would be strong," Pony-Ivan said.
Twilight nodded. "Though it may have been made by someone who raided this place and lost it or died here."
We all frowned at that thought.
Pony-Ivan thought for a moment, then said, "Marcus, you're going to have to take point. I can't do anything about traps except look at them with no hands."
"I will be your hands," Rarity said. "Twilight, isn't there some trick for magnetizing a needle?"
"I have a compass if you need one."
"I need you to magnetize a couple of my needles for use with trap disarming."
"Sure," Twilight said. It's a very easy spell.
Rarity soon had her kit assembled and we got going.
***********
"You all have a distinct smell in addition to your temporary ones," Pony-Ivan announced as we made our way down the next tunnel. He now closed his eyes. "I can tell where you are, even like..." Bump. "But not the wall."
This got many laughs and Applejack said, "Eyes open, Ivan," though she laughed.
"And I have a broader field of vision, I think," he said.
It's like he's driven to comment on everything he does now.
There is probably going to be a party where we will have to liven it up or something, for one of the challenges. And given we haven't had an evil thing pretending innocence yet, that's definitely going to be happening.
We came around a corner and came to where the hallway ceiling soared up to sixty feet. And then it deadended, with the hallway continuing fifty feet up. "Oh bloody hell," Pony-Ivan said, looking at his hooves. "I hope we don't have to retreat quickly."
Rainbow Dash flew up and secured a piton for me and a rope. I climbed up, then the Pegasi began ferrying everyone. We were able to head on, but now I was nervous. More nervous, okay? This clearly meant we'd have to run from something but wouldn't be able to.
Distantly, a bell chimed five times. FIVE TIMES? If once is a horde of wandering monsters... EEEEE!!!!!
"It's just a bell," Applejack said. "If you turn into a pony at some point, your name is definitely going to be Nervous Nellie."
"Once is a horde of wandering monsters. Now multiply by FIVE," I said.
Applejack grimaced. "Okay, good reason for nerves."
We pushed down the hallway to a four way intersection. "Another maze, I suspect," I told them.
We went left. Always go left. This went fifty feet, hooked another left, then widened out into a forty foot wide room with pictures of Ivan dying horribly on the walls. Human-Ivan, that is. Pony-Ivan grimaced.
There was a staircase up in the middle of the far wall, ten feet wide, which climbed forty feet to double doors. To the right of the staircase, there was a pile of miscellaneous garbage tucked into the corner, about eight feet across and two feet high. On the ceiling over it was a set of arcane runes.
"Okay, no one move," Pony-Ivan said. "Marcus, creep up and check the stairs. Twilight, check the rune. Rarity, stand by me. Spitfire, can you fly up by the doors but don't touch them?"
"Of course," she said, flying up and hovering.
Twilight said, "It's a teleportation receiver You teleport to it. But of course, you'd fall unless you can stick to it, which makes it seem weird. Maybe it's for pegasi?"
"On the Earth Pony path? I doubt it," Pony-Ivan said.
I moved up carefully. "The stairs turn into a slide, there's a pit-trap at the base." I triggered it and it dropped sixty feet onto a teleport sigil. Twilight carefully moved up. "It links to the one on the ceiling."
She lifted the garbage with her magic. "And that has another teleporter which ALSO connects to the one over it, so you fall, hit, teleport, fall, hit, teleport, ad infinitum." Twilight rubbed her forehead. "Vicious."
Twilight said, "Spitfire, I will catch you if something makes you fall. Open the doors."
Huge winds now tried to slam Spitfire down but with Twilight's help, she made a controlled descent. The wind erupting out of the tunnel beyond also would have pushed people down the stairs, which now turned into a slide.
"Marcus, you're going to have to climb up and disarm it, given I can't climb these smooth walls," Pony-Ivan said, frowning.
"Twilight, you'd best be ready to catch me," I told her.
She nodded and I clambered up. I got blown out three times before I disarmed the trap. Then the Pegasi helped everyone up, though Applejack was able to just trot up the slide.
What followed: pit trap, dart trap, pit trap with arrow trap, spear trap, fire trap, acid jets trap, and then...
Applejack had to simply kick open a door to get us through it. Beyond was a thirty foot cube of a room; there was a staircase which rose ten feet to the middle of the right wall, and a tunnel exiting the room in the middle of the far wall, ten feet off the ground. A shimmering violet curtain hung down in front of it from the top of the room. Violet fungi, hideous stuff, it rots your flesh when you touch it. At ground level, under this, there was an archway but it only went a short distance before hitting solid stone.
In the center of the room was a ten foot circle of stone with a series of poles four feet high sticking up along the edge. A similar set projected down from the ceiling.
Twilight saw the fungi. "That is VERY dangerous, do not get near it. Marcus, help me burn it."
Burning didn't work to my annoyance. Neither did lightning or even Twilight's water blast spell.
"Gotta solve this the Earth Pony way," Applejack said. "Ivan, got any idea?"
Pony-Ivan paced around the poles. "Oh, I get it. We rotate the room with the poles. Top tier with the top poles, bottom tier with the bottom poles."
"How would earth ponies get to the top tier to rotate it?" Applejack asked.
"Lasso them and pull?" he said. "Let's try that first as it's probably the hard one."
With a lot of effort, they slowly rotated the top into place. With the ropes, we could all help. This moved the violet fungi away from our exit. Then we did the ground level.
It was easier, but it also meant the alcove on the bottom now opened into a tunnel. A tunnel full of hungry spectral undead, who now charged out to meet us.
Pony-Ivan, unfortunately, had to fight with his hooves, which left him vulnerable to their powers. He quickly ended up paralyzed to his frustration.
I changed my sword to an axe and began hewing undead, sending spectral body parts flying. It was quite satisfying.
Twilight chewed through their ranks with lightning and Spike with fire. Applejack began lassoing them and throwing them around to people who could safely hit them.
Pinkie now began a song and soon had a dozen of them dancing with her. She then led them off into the traps, which we now heard going off on them.
Soarin' and Spitfire's uniforms let them safely attack the undead and they began kicking them around. Dash had to be more cautious, whipping up winds to fling them around into each other and break up any groups which threatened the rest of us.
Fluttershy slowly dragged Pony-Ivan to safety and cast a spell to unparalyze him.
Finally, we carved down the last of them; they had no hope of beating us, but now we were all more tired and worn down. Which is what our foes are hoping for.
I am NOT looking forwards to encountering the Elements of Power when we're all tired and exhausted.
The good news: A large chunk of the dragon's hoard was tucked into a room behind here. We now had half of it. Half of the stolen part of the hoard; I expect he has a lot more at home.
I just hope we didn't miss some earlier in the dungeon.
***********
We now passed down a staircase and through a door labeled 'Servants' entrance'. Now the hallway was tiled in elaborate geometric patterns of the kind they like in Ylarum and in parts of Thyatis. Everything was very clean and indeed, it was like we'd wandered into the back areas of some Thyatian villa.
I could smell rose-scented perfume. The ponies all paused and looked overwhelmed. If I can smell it, it must be really strong for them.
Then Pony-Ivan made a noise and said, "And now the potion is wearing off." He yelled loudly, stumbled, fell down and turned into himself on the floor. His human self. "Well, that was a lot different than I expected," he said, then rose, wobbling.
"You made a good pony, Ivan," Applejack said warmly.
"How do you focus with all those smells?"
"You get used to it," she said, then looked around. "You were thinking we might have to go to a party, Marcus?"
"Something social, as I expect Pinkamena will want us to look like idiots in a social situation."
"Sounds fun!," Pinkie said cheerfully.
We now came to three doors, though the hallway went on. One was labeled 'humans', the second 'ponies' and the third 'dragons'. They turned out to be bathing areas with fluffy towels, bathrobes, soap, and a series of rooms for bathing.
"Dammit, this has to be a trap with sea monsters in the soaking tub," I said. "But I want a bath SO MUCH."
"A little dirt never hurt anyone and we can't trust it," Ivan said.
Rarity stared longingly at the pony bathhouse.
"Well, if we all bath together, instead of some people HIDING," Applejack said, "It ought to be safe."
"I smell donuts in the dragon baths," Spike said.
Ivan looked at me. He doesn't care if they see him naked, but I will DIE.
"Well, at the very least, we ought to snag those donuts for Spike," I said, stalling for time.
Spike looked at me, clearly suspecting I was up to something, yet wanting *donuts*.
"Look, you can just wrap a towel around yer groin and join us," Applejack said. "As if we'd never seen someone's groin before."
Twitch, twitch, twitch. If it falls off... DEATH DEATH DEATH.
Spitfire was giving me the eye and my heart considered whether to just explode and get it over with.
"Look, Spike and I can bathe with them," Soarin' said. "Then there won't be any need to panic, right?"
There was no excuse I could give which would not end in fire.
Soarin' may or may not know about Erik's tattoo. I do not know for absolute sure Celestia knew and Twilight would have no reason to tell the Wonderbolts.
But he's likely to say 'Hey, guys, Marcus has a sweet tattoo.' But if I use a little caution...
"Really, they should be with us, just to be sure," Rarity said. "Not to denigrate you of course, Soarin', Spike."
Applejack looked at Rarity, then snickered for some reason. "Well, well, I see someone can change their opinion when it suits them."
"What?" Rarity said, a little flustered. "It's for safety's sake. I greatly appreciate Marcus' desire for propriety but given we heard five wandering monster bells and none of them have shown up, and well, when are we more vulnerable than when taking a bath?"
"I'm thinking maybe we should skip the bath, tempting as it is even for me right now," Applejack said.
"I could really use a bath," Fluttershy said. She sounded quite worn out.
"How about if we search all three for traps, monsters, death, and so on together," I said. "Because these might be full of DEATH."
We did the 'dragons' one first. It was HUGE. Big enough to hold even a grand wyrm. In fact, I was disturbed by evidence of recent use; wet towels, used soap, turned over buckets, water splashed on the floor. The soaking tub was practically an artificial pond.
"There's a dragon around," I said.
"Probably Marquetta," Spike said angrily.
"No bath," Applejack said. "We search them for anything else we need to know but no bathing if there are dragons about."
We found a box in the corner with Sablestone in it. There was a hidden dumbwaiter next to it and a secret door to stairs down. "Ain't no dragon bigger than Spike gonna fit down this," Applejack said.
A little bigger. Anything ogre sized or smaller could use this tunnel. We carefully descended and found that there was a set of furnaces; you could burn sablestone and heat the water in the giant tub above. Further, we found a chest down here; once Ivan disarmed it, it had more of Vermicoritax's treasure, including his complete collection of Darokinian Chancellor coins; the Darokinians issue a new gold coin design each time a new Chancellor is elected; he had every single one plus all the major weird variants, like the one which was half copper and half gold and ended up kind of orange.
"I'm wondering how the dragons get down here to turn their hot water on," Applejack said.
"Probably servants," Twilight said.
Spike nodded. "Or any children."
And then I felt a powerful pulse of magic. "Erik of Vestland, now you di... no one is here," a man said loudly; we could hear him only dimly. ...
"Nice accuracy on that teleport, now we're stuck in the middle of White Plume Mountain and there is no sign of our target!" another said angrily.
Six bells now chimed in quick succession.
A woman said, "What the hell is that?"
"Erik? They're looking for Erik? He's here?" Twilight said frantically.
I put a finger to my lips, pointing up, then making a throat slitting gesture.
"We can't kill them," she said, stunned.
I gave up. "No, I mean they may kill us, depending on if they want witnesses," I whispered. "And don't talk loudly, or they'll hear us."
She looked relieved. "I'm sorry, Marcus, I know you wouldn't advocate that, I just misunderstood." She sounded very embarrassed.
"If they're looking for Erik of Vestland, Soarin' and I should talk to them, given he is the one who stole the Pearl of the Water Elves of Minrothad."
"Is Celestia looking for him?" I said nervously.
Twilight frowned.
"We're under orders to bring him to her alive if we encounter him," Spitfire said, studying me in a way that made me want to immolate myself.
Which she could help with, I now knew.
"Anyway, we can talk to them, find out who it is, and since we're not Erik, either it will be fine or we can outrun them," Soarin' said.
"I could...," Dash began.
"You're too recognizable," Spitfire said. "Stay here, we'll talk to them."
We waited nervously, while they went up.
"Hey, I met you at the embassy. Corporal Cufen, right?" I heard Spitfire say.
Ivan and I both goggled.
"You know him?" Twilight asked.
"I knew a Cufen," I lied. It was the name I had when I met Ivan and Helga. A long time ago.
"Everyone, this is Spitfire and Soarin' of the Wonderbolts," Cufen said. "You guys looking for Erik again too?"
"We never did find him. But we got reports he was here."
"We had a tracking spell but it malfunctioned and told me he was in two places at once, so I tried to land on one of them and missed both," another man said. "What's down the stairs?"
"Just the access for heating this tub up. By the way, this is a baths for dragons."
"Well, shit," the woman said. "Doran, can you teleport us out?"
"Not unless you want me utterly exhausted," the second man, Doran, said.
"I don't want to waste time trying to search the dungeon," Cufen said. "Teleport us."
I felt magic build and...
"OH SHIT," Doran shouted and then there was silence and a feeling of something messing with the spell.
"Damn, they're not dead, right?" Soarin' said weakly.
"I hope not," Spitfire said, grimacing.
They reunited and Twilight said, "They got intercepted. I don't think teleporting out is an option." She scratched her head. "There is two of Erik?"
AHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
"You can be sure there is some trap here with a fake Erik," I said. "And likely anyone else any of us have ever liked, loved, hated, etc."
I am SO FUCKED. But I can't confess now, though I should.
DAMMIT.
******************
We found two more hidden, trapped chests. Ivan and worked with Rarity, showing her how to disarm them; her fine motor control of her telekinesis makes her well suited to this. And I think she enjoyed it as a puzzle exercise.
"I bet you boys would make marvelous tailors," Rarity said with a wink. "Your fingers are very nimble."
"I have no experience," Ivan said. "But I will take your word for it. You have a definite knack here."
I really ought to learn to make hats, but then I would probably do nothing else BUT make hats.
Combined with our other wind, we now had seventy-five percent of Vermicoritax's treasure. Excellent. Hopefully, we'd find the rest soon, though I suspect a fair chunk of what's left is all over Clarity.
There had been six people and six chimes. Which led us to the theory five people had entered White Plume Mountain the previous time. This was rather a relief.
Though I feared the five were the Thyatians sending a group for me. Also, Twilight kept trying to figure out the two Eriks thing, which worried me. I fear the man detected myself and 'Sammy'.
Dammit.
We now took off down the hallway and came to a small room with two doors, each with a mask etched into it from the Thyatian theater On the left was a comedy mask, on the right, a tragedy mask. Over them was carved 'The Talking Gates. One always lies. One tells the truth. Down one path is a howling army of undead, down the other your fortune. You may ask only one question of each.'
"A logic puzzle? What the hay is a logic puzzle doing on this path?" Applejack asked, frowning.
"This one is EASY," Pinkie said. "So easy it must have a hidden trap."
"It's easy?" Applejack said dubiously.
"Oh come on, the Lay of Marethian has this one, and so do roughly twenty or so other old lays," Pinkie said. "It could be treasure or your girlfriend or boyfriend or your child or a Celestia-in-a-box, but it's always 'DEATH' or 'TREASURE'."
"Ooh, bardic test, then," I said.
"Yes, but anyone who knows this would know I would know it," Pinkie said. "Therefore, there has to be a trick. The howling undead army actually wants to give us pie and the fortune is 'bad fortune'."
"So we reverse it," I said.
"But then, they'd anticipate that I would think that, so they would double reverse it, counting on me psyching myself into the wrong path," Pinkie continued.
"Or it could all be a lie and they both lead to death," Spitfire said.
"This is a mad wizard's dungeon. There's always an out but we have to be cunning," I said.
Pinkie stared at her tail. "Pinkie sense... ACTIVATE!" Nothing happened at all.
Pinkie grimaced. "Pinkie sense SUPER ACTIVATE."
Nothing.
"Search for a third door," Twilight said. Careful study showed that if there was another door, we couldn't find it.
"It could be that the howling undead army is guarding some of the dragon's treasure, so we have to face it. Whereas, treasure for *us* is down the other route," Ivan said.
I find this theory plausible.
"Well, I choose comedy," Pinkie said. "In which case... Doors! Tell me where the rest of Vermicoritax's treasure is!"
The masks moved slightly and looked at each other. "But... we don't know about that," the Comedy mask said. "We're supposed to answer questions about things around here."
"Wrong! The rules don't say that. They say to ask one question and each of you will answer it. It lays NO restriction on the question!" Pinkie said. "Are you CHEATERS?"
"But I can't lie if I don't know the truth!" the Comedy mask said.
HAH!
"I'm going to have to report you to the Better Dungeon Bureau for cheating," Pinkie said. "Spike, take a letter."
He produced pen and ink.
"Dear Princess Bureaucracia, I have encountered two doors who are NOT doing their jobs," Pinkie began.
"I'd do it if I could!," the Tragedy door said.
"I would... wait, no, I... aaargh...," the Comedy door said. "I think I'm supposed to say that I don't want to do my job? That I won't do it? Damn, lying about everything is hard."
"You should say it's easy, I think," the Tragedy door said. "To lie about it."
"Dammit!"
"I need your names, so I can turn you in," Pinkie said sternly.
"We don't have names," the Comedy mask said. "No, wait, I have to say we do have names." He paused. "Right?"
"Yes, while I say we don't have names," the Tragedy mask said reassuringly.
"You're not very good at this," Applejack said to the Comedy mask.
"I can't seem to think clearly for some reason," the Comedy mask grumbled. "Dammit, I needed to say I can think clearly for no reason. Some reason. Urgh, you handle this... no, wait, I have to tell you not to handle it. AAAAAA!!!!"
Applejack paused, then suddenly buried her face in a hoof for a few seconds. "OH."
I blinked. "Wh... OH."
"Element of Honesty, that's me," Applejack said, feeling embarrassed. She concentrated, studying the sign. "It's all a lie. Both paths lead to death."
Man, that's a sweet power, except insofar as it might reveal the truth about me, leading to my death. DAMMIT.
"How do we move forward, then?" Dash asked.
"It's a dead end," I said. "We got the dragon's treasure, though."
Careful searching revealed we'd missed a secret door, which we now opened and headed down this new tunnel.
**************
As we headed down the new tunnel, Spike coughed up a letter. Twilight read it and frowned. "Two pieces of bad news."
"Go on," Spitfire said.
"One, someone stole my balloon from Ponyville," Twilight said.
"Oh man, that was such a fun thing to ride in!" Pinkie said, frowning.
"What's the other news?," Applejack asked.
"The Cutie Mark Crusaders are missing," Twilight said. "The only clue is that they tied a note to Opalescence and she ate all of it except for their names."
"Great, they've decided to become balloon riders," Applejack groaned. "Probably going to try to circle Mystara or something, like in that book." She looked accusingly at Twilight.
"I loved that book as a child! It's why I have a balloon!"
"The Forbidden Island?" I asked. "Where the guy crashes on the island of strange creatures and becomes their king?"
"That's the sequel," she said. "I gave them the first one where he visits the South Pole."
"So now they're Cutie Mark Crusader Polar Explorers," Rarity said flatly.
"It... seems plausible," Twilight said, laughing nervously.
"Do they do this often?" I asked.
"They've never gone this far," Rarity said, sighing. "Scootaloo gets some crazy idea, Apple Bloom convinces herself it's a good idea, and then Sweetie Belle goes along for the ride."
"Except when it's HER idea," Applejack said flatly.
"Spike, take a letter for the Cutie Mark Crusaders," Twilight said. She dictated a long letter basically telling them to go home. Then she sent Celestia a progress report.
"Really, though, they can't go to the South Pole unless they had a pegasus, an adult one, to blow the balloon there or some other kind of magic, right?" Rarity said.
"You need adult level magic to power its magical steering," Twilight said. "Fillies should be stuck just drifting with the wind. Which means they probably would actually head towards Canterlot or Fillydelphia or maybe Mareis."
Everyone relaxed a little with that.
We then came to a door. Ivan disarmed it with Rarity watching. A classic poison needle trap. Also, the door was designed so if you broke it open, blades would try to chop your leg off.
No bucking this door.
It opened into a long line of crypts. Huge niches held coffins big enough for ponies. "Even though this place is probably full of pony undead, we have to check every coffin," I said.
I could tell the idea of tomb robbing did not enchant the ponies.
The coffins were full of ponies, preserved to a degree which was likely a sign they were undead. However, Twilight didn't want to just blow them up unless they did threaten us. This was probably a mistake.
The first ponies looked like normal, non-sentient ponies. As we moved along, they changed, taking on features more like modern ponies. Then suddenly, they started having pony-coloration and totally modern features, but no cutie marks. Then there were ones with cutie marks.
This place was huge and seeing all these dead ponies was pretty morbid. Also, if they are all undead, we are going to be screwed. But none of them had the treasure we wanted.
The coloration of the ponies on one side began to trend towards dark colors: blacks, grays, dark purples. On the other side, it trended to reds, greens, and oranges. And then Applejack's breath caught. "Great-Grandma Apple!"
"Great-Grandma Pie!" Pinkie said, mood suddenly deflating; she'd already been kind of grim, but now her hair wobbled and she stared with sadness. "She died trying to help prevent an earthquake, but it was too much for her."
Spike patted her shoulder. "Your parents and grandmother are still alive, right?"
"I have one Grandpa and one Grandma left," Pinkie said sadly, staring at her.
"Trying to prevent an earthquake?" I said.
"This rock monster caused an earthquake that wasn't scheduled and it threatened to take out the rockface over a town built at the base of the plateau. Her team of Maintainers saved the town but the stress was too much and she was too old. I was born three years after she died, so I never met her." Pinkie shivered. "It's what caused Father and Mother to become Mane-ionites. They felt they'd been wasting their lives, so they settled down and got married."
"Great-Grandma Apple just lived a quiet life, working hard. She had lots of kids and eventually, she got old and died. It's one of the things you learn on a farm. Everything dies and returns to the soil, so new life may be born of it. But what's her body doing here?" Applejack asked, then frowned. "Someone dug up all our ancestors? Is that it?"
"They're likely shadow creations," I said. "Your ancestors would all... be dust by now." I shivered at the sight of them.
There were three empty coffins in Pinkie's line but Applejack's side had her mother in the middle of two empty coffins. Applejack shivered. "Mom," she whispered.
Ivan put a hand on her shoulder, but didn't say anything.
Pinkie shivered, her hair wobbling, and Fluttershy nuzzled her silently.
"What happened?" I asked Applejack, unsure if I should ask.
"They died protecting fillies from the school from a monster that escaped from the Everfree," Applejack said. "This giant puddle of black slime."
I winced. Black Pudding. Dangerous, dangerous, mindless, but dangerous.
So why this? Unless it's an effort to make us so morose we kill ourselves or something... but that seems unlikely.
The crypts ended in double doors with an inscription. "To be an adventurer is to laugh in the face of death." No handle, no latch, no way to open them. Except, I am guessing, to laugh.
"I can't laugh at my dead great-grandmother," Pinkie said weakly, shivering. "I don't like this room."
Who would?
"We'll find another way," Twilight said. Going back, though, the door we came in through was gone.
We were sealed in.
"What, no ha ha now?" Pinkamena said harshly to Pinkie. "It's easy if you don't think about the future, but every story ends the same. With death."
Except mine, maybe.
Pinkie leaned on Fluttershy, twitching.
"Of course, your parents could be dead right now, and you wouldn't know, since you abandoned them," Pinkamena continued.
"So did you or you wouldn't be here," I told her.
She made teeth grinding noises instead of replying.
Dash licked her lips nervously. "I suppose it doesn't help if I laugh."
"You're not smart enough to know what death is," Pinkamena said.
I've defied death, but I don't think I can laugh at it. I never WANT to end up on fire and slowly sliding down a greased rope into a sea of broken glass.
It just happens somehow.
"When I was a filly, Mom used to tell Apple jokes. She married into the Apple Family. So she tried to be more an Apple than anyone else," Applejack said. "One of her favorites was this. What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?"
"You can't cross an apple with a shellfish unless you're some kind of mad wizard," Twilight said, sounding confused.
Spike sidled up to Twilight and whispered loudly to her, "It's a JOKE."
"A crabapple," Ivan said, smiling a little.
Pinkie's ears twitched. "Even I don't make fun of the dead," she mumbled.
"I'm not making fun of the dead," Applejack said somberly. "I'm making fun with the dead. Here's another one. Silver Lining came rushing in to see his dad, Copper Lining. 'Dad,' he said, breathing hard. 'Is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away?' Copper Lining angled his head, a mite worried about his son. "Yes, it is, son. That's what they say.' His son looked relieved. 'Give me an apple quick! I've just broken the doctor's window!'" She smiled now, remembering her mother, no doubt, and Rainbow Dash began laughing and laughing and laughing. Soarin' chuckled and I couldn't help but smile. Rarity giggled, then put her hand over her mouth.
Twilight blinked twice, then laughed, then looked embarrassed. Pinkie smiled, then frowned at herself.
"C'mon, Pinkie, let it out," Applejack said. "You told us to laugh at our fears, right? Ain't no bigger fear than this. Here's another one. Two colts were eating lunch at school. One had an apple and the other told him to watch out for worms in it. The first one said, 'Why should I? They can watch out for themselves without my help.'" She grinned at that, and Pinkie laughed.
Rainbow Dash was STILL laughing, and now Spitfire laughed too, then looked a little embarrassed and Soarin' gave a great guffaw.
"How do you make an apple puff?" Applejack said, grinning.
"You chase it around the garden," Apple Blossom said, surprising us. "What can a whole apple do that half an apple can't do?"
"It can look round," Applejack said, and Pinkie laughed, then tried to stop herself, though it was hard. She glanced over at the body and sighed.
"How do you make an apple turnover?" Applejack asked.
"Push it down the hill," Apple Blossom said, laughing. "A colt asked his father, 'Do you liked baked apples, Dad?' He blinked and replied, 'Everyone likes baked apples, son.' The son gave a sigh of relief. 'Good, because now the orchard is on fire.'"
They kept going relentlessly, Pinkamena trying to stop Apple Blossom, but nothing could stop them. Joke after joke, a barrage of jokes about apples and farming. Ivan threw in a few as well.
Everyone was laughing but Pinkie, who was struggling and twitching and trying not to laugh. "I can't, I can't," she said over and over.
"Wouldn't your great-grandmother want you to laugh? She died so people could be happy. You should be happy to honor her," Fluttershy said very seriously.
"Go ahead, mock death too," Pinkamena said grimly. "We both know there's nothing you consider sacred."
Fluttershy stood up, staring at the ceiling. "That is enough."
"She thinks life is a joke, but the only joke is the one on her. So much potential, but she wastes it all on being silly and trying to make people like her. So she gets used and she doesn't even know it. What a sad, sad pony," Pinkamena said bitterly. "But she's just faking it."
"That's enough," Fluttershy said more firmly and took to the air, staring at the ceiling. Can she see how they see us? "Pinkie is my friend. I don't care who you are. You think she's a fake. If she's fake and you're real, I would rather have the fake."
BURN.
"You don't really like her. You just want someone to laugh at," Pinkamena said bitterly. "No one really likes us."
"Pinkie is my friend," Fluttershy said firmly, trying to stand taller.
"Ahh, yes, the tender love of a coward. That's really useful," Pinkamena said.
Pinkie struggled to her feet. "Fluttershy is not a coward. She's kind and gentle."
"Sometimes I'm jealous of her because Pinkie isn't afraid of anything," Fluttershy said. "But I admire her because she overcomes her fears."
"Yes, you see how well that's going," Pinkamena said harshly.
"Death is very scary," Fluttershy said. "I take care of animals. Do you know how long a mouse lives? I've taken care of the great-great-grandparents of some of the mice I care for right now," she said softly. "But from death, new life comes. Death is not the end, only a change. We will always be reborn in new forms. And our families will continue. Death scares me, but I face it and I will face it in the future. I... will not let it rule me." She sank down and stood by Pinkie Pie. "Laugh with me. Laugh for your great-grandmother."
"I need something to laugh at," Pinkie Pie mumbled.
I jumped up and down making faces and waggling my arms. "BERUEIWLUEREL!"
Pinkie Pie stared, then tried to imitate me. Soon, she, Fluttershy, and I were jumping around, acting ludicrous.
Goodbye, dignity.
And then slowly, with creaky voices, the dead began to laugh. They laughed and laughed and everyone was laughing and jumping around and the gates swung open.
"You are hopeless," Pinkamena said bitterly.
"No, I have hope," Pinkie said. "If even the dead can laugh, then I have hope." She smiled brightly. "Come on, I want to meet Princess Marjorie and see if she likes cookies!"
I have a bad feeling what she likes is us getting an asskicking.
But we'll see.
***************
The next room had the final key. When we took it, a door appeared with three keyholes. Convenient. We took a short rest break, but much as I would have liked more rest, we were pretty sure our foes wouldn't just let us rest. And we had a time limit.
But we took a short break to relax. Pinkie Pie and Applejack traded jokes the whole time, which was pretty entertaining.
"I wish we could have bathed," Rarity complained. It was just a little whiney. But not a lot whiney.
"Me too," I said. "But probably some wandering monster would have shown up for Ivan and I."
"I'm sure we could have worked out something for you to bathe with us," Rarity said.
"We could blindfold you," Dash began, sitting sphinx style next to Soarin'.
"The problem is me being seen, not me seeing ponies naked, when I already see you naked," I said.
"It seems silly," Dash said.
"It's just a human thing," I mumbled.
"I'm surprised Ivan didn't have a cutie mark," Dash mused. "I thought he has a pretty strong purpose."
"Yes, but it was just a potion. I don't think it could grant a true cutie mark," I said. "Any more than I would gain Twilight's magic if I drank it and turned into Twilight."
"You could turn into a woman?" Dash said, surprised.
"Yes," I said. "I have no reason to but I could."
"I prefer you as a man," Rarity said.
"I prefer me as a man too," I told her, then scritched her behind her ears; she was sitting Sphinx style next to me. She pulled several thimbles out of her bags and began manipulating them to scratch my back gently. Ooh, that felt good.
"Damn, that looks good," Rainbow Dash said.
I was a little embarrassed now. "Yes," I squeaked.
Soarin' looked at me and I tried to hint to him to do that for Dash.
He clearly didn't quite get it, and Dash said, again, "That looks really nice."
Now Rarity and I were BOTH trying to signal him and he looked really confused.
Spitfire now whispered something to Soarin', who now said, "Want a back rub, Dash?"
"Yes," she said firmly, sounding a little aggravated.
He began working on her; pony hooves are really not hugely well suited for this but he did his best and she soon was quite happy.
Why am I so embarrassed? Damn, this feels good, though.
"We should think about how not to just walk into a giant trap," I said. "They know we're coming. We need something to catch them by surprise."
"We could all take a little sip of the potion and turn the ponies into humans and the humans into ponies," Pinkie said. "That would confuse them!"
"None of us would be fighting the way we're used to," Twilight said.
"Also, we need something to clearly mark our evil twins," Rainbow Dash said.
"Oh, THAT, I am ready for," Twilight said, smiling impishly.
"I smell a praaaank," Pinkie Pie said cheerfully.
"What is it?" I asked.
"I can't say yet. A joke is funniest the first time, according to my primer on jokes," Twilight said. "But you *will* laugh *and* it will clearly identify them as our evil twins." She giggled. "I can hardly wait to do it."
"That's the spirit!" Pinkie said. "I'm proud of you, Twilight. You normally never pull pranks!"
"Oh man, I am TOTALLY curious now," Spike said. "Are you going to give them all duck heads?"
"If I thought that would work, I would turn them all into cactus," Twilight said. She looked thoughtful. "We could use reinforcements. If we knew some way to find Erik, I'm sure he'd help us."
"I have orders to take him to Celestia," Spitfire said and Soarin' nodded.
"C'mon, surely you could wait until we got out of the dungeon," Pinkie said. "What are you going to do, lock him up in your saddlebags?"
"Celestia wants very much to see him," Spitfire said stiffly. "I know you like him, Twilight, but I can't let him roam free once I'm sure where he is."
FUCK ME.
"I'm sure she'll understand once I explain everything!," Twilight said frantically.
There's going to be a fake Erik somehow and everything will GO TO HELL.
"Relax," Rarity said softly to me. "You're getting tense again."
Her ministrations did make it easier to relax and I suddenly wondered if she suspected. But surely she wouldn't be this nice to me if she did. But there is the other thing, which they all have to suspect...
As if on cue, Dash said, "Marcus, I have to ask you something."
Fuck me. Can't be good. "Go on?"
"Why are you so scared all the time?" Dash asked. "You know you're safe with us."
I relaxed a little, which I could tell confused her. "I have had a long and turbulent life, full of adventure but also danger. Often, running for my life was either the best or the only solution," I told her. "Right now, here, I feel fairly safe. With all of you around me. But dungeons, they especially require paranoia."
"Yeah, but you ran right into the quicksand," Dash pointed out.
I laughed ruefully. "Built up instincts don't always work."
"I... don't know if I should ask," Dash said, suddenly studying the ground.
Soarin' continued to work her back silently, though now he looked curious.
I had a feeling I didn't want her to ask.
"Is it urgent?" Rarity asked, sounding a little nervous herself.
"Maybe I shouldn't ask," Dash told Rarity's foot.
Now I'm curious AND scared at the same time, a combination which usually ends in FIRE.
"Just ask," I said. Dammit, why did I say that? "You're a good friend. I know you wouldn't ask if you didn't think it was important."
Dash said, "I'll be right back, Soarin'."
What?
He blinked and nodded and we went off to the corner. Very softly, she said, "Did something... bad... ever happen to you when bathing with others?" ...
"Because you totally know we wouldn't do anything... you know... to hurt you." Dash sounded very worried.
"I've had people try to kill me when I was naked or at least come at with intent to do me harm," I told her.
Her eyes widened and she grimaced. "We wouldn't... you can trust us," she said urgently.
"But everything I said about humans generally not bathing with the opposite sex also applies. I didn't make that up. I know you won't do anything to me," I told Dash. "I trust you. But you're a woman. It's just not done, generally. Even in Thyatis we segregate our baths by gender." And I have to avoid being KILLED.
"But I'm naked all the time," she mumbled.
"It's a human thing," I told her.
"Most of the human things seem to suck," Dash said. "Though hands seem pretty useful."
"Very," I told her. "A human without hands is pretty much helpless, though you can still walk, at least."
"I..." Dash licked her lips. "Okay. You just have to know you're safe with us."
"I know," I told her. "Thank you."
We came back and settled in where we had been before, though now Dash tried to give Soarin' a backrub. "You two good?" he asked.
"We're good," she said, though she sounded a little sad.
Sorry, Dash, it isn't you, but I have to hide my naked ass.
Or I will surely die.
I now took Rarity's thimbles and worked on her back, while she made happy noises. Always repay a favor.
It now hit me there had been a distinct lag of magical weapon swag. Though apparently Keraptis isn't running the show, so maybe they all took his weapons and are doing it their way.
Though I have this shapechanging sword which may well be the Falchion of Minroth.
Even though this is going to unlock uncomfortable questions, I have to know. So I asked Twilight to come over; she did so with Spike tagging along. He sat down on the other side of Rarity from me.
"Did Owlicious say anything about the Falchion of Minroth's powers?" I asked her. "If Marquetta is behind all this... and I suspect 'Marjorie' is actually her... then she may be after my sword. Though on the other hand, when she invaded my dreams, she didn't actually say anything about my sword."
"Well, I think it hides from her when it is not in falchion form," Twilight said. "Which is also probably why Minroth hasn't reclaimed it."
"Making a weapon that can hide from you seems foolish to me," Spike said.
Twilight licked her lips. "I didn't want to raise this in the middle of a mission but since we're on the topic... Dmitri was you, right?"
"I think," I said. "I'm not sure what's going on. I have bits of memory relating to him... I recognized that death... but it's like he died. And there's other times I thought I was dead and then I wasn't, but... my memories are full of holes and I can't even remember where I was born or who I was at the time." Just thinking about it creeps me out. I stared at the floor. "I might have even been an elf at one point," I told her. "And it's like... That thing when I freaked out and grabbed Dash, I think I was a dwarf."
"Maybe the sword reincarnates you when you die?" Spike speculated thoughtfully.
Rarity nuzzled me comfortingly and I ruffled her mane. "It's okay," she said softly.
"Thank you," I said softly.
Spike resumed Marcus-hate-o-vision. Sorry, man. But everyone needs a hug sometimes.
I got a pony hug from Twilight as well, and then Dash too. I felt better if crushed after that. Ponies are not as lightweight as you'd think.
"I think Spike's theory has merit," Twilight said. "It's as good a guess as any. You've had the sword ever since, right?"
"Yes," I told her. It was an axe when I was Erik, I now realized.
Twilight tapped her cheek. "Any memory of being a pony, a gnome, or a halfling?"
I was afraid to find out but I cleared my mind and asked it for a damn flashback.
Glimmers of thought. Twilight trotted over again and touched her horn to my forehead. Oh crap. And then there was light.
***************
TWILIGHT-INDUCED FLASHBACK:
Boats make me nervous despite living on an island. Open Isle was originally barren, but our ancestors made it suitable for halflings like us and now it's a mixture of grains, vegetables, and orchards. We live in nice burrows, though we keep some surface buildings for the tall folk and on the fringes of the island where the water table is too close to the surface.
We were on our way to a very dangerous place. The Isle of Dread. Home to crazed monsters extinct everywhere else. Mostly various kinds of homicidal lizards. But we can handle them, I think.
Once I am no longer on a boat.
I may be a halfling, but I can kick anything bigger's ass, so long as I have something stable to stand on. If this boat sinks, I will die in the ocean, as even I can't swim 300 miles back to Minrothad.
But I'm sure it'll be fine. I've got a good group of companions.
I glanced over at Sildil, who was staring at her hands for some reason. She's our break-in expert and a little flighty sometimes. She also seems rather confused. "Sildil, what's wrong?"
"I have hands," she said.
This is going to be a long trip, I see.
"And they're exactly where you left them," I said.
"What?" Delune asked; she was seated in the captain's chair on the upper deck; she's trained in the secret Minrothad arts of weather and sailing wizardry. With her, we don't need a big crew for this ship, or even winds. She can MAKE our winds. Her curly black hair whipped about in the wind; she has a single pink stripe for some reason down one side of her hair. "Did Sildil forget her tools? Dammit, I told her to pack them! I made a list of all of my supplies! Sildil, if you don't plan, you can't complain when you don't have something. Am I going to have to turn this boat around?" She put her hands on her hips. "Jacob!"
The hold door soon opened and Jacob stuck his head up; he's our token human, big and strong and smarter than he looks, with short brown hair and a thick mustache Like me, he's in charge of stabbing things. Though he uses a claymore; they're a kind of giant two-handed sword from his homeland in Glantri, Klantyre. "Some things got loose, I was tying them down, Delune," he said.
"Sildil forgot some of her equipment," Delune said, frustrated. "Tell me you packed it for her."
"I've got it all!" Maela said, startling us all. Wasn't she back on Open Isle? Her boyfriend had wanted her to perform for some of his clients; Joam is involved in selling oranges to the Thyatian navy, which uses them to fight scurvy. You can't trust Thyatians but you CAN profit off them. She had her weird instrument; it's half bellows, half piano, half... something. However, she now threw a backpack at Sildil's feet. "Here's all her stuff she forgot! Good thing I remembered! I finished helping out Joam, so I borrowed a boat and came after you." She smiled, making her long brown hair flop about in its fancy style she favors.
We were now towing a small sailing boat. Well, that could be useful, though our failure to notice her arrival doesn't bode well for any pirate encounters we may have.
I patted my short sword. It's enchanted, but not very impressive. However, if all goes well and the map is accurate, then soon I'll have a much better one.
"Hey, Spiira," I shouted up to the crow's nest. Spiira was, in fact, busy mending and improving our sails instead of keeping watch. She had her long red hair pulled back in a white kerchief decorated with embroidered blue gems.
"Can't talk, working," Spiira said. "Be with you in a minute."
"Thanks, Maela," Delune said to her. "Sildil, are you okay?"
Sildil wobbled slightly, then looked at Jacob. "Big!"
"Yes, I am," he said amiably. "Booga wooga!" He faked being a ghost and she jumped, then got mad.
"Don't make fun of me!"
"Is Rafe down with you?" I asked Jacob. Rafe is our cleric; he worships Minroth and has been a big help to me in our adventures.
"Rafe is busy purifying the food and water again, just to be sure," Jacob said. "I don't think doing it every day is necessary."
"I am taking no chances," I told him. I'd rather be careful than rush into disaster.
But really, with this group backing me, I can't go wrong.
"Why are we all barefoot?" Sildil asked me.
"Because we have hairy feet that keep us warm and we're more sure-footed and silent without shoes," I said.
"Technically, since Rafe and I have boots on, we're not all barefoot," Jacob said cheerfully.
Delune now launched into a lecture on why halflings are normally barefoot which really was more than we needed to know, given we're all halflings except for Jacob and he's been around us so long, he already knows.
I dunno what is up with Sildil.
"Time for oompa-dancing," Maela said, starting up her thing... I need to find out what it is one of these days.
Spiira begged off due to the 'need' to make the sails 'better'. Somehow.
The rest of us were soon whiling the hours away with a dance.
**************
We all stared mindlessly at each other, then Dash stared at her hooves. "I have hooves," she mumbled.
"Okay, that answers one question," Twilight mumbled.
"I hope you don't mind I cut in," Pinkie said from behind me, making me jump. "But you said I could come to the next flashback." ...
"I used to be tiny with hairy feet?" Dash said, confused.
"I think Twilight's spell kind of inserted you into people from the memory; I don't think those people were you," I said. Though now I wasn't sure. "I think in the actual events, Maela was not able to just suddenly catch up to us."
"Being bigger than Twilight was kind of cool," Spike said. "And I had a GREAT mustache"
I felt a lot braver than I normally do, though. That one must have been a long time ago. Now I felt kind of jealous of him for not being so worried and having a good group of friends to rely on.
Though this group is pretty good.
"Now I'm going to worry about those sails," Rarity said, sighing.
Soarin' laughed. "Being a cleric was kind of cool. So what happened to them?"
"I guess we succeeded," I said. "But I don't remember clearly."
"We could try again," Twilight said.
"It's probably better not to probe too deep right now as if something attacked while we were all locked in a flashback, then the others would be without our help," I said. "And knocking us out of the spell might cause trouble."
"Ho, ho, Pinkie to the rescue!" Pinkie said cheerfully. "That was Odo the Quick and his friends. They had a bunch of adventures around seventy five years ago," she said.
"But that would be before I was Dmitri," I said hesitantly.
"Yes," Pinkie said. "Unless you time-traveled! I could tell you all about how Khoronus became his own grandfather and his own sponsor for immortality! Thanks to time-travel!"
"You didn't have the sword either, right?" Dash said.
"Yes, I was off on a quest to find some weapon."
"The sword, maybe?" Spike said.
"But Dmitri got the sword from Marquetta," I said.
"Yes, but maybe you were in the group she took it from. Then you reincarnated and came back for it," Twilight said. "Elf, Dwarf, Halfling, Human... I bet you were a Pony at some point too."
"I'm sure Marcus would be a very handsome stallion," Rarity said, smiling.
Probably but it means NAKED ASS and that means DEATH TO MARCUS.
Really, this whole conversation is treading on dangerous ground. If they had seen me since... when did I get the tattoo? Dmitri did NOT have it, I know that. I think I got it when I was Cufen, after I stopped being Aristobolus. Then I became Erik, then Marcus.
Hey wait, that guy was named Cufen? Well, it is a common Minrothadi name, I think.
If he turns out to have the face I had...
I stupidly didn't even ASK. And I'm not sure how I can subtly ask.
"You would be a very beautiful human, I'm sure," I told her. Get off topic of me as pony and on topic of complimenting her and not the topic of how I might be Erik because I AM.
"You've known Ivan for years, right?" Twilight said.
"Yes," I said. "At least a decade, I think. He was on his Shearing when we met."
"Do you know how Odo died, Pinkie?" Twilight asked.
"He went on a quest and never came back," Pinkie said. "Beyond that, I don't know."
"We should probably get going and worry about this later," I said. Much as I want to know. "As the longer we wait, the more time our foes have to get ready."
Twilight nodded, though I could tell her curiosity was up. Aaaargh. She's probably the only one who can solve this but...
We got everyone together, then headed through the door.
**************
We passed down a hallway and into a large room. It was tiled with geometric art and paintings of swirling voids of shadow and creepy red and dark blue points of light. Someone had improvised chains made of adamantine... okay, no one just 'improvises' chains made of adamantine, but it was clear the actual tying of Keraptis to the wall with mithril stakes and adamantine chains had been improvised and showed signs of melting things into place. Probably thanks to Spikey.
One wall was covered with levers and crystal panels and buttons and switches and shining lights and little crystal balls which held various messages. You could see the mouth of the volcano in one of the crystal panels, though nothing interesting was happening unless you happened to really like steam.
Keraptis was human-sized but hidden inside his purple and black robes, and seven stars shone inside his hood, which was kind of creepy. You could see his hands; he had pale flesh with black veins. UGH. However, he had a guest we had not anticipated.
A god-pony.
She was off-white, a kind of creamy, shiny color, not the same as Celestia's white coat, but not that far removed. Buff? No, that's totally not it. There's something more precise than off-white, I think.
Anyway, her oddly shiny coat was matched by a black mane, elaborately coiffed into curls and piled up on her head, under her fancy crown, designed to work around the hair, made of gold and set with opals. She wore... it was like her hoof-guard-things were made of a smoothly polished solid version of her coat. Like jade, but the color of her coat. Something like that.
Probably enchanted, the way I assume Celestia's are.
Her eyes were green like fine jade and she was an alicorn like Celestia. Could this be Luna? Though if that pony in that one picture had been Luna, she'd changed appearance a lot as Nightmare Moon. The alicorn's cutie mark was three smaller stars orbiting a larger one. One of the three smaller ones shone a little brighter than the other two, though not on the level of the larger star.
Then I remembered who Sir Lintsalot served. 'Princess Marjorie the Wise'. Who is probably Marquetta transformed into a god-Pony.
She was accompanied by the Elements of Power but also by three Ponies we had not met yet. One of them was an Earth pony with a gray mane and a coat which was an odd grayish purple, hitched to a cart of cabbages. His cutie mark, however, was a turnip. The second was an elegant unicorn pony with a coat which was a grayish blue and a mane of grayish dark-green. Her hair was elaborately coiffed and she wore golden glasses hooked to her ears by delicate gold chains and a fancy black and white dress. Her cutie mark was a very elegant bag of flour. The last one was a young pegasus stallion, wearing a leather jacket and brass fittings on his hooves for fighting, grey-coated with a black mane. He had a pile of rocks for a cutie mark.
Pinkie stared at them, mouth wide open, unable to actually speak. Applejack gave them an odd look and frowned.
Twilight bowed, so we all bowed to the god-pony. Was she really a god-pony? But we would have heard of her. This was likely Marquetta. But we'd have to see.
"Princess Marjorie, these are the Elements of Harmony, the evil clones of your servants the Elements of Power," Mr. Turnip said. He sounded just like Pinkamena trying to sound male.
Madam LeFlour, on the other hand, sounded like Pinkamena trying to fake a Prance accent. "Zey are a gang of unlettered barbarians with no fashion sense, who steal ze oranges from poor, hard-working dogs and rob and pillage everything in sight."
Ivan gave a thumbs up, grinning.
I now noticed Rarity had donned her fancy dress, thanks to the power of HAT. This is why hats rule.
I touched my hat, reveling in its benevolence. And its toting of an emergency escape spell. I quickly checked for exits. Four tunnels led out of here; none had obvious wards or traps or even doors.
"We have hats, and thus cannot fail to be in fashion," I said. "And Rarity is an expert fashion designer."
"And Fluttershy is a famous model," Twilight said quickly.
Fluttershy said, "I retired from modeling though, to pursue hugging bunnies and feeding ferrets." She paused. "But I can model if you really want me to." She licked her lips nervously.
"I am Princess Marjorie the Wise," Princess Marjorie said with her very smooth, gracious voice. It reminded me of Apple Blossom or Rarity, except she took it to the next level up. Utterly smooth and charming and calm and collected. "I command the stars themselves."
That does make sense. I think the Draconic immortals also line up to a sun/moon/stars triad, with the Great One as the boss. The Sun Dragon commands the metallic dragons, the Moon Dragon commands colored dragons, and the Star Dragon commands gemstone dragons. Which I assume Spike hails from that line, though I'm not sure.
But I've never heard of this 'Princess Marjorie' either. She is probably Marquetta.
Twilight studied her a few seconds, then smiled a little. "I am Twilight Sparkle, Princess, a student of the stars and disciple of Princess Celestia."
"You believe that," she said sadly, "But actually you were made through the wicked magics of this fool Keraptis, mere shadows of my Elements of Power," she continued. Her words held so much conviction, you wanted to believe them, though I knew this wasn't true.
"We are NOT shadows," Applejack said firmly. "Sorry, Princess, but somepony's garbled something somewhere, 'cause that ain't true. We got born in the natural way, and we grew up the natural way and I guess one day we'll die the natural way and go back to the soil. I think that Pinkamena's pulled a fast one on you."
"I would never lie to Princess Marjorie," Pinkamena said. "I am her faithful servant." She sounded angelic but her eyes were angry.
I could see Pinkie's eyes taking in her imaginary friends made real and putting it all together for herself. Her eyes widened, and then she looked worried.
Keraptis tried to speak but nothing came out of his mouth. Yeah, he knows the truth, so she silenced him.
"They're the ones who robbed Vermicoritax, Princess," I said, bowing. "I am Samus Marcus of Thyatis."
"You believe that, but you are just another shadow of the real thing," she said sadly with such conviction, I could almost believe it. But I remembered what Twilight had shown me. I find it hard to believe I was once a Halfling but it feels right.
Unfortunately.
I prefer being a human, but then, I likely thought the same of being a halfling then.
Sammy looked at me and had the GALL to look sad. Bastard.
"You all have stolen items which belong to my servants. But I am merciful as a princess should be," Marjorie said. "Bow to me and swear fealty and I will allow you to live. Any who will not swear must be destroyed."
"Hell no," Spike said.
Twilight looked at the odds against us. Not good at all. A god-Pony who may be a red dragon, our evil twins AND Pinkie's imaginary friends, short one who is on his way to Canterlot.
Pinkie turned to her imaginary friends, "You wouldn't really attack us, would you?"
They all looked intensely uncomfortable. "I could never attack you, Pinkie," Rocky said. "But these other ponies, you know they don't care about you. We're your real friends. You should join us."
Madam LeFlour nodded. "We love you, Pinkie, but we don't like these rude, vulgar ponies who just come around when they feel like it and leave you alone too much."
"That's not true," Fluttershy protested. "We care about Pinkie."
"We have cabbages," Mr. Turnip said with a sing-song voice and I could not help but laugh. So did Rainbow Dash.
Pinkie said, "They are my friends. But you're my friends too. Do we really have to fight?" She winced.
"If you swear fealty to me, you won't have to fight your old friends," Marjorie said smoothly.
"But I can't fight my new friends either," Pinkie said frantically, looking back and forth.
"We'd be happy to have you," Twilight said warmly to Pinkie's imaginary friends.
"You can't leave me," Pinkamena said urgently. "You know they're bad ponies, anyway. You know how badly they treat Pinkie."
"They don't treat me badly!" Pinkie protested.
"Pinkie's our friend, we don't mistreat her," Applejack protested. "We even threw her a surprise party for her birthday!"
"It was fun too!," Pinkie said. "We're going to have a big victory party in Canterlot after this! You should all come," she said hopefully to her imaginary but now semi-real friends.
"A party with Princess Celestia, zat would be wonderful," Madam LeFlour said.
"Oooh, I bet there will be some fine grub," Rocky said gleefully.
"I bet I could sell a lot of cabbages," Mr. Turnip said. He sounded elated.
"I... uh... I don't know how much they go for cabbages," Applejack said to Mr. Turnip. "They can be kinda snooty."
Applejack, don't undercut Pinkie's effort to sway them!
"You should all come!" Pinkie said to the Elements. "We can settle this better with a party!"
"I like parties," Keraptis said with his creepy, creaky voice. Just listening to him made my skin crawl.
Soarin' now whispered to Dash, who looked utterly shocked, but he, to my surprise, looked firm and she nodded, though she didn't seem happy.
"Later," Princess Marjorie said. "All of you must bow to me and swear fealty or you will be destroyed and there will be no parties at all." Her voice held a tone of impatient command. "KNEEL."
"No," Twilight said. "We bow only to Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, not to you. Your servants have stolen items we must recover. We are willing to negotiate but we will not swear fealty."
"Then you will DIE," Princess Marjorie said.
Well, shit. I may end up using that feather, only I doubt I can escape here on my own.
Princess Marjorie spread her wings and shouted angrily at us. Then she shone in a great aura of sparkling stars. It hit us and we all stumbled, the force of her mind hammering at us. Pinkie and Fluttershy fell down and Ivan and I collapsed onto our hands and knees before her power. Rarity stumbled back, as did Soarin', and Spike fell down like Ivan and I. But Twilight stood among the stars as if born to do so, and Applejack planted her hooves, driving them into the stone, and Spitfire, though she was pushed back, now managed to push back to her starting point.
And Dash?
To my utter shock, she flew off down one of the hallways, vanishing from sight. I couldn't believe it.
"We will not kneel," Twilight said determinedly.
Pinkie and Fluttershy both rolled away from Marjorie, then recovered and tried to stop rolling more. Soarin' ended up pressed to the wall. Spitfire tried to advance, but couldn't do it. I fell onto my back like a turtle, tumbled, and caught myself. Damnation.
Ivan cursed like a sailor, catching himself, even as Rarity now stumbled over to me and tried to roll me over.
"Anyone who relies only on their strength to get their way is no princess, nothing more than a bully," Twilight said calmly, as if whatever the hell this is happened all the time.
I tried to focus, but I could feel memories flipping through my mind. I remembered the dragonfear, so powerful, tearing apart our plans. We got some of the dragon's treasure but we fled, possessed by fear and died, screaming, afraid.
I was so afraid. I could see my deaths. Too many of them. Not as many as I had feared, but it held me down, paralyzed me. This was Marquetta and she was going to kill me again and there was nothing I could do. I envied Twilight so much, her certainty and strength.
I always afraid, always torn, always running away. When I do try to commit to something, it blows up. All I wanted to do was to flee again and it made me sick.
Not sick enough to stop wanting to run.
Marjorie turned the full strength of her gaze on Twilight, who gritted her teeth and made her horn glow and stood defiantly.
Applejack got her lasso and snagged Fluttershy, starting to pull her back up by herself and Twilight.
"Marcus, come on, get up," Rarity said, wobbling herself. "You can do it."
I clutched her leg. It helped a little, though she nearly fell on me.
She was shaking, but she stood and I felt even more embarrassed.
Keraptis' eyes were moving around, disturbing me more. The Elements of Power and Pinkie's imaginary friends just watched, waiting for a command. The aura didn't touch them, somehow, though it shone around them.
"I am divine," Marquetta insisted. I hope she's lying and she's just faking being a god-Pony, but who knows. She's got a hell of an aura, just a dragon or an Immortal in mortal form. "You are mortal and you will BOW to the one who is better than you."
"You might be stronger," Twilight said, concentrating, "But you are not better. You misuse your strength instead of using it to defend others. I will not bow. None of us will bow."
Ivan stumbled and then he rose, stumbling forward a step. "I will not bow!" he shouted. "I am sick and tired of wolves like you!" He swept his arm across all our foes as if to somehow smite them with his hand. Slowly, he stumbled over to Pinkie and began trying to help her up.
For some reason, Soarin' started smiling, though he was still pinned to the wall.
Slowly, I climbed up, with Rarity's help, using her to stabilize me, though I had to cling to her to do so. I felt the strength of her mind twine with mine, calming my fears and enabling me to hold out against Marjorie's incredible amount of power.
But I doubt I looked very impressive leaning down and clinging to her like a life preserver.
Fluttershy began rolling forwards; it was stupidly cute to watch her go, and I actually smiled a little. Seeing her trying helped me to try harder.
Spitfire was stuck, unwilling to retreat, unable to advance, Soarin' still stuck to the wall, but Spike crawled over and we stood together, except for the missing Dash, though some of us (Applejack, Twilight) were rather more impressive than the others.
I cannot believe Dash ran away!
On the other hand, I would have run if I hadn't been too scared to run. I'd be on the floor without Rarity.
"You can't break us," Twilight said confidently. I think she's so thrilled to take on Marjorie and hold her own in an aura battle that she hasn't thought about us being severely outnumbered. "We can still discuss this like rational adults."
"Do not talk down to ME, mortal," Princess Marjorie hissed angrily. "You will KNEEL."
The aura came on stronger and we wobbled. Especially me. It was growing unbearable.
And then Soarin' surprised everyone by flailing, shouting and generally carrying on ridiculously. Everyone turned to stare at him, wondering what was going on, even Marjorie.
"He's finally snapped, which you'd expect of anyone crazy enough to kiss a coward like Rainbow Dash," Pinkamena said sadly.
"What a zad fate for a Wonderbolt," Madam LeFlour said.
"You are pathetic," Princess Marjorie said harshly.
This is when I learned something important.
If you fly fast enough, you can actually fly faster than sound. This means no one can hear you coming because you outrace the sound you make.
Which means, crazily enough, that you can sneak up on someone at EXTREMELY high speed.
None of us saw it coming until suddenly, BOOM, a giant rainbow exploded through the room, shredding Marjorie's aura like a knife driven through toilet paper. THEN we heard it. It was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen, and at the heart of it was Rainbow Dash. My face got wet somehow as I stared at it, feeling the strength finally come back into my limbs. She came back.
I should have known she wouldn't run away.
She came back for us.
I nearly fell down from the removal of the pressure. Princess Marjorie went tumbling past Keraptis, who began laughing. "Marvelous, marvelous," he said, his light dots forming into a huge inhuman grin.
"BOO YAH!" Rainbow Dash shouted. "Like a dream, Soarin', like a DREAM."
Soarin' began laughing and I realized... he'd planned this.
I had to give him a thumbs up for that. Nicely played, Soarin'.
I should have known she'd never abandon us.
The Elements of Power stared, eyes wide, as tiny fragments of rainbow fell down on everything. They looked utterly stunned. I'm sure I did too.
When Marjorie rose back up, she was the angriest thing I have seen in a very long time. Smoke came out of her mouth and her eyes burned with rage. "You dare. YOU DARE!"
"I always dare," Rainbow Dash said, striking a cocky pose. "You ready to stop talking smack?"
Princess Marjorie's wings stirred dust as she rose and now her horn grew into a long spear. "Let's try that again. KILL THEM ALL!" she shouted and charged at Dash, who fled before her.
"Dash!" Twilight shouted, but she now had to counter Dawn Gleaming's lightning barrage with a burst of water. She then cast a spell and...
Goatees appeared on our evil twins. Their onrushing attack was briefly stalled by sheer shock at what Twilight had done.
Pinkie fell down and rolled around. "HAHAHAHAH! Good one, Twilight!" She crashed right into her evil twin and now they were both rolling around, Pinkamena yelling angrily.
I expected Sammy to come at me, but he charged at Twilight, then had to dodge when Spike breathed fire at him. He kept trying to come at her, but Spike held him off. "I won't let you hurt her!" Spike shouted.
Apple Blossom now slid on gloves from under her dress. Or boots. Whatever is right for a cloth covering of her forehooves. Then she slinked towards Applejack, who said, "Don't make me ruin your frou-frou dress, fake me."
Applejack was quite surprised when a glowing cord appeared between Apple Blossom's forehooves and then she moved to tangle it around one of Applejack's legs and throw her. "Even a lady must learn to defend herself," she said to Applejack. "Have at thee!" And now the fight really started.
Rocky looked off towards the missing Dash, then at Fluttershy, then at Soarin' and then nodded. He and Cruisin' both came at Soarin', who whipped through the middle of them, tossing them aside; he began dodging them both, keeping them busy.
Spitfire drank more of her potion and she and Fire Swallow began circling each other in the air, spitting fire at each other and dodging each other's shots.
Mr. Turnip rushed over and helped Pinkie and Pinkamena get up. "You okay, Pinkie?" he asked, worried.
"I'm fine! You okay?" she asked Pinkamena.
"I'm fine." Beat. "Mr. Turnip, you have to capture her for her own good! She has to learn these other ponies don't care about her!"
Mr. Turnip laughed nervously, clearly not wanting to do this but also clearly not much of a fighter.
Spikey rushed at me; he wore a red cape and was armed with a golden sword. I parried the blow, but then he breathed fire on me; my sword parted the flames and Spikey's eyes widened. I grinned a little at that. "Do we have to fight?" I asked him. "Surely you wouldn't attack fair Rarity, would you?" I asked.
He faltered, staring at Rarity.
Rarity was locked in an arrow duel with Clarity, arrows arcing around wildly and knocking each other out of the air. I couldn't tell who was better, though I don't think either was going all out yet.
Ivan tried to run over to free Keraptis but was intercepted by Niccolo; the two of them began to fight, sword to sword, but Niccolo began to be forced back. The Elements of Power are copies, but they're clearly strong copies... but Niccolo was just a copy of Ivan. He had no metaphysical weight behind him.
Unfortunately, Rainbow Crash now charged at Spitfire, nailing her and sending her tumbling and she and Fire Swallow began driving her back.
Dragonfly was busy cackling and hurling lightning at Fluttershy, who dodged desperately, trying to avoid being blasted. Without any animals or plants to work with, her powers wouldn't be much use. I felt terrible for her, but I was pinned down.
Twilight now hurled fire at Dawn Gleaming, but Madame LeFlour dumped a huge cloud of flour on her, and now she was inside her own fire storm and she ran around yelping. Spike wanted to help her but was busy with my evil twin. "Sorry, Spike," Sammy said, "But once I set my mind on something I cannot be stopped and I never give up!"
I winced at that.
"I love Dawn Gleaming with all my heart and I won't let her evil twin hurt her!" Sammy said, dodging and weaving, trying to get past Spike's fire blasts.
All your heart. That's a good way to get your heart broken. I fought the urge to flashback to when I was with Dona Carlotta. Too dangerous under the circumstances.
"I won't let you hurt Twilight! Now stand still and BURN UP!" Spike shouted.
I wanted to do something to help Twilight but what could I do? Dammit! I tried to remember how the water spell went.
But I couldn't remember while fighting Spikey, even with him stroking his goatee and being pleased by it. I slowly pushed him back, feeling quite pleased I could at least handle someone. Arrows whizzed around us as Clarity and Rarity continued their arrow duel.
I had to do something; we were outnumbered, many of our people were on the run or getting clobbered. Though seeing Applejack lasso her evil twin and throw her at Rocky did cheer me up a little.
"Boys! Get her!" Apple Blossom shouted and now a squad of ten Bulldogs ran in. Oh bloody hell! They all rushed at Applejack and started chasing her, while Apple Blossom looked satisfied.
I had an idea. It was dangerous. "Rarity, you could manipulate a lot of levers and switches at the same time, right?" I asked her.
Twilight had washed herself off and was now chasing Dawn Gleaming angrily, hurling lightning at her, but now she got a faceful of flour again, leading to her getting zapped.
DAMMIT.
"If I wasn't being shot at," she said.
"I will guard; you need to hit every button, flip every switch on the controls. It doesn't matter how, we just need a source of chaos," I told her.
"I can't let you do that!" Spikey said, rushing at me.
Rarity nodded, parrying another shot; they were firing each other's arrows at each other now, an intricate, beautiful dance of arrows. I would have enjoyed watching it if I hadn't been fighting so hard.
A bulldog now flew overhead, thanks to Applejack. Even better. I reached out and PUSHED with magic, dropping him on Clarity, whose arrows fell as she fell. "Thanks, Applejack!" I shouted. Unfortunately, this got me knocked down by Spikey, who then kicked me in the groin. OWWW!!!!
Rarity reached out with her power and hit every kind of control she could. Keraptis began laughing and we could see the walls moving and pits opening in the floor and rooms realigning and rebuilding. The ceiling now opened, there was a flash of light, and a half-dozen... no, just five... fillies fell on me.
OWWW!!!
Rarity said, "Sweetie Belle, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"
"Thanks for breaking our fall, mister!," the yellow and red filly said to me; she, like all the others, wore a maroon cloak with a golden lining. Three of them (including her) had a blue shield on it with a pony rampant. The other two (a purple and blond unicorn and a grey and red (curly) earth pony) had a white shield with a blue ice cube on it.
"You're welcome," I mumbled as the rest hopped off me. The third one with a rampant pony cloak was an orange pegasus with a purple mane.
"Holy cow, it's a human!" the pegasus said. "Two! THREE! FOUR!"
"And look, two of Spike!" the red-maned yellow filly said.
This must be the Cutie Mark Crusaders, but what are they doing HERE?
BAD BAD BAD BAD.
"Sweetie Belle!" Clarity said, getting up. "This place is dangerous!"
"I... I am seeing double!" Sweetie Belle said, panicked
"And me," the curly haired redhead said, looking around frantically. "My glasses aren't helping!"
"We're all seeing double!," the blonde unicorn said. "All the adults have split in two!"
Keraptis maniacal laughter didn't help. Neither did having a half dozen trolls drop into the room out of another ceiling panel. Madam LeFlour turned and dumped flour on them, blinding them, but now we had blinded trolls roaming around, trying to claw anything they could hear. Fortunately, this meant two of them started trying to eat each other.
Another troll rushed at Pinkie; Mr. Turnip began firing cabbages at him, and he began eating them. "I am going to run out! Think of something!" he said frantically to Pinkie.
Pinkie pulled out a hideous twisted monstrosity of a cupcake; worms were crawling around in it, it smelled like vomit and it was grey and puke green. "Distract him," she said to Pinkamena as she balanced it on one hoof.
Pinkamena drew herself up, mimicking a troll, then began roaring at him and shaking her butt. ...
He stopped and began doing the same thing. ...
As they did this, Pinkie crept up and shoved the cupcake of doom in his mouth. He turned purple, fell over and began vomiting, then she, Pinkamena, and Mr. Turnip fled his presence. "Great job, sister!" Pinkie said as they ran.
"I am not your sister!" Pinkamena protested, while Mr. Turnip laughed. "And if I was, I'd be the ELDER sister!"
Spikey clutched his head. "Kids, what are you doing here?"
"Hey, you're a BABY," the yellow and red foal said irritably. "Don't call me a kid! I'm a BIG pony!"
If Applejack hadn't been so nimble, the dogs would have pulled her down by now, but as it stood, she was barely keeping free. "Apple Bloom, you are in all the trouble in the WORLD!"
"Princess Luna sent us to rescue you!" Apple Bloom said. "And get our cutie marks!"
Unless she's crazy or they are more badass than they look... no, they got conned by something or someone.
"Can any of you make a distraction?" I asked.
"Young lady, what are you doing?" Clarity asked Sweetie Belle.
"Sweetie, you were supposed to stay home!" Rarity said.
Sweetie swung back and forth like she was mounted on a pivot and was clearly overwhelmed by events.
A ceiling panel opened up, sucking up Soarin' and Cruisin' and Rocky; you could hear chaos in progress as they got sucked out of sight.
Distantly, I heard Rainbow Dash shout something about raisins.
I don't know either.
A Troll now rushed towards us and the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
SHIT.
Lightning crackled from a painting at Ivan and Niccolo, but they both dodged and Keraptis kept laughing, clearly pleased by the utter anarchy.
I am starting to think my idea was not the best one I have ever had.
Rainbow Dash now came zooming into sight. "Hah! I lost her! Hey, get off Spitfire!" ZOOM. WHAM. Rainbow Crash and Dash tumbled, locked in combat, and Spitfire exploited the surprise to knock Fire Swallow into a Troll. Who she promptly set on fire and he fled screaming, dropped into a pit trap, which flung him into the ceiling; he fell down in the pit, bounced up and continued bouncing, while on fire.
"If any of you fillies can make flame, BURN THE TROLL," I said and stepped up to fight it.
Good news, my sword took its left arm off.
Bad news one, the arm began crawling towards Apple Bloom.
Bad news two, it cut me on the chest despite my armor. OWW. Fortunately, it wasn't deep but I screamed like a child being beaten.
Low pain threshold is me.
"I can make bubbles and mist!" the purple and blond unicorn filly said. Mist now shrouded the entire hall, hiding most of the chaos from us. I don't know if this was good or bad.
The curly haired redhead threw licorice whips at the troll; it stupidly bent over to grab them and I turned my sword to an axe and took its head off. OH YEAH.
Mind you, troll, this meant the head began rolling around trying to find its body.
Rarity shot the crawling arm, then fired the arm off across the room into the mist.
Clarity said, "Spikey, BURN IT."
He set the Troll on fire and I hacked it up while trying to tell my chest to not bleed too much. Then Apple Bloom pulled out a bottle and hurled it at it; it went up in more flames. "Lantern oil! HAH!"
The troll collapsed, burning; we could still hear, but not see, the chaos still going on.
"Marcus, hold on," Rarity said and very quickly bandaged my wound, while Clarity and Spikey moved to defend the fillies.
"My dear sister," Clarity said to Sweetie Belle, "Stay behind me, I will protect you."
Damn, they... I remembered Apple Blossom. They must have some memories and bonds.
Probably more like neutral twins, then.
A thought hit me. "You two have Cutie Marks already?" I said to the blond unicorn and the curly redhead. That's why they have polar expedition patches instead.
"Yes," the curly redhead said. "I'm Twist and this is Dinky Doo. I'm an expert candymaker and Dinky is the mistress of fog and mist magic!"
They brought an expert candymaker to try to rescue the Elements of Harmony from something.
Filly logic all over.
Children... just a little crazy. In every species.
"Clarity, is there somewhere safe we can take the children?"
"My quarters WERE safe," she said. "But now everything's going berserk." She frowned.
"I could go check," Spikey said.
"Please," she said and he ran into the mist.
Fluttershy now ran up to us. She was breathing hard. "She's so relentless," she said. "S... Scootaloo? Sweetie? What are you all doing here?"
"They came to rescue us," I said deadpan.
Fluttershy blinked in surprise, then took a licorice stick from Twist and began munching on it.
Distantly, I heard Dragonfly cackling maniacally and shouting about lightning, then thunder boomed.
"MY CABBAGES!" Mr. Turnip shouted somewhere.
"Who are you, Mr. Human?" Sweetie asked me.
"My name is Samus Marcus, and I am a diplomatic envoy for your Princess Celestia, among other things," I told her, smiling.
"Marcus is a unicorn human. We are close friends," Rarity said to Sweetie warmly.
Sweetie Belle blinked and looked at my clearly hornless forehead. "Do you have a cutie mark?" Sweetie Belle asked.
I knelt down by her, then ruffled her hair with my magic. Her eyes widened. "Humans usually don't have cutie marks. We spend our whole lives searching for our special purpose and some of us never find it before we die."
She looked stunned, then started crying and I felt horrible for making her cry. "I'm sorry," she said.
"It's not your fault," I told her, then stood back up.
Fluttershy was busy fussing over the other kids and trying to help keep them from wandering off into the mist and into the chaos around us.
Rainbow Dash flew by over us, Rainbow Crash by her side; only the goatee on Rainbow Crash let you tell the difference.
"Hi, Dash!" Scootaloo shouted, but Dash just kept going and vanished into the mist again.
And Keraptis KEPT ON LAUGHING.
"Don't cry, little sister," Clarity said kindly to Sweetie Belle.
"Why are there two of you? And why do you have a goatee?" Sweetie Belle asked, confused.
"Twilight put a spell on me," Clarity said, clearly irritated. "And someone made these clones of myself and the rest of our group."
"Made clones of US," Rarity said firmly.
I was starting to worry something picked off Spikey.
Now Sammy lunged out of the fog. "I have you... oh, it's you, my evil twin." He stroked his goatee, clearly pleased by it.
I will note the real sign of his evil, though was that he had NO HAT AT ALL.
"Kids," I said urgently as he got ready to charge me.
"Oh, hi, kids, how's the crusade for cutie marks coming?" he asked them cheerfully.
"Does everyone who comes here get an evil twin?" Scootaloo said hopefully.
"He's the one who made the evil twins," Sammy said, pointing at me.
"We still don't have our cutie marks and we had to postpone our polar expedition to come rescue people but now everyone wants us to just SIT HERE," Apple Bloom said.
Clarity grabbed Dinky, who was about to wander into the mists, and pushed her back gently into the child mob.
"It's extremely dangerous," I told her. "It's our first priority to keep you safe."
"No battle to the death, then," Sammy said.
"Later, when kids aren't in danger," I told him, hoping he'd go for that.
"Damn, I had a big speech and everything," he said. "Well, I expect Dawn Gleaming needs me right now."
Dammit, I can't let him reinforce the attack on Twilight but I have to protect these kids in case any more...
"ROAR!"
"Was that a lion?" I asked.
"I think so," he said, frowning.
Distantly, we heard lightning crackle and then a lot of howling about tentacles. ...
"So why aren't you dating Twilight?" he asked me. "We've been together several years." ...
"We just met a few days ago," I told him.
"Well, true, you just came into existence recently," he said.
Sweetie Belle was looking more and more confused.
"You just came into existence," I said firmly. Or had he? For all I know, they have all been around, but why is he Samus Marcus now if that's the case? I wish I could find out the history he thinks he has.
Fluttershy said, "Sammy, you are the clone. I can tell, as a druid."
Sammy frowned at that. "My druid says otherwise."
"ROAR!"
"But I had best go protect Dawn Gleaming." Sammy then cast a spell and FLEW off into the mists. ...
I guess he's picked up more wizardry from Dawn Gleaming.
Dammit.
"C'mon, we can help!" Apple Bloom said urgently.
"Clarity, can you contact Spikey? I think something's happened to him."
She frowned deeply. "I will be quite wroth with anyone who hurts my cuddly little Spikey." She began concentrating with her horn, which glowed.
Rarity was gently nuzzling Sweetie Belle, who finally calmed down.
"Face me you coward!" Dragonshy shouted out in the mists. "I can't blast you if you hide in the fog!"
All five Cutie Mark Crusaders stared, then looked at Fluttershy.
"I'm sorry," Fluttershy said to their hooves.
The floor suddenly began to move, a crack opening with Fluttershy, Clarity, Dinky, Scootaloo on one side, and myself, Rarity, Apple Bloom, Twist, and Sweetie Belle on the other. I could hear grinding noises and saw the ceiling moving and something coming down.
"Everyone regroup!" I shouted and we all got on one side as a platform rose up with two vaguely humanoid figures; they were made of black rock, obsidian, I think, glowing from the inside at times, eyes shining red. Rockfire Dreadnoughts. I hate Elementals.
Dinky hid behind Clarity, while Scootaloo stood defiant, rearing up. "Bring it!" she shouted.
Crazy pony.
Apple Bloom stood next to me. "Cutie Mark Crusader Elemental Tamers, STRIKE!" She reared up defiantly.
Twist looked rather more nervous but stood her ground, legs shaking.
Sweetie Belle started to hide behind Rarity, then saw her friends and stood by them. SWEETIE BELLE, YOU FOOL! "We're ready!"
One of them lunged at Scootaloo, but Fluttershy suddenly reared up, eyes widening. "No! You won't hurt these children! Bad elemental, BAD!"
It stumbled back, confused and she advanced on it, berating it for scaring the children.
The other one, though, now rushed at me, only to get shot by Rarity and Clarity in the eyes. It howled and I stabbed it; it bled magma, though the magma on my blade burned away. Oh yeah, magic artifact sword is the best sword.
Apple Bloom ran around behind it and headbutted it in the back of the knee. Sweetie Belle did the same.
"No, stay behind us!" I shouted, but now it fell backwards.
ON THEM.
"OWW!!!"
I quickly attacked it as they got loose.
"Get behind us!" Rarity said urgently to them.
Dinky concentrated and a stream of bubbles hit where my foe was 'bleeding' and now ice spread through the hardening magma into it and it howled. Dinky now curled up in a ball behind Clarity and tried to hide. "If I can't see them, they can't see me!" Dinky announced.
I wish.
SO MUCH.
I struck the frozen spot and it shattered and now it was howling and I pressed my advantage, while Fluttershy now forced the Elemental to back into the mists, blubbering before her wrath.
That must be 'the Stare'.
My foe cupped some of its magma and got ready to throw it at the ponies; I managed to parry most of it but got some on me. OWW!! I stumbled, yelping. DAMMIT.
It got shot again, but got ready to attack me again. Sweetie now threw a roll of cloth in its face and as it stumbled, I stabbed it and it fell apart into rocks.
I'm going to need a new leather jacket. "Oww, oww, oww, oww!"
Spikey came up. "The bedrooms have reconfigured into some sort of elaborate puzzle where you have to move rings between towers."
"But I had a lot of things in there!" Clarity said frantically.
"Marcus!" Rarity said, and then took my jacket off and started bandaging me. "Sweetie, get the burn cream. Apple Bloom, get him a drink. Dinky, can you make an ice pack? Twist, get him some candy. Scootaloo, keep watch but do NOT go very far."
They all sprang into action and I was soon topless and being treated, trying not to cry and whimper in front of the fillies. Those burns did not look nice AT ALL.
By the time Fluttershy returned, they had me bandaged up. We have to get these kids somewhere safe so we can help our friends. Dammit.
At least I have licorice.
Tasty.
"I think at this point, we'd best try and get things under control, assuming we can even find the controls in this anarchy," Rarity said.
"That sounds reasonable, since we have no haven to retreat to," Clarity said, frowning.
We began to slowly... advance? Retreat? Move, anyway, with Scootaloo keeping watch.
"This is the best trip ever," Scootaloo said excitedly.
Because you are INSANE.
"You said Princess Luna sent you?" Rarity said, frowning.
"We all dreamed she came to us and since we all dreamed the same, it had to be true," Dinky said.
I buried my face in my hands for a few seconds. Then I wondered WHO and WHY. Marjorie? I could see her luring them in.
"There you all... MY FACE!" Marjorie shouted distantly and I laughed softly.
"Marcus," Rarity said. "Spikey and I will guard, you and Clarity can support me."
"I'm not that hurt," I said. "And you're a better archer than you are a melee fighter."
"Yes, but I don't want to see you get hurt like that again," she said urgently.
"I'll be fine," I said.
She licked her lips nervously, then nodded. "If you're sure."
I'm more likely to come back from the dead for no reason than you are, but saying that will worry her more.
"Who is taking care of our pets?" Rarity asked Sweetie sternly.
"They're all here in my saddlebag!" Sweetie said. "Playing together nicely!"
A dog, a cat, an alligator, and a bunny.
I'm sure that is going well.
A bunny now stuck his head out of Sweetie's saddle bag and made bunny noises. Fluttershy nuzzled him. "Have you been a good boy?"
Bunny noises.
"You've been chosen king of the saddlebag? That's nice."
....
"I'm going to need you all to help, so come out," Fluttershy said.
"Is that wise?" I said.
Fluttershy nodded and now the four animals clambered out. The alligator was... smaller than I expected. The dog was nearly the size of the fillies. It now began herding them, keeping them from wandering off. The cat was a white Alphatian, right down to being dressed up a little; she licked her paws. Angel Bunny, the rabbit, was a little white rabbit with a stern expression.
Fluttershy now began singing and they began GROWING. ...
Soon, they were the size of adult ponies and glowed a soft gold and pink. "Guard the fillies," Fluttershy said and Angel Bunny nodded and made animal noises at them. The alligator, now the size of a real one, promptly ran off into the fog, but the rest helped us herd the kids. Fluttershy also introduced them all to me.
Keraptis, by the way... STILL LAUGHING.
"My sword! I sense it!" Marjorie shouted.
I looked down and saw that at some point I had transformed it to falchion mode. I quickly turned it back into a gladius.
"NO!!!!!"
Hehe.
"Magic sword?" Twist asked me.
"Yes," I told her.
"No, Gummy, don't eat Mr. Turnip's cabbages!" Pinkie shouted distantly.
"MY CABBAGES!"
"I know they make you big and strong, but he needs them to support his family and his dog!" Pinkie shouted urgently.
"Do you have a boutique?" Rarity asked Clarity curiously as we tried to find where the controls had run off to.
"Darling, I have a line of twelve boutiques, including branches in Dream Valley, Darokin City, and Shireton," she said. "Running them all from Canterlot isn't easy, but it keeps Spikey and I busy and of course, he can communicate with any of my managers with just one cute firey breath."
She began buffing some of his scales with a cloth, which caused Spikey to make happy noises. "I'll get this soot off you," she told him.
"Thanks, dear."
"Stupid fog, Dinky, you're stopping me seeing Rainbow Dash being cool," Scootaloo grumbled.
"But it hides us from our enemies and from the Oards," Dinky said urgently.
"Oards are a myth," Rarity said wearily. "How do you have time to design things for all your customers with twelve boutiques?"
What is an Oard? Beyond something Rarity is clearly tired of hearing about.
"Oh, darling, that's only for the small circle of platinum circle customers," Clarity said. "Who can afford my personal services. I spend some time on them, some on managing and the rest on periodic updates of my four seasonal lines. Gold circle get to have adjustments made on their off-the-rack and get one outfit a year personally designed for them. Silver circle get discounts."
"And copper?" I asked.
"They are allowed to browse without someone watching to make sure they don't steal anything," Clarity said. ...
"You would not believe how many parasprites there are in Pony society, darling," Clarity said, hoof to her face and striking a pose of anguish. "Some ponies do all the work and the rest just feed on their labors without wanting to work themselves. Outrageous."
"They're just so greedy and selfish," Spikey said, frowning.
"Exactly," Clarity said.
"That sounds like something from Atlas Hugged or the Fountainhoof," Rarity said, frowning.
Works I am not familiar with.
"But of course, marvelous books, changed my life for the better when I was a young filly. Everyone should read them," Clarity said.
"They're MEAN," Fluttershy said condemningly. "Mean, mean, mean."
Twist sang, o/~ mean, mean, mean o/~
Pretty soon, all the fillies were singing that and Clarity looked first embarrassed, then annoyed. "It is not mean, merely realistic. A pony must EARN what she gets. That's why I work so hard instead of relying on others to just give me what I need. And I expect the same of them. Of course, you have to reward hard work. My Spikey works very hard and I reward him with my love and vice versa." She smiled goofily and he hugged her.
"Love isn't a reward for work," I said. "It's a burning passion inside you for someone, the willingness to give up anything for them if you have to, in order to help and protect them. The need to be with them, the need to help them, to be part of their life and you part of theirs. Love is giving without asking in return." I was getting heated up. "Even if they don't love you back. Though of course, it's better if they do."
"That just gets you taken advantage of," Clarity said, then held up a hoof and pointed.
Pit trap! Rarity and I began disarming it while Clarity and Spikey stood guard. Apple Bloom watched the two of us intently. "Can I help?" she asked.
"Stand here," I told her; she put her weight at a key point, keeping the trap shut while we disarmed its trigger.
"You have to risk that in love," Rarity said. "And love can die, will die eventually if it is one way. But you can only find love by risking getting hurt, by giving without asking, in the hope the other will give without you asking as well. It's anticipating what your loved one needs, so you can act as one without need to plan your cooperation." I pried open a floor segment and she reached in and worked the mechanisms with some guidance from me, feeling it out and then sliding in the safety pins.
"Exactly. Love, like trust, is a leap in the dark to an unknown shore," I said. "But if you don't make that jump, you'll always be alone."
"People often fail you," Clarity said softly.
"I know," Rarity said, sighing. "And it's hard to keep trying, but you have to persevere to become good at what you do, right?"
There was a click. The trap was disarmed and we could advance.
"I agree completely," Clarity said.
"That's how I got Clarity's love; I kept trying and never gave up," Spikey said, smiling.
Rarity paused. "Ahah!" She began concentrating and her horn glowed. "It works, and I wish I had thought of this sooner."
Clarity studied her. "How is gem detection going to help us now?"
"Detecting the direction the controls are in," Rarity said. "They include gemstones."
A swarm of stirges flew at us and then vanished in Spikey's flames. Heh.
We reached the controls just in time for the mist to suddenly vanish in a wave of power. Worse, Marjorie was coming our way.
Shit.
**************
The whole place had turned into a chaotic mass of traps, monsters, and people fighting each other. Rainbow Dash and Crash were flying around overhead, duking it out, while Rocky chased them, trying to catch up. Cruisin' and Fire Swallow were dueling with Soarin' and Spitfire as well, dodging flaming hoops which kept shooting at them all.
The alligator, Pinkie, Pinkamena, Mr. Turnip, and Madame LeFlour were making a stand around Mr. Turnip's cart against a swarm of angry giant crabs. The alligator had clamped onto the claw of one of them and was being waved around, while Pinkie shouted frantically.
Niccolo and Ivan were still dueling through a mess of traps: blade traps, dart traps, pit traps, falling block traps.
Dawn Gleaming and Twilight had both been caught by a mass of black tentacles; I recognized that spell; Spike and Sammy were trying to cut them free but now they got grabbed as well. "Dammit, that spell is dangerous!" Dawn Gleaming said. "You should have been shooting acid arrows at me!"
"I haven't learned that one," Twilight said, embarrassed.
"And this spell is so stupidly strong we're gonna be stuck until it finishes!" Dawn Gleaming said. "How are Sammy and I going to finish our new paper if we're stuck here forever?"
"We can at least discuss the problem of dating Nob Nar," Sammy pointed out.
Oh god, Nob Nar date debates. You fool, don't go there, you'll never escape the argument!
Nob Nar was one of the Halfling High Heroes, their patron immortals. He fell in love with a human woman from Halag, but the Baron of Halag wanted the woman, heroism, love, tragedy, blah blah, you know the drill. Nob Nar clearly existed, but it's hard to tell which stories are true and when he was alive, as some later tale-teller seems to have added aspects of other heroes' tales to his.
Anyway, I could go on about this until we die, but I need to FOCUS.
Or death will come soon.
Applejack and Apple Blossom were circling each other, but their fight kept getting interrupted by monsters attacking them. Then Apple Blossom saw Apple Bloom; her eyes widened and she began charging our way with Applejack chasing her.
"There you are!" Dragonfly shouted and charged towards us.
And then there was Marjorie, who was coming our way. She looked utterly enraged. "Dragonfly, blast them all!"
"But... there are fillies there," Dragonfly said hesitantly. "They've been foolish but not that foolish." Then she saw our giant animals and she blinked.
"That bastard has my sword," Marjorie said. "It was stolen from me and I will HAVE it."
Fluttershy began another song, adding another layer of glow to her animal friends.
The fillies stared at Marjorie. "She's like Princess Celestia," Twist said.
"If Princess Celestia was a thieving, arrogant bastard," I said. "This sword is mine, earned with my own blood," I told Marjorie. Very softly, I said to the fillies, "Run to the controls and reverse them all if this turns into a fight."
Apple Bloom nodded and Scootaloo now pulled a scooter out of her saddlebags. ...
"Then you ARE him," she hissed. "I don't know how you have eluded me all these years."
"Hello, Marquetta," I said. "I'll confess I don't know either. But if you really want this, give us back the treasure stolen from Vermicoritax and I'll give you the sword." I love this sword but if it can get us out of this mess, I'll give it up. Also, knowing a grand wyrm is hunting me for it means it paints a target on me too.
Clarity clutched at her jewelry. I don't know what she's going to do about that.
A giant snake fell onto Marjorie; she flung it across the room, horn glowing, and it landed on Keraptis and began crushing him as he howled. Oww.
"Boss, no, don't do that!" Pinkamena shouted. "He'll mutate it somehow!"
Marjorie quickly pulled it off him and Keraptis cursed.
"Pinkamena, you are a good and faithful servant," Marjorie said. She flapped her wings and the crabs were blown away from the group rallying around the wagon. This also sent the alligator tumbling.
"GUMMY!" Pinkie shouted, running after the alligator. ...
Pinkamena smiled a goofy smile for a few seconds before reverting to usual.
"You are the thief," Marjorie said. "Hand him over to me or you all will die."
"No, not the children," Clarity begged.
"They're innocent of any theft," Dragonfly said. "Let me kill the thief for you!"
"You want a piece of me, you fake Princess? BRING IT," Scootaloo said, making a come hither for a beating gesture with one hoof.
"I will NOT let you kill him," Rarity said angrily, then looked at the fillies and grimaced.
I know, I know.
"Let's not be hasty," Clarity said. "My sister is in the line of fire!" she said urgently.
Marjorie flapped her wings and the fillies tumbled away from us, over to the controls. "Clarity, Spikey, back up. Now you have a clear shot, Dragonfly."
"With pleasure! Especially against..."
Winona, now the size of a pony, pounced on Dragonfly, snatched her staff and ran towards Applejack, who was running towards us.
Opalescence now flashed her claws at Marjorie, clearly trying to scare her. Angel Bunny ran up and pulled Dragonfly's hood down over her face.
Clarity and Spikey now ran over to the fillies to check on them, even as Marjorie brushed Opalescence aside, even enlarged; she tumbled across the floor as Pegasi dueled above her.
Marjorie rose up over Rarity, Fluttershy, and I. "Flee, ponies, or die with the THIEF."
"No," Rarity said, arrows hovering by her head. "Back off now," she ordered.
"I won't let you hurt him or Rarity," Fluttershy said firmly, standing by my side. "You shouldn't be so mean."
I felt the urge to cry for a moment. I am not used to having people standing up for me, though Ivan and Helga always did. Also, I was scared shitless. Once again, I stood bravely because I could not muster the energy to actually RUN.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders began flipping switches and jamming buttons and now everything began changing more. Clarity said, "Don't just randomly hit buttons!"
A giant duck now leaped down and swallowed up Rainbow Dash and Rainbow Crash and ran off with them. ...
"Okay, maybe not THAT button," Apple Bloom said thoughtfully.
"Then, you all will..."
The floor opened under Marjorie and she dropped out of sight. "YES!" Scootaloo said, then pulled the lever back and it closed up. "I WIN!" She quickly checked her flank.
No cutie mark yet.
I stared. It couldn't be that easy.
We were all thrown back even as I saw Applejack and Winona playing keep-away with Dragonfly's staff as Apple Blossom tried to help her fellow Element of Power to recover it.
The ground began to shake.
"Rarity, you have to free Keraptis," I told her. "Before Marjorie breaks back out."
"But you..."
"We need reinforcements," I told her. "If he is in command, hopefully we can drive off Marjorie."
She closed her eyes, then nuzzled me quickly. "Fluttershy, protect him."
"Of course," she said, rallying Opalescence and Angel Bunny to our side.
Then Rarity galloped off and I prayed she could get him free before Fluttershy and I die horribly.
While we got ready to die, I looked up and saw Spitfire and Fire Swallow still sparring, so I yanked Fire Swallow's tail as much as I could with magic. Spitfire scored a hit, knocking Fire Swallow down into the middle of the crabs. I gave her a thumbs up.
Then Marjorie exploded up out of the pit trap, and then she hurled chunks of floor at the tentacles holding Sammy and Dawn Gleaming and pulled them over to her, even as the Cutie Mark Crusaders ran rampant on the controls while Spikey and Clarity futilely tried to stop them.
Sammy stroked his goatee again, smiling. I touched my hat. "Hello, evil twin," I said to him.
"You're the evil twin," he said. "Or you'd be with Twilight."
Uuuurgh. "Twilight has someone else on her mind," I told him, and he grinned at me. Dammit, he knows. DO NOT SAY IT. "Anyway, we're not here to talk romance," I said. "Marjorie, I don't even remember for sure why I wanted this sword, but it's mine now and even though I could give it up, I'm not going to let you kill me. You already slaughtered all my friends," I continued. "I'm not letting you do that again, Marquetta."
Spikey paused. "Wait, she's not Marquetta, she's Princess Marjorie." But he sounded unsure.
"I am not Marquetta," Marjorie said.
"Liar! You are Marquetta," Applejack said, her Element glowing. "I am the Element of Honesty! Now, tell the TRUTH!"
She planted her hooves and stared intently, even as Winona ran around trying to dodge Dragonfly and Apple Blossom.
Marjorie made gurgling noises and then simply spat lightning at Applejack, knocking her back into the tentacles, which tried to grab her; she began beating them around.
"FREEZE RAY!" Dinky shouted and now a wand came out of the ceiling and froze Marjorie in a block of ice, but she shattered it.
Marjorie now rose up over us and...
Twilight set her tail on fire. "I won't let you hurt them!" she shouted.
Winona now dodged everything and brought Dragonfly's staff to Fluttershy, who hooked a leg around it, then parried Marjorie's lightning when she spat it at us. "I am a druid," she said. "Do not abuse nature's power," she said urgently.
Apple Bloom said, "Hey..." She suddenly began fiddling with the controls and part of the room now began turning itself into a living room. "I think I'm getting the hang of this," she said excitedly.
Marjorie flapped her wings and put her tail out and now looked even angrier. "All of you will pay for this indignity!"
"If you think that's indignity," Pinkie said, "You haven't seen anything YET."
She popped up and hit herself in the face with a pie. "See, THAT is indignity!"
Marjorie stared at her in frank disbelief.
"And here's double indignity!" Now she hit Pinkamena in the face with a pie.
"Hey!"
"TRIPLE!" Madam LeFlour now was pie'd.
"Tasty punishment!" Twist shouted, running over and 'whipping' Pinkie with a licorice whip.
"Whip it good!" Pinkie shouted.
Pinkamena stared at Pinkie. "How can you stand to be so ridiculous?"
"Because it makes people laugh," Pinkie said. "Dignity is overrated."
"I am NOT laughing," Marjorie said angrily.
"Try it, it's fun!" Pinkie said to Pinkamena, handing her a pie.
Pinkamena hit Pinkie in the face with it and everyone except Marjorie began laughing. Pinkie laughed the loudest of all. "Well done!" Pinkie said to her.
Pinkamena stared at everyone looking at Pinkie. She seemed baffled. Even Opalescence was laughing a kitty laugh.
Apple Bloom now hit a button and a blade trap swung down and cut Applejack free. "YES!"
"Show me!" Scootaloo said. Fillies crowded around the cackling Apple Bloom.
"Come on, laugh, you can do it," Pinkie said to Pinkamena.
Pinkamena made an odd, dry noise.
Fluttershy laughed, a quiet little titter. "Like this!"
Pinkamena laughed weakly and Pinkie applauded; Pinkamena now looked embarrassed. "It wasn't very good," she said weakly.
"It's a good start. Now for my next trick..." Pinkie began.
"DIE!" Princess Marjorie shouted and now she spat fire at us. I grabbed Fluttershy and jumped, and then Fluttershy frowned at Marjorie.
"I was trying to help Pinkamena," Fluttershy said. "That wasn't very nice at all."
"I am not here for nice but for revenge! On Celestia and on HIM," Marjorie said. "Now DIE." She spoke a horrible syllable and I felt my body start to shut down, but Fluttershy began to sing and my body rallied; the air hung with power but Fluttershy's Element glowed. Slowly, though, she was losing ground.
"No!" Twilight shouted and power exploded out of her, shredding the tentacles. "I've tried to be nice but I won't let my friends get hurt!" She unleashed a barrage of glowing arrows, a veritable storm of magic missiles. Dawn Gleaming shot many of them out of the air with her own barrage but enough got through to hit Marjorie somewhat, making her howl in anger.
"Wrecking BALL," Apple Bloom said cheerfully and a huge ball on a chain swung down and hit Marjorie, tossing her across the room.
"Pinkamena, which side are we on?" Madame LeFlour asked Pinkamena urgently.
"I... don't know," she mumbled, studying everything and looking worried.
"I'm on your side," Mr. Turnip said firmly to her and she smiled a little. "I'll always be your friend."
Pinkamena looked embarrassed by that. "Your wagon is wrecked," she said sadly.
"I can get a new one but I can't get a new you."
Pinkamena began to cry with Pinkie comforting her.
Marjorie flapped her wings and Twilight went tumbling, then she tried turning back to us, with Opalescence and Winona and Angel Bunny all growling at her. I did my best to move to protect Fluttershy as best I could.
Then Keraptis shouted, "I AM FREE!"
I could see Ivan standing by him, while Rarity chased Niccolo around with arrows. GO RARITY AND IVAN!
"Apple Bloom, hit the green and red buttons together!" Keraptis shouted.
WHAM she hit those buttons like the wrath of an angry immortal.
A force cage sprung up around Marjorie.
"Take your people and go," he said, striding up to her. "You've given me a good show but I will not be used as a pawn in your games any longer, Marquetta. And if you try again, I will call the Council of Intrusion and see what they think." ...
"You wouldn't dare," Marjorie hissed.
"I am THE TRAP MASTER!" Apple Bloom said, then quickly checked her flank. Still no Cutie Mark. She cursed.
"Do you really want to find out? You are pushing things, 'Marquetta'," Keraptis said angrily.
"Celestia has been 'pushing things' for centuries, and who are you to judge, MORTAL?" Marjorie hissed at Keraptis.
"I'm the mortal whose home you invaded and whose machines you perverted! I have to say, though, I'm impressed by the results." He studied the Elements of Power. "But the best creations are those that take on a life of their own beyond what you intended. Now, go or I will make you regret staying."
"Fine, but this is not the end. Tell Celestia, she will regret this. And you, 'Samus Marcus', you will die your final death soon and I will have my sword BACK. There is no one who can protect you from me, Marcus. Your luck cannot protect you forever. I know you now and I will find you. Enjoy your final days, for soon, they will END!"
And then she vanished with the Elements of Power, though I noticed Clarity's jewelry was left behind.
"What a good girl you are," Keraptis said to Apple Bloom. He produced a silver necklace which showed an Earth Pony rampant, hanging it around her neck. "You'll be a great trap maker one day, I think."
"Thank you!" she said, then checked her flank. No Cutie Mark yet. "AAAAHHH!!!"
He now worked the controls to turn off the chaos. "I'll secure the remaining treasure for you. You had best go see Celestia; I expect Marquetta will try something."
"Her name isn't really Marquetta either," I said, frowning. "She talked like she was an Immortal, though maybe she was just arrogant."
"I leave that as an exercise for Twilight's powerful brain," Keraptis said. "I can see why Celestia favors her." He sounded like he was talking about an old girlfriend's daughter.
Surely not.
"Sir, I will probably regret asking, but do you know what I am?" I said. If he says 'Erik', I die, but if he knows...
"Isn't it obvious?" he said.
"You were a candidate for immortality on the Path of the Polymath," Ivan said, coming over. "I don't know what went wrong, but I think everyone getting killed by Marquetta caused you to fail but for some reason you keep coming back now."
"That fits what I know," Keraptis said. "I'm sure Celestia can tell you more if you want to know."
I don't know if I want to know. "Was I abandoned by my patron?"
"Well, you... oh hoh," he said. "You definitely should see Celestia," he said after studying me.
"... Why?" I asked weakly.
"Her mark's on you. Interesting." ...
"She gave him a Cutie Mark?" Scootaloo asked jealously.
"There's a kind of tag on your soul which says 'MINE' in Celestia's handwriting," he said. He finished operating the controls and the control room was all cleaned up now, monsters and traps gone.
How did...
Then I remembered my cry in the dream. 'CELESTIA! HELP!!!!! I'll do anything! Don't let me get eaten!!!!'
Ahahahah.
Rarity now came up by my side; I put a hand on her back and smiled nervously.
"I will make a tunnel back to the balloon," Keraptis said. "It will be crowded, but you can head to take Vermicoritax his treasure. Apple Bloom, when you are old enough to live on your own, if you would like to come study with me, I think you have talent."
"COOL," she said. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle looked dubious.
Applejack looked dubious.
I can't blame her.
"We're going to go see a dragon? Cool!," Dinky said. "Can I drive again?"
"Oh, you operated it, Dinky?" Twilight said in surprise.
"Yes," Dinky said proudly. "I linked into the controls with my horn, just like you!"
"Well done, Dinky, but NEVER EVER take my balloon without asking!," Twilight said.
"Keraptis, did you somehow summon the Cutie Mark Crusaders?" Rarity asked him.
"I could not reach beyond the mountain while bound," Keraptis said. "Oh yes. My machines were used to make your evil twins. They need a patron of power in order to live beyond this mountain. If they lose Marjorie's favor, they may well evaporate unless they find another patron."
"Am I...," I began.
"You are real. You merely need a patron because many, many people want you dead," Keraptis said.
AHHAHAHAHAH.
"But Celly will take good care of you, I'm sure. As long as you like itching powder in your underwear." He laughed a little; Pinkie laughed a LOT.
"Wait," Pinkie said. "Is Marjorie patron to my old friends too?"
"Yes," Keraptis said.
Pinkie frowned, looking worried.
"I have gifts for a few of you," he said. "I wish I could reward you all but the Elements of Power and Marjorie looted most of my stock." Keraptis sighed. "Ivan, you freed me and I am grateful." He gestured and now he held a warhammer. "For you, the hammer Whelm. It will guide you to gold and silver and gems."
Rarity now studied it with interest.
"And it will help you to cast down evil humanoids," he continued."
Ivan took it; not his normal kind of weapon, but with those powers, likely quite useful.
"For Applejack..." He gestured and tiny shadows flowed from his hands along with purple sparkles into Applejack's horseshoes. "These horseshoes will never break or wear out and will let you safely kick anything, even things like lightning or fire."
"Thank you, sir," she said, smiling.
"For Twilight, two books of lore," Keraptis said. Twilight's eyes lit up. "They're an introduction to shadow magic."
"Oooh," she said, taking them.
"For the Cutie Mark Crusaders," Keraptis said. "And their friends..." He gestured and their cloaks flew off and floated over to him.
"Hey!" Scootaloo said.
Light and shadow fluttered across the cloaks. "Let these be your first steps on the road to glory," he said. He gestured and sent them back. "Now you have magical cloaks."
"AWESOME," Scootaloo said.
"For you, Fluttershy, a box of magical seeds. You need never be void of plant allies so long as these last." He whisked that over to her and she took it, smiling and thanking him.
"For you, Rainbow Dash, special goggles." He gestured and they flew onto her head. "They will protect your eyes and you will be able to see even in the darkest night."
"Sweet," she said. "Thanks, mr. Wizard!"
"For the rest of you, I'm afraid all I have left is these gems," Keraptis said apologetically. The rest of us got a bag of gems and coins. Which included ME, who needs money. So I was pretty happy. I have a magic sword, anyway.
A door opened. "Okay, there's a road to safety," Keraptis said. "I'll make sure you get all the treasure. Good luck with 'Marjorie'."
"Thank you sir," Twilight said, bowing.
"I suppose I have Asterius' mark on me," Ivan said thoughtfully.
"Oh yes, you do. Good luck with your quest."
Oh man, how are we going to get the lockpicks?
Ivan laughed nervously.
"Don't worry, we'll find a way to get you what you need, Ivan," Applejack said seriously to him.
"Man, I never got to show that idiot Crash I am the BEST," Dash grumbled.
"You are the best," I told her and she smiled brightly.
"Okay," Twilight said. "Round up the kids and let's go! We have a ton of things to do! First stop, the lair of Vermicoritax."
*****************
It took endless hours of Vermicoritax, Rarity, Applejack, and Twilight going over the hoard, item by item, to settle it all; the rest of us ran herd on the fillies to avoid trouble.
These children want to touch EVERYTHING, go EVERYWHERE, try EVERYTHING. I know human children are this hyper but they aren't as FAST.
Ivan was looking agitated. I can't blame him. We certainly can't rob Vermicoritax at this point; it would bring down retaliation on Equestria, not just us.
Finally, once the kids finally wore out and laid down by the pond which is inside Vermicoritax's underground lair (it's connected by a stream to the swamp and to underground rivers), we all could rest too. I flopped down next to Sweetie Belle and took a nap myself.
When I awoke, Applejack was standing over Ivan with something in her mouth which she dropped on him. "There you go," she said.
It was a set of platinum lockpicks, each inscribed with one of the phases of the moon. "We traded him the Cauldron of Blackflame for the lockpicks. He's the only one who isn't a halfling who has one now. He's quite proud of it."
Ivan's eyes were wide. "Thank you."
"Measure for measure," Applejack said. "You helped us out, so we helped you. So what happens next?"
"I don't know," he said, staring at them. "I guess Asterius will contact me when he's ready, as I just realized I don't know if I was supposed to take them somewhere or what. As I've been so focused on *getting* them."
Applejack laughed. "I know a few people more focused on the trip than the destination." She glanced at the Cutie Mark Crusaders, who thankfully were still asleep.
I didn't even have a destination, really. I just kind of survive. Part of me hopes Celestia knows more about what's going on with me and part is afraid she knows more.
Rarity nudged me gently. "Wake up, sleepyhead, it's time for us all to be massively overcrowded again." We'd had to have the CMC ride in Rarity's saddlebags when we ballooned here; it was just too crowded.
I sat up and now realized Sweetie Belle's head was on my legs. I patted her gently. "Wake up, little one."
"Five more minutes," she mumbled, but soon, she and her friends were up and we herded them along. The plan is to go to Ponyville, drop off the kids, rest, then go to Canterlot and see Celestia about all this.
The idea of a BATH and a NICE SOFT BED appeals to me more than you can imagine.
BED!!! |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book Four: Trust is a Leap in the Dark | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 4: Trust is a Leap in the Dark
By John Biles
***************
Twilight's balloon can be piloted by anyone who can cast spells (and any unicorn); I got to take a turn piloting it, which was fun, but also tiring; we had to take turns. Dinky seems to be a bit of an airhead, but she was a very good pilot, more precise than the rest of us who could pilot it (Twilight, Rarity, myself, Fluttershy, Pinkie, Sweetie Belle). Apparently her mother is a pegasus and her father is NOT TO BE TALKED ABOUT.
But must be a unicorn.
We could see Ponyville in the distance when a gray-coated pegasus rose out of the town and came zooming towards us. She had a blonde mane and googly eyes, but she looked VERY determined. "DINKY, YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!" she shouted.
You could hear rumblings from the saddlebag the kids were in.
Man, having a billion little dimensional pockets is very handy, I have to say.
We got Dinky out and Rarity told me, "That's Dinky's mother, Ditzy Doo."
"Hi, Mom, you look great," Dinky said cheerfully, though her body was shaking.
"Young lady, you are in SO MUCH TROUBLE," Ditzy said, eyes wandering all over. It was very distracting. She turned her head to point just one eye at Dinky. "And your friends who talked you into this! I am going to give them a piece of my MIND."
"You can chew them out tomorrow," Twilight said. "It's too crowded here to take them out."
Ditzy now noticed Ivan and I. "Humans?"
"Yes, we are," I said.
"This is Samus Marcus, a unicorn human," Rarity said. "And this is Ivan, who is an earth human."
Ditzy looked really intently at me, probably noticing the lack of a horn. She looked confused.
"A pleasure to meet you," I said, shaking one of her hooves.
Ditzy soon took Dinky and flew off with her; poor kid.
You know, we need to find out what caused them to have that dream. We never did find out.
*************
Soon, we landed in the middle of Ponyville; there was a huge mob of people and I noticed Lyra among the people; she was busy playing her harp and a bunch of ponies were singing.
"Lyra is our town bard," Rarity said, following our gaze. "She provides music for all festive occasions Ponyville has some other local musicians, but she's paid by the city government. She and Pinkie generally organize local festivities."
I'm surprised she hasn't gone wandering around more like I expected. But since I can't admit I was Erik, I can't ask her about it, more's the pity.
The tune now changed to one I knew.
o/~ Another day, another city,
o/~ Another horizon beckons to me.
o/~ Though home calls to me,
o/~ I must leave it behind.
What the hell???
Rarity's eyes widened as did Twilight.
o/~ Faithful wagon, carry me far
o/~ Faithful wagon, follow that star
o/~ You haul my goods and my fortune too
o/~ For I am a Far Seller
o/~ A traveler on the sea of fate
o/~ The needs of others beckon me
o/~ And I cannot be late.
Twilight licked her lips and began to sing along as we descended.
o/~ I've got twenty miles to go by twilight's gleaming.
o/~ Those distances can be deceiving.
o/~ The wheels go round and round,
o/~ Hauling me from town to town
Ivan to my surprise now began to sing as well, and Rarity joined in.
o/~ Faithful wagon, carry me far
o/~ Faithful wagon, follow that star
o/~ You haul my goods and my fortune too
o/~ For I am a Far Seller
o/~ A traveler on the sea of fate
o/~ The needs of others beckon me
o/~ And I cannot be late.
I surrendered and joined in, and then the other ponies with us all tried to sing along as well. Lyra looked VERY happy and I noticed a yellow earth pony with a blue and pink mane who had three candies as her Cutie Mark. Must be Bon-Bon.
By the time we finished the song, we had landed and tons of ponies flooded forward to say hello to everyone. Ivan and I were greeted by the Mayor of Ponyville. "Welcome to Ponyville," she said. "Celestia told us you were coming. She wishes for you all to come to Canterlot tomorrow, along with the Cutie Mark Crusaders."
"Oh dear," Rarity said. "They don't need that much punishment."
"I'm sure she'll be gentle," the Mayor said. "Should I arrange housing for our guests?"
"Marcus can stay with Sweetie and I, and I think Ivan will be staying with Applejack," Rarity said.
"Okay," the Mayor said. We shook hand-to-hoof. "Nice to meet you, Samus Marcus. Celestia told me about your human customs, so you can be sure you'll be left alone when bathing."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
She knows, she knows, I am going to DIE.
I kept my face blank. "Thank you. I hate to be an inconvenience."
"I understand," she said kindly. "We have a feast ready! Come and dine!"
It was quite good; they had some fish for Ivan and I, which was very nice and while some of the food was not edible for humans (like hay salad), a lot of it was (the tomato salad was very nice and I like cucumbers a lot.)
Eventually, I approached Lyra because I had to know. "Interesting choice of human music," I told her. "Why that song?"
"I needed something human that wasn't a love song," Lyra said. "Nothing wrong with love songs, of course, but I wanted something that evoked travel and wasn't a love song. Also, there's some nice choral things you can do with it."
"It was a good choice," I told her. "Ivan and I knew it, though neither of us is Darokinian."
"I heard something about my old professor being at White Plume Mountain?" she said.
"You studied with Keraptis?" I said, feigning confusion.
"No, Erik of Vestland. I dunno, apparently he's wanted for a bunch of crimes, but he was a good teacher and didn't do anything wrong while he was there," she said, frowning. "Was he there?"
"We heard he was there, but Keraptis said he didn't know when Spitfire asked him about it. They tried searching the dungeon but didn't see him anywhere," I told her. Thankfully, it was a visual search.
Damn that tattoo.
The feast finally wound down and I was utterly zonked, so I was glad when it was time to go home and SLEEP.
***********
I took a bath so I would not have to sleep filthy. It was just a shower but that was fine. Rarity quickly improvised me a nice robe to sleep in; it was simple but felt wonderfully soft. I left my feet barefoot; I wanted to stretch my toes.
Shut up.
Sweetie Belle stared at my toes. "What use are those?" she asked.
"Not much any more, though they can help when you climb," I told her. "Our distant ancestors had smaller feet and bigger toes to help them climb and grip things. Once we started walking upright all the time, they got less useful and shrank. The same way our claws turned into toenails and fingernails."
She touched one of my toes hesitantly with her hoof. I wiggled them and she smiled. I then showed off my hands to her; she sniffed them and then studied them. "That must make picking things up easy," she said.
"It's what they are for," I told her.
She nodded and touched them. "It's not so hard for us Unicorns when we grow up but I know Pegasi and Earth Ponies... well, they can kind of pick things up but they have a harder time of it."
"Still learning to use your magic?" I asked.
"I haven't found my cutie mark yet," she said mournfully.
"I'm sure you will soon," I told her. "I didn't have your kind of ambition when I was little. And humans never get a cutie mark."
"But you can do magic and everything I do always goes wrong," Sweetie said mournfully. "I can't even help out my sister. And Apple Bloom figured out the controls when the rest of us couldn't."
"Those cloaks you made were very nice," I told her. "I can tell your friends love them."
She smiled a little at that.
"Here, let me show you a trick you can show off to your friends," I told her, getting my cards.
I then carefully showed her one of my simple card tricks. She can't do much with her horn yet, but she can move cards, which is enough for this. We went over it again and again, until she learned how to do it.
Finally...
She spread the cards and I picked one. The Jack of Flames. Then I put it back in and she 'shuffled'. Knowing the trick, I could see how she manipulated it to the bottom of the deck, but it should fool other fillies and the uninitiated.
Then she faked shuffling while keeping it on the bottom, then turned it up. "Is this your card?" she asked nervously.
"Yes! Perfect!"
She smiled brightly and I smiled back, ruffling her hair.
Then she rushed off to find Rarity, who was busy making the bed. "Rarity, Rarity, I'm going to show you something cool!"
She began showing off the trick to Rarity, who looked suitably impressed when it worked. I tried not to nod off against the wall, where I was sitting.
It suddenly hit me. "Where am I sleeping?" I asked. I was so tired, I couldn't even remember how many rooms Rarity's boutique had or how I had gotten into her bedroom.
"Sweetie has a room at my sister's place, but when she stays here, she just sleeps with me. I have a very big bed, so there will be plenty of space for us as long as everyone sleeps on their back." Rarity paused, suddenly nervous. "If that's okay."
"It's fine," I said. "I'm close to falling asleep right here." My head lolled and I forced it back up.
"Why do humans wear clothing all the time?" Sweetie asked me.
Here we go again. I gave her my standard spiel.
"I guess you do laundry a lot," she said thoughtfully.
"Yes," I told her. When we can. I often end up living in filth, unfortunately.
I am so clean. I feel like I could do anything.
Right now, though, the main thing is SLEEP.
Bedtime was a demonstration of the ability of Ponies to be more flexible than ponies. I'm pretty sure non-sentient ones sleep on their sides, but Ponies can comfortably sleep on their backs. Sweetie was, as Ponies usually are, naked, while Rarity donned a fancy silken pink and crimson robe. (My own was sky blue, if you care.) Sweetie slept between us; it felt oddly like being a father sleeping with his child.
Or so I would imagine, as I have no kids to my knowledge.
"I need a bedtime story," Sweetie announced, just as we settled into bed.
Rarity made 'not again' noises. "Big ponies don't need a story before bed," she said.
"It's fine, I'll tell her one," I said. "You get the glass of water."
"Glass of water?" Rarity asked. "Oh, right."
Kids always want a glass of water before bed. Or a snack. Or to pet the dog or whatever.
Okay, story time.
**************
Once upon a time, there was a young pony who wanted to buy her mother a present. But she had no money, so she had to go get a job. Mr. Wall needed his house painted, so she took the job and started working hard, but it was taking FOREVER.
Then two of the town bullies showed up and started mocking her painting and this made her mad. So she said, "I'd like to see you do a better job of it!"
They each painted a swathe of the wall, and she had to admit, "You did a better job." It was really embarrassing BUT...
It meant she'd gotten them to do some of the work for her, so she didn't mind. She knew it didn't matter what other people thought about her, she liked herself. And if she could use their illusions about her to get stupid mean people to do what she wanted, EVEN BETTER.
{Rarity now interrupted storytime.}
**********
Rarity had returned with the glass of water. "Marcus darling, you shouldn't tell Sweetie a bedtime story about conning people."
"But it's better than using violence to deal with bullies," I told Rarity as Sweetie took the water and began drinking.
"But..." Rarity paused, standing by the bed, holding the cup up with her powers for Sweetie. "Okay, that is true, but you shouldn't encourage children to trick people."
"Not everyone," I said. "But some people don't deserve better treatment." Like the kids I have heard harass Sweetie and her friends. "Sweetie has to learn when to be cunning."
Sweetie said nothing, busy slurping down water.
"Sweetie is very charming and kind," Rarity said, smiling a little. Then she sighed. "But cunning isn't her style."
"Well, for humans, anyway, you have to decide what you want and work for it. No one starts out cunning, you become cunning. It's all about discipline and focus," I said. Let's see her protest discipline and focus!
Sweetie continued drinking and Rarity said, "Well, of course discipline and focus are a good thing. Dedication to my craft got me my cutie mark and it's continued to improve me. But ponies aren't supposed to trick each other. Even if the other pony is mean."
"It's better to trick your enemies than to hit them," I said.
Sweetie was now pretending to drink and looking nervously between us.
"I wasn't saying to hit them! You just have to ignore mean things bullies say," Rarity said, frowning. "Or throw a few zingers their way. But trying to trick them into doing your work is going too far. If someone pays you to do work and you get someone else to do it for you, you're ripping off the person who paid you." Her voice was VERY firm about this.
"But he's still getting his wall painted," I told her.
"The worker is worthy of his hire," Rarity said. "The person who *does* the work ought to get paid."
"Does that mean businesses that hire out workers are ripping off someone?" I asked. "The wages get paid to the boss, who only pays the employee who did the work part of the profit."
We now got into a long discussion of business ethics which Sweetie continued to pretend to be drinking the whole time and looking uncomfortable.
It made me wonder what exactly was the point of divergence of Rarity and Clarity. There was enough similarity to make the differences more stark. The clones seem to have full sets of memories, they know their own kin and the friends of said kin... what exactly makes them different?
I think we had reached discussing bonds and investment depreciation somehow when Sweetie made a huge yawn and said, "I'm finished and sleepy."
Rarity said, "I'll be right back."
She headed out with the glass.
"I'm sorry I made you fight," Sweetie said weakly to me.
"It's okay, no matter how close you are to someone, sometimes you're going to disagree," I told Sweetie. "You make up your own mind about how to deal with the bullies. But now you've heard a couple of ways to do it."
"You're a stallion, right?" Sweetie asked, yawning.
"Yes, I am," I told her. "I guess you don't see many humans here."
"Humans either come to the ports or border forts or ride the Canterlot-Manehattan line up to Canterlot," she said groggily. "We're kind of off the beaten track, unless you want to go up to Castle Neigh. Daddy sees humans a lot, though. He's in Grand Stalls."
"Sleep," I said softly to her. "You can tell me about him in the morning."
"He's the best Daddy ever and I miss him so much," Sweetie said groggily. "But he says Grand Stalls is no place for a filly. I wish he could stay here with me."
I felt jealous; I can't even remember my father's name clearly... there's a half dozen different names and faces are jumbled and I just know there were too many kids, so I had to seek my fortune. "I bet he's telling your mother how much he misses you right this minute."
"I miss Mommy too," she said softly, then her eyes closed and she fell asleep.
I heard Rarity climbing into bed as I passed out as well.
*****************
I dreamed of Canterlot and my days there. I lived in a sort of hotel/dorm for professors. About half the teachers lived off campus but each of us who did not had a nice suite of rooms. It was some of the plushest living of my life. So nice.
I awoke to the smell of fish and fried tomatoes Mmm, good. I also was being crushed by Sweetie Belle, who had grappled me in her sleep. "Sweetie, wake up," I said.
She mumbled into my shoulder.
I tried to rise and failed. "Sweetie!"
Mumble, mumble.
Ponies really shouldn't trust strangers so much as to hug them in their sleep. But...
Opalescence came in and jumped on my face.
I made an incoherent, strangled noise and Rarity ran in. "Opalescence, get off Marcus and Sweetie!"
Opalescence ran down my chest, then jumped off.
Sweetie stirred. "Mrwwwe?"
I rose from the bed now, disentangling myself. "I'm going to go shave," I said.
"I can shave you, I've seen how Mom does it for Dad," Sweetie said.
Rarity licked her lips nervously. "Sweetie, it's a dangerous job."
"It's okay," I said. Sweetie needs some self-confidence. "You can help me."
I was rather nervous. The part of me which is kind to children thought this a great idea. The part which is wary of a wobbly child-unicorn holding a blade to my throat was rather less enthused.
But she needs some confidence, I can tell. So we went to the bathroom and I lathered up. She had to stand on the privy to see well, which was a little amusing to me. Then I lathered up and she took the razor and very slowly, she moved it over to my face, looking nervous.
I used my own power to steady the blade and guide her. "Someone's helping me," she said, confused.
"It's me," I told her. "I am a unicorn human. We'll do it together."
I guided her; slowly, I felt her control get more steady and sure and so, bit by bit, I released my grip. By the end, it was all her doing it, while I just watched.
It was not the greatest shave ever but it was good enough. "Good job," she said, smiling.
"Why can't I see your horn?" she asked.
"It's invisible," I told her. I should not have said that but I couldn't help myself. "There was an accident."
"Oh," she said.
Too trusting for her own good.
But she was smiling. "You're a nice unicorn," she said.
"Thank you," I told her. "You're a very nice unicorn too."
She smiled even brighter.
I suddenly wondered if our evil twins still had the goatees. Hehe.
I now washed my face to get left over lather off.
We came out for breakfast, which we ate in the kitchen. Rarity's shop seems to basically have a storage room, a bedroom, a bathroom, a kitchen, and the front store. You can tell it's a single person's home, even with the box of toys in the bedroom.
Sweetie and I came out and dug into the food. Rarity looked a little nervous. "The fish is great," I told her and she relaxed. You know, she's probably never cooked fish before.
In fact, I suddenly wondered how she even had fish. But that wasn't worth worrying about.
"We will have to hurry," she said. "You two slept in."
"You should have woken me," I said. "I'm sorry."
"I would have, but you two looked so cute sleeping there and when I did try, you just mumbled about grades."
FUCK ME.
Rarity and Sweetie were having fried tomato and fruit slices on a mix of kinds of lettuce. I had some of that with fish. SO GOOD. "This is really good," I said. "Fresh food, home cooked, I am clean, I am wearing clean clothing, I feel alive again."
Rarity smiled brightly and Sweetie said, "Thanks, sis. I'll cook breakfast tomorrow."
"We'll be in the castle, dear," Rarity said. "They'll cook for us."
"I am SO EXCITED," Sweetie said urgently. "I've never been to Canterlot! Surely we'll discover our Cutie Marks there!"
"Luna wants us to see the Moon Raising tonight," Rarity said. "I have never seen it myself. Apparently, it will be something extra special tonight."
Only now did I think... "Wait, did I sleep through us cutting a deal with Vermicoritax? Because we had to get the treasure for him to be willing to talk, let alone negotiate."
"He is going to come meet with Celestia and Luna; he is rather cross over 'Princess Marjorie' trying to set him up for a war with Equestria," Rarity said.
Hah, your plan bit you back, Marjorie! Or Marquetta, or whoever you are.
I hope she doesn't invade my dreams again.
"I forgot to ask what my magical cape DOES," Sweetie suddenly said, then sighed.
"Show me," I told her. "I can try and figure it out."
I ate and studied her cloak when she brought it. "Very strong protection against cold," I told her. "And if you pull the hood up, it'll help you sneak around. Also, it has some mild help in avoiding getting hurt by magics and poisons and the like." Basic protection enchantments. "It won't make you invincible, but it ups the odds of avoiding being hurt."
"COOL," she said and put it on, then started sneaking around. Your vision glanced off it unless you really concentrated hard.
Rarity buried her face in her hooves.
"What's wrong?"
"They're hard enough to herd already," Rarity mumbled. ...
"I have to go tell everyone!" Sweetie said.
"Finish your breakfast, then pack for the trip, THEN you can go," Rarity said.
"But I might forget by then!" Sweetie said.
I touched her forehead and used a little magic. It didn't actually do anything but she would feel it. "There you go, a memory spell. You won't forget."
She just shoved her face in her food and grazed at high speed instead of eating delicately as Rarity did.
"Sweetie, show some manners! You don't see Marcus grazing!"
"Apple Bloom grazes and so does Scootaloo," Sweetie said stubbornly. "It's natural for ponies."
"We are ponies of refinement," Rarity said. "Civilized people do not just shove their face in the punch bowl or their plate."
Sweetie grumbled, looking frustrated.
"You should be glad you're not a non-sentient pony," I told Sweetie. "You'd be spending hours and hours a day eating, more if you just had grass to eat."
Sweetie stared at me. "Are they all hideously fat?"
"Small stomachs and grass isn't very nutritious, even for a herbivore. If they have things like oats and rye and apples, they don't have to eat as much. I'm guessing that probably you all have more efficient stomachs and may well be partly fed by magic." Then I held up a piece of fish. "One of the reasons humans eat meat is that it conveys a lot of energy in a small package."
I think there's some business with a second stomach or something but I don't know horse biology in that level of detail.
Sweetie ate as fast as she could with any pretension to dignity. It was a weak pretension; she then ran off to pack.
"I wish I had more time to make you some nice outfits," Rarity said.
I jingled my coin and gem pack. "If we stay in Canterlot long, I can buy an outfit or two," I told her. I suddenly wondered what happened to all the clothing I had when I was Erik; I abandoned most of it in my flight. "Though I'd rather have something nice made by you, fair Rarity."
"Flatterer," she said, but she smiled.
"Is Apple Bloom's necklace magic?" Sweetie shouted.
"I don't know," I shouted back.
"Don't shout between rooms," Rarity shouted, then laughed softly, shaking her head.
"Best not to give orders you violate by giving them," I said.
"Are human children difficult?" Rarity asked me.
"Oh yes. We have to tame our own children and guide them. It's a huge amount of work," I told her. "Also, human children get into ANYTHING very easily, thanks to hands."
She looked off towards the bedroom door, then at me, then ate some more of her breakfast. She started to speak, then fell silent.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"Later, when we can have privacy," she said. "We have to assume Sweetie can and will appear at any time while she's under our care."
I scratched my head, then nodded and worked on breakfast. She told me about Ponyville and her family and various friends.
Distantly, I now hear the sound of a pony laughing maniacally. And knocking at the back door, which goes straight into Rarity's bedroom.
"Look what I can do with my tail!" Apple Bloom shouted in the bedroom. "I bet I could even carry an axe and chop wood now!"
"Oh wow, that's great, Apple Bloom," Sweetie said. "Can you help me pack?"
"Sure... WITH MY TAIL!"
I couldn't help but laugh.
Rarity looked curious. "That's new."
"I noticed Applejack has a prehensile tail. Is that common with Earth Ponies?"
"Usually only for things relating to their Cutie Mark," Rarity said. "Which can be pretty broad. I'd be surprised if she somehow got her Cutie Mark after coming home, though."
"Here, let me get that... with my tail!" Apple Bloom crowed.
I laughed softly. Rarity smiled.
"Oh, one other thing from yesterday," I said. "What is an Oard?"
Rarity buried her face in her hooves. "Oards are imaginary creatures that Ditzy and Dinky both think are real. They're supposedly time travelers who are trying to change Mystara's history using super-technology. They feature in the kind of crazy conspiracy theories you find in the Hoofington Inquirer," she said. "Where they claim Duke Stefan's been replaced by a clone made of snow and that's why he doesn't move against the Black Eagle Baron or that the Thyatian Emperor is addicted to cheese and thus is controlled by cheese-makers from the Heldaan Freeholds, and so on."
"AHH," I said. It's probably for the best I haven't the resources to disguise myself as one or I would find myself unable to resist the impulse to go do it and freak them out. "I assume we are going to catch the afternoon train to Canterlot?"
"I think so," Rarity said.
If we leave by noon, we can be in Canterlot before dinnertime on the train. It'll be nice to relax on the train.
And less crowded than the balloon.
"Here, I'll get that down for you with... MY TAIL!" Apple Bloom crowed.
"We're all going to want to kill her by sunset, right?" I said.
"Oh yes," Rarity said, laughing a little. "But it's important to celebrate their learning new skills, so try to be patient and hold me back if I snap, darling." She took a drink of milk. "Marcus darling, about last night, I'm sorry."
La.. OH. "It's okay," I told her. "Everyone disagrees sometimes. I hope I didn't get too heated. I just didn't know any stories suitable for pony children, so I had to improvise."
I heard weird noises from the bedroom. Springing and shaking noises.
o/~ With my tail,
o/~ I will help you without fail!
o/~ I can even send mail,
o/~ With my tail! ...
"Don't jump on the bed," Rarity shouted.
I laughed softly.
"I can shave people now," Sweetie Belle said proudly now.
"Oooh, magically?" Apple Bloom said excitedly.
"Yes!"
"Maybe you'll get a grooming Cutie Mark soon!" Apple Bloom said excitedly.
"You need to PACK," Rarity shouted. "They're so easily distracted," she said to me.
I finished my food. "I can run herd on them while you clean up."
"Thanks," she said and I went to try to restore order.
Foolish me.
**************
I never, EVER should have told them about the sneaking thing. Foolish me. By the time it was time to go, Ditzy, Rarity, and myself were chasing all five crusaders around Rarity's house as they tried to hide from us and laughed like maniacs.
This might well have continued until we all died of old age, except that Applejack showed up with Ivan and her brother, Big Macintosh, and they helped us herd the kids. Pretty quickly, we trapped them all and stopped Apple Bloom trying to pick up Opalescence with her tail.
"Leave the poor cat alone," Applejack said sternly to Apple Bloom. "I know you're proud of yourself, but Opalescence is not a toy. And don't abuse your cloaks, or we'll have to take them away until you're older."
"I am older! I'm a BIG PONY," Apple Bloom insisted. "Look at my tail!"
"I can shave people now!" Sweetie protested.
Scootaloo looked kind of frustrated, possibly because Apple Bloom and Sweetie couldn't resist mentioning tails and shaving every five seconds, roughly.
"I'm proud of you," Applejack said. "But you don't have to mention it constantly." She sounded a little worn out of it already.
I laughed softly.
"Marcus, you got a minute?" Applejack asked me.
"Sure," I said.
"Big Mac, make sure they don't decide to go find another dungeon before we get back," Applejack said.
"I can shave you!" Sweetie said excitedly.
His eyes widened and I said to Big Mac, "It's fine. She shaved me this morning." As I passed him, I whispered to Big Mac, "As long as she believes she can do it, she'll be fine. Just reassure her and she'll do great."
He nodded and I went outside with Applejack. "Need something magicked?" I asked.
"Can you take a look, make sure Apple Bloom ain't got nothing magical in her head? Somethin' tricked her and her friends into comin', and I'm pretty sure it ain't Luna. I don't want to see her and her friends rush off on some other damn fool dangerous thing again in the future."
"Of course, though Twilight would do a better job."
"The more what look, the safer," Applejack said. "And check the amulet, make sure it's safe."
The amulet turned out to augment an Earth Pony's fine manipulation abilities; this was likely why she'd so quickly gotten so proficient with her tail. There were no signs of continuing enchantment, but I had to agree with Applejack that someone had played them. Why and to what end?
Ditzy was talking urgently to Rarity as I studied the kids, who had basically overborne Big Mac and were busy trying to pretty him up. "I totally have nothing to wear for this," Ditzy said. "And neither does Dinky and I am supposed to work today and they gave it off but I don't know how long I have to stay there and.." She was growing ever more frantic and her eyes ever more googly as she panicked.
"I don't have time to do a proper job, darling, but of course I'll see what I can throw together before we have to catch the train," Rarity said. "Sweetie, are you packed?"
"Sort of."
"Sweetie, get packed. Children, are you all packed? Do you have your bags?"
A chorus of yeses broke out.
"Do you have your permission slip, Twist, Scootaloo?"
"I have mine!" Scootaloo said.
"I..um... oh no, I left it at home!" Twist said in a panic.
Rarity magicked some bits over to Scootaloo. "Scootaloo, run Twist home, then go by the grocery store and get six boxes of raisins."
Raisins?
They took off.
"Sweetie, get your bags packed. Apple Bloom, you can come assist me with... your tail," she said with a dramatic flourish. Rarity is a bit of a ham. "Dinky, Ditzy, come, you will need to be fitted. Marcus darling, come, I'll see what I can do for you too. Applejack, Big Mac, I hate to ask, but I could trouble you to clean up my kitchen? I can't leave it like this but I am going to be very busy."
"Glad to help, Rarity," Applejack said.
With Apple Bloom and I assisting, Rarity threw together an extra outfit for me, Ditzy, and Dinky. She was extremely not happy with any of them, though they looked fine to me. "I'm so sorry, you all deserve better, but I simply don't have time to give these the care they deserve."
I had a nice green suit to go with my hat, and Dinky and Ditzy each got a golden dress with green trim. Apple Bloom looked as proud of herself as if she'd done all the work on her own, her tail swishing everywhere.
We all assembled at the train station, dressed up and fancy looking. "Nice tux," I told Spike.
"Thank you," he said curtly.
I don't know what to do at all. I'd like to be on good terms with Spike, but he's really unhappy with me, unfortunately.
The Wonderbolts had already flown to Canterlot, but to my surprise, we were joined by Lyra and Bon-Bon. "Hello, everyone," Lyra said cheerfully. "Celestia's summoned us."
I blinked. That's unusual. "Maybe she wants you to join her orchestra."
"She already has a really good harpist," Lyra said. Then her eyes widened and she started to sweat.
"I already know about Octavia, dear," Bon-Bon said, though there was just a touch of... cracking the whip to it.
"Who?" Applejack asked curiously.
"She's the double-bass player for Celestia's orchestra," Twilight said. "She used to be Lyra's girlfriend, but something happened." She looked meaningfully at Lyra.
"Ha. Ahaha. HAHAHAHA," Lyra laughed nervously.
I felt a mix of sympathy and amusement that someone OTHER than me was freaking out.
"She wouldn't come to Boasttown?" I said adding the appropriate lyrical lilt to it. It's an allusion to one of Lyra's favorite songs. Which can be roughly summed up as 'Man: Woman I love, please come to where I am now living and chasing my dreams. Woman: Stop faffing about and come home to me'. The song ends unresolved whether he's coming home or not.
I had meant to tease, but Lyra looked like I'd punched her in the face, and now I felt guilty. Bon-Bon glared hate at me and I stumbled back a step. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that to come off mean."
"No, you're right," Lyra said, and sighed. "I didn't quite realize how serious she was, and then when I did finally get off my ass and got moving... it was messy. She had a steady stall, and I was ready to travel and..." She studied the platform. "It was kind of ugly. I hope she's not still mad at me."
"She was very, very cross," Twilight said. "You might want to avoid her."
"I have a clever plan," Pinkie said, and got out several things. Lyra now had a blue wig on, glasses, a fake nose, and a mustache attached to the nose. "She will NEVER recognize you like this." ...
"I will NOT let her do anything," Bon-Bon said firmly. "Pinkie, please take that ludicrous thing off Lyra."
Pinkie looked disappointed, and now Apple Bloom removed them from Lyra and handed them to Pinkie. "There you go," she said proudly.
Bon-Bon blinked. "Nicely done, Apple Bloom."
"So you're a musician?" Lyra asked me curiously.
"I'm an envoy of Celestia," I told her. "I do a little of everything. Magic, history, music, swordsmanship, and so on."
I prayed this wouldn't remind her of Erik.
"Humans do seem to dabble in everything," Lyra said. "Twilight and I knew a guy like that."
LET'S NOT DISCUSS HIM.
"Erik of Vestland?" Applejack asked curiously. "Some people we encountered at White Plume Mountain thought there were two of him there."
"Marjorie must have cloned him," Twilight said, frowning. "I expect the evil clone is the one who committed all those crimes he's been accused of."
Lyra and Bon-Bon looked at each other with the 'Twilight is rationalizing' look. Lyra, however, softened. "He seemed like a good guy to me. You had to kind of trick him into having fun sometimes, but that did make him a better match for you, Twilight, as you're the same way."
"You don't have to trick me into having fun!" Twilight said. "I can be LOTS of fun!"
"We just DRAG you into having lots of fun," Spike said, grinning.
I did NOT have to be dragged into having fun! I am all about FUN.
"He loved to sing and dance but he'd pretend he didn't," Lyra said. "So you had to trick him into it or make him think it was educational." ...
"That song WAS educational!" Twilight protested.
"But you're the same way," Lyra said, clearly back on steady ground.
The train now pulled into the station, and we all boarded, and got ready to go.
**************
I ended up designated Sweetie and Twist wrangler. Twist wasn't hard to keep under control; all you had to do was talk to her. But Sweetie wanted to wander all over the train car, and so did the rest of her friends. It didn't help that Sweetie kept trying to go show her new card trick to everyone on the train car; some were amused but others were annoyed and I got a lot of confused stares every time I had to herd her back. And Apple Bloom had to show off, and Scootaloo was grumping and Dinky kept trying to explain to every adult in sight about what they had to do to keep their timeline from being changed.
We were halfway to Canterlot and I was already worn out and had apologized to what felt like hundreds of ponies. Fortunately, I am smooth and gracious, so we didn't have a riot.
One gentleman, old with grey coat and grey mane, studied me after I got Sweetie out of his face. "Who are you?" he asked.
"Samus Marcus, envoy of Celestia. We're on our way to report on a diplomatic mission."
"With children?" he said curiously.
"Sweetie is Rarity's sister," I said.
"And you are?" he said curiously, after glancing at Rarity.
Didn't I already say my name? "Samus Marcus, envoy of Celestia," I said, hoping he wasn't asking something else I didn't get.
He gave me an odd look. "I am Silver Lining," he said. "I was just visiting my son and his children in Ponyville."
"Are you related to Silver Fountain, by any chance?" I asked, remembering where Apple Blossom had gone.
He brightened. "Why yes, I am. My sister runs a school for young fillies and colts in Manehattan. A finishing school." He studied the rampaging children. "These kids could use such an education."
My brain now clicked. He's the grandfather of one of the brats who gives Sweetie and her friends trouble. Stay calm, show no anger. "I'm surprised your granddaughter doesn't attend there."
"She should," he said, frowning. "But my son doesn't want her to leave home. It would do her good to see a proper city."
I carefully plied him for information about his family. I don't know when or where I'll need it, but information is power and leverage.
Eventually, though, I had to go chase down Sweetie again when she tried to wander into the next train car.
I'm sorry, everyone else on this train, we're doing our best.
***************
Canterlot was as beautiful as I remembered, though I did not remember it smelling so much like cinnamon. Cinnamon typically comes from the Divinarchy of Yav, southwest of Sind, which is west of Equestria. It's not super-expensive, but it isn't super-common either, due to the transport costs.
Ditzy cocked her head. "Someone must have dropped an air shipment. It's filtering down from above."
It seemed to be boosting sales of cinnamon rolls. I bought some for all the kids when they asked, though Ditzy more or less forced me to take compensation from her for the one I bought for Dinky. This kept the kids quiet as we herded them through the streets.
Score!
I also got some for myself and Rarity; nice, warm, tasty. They love their treats in Equestria.
We were most of the way to the castle, when Scootaloo said irritably to Apple Bloom, "Looks like you've got icing and sugar... on your tail."
"Oh man," Apple Bloom said in frustration. "I'm gonna have to go to the castle with ICING ON."
"On your tail," the other kids chorused, laughing.
"Pinkie to the rescue!" Pinkie said, then licked it all off Apple Bloom's tail until it shined. ...
Umm... problem... solved.
Applejack's eyes crossed. I don't blame you. "Pinkie, that's kind of tacky."
"Sweet and cinnamony!" Pinkie said.
I slid over to Rainbow Dash. "Hey, Dash," I whispered. "I think Scootaloo could do with some cheering up and you're the one to do it."
She looked at Scootaloo, then nodded. "I've got just the idea."
She came over to Scootaloo. "Want to ride ahead to the castle with me? I'm gonna go make sure Soarin' is doing okay."
"SURE!" Scootaloo said excitedly; she clambered onto Rainbow Dash's back and they raced off at high speed.
A little while later, we heard alarms going off at the castle. ...
"Hurry!" Twilight said and everyone took off at high speed.
More precisely, the adult ponies left the rest of us behind while the fillies and Ivan and I tried and failed to keep up to ponies running full tilt. Apple Bloom and Twist pulled ahead of myself, Dinky, and Sweetie. Then Ditzy came back, grabbed Dinky, and flew ahead.
Sweetie looked quite frustrated and now I lost Apple Bloom and Twist in the crowd. Well, crap.
"I'm sorry," Sweetie said to me.
"Sorry for what?" I said.
"That I can't run faster, so you have to stay back and watch over me," she said.
"We can't run faster either," Ivan confessed and now Sweetie looked a little happier.
I could fly but I'd best save it.
Everyone was panicking due to the alarms, and finally, I picked up Sweetie and tucked her into her own saddlebags, then slung those over my shoulder. She stuck her head out which looked pretty amusing.
"Aaah, help!" I heard Apple Bloom shout.
Oh bloody hell. I ran like a madman, pressing myself in time to see a blue maned, green coated earth pony stallion wearing a hat rather like a thimble with a rim, trying to drag Apple Bloom and Twist along; he wore a copper medallion shaped like a star with a school inscribed on it.
"Time for you two to go to school!" the stallion insisted. But he couldn't grip both their tails with his teeth and he kept trying to talk, which turned them loose.
I flashed my diplomatic papers at him. "Queen Celestia has invited them to see her," I told him. "The rest of the delegation ran ahead."
He studied us suspiciously "On a school day?"
School was out for the summer in Ponyville, I think. I guess in the city you don't need a summer break. "Yes, sir. School is out in Ponyville."
"I TOLD YOU," Apple Bloom shouted.
"Be respectful to the officer," I told her. She blinked at me, then grimaced.
"We're sorry, sir, the Queen needs to see us," Twist said respectfully. "Have some licorice." She tossed him a length and he took it and ate it.
I herded them along. "Be respectful to your elders," I told Apple Bloom. "If you mouth off, it puts their back up and they will resist what you want. But if you push their buttons, they'll be more inclined to be merciful."
Apple Bloom looked thoughtful, and Twist said, "I tried to be respectful, but he wouldn't listen."
"Well, not every tactic works every time." I sighed. "Anyway, don't run ahead. We'll catch up to the others soon."
The alarms stopped and I relaxed. Probably the party took down the threat. Which is good as children shouldn't be herded into danger. But I couldn't leave them behind, either.
We soon arrived at the gates, where my diplomatic credentials got some stares but let me in. The royal orchestra was in the courtyard performing, while Moondancer led a group of ponies in a dance. No one was singing but I recognized the tune. It was a song about a man who abandoned the woman who loved him and DIED HORRIBLY as a result.
Ahahah.
Everyone else was here; Dash and Scootaloo looked rather embarrassed. I don't know why, given they haven't... Dammit, Celestia.
I let Sweetie out of the bag now and gave it back to her. I've taught most of the ponies who were dancing. They're all from the bardic program, of course.
Please, no one, recognize me!
Lyra had a smile on her face, but I could see her tension. Bon-Bon was studying Octavia and looking cranky. I prayed there would be no big explosion.
And now Luna came out when they finished. "Welcome to Canterlot, Elements of Harmony, Cutie Mark Crusaders, and other friends. I am happy to see you all and I welcome you here. Celestia and I want you to dine with us tonight, and then attend the Moon Raising Ceremony. But Moondancer will show you to your quarters first. We will all meet in private after the ceremony." Her voice was musical and cheerful and soft.
I bowed to her, as did Ivan and everyone else.
"Marcus, if you would come with me, I would be grateful," Luna said.
Oh FUCK ME.
"I attend you eagerly, Princess Luna. I live to serve." I gave my voice its best courtly flair.
The fact that Applejack looked amused by this undercut me a bit, but I tried to ignore that and prayed this was not DEATH TIME.
**************
We passed various offices in which ponies were hard at work, until we came to a large one with an actual secretary in front; we went to the back and she told the secretary not to let anyone else in.
If this is where I die, at least I have a HAT on.
Her secretary poured us each a glass of a silvery liquid and laid out a small plate of donuts with white icing. Then she darted out to wait in her office in front.
Luna sat down behind her desk and I plopped down in a nice comfy chair, then suddenly wondered why she had a chair for guests when most of her guests couldn't sit in a human style chair.
She pushed a large piece of square glass on her desk to one side. It was odd, like she'd erected a window on a crystal stand in the middle of her desk.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," she said. "Celly speaks very well of you, and I see she's put her mark on you."
AHAHAHAH.
"What exactly does that mean?" I said. "I sort of... begged her for help against Marquetta, but I didn't know I had a mark until Keraptis told me."
"Is he still as crazy as ever?" she asked.
"Yes, definitely. Maybe more," I said.
"Celly has placed you under her protection," Luna said. "To certain kinds of beings, it is a beacon to back off. For most creatures, it won't matter, they can't notice. Given my suspicions about 'Marquetta', I expect she can tell."
"Is she a Draconic Immortal?" I asked.
"She is probably a mortal identity of the Moon Dragon," Luna said, eyes flashing. "We have had several past clashes with her." She ate a donut fiercely and sipped her drink.
I tried mine; it was definitely alcoholic with a bit of a minty tang to it. And very smooth. "What is this?" I asked.
"Liquid moonlight, fermented into wine," Luna said. ...
"She is not the person I most hate, but I certainly hate her," Luna said, acid in her voice.
I shrank back in my chair and she looked embarrassed, her voice reverting to its usual gentleness. "I am very sorry. I have a bit of a temper, though usually I can control it."
"It's okay," I lied, trying to soothe my nerves. "You told me in the letter about your wrath."
"Oh, Luna is very kind and gentle, so don't worry," Celestia said, startling me. She had somehow snuck in and now she draped herself over me from behind. Absolute terror time, my whole body shaking and feeling strange.
"Hello, Celly," Luna said warmly. "Would you like a drink?"
"I would love to have some," Celestia said and Luna poured her a glass. She sipped it. "I have missed seeing you, Marcus," she said. "You left so hastily last time."
FUCK ME.
SO MUCH.
"This was while you were gone, dear," she said to Luna. "Which is why you hadn't met him."
Luna nodded and sipped her drink. "There is many a pony who would kill to be where you are, Marcus. Know that you are greatly honored by such intimacy." She was grinning, clearly amused by my embarrassment. I doubt she could sense my full terror.
"I am greatly honored," I squeaked out.
I felt like I was about to shapeshift but my body didn't actually change. I could feel magic inside me, though. CELESTIA!
Luna studied my forehead. "I... Celly, there is something on his forehead." Her voice was gently chiding. ...
"It's an invisible unicorn horn, he being a unicorn human," Celestia said. "I hid it so no one would know he was one of my agents."
This is what I get for lying to children.
CELESTIA!!!
"So how long have you been in the business?" Luna asked. "Of adventuring. I had never heard of you before."
I was afraid to confess, but I want to know.
Trust is a leap in the dark.
Celestia is benevolent but her enemies tend to end up ground to dust. And she's very protective of Twilight.
Urrrrgh.
Rarity, I hope you don't have to make me a winding cloth.
Pretty as it would be, like you.
"I don't know," I confessed. "I think I've been reincarnating for some reason, over and over. Ivan thinks I may have been a candidate for the Polymath path." I took my sword and put it on the desk. "This is an artifact." I turned it to its original falchion form. "Marquetta had it and wants it back."
Celestia looked quite surprised, while Luna looked intrigued. Surely Celestia knew about this at least somewhat. In fact, Celestia seemed lost for words, which really surprised me.
"I think I was Dmitri Ilyanovich when I got the sword but when everything really blew up," I told her. "And I was probably Odo the Quick."
Celestia now recovered. "I will make discreet inquiries," she said.
"Also, did Asterius help you two to found Equestria?," I asked. "Ivan is a candidate under him. Or maybe someone is rooking him," I said, frowning. "He was given a rather difficult task."
"Quests for immortality are never easy," Luna said. "Or the world would be overrun with Immortals."
"And he has achieved it, by means acceptable to his patron," Celestia said. "For he watches over trade, among his duties."
"Is Asterius literally or symbolically your uncle?" I asked curiously.
"It is complicated," Luna said.
Celestia sipped her drink, then left it floating in the air. "He freed our ancestors during the fall of Blackmoor," she said. "And he guided us in our youth." She studied me now. "So you do not know why you keep being reborn?"
"I'm not even sure how many times," I told her. "It's all a blur with flashes of terror and screaming."
I would be screaming right now if I wasn't too frozen with fear they'll figure out... no, Celestia KNOWS but for some reason hasn't told Luna. But if I get her mad, she'll tell Luna and then I will DIE.
I am your bitch, Celestia. I get it now.
Luna looked very sad. "It is a terrible thing to be burdened with memories which only give you pain." She came over and nuzzled me gently. It was comforting despite my absolute terror.
"I'm not some kind of construct, right?" I said hesitantly.
They both studied me intently, making me VERY nervous.
"Let's go to my lab," Luna said.
"I must attend to work," Celestia said. "Luna will take good care of you."
Ahahah.
*************
Luna, Twilight, and Moondancer loomed over me as I was strapped to a table with all sorts of machines, wands, crystal balls, flasks, piping, clockworks, and other things all around me, flashing lights and making words and grinding on ever forever and ever. Spike lurked nearby, assisting them.
"Ectoplasmic phase inducer," Luna said and Twilight passed her a crystal rod, which she waved over me as I sweated and tried not to panic.
"Don't worry, only one in ten mutate into a hideous beast and have to be killed," Luna said to me. ...
Twilight stared, mouth open wide. Spike looked hopeful.
"Princess, you shouldn't tease him when he's always so scared," Moondancer said, a little chidingly.
"I'm sorry, Marcus, I was only teasing," Luna said. "It was very foalish of me." She and Moondancer both laughed softly at the pun while Twilight tried to calm her breathing.
"Rarity would be very unhappy if you turned Marcus into a rampaging monster," Twilight finally managed to say.
"Don't worry," Luna said. "Hmm, yes, you've definitely been reincarnated a lot."
I laughed nervously. "How?"
"Your sword has been tampered with by an immortal other than it's creator," she said. "Some sort of..." She frowned. "I'm not sure who did this or why, but if you live long enough between deaths, it will reincarnate you."
"Live long enough between deaths?"
"It takes time for it to regenerate its power. Several months. You've died recently, so you'd best avoid dying." ...
"Wait... I did?" I said in surprise.
"Yes," Luna said. She blinked. "You didn't notice?"
When the hell did I die?
"Do you have a day?" I asked weakly.
"I don't have a precise day," she said.
Going to have to talk to Ivan.
"I will be careful," I said, while Moondancer looked intrigued and I looked worried.
"Don't worry, we won't let you die again," Twilight said.
"Celestia and I will make inquiries. Something strange is going on," Luna said. "You should go rest before dinner. Moondancer, show him to where he is staying. Twilight, I have business to take care of, but I am looking forward to seeing you at dinner." She smiled shyly.
Twilight said, "I am very honored you let me assist you." She pony-bowed. "Moondancer, it's good to see you again."
"You've changed," Moondancer said flatly and Twilight cringed a little. "For the better." She smiled now.
"Thank you, Moondancer," Twilight said to her. "I had a lot to learn about Friendship." She turned to Luna. "Do you think Fluttershy could charge up his sword?" Twilight asked thoughtfully.
"An interesting idea. I will think on that," Luna said. "Marcus, it is nice to meet you. Don't worry, you are safe here."
Until Celestia tells you everything and I die.
We all bowed and headed out. "Where am I staying?" I asked.
"With Rarity and Sweetie, I think," Moondancer said as she walked along. "You are a nervous stallion," she said to me.
"Well, you can see why," I said.
She paused and looked sad. "Yes, I can."
"Don't worry, we won't let you die more," Twilight said to me.
I'm as worried about you all dying as me dying myself.
Stupid bonding instincts.
We heard odd noises and squealing as we reached Rarity's room. "My goodness," I said.
"Sounds like she's having a tumble in the hay with someone," Moondancer said, looking surprised.
Surely not.
Twilight's eyes got wide and she opened the door. "Rarity, what are you..."
The kids were rampaging and jumping on the bed and the chair and climbing on the furniture and Rarity and Ditzy were desperately trying to get them in check.
Moondancer said, "Oh."
Twilight looked relieved and so was I. The last thing in this universe I want is to walk in on pony-pony love-love, not that Rarity is the type to just randomly sleep with the help. "Children, stop rampaging!"
"I'm flying like Mom!" Dinky shouted as she bounced.
"Unicorns don't fly!" Ditzy said, trying to grab her and failing; Apple Bloom now landed on her, knocking her down on the bed. "Where did you come from?"
I put a little magic in my voice. "STOP!" I shouted. Teacher instincts now rose up inside me.
They all froze, and now Scootaloo landed, rolled over and trailed her legs in the air like a fainting goat.
"Students, fall in line," I said sternly.
They all lined up on the edge of the bed.
"In order, by name."
They shuffled quickly. Twilight, Rarity, and Moondancer stared at me.
"Scootaloo, why did you encourage everyone to jump on the bed?" I said.
She tried to feign death again.
"Scootaloo, that may get you out of chores by panicking your parents, but it won't work on me. Why?"
"I was bored," she mumbled. "And I want to fly like Rainbow Dash but my stupid body won't let me." She looked very frustrated.
"I hear you're very good on your scooter," I told her.
"I'm AWESOME," she said.
"You should show me later," I told her. "I've never ridden on a scooter before."
"You'll get a GREAT show," she said confidently.
"I'm sure I will," I said. "But right now, you all need to rest before dinner so you don't embarrass your family and friends by falling over and landing your face in your food, like I did one time in Alphatia."
I told them the whole embarrassing story; it was a victory party thrown by someone who hired us to recover some bits of undead he needed for a magic item. I was so drained of energy I fell asleep in the middle and ended up with fish stew on my face.
They were all laughing by the end of it. Rarity had straightened out and made the bed while I kept the kids busy; Ditzy was listening to the story, Twilight whispering to Rarity and Moondancer had bid us farewell and taken off. And Spike, he was listening and laughing too.
"Okay, kids, it's naptime," I said. "Before dinner."
"I'm too old for a nap! I can pick things up with my tail!" Apple Bloom said.
Don't make me use a sleep spell on you, kids. "I'm going to nap too," I told them. "Even big people need a nap sometimes."
Pretty soon, I had them all lying down on the bed with myself in the middle. "Wake us up in time to freshen up for dinner," I told Rarity.
She nodded and soon blessed sleep engulfed us all.
***************
Dinner was excellent; Canterlot entertains a lot of ambassadors and merchants from human countries, so it's a great place to get human styles of food; the food today was based on the Principality of Blackhill's food. In Blackhill, they like food which has a strong smell. So all the various human guests had mutton, anchovies, carrots, and peppers, in a garlic-blue cheese sauce on rice. The ponies had the same dish without the mutton and anchovies.
The smell could knock you out but it was very tasty. The Belcadizian guests looked a little wobbly, but the Aalbaneese quite enjoyed it. I saw Dona Carlotta but made myself not stare. That chapter of my life is over.
Sweetie kept her table manners up, with only a few reminders from Rarity and myself. Pinkie, on the other hand, was busy sucking down food like it might escape and Apple Bloom and Scootaloo were both in that category. Despite Rarity giving them the gaze of disapproval. I kept my mouth shut; they weren't under my care. Twist had good manners and Dinky was strongly supervised by her mother.
The kids and some of the adults at our table (we sat with both Princesses and Moondancer) got a lot of stares from other ponies present; the Glantrian ponies all had very formal manners.
"So you didn't send us a dream?" Sweetie Belle said to Princess Luna, confused.
"No, after the ceremony, I'm going to talk to all of you about that," Princess Luna said. "Someone tricked you."
"But they needed us to save them," Apple Bloom said, confused.
"We have to figure it out," Princess Luna said kindly. "You were very brave, but you should have told your parents."
"We thought you told us not to," Scootaloo said, frowning.
I hope they can figure this out; kids shouldn't be used as pawns.
"You should only do what *I* tell you to do in dreams," Pinkie said cheerfully.
Ahahaha.
"I should show you my magic trick," Sweetie Belle suddenly said.
"Finish your dinner," Rarity said.
"You can show her later when you meet with her in private," I told Sweetie.
"It's AMAZING," Twist said, clearly impressed by it.
Princess Celestia looked at me with an odd smile. I felt my forehead tingle. Invisible horn indeed. "Have you ever had any children, Marcus?" she asked, then took a sip of her tea.
Her phoenix now flew down and landed on her head, then looked over at me suspiciously. Given I wasn't wearing my hat (not socially acceptable at dinner, sadly), I don't know why.
The kids stared, wide-eyed, at the phoenix. "So pretty," Sweetie said softly.
Twilight, on the other hand, laughed nervously for some reason.
Fluttershy nervously waved at the phoenix which now flew over to perch on her head. She smiled more brightly now, clearly happy with her new hat.
Now that's cheating.
"I have not had any children, but I have been a child," I said. Then I felt ignorant for having said that.
"Well, everyone starts as a child," Twist said hesitantly.
"I am not a child," Apple Bloom insisted.
"You seem good with children, though, like a father or a teacher would be," Celestia said.
DAMMIT CELESTIA!!!!
I hid my terror and the urge to RUN RUN RUN. "Children are much easier to deal with than salamanders," I said.
"That's what I thought," Fluttershy said ruefully. ...
"I'd like to hope I'd be a good father," I told her. "But you can only find out by doing it. You've had children, right?"
"Many children," Celestia said. "Is that a proposition?"
...............................
Rarity stared, mouth wide, and Twilight... tiny tendrils of steam came out of her ears. She tried to speak but only incoherent noises happened. Fluttershy blinked, Applejack began laughing, Ivan laughed and laughed and laughed, and Pinkie giggled.
The kids all stared at me and Sweetie Belle looked oddly nervous.
Celestia began laughing and Luna said, "Don't tease people like that, Celly," though she was laughing herself.
"You'd make a fine stallion, I'm sure," Celestia said, smiling that tiny 'gotcha' smile.
"Ivan certainly did," Applejack said.
Everyone looked at her and now she looked a little flustered. Ivan quickly stuffed his face and I grinned a little.
"Why don't you tell us about it?" Celestia said, then ate some of her dinner.
"Sister, you can't just tease everyone," Luna said.
"I'll tell you about how *I* turned into a human and got to touch EVERYTHING." Pinkie said, then began a long rambling discourse on her brief sojourn on our side of the fence. Lyra, I noticed, listened with great interest.
I hoped other ponies could not hear the conversation at this table. Or anyone else. Or...
Scootaloo looked at me. "Are there humans who fly?"
"Yes," I told her. "In Alphatia." I gave her a little discourse on Floating Ar while Pinkie rambled on and everyone ate. "And my friend Helga can fly now." She's a better wizard than me, I must admit to my embarrassment. "She's married to another flying wizard in Glantri. They have a daughter, but I don't think she can fly yet. She has a unicorn pony best friend named Sugar Sparkle."
"Does she have a cutie mark?" Scootaloo asked, looking oddly thoughtful.
"None of the three of us have one," I said. "I'm pretty sure only ponies get cutie marks."
Scootaloo now looked very thoughtful which really was the scariest thing I'd seen all day and I'd been tied to a table with people joking about me mutating into a hideous monster.
People who will kill me if they find out who I actually am.
That being said, I was feeling... mellow by the Marcus scale, which would probably be a fair amount of fear by the measure of people with less panic-inducing lives.
Dinner was winding down; dessert was cinnamon rolls and a kind of fruit-jam pastry apparently popular in Aalban. I rather liked it. Dinky tried to eat one of each at once and had to be saved from choking; it didn't help that her mother had done the same thing and they were flailing in unison. ...
"Not as good as a muffin but pretty good," Ditzy said afterwards.
I heard Rarity whispering something about examples to Ditzy, who looked embarrassed.
"Is there anything a pony can do to get a cutie mark around here?" Apple Bloom asked Celestia.
"Well, I would like each of you to help with the Moon Raising Ceremony," Luna said kindly to them. "Dinky, I will need you to make sure the sky is clear. Scootaloo, you will do the ceremonial dance with Moondancer. She will show you what to do. Sweetie Belle, I will want you to sing with me." Sweetie gasped at that. "Twist, you will recite the sacred verses. And Apple Bloom, I will need you to pass me the sacred mirror at the right time."
"Of course!" Apple Bloom said proudly. "I can pick things up better now!" she said excitedly. "I bet I could juggle now!"
Okay, Luna, I salute you. You'll have them eating out of your... if you had hands, they would eat out of your hands after this.
"Do you need us to do anything?" Twilight asked hopefully.
"You are our honored guests. You need merely watch. It wouldn't hurt to keep an eye out for portents, though," Luna said smoothly.
If I am going to be Celestia and Luna's little bitch, at least I will get to study with two masters of maneuvering people around the board of life.
*****************
We got to be in a viewing stand; it was a bit tricky for Ivan and I because it was basically designed for ponies to sit sphinx-style. I scrunched up between Rarity and Twilight, with Ivan between Dash and Applejack. Then I realized I could sit cross-legged, with a hand on Rarity's back for balance. She looked like she was contemplating something, then decided not to, whatever it was, and just adjusted her hat, which was currently feigning being a tiara; she was in her fancy red dress and I wore my red suit. Different shades, though.
Lyra had been drafted up to play with the orchestra; she and Octavia were carefully NOT looking at each other, but you could feel the tension. Bon-Bon was watching them intently.
Applejack looked a little nervous, probably because Apple Bloom was waving the sacred mirror (platinum with a silver frame that resembled lunar surface) around like it was a toy. Twist looked very serious at the podium and Dinky was running around behind everything set up for the show, busy making her horn glow. Wisps of cloud were vanishing as she worked, clearing the sky.
I assume normally weather ponies would have cleared it by now, but Luna had them relent so as to give Dinky a job. She was good at it, though, and her mother looked VERY proud.
Dash was sitting by Soarin' (as well as Ivan), and they now intertwined two of their forelegs, which I assume is the pony equivalent of holding hands. I smiled and pointed it out to Rarity, who smiled at them as well.
Scootaloo now came out with her cape on; they all had their capes on, in fact, though the hoods were down. They WANTED to be seen. Moondancer had put on a cape herself, with the night sky and the moon and stars on it.
Twilight grumbled about stars and Spike laughed at her softly, making her embarrassed.
"Have you ever seen this?" I asked Rarity.
I've seen it, but not with Luna.
"I have not seen it with Luna," Twilight said. "I have seen it with Celestia."
"Never, darling," Rarity said. "Have you?"
"I've never seen it," I lied. Dammit, I hate having to lie to her. And Twilight. And everyone.
"Since time immemorial," Twist said solemnly, "Ponies have dwelt here atop, on the sides of, and below the great plateau we call home. But when first we came here, we were slaves to the Orcs."
And now the song began, a song of mourning for the time of the suffering of ponies at the hands of the Orcs. Sweetie Belle looked to be on the verge of crying as she sang and her voice had a power I did not expect. Soon, everyone was crying or at least sorrowful. I could see Dash struggling not to cry; Soarin' was the same way and I could feel Rarity vibrate and tears ran down her face.
There was a very faint cloppety-clop of hooves and a pony sat down at the far end of the viewing stand, getting in among the foreign guests. But I had seen him. Black coat and a silver mane with the full moon on his flank. Full Moon. What was HE doing here?
Ivan didn't notice, too busy trying to avoid crying. He looked kind of silly, really but I was too busy crying to care.
"And then they came from the north, as had we, our liberators, Celestia and Luna, who led us to freedom, aided by the Elements of Harmony," Twist said.
Lights shone around Luna and Celestia and Moondancer and Scootaloo, who now somehow was black and blue in color, danced together, and I realized they were representing Celestia and Luna. Scootaloo looked utterly ecstatic as she danced and Moondancer smiled brightly.
I glanced at Full Moon, who apparently didn't care about not being mentioned. Was it really him or just a coincidence?
Sweetie sang a rousing marching tune now, one suitable for leading ponies to war, and the dance matched them and I could see the ponies rouse from sorrow to strength around me.
"They had many adventures," Twist said, "But when all was done, they had grown into their power and it was time for ponies to rise up. And the signal was prepared. The Orcs lived in the dark, thrived in it. So they would change that. They would bring LIGHT."
And now Apple Bloom held up the sacred mirror and it began to shine. Luna mounted the platform in the middle of this, as Scootaloo and Moondancer continued to dance; lights now twined around the two of them and Sweetie continued to sing powerfully. She sang of the night, the moon and the stars, its comforting embrace and its joys. Sweetie was glowing as well and lights danced around Apple Bloom and the mirror, the stars forming and converging on the three youngsters.
I could see Dona Carlotta and her boyfriend holding hands. I told myself not to look; they both looked so happy, though, and her father was right by them, watching with rapt attention. Silver Fork sat by them as well, looking fascinated, and I suddenly wondered if he was related to the Silver I met or the Ponyville Silvers.
"The day came and the signal was the rising of the twin lights," Twist said excitedly. Dinky stood with her now, reading with her, their voices blending together. "The sun and the MOON."
And now Apple Bloom stepped onto the platform and threw the mirror into the air and it began to shine brighter and brighter and Luna rose into the air with it, and the horizon glowed and then the moon rose as the dancers danced and Sweetie sang and the orchestra played and now everyone broke into song, singing up the moon together as Luna rose and the mirror overlapped the moon and shone brightly, then vanished.
Even the guests were singing now; you could hardly not sing, and I heard Full Moon's baritone most powerfully of all.
Moondancer leaped skyward, holding Scootaloo, spinning together, leaving a trail of sparkling dust and they 'flew' over Luna as she descended. Luna blew and the dust flew onto everyone, settling on us and sparkling; you could feel the power coming from the moon, almost see its light shining across Equestria, bringing Luna's blessing. I stared; I'd never seen this before after an Equestrian moonrise. It was different. I could feel something. Something good.
No one else seemed to be having any kind of reaction to this except Ivan, who was staring wide-eyed at the moon. It wasn't a human thing; the other humans here were oblivious. Had Full Moon / Asterius done something?
But the fillies, they were staring at the moon too. They felt it. And Luna and Celestia were smiling at each other and the moon.
And Full Moon, he knew. And... Twilight. She could tell something, though it pleased her.
The other Elements, though, seemed oblivious. If cheerful.
Scootaloo, Twist, Apple Bloom, Sweetie, and Dinky glowed softly with moonlight, as did Moondancer and Luna, as the ceremony finished and everyone scattered. Sweetie ran over to us. "Look!" she said, twirling around.
"You were magnificent," Rarity said, rising and nuzzling her. "I am VERY proud of you."
I gave her a hug when they finished. "I won't be surprised if you get a cutie mark for singing."
She checked, but no, not yet, though if she's that good without a cutie mark... "You should consider bardic training," I said. "Lyra can tell you about it. Scootaloo too."
Scootaloo... I didn't think that even a pony could be that happy. She was bouncing up and down in front of Rainbow Dash, who was smiling at her brightly.
That's when I saw a pony I recognized from descriptions. Duke Blueblood. I felt the immediate urge to wipe the smirk off his stupid looking face. He was talking cheerfully with some Aalbanese fellow; they were enjoying their conversation but I wanted to make him cry for what he did to Rarity.
Bastard.
I am not the violent type, though, and pony society doesn't favor violence. But if I can get in a cheap shot or ten on him, I will.
He must have felt my hate-gaze, as he turned and looked at me and his eyes widened and then he grimaced and turned back.
Fuck you too, Blueblood.
I heard Rarity make a noise.
"That's him, right?" I said softly.
She sighed. "Yes, it's him. Just ignore him, Marcus darling. He's not worth our time."
Amen to that.
I pointed out Full Moon to Rarity; her eyes widened. "What is he doing here?"
"Hopefully just here to see Ivan," I told her.
When he went over to Ivan and Ivan went off with him, that was confirmed.
The two of them slipped out, followed by Luna; Celestia rounded up the rest of us and took us to a large hall which had been turned into a party zone. A private party, just our mob and Celestia, though I expected Luna, Full Moon, and Ivan would join us soon.
Celestia came around and congratulated everyone and we all wandered around, talking, eating, and relaxing. And trying to run herd on the CMC. Who were hyper as all get out and Luna, who was supposed to talk to them, was absent.
I ended up organizing a card game with Applejack, Apple Bloom, Twist, Sweetie, and Pinkie. (Dinky wanted to play but her mother said no.) I studied my hand. Five of Flames, Six of Flames, Eight of Flames, Eight of Stones, Ten of Winds. I felt ambitious, so after the first round of bidding, I threw in the Eight of Stones and the Ten of Winds. Applejack threw in two cards, Apple Bloom four, Twist three, Sweetie four, and Pinkie...
Pinkie turned her cards upside down, then sideways, then lectured them sternly and threw all but one in.
Then she dealt out new cards to everyone. I now had the Five of Flames, the Six of Flames, the Eight of Flames, the Two of Flames, and the Jack of Flames. Not bad, but not awesome either.
Applejack studied her cards, then bid three silver bits. We were playing with silver and copper because, well, half the players were kids. I suspect she underbid to be careful. Probably has three of a kind again.
Apple Bloom studied her cards, manipulating them with her tail as her sister did. "Hmmm. I bid four bits."
"Raise four or you bid one over your sister?" I asked.
"Oh, umm... Actually, I raise by six... four. Four silver bits," Apple Bloom said, pushing her money out with a hoof.
"I...," Twist hesitated. She looked at Apple Bloom. "Fold."
Sweetie looked at me, her cards, Apple Bloom, Pinkie, her cards, me, her cards, Applejack, Rarity, Celestia, her cards, her hooves, her stack of coins, and then her cards. She took a drink of apple juice, then said, "I... I raise by three." She pushed her coins out.
Should have folded, I thought. I suspect she has garbage.
"I raise twenty," Pinkie said confidently.
The problem with playing poker with Pinkie is that she may, in fact, have anything whatsoever. I do not at all understand how she thinks.
IF she thinks.
I studied my cards. Who the hell knows what Pinkie has? But I feel confident. "I see Pinkie."
Applejack grimaced. "Fold."
She'll regret that.
"I see but don't raise," Apple Bloom said.
"FOLD," Twist said urgently.
Sweetie studied everything on earth, including her cards eight times. She looked at Pinkie. Finally, she flipped a coin. Celestia side up. "I see the bet," she said.
"Okay, betting's over, then," Pinkie said. "Show your STUFF."
I laid down my Jack high Flush.
Applejack cursed, though having folded, she didn't have to show her cards. Then she put a hoof to her mouth. "Sorry, kids."
"Damn! Shit!" Apple Bloom said, giggling. "I'm a big GLOWING pony now!"
"Don't go cursing 'cause I slipped up," Applejack said, embarrassed.
Apple Bloom sighed, laying down her cards. Three of Flames, Three of Winds, Three of Stones, Jack of Shadows, Ace of Shadows. "I had a three of a kind, but you beat me, Marcus. Dammit!"
"Stop cursing," Applejack said urgently.
"Since big ponies swear," Apple Bloom began.
"We shouldn't swear either, right, Marcus?"
"I keep my language as clean as the fallen snow, as perfect as Celestia's shining coat," I said.
As Sweetie laid down her full house, I stared, wondering why exactly she'd been so worried. "I lose, right?"
"You beat both of us," I said, and then Celestia settled down over me, catching me by surprise.
"Oh wait, this isn't a flush!" Pinkie said, then threw her cards down. Four Shadows... and one Stone. "Here you go, Sweetie."
"I WON!" Sweetie said excitedly.
Having won the three previous hands, I shouldn't mope.
Also, Celestia.
"You are such a flirt, Marcus," she said cheerfully to me. "Of course, *I* know you say that to all the girls."
DAMMIT CELESTIA.
"I was just being metaphorical, not flirting," I said quickly to Celestia. The last thing I need is everyone thinking Celestia and I are having an affair or something.
"So my theoretical, allegorical coat is pure, but not the real thing?" she said sadly.
"Don't make the Princess sad," Apple Bloom said sternly to me.
Sweetie was panicking for some reason, as if her oxygen had been cut off. Pinkie began shaking her. "Breathe! Breathe! Push! Push!"
Push?
"You have a beautiful, pure white shining coat, but I am not saying that in some sort of effort of seduction!" I said to her frantically.
"Well, how am I supposed to tell?" she said to me cheerfully but pointedly.
I don't get it. It's not like I've been going around seducing pony women. Or men. Or whatever.
"I'm a human," I mumbled.
"Which doesn't matter to me any more than it did to Father and Mother," she said cheerfully.
I was about to ask something, then realized fillies present. In Elvish, I said to her, "Fillies are present and probably should not be encouraged to get ideas in their head which would lead to trouble. Or their parents wanting to kill us." I hope I got it right, I haven't spoken Elvish seriously since I fled Belcadiz.
" 'Us'," she said cheerfully in Elvish. "It has such a lovely ring to it."
DAMMIT CELESTIA.
"Sweetie, are you okay?" I said to Sweetie.
"Princess, people might get the wrong idea!" Sweetie said frantically.
"We're just friends," Celestia said. "This is perfectly normal between friends, right?" She looked at me with one eye.
CELESTIA, DAMMIT!
What is she getting at? I haven't been... Okay, Rarity and I do play the game of ladies and gentlemen, but I don't think she's serious about it. She's a pony, I'm a human and we're just good friends. Now if she was human...
Though with shapeshifting magic...
Even with that, I certainly can't date someone when I'm hiding things from them. Which I wish I didn't have to but once it comes out, I die.
Dammit.
It would help if Applejack looked less amused.
And if I wasn't worrying about Ivan.
I am being drawn into a trap and I don't even know HOW. Or what it is.
My body solved this with its usual solution: abject panic. However, with Celestia on me, I could not actually run, I just made incoherent noises as my brain spun in place.
I tried to think coherently but the feeling TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP was inescapable. TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP.
Want to run so much.
Can't run.
Can't BREATHE.
"Princess, you're embarrassin' him," Applejack said hesitantly. "Marcus, Princess Celestia is just very affectionate. She don't mean nothin' by it and she won't banish you to the moon or nothin' if you say no."
BREATHE.
Apple Bloom for some reason, decided the solution was to tickle my nose with her tail. This caused me to sneeze, which oddly restored breathing.
I mumbled something incoherent about something. Who knows, my brain was trying to right itself.
"I'm fine," I said in a way clearly not fine. "I expect many in your court would get the wrong idea, though," I said. "Or others."
Applejack's eyes flared slightly. "Well, that's true."
Sweetie made incoherent panicked noises, while Apple Bloom said, "What's got you all shook up, Sweetie?"
No one else seemed to be paying us any attention. "Do you know when Ivan is going to be back?"
"Soon," Celestia said. "I should probably be with them, but I couldn't leave you all on your own. And we need to discuss serious business, anyway."
Sweetie ran and stuck her head in the punch bowl for some reason. ...
"Sweetie!" I said, rising and running over. "Use a glass. Everyone has to share that."
"I'm sorry," she said in a panic.
I began wiping her head. "Also, if you do, don't stick your head in completely."
"Okay," she mumbled.
"Sweetie, what's wrong?" Twist said, clearly worried.
"I'm okay," Sweetie said weakly. "I just got thirsty."
Okay, I am just a teacher, not a parent, but even I know something's going on.
Rarity now came over. "Sweetie," she said, sounding frustrated. "Don't do that."
"I won't do it again," Sweetie said. "I wasn't thinking." She sounded a little evasive. "I'm sorry."
Was she trying to get me out of something that embarrassed me? I think so. You are very kind, Sweetie. I'll get you something nice later in thanks. "It's okay," I told her. "It's late and you should probably be in bed."
"I have to talk to Luna!" she said urgently.
I am starting to worry about that.
"Why don't you sit with me and we'll play some hands together?" I told her. "And you should apologize to Rarity too."
"No pooling your winnings!" Apple Bloom protested.
"I'm sorry, big sister," Sweetie said to Rarity, who nuzzled her.
"It's okay, you're tired," Rarity said, then poured her a glass of the punch. "Celestia, if Luna doesn't return soon, we're going to need to put the fillies to bed."
"I'm fine!" Dinky said, then yawned.
"I can put them to bed," Ditzy said.
"We'll help unless you need us, Celestia," Lyra said.
"You should stay," Celestia said, which made them both nervous. "Luna can talk to them in the morning. Ditzy Doo, if you would put them all to bed, I would be grateful." She whistled up two servants to assist and the three of them now tried to hustle the children.
Good luck there.
Hustling children is hard to do.
**************
Once they were gone, we went over everything that happened on the trip with Celestia. I continued to fret.
"She will likely strike at us," Twilight concluded. "Trying to get revenge and to get Marcus' sword. She can't find it, however, unless it's in falchion form, we think."
"Which means probably the best way to draw her out is for me to carry it around in falchion form," I said, wincing at the thought of painting 'EAT ME' on myself.
"We can't ask you to be bait," Twilight said, frowning.
"Unless we can find her lair and take this to her, finding a place we can turn into our own trap and luring her and the Elements of Power into it is probably the best plan," I said. "Much as I would rather not be bait. But she wants me and my sword." I remembered her words and I shivered. 'Fine, but this is not the end. Tell Celestia, she will regret this. And you, 'Samus Marcus', you will die your final death soon and I will have my sword BACK. There is no one who can protect you from me, Marcus. Your luck cannot protect you forever. I know you now and I will find you. Enjoy your final days, for soon, they will END!'
She's probably an immortal and she wants me dead and I want to just scream and run until I fall off the plateau. Even knowing I won't come back this time.
I have a patron, but she enjoys fucking with my mind and she knows everything and is probably going to keep pushing until I go stark raving mad and DIE. And I have to put myself in danger, anyway.
DAMMIT. I had mostly managed to shove aside what she said, but now... I wanted to scream.
"Marcus, you don't have to do this," Twilight said urgently.
"She told me she is going to see me dead," I told Twilight. "I could..." I shivered. "She will come for me anyway, so better I be bait with a chance to stop her than be bait anyway."
"I won't let her have you," Dash said hotly. That's how she is. She'd follow a friend into the five hells of the five fiends.
"Thanks, Dash," I said.
"You will not stand alone," Rarity said firmly. She sat by me, sphinx-style, but she now patted my leg. "We will protect you."
"Thank you," I told her.
"You can do it," Applejack said firmly to me.
Do what?
Not die horribly, I hope.
"I have an idea," Celestia said. "It is, however, dependent on us finding where she is lairing."
"Those lockpicks Ivan just got would be a huge benefit to a break-in," I said.
"I am thinking we could exploit your resemblance to her servants by dressing some of you up as your evil twins to infiltrate her base," Celestia said. ...
"Ooooh, sounds fun," Pinkie said. "I like costumes."
"It would, of course, require Marcus and Twilight to pretend to be in love and Rarity and Spike to do the same," Celestia said. "Which might be too much to ask."
DAMN YOU CELESTIA!!!!!!
"I'll do it! I can fake being Rarity's boyfriend totally," Spike said excitedly.
Spitfire looked at me and I contemplated self-immolation.
"I...ummm..." Twilight laughed nervously. "I'm not a very good actor... and I wouldn't want to... umm... ahahaha." She was completely ungluing.
Rarity said, "An interesting idea, but I don't know if we could pass muster with someone who knew them well." Her voice was smooth and calm, while my insides churned like the raging sea.
I envied her that.
"Well, we can think about it. We'd have to find their base, anyway," Pinkie said. "Is she really a dragon or an alicorn or what?"
"We have to figure that out," Celestia said. "I expect there is more to her anger with me than just all of you, though she may be that petty." She looked thoughtful. "If she is the Moon Dragon, we have had some past problems with her, though I think the office has actually changed holders since then."
"Office?" Applejack asked.
"Draconic ascension to Immortality is different from that of the other sentient races; there are certain 'offices' which convey Immortal status on the holder. The Moon Dragon watches over the Colored Dragons, who tend to be chaotic in nature. Luna and I had trouble with the previous holder of the office many, many years ago," Celestia said, frowning. "But several hundred years ago, it changed hands. I had understood that the new one was still getting used to her power and spent much of her time out in the planes. But if she is Marquetta, then she must have turned her attention finally to the Prime," Celestia said, frowning. The Prime is the plane of existence which is for mortals only; Immortals are forbidden to enter except in mortal form or when allowed by the Council of Intrusion. It is the plane we dwell on.
This doesn't stop them meddling, mind you.
"She has," Full Moon said. "I don't know exactly when, but she is still young and naive, powerful enough to take her office but not yet wise enough to know either how to serve it responsibly or to abuse it sensibly." He shook his head, then came over to Celestia and they nuzzled each other gently. "It is very good to see you, niece."
Lyra and Bon-Bon made noises; I'd forgotten they were here and I still don't know why Celestia summoned them.
"It is wonderful to see you, Uncle. Your follower was a great help to my dear friends, the Elements of Harmony and their friends," Celestia said warmly. There was an oddly shy look to her which I was stunned to see. "You saw the moon raising, right?"
"Yes," he said. "It was beautiful and working well now, I see. Good luck on that."
"Without my sister, I was much less than I could be," Celestia said simply. "And I owe it all to my dear friends and my dear student, Twilight."
The Elements all turned a little red and Twilight made a happy noise like a filly.
Wait, where's Ivan and Luna?
Luna answered this by surprise-nuzzling me. I was caught off-guard, but then relaxed; she was very gentle and I could tell... had she been crying? And I still didn't see Ivan, which worried me. "We must talk," she said softly.
"Where is Ivan?"
"In a practice room," she said. "He'll be back soon."
In a practice room?
"Luna, come over," Celestia said and she did and the three of them cuddled for a short time.
"I must go again," Full Moon said. "I will send you whatever I may find out."
"Thank you, uncle," Celestia said warmly. She glanced around. "Where is Ivan?"
"He went to a practice room to get a little exercise," Full Moon said.
At this hour?
I could tell the ponies knew something odd was up, but what?
"I could use some exercise," Dash said, rising and running off.
I should go check on him but I can't just run out of this meeting. Dammit.
Lyra finally said, "Your highness, umm... Why are we here? Bon-Bon and I?"
Celestia sighed. "Certain agents of Minrothad have been looking into you two. I do not know why but I prefer you to be here, and safe under my protection, then where you might fall into danger unexpected."
Lyra stared, eyes wide. "What?"
She looked at all of us. "I know agents of Minrothad showed up looking for Erik of Vestland at White Plume Mountain. This was not that group, I think, but do any of you know of any reason why Minrothad might have taken an interest in Lyra and Bon-Bon?"
Not because of me, I hope. I had a ton of students at Celestia's school. "Is it just them?" I asked.
"Apparently," Celestia said.
Bon-Bon certainly has no connection to me.
"But I'm just a candymaker," Bon-Bon said weakly.
"I want it to appear you just tagged along for fun," Celestia said. "I'm sure they won't try anything in the palace, but I do not wish them to know I know."
"I honestly can't imagine why they would care about me," Lyra said, baffled.
"Your harp isn't made in Minrothad, right?" I asked.
"It's fine Heldaan craftsmanship," she said. The Heldaan Freeholds are WAY in the back of beyond, north of the Northern Reaches, but south of Norwold. A crazy order of cleric-knights who serve Vanya (Immortal of War) rule it.
"While you are here, I'd be glad if you could play with our royal orchestra," Celestia continued.
Lyra twitched. "But... you already have a harpist."
"He is eager to work with you," Celestia said, smiling.
You poor bastard.
"Bon-Bon, you can stick with Twist and I and we'll make BEAUTIFUL candy together," Pinkie said to Bon-Bon.
"Thank you," Bon-Bon said. "Twist has been studying with me." She sounded proud. "She will be a great candy-maker one day."
"Oooh, this is a chance for one of my best candy ideas ever. We'll need Rainbow Dash to help, though," Pinkie said.
"She makes candy?" Bon-Bon said in surprise.
"We will need her if we're going to candify a RAINBOW," Pinkie said. "Ever since I tasted a rainbow, I wanted to make a candy out of rainbows." ...
"Interesting," Bon-Bon said.
We began discussing ideas for how to trap the Elements of Power and/or Marquetta/Marjorie. Ivan and Dash returned, very sweaty; Ivan looked fairly relaxed now.
It eventually got late enough that everyone was ready for bed. Luna, however, took me with her, back to her office. "If Celly sneaks into your bedroom tonight, just punch her lightly on the nose," Luna told me. ...
She laughed softly. "I'm joking. She won't take it that far, I think."
I sank down into the nice padded chair, yawning. "What happened?"
"Ivan tagged along with us, hidden, while we did some investigations," Luna said, then frowned. "She had forgotten. I knew Bastet was flighty, but..."
"Go on?" I said, frowning. Bastet was a Nithian immortal, but of late, she's been more concerned with the rakasta (cat-people). "Was I a Rakasta or something?"
"I am not sure. Bastet was not very cooperative. Also..." She grimaced. "Bastet saw you as an experiment and I get the impression, she engaged in... tampering." Luna frowned deeply. "She was rather uncooperative, but after you got killed when you were Dimitri, she lost interest in you. But her experimenting has something to do with the chaos which tends to surround you and you returning from the grave. Bastet has an interest in chaos, very unusual for a Matter Immortal," Luna continued, frowning more.
"Is this office secure?" I asked.
She blinked and nodded.
"Was she trying to create an uncorrupted Entropy immortal?" I asked softly.
Her eyes widened.
"Twilight has a gentle heart and a big mouth and trusts very easily," I told her. "That is not to say I am flawless. Too much trust is a better flaw than being easily scared shitless." I sighed and slumped in the chair. "So I was a cat's plaything."
"Tell me what you remember of the owlbear incident."
I told her what little I remember.
"I couldn't get the full story yet. Uncle is going to look into it," Luna said, frowning. "That sounds to me like you died protecting her."
"Yes," I said softly, staring at the floor.
"Good for you," Luna said. "If that counted as failing for Bastet, then she is a fool," Luna said hotly. She paused and took a sip of liquid moonlight from a half-empty glass which had been on her desk when we arrived. "I'm sorry, would you like some?"
"Just a little," I said and she poured it for me. "I don't remember her at all," I confessed. "So much of it is a blur."
"Typically, all memories are removed and only regained when you finish," Luna said. "But you never actually 'finished'. I believe Bastet tampered with the sword so it would do the work of reincarnating you and she could claim no connection to her experiment if she had to. Whatever exactly it was. You may well be right."
I licked my lips. "You know what we saw, right?" I said to her desk, nervous about looking right at her.
"That I was Nightmare Moon," she said.
"Yes," I told her. "But Twilight and her friends brought you back."
"I was young and foolish and proud," Luna said. "I made many mistakes and I will be atoning for a very long time. You have things you regret, don't you?" She clearly knew I did. I'm not sure if that means she knows about me being Erik, as I got the impression she'd kill me for that.
"Yes," I told her. "I do." Like running away from Twilight. Blowing everything in a moment of panic. I didn't even say goodbye. She's going to hate me for that when she finds out the truth.
"The two important things are to apologize and atone for what you've done," Luna said. "I will be doing that for a long time."
I nodded. "I tend to panic before I can even think of that," I confessed.
"I noticed," she said and I winced. "But with time, you will get over that. Now that you have less reason to fear."
"Beyond an Immortal determined to kill me," I told the floor.
She sipped her drink and I sipped mine. "She will not have you," Luna said. "May I mark you? I wish to place you under my protection as well."
"Yes," I said softly. I felt... a certain kindredness of spirit. Her passion on my behalf... it touched me.
NOT LIKE THAT.
She smiled and came over and kissed my forehead. I felt a tingle, then she sighed. "I can remove that, you know. The horn. Celly should have asked."
"She was covering my stupid flapping of my mouth and I need a reminder to *shut up* sometimes," I told her. "And she came to my aid when I was lost." For all that she wants me to repay her by going insane with fear.
"In the long term, we will have to clean up your messes, you know," she said to me. "In the short term, though, we will deal with Marjorie before we worry about any of that."
I rose and bowed to her, going to one knee. "As milady commands."
"And you are not allowed to set Duke Blueblood on fire," she said.
Damn.
"As milady commands."
"He considers her to have sinned against him, you know," she said, then sighed. "I know it was necessary but to see his line come to this..." She shook her head. "I knew his distant ancestor who founded the line. *He* was a man," Luna said.
"I know, I saw him," I told her. "What you did was very risky."
"I was young, foolish, invincible," she said to me. "I burned to avenge my people and buy their freedom. And I am glad I did. But now I am older and wiser and more cautious, like you. We have both passed through fire. A lot of fire." She sighed and finished her glass. "I know fear now," she said, and sighed. "As do you. I will do my best to guide and protect you," Luna said to me.
"You trust me much to tell me all this," I said softly.
"Trust is a leap in the dark," she said. "And I am the queen of the dark. But I have stars to light my way and I trust them." Her lips quirked into a smile. "And you know how I am when I get angry."
"Ahahaha," I laughed nervously.
"Let this begin a new era for you," she said. "As I have begun one myself." I yawned and she said, "I should let you sleep. Rarity and Sweetie are probably worried about you."
"Sweetie is, I pray, completely unconscious and blissfully unaware," I told Luna. "Rarity, on the other hand, may still be up."
"We will talk more tomorrow," Luna said.
"Wait," I said. "There is another thing." I yawned. "The Elements of Power. I think it possible we may be able to bring them around but they will need a patron or they will evaporate."
"Just what I was thinking," Luna said to me. "I am willing to take them under my wing."
I gave a sigh of relief. "They fought to protect the children. And it will make Pinkie very happy."
"Even more incentive," Luna said. "Let us get you to bed, then I have to go see my ministers."
We rose and headed out.
***************
I walked into our suite; Sweetie was asleep in the middle of the bed with a cloth over her eyes. Rarity was in the corner, sitting sphinx style, quietly sewing a cape and humming a little tune; she'd already dressed for bed. "Hello, Marcus darling," she said softly. "How did it go?"
I came over and sat down by her. "Close your eyes," I said softly.
She blinked and did so and I gently took her hoof and brought it up to my invisible horn. Her breath caught, and then I slowly lowered her hoof to the ground once more. "Celestia and Luna have marked me as theirs," I whispered to her. Best we not wake up Sweetie.
She licked her lips nervously. "Earlier..."
"That was Celestia just trying to make me die of embarrassment," I told her. I should ask her, but now I'm afraid to. I should tell her everything but I'm afraid to do that too. But I have to. Especially...
We are close, but... I don't even know how to tell with a pony, really. Or whether... AAAARGH.
Too many questions, no answers, can't go forward, can't retreat, can't run away.
"We should go to bed," she said.
"I'm going to get clean and change; I'll join you soon," I told her.
I now made a surprising discovery. I now had my tattoo on BOTH buttocks. What the hell? I'm pretty sure I just had it on one before.
Dammit, this will make it even HARDER to hide it.
"Is something wrong?" Rarity asked from outside the bathroom.
I'm externalizing my internal monologue again. Crap.
"I'm fine, I just dropped the soap," I told her.
I heard hoof shuffling noises and my eyes crossed.
Do not run screaming away, I told myself.
I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around myself, then opened the door a little. "Are you okay?" I asked. Towel, STAY UP.
She licked her lips nervously, looked back at the bed, where Sweetie was flailing. "Sweetie kept kicking me," she said and sighed.
"I'll be done in a minute," I told her. "We can... umm... something. I have no idea what to do about that."
"We'll figure out something, darling," she said, smiling. She seemed to have her footing back.
I closed the door and finished bathing, dried myself off, and then came back out. We ended up having to wake Sweetie... then get her back to sleep, which took FOREVER.
Sleep finally ate me alive and it was a BLESSING.
**************
Rarity shaved me in the morning; I like to be clean shaven. "Luna and Celestia have a busy morning but we will meet with Luna to make plans this afternoon, which means we have the morning to ourselves."
"Well, we could go see Canterlot," I told her. "I could do with more clothing and I have money."
"Since there isn't time or materials or all my tools here, yes," she said. "And I should check on new fashion."
"Sounds fun," I told her. "We should probably get Sweetie more formal clothing too. Or does she have plans?"
"Dash is going to take the kids hang-gliding," Rarity said. "So we can have a little time alone without child-wrangling."
Good. I like Sweetie, but those kids... you have to wrangle them all the time or they run riot. "I'd take your arm, but it would make it hard for you to walk," I said.
She laughed and then looked thoughtful. "It would be hard for you as well." She put on a purple dress and donned her magical hat. I donned mine and we headed out. Breakfast was at a pastry shop she recommended. The fruit tarts were VERY good, I have to say.
We then went walking around what I assume is the noble and wealthy merchant shopping district, with me doing a lot of commentary on how various outfits looked. Rarity also picked up some expensive fabrics for outfits and spent some time studying fashions for male stallions as well. Logical, given I'm sure half her customers are men.
I got a lot of odd looks, understandably. You have humans in Canterlot, but most stores here either cater to ponies or bipeds but not both. One exception was Five Horse Hitch, which actually had outfits for humanoids and ponies. Rarity wasn't too happy with their pony fashions, but I got to show off in several outfits. "I like this black one a lot," she told me, when I got to suit number four.
So I bought it. I love having a bag full of coins and gems. It's like having infinite potential. I just have to be careful not to blow it all.
I wore said black suit out and stowed my red suit in Rarity's saddlebags. You know, you could shoplift like crazy with those. Not that Rarity ever would.
Gives me ideas, but I'm not going to do anything to get Rarity in trouble.
We passed a jeweler and I saw something I had to get. Not for me; for Rarity. Earrings of the constellation the Archer with fine platinum chains holding little topazes in place to act as the stars. And each topaz glowed softly. Simple magic, but effective. "I have to run in here," I told her.
"So tempted," she mumbled, then shook her head. "I had best stay out here," she said, though her eyes clearly coveted most of what was on display.
"Be right back," I told her, then went in. The jeweler was a green coated, blue and red maned earth pony stallion wearing a jeweler's loop and one of those collars that ponies often wear to indicate formality, professionalism, or rank. "Good day, sir. I would like to sell you two jewels and buy something from your window."
I laid out two rubies. He studied them, then said, "Elvish style but human made. Nicely done. White Plume Mountain?"
I started. "How did you know?"
He showed me one of the facets. It had a tiny 'K' on it. "Keraptis has gnomes who dig up gems inside his volcano," he said. "Very high quality. What are you looking for?"
I pointed it out and he got it. He also looked outside at Rarity, who was very clearly staring down the street and NOT looking at the window AT ALL. I smiled a little and so did he.
He studied me assessingly and I made the earrings dance in the air. I could feel... I think I was sensing my own magic with the horn Celestia stuck on me. Very strange feeling. His eyes widened slightly, and he said, "Interesting. Well, this will definitely please her."
"I hope so. She has been very generous to me and I wish to repay her."
We haggled, set a price and I got some change back. Then I brought them out to her, in a small box. "For you, fair lady Rarity."
Her eyes widened. "For me?"
"Of course," I said. "A doubly apt gift, for the fair lady and archer."
She smiled brightly and put them on immediately. "Thank you, Marcus darling. I hope they're accurate or Twilight will complain."
I laughed. "She will no doubt try to fix them if they are not but they look right to me. She's the expert, though."
"I will have to buy you something, darling," she said thoughtfully.
"As you like, fair lady," I told her. I really can't tell if she fancies me or if she just plays the game well. Or decide what I want. Celestia could have been hinting about her or Twilight.
Dammit, she is going to kill me so much when I tell her. But I'm going to have to.
For a moment, the urge to run away was intense, but then Rarity asked, "What's wrong, Marcus?"
"Let's find a cafe. I could use a snack and a drink and I have to tell you something." Before I lose the guts to do so.
***********
We stopped at a nuts and coffee cafe. They had a bunch of kinds of nuts and nut-derived goods and they had coffee and tea. I got some Sindhi coffee, nice and black. Rarity got a coffee with so much fruit juice, milk, special blending, chocolate, etc, that it was hardly even coffee.
And I had a nice bowl of cashews. Rarity got mixed nuts. I would have gotten it but it had almonds in it, which I hate.
"It would appear I've been reincarnating for a century or so," I told Rarity. "I was seeking immortality on the path of the Polymath, which requires reincarnation and repeating the same quest over and over in a series of lives. But something went wrong when I got killed saving Yalla after we raided Marquetta's lair. My patron, Bastet, abandoned me and I kept reincarnating, due to my sword. But it only works every few months." I sipped my coffee. I need to talk to Fluttershy.
She sipped her drink and ate some nuts, frowning. "She abandoned you?" Her voice was taut.
"Yes," I told her. "Luna talked to her, but she wasn't very communicative." I sighed. "Anyway, much of my past is still a blur but Luna and Celestia have put their mark on me and I serve them now."
"And gave you a horn," she said softly.
I laughed nervously. "I can feel magic through it."
"Yes," she said. "I wonder if this means you can get a Cutie Mark now." She looked thoughtful as she raised her cup to her lips, drinking delicately.
"I can join the Cutie Mark Crusaders," I said, then we both laughed.
"I think they'd be thrilled," Rarity said. "Thank you for being so helpful with Sweetie."
"She's a good girl," I told her. "Kids are rambunctious but they can't help it."
"Anyway, I can teach you about using it," Rarity said. "Your horn. I wish I could see it."
"Hmm, Twilight probably has a spell for seeing invisible things she could teach you," I told her. "Or cast for you."
"So you've turned into many different kinds of creatures?" Rarity said thoughtfully, then worked on her nuts.
"Yes, but I'm not sure what, though I think definitely Elves, Humans, Dwarves, and Halflings." I told her. "Most of my recent memories are all human, I think."
"Ever been a Pony?" she asked lightly.
I sipped my coffee thoughtfully, waiting to see if I was going to flashback.
No flashback, but that could just mean I am no longer going senile due to a soul-patch from Celestia and Luna. Or that having twice the tattoo is warding my mind. Which would mean my mind is in my butt. Sadly, that wouldn't surprise me too much at this point.
"I don't remember being a pony but I hardly remember a lot of it," I told her.
"You should try it," she said.
Is that flirting or is it just her thinking being a pony is cool because she is pony the way I am wondering what human Rarity would look like. "I would need some proper pony clothing," I said. "Or I'd get embarrassed"
"That can be arranged," she said, making her scissors come out and fly around.
I couldn't say no now. "I will give it a try some time," I said, knowing I was setting my DEATH SENTENCE by doing so.
She smiled brightly. "If there is a costume party, we could each go as the other's species."
I laughed. "I fear it would be hard for me to pass as you, without the use of your hat, anyway."
"Tell me what you know about the reincarnation," she said and I told her what I knew as we snacked and drank.
"And Marquetta simply is angry over the sword and you taking it," Rarity said.
"Yes," I said.
I hope she can't attack us here, though Rarity fights well.
"Anyway, you and Luna and Celestia are the only ones who know the whole thing," I told her. "Twilight knows a fair amount; she helped to study me. I think I was starting to wear out by now, though." I frowned at the thought. "If I seem afraid, it's because I've seen too many friends and acquaintances get hurt or die."
"It's okay," Rarity said, patting my hand with a hoof. She took a sip of her 'coffee' and then said, "It makes you gentler than many humans and I like that."
"Thanks," I told her.
"I've met humans before, but I know you and Ivan the best," she said, then finished off her coffee. She studied the inside of her glass and ate more of her mixed nuts.
I munched on cashews and said, "I've met lots of ponies. I think even Odo knew ponies, as he came from Minrothad."
"I've noticed you seem quite comfortable with us."
"Is that unusual?" I said. "Ponies are quite easy to get along with as long as you have basic manners."
"A lot of humans have a hard time treating us as adults," Rarity said. "In my experience and the stories I've heard." She paused. "Those of us who ARE adults, that is."
"I'm a big pony!," I said, imitating Apple Bloom and Rarity laughed. "Look at my TAIL."
Rarity laughed even more. "Yes."
"Only a fool would not treat you as adults after what I've seen," I told her. "You are a magnificent archer, mighty in your wrath, and a brilliant fashion designer, insightful and generous."
She smiled. "You are such a flatterer Marcus, you are very gracious and charming and a pleasure to spend time with. And also quite intelligent."
I wish I was quite intelligent. "Thank you, fair lady." I finished my coffee. "Ready to go?"
She paused, looked nervous, looked around at the many ponies present, then said, "Let's go."
We then hit up a pair of fashion places which catered to bipeds. One of them was an extension of a Thyatian chain of boutiques, the other run by a mix of ponies and bipeds.
The first one made me rather nervous because there was a picture of Erik of Vestland with the offer of 50,000 Thyatian gold coins for my head, posted just inside the place. Rarity bought me a nice black and gold outfit as a thank you for the earrings. But I got out of there as quickly as I could, discreetly.
The second one, we browsed endlessly without buying anything. Or at least I didn't. Rarity was busy wandering around through the women's section, studying things while I lost myself in clothing.
Lots of things I would have liked to buy but I am trying to be cautious and not just blow everything in an orgy of purchases like I usually do. Having someone with me helped.
We were about to go get lunch when a letter fell on my head. It was from Twilight, inviting us to meet her and her parents for lunch at a cafe in town. I was a little nervous, though surely they won't recognize me, but I couldn't say no.
So we headed off to The Oak Nook, which was inside a huge oak tree. To my surprise, Fluttershy was with Twilight, though I soon saw it was because the place had a lot of animals who assisted the staff. There were platforms on some of the branches of the tree or you could eat in the main dining; we were out on a branch over the street. Twilight's mother, Night Shining and her father, Crescent Moon, were here, dressed for work (admittedly this meant a formal collar, a tie for him, a starry cloak for her, and semi-conical hats for both of them). Her father is an astronomer and her mother is a diviner. I suppose Crescent Moon probably answers to Princess Luna now.
Stay calm, no fear, they can't know who I am.
As we approached, down in the street, there was a thunder of hooves and some crazy dark haired Northman roared down the street in a black chariot pulled by black stallions.
Wait...
Oh great, that lunatic Magnus is here.
Magnus is from the Soderfjord Jarldoms, but acts as security officer for an estate of a wealthy Alphatian down in the Ierendi islands. This leaves him a lot of free time during which he gets in trouble. I had an encounter with him which ended with me throwing myself off a ship to get away from him because... okay, I DID do it.
But I wasn't going to let a crazy Northman take me captive.
I still don't understand why he rides around in a chariot but hopefully, I won't have to find out.
Twilight's parents watched him go, surprised. Fluttershy was too busy cuddling the squirrel who brought her menu to care. Twilight blinked.
"Hello, everyone," Rarity said. "I am Rarity Belle, a friend of Twilight's, and this is my dear friend, Samus Marcus of Thyatis, special agent of Celestia and Luna, a unicorn human."
"It's a pleasure to meet you," I said, bowing. "Your daughter is both intelligent and wise, a strong combination. You raised her well." Kissing parent ass, something I am good at as long as they don't hate me on sight.
I decided not to go for the formal hand... hoof kiss, given they're more academic than aristocratic. I would have pulled up a chair for Rarity... but no chairs. Which will make this tricky for me.
A badger now brought me a bean bag, which will have to do. Hopefully, there's some things edible for humans here.
"Thank you," Crescent Moon said, studying me and especially my sword.
Night Shining smiled, but said, "There are human unicorns?" She looked understandably confused.
The salt shaker, shaped like a cute bunny, now danced at my command. "My horn is invisible, so I can do covert operations," I told them.
Their eyes widened for a moment, then they relaxed. I then realized Twilight didn't know about the horn, but didn't seem surprised. I guess Celestia told her.
Fluttershy finally looked up from animal cuddling. "Hello, Rarity," she said, smiling. "Hello, Marcus."
"Marcus, this is my father, Crescent Moon, and my mother, Night Shining. Father works for the Star Ministry as an astronomer and Mother works for the Information Ministry as a Diviner," Twilight said.
"It's nice to meet you," Night Shining said. "Do you live here in Canterlot, then?"
"I live wherever the Princesses choose to send me," I told them. I wonder how much Twilight has told them about our mission.
"Some of it is classified," Twilight said apologetically.
"Are you involved in the Erik of Vestland case?" Night Shining asked.
STAY CALM. I'd likely break a leg if I jumped from this height, anyway.
"Which case?" I asked. "There are a lot of open ones, I think." TWITCH DO NOT SHOW TWITCH.
I studied the menu. It was a mix of pony-only items (like hay salads), human edible vegetarian (the bean soup looked pretty good, in fact), and several items that were expensive but had MEAT (STEAK TIME!!!!)
"Fluttershy, is this place run by druids?"
"Yes," she said. "One of the cooks is an Elf, so I recommended it."
"Thank you," I told her.
"Apparently he stole the harem of a Thyatian Ambassador and mocked your emperor, AND wore some sort of sacred hat," Crescent Moon said. "And a lot of other things, but that was the main incident I'm involved with."
"The Sacred Hat of Valerias," Night Shining said. "And something about a sandwich."
"A criminal sandwich?" I said, trying to sound amused.
"He was in White Plume Mountain along with a double of some kind," Fluttershy said.
DAMMIT FLUTTERSHY!!!!!
"I'm currently dealing with the aftermath of our trip to the Malpheggi," I told Night Shining. "Is the Information Bureau looking for him?"
"They were slaves," Twilight said. "Thyatian harems DESERVE to be free." Her voice was firm.
"I agree," I said. "How did a sacred hat and a sandwich come into it, though?" The sacred hat was, in fact, a much older incident.
I think.
Rarity studied the menu, listening quietly. Fluttershy was now busy talking to a raven.
"The list of accusations are rather long and confusing and some of them seem unsubstantiated," Night Shining said. "But some of them are clearly his fault." She sighed. "He seemed like such a nice boy but it's clear he needs to go to jail."
"He does NOT need to go to jail! I'm sure there's a good reason for all those FALSE accusations," Twilight said, clearly annoyed.
"Dear, I know you liked him but the evidence is pretty strong that he committed crimes, even if some of them would not be considered crimes in Equestria," Night Shining said. "And you will likely never see him again, so you really ought to move on."
"He was at White Plume Mountain, but we missed him," Fluttershy said.
The waitress now arrived, a chestnut pony with a green mane in pig-tails. She had glasses on and a silver torc. "Hello, everyone," she said. "Welcome to The Oak Nook." She put down glasses of black tea for Twilight's parents and apple juice for Fluttershy and coffee with cream and sugar for Twilight. "I can take your orders and the drink orders for the new guests."
"I'll have some apple juice," I said. Best not to have too much coffee.
"Orange juice for me, dear," Rarity said, still studying her menu.
Everyone began ordering; I ordered the bean soup and the steak. Elven steak is very good.
Once the waitress was gone, Twilight said, "I am NOT waiting for him! I have lots of things in my life and I do not mope about it! But I don't like people badmouthing him."
Hello, guilt. Hello knife in gut. Twist, twist that knife, guilt. Damn you, guilt.
"Rarity, I like your earrings," Fluttershy said, smiling. "They're very pretty."
Bless you, Fluttershy.
"Marcus bought them for me," Rarity said, turning to show them off to Twilight and her parents.
"Ooh, the Archer," Crescent Moon said. "An excellent choice. The archer is focused and insightful, striking to the heart of the matter," he said. "A good match for you, from what Twilight has told us."
"They're very lovely," Night Shining said, approvingly.
"I agree, they really suit you," Fluttershy said.
"Thank you," Rarity said, basking in the praise like a cat in the sun. "I bought Marcus the suit he's wearing as a token of my appreciation."
I rose and turned so they could see it all.
"The glows do not match their orders of magnitude," Twilight said.
I glared at her. TWILIGHT!
"But it's very pretty," she said hastily. "It looks wonderful, Rarity."
Now, though, Twilight's parents studied me assessingly. Urk. I hope I didn't just remind me... remind THEM of Erik.
"Thank you, Twilight," Rarity said.
"Anyway, there's a large price on his head now," Night Shining said. "Which means some lunatic bounty hunter will likely catch him and turn him over to the Thyatians."
ACK.
Rarity frowned. "We saw a posting. Fifty thousand gold is quite a lot."
RARITY!!!!
Twilight grimaced, clearly unhappy. You and me both!
Our food came now and we all began eating, while Twilight fumed and her mother continued to natter on about how Erik was being hunted and Twilight needed to forget he ever existed, while her father looked embarrassed but didn't DO anything about it.
My steak was perfect, the beans were okay but not awesome. Fluttershy's tomato salad looked much better, though I wouldn't have fed half of it to various small animals.
I could tell Rarity wasn't happy with listening to Twilight's mother beat her point to death with a hammer, but wasn't going to stick herself inbetween a mother and a daughter. I kept my mouth shut for fear of somehow giving myself away.
Magnus zoomed past the place again but now a dozen city watchponies were chasing him and I couldn't help but laugh. Twilight's father laughed as well. He now said, "I understand you do some wizardry, Marcus?"
"Of course," I said, tapping my invisible horn. Play to those prejudices! "Twilight has been helping me to work with electrical magic." I called up a single small lightning ball and tossed it to her. She spun it on the tip of her horn, then passed it back to me. We showed off while Fluttershy's head bobbed back and forth, following it.
I could feel the magical flows in a way that is hard to explain in words. I normally have to cast a spell to get more than a vague sense of magic in action but I could feel it, the way I hear or see or... like a new sense. I could feel Rarity using small amounts to work her spoon and cup, could feel Twilight working magical fields; this helped us work together even better than before.
Twilight's parents were smiling, clearly proud of their daughter.
Rarity said, "I think you're scaring the animals, Twilight, dear."
Fluttershy was trying to reassure some of the servitor animals and the manager was now coming our way. Ack.
We got a strong 'request' not to throw such things around, however good we are at controlling them, and now we both looked embarrassed.
"Hi, sis!" Sweetie shouted from above us.
"..." I boggled openly (most of the time I can hide my bogglement. Or so I think).
We looked up and saw the CMC and Dash in the air above us along with Ditzy Doo, flying around. I think Ditzy and Dash were generating updrafts to help keep the CMC in the air.
Sweetie tried to throw something down at us, but the updrafts caught it and now paper hearts went flying all over the neighborhood, raining down on confused ponies and a few bipeds.
I blinked. What on earth is she doing?
Rarity looked embarrassed, then began plucking hearts out of the air. "Let me help," Twilight said. They wove their abilities with Rarity guiding Twilight's power and sucked up all the falling hearts into a small pile by the table.
"What is Sweetie doing?" Twilight asked Rarity.
"I don't know," Rarity said. "I'll talk to her later."
Ditzy now flew down to us. "I'm sorry about that," she said. "I'll talk to Sweetie."
"It was very sweet of her," Fluttershy said; she was clearly amused.
"She's a good girl," Rarity said. "But children are hard to run herd on," she said to Twilight's parents.
"When Twilight was little, she read this really scary story, so she built a fortress out of most of the books in the house to hide inside," Night Shining said, grinning in that parent ratting out their child way.
"MOM!" Twilight said, embarrassed.
"I will have to tell Spike that story," I said.
"No, please!" Twilight said.
"If the monsters can't see me they can't eat me," her father said, and laughed. "But then she tried to read one of them and it fell on her."
"Daaaaad!"
The rest of the meal was eaten up by embarrassing childhood Twilight stories.
************
Rarity went to see Sweetie before the meeting; I went to see Ivan. He was in the practice room, with one of Celestia's warponies trying to show him how to fight with a hammer. Unfortunately, said warpony used his own hammer with his mouth, which is not the Ivan way.
I came and sparred with them a little, then stole Ivan to get him cleaned up before the meeting. "You feeling better now?" I asked him. "You looked pissed last night."
"I am pissed," he said. "Bastet is an ASS. I'm surprised you're not pissed off."
"Remember the Thyatian job?"
"WHICH one?" he said, then shook his head. "You're not really Thyatian, though." He paused. "I think."
"If I could even remember being abandoned, I'd be angrier," I said, then sighed. "You're a good friend, Ivan."
"Oh, Helga is going to chew furniture when she hears about this. You know how she is."
I smiled. Yes. "She's a good friend too. I wish she wasn't out of the business."
We reached his room, which I now realized he had to himself. "You going to bathe?" he asked.
"I'm fine, just going to wash my face," I told him. "I... Look, Ivan..."
"I won't say anything," he said. "But the longer you hide it, the more you will die when the truth outs."
"How did I get this face, Ivan?" I asked him urgently. "They think I died recently."
"That's how you got your current face," he said.
"I thought the people at Franich House arranged it as part of my payment," I said.
"You'd changed bodies when I found you drunk and bitter and dragged you off on my quest. I don't know exactly what happened," he said, frowning. "You thought Franich House did it?"
I slumped down by the wall. "Now I wonder how much of anything in my head is reliable." DAMMIT.
"I'm sorry, man," he said. "Do you remember anything?"
I thought hard. "Maybe... something about a woman... who turned into a monster..." Damn me.
Ivan laughed briefly, then sighed. "Anyway, I'm gonna bathe." He got up and finished stripping. "I've never seen you die but I never knew how you survived a few times, but I guess now I know."
"Could it have been Marquetta?," I speculated.
"She would have had no reason unless she knew it was you and then she would have taken the sword," Ivan said. He headed off to take a bath.
Dammit, unless...How much does Luna know? She never said 'I know you are Erik', but if anyone can fix these holes in my memories....
Well, we'll have to see. Dammit.
I went and washed my face, then once Ivan was clean, we went to join the others.
***********
"I'm sorry I made a mess," Sweetie said to me. She sounded embarrassed.
"It's fine," I told her.
We had reached the meeting room but Luna was delayed by a meeting. So everyone was snacking and waiting.
"I just wanted to help," she said to my knees.
By raining down hearts?
"We had a good time with Twilight's parents." Part of the time. "So thank you," I told her. Then I handed her a can of mixed nuts. "You can save these for when you're hungry. I know your sister favors them, so I hope you do too."
She smiled and took it, putting it in her saddlebags. "Thanks, Marcus." She paused. "That's the right thing to call you, right?"
"Yes," I told her. "If we have time, I'll teach you another card trick tonight."
"Cool!" she said. That finished perking her back up.
I noticed Luna watching me; she'd come in without me noticing, but she was smiling, so I relaxed as Sweetie bobbed off to huddle with her friends and plot... something.
Maybe she was trying to matchmake with Rarity and I. I wish I had a spell to tell what people are thinking.
But then, I'd get mad if someone did that to me, so I shouldn't want it.
WANT IT SO MUCH.
Surely she'd be more overt about it if she was romantically interested, though, right? Rarity strikes me as the type who goes for what she wants.
Celestia seems... or was she talking about Twilight and I? I know Twilight's mind well enough to know what she considers romantic, but not Rarity. I need to find out.
I don't know what I will do if she is interested. Beyond probably running screaming and jumping out a window or something.
I like her, and if we were both the same species, I think I could really go for her. But she's a pony and I'm human and... aaargh.
"What's wrong?" Luna said softly. Everyone else was getting ready now that Luna was here.
I whispered to her. "Apparently, I died, totally forgot about it, shortly before heading into the Malpheggi. I think some woman turned into a monster to kill me." I sighed. "But she didn't rob me, which is weird."
Luna frowned. "That is strange."
"I'll let you know if I remember more," I told her.
She nodded and then I went and sat down by Rarity.
Celestia now entered, to Luna's surprise. She came over and nuzzled Twilight. "Did your meeting with your parents go well?"
"About half well and about half them talking about how Erik is the most terrible person ever to walk the world," Twilight said, irritated. She quickly calmed down from Celestia's cuddling, though. "Someone's put a price on his head."
Celestia frowned. "That is most certainly not allowed in Equestria. I will see about ensuring no one advertises that price here."
Twilight looked greatly relieved.
Celestia now loomed over me and descended on me for a hug. "You're so cuddly, Marcus."
"..." Brain blowing out now.
Rarity blinked, then said, "No hug for me?" sadly.
"Of course," Celestia said and embraced her. "I just have to get Marcus adapted to pony-embraces. Since I'm sure he'll be getting lots of them."
CELESTIA!!!!!!
"Like this!" Pinkie said, jumping on me.
"PILE ON!" Rainbow Dash shouted.
I was soon buried and laughing but struggling to breathe. Even Twilight piled on, though Rarity was still being held by Celestia; she was smiling and laughing gently.
Sweetie stuck her head in. "Princess Celestia, are you free?"
"I have to go to a meeting dear, but we could talk as we walk," she said very seriously to Sweetie, as she let go of Rarity.
"The Princess is very busy," Rarity said to Sweetie. "I can probably take care of whatever the problem is."
"No, no, this is for her," Sweetie said urgently. "Okay, I'll walk with you."
Celestia said her goodbyes and went with Sweetie.
"Tonight, after the moon raising, I will attempt a scrying," Luna said. "Twilight, you and Marcus and Moondancer will assist me."
"Of course," Twilight said.
"And the orchestra will play, so you will need to be there, Lyra," Luna said. "The rest of you may come if you like."
Lyra laughed nervously. "Okay."
"I have a crazy idea," Rainbow Dash said.
"Go on?" Luna said curiously.
"See, one of us could pretend to be a bounty hunter who captured Marcus to bring him in to Marquetta, hoping for a reward, and that would enable one of us to infiltrate the base and maybe even lure her into a trap to make an 'exchange'," Rainbow Dash said.
"She knows what we look like, Dash," Applejack said.
"One swallow of Ivan's magic potion and we look like anypony we want," Dash said. "I could be... Shining Star. I always liked that name. You'd be my partner and we'd offer to trade Marcus for money, but she has to come to the Vale of Traps or whatever, and then when she comes, AMBUSH TIME."
"We have to find her first," Twilight said. "And it's a big risk for you too. How would you explain you know she wants him?"
"It's... umm... damn," Rainbow Dash said. "I don't know."
We discussed some more plans, but we have the problem that until we find her, we can only plan vaguely. So it was not the most productive of meetings. Twilight, Rarity, Spike and I went to the library to do some study of scrying magic, so we could make an effort ourselves in addition to tonight's scrying. If nothing else, it would be a good area to develop for the future.
Though Rarity hadn't been there then, it felt like the old days of my time in Canterlot. Rarity had her glasses on... I didn't even know she wore them. But at least for this she donned them and the two of us worked with her, as she wanted to help but she basically hasn't engaged in broad theoretical study of magic. Admittedly, I've only done it in a half-assed way, so Twilight had to teach me some things as well.
"Treat it like a loom," Spike said to Rarity at one point. "The cystillic lines are the weft and the daristic lines are the woof. Except this loom, you can pluck the threads like a harp, then you 'feel' the vibrations. The intersection of the two threads with the vibration you want is where your target is. I think."
Rarity's eyes widened and she smiled warmly at Spike. "Thank you. That's a very good metaphor and I see it now."
"That's great, Spike," I told him. I don't know which one is woof and which one is weft, but I know enough about weaving to see what he means.
"Thanks, Marcus," he said, forgetting to hate me, though he made sure to glare AFTER that.
Twilight gave a happy sigh. "Even studying is better with people you care about."
Spike looked embarrassed. "I like you too," he mumbled.
"Sometimes you need some solitude to really focus on something," Rarity said. "But I find company makes most burdens lighter."
"Exactly," Twilight said. "Remember the time we tried to analyze the gorgon blood, Spike?"
He groaned. "I TOLD you it had already been done."
"I know, I should have listened," she said ruefully. "It would have saved me a lot of work. But you were very patient with me."
"I was so hungry by the end," he mumbled.
That reminded me. "Rarity, why did you have Twist buy you those raisins?"
She looked embarrassed. "I forgot I had them; they were to be snacks for the kids on the train."
"You forgot to give us snacks?" a stack of books said nearby. "Oh man!"
"..."
"They weren't supposed to notice we're here, Scootaloo!" Apple Bloom said urgently.
Twilight and Rarity laughed. Rarity laughs like a babbling brook, Twilight like a gentle rain. Spike laughs like an avalanche. He marched over and plucked back cloaks. "Where's Sweetie?" he asked.
"Nowhere," Apple Bloom said.
"She's not doing anything at all," Scootaloo said. "Plan B!"
They both ran for the door.
Twilight plucked them off the ground. "Young ladies, what are you up to? You're supposed to be under Ditzy's supervision."
"She and Dinky are taking naptime but we all had things to do," Scootaloo said. She laughed nervously. "Not that we're doing anything at all and certainly no one left the castle or anything."
Well, crap.
"Where did they go?" I said sternly.
"Nowhere AT ALL," Scootaloo said.
"Perhaps we can use the scrying magic to find them," Rarity said. "It would be a good test, yes?"
"Great idea," Twilight said. "We'll have to go to the lab and borrow the ritual components."
The scrying ritual required various components; it wasn't something to use super-lightly. But being agents of the Princesses has its advantages.
And we needed a test. So Spike and I herded Apple Bloom and Scootaloo, following the ladies. "Why were you two spying on us?" I asked.
"We were not spying on you," Scootaloo said. "At all."
"We just wanted to read some books, that's all, perfectly innocent!" Apple Bloom protested.
"And you were hiding because?" I asked.
"We didn't want to disturb your important work!" Apple Bloom said.
Now, see, this is in the right direction; make the other person feel more important by praise. But it doesn't work if you're clearly GUILTY unless your target has a really easily pushable button.
"It is important but you could have just been quiet," Twilight said. Okay, Twilight has some button. "But you were watching us for some reason. Why?"
"Probably to keep watch because they're setting up a prank on us," Spike said.
"It's not a prank! It's very important!" Scootaloo said.
"What is?" I asked.
"NOTHING!"
We went round this mulberry bush all the way to the lab.
************
Rarity carefully mixed the chemicals as Twilight read off the formula to her; Spike and I kept the two fillies under control. I herded Apple Bloom, Spike handled Scootaloo.
Once they were mixed, Twilight took a brush and used them as ink on paper to inscribe a series of runes, then placed a mirror in the center and they both began chanting; I could feel the flows of power through my horn, though I didn't know how to interpret it. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom now watched, fascinated.
The mirror fogged over and then you could see Sweetie and Twist in a fashion store, studying men's fashions for some reason. With some effort, Twilight panned around to get the name of the place 'High Spirits For Him'. In fact, it was men's fashion for ponies only, so why were Sweetie and Twist there? I suppose Twist might have a brother, but why sneak out?
"Why this charade?" I asked Apple Bloom.
"Ponies aren't good at charades," she said.
I suppose not but that's not what I meant.
"Are Sweetie or Twist planning to dress as men for some reason?" I asked.
"That wouldn't work well at all," Scootaloo said. "They couldn't fool anyone."
We then went to wake up Ditzy so we could hand over our prisoners and head for the store.
************
'High Spirits For Him' was still standing on our arrival. A half dozen customers were busy checking out outfits or being fitted by the clerks, while one of the clerks was busy talking to Sweetie Belle and Twist, who thankfully didn't seem to be causing trouble except for sneaking off when they were supposed to be NAPPING.
But when they saw us, they took off running, crashing into a rack which fell into another rack, which set off two racks... You know how it goes.
I managed to reach out and stop part of the cascade with a spell and Rarity stemmed the tide by seizing several and once Twilight got over her shock, she saved about half the store, leaving the other half fallen down.
The chestnut maned clerk made unhappy noises and fainted at the mess.
"Sweetie!" I said.
"Twist, you know better than this," Twilight said, then sighed.
"It was fine before you scared us!" Twist protested.
We began helping the clerks to straighten everything up. How do parents not go insane before their children grow up?
I do not know.
Sweetie and Twist helped as well, though it was easier for Twist, who could use her tail as well as her mouth. They worked together, looking guilty.
"What are you two doing here, anyway?" Rarity asked, once we'd made apologies and herded them out the door.
"Umm...," Sweetie said, sweating.
"We were going to get something nice for Sweetie's dad," Twist said with a quick smoothness I both admired and suspected was a well-practiced lie.
"If you had told me, I would be happy to have taken you," Rarity said. "But you two need to lie down so you don't fall asleep tonight too early."
They seemed horrified by that prospect and I smiled a little. Find the lever and push, as they say.
"I thought you were busy studying," Sweetie grumbled.
"Studying how to see people at a distance," Twilight said.
"DOH," Twist said, slapping her face, which I would think would hurt with hooves.
"We saw through your spies with our Unicorn Vision," Twilight said. She had a quirky smile; I think she's teasing them.
"I don't have any Unicorn Vision," Sweetie grumbled.
"When you're older," Rarity said.
We really shouldn't tease them like this but it's too much fun. "You lie down and I'll teach you another card trick when your nap is done," I told Sweetie.
"Yaay!"
As we walked down the street, we saw some of Celestia's warponies tearing down the bounty notices. Good for them. They saluted Twilight, who saluted them back.
"Do you know who put out this bounty?" I asked them. I had been too nervous to look closely.
"The Thyatian Embassy," the warpony said.
Damn. Hmm, fifty thousand is probably about what the value of that guy's harem was.
I hope they're all okay. About the best I could do was get them on a caravan to Darokin while I went another way to draw off the pursuit.
"I wouldn't need fifty-thousand to turn that bastard in," Spike grumbled.
"SPIKE," Twilight said angrily. "I am sure he's innocent."
"What exactly did he do to the Thyatians?" Twist asked curiously.
"After what he did to you, he deserves anything that happens to him," Spike said hotly.
"It's okay," Twilight said. "I understand why he did it now. If we hadn't been drunk, I could have reassured him before he panicked." She sighed.
Knife, gut, conscience runs through my mind, laughing and stabbing.
Thanks, conscience.
Rarity licked her lips nervously, and Twist said to her, "Would you like some candy? You look hungry."
"Any chance of a fruit gummy?" Rarity asked.
A what?
Fruit gummies turned out to be a fruit-flavored candy with sugar on it that is... I don't know how to describe it unless you've had one. It's a little denser than gelatin but still much less crispy / chewy than a hard candy. And they're very tasty, I found out.
"I'm surprised they're advertising here when he's probably not in Canterlot," Twist said.
Unless they somehow know I am here due to scrying or something. But the picture on the posts shows me as Erik, so no one would recognize me.
Dammit.
Them finding me so fast worries me.
But I can't tell anyone, DAMMIT.
"He probably followed us back so he could make a bigger mess for me to clean up," Spike grumbled.
Sorry, Spike.
The urge to just confess was strong but I choked it down. Can't risk a giant explosion until this is all cleared up.
We herded the kids back to the castle and turned them over to Ditzy, who hopefully would stay awake and watch them this time.
Hope springs eternal.
***********
I got out my deck of cards and shuffled; the cards felt oddly good in my hands. I mean, it's always fun but there was something... I cast my telekinesis spell and tried shuffling them with that; it was easier than I would have thought. Sweetie watched, eyes wide. It was just the two of us before dinner; Rarity had gone to lay out in the sun with Twilight and some of the others. Ditzy, Lyra, and Bon-Bon were, in theory, running herd on the other kids.
"Magic shuffling," Sweetie said reverently. I fought not to laugh.
I was sitting on the bed; she was standing, watching.
I then passed her the cards and tried to guide her in working on her shuffling. It's actually trickier than you'd think because you're manipulating a lot of objects at once, though you can force them together to make them more manipulable.
"It's hard," Sweetie said as the cards went flying.
"Don't give up," I told her. "You can do it, just keep trying."
And trying and trying. She tried to give up three times but I wouldn't let her quit and gradually, she got more fluid at it. She's got to master both shuffling and rigging the shuffle, which we also worked on, though I made sure to tell her to NOT do the latter when playing with others. Unless they deserved it, of course.
She finally got to where all the cards stayed together, but her efforts at rigging the shuffle were REALLY obvious. But that's okay. It takes a LOT of practice. Just being able to smoothly shuffle and deal was a good start; the tricky bits will build on that.
She was kind of blown by the time it was time for dinner, so I had to carry her. Even fillies are HEAVY.
I encountered Celestia in the hallway on the way there. "Hello, your highness," Sweetie mumbled.
"I see you ran her ragged," Celestia said to me.
"Hello, Princess Celestia," I said to her. "She was practicing her telekinesis with me."
"Just like a good father," Celestia said with her 'teasing' voice.
"I don't know if I'd be a good father," I told her thoughtfully. "But thank you."
"I have a father already," Sweetie said weakly.
"Of course," I told her.
Celestia studied me curiously, then said, "So you're ready for us to make centaur babies together?"
"..."
"NO!" Sweetie said loudly, then hid her face.
"Let's not discuss baby-making in front of a child," I said firmly to Celestia.
"We have someone else for you to make babies with if you really need to!" Sweetie said urgently.
"......"
Celestia stared for a few seconds in total surprise. I will treasure the sight of her being floored forever and ever and ever.
"But we couldn't get the suit so it'll be a disaster and then Canterlot will catch fire somehow and everyone will have to run out in the rain!" Sweetie said in a panic, flailing.
She... no, she wouldn't try to set her father up with Celestia, he's married.
It must be someone she knows from Ponyville, but I don't know enough Ponyvillians to tell.
Celestia's face softened and she nuzzled Sweetie gently. "You are a kind pony. But your father is already married, you know."
"Not FATHER," Sweetie said.
"So you lied about who the suit was for," I said, frowning, though I had already been sure something was going on there.
She cringed. "It's a secret!"
"Well, I do like surprises," Celestia said kindly. "But you shouldn't sneak out of the castle without telling anyone. Ditzy feels very guilty she lost track of you."
"I'm sorry," Sweetie said sadly.
"Now tell me all about your big adventure," Celestia said, and Sweetie told us about it the rest of the way to dinner.
**********
I got a letter from Helga at dinner. It was a warning that all the Thyatian embassies seem to have put out the notice in the various capitals. That was both a worry (that's a big manhunt) and a relief (they do not know I am HERE.)
Dinner was quite nice; we didn't get to eat at the high table; a bunch of ambassadors were crammed around it. Dona Carlotta joined us, sitting by Twilight and chatting with everyone. The food was Sindhi tonight, which meant very spicy. Fine by me, but Applejack wasn't too happy with it, nor was Apple Bloom. Too 'frou-frou' for them, I guess.
Pinkie ate too much and got nauseous, most of us enjoyed it. Especially Spike. He wolfed it down like crazy.
The Sindhi Ambassador had a group of dancers come and perform as entertainment. Very well done, though scantily clad women were basically wasted on the ponies present. I tried not to stare too much.
I could hear some sort of argument at Celestia and Luna's table. I think Celestia was telling the Thyatian Ambassador not to do that again. He didn't look too happy.
Then I realized the Thyatian Ambassador from the Shires, Lord Caine, was there. I rubbed my forehead. It could be a coincidence, but... dammit.
Also, Duke Blueblood was smirking all night for some reason and the urge to punch his fat face was strong, very strong, but I fought it off.
"Marcus," Twilight said urgently.
I jumped, nearly dropping a forkful of curried rice and vegetables on myself. "I'm sorry, what?"
"Would you like to come stargaze with us after our appointment with Luna?" Twilight said. "I want to go get some things from my tower and I thought we could use my fancy telescope there. You too, Rarity."
"I'd love to; I'm curious to see your old place, Twilight," Rarity said.
"Sure," I said. It's seriously plush, really. I just have to remember to pretend I have NEVER seen it.
"This will be lots of fun," Twilight said happily.
As long as I don't give the game away and die.
***********
There is a large reflecting pool on the castle grounds in a nice garden; we met Luna there after moonrise. The orchestra came and began to play eerie music; Lyra played very well, but she and Octavia kept glancing uncomfortably at each other.
Moondancer now began to dance on the water and Luna joined her, both of them moving together to the beat, which made me tap my toes and everyone else to tap their feet or hooves.
We couldn't stop Scootaloo running out and joining them, and Luna smiled and welcomed her in.
I watched them work; I could feel them spinning threads of magical energy and working it into the water, which began to shine and to ripple. The water changed and now instead of showing the moon and stars, it showed a strange sight. You could see a swamp, through which trolls and various swamp creatures roamed, but it was not the Malpheggi. In the background, a cliff rose hundreds of feet and above that, mighty peaks soared high into the sky.
"I know that," I said. "That's in the Broken Lands, west of the west road. If you keep going west, maybe ten miles further was this ancient ruined tower that Ivan, Helga, and I tried to get into one time."
"What kept you out?" Pinkie asked.
"None of us were a good enough wizard to defeat the wards," I said. "But I happen to know a really good wizard now."
"Wh...oh, ME," Twilight said and everyone laughed.
"Humility is good for you," Ivan said, amused.
"What's in it?" Rarity asked.
"Gold, gems, jewels, ancient Blackmoorian devices, the works. It was built in Blackmoorian times," I said.
The view now zoomed in on the cliff face; you could see a huge crevice opening inwards with buildings inside it. A black dragon took flight down to the swamp as we watched.
We couldn't get closer, unfortunately, though the view moved around to establish its position clearly.
"Okay, this gives us something to work with, even if we can't be sure that the enemy forces are there," Twilight said. "Thank you very much, Princess Luna."
"How far away is this place?" Applejack asked.
"It's about two weeks ride from Fort Marny," I said. We can take the train as far as Fort Marny. Maybe longer if they've really extended it to Darokin City like I've heard rumors about.
"Urgh, that's a long trip," Applejack said.
"Most of it is pretty safe, though," I said. "If we took Twilight's balloon to Corunglain, it would be fairly safe and much faster, I'm sure. Then we'd just have to walk across the Broken Lands."
"I can't teleport that far," Twilight said, frowning. "But yes, we could balloon to Corunglain in a long day of travel, then rest a day and then head into the Broken Lands. It wouldn't be safe to balloon in the Broken Lands, but that would mean a shorter trip."
"Well, if we take the balloon, the kids can't risk themselves trying to follow us," Fluttershy pointed out.
"We saved you," Apple Bloom said. "We're ready for another adventure!"
"You're fillies and we have to protect you," Fluttershy said. "I am glad you want to help but we can't put you in danger."
"You're going into danger," Twist pointed out.
"Yes, but we're adults and chosen by destiny," Twilight said. "One day, you'll be old enough to go on adventures with us, but not yet."
"I can even use my tail now!" Apple Bloom protested.
I think Luna scried some other things but we all got distracted, arguing with the CMC.
Finally, Bon-Bon snapped, "Pay attention," at us and to our embarrassment, we all turned back.
Luna had zoomed in on a set of stairs which scaled the cliff face to the lair. And then there was sudden fuzzing and the water returned to showing the moon.
"I think she was about to notice," Luna said. "So I dropped it."
"Thank you very much," Twilight said. "I'm going to want to develop a defense against scrying so we can sneak up undetected, and then we'll be ready to go. This may take a day or two to study my options and learn one."
"Better to be ready than to go off half-ready," Luna said sagely. The three on the water were still dancing, though she now led them off the water.
The musicians now wrapped up and Luna went to thank the orchestra and let them go; Bon-Bon and Octavia were glaring at each other, but they just simmered instead of exploding, while Lyra looked guilty.
We spent some time planning our trip and trip preparations, then split up for the rest of the night.
***************
I accompanied Rarity, Spike, Twilight, Dona Carlotta, Sweetie, and Twist to Twilight's tower. The kids were very impressed by it; it is beautiful. I slept on the floor here many times.
Spike gave us a tour and was quite proud of showing everything off; the giant hourglass was still here, I noticed. I nearly asked if she ever figured out how it worked; it was a magic item she'd been studying. Then I remembered not to know that.
As we headed to the observation deck, I thought I saw something in the hourglass, but when I turned and looked, it wasn't there.
Probably just my nerves.
"What happens when it runs out of sand?" Sweetie Belle asked, pointing to it.
"It turns over and starts over," Twilight said. "I never did figure out the rest of its powers. It's magical."
"Oooh," Sweetie said, then started studying it. Then she suddenly jumped in the air.
"Do you see something?" I asked Sweetie.
"I thought I saw a red dragon looking at me," Sweetie said hesitantly.
"I thought so too for a second, but it vanished and I assumed it was my nerves," I said.
Twilight's eyes widened. "That can't bode well. Spike, send a letter to Celestia, just in case."
We all stared at it intently; I could feel flows of magic going all over the place from it, and I could feel Rarity and Twilight and even Sweetie's power. I felt (and saw) Dona Carlotta cast a spell and I could feel her reaching into it with magic.
Unicorns must feel this all the time.
"Is it just me, or is there... a sheath?" I said. Trying to feel inside it caused you to be repelled off the surface of it.
Not that I really know what I'm doing.
Sweetie got out her cards and began shuffling. I blinked in surprise.
Twilight said, "You are completely right, Marcus, and that's why I never solved this thing."
I'd taken a look at it before, but I hadn't even noticed the sheath then. "Rarity, maybe you can find a weak point?"
Rarity frowned and looked strained as she felt out the item. "Here, at the neck," she said, the point where it narrowed between the bells.
Sweetie now pulled a book out of her pack and did a lay out of seven cards and began studying it. Card divination. Not a bad idea if you have the magic to make it work.
Twilight said, "That's just superstition, Sweetie." She was clearly disapproving.
"But if it's backed by real magic, not just shuffling cards and hoping the universe gives you a clue, it might work, right?" I told Twilight.
"This book is all about card magic and it's REAL," Sweetie said stubbornly. "I don't tell you your stars are imaginary."
"I can look in the sky and see the stars," Twilight said, though now she looked curiously at the book. "Where did this come from?"
"Celestia's library," Sweetie said. "Apple Bloom found it for me."
"I hope she checked it out properly," Twilight said. "Celestia is our friend but her library is not just to be taken when you want to."
"I think we kind of interrupted them before they could," I told Twilight. "We can run by after this." I kneeled down by Sweetie. "I know about card divination, though I could never make it actually work except as... entertainment." I was about to say 'a con'. AHAHA.
"Look at how good I shuffle," Sweetie said proudly as the cards nimbly danced into new configurations.
"You are good," Twilight said. "But it should be 'how well I shuffle'."
Rarity had been about to speak but now she just smiled.
Dona Carlotta sat down by Sweetie to watch. "Erik loved card tricks," she said cheerfully. I'm glad she can remember me fondly and I REALLY WISH she had NOT SAID THAT.
"Well, he has one good trait at least," I said.
She frowned at me. "He was a good man. Not perfect, but a good man. You shouldn't speak ill of someone you've never met, Marcus."
Do not laugh. DO NOT LAUGH.
Twilight frowned. "Exactly. We knew him as he really was. Not these stupid lies."
My conscience broke a chair over my head. It sounded disturbingly like Celestia while doing so. AAAARRRRGGGHHH.
"Anyway, I don't care if he was good or bad," Sweetie said. "Okay, let's see. Spirit of the cards, spirit of fortune, show me the FUTURE!" She concentrated and the deck rose, wobbling, into the air. It spun in place and...
The hourglass suddenly drew a huge pile of power from all over. All of us except Spike and Sweetie wobbled and Spike said, "I really don't like what is going on!"
Sweetie's eyes now began to glow blue like the ocean. CRAP.
I instinctively grabbed onto her, trying to shield her with my own body, not that this was likely to do anything and I could just feel the magic flow around me and into the cards, which fluttered in a storm around us.
I could feel Celestia and Luna, they were coming.
Dona Carlotta shouted something and I could feel Twilight hurling power around and Rarity yelled something about time and Spike was making odd noises like he was on fire or something. And for some weird reason, I could feel power churning through my ass.
And then there was only blue and the Jack of Stones.
*************
WTF IS GOING ON VISION:
Everything had begun to go wrong when the Elements of Harmony never returned from the Broken Lands. Major Keen Eyes, father of Rarity and Sweetie, stood with his unit near Mareis, preparing for battle. His long pink mane was largely hidden under his helmet, but you could see his white coat despite his barding and quiver. His cutie mark, arrows overlapping to form a wall, was well hidden by his golden armor, enchanted with protection spells, thanks to his rank. Sind's attack had been aided by shapeshifters; long the bane of Sind, they had taken over covertly and then used their power to infiltrate and destroy Fort Overlook, Fort Mont-Mare and Fort Boatmurdered, though apparently the force which seized Boatmurdered had somehow unleashed an ancient evil on itself and been destroyed.
This still left two armies pushing into Equestria and he'd been called off the northeastern frontier to help fight against it. The initial strike of the shifters had killed most of the top command, which is how Duke Blueblood of all people had ended up in command of this army; from what little Major Keen Eyes knew of the man, this boded ill, as Blueblood was basically a stuck up, egotistical noble with no experience. But he'd raised a force of several thousand militia to add to the army, so at least he'd come bearing gifts.
Keen Eyes was surprised to be called to the tent of Duke Blueblood. Keen Eyes commanded an entire thousand pony strong regiment of warponies, not an inconsiderable force, having been promoted from being captain of a company due to the death of so much of the high command. The best of the lance (ten pony squad) commanders under him now had his old job. The Duke, though, was notoriously snobby and usually only spoke with the Colonels who commanded the brigades (three regiments strong) and the Generals who commanded the divisions (ten regiments strong).
He entered and saluted. Duke Blueblood looked exhausted and worn as he studied the map; ponies scurried about the command tent and to Major Keen Eyes's surprise, there was a human woman, tall with long blonde hair tied into a braid; she wore black Alphatian style robes with many white winds embroidered on them and she looked like she hated everyone for existing.
But her gaze softened a little on seeing him. Duke Blueblood didn't even notice, though he now stuck his head in a huge bowl of what Keen Eyes hoped was NOT alcohol. It smelled like apples, which could go either way.
Also, drinking with your head in the bowl was crude, especially as it had several bendy straws in it already.
They'd had a hard time getting Sweetie to stop doing that, but Blueblood was a grown Pony, for goodness' sake.
"He's here," the woman said softly.
Duke Blueblood looked up with haunted eyes. Then Keen Eyes felt a surge of magic and Blueblood's lips dried off. "Major Keen Eyes, I am very glad to see you," he said, though he actually sounded half-dead. But sober. More exhausted than anything else. "I have good news I want you to spread to your men. And a mission for you."
Given the rumors about the size of the Sindhi army, they could USE good news. "Yes, sir," he said.
"This is Lady Helga from Glantri. She has persuaded some of her kin to give us assistance at cost to herself. It's... a long story but in short, we have to buy two days for the elementals to be summoned and brought here. I don't know if even that will be enough, but it will certainly make things better." He was talking to the bottom of Keen Eyes' neck, unable to raise his head. "We will have two dozen Glantrian wind elementalists and several hundred air elementals. Given the great weakness of our foes' air force, I think this could be of great help."
"And you want me to lead an attack to slow them down," Keen Eyes said. He knew his daughter had had trouble at the Grand Galloping Gala but he hadn't thought the man would stoop to this depth for revenge, especially with her missing and presumed dead.
"No," Blueblood said. "I need you to take an important message to Celestia. We can't risk magical interception. If you take the train, you can be back before the big battle. And I can circulate that you asked me for a chance to see your wife before the big battle." She was in Canterlot with Sweetie. "That way the enemy won't expect you to be carrying a message."
"The other officers will not think well of me, running off on the brink of battle, family or not," Major Keen Eyes said, frowning. "That being said, if you order me, I will go, as is my duty."
"I told you," Helga said to Duke Blueblood, who now took a long draught of drink through a straw.
Duke Blueblood looked vaguely stunned. "You might never see them again if you don't go now, you know."
Major Keen Eyes shuffled a little nervously on his feet. He suddenly had a feeling there was more to this than he had expected. There was some intrigue afoot here. Given that he, a Major, was being given a corporal or maybe a sergeant's job here...
"What's going on?" he said softly.
"Someone who *resembles* your daughter is with the enemy army," Helga said.
"You weren't supposed to tell him that!" Blueblood protested. "How's he supposed to go on knowing his daughter is with the enemy?"
Major Keen Eyes stared, eyes wide. "What?"
"It's probably a shapeshifter, not your daughter," Helga said. "Or some kind of clone. Though she is good at archery."
"And was cackling about the plunder from Fort Mont-Mare," Blueblood said to the map.
"Anyway, there's no conclusive proof," Helga said, "That it is really her and not a fake. We have had reports from Celestia that the enemy may be able to make clones of anyone they capture, AND they have actual shapeshifters. So we can't be sure it's her for real."
"And you thought I could not do my duty in that situation," Major Keen Eyes said stiffly, though he felt horrified by the idea of even shooting at a person pretending to be Rarity, who he was very worried about but not the type to actually tell anyone that.
"How can I ask a father to shoot at his own child?" Blueblood said, clearly stunned and horrified by the idea.
Major Keen Eyes relaxed just a little. "It must be a shapeshifter or a double. Rarity would never betray Equestria. I can go if you really need me to take a message, but I would rather deal with this impostor myself."
Duke Blueblood licked his lips nervously. "So be it," he said softly. "I am very sorry."
"This is not your fault, sir," Major Keen Eyes told Blueblood. The thought of shooting at someone who resembled Rarity horrified him but he did not show it. Someone had to be strong if Blueblood would not. "I will ensure she is dealt with." Much as it would hurt.
Blueblood hung his head. "I cannot ask you to do it."
"I volunteer," he said. "Post us as necessary. We will ensure it is done." His gut wrenched, but he ignored it. He would do his duty, though the very thought of it ached. But a soldier could not show weakness and fear. He despised those who did. His daughter was strong, and she responded to adversity with strength. He was proud of her accomplishments. And he would deal with this evil clone, without letting it know it hurt him even to think about it.
A man does what a man has to do.
And the world turned blue.
************
There was shouting and screaming. I could hear Celestia now and something about hourglasses. Sweetie was crying and I held on tight to her, trying to cut the threads of magic which were flowing through us, but I just shoved them around and the blue changed and now the Jack of Flames flickered past us.
*************
WTF IS GOING ON VISION:
Five pale skinned female elves with unusually large ears looked around nervously. One of them wore a golden necklace with large gems strung on it; they glowed with an eerie ever changing blue fire; she carried a long staff in her hands with another such gem set into one end. Her hair was long and red. There was a second elf with curly red hair, one with pink and purple hair, a fourth with blonde hair and a fifth with pinkish-purple hair and darker skin. The first, second and the fifth wore suits of chainmail, the third and fourth, multi-colored robes.
"Okay, Sweetie, get us in," the first said.
The pink and purple haired female elf waved her hands over the huge complicated lock mechanisms. One by one, tumblers turned and bolts slid. Spells unwove and unraveled and the defenses shut down. "Hah, just like big sister," Sweetie-Elf said proudly.
And then the doors swung open. What stood before them was the holiest of holies in the City of the Stars, the great city of the Shadow Elves (who despite their names were albino, like the bodies which the Cutie Mark Crusaders had taken on, thanks to a potion). They were all technically upside down, for in some mysterious way, gravity was different in the great cavern and the city sat on the ceiling of the cavern.
You easily forgot, like right now, down under the main temple. Now before them stood a vast machine of crystal piping and adamantine and mithril and glass, full of glittering gems like the ones Apple Bloom wore.
"We are so dead if they catch us," Twist said, looking around.
"I'm not worried about them. We bluffed them easily," Scootaloo said. "I'm worried about dying of boredom watching you all work." Her powers were great... and in this body she couldn't fly and she didn't have the mechanical skills to do much even if she did have hands at the moment. But this was Apple Bloom's turn to shine.
YOU HAVE BIGGER WORRIES THAN DYING OF BOREDOM, the voice said, echoing through the room but coming from nowhere in particular.
"Oh shit," Scootaloo said.
A human hand the size of an elephant appeared. DID YOU THINK I WOULD LEAVE MY GRAND EXPERIMENT UNMONITORED? IT IS TIME FOR A LESSON IN STAYING OUT OF OTHER PEOPLE'S...
He did not finish because Twist produced two huge licorice whips, snagged two of his fingers and tossed him into the ceiling. "Apple Bloom, you shut it down, we'll keep him busy!"
GUARDS! THE INNER SANCTUM HAS BEEN VIOLATED!
"Yes, the more who come, the more beatings I get to dish out!" Scootaloo shouted and assumed Pony form. She was a full blown adult now with large, powerful wings and a muscular physique. "It's time to kick some flank!"
YOU ARE ALL CRAZY, the voice said in disbelief.
"IMMORTALITY MARK CRUSADERS FOREVER!" Dinky shouted and then mist filled the room.
And then there was blue light everywhere.
**************
More shouting, more chaos, lights flashing and cards flying. But the level had dimmed down as Sweetie had stopped crying and now actually looked intrigued. I guess I stuck around in that future. In fact, that felt like the kind of thing Ivan and Helga and I got into all the time.
"Sweetie, you have to take control of this, or it'll keep flipping us through possible futures," I told her.
"I don't know how, I'm just a filly, I can't control big magic!" she said, starting to panic.
"You started this, it has to be you," I told her. "I won't abandon you, but I can't control this." My previous poking showed me that.
"SWEETIE!" I heard Rarity's panicked voice. "Hold on!"
"I can't," she cried.
"You can do it," I told her. "I'll help you but it has to be you who takes control of what you set in motion," I said to her.
She reached out with her will and seized a card. It was the Jack of Waves and now the world turned blue again.
*************
WTF IS GOING ON VISION:
I was me this time, but I was along for the ride inside me, if you know what I mean.
I was riding on Rarity, who was (I don't know how) now big enough to carry me comfortably; she wore armor made of glittering crystal and I was wearing enchanted cloth armor (so it wouldn't get in the way of spell casting). The sky was black with dark clouds and dragons were battling other dragons and Pegasi overhead in a huge melee. I could see Rainbow Dash and the Wonderbolts charging a formation of green dragons.
We stood among a force of archer warponies, who were providing supporting fire for an army of humans, ill clad in hunting leathers and thick furs, armed with spear and shortbow and absolute determination. A handful of Unicorns, among them a similarly oversized Twilight, provided magical support fire. Ivan rode on a horse, hammer in his hand, devastating the ranks of the enemy and leading the peasants, and now I understood why Keraptis gave him Whelm of all things.
For our foes were just what Whelm was intended to fight: a handful of giants, several squads of ogres and hordes of orcs, goblins, bugbears, and humans in black armor with a golden shield with an eagle spreading his wings in black as their symbol. They were trained professionals and they hammered the peasant army hard.
We fell back down the valley between two wooded ridges, fighting hard and giving ground. Rarity shot down one of the giants with a series of precise shots and I hurled fire and lightning, though Twilight and her force did more damage than I.
That's when maniacal laughter rolled across the battlefield.
Distantly, I heard the Black Eagle Baron, the tyrant of western Karameikos, who had somehow escaped Stefan's justice for decades, shouting something, and there was a huge discharge of lightning from Bargle, his evil wizard vizier.
But a yellow pegasus appeared, clad in robes, and blocked it with her staff. She was laughing like a maniac. And then there was MORE laughter from the other ridge.
And then the trees stood up and charged down the ridges at the Black Eagle's forces as two nearly identical yellow Pegasi shouted about being loved forever.
A horde of Dogboyz from Manehattan and other ports now charged out of hiding and sealed the other end of the valley, with two carrying Apple Blossom on a litter. She held up a glass, sipped from it, then said, "Time to collect, boyz! Show them how we do it in Manehattan!"
OH YEAH.
And then there was blue light everywhere.
**************
I took Sweetie's hooves with my hands. "We can do it together," I told her. Or so I hope. She was crying but one by one, they started to settle. I twined my power with hers, let her use my strength. But some of them fluttered up. For moments, we saw other futures. Where Sweetie was a warpony. Where I was King of Karameikos. Where Rarity was a strange crystalline goddess made of gems. Where Celestia... was kissing Big Macintosh? He looked as stunned as I felt.
But card by card, she pushed them down and forced her will on them. "Sing," I told her, and she began to sing about cards. It was a rather better song than I would have expected to be improvised so hastily.
Another blue flash and now we went to dance with the Jack of Winds.
*************
HOURGLASS WEIRDNESS VISION:
Ivan clinked his glass with Applejack, Apple Blossom, Rarity, Clarity, Marcus, Spike, and Spikey. Pinkamena (in a human form) was up on the stage, parading with the other models to show off this fall's line of fashions, the MUST HAVE items without which every noble had to consider himself ill dressed. Dozens of nobles and those aspiring to such were all crowded into the room, studying everything intently and laying their plans to look better than their rivals for the next year.
"Thank you, everyone," Ivan said. "I couldn't have done it without you."
"I can't believe they're so crazy for clothing," Applejack said. She was the only person present not wearing a fancy outfit, though she did have a platinum pendant of an apple on, in addition to her saddlebags, boots, and hat.
"Nobles crave status. Status costs money. Intensify status competition and they will bankrupt themselves trying to one-up each other," Apple Blossom said. "Elegance is important, but you have to be sure you stay within your means. They'll all borrow money from Spike and Spikey to finance their purchases, so we get a cut that way too."
Spike and Spikey high-fived and Ivan laughed. "I have come to see why Asterius has both trade and theft in his portfolio," Ivan said, grinning.
"Well, it's been a ton of fun, darling. I can't think of a better way to stage a revolution than this," Rarity said, then sipped her orange martini. "I get to do what I love best, help a friend and work towards freeing a nation."
"Amen to that," Marcus said, patting Rarity's shoulder. She smiled brightly as Sweetie continued to sing in the background. "It doesn't get better than this."
And the world turned blue.
*************
Why had I been IVAN instead of ME in that???
I suddenly wondered if that future me was someone else. I suppose he could have been Sammy but Sammy is with Twilight.
Which if he could...aaargh, this is not the time to think about Twilight that way.
Now the cards danced to her tune. They settled into place and the hourglass now reversed and the sand began to pour and the world turned blue one last time. The Jack of Shadows flickered past.
*************
DEFINITELY IMPOSED BY THE HOURGLASS VISION:
We were in some sort of Northman style mead hall; a vast feast was spread out before us, but no one was here. It was odd, though; one side of the table was full of human foods, the other side laden with foods for ponies. Sweetie stood by my side, and stared, drooling, at the pony side.
"Don't, it's a trap," I told her. I was in control of me, though. Not along for the ride. What is going on now?
"But it..."
"TRAP," I said firmly. "Don't touch anything, eat anything, I'd tell you not to even look, but we'd probably walk into a pit if we went blind," I told her. I could feel everything was laden with magic.
A pony came out of the shadows. She was a unicorn mare, red coated with a multi-colored mane, just like Celestia's. Her cutie mark was a golden goblet filled with a bubbling red liquid. "Hello, my little ponies," she said with a kindly voice.
"Are you Marjorie in disguise?" Sweetie asked.
Good thinking. I don't think so, but wise of you to ask.
The pony laughed. "I am Cunning Thought, and I cannot claim Marjorie among my children, though I am proud of her for showing some wit for once. Normally, her solution to everything is either to bite it or to jump out from ambush and bite it by surprise. Why she was chosen for her office, I do not understand. But I guess everyone grows up eventually." She sounded vastly amused. Indeed, it reminded me of Celestia.
"Are you Celestia's mother?" Sweetie asked.
"Yes," Cunning Thought said.
FUCK, IT IS LOKI.
"Get behind me now," I told Sweetie, despite knowing it was hopeless and hoping the hourglass would yank us back quickly.
"Now, now, do you really think I would hurt a child?" Cunning Thought said mournfully.
"I know what Hule is like, Father of Lies," I said harshly.
"Now, now, 'Marcus', you hardly have any place to call someone Father of Lies. Especially when I am in a female body," Cunning Thought said, clearly amused rather than angry.
I do not think I have ever been more fucked than this or if I have, I don't know why I still exist or don't remember it.
FUCK ME.
"I can see why Celestia wants you, though. I give you two my blessing. Though I advise you to alternate taking each other's form. Centaur children have all the problems of foals AND of human children." Her voice was playful, and... I can't believe I was actually GLAD she got off the topic of my identity. She stepped closer and I backed up, gently pushing Sweetie back as she peeked around my legs.
"I'm not looking to create centaurs!" I said fervently.
"Well, Celestia can easily ensure either of you become whatever you like, pony, human, elf, Oard..."
Sweetie's eyes opened wide. "Wait, I thought Ditzy and Dinky just hallucinated those things!"
"He's...," I began.
"SHE," Cunning Thought said. "Don't make me call *you* 'she', 'Marcus'." Don't ask me how I could hear the quote marks. I KNEW they were there. It's all about the tone of gently mocking doubt.
"Don't turn Marcus into a woman! Rarity wouldn't be happy at all!" Sweetie said urgently.
"She is just messing with you, Sweetie," I said.
"There's one in Ponyville," Cunning Thought said.
Now Sweetie looked really worried. "Who?"
"Well, now, secrets aren't kept or revealed for free," Cunning Thought said. "I know quite a bit, but as they say, measure for measure. The worker is worthy of his hire."
Damn you, I thought. I am not so easily played, but Sweetie is like a violin.
"I have a little money," Sweetie said, looking in her saddlebags.
"Sweetie, you can't just trust every adult pony that comes along," I told her. "She's trying to trick you."
"But she's Celestia's mother," Sweetie said, confused. "She wouldn't lie to us."
"I love my daughter very much and I'm proud of what she's accomplished," Cunning Thought said warmly. "She loves all her little ponies and they love her, just like my people love me and the freedom I bring them."
That's one way of looking at it.
Not a very HONEST way, but a way.
"The people of Hule...," I began.
"Love me and worship me by their own choice. Chaos is in their souls," Cunning Thought said. "Like it is in yours. Don't you love the freedom of the open road with nothing to tie you down?"
"Yes, but I don't go causing trouble for other people," I said. This could be the most foolish thing I ever said.
Cunning Thought fell down laughing, rolled against the feast table and a chicken leg fell on her face.
"I don't get the joke," Sweetie said. "Does this mean you need a cutie mark to get it?"
"I don't like to hurt people and YOU DO," I told her. "I know how many people you've lied to and betrayed!"
Cunning Thought tried to stand, fell down again and now collapsed the entire table on herself, but she kept laughing.
Sweetie rushed forwards to help her and I, reluctantly, joined her. We pulled the table and the food off her; the food turned to spoiled food and rot as we tossed it aside and Sweetie stared.
"I have not had that good a laugh in a long time," Cunning Thought said. "You are so full of irony, I am surprised you are strong enough to move your own feet."
"I still don't get it," Sweetie said.
Good. "Whatever you have in mind, we will not fall for it," I said. "Sweetie, I don't know how Cunning Thought hijacked your spell, but you have to tell it to end."
"Now, now, Sweetie is not the only shaper of this spell," Cunning Thought said. "This is not the first time you've danced with the Jack of Shadows and I doubt it will be your last. Look me in the eye and tell me you don't prefer to defeat your foes with cunning and wit and sometimes deceptions." Her voice was very serious now. "To turn them against each other and pull the wool over their eyes."
"It's better than violence," I said softly. "But if you lie to everyone, then no one can trust you. Or at least they'd be wiser not to."
"Marcus never lies to me," Sweetie said firmly, flicking the last bit of gunk off Cunning Thought. "He trusts me and I trust him."
"Everyone lies, even the best of us, Sweetie, and that's no lie," Cunning Thought said sadly, rising.
Damn you. It's true, but it's not... she's just a child. Better to remove the blinders slowly so the light doesn't blind.
"You should visit your daughter some time," Sweetie said and pony-hugged her leg.
She blinked at Sweetie, then looked at me with a look of 'AHAHAHAHA'. Then she smiled sweetly at Sweetie. "Thank you for helping me, Sweetie. Hold on, I have a present for you." She cantered back into the shadows.
"Sweetie, we have to go," I said. "Her presents are dangerous!"
"But... she's Celestia's mother! She can't be evil!" Sweetie said.
Bloody hell, how do I explain all this to a child? "Please, trust me," I told her. "You have to end this."
She hesitated, then said, "Okay, Marcus." She sounded reluctant, and I gave a sigh of relief. She concentrated and the world turned blue
"I couldn't have brought you here if you hadn't already tied yourself to Chaos!," Cunning Thought shouted. "And say hello to Father Time for me!"
Then we saw the Jack of Waves. And we were gone.
**********
STILL NOT REALITY, DAMMIT:
Father Time was a grey-coated, white maned old stallion wearing a crown and sitting on a throne in a way most Ponies can't manage. He looked rather uncomfortable. He had a golden hourglass as his Cutie Mark, which made Sweetie gasp. "Are you Ditzy's boyfriend's father?"
He blinked. "Shouldn't you be dead?" he said to me.
Thanks, Father Time. Thanks A LOT. I bowed anyway. "I am Samus Marcus of Thyatis and this is my friend, Sweetie Belle. I believe we triggered something that belongs to you. My apologies. If you can tell us how to stop, we will happily leave you to your work."
There was another throne with another pony; this one sat more comfortably like a human, despite pony form. She was raven maned and chestnut coated with bright brown eyes. Laurel crowned her head and her cutie mark was a white egg with a crimson serpent twined around it. "There are no accidents in time, as my dear love would say. I am Mother Nature, who your friend Fluttershy serves."
Also known as Djaea, she is the patron of all druids. She can be both benevolent or malevolent, as the whim takes her, though she is Neutral, rather than Chaotic. There are patterns to her deeds if you have the wisdom to look for them.
"You must be really super-nice then," Sweetie said, bowing to her and Father Time. I did the same.
"You are a sweet child. This door was meant for another, but I am pleased you came through it," Mother Nature said.
Father Time studied me, then his eyes widened slightly. "What on Mystara ARE you?" Father Time said to me.
Thanks, Father Time. Thanks a lot.
"He's Samus Marcus and he's... very important to Rarity and me." She looked at me hesitantly.
"I am Celestia and Luna's special agent, marked by them and sworn to them," I said, flourishing my hat. "And Rarity and Sweetie are indeed important to me as well."
Sweetie looked relieved.
Father Time and Mother Nature studied each other, communing silently. "I see what happened," Father Time said now. "Tell Celestia..."
"Oh, and Cunning Thought said to say hi to you!" Sweetie said. "She's Celestia's mother! You probably don't know her."
His eyes flickered in a way that made me VERY nervous. But then he said, "I will remember that." His voice was grave. "You are human, yes?"
"In this life," I told him. "Apparently, I have reincarnated a lot, and I don't remember most of it." I frowned at that.
"Are you relatives of Princess Celestia?" Sweetie asked.
"We are Immortals; we were once mortal like you, but by long effort, we came to take our current place among them," Father Time said kindly to her. "Anyone might aspire to join us one day, though few, very few will do so."
"Ooooo," Sweetie said, a light in her eyes.
Oh bloody hell.
"Tell Fluttershy I am very proud of her," Mother Nature said. "And to keep up the good work."
"I will."
"And I ask her to save Dragonfly's life if she can," Mother Nature continued.
"I intend to ensure they all survive if I can," I told her. "They have been played for puppets and fools and I..." I grimaced. "Have been that too." I stared at the ground, frustrated. I don't even know for sure what all Bastet hoped to accomplish, whether she had any real interest in success or if I was just an experiment.
I felt a degree of anger over how Marjorie was using them that surprised me. I try to avoid passion. It only gets you in trouble. Unless its fear, and then it sometimes... sometimes gets you out. But I don't LIKE fear. I am so afraid and I hate it.
"I want to help my other sister even if I don't understand how there are two Rarities," Sweetie said.
"I cannot see how it will end," Father Time said, studying me and Sweetie.
"That just makes it more interesting, dear," Mother Nature said, laughing.
"Tell Celestia we will be here when the Hourglass is activated CORRECTLY," Father Time said. "And to please try to avoid more accidental activations."
"I'm really sorry!" Sweetie said urgently. "Can you tell us why we saw a red dragon in it?"
"That is the enemy you soon must face," Father Time said, getting off his throne and onto all fours. He raised a hoof. "She waits in the Broken Lands," he continued. "But you knew that already. And you have seen what will happen if you lose."
"Or if you win," Mother Nature said.
"I like that one MUCH better," Sweetie said.
Me too. Even if it looks like you were about to... what the hell was that giant hand???
I know little of the Shadowelves, but I have never heard they worship a giant hand with a huge echo-y voice.
This world is weird sometimes.
"Can you tell me what my Cutie Mark will be?" Sweetie asked.
"It depends on the future you choose," Father Time said.
"And the company you keep," Mother Nature said. "It will come sooner than you think."
Way to be totally vague, guys. Way.
Then Father Time waved his hoof and reality came back.
******************
The entire deck was spread out around us and I was still holding onto Sweetie protectively, when reality came back. Celestia and Luna were here now. EVERYONE was here now, including a lance of Warponies.
Ack.
"I am so sorry, please don't turn me into a duck!" Sweetie said desperately.
"That's Twilight's job, random transformations," Celestia said cheerfully, then nuzzled Sweetie, while Luna looked stern. "You should feel proud of yourself, you got this little device to work," Celestia said.
"Father Time told me not to play with it any more and that he's waiting for it to be activated right," Sweetie said. "I'm sorry, I just wanted to help."
"You did," I told her.
Even the CMC are here, along with Ditzy, Lyra, and Bon-Bon. How long were we... doing whatever that was exactly?
"We saw a bunch of futures, including what happens if we succeed and what if we fail." I licked my lips. "I don't know how, but if we fail, she takes over Sind somehow and they invade. Led by the Elements of Power."
"And if you succeed?" Luna asked.
"WE BECOME TOTALLY AWESOME," Sweetie said. "Beating up evil giant hands and breaking their machines!"
"We're good at breaking things!" Apple Bloom said.
"Evil giant hands?" Luna said, confused.
"LOOK!" Scootaloo said, pointing at me. No wait, not me, SWEETIE.
Sweetie had a spread of five cards on her flanks, but you couldn't see which cards. Instead, you saw the back of the cards. Each of which had a blue shield with a yellow pony rampant and in the upper right and lower left corner, a blue hourglass.
Sweetie looked at herself and her breath caught.
"YES!!!!!!" she shouted and hugged me and her friends and Celestia and basically started working on everyone in the universe, even the warponies.
"Dammit, I thought a library would be boring but she got a cool cutie mark!" Scootaloo said, aggravated.
"Don't worry," Apple Bloom said. "We'll get ours soon," she said. But she looked jealous.
"It was in the city of the Shadowelves, some sort of giant hand monster that could make echoey voices in your head," I said. "There were these sparkling blue gems with eerie light and a machine tapping them for something and..."
Celestia and Luna frowned in unison. "Oh really," Luna said. "We will go over this later."
When people not cleared for big secrets are not around.
"Did you see my friends?" Pinkie asked urgently.
"I saw Rarity's father and Prince Blueblood and Helga," I said. "I think I was sort of inside his head. And I saw a future where Pinkamena becomes a fashion model working for Rarity. Or maybe for Clarity. Or both."
"I was inside Helga," Sweetie said.
Ivan snickered. DAMMIT, IVAN.
Lyra had a hoof over her mouth. But she clearly wanted to laugh.
"Was he okay?" Rarity asked urgently.
"Your father was fine, but battle was immanent. We had all vanished, but Helga brought some of Blackhill's forces to Equestria's aid for reasons never explained," I said.
"She was angry that the bad people had... she thought they'd killed you," Sweetie said hesitantly.
I suddenly wondered how much she knew now. Aaaargh.
"And she knew you were a friend of Equestria, so she wanted to help save it, since you'd.... died fighting for it." Sweetie shivered. "You too, Ivan. You two were her best friends in the world besides her husband. She loves you both very much." Her voice was urgent.
"That's Helga," Ivan said, smiling. "She and Marcus and I were like the five of you, back in our younger days."
"Why'd she leave you?" Twist asked, worried.
"She fell in love and wanted to get married and Darien didn't want to wander the world. So she gave it up for him," I told Twist.
Lyra made mumbly noises.
He wouldn't go to Boasttown either, Lyra.
"I hope she's happy with that," Twist said. "I don't want to give up my friends ever."
Sooner or later, you do. Which sucks. "She's still a part of our lives," I told Twist. "Very few people are lucky enough to get to be with their friends forever. But it doesn't mean you stop being friends. But unless you all marry each other," I said, then regretted even beginning the sentence, "each of you will share at least some of your life with someone else." Unless they abandon you like Dinky's father did. Bastard. Or they're like me and all their love affairs end in FIRE.
Scootaloo stared at the floor and I wondered what she was thinking. "I'm NEVER getting married," she said.
"Oh, Dinky," Sweetie said urgently. "Celestia's mother said that Oards are real and there's one in Ponyville!"
FUCK ME.
Dinky and Ditzy both looked utterly panicked. "He's not... Tell me the Oard doesn't have an hourglass cutie mark," Ditzy squeaked out.
"She was trying to trick you to make trouble! It's how she IS," I told Sweetie. "Ditzy, Dinky, I am sure she was just trying to get you two in trouble," I said urgently.
"Mother was there?" Celestia said, frowning intensely.
"Does she have a cutie mark of a golden goblet with a bubbling red fluid in it?" I asked.
Ivan made a strangled noise. "That's her."
"You've met Celestia's mother?" I said in surprise.
"I know the signs of the Immortals. I can study seriously if it's IMPORTANT," Ivan said. "Sweetie, you can't trust anything that person said." His voice was urgent.
"My mother is not very nice, unfortunately," Celestia said sadly.
"Tell us everything she said," Luna said firmly.
I looked around and tried to subtly indicate the presence of people like the CMC and the warponies.
Luna let the warponies return to their stations and had Ditzy take the CMC, except for Sweetie, for a 'snack'. Then we told everyone what we'd seen. I was surprised they had Lyra and Bon-Bon stay but I left it to their judgment
"I don't understand what's wrong with your mother," Sweetie finally said.
"She is very mean and I am still trying to show her the error of her ways," Celestia said.
"It's a longterm project," Luna said.
"Well, maybe it's working," Sweetie said. "She was nice to me but Marcus said we had to run away so I made us run."
"Old Nervous Nellie time again," Applejack said, grinning a little.
"It was wise to flee," Luna said. Applejack blinked and I smiled a little. Thanks, boss.
Luna now nuzzled me gently as Celestia did the same with Sweetie. 'We have to ensure Father doesn't get his hooks into Sweetie and her friends.' Her voice echoed in my mind as she wove a spell to let us communicate privately.
'I know,' I told her, mind-to-mind. 'Just tell me what to do.'
'She trusts you very much,' Luna said thoughtfully.
'She is young and naive and trusts adults. And I am approved by her sister, who she idolizes. I just want to help her, but it would easy for someone to gain her trust and abuse it.' She's a nice kid. But like most kids... especially pony kids... she trusts too easily. 'Would Blueblood really get put in charge of an army like that?'
'Not as a first, second, or third choice, but if enough of the high command died, possibly yes. There are many who would follow his name still if the call for war came,' Luna said. 'It would be a sign of desperation, though.'
Seeing he has some decency sucks; it's hard to hate someone once you've seen their better side and for what he did to Rarity, I want to hate him without remorse.
Damn you, conscience.
'There is a light in every darkness and darkness in every light', Luna said to me. 'I did not understand that, once.' Her voice was freighted with sorrow. But then it lightened. 'I wish to be the one who finds that light and helps others to find it in themselves. That they may walk out of the darkness and into the light once more. There is darkness in all of us and sometimes it is a useful tool. But we must master it instead of it riding us. You and I, we have made mistakes. But we can fix them. You did well, my little human.' She smiled at that and I laughed softly.
'Thank you. I have a soft spot for children,' I told her. 'And Sweetie is very lovable' I paused. 'So you and Celestia hope to reform your fa... mother? Many have tried and failed, you know. It is dangerous even to try.'
'I know. But if Celestia had not believed in me, I would not be here now,' Luna said. 'Mother has fallen much farther, but we must try. For her good and ours. But that is a story for another day. For now, let's focus on Marjorie.'
I nodded to her. 'That's wise,' I told her. 'Are you going to stay for the star-gazing?'
'I think so, since I am here anyway,' Luna said and released me. "Well, we should call the kids back, so Twilight can teach them and us a lesson about the stars."
"I'm sure you know more than me," Twilight said modestly.
"I would like to hear it from you; I talk to myself all the time," Luna said. "Even if talking to yourself means you always have the best listener."
She and Pinkie laughed at that. The rest laughed a little. I'd heard the joke too many times.
The CMC soon returned and we headed to stargaze.
************
Sweetie and I got taken to Luna's office and she and Celestia went over what we'd seen in excruciating detail. Then Sweetie was sent to go to bed and I stayed.
"I think we may have to try to lure them out," I said. "Though I don't know how... those futures were contradictory, so I assume there is some way to get around us losing in the Broken Lands."
"We will spend time studying and preparing before rushing into anything," Celestia said. "Luna and I have agents who will gather more information."
"We can research things like more scrying magic and defenses to try and ensure we can get surprise on them," I said. "With my knowledge of dirty tricks and experience of this kind of evil maniac's fortresses, Twilight's knowledge of arcane theory and vast power, and Rarity's precision control of magic, I bet we could whip up some interesting spells of use for this."
"We had best not rush into things, though most of the futures, you did seem to succeed," Celestia said. "It would be better if we could set a trap of our own devising."
"I agree," Luna said.
I leaned back in my chair. "So what do you want me to do?"
"Work with Twilight and Rarity on magic," Luna said. "We will need to gather more intelligence, I think."
"Of course," I said. "They're fun to work with."
Celestia gave me the look which means I am about to be screwed with.
Dammit.
"Looking forward to a threesome?" she said cheerfully.
Luna buried her face in her hooves. "Celestia!"
"I don't think I'm enough of a stallion for you and Luna at the same time," I told her, trying to counter-strike.
Luna turned red. "Marcus!"
"Oh my, you do dream big," Celestia said. "I'm just teasing, dear," she said to Luna, then nuzzled her gently. "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You know I love you."
"I love you too, big sister," Luna said, now smiling brightly.
"Is there anything that needs to be done for Sweetie?" I asked. "I know sort of how cutie marks work, but I don't know if this means she's going to... well, humans have all sorts of issues during puberty."
"Yes," Celestia said. "There are health issues but Rarity will handle that. The biggest concern is to avoid too much friction between her and her two dear friends. They are likely to feel frustrated she got it before they did. So please help them to deal with it. And help Sweetie with her magical studies."
"Of course," I said. I was now reminded. "Did you turn my tattoo into a Cutie Mark?" I asked. "Or what?"
"You don't remember how you got it, right?" Luna said softly.
"I dimly remember winning a huge pile of money from dwarves who tried to cheat me. Then I blew it all on my friends and women and the usual idiocy. I think I got the tattoo but I don't remember being tattooed."
"Bastet put it on you, I think," Luna said. "It anchored you to the sword and the reincarnation. It also was, I think, an effort by her to produce something like a Cutie Mark, but it didn't work right."
"Producing chaos," I said. "Loki... said I was tied to Chaos."
"Yes," Luna said. "You still are. With time, though, you should gain control of it. I did my best to fix what she did."
"Am I... going to turn into a pony?" I asked. I would rather be human.
"No," Luna said. "Should you choose to take on a pony form temporarily, you will now be very hard to tell apart from one of us, but I know you prefer being human, and I will not force any sort of permanent change on you. That being said, you will likely sometimes find it advantageous or useful to take on a pony form, working for us. Also, if you end up having to reincarnate by the sword, we cannot control what happens. That is in the hands of Mother Nature. If you want, we can talk to Fluttershy tomorrow about recharging it, if she is willing. Celestia and I cannot do it."
"Because the Sphere of Matter handles reincarnation?" I asked.
"Yes," Luna said. "I leave the choice in your hands."
Celestia opened her mouth.
"The sword will eventually recharge. On the other hand, I know you are tired of turning into different people. But it could be very useful for an emergency," Luna said. "The choice is in your hands. You work for us, but you are a friend, not a slave. I want to leave you as much control over your life and destiny as I can within the limits of being our sworn man. Freedom is important to me," she said, her voice turning urgent on the last sentence.
"We prefer to guide more than command," Celestia said.
"I know, it's why I was willing to swear to you," I said softly. "And why Ivan likes you. But you know how it is with him."
"A little," Luna said. "Tell us more."
So I told them about Ivan and his hopes. Things I hadn't even known until this trip. I have to tell him about that one vision.
"I approve," Luna said, smiling. "Passion for the freedom of your people is a good thing. One day, I hope, all of Mystara will be free."
It's hard for me to dream like that. All my dreams end in fire. But I hope Ivan's dream comes true.
And that I haven't been killed yet when it happens.
************
Afterwards, I was going to head to bed, but Rainbow Dash found me and we ended up wandering into the gardens. "What's up, Dash?"
"Hey, you've, umm... dated a lot of people since, you're... really old, right?"
Ahahah.
"Yes," I told her. "I'm not so sure a lot of my past experience is a good guide except for 'things not to do'," I told her as we walked along.
"You and me both," she mumbled and I patted her head.
"Anyway, what's up?" I asked.
"I... umm... ahaha..." She started to become more agitated.
I blinked. "What?"
"I... see... umm... Is it... ahahah..." Rainbow Dash was practically vibrating.
"You having some kind of problem with Soarin'?" I asked.
"Not a problem. Just wondering...umm... I mean, I know you two... umm... aahahahahaha!" Rainbow Dash suddenly bolted. "I hear my mother calling!" she shouted and flew off.
....
I wonder if I look like that sometimes.
It would explain a lot.
***********
"I never used to encounter Immortals like this," I mumbled, then said more clearly to Fluttershy, "Anyway, so she wants you to save Dragonfly if you can."
"She means well, she's just crazy," Pinkie said.
I was in their room, leaning on the wall, while they were camped out on their bed. They were sharing a room.
"I will do my very best," Fluttershy said very seriously. "She is my sister, and I will save her."
"I have a lot of people to save," Pinkie said, studying herself in the mirror hung on the wall. "Celestia said she will help me."
"Good. Celestia likes to drive me crazy but she's a good person and she always tries to protect ponies," I said.
"I'm a little jealous you got to see her and I didn't," Fluttershy said, then put a hoof over her mouth.
"Well, it was an accident and they said to stop monkeying around without knowing what we were doing," I told her. "So you might have gotten in trouble."
I yawned. "I had best go to bed. Just wanted to tell you that, since she told me to."
"Thank you," Fluttershy said. "Sleep well and let the bed bugs bite, they need to eat too."
Druids are weird.
***********
"You might try talking to Dash," I told Rarity. "She seems to have some kind of relationship issue that she tried to talk to me about but she totally came unglued and tried to claim her mother was calling her." I hung up my coat. Rarity had already changed into her nightrobe. Sweetie was busy shuffling cards, dealing, then gathering and reshuffling.
"I would be glad to," Rarity said. "I had some coltfriends in school, so I know of such matters. Dash tends to either be very confident or very panicked, I've noticed."
I know that feeling. "I'm going to bathe," I said, heading for the bathroom.
"I can help!" Sweetie said, then sagged. "Oh, right."
I ruffled her mane. "Thanks, Sweetie. I'll be fine." I touched my back. "Being human does have its advantages."
"Bathing alone sounds boring," Sweetie said.
"Ever made a house of cards?" I told her.
"A what?"
I showed her the basics. "Work on that while I bathe," I told her and she got to work.
Rarity smiled at me and I smiled back. Sweetie's a good kid. A kid, but a good kid.
I felt a burst of magic in there while I was busy doing my hair. "Is everything okay?" I shouted.
"It's a letter!" Rarity shouted.
Okay. Ahh, bathing, one of the most wonderful of things. Soon, I was clean and happy, despite being reminded I now have DOUBLE tattoo action. I could feel the magic in it.
For one paranoid moment, I thought someone was in the room with me, but instead I heard Sweetie shout, "Dumb cards!"
"Just build it up again!" I shouted. "It's in the nature of cards to fall, but you can just pick them up and try again! It's persistence which leads to success!"
Or sometimes, blind luck, but you can't count on that.
'I couldn't have brought you here if you hadn't already tied yourself to Chaos!' Loki's voice echoed in my head. Ugh. I know why, but...
"Marcus, are you okay?" Rarity asked, sounding worried.
Great, I'm making noises and not realizing it.
"I'm fine," I said. "Just thinking about all the weird things we saw on our little journey."
I finished bathing, clad in my nice nightrobe, and came out. "Being clean is a wonderful thing."
"It certainly is," Rarity said.
I sat down on the bed, studying Sweetie's house of cards. "Nicely done," I said.
A few seconds later, it collapsed.
'bring Chaos'. Fuck you, Loki.
"Dammit!" Sweetie said.
"You shouldn't curse," I told her. "Who did you get a letter from, Rarity?"
"Your friend Helga."
FUCK.
"What about?"
"Girl talk," she said playfully.
Double FUCK.
Please, Helga, you had better be discreet.
"Now, lie down," Rarity said. "I'm going to give you a massage."
I was soon making happy noises.
Sweetie now leaned on the side of the bed. "Marcus told Mother Time and Father Nature... I mean Father Time and Mother Nature that we're very important to him." She smiled brightly.
I turned a little red. "Yes, I did," I said into my pillow.
I could FEEL Rarity's smile. "You're both very important to me too," she said.
I tried to read her mind. That could mean 'good buddy'... Helga would say that, after all. Or it could mean 'turn into a pony and TAKE ME NOW' or perhaps a more child-safe version of that sentiment. I don't even know if... I don't really want to know.
"I'm sure Father is going to like you very much," Sweetie said.
"He's going to hate me. I saw the inside of his mind and he is going to hate me," I said, then sighed into the pillow.
Rarity frowned. "Why?"
"He's the stern, tough type who doesn't like anyone who shows fear, like me."
Rarity sighed. "Yes, but you are not a coward. You may be scared, but you stood up for me and for everyone. He may have to be won over, but we WILL win him over." There was a steel in her voice which would brook no denial.
"You helped me get my Cutie Mark!" Sweetie said. "I'm sure he'll be grateful!"
"Just be careful you don't rub it in your friends' faces," I told her. "You might point out that they're part of it, since your group's mark is part of yours."
"Oooh, maybe they should try what I did," Sweetie said.
Rarity said, "They have to find their own but I think it's a sign you all are linked by destiny."
"I hope we'll be friends forever," she told us fervently.
Rarity and I glanced at each other, then Rarity said, "We hope so too." Her voice was kind, but I knew she understands.
"Oooh, now you can tell me all the secrets Cutie mark holders get to know!" Sweetie said.
"Once your friends get theirs, we'll tell you all at once, so none of you feel left out," I said quickly.
Ideally, Marjorie will eat me before then.
We soon went to bed and slept well.
****************
The next two days was a combination of studying how to use the horn Celestia had given me and working on various kinds of spell research with Rarity and Twilight. Twilight's a good teacher, and I could tell she enjoyed the hell out of it.
We also spent some time with Dona Carlotta, when she wasn't busy on the trade negotiations. It was nice to see her but it also made me nervous. Her boyfriend, Herr Otto, seems like a decent guy; he came around as well. He kept giving me funny looks for some reason, though.
Not 'I think you're Erik and I want 50,000 gold' looks but definitely he thought something odd about me. I don't know why.
The CMC were plotting something. I know the signs of sneaky plans and they were sneaky ALL OVER. They spent a lot of time making candy with Pinkie and Bon-Bon, and the four of us (myself, Rarity, Spike, and Twilight) kept getting called on to test various flavors. Some of it was a disaster (who thought horseradish was a good candy flavor?) and some was quite good (a lemon candy that Apple Bloom dreamed up).
The others were busy training, getting supplies and in the case of Applejack, fretting about her farm and constantly bugging Spike to mail Big Macintosh about things. We were busy preparing and studying and finding spells which would be useful. Especially we worked on anti-scrying magic. Without it, we couldn't achieve surprise.
Rarity and I took a walk in the gardens one afternoon to stretch our legs. Twilight was attending some ministry meeting at Celestia's invitation. Probably getting them used to the day when Twilight becomes one of the Princesses.
Spike had said he was going to his favorite donut shop, but in fact, he'd dressed up in his top hat and cloak and fake mustache and was stalking us. It was cute, really.
I was about to pluck a flower and place it over Rarity's ear when I realized I might get in trouble for that. The temptation was strong but the last thing I need is to give Spike an excuse to get me in trouble.
I could buy a flower, though; I have money. What an odd and wonderful feeling.
"Is it okay to pluck the flowers?" I asked Rarity.
"Probably best not to disturb them," Rarity said. "I'm not sure."
Fluttershy came into sight; she was busy playing with several bunnies and looking happy. Rarity stared, then looked relieved.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"Nothing," she said. "I guess they're used to her now."
We dodged another way and came to the castle hedge maze. It's huge. "Oooh, a maze," I said. "I like mazes."
"Then let's venture in," she said and we began to wander its highways and byways; at one point, we walked in on two ponies kissing, leading us to run off down another hallway.
"I don't think they noticed," Rarity said, looking a little flustered.
"They likely won't notice anything for a while," I said.
"EEEE!!!" Spike shouted behind us.
"Or maybe not," I said and we both laughed. There were sounds of shouting and running ponies.
That's one less pursuer.
There were various statues of famous ponies; some of them Rarity knew to tell me about, some not. But we whiled away our time pleasantly, chatting and looking at all the art which decorated it.
Then we came upon a strange thing, a large 'room' in the maze. There was a small building here, made of mud and straw bricks, with an enchantment upon it, protecting it from wind and weather. There were statues inside it and outside it, humans engaged in mundane tasks: a middle aged woman and her daughter were grinding corn down into cornmeal, a man was brewing some sort of alcohol, another woman was busy baking bread inside, a man was busy tanning a deerhide and yet another man was forging copper. Several children were weaving baskets.
It was like a miniature museum for a long gone lifestyle; the women all had their hair coiled up in fancy buns; the men all had their hair cut short and some of it in the back which was longer was somehow forced upward, kind of like a peacock's tail. Each of the men had one or more feathers in their hair; each of the women one or more flowers.
There were signs, which explained this was the 'Memorial of the Fallen', a tribute to the humans who had once dwelt in and around the plateau but who had been wiped out by the Orcs who had brought the Ponies here as slaves.
"Shouldn't this be in a more public place?" I asked.
"There's a museum down in the city," a voice said from behind the building.
We both jumped and the old pony came around; he was clearly a gardener. "The Princesses come here about once a week for a while," he said. He looked us up and down. "Lady Rarity," he said, bowing. "And who are you, young man?"
"I'm Samus Marcus, a unicorn human, sworn man of the Princesses."
"Oh, THAT human," he said knowingly.
Fuck.
"What does that mean?"
"I heard Princess Celestia fancied a human by that name. Very strange, but she bears so much weight, she has the right to indulge herself a little." He looked me up and down assessingly.
"She is just teasing," Rarity said firmly.
He looked at Rarity, then at me.
"I am sure she is not serious about it," I told him. "It's just friendly flirtation."
Now Rarity frowned. Aaargh, a million ways to interpret that, dammit.
"Well, enjoy your visit," he said. "I'm just washing the statues. They tend to collect a lot of dirt."
"We'll leave you to your work," I said to him.
We walked on, but I felt a little melancholy for the fallen. At least someone remembers them.
**************
The center had a gazebo with several swinging benches. Study showed they were the right size for two ponies to sit sphinx-style, facing each other. We sat down on one of them.
"Did you ever find out what Dash was so agitated about?" I asked.
"Overly jumpy relationship stuff. Soarin' has duties and practice and can't spend as much time with her as he could on the mission and she was feeling jumpy over whether this meant they were through or doomed and so on," Rarity said. "I was able to help her calm down and think it through."
"Cool," I said.
"So we're going dancing with them tonight," Rarity said.
"Okay," I said. May be a bit awkward for me as I'll likely be the only human there unless Ivan comes.
"Lyra says the place is VERY good. She and Bon-Bon are coming. In fact, we'll probably have quite the herd," Rarity said.
"That's fine," I said, staring off at the walls of the labyrinth, huge green hedges with little white and blue flowers.
"What's on your mind?" she said softly.
Wondering what's on YOURS, I thought. Could we have a relationship? I like her, but, you know, pony. Of course shapeshifting but then she'd want me to be a pony sometimes too. She'd have the right. I don't know... The idea boggles me.
But I like Rarity a lot.
"Every time I have something good, it blows up, or I blow it," I told her. "I'm just worrying in a circle." I sighed.
She patted my knee. "Don't be afraid. You are safe here. I know you've seen a lot of death." She sounded saddened by that. "But you're safe here and with us. And you know Celestia and Luna will protect you."
I'm carrying one of them on each hip.
Figuratively.
The problem, really, is that I can totally see hanging out with Helga like this. It was never romantic with us; I wasn't her type. But we did a lot of stuff together, even slept in the same bed; when you're an adventurer, you don't even split the party for sleeping.
I'm not brave enough to ask and I don't know what answer I want.
I put my hand on her hoof on my knee. "Thank you," I said to her.
If she was human...
But I could wish that until the cows come home.
I am going to have to come clean eventually.
We sat like that for a little while.
Sudden Celestia. "Hello, Marcus. I'm done stealing Twilight from you." She draped herself over me. "Now I will steal you for myself."
Twilight now came up cheerfully. "Hello, Rarity, Marcus." She looked at our hand and hoof on my knee and she smiled. "Sorry to interrupt you, but we need to get back to work."
Celestia was studying that herself thoughtfully and I said, "Are we going to go make magical hybrid babies now?" I said cheerfully. Best to get it over with.
Twilight and Rarity both froze, and Celestia said, "My, my, how forward you are," teasingly. "Do you say that to all the girls?"
"Only the best," I teased her back. Don't panic. She'll stop once I stop freaking out. "So how many babies are we talking?"
Twilight looked panicked. "I'm sorry, Celestia, I need them RIGHT NOW."
"Oh my, you are so passionate in your desire," Celestia said and Twilight turned red.
"Not like THAT," Twilight said, tugging on both Rarity and I. "We really have a lot of work to do before we go dancing tonight."
"So do I, since I am coming," Celestia said. ...
"Really?" Twilight said.
"I will have to disguise myself, but the Crusaders have told me I MUST come. And as a good princess, I must help my subjects."
Okay, now I am curious.
"Rarity, I will need you before we go to dress me up to look nice but not so regal it gives me away," Celestia said. "Once you dress Marcus and Twilight up."
"I can dress myself," Twilight said, sounding embarrassed.
"Yes, but Rarity will improve on that," Celestia said. "You should look your best for all the handsome young stallions who will no doubt flock to you." She gave me a look out of one eye.
What? I want Twilight to be happy and she's better off without someone who has lied to her. Even if...
Don't think such things. I deserve to have her get angry with me. It would be too easy if she forgave me just like that.
But I have to tell her anyway. Somehow. Without killing myself in terror.
"They'll be flocking to Rarity," Twilight told my feet.
"Darling, you will have all the men you could ever want when I'm done with you," Rarity said, grinning.
Twilight smiled nervously, and Celestia and Rarity had this eerily similar smile. I think I might have had it too. It's for her own good, really. It's best she forget about me.
Except I have to tell her eventually and she's going to be so hurt.
DAMMIT.
"We'd better go work," Twilight said, grabbing us and we let ourselves be taken.
*************
That evening, after I got suited up, I got dragged off by the CMC to a room. Ivan's, I think. I now realized he had it to himself.
Big Macintosh was here, looking a little overwhelmed as the fillies bounced around trying to suit him up.
They're trying to set up Celestia with BIG MACINTOSH?
Okay, he seems an okay guy but... Okay, I have no clue what Celestia goes for when not teasing me.
"Hey, Big Macintosh," I said. "So you're the mystery date for Celestia?"
"For Princess CELESTIA?" he said in shock.
The fillies laughed nervously.
"What, you didn't tell him?" I said, hands on my hips.
"We were going to!" Apple Bloom protested.
I buried my face in my hands. "I am so sorry," I told him. "I assumed they'd gotten a willing volunteer."
"It's okay," he said. "I just... does Princess Celestia know?" He sounded just a touch nervous.
The CMC tried to look as cute and innocent as possible.
I breathed in and out. "Celestia will be very happy to see you," I told him. If I have to kick her in the ass to get her to be happy. "She likes big, strong ponies." She does NOW.
If she can embarrass me all the time, she owes me. I am going to make this a good date for them for his hopeful sake if it kills me.
Even if, and probably nothing will come of it long term.
"Oh no!" Twist suddenly said.
"What?" I said.
"We forgot to get Luna a date too!" Twist said.
"She's coming too?"
"Yes," Twist said. "I think."
"Umm... it's such short notice..."
"I will find her a date," I told them. "Find a male pony to help you; I don't know how any of this goes on a pony. I'm sure one of the butlers can help you."
Ivan, you dragged me into this whole giant chain of events. Time for you to be an escort.
Where am I going to find anything decent for him to wear at this hour?
Dammit.
************
"Don Diego, you are a kind man," I told him. Even better, Silver Fork, Diego's butler, was off sprucing up Big Macintosh.
He had supplied Ivan with a nice suit and we were getting him all dressed up. He'll look Belcadizian, but since Belcadizians are hot, that's a good thing.
Ivan looked thoughtfully at Don Diego, who blinked. "Yes?"
"Hell, why not," Ivan said. "I should look the part." He got his potion of Polymorphing and took a long swallow. To my confusion, he seemed to have more potion than he'd had at the end of the mission even after drinking. His skin darkened and his features subtly shifted and his ears turned pointed and he now looked like a Belcadizian.
Don Diego stared, then laughed. "Many of my kin would beat you for that, but I think you look just fine. You and Princess Luna will have a fine time tonight."
I am torn between knowing Lyra will want to try that and knowing that Bon-Bon probably will not. Best not to make any more trouble for them.
"I hope so," Ivan said. "I haven't been to a dance in forever. If you count ones that didn't end in a riot, even longer."
Ahaha.
If we had a riot... Celestia would EGG IT ON.
AHAHAHAH.
"I wish I had brought my dear wife," Don Diego said sadly. "Unfortunately, she is deep in her research and probably is sleeping at her lab table as we speak."
"Oh god, who is in charge of keeping the CMC under control while we are at the dance?" I said. "Is Ditzy coming?" And will she actually keep them in check or fall asleep?
"I have heard alternating rumors that she does or does not have a boyfriend and he is or is not coming," Ivan said. "And I have no idea who is going to keep the kids from leveling the place."
"Well, I could take care of them," Don Diego said.
Oh bloody hell.
"That would be great," Ivan said.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
This is how the world ends. Don Diego and five young, impressionable minds who have an appetite for adventure.
I don't know how I know this, but either Celestia planned this or somewhere she is laughing RIGHT THIS MINUTE.
Oh boy.
Then Rarity charged in, grabbed me, and pulled me off.
***************
"Marcus, we have a grave responsibility tonight," Rarity said to me urgently. She was dressed up in a nice purple dress I don't think I've seen before. "Very grave. And some crises to resolve before we go."
"Go on?" I said.
"Fluttershy has locked herself in a closet and won't come out ever," Rarity said. "She's naturally shy and doesn't have a date and if we aren't careful, even if she goes, she'll lurk and wish she was cuddling animals or hugging trees."
I nodded. "Right."
"Big Macintosh is apparently here and my sister and her friends are setting him up with Celestia and I cannot see how this cannot end in disaster. I don't wish to see him embarrassed," Rarity said, frowning.
"Silver Star is helping him right now. I'll talk to him once I get a chance," I told her. "I found Luna a date too."
"Twilight is reading books about meeting boys; if we do not take action, she will STILL be reading when she could be actually MEETING said boys," Rarity continued. She consulted her floating checklist. "Someone has to run herd on my sister and her friends but basically, it seems EVERYONE in our group is going."
"Don Diego has volunteered to take care of them," I said. I'm sorry, Canterlot. I am SO sorry.
She looked relieved. "I forgot, we have met some of the Glantrians. Dona Carlotta and her boyfriend are coming with us, at Twilight's invitation. They should ideally not be any trouble as long as you stop looking at him funny."
"He looks at ME funny," I protested.
Rarity adjusted her glasses, which she was wearing for some reason. "Darling, you keep looking at him as if you think Dona Carlotta would be better off dating a box of donuts. Is there some reason you don't like him?"
"He's fine," I told her.
Rarity sighed. "Fine. Just mute the glares, okay?"
"I'm not glaring," I grumbled.
He just isn't very impressive compared to her.
That's ALL.
"Now Sweetie glares at him too," Rarity said, sighing. "And doesn't even know why. Just that you glare."
I buried my face in my hands. "Okay, okay, no glaring."
She sighed. "I'm sorry to badger you, dear, but this *has* to be better than our last group outing. Which was a disaster. Now, next on the agenda," she said, ticking off the list. "Applejack has to be convinced to dress up at least a little. Pinkie is actually totally fine, except she's fretting over her... you know what I mean. I can't really call them 'imaginary' now. Ivan... does he have something nice to wear?"
"Suited up by Don Diego," I said.
"What a dashing fellow he is, and a true gentleman," Rarity said, smiling. Check mark made. "Spike is suited up, thankfully. Spike understands the importance of looking stylish." She sounded very approving. "Can you talk to Twilight? I will handle Fluttershy and TRY to get Applejack to fancy up a little."
"Is Ditzy okay?"
"Oh my, I nearly forgot," Rarity said. "I need to find out if her 'boyfriend' is actually real and her boyfriend and coming or if he is as imaginary as the 'Oards'." She said the latter word with clear disbelief in their existence
Which may not be imaginary. "I will check in with Ditzy if you are handling two people."
"Thank you, darling," Rarity said. "There's another thing, but... meet with me once we get everyone else in motion."
"Okay," I said, wondering what it was as I ran off.
*************
"Twilight, all you need is to show up," Spike said to Twilight, who had six books out and was frantically making a list. "And talk to people. It will be fine. You certainly can't learn all this in twenty minutes."
"If I screw this up, Rarity won't be happy at all, she keeps telling me I need to meet some guys and I don't even know what to say, I mean they aren't likely to want to talk about the problem of dating Pharaoh Thutmose V!" Twilight said frantically.
I stood in the doorway, then said, "Just be your lovable self," I told her. "They'll be there because they WANT to meet beautiful, intelligent ponies like you."
Twilight turned a little red and Spike said, "EXACTLY. You're dressed well, and you will rock the house."
It was a blue dress with white stars and I thought it looked very nice. "And dancing's not hard," I told her, coming over. I took her by the hooves and spun her around, circling the room in a pretty standard three-step move-set. "Don't you have dances in Ponyville?"
"Half the time I have to DRAG her," Spike said, shaking his head. "It's gonna be just fine, Twilight."
A white coated earth pony, wearing sunglasses, with a multi-colored mane, stuck her head into the room. "You two look marvelous together," she said warmly. I didn't know her voice or her face, though she was the size of a male pony. Her cutie mark was a pony getting a pie to the face. She wore a sky blue blouse with a pink pie on it and a long dark blue cloak.
See, how do you get anyone to NOT see it coming with that cutie mark?
"Hi, I'm afraid I don't know you," Twilight said. "I'm Twilight Sparkle and these are my friends Spike and Samus Marcus."
I twirled Twilight around and dipped her, then bowed. "A pleasure to meet you, ma'am. Please, no pies, we're about to go out."
"Awww," she said. "Not even a cupcake?"
"You can throw one at me," Spike said.
Nimbly, she extracted a cupcake with her tail and flung it at Spike, who caught it and ate it. "Thanks!"
She blinked, then laughed. "I am Vanilla Surprise," the pony said, bowing to us. "Where is my secret date?"
"We wou... OH," I said. It's CELESTIA. Nice disguise. "He's suiting up in Ivan's room." I gave her directions, not sure if she knew where to find it.
"Thanks!" she said and ran off.
"Wait, whose date is she?" Twilight asked. ...
"That was Celestia," I said.
"It was not Celestia at all," Spike said.
NOT AGAIN!!!!
"She didn't look like Celestia," Twilight said.
THAT IS THE IDEA.
I gave up. "Well, she's stealing Celestia's date if she's not Celestia," I said.
"We have to stop her!" Twilight said and charged off.
Tiny, petty revenge... is still revenge.
**********
Ditzy and Dinky had, in some way, become tangled up together in a huge grey sweater and were rolling around the floor of their room trying to get out.
I stared mindlessly.
"Help, it has us!" Dinky shouted.
I finally got it off them. "Thank you," Ditzy said. "I'll be suited up properly in just a minute."
"Is it true you have a boyfriend and he is coming?" I asked.
"He's just a friend but he will meet us there," Ditzy said. "Unless he has to go fight the Oards or the Blackballs or the Space Hippos again." She sounded quite worried this might be the case.
IE, he may or may not even exist.
Ditzy began putting on a pink and white dress which Dinky seemed to love but which I thought was too bright. "You look very nice," she said.
"Thanks," I said.
"You're going to have lovely children one day," Ditzy continued as Dinky helped pull the dress into place.
"I am? Do you do prophecies or something?" I have the impression that Ditzy does sphere and bubble magic with her cutie mark.
"I... no reason. Forget I said that," Ditzy said evasively, then began trying to get her cloak on.
I raised an eyebrow. "Ditzy, what's going on?"
"Nothing at all," she said. "Nothing to see here!" She rolled around for no reason. "MUFFIN!" she shouted. Her eyes went extra googly. But I could tell she was pretending.
"You can't fake insanity to me," I said, hands on my hips. "I used to wiggle out of chores by faking possession." I think.
"Oh no, it's the fog monster!" Dinky shouted and now fog rolled over everything; I heard the sound of ponies running away through the fog.
"..."
Then I heard the sound of collisions and someone shouting about pianos and a terrible noise like a pony hit half the keys on such with her body at once.
Time to go the OTHER way.
************
I was on my way to find Rarity when I realized someone was watching me. But I couldn't SEE anyone. This could be trouble or it could mean some of the CMC are stalking me.
"Man, Scootaloo looks like a chicken," I said loudly.
"DO NOT!" Scootaloo said.
BUSTED.
I grabbed her and pulled the cloak back. "Why are you following me?"
"It's just a coincidence we're sneaking this way," Apple Bloom said, now giving away HER position.
"Don Diego is going to take care of you all tonight," I told them.
"We want to go to the dance, because we know something cool will happen and maybe we'll get a Cutie Mark!" Scootaloo said.
"Yeah, it's OUR TURN," Apple Bloom said firmly.
"It's going to be adults dancing and holding hands and kissing, and you'd be bored out of your skull," I told them. "Holding hooves... whatever the pony equivalent is."
Scootaloo looked at her hoof. "Why would you hold a hoof? Are my horseshoes slipping?"
"This is why you'd be bored. Don Diego will entertain you a lot more."
"But you get into cool adventures! Orcs will attack or something and then we STILL won't have Cutie Marks," Apple Bloom said.
I began herding them along. "Nothing exciting is going to happen," I told them. Thus foolishly DOOMING myself.
***************
Rarity was flopped out on the bed. "I am tired before we even start," she said dramatically.
I helped her up. "You'll be fine once the music hits you," I told her. "Anyway, what's the thing you wanted to ask me about?"
Rarity shuffled on her feet, then studied herself in the mirror. "Does this dress suit me? Maybe it needs to match my hair more precisely."
"It looks fine," I told her. "You will knock them dead tonight."
"You always say the sweetest things," she said, smiling, then looked nervous anyway.
"Which makes you worry that I'm just saying it to be nice?" I said.
She froze.
"There are times where I butter people up, but when I compliment you, I mean it," I told her, patting her shoulder. "I try to be nice to everyone," I continued.
"Except Herr Otto," she said, a little sharply.
"You know she could do better," I told Rarity. "But I keep my mouth shut because I have no right to say anything."
"It's pretty noticeable how you sprinkle sugar on everyone but him, dear," Rarity said, looking at both of us in the mirror.
Not as subtle as I thought.
I studied myself in the mirror. Not bad looking but Erik had been substantially more handsome. As I measure it, anyway. That had been a nice body.
"Don't pout," Rarity said firmly to me, sounding aggravated. "I'm just telling the truth."
I sighed. "Thinking about past bodies I've had," I said softly.
Now she looked worried. "I only care about this one," she said, then put a hoof to her face. "That totally came out wrong."
"It's okay," I told her. "I'm trying to face forwards too. I don't want to lie around angsting over past lives." Too many reasons to fear THIS life.
I have to tell her everything, tell Twilight, and I can't do it.
"Exactly," she said. "I don't want to wallow in my past either." She licked her lips nervously, then floated a small jar out of her carrybag; it had four lemon gummies in it. "Marcus," she said, then hesitated.
"I do like those gummy candies," I told her. Had she made them as a present?
"I... have a proposal," she said hesitantly.
"Okay," I told her. A proposal which involves four gummy candies?
"Don't say okay until you hear it," she said. "You might not want to, and you have the right to say no." Her voice was hesitant. "I just think it would be a good idea to try this tonight, when it... will just be for fun."
I studied them... MAGIC. Shapeshifting magic. My eyes widened.
"This candy has been tested by Pinkie and Twist, who made it with input from Twilight," Rarity said carefully. "It will transform you AND your clothing for up to two hours each. So I will spend half the night as a human and you will spend half of it as a pony." She licked her lips very nervously.
I remembered Luna's words. 'That being said, you will likely sometimes find it advantageous or useful to take on a pony form, working for us.' And this would protect my clothing. "So it changes the clothing to suit?"
"Yes," she said. "I know you'd be too embarrassed going around naked, and we're trying to dress up anyway. It would look gauche if Big Macintosh wore a nice suit and you did not."
I closed my eyes for a few seconds to steady my nerves. If this goes wrong, I lose this suit AND get exposed and everything goes to hell and Twilight will blow me up, then cry and neither will make me happy. And Rarity won't be happy either.
I'm afraid and so sick of being afraid.
It's not the fear, it's whether you surrender to fear, a tiny Celestia in my head told me.
I do NOT want my conscience or whatever this is talking to me with her voice in my head!
"I'm nervous, but let's do it," I said.
"I'm nervous too," Rarity said softly. "What does it feel like?"
"It will feel strange. I remember the time I was a cat," I told her. "My senses changed, my balance... good shapeshifting magic compensates with the physical instincts, but you still have all sorts of things going on you're not used to." I licked my lips nervously. "Flip to see who goes first?"
"Okay," she said.
I got out an Equestrian Silver Bit; one side showed Luna and the other side the Moon. I flipped it nervously and it tumbled, then I missed it and it landed on the floor. "Oh wait, we forgot to call heads or tails," I mumbled.
She laughed. "Heads, you go first, tails, I go first."
I flipped it again. Tails. The Moon. Which I think would be tails here. "Tails, you win."
She opened the jar and pulled out and unwrapped a gummy, then devoured it. For a few seconds, nothing happened, but then, she gave a pained cry and I winced. She began to glow and her body to change, limbs shifting configuration, face changing, clothing shifting to fit a human figure.
She still had long flowing purple hair and blue eyes, but now she had pale skin, reminiscent of a 'pureblood' Alphatian (a type rarely found in Alphatia any more). Her dress had reconfigured to fit her feminine frame, which I found quite pleasing. In fact, within a few seconds, I felt a surge of hormones which I tried not to show. She was wearing the earrings I had bought her, which made me smile. She was slightly shorter than me, but not hugely so. And she still had a horn.
She looked at herself, smiled, then nearly fell down. Her dress swished about her legs, nearly trapping them several times. "How do I look?" she asked.
"Simply smashing," I told her warmly. She was so beautiful and I wanted... but we're not... But she may want...
SHUT UP BRAIN. "When you wear off, I will take one," I told her. "It doesn't hurt, I hope."
"The change itself is not pleasant, it's like trying to walk with a leg gone to sleep," she said.
I took her hand and kissed it, then took her arm with mine. "My dear little human," I said. "It is time for us to have some fun."
"You will have to show me the human dances," she said, oddly shyly.
"And you will have to show me the pony ones," I told her. This is going to be wonderful.
Or I will die.
Or both.
**************
Luna had taken on a human form as well. Or more precisely, she also was a Belcadizian elf, rather than human, wearing a red dress, lower cut than I would have expected (Rarity's dress dipped only a tiny bit at the neck). Only her blue hair marked her as not a normal Belcadizian; even her dress was in a Belcadizian style and she had a red rose tucked over one ear.
'Vanilla Surprise', AKA Celestia, had put on a somewhat fancier outfit, devoid of pies, to match Big Macintosh's nice suit. He seemed much more relaxed now, though at times, he shuffled a little uncomfortably, not used to so much clothing.
We'd all assembled and were ready to go. Ditzy looked at me nervously, but I just waved. Best to let it go for now. I don't think the future is fixed, anyway.
"Hey, alright," Ivan said, looking at Rarity far more than he had to. She twirled about, her skirts flaring; you could tell she had on three layers worth now. Somehow, as I didn't notice that many layers when she was a pony.
Don't stare, Ivan, I thought.
Twilight smiled brightly. "Your dress looks wonderful, Rarity."
"She is quite beautiful," I said firmly and Rarity smiled brightly.
Ditzy said, "Let's go. My friend is going to meet us there."
"Oh, Dr. Smith?" Twilight said.
"Yes," Ditzy said, smiling.
"Dr. Smith?" I asked.
"He's a history professor; he visits Ponyville a lot," Twilight said.
Ditzy had that 'AHAHAHAHAHA, I know a secret' smile that made me suspect there was more to 'Dr. Smith'.
Hopefully not the kind of 'more' which ends this party in fire.
**************
We rode in carriages to the dancehall, though Luna put a simple illusion on them to avoid giving away that they were royal carriages. We all got out and I found, to my utter surprise... someone had set up a sausage in a bun stand in front of Club DanceMoor. The teenage human girl in black running it looked exactly as bored and frustrated as one would expect. There was a green umbrella over the stand with the words 'DJ BIG D'S SAUSAGES' painted on it in black. "Big D saus..." Then the girl blinked at Luna, Ivan, myself, and Rarity.
"You friends of Dad?" she asked in surprise.
"Are you Aalbanese?" I asked curiously.
"Yeah, I dunno how Dad talked his brother into sending him along on the trade mission but he's here guest-DJing," the girl said. "We're from the Tri-Principality area." Krondahar, New Klantyre, and Bergdhovern basically clump together in north-central Glantri. Aalban is sometimes included, though it would make it the 'Quad-Principality area' which just doesn't sound as good. "Anyway, I got stuck here trying to sell sausages to Ponies. This was probably one of Dad's better ideas, really." She sighed. "By the way, don't notice he's an alchemist. It's supposed to be a secret, but he's terrible at keeping it."
"I'll try not to notice," I told her.
"Man, those smell good, but we can't really take food in," Ivan said, frowning.
"That's the other problem," the young lady grumbled.
Rarity sniffed the food and her eyes widened. "I feel strange," she said.
Was this a hint? Probably. "Would you like to try one?" I asked Rarity. "Or is that a 'prelude to illness' strange?"
"Not on the food," the girl said desperately.
"I..." Rarity hesitated, staring at the sausages. "Yes, I will," she said determinedly, though her hands shook a little.
"Would you like one, Lunette?" Ivan asked her.
"Yes, I would," she said. "I think it's a good idea to support enterprising young ladies."
I bought one for myself with just tomato sauce and white sauce. Rarity went hogwild, having hers slathered with everything.
"We're going to go ahead inside," Dash said to us. "While you all pig out."
I jumped; I'd managed to briefly forget everyone else was here. Sorry, guys.
"See you soon," Ivan said as the rest headed inside.
Rarity studied hers, then closed her eyes and took a bite. She ate delicately, but ended up with a big mess around her lips. I also ate carefully, and had minimal mess. Ivan and 'Lunette' apparently had a competition to see who could eat the fastest, then got ANOTHER one, to my surprise. Didn't they eat dinner?
"That was very good," Rarity said, surprised. "I would have another if I wasn't so full."
"Me too," I said.
"Dad will be ecstatic. Anyway, go have fun while I slowly go mad out here," the lady running the stand said.
I wiped Rarity's mouth and she wiped mine and we both laughed and headed inside.
************
o/~ There's a thought eater controlling me
o/~ And it's underneath the table.
"..."
The music had a pretty strong beat to it, but the lyrics, sung in a hideous voice, were terrible. A blue haired pony wearing sunglasses was up on a dais behind a pile of weird techno-magical equipment with a bunch of Blackmoorian style sound discs; there was also a tall, skinny, ugly human doing the singing and operating the equipment, while his pony companion looked very amused. He wore a battered white longcoat, covered with chemical stains; I would guess he must be the not-very-secret alchemist.
There are seven 'secret crafts' of magic in Glantri. In practice, most people can guess if you can belong to one of them, *especially* the alchemists, for obvious reasons.
Club DanceMoor had a Blackmoorian theme to it, full of techno-magical things which probably were entirely magic or just art. But it looked authentic to my casual knowledge. I didn't see Twilight...
Twilight was reading off a list to a green coated, black maned stallion who seemed a little overwhelmed, while Spike tugged on her leg. That's our Twilight.
I laughed softly. "Shall we dance?"
We moved out onto the floor, which was full of ponies; some were doing line dances, some in couples, some in coupled lines; Pegasi were dancing in the air above us. There were a handful of humans and elves here, Aalbanese and Belcadizians, and a larger group of Glantrian ponies.
The Belcadizian waltz is an easy dance if you can follow a beat. Or at least, I got enough practice it's easy for me. Dona Carlotta and Herr Otto saw us and joined us, two couples flowing in unison; I don't know if Rarity learned this dance somewhere or is a quick learner. Either way, we flowed together fluidly and it was wonderful. I could feel magic everywhere and the music pounded out a beat and I was swept away. We were dancing more formally than most of the couples, but I like formal dancing. Also, not having four legs, I couldn't copy the others anyway.
Though I will soon. It made me nervous something would go wrong and expose me. But I tried to shove that aside; it was easy with Rarity here.
I saw Ditzy dancing with a sepia-coated, brown maned pony with a golden hourglass cutie mark. Okay, THAT made me nervous.
"Are hourglass cutie marks common?" I asked Rarity as we swung ninety degrees and she spun. She stumbled, but quickly recovered. The potion provides fundamental instincts but not huge amounts of skill. I'm surprised she's done this well.
"Moderately," Rarity said. "Usually it means the person works as a clock or watchmaker or a historian."
Well, maybe I need not worry.
Dona Carlotta and Herr Otto now moved in and switched partners with us and we moved into a really fancy dance; Dona Carlotta and I had to take the lead, as it was clear Otto and Rarity didn't have our depth of experience (though not surprising at all in Rarity's case; I was quite impressed she was doing so well.) We circled the floor, switching back and forth in a series of elaborate moves, culminating in a rush straight forward to our original starting point and flickering out to where we stood side by side, free arms extended, the Butterfly.
Lunette and Ivan applauded us and we then had to show them how to do the dance; this took a while but was lots of fun; we soon had all the humans and elves in the place doing it; some of the ponies joined us, like Lyra and Bon-Bon.
I could see 'Vanilla Surprise' teaching Big Mac how to do some kind of pony dance that involved a lot of mirroring; it reminded me a little of the cha-cha. He was strong but not agile, so he struggled with it, but he had a very determined look and she smiled kindly at him the whole time.
I suspect I will not look any better but if Rarity is willing to do this for me, I have to reciprocate, nervous as I am.
We took a short break to get a drink; I was rather hot in my suit now and she in her dress. "It's strange," she said. "I can't smell you." She sounded disappointed.
"Given I apparently smell like bacon, maybe that's for the best," I mumbled into my cider. I didn't want to drink too much but Ponies make some good mixed drinks and other beverages.
Rarity had something that looked orange and had a tiny umbrella in it for no reason. She sipped it and smiled. "Interesting, it tastes different!" She took another sip. "I *like* your smell. It lets me know you are near or were there recently. How do humans tell each other are near?"
"Eyes, hearing," I said. I put a hand on her shoulder. "Touch. The usual."
"I miss being able to smell everyone," she said softly. "All I can smell here are the... bad smells." She wrinkled her nose.
"Your field of sight is more limited too." Oh man, I hope she doesn't walk into anything.
She blinked. "You're right." She took another sip and studied her hands. "On the other hand, these are nice." She took my hand and ran her fingers along the surface; her hands were smooth and soft and unscarred; mine were somewhat battered and worn. "How long have you been Marcus?" she asked softly.
"A few days before you met me," I told her.
Her eyes widened.
"I'm not even sure how exactly I died," I confessed.
Her eyes tried to widen more but ran out of room. She clasped my hand. "Marcus," she said warmly and sadly at once.
"Without Applejack, I would have been Marcus less than two weeks," I told her.
She shivered. "You would have stayed dead. Because your charge was up."
"Yes," I said sadly. Then I shook my head. "Let's not think of that. I can lie around and moan any time, but this time here together is fleeting." I downed my glass. "Let's make this a night to remember!"
We clinked glasses, then joined hands and went out to dance some more.
************
"Ask her to dance," I told the yellow coated, white maned earth pony who had been watching Twilight for the last fifteen minutes.
"She's so pretty," he mumbled.
"She is a beautiful unicorn and she's very friendly, but too many people are staring instead of asking her to dance," I told him, wondering what was wrong with these people. "You only live once."
Rarity was dancing with one of Herr Otto's friends, so I was on my own for the moment.
"Okay," I'll do it," he said. He had a cutie mark of a book, so hopefully, they'd get on well. Well enough to dance at least.
I flitted off and soon ended up dancing with Lunette. I spun her around and she laughed. "This is so much fun," she said. "We almost never get to just cut loose."
I could see Vanilla Surprise in a huge line dance now, with Big Mac in the men's line; they were having fun. "Ce... your sister is having fun too," I said, smiling.
"And so is he," Lunette said, smiling. She spun me around now and I gave a happy sigh. "I'm surprised to see you setting Twilight up with someone."
I laughed nervously. "I'll dance with her later when I'm a pony but since she seems to be lurking more than taking the initiative, I've kicked a few ponies her way." And stopped her consulting some book THREE TIMES. She must really be nervous.
Lunette studied me, making *me* nervous, and I swung her low, then brought her back up. "You want her to be happy," she said softly.
"Yes," I said. "She deserves happiness." Why wouldn't I want her to be happy?
I could see Ivan pontificating to some elven woman he was dancing with; she looked a little overwhelmed and I laughed softly. "Umm..." I didn't know if I should ask.
"Applejack tells me he makes a rather handsome pony," Lunette said with an impish smile.
"Is she..."
"I think Applejack is married to her farm, though I could be wrong," Lunette said. "I am curious, but I won't push him."
"I...Rarity got Pinkie and company to make a shapeshifting candy. I'm going to try... being a pony for a little bit... since Rarity did this for me," I said nervously.
I dipped her again, then we spun around each other, then darted forward in a charge, side by side. "Good," she said. "You've been animals before, right?"
"I've been a cat," I told her. I glanced at Rarity and felt my body suddenly pound. This is rather disorienting.
"You'll be fine," Luna said. "I'm proud of you for being willing to do it for her."
I feel like a kid being praised by Mommy. Don't be nervous. The spell will protect my identity.
I hope.
***********
I heard a distant Rarity yelp; she'd backed up to avoid someone who ran in front of her, but she'd stumbled into a pony, leading to a several pony and Rarity pileup. I ran to her aid and picked her up, then helped the ponies up and we both apologized to them. Rarity's usual charm soon had them disarmed.
We made one last dance and then she felt the candy starting to wear off. She yelped again, drawing stares and now dwindled down into her usual white pony self. My body now felt extremely confused as my hormones didn't know where to go or what to do.
"Marcus, darling, are you alright?" Rarity said, worried.
"Let me sit down and have a drink, and then I can take my turn," I told her. "I must need fresh air."
We went and got another drink; I just got apple juice. I could see Twilight dancing with a pegasus I didn't know. Good for her. Even if... Good for her.
If I... no, no, no. I...
"Marcus, are you sure you're okay?" Rarity asked, worried.
"I am thinking too much," I told her, drinking more of my drink. It was soothing. "I hope you enjoyed it," I told her.
She had something that smelled of pineapple. "I had a good time, but it was often disorienting. I felt like things were sneaking up behind me because I could hear but not see them." She sniffed my hand. "You feel more like Marcus now that I can smell you again. Not being able to smell you made you feel like you were someone else."
"Well, I normally can't smell you at all," I told her. I wondered what Rarity would smell like.
I'll find out soon. I licked my lips nervously and drank more of my drink.
My body feels so strange. Dammit, body, calm down.
The urge to just RUN was strong, but I fought it down. She could tell my agitation. She wasn't this nervous, so I shouldn't be, except I just spent two hours with a beautiful woman and now my body is all worked up.
Dammit.
I finished my drink. "Okay, before I worry myself to death," I said. "Hit me."
She blinked, then nodded. Out came the candy; the bartender studied us curiously and I got the candy and she put the jar away.
BREATHE.
I breathed in, and out and ate the candy. DAMN this is tasty as hell! "Wow, these taste GREAT."
I could see Vanilla Surprise looking at me. She looked VERY amused.
BITE ME.
The enchantment hovered in my mind.
Pony, I thought. Pony pony pony.
Point of no return.
Until it wears off, anyway.
************
FUCK it hurt, though not for long. It was totally like having a limb fallen asleep. ALL of them.
And then everything changed. The world got... bigger. I could see people nearly behind me, which was extremely surreal. And the smells. They hit me like a wall and I stumbled. Tons of smells I didn't know, couldn't recognize. Sounds, I could hear everyone talking at once, couldn't focus myself to stop hearing. Rarity tried to say something but it was hard to make myself hear the words. And all these dangerous smells.
Did I smell wolf? Something dangerous. People staring, smells I don't know, all these creatures, are they all really ponies? Why do they smell strange? Why do I smell all these things I DO NOT KNOW AND ANY OF THEM COULD BE DANGEROUS!
Other ponies nearby shifted nervously, responding to my growing panic and now Rarity looked very worried. The bartender said, "This is why I stick to this body."
I could see him and Rarity and some couple kissing behind me all at once, which was impossible and disorienting and all these smells, and the alcohol... how can anyone drink something which smells that much?
I have to get out of here. All these smells, all these people, I don't know these smells, something could hurt me!
I got too distracted by Twilight and Rarity to remember to see about recharging my sword and I could DIE.
"Marcus, what's wrong?" Rarity said, coming over to me as I braced myself to run for the exit and not to stop until all the danger went away. I could smell her, the scent of lilacs. She was so utterly beautiful that all I could do was stare and feel my hormones surge. ACK. At least I have pants on still.
Which probably looks weird on a pony.
"You're so beautiful," I said, though I suspect no one has ever sounded so utterly scared when they said that, before me.
That's me, an innovator.
She smiled brightly. "You are a very handsome stallion." She studied me. "You know, you look a fair amount like Twilight."
WHAT?
Did I smell wolf? I smell something dangerous! All these smells, I have to get out of here! "We have to run," I told her. "Before it gets us!"
"What gets us?" she said, looking around.
"I don't know, but I can't think and there's all this movement and smells and I don't know and it's dangerous!" I said frantically. "Come on, RUN!"
So we ran through the mob; having really wide vision helped me navigate through the crowd but the press of ponies slowed me down and that fueled my panic as Rarity ran with me; I could smell her worry. "Marcus, stop, it's safe here! You're okay!" she said, sounding guilty and worried.
"Everywhere I go, there's all these things I don't know," I said frantically. Running through the mob of dancers made it WORSE, in fact, and I stopped, feeling trapped as people danced around us. Also, wanting to... she... aaaaaaa!!!
My one comfort was that I could smell and see and hear Rarity; I knew her. I felt so weirdly alone in a sea of bodies, but I had a lifeline.
"Marcus, stop!" she said and got ahead of me. "You're fine, you're fine," she said urgently. "What is wrong?"
"I can't... there's all these smells and my brain is trying to sort them and it doesn't know them and it's like something is jabbing my panic center with a hammer," I said to her, fighting the strong urge to flee these dangerous, unknown smells. They could be ANYTHING.
Did I smell wolf? Or did I imagine it? It was dangerous, whatever it was.
Rarity blinked, then her eyes widened and she nodded. "Nuzzle me," she said.
More physical contact is going to make my other set of instincts go more crazy. But I did as she said. Pressed close to her, my face swaddled in the fabric of her dress, the other smells retreated. From her purse, five thimbles flew out and comforting scratched behind my ears and on my back and slowly I relaxed. "You like that, right?" she said softly.
"It feels wonderful," I said, feeling my panic dying down some.
"Better?" she said softly after a bit.
Fluttershy had somehow appeared or something. Maybe she teleported. She was wearing sunglasses and a big floppy hat and looked slightly hunted. But when she saw me, she somehow... grew more confident? Her fear melted, replaced by compassion. She smelled like butter. I felt like something clicked in my mind as I realized that. Panic levels down by half a percent. She now said softly, "It's okay, Marcus. Shapeshifting is very disorienting, especially a big jump like this."
"I thought cats had good noses but I didn't have this much trouble," I mumbled into Rarity's dress.
Fluttershy gently stroked me with her hoof. I could feel... something. My panic died down a little with each stroke. "This place is especially stinky," she said, then giggled a little. "If I had known you two planned this, I would have taken you somewhere to practice where you could adjust without so much to adjust to."
"Thanks," I said.
"It wasn't so bad for me," Rarity said, frowning. "Except everything seemed a little wrong because I couldn't smell everyone. Marcus didn't seem like Marcus without his scent." That clearly displeased her.
"You smell wonderful," I told Rarity. "And I like Fluttershy's smell, but everyone likes butter."
Fluttershy guided us over by one wall, out of the press of ponies. "Brush his mane," she said and Rarity began grooming my rather tangled, messy mane. As she worked on me, I felt soothed by it.
"Why the disguise?" I asked Fluttershy.
"If anyone recognizes me, everyone will want to dance with me," she said urgently.
"But you're a lovely pony, kind and gentle. It's only natural," I told her and she blushed a little.
Rarity looked embarrassed. "Fluttershy is a bit of a celebrity but doesn't like it."
"They don't like me, just the idea of me," Fluttershy said softly.
Soarin' made a noise and I jumped, ready to bolt. Then I smelled him and Dash. She smelled minty and he smelled... dammit, I know this herb... This herb I know but can't name. Soarin' said, "Hey, Fluttershy, I know how you feel."
Fluttershy started. "What? Oh, hi," she said. She hadn't noticed them either.
"Being a Wonderbolt is pretty awesome, but, well... it means most people don't see me, they just see this outfit." He touched his uniform, then sighed.
Dash now looked kind of nervous. She put an arm... leg... foreleg... around him and he did the same and she relaxed. "Well, I know the real you," she said, hesitantly.
"I'm going to teach you to play chess," he said to her.
She blinked. "Okay."
"And you can teach me something you love," he said.
She mumbled about love; even my keen ears couldn't follow it.
Rarity continued to brush my hair and I continued to cuddle up to her as much as a pony could. My nerves continued to slowly untangle.
"Can you get everyone?" Fluttershy said to Dash. "Just one or two at a time, so he can get everyone's scents and know us."
"What's wrong?" Dash asked frowning.
"Marcus is used to barely smelling anything and now he can smell everypony, the spilled drinks, the tobacco in the air from smokers, everything," Rarity said sympathetically. "He doesn't know what is dangerous and what is not and his brain tends to think everything he doesn't know is dangerous." She continued to groom me, and I drew comfort from her presence. Without it, I would have just run and run until I couldn't smell anything.
"That's our Marcus," Dash said, laughing.
Thanks Dash. THANKS FOR NOTHING.
"Damn, Marcus, you can't even go naked as a pony," Applejack said. She smelled, of course, of apples. Fermented apples. Mmm, damn, she smells good.
"I don't make you wear clothing, you can let me wear clothing," I said, fighting the urge to whimper. "This is hard enough without adding to my urge to panic." My voice wobbled. Ugh.
"You sound different," Applejack said thoughtfully. She circled me, sniffing. "Damn, nice smell, though."
I sniffed. "I can't seem to smell myself," I said.
"You smell musky, like a nice cologne," Rarity said to me. "I like it, though it is a little confusing."
"Yeah," Soarin' said. "My brain keeps trying to tell me you have to be someone else."
"I like the bacon smell better," Pinkie said. "How about a cookie?"
"Yes," I said and let her feed it to me. I felt a little better and now my legs weren't shaking and Rarity continued to groom my mane. It looked nicer now; it's still brown and I can see I am a kind of light purple, as if... you know, it's kind of like Rarity and Twilight had a child or something.
Pinkie then reached inside my shirt. "Umm, Pinkie, what are you doing?" I asked. She smells of sugar as I'm sure you knew without me telling you.
"Don't you need to strip?" she said.
"I'm staying like this," I said firmly.
Pinkie got a weird look, then backed up slightly. "Sorry, Rarity."
"It's fine, dear. If Marcus *was* going to strip, though, I would help him," she said, then smiled impishly.
DAMN YOU HORMONES.
"Thank you," I said, a little embarrassed.
One by one, everypony came up to me and talked to me quietly, let me smell them, and then milled about. My nerves finished relaxing, thankfully.
Ditzy smelled of cotton candy and Dr. Smith... he smelled old, like an ancient library of dusty tomes. "You didn't have a horn before," he said to me curiously.
I blinked. "Wait, is it visible now?" I tried to look at my forehead, but I can't see it.
He blinked back, turning his head to regard me with his right eye. "It was invisible?"
"Yes," I said.
Vanilla Surprise smelled of Vanilla, but VERY strongly, like it covered something else. Big Macintosh and Applejack had subtly different apple scents. I could smell their relationship, though.
My nerves were still jangling, though not as badly. Rarity's scent and presence were comforting, and Fluttershy's as well. Something about her was just an anchor, a rock in the emotional storm.
"Being a human wasn't this disorienting," Twilight said, frowning. Everyone was clustered around me now; their scents, their sounds, drove out others, reassuring me. I was in the herd and they would protect me. It's like this for them all the time, I realized, and I envied them that. I feel safer with them at my side, with Ivan accompanying me, when I'm human. But it's not like this.
"Oh, you've been experimenting?" Vanilla Surprise said cheerfully.
Twilight turned a little red. "I... umm..."
"She managed to plant her face in her bed and walk into a doorframe," Spike said gleefully.
"Planning to seduce Ivan? Or Marcus?" Vanilla Surprise teased her. "Or someone else? Don Diego, maybe? He is handsome."
She turned more red, and Big Macintosh said, "Enough," to Vanilla Surprise firmly.
She blinked, then got an odd smile. "As m'lord commands," she said teasingly.
Now he blinked.
"I just wanted... I was just curious... I mean..." Twilight became more frantic. I could see it, hear it, SMELL it. Fear does not smell very good, I will note; just smelling it made me nervous like I ought to be afraid too.
This was not an encouragement I needed.
"It's a natural curiosity," I said firmly to her. "I can show you the ropes some time, if you're still curious."
"Thank you," she said, still red.
I breathed in the scent of everyone, and out. It was reassuring.
I still felt kind of jumpy, especially if I thought about Rarity but I could function now. "Thank you everyone," I said softly. "I think I can try and dance now."
"Yeah," Applejack said approvingly. "You ain't got to be afraid of us."
"I know you now," I said softly. My brain could track their movements, by scent, smell, sound. Amazing.
There were still a lot of smells I didn't know. Though one of them, a very odd one, I thought was the pony DJ, who was now running the show and...
Octavia was up there with several other musicians, laying down something... not the usual music of the castle, though not entirely dissimilar; there was a pony with a trumpet, another with a clarinet, a piano player (who I think is also in the royal orchestra), and a drummer. The pony DJ was busy mixing their music with some recordings; it was eerie and powerful and... very danceable.
I relaxed a little more once we started dancing. A lot of pony dancing involves moving in sync with others, line dances or paired line dances. This was easier than it would have been for me as a human because I could see people to my left and right without needing to turn my head.
I was soon enjoying myself. While I was not as nimble as I am normally, the potion covered me well enough to let me do some fancy things with a little practice. As we were line dancing, with me next to Big Macintosh and Dr. Smith, and Vanilla Surprise, Rarity, and Ditzy opposite us, I wondered why Celestia had chosen to be an Earth Pony for the night. Maybe just not to be noticed, or to put Big Macintosh at ease.
I kicked forward with my right foreleg, then we all retreated four steps and kicked back, then strutted sideways twice, then kicked back again, forward, and raise hooves to touch, then start over again.
Rarity is a very beautiful pony; this was a fact of which I was keenly aware, whereas I normally only know this in an abstract way, the way you'd appreciate, say, a cat's beauty. I'd felt the same way when we were both humans, this same pounding in my veins and just loving to look at her.
To smell her.
Okay, that sounds freaky. But it's as natural for this body as looking is for me normally.
We switched into another dance in which the line of guys rotated, more or less, so you spent a short time with each of the women in the line. It was at this point, though, that I noticed Lyra was in the guy line. Then again, that way she and Bon-Bon get to dance together. When Bon-Bon and I came face to face, we reared and held each other up. Ponies can handle this better than a real pony could, but it's not easy. Unless you're Lyra or Pinkie, who seem quite nimble this way. Bon-Bon and I each had a foreleg around each other as we moved together.
She clearly wanted to ask me something, and I said softly to her, "It's very strange. You should ask Rarity about it."
She turned red. "Lyra really wants to try it some time," she mumbled.
"Lyra's always been fascinated by humans, though she never told me why," I said to Bon-Bon, then realized... I SHOULD NOT KNOW THAT. Dammit!
She looked at me curiously. "Is it that obvious?" she said, still embarrassed.
"Yes," I said softly. "Rarity does have two more candies."
Now she looked really nervous. We spun around now, nearly falling down. Without each other, we both would DEFINITELY fall down.
I could see Octavia; she was focused on her music, not us or Lyra. Good. I ought to do something but I don't have the leverage that Erik would have had.
The dance finished and I went to get some orange juice; my throat was dry and I am trying to avoid alcohol because if I get very drunk at all, I will likely start the apocalypse or try to... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Do not panic, do not panic! I focused on scarfing down orange juice through a straw. So tasty, and it smells so good.
Herr Otto said, "So why do you always glare at me?"
I half jumped out of my skin and then I somehow sucked the straw up my nose and fell down.
Where did he come from?
He had a brandy and he looked annoyed with me.
Had I been glaring? I tried not to glare.
"Wow, you are drunk," he said, then sipped more brandy. "Unlike myself."
I pulled the straw out and got a fresh one. "You just startled me," I told him. "And I do not glare at you all the time." I tried to avoid looking at him but I can't help it! I see anyone who isn't RIGHT behind me and I think turning my butt to him would likely come off as a duel challenge or something.
"I get enough of that crap from her relatives without getting it from some random... what the hell are you, anyway?" he said, frowning and sipping his drink.
"I am Samus Marcus, special agent of Celestia," I told him. "So her relatives know all about you?" I said.
"Our relationship is a secret, but I am around her enough for them to give me 'ugh, human' looks anyway."
I suspect it's not so secret as you think. "You're a brave man to risk Carnelia's wrath," I told him. "I heard her last boyfriend ran for the hills because Carnelia was planning to turn him into a turnip or something." I sipped my drink.
Otto's hand clenched around his glass. "If Erik of Vestland ever comes within sight of me, he will WISH I gave him to the Thyatians for 50,000 gold. Oh, he will PAY for running like a little coward."
I winced. Another person who wants me dead. "I heard they agreed it was best he go," I told Otto.
Otto got another drink and sipped it. "If he was a REAL MAN, he would have stayed and fought Carnelia. I've been trying to convince Carlotta to come to Aalban Prince Jagger has already agreed to protect her if Carnelia gets cranky. And Don Diego has agreed to help."
"He's a good father," I said somberly, then drank more orange juice.
"Yes, he is," Otto said to his glass. "So what's your beef with me? And are you a pony or a human?"
"I'm a crazy man in love," I said softly. "In way too deep. I can't believe it myself."
His glare softened. "If you're doing this for love, then I have to say you're head over heels." He looked across the room; Carlotta was dancing with some stallion. An Earth Pony. No one I know. "She still talks about him sometimes," he said in frustration and drank a little more brandy.
"That will pass. Old loves never fade entirely from the heart, especially not if you're parted by outside forces," I told him seriously. "But time will pass, her heart will heal and he'll only come up if someone else raises the topic."
"I hope so. I am sick of his ghost," Herr Otto said.
"Still learning Belcadizian dances?" I asked.
"Yes," he said, then sighed. "Our dances are rather different in Aalban"
I put my glass down. "Come on, I'll show you some of them."
"You are a pony," he said. "A *male* pony."
"Yes, everyone will stare at me and not notice you," I said, then dragged him onto the dance floor and began showing him some moves. It's the least I can do. Good luck, Otto. You're a braver man than me.
We did get a lot of stares. My telling him loudly how handsome he is probably didn't help but I couldn't help myself. I had to tease him a little, he's so SERIOUS all the time. Once I had him trained up some, I went to dance with Rarity for a while.
"Was that Herr Otto?" she asked curiously.
"I had to show him some Belcadizian dances," I told her, then swept her into a waltz. It was much harder with us as ponies, but I didn't care. Dancing with her was a delight.
I now went to dance with Twilight; she was smiling so brightly; it made me feel very happy. I could smell her happiness. And her personal scent, that kind of freshness after a storm. When the air is just so clean and purified.
Rarity smells like lilacs; I could smell her just a touch, knowing she'd passed through this space recently; I could feel people's past movements. Amazing.
"Having a good time?" she said hopefully.
"Much better than at the start," I told her. Twilight is quite lovely too. If we hadn't been drunk, if I hadn't panicked... would we be lovers?
But we're... I don't want to be a pony all the time and I'm sure neither of them would want to be human most of the time and people would think us very strange, and what would it even...
I shoved all that aside. Just enjoy the moment, dammit! No fear!
"So who was the pegasus?" I asked.
"West Wind. He's a courier," she told me. "He actually works for Franich House, of Darokin. They do a little of everything, especially banking. He runs back and forth between Canterlot and Darokin City with sensitive messages. He's had a few clashes with Toney House, which..."
"Which is their main rival for Darokin-Equestrian trade. Based in Akorros, they're well positioned to run goods through Stalliongrad or Fort Neigh into Equestria. There is in fact a Toney's Inn here in Canterlot." I went to a party there once as Erik.
She laughed softly. "So you know all about that."
From teaching Humanics, which needs a less stupid sounding name BADLY. "Yes," I told her. "We can discuss you dating Thutmose V, too, though I think you'd have to wear gloves on your date or he might give you mummy rot."
She laughed loudly; people stared but I didn't care as we spun around. "I have to remember that one. Spike, make a...Oh, no Spike," she said, embarrassed.
Spike was talking excitedly to the pony and human DJs, who looked intrigued. Okay, now I'm curious.
"Is there anything to date Thutmose with beyond that reference in... whatever that monument was... In Alphatia," I said, suddenly blanking.
"Coriolis III's comparison of himself to the glories of Thutmose V, who he said had lived a century earlier, on the Tepesti Monument, after his defeat of the Tepesti in 675 BC. There are three other references in Alphatian monuments to him, each of which is cryptic," Twilight said as we advanced, kicking with alternate legs.
Thutmose V was a great warrior Pharaoh of Nithia, who defeated the Grand Horde, a huge wave of humanoids that invaded during his hard to pin down reign. Apparently his grandson destroyed most of the record of him, THEN most of the knowledge of Nithia was lost when the Immortals destroyed it.
Then the music changed, and now Spike began to sing, backed by Octavia's band and some tracks laid down by the pony DJ, with the alchemist as his backup singer, along with some elf I hadn't seen before.
o/~ I never thought I could fall in love
o/~ Until I met the girl from the heavens above
o/~ I love the way she walks
o/~ I love the way she talks
o/~ Whenever she swishes her tail
o/~ I come running without fail.
Up to the last two lines, the alchemist, DJ Big D, had been singing along enthusiastically; he then realized Spike was singing about a pony. This caused him to falter. I know, I know, sir.
Spike is a good singer; the song was clearly improvised, but the band played well and Rarity now turned a little red. We all started dancing again and now I ended up paired with Dash. "You sing, right?" she said to me.
"People want me to sing more than I want to sing," I told Dash. "Sweetie's a better singer than I am."
"You totally have to sing Rarity a song," Dash said. "I'd... I'm no great singer, or I'd sing for Soarin'."
I can't do some big romantic gesture when I don't know whether we have a future or what I want or whether I am going to be killed if I tell her the things I have to tell her to even have any right to be her man.
"We can do it together," I said to her. "I'll panic and run otherwise." What? Damn you, mouth! What the hell are you doing without consulting the rest of my body and mind?
"Okay," she said. "Let's go get in line."
The pony turned out to be named DJ Pon3. She was happy to accommodate, so Dash and I huddled and laid our plan to go down in flames together.
I mean, sing.
************
I had just a little rum and... some sort of fruit thing. Just a single shot, which with my current mass, surely couldn't get me drunk but would hopefully melt my brain just that touch I need to avoid fleeing out the back door and just running until I fall off the cliff.
Then Dash and I got up with our hastily improvised song. I will note that Spike got a huge round of applause for his song; Twilight gave him a big pony hug, which he needed.
Just as we were about to start, Lyra came up with her harp and said to Octavia, "Please let me help my friends."
Octavia's glare softened. "Okay. This time."
Thanks, Octavia.
Who may, admittedly, just want a laugh at our expense.
I can't actually blame her for that.
So, here we go to sing. Of course we didn't bother to consult EITHER of the bards we know.
Dash went first.
o/~ I walked alone, needing no one
o/~ The sky was mine and that was all
o/~ Every day spent basking in the sun
o/~ I lived for me, until I heard your call.
I went second.
o/~ Always look forward; never look back
o/~ Everything broke, every time... I had to run
o/~ But for all my flight, I ran a well-beaten track.
o/~ Wrapped in shadow, no sight of the sun
Lyra to my surprise went third; Bon-Bon started at that, though she'd been watching us.
o/~ Keeping it light, keeping it breezy.
o/~ A wink, a smile, a kiss, a tumble in the hay
o/~ I would always take it easy.
o/~ And when it went wrong, I would always say...
The three of us now sang our chorus with Dash on the lead lines and Lyra and I following up.
o/~ When the going got tough,
o/~ We got going!
o/~ Someone else reaped the harvest
o/~ That we were sowing!
o/~ But that all changed when I saw you,
o/~ Now what the hell am I going to do?
And now we sang, parts changing, following some strange instinct, as if the song sang us and not the other way around.
o/~ I looked up to the sky (Dash)
o/~ And you crossed my horizon (Me, Lyra)
o/~ I looked down to the waters (Me)
o/~ And you rose from the deeps (Dash, Lyra)
o/~ I looked forward across the land (Lyra)
o/~ And you were looking back at me (Me,Dash)
o/~ And now when I look inside my mind (All)
o/~ It's your face I find (All)
Soarin' and Rarity were grinning like the cats who ate the canaries, while Bon-Bon was beet red; lots of people were staring at her in her rather simple green dress; she doesn't have big adventuring loot to spend on clothing. Rarity was busy showing off her dress to everyone who stared and Soarin' just hovered, looking pleased.
We now sang together, all three
o/~ I'm in deep
o/~ Way over my head
o/~ I can't run away
o/~ And I don't know how to stay
o/~ For whenever I yielded to desire,
o/~ It ended always in fire!
"In fire?" Rainbow Dash squeaked to me.
Lyra studied me curiously for a moment as she played.
I think that part came from me, yes, though we all sang it.
"Now you know why I'm so nervous," I whispered as Octavia and her band played a solo. Well, you can't call it a solo when it's the WHOLE BAND but they improvised a bridge while the three of us took a moment to breathe and drink something.
In retrospect, I am not actually sure where my drink came from but it was tasty and my throat needed some liquid refreshment.
Right as we were about to resume, Soarin' stepped up. DJ Pon3 manipulated her board and now a light shone brightly on him. He sang with a deeper voice than he speaks.
o~ Everyone loves the idea of me
o~ Everyone loves the ideal of me
o~ The dashing Wonderbolt above
o~ Who saves everyone.
o~ But they loved an idea, not a reality
o~ They didn't love *me*!
Dash stared with eyes wide; I get the feeling Soarin' doesn't talk too much about this frustration of his. She probably just learned tonight.
But now everyone knew. And he continued.
o~ You came into my life
o~ Like a bolt from the blue!
o~ You looked past my mask
o~ And saw my real face.
o~ And now there's nothing I won't do
o~ For a chance to be with you!
Rarity was next, stepping up beside him.
o~ I dreamed of a prince
o~ And a fairytale love.
o~ But my dreams were shattered
o~ When push came to shove.
o~ All my dreams and hopes
o~ Lay in ruins around me.
Damn you, Blueblood, I thought, as I watched, mesmerized. Rarity, it has to be said, knows how to work a crowd, her pose, her voice, her features perfect to convey her frustration. And then they turned to joy.
o~ It was the purest of chances
o~ Which brought us to these dances.
o~ In a land wilder than even the Everfree
o~ Covered in muck, you came to me
o~ I cleaned your face, you cleaned my heart
o~ And now I do hope, we never will part.
Twilight was smiling at us; I was in heaven and hell at once, in heaven from joy and in hell from guilt. But for now, I could shove hell to one side for a few minutes and enjoy the pounding in my chest, the thrill in my flesh, the song in my heart. Twilight was dancing with a unicorn now, his horn glowing though I wasn't sure what he was doing. But they were happy and that made me happy.
Celestia, I'm in love, and I don't know what to do. I can't go forward and I can't go back. I wanted to run to her and flee screaming into the night at once.
For now, I split the difference and stood still.
Vanilla Surprise was dancing with Big Macintosh, him lifting her up and spinning her; how he held on, I don't know. She was laughing and looked so happy, and I understood, this is the her she wishes she could be.
Heavy hangs the head which bears the crown.
I hope she can find some joy to live on, while this night lasts. But I think she will.
Ditzy was... dancing upside down, flying and hovering in reverse, as she danced with Dr. Smith. They were both laughing and enjoying themselves, though at times, I could see age in his eyes. Like me, I think he's seen too much death and it always haunts him a little.
Also, I wasn't COVERED in muck, I was just... okay, I was covered in muck.
Totally covered in muck.
Bon-Bon stepped up now and began to sing. She's got a good voice, but clearly not a lot of experience.
o~ My daily routine was a well trod rut;
o~ Get up in the morning and go to work,
o~ Go home in the evening and dream of the stars,
o~ Spend the weekend with Berry in bars.
o~ My life was quiet; in the shadows I would lurk
o~ For every door I wished to open remained shut.
In BARS??? Bon-Bon doesn't seem the type. I could only stare.
Twilight boggled too, which made me feel better.
o~ You sang to me as I always dreamed
o~ And swept me off my hooves
o~ I anchor you; you set me free
o~ Together, I hope we'll aways be
o~ Teach me to roam; I will teach you to stay
o~ And shoulder to shoulder, we'll say...
And now the three of them moved shoulder to shoulder... more or less,since Soarin' still hovered.
And now the entire club burst into song as the band played on.
o~ If I fly to the sky (mostly men)
o~ I will be your sun (mostly women)
o~ When I plunge to the depths (mostly men)
o~ I will be your moon (mostly women)
o~ When I run to far horizons (mostly men)
o~ I will run by your side (mostly women)
DJ Big D was crying for some reason as he listened to us all sing. I'm not sure why, given this was a HAPPY song. Even the humans and elves were singing now and dancing. DJ Pon3 now rose up and grabbed DJ Big D and forced him to dance, and I couldn't help but laugh at the sight.
o~ Across the sky (Dash)
o~ We'll fly together (Soarin')
o~ In deepest dungeon (Me)
o~ We'll explore together (Rarity)
o/~ In all the tides of normal life (Lyra)
o~ We'll stand together (Bon-Bon)
o~ Adventure we will seek together, (all)
o~ Together we will make a home (all)
o~ For you are the one I love. (All)
The note hung high and clear, and then one by one the instruments went silent until only Lyra's lute and Octavia's double-bass remained, playing on, a voiceless duet, playing through verse and chorus until it faded.
Then Lyra bowed before Octavia. "I am sorry," Lyra said to Octavia. "You can beat me unconscious with your double-bass if you want. You told me you loved me and I fled in a panic because I couldn't stay and I couldn't go but I *could* run screaming and never come back. So I did."
Eeeeeeee.
I heard Twilight's breath catch. Obviously enough.
I didn't know what to do either, but I DID know how to run, screaming. So I did too. (Back then, I mean.)
"I'm not going to beat you unconscious with my double-bass," Octavia said.
Lyra gave a deep sigh of relief.
"It's too expensive to break when I can just use this table!," Octavia said angrily, hefting a nearby table over her head and rearing back on her hind legs. DJ Pon3's music collection took to the air now and she ran around catching it with her magic; some of it fell on DJ Big D's head, knocking him down.
Twilight strode up and wrestled with Octavia for control of the table. "That's enough! She just panicked and ran away! People get scared sometimes when it comes to love!" Her voice was half angry and half pleading. "You have the right to be angry, but you shouldn't just hit her!"
I understand how Lyra feels. She wants to make it up to Octavia, to the extent she can. She screwed up and she regrets it and she wants to atone.
I could see Vanilla Surprise and Lunette both watching this intently. Dash and Soarin' were kissing; they'd flown to each other the second the song ended and probably hadn't even NOTICED all this.
And Rarity was now at my side as I watched this drama, nuzzling me and I nuzzled back and wished that we had, in fact, proper arms.
"She deserves punishment!" Octavia said. "I opened my heart to her and she stomped on it!" She was quite angry. The table wobbled. Earth Ponies are STRONG, or she could never have fought Twilight like that.
"Put that table down!" Bon-Bon said angrily, charging up. Seeing her pawing the ground was just... it was like... I don't know. Seeing Twist prepare to rage, maybe.
"A table is too far," Rarity said softly to me. "But she deserves some kind of punishment."
I nodded, damning myself. But I just... I am dreading atonement but I really... I don't want to walk scott free.
I fear Twilight will just... I don't even know what she'll do. But it's clear it won't involve demanding I die.
Which would be easier than too much forgiveness.
Pinkie now strode up into the confrontation. "Stop! Ponies shouldn't fight each other! I have a better solution, an equitable punishment!"
Octavia studied her curiously. "Who are you?"
"I am Pinkie Pie, the Element of Laughter! But today, I am... THE ELEMENT OF JUSTICE!" She reared up on her hind legs and stretched her forelegs, then spun on one hoof and fell down. This sparked widespread laughter. "By the power invested in me by Celestia herself, I do hereby sentence Lyra to be Octavia's roadie for the next two weeks! To clean her instruments and those of her band, to set up their equipment and to generally do scutwork until she needs a ponicure AND CANNOT GET ONE."
"It's a fair cop," Lyra said. She looked at Octavia.
"I'll accept that," Octavia said, putting the table down. "You can start by cleaning up my mess."
"I don't want my girlfriend spending all her time with her ex," Bon-Bon said, frowning at all and sundry.
"She has to atone for her past errors," Pinkie said. "Don't worry, Bon-Bon, I'll keep you busy. And it won't take ALL her time. But it has to be enough so they can make up and move on. You don't want Lyra to still be worrying about Octavia when she's with you, right?"
Bon-Bon had the look of someone defeated by logic but not persuaded in the heart. "Fine." She sagged.
Octavia just sniffed at her and now talked quietly to her band to get the party started again.
Sorry, Bon-Bon. But I think things will go better for you once Lyra no longer has that shadow of past failure hanging over her. Pinkie, I'd give you a thumbs up if I actually had any thumbs right now.
I wished again I had a proper arm to put around Rarity, though standing next to her is nice. "Let's dance," I told her, once the music started and we smiled at each other and began to dance.
Is this love? It certainly feels different when we're both the same species. I greatly enjoy her company when we're together, but like this.. when she was human... Can we really do this?
I have to tell her before we get too deep.
Later, when we have privacy.
Everyone's smiling at us. I feel so good. I wish I could feel this good forever.
For a little while, at least, I did.
**************
My joy lasted until I noticed Spike busy stuffing donuts in his mouth in frustration and swilling... something. Coffee, I think. Sweet mother of Valerias, he is going to bounce off the walls for hours. Then he will crash and then he will hate everything for days.
Rarity was dancing with Big Macintosh, so I went to talk to Twilight, who had just finished dancing with a unicorn. "I have extremely horribly bad news for you," I told her.
"What's wrong?" she asked, eyes wide.
I pointed at Spike and she vibrated. "You'd better lock your doors tight tonight."
"I know," I told her. "And you'd better borrow a sleeping potion because he is not going to sleep until maybe noon tomorrow."
She sighed. "Thanks for the warning. So..." She licked her lips nervously. "So this means you and Rarity are... a couple, right?" she said hesitantly.
Aaargh, I need to talk to Rarity. I want her so much like this, it's so... I haven't felt like this since Dona Carlotta and I were together. But we won't both be the same most of the time. There's magic and things but... I don't know what to do, what to say.
I just know I'm in love with her and it terrifies me.
"I am in love with her and scared out of my mind," I confessed, then cursed my lips for giving away secrets.
"I know, I totally know," Twilight said sympathetically, patting my back. I dipped her low and we nearly fell down. I should stop trying to do that in a pony body but my human dancing instincts are still there. "Man, this is fun but tiring."
"A Pony burns four times as much energy when bipedal as quadrupedal," Twilight told me as we danced like humans, leaning on each other, forehooves around each other, trying to waltz. "Humanoids don't suffer this because they're designed to move more efficiently. And we Ponies can only do this thanks to the Blackmoorians."
"So do Ponies who want to lose weight go around bipedal as much as possible?" I asked.
"It helps to explain why Pinkie can eat so much sugar and remain healthy," Twilight said.
I wonder if... Lyra is dating a candy maker.
That explains a lot.
"Anyway, I... well, I had this problem too. When I had my big crush on Erik." She sighed. "I don't even... I mean, I think he would have been willing to do what you're doing, and I was busy practicing to surprise him with turning human when I ended up confessing to him before I was even ready." She laughed nervously. "Rarity and I have been discussing this some."
"I don't know what we'll do long term," I told Twilight. "I like being human, she likes being a pony. Though being a unicorn helps. I think I would be pretty frustrated if I had to do it all earth pony style without any magic. There's a ton of issues and people will freak and I don't even... have you met her parents?"
"Silver Belle is very nice but somewhat... you know how Rarity is with gems?" Twilight asked.
"Yes," I said.
"She's that way with cloth and sewing. She was hugging a bolt of expensive cloth when I met her," Twilight said, laughing.
I now tried spinning her around. We crashed into another couple and I had to apologize.
"Captain Keen Eyes is brave and strong, but kind of stern and stubborn and unyielding," Twilight said. "And he really dislikes Fluttershy because she's not as brave as him."
I grimaced; I'd hoped that might have been just... something not true. "So I'm toast."
"You're not..." She winced. "Maybe."
Where maybe = hell yeah.
Dammit. I want to ask what her long term plans were, but really, I ought to just confess everything to her right now.
But I just can't do it.
I WILL do it with Rarity if it kills me.
It will.
"I will tell him all about how you got hurt protecting Rarity and how much you love her and how much you did to help us and I'm sure he'll come around." Twilight looked very worried. This added to my guilt-mountain.
I'm not so sure, he's a hardass.
We finished the dance and now Lunette stole me. "So she's the one," Lunette said softly.
"I have no clue what... how... I mean, I have no experience at this," I said, half babbling as we danced. Spinning her was MUCH safer than trying to spin Twilight.
"Good luck," Lunette said. "As an Immortal, with time, such body issues are less worrisome. But I still remember when I was a... well a sort of normal pony." She smiled. "Being the child of an Immortal, I was never entirely normal." We swung into a box step, making a series of three-steps and turning a quarter turn by the end of each, eventually returning to our start. "And one day, both of you may join our ranks."
My eyes widened a little. "So I was right. You hope for all of them to Ascend."
She touched my mind as I dipped her low. Somehow, I was much more agile while holding her than I had been with Twilight. 'Yes. We have huge plans, much of which I cannot yet tell you.'
'Until I show I can be trusted,' I told her. 'I understand.' I had a weird feeling and I was not sure what it was. We swung out beside each other and strutted forward, then came back together and reversed on the quick-step. With her, I could dance as nimbly as my human body, though it still tired me more.
'We are still trying to figure out if you will need to start over or if we can move you forward from where you are,' Lunette said. 'Come to my lab after lunch tomorrow, so I can study you, please.'
We darted nimbly through the crowd; some people were staring now, swinging around people and moving with more grace than even my human body normally has. It felt like anything was possible. 'Of course,' I told her. 'I don't even remember now why I wanted it.'
'Do you wish it still?' she asked. 'It is a burden as well as a blessing.'
'If Ivan is going to do it, and Rarity as well, then most definitely.' Assuming we all can; it is, after all, a rare and difficult thing. 'I'd jump into the Hell of the Five Fiends for Ivan and Helga,' I told her. 'And now... if Rarity and I can make it work, I will want to be by her side. And I owe Twilight.' And the others, but I owe Twilight the most. 'Also, do you know anything about making magical items? I want to make Applejack the best lasso ever, since she saved my life.'
She spun me now and I laughed and then she pulled me back in close. 'I would be glad to help you; Twilight and Rarity can help you as well. Applejack could, but I assume it needs to be a surprise.'
I nodded to her.
We dipped low and then the music finished. 'Good luck. We can talk more about shifting in my lab and the issues of bodies,' Luna said to me.
"Thank you for the dance, fair elven lady," I said bowing.
She smiled impishly. "Thank you, good sir. I believe your lady fair awaits you."
"Oh yes," I said and ran to her eagerly to dance again.
************
We danced a while, then took a break to drink some orange juice. I tried to avoid alcohol. So I can't do anything TOO foolish.
And then we kissed. I had not planned it... it just kind of happened. We were smiling and then we were closer and then... smooch. And my body went 'NOW NOW NOW' and I had to tell it to SHUT UP.
And then we heard a kind of strangled cry nearby. We both froze and looked but while we saw the bartender and three other ponies all looking around, we saw nothing.
When it didn't repeat, I said, "We have to talk tonight, once we're home and safe."
She nodded. "Agreed. We should..." And then, suddenly, Scootaloo came from nowhere, wearing a black hat, eye mask, her CMC cloak, a black coat, black trousers, the whole Manuel of the Plains imitator kit. She grabbed Rarity and dragged her off.
"Come and dance with me fair lady!"
Rarity flailed and got pushed along by the sheer force of Scootaloo's will. "Who are you!" she said.
DO NOT TELL ME YOU CANNOT TELL!!!!
Then Apple Bloom and Sweetie manhandled me along; Apple Bloom's prehensile tail was a huge help to her. "You filthy girlfriend stealer! The Plains Crusaders will not allow this!" They too had the full Manuel monte.
WHAT ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT?
I ended up in some sort of side room with them. Dinky was sitting on a table and Don Diego sat next to her, legs over the edge. Oh, I mean 'Manuel' sat there.
"Good sir, I apologize for the roughness of my apprentices, but they and I cannot allow you to muscle in on someone already pledged to someone else!" he said. "For I am Manuel of the Plains, defender of justice AND love!"
DON DIEGO!
Why don't they recogn.. OH!
I felt the stupidest of all men. Of all POSSIBLE men.
"You had better RUN," Sweetie said, poking my right foreleg with a deck of cards. She shuffled the deck. "Draw a card!"
I drew the card. The Jack of Shadows. "Okay," I said.
"It's the JACK OF SHADOWS, right?" she said angrily.
"Yes," I said, showing the card.
"That means if you don't STAY AWAY FROM MY SISTER, her boyfriend will EAT YOUR SOUL," Sweetie said.
"He'll boil you in a pot!" Apple Bloom said, jumping up and down and making kung-fu moves.
"He will make you do all his homework!" Dinky said mournfully.
Twist stuck her head in. "I can't find him anywhere! But he might be in the men's room, where I can't go." She frowned. "I sold a lot of candy, but that's just a cover."
"Did my lemon candy sell?" Apple Bloom asked.
"They LOVED it," Twist said.
"Tell me you were not selling shapeshifting candies," I said.
"No, no, I did make a big batch for emergencies, but I know better than to sell it to people who don't know what it is," Twist said.
I HOPE SO.
"Why do you have a bunch of shapeshifting candies?" I asked.
"That's not your business, you GIRLFRIEND STEALER," Sweetie said, jabbing my leg with the Jack of Shadows. "Go back to the Abyss!"
"I will check the men's room," Don Diego said and headed out. I mean 'Manuel' headed out.
"I wonder if I can get a Cutie Mark by beating down a GIRLFRIEND STEALER," Apple Bloom said thoughtfully.
"I am not a girlfriend stealer," I told them. "I guess you do have some excuse for not recognizing me."
"You're not my brother, right?" Apple Bloom said weakly. "You don't look right but I know he's in a suit."
"Sweetie, I'm disappointed you don't know me," I told her, trying to sound VERY sad.
She froze. "I... ummm..."
"Did you bring those to turn Rarity's boyfriend into a pony without asking him?" I said sternly.
"I... no... maybe... YES," Sweetie said. "I'm sure... I mean... It was Scootaloo's idea!" She sounded guilty.
"You totally wanted him to be a pony," Twist said, waggling a hoof at her. "I was the one who thought this was a bad idea."
"But you went along anyway," Apple Bloom said, pointing at her, looking aggravated.
"I just want to ensure he and Rarity are happy together and that he doesn't... I want him to stay," Sweetie said weakly to the floor. "He's very kind to me and I like my big brother very much."
"Sweetie, it's me, Marcus. Rarity got some of the candy and we each are trying it tonight. She was human earlier, and now I'm a pony."
They all stared, eyes wide at me.
Distantly, I heard Rarity chewing out Scootaloo and so was Applejack. I smiled at that a little.
"You should NEVER EVER shapeshift someone against their will unless they're trying to hurt you," I told them.
Sweetie began crying and crumpled in a ball. "I'm so sorry, I just wanted you and Rarity and I to be happy forever!"
"Nothing lasts forever, my little pony," I told her kindly. "I know you meant well." I lowered myself gingerly and nuzzled her gently. I am aware that horse legs are not as tough as they may look.
"I'm sorry."
"Sorry isn't enough. If you're really sorry, you'll do something to make up for what you did." I looked at all of them. "If you want to be treated like big ponies, you have to act like big ponies."
And yes, I know, I am the pot, blah blah. I'm going to have to make amends too. But Lyra did it and I can too.
"We just wanted to help and get our matchmaking cutie marks," Apple Bloom grumbled.
Rarity and Applejack herded Scootaloo in. "Marcus, what's going on?" Rarity asked.
"It's the Cutie Mark Crusaders in disguise. They wanted to 'help' us."
Sweetie cringed.
Applejack laughed. "Didn't recognize him, kids?"
"Wait, these are Sweetie's friends?" Rarity said.
Applejack looked at me and we just shook our heads. Applejack pulled off Sweetie's mask.
"Sweetie!" Rarity said in shock.
There must be something wrong with pony vision. Or something.
I can still tell though things are kind of weirdly flatter than I would expect.
"I'm so sorry, I just wanted to help!"
"It's okay," Rarity said. "Nothing got messed up, did it?"
"They were going to turn me into a pony with the candy," I told Rarity.
"I guess Pinkie kept her promise to tell no one," Rarity said.
"I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you!" Sweetie said urgently.
"Don Diego is supposed to be watching over you all," Rarity said sternly. "Where is he?"
"Bathroom," Apple Bloom said.
"We'll discuss a penance for you later," I said, then paused. "If that's okay," I said to Rarity.
"Yes, it will wait. Just be careful with that candy," Rarity said.
Applejack looked thoughtful. "I reckon maybe I ought to give it a try some time. I'm a mite curious."
"Some time when we have clothing for you to wear," Rarity said.
"I guess everything you've got on you would be kinda frou-frou," Applejack said.
"Give us a candy," Rarity said to Twist. "Applejack, we'll see if we can work you out an outfit you can accept. Marcus, darling, can you take the kids?"
"Yes," I said. "Everyone stay close to me." I paused, then walked over to Rarity. "Close your eyes."
She closed her eyes and I kissed her. Applejack was grinning and Sweetie cheered.
SHUT UP BODY.
KIDS PRESENT!!!!!!
Rarity smiled brightly. "Thank you, darling. Close the door on the way out, so no one sees us." She turned to Applejack. "Let's see, gold coat, so something purple, maybe."
"Everyone in this place has already seen me NAKED," Applejack said as we went out, closing the door behind us.
"Now what?" Scootaloo asked, frowning.
"We turn you into a giant chicken as your punishment," I said cheerfully.
She stared in absolute horror.
Don Diego, you SUCK as a babysitter. But I knew you would and didn't stop it.
Damn me.
"Oh man, that's awful," Apple Bloom said.
I found Fluttershy and Pinkie, about to sing a song about animals. Fluttershy looked very nervous. "Hey, look, the kids snuck here to try to help us."
"We were hoping for our way overdue Cutie Marks!" Scootaloo said.
"They were going to shapeshift me into a pony," I told them.
"But you are a pony," Pinkie said, rubbing her eyes.
"You can turn me into a pony," Fluttershy said kindly.
"Are you mocking me?" Scootaloo said, clearly frustrated.
"Yeah, Fluttersarcasm!," Pinkie said, hugging her. "A good start!"
"I was hoping I'd look different, so no one would recognize me," Fluttershy said weakly.
Twist offered her a candy. She ate it eagerly and suddenly changed shape, looking just like Twilight.
"Isn't she famous?" I asked.
"I... not like I was," Fluttershy said nervously. "I could just read a book quietly for the rest of the night if I'm Twilight."
"You are going to have FUN," Pinkie said. "Crusaders! Your new mission is FLUTTERFUN!"
"FLUTTERFUN! YAY!" they all shouted, then ran around us in a circle, singing and dancing about how much fun Fluttershy would have tonight.
She smiled brightly, though she looked a little embarrassed. "Thank you, fillies," she said.
That's when suddenly there was a huge puff of smoke and the sound of Fluttershy shrieking and then when it cleared, a man in dark green robes was flying towards the door on a purple disk with a squirming sack over one shoulder. "This should be enough bait!" he said proudly.
"Fillies, go stay by Lyra and do NOT come outside," I said sternly, knowing they would not obey.
Dammit.
Pinkie was already after the man and I could see the rest of our friends starting to move. "Sweetie, go make sure your sister and Applejack know they're needed."
"You can trust in me!" she said and ran. The others ran over to Lyra and I ran for the door.
**************
The first sign this was going to be bad was that the sausage-seller had turned to stone. The second sign was that there were ponies running amok in the streets, singing, babbling, kicking things down, kicking each other, chasing humans and so on. The third sign was the giant floating armored eyeball with a dozen eyestalks floating in the street with a cackling wizard in dark green robes, floating on a purple disk above the beholder and brandishing a staff. He had red hair and dusky skin and his eyes were made of flame. Clearly Flaemish, from Bergdhovern in Glantri. The Flaems and Alphatians used to live on a planet on another plane, but they kind of blew it up when an intellectual debate got out of hand.
I wish that was a joke.
This sort of thing is why wizards are usually not invited to rule your country.
Pinkie shouted, "Give us back Twilight, or I won't make you laugh AT ALL!"
Thanks, Pinkie, that will make them fear us.
"I told you she would be here, and where SHE is, we'll find him too!" the wizard cackled.
I now recognized the beholder. He's the bastard who nailed me with a fear ray, so I fell out a window, down a slope, then off a small cliff. Thank the Immortals for Clerics, or I'd still be in a hospital bed.
For reasons STILL inadequately explained, he was cruising around high up in the sky, making us think we'd found a new planet. Thanks to the Grand Galloping Gala, no one noticed him but us. Then Twilight's effort to boost the power of the telescope drew his attention and we had a running battle that ended with Twilight having a freakout and sending him to another plane.
I don't even know this bastard's name but I can still remember how I screamed as I fell.
"Who the hell are you?" I shouted.
"I am Cortland Van Der Bijl," the wizard said proudly. "A graduate with GD from the Great School of Magic, well versed in all things elemental, with minors in aberrations and flight magics! I'm here for the bounty on Erik of Vestland's head!"
"I am Extaferous the All-Powerful," the beholder said solemnly. "I have come to DESTROY Twilight Sparkle and Erik of Vestland! But especially Twilight Sparkle!"
"Twilight Sparkle. HAH, she went in my magic bag like a helpless ferret! And I'm here for the bounty on Erik's head!" Cortland said, cackling. "Better run, you stupid stallion, or you're going to become a snack for Extaferous!"
I heard FlutterLight (polymorphed Fluttershy) say something about ferrets but it was muffled.
Shouldn't the royal...
I now spotted a lance of stoned warponies. (Namely, ten of them.) Okay, so much for the first guard response.
But if we keep them busy long enough for the others to arrive...
Especially given Twilight, Luna and Celestia are inside... BWAHAHAH! They won't know what hit them.
Pinkie and I just have to hold off a mad wizard mercenary and a beholder.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
"Marcus, I have a plan," Pinkie whispered. "But it involves a pie too big for me to pick up, so I haven't quite figured out how to make it work."
How does she have it if she can't pick it up?
"Go on," I said, since I really have no better idea.
"ERIK OF VESTLAND! COME OUT OR TWILIGHT SPARKLE GETS IT! WE KNOW SHE'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND!" Cortland shouted.
"..." I stared.
Flutterlight said something incoherent and weakly pushed at the bag. This is not the time for you to be doing your usual feigning weakness, Fluttershy!
"You use your magic, I use muscle and together we heft and fling it," she said.
It beats nothing; apparently he fears us so little, the beholder can't even be bothered to zap us.
We managed to get the pie out and hit the beholder in its central giant eye.
For a moment, there was a terrible silence.
Then the beholder shot me with the fear ray. Nothing happened. If anything, I felt a little less terrified.
"..." Damn you, universe, for being ironic.
Damn you.
It tried to zap us with its anti-magic ray but the pie smeared on its eye blocked it. It began trying to set us on fire and suck out our life force and we began dodging wildly while I tried to get the peace I needed for a few seconds to cast a spell.
No dice. The beholder now focused on Pinkie while the wizard hurled wind blasts and fire at me. Pinkie hurled pastries, blocking each shot, while performing an impromptu rap about how she is the Queen of Pastries and you must respect her attitude or something.
So it rotated to fire ALL of its eyestalks at once at her.
Pinkie froze in panic, but then....
DASH!
SWOOSH, she was zoomed up into the air and a large chunk of street blew up, froze, got hypnotized, had its life sucked, turned to stone, etc.
Further, an arrow now shot through the drawstrings of the bag; it fell off the disk and open and FlutterLight flew out of it. Then lightning balls engulfed the wizard, knocking him for a loop into the building. Twilight and Rarity were on the scene.
Then Big Mac and Applejack (now wearing a fancy dress, her hair piled up in a bun... with her hat on it... ) ran out and leaped up ONTO the beholder and began tying up its eyestalks, kicking them out of the way when it began to try to zap them.
Lunette, Vanilla Surprise, and Ivan now came out the door and studied the scene. Soarin' charged out behind them to assess the situation, and then Dr. Smith and Ditzy ran out as well.
"Boyz! Strike! Elemental Boyz! STRIKE!" Cortland shouted.
Four elementals shimmered into existence. A humanoid giant made of fire, a whirling vortex of water, a huge floating cloud with lightning, and a rocky giant. Further, eight Diamond Dogs now charged out, wearing armor and carrying spears to move against us.
Oh boy.
Cortland now stared at Flutterlight and Twilight. He blinked. "What on earth?"
Flutterlight began speaking in some unearthly, echoing tongue. I stared at her. The floating cloud began thundering at her and the other elementals made weird noises. This led Cortland to make the same kind of noises. Oh hoh, don't mess with the DRUID.
Dr. Smith said, "Ditzy, we need a good fog."
"Ditzy is on it!" she said proudly then flew at the Diamond Dogs and fog spread from her wings, rolling over them and they now ran around lost in it. I could feel her Cutie Mark pulsing with power.
Now I could see something coming, a kind of huge iron bird coming down from high above. That doesn't bode well; I could see Pegasi guards rising from the castle to approach it.
"Dash, Soarin', bring me Pinkie and check out the bird!" Twilight shouted. "Marcus, rally to me. Ivan, conceal yourself. Lunette, go with Ivan. Vanilla Surprise, work with Pinkie. Rarity, let me enchant one of your arrows, then ready it." I wondered idly if she thought about how she was ORDERING THE PRINCESSES AROUND.
Probably not, and they did what she said.
Ivan and Lunette seemed to turn into shadows and vanish into the darkness of the night. "..." I stared at that. Ivan couldn't ALWAYS do that, right?
Dash deposited Pinkie by Vanilla Surprise; they began conferring and trading pastries as Dash rose skywards with Soarin'.
Dr. Smith ambled over to FlutterLight and joined in the conversation, gesticulating with one hoof and speaking the strange, unearthly mix of crackles and thunders and echoes and breezes and scents that FlutterLight and Cortland spoke fluently.
Damn, I really need to study more.
A lot more.
I could see the Pegasi circling the iron bird; Blue Angel was up there, busy talking to them.
Ditzy continued to circle, keeping the fog going, her victims trapped inside it as she said to them, "Don't worry, this is perfectly safe, as long as you wore nice warm clothing and that armor looks warm! But now you can't hurt anyone! So just lie down and take a nice nap!" She sounded very cheerful.
The beholder was now hog-tied in terms of its eyestalks but it now began trying to scrape the pie off using the road without hitting its eye's... surface, I guess is the right word. However, Applejack and Big Macintosh now leaped off and began running down the road, dragging it behind them, bouncing up and down as it howled.
Twilight worked on enchanting Rarity's arrows with some tricks while I helped her. Pinkie and Vanilla Surprise began a song and dance routine, cheering FlutterLight on, which seemed to make her more confident as she argued. Dr. Smith's right hoof kept tapping the tune, I noticed and smiled.
And then there was a flash of light and sixteen Giff appeared. They're basically Hippo-men who live in outer space, flying around in techno-magical ships like... the iron bird. "We represent the Interdimensional Police," the commander said. "I'm Commander Wild Assault." He wore a blue uniform and had a monocle. They all had these odd curved wands at their hips.
His second in command, who wore a pith helmet with a green uniform, read off a list. "We're here to arrest Interdimensional Criminals Twilight Sparkle and Erik of Vestland for dumping a beholder, hight Extaferous the All-Powerful, on Dimension X-53-AR, known also as 'Karinth'. Erik of Vestland is also charged with being a 'candy-ass bastard, Class IV' and Twilight Sparkle with 'Unregistered Cosmic Power, Class II'."
"I am registered in Equestria!" Twilight said, pulling out her paperwork.
"Okay, we'll dismiss the lesser charge," Commander Wild Assault said, gesturing to his flunky, who scratched it out. "Where is your partner in..." He paused and saw FlutterLight. "What the hell is this?"
"One Twilight was not enough," I said. "We had to have as many as possible." I could not help but grin.
"Now she can read THREE books at the same time!" Pinkie said, then laughed.
"There are no Interdimensional Police," Vanilla Surprise said. "Just be honest and admit you're here for the bounty."
"We would not stoop to simple bounty hunting, whatever our financial crisis!" Commander Wild Assault insisted. "That, madam, is LIBEL, which is a crime! Take her in too!"
I looked at Vanilla Surprise, who mouthed 'go hog wild' at me.
That's a royal command I can live with.
Then the second in command pointed at Ditzy. "Sir, it's Derpy Hooves."
Who?
He froze. "There's a five million gold bounty on her."
WHAT? Why the hell would anyone in their right mind put that much money on ANYONE?
"She may have her sidekick; he's worth five hundred thousand gold," the second in command continued.
Dr. Smith paused in the negotiations. "Sidekick?" he said, sounding hurt and offended. "I think you are confused."
"Nope, you're the sidekick," the second in command Giff said, ticking off a box.
"Hell, let's take them all; I'm sure they're all worth something," the commander said.
"Ditzy," Dr. Smith said to her. "You're going to have to use the explosives I told you not to bring."
"But you said not to bring them, so I didn't," Derpy said.
He blinked. "But you always forget when I tell you not to bring them!"
"So I made a DOZEN notes and Dinky made ten and I got the staff to paint it on the wall of my room, so I remembered!" Ditzy said proudly. "I'm buying paint when I get home!"
Dr. Smith made a strangled noise.
Ditzy flew around, looking proud, even as the Giff started to surge forwards; she was still keeping the now groggy and confused and cold Diamond Dogs trapped.
"I've got explosives!" Twist said, appearing next to Dr. Smith.
Oh bloody hell.
Wait, SHE HAS EXPLOSIVES?
"I brought my SUPER red-hots! They detonate in your mouth in a FLAVOR EXPLOSION," Twist said proudly.
"It will have to do; pass them to Ditzy," Dr. Smith said wearily. "Muffin Bomber time with candy, Ditzy."
"..." I stared, then turned my attention to the Giff.
"If there are any more hidden children, they'd best get BACK INSIDE!" Twilight shouted.
"I came to tell you there are trolls inside trying to kidnap Lyra!" Twist said.
Oh bloody hell.
How did TROLLS get into the middle of Canterlot???
Dr. Smith twitched. "Do they have metal body parts?"
"Yep!"
Not good at all, even if I don't know WHY. But I had other things on my mind.
Team Equestria had Vanilla Surprise, Lunette, Twilight, Pinkie, myself, and Rarity. And you could count Twist, I suppose. And Ditzy, who may actually be 'Derpy Hooves', whatever that is about. Dr. Smith and FlutterLight were busy negotiating with elementals, though that seemed headed for a close. They were also keeping Cortland out of this and Dinky had the Diamond Dogs pinned.
So we had two God-Ponies in disguise and possibly not at full power, three ponies, and me. And Twist. Our foes: sixteen Giff. Bloody hell.
Our four best fighters are either up in the air, now fighting the iron bird, or dragging a Beholder.
Twilight now cast Mass Enlargement. This made us all bigger than Celestia's normal form, which is BIG. I then cast the fly spell from my feather, on Twilight; the wings produced, to my surprise and apparently to HER surprise, were huge wings of purple flame. The Giff now hesitated, staring at her.
"Beware, the true form of Princess Twilight Sparkle, Defender of Equestria, IS NOW REVEALED!" Vanilla Surprise shouted. Pinkie, Rarity, and Twist's breath caught. Twilight turned a little red.
"Run with it, it'll give us the edge," I whispered to them.
Twilight's eyes turned firey now; I felt the spell. Her voice echoed. "I AM TWILIGHT SPARKLE, MISTRESS OF THE STARS ABOVE! WHO ARE YOU WHO INVADES MY LAND OF EQUESTRIA???"
Ponies everywhere who had been staring or running amok in a panic now stopped and stared at her.
"Beam us up," the Giff leader said to a box in his hand.
High above I heard a noise like a pony going through a metal wing at high speed. No escape for you, Commander Wild Assault.
"Blast them!" Commander Wild Assault shouted. His men pulled their wands. Lightning wands! We all dodged wildly as they began blasting around.
As they did this, Dr. Smith jumped up onto the head of the Earth Elemental. The Fire and Water Elementals moved over by Cortland and the Air Elemental now let Fluttershy hop onto it. Then the four elementals started fighting with encouragement and orders from the three mortals.
"Do we really have to do this?" Dr. Smith said sadly to Cortland.
"You idiots are in the way of MY MONEY," Cortland said. "Plus, if you two are worth millions of gold in bounties, then this is EVEN BETTER."
Fluttershy threw seeds on the ground, then gently bounced up and down; her elemental began to rain down on the seeds.
Cortland stared. "You can't get RAIN from an air elemental!" Then he gestured and the water elemental rushed at her, forcing her back; it thoroughly soaked the seeds as it did so. The fire elemental came at Dr. Smith and the Earth Elemental; he fumbled at his saddlebags as the two elementals fought.
Meanwhile Derpy and Twist were...loading the candy into bubbles. Soon a swarm of bubbles floated around Derpy, each holding a candy, as four Giff shot at her. She and her bubbles dodged, then she flew down, dropping candy into the mouths of two; it detonated and they stumbled, then she swooped up with her bubbles.
Remind me NOT to try that flavor. The fact that Twist was laughing with excitement did not help.
Twelve Giff rushed at myself, Vanilla Surprise, Twilight, Pinkie, and Rarity. All of us were now HUGE. Four of them (including Commander Wild Assault) shot at Twilight; she fired lightning balls and blocked every shot with ease. Two more attacked Rarity who shot their weapons out of their hands, while dodging the lightning. Two came at Vanilla Surprise; she hit one in the face with a pie, then kicked the other one down. Then she got zapped with lightning and went flying to my TOTAL SHOCK. I guess this is NOT one of Celestia's more potent forms. Pinkie on the other hand, now dodged lightning and sang about how lightning never strikes the same place twice. Then she ran between her foes and they shot each other.
Two of them began chasing me around; I couldn't dodge well enough to make a counter attack to my frustration. Then Ivan and Lunette formed out of shadow, each armed with a hammer. Whelm sent Ivan's foe tumbling down the street and Lunette grabbed said foe's lightning wand as she knocked down her own foe and then she blasted them.
The Diamond Dogs stumbled, tired and cold, out of the mist, then began looking around. Dammit!
And then I heard the sound of MANY clattering hooves coming our way. Distantly, I could see Magnus being chased by a force of City Watch Ponies. He was headed our way full tilt.
Twilight saw Vanilla Surprise go flying and her eyes widened and then she shouted angrily. A huge wave of water rushed at the two Giff who had blasted Vanilla Surprise; they tried to shoot at her but the water caught their lightning and now they were trapped in it, tumbling along, being zapped.
High above, I could see Celestia's Pegasi forces forcing the iron bird towards a landing at the royal airfield, one of its wings crippled. One less worry.
Ivan and I charged the two who Rarity was dueling and drove them off her. This freed her up to fire an arrow at Commander Wild Assault; the arrow now exploded in a cloud of gas; he inhaled it and fell down. Lunette then slipped behind the two we were fighting and knocked their heads together.
Wham, they were down.
Derpy and Twist's foes were now rolling around on the ground, fire coming out of their mouths, gasping at repeated bubble-delivered 'flavor explosions'. Ack.
Never messing with Twist or Bon-Bon.
Pinkie now rose up, kissed one of her foes, who stumbled in shock, then slammed a pie into the face of the other, who she dragged over. Then she somehow tied their shoelaces together, and watched them stumble around.
The water elemental suddenly found plants growing up through it, DRINKING it with their roots. It began to shrink and got battered with lightning by the Air Elemental. However, Cortland now burned FlutterLight's plants.
"You just killed them!" FlutterLight said in horror.
"They're just VINES," he said. "Vines are for BURNING."
And then her eyes blazed and she stared into his eyes and they were locked in a battle of wills.
Vanilla Surprise rose and ran over to Twilight. "I'm okay," she said. "Just shaken up."
Twilight was busy flinging around Giff like straw in a hurricane, while Rarity was busy sniping them and knocking them out.
And then eight trolls with mechanical parts came stomping out, even as Dr. Smith's Earth Elemental continued to fight the Fire Elemental. He now pulled out a wand and pointed it at the Fire Elemental; it wobbled but nothing else. He began fiddling with the wand as he held it in his mouth.
"Twilight Sparkle, you will surrender or they get it," they announced; one of them had Lyra in a bag; another had Bon-Bon. I could still hear fighting inside the place. There was a really high note and someone screamed and fell down.
"Oa... wait, those are FAKE Oards!" Dr. Smith said.
"We are UPGRADED," the lead troll-mech-thing insisted.
"Fake," he said. "Oards look like modified green HUMANS."
"The picture was low quality," another 'Oard' said.
"Dammit," a third said.
"Shut up you idiots," the first one hissed. "We demand Erik of Vestland and Twilight Sparkle surrender to us or they die; we will soon have your children as well. Also, shrink your companions."
FUCK.
The elementals, Flutterlight, Dr. Smith, and Cortland kept fighting; Derpy now flew down and offered some candy to the Diamond Dogs who ate it eagerly; their mouths caught fire and they fell down. And Magnus went by, crashing through fleeing Giff; the watchponies began chasing the Giff as well.
"I'm so sorry!" Lyra said. "I took out two of these idiots but there's a TON of them."
"OARDS!" Ditzy said in a sudden panic, now noticing them.
"Mom, it's OARDS!" Dinky shouted from inside.
"They are FAKE," Dr. Smith said.
Ditzy now began to hiss like a cat, spreading her wings to look bigger. She looked very angry. As much as anyone with wandering eyes can.
"Surrender to us or they die," the first one said, holding a blade ready. UGH.
Whether they work for Marjorie or the Thyatians or what, whoever surrenders to them is screwed. So screwed.
Of course, they don't know I'm Erik, but...
Twilight grimaced and everyone returned to normal size and she stepped forwards. "Look, I don't know where Erik is, even though all these terrible people want to hurt him. But I know he wouldn't let his friends get hurt if he was here." She stepped forward a little more. "Let them and the kids go. You can take me. But he's not here."
"We can use you as leverage to flush him out," the first one said. "I don't see him around here, and scrying for him isn't working."
Vanilla Surprise whistled cheerfully.
Thanks, Celestia, I owe you one.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, I cannot let them take Twilight. Who knows what they'll do to her.
I could think of many things and they all made me sick.
"Marcus," Rarity said softly. "If you can distract them, I will free our friends. I am pretty sure I can make them drop the bags."
I nodded to her.
"Twist," I said softly to her. "I need a shifting candy."
She tossed it into my mouth.
Urk.
I ate it quickly, even as Twilight came forward. Pinkie said, "You had BETTER keep your promises or I will make you pay!" She pointed angrily at the 'Oards'.
Ditzy was rocking back and forth on her feet; she would have done something crazy if not for the hostages. And if they took Dinky...
"Hah! Take THAT! AND THAT!" I could hear Apple Bloom shouting.
"I foresee a BAD FUTURE FOR YOU!" Sweetie shouted.
Loud music was playing inside and there was another thump.
"Do you work for Marquetta?" I asked them as I felt the power of the candy churn inside me.
"Depends on if she or the Thyatians bids higher," the lead 'Oard' said.
Rarity carefully readied her arrows.
One of the Oards got a bag ready as Twilight slowly moved forward.
"Twilight, you can't... I'm not..." Bon-Bon said, looking horrified.
Lyra said, "Dammit, this sucks. I haven't even seen the Prof in over a year! I... thanks, Twilight," she said softly.
"It doesn't matter. I won't leave any pony in need. They won't want you once they have me, Lyra." She looked determined. "Celestia would do this for any pony. And so will I."
Why do you have to be so NOBLE, Twilight? DAMMIT!
I am NOT letting them take you. Period.
I gave the candy its marching orders. Make me Erik of Vestland. NOW.
***************
The change came over me with the usual pain, though as always, brief lived.
"You want Erik of Vestland?" I said, my sword now in the axe form it had when I was Erik. "Here I am."
Twilight stared, mouth wide. Then she saw my clothing and her mouth quirked into a smile just for a moment. Also, I was wearing the hat Rarity made for me, which is very distinctive AND beautiful. "Oh Erik my love," she gushed. "I knew you'd come for me!" I could tell she was faking and I could not help but grin. Playing up to the mistaken ideas of our enemies together; that's the life.
She's going to whip my ass so hard after this but... dammit, no more lies. Once this fight is over.
"I am the great Erik of Vestland. I trample all things under my feet," I said, looking intently at the 'Oards' as if I could kill them with my eyes. "And I will die before I let you carry off Twilight and Lyra and Bon-Bon to GET TO ME. You want me? Let them go and you can have me."
Twilight looked worried and I locked gazes with her. 'We have to give Rarity an opening.'
Horns, they have advantages.
'Right,' she said. "Noooooo! Erik, I can't let you sacrifice yourself!" she said, then threw herself at me.
I caught her, holding her up. "I can't let them kill our friends, you know," I told her. She still had the flaming wings. 'I'll go for Lyra, you for Bon-Bon, when Rarity fires,' I told her and she nodded mentally.
"Enough disgusting romance," the first 'Oard' said. "Come surrender yourself or your pony friends die." He was getting impatient.
I will tell her EVERYTHING once we take these bastards down, I thought.
Wait, Twilight can TELEPORT. I am NEVER FUCKING FORGETTING THAT AGAIN.
'If they tie you, unless it negates magic, you can teleport out of it right?' I asked her.
'Surely they'd think to block that,' she said.
They screwed up their disguise; I won't count on that. 'Maybe. Best not to risk it.'
We came over together slowly and I wondered what on earth was delaying Rarity.
I put my hands out; I have a clever plan, though it will likely hurt. But that's life. "Release one of my friends," I said.
They dropped Bon-Bon, who hovered, not wanting to leave Lyra. "Go," I told her. "To safety."
She looked guilty, then scampered over to the rest of our group.
He started to tie me up, and one of them took my axe, while Twilight started to get nervous again. 'Go, you can teleport back and surprise them,' I told her.
"I can't leave you!" she said, agonized.
"Go. It's me they want," I told her very seriously. Seriously... okay, I wasn't actually lying, but I WAS acting.
She scampered back, and I said, "You can free Lyra now that you're starting to tie me up."
"We need someone to ensure your good behavior," the leader said.
Ditzy was watching them very, very intently as if she could destroy them with a gaze. I wondered again about the whole 'Derpy Hooves' thing. What on Mystara had she done worth that much of a bounty?
And who the hell pays that kind of bounty?
And then Herr Otto and Dona Carlotta came running out. He was dragging her along. "We've got to..." He paused and STARED at me. "Erik?" she said, stunned.
"Hi, Carlotta," I said. FUCK ME I TOTALLY FORGOT SHE WAS HERE. "Please don't try anything, they're holding Lyra hostage." I nodded towards Lyra.
I'm sorry, Lyra. I'm so sorry.
Her eyes flashed, making me KEENLY aware that she is Dona Carnelia's little niece "I can't just do nothing!"
"He abandoned you," Herr Otto said, frowning. "Frankly, given all the trouble he causes, he deserves this."
Dona Carlotta glared at him. "We both agreed that it was best we part. He didn't just run away from me."
I grimaced and so did Twilight.
"I care nothing for your drama," the 'Oard' leader said. "But if you stick your head in, I'm sure there's someone who will take good money for a pretty elf woman."
"I am not just a pretty face," Dona Carlotta hissed.
"Shut your fat face," I snapped at the boss. "You're frankly not even worthy to SPEAK to her." I was really angry. "Or to Twilight. Or to that puddle of vomit over there. You're no better than a damn slaver."
"You're in no position to talk; you've been a mercenary and a wrecker of havoc all your life. Do you know how big the messes you've left in your wake? You ever stop for ONE MINUTE to think about that?" the 'Oard' leader said angrily.
Yes, I have and I feel pretty shitty about it now that I can think clearly enough to even entirely realize it. I'm going to do my best to clean up some of my messes, assuming I don't die here.
"Erik is a GOOD MAN," Twilight said. "I refuse to believe these stupid lies people keep telling!" Suddenly I wasn't sure if she actually remembered I was Marcus or not.
Twilight, you're a better friend than I deserve. "I have made some messes, Twilight," I said as the man finished tying my hands. Rarity, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? "I ran away from you in a panic, and I'm sorry. I hurt you and I never even came back to apologize. I have a lot of messes to clean up."
Twilight blinked; okay, she was acting... or instincts and now she's acting... dammit, I can't tell if she thinks I am Erik or Marcus pretending to be Erik. Who actually is Erik. But you know that.
"Oh please, you used her for your own benefit, then you got bored and threw her away," the Oard leader said. "Like you've done a million times, like with the elf over there."
"We agreed!" Dona Carlotta said. She clearly was trying to come up with a plan while Herr Otto tried to hold her back. He's only doing it because he hates me but if it keeps her safe, okay. The hatred of people can be valuable if it gets you what you want and what I want is for her to NOT get hurt trying to save me.
Then I saw it, one of Rarity's arrow heads; it was slowly, methodically weakening the drawstring on the bag Lyra was held in. With all the conversation, our foes were not paying attention and now Rarity was setting up Lyra to escape. Only someone with her precision and attention to detail could have done this so well; they would notice nothing until it was too late.
Fortunately, no one noticed me noticing that. "If I was really pathetic, I'd dress up incompetently as an Oard, thinking I'd somehow fool a real expert like Ditzy. Perhaps you ought to ask yourself 'why is someone willing to pay millions of gold pieces for this mare and can I survive her getting angry'," I said. "I don't think you'd like her when she's angry." Now it's my job to talk like a maniac.
They forced me down to tie my legs and I flailed a little, trying to delay them but not so much they stab Lyra or notice Rarity in action.
I heard a distant thumping noise; glancing, I distantly saw Applejack and Big Macintosh coming our way, dragging the now unconscious beholder behind them. Excellent.
"Also, how exactly do you expect to get out of Canterlot alive with me?" I said.
"We only have to get as far as the Thyatian Embassy," he said.
Dammit, stop being smart!
Several of his men now looked nervously at Ditzy, who did her best to look menacing.. she is really not good at that, as the googly eyes ruin her serious face. She reared up and spread her wings to look as big as possible. "I destroyed the entire Entelchan Confederacy! Surrender now and Ditzy will be MERCIFUL!"
I have no idea what that even is, but Twilight's eyes widened. "That was YOU?" she said, stunned.
"Oh, Dr. Smith did most of the work. I just told their bound demons that if they didn't kill their targets, they didn't have to go back into the bottles," Ditzy said. "Really, it proves what Dad always said. If you hire someone, ALWAYS set a deadline for them to finish working. Vague instructions like 'Kill Baron Garcha' without a timeline? You are going to get SO RIPPED OFF. Fortunately, Carrot Top never forgets that. She's a good friend."
"..." I stared.
I begin to see why there is such a high price on her head.
'Now', Rarity told me. I saw Twilight start, then smile. Our eyes caught.
Dammit, I wish so much that I didn't have this whole damn bomb sitting over my head about me lying to her because this just... feels so right.
Twilight is an awesome friend to have adventures with and I feel much better having her here with me.
She just has the right to beat my ass like a drum.
I reached with my horn and my hat flew off my head onto the face of the fake Oard holding the bag Lyra was in. He dropped the bag instinctively and tried to get it off his face. Lyra now burst out of the bag and kicked him, knocking him down. "I'm free! Faster, Twilight, Kill Kill!"
Bon-Bon tossed Lyra's harp to her and now charged towards the fake Oards. I could see Applejack and Big Macintosh were coming; they were running at high speed. Poor Beholder; it was too knocked out to even scream; that can't feel good.
I can't believe I feel sorry for a BEHOLDER.
Ditzy launched, crashing into one of the Oards and knocking him for a loop. Pinkie and Vanilla Surprise hurled pies into the faces of two more of the Oards. Ivan and Lunette slipped out of the shadows and smacked two of the fake Oards in the back of the head; they went down, then Ivan grinned. "I wish I'd met you a long time ago," he said to Lunette.
"You wouldn't have enjoyed it at the time," she said ruefully.
Given her past, yeah, I can see that.
I held my hands up and Rarity shot the ropes off. Precision shooting girlfriend, best possible girlfriend. I called my blade to me with the magic of my horn and it cut off the leg ropes. The Oard leader hit me with an electrified rod and I fell down, but then Twilight slammed him into the wall of the club, hard.
I rose, stumbling, blade in hand, then charged him. "I AM SICK OF PEOPLE TRYING TO HURT MY FRIENDS TO HURT ME!" I shouted and he brought his rod around. CLANG. We both stumbled back, then started going at it.
The elementals continued to go at it; our team had the upper hand and FlutterLight was now forcing Cortland back up against a wall, the air between them crackling. Dr. Smith waved his wand and... a piercing wail made everyone stumble and he dropped it. "Blast it," he said. "That wasn't right either."
Another fake Oard rushed at me from behind but Rarity shot his weapon out of his hands, then forced him to flee with another arrow that chased him.
Twilight enlarged herself again, then unleashed a barrage of lighting balls, sending various fake Oards running for cover; Twist ran under the feet of one of them, tripping him, then shoved candy in his mouth.
BOOM, firey breath and stunned.
Lyra began playing her harp and now the fake Oards fell under her enchantment and began doing things like singing show tunes and running around in circles. Or even hitting each other. Confusion spell, very nice, I kind of... had a bad experience when I tried to learn it. Long story.
Then Applejack and Big Macintosh turned the beholder loose; it rolled like a giant stone ball right over the fake Oards, knocking many of them down, then got stuck in an alleyway opening.
Dona Carlotta now cast a spell and two of the fake Oards turned on each other, beating each other unconscious. Herr Otto grumbled, but cast a spell and acid rained down on the mechanical parts of several of them, wrecking them and sending them fleeing.
Seeing things well in hand, Lunette and Ivan ran inside.
"Who are you, really?" I demanded as I drove the fake Oard leader back in an angry frenzy. "Who put you up to this?"
"I'm just in it for the money!" he said. "I'm from Glantri! And as for my name, you will never know!" He now pulled out a metal egg and tried to shove it down my shirt but I pushed him back and wrenched it out of his hands with my magic. Oh yeah. I flung it down the street. BOOM!
I pray Celestia is going to pay for these repairs. Cobblestones flew everywhere, but thankfully, by now the previously rioting mobs of ponies had scattered and I made sure to keep it away from my friends.
Applejack and Big Macintosh now charged into the club. "Apple Bloom, are you okay?" Applejack shouted.
"We're fine!" she shouted. "Princess Luna and Ivan are helping us!"
Good for them, I thought.
"Manuel of the Plains is here to defend the innocent!" Don Diego shouted.
"What?" Big Macintosh said, confused.
You and me both, Big Macintosh.
You and me both.
Bon-Bon now kicked the Oard leader from behind. I whacked him with the flat back end of my axe, which I now turned into... basically a shiny metal club. We began battering him back and forth between us, shouting about kidnapping, until he passed out.
Fucker. NO ONE DOES THAT TO MY FRIENDS.
I held a hand out to Bon-Bon. "You are a magnificent woman and I am proud to have kicked that bastard's ass with you."
We shook hand-to-hoof, but then she said, "The children!"
The kids! AND Don Diego! The whole place is probably leveled by now. I'm sorry, club owner, whoever you are, you really deserved better than this.
We rushed inside.
************
A lot of ponies were hiding by the walls as the center of the room was occupied by a riot. They hadn't been able to leave because of our riot out front. The bartender was yelling, "NOOO!!!!!" because Apple Bloom was standing on the bar, grabbing bottles of alcohol and other drinks and hurling them at the enemy; Don Diego would then set them on fire, sending enemies scattering. Setting the alcohol on fire, that is; Belcadizians love burning alcohol tricks. There's even several dishes you basically cook by burning alcohol on it.
About half of the fake Oards were wandering around in a daze. Octavia, her band, and DJ Pon3 were laying down magical music, keeping them in a state of confusion. The rest were chasing Scootaloo and Sweetie and Dinky around; clouds of mist floated through the room, giving them places to hide. Ivan and Lunette darted in and out of the mist, ambush-bashing them.
Rarity immediately took shots at the ones chasing Sweetie, disarming them and sending them running. I then ran over to her. Ditzy charged through, grabbed Dinky, then rose to the ceiling leaving a wave of bubbles in her wake. Applejack charged through and kicked down the fake Oards threatening Apple Bloom, backed by Big Macintosh.
With all of us here, pretty quickly we mopped up the ones here, then Spike, who had been lost in the fog, sent a message to the City Watch, who would need to take all these damn fake Oards and everything else into custody.
"Are you okay?" Rarity asked Sweetie.
"I'm not Sweetie, I'm one of the Plains Crusaders!" Sweetie insisted.
Rarity laughed. "So you're fine?"
"I'm fine, not my big sister at all." Sweetie looked at me. "Who are you?"
"It's Marcus in disguise," Rarity said. "He used some of the candy to turn into Erik of Vestland."
Dammit, I really, really need to tell everyone about this but there's a billion people here.
But before I get myself in any deeper, I have to do it.
*************
Eventually, we finished helping to tow away the fallen and cleaning up the mess as best we could. I was pretty worn out from moving things with muscle and magic. None of us relished the prospect of the walk back to the castle. Except the Earth Ponies, none of whom were really tired.
Dammit.
Don Diego had run off, but the CMC stayed with us, now divested of their costumes, each having run off and changed out of the outfits out of sight, so they could maintain their implausible deniability.
And I have to talk to Rarity and then... I have to talk to Twilight.
Dammit.
And really, I need to make it up to everyone.
Rarity first, though, as she's... my girlfriend.
I ran my hand along her back as we walked. She smiled and gave me a little telekinetic backscratching with her ever so handy thimbles. "We have to talk once we get back," I told her softly.
She studied me, with clearly unasked questions, but then she nodded. "You smell different," she said.
"What do I smell like?"
"Salt water," Rarity said. "You have the smell of the sea."
"Really? He smells like books to me," Twilight said.
What???
"He smells like the morning I left the rock farm," Pinkie said thoughtfully.
"It must be something to do with the polymorph magic," Vanilla Surprise said. "Because he smells to me like a dirt road."
Sweetie now sniffed me. "You smell like playing cards to me."
Clearly something odd with this spell. But I'd worry about that later.
I have a bunch of confessions to make.
***************
Most of the group went to the bathhouse, but Rarity and I went to our room. "I spent a lot of time trying to figure out if we were just flirting at each other because we enjoyed it or if you were serious. If *I* was serious," I told her once we were in our chambers; she shed her fancy dress and I got out of my suit. "I've never... I've dated all sorts of humanoids, but unless... well, it's entirely possible I've done this before, but if I have, I've forgotten." I sat down on the bed and she hopped up to sit next to me. "I spent a lot of time dithering because it just... I don't even know the right questions, really."
"I know," she said, resting her head on my leg. "I prefer being a pony, I know you prefer being a human. But when we're the same thing, it's so... intense." She blushed a little. "I spent a fair amount of time thinking about this and wondering. I knew my own feelings, I thought I knew yours, but I wasn't sure. And I wasn't sure of our future." She licked her lips nervously. "I don't know how father will take it."
"I've been inside his head. Or a simulation of it. He's going to hate me." I sighed and ruffled her hair. "I have to tell you a secret."
"About one of your past lives, right?" she said.
"The previous one. Before I was Marcus. I only became Marcus a few days before I met you, when some woman who turned into a monster found me and killed me. I'm not even sure why, since she didn't bother to rob me."
Rarity looked thoughtful. "Marquett... no, she would have robbed you."
"I was Erik of Vestland," I told her.
She winced. This made me wince. "I thought it possible, but I was not sure enough to ask. It explains how you knew his face to take it and why you dislike Herr Otto." She frowned at me. "You have to forget about her, you know."
"I have to tell her and he's going to kill me, but she ought to know," I said, sighing. "I know, I know, I have no right to complain. She loves him, that's enough."
"You had no trouble fixing Twilight up with others," Rarity said.
"I didn't love Twilight," I told her. "She was a good friend and I like her, but..."
"You were willing to risk dying for her," Rarity said, studying my face and sniffing me.
"I was trusting in you to save us both," I told her and she smiled a little. "But yes, I am willing to risk that. I do care about her. But it's not the same. I want her to find someone and be happy with them." Though I suspect Celestia does hope I'll end up with Twilight. "You can trust me to be around her."
I could feel her tension; it's a valid worry. "I trust you, darling," she said. "I wish you'd told me this earlier, though." She was clearly not happy about that.
"I was too afraid. But I am trying not to be afraid," I told her.
"By being suicidal. You just needed to distract him," she said with some reproach.
"Guilt," I said, sighing. "And impulse. It worked, though. But now I have to tell her, tell everyone. Or at minimum, her. But MY mess put her in danger. So she ought to know. Everyone should. And she deserves the truth."
"You can tell her tomorrow," Rarity said. "I want to have fun tonight without a disaster or Twilight being sad."
"So do I," I told her.
"You can make this up to me by spending a day a week as a pony," she said. "We will need to get comfortable with each other's forms. So I will spend a human day and you can spend a day as a pony. And in the future, we share everything, unless someone asks us to hold a confidence."
"Okay," I told her. "No more secrets. I want to be free of hiding things. If we're both doing it, though, I should do something else for you too."
"I will find something," Rarity said. "You can owe me a favor."
"Fair enough," I said.
"We..." She paused and looked thoughtful, then went and put her robe on. Then she got another one of the candies. "Since we already kissed as ponies... "
"I agree," I told her, grinning.
She laughed softly. "Tomorrow, you have to tell Twilight."
"I will," I told her. "I really should do it tonight."
"Not tonight," she said. "I just want to have some fun before any explosions."
Then she popped the candy and turned into her human form; we are going to have to get her some underwear. Her eyes widened and she said, "Do humans always feel like this?"
"We'd never get out of bed," I told her. Then I kissed her for a long time. I wanted to do more, but best not to rush things, given the body issues. "Oh! I nearly forgot!"
She blinked. "Yes?"
"I have... well, it's more or less a cutie mark," I told her. "Celestia and Luna modified this... Okay, here's the story."
I told her the whole story as we cuddled.
"If Twilight sees it, she'll know everything," I told her. "So I can't get totally naked until I tell everyone."
"OH," she said.
"Mind you, the stuff I said about nudity is true, but mainly I was trying to hide that. As Twilight saw Erik with it when it was just one."
We ended up making her some underwear to wear also, so we'd match and I'd have my excuse to avoid total nudity, yet.
Then we took our robes and went to meet the others.
*************
Vanilla Surprise met us at the door. "Marcus, time for you to go to work, since you have HANDS."
"..."
I was probably born to be a cabana boy, anyway. I circulated, pouring drinks and helping to clean people; Celestia has her own nice bathhouse, normally just for her and Luna and special guests. We relaxed and I tended bar and attended to everyone.
Dash and Soarin' were busy snuggling in the hot tub, both half asleep. I smiled at them. I hope Dash... she's probably going to be mad I didn't tell her everything. Dammit.
"Back rub now," Vanilla Surprise said, sprawling out.
"I'll do it," Big Mac said. "He can't serve everyone if he's serving you."
"Mmm, be gentle," Vanilla Surprise said into her pillow.
He was; he's a very gentle man, I could tell.
I brought the CMC some apple juice. They all stared at my underwear. "Why wear just that?" Apple Bloom asked.
"You're not old enough for me to explain," I told her, handing out glasses to everyone.
Twist and Dinky and Sweetie all looked at each other, smiled, and started drinking.
Surely someone has NOT told them all that already.
Apple Bloom grimaced. "I'm a big pony now!" She held her glass with her tail and sipped from her straw.
"Hey, Apple Bloom," Ivan said.
I nearly fell down; sudden Ivan attack! Or arrival, anyway. He was dressed like me.
"Yes, Ivan?" she said.
"I hear you're good with machines and things," Ivan said. "And building."
"Yes," she said. "Uncle K thinks I have potential!" she said proudly.
I grimaced 'Uncle K'.
Ivan looked hornswoggled for a moment, then said, "How would you like to learn to pick locks and disarm traps? Rarity's going to study with me to improve her skills." He looked at me. "Marcus can help teach you."
"Cool! Daring Thief Crusaders!" Scootaloo said.
I hope she has thick skin and a high pain threshold.
"Oooh, I want to try!" Sweetie said.
"And me!" Dinky said.
I penciled in a disaster to my mental calendar.
"MORE WINE!" Applejack shouted.
I brought her the apple brandy. "Try this," I said.
"WOO!" She was somewhat drunk and flying high.
"Cabana Boy! I require HARD LIQUOR," Vanilla Surprise shouted.
Urgle.
"She is not allowed to ever have hard liquor again!" Lunette shouted. She was in human form, down to basically underwear.
"I am QUEEN OF HARD LIQUOR!" Giggle.
Bloody hell, Celestia's drunk.
"No hard liquor, then," Big Macintosh said. "By royal command."
"SOFT LIQUOR!"
Heh. I got her some wine. That would have to do.
Rarity was busy taking measurements on Lunette. "I will design you some outfits for this form. I will need some as well." Her measuring devices whirred about her.
"Don't forget you have hands and can pick things up," Lunette pointed out to her, smiling.
"..."
I laughed and brought her a glass of orange brandy mixed with some fruit juice and cinnamon. "Here you go, dear," I told her. "You can relax, you know."
"Darling, when I see a friend in need, I MUST act," Rarity said.
"I really don't use this form a lot," Lunette said.
"Nonsense, it's beautiful and should not be wasted," Rarity said. She looked at me and winked and I winked back.
Why are we winking?
But if your girlfriend winks at you, you WINK BACK.
"Ivan, I require your body!" Rarity said loudly, then sipped her drink.
For a moment, I wondered if Celestia had possessed her. I could hear Vanilla Surprise laughing.
Ivan nervously came over. "What?"
"I must measure you. Do you really think you can wear THAT to the company of the Immortals?" Rarity said.
"I would wear more than underwear!" he protested.
"Also, your underwear is very, very drab. White is simply not your color."
Mine is dark blue, if you care. Rarity was wearing a kind of shimmering fabric; I rather liked it.
"You're heading back tomorrow, right?" Vanilla Surprise said to Big Macintosh.
"I fear so," he said. "There's a lot of work to be done."
"Thank you for escorting me," she said. "I had a good time. It was nice to put my crown aside for a little while."
"I had fun too," he said. "But a farmer's work is never done," he said stolidly, neither celebrating nor denying it.
"Nor a Queen's," she said. "But even a Queen needs a moment to relax."
"And a farmer too," he said comfortably.
Ivan continued to be worked over... measured by Rarity. I could tell he was trying very hard not to look at her chest, even if they were covered. Don't even think it, Ivan.
"BEER!" Soarin' shouted.
Beer it is. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book 5: Whiskey Fueled Violence Here I Come | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 5: Whiskey Fueled Violence Here I Come
By John Biles
***************
Sometimes you have to be pushed into something. This is why I had made this arrangement. Rarity pushed me gently with her head. "She's there and waiting, I will block any escape on your part."
I laughed nervously. "I should have worn something less flammable."
"All clothing is flammable, dear," she said, clearly a little amused.
I told myself to go in; my legs did not move.
"Marcus, is that you?" Twilight said. I'd sent a message to ask her to wait in her room for me after breakfast.
Urrrrgh. "It's me," I finally forced myself to say.
Rarity head-butted me.
I breathed in and out, then went in. Twilight was drinking coffee and reading a book about Trollhattan; the region of the Broken Lands in which Marquetta has her lair. Or so we think, anyway. She was sprawled out on the bed.
"There's a ruins near there that you know about, right?" she asked me as I came in.
I sat down on the edge of the bed, turning to face her; no chairs, unfortunately.
Spike now entered with a plate of donuts, then ate one. "Here's the snack," he said, then frowned at me.
Oh man, I really, really should have chosen something LESS FLAMMABLE.
This is going to suck.
I took one. "Thanks, Spike."
"Why's Rarity lurking in the hallway?" Spike asked.
"You could ask her," I told him. Dammit, no one was supposed to notice my running-away-stopper. I wasn't thinking at all.
"YES!" he said and ran outside.
Twilight laughed softly. "That was kind of you," she said.
"Spike's a good guy," I said, then worked on a donut. Once I finished chewing, I said, "Yes. I would LOVE to explore that place with your team. Helga, Ivan, and I used to have a map to it but only the Immortals know what happened to it." I sighed. I also lost my pipe and my tobacco somewhere in White Plume Mountain. And I probably shouldn't replace it, since I am staying with an impressionable child. If I smoke for 2 seconds, the whole CMC will be trying to smoke within minutes.
Dammit.
That was a GREAT pipe.
"See, I'm thinking maybe we could lure her forces out to try to compete with us to get the old Blackmoorian treasures," Twilight said.
"I like how you think," I said, smiling.
She smiled back, which made my gut scream, knowing I was going to erase that smile.
Dammit.
I like that smile.
Then she paused and looked nervous. "Last night..."
Fuck fuck fuck. I came here to do this but now I want to run but Spike is outside and will BURN ME ALIVE.
There IS the window, though.
No, no, dammit, be honest with her.
"I am actually Erik of Vestland, reincarnated," I said.
"I think Celestia may actually have a thing for Big Macintosh," Twilight said. "But I may be imag... what?" Her eyes widened. "I thought you were bluffing!"
OH FUCK ME.
I had to tell her but this was totally NOT SMOOTH AT ALL.
"I ran away from you because you totally caught me off guard," I told her. "And drunk. Back when you... when I was still Erik. And I assumed Celestia would kill me, you would kill me, Spike... well, Spike tried to kill me before I escaped."
I could hear him laughing in the hallway. Fuck me.
"She would have blessed us," Twilight said painfully. "I wanted... I was ready... I loved you very much," she said, pained.
"I'm sorry," I told her. "When you rescued me, I was too afraid, then I was afraid I'd hurt you and you'd kill me for lying to you and..."
She started crying and I crumpled in on myself. DAMMIT.
"But when I saw that people around me would get hurt even if my identity was hidden, I had to tell you. Tell everyone. I confessed to Rarity last night. We're together now, and she knows about this. Only you and her know. I don't know if I should tell everyone but... I think I have to. In case someone tries to pull this shit to get to me again." I turned angry on the last sentence. "Seeing you there, willing to risk yourself like that... I was so angry." My hands clenched and unclenched. "I'm sorry. I'll do whatever you want to atone. I should have come clean, but I'm not very brave." I studied the floor. "I've died too many times. It's kind of ground me down."
I took a deep breath and looked up at her; she was crying and I forced myself not to look away. "I won't lie to you any more," I said, not knowing what else to say. I wanted to cheer her up but knew I couldn't do that.
"How am I supposed to know that's true?" she shouted at me.
I winced. I had that coming. Dammit. "You saw what I did last night," I told her. I heard her make a noise; I couldn't look at her face. "I'll do whatever you want for me to atone. I know I have to make it up to you and earn your trust again." I want to earn her trust.
"GET OUT!" she shouted.
"I will," I told her. "We can talk again later. I'm sorry."
I headed for the door quickly, wishing I had been able to handle it better.
"What's going on?" Spike said angrily to me as I came out. Rarity looked worried.
"I'm Erik," I told him. "And I had to tell her the truth and she's not happy with me and I deserve it."
He head-butted me in the groin and would have done worse if Rarity hadn't stopped him.
"Damn you, Erik, you just screw up everything!" he shouted at me, then ran in and slammed the door.
Yeah, I know.
I felt both doom and relief at once. One burden gone, another in its place. But she would... hopefully... get over it.
I said something incoherent about Fluttershy while lying there clutching myself. Eventually, I recovered. "You should probably get Fluttershy and talk to her... assuming she isn't mad at you." I winced. "Which is possible."
Rarity nodded. "I will."
"I'm going to rest, then I will go tell everyone." Hopefully I will not be dead by dinner.
**************
I got yelled at some, but Ponies tend to be pretty forgiving. I piled up a large number of penances, but that's okay. Some of them maybe hard to survive, but... that's my life.
Dash was the hard one. Because she didn't get mad.
She got hurt.
She stared at the floor. "Why didn't you tell me before?" she said, pained. "I wouldn't have told anyone."
"I was too scared to tell anyone," I said.
She looked at me, just for a second. "You were scared of me?"
"No, I didn't mean that," I said.
"Don't you trust me?" she said, now very pained, and pacing around her room.
"Of course I trust you," I told her. "I've put my life in your hands."
"Yes, but I told you secrets. I put my trust in you," she said, then glared at me. "Why wouldn't you in me?"
"I know, I'm sorry." I hung my head. "I'll make it up to you. However you want."
She just made an unhappy noise, jumped out the window and flew off.
FUCK.
**************
I moped under a tree. I'm good at that.
Eventually Sweetie found me. "What's wrong? Everyone looks unhappy and is whispering about things."
I patted the ground next to me and she sat.
I told her everything as she stared, eyes wide.
"Welcome to adulthood," I told her. "Complicated, messy, full of mistakes."
She scrunched up her face. "It's not supposed to be."
I wish, Sweetie, I wish.
"Anyway, I am Rarity's official boyfriend now," I told her. "Assuming your Dad doesn't kill me."
"He will love you very much," she said firmly.
I know better.
"You still..." she said hesitantly.
"I still like you very much," I told her. "I'm happy to be your big brother."
She smiled brightly at that. "Can you teach me some more card magic?"
"I'll work with you. Oh yes..." I drew in the dirt. "This is what my Cutie Mark looks like," I told her.
Her eyes widened. "That's like mine."
"Probably because of our little adventure together."
"YOU HAVE TO TAKE US ON AN ADVENTURE," Apple Bloom said, dropping on me from the tree. OWW.
"Yeah, we want to do something COOL and get all Cutie-d up!" Scootaloo said.
"Weren't you two going to lessons with Ivan?"
"He's still getting set up," Scootaloo said.
"I will help him with teaching you if I am free," I told her.
"Yaay!"
I felt a little better, at least; their good cheer was infectious.
***************
Telling Dona Carlotta didn't get me set on fire.
This is because Herr Otto uses ACID.
I ran around like a maniac, dodging his acid arrows and parrying with my sword. "I said I'd make it up to you both for getting you into my trouble!"
"I don't care about your stupid lies, I care about you being a self-centered cowardly ASSHOLE!" Herr Otto said.
"Otto, that's enough," Dona Carlotta said. "I'm not happy with him either, but I can't let you kill him either!"
"He ran away and abandoned you! Everything I hear about him, he's a criminal bastard! And then he got us attacked and you in DANGER," Herr Otto said, frowning intensely.
"We AGREED to do it. Come on, Otto, you're better than this," she pleaded.
"If you won't kill him, I WILL," Otto shouted, though I suspect... hope... he just really wants to beat me up some.
So I ran like a maniac with him chasing me. My clothing was going to be destroyed by the end of this. Falling down a staircase didn't help either.
Then Dash descended from the sky and interposed herself. "That's ENOUGH," she said.
"Get out of my way!"
Carlotta caught up and grabbed him.
"That's ENOUGH," she said. "See you later, Marcus," she said. Probably much later. But it's okay, I have it coming.
"See you, Carlotta," I said. Dammit, just seeing her... No, it's over, I have a girlfriend and she has an asshole... a boyfriend. "I'm sorry, Dash," I said to her.
"You have to tell me a secret NO one else knows," she said hotly. "Just between us. Show you trust me."
"Okay," I said. "Here's the story..."
***************
EXCLUSIVE FLASHBACK FOR DASH:
My name was Aristobolus then. I was tooling around Alphatia, pretending... Actually, I may have thought I was Alphatian. It's hard for me to remember a lot of when I was him.
Alphatia...Alphatians are obsessed with freedom. It's part of why I went there. Even the slightest amount of magic makes you part of the aristocracy. I wasn't a great mage, but having even one spell makes you noble. About twenty percent of Alphatians are aristocrats; the rest have no ability to cast spells.
But the problem is that their freedom is based on slavery. One out of every three Alphatians is a slave; one of every four free Alphatians owns one or more slaves. Some own hundreds, or even thousands.
I was able to ignore that for a while. I grew up... I think I grew up somewhere with no slavery, but it wasn't rabidly anti-slavery either. Really, I'm not sure any more. And the fun of being part of the elite in Alphatia, running around and getting in trouble... it kept me from thinking about it.
I associated with various adventurers, some spell-casters, but most were not. Eventually, I ran into three of them I had known before; they had been enslaved after being caught... okay, they basically were crazy enough to rob a wizard without bringing a wizard along to deal with his wards.
So they ended up his slave.
THAT got to me. It's easy to ignore slaves you don't know, to just walk past someone you don't know who is suffering. Without feeling the urge to act.
But they were friends and I couldn't just ignore it. It ate at me. I tried to buy them but their owner was the guy they had robbed and he wouldn't let them go.
So I stole them. And his magic boat. And his magic hat. And, well, basically everything.
The wizard tried to kill me three times. The second time, we got scattered. I hope they're still free. Eventually, I foolishly joined a group trying to raid the Temple of Elemental Evil. We got locked in a segment of the dungeon due to this idiot Shadow Elf renegade who freed a demon by causing it to possess one of our dead party members. By stupidly putting said dead party member inside a summoning circle. Jakus was a moron.
That's when the Gorgon killed me, I think. I still don't know how I got out of turning to stone. Beyond the sword, but it's all a blur after that until I met Ivan.
I don't think anyone else from that foolish party survived, so no one's looking for Aristobolus.
But I can't favor Alphatia like I once did.
And I hate slavery.
*************
"You really can't go very long without getting in trouble," Dash said.
"That's me," I told her.
She grinned a little. "Okay, that's a good secret." She sighed. "I'm still disappointed you didn't tell me."
"Well, you would have had to hide it from everyone," I said apologetically. "Better not to force you into that choice."
Dash had the look of someone boxed in who feels there must be a hole in the logic but they can't SEE it.
"So that's why you freed that harem," Dash said.
It being a bevy of beautiful women didn't hurt either. "Yes," I said.
She smiled a little. "And now you're part of Rarity's harem."
"The only member," I said. I'm not suprised she's popular with guys, though.
Dash just grinned at me, then said, "So what are you going to do about Herr Otto?"
"Let him cool off. Try and avoid him and Carlotta. She's not happy with me either."
"Want to go flying?" Dash said. "It always clears my head."
"We'll need an enlarge spell," I said. "Let's go to the library and I'll see if I can find us one."
Soon we were soaring over the city and the fortress, the sun streaming down.
It really does clear your head.
************
"Oooh, the Broken Lands," Dash said to me as we flew. "There's some really cool places to fly there," she told me.
We dropped down and zoomed over a city street, bustling with people and ponies and business. Pegasi darted about, hauling goods and delivering messages.
I held on tight; it was exhilarating; kind of scary but the excitement was more than the fear and it was a good feeling. "I was thinking you're just the pony to find the tower for us again."
"Oh yeah, I can find ANYTHING from the air," Dash said proudly. "At least if I know what to look for."
I told her about the place, until it was time for lunch and then we went and met most of the others for lunch. Fluttershy, Applejack, Spike, and Twilight were in Twilight's quarters, which made me feel guilty. Rarity looked somewhat shaken up.
"You okay?" I asked.
"I am fine, darling," she said, then sipped her tea. "I had to play punching bag. Verbally, of course."
I winced. "Dammit."
"She needed to let it out. She'll be... better in a day or two."
I hoped there would be no crises.
**************
COUNTERPOINT: Twilight's Point of View
You know, how there are times when you know why you are feeling an emotion and you don't actually WANT to feel it but you can't help it?
I completely hate those times.
"Just one bite," Fluttershy said, then spooned the soup and held it up close to my mouth, the other end of the spoon between her teeth.
"I'm not hungry," I told the ceiling. "Also, not a small child."
She put it back in the soup. "If you don't eat, you'll get weak and feel bad and it will be worse." Her voice was very gently chiding.
"Don't be a drama queen, eat some lunch," Applejack said bluntly, then worked on her soup; she didn't bother with a spoon.
Spike said something incoherent through his mouthful of soup. No doubt pledging death to Erik... Marcus... again.
It's so obvious now that I feel like a buffoon for not seeing it. Though he has changed. Erik... he was a little nervous when I met him but then he relaxed. We were so comfortable together; it felt like it had to be right.
It still feels comfortable. Right now, I half want to kill him and half want to hide under my bed until I die, but before that... right up to when he told me everything... it felt like old times.
He was afraid of me. Not just Celestia. ME. I don't even understand why. "I don't scare people do I?"
"This soup would scare Marcus," Applejack said. "He'd see the tomatos and think they were floating severed heads or something." She snorted and ate more soup.
"Marcus is sensitive like me," Fluttershy said, then held out the soup to me.
I sighed, sat up and ate it, then took the spoon with my magic and started making myself eat, though I wasn't hungry. "He thought I would do something terrible to him and I don't even understand why," I said. Then I started working on my food.
"If you keep chewing yer cud, you'll just go nuts," Applejack said. "We've gotta get you out of this room and DOING something. Before you drive yourself crazy with what ifs and then try to go back in time or something."
There are ways to go back in time.
But I am not that crazy or hurt.
We all ate quietly while I tried not to brood.
"I'm going to kill him," Spike said.
"No, no," I told him wearily. "He confessed, he wants to atone, so no killing."
"I want his left arm as atonement," Spike grumbled.
"No maimin'," Applejack said firmly. She sipped her carrot juice. "What are these purple things?" she said, studying a slice of something purple.
"It's elven," Spike said. "They get weird in Alfheim."
"Elven radish," I said. "They grow near the Trees of Life and take on a strong woody flavor with a hint of mint. The elven name is Rathelos."
"Any connection to Ranathos?" Fluttershy asked curiously.
"They were native to the area before Alfheim was planted." The main Elven kingdom in this region was grown with climate magic by Elves and Ponies working together centuries ago in what used to be fairly dry hills. Powerful permanent redirection of weather drew in moisture from other places and helped rapid growth.
I recommend Meister Alphonse the Wise's book on the subject, The Creation of Alfheim, if you want to know more. It's a good read.
"There are also spicy red ones, but they're hard to prepare properly," I continued, feeling a little better. Knowing things makes me feel better.
He'd risk his life for mine but he didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth. He was...
That's enough. I am moping so much.
They let me ramble on about the uses and cooking of Elven turnips while we ate. Once we were done, Applejack said, "Let's go shopping."
I stared at her. Applejack wanting to go shopping? "Really?"
"You tell us what you want for dinner and we'll borrow some kitchen space and make it for you," Applejack said.
I was going to point out that there are professional chefs, the kitchen is well-stocked, and our time would be better used elsewhere.
I then realized three things.
One, I wanted to do something beyond mope in my room even more.
Two, she wants to do something nice for me, and I will admit I would like to have something nice and hand-made.
Third, I was not, in fact, going to do anything useful whatsoever if we didn't do this.
I checked off the list in my mind. "Spike, take a message. Tell Princess Celestia we're going shopping and invite her to eat with us tonight." Assuming she can spare the time, anyway.
I know she's very busy but I could use a hug.
Not that my friends don't give good hugs but no one hugs like Celestia.
Spike did so. "Can we also get some sausage for me?"
"Gonna have to tell me how to cook it," Applejack said to him. "Winona likes her meat raw."
"I can eat it raw, my fire will cook it, but it's better cooked properly," Spike said.
Spike's inner fire lets him digest almost anything he can chew. And he can chew almost anything. Given months or years to work at it, he could eat this entire castle eventually.
But he won't.
"Don't worry," I said. "I know just where to go."
****************
STILL TWILIGHT'S POINT OF VIEW:
Except the place was closed and had been replaced by a harness and leather goods shop.
"Angry enough to eat a bridle?" Applejack said curiously.
"This used to be a wonderful grocery store named Eastern Star! It was run by this really gentle mare named Sea Salt," I said frantically. "Why is it gone?"
"When were you last here?" Fluttershy asked me.
"When we moved into the tower," Spike said. "Right before we moved in, Twilight's mother took us there."
"Well, let's go in and ask," Applejack said. "Seems the sensible way to find out."
I moved into the tower once I finished my basic degree and began working on my advanced studies. So it's been several years.
Applejack strode right up to one of the clerks. "Can you tell me when you opened?"
"Around nine am," the young stallion said; he was a palomino. Not bad looking. Too young, though, at that awkward age where you aren't a colt but you're not really fully a stallion either.
"I mean, when did this become a leather shop?" Applejack asked.
He studied her. "I'll tell you for a kiss."
Fluttershy's eyes widened.
"Didn't your mama teach you when to flirt with a customer and when not?" Applejack said a little sternly.
I stepped in. "There used to be a grocery store here. Do you know what happened to it?"
"Moved to a newer, bigger facility over by the Fillydelphia gate," he said. "Hey, are you Twilight Sparkle?"
I felt a little embarrassed. "Yes, I am. This is my friend Applejack and my friend Fluttershy."
"Hi," Fluttershy said shyly. She was wearing the hat and sunglasses again.
"You don't look like the famous model," he said, studying her.
"I was named after her," Fluttershy said.
I blinked. What... OH.
"I think you're prettier than Fluttershy, Fluttershy," Spike said. "She's a stuck up model and very reclusive, unlike you." He seemed very amused.
"But I... oh yes, I am VERY outgoing," Fluttershy said, laughing nervously.
"And now we must be outgoing," Applejack said, laughing. "Thanks, kid."
"I am a BIG PONY," he said offended.
Applejack kept laughing all the way out.
*************
Eastern Star was now Western Star, as it was on the southwest side of the city by the various ways you can descend down to Lower Canterlot and then head to Fillydelphia. There's a very long switchbank ramp, stairs, and giant elevators, including one the trainline uses.
We found everything I wanted, and we got Spike some sausage; there was more human food here than I remembered, more human customers too. One odd fellow was wearing some sort of badge he'd covered over with a handkerchief, which seemed odd to me. He was human, short dark hair. He looked a little furtive, but though we watched him, he didn't steal anything.
He just bought a lot of chicken.
Spike also got some peppers and onions and tomatos. "Going to make the BEST soup ever," he said firmly. "And pretend every tomato is Marcus' fat head."
The new place was nice, but it was... something just wasn't quite right and I didn't know what.
"It's just nostalgia, dear," Sea Salt said as she calculated our sale.
I said it aloud? Oh no! "I didn't mean..."
"It's okay," she said. "My old store, it's tied up with your childhood, but that's over now. I remember you, Twilight Sparkle." Her silver eyes twinkled; there was silver in her black mane now, long strands of it. Somehow I didn't even notice until now. "I feel some of it myself. But a business woman either moves forward or dies. The same for you." She looked at my friends. "Good to see you have friends now."
I winced. "Was it that obvious?"
"Very," Spike said.
I winced again and Fluttershy said, "Twilight is a very good friend."
I listened to the swishing and clicking of Sea Salt's abacus. There's gray in her white coat but it's harder to see.
"Good," Sea Salt said. "I used to worry but it wasn't my place to say anything to your parents."
Do other people normally bring their friends to the store with them?
Please tell me I didn't say that out loud.
No one responded.
Whew.
"So what's the special occassion?" Sea Salt asked.
"We're eatin' with Celestia," Applejack said.
Sea Salt's eyes widened. "Seriously?"
"Yes," I said. If she says yes. She hasn't replied yet.
I guess she must be pretty busy.
She licked her lips nervously, then said, "Hold on. Rock Salt!"
A brown maned, grey-coated stallion, about my age, came running out of the back. "Yes, grandma?"
"Handle sales. I'll be right back."
She ran into the back and I blinked.
She returned with three things. A box of tea, a jar with about two inches of mixed spices, and something labelled in Ochelean. I only know enough Ochelean to know it IS, to my embarrassment. I just have not had enough time because my efforts to learn Blackmoor-era Elven eat up all my free language time.
"On the house," she said kindly. "For her highness."
"I couldn't just take it," I said, feeling a little guilty at getting special treatment.
"I met Princess Celestia once; she shopped here, thinking she was in disguise, but it was a terrible disguise," Sea Salt said. "She wanted advice on making something for her sister to welcome her back from her long trip. It was very sweet of her."
I smiled; we all did. That's Celestia all over.
"Well, that was right nice of her," Applejack said approvingly.
"She is very loving to her sister," Fluttershy said, smiling.
"Anyway, that is how I know she is fond of all these," Sea Salt said. "The spices are my special mix; you can just bring back the jar when you're done. And this is... are you familiar with kufo?"
"OH," I said. "Basically blocks of bean...paste? It's too solid for paste. It's made from beans and it absorbs the flavor of what you soak it in. The commoners there use it to share the flavor of something they can't afford much of among everyone, such as buying a nice cut of meat and then letting it absorb juices so it turns that flavor."
She nodded. "And it has a nice texture to it," Sea Salt said. "Anyway, these are on the house for our hard-working Princess."
I smiled. "Thank you so much. I'll find some way to repay you."
"You'd best go before my son recognizes who you are, Fluttershy," Sea Salt whispered to us now. "I'll keep him distracted."
Fluttershy looked flummoxed, then nodded and ran.
A Fluttershy run, which is like walking briskly for the rest of us.
I am so lucky to live in such a wonderful country with dear friends, where even... well, she's not a stranger, but now...
She's a friend now. I will find a way to repay her.
But what exactly am I going to do with this kufo? It's not in the recipe!
I mulled on that all the way back to the castle.
************
TWILIGHT VIEWPOINT 3: THE REVENGE:
Ivan looked somewhat battered when he came to consult with me in the kitchen. "Kufo absorbs the taste of what it cooks in, but it also can be a meat substitute," he told us. "Humans need a certain amount of meat, but kufo makes a good substitute. Beans, peanuts, and the like, too."
"Oh, it has protein," Fluttershy said.
"I don't know what that is," Ivan confessed. "But I have cooked a lot of kufo in my time, as I tend to have a boom-bust finance cycle. It should be fine for ponies, though."
He showed us how to work with it; I wondered if.. of course he knew about it. Erik... Marcus trusts him more than anyone else. And Helga. I wonder what she's like.
Don't think about him, I told myself. Focus on cooking and having fun.
"Hmm, I bet I could soak these in apple juice," Applejack said.
"Hmm, we could probably add some cinnamon and sugar, give it an apple flavor, make it a desert," Ivan said.
The cooks did their work but kept an eye on us, clearly not trusting us too much to not wreck the place. I was determined to *not* wreck everything.
I cooked slowly and methodically with my friends, following my recipe carefully. No disasters, no spilling flour everywhere, nothing on fire. So there.
Okay, Applejack did have to stop the frying pan from flipping, but otherwise, it all went *well*.
Spike's soup smelled so good. He looked quite proud. I took a sip of the non-sausage parts and my mouth caught fire. In a good way.
"Where's Pinkie?" Applejack asked as we got ready to haul everything to the private dining room. Celestia was going to meet us there.
"She and Luna had to 'do something, tee hee'," Ivan said.
Oh dear.
We got everything set up; it all smelled so good. I took a sip of the peach brandy. Perfect.
Then Ivan took off, once we were set up and we all settled in to wait for Celestia.
She soon arrived, regally garbed and gave each of us a friendly nuzzle. "Thank you all, my dear friends," she said brightly, then sat down with us. "You are very kind to cook for me."
"We made this for Twilight, but she kinda ended up helping us cook it," Applejack said. "We also have a special dessert Ivan helped us make."
We had a wonderful dinner and Celestia chatted with us about our day. It's the first time I've gotten to really just spend time with her in a long while and I greatly enjoyed it. We got into a discussion of a magical problem which I think bored the others, but they indulged me.
Thanks, friends.
"Do you know where Pinkie is?" Celestia asked me. "I haven't seen her all day."
Oh dear.
"That doesn't bode well," Applejack said.
I have to agree.
But I trust Pinkie, so I won't go prying.
But maybe she *wants* me to pry, in order to distract me.
"Whatever it is, you're overthinking it, Twilight," Spike said, working on his soup.
I glared for a second, but then I laughed. "You're right." Let's just relax and enjoy some time with my friends.
Distantly, something blew up.
"..."
"Don't worry, they'll call me if we're needed," Celestia said. "Luna is on it."
Distantly, I heard Apple Bloom wail.
Applejack leaped to her feet.
"It's okay," Celestia said. "Luna will call me if we are needed. Let's just enjoy..." She was cut off by the sound of that strange music you hear in the castle for some reason at odd intervals. "The distant music and friends."
I felt I ought to be running to the sounds, but they died down after a bit and gradually I relaxed.
I can't just get over this instantly, but with my friends, I'll be fine. It'll be awkward, but it will be okay. And I'd decided long ago to move on from him, anyway.
He's part of my life, but not the center. He and Rarity... I want them to be happy together.
"MY PANTS!" I heard him howl distantly.
Celestia smiled and ate more of the kufo. "What an excellent meal. Thank you all."
"Thank you for coming," I told her.
It's going to be okay. I'm not alone any more.
Not while I have friends.
*************
BACK TO MARCUS POINT OF VIEW:
"Repeat after me," I said to Apple Bloom as we all laid in the gardens, somewhat stunned.
"After me," she mumbled.
"I will not mix acids and bases."
"I will not mix acids and bases," she said. "What's a base?"
"It's a kind of instrument," Sweetie said to a tree root.
"Oh, yeah, it would wreck the instrument," Apple Bloom said.
Teaching them about breaking into things is not going to be easy or safe.
But that's my life in a nutshell, really.
Time to get Rarity out of the tree.
****************
"The truth can hurt, but it's better than lies," Luna told me; we were meeting in her office; the kids had been packed off to bed, which is much, much harder than you'd... okay, I'm sure you know how hard it is.
Especially since the three with Cutie Marks think they ought to be full-blown adults now.
"It's nice to have that burden removed," I told her. "Much as I hate having to hurt them with the truth, I was getting pretty weighed down by it all."
"I know," Luna said. "I know." She sighed, staring off, probably at cosmic vistas we mortals can't see. "While we continue to gather intelligence and plan, Celestia and I would like you to begin teaching the children how not to get themselves killed, since they seem quite set on a life of adventure."
I laughed nervously. "They're really too young to get into the kinds of things they do."
"Yes, but they won't stop short of us locking them up. Sometimes, you can't fight fate, you can just try to guide it. You have experience teaching pony children, so you're the natural choice. I've asked Ivan to help as well."
Ahahaha. "Okay. I'm going to be doing a lot of things for people, but I'll take all the time I can to work with them."
She nodded. "Good luck."
Going to NEED IT.
**************
"I don't know if we're going to have time for a musical," I told Lyra. She wants me to be in her musical she's apparently been working on FOREVER.
"We can work on it now," she told me. "And then really get it rolling once your big quest is over."
Bon-Bon was busy reading a glossy pamphlet while sprawled out on some pillows. 'A guide to Canterlot celebrities'. "I'm sure he's very busy."
"Doesn't matter, he owes us," Lyra said. Which I do. "And I know he loves to sing."
"I do not love to sing," I told her firmly. My voice isn't that great for it.
"Which is why we always had to manuever you into it."
I remember. I remember very much.
So no flashback is needed AT ALL.
"Anyway, we can even make it somewhat educational; that way, we can rope Twilight into it."
I winced. Oh, that won't be awkward AT ALL.
"That's likely to end with your set on fire," Bon-Bon observed.
"I can handle Twilight," Lyra said confidently. "I can play her like a violin."
Lyra looked quite aggravated when Bon-Bon began rolling around laughing.
"So what's the plot?" I asked.
"Depends on the day of the week," Bon-Bon said, turning back to her pamphlet.
Lyra twitched. "See, that's the hard part. I have all these GREAT songs, but I'm not so good at the plotting part."
"Well, hit me with the music, then we can figure out the plot."
Bon-Bon's laughter did not make this easy.
*************
"Ghost story," Scootaloo told me. "A soldier goes off to war and his wife dies, but she becomes a ghost and possesses someone, then they fall in love again, but her jealous old boyfriend exorcises her, and then the soldier is killed by the woman who got possessed and then their souls go off to the planes together!"
"Wow, that's grim," Sweetie said weakly.
It was the next day and Ivan and I had assembled everyone who was going to be studying the joy of traps and how not to be killed by them with us. This meant Rarity, Applejack (to my surprise), and the CMC.
"The best romance stories end in fights to the death and apocalyptic destruction," Scootaloo said. "Otherwise, they're all disgustingly mushy. This would get to START with doom and destruction and only go up from there!"
We'd gotten sidetracked into the musical.
"Sweetie, you should help out Lyra," Apple Bloom said to her. "You're good at singing and music."
"Well..." Sweetie said hesitantly.
"I'm sure she'd love to have your help," I told her.
Dinky whispered to Sweetie and her eyes crossed. "Okay, I'll do it." Sweetie said determinedly.
"You should do a play which exposes the menace of the Oards," Dinky said firmly. No.
Though apparently there's more reason to think they're real, even if those were fake.
Then it hit me. Has anyone actually interrogated all those prisoners? Best to check on it after this.
************
"Marquetta and her agents were in contact with all three groups and basically pointed out the connection between you, Twilight, and Lyra," Celestia told me in her office. "She has a price on you and so does Thyatis. Minrothad, I think, plans to collect directly."
Ahahaha.
"Can you get Thyatis to back off? I can do things for them later once this is resolved if we need me to do that."
"I have let them know that if any bounty hunters tear up my lands looking for you, they will have cause to regret it," Celestia said. "We will have to offer them something in the longer term as you said, though."
"Are we going to Sind?" I said. "Or maybe try to use that tower as bait?"
"You will be going to Sind first to carry a warning from me to the Radhirajah. I have other agents who will investigate there," Celestia said. "Your group is not well adapted for subtle infiltration and spying."
Yes, I can't and won't argue that.
"Since I do not wish to simply wait for them to make a big move, I think your idea of investigating that tower is a good one," Celestia continued. "It may draw them out and if it does not, we'll have some useful items to work with."
And TREASURE. Treasure makes everything better. "I'll talk to everyone about that."
"You should do some research with Twilight, if you think you can work together closely," Celestia said. "I know it will be awkward." She sounded and looked sad. "But with time, I think you will be able to be good friends again."
I need to get her a boyfriend. Then she won't care about the past, I thought. Unfortunately, I seem to mostly know women in this city. Though if we're still here, there's those guys who she danced with at the club.
We'll have to see, I thought.
"And then there's the final item on the agenda," Celestia said.
"Yes?"
"Those babies you agreed to make with me," she said, grinning.
Never going to live that down ever.
****************
I went to see Fluttershy to take care of some unfinished business. There's a druid grove in Canterlot, but it's not what you'd expect. You have to go to the north face and enter a cave. The north face, for those unfamiliar with Canterlot, is the cliff wall the city sticks out from. The plateau's walls run roughly west and eastward, with the top of the plateau north of the city. Halfway up the plateau, a huge spur of land juts outward from the plateau; Canterlot is built atop that spur. There is also 'Upper Canterlot' and 'Lower Canterlot' at the top and bottom of the plateau respectively, connected by stairs, ramps, and elevators.
There is also 'Deep Canterlot', the part of the city which is actually underground. Various caves and tunnels extend under the plateau from the city; the one controlled by the druids runs from the western end of the city northwards.
Rather than being disguised in her usual way, Fluttershy had put on a brightly colored hooded cloak with grape vines embroidered all over it and donned a golden torc, studded with jewels. She had long bracers on her forelegs, made of silver with a rabbit engraved onto each of them. I had to help her put them on.
She greeted the ponies on guard and they bowed to her; I get the impression she's a good way up the ladder of druidism. I don't know a lot about it, but I have heard high ranking druids have to fight each other for their jobs, which seems like a weird way to ensure the person with the most harmony with nature gets the job.
The druid grove here turned out to be a giant mushroom forest; mushrooms ranging from a few inches to dozens of feet tall grew in a huge cavern, maybe four or five hundred feet tall; there were crystals studded in the ceiling which gave off a soft light and the air was very humid. A half-dozen pegasi druids flitted about overhead, manipulating the air currents to keep everything moist (I think).
There were hardly any unicorns here, but a roughly even mix of pegasi and earth ponies. "Oh, unicorns usually tend to get into arcane magic if they want more than their basic powers," Fluttershy told me. "The bond pegasi have to the sky and earth ponies to things of the earth draw us to druidic studies. In the past, when we all lived in herds, druids were very important to survival."
She paused to help a lizard out of a hole it had fallen into. I carefuly filled in the hole with dirt to avoid a recurrance. Our progress was slow as we had to stop and tend to various fungi, then help various animals: bats and lizards mostly.
"Do many ponies live underground?" I asked.
"Mostly earth ponies, but not many of those," Fluttershy said. "There are some dwarven colonies on the north side of the plateau. Most of the population of North Marech is actually dwarves, because most of the surface belongs to the Buffalo."
The ground squished under my feet; this whole cave is pretty moist and wet, the ground oddly spongey, depressing when you step on it and then springing back up as you walk. Fluttershy seemed to hardly disturb the soil, even though she weighs as much as I do, maybe more. I, on the other hand, had to listen to a weird suction noise every time I pulled a foot up.
It would, in fact, be creepy if there weren't happy, brightly colored ponies everywhere.
Though some of them gave me the evil eye. Given druids typically wear leather if they don't run around naked or shapeshifted... Hey...
"Don't druids of your power normally learn some shapeshifting?" I asked Fluttershy.
"I'm too good at it," she said embarrassed.
"*Too* good at it?" I asked.
"I sort of tend to start thinking I am whatever I turn into," she said, laughing nervously. "Until it wears off. Angel tells me I made a good bunny, though."
"Angel?" I asked.
"My dear cute little rabbit friend," she said brightly. "He's a good boy. I'm very proud of him."
"What are we looking for?" I asked.
She paused, then laughed nervously.
She totally forgot. AAAAAAAAAAAAA.
"We just need a quiet corner," she said.
An hour later, when there were no lizards left to help, no bat left behind, we found a little nook where a bunch of huge twenty foot mushrooms grew skyward in a crescent moon pattern. We settled down on some moss. Which promptly stained my pants. Really, I'm a mess of mushroom bits and moss stains. Good thing I have a lot of treasure.
"Okay, what do I have to do?" I asked her.
"First, lay out your sword here," she said.
I did so, laying it out on a large, roughly circular rock which sat in the middle of this little shrine. The rock had runes carved around the outside, but it was otherwise basically unshaped. Which is likely why they like it.
"Now, put your arm down on the altar," Fluttershy said. "I am going to have to cut you just a tiny bit."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
No, no, be calm, don't panic, it's Fluttershy, she wouldn't hurt anyone.
I imagined Dragonfly and twitched.
She patted me gently. "I know. I had to go through this for each of my initiations. They had to chase me for an hour the first time."
DO NOT RUN AWAY.
I pulled my sleeve back and laid my arm down and she took my sword with her mouth. I tried to control my breathing. The sword wobbled a moment and Fluttershy switched grips. Horse and pony mouths are strangely nimble. I closed my eyes; if I watch, I will kill myself with a heart attack.
I felt the sword very gently tap my flesh and couldn't help but smile. Then it dug in and I winched but clenched my mouth shut. It's just a little cut. I couldn't tell if I felt myself bleed or I just hallucinated it out of expectations.
Then Fluttershy put my sword down and began to chant; I peeked and saw blood float in the air between my sword and the small cut on my hand, which throbbed gently. I began to sing along, the song dictating the words to me, and our voices intertwined; I could hear a faint chorus now, as if the mushrooms had joined in and now other druids began to appear, singing as well.
Memories flickered through my mind, threatening me with a damn flashback. I could remember a woman, carefully braiding my beard. I remembered my foot caught in rigging, dangling from a mast as someone laughed. The platform shook under my foot as I chased the bully who had stolen the belt mother gave me. A hat, a glorious hat and it was ALL MINE... until I got thrown in jail. A cow, a cow the size of a castle, and its moo shook the heavens... wait, that was real? Was someone messing with me?
I was standing in a great cloud city, trying to hide, Jade Tips had been harrassing me all day, mocking me because I wasn't any good at flying. I've never really been into flying.
Also, for some reason I was female. And a pony. And...
I could see Fluttershy's eyes widen with horror. Flashes of her life flickered before me and she clearly saw bits of mine. She started crying and now I felt guilty and my eyes were watering in sympathy to her tears. The memories of being kicked and mocked didn't help either.
How can she be so kind when she was treated so badly?
There was a smile, the gentle comforting wings of her father, who flew so high and so far; he was gone a lot but when he was here, he would always hold her and comfort her and protect her.
Her mother, who often nagged her tremendously but also loved her greatly. Whatever might go wrong outside her home, when she was home, she was loved.
And then her one true friend, hard as she might be to deal with, Rainbow Dash, who stood up for her.
And then I saw her moment of rebirth; she fell from the sky and butterflies saved her. She saw an entire world that she had not known and it awoke things in her she had not known existed.
I could feel the love in her heart for all the things of this world, a deep and powerful love that when roused by dangers to them could be fierce, but normally burned with a warm, gentle glow.
I couldn't help but smile, but then I realized things were not going well for Fluttershy, who looked utterly horrified by whatever she was seeing. I don't even know what she was remembering. Well, I'm not sure if it's 'remembering' when it is her seeing my memories.
She slumped for a few seconds, then looked determined and rose up. The song now rose to its crescendo, and I got a flash of her staring down a dragon until it apologized. I suddenly wondered what her and the beholder in a staring contest would have been like.
I smiled a little at that.
And then there was a wrenching and I felt power EVERYWHERE, swirling around us in a great storm; the moss below us suddenly turned into grass and the mushrooms changed colors and Fluttershy's eyes glowed green and now I felt something more, something higher, the power of Djaea, the power behind Druids, Mother Nature herself, who I had met briefly.
She was pleased by Fluttershy but by Dragonshy as well, for she was kind with one hand and cruel with the other, for she was nature in all its glories and shames, the gentle heat of spring and the boiling heat of summer, the howling storm and the gentle rain.
I felt her touch upon me and the sword glowed and then I sagged, vines sprouting around me, fat with grapes as I stared at them. Then I tried one.
Delicious!
The sword pulsed gently and I could feel the power settle into it.
And then it all faded and the singing ended. Fluttershy licked my cut and it vanished; I felt a tiny trickle of power when it happened.
Then she hugged me tightly; most of the observing druids left, but one old earth pony stallion with grey mane and coat and a platinum torc waited patiently, watching and leaning on a staff.
"Oh Marcus, how could you even live like that?" she said, horrified.
"Humans are tough and I forgot most of it," I told her.
She held me for a long time and I started crying because she was crying. When the storm passed, the old pony was still watching us and I wondered why. I gently brushed back Fluttershy's mane. "Thanks," I told her. "It's strange, I can feel the power in it, now."
She adjusted my hat, then let go. "I need to talk to Bitter Leaf before we go."
"We can stay a while if you want to finish exploring," I said, then bowed to Bitter Leaf, who nodded to me.
Bitter Leaf approached us. "Who are you?" he said bluntly to me.
"I am Special Agent Samus Marcus, agent of Celestia and Luna. And this is the Sword of Minroth." I brandished it, then sheathed it. "I... umm... sorry about the sudden redecoration."
"The will of Djaea is not to be denied by us," Bitter Leaf said, then frowned. "You bear a whiff of ill omen," he said flatly.
"I have had a rough life," I said apologetically.
He studied me; his piercing green eyes seemed to look right through me.
I stared back, studying him. My body shivered; he didn't seem too friendly, and I am guessing his torc designates higher rank than Fluttershy. He's probably the boss here. His body was covered with scars, I could see now, though his coat tended to hide them. But you could see them if you looked for a while. He had seen many fights.
He looked at Fluttershy briefly, then at me. "Will you drag her down to disaster as well, stormcrow?"
"Which one of us will actually be there when she needs help and which one of us won't?" I asked him, irritated by his accusation.
Even if it's probably true, dammit.
"Marcus is a gentle soul and my friend," Fluttershy said. "I... I will take my chances." She shuffled back and forth on her feet, but now struck a pose that I could tell was her imitating the way Rainbow Dash stands when she says something bold.
Bitter Leaf frowned at me and I smiled back. SCORE.
I shouldn't gloat, but I am totally gloating.
"We shall see, stormcrow, we shall see," he said irritably and walked away.
"Is he always such an ass?" I asked her as we started to head out.
"I don't see him much," Fluttershy said. "But he's basically my boss in the druidic order. He oversees all the druids of Equestria."
Urgh. Great, the Grand Druid of Equestria is on my case. That can't be good.
"He's kind of disappointed I haven't challenged him for his job yet," Fluttershy said. "But I'm happy overseeing the Ponyville area."
"Could you win?" I asked.
"Probably not but most druids my rank would have tried by now. But I'm not really ambitious," Fluttershy said. "And I'd have to leave my friends."
Like Helga did us to follow her dream and her love. I shouldn't begrudge her that. Usually, I don't, but sometimes I miss her very much. "I know how that goes," I told her.
"Anyway, umm..." She looked at me as we walked through the moss and the fungi. Squelch, squelch, squelch. She still moved lightly and I still made noises and self-fixing holes.
"I get the impression you saw some things," I said softly.
"You too," she said, turning a little red.
"You had a rough childhood," I told her sympathetically, patting her back.
"You had a rough adulthood," she said, eyes wide. "You lost your herd so many times. How could you bear it?" she said, pained.
"Humans are tough. We're not as dependent on each other as you. And we have a strong, strong urge to survive. And I tended to forget a lot of it. I expect I'd just be crumpled in a ball if I didn't." My voice wobbled a bit, remembering past disasters. "We fall down a lot, get up, dust ourselves off and go on."
She reared up and gave me a pony hug, holding me silently while I relaxed against her. I didn't cry, though she did. Pain fades with time but it was fresh for her. "Thank you," I said softly.
"Let's go see everyone," she said. "That will cheer you up."
That's true. It's strange, being in a fairly stable situation.
But it's nice. To have people I can rely on.
And who would never, ever try to trade me for a really big hunk of cheese.
Don't ask.
*************
"And the man didn't even think Marcus was worth as much as the cheese!" Fluttershy said, having regaled everyone at dinner with YET ANOTHER story I would rather forget.
Ack.
"What kind of cheese?" Scootaloo asked. "If it was, say, a good blue cheese, I'd agree, but if it was just something like cheddar, no way."
Thanks, Scootaloo.
"Alphatian green and black cheese," I said. "You have to milk basilisks to make it and it has little flecks that look like onyx but taste like chocolate in it. I have to say it is really good."
Scootaloo drooled onto her salad.
We were all in the royal dining hall; Celestia was dining with the ambassadors from the three kingdoms of the Northlands and their families; they were all close to killing each other. Celestia had the kind of smile I suspected meant 'I have to do this but I would actually rather be running for my life on fire than be here'.
Or it would mean that on me.
"Oh that is SO good," Twilight said. "Mother gave me a small box of it for the Sun's Ebb celebration one time." Sun's Ebb is the shortest day of the year; it's a big party and everyone gives each other presents. Then she glanced at me and looked away.
We hadn't talked to each other; she's not ready, I think. This was the first time we'd actually dined together since my big reveal.
I could see Herr Otto glaring daggers at me from the table he was at; Dona Carlotta looked at me, frowned, and looked away.
Dammit.
"I learned a new spell," Dinky said proudly. "It's really cool."
"What does it do?" Apple Bloom asked curiously.
"It lets anypony walk on clouds! So now I could make a cloud and we could all ride around on it!" Dinky said excitedly.
"Sweet, we won't need the balloon to go to the South Pole!" Scootaloo said.
Well, this is going to make running herd on them harder.
"So where have you been, Pinkie?" Twilight asked her. "You keep vanishing all day."
She put a hoof to her lips. "It's a secret between me and Princess Luna."
What on Mystara could they be up to?
"We'll need the unicorns once we perfect it," Pinkie said.
Twilight got her curious face, and now I did too. "What is it?" Twilight said.
"It's a secret," Pinkie sing-songed, then dug into her linguini in marinara sauce. "Mmm, good."
Dinner was Caurenzian style, which meant lots of noodles, tomatos, sauces, broccoli, and cauliflower.
"Brains," Scootaloo moaned as she ate her cauliflower, then laughed.
Soon all the kids were doing it and all the other tables were staring.
At least it kept Fluttershy from telling horror stories about my life.
Fluttershy paused and studied her food, looking worried. "Didn't you get poisoned by a meal like this one time?" she said nervously.
"Celestia's cooks would not poison us, and yes," I said, wincing as it now came rushing back to me. "I wouldn't recommend eating with any Caurenzian nobles, though."
"You ever encountered anything that didn't try to kill you?" Applejack asked me, amused.
Thanks, Applejack.
"Well, none of you," I said. "Or Helga. Or Ivan. Or Dona Carlotta, though her relatives tried a few times. Some other friends. But I have lived a dangerous life."
"Well, you're safe with us," Rainbow Dash said.
"Thanks," I said and immediately a soup bowl flew through the air and landed on me.
"..."
The staff person, a yellow coated, green maned mare with a cutie mark of a soup bowl said, "I am so sorry," in a manner clearly not sorry at all. "I'll have someone come clean you up."
What was THAT about?
"Don't ever take up prophecy, Dashie," Pinkie said cheerfully.
Rarity began picking tomatos and mushrooms and carrots off me, while Dash began yelling at the maid, who didn't seem to care. Dash followed her as she headed out. I tried to dry myself off. Not much luck there.
"I'm going to have to change," I said. "I am just a disaster."
"I'll help you," Rarity said.
"Thanks, dear," I told her and we headed out.
"She did that deliberately," Rarity said, frowning.
"I know," I said. "I don't even know her."
"I will get to the bottom of this," Rarity said. "I promise you that."
"Thanks," I told her. Then we went and got clean and I sent my poor suit to be drycleaned.
*************
Fluttershy asked me to watch the moon raising ceremony with her, so I did. She rambled on about the two moons of Mystara, their influence on tides and weather, and the continuing contest for influence over the visible moon by various Immortals. "Isn't it neutral ground, since the Immortals have a city there?" I said to her.
"Yes, but the whole idea of the moon has power," she said.
I could feel the power of the moon raising. It can't actually be raising the moon but it does something. That produces a lot of power. Maybe it draws on belief and stores it for future use?
"So what's really on your mind?" I asked her. Fluttershy is not the type to give lectures.
"Well, I thought..." She licked her lips nervously. "If you don't mind."
I waited a few seconds, but she just looked at me expectantly and I wondered if somehow I had blanked out thirty seconds or so very, very quickly.
"You didn't actually say what you thought," I said hesitantly.
"You want to talk about it?" she said.
And I understood. "Okay, we can go to the gardens and talk," I told her. Rarity had said she would be 'busy' tonight. Number one rule of relationships, you need time together, but you also need some space. Dating doesn't mean being glued to each other's flesh every second.
We headed to the gardens after the ceremony and found a tree. "What is it like to be human?" she asked as we settled down under it.
"You could try it, you know," I told her.
She looked very nervous. "It seems very sad."
"It isn't all bad," I told her. "Human dynamics are different. It often causes us to go astray but it can lead us to greatness too. There's a longing in our soul not easily satisfied; some achieve greatness trying to fill it and some sink into darkness."
"A longing for what?" Fluttershy asked.
"I don't know. There's a hole and we all try to find things to fill it. It's why I have wandered so long," I told her, then looked up at the sky; weather ponies were busy shaping the weather, while Dash floated on a cloud, watching them.
"I'm very content," Fluttershy said. "I have found my place and I like it."
"Humans never get to be like that. We're always looking," I told her.
"But now you have a cutie mark," she said, tapping my butt gently. "But you're still looking?"
"It's the nature of my cutie mark to be a searcher," I told her. "That being said, I aim to set down some roots here. Even though... it always ends badly for me. But, umm... you heard the song."
"I was just a little jealous, wishing someone would sing that for me," Fluttershy confessed, then squeaked, "I'm sorry."
"It's strange, like I tapped into music that already existed," I told her. "And it sang me. I had to give it permission but we had... It was like I was part of a greater whole."
"That's how I feel when I use my druidic magic," Fluttershy said. "I become part of nature in all its glory and terror." Only Fluttershy could make nature's terror sound 'cute'.
"Being a pony felt a little like that, but not as much," I told her.
"Being with your herd strengthens you," Fluttershy said. "We can feel each other's emotions through scent, which is why panic or joy can be infectious within a herd. By smelling us, our smelling you, you became fully part of our herd while you were a pony."
That made sense. "Humans have friends, but our smell is poor and you can never be entirely sure how people feel. It makes building trust very important and makes us slower to give trust. I trust you, Fluttershy. But normally, it takes me a lot longer to give people my trust. But you all showed you were very trustworthy." And I knew ponies are generally trustworthy. Mind you, this makes the ones that are not much, MUCH more effective at conning people.
She smiled. "Thank you. How do you even... So you have to guess how people feel?" She paused. "Ponies get fooled too sometimes, but we're usually pretty accurate."
"Look at body language, how they speak, if they look in your eyes or not, but yes. You know how I am feeling right now better than any other human could," I said. I remembered her smell, though. Butter.
How does she know how tasty ponies are???
Fluttershy took a deep sniff suddenly and looked worried. "Do you sme... no, you can't," she said, then frowned. "I smell Celestia but also something strange."
"Strange?"
"Like a pony but not," she said.
"A deer? A gazelle? Elk, maybe?" I guessed.
Celestia, a knot of courtiers, and a huge stallion, as big as Celestia, with a glossy black mane and coat came into view, moving across the gardens as Celestia and her guest spoke. He was not an Alicorn, but he was as big as Celestia. Fluttershy frowned and moved back, then forced herself to move forward, to where she was between me and them. I now noticed, he had draconic ears, though covered with hair; he was probably Vermicoritax.
I could see someone else, hidden in a tree. Herr Ukvarth, who I do not trust. If he was armed, he hid it, wearing raggedy looking brown and green clothing, well suited for tree hiding. I pointed him out to Fluttershy.
She frowned at him, and we kept our eyes on him until Celestia and Vermicoritax passed out of sight. He didn't do anything, just watched them, then quietly vanished. So he's a mage of substantial strength; I felt him teleport.
"Should we tell Princess Luna?" Fluttershy said.
"Best to make sure," I told her.
****************
"We know. I have someone keeping him under watch," Princess Luna said. "But thank you for telling me." She was busy pouring over endless rows of figures.
"What's that?" I asked.
"Trade reports. Celly handles diplomacy, I give her the ammunition," Princess Luna said. She spread her hooves expansively over the reports. "This is just a summary, of course. The Minister of Trade's staff compiles all these, then I use the master report to arm Celly and our diplomats from the Foreign Office with the info needed for negotiations. We're going to need to import more grease and cranes from Aalbaan, the question is how much."
"Equestria imports cranes?" Fluttershy said with interest. "Cranes live in wetlands and we're short on wetlands; the main one is in North Marech. Has something happened to the local cranes?"
The area around the Hoof Lakes in the northwestern part of the plateau is a mix of wetlands and wet forest. The Buffalo retreat there in winter to camp, then roam the plains and hills during the summer. In return for trade goods, they allow the ponies of North Marech to fish on the lakes, since the Buffalo can't eat meat. (The ponies can't either, but they trade it to Sind for the hay and grains that don't grow so well in the area. Though they do grow some rice in the wetlands, I think.)
I couldn't tell you about the cranes beyond 'long legs, flies'. Biology is not my specialty.
"Construction. The Aalbaneese build a lot of machinery, like us, and have a tremendous talent for it," Luna said. "We import a lot of enchanted and mechanical machinery from them. And Herr Sigisimund and Pinkie and I have been working on a project together."
One of those things is NOT like the others, I thought. "Pinkie?"
"It will be revolutionary if it works, but it has problems," Princess Luna said.
"We'll let you finish your work," Fluttershy said.
"See you later," Princess Luna said warmly. We bowed and departed.
***********
Fluttershy and I talked for a while, but then I had to do my next duty. Try to keep the Cutie Mark Crusaders from being a threat to themselves and others.
Ahaha.
Ivan and I rounded them up and Ditzy helped keep them trapped in the room; like a gas, they expand to fill all available space. I have to admit I envy them their endless energy.
We'd set up 2 simple door lock and needle traps (each on its own door). Except the needle was replaced with a bolt that would give a bit of a whack if you set it off. Enough to be something to avoid, but not something to get young fillies badly hurt, resulting in angry parents KILLING US.
Dinky studied the lock suspiciously. "This is too simple."
"Too simple?" Ivan said, confused. So was I.
Apple Bloom removed the bottom hinges on the door, then tried to get at the top but couldn't reach it. "Clever," I said. "But one, you're not tall enough and secondly, the hinges should be on the side of the door you are NOT on."
"You put me here!" she protested.
"Put the hinges on. Thinking outside the box is good but you need to learn the direct approach too," I said.
She has to work the lockpicks with her mouth. We made them bigger picks as otherwise, she couldn't see the picks to work them. She's actually pretty good at this; the door was soon unlocked and the trap didn't go off.
"The trap is right here," Dinky said, pointing to it. "Which is far too obvious. If I can find this, anyone can." Given she's not googly-eyed like her mother, I am not sure why she thinks just 'anyone' could find it. We didn't make it impossible but it wasn't trivial, either.
"The real challenge is picking the lock without setting the trap off," Ivan said, trying to be patient.
"That's what I'm SUPPOSED to think, yes," Dinky said.
"Stop acting like Marcus and PICK THE LOCK," Ivan said. You can tell he's never been a teacher.
Sweetie now stepped up to my door. She studied the lock carefully, then laid a spread of cards and studied it; I felt magic flowing and then she mumbled to herself and laid another spread, then carefully selected pick number three and with some effort picked the lock. "Good job," I said, ruffling her hair and smiling.
She smiled back brightly. "Thanks, Marcus."
Dinky began to work the lock but eyed the door dubiously and kept stopping and jumping back. Is she normally this paranoid and I didn't notice?
"Come on, I'm dying of old age here!" Scootaloo said.
Rarity was waiting for her chance at the door; right now she was busy sewing an outfit and watching the kids work. I think she rather enjoys the challenge of this sort of thing.
"Wishing you could go back to your shop?" Sweetie asked her sympathetically.
"Yes," Rarity said. "Or that we had a way to move forwards." She sighed. "Canterlot is wonderful but I keep worrying about my store."
"What ARE we waiting for? We should just go root the dragon and the evil twins out of their evil fortress of evil, KAPOW," Scootaloo said. "If that didn't get us our cutie marks, NOTHING would!"
"Dear, I know you would expect the Oards or the Giff to put backup traps, but this really is just a simple trap," Ditzy said patiently to her daughter.
"You always think that and then you end up on fire, Mom," Dinky said. Slowly, ever so slowly, she unlocked the door.
Scootaloo was rocking back and forth, side to side on her hooves, looking frustrated and bored. "Get on with it before I have to unlock the door with your horn," Scootaloo said.
Twist stepped up on my end, then put some candy in her mouth, chewing until it became a disgusting mess; then she crammed it into the lock.
"..." I stared. What on earth?
Then she breathed on it and it hardened with a clump sticking out. She turned it, having made a key and pulled it out, then ate it.
"Lock defeated," Twist said cheerfully.
"Scootaloo, you come take a shot at mine," I told her.
"Dinky, you should be done by now," Ivan said. "You can do this. If you stop being so overly cautious."
Well, it's good to be cautious. But she is overdoing it. Even by my standards.
Scootaloo took the picks in her mouth. She tried to finish as quickly as Apple Bloom, but the trap went off on her. This happened three more times.
"You have to go slowly," I told her. "Patience is everything."
"Apple Bloom got it QUICKLY," she said, frustrated.
"And Dinky is still trying," I told her.
Sweetie and Rarity were talking quietly about Ponyville and people they knew, but Rarity now looked up. "Patience is crucial to any sort of delicate work; with practice, you can achieve mastery. Impatience leads to ruined cloth and torn seams."
"Failing SUCKS," Scootaloo said, frustrated.
"Not everyone can do everything well," Rarity said. "You have to find what you're good at it."
"I am TRYING!"
"What you do is you try for five minutes, then give up," Rarity said sharply. "I spent years learning to sew before I got my cutie mark; I studied with mother from the moment I could lift a needle."
"Sweetie got hers BAM, just like that!" Scootaloo said angrily. "She'd never even tried it!"
"I kind of like trying new things myself," I said. "Being able to do a little of everything makes me flexible," I continued.
"Don't you regret not studying harder to be a better wizard?" Rarity said to me questioningly.
Sweetie started to look worried. Every time Rarity and I have a disagreement, she starts to come unglued.
"Yes," I confessed, frowning. Being hoist by your own words is never fun.
Ditzy stepped up. "Come on, let me do this," she said to Dinky.
"No, no, I have it, I just need time!" Dinky said. I heard another tumbler tumble. "I'm almost done."
Ditzy and Dinky began fumbling at the lockpick. "We can't make the others wait," Ditzy said urgently.
"Mom, I have it! I have it!" Dinky said.
"Umm..." Ivan began then decided to just stay out of it.
Scootaloo was still working on her lock when Ditzy tripped, banged the door with her head, the lockpick slipped and the lock clicked open.
"Good enough," Ivan said quickly.
"Damn this lock," Scootaloo grumbled.
This really is unlikely to ever be her strong point. Scootaloo looked thoughtful. She backed up and then flexed.
"Don't headbutt the door," I told her.
"Oh man!"
"Success!" Dinky said.
"And there was no other trap," Ditzy said triumphantly. "Now you have to buy me muffins!"
Dinky grumbled and retreated to let someone else try as Ivan reset it.
Scootaloo grimaced. She was still working on the door when Rarity easily picked the other one and Ivan sent her to work on a complicated one; she's good at this and improving swiftly. She's got patience and precision, just what you need.
Apple Bloom isn't very patient, but she's got a natural knack for this. Ivan put her on a puzzle box we'd made and worked with her, while I tried to coach Scootaloo through this. Sweetie started to come over but I shook my head at her.
"I can do this!" Scootaloo said fiercely.
She has drive, just not focus. I know how that is.
It's how I kept going forward without thinking about where I was going or what I left behind me.
"What happens if we fail on this one?" Apple Bloom asked.
"Traps don't come with a warning label," Ivan said.
Scootaloo finally got it to work. "HAH!" She looked at her flank. "Dammit!"
Before I could say anything, she stormed out.
"Scootaloo!" I shouted.
Ditzy went after her, to my surprise and I decided to let her handle it.
***************
Scootaloo Point-of-Viewaloo:
I heard someone coming up behind me as I stormed off, so I started running. Stupid Marcus the lousy teacher with only TWO LEGS can't keep up with me.
Except I could hear him keeping up, so I ran faster.
FASTER.
Nothing stopped him, nothing! "Shouldn't you be busy smiling at Sweetie like she was your girlfriend or something?" I shouted angrily at him.
I'm not jealous but a teacher shouldn't play favorites.
"I'm not Marcus," Ditzy said.
I looked back, saw Ditzy and crashed into a wall.
Ditzy helped me up. "Want to go flying?"
I was nervous about this. Ditzy is very kind and loving and basically a dimwit. And how can she steer with those eyes? Dinky's not too bright either, but she's kinda... she grows on you, I guess.
She doesn't drop anvils on people either.
On the other hand... flying... My stupid stubby wings flapped with anticipation. Stupid body.
They keep doing things I don't want lately. It's really hard to deal with. "Sure, I can help you out," I said, playing it cool.
My wings fluttered more.
STOP THAT.
I hopped on her back and rode as she rose into the air, zooming down the hallway; she cut a corner into a room and then out a window and into the sky. YEAH!
We zoomed around, wobbling and moving in weird arcs and turns; I kept thinking she should crash but somehow we never hit anything. My wings were flapping like crazy. STOP IT. I look like a little filly all excited by this.
I'm not a little filly.
I'm cool.
Rainbow Dash is cool, so I have to be cool.
"Why do you fly like this?" I asked Ditzy.
"Every pegasus flies with her wings," Ditzy said, now flying sideways as I clung on. We zoomed through the trees of the garden, nearly hitting all of them but somehow dodging them all. I could feel my heart pound with excitement but I kept my stupid wings under control.
"Harder! Push harder!" I heard Pinkie shout.
"I am pushing as hard as I can!" Some guy... Hairy Sigbloom. Something like that. He has a stupid name, which fits being a stupid human. He can't... wait, what are they doing?
"Oh dear," Ditzy said. "You're too young to listen to this."
"I am a big pony!" Now I have to know. But jumping off when Ditzy is spiralling upwards and off towards the hedge maze is probably dangerous.
Hey, I am not crazy and I don't just go 'hey, danger, I will stick my head in it', whatever some people think.
Only if it's cool.
Falling to my injury or death is not cool.
I could hear this weird whirring noise off where Pinkie and Hairy were.
"Hey, Ditzy, is that you? We could use an extra hand... hoof... you know what I mean!" Pinkie shouted.
Ditzy turned beet red. "Are you sure that's wise? I have Scootaloo with me!"
"The more the merrier!" Pinkie said.
Ditzy wobbled and did a kind of inverted drunken figure eight.
"Just go! I'm curious!" I said.
"But you're so young," she mumbled. But she turned and flew over.
We found Hairy, Pinkie, and a bunch of humans whose names I don't know or care about, busy fiddling with a flying machine. It was kind of like a bicycle with a spinny thing on top with blades.
There were two of them, one scaled for Pinkie, one scaled for a human. Hairy sat in the human one, looking aggravated.
"Here, I need to make sure mine actually works for someone who isn't me," Pinkie said to me.
"Why would it only work for you? It's a machine. They work for everyone, right?" We spent a lot of time on the difference between 'technology' and 'magic'. Pony inventions sometimes only work for the pony who made them because of their cutie mark, you see.
Given Pinkie has balloons on her flank, I can see why she's worried it won't work for humans. "Aren't you all wizards?" I said. "You just wave a wand and say bibbety bobbety boo and then, wham, magic flight? " CHEATERS. Damn cheating wizards cheat.
I'm a pegasus! WHY CAN'T I FLY?
I love my scooter but I want my wings to do more than... and there they go again.
"Like Pinkie, I like creating ingenious things," Hairy said. "And many of my people are not wizards. Shouldn't everyone have the chance to fly?" he said.
I felt the urge to cry with frustration.
I didn't, because I am cool.
I just had my stupid wings shake their shaking shake thing.
"Anyway, I want you to try it," Pinkie said to me.
I got into it and started pedalling. It shook and then...
I rose slowly skyward.
YES!
Ditzy flew up with me. "You're doing great," she said, her eye studying every inch of the machine. And everything else as it wandered around.
Pinkie shouted instructions and soon I was zooming around. Wow, it's REALLY easy to use this. I was soon flying all over the gardens with Ditzy following me, offering a steady stream of encouragement.
I could see Dash up on a cloud, so I flew up to her. "Hey, look!" I said excitedly.
She snored.
"Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo wants to show you something," Ditzy said gently.
"Mmm, beer," Dash said to one of her legs as she rolled over.
"WAKE UP!" I shouted at her.
She started and fell off the cloud. I started down but Ditzy dove and caught her. "Are you okay?" Ditzy said.
"I'm fine," Dash said. "I meant to do that." She sounded so confident, so strong. I want to sound like that, but I...
Wings, stop it.
"Look at me fly!" I commanded and circled them, angling it for a tight turn. So easy to use this.
I can fly!
Pinkie is the best pony ever!
She was jumping and shouting about something.
Dash looked down. "Why isn't the other one working?"
"Not a clue," I told her.
We dove down and landed by the humans. "Herr Ziggy," Dash began.
"Herr Sigismund, son of Prince Jaggar," Herr Sigismund said. "A pleasure to see you again, Countess Dash."
I never knew she was a countess! That's SO COOL.
Flap, flap, flap. DAMMIT.
Stupid body.
"Scootaloo, would you like to help us with testing? We're trying to figure out why it isn't working for them," Pinkie said.
"Probably they weigh too much," I said. "And their legs are too weak."
Pinkie blinked. "But I weigh more than he does," Pinkie said.
"Yes, but you're an earth pony," I said, feeling very smart.
"That was my fear too," Herr Sigismund said. "You being a pegasus probably helps too, Scootaloo."
Him knowing my name when I didn't know his before was embarrassing. Oh wait, Pinkie just said it.
Okay, not embarrassed.
Wings stopped flapping, thankfully.
"I have an idea, but I don't know how to make it work," I said.
Dash laughed at me and I wanted to DIE. Die, die, die.
But I am stubborn. "Do we know if it can lift a human with something strong enough pedaling?" I said.
"It can lift Pinkie with enough force behind it, but that might be her Cutie Mark at work," Herr Sigismund said thoughtfully.
"Is there some way to make an engine for it?" I said. "Then the human could just steer. Or somehow make the human weigh less."
"That would be more magic," Dash said. She circled the machine, studying it. "Also, you need some stronger humans. Some earth humans. You're all unicorn humans and not very strong."
Herr Sigismund frowned, then sighed. "You're right," he said.
"Perhaps an air elemental could be bound into it to provide lift," one of the other wizards said; they'd been standing around uselessly, staring and whispering to each other. Wizards are good at standing around uselessly, I've noticed.
"That would be expensive," Herr Sigismund said.
"Make the frame out of liftwood; that would help," Ditzy said. "You'd have to mount an expedition to the Flying Forest of Davicor III, but with enough of that, I think a human could get enough lift."
"Ooh, a forest that flies?" I said.
"Never heard of it," Dash said, stretching out on the grass. "Where's that?"
"In the elemental plane of wood," Ditzy said.
"I don't think wood is an element," I said.
Ditzy looked at me intently. "It most certainly is a real place." She paused, then looked nervous. "I'm not sure if I should talk about it."
"Too late," I told her.
We were soon knee deep in one of Ditzy's confusing stories. The gist is that there is another plane and it has flying trees and soon everyone was very excited and they're going to go to another plane and get some.
Without me because I am too young! I never get to do ANYTHING cool!
But Pinkie promised I could help them test things once they have the wood. And I get to practice using this gyrocopter. With Dash supervising me!
Now THAT is going to be cool!
**************
Back to Marcus-O-Vision:
"We're going to send you all to Sind to deliver some messages to the Radirajah," Celestia said to us. "It's possible this may lead to trouble if that vision came true, so prepare yourself. It's best to warn him and I want Twilight to get a look at him and make sure he hasn't been replaced by a shapeshifter himself."
We were in a private meeting room; the CMC were off with Ditzy, Lyra, and Bon-Bon and were working on some big plan.
"I need to go to another plane that may be real or imaginary to get liftwood," Pinkie said. "But it should go quick."
"As soon as you're back, then," Celestia said. "Luna is very excited about this project, and it will give us leverage with Aalban. One of my diplomats will work on training you all in the proper protocols. Tidy Manners is very good at what he does."
Do not laugh at the diplomat, I told myself.
"Also, Marcus, I want you to go as a pony. If there are shifters around, they may mistake you for one of them and this will draw them out," Celestia said.
I laughed nervously. I get to be bait. "Yes, your highness."
"It'll be good for you," Applejack said. "Practice being naked like civilized folk."
I couldn't help but smile at that.
"Oh, I intend to dress us all up," Rarity said. "Ambassadors must look official and regal, not casual and relaxed."
"I ain't wearing nothing frou-frou," Applejack said firmly. "And my hat stays."
After my own heart.
"Don't you trust me? You liked your gala outfit, right?"
"Yeah," she said, softening a little. "Just nothing too fancy."
"Oh, THIS will be a test of my talents," Rarity said. "Pinkie, take your time inside Ditzy's head or wherever you are going. Genius cannot be rushed. This will be magnificent!"
"I will need to practice looking at shapeshifting and detecting it," Twilight said.
"Marcus can change form for your amusement," Celestia said grandly.
I am going to be VERY sore.
"I'll do it," Fluttershy said.
"Didn't you..." I began.
"I will do it," Fluttershy said firmly.
"Are you sure?" Twilight said.
"I can handle it," Fluttershy said, though her tail was shaking.
Celestia smiled warmly. "You can both do it. I have faith in you, Fluttershy."
She smiled brightly. "I have faith in you too, Princess Celestia."
I have faith I am going to ache all over.
****************
I could see Scootaloo zooming around and laughing through the window as I worked on getting sore. I felt my body wrench again and now I was a cat. I rubbed against Twilight's leg, then realized what I was doing as she turned red. "Mrowr," I said, unable to speak.
Fluttershy, on the other hand, did the same thing shamelessly, until Twilight petted her with a hoof. Unfortunately, this clearly indicated Fluttershy had lost herself again.
Twilight turned us both back to normal.
I flopped out on the floor, aching, while Fluttershy looked frustrated. "I did it again," she said softly.
"You love them so much, you join with them perfectly," Twilight said kindly.
"I'm too weak willed to keep control," Fluttershy said, frustrated. "I lose track of what I'm doing. A druid shouldn't lose control during a shift."
She could turn into all sorts of things, but she kept losing herself. That would scare me shitless.
"You can do it," I told her, trying to be supportive. I suspect she can't do it. She's too gentle and kind and her will only comes out in a really deep crisis.
"If I can stare down things, I ought to be able to do this. I bet Dragonfly can shapeshift all she wants," Fluttershy said, frustrated.
"We'll keep practicing," Twilight said. I could tell she thought the same as me, though. But she's too kind to slap Fluttershy down.
And Twilight's very much the 'keep trying until you succeed or die' type.
So I won't give up either, much as I want to.
***************
Raven-Fluttershy flew off after something shiny.
"Come back!" Twilight said.
I hopped on her back and we teleported out and started chasing her around. I touched Twilight's mind. 'We should take a break after this.'
'Not giving up,' she said stubbornly. 'You can give up,' she said irritably. 'You're good at that.'
OWW. We'd gotten on okay if awkward, but...
'Not giving up,' I said and launched myself, flying after her. She had the shiny but I TOOK it.
She stared at me, then made unhappy raven noises. I waved it around in her face and she watched it move. Then, suddenly, she lunged for it. I flew and she chased me with Twilight watching us; she started to get dizzy as we bobbed and weaved.
Finally, she got it from me, then waved it in the air and flew up into a tree, made a nest and crouched over it protectively.
Finally, she fell asleep and turned back and Twilight took her down.
"Well, it's a start," I said when she turned me back.
Twilight sighed. "I'm sorry I snapped at you."
"It's okay, I do give up too easily. But I am not giving up this time," I said. "You don't have to worry."
We looked at each other uncomfortably.
Dammit. I hate this.
"Take good care of Rarity," she said softly. "I'll take Fluttershy to her room. See you later, okay?"
"Okay," I said and headed off to go make sure the kids weren't burning the world.
************
I had to drag the kids to take a bath before dinner; they were messes. It was a 'secret' but would be 'really cool'. Lyra assured me it would be fine. I hope she's right. Pinkie and Dash and Ditzy were all gone with the expedition to get the liftwood. I hope that goes well. I felt bad they were going without the rest of us, but Celestia wanted most of us to stay here.
I dragged Fluttershy into coming with me that night to help out Bon-Bon and Twist with some candy making. Twist was getting a lesson, while Lyra and I were being grunts and Fluttershy was helping to cook, though candy is not her expertise.
Equestria candymaking is really a form of alchemy, I concluded. All sorts of odd chemicals and making things with weird properties. The candy stretching machine was almost hypnotic. In fact, Lyra had to drag me away from staring at it.
"You should have invited Rarity," Lyra told me.
"This is my atonement, not hers," I told her. "She's busy making the dresses and suits and everything."
"So you're going to be a pony for the trip?" Bon-Bon said to me as she used her tail to shake a blue powder into the pot Twist was stirring.
Distantly, I heard odd grinding noises from the garden where the rest of the kids were working.
Wait, who is supervising them???
"Yes, I am," I said. "I'm not used to staying shifted that long."
Bon-Bon said, "Before you all go, how about... since Lyra wants to try it... we could have a human form quadruple date," she said. "Just since Lyra's so curious."
"Sure," I said. "I'll ask Rarity."
"Excellent, Prof," Lyra said, rubbing her hooves together excitedly.
"Who is supervising the kids?" I asked, worried.
"Applejack," Lyra said.
Oh, that'll be fine.
Bon-Bon put me to work rolling and flattening and stretching and rolling a kind of striped candy which would eventualy end up a pinwheel candy. Very tasty.
Fluttershy was stirring another pot and whistling a happy tune, enjoying herself.
"I hear you're practicing shapeshifting?" Lyra asked her.
"Yes," Fluttershy said nervously. "It's a druidic power."
"That's really cool," Lyra said. "I would love that. But my talent is music. Which I love, but man, that's a great power."
"Thank you," Fluttershy said kindly, but I could tell she was hiding frustration.
There has to be some way to help her. I just don't know how. It seems like it would take a personality shift. And those aren't something you can just DO.
**************
"Sure," Rarity said to me when I told her of Lyra's idea. "I will want a break from work by tomorrow evening. I have been VERY busy." She told me all about it while we got ready for bed. "Don't forget, we meet with Tidy Manners in the morning."
I put a hand over my mouth to avoid laughing at the name again.
"And if you laugh at him, it won't be good manners at all."
I nodded.
"It's going to be cool in Sind," Sweetie said.
"Honey, we may have to fight our way out. You all are going to have to stay here in Canterlot with Lyra and Bon-Bon where you're safe," Rarity said firmly to her.
"Sorry. We'll bring you a souvenier," I said to her patting her head.
"I'm ready! I'm learning more stuff every day! And I did a good job on the locks, right?" she said hopefully.
"You were great, Sweetie," I told her. "But this is for the grownups."
"I am a grownup," she said, pouting.
Getting her to bed was, to say the least, difficult.
*************
Nothing like being groggy at a MANNERS meeting. Rarity and I took a while to rally, to our embarrassment. Most of the others getting yelled at for eating right out of the bowl made us both feel a little better, though.
Applejack was the worst; I got the feeling she COULD do much better, but deliberately did not. Feeling it to be 'fake'. Dash, on the other hand, was hopelessly incompetent.
Mind you, there were other issues... "I can't hold a spoon in my mouth AND eat from it at the same time!" Dash protested.
"If you eat from the bowl, the Sindhi will see you as a beast of burden," Tidy Manners said. He was a well dressed stallion in a grey suit; he wore glasses and had a blue mane and a black coat. "They are hard to deal with and I feel sorry for you all that you have to go. It will require strict self-control."
Applejack grumbled, then gripped the spoon with her hooves and wiggled around to sip from it.
"I suppose feeding each other would feel too childish," I said.
"Yeah," Applejack said, then sighed. "How big are the portions?"
"Anyone who is not a mystic eats heartily," Tidy Manners said. "Many try to restrict their eating of meat, and sentient ponies do dwell among them, so you will not go hungry. Just make sure you are clearly foreign so they will not treat you as il-jaya."
The Sindhi religion asserts Ponies (il-jaya) are humans who screwed up and were born again as a lesser sentient. This has led to a LOT of conflict with Equestria. Elephants, on the other hand, are treated as members of the warrior caste. This tends to give them a big head.
Basically, there is a caste system; if you follow your caste's rules, you're reborn in a higher caste (they think); screw up and you drop down the ladder. Drop down enough you become a pony. Orcs, goblins, etc, are the next level down.
Sind wobbles between periods where religion is very serious business and life sucks for the Ponies there and then war with Equestria usually happens and periods where the merchants are in the ascendent and basically are nice to anyone with MONEY.
A fair number of Sindhi Ponies flee to Equestria whenever the heat is on; this sometimes itself has led to wars.
I'm frankly baffled why any of them stay, but apparently, they've internalized it and believe they can't escape their fate, blah, blah.
And the state doesn't want them to leave, as they do lots of valuable work.
Sindh is too powerful for Equestria to conquer and vice-versa, so they wobble between friendly and hostile relations. Friendly of late, but I suspect Marquetta hopes to induce a flip and a war like the vision Sweetie and I had.
I hope this goes smoothly.
Applejack pursed her lips, then closed her eyes.
Her stance shifted and now her eyes didn't quite open as fully as usual. "Very good," she said, her accent gone. "Thank you very much for the food, Tidy Manners." She bowed smoothly, then took the spoon and began to feed herself in something as close to elegance as you can manage with hooves.
"Hah, she remembers!" Pinkie said, then began trying to eat with her spoon.
"Thanks, Applejack," Twilight said. "I know you don't like doing that."
"It ain... It is not honest, and I don't like it, but I will do my best for Equestria," Applejack said, shifting accents to the polished sounding Manehattanite. "Rarity, you can give me the full frou-frou, but I get to dress YOU up after this for a while."
"Fair enough," Rarity said. "I look forward to unleashing your full potential, darling."
Fluttershy studied Applejack, looking thoughtful, then got a determined look and ate as smoothly as she could.
At least if I have to do this as a horse, I will be a unicorn and will have magical hands.
We stumbled along and by the end, Rainbow Dash was rather a mess from her efforts to not end up being a mess and be polite. Definitely going to take some work. Or maybe dress her up to pretend to be fasting in public, anyway.
Ugh, if it was anywhere else, I'd be less frustrated. But the deck will be stacked against us there and I'll be part of the weak suit.
Twilight paused. "They'll tend to think Ivan is in charge, right?"
"Yes," Tidy Manners said. "You may wish to play up making him look a warrior so they don't assume he's of the servant caste."
Ivan grimaced. "Yes, let's do that."
"Don't worry, Ivan, I can handle that too," Rarity said. She sounded quite excited.
*************
The time before our trip was full of me either running herd on kids, helping Rarity work, helping Bon-Bon work, or practicing being a pony. And the date, but I'll get to that in a minute.
Applejack got me that afternoon before the date and after the manners lesson. She studied my Cutie Mark. "So what exactly does this mean?"
"Jack of all trades, more or less. Or my reincarnating. And my love of card games. And maybe a little card magic." I got my deck of cards and made it fly around like a flock of birds.
"Ever done any gardening?" she asked. I could smell her curiosity.
"Not much. I rarely manage to settle long enough for anything to grow," I told her.
She shook her head. "That's a pity. No way to live."
"I like the adventuring life," I told her.
She raised an eyebrow. "And all the screaming?"
"Relieves tension," I said, and laughed. "I know, I know. Anyway, I expect I'll have times where I'm off doing things for Celestia and times where I'm settled down peacefully. Like in our song." I could hear it when I thought about it.
She studied me. "You're a lucky man. You know that, right?"
"If I was really lucky, we'd both be human or pony to make it simple," I told her. "But we are both too stubborn to let such things get in the way."
She looked thoughtful, then said, "Well, the gardeners have agreed to let us help, so I'm gonna put you to work. Get ready to sweat."
"You know, I would think all this hair would make it hard for you to get rid of sweat," I said as we trotted off towards the gardens. There were smells everywhere, some familiar, some not. I didn't panic this time, though the unknown ones made me nervous.
"Never had no trouble with it," Applejack. Her accent was thicker than usual and I wondered if it was natural or if it was itself an affectation. Was the 'Country Girl' really any more natural than the Manehattanite? How much of it was performance?
It's the kind of thing I like to puzzle out as I want to know how people tick. So I know how to deal with them. But I'm not trying to play Applejack, so I said nothing and just listened to her ramble on.
I'd been digging things up, pulling weeds, and planting things for an hour with magic, hooves, and shovel, when she leaned on her shovel and said, "What's it like?"
I blinked at the bushes I was planting. "I think I'm following your instructions."
"All this dying, coming back to life, being someone else... how much of it is..." She struggled. "I mean, do you really think you're someone else or are you acting or what?"
"Some of both," I told her, which made her raise an eyebrow.
"Actin' and real at once?" she said, confused.
"People change over time, but I'm not sure how much of it is just me changing and how much is because of the reincarnation. Thinking about how I feel different like this, I'm not sure how much is me and how much is my body." I frowned at the thought, pawing the ground idly.
"You feel different right now?" Applejack said curiously. She began digging another hole with a shovel held by her tail.
I began digging as well. I can't do much with my tail, beyond twitch it around. But I can manipulate a shovel telekinetically, which is better anyway. I could feel magic flowing all around; this country or at least this castle is LADEN with it. The sphere of Energy loves unicorns and ponies, I'm sure.
"I do," I told her. Smelling Applejack was oddly steadying. She had a sturdy strength to her and I could feel it in a way human me can't. "Remember me panicking at the club, when before I was perfectly fine?"
She frowned at that, continuing to shovel. "Seems odd to me you'd get more scared."
"I can't smell predators when I'm human," I told her. "And, well, humans are predators. They scare us less. We kill predators." My hole was ready and I lifted the bush into it.
"A lot of humans seem pretty comfortable with killing," Applejack said, frowning. She finished her hole and now lassooed her bush and brought it around to drop in. "You should practice using your tail."
Ugh. I tried gripping my shovel with it, but the hairs would not cohere like I needed. Rarity could do this but the polymorph didn't bring this particular skill set.
Applejack looked amused as she watched me fumble. "Man, just like a little filly."
"I suspect if you turned human, I'd outdo you in fluency with my fingers," I said a little irritably. I could drape my tail around the handle but it flailed around. Finding a hole in the spell's instruction set annoyed me and made me worry what else might be wrong.
One of the things which lets me cope with this radical a shift of shape is that I don't feel powerless.
Now I did. "Dammit."
Naturally, the worst possible twist of this situation happened.
Apple Bloom wandered up. "Have you seen... Marcus, is that you?"
"Yes," I said. She studied my cutie mark, looking a little jealous, then said, "What on Mystara are you doing, Marcus?"
"Trying to pick this up," I said irritably.
"Unicorns have a harder time with their tail than their horn," Apple Bloom said.
Wait for it...
And then she easily picked it up, brandished it and dug the hole. "Just like this," she said.
Damnit!!!!!
In that moment, I understood the Crusaders better than ever before.
I'm going to have to test the limits of this so I don't count on something and hose myself.
With Apple Bloom patiently (but excitedly) teaching me how to use my tail, I managed to get it to where I could use it clumsily. This took a really long time. But probably that's pretty fast by the normal scale.
Applejack looking amused THE WHOLE TIME did not help.
"Don't give up, you're doing great," Apple Bloom assured me. She looked SO happy, I couldn't help but smile myself.
Then she checked her flank, probably for a teaching cutie mark.
"So who were you looking for?" I asked her.
"Dinky was supposed to get more nails."
"Probably got distracted," I told her. "Nails for what?"
"It's a secret," she said. "See you later!"
She ran off.
"That was right nice of you," Applejack said. "I think she liked that."
"I needed the help," I said, embarrassed.
"Well, you got a lot to learn, but I reckon Rarity will too," Applejack said.
I reckon so.
*************
Later, as I was working, I realized I smelled something familar. Rarity! My tail perked up and I said, "Hello, Rarity."
"Don't mind me, darling," she said. "I'm just going to watch for a little while," she purred.
Watch me dig up dirt and plant bushes? Then it hit me. "Why are we planting these?" I asked Applejack. "Did the summer heat kill them?"
"We don't turn up the heat enough to kill off the plants," Applejack said. "Why would we do that?"
I winced a little. Of course. I know that. But my brain is used to the rest of the world, where you take the weather you get. "Most of us don't have a choice."
Then it hit me. The sun and moon raising likely maintain the weather control systems. The moon affects tides, the sun pumps in heat... you'd want to moderate their influence.
Oooh.
"Why would... OH," Applejack said, then looked a little embarrassed. "Ivan's told me about it, but it seems kinda crazy to grow food where you can't control the weather."
"Something for both of you to remember. It's going to be REALLY hot in Sind. There's no weather control and they're naturally very hot this time of year. And Sayr Ulan will be very, very humid because of the springs." Wizards, clerics and Earth Ponies heavily terraformed the area around the capital but I don't think they have full-blown weather control.
Another thing hit me. I know the Ylari want to try to make their homeland green again... I'm surprised they haven't cut a deal with Equestria.
On the other hand, without enough pegasi... damn, now I'm curious.
"See, when you're *naked* it doesn't matter so much," Applejack said.
Rarity strode over to me. She's so beautiful when we're the same. EEEE. Especially with a lovely hat on. "We must be elegant, dear Applejack," she said grandly and then we nuzzled each other. "And wearing clothing will distinguish us from the local ponies."
Applejack frowned. "How they treat Ponies just ain't right. I don't know why they put up with it."
"Right now's one of their better periods," Rarity said. "But I agree. Hopefully, we can keep it this way. I expect Marjorie hopes to install those who support conquering us in charge." She frowned.
"Like the Rajah of Sindrastan," I said, frowning. He still enforces the caste rules very strictly in his territories and emphasizes warrior honor, blah, blah, blah. You know the type.
"Who?" Applejack said.
"One of the sub-kings of Sind," I told her. "His people ride Ponies into battle who they've bred to a larger size and very much treat Ponies as servants only."
"There was a really giant pony around here the other day," Applejack said. "He wasn't an Alicorn, just an Earth Pony but he had dragon ears."
"I think it was Vermicoritax," I said. Who must still be negotiating. Probably holding out for a bigger bribe.
Rarity and I snuggled a little longer until Applejack put me back to work.
Then the spell suddenly wore off, dumping me naked and human in the garden.
Bloody hell.
Immediate panic set in and I began calculating the least observable path to my room.
"Glory be, Marcus, you were just fine naked a minute ago."
"I was a PONY, it did not matter," I said. So totally vulnerable like this.
Rarity threw a towel around me. "Come, darling, time to get you clean before our date."
Applejack kicked some dirt onto her. "Now you have an excuse to join him. You can thank me later."
"I don't need an excuse," Rarity said grandly. Then she kicked some dirt on Applejack to my surprise. "But I always return a gift."
Soon they were both going wild while I stared in confusion; they were both laughing and finally, a now rather filthy Rarity said ruefully, "I should not have done that. But I couldn't help myself."
"Hah! I'll teach you to love dirt yet," Applejack said. "A little dirt shows you worked hard."
"The fruits of my labor show I worked hard," Rarity said. "The same for you."
"The..." Applejack now realized she'd been outflanked. "Uh, thanks," she grumbled.
"Without you, we'd starve," Rarity said graciously. "I know we fight sometimes, but I appreciate your work."
"Thanks," Applejack said more warmly.
"I'd just rather die than do it myself," Rarity continued.
Mud TO THE FACE.
Slowly, it dripped down from her face.
"It. Is. ON!" Rarity shouted and now... well, there went a LOT of our work.
Ahahahah.
*************
As I was getting ready for the date in Ivan's room (Rarity insisted I change there, why it suddenly matters NOW, I have NO CLUE. But hey, I can be flexible.), Sweetie rushed in. "You should have asked me!" she said urgently.
"Asked you what?" I said, totally clueless.
"Apple Bloom keeps bragging about teaching you to use your tail." She swished hers around. "I mean, I'm not that great with my tail, but I would love to teach you about being a pony since you keep teaching me magic stuff."
"You can help me next time," I told her kindly. "Want to help me get dressed up?"
"Sure!" she said, brightening.
I had gotten mostly suited up when there was a knock. Sweetie got it; it was a delivery pony with a package; I signed for it curiously and when I opened it... spring loaded pie to the face.
Okay, now I am getting annoyed.
"Oh no, your suit!" Sweetie said, then she glared at the box which crumpled up into a cardboard ball. "This means WAR."
Ack.
"Don't do anything foalish, Sweetie," I said, then realized I'd used Luna's favorite pun.
"A pie to one is a pie to us all!" She rushed out.
"Sweetie, WAIT!"
Too late.
I decided to send a message to Luna just in case. Pies may be flowing in this castle tonight.
I know Rarity was going to look into it; I'd best ask her.
Twilight stuck her head in, looking nervous. "Fluttershy and I are going down to the city; if you need us, Spike can send us a letter."
"Quadruple date tonight," I told her. "Rarity, Lyra, Bon-Bon, and I are going out. You two have fun on your date."
"It's not a date! We're not into each other!" Twilight said frantically. "It's not.. it's a... we're going to... ahahaha."
I blinked. What?
"Nothing unusual at all!" She bolted.
I took a moment to detect magic and make sure I wasn't radiating fear into others.
Ivan finished his shower. "Luna, Twilight, Fluttershy, and I are going down to the city. With Luna undercover, of course, so we don't get mobbed."
I grinned at him. "Uh huh."
"What?" he said as he put on some nice clothing.
I grinned more. "Have fun, Mr. Pot."
"What are you talking about?" he said suspiciously.
"Oh, nothing," I said cheerfully. "You might take a cloak; I fear the castle will be covered in pie by the time we come back."
He buried his face in his hands. "What is it this time?" he asked.
"Sweetie is going to avenge me getting pie-ed again," I told him.
He finished putting on the nice shirt that goes over his nice shirt. It was black with lace collar and cuffs. "Gift from Don Diego?" I asked.
"Yes," he said. "Too fancy?"
"Since Twilight ran away in panic instead of explaining, I don't know."
"Uh... okay, now I'm confused," he said.
"It will pass," I told him. "Have fun."
He frowned. "You too."
I was about to go when he said, "I'm going to need to take an apprentice eventually, as part of my quest."
"And you think Scootaloo has the temperment, but not the patience to learn the skills?" I said.
"I... yes," he said. "I'm a little boggled I'm even thinking of it, but she has a passion that I want my apprentice to have. But I don't know how to get her to actually focus on studying the arts long enough to get good at them." He frowned and flopped down on the bed. "I expect that half the reason those three spent so long was they always gave up after a half-assed try."
"See, I kind of admire them for trying so many things," I told him. "I have kind of the same problem as her."
"How did you solve it?" he asked.
"I can't remember," I confessed, embarrassed. "I'm not as good as you at thieving or as Twilight at being a wizard or as Rarity at being fashionable."
"You're good, though. She gives up so fast. Which I guess comes with the territory," he said. "Of being a kid."
"I'll think about it," I told him. "I think, though, what she wants most, is to be Rainbow Dash's apprentice."
"I can't even tell if Dash likes her or not," Ivan said.
"She likes Scootaloo, but doesn't take her seriously," I said. But that's just a guess.
Time to get out of this castle before I end up covered in more pie.
************
Human-Rarity looked exquisite. A long sea green dress with long sleeves and a long skirt with a second dress over it, deep blue with a short skirt, and sleeves, cut low in front to show off the embroidery of the top of the inner dress. With a matching hat and shoes.
Lyra was looking good in a brown suit; she had tanned skin and the same hair as her mane, cut short; her body was slender and boyish; from a distance, you could probably mistake her for a man.
Bon-Bon wore a simple blue dress, knee length with a short-sleeved top, middling in build with long hair much like her mane. Her skin was paler than Lyra's. She looked somewhat uncomfortable and wobbled a bit. Not surprising; I know she is mainly doing this to accomodate Lyra.
"Dear, your bra is upside down, I think," Rarity said kindly. "Hold on, we'll fix this." She dragged Bon-Bon back into Lyra and Bon-Bon's room.
"Did you deliberately dress as a guy?" I asked.
"Oh wait, you're right, this is a guy outfit. Well, it fits," she said, looking a little embarrassed. "It looks good, right?" She studied her hands, opening and closing them.
"Yes," I said. "You look great."
She spun around on her feet. "I have done this before but not much. Back when I was plotting with Twilight. Pity that didn't work out, Prof."
"Best not to call me that, Lyra," I told her. "It's a secret."
She nodded.
She spun around, laughing. "Feels so good."
"So what interests you about this?" I asked her.
"It's hard to say," she said, pausing. "When I was little, Father gave a concert with some humans, who told me these wonderous stories of things I'd never seen, places I'd never been. But I wanted to. Places full of humans. It's strange, I guess," she said, studying her hands. "But to me, humans are strange and magical creatures. They cause wonder in me." She leaped up and gripped the top of the door frame and pulled herself up, smiling. "I guess it's the appeal of the exotic, like you called it in class, way back then." She tried to turn and dropped down.
That's a weird feeling. "I guess I feel... okay, my life isn't that mundane, but you know what it is."
"I like Equestria, but I know it too well," Lyra said. "I want to see all those places you told me about, that Father's friends told me about. I want to see the Northmen raid a town, ride an Alphatian skyship, dig for Nithian ruins, see the Glantrian Parliament meet... but Bon-Bon's very settled down. I hope to get her to do some travelling with me, but I know she can't just roam like I want." She sighed. "I don't know. I love her, but it's going to be hard to make both our dreams work. I just... that song was beautiful but making it real is harder."
I started to wonder if the bra was killing them in there or something. What is taking so long?
"Oh I know. You at least are both ponies," I told her.
She winced. "Yeah." She put a hand on my shoulder. "Oh wow, I can feel things with this!" ...
"You didn't know?"
She carefully touched her suit, feeling the texture, then that of her shirt and then her shoes. "Incredible," she said. "They're so sensitive!"
She ran her fingers through her hair; she was still doing so when the ladies came out. Bon-Bon wobbled again and caught onto Lyra, then stared at her fingers.
Lyra took Bon-Bon's hand and ran it up and down her jacket. "Isn't it cool?"
Bon-Bon's eyes widened. "They're so sensitive."
I took Rarity's hand and kissed it and she shivered, turning a little red. Lyra did the same and Bon-Bon jumped.
I then kissed Rarity on the lips and took her arm again. "Let's go before the Pie Apocalypse breaks out."
"Yes," Bon-Bon said urgently and I wondered if she knew something.
*******************
I paid for a carriage; we got some odd looks from the ponies pulling it; probably the fact that three of the four of us have pony-style hair colors was key. I just paid a touch extra and acted like everything was TOTALLY normal.
Then I remembered... Lyra still has her horn. And it's not invisible like mine.
Well, at least the carriage Ponies care more about money than making fun of us.
We went to a mixed species restaurant, Borderlands, for dinner; I knew Lyra was curious to try a steak, but I didn't know if Bon-Bon or Rarity would want meat.
There was a knot of Belcadizians at one table and Aalbanese at another and some Darokinians at a third. Several others had mixed groups and two had all-pony groups.
I was somewhat surprised to see crocodile on the menu. It was very expensive. Lyra stared. "Humans eat crocodile?"
"We can but it's unusual," I said.
"I HAVE to try it," she said excitedly. "It says it was caught in the Malpheggi!"
"A dreadful place," Rarity said. "Shrimp... those are sea creatures, right?"
"Yes," I told her. I decided to get the pork, rice, and vegetable dish.
Bon-Bon studied the menu, studied us, and looked hesitant.
"I believe there's several vegetable and grain only dishes if you don't want to try any meat," I said to her.
"I won't make you do it," Lyra said to her, studying the menu.
"It's... actually quite good," Rarity said, sounding stunned. "Meat, that is. I can see why humans like it."
"I don't see anything meat-like in this tomato gumbo, I think," Lyra said.
"I could get the larger pork plate and you could try some of it without having to commit to a full meal's worth," I told Bon-Bon.
"Thank you," she said, licking her lips. "I'll try the tomato gumbo and sample yours," she said.
"Man, alligator. One of Father's friends claimed he would wrestle alligators," Lyra said. She sounded amazed.
"Was he missing a hand?" I asked, amused.
Her eyes widened. "How did you know?"
"Well, that makes his stories more likely to be true," I said, amused. Lyra laughed.
Rarity and Bon-Bon looked horrified. "How can you laugh?" Bon-Bon demanded of Lyra.
"Oh, he just laughed about it," Lyra said. "Corwin One-Hand was a good guy. From Darokin. Grew up around Port Tenobar."
Which is one of the ports on the south fringe of the Malpheggi.
We all got some wine; Rarity, Lyra, and Bon-Bon looked confused when they drank it and I blinked. "What is it?" I asked.
"It tastes different," Lyra said. "Better."
"Humans have stronger senses of taste and touch," I told them. "A wine expert can do incredible things like know which winery made a wine just with a sip or two."
"But less smell," Bon-Bon said.
"And since smell and taste have links, it likely changes your experience also," I said. I sipped my own white wine. "Be careful, your alcohol tolerance is likely much less than your pony body. For one thing, you both probably have close to half as much body mass."
Bon-Bon looked down at herself, touched her breasts and then her cheek and around her head. "Really?"
One of the Belcadizians stared at us. Ahahaha. "Yes," I told her.
They brought us some nice wheat bread with butter and honey and jam. We soon were enjoying that.
"Are you from Ponyville originally?" I asked Bon-Bon.
"A native," she said between bites of bread. Nice, WARM bread. Mmm, tasty. "During the summer, I stayed with my kin in Hoofington, though."
"Mother is from Ponyville," Rarity said. "Father's from a military family. They met after a battle near Ponyville with creatures coming out of the Everfree. Mother stayed in Ponyville until I was old enough to take over the boutique; Sweetie went with them until they got sent somewhere not very suitable for kids, so my other sister and I take care of Sweetie."
"Is Grand Stalls that bad for kids?" Lyra asked.
"It's a pretty rough border fort," Rarity said. "Father had been posted to safer places like Fillydelphia before that."
"What does he think of you two?" Lyra asked curiously.
"I sent him a long letter when we came to Canterlot," Rarity said. "I'm sure he and Mother will like Marcus very much." She was clearly trying to force her will on the universe.
The waitress came and took our orders, then we chatted until the food came. It smelled so good. I had just started to dig in when Rarity made a noise. Looking, I saw Bon-Bon was trying to eat straight from the bowl without use of hands or silverware. Lyra whispered urgently to her, "Use your spoon. With your hands."
"Ha..." Bon-Bon looked at her hands, glanced at other diners, then turned red.
I wanted to laugh but I stifled it; I'm sure I screw up pony things. Like my damn tail.
I HAD TO BE SAVED BY A KID!
At least she was an older filly, I thought.
Bon-Bon wiped her face, then fumblingly began to eat with silverware; Rarity showed her what to do. I think she must be studying this, as her manners were quite good.
But then, it would be important to her to do it well.
Lyra was actually more nimble than I would have expected.
"It's all very strange," Bon-Bon said.
"I know. Being a pony is strange to me when I do it," I told her.
"Yeah, I heard Apple Bloom had to teach you what to do," Lyra said, grinning.
I buried my face in my hands. "Yes."
"Now, now, don't mock," Rarity said. "We all have much to learn."
"It's so much easier to walk on two legs like this," Bon-Bon said, then sipped her wine. She sounded amazed.
"It has something to do with how the bones are aligned," Rarity said. "Twilight became very technical when I asked her."
"Humans are meant to walk upright. We can go on all fours, but only clumsily, though it is traditional to play horsey with your kids if you have any," I said.
"Play 'horsey'?" Bon-Bon asked curiously.
"Pretend to be a horse and let your kids ride you," I said. "They generally love it."
"Riding something else seems kind of lazy to me," Bon-Bon said.
"We'll have to see if we can hire someone to let you see what it's like, then," I told her. "It's fun. Though you can get pretty sore if you have to do it all day."
This should be entertaining.
************
Dancing was fun. I love dancing and we showed Lyra and Bon-Bon various dances. We were all pretty relaxed when someone came through the mob and threw a pie at me. Rarity caught it and then GLARED at the blue-uniformed delivery pony who threw it. He ran and we gave chase, but in the short run he was too fast for us.
Dammit.
"We could have caught him if we'd been normal," Bon-Bon grumbled.
"Rarity, did you ever find out what is going on?" I asked.
"Various admirers of Blueblood are getting their revenge, I think," Rarity said.
I sighed. No real way to stop it, which is very annoying.
We went back to dancing.
**************
We found four stallions willing to give us a ride home for a small fee. I helped Bon-Bon and Rarity and Lyra mount. Then helped them not fall off.
It was a nice smooth ride and soon we were enjoying ourselves. One of the Ponies, a black Earth Pony stallion named Midnight Run, said, "I've never seen humans with horns before."
Rarity floated a rock. "There are several kinds of humans too," she said, amused.
"Well, dang," Midnight Run said. "Never met a unicorn human before. Nice to meet you."
"So what's it like, being a pony?" Lyra said, trying not to laugh.
You're a terrible person, Lyra.
Hehe.
Midnight Run began rambling on the rest of the way, while Bon-Bon looked like she clearly would be giving Lyra a talking-to later.
************
As we approached the castle, I could see crews cleaning up a big mess. I knew that was going to happen.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders were busy stacking underwear and pulling it off various bits of the arena where the sun and moon raising ceremonies take place. We all stopped and stared. "What happened?" I asked. I wouldn't even think this castle had all this underwear, given that even noble ponies don't wear much of it.
"Don't ask," Scootaloo said mournfully.
"We got even but then they got even and then EVERYONE got even and I think I had better sleep under the bed where no one can find me," Sweetie said frantically.
Rarity sighed. "Let us help. Tomorrow, we pack, and the day after, we head to Sind."
"Oooh, I bet I can fold those quick," Lyra said, excitedly seizing some of the underwear and folding excitedly.
"I have to practically head butt you to get you to fold the laundry normally," Bon-Bon said, though she joined in. She sounded aggravated.
"Doing it this way, though, is COOL," Lyra said.
I laughed and joined in and we got it all folded; by the time we finished the candy wore off and everyone but me turned back to normal; I was already as normal as I get.
"We want to go to Sind," Scootaloo said to us.
"We can't take you; it's going to be dangerous," I told her.
She frowned and her wings began to flap frantically. "I can fly a gyrocopter!" she said proudly. "I'm a GREAT pilot."
"Keep practicing," I told her. "If that's your talent, you have to work on it. And then you may get your cutie mark. Good luck."
She grimaced. "I don't want to listen to Sweetie worrying about you the whole time."
"I won't be worrying ALL the time," Sweetie said. Clearly there'd already been a fight over this.
"Worrying all the time about what?" A unicorn said. He was white coated with a storm of arrows for a cutie mark, but his hair matched the pink part of Sweetie's hair. Another unicorn, white coated with purple hair like Rarity's, stood next to him; she had a silver bell for a cutie mark.
We all jumped and Sweetie said, "FATHER!" excitedly and ran over to him.
Captain Keen Eyes kneeled down, nuzzling his daughter. "It's nice to see you," he said, oddly sternly, though he smiled.
Rarity looked very nervous, but now her mother came over and nuzzled her. "Hello, dear," she said warmly. "Why don't you introduce me to your..." She paused, saw me, and blinked in surprise.
Sweetie said, "Look, Father, I got my Cutie Mark!"
Captain Keen Eyes started, then frowned just for a moment, but then he smiled. "Congratulations, Sweetie. You have passed a very important landmark in your life. The road to adulthood begins now." He paused. "What exactly does it mean?" he asked curiously.
I bowed to Silver Belle. "Fair lady unicorn, I am Samus Marcus, a unicorn human wizard and a special agent of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna." Rule one of meeting parents, NEVER MENTION THIEVING SKILLS.
Unless they're thieves.
I could conjure a rose, except it would dissolve in a few minutes when the spell wore off. I need to find some way to get a few preserved flowers I could hide on myself for times like this. Oh wait, gardens nearby. I borrowed a rose and presented it to her as I finished bowing. "For the fair lady of the needles." I know she likes to sew.
She lifted it and tucked it behind one ear. "He's as charming as you said, Rarity," she said, smiling.
"Big Brother Marcus helped me get it," Sweetie said excitedly. Her father started. "Watch!"
She drew her deck and sent it flying into the air in a swarm around her father, then it circled her like a line of swimming ducks and then seven cards flew down into a layout, face down. She tapped one and they all flipped over. "You will win your next great battle, Father!," she said proudly, pointing to the Ten of Winds and the Jack of Winds. "This is you," she said, pointing to the Jack. "And ten is the number of victory."
"Well, well, very good," he said, looking relieved.
He probably feared she had a gambling mark. Hah!
"Very good, Sweetie," Rarity said, ruffling her hair and smiling proudly.
Scootaloo looked cranky, Dinky was busy arranging the stacks of underwear into some sort of sigil, Twist studied the cards, and Apple Bloom said, "Hey, maybe you can predict how we'll get our cutie marks!"
Scootaloo IMMEDIATELY perked up. "Ooooh."
"Oh, Father, these are my friends Lyra and Bon-Bon. Lyra is our bard-in-residence in Ponyville and Bon-Bon is one of our gardeners," Rarity said, then moved to stand by me. "And as I mentioned in my letters, Marcus is my special prince." Her voice turned mushy on the main clause and I smiled.
I put a hand on her back, trying not to crinkle her dress. Then I slightly adjusted her hat. It wasn't at a good angle. Then the hand moved back.
He turned now and frowned at me deeply. Rarity frowned a moment, then made herself smile. "How was your trip, Father?"
"Your father decided it was a good idea to see a Traladaran Soothsayer and of course he believed it all," Silver Belle said, gently chiding.
"It only reinforced what I already knew! Humans will try to bed ANYTHING and then they lose interest and move on!" he said angrily. "They wouldn't know monogamy if it bit them!"
That made me angry. "You don't even know me!" I shouted angrily.
"What's a monogamy?" Scootaloo asked.
"It's a creature which only owns one game," Dinky said sagely. "Hmm, no, wait, this rune needs a slash." She began dragging piles again.
"Why would it bite someone?" Scootaloo said dubiously.
"The person took its one game," Dinky said, then summoned a mass of bubbles, hopped on them and began to float upwards over the stacks of underwear.
"Marcus is faithful to me," Rarity said angrily. "Don't judge him before you know him."
Lyra and Bon-Bon quietly retreated to study what Dinky was doing and being ready to hustle the kids.
"Dear, just because a Traladaran fortuneteller said it doesn't make it true," Silver Belle said, trying to calm him.
The Traladarans are the main inhabitants of Karameikos. They have an elaborate system of divining the future through omens and superstitions and tea leaves. I incline to think it's crap, though a few get results.
He took an aggressive step towards me; I shivered in place; I couldn't run, not with my girlfriend here, but he was starting to trigger my powerful 'scream like a bitch and run' instincts.
In fact, I probably would have broken after the second step, except now Sweetie rushed and interposed herself, rearing up. "No," she said firmly. "I'm sure you'll like Big Brother Marcus if you just give him a chance." Her legs were shaking but she didn't run.
Scootaloo made an odd hoof gesture, but I think it means roughly 'hot damn, you're being cool, Sweetie'. I'm only guessing, though.
He paused and Rarity looked worried, but then relaxed.
"You must admit it is odd," Silver Belle said. "People will say strange things." This clearly worried her.
"I know," I told her. "I hid from it myself, but in the end, I couldn't deny how I felt." I'm kind of stunned, really.
"I will be a laughingstock," Captain Keen Eyes said, frowning. "What am I supposed to tell my fellow soldiers?"
"You could try caring more about me than your fellow soldiers," Rarity said angrily.
Bon-Bon began trying to persuade Dinky to clean up the 'rune' and trying to herd the rest of the kids off with Lyra's help but they wanted to watch.
Distantly, I heard Applejack shout about her hat and I heard galloping hooves.
Something happened to her wonderful hat?
SHIT.
"Look at me, I'm a COWGIRL!" Pinkie shouted distantly, voice wobbling. ...
Bon-Bon now began hustling all the kids along, with Lyra's help as best she could. I think she knows doom is coming.
Doom.
Doom.
Doom.
"I do care about you! If I didn't, I'd leave you to this parasite's blandishments!" Captain Keen Eyes said. "Can't you smell his fear? How can you stand someone like that?"
"Marcus would NEVER abandon me," Rarity said angrily, eyes flashing.
Legs shaking, urge to run RISING. But I stood my ground. Can't disappoint Rarity no matter how nervous he makes me. If he knows the 'lancer' spell.... AAAAA.
"Back down, father," Sweetie said, though she looked as scared as me. But also determined. "He hasn't done anything wrong!"
"Honey, we can fight later. The kids should go to bed and I'm tired," Silver Belle said, nudging her husband.
"Did you come all this way to bite my face off?" I said angrily.
"I am commanding the guards going with you," he said, frowning. "Stupid Sind. Full of idiot humans."
"Like the soothsayer," Silver Belle said chidingly.
"She's very reliable," he said. "Her predictions have never steered me wrong." He turned his head and stared at me with one eye.
"Sweetie, would you like to sleep with us tonight?" Silver Belle said to her daughter, smiling at her.
"Only if Father promises to stop saying BAD THINGS." Her voice was very determined.
I could see Pinkie coming our way in Applejack's boots and hat. "Look at me, I'm Applejack!" she shouted, clearly drunk.
"Bring my stuff back!" Applejack shouted. They were coming right at us.
Captain Keen Eyes said, "Oh not AGAIN," then ushered his wife backwards and Rarity and Sweetie and I backed up and the two ran right between us and kept going.
"Hey, it's my favorite stallion!" Pinkie said, turning.
"NOT AGAIN!" Captain Keen Eyes shouted, then fled with Pinkie chasing him and Applejack chasing her.
Rarity smiled, then said, "We must." To my surprise, she cast a spell and grew large enough for me to ride. I mounted up and then we took off after them with Sweetie running alongside us and Rarity's mother chasing us.
This kept us all busy until bedtime.
**************
Sweetie ended up sleeping with her parents. Rarity and I passed out FAST, as we were quite blown.
The next morning, we would dine with Celestia and Luna and be briefed on the mission, then we'd get ready all day, go to bed early and take off the next morning.
I arrived at the breakfast with Rarity, both of us dressed to impress, only to find Captain Keen Eyes there, having a cheerful conversation with Spike about how horrible I am.
Ack.
"He is NOT terrible," Twilight said, though she was frowning. I still have to make things up to her, but she needs some space right now, I think.
"I'm not half as great as you, though," I told her. "Hello, everyone."
Lots of hellos followed along with the ceremonial 'die in a fire' from Spike and Captain Keen Eyes. They were politer than that... in theory. But I knew their meaning.
"Did you and Fluttershy have a good time?" I asked Twilight.
"Wonderful," she said, smiling. "It went well."
"Yeah, we had a good time," Ivan said. "Shouldn't Fluttershy be here by now?"
"She may be sleeping in, though normally she goes to bed early and rises early," Rarity said, rising. "I can go check."
The door opened and Fluttershy walked in. To my suprise, she was in human form, wearing a yellow blouse and a green skirt with her druidic robes, recut for a human, hanging open over them, her hood pulled down. Her golden torc had resized itself to form a belt at her waist. The whole outfit had been cut to allow her large yellow wings to come out of the outfit. She wore a green hat with... a yellow duck on it. Hat, good. Hat with duck... I can't say a hat is BAD, but... she does realize you can NEVER put a duck on your head and have any dignity, right?
Obviously not.
Everyone stared for a moment, then Rarity said, "You look wonderful, darling."
Surely she does not like the DUCK on Fluttershy's HEAD.
SHE HAS A DUCK ON HER HEAD!
It's a stuffed doll duck, but that's only one step away from live duck on head.
DUCK.
Okay, I'm getting far too worked up and she's happy.
Luna and Celestia whispered softly for a few seconds, then Celestia said, "You look wonderful, Fluttershy." Her voice was warm and supportive.
Duck.
I rubbed the side of my head, trying to stop thinking about the duck as it stared at me with cold, lifeless eyes, mocking all my attempts to be serious and sober and calm.
It hated me.
I focused on thinking about our mission and Rarity and how her father is likely to forget to protect me on this mission, leading to my horrible death.
Dammit, I'm nervous.
Twilight looked proud. "How's it going, Fluttershy?"
"It was hard to sleep like this but otherwise well. I don't think I've lost control," Fluttershy said. "But I am not sure how I could tell," she said hesitantly.
You know, I'm not sure how you would tell. Given that when I turn into a pony, there's so many changes... "I've been a human and a pony and you seem to be doing fine," I told her.
Luna telekinesed a box onto the table. "You should wear these circlets; they denote rank and will ensure you are treated better by the Sindhi, who can be rather snobbish about rank."
They were made of gold and silver, one designed for each of us and very valuable. Mine was mostly silver with the five card suit symbols rendered in gold with inset gems. Wow. I had to take my hat off; all of us with hats did, though Rarity's magic hat became a thin veil over her mane now, under the circlet. "Thank you, Princess," she said warmly.
Twilight had something special, a kind of head-medallion which dangled down over her forehead and could be worn with her Element. The medallion showed Luna and Celestia rearing towards each other with her (Twilight) in the 'arch' underneath them.
"I feel vain," she squeaked.
"It's fine, it shows our confidence in you," Celestia said to her and she smiled brightly. "This will either go very smoothly or you may have to fight the infiltrators, if they exist." She slid a report to Twilight. "This is what we know from our agents. Your job is simply to deliver the message and assist the Radhirajah if he asks. If anything attacks you, deal with it and investigate. We need to avoid a war with Sind if possible." Celestia's voice was very serious. "I'm counting on you all."
I wondered why Fluttershy was... oh, right. I expect she wants to ensure they take her seriously. The fact it has to come to that... made me frown.
But you can't change the world, just the bits close to you.
Dammit.
*************
Twilight pulled me aside after the meeting; we stood awkwardly in the hallway, unable to look at each other's face. "Watch over Fluttershy," Twilight asked me. "She isn't used to being human and... well, I'm sure there's problems that I don't even know to anticipate."
"Of course," I told her. "You can count on me."
She grimaced and I sighed. "I swear, no more lies," I told her.
She studied my feet and I studied her headpiece. "I want to be friends but every time I see you I have to tell myself not to set you on fire," she said, frustrated.
Ahahaha. "You have the right," I told her. "Anyway, I owe you service as atonement, whenever you're ready for me to do it."
"Later," she said. "We need to focus on our mission."
I nodded. "Of course."
"Have you ever been to Sind?" she asked, looking up at me.
"A few times, in the past. I only remember it dimly," I told her, trying to remember. "I think we raided some old ruins in the desert when I was a dwarf."
"How much do you remember from being Erik?" she asked softly.
I could lie, claim I hardly remember. She'd likely get less angry.
But I promised no more lies.
Dammit.
I like the easy way out!
"Erik is pretty clear. Anything before that is increasingly blurry," I told her.
"Did you...," she said but couldn't finish her sentence.
"I always enjoyed the time I spent with you," I told her. "And I regretted it ended like that. I liked living here. I just was terrified. You know how I am."
"You didn't seem like that when I knew you as Erik," she told my knees.
"I tend to calm down in safe places," I told her. "I can be pretty mellow when I feel safe and have little stress. Being with you, I felt safe, so I could be calm and happy." I studied her back, not because it was interesting but because I couldn't bear to look at her face.
She made a gloomy noise, then shook her head. "I don't have time to feel sorry for myself. I have to get organized. Make sure you're ready in time, Marcus."
"I will, ambassador Twilight," I told her, then touched my new circlet. I had my hat on also. So it won't get jealous.
"It feels weird to have a high title," she said.
"This is only the start. One day, you will be Princess Twilight," I told her. "And every pony will bow."
"I don't want them to bow to me," she said, pained.
"We both know it's your future," I told her softly. "I know you won't fail on your quest."
She laughed nervously. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."
"I'm nervous too," I told her. "I'm always nervous, but I'm keenly aware of how this could all go to hell. Especially if the shifters are alread taking over."
"We will stand together," she said firmly. "I have made three escape plans and several battle plans. We'll be ready."
I felt better, knowing she'd planned ahead. "Thanks, Twilight. I feel better already."
"Glad to help you," she said. She smiled, then sighed, then shook her head.
"So did you and Fluttershy go out with two of those guys from the club or did you practice being human last night?" I told her.
"Some of both," Twilight said, blushing a little.
"Did it go well?" I asked.
"Yes," she said, then sighed. "Who knows when we'll see either of them again, though."
I was going to ask more but then suddenly I felt a wall of hate. "Hello, Captain Keen Eyes," I said cheerfully.
"Hello, Samus," he said coldly. "Do you normally hit on every pony in sight?"
"He was not hitting on me!" Twilight said.
Thanks, Twilight. You are the best pony.
After Rarity.
"We are on the team together and we were, in fact, consulting about our upcoming mission together," I said firmly, trying not to shake.
Captain Keen Eyes snorted, then said to Twilight, "We should discuss security. In private."
"Okay," Twilight said. "See you later, Marcus," she said without looking at me directly.
"See you later, Twilight," I told her and went to go get ready.
***********
I had the bad feeling I was being played, but I couldn't stop. I'd been giving the job of running herd on the kids for the afternoon, as all my possessions (which were few) were packed and ready to go. So I was busy teaching them about adventuring. They hung on my every word in a way that gave me the distinct feeling I was being played like a violin.
But I couldn't figure out HOW. It couldn't be a distraction with *all* of them here. Unless they cloned themselves.
I pray NOT.
It may have been so they could build up credit with me for when they inevitably begged to go with us. If so, I commend them. It didn't work, but it shows they are thinking about how to use your social skills to do what they want.
I respect that.
But I had to tell them no. This may turn ugly.
************
Conveniently, one of the few rail lines which leaves Equestria runs to Sayr Ulan; it's a huge benefit to trade. So the next morning, we got up and I got turned into a Pony. This would be a longer-term polymorph which made me nervous, though Twilight could dispel it if I needed human form and we brought some candy. Useful stuff.
Sweetie hugged me at the station and said, "I'm going to miss you, Big Brother Marcus."
"I'll miss you too, my dear little neice," I said warmly to her.
Scootaloo glared at me and Apple Bloom looked frustrated. Sorry, guys. But it's TOO DANGEROUS.
My big worry, though, is that the Elements of Power will try a raid to get the kids while we're gone. But it's too dangerous to take them.
We had to practically peel Dash and Soarin' off each other in order to go. She looked kind of worried and he looked sad she was going. She'll be back soon, Soarin', don't worry.
We had a special train car, complete with three lances (squads of ten) of warponies as guards. One lance of lancers (Earth Ponies with a spear mount), one lance of skylancers (Pegasus Ponies with a spear mount), and one lance of archers (Unicorn Ponies with arrows). The archers had been hand-picked by Captain Keen Eyes from his company of a hundred archers; the rest of his unit were back at Grand Stalls.
This seemed a little excessive to me but I have little experience in this sort of thing.
Rarity was very excited; she'd designed an outfit around her new tiara. I'd packed my special hat away for now, as it fit my human head better anyway and wearing my circlet and the hat at the same time looked silly even to me.
One of the things you notice... at least as a Pony, is that Equestria gets drier as you move west. The southern region remains pretty wet and good for agriculture, but having seen points east of here, you can tell that even here it's a little drier. We went southwest to Fillydelphia because it's a huge rail hub. That took about 4 hours, then we stopped for a half hour, things were loaded and unloaded and then we headed to Mareis, going northwest, for three hours. After another half hour loading and unloading, the train took off for four hours, reaching Fort Mont-Mare. By this time we were deep in thick forest; settlement is sparse here in the West Marech, which is often raided by the Elephants of Southeastern Sind. These raids are, theoretically, 'bandits' and 'rogue elephants'.
Sure they are.
The Elephants of Sind have an inflated head because unlike other four legged sentients in Sind, they are treated as part of the Warrior Caste, who form the second highest stratum of Sind society. (The highest caste is the Magical Caste of priests and wizards. In practice, the warriors rule and the Magical Caste try to boss them around with mixed results.) In theory, they owe fealty to the Rajahdom of Jalawar, one of the major sub-kingdoms. In practice, they do whatever they want.
It was night by the time we reached Fort Mont-Mare; a lot of goods were unloaded here and the train camped here for the night for safety. Our special car was practically a hotel on wheels.
Rarity and I were about to go to bed when I heard movement outside the door; someone was listening in. I slid over to Rarity and touched my horn to hers. 'Someone's listening in.'
"Oh, oh, OH YES MARCUS," Rarity shouted.
"..." I stared mindlessly. WHAT?
Her father now burst in and found us just standing there. "You fiendish... what?" He stared at us.
"Father, what we do is none of your business," Rarity said to him angrily. "I am a grown woman."
"He's just a conman," Captain Keen Eyes said angrily.
I tried to restrain my temper. "I am not. I would not do that to her."
"Father, go to bed," Rarity said wearily.
He grimaced. "I'm watching you," he said to me and left.
We got into bed; it was cramped, especially for, well, Ponies. I spent quite a while trying to figure out how to sleep like this without killing Rarity.
Eventually, I slid into dreams of being hunted by Captain Keen Eyes all night.
Delightful.
**************
The next day was a long day. The train pulled out at seven in the morning and we quickly entered the steppes which lie between the Equestrian plateau and the rocky lands south of Sayr Ulan. Here, the plateau cuts off the rains which come off the ocean and the land dries out, so only grass and scrub brush grows here. Sometimes you can see the plateau looming to the east, sometimes not. Buffalo roam here until you reach the rocky desert which surrounds the giant magical oasis of Sayr Ulan.
We spent long hours watching grass go by, reading, playing cards, and slowly going stir crazy and getting more nervous. There were no stopping points here once we passed our single stop, the train junction where a spur ran to Fort Overlook.
Dash was going especially crazy with being cooped up and I took her aside at one point. "You okay?" I asked.
"Bored, bored, BORED," she said. "Also, just... I shouldn't worry."
"About Soarin'? Is he going on a mission?" I asked.
"I never actually thought about how we'll likely spend a lot of time away from each other until now," she confessed, looking longingly out the window. OH.
"I'm sure it'll be fine," I told her. "But it does come with dating a Wonderbolt."
"I'd like to be one, but then I wouldn't be able to be with my friends much either." She frowned. "I don't like that choice."
I wanted to put a comforting hand on her shoulder but I knew Captain Keen Eyes would appear like magic and accuse me of infidelity, dammit. "I know, I know," I told her. "It's..." I stopped. Probably being an Element of Harmony means she'll never be a Wonderbolt; Celestia wouldn't want to split the Elements up and it's likely to keep her from being able to do both. But I can't tell her that.
"What?" she said. "Say it."
She was wearing her necklace. I studied it. "It's more likely to depress you than help," I said.
"Yes, but now I will go *more* crazy wondering," she said.
I laughed nervously. "I expect that Celestia hopes you all will join her as Immortals one day. Being a Wonderbolt is nice but it's not the road to Immortality."
"That's how you became the way you are, right?" she said softly.
"Well, things went badly for me, but I think it will go better with my new patrons." Even if Celestia will probably send me on a gag quest at some point where I will get to the end and discover I moved heaven and earth to find a backscratcher. "I'd like to have my courage back. I was brave, once." It makes me feel so old thinking about it.
"I remember that," she said thoughtfully. "I... fuck it. Let's just... dammit, as a pony, you're so damn big... though I did carry several Wonderbolts at once..."
I laughed nervously. "Without hands, it would be hard for me to hold on, if you're thinking of going flying."
"Oooh, I could get Twilight to shrink you." She gestured. "Come on, we're gonna blow this joint and have a little excitement and work on burning the fear out of you. Even if Captain Tight Ass says we can't go outside. Someone should scout, anyway, right?" She looked at me.
Can't say no.
Going to die if she is going to try to scare me deliberately.
"Right," I said, signing my death warrant.
**************
There's nothing like clinging to the back of a Pegasus flying at HIGH SPEED while you have NO HANDS to make a person freak out.
I think I screamed the first dozen miles; this just made Rainbow Dash fly faster and laugh.
"C'mon, Marcus, you know it's cool," Rainbow Dash said.
It is cool, but the chances of me becoming a smear are HIGH right now. "It's cool but dangerous," I said.
"Yeah, but facing and overcoming danger is how you become braver, so..." She grinned and turned, rushing towards the plateau.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!" Repeated times several hundred.
Faster.
Faster.
FASTER.
We rushed towards the cliff face at VERY high speeds. Below us, Buffalo tried to look up and their fur ruffled in the wind we generated.
And then, as I ran out of screaming, the cliff face closing in, Rainbow Dash turned ninety degrees and flew along the cliff face at very high speed, following its curves and bends and juttings. It's a mile high here, rough and craggy; I could see, part way along the face, a group of earth ponies busy tending the rock face, singing to it, chipping off a few bits, and somehow making the rock grow in other places. They used elaborate rigs to hang in place and a few pegasi and unicorns assisted them.
We arched wide around them to avoid wrecking their work or endangering them and they tried to signal us, so Rainbow Dash looped around. This meant I was now UPSIDE DOWN, trying to cling with my magic and limbs and ready to just drop dead, when we flew up to them. "Hey, guys, I'm Rainbow Dash. How's it hanging? She grinned and I tried to laugh but was too busy trying to avoid ABJECT TERROR. "This is my buddy, Five Jacks High."
Wait, why is she hiding my name? Okay, I am in Pony form but it's not like 'Marcus' is wanted by anyone. "Nice to meet you all." When a friend lies to strangers, you cover them. This is one of my fundamental principles.
One of the Earth Ponies, who was a green stallion with a red mane and a single ruby as his Cutie Mark, said, "I am Ruby Mane. You're one of the Elements of Harmony, right?"
"Yeah, we're on our way to Sind," Rainbow Dash began.
"To go deal with some rampaging undead," I lied.
Dash blinked, then said, "Yeah, I'm gonna kick their ASS." She mimed this, nearly bucking me off; my cries of terror quickly got her to stop. "Sorry, Five Jack High," she said.
"Hey, cool. We sometimes get undead around here. There was a dwarven colony, something went wrong and somehow they all ended up as hungry dead. No matter how many we kill, there always seems to be more and we have to keep sealing off routes to their old colony," Ruby Mane explained.
"Sounds to me like they're only being banished, not killed," I said.
One of the pegasi, cyan with yellow mane, frowned. "How do you get them to stay dead?"
"I'd suggest sending for some clerics," I said.
"I AM a cleric," the pegasi said and only NOW did I notice his sunburst necklace.
Great.
"We only have a druid and they don't do undead," Dash said. "Maybe you have to bury their bodies so they can rest?"
The cleric pegasi looked thoughtful. "Hmm, that could be it. Any chance we could get you to go look around?"
Before Dash could volunteer us, I said, "We're under strict orders," I told him.
"It wouldn't hurt to just LOOK," Rainbow Dash said.
"Captain Keen Eyes will get mad," I told her.
"Good. We'll pop in, take a look, then let you know," Rainbow Dash said.
Oh bloody hell.
************
One advantage of being a unicorn: you always have a light source. When you're descending down an ancient tunnel towards a dwarven colony now teaming with hungry undead because Dash is BORED... you need every advantage you can get, right?
"If we die, I am going to haunt you," I told Dash.
"Hey, you owe me. After this, we'll be even," Dash said.
Hah.
Ahaha.
AHAHAHAHA.
"Laughing nervously won't stop me. You must FACE YOUR FEARS! When I am done with you, Five Jack Guy, you will be the BRAVEST OF ALL PONIES!" Dash cackled as we zoomed down the tunnel.
"Five Jacks High," I told her. If you are going to give me a fake name, you have to use the SAME ONE.
"Yeah, yeah, Five Jacks Sigh. It's what I MEANT," she said dismissively.
Bleargh.
At first, it was rough stone; limestone stalagmites and stalactites stuck down and up from the floor. Everything was slick with moisture that gleamed in the shine of my horn. The air smelled wet and heavy and kind of musty. At times, there were glowing crystals in the ceiling; under them, fungus grew in dark blue and purple patches.
It did not help my nerves that Dash LOVES zig-zagging between stalactites and stalagmites at high speed.
But then I saw a line of red mushrooms, the height of a pony, roughly shaped like the classic 'umbrella' shaped ones. But I know these. "Dash, don't get too close to those," I said.
So she arched upwards, flipped upside down so she could nearly but not quite scrape the ceiling without killing me, then flew over them.
Unfortunately, the ceiling wasn't high enough and the shriekers, mushrooms who respond to vibrations by screaming, began howling, thus alerting the entire UNIVERSE that we were here.
"Dammit, shut up, you stupid mushrooms!" Dash shouted at them.
Shriekers grow in two places: near monsters who eat things and leave behind fleshy bits they use as spore fertilizer or where people plant them to use as sentries.
Either way, TROUBLE.
"Dash, something is going to attack us!"
"Don't be a scaredy-cat, it's just screaming mush...HEY!" Dash was interrupted by tentacles erupting out of a hole in the wall and grabbing us.
I magicked my sword and hacked off two of them and the rest pulled back, then tried to beat us to death; I could see a wall niche inside which a blobby mass of flesh lurked, protecting itself with stone while it extruded tentacles to eat passersby, like us.
Dash dodged the tentacles while I hacked away until it gave up and pulled back deep into the wall.
"Hah! SO THERE!" Dash shouted at it and moved on. "See, Live Jacks High? We can handle it. No fear. We can do it and we WILL!"
Dash's confidence in our abilities both made me smile and made me nervous. The world likes to PUNISH confidence.
"Remember, this is a cave, not a dungeon. It doesn't have to play fair; anything we meet may want to eat us and you can easily get in too deep," I told her. Also, the loot is more likely to SUCK. That thing probably only has dung and a few bones for treasure.
"Right. If it moves, kick its ASS," she said.
Ahahaha.
*************
We dodged two more wall-tentacle-blob monsters. They no doubt have a name but I don't care as long as they don't EAT ME.
Oh look, it's floating brains with beaks and tentacles.
I begin to sense a theme and I HATE IT.
I know these things. Grells. I think they have something to do with mind flayers.
This had better not be the usual 'undead turn out to be slaves of mindflayers in disguise who take you to be eaten' scam. I've seen it WAY too many times.
Once.
That's too many times.
I can still feel the slime.
"Hah, I have a clever idea," Dash said as they came our way, two of them trying to move to flank us. She slowed down and let them come up to where we'd fly right between them.
This plan seems like a plan to get us EATEN to me.
"La, la, I'm an overloaded pegasus and I can't fly very fast so I'll sing a song about how slow I fly, la, la," Dash sang badly.
We crept towards the trap; it was only then I realized... these things have no eyes. They think we can't sense them, so they have no reason to suspect we have a trap.
A trap for OURSELVES, I think.
At the last moment, as they reached for us, Dash ZOOMED forward. The tentacles reached for us and missed, each grell hitting the other and grappling it. They now began to fight each other and Dash laughed as we flew off.
Well done, Dash, well done!
I laughed as we flew. "Very clever! Good job, Rainbow Dash!"
Dash grinned. "I am the best flyer in Equestria!"
Given how fast we may have to run, I suspect we'll find out if this is true.
***************
We now reached a large cavern with several stagnant pools of water. There were glowing crystals in the ceiling and fungus and mold grew on every surface; halfway across there was a long, empty moat and a broken bridge over it; beyond it was a Dwarven city, carved smoothly out of the rough water-flow-shaped stone of the cavern. Skeletal and zombie goats roamed the cavern, feeding on the fungus. Which I now realized was UNDEAD fungus.
Several dwarf ghosts kept running to the bridge, running up onto the broken length, then falling into the chasm; they would then climb back up and do it again.
"That looks fun," Dash said. She peered into the darkness of the chasm. "I wonder what they land on."
"Don't. They're ghosts and we're not. It's why they don't die," I said firmly.
We got closer; there were acid marks at the edge of the broken segments. A black dragon, maybe?
There were spectral dwarves all over the ruins, lost in the madness of the undead. Many were busy etching the same engraving on every surface they could find; when they came close to each other, they fought to see who got to engrave. Slowly they were wearing away the buildings by erasing old engravings and shaving surfaces flat for more engraving.
What a waste. Twilight would cry.
The images involved a mix of elephants, gargoyles, cheese, and some sort of... things that aren't gargoyles but were reminiscent. These other things had glowy energy around their claws and some of them flung evil energy at cheese.
Maybe it's not actually cheese.
There were also a lot of images of dwarves either on fire, being stomped by elephants or being stomped by elephants who were on fire.
We zoomed around over the city, watching freaked out dwarven ghosts repeating themselves endlessly. Ghosts tend to be like that. Zombie and ghost and skeletal goats roamed around, clearly looking for food and not finding any.
As we flew over a plaza, we spotted a lever stuck into the wall of a house for no apparent reason. I could smell it was clearly a TRAP.
Or at least a strange design decision.
"Ooh, I bet that does something cool," Dash said.
"DO NOT PULL THE UNMARKED, UNEXPLAINED LEVER," I said.
"A mystery? Sweet! Lever, here I come!" Dash said.
"No, don't pull the..."
Pull.
Silence.
"Dammit, I wanted it to do something cool!" Dash said.
Alarms began to blare and every undead in the place turned, eyes glowing, towards us. Dash began to rise up, and they rose into the air after us. The wraiths howled and Dash fled deeper into the city as they gave chase. More wraiths rose and soon we were looping and bobbing around a half dozen knots of wraiths, hungry for our life force.
I used my horn and began looking for sources of magic. One of the buildings looked like a craft shop and it radiated power. We should ignore it and get the hell out.
But I bet it has the answer to this place.
DAMMIT.
I should just ignore it. Dash would never know; she can't sense the source of all this.
But I'll know and somehow she'll know I know and didn't tell her. And I owe her.
"Dash, down in that building, there's something evil. Get me in there and keep the wraiths busy."
She nodded, trusting my judgement. Probably not wise, but it's her nature.
We zoomed down and she flew me in, then moved to the doorway and began flying around the street, keeping the wraiths distracted. Her element glowed, enabling her to see.
There was a huge purple gemstone, the size and shape of an elephant's head. Holy SHIT.
I WANTED IT SO MUCH. But I could feel its power. It was what had brought doom to this place; it was full of evil.
Very pretty, shiny evil, carefully, precisely cut. Possibly the biggest gem on the planet.
I could feel more of the dead coming to its call, felt it claw at my soul.
SO PRETTY.
Damn you, greed. I levelled my sword. "It's time to end your reign of terror even if I could sell you for a million gold!"
How on Mystara did Ditzy get such a huge price on her head?
I'm kind of jealous.
FOCUS.
Don't kill me, it whispered. We could have grand adventures together. I am so tired of these tedious dwarves. Join with me and we can destroy your enemies and enjoy all the pleasures that wealth can bring. I will make you rich and powerful and a great wizard.
I twitched. I wish I was a great wizard. Money comes and goes but all powerful magic, that's forever.
I had this sudden weird feeling someone was hitting on Rarity. She would LOVE this gem. So much.
I would make a lovely gift to the woman you love, it whispered.
The one thing worse than being played is KNOWING you are being played, then having to struggle not to let yourself be played.
"Marcus, you alive in there?" Dash shouted. The moans of the dead were getting louder. "Things are getting thick out here!"
I can't dither; the longer I wait, the more danger Dash is in. She's out there, protecting me by drawing away this thing's army.
She just wants me for herself, the gem whispered.
No, she wouldn't. Not Dash's style at all.
I raised my sword. If it hadn't lied about Dash, I might have succumbed.
Dammit and damn my stupid habits.
But I know she'd never betray me. She's the element of Loyalty.
And I will be loyal to her. "DIE!" And then I destroyed the biggest, most valuable gem I've ever seen, crying the whole time as my sword hacked it into shards and I set the shards on fire and energy swirled around me and I was shouting, "DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!"
I think it wanted my Rarity, anyway. Bastard. Probably working for her father.
I smashed it into chunks, then burned the chunks, crying. So much wealth, destroyed.
At least it wasn't a hat or I'd probably be its mindless slave now.
And then the dead poured in through the other doors. This left me only one way out... which wasn't the way Dash was. "The dead are after me! I have to run!" I shouted to her. "Follow the sound of my screaming in fear and we can reunite!"
And then I fled with howling angry ghosts on my heels. I had destroyed THEIR PRETTY. And they would have my soul for it.
Fortunately, I can run like a maniac in this body and their stubby evil legs soon fell behind. Unfortunately, there were MORE of them ahead of me.
And then I heard the sound of angry elephants.
FUCK ME.
Hordes of skeletal, zombie, and FLAMING SKELETAL elephants joined the horde of undead dwarves chasing me through the streets. I could see Rainbow Dash busy bobbing and weaving and dodging and kicking her foes when she could.
I heard the distinctive twang of a dwarven catapult. Once dwarves have shelled you with cannisters of flaming liquid, you never forget that sound.
These dwarves fired a huge hunk of flaming, spectral cheese at me.
The cheese is UNDEAD???
This place smells SO BAD. Running meant experiencing more of those smells faster and it both was hard to breathe and fed my panic. So many hostile, nasty smells, bones crunching under my feet, skulls rolling around... then breathing fire...
I was screaming continuously; I expect even if my horn went out, Dash could just follow my howling to see me.
"I think they LIKE hearing you scream!" Dash shouted distantly, kicking a howling, flaming dwarf ghost in the face and darting upwards, then downwards to dodge ceiling ghost, who popped unexpectedly out of a niche in the ceiling.
I kept running and running as crossbow bolts twanged and pillars tried to fall on me and the dead howled and then I started just throwing fire everywhere, great spirals of flame that set ghosts on fire and buildings and everything was burning but I ran too fast for it to touch me.
One of the ghosts nearly got me but then he howled and ran over to a wall and began chiseling a picture of me on fire being trampled by elephants. ...
I dodged the elephant's kick just in time, but now I got touched by a ghost and it burned and my suit got damaged and I howled.
Then Dash got nailed by one and she howled and I felt a wrenching of guilt in my gut. My side was aching and I kicked one and THAT hurt too. My sword began hacking wildly and I screamed and then...
Then I remembered that huge trench that blocks entrance and how the bridge is broken and how you can only cross if a flying Pony carries you.
FUCK.
Unless I can jump.
The other choice is to stand and fight.
But I can't jump that far, not even as a pony.
DAMMIT.
I flung another one away from me with magic and tried to figure out some way to blind them. They probably are tracking my life force. And maybe my magic.
But I need to SEE.
"Dash, I am running out of room to run!" I shouted.
At this point, a letter appeared, falling on my head. I snagged it and read it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Samus Marcus,
Is everything okay? We can't see you two in the sky and haven't heard anything from you. If you write your reply on the bottom of this letter and burn it, it will return to me.
Rarity is very worried.
Please reply soon,
Your friend,
Twilight Sparkle.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I couldn't focus enough to write a reply, but I saved the letter. Jab. Another burn. OWWW!!!
Dammit, I didn't even get any treasure from this raid!
I was crying and screaming and running. Dash got free and more wraiths descended on her and she howled.
I hurled flame at the ones around her, burning and driving off some of them and she got free. "Dash, going to need a pickup!"
"Run up the bridge and jump!" she shouted as she fought off more of them.
Oh FUCK ME.
But I could trust her and risk falling to my death or I could try to fight these guys.
Trust is a leap in the dark.
Literally.
I put my trust in her and I ran up the bridge, dodging and burning the dead, then leaped upwards. I arched through the air, knowing I would fall short. Indeed, I started to fall and then I heard Dash shout and I was screaming and wind whistled around me and the dead rushed off the bridge after me, raining down like an insane cloud of flaming, flesh-craving death.
Oh hey, there's magma at the bottom of this chasm.
Of course there is.
Well, at least my sword is recharged.
And then, suddenly, Dash.
She grabbed me and flying at blazing speed, trailing light, she rushed up with me, dodging the falling dead, and roaring off down cave tunnel.
Looking back, we could see dwarven ghosts, now on fire and dripping magma, emerging from the chasm. If we just kept running, we'd lead the undead dwarves and elephants to our friends.
"Damn, they just don't give up," Rainbow Dash said.
They were moaning, chanting in dwarf, and then I realized what it was. As I listened, I could remember when I had been a dwarf and slowly meaningless gabble turned into words.
'The ones who slew our master must perish. The ones who destroyed our city must perish.'
Their greed had ensnared them but in time their service to the gem had turned into a deep loyalty and we had impinged upon it by destroying their 'master'. Even though it had forced loyalty upon them, tempted and destroyed them, they couldn't let go.
I told Dash everything and she looked horrified. "How can you be loyal to a ROCK?" she asked. "Okay, maybe Rarity could, but not anyone else."
It would have gotten me if not for you, I thought, embarrassed. "You have to free them," I told her. "You're the element of loyalty. Your element has been corrupted here and you have to purify it."
It was only now that I suddenly wondered... how on Mystara did ELEPHANTS get up to this ruins? It's half a mile up a cliff!!!
On the other hand, the dwarves probably originally had some way down.
WHY DID I GO SOMEWHERE WITH NO TREASURE????
I touched my tiara and felt slightly reassured.
Slightly.
"Me? I'm not a cleric! I don't have holy powers," Rainbow Dash said in a panic. The flying wraiths were coming towards us now.
"You will," I told her softly. "One day, you will shine like the sun and guide the lost like the moon at night. You can feel it, right? Their tense, twisted loyalty to that rock?"
"It's just a stupid gemstone. They're like... as common as DIRT!" Dash said, staring at the onrushing horde as we fled before it, looking back over her shoulder. "Why do they even care?"
"Dwarves love beauty, love the things which grow in the ground, the veins of metal and the arteries of crystal," I said, letting my old self rise up inside me, dim memories stirring of ancient dwarven catchecisms. "It was the most beautiful thing they had ever seen and they shaped it into a form even more beautiful and terrible. It terrified them and it enchanted them, and for it, they would do anything. It destroyed them and they loved it for it, for to do its will was bliss and madness, but even the madness was sweet. They served it and it served them, preserving them for eternity in the beauty of madness, twisted to nightmare, but nightmare is still a dream and the darkness has a beauty of its own. With it, they could create nightmare together forever." My voice was haunted by the end. As I remembered the dwarf I once had been, I could feel their pain.
I could see them for a moment, my past selves, stretching far back, far far back. There are bits of each of them in the me who is me, and I understood how the dwarves of this place sank slowly into madness and darkness, as I had been sinking.
I had let life strip away more and more of me, until only the panicked core remained. Memories gone, capacities gone, strengths lost because they seemed to lead to failure and death. I went on as they went on, a creature of habit and repetition, making the same mistakes over and over.
I ached for them, suddenly, in a burst of empathy. They had gone so far down the road I walked that nothing was left of them but habit and service.
We had stripped them of the opportunity for service. So now they raged against us.
For with it gone, they would sink further, their last shreds of anything but empty habit and repetition gone. But the rage... they could give one last service.
"I can see the chains on them," Rainbow Dash said softly. Her eyes glowed with the light of the rainbow and her element shone brighter. "The veins of darkness twisted through their light. It's terrible," she said, sounding pained.
We kept going and now there were many stalagmites and stalactites; Dash dodged them and kept going but she kept looking back at them.
"You have to do something," I told her.
"Do what? I don't know anything about mystic shit!" she shouted, but her eyes, they ached when she looked at them. She could see what loyalty twisted to slavery had done to them.
Unfortunately, I make a shitty wise old sage or talking animal who tells the hero(ine) what to do. And loyalty is not one of my strongpoints. Running away and saving my skin is my strong point.
But I won't do that here.
Not that I could; my hope of escape is much higher with Dash than without.
But it's the principle of the thing!
Dammit, why did these dwarves put so much CHEESE in their engravings?
"They put cheese in their engravings?" Rainbow Dash said.
"Um, yes. Some sort of gargoyle-like creatures who fired dark energy somehow attacked and destroyed their cheese, I think." They've carved engravings over engravings for so long, it's hard to follow.
"I... dammit, I've heard stories of creatures like that who come from inside the plateau. They probably dug down, freed some of those creatures, and the things destroyed their food supply, then they all went mad and the elephants... how the hell did elephants get in here?" she asked.
"Damned if I know," I told her. "That gem was carved to resemble one, though."
"Hmm... the goats eat fungus, goats give milk, milk somehow gets turned into cheese..."
"You add rennet to it," I told her. "Which comes from cows somehow."
"Isn't there mold or something?" she asked. "And some kind of cloth?"
Dammit, I know cheesecloth exists, yet, I have no idea if it connects to cheese or not. "There is such a thing as cheesecloth."
"Okay, we need cloth, milk, fungus, rennet... what the hell is rennet?"
"I just know it comes from cows."
"Buffalo are gonna have to do," Dash said. "I'm going to have to speed up. HOLD ON TIGHT!"
FUCK.
She BLAZED out of the tunnel and up the cliff face, then up and down along the hills until we came to a tree. "Make this into a bucket," she said. "Two buckets. One for milk and one for rennet."
Ahaha.
Chopping down the tree with my sword wasn't too hard; I hacked it up, hollowed it out quickly and made two buckets. "Now what?"
"Now we find Buffalo," she said.
I don't know if we can bribe them with cheese. On the other hand, we have to do SOMETHING.
Further searching found us some Buffalo; they wanted apples. So then we had to fly across the plains until we found a settlement and I traded some gems for apples. We flew back and traded the buffalo for milk and rennet. Mind you, rennet appears to be buffalo vomit and if they conned us...
Okay, they do get credit but they conned ME which means I will have to con THEM.
Then we went back to the town and got some cheese cloth and then we flew back and I carved a bigger tub out of the remains of the tree. Then we flew back, past the undead, who had nearly reached the mouth of the cave and forced them to follow us back to where the goats and the fungus were. Dash zoomed around and we milked the undead goats...
SOMETHING I AM NEVER DOING AGAIN PERIOD.
And threw some fungus in on general principles of REALLY not knowing AT ALL what we were doing. We mixed everything in the tub, then Dash flew upwards with the cheese cloth, letting liquids drain out. She tied one end around a stalagtite, then we went round and round it like she was making a tornado.
In fact, she made a glowing tornado and I wanted to puke but my body was so shaken up... I couldn't.
Even Dash was starting to look dizzy. But the huge cheesecloth began to glow and as the undead caught back up with us, it shone brightly. With Dash's power. She lowered it and opened it and the most perfect cheese you have ever seen shone forth. It smelled wonderful and I couldn't help but salivate.
But this wasn't for us, it was for them. "Let your hunger be sated!" Dash shouted proudly over the huge wheel of cheese. It was shot through with irregular tunnels in which a fine blue mold grew, like the caverns they dwelt in. But it was TASTY mold. Dwarves like weird stuff that grows underground, anyway.
Dwarven whiskey is great as long as you NEVER ask what it was made from.
Another letter appeared. I now realizd I never answered the old one.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Samus Marcus,
What's wrong? We haven't heard back from you and everyone is worried. Please write back.
Rarity is VERY VERY worried about you.
Your worried friend,
Twilight Sparkle.
PS: As before, you can send a reply by burning this letter.
PPS: Rarity is EXTREMELY WORRIED.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The dead stared at the cheese, then rushed at it, tearing off chunks and eating it. As they ate it, Dash's power entered into them and the darkness in them burned away. Their eyes widened and they relaxed, then faded away (if unsubstantial) or fell over (if embodied.)
"Oh shit, it's killing them!" Dash said in a panic.
"It's freeing them," I told her. "They're undead. They need to become regular dead, so they can move on instead of being trapped in their rut for eternity."
I quickly sent Twilight a note so she wouldn't worry.
When all the dead were gone, a small wheel of cheese remained. Enough to take home and share with everyone on the train.
"Let's go back to the train," I told Dash. "That's enough adventure for one day."
She snagged the wheel. "I bet everyone will LOVE this! Hah, I did awesome magic! ROCK ON!"
************
"How can this possibly taste so good?" Rarity said, stunned after having a slice.
We were in a lounge car, eating the freaky miracle cheese. It was amazingly good given its origins.
"This tastes great," Fluttershy said, eating quickly and enthusiastically.
"It tastes GREAT," Spike said. "Thanks a ton, Dash."
"You're welcome," Dash said, grinning confidently.
Finishing it, I got this sudden, incredible rush that made me jump. "Wow!"
"What?" Dash said.
"I don't know, I got a kind of kick from finishing it," I told her. I don't know how to describe it but it was a good feeling.
"If you want a kick, I'd be happy to oblige, you idiot!" Captain Keen Eyes snapped at me.
We were eating in the lounge car, crammed around a table, and he'd come up behind us. "You two idiots ran off ON YOUR OWN and roused a city of undead! How am I supposed to protect people who leave the safe zone for NO REASON?" he shouted angrily. "Don't pull this shit again, kids!"
"I am not a KID," Dash said angrily. "And no harm came of it!"
"I know you both got injured!" he said.
The fact we were both sporting bandages did not help our case.
"They won't do it again," Twilight said, then LOOKED at us as if to burn this into our brains.
"I can't trust them not to do something stupid!" Captain Keen Eyes said angrily. "I'd have you scrubbing toilets if you were one of my stallions! They're trained not to pull this kind of shit!"
I backed up as he advanced on me. The urge to run was very strong; he's rather intimidating.
"Your stallions spent the time Marcus was gone hitting on Rarity," Pinkie said. "Did you train them in that too?" She frowned.
For a moment Captain Keen Eyes looked shot in the face, but he recovered. "They're all hard-working, disciplined and brave! They'd make fine husbands for my daughter, but that's not important right now! What's important is that you two idiots nearly brought down an undead dwarven army on us and could have gotten yourself killed! When you are SUPPOSED to stay on the train! And don't flap your pie holes about scouting at me! I SENT OUT SCOUTS! I didn't bring ten pegasi so each of you could get in trouble!"
His stupid warponies have been hitting on Rarity.
"You're not the boss of me!" Dash said angrily, wings up and trying to look big. Captain Keen Eyes towered over her anyway.
"Father, did you entirely pick your men by who you think I ought to marry?" Rarity said angrily.
I could feel myself getting angry. We'd helped a bunch of poor undead finally escape their misery. And his stupid men had been using this as an excuse to HIT ON MY GIRLFRIEND!
"I picked good men who know their place and do their jobs and fight hard and bravely! Anything else is merely a coincidence!" he protested, though he took a moment to GLARE at Pinkie, who now was trying to eat the rest of her cheese and making distorted faces. "And none of my men have put this mission in DANGER!"
Applejack frowned. "Well, he's right, you two shouldna done that. But it ain't worth throwing a hissyfit over, either."
"I am in charge of this train and protecting you and if any of you pull this sort of childish behavior, the pegasi WILL stop you," he said. "It is my duty to protect you and I will do my duty even if you wouldn't know duty if it bit you," Captain Keen Eyes said angrily to Dash and I.
I was pawing the ground and snorting. Not deliberately, it just seemed the way to express how pissed off I was. I could hardly think I was so angry with this bastard.
"Hey, I helped stop Nightmare Moon! I helped stop a dragon from devasting Equestria! SEVERAL TIMES!" Dash said angrily. "I do my duty! I do things YOU CAN NEVER DO," she shouted back.
"MEATY! That's it!" Spike suddenly said. "It tastes totally MEATY. Yumm!"
"You're right," Fluttershy said. "It is meaty." She licked her lips. "We should stop shouting and discuss this like adults."
"You think you can take ME, boy? I could kick three of you's ass," Captain Keen Eyes said flatly.
I could smell how much he despises me and it made me even angrier. Fluttershy and Twilight were worried, Dash was pissed off, Pinkie smelled amused but was busy eating everyone's unfinished cheese, and Rarity smelled VERY worried and angry at once.
"Marcus, let it go," Rarity said to me. She turned to her father and spoke firmly. "Father, stop spitting on my coltfriend. I am quite vexed with you! And tell your men to stop trying to flirt with me. I have a coltfriend." Though she sounded flattered by it, which aggravated me more.
"Your coltfriend is trash," Captain Keen Eyes said. "A lily-livered maggot who doesn't have the GUTS to make me shut up."
I haven't been this angry in forever. My nostrils flared and my eyes were wide and my blood was pounding and I wanted to rush him so much. But kicking Rarity's father's ass is unlikely to go over well with her, much as he deserves it. So I pawed the ground and breathed hard and fought the urge to attack.
"That is ENOUGH," Twilight said. "Captain Keen Eyes, one more word from you trying to provoke Marcus into attacking you and I will send Celestia a letter and ask her to have you removed from this mission." Her voice was very firm and I could smell her anger.
His mouth widened. I could smell his shock.
"Marcus, he's right and you two shouldn't have done that," Twilight said firmly to us. "You both got hurt. What if you were left unable to go on? You could have died and we wouldn't have even known WHY."
"But..." Dash began.
"Go to your rooms and stay there until you calm down. And don't go running off again when we're supposed to stick to our guards," Twilight said determinedly.
"But..."
"Come on, Dashie," Fluttershy said firmly, hustling her along. Dash protested, but Fluttershy simply overwhelmed her, firmly herding her along with her hands. I stared in shock.
That's not normal.
"Marcus, you go too. I am going to talk to the Captain in private," Twilight said firmly.
I bowed to her. "Yes, Duchess Sparkle." I emphasized Duchess, reminding Keen Eyes she outranked him.
Rarity came with me, grumbling under her breath. I paced in our room, unable to sit still as she flopped down on the bed, launching into a long list of her past troubles with her father.
I half-listened and half tried to calm down but I couldn't calm down. I wanted to wipe that smug look off his face. Bastard!
I hate that bastard so much.
I hadn't hated anything this much in a long time.
Dash... okay, Dash and I shouldn't have gone in there on our own but they needed our help! And we helped even the undead! Dash was awesome but now we're in trouble.
"And then I rode the giant cheese off into the sunset," Rarity said, frowning.
"That's nice," I said, not really listening. Until now it sank in. What?
"Pay attention when I'm whining!" she said angrily.
"I've been sent to my room like a five year old!" I said angrily. "I can hardly think!"
"Which is probably why you ran off without even telling me!" she said angrily. "You got HURT! I was worried about you, you know! You wouldn't even write me back and let me know what happened." She pointed a leg at me accusingly.
That hurt and I cringed. "I'm sorry, dear, we did it all the time on the trip and I totally didn't think about it, then I got the first letter when we were in deep trouble and I couldn't answer." I hung my head in frustration.
"Pay attention when I'm pontificating," she said strongly, but she patted the bed next to her. I came and laid down, feeling my whole body still doing the nervous energy thing. "I want to run," I mumbled. "Not away, just run. To MOVE."
Ponies find it harder to hug than people, but we embraced clumsily. I could smell her frustration and mine and we laid there together for a while.
I suddenly wondered if the duck on Fluttershy's hat had somehow made her stronger willed.
What if it's controlling her mind? Soon, there will be nothing left but a quack with a human face.
Dammit.
***************
Rainbow Dash's 20% Cooler Viewpoint:
I flopped down on the bed. "You might as well tie my wings down, so Captain Tight Ass doesn't freak out."
Fluttershy sat down on the edge, then clasped one of my hooves between her hands. It feels so weird. Her wings flapped excitedly. "It sounds to me like you did a really kind thing, going so far for those poor ghosts."
I smiled weakly. "Thanks, Fluttershy," I told her, stretching out. "I think... I don't even know how I did it, but there was this thing."
"Thing?" she said curiously, pulling back her hood and letting her long pink hair spill down. She turned to face me, trying to find a way to sit comfortably on the bed.
"It was like... The totally coolest thing ever. Like the first time I did a Sonic Rainboom, the first time we all joined together and stopped Nightmare Moon. It's like... I touched something bigger. Something powerful." I don't even know how to describe it. "Something holy," I said softly. "You know that feeling, right?" I think druids are holy.
"I know exactly how you felt," Fluttershy said. Her voice is weird like this; it has all the cadences, but it's deeper. Not man-deep, but closer to, say, Rarity. Or Sapphire Shores. And when she gets excited those stupidly large breasts humans have start shaking. I don't see the point, though the way Marcus looks at Rarity's chest when she's human, I guess they're for hypnotizing men.
I hope Soarin's not... he wouldn't forget me just like that. I shouldn't worry but all the women wink at him and shake their flanks and...
I really have a small butt. But he says he likes that.
Don't think about Soarin', or I'll just go crazy. I am totally sexy and he will NOT think of anyone else, period.
I'm sure he's probably just thinking about pie and not other women.
Stupid pie.
"I remember the first time I changed shape. I totally lost myself in being a deer, but that moment, where I felt my body start to shiver and then I could feel Mother Nature's power flowing into me, like I could feel every living thing. Like I *was* every living thing," she said excitedly. She leaned forward; that was unusual. Fluttershy never leans towards people she's speaking to unless it's some small cute creature, where she's clearly the boss.
"That's how I got my silver torc, when I showed I could shapeshift. Though it quickly became apparent I couldn't control it," she said, then sighed and sank back on her haunches. "But I think I'm doing okay. I remember I'm Fluttershy, I'm a pony, a druid..."
"Well, humans are sentient," I told her. "It's not like turning into a ferret or something where they don't even have names."
"They have names," Fluttershy said urgently. "I name them all."
But do they actually USE those names? They can't even speak in a lot of cases.
"Anyway, I feel very proud of you," Fluttershy said warmly.
"I could see their loyalty to the stupid elephant-head gem thing," I told her thoughtfully. "Can you see kindness?"
"I can see it in you," she said, smiling.
I turned a little red. "I can be kind of mean sometimes."
"I'm a little jealous I wasn't there. I would have liked to help them too," she confessed. "But what you did was very kind."
I could feel her loyalties. To Angel Bunny, to us, to her Order, to Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, to her parents... I felt like something's changed in me. It's kind of exciting but scary too.
Is this how unicorns feel with magic? I should talk to Twilight.
As if I had summoned her, she now knocked and we let her come in.
"Hi, Twilight," I said. "Welcome to Cell Fifty-Eight. Prisoner Dash reporting." I saluted her.
She sighed. "Dash, you really shouldn't have rushed off without even asking the rest of us. Captain Keen Eyes was very rude but he did have a point. I'm sure he was very worried about you."
"Frankly, I think he's just worried about who Rarity is sleeping with. Speaking of which, I think Rarity and Mar... Five Jack Smile totally did it. Yesterday, that is."
Twilight and Fluttershy turned beet red. Twilight said, "I don't know and I never WANT to know."
Oh wait, her ex... damn me. "I'm sorry, I totally forgot about you and him."
"Also, what did you call him?"
Wait, dammit... oh yeah. "See, there's no point in him being a pony if we call him 'Marcus'. That wouldn't even fool Sweetie," I said, sitting up. Well, it wouldn't fool Sweetie forever, anyway. I rolled around to get in a comfortable position. Fluttershy was oddly scrunched up, trying to find something to do with her legs.
"So I named him..." Wait... what was it...
"Five Jacks High?" Fluttershy said.
"Yeah, that's it," I said.
Twilight blinked. "Hmm, not bad. Good thinking, Dash."
"Of course. I am a genius," I said modestly.
"But running off like that was NOT wise," Twilight said. "Please don't do it again; it took me forever to talk Captain Keen Eyes down."
"Hey, we got to help some people and I was TOTALLY BORED," I told her.
"We have to be careful! The Sindhi have very different customs and we have a huge duty," Twilight said, because she is overly serious about everything.
Blah blah, sindhi customs, blah, ambassador, blah. You know how it is.
"Dash, pay attention," Fluttershy said, shaking my shoulder gently.
I blinked and stared at her. Had she actually... I probably hallucinated that too in my boredom. "Sorry, Fluttershy, I was remembering how I made magical CHEESE. Cheese so good it saved the soul of dwarves! YEAH!"
"I want to ask you about that in a minute," Twilight said. "But I need you to understand, we have to be careful and please, please don't antagonize Captain Keen Eyes any more."
"He's a rude asshole with an inflated head," I said, frowning. "He's probably going to try and steal my boyfriend too."
Half the Won... no, focus, trust Soarin', do not worry!
"He's trying to steal Ma... Five Jacks High for himself? But he's married!" Fluttershy said, worried.
I blinked in confusion. What?
"She didn't mean that," Twilight said. "Please, Dash, promise me you won't cause any more trouble. It's really important this go well so we don't have a war. Please, I'm asking you as a friend."
How can I say no to that? Saying yes to her felt right. The same way it feels right when I pull off a fancy move. "Okay, I promise, no more wandering off, no matter how bored I get."
She relaxed. "Thanks, Dash. So tell me about how you made the cheese."
She got Spike to come and take notes; only now did I realize, she hadn't brought Spike in before. Probably so as to make it more private. Thanks, Twilight.
I told her about the whole adventure. She looked quite intrigued by my cheese-making. "Amazing," she said, studying my Element.
"I can feel it," I told her softly. "Like... Tell me what it's like when you feel magic."
"Oooh, that's hard to express in words." Twilight swayed gently back and forth, thinking. "It's kind of like with smell. I can smell magic, where it's been used, where it's being used. Well... it has more... like smell plus sight. So I can see it far away too. Whereas, you know with smells, you have to get close or have a favorable wind."
I nodded. "I can see how loyal you both are." It was comforting. "How you're trying to take care of us," I said softly.
"Let me try something," she said, reaching a hoof over to touch my element and then hers began to glow and I felt a spell reach into me and...
I could feel it. Magic, everywhere. In the train, in Fluttershy, in Twilight, in me. There was a powerful knot of magic at the core of each of us. Fluttershy's whole body was flush with it, due to her shapeshift.
Twilight's eyes widened. "Amazing," she said. "Congratulations," she said softly. "That's really special."
I grinned. "Yeah. Well, I am very special," I said; it wasn't pride, just honesty.
She let go and the spell faded. "I have to go see Rarity and Ma... Five Jacks High. Wish me luck," she said.
"Wait, we have to... oh wait, never mind." Can't gossip about Rarity and Five Man Band with Twilight. "Good luck."
"I'm sure it will be just fine," Fluttershy said.
Listening to the death should entertain me.
*************
BACK TO MARCUS-O-VISION:
Rarity and I were half-asleep when there was a knock on the door. "Come in," I mumbled.
Twilight strode in; I could see Spike lurking in the hallway. She closed the door. "We need to talk about... EEE!"
"No, we're just snoozing," I said and tried to sit up. This is much harder in this pony body. Rarity and I flailed about, then somehow got around to sit sphinx-style, which is way more comfortable than you'd think at a casual glance.
Rarity carefully adjusted her tiara. "How are you, darling?" she said groggily.
"I talked down your father," Twilight said. "He still hates Five Jacks High with all the hate in the world, but there won't be any more of his men hitting on you." She sighed.
"Good," I said firmly.
"Of course, it would help if you didn't stupidly run off on your own with Dash and get yourself and her hurt!" Twilight said angrily.
I grimaced. "I didn't realize it would get so ugly," I said defensively. Yeah, we came close to getting totally screwed and I now had fresh scars to prove it.
Rarity frowned. "I am going to have to lecture Dash on not putting you in danger."
"Don't bite her head off. I'm a big boy, I made my own mistakes." I sighed. "We decided together."
Rarity frowned and Twilight said, "Well, you need to decide to NOT do it again. Because we have to be very careful. I would have thought you of all people would understand that." She sounded disappointed.
I try to be bold once and it gets me in trouble. This is why I'm not bold. "I'll be more careful," I told her. "But I couldn't let Dash go alone."
"You should have come and told us," Twilight said firmly.
"I was *very* worried," Rarity said to me, idly playing with my mane.
"I'm sorry," I told her, now feeling guilty.
"And you got hurt," Twilight said, sounding guilty herself. "Were you trying to prove to Rarity's father you could be brave?"
"I'm tired of being so afraid," I told the mattress.
"You are not a coward," Rarity said fiercely. "When it matters, you are a lion. A LION. Do not let anyone else tell you otherwise." She kissed my cheek. "Father is going to be an ass, but he'll come around. He just hasn't gotten to see you at your best."
I nuzzled Rarity and relaxed a little. "Is he always like this with your boyfriends?"
"I've never had a coltfriend he could stand," Rarity said, sighing. "But he'll come around. This time."
'This Time'. ACK.
"If Five Jacks High doesn't get himself KILLED," Twilight said firmly.
"I won't do it again," I told her mournfully.
"Wanting to be braver is good. But one can be too brave too," Twilight said.
"I remembered some more about one of my past lives, when I was a dwarf," I told her. "I was able to call up knowledge from him when I needed it most."
"Oooh, tell me about that," Twilight said excitedly, so I told her everything. Rarity began working on repairing my damaged suit, though she listened.
I told her the whole thing as well as I could remember.
"You'll need to learn to tap that knowledge, I think, as part of your path," Twilight said to me. "I think you'd gotten pretty close to finishing before it all went to hell."
"Yes," I said. "Once this whole business with Marjorie is done, I am going to talk to Celestia and Luna about it. But I think they hope that all of you will walk those roads together."
I hope I'm not saying too much. But they should know.
Rarity looked surprised but also intrigued. "All of the Elements?"
"Being guided to an artifact by an Immortal is often part of the start of a path. We'll be a powerful bloc," I said. "Most immortals start out alone with no allies or just a friend or two." But given some of Celestia's big plans... we'll need them.
Twilight looked lost in thought.
"Twilight, dear, are you okay?" Rarity asked.
"Wondering what it will be like," Twilight said softly.
"We'll spend our days jacking Halav's chariot, no doubt," I said and they all laughed. "I'm ready to have a purpose again," I said firmly. "I've let the world shave me down almost to nothing, but I want to push back. To be free of the chains I've wrapped myself with. It's weird... being angry at Captain Keen Eyes... I normally never let myself care that much, but that was a mistake. I want to care even if it scares me." IT SCARES ME.
But I had no fear, and that... was wonderful.
"I never... okay, I did want to be special," Twilight said, talking to the bed instead of to us. "But this goes beyond that."
"I know," I told her. "But there are very few pony immortals; your nation needs you. Celestia needs you."
"I will do my best," she said with determination.
"Of course you will," Rarity said. "I put my trust in you."
"Thanks," Twilight said, embarrassed. "Anyway, Five Jacks High, I need you to try to avoid angering Captain Keen Eyes or running off on your own or with Dash or anyone else. We have to stick together and be careful so this mission succeeds. I know you don't like him; you haven't seen him at his best, though. And he is trying to do his job. So please be patient."
"I will try," I told her. But he really gets my goat.
"Okay, you two can... finish snuggling...," she squeaked out. "I'll go plan my speech."
"I'd be happy to go over it with you," I told her. "Persuading people is one of my talents. And Rarity could likely punch up the elegance of it."
"I would be happy to help you of course," Rarity said to Twilight.
"Thanks," she said. "I'll see you later!"
She fled and we went back to snuggling and dozing.
************
We were into the desert by dinner time. There's a strip of rocky desert between the grasslands and the great magical oasis of Sayr Ulan. The border and the climate zone shift are the same thing and you can FEEL it. While we had pegasi on the train, it moves too fast for them to engage in effective weather control and pretty quickly, the train heated up; we had sweat with our dinner.
The coming of night was a relief, and moreso when we entered Sayr Ulan's massive magical oasis, another climate controlled area. The last twenty miles or so ran through lush grass and rich farms, orchards, and gardens. Exotic animals grazed and roamed about; Fluttershy waved at them all.
The city itself is large and powerful, home to thirty thousand people. It would likely be much larger if so much of Sind wasn't wasteland. A thousand springs created by clerics and maintained by high-caste Sindhi and Ponies keeps this whole region green and fertile and the city is full of water to a degree many outsiders (and the Ylari) envy.
The train station sticks out like a sore thumb, made of wood in a city of stone, brick, and adobe. We arrived at night and were greeted by a small party led by a grey-coated, black maned stallion in exquisite clothing with a FOUR TIERED HAT. I was struck dumb with utter jealousy, especially when three tiny clockwork ponies could be seen circling the three lower tiers.
"I am Baron Golden Star," he said; his cutie-mark was a golden six pointed star. "We of the embassy here are quite pleased to be graced with your presence, lords and ladies in the service of Celestia. Let it be henceforth known that we shall endeavour in all things to further your delicate diplomatic mission and to maintain the secrecy urged upon us by Celestia. You can be sure of the discretion of my staff and your safety under our protection." A stack of papers floated next to his head, for he was a unicorn. An Earth Pony mare stood next to him in a somewhat less magnificent suit and a simple black conical hat with a narrow brim. She had two boxes in a mount on her back; as Baron Golden Star read his speech, each page floated into the empty box closer to her flanks.
"Thank you," Twilight began.
"And Luna," Ivan said. "You need to mention her too." His voice was firm.
The mare twitched, while Baron Golden Star showed no sign of noticing Ivan existed, let alone responding to him.
"On such a solemn occasion as the arrival of special envoys of Princess Celestia to bear an important, secret message which can be revealed to no one but the Radirajah himself, it is, of course, customary to offer a few remarks," Baron Golden Star continued. "Let us begin by remembering the many blessings which have been rained down upon us every day by Princess Celestia, who raises the sun and the moon each day and ensures they bless our fair land of Equestria, a realm so great that even those of other species flock to our flag." He nodded briefly at Fluttershy and Ivan.
"Princess Luna is in charge of the moon, you know," Ivan said, now clearly more aggravated.
The mare twitched again. Another page was disposed of and Baron Golden Star turned to the next.
Captain Keen Eyes flashed a series of short and bright pulses of light from his horn; his men began to fan out, the Pegasi spreading out over the station, the Earth Ponies forming a loose perimeter and the Unicorns clustering near us. Dash started to rise and Captain Keen Eyes grunted at her and she grimaced and landed.
"Hail Celestia Invictus, who blesses our land with the sun and the moon and the stars, by whose power, night and day are divided and the seasons turn regularly. Hail Celestia Invictus, who defeated the Feathered Serpent of Shadow and drove him into the depths beneath the world and imprisoned him. Hail Celestia Invictus, who drove the servants of Karaash from this land. Hail Celestia Invictus who defeated the Mare of the Moon. Hail..."
This went on and on while Ivan grew more and more irritated. Applejack looked bored out of her mind. Rarity took some measurements on Fluttershy and began modifying some dress patterns she had. Dash rocked on her feet like a metronome, looking ready to die. Twilight stood as if frozen JUST before she intended to speak. At times, she started to try to override the Baron.
Nothing could stop this man from talking.
He had two Earth Pony lancers, two Unicorn magi, and two Pegasi guards, all of whom looked as bored as us and lurked where he could not see this. His assistant looked apologetic.
Around page seven, Twilight said quickly, "Can we finish this at the embassy? We've come a long ways and this place is harder to secure."
"Fear not, Sayr Ulan is a city which is very safe! The Radirajah's guards protect it ably and unlike some human cities, there are no sewer monsters nor shambling undead hiding in closets or other places which might reasonably conceal shambling undead," Baron Golden Star said cheerfully. "Fear not, you will have plenty of time to sleep before delivering your secret message, by which I mean a message whose very existence must be concealed from the world at large. It is best we wait for the streets to finish cooling, as this station has a nice breeze."
Captain Keen Eyes flashed another signal to his men.
"Now, as I was saying... oh yes. Hail to the Elements of Harmony, whose mighty deeds are so mighty that they are also a secret, which cannot be revealed and shall not be revealed in this speech. Nonetheless, it is entirely meet and just that they might be chosen as special envoys for a message which is so secret that even it existing as a secret is itself information not to be generally revealed," he continued. "Next page," he said, discarding that one and calling up the next.
I let his hat hypnotize me, watching the little clockworks circle it while Rarity made her happy work noises and the cool night breezes began to blow. Pinkie was staring at Baron Golden Star as if he was beating her to death with a hammer and she made small whimpering noises in face of the onslaught. Twilight had a frozen smile and clearly was doing calculations of some spell in her head to avoid madness.
Hat... blah, blah, secret.... blah, blah, Hat, hospitality of the Radhirajah, caste, blah, priests, blah blah, Hat...
I only came out of it when I found myself in a room at the embassy. Rarity was asleep on the bed and I found myself next to it, just standing there, for no reason. So I changed into a night robe and went to bed, hoping this was NOT like the time I got mind controlled by mind flayers and ended up their slave for three months.
I soon fell asleep.
**************
Breakfast was a mix of fruit and these incredibly tasty stuffed rolls. They were were full of cauliflower, chillies, and coriander with ginger and red chili powder mixed in. They set your mouth on fire but they were really good.
"The speech did end, right?" I said.
"I don't know, I passed out from boredom," Rainbow Dash said. "Man, that guy just TALKS AND TALKS."
"It is the job of an ambassador," Baron Golden Star said behind her and she jumped. If he was offended, he showed no sign of it as he joined us. "I hope the food is to your taste."
"It's great," I said. "Kind of hot, but great."
Rarity carefully peeled an orange and seperated it into segments, giving me half. "Thank you for this meal," she said graciously.
"I merely do my duty," he said humbly, then began eating himself, lifting the food with his magic.
Twilight made the 'manners' gesture at everyone and everyone began fumbling around trying to be elegant, though Ivan and Fluttershy simply ate with their hands, causing Baron Golden Star to stare.
"What?" Ivan said irritably.
"You would be well advised to know that the inhabitants of this country regard eating with your hands as a sign of being low caste." He nodded at the knife and fork and spoon by the plate. "Even something like this."
Ivan showed Fluttershy how to do it, though he looked more irritable now. "You left Princess Luna out of your speech."
"Diplomacy is Princess Celestia's concern," Baron Golden Star said smoothly between bites. "She is also best not mentioned while you are here."
Ivan narrowed his eyes. "Why?"
"Some self-proclaimed prophet of Luna has been making the rounds urging the Ponies here to revolt and subject the humans to their will," he said. "Saying Ponies are a higher form of life than humans and ought to be at the top of the caste ladder. There's always some sort of lunatic like this, but this one has some of the humans rather agitated, and they'll be watching you closely."
"Frankly, this screwed up caste system deserves someone to toss a match and let it burn," Ivan said, frowning.
"M'lord Ivan, you are, of course, free to say what you like, but you might wish to consider the expression of such sentiments is likely to be conducive to the failure of your mission, though I can, of course, only speculate," Baron Golden Star said, turning his head to study Ivan with a single eye. "I take it you are a devotee of the Princess."
"You could say that," Ivan said, then carefully ate another of the cauliflower rolls.
"They went dancing together! She's a really good dancer!" Pinkie said excitedly.
Baron Golden Star's nostrils flared a moment and he ate quietly.
"We do have to be careful," Twilight said. "Have the arrangements been made to see the Radhirajah?"
"In one week," he said.
"One WEEK?" Dash squeaked out.
We are going to go crazy cooped up in here.
"It is not easy to secure a private audience with the Radhirajah when one cannot explain the nature or purpose of the message to be delivered," Baron Golden Star said regretfully, then poured himself more orange juice.
I can't tell if he's being obstructionist or it's just his nature. I think he's annoyed he doesn't know the message.
Twilight frowned at her food, continuing to eat.
"I could have gone back to my farm for a while if I'd known about this," Applejack grumbled. "I hate leaving Big Mac to do all the work at the farm."
"Spike, darling, can I ask you to send a few letters for me?" Rarity said to him. "I need to get information from some clients so I can work on their projects while I am here."
"I'd love to!" he said, pausing from wolfing down food. "Hey, where do dragons fit into this system, anyway?"
"Generally the warrior caste," Baron Golden Star said unusually succinctly. "You'd have to have a few more magical skills to be treated as part of the magical caste. Duchess Twilight, on the other hand, would, in theory, be part of that, but she is a Pony, and thus of the lowest caste. Being foreigners, however, you all will be treated as higher than a tradesman but lower than a warrior. Except for the humans. Count Ivan will be viewed as a warrior if he dresses appropriately and Countess Fluttershy as a member of the magical caste."
"Oh, I should take a cover name too," Fluttershy said.
"Filippa. It means 'lover of horses'," Ivan said. "We could pretend to be siblings."
"Oh, that's very kind of you," Fluttershy said, smiling. "Filippa it is! Do you have a family name?" she asked.
Ivan paused a moment. "I am Ivan, son of Gorya, making me Ivan Goryaov. You would be Filippa Goryaova."
She smiled and took his hand for a moment and squeezed it. "I always wanted a brother," she said, looking very happy.
The pink hair is a bit of a give away, though. On the other hand, druids do weird things to their appearance all the time.
A week.
I looked at Dash; she looked trapped like a rat in a cage.
Oh yeah, this is going to be a pain.
***********
We couldn't wait for a week. But the need to avoid trouble mostly confined us. But only mostly.
Ivan and Fluttershy slipped out together that night to gather intelligence, her to talk to animals and him to poke around with his mad sneaking skills. Which I could have joined him but I'm not very sneaky in this body, dammit.
Dammit, if that duck betrays them, I will be very angry.
Instead, I teamed up with Spike and Twilight to work on scrying for our evil twins. Unfortunately, something (MARJORIE or the duck) was protecting them, dammit. So we worked on magics for detecting shifters.
Somehow, I woke up in bed after... Did I fall asleep on Twilight's floor? That's nostalgic.
"Next time, come to bed," Rarity told me.
"It was just like old times," I mumbled.
She cuddled up to me. "We are going to get very lazy like this," she said regretfully.
"A little vacation doesn't hurt," I told her. "If we don't find something for Dash to do, she's going to DIE."
"Is everything good?" Lt. Far Sight asked. He's a pegasus stallion, the second in command, and he is after my Rarity.
FAT CHANCE, Far Sight!
"We're fine, Lieutenant," Rarity said. "Just like fifteen minutes ago."
"The one time I didn't ask would be the time someone's hurt or on fire," he said. "Carry on." He headed off.
"While I do have my work, I am going to go crazy," Rarity said. "Father was never this bad with my past boyfriends."
"You should see if there is a spa we could go to. We could probably do with extra grooming before the ceremony, anyway. Surely we can't get in trouble at the spa, right?" I said.
"That is a wonderful idea, darling," she said enthusiastically. "Let's go find out."
*************
"You won't find one which services Ponies. There are places to get a trim and so on but they're very pedestrian," Baron Golden Star said. "I'm sorry."
Dammit, I thought.
Checking in with Ivan and Fluttershy was, at least, more interesting. "There's several prophets," Fluttershy said. "It's hard to be sure with animals, but she's been seen around the city by several animals at the same time. They always describe her as black with blue mane, wearing a moon amulet."
Twilight frowned. "Could be illusions or shapeshifting. Or maybe teleporting since the animals can't give precise times."
"It's probably the Elements of Power stirring trouble. Or the shapeshifters," Applejack said, frowning.
"Or both," Spike pointed out.
We'd all rendezvoused in Twilight and Spike's room to discuss what we knew.
"We know Clarity eventually... helps to lead an army against Equestria," I said, frowning.
Rarity looked quite angry. "It's not going to come to that. I can't even imagine how any version of me could betray Equestria like that."
"Someone probably waved enough gold under her nose," Spike said, then sighed and grumbled about Spikey.
"You're a better man than him," Fluttershy said firmly to Spike, patting his hand.
"Thanks, Fluttershy," he said, smiling.
"Call me Filippa while I am in human form," Fluttershy told her.
"Filippa," he said, then looked thoughtful. "We need some treasure. We can probably bait her with it if she's out there."
"Ooh," I said. "Good thinking, Spike. We all have some treasure left from the adventure, right?" I said.
"I sent mine to the farm with Big Mac and just kept enough for personal expenses," Applejack said.
"I put mine in my account for when I have to commission a platinum torc," Fluttershy said. "And I bought a lot of socks for some mice friends who are having cold feet at night."
Where do you buy socks for mice?
"I put mine in my savings account, of course," Twilight said.
"I ate my share, except for the ones I put in my vault at Twilight's tower to eat later," Spike said.
"I put the coins in my savings account but I have my gems," Rarity said.
"Mine's mostly hidden in my house at home," Dash said.
"I spent most of mine on more potion and some other little tricks," Ivan said.
"And..." Pinkie began, but Ivan put a hand over her mouth and they started wrestling around. "Mine's in the bank too except for the big sack of astral sugar I had shipped home from Canterlot for later!"
'Astral' Sugar? Now I'm intrigued. "I have all of mine except what I spent on clothing or Rarity," I said. "I guess Rarity and I will have to put up the bait loot," I continued reluctantly. My precious treasure. But ideally it won't be lost.
"I have a perfect idea!" Pinkie said. "Hold on, I have to take Ivan down first, though."
"I'll help!" Dash said, jumping into the melee.
"No, I can't let you doubleteam my brother!" Fluttershy shouted and...
Jumped in.
We all stared, unable to believe what we were seeing.
"Oh no!" Fluttershy said as what she'd done sank in, but soon she was laughing as Rainbow Dash tickled her and they rolled around on the ground.
"Stop before something breaks!" Twilight said urgently.
They all sat up, laughing, and Rainbow Dash said, "Thanks, Fluttershy."
"Filippa," she said.
"Philip," Rainbow Dash said. "I mean Flipper. Filippa!" She rubbed her head. "Wow, you actually tackled me. But then you gave up."
"I should have asked if it was okay, first," Fluttershy said, embarrassed.
"It was fine," Rainbow Dash said. She relaxed. "I needed that."
"Are you all okay?" one of Keen Eyes' stallions said.
"We're fine!" Twilight said. "No one was wrestling at all!"
Silence.
"Okay, Duchess Sparkle," the stallion said hesitantly.
"We're fine," Fluttershy said. "Don't worry, we're okay."
"Yes, ma'am," he said. I could hear faint noises, probably a salute, and then he left.
"I could find us some more gems with my magic," Rarity said.
"But all the gems inside this city are likely already claimed," Applejack said. "I guess we could head out and dig some out of the plateau, then come back. Beats sittin' around here for a week."
"I have an idea," Pinkie said. "It'll take us several days but with Twilight's super magic, we can MAKE some fake gems. It takes a lot longer to make real ones but these just have to look shiny long enough to distract her. Applejack, we get to FARM TOGETHER!"
Applejack's head came around excitedly. "Really?"
"I will teach you all the ANCIENT ART OF ROCK FARMING!" Pinkie said. She paused, then said, "Wow, I'm actually wanting to do this. I always hated rock farming."
I laughed. "Because this time you feel a purpose to it, right?"
"Yeah," Pinkie said, still stunned. "Hmm, I wonder if I could get one of my sisters to come help. Or even Father. He would be so proud."
"We can bill it to the Crown for our mission," Twilight said. "Setting a trap for Clarity is an appropriate use of our expense account. We could announce that 'rare jewels' will be on display, tempt her to steal it."
This is where I expected the CMC to pop up and offer to build a trap but they were still in Canterlot... or better at resisting exposing themselves.
Man, they could be watching us ALL THE TIME and with those cloaks we might never know.
That duck...
Okay, TOO PARANOID now.
I can see it has its beady left eye on me all the time, though.
Relax. "So how do we grow gems?"
"Spike, get ready to take a letter. It's time to summon Pinkie's father," Twilight said.
************
We spent the rest of the day and into the next getting things ready. The embassy had a garden, which we were going to have to destroy, quickgrow rocks in it, then restore to normal.
I hope we have time for it.
Pinkie was bouncing around, directing everyone. It was good to actually DO something, hard as the work was. Rarity and I both watched our gems get planted as seeds and felt rather... nervous.
Pinkie had somehow gotten a hat like Applejack's; Applejack was... so happy. I mean, she's not normally grim or anything but as we shovelled and dug and moved plants and took care of them in the pots we put them in, she was... in her element. Seeing her and Pinkie do this had... you had a feeling the world approved of it. I don't know how to describe it.
Singing work songs made the work easier; I don't understand that, but though I was exhausted by the end of our first day, it was a good kind of exhausted. Rarity was utterly filthy and so was I. We all took a very long bath; Captain Keen Eyes' men had to drag half of us (including me) out of the hot soaking tub afterwards. I fell asleep in it.
Then Rarity, Twilight, and I got to play power pump on the second day; by the time Pinkie's father arrived in the evening (he'd left his home southeast of East Point the day before.), we were all utterly exhausted. I prayed he'd say 'eyup, you're good' and not 'you all totally blew it, blow up this farm and start over'.
I'm also hoping we actually have time to LAY A TRAP before the meeting.
It didn't help that Captain Keen Eyes would watch me work and make grunty noises of disapproval. Bite me!
However, he also had several of the earth ponies help us and that was a big help.
Pinkie's father, who turned out to be named Clyde Pie, was a stern looking dark coated and maned pony with... a HAT. Seeing that made me know he could not be all bad, whatever might happen. His saddlebags were so full that tools actually stuck out of them.
He studied my hat for a moment and nodded approvingly. I was quite pleased. "Pleasure to meet you all," he said sternly, studying us. "And thank you for inviting me to assist you in this mission for the Queen. I'm glad to do my duty to Equestria." He bowed, pony-style, then turned to Pinkie. "Good to see you are well," he said sternly.
Pinkie pounced on him and hugged him. "Hi, Daddy!"
"Hello, daughter," he said weakly, looking a little embarassed.
Blinky Pie was slightly younger than Pinkie, greyish-purple coated with a long gray mane pulled into a pony-tail and a dark blue kerchief. Her mane in front had much the same style as Twilight, right down to a pink stripe in the same place as Twilight's streak. She also wore a bright pink scarf with grey rocks on it; I bet Pinkie gave her that. "Nice to meet you all," she said seriously. "Hello, sister."
Pinkie pounced on her now, hugging her tightly. "This is going to be wonderful. We only have a few days to make enough gems to draw in Rarity's evil twin sister!"
"We can't make very good gems at all in so short a time. They take a long time to mature," Clyde said. "It's why we focus on granite, limestone, and iron ore. Though we should get our decennial gem harvest from the northeast forty in about two years. Just in time for Mother's sixtieth, like I planned."
"We have a plan to hyperstimulate growth, but we needed to consult an expert rock farmer, sir," Twilight said seriously. "I'm Twilight Sparkle."
"Duchess Twilight Sparkle," Pinkie said.
Twilight turned a little red.
"And I'm her faithful companion Spike. I'm a baby Amethyst dragon," Spike said.
Clyde raised an eyebrow. "Don't you eat gems?"
"Yes, but I promise not to eat them until AFTER we trap the evil twin," Spike said; his drooling did not help his case.
Clyde looked worried, then studied all of us. "Well, we have quite the herd to work with. So tell me about your theory," he said to Twilight.
As we headed back to the embassy, Twilight rambled on while Clyde listened or made a grunt for emphasis. Then he began barraging her with technical questions about heat and soil conditions and the weather and acidity of the local water and a lot of things which went WAY over my head.
Rarity and Pinkie, in fact, had to help Twilight, who clearly was outgunned in this area. Which I suppose makes sense. Applejack also pitched in.
Blinky didn't talk much, just looked at things and listened. Her cutie mark was a drum. Curiously, I asked, "So what does your cutie mark mean?"
"I can feel out the ground by playing my drum; it tells me many things about the soil from how the ground shakes and my beats echo. I can break things too if I have to," Blinky said, then studied mine. "What does yours mean, Five Jacks High?''
"I am a jack-of-all-trades," I told her. "I do many things modestly well, instead of the normal being very focused on one thing. And I am a wizard."
She studied my legs and I looked down at them. "Is something wrong?"
"You look unusually strong for a unicorn," she said.
"Well, I'm not a soldier but the soldier unicorns are certainly strong," I told her.
"They all glare at you," she observed.
I laughed nervously.
"It's going to require a large amount of fire in order to get the proper shine on the rubies," Rarity said up ahead, continuing her conversation.
"FIRE," Spike said urgently, then breathed it.
"It will take a lot more fire than that," Clyde said.
"I can augment his fire," Twilight said, then launched into a long technical discussion of it.
"I'm not on the best of terms with Captain Keen Eyes, because I am seeing his daughter, Rarity."
"You... oh," she said. "He's not pleased by how well you 'know' his daughter," she said, smiling a little.
Dammit, this is probably some Kagyarite joke I don't know. "Yes," I said, hoping she wouldn't now condemn me as a heretic or something.
"Fathers are never happy when their daughters 'know' a stallion too well," she said amiably.
AHH.
Ahahaha.
"So this is to catch a copy of your fillyfriend?" she said.
"Yes," I told her. "Named 'Clarity'. She's very hard-working but also rather greedy and addicted to gems."
"Is there a copy of Pinkie?" she said softly, studying her sister, who was rattling on about crystal structure formation and bouncing around her stolid father as he ambled along.
"Named Pinkamena," I said. "She's a very skilled manipulator of people and her imaginary friends are real. And kind of grim and lonely."
Pinkie rose up between us somehow. She put a hoof over each of us, walking along on two legs. "She is our sister, Blinky, and I am going to save her and her friends." She was very serious to a degree unusual for her. "It's going to be long and hard but I don't care. So how are you, Blinky?"
"I am fine," Blinky said. "I have become a very good drummer and I continue to study hard so I can inherit the farm. And I've been going trotting with Rising Horizon."
"What, the colt with the glasses and the buck teeth and the big nose?" Pinkie said in surprise.
"His nose is quite pleasing, I like his glasses and he had his teeth corrected after you ran away from home," Blinky said irritably. "And he's a stallion now. We're not kids any more. Are you trotting with someone?"
I wondered idly if that was a colloquiallism of their area or a general one I hadn't heard.
"Well, I did kiss one of the unicorns to see what it's like, but he's afraid the Captain will kill him if we do it again," Pinkie said.
"You just kissed some soldier to see what it was like?" Blinky said, horrified.
"What?" Clyde said. His gaze fixed on Pinkie.
Pinkie jumped into the middle of our group and spun on her hindlegs, forelegs extended.
o/~ I kissed a boy and I liked it,
o/~ The taste of his minty cologne
o/~ I kissed a boy just to try it
o/~ I hope my friends don't mind it.
The length of hay that Clyde had been chewing fell out of his mouth.
"Why would we care?" Rainbow Dash asked, confused. You and me both.
o/~ It felt oblong, it tasted right
o/~ Don't mean I'm in love tonight!
o/~ I kissed a boy
o/~ And I liked it, I liked it!
Clyde stopped moving and stared, mouth open wide.
Blinky stopped moving, crouched down and hid her face, mumbling about having to move to the moon.
"Oblong? What on earth did you kiss?" Ivan said, confused.
"Pinkie doesn't know what oblong means," Blinky said through her hooves, still crouched. "She just likes the sound of it. It's a rectangle which isn't a square, by the way."
I thought a rectangle was not a square by definition.
"Obbbbblloooong," Pinkie said. "It's GREAT."
"Pinkie, you can't just go kissing random soldiers!" Clyde protested. "What will people think? People will TALK."
"Ponies all talk, you know," Rainbow Dash said to him slowly and confused. "Whether or not Pinkie kisses a soldier. Was he good, Pinkie?"
"Pretty good," she said. "His name has been concealed to protect the innocent, though."
Except there's only ten possible targets and if Captain Keen Eyes hears of this... there will be death.
Clyde looked at the soldiers escorting us, who ALL tried to pretend none of this had ever happened. Captain Keen Eyes was back at the embassy, thankfully. Clyde then looked at Dash. "I am, in fact, a talking pony, in case my hat confused you."
"She probably was confused by its high quality and the fineness of the felt," I said. "And the stitching."
"It is nicely assembled," Rarity said, smiling.
"Rarity made my hat for me," I said. "For which I am quite grateful."
"Is it one of them?" Clyde said, looking at the soldiers.
"We're not deaf, you know," one of the earth pony lancers said irritably.
"Your mother is going to fret about this forever, Pinkie," Clyde said mournfully.
"It's no big deal," I told him. "Whoever it was, he and Pinkie had a little fun, no one got hurt or pregnant, so what does it matter?"
Twilight mumbled, but then said, "Five Jacks High is right. As long as he wasn't slacking on duty or anything, it doesn't matter."
Pinkie sang about sweet boy kisses under a summer night of stars.
"Amen to that," Applejack said sagely. "T'aint nothing wrong with kissing a boy or three," she said to Clyde.
Clyde mumbled about the wild, high life of Ponyville and Manehattan.
"C'mon, silly sister," Pinkie said, nudging Blinky. "It's time to go. I know you kissed a boy too."
"It's different with him," Blinky mumbled and finally rose back up.
Clyde shook his head. "Being a parent is never easy." He sighed, then turned to Twilight. "Was we discussing rubies?"
"Rubies," Rarity said musically. "One of the most beautiful of gems."
"I fancy opals m'self," Clyde said.
"Opals do have their place, but they don't glitter and shine enough," Rarity said.
"A man can't have shine in his face when he's workin'," Clyde said.
"Amen to that," Applejack said.
We ambled on as they discussed the beauty of gems and I enjoyed a break from the work before, no doubt, yet more work.
*************
We worked until dinner, then into the night. Earth ponies can be kind of relentless and we had to redo a lot of work; it's clear Pinkie hasn't done this in a while. Her father seemed pleased by her effort, though.
"See what you've got here? The beryl's angled wrong, so if it keeps growing, it's going to spike right through the topaz and disrupt it entirely," he pointed out as I lit up the hole they were peering down.
Blinky was busy banging on her drum; the ground vibrated constantly and she would announce things, leading us to drill more holes down to make changes. Or dig them.
Rainbow Dash liked the drill as she could tie herself to it, then fly in a circle at high speed and operate it. I could see several of the pegasi soldiers watching her work. Too bad, boys, she's taken.
Good luck competing with a Wonderbolt.
Pinkie suddenly turned to her father. "Where's Inkie?"
He sighed. "Decided she's an elf," he said mournfully.
"An elf?" I asked.
"Blah, blah, I was born to frolic and play in the forest and sing and dance and not move rocks around, my true elven soul revolts at these chains, blah blah, blah." Clyde sighed. "She dyed her coat green, renamed herself Arwen Moonshadow, then hopped the train to Darokin City to go to Alfheim and 'join her people'. I expect they'll ship her back in a few months with a note asking us to not let her do it again." He looked at Pinkie and they both looked rather uncomfortable, then he sighed. "What's done is done. The Cakes write us every week to let us know how you're doing since you usually forget."
Pinkie cringed. "I never know what to say. Parties never sound so cool on paper as they are in reality." She sounded guilty.
"You could, at least, *try* to convey it," he said. "What's next, Blinky?"
"I expect Pinkie will cry to try to make you feel guilty," Blinky said, frowning.
"I mean with the rock work," Clyde said patiently.
Pinkie made a gurgly noise, trying not to cry.
"There is something suspiciously like rock candy intermixed with the emeralds," Blinky said. "I can't imagine why."
"It's so delicious," Spike mumbled.
"Show me where to drill!" Dash said excitedly and soon dirt was flying everywhere.
"You shouldn't rag on your sister so much," Applejack said to Blinky.
"I work hard and no one cares I exist, she goofs off and gluts herself and is a great heroine of Equestria," Blinky said irritably, continuing to bang her drums and at times, kick a cymbal. She kicked one drum and banged the other with a stick held in her tail.
Applejack opened her mouth, then shut it for a few seconds. Then she said, "Farming isn't something you do for glory and recognition. But without us, people would die. You gotta have food. I'm proudest of my farm, but no one cares about that." She watched Dash work. "You're gonna get the farm eventually, right?"
"Yes. And I'll need to find someone to marry. I hope things work out with Rising Horizon, but he's not the first stallion I've gone trotting with," Blinky said.
I listened curiously while I carefully churned a patch of soil with a kind of rake thing. I'm not sure why I am doing this but Clyde and Blinky seem to know what they're doing, so I kept it up, moving the rake with my magic, though I was getting worn out.
Blinky switched beats and cocked her head. "There's a snake at point 28, 23, depth twenty feet."
"Twenty feet?" Clyde said. "How the hay is a snake digging that deep? WHY?"
"It's slowly heading towards 28, 22," she said. This is some sort of coordinate system they understand intuitively and I just follow orders to follow it.
Fluttershy, who had been directing the embassy pets in digging said, "Show me where."
Blinky blinked, then pointed. Fluttershy ambled over and began to sing. The snake soon rose out of the dirt, then coiled itself around her gently; it was a huge constricter with golden and black scales; she caressed its head and spoke to it with sibilant whispers.
Blinky stared, eyes wide.
"Don't tell me you've never seen a druid," Applejack said, surprised.
"I thought she was some sort of trainer. There aren't many druids in the Big Apple Province," Blinky said. "Don't those things normally crush people? Or do they like humans?"
Fluttershy now caressed the serpent with her wings and it made happy noises. I had a very odd feeling and tried to figure out why.
Ivan made odd noises and went to help Twilight with... something big and magical that I couldn't tell what it was but it stuck down in the ground a lot. I'm not sure how he could help but it was suddenly urgent.
"Sssississis says he was sent to spy on us by my sister," Fluttershy said, stroking the serpent gently. "But he got lost tunneling his way in. He's got a little spell or three on him. But he's going to stay with me now."
"Is she the prophet?" I asked.
"He's never seen her look like the Prophet or preach about Luna," Fluttershy said.
"He's probably a plant," I told her.
Fluttershy blinked. "Five Jacks High, he's an animal."
"Yeah, Five Jacks High, he's a snake. They're not plants, you know," Pinkie said a little chidingly.
"Yeah, plants don't move under their own power," Dash said, shaking her head. "Ergo, not a plant."
Twilight made a noise. "Homonyms, it's a homonym, everyone."
"How do you even tell what gender a snake is, anyway?" Dash asked.
"..." What?
"He certainly..." Ivan trailed off into an odd noise.
"I mean, he meant 'plant' as in 'spy'," Twilight said a little lecturingly.
"Why not just say spy?" Dash asked.
Damn you, Thyatian and your homonyms. Thyatian is the most commonly spoken language in this region. When Darokin adopted it as their official language, it gave it a further boost. Thyatians like to absorb foreign words and integrate them into Thyatian. The result is that it is full of words which sound the same but mean different things, homonyms.
"Because... I don't know," I said irritably. "It was just the first word that came to mind."
I could smell everyone get worried. I am not going to totally freak out. Just aggravated.
Fluttershy looked embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Five Jacks High," she said apologetically. "I should have realized that."
I relaxed a little. "It's okay," I told her. I could feel everyone relax... smell them relaxing... as I relaxed. I can see how stampedes get started.
Pinkie suddenly said, "I guess Mom is home tending the farm?"
"Someone's got to ensure the rocks gather no moss," Clyde said. "I expect Five... what is your name again?"
"Five Jacks High," I told him.
He studied me with one eye. "Five Jacks High is right, I reckon. Likely he's the spy meant to be caught so we don't notice the REAL spy." He looked up at the air. "Blinky, any chance..."
"Not unless it's really big," she said. "My talent doesn't go that way."
"Two of my unicorns are experts in ECM," Captain Keen Eyes said.
I jumped, having not noticed him coming.
"They'll find any invisible or phasing spies," Captain Keen Eyes continued.
"ECM?" Dash asked, confused.
"Espionage Counter-Measures," Captain Keen Eyes said. "I knew something like this would happen, if not the details. We put anti-scrying wards over the embassy; the ones it had weren't very good. But they won't stop a physical, well hidden spy."
"It's not impossible someone on the staff has been charmed or possessed or just bribed," Twilight said, frowning.
"None of the staff are watching us, though," I said. "Right now, anyway."
"Well, we should get back to work, let the experts handle it," Clyde said, then looked at Twilight. "But you're the boss, ma'am."
"Captain, would you like me to help your men?" Twilight said to him.
"I'm sure they'd be glad to have your assistance," Captain Keen Eyes said.
Twilight went off with him and the rest of us went to work.
***************
If there was another spy, we didn't catch him, but Fluttershy adopted the snake as her pet, naming him Slither. There's something just odd about someone walking around with a constrictor on them which is being cuddly instead of murderous.
I slept like a rock and the next morning, we all had breakfast and went to work. Twilight, Rarity and I were fairly zonked by lunchtime from the amount of magic we had to pour in; some of the military unicorns helped. Clyde was amazed by the results; Applejack looked like she felt it was cheating. Necessary cheating but cheating.
At lunch, we were joined by the ambassador, Baron Golden Star. "How is the project coming?" he asked us.
"Well," Twilight said. "We should be able to lay our trap and clean it all up before we see the Radhirajah."
"That's good," he said. "We're going to have to... do something to reinforce the embassy vault. There's been a robbery at the Thyatian Embassy."
Fluttershy's duck was watching me, but I ignored him. Stupid duck. I blinked. "Really?"
"Someone tunneled up under the embassy and lowered the vault down into their tunnel and them made off with everything in it," Baron Golden Star said. "I have of course assured them that no one involved with our embassy would do such a thing," he said, gaze sweeping across us meaningfully.
"After all the work we did yesterday, I don't think any of us could steal another biscuit," Dash said.
"I wouldn't go robbin' an embassy, tired or not," Applejack said, frowning at Baron Golden Star.
"Of course not, Countess," he said smoothly. "I merely informed you of my course of action. Hopefully, there will be no more incidents."
"Any clue who did it?" I asked. "It could be Clarity. Or one of the other Elements of Power."
"The only clue is four beads of rhodolite strung on a string," Baron Golden Star said. "And a silver Minrothad coin but I expect it was just planted to throw suspicion on them."
I snorted. HAH!
He looked at me, and I said, "Long story, sir."
"I don't think it was the Elements," Ivan said.
"Why?" Twilight said curiously.
"They'd frame us," Ivan said. "They likely know we're here," he continued. "And they might well frame us even if they didn't know. Someone would get enough of a look at Clarity or whoever that they'd recognize us if we showed up, so as to wreck our mission."
"Whatever exactly it is," Baron Golden Star said. "Beyond tearing up my garden."
"It's a secret," Twilight said apologetically.
"I'm surprised they haven't tried to frame us yet if they do know we're here," Applejack said, frowning. She poked at her rice with a spoon gripped clumsily between hooves. It was not easy to eat that way, but manners dictated it and Applejack struck me as someone too stubborn not to keep trying once she'd committed to something.
I bit down on a pepper. So tasty even if now my mouth will burn forever.
"It's a good question," Twilight said. "I suppose the Thyatians are unlikely to let us take a look around."
"I only know about the clues because I have connections," Baron Golden Star said.
"I will go poke around a bit," Ivan said. "I can do more good than with the rock farming."
"I'll come with you, brother," Fluttershy said. "Slither can help us."
I wish I knew if she is good at keeping a cover or has basically lost it.
"I'll candy up and come too," Dash said. "Much as I like the drill I NEED TO GET OUT OF THIS PLACE!" She paused. "Nothing personal, Baron Golden Star, but I am a Pegasus."
"Do we have anything for you to wear?" I asked.
"I DID bring formal clothing. The candy will convert that, right?"
"Yes," I said.
"We're good, then."
"I can't let you all roam around without any protection," Captain Keen Eyes said, frowning.
He had AGAIN slipped up on us. Or at least ME.
"Three is the most. We can't sneak with an army. Trust me, we'll be fine," Ivan said to him. "And if we aren't, I'll apologize later."
"If you get in trouble, I will be in trouble, whether you apologize or not," Captain Keen Eyes said. "I have to send SOMEONE with you."
"They're going to need to fake being human," Ivan said. "Got anyone who can handle that?"
"Me!" Pinkie said. "But I have to help farm."
"One of my Earth ponies, so he won't stand out," Captain Keen Eyes said. "You'll need to hide Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash's wings unless you want to stand out, though."
"I can fold them in close and put clothing over them, right?" Dash said.
"You really want to go, I see," Applejack said, amused.
"Even just walking around will be nice," Dash said.
"I'll find a suitable man to go with you," Captain Keen Eyes said.
Ivan frowned but nodded. "I'll come with you. Dash, get suited up."
The rest of us finished lunch and got back to work.
***************
Humanified Dash looked, in fact, like a Thyatian who fell into a pile of buckets of paint. She had olive skin and her usual short rainbow colored hair, with a golden laurel wreath and a rainbow-colored stola with golden sandals. Her stola was pinned with a golden storm and lightning bolt on her left shoulder. She was short and athletic of build.
She twirled nimbly on one foot. "How do I look?"
"You look great," I told her.
"You look like you could be Marcus' sister," Pinkie said.
"Hmm, that's true," Rarity said thoughtfully.
Dash did a little dance, swinging her arms around. "Not bad at all. So when does the soldier show up?"
"I'm right here," he said; like Dash, he looked Thyatian. Unlike Dash, he looked like an explosion in a clothing factory had caught him by surprise; his shirt was, in fact, on backwards. "I'm Private High Dive," he said, saluting. "My specialty is high altitude operations but I'm also a skilled scout."
"Darling, your outfit is a disaster," Rarity said. "Let me get you fixed up."
She dragged him away. Dash watched them go, then glanced at me.
I glanced back. What?
She blinked, then grabbed Ivan by the hands. "Come on, let's dance while we wait."
They were soon spinning around with a nimble grace I know I can't match in this form. I can handle moving around, thanks to the magic, but I can't do THAT.
Then again, she is an athlete.
I hope this mission goes smoothly.
**************
Ivan-O-Vision:
I hope High Dive knows his stuff. Him coming out with the shirt on backwards... let's hope it was a joke.
Really, this would be better with just Fluttershy and I, since she can shift and I can do it with my potion if I need to.
I hope Dash doesn't get impatient and screw this up for us.
"Dash, cartwheeling down the street isn't very sneaky," I told her.
"Sorry, I just need to move around," she said. "And call me Samus Julia! It's my cover name!"
"We need a cover name?" High Dive asked, then combed his unruly black hair again.
"You are now Antonius Pius, cousin of Samus Julia," Ivan said.
"Right," he said very seriously. Unlike Dash, who is rather a ham and rather... it's like she's always just drunk a pot of coffee. He was very sober and serious, which I guess is how Captain Keen Eyes likes it. He began looking around as we walked; he was dressed much like me, but without any weapons.
"So what's the plan?" Dash asked.
I have an idea but it's rather risky.
"Well, this will probably blow up in our face, but I am thinking we can drop by, you two can fake being Thyatian long enough to make inquiries about what's cool and what isn't in this town, if there is anywhere Thyatians should avoid and the like. Fillipa and I will be your Karameikan companions and while you two ask questions, Slither can spy and I can sneak around a bit."
"So we're the diversion," High Dive said carefully.
"Yes," I said. "Basically, your job is just to blather." I licked my lips nervously. While I see if what Luna taught me works without Luna around.
Having succeeded in part of my quest for Immortality, I've gained a new trick she taught me, which she learned from Asterius long ago. It worked in the fight, but...
Be confident.
I wish she was here, though. I'd feel more confident. At least I know they can all fight if everything goes to hell but let's pray it does not.
I fingered my ring; I spent some of my money on it; it's a silver ring with Asterius' holy symbol on it. Which is the moon.
I can do this. If I am going to be an immortal one day, I'll never get there by being worried. Trust my allies. Dash fights very well, but is too rash. Fluttershy is a great druid but not very assertive. High Dive is a trained soldier. Even if he can't use his biggest talent right now.
No freaking out, I told myself.
I feel in over my head sometimes.
A lot.
But I have to do this. Karameikos needs someone who will actually care about it. Asterius has told me to help Celestia and Luna for the moment, so I'm doing that. And I want to do it well. I tend to let others take the lead on things, so I'm not used to being in command.
But I have to get used to it, if I'm going to become an Immortal.
They're all looking at me. Hopefully, I am not showing panic.
Lead!
I led them off down the street; the embassies are all in the same district, along with businesses which cater to foreigners, like a very nice looking Karameikan style restaurant. In fact, Karameikos has an embassy here, next to the Thyatian.
"Okay, the first part of our cover," I told them, "is that we'll go into the Karmeikan embassy, do our 'wandering tourist' routine, but no spying. It'll just let us practice using our fake names."
"What's your fake name?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I don't need one, I'm not in disguise."
She shook her head. "You are now Petrov."
"Okay, I'm Petrov," I said, hoping I remember it.
The Karameikan embassy was small and simple. Sind has some trade with Karameikos but I suspect the consulate in Jahore, the main port, is much larger and more important. The reception desk had a single bored clerk who was busy writing a report. Short and dark haired, he studied us, then his eyes widened.
Hopefully, he thinks we are generic adventurers and is not an agent of some foe or thinks I am Erik or something.
Erik's one of my two oldest friends but sometimes I just want to beat him to death for being an idiot. He gets us in so much trouble, it is hard to believe. Honestly, the only reason he's still alive is the reincarnation thing. I'm stunned I've survived being around him so much.
"Hello, welcome, travellers," the clerk said nervously. "I am Vassily. A pleasure to meet you."
"A blessing on you and all your kin," I said, bowing. Fluttershy bowed as well; Rainbow Dash and High Dive bowed a few seconds later. "I am Petrov and this is my sister Fillipa. We are from Specularum; these are our friends Samus Julia and Antonius Pius from Kerendas in Thyatis." Kerandas is a major horse breeding region. I had a horse from there for a while until a chimera ate him.
"Nice to meet you, fellow human," Rainbow Dash said.
Dash, no human ever would say 'fellow human' to another. At least not when it's nothing but humans.
Vassily studied her hair with his dark eyes, blinking. "It's a pleasure to meet you, fair lady."
"I have a boyfriend!," Rainbow Dash squeaked.
"It's okay," High Dive said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "I'm not jealous that easy."
Okay, he was a good choice for this mission.
"A pity," Vassily said.
Interesting, I thought. "We just arrived and must confess we know little of how best to obtain lodging here suitable for outsiders like ourself."
What followed was a thirty minute lecture on Sind, cultures, lodging and how to avoid getting killed by touchy high-caste people. Very useful and I wish Baron Golden Star had bothered to tell us all this, though some of it we knew from Celestia.
I frankly think he's up to something but I don't know what. Or maybe he's just annoyed he hasn't been told the whole story.
Fluttershy petted her serpent the whole time while I tried to tell my body and brain to stop thinking things which could only lead to trouble.
Vassily every so often glanced nervously at the snake, but kept up his routine.
Dash didn't blow our cover and asked some useful questions. So maybe this will go well.
This really would have been better with less people but we use what we have.
Okay, time to hit the Thyatians.
*************
STILL IVAN-O-VISION:
There is a poster of Erik of Vestland with the fifty thousand gold reward just outside the front door of the Thyatian embassy. Which, by the way, Baron Golden Star DID NOT MENTION.
On the other hand, he doesn't know we have Erik with us.
Still, dammit.
Breathe, I told myself, and we went inside.
Another round of introductions; in the middle of the lecture from this embassy's clerk, Fluttershy and I 'went to the bathroom'. I cloaked us both in shadows and she sent her serpent to slip around while we snuck around unseen. As long as we don't touch anyone, this is a really powerful trick and I am pretty sure it involves magical cheating and my path of Immortality. I care more about it working than how.
I can't keep it up nearly as long as Luna can, though. And I need people to not be looking.
Fluttershy naturally moves softly and quietly, so we easily snuck around, listening to conversations and her using her druidic magic to look for shapeshifters.
We found one. The records clerk is actually a doppleganger. Marcus is going to totally freak over this.
Then Slither came back and Fluttershy spoke to him. Her breath caught. "Apple Blossom is in the Ambassador's office."
Oh great, now I have to come up with some kind of plan very, very fast.
"Just her?" I asked.
I want to sneak in and spy but if this wears off and we're in his office... crap.
"And Pinkamena," Fluttershy said softly.
Dammit. "And her friends?"
"No sign of them," she said.
Distantly, I heard Rainbow Dash say, "I have a great love of riding stallions!" She sounded rather dreamy.
The clerk made an odd noise.
Oh Marcus, you just can't resist any kind of woman, I thought.
We crept up to where I could try and listen through the wall from another office.
"My understanding is that the four rhodolites are a sign of the now disbanded Older Gang," Pinkamena said smoothly with her usual grimness. "As you'd expect, they're all in an old age home in East Point now. Each of the rhodolites symbolized one of the gang members. Fire, Earth, Air, Water. The four elements, of course."
"Of course," the ambassador said. "Could it be their descendents?"
"It's possible but if so, this is their first job that anyone noticed their bragging symbol," Pinkamena said.
She was lying about something. I could recognize the signs. But I don't know why. Well, possibly some of her friends robbed the place. She does have four imaginary friends who aren't imaginary.
"I assure you, the Bronze Shanti will find out who did this," Apple Blossom said with her oddly elegant voice. "We do not appreciate unauthorized crime in our city." I have no idea what a Bronze Shanti is; some sort of gang she must control. "We will adhere to all past agreements, of course."
Oh hoh, so it has an alliance with Thyatis but now Apple Blossom and her allies have taken it over. Probably as part of their overall takeover plan.
I wonder if the doppleganger is hers. But none of us can... "Can you read minds?" I whispered to Fluttershy.
She shook her head. "Only non-sentients," she said softly.
I licked my lips thoughtfully, then rubbed my forehead.
Best to just listen and see what we can find out.
************
Still IVAN-O-VISION:
Unfortunately, we'd missed most of the conversation and Fluttershy and I had to come back before people thought we'd died in the bathroom or something. To my utter surprise, Dash hadn't blown our cover yet.
Thanks be to Asterius. And Luna. And anyone else who may have helped.
We slipped out and I told them what we'd learned. "The Bronze Shanti are based in the Ward of the Shell, wherever that is," I told them. "I expect I'll be sneaking around there tonight."
"Oooh, fighting Sindhi gangsters. Never done that, but it should be COOL," Rainbow Dash said.
"We shouldn't provoke them until your message is delivered, or it might cause an incident," High Dive said very seriously.
"Come on, don't you want to cut loose?" she said to him, gesticulating wildly as she talked.
"I am a soldier. We only cut loose off duty for fun," he said. "And I know you are dating Soarin'." He sounded kind of jealous.
"I hope he's okay and thinking of me," Dash said. "I think about him all the time." She sounded embarrassed.
Fluttershy patted her shoulder. "Love feels wonderful, I know."
"Have you ever had a boyfriend?" Dash said curiously.
"I dated one of my fellow druids during my training for a while," Fluttershy said. "Dancing Elk was very kind and gentle." She smiled brightly. "But he went to North Marech and I was sent to Ponyville." She sighed. "But it's better to love and lose than not love at all." She glanced at me for some reason. Not a secret crush reason but it must be something love related.
I don't know why.
An ornate carriage pulled by an Earth Pony wearing blue and red livery trundled down the street; an irritated man with coppery skin kept cracking a whip over the pony's head, but the blue and yellow pony just trundled along slowly, looking tired and bored. And a little jumpy. "Faster!" the man shouted.
"This street is too rough to go fast," the Pony protested. You couldn't see his cutie mark, unless it matched the glimmering silver sword embossed on the livery. I doubted it.
Rainbow Dash frowned as did High Dive. Fluttershy frowned even more and Slither hissed at the man, while I frowned deeply. Dammit. We can't afford to intervene but I hate watching this.
"If we have to stop and Kal-iya Ajith gets out, you'll regret being so picky," the man on the driving bench said. "You should be glad to have this job, Corn Husker."
The pony made a nervous noise. "Please, don't fire me. My wife is sick and my children too young to work."
I could hear Dash breathing hard. High Dive grimaced, but put a hand on her shoulder. Slither was wildly climbing all over Fluttershy as if trying to hide from it. And Fluttershy stared in horror, mouth wide open.
"Then MOVE FASTER," the man said, then looked at us. "What are you all staring at? This is none of your business."
"Are you trying to make him break his leg?" Rainbow Dash said. She pointed at the cobblestone road. "It looks pretty but it's irregular and not safe for high speeds. How's he supposed to pull the carriage if he hurts himself?"
Corn Husker stared at her in surprise, mouth wide open.
"Speed up!" a man shouted from inside the carriage. Kal-iya Ajith no doubt. Dammit.
"Don't worry, I'll be okay," Corn Husker said to Dash, making a gesture with his hoof which I think means 'don't press your luck', though I am only guessing. "Kal-iya Ajith will be very angry if I delay him any longer." He sounded rather drained and defeated.
Fluttershy started to speak, looked at her hands, then fell silent, still horrified.
I suddenly wondered how much that carriage weighs if an Earth Pony is actually tired from hauling it; it's not even dinner time so unless he's been pulling it since before dawn... Unless they made him skip lunch, maybe. Ponies who are working hard have to eat more, I think.
The carriage looked like ornate woods with silver and golden trim, shaped kind of like the top half of a pumpkin if you then put it on a board and put wheels under it. The silver sword motif was repeated.
This is where I wish I had the magic to make that thing break. But I have no talent for it, beyond the shadow trick Luna showed me.
I should steal the damn thing tonight but what would I do with it?
The driver said to Rainbow Dash, "Go back to Thyatis if you think you're in charge here, foreigner. With your stupid hair."
She stepped forward and High Dive pulled her back. "Pardon," he said. "My girlfriend is a little high strung. We'll just be moving on now."
"You'd best be moving on before Kal-iya Ajith decides to step out and make an example of you," the driver sneered at Rainbow Dash.
High Dive had to grapple her now and I decided we had best go before I snapped myself. This is the kind of thing I hate very much and I know I shouldn't do anything but I so want to rob this idiot and leave his carriage in flames.
A noble is a wolf on a horse, and wolves have to be shot to protect the farm.
Dammit.
"Kal-iya Ajith, you mean, mean person, come out of your carriage RIGHT THIS MINUTE," Fluttershy said, storming over.
Oh fuck. From what I've heard, if she gets this mad, it's basically apocalypse time.
The driver stared at her, mouth open wide.
Corn Husker stopped moving and stared at her, matching his expression.
"Who are you who dares to order ME, Kal-iya Ajith, to come forth?" the man inside shouted.
"I am Fillipa of Karameikos, a Druid of the Golden Ring!," Fluttershy said loudly. "Come forth and face divine judgement!"
"Fillipa," I said urgently. "We can't afford to get in trouble." Much as it hurts to let this bastard go.
"Yeah, Flipper, we have to avoid... avoid... dammit. GIVE THEM HELL!" Dash shouted.
The driver stopped the carriage. Corn Husker said, "No, no, no." He looked quite terrified.
Kal-iya Ajith came forth, a formidable looking man, tall and strong with tanned skin a little darker than mine, a thick moustache, shaped with butter or something like it, wearing expensive satin and silk robes in yellow and black. At his waist hung the silver sword he'd slapped on everything. It looked powerful, though not artifact level and I could probably buy my hometown if I had it.
"You have no right to challenge me," he said to Fluttershy. "Nor right to claim rank over me, for you do not follow our ways. And putting a snake around yourself hardly makes you a druid."
She began to sing and a cloud formed over his head. I pointed up and he looked, frowning and then lightning jabbed down all around him. Now he jumped.
Dammit, every whatever the magic people caste is called in the city probably felt that. We're going to have people swarming all over us in no time. But... I'm not getting near her when she's like this.
"I am a Druid of the Golden Circle and I will not stand by while you are cruel to one of your servants! You are a BAD, BAD boy," Fluttershy said, stepping closer and looking up into his eyes.
"You dare not pass... dare..." They locked gazes and the air crackled between them as Slither hissed angrily at him, curled around her arm and torso.
High Dive pulled Dash over by me. "Does this happen often?" he whispered urgently.
"No," Dash said. "But she's going to make him piss his pants." She sounded pleased by this.
I would be but now I'm worried we're going to get in more trouble.
People were starting to gather and stare and I could see someone run inside the Thyatian embassy.
Where Pinkamena and Apple Blossom are.
"FINISH HIM!" Dash shouted enthusiastically.
And then he broke and fell to his hands and knees, crying. "Enlightened master, I am sorry I dared to challenge you," he told her feet.
She patted his head. "It's okay. Now you're going to take poor Corn Husker home and pay to have his wife helped and make sure that his kids don't go hungry. It's a warrior's duty to protect the weak, not to exploit them."
"Yes, mistress," he mumbled.
Dash gave it a double thumbs up, then stared at her thumbs and laughed.
Once they were underway, I grabbed Fluttershy and we ran before anyone official showed up or the Elements came out.
But I expect they can figure out the rest if they don't already know.
Ack.
********************
Marcus-O-Vision Once More:
Baron Golden Star twitched at the news, then ran to his office. Oh boy.
Captain Keen Eyes said, frowning, "That was very noble and brave of you, Fluttershy."
She looked quite proud of herself. "I saved that poor hard-working pony and his family and taught him a lesson."
"But you may have caused a diplomatic incident which could get us thrown out of the country before you complete your mission, if they trace it to us," he continued, frowning.
Dammit. I agree with what Fluttershy did but also with the Captain... despite him being an asshole... about it risking blowing everything.
"Time for Ivan to be ponified and everyone else back to normal," Twilight said. "I..." She hesitated. "I would have done the same thing," she said softly. "But this does put us at more risk of mission failure, which could mean war. We can't afford to take any more chances like that."
"Well, only the lightning might be illegal, right?" Clyde said hesitantly. "Just mouthing off and staring is fair, I'd think."
"Mouthing off to a high caste person is a crime," Twilight said. "I will study the details later, or the Baron may know."
We were all milling around in the work zone.
High Dive said, "I'm sorry, sir." He saluted Captain Keen Eyes.
"You acted professionally," Captain Keen Eyes said. "Dash, never write checks with your mouth that you can't cash."
"I didn't write any checks!" she protested.
"You could have totally blown the mission," he said sternly.
"I didn't even DO anything," Dash protested. "Umm... how do I turn back to a pony?"
"It wears off after a few hours," I said.
Twilight concentrated and Dash and High Dive turned back to normal.
Fluttershy sighed. "I was starting to get good at this," she said mournfully, then turned back to pony form.
Her eyes widened.
"Eeeeee!!!!" She bolted off towards the part of the compound where our rooms are.
Rarity galloped after her. "I'll take care of her," she said.
"Well," Clyde said. "I guess we'd better hurry up before the law comes for us."
"I'm going to go see the ambassador," Twilight said. "I'll be right back."
Ivan got his potion out. "I only have a limited amount of this," he said.
"Save it until we're sure you'll need it," Captain Keen Eyes said, eyeing the bottle warily. "You ever been a pony before?"
"He went on a date with Princess Luna," Pinkie said cheerfully. "Does she kiss well?"
"It wasn't like that!," Ivan protested.
"Uh huh," I said. "You both even shapeshifted into the same race, you know."
"I was helping her cover!" Ivan protested.
And you made fun of me. HAH!
Captain Keen Eyes stared at Ivan in surprise, then said, "Alright then." His ears twitched. "Well, at least you didn't have the idiot with you."
"I'm right HERE," I said, annoyed.
"I trust Five Jacks High very much," Ivan said. "Even if he needs to remember the glass house he lives in. He would have kept out of trouble."
"Because he was scared," Captain Keen Eyes grumbled.
"Enough," Clyde said. "You can butt heads later. There's work to do. Now either get off my rocks or start digging," he said to both of us.
Captain Keen Eyes went to see the ambassador and I got down to digging.
***************
Eventually, it was time for dinner. The apocalypse hadn't happened yet, but this only made me more nervous. Clyde took me aside before dinner. "I understand you're some sort of shapeshifter?"
"I have been shapeshifted into this form as a disguise," I said ambiguously.
"Captain Keen Eyes, when not busy saying you are the source of all evil in this world, said you are a human," he continued, chewing on a piece of hay.
Dammit. Don't just tell everyone! Not that Clyde's likely to sell us out but the more who know the harder it is to hide. "Yes," I said. "My identity is a state secret."
He raised an eyebrow, then said, "Can you change people's shape?"
"If you really want to try being something else, we have candy but it only causes physical changes," I told him. "You don't gain that form's magic."
He looked at my horn and I said, "I'm a unicorn human when human. I have magic then too."
He sighed. "That's too bad."
Now I was curious. "What did you want to be?"
"My mother was a Pegasus. Surprise Pie," he said a little wistfully. "But father was an Earth Pony and I came out like him."
"Did she bomb dive people with pies?" I asked.
He blinked, looking surprised. "Yes, how did you know?"
Isn't it REALLY OBVIOUS? What sort of person names their pegasus child 'Surprise Pie' without teaching them to drop pies on people? Or them learning it themselves out of pure instinct?
"Just intuition," I told him. "So you'd like to see what being a pegasus is like?"
He looked around as if expecting someone to stop him. "Yes," he said softly.
"Well, you're in luck. Because if you want to fly, Twilight can hook you up. It's kind of tiring, but we're pretty much done for the day," I told him. "We'll have to make sure Captain Keen Eyes doesn't piss himself over it, though."
**************
Captain Keen Eyes insisted on Dash and five of the Pegasi going up. And posting Unicorn snipers. I don't think the air over the embassy is that dangerous but it was the price of him agreeing to it.
I helped Twilight cast it; we both then fell down on the grass and had to just watch what ensued. It wasn't quite what we expected. As we finished the spell, the energy suddenly changed, reconfiguring itself and energy shot through him. He howled and Twilight said, "No, stop, stop!" I could tell this wasn't right.
Him falling down howling wasn't part of it either and now we both tried to cancel the spell but it had a will of its own. On the sides of his torso, energy surged and then formed into wings which turned solid in the style of a pegasus. You could still see the magic inside them, inside him, his innate magics twisting around, and now winds kicked up around him, throwing dirt everywhere.
"Calm down, calm down!" Dash said, running over to him. The winds were picking up. "It's okay, it's just a spell," she said, then shot a worried look at us.
"I just wanted to put some extra juice in it to give him some extra time," Twilight mumbled, then stumbled into me. I felt weak myself.
Another of the Pegasi, Cloud Strider, who was off-white with a silver mane, rushed over, and Pinkie and Blinky both ran over as well, though the winds battered them.
Captain Keen Eyes said, "Can I assist you, Twilight?"
"And I, of course," Rarity said.
She drew on them for strength and recovered and the spell stabilized. Pinkie and Blinky soon calmed their father. His wings were brown like his coat, but tinged with purple at the tips of the feathers. His grey mane and tail had turned silver. He flapped his wings and rose off the ground, looked stunned, then smiled brighter than the sun at dawn. "Amazing. Don't go telling your mother, though."
Pinky laughed. "I'm sure she'd understand."
"She'd get pissed," Blinky said. "You know how she is."
"Mother loves us very much, even if she is strict. And there's nothing in the Works of Kagyar which forbids flight!" Pinkie said. "I read them ALL," she said proudly. The Works of Kagyar are the holy text of Kagyar worship.
As you probably guessed.
Blinky said, "You skimmed the chapter titles, maybe." She sounded very dubious.
"There's nothing," Clyde said. "But the wise man doesn't get in fights with his wife unless there's a point." He stretched his wings. "Lead me on, Dash."
"Oh yeah!" She took him soaring up into the air and the other Pegasi rose up and danced together in the sky. I was exhausted, lying on the grass with Twilight. Keen Eyes and Rarity plopped down next to us to watch, sitting sphinx style; we were just sprawled.
"Copter time!" Pinkie said; she'd taken her copter out of storage and assembled it. It doesn't fit through the opening of her saddlebags in one piece. "Come on, Blinky!"
"There isn't really room," Blinky said.
"We will SNUGGLE," Pinkie said and pulled her on, then took off into the sky to fly with them.
Blinky was soon screaming and setting a beat for the dance at the same time.
"Is Fluttershy okay?" I asked Rarity.
"She's okay," Rarity said. "Just a little embarrassed."
Captain Keen Eyes sighed. "She did a good thing but there are likely to be consequences."
There was a distant banging on the gate; the embassy had closed its doors for the night, but someone wanted in. Captain Keen Eyes sighed and cantered over to the gate where two of his Earth Ponies were having a conversation we couldn't hear; a Pegasus went in search of the Ambassador.
"I should do something," Twilight said.
"I advise you to lie here uselessly like me. We can pretend to be the Useless siblings," I told her.
"You made Mr. Pie very happy," Rarity said. "And Pinkie too. How long will it last?"
"I have to monitor it; I don't know. I'm not even sure why it did that instead of... It must be because he has pegasus ancestry," Twilight said. "I should consult the spell book. Spiiike."
Spike dug in her saddlebags and she started studying the book once he found it. "You need anything, Rarity?" he asked her.
"Could you be a dear and fetch us a small plate of those lettuce wraps?" she said. "I expect that Five Jacks High and Twilight need some food."
I just had dinner but I am RAVENOUS. "Oh PLEASE, Spike," I said urgently. "I would be grateful forever."
He snorted, but when Twilight said, "I could definitely go for Rarity's idea," Spike took off like a rocket.
The lettuce wraps had shredded vegetables, rice, and lettuce with garlic and a hint of saffron. So GOOD. I had to force myself not to just shovel them down my throat as fast as this pony mouth will eat them.
Which is fast.
One of the things I've noted is that ponies eat smaller meals than humans but more often. Smaller stomachs which digest slowly. So I have to be careful not to eat too much and make myself sick.
Captain Keen Eyes returned with an angry human druid with a golden torc and Baron Golden Star. The human had pale skin with a hint of red to it, dark brown eyes and long blond hair; he looked strong and he also looked ready to smack someone.
"I am Ral-iya Devdas," he said, arms folded across his chest. "Some of your ponies ravaged my grove."
He stared right at me.
"But I don't have any ponies," I said, confused. "Nor would I send any ponies to ravage your shrine. I don't even know where the druidic grove is in this city."
"You know I am a druid without me saying it!" he said angrily.
I managed to flop up to a sort of upright position and clumsily pointed at his belt. "Torc means druid," I said.
Fluttershy now peeked out of the building we sleep in. She saw Ral-iya Devdas and her eyes got wide.
Baron Golden Star said, "I am quite sure he was here the whole time; we have a lot of witnesses."
"I swear, I have no reason to wreck your shrine."
"You and your people painted moons all over it and proclaimed the glories of Princess Luna, whoever she is!" Ral-iya Devdas said angrily.
Fluttershy tried to hide but her snake began dragging her along as she yelped.
Ral-iya Devdas turned, saw her, and frowned. She looked like she wanted to die and hid her face with her wings. "She is a druid of the Golden Circle?" he said, displeased.
"She is a very fine druid but she is shy," Rarity said, then rose and cantered over to Fluttershy, talking to her quietly.
Crap; he may put two and two together... "Can't you do a truth ritual or something? I'll happily let you check my answer."
"We could do that," he said reluctantly. Clearly he fears to be proven wrong.
"Oooh, I'd like to see that," Twilight said, sitting up. "I'm sure Fluttershy could assist you."
I touched her mind with a spell. 'Twilight, this probably means that evil-me has been ponified and is busy leading Luna cultist raiders. They must be behind the cult. Maybe trying to convince the Sindhi that they have to invade Equestria before Luna finishes her 'plan of conquest' or some such rot.'
I could see Ivan coming. I did the spell again. 'Ivan, please don't rant about Luna's innocence to the man we're trying to mollify.'
Ivan grimaced but stayed back for now. Thanks, Ivan.
Fluttershy now came over, her snake marching alongside her through the grass and dirt. "Hail, Ral-iya Devdas, Druid of the Golden Circle. I am Fluttershy, Equestrian Druid of the Golden Circle. Rarity said someone wrecked your grove?" She frowned.
"Yes, and he was the leader," he said, pointing at me.
"He's never been out of the sight of one of us all day, except in the bathroom," Fluttershy said. She couldn't quite look Ral-iya Devdas in the eyes. "We should do the Rite of Truth if you will not accept my word."
"Let it be done," he said.
Ahaha. I laughed nervously. Let's hope this doesn't shapeshift me or set me on fire or something.
****************
This involved going to a corner of the torn up gardens and drawing a fancy rune in the dirt. He and Fluttershy sang and white chrysanthemums flowered at the corners of it. I stood in the middle nervously, feeling the magic flow around me.
The pegasi were still in the air with Clyde, Pinkie, and Blinky, but everyone else was watching this either curiously or nervously. Rarity had the sort of calm which always hides nervousness. Captain Keen Eyes, on the other hand, clearly enjoyed my discomfort.
Fluttershy and Ral-iya Devdas sang in unison, voices perfectly matched, and his usual glower faded as he lost himself in what he was doing. He doesn't look bad at all when he's not pissed off.
I felt the magic settle into me and he said, "I am Ral-iya Devdas." Green light flowed out of him into the rune and it lit up.
"I am Fluttershy," Fluttershy said and more light flowed from her into it. The light shone up around me, forming a tracery of power.
And then it lanced into my brain and I jumped.
"Identify yourself," Ral-iya Devdas said somberly.
"I am Five Jacks High, agent of Celestia," I said. That part I intended. "I walk the road of the Polymath under hers and Luna's guidance," I continued. THAT WAS NOT EVEN NECESSARY. Ack!
He started, then stared at me. "That certainly can't be true."
Captain Keen Eyes whispered to Twilight, who whispered back, then he frowned.
"I have lived many lives and been reborn many times," I continued.
"Did you raid his grove?" Fluttershy asked me.
"No, I did not raid his grove. I have never seen or heard of him before tonight," I told them.
"You may ask a question," Ral-iya Devdas said reluctantly.
"Do you always rush off to judgement without thinking it through?" I said irritably.
He grimaced and then said, "It is a frequent problem of mine." Now he looked VERY aggravated.
Oh hoh ho, it binds us all. But he probably doesn't know anything useful.
"Have you committed any crimes in Sind at all?" Ral-iya Devdas asked, frowning.
"I am innocent of all but malice," I told him. I love that line. I got it from a book.
Fluttershy said, "Have you caused any trouble at all for Ral-iya Devdas?"
"No, other than making him embarrass himself," I said. "Devdas," I began.
"Ral-iya Devdas," he insisted.
"Ral-iya Devdas, did you have any other reasons to come looking for me beyond thinking I trashed your shrine?" I asked.
"No. Do you know anything about the attack on the shrine?" he asked.
I wonder how many questions we all get. And dammit, I didn't want that question.
"I have an evil twin named Sammy who probably impersonated me," I told him. "But that's only a guess."
"Umm... do you like Slither?" Fluttershy said, clearly out of good ideas.
"Snakes make me nervous ever since the incident on the Isle of Dread. Stupid Yuan-ti," I said, laughing nervously.
Fluttershy looked disappointed. Dammit! Telling people what they want to hear is IMPORTANT.
"Ral-iya Devdas, what is it going to take for me to get you to go away and stop bothering me?" I asked him.
He grimaced. "The ritual is over. I neither like nor trust you, but the rite was true. I will go."
Thank the Immortals.
The energy faded.
"But I will have my eye on you. You reek of deceit," he told me angrily. "Where did this clone come from?"
"I don't trust you enough to tell you that," I told him as the energy faded. "And that's no lie."
Now he looked really offended. "We shall see which one of us proves true. I will have my eye on you." And then he stormed off.
"Well, he's not a shifter," Twilight said.
"Just an ass in the form of a man," I muttered.
"He had good reason to worry," Fluttershy said. "But he was very rude." She sighed.
"Why not tell him about the Elements?" Applejack said, frowning.
"Because we don't know who he is connected to. I should have thought to ask useful things but he pissed me off and I wasted my questions snarking." I sighed. "Sorry."
"His ill manners were enough to make anyone unhappy," Rarity said. "Feeling better, Fluttershy?"
"A little," she said, cuddling Slither, who now calmed down. "I wish Angel was here too, though. And my other friends. There's no animals here and you can't cuddle plants." She sighed.
So Rarity cuddled her until she smiled and I flopped down in the grass wondering what was going to blow up next.
Still, that could have been MUCH worse.
**************
Fluttershy took me aside before bed. We sat on a patch of grass which was one of the bits of greenery not destroyed for the improvised rock farm. "I... was I acting strange? Fillipa me, that is?" she said hesitantly.
"Well, you were bolder, but you still had the same interests and... you did kind of slap down that warrior, which surprised me a lot," I told her.
She sighed. "I lost myself again." She buried her face in her hooves. "I really like Slither but... now I'm so embarrassed. Why can't I turn into other things and still be me like other druids?" She looked really frustrated.
"Is it easier for you to change than other druids?" I said with a vague idea.
"Yes," she said.
"Well, I think maybe your tie to animals means you don't hold back as much as other druids," I told her. "Now I wonder if maybe you could actually use the special abilities of things because of that."
"It's risky to test, since I might lose myself and go on a rampage," she said, then studied an ant slowly making its way through the grass.
"You probably could actually challenge the head druid in human form, though," I mused.
"I have to be able to do it as me," she said. "I'm mostly content with my rank. I just want to shapeshift properly." She sighed. "It wasn't as bad because humans aren't as different from us as I thought. Some parts were really strange," she said. "But I guess being a pony is strange to you too, right?" she said hesitantly.
"It's very strange," I told her. "The way I can smell people, the way my body moves, what I want to eat, all that."
"Have... ahaha..." She turned red. "I shouldn't get so embarrassed," she told the ant.
"No, not yet. I'm not that comfortable," I told her. Plus, I know her father would walk in and kill me dead.
"I'm sure he wouldn't... kill you much," she said quickly.
Dammit, externalizing my monologue AGAIN.
"When I was human, I missed being able to smell everyone; it's so much harder to tell how everyone feels when you're human," she said, sighing.
"I'm good at telling," I told her. "When I don't get all bitchy. Like with that idiot druid."
"He just wanted to protect his grove," she said a little chidingly.
Slither encircled her and she stroked his head gently as he made happy snake noises. "Everyone looked at me oddly when I was cuddling Slither while human," she said hesitantly.
"There's something about female snake-charmers which makes a man's brain spin," I told her. "Especially because you were so utterly fearless."
"Fearless? Me?" she said, stunned.
"I know the feeling," I mumbled.
"You're brave, you just complain about having to be brave," she said kindly. "So are you enjoying being a pony?"
"I wouldn't want to do it all the time, but I think that a person can get used to anything," I told her. "I can handle it the rest of this trip, though if someone is impersonating me, this identity isn't going to be much use either." I frowned.
"Well, if you ever have any questions, I'll be glad to help," she told me, then sighed. "I don't know if I should try it again for the meeting."
"Fall down seven times, get up eight," I told her. "They say that in Ochelea, I think. If you keep trying, you will learn how to do it."
"Ahahahah!" I heard Clyde laughing. He was still flying with Dash and two other pegasi.
I was too tired and too far to tell if the spell was wearing off or not. Surely Twilight couldn't permanently turn him into a pegasus. Even to do it temporarily... She is the Element of Magic.
She rose. "I'm going to go fly with them for a while."
"Keep an eye on him. Assuming Twilight hasn't changed him forever, then he will eventually lose those wings," I told her. I yawned. "I have to sleep. And probably he should come down soon and sleep anyway."
"More sugar, Blinky, to fuel my legs!" Pinkie shouted in the darkness above.
"Dammit, Pinkie, you already ate enough for three people!" Blinky shouted.
"Bang a drum, give me the sugar gum!" Pinkie commanded.
What?
Definitely time for bed. "Goodnight, Fluttershy."
"Goodnight, Five Jacks High."
I went to bed.
***************
Clyde was still a pegasus in the morning and everyone was boggling. Twilight looked a little spooked all morning but by lunch, was back to normal. We just worked like dogs all day.
By evening, it was clear we were getting results, though Twilight, Rarity, and I were practically zombies. I stumbled into bed and slept deeply.
"I did some more poking around," Ivan announced at breakfast. "There's dopplegangers hidden in the Darokin, Five Shires, and Karameikan embassies but none of the others."
"You went on your own?" I said. "That's dangerous."
"I am very sneaky now," he said. "And I have these." He jangled the lockpicks.
Captain Keen Eyes said, "You could have at least told us."
"You might have stopped me," he said, grinning.
Ahahah.
"I'll try poking around the Radhirajah's place tonight," Ivan said. "See if he's got any surprise fun on his staff."
"I can't let you go alone," Captain Keen Eyes said.
I can't deny he takes guarding us seriously.
"I can sneak MUCH easier on my own," Ivan said.
"He'll just sneak away from your guards," I told Captain Keen Eyes, who grimaced at me. "But really, you should take someone," I told Ivan. "I don't think I can sneak well like this or I'd go with you."
The magical instincts don't cover hiding, unfortunately.
"I will go," Twilight said. "I can shrink myself and ride in your pocket. And I can spot shapeshifters. We need to know in advance."
"Celestia will not be happy if I let you go into danger without a guard," Captain Keen Eyes said urgently.
"I trust Ivan to protect me and I can teleport us out," Twilight continued.
o/~ My little pocket pony
o/~ Whever I go, she goes.
o/~ My little pocket pony
o/~ Helps me with what she knows.
o/~ My little pocket pony
o/~ Has a cute little nose.
It was, of course, Pinky.
"I don't need a theme song," Twilight said to her urgently, looking a little embarrassed.
"Sure you do! Oh man, I have to write one for Dad now that he can fly!," Pinkie said. She got paper and began scribbling furiously with a quill pen in her mouth.
"Take High Dive with you. He's good at stealth," Captain Keen Eyes said to Ivan. "And he can fly you two out if teleports are blocked, which I know I would do if I had a palace and ruled an entire country and there were thousands of potential assassins with teleport spells. Which there are."
"True," Twilight said, then looked at Ivan.
"Fine," Ivan said. "You don't trust me to handle myself. He can come." He looked pretty irritated.
"I'm sure Ivan will be fine with just him and Twilight," I said. I do think that AND I need to back up Ivan.
Twilight looked rather uncomfortable being caught in the middle of this.
"Rocket Dad, taking off at the speed of light... no, doesn't work," Pinkie mumbled as she kept writing.
"Going solo is rarely wise," Blinky said very seriously to Ivan. "One should always work with at least one partner. It means that ideally, you'll cover each other's back and counter each other's worst ideas while covering each other's weaknesses. The quest for individual glory ends always in disaster. Teamwork is the key to success, Kagyar teaches. Plus, Twilight can shrink him too, so he won't make much noise."
Ivan blinked, then looked at Blinky.
"Yeah, going solo's for arrogant pegasi, not that I know any," Applejack said.
"Hey!" Dash said. "I'm not arrogant! I'm just THE BEST."
Ivan and Blinky looked at each other in a way that I'd almost think was a mind-touch spell, but since neither of them can cast spells, I doubt it. Though Ivan might have some trinket. I tend to love gold, jewels, jewelry and other things I can spend on luxuries. Ivan loves magical widgets.
"So you're saying you want to come too," he said softly to Blinky.
What?
Blinky's eyes got wide. "I just...Well, I mean... if you want me to." She laughed nervously.
"No, it's too dangerous!" Pinkie said, pouncing on Blinky to my surprise. "I couldn't stand it if you got hurt." She sounded quite worried.
"I am an adult pony and I can take care of myself," Blinky said fiercely to her sister. "Do you think I like watching you do the insane things you do?"
"Yes, but I can only hurt me if I do something crazy," Pinky said. "I'm going to worry about you all night now."
"Now you know how it feels," Blinky muttered, but hugged her.
Captain Keen Eyes looked over at Clyde. "You're going to let her do this?" he said in surprise.
"She's a grown pony. I'd go myself, but they already got a pegasus. HAH!" He flapped his wings and looked pleased with himself. "Eventually, kids leave the nest and you have to let them fly free." He looked at Dash.
Dash nodded.
What?
Rarity made a happy noise and pushed her hair back, looking pleased.
"Rarity, I'm going to need more pockets," Ivan said to her.
Rarity smiled. "Of course, darling. Come with me and we'll get you suited up properly."
"Be careful," Pinkie said to Blinky.
Blinky fell down and began rolling around, laughing.
"I'm serious! Be careful!" Pinkie said.
Blinky crashed into her father's legs, bounced off and rolled into Pinkie. "AHAHAHAHAHAH!"
"Don't pick the one time I can't laugh to start laughing more than me!" Pinkie said frantically.
Now I laughed and soon everyone was laughing.
Pinkie finally gave into the mood and laughed herself. "I just want you to be safe. You're not used to a life of adventure, Blinky. You always worked hard so you could run the farm one day. You'll be a very good farm boss one day." She patted her sister's side as her sister lay at her feet. "I am proud of you."
"Thanks, sister," Blinky said and rose. "Hmm, maybe we should wear masks or something."
"We can make disguises later," Twilight said.
They'd better be REAL disguises and not the kind of cheesy thing Don Diego does.
*************
Rarity helped make the disguises, along with Spike. What did this mean?
It meant all four of them had full body black clothing, a top hat, a moustache, and a comedy mask in gold. (With the moustache on the mask, yes.) And black capes with a red lining.
Then Twilight shrank herself and the other two going on the raid: Twilight rode in Ivan's shirt pocket, High Dive got put into a jacket pocket and Blinky into the other jacket pocket. (The jacket used to have no pockets.)
Twilight looked ridiculously cute sticking up out of the shirt pocket, forelegs over the edge of it and dangling down. Blinky had to struggle for a bit to get herself positioned the same way but High Dive did it easily. He saluted Captain Keen Eyes, who saluted back. "Good luck," Captain Keen Eyes said.
"Thanks," Ivan said. "Don't worry, it will be fine." Then he looked thoughtful. "Dash."
Dash saluted, then laughed. "Yes?"
"I need you to stage a fake drunken brawl with someone in the sky over the city near the palace. Just enough to draw attention," he said. "Captain, she'll need one of your men to brawl with. Keep it in the sky so there's no damage and we don't get in trouble."
"You are asking me to get drunk and get in a fight with someone," Dash said slowly.
"Well, umm, yes, but you only need to fake getting drunk," Ivan said.
"WHISKEY FUELED VIOLENCE HERE I COME!" Dash shouted, heading for the wine cellar.
Ahahah.
"Fake it!" Captain Keen Eyes shouted, running after her.
"The best lie is the TRUTH!" Dash shouted and vanished out of sight into one of the buildings.
Ahahahahahaha.
**************
Right as they left, all the pegasi jumped, except Clyde who looked confused, THEN jumped when he saw the others do it. I couldn't help but laugh a little. "What was that?" he said.
"Storm's coming," one of the soldier Pegasi said.
"Storms only happen when rain is scheduled, here in Sayr Ulan. The oasis can make only modest amounts of rain by itself, so they deliberately shape storms and haul them here every so often," Baron Golden Star said. "Most of Sind has freaky random weather, but one nice thing about being posted here is the controlled climate inside the oasis."
It reminds me of Ylarum City; Ylarum City is inside an oasis surrounded by desert and has climate control. The Ylari want to terraform their country green and the oases are the start of this. A lot of pegasi get paid very well to come help them. Most of Ylarum is very pony-friendly, though Abbashan in the east tends to try to force any resident ponies to convert to the Eternal Truth, the state religion.
"And there's not one scheduled?" Applejack said, frowning.
"I would be... or at least SHOULD be notified," Baron Golden Star said.
Captain Keen Eyes frowned. "Sandwich."
What kind of cruel parent names their child Sandwich?
Sandwich was dark grey with a neon green mane; his cutie mark was a six layered sandwich. "Yes, sir!" he said eagerly.
"Take your five men and check out the storm," he said. "Baron, how do we consult the authorities?"
"I'll send a runner," he said.
"Fluttershy, could this be Dragonfly's work?" I asked her.
"Entirely possible," Fluttershy said. "I'll go with them."
The rest of us got ready for any trouble.
****************
The storm hit, dumping huge amounts of rain as we all took shelter inside, played cards and watched the rain while fretting. I had just tossed the Six of Stones and the Five of Flames (I still had the Three of Stones, Three of Flames, and Three of Shadows), when Baron Golden Star entered the lounge we were in, just as Clyde carefully tossed out the Ten of Flames and the Jack of Waves. Does he have a three of a kind too?
"The storm is unscheduled and Fluttershy and my men will assist the Radhirajah's people in moderating it. It's been decided a little extra rain would not hurt as long as it is less intense," Baron Golden Star told us. "I am pleased by this shining example of cooperation between our people and Sind, and I hope your visit to him will go as smoothly." HIIIINNNNT.
We get it.
"Sir, outside, look!" an aide said, running in.
We all went out to look, huddling on the porch where we had a roof.
Through the rain, you could see the moon. Luna's face looked down from it, though now it began to fade.
Was she scrying or was this a trick of the cult?
I assume a trick as it does kind of give the game away.
"Spike, send Luna a letter about this," Rarity said.
She dictated a letter and he sent it. "I hope Twilight is okay," he said.
I felt a sudden large spike of magic and everypony... every unicorn pony... turned their head towards the palace. Oh bloody hell.
"Okay, we're on alert," Captain Keen Eyes said and began disposing everyone to battle positions. I followed along; this IS his kind of situation. Best we be ready.
And then nothing but rain happened as we all became more and more jumpy. Clyde watched the rain stolidly, looking bored if anything.
The wind shifted and for a moment, I smelled something... it made me feel a burst of panic. I didn't even know why. "Rarity, can you smell it?" I asked.
She sniffed the wind. "Something dangerous but I don't know it. I just..." She frowned. "It smells of predator."
Spike sniffed the air. "And garlic."
Thanks, Spike, I'm sure evil garlic comes for us now.
Pinkie paced around her stack of battle-ready pies agitatedly. "Blinky," she mumbled.
"Blinky's fine. Have some trust in your sister," Clyde said. "She is an Earth Pony and Earth Ponies endure. I trust each and every one of my daughters to make their own choices and do the right thing." He chewed on his usual piece of hay. "It didn't come easy to me, but I've learned you have to do that or go crazy."
We heard the sound of a stampede on the street. One of the sniper unicorns, holed up in a crow's nest the soldiers had built on the roof of one of the buildings, reported, "Sir, the squad of cavalry which normally guards the custom house is bolting towards the palace."
"We have to do something!" Pinkie said.
"We hold our ground," Clyde said to her. "We don't know if this is any of our business."
"But Father, she could be hurt! She could be..."
"Dig in your hooves," he said sternly.
"But..."
"Dig in your hooves," he barked.
She jumped and then got into a kind of stance where she dug in her hooves and braced herself.
He sighed. "I'm sorry. Just calm down, Pinkie. Don't go finding things to worry about that haven't happened yet like your mother does."
"Blinky's just a..."
"She's grown up now," her father said, then sighed. "Of course, we don't see you enough for it to really sink in."
HIIIIINTTTTT.
"Oh wait, I bet the 'drunken brawl' is what drew those cavalry," I said. "Maybe it's just the diversion."
"Well, they had bows, but I would hope they wouldn't respond to two people having a drunken fist fight with three lances of cavalry," Captain Keen Eyes said, frowning.
"Sir, a pair of Elves have hijacked a wagon and are being chased by two more wagons of..." Magical darkness now rushed over everything.
Bloody hell.
I made my horn glow; I could see the region around me but not any of the other unicorns.
I could hear Clyde banging his hoof on the ground. "Everyone tap your hoof," he said.
Hooves tapped all over. We began regrouping more tightly in the darkness and then the darkness faded away. The chase was gone and now the cavalry went past us.
By the time we were all ready to go crazy, Ivan and company suddenly stepped out from behind one of the buildings inside the compound. "Hey guys, any idea what the big magic spike was?"
"It wasn't you?" I said.
Tiny-Twilight said, "It came from the area where the organized crime group is. I think they got robbed."
Man, those two elves were either very brave or very insane.
Maybe both.
"What did you find out?" Captain Keen Eyes asked.
"We fingered seven dopplegangers inside the palace staff," Twilight said. "One of them was talking to Niccolo Aurelianus," she continued.
Ivan grimaced. "Sell out," he said grimly.
"Did you see the giant Luna face on the moon?" I asked.
Ivan stared. "What?"
Twilight's mouth dropped open.
"Blinky!" Pinkie said, snatching her up and hugging her tiny-sister.
"I'm just FINE," Blinky said. "Except Ivan's pockets smell like leather."
"They're made of leather, darling," Rarity said. "It is somewhat inevitable they will, in fact, smell like leather." She sounded a little offended.
"I'm not a cat, I don't need to be petted," Blinky grumbled as Pinkie petted her.
"You're so CUTE like this," Pinkie said excitedly. "My little pony sister!"
High Dive flew out of the pocket and over to report to Captain Keen Eyes.
Twilight smiled at Pinkie and Blinky, then said, "Tell me about this Luna on the Moon thing."
We told her what little we knew.
Someone was at the gate; it turned out to be the Darokinian ambassador, Madeline Umbarth. She was a stout woman, well dressed with dark black hair and vivid orange eyes, which surprised me. Humans don't normally have orange eyes. She and Baron Golden Star went off to talk, while her guards lounged about, talking to the staff; clearly they came here often.
A letter now appeared by Spike, from Luna.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Spike and Friends,
That was not me and it was a local effect. I have alerted certain authorities just to be sure. But my current evidence indicates it was a localized illusion. I have included a second letter for you to give to the Radhirajah's with Celestia's letter.
If anyone knows who is powering the 'Luna cult' here, they are not talking but I suspect it's Marjorie. Keep your eyes open. I have included an amulet I would like Twilight to wear; it will indicate if any other Immortal's power is being used near her and transmit the information to me. I have also included a ring I would like Ivan to wear of a similar nature.
Please give my best wishes to Pinkie's father and sister and thank them for assisting you. Celestia and I are always pleased by the kind and generous nature of our Ponies. They are an inspiration to all Equestrians.
Should I learn anything else of relevance, I will inform you.
Your friend and monarch,
Princess Luna of Equestria
PS: Tell Applejack and Rarity that their sisters and their friends are building a truly magnificient tree house which makes me regret I am too old to play in it. It may well be the best treehouse ever.
PPS: Lyra asked me to tell Marcus that she will soon have the script ready for him to start memorizing.
PPPS: Sweetie says she misses her sister and big brother and father, but having her mother here is very nice.
PPPPS: Celestia said things I am not going to repeat; she can send her own letter if she wants to tease someone. I love you all and good luck.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ahaha.
A letter fell on my head.
AHAHAHAHA.
Everyone turned and looked at me. "I'll read it later," I mumbled.
Rarity said, "You don't have to read it out loud, darling. I'm sure she only teases you because she likes you." She now pulled out her thimbles and gave me a gentle back rub. Oh yes that feels good.
I licked my lips nervously. "Okay."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Five Jacks High,
Please laugh nervously and twitch so Luna never finds out I didn't actually tease you in this letter.
Please tell Twilight I will be sending her a copy of Moon Magics, once the librarians track it down.
That is all; good luck on your mission and please fake freaking out a little so I can keep my cover up. You are such a dear.
Your friend and mentor,
Princess Celestia.
PS: Our first boy should be named Far Runner, I think. I know you'll train him well.
~~~~~~~~~~~
I laughed nervously, then said, "Celestia is going to have a book sent to you, Twilight. Which may help with the crisis. On Moon Magic."
"Ooooh," Tiny-Twilight said, then turned herself and the other two back to normal. "Let's get some sleep. Tomorrow, we SPRING OUR TRAP!"
Let's hope it works.
************
We cleaned up the garden, and we'd sent announcements everywhere stating that 'fine Equestrian Jewels' would be on display today. Hopefully, Clarity will walk into our trap.
Then we all hid and/or disguised ourselves. Twilight and I were up with some of the unicorns in a large hunting blind we'd set up on the roof, designed to look like a tower... okay, it basically WAS a tower.
She glanced at me, then said, "I... Five Jacks High..."
I tried to subtly point to the other unicorns up here. Two of whom were eyeing her when they were SUPPOSED to be watching for trouble. This vastly annoyed me.
She touched her horn to mine. This makes mind-touch spells much easier, not that she really needs 'easier'. 'I want to be friends,' she said firmly. 'Like we used to be before I messed it up.'
'It was MY fault, not yours,' I told her. 'You tried to be honest with your feelings and I ran screaming. I want to make it up to you. However you feel is right.'
One of the unicorns was giving me the evil eye and I don't even know why. He has a name... dammit, I should know all their names by now.
'I will figure something out. Anything like that has to wait until we are done here,' she said.
'Agreed,' I said. 'Maybe I could do some research for you when we are done here.'
'Hmm, we could finish that project we started together before... then,' she said thoughtfully.
'Sure. But which one?'
We both laughed nervously. We'd started a half dozen projects and then I'd run for the hills. We kept seeing things that hadn't been figured out yet and then we'd see another one and...
Stupid beholder.
'I really have to find some way to get Spike to unhate me,' I told her. 'It's not healthy for him to hang on forever to his crush on Rarity.'
'I know,' she said. 'We can figure it out later.'
Spike was downstairs with Rarity, watching over the gems. So was Applejack. I had insisted that since we two were apparently the only people on this planet not easily fooled by disguises, she would watch the gems on display and I would watch guests come in.
"We have more people, or are you two busy making out?" one of the unicorns, brown coated and blue maned with a silver star in a circle as his cutie mark, said irritably. His name is Far Caller and he summons things.
"I totally would never, ever, ever steal Rarity's coltfriend however... AT ALL," Twilight said frantically.
"I would not cheat on my girlfriend, the best unicorn in the world!" I said angrily.
"Then PAY ATTENTION," he said. The other unicorns seemed to agree with him.
Bastards.
That being said, I now turned to watch. It was a group of Sindhi nobles. I sighed.
"Look at her," Twilight said, pointing to a brunette with long hair up in a bun, fanning herself with a fan painted with yellow crysanthemums. "She's shapeshifted, but is not a doppleganger."
"It could be Clarity," I said. She had three strong men with her of the warrior caste; she had the caste mark of the warriors as well, but that could just mean she was the daughter of one or married to one.
"No horn," one of the Unicorns said. "Doesn't the horn of a unicorn usually persist?"
I looked at Twilight.
"Not universally but in many cases, yes," Twilight said. "If my evil twin did this, the horn would show. But Clarity's hair may be another color if she thought to change it."
"Hmm, you could probably design a hat which would fit over a horn and hide it, right?" I said. "Given the sparse number of wealthy Ponies here, she might well get Dawn Gleaming to turn her human and put on a hat to hide her horn. Assuming she doesn't just sneak in. As we don't know if she's very stealthy."
"Or she may be shrunken and hidden in a pocket," Twilight said.
"Unless she uses magic, we couldn't likely find her then," one of the unicorns said, frowning.
I peered out the window; more Sindhi coming in. Too many with various kinds of hats. Bah.
I mean, I like hats, but... Aaargh, hats have turned against me!
This made me feel kind of depressed, though touching my own hat made me feel a little better.
Then I spotted a surprise. Corn Husker and his family. I'm surprised he got the day off. I hope this doesn't mean he got fired. But they seemed too... they were all VERY nervous but not unhappy like you'd expect if he lost his job.
A lot of the Sindhi coming in frowned at them and we all frowned down at them. This IS the Equestrian embassy you know. Punks.
I wish I could do something for them. They deserve better than the kind of life they have to live. But I don't really know what I could do; I can't exactly change how this country works just by wanting it.
Dammit. I felt very frustrated.
Several Glantrians now came in; you could tell because they were all from New Averoigne; there's a distinctive style of dress, and they all favored the kind of flat, floppy hat popular there. One of them could pull off a beret, but most of them... no.
I'd talk to them about buying Rarity one but you need MUCH flatter hair than hers for it to work... Dash or Twilight might be able to pull it, though.
Or Applejack but it wouldn't suit her.
She came out now, all frou-froued up as she put it, wearing a fancy dress and her hair piled up. I wondered again why the Glantrians were talking to Corn Husker and looking at his young daughter; like him, the whole family were Earth Ponies. The daughter had a blue coat and short yellow mane like her father. She also had the caste marks on her cheeks, which made me grimace. They all did.
One of the Glantrians kneeled by her and held out a gem. She put her hoof on it, closed her eyes, and concentrated hard. The gem began to fitfully pulse with light and her whole family stared, eyes wide.
Then there was a flash of light and a book appeared on her previous blank flank. Applejack had joined them now and she was staring. The daughter was clearly stunned.
The Glantrian shook her hoof, then put the gem in his pocket and began speaking excitedly with Corn Husker.
There are a few Earth Ponies who get into Wizardry, since that or being a Bard is the only way they can weild Arcane Magic to my knowledge. But it's very hard for them. Like Dwarves, they don't take to it easily and their innate magic flows other directions.
"I have to talk to her," Twilight said.
I put a paw... hoof. A hoof on her. "We have to stay in our stations."
"But she..."
"Applejack's talking to her. None of us can recognize incoming shifters but you," I told her.
She sighed.
"Duty comes first," one of the Unicorns said. "Even when it isn't easy."
Corn Husker and his family now went inside with the Glantrians and Applejack all talking to them at once; Captain Keen Eyes now came out and joined the conversation; he looked a little stunned.
Whatever her name is, she's found her ticket out of this town and her family's fate.
An Earth Pony with a wizardry Cutie Mark. Hopefully a good sign and not one that unlikely yet disastrous things will soon happen.
Ahahaha.
Then it hit me. "Did we ever find out what made the storm?" I asked.
"Arcane magic and weatherpony power," Twilight said, frowning.
"Maybe it was a diversion for something the Elements of Power got up to?" I said. "We never did find an answer for what the magic surge was."
"Makes sense," Twilight said, then frowned. "Doppleganger," she said, pointing to a halfling who entered with a half dozen others.
One of the Unicorns grimaced. "Why bother turning into a halfling?"
"Halflings are hard working people who don't go bad-mouthing other people for existing," I snapped at him. Having BEEN one, I felt the urge to defend them. "Do you want to act like the snotty people here who think Ponies are inherently inferior?"
That shut his mouth. Punk.
We kept watching; if Clarity was here, she was being subtle. Though she might come back tonight; too many witnesses.
The shapeshifted woman... she worried me.
"Twilight, this will sound stupid, probably but do you have a spell to detect gangsters?" I said.
"Why would I... OH," she said. "Except for mind-reading, I don't think there's a good magical way to determine profession like that. Or at least, I don't have a spell for it with me."
"There's probably some sort of gang mark or sign," one of the Unicorns said. "Right?"
"Yes," I said. "But we have no clue what it is."
"Wait, we do have a clue. The group is the 'Bronze Shanti'. Ergo, something bronze will be their sign," Twilight said. "Shanti..." She frowned. "I... oh wait, I should have a dictionary!"
She dug through it, then said, "Inner Peace? That can't be right."
"Maybe it's sarcasm," one of the Unicorns said.
"Maybe it's a reference to some philosophy where you rise through ranks known as Shanti? With Bronze as one of the lower ones?" another speculated.
We continued speculating as we watched the guests come in.
*************
If Clarity was there, she didn't show herself, but I came down to check in with those below and to keep an eye on the shapeshifted woman. Ivan was talking excitedly with Corn Husker and his family, at the same time the Glantrians were talking to them also. Understandably, he looked a little overwhelmed.
Ivan looked like a Northman; he'd taken some of his potion to disguise himself since someone might come in who would recognize him from the duel incident. A wise precaution, I see.
"Any news, Ivan?" I asked him.
He subtly gestured at the shapeshifted woman. I nodded to him.
"I was telling them about having met Princess Luna and Celestia," he said to me.
Corn Husker said, "Is she as kind as they say?" He sounded nervous which I suspect is his natural state.
"Yes," Ivan said. "She is kind and gentle. And very hard working, as you'd expect of an Earth Pony."
"She's not an Earth Pony," Corn Husker said. "She is higher, she is an alicorn, a goddess. An Immortal."
"She is," Ivan said. "Earth Pony, Pegasus and Unicorn all at once. And the Immortals were hu... mortals once," he continued.
I grinned a little.
Corn Husker started to say something, then sagged; his wife and daughter were talking to the Glantrians; his daughter looked THRILLED by her good luck.
"It's weird, I got this... thrill when I stepped inside. I could feel something, from up above," the daughter said. "I'd always hoped, but I knew Earth Ponies couldn't do magic. Not so easily as Unicorns, anyway. And I'd never get a chance to study and learn here." She sighed. But then she smiled. "But now I can! I'm going to be a wizard!"
"You should talk to Twilight before you go," I told her. "Oh, I'm Five Jacks High, one of Celestia's agents. Ivan here is my usual partner in getting in trouble."
"They're good at it," Applejack said, then laughed.
I laughed nervously. "Well, yes."
Everyone laughed now, even Corn Husker.
"You are very fortunate," Corn Husker said to Ivan softly.
"Here, let me show y'a... you all the jewels," Applejack said. She took them to see the jewels and I got Ivan to brief me, which was that suspicious woman was going around, studying the jewels somewhat covetously, but she seemed unlike to be a Unicorn, whatever her true nature. No sign of spells or anything.
Could be one of the other Elements.
She's either very brave, insane, or both to try slipping in here when... But does she know we're here? We don't know.
On the other hand, she must have seen Applejack; even in the outfit Applejack's wearing, she'd recognize Applejack.
We can't start a fight with all these people unless we have to. Hmm, on the other hand, if we let her go, we can follow her back to her base. Which would be good to find.
I went round and round in my head, then decided to just go find Captain Keen Eyes and tell him what we know, much as I don't like him.
I told him everything and he looked thoughtful. "I'll have one of my men follow her," he said. "She may or may not actually be connected to any of our foes."
I went back up to the watchtower to fret.
*************
Clarity did not appear clearly as herself but we identified more dopplegangers. Twilight compiled a list of people to inform; we would time it so the messages were delivered to relevant leaders at the same time as our audience; ideally this would avoid tipping them off that we were onto them too early.
That night, we stayed up, watching and waiting to see if Clarity made her raid for the jewels. We left a deliberate hole in the defenses; ideally this would let her in, then we could seal it and trap her. And Twilight had put up wards against teleportation to ensure no easy escape.
Blinky now said, "Something's under us. It's digging up into the embassy."
Clyde's eyes widened. "What?"
"Towards the jewels?" I asked.
"Towards the jewels," she confirmed.
We ringed the area and waited tensely.
Then the giant purple worm erupted upwards, swallowing the jewels. Purple worms are giant worm like creatures, about twenty feet across, which tunnel under ground and eat rock.
Strangely, Clyde looked relieved it was a giant worm and not... whatever he'd been worried about.
"It's made of shadow magic!" Twilight said. "This must have been made by Dawn Gleaming! I'm going to try to dispel it!" She concentrated, horn blazing and Rarity, Captain Keen Eyes, and I aided her as much as we could.
Blink, it vanished and the jewels fell down the shaft.
"Pegasi, CHARGE," Captain Keen Eyes shouted and they rushed down the tunnel, including Rainbow Dash and Clyde.
"Fluttershy, carry me down," Twilight said, hopping onto her and she began to descend, carrying Twilight.
Pinkie slipped on her magical boot/sock/slippers and ran down the tunnel's walls.
"Rarity, if we can light the tunnel, maybe the archers can help," I told her.
We tried projecting light but the tunnel was too deep for us to our frustration; we could just listen to the chaos and shouting below.
"Dammit," one of the Unicorns said and I agreed. Having to listen to a fight you can't even SEE is very annoying.
And then I felt a pulse of magic and a letter appeared by Captain Keen Eyes. It had Rarity's cutie mark as a seal.
His eyes widened and warily he read it silently, then put it in his pack, now looking confused.
"What did it say, Father?" Rarity asked.
"She hoped to rescue me," he said softly. "And apologized that my captors drove them off before she could." He looked very confused.
"The clones have a somewhat warped view of the world and past events," I told him. "But it makes sense she thinks you are her father."
He stared at the ground, frowning and I remembered the vision I'd seen. My gut churned. Could he fight her, if it came down to it?
Rarity came over and nuzzled him. "I'm sure we can bring her around if we can only get the chance," she said.
The sounds of chaos were dying down.
Pretty soon they returned, battered but triumphant. "Well, we drove them off," Twilight said, then sighed. "But they collapsed the tunnel and got away."
"I couldn't dig fast enough," Clyde said, frustrated. "And my best digging tools were in my room because I didn't think I'd be digging tonight."
"The good news is that they took the jewels, so ideally, I can use my tracking spell and we can find their base," Twilight said.
*************
Ideal, except that it turned out Dawn Gleaming knew that trick and was able to ward off Twilight's efforts. Dammit.
On the other hand, we had been able to track that shapeshifted woman and she went back to the Bronze Shanti's base earlier in the day.
We decided to deliver our message to the Radirajah first; we have no legal authority here to break into the Bronze Shanti's base and it would be just my luck to capture the Elements of Power, but then get thrown in jail for it.
We HAD to get the message to him without more delays, given how many dopplegangers were around.
Though in my heart, I knew the meeting was somehow going to go totally to hell.
But we all got suited up and ready and set Applejack to maximum frou-frou mode. She and Rarity had been up very late, reviewing etiquette with the ambassador. To my surprise, Fluttershy was in human form again, looking very determined. By Fluttershy standards, anyway. She and Ivan were our only humans and I hoped no one would see them and cause a scene. Ivan was wearing a holy symbol of Asterius and had hidden his weapons in his clothing. I suddenly wondered if he was going to try to pass as a cleric.
Then we set out to be elegant, diplomatic, and sneaky.
*************
Rarity had made Clyde a nice suit and Blinky a nice dress for the meeting. We didn't want to leave them behind in case Pinkamena came for THEM. Clyde had been a little disappointed she hadn't tried to kidnap him.
We marched with our escorts through the streets and through the guards; being hailed by the door wardens and heralds was rather nice, really. Respect is a good thing.
I glanced at Fluttershy, worried she'd lose herself again. I wish I could help her. I'm fine with being in this form; I don't think it's affected my mind at all beyond the obvious stuff caused by the magic.
But how would I tell? On the other hand, no one is saying I'm acting weird.
I was going to nuzzle Rarity, my beautiful girlfriend, but then I decided the interests of dignity, unfortunately, would have to trump the interests of showing her how I feel. So I just whispered, "I love you," in her ear and watched her turn a little red and smile brightly.
"I love you too," she whispered and smiled at me. But again, dignity.
Damn you, dignity.
Much to Captain Keen Eyes frustration, most of his guards had to wait outside the palace. However, High Dive and an Earth Pony named Iron Smith had donned civilian clothing along with Captain Keen Eyes, hidden their weapons in saddlebags, and were pretending to be our servants, doing things like opening doors for us.
Clyde and Blinky both looked very nervous. Pinkie stuck close by them, whispering encouraging words. Fluttershy also spoke to them quietly, which seemed to help.
Ivan had the carefully neutral look of a man who wished he could light a match and watch this all burn but had to restrain himself. Patience, Ivan. One day, you'll be in place to start getting rid of the fire ants.
Besides, you KNOW a good con... diplomatic mission... requires subtlety and patience. Let's not have a repetition of what happened in Wendar.
At least everyone in Wendar is sure we're dead.
We encountered Corn Husker and his master; Corn Husker was hauling a small wagon piled with goods down a hallway as his master and his master's wife (I assume) walked ahead of him. Kal-iya Ajith and his wife turned and saw us and stared, then Kal-iya Ajith paled and bowed to Fluttershy.
She touched his forehead lightly. "Do good, not ill, and you will never taste my wrath again, Kal-iya Ajith. You were given this rank to help and protect others, not to abuse it. Show yourself worthy."
"Hey, Corn Husker, ho... Hello, good sir," Applejack said, correcting herself. "I hope you and your family are well."
"Thank you very much again," he said, sounding grateful. "We are quite well. Our daughter, Nimble Tongue, is at the Glantrian Embassy right now, starting her studies. I am very proud of her."
"Congratulations," I told her. "The study of wizardry is very rewarding. I had to teach myself from a book I bought." Stole, actually, but you can't say that when you're dignified.
"She's always loved to read, even though it was forbidden," Corn Husker said.
FORBIDDEN?
Twilight stared, mouth open wide.
Kal-iya Ajith's wife frowned. "It causes people to get ideas they shouldn't have."
"Dear, it is not wise to taunt the friends of a Ral-iya," Kal-iya Ajith said frantically.
Ivan made the gurgly noises of a man who wishes SO MUCH to unload verbal guns but can't.
Slither hissed at Kal-iya Ajith's wife, who said, "I know you're not really human," to Fluttershy.
"And I know your status was not earned by your karma in a past life, but merely was inherited by birth," Ivan said. "What does her body matter when she has spiritual power? Further, she is a druid. Her flesh is whatever is convenient to her."
Fluttershy licked her lips nervously, then reached into her pocket and pulled out a seed. She whispered to it and sang and it sprouted somehow into a daisy without having proper roots or a bush or... I can't remember how daisies grow at all, really. She then offered it to Kal-iya's Ajith's wife. "I can tell you love your husband very much and you just wish to defend his honor. That is commendable," she said softly.
Kal-iya Ajith's wife looked confused, but took the flower, staring at it as if it might bite her.
"Forbidden?" Twilight finally squeaked.
"But she can do what she likes there. One day, she says she will take us to Glantri, where things are different. It is hard to imagine," Corn Husker said with a certain awe. "The Immortals have smiled on us."
"Glantri has its flaws too," Ivan said to him. "But I think you'll be happier there."
"Glantrian wizards abuse their power," Kal-iya Ajith's wife said bitterly.
"Enough," Kal-iya Ajith said. "Wear the flower, dear."
"But..."
"Wear it," he said more firmly and she tucked it into her hair frowning.
He bowed to Fluttershy. "Good luck with whatever brings you here, enlightened one. Corn Husker, we must go. We must see the Minister of Trade."
"Good luck," I said, trying to be diplomatic. "Immortals shine their blessing on you." It's important in diplomacy to wish everyone well until it's time to slide in the knife.
They soon moved on and so did we.
************
We were escorted to a room, where we waited two hours, then got moved to another for thirty minutes, then BACK to the first for an hour, then we had lunch in ANOTHER room, then we were taken to the gardens and musicians entertained us. Applejack was starting to look somewhat overwhelmed by maintaining decorum. Rarity, on the other hand, enjoyed the various entertainments. Clyde and Blinky, oddly, took it best, eating what was given to them, listening to music or watching juggling, as if this happened every day. Compared to earlier nerves, it confused me.
It began to rain hard, pounding down, so they took us inside to another room as the rain hit like an ocean falling from the sky.
As we were watching a group of very skilled acrobats, Fluttershy began talking quietly to Spike, who looked intrigued. Meanwhile, Twilight now began scribbling on a piece of paper; it seemed to be a crude map of the palace. I looked at it. "What's that for?"
"I am suddenly wondering if someone in the Radhirajah's staff has either been charmed or bribed or replaced by someone working for our enemies and is trying to shuffle us around so we never see the Radhirajah," Twilight said.
"I'll find him," Ivan said, then faked having to go to the bathroom; he got directions and slipped off.
Pinkie began humming the pocket pony song, which was now much longer and more elaborate.
Blinky closed her eyes and seemed to focus on something. What, she didn't say.
Could the shifters be planning a strike? Or do they hope we'll freak out and get thrown out? Ooh, I... okay, I don't actually LIKE that plan but I appreciate the cunning, especially with Applejack getting ever more uncomfortable.
Captain Keen Eyes refilled my glass. His voice oozed politeness. "Some wine for the noble Count Five Jacks High." His eyes said 'choke on it'.
I smiled back. "Thank you, good sir." My eyes said, 'You can't stop me, ha ha'.
Thus the cycle of hate was preserved.
Soon, Ivan returned. "No one on our shifter list is involved, BUT I convinced a servant to talk and he has heard the Radhirajah is annoyed because of the various incidents with our people, and is snubbing us in response. He'll talk to us eventually, but this is a kind of 'know your place' snub."
Delightful.
**********
We got shuffled more. We had dinner. Applejack had glazed over and turned into a stiff, formal zombie who Rarity had to carefully guide around. We were all getting jumpy and nervous with tension. Blinky kept napping wherever we went. Or maybe she was just concentrating on something.
I finally asked her.
"Keeping an eye out for purple worms. Just in case they try that again," she said.
"I fully support what you're doing." Ahahah. Fixing the embassy is going to take forever. Fortunately, it only damaged one building and dug a huge tunnel.
We got moved to ANOTHER room and this time I smelled a smell that gave me intense paranoia. Everyone else was sniffing the air and looking a little worried.
"What is that?" I said.
"I don't know," Applejack said, frowning and snapping out of her funk. Then she sighed. "A refined young lady such as myself does not cavort with creatures which smell like this."
I smiled. "And a fine refined young lady you are, fair Countess Applejack."
Rarity took a deep breath. "It's mixed with perfume. They tried to hide their scent with a kind of lemon-scented oil. But it wasn't enough to fool us."
"I can't smell it," Ivan said. "I only pick up the hint of lemon."
Twilight cast a quick spell to reveal anything invisible but there was nothing invisible. A Sindhi bard sat on cushions, played a sitar and related a heroic tale about an earlier Radhirajah who battled a great evil dragon and slew it. It was a pretty good story but even Rarity was starting to go a little stir crazy by now.
And then another servant entered. Lemon-scented. With just a hint of the other smell. Carefully, we followed him, knowing this might be a trap.
The next room had a group of trained roosters, who began performing the Equestrian National Anthem as two tamers, both not shifters, urged them on. I started laughing; the soldiers and Keen Eyes glared at me but Dash joined in and then Pinkie and soon everyone else, even Keen Eyes was laughing.
Shifter boy stood by the door.
Suddenly, I realized Ivan was not here. I hoped that boded well, not ill.
Then Ivan returned, shoving his way in. "The Radhirajah is meeting with 'us'. Which means it has to be the Elements of Power impersonating us."
FUCK ME RAW.
"To the rescue!" Twilight shouted, and then the shifter in the doorway turned into a huge ten foot tall green humanoid with elven style ears and that damn elven smirk but with the claws of a troll and the fashion sense of a murder hobo.
DOPPLEGANGER-ELF-TROLL!!!!!!!
"You BASTARD! You all fell into the Elemental Plane of FIRE, DAMMIT!"
He was about to give his evil speech but now he said, "What the..." His eyes narrowed. "YOU BASTARD! Cufen the Magnificent, we have sworn to DESTROY YOU ABOVE ALL THINGS!!!! Princess Marjorie promised us our revenge but we never dreamed you would throw yourself INTO OUR CLAWS!"
"Well, you were certain humble in that life," Clyde observed, amused.
"In your dreams," Rarity said and fired an arrow right into his arm. He bled a little but the wound closed itself with the arrow in it. "Twilight, you said that rune would make shapeshifters revert to normal!"
"This IS normal for a doppleganger-elf-troll!" I said. "SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!" And then I hurled fire at him; he dodged and a tapestry caught fire. Ivan drew his sword and clipped him and he took a Pinkie-Pie to the face as he stumbled into the hallway but he shouted, "The light purple pony is CUFEN THE MAGNIFICENT REBORN!"
What irks me most? Only these damn things ever actually used my title from that life! And the town that awarded it to me, but knowing my life, I wasn't able to stay in Tameronikas for very long.
This is probably why Tameronikas is still standing.
And now distantly, a voice shouted with magic-amplification, "The Equestrians have kidnapped the Radhirajah and are trying to escape! STOP THEM!"
BLOODY HELL!!!!!
Applejack leaped at the doppleganger-elf-troll, knocked him down, then casually punted him off down the hallway. Rarity retrieved her arrow, looking annoyed. Then we began rushing towards where Ivan said our evil twins were. Unfortunately, we now encountered a group of guards. "Halt!" they said.
This posed a difficult problem. If we halted, it's likely our foes would escape. But if we attacked them, the odds of this ending well would plummet.
"Ivan," Twilight said and he came over to her. She looked into his eyes, and then BAMF, we all teleported. Twilight was panting hard now and then Ivan had to catch her. But we landed where the Radhirajah had been.
HAD been.
Now there was a distant brawl and the sound of a shouting. We ran towards it. More guards and Twilight was basically too tired to teleport us again. We dodged around them, trying to follow the sounds, but we kept having to evade guards and ending more lost and further away.
"Roof," Twilight mumbled. "Easiest escape is to have something to fly away on. We need to go up." Clyde was carrying her; he was strong and she was, as ponies go, light. IE, heavier than me.
We made for a staircase and ran for the roof. Unfortunately, it didn't actually GO to the roof.
"TIME TO MAKE A HOLE!" Dash shouted and smashed the roof open. This was enough for Clyde, High Dive, Dash, and Fluttershy to fly up. Fluttershy began using Slither like a fishing pole to reel people up while the others hauled folk with ropes.
The good news was we made it onto the roof before our evil twins escaped.
The bad news was that they had a Glantri-style flying ship STAFFED BY DOPPLEGANGER-ELF-TROLLS. WHERE DID THEY GET SO MANY OF THE DAMN THINGS?
And they had SIX of them on the roof with them. Dawn Gleaming concentrated and the Radhirajah flew up onto the ship with her telekinetic powers. AND they had Pinkamena's shadow friend squad, including Sir Lintsalot, who they must have recovered from... wherever he went when we conned him.
Then there was a distant explosion and I felt a wash of magic.
"There went the teleport wards," Twilight mumbled.
"Wait, they didn't stop you teleporting inside the castle," I said.
"I was too strong for them but now I'm pretty wiped out." She touched her crown, the Element of Magic. Oh hoh.
Dragonshy said, "Now you all... Fluttershy, what are you DOING?" she said, staring at Fluttershy.
Fluttershy blinked as she petted Slither's head. "Just rewarding him for being such a good, good boy. He was so helpful!" She smiled. "I'm going to give you some tasty mice later, yes, I will."
Dragonshy said, "But you... I mean... Ahahaha." She looked stunned.
"Do NOT tell me you are afraid of snakes," Rainbow Crash said to Dragonshy, half mocking and half stunned.
Ivan said, "You're a pony, you wouldn't get it."
"SHE is a pony too!" Rainbow Crash said, pointing at Dragonfly.
I studied Fluttershy. Is she... probably she is losing it. Dammit. I think she may be vamping but it's hard to tell for some reason. But I don't think she's doing it deliberately.
"Hand over the Radhirajah now! Do you realize what you're doing?" Captain Keen Eyes demanded. "This could start a war!"
"It will start a war and Sind will lose. Its filthy oppressive system of government will fall and Ponies will no longer be oppressed here. Isn't that what you want?" Niccolo said back.
Ivan grimaced. He opened his mouth, shut it, then stared at the roof, clearly now feeling instinctively that this isn't the way to do it, but unable to argue with that goal.
"Marjorie wants her own kingdom," I said. "Not to free it but to rule it. If you erect freedom for Ponies on a stack of corpses, won't it just mean that one day the humans will rise up and take revenge? That's not how Equestria became freer than it was under noble rule. You've read history, Dawn Gleaming," I said. "Tell me how Equestria became how it is today."
She gulped, then grew more confident. "As Equestria's neighbors entered periods of weakness and peace with the Buffalo came to pass, the military class became less necessary. Gradually, merchants and craftsmen, rather than farmers who were peasants controlled by knightly war-ponies, became the main generators of wealth. Wealth is a form of power," she continued, and Apple Blossom nodded.
"My kind of people became the true rulers of Equestria. Cultured, literate, hard-working, and wealthy. Celestia recovered from her illness and allied herself to our people and gradually we eased the nobility into their current status as singing canaries for the glory of the court," Apple Blossom said. "Clarity and I represent the true nobility of Equestria now."
"Exactly, darling," Clarity said. "Father, you should come with us. I don't want to fight you and there is much good you could do with us. This land will need strong, honest men like you as we begin to make it a fit place for Pony and beast alike." She paused, then looking a little embarrassed, she said, "I have missed you, Father."
I could see the vision burning in my eyes like a brand. Saw him put in the position of fighting his daughter. For all that I hate him, my heart suddenly went out to him. DAMN YOU, HEART. How could a man have to fight his own child?
We'd told him about Clarity but only now did it really sink in, as Spikey stood by her, one hand on her back, and Spike carefully didn't look at them.
He licked his lips and then he said, "You should join us. You know your mother misses you. You can come back to Equestria and see her. And Sweetie misses her sister so very much." His voice was rough and wobbled. He's not a practiced liar. He's a very honest man.
An honest asshole, but an honest man.
It would be easier to hate him without remorse if he would stop having some good qualities, DAMMIT.
Rarity made a noise, and I touched her mind with a spell. 'We should play along. He's taking the right approach.'
'I know. It's just my nerves, darling.' She pressed to me and we stood close, keeping our mouths shut.
Slowly, though, the boat was moving away. Leaving them behind? Why?
Clyde started, then turned to Pinkamena, staring at her. She glared back at him.
"Go ahead, condemn me. You always do. You always did. You had to have it your way or the highway, so I chose the highway and you hate me for it. But I don't need you. I'm old enough to make my own choices." She sounded very angry. "Hello, Blinky. I see you're going to inherit the farm now that you've let Father grind and polish you down to the shape and size he wants, everything extraneous rubbed away by water and words."
"So, Dawn Gleaming. You think you can rush that here? Sind is still ruled by nobles who lord it over peasants, though the merchants and craftsmen are waxing in strength. Does your study really show that Sind is ready for this sort of revolution to actually work? To actually last? Or is it more likely to lead to the warriors resuming control and cracking down on those you sought to free?" I said.
"I..." She hesitated. "But I can't just do nothing! It's better to take a chance on failure than to do nothing and guarantee it!"
Aaargh, I'm not so good at this kind of big social question. "I think the Sindhi have to make this revolution for themselves for it to work," I told her. But that's easy for me to say; I don't have to live with the system as it is.
Dammit, this country probably should be overthrown but Marjorie is an evil bastard and can't be trusted with it and if we don't stop them, she'll attack Equestria and even if Equestria wins, a lot of people will die.
And most people don't get to reincarnate like me.
Dammit.
While we launched into a four way debate between myself, Twilight, Dawn Gleaming, and Sammy (who I will note, does not look as good as a pony as I do), Clarity wobbled for a moment. "Father, I can't go back until these evil twins are dealt with. Please, join us." Her voice was urgent.
"Clarity and I need your help," Spikey said urgently. "Don't let these fakes fool you. Don't you want to get rid of that punk, Five Jacks High?"
Captain Keen Eyes glanced at me and grimaced.
Bloody hell. Damn you, Spikey.
"I lur... I lar..." Clyde coughed and spat out his hay. "I love you and I'm sorry," he said, sounding pained to say it. "I never told you that enough. I was so worried you all would have my bad habits from my youth that I crushed you all trying to restrain you and didn't do a good job of showing you the light I'd found. But I just buried you with it, instead."
"We love you, please come home," Pinkie said, holding out a hoof to Pinkamena.
Pinkamena's eyes widened, clearly not expecting this. The flaw of having totally false memories.
"I... Father..." she squeaked.
"He's probably just trying to trick you like that bastard tricked me," Sir Lintsalot said urgently.
"You know how he always treated you, as just a slave to work all day," Madame LeFlour said. "Never a moment of fun."
"And he'd get mad and yell at you if you did anything wild at all," Rocky said. "Anything not covered in the book of Kagyar."
"And the food was terribly bland. Even the food didn't get to be exciting!" Mr. Turnip said.
"I know, we overdid it," Clyde said. "But I'm sorry." He kept his hoof extended and Pinkamena stared at it uncertainly.
Apple Blossom and Applejack stared at each other, and Apple Blossom grinned. "So you have to be me to beat me, dearie? Shows which one of us is the original."
"Even being elegant means you're copying my grace and dignity," Applejack said calmly. "There's only one way to settle this, you know."
"I know," Apple Blossom said. "Tea Party of death. Anton!"
One of the doppleganger-elf-trolls began setting up a table, putting out tea and tea gear and laying out snacks.
"..." I stared for a moment.
"Given a free choice, I would fling him into the sun. But I lost that choice when I swore allegiance to Celestia," Captain Keen Eyes said firmly. "She has ordered me to protect him and I will die for his worthless hide if I must, though I would rather not." He licked his lips. "I will fight you if I must, but I would rather not. Come Clarity, join us, and we will let bygones be bygones, daughter." His voice was soft but firm.
"First event," Anton said. "Tea pouring."
Applejack and Apple Blossom spun delicately, each took a pot with their tail and carefully poured out tea. I could see Rarity concentrating, probably giving advice by magic to Applejack. Apple Blossom's tea sloshed slightly but she gently tapped the cup and it stabilized.
Pinkamena and Clarity both wobbled, clearly torn.
Applejack and Apple Blossom now each carefully took the glass with two hooves. Slowly, every so slowly, they lifted it to their lips and took a sip, just a small one. Applejack's tongue started to come out to lick her lips dry but she made herself stop. Apple Blossom smiled. "That would have been quite gauche. But flawed instincts will tell."
"I'll sho... I will show you whose instincts are best," Applejack said. She and Apple Blossom each took a small cake, balanced it on one hoof and took a bite. While Apple Blossom had better fine control on keeping her cake stable, the rest of her body wobbled a bit. Applejack balanced flawlessly on three legs but wobbled a touch with the cake.
"So, you going to try to tempt me to switch sides?" Rainbow Crash said to Rainbow Dash.
"Naah, I know me. You'll only learn to stop being a punk when I KICK YOUR ASS," Rainbow Dash said. "I'm just waiting for the full brawl to start."
"HAH! We'll see!" Rainbow Crash said.
"We can't fight until I win this argument!" Dawn Gleaming said.
"Given you just tried to cite an imaginary book, that could be a long time," Twilight said weakly.
"The Hiearcopolis scroll is AUTHENTIC," Dawn Gleaming insisted. "It records the first labor strike for which we have a record, after Blackmoor!"
"It was made up in Corunglain in 783 AC in order to justify a labor strike by morticians," Twilight said.
"Well, that's the argument in Decius Mobalus' history of Corunglain," I said.
"Mobalus was the little bitch of Corun House, who told him what to write. It was a strike against their rivals, Toney House, who they wanted to make look bad," Sammy insisted.
"You should not refer to a historian as a 'little bitch," Twilight said weakly.
And then Fire Swallow and Cruisin' came up over the edge of the roof. FUCK. "They're almost here. Time to GO," Fire Swallow said.
"But I haven't won yet!" Dawn Gleaming said. "We haven't even pinned down what the acceptable standards for sources are!"
"Father, come with us, please," Clarity said, starting to cry.
As you'd expect, now Captain Keen Eyes looked intensely uncomfortable. "I know you're just crying to try and get me to give in to what you want."
"I didn't do that all the time," Rarity mumbled.
"Is it working?" Clarity said hopefully.
"If they see both groups, they will know the TRUTH," Fire Swallow said urgently.
"This is NOT a concession, it's just a rescheduling! We'll finish this later!" Dawn Gleaming said, frustrating. "I am NOT running away because I would lose this argument! Not at all!"
"It's because Twilight is smarter than you," I said, grinning a little.
"NO!"
Applejack and Apple Blossom were now taking another cup of tea; they both set it down, grinning at each other. "I fear, dear friend, that our fine tea party is about to be cut short," Applejack said.
"I must regretfully depart," Apple Blossom said. "But I am sure we will meet again in the Broken Lands or elsewhere. Farewell, old chum."
"Isn't that what sharks eat?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Yeah, makes a great put down!" Crash said enthusiastically.
Not actually the point.
"Come on, Pinkamena, it's not too late," Pinkie said urgently. "Father and Blinky and I all want you to come with us."
"If you really wanted me, Mother would be here too. She never liked how I looked and always thought Father cheated on her somehow to make me," Pinkamena said.
"Honey, that's impossible, given she gave birth to you," Clyde said.
Pinkamena, for a moment, paused with mouth open wide. "I... How did I... yes, it makes no sense, but..." She suddenly looked utterly panicked.
"You tricked her!" Sir Lintsalot said angrily. "Liars!"
And then there was a flash and Dawn Gleaming teleported them. Unfortunately, our Twilight was too exhausted to stop them.
The ship rose into the clouds even as our pegasi launched towards it.
"So close, DAMMIT," Captain Keen Eyes said angrily.
"Pinkamena," Clyde said sadly. "Blinky, how long do we have?"
"About two seconds," Blinky said, and then the first wave of guards broke onto the roof.
"Surrender!" they shouted.
"No... no... Celestia is going to banish me to the Moon..." Twilight wailed, utterly depressed.
Rarity licked her lips. "Pegasi, return!" she shouted. "Break for the hole and jump down!"
She took command as we all retreated, jumping down through the hole; Ivan was carried down by Fluttershy. Then we ran through the palace but ever more guards wer closing in on us. Blinky whispered to Clyde, who nodded.
"We need to get to the basement," Clyde said.
"Why?" I asked.
"We can get us out of here if we can get down to good solid rock," he said.
"This way!" Rarity shouted and we followed her lead as Twilight continued to wail in despair.
***************
She didn't actually know which way we were going, it turned out. We finally were brought to bay in a large dining room, which we barred the door and tried to think of a plan. Busting the floor revealed... troops under us. Someone thought of that. Dammit, the noose was tightening.
"I guess we fight," I said.
And then a door we hadn't seen before opened. What came in was a stallion in dark blue robes with the moon on them in white. He looked like a male version of Luna and he had a necklace around his neck of Luna's cutie mark. Given he ALSO had the same cutie mark, this looked odd. "I am the Prophet of Luna," he announced. "Come to bring freedom to this land. Follow me, servants of the holy Luna. I will lead you to freedom."
"It won't matter if they capture us, Celestia will send the whole prison to the moon," Twilight wailed.
This is not a good time for her to have a breakdown.
"We need to get to the basement," Rarity said.
I hope she's right to trust Clyde. Though with that cutie mark, I expect he can dig pretty fast.
"You know, Luna..." Ivan began.
"We know Luna has blessed you, human," he said. "And I know of your kindness to our kind. Remember us when you walk among the stars."
Ivan started, then looked guilty.
We followed him; I hoped it was not a mistake. The passage was narrow and forked many times. "What is this?" I asked.
"For servants to travel without being seen. Especially lowly ponies, who might 'taint' high caste folk by their presence," he said bitterly. "This land groans with long sorrows."
We reached an intersection and another identical pony waited there. "I am the Prophet of Luna," the second one said. "I will guide you."
"I will fade our passage," the first one said. "Then return home. Luna's blessing on you."
They even smelled the same.
"Are you all priests, I take it?" I said.
"We are many fingers of one hand," he said. "United by our common purpose. We will shield you, for Luna's sake."
"We have to go to the basement," Rarity said.
Luna's second prophet hesistated. "But if they figure it out, you will be trapped."
"I have a few tricks of my own," Clyde said.
"Then let us go swiftly."
****************
Something about this pony... We followed him down to the basement, which was full of stores. And a few servant ponies, who bowed to the Prophet. "They will go and tell everyone they saw you heading for the Radhirajah's boat," the Prophet said. "I must go before I am missed."
"The Radhirajah really has been skimping on counter-intelligence work," Captain Keen Eyes said, shaking his head.
"No one pays attention to lowly ponies or considers them worth spying on," the Prophet said. "And we take a great risk for you that some of our brethren will be exposed."
"Thank you," Clyde said. "You're good people. Go before they find you with us."
The prophet left and he and Blinky kicked one of the walls in a complex pattern.
A few seconds of nothing ensued.
And then two huge weird ghostly creatures came through the wall. One was blue and one was orange. They were shaped roughly like a hemisphere connected to a tube with a cartoony face painted on one side. Then they somehow pulled off... They turned into two ponies, each holding a full head mask like the shape they'd had a moment ago; one was an older mare with her hair in a bun and fake elf ears and wearing an elven outfit adapted for ponies in orange and blue; the other was a younger mare, also in an elven style outfit in blue and gold. She was wearing fake elf ears and a hat like mine. Her mane had been very obviously dyed green.
"Mother?" Pinkie squeaked.
She had a wry smile. "Hello, dear. Inky and I have come to save you."
"I am Arwen Moonshadow now!" Inky insisted.
"Of course you are, dear," Mrs. Pie said. She and Clyde nuzzled each other. "We'd best start funneling people. Masks on, everyone."
Blinky and Clyde turned out to have hidden masks which also let them do... whatever exactly those things did. Let them phase, I think. They took us through the wall into a tunnel, taking each of us one at a time.
"I fear we will soon have to go into the nasty sewer," Bonnie Pie (I think that's her name) said.
"It's the GHOSTLY GANG," Twilight suddenly said. "I thought they all got eaten by a dragon twenty five years ago!"
"It's what we wanted everyone to think," Clyde Pie said.
"And the Older Gang's running around here too," Spike said. "Wow. It's old crime week here in Sind."
My brain put the pieces together. Those two robbed the Thyatians and left the necklace to throw off suspicion. VERY clever.
Not clever enough to fool me, though.
HAH!
"Anyway, ho..." Bonnie paused.
She stared at her husband.
Her eyes widened.
So did Inky's.
"What?" Bonnie said, mouth open wide.
"Umm... Twilight... ahahaha." He laughed nervously, one hoof behind his head.
"Man, that looks just like you," Ivan whispered to me, then laughed.
Ahahaha.
"Honey..." Bonnie said warningly.
"It's my fault," Twilight mumbled. "I'm sorry. I can't do anything right."
"No, it's okay," Clyde said to her, then turned back to his wife. "I still love you as much as ever. I'm not going to fly away and leave you behind like Five Stars did." He nuzzled her gently. "We'll fly into the future together."
He glanced at Dash, who gave him the hoofs up.
"Honey, you ALWAYS get us in over our head," Bonnie said, shaking her head.
"I rely on you to get us out. And you'd be bored if I didn't," he said to her.
Bonnie laughed ruefully. "We couldn't even manage to stay boring."
"WHAT IS GOING ON?" Pinkie said, flailing.
"We'll explain everything later," Clyde said. "We have to go."
We ran through the tunnels. "We have to get back to the embassy," Rarity said.
"Conveniently, there's now a 'secret tunnel' into it," Clyde said, laughing.
Ahahaha.
Fluttershy now spread some seeds as she flew and sang, tangling up the path behind us with vines and brambles as we ran. "This will stop any pursuit."
Baron Golden Star is going to kill us.
So dead.
Maybe Celestia WILL banish us to the moon.
*******************
"We get you out of the country," Baron Golden Star said. "If we hurry, we can get you on the train which is about to leave."
"Too obvious," Clyde said. "And puts the other passengers in danger," he continued.
Baron Golden Star grimaced. "It wouldn't have come to this if you hadn't annoyed the Radhirajah enough to make him make you wait."
Captain Keen Eyes grimaced and we all mumbled apologetically. DAMMIT.
A letter now appeared, landing on Twilight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
My dear little ponies and humans,
Spike has sent me a letter informing me of your plight. Baron Golden Star, I need you to tell them the truth. They won't believe it but with the Radhirajah gone, the government will be paralyzed at least for a little while. I need you to buy as much time as you can. I put my trust in you, Baron Golden Star. Do your very best and I will be satisfied. Every moment you can buy us is a moment more for the Elements to recover the Radhirajah and prevent open war.
Twilight, I know you feel guilty. We can discuss this later, but I need you to pull yourself together and study hard and plan how to rescue the Radhirajah. I need you, Twilight. And I trust in you. Everyone makes mistakes. But it's not too late to fix this one.
Everyone, you should escape through the south gate and head south into the desert down the road. I will arrange for you to be picked up there.
Luna will have further instructions for you soon. Be swift and fierce and wise, my friends. Do not look to the past or chew the cud of your regrets. What is done is done. Look to the future and we will make it shine together.
I still put my trust in you all.
Your Princess, Friend, and Mentor,
Princess Celestia of Equestria.
PS: Buy Spike some ice cream when you get the chance. He deserves it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Celestia, I'm sorry," Twilight said, shivering, then tried to pull herself together. "Baron, do you have any ice cream for Spike?"
"We don't have..." He looked at the letter again. "I'll send a servant."
Twilight closed her eyes and shook for a few seconds, then got up. Her eyes opened and she looked weak but determined. "Okay. Grab anything you left here at the embassy. We ship out in ten minutes. Spike, eat quickly."
"I'm good at that!" Spike said excitedly and ran for the kitchens.
Ahh, feels like old days.
THE TIMES I RAN FOR MY LIFE WITH EVERYTHING ON FIRE.
Except now I have someone to run for my life with.
I took a moment to nuzzle Rarity as we grabbed things in our room and she now kissed me. "Nice job taking charge and leading us," I told her.
"Well, I knew Twilight would snap out of it after a while but someone had to take charge," she said.
"You did well, daughter. I'm proud of you," Captain Keen Eyes said to Rarity.
"Shouldn't you be packing?" I told him.
"I kept everything in my saddlebags in case something like this happened," he said.
Ahaha.
"Thank you, Father. I just wish Clarity had listened to you."
"If I had a little more time..." He sighed. "No regrets. Celestia is right. We have to move forwards. See you all in five." He galloped off, shouting orders to his men.
She licked her lips nervously. "I guess..." She stopped.
"Guess?" I asked.
"I've kind of enjoyed having you as a pony all this time but no reason to stay this way now," she said. "I'll owe you a good long run." She sighed. "It would have been nicer without Father hanging over us the whole time, though."
"We'll have plenty of time in the future," I told her.
If we're alive.
"Anyway, I'm staying this way until I'm sure I won't need to run," I told her.
Then I can have my freakout in safety.
*************
Stage one of the plan was simple. We quickly bought wagons and hitched our earth ponies to them, then put everyone else in the wagons and then the earth ponies put hoof to cobblestone, hauling us through the city at high speed as alarms sounded and watchmen began heading our way. We soon had a mob of soldiers chasing us as we headed for the south gate.
Fluttershy, still in human form, now rose up, even as the soldiers frantically closed the gate. She chanted and lightning stabbed down from the clouds above the city as rain poured down. Strike after strike battered the gates and then the pegasi formed into a v formation and charged it, smashing it apart as the unicorns worked to divert incoming arrow fire. We rushed out the gates and away down the road at high speed.
Ivan was laughing. "Remember Oceansend?"
"I wish I could forget," I told him, but I was laughing too, mane flapping in the wind. There's something about running from the law which is just exhilarating.
A catapult was about to fire at us and Rarity fired an arrow; it exploded, blowing up the catapult and I high-hooved her and we both laughed. More arrows disabled the rest of the gate artillery as Keen Eyes men proved their worth.
A squad of cavalry tried to block us and Keen Eyes reared up. Arrows FLOODED out of his packs and fell like rain from the sky, scattering the cavalry, then came back to him and stashed themselves.
Holy shit.
He grinned at me and I resolved never to piss him off.
Umm...
Never to... ummm...
AHAHAHAHA.
"I normally don't do that because if they actually hit anything, I'm out of arrows," he said. "But it has its uses."
Like making ME a pincushion. Ahaha.
Faster, Earth Ponies, FASTER!
He wobbled a bit; I suspect it takes a lot out of him too.
Hippogriffs with riders came after us now, but the pegasi took to the air, battling them. Pretty soon, the formation was scattered and they rejoined us.
And we roared off down the road in our wagons.
**************
Our foes gave chase, but regular horses can't keep up with Earth Ponies. Suckers.
We soon were deep into the desert and night was upon us; the storm was dumping down rain and heat rose up from the rocky terrain, creating a kind of steam bath. It made me feel annoyingly filthy.
And then something loomed down out of the clouds. A flying tree. A huge tree and around it was a veritable fortress of interlinked buildings connected by ramps and elevators. It was a liftwood tree, in fact, stuck in a giant pot. And from the top two flags flew. One of them was the skull and crossbones of pirates. And the other was flag of... Ierendi? What on earth was this and why were Ierendi pirates flying around in it?
A letter dropped onto Twilight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Har, Maties!,
This do be the Dread Pirate Lunette. Are ye ready to be brought aboard this fine vessel?
Your friend,
The Dread Pirate Lunette.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"The... OH," Twilight said. "I wonder who built this."
"Oh, I think I know," Applejack said proudly.
"Umm, how do we get up there?" Fluttershy said hesitantly.
I blinked and touched her wings.
"OH."
Having an entire lance of pegasi meant we all got swiftly ferried up to the vessel, and soon joined the Dread Pirate Lunette and her crew.
The Dread Pirate Lunette was Luna in her Belcadizian elf form. It also included the Cutie Mark Crusaders (in pirate outfits), Lyra, Bon-Bon, and Ditzy. And a bunch of Equestrian soldiers now in pirate outfits.
Scootaloo was, in fact, driving the craft / tree, which had huge sails to catch the wind. And with pegasi onboard, they had whatever winds they needed. Scootaloo wore a black hat and a black jacket and black pants and had a parrot on her shoulder.
"And look!" Apple Bloom said proudly, pointing to her flank. A hammer stood next to a treehouse in an apple tree; the shield of the Cutie Mark Crusaders hung on the treehouse. "Now we just have to get Scootaloo hers! I bet when we have our first aerial battle, she'll get it!" She wore a black buccaneer's hat and a blue miliary jacket with gold trim.
"I'd better!" Scootaloo said.
"Nice job," Applejack said to Apple Bloom. "Granny and Big Mac will be proud of you. Then they'll kill me for letting you into this situation."
Lunette hugged Ivan then came round and hugged everyone. "Twilight, we will need to develop a plan before we reach Marjorie's base. We have to rescue the Radhirajah as fast as we can."
"If we hurry, we may be able to intercept them before they get to her base," Twilight said.
"Aye, Aye, Captain Twilight," Scootaloo said, saluting.
Sweetie now ran up to her father and embraced him. She wore a striped white and blue shirt and had a bandana around her hair. She also had an eyepatch on and a fake wooden leg. "Har!" she said and her father laughed and nuzzled her.
She then ran over to Rarity and I and we snuggled up to her. "What a fearsome pirate you are," I said, grinning.
"Nothing can stop me now!" Apple Bloom said excitedly, tail waggling.
A dangerous sentiment.
We now got stowed away in our quarters. Apple Bloom gleefully pointed out all the traps in the place, intended to deter boarders. Snares, counterweights to fling you off the tree, pit traps (especially bad given how high this thing flies), crashing walls, falling ceilings, the works.
If this stuff goes off in the middle of the night, I will be PISSED.
"Did you really have to make this place so deadly?" Rarity said just a little nervously.
"Well, originally I was planning for a smaller crew. But Uncle K had some suggestions and then things kind of got out of hand," Apple Bloom said.
Ahhaha. Yes.
I heard Fluttershy shriek distantly. Back to normal. Which means... eeee.
And then I realized... I can't actually turn back because Celestia did this. Maybe Twilight could dispel it. But... dammit.
I need HANDS.
Oh, LUNA.
I rounded up Luna once our stuff was stowed. Well, 'Lunette'. We went back to my room and I got Rarity to grapple me, just in case I freak out. "Change me as well," Rarity said to Lunette. "Marcus was kind enough to give me a week; I will give him one now."
She nodded and changed us, while Sweetie watched curiously.
I felt utterly disoriented. I couldn't smell anyone any more. I felt weirdly isolated and I couldn't hear as well and my field of vision had changed and everything looked subtly different somehow.
I panicked and would have run but Rarity held me until my nerves unjangled and Lunette held my hand and Sweetie took my other one with her hooves.
"I love you," Rarity said softly.
I mumbled incoherently, fighting panic. Stupid fear.
"Don't be afraid," Sweetie said. "You're safe here, since Scootaloo isn't allowed to touch the trap controls any more."
Ahahaha.
I AM INSIDE A GIANT FLYING DEATH TRAP DESIGNED BY A CHILD!!!!!!
Rarity's grip tightened and I felt her body pressed against mine and now I thought about how I had thought and... and she... eeeeeeeee.
Scootaloo is piloting this. Ahahaha.
BREATHE.
Rarity licked my neck and my eyes widened and I jumped, then said, "That feels very good," tightly. I had been so... It had excited and scared me at once.
Is it going to be like this every time?
"You will get used to it, but it takes time," Lunette said.
Once again, I cannot keep my own thoughts in my own damn head.
"It's not so bad for me," Rarity said, frowning.
"You haven't just spent a week as a human and then changed back to normal. And you're not as jumpy as Marcus," Lunette said.
She let go of my hand. "Anyway, I'm sure you two will want some privacy," Lunette said. "Come on, Sweetie, let's go make sure everyone is okay."
"But..."
"You can catch up with them a little later," Lunette said, hustling her out.
Thanks, Luna.
***************
"This must be hard on you," I said to her as we sat next to each other on the bed in our cabin, holding hands.
"I miss smelling everyone," she said softly. "How can humans stand to feel so isolated?"
"You get used to it. But now I'm kind of keenly aware of it," I said, raising her hand and kissing the back of it. "Was I tasty?"
She laughed. "Yes," she said softly. "Not in an eatable way but I enjoyed it and I could tell you did."
"You made a good leader," I told her.
"Thank you, darling. I should go see Twilight later, see how she's doing." She sounded worried.
"I think Sweetie wants some of my time later, so you can see how she's doing then," I told her. "While I herd Sweetie."
"I wish we'd gotten to have a proper audience," Rarity said. She sighed. "A chance to show off my wares and my skills, lost."
"I know," I told her. I turned her and kissed her softly, embracing her.
At least this corner of my life is going well, even if the mission fell off a cliff. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book 6: Ponies Against Deviltry | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Book 6: Ponies Against Deviltry
By John Biles
***************
PINKIE-VISION, SO PINK:
Oh my Celestia, I can't believe it. I ran around my family in a circle, unable to stop shouting "Oh my Celestia" over and over, until Blinky tripped me and I somehow ended up face down in a pie.
So I ate it, of course.
"Dear, you're getting all worked up beyond what it's worth. The way you'd get obsessed with lining up the rocks JUST right and then you'd collapse from exhaustion before you finished," Mom said. She helped me up. "Also, your table manners are still terrible."
"None of you have the proper refinement that I do as an elf," Inky said a little haughtily.
So I hugged her and rubbed bits of pie on her face to get clean. "Now we're even!" I said.
She stared, mouth wide open.
"What is going ON?" I said. "Since when did you all go have ADVENTURES?" And why wasn't I invited?
"We're retired, dear," Mom said, settling down on her haunches. "Everyone, sit."
We sat in a circle, just like the old days, except this time Mom wasn't preaching. And Inky didn't used to have elf ears and green and black clothing. And Blinky... is somehow much older than she used to be.
I don't know how that happened.
AND DAD IS A PEGASUS!
I wouldn't mind being able to fly but I might not be so good at parties and that would be TERRIBLE, though I could totally throw a FLYING party and oooh... we could go really high, when Dash gets married and then we'd all parachute down and have the wedding as we all drift gently to the ground!
I began frantically scribbling notes, pen in mouth.
"... And that's how I created Equestria with my strong right hoof," Mom finished.
"Very interesting," I said as I scribbled frantically. I wish I was a better artist, but I had to label Twilight as Twilight or else you might think she was Marcus in pony form. Or Rarity, as the curly hair didn't come out right at all. Wait, her hair is WAVY, not curly.
I crumpled it up.
"Pinkamena Diane Pie, PAY ATTENTION," Mother snapped.
I came to attention and dropped the pen. "I didn't do it!"
Blinky and Inky laughed and I laughed too.
"Let's try this again," Mom said.
"I'll start," Dad said. "I left home in search of adventure and because I didn't want to bake for a living. Your mother was singing in a saloon on the frontier when I met her, while I was looking for work."
I tried to imagine mother singing in a saloon. It was COMPLETELY impossible and the mere effort caused smoke to come out of my ears and my left foreknee to shake.
"I can sing you know. You got it from me," Mom said flatly.
Inky now launched into some song in Elvish for no apparent reason. Focus, Inky, it's story time! Don't get distracted.
I felt this odd sensation as if Gummy had latched onto my right flank, but a quick check showed that he was, in fact, not there at all.
"I know," I said. "But you only sing hymns."
She got up and shut the door; we were in her and father's room on the ship. Then she got into this odd stance, leaning on the bed with her hind legs on the floor and began to belt out Twist Your Tail For Me, My Darling, which is a somewhat raunchy song. Blinky turned red and Inky stared, eyes wide. Father got this... grin. I have never seen such a grin on his face, but he was smiling very appreciatively at Mom and I had this weird twitch in my left hindleg that I have never had before, yet it makes me nervous.
Few things make me nervous.
"We get the point," Blinky squeaked out.
"Anyway, one thing led to another, and we ended up heavily in debt and had to rob a train in order to pay it off. After that, we were on the run," Dad said. "It's a long story and mostly involves a lot of stupidity and buying jewelry I couldn't afford. So the Apples, some other friends of ours, and us ended up becoming the Ghostly Gang."
My nose twitched. "The Apples?"
"They were from Whinneychester," Dad said. "Your friend Applejack might be related to them, in fact."
"Where did the masks come from?" I asked.
"We rescued a Glantrian wizard from some bulettes," Dad said. "He made us the masks in gratitude."
"So we all had adventures for a while," Mom said. "Until eventually, we went to the wrong dungeon and unleashed this hideous yellow beholder. It chased us through the dungeon, trying to eat us all while we ran for our lives. We escaped but we had to go into hiding. Eventually, we helped some of Celestia's troops defeat it but it caused so much damage that we ended up retiring and getting religion and becoming rock farmers. We felt pretty guilty. Then we finally got married and had you all," she finished, sighing. "We did some good, we did some bad, but in the end, we felt the need to repent and atone and be honest citizens."
"But I bet you enjoyed having an adventure!" I said to her.
She smiled a little. "Yes. And it looks like it's not over yet."
"So what exactly is going on?" Inky asked me.
"Okay, everyone settle in," I told them. "It's going to take a while, but I LOVE telling stories."
I love pie more, but that's in the blood. So I got started explaining everything to them.
*************
MARCUS-O-VISION RETURNS:
I was eventually summoned by Scootaloo. "Aye, aye, Navigator Scootaloo," I said to her. "How may I assist the Dread Pirate Scootaloo?" Rule one, always curry favor, even with kids. They will grow up one day.
"You have to stand here and cause trouble to happen so I can get my cutie mark," she said, studying the open skies. We were flying above the clouds to hide our passage. And making our own clouds, thanks to Equestrian soldier ponies.
Oh yeah, the only way to fly.
I laughed nervously. "Disaster doesn't just follow me everywhere," I said, lying.
Damn you, universe.
"Hmm, nothing bad is happening yet. Maybe if Rarity kisses you, you'll get happy and the universe will wreck it," Scootaloo mused.
"Wraah, I'm so unhappy, miserable and alone!" I fake-wailed. I couldn't help it; a man must fire back or no longer call himself a man.
"No, I need you happy so everything will go to hell, dammit!" Scootaloo said, turning around.
"Fillies shouldn't curse AND you need to keep your eyes on the wheel!" I said.
She sighed and turned back around. "Stop being selfish and get happy so I can get my cutie mark, dammit!"
Several of the crew were laughing; this did not help her mood.
So I called for Sweetie and we sat in the corner of the bridge with me trying to teach her some magic. I'm pretty sure the universe will not respond to this with a disaster which gives Scootaloo her Cutie Mark, but the lesson is good for her.
I have a very minor fire making spell, not my combat one, this one is just for lighting candles and the like. So I got some candles and Sweetie began studying the spell with her horn as I lit a candle with it. It took her a half dozen tries to get it right, but she smiled so brightly that I ruffled her hair and we both smiled brightly at each other.
I felt very happy.
That's when the alarms went off.
Damn you, universe.
It was a pair of green and purple dragons, with scales like shimmering gemstones, a good seventy feet or so long (with sixty foot tails); they moved swiftly with powerful wings and their eyes glowed softly. "Don't fire," I said. "It's a pair of Amethyst dragons! Someone get Spike!"
We must be over North Marech; there's a clan of dragons here from which Spike comes. They're likely relatives.
"Wait, they're friendly?" Scootaloo said, hoof above a button that said 'Fire the Giant Death Ray'. DEATH RAY?
"They're like Spike," I said. "Get your hoof away from that!"
"It doesn't actually work," Sweetie said, sounding disappointed.
That's probably for the best. "Why?"
"We need the skull of a demi-lich, according to the manual," she said. "I'm not even sure what a demi-lich is."
Let's hope you NEVER find out. Brrrr.
"Is it just a floating front half of a lich?" she asked. "I know a demi-quaver is half a quaver."
"Holy shit, did you just deduce something by logic?" Scootaloo said, shocked.
"You shouldn't curse," she said primly. "And I am PERFECTLY able to do logic. You're the illogical one!"
"I am NOT," Scootaloo said hotly, turning to face her.
"No arguing while you are DRIVING," I said. "How do we hail them?"
One of the officers now handed me... a cup with a string attached, running into the wall.
"..."
"You just speak into it," he said confidently.
"Hail, dragons well met, of the clan of Shining Amethyst, wardens of the North Marech," I said. "We are the..." I paused. "What's our ship name?" I asked Sweetie.
"Scootaloo's House of Awesome," Scootaloo said.
"PSS Flying Tree House," Sweetie said.
"Moonraker, sir," one of the soldiers said.
"Ooh, I like that," I said. "This is the ESS Moonraker," I announced to the Dragon. "I am Samus Marcus, Agent of the Crown of Equestria. Do you wish to board?"
"I am Blue Wing and this is my mate, Shining Star," one of the Amethysts said. I couldn't tell, even by his voice, that he was male and not female except he said so.
"Boarding Deck two, OPEN," Scootaloo said, hitting a button on the wheel; I heard groaning noises.
Time to organize a meeting party.
**************
Rarity had gone to see Twilight but now they and Fluttershy and Spike and the Dread Pirate Lunette joined us all on the Flight Deck, which I noticed had a bunch of hang-gliders in it. The two dragons landed and turned into forms... kind of like lizardmen. Humanoid, but scaled, like Spike. They immediately gave Spike a hug. "This is my aunt and uncle!" he said proudly. "I haven't seen them in a while!"
"It's good to see you," Shining Star said. "We were patrolling and saw this ship and had to find out what it was and if it was a threat."
"It's good to see you again," Twilight said, bowing to them. I guess they've met.
"And you as well," Shining Star said. "I hope Spike hasn't caused you too much trouble."
"He's a huge help to me," Twilight said. "I am fortunate to have him." She nuzzled him affectionately while he looked embarrassed.
"Aww geez, Twilight," he said.
Lunette now explained everything to them, then introduced everyone.
They got a tour of the ship, then went to talk to Spike in private. I felt good for him that he got a chance to see some of his kin even if he was likely going to be trying to convince them to eat me.
Ahahaha.
I went off to go get some sleep as I was utterly exhausted. Rarity was off with Twilight again, so I just fell down and crashed out after changing into my nightrobe.
***************
I woke up groggily to the sound of Rarity making panic noises in the hallway; she'd gotten caught in a net trap, which I got her out of. "Good talk?" I asked groggily.
"I'm going to have to chew out Apple Bloom later," she said, yawning, then changed into a nightrobe. "We had a good talk," she said. "We did some planning, which soothed her."
"Good," I said. "Let's sleep."
We cuddled up together, both in human form and I dreamed of us looting Talitha's treasure palace together; she's an immortal dedicated to greed and hoarding and taking other people's stuff. Trust me, she'd have it coming or at the very least, it would be worth the risk.
Now I wish I had a pile of treasure we could roll around on together.
Of course, then I dreamed of her hunting us to the ends of Mystara and that was less cool.
But to be expected.
*****************
Through Spike's Eyes:
I was very excited to see my aunt and uncle, though this wasn't our first meeting. They had woken from the dragon slumber shortly after Eric had run for the hills (like the cowardly, backstabbing bastard that he is), and come to Canterlot, where I got to meet them. They live in the North Marech, north of the Buffalo. It's the most thinly settled part of Equestria and home to a fair number of gemstone dragons allied to Equestria.
"And this was all designed by a filly?" Uncle Blue Wing said, quite stunned. He was my father's brother. Grandfather is still in the dragon slumber; grandmother was banished to another plane three centuries ago and never seen again. (My aunt Shining Star's parents are on the distant continent of Skothar. Neither she nor I is sure if they're alive or dead.) My other aunts and uncles are scattered across the continent. Dragon families are often not big on keeping in touch, really. I think it's because they have to eat so much that they need to spread out. Once a child gets very old, they have to leave home or they and their parent will starve to death.
"She's marked for a high destiny, Twilight thinks," I told them. "I'm boggled myself."
We were up on an observation deck, near the top of the tree; most everyone was asleep now and I would have been asleep but I was too excited. I like my friends and living in Ponyville is nice, but it's just cool to be around some other dragons for once. People who will get me.
"How are your studies with your mother coming?" Aunt Shining Star asked, affectionately ruffling my spines.
"Pretty well," I told her. "Right now, we're too busy saving Equestria again to study much, though." I like action, though. I'm the man of action to Twilight's thoughtfulness. Makes us a good team. "She's not my mother, though."
"She's effectively your mother," Uncle Blue Wing said firmly. "One day, you will leave the nest, but for now, you must obey her and help her and she will protect you and help you to grow stronger and wiser." He studied me thoughtfully and I tried to read his expression. Calm? Curious? With ponies, you have to be blind and have no nose not to know how they feel, but my Aunt and Uncle smell the same regardless of mood.
"You share a great destiny," Aunt Shining Star said. She said that last time but wouldn't talk about it and I wish I knew why. Was her voice sad? I can't tell. That really frustrates me. I know my voice is easy to read, at least for alert people. But while they're both kind and affectionate to me, I struggle to tell what they feel behind their words.
But this time, I'm going to ask them the question I wanted to ask last time but was afraid to. "Why do I have a different breath weapon than other Amethyst dragons?" I said, breathing a little fire to show off.
They looked at each other, which made me nervous. "Did you read the book I pointed out to you last time?" Uncle Blue Wing said, turning and studying me.
"Mostly. A year ago," I told him. "It was very confusing and philosophical." Which is to say, boring beyond belief. Tedious. Long-winded. It used twenty words when three would be enough.
He blinked. "It was?"
"I would think a young dragon would find Marlo Toney's Guide to Young Dragon Development to be interesting," Aunt Shining Star said, clearly confused. Oddly, her confusion was comforting because I could tell how she felt.
I READ THE WRONG BOOK.
Which I can't admit.
Uncle Blue Wing sighed. "Spike, you should have read it."
"I forgot and tried to read another book," I told them, embarrassed.
"It can help you to understand these matters. Also, Twilight has read it and can discuss it with you," Aunt Shining Star said a little sternly.
"She was very well educated in your needs," Uncle Blue Wing said. "When we last met."
"But why do I breathe fire?" I asked.
"There are several possibilities," Uncle Blue Wing said, looking out across the clouds. "But I cannot, you must understand, speak definitively on these matters."
I nodded.
"The most likely one is that you have developed a unique magical talent due to the influence of Twilight's magic on hatching you," he said sonorously. "The second possibility is that your parents were conducting some sort of experiment before they died, which transformed you in the egg. The third is that it is literally a shadow of your destiny, though this remains disputed as to whether it is possible."
"That is mere speculation and it is unclear how such a thing is compatible with Quein's Exclusion Theorem Number Two," Aunt Shining Star said lecturingly.
Don't ask me what that is.
I got nothing.
They had an argument for ten minutes of which I understood almost nothing.
I don't know if all my kind are like this or my aunt and uncle are just special. They fight a lot, though generally one of them apologizes in the end. Amethysts don't mate for love, they find someone with the right qualities to produce the 'best' offspring. This seems crazy to me.
Which makes me wonder why I think that, given all the other Amethysts I've met agree on that.
But I've also noticed I'm more bipedal than other dragons.
"It remains unsolved," Aunt Shining Star finally said. Clearly this was going to have to pass for an apology.
Uncle Blue Wing looked triumphant. "Have you been able to manifest any psionic abilities yet?"
Amethyst dragons eventually become psionic. But I can't even do the right breath weapon yet. "My only special ability is my teleporting fire."
"And I envy you that," my aunt said; she really did sound envious. "It's a very useful, potent ability. I expect it's because fire is the element of magic, and your birth was tied to the element of magic."
"His hatching," Uncle Blue Wing said pedantically.
Aunt Shining Star frowned, then sighed. "His hatching, yes. Amethyst dragons are normally attuned to the Sphere of Thought. I suspect you have been attuned to the Sphere of Fire. You should get Twilight to try teaching you some spells."
That would be pretty cool. "But I don't have a horn," I told her. "I'm not sure if her style can work with me."
"I know she uses spellbooks written for humans and the like," Uncle Blue Wing said. "So it should be fine. Dragons who do learn wizardry normally can share spells with humans, elves, and the like as well."
"Could you teach me a spell?" I asked hopefully.
"Well, we didn't bring our books," he said, frowning. "I didn't even think of it."
"Nor I, since I did not know Spike would be here," Aunt Shining Star confessed. She looked thoughtful. "You can breathe water, right?"
"I breathe fire," I said, then realized what she meant. "Yes. That's because I'm an Amethyst, right?"
"Yes," she said, looking relieved. "Can you walk on water yet?"
"No," I said dolefully. I am not old enough; you generally have to be around fifteen or so before you can do that as an Amethyst dragon.
"He's not old enough yet," Uncle Blue Wing said. "As we both know."
"You never know," Aunt Shining Star said, frowning. "Well, we could borrow one of Twilight's books and try to teach you something before we have to go. We can't stay too long."
I sighed. "It's okay. I will ask Twilight about it." It just would have been nice to learn something from them. Something dragony.
"I am very sorry," Aunt Shining Star said. "Next time we visit you, we will bring a book and teach you some spells."
"Thanks," I said. But that may be a while. As I mentioned, Dragons tend to stick to their own territory. The nicer ones have some social instincts which clash with that, but dragons tend to be solitary.
Unlike me.
I love being around people and I don't really want to go live off by myself one day. That seems kind of lonely and depressing.
But dragons shouldn't think like that.
I am working myself up for no reason when I ought to be happy like one of those stupid stories Twilight reads when she's depressed. Which thankfully isn't often.
"How old will I be when I learn to shapeshift?" I asked.
"At least a hundred or so," Aunt Shining Star said. "You shouldn't even worry about it. You'll undergo dragon slumber many times before that." She paused. "You've only been through it once, right?"
"Yes," I told her. "I still have to sleep a lot, though. I can't wait for that to be over." My body now tried to make me go to sleep but I fought it. Once I wake, they'll be gone. "Twilight totally panicked when I went through it," I said, grinning. I shouldn't enjoy that but she is so funny when she's frantic.
They both laughed, but then Uncle Blue Wing got serious. "I take it this is about the white unicorn, Rarity."
"I... no... I mean... yes," I squeaked.
They both looked worried, which made ME worried. Then Uncle Blue Wing said uncomfortably, "You will have to undergo the dragon slumber again before you are old enough for mating, you know."
"I'm surprised he even thinks about it," Aunt Shining Star said to Uncle Blue Wing.
"I just want to be her hero," I said to my feet. "Instead of that BASTARD Erik of Vestland."
"Who?" Uncle Blue Wing said.
"Wait, wasn't he the one who dated Twilight for a while?" Aunt Shining Star said, making a furrowed face of trying to remember. "Isn't he a human?"
"He's a unicorn human," I said bitterly. "He's a hat-obsessed thief and a coward and I can't see what Rarity sees in him AT ALL."
To my surprise, my aunt now turned into a human; she had long purple hair and green fingernails and wore a purple and green dress; her skin was about the same color as Marcus. She stared off at the clouds and the stars, then said, "Hmm, yes, I can see that."
What?
"See what?" Uncle said, looking where she was looking.
I just saw stars.
"Can he shapeshift?" my aunt asked curiously.
"We have magic candy for it now," I told her.
"I can see why they would wish to breed," she said. "Most creatures do not choose mates rationally, unlike our kind. However, if he can take a pony form and her a human form, I think they'd actually make a good breeding pair. The children would be strong in magic and intelligent. I'd have to study their bio-tapestries to be sure, though."
Aunt Shining Star has psionic powers that let her read people's biological patterns; among other things, it lets her tell who is compatible for mating, which is how she and my Uncle ended up a mating pair. She calls it 'reading the bio-tapestry'. Something about threads which make up how your body works or something. She tried to tell me and my brain died.
"Intelligent," I said, grumbling. "He uses his intelligence to make people like him, then he stabs them in the back and runs away laughing! He's going to make her cry!"
My aunt now picked me up and hugged me tightly. I turned a little red and my uncle looked a little embarrassed and turned and studied the stars. "The body shapes the mind," she said softly.
I do not understand what this has to do with Erik being EVIL and needing to be destroyed, or at least encouraged to do what he does best.
Running away like a little bitch.
"I don't understand."
"As a human, I feel a stronger bond to you," she said. "The body and the mind influence each other. You can make yourself sick by worrying about being sick; your body influences your thoughts." She sighed. "I wish I could stay longer. I would love to talk to some of your friends who have done shapeshifting about their experiences."
"Well, you're welcome to stay," I said hopefully.
"We both have experiments to get back to and since we didn't plan this in advance, we only have basic security on our lair," Uncle Blue Wing said. "By the time we made arrangements, you'd be long gone."
"I'll get them to send you some letters," I told her.
"You are such a sweet, sweet boy," she said, kissing my forehead.
I was stunned. They're not usually this affectionate. Indeed, I could see my Uncle was very embarrassed. He mumbled something.
"I wish you had hair to ruffle," she said, so I ruffled hers and she laughed. Then she put me down. "Spike, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you need to give up on Rarity. She seems like a fine young lady but you are too young for mating and she clearly has chosen someone else. I could see how they were."
"Irrational as it is," Uncle Blue Wing said disapprovingly.
"While it likely IS motivated by raw emotion, I think they will have suitable children," Aunt Shining Star said. "I am the expert on such things, you know."
Now Uncle Blue Wing grumbled but gave in.
"Well, who am I compatible with?" I said in frustration. "It seems like... He's BAD for her."
"I think you should consider the pony who designed this place. You could have the most AMAZING lair if she can design this at this age. By the time you're old enough to lair on your own, she likely will be able to build something incredible." My aunt clearly sounded kind of jealous.
"She's a student of that crazy wizard Keraptis," I said. "Which seems dangerous to me." I frowned. I guess with her parents dead, there's no one to really tell her... well, there is Granny Smith and her siblings, but they don't seem to care.
I mean, they care about her, but they aren't stopping her corresponding with... wait, how IS she contacting him?
"My goodness. I wouldn't want to risk one of my hatchlings in his hands, but on the other hand, he is a genius," my aunt said.
"He's a crazed builder of deathtraps," my uncle said, frowning. "This woman might be too crazy herself for Spike."
"She seemed like a sweet young filly and I think she IS the same age as Spike. More or less equivalent, anyway," Aunt Shining Star said firmly. "You should try spending some time with her. I should have taken a bio-tapestry scan but I didn't even think about it."
"You couldn't know," Uncle Blue Wing said. "Her name is Apple Bloom, right?"
"Yes," I told him. "She's Applejack's little sister."
They looked at each other. I know this look. It is the look of adults who know things they are not going to tell you.
"I agree. She would make a good friend for you and be suitable for relief of your instincts if you need to do that," he said.
"I am not just looking to... what does relieving instincts mean, anyway?" It sounds like bedwetting which I have not done in YEARS.
"You'll understand when you're older," my uncle said.
"We think she would make a good fillyfriend for you," my aunt said.
See, THAT I understand. "But she's so rustic and I'm a city boy," I said.
My uncle's eyes crossed a moment, then he said, "We live in the countryside too, you know." He sounded irritated.
"Yes, but you... I mean..." DAMMIT. "I'm sorry," I told him. "You're not farmers, though."
"I'm sure someone who could build this and you would find interesting things to do," my aunt said with that kind of tone of voice which I know means someone is trying to persuade me. It's odd, I can read her much better like this than as her... is that a lizardman form? It's not quite the same. It's more like my body, really.
"Anyway, I can't just change how I feel like that," I said.
"This is why our kind abandoned such instincts long ago," Uncle Blue Wing said. "Remaining in pursuit of a mate who has already chosen someone else is a waste of time. You should move on." He was quite insistent.
"I don't even know how," I said. "I want to get rid of that punk Erik! I thought..." He betrayed me and Twilight and he WILL betray Rarity.
Seeing Spikey makes it worse, really. He's older than me, I think. Or maybe just... he seems older.
Dammit.
My aunt picked me up and I turned red again. She stroked my head. "My dear little nephew," she said with a warmth she wasn't used to. "While vengeance is a draconic tradition, you shouldn't bite anything you can't actually swallow. You'll be happier if you let him go, hard as it is."
"Think about it clearly," Uncle Blue Wing said. "He is older and more powerful with strong allies. While Twilight would defend you to the death, these are her friends. You can't go it alone and really, succumbing to irrationality is not the Amethyst way."
I tensed up in frustration, though being held by my aunt was nice. I could tell that he was also directing that to my aunt, who was wallowing in 'irrationality'. But I felt better now, so I wasn't going to stop her. Embarrassing as it is.
She put me down and studied the sky. "I fear we need to go," she said. "And you should sleep."
I yawned. "I am too excited to sleep."
She picked me up one more time and carried me down to Twilight's room. "I am going to be so embarrassed when I change back," she said gleefully.
My uncle grumbled and I couldn't help but laugh a little. "You could just ride home on my uncle's back."
"I'll be fine, but thank you," she said, and kissed my forehead.
My uncle patted my shoulder. "Good luck on your quest. Come see us some time."
"Okay," I told them, then yawned. "Thanks for dropping by."
"Well, we were afraid we'd have to destroy this thing," my uncle said. "Or send for help. You may have trouble with Sind or Darokin."
"We'll be fine," I told him. "My friends and I, we can defeat ANY foe! We're really tough," I said proudly.
"Good," Uncle Blue Wing said. "Be strong. Show them the power of dragons. And let your enemies flee before you once you show them who is the true master." He sounded proud and urgent at once.
"Of course," I told them. "I showed that stupid owl who is boss in our house!"
My aunt put her hand over her mouth, but my uncle said, "Exactly. See you later, Spike."
Twilight stuck her head out. "Spike, come to bed or you will be a..." YAWN. "Zombie tomrororoow."
What on earth was that last word?
"Sorry to wake you," my aunt said to her. "We're about to go."
"Already?" Twilight said disappointed. "I was hoping we could talk some matters arcane."
I could feel this odd thing. "My skin is crawling," I said.
My aunt paused, then looked proud. "Spike, that's good."
"It's all itchy and I don't like it," I said, scratching all over.
"It means you can feel my mental power being used," she said.
"Well, well, very good, Spike," my uncle said.
"Oh wow. I've never felt it before," I said.
"Very few ponies have any sort of psionics," Twilight said, yawning. "Though I do have that psionic testing kit Shining Star gave me. We should probably try it again when we get home."
"I think Apple Bloom and her friends still have it," I told her.
"You could get her to run the tests on you," my aunt said, winking at me.
Twilight rubbed her eyes. "What?"
"Later, Twi," I told her. Then I nearly fell down. "I guess maybe I slee..."
Then I fell asleep, right there. How embarrassing!
************
Back to Marcus-O-Vision:
I was somewhat confused when, instead of being in bed with Rarity, I was floating in a starry void. Each star, when I looked at it, grew a little and I got a glimpse of someone I know: Ivan, Helga, Rarity, Twilight, Sweetie, and so on. Someone was knocking on something but I couldn't tell what, given I was floating in my nightrobe in a void. "Hello?" I asked.
"May we come in?" It was Blue Wing, though his voice echoed distantly.
"Sure, but... where am I and how do you 'come in'?"
The air rippled and two huge dragons stepped in, Blue Wing and Shining Star. They rippled and turned into human forms. Blue Wing was nearly seven feet tall, which I will say is just a little intimidating. And hugely muscled. Shining Star was only about five foot ten, looking like a Thyatian, except for long purple hair and green fingernails. He, on the other hand, was a blue haired northman, complete with beard.
She looked around. "Not very versed in telepathic affairs, I take it."
"Is that what this is?" I said, now rather nervous, realizing I'd invited Spike's kin INSIDE MY MIND.
"May I?" Blue Wing said, gesturing.
"Sure," I said, then regretted it. What had I just agreed to?
Bing, instead comfortable living room with chairs. Just the way I like it.
"We've heard the Spike version of your story but now we'd like to hear it form you," Blue Wing said solemnly.
I am very lucky they asked and didn't just eat me. I told them everything I could.
"You owe Spike," Blue Wing said flatly.
"I know but he hates me too much for me to try to make it up to him," I said, frustrated.
Shining Star said to her husband. "I was right. They will have strong children."
"..." I stared mindlessly.
"Honey, you should ask him first," Blue Wing said. "He invited us to talk, not to rifle through everything we might find." His voice was stern.
"It's best you know you and Rarity will have powerful, intelligent children one day," Shining Star said cheerfully. "And it's easier to get forgiveness than permission."
Ahahaha.
"Please, no more rifling," I said urgently.
"I told you," Blue Wing said, shaking his head. "We've tried to encourage Spike to reorient towards young Miss Apple Bloom if he must chose his mates on the whims of the flesh instead of rational mate selection." He sounded annoyed this was even necessary. "Is she actually old enough to have any interest in men yet?"
"I think she's actually still at the 'boys are icky and stupid' phase, but I expect she'll now have her growth surge and change her mind on that," I told them.
"Oh, you are versed in pony biology?" Shining Star said hopefully.
"Somewhat," I told her. "Most specifically, I taught Unicorn children for a year. If I guess her age right, she's going to first grow taller, then fill out and in the middle of that, she'll start taking an interest in boys. Or girls."
"What would the point be with a girl?" Blue Wing asked.
Another reminder that dragons don't think like us. At least not Amethysts. "Many sentients develop an interest in romance without actually seeking to bear children," I told him. "Most seek out the opposite sex but some don't."
He looked very confused. "I have heard of this before but it seems to me like trying to mate with a rock."
Let's not even get into humanity's crazier impulses. "It's why Rarity and I, or maybe Spike and Apple Bloom could have a romance, whether we sought children or not."
He paused, looking thoughtful.
"Anyway, please be kind to Spike. He's a good boy and I hope you can reconcile with him," Shining Star said. "We should go and let you sleep."
"Thanks for talking to me and not just eating me on Spike's say-so," I said. I had meant to be somewhat more slick.
"We are friends of Equestria and humans, to be honest, taste lousy," Shining Star said. They rose and said farewell.
Only when I slipped back into slumber did I wonder how she actually knew.
****************
For some reason, Spike was staring at my head during all of breakfast. I tried to ignore it and just eat. We were somewhere over Sind now, heading towards the Darokinian border.
I think. As we had a solid cloud bank under us. Hopefully, Scootaloo knows what she's doing.
AHHAHAHAHAHA.
I was quite surprised when a pink and yellow-furred and winged wolf joined us for breakfast, wearing a golden torc. Then I realized it was Fluttershy. "Hi, Fluttershy, that's new," I said.
"Oooh," Applejack said. "Now I've got an idea."
What?
Wolf-Fluttershy cocked her head. "An idea?"
Twilight passed her some pancakes and fruit with magic. "Thinking about cooperative fighting?" Twilight said.
"Hey, how you'd know?" Applejack asked.
"Well, you and Winona work together, so I would think Flutterwolf and you could do the same," Twilight said.
Good thinking, I thought.
"That would be nice," Flutterwolf said, trying to sound friendly. However, her voice came out rough.
She was about to eat when I said, "Can you actually eat that in wolf form?" I asked.
"She has a mouth, sugarcube," Applejack said. "Oh wait, you're right. I dunno if she can."
Flutterwolf paused and looked embarrassed. "You're right. I'm going to need meat."
"Well, it's a sign you're still in control, right?" I told her.
She blinked, then smiled. "You're right!"
Flutterwolf ended up having a steak. Sweetie had thought ahead and stocked up some meat, which I thanked her for when I found out.
Then she and Applejack went off to practice some combined tactics. I don't know if she'll be able to be aggressive enough for it, though.
But I wish them luck.
************
Twilight took me to her room after breakfast; the ship ran without us, so we all got ready for the trouble to come in our own way; Rarity got dragged off by Sweetie for something or another.
Spike sat to assist us, glaring at me intently, apparently trying to make me explode with his mind or something. I suppose some Amethyst dragons could.
Ivan joined us and Twilight picked our brains for every bit of information on the Broken Lands we could remember. She sent some questions to Helga too.
"Hmm, do you think our doubles would know about the tower?" Ivan said.
"Even if they know, can they find it?" I asked. "Though I suppose they have the same resources I hoped maybe to use to find it again," I said to Ivan.
Ivan nodded. "I'm thinking maybe we could either loot it and arm ourselves with any nifty Blackmoorian devices or even lure them into it. I think breaking into their fortress is likely to be counter-productive. They won't be limited at home the way they were in White Plume Mountain."
Twilight looked thoughtful.
"Maybe one team could draw them to the dungeon, while another infiltrates and rescues the Radhirajah, who I bet they will leave in their fortress," Spike said.
"I like that idea," Twilight said. "Luna and Ivan and the most stealthy soldiers could break into the fortress while the rest of us announce we've heard of a weapon that can destroy Marjorie that is inside the tower, you can't stop us now, and so on."
We called in Lunette and she and Twilight now worked out a plan. I threw in one observation, though. "If we don't do something, the Cutie Mark Crusaders WILL try to help by breaking into one of the places or tagging alone in someone's saddlebags or attacking the fortress headon with this flying treehouse or something. They have to feel they are contributing, or they will 'contribute'."
They shouldn't be here; it's too dangerous for kids. But I fear they'll show up anyway.
"They have to stay and hold the ship in reserve, of course," Twilight said. "Ready to come rescue us if we fall. That will keep them here."
I hope.
*************
We were crossing Lake Amsorak now. Fluttershy and Applejack showed up for lunch, all sweaty but cheerful. "How did it go?" I asked.
"Great!" Applejack said.
"Woof!" Flutterwolf said, then stood there panting with her tongue hanging out.
Oh bloody hell.
*************
Rarity had to take her food to her as Fluttershy hid under her bed in frustration. Lunette took her aside for a long talk.
"Poor dear," Rarity said. "I don't feel like I am acting differently. Am I?"
I kissed her softly and she smiled. "Feels good, right?"
"Yes," she said.
"You are, but it's more subtle because you are closer to a human in personality than Fluttershy. Well, there are shy humans but she takes it further," I told her. "And humans and ponies are closer than ponies and wolves."
"If I turned into Twilight, would I act bookish?" she said, looking thoughtful.
"Probably not," I told her. "You'd just manifest the usual pony traits and physical needs."
We kissed again; we were in a... I don't know what this room is for; it has lots of chairs that ponies can't actually sit in, they're designed for humans and tables at human heights. But it's good for us.
Then Captain Keen Eyes snorted. Hello, bite me, Captain.
"Hello, father, how are you?" Rarity asked cheerfully, clearly determined to ignore his bad mood.
"So you can't even accept her as she is," he said darkly, looking tired and sounding crabby.
"Father, Marcus spent a week, over a week as a pony with me. The least I can do is reciprocate," Rarity said, frowning. "You are going to have to accept that sometimes I am going to be a human. And he will be a pony. And sometimes not." She closed her eyes, then opened them, more determined. "But it doesn't mean I don't love you." She strode over and embraced him, scratching his right side gently. "You're my father, but I left home a long time ago, you know."
"The more I know about his background, the less I like him," Captain Keen Eyes said.
"Celestia and Luna know more than you and they trust me," I said. THAT made him wince. "If you won't trust your own daughter's judgement, though, I doubt I can persuade you."
"Captain Lunette wishes to see you two," he said. Then he nuzzled Rarity. "I love you too. That's why I don't like him."
Rarity sighed and kissed his forehead, then took my hand and we went and eventually found Lunette and Fluttershy in a room cleared of furniture. Applejack was here, busy practicing with a lasso and looking confused.
"Hello, princess," I said; I bowed and Rarity curtseyed.
"We're going to help Fluttershy," Lunette said kindly. "You two have some experience shapeshifting, and Applejack needs to learn as well."
"I'd be glad... wait, what?" Applejack said, stunned.
"Now now, you think everyone needs to be naked, right?" Lunette said, amused. "Well, you're not really naked with all that fur."
"It ain't fur, it's hair," Applejack said frantically.
"Now, now, you got to see me naked," I told her. "Lots of naked." I was probably enjoying this too much.
"I won't make you, but it will help Fluttershy if you work through these exercises with her," Lunette said.
HAMMER THE GUILT AND FRIENDSHIP BUTTONS, I thought. Hammer them wildly. Nicely done, Luna.
"It's okay, I understand," Fluttershy said. "It's not your job to do this," she said to Applejack.
I could almost taste the guilt settling in. "Fine. Whammy me with candy or whatever."
"Fluttershy, you will work with Rarity, Applejack, you with Marcus," Lunette said.
Ivan would probably be better, but I'll do my best.
She touched Applejack, who now turned into a tabby cat. Fluttershy was pink and yellow in her cat form. Her torc shrank with her. "Dammit, Marcus, why do you smell so tasty?" Applecat said, making a frowny kitty face. SO CUTE.
"You smell nice, Rarity," Fluttercat said, rubbing against Rarity's leg.
"Don't take a bite to find out," I told Applecat warily.
"You smell good but I am not sure what you smell like," Applecat said, strutting towards me.
Rarity picked up Fluttercat and scritched her behind the ears, smiling, while Fluttercat made happy kitty noises.
"Don't enjoy it so much or you'll start losing yourself. You have to focus and seal away part of yourself beyond the instincts," Lunette said.
"How?" Applecat said. "My stupid nose keeps telling me Marcus smells very good."
"Hey, I do smell good."
"Marcus has a wonderful smell," Rarity said. "I just wish he smelled the same in both forms." She sniffed Fluttercat. "Or that I could smell much in this form."
"No cuddling," Lunette said firmly to Fluttercat.
"But I LIKE cuddling," Fluttercat mumbled.
Applecat circled my legs and reared up, putting her forepaws on my leg. Claws out. "OWW," I said.
"Sorry, pardner," she said. Her claws flicked in and out twice.
"Stop that!" I said.
"Tryin' to get the hang of it," she said. "It's hard to think clearly."
"Think about something you love," Lunette said. "Focus on that and only that."
"Okay, this is weird," Applecat said after a bit. "I ain't got no hankerin' for apples. Seems like they're kinda... Okay, being a cat is just WRONG."
"Bunnies, so tasty...," Fluttercat said dreamily. "No wait, NO, no eating bunnies!" She began batting herself with her paws.
"Remember why you like apples," Lunette said urgently. "Why you like hugging bunnies," she said to Fluttercat. "You have to take some important pieces of you and nail them in place, let the rest of you rally around them."
"Apples, apples, red delicious, granny smith, akane, alfriston, arlet, fish, king luscious, rats... RATS ARE NOT APPLES. Knobbed russet, kinsei... fi... fi... florina, foxwhelp," Applecat paced around me.
"Fireside, fiesta and Caurenzian Blue," I told her.
"Wait, a blue apple?" she said in confusion.
"Angel, my dear little bunny, I miss you," Fluttercat said softly. "You can be stubborn but you love me and I love you and you watch over me and I watch over you."
"I always love our time together," Rarity said soothingly, petting her.
"Put her down, or it will get too comfortable and she'll slip," Lunette said.
We kept on working with them until they got some control. Whether that could be kept in a stress situation, I wasn't so sure and they were both pretty drained afterwards.
"Thanks for helping," Fluttershy said to Applejack. They were back to normal.
"Ain't no thing," she said.
"You owe Ivan to try human form some time," I told her.
"Rarity would dress me up," she said as if this was an objection.
"I would love to try some fashions on you, darling," Rarity said.
"Another time," Applejack said. "I'm gonna take a bath and get some rest. Tomorrow, we arrive at our target, right?"
"Yes," I told her.
"I pray this is gonna be over," Applejack said. "Big Mac's probably working himself to death right now. Grannie can't help him much and even Apple Bloom ain't home."
"I am sure he is just fine," Rarity said.
***************
Big Macintosh Speaks:
"WYAAAAA!!!!" I heard Lily shout. What the hay is going on? I had been busy checking apple trees on the east side for this nasty rot that's been going around; she and Daisy and Roseluck had volunteered to plow the corn field for me, as the corn's come in and we're planting a second crop. I was slow to agree ta it, but really, I needed their help and they were taking the day off.
I felt bad taking their day off, but they insisted for some reason.
Well, at least we'd all have a nice bath together afterwards. Company makes it feel better. Even if Granny kept snickerin' during lunch for some reason. She claimed her embargo was actin' up.
Been a long time since my schoolin', but I don't think you can get an embargo in your body.
Not a pony body, anyway.
Roseluck ran up as I ran towards the yelping. "Big Mac, your friend and Daisy are being dragged down the hill by the plow!"
WHAT?
"Wait, who?" I said as we ran.
"Her name is Vanilla Surprise," Roseluck said. "She said her afternoon work got cancelled so she came to Ponyville to help you out for a few hours before she has to work in the evening." For some reason, she frowned about this.
It should, in theory, be impossible for a plow to pull two Earth Ponies down a hill. Lily was running around, crashing into trees and shouting that the world was ending. About what I'd expect her to do if she dropped food off her plate at dinner. Daisy and Vanilla Surprise, also known as Princess Celestia, were tangled up in the hauling ropes and clobbering each other as they tried to get free. While the plow pulled them down the hill at a good clip.
Somehow. I can't actually see magic or nothing but I have a feeling someone either was trying to be funny and got caught in her own joke or maybe was trying to make the plow go faster or something.
I ran up and seized the lines and Roseluck helped me while her sister freaked out.
"Oh, Big Mac, you saved me!" Daisy said, then nuzzled me warmly.
"Oh Big Mac, you saved me!" Vanilla Surprise said in a flawless imitation of her tone and nuzzled me also on the other side.
Daisy blinked and Roseluck frowned. Lily said, "Wait, are we done already?"
Dammit, somethin's going on here. "What happened?" I asked.
"The plow, it was too heavy, and we got pulled back and, and..." Daisy began.
"I hope you don't mind me butting in; I wanted to repay you for your help to me in Canterlot," Vanilla Surprise said warmly. "Since my employer took your sister away, I felt it only right I ensure you didn't have to work alone, though I see you have many admirers."
"I'm not a mud-maker!" Daisy protested.
"I'm just helping a friend!" Lily said frantically.
"I know, he is totally hot," Roseluck said.
I blinked.
"Ever since our date, I keep thinking about you," Vanilla Surprise purred.
I wish I could tell if she actually likes me or if she's just messing with me. But it is right nice of her. "Well, let's get you all set up and I'll show you how not to get tangled. Then we can all take a nice bath and have dinner, Granny style."
"And one of her stories, I hope," Vanilla Surprise said. "I am ready to work, Big Macintosh," she said more seriously. "I do owe you."
How can she possibly have time for this? And I'm just one pony. Should I really be eating up the princess' time? What about all the ponies who don't have this kind of connection?
I felt right guilty.
Not guilty enough to say no given how behind I am. "Eyup, you do. Let's get y'all workin', as there is a ton to do before dinner."
How did I get into this?
***************
Back to Marcus' Viewpoint:
The plan was set. We'd approach the area, find the tower, and then the flying tree fortress would threaten Marjorie's base and drop hints we were here. By that time, our team should be positioned with control of the site. Or would have run for the hills. Ideally, we can cook up a proper ambush. At worst, we can at least fight them on neutral ground.
I got sent down with the scouting party, myself, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and five of the pegasi pony soldiers. The other pegasi looked a little jealous of the enlarging spell Twilight put on Dash.
"I think they want you," I whispered in her ear and she laughed nervously.
"I am a one-pony mare," she said firmly. "Just like my boyfriend despite all the mares who want him." Her voice wobbled a little.
"He knows you're the best pony," I said assuringly. "Feels like old times," I said as we soared along.
"We'd be solo," Dash said. "And I could open up. These ponies can't keep up with me."
We were soaring over the Broken Lands; this whole region was blown to bits by Elves who lived in the region after the fall of Blackmoor but long before modern Glantri. I'm not sure how and it's probably best I never find out.
As I would likely learn by exploding.
This part of the Broken Lands is mountainous but it's damaged mountains. All the mountains have cracks like someone raked them with giant claws and huge chunks of mountain lie in the valleys or even are wedged between slopes and peaks. They gradually slope down to the northeast, where there is a high plateau / depression which is very swampy with a large lake. I said it's a plateau and a depression because it's surrounded by cliffs down into it, but yet it's high above sea level in the middle of mountains. I really don't know how to describe it. But the depression is where we think Marjorie's base is carved into a cliff face on the northeastern side.
Southish of us, the mountains rise into very high yet busted peaks, covered with snow and a strange black ice which can be burned. That's right, flammable ice.
Hardy mountain goats picked their way through this mess below us, feeding on the scrub brush, patches of grass and the lush regions immediately around the rivers and springs which flow towards the lush, wet, cold depression.
As we flew, a troll threw itself off a cliff at a goat down below on a ledge. It grabbed the goat as it fell into the chasm below. The goat will die and the troll will live, recovering and eat it.
We all looked up even though we knew trolls can't fly.
I hope.
There was a gust of wind, scattering us, but the group came back together. "Still not seeing a tower," Dash told me.
"That's why we are scouting. I was last here on foot, so I know how it looks and the little valley it's next to, but I don't know the area clearly from above," I said.
We fanned out a bit but made sure to keep everyone in sight of each other. I hummed a little tune and Dash hummed along. "Feels so good to be out and about," she said. "The treehouse is cool but I have been cooped up so long that I want to MOVE."
"Don't go too fast, we might miss it," I said.
"I don't miss a THING," Dash said proudly. "As I speed like a speeding thing."
And articulate like an articulating thing. Heh.
"What's so funny?" she asked.
"Way, way back when we first met, I started thinking about how much easier you'd make it to find this place again, but at the time, I assumed things would end with me running away for my life. But here we are, just like I hoped but even better." I patted her shoulder. "I'm lucky to have met you all."
She looked kind of embarrassed. "Me too," she mumbled.
It's weird to me to put my trust in people, but I know I can rely on them. It scares me because that's usually when people start dying. I imagined Dash dying and my gut clenched. No way. I am not going to be the one who lives while everyone else dies.
Not again.
"I dunno if Fluttershy did the right thing," Dash said, still studying the land as we flew over it. "I mean, I would have done it but it probably meant we failed. But I couldn't just walk away from that."
"She did the tactically wrong but morally right thing," I said. "But many may die because we helped one family."
Dash grimaced at that.
This is why I hate comparative ethics. "But this is our chance to avoid that. If we succeed, then we'll have done the right thing and saved Equestria. This will give Equestria some leverage once we save the Radhirajah." Or so I hope.
"Doing the right thing shouldn't lead to the wrong thing," Dash grumbled.
Welcome to the real world, my friend.
"This mountain looks familiar," I said, studying a jagged triple peak whose east face was deeply riven; it was close to becoming two peaks. "Can we swing around the south side?"
"Hell yeah," Dash said and we climbed high and flew through the great gap which rent the mountain for nigh a thousand feet of its height. The others followed us at various heights and we passed through the chasm, dozens of feet across.
We emerged over a small valley where grass and trees grew, though they were purple and pink. A pleasant stream flowed out of the crack into the valley and there was a ruins of a nicely made castle in the NE corner of the valley; goats grazed among the trees. And there were statues.
Further, on the west side on a hill, the tower we sought squatted atop a cracked hill from which steam slowly wafted upwards, shrouding the sky in a great conidal shape. The tower was made of silvery metal and great slabs of glassy black stone and windows of clear crystal with shutters closed tight on the inside. Ancient Blackmoorian runes surrounded the top, large enough to see for hundreds of feet, and there was a battered sign of black metal with the same runes and some more, near the front door.
I carefully copied down the runes; I'd seen them before but forgotten them all from last time.
"So you couldn't get the door open?" Dash said.
"Yes. It has some super-complex set of wards on it," I told her.
She flew down to the door, pegasi following and studied the huge double doors, made of white metal with golden runes.
"It doesn't look locked," she said.
"Well, it totally defeated my magic, Ivan's skills and Helga's strength. I am hoping the lockpicks can open it."
She hooked a hoof into the door handles and pulled the door open. "No, wait, I..." I began.
I paused.
"WHAT?" I said in confusion.
"Man, I bet we could loot this place right now," Rainbow Dash said.
If Rarity wasn't the best pony, Rainbow Dash would definitely be.
"I think we'd best get the others, as they won't appreciate not getting a cut," I told her. "Also, there may be things that opening a door won't stop inside."
HOW THE HELL DID SHE JUST OPEN THE DOOR?
"Good point. We do have the other pegasi, though," she said, clearly reluctant to turn back.
"I think we should report in, having accomplished the mission," one of the pegasi said. His name was Arcing Turn and he was green coated and pink maned. He had a big earring on his left ear which I could tell was magical. But not what it did.
Dash sighed. "Okay, then let's take off."
We headed back to the ship to see the others and I prayed the rest of this would go so smoothly. (And I had Dash close the door and open it twice to make sure she could keep doing it. Since she could, we left it closed. Might as well not make our foes' life easier.)
*************
"Okay, if I am translating this right, the first repeating motif is 'Shadrakal Biological Research Corporation'," Twilight said. "The second motif is 'Better Living Through Techno-Magical Biology' and the third is 'Equine Research Facility'."
Lunette made a noise and we all turned to look. She licked her lips. "This is one of the facilities where the Blackmoorians made us what we are today," she said softly.
An utter silence descended on the room.
"I had thought them all destroyed. I don't even know how this one got here as they were, I thought, all buried under the ice at the poles." When the Blackmoorians blew themselves up, the planetary axis shifted and now the heartland of Blackmoor is under the polar ice.
"That must be why I could open it," Dash said hesitantly.
"I would think they'd want to keep the ponies under control," I said, frowning.
"Perhaps the Element of Harmony you have enabled you to open it, Dash," Twilight said.
"That makes sense," Dash said.
"Okay, we'll hide and watch Marquetta's base," Lunetta said. "Your group will enter this place and check it out. If the Elements of Power come there, we'll break in and rescue the Radhirajah. If you finish exploring before they notice us, then we'll work out a way to lure them to the place."
"They have to know this place exists if 'Sammy' has my memories and 'Niccolo' has Ivan's," I said. "They may already have looted it."
"We'll approach cautiously," Twilight said.
"Hold on, I have an idea," Sweetie said, getting her cards. "Let me try a card divination."
Twilight nodded and Sweetie's friends crowded around her to watch.
She shuffled the deck with her magic, looking proud of herself. Then Sweetie had Dash put a hoof on the deck while she concentrated. Then Sweetie waved her forehooves over it and tapped the deck with her horn.
Seven cards dealt themselves out and Sweetie concentrated. They were a mixture of Stones and Flames with one Waves card. Sweetie studied them. "A wizard of great power moved it," she said. "Many years ago. He wanted to use it as a base. But I don't know what happened to him."
Great, we're likely to have some MAD WIZARD. Or his lich. Or some other crazy thing.
"Ooh, maybe he's a demi-lich and we can use him to power the death ray!" Scootaloo said.
` PLEASE NO.
"Good job, Sweetie," Captain Keen Eyes said proudly to her. "You will be a great diviner one day."
"Thanks, Daddy," she said, snuggling up to him happily.
Well, at least we have a little more to work with. And please, no more MAD WIZARDS.
We now laid our plans and headed out.
*****************
Captain Keen Eyes spread his men out to guard the entrance. I fear the Elements of Power will roll them over if they come but he insisted. He glared at me, then said to Rarity, "Be careful."
She embraced him around his neck. "I will, father. I will go, knowing I am safe with you guarding me."
He looked a little embarrassed.
As we approached the building, Twilight's eyes widened. "An Immortal of Matter touched this building."
"To keep out non-Ponies?" Ivan said. "I get the same reading."
They both had the amulet and ring Luna had given them respectively.
A little experimenting showed Ivan and any of the ponies could open it except Rarity, who frowned. And I couldn't open it. "But Ivan couldn't open it last time," I said. "I'm thinking it must be because Rarity and I are human right now, but you're human too."
Fluttershy tried turning into a human; she could not open it either. So she then turned back. "Ivan doesn't even have a Cutie Mark or anything," she said, confused.
"Well, I'm not arguing," Ivan said.
"Asterius! He's a friend to our kind and he helped ponykind escape the fall of Blackmoor," Twilight said. "I bet he eventually learned of this place and sealed it. But since Ivan is chosen of Asterius, he can get in."
Ivan nodded. "That makes sense."
And into the place we went; the front area had crude paintings all over it of the glorious adventures of some wizard, showing his birth in a city of stone by a great river; he had darker skin than mine, though not as dark as a Tanagoro and black hair in long braids with beads woven into it. Black eye makeup exaggerated his eyes and he wore only rune tattoos, sandals, two golden forearm bracers and a short skirt of blue linen.
"Nithian!" Twilight said excitedly. "He is..." She got a book and consulted it. "Rathanhotep. Which means..." Page, page. "He Who Gives Praise to Rathanos," she said. "Who was a Nithian immortal of fire."
"So we can expect a hot time in the old town tonight?" Pinkie said.
Twilight and I cringed; no one else got it. It's really for the best that way.
"With great balls of fire!" Spike said, laughing. Then he breathed fire into the air.
The art showed Rathanhotep busy doing things like exploring frozen wastelands, fighting monsters, looting ancient ruined temples, battling other wizards and rebuilding this place. It was not very well executed except for the writing, which was all very precise and well done. It covered over art of humans in white coats and shirts and dark pants and ponies.
"Much as I hate to destroy a site of historical interest," I said, "We probably should erase this if we can to see what's under it."
Applejack studied the wall. "Dunno how we'd get the paint off without destroying the paint under it."
Rainbow Dash tried scraping with her hoof and both layers came off. "Yep."
Pinkie now got into an odd pose, sitting on her buttocks with her legs folded oddly in front of her, left foreleg outstretched and the other bent around to touch the side of her head. She began a strange chant.
"Pinkie, Ochelean meditation is unlikely to help us here," Twilight said. "Also, you are getting the chant wrong. It's 'long shal caro megu dashan', for the first verse, and then..."
"Shhh, meditating," Pinkie said, so we let her meditate. "I am the lotus, I demand caffieine and sugar, open the way of sweet enlightenment..."
Rarity ran her fingers across one of the crude paintings, then the original paintings. "I think I can carefully chisel down to the original art. But it will be tiring and so we should pick carefully."
We all wandered around, trying to figure out where to chisel. But then Applejack found something. A human hand holding an apple and you could see a pony's muzzle reaching out for it. The pony was red in color, probably female. "How about here?" she said.
A battle between Rathanhotep and a wizard named Menes was painted over the scene. Rarity got her needles and began slowly, delicately chipping away. I lent her my strength, feeling the incredible facility with which she worked. Bit by bit, the upper layer of paint flaked off, though she began to sweat.
The pony emerged from under it, colored like a modern pony, red with an apple green mane, and oddly familiar, though I couldn't tell why; the pony didn't look too much like any of my companions. There was writing in Blackmoorian. "Test Subject X45-C8: 'Jorla'," Twilight read off. "Class: Matter. Strength: Rank 3. Can pull 2.25 tons of weight. Intellect: Class Eight. Speech capable. Prehensile Tail. Understands Time and Consequences. Capable of Basic Abstract Thought. Farming Trained. Hard working and dependable. Comfortable with clothing and gear, but cannot dress self. Cost: 212 Decar."
A smiling human in a labcoat offered an apple to the eager pony Jorla; she was hitched to a plow with runes carved into it, glowing softly. She wore pony boots and a conical hat with brim; the company logo was on it.
"It's an advertisement, or maybe bragging about their success," Rarity said softly.
"Darnit, I have seen this pony before," Applejack said.
"It is by beans alone that I put my nose in motion," Pinkie chanted, nose twitching.
"Pinkie, are you doing something useful or just bored?" Rainbow Dash asked curiously.
"I am trying to remember if I know anything about this wizard from stories and legends," Pinkie said. "Also, trying to be funny."
"No one is getting the joke," Dash said ruefully.
"Not even Twilight?" Pinkie said, disappointed.
Twilight was busy translating more. "This man is named Doctor Devan Malekish."
Fluttershy began singing a little song, but nothing happened. "Oh dear, there's no mice or anything like that here."
"Probably nothing to eat," I said. "And how would they get in and out?"
"Unless they're undead mice, who starved to death here and their hunger turned them into the hungry dead, roaming and waiting for tasty, tasty ponies," Dash said with a spooky voice, advancing on Fluttershy. "Then they close in on her, and then they POUNCE!" She jumped on Fluttershy and they both rolled around laughing.
Ivan hit his forehead. "Ahah!"
Dash paused. "What?"
"Part of the Path of the Paragon is that you have to defeat seven wizards or similar types who live around your base. The greatest wizards. Note, only six paintings," Ivan said.
"So he probably died taking on the seventh," I said.
"I don't sense any immortal energies here, though," Twilight said.
"Well, anything he'd built up likely dissipated long ago," Ivan said. "But I bet he moved this here and hoped to transform the area to his vision, defeat his rivals, make a unique magic items and all that."
"The crown," I said. "Maybe that's what the crown was!"
"Crown?" Rarity said curiously, then leaned on me, tired.
I put an arm around her. "There was a magic crown. The map we lost said it was very powerful, but I don't know the details."
"That's Applejack's ancestor," Pinkie said, opening her eyes.
Applejack said, "Don't see much resemblance, even if she likes apples."
"Well, it's distant but remember in White Plume Mountain? Where we saw all those generations?" Pinkie said. "I think that's one of your ancestors."
Applejack shifted uncomfortably, and I can't blame her. "So she was an experiment," Applejack said, frowning. She put a hoof to the painting. It was so fresh looking; Rarity's work had been so precise. I'd felt her element working hard.
"Well, all your ancestors were," Ivan said. "Lizardmen were the same way, I think. And it wouldn't surprise me if someone monkeyed around with our ancestors."
Pinkie and Twilight and I all laughed and he sighed. "I'm serious!" Ivan said. "Don't laugh at me." He frowned.
"No, no, it's just humans are related to monkeys," Twilight said. "Wait, you didn't mean to make that joke?"
Ivan facepalmed and I laughed more until he put me in a headlock and we wrestled around.
"No, no, this is not a good time to fight for mating dominance!" Fluttershy said, trying to break us up.
"What?" Ivan said.
I started laughing again. Pinkie started laughing and Twilight fell down and just rolled around on the floor.
"Wait... oh," Applejack said, then laughed loudly.
"I do not get it," Dash said.
"Nor I," Rarity confessed. "Given Ivan and Marcus are unlikely to mate."
"I can tell what's on Fluttershy's mind," Applejack said, grinning.
"No, no it's just when men fight, it's usually over access to mates or hunting grounds," Fluttershy said.
"I'm not after Marcus' girlfriend, I'm just out to show him the error of his ways," Ivan said.
"Don't mind us," I said as we wrestled around. "You can finish checking things out in this room while we have this fight."
This fight Ivan was winning, dammit.
"So... are there paintings of all our ancestors here?" Dash said curiously.
"I would be surprised," Pinkie said. "But hey, I LIKE surprises."
"I had best conserve my strength; we can come back and try more if nothing turns out dangerous," Rarity said.
We were rolling around on the floor; I was trying to get my legs around Ivan's head, but he had me mostly pinned. This was not going well.
Erik would have won this, dammit.
Only one way to win.
CHEAT.
"Hey, look, it's Lunette naked," I whispered in his ear.
"I am not stupid enough to fall for that," he said and now definitely had me pinned.
Damnit, you fell for something equivalent the last time we did this.
Ivan triumphed and we now moved to begin exploring the rest of this floor.
**************
The rest of the ground floor had been used as lab space and had a crude sleeping area, all of it dusty and long ago rusted, busted and worn out. There were stairs up and down and an elevator which relied on long ago faded magic. So we took the stairs.
The doors at the top had a ward. But it was old and frayed and Twilight easily took it apart. Beyond was... a library. A huge library of Blackmoorian books. Twilight and I stared at it all as if we'd just found a mountain of gold.
There was an enchantment of book preservation here. "This is INCREDIBLE," Twilight said. "Look at all this! LOOK AT IT!"
"Books I can't read," Dash said, "Big whoop." She looked bored.
"Spike, we have to catalog this!" Twilight said, sounding like a junkie who just found a pile of opium the size of the Thyatian empire.
"Later, sugarcube, once we're sure everything is safe," Applejack said.
"This is the perfect bait. One HINT of these books and Sammy and Dawn Gleaming will come running if they have to wade through all the armies of the Five Fiends," I said. The Church of Karameikos identifies five immortals of Entropy, the Five Fiends, as its greatest foes.
"I'll take just one... how can I take JUST ONE?" Twilight said, staring at them.
Dash grabbed a book and threw it to her. "Here you go."
It flopped open to a picture of a grand gleaming metal bird made of silver with blue metal runes. It flew against... no, it WAS in space. You could see Mystara down below it in one corner. "The Beagle II, modelled on the crashed ship found near Blackmoor City in the reign of the blessed Uther I," Twilight translated the caption. "Shown on its first voyage to the Hashalta star system."
Now Dash looked at it enviously. "Wow, that would be awesome. I wonder how fast I could fly in space."
"There's no air, so it would be a problem for you," Twilight said.
"No air? How do stars burn?" Dash asked.
"They are six major theories," Twilight began.
"And you can explain them later, when we don't have to worry about the Elements of Power showin' up," Applejack said.
"The form is good but it needs decoration," Rarity said. "Hmm, though the lighting in space could change as you moved around." She drifted into a reverie.
"There are more important things than the paint job on a spaceship," Twilight said, waggling a hoof at her.
"If you can afford that much metal, you can afford a little decoration, darling," Rarity said. She looked at me.
I know that look.
"Style AND substance is better than just substance," I told Twilight. I put an arm around Rarity. "A perfect example," I said and she put an arm around me.
"Hey, guys, I found a trap!" Pinkie shouted from the next room.
Oh bloody hell.
We all started running but Ivan led the pack. Herd. Whatever.
"Man, look at those blades!" she shouted. "They're so clean and shiny!"
There was an odd squelching noise. "It cut my pie perfectly! Sweet! But I can't eat while it's trying to kill me!"
I felt my gut clench and we found a pie (on the floor) and a Pinkie Pie (bouncing around as six blades try to ginsu her in a small grey room with a pair of doors with some sort of odd rune-pad lock). She couldn't quite get out due to being in the middle of the blades and if she wasn't so nimble, she'd have been mincemeat pie by now.
Rarity fired an arrow, jamming the mechanism on one of the blades and Ivan jammed a spike into the swingtrack of another. Twilight bent three of them with her magic and Spike fried the last one.
"Pinkie, don't go wanderin' off on your own!" Applejack dressed her down. "You could get hurt!"
The thought of that made my gut curdle. Pinkie drives me crazy sometimes but seeing her die... mangled... I couldn't take that.
It's okay. We'll be okay. No panicking now. Not in front of my girlfriend. I have some pride.
Sometimes.
Shut up.
"I'm sorry, I couldn't get in enough to see the book so I took a look around," Pinkie said apologetically. "What's it guarding?"
Twilight studied the door. "Records room." Her eyes widened. "Ooooh."
"That's a crazy ass trap to put guarding your records," Applejack said, frowning.
"Well, this place has been moved and messed with," I said. I was kind of eager to see what was in the records room too.
Twilight, Ivan, Rarity and I studied the lock. "There must be a code which opens it," Twilight said.
"Just randomly jamming buttons won't get you a lucky right guess, by the way," Pinkie said. "In case you were wondering."
That explains that.
"It could be anything," Twilight said, frustrated.
Ivan took the Lockpicks of Asterius. "Let's see if this works," he said, then touched it to them and concentrated.
Buttons depressed themselves and one of the lockpick's jewels stopped glowing. He had five more jewels.
And then the door swung open and we stepped into the vault.
*************
The room was full of crystal balls on shelves, labelled. If you looked carefully, letters spilled around inside the ball. There were a half dozen stands on a table with chairs in the middle of the room. The air was very fresh and there was no dust at all, unlike everywhere else. Pinkie took great deep breaths and so did Applejack, then they both made happy noises.
Twilight studied the labels, then moved one onto the stand; it began to glow and images formed in the air over it.
A woman appeared with long blonde hair and brown eyes, her skin deeply tanned but probably naturally pale; she looked Anatalian to me. (The Anatalians live in Norwold, the Heldaan Freeholds, and the Northern Reaches. Tall, pale skinned and haired, strong, drunken, violent, fractious. When I was Erik, I looked Anatalian.) She wore a long white coat over a green shirt and black pants and brown boots. "Begin report 789-CA-81," Twilight said as the woman spoke. "I am Dr. Iricia Vals," she continued. "Something something pony something experiment."
I couldn't help but giggle and Twilight frowned.
"Shut up, Marcus," Spike said, frowning at me. "You can't do better."
"This generation demonstrates a great something of affection, at the price of a smaller size," Twilight said. "Something something growth something baby something watch."
A red coated pegasus with blond hair now flew down, and landed next to Dr. Iricia. It spoke in Blackmoorian.
"My name is Barrel Roll, and I love to fly," Twilight said for the pony. "Something something Dr. Iricia is my friend." The pony now hugged her and she looked embarrassed.
"Awwww," Dash and Fluttershy both said, then looked at each other. Fluttershy smiled brightly and Dash looked embarrassed.
"She ain't got no cutie mark but she must be as old as us. Or close," Applejack said, frowning.
"Ponies didn't get Cutie Marks until Celestia and Luna led them in revolt against the Orcs," Twilight said. "Aaargh, how do I rewind, we just missed some..."
Rarity, who had been silent to this point, now spoke, pointing to several glowing nodes on the stand. "One of these, I think."
The first one sent the record zooming forwards, but the next one sent it back. Twilight got back to the hug.
"Barrel Roll," Twilight said. The actual Blackmoorian word was 'Mante Kirish'. "Would you do some flying for us?"
Barrel Roll now went up and the view followed her as she flew high, then did a barrel roll and then flew down, then around the tower and back to Dr. Iricia. The landscape was totally different, a grassy field with corn growing in the distance and forest beyond that, the land gently rolling instead of a torn up wilderness tumbled by the ancient folly of Glantrian elves.
"Wow, this place has changed," Dash said. "Not bad, but clearly an amateur."
"Barrel Roll is of the first generation able to fly something without magical something; previous generations could only glide," Twilight said. "We hope to breed larger wings, allowing her descendents to carry more weight and something something something. Future Type Thought ponies will something something something."
"Her wings are the same size as mine," Dash said. "Did they fail?"
"I don't know. There may have been drawbacks," Twilight said.
The record continued with some more data and analysis of Barrel Roll flying and discussion of possible mates for her.
Then came discussion of another pegasus pony, a stallion named Hot Air who was a skilled weather manipulator and the possibilities this would open up for weather control and agriculture. I noted he was on the possibly mate list for Barrel Roll.
Then the record ended.
"They don't seem like bad people," Fluttershy said. "Or at least she isn't, and the other one was giving Jorla an apple."
Ivan had the not commenting face. I suspect I did too. I expect it's a case of where you can't help but love those you raise and yet the goal was to make ponies work for them. I don't know exactly how free they were.
"You know somethin'," Applejack said to Ivan flatly. "Spit it out or swallow."
Dash laughed and Ivan glared at her; she shut up. He sighed. "I expect some were nice and some were not. Raising these ponies probably triggered some paternal and maternal instinct. But in the end, they intended to sell them. Or at least their descendents," Ivan said. "Humans breed and sell animals all the time but they normally don't talk." He grimaced. "It bothers me."
"But without their wanting to do that, we wouldn't be here," Pinkie said softly, looking somber.
We all stood around uncomfortably, but then Pinkie said, "Sometimes life gives you lemons. That's when you have to go buy some sugar and flour and other stuff so you can make a lemon meringue pie!" She sounded determined to be cheerful.
"That's right," Fluttershy said. "Ponies breed some animals too. Like pigs. And we knew this all already." She spoke softly but firmly, then turned it up a notch. "Let's be grateful for the good, and forget the bad."
"You can't just forget the past," Twilight said. She sighed. "But dwelling on it too much isn't good either."
"We should check the last record," Spike said.
Twilight nodded. I was a little nervous about it.
I can smell incipient tragedy.
The sphere came out of its storage and into a reader.
"This is Dr. Iricia Morin," she said, but now she was an old woman with long gray hair in a pony-tail. She held a long carven staff in one hand, with gently pulsing runes. A staff of thunder and lightning. "This is my final report, if there's anyone left to report to. We have lost all communications with the rest of the province and snow has been falling for four days in the middle of summer. The pegasi have kept us snow-free but it's getting harder and harder. Worse, something something something beast-men something something coming. Dr. Moon's divinations show that the capital has been destroyed and fires burn across much of Blackmoor. Something something axis something shifted something something."
Dr. Moon came into sight. It was Asterius in a labcoat wearing glasses and a big black moustache. And a nice soft hat. When he spoke, we could understand him without translation. "Dr. Iricia, you have to go. The wards should hold the vault intact but it may be a very long time if ever before anyone watches this."
"Something something not be forgotten, something Barrel Roll."
Barrel Roll, also old with a mane turned grey and moving more slowly, now came into sight. She wore a crude spear rig. The spear was, in fact, clearly a sharpened table leg. "I'm ready," she said simply.
"Barrel Roll, you have to go," Dr. Moon said. "Your children and grandchildren need you."
"If you're not going, I am not going," Barrel Roll said stubbornly.
"Dr. Iricia," Dr. Moon began.
"My children are dead," she said softly. "Not that I ever paid them enough attention. Something something capital something dead."
"Dammit, Twilight, everytime you say something it is making me crazy," Dash said tensely.
"I can fight," Barrel Roll said. "I know what you all are going to do. Those of us too old to run are going with you."
"You will die," Dr. Iricia said, sounding guilty.
"If we slow the others down, they will die. I've had a long life," Barrel Roll said. "A good one with all my friends."
Dr. Moon looked quite pained. "Look, Dr. Iricia..."
"No," she said. "You must go with them and guide them. I am too old for this. I will sell my life for a very dear price," she said, looking at him and emphasizing sell and price. "They will find they cannot afford it."
"Do not be afraid," Dr. Moon said softly. "It is my principle that the worker is worthy of his hire. Your sacrifice will be rewarded. I will ensure they find a place of refuge."
"I... am I missing something?" Barrel Roll said.
"It's a human thing," Dr. Iricia said to her. "Let's go, then. Record out."
And it ended.
I was crying. We had a whole room of people openly crying (Fluttershy, Pinkie), trying to hide or suppress it (Dash, Applejack, Ivan, Spike), leaning on me and crying (Rarity), and looking somber (Twilight, me). I stroked Rarity's hair and held her close, until we all recovered.
"So what exactly were those two talking about?" Dash asked me.
"That was Asterius," I said. "Dr. Moon."
"No way," Dash said.
Applejack opened her mouth, shut it, sighed, then said, "It was Asterius. He helped our ancestors escape, remember?"
"But what about her?" Dash said. "Or whoever else they were going out with?"
"Forgotten," I told her. "Over time, details tend to be lost and forgotten."
"She died for them," Dash said urgently. "And they forgot her?" she sounded outraged.
Rarity now fumbled with the controls and called up Dr. Iricia. She fumbled some more and the image zoomed in; she was wearing a necklace. It shimmered and looked rather like Barrel Roll in tiny necklace form, flying. "It's the element of loyalty," she said softly.
"It looks totally different," Dash said, then touched her element and concentrated. It suddenly turned into a necklace of Barrel Roll for a few seconds, then back to normal. "No, you're right," she said softly. "So humans had them originally?"
"They're very ancient," Twilight said. "Possibly pre-dating humans."
And that is old.
"Older than the Carnifex?" Spike asked. The Carnifex were a race of huge reptillian humanoids who predate humanity; they lived at the time of the dinosaurs and fell in whatever catastrophe wiped out most of the dinosaurs. (Some dinosaurs survived somehow in odd corners of the world like the Thanegioth Archepelago.)
"I don't know," Twilight said. "But I guess she saw Barrel Roll as loyalty incarnate." She touched the turned off sphere for a moment. "Well, we could be here forever and I wouldn't mind spending a few days in here but we should make sure everything else is okay before we get locked in or something."
There were three more floors above ground and who knows what waits to eat us below.
Hopefully something with treasure, anyway.
"We should secure the library and records as much as we can; if this goes the way things usually do, this place is going to be on fire or turning into a volcano or flung into the Elemental Plane of Water by the time we are done," I said. "Keep enough bait for our foes but save most of it."
"I can't send all these books," Spike said.
"Load the bags, send the ones we can," I said. "Keep some as bait, but the rest, if we don't get them now, we won't have another chance, most likely."
So we all got to work.
***************
Dash was supposed to be storing the memory spheres, but I found her watching them instead. "You can't even understand what they're saying," I told her.
"I can sort of get it if I focus hard," she said.
"Oh come on, you can't speak Ancient Blackmoorian by pure force of will," I told her.
She started another one up. A brown haired man in a labcoat was trying to teach a brown coated, starry maned pony colt how to hammer nails into boards to build... a chair. I think. "This is Dr. Birei," Dash said. "He works with the earth ponies. His son was killed recently in one of the Davanian colonies, so he's thrown himself into his work to compensate."
The pony was trying to imitate him but it had to hold the hammer in its mouth and it was having a hard time hitting the board. "No, no, you have to hit it from the top down," Dash said as Dr. Birei spoke. "Stuff I can't get you need leverage."
She pointed to the colt. "His name is Mifka. I think it means 'Jumper'."
I could feel power SURGING through her element and into her brain. Damn, that's a lot of power.
"Mifka can't ever admit he's wrong," Dash said. I could see Mifka protesting and then he and Dr. Birei began yelling at each other and someone we couldn't see was telling them to calm down (or so Dash said).
Another pony came in, a stallion with a brown coat and a black mane. He looked like an older version of Mifka, but without the glittering stars in his mane. He began telling his son to do what Dr. Birei said, while his son protested he knows what to do. The father was named Midnight.
"Okay, you can but we have to get these stored. Spike doesn't think it's safe to teleport them, so we have to take as many as we can."
"I'm trying to figure out which ones are most essential," Dash said. "But there's so many. I could be here for days."
I thought about her element. "Close your eyes and let your element guide you," I told her. "This is in line with your element, so it should help you."
She closed her eyes and then drew upon her element. "I have to preserve these so they won't be forgotten. So their sacrifice won't be forgotten." She shimmered and... something. Dammit, I felt power and something was different and I couldn't tell what.
And then she guided me to find the most important ones, which she loaded onto a cloud she made. The power of her element was woven into it, strengthening it and it comfortably held many of the spheres.
"But where do we put this?"
"I will pass it to the pegasi and they can tow it back to the ship," Dash said. "We can load up the books on it too."
Soon it was on its way and we were ready to check out the higher levels of this place.
**************
The rest of the top of the tower had offices, long ago stripped of anything interesting, unfortunately. I did acquire something abandoned in a desk, a translucent card of blue crystal with runes; Twilight identified it as a personal identification item for a 'Dr. Yashti'; he was a middle aged man with a thin moustache but no beard.
One office was, for some reason, full of orc bones, stacked according to bone shape. They should have crumbled long ago and many did crumble when touched.
Now this meant going down underground. This was laboratory space; much of it long ago looted or converted to other purposes. Some of it had paintings slathered over the walls of Rathanhotep.
One room had a table with very fancy looking equipment arching over it, now utterly powerless, but clearly once a powerful magical device. Twilight studied it carefully. "You inserted fuel here," she said, pointing to a drawer. "Then it drew energy and let you manipulate the traits of unborn children in the womb to some degree, I think." She shivered. "Hugely abusable."
They all stared at it silently. Machines like this had helped make their kind what it is today. I can't even imagine how I would react to something like this. It kind of creeps me out even now.
Then Pinkie jumped into it and laid down on the table. "Make my future babies even cooler than me!" she said excitedly.
For a second, we all stared mindlessly, then Ivan made a gurgly noise and Twilight's eyes crossed and Spike's jaw dropped. Applejack grimaced and turned away and Fluttershy said, "Probably not wise."
Pinkie began hitting buttons and Rainbow Dash said softly, "Those are the scanner controls. It puts a picture of the baby on the wall over there. The manipulation controls are out of your reach on the other side."
How did she know that?
"You watched it used?" Twilight squeaked.
"Pinky, darling, you shouldn't make fun of it," Rarity said frowning. "It's... too serious."
"That's exactly WHY," Pinkie said. "Don't be afraid of it." Her voice was urgent. "This isn't something to be sad about. These people made us who we are. They're our fathers and mothers. And those aren't for sadness." Beat. "I wish they had told me they were hiding coolness from me a long time ago, though."
"They wanted to buy and sell us," Rarity said, frowning. "How could anyone do something like that? People aren't for sale."
"Slavery is a filthy thing," Ivan said. "We ought to just smash this thing up before someone can use it again."
"It has good uses too," Twilight said. "I doubt it even works after all this time."
"Slavers wouldn't die for their slaves," Dash said softly. "But the whole purpose of this place was to make ponies for sale." She stared at the floor. "I don't even... I'm not good at this kind of thing."
Pinkie looked frustrated. "Being gloomy doesn't help."
Fluttershy hugged Rainbow Dash, folding Dash in her wings. Now her serpent crawled out of her bag and 'hugged' Dash too, which I suspect may not have been as comforting as Slither hoped. "I love you, Dashie," she said softly. "Trust your heart."
"They didn't even get buried," Dash said, still staring at the floor, voice wobbling. "They just fell and the world changed and the ice buried them and they're all just lying there dead." Her voice was haunted. "And forgotten. Why were they forgotten?"
"It's been a very long time, and until Equestria was founded, Ponies didn't have any many chances to write things down and hold onto it," Twilight said, putting a hoof on Dash's shoulder. "Though I expect it's all in a book somewhere."
"Not unless Asterius wrote it," Ivan said. "He may not even remember, given it's been so long." He frowned. They're likely buried under snow pretty deep at this point, though. On the other hand, Rathanhotep dug this out of the ice and moved it here. A VERY long time ago, so likely the hole closed up.
"I have to find them, bury them, ensure they're not forgotten. Somehow," Dash said. "Am I going to be forgotten one day?" she said pained.
"I'm sure no one will ever forget your bravery and strength," Fluttershy said comfortingly.
We'll all be forgotten one day, I thought somberly, taking Rarity's hand. She comforted me by existing. "You saved the records, that will help," I told her. "Maybe you and Twilight could write a book together."
"No one could read a book Dash wrote," Spike said. "But she could dictate to me."
"I can write," Dash said angrily. "They need a monument. And a book. And... something. Something that will last." She paced in place agitatedly as Fluttershy embraced her.
"It's all so cold and unnatural," Applejack suddenly said gloomily. "Don't seem right that ponies got changed by a buncha machines and machine operators."
Pinkie pounced on her and began to tickle her, but Applejack didn't laugh and now Pinkie looked frustrated.
"Something that will last forever," Dash said agitatedly.
"Nothing lasts forever except the Immortals and sometimes not even then."
"Then I will have to become an Immortal," Dash said determinedly. "So that I can remember them. So that things... that people's sacrifices won't be forgotten. So they won't have lived in vain!"
Twilight's breath caught. Her lips moved wordlessly.
"It's not a thing easily embarked on. You've seen what it's done to me," I said somberly to Dash. Celestia will be pleased, though. "I don't want you to end up the mess I have."
"You're not a mess any more," Rarity said firmly. "That is a big commitment though, Dash."
"I need to know, who has worn this," Dash said, touching her Element. "What they did, who they helped, their great deeds, who they loved..." Her voice was urgent and she stopped shaking. She turned and looked intently at the machine. "We have to take this to Celestia. She'll know how to use it responsibly and not abuse its power."
"I think we ought to smash the damn thing up before someone tries to misuse it," Applejack said. "I trust Celestia but if ponies have this, eventually everyone will."
"I don't know if it can even be made to work anymore," I said.
"I think Dash is right," Twilight said.
"I'm with Applejack. Too much potential for abuse," Ivan said.
Rarity ran her fingers across it. "Such fine workmanship," she said softly. "Look how smooth these surfaces are, how well everything fits together. Our craftponies could learn lots of perfectly safe, unabusable things just from the metalworking, I think."
"I... I don't like it," Fluttershy said. "I think the Earth Mother would want me to get rid of it. It's not the natural way of breeding."
"I just want people to smile," Pinkie said. "I vote for whatever makes everyone happy." She sounded kind of lost.
"Moving this thing is going to be a pain," I said thoughtfully. If we leave it here long, I expect it will blow up.
"Is that a yes or a no vote?" Twilight asked me.
Oh fuck me, with Pinkie being depressed, I have the deciding vote.
I don't WANT to take sides on something I am not strongly convinced of either way.
"Can we actually take this thing?" I asked. "It's too big to fit through the mouth of a saddlebag."
"It'll fit real good if I kick it to bits," Applejack said, frowning at it.
"I bet Twilight and Rarity can disssemble it into smaller parts and make a... a chart to show how to fix it," Dash said. "They're smart like that."
"Thank you, Rainbow Dash," Rarity said proudly. "I was at the top of my class in school."
"Me too!" Twilight said excitedly. Spike laughed softly. Oh wait, he hasn't voted.
"What do you think, Spike?"
"That my aunt should never, ever be allowed to touch this thing."
I won't argue that.
He paused. "She's right behind me, isn't she," he said nervously.
"It's just me, Spike," Pinkie said quietly.
He now hugged her. "Cheer up," he said to her.
"Thanks, Spike," she said softly, embracing him clumsily.
"I don't like it. It's not natural," Applejack said.
"Because it means you're not natural," I said softly.
Applejack grimaced. "I kinda knew about this sort of thing but seein' it is different."
I know how she feels. I've been running from uncomfortable truths all my life. Hiding from my own past. My memories. Trying to just live in the now.
I can't let them do that. "If you destroy it, it would be a lie," I said and Applejack jumped. "You're the element of Honesty. Lie to yourself about this and you'll just spiral down into the pit like I did, running from my past. Because even if you pretend otherwise, the past is still there," I said. "Dash, are you really serious about this?"
"Yes," Dash said firmly. "I never... The past never seemed to matter to me. But seeing them... They were people. People. And people matter. They have to be remembered. This thing kind of creeps me out but it helped make us what we are today. All this stuff." She looked at Ivan. "That's why Asterius saved it for us, right?" she said.
"I... I'm not in constant contact," Ivan said. He grimaced at the machine. "We're all going to end up mutated or something, but..."
"You're not one to talk about lies, Marcus," Applejack said hotly.
"I know all about lies," I said. "I'm too good at them and I don't want you to end up like I did. If you destroy this, you're trying to lie to yourself about the past. You know the past can't be changed. We just remember it or run from it." I squeezed Rarity's hand. "No more running for me. Don't be like I was."
"You still owe me more service you know," she said.
"I know," I told her. "I'll be a long time making it up to you."
"Save it," Applejack said softly. "Marcus is right. I don't like it, but he's right." She looked at Dash. "Big ambition you've got there."
"I know," Dash said seriously.
"Gloom levels... stifling... can't speak... talking like...," Pinkie began.
Spike reached in her bag, got a pie and hit her in the face with it.
"Delicious sugar," she said urgently, then smiled a little. She swiped it up with her tongue while I stared at how long her tongue was, then she said, "Spike, you are the BEST dragon that ever was."
He laughed. "It was nothing you wouldn't do for me."
So she hit him in the face with a pie and they began rolling around, making a mess and laughing.
"Dash, did you see how to disassemble it?" Rarity asked Dash.
"No, just how to use it," Dash said. "This model has a thirty percent increase over the one they used on Barrel Roll's generation, though. In effectiveness. But it cost them an arm and a leg." She ambled over. "I'll help."
We got to work trying to quickly take the thing apart. There's a LOT more to be done here.
***************
Twilight sent Luna a letter and we stored the pieces in Dash's saddlebags. She normally doesn't carry much in them beyond food and one of those Belcadizian air mattresses, which she really likes.
Slither began to hiss as we headed towards a security door, massively coated in dust. It had another code lock.
"What is it, Slither?" Fluttershy asked him.
Snakey noises ensued.
"Oh dear, he's hungry and I didn't bring any mice," she said.
"He has to eat live meat, right?" Twilight said.
"Yes, or I could give him some of the fish jerky I brought for Marcus and Ivan," Fluttershy said.
"We'll probably find him something soon," I said. I hope.
The door was labelled in dusty hieroglyphs of Nithian style. Twilight studied them and consulted a book. 'TOO DANGEROUS FOR FURTHER EXPLORATION,' she read off the door.
"Well, next door," Fluttershy said quickly.
"Surely there ain't nothing alive after all this time," Applejack said. "On the other hand, ain't no point in shoving our head in a lion's mouth, neither."
"We'll come back to it," Twilight said. "We need to check this whole place out."
I am wondering if someone has stolen that crown.
"We haven't found the crown yet," Rarity said.
This is why we are a good pair.
Rarity paused.
"Ahah!" She concentrated and her horn glowed softly.
She led us through the mess of rooms and down a level to where the air was cool and moist. This was actually pony quarters, long ago looted of anything even comfortable, let alone valuable.
Until...
One of the rooms had a well-executed wall painting of twenty or so ponies of all three kinds, including the one's we'd seen and many others. Each was posed doing something distinctive, from farming to carpentry to message delivery. There was even a pony with a magical wand in her mouth, despite being a unicorn.
Applejack studied the farmer, still looking kind of somber. "And there's Barrel Roll," Dash said approvingly, studying her; she was carrying messages in pouches.
One of them actually appeared to be doctoring a human, which made Fluttershy blink, but now she studied that green and purple pony carefully.
Twilight touched the wand-bearer and now the painting began to move and talk, making Fluttershy jump in surprise. "She's talking about she knows ten spells and hopes to learn more," Twilight said softly. "Something about learning to make potions and powders. And how she can make a magic... something."
"Sandwich," Dash said.
"It can't be sandwich," Twilight said.
"I could totally go for a spell to make magic sandwiches," Spike said.
Me too.
Each of the ponies, a mix of mares and stallions, spoke with their own voice when touched and delivered a little spiel about what they liked to do and things they hoped to do in the future. They mentioned lots of names of people not present as well.
"I wonder what this was for," Spike said.
"Clients," I said. "Likely part of showing how well the project was going and the prospects for useful results."
Another reminder of why this place was made. Dash carefully touched each painting and listened intently, her Element glowing, murmering to herself, and then we moved on.
*************
"Wards, don't touch them," Twilight said when Pinkie reached for a door covered with runes and shapes. She slowly, carefully picked them apart, letting us into a laboratory room, covered with dust and full of reagents long ago dried up and gone bad, though some things were still good, like the bag of powdered amber or the small bag of rubies.
Spell books lined one wall on a bookshelf, and one stood open on a stand next to a summoning circle, a star inside a circle inside a square inside a circle. Candles, half melted and covered in dust, stood on electrum candlesticks which put them five feet off the ground.
"Don't touch the circle, Pinkie," Twilight said.
"I haven't even tried," she said.
"Yes, but you will, so don't," Twilight said.
"I can see a summoning circle and not touch it!" Pinkie said.
"Uh huh," Twilight said. "Not this time. Applejack, sit on Pinkie."
POUNCE!
I laughed and studied the books. Unfortunately, I am not very familiar with Nithian notation of spells.
Twilight busted out a book. "Hmm, he summoned a bone devil," she said. "Or was going to."
Bone devils are mid-ranking devils, which resemble a human skeleton with a scorpion tail. It's poisonous and they can terrify foes magically and tend to stab them with spears too.
I hope there's not one roaming around, especially since he would have been trapped in here A VERY LONG TIME and would likely be batshit insane.
"Wouldn't it have gone home by now?" Dash said.
"I hope so," Twilight said. "No one touch ANYTHING, until I say okay. Marcus, do you know much about summoning?"
"Not really," I said. "Fire is my best thing."
She sighed and nodded. "Spike, keep Pinkie off the summoning circle."
Pinkie and Applejack were rolling around, wrestling. Dash moved between them and the circle and Twilight now checked out everything carefully, removing wards. "This is a GREAT haul," she said excitedly. "There's a copy of the Menethoth Codex!"
"What, intact?" I said, stunned.
She made it fly around. "The whole thing! This is a great day for knowledge."
Rarity kneeled down by the summoning circle. "Twilight," she said.
"Yes?" Twilight said.
"This paint is fairly fresh."
Bloody hell.
"But there's dust on everything," Twilight said, frowning.
"Look at what good shape it's in," Rarity said, pointing. "No sign of lingering magic but it's been used."
Twilight frowned. "That's not good."
"So maybe there is a bone devil," Ivan said frowning.
"We haven't seen any sign of inhabitants, though," I said, frowning. "Maybe it's magical paint."
"I sense no magic," Rarity said.
"It could be hidden magic," I insisted.
She sighed. "I am a Unicorn, I can tell such things."
"The whole point of hiding the magic is so wizards and unicorns don't sense your hidden magic," I said. "Why else is there fresh paint with old dust on it?"
"Someone could put dust in the room to make it look unused," Dash said.
That's a paranoid person, I thought.
Rarity said, intently, "I am quite sure the paint is fresh and non-magical."
"You can't be sure of that," I said firmly back and we both stared at each other while everyone else shifted uncomfortably.
Finally, Twilight said, "There's no way to tell. We'll keep our eyes open. So let it go."
We both sagged a little and then she looked surprised at something. I said, "I do trust your judgement, dear, but something weird is going on here."
"I... yes," she said hesitantly, then pulled herself together. She took my hand and squeezed it. "I know you have reason to be paranoid about this kind of thing."
We continued on with me holding her right hand with my left and a sword in my right. That's dungeoneering with your ladyfriend for you.
**************
We found a room full of tattered, crumbling strips of cloth. It had once held endless racks of uniforms but now they were all falling apart and covered with dust. Rarity mourned their death.
She then touched her hat and disguised her outfit as the usual labcoat, blouse, skirt combination the female researchers favored. "In memory of the fallen," she said. "A pity we can't save any of the fabric. Being able to use some in a special outfit would be quite intriguing to scholars."
"I would love that," Twilight said. "Hmm, I wonder if I can maybe save some of this somehow..." She began studying it and consulting several of her books.
"I love costumes," Pinkie said, bouncing over and touching a strip of cloth, which crumbled. "I suppose there's no way to reverse time."
"There's a spell to stop time but it's so powerful it really wipes you out. We'd have to use time travel," Twilight said.
Pinkie began digging in her saddlebags. "I have something here..."
We all froze, staring at her.
She pulled out a small snowglobe and shook it with enthusiasm. A voice sang, o/~ if I could turn back time o/~.
We all watched and...
Nothing.
"This used to work when I was little," Pinkie mumbled, a touch embarrassed.
When you probably imagined it, I thought.
"I have an idea, but I don't know if it would work," Spike said.
Curiously, Twilight turned to Spike. "Go on?"
"My fire, I can burn something and then it is teleported and put back together at the target. Maybe you could somehow modify my flame so I could burn some of this and then reconstitute it all fixed?" he said hopefully, then glanced at Rarity.
"We can try to create a spell to modify your flame," Twilight said. "Rarity, I will need your help since I am not knowledgeable in fabrics."
They destroyed about half the cloth remains but soon, Rarity had a pile of cloth by the time they finished, though she now needed a break.
We sat down and ate; fruit and sandwiches and jerky for the humans. Watching Applejack eat an apple in a lazy, disinterested way was kind of disturbing. I wanted to do something to cheer her up. But how?
I would have to think about that, though I could see Fluttershy trying gently to cheer her up and Pinkie more boisterously. Pinkie looked worried. Given Pinkie's talents of making people laugh, I can see why.
We spent another hour poking around several levels of mostly trashed, empty rooms. Some of them had little clues about the past, but I had a feeling that other than the crown... if it is here... we'd hit the jackpot. At least it wasn't full of traps and death.
And then I heard something. "Down the stairs," I said as we approached more stairs down. "There's something down there." The stairs in this place all had adjacent ramps. Probably for the benefit of the ponies.
"I'll check it out," Ivan said, fading into the shadows.
A few minutes later, we heard him running up the stairs. "UNDEAD," he shouted.
Bloody hell. We could hear the stamp of heavy feet. Mummies. With Nithians, you know mummies are somehow involved.
We got into formation and Dash moved over the stairs, while Fluttershy tossed seeds and grew vines. When Ivan came into sight, Dash grabbed him, carrying him over the vines, which tangled the mummies as they came into sight. "There were three rooms full of them standing at attention," Ivan said.
THREE ROOMS OF MUMMIES.
Spike, Applejack, Ivan, Dash, and I formed the front line, fighting the lead wave as they got tangled up. Rarity and Pinkie shelled them with missile fire while Fluttershy tangled them with vines and Slither hid inside her bags. Touching a mummy can infect you with mummy rot, so Applejack was wearing her fighting boots and Dash... had to make do with some knit bags of Rarity's stuck over her hooves which I hoped would be enough. My sword easily hacked them open and Ivan did his best to hold his foes while Spike burned them. Twilight threw the fire spell I'd taught her, burning mummies several at a time.
And then behind us, there was moaning and chanting.
MORE MUMMIES; they'd come up the stairs!
Fluttershy turned and threw more seeds and more vines to slow them down and Twilight hurled fire while the rest of us meleed our foes. Pinkie now switched, getting out her giant foam hand and singing an improvised song to empower us.
o/~ You're not my mummy.
o/~ So don't get too chummy.
o/~ You may think you're hot,
o/~ But I don't like mummy rot!
I could feel her bardic magic at work, strengthening my arm, guiding Dash's kicks, speeding Ivan's dodging and heating up Spike's firey breath.
We were going to win this. Probably a few of us were going to need Fluttershy to do cure disease rites on us, but we could do it. I felt a confidence in my companions which was almost confusing.
I ought to be scared shitless, but I knew I could rely on them.
A mummy hit my sword hard, disarming me, but Rarity pierced both his eyes at once and he stumbled back; I dropped, took my sword, and gutted him, then gave her a thumbs up before I returned to stab another one as it came at Applejack. She nailed it in the stomach and it fell and I beheaded it.
We fought and fought and fought until we were all tired, and our foes fell in droves. Dash kept scratching herself... we need some boots for her like Applejack's. Or something. She's going to need a cure and I think my foot is itching.
Finally, we all sat down and Fluttershy did first aid on everyone, while Dash blew all the mummy dust away. "Why the hay were there all these mummies down there?" Applejack asked as Fluttershy worked on her.
"Probably his mummy army," Twilight said. "Once we get down, we can check the rooms."
Spike and Rarity gathered all the mummy jewelry. They'd all had rings or necklaces or tiaras or bracers. It was a pretty sweet haul, I have to say.
But maybe a little too easy.
"Any sign of a crown?" I asked hopefully.
"That map may have lied to us," Ivan said. "Wouldn't old man whatever his name is have worn his crown to go kill his enemies?"
"Well, maybe he was saving it for his ascension," I said. I don't know why I care about that crown, I guess... it's been something that has kept preying on my mind for years now.
I gave a happy sigh nonetheless. "It's like a dream come true," I said softly.
"Not finding the crown?" Dash said, confused.
"I've wanted into this place for years and here I am with a good group I can rely on," I told her. "I am the luckiest man in the world."
"By saying that, you ensure something is going to turn us all into dogs or something," Ivan said. "I'm just hoping this guy had a magic sword."
"He was a wizard. I wouldn't bank on it," I told him.
"I will make you a magic sword," Twilight said. "I have books on it. If Hammer Fall and I work together, we can do it. Once we go home."
"I feel weird," Dash said, scratching herself again.
"Come here, you probably have the first stages of mummy rot," Fluttershy said, worried.
"That's why we need you to clear the dust, so we don't all get it," Twilight said.
Fluttershy got Dash to lay down and prayed over her and sang. Pinkie now hugged Applejack. "Come on, brighten up."
Applejack stared at her boots. "Just dunno what to think."
"Thinking isn't your strong suit," Dash said.
Applejack did not take the bait and Dash sighed.
"I think if I dress you up pretty, it will cheer you up," Rarity said, sitting down by her.
Applejack looked up at her, looking haunted. Geez, it is not that big a deal, is it? Just about every species has been monkeyed with at some point in the past.
"I dunno what's fake and what's not," Applejack said. "Maybe you should."
"What's natural is you being happy, brave, and strong," Pinkie said firmly. "It doesn't matter what happened long ago, it's who you are right now."
Flutterhugs did not avail, either. She'd finished treating Dash and moved on to Applejack.
"Ugh, I am sore all over," Dash said.
"Better stretch out some, loosen your muscles," Applejack said to Fluttershy's leg as Fluttershy worked on her.
"I ca... oh, you mean Applejack," Fluttershy said.
Dash began doing stretches.
"Fluttershy, you're a druid. What is natural and what is not?" I asked her, hoping she would have sage words of wisdom for Applejack.
"Acting according to your nature," Fluttershy said. "Humans make tools, beavers build dams, wolves eat cute bunnies because they are MEAN," she said. "Bad, bad wolves who will have to be punished," she said firmly.
There was a hint of thunder in her eyes. But then she relaxed. "You being a farmer is your nature, Applejack."
"Yeah, but it seems like our nature wasn't very natural," Applejack said gloomily. "Like I was made to be a farmer."
"You were, it was your destiny," Dash said. "Like I was born to be the greatest racer ever and... that's it!" she said with sudden excitement.
What?" Twilight said to her.
"I'm going to build a... thing. A museum. For all of them. A giant monument, museum, monolith thing that will last forever and all those who were forgotten will be honored there." She kicked the wall in a series of blows, carving a letter into it. "Maybe carve it into the side of a mountain. Mountains endure, right?"
"If properly maintained," Pinkie said. "You'd need some earth ponies to keep it from eventually being worn away by water."
"Magic rock," Dash said. "I'll figure out something." She squirmed. "Damn, why am I so sore?"
"We did a lot of fighting, Dash. I'm kinda sore too," Applejack said. "It'll be fine." She sighed.
Applejack continued to be mopetastic, which frankly, felt rather unnatural. Finally, we got cleaned up and everyone was cured and aching-complaint edition Dash led the way down the stairs and ramp.
**************
"Normally, you build the monument to yourself," Ivan said. "But I think you'd make a great epic hero path person like me."
Ivan the epic hero just seems wrong to me not that I really have any room to complain.
Dash and Ivan were talking Immortality as we walked down a long hallway past a series of rooms which used to have mummies and unfortunately lacked an explanation of why. Two more rooms had bones and mummification equipment, along with a big book on making mummies.
However...
"Ooh, magic robes," Twilight said, as she and Rarity studied a set of golden and black robes hanging on a peg in the mummification room. Twilight picked them up with her magic and they changed into a form suitable for ponies.
Before anyone could stop her, Pinkie donned them and then reared. "I am the mighty Piehotep, Priestess of Isis! All shall worship me and DESPAIR!"
Even gloomy Applejack laughed at that.
"Some kind of protective magic," Twilight said.
"Maybe it protects you from mummy rot?" I suggested. "It would be logical to wear something like that when making monster mummies."
Dash made discomfort noises and stomped around the room, looking at the tools. "This looks like the stuff we used to dissect frogs in school."
Rarity made a face. "Do NOT remind me."
Applejack said, "It's just frogs. It's... okay, it's probably not natural for a pony to dissect a frog," she mumbled.
"Well, to make a mummy, you had to cut them open, remove the internal organs that rot easily, stuff them with spices and mystical ungents, then sew them back up and wrap them in the prepared bandages. Things like removing the brain through the nose," Twilight said.
Most of our group made noises at that and Fluttershy hid behind Ivan.
"Did they eat the organs?" Dash asked.
I grimaced. "Humans don't eat other humans. They put them in jars, right?"
"Yes," Twilight said.
Dash looked around. "Where did the organs go for all those mummies we fought?"
"Good question," I said.
Ivan began studying the room carefully with Fluttershy trailing along behind him.
Nothing.
Twilight said, "I think this is a robe of protection."
"I need a staff," Pinkie Pie said. "And an army of undead slaves!"
"Dr. Iricia had a staff," Dash said. "It's probably frozen under the ice with her." Streeeetch. "Going to have to make sure she got buried and the others too."
"We should probably give Dash the robes," Twilight said.
"Pinkie can have them," Dash said. "They'd get in the way of my wings."
"They should change to accomodate your body," Twilight told her. "And it will keep off mummy rot, among other things."
"Oh man," Dash said, but she let us dress her in the robes, which shifted shape to fit her. "Way too girly."
"It was originally worn by a man," I said.
"Well, he needed to dress more manly, like Soarin'," Dash said.
"Soarin' wears a unisex outfit also worn by female Wonderbolts," Twilight pointed out.
"He's a man's man!," Dash protested.
"He is quite manly, just not as manly as my Marcus," Rarity said, accomodatingly.
I put an arm around her. "And you are quite womanly my dear."
Kiss.
Applejack's sighing would have made me punch her if not for my own copious past whining, which inclined me to at least moderate my complaints.
So I kept my mouth shut and focused instead on exploration.
And listening to Dash complain about the robe. At least Fluttershy won't whine.
"Oh no, I stepped in something!" she said.
Ack.
****************
The next room down was full of organ jars, organized on shelves and bookcases with labels. There were a lot of empty shelves. "We'll come back for these and bury them so their souls can rest, later," Twilight said. "Leave them be for now."
The next door, Fluttershy said, "Stop," before anyone could open it.
"It's just another work lab," Twilight said, pointing to the inscription.
"Something TERRIBLE is inside," Fluttershy said. "A horribly unnatural creature."
"We have to neutralize it BEFORE we lure our foes in and we've checked everywhere else except the 'danger' area," Twilight said.
I wasn't getting any danger pings beyond the usual but I sometimes get blindsided.
"There's jewels inside," Rarity said. "Just mentioning it."
"Jewels," Spike said, drooling a little.
"I think it's a bad idea," Fluttershy said.
"Well, we ain't natural either. Might as well say hello to the freak of nature," Applejack muttered.
"I'm nervous but I don't want to leave this behind us," Twilight said.
"I am sure we can handle it," Rarity said firmly.
Or maybe you just want the treasure you can sense in there.
Not that I have ANY room to talk at all.
"Maybe it's the bone devil," Ivan said. "It may have been summoned and then used to guard the man's treasure."
"It must be bored as hay by now," Dash said. "Sitting in the same room for thousands of years? Man." She sounded horrified.
"Bone devils can summon more bone devils," I said. "So we would need to kill it hard and fast."
"Can the ones it summons summon more?" Dash asked.
"Yes," Twilight said.
"And then those summon more," Dash continued.
"Like Parasprites if they were six feet tall with a spear and a poison tail," Twilight said.
Dash grimaced. "Pinkie, get the music ready."
Pinkie's music rig was... huge. A bunch of instruments rigged together to play all at once. I don't know what it does, but I assume it's for disrupting summons. Can't argue with that.
What was inside was another trashed laboratory area, but at the far end of it was a huge metal cylinder with gems set into it. It was about the size of three kegs of alcohol stacked on top of each other. A half dozen wands stuck out of it and a WALL of magic hit us from it. Further, there was a crate next to it full of bricks of a shiny black stone, reminscent of obsidian except that iridescent rainbows of light bounced back and forth across the surfaces of each one. They felt like a WALL OF MAGIC too. Something was howling inside the cylinder; howling fit to wake the dead, though the door had somehow stopped this. Or maybe it sensed our arrival. Runes had been slathered all over it and it had a slot, clearly to insert the bricks, also covered with runes. There was a book open on the lab table.
Twilight studied the book and blanched. "He summoned the bone devil, trapped it in this device and drained off its magic, then let it refill, then drained it again... Eventually it makes a brick, which then gets stored in the box."
"It hasn't made many bricks," Pinkie said, frowning.
"It probably takes an awful lot of power," I said. "It may use a lot of the power keeping it contained."
"Or the brick making bit broke," Spike said.
Applejack said, "We need to let the poor thing out." She grimaced. "THIS is unnatural. I know that much."
"It is a BONE DEVIL," I said. "It will try to kill us all."
"It don't matter, nothing deserves that much torment," Applejack said.
Rarity grimaced as she listened to it. "I can't stand to leave something in pain like that."
Ivan said, "I'm with Marcus. This thing is going to blame us and try to kill us."
Pinkie shivered. "We have to try. Even if it does try to kill us, it's surely atoned for its sins by now."
I thought about how long this thing has been stuck in here and I grimaced myself. "I..."
Dash looked torn, but Fluttershy clearly didn't like the idea of leaving it in.
Spike opened his mouth, looked at me, grimaced, then said, "Marcus is right. This thing is pure evil and if we free it, it may kill a bunch of people."
"I can at least try to banish it," Twilight said. "But I can't bear to leave it in pain. AND," she said, now looking right at me determinedly. "If we leave it, you know it will somehow break free and take us from behind when we confront the Elements of Power. Right, Marcus?"
Hoist on my own damn petard.
"I owe you," I said. "So I will yield to you. You are our leader, Twilight." But I know this is going to be bad. But she's right about it breaking loose, dammit.
I know how this goes.
"Let's move the magic," Twilight said. "So it doesn't suck it all back up and become a Roaring Demon or something."
YES, let's get it somewhere SAFE.
We hauled it WAY upstairs to the library where there was hopefully no chance that the bone devil would somehow get it back during the inevitable fight. Twilight carefully put up anti-scrying and anti-teleport wards to try and keep it from teleporting up and snagging the stuff. I was wary about not keeping it closer, but closer meant the bone devil would INEVITABLY get hold of it. We also got Keen Eyes and his men to stand guard on it with just two Pegasi hidden outside to watch for trouble.
Okay, let us hope things go well.
*****************
Really, we ought to be able to take down a bone devil. I'm just paranoid it will somehow be all-powerful and destroy us all.
Or that it will blow up.
We were all in the hallway with the door open and Twilight had put up protective wards to contain any big booms. Then she reached in and poked a hole in the thing with magic.
At that very moment, a letter fell onto Twilight.
The thing inside howled with triumph. Energy surged out of it and formed into a Bone Devil, a nine foot tall humanoid skeleton with a bony scorpion tail and a spear made of bone. A wash of energy flooded out of the machine, tearing apart the teleport wards Twilight had put in the room. DAMMIT.
He reared up and...
Teleported away.
Twilight cursed in Nithian.
"Well, that was anti-climactic," Pinkie said.
"We had best make for the library and defend it," I said. "It may have just left but it may be able to sense all that magic somehow."
As we ran, Twilight read the letter. She said the Elements of Power were on their way here by flying carpet. We had maybe ten minutes by her estimate. She and the Ghostly Gang were going in for the rescue.
"How did they know?" Ivan said, frustrated.
"Possibly they somehow noticed us going in and waited a while to let us get worn down," I said.
There was an explosion. From the area which was sealed off. FUCK.
"Keep going! To the library! And we need to get the soldiers!" Twilight said.
"I will round them up!" Dash said, pouring on the speed and blazing ahead of us.
I could hear monsters rampaging; what the hell was in that sealed area? FUCK.
We reached the ground floor; Keen Eyes and his men were there. We began making plans for a stand as the clock kept ticking down.
AND I STILL HAVEN'T FOUND THE DAMN CROWN.
***************
Captain Keen Eyes and his men would have to hold the staircase / ramp up from the lower levels. The rest of us were going to go outside and deal with the Elements of Power, hiding ourselves. Magic and druid power quickly dug us a pit to hide in and grew plants over the top; we had collected the shielded magic bars and stashed some in everyone's saddlebags; something in my gut told me that SOMEONE would otherwise somehow get hold of them however we hid them.
At least the bone devil had not been able to find them.
We sent a message and waited for our foes to approach the place, while Fluttershy's new earthworm friends watched for our foes.
The good news was that our trap worked perfectly in terms of the Elements of Power not noticing us.
The bad news was that they cruised into the building at high speed, going by before we could pop out and say 'SURPRISE'.
Then we heard them crash and then the ROAR of monsters on the loose.
ACK.
We rose from our pit and rushed in. I prayed for no more disasters.
I know, I know, a foolish hope.
**************
It is the way my brain works that I suddenly realized we'd put the dissassembled gene splicer in the same bag as some of the bricks of magic.
FUCK.
Too late to do anything about it. Except scream.
We arrived just in time to see Keen Eyes and Clarity facing off, even as his men fought a tide of... is that a giant mobile broccoli with arms and firing lighting from its upper head?
The other Elements of Power stood ready but Keen Eyes and Clarity faced each other, him looking angry, her looking determined, arrows hovering in the air but not advancing. "Father, you can't win this fight!" she said.
"It doesn't matter. I have sworn to Celestia and Luna and I will do my duty to the end," he said somberly. "I am a man of honor. Much as I would rather flush Samus Marcus down a toilet, I have stayed my hand for that reason."
Bring it, I thought angrily.
One of the earth pony soldiers went down and I winced. The soldiers were good but not up to our level. The staircase constricting the flow of monsters was hurting the ability of foes to deploy but it also reduced the number of them who could fight too.
"The carpet," Twilight whispered to me and I nodded.
"You shouldn't resist the urge to flush him," Spikey said. "He's a loser."
"He's not nearly so cool as my dear Sammy," Dawn Gleaming said dreamily.
Applejack stared at Apple Blossom uncertainly. "She looks so relaxed, so comfortable with who she is," Applejack said softly.
"She's embraced what she is," Pinkie said. "I don't know how you'll talk her around. Pinkamena wishes she could be different, but doesn't believe she can. But I WILL get through to her."
She had her invisible friends with her, which is NOT going to help. On the other hand, hopefully, we actually outpower them as the originals.
Captain Keen Eyes twitched. Loudly, he said, "Samus Marcus is a worthless piece of dung, but I nonetheless must hold with my loyalty to the princesses. You've all been suckered by an evil dragon immortal." He held out a hoof to Clarity.
"Hey, it's our evil twins!" Niccolo said, pointing us out and laughing.
Then there was a HUGE surge of power and Marjorie appeared. DAMMIT. "I am not an evil dragon immortal, mortal fool," she said angrily. "Bow to me or be destroyed!"
Apple Blossom studied Applejack, then said, "Not so sure now of your own rightness? To be aware of your own limitations is the beginning of wisdom, Mistress Golden Glove always said."
"She was such a stuck-up bitch," Applejack said, frowning at a memory.
"Only to fillies who couldn't be bothered to work on good manners and philosophy," Apple Blossom said. "We eventually became good friends."
Applejack winced at that. "And what about the farm?"
"We have a ton of relatives who wanted it and it's not like Big Mac wanted to leave. He is happy with it and I am happy for him," Apple Blossom said. "So you know the truth of our origins. Which if you hadn't skipped so much school, you would have known already."
"I knew, it just was meaningless word gumbo until I had to see it," Applejack said, frowning and not able to look Apple Blossom in the eye.
"Which one of us is running from the truth now?" Apple Blossom said, now producing a glass and filling it with a pitcher held with her tail.
Applejack stared at the ground, grimacing.
"You ready for your beating?" Rainbow Crash said to Dash.
"BRING IT," Dash said confidently.
"I refuse," Captain Keen Eyes said, staring Marjorie in the eyes. He is either the bravest or the most crazy pony alive.
Or both. It can be both.
The one good thing? If she is HERE, she can't be in her base stopping Luna and the Ghostly Gang rescuing the Radhirajah. Which means even if we all die horribly, they can escape with him and prevent the war and then when I reincarnate, I can haul everyone's remains back to Celestia for raising from the dead.
Or at least reincarnating.
I had better not end up a carp or something.
Fluttershy was rocking on her hooves, eyes closed, concentrating on something. But I felt only very small amounts of magic. I left her alone; best not to ruin her plan by distracting her.
Rarity watched Clarity and Marjorie intently. "Father!" she said urgently. She started to move towards him but now Clarity confronted her, though Clarity looked very nervous.
"Stay back," Clarity said.
The battle continued; some monsters were down but the soldier ponies couldn't keep these things down forever, dammit.
And now I remembered... our foes have Fire Swallow and Cruisin'! DAMMIT.
Aaargh, we should have... well, Lyra, Bon-Bon and Ditzy aren't really warriors and the others are kids and... dammit.
This was SUPPOSED to involve us having all those soldiers as help.
"Come with me," Pinkie said urgently to Pinkamena, as she stood, her allies clustered around her. "We love you and want you to come home."
Pinkamena grimaced. "If Father cared about me, he'd be here, but I see he's left me to my own devices again."
Pinkie winced, but said, "He has duties you know."
"And they were always more important than me," she lashed out at Pinkie.
But Pinkie didn't give up easily. "Father loves you. He TOLD you," she said urgently, sounding a little jealous. "And Mother too."
Pinkamena looked pained, though her friends chimed in that Pinkie was lying. Why create imaginary friends who tell you that everyone else is terrible? You'd just isolate yourself more.
But I guess she couldn't help it.
Spike closed his eyes and looked determined.
I pointed at Sammy. "Stop looking at my girlfriend's chest! You have a girlfriend, dammit!"
"HEY," Dawn Gleaming said. "Don't look at her when you have me!"
Heh.
They began arguing and I felt stupidly good.
Everything was about to explode, though.
"I can do it," Fluttershy whispered to herself. "Just think of who I care for and I can keep control. Slither, guide me. Angel Bunny, give me your strength. Rarity, give me your grace. Dashie, give me your speed."
What is she going to do? Turn into... I tried to imagine an amalgam of all those and my imagination melted, even as Slither now coiled around her and whispered into her ear.
Spike now ran over and kissed Clarity, whose eyes widened and then Spikey got mad and then all three of them yelled at each other.
GO SPIKE!
Rarity now ran over to her father. Crap. I can't let her go alone but shoving myself in front of Marjorie for that stuck-up arrogant bastard's sake...
She wants me most of all. He pissed her off but she's after my sword and my head. He's only here because...
Dammit, I lived longer between deaths when my conscience spent all its time sleeping off hangovers like a conscience is supposed to!
I ran over and stood in front of Keen Eyes. Damn my legs. "I can't let you kill him," I said. Damn him for drawing her fire.
With me in the room so I have to do something about it.
"YOU," she said angrily. "Clarity!"
Clarity turned from her argument. "I am BUSY settling this little domestic spat! Can't it wait?"
For one moment, Marjorie stared in disbelief. "No! We are going to kill these two idiots. I will give you the honor of killing Samus Marcus and I will dispose of Keen Eyes so you don't have to fight him."
"I can't just let Father die! He didn't understand! Give him another chance!" Clarity said desperately.
"I..." Marjorie got an odd look on her face and seemed to be struggling. "I am a..." She mumbled, "Why do I feel like this?"
Rarity made a little noise. She gets it.
I could see Dawn Gleaming and Twilight busy arguing over something and smiled a little. Then I looked back at Marjorie. She may be Immortal, but I bet this is her first substantial venture as anything but a dragon body. She isn't used to what it does to your mind. She is in an Alicorn body and it's influencing how she thinks. She doesn't want to hurt her follower, Clarity. Not just because it would make Clarity harder to control but BECAUSE it would hurt her.
I think it scares her.
But I also think she's likely strong willed enough to over come it. Possibly by just focusing on eating me.
"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" she shouted at me.
Bingo.
FUCK ME.
"You stole what was mine and I am TAKING IT BACK!" she shouted.
Rarity readied her arrows, as did Captain Keen Eye, knowing what was coming. Horrified, Clarity readied hers.
And then Marjorie's horn grew much longer and she began to lunge at me.
And that's when a gold dragon pounced on her, wrapping her in its coils. She was big but it was much bigger and it had a pink ridge of scales down its back. Gold dragons have no wings, just many legs and a snakey body and a weirdly horsey head.
Where the hell did a gold dragon come from?
Okay, I really should NOT look a gold dragon in the mouth. HELL YEAH GOLD DRAGON!
They're basically the most powerful dragons in the world. It was about thirty five feet long with a thirty foot tail and it... was wearing a golden torc and the Element of Kindness.
FLUTTERDRAGON.
I didn't know druids could turn into DRAGONS.
Her element was pumping power so maybe it let her step across the line. "I won't let you hurt my friends!" Flutterdragon rumbled. It began chanting everyone's names over and over, very loudly.
This, however, was the cue for the riot to commence.
************
"You can't impress me that easily you know," Captain Keen Eyes said to me now.
I could probably die writhing on a pike and you wouldn't be impressed, yes.
"But I am putting my trust in you to protect Rarity while I help my men," he continued.
"Of course," I told him. And then we had to part because all hell had broken loose.
Hordes of freaky plant-men were coming up the stairs and Keen Eyes sent a barrage of arrows into them, taking a dozen of them down at once. Then he began collecting fallen arrows to rearm.
Sammy came at me now with his sword and we began to clash blade to blade; I tried to stick close to Rarity but this made it harder to fend off his attacks. Fortunately, he wasn't being backed up, and Twilight was now taking on Dawn Gleaming, forcing her to dodge lighting balls coming from all directions.
Rarity, meanwhile, was arrow duelling Clarity while Spike and Spikey rolled around, punching and wrestling and shouting about who saw Rarity / Clarity first.
"Man, you look SO GIRLY in that outfit," Crash mocked Dash, who looked quite irritated.
Dash pointed at the three enemy pegasi (who were not Dragonfly). "I am faster than ALL of you combined!"
"Bullshit! I am the Power of EXCELLENCE," Rainbow Crash said.
"I am the Power of SEXINESS," Cruisin' said and struck a pose.
For a moment, Dash stared, then she slapped herself and Fire Swallow laughed. "You want a race? We will kick your MISERABLE ASS."
"Hah! To the cloud over your base and back!" Dash said.
To the... ahahahah! Go get 'em, Dash!
"Fine! OFF WE GO!"
They zoomed off and I blessed Dash for showing some cunning. That's the way to do it.
HAVE FUN WITH THE GIANT BATTLESHIP, SUCKERS!!!!!
Pinkie was still wearing her musical instrument rig, not having had time to take it off. She now began setting a beat with her drum. "There is only one way to settle this! DANCEOFF!"
"Fine! We'll see who is the REAL bard around here!" Pinkamena grimly put on clogs, then began clog dancing as her four flunkies produced a cello, two violins and a viola and began playing. Pinkie played her drum and accompanied them as Pinkamena began to... sort of get down loudly.
"Behold the beauty of the sacred clog dance of Kagyar!," Sir Lintsalot proclaimed.
AHAHAHA.
Pinkie began to clog dance as well AND play her drum at the same time. No small feat. Her element glowed brightly as she laughed, dancing in unison with Pinkamena.
"You can't hide from me forever," Niccolo said, stalking around. "But you always were better at running than standing up to people."
Ivan slid out of the shadows and kicked Niccolo in the nuts.
"Except maybe for a sneaky..."
Ivan kicked Niccolo down and grappled him, not speaking.
"Hah! You have no ans...urrrrrggh!" Niccolo began getting twisted around.
HAH.
"Natural is a useless concept," Apple Blossom said to Applejack. "You can become whatever you want to be, if you stick to it. Elegance is not something you are born with, it is something acquired through hard work, patience, and practice. I have to constantly acquire new skills and learn the latest news and fashions. I look good through dedication and hard work. The secret is that I make it LOOK effortless and easy." She sipped her drink delicately. "But because I studied hard and didn't give up the first time I got homesick, I became the very avatar of Elegance."
Now Applejack looked even more lost and confused. Someone needed to step in and reinforce her, but I was too busy trying to not be stabbed to death, a necessary endeavour if I was to help anyone ever again.
Sorry, Applejack. As it stood, we were lucky Flutterdragon was keeping our foe busy.
Hopefully, she could hold off Majorie long enough to... oh crap, no one is fighting Dragonshy!
Lightning rained down on the soldiers; they scattered and the monsters erupted into the room.
FUCK!
**************
DITZY-VISION:
How do I always end up in the middle of all this kind of thing? And Dinky too!
I'm a bad mother.
That made me feel depressed.
Plus, everyone on the bridge of the Moonraker kept staring at me for some reason. They were all working very hard, but every so often, someone would glance at me, look embarrassed and turn away.
I'm used to it. It used to make me sad a lot but I finally got to where I accept that I just look different because of my eye problem and that's just the way it is. For my little girl, I can accept anything.
Carrot Top tells me it's not a good idea to put so many eggs in one basket, but I can't help it. She's my everything. For her, I can face anything and do anything.
I mean, there's other people dear to me too. Doctor Whooves, Carrot Top, my co-workers, and so on. But she has to be my main focus.
I don't focus easily, unfortunately. My brain is as wandering as my eyes, it seems like.
Lyra strode around the bridge like she owned it; she'd taken some of that candy and turned herself into a human again and was now busy touching things and swinging swords around DANGEROUSLY despite me reminding her that if she loses her grip, they're going to hit somepony.
If Lyra had a daughter, she'd probably trade her child for magic beans then forget and cook them into a stew. I don't get what Bon-Bon finds so attractive about her. But then, I used to go for guys like that.
The artistic types seem attractive when you're young and naive, always having adventures and making beautiful things.
And when they get bored of you, they move and you never see them again.
Stupid Ponet and his stupid paintings. I should never have been stupid enough to be his lady.
But then, I wouldn't have Dinky.
Aaargh.
Dinky was busy operating one of the monitor consoles. "Wind from the northwest, four knots," she announced. I felt so proud of her, helping to pilot this boat. Tree. Treehouse. Whatever it is.
Scootaloo proudly turned the wheel slightly, adjusting for wind changes to keep our position. Distantly, you could hear the rumble of earth ponies running in huge wheels to turn the propellers used for navigation and manuevering when the wind isn't suitable. The sails rumbled and adjusted.
I feel bad for her; you'd think all this would get her a cutie mark by now, but I guess that moment hasn't come. I won a bubble blowing contest, but I'm sure you've heard THAT story a thousand times from Dinky.
Or me.
Okay, I do still brag about it.
Sitting at another monitor station, trying to sound deep and serious, Twist said, "Rainbow Dash approaching."
"What do you mean Rainbow Dash approaching? She's in a dungeon miles away!" Apple Bloom said at her station. She was monitoring internal systems.
"It's her, but she's being chased by Rainbow Crash, Cruisin' and Fire Swallow," Twist said.
"Dinky, you stay here and DO NOT LEAVE THE BRIDGE," I said. I have to help Rainbow Dash, even though I'm not very good at fighting.
"Yes, mom," Dinky said on auto-pilot.
Scootaloo hit the death ray button but it still, thankfully, doesn't do anything.
"Sweetie, arm the wave motion cannon," Lyra said.
Sweetie nodded and hit several buttons. Huge noises of building power began to pulse; I could feel them and I don't even have a horn.
At least, I hope it's not indigestion.
"God Hand, Blue Spike, Carrot Muncher, bring the wave motion gun into position. Aim at them; I will sigal Dash to rise out of the shot," Lyra said, then began playing her harp and singing.
Bon-Bon now began putting on some sort of elaborate rig apparently intended to put a giant candycane on her back, poking over one shoulder.
I don't get it.
The crew all looked somewhat nervous. Given most of the weapons on this thing have not been properly tested, I really, really can't blame them.
"Don't worry," I said to God Hand, a muscular Earth pony in a pirate outfit. "I have confidence in Apple Bloom's work. She's a good kid." Actually, I am scared out of my mind but telling people to panic is unlikely to help.
For some reason, everyone relaxed at that.
I decided it best not to question things; Apple Bloom was smiling brightly.
I'd donned a pirate outfit myself. I now adjusted it carefully so it wouldn't snare me or the kerchief fall down over my eyes. That happened last Nightmare Night and I accidentally spiked the pumpkin juice and then half the kids in town got drunk and I was in trouble FOREVER.
I felt guilty too; Mothers have to be EXTRA responsible.
A timer binged. "The Wave Motion Gun is ready."
"Message sent," Lyra announced.
Dash suddenly cut upwards and Scootaloo hit the death ray button. This STILL did nothing but now the firing officers actually hit the fire controls for it.
WHOOM
WOOM WHOOM
WHOOM WHOOM WHOOM
WHHHOOOOMMMM WWWWHHHHOOOOMMMM WWWWWWHHHHHOOOOMMMMMM
And then the sound of waves hitting the shore echoed powerfully through the ship, the endless crash of waves on the shore. It was so comfortable and relaxing and we all made a happy sigh for three seconds.
Then Scootaloo said, "THAT WAS NOT A BIG BOOM!!!!"
"Look, there's not a major difference between naiads and dryads, right?" Apple Bloom said weakly.
"..." I derped even more than usual in shock.
Our foes rose, chasing Rainbow Dash.
"All gun positions, fire when ready," Lyra said. "Fire at will."
The lightning wands, fireball wands, fire hoses, arrow rigs and others opened up, forcing our foes to scatter. Rainbow Crash stayed on Dash's tail but now Dash bobbed and weaved through the hail of fire, trying to lure Crash into the shots. WOW, she is good.
"GO RAINBOW DASH! TRY TO KILL HER HARDER SO SHE CAN SHOW WE CAN'T!" Scootaloo shouted.
I think she's getting too worked up.
Fire Swallow dove for the engine room, while Cruisin' arched around to charge the bridge.
Lyra now jumped onto Bon-Bon's back. "The engine room!" she said. "Ditzy, I leave you in high command! We will save the engines!"
Bon-Bon took off with Lyra trying to share her back with the candy-cane rig. What actually happened was that Lyra's legs dragged on the ground and she barely stayed on and kept banging into the walls. "OWWW!!!!" she shouted as she reverberated out of sight.
"Twist, you drive! I have to help Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo shouted and bolted.
"No, come back!" I shouted but she was gone on her scooter.
Twist ran over and took the wheel, then wrenched us around so that the bridge now faced west, staving off Cruising for a short time as he circled. I began shouting orders as the men moved the weapons to fire at Cruisin'. Everyone kept calling me 'General Hooves'. I don't even know how the whole nickname got started. I think I must have been mistaken for someone else.
I wish the Doctor was here; he'd know what to do. But he went back to Ponyville to pout over being called my sidekick. He said it was to work on repairs and an invention but I know pouting when I see it.
I am a mother.
"Sweetie, I need you to predict his movements," I told her.
"He's coming to the bridge," she said soon after.
I KNEW THAT.
"What's his plan?"
Shuffle shuffle, cut deal.
"To seduce whoever is in charge," she said, then turned red.
"Hah," God Hand said. "He picked the wrong general to seduce."
I adjusted my kerchief and parrot. Stupid dead parrot keeps falling down but it's traditional.
I wish I was as confident as God Hand is for some reason. I mean, I don't know why he's so confident. I mainly have remained unseduced due to lack of attempts. I'd never had many boyfriends before Ponet and then he... he...
I hate him so much and I wish all his milk would GO BAD.
So there, I said it.
"Seal the hatches, raise the shields," I said.
Buttons where hit and metal shields slid into place. Apple Bloom clicked on the scrying panel so we could see out by scrying.
But then there was a polite knock on the hatch and I nearly opened it before I remembered it was CRUISIN'.
Stupid manners.
But then Dinky opened the hatch, having been trained by me too well to be polite and answer the door when I'm busy.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Cruisin' stepped in; four marines rushed him and he laid them out with a spinning storm. I moved between him and the children. "I can't let you pass." I said firmly. "Dinky, always ask who is there before you let strangers in the flying tree!"
"Sorry, mom," Dinky said, embarrassed.
"Young man, you are not invited and I am going to have to ask you to leave," I said sternly to him.
He flew over to me and hovered, showing off his fine body. I couldn't help but look at him. I'm still a woman, you know. He was so handsome. And he wanted me and we both knew it and it made me shiver.
"Fair lady, I could not stay away," he said, reaching out to me.
I tapped the side of my nose and Apple Bloom nodded. I hoped she remembered what that means.
"Yes, let's get... ice cream," I said, nodding meaningfully at Cruisin' as I took his hoof.
Apple Bloom began hitting buttons.
"Hey, I want ice cream!" Sweetie said.
"Later, dear, you're on bridge duty, but I have to see to our... guest." I tried to sound sultry but I suspect I sounded squeaky.
Then I led him out, down a staircase and out to wing C, Room PT. I led him in and struck a pose by the bed. He advanced eagerly.
Once I get him on the bed.
He pounced, I panicked and fell on the bed; it spun upside down and then right side back up, rotating over a pit trap with both of us on it and we both yelled as we flopped in and out of the pit trap, until finally we both fell into the pit. I threw up a haze of bubbles to blind him, knowing that I could see and he could not; he tried to fly out and I grappled his wings and let us fall down the chute, bouncing off the walls as he tried to get me off his back.
We hit a pile of mattresses at the bottom and bounced into a cage. He got free, tried to escape, hit the cage walls and the cage began moving along a track as blunted arrows shot at us; he couldn't dodge as he couldn't SEE and I could. So I flailed around dodging while he kept getting clobbered.
One of my hooves got stuck in the cage mesh somehow and I hung there like meat with him bouncing around, hitting the walls, hitting me and yelping, while I screamed instinctively.
Usually this causes the Doctor to come and save the day or somehow my screaming triggers events which save me. But this time I just banged around as the cage herked and jerked and now the firehoses opened up on us. I turned the ones coming at me into bubbles as much as I could. HAH!
Cruisin' couldn't focus enough to use his own pegasus powers over weather to try and manipulate the water, thankfully, and Apple Bloom kept him off balance. I assume she's running this, anyway.
I hope he passes out before I do or this is going to get uncomfortable.
Then I realized... I am CLEAN. I am getting a GREAT bath out of this.
My brain drifted away to imagine an automated bathhouse. Oooh, I bet we could reconfigure part of ELSIE to do this...
I let my brain begin drawing up plans while my body tried to avoid the usual beating.
************
MARCUS-O-VISION:
There was a kind of low-budget beholder among our foes; it only had five eye stalks and was kind of slow. Captain Keen Eyes blinded all its eyes at once and then it exploded for no reason, raining down red and green dust on many of the monsters, who began to writhe angrily.
What the hell?
I was too busy fighting round and round the floor with Sammy. He was good. Better than me, which should NOT be the case for a COPY. I had a better blade but with the whole 'no killing' thing, that didn't help much.
Dammit.
Nature may be red of fang and claw but ponies are not.
Also, killing another version of me would kind of creep me out, really. He, on the other hand, doesn't seem worried, which REALLY annoys me.
"So what's your secret origin, anyway?" I asked him.
"I exploded from the head of Ixion, because I was that awesome," he lied.
I hope.
"Oh come on, we both know that only worked once and only because everyone was drunk off their ass," I said.
"I left Belcadiz and met Dawn Gleaming, we fell in love, I settled down. Nothing really secret. I wish you'd stop stabbing me so I could set you on fire, though." He kept anticipating my attacks, dammit. Then he would counter-attack and force me back.
"Weren't you worried about Celestia killing you?"
"Only an idiot would think that," he said.
DAMN YOU.
I got aggressive, nailed his side, but he got me in return. Dammit. I do not need a wound.
Flutterdragon and Marjorie parted us by rolling right over our position as we both ran for cover; they crashed into a wall, dented it, and kept writhing around.
"I am the greatest wizard ever to... my hat!" Dawn Gleaming said as Twilight pulled her hat down over her face, then teleported next to her and kicked her. "Wizards do not kick!"
"I learned bucking from the best bucker in Equestria!" Twilight said.
Then a bunch of black tentacles grabbed her. "HEY!"
"While I was busy learning spells. Typical," Dawn Gleaming said. "You can't actually beat me with wizardry, so you resort to violence." She shook her head. "Sad."
"This IS violence!," Twilight said writhing. I wanted to help her, but I couldn't get to her. Being caught in your own spell has to be embarrassing, though.
"This. Is. WIZARDRY! AHAHAHAHAH!" Dawn Gleaming cackled.
"Twilight!" Applejack said, but Apple Blossom cut her off.
"We haven't finished our tea party," Apple Blossom said to Applejack. "And magic isn't natural, right? So why should you help a magician?"
"It's natural for unicorns," Applejack said, frowning.
"Because humans made it that way," Apple Blossom said, sipping her drink. "Would you like something to drink?"
"No thanks," Applejack said, though she sniffed the air and liked the smell of it. "I always did like Aunt Orange's Speculares, though." The Speculares is an orange-based drink from Specularum in Karameikos. It's become quite popular there and in Thyatis.
"Anyway, no farmer can afford to revere nature," Apple Blossom continued.
"Say what? You have to be in sync with nature," Applejack protested.
"The Everfree Forest and the rest of the world is nature. Don't you find that creepy?" she asked.
"Uhh, yeah," Applejack says. "What pony doesn't?"
"THAT is nature. You have hardly known nature at all. Everything in Equestria is managed, not natural. We determine the weather, the soil, everything. Why do you think your yields are so high? Some of it is natural to you as an Earth Pony. But if you lived in Karameikos, you'd have smaller yields. Nature is meant to be controlled, not surrendered to," Apple Blossom said. "You don't want to be natural, you want to control it, to make it feed you and yours and your friends and neighbors."
"Ain't nothing wrong with that!" Applejack said angrily. "What I do helps people!"
"I agree. My family sells food, after all. But it isn't natural. To be civilized, intelligent, that is the antithesis of nature. Nature is the dragon eating ponies because it is hungry, the wolf at the throat of the sheep, the poisonous plants trying to fend off predators. Predators like US. Remember, you may not eat meat but plants are alive too." Apple Blossom swirled her drink and finished it. "Nature is chaos, wild and untamed and dangerous and unlivable by civilized folk like us for long unless we tame it and change its nature. You aren't natural any more than I am."
Applejack clearly had no idea how to answer that.
"RELEASE ME, MORTAL!" Marjorie shouted; she and Flutterdragon sent the clogdancers scampering, though I noticed Pinkamena and Pinkie both worked the disruption into their routine. But poor Mr. Turnip...
"MY CABBAGES!" he shouted as his cart was crushed and his cabbages scattered. He began to cry and Pinkamena tried to comfort him by drawing him into the clog dance with her.
"I will get you more," she promised him urgently. "I know they matter so much to you."
As Pinkamena comforted Mr. Turnip, Spike and Spikey continued their brawl and Rarity and Clarity their arrow duel. Unfortunately, Dragonfly was now chasing Keen Eyes and the remaining soldiers around the room and here came the tide of angry monsters who just wanted to eat everyone.
Worse, Rarity was oblivious to the coming onslaught of a half dozen giant fungal puffballs bouncing along towards her, tossing spores every time they hit the ground; they were green and pink but I suspected they would do far worse than mess up her dress' dye job.
I turned and set them on fire, but this let Sammy knock me down and now he cast a spell and I got grabbed by those damn black tentacles. The burning fungi went crashing into everything and now the place began to catch fire.
Of course it caught fire.
Damn me.
I writhed and Rarity yelled angrily but she was too busy trading shots with Clarity to be able to help me and... okay, Keen Eyes was never going to actually come help me but if the whim had struck him, he was busy anyway. And Twilight was caught in the same damn spell as me.
How the hell does this copy get to be a better wizard than me AND a better swordsman, anyway?
Hopefully, this is where Don Diego bursts in and saves me.
A few screams from me later, it was clear that Don Diego was NOT coming to the rescue this time.
The tentacles got tighter and I cursed everything ever.
But not Rarity, as this isn't her fault.
DAMMIT.
And where the hell is IVAN? Stupid shadow tricks, thinks he's so big, GET ME OUT OF THIS.
****************
LYRA-O-VISION:
You know, this whole riding thing looks a lot easier than it is, though really the spear rig is in the way. I banged into a wall again.
"If you'd stayed a pony, you wouldn't keep hitting the wall," Bon-Bon said irritably.
She has me there, but I have a plan and I need HANDS for it.
It is a simple plan that simply MUST have hands.
However, my difficulties with riding are making me worry.
We reached the engine room before Fire Swallow; it consisted of a lot of complex machinery hooked to giant hamster wheels with earth ponies running to drive the engines. We now concealed ourselves and waited for Fire Swallow.
She now flew in and took a swig from a flask. Fire Swallow was about to spit fire on everything when I strummed my harp and cast Tasha's Irresistible Dance on her.
She is strong of flesh and weak of spirit and began to dance wildly. This is why I stayed in Bardic school despite my sometimes lazy nature.
BECAUSE I LOVE BEING A BARD.
"CHARGE!" I shouted.
As Fire Swallow did the Manehattan Shuffle, Bon-Bon knocked her down with her massive candycane spear; it struck hard as I knew it would, for she commands candy. Then I jumped on Fire Swallow and put my hands over her eyes, wrapping myself around her. When the spell wore off and she tried to rise, she couldn't see, and inside here, she had little room to maneuver.
The two of us grappled her over to where Apple Bloom told us to, then shoved her through a sliding panel into a chute down into trap city.
This is why I need a spell that creates magic hands. This form does have its uses.
Still, victory! I hugged Bon-Bon tightly. "You are the best girlfriend ever," I told her.
She blushed. "You too," she mumbled.
I also need to learn that enlarging spell before I ever try riding Bon-Bon again. Having my legs drag on the ground... not fun.
I hope Dash can... hah, of course Dash can handle Crash. Easy wins for us, I think.
Other than my aching butt.
************
Marcus-O-Vision:
So... I was getting my ass kicked by Twilight's tentacle spell which apparently Dawn Gleaming had taught Sammy but which I have been unable to master. He was busy laughing at me which really pissed me off.
Unfortunately, a surge of fighting spirit does not, in fact, make me more powerful. If anything, it just makes me more frustrated that I am getting my ass kicked by a clone. Or an alternate universe me or whatever exactly the Elements of Power and hangers-on are.
Wait a second. I have an artifact sword. It must do things beyond just hack people and shapeshift, right? I couldn't swing it with my arms pinned but I still had it.
"SWORD! DO SOMETHING! ANYTHING!" I shouted.
Sammy kept laughing as I got crushed.
I got flashes of past lives. Mining for gems deep beneath the earth with my friends. Kissing Dona Carlotta. Sailing off to the Isle of Dread with my party. Freeing my friends in Alphatia. Ivan, Helga, and I drunk off our ass in Glantri City and tearing up a bar for no good reason. Man, that bartender flung so much lightning at us.
However, heartwarming images of good times with those I care about was NOT going to get me out of these tentacles. I don't gain miraculous power from being reminded of my friends, unlike some people. And I can flashback under my own power, anyway. Even when I don't want to.
Of course, I now had a COMPLETE FLASHBACK. Dammit, I need lightning or fire, not MEMORIES!
****************
FLASHBACK-O-VISION:
"See, I know someone who is a really good athlete," Rainbow Dash began.
"I'm sure Applejack would be happy to help you improve your skills," I told her.
"..."
It was pretty obvious, really.
"See, she c..." Rainbow Dash looked at me, then sighed. "We never did quite settle which one of us is the better athlete."
"A good rivalry helps you both improve," I told her. "Anyway, I'm not a specialist like you ponies, so I have to be flexible and find ways to turn weaknesses on people because I never win head-to-head. Even at cards, which I'm good at, I have to outthink people to win."
"Doesn't that mean you're a specialist at out-thinking people?" Rainbow Dash said, grinning.
"I..."
Okay, she has me there.
"I never thought of it like that. Thanks, Rainbow Dash." I couldn't help smiling a little.
**************
BACK TO REALITY FOR MARCUS:
Dammit, that's not even something that happened very long ago! If I have to waste time while being crushed on that...
I saw Captain Keen Eyes get smacked by a huge red-furred bear with vines growing all around it. The vines now grabbed him, raising him up.
And of course his daughters are too busy fighting each other to save him.
I felt my brain smack itself. "Clarity!" I shouted. "Are you going to waste time while your father gets eaten on a duel you know you can't win?" Actually, I couldn't tell who was going to win.
Rarity and Clarity both saw their father now and they both got very angry looking. Then arrows rained down on the bear, which crumbled into a mass of vines. WHAT?
Then they both ran over to him and began shelling the various monsters who were busy whipping the soldier pegasi.
This was good for them...
BUT I WAS STILL BEING CRUSHED.
DAMMIT!
**************
Rainbow Dash's 20% Cooler Point of View:
I'm faster, but I have to say that Rainbow Crash manuevers like crazy. We zigged and zagged through the branches of the tree, trying to get the upper hand on each other, while various weapons tried to shoot her and sometimes nearly hit me. We both crashed into bits of tree; somehow she'd shrunk a little relative to me, giving her more room to manuever, but it wasn't enough.
Distantly, I could hear Ditzy yelling about how that stain would never come out and Cruisin' making pained noises.
Don't know.
Don't WANT to know.
And then I saw Scootaloo come rushing out onto a branch on her scooter; she no doubt wants to help me. Now I have to fight this idiot and protect her at the same time.
"Scootaloo, you are supposed to be driving the ship!" I shouted.
"How am I supposed to drive this thing if the death ray doesn't work and the wave motion cannon only makes ocean noises?" she shouted.
Okay, those are problems, but I still need her out of here.
I whacked my head on a branch. I'm too big... we're both too big to manuever well at much speed in these branches. I could see Crash ram headfirst into a tangle of branches and now was covered in sap and bits of wood.
"Hah, you suck!" I shouted back at her.
Then *I* hit a tangle and now we were both a mess.
Scootaloo was zipping around, positioning herself ahead of us. Because she is crazy. I know how she feels but courting suicide is not a way to get a cutie mark.
Shut up!
*I* knew what I was doing.
"Pass me to port!" Scootaloo shouted.
What the hell does that mean? Isn't a port where ships dock and dump their passengers and goods and take on passengers and goods? Like Manehattan or Baltimare.
Her pirate costume must be warping her mind or something.
But I could certainly pass her. "Take cover! This is a fight for adults!" I shouted.
My Element began to pulse, trying to tell me something.
But I had no clue how to interpret it. It was getting stronger and stronger as I got closer to Scootaloo. The signal, that is. She was glowing. But seemed unaware of it. Crash either couldn't tell or couldn't care or possibly is just too stupid to realize a glow might MEAN something.
She's going to do something insane because she wants to help me.
I suddenly was keenly aware as never before of how much she admires me and looks up to me and wishes she WAS me. I was like that with the Wonderbolts as a kid.
But I didn't get to be around my heroines and heroes when I was a kid. So it never got this intense.
She annoys me sometimes; she wants to hang out but she can't actually DO any of the things I do for fun. But despite me blowing her off all the time, she admires me anyway.
I don't even understand why. Okay, I am cool, but none of the other pegasi kids in town like me THIS much. I'd think it was a crush but she's too young and I can tell it's not. It's loyalty and I don't even know why.
I ought to know why.
I suddenly felt guilty. Which I *hate*. Guilt sucks.
Okay, I'll do this for her. Guide me, Element.
Port is her left. Why? Why not just say left?
I flew close by her to her left. Rainbow Crash chased after me, intent on catching up. And then Scootaloo jumped on her.
"..."
"You crazy kid, what are you doing?" Rainbow Crash yelled.
Scootaloo wrapped herself around Rainbow Crash and leaned. The weight forced Rainbow Crash to arc leftwards and downwards and pretty soon, Scootaloo steered her right out of the tree and across the line of fire of the tree's weapons. Crash dodged them but she got clipped several times and Scootaloo was laughing like a maniac.
I followed after them, worried that Scootaloo was going to get herself fried; she was in the zone, that state of mind where nothing exists but you and your immediate surroundings and actions. I go into the zone all the time and it usually ends with me stuck into a tree or buried under a house.
What used to be a house, anyway.
We plunged through the clouds as Rainbow Crash spun, trying to throw Scootaloo off. But stubbornly, she clung and with a pony body, you can't actually reach someone on your back with your legs. All you can do is buck them. But Scootaloo would not be bucked. Instead, she chivvied Rainbow Crash down and down, faster and faster, until she was zooming at blazing speed towards... the front gates of Marjorie's fortress, set into the cliff surrounding the huge swampy troll-riddled depression known as Trollhattan (according to Marcus and Twilight).
Trolls were watching us, in fact, as we blazed towards the fortress. They looked confused. I'd be confused too if I didn't know Scootaloo. I flew up alongside them. "Scootaloo, you're going to be squashed flat if you keep riding this fool!"
"I'm going to make her go fast enough to do a Sonic Rainboom and blow it open, so we can storm the place!" Scootaloo shouted. "Don't worry! I know what I'm doing!"
"Sonic Rainbooms are MYTHS," Rainbow Crash said. "I tried so hard and I could never do it! Grow up, kid! I'm the fastest flyer in Equestria and I can't do it!" She tried to pull up but Scootaloo forced her to stay on course. "We're both going to die if you don't let me pull up!"
"Wow, you're a really bad copy of Rainbow Dash if you don't have any confidence in yourself," Scootaloo said. She sounded pretty disappointed. "And you SAW Rainbow Dash do one!"
"It had to be a trick!" Rainbow Crash said stubbornly.
Wow, evil-me is a real blockhead. "It's TOTALLY real," I told her. "I kicked your god's ass with it!"
"If by kicked her ass, you mean she's off kicking your friends' ass right now," Rainbow Crash said angrily. "Kid, get off me!"
We were running out of time as the front wall got ever closer. People were shooting arrows at us through slits in the walls but the winds around us deflected the arrows.
Scootaloo got this look.
It's hard to describe but basically, it scared me. A lot. It was an evil schemer look.
She pushed and suddenly, instead of heading for the fortress, Crash plunged downwards towards the swamp. "You idiot!" she said, struggling to pull upwards
I tried to force her up. "Scootaloo, don't be crazy!" I shouted.
"I HAVE A PLAN!" she said, laughing maniacally.
Ack.
We nearly slammed into the ground but suddenly, just before we would have hit, Scootaloo stopped pushing; we now arched upwards but the shifts in air pressure sucked a bunch of trolls off the ground and up into the air, tumbling them along in our wake.
Further, Crash now went EVEN FASTER as Scootaloo kicked her. "I can't do it! We are going to DIE!" Crash shouted.
"You can do it! A copy of Rainbow Dash is STILL Rainbow Dash! You just have to WANT IT," Scootaloo said.
"I'm a master of manuevers but you won't let me manuever!" Rainbow Crash shouted.
"If you don't do it, you'll be crushed and your Princess Marjorie will go down before Rainbow Dash and her friends and you'll have failed her! Do you want that?" Scootaloo shouted. "Do you want to be the one who can't keep up with the others?" She sounded pretty pained. Her wings were flapping like crazy. "Who they can't count on to carry their own weight?"
Scootaloo... I suddenly felt terrible for her. All her friends have cutie marks and are doing incredible things and she can't even fly unless she rides on someone.
"Scootaloo," I said. "Two evil Wonderbolts are attacking the ship. We have to finish this fast or all your friends will be in grave danger if we don't help them. They're counting on you to deal with this. I'm counting on you."
I'm about to take a huge risk. All three of us may well be crushed flat if Scootaloo doesn't rise to the occassion. But she believes in me. And I'm going to believe in her.
I felt a surge of power from my Element and I grew more confident.
"I can do it!" Scootaloo said, smiling brightly and looking utterly determined. Her wings began to beat with an absolutely ferocious speed. That has got to hurt, but she didn't care.
"If I do this, I'm going to level Princess Marjorie's fortress and she'll be pissed even if I do survive to save her!" Rainbow Crash shouted at me as the wind rushed around us.
And that's when I saw the Dragonflies coming in from the North, across the mountains and badlands of the brokenlands. Not the fake Fluttershy. Those insectile flying ships that the Glantrians use. Coming to rob Marjorie's fortress while she's distracted, no doubt. They're flying... some flag. Which has NO significance to me whatsoever, but I assume is Glantrian.
But then they arced upwards towards the clouds.
Towards the Moonraker.
They must want it for themselves.
Which I can understand. It's pretty awesome and they could probably beat the hell out of their enemies with it.
And who's it got to defend it? Lyra, Bon-Bon, Ditzy, some kids, and a handful of soldiers.
And a death ray that doesn't work.
"Crash! The Glantrians are after the kids!"
"What?" she said, then looked. Scootaloo made a noise. "Why did you idiots let the kids come out on this mission, anyway?"
"It wasn't MY idea!" I shouted. "Pull up! We have to stop them!"
"I can't pull up because this kid wants me to..."
It was, in fact, too late to pull up. Even I wasn't going to be able to pull up. Too much yakking, too much accelerating, our only choice is for me to push it and to try to level the fortress enough they could fly through the wreckage.
Except Pinkie's family, Luna, and the Radhirajah may be in there.
FUCK.
"You can do it! Trust me!" Scootaloo practically begged Rainbow Crash. "We can do it together!"
No time to think.
"Do it," Rainbow Crash said, surprising me with the urgency of her voice.
"Grab on and help!" Scootaloo said and I tangled my legs with Crash, effectively turning us into a triple-winged pegasus.
And then the power of my Element flowed through us all.
Here's the thing. With one set of wings, you can only do so much to pull out of a dive.
But with THREE sets, that's another story. I pushed up, Crash pulled up, and Scootaloo threw her weight back and realigned her wings, giving the final push that tipped us from 'DEATH' to 'AWESOME SAVE'. At the last minute, we pulled up and shot up the wall of the fortress, trailing a rainbow. We also flung all those trolls into the front gates, which collapsed. The trolls were squashed flat, but being TROLLS, they began to heal and soon peeled themselves off the doors and ran amok.
Because this is what trolls do best.
"Sweet Heavens," Rainbow Crash said. Rainbow light was whipping around us, forming into a great spinning cone, a giant drill of multi-colored energy, not just my usual colors but with Scootaloo's colors worked into it as well. She stared, eyes wide and then she laughed for joy.
"Good job, Scootaloo," I told her. "You saved us. Like I knew you would."
As we zoomed up towards the dragonflies, Scootaloo began to glow, and her wings suddenly grew larger and stronger and her flank shone like the sun and on it was a ship's wheel made out of rainbow. She flapped them more powerfully and we sped up and the rainbow spun faster around us.
The ships opened fire on us, though many of them were vanishing into the clouds. Dammit. But we hit the rest of them, rushing through their midst and flinging them like tenpins, our rainbow wake smashing them apart.
Some of the crews took to the air with magic or even sprouted wings and a few were pegasi who then saved others.
But a bunch of them were falling to their deaths now.
DAMMIT.
"Split up and save them!" Scootaloo shouted.
"They're going to try and kill your friends!" Crash said, baffled.
"We can't let people die!" she said. "Even if they need a spanking!"
So we split, blazing off to save them and Scootaloo took flight and as she flew, she laughed and so did I.
I hope the kids can handle the rest, though, as this is going to take us a while.
Even at my speeds.
******************
Marcus-O-Vision:
Pinkamena, Pinkie, Sir Lintsalot, Madame LeFlour, Mr. Turnip and Rocky went clog-dancing past me, having forgotten it was a contest and just enjoying themselves.
All well and good EXCEPT I AM BEING CRUSHED.
Admittedly, I will reincarnate, but then Sammy may well kill me again.
At least we won't look like each other then.
OH HOH HOH.
Twilight was being crushed too, while Dawn Gleaming taunted her with... a vocabulary quiz of her knowledge of Nithian?
This is not the time to see who knows what the undeadperfect tense is for!
They'd lost track of us and... oh hoh hoh...
"DAWN GLEAMING!" I shouted, making my sword look just like Sammy's. "Save me, that bastard Marcus has overpowered me!"
"No, I'm Sammy and HE is Samus Marcus!" Sammy protested. He made the tentacles squeeze. "Stop lying!"
I tossed my sword as best I could, making it look like I dropped it. "Oh no, now I can't cut myself loose! He's trying to kill me! Save me Dawn Gleaming! PLEASE!"
Rarity now saw the condition I was in; her father was out of danger, and she was about to come to my rescue when this hideous giant brain with tentacles grabbed her and she had to start fighting it.
GET OFF MY GIRLFRIEND, YOU OVERGROWN GRELL!
Being super-pissed off meant now I could...
Run my blood pressure really high.
Dammit.
Keen Eyes looked right at us and pointed at...
Sammy. "Get over here and save Rarity, you coward! I've always hated you and now I hate you MORE for leaving her here in trouble while you play sex-games with your evil twin!" Keen Eyes roared.
One, for instantly cluing in and helping me like that, I would tip my hat if my limbs were not pinned.
Secondly, phrasing it that way means now I feel incredibly creeped out by this spell and not just crushed by it.
"Sammy! I'm coming!" Dawn Gleaming said, running over.
Which left Twilight free to grab my sword with her magic and cut herself loose. Cue giant lightning swarm blowing Sammy and Dawn Gleaming across the room, OH YEAH.
Rarity now flicked an arrow out of her bags and shot it down the grell's beaked mouth. Huge amounts of foam began to froth and it began to make gurgly noises; it dropped her and began trying to dig the foam out of its mouth.
"Fire-retardant arrow," she told me, smiling.
HAH.
Then she shot me loose and Twilight and I rallied to her side.
I could see Dragonfly; she was trying to do something which seemed to involve hovering in the air, making weird noises and grunting a lot. "Mistress, help me! I want to help you but I can't turn into a dragon!" She looked utterly embarrassed.
"BLAST HER!!!" Marjorie shouted, trying to get loose.
So Dragonshy unleashed a wave of lightning onto Flutterdragon, who yelped and fell off her. Flutterdragon turned and said, "That wasn't nice at all!"
Marjorie flew up to Flutterdragon as Flutterdragon coiled around, readying for a pounce. "My dear little Dragonfly, your loyalty touches my heart." She gently nuzzled Dragonfly, who turned a little red. "I will give you my power and we will blast this FAKE DRAGON to bits." She seemed quite bent out of shape over the impersonation.
"I won't let you hurt my friends!" Flutterdragon said. "If you care about your followers, why aren't you helping them!"
Monsters were, in fact, coming at both our side and theirs and now everyone was running around wildly, trying to avoid being eaten by the seemingly endless tide. Applejack and Apple Blossom were STILL arguing over what it means to be 'natural', I will note.
I'd be pleased she was deeper than I thought if not for the likelihood it will get them eaten while they debate.
"You were trying to CRUSH ME," Marjorie said. "Why were you attacking me instead of helping them?"
"Because you were attacking my friends!" Flutterdragon roared. "I won't let ANYTHING hurt them!"
"We'll see about that!" Marjorie said. "BLAST HER! Then we'll deal with the monsters!"
Dragonfly hurled lightning and now Flutterdragon breathed fire. They met in the air in a giant storm, neutralizing each other. Except that dragons have limited breath and druids...
Can do lightning for a long time.
I had to do something but now Sammy was coming at me again and some kind of freaky devils with beards were after me too.
DAMMIT.
****************
Sweetie's Point of View:
Dinky's mom looked kind of clobbered when she stumbled back onto the bridge, then gave everyone a hoof up. "Cruisin' is down for the count," she said.
Everyone cheered and she smiled. Dinky ran over and hugged her, then ran back to her station.
That's when the Dragonfly Ships flew up out of the clouds and called on us to surrender or be destroyed.
ACK.
"General Hooves, what should I tell them?" the conn officer asked Dinky's mom.
I wondered when she had become a general. But adults often don't tell fillies everything.
Or ANYTHING important, really.
I did a spread of cards. There's a dragon about to attack us. I didn't SEE a dragon but maybe it's invisible. A very powerful dragon. And it's friends.
"Do we have any functional weapons?" Dinky's mom asked, looking panicked.
"All weapons functional except the two main guns, one of which does nothing, while the other makes soothing ocean noises," one of the soldiers said, looking irritated.
"You'd think the store that says it sells EVERYTHING would have demi-liches, but NO, they yelled at me for even ASKING," Apple Bloom said bitterly.
"Dear, you will get ripped off if you believe advertising slogans," Dinky's mom said kindly to her. "Do we have any fighters?"
"We have hanglider troops but they'll be shot down before they can reach the Dragonflies, unless they get a distraction."
Dinky's mother closed her eyes for a few seconds.
"I could make a fog and hide the troops!" Dinky said excitedly.
"If I do a full dive, they would have to follow us into the clouds, and then we'd have cover to launch the gliders!" Twist said.
"The gliders would get lost in the clouds," one of the soldiers said. "Otherwise, that would be great."
"I can lead them," Dinky's mom said. "I am a mailpony and the mail MUST GO THROUGH, in wind and weather, in storm and drang, in pomp *and* circumstance!"
I wonder what 'drang' is.
The marines saluted and followed her as they ran to the glider bays. "Sweetie! Keep our foes distracted until we're ready to dive and launch!"
I ran over to the comm officer. "This is Divination Officer Sweetie Belle of the Moon Raker," I said. "Captain Lunette is busy looting and pillaging. Please repeat your demands in the form of a bulleted list."
"In the form of a what?" a confused, angry man said through the comm line.
"A bulleted list," I told him. Father likes to say that, but I'm not sure what it is. "We can wait if you need to collect enough male cows."
"First of all, there is no such thing as a male cow," the man said to me. "Cows are female BY DEFINITION. Secondly, male cattle are called bulls. I know you all drink milk, so you have no excuse not to know the difference between male and female cattle. Thirdly, I see no point in attaching sling bullets to our demands."
"That's a bulleted list," I told him, trying to be helpful. "Do it like that."
I could hear Twist laughing as she reoriented the propellers for rapid descent when Dinky's mom gives the signal.
"That's a NUMERAL list," he said pedantically, reminding me of Twilight. "Each list item has a number, not a sling bullet. What would even be the point of using a sling bullet?"
"The Equestrian military makes extensive use of bulleted lists," I told him. "Obviously they're more advanced in list technology than a backwater like Glantri. I guess you're just falling behind because you spent all your time making flying machines when pegasi can fly with their wings."
I shouldn't be so mean to the poor man but I have to keep him from thinking about how he could be blowing us up instead of arguing with me.
The pegasi on the bridge all snickered and high-hoofed.
"I will have you know that Glantri has the FINEST military in this region of the Known World!" the man said angrily.
"Don't you always complain they won't give you enough money for the military, sir?" I heard someone say distantly behind him.
I heard the human say something about staying in character; it sounded muffled. He probably put his hand over the speaker.
I did a quick divination draw. The King of Flames. He's some kind of powerful wizard.
"What is your name?" I asked.
"Herr Ukvarth, Dragon Hunter," he said.
"We're not dragons, sir," I said.
"We're ready," Twist said softly.
But Dinky's mother wasn't ready yet.
Or forgot to signal. She can be kind of forgetful.
"You serve a dragon," he said angrily.
"No, no, we're not servants of a dragon!" I said.
"You were just anchored over a major dragon's lair for fun," he said dubiously. "I was not born yesterday." He paused. "Wait, you're Equestrians?"
Are we supposed to be?
"We're dread pirates!" I said. "Completely not affiliated with the Equestrian government AT ALL, and thus it did not send us here, AT ALL." That should cover our tracks.
Why is Twist making the 'you screwed up' face at me?
"Buy us five more minutes, almost ready," came in over the comm line from the glider decks.
"I see," he said. "They'll have no reason to complain when we take your ship, then." He had that moderately obssessed / angry sound Spike gets when you try to keep food away from him when he really wants it. "Certainly you're not putting it to any useful use and I would."
Uh oh.
Umm...umm... CELESTIA'S MOTHER, IF YOU ARE LISTENING, HELP ME! I THINK WE'RE GOING TO DIE!
Flames roared up in a pillar next to the empty Captain's chair and now a red coated Unicorn mare appeared. It was Cunning Thought, Celestia's mother!
"Dear child," she said kindly, nuzzling me. "I never got to give you your present."
"Please, do something! The Glantrians are about to blow us up!"
I could see weapons arming as we spoke.
"Well, I don't have any demi-liches on tap. They're so hard to keep from eating your other pets," she said. She made a bag appear. "But I DO have a Slaad, so it will have to do."
She and Apple Bloom shoved the giant frog monster down a chute into the death-ray engine as it howled and cursed and invoked someone named 'Timrek the Uneasy'. Then we couldn't hear it any more.
The death ray button pinged. "Deathray fully charged," the earth pony now manning Twist's old station said.
"One minute!" Dinky's mom told us remotely.
"This ship is now FULLY ARMED. Surrender or be destroyed!" Apple Bloom said over the com line.
"You would have used it already if you had anything," the man said dismissively. "You surrender."
"Uncle K would be very disappointed if I gave up my treasure without a fight!" Apple Bloom said.
Man, Scootaloo's going to be disappointed she missed this.
"Ready!" Dinky's mom shouted.
"FIRE!" I shouted.
Apple Bloom hit the Death Ray Button with her tail.
For a moment, nothing happened, but then....
A huge rainbow wave of ever changing rays of light erupted from the death ray cannon. Trees began to rain from the sky. Dogs and cats were living together on the wings of the Dragonflies. One of the Dragonflies turned into a winged sheep. One of them began firing brightly colored streamers at us.
"Oh god, I'm a TURTLE!" someone shouted.
"I can see the blank spaces between the lines!" someone shouted distantly. "When you speak!"
"What have you done? WHAT IS THIS?" Herr Ukvarth shouted. I heard someone meowing behind him. He took his pet cat on the mission?
"DIVE!" I shouted.
"THIS IS CHAOS!" Cunning Thought shouted over the comm line, laughing and laughing and laughing.
And then we dove into the clouds and the gliders launched as the Dragonflies tried to descend after us. We could hear the battle but not see it.
"Sensors indicate it will take one day to fully recharge the Chaos Gun," the officer at Twist's station said.
"Thank you," I said to Celestia's mother. "You saved us."
"You all saved yourselves. You had a good plan, I just made it easier. You should all be proud of yourself. I know my daughter will be pleased with you all." Cunning Thought said grandly.
"Are you really Princess Celestia's mother?" Twist said, shocked.
"I am indeed," she said and now everypony bowed to her.
I started to bow, but she said, "You need not bow, dear little one. Look at your cutie mark."
It had CHANGED. I was stunned. Now each of the cards was a Queen of one of the suits. At the scale, it was hard to tell, but the Queen of Stones had red hair and the Queen of Winds had purple hair like Scootaloo and the Queen of Waters had blonde hair and the Queen of Flames had pink-purple mixed hair like me and the Queen of Shadows had hair like Twist's.
"Cutie marks can CHANGE?" Twist said, stunned.
"Not so much a change as a revelation. Your destiny is chosen and set now. Scootaloo got her cutie mark," Cunning Thought said kindly. "The five of you, one day, will be great. You shouldn't count on me to always be there, for I am very busy helping many others, but I will always be your friend and helper."
Lyra and Bon-Bon now reached the bridge. "What's going on?" Lyra asked. "Why did..." She saw Cunning Thought and her jaw dropped. "I... you..."
Bon-Bon said, "It's a pleasure to meet you, ma'am. Are you one of Big Macintosh's relatives?" She paused. "Oh, you're a unicorn," she said and sounded VERY embarrassed.
"Well, if he and my daughter get married one day, I will be," she said, smiling. "I wish Celestia luck. Men can be hard to deal with."
Bon-Bon looked stunned.
"She is CUNNING THOUGHT," Lyra said urgently. "She's Celestia's mother!"
"I know, I met her before," I said. "Don't worry, she's very nice."
Lyra flailed her arms in the air, then grabbed her own head with her hands. I do not understand why.
"I could make you a human if you like, forever," Cunning Thought said kindly to Lyra. "Your lady friend too, of course."
Lyra looked very tempted, which seems weird to me. Though I admit I am kind of curious what it would be like. Rarity seems to like it.
Bon-Bon, though, looked crushed.
"Bon-Bon isn't interested in being a human all the time, thank you," Lyra said weakly. "And I won't leave her behind. This is fun for me, but it has to be a part-time thing. I love her and I won't leave her behind, even for... " Her voice trailed off. "Not for anything." She ruffled Bon-Bon's mane and Bon-Bon smiled.
And then there was a swirl of shadows and Lunette, the Ghostly Gang, and the Radhirajah stepped out of the shadows.
"Okay, what's going on here? We secured... MOTHER?" Lunette said, staring, mouth open wide.
"Darling, I am enjoying this glorious mess you have made," Cunning Thought said. "Come and give your mother a hug. I love you so much, Luna." Her voice was very warm and kind.
"Mother, get away from that filly," Lunette said angrily, striding towards us. "Clyde, take the Radhirajah to a secure room and keep him safe. I will deal with mother."
The Ghostly Gang grabbed the hapless looking Radhirajah and vanished through the floor.
"It's okay! She's very nice, really!" I guess Princess Luna and Princess Celestia must have had a big fight with their mother and never made up.
I have to help them!
"Mother says you should never go to bed angry with each other," I told them. "You should hug and make up."
Cunning Thought dropped down to squat on her hind legs and held her forelegs out for a hug. "Come and get a hug, dear. Everyone else forgave you for trying to create Eternal Night, so I forgive you too."
This just seemed to make Lunette even ANGRIER.
"Don't mock me, mother," Lunette said angrily.
"Sir... ma'am, General Hooves is leading a glider attack on the Glantrian dragonflies right now," one of the soliders said. "She could probably use your support."
"GO," Lunette said, pointing at her mother.
"You should at least give her a hug before she goes," I said solemnly to Lunette.
"Mommy and I love to hug all the time!" Dinky said proudly.
"It's okay," Cunning Thought said, nuzzling me. "I'll see you later, Sweetie. You need to feed the Slaad a bushel of garbage a day or it'll try to eat its way out of the Chaos Gun Engine."
"Okay," I told her. I know how important feeding pets is. One time, I had to take care of Opalescence and...
Umm...
Well, I don't have pet fish any more because I forgot to feed her.
Let's leave it at that.
"You gave Sweetie a SLAAD for a pet?" Lunette said, mouth open wide.
"It's not for Sweetie, it's for your ship, dear," Cunning Thought said. "Though I should get you a pet, my darling daughter. And tell Celestia it's traditional to date someone who resembles your FATHER, not your mother." She nuzzled me, then stepped back and vanished into a pillar of fire which soon vanished. As she faded, she shouted to Apple Bloom, "You can tell Keraptis that I'm impressed by how much he taught you! Good job, Apple Bloom!"
She beamed brightly.
Oh man, she didn't get to give me a present again!
But I shouldn't be greedy, so I won't nag.
Also, I think I may have to keep Princess Luna... Dread Pirate Lunette... from exploding.
But I'm good with people. That's what Mother and Father both always tell me!
I hope this will make them proud.
*****************
Applejack-O-Vision:
I looked around gloomily at the chaos; everypony was running around, zapping monsters or trying to avoid being eaten, while Fluttershy the Dragon duelled determinedly with Dragonfly and Marjorie. It wasn't going well for her but the rest of us were trying to avoid being killed.
I myself was being chased by this huge yellow puffball fungus creature which bounced around off the walls like an animate cue ball (painted yellow) from a game of pool.
Apple Blossom ran alongside me, continuing to hammer away at me with words. "If you really wanted to be natural, you'd stop talking and go live in a wild herd where some male pony ran the show and chased off any rival males and you had to compete with a bunch of other women for his affections. Like our totally natural ancestors did."
I grimaced at that. It ain't that I don't like stallions; I like me a good strong hard-working man. But finding one who wants to farm apples who ain't already my kin ain't easy. Seems like they either just want to bump rump and run or they DO like me but they can't see buckin' apples the rest of their life.
Dammit. I really liked Coltson too.
I guess I'm married to my farm.
The farm I OUGHT to be at right now.
But life keeps pulling me away from it.
"I should just buck the hell out of that damn puffball," I grumbled.
"It will spew spores onto us and tiny puffballs will eat their way out of our flesh," Apple Blossom said to me.
Which is why I haven't done it. "If yer so great, why don't YOU do something about it?"
"If I try and use my fighting skills, they require contact like yours, even if they are more graceful. And I fear my superior social skills do not, in fact, work on giant fungus bouncing balls," she said ruefully.
"So much for your superior city education," I said, frustrated.
"And I don't see YOU doing anything either," Apple Blossom said irritably.
The building being ON FIRE did not make me any happier, either. It was hot and I was sweating. Not honest work sweat but 'Applejack is overheating and about to get heat exhaustion due to fire' sweat.
"Drink," Apple Blossom said, flinging a bottle into my mouth.
I drank. It was orange brandy, I think, in a small snack-sized bottle. I felt better, though, refreshing my fluids.
Or maybe I was too drunk to care now. "Thanks," I said. I do have manners, you know.
I was suddenly keenly aware my ancestors would have been killed by this thing before they got changed by humans. They were a lot closer to those non-sentient ponies and horses a lot of human communities have. They're a little creepy but also endearing. I guess for us it's like with humans and monkeys. Close and yet so far.
I ain't natural. That cuts to the quick. Whether I am a country girl or a city girl, either way, I got changed from what nature intended, a long time ago.
But being like those pet ponies... that ain't natural for me. I dunno what is natural or not.
I do know my friends are in trouble and need me to act, not to just whine and feel sorry for myself like that fool I dated in high school. I dunno WHAT I was thinking.
He was cute, I was young, I got urges, everyone does, right?
Watchin' this thing bounce after us, it had a very predictable bouncin' pattern. I could exploit that.
"I gotta plan," I told my evil twin. "You gotta stick by my side, follow me exactly." This was gonna be kinda risky.
We raced around the room, dodging monsters and shouts and chaos, while Fluttershy the Dragon and her evil twin and Marjorie flew around zapping each other above us. I spotted a fire and ran for it.
"We can't run through that fire!," Apple Blossom said in a panic.
"Gonna have to jump it at just the right time, so our new friend lands in it," I told her.
"I'm not good at jumping," she confessed.
"You'd better learn fast," I said. "Don't worry, I'll help you."
In fact, I scooped her up and we LEAPED over it. It wasn't natural. But there's more important things than what's natural, like helping kin and friends and folks and fighting for those you love. Each and every one of my friends would help me with this thing if they could and I'd do the same for them.
And really, Apple Blossom ain't evil, she's just kinda vain and stuck up. I just clash with her because she's a low-budget version of Rarity.
My element surged, I could feel it, and we cleared the fire by a mile. Which is good, as it made me pretty nervous. Something in a pony's gut knows to stay away from fire.
The puffball, runnin' on instinct, couldn't think to avoid the fire and it burned up, obeying its nature and dying.
I'm a pony. I have instincts. Natural or not, they guide me. But I'm also a thinking animal. And I can overcome those instincts, like fear of fire, when I have to. I am what I am, wherever that am came from, so to speak.
"Look, if we all keep fighting each other, these crazy things are gonna eat us all," I told Apple Blossom. "We gotta talk your boss down. At least for now. Deal?"
We shook hooves. "Deal," she said. "So, I wasn't able to shake you," she said, disappointed.
"You shook me pretty good," I told her. "I needed a good mental bucking, knock some rotted branches down. I've got a clearer head, thanks to you, sister," I told her. "Now, let's see about settlin' this riot."
How we're gonna get Marjorie's attention... that's another question.
*****************
Ivan's Point of View:
I would like to say that Niccolo and I had a graceful, elegant battle full of barbed wit and clever sayings.
What we actually had was a brutal knockdown drag-out brawl up the stairs in the library, where we'd basically adjourned from the chaos to get down to mauling each other.
Hopefully no one really wanted the remaining items here as we were busy throwing them at each other, hitting each other with chairs, etc. He'd tried to psych me out, he'd failed, and now he was slowly getting his ass kicked because he couldn't get the mental edge on me.
He probably would have, if I hadn't met Luna. I've never been very strong willed. That's how I let Cufen... Marcus... whatever he is now... drag me into all these things. He'd have some crazy idea and I'd tag along because that's what I do.
It was fun, he was a good pal, and I was young enough to do crazy things just to show how badass I was.
Until I tried to go home. I wasn't going to stay; I just wanted to show off.
I never got there because I saw too many things which reminded me what a mess my homeland is. It's getting better but there's still a lot of bad things going down and it isn't just Thyatians oppressing Traladarans. We do it to each other too.
I had to decide, if I was going to do something about it or not.
After seeing a village starving because its lord wouldn't let them grow food because he wanted to grow expensive crops for export, I made my choice. Lord Valescu probably still wonders where all his money went. Assuming he's actually made it back from Norwold, yet.
Damn, shipping rates are HIGH.
I'm guessing that 'Niccolo' decided to see about taking his wealth and wiggling into the aristocracy. Not me. I'm going to bring them DOWN.
Marcus would probably try to find out Niccolo's backstory, work his mind, bring him around. He'll probably end this by stealing Dawn Gleaming from Sammy and run off with all the ponies he can find.
Then they'll kick his ass for doing something stupid.
That's Marcus for you. He's crazy but he's my best friend, so that's why I'm here fighting my evil twin in a library. Well, also because I want to help Luna.
I find it odd that I feel a kinship to a divine pony who is Loki's daughter, but we both sought immortality for exactly the same reason. Our people were being crushed by wolves (metaphorically) and we wanted the power to help them.
For all that Sind deserves a huge shaking up, I won't let Marjorie pit them against Equestria. It's not perfect, but it's a good country. Stupid dragon. I do not know how we're going to stop her, though. If she's an Immortal, and she likely is, she's beyond mortal power. Though hopefully Luna can neutralize her.
Marcus will probably try to get her to date him.
He is the definition of inability to keep it in your pants.
Though seeing Rarity as a human, I can see why. Or Lunette.
Focus.
My musing got me hit in the head with some sort of encyclopedia, but I knocked him down with a chair and then jumped on him, rolling around, until he threw me into a bookcase. It fell on me and I slipped into the shadows as Luna taught me. It feels creepy when I do this, flickering from shadow to shadow. I about screamed when she first showed me this.
I'm not even sure how it works. Something to do with the plane of shadow or something... I'm going to have to ask for metaphysics lessons once this is over. I know some things, I've been trying to study but it doesn't come easily to me.
"Running away? Not surprising," Niccolo said. But while his words were light, he stayed wary. Smart man.
I jumped him from behind and pinned his arms, then banged his head on the table. "Give up. I don't want to kill you."
"I never give up," he said stubbornly.
We have one thing in common.
So I beat him down until he passed out, then dragged him down the stairs. I am going to have to stash him in someone's bag. Not a very elegant victory but I need to pitch in and help with the real fight. I expect Marcus has accidentally married Marjorie AND the bone devil by now.
And it'll be my job to get him out of it.
******************
Marcus-O-Vision:
I was riding Twilight and Rarity was riding her father, Captain Keen Eyes, both of them enlarged, of course, while Spikey AND Spike rode on Clarity, breathing fire everywhere. We were plowing through eldritch horrors. How many of these damn things are there?
That being said, if I have to fight endless tides of fungus, extraplanars, plant monsters and giant insects, this is a pretty good squad for it.
But I have to do something to help Flutterdragon. She's basically being overwhelmed but none of the rest of us can get up there to help her. "Twilight, we have to help Fluttershy," I said as I cut down a giant tiger beetle and Spike burned the remains.
"Cover us," Twilight said to the others. "I am going to get Marjorie's attention." She enlarged herself further, until she was as big as Celestia. I licked my lips nervously as she did so; I could feel the power throbbing through her.
But then Applejack shouted up at Marjorie. "Hey, your highness, we gotta make a truce or we're all gonna get 'et!"
"She's right," Apple Blossom shouted. "We can settle our differences later when we're not in danger of being eaten!"
"I won't let you trick me!" Marjorie shouted. "Or let this FAKE dragon challenge me!" She sounded quite angry over that.
Applejack closed her eyes and then when she opened them, they glowed. "I am the Element of Honesty and I swear by my Element and by the power of Harmony itself that we will not betray or backstab you if you help us stop this menace before it destroys us and your servants, the Elements of Power. Don't you care about them?" I could feel the truth of her words, her honesty. You couldn't deny it. There was no room to hide from it.
"I... I..." Marjorie's voice wobbled and she looked down at how battered and torn everyone was, how her own followers were scattered while she obsessively focused on destroying Flutterdragon, who was a mess herself. She looked at herself and said to Dragonfly, "These things can't be natural, can they?"
"I haven't seen where they came from, but I am wondering why they hadn't already killed each other off and why they're cooperating," Dragonfly said.
"I THINK WE NEED TO FIND OUT," Applejack said, her voice echoing oddly. Twilight stared at her and I got this odd shivery feeling. "ISN'T IT THE JOB OF DRUIDS TO PUT AN END TO THREATS TO NATURE?" she said.
Dragonfly gulped as if a student being dressed down by the headmaster. "Yes," she said weakly.
"AND OF IMMORTALS TO DEAL WITH THREATS TO THIS DIMENSION?" Applejack said.
"Yes," Marjorie said. "But I didn't do it!"
"I DID NOT SAY YOU DID. THEY WOULD NOT BE ATTACKING BOTH SIDES. WHICH MEANS WE HAVE A MUTUAL FOE," Applejack said. "CAN WE NOT MAKE A DEAL?"
"My little ponies," Marjorie mumbled, then looked stunned.
Spend too much time in a form and it starts getting into your brain, I thought. I've seen that.
"YOU DON'T LIKE SEEING THEM HURT."
Marjorie looked mortified, but then she looked down at Dawn Gleaming, Clarity, Pinkamena, everypony one by one. "AGREED," she said, her voice booming to match Applejack's. "WE WILL DEFEAT THIS THREAT AND THEN SETTLE OUR DISAGREEMENTS AFTERWARDS. ELEMENTS OF POWER! RALLY TO ME!"
Apple Blossom's nostils flared. "Well done, sister," she said, sounding honestly congratulatory.
And then we rallied all our forces. Ivan appeared from whereever the hell he's been goofing off and handed a potion to Flutterdragon. She downed it all and some of her wounds healed up. "I didn't mean to take it all," she said. "Now you don't have any!"
"You needed it," he said to her, then stuffed Niccolo in her bags. "You'd better take a form which will fit downstairs.
Flutterdragon became Fluttershy and now we all began pushing against the tide; we had to get to its source. Before it was too late.
***************
Ditzy-Vision-Redux:
They really need to install proper safety glass on these Dragonflies. When I kicked the window in, it flew everywhere in jagged shards! Somepony could get hurt!
Mind you, one of the crew was now a highly armored turtle, another one had turned two-dimensional and a third was now a tree.
Fluttershy will be very jealous.
Herr Ukvarth now had a duck on his head. In fact, I think he was wearing Fluttershy's duck hat. But how could he have even stolen it?
For a few seconds, we stared at each other through the broken window. Then he grimaced. "YOU," he said. "I know you! You're the infamous extradimensional criminal Derpy Hooves!"
"I am not a criminal and that is not my name and I don't even know how this got started! Also, your vehicle is TOTALLY unsafe for children. Look at that broken glass!" I said. "Someone could cut themselves!"
For a moment, there was a deep and terrible silence.
Then the two surviving allies of Herr Ukvarth drew wands on me. "Waste her?" one of them said.
"YES," he said and pulled out a black metal rod, shaped like an L, which spat lightning. Another one shot a stream of acid and the third shot glowing arrows at me.
So I whipped the cloud into a bubble shield and listened to them burst as I rose up to one side, then landed on one of the wings. The whole vehicle rolled over now and I heard yelping and something about roots.
Now it began to plummet, unable to fly upside down, unlike me.
Which means they're going to fall to their death.
This kind of forgetfulness is why my pay gets docked half the time at work.
Frantic jumping got it righted, much lower down in th cloud, before they could all die.
Herr Ukvarth now gave a cry like a man who has seen the end of time and space.
I know this because I've been there and watched someone see it.
I nearly fell in too but the Doctor saved me.
"ENOUGH!" he shouted. "NO MORE SUBTLETY!"
If this was subtlety... oh dear.
First I saw a bunch of bright flashes inside the Dragonfly. Then a huge dragon with crystalline blue scales erupted out of it, breaking it to bits. Two men rode it, the ones from before; one had a sling bag over one shoulder with a tree branch sticking out of it.
It was HUGE and ANGRY and I guess Herr Ukvarth summoned it, except I don't see him anywhere. Did he turn into it?
"HOOVES! YOU WILL FINALLY PERISH FOR YOUR MANY CRIMES AGAINST LAW AND ORDER."
"No pony will ever kneel to tyrants again!" I shouted defiantly, my knees knocking. I am going to be eaten and Dinky is going to have to go live with her father, who will probably sell her to buy paint and then I will be punished in the afterlife forever for being a BAD MOTHER.
He sounded crazed, like someone pushed too far. "YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO KNEEL BECAUSE YOU WON'T HAVE ANY LEGS." And then he spat lightning at me. I got clipped as I fled and then the thunderclap which followed sent me tumbling through the mist, to where he couldn't see me.
So I bolted upwards, hoping I could warn everyone in time.
*****************
Marcus-O-Vision:
Fighting through the endless hordes of monsters would have taken us forever, but Twilight had a clever plan. She teleported us all; I would have expected this to tire her out, but she was only a little winded by it. Her eyes were glowing and she looked determined.
We landed just outside the door into the restricted area. Creatures were being herded out by humanoid figures covered in chains; chain devils. Beyond, you could see a sickly purple glow and labs crowded with monsters.
For a second, they stared at us in shock, then one of them said, "Agents of law AND chaos? Working together? The Daydream Dimension is even more insane than Master Baalzebul said!"
"SERVANTS OF NIGHTMARE," Marjorie bellowed in an echoing voice. "LAW AND CHAOS STAND TOGETHER TO DEFEND THIS DIMENSION AGAINST THE INTRUSION OF YOUR KIND INTO IT. THIS IS WHY THE IMMORTALS EXIST. DEPART IMMEDIATELY OR BE DESTROYED!"
"This world will belong to Master Baalzebul! Your own kind opened the way!" the chain devil shouted.
As I understand it, devils serve the Masters of the Nightmare Dimension. The Masters are to them as the Immortals are to us. But in the Nightmare Dimension, there is only one Sphere aligned with law instead of four, known as the sphere of Order. And they're the troublemakers of the system, instead of Entropy and Chaos, which is divided into four spheres. Devils serve the Masters of the Sphere of Order, mostly. (Demons mainly serve the Immortals of Entropy in our dimension.)
That explains why all these monsters are fighting together; they're under the influence of Nightmare Order. The way sometimes in your dreams, everyone is out to get you.
At least in my dreams.
Who the hell could have opened the way except the Bone Devil, though?
The guy who summoned it and probably blew a hole into the Nightmare Dimension, then tried to seal it off.
ACK.
YOU STUPID NITHIAN MORON!
I think I know what ACTUALLY happened to Rathanhotep. He got eaten by the Nightmare Dimension, that's what.
From inside the chamber beyond, Pinkie now said, "Hey, if I throw a muffin into this huge glowing hole, it turns back into the stuff I made it from!"
The chain devil monster chivviers froze up.
"WHAT AM I DOING IN HERE?" Mr. Turnip shouted from the room in a panic. "No, you can't have my cabbages, you crazed howler monkey!"
Wild ululating now echoed through the air.
Pinkamena, Pinkie, and the half-real gang had somehow all gotten ahead of us into the room.
"KEEP HER AWAY FROM THE GATE!" Someone shouted in the room and now all hell, of course, broke loose.
***************
Luna-O-Vision:
As I tensely tried to monitor the battle within the limits of this mortal identity and the ship's capacities, I felt a growing confidence at first. Our forces were taking out the Dragonflies and the attack was going well. For us, that is.
Then Ditzy emerged from the fog shouting about how she's sorry and she'll never be late to work again and something about flowers. This couldn't bode well.
In fact, it boded the arrival of a massive Sapphire Dragon. THAT didn't bode well, especially because it had Glantrians riding on it and... is that a tree? Does he have a sling bag of holding with a tree in it?
This really shouldn't surprise me, given what the ESS Moonraker is.
"We need to use the Chaos Ray!" Dinky said urgently. "We have to save Mom!"
"It won't recharge for hours," Apple Bloom said. "And the Wave Motion Cannon... doesn't work like I thought it would. And he's kind of big for most of my traps... Maybe we could feed him that cake Scootaloo tried to make."
"I already disposed of it as a health hazard," I told them. "Lyra, any chance you could charm a dragon?"
"Ahahahaha," she said nervously. "I could try. It beats just being eaten."
I am restricted in the power I can deploy in this form, or even my Luna body. Under the rule of the Immortals. And Celestia and I prefer to encourage ponies to take the lead when possible. It is our duty to help them to raise themselves up, not to simply protect them as you do children.
"AHAH," Apple Bloom said. "I have a PLAN. Dinky, you can carry something light inside your bubbles, right?"
"Yes," Dinky said.
"We can feed him some of the candy, then trick him into shapeshifting into something else!" Apple Bloom said.
"Put it inside a hunk of meat," Lyra said.
"He'll suspect it's poisoned if we just offer him meat," I told them.
"Oooh, if he sticks his head into a glider bay, I can shut the door on him and someone can throw it down his throat while his head is stuck," Apple Bloom said.
Rainbow Dash is nearby, but I don't know if she's free.
"I have hands," Lyra said. "I can do it."
"You will distract him as best you can with music," I told her. "Then I will throw the candy; I can sneak in close to him like this."
We rushed down, with me casting a spell to link me to Apple Bloom so she could trigger on my command and telling Ditzy to make for the hanger.
Lyra began playing a tune as the dragon and Ditzy came into sight. I slinked into the shadows.
o/~ You're going to love me
o/~ With all of your heart,
o/~ Love forever will bind us
o/~ Never will we part.
The dragon's eyes flickered but he threw off the spell with ease.
Ditzy, however, got hearts in her eyes! "Oh yes, my love!" she shouted and bee-lined for Lyra.
Lyra froze up.
"Fools! This ship will be mine and the ETHENGARIANS WILL BE DESTROYED!" the dragon shouted.
Oh hoh hoh. This dragon must work for Jagger. I'd heard rumors he studied Dracology. It's a secret art where you gain dragon-like powers and eventually can turn into a dragon.
In fact, this might be Jagger.
Someone's not used to controlling his transformation, I think.
Lyra and Ditzy wildly dodged acid but the one with the glowing arrow wand, the arrows chased them, nailing them both in the posterior. They stumbled around shouting.
The hangar door came down CRUNCH. It won't hold him more than a few seconds. But that's enough.
I darted in and threw the candy down his throat. Then he blew me across the room with lightning.
"PRINCESS LUNA!" Ditzy said in a panic.
I haven't actually been really hurt in a long time, not counting when I was Nightmare Moon and the Elements blasted me. That felt strangely good.
This did not.
Now Apple Bloom said, "Surrender or I will turn you into a cute fluffy kitten!" over the loudspeakers.
"A cute fluffy kitten?" he said.
Blink, cute fluffy kitten.
The two guys on his back now plunged down the side of the Moonraker, though Applebloom caught them with a net.
"You probably think this is funny," the dragon-kitty squeaked. He had dark blue fur and black ears.
"SO CUTE," Ditzy said and started to run over.
Then he turned back into a dragon.
"CHEATER!" Apple Bloom said as he tore the hangar apart. Ditzy saved Lyra and I leaped onto his back.
"Are you dragon or dracologist?" I asked him.
"I am Storm Front the Mighty!" he shouted.
Never heard of him but that could mean a bluff or that he's just a Sapphire I don't know.
Ditzy hugged Lyra tightly. "My dear sweet love!"
"Aargh, Ditzy, it wasn't supposed to affect you!" Lyra said. "I have a girlfriend!"
"It's okay! I can share!" Ditzy said. "Dinky will be happy to have three mommies!"
Lyra laughed nervously.
"Storm Front, this is an Equestrian Ship. Do you wish to experience the wrath of Equestria?" I said.
"It's a ship with Equestrians in it. It's not on the official registry," he said. "And you've violated several countries' airspace if this IS an official ship."
He tried to buck me off and I clung to him.
And then Rainbow Dash, Rainbow Crash, and Scootaloo flew up together to us. "Hey, dragon," Rainbow Dash said.
"My divination tells me that he likes cheese!" Sweetie Belle said, sounding frustrated. "Cards, I need a better answer." I had a tap running to the bridge as well. Magic has its benefits.
"One of the Elements of Harmony," Storm Front said, then frowned. He blinked. "There are two of you."
"And me!" Scootaloo said proudly.
"You are irrelevant compared to them," Storm Front said.
Scootaloo frowned. "I have a cutie mark and I WILL KICK YOUR ASS!"
One of the Rainbows held her back. Dash, I think.
"There's two of us because we move so fast we are always in two places at once," Rainbow Crash said.
"Oh Lyra, let's go make a love nest!" Ditzy said.
"Take me somewhere stable so I can dispel this!" Lyra said frantically.
Ditzy flew off with Lyra, no doubt looking for a stable.
He eyed their necklaces. I wondered again if Crash's necklace does anything or if it's just jewelry. We're still not fully sure of their nature.
"We dumped off all the falling guys," Dash said to me. "So they won't go splat."
"SPLAT," Scootaloo said enthusiastically.
"Mercy in war is the Equestrian way," I said to Storm Front as he opened his mouth.
"Thank you," he said roughly. "But I must have your ship."
"Do you really think you can take this without destroying it?" Bon-Bon said from the wreckage of the hangar. What is she doing here? She advanced as close as she could, candy-cane spear rig on her back. "We will fight with all our strength. Maybe you can take us, but even if you do take it, the rest of the Elements of Harmony will return."
He frowned at that.
"And we both know they defeated an Immortal. Are you immortal?" she asked Storm Front. "Is this place really worth leaving your men in a monster-infested swamp next to a dragon's fortress so you can destroy this place trying to capture it?"
He peered down through the mists, frowning.
"Of course, you might think clearer if you went back to your natural body instead of letting your dragon form think for you," she continued. "It's seductive, I know. I've been there." She shivered a little.
"I would fall to my death," Storm Front said, but now he frowned more.
"Then land and change," she said. "I promise you won't be attacked."
I nodded. "We are willing to negotiate. It is the Equestrian way."
He studied her curiously. "You are a shapeshifter?"
Nervously, she pulled a candy out of her pack and ate it, then turned into a human.
A naked human, since she wasn't wearing any clothing, except a necklace. Okay, a mostly naked human wearing a candy cane rig. It was rather silly looking but she was, of course, utterly shameless, being a pony and used to nudity.
"Come here," she said softly. "We can talk this out, I'm sure."
He put his paws over his eyes, which was the cutest thing I have seen in a long time. "Young lady, you are naked."
"I was naked before," she said.
He cast a spell and she was now clad in an elegant Aalbanese style military uniform.
Then he flew over and turned into Herr Ukvarth. He stumbled, then grimaced. "I see," he said, sounding calmer now.
"I know. This body tells me all sorts of things, but I don't have to listen and neither do you," she said to him.
He sighed and looked at me. "Let us forget this ever happened," he said. "I will say nothing if you will not."
"I will say nothing," I told him, shaking hands with him. Thank you, Bon-Bon, I thought.
Bon-Bon now began talking quietly to him about her experiences. This is a sight I'd never have thought I would see today.
Now I need to find out how everyone is doing at the tower. And decide on a response.
**************
Pinkie-O-Vision:
"Man, this is the best toy ever," I said, throwing a rubber chicken through the portal just to see what would happen.
I never found out because Pinkamena suddenly shrieked. So did our mutual friends, as they suddenly flickered into being shadows instead of people, then back, then into shadows again.
For a few seconds, I stared at them in horror. Then I realized that devils and monsters were both rushing towards the portal from the other side AND from our side.
I could hear fighting outside the large laboratory, where the air was torn by a roughly circular gash in the air; beyond it was a huge city of iron and stone buildings; a perpetual drizzle fell and the streets teemed with monsters being herded by devils.
But I couldn't try to do anything about that yet, because my first priority had to be to keep my friends and Pinkamena from evaporating.
Somehow.
I had NO CLUE what to do.
ELEMENT, DO SOMETHING! I shouted at it. Normally, I just do my thing and it helps. But all I know is bardic magic and half the time I even forget I have that.
I began playing a wake up song and singing about not evaporating. It really was NOT my best work. But I felt power surge and everyone solidified. I could hear shouting in the hallway and Marjorie sounding really angry. But I ignored that and focused on keeping my friends from evaporating. And my sister.
"Pinkamena, you have to stop them while I keep you alive," I told her.
She nodded and turned to the portal, while Sir Lintsalot, Rocky, Mr. Turnip, and Madame LeFlour formed a perimeter. They began clobbering monsters while I sang and played and Pinkamena studied the onrushing forces.
"If you kill him," she said to one devil, who was on fire, "Your bosses will write him off as a casualty of fighting us and you can take his power."
He didn't jump the other, but now they eyed each other warily and began herding their monsters to accidentally collide, leading to them accidentally eating each other. Soon, a giant monster brawl was clogging traffic, at least for the moment.
"That was kind of a mean thing to say," I said to Pinkamena. VERY mean.
"These are Devils. They would hang our souls up and torture us for a thousand years," Pinkamena said flatly. "I do what I must to hold this line until we are reinforced."
"Yes, but there is such a thing as going too far," I told her. "Egging people on to fight each other is BAD, sister." I continued playing frantically. "It's why I didn't want to have to fight you."
"You fight your way, I will fight mine," she said. More softly, she said, "Thank you, sister."
"For what?" I said and now she began to cry and I don't even know why.
Fire rushed around us, frying several fungi and a giant beetle, but a devil with huge horns and a pitchfork didn't care and rushed right at Marcus and Twilight as Twilight blew the doorway in and made her own highway into the room. She's so huge like that, nearly as big as Celestia and far angrier.
Celestia's big, though, is comforting, whereas Twilight's big was kind of scary, though I know she'd never hurt me.
She grabbed the devil with magic and held him in place, then Marcus stabbed him and he began to burn from the blow. Marcus looked surprised, then pleased. The devil fled and I let him escape through the portal. Better they run away, right? He was still burning, though.
"Don't worry, I will dispel this," Twilight said. She concentrated and even I, the Earth Pony, could feel the wave of magic.
And I saw the portal get bigger.
Twilight's jaw dropped and so did Marcus'.
A flock of winged devils with spears flew down from the other side of the portal, but arrows punctured their wings, causing them to crash, then returned to Rarity and Captain Keen Eyes. The rest of our friends were breaking in and now Marjorie stormed towards the portal, studying it.
"It ate my power and got bigger," Twilight said, frustrated.
Marjorie reached out at it and it grew again. She looked extremely frustrated. Devils rushed at her and she hurled acid at them; they ran screaming as it ate away at them. OWW. Man, she can be mean.
We held the line for a few minutes; with our forces here, we could repel the attacks, but more and more kept coming forwards. Some of our people were rearguard against the monsters we'd bypassed and Marjorie sent a message to Rainbow Crash and Twilight to Rainbow Dash, hoping they were both still conscious.
They soon joined us; Marjorie took over sustaining Pinkamena and friends, freeing me up, though I didn't know what to do, beyond introduce more monsters and devils to the joy of pie.
"I think this is Maladomini," Twilight said. It's one of the realm of the Masters of the Devils of the Nightmare Dimension. I haven't studied the planes a lot. "An endless city of evil which Baalzebul constantly rebuilds and destroys, an ever growing mound of cities piled on the ruins of cities which he destroyed for their flaws. Each time, he hopes the new city will live up to his standards, but it never is. And so he levels it, and builds on the rubble."
"But a city built on rubble can never be perfect. He does not clear the ground in his impatience. Instead, he makes the same mistake over and over, for he is a creature of Order," Dawn Gleaming said. Then she flicked lightning at an onrushing puddle of slime which now blew up. "As with all devils, he is driven to repeat himself, locked tight within the bonds he has forged for himself. In Gashpodel's Bestiary, Volume XI, he identifies the central trait of Order creatures as this binding to certain habits they cannot discard even at the risk of their life."
A whole lot of blah blah academic I am so smart me too and me and me too followed with Sammy, Dawn Gleaming, Marcus, and Twilight competing to show how much they know it all. It slid off my brain as I contemplated the real problem here.
These devils and their monsters are the biggest frowny-faces I have EVER seen. None of them were happy, not even when they scored a hit on one of us.
They were also awfully vulnerable to Pinkamena playing with their heads, when she guessed their bents. That's what I call it; they were bent; I could see this now, like someone had reached into them and grabbed their hearts and twisted it into evil balloon animals.
I felt terrible for them and wondered who had done it. Pinkamena could see it too; it's how she could reach into their hearts, grab the jaggedy bits and twist.
I could see her heart too; someone had reached into it and bent it around too. But there were some soft spots; it wasn't all hardened like with the devils. For her friends. For Marjorie. For me. That made me smile.
I didn't know how I knew this. I can usually intuitively sense what makes people happy, but I could see deeper now. Was it my Element?
I looked at Twilight and I could see her love of knowledge, her desire to prove the strength and skill of that love, her affection for Spike, her... what a mess that is. She had a wound, from the whole business with Marcus. It's healing but it's still there. But for now, she had forgotten it, the current crisis taking priority. She loves us; we are all in her heart, and seeing the tiny me inside her made me smile.
I was tempted to look at everyone, but even I knew I had to focus. Thoughtfully, I began misplaying my instruments. Many of my friends looked annoyed but the devils REALLY hated it, plugging ears or trying to kill me harder. I dodged fire and ice, plunking random notes and playing different tunes on different instruments.
Now they were REALLY mad and I had to kick a few of them back into play. Marjorie's eyes derped for a few seconds and Twilight's teeth were chittering. Dawn Gleaming too.
"Can you please get in tune?" Captain Keen Eyes asked urgently.
This is going to be tricky, I realized.
Marjorie seized an on-rushing tide of beetles and flung them into a pack of howling monkeys (on fire) who devoured them. "Dawn Gleaming, study the gate. We need a way to close it, or eventually, they will overwhelm us."
"If you're really an Immortal, can't you just close it?" Spike said.
Now she looked quite irritated. "I am not part of the Council of Intrusion. I have never seen a portal to the Nightmare Dimension. And your mistress didn't do any better."
"We don't have time to fight each other," I said quickly. "We can have a pillow fight later to resolve this. Can you call this council?"
For some reason, Applejack looked at me oddly. I studied myself, but I am not covered in eggs this time.
I'd tell you, but it would take far too long.
"I would have to depart and by the time I rousted them out, you might all die and they'd break through," Marjorie said. "And the Elements of Power would be vulnerable to whatever is affecting them." She grimaced. "I will not let what is mine be taken away from me," she said fiercely. "Not by devils, not by the Nightmare Dimension, not by ANYONE."
I could feel her heart throb with determination and her followers all smiled, clearly pleased by her devotion to them, though really, being that possessive never ends well.
"I suppose Spike's spell wouldn't work all the way to the Moon," Marcus said, cutting off a devil's head; it dissolved away, which was rather creepy.
"There are protections against surprise visitors which would stop him and stop me going straight to them," Marjorie said tensely.
"Ahah!" Dawn Gleaming said. "I have an idea! If all the unicorns pool their strength, we can shake up the rubble which underlays this part of the city, cause a massive sinkhole and create a physical barrier to buy us some time!"
This worked quite well, though soon our foes began herding monsters to fall into the pit so as to plug it up.
That's one of the most horrible things I've ever seen and I felt determined to close this hole before anyone else got hurt.
"Maybe the Applejacks and Pinkamena and I could hitch ourselves to the edges, pull it tight, and then the Rarities could sew it shut," I said, trying to be helpful.
"How exactly would you hitch yourself to the edge?" Dawn Gleaming asked. "It's an energy field, type III."
"Maybe the Elements of Harmony together can do what I could not," Twilight mused.
Dragonfly and Fluttershy were talking some kind of druid tree plant talk thing. It went WOOSH over my head, circled around, went WOOSH again, then when I wasn't looking it tapped me on the shoulder.
And when I turned?
WWWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHH!!!!!
"We need chaos," Dragonfly said. "Chaotic energies on a large scale to cancel the Nightmare Law. Twilight is strongly aligned to Law, therefore she only fed its power."
"But I am of a Sphere aligned to Law," Marjorie said, frustrated. "Where are we going to get enough Chaos?"
"Pinkie," Twilight and Marcus said in unison. "And my sword and I," Marcus said. "Which by extension would mean Sammy too."
"We have a whole chaos firing cannon but the Slaad got too tired from the first shot," Scootaloo said, frustrated. Her head was sticking out of Dash's saddlebags.
"HEY, I told you to GO IN THE SHIP," Rainbow Dash said frantically, staring at her in shock.
"You didn't seriously think I'd do that, did you? I HAVE A CUTIE MARK NOW. I CAN FLY! This is going to ROCK!" she crowed.
"Get back in the bag until this is over or your mother will KILL ME," Dash said, trying to shove her down.
"I hate to say it," Marcus said slowly, "But the Cutie Mark Crusaders are one of the biggest sources of Chaos we have."
"I can't put my sister in this kind of danger!" Clarity and Rarity both said, then looked at each other.
"I bet if we did a double rainbow, THAT would close this gate," Scootaloo said.
"BACK IN THE BAG," Dash said; she and Crash both tried to cram Scootaloo back down but she kept popping up.
I was about to help them as it looked fun, but then I remembered, I have to close this gate.
"Pinkamena, you have to help me," I told her.
"I am not very chaotic as you may have noticed," she said, frowning as the pit slowly filled up.
Marjorie's nostrils flared. "Baalzebul is coming. I will have to engage him."
Marcus made a strangled noise and Sammy buried his face in his hands.
"It doesn't matter," I told her. "Marcus, turn your sword into a needle. You too, Sammy."
He blinked, concentrated, then stared in surprise at his sword as it turned into a giant needle. Sammy did the same.
"Applejack, make a rope out of honesty. Apple Blossom, make one out of elegance," I said. "Rarity, Clarity, use your powers to make thread. First you're going to sew the pull lines to the edge of the portal, then we'll pull it shut and you will sew it in place. Then Dragonfly and Fluttershy will grow a trellis of vines in a grid to hold it together and Dash and Crash will warp the woof with rainbows," I said.
"We'll do WHAT?" Crash said. "That sounds kind of obscene," she said. "I have a boyfriend!"
Rarity crossed her arms in a t shape. "Warp and woof are the two kinds of threads in a weaving. You'll wiggle the rainbows through her frame."
"And Dawn Gleaming and I?" Twilight asked me.
"How the hay do I make a rope out of honesty?" Applejack asked.
A good question to which I do not actually have an answer. "Improvise," I told her. It's what I do best, after PARTY party PARTY.
"You two and Marjorie and Sammy and Spike and Spikey and Marcus will have to fend off our foes while they try to kill us, and then kind of capstone what we do," I said. "I think you'll know what to do when the time comes."
"And me?" Scootaloo asked.
"I need a substitute rubber chicken," I teased her.
She kicked me and I had it coming so I didn't mind. "You will need to defend Marjorie from incoming monsters," I said.
Scootaloo hopped onto Marjorie's back. "Let's kick some ASS!" she said.
Marjorie tensed, then said, "You are an enthusiastic young filly," softly.
"HELL YEAH!"
"This is very dangerous, you know."
"I know. But that means winning is more AWESOME when I beat the odds."
Majorie got an odd look on her face, then said, "Well, let's roll the dice, then." She drew herself up, then opened fire on the devils trying to fill the pit with monsters.
And so we began.
*************
Marcus-O-Vision:
Standing in the breach, I could feel the difference between the world beyond and our world. Here, law is on the defensive against chaos, its worst tendencies less well represented while chaos has fallen prey to its worst tendencies and is less about freedom and more about selfishness and destruction. Law and good are not synonomous, but law is more inclined towards good.
In the Nightmare Dimension, Law is corrupted into Order, as our world's Chaos has become Entropy. Chaos are the heroic rebels against evil authority. And we stand before that authority unleashed. I can feel the Chaos in me responding to it. It HATED it. I could feel my contrary side, the part of me that wouldn't let me bow to Marquetta when it would have made me less likely to die, rising up in defiance.
But it wasn't easy. The strength of Law, doubly of Order, is its monomaniacal focus, its utter certainty, its lack of doubt, its focusing of its entire resources on what it chooses to do. Thus, though Chaos may drive Order back, though Entropy may drive Law back, in the end, neither Chaos nor Entropy can focus or cooperate enough to finish the job. Whereas, outside pressure causes Law and Order to cooperate even more intensely to push back.
When Chaos is too strong, it becomes a thug, destroying without creating. But when Law becomes too strong, it becomes a bully, pushing others around and remolding them to its vision. I remembered Twilight's words to Marjorie. "Anyone who relies only on their strength to get their way is no princess, nothing more than a bully," she had said. "You might be stronger," Twilight had continued. "But you are not better. You misuse your strength instead of using it to defend others. I will not bow. None of us will bow."
I had not been strong enough to stand on my own against Marjorie's will, but Twilight had. But her strength, it was the strength of Law. It was born of patience and hard work, a keen mind honed to perfection by long practice, through specialization and finding her place. And through her network of friends, who always strengthened her, present or not. Personal strength knotted together with that of others to form the collective strength of Law. So long as her connections to her friends hold, Twilight can not be broken by Immortal or mortal alike. Beaten, slain, yes, for she is not invincible. But she will not be broken. You cannot force her to bow to you.
Rarity's strength came from Law as well. She is precise, deft, orderly in word and deed. Like Twilight, she has honed her skills to a fine edge and they give her strength. Where Pinkie, our little bundle of kindly Chaos, cannot stand formal occassions, Rarity thrives in them. They reward her fine qualities. And on top of all of that, she is a generous soul, free and helpful with her gifts, and I love her more than I have loved in a long time.
But sometimes we clash, for I am Chaos and she is Order, I have been a free spirit and she turns always to the habits of work and discipline and the rewards of industry that her father gave her. While I have always had rather an eye for the main chance. The adventuring life is high risk but the rewards are huge for short term, though dangerous work. I would rather be wealthy than work to get it. This is why I always went back in the dungeon rather than settle down.
And Chaos cannot stand before the tide. That is not its strength. To take on the enemy head on, holding always firm and stable, that is the way of Law. But like Pinkie, I feel that call of Chaos, if not so dramatically as her. My strength is my flexibility, my inventiveness, to find people's levers and push them.
Even Baalzebul has levers. As a creature of Order, he ESPECIALLY has levers, because he can't escape his nature. "What do we know about Baalzebul?" I asked.
Twilight called forth a small army of tentacles which began grabbing monsters and devils and crushing them. "He's the enemy of Mephistopheles and Dispater, and he's married to Baftis and Lilith," she said. "He looks roughly human and he's obssessed with perfect creation. He wants to build the perfect city, but it's never good enough."
"He's coming. I can feel him," Marjorie said, grabbing creatures with magic and hurling them out of the pit across the city.
"Baftis is very subservient but is rumored to have been imprisoned by Baalzebul for defying him when he lost patience with yet another city and destroyed it. He fights a lot with his current consort, Lilith, who used to be Moloch's consort before Moloch foolishly defied Asmodeus, the Lord of the Devils. She's beautiful and strong-willed and is worshipped by a lot of witches and people seeking magic, beauty, or both," Dawn Gleaming said, hurling lightning through a mob of green chitinous insectoid monsters being herded towards the pit.
I glanced back and saw Pinkie and Pinkamena rolling around in strands of taffy as Sir Lintsalot, Rocky, and Mr. Turnip tried to disentangle them and Madame LeFlour cast spells into the taffy, which got more plentiful as a result. It throbbed with the power of Chaos. Pinkie was laughing and Pinkamena looked... overwhelmed, really.
Dash and Rainbow Crash were throwing rainbows back and forth, while Scootaloo... I won't pretend I understand what exactly she was doing but she kept running between them as more and more rainbow formed between them. She was supposed to stick close to Marjorie, but being Scootaloo, so much for following orders.
Rarity and Clarity were busy tentatively testing how to thread the sword-needles through the edge of the portal, while Captain Keen Eyes stood protectively between them and the onrushing hordes of Deviltry, shelling them with arrows.
Applejack and Apple Blossom were drinking orange brandy and looking somewhat frustrated; I'll say I have no more idea how to make a rope out of honesty or elegance than they do.
"Rarity," I said to her. "I think they need help."
Rarity nodded and she and Clarity turned to Applejack and Apple Blossom while Dawn Gleaming and Twilight continued to brief me on Baalzebul and we all blew things up with magic.
Rarity went to Apple Blossom to my surprise, Clarity to Applejack. "It is so nice to see another pony who appreciates fashion," Rarity said to Apple Blossom, who smiled.
"Clarity means well, but she is all work and no play, except with Spikey," Apple Blossom said. "But we understand that elegance is *fun*, that to look good and be stylish is something to enjoy. It requires work but in the sense being good at sports is work. Work to achieve better enjoyment." Her Element began to shine.
"A hard working pony like you is someone I can admire," Clarity said, and now Applejack looked first surprised, but then pleased.
"I hafta say you're a pony of great skill," Applejack said to Clarity. "Industry's a virtue I respect." Her Element began to shine softly.
"Your lasso can snare things like ghosts and clouds, which a normal rope would pass through, right?" Clarity said to Applejack.
Applejack nodded. "My mother passed it on to me," she said. "It once got used to snare four ghosts at once and throw them into a river. Story's too long to tell right now with wolves at the door, to speak, though."
"You can tell me later," Clarity said warmly. "Then this will be our basis. We will weave hard work and honesty into it, and I will use it as my rope and Rarity can use Apple Blossom's. Show me."
Soon Applejack was spinning her rope around and doing tricks at Clarity's command.
Meanwhile, Rarity said to Apple Blossom, "What is your favorite item of clothing?"
Apple Blossom produced a supremely fancy dress, clearly unsuitable for use in the field or any sort of fighting, eight layered and I honestly have no idea how an Earth Pony could even get it on.
"We will have to unravel this and make an elegant thread with it," Rarity said. "I promise you, I will make you another to whatever specifications you like, but you will have to give this up in order for us to make it."
Apple Blossom stared at the dress, horrified by the idea. "It's so beautiful," she said softly. "Aunt Orange gave it to me." Her voice trembled.
"I know it is not easy," Rarity said. She now pulled out the dress she wore the night we danced together. I couldn't help but stare and then remember that. "I wore this the first time Marcus and I danced together. The first time we kissed. When he became a pony for my sake. Because he loved me. It is precious to me."
Apple Blossom stared at it, eyes wide.
"I will unravel it and weave it together with your precious dress. Together we will make a thread so strong that no force can sever it, and our sacrifice will enable you to pull this gateway shut," Rarity said, shivering a little.
I touched my hat, which Rarity gave me, and now I felt guilty I still had it.
She noticed and shook her head at me. I would contribute otherwise. This was her gift, of her essence, for she is the Element of Generosity. "Elegance and Generosity must go together, for to those who have been given much, to them is the duty to give generously of what they have received. I give up this dress, but the memory of that night, I will forever treasure in my heart. You remember when she gave it to you, right?"
That memory, though is a lie. She is a creation. A shadow of possibility made flesh by Marjorie's power and Keraptis' arts. In the face of stern Order, she and the others would dissolve if Marjorie did not sustain them.
But to her, it is real and the sacrifice... How can we know that WE are not but shadows to beings more real than ourselves? Called forth by their will and dispersed as easily?
And they must know now, they are shadows. That they could evaporate at any time. But they do not despair. I could see Fluttershy and Dragonfly together, singing songs and growing plants. Dragonfly's clearly not good at it; she's more in tune with weather than animals, I think. But together, Fluttershy could call them forth and Dragonfly nurture them with the light and water they need; her hoofs struck rock and it became soil in which they grew.
If anyone had reason for despair, it is them, but they will not give up.
And if shadows can fight, so much harder must we.
And then, as I glanced at Sammy, I understood. He is a being of law. He is focused and disciplined and steady by contrast to myself. There has to be a way for us to use that.
Apple Blossom let out a great sigh. "Together," she said. "Let it be done before I lose the will to say yes."
And then Rarity began to unravel the two dresses and twine them together into a great cord.
Meanwhile, Clarity now took threads from her bag and with Spikey and Spike both helping her, she began weaving them into the rope, while Applejack twirled it around like some sort of weaving machine. Studying it, I could see she was using Applejack's tail like a needle, the tricks were like operating a sewing machine or maybe a loom with Applejack as the bobbin. As Applejack expressed her true self, she fed power into the rope, and as Clarity's hard work paid off, the rope became ever more powerful from her as well.
I now came up with a plan. Whether I would survive it...
That's another question.
***********
Twilight's Letter to the Reader:
Marcus' plan made sense, but really, it should be Rarity doing this with him. However, she has to sew the gate shut while we attempt psychological warfare on an Immortal. Hopefully this will be a mortal identity but we may well have bored into his home plane.
Well, not US but the gate maker.
In which case... No, I will be brave. I could smell Marcus' terror and I hoped that Baalzebul does not have pony level senses. He didn't show it, but I could smell it.
We gulped down the candy and he turned into Dispater and I turned into Lillith. Dispater is tall, 21 hands high, and Lillith fairly tall too; he looked mostly human, though not like Marcus, with a short beard and a shaved head and tiny horns. I, on the other hand, screamed 'DEVIL' with red skin and large horns and a tail and everything. I was also fairly naked and Marcus tried not to look at me. I put an illusion on my crown and made illusionary clothing just to avoid making him uncomfortable.
Which would give us away, too.
Having to pretend to be secret lovers bothered me, both from not wanting to hurt Rarity and from it reminding me of how I had loved him once. Part of me still did. Everyone says that never totally fades, but I need it to. How can I be a good friend to both of them when I feel things like this?
But there's no one else here to do this except Dawn Gleaming and she has a boyfriend.
They'd hitched the magical ropes already when Baalzebul came with his guard of pit fiends. Apple Blossom, Applejack, Pinkie, and Pinkamena were pulling the gateway shut as it tried to fight them, and Rarity and Clarity stood ready to sew. Dash, Crash, Dragonfly, and Fluttershy stood ready to further seal the gate. We'd rigged the taffy as a line of defense at the lip of the pit in front of us, though I'm not sure exactly how that works.
The hard part of this is that we have to hold the line until the gate is almost shut, then duck in and let it slam, but stay here long enough to prevent anyone getting in to wedge it open.
And Marcus doesn't have his sword. If something goes wrong...
No. Trust in my friends. That is my strength. Pinkie's plan is WORKING. I do not understand how but I don't... Okay, I really, really want to understand how it works. But I can find out later, once the world is safe.
Marjorie looked confident but I can't tell if that's arrogance or properly based in reality. She is an Immortal, though. Ideally, she'll cancel out Baalzebul and the rest of us will handle the enemy long enough.
I could feel Baalzebul's power before I saw him and... the amulet! I still had it. I checked it. He was at full strength. But he can't cross over into our world without alerting every Immortal, right? And Marjorie...
Is a lot weaker than him.
I winced, then made myself not wince. We can do this. Nightmare Moon was an immortal. The elements united, we can't be defeated and now, it's not just us, it's the Elements of Power too.
Working with them instead of against them feels so good. It's Harmony in action.
It's *right*.
We can do this.
Baalzebul was a tall man, only slightly devilish looking, wearing a suit of bronze armor over most of his body. He rode on a creature which resembled a giant fly. It buzzed constantly and he smelled TERRIBLE. This form doesn't smell well, but I could smell him.
"Dispater, your presence here is a violation of the laws of the Hells. Lillith, what are you doing here?" he said.
I was doing my best to draw power and feed it through us so we would 'smell' Immortal. With the Element of Magic, I could do it; Marjorie had advised us to do it.
I embraced Dispater. "Baalzebul, you fool," I told him. "I am going to take your plane as the Hag Countess took Moloch's," I said, hoping I got that right. It's a long sordid story of 'love' (what Devils call love) and betrayal and stupid revolts against Asmodeus. "You will die fighting these mortals and then we will turn on them and be rewarded for stopping their 'invasion' of this plane. And being ponies, they're so stupidly trusting that they'll walk right into it!" I was speaking in the language of the Hells thanks to a spell Marjorie cast. I hoped it came off convincing.
"Hi, I'm Twilight Sparkle, a very trusting pony," Dawn Gleaming said. "Not nearly as cool as Dawn Gleaming but she was busy mastering yet another spell I don't know yet, and couldn't come to the invasion. I wasn't doing anything useful, so here I am to smite you!"
My leg twitched but I pretended to ignore it, since Lillith wouldn't care.
'Dispater' (Marcus) fondled my shoulder and I shivered, feeling odd.
"Also, I advised Baftis to defy you, telling her you'd respect her more if she was stronger. Oh, what a foolishly trusting sucker she was. And now you've imprisoned her in the ruins you built over, where she will stay, since you're going to die here. Best of all, if we die, this isn't our home plane, so we won't stay dead," I told him. "I have bound myself to Malboge. But you never noticed."
"I noticed," he said. He pulled out a gem and crushed it. "And there goes your tie. If I die, you go with me, TRAITOR. Do you think I did not anticipate this? The only question was who you would spread your legs for, you whore!"
I suddenly wondered if we'd managed to somehow make up a real plot or if he was just that paranoid.
Baalzebul smiled angrily, dark blue eyes flashing. "I can see your surprise. Did you think me a fool? The Hag Countess has fallen and Glasya rules there now. She did not want you having influence over her plane. She was quite amenable to root out your anchor and pass it to me, and the power of the daughter of Asmodeus is not so easily noticed if she does not wish it to be."
Glasya... Asmodeus has a daughter? I think the Hag Countess got turned into a house or something... I forget why. Or how she got to be the boss when Moloch got overthrown.
Then he turned to Marjorie. "You are bold but foolish. Your Immortal allies cannot save you here. By entering this realm, you belong to me. I will enjoy tearing you down and rebuilding you."
She looked nervous, but then she said, "You are going to die. You tore a hole into our world and now you will pay for it."
Baalzebul waggled a finger. "Now, now, it was one of your people who opened the way. It always has to be, since the Compact."
The Compact is a poorly kept peace treaty between our dimension and the Nightmare dimension. Among other things, mortals on the other side have to open the way, though covert agents and accidents happen sometimes too.
The gateway was shrinking. If we are fortunate, he'll keep threatening us until we're ready to escape. I could feel Clarity and Rarity starting to work, felt the gate getting smaller. Not too much longer and we'll be able to retreat.
"I will not let you take what is mine!" Marjorie shouted, but this time, she meant the whole world. She is so fierce, and even Baalzebul was taken aback.
Now he gestured and the pit suddenly healed, sealing up, full of rubble but crossable. "I am the lord of the Seventh Layer of Hell! Those who would challenge me here are FOOLS."
Let's hope he's not right.
Then we got hit by a wave of his power. Our disguises were ripped away and we both turned back to normal. Sammy and Dawn Gleaming started to dissolve, but Marjorie managed to save them. She growled angrily and now breathed a huge gout of fire at Baalzebul and company.
This did nothing at all.
In fact, I think they enjoyed it.
"Retreat," Marjorie said to Dawn Gleaming and Sammy. Her voice brooked no denial.
"I can't just abandon you!" Dawn Gleaming said urgently as our foes rushed forwards.
"He can destroy you utterly beyond my power to remake you and I will NOT HAVE THAT," Marjorie said fiercely. "I did not make you so that some fool could destroy you with his conjuring tricks."
Conjuring tricks?
Baalzebul looked VERY unhappy, though he now pointed at Marcus and I. "I commend you on a good lie! Swear to me and I will spare you! I can use someone both clever and powerful!"
I suspect he's lying. "Ponies bow to no one!" I said proudly. I felt his aura rush at me but it skidded off my power. This both pleased me and scared me a little. I've grown so strong. But this road eventually leads away from everything I've known. I want to make Celestia proud, I want to protect ponykind. But this kind of power, it always cut me off from others. Though some of that was my own fault.
I could have had friends before this, but I let those who did hate me drive me away from those I could have been friends with. Lyra, Octavia, Moondancer and others.
I couldn't do this without everyone else. I can't walk this road without them. I hope they all will walk it with me. I need them. I'm not used to needing people. Except my parents and Celestia.
But I need them all. When they hurt, it hurts me. When they smile, I smile. The bond I have with them is so precious to me, I don't even have words for it.
I have *a* word. Friendship. But it's... it's more than that.
No, not in a bad love story sort of way.
We complete each other. Friendship makes us all more than we are. With them by my side, I can face anything. *For* them, I can face anything.
Baalzebul had a mace and now Marcus concentrated and it flopped around in his hand. "I serve Princess Celestia and Princess Luna and I love Rarity, the Element of Generosity!" Marcus shouted. "None of us will bend knee to you, Lord of the Flies!"
"Then, DIE," he said and his word of power reached out and grasped Marcus and tried to kill him but I shattered the spell with a thought, outraged, power flowing through me.
"Go," Marjorie said again to Dawn Gleaming and Sammy. "You would die before I could save you if he did that to you."
They retreated, but they looked very guilty about it. She looked relieved and then she hurled lightning; a half dozen pit fiends went flying; the power was incredible. She could cut loose here, not hold back as she must on Mystara to avoid getting in trouble.
But Baalzebul suddenly appeared right next to Marjorie, then smacked her with his mace and she went flying back through the gateway.
"..." I stared in shock as she cried out in surprise.
"Run, you fools!" Pinkamena shouted at the two of us.
He moved smoothly to cut us off, but now the taffy rose up and lashed at him like a snake, holding him for several seconds, burning him. He flailed and Marcus and I both got flung by massive amounts of power in opposite directions as the world began to ripple and buckle. The taffy burned away but now Baalzebul sort of... melted. He became this hideous giant slug monster, still clutching his mace with a pseudopod, but his beauty and grace were gone like the masks they were.
This was the form Asmodeus had punished him with for past rebellion. He must be able to take on a prettier form for a while but his concentration lapsed.
He turned his hideous multi-faceted eyes on us and his aura hit us like hammers, now fully unleashed. Captain Keen Eyes fired through the sliver of gate remaining but the arrows just bounced off his eyes. So did a half dozen apples and a hurled bottle of orange brandy, though the liquid briefly blinded him.
"Come on!" Pinkie shouted urgently.
"Baalzebul," Pinkamena said grimly. "I think you need to change your name to Lord of the Midden. You smell like yesterday's vomit. *Cat vomit*."
"Oooh, I think it's more like when you try freebasing sugar mixed with cinnamon and it BURNS IT BURNS and then you try to wash it out with vinegar and you accidentally drink it and you get GAS and you start drifting high into the sky until pegasi find you and then... it all comes out at once and they all nearly die." Pinkie made a face. "Never do that, by the way."
I see.
He gave a howl of rage and we tried to run but he just kind of arched over us, blocking our escape. But then Marjorie leaped on him, kicking and biting and howling and spewing fire everywhere.
Unfortunately, now his pit fiends were coming at us. Huge red-skinned and muscular, giant bat wings, horns, fangs, swords and whips. I flung one into another, driving back a third with lightning.
Marcus, on the other hand, wasn't strong enough to hurt them much with magic but kept trying to lure them away from me.
"Marcus, run," I told him. Without his sword, he can't defend himself; I'm sure it would hurt them but his magic isn't strong enough.
"I am not going to leave you here!," he shouted. "I can't make it up to you if you die!"
"You can't make it up to me if YOU die," I shouted, flinging back a pit fiend about to stab him. "Rarity, how is it coming?"
"We're ready to close it!" she shouted. "Get out of there!"
"Princess Marjorie, we need to retreat!"
Only we couldn't. She was tangled up with Baalzebul as they fought in hideous immortal slugfest. He was oozing acid on her and she was battering and chewing on him, lost in a fighting frenzy.
Marcus looked at her, looked at the gate.
We could leave her here. I can tell he's tempted. I'm a little tempted, to my embarrassment. She's caused us so much trouble... she was going to start a war between Equestria and Sind! Many innocents would have died.
I couldn't understand why she was made an immortal.
But I see why, now. Colored dragons value fiercess, strength of will, defending what is yours, and cunning. And she embodies all of those. But those values don't have to be used to hurt the innocent. They can be used to defend our world, to defend those important to you.
They're not the general virtues of ponies.
But this world isn't just ponies. If I am to be an immortal, I will have to deal with beings that don't share our values. To work with all the Spheres against the things that would come from outside to destroy us.
Even to work with enemies. Because we all have bigger enemies, and this world belongs to all of us.
Celestia's mother is Loki. He's a terrible person.
He's on our side when it comes to dealing with things like this.
Baalzebul would make our entire world into his city, then destroy it over and over when it failed to please him.
Marjorie... she's like a child with the power of a god. Did she even really understand what she was doing, trying to get even with us? Can she even help it? Other creatures don't think like we do, as I have become aware with Marcus, with Ivan, with Spike, though he's pretty close to a pony in all but body. Are all colored dragons like that?
But she's starting to change. She cares about the Elements of Power, even though she made them as tools. And they care about her. They were made to, but... do they have free will?
I glanced at Pinkamena, who looked horrified by Marjorie and Baalzebul's fight. She believes she grew up with a family who didn't care. But Marjorie cared, and she loves Marjorie.
Like I love Celestia.
I don't know if we'll ever be real friends. But we have to be able to work together one day, much as Immortals sometimes squabble and fight. And maybe this will turn her energies in more productive directions.
"We have to save her," I told Marcus.
"She wants me dead," he said softly.
"NEVER," I said hotly, then felt embarrassed. "I won't let her hurt you but she is an Immortal and we cannot abandon her when she fights for our friends and our world."
For a moment, he looked haunted, then looked back at everyone and then said softly, "I should come back if I die, but if I do not, take care of Rarity."
"You are NOT going to die," I told him.
Baalzebul slammed Marjorie down and began hammering her; I could barely keep his devils back, even with my Element going full tilt. But everyone was pinned down being ready to close the gate.
Baalzebul reared up to strike Marjorie down with a pseudopod. But as the blow came down, a lance stabbed into him and he howled. Sir Lintsalot and Rocky stood over her defiantly, and then Mr. Turnip hurled a cabbage at his face, and Madame LeFlour conjured salt and dumped it on him; he howled as it burned his slug-like flesh. Pinkamena said, "I will DIE BEFORE I LET YOU KILL HER! SHE CARES ABOUT ME!"
And then, grimly, she began to sing and dance and I felt magic; she was trying to trap him with the Irresistable Dance spell.
It bounced off him. He's an Immortal, not easily compelled, especially not by a construct.
Marcus stared at her; he looked at me, then looked determined. He took Pinkamena by the hands and wove his magic with hers. "Use us as your focus," he told me, and I understood.
I reached out to the others and we joined powers. The Elements of Power joined their power to ours as well and then our power flowed through Marcus and Pinkamena into the spell and Baalzebul began to dance to his utter horror and as he danced, he screamed, for Chaos was flowing into him.
Pinkamena and Marcus looked very strained by this. Neither of them was made for this much power. And then Baalzebul struck at them, hurling balls of fire at them.
And then there was a flash of light and Rarity interposed herself, firing a barrage of arrows which melted but stopped the attack. I could see she'd passed Marcus' sword to Fluttershy.
Why Fluttershy?
***************
Fluttershy's Point of View:
"Dragonfly," I said. "If I die, you have to take care of Angel Bunny and Slither."
She blinked. "If you die, it probably means we will both die."
"I don't think our lives are linked," I told her. At least, if they are, my powers from Mother Nature aren't telling me any such thing.
"I mean, if you die, it likely means the entire group is going down," she said. "That being said, if you intend to kill our foe with that sword, I am in. His city is an abomination in the eyes of nature. Every tree is gone, the grass, the sky itself choked with smoke and flame... Nature groans in chains and howls for revenge." She got increasingly angry, which made me more nervous.
"If you're going to kick some ass, we're in," Rainbow Dash said.
"YEAH!" Scootaloo said, sticking her head out of the bag.
"GET IN THE BAG," Rainbow Dash said, trying to push her back down. "Your mother has very sharp teeth, you know!"
Dragonfly and I both stared, mouth open wide, for the first time united in common thought.
"What exactly have you been doing with my mom?" Scootaloo said suspiciously.
"Don't you have a boyfriend?" Rainbow Crash said suspiciously.
"Don't you all need to stay here and be ready to seal the gate?" Apple Blossom said. But she looked at Marjorie, who was writhing in pain on the ground, and looked very worried.
"Fluttershy, PLAN, NOW," Rainbow Dash said. "And I didn't do anything with your mom! She got mad at me and... forget I ever said anything!" She waved her hooves around frantically.
"Oh my," Dragonfly and I said in unison, then blinked.
"I need you to cover me while I heal Marjorie, then we're going to destroy the city," I said. "Or at least... some of it. A little of it." I felt very nervous about this. It was hideous and evil but even devils need a place to live. One set of instincts said to destroy it and another that I shouldn't and I wasn't sure which was right.
"I bet I could set the surrounding area on fire... but I think they like that," Dragonfly said excitedly, then deflated.
"Building levelling coming right..."
A giant buzzing fly had been wandering around confused after its master... got off it? Fell off? I hadn't noticed. But now it was about to dive bomb Rarity, who was too busy parrying attacks from Beelzebub to notice.
"Fly, now!" Rainbow Dash said and launched. Rainbow Crash and her charged into the fly, slammed into it and crashed off through buildings, sending bricks and rock and bolts flying everywhere.
Clarity looked indecisive, then turned to Spikey. "What do you think?"
"I think everyone on our team needs to stand ready to close the gate or else Beelzebub may erase you while Princess Marjorie is down, even though..." He grimaced. "She's hurt."
"You all throw supporting fire and be ready for more sealing, since the gate's mostly shut," Applejack said. "I'm gonna go plant some horseshoe marks in some devil butts. Dragonfly, you'd better stay here."
"I have to go," she said.
"We will hold the gate," Dawn Gleaming said. "Dragonfly, you can lay down supporting lightning from here. If we evaporate, we're no use to the Princess."
I couldn't wait any longer. I charged out with Applejack covering me. She kicked away a devil covered in chains and hooks and axes and spears, then grabbed one of his chains with her teeth, spun him around and tangled up a huge red devil thing and threw them both at a huge fat one with a massive spear and they all tumbled away.
I ran with a sword in my teeth and I jabbed it into the ground long enough to cast some healing on Marjorie, who now stared at me, eyes wide. "You healed me," she said softly.
"We're on the same side against deviltry," I told her. "And I cannot stand to see someone as hurt as you were." Her coat charred, her flesh torn and bleeding... it had been horrible.
"Even though I tried to kill you," she said softly.
"We're not enemies any more," I said.
She started at that, and then looked guilty. She rose now over me and said, "I see why you bear that." Then she pointed where I had stuck the sword.
A tiny vine was growing up through the rock where it had struck and the rocks and bricks around it were crumbling into soil. Applejack looked, then grinned and reached in her pack, throwing a bag of seeds to me. "Some of my finest, I carry 'em for emergencies."
Marjorie clearly didn't understand why Applejack does that, but I understand. "Applejack, you are a dear friend and I thank you," I told her. Sword in teeth, I carved the ground and as I moved, Applejack planted seeds. They were already sprouting a little, even as Marjorie turned and spat lightning at Baalzebul. Soon she, Twilight, and Rarity were having a huge magical / energy / missile battle as Marcus and Pinkamena continued to dance, distracting Baalzebul's concentration.
Then the Dashes and Scootaloo came back. "Scootaloo," I said. "Can you grip a sword in your mouth?"
"I can try!"
"Dashie, I need lots of rain." Maybe that was too demanding. "If you don't mind."
Rainbow Dash and Crash now went to work making rain, while the battle raged near us. Dawn Gleaming and Dragonfly had some sort of lightning throwing contest, I think, in fact.
It made me rather nervous, but I tried to focus myself and keep plowing the ground. As I worked, I noticed the tilled ground spread further the more I worked at it, so I worked harder and it spread even more.
Unfortunately, this drew the attention of some giant with a trident and two heads and four tails. He rushed right at me, though Dashie jumped on a cloud and made lightning hit him. He stumbled and I dodged his attack, then Applejack bucked the back of his leg; she couldn't actually reach his knee. He stumbled, his knee dipped and she hit it; he fell and Dragonfly now dropped more lightning on him and he passed out.
I took the sword, moved to the middle of my work, then jabbed it into the ground and began to pray, focusing my power through it and calling upon Mother Nature to bring her power to this cold, dead world. This sword came from her sphere, the sphere of Matter, my sphere, for it is not just the sphere of earth and rock but of all that lives and grows within that, the sphere of life in all its shapes and forms.
This world had been scourged of life and left only with death and despair.
It was up to me to return it to greater balance, if only for a little while. I am not so vain as to think my power can overthrow a Master of Devils.
But this is how I can fight him. Not by drawing blood or hitting people.
But by championing life in the face of death, for that is the call of the druid. Death has its place; but the death we embrace is part of the cycle of life. In time, I will die and my body will become food for worms who will return it to the soil and from that soil, beautiful trees will grow, to purify the air and turn soil into fruit for animals. They will scatter the seeds of the trees and more trees will grow.
But here, the cycle has been destroyed. There is nothing but endless city, stone piled on metal on stone. Everything that lives suffers at the whims of its hideous master, who cannot stand imperfection.
Life IS imperfection. Druids do not believe in perfection. There is always room to improve but change is constant. You cannot fix things at one point and stay that way forever.
I struggle with that. A part of me wishes the good times would last forever, fears that if they stop, everything will go downhill. I am nervous and change frightens me.
But Druids are bringers of change. We combine law and chaos, for nature is ever changing, yet it changes in predictable cycles. And slowly, those cycles change. The world grows warmer or colder. Species come and go. I mourn for the fallen, for creatures now long gone or dwindled only to remnants in hidden valleys and places time forgot like the Thanegioth Archepelago, where the Isle of Dread is found.
I am not chaotic by nature. I am lawful. In a shy way. Dragonfly rages with change and chaos. She'd do this better than me. But she can't; if she enters Baalzebul's realm, he may well unmake her before Marjorie can save her. Or Pinkie. I don't know how Pinkie did that, but I wish I knew how.
But I have to find that chaos inside me to do this. To force the wheel of time, frozen here to Baalzebul's will to change. The sword can do it a little. I can see the the seeds sprouting.
But it's not enough. I watched Dash and Crash jump from cloud to cloud, making rain and lightning come down, laughing as they go. They have no fear. Crash could be erased with a thought and she is not afraid.
I feel a certain empathy with Marcus, because he understands fear as I do, if for different reasons. And it's one of the reasons I can bond to many of my animal friends. They know fear. To be an herbivore, like many of them are, like ponies are mostly (though we can eat eggs and things made with them), is to know fear. When Blackmoor changed us, they removed a lot of our fear. We have more than humans but less than, say, my mice friends.
Fear is a survival instinct. It's what keeps us alive in a dangerous world. But ponies don't need it as much because, like humans, we're smart enough to make tools and use them, to think our way out of problems, to fight with less fear if we must fight.
Baalzebul rules by fear; I can smell it on his servants. Cunning, fear, lies. This sort of all out assault is only because he didn't have time to think of a good lie and Marcus and Twilight fooled him into becoming too angry to think. But this world is full of violence even if it is not his first choice. Pain. Suffering. Misery. Even the rocks cry out to me for mercy, for release.
I am a healer; when I see pain, I want to end it, to heal it. Even with someone like Marjorie. Who scares me. But her pain... I had to set her free.
This world is pain and I must end it, if only for a little while.
I rose into the air, enough to 'stand' on the sword, a hoof on each crossbar, and I spread my forelegs and wings as I hovered. I became like the trees which would now rise from the land.
And then I heard Dragonfly begin, haltingly, to sing the song I intended to sing, which speeds the growth of plants. She wasn't good at it, for where I am best at growth and healing, she is better at clearing the ground for new growth. But we need that here as well. Her destruction and my creation, together we would turn the wheel.
Her destruction and my creation, in harmony we find our union. My Element began to shine.
I have studied philosophy, I just don't feel the need to talk about it all the time like Twilight and Marcus and Dawn Gleaming and Sammy do. In part because I'm never so sure of being right as they are. Which can be just a little annoying sometimes.
Don't tell them I said that! I didn't...
Okay, I meant it but I don't like to criticize people because I spent too long being criticized all the time. I wasn't fast enough for Father or my uncles and all the boys liked to pick on me and some of the girls at school. Mother always comforted me but it wasn't enough.
Without Dashie, I probably would have gone completely insane. Having someone to stand up for me who wasn't...
I know Mother really loves me. I love her. I love Father. But... parents love their children by their nature. As a druid, I especially know about instincts.
Dashie had no instincts compelling her to be my friend, to love me. But she did anyway, and that was a great comfort to me, rude as she could be sometimes.
Please don't think I hate my parents or something! It's just my nature to fret.
Anyway, druids study nature and part of that is experienced and part of it is intuitive but part of it is learned and deduced too. It gives us a balanced approach instead of trying to learn everything from books.
Some things have to be felt, like the dirt on your hooves and the wind in your mane and the gentle smile of a squirrel whose leg you have just set in a cast. Without me, he would have suffered, maybe even died.
But I changed his life for the better and now he will have many children and hide many nuts.
Every day, I can make this world a better place.
I will make *this* world a better place. For the time that I can. For I know, as a druid, that all things come to an end.
But that end is also a beginning of something new.
And sometimes, something better.
"Applejack, drive your heels into the cracks and push," I said. I'm getting too bossy again. "Please, if you're not busy with anything else."
She nodded and dug in her heels, and now her Element began to glow.
I began to sing and the clouds swirled and lightning struck me but I rode the lightning.
My body changed and my mind as well; I felt Dash and Crash's swirling, wild joy and I felt Scootaloo laughing through my skin, for she had slipped out of the bag and was jumping from cloud to cloud, feeling amazingly grownup. Their joy flowed down through the lightning into me, into the sword, the well of chaos inside us all. I could feel Pinkie Pie's delight at the rain; she loves a good storm, to feel the water on her skin.
I normally run and hide under the bed, but now I felt her joy and I knew it and I changed.
The ground cracked and Baalzebul shouted with rage and turned to stare at me but now Ivan stepped out of the shadows. "He's right here, your highness!" he shouted, laughing, and then a huge red-skinned woman, remarkably naked for a human, though she did wear jewelry, appeared from flames and shouted, "Baalzebul, you have betrayed me and destroyed my anchor! Now you will PAY!"
And a horde of devils charged at him at her command.
I felt the lightning course through me and I welcomed it, drawing its power into the sword, and using it to drive the wheel of change. The seeds sprouted and grew, and the ground cracked and trees rose swiftly. Too swiftly, but the world hungered for them. I could not deny that hunger.
"When the fruit is ripe, you must buck the trees, Applejack," I said. "When she does this, Dash and Crash and Scootaloo, you must whip up winds and fling the fruit as far off across this world as you can in the time we have," I said.
They will take root, breaking up buildings, making soil and spreading themselves. Creatures will eat the fruit and spread the seeds. Perhaps in time, Baalzebul will root them all out.
But I don't think so. Seeds will be buried every time he levels his home, and they will wait, until conditions are right. And eventually, they will be. There will always be little seeds of chaos to disrupt his perfect order. And because he can not make perfection, nor accept anything less, he will be unable to turn his attention to hurt others.
Or so I hope.
And so I called down Mother Nature's power, my heritage as both a Pegasus Pony and a druid and prayed to her, that she might give her gift of life to this dead world.
And she heard me and soon Applejack was busy kicking down quick-grown apples and Rainbow Dash, Crash, and Scootaloo were busy spreading them as far as we could reach.
I could feel Dragonfly's song in the air, calling down power, spreading the roots; they ripped up brick and stone, tore down buildings and turned all around them into soil. She destroyed, but her destruction furthered the growth of life. More water reached the roots and the trees grew faster.
And some of the monsters stirred and stared at the trees and ran to them, their masters chasing them and raging, but the power which pulsed in the trees drove them back, for Chaos flowed through the trees and the devils were creatures of pure Order, unable to abide its touch.
I gave them all the love I had, for they would need it here.
Fly free, my children. Bring joy and healing to this world. Live while you can. Everything dies, but your death will bring new life.
One day, I too will be a tree who helps others. Show them what could be, that they might dream of something better, my friends.
I could feel Mother Nature's gentle embrace, her love and approval and it made me smile. I am part of something greater. We all are, pony and man and devil alike. But now, for once, I could fully feel it. And it felt wonderful.
But I would soon have to let it go. Everything changes in time, especially when channeling chaos.
This must be why Pinkie is always so happy.
And now, for a little while, I was very happy too.
**************
Applejack Speaks:
Seeing the trees come up, it pleased me, even though trees shouldn't grow that fast. But this place needs trees. Every tree was different. They didn't look quite like normal apple trees. But then, normal ones couldn't live here.
Their nature had to change to thrive in new circumstances.
And seeing that, I understood.
Nature ain't a static thing. And what feels natural to me, growin' up in Equestria, ain't necessarily natural somewhere else. Places change. Ponies change. The whole set a' Pony species changed, both by natural causes and manmade. But humans are part a' nature too.
And it ain't like Ponies ain't remade Equestria. We didn't take it as it was, we made it the way we want to be. All the nature of my farm's only natural 'cause other Ponies and I made it that way.
'Cause that's our nature; I dunno if we got it from humans or it just comes with bein' able to think.
Apple Blossom and I both have a hankerin' to reshape our world, to build a little empire, even if mine is apples and pigs and hers is oranges and drinks and whatnot. I've been breedin' apples and my ancestors been breedin' apples for centuries. Maybe millenia. I think one of those wall ponies was the start of the Apple Clan.
What the humans did to us, we've done as well.
I wouldn't do it to nothing that could think; they got the right to decide their own future. But the impulse... the urge to change what happens if thinkin' critters don't intervene... the orchard would go wild and go downhill without me constantly changin' what nature wants.
What we've done is to harmonize it. Nature by itself makes a mess. That's what I've seen in places like the Malpheggi. We put our brains in and make it work for everyone's benefit.
My element shone as I finally understood what I've been doin' my whole life.
And I bucked like I'd never bucked before.
****************
Marcus-O-Vision:
Pinkamena and I continued to dance, Pinkie's power flowing through us to assail Baalzebub, who was trying to fight off Lillith and her supporters, while his minions fought hers.
"I think this is our cue to RUN LIKE HELL," Ivan said urgently to me.
I spun Pinkamena around, then dipped her down low; she is as nimble as Pinkie, which helps this a lot. "I agree. Twilight?"
The ground rose up and formed a gate between us and our exit. In the air, there floated another Master of Devilkind, Dispater, who I had impersonated. "YOU WILL PAY!" he shouted at me.
Then his horde of flying devils went after Dash, Crash, and Scootaloo, while his ground forces rushed at us and he blasted me across the ground with his rod. Pinkamena went tumbling as well.
She rose with an insane grin, despite looking battered and bruised. "Lord Dispater, your plan to kill Beelzebub is going well," she said. "Strike him now and you can easily destroy him!"
"I am not so easily moved around the board by a *fake* Pony," he said and blasted us again, even as I tried to cast a spell.
Twilight sent him tumbling with a huge storm of lightning, but he then caught it with his staff and threw it back at her. She blocked most of it, went tumbling, then had to fight off some pit fiends.
Pinkie tried to charge to our aid but now she was under attack, her instruments getting smashed up.
Battle was raging everywhere and it was too much. We had to get out of here. "Fluttershy, I need my sword!"
She threw it into the air with her teeth, then turned into Flutterdragon, caught it, then crashed through everything in her path to get to me. "I'm so sorry. Oh no, your hat! Oh dear, I hope you didn't pay much for that trident. I'm sorry, that looked like nice armor." And so on.
Ivan had vanished again.
Dispater pointed at Pinkamena and she began to bend and twist and fade. Marjorie was in the throes of fighting a horde of devils and was being driven back.
And then Flutterdragon gave me the sword. I knew what I had to do.
If Pinkamena dissolved, Pinkie would never forgive herself. She'd be broken.
"Get us to Pinkie," I told Flutterdragon and we rode her with me trying to use my magic to keep Pinkamena from dissolving. I was going to lose that fight. I can't match Dispater's power.
But once we reached Pinkie, I handed her the sword. "Pinkie, you have to use the reincarnation spell to make Pinkamena into a real person," I told her. "Let her be reborn with true flesh."
"But what if you need it?" Pinkie said urgently.
"Do it before it's too late!" Pinkamena was down to two dimensions and I felt my power being pushed back.
Pinkie took the sword and hugged it between her and two dimensional Pinkamena, singing urgently. Her element began to glow as she sang of being alone and the friends she'd made for herself and how now she'd found new friends. And Pinkamena was one of them, her sister who she loved.
Pinkamena began to cry, but then she looked determined and she pointed at Dispater. "I do *not* forget or easily forgive. There will be a reckoning," and he laughed with a cruel laughter.
But then Flutterdragon pounced on him. "I'm so sorry to scuff up your nice clothing but you shouldn't be so mean!" she said urgently and I laughed for joy.
What a glorious mess this all was.
There had better be some treasure for this.
Pinkamena turned three dimensional again; she looked brighter. More vivid. Still cranky, but real. She stared at herself.
"Okay, let's get out of here," I said.
The wall burst as our friends on the other side of the gate smashed it open. "Come on!" Dawn Gleaming shouted.
We began a fighting retreat; Pinkie gave me my sword back once they didn't need it. Yet more devils were coming as the storm raged across the city and trees began to grow across it and the land shook with the throes of rebirth.
I then saw Dispater doing a spell which is quite famous and would be quite hideous for us.
Meteor swarm basically dumps a swarm of fireballs on people. Which was going to fry everyone as they withdrew.
Twilight and Dawn Gleaming began a dispel, but I feared it wouldn't be enough. "Flutterdragon, we're going to have to block it," I said. "If you augment yourself with your element, combined with being a gold dragon, we can block most of it."
"But what about you?" she said urgently.
This is going to hurt so much. My common sense chose this moment to reassert itself. I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE MY FIT OF INSANE HEROISM FRIES ME.
Then I saw Rarity withdrawing with the others, shelling arrows down on inrushing monsters.
I can't abandon her.
My safety net is gone. I could fry to ash here.
But this fire will be order-tainted. Which means my sword should help stop it.
If I want to be an Immortal, I can't leave Flutterdragon here alone.
"I won't abandon my friends," I told Flutterdragon and she smiled and then we rushed the fire with me focusing my own fire through the sword.
The good news was that we stopped the fire and everyone escaped.
The bad news was that I don't become more powerful from my determination to protect my friends and the woman I love, so, in fact, I fried.
I'll spare you the excruciating details, but I stopped too much of it with me instead of my sword.
And when I awoke, I was somewhere else.
***************
I woke up in a nice, soft, fluffy bed, wearing a nice soft bathrobe and feeling oddly relaxed for someone who just burned up. "Hello?" I said.
"Hello, Marcus darling," Celestia said. "How daring of you, climbing into my bed." Her voice had her usual teasing tone.
Oh bloody hell. I tried to jump out of bed, but landed on MORE BED.
In fact the bed was HUGE, bigger than some rooms. I am not sure why Celestia needs a bed which is something like twenty by thirty feet. Especially given her human form is only six foot two.
Wow, she's as tall as Helga.
For a moment, I had to be sure this wasn't actually Helga messing with me, but Helga is not as tanned as Celestia, and doesn't have the same diaphanous rainbow hair. She wore not a princess outfit but sturdy black pants, a dark green blouse, a white and yellow vest over that, and she had a nice wide-brimmed hat on an end table nearby. Her feet, though, were bare; brown socks were tossed by the hat, black boots sat on the ground. She was closer to the edge of the bed than me.
"Are we in Canterlot?" I asked groggily, checking myself. I was, in fact, naked, but the second I thought about it, clothing appeared and I now wore a nice travelling outfit and Rarity's hat appeared on my head. More precisely, the one she made me.
"You are in my quarters within my home plane," she said. She reached over and put her socks and hat on, then got off the bed and put her boots on. "Come with me."
I followed her, donning my own boots with a thought. We went out into an ornate hallway, decorated with her mighty deeds, then into a side hallway, which showed my past lives. "We are being recursive," she said.
"What?" I said in confusion. Then I paused. "Hey, I was Maeglin Woodwalker?" I said in surprise.
"Yes," she said, standing by me.
The picture showed a somewhat scarred Elf busy driving back a purple worm (the several hundred foot long kind) with blasts of fire as Elven children ran for cover. Another Elf lurked nearby behind a tree, paging through a book of spells.
"Not very pretty," I said. "But brave." I remember when that happened. My apprentice screwed up and managed to trigger a monster break through at the bad magic point; Alfheim has certain 'knots' in the magic which sustains it and the ones which cause trouble are 'bad magic points'.
"He was your first life," Celestia said, hand on my shoulder. Her presence was comforting. "You had many lives on your quest, all of them relatively brief, because once you grew strong enough to recover the sword again, you were reincarnated. Or if you died in the process."
I touched my sword.
"It will no longer reincarnate you," Celestia said. "But Mother Nature has agreed to waive any further need for reincarnation; the sword was only given that power by Bastet so she could bypass proper channels. You were not formally approved as a candidate due to her meddling."
I winced. "All of that was for nothing?" That really annoyed me.
"Not nothing," Celestia said firmly. She ushered me down to another painting. Bofur Shattershield of the Everrast clan. He was busy disarming a complicated trap on a door in a tunnel while other dwarves kept watch. One of them was Fundin; he was a Skyrlist but unlike most of them, a great warrior. Maybe too great, as he tended to run off and get in trouble.
I could remember more of his life as I looked. Marla. She was our cleric. Too vain about her beard, but kind and gentle and hardworking. I'd been saved by her many times.
"They are all inside you; when you return, you will remember their wisdom. Instead of the tight focus of my children, you will have a great deal of flexibility," Celestia said. "As Ivan has begun to master shadows, with time, you will master this ability as you continue your path to Immortality with the others."
That could be really useful. "And if I die?"
"Success or failure in the quest is not measured by death but rather whether you master the virtues of your sphere and succeed, in the end, in the tasks assigned. For people at the level you operate at, the real challenge becomes moral. Not 'can I succeed' so much as 'what are the consequences of my actions'," she said. "The Council of Intrusions... they're not happy you died, but they are happy with you for your willingness to die for our world. Thus, they have approved you for the path of Immortality in the Sphere of Matter. There will be more for you to do under Luna's and my guidance, but you will find us more helpful mentors than Bastet." She said the last word with sadness after previous joy. She sighed. "She has been punished by being assigned to spend a lifetime without her powers as a mortal to remind her that mortals are not toys."
"And Marquetta?" I said. I don't know what to think about her. She wants me dead, but she fought hard for our world and cooperated fully with us in the fight. But if she's going to go back to causing us trouble...
"Considers your death protecting her people to be a quitclaim between you," Celestia said. "And has been informed she is not allowed to claim your sword. Hopefully, we won't have more trouble with her for a while. And she's matured a little."
"I would think you would want someone a lot more mature before making them an immortal," I said, frowning as I studied the picture of Dmitri's death we were now studying.
"I would not want to be the Great One," Celestia said, shaking her head. "Chosing a Moon Dragon is difficult because Colored Dragons are difficult. But she will cause us no more trouble at least for now."
"So what is my next task?"
"You all will be given a rest, but part of your task will be learning to be comfortable as both Pony and Human. For Immortals are not Human or Pony or Dwarf or Troll. Even the draconic immortals must come to transcend the speciation of dragons. This is especially important for Polymaths, for the sphere of Matter is also the sphere of all living things," Celestia said.
We stood before Odo now; he was climbing the rigging of a ship and smiling. I envied him; he was so full of joy. He didn't know how hard life could be.
"It's not easy," I said softly.
"I know," she said. "Luna and I still tend to think of ourselves as Ponies. They are special to us. But an Immortal must cultivate a broader perspective. It is one of several difficult balancing acts. But the others will help you. And one day, you will help them, for they will have to learn that lesson as well." She stretched, adjusted her vest, and smiled. "This is how I am known on the Savage Coast to the west." She had repeating crossbows on her hips, I noticed. Those miniature ones they use, often with trick ammo.
It won't be easy, but I will do it. "So what all DOES my sword do?" I asked her.
"We can discuss it later. Luna has a report for you. But we must meet Twilight and Fluttershy and meet with the Council of Intrusion and get you back before Rarity has a heart attack."
I nodded. "Where is everyone else?"
"Fretting over your body until your soul comes back to it. Luna has restored your flesh but right now, your soul is here with me. So we must make this quick so you can return and relieve their worries," Celestia said.
I do not want Rarity to worry even MORE, so I agree. Let's get this show moving.
**************
We found Twilight in Celestia's library. She looked... almost stoned, trying to read four books at once. "This is amazing! I thought every copy of the Amadil Engravings had been destroyed during the Boldavian Vespers!" she said frantically.
"I'm sorry, dear, but we have to go," Celestia said.
Something now sunk in. Twilight was substantially taller or I had shrunk. A quick check showed me that I seemed to be the same height and was still human.
"Hello, Twilight, I see you've grown," I said softly.
She ran over and pounced on me and without Celestia I would have fallen down. "Marcus!"
"I'm okay," I told her. "We have to make this quick; Rarity must be very worried." I wondered why Celestia hadn't brought her.
"Mother Nature wants to see Fluttershy and the council wanted to see Twilight," Celestia said to me.
Twilight said, "Should I take on a human form?"
"It's up to you," Celestia said. "As I told Marcus, part of Immortality is that you have to abandon being attached too much to any one kind of body. As our concerns are more than just any one species, dear as my ponies are to me." I suspect she's still struggling with that herself.
"Which is why you need us," Twilight said softly as we now walked along.
"Yes," Celestia said. She took us through a door and into a garden where we found Fluttershy feeding the birds. She had grown larger too and wore her druid robes. I got a gentle hug from her.
"Has everyone grown?" I asked.
"All six of us," Fluttershy said. "I am so sorry I couldn't protect you," she said, sounding guilty.
"It's okay," I told her. "I chose that risk so I could help you protect the others." It was only then that I realized I felt this strange relief. Peace, even. I wasn't afraid here.
I knew in my gut I was safe.
"The council is Nyx for Entropy, Ixion for Energy, Noumena for Thought, Father Time for Time and Mother Nature for Matter, correct?" Twilight said.
"Ixion and Nyx in the same group?" I said, stunned. She seems to alternate between trying to destroy the sun so her undead can flourish and trying to seduce him, from what I have heard.
"They can be professional and Nyx is still easier to deal with than many Entropics," Celestia said.
Ahahaha.
************
Father Time was a grey haired old human sitting on a throne, wearing blue robes with a golden hourglass woven into them. He looked very serious.
Four other thrones were here this time. A dusky-skinned man with red hair, clad in golden armor, sat to the left of Father Time. Ixion, I suspect. He had a flaming sword propped against his throne, burning merrily. Left of him was a brown haired man, short and brown skinned, mostly naked except for a fancy Nithian hat and a skirt and sandals. His eyes seemed unfocused as if he was paying attention to some distant vista. He must be Noumena, of whom I know little.
To the right of Father Time was his wife, Mother Nature, Djaea, black haired and brown skinned, with bright brown eyes; she was the darkest skinned of all those present. Laurel crowned her head. And to her right sat Nyx, a pale skinned, raven haired immortal, clad in a slinky black dress. She was smiling, showing her fangs.
A sixth immortal stood, but not in a throne. She was curled up off to the left of Noumena, a huge red dragon with eyes that resembled the moon. The Moon Dragon, Pearl, who I have known as Marquetta and Marjorie.
"Was this the meeting that had you confused about why I wasn't dead?" I asked him.
"It is complicated," he said. "Time is a very complex thing."
"Indeed," Noumena said.
"I was not yet aware of the full extent of what had happened with you," Father Time said. "And your time thread was ambiguous."
Fluttershy kneeled, pony-style, before Mother Nature.
"Rise, daughter," Mother Nature said. "You have pleased me greatly." She rose, walked over, and placed her hands on Fluttershy's head. "You followed my teachings well and at great risk to yourself." She touched Fluttershy's golden torc; it rippled and turned to platinum. Then she tucked a bag into Fluttershy's saddlebags. "You can give this to Applejack, who served us well as well."
"Thank you, Mother Nature," Fluttershy said humbly. I noticed she remained kneeling.
"Rise," Mother Nature said and she became a pony scaled to Fluttershy's size, chestnut coated and green maned.
Fluttershy looked her in the eye, then turned her head away.
Gently, Mother Nature guided it back and then looked her in the eye and smiled. "Be proud. I am proud of you."
Fluttershy turned red and then Mother Nature returned to her throne, turning back to human form.
Ixion raised his hand. "Let this meeting of the Council of Intrusion begin." He frowned. "Pearl, why did you not report this breach?"
"As I told you, there was no time. And originally, I thought it could be handled without any need to disturb the council. It is my duty as an Immortal to guard the walls of this world, is it not?" Pearl said sulkily, like a child who has been sent to her corner.
"Ixion, dear," Nyx said, fluttering her eyelids at Ixion, "She did her duty to the world, and even forsook a blood feud to do so." Is she flirting with him?
I decided to try to not notice.
"So what is the problem?" Nyx asked.
"The problem is that, with no experience in such things, she tried to handle it in a mortal identity without reporting to us. We have procedures for a reason," Ixion said.
Ixion is a god of law. Classic example.
"Well, we did it too," Fluttershy said, surprising me. "She just wanted to protect our world and so did we. So if you're going to punish her, you ought to punish us too."
DO NOT VOLUNTEER ME FOR SHARING PUNISHMENT WITH THE DRAGON WHICH WANTED TO KILL ME.
Ixion and Pearl seemed equally flummoxed by this.
"Truly the Element of Kindness," Nyx said. "I incline towards clemency, since she is inexperienced in such affairs. And she did her duty as an Immortal in the face of temptation to do otherwise."
Ixion frowned at her as well.
"She is new to her duties," Noumena said. "I see no need to punish her for success. If she had not reported in, we would not have even known this happened. Best not to discourage honesty."
"She wanted to go, but we all would have died by the time she came back," Twilight said. "Her staying kept us all alive."
That's ponies in a nutshell.
Too kind to enemies for their own good.
"We agree," Father Time said. "There is no need for any punishment. She did well in defense of the world and most Immortals would not have bothered to come running to us unless they thought they could not handle it or did not wish to. I think we can move on, since these mortals need to return to their flesh soon."
Ixion grimaced, then nodded. "Let it be recorded," he said and I felt a burst of magic. "Samus Marcus, the Council of Candidacy has ruled that you may continue your path to Immortality under the sponsorship of Celestia and Luna. I believe Celestia has briefed you on this?"
"Yes," I said, bowing.
"Very well. Good luck. Keep your nose clean and your past transgressions will be forgotten," Ixion said sternly. "And clean up your messes."
"Yes, sir," I said. Never argue with this type of person; look good and compliant and they will be more merciful.
He looked pleased. "Twilight, candidate for Immortality under Celestia and Luna as well. You have done well so far."
She cast a spell, became human and curtseyed. She was, however, still naked.
Ixion's eyes widened, Nyx laughed, Noumena closed his eyes, Father Time blinked, and Mother Nature smiled broadly.
Then she looked at herself. "Oh dear." She cast another spell. Sweatervest. And another gave her a skirt. "My apologies."
"Ixion may have to blind himself now for thinking dirty thoughts," Nyx said, laughing.
"I have seen women naked before," he grumbled.
"Is that a come-on?" Nyx asked, leaning forwards, which rather showed off her chest.
"Enough," Ixion said, making an odd hand gesture at Nyx. "Apology accepted. Twilight, please give our thanks to the bearers of the Elements of Harmony."
"Thank you," she said, and bowed.
"I advise you to consult with Marcus to avoid further breaches of etiquette like that, however," Ixion continued.
Noumena studied Twilight in a manner which made me a little nervous. Not a sexual or a hostile look, but something... She had his attention and I got the impression mortals rarely did.
Then again, he is of the sphere of Thought.
We now had a bit of a formal ceremony of thanks, and then they let us go. Celestia took us back to her castle and then, bamf, we woke up back in the Moonraker.
**************
Rarity's Point of View:
Lunette sat on the bed, holding one of Marcus' hands; I was in human form, holding the other one. She was keeping him alive until his soul returned. I was holding on so I would not completely freak out; Sweetie was asleep next to him, Twilight on the other side of the bed and Fluttershy on the floor. The others were in the next room, playing cards and waiting.
Fluttershy stirred first, then Twilight, then Marcus, just as I was ready to die. He pulled me down and kissed me softly, holding me close.
I embraced him and felt my worries fade away. I'd been terrified that I'd lost him, that after everything, he was dead and gone forever.
I started crying as we kissed as everything I'd held tight until I was sure, absolutely sure, now burst forth. The others cleared out and left us alone; they had to pry Sweetie off him, mind you.
"Never do that again," I said urgently. "You have nothing to prove to me."
"It wasn't about proving, it was about me trying to help ensure everyone else got out okay," he said, holding me tightly. His voice was urgent. "Tell me you're okay."
"I'm wonderful," I told him. "We all got taller."
"I know," he said, kissing me one more time.
I feel very strange. It's a good strange, though. "Father wants to see you but it can wait."
He made a gurgly noise and I smiled. "Scarier than Devil Masters?" I teased him.
"Much," he mumbled, but then he leaned on me. "I love you," he said. "Whatever may come."
"I love you too," I told him and kissed him one more time.
We snuggled for a while and I began trying to decide if I should broach more intimate matters.
"I'm sorry about your dress," he said to me.
"I will make ten better ones," I told him. "If you cling to anything and try to hold it back for yourself forever, it will come to lose its glitter in time anyway. But now we will both remember it and what it stood for even more vividly."
He touched his hat, the one I made him, and then he touched mine. "You are the best of all women," he said. He gave a happy sigh. "I feel so good. Which probably means the Moonraker will now explode."
I laughed. "I think we'll have a peaceful trip back." But if it explodes, I don't mind so long as my shop doesn't explode. My poor customers are probably losing their minds by now, with me gone. I will have SO much work.
But that's okay. I like to work hard and to create under pressure.
And I can use Marcus as my model for a men's fashion line. I need to improve my skills there, anyway.
I was half snuggling and kissing and half musing on how Marcus and I would grow my fashion empire when Pinkie shouted through the door, "There's a cake waiting and it may well vanish forever if you don't come join us!"
"Coming," I said. I kissed him one more time. "Come on, my love."
We went out to join the others.
*****************
Spike's Point of View:
I could smell that bastard Marcus was coming. My fists clenched and I scarfed down three donuts at once in my frustration, then nearly choked.
Then I nearly fell down when Marjorie whacked my back gently with a hoof. I coughed up the stuck bits of donut. "Thanks," I said to her. So she's a dragon. But I guess her dragon body wouldn't fit here. We were on the Moonraker in what Pinkie had turned into a party room. All the traps were, in theory, turned off.
"It's hard to let go," she said softly to me.
I'm kind of stunned we're here, not killing each other. But all's well that ends well, right? "Yeah, I know," I told her.
"Dragons do not forgive easily, not even the lawful ones. Maybe even more so," she said. "Because some chaotic dragons will just get bored with revenge and never finish. Or get distracted."
"I want to kick his ass, but he's too tough for me," I told her, feeling frustrated. "I just know he's going to screw things up like he did with Twilight."
"I am the worst possible person to tell you this," Marjorie said hesitantly. "But you need to let it go. I don't like him either. Letting go of this feud doesn't come easily to me. Letting go of anything doesn't. It's not my nature," Marjorie said.
"Donut?" I said to her, holding one out to her.
She ate it quickly. "Thank you, young one," Marjorie continued. "But I am not a dragon any more. Not only a dragon, anyway." She sounded somewhat lost.
I don't know what I'd do if I stopped being a dragon. "What are you?"
"Immortal," she said softly. "As your master will be one day."
"She's not my master, she's..." I struggled to explain it. "She's Twilight. We work together. Sometimes she helps ME," I said. I don't know how to define it, exactly. She depends on me and I want her to. I love her. Not like I love Rarity but... maybe more like a cool big sister.
Yeah, like that.
"The bond of parent and child, sibling and sibling, is weak among our kind. We are so strong, we have little need for others," Marjorie said.
Which is why you made your own set of minions. I smell denial.
"I'm a lot more sociable than other dragons," I told her. "Sometimes I wonder if Twilight got a little pony in me."
"You are something new, Spike," Marjorie said.
My eyes widened.
"I will be curious to see how you develop," Marjorie continued.
I could see Rarity talking to everyone now, that damn punk Marcus by her side, being all, la la...
Marjorie patted my shoulder awkwardly. "It's okay. You are very young and will likely find many more... potential mates in the future. It's going to be okay." Her voice wobbled oddly; she clearly didn't know the right tone to strike.
But she was trying. Was it the instincts of her body? Because we're both dragons? "I hate him so much."
"So do I, but sometimes you have to let go of hate. Do you know how much time I spent contemplating his doom? Do you know how much he even remembered me?" She sounded very disappointed. "I was Tuesday to him. Just another encounter, just another death. He didn't hate me. He didn't even REMEMBER me."
I had not the slightest clue how you even reply to that, so I passed her a donut and ate one myself.
"Anyway, we have to forget them," Marquetta said to me.
Some part of my brain was screaming 'RUN AWAY', but I ignored it, not being a coward like Marcus. Bastard.
"Don't try anything," Sweetie said sternly and I jumped.
"Hello, young one," Marjorie said. "Are you enjoying the party?" she said after a pause, as if consulting a book of phrases in her head.
I glanced around but no sign of Dawn Gleaming feeding her lines from a book of etiquette.
"Very much, Princess," Sweetie said, curtseying to her as best a pony can (which is to say, it looked rather odd). "Spike, you have to let go. Marcus and Rarity are going to be together FOREVER." She had the emphasis on this that only a naive little filly can have.
I'm old enough to know better. Or maybe I've just read too much to not know better.
Though I kind of hoped Rarity and I would beat the odds.
"He's... I can't trust him," I told her. I wish I could. I remember the old days, when we were good buddies. I thought he and Twilight... that we...
Dammit, I got my drink on my eyes somehow or something.
Sweetie Belle suddenly looked mortified, while Marjorie studied me in confusion. I looked at myself. Okay, I do have a few crumbs but I look basically normal. Why is Marjorie confused?
Human-Rarity is so beautiful... It's weird. I can see the beauty in her both ways. "Do you think she's beautiful, Marjorie?" I asked her.
"Sweetie seems too young for mating but when she's a little older, she would likely be a good choice if you want a Pony," Marjorie said very hesitantly. "Her coat is clean and her mane well cared for, with no flaws in her teeth, hooves, or eyes. She possesses a strong Cutie Mark and is likely to be as or more potent than her sister some day. I don't know her ancestral tree well enough to study that, though," she continued.
"..." I stared at Marjorie in shock.
Sweetie stared, jaws wide open.
You know, she does have really clean, well-shaped teeth.
"I meant RARITY," I said urgently.
Rarity's head turned and now she began coming my way.
I panicked and ran, and she began chasing me, then Sweetie ran after me and then ALL HER FRIENDS joined the chase, laughing and shouting and now Ditzy chased after them. "Come back, fillies! This is an INDOOR party!"
I glanced back; EVERYONE was gaining on me. Dammit, why do Ponies have to be so fast? And humans so long-legged?
I thought about Rarity's legs and got my happy feeling, which stopped me long enough for everyone to crash into me and each other.
When the dust cleared, Ditzy herded the kids away and Rarity took me into a side room.
Then we nearly fell in a pit trap and she had to disarm swinging blades.
This place is DANGEROUS.
After that, we sat at a table. "Spike, I've avoided saying anything about this because I didn't want to hurt your feelings," Rarity said, looking nervous.
"Who told you? It was supposed to be a secret," I said urgently.
"Telling secrets is BAD," Pinkie said, stepping out of the closet.
"Pinkie, go," Rarity said firmly.
"Who blabbed?" Pinkie said urgently.
"I am not blind," Rarity said, slumping a little. "I just did not want to hurt Spike and I did not know how to handle it." She sighed.
"Okay," Pinkie said, then hugged me. "We all love you, you know," Pinkie said to me.
"Me too," I mumbled, embarrassed.
She let go and left.
"I don't know what to say," I said to Rarity's hands as they rested on the table.
"Neither do I," she said, sounding sad, which made my heart ache. "I like you, Spike. You're a dear friend and I would gladly fight to protect you. But I do not love you. And I'm sorry. I should have said something long ago, but I kept hoping you would give up and spare me having to do this."
"I forgive you," I said. How can I not? I love her.
"Spike, you shouldn't forgive me so easily," she told me. "I have taken advantage of your good nature too many times." She fingered her necklace. "It was unworthy of my role as the Element of Generosity. I would like to make it up to you. Within the limits of us being friends."
"He's going to hurt you," I said bitterly to her hands. I glanced at her and she looked so sad and guilty and now I felt horrible.
"This isn't about Marcus," she said. "It's about us. I suspected you had a crush on me and I did nothing about it. I liked it, even though I wasn't interested." She sounded very guilty now. "I can be vain if I am not careful."
"Only because you are so beautiful and kind and generous," I told her. "Sharing your beauty with us." For a moment, the pain faded.
She smiled, then made herself stop. "You are the generous one. You always helped me. Let me help you. I want to do something special for you as an apology."
"I want a moustache," I said, then forever regretted it.
"I am not sure if your kind of dragon can grow one except for a temporary magical one," she said. "Though Steven had a truly magnificent one." She tapped her cheek thoughtfully. "I will see what I can do for you there. But I should do more than that."
I can't decide if having her make me a suit would be the BEST or the WORST thing ever. Or both at once.
"Sweetie, stop spying on us and go play with your friends," Rarity suddenly said loudly, sounding irritated.
"I'm not spying!" Sweetie said in the hallway.
Now I REALLY wanted to die.
"Go back to the party!" Rarity said sharply. "This is between Spike and I."
Sweetie ran off. Stupid filly. Thinks she's so big. Worships stupid Marcus and the ground he walks on. Blah, blah, look what Marcus taught me, blah. He's probably going to make her into glue.
I suddenly realized I was curled up, somehow wetting my leg with my face, while Rarity patted my shoulder. I wanted to hug her but knew I couldn't.
DAMMIT.
"I'll think about it," I told her. "I have to go check my pet rock."
I ran and ran and then I ended up trapped inside a spinning crystal sphere somehow.
Twilight found me, got me out and took us back to her room, then held me while I shook and tried to pull myself together. "I know how you feel," she said softly.
"You should hate him," I said urgently. "What he did to you was WRONG. You cried so much and I just... I HATE HIM!" I shouted.
Her legs were so gentle around me, her body so warm. She looked very sad. "It will pass," she told me. "I know it feels like the end of the world, but it will pass. And one day, you and Rarity will be friends again without anything bad between you. And all you will remember is the good bits of this and not the bad." She kissed my forehead. "I'm here for you, Spike. I love you very much."
"Me too," I mumbled. "Do you think we can trust Marjorie? I want... She is a dragon but lots of dragons aren't very nice."
"We'll have to see," Twilight said to me. "She was quite worried about you, and confused. She's not very socially adept."
I was laughing and sad at the same time. "Hello, Mrs. Pot."
"Hey, I am the element of FRIENDSHIP," Twilight said defensively. "My studies of it are coming along VERY well."
Her 'studies'. I felt a little better. She's so cute when she tries to feign being as socially smooth as I am.
And I'm a *dragon*.
"Ready to face the party?"
"No, but now I'm hungry and thirsty," I said.
"No more donuts or you won't sleep before we reach Sind," Twilight said firmly to me.
"I'll have cake."
"No more sugar."
I got up. "You have to stop me."
"SPIKE!"
She chased me all the way to the party; I felt a little better by the time I got there.
Just a little.
******************
Dash-Vision, 20% Cooler Than Yours:
It's strange. Looking at Marjorie and her flunkies, I can see their bond to her and hers to them. Our bonds to each other, the Cutie Mark Crusader's bonds to each other. When Marcus and Rarity came out, I could just look at him and see his firm loyalty to all of us.
And how much he believes in me, which is a little embarrassing. But then, I think he still kind of has a thing for me, even if he is pretty firmly loyal to Rarity. Which is only logical; if you're going to be into mares, I am pretty cool.
He looks like he's shrunk but I know he hasn't. We're all bigger. I am fourteen hands high now!
Oooh...
After Rarity took off running after Spike, I sidled over to Marcus. "Come on, we have to make you scream now."
Marcus stared, mouth open wide.
"Flying," I said, grinning. "I have a boyfriend, you know."
"Sure," he said. "I guess you don't need the spell any more."
"Hah! I bet I'd be as big as Celestia with that spell," I told him. I feel so strong. I'm even taller than Big Macintosh!
Pretty soon, we headed down to a hanger. I put on my magic goggles and we took off.
I think I am faster but it's hard to tell. I feel so vigorous. Like I could fly forever.
He wasn't shaking.
Much.
Just a little, but given he can't fly, that's reasonable, though of course, I'd never let him fall. The one bad thing is that we're flying over the clouds, so it's kind of cold (for him) and you can't see the landscape. I think we're over Darokin; we're on the way back to return the Radhirajah.
I zoomed upwards, then plummeted.
Now he screamed. It was oddly reassuring.
"So what's it like, coming back from the dead?" I asked him.
"You get used to it," he said. "Celestia has a nice palace on her home plane."
"Man, when I am an Immortal, I am going to build a cloud the size of a continent. It'll be nothing but sky forever and cloud islands," I told him. "I guess I'll need a few solid bits for visitors, though." Do all immortals fly? I guess they shapeshift into something that can fly.
"Better make an alarm so you don't nap away a few centuries," Marcus said and I laughed.
He laughed too, and he sounded so happy. He's usually kind of melancholy; it takes someone happy like me to buck some cheer into him.
"I wish I could see the land," I said.
"Nothing stopping us dropping down. I doubt it'll compromise the mission," Marcus said.
So I plummeted through the clouds and now I could see the landscape spread out before us, the great lake in western Darokin with a fancy name... called... something...
"Lake Amsorak," Marcus said. He began humming a tune; I dimly remembered singing it with everyone when we ballooned back to Ponyville after White Plume Mountain. I began humming it as well.
Ships were crossing the waters, some of them strung out along a long line of navigation, others scattered about, fishing. White and blue and yellow sails caught the wind, pulling the ships to the great cities on the eastern and western shores, far below us.
I dove lower and I could see the crews hard at work, hauling goods. I could tell who they owed allegiance to at a glance, even if I don't know much about Umbarth House or Toney House or Franich House or Corun House. I could see their rivalries and enmities and the bonds built by shared labor.
We learned about some of this in school but I forgot it all. It was all lines on paper and the teacher droning on about how they skillfully tan monster hides in Corunglain and ship it to the Ethengars, who steal porcelain from the Heldaan Freeholds and trade it for the hides.
But there weren't any people in it.
But now I can see the old man piloting that ship. He's done it for decades, and he would die to save his ship, for it has saved him many times. He's been hauling spices from Sind to Akorros since before my parents were born. And he plans to do it until he dies. It's what he loves, the feeling of the wheel in his hands and the water below his ship.
He serves Franich House and has grown a strong loyalty to it, and it's loyal to him for he has served it well. Franich House is made of people.
I guess that sounds kind of silly, but I can see that now.
I can sense, dimly, the huge web of loyalties which holds Darokin together, feel threads extending into other countries too, a giant web of interconnections.
It was a little overwhelming but somehow reassuring. All of them were part of something larger, and yet they were themselves.
I flew down low and buzzed the ships; some of them waved, others shook fists and some just stared. Marcus waved, clearly enjoying the attention, even the insults.
"Feels good doesn't it?" I asked him.
"It feels wonderful," he said, smiling.
A letter landed on us. 'Scootaloo tried to follow you but I think she's lost. Can you find her? Twilight'.
That kid is going to be the death of me. But I know how she feels. I smiled a little. Kid's got a very bright future ahead of her.
If she doesn't get killed for being so rash.
Stop laughing, Marcus!
**************
Rarity's Tale:
I leaned on Father, embracing him around the neck. He looked slightly confused and I held him quietly. Poor Spike. He's a good guy, and he's been a great help to him but I've taken advantage of him too many times. He needs to move on and find someone his own age, like maybe Sweetie or Apple Bloom. Or Twist, who is a very sweet girl and needs someone bold and out-going like Spike.
Seeing Clarity and Spikey being all snuggly certainly can't help his state of mind. I could sense how much they share with each other; I can feel people's generosity or lack thereof. It started after I sewed the world back together, I think.
Clarity came over now and shyly nuzzled Father, who nuzzled her back. "We should send Mother a letter," she said to Father. Then she glanced at me.
I said nothing and just held onto Father. I could smell him at least a little like this and it comforted me. Father is always a pillar of strength.
"Yes. She'll be happy to have another daughter," he said warmly and she smiled brighter now. "Even if it's complicated to explain."
"So will you all be going back to Marjorie's base after this party?" I asked.
"Yes, though I plan to come down to Canterlot and see Mother soon," Clarity said. "We have a large mess to clean up and it's best we don't go back to Sind." She looked rather embarrassed.
What on Earth are we going to tell them? I know Luna told the Radhirajah some sort of story of what happened, but I'm not sure what it is.
And we need to contact the ambassador and make sure war hasn't already begun or civil war.
Fortunately, I am rather silver tongued. I should sit down with Twilight and do some cramming. She's a good leader, but she doesn't have my skills in this area. I really should have taken the lead more on it during our first visit but I was too busy being frustrated with father and snuggly with Marcus. I love him but I need to do my duty too.
We talked quietly for a while, until Marcus returned with Dash and Scootaloo. Ditzy now gave Scootaloo a lecture, while Dash and Marcus strode over. All the Elements of Harmony are taller now in pony form. My human form's taller too but it's not as noticable. "One boyfriend returned with virtue intact," Dash said cheerfully.
Clarity blinked and Spikey laughed loudly. Father snorted.
Ah, yes, this. I could feel his lack of generosity towards Marcus and it greatly annoyed me.
"Father, don't even say it," I told him. "Marcus is my boyfriend and I love him. So you can accept him or go crazy."
Marcus looked, understandably, tense.
Father sighed. "I do not like you but I am a wise enough man not to hit my head against a wall forever. If you hurt her, I will make you regret your own birth." I could feel how tense he was. "But you fought well and bravely. You can... have some cake," he trailed off lamely.
Dash laughed at that. "Oh, he'd do that anyway. Come on! CAKE TIME."
And with that, she dragged us away.
**************
Pinkie's Pie-Laden Point of View:
We just about squished Pinkamena in a big family hug before she had to go. It's one of the things families are for. I was very sad to see them go but I'm sure I'll see them again soon.
"Know that I'll always love you," I told her firmly.
"Nothing is eternal, you know that," she told me softly. She looked sad. But I could tell a spark of joy had been lit in her heart by this. And I was sure she'd fan it into a bright flame with time.
I've always been able to see joy a little but I can see it brighter now; the happiness around me makes me feel so good.
Except for the Radhirajah, who I guess is a gloomy gus by nature, though ADMITTEDLY, being kidnapped is one of the better reasons to be sad.
I suppose he's not looking forward to catching up on work. I expect the grease trap has started hunting live prey by now without me to clean it. I'd better see if Twilight has any good mystic cleansers.
"What was that about grease?" Mother asked.
"I will likely have to clean the grease trap when we finally get back to Ponyville," I said. "If I die there, you can give my astral sugar to Pinkamena, Inky, and Blinky," I told her. "Oh man, I bet I could make demon and devil-smacking pies with it!"
"Here, come with me, I'll show you how," Mother said. This is how I ended up in the galley during a PARTY, cleaning grease traps.
But Mother was enjoying it so much, I couldn't say no. We scrubbed them together. It's been a very long time since we last did chores together.
Mother gave a happy sigh when we finished. "Nice and sparkly clean," she said. It gleamed like fine bronze now.
I hope it's supposed to be bronze colored.
Mother likes everything neat and tidy and just so.
"Remember, always clean the kitchen after you cook," she said sternly.
"Yes, mother," I said. It's so easy to slide into old habits; they're comfy like well worn boots.
"My little Pinky, out saving the world," she said softly.
"When I become Immortal, I can take Kagyar a message for you if you want," I told her.
Her eyes widened. "You shouldn't joke about such things."
"I'm not," I told her. "It won't be easy but I am going to do it. For Pinkamena and our friends and all the people of this world who need some joy. For everyone who lives in darkness and doesn't even know light exists. I've seen what happens in a world where joy is dead." I shuddered at the memory. "One day, even the devils will laugh." I squatted on my hindquarters and put a hoof to my heart. "Whatever it takes, wherever I must go, even if it involves... math..." Just saying 'math' is like dunking my head in acid. Not the tasty kind. "I will do. One day, I will make them all laugh at me and I will laugh too and then we'll probably all ascend to whatever the next rung of the ladder is."
"Do you remember the Book of Embers?," Mother said softly. It's the final book of the holy texts of Kagyar. It's a prophecy of the end times.
"Orcus laughs but only at pain," I said, frowning. He's Kagyar's greatest enemy, Orcus the destroyer, who tears down all things and ensures nothing endures. All the works of our hands, he reduces to ashes and then he laughs, cold, mocking laughter at the idea of permanence or eternity.
He's mean.
"'Then sounds the final trump, when naught is left but Embers, and a hand comes down and lifts it all up,'" she quoted. "'For then return the great makers, to make the world anew, stronger and better. Pray you will join them on that day, when Immortal and mortal alike come before them for judgement. Then shall be judged how well you crafted and to what end. Then shall be made something higher and better. Something so beautiful we cannot even imagine it yet. A new day is coming, for every end is a new beginning. Be ready.'"
"No one really understands what that means," I told her. "All our preachers always skipped over it."
"Long ago, your father and I stumbled on something in a dungeon. Five Immortals worshipping something higher still. Maybe it keeps going up," Mother said hesitantly, strangely afraid. "Or there is a peak, beyond our ken. But I suppose it doesn't matter for us here and now."
I guess I am going to find out. I'd like to hope there's always something new to find, new to explore, new goals to follow. I like new things. "We need to go while cookies remain," I told her. "Thank you, Mother."
She nuzzled me gently. "I love you. I am proud of you. Please be careful."
"Says the great SECRET heroine," I told her. "So tell me about your adventures."
That kept us busy as we went back to the party AND made her happy.
Double score!
**************
Sweetie Belle's Lemon Scented Viewpoint:
As the ship headed for Sind to take the Radish-Rajah home, the five of us slipped off for a meeting before bedtime. "Well, we've come to the end of our first crusade," I said. "Everyone has their cutie marks now."
"FINALLY," Scootaloo said, sighing happily.
"But it's pretty clear this isn't the end for our club," Apple Bloom said, swishing her tail around, idly picking things up with it. "We never did get to go to the South Pole, for one thing."
"Or the north," Dinky pointed out. "Also, there's an OARD to be rooted out of Ponyville!"
If they're real, though it seems like they are.
"That should be our first order of business," Twist said. "Maybe I can make a candy to reveal them."
We began excitedly discussing plans for how to catch the evil time traveller.
TIME MONSTER BUSTING CRUSADERS GO!
Our first adventure is over, but our quests are just beginning. There's so many places to go and so many things to do. And I can do anywhere and do anything with my friends at my side.
Because this is where I belong. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Book 7: Epilogue | My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Epilogues: Say Goodnight, Sammy
By John Biles
***************
Rarity's Tale:
We brought the Radhirajah home and he cleared us before his council; he doesn't want war with Equestria any more than we do. That being said, I could tell some of them weren't very happy and I can't blame them for that either. I was able to help smooth things over, appearing before them in human form. You use the tools you have, though having to cater to their ludicrous beliefs annoyed me.
But as they say, 'sometimes you must stoop to conquer'. There will be no war and our nations will live in peace. But I am never going back if I can help it.
We returned to Canterlot and everyone stared at us when the ship landed and we all got down into the palace. I'd gone back to Pony form, so I didn't understand why at first.
Then all the guards and assembled courtiers bowed to us. I thought at first it was just Princess Luna (also back in Pony form) but soon it became apparent everyone was bowing.
That made me uncomfortable but it made Applejack even more so.
Scootaloo, on the other hand, began strutting around like she owned the place.
"Rise, my little ponies," Luna said. Then she gave a speech praising us all.
I studied the fillies; even they're a little bigger, it seems, though they didn't grow as much as us. Are we going to become like Luna and Celestia? I talked to Twilight about this some, but she didn't know everything.
There is a part of me which delights in the idea of Immortality. What could be more beautiful and special than that? To have forever to create beautiful things for others?
But I've also seen now how it sets you apart. It means leaving behind so many I know, living forever means losing people forever too. I will have my friends by my side, but...
I ought to enjoy the way they're all gazing at me but I'm nervous instead. Marcus... it can be hard to read him. He had his hand firmly on my back; it's his way of showing affection when I'm a pony. It's reassuring. Either he accepts this or maybe he doesn't realize it's unusual.
Can I be a Celestia? A Luna? In my vainer moments, I am sure, but the rest of the time, I am not so sure.
I suddenly realized nothing I have will fit any more. I have to redo all of my outfits. If I didn't have such a hideous backlog to catch up on, that would actually be quite fun but so many people are going to need me.
I like to be needed. But this may be a little too much need, though I will have Marcus and Sweetie to help me.
My shop... one day I will have to leave it behind. The thought bothers me. But then, if you cling to something too hard...
But I am not quite ready for that. I just want some normal life for a while with the man I love and the work I love. I get to have both. For a while, I thought maybe I would never know true love. That my dreams had been empty. Oh, I've been in love before and I'm not a child who thinks love is always forever, then is crushed when it is not. But being rejected like that, by what I thought was the man of my dreams... I had never had a man turn me down.
I really was vain.
But for a while, I get to be just Rarity Belle, the greatest fashion designer and seamstress in Equestria, rather than Rarity, the Element of Generosity. And I am ready for that.
I enjoy my adventures, but now I need some home time. No crises... okay, no body-endangering crises. The professional life never runs flawlessly smoothly.
But life needs a little spice to keep it interesting. And I love a good challenge.
Mother rushed up now to greet Father and Sweetie and I and we all nuzzled each other happily.
I am the luckiest Pony in the world. Whatever the future may bring, which I suspect will include the first fashion shop in Pandius (the city of the Immortals), I am ready for it.
SOMEONE has to get Ixion to finally wear something that doesn't look wretched and I am just the Pony to do it.
And Father Time... do not EVEN GET ME STARTED.
It's pretty clear that Immortal haute couture is... lacking.
I have to wonder if Scootaloo time travelled into the past and designed their traditional outfits.
And Ka... you can tell he preceded tool use, let alone clothing. And...
Well, I could rant about that all night, but there is far too much else to do.
And I am ready to do it. Ponyville needs me and I am ready to be needed.
************
Applejack's Story:
It took a great amount of effort to get Applebloom and her friends to leave the Moonraker in Canterlot for royal use as needed. But since it's actually too big and complicated for five fillies to operate by themselves, we eventually talked her into it. Luna gave them another liftwood tree and the materials to build a fancy flying clubhouse which won't possibly destroy Ponyville the next time there is a storm, which is one of my big concerns. The Moonraker is big enough to squish an entire neighborhood if it fell in a storm.
We anchored the tree on Sweet Apple Acres, so the kids can fly up on one of Dinky's bubbleclouds whenever they want to play.
I was so glad to be home. This trip has really broadened my horizons, but I needed a chance to... well, unbroaden for a while. I want to feel the dirt on my hooves and tend my garden before I start tending the world.
But I can't stay here forever, like I once thought I would. Much as I'd like to. Doing what I did with Fluttershy... it was incredible. And it felt right. I was meant for that, weird as it is to think about.
There are places where nothing lives and nothing grows. Places that need a green hoof. That need a farmer. Someone who brings life to the world. Who can shape the cold dead wilderness into a place that sustains life.
It's easier to stay home. Safer to tend your little garden and let the world turn into compost outside it. I always looked to my own and didn't worry about nothin' else. Sure, all of Ponyville was my own and I'd help everypony I could.
But the world's a lot bigger and there are other worlds as well.
And they need help too.
My roots will always be planted here, even if one day I walk among the Immortals. But a tree doesn't cling to the ground. It reaches to the sky, and the more it grows, the higher it reaches.
One day, my branches will reach the stars.
But for now, I'm going to take a while to tend my roots.
Starting with the weird smell coming from the house.
Apple Bloom made a face. "I think Granny fell asleep during cooking again."
"This isn't burning, it's... it's..." I don't know what it is but it cannot be good.
We got closer and now I heard Daisy say, "No, no, it's garlic! Not GARGOYLE."
"..." Apple Bloom and I stared at each other, and then we ran.
We found Vanilla Surprise, Daisy, Lily, and Roseluck all throwing things into a big pot of stew and arguing over what goes into it. Lily had a clear jar with rock chunks in it... which she was trying to grind and put into the stew while Daisy tried to stop her, Roseluck pretended they were both imaginary and Vanilla Surprise carefully measured some sort of white powder out of a jar.
Granny was asleep in her rocking chair, mumbling about snake-men being in the carrots again, and Big Macintosh was standing there, staring mindlessly. At times he would try to speak and they would just talk over him.
"What in tarnation is goin' on here?" I asked.
Everyone froze up except Vanilla Surprise. 'Cause Celestia is shameless when she's pretendin' she's Pinkie.
"Applejack... you're so... big...," Roseluck said, stunned.
"Bigger than me, by a touch," Big Macintosh said, staring.
"I'm bigger too! AND LOOK AT MY TAIL!" Apple Bloom said, grabbing a fork with it and waving it around.
"It's a long story," I said. "What the hay is goin' on here?"
"We're making a Boldavian stew because Big Mac was kind enough to help us out," Daisy said. "But Lily is trying to pretend she doesn't need glasses again." Lily's lying. I knew this in a moment. One of the changes.
"It says GARGOYLE," Lily insisted.
Roseluck rolled her eyes.
Apple Bloom leaped onto the counter and studied it, picking up a chunk with her tail; she brandished it and said, "This isn't gargoyle, it's GRANITE."
"I paid good money for this gargoyle!" Lily said. "It is GARGOYLE." She really thinks that. I could tell that too.
Where the hay did she try to buy chunks of gargoyle in Ponyville?
I sniffed what Vanilla Surprise was measuring. "What is this?" I asked.
"Parmesan cheese," Vanilla Surprise said, smiling cheerfully at me. I wondered again how Celestia had gotten here before us, as she'd seen us off at Canterlot. It wasn't quite powder, more like flakes I saw now.
I'm pretty sure this IS Celestia, but... can she be at two places at once?
I could use that so much.
"PARMESAN CHEESE!" Granny shouted in a panic and fled the room.
Slowly.
Big Macintosh ran over to her. "It's okay, Granny. It's just cheese."
"It is full of SCORPIONS," Granny insisted. "We only got stupid silver pieces too!"
Granny's had a few adventures but she imagines half of them these days and jumbles the rest.
"I am taking command of this cooking," Apple Bloom said, scooping up a spoon and stirring what was in the pot. "And the book says GARLIC."
Lily watched Apple Bloom's tail, hypnotised. Daisy said, "SEE?"
Roseluck said, "We need a substitute for sausage."
"Kufo," Granny said.
"What?" Roseluck said.
"Git yerself some kufo. You kin soak it in broth, and it tastes like sausage but it's good fer ponies. Least if you like beans," Granny said. "I ate a lot of it when we were dealing with them damn dragon-dogs in Oklaokra. Whatever they call that place these days, damn world changin'," she said, trailing off into grumbling.
"Ochelea?" Roseluck asked.
"Yeah, that place."
"I don't know if we can get that in Ponyville," Roseluck said.
"I can run down to the grocery and see," Big Mac said.
"Check with Twilight," I told him. "I think she got some and maybe has enough left." I paused. "Why are you all making something Boldavian, anyway?"
"Big Mac helped haul a lot of stuff for us, so we wanted to reward him," Daisy said. By reward she means, form the beast with two backs, I can tell. "Didn't I tell you that?"
"Why Boldavian?" I asked. I didn't think Big Mac had a hankerin' for foreign foods.
"I thought I should broaden my horizons and... uh, it was the first place I thought of."
"A lot of Boldavian dishes have blood, tee hee," Vanilla Surprise said, giggling. "But this one doesn't."
Ugh. Well, I hear they have a Vampire problem. But it's not mine. For now, anyway. "I'll unpack. Apple Bloom, you're in charge of herding the ladies. Big Mac, you make a run to the store. Then I'm going check on everything and say hello to my farm."
To my surprise, Big Mac took a moment to nuzzle me. "I've missed you, sister."
Granny headbutted me affectionately. "Stand still so I can nuzzle ya," she said.
I nuzzled her gently. "I love you too, Granny."
"I missed you," she said softly.
"Me too," I told her. "I'll be home a while."
"But not forever," she said softly. Then she whispered to me, "We gotta get Big Macintosh hitched before he gets too old and goes limp and can't make any foals to carry on."
Big Macintosh, who heard that, made gurgly noises, then said, "I'm off to the store!"
He ran before anyone could try to help him.
What's going to happen to Sweet Apple Acres? If Celestia's serious, he may not be able to stay and I have a feeling Apple Bloom will, at the least, roam around some before she settles down.
And I have to try and explain Apple Blossom to Granny.
What a mess.
But it's great to be home. It may be chaos incarnate some days, but I love it.
And I expect if I put the ladies to work for all the chaos they cause, we can get caught up in no time! Anyone who wants to marry Big Mac is gonna have to show they can work hard, anyway.
Unless he becomes Prince Big Mac, but I guess Princesses work hard in their own way, Immortals doubly so.
Prince Big Mac. Man, the world just keeps changing.
Well, time to get to work.
**************
Fluttershy's Viewpoint, If You Don't Mind:
I got home and hugged Angel tightly; this went well despite his efforts to escape until Slither tried to help and they began trying to beat each other up, with me in the middle. We rolled around until my new table fell on us.
"Boys, I love both of you," I said. "Can't we all get along?"
They both refused to look at each other, and I sighed, putting a leg around each of them until they relaxed.
I had to snuggle Angel for a long time until he relaxed, then we cleaned up together and they both got tired and went to bed. I need to get Slither his own bed, though.
Then I spent hours checking on my chickens (Snips had taken care of them for me and did a good job so I gave him some of my silver from the reward the Radhirajah gave us) and my other animal friends, until I'd checked in with everyone and gotten things settled. This took me until bedtime but that was okay. I got food and happily went to bed.
But then I got woken up by the sound of my chickens in terror.
There was a fox in the hen-house. He was leaping at the chickens as they ran around... umm... like chickens.
You know.
I leaped out the window. "Bad fox, bad!" I shouted at him, but he lunged at a chicken. He had her pinned when I took control of the grass and pulled him off her. He turned, studied me, then scooped up an egg with his mouth and ran off, egg in his mouth, shell unbroken.
I gave chase as he ran towards the Everfree, but he was very quick and nimble, despite being old with a silvery coat.
But I drew closer. He is nimble but I am a pony and properly motivated, I can run.
I was motivated.
He's not one of the local foxes, I knew that. He was not just poaching on my dear little chickens, he was infringing on THEIR territory. So I whistled for them and soon I had a half dozen foxes chasing him.
We surrounded him and I said, "Be a good boy and put down the egg."
Then he turned into a falcon and took off, egg still in mouth. I flew after him, turning into a hawk so I could fit through the branches of the forest as he did. Slowly, I closed on him; hunger nagged at me; I saw tasty prey but I ignored it, reminding myself that I was Fluttershy and I had to stop this poacher before he leads others to follow his example and soon everything would be chaos, like in the Malpheggi.
Not in my neighborhood.
I couldn't take care of my friends in that kind of chaos and it is so noisy.
The bird dove down to a hillside, then turned into a snake and slithered into a tunnel with the egg in his mouth.
This is a very... wait a second, how does this fox shapeshift?
I turned into a badger and began digging down after him, trying to fight the urge to go look for food. I can't be hungry now, I have to stop this poacher!
The ground crumbled and I fell into an underground stream; it was pitch black but a little prayer let me see in the darkness and I continued to give chase.
I couldn't even remember why it was so important at this point. Just that I HAD to catch him.
Before he did anything else bad to my animal friends! I had to protect them!
If he'd asked nicely, I would have let him have an egg. It's the thieving I can't tolerate.
BAD FOX.
Maybe he's one of those Ochelean foxes who I hear shapeshift. But I think they have multiple tails.
He was a crocodile now, following the current, so I became a constrictor and wrapped around his tail, letting my instincts guide me while I rode above, setting my body's goals. I would have lost myself but I was determined to teach this naughty boy a lesson in not stealing.
And not scaring my poor chickens.
I hope they're okay.
For a moment, he tried to twist around but then gave up and became a snake and we wrapped around each other, wrestling in the dark. I started to panic, he was crushing me and he was strong.
But then I thought about my poor chickens and I could not give up.
I squeezed back and then I realized... I was bigger than him. So I eased off, for fear I'd kill him.
That made him mad and he tried to bite me but then he had to drop the egg and I got it and ran.
Now he chased me but I was too fast for him, fleeing up through my badger hole and then tunneling, closing my tunnel behind me, forcing him to give chase.
I lost him for a while but when I was bunny-hopping my way home with my egg, he showed up as a wolf. I knew, instinctively, it was him.
So I tangled him with vines again but he snaked his way out of it. I became a bird and flew up, placing the egg in an impromptu nest. He turned into a bird, and I waited, crouching over the egg. He approached cautiously and...
I became a skunk and I sprayed him.
He fell, gagging, then turned into a cat, tumbled and landed on his feet.
I felt QUITE proud of myself for finding a way to stop him without hurting him. I carefully took the egg, turning into a bird again and flew down, then turned into a human. "Who are you?" I asked as he tried to rub his furry face in the grass.
He sighed and turned into a grey-furred pony wearing a platinum torc. Bitter Leaf!
"You have done very well. Mother Nature was right, you have grown." He said sternly, then tried hard to rub his face again. "No one has ever tried that before, I commend you."
"Why did you steal an egg?" What on earth is the head druid of my region doing stealing eggs in the middle of the night?
"As a test for you. If you would not challenge me, I would MAKE you," he said, then looked even more aggravated. "I can smell nothing but this stink," he said urgently.
"Turn human, they can't smell well," I recommended to him.
He changed and I changed and we walked back through the forest. Naked, but neither of us cared.
I don't know why humans care.
Eventually, I got him cleaned off with tomato juice. This woke up my pets and they helped.
"Did I pass?" I asked him once he no longer smelled bad.
"Yes," he said. "You have grown stronger." He sounded pleased. "Please tell me of your adventure."
And that's how I had a tea party at three in the morning while the house stank of tomato juice.
It was a good tea party too.
I think I'm going to face a lot more challenges in the future, but for now, I'm glad to have things settled down to normal.
Normal for me, anyway.
**************
Pinkie's Sugar Haze:
"You don't HAVE to sit on me," I said to Twilight.
"You said to make sure you write your parents every week," Twilight said. She AND Spike were sitting on me.
Sure, I'm an Earth pony, and if I had a basket I could probably carry all my friends, but it is uncomfortable; their weight is badly distributed.
"And to sit on you until you did it!" Spike said.
"It's hard to write with you sitting on me," I moaned.
"Don't be a baby," Spike said gleefully. "Get cracking."
I tried to think of what to write. It's just... Have you ever tried describing a party in detail? I could be here FOREVER trying to get it all in. And then it wouldn't be as cool as it was to live it. We had a huge party to celebrate our return and the Mayor got drunk and tried to get Blues Noteworthy to let her... Actually, I'm not sure what it was, but it involved...
Okay, my brain is melting just thinking about it.
I really can't tell Mother about that.
"Aaaargh, I am not good at writing. I fail at daughtering," I said, frustrated. "I need a letter-writing party."
"When the letter is done," Twilight said. "You could start with 'Dear Mother'."
Slowly, painfully, I began to grind out a letter, with Twilight correcting my spelling and grammar, while Spike grappled me.
Twist sauntered in. She had Snails following her for some reason. "Hi, Snails, Twist!" I said. I've always liked him, because like me, he likes SUGAR.
Which is probably why he's following Twist around.
He now tripped. "Hi, AAAHHH!!!" He's so awkward as he gets taller. "Hey, how did you get so big?" WHAM, he collided with us, Twist tried to come help, then she slid on something I forgot to sweep up and my letter flew into the air.
Spike got hit in the gut and set it on fire. "Ack!"
We all tumbled into the pantry and bags of everything fell on us.
"Did you just send Celestia the letter for my parents?" I asked him.
"Maybe," he said evasively.
I rose, wailing and gnashing my teeth. "All that for nothing!"
And there went the cinammon, just as everyone tried to get up.
"I hope you don't normally have your shop like this," Pinkamena said and I jumped. She'd come around the counter with our friends in tow. What is she doing here already? Isn't she coming next week?
The Cakes are gone until Thursday! I can't leave yet! We're going to go see the folks and visit the farm and reminisce about old times.
But I have to be responsible.
It IS NOT EASY.
But I am a BIG BIG Pony now and I have to do my best for my family here. The Cakes are trusting me and look at this mess.
I shook my head. We can turn this mess into food for everyone! I bet my friends are STARVING.
"It's all part of my secret plan to make the BIGGEST Cinnamon Swirl EVER," I said.
It is NOW.
"Ooooh," Spike, Twist, and Snails all said.
"Letter first, THEN baking," Twilight said.
"Letter?" Madame LeFlour asked. She gestured and the mess began cleaning itself up. Twist got a broom and helped while Snails followed her around.
"Get a broom, punk," Rocky said to Snails.
Snails frowned. "Punk? Punk? You want a piece of me?"
They began posturing at each other, trying to act tough.
"I could whip both your asses, you know," Spike said. "I'm a DRAGON."
"Bring it, you green chump," Rocky said dismissively.
"Rocky, they're just kids," Mr. Turnip said. He got a broom and helped to clean.
"Pinkie has to write a letter to her parents before she can play," Twilight said firmly. "She has to get in the habit."
Pinkamena waved a letter around. "I already wrote mine, so you had better get cracking, though since we're going tomorrow, we'll likely get there first."
"I can't go until Thursday! I thought we were going next week on the eighth," I told her.
"Today is the seventh," Pinkamena said, then facehoofed.
"Pinkie, I gave you a calendar!" Twilight said, frustrated.
I grabbed a broom. "Let's clean up, then I'll do the letter, THEN we can bake."
"Rocky, stop fronting at the kids," Pinkamena said to him, sounding aggravated. "They're just kids."
"I'm not a kid!" Spike said.
"Me neither!" Snails said. "I have the best cutie mark in Ponyville!"
Rocky began laughing and Snails suddenly began to concentrate and... nothing happened.
But he seemed to be still doing something.
Twilight sighed. "Pinkie, you have to break this up."
"ME?" I said. "I'm... better at causing riots."
"Yes, but this is your store," she said. "Your reponsibility to the Cakes."
Twitch. Responsibility, IT BURNS IT BURNS.
No, I am a new, bigger, better Pinkie who is responsible.
"We will settle this in an honorable way. Hurled Cupcakes at 20 paces."
"I will arm them and administer the duel while you clean up, Lady Pinkie," Sir Lintsalot said, ushering them outside with armnaments.
Soon, the rest of us got everything cleaned up. Then I started to plan the 'welcome to Ponyville' party for my friends and my sister, but Twilight grabbed me. "Letter, NOW."
"I will plan the party," Pinkamena said somberly.
How could I say no? She actually WANTS to throw a party?
"Spike can take you to set it up at my place," Twilight said. "I have to ensure this letter gets written."
By the time I closed up shop, I baked extra stuff for the party AND got the letter done. With Twilight's help. Everyone else had gone to...
You know, I never actually found out why Twist and Snails came to the store!
Oh man.
I hope they found what they needed, whatever it was.
We headed to Twilight's, with me pulling a cart of goods for the party; Twilight stopped at the liquor store and picked up some Darokinian whiskey and Heldaan vodka.
By the way, just because vodka is made with potatos does NOT mean you can freeze it and substitute it for potatos in a dish.
In case you were wondering.
That party did not go well.
Darkness was flowing out like a cloud from under the door when we reached Twilight's house and out the windows too. Twilight's eyes widened and she opened the door; slithering mist of darkness crept out and pulled us in.
Oh dear.
Everything was dimly lit by candles and tendrils of darkness drifted about. I felt black clothing suddenly appear on me, along with a silver ankh and now Twilight was wearing a black wizard hat, had fake fangs and a long black cloak. Also a black sweater vest with a tie. She stared at herself.
Everyone was totally spookied out, looking like ghosts or vampires or werewolves or... why was Ditzy inside a trash can with a plunger attached to it? She was scooting around on wheels making mechanical noises.
This would be a great Nightmare Night party... in about three months.
Dinky was now partly mechanical Dinky. But she liked it. She stomped over to me mechanically. "You will become one of us!" she said, intoning darkly. "We are the OARD."
"Pinkie's clean," Twist whispered to her.
Twilight made me take a bath, so yes, I am VERY clean.
Several people stared at us, then Twilight said, "Countess Vinicula wears an Ixion holy symbol painted blood red, and her hat has EARTH magic symbols, not ASTRAL magics." She sounded quite disappointed.
Bling, they changed and she blinked.
Pinkamena, dressed like a mummy, now came forward. "Oooh, I am so spooky," she said flatly.
"You have to be more emotional," I told her. "But this is a great idea!" In three months but baby steps, right? I have to encourage her.
"Vroom, vroom, fear my bumpers!" Dinky said, colliding playfully with me; I laughed and rolled around, while Pinkamena shook her head.
"Thank you," Pinkamena said. "It's all illusions," she said to Twilight.
Twilight nodded. "Darashed's Haunted Invocation, right?"
They started talking shop. I really need to study my bard magic more; I keep forgetting I have it unless I'm doing a party.
Studying, EEK.
But I have to learn more. Build my skills, get funnier. A lot funnier. I've seen a lot of people who need me. People who need some joy.
"Pinkamena, can you teach me some of your illusions? I need to improve my bard skills," I told her.
Her eyes widened, then she smiled, just for a moment, before returning to her usual look. "Of course, sister," she said.
Good. I'll need that for some really BIG pranks. If I'm going to be an Immortal, I am going to have to step up my game a LOT.
Those who don't know how to take a joke, will have to have one given to them.
And I'm just the pony for the job.
***************
Rainbow Dash's Reading Rainbow:
Twilight stared at me. "Are you reading a book?"
"I CAN READ," I shouted irritably. I wanted to double-check something before my date with Soarin', so Spike had been kind enough to help me out. "I did go to school, you know. Fluttershy can back me up on this."
Twilight waved her hooves apologetically. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't make fun of you for doing what I do all the time."
"Yeah," I said, settling down.
She came and looked. "Famous Battlefields of Equestria?" she said in surprise. "Oh, the Battle of the East River. From our adventure in White Plume Mountain."
"Soarin' and I have a picnic later today," I told her. "We're going there for it."
Twilight blinked. "Really?"
"I want to see the monument," I told her. "To remember those who fought and fell for Equestria. And even those who fought against us, even though it's hard for me to understand all this crazy shit."
Twilight looked very sad. "It was a darker time for everyone, human and pony alike."
It's weird, I can feel... Just reading this, I get a little feeling of the bonds between those who fought. Part of me is excited to see what the battlefield will be like.
And part is kind of scared.
"You're reading a book?" Scootaloo said in shock.
"I CAN READ!" I shouted.
Scootaloo fell over, legs in the air.
I'd laugh more if I hadn't seen her parents do it too. Man, I really got them last Nightmare Night. Yelled boo in the window and they all rolled over, legs in the air.
"I was thinking maybe you'd want to go flying," Scootaloo said hesitantly.
"I'm sorry, I have a date," I told her. "Another time, Scoots."
"Aww," she said.
"Anyway, I hear Golden Harvest keeps Oards in her storage shed, so you should check it out," I told her.
That should keep her busy today.
You can't change all the way at once.
Hehe.
She ran off excitedly and Twilight said, warningly, "You shouldn't lie to impressionable young fillies."
"Geez, it's just a joke, Twilight."
"Anyway, I have a date myself," she said.
"Oooh, who's the lucky pony?"
"West Wind. We're flying down to Hoofington and hitting a nice restaurant he likes."
"Oh hoh, once you go pegasus, you never go back, you know," I said, grinning.
She turned beet red. "We're not like serious or anything yet, just friends, I mean, I think about it sometimes but it's not like... I have to go find my bookmark!" She galloped off.
I wish them luck. Even if nothing comes of it, it means no more thinking about the fish that got away. Fall down seven times... something... Anyway, keep getting up.
I finished my reading, then flew over to Fluttershy's. She'd been kind enough to agree to pack a lunch for us. I'm not a great cook. Fortunately, I have simple tastes, but I wanted something fancier for this.
It smells spicy, whatever it is. I wanted a surprise, so she didn't tell me, just smiled so brightly.
I flew at high speed to Canterlot and found Soarin' on the roof of the palace. "Hey," I said softly.
We kissed and he said, "I missed you."
"I missed you too," I told him. We only get to meet when we're both free, which mostly means when he's free, which is not too often. But we have ALL DAY to spend together.
We caught up on gossip on the way to our picnic spot, which took some effort to spot. To my surprise, there was a fancy carriage there, with royal guards standing around looking bored. Not Celestia's carriage, didn't look Lunar... who could it be?
There is a simple monument here, put up by a historial society about a century ago. For a long time the battle was forgotten and now it's all farms and forest with the Everfree on the other side and the road from East Point to Eight Horse Hitch running along the river. The monument stands by the road, overlooking a carrot farm and a wheat farm.
We got closer; the monument shows a unicorn, an earth pony, and a pegasus facing off against a human knight, an archer, and a wizard. The unicorn is Duke Swift Hoof Blueblood II and the knight is King Corin II Anselwind. The others... I forgot already.
Dammit.
Duke Blueblood was here with an earth pony with an abacus attending him; they both quietly, somberly really, studied the monument.
I should beat the crap out of that bastard for what he did to Rarity.
But I think Marcus is first in that line.
"Duke Blueblood," Soarin' said, bowing.
I didn't bow. He and his title can bite me.
He turned, surprised, then nodded his head to us. "Rainbow Dash, Element of Loyalty. Soarin' of the Wonderbolts. Hail and well met." Then he turned back to the statues.
What, that's all? I reallllly should kick his ass.
Soarin' shook his head at me and led me forward. We all studied them quietly, then Soarin' asked, "I know the one in the middle is your ancestor, but what about the other two?"
He told us about them quietly, almost grimly; he knew a lot. I'd actually heard of the pegasus, Swift Rider, but not in this context. He could actually outrun air elementals, they say. And the earth Pony was actually Purposeful Ramblin', the Count of Hoofington. He killed Count Marsin of Akorros, causing one of the wings to break on the Darokin army.
Killed him.
I shivered at the thought. Equestria hasn't had a full scale war in a long time. I don't want to have to kill humans or elves or dwarves or halflings. Or other ponies.
For a moment, I could see the battle in progress, an ocean of death. Yet in that were moments of bravery and heroism and loyalty. The charge of the Whinneychester Heavies to save the Baron of Bitsmore... It was horrible and wonderful at once.
But we're past that, right?
"I wish," Duke Blueblood said, studying the field as I did. "Equestria is strong, but sooner or later, someone will try again. Maybe even soon."
"The dreams were just dreams," the abacus carrying earth Pony said. "There will not be a war." His loyalty to Blueblood was so intense as to stun me. WHY?
"Not any time soon but sooner or later, the humans will go crazy and try to conquer us again," Soarin' said. "When they get overcrowded, they conquer their neighbors." He shook his head. "Or sell them things." He sounded a little embarrassed.
"Did you get tourist trapped when you went to Minrothad?" I teased him.
"I still don't know why I bought that little set of swinging balls that hit each other," he confessed, then sighed.
"The war won't happen," I told him. "We prevented it." How did he know?
"I hope you are right," he said. "I once dreamed of glory but now I have seen glory." Blueblood made a face. "It is a terrible thing. War. Better I fade and be forgotten than that I achieve reknown that way."
"It certainly costs too much and is inefficient," the earth pony said.
"What's your name?" I asked him.
"Precise Sums," he told me. "I have served the Blueblood line for many years like my ancestors have for generations."
"He is invaluable to me," Blueblood said in his somber way. "Anyway, enjoy your picnic. This is the anniversary, so I came to see it."
"But no one is here," I said. And I somehow didn't even NOTICE.
Dammit.
"Most would rather forget this ever happened," he said. "But I have to remember."
I could sense his ties to his ancestors. The burden of it, weighing on him.
Dammit, I don't want sympathy, I want to hate him without remorse.
But now I can't.
We said goodbye and Soarin' and I ate our picnic and I tried to cheer up. It was spicy noodles in tomato sauce. Very good. Lots of little vegetable bits in it. Kind of messy but we enjoyed cleaning each other afterwards.
Hah!
Then we laid in the grass and watched the sky. Had to let our stomachs settle before some flying. "Sorry I took you somewhere depressing," I said apologetically.
"It's cool," he said. "Good meal, good company. Look, I know you want to go hit the north pole. If you wait a bit, I should be able to arrange time off to go with you."
"Thanks," I said. "This is important to me, but really I should plan."
Later. For now, I'm with the pony I love and everything is good. Let's hope it lasts.
He now reached in his saddlebags and pulled out his chess set. "Time for your lesson!"
Ack.
******************
Twilight's Tale:
I laid in the grassy field. "Okay, obviously this plan wasn't as well thought through as I thought."
I had used the wings spell so West Wind and I could fly together. This was really cool, except that one, everyone who saw us freaked out because I looked like an alicorn and two, I don't have a pegasi's endurance.
"I can carry you," he said.
I'm too big to... oh, MAGIC.
West Wind was blue with a white mane, wearing a nice suit. I shrank myself and got into his pocket, which really amused him.
Then I rested as we flew.
We chatted about things; it was nice to relax and just forget all my larger burdens with a friend. He's... if he lived in Ponyville, I'd get more serious but we both know that we can't see each other too often.
But that's fine. I'd rather practice just having some male friends before I get serious with someone again. Just take it light and easy.
I have bigger priorities, anyway. Those comets won't map themselves and I'm studying enchanting items and planning for the polar expedition. Which should be very cool.
Hehe.
But for now, I want a nice relaxing day off with a friend, away from all my problems and difficulties.
Hoofington came into sight. It's a good sized town, not a lot bigger than Ponyville, but much more trade oriented with lots of nice restaurants. We're going to hit a Boldavian one he says is excellent, A Thousand Nights of Potatos. I'm curious to try their vodka, as you get the best from Karameikos and Boldavia.
As we wheeled around, I heard a distant 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA' coming from the Northwest, up the Canterlot Road.
It was a screaming Big Macintosh in a suit, hang gliding with Vanilla Surprise, towards the city.
West Wind and I stared in unison, then he said, "Do they need help?"
"Let's keep an eye on them," I told him.
West Wind wheeled around precisely and tracked them from above. They were going to miss the landing area for hang gliders and other flying things and go crashing into the far wall of the city, so he dove down and I used my magic to help them land smoothly. Big Macintosh flopped over and I hopped out, returning to normal size and dismissing my flight spell. Best to look...
Everyone stared at me since I was about the size of Big Macintosh.
Ahaha.
I introduced them both to West Wind and him to them. "I remember, we met at the club," Vanilla Surprise said smoothly. "It's a pleasure to meet you; Twilight speaks well of you."
He smiled at her. "Thank you."
Why did they hang-glide here when they could have taken the train?
Well, it's their business.
"We're off to A Thousand Nights of Potatos," Vanilla Surprise said. "I understand there will be a performance by the famous Bard Vladmir Petrovich today there. And dancing."
Oooh, that will be fun, I thought. "That's where we're going too."
We ended up making a double date of it and had a good time. It's strange to socialize with Celestia like this, but fun too. We rarely get to just relax together. I guess she has more free time with Luna back.
It'll be back to work and a future... in the stars... soon, but for now, I can relax and be a normal pony and that's nice too. Destiny will come soon enough without rushing it.
I can look to the future without the past haunting me. And that's what I want. Because I've got a bright future ahead of me.
As the stars came out that night, I looked up at them and smiled. See you soon, my friends. See you soon, up close and personal.
But for now... dancing.
***************
Celestia's Epilogue:
I rule with a light hand; in domestic affairs, I largely leave matters to my ministers and rule very lightly. One day, I will have to leave. Much as I love this place, I cannot focus on Equestria forever. Further, it is the job of Immortals to deal with what mortals cannot, not to control them. My ponies must stand on their own four hooves.
I do not want to end up like Vanya, who leads mortals to die by the thousands in her hunger for glory, or uncaring Rathanos, who sits back and watches people die while he pursues his stupid obsession with turning mortals into fire beings. We already have fire elementals and other sentient fire beings. Or Rafiel and Rad, who prize knowledge above people. Or Sinbad, who wanders the planes and barely notices his worshippers.
Nothing is harder than finding that balance where you neither ignore the mortal realm nor trample it underfoot. I know I have not always found it. In the first years after I lost Luna, I despaired and wandered and lost my way. It felt like it had all been for nothing. My realm fell apart; it had depended far too much on Luna and I, and with her gone and myself lost in despair, it descended into a dark age.
It recovered and so did I, having learned a valuable lesson. Ironically, it was Mother mocking me for my failure that was the start of me pulling out of my crash dive. I was determined to prove her wrong, that my ponies could build a great kingdom.
And they have. I have nudged and guided but in the end, they rule Equestria. I reign but rule as little as I can. Much of my time is spent trying to figure out a better solution to my greatest problem.
"Moping does not become you, my princess," Moondancer said to me as I stood on the balcony, staring off towards the distant Sea of Dread. I know, it's hard to imagine the peaceful waters of Equestria as part of the Sea of Dread, but ultimately, all of this region touches its waters.
She glided over, moving gracefully as always, then nuzzled me gently. I smiled and folded a wing over her. "You are a great comfort to me," I told her.
"Thank you," she said, resting her head gently on my side. With Twilight moved onto her own road, Moondancer has been my personal student, and Luna's as well. She is essential to our work of ensuring the things sleeping under Equestria never, ever wake up. And it is good to have a friend. "I have good news and bad."
"The bad?" I said. Best to get it out of the way.
"I have investigated who sent the children to the mountain. It was your father," Moondancer said.
I heard a splashing noise in my bedroom. "Mother," Cunning Thought said. "I am Celestia's MOTHER. I was in labor for FOUR DAYS with her, then FIVE with Luna. It was worse than the time Thor broke all my bones."
Moondancer jumped and pressed against me. "You followed me?" she squeaked.
"Child, did you seriously think you could spy on the secrets of an Immortal without me noticing?" Cunning Thought said, coming out to join us. "Mind you, I respect you for trying. And with a few more years practice, you might get away with it. But if you try that with, say, Odin, you will find out why it was unwise to try."
"She is under my protection," I said firmly to Mother, just to be sure. "If you have to take it out on someone, take it out on me."
"Now, now, Celestia, is that any way to greet your mother?" She circled to the other side of me from Moondancer and nuzzled me.
I nuzzled back, sighing. "Hello, Mother. Should I get Luna?"
"Be a good girl, Moondancer and fetch my other darling daughter," Mother said. Her tone was light but I knew what she wanted.
Something not for mortal ears is going to come out.
Moondancer teleported in a spray of moonlight.
"Does she know you had your eye on her to replace your sister if need be? Does Luna know?" Mother asked cheerfully.
"Nothing could replace Luna, but someone had to take her place as one of the Guardians, you know," I told him.
"You forget, one of our Hierarchs put those little snoozing worms down there," Cunning Thought said cheerfully. "It's not my job to stop them. They're not Outer Beings or invaders from another Dimension."
"So if you had to decide between me or a talking skeleton, you'd go with the skeleton?" I said. "Whose undead laid waste to your country five hundred years ago?"
Mother made a face. "They were supposed to attack the city states of Borea."
"Yes, I'm sure it was merely an accident. No doubt Thanatos became the hierarch of Entropy by bumbling his way to the top," I said cooly.
Mother gave me the odd look. I wish I knew what it meant, as it could mean 'yes, I would choose Thanatos if I had to' or it could mean 'I don't know what I'd do' or it could mean 'I am in serious trouble if I admit that I would, in the end, put my children first'. Few Immortals have children. Even fewer have ones who actually achieved Immortality. And to my knowledge, no other Immortal has children on the other side of the Law/Chaos conflict.
A moonbeam now shone down from the moon and on it, Luna descended in glory. I could hear Ponies being awestruck across the palace.
"You are SUCH a ham," Mother said, then came over and nuzzled her. She returned it with a clear attitude of standing off. Luna has extremely conflicted feelings about Mother, even more so than myself, and since her return to normality, she generally acts as if Mother was beneath her.
It makes Mother laugh, which angers Luna.
"I am not a ham, I am an Immortal. I conduct myself with dignity and..." Luna began.
A shimmering image formed on the balcony, showing Lunette and Ivan throwing pies at each other and laughing.
"MOTHER!!!" Luna protested. Her aura of glory and power winked out.
I couldn't help but laugh, just like Mother. This, of course, made Luna EVEN ANGRIER. She drew herself up, spreading her wings and trying instinctively to look larger.
This caused Mother to fall down and roll around, laughing. Luna spluttered.
I nuzzled Luna gently. "It's okay, dear. Mother is just trying to rile you. It's her way of showing affection."
"Seeing Luna make faces always makes me happy. Being so easy to tease just makes me want to tease you more," Mother said, righting herself. "Not as fun as teasing Rathanos. Who actually tried to seduce me the other day."
Luna and I blinked audibly. "What?" Luna said. She sounded offended.
"Tell me... of course you slept with him," I said, burying my face in my wings.
"Of course I did, and I made off with the artifact he was stupidly carrying. However, he stole some of my eggs, and I am curious to see how badly whatever idea he has in mind goes, so I won't stop him. This should be HILARIOUS." Mother laughed loudly.
Luna hid her face as well; both of us doing this just made Mother laugh more. "What on Mystara was he thinking?" Luna said plaintively.
"I won't pretend I understand how Rathanos thinks. I think it's the first time he's had sex since he was a mortal, though. I was not impressed. Big Macintosh was much better," Mother said, shaking her head.
"You slept with Celestia's boyfriend?" Luna squeaked.
"She's lying," I said. "Big Macintosh would be buried under a trio of mares if he would sleep with any mare who raised her tail for him," I told Luna. "And we're not lovers yet."
"You're just trying," Mother said. "Like I had to try and see if you would fall for it. That being said, Big Macintosh could not actually be clumsier than Rathanos, though he might have done better if he hadn't been covertly stealing some of my eggs the whole time."
"How does that even WORK?" Luna squeaked, embarrassed.
"Did you forget about how reproduction works when you abandoned your mother's team?" Mother said mournfully. "You and Ivan may have problems in that case."
"We are not lovers, we're just friends!" Luna protested.
I'm not sure what is up with them, but it is Luna's business. She could certainly use a boyfriend. "Luna has, in fact, given birth, you know."
"That is what makes it even more confusing," Mother said, being deliberately obtuse.
"I meant that you normally can't steal someone's eggs while having sex with them!"
"It was rather ingenious," Mother said. "But I'm sure you can figure it out if you think about it."
I don't really want to.
Luna, on the other hand, took this as a challenge and soon was focused on the problem.
"So when are you and Marcus going to give me some grandchildren?" Mother asked me.
"I'll let you know," I told her. It's best never to waste time fighting Mother head-to-head. You always lose, even if you win.
"Mother, you need to stay away from Sweetie Belle," Luna said firmly.
"Too late," Mother said cheerfully. "Just because they live in your country doesn't mean you can keep out other Pony Immortals."
"You weren't born a pony," Luna muttered, irritated.
"And you aren't really a pony either, though it lingers," Mother said.
She's right. I've come to understand that; Luna lost a lot of time in her slumber, and before that, neither of us left Pony form very often.
"Sweetie is a dear little girl," Mother said. "So trusting, just like Twilight was when you stepped in to mold her to your will, daughter," she continued to me.
I twitched. "I had to help her, so she could handle her talent."
"Of course you did. And Sweetie needs my help. You both have too much on your plate, whereas I have honed Hule to where it runs itself. Leaving me lots of free time for other projects," Mother said. "Like helping out my daughters by reducing all their neighbors to impotent, shattered wreckage which can't threaten Equestria."
"Mother, we can handle it!" Luna said urgently.
"Further, the Oard menace is something which needs to be taken seriously before it affects EVERYONE," Mother continued, turning to face me.
"Before it hits Hule," I said flatly.
"And Darokin and Equestria and Minrothad... actually, Minrothad could do with some stirring up," Mother said. "Remember, if the Oards win, we all cease to exist."
"They cannot break through the vigilance of the Immortals of Time," Luna said urgently.
"If that was true, they'd have been eliminated long ago," Mother said. "I take them seriously."
"By sending children after them," Luna said, frowning.
"I seem to remember someone else doing that against an Immortal with remarkable success," Mother said, taking a moment to brush my side with her wings. "It's amazing how much fluff you build up in a day, Celestia."
I frowned. "Where?"
She began grooming me as we talked.
"They weren't children," I said firmly. Then I sighed. "It's too late for them to have a normal childhood now, I know."
"Children don't want a normal childhood, they want adventure, like you two did," Mother said, determinedly brushing my side. "Did you roll around in a pile of wool today?"
"No," I said. "But it is a cleaning day."
"I should have brought a brush," Mother grumbled and kept working.
"Yes, but we had no idea what it was going to actually be like," Luna said. She sighed and started grooming me as well. "Sometimes you must ride the tide, yes, as I did. But I made sure I was there to protect them."
"You used their creation gleefully and without hesitation and enjoyed it," Mother said and Luna winced. "It was just as I would hope my daughter would do." Luna winced more.
I tried to show no reaction. The more you let Mother get your goat, the more she goes for your goat, so to speak. "We can...," I began.
"You are too busy," Mother said. "Consider it a test. Have you produced a land which can handle me or not? Don't you say you put your trust in your mortals to act wisely without you mother henning them?" She worked on one of my legs. "I think we are going to have to give up and just bathe you. Are you deliberately making more fluff?"
"I could use a bath," I admitted. There is a part of me which very much wants to just bathe with my family like a normal person would. To have a mother I could trust. Father died long ago, though his soul dwells with Odin and I visit him sometimes. I am grateful to Odin for that.
"Then let us go," Luna said. "Mother is... right. You need a bath. It's like a pillow spilt and you wallowed in it."
The pillow fight was days ago and I have been groomed since then. This is probably one of Mother's pranks. The bath is probably rigged to dye us pink again.
I will take the chance.
But Mother goes through the door first.
"But why Sweetie?" Luna asked.
"That is for me to know and you to find out," Mother said with that annoying 'I have a secret, ha ha' tone she has. "Ivan, would you like to come out of the shadows where you've been spying on us with Whelm ready to smack me and join us?"
"..." I looked around; I had noticed nothing.
Ivan made a gurgling noise and stepped out of the shadows. "Dammit," he said, Whelm in hand.
"You would have died horribly if you had tried anything but it was sweet of you to try," Mother said, nuzzling him cheerfully. "Did Luna put you up to it, or did you get up on the suicidal side of the bed this morning? And if you say something like 'I won't let you hurt her', I will have to laugh, then ask you to kiss her so I can get a picture of it," she said.
Ivan made incoherent noises.
"Come, Ivan," I said. "Mother won't hurt you as long as you don't give her an excuse."
"Now, I noticed all your proteges are on growth hormones," Mother said as we teleported to the baths. "And you're dating a rather large pony. So what's your secret plan, hmm? Time to upgrade the size of your followers?"
"Oh yes," I said fatuously. "Big is better." Best to just tease back.
Some days I can herd Mother, some days she herds me. I'm not sure which category today falls in. We will see.
***************
Ivan's Epilogue:
I leaned on the railing with Lunette; we both were wearing very fancy clothing, looking like Specularum merchants who had enough money to spend their time watching the Karameikan Assembly of Warriors waste its time on blather. It's the house of the legislature for nobles.
Sir Emil von Hendricks, cousin and representative of Ludwig von Hendricks, the Black Eagle Baron, the worst of the nobles of Karameikos, was busy yammering on about how the halflings were raiding his cousin's lands and the Grand Duke needed to do something about it and the 'bandits' harbored by Luln were causing him trouble too.
As if he didn't deserve every bit of it.
But I am being patient. It isn't easy but bringing these bastards down is going to be a long term project. I can be patient.
As long as Lunette sometimes pins me down.
"Got it," Scootaloo said and I jumped.
She passed me the documents, grinning. "How did I do?"
"You're good," I told her. Lock-picking she's not so good at, but with those cloaks and her own grace as a pegasus? VERY sneaky.
She's going to be a good apprentice, I think.
She smiled brightly. "Now, do we make a dramatic getaway?"
"We walk out quietly, then slip into the shadows and return to Ponyville before you get in trouble for breaking curfew again," I told her.
Lunette nodded. "And I return to Canterlot." She ruffled Scootaloo's hair fondly. "Let's go, student."
"I wish I didn't have to go back to school soon," she mumbled.
The summer is slipping away but that's okay. I need to build up my skills and my knowledge.
I probably shouldn't let Scootaloo be involved in this but I need an apprentice and she would jump in anyway. You can't stop those kids, you just can point them at something productive instead of destructive.
"We'll just practice when you're out of school," I told her. "Come on. Let's go get some ice cream."
"ICE CREAM!"
"I know just the place in Baltimare," Lunette said, and off we went, following her.
Things are looking up, I think.
I'm sure Marcus will blow up the whole country before the Winter Solstice, though.
**************
Final Epilogue (Marcus-o-Vision):
"If I die, I'll miss school and flunk!" Sweetie wailed.
And I'll lose my job if I die; I'm going to be teaching some special courses at the Ponyville school, working with Cherilee, who Rarity assures me is a very easy-going, enthusiastic pony.
Right now, though, the two of us were clinging to a board as we slowly drift away from the wreckage of the yacht we stupidly rented for a triple cute-cenara for Apple Bloom, Sweetie, and Scootaloo.
In the future, all presents acquired by Snips and Snails will be searched THREE TIMES before they are brought into my presence, especially if they think it is 'cool'.
Damn you flail-snails of fear and flame!!!!!
Also, whoever spiked the punch, DIES.
"My poor dress!" Sweetie wailed. It was a water-logged mess.
"I'll make you a new one," Rarity said, surfacing.
I put a leg around her; I was in pony form for the party, since it was a particularly pony-esque thing.
We all clung together. "We have to stop meeting like this," Rarity said dryly and we both laughed.
We laughed less when the catoblepas lurched out of the forest and stared at us; I could feel the malice of his deadly gaze.
So I set him on fire.
Horns have their advantages.
He flung himself in the water and when he came up, an elf shot him in the ass and he fled. "Hello there," the elf said, looking at all the ponies strung out up and down the river, trying to fight the current before it swept us all the way to Hoofington. It was mainly unicorns, the least athletic, who were still stranded in the river.
Like us.
A human woman in green and black now came out, leaning on a staff. "Hail, Ponies, I am Tabitha Franich of Franich House and we are the Society of Seven Rings. Do you need help?"
"Yes," I told her. "Please."
"We're from Ponyville!" Sweetie said. "Are you adventurers?" she asked eagerly. "I'm an adventurer too!"
They soon pulled us out of the river and we guided them back to Ponyville, picking up stranded ponies as we went. We had quite the herd by the time we reached the bridge.
"What brings you to Ponyville?" Rarity asked them curiously.
"Hidden treasure?" Apple Bloom asked hopefully.
"A monster to root out? We're still looking for the time monster," Scootaloo said.
The time monster I suspect Loki made up.
They began telling their tale and I felt a little twinge.
But not yet. There will be adventures in the future, but I want some peace and quiet for a while.
Ahahaha.
I want to be near medical attention when the disasters inevitably strike, at least.
Here with friends and people who love me.
And kids I am going to have to kill for... "What happened to the flail snail?" I asked.
I heard the mayor scream distantly.
"To the rescue!" Sweetie shouted and we all took off to save her.
Together.
We come into this world alone, but I intend to leave it in a group.
That really didn't come out right.
I am worried that stupid snail will hurt someone but I am happy to be here with those I love. For them, I can face anything.
Or for financial gain, but you can't change all at once.
Love of treasure is a natural thing. And something I share with my lady love.
The worst part of this snail, after all, is that it's unlikely to have ANY TREASURE AT ALL.
"Don't remind me," Rarity said softly and we both laughed.
Apparently I can't stop narrarating my thoughts without realizing it either.
At least I am not on fire.
Lily ran by, shouting, "THE HORROR! THE HORROR!"
Her tail WAS on fire, so I put it out with the water spell I learned from Twilight.
"Thanks!" she said. "But now it's RUINED."
That was, of course, Rarity's cue. It was shorter when she finished but back to a nice clean shape.
This got her a hug while the adventurers rushed ahead of us to go after the snail. We then ran after them, realizing Sweetie had gone ahead with them.
The enthusiasm of youth.
We sped up just to be sure, in time to see the snail being flung towards the Everfree with Snails riding ON IT, shouting something about cowboys.
It is best I never, ever understand or ask.
Trust me.
I gave a happy little sigh. A good run feels invigorating. One that doesn't end with me on fire, even better.
It's good to be in love and good to be alive.
I hope every day isn't like this, though.
There had better be treasure some of the time.
I kissed Rarity and we began herding the kids and getting the mayor off the roof she'd somehow stranded herself on.
Just another typical day in Ponyville.
Which explains a lot.
Pinkie now popped up and waved at the air. "Goodbye, everyone! Hope you enjoyed the show! If we the characters have offended, once you eat some candy, it will be amended!" She paused. "No, wait, that's not right."
"Pinkie, even the Immortals don't actually know for sure that the Old Ones exist beyond the Sixth Dimension," I told her. "You can't just address them and expect them to hear you." There are rumors among the Immortals of a higher stage where you become one of the Old Ones, who watch over many universes, but whether they exist and how, if possible, you can join them, remains a mystery.
Pinkie waved to someone I couldn't see. "The Book of Kagyar says otherwise!"
"Pinkie, you annotated your copy with cookie recipes," I told her.
"Just wave to them, okay?" she said.
So I waved to anyone who might be watching us.
"Say goodnight, Sammy," she said.
"Goodnight, Sammy," I said, laughing.
She laughed loudly too. "We'll all return soon in... Goldeneye. No wait, that's someone else." She scratched her head.
Best to end this before she really does pierce the Sixth Dimension somehow.
Anyway, if any of the Old Ones are watching, hello there and please don't destroy us. In fact, please send us lots of treasure.
"And pastries," Pinkie said.
And pastries.
Rarity then dragged me off and this tale came to an end, but I'm sure we'll meet again.
And it had BETTER NOT INVOLVE ME NEARLY DROWNING.
The End (for now) |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Sequel Short Story: The Bringers of War | This short story is part of the continuity of my story Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring. I have retconned something from the original story, as I have decided to make Cadence and Shining Armor part of this story's canon.
The whole story is from Twilight's perspective.
--John
*******************
The Bringers of War
By John Biles
Part of the Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring canon.
*******************
"HEEEELP ME!" I heard Pinkie shout in the distance. I was busy trying to finally solve the Four Solid Body problem which had eluded me for so long. However, a casual remark from Spike about things floating in milk had *finally* unlocked the answer to it.
Or so I hoped as I needed another half hour or so to get it to work.
I prayed this wasn't some Pinkie prank and I promptly teleported to where she'd been yelling.
This landed me in a street nearby; Pinkie, however, was far down the street, pulling a very large cart full of desserts; she was running full tilt and there did not, in fact, seem to be anything she needed saving from.
Then Spike shouted from the balcony of the library, "Twilight, if you can hear me, I just got a message from Celestia!"
It never rains but it pours, as Grandmother says.
"Read it, I have to save Pinkie or possibly lecture her for wasting my time!" I shouted and teleported over to Pinkie.
Who kept going; I gave up on teleporting and ran after her. "Pinkie, what's wrong?"
"If I stop, the cart keeps going and if it hits me, I'll lose all this food I'm supposed to deliver!" Pinkie shouted.
Studying her as she ran, I could see that she'd rigged up some improvised hitch with ropes instead of using the cart's actual hitch, which was now propped up so it wouldn't drag on the ground using more ropes. Why wasn't she using a proper hitch which would transmit her slowing down to the wagon? So the laws of motion dictated it continued to move, since she could only transmit acceleration, not deceleration with the ropes. But why not just use the wagon's rig?
"Pinkie, why didn't you properly hitch yourself to this wagon?" I asked. I had this vague feeling of impending doom and I didn't know why.
"I'm too big and the halter doesn't fit me any more!" she wailed. "And I didn't have time to buy a new one because then everything would be *late*."
I felt foolish for not noticing the problem; we've all grown a lot larger as we begin to progress towards Immortality. I hadn't thought about it because I rarely pull a cart and like most Ponies, I only wear clothing for formal occasions. My bed is still big enough, though if I reach Celestia's size, I'll need a new bed.
Among other things.
I began to telekinetically push on the cart, slowing it. "Gradually slow down, Pinkie." She gradually slowed down from a gallop to a canter to a trot to a walk. We stopped about ten feet shy of the docks on the East River.
"Where were you delivering these?" I asked her.
"Filthy Rich ordered them for his daughter's birthday party," Pinkie said. "Diamond Tiara probably would have cried for hours with no cake!"
I stared at the huge amount of desserts. "Nopony can eat that much dessert, not even you."
"*Party*," Pinkie said. "All her friends will come and eat cake and everything else too. It's just, she's the birthday girl."
"Well, I hope she has a good time," I told Pinkie. "I'll help you get the cart over, then you had best go get a new halter at the..." I paused. "Wherever you buy one." I've never actually bought one.
"I'll have to ask Big Macintosh," Pinkie said. "I've never actually bought one that wasn't free with the cart."
"The cart shop, then," I said. "Let's go!"
***************
You know how things mount up. Spike sent me a letter, but I didn't have time to read it because we had to stop the Crusaders from 'inspecting the desserts for Oards', then deliver the desserts, then go to the cart shop and then we both had to sit for halter fittings, since I needed a bigger one, then we had to get lunch and then Daisy somehow got stranded on a cloud. So I had to get her down and then the Mayor needed me to fix the new Early Warning Monster Detection System, which of course turned out to actually be some shiny rocks in a box and a complete *fraud*.
So I went to go get Spike to send a complaint to the Magical Registration Bureau, which had allegedly inspected this thing, and he said, "Celestia needs to see you, like right now. I've been running all over town trying to find you."
Oh no, now I've let Celestia down! Spike had even sent me a letter immediately, and I *didn't read it!* I could have avoided messing up but I didn't! Guilt plagued me as I rushed down to the station and hopped the next train with Spike, spending the whole time fretting that I would have to start over on Immortality from scratch. This is what happens when my careful planning gets disrupted!
My nightmares of having to go all the way back to being a filly were disrupted by arriving in Canterlot. Moondancer was standing there, looking bored, but she perked up when I arrived.
"It's good to see you again, Twilight," she said cheerfully.
I suddenly became keenly aware that I was taller than everypony and all of them were looking at me. Which happens all the time now. "It's nice to see you too," I told her, suddenly feeling guilty I had blown off her birthday party back when I left Canterlot to go to Ponyville. But I was a different pony, then.
"I am going to teleport us to save time," she said. "Since you're late."
I winced at that and Spike got on my back to make it easier for her to move us; it's harder for him to climb up, though; I've grown more than him. So I gave him a little telekinetic nudge.
Moondancer moved in close to us, her black mane with silver star-flecks spilling about. Then her mane suddenly spread out like a thundercloud and there were stars everywhere and then we were inside a stone room I didn't recognize. The walls were laden with runes and the floor and ceiling too. I could feel massive amounts of magic.
"What is this?" I asked her.
"It's a secure teleportation room. Anyone without a cutie mark can't get in at all, and it only allows those with certain marks to teleport in or out," Moondancer said. She pointed to the walls; I could see my own mark, a platinum helmet (which I didn't recognize as that of anyone I know), Moondancer's, Luna, and Celestia. The one for me looked recently added.
"How did I get in?" Spike asked.
"My magic brought you," Moondancer said. She opened the door out with her magic; there were two squads each of Earth Pony, Unicorn, and Pegasus soldiers outside, in a large square stone room; there were no windows and the air was weakly magical. Further, the room was teleport-blocked. And scrying-blocked. And a lot of other things were barred too.
Where on Mystara are we?
The Captain of the Guards was a huge Earth Pony, as big as I am or Big Mac, who wore rune-covered armor. His platinum helmet cutie mark was the same as the one I'd seen in the teleportation chamber, but how could an Earth Pony teleport? I guess it's not impossible he learned Wizardry, but it's very hard for non-Unicorns. I would have thought I would have heard of him.
Or could he be a Bard? But I don't think Bards can teleport.
"The Princesses are waiting," he said impatiently, looking displeased at us.
Now I really wanted to die. "I am so sorry, sir, things were very hectic in Ponyville."
"Twilight, this is Captain Blue Pop," Moondancer said, sounding close to laughing. This made the captain grimace more. "Captain Blue Pop, this is Twilight Sparkle, student of Princess Celestia." She emphasized 'Celestia'.
He grumbled, then said, "They are awaiting you."
"Why on Mystara are you named Blue Pop?" Spike asked.
SPIKE!!!!
"Why hasn't someone made you into gumbo, alligator boy?" Captain Blue Pop said irritably. "Moondancer, there are no pets on the guest list."
"Spike goes where Twilight goes," Moondancer said smoothly. "He's only a baby, please forgive him."
"I am a *young* dragon! I already had my first period of Dragonsleep!" Spike protested.
Moondancer glared at him, and he said, "I'm sorry, Captain." He didn't sound very sorry.
"The Princess trusts Spike's discretion to transmit messages," I told him. "Please let him in. Also, he is a dragon, not an alligator-man." I quickly sketched out a picture of the alligator-men who live in Western Brun. "They are known as Gurrash. You may notice the prolonged snout, the tall muscular build and the long tail, all of which Spike is lacking."
"He doesn't look much like a dragon either," Captain Blue Pop said irritably. "Anyway. Go!" He pointed to the only exit door.
I suddenly wondered how all these guards got down here if the only way in was teleporting. As I assume they are guarding the room beyond and it's not how they got in.
But we went without further ado.
*******************
"I am muscular," Spike grumbled as he walked with us into the room in which the Princesses were. "Hi, Princess Luna, Princess Celestia!", he said cheerfully. "Hello... hello?" He was now staring at the third figure in the room.
It was a spectral pony, translucent and purple like myself in color but with a curly red mane and a long beard. He was male and wore a pointed hat and a robe covered with stars and fringed with bells.
It couldn't be.
I stared, eyes wide.
"Starswirl the Bearded?" I said in absolute shock.
"I am but his creation," the spectral pony said, but he smiled, clearly pleased to be known. "It is my duty to watch over our guests below."
"Guests," Luna said, frowning.
"Welcome, Twilight, to one of the greatest secrets of Equestria," Celestia said to me, then came over and nuzzled me gently. I blushed a little and nuzzled her back. She's always so kind to me.
While we did this, Moondancer was talking quietly to Luna and Spike wobbled on my back, then hugged Celestia's head.
In addition to Luna, Celestia and the Starswirl construct, this room had runes of protection all over the walls and in the center was a very large cabinet attached to cables; it looked like it could be sent down through a hole in the floor.
"This chamber allows us to descend to a room so secret we cannot mention it until we reach it," Luna said solemnly. "Let us go quickly."
Celestia gently nuzzled her sister, who jumped. "Relax, dear. It will be fine."
The fact that this made Luna nervous made me nervous. If an Immortal becomes jumpy, it is not irrational to feel jumpy yourself. But I did a quick mental exercise and then I followed them into the cabinet, which then began to descend.
"You must be very old," I said to the construct. "What is your name, sir?"
"I am the Watcher," he said. "But Celestia liked to call me Ruddy, and that is fine too."
"But you're not actually ruddy," I said hesitantly.
"His hair," Spike said.
"Manes and coats can't really be ruddy," I said to Spike.
"Are you alright? You are exceptionally yourself today," Celestia said, sounding a little worried.
"I have no idea where we are going or why, but I can tell it's important," I told her. "I hope I can live up to your trust in me."
"You always live up to my hopes for you," Celestia said warmly, and I relaxed. "I was going to tease you but I feared it would be too much." She sighed, clearly disappointed.
I laughed nervously, then said, "Where are we going?"
"You will learn soon," Ruddy said kindly, even if his name isn't actually very accurate, but neither was Blue Pop. I'm not even sure what 'Pop' is.
"What is Pop?" Spike asked.
"Spike," I said a little chidingly. We had enough trouble with the Captain.
"Captain Blue Pop's name remains a mystery to us," Princess Luna said very seriously. "His parents had a dream and named him that but it remains unclear why he has the name." She shook her head. "Many pony names are appropriate but I always feel bad for those stuck with one that does not fit."
"He could apply to have it changed but he's stubborn," Celestia said, shaking her head.
I had so many questions for Ruddy but was afraid to ask. I didn't want to completely geek out in front of the princesses but he must know so much. Starswirl lived during the Age of Shadows, before the Princesses were born, even before Ponies were enslaved by the Orcs. There are five great Mysteries which he hinted at only enigmatically in his memoirs. This must be one of them!
"I... are we going to the Hollow World?" I asked excitedly. "Or the World Shield?" Mystara is hollow and there is another sun in the middle and lots of ancient civilizations saved from destruction by the Immortals. Starswirl somehow visited the Hollow World; normally, you have to go to the huge openings at the Poles to reach it.
"This is indeed the Fantabulous Elevator of Starswirl the Bearded," Ruddy said solemnly.
"Is it true there's a kingdom of dragons in the Hollow World?" Spike asked excitedly.
That was a great book: Daring Doo and the Hidden Kingdom. I'm not sure how historically accurate it was, though; I only know a little of the Hollow World.
"There is," Celestia said to Spike. "We are not going all the way to the Hollow World, though we could if we chose."
Looking around, I could see no sign of actual controls; Ruddy must control it.
"We are going part of the way to the World Shield," Luna said. "To the Secret Crystal Observatory, built by Starswirl to keep an eye on the Burrowers."
"But aren't they all inside the World Shield, trying to destroy the Hollow World?" I said, frowning. The Entropics released them to wreck havoc there; most of them are currently deep asleep but sometimes they wake and cause trouble.
Celestia looked around, concentrated for a few seconds, then said softly, "Two of them escaped, forcing the Equestrian Plateau and a huge amount of other rock upwards, enabling them to slide through the World Shield and begin to wake here, on the other side. Starswirl discovered them and tried to organize Ponies to keep watch over them."
Ruddy sighed. "But few took it seriously enough, and eventually, he departed for the planes after creating me to run the observatory."
"Tell me he didn't become Keraptis," Spike suddenly said.
Ruddy blinked. "What?"
Luna looked at Spike in confusion and Moondancer said, "Why would you think that?"
"He talks about Celestia like she was his old girlfriend," Spike said, frowning.
"No, I knew him long ago," Celestia said softly. "But that is another story." She looked distant and old and I felt uncomfortable, worried we'd brought up bad memories.
Luna sighed, then said, "No one knows his final fate. Just that he is not dead or if he is, his soul has gone missing. But that's a story for another day too."
My eyes widened. "His soul is missing? I had read that he was thought dead."
"We know things mortals do not," Celestia said. "Do not spread it around. You are all trusted with things that others are not."
Spike looked kind of nervous but I felt very proud. Moondancer nodded solemnly.
We chatted about inconsequential things; Luna and Celestia both seemed worried someone would overhear us and that they'd said too much already, though this thing is warded so strongly, I know that *I* could not scry into or out of it.
"Does that mean...," I began.
"Not yet," Celestia said. "I trust them greatly but we must be sure they do not turn aside from their paths before we tangle them up in things which touch on the affairs of Immortals."
I gulped, and Spike looked very nervous now.
Especially since Moondancer was studying him. I don't know her well, not as much as I should. I was too anti-social then. She is very smart, far more nimble than I am, and she likes to show off her dancing skills. But I don't really know her beyond that.
And knowing she started studying with Celestia and Luna after I left Canterlot.
"I will do my best to be discreet," Spike said. "But why me?"
"You and Twilight's fates are tied," Celestia said. "Further, you will have to handle any special communication on this topic, anyway."
Spike smiled brightly, and I felt good for him, that Celestia trusted him so much.
"You can't tell your coltfriend either," Luna suddenly said.
"He's not my coltfriend," I said. Yet. I've been seeing West Wind, a Pegasus courier who works for Franich House in Darokin. But we can't see each other much, so I don't know if it will go anywhere. But he's a cool guy and I like him.
"I know someone else with a not-boyfriend," Celestia said cheerfully with a naughty grin.
"You shouldn't brag about yourself," Moondancer said, though she was smiling.
Luna said, "You shouldn't lead him on, Celestia," shaking her head.
Celestia's eyes widened slightly. "I suppose I have no room to talk. I am interested, but not sure if I should pursue it." I am not used to hearing Celestia uncertain; it makes me uncomfortable.
"Well, you should make up your mind," Luna said, shaking her head.
"I could say that of you," Celestia said, smiling a little again.
"We are just friends," Luna said firmly.
"Well, I have an actual coltfriend and we know what we're doing," Moondancer said, rolling her eyes. "But I won't tell him."
"I won't tell anyone," Spike mumbled, then sighed.
Sorry, Spike.
"Anyway," Celestia said. "I don't have fluff on me again, do I?"
She did have some fluff on her, I now noticed.
Somehow getting her groomed kept us busy until we reached our destination and stepped out into another room.
******************
Take a gem the size of a very large house and hollow it out; that is what the Crystal Observatory is like; it's a huge soft blue gemstone with other gems set into the main gem, with tunnels and ramps inside it to various levels with some walls carved to be very smooth and project images. The elevator opened into the middle level and we went down a ramp to the lowest level.
Here, Ruddy worked the controls, an array of gemstones forming a rainbow with fourteen colors. A wall lit up with lights and resolved into an array of runes, numbers, and two pictures of huge monsters. One was a giant worm-like creature with purple scales and many teeth in his mouth, which worms don't normally have. The other had a cubical body with a hard shell and long tentacles coming out of two opposing faces and a giant mouth at the base of each set of tentacles. Each was ringed by fancy crystalline apparatus and was inside otherwise solid rock. Readouts which intrigued me but which I didn't understand kept flashing on the screen.
"These are the Burrowers. We perform the daily moon and sun ceremonies to draw power to fuel the engines which keep them asleep," Celestia said. "This is one of Equestria's deepest secrets."
Spike studied them. "They just look like giant monsters." He was not impressed.
"The Burrowers feed on chaos and then feed it back to make more chaos. When they're fully functional, they feed on trouble, then push people's minds to cause more trouble, which gives them more power to work with," Moondancer said a little lecturingly, before I could answer. "I know, I wasn't impressed the first time I came here, either."
I hadn't thought about it but it was clear she already knew about this place. Which made me feel kind of down that she found out first.
Which is why my mark was just added and hers was older.
I guess I have been off in Ponyville, but...
"Before you go, I will show you what must be done for the ceremony," Celestia said. "Since you're operating from Ponyville, you may not need to use that information for a good while, but it's best to let you train in advance."
I wanted to ask her why she hadn't told me before but now I was afraid to find out. Had I done something wrong? But Celestia didn't look disappointed at all.
"So these things were made to destroy the Hollow World?" Spike asked. "They seem kind of small for that."
"Not so much to physically destroy it as to render it chaotic. Four immortals worked together to create it but the Entropics were not invited and this was their revenge, to make something that would destroy their efforts to preserve cultures close to destruction," Luna said. "An entirely petty revenge. Their purpose is to be bringers of war and death and destruction."
Ruddy cocked his head. "Someone is trying to activate the elevator from the Hollow World end."
"Can you handle it or do we need to intervene?" Celestia asked, suddenly very serious.
"I will see," he said and winked out.
"I wouldn't mind riding down while we're here," Spike said hopefully.
"I'd love to see it too," Moondancer confessed.
For just a moment, I was afraid the Cu... Immortality Mark Crusaders had somehow gotten down there. Surely not.
Even if they had tried going to the poles recently.
Which reminds me, I need to finish planning our *adult* polar expedition, since Dash wants to go so urgently. I'm proud of her, but this is going to complicate things.
"You haven't told Marcus about this place, right?" Spike suddenly asked.
"Not yet," Celestia said. "Eventually, he will need to know but not yet."
Spike looked happier than the brightness of the sun.
My brain suddenly put three pieces together. "Did Tirek serve the Burrowers?" He was an ancient centaur warlord who battled Starswirl the Bearded back in the Age of Shadows. He served a mysterious immortal who doesn't show up anywhere else in the records, and the temple was a big stone cube. Rather like that burrower but without the tentacles.
"Yes, and Grogar as well," Celestia said. "And they had an influence on the Orcs who ruled here as well. Many ancient horrors were drawn here by the Burrowers. But now they are too weak and torpid to cause trouble, so long as we keep them so."
Rudy reappeared. "It's a group of Azcans," he said. "I should be able to handle this easily; we get groups like this every so often."
They're the descendants of the humans who lived in this area before Ponies; they got wiped out by a disaster but the Immortals saved them and took them to the Hollow World. However, from what little I know, they seem to have decided the outside world was destroyed and now they sacrifice people to the inner sun for fear it will go out and they will die out.
"Just in case, I will go," Luna said, taking on a human form but with flashing red eyes, fangs, and four extra arms. Each of which carried something for killing people. It was rather disturbing and I jumped back instinctively, while Moondancer stared, eyes wide. "This should scare them off," she said, then disappeared.
That would scare me off if it wasn't really urgent.
Celestia smiled gently at us. "Do not be afraid, my little ponies. Though you are not little any more, Twilight."
Moondancer looked envious but said nothing. I smiled, though it made me nervous. "Everyone treats me differently," I told her. "Not my friends but even people who know me well, seem..." I wasn't sure how to describe it.
"Intimidated. Respectful. A little awe," Spike said.
Celestia sighed. "Yes. Which is why I am glad you have your friends to accompany you. Why I am glad to have my sister back. We all need friends who can see past that. But you must expect more of that."
"Who created these things?" Spike asked.
"Thanatos, the current hierarch of Entropy," Celestia said. "After the War of Lost Memories, he took command of the Sphere and has ruled it ever since." She grimaced, then shook her head and sighed.
Long ago, before ponies or humans or dwarves or any of us who live here now, the Immortals made war and it was such a mess that only a handful survived and even they no longer remember their origins, immortals like Odin, Thanatos, and Ixion. The Elements of Harmony pre-date the war, one of a handful of artifacts to survive from that era.
"Let's show you the rest of the features here," Celestia said and we got the whole tour; even though you're deep inside the plateau here, you can still see the night sky from one of the observatories and look down into the Hollow World as well; we watched Luna chasing Azcans around, shouting about how she drinks souls and eats shadows and they fled, clearly planning to never come back. Spike kept laughing the whole time.
Celestia laughed softly. "Luna's always been good at scaring people."
Like when she was Nightmare Moon, I thought. I suddenly wondered what Nightmare Celestia would be like. Not that I want that ever to happen.
Finally, the Azcans were gone and Luna came back to us, reverting to her normal pony appearance. "Problem resolved."
"Are all the cultures in the Hollow World directly under their original homelands?" Spike asked.
"No, the geography is different and some groups would have to be put on top of others if the Council of the Hollow World did that," Luna said.
"What happens when they run out of space?" I asked. "There's only so much room."
"It hasn't happened yet, but it will," Celestia said, looking thoughtful. "But that will be the Council of the Hollow World's problem, not ours." She frowned, then said, "Anyway, we should return to the surface before people begin to worry and then show you the ceremony in its fullest aspect, Twilight. You will help with the Moon ceremony tonight and the Sun in the morning. Along with Moondancer."
Moondancer now did an elaborate spin on one hoof; I would probably break half my bones if I tried that. "Don't worry, it's easy if you're nimble," she said proudly.
Which I am not.
"Man, I'll go get some healing potions in advance. And bandages," Spike said.
Thanks for the vote of confidence, Spike.
*********************
Moondancer was relentless, never mean or harsh but relentless, pushing me like crazy as I tried to learn the ceremonial dance, which is actually a way for us to channel the magical energies involved in the ceremony. I handled the singing part a lot better because I sing well. But I am a terrible dancer.
It was never all that important before! If I had known... I had always assumed it had to be Celestia and Luna.
How am I going to fit dance classes into my schedule???
Especially when I have all these other new things too.
Then I managed to trip and fall on Spike, who thankfully just laughed.
"Focus," Moondancer said. "If you don't pay attention, you could hurt yourself a lot more than that during the ceremony." This time her voice was harsh.
"I'm not much of a dancer," I confessed.
"I know," Moondancer said. It wasn't harsh but it cut like a knife.
"Are you angry with me?" I asked her.
"No," she said, but I think she's lying. Rarity would probably know why. I don't get it. "Now, let's try it again."
I tripped again! This isn't acceptable! Princess Celestia is relying on me! But the more I tried, the worse I got.
Finally, Moondancer got called away and I got a chance to take a bath and rest.
*****************
It is very kind of Celestia to let me keep my tower for my visits to Canterlot. It's comfortable. So comfortable, I fell asleep on my old bed and Spike... I guess he wandered off or something. He wasn't there when I woke up. Fortunately, I still had time before sunset; it's summer and days are long.
Or I would have slept through it.
There was a note from Spike: 'Went down to Donut Joe's, see you at the ceremony.'
I decided to make some... I don't think I have any food in here. It would go bad, so keeping food here would be a waste. Maybe I could drop by my parent's place.
I teleported to their front door; I have learned, painfully, to never ever teleport into your parent's house when they aren't expecting you.
Mother looked surprised to see me but ushered me in and soon I was having soup with them. It tasted so good; I was really hungry. "This is something Boldavian, right?" The more potatoes and garlic, the more likely it's Boldavian.
"It's a vegetarianized version; we used kufo instead of the beef," Mother said. Father was too busy eating to say anything. "So tell me about this boy you're seeing."
I hadn't said anything about West Wind to her yet; I wasn't sure if it would go anywhere. How did she even know?
"Mothers know, dear," she said, amused.
"Spike visited while you were napping, mentioned him," Father said and Mother looked disappointed.
So I ended up telling them about West Wind and the two dates we've been on. Three if you count the dance. Thankfully, neither of our dates ended in a monster attack.
The one we missed was missed because of a monster attack; a giant clam somehow wandered out of the Everfree. I still don't know how a giant clam got into a *forest*.
And no, it could not have swum up the river.
When I finished that, then Mother asked, "And what's this about twins?"
I had been meaning to tell her but I wanted to bring Dawn Gleaming to see her and she's always so busy. And lives in the Broken Lands, though at least we can send mail via Spike and Spikey. "It's complicated. She's a duplicate of me made by the Moon Dragon."
"I thought the moon was inhabited by cat-people," Father said. "In fact, I'm pretty sure of it."
"The Immortal. It's a long story and I will explain it when I have time but I have to help with the moon raising tonight." Assuming I don't stumble into Luna, causing her to fling the Moon into deep space, where it hits one of the other planets and then the entire Solar system becomes one giant game of billiards!
"Breathe," Father said.
I breathed and relaxed.
Then I had more of the soup, which soothed me.
"You really need to keep in touch more," Mother said chidingly. "It's not like you can't send us letters."
I'm just always so busy. "I'm sorry," I said to her. "I'd better get going so I'm not late to the ceremony."
"Good luck," Father said to me.
"Keep in touch," Mother said firmly.
I should send my brother a letter too; I'm not even sure where he's stationed now.
I am a bad sister.
So I headed out for the ceremony, feeling rather down.
****************
The good news is that I did not fling either of Mystara's moons out of its orbit into another planet. The bad news is that I fell down in front of everyone, causing panic, though Luna quickly settled everything.
"Few unicorns can pull anything that nimble off," Luna told me afterwards as we walked together; Moondancer had gone off with Celestia, who was kinder to me than I deserved. "It helps if you can do that but I don't expect you to start with it, especially since you will likely have a lot of time to practice before anything happens where you have to step in. Dance takes as much study as academic matters," she said, sounding rueful.
"You were completely graceful," I said, embarrassed.
"Due to centuries of practice and being an Immortal," Luna said. "I had a hard time at the start. And your singing was very good."
It's hard for me to imagine Luna and Celestia having a hard time at anything.
"Oh, I was your age once," Luna said. "I was far too impatient and tended to rush everything and get myself in trouble. And Celly had physical grace and I was so awkward." She shook her head. "Your friend Rarity reminds me of Celestia in her youth in many ways."
"Really? Rarity would be flattered."
"It's why I can't tell her," Luna said as we reached her chambers. "Her head would swell up."
We sat down and had some tea; it's easy for unicorns to be graceful at this. "Rarity is very graceful. And more physical than you'd think. I mean, better at such things."
"Her father is military, I'm sure he wanted her to be able to defend herself," Luna said. "Father did his best to teach us to be strong, but Celestia was better at it than I was. I was more interested in knowledge, like you."
I could see the many books on the shelves on one wall of the parlor; I've ready about a quarter of them. Some of them are really old and crumbling. "I can't even... imagine Celestia hitting someone, though I'm sure she must have." Maybe imagine it a little but she's so peaceful. Impish sometimes, but peaceful.
Luna carefully squeezed lemon into her tea. "Oh, I hit people more than she did, but she was better at it. I had a temper and she didn't. And I could not *stand* to see ponies treated badly." Her voice heated up. "Even when it wasn't wise to leap in. When things aren't urgent, I am a better thinker, but Celestia keeps her head better than I do."
"I have never seen her actually angry," I told Luna, then sipped my wonderful black tea. It's from Prance, I believe.
"It's a terrible thing. The wrath of any Immortal is a terrible thing to behold but the wrath of the peaceful mare is worst of all."
Fluttershy, I thought.
We now sipped tea quietly for a minute, and then she said to me, "I am the last person to tell anyone to be patient, but don't feel bad about tonight. You will have plenty of time to learn and it's not necessary to be as fancy as Moondancer can be."
"But I could tell it helped her work the energies so precisely," I said, feeling embarrassed.
"Everyone must find their own way; her magic works through enhancing her body; it's an unusual talent for a unicorn. You have more power than her for other magic but you could likely spend forever trying to catch up to her talent and never make it. It's easy to drive yourself crazy that way," Luna said. "Trying to beat someone at their own game can make you crazy." Her eyes looked far away and sad and now I felt bad for making her feel bad.
"She isn't happy with me but she won't even say why," I confessed to Luna, hoping she knew. "Surely it's not because I skipped her birthday party."
"She is not that petty or we would not trust her with our secrets," Luna said. Now she sipped her tea thoughtfully. "Whatever it may be, she has not said anything about you in my presence that sticks in my mind. And didn't seem bothered the last time you were in Canterlot. She may just be having a few bad days."
"Maybe it's because I was late and she had to wait for me at the station," I said. "I am *so* sorry about that."
"Well, you should talk to her about it," Luna said. "I can only guess and Celestia is better at this sort of thing than I." She shook her head, smiling ruefully. "Which I spent a lot of time envying. But I have come to learn to focus on my strengths and not worry that that others outdo me in other things."
The fireplace roared up and suddenly spat out a letter. Luna grimaced at the fireplace.
"Ooh, Spike must have learned a new trick," I said.
"It isn't Spike, it's Mother," Luna said, drawing the letter over and eyeing it like a snake as it floated before her, suffused by dark blue energy.
I studied it carefully. "No sign of traps," I told her. Not magical ones, anyway.
Luna sighed deeply. "I should probably just burn this."
I can imagine having Loki as your mother isn't easy.
"From my knowledge of your mother, I think burning it would cause her to do something like sneak in and paint the message on the wall of your throne room, adding a coda in which she asks you if you will ever give her grandchildren." Or something more embarrassing.
Luna buried her face in her forehooves. "I know. I know."
"Does she know?" I asked, then decided to take it private, casting a mind-talk spell. 'About the observatory and the burrowers?'
'Mother knows about the burrowers for sure, probably about the elevator and probably the observatory,' Luna told me. Out loud, she said, "I will read now," and began doing so while I drank tea.
'What if she takes the Crusaders there?' I asked Luna.
Luna dropped the letter and buried her face in her forehooves again. Then she shook her head and picked up the letter with her magic again. 'Let us pray not.' She turned the letter sideways, studying something on it. "How is that even possible?"
"What is it?" I asked.
"Nothing," she said quickly, then ate the letter to my shock. "A little paper helps with digestion," she said quickly, then guzzled tea.
I stared with no idea what to do.
"Moondancer often likes to dance at night," Luna said, then paused. "As you probably already know. If you go to the gardens, you might be able to get to the bottom of this while I go dunk my head."
I started to speak, stopped myself, then said, "If you see Spike, can you tell him to make sure not to stay up too late?" I'm not even sure where he is. "As we'll need to be up for the sunrise."
"Of course," Luna said.
I headed out to find Moondancer, while wondering why Luna has to go dunk her head.
And why did she turn the letter sideways?
***************
I was musing on seventh century Ochelean cyphers, which could involve rotating the page; the hango form of the script has some characters which change meaning when turned a quarter or ninety degrees because they resemble other characters when you do that.
Among many problems with their writing system, though admittedly, with hango, it's much harder to put down the wrong word, except through oddities like that.
I tried inventing my own writing system once but I could never get it to meet all my goals.
Anyway, I was musing on this so hard, I nearly walked into Moondancer, who leaped over me and spun in the air to land facing me. "Watch where you're going!" she said, then sighed. "Hello, Twilight."
"Hello, Moondancer. I know a great place to get a donut. Want to go?"
She stared at me in surprise, then said softly, "Sure."
We headed out to Donut Joe's.
**************
"I don't know, my parents just named me that," Donut Joe said to Moondancer. I couldn't believe she'd never been here; Spike and I came here whenever we wanted baked goods in the old days.
"Okay," Moondancer said, then got three pink glazed donuts and a cup of coffee. I got three plain cake with cinnamon and one glazed with sprinkles. And a cup of black tea.
I know, it's not 'plain' if it has cinnamon on it. I didn't invent donut terminology.
"Look, I can tell you're not happy with me and I don't know what I did, and I'd like to make it up to you," I told Moondancer.
"I'm not angry with you," Moondancer insisted, then munched on one of her pink glazed donuts. "Wow, these are better than my usual place."
"Spike and I used to come here all the time." I told her. "You don't seem happy with me. I didn't mean to offend you, whatever I did."
She studied me over another donut, then drank coffee while I sipped my tea through a straw.
"You really are different," she said softly.
"From what?" I asked, confused, then had more of my glazed donut. Then I tried to get the sugar off my lips.
"I've never actually seen you try to apologize before, even if you're a little clumsy at it," she said, then drank more coffee. Is she just not going to sleep tonight?
"I apologize whenever I am wrong," I told her, offended.
"Yes, but you could never admit it before," she said. "You were rather rude to everyone all the time. Which made everyone uncomfortable."
I sighed and hung my head. "I'm sorry. I didn't understand the value of friendship then."
"And..." She frowned, then drank more coffee. "Even just looking at those burrowers makes me crankier than usual."
Was I crankier? I don't know. I didn't feel cranky, I think. "They just intrigued me, while making me worry but I think we shouldn't talk about them, right?"
Her eyes widened and she looked around; no one was paying any attention to us. "And I hate waiting for people."
"That was all my fault," I told her.
Then we chatted about people we knew at school and what they were doing... which she knew all about and I didn't. I'd completely blown a chance to make a lot of friends then. And she didn't.
But now I have lots of friends too. Though I wasn't sure how close Moondancer was to any of them. But surely she had some friends as close as I do, if she had so many friends at school.
I also got her to show me some simpler moves for the morning, then headed back to the castle with her; I needed sleep even if she apparently planned to never sleep again with how much coffee she drank.
All's well that ends well, right?
****************
Except it wasn't over. Spike was home, asleep but he smelled of sugar and milk and hadn't even washed his mouth and two more young dragons were crashed out on the floor by his bed. I don't even know them.
The good thing was a letter from West Wind on my bed with sticky dragon fingerprints on it. I don't know how he found Spike to give it to deliver, but I quickly found it was a request to dine with him for breakfast. I hope Celestia won't mind if I either go eat with him or invite him.
The other was that when I was busy washing my face so I wouldn't go to bed with sugar on it, *unlike Spike*, I could see a red coated, firey maned mare the same size as Celestia in the mirror behind me.
I spun and found Cunning Thought had invaded my bathroom. I bowed; it is unwise to be disrespectful to any Immortal, entropy or not. "Good evening, your highness," I said to her.
"Hello, my rather large pony," she said with an exact mimicry of Celestia's tone. "So you've been down to see the poor lads on ice."
It took me a few seconds to figure out what on Mystara she meant, given the lack of ice down there. "I can neither confirm nor deny that," I told her carefully. "Would you like some tea that won't stop you from sleeping?"
For a moment, she cocked her head, studied me, then said, "Yes."
So I made more black tea. I love the taste anyway. She breathed in the steam, then sipped her tea. "No snacks?"
"I'm not stocked up here," I told her and she looked so sad that I felt guilty.
I never expected Cunning Thought to be able to look so sad.
"More MILK," Spike shouted, then suddenly rolled over in his bed, still asleep.
"I could ask the chefs to make something." If they're even awake.
Cunning Thought concentrated and a plate of lettuce wraps appeared. "It's okay, I will do my part for this little party."
Taking food from Cunning Thought is not wise but I couldn't be rude, so I hesitated.
"They're good," she said and took one, munching on it. Just to be polite.
"RUBIES," Spike now shouted.
He is going to be such a mess in the morning; I shouldn't have just let him run loose but I was distracted.
"Poor little dear, he's going to be incoherent all of tomorrow," Cunning Thought said sadly.
"So what brings you here?" I asked her.
"Well, since you will be part of our family soon, I wanted to get to know my new granddaughter," she said cheerfully.
"I'm not being literally adopted," I said weakly.
"We Pony Immortals must stick together," she said cheerfully. How can someone of the Sphere of Entropy be so relentlessly cheery?
"I already have a mother," I said weakly.
"Who will die soon and you will go on without her forever," Cunning Thought said. "Those friends you rely on, even Spike. You will outlive them all."
She must not know about the plan for all of us. So I won't say anything. "If I did not become immortal, I would lose them anyway," I told her. "But this way, I will never forget them, whereas if I died, I would forget them."
"And West Wind?" she said lightly.
How does she even know?
"We both know the score," I told her. "I can't just never look at a stallion again." Though it does worry me. It's likely why Celestia and Luna have never married. And it worries me about Big Macintosh and Celestia.
Even if it goes perfectly, eventually he will die.
But I guess she's had that happen before.
I finished my lettuce wrap and drank more tea.
Spike belched loudly.
He won't be the only one sleeping badly if this keeps up.
"Have you ever been with a stallion or just looked?" she said curiously.
I stared, mouth open wide. How could she ask that???
"Ahh, no, I thought not but it wasn't impossible you and Celestia's boytoy had done something in times past," she said as if this was something to talk about so cheerfully.
"It wouldn't be any of your business if we did," I said firmly. "I really should be getting to bed; I have to help raise the sun in the morning."
"Help draw power for Celestia's secret project, yes," Cunning Thought said. "You know why she picked you to be her apprentice, right?"
Here comes some lie meant to drive a wedge between us, no doubt. "I make the best sandwiches," I told her.
"Be..." She paused. "What?"
"There was a cooking contest, and I won," I told her. "It wasn't easy, either." I now launched into a long, rambling lie about the contest. Spike continued to babble in his sleep.
"You really are tired," she said. "You reminded her of Luna. She needed a sister-substitute. Of course, now she has the real thing." She made a hoof gesture. "I was rather disappointed to lose her from our team but she did rather get herself in trouble with her first plot." Cunning Thought sighed. "I had to pull a few strings to keep her out of even more trouble. And of course, when her punishment is finally up... she goes and does the same thing, then switches sides. It's not easy being a mother."
I thought about my mother and felt guilty. "No, I suppose it isn't. But I don't know if I will ever know."
"You should talk to Luna; she had children; they're all long dead, though they have descendants. She and the first Blueblood were a cute couple, until he died," Cunning Thought said, then stretched.
"So Blueblood really was Celestia's nephew," I said softly. I'd never really tracked his full ancestry. Too many projects, not enough time.
"Yes," Cunning Thought said. "I warned her but she wouldn't listen. Children never listen until it's too late." She shook her head. "Be careful who you love; you will lose them even if their love never falters."
"Did you love Celestia's father?" I asked softly, both curious and trying to get a dig back at her. Petty, I know. And dangerous with an immortal.
"We had a difficult relationship but I still admire him. Sometimes I hated him and sometimes I loved him," Cunning Thought said, her eyes far away, like Luna's had been earlier. "He got what he wanted and I got what I wanted. His people are free." She sounded satisfied with that. "And they didn't end up in that hellpit, the Hollow World."
"It's not a hellpit," I said chidingly. "It's a place to save and preserve cultures so they won't be destroyed."
"It's a museum but the exhibits are *alive*, forced to spend eternity playing out the same mistakes, never changing, never growing, never *learning*," Cunning Thought said, sounding as bitter as if someone had dropped the Hollow World on her house.
"I know there are scholars there; I've read a few texts by them," I said defensively. "And dropping giant monster worms and other things which cause people to go crazy and murder each other and unleash demons was *not* the best way to change things," I told her hotly. "Do you know how many have suffered because of those things?"
"Do you know how many people have had their hearts torn out by the Azcans when the sun *doesn't need* their hearts? How many slaves will never see freedom because slavery *can never be abolished*? How many Brute-Men will freeze to death this winter because they can't invent fire?" She sounded outraged. "The Hollow World is an abomination against all freedom and ability of any people to govern itself. It makes a mockery of why mortals exist. Tyranny won't unmake itself. Mind you, I'd have chosen something a little more subtle myself but back then, Thanatos wasn't much good at being subtle."
He still isn't, from what I know. Though he is more so than, say, Orcus.
"I think there's a lot of space in between 'this is bad' and 'therefore, let's unleash soul-destroying, mind-twisting monsters'," I said firmly to her. Then I yawned. "Anyway, I am sorry but I really must sleep."
"You can't break an adamantine wall with a pecan cracker," Cunning Thought said. "Goodnight, dear daughter." Then she nuzzled me, looking cheerful as if we both hadn't gotten passionate at each other.
How can she do that?
I nuzzled her back instinctively, then felt embarrassed and she was gone.
"Fire the main cannon!" Spike howled.
I am going to be such a corpse in the morning.
****************
"You're not a human in disguise, right?" Mother asked West Wind at breakfast. I wanted to die, and he stared at her, mouth open wide.
"Umm... why would you even think that?" he asked weakly.
The sun-raising had gone well even if I was exhausted after dealing with Spike, who right now is still in bed, moaning, as far as I know. He wasn't fit to bring with me. Celestia was very understanding that I had to see Mother, though.
"Her last boyfriend was a human," Father said.
"He wasn't my boyfriend!" I told them firmly. I had wanted him to be but it didn't work out. And now he's dating Rarity but that's another story.
"You can't rewrite history, dear," Mother said, shaking her head.
This is probably revenge for when I turned her into a potted plant, which was totally an accident.
"I've rewritten inaccurate texts lots of times," I said stubbornly.
West Wind worked on his breakfast, laughing nervously.
Then we had a twenty minute argument over the history of astronomy. Father looked amused and West Wind ate quietly, and I felt bad for him.
"I'm sorry, you must be bored," I said to him apologetically.
"It's nice to see you so passionate about something you care about," he said warmly and I turned a little red.
"You're not wanted for crimes in six countries like her last boyfriend, right?" Mother asked West Wind skeptically.
"MOTHER!" I shouted, then buried my face in my hooves.
"Your brother never dates international criminals," Mother said chidingly to me.
"We weren't dating and he is not a criminal," I said angrily. Well, I guess by some country's stupid laws he is, but the Thyatians think things like slavery is fine, so I don't care what they think. "He's one of Celestia's agents now and she would not hire someone terrible."
"I'm only wanted in four countries," West Wind said, then laughed, as did Father. Mother eyed him suspiciously.
"That was a joke," I said to her. Why does she have to be so stubborn?
"She's just worried about her only daughter," Father said to West Wind. "I already ran a check on you, so we know you're clean."
He laughed nervously and I prayed this wouldn't mean I would never see him again.
**************
"Your parents are kind of paranoid," he said to me as we were walking after that. He had a meeting but I was going to walk to it with him, then go see Celestia.
I laughed nervously. "I'm sorry. There was a guy and it was messy and now they worry about me. But he's not a bad guy."
"The one who is dating your friend Rarity," he said.
"Yes," I mumbled.
"Well, that's the past and I don't care about the past," he said. "Just the future."
Pegasi are like that, I've noticed. Though Rainbow Dash has been trying to study history more lately. I gave a sigh of relief and he laughed and I frowned at him. "Don't laugh at me," I said.
"Sorry, Twilight. I guess maybe that joke didn't go down well with your parents, though." He sighed. "One of the things you learn in this business is how to diffuse tension with humor but it doesn't always go over well. But then, I'm a courier, not a diplomat. Though I hope to move up to that eventually."
"Good luck," I told him. "Study hard and I'm sure you'll do well."
We'd reached Franich House's base in Canterlot, so he kissed me quickly, then said, "I'll drop you a note next time I'm around! Have fun with the Princess!"
I smiled at him. "I will. Be careful!"
"Not much danger of that," he said cheerfully, then flew to an upper story balcony and went inside.
We may not see each other again for a few weeks, most likely. I couldn't help but think of what Cunning Though had said.
But I don't care. I don't know if this will go anywhere, but it's... I guess it's kind of nice to date someone who understands what it means to be busy. I don't know if this will go anywhere more serious, but we'll see.
It's not like I don't have three million other things to do also.
Like getting to the castle before I am late *again*.
****************
I was intercepted by servants, who dressed me up in fancy clothing; Spike was already in his tux and helped. Then I spent the rest of the morning basically lurking next to Celestia, being introduced to people and trying to remember a million names. While people stared at me in surprise. I had Spike take notes but without pictures it's going to be hard to remember them all; Spike tried sketching them but they ended up stick-ponies.
Celestia and I had a private lunch, by which time I was very tired and somewhat overwhelmed. "Sorry, dear," she said. "But there are lots of people who need to get used to knowing you and who you will need to know, down the road."
"Your mother dropped in on me last night," I told her, then had more of my linguini.
Celestia got wine up her nose, then looked embarrassed. I tried not to laugh too hard. "I didn't even notice," she said, frowning.
"I'm sorry, she didn't do anything bad, just badmouthed people," I said frantically.
"It's okay, dear," she said. "What did she say?"
I told her everything I could remember.
"Man, I slept through the whole thing," Spike said, then yawned loudly.
"You did well, Twilight," Celestia said and I smiled brightly. "I suspect Mother knows more than she's saying." She sighed. "Mother is very good at looking foolish, then coming out the winner anyway. And you will need to keep an eye on Sweetie and her friends."
"Mr. Davenport locked them in a supply closet the other day when they tried taking apart one of his couches because they thought some sort of alien monster was in it," I said, rubbing my forehead. "They're convinced Oards have infiltrated Ponyville."
"It's not impossible," Celestia said. "I doubt we can stop them looking, so you will need to guide them enough so they stay out of trouble without them realizing you're nudging them."
I laughed nervously. "I don't even know how."
"I trust you to figure out some way to channel their energies productively," Celestia said. "I've asked Marcus to do that as well, since he'll be helping to teach the children in Ponyville."
"Did you know I'd fall in love with him?" I asked Celestia softly, afraid of the answer.
"No, I just hoped you would become friends and he'd draw you out of your shell. I was quite happy when you did and sad when he panicked and fled instead of staying," Celestia said to me. "I didn't think either of us would ever see him again. But even Immortals can be surprised. It's important you understand that. We all tend to put up a front of knowing everything and that everything around us is a complicated plan in which everything is under our control. But while I do have a lot of complex plans in play, I am often caught by surprise when people do what I don't expect. And Mother is notorious for her plans blowing up when someone isn't as venial, petty, or nasty as she expected them to be."
"Like when I told her that I became your apprentice by making the best sandwich," I said, feeling a little proud of myself for flummoxing Cunning Thought.
"Spike makes the best sandwiches," Celestia said kindly.
Spike had fallen asleep and did not reply.
"Do I really remind you of Luna?" I blurted out.
"In some ways yes, in other ways no. You don't have her temper or impulsiveness. But both of you are very knowledge-oriented. Luna wanted to learn about everything, to see everything, when she was your age. And she's still better at handling information than I am. I have picked up a lot but I am not a scholar on the level you two are," Celestia said very seriously to me. "When you are my age, you will likely know far more than I know right now."
That's a strange feeling, knowing that. I hope I am as wise as Celestia one day. "I hope I did okay this morning."
"You were fine," Celestia told me. "Other than when you bumped into me."
I buried my face in my hooves.
"It's okay. Start with the basics; no one can jump straight to expertise. It's just like when you learned magic; you had huge power but you still had to start with basic spells. Think of it like that and you'll be fine. It's not likely you'll have to do it on your own any time in the next few years. But it's time for us to start planning for the future. Luna and I won't be here forever. And one day, you'll have to train up successors to watch over Equestria and its secrets too."
Intellectually, I knew eventually the other Immortals would want them to move on from here. Emotionally is another question. "I don't want you to leave," I confessed.
"Sooner or later, Immortals must move on to higher things," Celestia said. "I love Equestria but I can't stay here forever." She sighed. "All things end in time. But we must enjoy them while they last without clinging to them so hard we can't let go." She looked thoughtful and then munched on her pasta.
We ate quietly for a while, then Spike groggily woke up and resumed eating. "Am I underwater?" he mumbled.
Celestia playfully splashed him with a little of her water and he began to flail. "I'm drowning!"
"Spike, you're just a mess from eating too much sugar again," I told him. I don't know why dragons get affected like this. It's *not* in the books. You'd think someone would have noticed before now! "No sugar for you at all today."
"Oh man," he grumbled, then dug into his food.
"Anyway, you should go back to Ponyville, as I'm sure you have work there," Celestia said. "I will likely summon you again in a few weeks for another ceremony. You might ask Rarity to help you practice the moves; she is a very graceful pony."
Scootaloo is a good dancer and she's helped in the ceremony...
The realization I am thinking of asking Scootaloo for help on something important is somewhat stunning.
But she needs a distraction, right? She'll *love* this.
Though I know she's training with Ivan when she's not working for her aunt; her family sends her to help Carrot Top a lot, I know.
I know because she won't stop complaining about it.
"I will. And Scootaloo, since she's done it too." I paused. "I'm worried for them, with your mother having taken an interest in them."
"So am I," Celestia said. "But I must put this problem in your hooves. There is too much to do here." She sounded apologetic.
"It's okay," I told her. "You can trust in me."
"I always do," she said.
I smiled brightly. "One last thing..." I touched her mind. 'I know the Burrowers are a secret but is there some kind of code name for them we can use in public?'
'The Bringers of War,' Celestia said. 'If they awaken, it will be because of strife and they will bring war and chaos in their wake. Let us pray they remain asleep.'
I don't want war to come to Equestria either.
But I'll be ready if it does.
The last thing we need is another age of the like of Tirek and Grogar and their ilk.
One day Celestia will leave...
But I'll worry about that some other time; it's likely to be far in the future. But it's probably going to eat at me all day.
*****************
I forgot about it sooner than I thought, mainly because by dinner time I was back in Ponyville, covered in wet, sticky hay, and rolling down a hill screaming as the Crusaders and Big Mac chased me, apologizing and trying to save me, while I tried and failed to be able to concentrate enough to teleport out.
I begin to see why Applejack is wary of my efforts to help her improve her farm.
But I *test* extensively, then go large-scale, whereas I see Applebloom goes straight to the big model.
I will lecture her later, when I'm not likely to end up at Doctor Belle's clinic.
Fortunately, landing in the East River caused the hay bale to come apart and I just swam to shore, then shook myself off on the Crusaders. It's lecture time.
But I enjoy lectures, so maybe this wasn't so bad. All's well that ends well, right?
I have a feeling it's going to be an exciting fall soon. But first, we have to go to the North Pole before it gets too cold for it. But that's an adventure for another day. My next adventure... a nice warm bath. I am sticky all over despite falling in the river.
Now I'm curious why it didn't wash off.
I really don't need another project.
I wrote Celestia a letter about it when I got home, then went off to go take a bath and relax. I think I've earned it.
THE END |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Short Story 2: 2000% Cooler | "Twiiiilight," I said to her as I came into the library, my saddlebags bulging with books I'd been consulting.
Yes, books.
I feel like I've been possessed or something but these are half really interesting.
And half making me crazy.
"Hey, Dash, done already?" she said, surprised.
"I have questions," I told her, busting out three of the books and quickly paging to my bookmarks. I've bought a ton of them because flipping pages with hooves isn't easy. I normally don't want Unicorn magic but I can see why Unicorns read so much... it's got to be easier for them.
I could see Spike and Dinky shelving books; I didn't know Dinky was working here. Good for her. Unicorns get lazy easily.
Also, it means Spike isn't moping 24-7 like he had been. I hate it when people mope.
The books sat on the table, open to two maps of Blackmoor and a map of the current polar region with Blackmoorian landmarks printed in red over the black current terrain. Anyone with a keen eye like mine could, in fact, see that the three maps all presented *different versions of Blackmoor's terrain*. Nevermind that I'm still trying to figure out where in Blackmoor the place we need to visit is; I can't even figure out which Blackmoor to look in!
And Dawn Gleaming sent me a letter via Spikey indicating that she couldn't find any useful maps inside the research facility. I am trying to go through the memory globes, but they're full of references to *other* places. I could tell you where all of Dr. Birei's children lived, where his son died... but they never are kind enough to say where *they* are. Other than near a town named Kozioko, which of course is *not on the maps*.
"What's the... oh dear," Twilight said. "These maps don't match each other." She frowned at them as if frowning at them would somehow *fix* them.
"Yes, that's the problem. And they didn't mark the town closest to the place, Kozioko!," I said, feeling frustrated.
"Are you sure it's near Kozioko?" she asked me. "Maybe there's a translation problem."
"I am really good at this now," I told her. I think she's a little jealous I can understand Ancient Blackmoorian better than her. Admittedly, only using my Element of Harmony. And it gives me a headache if I do it for long. But I've pored over the globes for all the clues they can give me.
She sighed. "There's never enough time to know everything and just when you think you'd never need it, you need it."
"Isn't there some ritual you could use?" I told her, now feeling sorry for her; she just looked so mopey.
"Too expensive to keep using over and over," Twilight said, frowning. She studied the books carefully. "I believe this overlay map is based on the most recent scholarship; Archmagister Molay is a leader in Blackmoor scholarship; he teaches at the Great School of Magic in Glantri; he's kin to the Aendyrs, I think."
That didn't mean much to me beyond, "So you think he'd know."
"Yes," she said. "Hmm, we do know something. They had to be far enough away from any major Utherite reactor to avoid just blowing up when it all detonated." She quickly made a copy of the map and began drawing circles.
That eliminated half the country. "Further, if it's in this region, it's now destroyed." She pointed to the central hole which now leads down into the Hollow World. "Some of the globes show outdoor shots. Maybe we can narrow down the local terrain from that enough to eliminate more of this."
"Cast the Walk on Clouds spell and I'll carry you up to my place and we can look," I told her. I have the spheres because I can understand them the easiest.
Twilight cast the spell on herself, then clambered onto my back, so I could carry her up to my house. We were soon airborne and Twilight was smiling.
"You look happy," I told her. Not that it's *bad*, I mean.
"Getting to do a research project with you makes me happy," Twilight said. "And seeing you work so hard makes me happy too."
"I work hard all the time!" I told her; I am not a Rarity but I'm not socially blind either.
She giggled and I grumbled the rest of the way up.
*******************
2000% Cooler
By John Biles
Part of the Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring canon.
*******************
Twilight stared at my spare room which I'd converted into viewing globe central station. There was a table with the viewer in the middle, and boxes of the globes everywhere. It was the messiest room in the house, if you didn't know my organizing method. "This is chaos," she said.
I ruffled her mane. "*This* is chaos. I know exactly where everything is according to my organization plan," I told her, feeling proud.
"Which is?" she asked curiously.
"I work through the box under the table; once I have viewed them all, I move the box to the left of the table and get a box right of the table and view it," I said proudly. "That way I don't forget which ones I've viewed."
"And?" she asked.
"And what?" I asked her.
She facehoofed. "I should have brought Spike. We're going to have to organize this."
"It is organized," I said. I do not want to spend hours sorting through these to put them in alphabetical order... how could put these things in more order than this, anyway?
******************
"Next time, get Spike," I said as we both laid on the floor, exhausted from sorting them by date. And making quick notes on the topic of each one. The sun was down and I was starving and too hungry and tired to get up and get food.
If this is how I die, I am going to be really mad.
The good news was that we had everything sorted and it would speed things up in the future.
If we have one.
Spike sending a letter about how he was eating over at Applejack's place and how we'd miss it if we didn't hurry did not help at all.
Before we could die, though, Tank, my pet turtle, finally made it back from the kitchen, dropping apples in front of each of us. That gave me enough strength to rise and try to carry Twilight to Applejack's, though we ended up crashing into the barn and being buried in hay until Big Macintosh dug us out.
At that point, I would have likely eaten my way out if he hadn't been handy, though.
****************
AJ was as AJ as ever, laughing at us when we came in with straw on us, though Spike and Big Mac were kind enough to help us get it off. Granny Smith, Applebloom, Dinky, and to my surprise, Scootaloo, were there also for dinner, crowded around the dining room table, which was laden with food.
Fortunately, I like apples, as you pretty much end up with a lot of variations on apples if you eat at AJ's. To my surprise, we also had Ochelean rice and a carrot salad. I don't think AJ actually dislikes carrots, but she and Carrot Top do have a rivalry over whose food is healthier and stuff. "Carrots?" I said.
"I brought it! It's really good," Scootaloo said urgently to me. "I had to work for Aunt Carrot Top all day, and she only pays me in carrots." She sniffed herself. "I even smell like a carrot," she mumbled.
"I'm surprised Dinky wasn't working with you too." I know Carrot Top often takes care of Dinky when Ditzy is working.
"I know! It's not fair!," Scootaloo said, frustrated.
"Twilight's tutoring me and I help her out; Mom can't train me in Magic and neither can the Doctor and Sparkler's off at her school in Canterlot all the time now," Dinky said, looking frustrated herself.
"You're a big help," Spike said to Dinky and now Dinky smiled widely.
I ruffled Scootaloo's mane. "You and me, we're not cut out for libraries."
She smiled brightly and I smiled.
"I know. If you ran the library, it would be divided between books you'd read and books you hadn't and that's all," Twilight said, sounding tired and frustrated.
"I guess that would just put all the books in one pile with Twilight runnin' the place," AJ said, sounding amused.
"I had it under control," I said to Twilight. "You insisted we do all that work." I frowned. I had it! I was handling it!
"Enough fightin'; you're both exhausted. Git some food in you before you starve," AJ said, then started eating.
One advantage of eating at AJ's is that you can just stuff your face. Unlike when I was little. My mother is even more frou-frou than Rarity; she can be hard to deal with. The hideous outfits she made me wear...
Fortunately, she's too busy to visit and so she'll never meet Rarity.
Which would doom me.
"You gonna eat that?" Applebloom asked me, eyeing my fried apples.
"Yes," I said, wolfing it down. That's the flipside... you'd better eat fast so no one else eats it for you.
Dinky and Applebloom and Scootaloo were yammering about Oards. They've been running around trying to find them; I suspect they've been sent on a wild goose chase, but it's funny to watch.
Sweetie still won't explain how she got trapped in Fluttershy's garbage can.
Scootaloo said, "It could be that it's a tunneler, like those stupid rabbits who keep digging under Aunt Carrot Top's crops."
"What, again?" AJ said, frowning.
Then Scootaloo looked at her plate. "Okay, who made off with my carrot salad?"
"You probably ate it and forgot," Applebloom said.
"I couldn't forget eating it that fast," Scootaloo said, frowning.
"In this house, if you look away, the food's gone forever," I told her.
"Hey, we *ask*," AJ said. "It makes sure food doesn't get wasted."
Scootaloo got more salad, but then some of it went missing again while we were all talking. Now Twilight perked up. "Hmm, let me see if I can reveal something invisible."
"Probably your food fell through a crack into another dimension," Dinky said, then carefully studied the plate with some kind of spell.
"There ain't no dimensional cracks in my plates," AJ said, offended. "I paid good money for those."
"Probably Big Mac's fillyfriends snuck in and stole it," Applebloom said.
"I don't have no fillyfriend," he mumbled.
You have *four*. I'd have to date most of the male Wonderbolts to top that.
Then Soarin' would kill me.
I suddenly missed him; he has to work a lot, being a Wonderbolt.
A Wonderbolt.
It's starting to look like I might never be one. But I hardly even have time to nap with all the work I have now. And if I really become Immortal...
Granny studied the plate intently. "Flip 'er over," she said.
"I'll spill food on the floor if I do that," Scootaloo said, looking confused.
Spike lifted it up so Granny could see under it. "Nothing there."
"I's rememberin' one time, back in Wenbly... Wambly...Wistenwoot...," Granny looked more and more frustrated.
"Wendar?" Twilight asked while weaving some kind of spell.
"Yeah, that place. Anyhoot, Steel Grip, he got this hideous thing in his ear from trying to listen to a door and it tried to eat through to his brain," Granny said, shaking her head at the memory.
"I wasn't trying to listen to my plate," Scootaloo said, frowning.
I began laughing at the idea and she glared at me.
"Sorry, Scoots, I wasn't laughing at you, just at the idea of listening to a plate," I told her.
"Did he die?" Applebloom asked tensely.
"Fortunately, he didn't have much of a brain for it to eat," she said. Then she gulped down the rest of her food. "The moral of that story is to never draw to an inside straight."
Applebloom flopped over, Scootaloo laughed, and Dinky said, "Hmm, that would explain a few things." This got more laughter while Dinky looked confused at them laughing.
Twilight finished her spell. "Hmm, traces of shadow magic."
"It waren't me!" Applebloom protested. "I ain't allowed to tamper with nature's way inside the house."
"Zactly," Granny said. "Earth ponies monkeying around with shadow magic ain't natural."
"But I'm good at it," Applebloom mumbled.
"Just keep your experiments at your clubhouse," AJ said to her. She turned to Twilight. "Some shadow monster stole Scootaloo's food?"
"It waren't me!" Applebloom protested.
"Maybe Sweetie or Twist is playing a prank with their cloaks?" Spike speculated.
Twilight cast a spell; there was lingering magic near the window, which we now noticed was open.
Scootaloo rose, leaped out the window and gave chase, though I don't know how she knew which way to go.
Or if she knew.
"It could be the Oard!" Dinky shouted and ran after her. Soon the kids were all running and AJ and Twilight and Spike were running after them.
I made sure to get all the food I needed to refuel before they got back. Man, I eat so much now. Because I'm so big.
****************
"Thanks for helping me with this fence," Big Mac said to me a little later; I was helping him move boards into place to fix the fence. The others hadn't come back yet and it was getting dark. But I assumed Twilight would have Spike mail me if it was a crisis.
"Not many ponies in this town could move these this easy," I said. It's not bragging, just a matter of fact.
"Yeah," he said appreciatively. Is he checking me out? I am sexy but he already has more fillyfriends than is good for someone! But a second later, he was just studying the boards.
I wish Soarin' was here.
"So which one of your harem do you like best?" I teased him.
"I don't have a harem," he grumbled. Then he dragged some more boards and I did the same.
"Are you telling me you don't like any of them?" I said, finding this hard to believe.
"I didn't say that," he said. Then he studied the whole section of smashed up fence. Beyond it was an open field where cattle grazed and beyond that, the East River and beyond that, the Everfree Forest. "We need to add a gate."
"Did they smash the fence because they were too hungry to go round to the gate?" I asked curiously. But it looked smashed in from the field side. "If you do like them, why not date one of them?" If he says 'I want them all', he gets clobbered.
"I dunno if any of them really knows me," he said to the shattered fence sections. "And anyone I marry is gonna have to help run this farm. AJ and Applebloom, I think they're gonna move on, down the line." He sounded sad and I now felt guilty even though I'm not his sister and not leaving him. "Roseluck, Daisy, Lily, they have their own business and farmland and everything. I dunno how we'd make that work out."
They have... I guess flowers do need to be grown and won't just drift out of the sky.
Shut up.
I pay very little attention to those three. Or flowers. Other than eating them.
"And Celestia is, well, Celestia," I said softly.
"Exactly," he said. "I mean, she's so... but she..." He started to get flustered and kick things. Then he was back to normal. "I'm just a normal Earth Pony. I can't even tell if she's just teasing me like she does to Marcus."
I felt like I ought to help him but I am totally the worst person for this.
Not that I can tell him that.
"Well, you're still young," I said lamely. "Though... you are older than AJ, right?"
"Yeah," he said. "Anyway, let's fix this fence."
We had it about half-fixed when everyone joined us. An embarrassed Ivan was with them, being carried in the air by Twilight. "Hey, everyone," I said. "You have fun while we were working hard?" I teased them.
AJ looked like I'd hit her with a ton of bricks, while Applebloom said, "It was a training exercise." She sounded aggravated.
"Man, you all run fast," Ivan said, very tired.
"Well, now you get to help fix the fence," AJ said, aggravated. "Keep your trainin' out of my house."
"What?" I asked.
"Scootaloo needs to become more alert, so she had to catch me making off with her food," Ivan said as Twilight set him down. "Pass me some rope, I'll start tying knots."
Spike began cutting rope segments and Ivan nimbly threaded them in without even needing instructions. I'd nearly tied myself to the first set I had done.
"You cheated with shadow trick stuff!" Scootaloo protested.
"Monsters won't play by rules," Ivan said very seriously to her and she jumped back a step. "Sorry, Applejack. I won't do it again."
"You kids shouldn't be tryin' to find monsters," AJ said sternly to them.
"We have to find the Oard and really, I've seen things that would make your hat fall off. *Forever*," Dinky said, trying to sound spooky. She reared up and waved her hooves around, trying to act like... a ghost, maybe?
"Uh huh," AJ said. "Hey, Dash." She studied my hooves.
Now I studied my hooves. "What's wrong with my hooves?"
"What? No, I mean, thanks for helping with the fence," she said softly.
"It's what friends are for," I told her, smiling and she smiled back, cheering up. "Anyway, you fed me. And Big Mac needed a bodyguard to keep the ladies off him."
"Dash!" he said, shaking his head.
"What broke the fence?" I asked, surveying our work and feeling proud of it.
"Some ogres used it as their target for a rock throwing contest," AJ said, sighing. "From across the river. I guess they're good at throwing." She gestured across the field with a hoof towards the East River.
Man, I hope they never decide to use my house for that. "Did you get rid of them?"
"They won't try that again," AJ said. "Okay, let's get 'er done." We all got down to work again, though it would go faster with more people.
*****************
Afterwards, we made the kids go home or go to bed as appropriate, then all had some of the orange brandy which AJ's... well, we decided to use the word 'twin'. It's simplest. Anyway, Apple Blossom had sent AJ some of her best stuff and we had some and ate these really nice crackers Twilight got in Canterlot which are from some place I've never heard of.
Anyway, they were tasty and that's all that mattered.
Ivan tried to make a dramatic exit and crashed into the wall and just slept on the floor. I ended up crashing at Twilight's, too tired to fly home.
Thankfully, Spike did not moan about Rarity all night this time.
The next morning, I had to go over to Rarity's in order to get fitted for my cold weather gear. Twilight says it's far colder than Equestrian winter there. Given everything freezes over in winter here, I'm guessing that's pretty cold.
"Rarity, I don't need bows on my hood," I told her, standing in her workshop with her and Sweetie doing the fitting. The outfits are actually rather like the Wonderbolt uniforms but with a hood instead of the head part. I expect it's because a Wonderbolt uniform would probably mess up her manestyle.
You know Rarity.
Sweetie was here helping her, now using her magic to move tape measures around and cloth and just showing off. You know how fillies who just got their Cutie Mark are.
I didn't need a fortune reading but I let her do one anyway, because, you know, kids.
"But Dash, daaarling," Rarity said, dragging the word out. "Stallions like it when a woman pretties herself up and you do have a coltfriend now." She pulled a seam around on the outfit, then frowned at it, looking dubious.
I wish Soarin' could go with us but he can't take that much time off. "Given I'm not out to seduce Ivan, Spike, or Marcus, that won't matter," I told her. That being said, I rather like the trailing lightning bolts and the deep blue color with flecks of white, like snow was coming down. "Take the bows off; it's fine otherwise."
She gave me the look, the look that says 'remember the fashion show and those free outfits?' The ones we fucked up by ignoring her advice. I began to sweat. "They're too frilly. They're not *me*," I told her. "This isn't pretty, it's a work uniform."
"Oh, but Rarity's is totally gorgeous," Sweetie said. "And nothing says you can't look good while working!" She touched her pink visor; I don't know why she was wearing one inside Rarity's shop.
I paused, then put on my goggles. Not a problem, whew. I may need them if there's thick snow.
"Hmm, good point," Rarity said. "I'd better make everyone some snow goggles. But the bows, they are totally you. There's one to match each shade of your hair!"
"Which makes my hair less unique," I countered.
"It compliments your hair, darling," she said to me sternly.
She knows this stuff, but I really don't want frilly ribbons. I writhed, caught between hating ribbons and Rarity's proven expertise at these things.
Sweetie shuffled her cards and began dealing, studying them thoughtfully. She laid out a spread, studying it. "I predict you'll regret if you get rid of the ribbons."
She's got to be making it up.
That's the perfect trick to just reinforce whatever you want by claiming divine... magical... whatever sanction.
"See? You'll be glad they were there," Rarity said, gesturing at the ribbons, then the cards.
They planned this.
I sighed. "Fine."
I'd better not end up regretting my generosity in putting up with this!
*****************
I have to finish cracking the secret of where to find that place. I tried using the Element to guide me in throwing darts at a copy of the map but it didn't work. I am drowning in information from the globes, but no one will just say 'Hey, Dash in the future, we live HERE.'
Unfortunately.
So I went flying to clear my head. Also, I had weatherpony duties, anyway; we had to clear away clouds and push them south where they are needed. One of the reasons Ponyville has an unusually large weather crew is that uncontrolled weather blows in from the Everfree all the time. We're getting a bunch of extra clouds.
Once the sky was clear, my head was not. I flew around aimlessly, trying to brainstorm.
Eventually, to my surprise, Fluttershy flew up to join me. "Hey, Dashie, what's wrong?" she asked gently. "You've flown over my house twelve times."
"I don't suppose you know any druid magic for finding towns from two thousand years ago?" I asked her.
"Druids really aren't into towns much," she confessed. "I'm sorry, Dashie. This is about our trip, right?" She looked rather fretful and guilty now.
"Yeah," I told her. "We can't go until Twilight or I figures out where to go." And I want it to be me. I mean, I won't turn her answer down but I feel like this is my quest. I want this. I have to be the leader. And I can't lead if I don't know where I'm going. I gazed down at the landscape aimlessly, looking for clues I knew didn't exist but needed anyway.
"Hmm, maybe if I turn into a penguin, I'll think of something," she said, spiraling down to the ground.
I followed her, though I was dubious. What good would that do?
She waddled around while I tried not to laugh *too* much. She didn't seem to notice, looking intent.
"Hey, any chance you could talk to the building if we went back?" I asked. "Or something alive in it?"
"Nothing would be alive that was alive when the building got moved," Flutterpenguin said, turning to face me; a pink and yellow penguin is just ludicrous looking and I had to fight the urge to laugh. "Did Ivan try asking Asterius?"
"Asterius said it was my task to figure it out," I said, then flopped onto my back, studying the sky. "I'd totally recognize the area if it wasn't frozen under ice. If I was flying over it or standing on it. It's weird, I can see it all in my head from all those globes. I guess I wouldn't recognize everything but if I travelled back in time, then I could get around it, even at night."
"Ahah!" Flutterpenguin said, holding up a flipper. "Do the globes show the night sky?"
"Yes," I said. "But what... oh!" The stars change when you move around the world. One of our flight school classes was basic night navigation but they warned us about that. "So we could line up the stars and figure out where it was!" I sprang to my feet, feeling excited.
A lot of the night sky is different but when I think about it, I remember a few constellations I know but in weird places. "Man, that was really smart, Fluttershy."
"I'm so glad I could help you," she said, smiling brightly and turning back to normal.
Twilight is ga-ga for stars, so I bet she has historical charts and maps and stuff.
"Let's go!" I shouted, and we took off for Twilight's, Fluttershy trailing after me.
*****************
Twilight was really happy that this was the way to do it. We did a lot of moving around maps and consulting books and drawing new maps and then we zeroed in with some checking of the globes. Bingo!
"And since you have time stamps on the globes, we can get it really precisely once we convert to modern timekeeping," Twilight concluded. "And X marks the spot." She tapped a location on the map.
"We can ship out in the morning," I said excitedly.
"Now we can plan out the trip and figure out how to get us all there. My balloon can fly there but it's going to be kind of crowded if we all cram into it for days," Twilight said. "I have some ideas, but I need to plan the trip, we need to get supplies and we have to figure out how to haul everyone without having to practically sleep on top of each other." She ticked off each clause with the same hoof gesture as if she was pointing to a list on paper.
"And how to keep the Crusaders from sneaking on," Fluttershy pointed out.
Given Applebloom can buil... oh oh. "I will handle the vehicle. You get supplies and stuff."
Twilight looked at me curiously.
"It's in the bag," I told her confidently.
***************
"I ain't buildin' another flying vehicle for everyone to take away from me and you can't have our clubhouse," Applebloom said, sitting back on her haunches so she could fold her forelegs in front.
Their clubhouse flies now but they're not allowed to leave town with it.
I'm sure that stops them as much as my mom's rules stopped me, though.
We were in the yard of her home, around one side of it for a privatish talk. One thing you learn, anything you say within a half mile of AJ's house ends up being overheard by an Apple.
"C'mon, we'll bring back frozen shadows for you," I told her, trying to look heroic and trustworthy, which means standing in a pose I saw Daring Doo do on a book cover.
She began to look thoughtful and I hoped I wouldn't regret that.
"I got chores to do," she said, watching me with one eye.
"I'm sure I can talk AJ into letting you out of it so you can build us something big enough for everyone," I told her wheedlingly.
"If AJ says okay. And you owe me some ice that hasn't seen sunlight in at least a thousand years," Applebloom said. "A thousand years," she repeated very earnestly.
"I'm not sure if that exists."
"You'd better *make* it exist," she said, trying to sound tough.
"Fine. Now I'll just go talk AJ into it," I told her.
That's how I got stuck with Applebloom's chores for three days.
But I took it for the team in good grace, since this is really important to me.
*******************
I laid helpless on the floor of my house as Soarin' sat on his haunches near me. "What's a good place for us to eat in town?" he asked.
"Anything as long as I never see an apple again," I moaned.
Ever sorted damaged apples? Did you know there's four different kinds of problems and each has to be dealt with separately?
I bet you don't know and never will, and I envy you with all my heart.
"So how's the cold weather outfit? Does it look good?" he asked.
"I can put it on," I told him, rolling onto my side and trying to muster the will to stand up.
"Sure," he said, sounding a little excited.
I got off my living room floor, went to my bedroom, donned it, returned, *then* remembered the ribbons.
"Oooh, nice," he said, circling me to study it from all sides. "You might want it in all white for camouflage, though." He patted one of the ribbons. "Nice touch."
I guess stallions do go for ribbons. They're still not me... but if Soarin' likes it... But he won't be on the trip.
I hope Rarity and Marcus aren't all mushy the whole time or I will go mad.
"Hmm, I'd say Soup Bowl but it's more a lunch place, really," I said to him, consulting a map of Ponyville in my mind.
"Whatever is good with you," he told me. "I don't know any place around here."
Aaargh, if we go to the fancy place, we'll overpay to starve but it's likely more like what he's used to, I thought. We could try the new Darokin style place but I don't know if they'll be any good... human cuisines are sometimes hard to adapt to what Ponies eat. They tend to rely on meat a lot.
Okay, be bold, I decided. "How about the Darokin-style place? It's new and might be good."
He leaped to stand up. "Sounds good to me!"
I took off the cold weather outfit; it's too hot for normal weather, then we flew off to Summer Feast; I suddenly wondered if they would change names each season.
Not my problem.
******************
It turns out what you get at Summer Feast is fancy breads and lots of fruit and beans. And peanuts and soy. I was pleased with my meal until halfway through it when a swarm of people descended on us, all wanting a piece of *my coltfriend*. It was like those damn parasprites if they wanted Soarin' instead of eating things. We were besieged in our table-cubicle. Booth. Whatever the word is.
"Oh, thank you so much," Lily said, flipping her notepad into her saddlebacks and doing that thing where she kind of sways on her hooves. Like she's sick but it's meant to make her look feminine. "We're so lucky to have a big hero like you here!"
Soarin' laughed nervously and I said, "Shouldn't you be raising your tail for Big Mac right now?" Don't just hit on every guy in sight!
Lily glared at me. "I'm not that kind of girl!"
Soarin' was about to turn back to his pears... they soak them in some kind of sauce and then fry them and they are so good!.. when Colgate slid a pad over his food. "Please sign!" she begged him.
So he got his pencil in his mouth and began signing; we were besieged by a horde. What is wrong with these people? Can't they tell we're on a date? Show some manners!
Oh man, I sound like Rarity.
So I stuffed my face while his food got cold and he tried to appease the hordes. Is this drive Rainbow Dash insane day? Is that it? Maybe this is one of Pinkie's pranks.
Then I saw Bon-Bon coming. She's not even into stallions. Am I cursed? Is this someone's revenge because I am cooler than them?
It must be. As I ate, I began making a list in my head of people less cool than me who might be bitter and seeking revenge, then soon realized it was far too big a list. Maybe if I narrow it down to generally bitter ponies...
"Don't you have a girlfriend?" I said to Bon-Bon as she came up to us, pressing through the horde.
"What?" she said in confusion.
"Line on the left," I mumbled.
"Pinkie asked me to tell you she made a special dessert for you two," Bon-Bon said, studying me with one eye a little wider than the other, shrinking back on her hooves a bit. "When I was dropping off a load of my latest products."
"Oh. I'm sorry," I said, burying my face in my hooves. "As you can see, even men are lining up to waste my coltfriend's time."
"It's okay," Soarin' said softly to me. "I get this all the time, it's part of my job."
It would annoy me less if anyone wanted my autograph, but apparently saving Equestria doesn't count for anything around here.
I finished my food and eventually the storm of fans ended and Soarin' quickly stuffed himself. We paid up and fled to Sugarcube Corner.
***********
There were no fans in Sugarcube Corner, just Pinkie, the Cakes, and their kids. Who were trying to get into the oven while their parents tried to stop them.
"I have made my finest non-lethal pie *ever*, just for you two," Pinkie said proudly.
Rainbow colored icing covered the usual tan colored pie crust with Soarin's cutie mark in one corner. Soarin' sniffed the air over it and made a happy noise. "I can't place the smell."
"It's a rainbow pie! Zap apples combined with one fruit for each color of the rainbow," Pinkie said proudly. "It even has gold at the end of the rainbow!" She pointed to...
"Pinkie, we can't eat gold coins," I told her, now that I saw them.
"Edible gold foil from Bon-Bon surrounding chocolate coins!," Pinkie said proudly.
Mr. Cake began to laugh. We all stared at him; he mumbled something, then tried to get his son out of the oven.
I don't get it. Maybe being a parent warps your mind.
It would explain Mom.
Anyway, Pinkie chopped the pie in half and we wolfed it down; Soarin' ended up with the chocolate coins but gave me one; the edible gold foil tasted like lemon, by the way.
Now I wonder if all gold tastes like that.
There was a sudden uncloaking and we were surrounded by Crusaders with Dinky wearing a monocle and doing something magical and the rest trying to pin Soarin' down. "Hey!" I said. "What are you doing?"
"Making sure it's not an Oard infiltrator," Scootaloo said. "Sorry, Dash, we have to be sure you're safe."
Soarin' buried his face in his hooves and I said, "You know him! I trust him and he's not a time-travelling monster!"
"It could be anywhere," Twist said sagely, trying to look old and wise, which doesn't work when you have a bit of a lisp and big glasses and you're still at that totally awkward phase of growing up.
"We have to be sure," Applebloom said, waggling a hoof at me, in a manner far too reminiscent of my Mom.
"I'm sorry," Sweetie said apologetically. "Let me sing you a romantic song!"
To my surprise, she launched into the Pegasus ballad of South Wind and North Wind and how they could only meet once a year and made the most of that day. We danced together despite his messy mouth and mine and Mrs. Cake tried to dance with her husband, then had to chase the kids deeper into the house. Pinkie accompanied with her one-pony band and the rest of the Crusaders were dancing around.
I felt better after that, kissing Soarin' messily and feeling this more romantic than anything else we'd done.
Thanks, Crusaders.
But never accuse my coltfriend of being a monster again!
*****************
Unfortunately, a little after that, he had to head back to Canterlot. I mean, I... umm... ahahaha.
I generally sleep on my own, anyway, so no big deal.
I could see lights on at Rarity's.
Having a coltfriend who doesn't have to be gone all the time must be nice for her.
Even if Marcus probably runs away screaming every so often for no reason.
I buzzed the house and heard him yelp inside; this made me feel better, so I flew home and got some sleep. Lots of work tomorrow.
I wish Soarin' was here, though.
And that his fans would have left us alone!
****************
I awoke to the sound of someone eating breakfast in my kitchen. Given I live alone, this was not good news.
So I slipped out of bed, got a broom, and slipped up to peek in my kitchen. It was that idiot, Rainbow Crash, my not-exactly-evil twin. Basically, she's me if I was a *total loser*.
I know, it's probably very hard for you to imagine a version of me that isn't the coolest person in Equestria, but she's it.
Not only is she a loser, she was *eating my oats*. I need my fruit and oatmeal in the morning to keep me powered up for my work! And my training! And it's *tasty*. Especially with cinnamon.
"Don't eat my food!" I told her, and she jumped.
"Oh, you're here," she said, sounding surprised. "Dawn Gleaming told me to send you some books since Twilight Sparkle was too sad and stupid to find them herself." She pointed a hoof to the corner where books spilled out of a bag. "I flew all night, so I gotta fill up before I take a nap. Where were you?"
"On my bed," I told her, then decided to get new locks. And maybe have Twilight mount a fool-zapping wand turret. "Did you just wander around my house???"
"Oh, you were under that pile of sheets on your bed?" she said, surprised. "No wonder you're such a mess." Then she ate more of MY food.
"You sound like Mom," I told her and now she winced and grimaced. I still need to tell Mom about her but if I do, she'll try to put us in matching dresses and yell at me for not writing more often.
I grabbed the barrel of oats and began making breakfast. "Don't just barge into my house when I'm asleep; if I'd heard you, I would have whipped your ass on instinct."
She began laughing at me, so we had to tussle, rolling around whaling on each other on the kitchen floor, wings beating wildly; unfortunately, this tipped our breakfasts onto us, as well as the cinnamon, turning us into a giant living floor of oatmeal with cinnamon and strawberries; we were a filthy, sticky mess.
"Look what you've done," I said accusingly.
"Look what *you* did," she glowered back and then we wrestled some more.
Finally, we gave up and tried having a shower, but we were still both a disaster and that wasn't going to do.
This left us only one choice.
******************
"What's this?" Crash asked as she followed me creeping up an alley towards the back door of a building.
"It's a spa; they can clean anything but it's not very cool to be seen, so we have to sneak in," I told her. It's far too girly-girly; my Mom loves spas.
She nodded in total agreement and followed me as we crept between it and the hardware store. I went up the wall with her on watch, then she followed after me as I poked the window open. We'd just slip through the office and then into the front room with no one the wiser.
In fact, it went off without a hitch, and soon we were finally getting the deep scrubbing we really needed. I had not realized oatmeal could get so deep into your wingfeathers until today.
So, of course, who shows up at the spa when we're trying to be covert? Rarity and Fluttershy, of course.
"Why, darling, it's so good to see you both here," Rarity said. "Surprising but good."
I winced and winced again when Crash winced with me, which set her off and for a while we both winced in alternation, until Fluttershy said, "Are you okay, Dashie?" She sounded worried.
"I am totally fine and don't need anything, I'll just be moving on, see you later!" Crash said, and started to take off, but Rarity stopped her.
"Now, now, there's no rush; they're still working on you," Rarity said. "You can't fly with... my goodness, what happened to you?"
"It looks like they had a fight in a strawberry patch," Fluttershy said. She studied Crash. "Probably brought down from the plateau, though someone cut them up."
"We were attacked by a huge pony-eating strawberry and defeated it only at the cost of becoming a mess," Rainbow Crash said, shivering as one of the spa ponies worked her over.
The other was doing me, or had been, as she now rushed over to get Rarity and Fluttershy started. "The hooficures here are a miracle," Rarity said, making a happy noise as pink-haired Lotus Blossom worked on her; her sister Aloe was busy trying to get Rainbow Crash clean.
I think that's their names; I don't see them much.
"I'll be with you in just a minute," Aloe said to me.
"It's okay," I told her. The soon Crash is clean, the sooner she's out of here and I don't have to put up with her.
"You never told us you had a twin, Dash," Aloe said to Rainbow Crash.
"I'm Rainbow Dash, she's Rainbow Crash," I told Aloe.
Rainbow Crash grumbled. Losers don't get to take my name, sister, I thought.
Rarity paused, then asked hesitantly, "Are the others in town?"
"Just me, running some books to Dash here, since she's decided to become an egghead," Crash said dismissively. "Really boring looking."
"They're not boring! Those people need to be remembered!" I said urgently. "And I am *not* an egghead."
"You'd need a very large egg," Fluttershy said thoughtfully.
Is *Fluttershy* mocking me? Surely not. She was just lying on a bed, waiting for her hooficure, with mangos or whatever those things are on her face. Kumquats? Cucumber, maybe?
Rainbow Crash laughed so hard that Aloe accidentally got hit in the face by her side. Crash didn't notice, and Aloe just adjusted her stance and kept on scrubbing. "NERD!"
"I am not a nerd! This is important!," I said angrily.
"Now, now, Crash, it's good to see Dash improving her mind," Rarity said, waggling a leg at Crash. "You shouldn't mock her for it."
I stuck my tongue out at Crash. She stuck hers out and we bristled at each other.
"You break it, you buy it," Lotus Blossom said, then returned to filing hooves.
Dammit.
Fluttershy started to say something, then shut her mouth, opened it, then shut it again. Crash eyed her like she might suddenly breathe fire. It suddenly struck me that she and Dragonfly probably aren't good friends like the two of us are. Though really, they're all clones and their pasts only exist in their heads.
Also, Dragonfly is kind of crazy.
And dangerous.
Aloe finished off Crash and began working on me, shaking her head and humming as she worked. I wiggled; it kind of tickled as she scrubbed me.
"You should take a nice mud bath," Rarity told me.
"Just going to get a regular one, then I fly home," Rainbow Crash said. "You're paying for this, right, Dash?"
"Me? You're the one who got us filthy," I told her.
"I will cover you both, since I expect you forgot to bring any money anyway," Rarity said, pulling money out of her saddlebags with her magic. "And you should come here more often; a lady must look her best."
"I'm... okay, I am female," Crash muttered.
I laughed. "Thanks, Rarity." As in fact, I had totally forgotten to bring any money.
I would have gunked up my saddlebags if I'd worn them, anyway.
"Glad to help a friend," Rarity said, then made happy noises.
I managed to escape without a complete makeover and then Crash and I got an actual breakfast at a cafe. Once we'd eaten, I told her "Try not to get yourself eaten on the way home."
"Ain't nothin' fast enough to catch me," she said dismissively, rising from the table and stretching her wings; we were at an outside table.
Scootaloo now came into sight, pulling a small flying wagon full of carrots down... over... the street. She didn't look too happy until she saw us, and then she waved, so we waved back. Working for her aunt again, I see.
"Hey Dash, Crash, good to see you!" she said cheerfully. "Is something big about to happen?" She hovered over the cafe, looking proud of herself flying.
"I'm about to remind Dash I'm faster than her," Crash said, smirking.
"As if," I said. "She brought me some... stuff." The last thing I need is Scootaloo calling me an egghead.
"See you later! I have to go take these to Filthy Rich," Scootaloo said. And she flew off.
Good kid.
Crash watched her go with an odd expression, then sighed.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing," she said and took to the air. "I'm off. Good luck on your trip."
"You too," I said softly, wondering what that had been all about.
Then she soared off at high speed.
Not as fast as me, though. I headed home to finish my... studies.
*****************
Days passed; we accumulated supplies, figured out our route, and generally got ready for the trip; I could feel the end of the summer coming in a way I haven't felt since I was in school. One of the weirdest things about being an adult is that summer doesn't matter so much. I work the same amount all year long.
But we have to make our trip before the fall, since Marcus and I are both going to be committed to teaching.
Me, a teacher. I feel like I'm on the wrong planet.
I'm going to help coach the pegasi too. That'll be fun.
But teaching... I can't believe I committed to teach a history class.
There's too much we've forgotten. I hope I can get across how I feel about it. I thought history was boring but now, I understand. It's all about life and life is only boring if you're boring.
And I'm never boring.
By the time we were ready to leave, I felt somewhat frazzled. Fortunately, I would have a chance to rest on the trip. Applebloom had built us something Pinkie says is called a 'Zeppelin'. It's basically a gigantic balloon full of magical gases with a house hung under it by ropes. You can blow it with wind or tug it with ropes or Twilight or Rarity can sit in this big chair and it runs off their magic if you can't get the right wind. Of course with Fluttershy and I... with me... that won't be a problem.
Dragonfly is kind of nuts but she's a better weather pony than Fluttershy, I have to admit. Still, I'd rather have Fluttershy on my team.
"Who decorated my room?" Rarity wailed as we began packing everything onto our zeppelin. I could hear her deep inside the zeppelin.
"Sweetie Belle worked really hard on your room," Applebloom said, sounding aggravated. "Because she loves you."
"I'm sorry, I thought you'd like it!" Sweetie wailed.
As I hauled in my stuff on a small wagon, I wondered if they'd gotten Scootaloo to decorate my room.
It turned out to be covered with crude drawings of myself and the Wonderbolts. At least, I think it was me, as I rather resembled a rainbow-colored dog in some of the drawings. Paintings, technically.
*Technically*. But if a newborn foal can out-paint you, you don't really get to call it painting, in my opinion. However, it did have a nice bowl / petbed for my cool turtle, Tank, so I set him down there to nap.
There was no sign of Scoots, though, to my surprise.
As I unpacked my stuff, I heard Scootaloo telling Twilight how to pilot. She sounded very jealous; I'll have to cheer her up. They were somewhere upfront but sound seems to carry inside this thing, I noticed.
I stashed everything; I noticed the bookshelf and was grateful; it let me stash all my reference works. And I still have to finish going over several sources Dawn Gleaming sent me. Thankfully, she scribbled notes all over them and the half that aren't about how awesome she is were very useful.
Twilight had a meltdown about writing on books the one time I showed her, so I won't mention the other ones.
I'm grateful for a bunch of books. I paused in the hallway to feel confused, then Fluttershy found me. She was smiling brightly. "My room has a little tree for Slither to perch in!"
"You brought your snake?" I said, surprised.
"I had to leave Angel in charge of making sure all my little friends get fed," she said. "Slither gets confused and tries to eat some of them if I give him that duty." She sighed. "He's a good boy but, well, he is a snake."
Funny that.
"I am really excited," I told her.
"I'm excited for you," she said, smiling broadly. "Come, look!"
Her room was decorated with beautiful pictures of various animals including a painting of her and Angel having a picnic. It also had lots of potted plants, a birdcage with a canary and a very nice dresser drawers.
And a bed, tucked into the corner.
Who the hell did her room, while I got stick-people???
"I have to thank Dinky; she decorated my room," Fluttershy said. "I hope your room is this beautiful."
It's a trainwreck.
Distantly, Rarity and Sweetie were wailing at each other, while Applebloom chewed out Rarity. I could hear Marcus trying to speak and being trampled on. Verbally, that is.
"Oh dear, I had better go clear that up," Fluttershy said.
Not getting near Rarity wailing. I decided to go see Twilight and Scoots. They were up in the captain's room up front.
The captain's area was at the front of the Zeppelin; there were all sorts of mystical machine things which I didn't know what they did and a huge pair of windows so you can see where you're going. The Captain's chair was flanked by two smaller chairs, painted red and blue respectively. They didn't seem to have any higher purpose than sitting.
"Hi, Dash," Twilight said, smiling. She was perched in the chair, a big mass of purple wood with stars on it; the chair was well made but ugly and I felt a little better. It had padding on the seat proper and I got an odd feeling from it.
"Hey, Dash," Scoots said, smiling but with less enthusiasm than I was used to getting from her. Too much enthusiasm most of the time, really. It's not wise to idolize other people.
Even if they are as awesome as I am.
Which is why I always liked the Wonderbolts; they're the only people as awesome as me. Or they were; my friends can be pretty awesome too.
She's probably trying to play it cool, so I ruffled her mane. "Hi, Scoots, Twilight. So this is some kind of magic piloting chair?"
"Yeah, you have to be a unicorn or me to fly it," Scootaloo said, sounding proud.
Twilight said, "Because of her cutie mark, you see." She pointed to Scoot's pilot-wheel cutie mark as if I hadn't been there when she got it.
I had guessed that, given Scoots isn't an alicorn. Which is probably for the best.
"Just don't let Marcus try it; he'll crash the thing or fuck it up some other way," Scootaloo said.
"Scootaloo, don't use language like that," Twilight said chidingly. "Ponies shouldn't swear."
"Dad swears all the time," Scootaloo said stubbornly, getting down in that defiant crouch of hers.
"I'm sure Marcus would do just fine," I told Scootaloo, gesturing vaguely off towards his and Rarity's room. Though Twilight would likely pilot it better if it comes down to using magic to steer. But I gotta stick up for my pal.
"He's an idiot. I think Sweetie wants to marry him or something, won't shut up about Marcus taught me this and Marcus showed me that and blah blah blah," Scootaloo said, now sounding even more sour; her face was all twisted up and bitter.
I began laughing at the image of Sweetie asking Marcus to marry her. Him and Rarity dating is crazy enough without adding a big age difference. Sweetie's too young to date anyone, let alone an adult. But that's not her goal, I'm sure. Sweetie is, well, sweet. She likes everyone.
Otherwise, she and Rarity would have probably killed each other on one of Rarity's bad days.
I remember going over to Rarity's and Sweetie just ran outside and yelled, "Run while you still can!"
I just took off and did not look back.
"Don't mock me!" Scootaloo said angrily and stormed off into the living quarters area of the ship. Zeppelin.
"Dash, you shouldn't laugh at her; I think she's aggravated because we won't take them, even though they made this for us." Twilight sounded guilty. "They're just too young."
"I was laughing at the idea of Sweetie and Marcus dating," I told her. "I guess she could have gotten the wrong idea."
"You should apologize," Twilight said, still sounding guilty and craning around to look out the back door.
"I'll go find her," I told her.
It took some effort but I eventually found Scootaloo pinned under Pinkie, who was trying to get her to listen to a joke. Pinkie's room was, well, pink, with silly pictures on the walls and a nice looking bed with pink sheets. In fact, it was pretty pink pink pinkpinkpink.
Pink.
"Hey, Scoots, I wasn't laughing at you, just near you," I told her.
Before I could finish, she erupted out from under Pinkie, collided with my front half, rolled over me somehow and fled down the hallway, yelling angrily.
I don't get it, I said I wasn't laughing at her!
"Better apologize," Pinkie said to me, rising and shaking dust off herself.
"That *was* an apology!" I told her.
"It didn't work," Pinkie said, shaking her head.
Scootaloo didn't return before we had to leave, though. I'm sure she'll get over it before we get back, right?
******************
This thing is pretty fast, but it means someone's gotta sit in the chair most of the time. And somehow, sitting there doing magic stuff makes you tired, even if you're just sitting on your ass. I guess magic must eventually wipe you out. Rarity, Marcus, and Twilight all pretty much had to go sleep after their shifts.
I stared down at the landscape below. It was a cold swamp, not that you could make out many details at this altitude; hills and mountains rose to the east and I could feel many knots of loyalty down below; I could hardly make out cities and towns with my eyes, but I could feel them by the concentration of my element there.
Twilight was on duty and Pinkie was sitting in the red chair, pretending to help. Or maybe she was, with her bard tricks somehow. I was just standing by the windows, looking out and down.
"We're off past Wendar," I said. "Right?"
"Yes, that's the Swamp of the Beast and the Kingdom of Ghyr, a feudal state mostly home to humans," Twilight said; she gestured and a glowing map appeared in the air of the area.
"It's based on a toyline but someone jammed it into this world because they thought it would be cool," Pinkie said, gesturing with her forehooves, though nothing actually happened.
"What on Mystara are you talking about?" I asked her.
"You're claiming the Immortals jammed this entire region into Mystara, basing it on toys?" Twilight said, sounding dubious. "Oh, wait, you're joking," she said, facehoofing. She laughed a little and I laughed a lot.
As if people would do something like that.
"The Old Ones; the Immortals don't have that kind of power," Pinkie said, shaking her head.
When she starts getting on about the Old Ones, I generally tune out, so I pretty much forgot the next half-hour of our trip.
*****************
"Oh come on, the Heartstone is clearly a toy name," Pinkie said, waving a hoof at Twilight. "And 'Warduke'? Clearly a cheesy name for a villain toy," she continued.
At this point, even my ability to zone out failed and I fled before Twilight could quote some book she probably just made up.
I have to admit I did try checking up on her once, but the book was so boring, I couldn't finish it to find the quote. Then she found me and I had to lie about why I was looking at it and she made me read it all.
I never did see the quote.
So I went to see Fluttershy. Who was hiding under her bed. This didn't work well since she is too big, which meant the bed was resting on her back and tilting up, which can't feel very good. "Fluttershy, what are you doing?" I asked.
Slither was sleeping in his 'tree'. I think. Sometimes he'll sit still for hours and I think he's dead.
You couldn't hear Twilight and Pinkie arguing. Thank Celestia for that.
"It's too quiet," she said to me, looking around furtively.
"I thought you liked quiet," I told her.
"So did I, but it's never this quiet, unless something bad is going to happen; there's always Angel moving around and Slither and my chickens and visitors and...," Fluttershy paused and looked embarrassed. "I guess it's not likely there's a predator on board."
You'd think the *druid* would know that.
"It's just thick walls and windows you can't open," I told her. "Blocking the noise." I gestured at the windows.
She looked embarrassed and curled up, hiding her head.
I gave up and went to find someone else to hang out with.
******************
Applejack was drunk and half-asleep and surrounded by playing cards. Ivan was asleep in the middle of the cards on the floor. Spike was asleep with his head in a tub of ice cream, so I pulled him out of it and put the ice cream away. By this point, I half-expected to find Rarity and Marcus dressing up as ducks or something.
Has everyone gone mad? Is that why no one ever went back? There wasn't anything about insanity in the books! I tried to plan ahe...
I sound like Twilight. I'm going crazy too!
I decided to go see Rarity, hoping she wasn't insane yet. Or Marcus.
Or at the least, they wouldn't argue over whatever exactly Pinkie and Twilight are arguing over.
Or hide under the bed.
Or be wasted.
Man, they didn't even invite me to drink with them!
I hope Luna doesn't get jealous and turn Applejack into a bottle of brandy and drink her.
I tried to get the image to go away and I couldn't, so I went to Rarity and Marcus' room. I hesitated at the door, unsure if they might be doing something naughty; I couldn't hear them but the walls are thick on this thing.
Distantly, I heard Pinkie say, "Norwold did *not* always exist! It too was..."
I would never find out; I did not *want* to find out what she was going to say. I ran into the room as quick as I could.
Marcus was fast asleep on the bed, while she tried to make adjustments to a fancy outfit she was wearing, all red and black satin and lace and gems. With a hugely brimmed triple-layered hat. With a tiny train which went around the third level.
I would rather die than wear that outfit.
"Oh Dash, darling, can you help me? Marcus is still clonked out from his shift," Rarity said, then yawned. "And I just got up."
I really don't want to.
But I am bored out of my skull.
And I really don't want to have to listen to Twilight and Pinkie debating whether I used to be a pink pony with green hair who liked to eat watermelon or something.
Probably everyone has that nightmare.
If it is just me, don't tell me.
So I got trapped listening to Marcus snore and helping Rarity to make dresses. This is a terrible fate.
Rarity perked up a lot and was very chatty, though most it was her rambling on about things I don't care about and people I don't know or know only dimly.
Finally, though, she said, "Darling, it's okay if you talk too." She sounded a little guilty.
"I think everyone's going a little stir crazy," I told her as I tried to hold two pieces of cloth together with my hooves; Ponies can make things stick to their hooves but it's very clumsy. They never lined up right and I had to keep trying and it was stupidly hard and embarrassing.
"I'm getting a lot of work done but sitting in that chair is terribly boring," Rarity said wearily. "And tiring. And working all by myself all the time isn't much fun. I'm used to having visitors and clients. It's okay when I'm inspired but I wasn't meant to be alone."
"I know, I'm totally cooped up. I want to go out and fly," I told Rarity, shuffling impatiently on my hooves.
She adjusted her work glasses and studied me. "Any reason you shouldn't?" she said. "We're over lands you've never flown over, right?"
Well, I do have the cold outfit. "Can you help me get into my cold outfit?"
"Of course, darling," she said. "I just wish you'd let me fancy yours up."
"No thanks," I said quickly.
We got me suited up and I took off, feeling silly I hadn't done this before.
*****************
I can say this. Whatever Pinkie thinks, the inhabitants of Ghyr don't look like toys *at all*. They were perfectly ordinary people, though it did look like an explosion in a jeweler's shop, sometimes.
They did stare at me a lot and I didn't see any of our kind of Ponies to my surprise. Just ordinary horses and ponies. Who are always a little creepy to us. Like humans and monkeys; they're just enough like us to give you that weird feeling.
I made sure to keep an eye on our ship; if I got lost here, I wouldn't know how to get back to Equestria. They've probably never heard of us. I'd never heard of Ghyr.
I finally flew down to a very surprised looking human who was busy with some others harvesting wheat. "You're not a giant toy, right?" I asked him.
He stared at me, mouth open wide, his bushy moustache quivering.
"A bit of a fool but not a toy," another man said as he reaped wheat with a scythe. "I've never seen a real pegasus before," the other man said; he was tall and strong with short black hair. "I didn't know pegasi could talk."
How could he know we exist and not know we could talk? "A friend of mine thinks you're all toys or something," I said, pointing at the zeppelin, then felt embarrassed. "Anyway, sorry to bother you."
They clearly had not noticed the zeppelin, and now they stared at it in surprise.
"Hah! That'll show Pinkie for being silly. Anyway, nice to meet you!" I told them and took off back towards the ship.
I'm sure they'll be telling stories about this strange encounter with the coolest pegasus they ever met for a long time.
And maybe I can get Pinkie to stop being silly.
I was starting to rise upwards when I saw a little orange-haired girl running through the field, jumping up and down, trying to get my attention. Curious, I turned and flew down to her, hovering over a bush full of... tasty strawberries! They smelled so good but I could tell farmers were growing them so I couldn't just eat them.
But I wanted to.
"My doggie fell down the well, can you fly down and save him?" she asked me. I could feel her loyalty to her pet. Smell it. I don't know how to describe it but I couldn't let her loyalty to her pet go unrewarded. And this would be better than going back to the ship so I could watch everyone slowly go stir-crazy.
"Hah! Show me the well," I said proudly. "I'm the awesome Rainbow Dash and I'll have your doggie out in no time. What's your name, kid?"
"Lani," she said, bowing to Rainbow Dash. "Let's go!"
I followed her across several fields, through a grove, around a village, into some woods. They were dark and dangerous looking. Not dangerous to me, but little human girls are another question. One day she might be half as awesome as me, but right now, she was one percent at best. Two percent if she can cook well.
If she cooks like Sweetie, down to one half of one percent.
And I expect Sweetie could have rescued the dog herself.
Then the wolves began howling; I could hear a crackle of thunder and the little girl jumped, her pigtails flailing. "Don't leave me," she wailed.
"I won't abandon you," I said seriously to her, and she jumped again, then stared.
"But you just met me," she said softly, looking surprised.
"It's just wolves," I said. "I can whip entire packs. For one thing, I fly." I looked at her and landed. "Here, you can ride me," I told her.
This took some effort; I'm rather large now, bigger than my boyfriend, and she was rather small. Too old for a diaper but probably not old enough to entirely dress herself without help. Even with hands. "Just hold on tight," I told her.
Fortunately, she had a broad skirt so she didn't have to ride side-saddle. Hey, I have a saddle! I got it out and we put it on quickly, then she mounted again, while the wolves howled and thunder kept crackling despite the lack of clouds in the sky; clouds were starting to gather, but nothing to worry about.
"You're not a toy, right?" I asked her.
She froze up. "Why do you think that?" she said, stunned.
"Oh, Pinkie thinks everyone in this country is toys because, well, Pinkie," I told her. "Not that you know Pinkie."
We kept going through the woods past a crumbled farm house which had odd black scorchmarks on it and... bones. I grimaced. "Maybe I'd better take you home."
"My poor doggie, we have to save him," she wailed.
"Okay," I told her. "You're being very brave." Kids eat that stuff up when you tell them that. They want to be adults before they're half as cool as me, then they get in trouble.
Few things are more horrible than realizing you just said something your mother would say. But I guess I'm not a kid any more even if I'm not a mother.
I sped up, though I couldn't go too fast or she got confused and we got lost. I could see flashes of ground-level lightning.
Timberwolves. They're made out of wood and they produce lightning.
Do not ask me how, it's magic.
I think they produce lightning.
Or are they summoned by lightning?
If you listen to Granny Smith for too long, your brain wanders and you begin to hallucinate.
If you rub wood together... no, that's fire. It's wool you rub to make sparks. But Timberwolves don't have any fur, so they would have to make fire.
I could smell smoke and see distant glows of flickering firelight and then I heard a lot of wolves howl in agony and race past us, burning and burning and burning. They were made of timber and quite fearsome, except for their terror. I suddenly felt bad for them and wondered how the species survives if it catches fire all the time.
The thunder had stopped and now Lani was staring with her mouth open wide at the burning Timberwolves. I couldn't blame her, I was staring too.
"Don't worry, we'll get to the well while they're distracted," I told her.
"I think they're running to the well," she mumbled.
We reached a clearing; the well was kind of narrow with a wooden frame now on fire; the bucket had fallen in and the well was jammed with now trapped timberwolves, some of whom were still burning.
This was like a too much pizza dream. I felt a little bloated and nauseous just thinking about it. Lina just couldn't stop staring, eyes wide. I covered them. "Don't watch," I told her. This bothered me and I'm an adult and I know those things would eat us if they could. "Don't worry, you're safe with me here," I told her confidently.
I flew high and stomped a cloud to make it rain, putting out the wolves; I could hear a dog whining piteously deep down. But how to get the wolves out?
I set Lani down on a tree branch, then got some rope and began crudely lassoing them and pulling them out; they fled once out of the well, then I flew down and got the little black dog; he latched onto my left foreleg, trying to eat it but my cold weather outfit stopped his fangs to his frustration.
He was like a little baby wolf himself but with actual flesh and fur and not on fire. Not very friendly.
Lani pried him loose. "I'm sorry, he likes to bite hands," she said. As soon as she took him, he went from being hostile to be all happy and cuddly and licking Lani's cheek as she smiled at him.
"I don't have any," I pointed out, waving a hoof.
He strained in her arms, trying to lunge at my hoof, and she said, "It's why he's so frustrated." She hugged him tightly. "Fenny is a good boy," she sing-songed.
Fenny gave up on me and began licking one of her hands. While he did that, she gently touched my necklace. "Is it magical?"
"It's an Element of Harmony," I told her. "The Element of Loyalty." I could feel her loyalty to her pet.
"What a pretty gemstone," she said, studying the lightning bolt. "It's magic, right? Like the Heartstone?"
"Yes," I told her. I only vaguely know about the Heartstone but you should never admit ignorance to a kid. "I'd better get you back to your parents."
"Parents?... oh, *my* parents!" she said, first confused, then understanding. She must be shook up. Poor kid. But I'd best get back before I get chewed out.
Finding her house took forever but as the sun began to set, I got her home to her snug little home. Her father didn't even come to the door but her mother did, wearing a red dress and began chewing her out.
"She just wanted to save her dog," I said in her defense. "Pets shouldn't be abandoned." It's why I brought Tank with me on this trip, since he can... I should have brought him with me! He must be stir crazy too! "Wouldn't you go wandering out late if she got lost?"
Her mother stared at me, then said, "What on Mystara are you?" She stepped back warily.
"I'm Rainbow Dash, the coolest pegasus in Equestria," I told her. "Or the world, really."
"And the most modest," Lani's mother said dryly. "I haven't really... you could have some hay if you want."
So I had some hay and Lani got me some strawberries. I went up in the sky and...
And I realized I couldn't see my friends at all and they've probably... no, they didn't send me a fire message. Though Spike is basically drunk and unconscious. Too much ice cream but it's the same thing for him.
But I know the way they were going. I think.
So I took off after them.
**********************
No letter from Twilight chewing me out. That was good.
But I was stuck in heavy cold rain and lightning and they apparently hadn't noticed their weatherpony wasn't with them to send me a letter. Given this could mean they're totally off course and too busy arguing over whether the Ghyrians are *toys* to notice, this was a bad sign.
Given toys have no feelings and Lani did, I can now disprove Pinkie's theory. Hah! So much for... okay, not brains, given Twilight, the smart one, agrees with me.
It has to show I'm better than something.
Though right now, I don't seem very good at finding them, which worries me.
I dodged lightning bolts and hailstones and was glad for my cold weather outfit as it is really cold up here. Even for my kind. Should it really be this cold? It's not even really fall yet!
Though Twilight and my reading did say it gets colder as you go North.
Assuming I am going North and not to the Moon or something. Though I would run out of air if I punctured the Skyshield.
I *could* puncture it and fly into space.
But having no air would cramp my style.
The storm got worse, and I nearly got hit by lightning. It outraced its own thunder but I spotted it in time, thankfully. The goggles Keraptis gave me were really, really helpful in this weather. They magically stayed dry and that's a huge help as otherwise the water drops distort your sight by something or another Twilight would understand. Or Marcus. Then they'd lecture about it to show how smart they are.
I totally have no idea where I'm going and I'd be glad for any of them who could point me the right way. This storm is throwing off my sense of directions; I can't see any landmarks. When I get back, I'm getting a compass sewn into this thing or something.
Or maybe a spell on my goggles. Having a little built-in compass in one corner would be awesome. Maybe with an altitude thing too.
Fantasizing about magical goggle enhancements caused me to take three hailstones to the face and I almost got lightning bolted again. I circled and rose, trying to see if someone was doing this deliberately.
I could feel the cloud rise with me and then I realized the problem. Someone's messing with the weather and making this storm follow me so I can't get out of it.
Well, two can play at that game. "Show yourself! I know you must be there!" I shouted.
Silence. Followed by lightning coming at me sneakily and silently. But I could feel the build up, so I dodged like a falling avalanche.
Okay, that's not a good metaphor. Rarity's good at metaphors.
But she'd be screaming about her running makeup and panicking in this.
I got me into this, I will get me out.
I should have stayed on the ship.
But if I hadn't, probably those crazy burning wolves would have eaten her and her dog.
I had to do it. Had to. Probably my Element inspired me to.
Yeah.
Hail battered me but I swept it away and began pummeling the clouds, trying to drain them off so they would collapse. Someone was reinforcing them but I couldn't see them. "Show yourself!" And where was he getting the water for it?
Or she. Could be a woman.
But it feels like a guy.
I hope I didn't anger Thor by being more awesome than he is or something.
I think he's the immortal of lightning. I kind of slept through Humanics.
As did most of my classmates.
I mean, how often do you run into humans in most of Equestria?
Now I regret it.
I'm regretting sleeping in class; I am getting old.
Fluttershy would know. And probably get him to have a tea party.
But I think I am going to have to kick Thor's ass. "Dammit, Thor, jealousy is petty! It's not like this will somehow make you as cool as me! I just rescued a puppy, what have you done lately?"
That sounded more awesome in my head.
Then another cloud spat lightning at me but I spiraled around it, trying to get to the source.
The source was more lightning and I got knocked for a loop, tumbling down. But I recovered, then dodged another bolt. Now my suit had char marks.
I need this suit!
Okay, I have to think. I'm no egghead, but I'm not an idiot either, like some people.
Could it be a lightning elemental? The best way to take them out is to disperse the clouds.
Like I was doing before. I began working my way through the clouds, dodging bolts and slowly clearing open spaces; a few clouds tried to reform but I kicked their ass. I'm not the best weatherpony in Equestria for nothing.
Unfortunately, my suit was going to need repair and I was horribly frazzled and the lightning kept coming. I had the feeling I must be missing something obvious.
Lightning jumps between positive and negative points, it makes thunder...
The lightning is silent.
It's a TRICK.
I closed my eyes and reached out with my special sense. That the Element of Loyalty gives me. I couldn't trust my eyes; someone's put a spell on me or something. But I could feel my friends... I had been flying away from them, lured and driven by the bolts.
But now I knew. But why no sound? Wouldn't an illusionist know to do that? I had to be missing something.
But the lack of lightning hitting me as I flew blindly towards my distant friends convinced me that whatever I had missed, it wasn't kicking my ass. I win again, as always.
I finally reached the ship, opened my eyes and the storm was gone. Some punk had put a spell on me.
Probably jealous I can fly and they can't. Hopefully, everyone isn't worried but I can tell them about my heroic deed. It'll be cool.
**********************
"I didn't mean they were literally toys! They're *based* on toys," Pinkie said stubbornly.
Twilight buried her face in her hooves.
"How do you even know this?" I asked her, hooves crossed. I had come in and found them *still* arguing over this topic. Somehow.
"Hold on," Pinkie said, whipping out paper and drawing on it; it was a decently designed ad for toys based on humans. Leaving aside no one would want that... okay, I guess humans might want such toys.
"Pinkie, advertisements you drew yourself are not proof," Twilight said and I had to agree.
"I can see it. With my element," Pinkie said stubbornly.
"Yes, but that means it's a joke, right?" I said hesitantly.
Pinkie galloped off, looking frustrated and Twilight flopped over onto one of the armrests of the chair.
I suddenly wondered why Applebloom had put armrests on it and the other two chairs when only Marcus has actual 'arms'. They're not well positioned to help a pony. Maybe she copied a book design or something?
"I can't focus enough to read, I am totally bored," Twilight confessed.
Maybe I shouldn't rub my freedom in her face. Or maybe it'll cheer her up. I decided to tell her the story of my adventure.
"Dash, you shouldn't run off on your own." Twilight sighed and looked like my Mom when I tracked water into the house. Even though our house was a cloud. Made of water.
"Everyone else couldn't leave or was sleeping or drunk or stuff," I told her. "There's way too much boring waiting in this adventure so far, so I *had* to go be cool."
She studied me. "It sounds like you were right but there's no traces of magic left behind." She frowned. "I'll try and do a scrying while I'm waiting." Her eyes glazed for a moment. "Now your suit is a mess; get Rarity to fix it," Twilight said. "I'm going to sit here pilot and try to find out who did that to you. If it was a spell." She looked very intent.
I decided to get my suit fixed, take a nap and maybe everyone would be calmer later.
******************
"I will make this the most beautiful thing you have *ever* seen," Rarity said eagerly, studying my damaged outfit.
"It just needs darning," I said. I think that's the right word.
"Nonsense. I do nothing without doing right, darling," Rarity said. "You should go rest, you look exhausted."
"I am not tired," I told her.
Marcus chose this moment to snore. He sounded terrible.
Rarity didn't seem to notice. "Go rest, I will make this lovely."
I can't fix it myself; Pegasi aren't nimble with their hooves and my leg strength won't help.
Time to go have a nightcap and go to bed. I hope it still fits; I haven't worn it since last winter.
****************
My nightcap kept my head nice and warm and I slept really well, though I woke to nightmare visions of Rarity having turned my cold weather gear into a clown costume.
It's not that I hate or fear clowns but I do not want to look like one.
I stuffed my face in a bag of oats to avoid having to find out yet but I soon ran out of excuses. Applejack wandered by looking like she'd been kicked by a mule. "Partied too hard?" I asked.
"Yes," she mumbled. "I should be home getting ready for the harvest."
"We'll be back in time," I told her. "You didn't have to come."
"I had to come," she said, suddenly looking less a mess. "You're my friend and I know how important this is to you."
I know it makes her uncomfortable to think about what we found at that old lab. Luna is studying it now, I think. "Thanks," I told her.
"I just ain't got nothin' useful to do and I can't even catch up on chores," Applejack said, then sighed. "We need somethin' to do."
"We can put on a show!" Pinkie said enthusiastically, suddenly appearing next to us. "I'll dance, Dash can sing and Applejack can play the jugs!"
"Do what?" I asked. That sounded vaguely obscene to me.
"You know," Pinkie said, producing some of Applejack's empty cider jugs and blowing across the top to make horn noises.
Heck, why not? I *need* something to do. "Here, let me do it," I said and manipulated the airflow with my wings, making beautiful, deep music.
Why Pinkie was making an odd face at me, I don't know. My playing was *awesome*. Most Pegasi instruments involve manipulating air flow.
"I can't sing worth a roll of hay," Applejack said, frowning.
"Come on, it'll be fun," I told her.
"Umm, Dashie..." Pinkie began.
"It will be great!"
Jamming out while Applejack sang and Pinkie danced was pretty awesome. Applejack actually has a really good voice but it struck me that she sounds just like Apple Blossom when she sings. Applejack's evil twin, not her sister Applebloom. She sounds like a Manehattanite lady, not a country girl.
"Did you study singing at your fancy school in Manehattan?" I asked.
She crumpled up and hid her face. "Yes."
"You sound great," I told her.
"That was great, Applejack!" Pinkie said. "You're much b... you were really good." She laughed nervously.
"Don't make fun of me. I don't sound like me," Applejack said mournfully. "When I sing."
"You sounded like you the last time I heard you sing, though you weren't as good as this," I said, then imitated someone singing badly. "Anyway, let's try it again; I keep getting ahead of Pinkie."
"You need to follow the beat," she said weakly.
"I am good at beating," I said, beating my wings. Hah!
Pinkie paused and laughed. "Ooh, I walked into that one! Yeah!"
Only Pinkie would celebrate being the straight woman for a joke.
Then I laughed; I'd nearly forgotten to, which was silly enough I laughed more. Then I realized Applejack was cringing. "Come on, you're tougher than that."
"You sing beautifully. Won't you sing a song with me?" Pinkie said pleadingly.
"Only if Dash can stay on the beat," Applejack said, peeking with one eye at Pinkie.
Man, why is she so embarrassed? She's a great singer. "Come on, Applejack. You scared of a song?"
"I am not scared of a song!" Applejack said angrily.
"Then show me!"
"I'll learn ya!" Applejack said, accent so thick you could cut a cake with it.
Or a hunk of wood. As cake slicing really isn't very hard.
Pinkie showed me the tune and I got going on it.
o/~ This is the story of the pebble who changed the world!
Say what?
Applejack was soon laughing her way through a silly song about a pebble rolling downhill and how it caused someone to trip, so they had to go to the doctor and they fell in love with the doctor, so they bought extra roses and the rose-seller now could afford a new house and... it just escalates from there.
When we got to the end, Pinkie said, "I got you to sing that song so we could sing this," and then we launched into the same tune but with totally different words, a love ballad about a soldier and his fair mare. They were parted by war and it was utterly tragic. By the end of it, Rarity had come in without us noticing and was bawling. Applejack was crying too, then saw Rarity and clearly wanted to die.
So I covered for her as a good friend should. "Hey, Rarity, is my outfit updated?"
"Yes, darling. I came to find you so we can try it on you," Rarity said.
Please, don't let it be all frilly and lacy now.
****************
I barely recognized it; it was a mass of lace and frills and pieces of satin and it now was eight different colors and half of them were shades of purple. I could see a few bits and pieces of the original fabric but this didn't even look like it would hold off the cold. Also, it now had a hat which was bigger than my head and had my name on it in diamonds. Which glowed with a soft inner light.
I stared. I couldn't even complain because I had forgotten how to talk. It was that bad.
"So, you like it?" Rarity said hopefully.
"I can't wear that! Everyone in the universe would mock me!" I said in horror.
Then she threw it aside and started laughing.
I stared at her.
"I'm sorry, darling, I was so bored, I took the bits I had to cut off your suit and made this out of scraps I had."
"..." I stared, mouth open wide.
Then she used her magic to pull over the real suit from next to the bed. It now had a cape with a hood; it was a nice red with RD on it in green. Otherwise, it was the same as before, just fixed. "This will keep your mane dry, darling," she said. "And make your entrances more dramatic."
"Oh man, you really got me," I said ruefully, then put it on; it fit perfectly. Even if Rarity tries a thousand percent to girly-girly me, it always fits perfectly.
"This is a work outfit; it has to be practical," Rarity said, clearly regretting that. "I will dress you up pretty later."
"Where's Marcus?" I asked.
"Piloting," she said, then sighed. "Next time you scout, I may take on a human form so I can go with you. I am dreadfully bored."
"That would be cool," I told her. "But why would you need to go human?" I cocked my head curiously.
"Because a human can ride a pony easier than another pony can," Rarity said. "Next time you want to scout, let me know."
"See, that's kind of weird. Why would one species be better suited to ride another than its own kind doing so?" I said. I mean, I know humans are jointed differently but it seems like ponies end up carrying ponies enough it would be useful to be better at it.
"Ponies don't normally need to ride someone and Pegasi normally put passengers in a wagon but we have nothing to make a wagon with." She sighed. "Next time, we should make a chariot or two so you and Fluttershy can fly people around."
Wait... I bet those humans who modified us wanted to be able to ride on us. Though we're normally too small for adult humans without magic.
And really, normal animal horses are... I guess it's just a coincidence, though if I mention this around Pinkie, she'll start claiming all humans are toys for pony children or something.
If we were much wider, though, humans couldn't ride us any more than they ride elephants. But I am glad I am not wider.
I decided to go check with Twilight about the spell.
****************
"What makes no sense to me is why no sound. If you're going to try to fool a Pegasus with weather, you would have to know they would notice," Twilight said, frowning. Marcus was in the command chair, powering the zeppelin, while Twilight was on the floor with a half-dozen books, two maps and several charts of arcane symbols.
"I know. Unless someone was just testing me," I said.
"Some Ghyr wizard may have hoped to get a Pegasus for his collection," Marcus said.
Spike now walked in with more books. "You could feel the power of it, right? That kind of electrical sense of pegasi?"
"Yeah," I told him. It's part of our weather sense that lets us accurately manipulate clouds. Normally, it's only useful for sensing lightning in a storm.
"Maybe he could only do so many senses and he had to give up sound to make it feel right," Spike said. "Affecting a pegasus' weather sense isn't a standard illusion trick, is it?
Twilight looked embarrassed, then said, "You know, Spike, that makes good sense. Most of the time, illusions don't cover the less well known senses, other than nociception, and maybe heat or cold sensing. And they usually miss species-specific tricks like that unless designed to fool them."
"Than what?" I asked.
"Pain. Nociception is pain," Twilight said. Marcus grunted. "Anyway, we still don't know motive, but now we know why. Trying to manipulate the spell to work on your Pegasus senses made him lose one of the regular ones," she said, making a note. "My efforts to scry who did it keeps giving me an image of giants picking their noses and other giant things and generally not looking smart enough to pull that off." She frowned.
"Someone's blocking you," Marcus said. "They must be very powerful. I'm trying to keep an eye out for magic near us."
This seemed to involve him grunting a lot.
"Anyway, you can work on material for the class you're going to teach," Twilight said. "While we work on this." She gestured at her huge spread of eggheady stuff.
That probably wouldn't hurt. "Could it be Thor? He's likely jealous I am cooler than him."
Having Twilight and Marcus give me the exact same look is disturbing. More so when it clearly indicates thinking I am an idiot. I felt like I was back home with my parents. "Not Thor's style. He'd just hit you with a hammer," Marcus said.
"It could be Loki," Spike said. "This is more his style."
"Isn't he Celestia's mother or something?" I said. I don't know much about the Immortals. I suppose I should learn.
"Yes," Marcus said. "He likes to screw with people when bored and he's usually bored if he's not screwing with someone. But if he was going to mess with any of us, it would be me," Marcus said grimly.
"Sweetie," Twilight said, sighing. "He did come by and 'mess' with me but only with words. But he's got some long-term con going with Sweetie."
Marcus frowned more at that.
"I'll send her a letter," Twilight said and began dictating to Spike.
I suspect he just realizes I'm already cooler than him when I'm not even an Immortal yet. It's only natural he's jealous.
********************
I idly petted Tank as he studied my efforts to write out some lectures. They all end up too long or too short and I really need access to more of the town library.
I winced at that thought. Gilda would probably mock me for wanting to teach.
I hope she's okay. Everything just went bad when she visited Ponyville and she probably hates me now. But I don't hate her.
But she isn't grown up and mature like I am.
I touched my necklace; I'd signed onto this without thinking about it. Saving Equestria would be cool and that was good enough for me.
But even on our first adventure, I had to start changing.
But what am I going to change into? I suddenly wondered if I'd even be recognizable as me in a few years, imagining myself in a suit with glasses and....
No, my Dad just wears glasses so people will know he's smart and even Twilight doesn't wear glasses from reading; that's just a myth.
Tank headbutted me gently and I petted him with a wing, smiling. He knows better than to worry.
I'm just cool in new ways now.
"Hey, Dash, can I come in?" Spike asked.
"Sure thing," I told him, looking up from my mess of notes and scribbles... I can barely read my handwriting. And I made it.
"Twilight said to help you since she and Marcus and Rarity are busy collaborating on something and that your handwriting sucks," Spike said. "So I should take some dictation for you." He didn't sound too thrilled.
"Thanks," I told him. Probably Twilight is just trying to avoid him mooning pathetically over Rarity again. He needs to move on!
But I guess being loyal to your love is a good thing. I touched my element; it was happy with Spike.
"Okay, I'm starting here with the Half-Mile Quarter Races of 131," I told him, shoving the notes his way. "Let's beat this into shape."
Tank crooked his head, ambling slowly over to the notes to study them.
"Don't quarter-ponies train to run a quarter mile or less?" Spike asked. "It's basically sprinting."
"And it was a disaster due to a poorly measured track," I told him.
"But why start there? That's well into Equestria's history," Spike said.
"I have to get their attention with a cool story. Once they see how cool it is, then I can go back to all the begats," I told him. You know, I'm still not sure what 'begat' means but my Equestrian history course started with some complicated list of begats that ended with Celestia. I guess she hasn't been begetting. "You do know what those are, right?"
"It's used in archaic speech to mean being someone's parent. So you'd say something like Crystal Fire begat Heaven's First Dawn," Spike said.
"Those are names?" I said in confusion.
"Of two famous gold dragons," Spike said as if *everyone* should know this.
"Oh, I didn't recognize the translation," I lied.
Spike sighed. "Sometimes I wish I had a dragon to hang out with."
Tank now studied the notes I'd passed him.
"There's lots of kids you could hang out with," I told him.
"Are you going to tell me to chase Sweetie too?" He frowned, then stared at the crude line drawings on my walls.
Sweetie's a bit of a dimwit. A nice one but all she needs to be Ditzy junior would be the eyes. Also, I think she has a crush on Marcus. Or something. "Didn't your aunt recommend Apple Bloom to you?"
"Too country," Spike said. "I like elegant women."
No one Spike's age is elegant. Even Rarity probably wasn't.
"Anyway, some friends your own age, romantic or not, would be good for you." He's too young for romance, anyway.
I certainly would have rather worn one of the dresses Mom tried to force on me than do anything with boys at his age.
Now I feel old.
I am not old!
Just mature.
"You okay?" Spike said, worried.
"I'm fine," I told him. "Just thinking deep, wise thoughts." I tried to look wise.
He laughed and then said, "So you're going to open with the race and then cut back to the beginning."
"Yeah. I want to show them there's cool stuff to come," I told Spike, then launched into another story I've got ready.
You wouldn't think it, but you can spend a long time on work without getting bored if it's actually cool. Or will lead to coolness.
This thankfully took up the rest of the day until bedtime, but it was worth it.
*****************
Half the tribe had vanished and we didn't know why. The winters had been rough and game was bad and we'd lost a few to that but then, bam, half the tribe vanished one night. Farwalker said he'd seen a strange lizard creature, shaped sort of like one of us, but leaning forwards a lot and still having a tail. And shrunken arms. And a lot taller.
So... not much like us at all.
But I knew what he meant.
It was harder now and sometimes we would spy bands of other strange creatures, like us but skinnier and taller, but not hugely taller. I don't think they're as strong as us, but they can *make fire*. We know how to tend it but we've never riddled out how to make it. But I think I understand it now, from watching them.
It had been very risky but I wear the sacred necklace that makes me the champion of my tribe; the shaman says our ancestors got it from the Immortals long ago. It is made of a beautiful shiny yellow kind of rock that is so much smoother than anything we can make.
Smoother even than the tools of the strange intruders; they are better than ours. Sometimes I wonder if the intruders slew half our tribe with their weapons but there would have been bodies and blood and some people had half their family vanish right out of their tent.
I earned this by showing my devotion to the tribe; only one who is willing to risk themselves for others may wear it; it is like a club but made of the yellow rock and so beautiful. It lets me do incredible things.
I carefully held the sticks the way I had seen and began to spin one of them over the other, back and forth, back and forth. To my surprise, it came faster than when I had observed the strangers. They'd struggled but I could easily make the flame, generating sparks and blowing them into a flame.
We could *make* fire. Wood is plentiful here; even if we moved, we could keep the secret of making fire. I taught everyone I could, and that night, we had a feast. I touched the necklace, talking about my mighty deeds, of how I had stolen the secret of fire from our rivals.
And then I realized, the necklace had changed; my beard got in the way of seeing it at first, but the others noticed too. It had become a red crystal tongue of flame, encased in the yellow rock. The crystal was shaped so perfectly, better than I could do it with even my best rock carving tools.
But maybe one day we'd learn that secret too. I took a brand from the fire and began to dance. We all danced. The world had changed; whatever happened to our kin, we would not perish.
I would gain as many secrets as I could for my people. I am their champion, and I will not fail them.
I am Dwaled, the Bringer of Fire! I have done a great thing and I will do many more, for the good of my people. All will remember my name!
******************
I woke up, staring at the ceiling, feeling alien in my own body, having apparently dreamed of being a... short human? Dwarf? Halfling? I'm not even sure. But I am pretty sure he's totally forgotten.
Except by me.
I stumbled around my room in the dark, writing it all down, knowing that you forget dreams after a while if you don't.
He wore the Element of Loyalty. He was some sort of primitive cave-person... not even having fire. Half his tribe *vanished*. What was that?
I resolved to ask Twilight in the morning.
Pinkie now stumbled in and fell down at my hooves. "Flashback...," she mumbled.
"I'm sorry, Pinkie, I didn't plan this," I mumbled.
She sighed and dragged herself off moping.
"Try telling your Element to give you one," I told her as she left.
I don't know if she heard me but it was bed time, again.
*****************
"Oh wow," Twilight said, looking a little jealous. "That's a long ways back. Were you a human or a dwarf?"
"I'm not sure. They're both kind of hairy in that weird human way," I told her. "No offense, Marcus."
He and Twilight were talking shop while Twilight piloted when I had come into the bridge. "None taken," he said. "Did you have a really big beard?"
"No, I was just kind of scraggly. But really muscular."
"A brute-man," Twilight said, surprised. "I suppose they do go back beyond even the God's War."
"The what?" I asked.
"Something wiped out all but a handful of immortals before Ponies or humans even existed. Ixion, Thanatos, Valerias, Ka and a few others predate it. The Elements come from before that war," Twilight said.
I touched my necklace, which isn't easy. I felt the gentle thrum of its power under my hoof. It's seen so much. Not that it has a mind. "I don't know why I dreamed that. And why did the tribe vanish?"
"The brute-men couldn't compete with the rise of the new races. Some of them were taken to the Hollow World to preserve them," Twilight said. "And the rest either died or gave birth to the original dwarven race. Somehow. No one is sure what happened there."
"Couldn't compete? Compete at what?" I asked. I imagined a race where all the losers were killed. Man, that would suck.
Marcus mumbled uncomfortably into his hands.
Twilight shifted on her feet, clearly not wanting to talk about it.
"Come on, I'm an adult. I am mature," I said.
They both began to laugh.
"Don't laugh at me!" I said angrily.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Twilight said, waving a hoof and looking embarrassed.
"You just... reminded me completely of Sweetie and her friends," Marcus said, leaning on the big chair and laughing.
I am not like that at all.
Not at all.
"Well, we can only guess what happened," Marcus said. "From bones and artifacts, as they didn't know how to write and eventually they forgot about their pasts."
"So they forgot Dwaled, the Bringer of Fire," I said softly. Why does everyone keep forgetting all the important things? Why forget the person who brought you fire?
But then I have no idea who brought Ponies fire.
I guess probably the people at the research station. I don't remember any globes about fire but they likely took it for granted.
"Yes," Twilight said softly. "A lot of the past is lost."
I can't learn everything about the past and yet... I can at least learn about the past holders of my Element. How did it get from whatever he was to Ponies?
"So about this competition..." I said hesitantly.
Twilight said, "Well, it seems likely they got too numerous for each other and fought over territory and lots of Brute-men died. And the rest became the first kind of Dwarves."
"First?" I asked.
"They could use magic; most of that kind gradually died out on the surface after the fall of Blackmoor but some were changed by Kagyar into modern Dwarves, who now thrive across the world. And some of the original Dwarves live on in the Hollow World," Twilight said.
So they killed each other instead of cooperating. No wonder Twilight and Marcus didn't want to talk about it. I've heard some bad stories about humans and some good ones. But this is one of the worst ones.
But then, ponykind has fought over stuff too, I know now. Thinking about it made me uncomfortable.
We all shuffled about uncomfortably for a little while.
"PIES," Pinkie said and wham, pies to our face. We now had a pie fight until the bridge was a disaster and we were all laughing.
Thanks, Pinkie.
Even if she probably thinks the Brute-men were a failed toy line now.
She then waved to people we couldn't see; she does that sometimes. "Camera, follow me, I have a clever idea!" she said and ran off.
"Pinkie is *really* bored," Twilight said, shaking her head and looking the way Pinkie went. "Or she wouldn't be so... Pinkie."
Pinkie stormed back in. "No, follow *me*," she said, then raced out back the way she came.
"It's just taking so long," I said.
"I'm sorry, this thing really tires us out," Twilight said, yawning. "You could take Marcus and scout; just be careful and don't go off alone again."
"I already promised I'd take Rarity or I would take you, Marcus," I told him.
"It's okay," he said. "Once she wakes up, she'll be fresh, while I'm kind of tired right now."
Hmm, maybe Fluttershy will want to come; there's probably animals here she's never seen.
*****************
I tried to peel Fluttershy off the tree she was hugging. "What a good tree you are, sheltering those birds," she said, smiling; we were into deep forest now and it was raining cold rain. Rarity had an umbrella magicked over herself; she rode on my back in human form.
What we'd found was that Fluttershy was desperate to talk to animals beyond her bird and snake.
And trees. We've reached the point where it seems to be nothing but endless forest with no signs of civilization. Just animals and trees. Which I think means we're getting closer to the north pole. Beyond this should be grassland that freezes a lot and then just ice.
"Fluttershy, we can't hug every tree in the forest. We need to finish scouting," I told her.
She sighed. "Just a few more?"
"I let her poke around a bit more and talk to a few animals. Rarity was busy studying the trees and I flew around a little to stretch my wings.
And then I heard a huge howl and then other wolves answered it. But they couldn't match the first one. Fluttershy's ears perked up and Rarity frowned. "Perhaps that's our cue to go," she said.
Fluttershy, to my surprise, now became a really big pink wolf and rushed *towards* the howling.
For a few seconds, Rarity and I just stared, then I bolted after her. "Fluttershy, did you mean to run towards the wolves?"
"Yes, something is wrong, and I don't think there are any other druids here," she said very seriously.
Well, we can handle wolves.
*******************
Unless they're the size of Celestia, anyway. And even then, we can likely handle it; the really big one was rather scruffy looking with blood on his fur and claws. Even though nothing was dead yet.
He was following a pack of wolves who were busy scattering a group of deer and running down one of them; a female deer, I think.
"Bad wolves, you take the weak and the old first," Flutterwolf said to them disapprovingly, then frowned at the big wolf. "Was this your idea?"
Rarity made a noise and I stared. What?
The wolves now barked at her and began to circle as the deer ran.
Flutterwolf barked back at them angrily. They turned and began to flee but now the giant wolf barked at them and they circled in confusion in between them.
That giant wolf has no loyalty to them; they're just pawns. But he's very loyal to something but it's hidden from me as to who. "Rarity, can you tell anything about him?" I whispered.
"He's not very generous at all," she whispered back. "The wolves are more generous than him," she said, sounding surprised.
"Wolves share," Flutterwolf said to Rarity, not turning from staring at the big wolf; the two of them began to circle round the wolves; I could see the deer bolting off into the distance. It looked back and I flapped my wings at it, encouraging it to flee.
The wolf growled at her and put its fur up, while now the other wolves clustered together, lowered their heads and pulled their paws over their eyes. I stared at them in surprise.
"He is such a filthy mess," Rarity said softly, and now he snarled at her, and she nearly fell off me in surprise.
"Don't even think it, big boy," I said harshly to the giant wolf but Flutterwolf waved a paw at me dismissively. Then she barked at him.
Surely they're not going to fight.
Or maybe she's lost it.
"Go hunt your own prey," Flutterwolf said to him, sounding angry. "I won't let you push these poor little wolves around any more."
They'd eat us if they had the chance.
I don't really... I've hardly seen Fluttershy deal with predators beyond maybe scaring them off.
I never... why would a wolf that size *need* to use other wolves as his hunting gang? Or is he maybe forbidden somehow to hunt directly by his master?
No, he's obeying his master in this. I think. I touched my necklace, trying to make sure somehow I was right.
He now stalked closer to Flutterwolf, who advanced on him. The wolves now scattered, fleeing the confrontation.
I started forward but Rarity gently tugged me back. "This is her balliwick," she whispered to me.
Her what? Isn't wick what candles are made out of?
But I get the gist of it. It's Fluttershy's fight.
This must be some kind of familiar, maybe? Or a monster wolf. I don't remember anything like this in the books.
Oh man, I sound just like Twilight.
But she'd fall apart. I studied him. He's big and bulky but he moves gracefully. Not deep footprints.
But... I tried stepping; I left deep footprints. Could he be another illusion? But no, unless he can fool my element, he's really there.
But maybe he's not so big as he looks.
I whispered to Rarity, "Can you dispel illusions?"
Circle, circle, snap, snap, growl, circle. He and Flutterwolf were stalking each other and it made me jumpy.
Rarity sighed. "Not unless they relate to clothing or fashion or jewels," she said softly to me. "You think him an illusion?"
"His hoof... foot... clawprints are too small," I told her.
I heard her breath catch.
Hopefully not a sign this is Wolfvarious the Wolf Immortal who is going to eat us. I assume there's some wolf immortal, anyway. I don't really know.
Though I think I could take him.
But it will be harder to cover Rarity too.
They were still snarling and I was still worried Fluttershy was losing it and wondering why they hadn't gotten down to fighting yet. Wolves don't normally wait for their foes to become exhausted from not doing anything, right?
That makes even less sense than it did in my head.
"Hey, Fluttershy, he's not as big as he pretends to be. Look at his tracks!" I shouted.
Flutterwolf looked embarrassed for a moment for some reason, then suddenly spoke a few weird words, rearing to wave her clawed feet. Her foe howled and shivered and then...
That's when it got weird. The giant wolf gave a huge howl and then he kind of shimmered and was like this glowing wolf thing only it wasn't really a wolf, it was hunger. It wanted to eat us, eat everything. Fluttershy's Element, mine, they were food for it.
But it hadn't... it's loyalty held it back. Not fear. Though now I could smell just a little fear on the wind. A little. But its master didn't want it to eat Fluttershy. But what *did* his master want?
I wish Twilight was here, she's the one to figure this out. She probably has a book about it.
Rarity... I could smell her anger. I think. Human smells are harder to tell.
I still don't understand why Marcus smells like the air when you're flying to me. That kind of clean, crisp smell. You know what I mean.
Even if Ivan thinks he smells like bacon. But he didn't stay pony long enough to get it all straight. How would he know how bacon smells anyway? Humans have a terrible sense of smell.
I'm pretty sure cooked pork would not smell like clean air.
Now Rarity was really angry for some reason. Why? "Begone, foul creature!" she said angrily. "Go back to your home plane and trouble ours no more!" Her horn glowed and her element and the power rushed at him.
He turned and howled and then went poof.
Rarity slumped over onto me, nearly falling off. "So terrible," she mumbled.
"You did great," I told her. "Umm... I didn't know you could banish demons."
"He wasn't a demon, but I'm not sure what he was," Flutterwolf said. She now barked at the wolves, who were lurking nearby, scattered and watching. They formed a pack and she sent them off. "Beyond mean."
"He was the opposite of generous. He wanted to just eat everything, suck it all down and share with no one. I couldn't... once Fluttershy revealed him, he just... I hated him on sight," Rarity said, sounding drained and amazed. "This must be how Twilight feels after she does something big. I could sleep forever."
"Someone sent him," I said. "He has a master."
Flutterwolf frowned and became Fluttershy again. "We really have to get to the Pole before it gets even colder but this is something for druids to look into." She looked around the forest, clearly displeased.
"We can come back after," I told her. "Shouldn't there be a druid in charge of the area?"
"Yes. I don't know much about the area to find her, though," Fluttershy said. "I'll pray on the ship." She sighed. "Poor wolves, they hadn't eaten in days because he took all the prey they killed."
My eyes crossed. Druids are so weird sometimes. But I guess it's good Fluttershy loves all the animals of the forest. Even the ones that would... probably eat us.
Or try. I could kick that whole pack's ass if I had to.
Fluttershy helped me stuff Rarity into one of my magical saddlebags so she wouldn't fall off me; having bags bigger on the inside than the outside is very useful. And common in Equestria.
It was time to go, so we went.
**************
Listening to wizards talk shop will rot your brain. She and Twilight and Marcus and Fluttershy were all being very metaphysical. Blah, blah, daemons, blah, blah odyllic linebackers of farce, blah blah, five dimensional bingo, blah.
At least that's what it sounded like to me. Pinkie was listening raptly and spewing nonsense at times. And Spike was pitching into the babble.
This left Applejack, Ivan, and myself to listen and understand nothing.
Then Ivan began talking about Titans and we lost him too. AJ and I decided to go play some cards.
"Next time, you can take me," AJ said to me. "I could do with the feel of the ground; I feel all weird up here."
"Yeah, I'm cooped up too," I told her. "I wish we could get to the pole quicker."
"I mean... I can't feel the ground," AJ said. "It's an Earth Pony thing." She frowned at her cards, then pushed three silver coins over. "I bid three."
I had the two and eight of flames and the three and five of stones and a useless Queen of winds. I matched her three and then threw in my queen, the three and the five, praying for a pair or a flush; she discarded three. Ho ho, she must have a pair. Gilda was always better at counting cards than me, but I can manage that much.
Gilda...
I sighed. I'd grown up and she hadn't. She was still all teenage rebel. Which is why I thought she was cool at the time. She was cool. So was I; we were the coolest kids in school.
Prance is full of Griffons, but she had kinda rejected that; she was too rough and tumble like their ancestors and modern Griffons tend to be really slick. Her father is named Anton and he's just... he's kind of like Rarity if Rarity was a Griffon and had a moustache. Or like my Mom.
I hope she's okay; she didn't have many friends because she was too rough for most Griffons and a lot of Ponies don't like Griffons. I'd like to be her friend still but she's mad at me. Because of Pinkie.
But Pinkie was just trying to be friendly. Sometimes she's too friendly, though.
And Gilda really can't take a joke.
"Sugarcube, you ever gonna see my bet?" Applejack asked.
She had put out another five silver. She looked confident. AJ can't bluff worth a damn, so she likely has something solid.
I... wait, what did I get?, I thought. I wasn't sure. Six of flames, nine of flames, jack of flames! FLUSH! Sweet!
Now I had to figure out quickly if I was ahead of AJ or not.
"You having a flashback?" she asked, sounding amused.
"Sorta. Thinking about an old friend I haven't seen in a while. I hope she's okay." I touched my necklace and felt it pulse. I had a sudden feeling Gilda *was* in trouble and that bothered me.
But it was probably just guilt, so I focused on my cards. She probably can't beat me if she just had a pair before unless she has four of a kind now. "I raise you three," I told her.
"I see," she said, pushing her silver coins over.
She had two pair and so I beat her with my flush! Yeah!
We kept on playing while everyone else distantly yammered about planes and inverted thunder souls or something.
Not my problem.
*****************
Being closely interrogated by Twilight in obsession mode is rather exhausting, especially when Pinkie puts a glowing gem in a funnel and then shines it in your face and keeps babbling about how she is the law.
With a bucket over her head with a slit for her eyes.
"So you could feel he was loyal to something, but not what," Twilight said for the fourth, maybe fifth time.
"Yes. He just looked like a wolf to me until Rarity did whatever the hay she did to him. I don't know any of this magic stuff," I told Twilight, feeling frustrated.
"But you can tell I am loyal to Celestia," she said thoughtfully.
"I don't need magic to know that," I told her. "I think he was able to partly hide it somehow."
"And he didn't fly," Twilight said thoughtfully, circling me, while Pinkie continued to glower through the bucket.
"We'll catch this perp," Pinkie said darkly.
"Dahling, I think you'll blind her if you don't turn out the light," Rarity said to Pinkie.
Thanks, Rarity.
"When you interrogate someone, you shine a light in their eyes and glower until they break," Pinkie said. "Everyone knows that."
Spike began shivering and then said, "I ate the cupcake, okay? It was ME. I ate them ALL."
This got her to interrogate him and I was glad.
AJ was idly doing rope tricks and listening; I could tell she was feeling kind of bored. I would be bored if I wasn't so sick of this.
"I told you everything I know," I told her. How can answering questions be so tiring?
"If he can shield himself against an Element, he must be very powerful," Twilight thought.
"I think he was afraid of Fluttershy," Rarity said. "So not powerful enough to just hold us in contempt."
"It was loyalty which held him back. But he wasn't strong enough to stop Fluttershy and he could only partly block me. Maybe some druid summoned him for some reason?" I speculated.
"It's possible," Fluttershy said. "A druid shouldn't go around summoning hunger spirits like that, though. And they can't normally turn into a wolf."
"I wish I had been there," Ivan said, frowning. He touched his amulet. "This lets me detect things related to the Immortals."
"I refuse to take the blame for that incident, I was teething!" Spike said loudly, drawing my attention for a moment.
"Pinkie, do you know any stories about hungry wolves?" Ivan asked Pinkie.
"Lots but they aren't so magical," Pinkie said. "Isn't Petrov and the Wolf a Karameikan story?" She looked thoughtful. "This can't be the Wolf Who Cried Boy either."
That name doesn't even make sense.
"Maybe the wolf form was just an illusion," Rarity said. "Given it didn't have the right weight anyway. So it's just a hunger spirit with a wolf illusion."
"My homeland has a lot of stories about wolves but not this wolf," Ivan said.
I suddenly wondered if it had something to do with those poor timberwolves.
But that was hundreds of miles away from this.
"I will try and pray for guidance," Fluttershy said. "I will be in my room with Slither helping me. If that's okay with everyone."
"That's a great idea, and I will send Celestia a letter," Twilight said.
"Can you send one to Luna for me?" Ivan asked Spike.
"I was *given* that souffle," Spike said to Pinkie. "And YOU ate it." He pointed an accusing finger at her.
Pinkie nudged him gently and he said to Ivan, "Sure thing."
"I suppose I should ask Helga to inquire among her kin," Marcus said, frowning.
"Father might know something from his military experience. If you don't mind sending so many letters, Spike. I don't want to wear you out," Rarity said hesitantly to Spike.
His eyes crossed and he sighed, then said, "It's fine. It's when I *get* a lot of letters at once that I can get kind of sick."
She nodded and AJ said, "Wish I could help but I ain't got no one unless Granny ran into one of these... I guess it can't hurt to ask."
I don't... hey! "Time to write Soarin', see if any of the Wonderbolts have run into something like this." I should write my boyfriend, anyway.
"Don't forget to put some hearts on Ivan's letter to Luna," Marcus said to Spike, grinning.
Spike glared at Marcus; Ivan said, "We are not like that!"
"Uh huh," Marcus said, grinning. He now kissed Rarity, who was still in human form.
Ivan and Marcus then began wrestling around until Twilight made them get off the bridge before they broke something. Fluttershy then lectured them about... I don't want to know, really. I went to my room to write my letter to Soarin'.
***************
An hour later, I'd discarded ten attempts as utterly terrible. Too soppy. Not soppy enough. Too many rambling diversions. And my effort to draw us together looked like something a five day old foal would make.
By drooling on paper.
Aaaargh, I am no good at this but I think the only people on here who are any good at this kind of thing are Marcus and Rarity, both of whom will tease me.
Or my Mom but I still haven't told her I am seeing Soarin' or she'd have me in dresses. Magical ones that glue themselves to you.
Even Rarity isn't as obsessed with pretty dresses as she is.
"Hey, Dash, you ready to send your letter yet?" Spike asked from outside my room.
Tank gently nudged my side with his head. It's his way of being comforting. I patted his head. "Good boy," I said softly and he smiled. To Spike, I said, "Still revising!"
Five drafts later, Rarity came in. "Hello, darling," she said to me. "Having trouble with your letter?"
"No, I'm cool," I told her. The last thing I need is something so mushy that the sugar knocks Soarin' out. It's gotta be *me*.
But I'm not used to writing letters.
Which causes Mom to yell at me. By mail.
Dad's more mellow about it. Because he's lousy at letters too.
"It must be a very long letter," she said, coming around to gently pet Tank and try to look at my letter, which I now flopped over onto in order to hide it.
"I have a lot to say." I don't even know what to say. I'm not good with words and when I try to say how I feel, I sound like a little kid.
"Just make it simple, like you," Rarity said.
"I'm not a simpleton," I said, frowning.
"No, I mean, you are bold and direct. So be bold and direct. No need for frills. Just say how you feel, how much you miss him, how you wish he was here. Not everyone need be as fancy as I," she continued. "May I hold him?"
I let her pick up Tank; she was still in human form. He cuddled up to her. As much as a turtle can.
"I just feel like I have so much to say but I can't get it into words," I said softly. "I just think of him and I just feel so much." It's kind of scary, sometimes.
I have never had a coltfriend before but don't tell anyone that. I was too tough for the guys at flight school; they just saw me as another colt. And I wasn't interested, anyway.
I had my eye on being a Wonderbolt. I still do but I have a feeling that being an Element of Harmony is where I'll be in ten years.
I bet Rarity had a ton of coltfriends in high school.
I glanced at her, and she was smiling and gently stroking Tank under his chin like he likes.
I wonder if Soarin' would like that or if it's a turtle thing.
"You going to stay human a while?" I asked her.
"Until it wears off, anyway," she said. "Marcus and I are either sleeping or stuck in the chair most of the time when we're awake." She sighed. "You can't imagine how draining and boring it is."
I can totally imagine, I just remember them talking shop.
"Seeing Fluttershy face that thing down was kind of amazing," I told Rarity. "I wouldn't have thought she could do it." I'm proud of her but I feel weird after seeing it.
"I can't imagine caring about wolves like that, but I guess that's part of being a druid," Rarity said. "It's strange. They're not as frightening when I'm like this. It was a threat but normally, wolves make me very nervous and it was just... I felt much less scared of it."
"I wasn't scared but nothing scares me," I told her. This wasn't true, boredom scares me. Not being cool scares me.
But giant wolves? I've faced down an immortal and got away with it! Hah, I would have whipped his ass.
"I suppose being a wolf made her braver," Rarity said thoughtfully.
"She should just turn into me," I said and Rarity laughed. She has a pretty laugh.
"What did it feel like when you were human?" Rarity asked me, petting Tank's head. He was licking her cheek and she laughed.
"Weird sense of balance," I told her. "It is SO much easier to walk on two legs as a human instead of a pony that I could hardly believe it. And their forelegs are jointed weirdly backwards. That feels really strange."
Rarity studied her forelegs. "You're right, they are. Though you can rotate them around."
"And your field of vision shrinks so much, though it's easier to see movement," I continued. "No sense of smell hardly at all. I didn't get to eat anything but that would mess with your sense of taste, right?"
"I believe so; Pinkie would know," Rarity said thoughtfully.
"Anyway, I felt the same in my mind but my body was totally different. It was harder to feel the air and my wings were bound under the clothing, which was kind of irritating. I doubt I could use my weather powers easily," I told her. I rolled onto my back, splaying out and studying the ceiling. Which has badly painted clouds on it. "Do you like... I guess Unicorns would feel the field of magic everywhere, right?"
"Yes but most of us aren't good at anything past their cutie mark magics and some basic things for polite society. But I can sense magic," Rarity said. "And I know the theory, of course; I refused to get bad grades even if it didn't seem so relevant to my future." She sighed. "Now I wish I'd studied more but I didn't think it would ever matter."
I felt this bloom of recognition in my heart. "I know, that's how I feel too. It just... my teachers really sucked on anything not related to flying."
"Or you didn't care," Rarity said, sighing and studying Tank.
"They didn't make me care." I touched my Element. "I just feel this connection to things I didn't used to. The things important to me are changing. I guess... I guess it's getting older." Which makes me feel weird.
"I know, darling, we're all changing," Rarity said softly. She put Tank down and now sat down by me, hand on my back for a moment, though then she removed it and looked embarrassed and I don't know why.
"I won't melt," I told her, a little amused.
"It's... nothing, darling." She seemed to look around, not sure what to do with her hands. They ended up on her legs.
I stared down at my letter I was writing. I need to change into a me who is any good at this. Somehow. "Mom was always good at writing letters," I mumbled.
"Your mother is an impressive woman," Rarity told me. "She has quite a reputation." Her cheerful voice made it clear to me about that.
"For not being satisfied with me," I muttered.
"Oh, parents are like that. They want the best for you and can take a lot of effort to convince that their path isn't yours. Mother always approved of me, but Father's disappointed none of his children went into the military."
"Yeah, I can't imagine you lasting five minutes," I said. Me, I'd kick ass but all the officers are so *bossy* I would go mad.
Rarity sighed and looked a little guilty. "I did learn archery from him and I'm glad I did. But I wanted to be my own boss and I don't like fighting."
"I like fighting but I like being my own boss too," I told her.
I was surprised when Twilight stuck her head in. "Need help with your letter?"
"Aren't you flying the ship?" I asked.
"Fluttershy volunteered to pull it for a while so we could all rest," Twilight said. "It was very kind of her."
Wow, she's... not that big on flying. But our unicorns have been doing all the work and... I could have volunteered and didn't even think of it. Though this thing must be kind of heavy to pull. "Maybe I should go help Fluttershy."
"Finish your letter first, darling," Rarity said to me.
Twilight tried to pull my letter out from under me and I crouched over it instinctively. "I've got it," I told her.
"You wouldn't be hiding it if you did," Twilight said and now I was embarrassed. How could she tell?
Distantly, I heard drums.
I tried to ignore them and said, "Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt if you helped."
She scratched out virtually every word, rearranged the sentences and changed all the spelling. She even had better penmanship.
"Too precise," I said. "He'll think I didn't write it."
"You signed it your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle, darling," Rarity said to Twilight.
Twilight stared, then buried her face in her hooves.
With them helping, I eventually managed to bang out a letter, though it sucked.
I guess sometimes you have to cut your losses.
I hate writing letters.
***************
The last thing I expected was Ditzy, in a scarf, a ski cap, and a sweater, banging on my window. So I opened it and she tossed me a sheaf of mail through it. "Here you go! Letters for everyone! The mail must go through and now it's gone through the window! Mission... ACCOMPLISHED!" She now saluted my right shoulder.
"Ditzy, how did you get all the way here in frozenland?" I asked her, feeling the blast of cold air come in the window.
I could see snow falling all around us and some distant blue blur in the air, which I guess must be how she got here, some kind of ship. Zeppelin. Flying thing. We were over ice and snow now, very close to our target, beyond even the taiga. Or is it the tundra?
"I had to hitch a ride." She stuck her head in her saddlebag. "There had better not be anyone hiding in here!" she shouted into her bag. ...
"You shouldn't let your mouth sag or something will fly into it," Ditzy said kindly. "Good luck on your mission, I have to take some mail out to the fifth planet."
"Didn't it blow up and turn into asteroids?" I asked.
She now looked embarrassed. "Hahaha. I didn't say that, I meant the other fifth planet. Which didn't blow up. It's just... SHOES!" She darted off into the howling snow.
Shoes? I closed the window and sorted the mail. I had a note from Scootaloo, which opened with 'I am not bitter at all' and got more bitter from there.
Sorry, Scoots but this is dangerous and you're still a kid.
I suddenly feared we'd reach the site and they would *already be there* somehow. I put the rest of my mail aside with Tank standing guard over the letter from Soarin', then played mailpony to everyone.
"Lyra promised me she'd keep them busy," Marcus told me. "And I've searched the whole zeppelin three times."
"So how do we land this thing? As it's too snowy for Fluttershy and I to land everyone," I asked.
I was up front now; Rarity was sleeping but Marcus and Twilight were up in the pilot room; I expect they were busy talking magic shop before I came.
"If Ditzy could get here so easily, we should have used whatever she used," Twilight grumbled, then sighed. "This makes a good mobile base, though. And yes, the fifth planet blew up in a battle between the Immortals and the Outer Beings, after Arik of the Hundred Eyes succumbed to their temptations. Of course, that would make Khoronous the new fifth planet. And it's only named after the Immortal, before you ask."
There's an immortal named Khoronous?
That does make sense that you just renumber once one blows up.
But why is Ditzy delivering mail there?
***************
{Dear Dashie my Darling,
I miss you so much. We did a show in Shireton today for a charitable endi... endo... thing which our Ambassador there is sponsoring, rehabilitating halflings who got corrupted by Chaos in some sort of odd fighting club. Anyway, I wish I could be there with you.
Lightning Flash thinks he's heard of thought elementals which embody emotions; hunger is sort of an emotion, right? Thunderclap says there are goblins that turn into wolves and vice-versa, but this doesn't sound very wolfish. Maybe a very strange werewolf?
Spitfire says she has heard that magic fails if you get too close to the poles; it's intended to keep away travelers. I hope that doesn't happen to you.
Dawnstar says to remember to wear your cold weather outfit; she's heard of pegasi's wings freezing so they couldn't fly when they tried to go that far north. PLEASE be careful.
I wish I knew something fancy to say or could be more help. Love you, Rainbow Dash.
Your coltfriend,
Soarin'. }
I hugged the letter, smiling. Some maybe useful advice and he loves me! And there's no danger of hobbit women seducing him in Shireton.
Then I thought about Marcus and winced, then shook my head.
Marcus isn't a hobbit. They're like stomachs with legs.
Soarin' wouldn't go for that.
Spike now came in, holding a scroll. "Letter from Crash," he said, tossing it to me.
I was a little surprised, but okay, that's fine. Maybe I should send her an update.
It was hard to read her horrible scrawl, so I may be laying it wrongly for you here, but this is what I think I read:
{Deer Raynebow Dash,
I hate Thonia. I hate everything in Thonia. I especially hate Thonians, who are all crazy sighkicks who think you are out to steal their sandwich, therefour, they try to control your mind and steal your secrets and discuss all your thoughts about your coltfriend in front of everyone and then you just want to die.
Thonian Pegasi are terrible flyers and lousy at controlling weather, but they all have really strong sidekick powers which enable them to be even more obnoxious than the humans. The humans at least do not want to date my coltfriend! And he doesn't flirt with the humans.
Dammit.
*The next paragraph was one big blur for some reason.*
Clarity offered to set me up with a pony she knows but I can't be sure if he actually exists for real or is the way she remembers him or even if he is male. I wouldn't give up so easy even if I was sure.
You are SO LUCKY, DAMN YOU.
*The next paragraph was a blur too.*
Dammit, a sighkid read my mind while I was writing this letter. I am going to go kick his ass. Hold on.
Dawn Gleaming said to tell you that she will pay 300 gold if you can secure her an ice core down to the bottom of the ice.
She did not explain what it is, but I assume Twilight will know.
Hold on.
Okay, back. Had to kick another person's ass. I hate this inn so much.
It's called the Temple of the Gorf. This is apparently the funniest possible joke to the locals but no one will explain it to a 'hindbrain'. Isn't a hind some kind of deer? Am I being mocked? Maybe I should kick all their asses on general principles.
Bloody hell, Clarity is freaking out because her wine was watered down. I will continue this later, when I stop Spikey trying to set the waiter on fire even if he deserves it so much.
Back. Hate sighclicks so much. I think Dawn Gleaming is joking about tinfoil hats, though.
Dammit, I had some reason for writing this paper and now dinner is here.
Back. Okay, the fried potatoes and mushrooms are really awesome and Dawn Gleaming assured us that they removed almost all of the poison, just enough to give it a tang. It was really tasty but the mushroom wine, so good.
*Three pages of illegible scrawl follow this*
That stuff really has a kick and now I can see dead people!
*One page of illegible scrawl follows*
Don't ever drink the mushroom wine in Thonia unless you like... who scribbled this junk all over my letter? Dammit!
There are damn crazy sidlekick frog-people all over this damn cold swamp. Why did it have to be a black dragon who died? At least Cruisin' isn't hitting on them.
The good news is that I totally kicked the ass of the giant four headed frog-giant-lion-butterfly thing. Whatever it was. I ran rings around it until it crashed into a tree, fell over, and sank into the swamp.
Anyway, Spikey says I should send you this before we reach the cave. Wish us luck.
Kick some ass at the poles and be glad there are no killer frogs.
Or sighknids.
Your Elder Sister,
Rainbow Crash }
*I* am the elder sister!
But I'm glad she's doing well.
I think.
*****************
"I am pretty sure we won't be flying into the anti-magic zone," Twilight said.
"Pretty sure," Marcus said with his 'we're dead' tone of voice.
"It seems awfully dangerous to have an anti-magic zone in a frozen wilderness," Applejack said, frowning and looking out the window.
We were all up in the piloting room, talking and staring out the window at the endless snow and ice.
"It's to keep people out of the Hollow World but we're not going there," Twilight said.
I would love to go there like Daring Doo did but I don't have time right now.
"I can make sure your wings won't freeze," Fluttershy said to me. "I know a spell."
"Thanks," I said to her and she smiled brightly; she has a pretty smile and I am surprised she doesn't have a coltfriend by now.
*Twilight* has a coltfriend.
That may mean the end of the world is on us.
I shouldn't be so mean; she'd already dated Marcus or whatever exactly happened with them.
"I can keep us warm," Spike said confidently.
"I will send Celestia a letter so she'll know if something goes wrong," Twilight said.
"Is there some way to sense it ahead of us?" Ivan asked.
"If I cast the flight spell, I could scout ahead for it," Twilight said.
"That sounds like a way to end up falling to your death," Marcus said, frowning.
"I can carry Marcus," I said. He needs another bravery lesson. "He can sense it and I can dodge it."
Marcus was wary but you know how he is; I soon got him suited up and we took off.
*****************
I shouldn't fly upside down but I had to tease Marcus a little; he clung to me desperately and I laughed then got right side up and we flew around; there was no snow coming down, just endless ice. If this is later summer here, I fear what winter is like.
But it's cool to see it. You can see the curve of the planet from up here with the terrain so flat and boring. I knew abstractly that it was curved but it's usually not so obvious.
Damn, it is even colder here, though.
We're really close. I could feel it now. "You sensing anything, Marcus?"
"I think one of my past lives went to one of the poles," he told me thoughtfully. "Only I think it was the South Pole."
"Was it like this?"
"More dinosaurs and we found this ancient Elven ruins; Haldir thought it was where the Elves were first born," Marcus said softly, sounding thoughtful.
And then the ice cracked and the most hideous grinding noise went off and I could see the ice MOVE, very quickly, as we both stared. On one side, it suddenly sheared upwards, exposing rock; on the other side, it now was overhung by the left side rising. Marcus had us come down low to check it out.
Okay, here's the freaky thing. When you got close to where the rock had sheared, you could see tiny shells and things embedded in it. Bones, and so on. But how could fish get into rock to get stuck and leave their bones behind? Or imprints of their bones?
I asked Marcus and he said, "Pinkie might know the details; I've seen this before but I don't know how it works. Or Twilight." He frowned. "I guess an earthquake just happened. Hopefully not a sign of a hideous monster burrowing up from beneath the ice."
"Oh, I'd just dodge it," I told him, then laughed.
When the hideous giant purple snake monster, its mouth big enough to swallow my house, erupted up through the ice and tried to eat us, I wasn't laughing so much. Until it missed and smacked its head into the rock and *then* I laughed. It missed thanks to my very nimble flying and I now rose up out of its reach as it burrowed down through the ice.
"Okay, this is bad," Marcus said, frowning.
"That we didn't get eaten?" I asked.
"That it knew where to aim. Purple worms feel vibrations; it shouldn't be able to aim at someone up in the air," he said.
Now the ground cracked again and again; good thing I fly! Pretty soon, it was a purple worm party and two of them started trying to eat each other, bashing each other with their bodies and trying to wrap around each other.
I got higher and they gave up and all began digging down except for the two who were trying to kick each other's... side. They really don't have a butt, I guess.
Marcus frowned. "Let's scout forwards."
We encountered no anti-magic but a lot more ice and several more areas where the ground jutted up, freshly breaking the ice. So we gave up and reported back to the Zeppelin.
*******************
Even with ice over everything, you could see we were in a valley as we hovered over ground zero. It's all so frozen here; we could see weird lights on the horizon, huge waves of light. In places a few spires of rock stuck up through the ice and I suddenly wondered how deep it was.
And why Rarity had covered half the meeting room's floor with chalk marks. And ringed it with candles. And had Spike holding up a scroll for her. Why not use telekinesis?
Especially when Spike looks so embarrassed.
Twilight said, "I can do it for you."
"No, darling, I can do this. I have to." Rarity, back in pony form, licked her lips nervously. "The circle is right, isn't it, Marcus?"
He had an odd look on his face, but he said, "Excuted with perfection as I'd expect of you. Don't worry, Helga knows her stuff." He sighed. "Better than me on air magic."
"Air magic?" I asked.
"Hair magic? Let me help," Pinkie said from the hallway; I now realized I was blocking the doorway and moved aside.
"I am going to summon an air elemental," Rarity said, licking her lips.
"Isn't that something for really powerful wizards?" I asked, and she glared at me. "I mean, you mainly just do your fashion magic and a little telekinesis, right?"
She drew herself up and tried to tower over me. Given she is only a tiny touch taller, it didn't work all that well. "I am a unicorn," she said, a little haughtily. "Magic is my blood. Any unicorn can become a great wizard if they set their mind to it."
"You might be better off practicing with dust devils before you move on to a whirlwind," Twilight said.
The gaze of Rarity caused her to freeze up and mumble about warmup exercises.
Marcus opened his mouth, then shut it as her gaze flickered to him. He began lighting the candles.
Pinkie stuck her head in her saddlebags. "Where's that whirlwind costume..."
"Rarity, you ain't gotta prove you're a great wizard for some reason. What if it goes wild and wrecks the zeppelin?" Applejack said to her.
"Darling, you know as well as everyone how strong my will is. This will go smoothly, and Fluttershy can dispel it if something goes wrong," Rarity said.
"Wouldn't it be safer to summon it down on the ice?" I asked. I know hublis... whatever it's called... when I see it.
"I cannot, in fact, easily get there under my own power to summon it, unless I first summon it," Rarity said carefully, her eyes intense.
I looked at AJ, who looked at me, then said, "Rarity, this smells dangerous to me."
"Anyone who is worried can go down to the ice without me," she said tightly.
Can't she just use that butterfly wing spell or get Twilight to cast it for her? Or ride in someone's saddlebag.
"Don't worry," Marcus said calmly, though I think he was faking it. "Helga wouldn't give Rarity a spell she can't handle and she is very strong willed. And Fluttershy is a good druid. We'll be fine."
I guess maybe I can stuff everyone in my magic saddlebags and fly home with them but I have a bad feeling about this.
"Ra..." AJ began.
"I don't tell you how to tend your blueberry trees," Rarity snapped tensely.
"Blueberries grow on *bushes*," AJ said.
"Exactly," Rarity said.
What?
"You can do it, Rarity, I believe in you," Spike said, though his voice strangled at the end.
"Spike, I can hold it for her," Fluttershy said kindly.
"No, I'm good, it's just paper," he said, looking at Rarity while trying to not look at her.
Sorry, man. I'm not much on reading people's faces but you would have to be blind not tell how jumpy Spike was around Rarity. I can't blame him. Being dumped sucks.
Rarity and AJ stared into each other's eyes deeply and I shuffled on my hooves. I glanced at Marcus; his loyalty warred with his other emotions but in the end, it outweighed the rest. I guess that's one reason we get on well. Even if Rarity blew the place up, he'd go along with her on this. He felt he owed her. I guess it's a love thing; I'd be on Soarin's side if he wanted to... there's really no way Soarin' could blow this place up.
Maybe with a really big cloud...
I forced myself not to imagine us jumping on clouds to zap people with lightning much as I know a few ponies who could use a surprise zap.
Part of me suddenly wanted to prank Rarity but the other part worried that would blow up the ship.
I am getting old.
I will prank her once we no longer risk apocalypse; I can tell Twilight and Marcus are both worried about this. That makes me worried. Rarity can do a lot of stuff I know Marcus or even Twilight can't, but she doesn't do this kind of fancy wizardy stuff, right?
Also, AJ and Rarity were having a stare-off and I could feel the air between them crackling with power and it was making my coat stand up. Pinkie was deliberately getting close to get as fuzzy as possible and I couldn't help it.
I just started laughing and everyone stared at me and I pointed a hoof at Pinkie who laughed too and now we both rolled around... all over the chalk so we got covered in it.
"Dash, look at what you are DOING," Rarity said, aggravated. "It takes forever to draw all that!"
AJ let out a deep sigh. "Rarity, there ain't no shame in lettin' another pony help you."
"Said the pot," Rarity said tightly.
AJ now stared at the window, out at the snow. "Okay, maybe I ain't the best pony to say that. I know all about wantin' to be the best you can be. But is this really the best answer? I could probably make a rig so you could lower yerself to the ground if that's what you want."
"Oooh, I think I have something on that..." Twilight stuck her head in one of her saddlebags, trying to find the right book.
"I can do this. Helga gave me very precise instructions and if her daughter can do this, I can do it," Rarity said firmly.
Helga lets her little kid summon air elementals? Surely not. Maybe she was bragging.
"That kid is really amazing," Marcus said, looking embarrassed.
Oh I get it. Can't let someone else outshine her. She probably took it as a challenge. I had a coach like that, claimed his kid could outfly anyone. Made you work harder.
I bet that's exactly what Helga was doing, trying to push Rarity out of 'I want to be a great wizard', where you just talk about it, and into 'becoming a great wizard'.
I'm not sure why she suddenly wants to compete in Twilight's area, but hey, competition makes you better.
And I can totally understand not wanting to have to depend on others.
But sometimes, you have to.
She needs me and I'm going to help her.
"Then let's do it; daylight is limited and I want to get to digging; the air elemental can help us dig down. I didn't meant to destroy your runes, Rarity, I'll help you redraw them."
Rarity being Rarity, she ended up just about redrawing it all, but as I drew, I tried to put my Element's power into it and to strengthen her work. Only I can't tell if it worked or not.
I was weirdly tired afterwards and flopped down, watching as Pinkie cheered in this weird pink outfit with these weird bushy streamer clump things over her forehooves and Rarity began to chant. I expected her element to light up; the fact that it didn't made me even more nervous, though her horn was glowing. Twilight was pacing around until Fluttershy hugged her to get her to stop moving.
AJ was idly doing rope tricks in the corner with her magic rope; I suspect she was ready to fight it; I was too exhausted. Man, I must have done something cool.
I put my goggles on, just in case. If nothing else, I'd look cooler.
Ivan now began throwing things through AJ's rope hoops for some reason, only half watching the rite.
This spell, by the way, takes freaking forever. I was starting to fall asleep as the runes began to glow and my Element glowed; Rarity's still wasn't glowing and that worried me. I guess this is just for her but will she have enough power without it?
Rarity finished chanting with a bunch of nonsensical babble, "Mi pignarean hai go!" she shouted.
And then suddenly, my weather sense kicked in; pressure shifted and winds began to circle a central column. I watched with interest now; I could feel what was happening; this was like Pegasus magic. I just wished I was less tired.
It howled and tried to break loose and I felt the power flare in the runes and I concentrated on holding it still.
"Marcus, darling, the bottle," Rarity said.
He floated a bottle of some orange liquid; it had a label which read 'Happy Orange Farms: Orange Blossom Perfume'.
AJ's eyes widened. "Dammit, Rarity, did Apple Blossom sell you that? We have a perfectly good line of perfumes my aunt Delicious makes, you know."
I couldn't help start laughing. What a name to stick your poor kid with! I wonder if her sister is named Tasty.
"I made her a nice dress and she gifted me with a selection of perfumes," Rarity said, waving a hoof. "Mister Elemental, how may I address you?"
He howled and battered the barriers. I wonder if this is a big one; he was at least six feet across.
"He says he is the mighty Tree-Smasher and he is going to blow you to the Moon for summoning him," Fluttershy said, then looked worried. "Oh dear."
"She did send you the binding spell, right?" Twilight said in a sudden panic.
"Now, now, I couldn't force a thinking creature to obey me," Rarity said, doing her little strut thing. Which would probably get most stallions to obey her but I don't think it works on Elementals.
"I have invoked thee in the style of the White Order, as instructed by a member of the order," Rarity continued. She held out the perfume. "Aid me in this mine work and I shall pay thee with this, or more if thee likest it." Her voice was all weird sounding now. And she seemed to pretending to be in a historical play. Her Element now began to glow.
Then they started haggling with Fluttershy as a translator. Seeing Fluttershy make weird wind noises is kind of spooky. Me starting to gradually understand them was spooky too; by the end, I could understand what they were both saying... okay, I already understood Rarity but you know what I mean. Rarity ended up throwing in three more bottles, but I expect she carries twenty or thirty, anyway.
Some of the wind now solidified into a bracer of ice which she clamped onto her right foreleg, with runes in it; he then vanished into the bracer. She stroked it idly. "What a lovely design; I had hoped to get an artist," she said approvingly.
Marcus suddenly slumped and Twilight said, "Well done, Rarity." She looked thoughtful and a little worried.
So I had to pounce on her and tumble around with her, tickling her, until we ended up in the hallway.
"You okay?" I asked her.
"I just... hadn't really thought about it. But some elementals are intelligent," Twilight said. "I don't really do summoning much." Now she looked guilty.
"It's cool, right?" I asked hesitantly.
"Yes. And nice job with the runes," Twilight said, shifting to being happier. She touched her own forehead, stroking her element. "You're getting good with it," she said approvingly.
"Well, we all need to practice, right?" I told her, wondering what else cool I could do.
"Yes. Let's get going; I need some fresh air; we've all been cooped up in here too long." She trotted in place the way impatient ponies do.
"Bored of your books?" I teased her.
She looked embarrassed. "Not bored, I just... Even at school, I wasn't stuck all the time in one small building. I love you all but being locked in here with everyone all the time is a little too much. I kind of envy you for being able to get out more," she said slowly, maybe a little reluctant to admit it. "Also, piloting is really, really, incredibly boring."
"Yeah, it's not like real flight. You going to get some wings?"
BAMF, spell, wings. "Yes," she said, grinning.
"RACE YOU TO THE GROUND!" I told her.
I won, of course. Oh yeah.
****************
Only after I landed on the ice, which stretched across and buried a valley through the hills, did I see what I had most dreaded to find here.
The Cutie Mark Crusader FLAG.
"Dammit, Lyra promised to watch them!" Applejack said and began looking around.
Twilight wrote a letter and had Spike send it, then we fanned out.
But we couldn't find the Crusaders *anywhere*. Unless they buried themselves under the ice. No tracks, no sign of a vehicle, no traces of teleportation. But how else could the flag get here?
Lyra sent us back a letter after we'd done a long search; we heard music and Lyra singing about how the Crusaders were all building a really great two-seater catapult which would really hurl things a long way though she wasn't sure why it needed actual pony-style chairs for the launching arm instead of a scoop.
"Oh wow, a Musical Sending," Pinkie said. "Okay, we must stage a musical to send her back a message! Hold on, I have a barn in here somewhere." She began digging in her saddlebags.
"The flag is itself mundane but there are tiny traces of telekinetic magic," Twilight said.
"It's a real flag," Applejack said, studying it.
I now remembered. "Twilight, Dawn Gleaming needs an ice core and she'll pay 300 GP for it. What's an ice core?"
"You cut a cylinder of ice that runs down to the bottom of the ice," Twilight said. "That might actually be useful to study the ice layers, which could help us to dig down more efficiently."
"And we owe dark ice from the bottom that hasn't seen sun in a thousand years," I said thoughtfully. "To Apple Bloom."
Marcus eyed the flag as if it would bite him.
Pinkie and Applejack stomped around the ice. "I'm thinking this is a hundred feet deep," Applejack said hesitantly.
"And there's water under it," Pinkie said.
"Wait, a hundred feet? Polar ice is generally not more than twenty or thirty at most and usually more like ten to twenty!" Twilight said, frowning.
"The lake's pretty deep, I guess," I said. "This valley used to be a lot deeper than it is now."
"Maybe something is making it colder here?" Fluttershy said hesitantly.
"This is a job for the greatest weather pony in Equestria," I said. "Fluttershy, back me up. We'll figure out why there's so much ice."
"Maybe the Crusaders somehow flooded the area and it froze so much," Spike said.
Man, I hope Scoots isn't frozen under all this.
"We'll work on taking a core," Twilight said to me.
I nodded to her and we took to the air, trying to take the measure of the wind but everything is a mess here; chaotic air currents, no stable regions of pressure, it's clear the weather is totally unplanned here.
Which is creepy. This must be how Rarity feels when Sweetie messes up her workshop.
"Should there be animals or plants or something?" I asked Fluttershy.
"There may be fish under the water or anaerobic lifeforms, especially if there is any sort of hot vent, though that would melt the ice, I think," she told me, sniffing the air.
"But it's not unnatural for there to be just ice," I said hesitantly.
"There is too much ice here but it's otherwise normal," Fluttershy said.
I wonder if something happened here during the battle to make more ice and it just stuck? Maybe there's a Decanter of Endless Water?
The weather here is like trying to move molasses. And hard to read. I got Fluttershy to stir up a little wind so I could read it. Pretty much cold and getting colder, not much in the air; it's really dead here.
We spent a long time working, while I could see them trying to drill down into the ice to get a core out and breaking a lot of ice in the process, in part because when Rarity's elemental buddy tried to help it made a big mess.
Finally, I flew down. "I don't think it's natural for there to be ice so deep here but I can't figure out for sure if maybe the weather changes in some other part of the year."
"This should be the least deep time of year," Fluttershy said. "I think."
"The ice is exceptionally pure," Twilight said. "Is there some way you can analyze it?" she asked me. "I am armed for drilling but my library is really short on water magic."
I got her to slice some ice with magic, then Pinkie and Applejack stomped it, then I whipped it into the air and Fluttershy and I began shaping it into clouds; it was too pure; it wouldn't cohere properly into clouds. "Someone purified this water to make it hard to manipulate with Pegasus weather control," I said, frowning. "Maybe the Crusaders did something."
"Maybe this is the wolf's revenge," Rarity said, frowning. "If it was connected to the earlier incident, it may now know who you are and be back for revenge," she continued. "Or maybe it is Cunning Thought behind it all, interfering with you as she did with Twilight."
"She just talked to me," Twilight said. Then she frowned. "I think."
"But she'd know Pinkie and I can break this ice up; it's not like Dash needs to make it into clouds to accomplish anything, right?" Applejack said hesitantly.
Ivan took a tentative whack and did serious damage, forcing me to deflect ice shards. "Ack, sorry, everyone," he said, embarrassed.
"This is some kind of trap. Once we break the ice, we'll regret it but Dash and Fluttershy won't be able to freeze it back over," Marcus said, frowning. "Right?"
"I think we could handle freezing but not fast," I said, then looked at Fluttershy.
She nodded.
"Hmm, perhaps someone had a Decanter of Endless Water and dumped it out for a while," Twilight said thoughtfully. "That pulls water from the Elemental Plane of Water; it is very pure and it would then freeze; Cunning Thought likely has known a while we would come here," Twilight said. "Maybe there are monsters hidden in the lake. I could try scrying."
"Okay," I said.
She did a ritual from one of her books, then frowned. "Lead particulate in sufficient quantities to block scrying. Someone is hiding something," Twilight said, frowning.
"So we can't feel nuttin' through the water, you can't scry and it's too pure for the pegasi," Applejack said, then looked at Marcus and Ivan. "Got any human tricks?"
"I can start melting it but I'm reluctant to drill a hole that a crazed water elemental might erupt through," Marcus said, frowning.
"I can't sneak through ice. I can break it up with some work but that could release whatever is in the way," Ivan said.
I grimaced. "Dammit, Cunning Thought! Show yourself! Or Crusaders. Or whoever is messing with me!!!"
If anyone was there, they didn't show themselves.
"Maybe we could make a periscope," Applejack said. "I don't rightly know exactly how it works but it would let us peek down without letting nothing big out, right?"
"There likely isn't light down there for us to see," Marcus said. "Which I guess is good for us getting Apple Bloom the ice we promised her." He looked for something to sit on, found nothing and basically looked aggravated.
"So there's a sheet of lead?" I asked.
"A layer of lead in tiny particles in the ice; not solid enough to trigger Earth pony senses but good enough to block scrying," Twilight said.
"Fluttershy, any chance you could sense anything alive down there?" I asked. "Or does the lead stop you too?"
"I will try," she said and began to pray, Element glowing softly.
Pinkie had galloped off and up the slope to the east and was stomping around thoughtfully.
"Hey, wait, can you do that thing your sister does with her drums?" I shouted to her.
"Not nearly as well; I have to bang my hooves," Pinkie shouted back. "She's really good at it."
What would Daring Doo do?
Probably crash the zeppelin in a fight with ice gypsies and then the treasure would be revealed.
Which would be awesome but I don't see any ice anything except ice ice.
"Do your weapons have any sensory tricks?" I asked Marcus and Ivan. Maybe they can power through this somehow.
"Hmm," Ivan said and began walking around, waving his hammer. "I think I'm being blocked."
Marcus studied his sword. "Magical sword, if you have any tricks for getting through this, you might want to tell me." Then his eyes glazed over and Pinkie ran down at blinding speed, crashed at his feet and her eyes glazed over. Spike laughed, and I couldn't help but giggle.
Then Pinkie sighed. "No music at all. No dancing."
"The last thing I needed was a flashback to falling down that damn mine shaft," Marcus grumbled. "Stupid flashbacks."
Rarity gently nuzzled him and he put a hand on her back, sighing.
"Well, Dash, it's your call," Twilight said. "This is your quest. We can just drill down and see what we find or else we are stuck, I think."
Normally, I would say 'full speed ahead' but whoever did this is counting on me rushing in headlong.
But how else are we going to find out?
"Can you get the ice core first and stuff before we risk everything going boom?" I said.
"Drilling the core will crack the lead layer," Twilight said. "And we need to break through it to get Apple Bloom her old enough, dark enough ice."
My gut says to break it.
But there's a little Marcus in my head telling me to be careful; I glance at him and he's talking softly to Rarity.
"Hold on," I said and settled onto the ice, then concentrated; there should... I hope... be a way to sense the staff, since it's connected to her loyalty; that would tell me we're in the right place.
I began sweating inside my clothing; I could feel the ice try to stop me, feel it push back. It must be the lead.
I have to know if this is the right place. Or if I am wasting my time.
Our time.
Fluttershy put a hoof on my shoulder and prayed, supporting me. Thanks, Fluttershy. We've been friends ever since I stood up for her in Cloudsdale. Mostly just to show off. I knew her but I wasn't impressed. But those idiots pissed me off with how mean they were.
It kind of surprised me. I guess I can be kind of mean sometimes, though I think of it as being honest. I don't say anything that isn't true, unless it's a prank and those are all in fun.
Dad would come up with some brilliant idea to solve this. Mom would just somehow convince the ice to put on a dress and go to a dance and be a debutante, so Dad could get the staff. Then she'd make the staff a line of special boots or something.
Marcus would make a hat for the ice. Or steal its hat, maybe. Or talk it into something.
Focus. I tried to think of Barrel Roll. Of Dr. Iricia. The others who fought and died with them, who only I and Twilight really remember now.
But others will know. They will know. I will not let them be forgotten.
I could feel the lead; it was a wall, blocking my movement.
I don't like walls.
It dug in its heels and I dug in mine and pushed, wishing my mind was stronger; Fluttershy's gentle strength sustained me. I could break the barrier.
I *would* break it. I'm good at breaking things. I tried to feel it out like I would a storm; water droplets form around particles; these water droplets formed around lead then froze together.
I could work this; the pure water had nothing for me to easily handle to work it into shape. Not like making rain; but the lead, it was just what I needed and straining myself, I made it obey me.
Slowly the bits of ice began to move, bunching together to one side, making a small hole, slowed by the weight of the ice. I couldn't do this without my element and even with it, I was straining myself. But this would be an awesome thing to brag about, how I made a tiny storm buried under ice.
Oh yeah, everyone will remember that!
I was sweating bullets and drained but it moved enough for me to poke through and I could feel it; everything was down deep. Deeper than the water; somehow dirt had covered the dead but their items were there. Things I could put in the memorial so each of them would be known.
Fluttershy now said, "There are hundreds, maybe thousands of various kinds of magically warped fish. They live on some kind of weird energy in the water but I'm not sure what it is."
Twilight joined us, riding my power, extending her magic through it and peeking. Her eyes widened. "The water is thick with Utherite in particulate form."
"Magic stuff?" I said.
"Utherite is more or less solid magic," Twilight said. "The Blackmoorians powered their magical reactors with it and when they went up, it devastated the world in a rain of colorless fire. But buried under the ice, it can't get loose and cause trouble. Someone deliberately buried this valley more to trap it."
"But I need to get down to them so I can be sure they were put to rest properly and so their items can go in the memorial so people will remember them," I said.
"I bet the ice worms burrow down to the water layer and eat the fish," Pinkie said thoughtfully. "Maybe Fluttershy could turn into one and burrow down?"
"We can drill but it will be tricky doing it without causing the Utherite to get triggered and unleash a tide of wild magic," Twilight said, frowning.
"If we just bash with heavy objects, it won't send out a lot of magic, right?" Ivan said.
"I kin bash pretty good," Applejack said.
Is it just me or is her accent thicker than usual lately? Twilight frowned. "And who put the Crusader flag?"
An idea hit me. "Hey, I need a bunch of busted ice; don't need to go deep."
Pinkie, Applejack, and Ivan ran wild, bashing up ice.
"Fluttershy, on my mark, follow my lead," I told her.
She nodded and then I whipped the ice into the air in a spiral by flying around with Fluttershy trailing after, then whipped it outwards in an expanding wave.
Which left a large pony-sized hole in the wave when it HIT AN INVISIBLE PONY.
Who I now charged and knocked down. "GOT YOU!" I crowed.
"Why Dash, you're so forward, but what will Soarin' think?" Cunning Thought asked me coyly as I laid tangled with her.
I got FAR away as she rose, shaking the ice off; she was a bit of a mess now, mane bedraggled and little flecks of ice all over her.
She hadn't worn cold weather clothing either.
"I am loyal to my coltfriend!" I said urgently.
"The Crusaders are safe; you may thank me now for talking them out of stowing away on your ship; the flag was just my little joke," Cunning Thought said, striding up to everyone. "And you would be well advised to leave this alone. If the Utherite escapes it would be a disaster."
She has to be tricking us, but how? We know that's true, so where is the lie?
Dammit, Marcus, do your word magic!
"They had better be safe," Marcus said angrily. "An Immortal toying with children? For shame, not that you have any."
"Someone is jealous Sweetie looks up to someone other than him," Cunning Thought said sadly, chidingly, to him. "Rarity, I hate to ask, but I am a dreadful mess from trying to adventurerproof this area and I could really use some help."
"Of course, darling," Rarity said, her gear coming out of her saddlebags. "This cold is not ideal for this but I will do what I can."
Marcus stared and so did I. Rarity, what are you *doing*?
"Marcus, darling, assist me," Rarity said firmly to him. He stared, then grumblingly began helping to brush out Cunning Thought's mane and tail as Cunning Thought made happy noises.
Then she looked at me and I understood; she's buying me time to do something.
But what? What can I do?
Gut says bash the ice open, deal with the Utherite stuff, then get everything we need and go home before we freeze to death or die of old age.
Brain says she clearly expects me to do that and why has she been screwing with me all this time?
Inner Mom says I'm a mess and need a bath. Sorry, Inner Mom, you're useless to me right now.
As usual.
Ugh, I am sweaty and tired from my funky manipulation of the lead and the ice. I bet Prof Tailfeathers would be proud of me now.
"Did you open a portal to the elemental plane of ice or something?" I asked Cunning Thought.
"There is no elemental plane of ice," Cunning Thought said. "It was the Elemental Plane of Water." I could hear the capital letters. "It's safer this way, anyway."
Rarity was now trying to wash Cunning Thought's mane, not an easy task in this weather. Marcus had to keep creating tiny amounts of flame so the shampoo wouldn't freeze. It was going to take them forever.
I glanced at Twilight; she was frantically consulting two books at once, one of them sitting inside the other, like two pieces of bread with one on top of the other. But unless she has X-ray vision, she couldn't read the bottom one so why do it like that?
Hmm, if I just boom the ice and tunnel down, then I could whip up a storm, suck up all the water and the utherite and form it all into more snow and ice flakes and that would ensure it wouldn't go anywhere. Then Twilight could just do something or another to dispel it or we could haul it all up to the anti-magic zone which would kill it.
Assuming I could keep it under control; I've never had to handle water laden with flakes of unstable solid magic. I'm a good weatherpony but weather is easy to handle in Equestria. Whereas here, it doesn't want to cooperate. I mean, I have handled storms coming in from the Everfree but I always had a team and this is just me and Fluttershy and she's not good at this.
If I had my team, like we did when we got chosen to replenish Cloudsdale...
But I don't. I have this team and I love my friends but they're not weatherponies.
If I do this, it's just me and that's all.
I eyed Cunning Thought; she had her eyes shut and was babbling on some story about the time Luna got lost as a child and ran away from bunnies, thinking them a dangerous menace. Everyone was laughing, except for Fluttershy, who now said, "Bunnies are very nice!"
"Yes, but she didn't know," Cunning Thought said. "Listen carefully, Ivan, you won't find anyone else to tell you embarrassing stories about your girlfriend's past."
Ivan grunted and Cunning Thought laughed softly. "You're so cute when you hate me."
Rarity and Marcus were still slowly working the mane over. They'd need to do her coat too. I had time but not a lot of it.
Actually, we should drill down, then let me suck it out; too much risk a rainboom would ignite all the Utherite. And I bet Cunning Thought was counting on that.
Then I'll have to suck the water up and reprocess it into snow and do it without setting it off.
Something I expect no Pegasus has *ever* done before.
I imagined us all blowing to bits and I shivered. I couldn't even keep from destroying my prom dress after Mom spent a week on it, can I really do this?
I think I dithered for quite a while as the next time I checked, Rarity and Marcus were busy trying to clean Cunning Thought's coat and were half done.
Ivan looked close to just accidentally drilling down to the water with the vibrations from his feet as he kept tapping his foot impatiently while he glared at Cunning Thought.
Twilight now had ten books in five pairs and was frantically making notes and drawing charts while Spike assisted her. Pinkie was roaming around, looking for something, while Applejack paced around in a circle and kept glancing up at me. And Fluttershy lurked next to me, waiting.
"I believe in you, Dashie," Fluttershy whispered to me, a hoof on my shoulder.
I shuddered and then relaxed. I can do it. I am the greatest weatherpony in Equestria. The best racer. The Element of Loyalty. I have to do it because otherwise, the fallen will remain trapped under all this forever and no one will remember them.
"Alright," I said. "I have a plan."
*******************
I expect without Cunning Thought present, we would probably have had a big fight over my plan. But we had to show a united front and, well, this is my quest.
If I blow it, we all die.
I am not going to blow it!
The drilling was, in some ways, harder than what I was going to do because we had to do it without magic. Or else we might detonate the Utherite.
We had to take apart two of the inner walls of the Zeppelin to get the raw materials to build a giant screw drill which Pinkie and Applejack would then use to drill through the ice. Cunning Thought had called us insane and retreated to the nearby heights to watch. I suspect she knows she's lost but wants to watch in case we're entertaining.
I licked my lips nervously, watching them drill. Down, down, down. We'd designed it so that it would extract the ice core that Dawn Gleaming wanted while also making a big enough hole for me to work my magic. Twilight lifted the core out and moved it up to the zeppelin before we broke the lead layer. Now we enter the danger zone.
I suddenly wondered how Twilight is going to keep the core frozen. Well, I'd worry about that later. We can take another one if we have to once it's safe.
Once it's safe.
I heard crunching noises and then we pulled the drill out. We had a hole, and I hoped it would be big enough. "Fluttershy, ready?" I asked her.
"I don't know if I can be much use to you, Dashie," she said, embarrassed.
"You're a Druid of the Golden Circle," I told her. "There's nothing nature-y you can't do if you set your mind to it."
She looked uncertain anyway but that's Fluttershy.
"And if you fail, Angel Bunny will cry," I told her. A cheap shot but she needs the motivation.
Her eyes widened and now she looked determined to do better. "I won't let him cry!" she said firmly, though for her a shout is like me talking normally.
I got Tank down with his flying rig on; it isn't a lot but I need all the help I can get. Fluttershy cast a spell on him to make him gigantic. Man, I didn't even think of that!
I hugged his head, which now was as big as my torso. "Yeah! Let's go!"
And then we began spinning around the hole, forcing the air to spin and creating suction which began drawing out the water; it looked like water with a huge amount of pepper shaken into it and as it came up, the winds got faster. And faster. Some of the black flecks began vanishing and the weather magic got easier and easier and TOO EASY.
"Everyone clear out!" I shouted and Twilight teleported everyone to a safe distance, then flopped over.
I hope it's a safe distance.
The ice was blowing apart and now there was chunks of leaded ice colliding with Utherite and a half-frozen hurricane and it was feeding on itself and if I couldn't control it, it would just go rampaging across the landscape, spewing Utherite everywhere.
Fluttershy and Tank couldn't handle it so I had to fly to them and get them rightside up again, so we could move in formation and I could protect them with my wake. My element shone brightly and we circled the storm, containing it, but it was exhausting and I was already tired from before.
I shouldn't have drawn them into this but I didn't want to do it alone.
And now the storm was getting bigger. It was too much. I couldn't do it by myself and Fluttershy and Tank couldn't do much to help me like this, hard as they tried.
But they tried.
Fluttershy was crying but she was flapping as fast as she could and Tank was just ambling along confidently like he always does. He never gives up and that's an inspiration to me.
I have to change the game or I'm going to lose. We'll go down demonstrating the value of friendship but not its SUCCESS. I've bitten off more than I chew.
Dammit! I can't fail. Because if I do, this storm is going to hurt all my friends and probably turn us all into toys.
I could see a pink doll of Celestia, tumbling in the wind now. I stared, eyes wide and it said, "I'm a pretty princess!"
Several more dolls of my friends appeared and I realized that this thing.... There's so much magic that even stray thoughts can trigger a chain reaction.
It'll probably turn all my friends into toys! And then we'll be buried in snow and never played with.
Which is even worse than turning into a toy.
I guess the Fluttershy toy would come with a bunny to hug and... I shouldn't think or it's going to happen.
Fluttershy, just for a moment, looked like a toy to me, but then she was Fluttershy again and it was probably my imagination but I was starting to panic.
And then it hit me. "Fluttershy, you have magical seeds, right?"
"Yes," she said. "But they can't keep this water under control."
"And trees drink lots of water, right?" I asked.
"Yes," she said.
"I need you to get out of the storm, ring it with trees and have them suck up the water. The roots can dig down to the water, right?" Hah! Now Fluttershy can use what she's good at! I am a *genius*.
Her eyes lit up. "I'm on it!"
She dove out of the storm, which now got even harder to control but soon she and Applejack and Pinkie and Twilight were busy raising huge trees which sucked up the water and produced... polished black apples? Apples full of Utherite? Man, I bet that's a hell of a bite.
Rarity and Marcus were still keeping Cunning Thought subdued via makeover; I prayed she wouldn't stick her hoof in and mess this up.
As the trees grew, the storm got weaker and I began freezing it into snowflakes, with a black fleck at the center and lacy white ice around them and letting them settle down gently into a huge pile of black and white snow.
It was easy now and my Element shone like the sun. Who's a toy now?
Man, I bet I could turn Cunning Thought into a toy with all this.
But maybe she wants that for some crazy Immortal reason.
She is part of the Sphere of Entropy, I think. Who are crazy evil chaotic maniacs.
How she gave birth to Celestia, I don't know.
"I love having my hair brushed!" talking pink Celestia said, blowing past me.
A Ditzy toy went by as well. For a moment, I thought it was a miniaturized Ditzy, which honestly, would not be surprising at all.
She came to a weather control emergency like that and wouldn't explain why, one time.
In fact, she tried to claim we'd all been enlarged.
Now I'm wondering why she was on her way to Khoronous.
I shook my head. Focus. No...oh hohh
I thought really hard 'PRINCESS CELESTIA TOY YOU NEED TO GO SAY HELLO TO YOUR MOTHER.'
"I love my mother!" she announced and flew around the storm and out of it; the other toys trailed after her and now Cunning Thought looked up and stared as they closed in on her.
"Hey, my hair isn't like that at all!" I heard Pinkie protest. "It's like I have a pony-tail on my forehead!"
Some of them are kind of weird looking. But I now focused on snow snow snow snow snow snow snow. Snow.
Tank and I went round and round and round and I was proud of him for keeping up with me. I couldn't give up if he didn't, so I pushed myself to my very limits and beyond.
By the time I finished, I was utterly exhausted and Cunning Thought kept shouting, "SHUT UP," at the talking Celestia doll as it kept trying to hug her and prattle at her; but she was trapped as Rarity and Marcus were now fitting a dress on her.
Fluttershy had to catch me... okay, I kind of fell on her, really. I was utterly exhausted but I had a huge pile of salt-and-pepper colored snow, the Utherite was now contained in it or turned into talking dolls, and Tank now settled down next to me and tried to cuddle, which nearly squashed me, until Fluttershy turned him back to normal.
I think it's naptime.
*******************
"I do not want to brush your hair!" Cunning Thought was still snapping at the doll when I finally woke up to find they'd dug a big hole down to the ground level with all the water now out of the way and Full Moon was here. For some reason, but I guess I slept through his arrival. Hopefully, he'll keep Cunning Thought from causing me any more trouble.
Rarity was still trying to get Cunning Thought's outfit to work, though, I noticed.
"My mother is the best!," Pink Celestia doll announced and Cunning Thought sighed and worked on brushing her hair.
"That was an insane gamble," Cunning Thought said to me.
"I go big or not at all," I told her. I had to be me. "But having my friends backing me up made it work."
"They should have saved themselves; Celestia would have been in trouble if all her Elements of Harmony died," Cunning Thought said, chidingly.
"We would never abandon Rainbow Dash," Applejack said firmly. She was busy studying the weird Utherite Apple Trees, which stood on the ice, roots sinking deep for water.
I hope they can get enough water with us sucking the lake out.
"That could have killed you," Cunning Thought pointed out.
"Math is hard!" Pink Celestia now announced.
"It's not hard! She'd never say that," Twilight said, frowning. "You take that back!"
"Math is hard!"
I laughed as I watched Twilight yell at a toy.
Spike was busy cataloging the various items; he had a chart of where they had found them; man, how long did I sleep?
The sun was setting, so a long time. Dang.
"I went back and buried them all, before they were buried in snow," Full Moon told me. "Their souls went on to rest before reincarnation, though Dr. Iricia still serves me as a Titan. And Barrel Roll, though likely she will go to serve Celestia whenever Celestia retires from this plane."
"A what?" I asked. I ought to know this stuff.
Ivan, who now startled me by appearing from behind Full Moon somehow, said, "The Titans are semi-Immortals; they don't have full Immortal powers but they live forever in service of the Immortals. Usually it's a reward for people who didn't succeed in their quest but didn't fail completely either. Or for really valiant service. They have no worshippers and can't grant spells, but have powers of their own."
Ivan is really weird when he knows things.
I don't know if that's good or if you'd spend forever remembering you just weren't *quite* good enough for the real thing.
"My mane is so beautiful!" Pink Celestia toy announced. Then she began flying. "Let's fly to the castle!"
"I can't fly while I am being fitted," Cunning Thought said irritably.
"Sorry, darling but making clothing from scratch takes time," Rarity said. "You will look smashing in this green but I can't figure out if I should slash it with gold or not. What do you think, Marcus?"
"Her coat is solid but her mane has the color changing flame effect, so maybe give it a slashed hood and a solid body?" Marcus said hesitantly as if he wasn't making a dress for an evil goddess.
"I would rather have a hat than a hood," Cunning Thought said.
"A magnificent hat, then," Rarity said grandly; I think Marcus looked jealous.
"Flying is so much fun!" Pink Celestia announced, flying around Cunning Thought's head.
"Don't taunt me!" Cunning Thought said irritably.
Best prank ever, I decided.
"I love to make new friends," Pink Celestia announced, hovering over Cunning Thought's head.
"Of course you do," she said, frustrated.
"Any chance I could meet her?" I said hesitantly.
"I will arrange it," Full Moon said.
"Cool." Man, if I could get her to come to my grand opening of the memorial, that would rock.
"I guess you ensured the Element would move on," I said, touching it.
"It found another bearer before I was able to come back," he said.
"Hmm, I think this is the best felt I have," Rarity said thoughtfully and began making a hat as Marcus stared and Cunning Thought stood trapped in half-made clothing.
"And we don't know who made it," I continued.
"I am far, far younger than the Great Interruption," Full Moon said. "Only a handful of Immortals know of the world before it and they're not telling. Neither your kind nor humans existed then." He had a faraway look. "The world changed in fundamental ways. I once travelled to the distant corners of the multiverse in search of knowledge, penetrated the great whirlpool of stars and down Sinbad's Funnel; only he had ever gone so far before, because I had heard there was an oracle there, who could answer any question."
Twilight's ears perked up and she stopped trying to lecture Pink Celestia about the glories of math. "You made it down Sinbad's Funnel? Does it really lead to another Dimension?" she asked eagerly.
"He wasn't the only one," Cunning Thought said, looking smug.
Twilight glanced over at her and Pink Celestia now asked, "Are you a Princess too?"
Ditzy Doll now bounced off Tank, stumbling upwards, shouting about how she loved muffins. Tank rolled over and I flipped him back onto his legs.
"Of course I am," Cunning Thought snapped at Pink Celestia.
"I make the sun rise in the morning!," Pink Celestia announced, then circled Cunning Thought's head as Rarity fitted the hat on her, forcing Rarity to dodge.
"This land is an echo of the beginning," Full Moon said softly. "I did not exist in the beginning but now I do, and so does it here, an echo of higher things."
Okay, I think we're about to ride the Weird Metaphysical Stuff train.
But this must be important, so I tried not to just hallucinate music the whole time.
"Tell me you're not about to say this whole land was a toy," Applejack said, frowning.
"Celestia is my daughter," Cunning Thought suddenly snapped angrily at Full Moon. "Stop taunting me with this damn thing! I can smell your power all over it."
Wait, I thought I made it. By accident, but it was me.
"Rainbow Dash made it, by accident; having that much unstable Utherite around, she could have made almost anything with enough willpower and control," Full Moon said. "It's safe now as long as no one breaks the snow too much. An interesting control mechanism. I expect Celestia can put this to good use if you can keep it frozen."
"Oh, I have a preservation spell," Twilight said as if she hauled around huge piles of magical snowflakes all the time. I studied how she said it with that kind of 'casual cool about being awesome'. I admire that.
"Liar," Cunning Thought said tautly. Pink Celestia now attempted to cuddle her but her limbs can't actually move except for flapping her wings.
"Let's fly to the castle!" Pink Celestia announced.
Rarity was now knee-deep in sewing with Marcus holding threads and needles for her with magic.
"Mini-me, cooperate with your makeover," Pinkie said, trying to style the Pinkie doll to look like her but it wasn't working. Sorry, Pinkie, I didn't mean to create them that way.
"If you are in a trap, Cunning Thought, it is one of your own making; not everyone can be Korotiku," Full Moon said firmly to Cunning Thought.
Be who? "So what exactly did you find out down this funnel cake thing?" I asked.
Applejack started laughing for some reason.
"Just a little longer," Rarity said apologetically to Cunning Thought.
"A toy is a tool for building the imagination," Full Moon said. "There is great power in toys."
He found toys down the space funnel thing?
"Would you like to comb my mane?" Pink Celestia asked Cunning Thought.
"I already did," she grumbled.
"Okay, and done!" Rarity said, stepping back. I'm not sure how practical a fancy dress is for the polar ice cap but it was a pretty dress and Mom would have loved it. Especially the flame motifs.
Okay, I love the flame motif and she would have loved the layering on the hat to make it look like it was made of fire.
"I am the prettiest princess," Cunning Thought said cheerfully, posing, though I'm sure she's just mocking us or the doll or both. "Are you going to announce that therefore, everyone's dreams can be real? We both know better than that," she said sourly.
Here comes the metaphysical choo-choo.
"Pinkamena made her dreams real," Pinkie said softly, sounding proud.
"You can do amazing things with Shadow Magic," Twilight said excitedly. "I've been studying the books Keraptis gave me." She chanted and now another Twilight appeared, though her cutie mark was a potato.
Applejack began laughing and Twilight looked frustrated. "But they never come out quite how I imagine them."
"Potatoes were planted by ponies during the time of the Orcs as food because the Orcs were too lazy to dig them up if they got mad at the ponies," Potato-Twilight said proudly. "There are over a thousand breeds of potato! Most unicorns don't bother with farming but I have honed my talents to ensure no pony will ever go hungry." Then she looked a little sad as if remembering something.
"Something you will learn by the time you are my age is that nothing ever comes out the way you imagine it," Cunning Thought said kindly to Twilight and I wondered how she could snap between emotions so quickly. "Dreams never work out the way you hope they will, or plans."
"Potatoes are very shy," Fluttershy said to Potato-Twilight. "It's hard to get them to open up."
"Well, they like to talk about soil," Potato-Twilight said amiably and they now launched into a complicated discussion of soil.
Twilight frowned. "That usually means you didn't plan enough."
"Dream on, my dear daughter," Cunning Thought said kindly. "It's good for the young to dream while they still can."
"I still don't know what you found down the funnel thing," I said to Full Moon. I had a feeling we would never find out if I didn't keep hammering on this.
Potato-Twilight and Fluttershy were excitedly discussing zinc. I don't even know what zinc is.
Pink Celestia doll now announced, "I am the Queen of Hard Liquor! Do you like Hard Liquor?"
Cunning Thought stared at the doll.
Applejack and Ivan and I laughed loudly.
"The Oracle's wisdom does not come cheaply but I learned what I came for," Full Moon said. Light began to swirl in front of him and then it collapsed into a weapon. "With it, I forged my dagger." The dagger had a blade of shimmering crystal inside which you could see a rainbow. The hilt was platinum and made to resemble two snakes, one with diamond-shaped scales, the other with lozenge-shaped overlapping scales. The first had a book on its forehead, the other a pair of lockpicks. "And with this, I destroyed the Spear of Destruction, which had begun the Godswar through its use to slay Kathan the Balancer. And with its destruction, I joined the ranks of the Immortals and prevented the Ahfridi from destroying Blackmoor in its infancy."
Cunning Thought backed up slightly, but Pink Celestia flew over to the dagger. "Hi, I'm a pretty princess!"
"Oh dear," Potato-Twilight said. "My time is up." Then she evaporated and Fluttershy looked horrified.
"Sorry, the spells don't last a long time, yet," Twilight said, frowning. Twilight then had Spike make a sketch of the dagger for her.
"So you were still mortal, then," I said softly.
"Didn't the Ahfridi follow Zugzul?" Twilight asked.
"Zugzul is still a bedwetting idiot whose followers make useful patsies for the intelligent," Cunning Thought said dismissively. "I expect a young foal could outthink Zugzul. Sweetie certainly could."
Damn, that must be one stupid Immortal. "How did anyone that dumb become an Immortal?"
"He isn't that stupid, he just rushes headlong into things without thinking about it or planning how to recover from disaster," Full Moon said.
OWW. Hey, I *did* think this through!
"And he's one of the few survivors of the Godswar," Full Moon continued. "He knew the power of that spear, just not that Thanatos had wanted him to have it."
Twilight looked over at Cunning Thought, who said, chidingly, "Celestia dear, you shouldn't play with artifact daggers."
Pink Celestia flew back to her and I wondered if she was just being silly or somehow can't tell this is just a toy or... I really don't understand her. "Would you like to comb my mane?"
Cunning Thought facehoofed. She must be trying to make us laugh for some reason. Then she sighed.
"So you can learn anything there?" I asked.
"That's what it claims. Not everyone likes the answers," Full Moon said, then sighed. "Anyway, the sun is setting, so I must go, and you will all likely want off the ice before it gets even colder than it is now."
"Yes," Ivan said, then came over to Full Moon. "I... umm..."
"Scootaloo is a perfectly acceptable apprentice if she wouldn't rather be training with someone else," Full Moon said.
Applejack kicked me in the ass for no reason at all and I nearly fell down. We started tussleing which actually felt pretty good as I needed some stress release.
But I got tired really quickly.
"Some people are kind of blind," Ivan said to Full Moon. "They don't notice the obvious."
Yeah, I can't stand people who can't see what's in front of their face. At the moment, that was Applejack, who I needed to whip before moving on to anything else.
"Dash, darling, you are going to be a mess if you don't stop," Rarity said.
As if I haven't seen her throwing people around when she feels the need.
"Anyway, it won't hurt to train her; I expect she has a big future ahead of her. They have chosen the high road, dangerous as it is," Full Moon said. He spread his wings, stretching, then lowered them. "As have you. I am off to Corunglain. For now, train your apprentice and assist Celestia and Luna."
"I will," Ivan said very seriously.
"And continue your studies," Full Moon said. "Luna will teach you well."
"My daughter is very intelligent," Cunning Thought said proudly.
"I understand your Hierarch is rather displeased with you over what happened," Full Moon said oddly calmly. That kind of fake calm, you know the kind.
I was mainly focused on beating Applejack's ass, while Fluttershy stared at us horrified.
We're just playing, Fluttershy. It's just for fun.
"They're just having fun like Ivan and I," Marcus said reassuringly to her.
"I'm rather displeased with her for changing her mind so quickly," Cunning Thought said. "But it is quite clear that I was busy dealing with an intrusion from the Mythic Plane when it happened, as per orders from the Council of Intrusion. Nor was I the one who decided she ought to get herself bound for a *thousand years* by said Council for her little tantrum back at the start of this current age." Cunning Thought sounded quite angry over that. "But then, we never get treated fairly by the councils." She now sounded very bitter.
"I seem to note Thanatos voted for said punishment," Full Moon said.
Twilight gasped for some reason; maybe if I knew who Thanatos was beyond 'death immortal guy', I would care but at the moment, I was focused on taking out Applejack.
"I love my sister Luna!" Pink Celestia said excitedly. Cunning Thought grimaced more.
Marcus blinked. "He did?"
"I believe he said something about how we'd be making people's pet dogs into Immortals next, too," Full Moon said calmly.
That made us all frown, and for a moment, I thought Cunning Thought was just going to leap on Full Moon and try to tear his throat out with her teeth. "Do not bait me," she said harshly. "Not *you* of all people."
I let go of Applejack, frowning. Something's going on here and I don't quite get it.
"Was that really necessary?" Ivan said, shuffling nervously.
Pinkie now ran over at high speed and interposed herself. "The day is late!" she sung. "We should all rest, so tomorrow, we can do our best, and not be... umm... in crates!" She wobbled a bit at the end.
Applejack reached for me, saw me frowning, and got up, then looked at me questioningly.
"Okay, what's going on here? I won't be happy if you two brawl and break all the stuff we came for," I said, trying to be firm.
"There will be no brawl," Cunning Thought said, regaining her calm. "I would hate to destroy Rarity and Marcus' hard work. Or yours, Dash. But are you sure people want to know about this?"
I frowned. "Why wouldn't they want to know?"
"People often don't like a truth which is less glorious than the lies they are used to," she said kindly. "Shattering illusions by telling the hard truth is not a way to get yourself loved and admired, as I know you wish to be."
Marcus mumbled to himself and Rarity gently patted his side with a hoof. He put his hand on her back.
"They died for us," I said flatly.
"Honesty is the best policy," Applejack said. "I back Dash totally on this."
"Now," Cunning Thought said. "You were rather eager to forget it all, weren't you?"
Applejack rocked uncomfortably on her hooves; her hat fell off and she caught it with her tail. "Yeah, but I changed my mind and saw sense. You ever gunna do that?"
"I am the very soul of sweet reason," Cunning Thought said cheerfully to AJ as if she hadn't been close to choking Full Moon a minute ago. What is with her?
"Lies have their uses," Full Moon said. "But the truth and honest dealing is better. I endorse your plan, Rainbow Dash." He now made the floating crystal dagger vanish. "Sooner or later, the truth always outs, anyway."
"Not always," Cunning Thought said. "Or so long that it doesn't matter any more."
"So why did you try to stop me?" I asked. "You sent your wolf twice and put a child in danger and... but now you're not even trying to stop me." I had the feeling I missed something.
"Now, now, that would be telling," Cunning Thought said a little chidingly. It reminded me way too much of my Mom. "But as for why I am not trying to stop you now, I must embarrassedly confess you were just too good for me to stop. No point in embarrassing myself with another defeat."
AJ snorted as I posed excitedly, feeling cool.
"Yeah, pull the other one. Why, really?" Spike said suspiciously.
"Her powers are limited in this form," Ivan said. "We could beat her up, I expect. But it wouldn't really kill her, as this is just a mortal avatar or she wouldn't be allowed on this plane." He touched his amulet for some reason.
"She probably just wanted to make it look like she was trying to stop us for some reason," Marcus said.
"You do realize I can hear you," Cunning Thought said, amused. "It was my duty to challenge you, Dash. You did better than I would have thought. You can believe that or not."
Ivan snorted.
"Just remember, you will be my son-in-law one day," she said cheerfully to Ivan, who now looked like he was choking on something.
"You know I'm awesome," I said to Ivan, frowning.
"I know," he said. "But she is an Immortal."
"You can call me Mom if you like," she said to Ivan, who grimaced, which amused her more.
"That's enough fun for one night, I think," Full Moon said to Cunning Thought.
Cunning Thought sighed, then tucked Pink Celestia into her saddlebags. "Anyway, we had best go and let them get up to where it's warm and start their long trip home. I just hope you know what you're doing, Rainbow Dash."
"I always know what I'm doing," I said confidently. This is going to be awesome even if I'm now basically sharing a room with AJ and Fluttershy. But that should be fine.
*********************
Waking up in the night with something crushing you is not fun at all. I flailed and shouted, trying to get loose, then I heard Fluttershy shouting, "I'm over here, Slither!"
Slither let go and snaked off into the darkness as I tried to relearn how to breathe.
"I'm sorry, Dashie, he likes to hug me when I'm sleeping!" Fluttershy said.
'Hug'.
"South field needs fertilizer," AJ mumbled *again*. She has been farming in her sleep for *hours*. She crashed like a rock and I don't know if I've slept *at all*.
I want my walls back.
******************
"Look, I'll be blunt," AJ told me the next day after Fluttershy had gone to bathe. "Scootaloo is pretty disappointed that you won't mentor her. I think she and Ivan get on okay but she is kinda jealous that all her friends have an adult or three they admire tutoring them and she doesn't even get a pony mentor."
"Her mom bit me one time," I mumbled. "She doesn't like me."
AJ blinked. "Seriously?"
"Plus, if I train her, every pegasus kid in town is gonna want me to," I told her.
"You ain't gotta say yes, but I think she'd do good to have a Pegasus. Ivan's a good guy but he can't fly or nothin'. And ain't you gonna be a teacher this year anyway?"
A good point. I just...
Well, I am going to teach anyway at the school. They already have someone for coaching pegasi, so I might not end up having to give all my free time to munchkins if I train Scootaloo some.
"She needs an art tutor too," I said.
AJ rolled her eyes. "I could say that about you."
Yeah, I kind of suck at art. "I guess maybe I'd better get some advice on how to make my memorial look good," I mumbled.
"Yes," AJ said. "And give Scootaloo a chance, okay?"
"Okay," I told her.
****************
We got back to Ponyville without any more disasters unless you count days of me not getting any sleep because of friendly snakes or Fluttershy mistaking me for Angel in her sleep or AJ's need to constantly discuss with her pillow about how the south forty was doing.
So I set out to find Scootaloo and offer her some training.
I could hear Dinky and Scootaloo busy singing about chain gangs as they worked on weeding Carrot Top's endless fields of carrots. Carrot Top was practicing some sort of weird drill with a hoe in her mouth; it looked like a martial arts kata to me. "Hoe-fu?" I asked her.
"Getting ready for the usual rabbit onslaught," she said.
"Better not tell Fluttershy," I said, laughing.
"Hey, Rainbow Dash," Dinky said to me.
"Hey, Dash, how did the trip go?" Scootaloo asked.
"It went great. Thanks for decorating my room, Scootaloo," I said to her. Actually, no thanks at all, but Rarity spent eight hours lecturing me on manners and when to be more subtle during the return trip.
Eight hours I will never get back.
I tried to sleep through them but Marcus kept poking me.
"Anyway, I need a partner to practice some maneuvers with, so I thought of you," I told Scootaloo. "If you can get out of prison, anyway."
"YEAH!" she said excitedly.
"It's okay," Carrot Top said. "Just bring her back to finish when you're done."
"Sorry, Dinky," Scootaloo said, not sorry at all and I can't blame her. Nothing against Dinky but who wants to pull weeds when they could be *flying*?
Now I just have to figure out how to approach her Mom without getting bitten again. Man, she is cranky.
****************
Something I hadn't really thought about was how I was going to actually build a monument; Celestia had kindly set aside some land in the Canterlot graveyard for us to move their remains to, though not much was left but a few bones, and some pieces of jewelry and a few magical things which had been frozen down there for so long.
I feel like I ought to make the monument but I can't really make anything unless it's made out of clouds and those won't endure. I had been so focused on getting here, I just didn't think about what came after.
"I can build you a monument," Apple Bloom told me. "You can help me make it."
I guess that means wood but that'll do for a start; I don't have enough money for stone anyway. Not yet.
This took days of work, but the good part was I could go see Soarin' in the evenings when Apple Bloom was too wiped out to go on. She really works like a maniac when she wants to work.
"Celestia could just have her people build you a fancy stone monument," Soarin' told me as we dinned at the Fifth Horseshoe, a really nice restaurant which allegedly has Time Pony cuisine. It is run by Time Ponies, who all have that same hourglass Cutie Mark, which seems weird to me.
Time Pony cuisine seems to revolve around what looks like gravel but tastes like broccoli, which is fine as I like broccoli. And cheese sauces and mushrooms and peas.
A couple came up to us and got Soarin's autograph. This is the *sixth* time tonight. If we go out in public, he gets swarmed.
But no one seems to know who I am, even though I am a heroine of Equestria!
"I want to do it myself," I told him. "I guess I'll pay for stone later, when I save up more money." Bad enough Celestia had to pay for the land it's going on. Land is *stupidly* expensive.
"Hi," Twilight said, startling me. She was here with West Wind. "Mind if we join you?"
"We're half done but sure," Soarin' said, then worked on scarfing down more food.
"Hello," West Wind said solemnly. He shook hooves with Soarin'; we'd already met. "Nice to meet you. What's your name? I'm West Wind; I work as a courier for Franich House."
Soarin' blinked and then he had a wide grin. "I'm Soarin', one of the Wonderbolts."
"They're... a racing team, right?" West Wind said hesitantly.
Twilight blinked and I stared. He's never heard of the Wonderbolts?
"And special agents for Celestia," Soarin' said.
"Dash hopes to be one of them one day," Twilight said to her coltfriend.
They both had menus which they began studying.
Soarin' and I glanced at each other; he knows enough. I don't know. I may be a Wonderbolt but... I can't really do that and do everything else I have to do. "I'm going to be teaching history this fall," I told West Wind. "But right now, I'm building a historical monument."
He was kind enough to let me ramble on about that and about the facility we'd visited earlier in the summer and the origins of ponykind; I couldn't tell if he was interested or polite but it all just spilled out in this endless tide of words.
By the time I finished, Soarin' was having dessert and their food had arrived. Our waitress, a yellow pony with a brown mane and the usual Time Pony cutie mark now said to me, "Well, that's the origin of the Equestrian Ponies, but that wasn't the only facility doing the research. Our Ancestors escaped from another one with the help of Khoronous and went back in time to before humanity and ended up helping to create them."
My eyes crossed. "Isn't that a paradox?"
"Wait, humans were created instead of developing from earlier human-like creatures?" Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow. "I'm pretty sure they and the Brute-Men developed from a common ancestor."
"Time is a complicated thing," our waitress said. "That may have originally been the case, but so many people have tried to interfere with that origin that it's kind of a mess now."
A tan pony wearing a hat with a red ribbon around the crown of it and a nice grey suit with a red tie now came up to her. "Don't confuse the customers," he said to her, then glanced at us.
"No, no, I'm really curious," Twilight said. "Please go on," she said excitedly.
"There are things best not lightly inquired into or talked about," he said but I could see now Twilight was now *really* curious. You know how she is.
Telling her not to be curious will make her *more* curious.
"We shouldn't stick our heads in," West Wind said to her. "If he doesn't want to talk about it."
"Table five, High Card," he said firmly to our waitress.
She sighed and galloped off, grumbling.
"I'm sorry, she likes to act like she knows all the secrets of the universe, but she's usually bluffing," the stallion boss said to us.
"I hear your pot calling you!" High Card shouted from across the room.
He just laughed, then said, "Anyway, enjoy your meal!"
Then he galloped off to another table.
"Now I wonder how much else has been tampered with by time travel," Twilight said thoughtfully.
"I thought it was impossible," West Wind said.
"You need an artifact of the Sphere of Time," Twilight said. "Going to have to study my giant hourglass more." She tapped her cheek thoughtfully.
"Well, I will be busy getting ready for my class, since this is pretty much done," I told them. Which is going to be a bunch of work but after seeing everything... I have to find some way to convey it to my students.
Hmm, if I could time travel, I could *show* them the important stuff. So it isn't just words on paper. "Let me know if you figure it out," I told her.
We hung out with them, then went off for a flight, while Twilight and West Wind went trotting. The Zeppelin is cool but man, we all about went crazy in there and I have to assume Cunning Thought was messing with us.
We were busy making out on a cloud when Luna showed up; Soarin' was embarrassed, but I'm shameless. "Hello, your highness," I said to her.
"Sorry to interrupt," she said. "I heard you had some trouble with Mother."
"Yeah, she's kind of mean." Of course, evil immortal, you don't expect *nice*.
Luna sighed. "She'd been leaving us alone but ever since Sweetie stumbled on her, she seems determined to stick her nose into everything. I think I finally calmed Ivan down so he won't do anything foolish."
We both grinned and she turned a little red and mumbled.
"The memorial is almost done," I told her. "I just... why didn't anyone do this before?" I asked.
"I could not have told you she existed," Luna said. "We may seem all knowing but we are not. And neither of us are really historians."
"Cunning Thought didn't think this was a good idea," I said.
"We would not have helped you go if that was the case," Luna said. "Mother lies constantly and instinctively tries to turn people on each other. You must remember that."
I still don't know why Rarity decided to dress her all up and be so nice to her.
"Now, now, if I lied *all* the time, my lies would never *work*," Cunning Thought said, still dressed up in the outfit Rarity put her in.
We all jumped. Where had she come from? She... please tell me wasn't hidden inside the cloud we were on!
"Mother," Luna said, sighing. "Haven't you done enough damage for one year?"
"No," she said cheerfully. "Dash, I just wanted to tell you that your monument looks very nice, but wood isn't very long-lasting, you know."
"It's a temporary until I can afford stone," I told her.
"If you like..."
I cut her off. "It's fine, I want to do this myself," I told her.
Soarin' frowned at her but kept his mouth shut, just glaring.
"Don't I look just lovely in this outfit?" Cunning Thought asked Luna, twirling in place.
"You look smashing, Mother," Luna said wearily.
"Is your boyfriend here?" Cunning Thought asked.
"I don't have a coltfriend!" Luna said frantically.
"Hmm, I can't feel the heat of his hateful gaze. I will have to show off my outfit to Celestia. If she's still awake," Cunning Thought said. "If I'm lucky, I'll catch her with her coltfriend! See you later, daughter!" And she dove down towards the city.
Luna watched her go, then sighed. "I had best make sure she doesn't cause any trouble. I will see you at the opening, if not before."
We waved and she dove down out of sight. Soarin' finally said, "That woman makes me nervous. Celestia's mother, that is."
"She's an ass," I told him. But she's... either she fakes it really well or I think she does care about her daughters. But it's hard to tell, she's so relentlessly cheerful, like Pinkie but without the whacky. Except when she suddenly gets mad.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" I heard Pinkie scream distantly.
I turned and saw she'd somehow used coatls... winged serpents... to tie other coatls to herself or gotten tangled up in a jumble of them or something... and was now being carried off by them. "Okay, I renounce my title as god-empress!" she wailed. "Let me down."
Time to save Pinkie.
Where did she get all those coatls, anyway?
******************
Only later, when I was having breakfast with Soarin' at his place, did I realize I could have asked Full Moon about who was right about Ghyr being toy-people or not.
It's just Pinkie being silly, I'm sure. Though I guess with all the planes of existence, there might be one where we're all toys for kids.
I imagined a plushie version of Soarin' and laughed.
"What's so funny?" he asked, looking up from his oatmeal and fruit.
"Just imagining you as a doll," I told him, laughing.
"Well, there are dolls of me," he said, embarrassed. "For kids. I can get you one if you want."
"Sure," I said. I can hug him at night when he's not there.
I had a Wonderbolt doll as a kid but I think it was just a generic doll, not any particular Wonderbolt. The team's been around for a long time. And I guess when we're all gone and I'm immortal...
It now hit me that one day, Soarin' will be dead and I'll go on without him, if I become an immortal. Maybe even if I fail, I might outlive him.
"What's wrong?" he asked, worried.
"Suddenly remembering that time goes on and everyone dies. I'll be fine once I'm full," I told him, then began eating.
I don't like Time. Will I be forgotten?
Not if I become an Immortal.
Except even Immortals can die; most of the ones from the far past are long gone and only a few Immortals survived... something.
Something so horrible they won't talk about it.
I suddenly could see Soarin' as an old stallion and then...
No, I don't want to think about it.
Dammit.
*******************
"It's entirely possible you'd break up in three weeks, anyway, though I hope you won't," Celestia told me a little later. She was on the way to a meeting but I was walking with her.
"I just suddenly... I never thought about this before," I said, feeling frustrated.
"To study history is to be aware how much we've lost," Celestia said to me sadly. "And how change is the only eternal thing in this world. But if you lock yourself away, that will only bring you pain. You have to find the beauty in change or go crazy." She swept a hoof grandly. "This palace is virtually completely different than when it was first built. One day, I will have to leave and it will change further, still."
"I don't want things to change," I mumbled. "Not in bad ways."
"Change will come, my little pony. You can ride the tide or it will pull you under and drown you. Don't dwell on it; you have things to do; focus on those and the people who love you." She patted my shoulder, then paused at a door. "I believe in you, Rainbow Dash. So you can believe in me, believing in you, if you can't believe in yourself." She had this oddly Pinkiesque look on her face.
"Is that a quote?" I asked.
"Something like that," she said, laughing softly, then kissed my forehead. "Anyway, I have to go help figure out how to deal with an outbreak of violet fungi down in the West Marech," she continued. "I will be at the opening of your memorial."
"Thanks, Princess Celestia," I said, turning a little red.
"You should talk to Octavia about playing at your opening," Celestia said. "I'm sure she could compose something appropriate."
Maybe I should ask Lyra too, though I know she's in the throes of writing a musical but she does know stuff about humans...
"Thank you," I said, then I bowed and went to go find Octavia.
*****************
My memorial is right next to the History of the Plateau museum, near the castle but not in it so everyone can get to it. I studied the Plateau museum a lot. It's not a very fancy building but we had limited time even with people helping us.
Apple Bloom works like a maniac; so do the rest of the Crusaders if they *want* to help. I had ended up having to accept some money from Celestia to help pay for more workers; the building is going to be simple but it's still too much for me and the Crusaders and my friends all have stuff that they need to catch up on. Soarin' helps when he can, but he's busy too; at least I can see him more with us in Canterlot.
I was pretty surprised when I heard someone yelp at the entrance. Apple Bloom said, "Hah! Intruder captured!"
"Apple Bloom, don't trap the entrance!" I told her. This whole place would lock up all future visitors if I didn't stop her.
I feel bad for her future coltfriends.
I flew over and to my surprise, a dun coated unicorn pony hung from the ceiling in a net trap; she had a long straight yellow mane and brown eyes. She wore four brown hoof boots, a blue shirt, black pants, and a long white coat. You couldn't see her Cutie Mark but her companion had one.
Her companion, flying over her, was a red-coated Pegasus with a short blond mane and a cutie mark of herself executing a fancy aerial turn. She was gnawing on the trap. "This is why Pegasi are the best ponies," she said chidingly to the unicorn.
"You are the best pony," the unicorn said, sounding embarrassed.
My brain registered. It was Barrel Roll! And this must be Dr. Iricia Morin in pony form for some reason.
They came to see me! I was so thrilled I could hardly breathe.
"Hold on, Apple Bloom, release the net trap!" I shouted.
Apple Bloom now touched a wall stud and the trap released and I caught Dr. Iricia before she could splat.
"Sorry, Apple Bloom is a great architect but she's training under a dungeon master," I said apologetically.
"Uncle K understands I am a big pony now," she said proudly.
"Please show me everything," Dr. Iricia said warmly to me. "I am flattered you went to all this effort."
"How could I not?" I said; how could she not see it as a big deal?
She moved fluidly once not bound; you'd only notice she wasn't normally a pony by all the clothing she wore. I guess she's done this enough times to be used to it.
I showed them around; keeping Barrel Roll from accidentally bumping things was a full time job. I guess she's used to the skies and it is kind of crowded in here.
But land... How can anyone afford land when you could drink alcohol all day until you died for the cost of one little bit of land?
Kids, don't try that at home, by the way.
Having her here was a huge help and I had a billion questions for her. Dinky was kind enough to act as secretary for me, writing things down.
I noticed Barrel Roll got really sad when we reached the pegasi zone; I had pictures as best I could, images from the spheres, of the various pegasi and she filled me in on all of them but it clearly made her a little sad to think of them.
Then it hit me. "I'm sorry, I didn't even think about... I guess you never saw them again."
"I gave my life for them to live," Barrel Roll said, studying them carefully. Her head hung down some. "It's a mother's duty."
Dr. Iricia nodded and I now realized...
"Did you ever get to see your children again?" I asked softly.
"No," she said and I grimaced. "But they must have reincarnated many, many times by now. It is not easy, sometimes. I will never forget them, but even if I found them now, they are not who they were."
"Couldn't you get someone from the Sphere of Time to help you go see them?" Dinky asked, frowning.
"Too much risk of changing things, time travel should not be done just to make yourself feel better," Dr. Iricia said sadly, and Dinky grimaced, but didn't comment.
"Anyway, I look to the future," Barrel Roll said. "I think most pegasi are like that."
I am, but now I can't help but notice things I never used to.
I wonder... Soarin'...
I stared at the floor. No, I can't just... There has to be a way even if I don't know what.
Dr. Iricia patted my shoulder. "It's okay," she said. "Don't let us old people get you down."
She didn't actually look old; she could have easily been my age or Twilight's.
"You and Barrel Roll should go for a good fly; I'll help your friends work," Dr. Iricia said to me.
"I dunno if she can keep up with me," Barrel Roll said.
Oh, it is ON.
********************
I easily outpaced her on the first race; I am hella fast and she's clearly not been practicing for power all these years. But she's really maneuverable and the obstacle course race, I lost to my frustration.
Also, the stupid bell pullers pulled the bell in the clocktower and I got rung!
When my head stopped ringing, we landed on a convenient cloud. "Did your generation walk on clouds?" I asked her. She must have gotten a cutie mark later.
"We're tied to elemental air," she said. "So yes. Each of the five kinds of us were based on one of the elements." She frowned. "Including Entropy. I think making Entropy ponies was a *big* mistake but the Blackmoorians thought they knew everything, controlled everything and could just do anything without consequences." She sighed and rolled onto her back. "They just rushed into things without thinking about consequences."
Okay, universe, I get it! Let's move on.
"So what do you guys do for Full Moon?" I asked curiously.
"Get in trouble," she said, grinning and I laughed. "Mostly run around the cosmos dealing with problems that mortals can't handle but are too common to call in full blown immortals. Iricia and I tend to be the leaders because we're older than the boss' other titans. She's the brain and I'm the brawn. Dr. Moon has a couple of other titans, though sometimes we work with other people's titans." She paused. "I'm not sure how much of it I can talk about."
But she launched into a long story about the time she had a race with the letter H. Too long to repeat here, but we traded stories for a while before we had to go back.
*****************
They both had to go but I was glad to have seen them and I expect I'll see them again in the future. I hope.
So we worked our butts off and got everything set up for the big day.
On Opening Day, I was nervous but hopeful. We had a moderate crowd of curious ponies as I paced in my fancy orange dress Rarity forced me to wear, even though she and Marcus and Applejack *are not here yet*.
And Fluttershy had turned herself into a human for no apparent reason. Rarity had dressed her up in this fancy six layer Blackmoor style dress. I can't imagine how she's not overheating in it. But she was busy going around talking to the kids whose parents had dragged them here.
Octavia, Lyra, and some friends of theirs were busy playing what Twilight claims is Blackmoorian music; it was kind of spooky but seemed to go over well. I'd hoped for more people but maybe they're late.
Then, to my surprise, Apple Blossom entered, leading a herd of fancily dressed ponies who looked kind of like her. Her relatives... well, Applejack's relatives but they would be her relatives if she wasn't a clone... man, I wonder if Rainbow Crash is coming. I did send her an invitation; she has to see how cool my memorial is!
*FLASH*, Dawn Gleaming, Sammy, and Rainbow Crash landed *on me*. "HEY!" I shouted.
"Don't run into magical flashes," Dawn Gleaming said irritably as she got up.
"You landed *on me*," I said urgently.
"Piffle, my aim is flawless, especially with Rainbow backing me up," she said, then helped Sammy up.
"So you're saying you meant to land on Dash," Twilight said, frowning at Dawn Gleaming.
She and Dawn Gleaming glared at each other, then Crash said, "My aim is per... hey, chips!"
I had to stop her eating all the potato chips I'd bought. Fortunately, I bought a *lot*, as I expected a good crowd and, well, everyone scarfs as much free food as they can, right? It's how parties work.
Pinkie also made some; they've got 'astral spices', which seems to mean 'cream and onion' flavor. But that's good too.
"Leave some for the other guests," I told her. "Don't be a glutton."
Dawn Gleaming now went with Sammy to mill around looking at everything; she kept dictating notes to him for some reason.
Where is Rarity?
She'd better not be dressing up Cunning Thought to come to my grand opening!
Apple Blossom swept up to me. "This is Rainbow Dash, Aunt Orange," she said cheerfully. She introduced me to a ton of Orange themed ponies, who showered me with bottles of orange brandy, perfume, cookbooks, brand hats, and even a tie with oranges on it, which might look good on Soarin'. I have never been so thoroughly ad-blitzed in my life.
"It's a pleasure to meet you all," I said, shaking hooves until my hooves hurt. But I can be mannerly if I want to be. And this is a fancy occasion.
"Apple Blossom says you are a historian and archeologist," Aunt Orange said to me once the blitz was over.
Oh wow, I am. Just like Daring Doo!
I felt this sudden huge surge of confidence. "Why yes, I am," I said to her. It's weird, I just never... Those books are so *awesome*. "Here, let me show you everything."
I was busy giving my spiel as a horde of orange themed ponies followed me, when a huge horde of snobby looking unicorns flooded in the doors. You could probably rebuild this place in marble with what they spent on their clothing; they looked generally unimpressed, though I could now see Rarity and Marcus in stallion form, herding them. And Applejack, all dressed up like Apple Blossom. I laughed at that.
And hey, here's all her relatives she snubbed to go back to Ponyville.
In my mind, I could see the entire memorial burning and Canterlot falling off the cliff and plunging down into the countryside. And into Lower Canterlot. We're in Middle Canterlot, which is halfway up the cliff; there's an Upper Canterlot on top of the plateau also.
Please, no apocalypse.
Now a group of Darokinian Pegasi, all wearing various houses' colors, came crowding in behind the unicorns, leading to a traffic jam. I could make out Twilight's coltfriend leading them in and felt a little embarrassed. Thanks, Twilight.
Then the junior dragons; I wouldn't have thought the city had so many, plus various unicorns, mostly less impressive than Rarity's group.
And the Wonderbolts. And a bunch of Pony Druids. And I just... I felt so happy. Whatever people may think of the past, they need to know.
And my friends had gone to a lot of effort to make my thing a success.
Inevitably, Applejack ended up face to face with her Manehattan kin, though I tried to keep them apart. Apple Blossom had tried to help me but it was like someone was conspiring against us and this place just isn't all that big.
"Why, Applejack, it's been so long," her Aunt Orange said. "You look wonderful in that dress."
Applejack shifted uncomfortably on her hooves. "Thanks, auntie, Rarity made it for me."
Apple Blossom now nudged her subtly in several ways, causing Applejack to adjust how she stood. A posture thing, I guess.
"You look wonderful," Aunt Orange said weakly. "I hope your farm is going well."
"The apples are doing righ...," Applejack paused, closed her eyes, then said smoothly, "We will have a fine apple crop this year. It's close to time for the zapapples to come in, if we get any. When the weather changes, some of them will transform, as you know," she continued, her voice sounding all cultured. "Apple Bloom helped to build this place; she got her cutie mark as a builder." Applejack now described it and talked about the Moonraker.
"I haven't seen her in so long. Is she here?" Aunt Orange asked.
Applejack turned and finally spotted the Crusaders; they were all showing Belcadizians around, dressed up in Belcadizian style clothing themselves.
"There we go," I said, pointing her out.
"You should come visit us some time," Aunt Orange said; I couldn't tell if she meant it or was being formal.
"I reck... I should," Applejack said softly. "Thank you for coming all this way."
"Apple Blossom insisted and I see the elites of Canterlot are here." For a moment, Aunt Orange sounded just like Rarity. "Oh good, Fancy Pants, just the stallion I need to talk to. I know he's looking for some new drinks for his parties." She looked gleeful and was about to rub her hooves together when her husband nudged her gently.
"I will make contact," Apple Blossom told her, then dragged me along for some reason; I felt bad leaving Applejack with the sharks.
"Is that wise?" I glanced back at AJ and her relatives.
"They haven't even talked in a decade," Apple Blossom said softly. "I had a hard time even talking them into coming."
"It was nice of you to come but if they riot..." I said.
"They won't get violent but it was time to rip off the scab, I think," Apple Blossom said softly. Then she changed and got the smile again; the one that says 'I am awesome'. I studied it; given I am awesome, I need to be able to do that.
"Rarity, darling, it's so good to see you again," Apple Blossom said to Rarity, who was busy trying to tell a bunch of snooty unicorns about the model of the research center.
"Apple Blossom, you look smashing," Rarity said, her accent even more accenty than usual.
They praised each other for several minutes, then they both introduced me to roughly three billion unicorns and I took over explaining everything while Apple Blossom seduced Fancy Pants into ordering a lot of orange drinks for his next party. Not literal physical seduction but you know what I mean. Though his skinny pale consort glared at Apple Blossom the whole time.
And once he ordered... everyone wanted some.
More people were flooding into the memorial and I began to suspect I would be really tired tonight.
***************
I was fairly tired but happy when a dozen angry ponies in blue robes strode in; half had Luna's cutie mark on their robes, the other half had Celestia's sun. They began haranguing the crowd about how this was all lies.
I bet Cunning Thought sent them.
I strode over and said, "I'm Rainbow Dash and all of this is true."
"Ponies were not made by machines in a factory!," one of them said angrily; she had a long blue wavy mane and a dark green coat with red eyes. She had hoof-boots like Celestia's but done in copper. "Everyone knows Celestia and Luna created us!"
"That's not true at all; they were born of a Pony father and could hardly have created their own father," I said, trying not to yell at them. Some lunatic cult, I guess.
"Everyone knows their mother was an Immortal and their father Odin's son," the pony said haughtily.
Odin's SON? I'm pretty sure Sleipnir... no wait, Sleipnir is the brother... and now I forget their father.
Which I should know but he has a weird name.
"You are quite incorrect," Dawn Gleaming said. "The Book of the Sun and the Moon is nothing more than the ignorant blathering of a lunatic mind." She sounded quite contemptuous and I wondered when she'd come up.
The what?
I wanted to avoid a fight but I'm only good at causing fights. But I don't want anything to get broken.
Fluttershy, she's good at avoiding violence. I summoned her over by desperate wing-flapping.
She approached and a wave of daisy smell flooded over me. I think she over did it on perfume. The robe ponies' eyes all crossed.
"Priestess Goldenhair, I am Fluttershy of the Equestrian Druids, a pleasure to meet you," Fluttershy said with her musical voice, shaking hand-to-hoof with her.
"Any relation to..." one of Goldenhair's flunkies asked eagerly.
Wait, her hair isn't gold, it's BLUE.
I rubbed my eyes just to be sure.
"I am a human and she is a pony, so no," Fluttershy said. "Just a coincidence."
Goldenhair studied her curiously. "What an odd outfit."
"It's worn by Blackmoorian researchers," Fluttershy said. "I wanted to help out with my friend Dashie's premiere. Please don't run around shouting, I want everything to be just right for her big night."
"But she..." Goldenhair began.
"She's a...," Dawn Gleaming began.
"You can fight any time; but this is a night to remember the past and celebrate our present. Doesn't Celestia say we should all get along and be kind to each other?" Fluttershy said gently.
"Yes," Goldenhair said. "But she..."
"Shouting never persuades anyone," Fluttershy said. "Now, let me show you the religious exhibit."
She soon had them under her thumb, just like her animals and I smiled a little. You're a good friend, Fluttershy.
I jumped when Crash suddenly was next to me. "Hey," Crash said, spewing crumbs.
Onto my nice dress, so I tried to brush them off. "Enjoying it?" I asked.
"Mom's coming," Crash said, wincing.
MOM.
It took eight ponies to drag me out of the closet when she got here.
Then Rarity distracted her until Applejack of all people got me fixed back up with Apple Blossom's help. It was mostly Apple Blossom.
How did Mom know to come????
I saw Gilda's father, Anton, before I saw Mom as I hesitantly let them herd me towards Mom. He came all the way from Prance? Is Gilda here? Anton was busy talking to one of Rarity's friends, one of the snooty unicorns, but he now saw me and eyed me in that Griffon way, the one that probably used to mean 'I am going to eat you' but now just means 'I hold you in disdain'. Why is he even here if he's mad at me?
Is Gilda here?
I felt twice as nervous now.
Anton wore a top hat, but wasn't wearing his monocle, which I think is silly; he did have a nice brown suit on, though.
Our path came close to Anton, who said, "Mselle Dash, your dress is very nice." He has this warm, cultured voice and I have to admit that maybe I kind of like it.
Soarin' would sound awesome if he sounded like that.
He's here, somewhere, but this place is *so full*. I saw Spitfire, for a moment, talking to Falling Lightning, another Wonderbolt; he once outraced a lightning bolt! *That* is awesome.
But they were hedged in by admirers and I was being herded and Anton wanted to talk to me.
"Thank you, Anton," I said, doing my best to bow and fake culture. "I am very grateful you came to see the opening of my memorial."
"I had not known you took an interest in history," he said amiably and I wondered why he'd looked mad at me earlier.
"I had some adventures and read some books which convinced me there were things we need to remember but have forgotten," I told him excitedly. Then I kind of rambled on about the research center and all the people there.
It's like I was there for me now; seeing all those globes, I know more about some of these people than I do a lot of ponies in Ponyville.
He watched; it's hard to read Griffon expressions because they have different facial muscles and also any time you talk to one, part of your brain is reminding you they used to eat horses.
But they're civilized now, though I'm not sure why.
"We have a museum like this about our ancestors," he said softly, looking around. "Not everyone took it well; they wanted to believe we were created by Vanya as noble warsteeds for her elite warriors."
"Gilda told me that story," I told him. About how Vanya had trained eagles but they weren't big enough to ride and trained lions but her foes escaped by flying. So she bred them together... somehow... and got griffons, who were as mighty as a lion and flew as high as an eagle and then no one could escape her and her knights.
Part of my brain says chickens were somehow involved but I was probably drunk at the time when I heard the story.
"I tried to get her to come but I know you two fell out," he continued, not quite looking me in the face, but studying my left shoulder; I glanced at it but it was still just a shoulder with a dress over it.
Now I shuffled uncomfortably on my hooves. "Is she okay? I mean, I know she must get into trouble but I hope it's not too much trouble."
"Herr Franz Lowenroth, Baron of Adlerturm now employs her as a bodyguard," he said. "As I understand, he's a wizard but with an interest in hunting and animal magics. She writes more than she used to." He paused. "Is there some reason she would be in trouble? Beyond the usual?"
I froze, transfixed by that one-eyed stare thing Griffons do when they want to scare the shit out of you. "I just had a bad feeling," I mumbled.
He sighed and settled back on his rear haunches. Then he blinked. "You and your friends are all quite large."
"I was too awesome for a small body to hold," I said, laughing and nervous at once; I'm not sure how much I can tell; I had my Element but I wasn't wearing it because they're supposed to be secret; it was hidden inside my outfit.
"Well, I see your handlers are impatient, so I will let you go," he said.
'Handlers'.
I feel weird.
"It was very gracious of you to come," I told him.
"You should write your mother more often; she worries about you," he said sternly. "She made sure I came."
But who told Mom?
Probably Cunning Thought in a final petty stroke at me for beating her.
Punk!
I mumbled about letters and let everyone push me away.
Then I saw somehow Mom had found Crash and was looming over her, lecturing her. Mom's not any taller than I... used to be. But she wears these high-heeled hoof-boots and likes to stand very straight and proud. Mom's a very light blue and her mane is long and fancy and styled like Rarity's, but it's the same color as mine. She was wearing a long three-layered orange dress which flowed in all directions; I don't know how she moved in it without stepping on it and falling down; only my super-nimbleness lets me move in this outfit Rarity made for me and it's only one layer.
"Junior, how can you come to your own premiere without even wearing ANYTHING?" she was lecturing Crash. "You didn't even brush your mane!"
"Mom, I...," Crash began; she looked really shaken up. Especially when Mom pounced on her and pinned her down and began brushing out her mane.
"Now, look at this fine young lady coming to say hello to you," Mom said, pointing at me. "Tall, elegant, graceful, and not slobbed out at an event where *everypony who is anypony in Equestria* will see her. And her face isn't covered with crumbs and she doesn't smell like cider, either!"
That's because I haven't had a chance to eat and I just had a quick sip of some cider, but I've been wall-to-wall schmoozing since the start of this.
Only when I got a few feet closer did I realize that *Mom didn't recognize me*. WHAT?
"Mom, you're embarrassing me in front of the entire universe," Crash said, squirming. "I can brush my own mane!"
"I've seen little evidence of that," she said chidingly.
I would be laughing my ass off if I wasn't now reminded I kind of still haven't told Mom about the twin thing. Clone thing. You know what I mean.
Ahahah.
I strode up trying to be graceful, my friends trailing after me. "Hey, Mom, I see you found my twin sister. This is Rainbow Crash."
Mom froze, studied Crash, then me, then her eyes widened as she looked at all my friends and then everyone else and all the ponies watching her. "Rainbow Dash the Second, what have you done this time?" she said sternly to me.
"The second?" Twilight said curiously. I guess I had never actually said Mom's name. I'm technically Rainbow Dash the Second but I want to be remembered for me, not because my parents couldn't be bothered to think of a new name!
I don't want to just be some cheap copy of my Mom.
I saw Crash staring at the floor and suddenly felt terrible for her.
"Your mother is an elegant pony," Rarity said approvingly.
The world will now end, I know it. I'll never be out of a dress, again.
"I was so awesome, even this body couldn't hold it and I split off another me," I said. It was intended as a joke, but Mother now buried her face in her hooves.
"Junior, playing around with magical items is unwise," she told me sternly.
Crash had just curled up in a ball and looked miserable; being reminded you were made in... I'm not sure what Keraptis' shadow creature clone machine things look like. It can't be a happy memory.
I took a deep breathe and let it out. "Crash is a magical clone of me but she's a person and she remembers everything I did up to when she was made. So she's your daughter too and I want you to treat her like that. And we're both big ponies now and she works for an *immortal* so you should give us some respect." I waved my hoof around at everything. "I can't be the daughter you wanted because Rarity already existed."
Rarity blinked and studied me curiously.
"She's a bit of a lazy idiot but so am I," I continued. "We can't be who you dreamed of us being. We're just the we who is." That did not come out right at all. "And you can thank my friend Rarity for my outfit. She's a designer and makes all our best clothing."
Rarity now did that little 'I am Rarity, the best dressed, prettiest pony who all the stallions want' strut. You know the one. She was wearing a purple dress with golden topazes set into it like stars and a crown. Because in her heart, she's a pretty princess.
She's pretty much Mom's ideal of her perfect daughter.
Marcus stood by her; he's in stallion form, all dressed up in a navy suit and looking pretty good. Not as good as Soarin' but who can match him?
There was a shimmer of light and then a flash and Dawn Gleaming appeared, pulling Crash out of Mom's grip and landing her on her feet. "Rainbow Crash is my friend and a valued member of our team which serves the all-powerful and wise Princess Marjorie." She glared defiantly at Mom. "If she didn't look a little rumpled, we'd mistake her for that grandstander, Rainbow Dash."
I am not a grandstander, I am just *that awesome*.
My father now came out of the press of the crowd; he's a very dark blue with a long blond mane; he wore a very light blue suit that I now realized basically matched Mom's skin tone. He also wears glasses and is rather an egghead. "Ahh, you're Dawn Gleaming, who wrote the article on comet-borne monster infestations in the latest Celestial Quarterly?" he asked.
The what in the what on what?
She smiled brightly. "Yes, it's my first publication," she said. "Studying Alphatian comet records finally enabled me to trace the causes of the 1180 and 1232 monster infestations in Haven and the causes of the Haunted Marshes. That's in the Alphatian calendar which counts from Landfall, of course."
"Of course," father said. "I am Dr. Star Chaser, Rainbow's father, and it's a pleasure to meet you." They shook hooves and she practically squeed.
"You wrote _Volume Three of the Condensed History of Atmospheric Irregularities over Brun and the Alphatian Islands_, right?" Dawn Gleaming asked excitedly.
"Wait, Star Chaser is your *father*?" Twilight said to me, stunned.
This is why I never mention my parents, people get expectations. That I'm going to be *them* and not *me*.
Also, only they would get this happy over a book like that.
Mom stared at me, then sighed. "Dash, I just want what's best for you."
"And that's something *we* decide," I told her, standing firm as my legs tried to shake.
Crash now stood by me and nodded. "We'd write more if all your letters weren't about how disappointed you are that we aren't you," she said, then stared at the floor, sagging.
Mom grimaced, then sighed. "Crash, come here."
"I do..."
"COME HERE." Mom gave her the stare and she came hither.
She gently embraced Crash around the head and shoulders. "I always wanted another daughter," she said softly, brushing away... had Crash somehow gotten *more* crumbs on her?
Crash began crying on her shoulder and now I wanted to die of embarrassment. Fluttershy came up and hugged her gently too.
Dad, Twilight, Marcus, Sammy, Spike, Spikey, some griffon I don't even know, three other unicorns, Dawn Gleaming, and some elf were now all embroiled in complicated argument about whether or not monsters could fall from comets onto the land and somehow make swamps.
I think.
Wouldn't they all splat pretty hard unless they could fly?
Apple Blossom passed me a small bottle and I chugged down something orangey and alcoholic and then she carefully wiped my mouth with a handkerchief. Softly, she said, "Parents can be difficult."
"I know," I whispered back.
"At least you have some to argue with," AJ said sadly, then she and Apple Blossom both stared off at one of the exhibits of a pony planting an apple tree. It was supposed to be Leaf Dancer but it looked suspiciously like Apple Bloom, I now realized.
If she was an adult with a slightly longer...
Did Apple Bloom do Leaf Blossom as her mother?
Now I couldn't stop staring and wondering.
Crash now looked like she wanted to die as Mom gently wiped her face. "None of that matters," Mom said kindly to her. "You are my daughter, so stand proud because we are the best ponies in Equestria."
She glanced at Dad, then gently kicked him in the ass.
He started, looked at her, and Mom gestured my way with her head.
Father now apologized to everyone around him and strode over to me, then smiled at me. "I'm glad to see you doing something constructive," he said to me.
"I work very hard," I told him irritably. "Being an athlete is work too."
"The body fades before the mind," he said sternly, but then relaxed again. "Why don't you show us around? I'm not familiar with the Blackmoor period, so I need a knowledgeable guide like you. You know more about it than I do."
"Okay, Dad," I said to him. Being able to show off intellectual stuff to him was, really, kind of cool.
Wow, I know something Dad doesn't. That's *new*.
A good kind of new.
**************
"You didn't tell me your parents live in Prance! Your mother is so fashionable!," Rarity said and ranted about this while I got a snack and a drink; I was very tired but I still had guests and I have shown people around here a billion times.
I don't know how museum operators avoid dying of exhaustion. I hired someone Twilight recommended to run this place for me since it's in Canterlot and I have other duties. But maybe I should have hired an Earth pony who wouldn't get tired easily instead of one of her classmates from Unicorn School.
I also hope I can afford to keep it open even with Celestia helping.
I may need to go on a dungeon raid with Marcus to fund it or something.
"She may forget I exist now," I mumbled to Rarity.
"What?" Rarity said in confusion.
"You're everything she ever wanted in a daughter, but she got me. And Twilight's probably Dad's ideal daughter," I said, sighing. The egghead brigade was over by the exhibit of the genetic thing machine; they were arguing over ducks and cows or something. Did someone actually make a duck-cow and why?
It's not the real machine, just a model; Celestia's people are studying the real thing but Apple Bloom made a really convincing fake.
It had better be a fake.
Crash was in a very simple red dress now which I am guessing someone made on the spot or maybe Mom just carries dress... of course Mom has emergency dresses for fashion disasters.
"Your mother and I made it for her," Rarity said, following my gaze. "I had my kit but no material; she had some cloth samples but not her kit. A match made in heaven, though I could have done more if I had been ready. There's really no excuse for me not being ready to sew at a moment's notice."
I sighed and had more cider.
"Don't drink from the bowl, Dash," Rarity said chidingly. "And your mother loves you very much and is very sad you never write."
"She doesn't write much either," I grumbled.
I could see Twilight's parents there, pontificating and talking to Dawn Gleaming and Twilight. They're probably happy to have two of Twilight.
"I know, she has her fashion empire to oversee," Rarity said, clearly envious. "Apple Blossom was telling me you helped her get a contract with Fancy Pants for her company; she was quite grateful."
She did the work, I was just an excuse. "Better give me your element since I'm so generous," I teased her.
"This place could do with some fancying up but I am very proud of you," Rarity said warmly. "You've done something great."
"It's a start," I told her. "I don't know where I am going to get the money to keep paying for it, though." Running Rarity's business... she must be as much of a math genius as Twilight. I talked to an accountant Celestia recommended and my brain glazed over in three minutes and he was trying to keep it simple.
This is how we ended up in the office of the place with her going over the numbers with me and recommending things, like a souvenir shop. Mother came in and joined us and she was, as always, full of ideas.
They were just useful this time.
"And of course, you can do special exhibits, get various scholarly institutions to help sponsor you and you then help them by exposing their work to the public view," Mother concluded. "I know students at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns do all sorts of research projects and the professors as well."
They really had a lot of good advice. I just hadn't thought about all the complicated parts of this before I built it.
I guess I do rush into things.
"So how did you get so big?" Mother asked me curiously.
"We're all just so awesome, our bodies had to get bigger to hold it," I told her.
"Magical side-effects," Rarity said.
I can't talk about our quests. So I don't know what to tell Mom. "It comes from working for Celestia," I told her.
Mom gave me the Mom look. The one that says 'I know you're not telling me something.'
"It's sealed to the Crown," Rarity quickly said.
"It's because Dash is really a toy and now they need a new model to sell!" Pinkie said, sticking her head into the office.
Is she *still* on that?
Mom looked thoughtful in a way which now made me worry, especially when Rarity got the same look.
****************
They had a set of working model plushies by the time the opening party was over; they work fast, especially since they roped Clarity into it. I hadn't even realized she was here.
Now I wonder if Marjorie is around here, but I didn't see her.
Soarin' kissed me in front of the Wonderbolts, who cheered and I turned red. "We're going to go flying for fun," he said. "You game?"
"YEAH!" I said and soon I was streaking across the sky, happy as a lark.
Spitfire and I did a double spiral together as the others cheered; she was trailing fire and I regretted I had nothing to trail. Unless I did a rainboom but it was night and I'd probably wake up every little kid in the city.
Then Soarin' and I got some clouds and did some sky spelling, shaping them to spell out 'Wonderbolts Rule' in huge letters, then he got some of Rainmaker's special stuff and threw it on the clouds; they changed colors to form a rainbow and I turned a little red and smiled.
Rainmaker does their special effects; he's pretty cool.
Then we went to the Landfall Cafe; it has Alphatian style food and they have their own reserved room! So Soarin' and I got to eat in peace with just the rest of his team and their coltfriends and fillyfriends, most of whom I'd never met.
"What's with your friend thinking everyone in Gear is a toy?" Rainmaker asked me. He's got a dark green coat and blue and white streaked mane, cut pretty short and curly so it looks like a cloud on his head.
"Pinkie... sometimes she's a genius and sometimes she's kind of crazy. She's a bit of a visionary in all senses," I told him. "Sometimes it's really insightful and sometimes she acts like there's people constantly watching us."
"We're the Wonderbolts, people *are* constantly watching us," Thunderhead, Rainmaker's fillyfriend, said. She's pink with a striped white and green mane, long and flowing and very wavy. She's an actual Wonderbolt; most of them don't date each other. Soarin' says it gets messy if something goes wrong.
I can totally see that. Every time Rainmaker glanced at our waitress, Thunderhead twitched.
"I like people looking at me," Leo said. He's a tawny gold with a yellow mane; he's dating Windmachine. He studied me. "I wouldn't have expected to see Soarin' dating a brainiac," he said.
Me? A brainiac?
"Dash is very smart," Soarin' said proudly.
"I've got it all," I said proudly. "And the best coltfriend in Equestria."
"Just don't be too loud tonight," Thunderhead said amiably.
EEEEEE.
*******************
I wished I could stay longer but after staying overnight with Soarin', I had to head back home after a quick consultation with my new museum runner and a few minutes to cry over the shattered remains of my bank account.
I really should have thought about the cost of it all.
There were drunken, unconscious weatherponies still crashed out or moaning about hangovers all over my house when I got home.
"CRASH!" I shouted.
"Hey, you'd best not come in your bedroom for at least five minutes," she shouted. "The floor won't be sticky then."
It's not the first time this place has been like this but it *is* the first time it happened *without me*.
I eventually chased everyone out, made Crash help and Fluttershy came to help me get it back to where it didn't smell weird and my hooves didn't stick to anything.
"Don't throw parties in my house without inviting me," I told Crash sternly.
She stuck her tongue out at me, then said, "Your friends are cool," softly.
"Yeah, we have a good crew," I told her.
She glanced nervously at Fluttershy, who smiled at her, which made her more nervous. "Anyway, I'd best get back home. We're going to the Wild Coast in order to investigate another attack on a dragon or something," Crash said, waving a hoof dismissively. "By the way, if anyone suggests going to Old Thonia... kick their ass for me. I *hate* that place so much!"
"But Old Thonia has the prettiest snails," Fluttershy said.
Crash, not looking at her, said, "They are on fire and they spit acid and read your mind and fill it with thoughts about how tasty you will be." She shuddered.
"Not the big ones, the little cute ones," Fluttershy said. "The swamps are lovely in spring time."
"Psychic frog-men with temples that turn into giant murderous golems," Crash said dolefully.
"But you kicked their ass, right?" I said.
"Oh, I kicked their ass, but Cruisin' was checking out every pony in sight," she said dolefully. "I don't know what I'm going to do," she continued, sounding grim.
"Kick his ass if he's an ass," I said.
"Oh dear, some guys are like that. Does he initiate combat with other men to try to take their mates?" Fluttershy asked.
I'm starting to think the reason Fluttershy never has a coltfriend is that she has some weird ideas about romance.
Rainbow Crash began to wail, and now Fluttershy looked mortified. So I shook her shoulders. "Pull it together," I told her. "If he wanders around on you, kick his ass."
"I can't kick my coltfriend's ass," Crash said, then sighed. "Maybe it's not meant to be, I mean we just... it's because you and Soarin'..."
Maybe it isn't meant to be.
But stuff that, we are awesome and we *decide*.
"Do you want him?" I asked.
"I was made to want him," she mumbled to my hooves as she sat on her haunches.
"I suppose he is the only stallion there," Fluttershy said thoughtfully. "That may be triggering overconfidence due to a lack of challengers."
"That's not an excuse. I was made with wings but I *choose* to fly," I told her. "Secondguessing myself isn't in my nature so it shouldn't be in yours, either. Get up!"
She got up, wobbling.
"Be confident! There's nothing a Dash can't do," I told her. "Decide what you want and go for it. That's our way."
"Get some other stallions to join your team, so he has competition and can't take you for granted," Fluttershy said.
That could be tricky, given the circumstances of their creation.
Crash closed her eyes, then opened them, looking stronger. I was relieved. "Thanks, Dash. Flu... Fluttershy. I'd best get going. Wherever exactly we're going. See ya!"
And then she took off.
Have a good adventure, Sister, I thought.
"You should write your mother a nice letter," Fluttershy said to me.
"I just saw her yesterday," I told Fluttershy, who gave me the 'you are disappoint' look.
With her help, I wrote Mom a long letter about everything. Maybe we'll get on better in the future. I think...
She really is proud of me.
I don't even know how to live with a Mom who is proud of me.
But I feel proud of me too. This is just a beginning but it's a good beginning. But one little memorial museum isn't enough. People have to know. They have to remember.
Fluttershy and I laid out on my roof, soaking up sun. "Well, now I can relax a little."
"Don't you have training with Scootaloo?," Fluttershy said.
A teacher's work is never over.
Me, a *teacher*. I guess I am growing up.
But that's not a bad thing.
The End. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Short Story 3: Lyra Heartstrings of Vanya | Bon-Bon's Tale:
I found Lyra in the backyard, rearing up on her hind legs, holding her forelegs up towards Vanya in the sky; Vanya is one of the planets, where one of her favorite book series is set. I tried to read one of them but it was too ridiculous.
"Lyra, no matter how many times you try, you won't be wooshed up into the sky to visit Vanya and save the potato people from the desert raiders, you know," I told her flatly. "And if you were, I'd be quite cross."
Lyra wants excitement and I want peace and quiet. Now, anyway. I tried adventure... sort of adventure, but I'm too old to be running around getting in trouble. I guess I've turned into my mother, like she told me.
Though she still nags me about grandchildren.
I helped save Equestria and she nags me about grandchildren.
That's a mother for you.
"They're not potato people," Lyra said irritably, then sighed. "I'm trying to write a song for the Running of the Leaves and it's just... there's a million songs about it and I can't figure out anything original." Lyra now flopped down in the grass on her side, legs splayed, and I settled down next to her. "I mean, I know at least twenty songs but I wanted to open it with something that everyone hasn't heard so many times their heads will explode from boredom."
Lyra would be long dead if that could happen. That being said, a new song would be nice. "What do you have? I can try and help you," I told her.
She idly ate a chunk of the lawn. She does that when she's frustrated. She chewed slowly and finally swallowed. "It's all junk. Pedestrian junk that any pony at all could produce."
She always says this; Lyra expects every song to be perfect gold and it's usually silver. See, if I made a song, it would be brass at best.
"Try me," I told her. "Let me decide."
She rose to her hooves and summoned her lyre with a flourish. Swirls of green energy surrounded it and she began to sing, accompanying herself with the lyre.
o/~ Running in the leaves
o/~ Ain't never been my idea of gettin' it on
o/~ But my job demands that you make new songs
o/~ Before the snows can come.
"Lyra, is this a song about the running of the leaves or about how you can't come up with a good new song for it?" I asked her.
She slumped. "Pretty much."
"Hey, nice song!" Dinky said cheerfully, trotting into our yard. She concentrated and scrolls flew over to us, marked with a blue dragon, rearing up. Hopefully *not* trying to whoosh itself to Vanya.
I began trying to get the case open with my mouth and one leg; Lyra popped the seal and opened hers with ease with her magic. Dinky said, "It's from Prince Jaggar!"
I nearly choked on it while Lyra said, "Wow, he wants us to come visit in Glantri! SWEET!"
Dinky jumped on my back. "Breathe, breathe!" I spat out the scroll and nearly fell down.
Lyra now popped the seal on mine and opened it, holding it in place for me. She's pretty good at telekinesing several things at once, though she doesn't have the raw strength I've seen Twilight display.
{Greetings and Salutations to you, Lady Bon-Bon of Ponyville,
I humbly request that you and your swain come to Glantri at your convenience to give a talk on cross-species shapeshifting and its dangers for a group of my associates. We have a mutual interest in matters draconic but my recent experiences have made me more keenly aware of certain problems inherent in shapeshifting. I have also extended an invitation to your friend Twilight's manservant, Spike, for I wish to discuss various matters draconic with him; I hope it would not be too much trouble for him to accompany you.
Please reply to me at your earliest convenience so we can discuss scheduling.
Your friend,
Prince Jaggar of Aalbaan.}
What's a swain?
"Man, Princes of Glantri never invite me to anything," Dinky said mournfully. "You two are lucky! Anyway, I have to get home for dinner. See you!"
She rushed off and I stared.
I hardly even... I mean, I did...
Glantri?
Lyra looked at me with the 'PLEASE' eyes.
I am too weak for my own good. "Okay," I told her.
Time to make another batch of the candy.
And turning into seaponies for our beach trip was kind of fun.
I still don't know why Applejack freaked out when we told her about it, though.
She's really too old to hide under a bed.
*******************
Lyra Heartstrings of Vanya
(a Lyra, Bon-Bon, and Spike story)
By John Biles
Part of the Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring canon.
*******************
Lyra's Lyric:
"I need a complete outfit... two... maybe three," I told Rarity, whose eyes lit up. "Suitable for the court of Prince Jaggar. And maybe... I don't know if I'll need one suit of armor or two."
"Darling, I don't make armor," Rarity said. "But I would *love* to design... you're going to Prince Jaggar's court?" she said, suddenly realizing, her eyes widening.
I reared in excitement. "Yeah! This should be a great adventure. Bon-Bon's really excited about it." Well, freaking out, anyway, but you don't tell people that about your fillyfriend.
"Well, she must come in for a nice outfit or three also. How many formal occasions will there be?" Rarity asked, suddenly all business, though her legs were quivering.
"I have no idea, but at least one formal dinner and Bon-Bon will be giving a talk on shapeshifting to a bunch of students of dragon lore," I told her. "At least two, so maybe three outfits in case one gets torn by a rampaging golem or something. Maybe something that works over chainmail for the inevitable fight to the death too." You know, I have no idea how to actually clean chainmail.
"Fight to the death?" she said in confusion.
"You know, the stuff that happens on adventures like you and I have," I told her. That she has. My only real adventure was helping out her gang in Canterlot and then on the Moonraker.
I had been planning to go to Darokin and other places, but I got sick here and met Bon-Bon and things didn't go according to plan.
Not that I regret meeting her but she's so... I can't imagine being happy to just live in one town forever.
"I suppose there may be complications. How are you travelling?" Rarity asked.
"I haven't figured it out but I was hoping to borrow Twilight's balloon," I told Rarity.
She circled me, studying me. "Sweetie!" she shouted.
Sweetie now ran out, a tape measure flying in the air over her and she began to measure me, while Rarity began fiddling with pieces of cloth.
"I want suits," I told her. "Bon-Bon said to tell you they should be red."
"If that's what you want," Rarity said with the tone which my mother uses when she's giving me what I want and it then will explode in my face.
But I still refuse to surrender to threats! Tom Wagonmaker never gives up! Or Vanya would still be enslaved by the Thri-Kreen.
Okay, they're totally fictional but man, I'd love to see a giant insect man, anyway.
You know, I have no idea where to get chainmail in this town. Maybe I can make it.
I watched Sweetie measure me. "Nice job, Sweetie," I told her and she smiled brightly. She's such a good little filly. I thought she used to be shorter, though.
She now tripped and fell on me and I nearly fell down. "I'm sorry!" Sweetie said urgently.
Oh, she's going through *that*.
Poor kid, that last growth spurt is a pain in the ass.
"Don't trip onto clients," Rarity said, now making images of clothing in the air and frowning at it. "When you say red, what shade?"
"I... um... the one Bon-Bon wants...," I mumbled. I kind of favor yellow myself but Bon-Bon doesn't want me to wear clothing that looks like it's made of her coat, which I can't really blame her for.
Rarity sighed. "Go home, tell Bon-Bon to come see me. She will need dresses, anyway."
"Will do," I told her.
I am going to Glantri! I am so excited, I can probably cause earthquakes by standing still.
*******************
Spike's Saga:
"Is the top hat too much?" I asked Dinky, who was helping Owlicious to put books away.
I was making sure my suit still fits me, which it does. It's weird, dragons don't grow continuously like people; we only grow when we undergo Dragon Sleep. So really, I had nothing to fear, but I'm not a normal dragon.
I think my parents did something or maybe Twilight did when she hatched me. I'd almost think I was really a lizard-man but my proportions are wrong and I don't have a snout.
"Top hats are never too much," Twilight shouted from upstairs and I laughed softly. Her dad gave me this one.
I struck a pose in front of the mirror with my cane. Yeah, I'm looking good.
I wonder how many dragons will be there.
A sudden hideous noise ripped through the library; I fell clutching my ears and Owlicious made a horrible noise and I heard him crash into something and now Twilight was shouting and Dinky was apologizing and I rolled around until there was a loud *crack* and then silence.
"Dinky, what were you doing with this wand?" Twilight asked, frowning at her.
Dinky sighed, looking at the oaken rod. "It was supposed to use sonics to augment my telekinesis to put books away faster."
"Dinky, you cannot solve every problem with sonics and bubbles," Twilight said chidingly.
"Mom's boyfriend does," Dinky grumbled. "It's our family trademarks."
"Neither are very healthy for the books," Twilight said. "Also, the proper way to get more telekinesis is to make a Bigby's Lifting Hand and to do exercises to build your own strength."
She soon had Dinky lifting the same book over and over and over.
I'd go crazy doing that.
Twilight now came over to me. "You three can borrow my balloon. I'd go with you but I have too much to catch up on from my last trip."
"I'll be okay," I told her. I feel a little weird. I'm used to going places with Twilight, but not on my own. I'm excited but a little nervous.
I want to know more about myself but I don't know if I'll like the answers.
She nuzzled me gently. "It'll be okay. Lyra and Bon-Bon are good mares and they'll watch over you."
"I'm just worried about you getting by without me," I told her.
"Dinky and Owlicious will help me. And all my friends are here," Twilight said, then sighed. "I wish I could tell you more but I'm sure Prince Jaggar can help you. He's a leading expert on dragons."
He also hunts dragons. Which makes me nervous. They're all evil dragons but some humans think all dragons are evil.
On the other hand, anyone who Bon-Bon could talk down can't be a real threat, right?
I hope so.
*******************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
"You are *so* lucky," Rarity said to me, talking at 3000 words a minute. I'd picked out good colors for Lyra's outfits and now she was taking measurements and trying to figure out what I should wear. I leave it to her judgment; she knows her work like I know mine.
"I'm nervous; I am not really an expert on this subject," I told her. "You probably know as much as I do."
"Well, you need to practice," Rarity said. "Marcus can tell you some things too." She giggled like a schoolfilly. "You are so lucky, attending a grand Glantrian ball, speaking to the assembled nobles, living the high life." She sighed enviously.
Grand ball? I don't remember a grand ball! All the dances I know are for drunk ponies in bars.
I'm not like that any more, but I know nothing of high culture!
I felt like I was going to come unglued.
Or maybe become glue.
"I wish I could go but I would hate to butt in uninvited," Rarity said, stalking around me, cloth flying in to lie on my body then departing; briefly I had a crown too.
I'd be happy to let you go but I already said yes and we got Spike to send the letter.
"Though Lady Aendyr has been talking about visiting with her family," she said gleefully. "Maybe for the Running of the Leaves."
I wondered who that was. "I'm sure you'll show her a good time," I told Rarity.
"I haven't anything to wear. Not for a visit by a fine lady of Glantri!" Rarity suddenly wailed and pulled out her couch and writhed around on it as if ants were biting her.
I waited patiently, trapped in a tangle of cloth which had now fallen on me as she abandoned the magics. I think a tiara was hanging off my right ear.
"I'm sure you'll make something nice for her," I told her. "Is she a human or a Pony?"
"Oh, she's human, she's an old friend of Marcus," Rarity said, brightening back up and going back to work. "And now she's a princess of Glantri."
Hopefully more dignified than the princess in Lyra's favorite series.
"Does your family have heraldry?" Rarity asked me.
"No, we're commoners," I told her. Lyra has distant noble ancestors but they're commoners now.
"Hmm, we shall have to design you something. What sort of animals do you like?"
We were soon deep into heraldry, which is, I'll tell you, very confusing.
********************
Lyra's Lyric:
"Do not touch anything or even look at it for too long. But especially, most importantly, never, ever volunteer to babysit anyone's familiar," Marcus said to me urgently. "Especially not salamanders." He shivered.
I'd asked him for some tips on dealing with Glantrians. I know what it's like from classes and books, but I haven't any firsthand experience.
We were at Twist's family's cafe; they're Earth ponies and they sell soup, salad, and sandwiches.
Marcus had a Belcadizian style flatbread wrap and onion soup and a plate of beans; I was trying this really delicious Careunzian soup with a lot of mushrooms and broccoli and cheese. He stared dolefully at the beans, sighed, and started eating.
"Why are you eating beans you don't want?" I asked.
"Because I need protein and a lot of what I eat here has no meat in it. And I can't just eat eggs and fish constantly," he said. "Not when I eat out, anyway."
Soup and Salad Cafe (not the most original name) has no meat at all other than things made with eggs, like their cakes and so on.
"So if we eat while human, we need meat or beans," I said.
He rattled off some other protein sources as well.
I wonder what protein is. But it must be important to humans.
"The big thing really is this. Glantrians tend to be touchy about showing they're a great wizard and they often got beat up by non-wizards as kids." He frowned. "I hope Bon-Bon will be okay but she has less rights than you and so does Spike. Since he can't actually cast any spells."
"He can't?" I said, surprised. "I thought Dragons... I mean, he's Twilight's apprentice, right?"
"Or son or maybe younger brother," Marcus paused, concentrating. "I'm not sure of the best term but if you can't do even a single spell, then you're a commoner. On the other hand, with Jaggar actually inviting you, anyone who messes with Bon-Bon or Spike will have to deal with Jaggar. And I know enough about Jaggar to know that no one angers Jaggar deliberately. He's the head of their army and a tough man."
I don't like the idea of anyone looking down on Bon-Bon for not being a wizard; it's not like she doesn't have magic; I can't even operate her candy machines without ending up wrapped in candy. And she has the usual Earth pony benefits as I learned when I foolishly tried to race her at the beach.
"So why doesn't Spike know any spells?"
"I think he's too young," Marcus said. "I think he has to go through Dragonsleep two or three more times to cast spells."
Hmm, there has to be some way to ensure that Bon-Bon gets the respect she deserves. This will take some thought.
*******************
Spike's Saga:
"Azkaban Metatron Zincos!" I shouted and made the gesture, just like in the book. The book flew over Sweetie's head as she dodged desperately and I cursed in frustration.
Having a filly trying to tutor you in magic is embarrassing enough without it *not working*.
Also, I don't understand why the cover of the book has been coated with black paint; Marcus is crazy anyway but what was he trying to hide?
I checked the art credit page and it indicated the cover was titled 'The rewards of magic' by Master Alabasos. Who was a Glantrian painter in the tenth century AC. See, this is the kind of trick you learn when you live in a library. Unfortunately the library only has a biography of him with a handful of pictures, all of which show wizards doing wizardy things.
So what is he hiding from Sweetie and I?
Dinky thinks there's a message from the Oards to their servants under the paint but I doubt it.
"Still no luck?" Twilight said sympathetically, looking down from the upper level where she and Dinky were shelving new books. "Also, it's 'Azarath Metrion Zinthos'. That spell's too complex to *start* with, anyway." Her voice sounded kind of odd when she said it, like she was someone else. I probably imagined it, though.
"Maybe Marcus can tell you, since he uses his hands too," Sweetie said hesitantly.
"I'd rather *die*," I said, scowling and she frowned at me and began talking about how nice he is; I think he put a charm spell on her and Rarity too.
Twilight appeared by us. "Don't your aunt and uncle cast spells? Maybe they can help you."
"They're busy with their work, and my time is short," I said, frustrated.
"Maybe we could turn Spike into a unicorn with the candy," Sweetie said hesitantly.
"It isn't strong enough to grant magical abilities and it wears off and they'd see through it, I'm sure," Twilight said. "You may be stuck until your next dragonsleep."
"Next two," I mumbled. "You'll probably both be married with children by then."
Twilight turned red and Sweetie said, "Wow, that's a while." She sounded amazed at the thought.
"With enough training, he ought to be able to learn something the normal way long before that," Dinky shouted down. "You should study anyway so you can be a *great* Dragon wizard and better than the others!"
I couldn't help but smile a little. "Thanks, Dinky."
"I'm sure you could learn if we had more... time...," Twilight said, starting to get that look.
The dangerous look.
Dinky studied us with the look of someone who knows something.
Sweetie did a card reading now, then said, "If you try to take Spike back in time, he'll miss the trip to Glantri."
I can never tell if she's telling the truth or using the cards as an excuse to push what she thinks is best. "Dammit," I said.
"Maybe if we go to Canterlot, I can tap into the hourglass and..." Twilight began.
"Take me!" Dinky said excitedly.
"It's dangerous to mess with that," Sweetie said urgently, sounding worried. "Maybe I could shrink down and ride in Spike's pocket and cast spells for him."
"The Glantrians will know," Twilight said, waving a hoof. "They're expert wizards."
"You could build a spell matrix, insert it into his brain and let him cast that spell through it, using his life force," Dinky suggested from up above.
That sounds too dangerous to me.
"Maybe you can do something with the Element of Magic to help him?" Sweetie suggested.
I now felt all tingly as Twilight summoned her Element from its storage in the safe and then began studying me with it, looking intent. I could feel magic all over me.
Dinky brought some books down and Twilight, Sweetie, and Dinky consulted them but I don't think anyone but Twilight actually understood them.
Lyra and Bon-Bon came in, wearing fancy outfits; Lyra wore a red suit with green trim and a nice fedora; Bon-Bon had a big floppy sun hat and a purple dress with gold trim with a swirly translucent ribbon through her hair which changed color to contrast with the different colors in her hair. "Ta da!" Lyra said; I noticed she had a sword for some reason, though it kept dragging the ground and she had to synch it back up with telekinesis. They each had a pendant; Bon-Bon's had four long, wrapped candies forming an 'X' over a yellow background; Lyra's showed a green pony rampant on purple, reaching towards a star. "You need to get Rarity to pretty you up," Lyra said excitedly to me.
I want to but I will die.
Then Bon-Bon whispered to her urgently and she looked embarrassed.
"Sorry, Spike. I bet Bon-Bon can make you something nice, though," Lyra said apologetically.
"Fluttershy is a great seamstress and she could pretty you up some," Twilight said kindly to me.
I could live with Fluttershy helping me. "I'll go see her right now," I said, so I could cry in peace on the way there.
*********************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
"Spike has the same problem," Twilight said to me; we were all seated on our haunches around a low table which Dinky had put some snacks on for us. "You should ask Prince Jaggar for a badge. Or maybe... I know Pinkie can do bardic spells, even if she forgets half the time. So maybe she and Lyra could teach you enough to do just one and qualify."
"Oh yeah!," Lyra said excitedly.
"I'm not a great musician," I confessed, then nibbled on a corn chip.
"I just want them to respect you," Lyra said urgently. "We should at least try."
Well, it can't hurt to try. I hope.
*******************
Lyra's Lyric:
"Grannie taught me," Pinkie said. "And I think my cutie mark helps me be able to be a bard."
Bon-Bon looked at her own cutie mark and frowned. "Mine isn't really like that."
"Your cutie mark makes people *happy*," Pinkie said. "And so does mine! We're like cutie-sisters!" she said excitedly.
Bon-Bon laughed nervously.
We were in Pinkie's room in Sugarcube Corner. There's a painting of her family on the wall; it must be new because it shows Pinkie as she is now and her father has wings. I wonder who did it. She has a nice bed with pink sheets and long shelves on the walls full of gag items. "Any of those magical?" I asked Pinkie curiously.
"I have *no* idea," Pinkie said. "I guess, maybe... what are you thinking?"
I scanned them and identified four magical things. There was an empty potion bottle, stoppered shut and labeled 'invisible ink'. There was a pair of glasses. There was a small box with a switch on the side. And there was a snow globe which showed Canterlot; if you looked carefully, you could see a tiny Ditzy Doo inside, standing on a balcony with her mailbag. "What is the box with the switch for?"
"I don't know but if you flip the switch, an efreeti shows up and kicks you in the flank," Pinkie said, trying to twist around and rub her behind as if she'd just been kicked.
"Why would you even keep something like that?" Bon-Bon asked, confused.
"If all else fails, having an efreeti appear and kick you in the butt can generally get a laugh," Pinkie said. "The snowglobe used to let me time travel but it doesn't work now," she said, noticing me studying it. "But I can't throw away something Grandma Pie gave me."
"But how could it have Ditzy in it as she is now if your grandmother gave it to you?" I asked, confused.
"It does not have..." Pinkie paused, eyes wide. "Wait, when did Ditzy get in there?"
"Let's get back to bard training," Bon-Bon said firmly.
"I need to go talk to...," Pinkie began.
"Please, we need to try this," I told Pinkie, knowing she'd lose the whole day on this somehow and we have limited time.
"Can you sing?" she asked Bon-Bon, settling down in front of her.
"Not very well," Bon-Bon said. She sighed. "I'm not very musical."
"You were great at the big song and dance in Canterlot!," Pinkie said. "Have some confidence. We believe in you, Bon-Bon."
"Yeah. I need a star for my musical, after all!" I'm still working on it. The first... second... the last draft had issues, like how I can't afford a 200 piece orchestra.
Bon-Bon smiled nervously. "Well, I'll do my best."
She began singing and I played my harp and Pinkie strapped on her mobile-one-pony-band thing. Having watched her put it on, I'm still not sure how she puts it on.
Pinkie led us down the stairs and out of Sugarcube Corner, as Bon-Bon belted out a song about how she was going to get drunk and she sure did regret it but it was just how it was going to be. Pretty soon, Berry Punch came out and joined us and a lot of other people and everyone was passing bottles around.
To make a long story short, we basically blew the afternoon leading half the town in getting progressively more drunk and dancing and singing. This was the day I learned that you should never, ever singing ninety nine bottles of beer on the wall with Berry Punch. *Ever*.
By the end, we were all out of action and Berry Punch was moaning about how she was a terrible mother and it was all Bon-Bon's fault and Bon-Bon was as green as I am and I resolved to pick the music next time.
"See, you can do it. You enchanted the whole town!" Pinkie said excitedly; she was the only person still functional out of the whole group. Though she kept belching.
"Mom, what did you do this time?" Pinchy, her daughter, said to Berry Punch, who covered her eyes with one leg and said, "If I can't see you, you can't see me."
"I don't think it would be wise to get a town full of wizards drunk," Bon-Bon said.
"Yes, but you did it! It's all about learning ways to channel your Earth Pony power into your art!," Pinkie said, bouncing around as if she hadn't had enough liquor to kill an elephant. "Look, you make your magic candy with your Earth pony powers, right?"
"Right, it's all made of things which come from the Earth, so I can use my Cutie mark to enchant it," Bon-Bon said, then moaned. "I haven't drunk this much in months."
"You just draw the power up to your mouth and put it into your words. And your dance. It's how being a Bard works, it's why I can do it," Pinkie said. "Though my cutie mark helps. I mean, if you can make magic things, doesn't that make you a magic-user?"
"Yeah," I said. "We can figure out some kinds of magic candy... I mean, it would be silly to say someone who makes magic items isn't magical, right?"
"Couldn't you have thought of this before I got this sick?" Bon-Bon moaned.
"No," Pinkie said.
I should have really thought about it, but yeah, I think it's candy making time.
*******************
Spike's Saga:
Fluttershy was kind enough to make me a black cape to go with my tuxedo; it had a red satin lining and she put Twilight's cutie mark and a rearing dragon in gold on the black outer side, to show off both my connection to Twilight and my status as a proud dragon.
"This is awesome," I said excitedly. "Thanks so much, Fluttershy!"
Angel gave me two paws up, but then he began pointing out in the chicken yard and jumping wildly.
"Oh dear, we'd better check on the chickens," Fluttershy said, clearly worried.
We found Slither curled up between the chickens and their house, sleeping in the sunlight. The chickens were all pressed against the fence, panicking, while Angel stood in the door of the house and looked smug.
"Oh, Slither, I know you need your sunlight but you're scaring the chickens," Fluttershy said gently to him; he slowly stirred and his head rose to study hers. "Spike, can you take him up on the roof?"
I twirled my cape. "The Incredible Spike can do anything!"
First lesson: giant snakes are not the same as rope. I tried slinging him in a series of loops around my shoulder and he grappled my mid-section and wouldn't let go until Fluttershy sang him to sleep.
Second lesson: I am not strong enough to throw a giant snake on the roof or strong enough to catch him when he falls on me.
Third lesson: I can throw Angel a long way when he laughs at me.
Fourth lesson: Having Angel throw things at me when I try to climb a ladder while fireman carrying a huge snake makes me fall down.
Fifth lesson: Capes can blow in your face while trying to climb a ladder. I can't blame that one on Angel but I know he *hoped* it would happen.
The good news was that Slither lashed out and grabbed around a tree branch, so I just swung over instead of falling down. The bad was that it trapped me, hanging from the tree branch, while Angel rolled around laughing.
The worst was that *Marcus* of all people ambled up the road, saw me, and laughed at me.
No choice but to DESTROY HIM with magic! "Azkaroth Metric Zinc Oxide!" I shouted. I felt huge amounts of magic surge through me and...
White powder and something that resembled liquid fat poured down on me and Slither, who lost his grip on the branch and we fell down... down...
Marcus shouted something and a purple glowing disc appeared and caught us gently, before we could splat; the powder and the fat now mixed together into some sort of gooey but colorless liquid that smelled terrible.
"What exactly were you trying to cast?" Marcus asked curiously. "I don't know this spell."
Fluttershy came out, sniffing the air. "Oh dear. I think we may have a problem."
"What?" Marcus asked nervously.
"How did you cover yourself in insect pheromones, Spike?" Fluttershy asked. "That's going to signal nearby bees and ants you're a dead worker and they need to come dispose of your body."
Marcus' jaw dropped lower than I thought a jaw could drop. So did mine.
A distant buzzing grew louder and now I could see forces of ants approaching my position, though I was in the air.
Then Marcus took off running in a panic, with us dragged after him and the bees and ants making chase as Fluttershy tried to keep up. "I don't understand, I keep my supply of it sealed," Fluttershy said. "Where did it come from?"
"I fumbled a spell," I said miserably.
Marcus started to say something, looked at me, then said, "I think he was trying to levitate Slither onto the roof."
Slither was crawling all over me, trying to rub off the liquid onto me; I couldn't tell if it was working but I tried to get him to stop. Unfortunately, grappling a snake rarely goes well.
We now ran into the middle of town where everyone was lying around moaning and the air smelled like berries and beer and I prayed I had not done this. Fluttershy stared and Marcus buried his face in his hands as he ran.
We'd lost the ants, but the bees were coming on relentlessly and now Twilight came out of the library, saw us and cast her wings spell, then joined us in the air. "Spike, why are you doused in Oleic Acid?" she asked; she had some kind of magic glowing stuff in front of her eyes.
"I don't know! I tried to cast a spell and it didn't work and it dumped stuff on me which turned into this stuff and now the bees want to bury me!" I shouted.
Marcus wiggled his nose and stared at Twilight and she nodded.
"I'll be right back!" She flew off into the library.
Dammit, he probably told her something... I wonder if I could... I guess Fluttershy wouldn't like me frying the bees.
We ran out of road at the river and Fluttershy had to grab Marcus by his shirt and lift him up and carry him downstream as the bees chased us, staying just ahead of the horde.
"Can't you make the bees chill out or something?" I shouted to Fluttershy.
"Oh wait, water! Dump them in the river, Marcus," Fluttershy said.
DAMMIT!
"It won't attract sharks or something, right?" Marcus said warily.
"There are no sharks in the freshwater here," Fluttershy. "Unless someone dumped a bull shark here, I suppose. The odds of that are very low."
A fin now broke the surface.
"Oh my."
Marcus' shirt now began to slowly tear. I couldn't help laughing at him.
"Oh dear," Fluttershy said, trying to wiggle around to use her legs to hold on as the shirt shredded completely. The end result was that ALL of us got dragged into the water; to my horror, the spell followed Marcus' trajectory and I now was pulled down with them.
As I fumbled for air, I soon surfaced now tied to the shark by Slither, who was trying to crush it. It flailed around and I kept going under and coming up.
The next time, I could see that Slither's tail was tangled around Marcus' foot and so the shark was dragging Fluttershy and Marcus behind him as he raced down the river because... damned if I know. Wise people run away from Marcus. I guess if Marcus is tied to you, this goes on for a looong time.
I heard Twilight shouting our names and I shouted, "TWILIGHT!" then went under again.
ANOTHER snake now lashed out from the side of the river.
At that point, my brain just gave up, unable to believe any of this was real. Stuff happened, I think, but I only recovered functioning when I was lying in the grass as Applejack coiled a rope and Twilight stood by her, casting a spell that dried us all off.
Slither now... slithered... over to Fluttershy and wrapped himself around her like a belt, while she gently stroked his head and made soothing noises.
Marcus, now down to his underwear, laid in the grass, staring at the sky. Well, he did have his boots on too. "I... how did I lose my pants?" he mumbled.
"They snagged on some weeds, I think," Fluttershy said, then began checking us over.
My outfit had been COMPLETELY destroyed to my dismay.
"Oh dear, I think you're going to need to go see Ra...," Fluttershy began, then sighed. "We'll go back to my place and I'll fix everything."
"Thank you," I said weakly.
"Does anyone know why half the town is down for the count downtown?" Twilight asked.
Don't know, don't want to know.
*********************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
I tossed the last of the saddlebags into the balloon, then walked up the ramp into it; part of the side opens down into an entrance ramp. Twilight had spent two hours going over how to operate the balloon with Lyra, since she's the only one of us who can actually engage with the control mechanisms.
"Don't worry, once you reach the Broken Lands, Crash is going to meet you and escort you to the border. Once you reach Belcadiz, you can follow the river upstream," Rainbow Dash told Spike. "I wish I could go with you but I have to get ready to... teach." She laughed nervously.
I consulted the map Twilight made for us. That made sense. I just hope Crash doesn't get lost.
The nice thing about flying by balloon is that it's peaceful and calm and kind of amazing to see the world go by under you. The bad part is that there isn't much to do and slowly, you begin to go stir-crazy.
Around the end of the first day of ballooning, Lyra was tired from keeping us on course, I was bored out of my skull, and Spike had nearly blown the balloon up four times trying to cast some spell he's obsessed with.
I had taken his book and was sitting on it, while he pouted.
We were somewhere over Darokin; Lyra was pretty sure we were on course and it looked like the river we wanted was ahead of us. Ideally, we can follow this all the way to Glantri.
Assuming we don't go mad first.
*****************
Lyra's Lyric:
This is the part of the story that generally gets summed up in three sentences, which is why I was going crazy. I couldn't even work on my musical because I had to periodically readjust our course and I had to listen to Spike mumbling some phrase under his breath, which he says differently EVERY TIME. "Spike, what does that spell even do?"
"It summons tentacles of dark energy from the seventh layer of the Well of Thanatos to destroy Marcus," Spike said and I sighed.
"Rarity wouldn't be happy if you succeeded. Also, isn't that too hard a spell to *start* with?" I asked him.
"It's one of the starter spells in the book," he said, stubbornly sitting with his back to the heater; I guess that's comfy to a dragon.
"Bon-Bon, can I see the book?" I asked.
"What if the balloon blows up?" she asked.
"I am a professional, I won't blow up the balloon," I assured her, then scratched her ears telekinetically.
She made happy noises and rose, then kicked the book to me. Someone had dumped black paint in the cover for some reason but the inside made it clear this was an introductory spellbook from Glantri.
About half of it was a series of short stories about magic use and discussion of magical theory. "Spike, that phrase is just part of an example," I told him. "Without the correct gestures, it's useless."
Spike now stared at me, mouth wide open.
See, in the story, Magister Klarath encounters a dwarf who tries to rob him, so he declaims the verbal component, makes gestures which are only detailed in a picture and then sprinkles a black powder, the material component. And then the tentacles rise up and grapple the dwarf.
I paged to the detect magic page, then carefully cast a simple spell to make my horn glow. Then I coached Spike through the detect magic spell, making him do each syllable over and over and the hand gestures independently. Bon-Bon watched all this, looking nervous.
Spike then tried to do the whole thing in order. The first time, he fumbled the gestures and nothing happened. The second time, he ended with 'ham sandwich' instead of 'hamsa vico'. The third time he got it right and I felt magic but nothing happened. "Can you see the magic in the glow?" I asked Spike.
"The air is glowing purple and I can hardly see anything, like there's magic EVERYWHERE," Spike said frantically.
He tried again and now he shrank down to one inch tall.
I stared. "What the..."
Bon-Bon grabbed the book. "No more experiments," she said, once she'd spat it out and sat on it.
"I don't get it! Why can't I get it to work right?" Spike said frantically.
Fortunately, he turned back to normal before long. I tried studying him with magic but I didn't pay much attention in my theory classes and he seemed basically normal to me. "Well, you should be able to learn because if you weren't, the spell wouldn't do anything at all. Here, Bon-Bon, I need you to demonstrate."
"I am not monkeying around with more magic," Bon-Bon said. "I have my magic candies and if they won't accept that as magic, then I will just deal with it." She tossed her head and I sighed. She can be really stubborn.
"Anyway, there has to be some kind of solution," I told him.
And some way to keep us from going mad from boredom. Can't we just cut to something exciting?
********************
Spike's Saga:
I had to re-route EIGHT messages from Celestia to Twilight. And four to Celestia Twilight sent to me by mistake; this was my one break from slowly going mad of boredom. The night sky, at least, was beautiful as we hovered over the river; Lyra had 'tethered' the balloon so she could rest and so we wouldn't get lost in our sleep. There was some city nearby.
Just as we were about to have dinner (sandwiches which I made and Twilight packed and sealed for freshness), a flying boat approached us; it had huge glowing signs 'Zankavee's Flying Dinner Show'. "Hello, gentlemares and gentlelizard," one of the men on the ship said; he wore a tuxedo like mine and had a violin. "We can serenade you for only fifty gold! Throw in fifty more and we'll do a fireworks show too!"
Lyra threw them the money and then she and Bon-Bon whispered fiercely and finally Bon-Bon sighed. I have to say, they were really good but watching Lyra and Bon-Bon be all snuggly while they ate their sandwiches made me want to puke. I sat on the other side of the balloon, watching the stars and wishing I could get a stupid spell to work!
Also, seeing them sleeping side by side later reminded me of Rarity.
Dammit.
I finally went to sleep and dreamed of blowing up Marcus.
*******************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
I really thought Crash was going to live up to her name but instead she swerved at the last second and simply made my mane get all frizzy from the air wash. "Hey, gals and Spike," Rainbow Crash said cheerfully; she looks just like Dash until you realize her rainbow is backwards. "Trollhattan and the Red Orcs have gone to war, but we should be able to just fly over them without any trouble. I'll drum up a good wind and we should have you to Glantri in no time at all!"
In fact, soon we were making good time; we flew over the battle; you could see hordes of orcs on horses busy circling trolls and firing arrows into them; then the trolls would eat the arrows, get bigger and charge the orcs. Mostly the orcs evaded them but sometimes, they got caught.
I tried not to watch, while Lyra observed and began composing a song about it.
I was kind of surprised when Crash hustled me around to one side of the balloon and began whispering to me. "You've been seeing Lyra for a while, right?"
"Right," I whispered back.
"And it looks like Chief Red Rock just shoved his sacred stone axe down that troll's throat, and now the guy's choking on it! Time to consult the referees on if this is a legal move," Spike said to... I don't know. When Spike is bored, he begins color commenting things.
"Does she ever... I mean..." Crash started to get agitated. Given Crash is dating a stallion, I'm not sure why she's asking me about Lyra.
"You're dating a... he's like Soarin', right?" I said. Who I just barely know beyond him being a Wonderbolt and Dash having a thing for him.
"It's fine when we're at the base, but he starts flirting with everything female when we leave it," Crash mumbled. "I don't know what to do."
"Dump his ass like a ton of bricks," I said firmly.
She winced. "But I love him."
"But he doesn't love you. Burn whatever he loves most and give him the hoof," I told her firmly.
I spent the next HALF HOUR having to tell her this over and over and it didn't sink in.
Clearly, she wants to save this but I expect if he can't even hide it in front of her, they're doomed.
Lyra kindly saved me from insanity by saying, "Hey, does Spikey cast spells?"
Spike froze.
"He can do a little magic but mostly he's just really good with his breath weapon," Rainbow Crash said, cheering up and rising; we'd been sitting down. "Dawn Gleaming taught him some tricks, I think."
"Spike can't seem to get spells to work right... do you think Dawn Gleaming would mind if we dropped in on her to have her take a quick look at him?" Lyra asked.
"Will we have time for that?" I asked Lyra.
"Hmm, we can try. Might make you late, though," Crash said, then looked at Spike. "You want to give it a shot?"
"Yes," Spike said. "I just... I don't know what I'm doing wrong." He sounded frustrated.
"Then diversion time! Bind your manes, it's high wind time!" Crash said.
I quickly found out my mane tastes terrible but I already knew that. Lyra had to hold my hair down and laughed like a maniac all the way there.
This had better not make us late.
******************
Lyra's Lyric:
"Oh hoh, so the great Twilight Sparkle couldn't figure this out?" Dawn Gleaming said. "I'll get to this easily!"
We were in her lab with 'Sammy' and Spikey. It was full of tables and beakers and flasks and racks of chemicals and books and open spaces with symbols drawn on the floor.
She cast spells of a complexity I could only dream of, then studied Spike, circling around him, while Spikey and Sammy held up various books or conversed with her in dense arcane jargon. Most of it flew over my head, since I kind of neglected theory in favor of song lyrics.
However, I now began weaving the jargon into a song in my head, singing softly to myself.
However, I don't know anything that rhymes with 'octyllic' or 'nemoidic'. It would be cheating to just use the 'ic'.
"Okay, Spike, try this," Dawn Gleaming said, floating a book in front of him. It was the same spell as before, but this time, adapted for only four fingers. I hadn't even NOTICED. No wonder he had trouble! Spike has a thumb and *three* fingers instead of four fingers, and I never noticed until now!
"Is that a book for dragons?" I asked.
"It's spells I adapted for Spikey," Dawn Gleaming said proudly. "I took the methods used for horn to hand conversion and then adjusted them." Then a five minute lecture ensued, during which Crash and Bon-Bon were busy pushing and pulling these giant panes of glass on wheels which they now fenced in a corner with and sat behind for some reason.
Maybe they wanted to chat about Crash's tragic love for Soarin' some more; I have a song about it but I can't finish it until I know *how* it all ends in flames.
Hmm, maybe Act two of my musical could end with a lover's spat, setting everything on fire!
"Okay, this is a light spell," Dawn Gleaming said. "Follow the instructions."
Spike followed them while I mused on the question of how to get the ashes off the stage fast enough.
Then Spike floated up into the air and I stared at him in confusion. "That's not right."
"I can't get down!"
Crash came out and sat on him until it stopped.
"Thanks, Crash," Spike mumbled.
"Chaos magic," Sammy said.
"I concur," Dawn Gleaming said, frowning. "Spike, tell me about your hatching. What kind of potion did your foolish mistress use on you?"
"I think she cast a spell," Spike said hesitantly. "It also turned her parents into plants."
"..." Man, my parents would never forgive me if I did that.
"Didn't she study the past tests before seeking admission?" Dawn Gleaming said, mouth wide open.
"Don't they change them so you can't?" Spike said hesitantly.
"I think your parents stole the records," Spikey said to Dawn. "To ensure your success."
"Lyra, what was your admission test like?" Bon-Bon shouted from behind the glass.
Maybe the glass is some kind of performance piece? Representing the barriers to communication which can hang invisibly between people? Oooh, subtle, Crash. She hid behind it, showing her troubles in communicating with Cruisin'! That's *brilliant*.
"Spike, headbutt Lyra back to reality," Bon-Bon said, sighing.
Spike headbutted me. "Wake up!"
I feel down in surprise. "I played some instruments, did some singing, then I had to sing a song in eight octaves."
Dawn Gleaming blinked. "How on earth is a filly supposed to do that? I could do that now with magic, but even someone as ingenious as myself couldn't have done it at that age. I had a hard enough time with the hatching potion."
"That was the point; they wanted to see how you dealt with something impossible," I told her.
"That's ludicrous," Dawn Gleaming said, frowning. "And kind of mean."
"So what did you do, Lyra?" Spike asked curiously.
"I made up a song about how it was impossible to fulfill their request and accompanied myself on the harp, covering as many octaves as I could," I said proudly. "It's how I got my cutie mark!"
"A test that can't be passed... ludicrous," Dawn Gleaming grumbled. "I passed mine, I just had to be *prepared*. Which I was, after enough study. Anyway, the potion hatched Spikey without any problems."
"She must have had a wild surge," Sammy said thoughtfully. "And now he has wild surges when he tries to cast spells."
Spike grimaced. "Well, great." He sat down and buried his face in his hands.
"I'm sorry, Spike," Bon-Bon said softly. She dug in her pack.
"Well, the good news is that wild mages are recognized as mages in Glantri," Dawn Gleaming said. "Just warn the border guards so they don't blow up." She came over and nuzzled Spike hesitantly. "Don't be sad, you have a rare and powerful talent if you can learn to control it."
"Most wild mages blow..." Spikey began, but Sammy put a hand over his mouth and they began wrestling around.
Dawn Gleaming winced. "Wild magic is dangerous but powerful if you know what you're doing. But it's best not to try it too much until you finish your trip."
"Hey, there you are, Crash," Cruisin' said from the doorway.
My 'Bon-Bon Wall of Hate' sense suddenly triggered; given I hadn't done anything wrong, I felt a sense of total panic because any time I don't know how it got set off, it's even worse than when it *is* my fault.
Crash now flew out from behind the glass panes, laughing nervously as she approached Cruisin'. "Hey, honey, I brought in some friends to consult with Dawn Gleaming."
"Hi, Spike," Cruisin' said cheerfully to Spike. "Hey, Lyra," he said, but when he turned to Bon-Bon, he got a smile that I recognized as a stallion on the prowl. Oh hell no!
"This is my *marefriend*, Bon-Bon," I said very firmly to Cruisin' as he slinked in.
"Can you please take your booty-chasing out of my lab?" Dawn Gleaming snapped at him. "Your pheromones make my potions go flat."
'Flat'? I must have slept through those classes too. How does a potion go 'flat'?
Bon-Bon flicked a brush out of her bag with her tail. She began brushing Rainbow Crash's mane. "You have to look good for our date, dear," she *purred* to Crash, who froze up. I think I froze up too, while Spike stared in confusion and Spikey scratched his head and Sammy... Sammy grinned. What the hay does he know that I don't???
"Bon-Bon, what is going on?" I whispered to her.
Crash said something incoherent about oatmeal and Belcadizian silver.
Cruisin' froze. "Date?"
"She knows a wonderful little cafe in Fort Monteleone she's taking us to for dinner," Bon-Bon purred and I shivered; there was something different about how she stood, but it made me shiver.
"I... she is?" he said in shock.
"Oh yes, we're looking forward to a nice evening with her," I said, trying to back Bon-Bon up though I have *no clue* what she is doing but Bon-Bon doesn't do crazy things, so...
"Oh yes, it will be very nice," Crash said, her voice strained, shivering as Bon-Bon brushed her mane.
"But..." he said weakly and now Bon-Bon hustled us out the door past him.
"Thanks for the help, Dawn Gleaming! We'll make sure we don't wear out Rainbow Crash too much." Bon-Bon continued hustling us along.
Cruisin' tried to rally. "Well, I could come with you," he began.
"I think Dawn needs to test her new fire spell and you'd make a good target," Sammy said cheerfully. "So we need you to stay here."
Cruisin' was still talking his way out of that when we got out the door and fled.
I'm still not sure what's going on.
*****************
Spike's Saga:
"The goal is to make him jealous and show him what it feels like when he hits on other mares in front of Crash," Bon-Bon said to Lyra.
"But you were so... you just... vavoom!," Lyra said, looking stunned.
Crash was pushing us up out of the base with winds at high speed. She circled us and the balloon rose as she rose.
Bon-Bon turned red. "I had to make it believable." She nuzzled Lyra shyly. "I just had to teach him a lesson."
The last thing I want is to listen to mushy stuff, so I tried to ignore them and thought about what Dawn Gleaming had told me.
Was I broken because of how I got hatched? What am I going to do about it? I now wish I'd studied magical theory harder; I know more than most people or I couldn't even try to cast those spells, but I'm not as versed as Twilight or Dawn.
Wild magic taps raw chaos. I know you can use it to control certain kinds of random magical items, like Decks of Many Things or Wands of Wonder. If you know what you're doing, you can sometimes boost your magic with it but it can also mean your spells fizzle. And sometimes, you just get random stuff.
But I'm getting random stuff *all the time*.
It could be because I'm too young for it, I guess. I'm smart enough but my body can't handle it.
I went round inside my head until we reached the border and had to land to go through customs at this little border fort. Belcadizians manned the fort. I showed them our invitations from Jaggar and they stared in shock, cast some spells, then looked more shocked.
"I see," the guard captain said; he had dark skin (the human kind, I was darker than he was) and long flowing black hair bound into two braids and wore a Glantrian military uniform. "Okay, you will need to be certified."
Lyra moved her harp around and got a pass indicating she is an Arcaner, certified in the use of magic. Crash already had a pass certifying her as an Arcaner, which I wonder how she got, given she doesn't cast spells. But it was officially stamped and everything.
I stepped up and cast light. Nothing happened but just as I was about to give up, a ball of light appeared. HAH! Maybe I just needed practice. Yeah!
Bon-Bon and Lyra both applauded me by stamping their hooves. I bowed and adjusted my hat and cape.
I got an Arcaner pass. HAH!
Bon-Bon stepped up, then showed them her cookbook of magical candies and proceeded to flip a redhot into her mouth and breathe fire.
"Hey, can I have one?" I asked her. I bet I could make SUPER fire with that.
She flicked me one, then pulled a cape out of her bags and put it on, then flicked out another candy and turned into a Belcadizian Elf, quickly wrapping the cape around herself to hide her body. "So, does that qualify?"
"So you make these," the guard captain said, studying the cookbook. "We'll need to see some proof you can do this."
To my surprise, she had a small cauldron and soon mixed stuff in it and cooked it while the guards cast spells and studied what she was doing. They looked amazed, so I decided to try a magic detection spell.
This turned me invisible.
Aaargh!
Finally, the stuff in the cauldron became gooey and she dipped out some and shaped it with little tools she held with her mouth and tail and then it cooled and one of the guards tried one and his hair turned purple.
"Hmm, this is unusual, but alchemy IS magic use, so I will give you provisional Arcaner status," the guard said. "If you stay more than thirty days, you should go to the Great School of Magic for full certification."
Bon-Bon smiled brightly and gave a huge sigh of relief.
"You'll probably have less trouble if you stay in Elven form," the captain continued.
One of his men said something about mountains and got elbowed by another.
I don't get it.
"I'll be all sorts of things, I am going to give a lecture on shapeshifting," Bon-Bon said nervously. "To some of Prince Jaggar's allies."
"Good luck," the captain said very seriously. "You're free to go."
"I'd best head back," Crash said.
"Let's hit that cafe," Bon-Bon said. "We need dinner and we can find an inn."
Lyra now got a grin and I knew this would end in fire.
***************
Bon-Bon's Story:
Crash had to buy us some clothing and find a place for us to park our balloon; fortunately, Glantri seems the kind of place where you *can* find an inn with balloon parking spaces. We got a room, downed the candy and took on Elven forms and got dressed in proper clothing. I was nervous but I should practice for my lecture.
I'm going to become a bird, a fish, a human, a wolf, and a dragon during it. If it all works right. I did practice all those but I keep worrying about the aquarium.
Animal forms are hard, I have to say. Humans and Elves aren't so bad, though I can't smell anything. But I now learned Elves had pretty good hearing, which helped.
"Spike, I have to say you look great," Lyra said to Spike; I have to agree, his suit and hat fit him perfectly, and his purple and green striped hair made a good contrast. He was kind of short, though.
"I look like a kid," he grumbled, studying himself in the mirror.
You are a kid, I thought. But he wants so much to be grown up like I did; I got in tons of trouble with Berry Punch because of that. And had fun, but I was young and foolish and had no thought for tomorrow.
Like Lyra still is sometimes.
We all got dressed up and headed out to eat; Crash and I struggled with the super-elaborate dresses she'd bought (to my surprise). "Your dress is very nice," I told her. It was blue and black; mine was cream and green. Lyra had a dark blue suit which was quite nice on her.
Everyone kept staring at my mane as we walked through the streets to a cafe. I don't know why. It's perfectly normal. I guess it was not in a normal Belcadizian style, though. Lyra also got stares, but that was because she had a horn in the middle of her forehead.
We reached the cafe and sat down to eat, studying the menu, which was full of things I had never ever heard of. Fortunately, Lyra could translate for us all, so I decided to try a Belcadizian omlette; it's made with eggs, potatos, onions, and sliced peppers.
Lyra got a shrimp stew, Crash got gazpacho, which turned out to be a tomato soup, and Spike got battered, fried flatfish. It smelled wonderful and I had a little of Crash's soup and she tried my omlette, which was a little hot but quite good.
"I... Bon-Bon... thanks for trying to help me," Crash finally said to me.
"I'm glad to help. But if he doesn't shape up, *dump him* like a Roc laying an egg," I told her.
"Rocs don't really lay eggs from high above their nests and then let the ones that break die," Spike said chidingly. "That's an old mares' tale. They'd all die out if they did that; even a Roc's egg can't take a long fall."
I should have paid more attention in school, really. I was usually thinking about some cute guy. Lyra's actually the first *mare* I have gone trotting with. But she... stupid Octavia, thinks she's so classy and elegant and high class and...
Sometimes, I wonder what Lyra sees in me. Though I try not to get down on myself. Here I am, on my way to visit a Prince who wants *my* advice.
I just wish I had more useful advice. I did talk to Fluttershy and did some reading but I am so in over my head.
I don't know how Lyra handles being in over her head all the time. She was scarfing down food so easily; I was fumbling with my silverware, trying to keep my dress clean; this thing is pretty but it's so easy to spill things on it.
The waiter now brought us desserts. "Seniors and Senoritas," he said gravely. "Enjoy!" Dessert smelled like peaches; it was a kind of cake with orange frosting which the waiter now set on fire! I stared, eyes wide; the frosting now turned blue as it burned and the smoke smelled like blueberries.
"How did you do this?" I asked; I have to know the trick.
"House secret," he said, and we dug into it; it was wonderful; I had to remind myself to use my fork and not just stick my face in it.
Crash DID stick her face in it and everyone in the place stared and I turned red and Spike and Lyra laughed.
"Now that is enthusiasm," the waiter said smoothly. Then he wiped her face and cut her a slice without further comment.
I made sure to leave him a large tip when we finished.
"You should probably sleep here," Lyra told Crash. "Don't try and fly back at night."
We got a double room, so Crash had to share a bed with Spike, but I agreed with Lyra; it was too dangerous and I felt proud of Lyra for being sensible for once.
"Thank you," Crash said as we got ready for bed, having turned back to normal.
"You've been a huge help to us, so we had to pay you back," I told her. "You can keep the dress; it should impress Cruisin'. Even if you should dump him."
"I don't know if I can," she mumbled. "I was made to love him."
"You have free will now, though," Lyra said hesitantly.
I went over to her and touched her face with a hoof. "Crash, you can be anything you want to be. You are your own person now, not a puppet, not a slave, not a tool. You can do anything you want. You just have to want it." She shivered, staring at me, eyes not quite meeting mine.
I let go. "I had a coltfriend once, I thought... he was terrible, but I thought I loved him, that it was my fault when he was bad. Berry had to get rid of him to save me," I told her urgently. "So either get him to shape up or dump him but I doubt you can change him, whatever his origins. People don't change easily." I didn't.
Lyra frowned; I'd never told her this story; it was over before I met her. "Who was this?" she said angrily.
"No one you know, dear; he left town," I told Lyra. I don't know what Berry did... probably don't want to know... but she drove him out of town somehow. Because she's my friend.
Now I felt guilty I don't see her so much any more.
I should have asked her to come.
Too late now, though. Mistakes are like that.
Hey, she knew a flaming dessert thing... maybe she knows the cake secret!
I know it involved alcohol somehow.
"Anyway, let's sleep," Crash mumbled.
Spike had already clonked out and I hope he doesn't snore all night.
******************
Spike's Saga:
I was fast asleep when I woke up.
Shut up!
I... Look, I woke up because there was an intruder in the room. Hovering over the bed.
So I set him on fire, which woke everyone up.
"AAAAAA!!!!!" he howled as he fled for the now open window. Which he didn't reach because now a Bronze Dragon was blocking it.
What? Where did that come from?
Rainbow Crash woke up groggily. "What's going..."
That was when a huge ringing alarm went off and rain began to pour down from the ceiling. ...
This washed the soot off Cruisin', who now turned for the door only to find Lyra blocking it. Lyra had tried to put her armor on and now was tangled up in it, lying in front of the door thrashing, but this effectively blocked escape, since the door opens inwards. "You'll never escape!" she said bravely but pointlessly.
"Oh, it's *you*," the Bronze Dragon said, irritated. "You shouldn't break into people's rooms! Now I'm stuck in this form for nothing."
Only now did I notice the Dragon had Bon-Bon's eyes. "You look great," I said, giving her a thumbs up.
"I just wanted to see my dear Rainbow Crash," Cruisin' said, trying to sound smooth.
"You came all this way for me?" Rainbow Crash said hopefully.
Lyra finally rose to her hooves. "I can see why Knight-ponies had squires," she said ruefully. "Why is it raining inside?"
Elves now broke through the door and hosed down everything with white foam. ...
"Dragon!" one of them said, pointing.
"That's just Bon-Bon," Lyra said. "I'm sorry, this guy broke in and everything went haywire."
"Hey, I just..." he began.
Then they hosed him down with more foam and dragged him off.
"Cruisin'!" Crash said frantically.
The foam began to dissolve into the smell of roses. "Sorry, we thought there was a fire," one of the staff people said.
I kept my mouth shut nervously.
"Here's a candy," Lyra said to Bon-Bon, fishing one out of her bags.
"I can't afford to waste them as I only have limited supplies," Bon-Bon said mournfully. "I'll sleep on the floor, I guess." Fortunately, she was only about the size of Celestia and not the size of, say, a Grand Wyrm.
She laid down on the floor and Lyra got her armor off and cuddled up to her and we went back to bed, though I could tell Crash was just lying there, staring at the ceiling and mumbling to herself.
"You need to give up and move on; he's a jerk," I told her.
"I can't give up any more than you can," she mumbled.
"Rarity isn't a jerk, she's just been suckered by someone charming." Like you have, I thought.
"I was made to love him," she mumbled.
"And he was made to cheat on you," I told her.
She made a noise and turned on her side and curled up in a ball.
I didn't know what to do. Beyond maybe find some way to get Marcus and Cruisin' to get exiled to the outer reaches of the Solar System or something.
Stupid playboys think they're so big.
I finally fell asleep and slept until morning. We said goodbye to Crash, who flew off home, probably to make up with Cruisin' and get suckered again.
Dammit.
We got the balloon going and headed up the river; there was more air traffic than I'm used to: flying chariots, people riding griffons, hippogriffs, manticores, flying carpets, blimps, flying ships, all cruising up and down the river; basically this river has cut a huge valley through the mountains which rise everywhere there isn't a river. And the river valley is thick with farms and villages.
Lyra had to dodge a few which didn't know how to steer very well; we also got a lot of people shouting at us for some reason, though we never did figure out why.
As we passed over Glantri city, a half dozen humans came flying up on a flying carpet; they wore official looking robes and one of them presented his badge, indicating he was a Flying Device Inspector. "Do you have a piloting license? Has this been inspected? I need to see your papers."
Lyra got fined fifty gold for flying without a license, but fortunately, they accepted the Equestrian Safety Inspection certification. She got fined another ten because she didn't have a license for her sword and another twenty for her chainmail, which basically left her broke.
I wish someone had mentioned all this! Lyra looked utterly embarrassed and pouted for the next two hours. "I should have known," she kept mumbling.
The whole area north of Glantri City is pretty heavily settled too with many little villages along the river and endless farms and pastures. Then, for some reason, the number of farms plummeted but you could see giant herds of horses and ponies and every so often, camps of tents, some of them quite huge. And sometimes you could see Ponies down there, helping humans to herd the horses.
"This is Krondahar, where Ethengars settled and took on some aspects of Glantrian culture," Lyra told us, sounding excited. "They face a lot of prejudice, but they're a big help to Glantri in defending against the wild Ethengars of the steppes to the east of those mountains." She pointed east to a huge wall of mountains which ran roughly north-south.
We watched them run and eventually reached a fork in the river; more precisely, where two rivers came together to form the one we'd been following; we turned northwest over Bergdhovern, which is mostly home to ruddy-skinned and haired humans, the Flaemish. Their homeland is naturally swampy, so they use extensive dikes to turn it into a mix of lakes and fertile farmland and canals and streams. We watched a unicorn and three humans repairing a dike; all the Ponies in Bergdhovern have red coats and manes in various shades.
"You know, I only saw Earth Ponies in Krondahar and only Unicorns here," Bon-Bon said thoughtfully.
"And there's Pegasi who live with the Alphatians in Blackhill. And there's a Pony Princesspality in the west," I said, pointing off vaguely west. "A loooong time ago, there were a ton of Ponies here, but most of them fled the monsters which ravaged the area and headed south; only the most magical or stubborn stayed behind."
"Yeah, the Elves here blew up some ancient artifact, right? And it rained down dark magic that mutated everything, turning it into a giant death trap, pretty much?" Lyra said.
"Yeah. There was some business with trolls and fillies and something..." I hadn't paid enough attention when Twilight was talking about it; anyway, it was over a thousand years ago.
"It looks safe now," Bon-Bon said hesitantly.
"The lowlands are mostly safe, especially around here," I told her. "That happened over a thousand years ago. The Dream Valley ponies were the only group that stuck it out here, which is why they have a Princesspality."
We kept going and gradually the land rose, though it was still lower than the mountains. The rice farms of Bergdhovern gave way to fields of wheat and potatoes and cabbages and pastures of cattle and sheep. We left the river behind and headed west to Rittenberg, the fortress home of Prince Jaggar.
Something began closing on us from behind; it was a huge chariot pulled by griffons; one rode in the chariot, holding the reins, while a huge muscular dark haired man sat on a throne, wearing a lionskin outfit. I knew the driver: it was Gilda. Well, this is going to be ugly.
Lyra steered left to let it go by; Gilda stared at us in that 'you look tasty' way that Griffons have. But she and her boss said nothing and just kept going.
Stupid Griffon. She's a meanie. And a jerk.
Then dragons began passing us. I tried to wave but they ignored me. *More jerks*.
Bon-Bon was scared at first, while Lyra was very excited. But gradually, we got used to it. I had never seen this many dragons at once; there must have been over a dozen!
The most baffling thing was that a Red Dragon and a Gold Dragon were flying together, having a race. A *race*. Okay, you may not know this but colored dragons and metallic dragons generally try to slaughter each other on sight. They certainly don't have friendly races.
The last dragon was an Amethyst Dragon like me! He circled us and then suddenly turned into a human, caught the edge of the basket, and flipped into it. "Hello, I am Sir Tarquinus from Caurenze," he said to me. "You look draconic, young lad, may I ask what you are?"
"Do you normally jump into other people's balloons without asking?" Bon-Bon said, frowning.
"Oh wow, are you a human who turns into a dragon or a dragon who turns into a human?" Lyra asked excitedly.
"I'm an Amethyst Dragon," I said proudly.
"Really? You're rather bipedal for a dragon," he said and now cast a spell.
"Hey, I'm talking to you," Bon-Bon said, frowning.
"I was hatched with wild magic," I mumbled.
"Interesting. Are you coming to the conference?" He continued to study me.
"Yes, I am giving a major speech," Bon-Bon said irritably.
"Bon-Bon's giving a major speech," I said, pointing to her.
He glanced briefly at her, then turned back to me. "Nice to meet you, then. I'll see you there!" He leaped out of the basket and sprouted dragon wings, while remaining otherwise human and flew off.
"Oh wow, partial shifting!" Lyra said, amazed.
"What a rude little monkey," Bon-Bon said irritably.
I had a feeling he knew something I didn't but needed to know.
Rittenberg is carved out of the side of a mountain, high above the plains; there was a large plateau we landed the balloon on; you could see a winding road down to a village at the base of the mountain; west and south of here, endless mountains rose, while north and east of here were the farmlands of Aalban, Jaggar's principality.
The sun was setting and you could see Vanya on the horizon, slowly rising, red against the darkening blue sky.
"Wow, this reminds me of Canterlot," Lyra said as she landed us.
"Well, it's a good design for a lair," I told her. "Very secure against assault."
The guards checked our papers and ushered us into the castle; we quickly went down a side hallway connected to the entrance hall and past endless rooms, then up two staircases to a nice suite of rooms with a double bed for them and a single for me in a little side room. For some reason, the closet for my room was full of maid costumes. For humans.
But I didn't bring a lot of luggage. We soon got everything squared away and they delivered us a bale of hay and a steak for dinner, so we all dug in and then laid down for some sleep.
********************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
In the morning, a servant came and took us to dine with Prince Jaggar. I put on the best of my dresses which Rarity had made for me and got Lyra all suited up. Spike put on his tuxedo, which I guess he is going to just wear until this is all over.
I had an odd feeling as we went through the castle; there's something strange about the rock here and it got stranger as we got closer to the Prince's quarters; maybe it was just the plush carpeting, which is a little awkward to walk on with hooves; it slides under you if you're not careful.
The dining room was small with a long but narrow table with benches suitable for us and chairs at the ends for Jaggar and Spike; it was a low table, perfectly suited for dining with ponies but probably somewhat awkward for humans. Jaggar wore a white suit and a monocle and had put out a potato and tomato soup for Lyra and I, while Spike had pancakes and scrambled eggs and sausage and Jaggar had a steak and fried eggs with some pancakes.
That weird feeling in the floor was even more intense now, but I decided it must be enchantments or something.
"It's a pleasure to see you again, Lady Bon-Bon, Lady Lyra, Master Spike," Prince Jaggar said solemnly. "I hope you did not have too much trouble on the way here."
"I forgot a bunch of things had to be licensed and I had to pay out a lot of fines," Lyra said ruefully. "I'm surprised they don't license the air you breathe."
"You had best stay out of Blackhill," Jaggar said, then laughed, so I laughed to be polite, while Spike just stuffed his face and Lyra looked confused.
"Oh, the Alphatians... right," Lyra said finally, then laughed and looked more embarrassed.
We ate and chatted about our trip and the conference. It's a collection of people with interests in dragons and shapeshifting, and I got the impression there was something he wasn't talking about, which worried me. But I laid out my plans while Lyra and Spike ate and he sounded approving, so I hoped I wasn't getting into the middle of something messy.
Right as Spike was about to ask something, the doors flew open and an old human woman in brown robes stormed in, followed by a walking statue which carried a huge book for her. She had darkish skin... not as dark as a Tanagoro but about the same as Marcus. Like a Thyatian. "Jaggie, that insufferable woman is at it again! I insist you must send her out of my house FOREVER." She pounded on the table, which caused Lyra's soup to jump up as she bent down, and now Lyra's face was covered with soup.
"Hey!" Lyra said angrily.
"Jaggie?" Spike said, then laughed until Jaggar glared at him.
Jaggar then turned to the woman. "Mother, do not call me 'Jaggie' and that woman is my *wife*."
I suddenly wondered why his wife wasn't eating with us.
"She sat at the head of the table! She won't pass the salt fast enough! And she sent away my Gregor!" Jaggar's mother said, pounding on the table again.
"Mother, as the Princess Consort of Aalban, she has the right to sit at the head of the table; you are now Dowager Princess Consort and she takes precedence, as is clearly laid out in the Blue Book," Jaggar said firmly. "While you sit to her right. And Gregor is no longer allowed to serve at meals since he added olive oil to my wife's tea." He sighed. "Lady Bon-Bon, this is my mother, Frau Hildegard, Dowager Princess Consort of Aalban. Mother, this is Lady Bon-Bon of Ponyville, an Alchemist who will be speaking at our Conference. To her right is Master Spike, familiar to Duchess Twilight Sparkle and to his right is Lady Lyra, Consort of Lady Bon-Bon."
Frau Hildegard made a brief nod of her head to myself and Lyra and basically ignored Spike, who frowned. "Gregor was innocent of all malice! It was not his fault that she misplaced the various flasks in the incorrect positions!"
"Mother, a colorblind elemental should not be serving at meals," Prince Jaggar said firmly, his moustache twitching. "I know Gregor has served you for many years, but I think it is long past time you allowed him to return to his home plane before he completely falls apart."
"I don't tell you what to do with your pets," she said, glancing at Spike, who now frowned deeply. "I will not abandon him. And anyway, the real problem is you married a woman unworthy of you!"
"I married the woman Father chose for me," Jaggar said, moustache now twitching furiously.
"Against my advice," Frau Hildegard said angrily.
I could hear someone approaching, probably the wife. Maybe I should have let Lyra talk me into buying armor after all.
Though Lyra's armor is in our room; she clanks too much when she wears it. And I'd assumed you wouldn't need armor at breakfast.
Two people came in; one was a balding human male with a thick moustache but a bald head; he had an odd green blotch roughly the shape of... well, just a blotch, really. The other was a woman in her early forties, with long black hair and very pale skin. Her eyes were silver irised, which made her eyes kind of creepy. Her long trailing dress somehow floated just a little above the floor despite being so long it should have dragged, and the man was followed by a clanking metallic human who was carrying two large satchels, one in each hand. "Ahh, there you are," the woman said to Frau Hildegard; her eyes looked almost made of ice as she studied the woman. "Frau Ingrid is quite worried about you, mother."
Wait, he married his sister? Or is that just a custom?
"Don't you have guests to attend to, Gertrud?" Frau Hildegard said irritably.
"They're all looking for you, worried you might have hurt yourself in your rage; you're not getting any younger, *Frau* Hildegard," Frau Gertrud said cooly.
"Wow, are you an air elementalist?" Lyra asked Frau Gertrud excitedly. "I can tell something magical is holding your dress up and I think it's an elemental!"
"I am versed in those arts, yes," she said to Lyra, a touch less cooly, then turned back to Frau Hildegard, taking her arm. "Come, Mother, we have guests and we're disturbing Jaggar."
"I'm sure Jaggie doesn't mind us being here," Frau Hildegard said, wrenching her arm loose.
"Mother, the guests will worry if you do not return," Jaggar said; his moustache was threatening to take flight now. "And I only have enough food for my current guests."
I now noticed that the man who came with Frau Hildegard had just been standing there silently the whole time. He now said, "Did I come too early, Prince Jaggar?"
"Yes," Jaggar told him. "Lady Bon-Bon, this is my friend Herr Rolf Graustein, Viscount of Blofeld; he is an alchemist like you and wished to speak with you after breakfast. Herr Rolf, this is Lady Bon-Bon of Ponyville, who I told you about, and her consort Lady Lyra and Master Spike, who serves Duchess Twilight Sparkle."
Spike rose and bowed to him and Herr Rolf nodded his head to Spike. But then he turned to me and bowed more. "A pleasure to meet you, Lady Bon-Bon."
"Nice to meet you," Lyra said cheerfully and I rose and curtseyed as best I could in this dress. Then I got back on the bench.
"I refuse to go back until she apologizes," Frau Hildegard said angrily, looking at Jaggar.
"I did nothing which is not within my rights as laid out in the Blue Book," Frau Gertrud said coolly, also looking at Jaggar.
I felt badly for Jaggar; few things are worse than being caught between your family and your lover; my parents complain constantly because they want grandchildren and that's not happening with Lyra and I. But I love her and that's that.
But I don't like fighting with them.
"Frau Hildegard, where are you....." a voice echoed distantly and Frau Gertrud sighed. "Did you forget your medication this morning..." Now Frau Hildegard grimaced. "Also, Gregor is trying to fly again..."
Frau Hildegard grimaced more and said, "I had best go see to Gregor." She now stalked off with her elemental book-carrier. The book was not blue, so I wondered what book they'd been talking about.
Frau Gertrud walked over, kissed her husband on the cheek and said, "I take leave, husband."
"I give leave, wife," he said to her. "I will see you at lunch."
"Of course," she said coolly and then glided out of the room.
Herr Rolf laid down a map by my bowl. "You can find me at the lab; I'll leave you to finish your meal."
I wonder how many times a day this happens.
***************
Lyra's Lyric:
Bon-Bon went to see Herr Rolf, Prince Jaggar took Spike for a private talk, and I decided to explore. To my surprise, you could see Vanya, large in the sky. It must be some special conjunction; it's normally invisible in the day.
Trying to whoosh myself to it didn't work. Given my armor and sword were in my room, that's probably for the best. I only did it out of habit.
A human walked up to me, very pale skinned, even more than Frau Gertrud, with short spikey white hair, sunglasses, and an elegant black tuxedo like Spike's. He had a wand in a holster on his hip. "Good day, young lady," he said cheerfully; I noticed he looked too young for a human to have white hair. "I am Baron Malachie du Marais, at your service."
He bowed to me, so I bowed to him. "I am Lady Lyra of Ponyville, here for the conference." I summoned my harp. "I am a Bard."
He now spoke magical syllables and became a white coated and maned Pony in a tuxedo. To my surprise, he had a cutie mark, though it was hard to see because it was a white wolf; you could only see one yellow eye and the black outlines of its features easily. "I am a wizard and the Baron de Morlay."
"Ooooh, from New Averoigne?" I asked, excited. "I knew a man, Jacques, from there, back home, when I was a child."
He said something about the moon over the river in New Averoignean; I know a smattering but it's mostly romantic catch phrases. There's a ton of languages in Glantri spoken by the micro-cultures and nowhere else; Master Five Star claimed many of these cultures came from other worlds or even other dimensions. It's certainly unusual for its diversity. Each of the four Principalities of the Quad-Province area has its own language! Fortunately, most people also speak Thyatian. As we had been doing.
"I'm sorry, I only speak a little, though I do know a song," I told him. So I got my lyre and played 'The Moon Rises Over the River' for him, which he clearly appreciated, stamping his hooves to the beat. I was surprised he could do it so well if he's normally a biped.
"Very good," I told him. "Used to four-legged forms?"
He smiled a lazy smile. "Yes," he told me, then stretched. "Have you been here before?"
"No," I confessed to him.
"Well, let me give you a little tour; I have been here several times," he said and began showing me around. It was a lot more interesting with a guide, I have to say.
***************
Spike's Saga:
Prince Jaggar had an entire library dedicated to dragons; he had models of dragons, pictures, charts, books, even an actual skeleton of an unfortunate kid dragon who died. I spent a few minutes just wandering around, looking at things. Then I found a model of two Amethyst Dragons, standing protectively over a little baby coming out of his shell. They were indicated as 'Winter Rime' and 'Gleaming Dusk'. "Who were they?" I asked.
"Probably your ancestors by about 2000 years. They perished in the fall of Blackmoor," he said. "They had some two dozen children and you are descended from their eighth child, Agate Eater." Jaggar was carefully polishing a golden statue of a red dragon with a cloth; I think that statue would piss off both red and gold dragons.
Agate Eater. What an undignified name.
"I don't... Twilight named me Spike, I don't know what my real name is," I said softly, half hoping he'd know but also wondering how he knew about my ancestors.
"You would have been named some time between hatching and your first Dragonsleep," Jaggar said, continuing to polish the statue. "Dragons wait and see what you are like before giving you a name." He then studied me through his monocle, which made me nervous.
"Twilight named me because of my ridges," I said thoughtfully. "They were like spikes on my tail."
"Perfectly natural. They'll become sharper with time," Prince Jaggar said, coming over and studying them intently through his monocle. "And become more backwards sloping. They discourage attack from behind and above, which is one of the gravest weaknesses of any dragon. For all the stories about soft underbellies, a foe who lands, say, here," he said, tapping the back of my neck at the base, "is very hard to attack."
"I guess... you've studied dragons a lot and I know you can turn into one," I said hesitantly.
"I am a dracologist. The head of the order, in fact," he said. "You are a great mystery to us, which is why I invited you. May I have one of your scales?"
"Okay," I said nervously, not sure if I would like the answer. "Do you know anything about... wild magic?" I asked hesitantly.
He grimaced. "It's terribly dangerous and foolish to monkey around with." I cringed at that. "I'm surprised more unicorns don't blow themselves to bits when they're little."
"What?" I asked in confusion.
"The ability of unicorns to generate power generally outraces their ability to control it when they are young," Jaggar said. "A definite flaw in the Blackmoorian research which gave them power. The end result is wild magic. I understand your mistress struggled for a long time to control her magic."
"Yes," I said. I have dim memories of awakening stuck to the ceiling; it took Celestia two hours to get me free. "But she is very good at it now."
"Wild magic is dangerous because it relies on emotion instead of the logic and reason of proper arcane methods," Jaggar said, beginning to stride back and forth across the room, past the table with most of the models on it. "Emotions can be kindled or doused but not easily controlled. The best emotion for proper control of magic is calm. If you become excited or depressed or angry, you can lose control. Wild Magic is too chaotic, too wild, too dangerous. So it is good that your mistress has learned proper control of magic. Still, from what I know of your story, I would not be surprised if you were changed by what happened when you were hatched."
I wondered how much Jaggar knew and how he found out.
"So I am not a normal dragon," I said softly.
"You are something new," he said excitedly, smiling for the first time I had seen him. "I know your parents were gravely concerned with the future of dragonkind. Your numbers have been slowly dwindling since the fall of the Dragon Empires and the imprisonment of the Carnifex. I fear that if that trend continues, one day there will be no more real dragons," he finished, then sighed. "That would be a tragedy. Some dragons are menaces which need to be eliminated, but there are others who are benevolent."
Carniflex... I heard Twilight... I was eating ice cream. "What were the Carnifex?" I asked.
"Relatives of dragons and dinosaurs and modern lizard men, they arose in the decadent phase of the Draconic empires and took over, then tried to conquer the world. They were devoted to Chaos and the Immortals imprisoned them forever," Prince Jaggar said. "A story which I've always wondered about, because normally the Sphere of Entropy would have vetoed that. So there must be more which we have forgotten." He sounded oddly like Twilight for a moment. "Anyway, your parents made several trips to the ruins of the Draconic Empires which survive on Davania, but I don't know their exact interest. What happened to their hoards?"
"My aunt and uncle have them until I am old enough to have my own lair," I told him.
He nodded thoughtfully. "I must attend to other business, but feel free to read anything." He nodded to me and I nodded back and was soon kneedeep in books, feeling weirdly like I was Twilight.
But when will I get a chance like this again?
***************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
Viscount Graustein had a huge lab; apparently he often stayed here at Jaggar's home, making golems with alchemy. And other experiments too; he showed me around and I discussed my methods with him, which my mother had passed on to me. We blew most of the morning trying to get troll-flavored candy to work; it kept trying to come to life and had to be burned.
I wish I was joking.
Or that I understood why he wanted troll-flavored candy. But after hours of work, including missing lunch, we finally had a troll flavored candy. It was dark green and had a hard shell with a gooey light green center and he loved it; I thought it tasted terrible.
And then he showed me some of his golems. His best one is his clockwork assistant, but he's developed a powder which animates them; getting them to obey is the hard part. And to actually function.
I'm not much good with stone work, but I tried to help him with a project which wasn't working; the limbs kept falling off. I tapped it, trying to read it through my hooves. "There's too many impurities in the stone, I think, but I'm not an expert," I told him. "The result is that your powder's magic doesn't penetrate the impurities and it malfunctions."
I probably would have missed dinner too but I was getting very hungry and a servant came for us. Everyone should be here now; there will be dinner and a dance and then tomorrow, the presentations start. Herr Time, Viscount Graustein's mechanical man, was kind enough to hold my note cards; I was going to speak briefly at the dinner. The words scooted off the surface of my mind and I wondered how exactly I, an ordinary Earth Pony, had ended up in a Prince's castle, giving speeches to wizards who are older than I am.
Lyra, I hope you are enjoying yourself, because I am going to die of nerves.
**************
Lyra's Lyric:
One of the things I learned today is that waterskiing is HARD when you're a pony. There's this hidden LAKE and you can get actual dragon turtles to pull you and go skiing! But it's very hard to hold on when you don't have hands. You can stick things to your hooves, but any kind of rapid turn and you may lose your grip.
But Malachie wiped out all the time too, so it was fun anyway, even when one of the dragonturtles mistook him for dinner. Lunch. You know what I mean.
Fortunately, I was able to get my suit laundered by dinner time and I changed and went to head into the dining hall, when four mares in very fancy blue and green dresses stopped me. One of them had a long pink mane and sky blue coat, though her dress hid most of it. "I am Countess Royal Blue. You must be Lady Lyra."
But she wasn't royal blue at all. She was clearly sky blue, which is a much lighter color. My mother would have been very cross.
Maybe her coat changed over time; that happens to some fillies. "A pleasure to meet you," I told her, bowing.
"You should be more careful in your dealings with the White Wolf. He is not a stallion to be trusted," she said, sounding angry. "As a consort, you should have more discretion, especially when your lady is present."
The last thing I need is snooty Glantrian ponies telling me what to do. "I'll keep that in mind," I said.
"Never trust a wolf," she said darkly, then raised her nose and stalked off with her handmaidens.
I now wondered again what his cutie mark meant.
So then I went to dinner; Bon-Bon looked a bit frazzled, so I nuzzled her gently, which got some whispers and then we ate. Jaggar's whole family was at his table, along with nobles I didn't know. I had seen Herr Sigisimund, the older son, at Canterlot, but Herr Roderick, the younger one (a teenager), was busy moping next to him; he was dark haired like both of his parents, but as pale as his mother Gertrud. His Grandma Hildegard was busy pontificating at Gertrud and pointing at Roderick, who squirmed. Gertrud glared at Hildegard and Jaggar clearly wished someone would invade from Vanya to get him out of this.
Or at least, *I* would have wished that in his place.
"But I am good at fighting," Roderick protested loudly.
"Swords are for the weak and ignorant," Grandma Hildegard said angrily.
I touched mine and frowned; hardly anyone here has one except the guards, I had noticed.
Jaggar's moustache twitched and he said, "Enough. We can discuss this later." He now rose and the speeches began while I ate asparagus, sliced carrots, and potato pancakes with lots of jam and honey.
Bon-Bon's turn to speechify came and I played an opening riff on my harp; that got everyone's attention. She touched her dress, then got a candy out and began talking about the problems of shapeshifting and keeping your sense of self. Then she ate the candy and became a human, talking about how she couldn't smell anyone now and her vision was different.
I also became aware a dozen of the guests were looking at her chest instead of her face and I frowned; the last thing I need is everyone making moves on my marefriend. She's so beautiful and she doesn't realize it, and she looks so graceful and elegant in that dress.
Some redheaded bastard was really leering at Bon-Bon, like he wanted to... do things... just the look on his face made me want to smack him. But I kept my mouth shut; I won't ruin her moment in the sun and Bon-Bon probably doesn't even know how to read human faces well enough to tell.
Then he looked at me and seemed ready to laugh.
Kiss my flank, bastard, I thought, grimacing.
A soldier ran in and whispered to Jaggar as Bon-Bon continued her speech; Bon-Bon now tossed me a candy and I ate it, trying to remember what she wanted me to turn into. Oh, right. I became a Belcadizian Elf; I could now hear that redhead drumming his fingers on the table to a beat; I couldn't figure out the song from that but now I began trying to.
I also noticed myself studying Bon-Bon more and tried to stop as it was not part of the plan. Bon-Bon said, "Behavioral changes can be subtle or quite huge; if I became a deer, I would likely panic and run. And the more you leave the general neighborhood of beings like yourself, the more you may be surprised by what happens. But I'll expand on this tomorrow when I give my main talk."
More speeches ensued and most of the people staring at her now stared at the new speakers and I relaxed. I guess it is normal for humans to look straight at whoever they're talking to all the time.
When we all went off to the ballroom, the redhead went off with Frau Hildegard; hopefully, he will do something foolish with her and Jaggar will lock him up before he causes Bon-Bon any trouble.
Bon-Bon licked her lips nervously. "I didn't think about this; this won't wear off for hours and I don't want to deplete my candy supply, though Herr Graustein told me I could use his lab if I needed to."
"It's fine, we can dance like this," I told her and in fact, soon we were dancing and having fun. Thankfully, the candy supplies the instincts.
The problem was the huge number of men who wanted to dance with her and Bon-Bon was too polite to say no and they ignored my best death glares; there were plenty of women to dance with, and I even danced with some actual mares, which amused me.
And I danced with Malachie; he was in human form and I have to say, quite a skilled dancer. He dipped me low and said, "You dance well outside your normal form." He was impressed.
I laughed as he raised me up and spun me. "I got top grades in all my bardic classes."
"Ahh," he said knowingly. "You should play with the band at some point." They were a mix of humans and elves and one Pony with a tuba.
Maybe I will, I thought.
"And keep an eye on that redheaded fellow, Emrikol. He's rather a dangerous man, from what I hear," Malachie said softly as he dipped me again, whispering in my ear.
I resolved to do so.
****************
Spike's Saga:
I got some serious dancing in but then I noticed Prince Jaggar's son moping around the edge of the room and I went over to him; I know just how he feels. "Hey, Prince Roderick," I said to him, holding a hand out. "I'm Spike. Nice to meet you."
He pushed his hair back. "Nice to meet you," he said softly. "You're Duchess Sparkle's familiar, right?"
"I'm her handler," I told him. "I make sure she doesn't decide to do research until 4 AM when she has to be somewhere at seven, make sure she remembers to eat, and so on."
He laughed, then nearly fell down; we scooted over a little to a clump of chairs and sat down. "Father can be like that, when he gets obsessed. My big brother too." He sighed, studying his brother, who was dancing with some blonde lady. "So what kind of wizard are you?" he asked wearily.
"All my spells go wild," I grumbled and his eyes widened. "I can't get them to work right."
"All mine either fizzle or go crazy too," he confessed. "Mother and Grandmother fight about whose fault it is all the time." He looked at his brother again. "I'll never be a great wizard like Sigisimund is."
"He's good?" I said softly. I'll never be as great a wizard as Twilight, but I'm a dragon. In the end, spells are gravy compared to that.
"He's great. I don't know if I could live up to that even if I *could* cast magic." I could tell he was getting more jumpy.
"Let's go take a walk," I told him. I felt terrible for him, so we went out to the gardens; Vanya was huge in the sky and I briefly worried it was on a collision course with Mystara. Twilight is probably observing this right now.
It has something to do with spatial distortions or something. Anyway, it only *looks* close.
I rambled on about some of my adventures, trying to cheer him up; the time I ate two tubs of ice cream got a laugh. We flopped out on the beach, looking at the stars. "You're the nicest dragon I've met; most of them are kind of rude," Herr Roderick said.
"I'm pretty cool," I said, stretching out and relaxing. "I'm surprised they'd be rude to you, given your Dad."
He sighed. "Dad has enough power they have to respect him, but most of them aren't as... well, they sit alone and count their coins instead of talking to people, but you live a normal life."
"Living with Twilight is anything but normal," I told him, but now I wondered. Were my parents trying to make me more social? As civilization recovers, there's going to be a lot less wild space for dragons to live in. Either we'll have to live with and around Ponies and humans and so on or we'll die.
I thought about Marjorie and how being in Pony form had shown her things she never knew and she hadn't even done it for long.
I should have talked to her when we were at the fortress.
"Dad doesn't rag on me like Grandma does, but he's just kind of given up, I think," Roderick said, sounding frustrated.
"You're still young. I think you'll find something to make him proud," I told Roderick, who sighed.
I wish I could do something for him but I can't even get spells to work right, dammit.
*****************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
I turned back into a pony RIGHT in the middle of dancing with some lord, who then fell down as I got heavier. I helped him up and tossed him one of my painkiller candies. I was very embarrassed.
I heard "AAAAQ!!!" as Lyra did the same thing and another lord went down.
I bowed to Henri and galloped over to serve them both a painkiller, just to be sure, then tried to help the fellow up. "Fixed durations are terrible," the man mumbled and wandered off to get some wine.
"I'm sorry!" Lyra shouted after him, then we nuzzled each other and went to get a little wine ourselves.
Just a little.
I'm not like that anymore.
Then we danced together for a while and then a herd of Ponies descended on us and I somehow ended up dancing with Countess Royal Blue. Who is more like sky blue, with a kind of pinkish-purple pie with a chunk missing as her cutie mark. You can hardly see it under her dress.
She looked hugely amused by something, but then turned serious as we knocked hooves and then retreated in step with each other; like many pony dances, this one involves mirroring your partner.
For a while, she made idle chit-chat, but I had the feeling she wanted to talk to me about something. I'm not sure what.
Maybe she expected me to raise the topic, but I barely know anything about her; I think I could find Dream Valley on a map but that's about it.
Maybe she's wondering how I can do magic candy when I'm an Earth pony?
I let her ramble on and danced; she's a good dancer, I have to say. It was very easy to follow her lead and she has a good sense of rhythm.
Lyra joined the band now and they moved into a slower, romantic piece; a lot of people cleared off the floor and it was just couples; I got some cookies with the Countess and she said, "Your consort is a fine musician."
"I first met her when she was sitting on a bench and playing music while I was working in the gardens." Candymaking is one of my jobs, but Ponyville isn't big enough to support me and Sugarcube Corner, so I sell them my candies and I also work in the town gardens. It isn't my Cutie Mark but ponies have a natural talent for growing things.
"Garden work helps me relax too during a long day," the Countess said happily and we talked about flowers and gardening for a while. Then she pointed out a white haired human. "You should keep an eye on him. I fear he may have be hoping to draw your consort into one of his schemes. He is not a man to be trusted."
I frowned. He did look like the slick type, all elegant and graceful. Like Octavia. Surely he wouldn't... but Marcus...
I resolved to keep my eyes on him. And ask Spike to as well.
Oh Lyra, the things you get me into.
****************
Lyra's Lyric:
Playing with the band was fun, but eventually, it was time to go dance with Bon-Bon, who was busy eating donuts and sipping what I hope was apple juice, because this is not a safe place to get drunk.
Though really, she doesn't get drunk anymore. I guess we're getting too old for that. She works every day and I have my duties too. It's kind of strange, really.
"You should be careful about that guy with the white hair," Bon-Bon said urgently to me, wobbling a little on her hooves. Maybe it wasn't apple juice. "He's dangerous."
"Hungry like the wolf?" I joked.
"Don't mock me," she said angrily as we retreated from each other, then advanced and knocked both our forehooves together. "I don't like how he looks at you."
Oh, she's jealous. "He's just a guy; he's not a pony and not even female," I told her. "Don't worry about it."
But I could tell she was and I didn't know what to do; Malachie was off dancing with a Belcadizian woman whose dress was covered with silver dragon motifs. Maybe she is a dragon. Or turns into one; this is dragon-fan central after all. I'm surprised Spike isn't in the middle of all this.
I suddenly wondered if Marjorie was here and twitched. There was a pink pony that looked oddly familiar but from what I have seen, Marjorie's pony form is not pink.
I studied the pink pony; she wore a white and yellow dress and did not appear to be a Cutie Mark Crusader or Pinkie in disguise. She was some sort of unicorn, it looked like.
I couldn't see Spike anywhere. "I think Spike is lost; I'd better find him," I told Bon-Bon.
She nodded and we split to search but couldn't find him, nor had anyone seen where he went.
That's not good.
***************
Spike's Saga:
There's something awesome about waterskiing at night, even if it gets cloudy and dark; the lights from the palace lit up the hidden lake enough for us to see, so I rode around on skiis, pulled by a dragon turtle with Roderick riding alongside me; they're so big, they can pull two skiiers easy.
We were laughing and having a good time when there was a huge boom of thunder and then lightning began striking. "Make for shore!" Roderick shouted.
Instead, the dragon turtles dove and nearly pulled us under; Roderick and I bobbed to the surface just in time for a lightning bolt to strike the surface; I screamed and coughed up flame as Roderick hurled me into the air and then lightning *hit him*. It was like the world was going in slow motion and then I came down and the lightning crackled and struck one of the towers of the palace.
I could hear Bon-Bon shouting my name and I knew we were so dead, assuming Roderick was alive to be killed. "Roderick!" I shouted frantically.
He grabbed me and swam for shore, throwing me onto the beach when another bolt came down. Then he managed to flop up onto the beach.
Holy cow, he's tough! Bon-Bon was coming towards us as the rain began to pour, her dress plastered to her, her hooves driving dirt into the air. "What are you two idiots doing?" she said angrily. "Even Pinkie has more sense than going on the lake in a rainstorm."
"I wouldn't bet on that," I mumbled.
"I'm sorry, Lady Bon-Bon," Roderick said, bowing. "It was my idea; I talked Spike into it." He tried to look dignified, but you can't when you're soaking wet.
She sighed. "I know it's easy to feel invincible at your age but..."
*Lightning hit him AGAIN*.
Bon-Bon and I stared and he sighed. "It's my only trick. I'm pretty much immune to lightning."
"Thanks for helping me," I told him, feeling embarrassed. I wish I had a trick beyond making spells malfunction! "We'd better go in."
"Yes," Bon-Bon said, though now she looked thoughtful as she herded us inside.
Well, it was fun *until* the storm.
***************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
I had an idea, so I steered Roderick to the kitchen and had him make us all sandwiches, observing him carefully, my hooves to the ground, feeling out the furniture and the cutlery and utensils he was using. I had a feeling. Beyond the weird feeling the floor of this whole palace gives me.
The sandwiches were exceptionally good and I smiled a little and engaged him about his cooking. Which he isn't supposed to do because it's for servants. But he's good at it.
I told him to meet me in the morning, before breakfast. I had ideas.
I slept well and met Roderick in the gardens and did some work with him; he was good at that too and I felt a growing sense of certainty.
I don't really understand human biology but I think maybe something happened to him the way happens to pony families; sometimes two Earth Ponies will have a Unicorn or a Pegasus because of past ancestors who mixed the three groups. It happens to the other Ponies too.
He must be some kind of 'Earth Human' where his magic flows into what he makes instead of normal spells. I'll have to see if he can make something special.
I don't know if his parents will like this, but he'll never be happy trying to be a unicorn when he's not. But this way, he can be happy. And doesn't everyone deserve that?
But first, I had to go to the conference.
We had a breakfast speech by Prince Jaggar and then a series of sessions; I attended one with Spike on young dragons which was very informative, done by Frau Elise, a Flaemish sorceress who used illusions to illustrate her points. Lyra went to the session on draconic music; I actually heard her playing at one point, which surprised me.
Spike went up to ask Frau Elise questions, while I galloped to the room where my session would happen. I passed Frau Hildegard, taking a moment to curtsey to her; she nodded to me and I galloped on, wondering why she looked so smug.
I reached the room where my session would happen; I had to struggle against a press of people coming out, then got myself set up; Lyra finally managed to push through to join me. One of the first people to come in and sit down was the man we had seen on our way here, the man in the lion skin outfit and he had Gilda with him, which didn't make me happy; the last thing I need is a Griffon staring at me angrily the whole time. I tried to ignore her, but she had her head turned, one eye staring right at me the whole time.
Well...
People gradually drifted in; watching people jockey for the seats closest to Prince Jaggar was amusing; I'd noticed everyone had tried to sit near his wife in the first session; it must be a human thing.
I double-checked the aquarium and set out my candies. I checked my notes four times and drank some water, trying to avoid getting even more tense. I was glad Rarity had made me an extra dress; my other one is in the castle laundry thanks to me having to stop Spike and Prince Roderick killing themselves being young and foolish.
Okay. I talked to Fluttershy, did some reading and practicing, and now I'm ready. I have to be ready. Really, it ought to be her; I don't understand why Jaggar wanted *me* of all people.
I started off by talking about how I make my candies and all the things I can do with them, and then I took one and turned myself into an eagle; I flew around the room, and then landed on a perch I had set up and talked about how my eyes were set forward, changing how I see the world from when I am a pony with eyes set more to the sides; the eagle's eyes look forward to focus on prey and...
Lyra threw a mouse into the air and I took flight and caught it, then gobbled it up instinctively. Gilda twitched and I smiled a tiny hawk smile. "I couldn't eat that as a pony, not so easily; my pony teeth are for chewing plants, not meat and the bones would be a problem." I spat them back up. "And this would make me feel gross, but like this, it's natural."
I saw Hildegard herding Roderick past the entrance to the room and wondered where they were going.
But I had other things to do.
Then I flew over to the fish tank. Lyra tossed me another candy and I became a fish and fell into the tank, while Lyra delivered this part of the speech for me, about the way a fish body feels, the way the water is like air, like flying, the need to keep moving so water goes through your gills, and everything.
Lyra nailed it, to my relief; when she's serious, she's really good, a better public speaker than I am.
Then I swam deep and pushed myself to leap into the air, right as I ate another candy I'd suspended in the water; I came out of the water and turned into a wolf in mid-leap. I shook myself dry, trying to avoid wetting the front row too much, then gave a great howl and dogs came flooding into the room; I talked about pack instincts while most of the wizards instinctively panicked. Except the guy in the wolf skin, who laughed very loudly and looked approving. Gilda laughed as well, watching wizards scurry. Jaggar, I noticed, didn't panic, but did look a little worried.
I quickly organized the dogs and led them through the room, spreading more panic then got them to howl together, and sent them out and took on human shape.
"Changing shape is more than just a change of your flesh. Senses, how you think, what you want... it all can change. It's easy to lose yourself." I wanted to talk about what happened with Jaggar, but I didn't want to embarrass him in front of everyone, just glanced at him, then got ready to give my example by becoming a dragon myself.
I was right about to take another candy when suddenly Lyra said, "Prince Jaggar, something hugely magical has happened outside in the gardens. It's still going on."
Jaggar frowned and rose, casting a spell and his eyes widened. "We are under attack! Some sort of strange Mantis-men are pouring through a shimmering gateway in the gardens and... MY SON!" He cast a spell and teleported.
"Mantis... The Thri-Kreen are invading!" Lyra said excitedly. "Someone opened a Dragon Line! HAHAHAHAH!" And then she galloped off towards the gardens.
Utter chaos now ensued with wizards taking off flying, shapechanging, teleporting, casting defensive spells and generally running around like chickens with their heads cut off, though I could see guards flooding towards the gardens.
I didn't know what to do; I had to help but I'm not a warrior or a great mage.
And then I realized what to do.
******************
Lyra's Lyric:
I cast a spell on my sword, covering it in shimmering lights that will confuse people. Being a bard is awesome.
The gardens were in chaos; you could see a kind of huge glowing tunnel in the air, arching upwards towards Vanya, huge in the sky; evergrowing hordes of Thri-Kreen, huge mantis-men warriors, were pouring out of it, facing the shieldwall of Jaggar's guards. The gardens were being trampled... Bon-Bon won't be happy. Various wizards were flying around, blasting things, turning things into other things, getting shot out of the sky; it was very exciting.
Prince Jaggar was flying, trying to study the portal and figure out how to close it. So I pitched into the fray, attacking people just coming out of the Dragon Line with my sword, held remotely, throwing chaos into them and slowing their entrance. Confused Thri-Kreen bumbled around, and now Jaggar's guards began pushing the others back. Oh yeah!
Jaggar continued doing fancy glowy things that didn't actually... oh, he's divining where it connects to! Divination magic can tell you all kinds of stuff if you actually pay attention in class instead of thinking about kissing Octavia.
Ahahaha.
But I didn't need magic; this was clearly a Dragon Line; you basically activate these special stones and they become connected by a portal. Which means someone from Vanya must have brought one here!
"Prince Jaggar! This thing was opened with a Portal Stone!" I shouted to him. "If you destroy it, the gate will close!"
He nodded and began scanning with this rushing wall of blue energy; you could see all sorts of runes briefly appear in it as it washed over people.
But then something I had worried about came to pass. A huge six armed stone statue came rumbling out of the Dragon Line; it's a Thri-Kreen Juggernaut! They can kill six of the poor Pishkaro at a time! (The Pishkaro are the peaceful original inhabitants of Vanya, before the Thri-Kreen invaded from another world. They are NOT Potato People, whatever Bon-Bon says!)
More wizards were coming out and they opened up on it, but Juggernauts are made of magic-resistant stone and it ignored them and began tossing guards around.
See, Tom Wagonmaker can fight these things, because he has a sword made of the same stuff, and it can cut them but my sword is just a sword.
I began trying to think of a plan.
*****************
Spike's Saga:
I'd been following Baron Du Marais after the first session, when he'd slipped off deep into the palace; I lost him when he went down a dumbwaiter but I managed to find him again, just after he'd broken into Prince Jaggar's library.
He had a big book on the table and it was sitting next to another book, busy copying the other book onto its own pages; it was kind of cool and Twilight would love this. But I had to stop him.
"Stop, thief!" I said angrily.
"Now, now, it's not theft if you leave the original," he said, waggling a finger. Then he cast a spell at me, so I breathed on his book, sending it to Celestia; I ended up frozen in place, but he lost his prize! HAH!
He stared in shock, then sighed and extracted several pieces of paper from his pocket. "Well, I did not expect that. You are full of tricks, young man."
I tried to laugh but I was paralyzed to my frustration.
He worked on copying things, but it was much slower this way and then alarms went off and a voice began announcing the castle was under attack.
"Dammit," he said, frowning. "I fear I must make my exit now. Please tell Lady Lyra that I enjoyed meeting her and she will always be welcome at my castle." Then he gestured and vanished in a burst of flame.
And me? Still paralyzed! Aaargh!
*****************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
Herr Graustein was busy rallying his golems when I ran in. "Hello, Frau Bon-Bon," he said. "I am about to lead my functional golems to battle." He looked wistfully at his malfunctioning stone golem.
I licked my lips. I have an idea, but it involves me having to go into battle and I'm not a fighter. But Lyra is out there risking her life and so is everyone else, and I can't hide.
But I still had to take a few seconds to muster the strength to even make the suggestion. This could be dangerous. Even drunk, I rarely got into fights. And I'm stone cold sober right now.
They need me. "I have an idea." I clambered up onto the one which keeps breaking and I extended my Earth Pony senses into it. One of the nice things about my candies is that while I don't get the magical abilities of anything I turn into, I keep my Earth Pony magical abilities. "I think I can adjust for its flaws and keep it going." And this human body can go places my pony body would struggle with (and vice versa, mind you.) I basically sat on its shoulders, legs around its neck and arms around its head.
Slowly, Stony lurched forwards; I kept pushing as best I could, to overcome his flaws and together, we marched forwards into the fray. Herr Graustein cast some kind of spell on me, putting a glowing field around me; this soon turned out to be intended to protect very squishable me from attacks; hurled javelins bounced off as we plowed into the fray. I relaxed a little after that.
I had not counted on having to go head to head with a six-armed giant stone statue monstrosity. It was huge and dangerous and I was screaming THE WHOLE TIME while Stony whaled away at it and it tried to pull Stony apart while the other golems pounded on it.
Then Jaggar turned into a Sapphire Dragon and pounced on the monstrosity and held it still while Stony gradually pounded it into small bits.
Once the monstrosity died, Jaggar-Dragon was enraged, utterly enraged and began bashing mantis-men everywhere, just running wild in an angry frenzy.
"Prince Jaggar, be careful before you lose control completely!" I shouted to him.
Instead of listening, he plunged into the huge glowy sky tunnel thing the mantis-men were coming out of. "Wait, come back, don't let the dragon-anger rule you!" I shouted.
There was a sudden BANG and the ground exploded nearby and suddenly the glowy tunnel collapsed.
"Oh no!" Lyra shouted. "I think that was the portal stone!"
I don't know what that is but it can't be good.
*****************
Lyra's Lyric:
There was worse news; Frau Hildegard and Prince Roderick were missing. And to my embarrassment, Malachie had apparently tried to steal secrets from the library and gotten away with some of them. He seemed like a nice guy, dammit.
"Someone planted that, and we must assume it was Baron Du Marais," Frau Gertrud said grimly.
"Do you know why Frau Hildegard took Prince Roderick there before it happened? They must have been there when it went off," Bon-Bon said, still riding on the golem.
Frau Gertrud grimaced. "Probably another crazy scheme to try to enable him to cast spells properly." She sighed, looking down at the ground. "I will study this stone and try to trace it back, so we can attempt a rescue."
She got everything organized and I grabbed one of the larger juggernaut chunks, taking it to the smithy. I want a proper sword. So I'll be ready next time I run into one of these things.
Because I am definitely going on the rescue.
I wonder if we'll see Tom Wagonmaker.
**************
Spike's Saga:
Frau Gertrud was quite unhappy when I told her what happened. "My husband will be quite cross with the Baron when he returns. Thank you for your valiant effort to stop him; at least now we'll know what he wanted." She sent Celestia a message via me, and Celestia sent back the book, also via me. Which was a little rough; it was big.
It was information relating to the Carnifex, it looked like; I took a look at it but it was kind of complicated blather about ancient high priests and stuff and I had to struggle to stay awake.
Something about how the dragons made them as an experiment, after some vision of the future.
Anyway, I trailed around after Frau Gertrud, trying to help her out; she must be pretty shaken up but she was putting on a brave... well, okay, she was kind of cold and unfriendly and calm all the time but I think that's just how she is.
"Hey, do you know a mage named Darien?" I asked her. "Darien Aendyr?" I'd like to meet someone who hates Marcus as much as I do.
"He is my cousin, the son of my father's brother," Frau Gertrud said, then frowned. "Married some crazy gorilla of a Karameikan for reasons I don't understand."
Sounds like the kind of person Marcus would be friends with.
"So why is your husband into dragons so much?" I asked her.
"It is a family tradition," she said to me. "Two dragons who had fled their own kind had a lair here once, and when refugees from Thyatis and Alphatia came here, they convinced them to intermarry and become my husband's people, the Aalbanese. They died long ago, but they passed down secrets to my husband's ancestors, secrets of Dragon lore and Dragon magic, which they have guarded ever since."
"So... wait, does that book talk about how the Carnifex were made? The one he was copying?"
"Yes," she said softly. "And it would be a great horror if they were made again, for they were so evil that even Entropy itself consented to their imprisonment. Only twice has a civilization been wiped out like that."
I wondered how on Mystara anything could be that evil and I shivered.
I watched her studying the broken stone, wishing that I could help but afraid to try anything magical for fear of another crazy magic surge. "Do you know, is there any way for a dragon to learn magic before he gets the magic he gets from aging?" I asked her.
Maybe it's just me because of how I was hatched. When she gave me the same spiel that Dawn Gleaming did, I winced. It is me. "But a human couldn't do it that way... why does the number of fingers matter?"
"Keratin," Frau Gertrud said, tapping her fingernails and then my claws, "conducts magical energies. This is why Ponies can do magic through their hooves or horns or wings, why humans do hand gestures and why spells adapted for five fingers must change for dragons or griffons or other sentients," she said. "If you tried to do spells adapted for a human, the result would be unpredictable at best."
But I couldn't even make spells adapted for Spikey work. But he was hatched differently... Dammit. "Hey, that's what my scales are made of, right?"
"Oh yes, it's among the reasons Dragons are so powerful; as you age, you will channel more and more magic into your scales all the time, making you harder and harder to hurt." Her voice was getting a little excited as she spoke, which was strange. She gently ran a finger along my crest, then pulled her hand back. "I'm sorry, that was rude."
"It's okay," I said, shivering a little. It had felt almost like a current of power, while she touched my crest.
"Hmm, something odd about the flow of power there," she said. "May I?"
"Okay," I said, dreading the answer. "Hmm, ponies have hair all over their bodies too... I guess humans do too but it's less obvious."
"Hair is too diffuse. The energy dissipates. Unlike a scale or a fingernail or a claw or a horn," she said. She now studied me with a glowing circle in front of her eye. I shuffled nervously on my feet. "Have you been exposed to chaos magic?" she asked.
"At my hatching," I said, feeling as if I might suddenly burst into flame at any time.
"Interesting." She shook her head. "I must focus. Before they do something terrible to my husband or my son."
"Or your mother in law," I said hesitantly.
She snorted, then turned back to studying the portal stone. "Please bring me some wine."
That I could handle.
**************
Bon-Bon's Tale:
I've never worn armor before; Herr Graustein got me actual enchanted chainmail armor from the armory; it had spells that made it as light as my dress. I'd be more comfortable in pony form but I can ride the golem more easily as a human, though it's harder to use my abilities that way. I also brewed up some more of my special candies, which he assisted me with. Now I understand why my family saved some of these crazy flavors.
Lyra got them to make her this humongous stone sword out of the remains of that dead golem. Then she discovered she couldn't actually pick it up because it resists her magic. So they had to lock a gauntlet onto it and she lifts the gauntlet with magic, which lets her swing the sword.
She is so excited and I am scared out of my mind. "Armor!" she said excitedly. "MAGIC armor!" She pranced about as if it was some kind of expensive dress to show off. She did something and it shimmered, making her hard to see. "Oh yeah!"
"Lyra, this is going to be dangerous," I said urgently. "It's not one of your books where you can just read it and never get hurt."
"We'll be fine," she told me.
I wish I could be so sure.
War.
Me in a war.
This makes the time Berry and I woke up on top of a train headed for Dagwood, North Dacoata look sensible.
But I can't let Lyra and Spike go alone and I want to be a good guest. You shouldn't leave your hostess in the lurch when she needs you.
I am so nervous, I don't have words for it. I gave Lyra an assortment of candies and Spike as well, then explained them. I'd color coded the wrappings and prayed they would remember but they were both busy being excited about going into battle.
I can't understand that.
But I will do my part to help out.
**************
Lyra's Lyric:
I offered to carry Bon-Bon into battle, but Spike was going to ride me instead, since Bon-Bon has to stay human and ride the golem. Man, a giant war golem at your command. That's cool incarnate, but she seems kind of cranky she has to even do it.
I would totally love to do that but I can't. Hmm, I wonder if Bon-Bon could control a golem made of nullstone...
A lot of the convention guests fled; that seems kind of rude to me, but I guess a lot of them weren't armed with combat magic and their spellbooks are at home. Or maybe they just don't have any manners. Our warparty looked like it was going to be myself, Spike, Gertrud, Rolf, his golems, Bon-Bon, Jaggar's sister Brunhilde, Franz (the wizard in the lion skin) and his bodyguard Gilda. Gilda eyed me like I had eaten her eggs or something. Franz had enlarged her and rode on her; Brunhilde turned into a white dragon and Rolf rode her, while Bon-Bon rode her stone golem and Spike rode me. Gertrud summoned an air elemental and rode on it, appearing to ride a mini-tornado. She cast a spell and the stone reformed and then the Dragon Line formed and we plunged into it; the stone stayed behind with Herr Sigisimund, who had to stay to avoid risking losing the entire family in one day.
We landed in a temple; I recognized it from the huge statue of a six-limbed Thri-Kreen warrior standing over a fallen foe. Pak-cha is an Immortal of the sphere of Time, who leads the Thri-Kreen in war against their foes and enslaves their enemies. He's important to their survival in the harsh desert environment of Vanya. Ever since the doom gates opened at the poles, the world has been overheated and dried up; water flows only in oases and the grand canals and along their shores. It's a dangerous place.
The temple was heavily damaged and smashed up and they'd somehow chained up Dragon-Jaggar with null-stone and were using him to haul stones; you could see Frau Hildegard and Roderick in shackles of the null-stone, doing the same work.
"The chains neutralize magic," I said. "But I can cut them with this sword!" Bon-Bon, Rolf, Franz (the lion skin mage), and Gilda lead the golem charge, pinning down the main body of warriors in the temple, while Brunhild took on the priests in a duel of dragon against cleric, scattering them with arctic blasts of cold.
And I circled around the fight with Spike, charging in to hack Jaggar free, but he pointed at his mother and Roderick, to my surprise; they can't do half as much as he can, but... but it's his mother and his son.
I nodded and Dragon-Jaggar began thrashing, keeping his keepers busy, while I hacked loose Frau Hildegard and Roderick, Spike driving back their guards with bursts of flame.
Then Frau Hildegard gave a cry of anger like a lion on fire and gestures, runes appearing around her hands, and four of the support pillars for the roof formed into huge angry earth elementals. ...
"When I get back, I am burning Baron Du Marais' estate to the ground for lying to me about how that thing worked!" she shouted; I felt my stomach curdle. "The way he laughed at me when the thing opened the portal and then he teleported away... HE WILL REGRET THAT!"
"Roderick!" I said and threw him my normal sword. He now began fending off Thri-Kreen charging us as the temple began to fall apart around us. In fact, his blows sent Thri-Kreen flying; he's stronger than I realized.
Spike frowned and scratched his head, looking confused about something.
I could see Bon-Bon on the golem she'd named Stoney, going toe to toe with the Pak-cha statue, which had come to life. But it was driving her back; it was even stronger than the one they'd sent through to the estate.
While Frau Hildegard began scattering our foes in the larger fray, she didn't seem to even notice the danger to her right here and right now. Spike had to guard me while I hacked Jaggar free.
"RETREAT!" Dragon-Jaggar shouted.
"I am not leaving until I destroy them all!" Hildegard shouted, gesturing at her golems, which began smashing the other pillars; the whole temple ceiling is going to fall on us at this rate; the part her golems had held up now came crashing down and bright sunlight shone brightly into the temple, making it hotter.
That's when a giant sand-worm came through the wall, trying to swallow Dragon-Jaggar, but he was too big for it; now they thrashed and wrestled around; another pillar fell and part of the ceiling collapsed, taking out the Thri-Kreen riding on it. So now it went TOTALLY berserk.
Roderick was knocking Thri-Kreen about, but there was only one of him and more closed in on him and Hildegard, who only cared about destroying EVERYTHING. Rolf got clocked and went flying and his golems now ringed him for defense while he laid stunned on the ground.
Brunhilde had flown up through the hole in the roof and was busy fighting some kind of giant winged bat creature... bat creature? I don't remember any bat-creatures in the books. Gertrud and her elementals were now fighting the priests, while the warriors came at the golems around Rolf.
Pak-Cha struck Stoney in the chest and he broke into pieces and Bon-Bon went tumbling and laid there, stunned. For a few seconds, I could only stare in absolute horror. She didn't even want to be involved in all this and now she's hurt.
I felt utterly sick to my stomach. Bon-Bon! I tried to charge over, but a half-dozen warriors cut me off and drove me back as I desperately fended them off and Spike spat flame at them. And now Frau Hildegard had been grabbed by some of the Thri-Kreen too, while Roderick was pinned down fighting three others. I didn't know what to do! BON-BON!!!!!
****************
Spike's Saga:
Only one choice. "AZKABIBBLE BOBBETY BOO!" I shouted, gesturing wildly and praying for something useful to happen. I hadn't planned to mess up the words, it just happened.
A huge wall of sound hit both our foes and ourselves; we went tumbling across the temple but so did the warriors in front of us.
I couldn't hear; Lyra said something to me, trying to get up but I couldn't hear her. Then I had an idea; I made a gesture like a person cracking a whip, then I grabbed the yellow candy and turned into a huge snake like Slither.
Lyra somehow got this right and let me lash onto her, then extended the front of me to the rafters with her magic; I lashed onto it and we swung OVER our foes to land by Bon-Bon; the good news was that the statue had moved on to attacking Gertrud and her elementals; the bad news was that two mantis-men had grabbed Bon-Bon and were carrying her to the altar.
I know what happens on altars. We charged after them, snake-whipping over another wall of foes, but now they had a priest trying to figure out how to get her armor off to sacrifice her; she was tied down and now EVEN MORE Mantis-men came at us. How many of these things are here, anyway???
But I had a plan; Bon-Bon was stirring, trying to get free. So I reached into the bag she gave Lyra, pulled the lemon candy and hurled it into her mouth.
Then I ate one of the red-hots and drove back our foes with SUPER FIRE.
And that's when Bon-Bon turned into a bronze dragon and broke the altar under her weight.
******************
Bon-Bon's Berserkergang:
You really can't imagine the power of a dragon until you become one; I could feel the power in the ground, in the air, in the sunlight, flowing into me and I laughed, scattering the priests with a swipe of the tail. Then I took to the air, seizing a candy with my tail and popping it into my mouth. The warriors looked quite confused when I breathed fire at them. That's a red-hot for you!
I took out another pillar, trapping more of our foes below rubble, then bomb-dived warriors trying to pull down Gertrud, who leaped onto my back and directed her elementals from there. I just started smashing everything, determined to punish them all for attacking us, for tying me to an altar, for RUINING my presentation!!!
I was busy popping candy and smashing things when Gertrud said to me, "I think we've won."
But that wasn't enough, I had to level this whole damn place so they never attack us again!
There was a whole city here, I could see now. This was going to take a while.
Jaggar had turned back to human form for some reason. He was shouting something but I couldn't hear him.
"We need to retreat," Gertrud said to me; she'd clambered up my neck to whisper in my ear.
"They tried to sacrifice me!" I said angrily.
"We can't fight a whole city; we have to go now while we still can," she said urgently. "You should turn back."
"I can't change unless I eat another one," I told her. "And I can take them," I said confidently. "I'm a dragon."
"I've been a dragon," she whispered to me. "You feel so powerful, like you can do anything. But even dragons have their limits, as many evil ones have found at my husband's hands. Look down."
I could see Lyra; she looked utterly mortified and was trying to shout to me, with Spike shouting too; but there was so much noise, I couldn't hear them.
A dragon, I thought. And her husband too.
My brain put two and two together and got four.
Now I really understood. I landed and Gertrud hopped off me, landing by her son, who was breathing hard and watching more warriors pour in.
"There's thousands of them," Gilda said to Prince Jaggar. "You can stay but it's my duty to get Herr Franz out of here."
"I will cover the retreat," I said. "Lyra, I need a vanilla snowflake."
"Bon-Bon, I'm so sorry, I didn't think..." She looked very shaken up. "You could have died and it would all be my fault," she said miserably.
"I'm just an ordinary pony," I said softly to her. "But you make me extraordinary. It's okay, I'm not mad at you." I chose to get into this.
Then she flung me the vanilla snowflake. I make these for the weather ponies normally; but it will do.
Lyra passed the portal stone to me. "It will close up behind you as you go."
I nodded and tucked it into my saddlebags, which now clung to one leg.
They fled down the tunnel and I stood, ready for the onrushing horde. Then I showed them something they'd never seen. I could feel the coldness inside me from the candy and I let it out, powerful dragon lungs expelling cold that froze everything in its path, turning moisture inside me into snow that covered everything in white.
And when they all fell down or retreated in confusion, I fled down the tunnel.
You know, they've probably never even seen snow before.
**************
Lyra's Lyric:
We were all gathered in the gardens; Jagger had used his magic to dispel the polymorph candy, so Bon-Bon and Spike were back to normal.
The portal stone had a rune on it which I recognized from the books. "This is the rune of Tch-Tchi'ka. He's a trickster immortal of fire and deceit and turning your enemies against each other," I said. "The whole plot of _Master Mind of Vanya_ revolves around his followers trying to trick three city-states to fight each other so the Thri-Kreen who follow him will then conquer them all."
"Isn't that fiction?" Bon-Bon asked, frowning.
"Fiction based on a real place as we just saw!," I protested. "Anyway, we studied the planets at Celestia's School for Talented Unicorns and I learned enough to know that Edmund Wheatfurrows is a very accurate author!" He claims that Tom Wagonmaker is real and sends these accounts to him, which he rewrites. I don't know if that's true, though I hope it is. But I am a Bard, and I have to know these things!
"It could be a double-bluff," Gilda said. "Intended to make you hunt down the followers of Tch-Tchi'ka, while the real guilty party laughs at having suckered you." She scratched the dirt with a claw, forming a crude image of a rearing horse ridden by an archer. "Look, the Krondaharians did it!"
"Given time, I can study it and try to determine exactly how this thing got here and how it was activated; I may be able to read its timeline or perhaps consult an astral sage," Jaggar said.
"Doesn't Contact Other Plane sometimes get lies?" I asked, a little worried.
"No divination is perfect," Jaggar said. "Mother, what exactly were you and Roderick doing here when the stone activated?"
"I know who did this," Hildegard said angrily. "Baron Malachie du Marais! He gave me the stone and showed us what to do and then he left us to die!"
"He can't have," Spike said. "I was following him after the first session and he went to rob Jaggar's library! He couldn't have been giving you the stone during that."
"You took a magical artifact and blindly activated it without divining it first to be sure it was safe," Jaggar said flatly, moustache twitching.
"He demonstrated it on one of the servants! Her kind can't use magic either," Hildegard said flatly. "But she can now, so I suppose she'll want to move out now." The last sentence came with a sense of growing surprise. Then she frowned. "But she's probably a con-woman and it was all some trick!"
Bon-Bon pursed her lips and made a noise and I glanced at her, but she didn't say anything.
Jagger muttered a few words and sent a tiny dragon flying off into the castle and then looked around the gardens. "Tell me exactly what happened, Mother."
******************
Dowager-Princess Hildegard's Entirely Accurate and Honest Account Which Proves She Is Innocent of All But Malice Against Gertrud, Who Has It Coming:
Malachie du Marais, Baron de Morlay, is a very charming man when he chooses to be. He approached me about the problem and demonstrated in my quarters on one of the servants that this artifact my son is holding could give magical ability to someone who could not possibly have it.
How, you ask? She was an Earth Pony, and as all know, they cannot use magic.
**************
Bon-Bon's Rebuttal:
"I most certainly use magic and have been certified an Arcaner by your own government," I said, flashing my temporary magic license. "I believe you've seen examples of my arts today. Because we had to rescue *you*."
Spike laughed very loudly; Gilda glared at him and he caved in on himself as he continued to ride Lyra.
"Fine. But you don't cast actual *spells* like we do," Frau Hildegard said angrily. "Out of a book, not a wand, before you challenge me again. I know an Earth Pony can use a wand if a real wizard charges it up for them."
"Applebloom *made* a wand and a giant flying treehouse. I make magical candy. Pinkie makes magical desserts. I *am* a real wizard," I said angrily, flashing my license. "As recognized by your own government."
I was not sure why Lyra was smiling so much at me but... why am I complaining? It was nice to have her support.
"Applebloom made a wand?" Lyra said, amazed.
"Yeah, but she's studying under Keraptis, even calls him 'Uncle K'," Spike said.
Jagger's moustache vibrated and half the people present twitched, tugged their hair, or rubbed their forehead.
"I could take him," Gilda said confidently.
"I am not sure if anyone here but Prince Jaggar could take him," her boss, Herr Franz, said. "Perhaps if we all rushed him at once, somehow luring him out of the mountain..." He clearly was planning this inside his head.
I see why he hired Gilda.
"Look, Father," Roderick suddenly said. "Grandmother and the Baron or whoever it was brought me out here with that stone and he told me to say 'Asharak Gorkaras Minyanastho' while standing by it and the portal opened and people charged out and grabbed us." He sighed and stared at the ground. "I just wanted to be like everyone else in the family and not the freak. I should have thought things through but we were stupid and listened to him. I just wanted to be normal," he said weakly.
"You're not a freak," I told him firmly. "There's more than one way to be a wizard. And I think I understand why you can't use spellbook magic. But I think first we had better find that servant and see what was going on. Assuming she wasn't a unicorn in disguise who has teleported to Darokin by now or something."
"Yes," Jaggar said. "My friends, thank you for your support. You can come with us, but anyone who wishes a rest, they can go to their quarters while I investigate this."
"I had best get my golems taken care of. Lady Bon-Bon, can you come by my lab later? We should talk," Herr Rolf said to her.
"Of course," I told him and then we all headed into the castle.
*************
Spike's Saga:
The investigation posse turned out to be me, Prince Jaggar, his mother and his wife, Roderick, Bon-Bon, and Lyra. Everyone else went to handle the clean up, rest, etc.
The maid in question turned out to be named Shimmer Shine; she was an Earth pony with a Cutie Mark of a really clean window. However, she was oddly translucent, like she was made out of glass; her coat was a sparkling blue and her mane a vibrant green. It was styled in this kind of weird way, like I saw in some book of Twilight's a while back, all piled up and pinned in place; she had a Von Drachenfels badge pinned to one of her black boots, which went up to her knees; all the servants wore high boots, but she was otherwise unclad, except for a bandage around her chest and another over her right eye socket.
"She was injured in the fighting, sir," a cat-headed human... maybe he was a Rakasta... said. He was dressed like a doctor, white coat and all. He idly licked his hands to get blood off them and I made a face.
"I have healing saliva," he said curtly to me. ...
"Prince Jaggar, I am sorry," Shimmer Shine said, tears in her eyes. "I didn't realize... I don't understand... it worked for me."
"Holy... you're a Crystal Pony! I thought they were extinct!" Lyra said.
"I just thought I must have enchanted myself," she mumbled. "I'm a normal pony from Dream Valley."
"She turned that way when she used the artifact," Frau Hildegard said curtly.
Frau Gertrud frowned at Frau Hildegard, but said nothing.
"What's a Crystal Pony?" Bon-Bon asked curiously.
"The Crystal Ponies were Earth Ponies who were transformed when Glantri got blown up way back and they fled to the Adri Varma Plateau instead of fleeing south to modern Equestria or east to Ethengar or the Northern Reaches," Lyra said. She concentrated and an Earth Pony village appeared; purple glowing ash rained down on the village; many died and the survivors became creatures made of crystal and fled because the land could not be tilled.
The image flickered and the Crystal Ponies crafted a beautiful city of crystal, formed like a pentagon with a star inside it; there were palaces at each corner and in the center. "They dwelt there for a very long time. But when Nightmare Moon eclipsed the Sun back in 1 AC, General Sombra, the head of their armies, betrayed them and led an army of Hydrax to conquer the city." The image changed and you could see Sombra, a shadow in the shape of a pony with red eyes and dark blue armor set with opals. Unlike the earlier images, he was weirdly two-dimensional and flat. He led a horde of monsters and Shadow Ponies into the city.
"Sorry, that's the only surviving picture; it's from a book," Lyra said apologetically. "The princess fled to the Silver Palace and it vanished before Sombra could storm it. Then the city itself vanished when the eclipse ended. A few Crystal Ponies escaped this but everyone thought they had died out," Lyra said, continuing to stare at Shimmer Shine in amazement. As she said this, you could see the city and then one of the palaces, made of silver and crystal vanished. When it vanished, the rest of the city started to fade, and then the sun came out and it evaporated entirely.
Lyra finished by saying, "They had all sorts of strange magics, and it's said that during her rule of the Empire, the Princess would become an Alicorn."
"That's impossible," Bon-Bon said, frowning. "Alicorns are divine; you can't turn into one just by being crowned."
"Well, Sombra planned to crown himself and become an Alicorn and then it all went poof, so maybe you could but the Immortals shut down whatever did it," Lyra said hesitantly. "But I totally had to answer a test question on this."
Jaggar now cast detect magic; I know because it's one of the spells I messed up. He cast another spell and a spellbook appeared, which he made float in the air by her. "Cast this spell," he told her.
"Okay, this becomes that and that thing is this, so this goes this way..." she said. I could feel my scales tingling.
"What are you doing?" Jaggar said. "There's a lot of magic around your hooves but it's very emphemeral."
"I don't have any fingers, so I have to convert it to hooves and I'm not very experienced, sir," Shimmer Shine said nervously. "Okay, here we go." She kneeled on her haunches and waved her hooves in the air and chanted and now a tiny dragon appeared like the one Jaggar had summoned earlier; it circled her head and she whispered to it. It flew over to Jaggar and whispered to him, then vanished.
Roderick sighed and Bon-Bon whispered to him and his eyes widened.
"Lady Lyra, if you will cast a spell?" Jaggar said thoughtfully.
I wanted so much to help but I would probably break Shimmer Shine or turn her into a duck.
The cat licked his hands again, making me nervous.
Lyra began to sing and play her harp and now roses rained down from the sky, though they soon vanished.
"Your forehooves have been altered to resemble the functioning of Lady Lyra's horn," Jaggar said, frowning. "It would take tremendous power to do that and make it permanent. Your very nature has changed."
Gertrud, Hildegard, Roderick, and Lyra all shivered in unison, then looked at each other.
"That's big, I take it," I said.
"The Crystal Ponies could work gemstone and rock and crystal magic through their hooves even more potently than a normal Earth Pony but were weak with green and growing things," Lyra said. "Only the Princess, who had the powers of every kind of pony, could cast book magic... spell magic... at all. Though if the legends are true, Sombra somehow gained the powers of a Shadow Pony with the help of Thanatos."
"Who?" Bon-Bon asked.
"The head of the Sphere of Entropy, one of the few Immortals to walk alive out of the Immortal Storm at the end of the Godswar that killed off most of the previous 'generation' of Immortals," Lyra said. "The Karameikans believe he's one of the Five Fiends of the Five Hells."
"Your Cutie Mark is related to window cleaning, right?" Frau Gertrud asked, suddenly changing the subject.
Lyra blinked, looking confused. "It's music."
"I meant Shimmer Shine," Frau Gertrud said.
"Oh yes, I clean glass easily and perfectly," Shimmer Shine said more cheerfully. She turned and picked up her saddlebags, which hung over one of the ends of the bed she'd been on when we arrived. She flicked out a bottle and a sponge, sprayed the window with the bottle held in her tail and then put it away and did a single wipe with the sponge and the whole window was clean.
"So that is still the same," Frau Gertrud said thoughtfully.
Further tests showed, however, that she had lost the physical strength of an Earth Pony and the agility as well, unless she was cleaning, though she could still feel the ground as Bon-Bon did. In fact...
"Prince Jaggar, there's some sort of strange field in the stone," she said urgently.
"You felt it too? I asked one of the Glantrian ponies and they didn't notice anything," Bon-Bon said hesitantly.
"It's probably the enchantments on the castle," Prince Jaggar said. "This place was heavily shaped by spell magic, Earth Ponies, elementals and many other things."
Frau Hildegard frowned. "Hold on." She kneeled down, placing her hands on the stone and chanting softly. Some of the stone formed into a little man who said, "Hello, Princess."
"Has anything happened to change you recently?"
"I suffered some damage this morning but otherwise, all is normal," he said.
She patted his head and he melded back into the floor. "You must be feeling the magics, but..."
They called in the castle's mason and his entire staff, which included an Earth pony. "Glantri has so much magic, it can confuse visitors," Hard Hat said. "I went to Equestria once and it all felt really weird. I guess every country has its own kind of flavor of magic down in the Earth."
"We are on a tangent, anyway," Jaggar said, sending the masons back to their work. "I know nothing of the Crystal Ponies, so it may be that he somehow turned you into one, which could mean anything. Given it did not turn Roderick into a Crystal Pony, however, I assume that whoever impersonated the Baron actually used some other means of magic to transform Shimmer Shine and they are responsible for the artifact, whatever immortal they may serve."
"Why turn her into a Crystal Pony and not a Unicorn if you have that kind of power?" I asked. "Also, didn't you see her change? I'd worry about turning to crystal myself."
"Her spell worked. I just thought this was some sort of Pony thing," Hildegard said, waving vaguely. "Also, she didn't turn that way instantly, it kind of crept up on her and by that time it was too late."
"I thought I'd done something wrong but I also got it to work," Shimmer Shine said weakly.
"And I was desperate," Roderick sighed, face in his hands.
"So, we're more or less stuck at this point, unless we can track the fake Baron," I said.
"Gertrud and I will go to my library and see what we can figure out; you should all rest. Mother, never, ever try something like that again," Jaggar said firmly. "Roderick, I understand your desperation but you have to be more careful." He sighed. "You can at least use some items for self-defense. You were suckered by a cunning enemy, but remember, people got hurt over this."
Roderick now looked like he just wanted to die and I felt terrible for him. I know I've done some stupid things, trying to prove myself.
"Prince Jaggar, I have a theory about why your son cannot use magic," Bon-Bon said hesitantly.
"It's because of the tainted blood of the Alphatian witch," Hildegard grumbled; Gertrud stared coldly at her, clearly not happy to be called that and I can't blame her.
"Mother, do not refer to my wife as tainted," Jaggar said, moustache twitching.
"Prince Jaggar, how long has your family practiced Dragon magics?" Bon-Bon asked.
"Over a century," he said hesitantly, studying Bon-Bon curiously.
"So generation after generation of Von Drachenfels have saturated themselves with the power of dragons," Bon-Bon continued.
"Yes," he said.
"And you have mastered it so greatly that you can become a dragon," Bon-Bon went on. "As has your wife. Spike, how old can you expect to be when you learn spells?" Bon-Bon said.
"Well, we get a natural talent for it after the second Dragonsleep, around fifteen to twenty years of age," he said. "I can produce wild magic now but I can't get it right."
Roderick is around fifteen or sixteen, I think.
"Roderick, pick up Lyra," Bon-Bon said more confidently.
He did so easily. I remembered him knocking around Thri-Kreen as if they were children's toys as he held me over his head.
"Let's go to the lab," Bon-Bon said. We went to Herr Rolf's lab where he was busy repairing his golems. After saying hello to him, she coached Roderick through making one of her magical candies, then ate it and spat fire like Spike. "He couldn't make these successfully if he couldn't channel magic. I am not a spellcaster, but I command magic through my chemical arts. Through physical things. Frau Hildegard, who activated the portal stone?"
"Roderick did," she said, frustrated. "Which we've already established."
"Lyra, can anyone use a Portal Stone?" Bon-Bon asked.
"You have to be able to channel magic in some way," Lyra said. "They aren't charged items."
"I don't know if he'll eventually learn formal spells, but he is a user of magic, just in different ways," Bon-Bon said, then suddenly turned back into her pony form. "He may be able to work wonders none of us can, with the dragon magic that must have coursed through him since... maybe even since before he was born."
Prince Jaggar teleported out and returned with a pair of rings and passed them to his son. The rings began to glow and his eyes widened. "I never even thought... Spike, try these on."
They glowed for Spike too, and then Jaggar collected them. "It seems whenever we meet, I learn something new, Lady Bon-Bon." He looked almost abnormally calm.
"It's still her fault," Frau Hildegard said petulantly.
"Mother, if you were not my mother, I would send you to the dungeons," Prince Jaggar said calmly. "Roderick, tomorrow, you will need to come to my library; we have many things to test together."
Roderick shook and his eyes misted and then he smiled. "Of course, father."
I have to wonder why Jaggar never figured this out himself. It seems like a logical theory, right? I guess since this didn't happen with their elder son, they didn't think of it.
"We will go to study my library," Jaggar said. The rest of you should go rest.
"I will come with you," Hildegard insisted. "I can make the walls speak."
Gertrud frowned but Jaggar nodded. "A good point, Mother, thank you."
We all scattered, though Bon-Bon stayed in the lab and I went with Prince Jaggar because I was a witness. Also, I sent Celestia a letter from Jaggar about the robbery, Crystal Ponies, Shimmer Shine, and the Baron.
Hopefully, she'll reply soon.
**************************
Bon-Bon's Meeting:
I helped Herr Rolf work on repairing his golems for a while; it's not my strong point but I am an Earth Pony and we have a knack for such things. They were all torn up and I felt sorry for them; it's fortunate they can't feel pain.
He thanked me, then said, "I am a member of a society of alchemists; you have demonstrated a great degree of skill in this art in a way previously unknown to us, so I would like to offer you membership."
"Me? Really?" I said in surprise.
"We could use more members who have your skill and..." He laughed nervously. "Anyway, I can call a meeting if you are interested."
We talked about the group for a while and I said yes. I could use membership in a trade organization and I'm always looking for more ideas I can use to make new candy so I don't just rely on what Mother passed down to me.
Though I am worried about what he cut himself off on. But it won't hurt to meet them.
****************
Lyra's Lyric:
I ended up talking to Shimmer Shine in my quarters; I was curious about her abilities, as we only know a little about Crystal Ponies, and I wanted to tell her the rest of what I know about them, since she may now be the only one.
"How do you know how to convert spells made for hands to your hooves?" I asked her.
"I... isn't it instinctive? I just *knew* as soon as I used the artifact... or whatever exactly happened to me," she said.
Like the candy but with magic... Bon-Bon's candy, you keep your normal magic but gain the *body* of your new form, so you can get stronger but a unicorn's horn won't give you magic.
It wasn't the same as having a hoof somehow function AS a horn, either. For one thing...
I did a light spell, which floated in the air. "Okay, did you see how I did that?"
"No," she said, frowning. "I can kind of feel there is magic there but I couldn't tell what or how."
I got Spike's spellbook and had her try the light spell in that and she did it on the first try; she tried to explain how she knew, but it was like she was trying to explain how you tell your legs to move.
Was this a Crystal Pony thing? We only know scraps of information, really. They fell right around the time civilization was finally recovering from the fall of Blackmoor and then Nithia.
But Unicorns aren't born understanding the use of our horn; that's why we have Magic Kindergarden. Otherwise, we just make a mess if we try to do magic.
Someone did something really powerful and this bothers me a lot. I hope Princess Celestia can get to the bottom of this.
**********************
Spike's Saga:
Okay, Prince Jaggar has these crystals hidden in his library that record everything that happens, so he was able to see what all the Baron looked at and confirmed my report. I bet they're like those spheres Dash has.
Also I got to wear a crown that belonged to a dragon king 3000 years ago!
Admittedly, on me, it's not even a belt, more like a loopty-loop. Which I am pretty good at if I say so myself.
He looked fairly disturbed by the things which the Baron had been trying to copy. "This is about the Carnifex, right?"
"Yes. No one knows where the Castle of Twilight stands which is their prison," he said. "Beyond 'the Pit of Banishment'."
My eyes widened.
He blinked at me, then smiled. "No connection to Duchess Sparkle, of course."
I gave a sigh of relief. "I'll tell you some time about that stupid Staff of Twilight and why you shouldn't grab the first book with a friend's name on it for a birthday present." But not this time, because I don't want to remember that.
Gertrud was busy poking around, looking for something and then I remembered. "If Countess Royal Blue hasn't left, she was trying to warn us against trusting Baron Malachie for some reason," I told him.
"She is a friend of Dame Genevieve de Saphora, the great enemy of the Baron; they've been sparring ever since Castle Amber re-appeared," Gertrud said, sighing. "The Baron is a rogue, but I did not think he would go this far. But I will go see her." She kissed her husband's cheek and departed.
"He's not crazy enough to try to bust out the Carnifex, right?" I said weakly.
"He's not powerful enough; he would die," Jaggar said flatly. "Steal information and sell it to someone else, that he could do. But then, I thought he was not powerful enough to pierce my defenses or to somehow turn an Earth Pony into... whatever she is now. Crystal Pony with spell hooves..." He rubbed his forehead.
"If you can do that, why not make her a unicorn?" I asked.
"I don't know," Jaggar said, frowning. "But hopefully your mistress or Princess Celestia will know something about it."
********************
Bon-Bon's Greeting:
Princess Luna made a grand appearance that night after sunset with echoing music rolling across the mountains as she descended out of the sky in a chariot pulled by Bat-Pony guards. I am not sure if they're a special kind of Pegasus or if it's just special armor and things. A pink unicorn accompanied her; she has red, yellow, and purple streaks in her mane and tail and she wore a countess coronet and yellow hoof-guards. She had purple saddlebags with Twilight's Cutie Mark on it... is that Twilight? But Twilight is a Duchess. The music came from the rig of a white DJ Unicorn pony crammed into the back of the chariot and from a cellist pony, Octavia.
I felt my bile rise. Why did Princess Luna bring that *waste of oxygen*?
"Her most regal highness Princess Luna has arrived," one of the guards said in a deep voice as the chariot circled over the courtyard.
"Prince Jaggar of Glantri greets and welcomes Princess Luna. Permission to Land is given from one Prince to another," Jaggar said formally.
"Spikey! You look so cute in your tuxedo!" the pink unicorn shouted, just before the guard or Luna could reply. "I'm going to have to hug you a lot!"
I stared, Octavia stared, Luna twitched and Prince Jaggar's moustache twitched too. But the DJ and Lyra laughed loudly. Most of the assembled court just stared in amazement. And Spike buried his face in his hands.
"Oh Cadence, never change," Lyra said cheerfully.
"Who is she?" I asked as the ceremony *tried* to continue.
"A very prestigious graduate from Celestia's school; she sometimes taught classes there and I think she foalsat half the class when we were little, all the ones from Canterlot. I guess she's Countess Cadence now," Lyra told me quickly.
Cadence was vibrating, clearly eager to hug Spike to death; I couldn't help but smile as Octavia stared at her in shock and the DJ smirked and Luna tried to pretend she was alone on her chariot.
The chariot finally landed and Cadence basically trampled Spike, hugging him while he flailed and squealed, though he did hug her back eventually. The greeting ceremony went on another twenty minutes, ending with everyone having a glass of wine; Lyra was kind enough to hold my glass for me.
Then most of the people went to their rooms and duties and we were taken to a meeting room with plush velvet covers on the chairs and scenes of battle between wizards and monsters on the walls. Prince Jaggar laid out the story and presented Shimmer Shine to Princess Luna.
"Octavia, play the note I taught you," Cadence said more calmly to her. "Vinyl, you must duplicate and adjust the tone up one octave and down one octave."
"Can I help? I am a bard," Lyra said.
Octavia looked at me and smirked; I avoided eye contact, but I could *feel* her smirking. She thinks she's so big.
Lyra soon was worked into this and a series of notes which made me feel strange floated through the air; Shimmer Shine glowed in various ways and looked discombobulated. Cadence circled her, now looking very serious and rather surprised. "She is a Crystal Pony," Cadence said softly. "I am not sure what has awakened her heritage beyond very powerful magic, however."
"Shapeshifting magic of extremely high caliber," Princess Luna said, studying the portal key. "There are traces of it on the portal key. And I can confirm that the power of Tch-Tchi'ka was used to make this portal stone but that the shapeshifting came from some other source, which is to say, someone stole this and then rigged the spell they used to transform Shimmer Shine to it, so it would go off in place of the portal. Once it fired off, then the portal could be used normally."
"I am so sorry," Shimmer Shine said, looking miserable. "I failed the Prince through my desire to rise above my station."
"There is nothing wrong with aspiring to rise to greater things," Cadence said firmly. "We are made to lack and to seek to overcome that lack and become more than we are. You had no way to know."
Prince Jaggar sighed. "You were injured in defense of my people and paid for your mistake in blood. I consider things settled between us. Good luck studying and qualifying for Arcaner status," he said solemnly.
She bowed to him. "Thank you, sire."
Hmm, I will have to see about getting my license made permanent if I join the trade association. We meet tomorrow.
"So how many people are on the short list for who could have done this?" I asked.
"I would suspect an Alphatian," Princess Luna said. "Simply because it has a lot of very powerful wizards. I will have to do some research."
I could feel Octavia being smug without even looking at her, but I tried to ignore it. She thinks her bow-tie somehow makes her high class.
*Bow-tie*.
"Lady Bon-Bon," Prince Jaggar asked. "Am I correct in thinking your shifting candy does not convey magical abilities?"
"You are correct, you retain your native ones; I have Earth Pony strength in human form, for example," I told them.
Now Octavia looked displeased, and I smiled. I am a Lady. And you can only play your instrument because of your cutie mark, so there.
"I have sent a request to Prince Etienne," Prince Jaggar said. "Some of his vassals have a great deal of knowledge of such matters."
There was a sudden whooshing sound and a spiraling pillar of smoke appeared and out of it stepped an old man, dressed in fancy burgundy and green robes with a pointed hat on his head covered with stars; he had a staff in one hand and something about him made my body twitch. He positively reeked of that weird feeling of 'Glantrian magic'. "Good evening. Princess Luna, from one exile to another, it is a pleasure to see you," he said, taking her hoof and kissing it. "I see you remain the most beautiful of the children of the night." She smiled at that. He took his hat off and nodded his head to Prince Jaggar, then put it on. "Good evening to you, Jaggar, it's good to see your moustache has not achieved independent life yet but is still working on it." Said moustache twitched furiously.
"Prince Etienne, it is customary to appear at the gate or above the castle and signal for proper entrance," Prince Jaggar said firmly.
"Now, now, we need two more Princes or Princesses so we have enough to pose for a proper card deck, Jaggar. Perhaps Dona Carnelia or Prince Volospin..." Prince Etienne said, then began studying Spike. "Hello, young fellow, it's a pleasure to meet you, I am Prince Etienne d'Amberville, Prince of New Averoigne."
Spike shook his hand; Prince Jaggar's moustache twitched. Princess Luna said, "Prince Etienne, we need to confer about shapeshifters." She explained about Shimmer Shine.
"Since this person raided a fellow Prince of Glantri, I will see about producing a list for you, though it won't be very long," Prince Etienne said.
I suddenly wondered how he had known to suddenly show up and frowned. Had he been scrying us?
"Do you have time to tell us about why your castle vanished and reappeared?" Lyra suddenly asked excitedly.
"I'm sorry, young lady, if I told the whole story, Jaggar might be forced to smile and that would destroy the universe, I fear," Prince Etienne said ruefully. "I think he swore an oath."
Jaggar sighed. "It is not relevant to the investigation and too long a tale."
"I will send Dame Sephora your way as well; she's skilled in counter-agents against werecreatures and a skilled alchemist. I think she was coming this way anyway," Prince Etienne said vaguely.
Oooh, that could be useful. She must be in the Trade Association.
"Anyway, I should go before Jaggar is forced to have the ceremony of kicking out a guest who overstayed his welcome," Prince Etienne said. "Shimmer Shine, you should think about attending the Great School for training now. I would be most interested to work with you and your unique style of magic. Everyone, have a pleasant evening!" And then he vanished in a puff of smoke.
"Great School?" I asked.
"He is the head of the Great School of Magic, equivalent to Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns," Lyra said.
"Larger and for many sorts of magic users," Jaggar said. "And uses his age as an excuse to bypass formalities, like being invited." He sighed. "Luna, I will arrange quarters and show you around. Everyone, thank you for coming and rest well tonight."
Formalities ensued; Cadence took Spike with her as she went with Luna and crew; I decided to get some sleep and Lyra did too.
****************
Lyra's Lyric:
Bon-Bon went off to meet with some alchemy group she wants to join, while I had breakfast with Princess Luna and her group. "Hi, everyone," I said excitedly. "Did you figure out who to stomp while I was sleeping?"
"We are going to have to go to the Adri Varna plateau and investigate if anything is going on," Princess Luna told me as one of the servants laid out a bowl of oats for me. I dug in as she continued. "Vinyl's abilities should enable us to find any traces of Crystal Power."
"Really?" I said curiously; we were in school together, but I don't remember her having any interest in such matters.
Vinyl looked up from her oats. "It's all a matter of vibrational harmonics," she said with a more serious voice than usual. "Crystals vibrate; I can produce the deep vibrations which trigger responses by converting Tavi's music. If someone is monkeying around with what's left of their power, then we'll find it."
I waited for Octavia to kill Vinyl for using a nickname for her, but nothing happened.
What? She hated the nicknames I tried to give her.
I want to go, but Bon-Bon is going to want to go back to Ponyville, and I do need to get that stupid song written, even if the festival isn't for nearly another month.
"Is Shimmer Shine using Crystal Magic?" I asked.
"No, though she should be able to learn how to use it," Luna said, frowning. "It may prove impossible to be sure who actually did this. Prince Jaggar's major enemies are not known to be able to do this. And I keep wondering why not just set off the stone without risking someone being able to stop you..." She frowned. "There's some elaborate bluff and double-bluff going on."
"Could it be Cunning Thought?" Spike asked, looking up from his plate of sausages and pancakes.
"It could be, but Mother would normally show up and gloat; it's one of her weaknesses. She can't *just* be clever, she has to shove it in your face and get recognition," Princess Luna said, frowning.
"Couldn't we go after the Baron, though?" Spike asked.
"Attacking Glantrian nobles is a good way to cause a diplomatic incident, since he committed no crime against Equestria except for paralyzing you," Princess Luna said to Spike apologetically. "I have no authority here beyond the respect I command for my power and rank in Equestria. Jaggar hopes to prod Etienne into action. One of Glantri's major problems is the difficulty of enforcing the law against those with the power to cause the most trouble." Princess Luna sighed.
Spike sighed. "So basically, diplomatic immunity."
"Yes. He is a Baron," Princess Luna said.
Maybe I could sedu... no, I have a fillyfriend.
I spent the rest of breakfast in search of a plan.
*****************
Spike's Saga:
Prince Jaggar wanted to see me after breakfast; he took Roderick and I down a hidden staircase in the library. I'm kind of stunned he's showing this to me. But I felt proud too!
We descended to a huge laboratory. "I am going to see if each of you can perform a secret art, one of the foundations of our studies."
Roderick shuffled on his feet, nervous but excited.
"I'm born ready!" I said eagerly.
Okay, I can't *tell you* the secret, but what it does is you generate a circle around you which bans Dragons from entering! I got it on the first try; Roderick flung himself out of the circle the first three times, including landing on me, but he finally got it up (and stayed in it) and I tried getting into it and just bounced off.
"Very good," Jagger said, then looked thoughtful and did it himself; we couldn't get inside it to save our lives.
We practiced this until lunch; I had lunch and instantly fell asleep, utterly wiped out.
*Totally worth it*.
****************
Bon-Bon's Initiation:
I would like to tell you about the meeting, but it was a secret! Suffice it to say, I decided to sign up with the Alchemy Society, and traded lots of information. I also got a magical labcoat, which seems to be more or less the standard garb of the society. I also spent some time working with Herr Rolf on repairing his golems and making some batches of candy.
"You will need to go to the Great School for a permanent license valid anywhere, though I'm sure Jaggar would certify you for Aalban," he told me.
Having joined this society, I should have enough business in Glantri to make it worth it, so we discussed that for a while, until lunch time; I then went to have lunch with Prince Jaggar, his family, and Princess Luna and her followers, and of course, Spike and Lyra.
"We are heading to the Adri Varna Plateau to make sure there's not some evil overlord of the like building a fortress there and turning people into Crystal Ponies and the like," Cadence said cheerfully. "If you'd like to join us."
Octavia was busy eating a rather nice looking tomato salad and being her usual smug self. Ugh. I'd have to deal with her but I can tell Lyra wants to go and if Princess Luna needs me...
"If you need us, Princess Luna, we will go. I take it everything's stalled out on the question of who is behind this?" I said.
"For now, I will have to do some intelligence work once I have a better list of who could have done it," Princess Luna said. "And I wish to be sure nothing strange is going on where the Crystal Empire once stood."
I am a little nervous about this; I'm not a country girl, despite being an Earth Pony and part of me worries that Shimmer Shine was turned into a Crystal Pony to lure us into a trap.
But I trust Princess Luna's judgement.
She is a princess and I am an ordinary Earth Pony who doesn't deal with this sort of thing all the time.
***************
Lyra's Lyric:
I have to say that Vinyl has a *sweet* soundboard. We spent the first few hours of the flight just monkeying around with it (with headphones on so we didn't deafen everyone). You could simulate lots of instruments, so Vinyl, Octavia and I did all sorts of musical pieces with just the board; you can tell they're fake, though. Or at least, I could; Spike couldn't tell the difference and Bon-Bon spent the whole time shrunk down by Luna so she could ride in her own saddlebags and study 'secret texts' she got from her new Alchemy club buddies. I am *very curious* but I guess I shouldn't complain since we were Music Clubbing it up out here.
Spike was asleep, having had too much for lunch, cuddled up to Cadence, who was just doting on him like he was her own kid. I guess once a foalsitter, always a foalsitter. And then, as we flew over the mountains west of Prince Jaggar's territories, she began to sing a low, sad song in a language I didn't know; we all just listened, though I could see Vinyl was recording it. Princess Luna started in surprise, then joined the song and I felt the urge to sing it but I didn't know the words; I joined the chorus, at least, and so did Octavia and now we began to play it as we picked up the tune. Vinyl just listened, her eyes hidden behind those goggles she wears, her hooves tapping the beat.
"What song was that?" I asked.
You could now see dry hills to the west of us, rising towards a high plateau, though not as high as the Equestrian Plateau; this one looked a lot dryer and rocky than ours.
"One of the refugees from the Crystal Empire wrote a song about its fall," Cadence said, patting Spike as he slept.
"It didn't just vanish to the Hollow World, did it?" Vinyl suddenly asked. "I know some places about to be destroyed get moved like that."
Princess Luna made an unhappy noise. "That requires some foresight that doom was coming; it happened so fast no one could respond to it, as other things were going on elsewhere," she said softly.
Like the Nightmare Moon crisis, I know. I didn't pay as much attention to Equestrian history as I should have, as it wasn't as cool as the weird exotic stuff in the rest of the world. I know the most important stuff, but I was more interested in new places.
Like this freaky plateau; the air got colder and dryer as we went upwards and the whole place was a wasteland of scrub grass, sand, rocks and cacti forests. I got a weird feeling from the local magic that made me uncomfortable; Vinyl began fidgeting even more than usual too. I wonder if what Bon-Bon was feeling was like this to her.
"What's this weird feeling?" I asked.
"Entropy is strong here," Luna said softly. "The fall of the Crystal Empire devastated this land, which had been made green and beautiful by its power. The powerful bonds of friendship and love between the Crystal Ponies generated huge amounts of magic, with which they reshaped the land. But when Sombra betrayed them and the city vanished, then came the night."
We flew over a lake covered with green scum and I stared at it. "What's that weird... That isn't a giant green slime patch, is it?" That thing could eat Ponyville if it's green slime.
"The Crystal Ponies defeated a horrible monster there long ago," Luna said softly. "But that is just algae."
"What is algae?" Octavia asked hesitantly. "It looks dangerous."
"Isn't it some kind of swamp monster?" Vinyl asked hesitantly. "I'm pretty sure the Death of Alestair Pennydown talks about how it grew on the trees and corrupted them."
Cadence stared at us. "None of you know what algae is?" Her eyes were wide and her voice was full of shock.
"This is the first time I've been outside a city," Octavia suddenly confessed. "Other than train rides."
I knew that but it *still boggles me*. What kind of Earth Pony has never touched real dirt???
"Does it grow in Equestria? I thought it was one of those things our magic keeps out," Vinyl said hesitantly.
Luna... I looked at Luna and she looked like we didn't know what hooves were or that we had four legs. "So much has changed," she said softly.
"We're all city girls," Vinyl said. "I've never left Equestria before, and I've been to the countryside, but they didn't have this stuff either."
"Didn't you pay any attention in Biology?" Cadence finally said weakly.
Okay, now I feel like the biggest idiot in the universe. "I might have had other things on my mind," I mumbled. "I only paid attention in Sapient Biology." Any species that can talk has this thing on their throat called Noumena's Apple, allegedly from when he ate the Apple of Wisdom. In some species, like humans, it's bigger on men for some reason I no longer remember. It's one of the ways to identify sapient creatures!
Which is to say, your audience!
Spike yawned and sat up. "Did someone say something about dinner?"
"After we land," Cadence said. "You can nap more if you want."
"Did you know about algae, Spike?" Vinyl asked curiously.
"Yeah, Black Dragons let it grow around their lairs because they can actually eat it; a lot of dragons are mainly meat eaters, but Black Dragons can eat algae and some other things that grow in the stagnant water they prefer," Spike said, then looked over the side of the chariot. "Wow, that's a lot of algae."
Vinyl covered her face with her hooves. Octavia blinked in surprise, and I said, "Okay, Spike, you win."
"What did I win?" he asked excitedly.
"HUGS," Cadence said and hugged him, while he turned red. "You must stay small and cute forever."
"I need to grow up," Spike mumbled.
"If you try to never change, you end up like that lake," Luna said softly. "It is good and right that a child wish to grow." Cadence sighed.
"Growing up too fast isn't good either," Cadence said softly.
"I know, I know," Luna said, staring out across the landscape.
After that, we travelled in silence; as it started to get dark, Luna directed the charioteers to descend; we'd left the creepy lake behind, thankfully.
The air was cold and this place felt wrong and it felt *more* wrong as we descended. Vinyl and I both shuffled about and Octavia's eyes widened and she shied away from the edge of the chariot, trying to get into the center.
Bon-Bon finally came out, blinked and retreated back into the saddlebag. "What is going on?" she said anxiously.
Luna frowned, looking around. "Make for that," she said; scraggly trees grew on a hill with some grass; a spring bubbled up water near the peak and I felt a little less like the world was going to eat me as we approached.
"I am sorry, I have not been here in a thousand years," Luna said softly. "I did not realize it was this bad."
She dug in her saddlebags and extracted ebony and opal hoof-guards which she fitted onto our hooves; it made everything feel a little less terrible; she also turned Bon-Bon back to normal and we got out. "This isn't too bad but I can feel everything is twisted and wrong beyond this," she said softly.
"I know," Octavia said. "It shouldn't be like this. The Earth cries out." Her voice wobbled. "I've never felt anything like this."
"It shouldn't be this bad, I think," Luna said hesitantly. "Moon Bat, Cadence, ensure everyone is fed; I must contact Celestia."
Moon Bat was one of the Bat Pony Guards, the Night Guard; he and the other guardsmen set up a pavilion; well, we all helped and then they poured out bags of oats and rye for everyone; Spike ate another of his sealed sandwiches Twilight made him.
Octavia and Bon-Bon were still somewhat agitated and kept glancing at each other, not in a 'I hate you' way but more 'What the hell is this?' I ate quickly and cuddled up to Bon-Bon, which I think helped.
"Maybe we should retreat to the mountains instead of camping out here," Vinyl said, looking around after dinner. "This seems like the kind of place undead would like."
"Wraith-slug," Cadence and Spike said in unison in a creepy voice.
Octavia shivered. "Wraith... slug?" she said hesitantly.
"I'll save that for when we tell ghost stories," Cadence said cheerfully.
"I do not wish to tell ghost stories in a place like this," Octavia said, shivering.
"It'll be okay, Tavi," Vinyl said, patting her back with a hoof and Octavia moved closer to her.
Holy shit, are they...
My brain exploded.
Bon-Bon either didn't notice or didn't care.
I mean, Vinyl's cool to party with, but... And maybe we did make out at that one party before I got with Octavia... but she's...
I began wondering if all this ancient evil was making me hallucinate.
Why does she get to use a nickname when I never did????
******************
Spike's Saga:
I wandered around just a little; not going out of sight of everyone but I was curious why this hill is less tainted. Maybe there's a druid working here? "Hey, any druids around?" I shouted. "I have a friend who is a druid!"
I could feel the bass levels; for some reason, DJ Pon-3 had fired up her rig and was busy pumping deep bass into everything; it felt kind of strange and she kept changing it, sending it ever lower.
"Hello, druids?" I hope they like deep bass.
I heard Luna say loudly, "Cadence, this is not the time for ghost stories," so I ran back to see what she found out.
"You can't tell the wraith-slug story without me," I said urgently.
"I won't," she said, smiling that 'hehe' smile of hers.
"Celestia is worried; it wasn't this bad the last time she checked in on the area. But it was three years ago," Princess Luna said, glancing up at the stars; the moon was mostly full, only slightly declining. The visible moon, that is; there's an invisible one full of cat-people.
I don't remember any more why it's invisible, though.
"Before your return from your journeys, before the second Nightmare Moon attack," Vinyl said thoughtfully. "Are there any prophecies about the Crystal Empire?"
"They're lost too," Lyra said, laughing nervously. "Princess Luna, does every place's magic feel different? I don't remember them teaching us that at the School. But I didn't take any advanced arcane theory."
"Your majesty, I strongly recommend we evacuate this area. I don't like it," Moon Bat said, surprising us all; the Bat Ponies don't seem to talk much.
"Yes. I think we had better load up and go; I had not planned to bring any of you here when we left Canterlot." Princess Luna glanced at Cadence.
"I have been so busy with everything," she said softly, looking embarrassed. "Pack up," she said with her foalsitter voice. "Let's get out of here."
"We'll set a course southeast back into Glantrian territory; we should be able to make it to Dream Valley," Princess Luna said.
"Isn't it constantly being ravaged by monsters?" Vinyl asked.
"Not so much these days," Princess Luna said, though she frowned.
We began packing and she said to Lyra, "To finally answer your question, there is a distinct flavor but it is usually less... powerful or disgusting than this."
Octavia helped Vinyl get her rig back on the chariot; Vinyl set it up to play backwards, behind the chariot. I guess in case we're pursued.
Yeah, I am getting the definite feeling we've been suckered into something. I helped get everything loaded and then I suddenly coughed up a letter to Luna which turned out to be a map of the area. She passed that to her charioteers.
We got airborne and began heading what we hoped was southeast, towards Dream Valley. They say the local pegasi all have butterfly wings; I was curious to see if this was true.
Octavia was the first to hear it. "I hear hoofbeats," she said softly.
It was hard to tell if anything was on the ground; it was rather dark despite the moon and starlight and the ground was mostly gravel and dark colored dirt. Then I saw the shadows of Ponies... with no Ponies attached. I could hear the hoofbeats, but I couldn't *see* anyone. This was even creepier than the wraith-slug.
Then we started hearing wingbeats too, but you couldn't see any kind of flying Ponies, just shadows of them on the ground, trying to catch up to us.
The charioteers sped up, but so did our foes, assuming anyone is there and this isn't some kind of illusion. "This could be an illusion. Can Shadow Ponies even fly?" I asked.
"Shadow Ponies bargain service to the Entropics to gain special blessings; some gain the power of flight," Princess Luna said tensely.
"I know what to do," Lyra suddenly said, gently striking her forehead with a hoof. "Bon-Bon, you have some of your sparklers, right?"
"Those are dangerous for non-Earth Ponies to use; it's really easy to burn your mouth trying to spit them if you're not one of us," Bon-Bon said. "But... hmm, I bet Spike could use them safely too. You're immune to fire, right?"
"I can swim in lava!" I said proudly.
"Spike's even better than my idea," Lyra said. "He could spit them up and then we three bards will combine our power to augment the spark bursts into a giant light show. That should discourage the Shadow Ponies, right?"
The fact that Princess Luna is actually running away from these things worries me.
Bon-Bon dug out her sparkler candies; she sells them at festivals; you basically can spit up a firework! They're really cool but you have to be careful the sparks don't land on someone. Or your parents don't kill you. She tossed them to me.
"And I will boost Spikey," Cadence said confidently.
Octavia looked at Bon-Bon, who looked at her. They both nodded and Octavia said, "Fire on the Mountain?"
"Fire on the Mountain," Lyra said, her harp floating up by her head.
"Laying down bass line NOW," DJ Pon-3 said, beginning to vibrate her speakers.
"Spike, do you mind if I stand on your head?" Bon-Bon asked. ....
"I mean, I think I can turn into a phoenix and that will make more light, right?" she said hesitantly, looking at Princess Luna.
Princess Luna blinked, then smiled. "Yes. And I will strengthen the moon's light." She began a song.
Bon-Bon transformed and now perched on my head; it actually felt weirdly nice; she was so warm. Phoenix-Bon began to shine brighter; I could feel Cadence giving us power as I spat up the sparklers.
Each one exploded like a star going nova, shimmering with lights; you could see solid shadows behind and below us, shadow ponies, who now whinnied in fear and began to break off in all directions as I sent up 'rocket' after 'rocket' and Phoenix-Bon sang about burning down houses.
Where did Bon-Bon learn a song about burning houses???
Also, all that bass was making my body vibrate.
You could see the ground clearly now and the Shadow Ponies were gone; I guess we showed we weren't easy targets. "They don't... eat people... right?" I said weakly.
"We are fortunate; some of them are as brave as any of you," Princess Luna said. "If they had served Orcus or Alphaks or someone similar, we would have likely had to fight them."
We ended our light show, though now all the sparklers were gone. I hoped we wouldn't need them again.
Distantly, you could barely make out the mountains; hopefully we'd drop off the plateau and it would get warmer and we'd be beyond reach of our foes. Then the chanting started.
It was far away, in some strange tongue that made Cadence and Princess Luna squirm and the rest of us feel uncomfortable. Phoenix-Bon, still perched on my head, since she can't actually turn back without either more candy or a unicorn's help or it wearing off, made unhappy noises and tried to plug her ears with her wings.
"They're summoning a Shadow Dragon; they must have decided they are not strong enough to take us," Princess Luna said, frowning. "We're going to have to land because the first breath will likely destroy the chariot."
"We can't get off the plateau on foot," Lyra said, frowning. "It's a pretty sharp drop for hundreds of feet and only you can fly, Princess."
A dragon. Maybe I can talk... hey! "Hah! Spike is here to save the day!" I said proudly. "I know a trick to ward off dragons!" And I don't ward myself off any more with it either!
Princess Luna blinked. "You do?"
"Ooooh," Cadence said. "Did Twilight figure it out and teach you?"
"Prince Jaggar taught me," I said proudly. "Okay, here it goes."
I waved my arms and chanted and the field formed... about two feet around me.
That's not enough. "Maybe if Princess Luna shrinks everyone," I mumbled.
"We can all strengthen you with our power," Cadence said, now serious again. "Friendship is magic and we're all friends, right?"
Phoenix-Bon made a bird noise and looked at Octavia. Octavia shuffled on her hooves and looked at Bon-Bon.
"Come on, I'm the one who screwed things up," Lyra said desperately. "You shouldn't hate each other. You can hate me instead. And you like Spike, right?"
"She's so smug and thinks she's special because of her fancy clothing and her manners and her hair and hobnobbing with nobles all the time," Phoenix-Bon squawked, sounding aggravated. "She makes me wonder what you see in me." Then her eyes widened as she'd clearly said WAY more than she intended.
"I wear this bow-tie because my mother gave it to me," Octavia said angrily.
I could hear the chanting getting louder. "I think this is the *worst* possible time for a fight," I said, worried.
"And I seem to remembering seeing *you* all excited about hobnobbing with nobles and wearing fancy dresses and being *Lady* Bon-Bon when I'm just the hired help!," Octavia continued, getting angrier.
Princess Luna kept opening and shutting her mouth and struggling for words.
Diplomacy is really not her strong point.
"Octavia, you're a wonderful pony," Cadence said. "I may love tiaras a lot.... A whole lot..."
"Focus," I stage-whispered to her.
Cadence's eyes refocused. "I could never be as good a musician as you. Whatever the Glantrians may think, you are a Pony, and Ponies are noble creatures."
Made in a laboratory, I thought, but I kept my mouth shut.
"Bon-Bon, don't say that," Lyra said, sounding wounded. "I love you because you anchor me; I lift you to the skies and you keep me from floating off into space. Please don't hate Octavia; she's a wonderful pony, and I'm sure you could be good friends."
I've seen enough to know Lyra will probably spend the rest of her life regretting urging her fillyfriend to be friends with her ex. If it works.
"Come on, Tavi, you remember what we saw at the club that night," Vinyl said urgently to Octavia. "Also, if we all die because you two can't let go, we won't make the rent payments and we'll be evicted."
"You *live together*?" Lyra said, jaw dropping.
Princess Luna was starting to look ill and her eyes were unfocused and she was shivering and I could hear the chanting getting louder. "The clock to us all becoming dinner is ticking!" I said urgently. "I need all your help!"
"They'll probably wallpaper a house with your sheet music or something to get our missed payments," Vinyl continued.
Octavia's eyes turned into balls of flame, or so it seemed.
Lyra now ate a candy and turned into a phoenix as well (with a horn), then flew over to embrace Phoenix-Bon. "I love you, now and for always," she said softly. "Don't be afraid."
And then I heard a great cry of triumph. The charioteers were... burning wing... I guess... but we were not even going to make it to the edge of the plateau without my shield. "Come on, everyone!" I said desperately.
Phoenix-Bon closed her eyes and stroked Phoenix-Lyra with a wing. "A lady does not insult others to make herself feel better. I am sorry, Octavia. You are a magnificent musician and have the right to be proud of your skills. I am sorry."
Octavia said, "No one is burning my precious sheet music collection!" For a second, I thought she was going to burst into flame. She put out a hoof to touch my leg and Vinyl to touch my other one.
"You need to forgive her," Cadence told Octavia, though she now lit up her horn and lines of light began to connect us all.
"Hey, Luna, you okay?" I asked her, starting to worry.
"No," she said softly but she tied herself into the network. "I am proud of you, Spike. You will be a great dragon one day."
YEAH!
Octavia looked at Phoenix-Bon, then at Phoenix-Lyra, then at Vinyl. "My parents scrimped and saved to send me to Madame Silver Fountain's School For Young Fillies of Distinction. I graduated with honors and soon became part of the Royal Orchestra as I've always dreamed." Her voice was soft. "But no one sees me as a lady."
"I always did," Lyra mumbled.
"You're a lot more of a gentlewoman than I'll ever be," Vinyl said. "I'm sure Cadence can give you a tiara and make you a Baroness if you want, though. But you don't need a title to be a wonderful person. And if we die, we'll miss another rent payment."
I'm kind of surprised they struggle to pay the rent, given one is a popular DJ and the other is in the Royal Orchestra.
Luna said something incoherent about rent; she looks like Twilight the time Twilight accidentally invented a new kind of vomit.
Actually, let's forget that ever happened.
"I will never be a musician as good as you, no matter how much candy I eat," Phoenix-Bon said, holding out a wing.
"You are the most elegant of us here," Cadence said. "Sorry, Looney."
"Apology accepted," Luna said, making a gurgling noise.
"We have to do this before either Luna throws up or the DRAGON EATS US," I shouted.
I could hear it getting closer, circling and trying to decide on a line of attack.
Maybe Luna has motion sickness. It's really terrible but I stopped getting it after my last Dragonsleep.
"Okay," Octavia said. "I'm sorry I yelled at you, Lady Bon-Bon."
"Accepted, Lady Octavia," Phoenix-Bon said and Octavia smiled a little smile.
Candace wove everyone's power into me JUST as I heard the dragon closing in. I felt stronger than I had since the unfortunate hoarding incident... let's not think about that either.
I extended the sphere and it glowed like fire around us, protecting everyone. Oh yeah, SPIKE THE MIGHTY DRAGON IS HERE! Four lights sparkled on the eastern horizon, above the green vale of Dream Valley, which sits in... well, a valley... which connects Glantri to the Adri Varma Plateau.
You could see the Shadow Dragon and hear it howl as it bounced off and had to retreat and come around. I blocked it three times and now we were over the edge of the plateau and beginning to descend.
Then it SAT ON MY FIELD. Bastard!
We began losing height rapidly; this thing was hard to see, being made of black shadows, but it was huge, bigger than my aunt and uncle. Luna was still gibbering and moaning, though she added power to my shield and the three bards were singing some song together and playing as they shared power with me.
The distant lights got closer even as we sank quickly towards the ground. They were Ponies! In fact, it was Rainbow Crash, followed by Cruisin', Fire Swallow, and Dragonfly!
Man, being rescued by the Elements of Power is VERY embarrassing.
But how did they even know to find us?
I was sweating like a pig; even with everyone helping me, this was way too much. It was hard to think about anything but keeping the sphere up. And the dragon jumping up and down on it.
"You can do it, Spikey," Cadence said warmly, and I concentrated harder, though I felt like I would die.
The Shadow Dragon hammered at my field with his head, but it bounced off; before it could try and breathe on us, lightning spiked down from the sky, striking it in the head and it fell off the sphere; though it recovered, now it made for the four onrushing ponies, who split in four directions.
Luna finally rose to her feet and shook like a dog shaking off water. And I chose this moment to faint from exhaustion.
***************
Bon-Bon's Burning:
I tried to get one of my candies but set my saddlebags, lying on the floor of the chariot, on fire. Cadence stamped it out and dug out the candy I had been making on the way here for me and threw one each to Lyra and I. Then we took off, still in Phoenix form, after the dragon as it turned to chase Dragonshy, who was laughing in a very disturbing way.
I could see the other three starting to peel around, Fire Swallow coming down from above and Cruisin' and Rainbow Crash rising up from below. Lyra and I arched around the right side of him; our goal was to get near his face. I continued frantically chewing the bubblegum.
The shadow dragon grew closer and closer to Dragonshy and we tried to get closer to it, but it was so fast and we weren't half as big as it was.
"Fool! Face the wrath of mother nature!" Dragonshy shouted and began to shapeshift into another dragon...
Except something went wrong and she ended up as a huge lizard the size of a pony, maybe even a full sized horse... but with no wings. She immediately began to plummet. "Dammit, that girl makes it look so easy!!!!!!"
Ironically, the Shadow Dragon missed biting her as she plunged right out of the range of his teeth. Or hers. I have no idea how to tell dragon gender.
Lyra and I plunged downwards to try and save her from splatting.
And then Fire Swallow spat flame into the face of the Shadow Dragon, temporarily blinding it; as it fumbled around, I could now see that Rainbow Crash and Cruisin' were carrying a long chain in their mouths and they now began flying intricately around the dragon's wings, tangling them up and sending it flying around erratically as it struggled to remain skyborne. They dodged nimbly between beating wings and the thrashing tail with a grace I know I couldn't match. They're so nimble!
Then I saw Luna point one hoof and shout "PETTY MORTAL, BOW BEFORE THE PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT!"; Vinyl's speakers amplified this humongously and the dragon shook like an earthquake had hit him. Cello notes thundered like meteors striking the earth and I could see Cadence glowing brightly, her light shining onto Luna, Vinyl, and Octavia.
We plunged down towards Dragonshy, who now turned into a small brown dog and coughed up bees. ...
She shifted again, becoming a large cow, and then into a small fluffy blue cat. At that point, we reached her and each spat bubblegum onto her legs and caught her, carefully biting the bubblegum so we didn't end up cutting her leg with our sharp beaks; I had *planned* to spit it in the Dragon's eyes.
Only now did it sink in that I had just been planning to CHARGE A DRAGON and spit in its eyes. ...
Shifting really does affect your mind if you're not careful.
We hauled her around to the chariot and she turned back to normal, still with bubblegum on two legs. She also looked slightly charred for some reason, the tips of her coat hairs all blackened.
Then I remembered I am *on fire*.
There were stars in the east, coming our way, hundreds of them. The dragon thrashed and now began to plummet, too tangled up to fly and Rainbow Crash and Cruisin' flew upwards and slapped hooves in triumph. The lights grew closer, hundreds of butterfly-winged ponies, all of them wearing softly glowing armor, led by... Fluttershy? No, this pony, though it had the same coat and mane as Fluttershy, was a touch larger than Fluttershy and also wore a crown and had butterfly wings with pink roses and green rose petals and rosebuds on a white background. She wore a crown of red gold set with pink gems and wore a necklace with two golden rings on it.
"HELLO, COUNTESS ROSEDUST," Princess Luna said through the speakers; Flutterponies went tumbling in the wave of sound. The Duchess weathered the storm unbowed, however. Vinyl frantically worked the equipment. "My apologies," she said, still amplified. "We request permission to enter the Fluttermarch of Dream Valley."
Several other ponies whispered to Countess Rosedust; one of them was a regular Pegasus, blue with a pink mane and her cutie mark was two blue whistles and one pink. "Permission is granted," Countess Rosedust said regally, as loud as Princess Luna without needing an amplifier.
The dragon hit the ground and dissolved. It just broke into shadowy clouds of smoke which dispersed in the wind; soon it was as if it had never existed.
"Are these yours?" Countess Rosedust asked, pointing at Crash and Cruisin'. "They invaded our airspace without asking permission and we were coming to deal with them and then I got a report of a dragon coming this way."
Cruisin' seemed to only now actually notice Countess Rosedust and his eyes lit up.
What a jerk he is.
"I serve Mother Nature, who MADE the air!" Dragonfly said angrily, waving her staff with her tail.
"Princess Celestia asked Princess Marjorie to send us to help you and no one said anything about 'airspace'," Rainbow Crash said frantically.
They got all the way from the Broken Lands this fast? Wow.
I can 't fly that fast.
I'm flying! I suddenly was reminded I was flying. I can see why Pegasi love this.
Cadence whispered frantically to Dragonfly.
Cruisin' flew down to Countess Rosedust and bowed. "Wise and beautiful Countess Rosedust, please forgive us for our intrusion; we were so frantic to prevent Princess Luna being devoured by a fearsome Shadow Dragon that we could think of nothing else, not even you and your lovely lady warriors."
Fire Swallow had a hoof over her mouth, to suppress laughter, I think; she was making her way back to the chariot.
"I'm sure that works on all the ladies back home, but you will find us more clear eyed here," Countess Rosedust said firmly and Crusin' looked stunned. "That being said, I see the urgency of your mission. This will be the fourth time I have seen that dragon 'die'."
Princess Luna frowned. "When did it first appear?"
"After the eclipse at the Summer Solstice in 1000 AC," Countess Rosedust said. "Ever since then, the Adri Varna Plateau has increasingly been a place of shadow and darkness. Princess Emerald has sent some of her Pegasi Guard to assist us in patrolling the border." She nodded to her Pegasus advisor and I could now see some Pegasi in groups among the Flutterponies.
Princess Luna frowned and I wondered how the news of this hadn't gotten around... though I guess even before this, no one wise went to the Adri Varna Plateau; it's kind of hostile.
"But now it looks even worse; the darkness grows," Countess Rosedust continued. "But our homeland is too fractious and self-absorbed to do anything about it." She sounded quite frustrated. "Half the Princes and Princesses spend their time plotting against each other and the other half want to conquer one of our neighbors for no reason at all."
"All three of our neighbors raid us regularly, that would constitute a valid reason for wishing to bring a cessation of such activities," the Pegasus next to Countess Rosedust said firmly. "Though a study of the financial cost of conquest would require a very long term period of control in order for it to not cost more than simply accepting the raids as a cost of business, so to speak. And of course, it is hard to predict the cost of actual occupation and rule in the face of local resistance." Countess Rosedust simply looked at her. "It's also not very nice."
"Enemies are for killing," Dragonshy said; she sounds like Fluttershy, so having her say that is kind of creepy.
Lyra and I continued to circle the chariot because now I was worried about setting it on fire. I hope I can keep this up. "Doesn't Glantri also border Darokin? They're not raiding you, are they?"
"Darokin does technically border us," the Pegasus said. "However, the Silver Sierras block trade, and in practice, our real neighbors are Wendar, which is full of wild, unstable fey, the Broken Lands, full of insane maniac monsters, and the Ethengars, who believe theft is both holy and obligatory."
"That's a bit of an oversimplification of the Ethengars," Lyra said, flying over and now arguing about Ethengarian culture with the Pegasus, who still hasn't introduced herself!
Luna whispered to Dragonshy, who looked aggravated and now began trying to groom herself with Cadence's help.
Countess Rosedust now came over to talk to Luna privately and we all made for the aeries of the Flutterponies.
****************
Lyra's Lyric:
Her name is Wind Whistler and she's really smart, but kind of stubborn. I can tell I've studied more Humanics than her, but she's a great arguer, so we had a good time discussing Glantri's situation, while everyone else stretched out in the aerie. Basically, Dream Valley is the region between the Kurish Massif mountains in the south and east and the Adri Varna Plateau to the north and west of it; the Flutterponies patrol the border, but their homes are carved in to the mountainsides on the southern and eastern border. So we were in a town carved in a series of tiers into the side of a mountain.
It was *very cool*. I've always wanted to see one but the Flutterponies are pretty picky about visitors.
"I've never seen a Phoenix with a Unicorn horn before," Wind Whistler said solemnly. "Are there different kind of phoenixes? Or are you a transformed Flame Unicorn?"
The candy, as if on cue, now wore off and I turned into my normal self. "I am a Unicorn," I told her and bowed. "Transformed by my fair lady love, Lady Bon-Bon. I am Lady Lyra, her consort."
"An Earth Pony Arcaner?" she said, amazed, and studying Bon-Bon, who was busy talking to Cadence about something, while Cadence held the snoozing Spike.
I smiled broadly. "No one will look down on my lady love."
Princess Luna and Countess Rosedust had gone to a private chamber; we were in a reception room, having food and drink and talking to lots of other ponies; none of us had ever met a Flutterpony, so other than Dragonshy, who had gone off for a bath, we were all talking to our hosts.
I'm kind of worried about what happened to Luna; she was a mess, but she's divine and I wish I knew what happened. What could do that to her?
Maybe she just has keener senses for entropy?
I now asked Wind Whistler about the hill we'd landed on.
"Some spots resist the shadow and we don't know why," Wind Whistler said. "We think they must have been especially strong in the power of Law before the fall of the Crystal Empire."
This bothers me; why hadn't I heard of this before? I guess I just never hear much about stuff up here because it's all wilderness, but still...
"We hadn't heard of it," I said, frowning.
"Well, you don't border it and even most Glantrians and Sindhi aren't anywhere near it," Wind Whistler said. "And it is strangely uncomfortable to discuss." She shuffled a bit on her hooves. "Sometimes I almost forget the problem until I am on patrol again."
Or maybe something is *making* people not notice or think about it.
I got as much information about this as I could from Wind Whistler and began racking my brain, trying to solve the problem. And trying to reduce Wind Whistler-ese to simpler terms. She reminds me of Twilight. Who probably would already know the problem and be solving it.
But I have a hard time with any kind of knowledge that isn't music or behavior or stories. Which is why I majored in music and minored in cultural studies and acting.
"Hmm, Equestria, Rockhome, Alfheim... you know, until Thyatis got its independence, there were no real human states of significance around the time that the Crystal Empire vanished," I said hesitantly. "Oh, and the Five Shires. But Darokin, Glantri, Sindh, Karameikos, Ylarum, the Northern Reaches... they were all just big messes with petty states and so on."
"Or Alphatian colonies," Wind Whistler pointed out. "But of course, Alphatia was a mighty human nation, though I guess it did have a little of everything."
"A lot of Elves, especially," I pointed out. "Something strange has to be going on here. I guess we're just grasping at straws right now, though."
Then it hit me. "Maybe the Shadow Dragon isn't real at all. Maybe they're making a giant shadow monster of one. And that's why they were all chanting and why it went poof."
"That has been my theory," Wind Whistler said. "I don't know much about arcane magic works, but I know there are ways to cooperate, and friendship is magic."
Evil friendship. Do Shadow Ponies even have friends? How can you be evil and care about people?
Princess Luna now came out with the Countess. "We will stay here the rest of tonight; you receive a rare honor in this. Spike, I need to talk to you about sending some messages."
"Of course!" he said. He'd revived from earlier by now.
The bed was nice and soft, and even with Bon-Bon mumbling recipes in her sleep, I soon fell asleep, more exhausted than I had realized.
*********************
Spike's Saga:
I felt all weird when I woke up, kind of wobbly and hollow. I ate like a pig, then got bloated from eating too much. I hate my stomach sometimes.
People had meetings and consulted libraries and things, I think, while I laid around moaning in the reception room and coughing up gas. Cadence was kind enough to stay with me and soothe my suffering. She's a real sweetie. I'd think she had a thing for me but I thought that... I hoped Rarity liked me and... now I don't trust my judgment. It's probably just foalsitter instincts, because she still thinks I'm a little kid.
"Have you ever had your heart broken?" I asked her, then wished I hadn't said that.
"Oh yes, the second colt I ever fell in love with was in love with someone else," she said mournfully. "I thought I'd be alone forever."
"Wait, what happened to the first one?" I asked.
"His family moved and I never saw him again; I moped around magic kindergarden for days," she said, sighing wistfully. ...
"I mean, when you were old enough to not just have a little kid crush," I said weakly.
"That never stops," she said softly. "You just get better at recognizing and shutting it down if it's a bad idea. But it's a difference of degree, not kind." A little louder, she said, "I am sorry for you, Spike. Rarity is a wonderful mare. But she was both too young and too old for you."
"Too... young...?" I said in confusion.
"A pony's life is measured in decades and a dragon's in centuries or more, even now. For the moment, you are too young for her, but the time would come when you were just barely being considered an adult by other dragons and Rarity would be ready for burial," she said softly, her eyes unfocused and a little wet.
My stomach churned at that. "Yes, but I'd have to be alone forever if I worried about that. It's better to have those decades than nothing. Twilight agrees with me." Or she wouldn't be seeing West Wind; I like him. I dunno if it'll come to anything if he's always gone and so is she, though.
She studied me with an odd look on her face. If she's about to confess to me... I have *no* idea what to do.
But I'm probably being vain.
"So tell me about Big Macintosh," she said slowly.
Why is she... does she... oh wait, she's likely thinking in terms of him dropping dead while Celestia has to go on. One of Cadence's cutie mark tricks is that she's really good at telling how people feel about someone else. Her big one is that she can literally turn friendship and other kinds of love into magic; this lets her amplify people's powers when they work together. It's a big part of how everyone pooled their power to me to save everyone.
Hey, *I* got to save everyone!
That made me smile. "He's a hard working, kind of quiet farmpony; he loves his family very much but he's not the type to talk about it... or anything else... too much," I told her. "But he's very, very honest. And..." I tried to think how to say it. "He's farm-educated."
Her eyebrows moved oddly and her face crunched. "I don't understand what you mean."
"It's like... he couldn't tell you who Hanno was or what the plot of Fifth Night was, but he knows twenty kinds of soil and what they're good for and he can read the weather and tell how something will grow when he plants it. Not just because he's an Earth Pony but because he is part of his family's lore and their ongoing experiments to be the best farmers," I told her. "I dunno, him and Celestia seems like personality wise, it's fine, but it's like they're from different planets socially and in how they live. She can't be a farm girl and he's no prince. Not in the 'evil nasty' way but he's totally... I mean, I guess Celestia at least has touched dirt..." What kind of Earth Pony has never been in the countryside??? I know more about the countryside than Octavia does. That's just so wrong.
Cadence sighed, then said, "So what about these 'Cutie Mark Crusaders'? Twilight mentions them in her letters, but I haven't met them."
"They're the Immortality Mark Crusaders now," I said, laughing softly. "Thinking about them because of the whole Big Mac thing?"
"Among other reasons," she said, oddly with her naughty voice, which worried me because when Cadence thinks she is being wicked, I somehow end up covered in honey and chased by angry bees.
She apologized, but not something I want to do again.
"Scootaloo basically is Rainbow Dash at a younger age," I said. "I think Ivan is training her and so is Dash. *Now*." Everyone had basically chewed on her head to get her to do it.
"Sweetie Belle is kind of like you, if you were a dimwit," I continued.
She frowned at me. "Spike, that's very mean."
"She's kind and gentle but all she knows is card tricks that bastard Marcus taught her." I could feel my voice heating up. "Which she then uses to manipulate people. Like him." My hands were clenching and unclenching.
"Spikey, it's not healthy to hate people," Cadence said gently. "You're just saying that because she likes Marcus and you hate him because Rarity loves him."
"And what he did to Twilight! Who forgave him!" I shouted. People stared, but I didn't care. I felt this knot in my chest; it hurt, but I couldn't stop.
"Twilight has a good heart," Cadence said. Cadence is too trusting and kind; she'd say that to a monster eating her leg. "But... oh wait, he was Erik."
"Yes, he lied to you too!" I said, pointing at her.
People were whispering but I didn't care. The more people who know, the faster his past catches up with him.
"Spikey, that's a state secret," she said very softly. She sighed. "You need to let go, because hate gives darkness a hold into you. And that can destroy you."
Dragons are good at hating. As Marjorie demonstrated.
Not the example I want.
"I can never forgive him," I said stubbornly.
"So tell me about the rest of the Crusaders," she said sadly.
"Apple Bloom's like a mechanical genius. She's fairly practical and probably the smartest of the group. She built a giant flying warship treehouse! And a really cool blimp. Twist is probably going to be like Bon-Bon with glasses in the future. She has really nice hair. And Dinky... is kind of weird," I concluded.
"Weird?" Cadence asked curiously.
"She's full of conspiracy theories and probably thinks you're controlled by evil tiaras from the future, but she's a pretty good wizard for her age. A lot better than Sweetie." Admittedly, a lot of kids in magic Kindergarden aren't big suckers like Sweetie.
"I'm controlled by evil tiaras from the *past*," Cadence said, laughing, and I now noticed she'd changed headgear since yesterday. She probably likes Marcus because they both want to put things on their head.
Okay, I love my hat but not like Marcus loves hats.
Cadence continued catching up on things with me as gradually my body adjusted, and finally, I felt like I was really functional. I get the impression she's digging for something, but I don't know what.
But talking to her is fun, so it's okay.
*****************
Bon-Bon's Flying Lesson:
"Thank you for coming to our aid," I told Rainbow Crash; we'd gone outside to look at Dream Valley; you could see a lot of it from here, endless plains and forests and hills, nestled between the distant plateau, a dark horizon smear from here, and the mountains we were in. "I see Cruisin' still needs a beating, though."
Crash sighed. "It's weird. Attacking the dragon, we were in such perfect synch with each other."
"It was amazing," I told her. Because it was. "You really are an incredible precision flyer."
"Dash is faster than me, but I'm more nimble," she said, perking up a little. "You were the phoenix, right?"
"Yeah," I told her. "It's kind of incredible, being a phoenix. Being able to fly," I said softly.
"Yeah, that's why Pegasi are the best ponies," she said with an amount of pride that reminded me she is a clone of Rainbow Dash after all. "If you turn into one, we could go flying together, right?"
"Yeah," I said, so I got one and we took to the air, flying around the mountain and exploring. The one thing that worries me is that these things don't have a warning they're going to wear off. I need to get some kind of magic timer that will change with me; my cooking timers would be hard for some forms to carry.
A half-dozen pegasi and flutterponies soon joined us, flying merrily around the mountain. There really is something magical in flight. One of the flutterponies asked me, "Are you a doppleganger?"
I laughed. "No, I use magical candy to transform myself."
She looked greatly relieved and glanced off towards the distant plateau; you could see it raining heavily there now and tiny distant streaks of lightning. The thunder was hardly any louder than if you dropped a spoon on the floor.
"Are we likely to get hit by the storm?" I asked.
"There's a pretty good chance we'll get overrun by the storm around sunset," Rainbow Crash said. "I assume the weather patrol will deal with it."
"The what?" one of the flutterponies asked.
"You know, the people who control the weather," Rainbow Crash said very hesitantly.
"We lost our weather control powers when we became Flutterponies, but gained power over light," the flutterpony said, now dancing in a circle and creating a rainbow as she danced; butterflies flew around her and birds took flight, then all dissolved as she stopped. "I think the Pegasi Corps can do stuff like that." She had a colorwheel as her cutie mark.
One of the pegasi with us said, "We don't have enough ponypower to cover all of Dream Valley, though. It takes a huge number of us to control really big weather patterns." She studied the storm. "I don't know if every Pegasus in Dream Valley combined could stop that." He was blue with a black mane and his cutie mark was a golden eagle.
Rainbow Crash said, "Isn't this like super-magic-kingdom place?"
"I've heard that our powers are much stronger here," the flutterpony said thoughtfully. "Because we tap the magic of Glantri but the Pegasi are not adapted to the magic of Glantri."
"Hey, we're an important part of this land too, Light Show!" the Pegasus said angrily.
"Nothing personal, Keen Eye," Light Show said, waving her hooves and looking apologetic. "That's just what we learned in school."
Rainbow Crash frowned, then said, "What exactly is the magic of Glantri?"
"Secret knowledge, hidden lore, the joy of discovery of new things," Light Show said. "It's why there are so many secret societies and the people who join them become more powerful."
Like the one I joined, I realized. I need to finish reading the books they gave me.
"Are you in a secret society?" Rainbow Crash asked Light Show. "And why wouldn't that work for pegasi?"
"It wouldn't be a *secret* if I told you," Light Show said cheerfully, circling us all with a trail of stars.
This must have to do with the weird magic I felt in the ground in the palace and here too. Does each country have its own magic? We didn't get much into magical theory in school and I wouldn't have paid attention, not being a Unicorn.
"But why not Pegasi?" Rainbow Crash said, flapping her wings and looking thoughtful.
Eagle Eyes mumbled something incoherent.
"Pegasi aren't much into books, studying, lore, and all that," Light Show said. "They want *action*."
"In Equestria, the power of friendship drives our magic," I said.
Everyone looked at me like I was a small child and I frowned. "It does!"
It suddenly struck me that the Flutterponies, with their light powers, are the ideal people to fend off the shadowy entropy stuff of the Adri Varna. Which is no doubt why they have the job.
Rainbow Crash mumbled something about skill and hard work.
"What was that?" I asked her. At least she didn't mock me with her eyes.
"I am the Element of Excellence, and my power comes from my hard work and my building my skills by practice, practice, practice," Rainbow Crash said louder.
The other ponies nodded approvingly; I felt good for Crash but more annoyed they had looked at me so skeptically.
"You were really incredible," Eagle Eyes said, coming a little closer to Crash as we flew around. "And you're so fast too."
"Yeah, we don't have the raw speed of a Pegasus," Light Show confessed. "Our wings aren't sturdy enough to sustain that high a speed."
I wonder how fast I could go.
We ended up having a race; I was ahead of the flutterponies, but while I kept up with the pegasi at first, around the time I hit the best speed I could do, they all suddenly fired off like rockets at high speed with Crash as much ahead of them as they were ahead of me. I was amazed by it.
Eagle Eyes circled back to me. "I guess you don't know how to slipstream because you've never been a Pegasus before," he said hesitantly. "You were keeping up until we hit the slip barrier."
"I can't use the magics of my form, just the physical." I told him. "I'm probably stronger than you like this but I can't do Pegasus magic like that."
"I guess you couldn't do dragon breath as a dragon, then," he said thoughtfully.
"Yes. Though I have a few candy that could fake it once or twice."
Rainbow Crash now studied me in an odd way, circling me slowly. "Eagle Eyes, Rock Lobster, come here."
Rock Lobster was a male Pegasus with a pink coat and a red mane and a cutie mark of a lobster playing a guitar. I have no idea what his cutie mark *does*.
They hurriedly whispered, then they flew into a triangle formation around me. "Bon-Bon, I'm going to need you to fly as fast as you can," Rainbow Crash said very seriously. "Put all your Earth Pony strength into it."
I licked my lips nervously. "Okay."
Then we began zooming forward, faster, faster, faster; I could feel air pile up in front of me; this has to be the slip barrier. But now they began to spin like turbines; I felt the air churn and wash across me and suddenly, the barrier was gone; I could see rainbow streaks of light glowing along the edge of the triangle and inside it, the air was clear and easy to move through and we blazed over Dream Valley at incredible speed, passing over a huge fortress/palace, which I assume is where the Princess lives and heading onwards towards another fortress, which guards the mountain pass that lets you enter the rest of Glantri from Dream Valley.
It was maybe the most incredible thing I've ever done in my life and I suddenly understood why Pegasi love being Pegasi. This sense of freedom is so incredible.
The fortress, oddly, was staffed with people who looked rather Thyatian. Why would Thyatians be working in a fortress in Glantri?
Whatever the reason, they panicked as we circled the fortress and turned around to go back, but by the time they go do anything, we were long gone.
To our surprise, Countess Rosedust and Princess Luna were out on the edge of the aerie, watching us, as we returned. I hoped we were not in trouble.
We coasted to a halt in front of them and Rainbow Crash said, "Hey, ladies," nervously.
"I just got a complaint about you from the Castellan of Fortress Ylourgne," Countess Rosedust said sternly. "Eagle Eyes, Rock Lobster, harassing the Caurenzians is strictly forbidden!"
"Yeah, but we figured out a new trick!" Rock Lobster said proudly. "I bet we could move a bunch of Flutterponies quickly with it."
"It was my idea," Rainbow Crash said, moving up close to her. "The rest of them were just helping me out. I figured out how to make a joint slipstream so flyers who can't make one could fly along with us."
"That could be useful," Countess Rosedust said thoughtfully. "But avoid the fortress. I do not need more trouble with the Caurenzians."
"Yes, Countess," Rock Lobster said and saluted.
But she soon had her people executing this move on various scales while I went to rest and Rainbow Crash talked to Princess Luna.
************************
Lyra's Lyric:
Caurenzians? Fortress Ylourgne is right next to New Averoigne on the other side of the pass; Caurenze is over 100 miles away! I felt quite confused by why it would be full of them; the Caurenzians are exiles from Thyatis who fled here after losing out in a civil war. They're not very nice people at all, prone to things like poisoning you for looking at them funny.
Man, I missed out on something really cool; I was just hanging out and talking to people. Which was fun, but it wasn't 'let's invent something new!'
"So what's the plan?" I asked Luna eagerly.
"We will return to Equestria," she said. "Strange things are afoot and I must go where I cannot take you."
To Pandius, where the Immortals have a hidden city on the moon! I would give my left foreleg to see that!
"I do have work calling but we can stay if you need us," Bon-Bon said.
"I have asked enough of you, my little ponies," Princess Luna said, sounding a little sad. "I may need to call upon you again, but for now, you need to rest and recover." She shivered, glancing off towards the plateau, though we were all inside in her guest room.
"And I should report on this to Princess Marjorie," Rainbow Crash said.
Dragonfly was now whispering to Bon-Bon about something and they talked quietly.
Damn, I was ready for more adventure, creepy as that place is.
Spike, who was riding on Cadence, said, "Should I tell Twilight to expect you, Princess?"
"Yes," Princess Luna said.
Spike wrote a quick note and burned it.
Well, I do need to try and get some decent songs written; it's less than a month to the Running of the Leaves, after all.
*******************
Spike's Saga:
Right when Princess Luna, Cadence and I walked into the library in Ponyville, I suddenly realized we had left Twilight's balloon in GLANTRI.
"The BALLOON!"
"I have it," Luna said, magicking a tiny balloon out of her bags. "Twilight can just dispel this when she needs to use it again."
"Hi! Twilight's having a conniption fit and Rarity's trying to help her shop while I library it up," Dinky said cheerfully. She was wearing a professor mortarboard hat for some reason. "Watch this!" She made a cloud of bubbles, stepped onto it and rode it up to the high shelves. "Now I can get any book down!" she said proudly.
I sighed. "Twilight doesn't even know where half the stores in town are, since I do the shopping more than her."
"I've been trying to help her but I kind of got buried under the paper order," Dinky said, landing her cloud, which I could see Cadence was studying. "It was so heavy," she mumbled.
"Twilight needs at least one ream of paper every three days," I told Dinky. "Or she starts writing on anything flat. And that's if she's only doing light writing."
I woke up with notes on the soles of my feet one time, though she was admittedly drunk.
"She ordered one hundred reams," Dinky mumbled.
OWW. "What bond strength?"
"Bond what?" Dinky asked.
"Reams come in a bond strength which is their weight," I said patiently. Don't they teach kids anything in school? "Thicker, tougher paper has a higher bond rating."
"It was all... papery," she said vaguely, waving a hoof about.
Probably 24-bond; that's Twilight's usual. 20-bond sometimes gets rent if she writes furiously.
"Cadence, you should go find Twilight and help her. Spike, we need to talk in your room," Luna said to me.
I'm not sure how Cadence is going to find her here when she's only visited once and that was months ago... Well, Luna knows what she's doing.
We went up to the bedroom; Twilight and I sleep in the same room, different beds. I will need a bigger one soon, after my next dragonsleep.
I sat on my bed, Luna laid out on the floor, stretching, then sat up. "Spike, I understand how you feel about Marcus and Rarity, but you need to let go of that or it will destroy you. I know all about hating someone so much that it consumes you," she said softly, studying the wall and her voice toned very low and soft without its usual power.
I squirmed uncomfortably. I know... sort of... about how she became Nightmare Moon but this is totally different because Marcus is a horrible serial seducer and abandoner! Whereas Celestia was just... you know, I'm not sure how anyone could get that mad at Celestia.
"He's a terrible person who is going to hurt Rarity," I said angrily, squirming on my bed.
"That's for Rarity to deal with, not you; you can't live other people's lives for them," Luna said firmly to me. "And when you hold onto anger, you let entropy have a hold on you." She shivered. "I'm going to tell you a story that hardly anyone knows, because I want you to understand, Spike."
My eyes widened. "I... I don't know if that's wise, I have a big mouth sometimes."
"I trust you to keep a secret," she said, and then she started.
***************
Luna's Secret:
In the sixth and fifth century BC, Orcs and other monsters ruled a huge swathe of land from here all the way to Karameikos and they only narrowly failed to conquer Karameikos. Celestia and I came to what is now Equestria to liberate it and we found the Elements of Harmony with the help of the Crystal Ponies, who had founded their empire with the help of the Elements. Celestia and I were not Immortals yet, but we were... not normal either. Our kingdom flourished and we achieved Immortality but the original element bearers died; every so often, a new group would be chosen by the elements. We remained strongly allied to the Crystal Ponies, though the distances and dangers of travel kept contact low for most Ponies.
Celestia and I developed a system where she ran the public side of government and I controlled the 'Night Court' which handled things out of the sight of the public, from bureaucratic work to espionage. I am no diplomat, unfortunately, but I am cunning in ways Celestia still is not, for all she tries.
But I began to resent that she received all the love and affection of the public and I did not, for no one saw what I did. Further, at times, I had to do terrible things to protect Equestria. Or so I told myself at the time.
I became bitter and frustrated; Celestia could keep her hooves clean and I could not. She was loved and I scared people.
That's how Mother was able to get me to join Entropy. She loved me, though Mother's love can be more dangerous than her hate. She always comforted me when I was frustrated and angry and eventually, I succumbed. I wanted to be loved, needed it, and she offered me that.
She played me like a violin.
And she did it because I held on to hate. I nurtured it and watered it. I associated only with people like Sombra, who fed my anger. He was frustrated with his Queen for the same reasons I was with Celestia. Counterpoint was kind and gentle and beloved, in part because people like him took care of the dirty work in the shadows.
We spent a lot of time being resentful together. He was no immortal, but he understood me and I understood him.
Or so I told myself.
We planned a double coup. His people would reinforce mine and then once Celestia was down and we'd seized all the Elements of Harmony, we'd seize the Crystal Empire too and unite them.
Mother told me that I had to be careful, that if I went beyond mortal power, the Council of Intrusion would come down on me like a bug. But I was overconfident; Sombra had allied himself to Thanatos as I had to Mother and we thought that Thanatos would keep the council off us. If only as revenge for what happened to his followers in Nithia.
I was wrong and I spent a thousand years sleeping in prison on the Moon as a result. Thanatos and Sombra betrayed me. Hule was invaded at the same time by Boreans and Mother was busy trying to save her people there when I was defeated by Celestia and the Elements and then tried and imprisoned.
I spent 1000 years sleeping and plotting revenge and Celestia spent 1000 years feeling guilty and trying to find a way to bring me back. And she did. She could have, should have hated me for what I did, betraying everything we worked for and turning on her, but she loved me.
But we can't count on people loving us that much to save us from ourselves. I know Twilight would never give up on you Spike, but I don't want you to end up like I did.
****************
Spike's Saga The Return:
"What happened to Sombra?" I asked softly.
"I don't know, for sure," Luna told me. "Something went wrong, the Silver Palace vanished and then somehow, the Crystal Empire vanished. Uncle doesn't know what happened to it; it wasn't any direct act of the Immortals as a whole, though someone must know." She frowned. "And now this business with spreading entropy and people often forgetting about it... Something is wrong and I have to find out."
"You got really sick," I told her.
Luna grimaced. "I know. Which means I can't go in there myself as I should. But I will figure out something." She rose. "The best thing for you is to move on. There are plenty of people your age who I am sure would find you a wonderful companion. Let go of your hate, before it devours you."
I flopped onto my back, legs in the air. "It's not so easy."
"I know," she said softly. "All my words are just words; Even Mother told me I needed to calm down in the end." She sighed.
"Hey, Luna, you here?" Ivan shouted distantly.
"I'll be down in a minute," she shouted back, then smiled a sad smile.
"So... you and Ivan..." I said hesitantly.
"Fire is pretty, but when you've burned yourself on it, you get wary. Yet the beauty remains," she said softly. "I don't know. We shall see."
That sounds like that stupid Ochelean book Twilight made me read. 'The grass is green and the skies blue, yet water cannot fly and you cannot spend the grass.' If that guy wasn't stoned 24-7 on opium, I'll eat my hat.
Then she headed downstairs, while I laid on my bed, lost in thought.
******************
Lyra's Lyric:
"Another year turns / another cake burns / the leaves fall down / all over town," Pinkie sang.
This was not great, but it STILL was better than anything I had thought of.
We were up in her room over Sugar Cube Corner. Then Pound Cake began chewing on Pinkie's leg. I think he's teething and he keeps mistaking Pinkie for food. She laughed, then pried him off; he's a Pegasus, even though the Cakes are Earth Ponies. Their daughter, his twin, is a Unicorn! Magical genetics are messy. "Hey, eat this," Pinkie said, shoving a cookie in his mouth and massaging her leg back into shape.
"You're so patient. I think I'd go mad with kids," I confessed.
"You'll be a fine father," Pinkie said, smiling.
"I'm a *mare*," I told her. A little androgynous but Bon-Bon likes that.
Pinkie just smiled at me and now Pound Cake tried to crawl into her saddlebags. I pulled him out gently with magic. "So did you enjoy your adventure?"
"I had a great time, but now I have to work," I said, then flopped out on the floor, legs in the air.
"I know, I know," she said, gently patting Pound Cake and tucking him between a leg and her body. "But you have a cute fillyfriend to share it with."
"I'm surprised you don't have a coltfriend," I told her.
"Oh, there was this soldier, but he couldn't stay around..." She sighed. "I'm good at friendship but I never... my family was all 'no touching anyone until marriage or even looking, really', and I kind of never learned how to deal with stallions. I either hint and they don't notice or I come on too strong and they move to Alphatia." She paused. "That's what his family said, anyway."
Pound Cake began toddling towards Pinkie's shelf of weird stuff and she pulled him back.
"Well, I do know some stallions," I said hesitantly. I have to know everyone as the bard, and I get on well with stallions even if I'm not into them like that. Maybe *because*, so there's no messy business between us about who may or may not sleep with who.
"Or was it Norwold..." Pinkie mused, then pulled Pound Cake away from her bookshelf. Not that he... well, he is a Pegasus, but I don't think they can fly until later.
"So who is watching Pumpkin Cake?" I asked.
"Oh, I'm watching bo..."
There was a great and terrible silence.
"PUMPKIN CAKE WHERE ARE YOU!" Pinkie shouted and ran off to find her, while I followed, keeping Pound Cake suspended in the air.
If you have ever wondered, a baby Unicorn can try to eat ten pounds of sugar, but it won't actually *work* very well.
Pinkie and I worked on my music for a while once we had both kids; I had to meet Bon-Bon later for dinner, but I had time to wander around; you can't see Vanya this time of day but I looked up at the sky and wondered how much of the books are true and how much is false and if I will ever find out one day.
I want to go there for a long visit. See if he's real. I want to sail the canals and cross the deserts and fight angry fire-lion-scorpion beetles in an arena.
And I think one day I will. With Bon-Bon by my side. Whatever happens, we'll face it together.
But she *has* to stop calling them Potato People!
At least Pinkie believes it too. Admittedly, she also believes the Seaponies only sing Do-Wop and I had to try to explain otherwise to her.
Man, I do admit this.
I am totally going to enjoy sitting... I almost forgot!
This poses a problem, as it was unwise of me to accept a letter to deliver to Rainbow Dash, when she lives up in a flying house.
So I had to go to plan B, where I bought a paper cup and filled it with water, lifted it up to her house and dumped it on her head as she slept on her front porch.
"Dash, I have a letter for you!" I shouted.
She flew down and shook herself off on me while I laughed. "Since when did you deliver mail?"
"Since I ran into Gilda in Glantri," I said softly.
Dash froze and I tossed her the letter.
Dash finally breathed out. "So she's working as a bodyguard. Is she... okay?"
"Well, I'd say the people we fought together were a lot less okay than her in the end," I told Dash.
"You fought... you and Gilda fought..." Dash was vibrating, producing small chaotic puffs of wind.
So I told her the whole story.
"You going back any time soon?" Dash asked hesitantly.
"I think Bon-Bon is going to study for a permanent license from the Great School to facilitate selling her candies there and things," I told Dash. "We'll have to go at some point. So what exactly happened, anyway?"
Then Dash told me *her* story.
"And now you're a teacher and she's a bodyguard," I said.
"And you're teaching too, you know," Dash said.
"...." I totally forgot about that; they want better music training and I am the Town Bard.
Dash began rolling around laughing and pointing.
I think I had better get to work.
******************
Bon-Bon's Becoming:
It was nice to be home; When Lyra came back from the library, we simply went out to eat for dinner, since we had nothing fresh to cook with; I'll have to go shopping tomorrow. Lyra was going to work on her songs and prepare for teaching soon, but I had a mission.
I headed over to Berry's house and knocked on the door.
Pinchy answered; her proper name is Ruby Pinch, but it's her nickname. The same way Dinky is short for some thirty syllable long name I cannot even pronounce, or so Time Turner claims. She looked larger than I remembered her. But it's been... it hasn't been that long, has it?
Anyway, Pinchy's a good kid. "Aunt Bon-Bon, you're back!" she said, hugging me tightly.
"This is for you," I said, pulling a badly wrapped present out of my saddlebags. Herr Rolf is a great alchemist and golem maker but even with hands, he is no good at wrapping.
Neither am I, so she probably thought I wrapped it.
"Oh wow!" she said excitedly and tore it open with her magic; it was a little golem-pony, made of red gold. "What's his name?"
"You get to name him," I told her.
"Then I name him Iron Pony!" she said excitedly.
He whinnied and she smiled and let me in, running around the living room with him; he's really scaled more for a foal to play with but there wasn't time to make something bigger. But Pinchy had fun anyway.
"Pinchy, what are you..." Berry Punch began, galloping out from the kitchen to the living room. She lives over her shop, which is down below us; I came in the back way. She also has a farm house for her, well, farm, where she grows her berries and grapes.
"Hi, Berry," I said, laying out the present I got her. "This is magically preserved, but only until you open it." Prince Jaggar said it was laid down by a dragon who made wine!
She opened it and stared. "I could buy half the farms in Ponyville for the cost of this!"
She has to be exaggerating; Prince Jaggar wouldn't even let me pay for it.
"Well, you can keep it in case of fiscal crisis, then," I said hesitantly.
"Come in, I'll open something for you," she said. We sat in the kitchen and had grape juice with Pinchy; she's brewing up some huge stewpot of something, though it's kind of late for dinner and enough for ten ponies.
I told her about my adventures and she shared the latest town gossip. Berry hears just about everything that happens. "The oddest thing is that some mare in a leather jacket with badges all over it came into town, beat up Ponet and then left. No one knows who she is, why she came here, what she wanted, what he did to her, nothing. Then some stallion with an umbrella dragged her off and they were never seen again. Not that he didn't have it coming," Berry said, grimacing.
"Oh yeah," I agreed.
Pinchy began running amok with her toy and ran right out of the room.
"I was worried that was too young for her; she's growing up so fast," I said softly.
"She may hate it tomorrow. She's at that stage where you kind of bounce back and forth and today you want to be an adult and tomorrow, you want to be a little kid," Berry said softly, staring into her cup.
"Is there a colt?" I asked softly.
"Not yet, but she'll likely have colts all over her soon; you can see how big she's getting," Berry said, sounding worried. Berry was the first one of our class to get a cutie mark and then she just grew like crazy.
"Is she old enough to be alone for an hour or two?" I asked thoughtfully.
"I wish I could go out but I have to be responsible, because when I'm not some disaster happens," Berry said, sounding frustrated. "You were lucky, Bon-Bon."
I know. I know. "Come outside with me," I told her.
"Pinchy!" she shouted.
Pinchy skidded into the room with Iron Pony trying to keep up. "Yeah, Mom?"
"We're going outside," she told Pinchy.
"Okay!" Pinchy said and went running off.
We went outside and down the back ramp, through the alley behind some houses to the street.
"Does everyone dress like that in Glantri?" she asked softly.
"They often dress fancier than this," I told her, suddenly realizing I was still in one of the dresses Rarity had made for me; I need to find out how to wash them properly; I'm not used to fancy materials.
You know how you hear a train coming and then it passes you and then it goes past you and the whistle sound it makes changes? This happened to us just as Berry was about to say something. But it wasn't a train, it was Rarity wailing incoherently. She was chasing what appeared to be some sort of high speed mobile bundle of cloth, roughly the size and shape of a filly, which was somehow flying just above the ground at high speed and also screaming.
Distantly, I heard Sweetie shouting something incoherent too but she couldn't keep up with either of these things.
Berry just stared, and I decided to wait for them to pass; I think maybe Scootaloo had somehow become swaddled in cloth and was fleeing that way.
I never found out what happened.
That's okay.
Once they were gone, I said to her softly, "Ever wondered what it's like to fly?"
"Pegasi make it look awesome," Berry said. "I rode a Pegasus one time, it was pretty cool and terrifying at once." She looked up at the sky; clouds gently drifted on an east wind but you could see the declining moon and the stars.
I pulled out two lemon candies. "Want to find out?"
Her eyes widened. "What's this?"
"Earth pony magic," I said, smiling. Then I ate one and turned into a Pegasus.
She stared, eyes wide.
"Just think about turning into a Pegasus," I told her.
Blam, Pegasus Berry!
So I took her up to Rainbow Dash's house and told her about what Crash had figured out. "Oh wow," she said thoughtfully. "We do use a variation on that for formation flying but of course, normally anyone we fly with wouldn't *need* it. But I bet that would help anyone using Twilight's spell or your candy or..."
Pretty soon, she got two other pegasi and we all did it together, so Berry could see what speed is REALLY like.
It's a rush, I have to confess.
Then I took her home; she was utterly wiped out but it felt wonderful. "If people had tried to kill us, that would be my whole trip in a nutshell."
"Alchemy society, hmm, well, I am a chemist, one could say..." She said hesitantly.
"We'll see," I told her. "I'm just an initiate, but I expect we'll have a branch in Equestria as it comes along." I gave her a hug. "I have a ton of work to catch up on, but it was worth it."
A while back, Lyra forced me to read the first Tom Wagonmaker book, potato-people and all. Though I guess maybe I misread something as that world looked terrible for potatoes. But there was one bit I liked, the end.
No, not... okay, because it was the end. But also, I thought it was kind of wise. It said that every time you go on a journey, you can never return, because the 'you' that comes back is different.
Edmund Wheatfurrows was right. I am Bon-Bon the ordinary pony, and I am Bon-Bon the party girl, even if she mostly has to sleep for now, and I am Lady Bon-Bon of Ponyville, who gives lectures to wizards and Lady Bon-Bon of the First Circle of Alchemy and Phoenix-Bon and Bon-Bon the Pegasus and many other things besides. I have changed, I am changing, and I will change in the future. Everything changes.
My candy art always changes and now it lets me change my form as I need, while time and trial change what lies inside me. I was never 'just' an ordinary pony. Maybe no one is. And that's why Celestia sent Lyra and I on that trip in the Moonraker. She saw what we could become.
Does that make us special? Or does it just mean we chose to step up to the plate when we had to? I don't know.
I thought about that plateau and the evil stirring there. Not my problem for now, but I doubt we have seen the last of that. But I leave it to the Princess. I may not be ordinary but I'm not up to dealing with something like that under my own initiative.
Yet.
The End For Now |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Short Story 4: A Proper Lady | "Fluvia Grace must have the *finest* dress in all the lands of human, pony, or elf," the strange pony in my shop said to me; she was overdressed for the season with a black furry rounded hat on her head, trimmed in white fur, a huge black shawl around her neck, and a long black dress trimmed with white fur which was elegant but baggy, not well fitted to her body. "Fluvia has heard that Rarity is the finest of all seamstresses, who can make a dress for *anyone*."
Fluvia Grace was an Earth Pony, her coat pale yellow with a long blue mane that flowed in long locks around her neck and shoulders. She constantly shivered as if eager to spring into action but holding herself back.
"You have come to the right place," I told her. "Black is really not your color, but let's see..."
"Fluvia always wears black, it is her signature!" she said proudly. "Like a magnificent Orca!"
I have never had a customer who wanted to appear like a whale. Well, I can suggest alternatives at least, though I now feared this would end badly.
"Also, it must handle water well," Fluvia continued. "And match my hat."
Hmm, I am loaded with felt, but the hat has a fur outer layer, and I am short on black and white fur. The hat actually is nice, so perhaps I don't have to replace it.
"What sort of fur is this?" I asked curiously, touching the white fur trim of her current dress.
"Polar Bear, of course!" she said proudly.
Of course.
Polar bears and whales.
Where am I going to get polar bear fur in Equestria? Unless... Idea!
If you shave a shapeshifted druid, they'll grow back, right?
I wouldn't want to leave Fluttershy naked, but surely a druid can trivially repair such a thing.
In fact, so many kinds of fur...
It was hard to wipe the bits from my eyes. I couldn't let Fluttershy shave me for something like this, so I can't ask her, but now the idea won't leave my head.
I'll figure out something.
"Where did you buy this?" I asked her curiously. "I don't recognize the style."
"Kaarjala! It's a long trip, but the cool waters of the north are very relaxing in the summer," she said. "And my beloved loves to go there to train!"
I've never even heard of it. "I will do my best, but I must regretfully inform you that I am not used to Kaarjalan fashions," I told her. It galled me to admit it, but there is normally little call for such styles here. But I will learn! I must be ready for the next time.
There *will* be a next time if I do a good job here.
"Stargazer assured Fluvia you are a great fashionista, so Fluvia has confidence in you! Stargazer is always well-dressed," Fluvia said firmly.
And it all gets destroyed by the end, then she has to buy more clothing from me. That's Stargazer. She's a Unicorn adventuress who summons constellation spirits. And gets into dangerous adventures which leave her clothing in tatters on a regular basis but give her the money to buy more. "Oh, you're a friend of Stargazer," I said warmly. Stargazer's purchases paid for my new bed, the last repairs on my roof, and a new oven, among other things.
Oh, I should get Marcus to study those gems she paid me with last time and determine if they're safe to use! Wherever I put them.
"She is my wicked rival in love," Fluvia wailed. "She is a terrible person." She dramatically fainted, crashing into my model-horses, which fell on her.
Best not to stick my head into this. I began magically lifting my modelhorses back into place as she got up. "I will create some mockups today but I have to see about getting the right kind of fur for you, and that may take a while."
"Fluvia has to go visit the local druid, so she can stick around town a few days," she told me.
"Oh, you know Fluttershy?" I asked; she'd never mentioned Fluvia.
"That's her name, yes! Her... Fluvia doesn't know the right word... Fluvia has been sent to help her practice elemental forms," Fluvia said. "And seeing your shop, I thought I would try it out, since Stargazer is always so well dressed."
Ahh, she seeks to outdo her rival. I will have to put some extra effort into this. I understand how she must feel. Not that I have a romantic rival at present, but I have been there.
I gave her the directions and was busy with a tentative design when there was a loud crashing noise, followed by a scream and the sound of my mailbox dying again.
Fluvia was outside before I could go check, and as I came out, I heard her yelling about mimics. Everything was now wet, my mailbox was smashed into tiny bits and Ditzy, Sweetie, and her friends were all tangled into a knot on the ground as Fluvia jumped up and down on the remains of my mailbox. "It will never menace the innocent again!" she said, then struck a heroic pose.
My mail was now sopping wet, though one of the items was a scrollcase sealed with both the Aendyr seal and Lady Aendyr's personal seal! I secured that, then helped everyone up. "Should I even ask?"
"No, never ever ask," Scootaloo said bitterly.
"I'm sorry," Ditzy said. "Dinky dear, no fogbanks at ground level!"
"Sorry, Mom," Dinky said, hanging her head.
I could tell this would be a long day; I would save the letter to be dessert to wash the aggravation out of my mouth.
******************
A Proper Lady
A Rarity Story by John Biles
Part of the Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring continuity.
*******************
"Blue is a good color for you," I told Berry Punch. "So what's the occasion?" I asked curiously; she'd come in and wanted a very fancy dress. More expensive than anything I have ever seen her wear.
She mumbled something incoherent, then said, "I may also end up needing one for Ruby, but she's starting her growth spurt and I'm wary to buy anything that won't fit her in a few months."
"I know, Sweetie is the same way," I told her, shaking my head as I measured her. "Is this for show or will you need to move a lot, such as dancing?"
"Show, to look respectable and wise," Berry said, licking her lips but trying to hide she was doing it.
Making Berry look wise will be a challenge, I thought. She tends to be 'lively', more than wise. "So this is for your business?"
"Yes," she said, shifting on her hooves.
A stallion? No. She does not have the look of love, and yet something more is going on here.
Well, I will do my best for her. As I do for everyone.
I took her measurements and idly began planning out ideas I could show her tomorrow, while she took off.
Eventually, Sweetie showed up with a dozen pinecones stuck to her and I had to help her get clean of them. While we were doing that, Marcus came home and began making us dinner.
I had to take a bath myself once Sweetie was clean, and I read the scroll while luxuriating in my bath. The writing was clear and precise with a steady hand, the sort I pride myself on. Twilight can write much faster than me, but it's sloppy and she relies too much on dictation to Spike.
My writing is precise and beautiful, like my correspondent's style of writing. It was enjoyable even to look at.
Dear Countess Rarity,
I hope you are well. Darien and I must attend to some business for Prince Aendyr in Canterlot, so I thought we would come to visit you and Marcus if that is acceptable; we'll bring Samantha, of course; she's eager to meet her uncle. Darien would like to see your friend's museum; he has an interest in Blackmorian era history. I understand it's in Canterlot?
I would like to commission some clothing for Samantha and myself by you; the tailors here only know one style of clothing for nobles and I cannot wear twelve minutely different versions of the same dress without feeling quite strange. Darien grew up with it but I did not.
We will be coming in a week; please reply as soon as you can. I look forward to meeting you face to face.
Yours in Wizardry,
Lady Helga Aendyr.
The second page was a new spell she'd sent me, but this... oh this...
I had to restrain myself from a total frenzy of joy, or else the bathwater would slop on the floor. But you should imagine it as if I bounced around inside my own mind in the way I expect Pinkie would if she could fit into my mind.
Making clothing for nobles, a visit from foreign nobility to *my* store. Time spent with a *real* lady. I love my friends, but Fluttershy, who could be so elegant, foreswears it to dodge attention and the rest of them... they simply are not elegant. They have many fine features, and I love them dearly, but I was already imagining a pleasant tea with a lady of quality who will not stuff cupcakes in her mouth or belch or have to suddenly run away to help a squirrel or get distracted by a book she's reading or...
I hope I do not sound ungrateful for my friends. But this is something I have always dreamed of. To be part of noble society, if only for a little while. With a real lady!
I will have to dress up Marcus appropriately. And I need to know her colors, her coat... skin tone... Fabrics must be ordered, so much to do.
But I was happy to do it!
*****************
"Kaarjala is a magical place," Lyra said excitedly to me; I'd found her on a bench, strumming her harp and singing strange fragments of lyrics, as if time was somehow skipping over bits of the song. She had looked frustrated, but now she smiled.
Bon-Bon was hard at work in one of the town gardens, feeding the flowers, even though it will be running of the leaves time soon and most will have to be replaced as it gets colder and they die.
I know the basics of gardening; it is a hobby fit for a lady of refinement. Such as myself.
"They raise herds of reindeer, who pull sleds for them and migrate around; they grow crops near volcanic outlets, hunt, and fish along the half-frozen sea. During part of the year, the sun *never sets*. I would love to see that," Lyra said excitedly.
"You'll be seeing a hoof to the posterior from the Mayor if you don't finish your song for the Running of the Leaves," Bon-Bon said, then dug in her saddlebags.
"I wrote this awesome song... but it's totally wrong for the Running of the Leaves," Lyra said, flopping onto her side and splaying out on the bench. "Also, Princess Luna sealed part of it to the throne."
"I... what?" I asked in confusion.
"It means Lyra can't perform the fourth verse without royal permission; it has secrets," Bon-Bon said. She now began to sprinkle a blue powder and work it in with her hooves; some wilted flowers now perked up.
"The best verse, so exciting," Lyra moaned.
She always says that.
"Why not compare the falling of the leaves to the start of a new school year as students move forward and so do the seasons?" I said. It was my only idea. Terrible, but I felt I ought to help.
"Hey! Yeah! I'm teaching!" Lyra said. "Man, it's a pity this isn't when they graduate, it would strengthen the metaphor..."
"Do you know what Kaarjalan clothing looks like?" I asked her.
She tried to describe it, but it was like asking Scootaloo, but with more syllables. All enthusiasm and shouting.
I will have to consult with Twilight. Which means seeing Spike, which is likely to be awkward.
"Bon-Bon, can I buy a few of your candies? The strongest flavors." Spike favors strong flavors in his food.
"I'm not fully stocked but..." She dug out a dozen candies, sang their praises, and I bought two for myself and four for Spike and two for Twilight. Then I bought the rest for the next time I see Pinkie, since she loves candy.
Okay, time for the library.
*****************
Kaarjalan fashion is all designed around furs for the cold weather and tends to be dark so it will absorb heat. I was surprised to find Twilight so versed in it; she is normally no fashion buff.
"I did a paper for Humanics II on the Kaarjalans and how they adapted to their cold environment," Twilight said. "I have it somewhere... SPIKE!"
He'd not been out and about when I arrived.
Dinky, who was shelving books high above us, shouted down, "He's hiding in the basement!"
Distantly, I heard Spike say something angry and I sighed.
Twilight pulled down a book. "I'll check my files myself, but it may still be in my tower in Canterlot." She galloped off and I began studying the pictures; the book was titled 'Adventures in Norwold' and dealt with Far Northeastern Brun's regions.
I heard a creaky noise and Dinky said, "Rainbow Dash, you don't have to come in the window, you know."
Dash, her mouth full of the strap of a saddlebag, didn't say anything, she just flew down towards my table, saw me looking at her, stopped, then said, "I was just passing by and found someone abandoned these books." This caused her to drop them.
Towards Twilight; I reached out and stopped them in time. "Dash, darling, we all know you read now. And Lady Aendyr wants to see your museum with her family."
"Oooh, cool!" Dash said, rearing with excitement. "Not tomorrow, I hope. I have to help whip up four days of hideous rain."
"What, now?" Twilight said, frowning.
"The zapapples need zapping, I think," Dash said, waving a hoof vaguely as I lowered the books down to the table. "Hey there, Twi."
"I hear the Mayor always orders bad weather this time of year because it's when an ex broke up with her long ago and she wants to *brood*," Dinky said from high atop a ladder. "And the first game of the hoofball season always gets rained out."
Father would not be happy, I thought. But he's still off on the frontier as usual.
Wait, I am going to need to make *everyone* suitable outfits for meeting a lady!
Dash eyed me warily. "Rarity, I don't need rain clothing or whatever." She began to back up.
"I... wait, what?" Twilight said, confused. "Oh, you done with these books?"
"I just fou... yes," Dash mumbled.
"I have the next set ready," Twilight said, lifting a loaded saddlebag to her. "Good luck with your class!" She laid out her paper on the table. "Read this, Rarity. Why do you need to know about Kaarjalan fashion, anyway?"
"Stupid reindeer, think they're so big," Dash grumbled.
"It's for a client; she has friends who pay me well, so I want to do my best for her, but it's all fur and black and she wants to look like a *whale*," I said mournfully. "Everyone in Canterlot will think me a fool if I let a customer look like a sea mammal."
"A whale?" Twilight said, stunned.
"Well, Orcas look kind of they're in tuxedos," Rainbow Dash mused thoughtfully, now coming down to land by us. "But whales don't have fur." She paused. "Right?"
"It's for the weather," I told her. "The fur keeps you warm in the very cold weather there."
"Well, I guess she has to learn the hard way like we did," Twilight said hesitantly.
Maybe Fluttershy will have some insight on how to do this and make it look good.
Or at least she'll know what Orcas are like.
"STAY IN THE SADDLEBAG," I heard Pinkie shout outside the library.
We all turned, looked, and waited, but Pinkie did not come inside.
I may never know what that was about, I suppose.
"Oh yes, I need a book on Blackhill cuisine and anything on customs," I told Twilight. "I suppose you wouldn't have any recent on Glantrian fashion."
"Not much call for it here," Twilight said apologetically. "But I *can* help you with the former!" She dragged me off to the geography section and soon gave me more books than I had time for.
But Twilight is nothing if not thorough. "Thank you, dear," I told her. "You always very helpful."
"I just love to share knowledge," she said with a happy sigh. "So I take it Helga is coming?"
I blinked. "Did she write you too?"
"Well, she lives in Blackhill and is close friends with Marcus, so I assumed it had to be connected," Twilight said.
"Dinky, I don't need a book on the care and feeding of evil twins," Rainbow Dash said distantly to Dinky.
"Trust me, *everyone* should read this book," Dinky said urgently.
My twin is not evil, just a little vain and a little too greedy for her own good. To be honest, I am a little jealous of her, she's been so successful...
Except that was all imaginary, it suddenly hit me. I don't know for sure where she is or what she's doing, and I suddenly felt guilty. She is my sister, whether we chose it or not, and I should watch out for her.
I ought, at the least, to put her in contact with Rainbow Dash's mother, who could help her get started. And I should help.
So much to do, so little time, I don't know how I ever make it work.
"So how exactly does the couch just appear when you need it?" Twilight asked curiously.
I hadn't even realized I was *on* my fainting couch!
Instinct, a magical thing.
I got up and made it vanish. "It's magic, darling. An old instinctive trick of mine." That reminded me. I passed her the candy I got for Spike. "This is for Spike, when he comes out of hiding. You should probably tell him it's from someone else, though." I sighed. I have no idea what to do. I let things drag on too long because I was flattered. "The two blue ones are for you."
Maybe Lady Aendyr will have some idea; a fine lady of distinction likely has had many suitors.
So have I, but it was different; I was young, they were young, we were all foolish and... to be honest, many of them certainly were less noble than Spike at his best.
But so was I, sometimes.
"I'll tell him I bought it," Twilight said. "It was very nice of you to get him some." She pocketed hers in her saddlebags and I prayed she wouldn't forget it existed for weeks.
Especially because she would eat it without thinking about it. She's rather used to Spike vetting her food.
"Bon-Bon and Lyra helped me out some and I wanted to repay her," I told Twilight. "Okay, I have lots of reading to do and other things, so I fear I must go."
"I was glad to see you," Twilight said.
"I don't need to know about Cone People!" Rainbow Dash said distantly.
"And I think Dash needs you," I continued.
"Yes, Dinky means well but can be overenthusiastic," Twilight said ruefully, then raced to Dash's aid as I headed out to see Fluttershy before going home.
**************
I should, of course, have foreseen that Fluvia would be at Fluttershy's, so I was unable to make my inquiries as I had hoped. We did have a nice tea party which was quite relaxing and I now know what an Orca looks like and acts like.
In great detail.
Then we went outside into the yard near the river and Fluvia said, "Behold, the power of water!" She transformed into a huge water elemental, spinning in place like a tornado. Fluttershy tried to do the same but ended up just falling on her face and looking frustrated.
"You must be a very powerful druid," I said to Fluvia.
"Fluvia specializes in water, of course," she told me.
Hence the love of Orcas, I suppose.
"Fluvia has been kind enough to come help me train," Fluttershy said to me, then sighed. "Turning into elementals is hard."
"You can do it," I told her.
"If Stargazer can walk twenty feet without tripping over her own hooves, you can do this," Fluvia-elemental said firmly. "You are far less wicked and prone to tempt innocent young colts." She then turned back to normal. "Perhaps we should spend some time in the water, so you can learn its soul."
"And I will bid you farewell. Thank you for the party, Fluttershy."
She smiled at me. "I am no Pinkie, but I do think I throw a good party."
And then they jumped in the river and turned into sea ponies and began swimming around. Seaponies are rather like mermaids but the front half is a pony front half. We don't see them much here, though at times, they have come up the river.
Anyway, I had things to do, which included buying white fur; I will likely have to have it shipped from Canterlot.
A woman's work is never done.
***************
As I headed home, hoping Marcus had already started dinner, I saw Sweetie suddenly crash out her bedroom window and into the sky, howling.
I reached out with my magic and seized her, straining; I am very nimble with my magic but not so strong; Twilight would have caught her without even trying, I fear. I could feel a powerful breeze pouring out of the window and I sighed.
"Sweetie, did you *read my mail* again?" I asked as I lowered her to the ground.
"She always sends you cool spells," Sweetie mumbled. "And Marcus didn't need help cooking."
More precisely, Marcus likely didn't want Sweetie's help. I love my sister dearly but she cannot cook her way out of a wet paper bag.
I'm surprised she didn't talk him into it, but probably the lure of new magic drew her to read my mail.
The spell in question lets you call up powerful winds. For battering your foes in combat, I think, though you could also power a ship with it.
I haven't dared to try it, as I would need time to go somewhere that I would not, for example, break my own windows. "Sweetie, go to the glassware shop and get a new window and we'll install it after dinner. Then we'll discuss how you'll pay for it."
"No, my precious allowance gone!" she wailed, rolling around on the ground.
Now she was muddy and covered in twigs, yet still in trouble. "That only works on Father, dear," I told her. "Best you hurry, or dinner will be cold when you return."
Wailing, she headed out.
*****************
"Oooh, broccoli," I said. "How do you get it to not overcook?" It seems like it goes from stiff and rubbery to mushy in five seconds. Five seconds you can't predict. For some reason, Scootaloo was on the counter near the stove, flapping her wings at the broccoli.
"Constant monitoring," Marcus said as he stirred the noodles. "We have a carrot salad thanks to Scootaloo, who will be dining with us, if you don't mind."
"I'm controlling the heat precisely," Scootaloo said proudly.
I hope the counter can hold her; she's starting to grow, though she hasn't grown too large for the counter yet.
"Did Sweetie talk you into cooking so she could go monkey with magic she wasn't ready for yet?" I said sternly to Scootaloo.
"I volunteered, since it means not eating carrots! The salad is *all yours*," Scootaloo said, making a face. "Is Sweetie okay?" she asked, worried.
"I'm surprised you didn't check on her," I told Scootaloo.
"I can't leave until this is done and Marcus said she would be okay," Scootaloo said. "She is okay, right?" Now she sounded worried.
"I knew she was okay," Marcus said. "I know the difference between a scream of surprise and a scream of pain."
I winced at that; my darling has had a rough life. "Anything I need to do to help?"
"If you can scramble two eggs for me, I'd be grateful," Marcus said.
"Easy," I told her and went to work, telling them about my day.
"We learned about heat control today," Scootaloo then said excitedly. "My pegasi weather course is REALLY cool."
She and her friends are back in school now. It does feel weird being alone during the day sometimes, when the house is so full at night now.
Oh yes!
"Lady Aendyr is coming to visit," I told Marcus. I told him everything and then had to fan myself to calm down. "I'll have to make you something suitable for a noblewoman's visit. Oh dear, where will they *stay*? I suppose if Sweetie stays with my sister... but then they'd have to sleep with their daughter, which might be crowded..."
Plus, my house is basically a hovel compared to how she must live.
I would hate to make her stay at the hotel and really even our hotel would be a hovel by comparison.
"Samantha could sleep in Sweetie's room and they'll both fit in the bedroom and if I get Twilight to lock Darien in at night, he might not find a way to try to kill me in my sleep," Marcus said thoughtfully.
"I can pick a lock with my tongue now!" Scootaloo said proudly. ...
"That would be a useful skill but human tongues are not very flexible," Marcus said regretfully. "Or I would have to ask you to teach me."
"You can do it in your pony form!" Scootaloo now began demonstrating on an invisible lock and I tried to get control of this conversation.
"I am sure he will act with honor and dignity. He sounds a fine fellow from her letters," I told Marcus.
"He hates me with all the hatred Orcus has for everything that exists," Marcus said mournfully, then drained the noodles. "Okay, as soon as Sweetie returns, we can eat."
"Dear, you are exaggerating. Why does he hate you so much, anyway?" I asked; it's something I've never understood.
"Darien is made of pure liquid hate, frozen into hate-ice by the cold winds at his command," Marcus said mournfully as he prepared four plates of food. "I would think he was Loki, but Loki has fashion-sense."
"Honey, you are exaggerating," I said as we headed over to the table.
Sweetie stumbled in, still needing more grooming, which I began providing. "The window is in my room."
It's most annoying because it's a new room. Marcus and I needed our own space, so I finally broke down and added a few new rooms. The hard part was ensuring my home stayed round and conveyed the right look.
Marcus cut his eggs and mixed them into his pasta, which seems strange to me but he does need his protein. He now gave Sweetie a lecture on responsible magic use, while Scootaloo snickered the whole time and wolfed down food like crazy.
I'd thought he made too much but Sweetie and Scootaloo each ate enough for two mares.
Then we had to install the window. Scootaloo was kind of enough to help, so I will have to do something nice for her later. Once *that* was done, Marcus went over the books with me and drew a rough picture of Lady Aendyr and her husband I could use to think of ideas, though I'll need... surely she can send me her measurements.
I am just so excited about this.
"But why does Darien hate you?" I asked after all this. I still had no straight answer.
"He is a giant asshole and thinks I endanger his wife and daughter by simply existing," Marcus said wearily, flopping out on the bed.
"Well, this trip should show him not to worry," I told Marcus.
"I hope so," Marcus said. "I'm sure Helga will enjoy it. I know she wants to meet you."
"And I am eager to meet Lady Aendyr," I told him, carefully lying down on the bed as well. It wasn't bedtime yet but we deserved a rest after hard work.
"Just call her Helga. She's no fancy lady," Marcus told me.
"She is a noblewoman of Glantri," I said a little chidingly. "And deserves to be treated as such."
"So are you," Marcus pointed out. "Well, of Equestria. Countess Rarity."
It's not the same; I don't... I can't live like a countess. Not with my income. But maybe one day...
Which reminds me, I need to check on Clarity. Later. I am tired and must rest.
****************
The next day, I got up and went to work as usual; part of my time was spent on my customers of the day and part on Fluvia's dress and part on planning for the visit, exchanging letters with Lady Aendyr and visiting stores. Lady Aendyr has these wonderful scroll cases; a very simple spell will teleport them between us, which is good because I can't possibly ask Spike to send mail for me now and conventional means would take weeks.
By around four PM, I was exhausted, lying down in front of effort twelve to create a whale-themed dress and flailing my legs in the air in frustration. I was too tired to even summon my fainting couch, hard as the floor is.
"A Drellbian fang beast!" Ditzy shouted and now pounced on the dress; she soon was tangled on it, rolling around the floor as letters and scroll cases spilled out of her saddlebag, half-covering me and everything else.
I didn't care. This project is a failure and I might as well *die* buried in mail. They can pour bronze over me and display me as a warning to overly ambitious ponies in the future.
Ditzy made a noise like the end of time and burst free, shreds of black cloth and faux fur flying everywhere; this was only a test, so I was saving the good fur for when I figure out how to do this.
If I *ever* figure out.
There is nothing less fashionable or elegant than a *whale*.
Nothing.
Also, Kaarjalan fashions are hard to adapt to ponies. And none of the books indicate *at all* how their reindeer dress. Surely they can't go naked in weather that cold.
"The fangbeast is fallen," Ditzy said proudly. She paused and studied the scraps of cloth. "Oh dear, was this a fangbeast costume?"
"Yes," I said. I don't know what it is but it can't be as bad as a *whale*.
"I am so sorry!" she said frantically, and then began gathering her mail, hoofing several letters over to me and knocking others off me. Then she tossed me several bits. "Does this cover the damage?"
It is nice to see someone responsible. "Yes," I told her. While it didn't fully cover the damage, I know she's trying to raise a filly on her own and doesn't make a huge amount of money.
She gave a sigh of relief. "Okay, I can beg Carrot Top for some carrots tonight instead of buying that soup," she said softly; I don't think I was supposed to hear it and now I winced.
But if I say anything, she'll be humiliated. I made myself get up. Once she took off, though, I headed over to Twist's family's restaurant to have them deliver some sandwiches to Ditzy. Hopefully, she won't be too proud to take them.
I didn't realize she was riding the ragged edge so closely. I'll have to see what I can do about that.
Later, as I had to meet Berry Punch and Ruby so as to get Ruby's measurements for *her* dress. At least that would be straightforward.
******************
"So what is your Cutie Mark for?" I asked Ruby curiously as I took her measurements.
"I'm super-lucky!" Ruby said cheerfully. "I won Mom the money for these dresses in a poker game!"
"You weren't supposed to tell anyone!" Berry Punch said frantically, flailing her forelegs.
Better keep her away from Marcus, I thought.
Other than that, everything went smoothly and I was busy showing cloth samples to Berry when suddenly my storage room was full of screaming and the sound of everything falling down.
"I didn't do it!" Ruby said desperately.
"Of course not, dear," Berry said, though she now studied Ruby suspiciously.
I galloped into my storage room and found that Ivan was here, buried in rolls of cloth; somehow everything had fallen off the shelves and a roll of blue cloth was half unrolled on the floor with his foot tangled in it.
"Dammit," he mumbled.
"What happened?" I asked, confused and beginning to tidy up.
"This was the closest large shadow to you but there was a roll on the floor and as I appeared, my foot landed on it, it moved and everything went down on me," Ivan said, helping me to clean up, though I had to reposition everything after he tried to put it away.
This room has a *plan*, you see.
"Marcus will be home in an hour or two," I told Ivan. I must admit I am a little jealous of his cutie mark trick. Power. Whatever the right word is. It's a gift from his sponsor, I know that. Being able to go to Glantri or Canterlot with a thought and a shadow would be quite useful.
"Luna will be coming to our little shindig when Helga gets here," he told me.
This was both thrilling and absolutely terrifying.
A *princess* coming to my party! To my home. I mean, I've met Luna before but I haven't been in charge of entertaining her.
I don't even know how to entertain a Princess, specifically.
I immediately threw out all my plans for everyone's clothing because it would not do with Luna coming. Fortunately, some of the designs, I could just upgrade cloth quality... Where can I even get samite in Ponyville?
Ivan can go get it and BRING IT, I realized.
"Rarity, why are you looking at me like that?" he said warily.
"Ivan, I need you to run a few errands for me and..." He was wearing a white cotton shirt, leather pants, leather jacket... he looked like he was going to star in some musical about rebellious teens. "Ivan, that outfit is completely unsuitable for a party of this caliber! How can you possibly wear something like that when a princess is coming?" I asked frantically.
"I wear this with Luna all the time," he said hesitantly.
"This will not do *at all* for a party of this quality!" I said. "Come out and get naked. We're going to have to start layer by layer!"
His jaw dropped. "What?"
My brain then remembered he is human and getting naked casually is a huge social faux paux with them. "I am sorry, Ivan, I forgot you were not a pony." I tittered nervously. "But we will have to take measurements and start fresh so you will fit in. Just come out and sit down; I'll finish Berry and Ruby and then we'll get you started."
I can't believe I even told him to get naked. I sound like Applejack.
I am going to have to have a lie down after this, I thought.
Oh my Celestia, I have to do outfits for *everyone*. Surely they'll all want to come and I will have to wrestle down Applejack to get her to dress up and... Why is the door not opening?
"Rarity, why are you walking into the wall over and over?" Ivan asked me, standing at the door.
I definitely cannot have any more coffee today.
*******************
There's probably no way to add a ballroom to the house in only five days. But where am I going to find one for rent *here*?
Lyra is going to rustle up some friends to play music but... Samantha! She's going to need kids to play with or she'll destroy everything. I know how fillies are.
Well, I can rope Sweetie and her friends into riding herd on her.
I should ask if her unicorn friend, Sugar Sparkle, is coming with her.
Maybe Big Mac could make me a pavilion, yes, there's space behind the house and then we could fold it up and store it for later use. There's plenty of room... I had best go check with Big Mac *now* if he has free time.
"Rarity, are you going to run off without finishing dinner?" Sweetie asked, surprised.
I suddenly realized I was about to run off without actually eating most of my stew. Karameikan stew, made by Ivan; it's all garlic and potatoes and tomatoes and very tasty but I can't stop thinking.
"I am so sorry," I said. "Maybe... no, no, I must eat." So I made myself eat delicately like a lady like Mother when I wanted to wolf it down like Father and run off to consult with Big Mac... "Ivan, have you ever made a pavilion?"
"I am a decent carpenter but you're better off with a real expert," he said hesitantly.
EXCELLENT.
Calm down, calm down, I told myself. Eat like a lady.
"Rarity, you're eating from my bowl," Sweetie said chidingly, telekinesing hers out of my reach.
"Honey, count to ten and calm down. It's going to be fine. Just a little visit by friends," Marcus said, patting my back. Normally that soothes me but I have *so much work* to do!
"A Princess of Equestria and a Lady of Glantri are coming to my home! It is not *just* a little visit by friends," I said frantically. "This is not something which happens every day."
"Neither is you eating my food, but you just did," Sweetie said, going and getting herself more stew. "This is really good, Ivan."
"We ate this three, four times a week when I was a kid, so I kind of learned it well," Ivan said. "My folks probably still eat this three or four times a week."
"Creatures of habit, I take it," I told him.
"Well, it's cheap, so they can save money for fancier meals on special times. We usually had rabbit or fish in it," Ivan said. He and Marcus both had fish in their bowls, in fact. Ivan had done up a fish for Opalesence as well, who was at her dish, eating daintily.
*Opalescence* will need a nice outfit or three also!
"And the other days of the week?" Sweetie asked.
"We typically had mushroom and garlic soup with fish on church days, garlic and weasel sandwiches every time father caught one of the damn things, garlic omelets once a week if the hens were laying, and every so often, we had venison, even though it was illegal," Ivan said.
"Why was it illegal?" Sweetie asked.
"They were on the lord's land, which he wouldn't let us clear so we could grow more crops. He had deer and other things he hunted in his woods. Lord Antonius loved hunting," Ivan said angrily. "More than he loved people. Still does, I expect." He sighed. "A few times a year, we got to have beef or pork. Especially harvest time; you ate until you were sick then." He smiled a little smile at the memory.
"You ate a lot of garlic," Sweetie said.
"It kept the vampires away," Ivan said and launched into a long story about vampires which soon had Sweetie hiding under the table. I ate, trying to maintain my decorum.
'You okay, dear?' Marcus asked me with a spell to link our minds. 'You seem jumpy.'
'I just want everything to go well and I have to see Big Mac before it's too late,' I told him.
'I'll clean up so you can go after you finish eating,' he told me.
'You are a dear,' I told him.
Finally, I finished eating and ran off to Applejack's.
*****************
"The line to hit on mah grandson starts behind the... oh, hi, Rarity, I didn't recognize yah through the door," Granny said to me, peering at me; it was dark now so I can see how she might mistake for someone less glamorous. Though my coat does usually shine in moonlight.
But also shows dirt far too well, which is among the reasons I hate dirt.
"Applejack's in the living room, havin' a tea party with Filthy," Granny said. "Is that Sweetie with you?" she peered at me.
I looked down and saw Winona panting next to me. "That's Winona, Granny Smith," I told her.
"I reckoned her mane didn't look quite right," Granny said. "Come on in."
I was somewhat stunned to find Applejack with Silver Fork (our town's silversmith and cutlery producer) and Filthy Rich, despite the warning; she was wearing a blue dress which I know I didn't make but had to come from *somewhere* and had her hair done up and was trying to be mannerly and I briefly feared her possessed. Or was this actually Apple Blossom?
They had tea and sandwiches and a similarly dressed Apple Bloom was helping her out, serving tea with her tail. The sandwiches weren't even all apple-themed, and now Twist came out in a fancy dress, bringing more tea.
"I'm sorry to interrupt," I said. "I need to hire Big Mac's services."
"You already have a coltfriend," Apple Bloom said accusingly.
"To build me a pavilion!" I told her.
"What in tarn..." Applejack began, then made a choking noise. "Dearest Rarity, whatever do you need a pavilion for?"
"I think the Town Hall has one," Twist said hesitantly.
"That's a carillon, dear," I told her. Then I told her about the upcoming visit of Lady Aendyr. And Princess Luna.
"The Princess is coming?" Silver Fork said, stunned. "Has the Mayor been notified? We must arrange something properly grand for her!"
"Exactly," I told him and we soon began exchanging ideas. This will be so much easier with some help.
*****************
I dreamed of whales circling me, mocking me with my inability to make a pretty dress like theirs. Then the sea ponies joined them and began singing counter point.
I awoke, sweaty and terrified, knowing Fluvia wouldn't stay in town forever, and I had to solve this problem before the festival; I talked to the Mayor before bed; it will be GRAND.
Suitable for a Lady and a Princess.
I should probably invite Celestia... once you have one Princess, it's hardly more work to have *two*.
Big Mac will need a suit... he still has one, right?
Right?
"Honey, go to sleep," Marcus said from the floor.
"Why are you on the floor?" I asked him in confusion.
"You were flailing and I couldn't wake you, so I had to get out of range," he said.
"I'm sorry, come to bed," I told him. I don't normally flail. I sleep *gracefully*.
Normally.
Warily, he got back up into bed. "Have you ever seen anything whale-themed that was elegant at all?" I asked him.
"Whales are really one of the least elegant things in the world," he told me.
Perhaps a giant storm will hit and blow us away to Skothar or something, buying me time...
But I would miss the party.
I am so doomed.
******************
"I have to teach. Just relax, I am sure Helga will be happy with any reception, it doesn't have to be the grandest thing ever," Marcus said to me.
I clapped my head with my hooves and immediately regretted it. "I have a reputation to uphold and Princess Luna is coming!" I said frantically.
"It'll be okay," he said, rubbing his forehead. "I'll be back after school, so you know where I am if there is an emergency."
Knowing, yet unable to get him, is not much help. I am going to need an assistant. Someone elegant... or at least sensible...
Twilight! She is good at organizing and this totally needs to be well organized. I think I hired a mangoon band and I don't even know what that is or where I hired them but it's on my done list.
When did I get a done list?
Sweetie nuzzled me. "Calm down, Rarity, it's going to be fine."
The sound of hammer and saw behind my home didn't help. Someone... Did I actually hire Big Mac or was that just a dream?
I tried to kiss Sweetie's forehead and nearly put my eye out with her horn. She's getting taller. So fast, really. In fact, she tripped on the threshold and took Marcus down; once I dusted them off, I rolled around on the floor, then realized what I was doing and galloped to the back.
Big Mac, Caramel, and some other stallions were hard at work. But now I don't need a pavilion, since Mayor Mare... I can turn it into a place for Lady Aendyr to stay! Brilliant!
Especially with all this rain we've been having lately. I hope it will end before the party. I should consult with Dash.
But first, time to go see Twilight!
****************
"Perhaps you meant 'bassoon'?" Lyra asked; Twilight had called her in, since Twilight hadn't read anything on musical styles in over a year.
"Would I hire an entire band of them?" I asked, frowning.
"Buffoon... Maroon... Mandolin? I really have no idea," Lyra said. "You must have been distracted and written the wrong thing."
"Are you getting enough sleep?" Twilight asked, worried.
"I am fine," I said firmly. "I merely have many responsibilities to... why are you looking at me like that?"
Twilight and Lyra were looking at each other in a way which said to me 'suspicion confirmed'.
"Hey, Twiley, how's it going?" a voice said. Was that West Wind? But he doesn't sound like that.
"BROTHER!" Twilight said and bounced off to him.
"Ahh, the mysteriously missing from Canterlot Shining Armor," I said. Twilight had wanted us to meet him during our recent Canterlot trip... trips. But he had been gone on a mission.
And now he was back. They nuzzled each other happily and then Twilight said, "Brother, this is Rarity and you know Lyra. Rarity, this is my brother, the Captain of the Guard, Shining Armor."
He bowed to me. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Rarity. Twilight gushes about you all during her letters, but she didn't make your beauty half as clear to the eye as it is." He turned to Lyra. "Good to see ya, Greensleeves."
Then he and Lyra launched into song together.
o/~ Alas, my love, you do me wrong,
o/~ To cast me off discourteously.
o/~ For I have loved you well and long,
o/~ Delighting in your company.
I stared, wondering if I was imagining things; why was he singing a love song to Lyra when she has a marefriend?
Twilight, however, was laughing and I concluded something mysterious was going on.
o/~ Greensleeves was all my joy
o/~ Greensleeves was my delight,
o/~ Greensleeves was my heart of gold,
o/~ And who but my lady greensleeves.
The song went on and now Twilight sang with them to my surprise. I listened, not familiar with the song.
"Now I wish you had your unit, so they could sing backup and dance in a line behind us," Lyra said mournfully, when they finished.
Shining Armor laughed loudly. "Anyway, where's Spike? I gotta see my main man!"
"I'm here!" Spike said, surprising me; he came charging right at Shining Armor, who charged him and they crashed into each other and fell down laughing.
Stallions are so strange sometimes.
"I have something for you," he told Spike and dug out a small onyx statue of a dragon. "He's an amethyst dragon and don't ask me why he's not made of amethyst or at least something purple and green. But Cadence saw it in a shop and thought of you."
"She's so sweet," Spike said, smiling.
I felt I should say something.
I felt I should vanish, never to be seen again.
Twilight suddenly sidled over to me and BAMF, we were up in her bedroom... bed platform... I would be nervous sleeping next to a drop but I guess she's used to towers.
Owliscious turned and studied me silently.
"I don't know if this is the right thing but I know... probably best you and Spike avoid each other a while, right?" Twilight said weakly.
"Yes," I told her.
"I will happily help you with the party, but I'd better check on my brother, as he wouldn't come here for nothing," Twilight said.
o/~ Love is a plunging gold dragon
o/~ That falls down into your wagon
Lyra and Shining Armor were singing again and it made even less sense. Also, I felt a little dizzy, so I decided to flop down on Twilight's bed. "Okay, I will nap," I told her.
But nothing can sleep through two powerful singers.
"What brings you here, brother?" Twilight asked.
"Cadence heard there was going to be a giant festival here in Ponyville and sent me to help out, since she is busy doing research and can't come herself. I... well, I don't know how much help I can be, but I'm glad to have a chance to actually spend some nice quiet time with you for once."
"I wish I'd known about this in advance; I could have tried to get my musical finished so we could perform it," Lyra said mournfully, ceasing to sing.
I'm sure Lady Aendyr would enjoy a musical but the time is growing short, and I am lying on a bed, hiding from Spike for no good reason.
Beyond not wanting to break his good mood.
"I'm telling you, the Dragon's March would be a perfect topic!" Spike said to Lyra.
"Hmm, maybe if I got enough singing pegasi... they could actually fly easily..." Lyra mused.
"Twiley, you know the hallucinatory terrain spell, right? Wouldn't that be perfect for setting up a stage?" Shining Armor said.
"Oh, yes, that's in Bingo's Book of Spells Volume 3," Twilight said. "I don't know it by heart but I know where to find it. Anyway, you should talk to my friend who is in charge, though I am helping her. Lyra, entertain Spike!"
I felt a pulse of magic and Shining Armor appeared with Twilight, while Lyra and Spike... it sounded like a song and dance routine.
I made myself sit up and be presentable. "I am glad to see you, Shining Armor. I can use all the help I can get."
"I am at your service," he said, bowing to me. What a gentlestallion. "I am not the organizer Twilight is, but I am pretty good at it."
"And better than Cadence," Twilight said mournfully. "Remember my eighth birthday party?"
"I had to bathe for three days to get the smell out," Shining Armor said, rubbing his forehead. "Anyway, all I know is that it's some sort of holiday or royal visit or something and I am supposed to help and to make sure Spike isn't setting himself on fire."
I glanced downstairs and laughed nervously. "He wouldn't burn," I said.
"Yeah, I know. He was a really great Fire Elemental for Nightmare Night that time. Twilight's Water Elemental costume started out great," Shining Armor said. "Until it got wet."
I laughed at that and he smiled and Twilight buried her face in her hooves.
"Okay, let's get down to it," Shining Armor said. "I'm sure the three of us will throw the greatest festival EVER!"
It has to be! With two assistants, I can do three times as much work and *make this work*.
Other than I still don't know what to do for Fluvia, which frustrates me. She was *recommended* to me. I have to help her.
Maybe I could make a dress and just put whales *on* it.
It wouldn't be elegant but it might, at least, be cute.
Worth trying. If I have time.
****************
"Marcus, darling, don't look at the gemstones like you might eat them," I said chidingly as I took measurements for a proper outfit for him for the ball. Which needs a better name... a name at all.
Maybe call it the Wind Ball, since the Aendyrs are air elementalists. I could get some Pegasi to make a nice breeze... Yes!
"I will eventually get used to you having so many and using them so casually but not today," he mumbled.
"It's okay, I am glad you like gems too," I told him. "Hmm, these onyx should go well here..."
We played seamstress and clothes horse for a while as I tried to focus on this and not endlessly worry about the parties and the dance and everything. With Twilight and Shining Armor on the job, I have more time but I worry.
"Shining Armor?" Marcus said with the tone I know means he's about to run for the hills.
"Relax. I am sure that being Celestia's agent means he will not try to smite you for... whatever it is," I told him. He's been a lot calmer these last few weeks, and I am glad, so I do not want him to spend Lady Aendyr and Princess Luna's visit freaking out over Twilight's brother.
Who seems far too gentlemanly to cause Marcus trouble.
I love Marcus but I do wish he would panic less.
"OWW."
"Sorry, dear, but if you twitch while I have pins around you, even my skills can't save you," I told him, though now I felt bad he'd gotten jabbed. "Stay still."
"I had totally forgotten he was out there with reason to kick my ass until now," Marcus said; I could see tiny vibrations as he held himself back.
"Just calm down. It's going to be fine. He is a gentlestallion, not a mad killer." I told her. "And he'll be joining us for dinner with Twilight."
His breath sped up and I could smell his fear, but it did not touch me, for I knew his fear unjustified. Tiny tendrils of doubt uncurled in my mind but I pushed them aside.
It would be fine.
*******************
"Otiluke's Resillient Sphere! I can never get it to work right," Twilight said mournfully as my coltfriend rolled down the street inside it; he was yelling but you couldn't hear anything. He was encased inside a roughly six foot diameter sphere of shining purple force and rolling along at a good clip, tumbling inside it.
"Well, any kind of defensive magic *is* my forte," Shining Armor said proudly.
"Marcus!" Sweetie galloped after him, trying to catch up with it.
I frowned. "You just attacked Marcus for no reason after Twilight told you *not to*." I was sorely disappointed.
"*Now* we're even," Shining Armor said, frowning at the swiftly retreating Marcus, who I would have been chasing but there was nothing I could do to help him, to my frustration.
"He didn't do anything to you and it's between him and Twilight," I said irritably. "Twilight, please save Marcus." It galled me that I had to ask. "I guess you don't take the duties of a guest very seriously, Shining Armor. I am *very* disappointed in you."
Twilight reached out with her power and stopped the sphere, bringing it and Sweetie back. I'm glad I am not closer to the bazaar or anything. "Brother, it was pretty mean to do that."
"I didn't do it to be mean, he has to know he can't mess with my sister," Shining Armor protested.
"I already handled it!" Twilight protested.
This may well end up the worst dinner I have ever hosted.
****************
Sweetie looked like warmed over death; she hates when friends and family fight. So she silently ate her Prancian Onion Soup Gratinee, which was excellent if I say so myself. It's one of my specialties, using four kinds of cheese and the finest red wine. The crust formed perfectly and I was very pleased, but Marcus and Shining Armor had flanked Twilight and each was trying to pretend the other didn't exist, while Twilight looked ready to die.
"I made a duck in school today," Sweetie said weakly.
"A ceramic duck?" Marcus asked curiously.
Sweetie nodded hesitantly.
"I remember the time Twiley was supposed to make pots to bring home and she was still researching pot types the night before and then we had to go get mud from down at the river and those frogs got *all over* her," Shining Armor said, then laughed. "We were bathing forever after that."
Twilight laughed. "I was so scared."
"Of frogs?" Sweetie said, surprised.
"I'd never seen one for real and I was little," Twilight said. "I mistook them for bullywugs. And I was afraid I was going to blow everything and totally panicked over that."
"You'd already packed your bags for being exiled to the Moon, yes," Shining Armor said. "Mom unpacked them, you know."
"I know, I was being a silly little kid, scared of everything," Twilight said, shaking her head. "Rarity, this is wonderful soup."
"Thank you, darling. I learned a lot of Prancian cuisine when I was Sweetie's age and I still eat it frequently." Part of my desire to rise in society; Prance leads the way in fashion and food. I guess I am a countess now but I don't feel like a countess.
Which is why it's so important this all go smoothly and...
"You never had to be scared of anything with me there," Shining Armor said proudly.
"But then you were gone and she had to face beholders and dragons and angry Immortals without you," Marcus said, then stuffed his face with soup.
Sweetie choked on her soup and I wanted to choke on mine. "Enough," I said sharply. "No sniping."
Shining Armor opened his mouth and I made a zipping gesture and he frowned and ate more soup.
'He's not normally like this,' Twilight told me, frowning as she ate, using magic for covert communication. 'I'll talk to him later.'
At least Twilight is being sane and rational, other than when she freaked out because she'd been dictating to Spike for twenty minutes and he hadn't been there because he was hiding from me.
And I still don't know what a 'mangoon' band is and I cannot remember talking to any such thing. Lyra is assembling a crack team of musicians for us, bless her.
'And I will talk to Marcus,' I told Twilight.
**********************
"He started it," Marcus said sullenly, sitting on the bed.
I paced in front of it. "You shouldn't respond in kind. He went far too far, and I am sorry for that, but you are a teacher and have to be better than that. We both do. We are nobles." In theory. "And must act as such with grace and dignity."
And eat handmade soup and...
Do not be vain, I told myself. True nobility is of the heart.
"You always act with grace and dignity as a lady should, which I admire," he said warmly and I couldn't help but smile, but I made myself frown.
No buttering his way out of this.
"I need you to promise no sniping at him or at Lord Darien Aendyr. I want this to be a wonderful festival." I told him sternly.
"You really didn't need to turn it into a giant production just for Helga and Darien and Samantha," Marcus said. "I think she was just expecting a quiet dinner with us, maybe a tour."
"I can't ask a real Lady to eat out of a plain bowl in my kitchen because I don't even have a dining room," I said frantically. "Princess Luna is coming! And Countess Cadence and only Father Time knows who else. Princess Celestia may decide to come with Big Mac and... mattresses! I bought bed frames for them but no mattresses!" I said in sudden horror.
"Check with Twilight; she probably took care of that," Marcus said, then sighed. "I met Helga in a bar brawl as she beat down this idiot from Ylarum with a bench. Then he hit me in the face with the Nahmeh. I used to have a little cheek scar from it when I was Cufen." He touched his cheek and his eyes looked distant.
"I just want to feel like a lady too," I said, flopping down on the bed beside him, so tired from the day.
"You are always a lady to me," he said firmly and I smiled a little. He rose and went to the jar on the shelf near the bed and plucked one of the shifting candies, ate it, and became a stallion, then came over and awkwardly embraced me. I have only in recent weeks come to understand how awkward some things we do are compared to how humans do it. But there are things where we are more graceful. Or at the least, better. Running as a pony feels so much more natural than doing it as a human even with the candy giving me human instincts.
"You didn't have to," I said softly.
"I did," he said and held me and I felt a little better.
But hugs cannot solve every problem.
Or Pinkie would rule Mystara, or at least fix all its problems.
"I did ask Pinkie to make cakes, right?" I said, tensing to run to Sugar Cube Corner if I had to.
"Yes," Marcus said. "You did."
"Can I come in?" Sweetie asked, knocking on the door, probably with her head from the sound of it.
"Knock with a hoof!" I told her.
"It's fine," Marcus said.
Sweetie came in and smiled. "Hi, big brother, big sister," she said warmly, then nuzzled both of us. "My card reading says the ball will be a grand success!"
"Do you have someone to go with?" I asked her. "Your dress! I have to make you a dress!"
"But we..."
"Honey, I think..."
I have to do it *right now* before I forget. And she needs someone to go with. And where am I going to get enough lilies at this time of the year?
So much to do!
****************
"I'm twice her age," Caramel said to me. "And I have a fillyfriend, anyway."
I facehoofed. He is. I don't know anyone Sweetie's age really, who isn't part of her gang. All the stallions I know are too old and I don't know how I even forgot this.
But if I wait for Sweetie to do it, it may not get done or she'll blow him up with an ill-advised attempt to... well, that's more Apple Bloom's thing now.
So I took the candied apples back home and contemplated how to ensure a proper escort for my sister, among a million other things I have to do.
Twilight galloped past me with Spike on her back trying to hang on and didn't even notice me as she shouted about crepe paper.
If we've run out now, we're in trouble.
But she's actually headed into the sofa and quill store.
The sound of Twilight ramming into comfy cushions ensued and I hesitantly came in. "Dear, what's this?"
"We need one more ream of crepe paper to finish the Elemental Plane of Air theme for the ball and everyone is *out*," Twilight said frantically, hoofs flailing about.
"Because you wasted an entire ream trying to get the clouds to look right when you could have gotten *real* clouds from Rainbow Dash," Spike said, still clinging to her as she wobbled about and poor Mr. Davenport looked at her crossly.
"I can't put real clouds inside a building," Twilight protested.
Trumpets blared outside. "All hail the most fashionable Pegasus in Equestria!" a voice cried out.
"Don't blare a horn in the town market!" Daisy shouted angrily. "I'm trying to sell flowers here!"
It could be Clarity or perhaps Dash's mother. Either would be a huge boon to me.
Distantly, I heard Pinkie sing-songing. "Look, up in the sky! It's an Aendyr riding a pie!"
I bolted into the street, horrified that Pinkie had thrown a pie at Lady Aendyr, but I couldn't see Pinkie anywhere. Rather it was Rainbow Dash Senior and... was that Dash? In a fancy dress with her hair done up nicely? No, her hair... was that Crash???
In fact, Clarity and Spikey were on the other side of them, while a half-dozen unicorn stallions in matching blue and gold outfits surrounded them, clearing a path for them. They had a shield of flying umbrellas keeping the rain off them; it was pouring down *again*; the scheduled rain should end before the festival, but... I worry. "Rarity, darling," Clarity purred.
"Hey, Rarity," Spikey said cheerfully; he wore a nice tuxedo and wasn't in despair, but he reminded me of Spike. Sigh.
"Crash wrote me about your party, and I had to come help," Rainbow Dash Sr. said with that voice of hers. So rich. So elegant. Oh yes.
Thank Celestia!
"I don't suppose you have a ream of crepe paper by any chance," I said hesitantly.
"What color?" she asked curiously. "I can have my dear daughter whip you up some real clouds though, if that's what it's for."
How did she KNOW?
"I'd demonstrate but the sky's full," Crash said, looking up.
"Oh, I trust your skills," I told her, remembering that horrible winter storm inside White Plume Mountain. If she can pull it off... oh yes!
Twilight now came out and said hello to everyone and Spike stared at Spikey, who waved cheerfully, then he fled back into the store. I sighed. I can't worry about Spike right now when I have eight other apocalypses to worry about.
"On *three*," I heard Pinkie distantly say.
Possibly nine.
*******************
"She wants to dress like an *orc*?" Crash said in shock back at my place.
"Orca, dear," Rainbow Dash Sr. said. "A kind of whale."
"It may be the greatest challenge I have *ever* faced," I told her, then poured her more tea. Twilight was off dealing with Spike, while Spikey, Clarity, Crash, and Rainbow Dash Sr. joined me in a little tea party with cakes and my fine china; I had thrown it together hastily but I felt it was coming off quite well.
It was nice and relaxing and I needed to relax.
"Can't you just make a black dress with white trim?" Crash asked hesitantly, then spilled tea on herself and looked frustrated.
Rainbow Dash Sr. gestured to one of her attendants and I wondered if she normally travelled with so many unicorns. It did strike a rather impressive note. I could never afford it. The attendant began a spell which sucked out the tea and I studied it as this could be *very* useful until Sweetie and her friends finally grow up enough to eat more delicately.
"She already has one and clearly expects something which says 'Orca' and not just 'formalwear'," I told Crash. "But thank you for the suggestion." Manners are important.
"Perhaps formalwear with some embroidered orcas," Clarity mused. "Put with other sealife for a sea theme?"
We began trading ideas while Spikey stuffed his face and I gradually relaxed. Surely with this many good minds we will find a solution!
*****************
I stirred as Marcus threw a blanket over me; I now realized we'd worked ourselves to the point of collapse, trying to get various outfits ready in time. I tried to decide if the prepared clothing was real or just a wishful dream as my eyes wobbled. Only now did I realize I had nowhere for my guests to stay. Where would I ever put all those unicorns??? I do have the pavilion, but is it big enough for this many?
I certainly can't make them all sleep on the floor.
I tried to rise and Marcus said softly, "I can carry you to bed."
"Can't leave... guests on the floor..." I mumbled, yawning.
"I suppose not," he said. "Maybe Fluttershy has space."
I hated to impose, but once I woke them up, some of the problem resolved itself, as Rainbow Dash, Sr. had arranged hotel space for herself and her followers. Marcus and I let Clarity and Spikey have my room and we just curled up on some blankets in my workroom.
He didn't want to, but I insisted. I am a good hostess.
Even if it meant dreaming of wallowing in mud in the Malpheggi and waking up wrapped in one of my rolls of cloth.
*********************
I had almost everything ready. Except the dress for Fluvia, though we had some prototypes. But the day had come and the festival was ready... maybe... and I was ready and everyone was dressed up even if Sweetie somehow put her dress on *backwards* the first time.
Spikey and Spike had run off together to do *something* the last few days. No one was sure of what, but they were hidden in Fluttershy's backyard, working on some sort of project. A Dragon Thing was all they would say.
I drank just a small amount of wine to steady myself. I can't afford to get drunk but my nerves were jangling. I tried to work on projects but I couldn't focus. I could hear Marcus in the kitchen, doing grading and being *too calm*. Normally, I am calm and he panics and this felt unnatural.
I admit, Marcus has been a rock through this but he doesn't even seem excited by it! How can he be so calm?
"Calm down, it's going to be fine!" Dinky shouted in the distance.
I could hear hoofbeats; someone was galloping towards the Carousel. Probably Twilight, as Ditzy would fly and Dinky's been assisting Twilight while the Spikes are doing... something...
Twilight galloped in. "I can't find Pinkie ANYWHERE," she said frantically. "We have to set up the welcome food and the Cakes don't know where she is. I have... had the food... where is the FOOD?"
Dinky ran in the door, tripped on the doorframe, and fell down. "Slow down," she mumbled. "You left the wagon in front of Sugarcube Corner. You teleported out of the hitch."
"Hey, Twilight, I hope I'm not too late!" someone said from the doorway, a pink pony... not Pinkie... given she was a unicorn... with a multi-colored mane. "I'm supposed to meet Spike and help him with something but I can't find him!" She wore a silver tiara set with a very finely cut emerald.
"He and Spikey are at Fluttershy's," Twilight said. After a second. "Which you have never seen." Frantic direction giving ensued while I wondered if Twilight was going to introduce her friend or not.
Dinky said, "You're Countess Cadence, right?"
"That I am!" Cadence said cheerfully. "You must be Dinky."
Dinky looked surprised, then strutted over, looking more confident. "Nice to meet you." They shook hooves.
"Oh, Rarity, this is my old tutor and friend, Countess Cadence," Twilight said cheerfully. "Cadence, this is my friend Rarity, who organized this festival. Shining Armor should be down at the town hall," she told Cadence.
A huge breeze blew in through the front door, starting to build in power. Dinky tumbled across the room into one of my mannequins, which fell on her and the rest of us, our hair blew about wildly. The wind grew stronger and now Twilight stumbled and fell on Cadence and I felt myself pushed towards the wall as everything in my shop began to fly everywhere.
"There's powerful magic at work, very powerful!" Twilight said as she and Cadence tumbled and ended up buried in mannequins, half-finished dresses, finished dresses, thread and cloth. They burst out of it, while I just got buried and Dinky vanished completely under yet more of my things.
Distantly I heard Pinkie shouting about presents.
PINKIE! She must have tried to wrap the North Wind in a box to give to Lady Aendyr or something!
Now I felt jealous I hadn't thought of that, but jealousy is unbefitting a true lady so I let the wind blow it away and... my hair is going to be a disaster!
"Rarity!" Marcus said, opening the door from the kitchen, then blowing away across the kitchen. I heard a crash and the sound of pots and pans falling out of the upper cupboards on him.
o/~ And the bow comes last / 'cause my wrapping is always fast o/~ I heard Pinkie chanting distantly, carried in by the wind.
What?
And then the winds drew in on themselves, spinning faster but more densely and formed into four people. There was a very tall and muscular blonde woman with long hair tied into a braid and pulled up into a bun, wearing... a really terrible white dress that was essentially a sack with sleeves, which sort of gathered under her breasts but basically had no decoration beyond the green thread of the gather and along the end of the sleeves and at the bottom. There was a shorter, but not short man with black hair cut very short, piercing blue eyes and a very strong nose and jawline, wearing a loose white jacket with black trim over a white robe even more shapeless than the woman's, though his was more translucent with the degree of translucence ebbing and flowing around it, creating an effect of roiling clouds. Next to him stood a young human filly... I was not sure of her age; I have not met many child humans. She wore a shapeless dress like her mother's, though I noticed the green was the color of the coat of the white-maned filly unicorn who stood next to her; the unicorn was dappled in white, wearing a dress rather like the other two women, and she was clearly substantially younger than Sweetie and her friends. I recognized them as Lady Aendyr, Lord Aendyr, their daughter Samantha and her friend Sugar Sparkle.
Lady Aendyr held a staff of rough oak and looked at the mess in horror and embarrassment, while Samantha now said, "I didn't do it!"
"Wow, Mom would spank me forever," Sugar Sparkle said.
"Hey, Helga, Darien, Samantha," Marcus said from the kitchen, then moaned; there was a crashing sound, of someone trying to stand among pots and tripping on them.
All I could think about as I rose was that I now understood why Lady Aendyr wished me to make her family better clothing. This is fashion in Blackhill??? I was covered with loose threads, a long piece of cloth was impaled on my horn, hanging down over the right side of my face, I had completely forgotten to put on my first festival dress, inks were spattered across my left side and I had my right front hoof stuck inside the skull of one of my mannequins.
But all I could do was mourn for Blackhill's clothing fashions.
Until I realized how I looked and then I fled howling in a panic to my room, right past Marcus, who fell among the pots a third time. I'm sorry, dear, I'll make it up to you; that one was my fault.
"Welcome to Ponyville!" I heard Twilight say and then she teleported into my room. "Rarity, are you okay?"
"I could not have possibly made a worse first impression if I covered myself in tree sap and tiny statues of orcas!" I wailed, flopping down on the bed. Twilight pulled the 'skull' off my foot, for which I will be eternally grateful.
"Welcome to Equestria, I am Countess Cadence," I heard Cadence say. "Why don't you come into the kitchen and we'll get you something to drink and eat; you must be exhausted from that."
"I can cast magic longer than anyone else in the family, if not as strongly," I heard Lady Aendyr said proudly. "Samantha, Countess Rarity's supplies are not toys. No, Sugar Sparkle, don't try and build a mountain out of the rolls of cloth!" Her voice grew ever more frantic. "That unicorn is not a toy! DARIEN!!!!"
Surely Darien is not using a unicorn as a toy.
I felt powerful magic in the kitchen or maybe my workshop... I don't know. I couldn't think. At all.
What a total disaster, and this is just *hello*.
"Samantha, I told you not to bring your golems!" Darien shouted; more magic.
Carousel Boutique is going to burn; Ponyville will be destroyed and everyone will shun me forever!
"Rarity, breathe!" Twilight said urgently, shaking me.
"Rarity, I'm coming," Marcus said.
"Help entertain my guests!" I shouted to him. I just want to die of shame in peace.
o/~ Your timepiece ain't lagging / you're just seeing an awesome dragon o/~
That doesn't even rhyme properly, Pinkie. Perhaps o/~ your clock didn't fall off the wagon o/~, though I fail to see what timepieces being slow has to do with a dragon.
Admittedly, watches can't drink either.
I wanted a drink.
"Windy, no! Down! Bad elemental, bad!" I heard Lady Aendyr shout.
"Fine Unicorn ladies do not use their horn as a pogo stick," I heard Candace say with something approaching sternness. From a great distance. ...
"Rarity, BREATHE," Twilight said, poking my gut so I had to breathe.
This set me to hyperventilating instead.
"It's ready! It wasn't easy!" Apple Bloom said from the workshop. "Uncle K was a big help, though!" ...
Twilight's eyes widened. "What?" Now she began shouting at Spike to take notes and began trying to draw a map of White Plume Mountain on my wall for some reason. I am not even sure... it had to be magic but all I could see was the world spinning and at the center, Marjorie and Keraptis were laughing at me and eating tasty cakes like the ones SITTING IN A WAGON IN FRONT OF SUGARCUBE CORNER, GETTING STALE.
"Children, calm down! Why are there dolls on the ceiling?" I heard Princess Luna shouting.
"Holy shit," Ivan said.
o/~ Groove to my steps / Bigger than the Great Cow of the Atlan Tepes! o/~
This is the end. I am going to die with Pinkie's voice echoing in my ears.
No, wait, I think that was Spike.
"I knew the cow was real!" Dinky shouted triumphantly.
At least someone is happy.
"SPIKE!" Twilight shouted and vanished.
Better I die alone, really.
"Marcus, this is all your fault!" I heard Lord Aendyr shout.
At least... if he and Spike and Shining Armor team up, I may have to move to Prance forever.
And ever.
I may have to move after this anyway.
The door opened. Dash ran in and slid under my bed. "If anyone asks, Celestia asked me to take a message to the South Pole for her!" ...
"Don't hide from your mother, dear," I said wearily. "You may wish to get to a safe distance before I explode of frustration."
"She's brainwashed my sister and now she's after me," Dash said.
The sound of the death of all my hopes echoed through my home from the workshop.
"Uh... Rarity... what's going on?" Dash asked.
"We're all going to die," I pronounced. Of shame.
Dash somehow curled around one end of my bed, half of her under it, but her forelegs and head sticking up over the side. "Rarity, is there a riot in the workshop?"
"Yes," I said mournfully.
"SWEET!" She rushed out of the room and I rose, chasing her. I do not need Dash adding to chaos!
Marcus and Lord Aendyr had Sugar Sparkle and Samantha slung over their shoulders respectively, while Cadence made tea in the kitchen and Dinky and Lady Aendyr were trying to clean up the workshop but clearly didn't know where *anything* went.
And where is Sweetie Belle? I don't see Apple Bloom anywhere or...
"Dammit, the riot is over," Dash said and slumped.
My workshop was a disaster. And I still have to... if my outfits for them are destroyed, I may have to move to the Moon.
Twilight can banish me, I'm sure.
At this point, Sweetie yelled from her room, "Dinky, we need you!" and Dinky ran off to join her... okay, she's in her room. One less worry.
"I can't wear this thing!" I heard Scootaloo shout.
"You'll wear it and LIKE IT," Apple Bloom insisted.
Did I make them outfits? Did *someone* make them outfits?
Is this what Spike and Spikey have been doing?
Where is Clarity? Did she leave for something? I can't remember her assigned job, I can't remember when the dance starts... I had a list but... it was now in bits around my workshop; Countess Cadence had been kind enough to sweep it up into a small, tattered pile shaped like a heart.
It strangely matched her cutie mark, in fact. Except for not being made of crystal.
Instead, it was made of failure.
There are gems embedded in the walls... well, with a better arrangement, it might actually fit well. It would match my cutie mark.
"I'm a big pony, I can stand on my own hooves!" Sugar Sparkle protested.
I am naked around humans and they're all going to get the wrong idea and people are *looking at me*! I fled in a panic, clambered into my closet and pulled down half my clothing on top of me.
I can just lie here until I die, which will be soon, I think.
"Rar... Rarity?" I heard Marcus shout.
"Rarity, come back here!" Dash said; I could hear her coming. "Your guests are here and... aargh, I'm infected with manners!"
I heard a noise which might have been Dash shoving her head into running water for some reason.
I began trying to decide which of the dresses now lying on top of me would go best with my funeral. I'm thinking the red one, though black is traditional but my black dresses are a little too intended to show my beauty, which is not the idea at a funeral.
Even mine.
"Honey, it's okay, no one is angry and the tea will get cold," Marcus now said to me from the doorway. "I can help you put on the blue dress."
"Sky blue or royal blue?" I asked weakly. He remembered! I did a little fashion show yesterday.
"Royal blue so you don't look too much like Dash or Mama Dash," he said, then began picking up dresses. "Helga is really embarrassed, so please be kind to her; she feels terrible she wrecked your workshop."
She's such a great wizard and I just run this store, I thought. Even though I am a *unicorn*, born to magic.
I found the royal blue dress and he began helping me into it; I could do it all with magic, but it feels better if someone helps me. I could feel my nerves ceasing to jangle, or at least playing pianissimo.
It was like putting on armor for battle. Marcus patiently buckled and tied everything into place, then carefully brushed my hair until my hairstyle reasserted itself... how did all that glitter even get into my hair? I had a horrible flashback to the day I foolishly gave Sweetie a Glitterator as a present.
I let out a great sigh. I can face the world, maybe.
Everyone was in the kitchen, though I noticed that Lady Aendyr was standing by the table instead of sitting, a hand on her daughter's shoulder as the daughter sat at the table, eating a chocolate chip cookie.
Because all the snacks are sitting in a wagon in front of Sugarcube Corner while Twilight is off freaking out.
Not that I have any room to complain.
The tea smelled wonderful and Cadence poured two more glasses; she had been talking about her recent visit to Aalban in Glantri with Lord and Lady Aendyr. "Yes, my cousin is married to Prince Jagger," Lord Aendyr said to Cadence. I now felt even *smaller* and more backwoods than before.
"Helga, this is Rarity," Marcus now said. "Rarity, this is my old friend Helga, her husband Darien, her daughter Samantha and Samantha's friend Sugar Sparkle." He studied Cadence. "I'm not sure who you are, but I am Samus Marcus of Thyatis, educator and Special Agent of Queen Celestia."
"I am Countess Cadence, an old friend of Twilight's and also a Special Agent of the Crown of Equestria! A pleasure to meet you!" she said cheerfully and passed Marcus a glass by magic. "Enjoy!"
He began sipping from it while I fretted because sitting in my kitchen and eating whatever I have lying around was NOT how this was supposed to go at all.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," Lady Aendyr said warmly despite this being a total disaster of a first meeting. She will likely have nightmares of how I looked when I rose out of the mess. "I enjoy our letters, but face-to-face is always better."
"I keep saying we should get a crystal ball," Lord Aendyr said to her. Then he looked at Marcus as if Marcus had eaten the crystal ball he planned to buy. Marcus was too busy grabbing a cookie to notice. Where are the SNACKS? If we all fill up on cookies, they will be *wasted*.
"It's a pleasure to meet you. We shouldn't load up on cookies; Twilight is bringing snacks to last us until dinner and the dance tonight." If she ever makes it back. "There will be food there." In theory.
"There's a dance?" Lady Aendyr asked, looking at her sack-dress.
"Oh, yes, I need to get you all to try on the clothing I made you so that I can make any corrections," I told them. I had nearly forgotten and where is Twilight?
"Clothing?" Lord Aendyr asked in surprise.
It now hit me I had totally forgotten to send the schedule of festivities to the Aendyrs! They must have no idea of everything planned.
"Were you planning to run naked and free, Darien? Like after the green slime incident?" Marcus asked, snickering.
Marcus, I do not need you provoking him!
Lord Aendyr's eyes narrowed and Lady Aendyr very loudly said, "Rarity kindly volunteered to make us some nice outfits, so let's go try them on!"
I was busy making adjustments when Sweetie and company *finally* resurfaced. Clarity led them in, wearing a tan and brown wraparound, her bow out and quiver slung over her back, wearing a sturdy fur cap with a spike on top and something... had I seen this outfit somewhere? She had leather pants and I should know this...
Sweetie wore a fancy green and pink dress with her cutie mark worked into it in a black and white outline in various ways, all lace and satin and probably causing her to overheat if she moves much but it was quite lovely. Apple Bloom wore this marvelous conical white hat with two curved wings on the side and a navy blue dress embroidered with white flowers, with wooden clogs on her hooves, which she used to do a little dance as she came in. Dinky wore this huge fur hat which projected high above her head like a kind of mountain outcropping, a white blouse with a black jacket over it with gold buttons and a plaid skirt in red and black. She had bagpipes for some reason. Twist wore a sea green toga in the Thyatian style with a wreath in her hair and a bag of candies slung by her forehip on the left side. Finally, Scootaloo was sharply dressed in a white military style suit with a sword buckled on and... a monocle?
Then it hit me. Each of the outfits is based on a different region of Glantri, where Lord and Lady Aendyr and their daughter live!
I should have thought of that!
"Presenting part of my new line, they all were kind enough to model for me," Clarity purred, then showed off each of the outfits while I worked on finishing the adjustments to the outfits I did for the Aendyrs.
Only now did I realize I had put Cadence.. a Countess... to work helping me out. I realized this when she dropped everything and said, "You are all so CUTE!"
"I am *badass*," Scootaloo said irritably but Twist and Sweetie smiled brightly.
Dinky said, "Oh, hey, it's YOU!"
"It's me!" Cadence said proudly. A second passed and she said, "I don't remember meeting you but it's nice to meet you!"
Dinky laughed nervously but then curtseyed as did the others. "Thanks a lot, Clarity."
"My dear little sister asked me to help and our interests dovetailed perfectly," Clarity said, basking in the praise. "Everyone who is everyone will see my line in action tonight!"
I wondered... is her outfit part of the line? It's rather martial.
Though well made, of course, as I would expect of my sister.
"When you say everyone..." Lady Aendyr began.
"Princess Celestia and Luna will be attending the ball with many other luminaries. And then there is *so* much else. We have to get your outfits ready so we have time to tour the town before dinner." Did I actually buy the food for dinner? I did get meat... Where is Ivan?
"When's Ivan coming in?" Lady Aendyr now asked as Cadence checked over Lord Aendyr's outfit.
There was a sudden whoosh of shadows boiling out of the corners which formed up into Ivan and Princess Luna, though both were dressed as Belcadizians and looked like Belcadizians as well. I was surprised Luna was in disguise and Ivan too. But it was a *grand* entrance.
"Carlotta, is that you?" Lady Aendyr asked in clear surprise.
"It's Ivan in disguise and not Dona Carlotta," Lord Aendyr said. He eyed Ivan suspiciously.
"I am Princess Luna, but I do not wish to be recognized yet," Lunette said. "I will assume my normal form when it is time for the ball." It would be a better disguise if she wasn't wearing a broach which resembled her cutie mark, mind you.
But then, so is Ivan and no one would think him Princess Luna.
Except Pinkie if she thought it funny.
"Uncle Ivan!" Samantha said, running over and hugging him; she now trailed threads back to where I was, which I began to quickly fix. "I didn't know you were an elf!"
"I turn into all sorts of things," he told her, ruffling her hair and looking awkward; he glanced at Lord Aendyr, but Lord Aendyr just eyed him warily.
This is going to be *very* awkward.
Does Lord Aendyr hate every stallion in the world?
Surely he doesn't think they're after his wife. Though I am still not sure what humans consider attractive besides me as a human.
Which came out more vain than I intended.
"Sweetie, if you help me get everything done, we can go around town faster," I told her.
"I will help," Clarity said and we soon got down to business while Marcus and Lady Aendyr and Ivan talked and Princess Luna and Lord Aendyr discussed Glantrian politics.
Twilight arrived with the snacks just in time for me to both realize I had ordered far too many and for it to be time to go.
Life is like that and I...
"Lord Aendyr, Lady Aendyr, have you ever been to Kaarjala?" I asked.
"Isn't that north of Norwold and thus unfit for man or beast?" Lord Aendyr asked me; he looked quite good in the nice white suit I had made for him with grey clouds embroidered on it, though it meant he was closer to Scootaloo's outfit than I would have done normally. If anyone had *told* me about this.
"Didn't the Red Reaver come from Kaarjala?" Lady Aendyr asked Marcus.
"Yes," Marcus said, burying his face in his hands. "I had forgotten he ever existed until now."
"Being trampled by reindeer looked pretty bad," Ivan said, shaking his head.
"Don't remind me," Marcus said.
"They don't normally dress like whales, right?" I asked hesitantly.
"The Red Reaver wore mostly white and red and green, so not really," Lady Aendyr said, now looking very curious.
I suddenly realized Dash had vanished. Gone to hide from her mother, I guess.
We have some draft dresses, but I fear Fluvia won't find them to be enough like a whale.
Why did it have to be *whales*?
****************
The problem with a tour is that Ponyville doesn't have a lot of points of interest. However, when we reached the Library, Twilight and Lord Aendyr and Marcus got into a long argument about... things I have never heard of, I will confess. Clarity and Cadence had gone off with Sweetie's friends to do something... show off her line, I suppose. Lunette and Ivan began showing the kids around the children's section and I *finally* had a chance to talk to Lady Aendyr for five seconds without a disaster. Beyond worrying about Spike and Spikey.
"Hans Vanderhooven was *not* a myth," Twilight insisted. "His brother destroyed the records to try to cover up that he ever ruled Bergdhovern."
"He most certainly was a myth," Lord Aendyr insisted. "Made up by the rebels in the early 900s, to try to paint the current line as illegitimate."
"Gretel Vanderhooven was the real ruler, who had to pose as a man in order to establish her ability to rule at that time," Marcus said, waggling a finger at Lord Aendyr.
I tried to ignore the argument and was going to sit down at a table with Lady Aendyr, then realized there were *no chairs*. I could not ask a real lady to sit on the floor, so I just stood near the table awkwardly. "Sweetie and her friends are *supposed* to take care of your daughter and her friend, but they ran off with my twin sister... I have told you about Clarity, right?"
"As long as she's not a doppleganger-elf-troll," Lady Aendyr began hesitantly.
Marcus made a gurgling noise but the other two were too busy arguing to notice. I, of course, could not help but notice. 'Marcus, darling, gurgling is not done in polite company. Especially not in front of nobles.' This little spell is *so useful* especially when I have to correct Sweetie when she grazes in polite company.
'I'm sorry, my love,' he told me and returned to arguing. Something about forged art. Anyway...
"No, she is..." I never found out... let's hope Apple Bloom got material for the dresses or... Dresses made with material from Keraptis... Focus. "My dear sister, created by one of the Immortals. Hasn't Marcus told you about that adventure?"
"Marcus is not a great letter writer," she said and sighed. She glanced at her husband, then whispered, "We have to do something or they will chew on each other like dogs with a bone if the bone was another dog."
Marcus is normally a delight, but when he gets petty.... He can be so petty. I see her husband is the same way. Why are stallions so silly sometimes?
"I don't even understand what the problem is," I confessed. "Beyond typical stallion jealousies."
"He and Marcus... did the opposite of hitting it off from the start. Darien is very much... he charms me but not most people. He's quiet and bookish normally; his mother and I have to drag him into social things, really. He's kind of shy but I don't understand why." She smiled at him brightly. "Samantha is more like me."
She is most definitely a lively child. "He sounds like Twilight, who Marcus gets on with quite well." I laughed a little nervously in my head, wondering how much she knew about that.
"I don't know," Lady Aendyr said, then looked around and sighed. "I suppose Ponyville isn't big on chairs."
I know Twilight has some around... or benches or something! I began... ahaha! I flopped over, summoning my fainting couch, then got up and let her sit on it, while I curled up on one end. I felt quite brilliant.
"There is no town named Maastricht," Marcus insisted in the distance.
"Well, it's debated," Twilight said. "It may have been a giant Hallucinatory Terrain spell which somehow became temporarily permanent."
Temporarily permanent?
I now told her about my ongoing issues with Spike, which took a while. "So I don't know how to settle that either."
"I know Darien wants to meet him but I fear it's to plot revenge," Lady Aendyr said, sighing and twining a lock of her golden mane around one finger. Golden hair. For a human. "Oh, I have to tell Marcus... Carlotta finally eloped with her boyfriend; I hear that's part of why they went to Canterlot a while back. Princess Carnelia is enraged. I fear things may be ugly between Aalban and Belcadiz for a while." She paused. "Does Ivan go around a lot as a Belcadizian now?"
"Luna likes it," I told her softly, glancing around. "I am not sure of their relationship but they are close." I do not know Ivan as well as I should given he is my love's closest friend. Along with Lady Aendyr. Though he and Dash seem quite good friends now too.
I did my best to sit well and straighten up as Lady Aendyr leaned over close to me as we whispered. "She is an Immortal and her uncle is sponsoring Ivan."
"So it's true," Lady Aendyr said, looking distracted and glancing off towards the children's section.
"I can't read you {Fast Runner and the Giant Black Pudding}, it's too scary," I heard Lunette say.
"I like rice pudding with currants," Sugar Sparkle said. "And I like scary stories!"
"Me too!" Samantha said but her voice wobbled. "I'm brave like Mama!"
She didn't *sound* quite so brave.
Ivan made weird noises, then said, "I can be the Black Pudding."
That certainly won't make it into his future scriptures. "It's true," I told her. I didn't say anything about Twilight or us... it's a secret... but now I felt bad for not saying. But I wasn't sure if it would be okay. "And Marcus too. He did tell you right?"
She studied her staff, leaning against the couch. "Yes," she said softly. "It explains many things."
Now I was wondering what was wrong but not sure I could ask. "I am sure that Luna and Asterius and Celestia will guide them well," I told her.
She sighed. "I am sure they will." But now she fiddled with her staff. "I am so sorry about your workshop. I study very hard, but I have a hard time controlling my power. Darien has as a lot more fine control than me."
"I am like that with Twilight. She has power and I have focus. I'm sure she would be happy to help you," I told her. "And I as well."
"You are a true lady," she said, smiling, but then looking at the books and looking kind of guilty, almost.
"No, no, I do my best, but I am not a lady of refinement like yourself," I told her. Even if I don't like Blackhill fashions, all our interactions have shown me she behaves as a true lady should. And now I have her dressed to match her interior refinement. She lives the dream I always had.
Lord Aendyr may hate my coltfriend but he is no Blueblood and she is lucky in that.
Though now I understand even less how they get along so poorly. Twilight and Marcus get on very well, as long as they forget about their past.
"There is not one shred of solid evidence for the Maastricht Incident!" Marcus insisted.
"I agree with Twilight, it was at least temporarily real; there's independent confirmation in the Rhoona chronicles," Lord Aendyr said triumphantly. "I'll get them!" He began a spell.
"Those were in another country on the other side of the Steppes and prone to making things up!" Marcus protested.
Books began floating down to the arguing trio, but there was an odd bumping noise like some sort of scuffle in front of the library doors. "Hold on, I think we may need to break up a fight," I told Lady Aendyr. Since Twilight is busy with Lord Aendyr; I don't want to break up their discussion.
It turned out to be Lyra and Bon-Bon, both dressed up fancily, trying to push an equally dressed up Berry Punch through the door; she was hitched to a small cart full of bottles of drinks. "Oh, hello," Berry Punch said, then looked at Lady Aendyr and tried to curtsey and banged her face nearly into the ground.
Also, for some reason, Lyra was wearing a monocle. Are they in this season? She was dressed rather like Scootaloo, in fact... surely this isn't Scootaloo in disguise.
It is a *great* one if it is.
"Lady Aendyr, this is Berry Punch, who is supplying the drinks for tonight and some future events," I said. Then I introduced everyone to Lady Aendyr.
"I met your cousin-in-law, the Princess of Aalban recently," Bon-Bon said, studying Lady Aendyr with an odd look on her face. "It is nice to meet you."
Lady Aendyr had an odd look herself which then changed to a smile. "OH," she said. "Of course you are Lady Bon-Bon of Ponyville, a pleasure to meet you. I heard about what happened at Jagger's castle." She shook hand-to-hoof and I suddenly wondered what exactly had happened on Bon-Bon's trip to Glantri that she couldn't talk about.
She shook with Lyra as well and then said, "Thank you so much for helping Roderick. I tried, but I couldn't help him either."
Distantly, Ivan made horrible noises which shouldn't be made in public and the children squealed. They're just... what little kids like, I guess.
"Is that a giant black pudding?" Lyra said excitedly, suddenly producing a floating sword. "I know how to deal with those!"
"It's Ivan pretending for children," I said quickly, not wanting Twilight's library to be destroyed like that poor feeble dress Ditzy destroyed the other day.
"Lyra," Bon-Bon said, embarrassed.
Lyra laughed nervously and put the sword away.
"It only has 248 pages because someone ripped out the last 8," Marcus said very loudly.
"Burned, to be precise," Twilight replied quickly. "Which doesn't mean it HAS to have burned during the fire of 983, but it does seem likely."
Berry Punch laughed really loudly, then looked like she wanted to die and tried to just titter and failed. "Rarity, I thought you might want a final sample or something for your guests before I go... would you like to try something, Lady Aendyr?" she said hesitantly, like walking on verbal broken glass, trying to dodge it.
"I could go for a red wine but I don't have a glass," Lady Aendyr said, reaching for a bottle and stopping herself.
"Twilight has many fine glasses," I said. "Twilight, may I..."
FLASH, five glasses appeared in the air by us and then Twilight resumed arguing about book binding and glue types and their reaction to various kinds of flame.
Lady Aendyr's breath caught; she looked ruefully at Twilight, then carefully took a bottle and began slowly, delicately pouring wine for each of us. Lyra and I could hold ours with magic, but when she got to Berry Punch, she hesitated. "How do you drink?"
"Oh, I know the taste of my own vintages," Berry said modestly.
"I would feel bad drinking in front of you without offering you any," Lady Aendyr said firmly. Now that is manners.
"I will assist Berry if Bon-Bon will... if *Lyra* will assist Bon-Bon," I said. I could probably help everyone but I expect Lyra will want to help Bon-Bon.
Soon everyone was having some fine wine; it was *very* good, better than what she gave me to pay for her dress, in fact. Well, I paid well so I am glad she did not hold back. Berry drank very slowly, clearly unused to flying glasses, then looked expectantly at Lady Aendyr.
"Da..." Lady Aendyr began, then swallowed and seemed to stared off into space a few seconds. "A mix of blueberry and red grape, I think, though the aftertaste reminds me of cinnamon. Good... body..." Her voice seemed to go into slow motion; she swirled the glass as if studying it... well, clearly checking the sweetness, of course. To see if it tears quickly or slowly. "I rather like a crisp wine like this." She corked it. "Very good, thank you, Lady Berry Punch."
"I'm no Lady," Berry Punch mumbled, then smiled. "The cinnamon is the tricky part; just a tiny little bit or it becomes far too hot. The sweetness isn't too bad?"
"No, no, I like it," Lady Aendyr said, relaxing.
"Is it true dragons prefer more tannin in their wine?" Berry Punch asked.
"Yes," I told her. "However, they typically have to drink something with a very high alcohol level or it's basically just fruit juice to them. Sugar, on the other hand, hits them hard." As I learned, never give Spike an entire bag of candy.
Bon-Bon's eyes crossed, and I see she knows that too.
I now talked business quickly with Berry as we all sampled the wine; I didn't want Lady Aendyr to have to stand there and listen, though she and Lyra now began a discussion about her... she is the cousin-in-law of a PRINCE. No wonder she is such a fine lady.
Though she does seem a little stressed. But I'm sure she just wants everything to go smoothly or she wouldn't have panicked over the wine. It's the sort of thing a true lady knows backwards and forwards.
I guess Bon-Bon and Lyra were helping Berry as they took off with her once our business was concluded.
"AAAAAAA!" There were sounds of crashing in the children's wing and we rushed over to find books falling everywhere as Samantha and Sugar Sparkle tried to hide themselves from Ivan, who was oozing around making monster noises with an aura of shadow around him.
"Ivan, you are scaring them too much," Lunette said chidingly.
"Scare us more!" Sugar Sparkle shouted, laughing.
Lady Aendyr dug Samantha out from under a pile of books while Lunette pulled out Sugar Sparkle. Lord Aendyr began lecturing both of the children about making a mess, ESPECIALLY in a library, while the rest of us helped Twilight reshelve the books; I noticed Lady Aendyr called up an air elemental to carry groups of books for her and felt jealous. I can summon an elemental but I have to spend time negotiating a deal with it; she can just casually call them up; I assume she has a long-term contract.
"Air Elementalist," Twilight now said, studying the elemental.
"It's a not very secret secret that Blackhill's mages usually study this art," Lady Aendyr said, smiling a little. "Glantri's magic revolves around secret arts to a large extent."
Marcus clasped her on the shoulder. "Now we just have to get Ivan to learn magic too."
"That would require him to read something," Lady Aendyr said ruefully.
Ivan now made shadows drift around Lady Aendyr's head as Lord Aendyr eyed them warily. "I am learning magic, just not like you two do it. And I certainly know more about the Immortals than you do. And I'm reading a bunch of things Luna has loaned me." Then he stuck his tongue out at Lady Aendyr. Ivan, don't be gauche!
"I want pudding," Samantha said, eying the shadows.
"I do have ice cream, but not pudding," Twilight said. "Your daddy can show you where to shelve those books there and if you do them all, you can have ice cream." She paused and looked at Lord Aendyr. "If that's okay."
"Do you have strawberry?" he asked, smiling. I relaxed a little. I can't tell what he thinks of me at all... he's been fussing over his kids or arguing with Marcus and Twilight or looking paranoid ever since I met him. His *kid*; Sugar Sparkle is not his kid. But he seems fond of her.
"We do," Twilight said and soon we got the kids in motion again.
I could do with some ice cream, really.
*******************
The ice cream was good but then we had to chase the kids around as they got even more hyper. Especially since Samantha can apparently fly with a spell and got onto the 'roof', so Ivan and Lunette had to climb the tree to get her down.
We got our tour back in motion and went almost everywhere; we're dining at Applejack's tomorrow, so that could wait, and Fluttershy wanted us to wait until tomorrow for some reason. So we headed back home to have dinner and get ready for tonight.
I'd arranged for delivery of food because I could not cook something nice and be out around town; our Prancian cuisine place is not really up to snuff but would have to do as it would at least be high class as I know they're used to.
"Oooh, Averoignean cuisine," Lord Aendyr said appreciatively. I know there are similarities but I am not sure of the connection.
"New Averoigne and Prance are strangely similar; it remains a mystery because one was settled by people from another prime plane and the other is strongly influenced by Griffon culture, but is mainly ponies," Marcus said as I got everything arranged. I had made sure to *have chairs* for my guests. Marcus always uses one anyway. "This is actually Prancian cuisine, which normally doesn't use meat." I had arranged, however, for a large amount of grilled fish for my guests.
Because I am a good hostess who thinks ahead.
I was quite surprised when Sugar Sparkle took a fish as well. But I didn't say anything, worried I would look ignorant. Did Glantrian ponies normally eat meat, unlike us? Or was she just copying her friend?
There was a loud knocking at the front. "Hello, is anyone there?" Fluvia shouted.
No... I have the prototypes, but haven't... but she must want it for the dance.
"I have to go help a client," I told them.
"I promise I won't eat your food," Samantha said solemnly, making some sort of sigil over her heart, traced in the air with her fingers. Her father smiled at that.
I hate to leave Marcus and Lord Aendyr... well, Ivan, Lunette, and Lady Aendyr can keep them in check, I hope.
I galloped off to let Fluvia in and try the outfits on her, praying she would like one of them. They all have far too much whale, but she pranced about in front of a mirror in the one which Rainbow Dash Sr. had designed, a black layer over a white layer, cut away in places to expose the white to match the distinctive patterns of orcas, while still being a well-made elegant dress which would only really say 'Whale' to Orca lovers like her.
"I need one cut for a stallion as well for the dance," she said.
Tiny wafts of steam came out of my ears. "I would need to see him to measure him and..."
"It's a surprise present for him!" she said excitedly. "So I can't have him come in, but he loves orcas, so we'll match!"
It is two hours to the dance. "But I can't make it fit without measuring him," I told her. Or have time to dress up and to help dress everyone up and who is going to run herd on the children? Ivan will stay but I'm sure Lunette has other things to do too.
Now she looked at me with desperate eyes like a sad dog and I shivered. She wants this so much... it must be someone she is in love with. But how can I possibly make a suit for someone I have no measurements for???
I could smell my Salade aux Lardons, sitting on the table, taunting me by being so near and yet so far. Endive lettuce, mustard, shallots... And everything else... I do not have time for this.
But I could not break her heart. "I need something to model him with."
"Let's go to the bathroom." ...
There, she called water out of my sink, formed it into a pony body and we marched it back to the workshop. As I worked, I could heard Marcus and Lord Aendyr bickering and my nerves tensed. Also, *where is Sweetie*? She's supposed to be here by now to get ready and I got food for her!
We were still working when Ivan came out with a plate of food. *My food*. "Helga and Marcus are doing the dishes while Lunette and Darien are trying to get the kids to change into their outfits for the ball."
I heard things rattle in Sweetie's room and winced, so did Ivan.
Lady Aendyr is *washing dishes* in my house.
Which Sweetie is *supposed* to handle!
I am a terrible hostess. I would have exiled myself forever if Fluvia didn't need me to finish this suit.
A noblewoman from Glantri is having to wash *my dishes* because I am a terrible hostess!
Fortunately, my fainting couch is always handy, even though I had left it at Twilight's by mistake.
"Breathe!" Fluvia said and began shaking me.
Ivan laughed nervously, then brought the plate over. "I guess I can hold it for you or something if it helps." He fidgeted aimlessly.
"You should go help Marcus wash dishes and ask Lady Aendyr to join me," I told him.
"I think they're trying to catch up on old times," he said hesitantly. "But I'll go get her."
I winced, feeling bad, but I cannot let Lady Aendyr *do dishes* while she is my guest.
She soon came out and I began eating and working at once with her help. Having air elementals carry food to your mouth is kind of strange and I nearly choked myself at one point. But with that food, I got more strength back and frantically, I tried to get the suit ready.
I was impressed by how easily Fluvia could hold her druid magic for so long and wondered if Fluttershy could do this. We finally finished and I complemented her on it. "Glad to... Fluvia could have shapeshifted INTO HIM," she said, now embarrassed. ...
"I am so sorry," she said and now shaped the water into a ball. "Should I just dump this down the sink?"
"Yes, please," I said weakly.
She now paid me and sprinted off in her new dress with the suit in a nice package. Lady Aendyr watched her go. "You are really a great seamstress," she said softly.
"I am so *sorry* about the dishes. Sweetie and her friends were going to handle it and supervise the kids and they ran off with Clarity and..." I felt increasingly frantic.
Only thirty minutes to get ready.
"It's okay," Lady Aendyr said. "I washed dishes all the time in my childhood and on the road. Especially after we broke too many of them in inns when we got drunk." She rubbed her forehead.
A wild youth. "Yes, but now you are a noblewoman and should not have to do dishes, *especially* when you are a guest." I felt mournful. "We must go to my bedroom and get dressed up. Everyone's eyes will be on us."
Lady Aendyr laughed nervously, then said, "Lead on, Countess Rarity."
Where is Sweetie???
****************
Lady Aendyr looked at my makeup collection as if it was all the gems in the world. I can't help it, an artist cannot paint without all the colors of the rainbow. "My goodness, even Arielle doesn't have that many."
"Who is Arielle?" I asked curiously.
"My maid. I didn't bring her as I assumed that us alone would overcrowd you." She laughed nervously.
How very thoughtful. "She normally does your makeup?"
"Yes," Lady Aendyr said, studying my huge array of lipsticks, powders, rouges, clearly lost.
She is fortunate to have me, an expert in all matters of grooming. "Do not worry, I know just what to do." I felt guilty she had to travel without her staff; I barely have room, though, even for me and Sweetie and Marcus. As it is, I will be sleeping in the workshop so they can have my bed.
I began working her over; I've learned more about human makeup since I sometimes take a human form now. She has a nice even coa... skin tone to start with, which is good. So I worked her over while she watched what I did, no doubt committing it to memory.
"The children, is someone suiting up the children?" I asked in a sudden panic. Sweetie is *still* missing.
"Lunette and Ivan were going to make sure they got dressed and then she has to go but he's going to run herd on them," Lady Aendyr told me. "Thank you, Countess Rarity."
"I am glad to help you, darling," I told her and continued my work, listening for chaotic child noises.
"I guess your mother taught you all this," Lady Aendyr said softly as I worked on her.
"She taught me some of it, but I continued my studies on my own. Mother knows enough to be respectable; I know enough to be *fabulous*." I preened just a little and Lady Aendyr smiled, relaxing a little.
"You know about Carlotta, right?" she asked hesitantly as I worked on her cheeks. Not too much base needed, but what's the right amount of rouge? I studied her face like the paintings I did in school.
"She is a fine lady and a friend of mine," I said and Lady Aendyr visibly relaxed. "What a tragedy," I said. Her loss is my gain.
That sounded far too much like my sister.
I began gently applying rouge; too much and I will have to wash her cheek off and start over. Just a touch. But my touch is very delicate. "Do you know about Twilight and him?"
"I'd like a less garbled version," she told me, so I did the whole story as I worked over her face, then tried to decide on eyeshadow.
"And you two can still get on okay?" Lady Aendyr asked, pursing her lips, eyebrows coming down.
"Relax your eyebrows," I told her but now she made her socket too wide; I fought the urge to giggle. "Her twin is dating his," I told her softly and now she winced, eyes closing, and I was glad I hadn't put the eyeshadow on yet or been in the middle of it. "The problem is largely theirs; I did not know her then and it is all history to me."
"Good. I really thought Carlotta would be the one for him," she said softly, hands on the sink; we were in the bathroom, using the mirror. "He started seeing her around the same time I met Darien. And there was this woman... but it never worked out with her and Ivan either and in the end, she tried to turn him into a kumquat. I'm not even sure what that is."
"A kind of small citrus fruit, very tasty," I told her. I then began applying eyeshadow carefully. "You must miss them a lot."
"Very much sometimes," Lady Aendyr said, trying to keep her eyes still as I worked on them. "So I'm glad to have a chance to see them again. It's been years since we were last all together." I nearly drew a purple line across her face at that. Years.
But that can happen to friends. I haven't seen most of my friends from high school in ages. And the ones I do, I'm not very close to any more. I have new friends now.
Nothing guarantees that will last, though I cherish them all and do not wish to lose them. But then, I can tell Lady Aendyr cherished her friends and lost them.
Though I am sure she has new friends in Glantri too; a lady of refinement will always have friends.
"Then let us make this a night to remember."
Sweetie might even remember to show up!
*********************
Since there will be dancing, Marcus and I decided to alternate forms for the ball. I would be human first and then he would be a pony. Only after I changed forms did I suddenly realize I had not told the plan to my guests. Lady Aendyr seemed unsurprised, but Lord Aendyr stared at me in surprise, then rubbed his forehead. "Sorry," he said. "I shouldn't stare but you caught me off guard."
Marcus kissed me and took my hand. "We'd best hurry; I can hear music already."
Very faintly I could hear soothing tunes of Prancian chamber music, just as I had requested of Lyra and her band. I felt my nerves soothe. All would go smoothly now.
Except...
"Where are Ivan and the children?" I asked.
"He went to... something something, and Fluttershy took the kids," Marcus said.
Oh good, Fluttershy loves children. That should be perfect.
Even if it is *supposed* to be Sweetie's job.
*****************
The hall looked *perfect* with a mix of real and crepe paper clouds; the whole floor was fluffy clouds somehow treated so everyone could walk on them, just to get that feeling of being high in the sky. Dinky had assured me she could make the clouds work and they *did*. Now I owe her something nice.
Later, when the party is over.
For a moment, I thought DJ Pon-3 had somehow been turned into an Alicorn, but then I realized that all of Lyra's band had fake wings on. Then I realized it was Lyra, the Royal Orchestra, along with a few other ponies I didn't know, and DJ Pon-3, who I didn't think *did* this kind of music. She looked bored out of her skull but was somehow producing violin music by scratching records, which *must* be magic.
She looked at me and got this wicked grin which made me twitch but nothing happened, so I relaxed and began looking for people to introduce the Aendyrs to; Mayor Mare and her family descended on us and a long series of introductions began; I must have shaken half the hooves in Equestria. Everyone wanted a piece of the Aendyr's time and I mostly listened to them talking politics or business briefly with many of the hand-shakers, though Lord Aendyr made sure to move crisply; the line was too long not to.
I saw Twilight; she waved to me and looked rueful, then began dancing with West Wind; I'm glad she invited him. I wish them luck. I glanced at Marcus and he was smiling brightly, so I smiled too. 'They're cute.'
'Yeah. I hope we don't have to shake hands all night, though,' he said ruefully. 'I want to dance with you.'
Me too, but this sort of thing is an important part of the noble life and I know they have business to do in Canterlot soon; this should help; I recognized many Canterlot notables who were busy eating the snacks, dancing, and mingling.
While I shook hooves and tried to keep track of names. But now they probably think I am one of the Aendyrs. I didn't think about that. But this is for them, not me.
Lord Aendyr handled it well, a smile on his lips unlike his usual scowl, greeting each of them; many he knew already to my surprise, or at least recognized them, while Lady Aendyr just shook hooves and kept saying, "Wind's blessing on you," over and over and over.
Marcus also had to keep fielding questions about Celestia coming, since he kept being introduced as her special agent. I don't see Big Mac or Celestia. Or Luna, but I expect they have a grand entrance planned.
*********************
I finally got to actually dance with Marcus, who is a wonderful dancer, spinning me around with ease as Lord and Lady Aendyr did an elaborate dance with a lot of jumping; despite her being taller, they somehow could both leap the same distance easily and then spin around together to leap again. At one point, they spun in the air; I think they were on an air elemental. That got them applause; many hooves stomped the floor and I clapped with Marcus and a handful of other humans present.
SWEETIE WAS... deep breaths, Rarity. Still missing.
*Still* missing.
I was starting to worry now.
But it was all nice and soothing and then I switched with Lady Aendyr and waltzed with Lord Aendyr, who waltzes beautifully, while Lady Aendyr danced with Marcus. "I hope you're having a good time."
"I didn't expect anything this fancy, but thank you," he said, smiling, and I wondered again why he and Marcus get along so badly. I glimped Rainbow Dash Sr. and Crash dancing with some stallions and I wondered if Crash was still seeing Cruisin' or not. But Crash looked *wonderful* in that dress.
"Only the best for my dear Marcus' dear friend and her family," I said warmly and now his smile wobbled. "It is nice to spend some time with elegant company as well. People of distinction."
Now he had an odd look on his face but the smile came back, more pasted on this time, though, which worried me. "From what Helga tells me, you and your friends are definitely ponies of distinction. Certainly worthy of respect." His head started to turn towards his wife, who was... lifting Marcus over her head? It was some sort of dance, not very dignified but certainly she is impressively strong. I couldn't lift Marcus over my head in human form.
I think.
"We have had some good adventures. But a lot of it is for the crown and I can't talk about it too much," I told him. "But thank you." How very gracious of him to want me to feel better. So why do he and Marcus clash so much? "I want you to meet everyone but I can't see anyone but Twilight here. Though Fluttershy will be with us tomorrow." Dash is off hiding from her mother for *no good reason* and... well, this isn't Applejack's thing. But I'm surprised I haven't seen Pinkie.
Or Spike or Spikey. They love parties like this.
He opened his mouth, then shut it and sighed. "So how long have you lived in Ponyville?"
We talked awhile about my life here and the more we talked, the more convinced I became that his feud with Marcus makes *no sense*. He had good manners, was polite, intelligent... what is it with them? Why doesn't he trust Marcus?
Then I saw Dona Carlotta, Herr Otto, and Herr Sigismund off across the party talking to Bon-Bon and Berry; I hadn't realized that they were still in Canterlot; they must have come down with Celestia... wherever she is.
Herr Sigismund saw us and came our way, leaving the others behind and bowed to me, which was flattering, given he is the son of Prince Jaggar and his heir. "Uncle, it is good to see you."
"It's good to see you, Sigismund," Lord Aendyr said. He twirled around in his suit. "How do you like it?"
"Father would like that outfit," Herr Sigismund said, studying it.
Ka-ching! I smell opportunity!
"Countess Rarity made it," he said. "You should see her about getting one made for Jaggar before you have to go home."
Thank you so much, Lord Aendyr. That should boost my business!
I am hoping to make some contacts, though my concern, of course, is to spend some time with my guests and get to know them better.
It was at this point that DJ Pon-3 announced, "We now have a special fashion show of Mistress Clarity's new line of Glantrian Fashions," and they switched to a spritely tune as Clarity put the Crusaders and various friends of theirs through their paces. They're mostly terrible models, though Sweetie will be a beauty one day and Shining Star looked great in her Belcadizian dancing dress. But I would have loved this opportunity but I had too much to do, too much to do.
But I didn't invite them here to make money. This is for my guests and they enjoyed watching it, laughing and applauding... you shouldn't laugh at a fashion show but the kids didn't mind, they ate up all the attention.
"Very impressive," Herr Sigismund said. "A relative of yours, Countess Rarity?"
"My sister," I told him. This should... it now struck me that she doesn't *have* an actual fashion business yet... it was all imaginary. This is her chance to actually set herself up as a real fashion mogul.
I could tell everyone was impressed by her designs, though. Those watching, anyway; a lot of people had scattered to eat, drink, and talk during the show.
I chatted with Herr Sigismund and Lord Aendyr as we watched and then the kid models and Clarity cleared out and DJ Pon-3 grinned again. "And we have a special guest! Time for the special song."
"Do we have to?" one of the orchestra ponies said, grimacing as he sat at the piano.
"By request of the PRINCESS, here's HOWL AT THE MOON!" DJ Pon-3 shouted.
I stared in absolute horror; that's not the kind of song you play at a shindig like this *at all*.
Lyra was laughing her head off and I wondered how you even played that song on a lyre. But the band gamely launched into it, and Princess Luna, back in her normal form and in full royal regalia, descended from the roof on a giant crescent moon, *singing it*. I could see the Crusaders and other fillies and colts their age busy dancing to it and enjoying it while most of the guests stared mindlessly.
I am pretty sure that I fainted at that point, overwhelmed with horror.
*********************
The song had ended but now Sweetie was up on the moon with Luna, busy singing Fly Me To the Moon. People could dance to that, thankfully and Lord Aendyr offered me a drink which I consumed as fast as manners allowed. I could see Princess Celestia had arrived, but in her 'Vanilla Surprise' form; she was dancing with Big Mac, Cherilee, and some stallion I didn't recognize.
I could see Apple Blossom and the Orange family as well, circulating among the crowd, and I regretted Applejack wasn't here. Lady Aendyr was talking to another tall blond human I didn't know, who had a wreath on her head and a fancy green dress that... it looked oddly familiar. But the other woman now turned to me. "How do you fare, my friend?" she said. "Or were you fainting for dramatic effect?" She stumbled slightly, then sighed.
Her voice... "Do I know you?" I asked in confusion.
"It's me, Applejack. I figured... I thought I would see how the other half lives, since I kind... since I promised I would and never got around to it," she said. Her voice kept wobbling.
I could see Marcus now, talking to Carlotta while Otto tried to destroy Marcus' head with his gaze. I sighed at that. But one problem at a time.
I saw Fluvia now dancing with a grey-maned purple Earth pony stallion, wearing the suit I made for her for... he must be her love. He looked somewhat trapped, though. But I wished them well.
"You look marvelous, Applejack, though you could use some makeup as well," I told her.
"One step at a time," she said firmly. "Hey, want to dance?" she asked Herr Sigismund.
"I would love to," he said to her, smiling. They were soon dancing, though Applejack clearly didn't know what she was doing.
"Well, I think this is going to be a grand success," I said. Despite Princess Luna deciding... why did she *do* that?
But no harm done, I think. So now...
I felt a huge surge of magic; every unicorn in the place turned and stared at an open space by one wall and though Princess Luna kept singing, she moved so she was between Sweetie and the surge.
"Oh fuck," I heard Marcus say and he moved between Carlotta and the surge of magic as well.
Shadows and ribbons of light intermixed and then collapsed into the form of an Belcadizian elven woman of great beauty with long black hair and an elaborate white and black dress, white layers over a black base with various cuts which looked like runes to me. She wore a golden crown set with rubies and emeralds and four other Belcadizians, two women and two men stood around her in a box formation.
One of them announced, "All hail Dona Carnelia de Belcadiz y Fedorias, Princess of Belcadiz, Vice-Queen of Monteleone, and Marquesa de Alhambra! She who cast down Grazzt and Igwwilv, slayer of the great beast Harambas, and heir to a thousand year dynasty! The rightful queen of Glantrian elves, you are honored by her presence!"
A few Belcadizian elves who had come down from the capital applauded, a few ponies politely stomped their hooves and Don Diego, who I had not seen before, shouted, "Hello, sister! It's good to see you!"
Mayor Mare emerged from the crowd and said, "Welcome to Ponyville, your highness."
Dona Carnelia coolly studied Mayor Mare, then said, "Thank you, Mayor." Then she pointed at Luna. "We must talk. *Now*."
That set off a wave of whispers, though Marcus actually relaxed a little to my surprise; I could see Otto and Carlotta still looked very tense.
I could see Sweetie whipping her cards out and trying to do a reading as Princess Luna coldly said, "You have no right to give me orders, Carnelia. This is not Glantri, and here, you are no different from anyone else. Whereas I am one of the Diumvirate."
I... didn't think she disliked Carnelia, given she was going around as a Belcadizian earlier. Lord Aendyr was whispering frantically to Lady Aendyr, who had her eyes warily on Princess Carnelia.
For a second, I thought Carnelia was going to hurl a lightning bolt across the room, but one of her elves whispered to her, and now with a voice like she was gargling glass, Princess Carnelia said, "I request an audience with Princess Luna of Equestria in private over a matter of one of my subjects who is in your land."
"I'm not going back, Mother!" Dona Carlotta shouted and I winced. Her aunt's eyes moved to study her and I could now see that Carnelia hadn't actually *seen* her before. Marcus, who was in the middle of this line of sight, looked ready to drop dead, but didn't move. "I won't back down a second time!"
Otto took her hand and said, "We are under Prince Jaggar's protection!"
Spitting in the face of an angry queen is not wise. Marcus, at least, had the sense not to shout defiance.
"Granted," Luna said, flying down to Princess Carnelia. Then shadows enveloped her and the five Belcadizians. Then the shadows faded and they were gone.
Lady Aendyr now ran over to Marcus and company and the rest of us trailed after her. "Does she know?" Lady Aendyr asked Marcus.
"I know he was Eric," Carlotta said softly. "Hello, Helga. It's good to see you."
"It's my job to protect her," Otto said angrily to Marcus.
"I am not a wilting flower," Carlotta said irritably, frowning now and looking more like her aunt.
Twilight had teleported up onto the moon. "Okay, let's get this party going again!" she said as it wobbled under her. "How about the Moonlight Sonata?"
That clearly made the orchestra happy, though DJ Pon-3 had a weird look on her face like she knew something.
Oh dear.
"Marcus, darling," I said, then couldn't even remember what I wanted to say.
"So you're Herr Otto," Lady Aendyr said softly to Herr Otto. "You must be a brave man."
His eyes narrowed. "Of course I am. I am a lord of Aalban, after all."
Countess Cadence and Shining Armor now galloped across the room and out a side door. I wondered where they were going so fast.
Lady Aendyr winced and buried her face in her hands. "She means that anyone who is willing to risk Carnelia's wrath must be brave by definition, unlike some people I know who run away from her, abandoning alleged lovers," Lord Aendyr said, his voice moving from gentle to angry by the end.
"It would have only gotten Eric killed pointlessly or trapped in eternal nightmares," Dona Carlotta said, frowning. "And we agreed on it."
"Has anyone seen Ivan?" Lady Aendyr asked, clearly trying to change the subject. "I wanted to dance with him."
"Probably trying to pick Princess Carnelia's pocket," Lord Aendyr grumbled.
"He went off with Luna before the party and I haven't seen him since," Marcus said, then sighed deeply. "Hopefully, this won't blow up into a giant fight that levels the ball."
I *desperately* hope that. I didn't invite them here so they could get caught in a brawl.
It was time for some elegant dancing.
*******************
I was dancing with Herr Sigismund while Otto danced with Lady Aendyr, Marcus with Applejack, and Dona Carlotta with Lord Aendyr. The music was elegant and the ball was a grand success despite interruptions.
Then I heard DJ Pon-3 laugh to herself and I felt the icy hand of *doom*.
Worse, nothing bad happened. Vanilla Surprise and Big Mac and Cherilee and the stallion... I *still* don't know his name... all danced past us, waving, and I waved back, though it was easier for me with hands. I could see Twilight and West Wind but no sign of Dash, though I had invited her and Soarin'.
Then I saw...was it Dash? A pony who looked just like Dash, except her colors were all different. Khaki coat and her hair was various shades of black and grey in stripes; she wore an olive green shirt and a pith helmet and had a compass rose cutie mark. Daring Doo, but Daring Doo is a fictional character, which means... it has to be Rainbow Dash in disguise, HIDING FROM HER MOTHER. She's shorter than Dash normally is now, but there's magic for shrinking as well as getting bigger.
I was both impressed by her ingenuity and frustrated at her running away like this. Especially since I could see Crash was here with her mother, dancing with two stallions. Dash's father was off talking to two nobles... from the Dacoatas, I think. I recognize their heraldry.
When the music ended, I bid my farewell for the moment and went to confront her about being silly; she didn't notice me as she was watching Ditzy and Dr. Smith dancing with an oddly wistful look. I probably imagined it because Dash would not care. "Dash, stop being ridiculous. Did you make Soarin' dress up as Clarion?" Clarion is the son of Daring Doo's mentor, and a sometimes rival, sometimes would-be coltfriend of Daring Doo. It's complicated, which makes it interesting.
Daring Dash started and looked at me. "What?" She even disguised her voice... It had never hit me before how much Daring Doo looks like Dash but she does.
"You know what I mean, darlin'," I told her. I pointed at Rainbow Dash, Sr. "There is your mother. Don't hide from her." I began trying to herd her.
"I don't know this person!" she protested as I pushed her, but I couldn't move her. My human form isn't strong enough.
Distantly, I heard Pinkie chanting about fine linen but I could not see her anywhere and I chalked it up to nerves. Why would Pinkie chant about fine linen, anyway?
"I am not whoever you think I am!" she shouted and now Rainbow Dash, Sr. and Crash both looked at us, along with the stallions they were dancing with and I suddenly wondered why Rainbow Dash, Sr. wasn't dancing with her husband, though he did seem wrapped in an argument with people.
I felt... I could see the Crusaders looking at us in unison and starting to come my way, looking determined and I suddenly felt I had stepped into some sort of quicksand.
Daring Dash saw them, facehoofed and bolted, taking to the air, but now Dinky did something magical and one of the clouds dropped and they all got on and began cruising after her. "Come back here! We know you're an Oard!" Dinky shouted.
"That's just Dash hiding from her mother!" I shouted.
Dash's mother saw this and took to the air after Daring Dash, Crash following her. "Young lady, you can't dye yourself sepia and expect to fool me!" she shouted, flying after her.
A small part of me admired the sheer effort. Dash had covered her cutie mark, evenly dyed her coat and dyed each of the shades of her mane an appropriate sepia-scale color. With utter, perfect precision. My inner artist saluted her.
The rest of me saw clouds and elementals starting to be knocked around by the chase and cringed, doubly so when Ditzy took to the air. "Daring, come back!" she shouted. "Don't run away!" Roseluck now trotted up to Dr. Smith and they began yelling at each other about something.
I stared, wondering if she was just caught up in the moment or thought this was Daring Doo for *real*.
It began to rain on everyone as more pegasi took to the sky, trying to contain the weather chaos and some of the crepe paper clouds became sodden, falling on people, as Unicorns tried to fend off the falling objects and everyone else began running for cover.
Pinkie chose this moment to arrive, even as Lyra's band either scattered or began using magic to shield themselves. DJ Pon-3 announced, "The band will now take a break so they can rest and hydrate." She now broke down laughing at her own wit.
I heard an odd noise as if someone in the audience was very excited by the idea of hydrating.
I resisted the urge to look as I did not want to know.
However, I noticed some of the rain now began falling upwards and reforming into clouds. But some of it turned into FREEZING SLEET. I could hear ponies yelling at each other about ice and water and others just screaming.
Daisy went past me, howling as if the end of the world had come.
"And in their stead, we have a guest appearance by MC 300 Hand Tall Pale Red Cobbler and the Dragon Princes of Ponyville," DJ Pon-3 said with an almost insane glee as Spikey, dressed like some sort of street thug, now came up to take over her equipment; she galloped off over to Octavia, who looked in horror as Pinkie, wearing a black hat, a clock on a gold chain, a blue jacket and black pants now came out with a thugged-up Spike onto the stage. A dozen dragons in golden baggy pants shuffled in behind them.
The audience stared in absolute shock and I stared with them, with a slowly swelling sense of the apocalypse coming.
"This one is dedicated to my friend Rarity, who is always elegant even when she's covered with whipped cream and sprinkles!" Pinkie shouted, pointing at me.
I have *never* been covered with whipped cream and sprinkles!
But everyone looked at me as if I had.
The worst part was Lady Aendyr looking at me in surprise; I wanted to just *die*, and I fell onto my fainting couch.
o/~ Rarity is the best mare in town / Rarity will make you a gown o/~ she began to chant as Spike sang backup and the dragons... where did she get all those dragons???? They danced in eerie unison behind her. o/~ Now it's a party / Time for Rarity to get down! o/~
Then she began chanting about how I was as tasty as chocolate mixed with strawberry and something about Marcus and I began to hope the whole place would just collapse and bury me. It could be my monument for the day I died of embarrassment.
Lady Aendyr began blowing clouds around with magic, joined by her husband; I could see the melding of their magics, working to calm the chaos in the sky, even as the Crusaders began opening up with... where did they get all those wands? How are Twist and Apple Bloom *using* wands? Why is Scootaloo spinning around on her back on the cloud and chanting along with Pinkie???
I couldn't think, couldn't do anything but panic and despair for the doom of my party. I could see nobles covered in cake to the left and Crash yelling at Scootaloo to the right and Daring Dash knocking clouds around like tenpins trying to escape them.
At this very moment, I could see Marcus trying to get to me as lightning rained down around him; he dodged desperately with Applejack, until she just hefted him and threw him to my side, then began running towards Twilight, shouting about trees. Then she hit an ice patch and slid, crashing into Fluvia and her friends and...
Marcus embraced me, shivering, then relaxed. "I think if we join our power, we can start yanking the Crusaders off the cloud and end this mess."
Then I saw Spike looking ready to burn the place down as Pinkie began a particularly poorly thought through chant about how much Marcus and I love each other, which would have been sweet if it was MARCUS singing to me and Spike was *not right there*.
Spike now launched into a song about the evil deeds of Eric of Vestland, notorious breaker of women's hearts and abandoner of them when they most trusted him. I winced and Marcus grimaced and Pinkie... Pinkie stared; this clearly was NOT part of the plan, for which I was grateful. Pinkie can be thoughtless but not THAT thoughtless.
"Spike, I told you we couldn't do that one!" Pinkie said frantically.
Luna and Carnelia now entered with her followers and stared at the rising chaos. Luna began shouting orders, but no one could see her, while Carnelia... began singing along with Spike, counterpointing his song with her rant about how Eric had seduced her innocent niece and how Herr Otto was clearly Eric in disguise! ...
Marcus made a gurgling noise of disbelief.
Spike opened his mouth wide and Spikey tried to block him speaking; fire went everywhere, crepe paper went up in flames and then the dragon backup dancers went berserk and began to rampage even as Pinkie began chanting about how... Carnelia was the real Eric of Vestland???
At this point, trumpets blared and Manuel of the Plains rode in on Platinum. He began saving people from the chaos and now Carnelia saw him. "YOU!!!!!"
"I am indeed myself!" he shouted as he pulled Daisy out of a trashcan and sent her on her way.
At this very moment, Fluttershy came flying in; I could see Samantha riding Sugar Sparkle behind her, floating in the air. "I can't find Sugar Sparkle or Samantha anywhere!" she shouted to me. ...
"She's right behind you," Marcus shouted. Fluttershy spun and the kids moved; one of them must have done some kind of spell to move themselves whenever she turned around.
"I am never playing Hide and Seek again!" Fluttershy wailed.
"Samantha!" Lord Aendyr shouted at her, clearly unhappy with her prank. With good reason.
Rain poured down on the fire. Fluvia shouted something to Fluttershy, who now noticed the chaos and the flames. Fluttershy breathed hard, then suddenly exploded into a huge water spout. Which flung *everything* around, dousing the fire but also flinging people everywhere, including flinging us right at Princess Carnelia, who went down with us on top of her, sending Applejack and Herr Sigismund up into the air and crashing through the Crusader's cloud and then crashing onto Ditzy, who plummeted down into the punch bowl with them, and totally dousing Princess Luna.
Marcus picked me up and ran, screaming, while I screamed, both of us utterly panicked as Carnelia shouted curses at us and hurled spells we could barely dodge, until Shining Armor caught us both in a glowing ball of force and rolled us out the door to safety. And on down the street because he used too much force. We headed for the river as I saw the grand hall seething in chaos.
I began to wail, instinctively summoned my fainting couch and now we were both pinned to the walls and utterly discombobulated by it all.
It could not possibly get any worse.
********************
It's amazing how fast this sphere can float down a river. Even our combined strength couldn't break it either, and I began to think the party would crash and burn without us. But then Dash dove out of the sky, out of her costume, wearing an orange flight suit and Soarin' was with her in his Wonderbolt uniform. They crashed into the sphere and it popped, dumping Marcus and I into the water to cling to my fainting couch, though Dash and Soarin' went flying into trees in the process.
Then they pulled us out of the water and I leaned on a tree, wet and miserable. Marcus leaned by me, an arm around me.
"What the hell happened? We were out flying and saw you come tumbling out," Dash said.
"That wasn't you at the party disguised as Daring Doo?" I asked, eyes narrowing. I'd assumed she'd found some way to shrink herself to complete the disguise, but apparently not.
"What? Damn, that would have been awesome and Soarin' could have been Clarion! Hmm, could have made the Amulet of Rarashishboomba, too..." Dash was now lost inside her own head.
I could see hordes of bat ponies descending on the distant pillar of fire, smoke, and steam which had once been my grand ball. "Just bury me here," I said, moaning.
"We can't die, we have to save our guests," Marcus said. "You two mind giving us a ride?"
"You'll have to boost Soarin'," Dash said.
Marcus cast the spell and rode Dash while I rode Soarin'. The wind blow-dried me but now I was an utterly frizzled mess. Hands made holding onto Soarin' a lot easier, I have to say.
We approached the ruins of what had been a ball. Applejack had hogtied the Crusaders. Manuel of the Plains galloped off with Carnelia and her flunkies chasing him. Shining Armor was reinforcing the walls as Twilight did magical repairs. Pinkie was crumpled up in a ball, looking frustrated. Spikey was patting her on the back and Clarity stood by them, looking stunned and drenched. I couldn't see Spike anywhere to my surprise. Ditzy, Daring Doo or whoever it was, and Dr. Smith had all vanished. Vanilla Surprise and Big Mac were helping to do repairs and West Wind was working with other pegasi to herd clouds around.
Fluttershy was on the ground, apparently passed out, while Fluvia stood guard over her protectively and Lord Aendyr lectured Samantha and Sugar Sparkle. Lady Aendyr was busy assisting with repairs and cleanup. Much of the nobility had fled the site, probably never to return. Luna was busy directing batponies and Ivan was helping Lady Aendyr.
"Never ever do that to someone again," Lord Aendyr said firmly to his daughter, waving at me with one hand without looking as Samantha and Sugar Sparkle stared at the ground. "You scared poor Fluttershy to death."
"I just always lose at hide and seek," Samantha mumbled. "I thought she'd dispel it once she realized she was there."
"She can't feel magic like you and I do," I told her sternly. I think. I know she can do Druid magics, but I think that's a different power source. "Not arcane magic. She was terrified that you got hurt; she lives right near the Everfree and that's dangerous."
The candy wore off now and I turned back to pony form and sighed.
"Where is Spike?" I asked.
"Off with Countess Cadence," Lord Aendyr said. "Getting a stern talking to, I think." He made grumbly noises and turned back to his daughter and her friend. "I think it is time for us to go home and put these two to bed."
I went to check on Fluttershy, who now recovered as I nuzzled her gently. "You okay, dear?" I asked her.
"No but I'll live," she mumbled. "Thank you, Fluvia."
"Just keep practicing," Fluvia said firmly to Fluttershy, who nodded. "Rarity, thank you for the dress. It's perfect."
I smiled weakly. At least one thing went right.
"I'm sorry I wrecked your party," Fluttershy said weakly.
"It was wrecked long before you arrived," I told her and leaned on her. "It seems like every time I dream big, it blows up in my face."
We leaned on each other a while until we both felt better.
****************
"Thank you for the nice party," Lady Aendyr said as we took the kids home. "I assume the brawl wasn't planned, but I enjoyed that." ...
Lord Aendyr said, "At least there were no undead this time. Never going to a party in Klantyre again."
"Not until Samantha is much older," Lady Aendyr said.
"Good candy there, though," Marcus mumbled.
Lord Aendyr glared at him and I said sharply, "Get over it, Lord Aendyr. I am sick of you two glaring at each other and I am *not* going to put up with it."
He started and blinked at me.
"And don't you say anything either, Marcus. I didn't invite them here so everyone could chew on each other's heads." I was being far too blunt but my patience was gone. At least they didn't attack each other.
"He..." Lord Aendyr began.
"NOTHING," I snapped.
The rest of the trip was in miserable silence, though at least Marcus put his hand on my back, which was a little comfort. But now Lady Aendyr wasn't happy either and... this just can't get any worse.
*********************
"You go back to Canterlot to see Dash's museum and everything tomorrow, right?" Sweetie said at breakfast. "So you're still here today?"
"Yes. I planned this as a day of rest and recovery. Then tomorrow we go to Canterlot, since you're back in school the day after that," I told her.
"Perfect. You can try the dungeon we built so you can have an adventure together!" Sweetie announced.
They built a dungeon.
"Oh that sounds fun," Lady Aendyr said before I could shut things down. "Someone who can actually handle Samantha and Sugar Sparkle will need to babysit them, though."
"I want to go in the dungeon!" Samantha insisted. "I'm a big girl!"
Sweetie blinked, then laughed. "I'm sorry but this is for adults only."
"You're not an adult!"
She and Sweetie now had a long argument about adulthood while I felt my peaceful day slip away and die. Still, it's not like...
Then I remembered the Moonraker and laughed nervously. "It's not another flying warmachine, right?"
"It's in one of the hills under Sweet Apple Acres. There were already some caves, so we just improved on that," Sweetie said.
How did they find time to build a dungeon???
On the other hand, hitting things until they fall down might get rid of my stress.
"I do..." Lord Aendyr looked at Lady Aendyr and sighed. "Okay."
"It will be fun. And the kids must have worked very hard to get this done in time," Lady Aendyr said to him, patting his hand.
"You ever been in a dungeon, Darien?" Marcus asked him.
"No head chewing," I said firmly. What is it with stallions?
"I have a GD from the Great School, unlike you, and thus passed such tests for my Basic through Companion level tests, thank you," Lord Aendyr said sullenly. "My wife got her GD as well. Unlike you."
"Congratulations," Marcus said warmly to Lady Aendyr. "That should shut up anyone whining about your status."
"I wish," she said wearily. "I'm going to be proving myself until I die with some people."
Marcus patted her hand. "I'm sorry. You're probably a better wizard than me at this point."
"Mommy's a great wizard," Samantha said proudly.
"I'm not on a level with your friend Twilight, but I am good," Lady Aendyr said proudly.
"Hardly anyone's on a level with Twilight," Marcus said, shaking his head. "There's no shame in that. She will be one of the great wizards of our age. I don't think she knows any secret arts, but otherwise, she could probably easily match any of the Princes of Glantri."
"We asked Pinkie and she volunteered to play with your kids," Sweetie now said.
"I think we're going to need a unicorn," Lord Aendyr said, sighing. "Who can't be hornswoggled by simple tricks."
"Pinkie babysits a baby unicorn, she can handle it," Sweetie said. "And she's a Bard."
I now had a good idea.
*****************
Pinkie and Lyra clapped hooves. "Bard sisters forever!" they shouted. "We'll musically educate as we babysit."
"I'm so sorry about your band," I told Lyra. I still don't know what a mangoon band is and nothing showed up claiming to be it; I must have been flaking out when I wrote that.
"It's okay," Lyra said. "It wasn't your fault." She turned to Samantha. "You can ride me back to Pinkie's if you want."
"YEAH!" They soon galloped off together, singing a song.
Okay, that should go smoothly.
I hope.
******************
I carefully pinned Lady Aendyr's hair into a bun. "Why a bun?" I asked.
"My 'air armor' spell... kind of blows all of your hair straight up the whole time," Lady Aendyr said, laughing. "You should spray this on yourself." She passed me a perfume bottle.
"What does it do?" I asked.
"Keeps small vermin off you; my air armor blows them away but I have this for situations where I can't use air armor. Otherwise, you may end up infested by the time you leave a dungeon," she said.
I made sure to spritz myself thoroughly; it has a pleasant smell of cherry blossoms.
"So what made you decide to take up wizardry?" I asked her curiously as we continued suiting up for the dungeon; I could hear the men in another room and prayed they were not trying to kill each other. Sweetie was supposed to be helping them. I could feel her cringing through the wall.
"It's the only way to get any respect in Glantri. There's some things I love about it and some I hate and the dumping on non-wizards is the big hate thing." She sighed. "So I used my share of a Ring of Three Wishes to get the potential and then I could learn. Marcus taught me the very basics, and then I studied."
"You each got one?" I asked curiously. Marcus had never told me about this.
She paused and laughed nervously. "Yes."
He could wish for anything... what did he wish for?
I raised an eyebrow. "Did he wish for something foolish?"
She sighed, then picked up a large axe with runes on the blade and swished it, moving away from me. "Marcus found out what it was by accidentally wishing for a sandwich." ...
"Ivan used his to make his parents' farm more fertile," she said softly. "I wanted to help my parents too, but it took me a while to be able to do so. My parents farm on our estates now. And my siblings too. I convinced them all to move and now they have four times as much land and won't get shot if they do a little hunting."
"Ivan... I'm not sure *what* he plans, but he wants to change things in Karameikos," I told her. "Some kind of big change." Does she know about the Immortality quest? Should I tell her?
"I don't know if going head to head with Petra, Halav and Zirchev is very wise, but then Ivan always dreamed big and got in over his head. We grew up a few miles from each other; our fathers are brothers," Lady Aendyr said softly. She touched the axe and it shrank down and became an earring which she donned. "I've never been good at politics, which makes my life hard sometimes, because Glantrian nobles are knee-deep in it. I just stand next to Darien and look terrifying and back him up because I still... A lot of Glantrians look down on him because he married me and it doesn't help that Marcus looks down on him too." She was wearing leather armor now and reached into a pocket, pulling out her staff. "I think Twilight likes him; he really enjoyed meeting her. He's a scholar more than a politician, though he has no choice but to do the latter. I just hope Samantha won't face a lot of prejudice." Then she sagged. "But she will. She's too young to get it, but I see it already." Her voice was now very bitter. "But no one here cares about that. So I envy him that."
Him? Oh, Marcus, I guess. "My father hates Marcus."
"All fathers hate Marcus," Lady Aendyr said, smiling ruefully. "Mothers too, usually. But especially Fathers. I remember that mob that chased us out of that little village... we had to jump in the river and then that giant turtle attacked us. I never found out why there was a giant turtle hanging out in a river in Darokin." Her eyes were far away now. "It would be a lot easier if I could just solve everything by hitting it like the old days."
I heard Lord Aendyr's voice rise and we both winced. "But those days are gone," she said softly, staring at the wall.
"But why do the Glantrians look down on you? You are a Wizard after all. It's not like they were born Wizards the way I was born a Unicorn," I said hesitantly. I felt I wasn't grasping something.
"Upstarts are never taken well by nobles, doubly so in Glantri if they were originally just a warrior like me. And I look like a barbarian to them." She touched her hair and her arm, which looked very strong to me, especially in the leather armor. "I do my best to fit in, but I am still rather awkward. Being noble doesn't come naturally to me like it does to you," she said to me.
I had no idea at all what to say to that. I don't feel natural, though I try very hard. I have worked hard to be this elegant and noble. And it still feels fake sometimes.
"You looked so natural at the ball," she said wistfully. "Knowing all the dances and being so graceful and speaking like a high-born lady. I can speak Alphatian now but I sound terrible. Samantha... she's good. But kids learn easier."
"Samantha speaks Alphatian?" I said in shock.
"Well, only as well as a kid her age, but she has the right accent. Like Darien. His house is descended from Alphatian settlers from centuries ago. They're kin to the House of Aalban, which was founded by a mixture of Thyatian and Alphatian refugees. It's why I'm now Prince Jaggar's cousin-in-law-by-marriage, which is... I would never have imagined that." Now her eyes were very distant. "I was only a touch older than Sweetie when I met Marcus. He was Cufen then. He drifted into town, looking barely older than us. He and Ivan became friends and he came with us when we went on our Shearing. I expected to have a few adventures, come home with enough money to buy more land and get a good husband, like most women did on their Shearings. They go and serve as a maid or learn a craft, build a dowry and come home. I never thought of the things I would see or the places I would go or who I would become." She studied her hands, rough hands and worn; the beautiful rings she wore looked like they'd wandered in from somewhere else. "This ring is worth what my parents used to earn in a decade," she said softly, idly stroking it with one finger. The amethyst gleamed brightly in the lamplight. "One of Darien's kin gives me a ring like this twice a year, once for my birthday and once for Arcanium, which is both the national holiday of Blackhill and one of the biggest in Glantri as a whole. Each one is different. I don't know what he'll do when he works through every kind of gemstone. But he's some kind of gem wizard." She glanced at my cutie mark. "Which I guess your Cutie Mark relates to, right?"
"I have a knack for finding and using gems, though I am not a jeweler," I told her. "But I would enjoy sharing notes with him; I am trying to learn more magic."
She touched my horn, froze, and pulled her hand back. "I'm sorry, that was terribly rude of me." Her shoulders slumped. "Does Marcus really have an invisible horn now?"
"Celestia gave it to him," I told her. I am not entirely clear on why, given he could use magic before. "It's only visible in his pony form."
There was a soft chime; I wove the reply spell and Twilight teleported into the room. It's a unicorn protocol which Twilight often forgets. "The Crusaders haven't really kidnapped your children in order to make you go into a dungeon after them, right?"
We both stared at her in surprise.
"I got a garbled message from Cadence. Someone tried to send Spike a message in the middle of him eating and it got messed up," Twilight said hesitantly.
"The Crusaders built us a 'dungeon', so we're going to explore it," Lady Aendyr said. "It should be cute."
Twilight rubbed her forehead with a hoof. "They built a flying treehouse which is now used by the Equestrian SkyNavy as a warship, full of traps. And Apple Bloom is training under *Keraptis*, which I think is really not wise, but they won't listen." Twilight shifted back and forth on her hooves. "I'd better go with you. I can't finish my current experiment with Spike gone, anyway. He's going to Canterlot with Cadence for a few weeks to cool off." She sighed. "I suppose I could get Dinky to help but she always starts putting her weird cosmological theories into everything."
"We've handled dungeons much worse than what kids can make," Lady Aendyr said and I wondered now again if this was wise. But she wanted to do this so much... I felt I couldn't say no.
And I have survived worse too. "I'm sure everyone would love to have you, Twilight."
"I'd better go."
We could hear Marcus loudly through the wall and Twilight sighed. "So what exactly is up with those two?"
"I don't know," Lady Aendyr said. "If I knew, I could stop it. They don't like or trust each other at all. They both expect the other is going to fail at everything all the time. I do know Darien worries because Marcus tends to be surrounded by disaster all the time. And it probably didn't help that Darien mistook him for a servant the first time they met." She rubbed her forehead. "I hoped they would get over it, being away from each other."
"Marcus is kind of unlucky but..." Twilight sighed. "He likes West Wind, so it's not like he hates any guy who gets close to one of his female friends."
I had a coltfriend like that once, which is part of why I'm not seeing him anymore. It drove me crazy. He freaked out if I talked to any colt about anything at all.
We have to find some way to get them to trust each other. Maybe they will learn some respect for each other from this.
*******************
The entrance to the dungeon was obscured by vines, which Ivan pushed away with a ten foot pole. He'd insisted on bringing it for some reason, though Lady Aendyr had a staff. Thankfully, the children had thought to scale the entrance for humans so everyone could get in; given my own boost in size since our quest in the Broken Lands, I can use a larger entrance myself. We're all big enough for a human to ride without magic now, though still smaller than Celestia.
It was well cut and dressed stone inside to my surprise; how did they possibly carve all this out so quickly? I was impressed. Though I know Earth Ponies are good at this kind of thing. They work wonders with the Earth. And its products.
The walls were covered with odd images of huge green devil faces with gaping mouths, oddly stylized lightning bolts and mummies... running away from goats? All had a thin layer of dirt on them which Ivan rubbed at with his pole.
"Don't touch the devil faces," Marcus said, frowning. "I assume you all are listening in?"
"We can hear you!" Sweetie said proudly. "We're watching you all on a crystal ball."
Lady Aendyr blinked. "Is this the new thing in dungeons these days?"
"Well, it was at White Plume Mountain," Marcus said. "Did you consult a book on famous dungeons to decorate the place?"
"Oh wow, you recognize it!" Dinky said proudly. "I checked out Volumes I through VIII of Famous Dungeons Quarterly."
Twilight facehoofed. "Aargh, I could have brought that."
"Not with it checked out," Dinky said. "I'm afraid a lot of this isn't as pretty as the entrance hallway, because most of it is natural caves we just added stuff to."
Ivan continued to sweep ahead of us with a pole as we advanced; he made us all stop and disarmed a set of plates so we could pass. It was getting darker and I made my horn glow as did Twilight, so we could see.
We advanced with Ivan in the lead, Lady Aendyr behind him and to the right, Marcus behind him and to the left, sword in hand. Twilight was between them and Lord Aendyr and I were the rear guard. He looked rather tense, which was my own feeling too. The Crusaders have a knack for getting carried away with things.
Weird noises began to come from the ceiling, like someone was moaning rather hammily. "You okay up there?" Lady Aendyr asked, sounding worried.
"Sorry, we couldn't figure out how to get the noise machines to work, so we're having to do the wailing of the damned ourselves," Sweetie said apologetically.
"Don't undercut my wailing!," Scootaloo said, sounding irritated.
"Ghouls wail like this," Dinky said and began a really horrible loud wailing that made it hard to focus.
Which is how Ivan stepped on a pressure plate. "Dammit!" he said and now a series of panels slid open and a half dozen shambling figures stepped out of hidden wall niches. They felt intensely magical to me, and looked like sickly humans with claws instead of fingernails.
"You could let them do their own wailing," Marcus pointed out and now the three of them levelled sword, axe and hammer at the oncoming ghouls. "Don't let them touch you."
Twilight fired a barrage of lightning balls which left the ghouls staggering and twitching and then I fired arrows into the eyes of two of them. Lord Aendyr was studying them even as Lady Aendyr, Ivan, and Marcus fell on them. Marcus' sword took off the outstretched arms of one foe and Ivan smashed in the skull of a second one even as Lady Aendyr felled a third with a series of axe blows. She was laughing as she kicked that one into a fourth and then hacked him as he went down, while Marcus narrowly dodged the fifth and then kicked him down and stabbed him from behind over and over as Twilight blasted him with glowing darts in the face. "Sorry, Twilight, I left you open," Marcus apologized.
"It's okay, he would have gotten you," Twilight said.
The last ghoul tried to flee but Ivan threw his hammer at him, knocking him down and then Lady Aendyr hacked his arms off and he died. All of them crumbled into darkness and evaporated.
"Shadow creatures," Lady Aendyr said hesitantly.
"I'll just ca... oh, it's over," Lord Aendyr said, then looked embarrassed. "Yes, shadow conjurations. I would imagine young ponies would have a hard time rounding up a lot of real monsters."
"The stupid will-o-the-wisp lured us into quicksand," Twist grumbled.
"That's what they do," Lady Aendyr said. "Lure their prey into terrain which traps them so they can feed on your despair." She began cleaning her axe and Marcus his sword. "Man, I remember the first time we met ghouls, we had to run for our lives."
"You two ran, carrying me, because I got hit," Marcus said, laughing softly. "Then we got lost in the woods for a *week*."
Ivan began carefully poking the ground ahead, Twilight sallying forward with him to give him enough light. "Don't go too far forwards," Lord Aendyr said.
"I know," Ivan said. "Just doing this while the slowpokes clean up." He grinned a little.
"I'm ready," Lady Aendyr said.
Marcus finished, but his sword didn't have a proper sheen, so I polished it as well, while Ivan slowly drifted further and further forward. "Come on, slowpokes," Ivan said. "Twilight and I will take all the treasure if you don't keep up."
"Ivan, that wouldn't be nice at all!" Twilight said frantically. "We're not going to steal all the treasure!" she said, turning back to face us.
I wonder if there will be any real treasure; shadow conjuration treasure would fade away with time and the Crusaders don't have piles of it lying... where does Keraptis get his treasures? Beyond the gems, which I know he mines.
"Oh, so is this really Scootaloo in disguise?" Marcus said, laughing and starting forwards.
"I'd disguise myself as someone way cooler than Twilight," Scootaloo said. "Like Rainbow Dash! Or Princess Luna. Or Daring Doo."
"That wasn't you at the party, was it? Someone disguised themselves as Daring Doo for some reason and... I thought it was Dash," I said, embarrassed.
"Of course it wasn't me, I was CHASING the Oard, but it got away!" Scootaloo said, frustrated. "Our best lead ever and we blew it, dammit."
Of course it couldn't be her. Think clearly, Rarity, I told myself. I can't afford any mistakes.
"These devil faces... they have really strong magic," Twilight said hesitantly.
"Don't touch them, they either destroy anything that goes in the mouth or teleport you somewhere naked," Marcus said. "I think it's an imported Alphatian tradition."
"It's generally thought to have been brought back by adventurers who visited a Parallel Prime Plane," Dinky said. "Back in the time of Blackmoor. From an alternate Blackmoor. The Nithians revived it as an image of Thanatos and his all-devouring maw. Various other civilizations then found Nithian ruins and copied the concept."
Twilight grumbled about research materials and short notice.
"Looks kind of like that time Albinus had that intestinal disease," Lady Aendyr said, then laughed.
Ivan laughed too, but Marcus gagged. "Don't remind me. We couldn't... dammit, we don't have a healer in this party. And I don't have any potions any more."
"I have a half-dozen in this nifty jacket," Ivan said, sticking his hand in a pocket and pulling out a blue liquid. "Luna was kind enough to arrange to have the pockets turned into bags of holding for me."
"And I brought a couple of disease cures and healing potions on the trip, just in case," Helga said, touching her backpack.
I have a full load of material for clothing emergencies myself, but I should see about having things for this sort of situation. I felt rather underdressed.
"This is why staying out of the reach of monsters is better than rushing in to get yourself eaten and need healing," Lord Aendyr said gruffly.
"Easy to say when we're up here ensuring nothing rushes you," Ivan said, frowning and then turned back towards the direction we were going. "Anyway, let's get going."
Honestly, given it's just the Crusaders running this, if the first fight is any indication, nothing is going to hurt us really anyway.
*********************
"AAAAA!" I screamed. We had reached the first natural cave, which like all limestone, looked far too much like hardened snot. There were stalagmites and stalactites and places where they grew together and we had to walk carefully on slick stone because it was very wet. We were gradually circling the cave to get a feeling for how many exits there were; in places, patches of fungus grew somehow despite the lack of light. Unfortunately, the first tunnel was full of bats and now they had rushed us, not trying to hurt us but panicking all over us as we panicked; Lord Aendyr was screaming about bats and staggering and I kept crashing into pillars and I could feel bats using me as a toilet or snagging on my clothing and Marcus kept shouting 'Camazotz', whatever that means and I couldn't see anything but Twilight chanting and how could I see her chanting?
Lord Aendyr tried to cast a spell but the magic went wild and I felt knots of power crashing into everything and then exploding into spiders. Giant purple spiders the size of a normal pony. One jumped onto Twilight, who began rolling around with it. One tried to jump onto Lady Aendyr, who grabbed it by the front legs and began bashing it into a pillar, shouting angrily. A third knocked down Lord Aendyr, who was digging desperately in a pocket and screaming. And the fourth appeared under Marcus and fled with him stuck on top of it, yelling as it carried him into the darkness; I could hear him trying to cast a spell and shouting my name.
"Rarity, save dumbass," Ivan shouted but I couldn't see him and I wasn't sure who he meant. Probably Lord Aendyr but sometimes he does call Marcus dumbass and then they wrestle and... I couldn't find Marcus, anyway and I'm guessing Ivan sees in the dark now, though maybe I could follow the screaming.
Twilight teleported out from under her foe and lifted it into the air and began to spin it in place as it made odd, frantic chittering noises, then began to spew a purple liquid out of its mouth which stuck to things and turned into goo. This stirred me to action and I tried to flip the spider off Lord Aendyr; this only rocked it gently to my frustration but it did distract it long enough for him to pull a wand and jam it into the creature's underbelly; lighting washed over it, spreading in tendrils along its carapace and it stumbled off and now couldn't move coherently at all while Lord Aendyr rolled over and threw up breakfast, kneeling over his own vomit like he was going to... I hated that biology lesson.
I had forgotten it.
"Thank you," he said weakly to me even as Lady Aendyr took her foe, hit the one which had been on her own husband and knocked that one into Twilight's foe and they all crashed into the wall and blew up in a puff of smoke.
"Rarity, I need a clean up," Ivan said; he and Marcus stumbled out of the dark, covered in purple goo. "When this hardens, we won't be able to move."
*That* I could do. "You're welcome, Lord Aendyr," I said, then washed the gunk off Marcus and Ivan with my magic. The bats had fled, I noticed. I guess all the magic and violence panicked them.
Then I heard a rattling noise in my saddle bag; three bats came out when I opened it as I stared. They circled me once and fled into the darkness.
"Twist, you put the wild magic zone in the wrong room," Scootaloo grumbled.
"It's in the right room! Look!" Twist said.
"Thanks for the warning," Lady Aendyr said, grinning a little, then turning to her husband. "I'm sorry I didn't come help you quicker, honey but I had a dance partner."
"It's okay, I somehow summoned them with a burst of wind spell," he said, frowning. "I'm not sure what went wrong."
"Your casting got disrupted and the magic went wild," Twilight said, patting his arm with a hoof. "Happens to everyone."
"Never got attacked by spiders before, though," Marcus said, looking around and peering into the darkness though I doubt he could see anything. "Not from a spell misfire."
"You can't get wiped out until you get to where my genius will wipe you out," Scootaloo said urgently.
"You okay, Rarity?" Sweetie asked me.
"I'm fine, thank you," I told her. I don't think Sweetie is suited by nature to run a dungeon, which is for the best, really.
"Press on! We gotta finish this before our curfew," Apple Bloom said urgently. "Uncle K says it's rude to leave your guests unwatched and alone."
"Sometimes a lady does want her privacy, but I think we're ready to go on," I said, looking at everyone.
"I'm ready," Lord Aendyr said, sighing as he and his wife brushed him off. "I should have brought something darker." He was in traditional Blackhill robes, which is to say, they started as white and we may be cleaning them for a week after this.
Soon, we were ready to start exploring the rim some more.
************************
The cave had five tunnels leading away from it. I guessed that likely each of the Crusaders dreamed up what's down each tunnel; this central cave really didn't have anything dangerous or exciting once the bats were all gone. Hopefully not swarming across the countryside.
We ended up letting Lady Aendyr pick the first one; she choose the furthest left one. The tunnel began to slope down and became slicker. Twilight and I could handle it with our horseshoes, but everyone else had to slow down some to avoid slipping on the wet stone. Lord Aendyr had to grab stalactites several times and at one point, Marcus stopped moving, Twilight crashed into him from behind and he went sliding down in front of everyone, then Ivan tried to sprint up to help him, tripped and they crashed into each other and both tumbled as Lady Aendyr ran after them until Twilight lifted them both into the air just shy of an underground stream. Lord Aendyr began laughing, then nearly fell on me in the process.
"I am sorry, Countess Rarity," he said, bowing to me.
"I think you should ride me," I told him. "Until we get to where the footing is easier."
I heard Marcus make the 'disapproval but I think no one can tell' noise. When he just barely is containing his disapproval of something, he makes that noise. I'm sure sometimes he does hide it but I am getting good at seeing through his feints. Anyway, he may not like it, but it is only logical for me to do it; I am stronger than Twilight and we need to stay in the back. So I chose to ignore it because otherwise this would turn into a stupid argument.
I just wish they would get along!
I had a sudden moment of intense sympathy for Sweetie, who just wishes this all the time.
Lord Aendyr glanced at Marcus, Marcus frowned at him, then he said, "I accept your gracious offer if it will not get in the way of you performing your duties."
Lady Aendyr licked her lips, then pulled Marcus aside and talked to him quietly. Marcus sighed and nodded and Lady Aendyr nodded to me.
"It will not," I told him. "I should practice, anyway, since Marcus and I will likely want to do this together in the future."
He did not grimace as I feared, but Marcus smiled a little smile and I relaxed. One crisis averted.
But I am going to go mad if they keep wishing each other ill.
*********************
We splashed across the stream into a cave full of pools of water and even more stalactites and stalagmites. Some of the pools looked very deep, though the water tended to be kind of milky and hard to see through. Ivan kept poking away with his pole, then stopped and pointed at a stalactite. "Light that up, please."
Twilight made it glow and he studied it. It looked like an ordinary stalactite to me, but he said, "Piercer, go around it."
"If you go around it, it can't fall on someone!" Scootaloo said, sounding aggravated. "I was counting on a good laugh!"
"Don't go confirming guesses!" Apple Bloom said irritably. "Rule eight, right here, don't confirm guesses!"
I heard a hoof strike paper.
"Did Keraptis give you a Dungeon Master's Code of Conduct?" Marcus asked, amused.
There is a code of conduct? That's somewhat reassuring, really. Every profession needs standards.
"How did you know?" Apple Bloom asked and Marcus laughed more. "Don't laugh at me! I'm a big pony now!"
"Yeah, and you still haven't told us all the adult secrets even though we're grown up now," Scootaloo said.
Sweetie made an odd noise and now I could hear them all badgering her about whatever exactly she was thinking about. While they bickered, I turned to my friends. "Marcus, what makes a piercer fall?"
"They sense prey by heat, I think," Marcus said hesitantly. He looked at Twilight.
"I don't know, I got drafted at the last minute and didn't research AT ALL," she said miserably. "I am completely unprepared for this. I don't even have Spike."
"Cadence will take good care of Spike," I told her. "She seems like a very nice lady."
"Oh, she will but I guess I am used to having him here," Twilight said. "I'm going to fret about him a lot."
"Don't worry, I'll help you out all I can once you're out of the dungeon. When I'm not in school or hunting Oards or ... family stuff," Dinky said, suddenly trailing off at the end.
"Hmm..." Marcus said, then fired off a burst of flame under the piercer. It dropped down to the ground, WHACK, then dissolved away into shadows which evaporated.
"It attacks by killing itself in a fall?" Lord Aendyr said, as confused as I was.
"I'm guessing the shadow material can't handle the impact well," Marcus said. He fired bursts of flame under all the stalactites, which took a while but about half of them fell down and killed themselves.
"I HATE YOU! You ruined it!" Scootaloo said angrily. "You were supposed to run around in terror and keep running under new ones so you would get attacked again and run more! I had music ready to go and everything."
Lively saxophone music began to play.
"That was not the cue, Sweetie!" Scootaloo said irritably.
"And now I need a little rest after casting that over and over," Marcus said weakly, leaning on a stalagmite.
"I'm not Sweetie!" Twist said and now more command chamber bickering ensued.
"A real wizard wouldn't be tired from that," Lord Aendyr said cheerfully.
"A real noble wouldn't rub it in," Marcus said.
"Enough," I said firmly. "No more fighting." I looked them both in the eye as best I could.
"You're right," Marcus said, sighing. "Just give me a minute."
Ivan scouted around a little with Twilight while the rest of us stayed with Marcus. Lady Aendyr didn't quite sit down by him, just... I'm not sure how she balanced down so low, kind of doing this thing with folded legs but not sitting... They talked quietly, so I said to Lord Aendyr, "Your wife has been teaching me some magic of your people."
"Yes, not many Ponies have been initiated into our arts, though Sugar Sparkle's father is. A lot of my family is very... insular," he said after a long hesitation. "We are Alphatian in descent and our ancestors were quite sure they were the greatest of all wizards. And passed that on to their children. There's a lot of conflict between those more stuck in their ways and those who recognize that if we stay locked in our shell, the world will pass us by," he continued, then sighed. "I opened my eyes to new places and things at the Great School of Magic. But I've seen lots of new things on this trip too." His voice dropped and became soft. "Equestria is very different from my homeland, even from the Pony part of it."
"So you've been to Dream Valley?" I asked.
"Sugar Sparkle's father, Honey Crunch, went to school with me at the Great School of Magic. There was some sort of messup in records and we ended up as roommates." Lord Aendyr laughed loudly. "That was a shock for both of us."
"Did he have some kind of honey magic?" I asked curiously.
"His cutie mark let him command bees. Mostly to make him honey. Which he ate on everything," Lord Aendyr said. "And still does. He has this ultimate spell where he calls up a huge air elemental and fills it with bees."
I shivered at the thought.
"Anyway, I invited him and his wife to come but they had too much work. He normally vacations in the winter, when there's nothing to help fertilize or raid for pollen to make honey," Lord Aendyr said. Then he glanced off at Twilight and Ivan. "And he seemed... He wanted Sugar to see Equestria but seemed afraid of coming himself."
"He would have been most welcome," I told Lord Aendyr. "I understand your wife has had some problem with people who can't accept her in your land."
His face darkened and his eyes flashed. "Yes, and it angers me. Moreso because there is only so much I can do about it." He paused. "Do the different kinds of Pony intermarry in Equestria?"
"It's less common but does happen," I told him. "Scootaloo has a Pegasus parent and an Earth Pony parent. But also sometimes, though it's rare, Ponies will give birth to a different kind of Pony because of past intermarriage."
He nodded, but now Ivan said, "Dammit, I've seen this door before."
We could see him and Twilight off in the distance; I could vaguely make out a door in the wall by Twilight's horn glow. "Should we come?"
"Yeah," Ivan said and we all came over, splashing through the cave.
"That's just like the door you made for testing lockpicking," Marcus said, studying the wooden door which looked... lost, really, set into a wooden frame in the wall of the cave.
Ivan raised an eyebrow and then got out the Lockpicks of Asterius and touched them to the door, which clicked and unlocked. He poked it open with his pole.
"HEY! You're supposed to have to unlock it! After HOURS of effort!" Scootaloo said angrily.
"I *told* you," Dinky said. "I knew that would happen."
"Please, let's not have another fight!" Sweetie pleaded.
Ivan tapped the ground beyond it and now a giant pie fell into the wooden hallway beyond.
"So I added that," Dinky continued and sighed. "Stupid pole."
"Rarity, if you will?" Ivan asked.
"I can't eat pie which fell on the floor," I said.
For a few seconds, he stared at me, then said, "I meant your cleaning magic."
"Oh," I said, now embarrassed. I soon had the mess cleaned up and we headed into the wooden hallway.
*****************
This hallway led us to a thirty foot cube room with the exits halfway up the walls and strange bears with mantis heads rappelling down the walls to attack us.
Our staring at the strange sight let the first wave hit the floor and then the battle began in earnest. Lady Aendyr charged one of them, battering him back with the flat of her axe, then hacking at him as he stumbled around. Ivan smacked a second in the head, knocking him back and Marcus held off his foe with his sword, each alternately stabbing and dodging. Twilight seized two of them with her magic and hurled them back the way we came in; I heard them land in a pool and then they began yelping and running around as that music played again. I shot the antenna off two of them and they began to wander around, disoriented and I nudged them to wander back out into the cave with the others.
"Well, at least someone is getting hit in the head," Scootaloo muttered as I heard one of the creatures get hit by a piercer we must have missed.
Lord Aendyr finally finished the spell and sent a glowing blade flying around the room, cutting ropes and causing more of the strange insect-bears to fall down and dissolve away. "A definite weakness."
"Dammit, Uncle K's monsters don't die from a short fall," Apple Bloom grumbled.
"I'm pretty sure bugbears aren't mantis-bear hybrids, either," Twist said.
"The ones on Epsilon Kappa are," Dinky said firmly.
"How do you know what they're like in another star system?" Twilight asked as she set Marcus' foe on fire with his own spell and it dissolved away.
"I've been there," Dinky said.
Dinky makes many wild claims like that but has no proof. I think it's the imagination of youth.
That was easy but then, the Crusaders aren't really trying to kill us. At least in theory. I hope they know what they're doing.
"Hmm, Ivan, you can climb up to one of the doors and pull me up, right?" Lady Aendyr said to him. "Then I can lift everyone up."
"I can get us up there," Lord Aendyr said proudly. "Everyone get close to Countess Rarity and myself."
Everyone gathered around us; I noticed that Marcus didn't protest this, and gave a sigh of relief. Maybe it's a good sign. Then he began a long rite and the air under us began to swirl and then we lifted a touch off the ground and the air seemed to almost solidify and the platform lifted us up to one of the three exits.
"Almost as good as my spell, almost," Dinky said like a father clumsily praising his child. A mother, given Dinky is a filly.
Ivan checked out the tunnel and we stepped into it, once he approved.
"I can never make that work," Lady Aendyr said ruefully.
"With time you will," Lord Aendyr said. "I could only lift myself originally." He let out a great sigh. "That's the most weight I've ever lifted, in fact."
He and Twilight now began a technical discussion which flew over my head. But which I could not avoid while carrying him. So I listened politely and watched for trouble as Ivan and Lady Aendyr and Marcus led us on.
****************
The hallway soon began to be decorated with pictures of fire elementals doing things like burning the homework of Ponies, forcing them to grow carrots, making them go to bed when the adults stayed up, and other such themes. I had to fight not to laugh very hard at it.
"How... Does this happen often here?" Lord Aendyr asked hesitantly.
"Sweetie made us censor it," Scootaloo grumbled.
Marcus, Ivan, and Lady Aendyr froze in unison. "STOP," Marcus said urgently. They stopped advancing.
Twilight crashed into him AGAIN and he fell down. "Marcus! I'm sorry!"
"Do you think...?" Lady Aendyr asked Marcus.
"Can you light up the end of the hallway?" Ivan asked Twilight as he helped Marcus up.
"Yes," she said and the end of the hallway glowed brightly, showing doors of beaten brass, inset with fancy inlaid red, yellow, and orange jade, showing a huge bonfire. If you looked carefully, you could see salamanders dancing in the fire.
Marcus' left hand clenched and unclenched and Ivan began to laugh softly, while Lady Aendyr buried her face in her hands. "The Temple of Elemental Evil was in those magazines, I take it?" Ivan said.
"Sal... oh dear." Twilight said, looking at Marcus.
Lord Aendyr began to laugh loudly.
"There's going to be braziers past this door, ten of them and EACH of them is going to spawn a damn Salamander. The firey elemental kind," Marcus said. "There may be a priest by the altar at the far end and there's a chest which is trapped to hell and BACK."
"That was a sweet sword in it, though," Lady Aendyr said appreciatively.
"Yeah, I guess Faisal still has it," Marcus said. "I... didn't forget him dying, right?" he said weakly.
"He died twice but we had him raised," Lady Aendyr said. "But no, he retired once he had enough money for the coffee shop he always wanted." She sighed. "He probably uses Frostrazor to chop carrots or something."
"DAMN CARROTS!" Scootaloo shouted.
"Did you have too much coffee?" I asked her. She's jumpier than usual.
"No, I'm drinking lemonade," Scootaloo said.
"I got rid of the coffee," Twist said. "Lemonade's tastier anyway."
"Wait, Frostrazor was a sword?" Apple Bloom said.
Marcus rubbed his forehead. "Yes, a two-handed sword made of enchanted ice which froze things it hit. So chopping carrots with it wouldn't go too well, I think."
"But I bet you could make some great ice cream with it," Ivan said thoughtfully. "Which in Ylarum would sell like crazy."
"I can make ice cream if I had some milk and sugar," Lord Aendyr said. "Honey Crunch and I worked out a spell for it to combine our powers back in school." He sounded oddly sentimental.
"So this place is going to be full of fire magic," I said thoughtfully.
"And damn Salamanders," Marcus said, shivering.
"Assuming they copied it perfectly," Lady Aendyr said.
"Well, I have some fire protection magic," Twilight said, giving a happy sigh. "It's one of the first things I learned after getting Spike."
"Did he set something on fire?" Lady Aendyr asked.
"The laundry. He was still a baby and he burped and it all burned," Twilight said ruefully. "He hasn't set the laundry on fire in a long time but I am surrounded by flammables all the time. I regret it isn't a permanent effect, so I could treat the library with it and stop worrying about it."
She then proceeded to cast a spell on us; I tried to watch her but I couldn't quite keep up with it despite seeing the flows of magic. Twilight really is a great wizard.
Each of us glowed a soft red now from our protection as Ivan poked at the door. A half dozen times and it wouldn't open until Lord Aendyr reached out and... pulled the door open. It opened towards us.
Lady Aendyr laughed and now we could see into a long grand hall with many images of fire on the walls; ten huge pots of fire went down the middle of the room in two rows of fire; at the far end, a huge red sandstone altar squatted below a statue of a humanoid figure made out of fire. There were three red gold knives on the altar, next to a large copper bowl.
But no sign of Salamanders, though Marcus said they would be in the braziers.
And no sign of a priest or a chest.
"Hmm, I think it's time to put out the fires before approaching the altar," Twilight said.
Lady Aendyr studied everything, studied her aura, breathed in and out, then said, "I can try and put out the fires with some wind."
"We're going to be ass-deep in salamanders as soon as we attack the braziers," Marcus said. "I can try hurling water balls into them. I think I have that spell down."
"If Rarity and I combine our abilities, I think we can rain down water on all the braziers at the same time," Twilight said. "While Marcus and Ivan and Lady Aendyr stand ready to fight and... Lord Aendyr can work with us."
Lord Aendyr looked worried but then he breathed out. "Agreed."
Marcus shifted back and forth on his feet. "Damn salamanders."
"It'll be okay," Lady Aendyr said, patting his shoulder. "You ready, Ivan, Marcus?"
"Always," Ivan said, taking his hammer by the strap, ready for throwing.
Twilight and I reached out with our horns; Lord Aendyr cast a spell I did not know and it connected him to us. Ten balls of water, ringed by winds, rushed at the braziers dousing them; ten red-scaled humanoids... sort of humanoids... Salamanders are like the snake equivalent of a centaur with the rear half a red-scaled snake and the front mostly human in shape, though with big pointed ears and red scales.
They were armed with strange spears, red and slightly shiny but not metallic, twisted in a tight spiral like a corkscrew with a half-dozen javelins of the same style in quivers on their backs.
And the air smelled like wet licorice.
"Feel the power of fire-hardened candy!" Twist said proudly.
I now wondered if they were edible.
"At least Brannart is unlikely to show up," Marcus mumbled and then the battle was joined.
The ten angry Salamanders threw a barrage of javelins at us. I shot four of them out of the sky and felt quite proud, even as Lord Aendyr extended his wind armor to shield both of us; I began to feel a little cold from constant rushing wind but now we were quite safe inside it. Two more came at Lady Aendyr and skidded off her wind armor spell and crashed into the wall, shattering. Marcus desperately dodged two which came at him and now was running around the room, yelling as two Salamanders chased him, hurling javelins. Two hurled javelins at Ivan, who dodged them and counter-threw Whelm, smacking one of them in the chest and knocking him down; he still had his spear but his javelins shattered on the impact with the ground. Then the hammer came back to Ivan.
Twilight paused and began casting some spell, frowning, while Lord Aendyr began thinking hard. I began aiming counter-battery fire at the four who were hurling at Lord Aendyr and I, keeping them on the run so they couldn't fire at us. 'What are you two trying to figure out?'
'None of them attacked me and I don't know why but it makes me suspicious,' Twilight told me.
'Trying to remember if they have any special weaknesses beyond water, but I took that class many years ago,' Lord Aendyr said, brows furrowed.
"MY ASS!" Marcus shouted as he got knocked into the altar by a hurled javelin. Which.. well, you can tell where he got hit.
I shot the straps of one of his foe's quiver, causing it to fall off his back, while missiles at us bounced off our wind shield and Lord Aendyr tugged his ears and mumbled under his breath, eyes unfocused.
Lady Aendyr launched herself in a charge at the two who were shelling her. Things didn't go as well as she planned, though, as one dodged to the side and whacked the back of her knees, knocking her down as the other parried her axe attack barely. She tumbled towards Marcus.
Ivan now nailed his other foe in the chest; he fell and broke his Javelins but now the first one slithered at him on the ground and rose up around Ivan, twining him in its coils, knocking aside Whelm when it tried to return to him.
"Fancy meeting you here," Lady Aendyr said as she crashed into the altar. It shook and the bowl flipped off, landing on her head like a helm.
"Very stylish," Marcus said, rising with her as four salamanders closed in on them and they stood... not quite back to back but making a triangle with the altar as their rear guard. It would protect them from attack from behind. Clever.
"DESECRATORS OF MY ALTAR, YOU FIVE WILL PERISH IN FIRE," the statue announced.
"SIX! SIX!" Twilight insisted. "I'm here too."
"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were coming and I think I programmed them too rigidly, I'm not used to this, I'm really sorry," Twist said frantically. "I didn't mean to be rude and leave you out."
"I REMEMBER HOW YOU TURNED MY HIGH PRIEST INTO A DUCK AND THEN PUT ON HIS ROBES AND MOCKED ME IN MY OWN TEMPLE, CUFEN," the statue continued.
"He was evil and trying to kill us! He had it coming!" Marcus protested. "Evil Immortals don't get to complain when they lose!"
Lord Aendyr made panicky noises and cast a spell, then said, "It's not the real Imix, just a shadow creature." But he still eyed it nervously.
Twilight teleported onto the altar. "Time for your BATH!" She began hurling balls of water and Imix... Shadow-Imix counter-fired with balls of fire and soon thick steam began to engulf the far end of the room.
Four salamanders began to close on Lord Aendyr and I, having abandoned throwing things at us.
Ivan concentrated, then cursed. "There's too much fire, I can't touch the Plane of Shadow here!" Then he made gurgly noises as he got crushed, his arms pinned. The other Salamander stood by, ready to attack Ivan but unable to do so because his friend's body was in the way, crushing Ivan.
"Darien, save Ivan!" Lady Aendyr said, then began fending off her foes even as Marcus did the same and hot steam flowed over both of them, hiding them from us.
"HELGA!" Lord Aendyr shouted in a panic.
"Spike, take a... dammit, Spike isn't here!" Twilight said, turning from excited to angry. I couldn't see her in the fog but I could hear the chaos within it.
I bolted towards Ivan, away from our onrushing foes and tried to think of a spell or way to get him loose before it was too late. 'Can you cast a darkness spell?' I asked him.
He tried but the fire and light dispelled it in a moment and he cursed. He tried a wind blast but it just knocked them both around, making it worse for Ivan and now Lord Aendyr gave a cry of frustration. And now we had FIVE salamanders after us and I was running out of room to move as the battle raged on in the growing fog.
If Ivan had some darkness, but magical... ahah! I felt proud of myself as I yanked a long length of red cloth out of my saddlebags, lifted it into the air and dumped it down over Ivan and his foe, hiding them from all the glittering surfaces in the room. Creating... DARKNESS. Totally mundane but it was enough; when the cloth burned up, there was only the Salamander and now Ivan appeared in the doorway from the hallway. "Thanks, Rarity," he said.
"Now you can help us," I told him. Neither of us are really hand-to-hand fighters and without anyone to cover us, we were in trouble. I can scrap if I must but not with a rider.
Another door now opened and a red-robed priest, armed with a long blue-ice blade, charged out. "CUFEN! THIS IS MY REVENGE!"
No, not more foes! I could hear Scootaloo and Apple Bloom making excited noises, while Sweetie sounded worried. And I could hear pages flipping. "Don't go adding more foes constantly," I protested.
"Just doing a little research," Dinky said calmly over the com system.
Lord Aendyr snapped off a spell; a whirlwind hit the priest, who lost control of his blade; it flew through a Salamander, who dissolved away into quickly vanishing shadows. Then Lord Aendyr seized it with more magic and began rotating it around us; our foes kept a wary distance, clearly afraid of it, as the priest now tried to rush at us to grab it. I used my magic and tied him up with his own robes, then sent him rolling back the way he came.
Ivan now charged to our aid, bashing down another salamander and breaking his spear and knocking him out; he evaporated and now we had four. Two of them came at him while I shot arrows at a third and the fourth tried to duel Frostrazor but Lord Aendyr now made wind rise under him and slammed him into the ceiling. "Yeah!" he said proudly, then re-directed Frostrazor to aid Ivan. Soon all our foes were down.
The steam now dispersed. Marcus, Twilight and Lady Aendyr were all dripping wet and their clothing was in tatters. Well, Twilight only had her saddlebags. But Marcus was down to mere scraps of clothing and Lady Aendyr was basically in her underwear and backpack, except that the neck of her shirt was still intact. They also looked somewhat baked, though Ivan threw Marcus a potion and Lady Aendyr got one from her pack; they chugged them down and their skin returned to healthier tones. Lord Aendyr dismounted and ran to his wife and I nuzzled Marcus.
"Are you okay?" Lord Aendyr asked.
"I've had much worse," Lady Aendyr said, kissing him and embracing. "However, I need new clothing." She looked at me.
"Me too," Marcus said.
"Of course, we can take a break here and I will make new outfits." That was ugly.
"There's a chest hidden inside the altar," Ivan said, pointing Whelm at it. "Twilight and I can crack its defenses while Rarity dresses you two up."
"I will help if I can," Lord Aendyr said hesitantly.
Ivan studied him, then said, "Be careful, this thing is trapped to hell and back if it's like the original one. And you're not experienced in this kind of thing and if you blow up, Helga's going to be pissed at me."
"If I can't go where she goes, I can't ask her to go where I go," Lord Aendyr said, studying the altar now.
Ivan stared at him, made an odd noise, then said, "Done much work with wards?"
I nuzzled Lord Aendyr. "You're doing fine," I told him reassuringly, then worried I had been too forward.
He blinked, then patted my head weakly. "Thank you, Countess Rarity." He turned back to Ivan. "I am versed in keeping Elementals out of things and using Air Elementals to ward things, along with basic magical security."
"If you can circle the altar with some kind of anti-Elemental ward, that would be a good start," Ivan said.
He began slowly etching the symbols with Twilight while I turned to making clothing for Marcus and Lady Aendyr. It would have to be a rush job. But I perform well under pressure.
"Hurry up and blow up, watching people scratch the rock is *boring*," Scootaloo said.
I had all of the whale dress prototypes... but I couldn't inflict those on Lady Aendyr. I would have to modify them anyway.
But black and white... yes...
I was half finished when they finished ringing the Altar; you could see everything inside the circle stop glowing with fire energy and now Ivan borrowed Marcus' sword and began cutting the Altar open.
"The door's on the side," Twist said hesitantly.
"Which is why I'm avoiding it," Ivan said, removing the panel of stone. Twilight now pulled the chest out and set it atop the Altar. The three of them disarmed it as Lady Aendyr and Marcus traded memories of the old days and got suited up by me.
"Tell me we didn't leave Allistair as a statue forever," Marcus said, rubbing his forehead.
"That was the start of the series of quests to pay for the last quest's ending," Lady Aendyr said, shaking her head. "Finally, we were all okay, and then Cindi lost all our money gambling."
Ivan made grumbly noises; something began to glow near him and Twilight burned it. "Thanks, Twilight," he said. "Don't reminisce so loudly when I'm dealing with stupid numbers of traps."
"HAHHAHAHAHA," Scootaloo began to chortle. "Now you know how it feels."
"So you've forgotten a lot of it," Lady Aendyr said to Marcus.
"It's easier to remember with you here," Marcus said, studying the floor as I fitted his new shirt. "I've missed you a lot, you know."
"Me too," Lady Aendyr said, then sighed. "Of course, you *could* visit."
"Maybe next summer or during the winter when school is out," Marcus said, lifting his arms at my command. "While I'm teaching, I can't really go anywhere."
"School is totally boring," Scootaloo said.
"I like school," Twist replied and they all began bickering about school while I tried to avoid jabbing my coltfriend with pins and Ivan finally asked Twilight to cast a silence spell around them so he didn't have to listen.
"You should be grateful. There are no schools in Karameikos for children," Lady Aendyr said loudly to the kids. "I couldn't read at your age, I'd never been more than ten miles from home and I didn't know *anything* except how to grow potatoes and wheat."
"And chop things," Marcus pointed out, smiling a little.
"And how to cut wood and burn it, yes, but who doesn't know that?" Lady Aendyr said.
"I've never cut wood," Twist said.
"Me neither," Sweetie said.
"Or me," Scootaloo confessed.
"That's because you all are lazy town people," Apple Bloom said irritably. "I had to chop wood today. With my tail!"
"I've seen wood chop itself," Dinky said proudly. ...
"I can burn it, though! I help run the ovens and everything at home," Twist said proudly.
Ivan finally finished the chest and opened it with his lockpicks. Carefully he opened it and found...
Several dozen candies, carefully wrapped. Very tasty but... well, candy.
Ivan stared, mouth open.
"My finest candy! There is no greater treasure!" Twist said proudly.
Ivan buried his face in his hands and Marcus made choking sounds, while Lady Aendyr laughed loudly. "Thank you, Twist."
But then, it is the Crusaders. They don't have great treasures to hand out, though... "Where did you get Frostrazor?"
"Uncle K threw it in with some of the dungeon building gear, and some other neat stuff too. A real dungeon needs real treasure, he said," Apple Bloom said. "Also, I gave him ten barrels of cider for it all."
"I hope AJ knows you did that," Marcus said.
Apple Bloom laughed nervously. Oh dear.
******************
We were somewhat lost, having had to run away from a pack of Leucrotta, strange badger/stag crossbreeds with an added power to subvert your mind with their whisperings, which is why one of them is now wearing Marcus' hat, much to his aggravation. But there were too many of them and now we were running through room after room; luck or maybe the pity of the Crusaders kept us from being killed and when we fell down a chute, the Leucrotta finally lost us.
We now landed inside this giant spinning chamber full of clothing and proceeded to tumble around inside it while it tried to bake us alive. Twilight managed to cast her fire protection spell again or we would have been in serious trouble. Finally, though, it stopped tumbling and began making this awful buzzing noise.
The clothing was quite odd; it was all full body suits with shirts and pants attached to each other and weird clamps to hook on... footwear, I assume. None was present. It had many pockets and was made of shiny material of various colors: blue, black, green, red, white, and yellow.
When the top of the huge spinning box we were in opened, giant golems began taking out the clothing and sorting it into huge baskets. We managed to ride out by clinging to clothing, which was easier for everyone who was not me. However, Twilight just lifted me out.
The whole room was a giant mechanized laundry run by golden golems; the chute we'd fallen into now discharged more wet laundry into the machine.
"These look like the suits from the Beagle," Twilight said, eyes wide.
"Beagle, darling?" I asked, confused.
"Holy shit, this is duplicating part of the Beagle?" Marcus said, clearly shocked.
"It's from the Warden, to be precise," Dinky said. "If you were on the Beagle, you'd have its rearing dog logo, whereas you'll notice the shield symbol over the heart."
Each outfit did have such a logo but also a second log; each color had its own logo, I soon noticed. I snagged some of the outfits for later study; they gave me ideas.
There was a loud chime and now voices began to speak in a language even Twilight didn't know. Not well, anyway. "Something about intruders," she said hesitantly.
The golems all turned and looked at us.
"That is US," Lord Aendyr said and soon had us all flying towards the door on a pillar of air as giant golems fired at us and we dodged desperately. Twilight began firing lighting at them, but they seemed resistant and fire and water balls rolled off them too.
However, the door into this room was only ten feet tall and we flew down and ran out it; the golems, I noticed, could not fit through the door. Or the giant laundry baskets.
We fled down a long metal hallway; I was impressed by how much the Crusaders had built and a little worried how they could build it all so quickly.
But for now, I focused on running as more but smaller golden golems poured through the doorways after us.
*********************
We managed to lose the golems by jumping through a portal, which put us in a long ten foot wide hallway which led into a ninety foot by ninety foot square room with a twenty foot ceiling; another hallway led out of the room via the left wall of the room and by the far wall was a sarcophagus of some long dead Nithian pharaoh; he'd inscribed himself into the lid, holding his staff and... the other thing. Crook? A flail? Anyway, Twilight said, "I doubt that's the real Jozer, but it looks like him."
In addition, there were sixteen bugbears (the normal ones, not half-insect/half-bear monstrosities), all in various combat poses, not moving at all, sprinkled randomly around the room.
"Could be a chess puzzle," Ivan said thoughtfully.
"But they don't have any accessories to indicate which is which piece and there's no grid," Lady Aendyr said, studying the whole thing. "Probably they all just come to life and attack when you disturb the sarcophagus."
"Not a place you've been?" Lord Aendyr asked her.
"We haven't been everywhere, though I guess we did get around a lot," Lady Aendyr said, sighing. "Sorry, honey."
"There were no bugbears in Nithia," Twilight said, frowning. "It breaks vermillisitude."
"Well, I just copied the journal," Sweetie said apologetically. "This isn't one of my better ones but we were in a hurry."
"The one where you have to sing your way out is much better," Twist said.
"Don't go dumping spoilers!" Scootaloo protested. "Rainbow Dash never dumps spoilers."
"Rainbow Dash spoils EVERYTHING the second she learns it," Twist said chidingly. "The second she reads one of the Daring Doo books, she tells everyone on Mystara what happened. Before I can read it myself."
Twilight felt out the room and said, "Ahh, they're in temporal stasis. Each time someone passes through the doorway, four of them wake up."
"I have the perfect idea. If everyone rides in my saddlebags, we can all enter at once and only wake up four," I said, feeling proud of myself.
"Hey! That's not the answer!" Sweetie protested.
"Well, what is?" I asked.
"You have to..." The sounds of Sweetie being prevented from talking now broke out over the PA along with a lot of shouting.
We decided to follow my plan, though Lady Aendyr just rode me in so she could deploy to cover the others climbing out. The four charged us, but she took one out with her first swing and pinned two more in a duel but I had to dodge the fourth with Ivan hanging half-in and half-out of my saddlebag, making motion sickness noises as he whipped out; Twilight teleported out and hurled the one charging me away so I could stop and let the others out, then flung the two on Lady Aendyr at a wall.
They all now charged at the doorway for some... oh dear. Before we could stop them, they ran through the door in a line, waking up all the others.
I will never remember the rest of that fight clearly; someone shoved a sack over my head and I panicked, flinging things everywhere and shouting about monkeys and kicking anything that got too close. I heard a lot of thumping and shouting and bashing and Lord Aendyr screaming about morningstars have nothing to do with the morning.
Finally, Twilight pulled the sack off my head and I calmed down and there were evaporating bugbears everywhere and Marcus and Lord Aendyr were lying on the ground breathing hard, next to each other until they saw the other and rolled on their sides to not look at each other. There was no body in the coffin, just thousands of copper coins and several thousand silver. Four gems caught my eye: a ruby, an agate, a moonstone and an amethyst. There was also a flat piece of metal with a circle at one end, just the right size to lie flat on Ivan's palm.
Ivan began slowly shoving coins in his left pocket and then Twilight helped him with magic; I took the gems and Ivan passed the flat metal object to Marcus who studied it with Lady Aendyr.
"Magical key," Marcus said. He looked at Lady Aendyr, who nodded. "Probably to the exit from the dungeon."
"Collect them all!" Apple Bloom said proudly.
I watched Ivan dump coins; it's going to take forever to stack all those to take to the bank. At least I can buy some nice cloth with my cut; I used up a lot of my best fabric on the outfits for the visit.
And then it was time to move on.
*****************
I began to wonder how long we'd been in here. We do need to get enough sleep for the trip tomorrow. "Sweetie, honey, what time is it?" I asked her.
"Granny Smith's calling us for dinner, but we'll be back soon as we can," she said.
"I am starving," Lord Aendyr said. "I think it's time for us to go home and have dinner."
"Well, umm.. we kind of teleport blocked it so you'll have to make your way back unless you get the keys," Sweetie said, laughing nervously. "I think we may have overdone it."
"We'll be back as soon as we finish dinner," Apple Bloom said. "We can save the rest for another time. I'll figure out something."
And then we heard them gallop off.
We were in a room which had been full of traps but now was just a stone room with three exits. "Hmm, I can try and summon some food," Twilight said but to her frustration, it didn't work. Probably the same reason she can't just teleport out.
"I'm surprised they have wards which work on my level of power," Twilight said and reached out with her magic studying it.
A chime went off. "No cheating," the voice of Keraptis now said and suddenly the floor opened and we all tumbled down three different chutes; I went rolling along with Lord Aendyr, and saw Ivan and Twilight go down one and Marcus and Lady Aendyr. We tumbled until we landed on a pile of mattresses in a room full of abandoned mattresses. It wasn't very dangerous but it was hard to get around because my hooves kept driving through the mattress covers. Lord Aendyr finally lifted me with his magic and got me to the nice stone hallway which soon opened into a natural cave.
"Great, my wife's stuck with the doombringer," Lord Aendyr grumbled.
"Marcus is not a doombringer," I said sharply. "He is not going to let her get hurt if he can help it. She's important to him, you know. And him to her."
"I know," he said, staring off across the cavern. "She's been very excited to make this trip ever since you invited her. She really likes you."
"I like her too. And we both... would at least like you and Marcus to not chew on each other. I know you can't just will yourself to like someone but this constant hostility is driving us both crazy." I tried to be firm without being too pushy, since I have... he doesn't have to listen to me.
You'd think after being apart for so long, they'd get over it. I hope Spike gets over it while he's off with Cadence, but if these two can't let go after years... But I won't give up. I can at least try here in ways I can't with Spike, since it's all about me with him but not with Marcus and Lord Aendyr.
I hoped I might have more luck with him than I did with Marcus.
"How can you love someone who is always surrounded by death and devastation?" Lord Aendyr asked me, sounding baffled. "Chaos follows him everywhere. I met him when I was trying to go buy some dinner and he comes running down the street, screaming, being chased by a half dozen cockatrices. Even in Glantri City, that's unusual. I didn't react fast enough and I would have been turned to stone if not for Helga picking me up as she ran by and saving me. It's how we met." His voice was distant and hard to read. "He and Ivan ruined our first date by first following us and then getting themselves busted for some kind of expired license problem and Helga worried about them the rest of the night and had to go bail them out."
"I met Marcus when he and Ivan were about to drown in a river in the Malpheggi Swamp and we pulled them out," I told Lord Aendyr. "I never expected to fall in love with him. He was not at all the sort of stallion I had fallen for before." I paused, rethinking. "Well, he had one thing in common with the best of them. He was hugely charming. He treated me as the lady I had always dreamed of being. He looked rough but he was a gentleman. Still, it gradually crept up on me. It was only around the time we returned to Equestria that I could admit it to myself fully."
I stepped into the cave finally and we talked as we began to circle the walls, trying to see what ways led out and if we could find a tunnel back the ways I think the others went.
"I was mad for her within minutes of us meeting. That smile... she has the most natural smile. There is no pretense in anything she does. When she loves, she loves and when she hates, she hates and her smile is never pasted on and neither is her anger. My family... we tend to all be tightly controlled and we're always acting, even with each other a lot of the time. Being what nobles must be, doing what nobles must do." His hand trailed along the wall as we went. "Helga is my truth in the middle of lies and fronts and posturing." He sighed. "I suppose I must sound as if Glantri is hell. It's not, or I would leave. But it makes demands and with her, I am freed of those demands."
My hooves splashed in little puddles. These natural caves are all so wet. And filthy. I suddenly became keenly aware that my forelegs were rather filthy from splashing water and I forced myself clean with magic, knowing it would soon get dirty again.
Why must the world be that way?
"She loves you very much; just from her letters, I know that," I told him.
"I still don't know why," he said softly. "Why me, of all people."
I nearly tripped at that. "You're married and you don't know why she loves you?" How is that even possible?
"A woman like her could have any man. I mean, she's told me why she loves me but there's a million people like me and only one of her," he said urgently. "I am not someone who women normally fall in love with." Then he mumbled something about Marcus.
"If she wanted him, she could have had him long before she ever met you or he met me," I told him. It can't just... Do they just never talk about how they feel to each other? She practically gushes in her letters to me.
"I... what? No, I have no fear of that," he said firmly, hand still trailing on the wall, though his fingertips had to be stained with fungus and mold by now. "It's that he's going to get her hurt or killed. Everyone around him suffers disasters and he sails on, untouched and uncaring. He's a bird of ill omen, a dead albatross, a disaster, a... I can't think of the right metaphor," he said in frustration. Frostrazor, floating along in the air after him, carried by a little whirlwind for him, now bobbed about as if mirroring his emotions. Maybe it was. "I fear he will doom you one day and run."
"Marcus never abandons those he cares about," I said firmly. "He is afraid sometimes, so afraid." I shivered in memory. "But he would not abandon even you, who hates him, for Lady Aendyr's sake. He loves her, I know. Like a sister."
"I wouldn't drag my sister into deadly situations and I don't even like her very much," Lord Aendyr said, frowning. "Haven't you heard all their stories this whole trip about people turning to stone and getting eaten and having to be rescued from the Quasi-Elemental Plane of Ice?"
"She wants to be here," I told him. "I think she misses it sometimes. The old days."
I think I missed the Plane of... there's a Plane of Ice?
I fear I will have to find time to study more metaphysics, especially if we become Immortal. The very idea boggles me, I will confess. I cannot let Twilight go alone or Marcus too but I never dreamed that large.
But there is no Immortal dedicated to fashion, so I definitely know what my niche will be. Some of the Immortals dress as if Snips and Snails picked out their outfits. While drunk and half-asleep. Not that colts their age should ever be drunk.
Admittedly, it's a lot harder for Ponies to get drunk than humans. I believe it has to do with body mass. But I never seek to get drunk, anyway. It isn't elegant.
He gently rapped the wall with a fist, and then sighed deeply. "You've done a lot of this sort of thing, right? Dungeons?"
"No, I have had some adventures, but I think Lady Aendyr and Marcus have had twenty times as many. Or more. I had never been in a full-blown dungeon until I met Marcus," I told him.
Now he made a noise and rapped the wall again. "Well, we're doing fine so far." But I could feel his legs tense up, though his face was calm.
"Do not worry. I have survived White Plume Mountain and this place was created by children." It's hard for me to be sure how dangerous this place really is. More than I expected, but we've handled it. But still, I am ready to go home and just have a quiet evening and get ready for tomorrow in Canterlot.
Or at least eat, as I didn't bring any food and now I am starving.
It doesn't help knowing the Crusaders are eating right now.
"Created by the children to challenge five of us at a time," he said softly.
My nerves jangled but I put on my war face. I have to be strong for both of us. "We can handle it. We are nobles and wizards." I am sort of noble. Sort of a wizard. I have a title, but I don't feel noble.
He sighed and straightened up. "Yes, but you know as well as I how much of nobility is a front. Inside, you know better. I am not indestructible. I don't know everything." He paused. "Now I cannot help but remember the time Dona Carlotta tried to be a waitress." He began laughing loudly.
"Why?" I asked in confusion.
"She and Marcus were seeing each other when I started seeing Helga. After Marcus turned my poor Monsters' Fair party into a travesty, they and Ivan tried to make it up to me by ensuring that Helga and I would have a perfect date. Which they completely destroyed by their efforts to help." He grumbled to himself. "I *told* him it was a costume party, but he panicked anyway... Lady Jerbat will probably never forgive me or him for throwing all that holy water on her." He buried his face in his hands.
"This happened on the date?" I asked, confused.
"No, no, we went to Helga's favorite restaurant, a wonderful sea food place in the style of Sind. And Dona Carlotta tried to disguise herself and be our waitress, to ensure we got the best service. But she had no experience waitressing and became completely overwhelmed and then one of the customers... well, he touched her posterior and Marcus, who had been... I don't know where. He freaked out and everything went to hell and none of us are allowed within 100 feet of it now." He sighed.
I couldn't help but laugh. "A lady's posterior is something not to be touched without permission," I said. "And I know he loved her deeply." I wish he would be nicer to Herr Otto, though. "And don't say it."
"She's only angry with him because he didn't tell her who he was when he first saw her again. Not because he left her and I can't understand that," Lord Aendyr said, sounding confused.
We finally reached a tunnel; it seemed to go the right way, heading upwards; it was... I think someone widened a natural tunnel. "Shall we?" I asked him.
"Sure, I have no idea where to go," he confessed.
"They chose to break up for fear of her mother," I told him. "He didn't abandon her. But he didn't have to lie to her later. That's why she's angry." I understand why he did it. He lied to all of us but... his fears were too great. But I understand them. He was so hurt when he met us. Slowly worn away like the rocks under a waterfall. He is stronger now.
And having Lady Aendyr here makes him stronger. I can see how they had so many adventures together. I wonder if Twilight and Fluttershy and I and everyone come off like that too. I know we've all changed from our adventures. Grown closer. They are sisters to me now, dear to me. Even when we fight. But sisters do that sometimes.
We started up the tunnel, him still trailing a hand on the wall, me moving carefully because the stone was wet. "If only we had some way to track them, but my divination magics aren't really good for finding people. If they were books..." He laughed softly.
"Books... Twilight must be carrying some," I told him. "Do you have to have a specific title?"
"I need a topic," he said.
Hmm... "History."
He chanted and waved his arms and I felt the spell go off. "Hmm, the way we're going. So it could be her or a trap." He sighed.
"Keep it up; we'll see if it guides us."
We'll see.
***************
It led us to a room with three more tunnels leading out and a high vaulted ceiling. There was a chest by one wall, apparently unguarded but probably locked and trapped. I assumed.
No sign of magical wards. Sending a small air elemental didn't trigger any traps. Warily, we drew closer to it; I wondered if 'paranoia' was one of its traps.
I opened it remotely with telekinesis; nothing happened but you could see a jumble of gold and silver coins in the chest. "It has to be a trap but it's not an illusion or anything," Lord Aendyr said, frowning.
We slowly grew closer and I lifted a few coins out and still nothing happened. We crept closer and then...
The wall smashed open and a huge ochre creature broke through the wall; it was like a cross between a human, a lobster, and an ant with huge segmented eyes, huge manibles around its mouth and a hideous roar. Multicolored light rushed out of its eyes at us and I panicked, fleeing down one of the tunnels with the creature in hot pursuit as Lord Aendyr shouted about crumpets.
There was a curtain of beads, huge beads the size of an apple... the shape of apples too, but clearly made out of various colors of pearl. But I didn't care, just shoved them out of the way and fled through the room, crashing into a barrel being used for a dice game by six hyena-headed humanoids with spears and a seventh, taller one armed with a strange set of three metal rods, connected by short lengths of chain. They would have attacked us, but by the time they hefted their weapons and the dice stopped flying around the room, the huge lobster-ant-man crashed into the room and we left them to fight each other as I fled on screaming and Lord Aendyr cursed someone named Margle for stealing his crumpets.
******************
There was a room like a chessboard, full of human-sized chess pieces but I just raced through it as things blew up and the ground tried to zap me and the pieces tried to attack me and Lord Aendyr randomly blasted everything that caught his attention; wind whipped through the room and I leaped THROUGH the door at the far end.
A hallway led us into a jungle, where weird purple-faced monkeys threw cocoanuts at us with their minds. Twilight would have been fascinated, I was just terrified and I ran and dodged and parried with my magic and threw a whale dress prototype in the face of one of them and Lord Aendyr shouted about how the trees were full of evil elves and they wouldn't have his sugar.
Then we tumbled down a slope into a lake and finally snapped out of it as we rose, sodden, in the water, which came about halfway up my torso. "Please forget everything I just did," Lord Aendyr said, trying to squeeze out his clothing.
"I agree that we will never speak of this again," I told him, looking around the cave. It stretched maybe a hundred feet out to three exits, two of which were rivers feeding into the lake. I decided to head for the dry one.
However, of course, electric eels decided to attack us and we soon were running around desperately dodging them, though once we got across the room, we managed to fling them into the walls with our magics. There wasn't even any proper treasure. And still no sign of the Crusaders coming back from dinner.
We pressed on to a spiral staircase; four other corridors went on and there was writing on the wall. 'Ivan and Twilight were here, we went up.'
Finally! Lord Aendyr gave a huge sigh of relief. "We should have marked our trail." He now carved the wall with Frostrazor and we headed up the staircase.
Halfway up it, however, I felt something cold and strange and Lord Aendyr shivered. "Something's lurking. Show yourself!" he shouted angrily. "I AM SICK OF THIS SHIT!"
Then he froze and covered his mouth and looked mortified, while I tittered nervously. I was a filthy mess and still rather wet and exhausted and hungry and there had been a distinct lack of gems.
"Hey, ya'll," I heard Applejack say. "I'm gonna get you all out of this silly thing as soon as I can. Apple Bloom's in big trouble for trading cider without asking me."
"Maybe you can turn it into a tourist attraction and make back the money," Lord Aendyr said. "I know Ierendi is full of this kind of crazy thing."
"Hey... that might work," Applejack said excitedly. "It ain't like we wuz usin' these caves for nothin'." Her accent got thicker as she spoke. "Apple Bloom, how the hay do these controls work, anyway?"
you are not the one, I heard a voice whisper and then the cold retreated.
"Did you hear that?" I asked Lord Aendyr.
He frowned. "I definitely heard something," I said.
"Scootaloo, quit your bitchin'," Applejack said to Scootaloo, who I hadn't heard at all.
"We could send a shadow construction crew to remove the wards, but until the teleport wards go down, there ain't no way in or out but walking and falling," Apple Bloom said. "I think we kinda overestimated how much they could cover in one day."
"We got split up," I said. "And some creepy invisible thing was whispering about how I wasn't the one, whatever that means." I frowned. Clearly it has no taste.
"I'm gonna be pissed if the Oard's hidin' in my dungeon," Apple Bloom said darkly.
"Oards are myths," Lord Aendyr said firmly.
"They're real! Cunning Thought wouldn't lie to us, she's Celestia's mother," Sweetie said. "And people pretended to be Oards at the club, so they have to be real or you couldn't get anyone to believe your lie!"
Lord Aendyr rubbed his forehead and whispered, "Did you understand that?"
"Twilight, Ivan, Marcus, Helga, any of you hear us?" Applejack asked.
I didn't hear them but Applejack said, "Okay, that's Marcus and Helga checkin' in. What about Twilight? Ivan?"
"I'll call Uncle K, see if he knows some quicker way to take the wards down," Apple Bloom said.
"No more puttin' up wards without my say-so," Applejack said sternly to Apple Bloom.
We reached the top of the stairs, found the 'Twilight and Ivan were here' marker and I said, "We're on Twilight and Ivan's trail, so we'll keep following it."
"You two okay? Marcus and Helga are kinda' freakin'," Applejack said.
"We are filthy messes, exhausted, and hungry and I regret my own birth," I said miserably. "But other than that, we're fine."
"Tell her I miss her," Lord Aendyr said plaintively. I smiled at that.
"I will," Applejack said.
We began following a trail of destruction; everything was blown up or smashed up, from traps to golem remnants to the room which was strewn with pine sap and pine branches; Lord Aendyr flew us over that, to my gratitude.
After a while of this and periodically leaving our mark and seeing Twilight and Ivan's, Applejack said, "Hey, Rarity, you carryin' any rubies?"
"No," I told her.
"Well, that won't do no good and I still don't know why we can't reach Ivan and Twilight either," Applejack said, sounding aggravated.
"Well, they've more or less destroyed everything in their path," I said.
"Wait, don't the Crusaders have a map of this place?" Lord Aendyr said. "We could probably figure things out better with a map."
"I can't find the map! We had this big fancy map and now it's vanished," Apple Bloom said, sounding frustrated.
Delightful.
"That was very irresponsible, young lady," Lord Aendyr said sternly. "No recall mechanism, no map... what kind of Dungeon Master are you?"
Apple Bloom said weakly, "It's my first dungeon."
"We just wanted to do something fun for you," Sweetie said weakly.
"I know y'all meant well but you shoulda asked someone to look over your plans," Applejack said sternly. "We'll have to fix all that before we turn this into a tourist dungeon." I could almost hear coins jingling in her voice. It was odd, more like I'd expect of Clarity.
"Whatever you heard, it wasn't an Oard; I scanned the entrance to the dungeon and there were no traces of temporal energy," Dinky said. "It might have been a Shadow that decided you weren't tasty enough."
"I'm kinda worried we can't hail Twilight and Ivan," Applejack said. "Scootaloo, go find Clarity. Maybe she can magic something up."
"It had glowing red eyes, I think," Lord Aendyr said. "But I might have imagined that."
"Lord Aendyr, your kids are in bed, at least in theory," I now heard Bon-Bon say. "Lyra sent me to tell you."
"Thank you, Lady Bon-Bon," Lord Aendyr said. "I hope they weren't too much trouble."
"Once Lyra sleeps for a few days, she'll be fine," Bon-Bon said.
I laughed softly, then heard a distant explosion. "I think we're getting closer," I told her. Oddly the smell of pine sap was getting stronger.
I heard the sounds of pages flipping. "I am pretty sure there's some kind of X-ray vision scanner thing around here somewhere..." Apple Bloom said.
We passed a destroyed giant snake statue and smashed up altar and the explosions got louder. We were closing in. I had a bad feeling Twilight had gone berserk and was just destroying everything. Which could be hard to calm her down from. Either that or she was just overreacting to the various threats.
But I was worried about that weird shadowy thing. Who was it looking for? Given the Crusaders didn't seem to know what it was... what was it and why was it here?
Applejack said something but I couldn't understand it. "Can you repeat that?"
But now I couldn't hear her at all, just a staticky sound. Maybe Twilight's using so much magic it's frying out the communications?
"We'd best retreat to where we can hear them," Lord Aendyr said.
I didn't want to retreat; I had a feeling Twilight needed us. "I think they need us. If nothing else, I may need to calm down Twilight. She wouldn't do this much damage if she was calm."
He eyed the scorch marks on the wall, clearly worried about how much damage Twilight could do. I was worried too, but Twilight needed me. I have to help her. "Okay, forwards," he said hesitantly and we pressed on.
*****************
We could hear Ivan and Twilight shouting and some kind of something howling and then a loud chime went off and I cursed, then tried to cover my mouth and nearly fell down, since I had a passenger.
I tried to press on through the remains of a tunnel which was a tube with metal walls but now there was an odd shimmering field, softly rose colored in front of us. I now realized the field didn't quite fit the tube... it was square and the tube was round.
It slowly drifted closer and I could see bones floating in the air behind it, though there was something odd about them...
"Well, that is certainly creepy," Lord Aendyr said.
And now we heard the sound of many feet striking the ground at once behind us. Trapped between foes.
"Let's try and push it back," I told Lord Aendyr; it resisted, but we pressed forwards, shoving it out of the tube and into a hallway it fit more closely, whatever it was. But now the foe behind us was catching up.
It was a strange creature, maybe thirty feet long with a draconic head and many legs and a long snakey body. Its scales were metallic blue and lighting crackled around its mouth and nose. We threw ourselves flat when it spat lightning at us, and it blew away the field which dissolved into a gooey looking puddle of liquid.
"Forward, I'll lift us," Lord Aendyr said and we sailed over the gunk; the creature briefly froze up when it splashed through the gunk, giving us more room to move. Until we reached a great chasm; the bridge was blown up and I could see flashes of light from a room beyond it. And the creature was closing in.
"I can..." Then Lord Aendyr grimaced. "There's a huge downdraft; if I try to fly, we'll likely get pushed into the chasm."
The creature stalked towards us and I tried shouting for help, but no one could hear us.
"Hopefully the Crusaders were sensible..." Even as I said it, I knew I was foolish to hope that. This thing was intended for *all* of us to fight it.
"If I was a better elementalist, I could get us past the downdraft or turn into an Air Elemental and take this thing out," Lord Aendyr said ruefully. "Countess Rarity, should this be our tomb, I can at least say I am glad to have met you."
"Don't give up," I told him. "While there is life, there is hope." Why hasn't it spat at us again? I could see the lightning around its mouth. "Marcus never gives up." This was... not entirely true, though he doesn't give up when it's important. But my job was to light a fire under his feet.
He winced at that and straightened up. "At the least, it isn't blasting us again for some reason. It must need time to recharge its power."
It has to support itself with its legs, so it won't...
Then I had an idea. I whipped out a length of cloth, flew it at high speed and blindfolded the creature. As I hoped, it couldn't lift its legs enough to work the blindfold and now it couldn't see and began to thrash wildly at nothing.
Lord Aendyr studied the chasm and the draft, which I couldn't see but he could. I haven't gotten that far in my studies yet. "Do you have any of your shapeshifting candy?" he asked.
"I always carry a few now," I told him.
"I am trying to think of something we could turn into in order to get across," he told me.
We were still discussing this when our foe gave a great roar and managed to scrape off his blindfold on the wall. I have rarely been this scared in my entire life. Certainly not since I had to watch Marcus die for us at the gateway to the Hells.
I could feel the air shift as if in anticipation of blasting us to hell and gone, as if a road was somehow building itself in a line forward from the creature's mouth. I probably imagined it, though I think Pegasi can actually feel that kind of thing and even produce it.
This was the end; if the lightning didn't kill us, it would likely send us over the edge or it would just rush in on us and eat us. I was readying arrows instinctively but it was too late. We were doomed.
"Oww, dammit," I heard Lady Aendyr curse and then she grabbed the creature's head and forced its mouth shut. ...
She'd somehow grown so tall she couldn't stand up in the hallway and jumped onto the thing from behind and was now grappling its mouth, even as Marcus hacked away at the creature. The good news was that it couldn't blast us. The bad news was that we were running out of space because the wrestling match between Lady Aendyr and the monster pushed it towards us and left us between a monster and a long fall.
But I had a plan. "In my saddlebags now," I told him and he clambered in as quick as he could, even as the creature thrashed and got ever closer.
And then I prayed I could make this work. I've seen Twilight do it many times, but I never have done it. I know the teleport protocol for replying to a request to teleport in but I could never make teleporting work. But it was our best hope here.
It is a complex weave of magical energies but I do excel at complex work.
And I had to protect Lord Aendyr; he is my guest and it would be unmannerly to let him die.
Ahaha.
This would be so much easier with my element but it was locked away securely. Artifacts should not be used lightly.
I knew where I wanted to land. I reached out and wove the spell, praying that I was not dooming myself and Lord Aendyr to wander the planes or to die. He was counting on me and I would not fail him. For the heart of nobility, the heart of being a true lady, is to live up to your obligations and those who depend on you.
I may not ever be the lady I once dreamed of being. I can see from talking to Lord Aendyr and Lady Aendyr that there are aspects of nobility which would gall me if I had to live them. But true nobility is being someone others can rely on. And aiding others with your abilities.
Even if they want to look like a whale.
I *had* to do this. And so I assembled the spell and released it and felt the world whirl around me; I could see my target destination and where I left at once and then they became one and I felt magic in my veins.
My legacy as a unicorn.
And then the world returned to normal and I was behind Marcus, who was a mess and once again *nearly naked*. His new clothing was reduced to basically a pair of shorts. What is it with this place?
Lady Aendyr now threw the monstrosity into the chasm and it fell out of sight, blasting the side of the chasm with lightning as it fell. "Oh shit, Countess Rarity! Darien!"
"We're back here," I told her and helped Lord Aendyr out; Lady Aendyr was so tall she couldn't actually stand in the hallway, so it looked like her hugging a doll until Marcus dispelled the spell and she shrank down to normal. Her clothing was shredded as well; I felt bad for her as I know that's very embarrassing to humans.
And painful to me that my work was destroyed so quickly.
Marcus hugged me tightly as well. "Tell me you're okay."
"I'm fine," I told him. I was exhausted from the teleport, though; I may have the finesse for this now but I don't have Twilight's raw power. Still don't.
"Countess Rarity, thank you," Lady Aendyr said to me warmly. "For protecting Darien."
"He did his part to protect me as well," I said and *looked* at Marcus.
Marcus and Lord Aendyr looked at each other. Then Marcus said to Lord Aendyr, stiffly, "Thank you for helping Rarity. When I couldn't be there for her."
Lord Aendyr looked stunned, then said, "Countess Rarity is a woman... a mare of many fine qualities." His lips quirked into a little smile. "I regret you do not live closer to us, Countess. Helga could use a friend like you who she could see more often." He sighed, then stiffened as if forcing himself to something. "Marcus, you have likely saved my life or at least prevented hideous injury and you have stuck by my wife's side when she needed you here and brought her back to me as safe as anything in this madhouse can be." For a second, I heard his teeth grind. "Thank you, Marcus."
"I have to assume that someone helped them out with this, though they did build the Moonraker really quickly..." Marcus said, looking around. "You're welcome, Darien. And yes, we're both very lucky men."
"You certainly are," Lady Aendyr said, slapping him on the back; he nearly fell down. "Now we have to go save Ivan and Twilight."
"Or possibly save the dungeon from them," Marcus said. "I can hear faint explosions even with the wind howling ahead."
We then began brainstorming on how to get past said howling wind.
******************
Our combined magical ability and Lord Aendyr and Lady Aendyr's air magical knowledge enabled us to re-direct the downdraft enough to leave a gap; then I built a rope-bridge out of my remaining clothing supplies and we crossed, then I rolled it up and stored it for later use. We followed the sound of explosions and finally found Twilight and Ivan busy smashing up crystals set into the walls of a cavern. "Twilight, calm down!" I shouted to her. "We're here, we're okay, we need to work together to get out."
Twilight saw us now and galloped over, Ivan barely hanging on; he was riding her. "Rarity!"
We hugged as best as Ponies can, and then I stood close to her, letting her share my calm; I could feel the tug of her panic, but I fought it off. Ivan and Lady Aendyr were embracing and I could see him calming down.
"Rarity figured out how to teleport," Marcus said proudly to Twilight.
"It's so exhausting," I said. "And I am SO hungry," I continued. "And filthy."
"Hey, we do have that candy," Ivan said. "We shouldn't eat too much or we'll get sick but it should take the worst of the edge off, right?"
I had some taffy, Marcus took a redhot, Ivan tried a white candy, Twilight took a green hard candy, Lady Aendyr took some licorice and Lord Aendyr tried a black candy. "This is deliciously like good ice coffee," Lord Aendyr said approvingly.
Frost began to drift out of Ivan's mouth and Marcus stared at tiny tendrils of smoke coming out of his mouth. My taffy was quite delicious, but... Then Ivan breathed out a freezing cloud. "I... does this give you a breath weapon?" More frost came out.
"This must be magic candy... which she said it was her finest..." Marcus said weakly, flames coming out of his mouth. "TOO HOT."
Twilight shoved a waterball into his mouth and now he spat up water on her and himself but the fire went out. "Thank you, sorry," he mumbled.
Ivan began freezing crystals and laughing.
"We need to figure out a quick way to get out."
There was a sound like ice breaking and then I heard the voice of Cunning Thought. "There you go. Can you hear me now?" She sounded hugely amused.
Oh dear.
"I can hear you, Cunning Thought," Twilight said wearily.
"You're fortunate that Sweetie called me," Cunning Thought said cheerfully. "Don't worry, dear Sweetie, we'll have them right out now."
Twilight now teleported us right to the control room, which surprised me; did she know where it was? It was full of odd magical gimcracks and... it was up inside their new treehouse. Which flies but they're not allowed to cruise around unsupervised.
Cunning Thought was here, along with Clarity, Spikey, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash. But no Pinkie. Most of the Crusaders were gone, except an exhausted Apple Bloom and Sweetie.
"You all okay?" Dash asked, clearly worried.
"I am miserably hungry and filthy and I think I smell of dead monster," I moaned, flopping onto my fainting couch.
"Rarity!" Fluttershy said, then whipped grapes out of her saddlebags and began trying to cram them all into my mouth. Too many at once, but I was so hungry, I didn't care.
Cunning Thought began fussing over Twilight.
"Are you okay?" Sweetie asked Marcus.
"I'm fine, but you all need to think these things through," Marcus said, ruffling her mane. "Applejack, I hope you have something we can eat."
"Grannie and Big Mac will whip up a ton of pancakes and we can test my new apple bacon," Applejack said.
"You have bacon?" Ivan asked, surprised.
"It's fake-bacon but should be right good," Applejack said proudly.
"Does it smell like Marcus?" Ivan continued, grinning a little.
"Shut up," he mumbled, but now ruffled my mane gently and smiled and I smiled at him and tried to not spew crumbs in his face.
"I'm afraid I don't know you, but thank you," Lord Aendyr said to Cunning Thought.
"I am Celestia and Luna's mother, Cunning Thought," she said grandly.
"LOKI," I heard Marcus hiss to Lady Aendyr, whose eyes widened.
"She's our good friend," Sweetie said and nuzzled her.
Right now, I could accept anyone who got us out of that as our good friend.
"Mother!" Princess Luna said, now appearing. "What are you doing... Ivan?" She stared at Ivan, who was covered in ashes and glowing with random magic and still making frost come out of his mouth.
"Luna, there was a Shadow Pony; I think Twilight drove it off, maybe blew it up entirely," Ivan said, turning serious. "Mumbling about crystals."
Princess Luna's eyes narrowed and I could see fire in them and Cunning Thought turned to study Ivan. "Mumbling what about crystals?"
"I don't know, but he said he'd found something and something about crystals and then he kind of blew up," Ivan said.
"I was too busy destroying things to listen," Twilight said, laughing nervously.
"Did he do anything beyond lurk and explode?" Princess Luna asked, frowning.
"We saw him," I said. "He studied us and left, saying we weren't who he was looking for."
"You had best all go rest," Princess Luna said. "Mother and I are going down to look around."
"If you need us...," I began.
"It is probably nothing," Princess Luna said but she clearly didn't believe that. "But you are all worn and torn and I know Celestia is expecting you in Canterlot tomorrow. Go, rest and recover. I will see you later."
Cunning Thought sighed. "Well, this is the perfect chance for me to tell you about your new siblings. They've already burned down the artificial womb Rathanos made for them! I'm so proud of them!"
Lord and Lady Aendyr stared, eyes wide.
I would have stared but I hardly had any energy left.
"Mother!" Princess Luna protested, hiding her face with her wings.
"Anyway, when are you and Ivan going to give me grandchildren?" Cunning Thought grinned.
"MOTHER!" Princess Luna shouted.
Ivan buried his face in his hands.
"We're going NOW," Princess Luna said and she vanished with Cunning Thought.
It was time to go home before I die of hunger.
***************
Applejack fed us very well, so well I fell into a food coma and didn't wake up until the next morning. (I can tell you that apple-bacon has the look and texture of bacon but smells and tastes like apples. I have no idea how it works.) I still don't know how they got me home but I woke up at sunrise to the sound of Marcus screaming in his sleep; I shook him awake. "Honey, it's okay, it was just a dream."
"Everyone was eaten by slime monsters," he mumbled and sat up. "Oh good, we did get out."
"We need to get dressed, have breakfast and get ready to head to Canterlot."
Sweetie hugged me very tightly when I came out and found her and Lady Aendyr making breakfast. "I'm so sorry! We just thought it would be fun!"
"It was fun," Lady Aendyr said, stretching. "I haven't gotten to do that in forever."
"I can't let you cook," I said, mortified. "You're my guest."
"It's okay, I could tell you would sleep in," Lady Aendyr said. "It's kind of nice to do this myself."
"Where's your husband?" I asked. He should be helping her.
"Talking to the kids and Pinkie," Lady Aendyr said. "And Lyra. Who both basically passed out on the floor by the kid's beds." She laughed at that.
"Thank you, Lady Aendyr," I told her. "How can I help?"
"Please, call me Helga. After everything we've been through, we ought to be able to use each other's first names," she said hesitantly.
"Okay, Helga," I said, feeling a little embarrassed. But I thought about all I'd been through.
To be noble... to be a lady... is more complicated than I'd always thought. And it's nice to have people you don't have to put up a front with. And from what I have heard, she doesn't have many. I feel terrible for her. So I will be the best friend I can.
"We will have a grand time in Canterlot. Dash will be coming with us, since we'll be visiting her museum," I told Helga.
"Tell me all about it," she said. "I understand you all took a trip to the North Pole."
"But they wouldn't let us go," Sweetie said mournfully.
So I launched into the tale as we made breakfast.
******************
Princess Luna and Ivan showed up as we had all assembled to take off (joined by Rainbow Dash), then she took Marcus, Ivan, Dash, and I aside into my room. "We're not entirely sure if something got loose from the Wandering Monster Generator to cause trouble or if a real Shadow Pony infiltrated the place. If it was real, it should have left a body, so probably it was either a construct or something the WMG made. We think the amount of magic Twilight was slinging jammed communications around her, but it's not impossible the creature was doing it for some reason."
"Who do the Shadow Ponies serve?" I asked. I have heard legends of them but no one I know has ever seen a real one.
"Many different immortals of Entropy," Princess Luna said. "Including mother, but I believe she is innocent. This isn't her style and I do not think she would deliberately ruin something the Crusaders did. Give them the tools to blow themselves up... yes. But she'd make sure they loved her more for it." Princess Luna tried to pace but my room doesn't have enough room for proper pacing.
I'm sorry, Princess. I should fix that.
"He had some kind of Thanatos connection but something else too, something I didn't recognize," Ivan said, frowning and trying to pace as well, which now caused him and Luna to collide, then laugh weakly.
Marcus laughed loudly. "We could go out back if you need space to move."
"You should not have any trouble in Canterlot," Princess Luna said. "Enjoy your time with your friends."
"So we have no idea what this Shadow Pony wanted," Marcus said, frowning.
"I think he wanted some kind of crystal thing," Ivan said. "That's why we were kind of smashing those crystals when you found us."
"They were all mundane or only very mildly enchanted," Princess Luna said. "Mother has a theory but I can't talk about it." She sighed. "Immortal business."
"I understand," I told her. "I just want our trip to go smoothly."
"So what's this business with Loki claiming she and Rathanos had babies?" Marcus asked hesitantly.
Princess Luna buried her face with her wings for a few seconds, then sighed. "Mother is busy shoving her face into a lion's mouth again. If it causes trouble for us, I will be very cross."
"So at this point, you don't need us to do anything," Marcus said.
"Ivan and I will be doing some investigating later, but for now, just enjoy your vacation and your work. Celestia and I will let you know when and if further action is needed," Princess Luna said.
That was a relief. I just don't want anything *else* to go wrong on this vacation.
******************
Much as I feared it might be trouble, I invited Dona Carlotta and Otto to join us at Dash's museum. She is friends with Darien and I hope she and Marcus can get past everything and he has to get over his issues with Otto. Her father, Don Diego, joined us as well. Sweetie came with us, but not the other Crusaders, having volunteered to run herd on Samantha and Sugar Sparkle. Marcus had a new hat... bought for him from the gift shop by Darien and Helga; it showed Rainbow Dash flying over the North Pole; he bought a second for Scootaloo, which I'm sure she'll appreciate.
Dash was utterly excited as she roamed around the museum with us, showing everything off. "This is Cherry Blossom, the first Unicorn to break through the..." Dash's face screwed up. "O c t y llic barrier." She had to slowly make her way through the word.
"Octyllic," Darien said. "You can think of magical potential in terms of how much energy you can channel. To pass the Expert level test at the Great School of Magic, you must be able to break through the Octyllic barrier and cast spells which require power beyond that level. It's unclear if there's a real barrier or if it's a purely intellectual concept for us to organize degrees of power."
"Right," Dash said. "Her generation was the first to begin showing the modern range of colors of Ponies; you can see her parents were brown and dappled." She pointed them out. "The researchers were baffled by the color changes and never did figure out the basis of them."
"What was the basis? Beyond magic?" Darien asked.
"They never figured it out," Dash said nervously and Marcus laughed softly. "You don't know either!"
"My slime breeding experiments have shown a set of combinations which always result; is Pony coat and mane color predictable from the parents?" Don Diego asked.
"Well... sometimes..." Dash said. "Mom and I don't have the exact same Mane colors but we have the same kind of a striped pattern."
"Rose breeding is very predictable," Dona Carlotta said. "As long as you have a good idea of the geneaology of the roses and they've been bred true for several generations. But they don't have the full diversity of Ponies."
"I expect there's some kind of destiny component, given how Cutie Marks work," Marcus said.
They now got into a long argument which didn't interest me much but no one I liked was trying to kill each other with their eyes, and I considered that a step forwards. You can't just get rid of enmity in a day but I felt there was hope for the future.
To my surprise, Princess Celestia now approached us, having somehow gotten in unannounced. "Rarity, thank you for that nice party in Ponyville. It was nice to be a guest instead of the hostess for once and just enjoy myself."
I smiled warmly. "I'm glad you enjoyed it. It didn't end the way I hoped, though." I sighed.
"I had a grand time," Celestia said.
Then I had to introduce her to my guests. She patted Samantha and Sugar Sparkle on the head and shook hand-to-hoof with the adult Aendyrs. "I will ensure your stay here for your business is smooth," she told them very seriously. "I have been considering your uncle's offer, Lord Aendyr; we can discuss that tomorrow, though. For now, I just would like to see Dash's masterwork here, and get to know you better."
I could see Helga was breathing hard, nervous, while Darien seemed totally comfortable. "Don't worry, she's very nice but likes to tease," I told her softly. "Just be yourself and I'm sure she'll like you."
"I just don't want to mess this up," she said softly to me. "Diplomacy is not my strong point."
"Can I ride you?" Samantha asked.
"Samantha, you can't ask a Princess to carry you," Darien said chidingly to her.
"I would love to carry you," Celestia said warmly. "Marcus, won't you help her up?"
Marcus did so and Sugar Sparkle said, "I want to go next!"
Darien buried his face in his hands, but Celestia said, "In a little while, young lady." Then she looked at me.
"You can ride me if you like," I told Sugar Sparkle kindly.
"Okay!"
"I understand you are an old friend of my special agent, Marcus," Celestia said to Helga. "From his adventuring days."
"I'm Ivan's cousin; the two of us went adventuring with him for a long time," Helga said. "We've known each other a long time."
"You must know some good, embarrassing stories you can tell about him, then," Celestia said cheerfully.
Marcus buried his face in his hands.
Helga perked up. "Most definitely."
"Ahh, you shouldn't tell embarrassing stories about your friends!" Sweetie said urgently.
"They're the best people to tell such stories about," Helga said and launched into a long story about the time Marcus tried to be a model. By the end of it, Marcus had to launch into a story about Helga in revenge. By the time we finished our tour, Helga had relaxed around Celestia.
And I think that's what she wanted.
Celestia is a true lady, a true noble. We follow her because we love her and she understands us and how to make us happy. With her, you can always be at your ease. That is a model I aspire to.
****************
Eventually, we had to go home; we had to catch the train home, so we couldn't stay too late. I hugged Helga goodbye. "Drop by for dinner when you finish here; we'd love to see you one more time," I told her.
"You should move to Glantri," she told me. "I'd like to see you all more often."
"When Ivan conquers Karameikos, we can all move in with him," I told her, smiling.
She rubbed her forehead. "Please keep him from getting in over his head."
"Of course," I told her.
This time, we got a big open space for them to teleport home in, so nothing got messed up, and then it was time to go home and collapse. I work tomorrow and Marcus has school to teach and Sweetie school to go to.
I think I have much to think about with regards to my future. What it means to be noble. Our future as Immortals... something I had never dreamed of, and yet, that is the road we walk now. That Twilight needs us to walk with her.
I am a dreamer, a creator at heart. An artist. And sometimes I have to confront the reality behind my dreams. But I will not turn aside. This will help me to be better in the future. Even when people want me to help them look like a whale.
I need to stop whining about that. But I haven't reached perfection yet.
Yet.
The End. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Short Story 5: Shadows of the Past | Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
I have come to understand the REAL reason my parents were so grim and quiet during my childhood. They were exhausted from trying to keep us alive. Teleportation is *supposed* to be very hard. Rarity only just learned it and she's way older than Pumpkin Cake. But every time I have to babysit her, she casually teleports around as much as I poing.
Which is how I ended up on top of the Town Hall, trying to talk her off a flagpole. I could easily walk out to her, but what if she fell from the pole shifting under my weight? I can't take that chance.
My right saddlebag squirmed; I'd trapped Pound Cake inside it so he wouldn't go lead a bear into town again like the last time I left him alone for *two seconds*.
It wasn't so much left him alone as turned around to say hello to Applejack, either!
The Cakes are off at Applejack's farm, trying to find the right apples for their apple pies. There's a secret to it and I can't quite get it to my frustration. I'm an Earth Pony but all my skill is with rocks and dirt and gems and metal and so on. It's a little embarrassing sometimes.
I very gently touched the flagpole with a hoof, feeling out the metal--how flexible was it, how strong was it, could it handle my weight, how fast would I have to move in order to go out without a disaster.
Pumpkin Cake was making happy noises and trying to catch birds with her magic. She wasn't having much luck but it at least kept her stable.
I hope I never did this to my Mother.
BLAM, FLASHBACK.
I normally love these, but no, not now!!!!!
*********************
"I want to fly!" I proclaimed as I rode on Grandma's back. Grandma Pie is a Pegasus. She and Mom never got on very well, which I never understood until recently.
"Just hold on tight, dear," she said to me.
So, of course, I jumped off her back, trying to fly on my own. I'd carefully made myself wings to strap to my forelegs.
This actually worked better than it should, but I was still spiraling down until she caught me. And made me destroy the wings, which was heartbreaking but I know now she didn't want me to die.
But it drove me to eventually invent my gyrocopter.
Which I could be using right now!!!!
***************
I came out of the flashback and quickly got out my gyrocopter and hopped into it, then flew over where I could grab Pumpkin Cake while there was still time; fortunately, her eyes were clouded over and she was probably flashing back to the last time she ate or something.
You really can't have a *quality*, lesson-teaching flashback when you're that young.
Thanks, flashback. You always have to be kind to them; they only want to help.
Even if this one didn't have any music in it.
As I was flying down to Sugarcube Corner, I was surprised to see Moondancer pacing back and forth in front of the store; I had put up a 'Baby emergency' sign before I went.
I *can* be responsible.
Moondancer looked up curiously at me as I landed my craft and I smiled at her. "Gyrocopter! Wave of the future! You want to try it?"
"Princess Luna needs you," Moondancer said, striding over to me and then wobbling back and forth on her hooves, not clumsily but urgently.
"I can't leave until the Cakes get back," I told her. "I have their children in my care."
Moondancer frowned intensely, so I offered her a cupcake, which she ate silently with a scheming face. "Where are they?"
"At Applejack's," I told her.
BLAM, stars whirled around me and we landed in front of Applejack's house. Apple Bloom was tumbling away from us. "Hey, don't land on me when I'm doin' chores!" she shouted.
In fact, we landed in a giant tub of apples which now crunched under our feet. Moondancer lithely leaped out and then PUSHED down with her magic, crushing all the apples into applejuice and bits and bits with one push.
Apple Bloom stared, eyes wide.
And I was now covered in apple juice and bits along with Pumpkin Cake.
Normally, I wouldn't care, but I am babysitting. Pumpkin Cake began laughing happily and Pound Cake tried to escape again.
"Your chore is done," Moondancer said curtly, then lifted me with her magic and galloped off towards one of the orchards, me bobbling in the air after her.
"Weeeeee!" Pumpkin Cake shouted happily as we flew.
"Why are you in such a hurry?" I asked her curiously. And how does she know where to find the Cakes? Or is she just planning to run all over the farm?
Well, flying is fun, so I decided to take this chance to tuck Pumpkin Cake in with her brother. Unfortunately, Pound Cake now tried to make a break for it and I barely grabbed him with my tail as I placed Pumpkin Cake into the saddlebag. I heard noises suspiciously like someone turning my cupcake supply into broccoli.
I laughed, then worried what I would do if I needed a cupcake. But you have to laugh at disasters, so they can't break you. Grandma Pie taught me that.
I felt blood rushing to my head; I was dangling upside down as Pound Cake somehow generated enough lift to make me dangle from him by my own tail as Moondancer dragged me along. It would have been cool if I could handle this headrush.
Then frogs began to rain from the sky; suspiciously cupcake-shaped frogs.
Pumpkin Cake may well be the greatest Unicorn ever, I think. I tried licking one of the frogs as they went by. They TASTED like cupcakes. I bet Marcus would love these. And Ivan.
So I snagged a few with my tongue, leaving the others to scatter. I can only do so much.
Finally, I saw Applejack and the Cakes, who were collecting apples. Then Applejack saw us and stared in horror.
"Hi, Applejack!" I said. "Don't worry, I have the kids *totally* under control." Then I made a weird noise because my tail was starting to want to give up on child-grappling. "I think Pound Cake's going to be able to lift an elephant when he grows up!"
And he suddenly clonked out; I caught him, sliding him smoothly into the saddlebag.
"My babies! You crazy mare, why are you yanking my babies around?" Mrs. Cake said angrily to Moondancer, getting in her face.
"Princess Luna needs to see Pinkie TWO HOURS AGO," Moondancer said. "But she was out running around in a weird machine with your children!"
Mr. Cake sighed deeply. "New crib failed?" he asked.
"Yes," I told him. "I'm not sure how Pound Cake ate one side of it, but he did, and there were traces of candy cane left behind, instead of wood." The surprise smell of candy cane was the first sign of trouble when I was *trying* to make their lunch, thinking they were secure in the crib.
I now know they are never, ever secure if I cannot see them.
"It can't be so urgent ya had to carry Pinkie upside down," Applejack said. "But if Luna really needs her, we can take care of 'em. I'm used to herding little fillies."
There was a distant peal of thunder and the Cakes and I winced in unison, though Pound Cake tried to imitate the sound and then the thunder went off *again*.
Applejack frowned. "The sky is clear."
Then a cold wind from the north hit us, blowing my mane in my face and totally flattening Mrs. Cake's mane. "My perm!" she shouted in a panic.
I handed the foals over to Applejack and straightened myself out. "I'm ready, Moondancer! Someone has to catch the cupcake-frogs, though."
"The what?" Moondancer asked in confusion. Surely she hadn't missed the rain of frogs, though it was behind her, I guess. "Let's go!" And then BLAMMO, stars grabbed me and took me away!
******************
Shadows of the Past
A Pinkie Pie and Luna Team-Up Story by John Biles
Part of the Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring continuity.
*******************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
I shouldn't have been so urgent with Moondancer, but this whole affair has me rather agitated. Too many memories of the past.
So I was busy pacing a rut in my carpet when Moondancer appeared with a somewhat frazzled Pinkie Pie. Cadence was sprawled out on the floor with Spike, playing chess. And losing.
I hate losing. But Cadence was somehow enjoying losing, which I cannot understand at all.
I signaled Ivan; he'd gone off to the bathroom. Then I said to Moondancer, "Thank you, Moondancer. Thank you for coming, Pinkie."
"I'd give you a cupcake, but the baby turned them all into frogs," Pinkie said mournfully. ...
"Pinkie Pie!" Cadence said and then they both leaped on each other and tumbled around hugging and laughing. I had to envy them that a little; I haven't felt that kind of joy very often in a very long time.
But it's why I've called them both. I need wells of good spirit where we are going.
And I hesitate to take Spike but we may encounter another Shadow Dragon. His power will be invaluable.
I pray I am not making a mistake.
Ivan soon returned from the bathroom and I began my speech. "I have called you all together for a dangerous mission. We are going to the Adri Varna Plateau, to do some investigating. I have chosen you for your talents. Cadence to bind our powers together. Pinkie Pie because we will need your joy. Spike, because of your ability to repel other dragons. And Ivan for his skills and shadow mastery."
"I'm not that great yet," Ivan confessed. "But I'll do my best." But he smiled broadly at me. I have great confidence in him. I just hope he can avoid the mistakes I made in my youth.
"We are to avoid combat if possible," I continued, pacing back and forth as Pinkie dug in her saddlebags. "It may be nothing, but something is stirring on the Adri Varna and we need to be ready."
And there is more. Cadence is a descendant of the last Queen of the Crystal Empire. She bears one of the artifacts of that empire as a Cutie Mark, though the Crystal Heart has been lost for centuries. To my knowledge... Valerias may know where it is, since she made it, but we do not get on well enough for me to ask.
Nor do I want her sticking her nose into our affairs any more than we can help. But it may be inescapable.
I have to know if Sombra has returned from... wherever he has gone.
"So we're going to the ruins of the Crystal Empire?" Cadence asked softly.
"There are no ruins, the whole thing is missing," I told her. "Though if we do find ruins, we'll know something is wrong." There may be ruins of their lesser towns, now that I think about it; it was their capital which vanished. Or so I am told, as I spent a thousand years in chains and haven't been back.
I hope, maybe, we can find the Crystal Crown; it is an artifact older than most Immortals, made before the Immortal Storm. I do not think it made you a true Immortal while you wore it, but the bearer certainly did command vast power. Uncle Full Moon told me that he thinks it was made by a now dead immortal, the last remnant of her power.
"I will do my best!" Spike said, striking a heroic pose.
"I know you will," Cadence said, smiling at him. "You can ride me, Spike."
"Cool," he said and clambered up onto her back.
I nodded to Ivan and he mounted me as well. Pinkie now pulled her pet alligator out of her saddlebags and put Gummy on her back.
He fell off, so she tried again and he fell again.
"Pinkie, it is probably best he stay home," I told her.
She yanked out some rope. "Spike, can you tie him on?"
Gummy, as always, sat passively, not even caring when he fell down. I have never understood how an animal could be so mellow, but he seems otherwise a normal miniature alligator.
Spike now tied him on. "Probably better if he stays home, though."
"It'll be easier if we all have a rider," Pinkie said. She may be right, though we won't understand until later. Sometimes Pinkie is wise and insightful and sometimes she is just being silly. I couldn't tell which and in the end, it is her risk to take.
"So how do we get there?" Pinkie asked. "It's a long walk. And we need to bring lots of water; it's still hot and dry at this time of year there. I have some food but I should probably make more."
I was surprised by Pinkie thinking of all this... and not happy with myself for not thinking of it. I was too focused on my objective. And too used to teleporting places or having servants handy. "Let's round up supplies." We may be there a while and I could conjure food and drink but we do want a low profile.
We headed out to get supplies.
*********************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
I grew up in an area which is barren by Equestrian standards, though not on a level with the Adri Varna. You could live on the grass, but you didn't want to. We can still eat grass and things humans can't eat, but a lot of what we can eat but they can't... isn't very nutritious. You have to eat a *lot* of grass. One reason I love to eat cupcakes is that they save time, so I can spend it on making people happy.
So we spent some time in the kitchens and Spike and Cadence went to the well. He looks happier now, so I hope maybe he'll finally get over Rarity. I just want Spike to be happy, you know.
We probably made too much food, but cooking is *so much fun*, especially with people. Even when accidents happen.
Princess Luna jumped back and went into a defensive crouch as the lid blew off one of her pots because she had left the fire on too strongly under it. I nearly got clonked in the head and it ended up bouncing around and crashing into some pots and pans, making a glorious mess.
"You don't cook much, I guess," I said hesitantly.
"No, I can conjure food or the servants do it," she said. "And Celestia always cooked for us in the old days, if we cooked at all." She sighed and seized the lid with her magic and we turned the fire down. "Why are we boiling Spike's sausages before we grill them, anyway?"
"It reduces the greasiness," I told her. "You want *some*, it's half the fun of sausage, right, Ivan?" I don't eat meat normally but I know about cooking it; I'm a bard and bards travel.
"Yeah," Ivan said. He was busy making some kind of soup with garlic and potatoes and fish. "But not too much, especially if you put it in something else."
"Well, I am happy to teach you," I told her. I learned from Mom. I had a knack for cooking from the time I was very little. I mainly apply it to sweets these days but I can cook all sorts of treats. I'm learning more about human cooking now that I have more human friends.
"Ivan, tell us about what you're making," I told him.
"Soup," he said. "You just heat it all in a pot, once you prepare it all. Nothing too fancy, though it's nice having a good spice selection."
This would take some effort, but I soon got him talking about it in detail; I know Luna remembers everything perfectly as an Immortal, so this will help her make her coltfriend a treat in the future.
"Hmm, I used to have a cookbook for cactus," I said thoughtfully. "In case we lose our supplies and have to eat local things."
"Probably very little on the plateau is going to be safe to eat," Luna told me. "The taint of Entropy hangs strongly over the area. I wish I did not have to risk any of you." She sighed. "But I must."
"It's okay, danger is my middle name, along with cauliflower," I told her, then held some to my head. "Braaaaaains," I said, then ate it. It's better cooked but I can eat it raw easily. I can digest almost anything organic, but I can't eat rocks like Spike.
I tried when I was little, found out the hard way.
Man, I need to make some *rock candy*, even if Mom will complain it isn't really rock.
Princess Luna stared in confusion, but Ivan laughed. "Braaaaains," he mumbled and ate some of our cooked cauliflower.
"But... OH," Princess Luna said, then laughed softly, sadly. Her laughter is often so sad and I don't know how to overcome that. But I want to.
There's a goal. One hearty laugh from Luna by the end of this. Or a big smile. I'm good either way.
The celery horns trick doesn't work on her, by the way. But working for something just makes it better when you succeed!
********************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
"Good luck, everyone," Celestia said to us, then nuzzled me. She then turned to Pinkie. "Pinkie, I am counting on you to keep everyone's spirits up."
Pinkie nuzzled Celestia, then saluted her. "I will ensure everyone is covered in confetti and laughing to wake the dead by the time we return!"
Celestia laughed softly, while I said, "Confetti?"
"Confetti, like at a party or parade," Pinkie told us, then began idly tapping out a tune with her hooves; we had all donned ebony and opal hoofguards of my own design; they will help everyone to resist the entropic taints on the Adri Varna; I had made boots for Spike and Ivan.
"Ahh." It sounded vaguely dangerous. All these new words... I am still updating my vocabulary. When I first returned, I sounded rather archaic to everyone because Thyatian has changed so much over time.
But so has Equestria; I hardly recognized it at first, it was so different.
It has become what we dreamed of in the dark times when we were young and ponies were in chains and we dreamed of freedom. There is much less for Celestia and I to do. Which is for the best, as we cannot stay here forever and in the end, Equestria will have to stand on its own four hooves.
"I'm raring to go," Spike said excitedly, and I smiled. I am pleased to see him happy and not moping over Rarity, whose name will not be mentioned on this trip if I can help it.
I just hope Mother doesn't decide to meddle with us. I looked around, but thinking of her didn't summon her, so I let out a relieved sigh, then we all got into one of my larger chariots and took to the air with my faithful bat-ponies pulling us. They have faithfully served Celestia and I for many years, and I am grateful for it.
Pinkie then started up a song as we rose towards the top of the plateau, then headed northwest across it towards the Adri Varna Plateau, while I traded gossip with my other avatar, which is on the Moon. Due to my past... errors... my other self is stuck working in the library in the City of the Immortals. I could make a third but I do not want to burn that much power, not when I'm still recovering from my past errors.
However, she learns many interesting things from the library and I have always liked to study, anyway.
I have her busy studying any records of what's been going on at the Adri Varna but someone has, as usual, tampered with the records. But even a small clue would be good.
Some power of Entropy is at work there; I just hope we can avoid notice, which is why we're flying in; it won't produce large power signatures and it's too big to monitor the whole plateau.
I hope.
*******************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
I was starting to feel a little stir crazy by the time we finally made it to the Adri Varna; I like everyone on this trip, but we were all crammed into a large chariot and these things are not so great for multi-day trips.
This was the trip where I really learned that even I need privacy sometimes. I had reached the point of lying on my back and waving my legs in the air just to do something *different* when Ivan said, "Look, I think that's our destination."
It was; the Adri Varna rises up from grasslands and rocky desert into the air, so it can be drier, uglier, and more depressing than the lowlands around it. It's not a natural upthrust; something went wrong when Blackmoor blew up and various parts of the world suddenly sank into the ground, cracked open, rose into the air, or otherwise wrecked themselves.
Cadence began a series of songs and we sang with her, her power keeping the malevolence of the plateau off us; this place is evil and creepy and kind of seeps into you. I played my one-pony-band to accompany her. Bard to the rescue!
We flew over endless rocks and past a ruins which had once been a pony town; it saddened me to see the crumbling buildings and the strange creatures living among the ruins where once there had been life and love and happiness.
I decided to double-check my supplies. Gummy, check. Food, check. Stuff to *make* food, check. Four books I have started read... hey, I could READ THEM. I put them aside to actually read.
Allegedly silly string, check. I am starting to think this was some sort of con job; it just sits there, not being silly at all. Then Pumpkin Cake tries to eat it, and that wasn't funny either, as it made her throw up on me.
I meant to throw it away or maybe just tie something up with it.
Bottle of invisible ink, check. Glasses of Disguise, check. Glasses of Groucho, check. I don't understand why those have that name; they're basically a fake moustache and nose attached to glasses. The Glasses of Disguise somehow prevent people recognizing you but it seems to me like everyone sees something different. Except me, so I don't know who they think I am. Sometimes a fun game and sometimes it aggravates me and I screw up my disguise.
Snow globe which used to let me time travel but maybe I imagined it, check. Rubber duck, check. Second rubber duck, check. Rubber goose, check. Ru... I forgot my rubber chicken! Too late to go back for it, dangit.
Food for Gummy, check. Recipe book for Alligator treats, check. Small box of Efreet summoning, check. Unfortunately, he doesn't give you wishes, he just kicks you in the flank and lectures you in some language I don't actually know. It's usually good for a laugh.
Can which I have never been able to open; I think I could hack it open but it would ruin it. There has to be some way to open it but...
I spent about two hours fiddling with it, trying to find some way into it. Eventually, Princess Luna noticed what I was doing; she'd been staring at the landscape continually the whole time; Cadence and Spike were sleeping again and Ivan... I couldn't see Ivan anywhere, which is weird, given there's not much room to hide here.
"Interesting, a Blackmoorian Can of Preservation," she said. "There could be anything from magical items to books to food in there."
Oooooh. "I found it in a knickknack shop in Canterlot," I told the Princess. "How do you open it?"
"Well, once you break the seal, the magic ends," she said. "They had special machines which cleanly opened one end of the can, but a knife would do the trick. The inside is an extradimensional space which disgorges everything in it when you open it."
I decided to open it once I got home, just in case something too big for the chariot pops out. I saw a wizard pull an elephant out of his hat once.
Over the next several days, we passed multiple old pony towns and ate our food we brought with us; hardly anything grew here, except around the algae-choked lakes and that didn't look safe to eat.
I wonder how Shadow Ponies eat.
For that matter, I wonder where they are hiding, as we didn't see any this time.
Luna frowned. "This is too easy; last time, they found us quickly. I've tried to shroud our journey but..." She sighed and stared off across the countryside, idly tapping a hoof against the side of the chariot.
"Clearly, they are terrified of Gummy," I said. I didn't believe that but I hoped they would laugh.
Spike laughed, anyway. "Well, he wasn't there last time, anyway."
Princess Luna got her far-away look, which I think means she's contacting Celestia or maybe her mother or some other Immortal or maybe just one of her agents. So I left her to that and challenge Spike to chess.
As usual, I got whipped, but he smiled and *that* was the real goal.
I want to get there so bad, I am going crazy cooped up in this chariot!
****************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
My avatar on the moon reported that there is no trace of Gummy in the Immortal records... it's a sign of how jumpy I am that I even asked. However, there is a crocodile-shaped artifact the same size as Gummy, the Idol of Sebek. But it doesn't look like Gummy either.
Sebek is one of Ka's... proteges, I guess is the right word. He is the immortal patron of the Gator-Men of western Brun. Who are relatives of lizard men, I believe.
My moon-self was reading about Sebek, who I have never met face to face, during one of her work breaks, when Mother walked in. In human form; my moon-self is also in human form because it's easier to do the library work that way. But this was her female human form; usually she's a man when in human flesh. She was tall and tanned with long red hair; Mother always has red hair unless she deliberately trying to fully hide who she is.
"I hear that you're investigating Pinkie's cute little pet, the living artifact," Mother said, sitting down next to me at the table and studying the book. "If you want to meet Sebek, I can set it up."
"This me cannot leave the library until my penance is fully done," I told her. "As you know."
"I could arrange for your *other* avatar to meet Sebek," Mother said, laughing softly, which irritated me. "Or Sebek could be really radical and *come here*."
"I was just following up a line of investigation, just to be sure," I told her.
"I doubt Gummy is keeping away the Shadow Ponies; he isn't *that* kind of artifact," Mother said, waving a hand. "He'd be more likely to cause everything in the Adri Varna to swarm over you, trying to get him. He's rather dangerous to keep around, though I suppose the Ponies are the safest people to handle him."
"Mother, you've tried to claim he caused the previous generation of Immortals to kill each other in the Immortal Storm and I still don't believe it," I told her. Mother sometimes lies outrageously, then sticks to it for centuries just to try to get you to believe it so she can laugh at you.
I'm not that foolish *now*.
"Not just the Immortals; endless species have died fighting over the Gummy," Mother said urgently and I sighed. Hopefully, she won't appear to her followers in Hule and tell them they must acquire the Gummy at all costs, in order to make her lies true.
"Since you are spying on me again, can you tell me what Immortals the Shadow Ponies of the Adri Varna serve?" I asked her.
"Thanatos and Orcus are the two most common, but some of them serve Kalifa because they are greedy. If he had not failed in his quest for immortality, Sombra would probably rule them all. But he failed in his quest and vanished with the Crystal Empire." Mother frowned deeply at that. "And even we Immortals do not know where it went... or at least, if any do, they are not telling." Mother only likes secrets if she knows them and others do not.
I loved him once and he betrayed me. He will taste my wrath if I see him again, but I expect he has long ago re-incarnated, perhaps many times. Probably no one knows where the Crystal Empire's capital went because it was just annihilated.
But we have to see for sure. After the incident in the dungeon the Immortality Mark Crusaders made, I have to be sure.
"Mama," a voice said from Mother's pocket and now a little firey head poked out.
"You'd better get back in before the librarians see you and try to douse you," Mother said gently, pushing his head back into her pocket. "He and about a dozen of his siblings escaped from Rathanos' little creche and are wandering around, setting Immortals' homes on fire. Being their loving mother, I agreed to round them up in return for a few favors."
That's Mother.
My break was up, so I returned to work and helped Mother find some records on events in Skothar during the fall of the Thonian empire. I don't know if she was sincere, giving me a hint, trying to trick me or what. Maybe she really does have some interest in it. Thankfully, her 'child' didn't escape and burn the library, though I distantly heard a siren going off to the east as she left.
The Thonians were quite unlucky; one of the first human civilizations, they got eventually overthrown and assimilated by their own colony, Blackmoor, and then the survivors all became psychic after the Rain of Fire. I've never been there, only heard stories.
Really, as Immortals go, I've hardly gotten to do anything because first I focused on Equestria and then I was in lockdown for a thousand years due to being an idiot. And I'm still on probation, which is why one of me is stuck in this library.
But at least I like libraries, so it's a step forwards.
*****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
There is black and then there is Black and then there is BLACK. Utter, inescapable darkness. Most of the Adri Varna is not black, despite constantly radiating evil; it's mostly shadows of brown and orange and red, patches of gravel and boulders and sand and sometimes outcroppings and some algae-filled lakes which none-the-less have some of the only *green* anywhere. The lakes are typically surrounded by a five to ten mile belt of green and orange plants, and even *grass*.
Evil grass, because apparently everything here is made of the many colors of evil.
But as we approached where our map said the Crystal Empire's capital had once been, there were no ruins, just more rocks, gravel, cacti, evil cacti, really evil cacti, and so on, *except* for a shimmering pool of *utter* BLACKNESS.
It was about a hundred feet wide and was utterly creepy, so of course we landed near it, but not on it, atop a dirty rock outcropping the size of Ponyville. There was another such outcropping maybe a half mile northwest of the outcropping, which was east of the POOL OF BLACKNESS.
Cadence watched it warily. "It's so horrible," she said softly, before getting out of the chariot.
I make that point because the second she stepped out of it, light spread around her hooves and then shot down the side of the upcropping and spread, forming this huge web of light on the surface of the ground and everyone stared and Princess Luna's breath caught. Cadence's cutiemark began to glow brightly and now it was like this huge web of glowing streets, circling the black pool and spreading out and...
When it ran up the other outcropping, the light rose upwards and now you could see a shimmering translucent beautiful palace of crystal, rising upwards with its five towers at its five corners.
"The Crystal Palace," Cadence said, eyes wide.
"Is that... good? Or bad? Or both?" Spike asked.
"We shall see," Princess Luna said. "This pool of entropy sits in the middle of what was once the Plaza of Friendship, the heart of the city. The Crystal Heart was brought here once a year to be recharged and many ceremonies were held here."
"The heart is inside the Palace," Cadence said softly. "I can feel it."
I touched Cadence's cutie mark. "So what exactly is this Crystal Heart?"
"It was an ancient artifact made by Valerias," Princess Luna said, conjuring a shimmering image of it; it was just like Cadence's mark except larger. "It protected the Crystal Empire, but it had to be recharged once a year in order to maintain its strength, in a grand ceremony of the people, led by their queen. That ceremony was interrupted by Sombra's attempted coup. If we can recover it, it would be a great thing. Though now there are few Crystal Ponies left; most vanished when the Kingdom fell, as far as anyone knows."
"I guess we should check out the Palace, then," I said, studying it; it looked beautiful but also kind of ghostly. "Also, I assume this all is going to be a big 'HELLO, SAILOR' to the Shadow Ponies." I studied the horizon but saw no one.
"I fear so," Princess Luna said. "Ivan, let us study the pool."
He nodded and we advanced on it; Cadence hung back, looking sick and Spike stood between her and the pool, standing guard. I followed Princess Luna and Ivan because I was curious; as we approached, the surface began to ripple despite there being no wind and no rocks thrown in it, though... "Should I try throwing a rock?"
"No," Princess Luna said, frowning at it. "What do you feel, Ivan?"
"Not much." He touched his necklace. "Except that it has immortal power sealing it."
Princess Luna lifted her right forehoof and drew runes in the air of red flame, studied them, and sighed. Unfortunately, they went away before I could try roasting a hot dog for Ivan over them! A joke wasted, but I could still try it later.
I didn't plan any good jokes for black pools of evil. Maybe something with a pie...
I was still thinking when Princess Luna said, "Best we not risk freeing something horrible. Let us go to the Palace."
The pool rippled again and I waggled my tail at it. "You can try to scare us with ripples later, okay?" I assume it's probably disappointed we didn't even scream.
Cadence slowly relaxed... well, got less totally tense... as we moved away from it.
The palace was beautiful, with huge marble and crystal steps leading up to it. Best of all, it began to chime musically and I soon realized I could *play music* and began scampering up and down it.
"Pinkie, you're telling everyone for miles we're here," Princess Luna said, but now Spike joined me and soon Cadence was doing it.
"It's too late, what Cadence did definitely told everyone," Ivan said, sighing... and then joined the music-fest! Thanks, Ivan!
Princess Luna just watched us for a little while, then hesitantly did some stepping and soon led us in a rousing tune and as we played the steps, the music got louder and stronger and the palace grew more and more solid and I smiled brightly.
"Look!" Spike said. He pointed and now we could see a whole shimmering translucent city and I stared and then smiled.
"It cannot be so easy," Princess Luna said softly but now she looked around and looked at Cadence. "We can experiment more, later. I want to check the palace while we can."
Cadence nodded and led us to the top. There were great gates and...no way to pull them open.
Princess Luna's horn glowed, but then she frowned. "The palace is sealed, I think by the crown's power. I can open the ward, but the palace will then be defenseless."
"Well, I think my power somehow called it back from where it was hiding," Cadence said hesitantly. "Maybe it will hide again."
"Well, either we break the wards or else we go play with the steps or maybe pretend to be scared so the pool doesn't feel it's a failure," I mused.
"I think we don't need to accommodate any feelings the pool might have," Princess Luna said, shaking her head. "Cadence, can you sense any other creatures here? Ivan?"
Ivan can sense creatures? He fiddled with his necklace, then said, "Nothing this can detect is around or it's hidden very well."
"There is no love here but ours," Cadence said after looking everywhere. "Save a little in all that glows now. But that came from me."
"Do you sense anything, Gummy?" I asked him; he was peeking out of my saddlebags.
Gummy made a gurgling noise, so I fed him some dried fish. Then he sank back into the saddlebag out of sight.
I wish I had studied more about the Crystal Empire; I feel a little... I'm really not so sure why I am here. Trying to boost morale, but...
If I think about it, this is all kind of creepy.
So I had better not think.
Spike was waving his arms around and his eyes were shut and I watched him curiously and imitated him but it didn't do anything. I think.
"No sign of Dragon magic," Spike reported.
"You can sense that now?" I asked him.
"Prince Jagger set up a correspondence course for me to learn some dragon secret magic stuff," Spike said excitedly. "After I helped him in Glantri. I'm not very far into it; it's really hard, but I have learned a few tricks." He sounded very proud of himself. "Cadence has been helping me practice."
It was then that I distantly heard something whisper 'Crystals...'
"Did you hear that?" I asked, looking around.
"Hear what?" Ivan asked.
"Someone whispering about crystals," I told them. "It could be my imagination, though."
Ivan grimaced, touched the hilt of his hammer, then drew it and concentrated. "No orcs or goblins, but there's a lot of gems inside the palace, which we kind of could have guessed." He sighed, waving Whelm around. "Something was in that dungeon the kids made a while back. Which also had an interest in 'crystals'."
"Well, he came to the right place," I said. "Hello, mysterious voice, how about if you come out and say hi? I'm Pinkie Pie, nice to meet you!"
My kind greeting was unfortunately ignored.
We stared out across the landscape, studying everything. Shimmering buildings, but no people, glowing roads, the evil pool... "Could the pool have somet... but no, how would it... how would it even *know* to mess with the kids' dungeon?"
"My fear is that it is Sombra and the kids' use of shadow magic, in which he was versed, somehow let him reach there, though why *their* use, I don't know," President Luna said, shuffling on her hooves. "Unless maybe he knew it would draw me here."
"Well, if it's a trap, we might as well jump in and enjoy it," I said. "It's that, the pool, or we go back and wait, see what happens, basically, right?"
"You sum it up well, Pinkie," Princess Luna said, then looked at Cadence.
"I must see," Cadence said softly. "And surely Sombra is no match for you now."
"If I unleash my immortal power," Princess Luna said. "But without permission of the Council of Intrusion, that would mean being punished again, if not so long for a lesser offense. Here, I am strong but there are mortals who could outmatch me or at least equal me. But Pinkie is right. We must either seize this chance or else leave and come back with more or not at all. And if the Crown and the Heart can be recovered, it will be worth it." She paused, thoughtfully. "Actually, let me try something first. Pinkie, you must tell the funniest joke you can think of."
"Ooooooh," I said, then realized... the funniest... "That depends on the audience. I mean... o/~ how much wood can a dragon hoard? o/~," I began singing.
Spike sang, o/~ From the very first plank, he grows more board o/~
We both began to laugh as we went through all ten verses while the others stared, though Cadence tittered a little.
"Dragons make songs about puns?" Ivan said in surprise.
"See, Spike loved it but the rest of you, not so much," I said. "Whereas..." I studied Princess Luna and tried to remember jokes about Immortals... which you could repeat to one... And to mixed company... and... this is going to be hard.
Okay, here's one I don't get at all. "How does Halav cook the meat he collects on his hunts?"
Ivan blinked. "I... well, when he was mortal, Petra would have cooked it..." Now he had that Twilight look. The one where she has a puzzle and she *must* defeat it.
"I can cook some stuff with my fire," Spike said proudly. "Or light a fire to cook. But I guess Halav doesn't hang with me much."
"Much," Cadence said softly, smiling.
Spike grumbled.
Princess Luna also had the scrunchy look, then sighed. "There are many answers, none funny."
"He tells Rathanos that this meat is superior to energy beings and then after Rathanos sets everything on fire for twenty-five minutes, it's all roasted to perfection!" I finished. I don't quite get it, but I think they will.
Ivan and Princess Luna began laughing loudly. Cadence said hesitantly, "Isn't that too dangerous a way to cook?"
"He could have just come to me and I'd make *way* less of a mess," Spike said, shaking his head.
"I don't get it either," I whispered to Cadence, who now laughed softly and gently tapped my side with a hoof. I grinned at the acknowledgement.
"Hey, Sombra! There's only one letter between dark magic and DORK magic and I think you misspelled that *long ago*!" I shouted, then worried that was too mean. But I need to provoke him into reacting.
That got everyone in my group to laugh and I heard a distant, angry rumble.
"I bet he's hiding in the pit," I said very softly. "Maybe locked into it, even."
Princess Luna nodded, licked her lips precisely once in a single swipe, then sighed and her horn glowed. And then the doors swung open and we stepped inside.
*****************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
The Palace is as beautiful as the last time I saw it, before Queen Counterpoint was betrayed by Sombra. Before it vanished. Before I destroyed my old self in my stupidity.
The grand entrance hall could easily hold a hundred ponies or more. Huge steps led up to the second floor and tapestries hung on the walls, showing the many glorious deeds of past Queens and Kings of the Empire. I lingered for a moment, studying Lightning Flash, who saved the Crystal Empire from a hideous magical storm and served as its fourth Emperor. He sent aid to us when we revolted against the Orcs. From that point on, our lands were friends.
Until whatever happened, happened. There are no ponies here. Just a shadow of the palace. This is like shadow magic, but with *light*. I had not thought such a thing possible.
I will admit I am intrigued; it was not something the Crystal Ponies were known for in the past. It is some strange form of the Sphere of Matter's power; the Crystal Heart was originally made by Valerias for another civilization now fallen; she did not intervene to stop them when the Crystal Ponies were guided to it. Given her interest in love, I would assume she approved of the uses to which it was put.
But it is the Crown, whose origins are unknown, at least to me, which intrigues me most. We only know it pre-dated the Immortal Storm.
Did I hear a voice mumble 'crystals', or did I imagine it?
Grand galleries spread out east, west and northwards; I think northwards is things like kitchens and staff housing. Just a little east is the grand dining room; a little west is the grand audience room; various guest rooms, libraries, and so on spread out along the east and west wings.
Spike paused, concentrated, then said proudly, "No sign of dragons except me."
Cadence began a soft song, her horn glowing. Pinkie hummed counterpoint and began studying the tapestries herself. "Wait, Flash Fry was a Crystal Pony?" she said in shock.
I came over curiously; you could see a Crystal Pony shoveling fuel into a furnace where crystals were glowing redhot. There was no name on it, and I studied it curiously. "I don't know this one," I confessed.
"I think I remember studying about various famous Pony crafters and this is Flash Fry, who developed methods for working with crystal, but somehow no one mentioned he was a Crystal Pony. Maybe I just didn't pay enough attention," Pinkie said, sighing. Then she whispered to me, "I was trying to write a poem about cheese for composition class that day."
I smiled a little at that. "Uncle Full Moon was giving us a talk one day and Celestia was very hungry and kept thinking about food, so when he asked why the Nithians made trolls, her reply was 'a tasty lettuce and mayonnaise sandwich'." I laughed loudly and so did Pinkie.
"That's GREAT... can I actually tell that one?" Pinkie asked.
"Of course," I said. Celestia will just laugh I'm sure.
Pinkie danced happily as Spike stood by Cadence, looking around and Ivan studied all the tapestries. I gestured to Ivan, who came back to me. "No sign of traps or anything."
I didn't expect any. "Let's visit the audience hall," I said, knowing it wouldn't be that easy to find everything there.
"Hold on, let me finish searching," Cadence said, waving a hoof, so I waited, impatient for action and trying to feel for if anything of Entropy... or any other Sphere... was coming in.
They were too subtle for me if they were.
Cadence said, "Up the stairs."
So up the stairs we went; like the steps outside, they played music as you trod them and Pinkie went up and down, composing a tune on the fly; she has incredible talent. I can sing but I am no great composer or performer.
And it is far too late to hide our presence.
The stairs supported our weight; I had been worried but everything seems solid enough, even if it doesn't look quite *real*.
We passed through grand hallways and still no people, no monsters, no sign of what happened. Was this the Palace or was it just an illusion of it? A very good one if so.
Hoofbeats and foot... footbeats? Footsteps... Anyway, you could hear us walking, for all was silent. So silent it disturbed me greatly; the Adri Varna in general is eerily silent unless something is trying to kill you. But silence is normally rare in nature.
I thought back to the tapestry... I sent my other avatar to look up Flash Fry, though probably there is nothing about him in the Library of Pandius. Only Celestia and I have put much pony-related there and I have not made a deposit... well, in a thousand years.
I slept through a lot of it; they have to keep your power drained so you can't break free and wreak havoc. But this tends to knock you out a lot of the time. Imprisonment is actually rare, though; usually you're bound to some kind of service, from being a faux artifact to having to run herd on some immortal's followers to just being a maidservant/butler. Before he went off on the trip he still hasn't returned from, Sinbad was forced to herd pigs for a hundred years for Halav, I know. There's a lot of argument over whether Sinbad is dead, trapped in another Dimension, or just on a *really* long trip. Mother thinks he may have found the way to become one of the Old Ones.
He took me to see the Empyrean Reaches, before I became an idiot. They were beautiful and strange, with worlds made of glittering diamonds and one world which was a giant braided rope with plant-people living on it and those nebulas and...
But we don't have time for that story. I hope that wherever he is, he's finding new wonders. Duty meant I couldn't go with him on further trips.
I probably should have; maybe I wouldn't have...
Ivan touched my right shoulder and I forced myself back to here and now. "Thank you," I said softly to him.
He nodded and now I saw we'd reached a closed door; it was labelled 'Library'. Ooooh.
"I can scout ahead," Ivan said.
"A good idea," Cadence said. "We are very close to the Crown."
In the Library? Well, we'll see. "Do it," I told Ivan and he vanished into my shadow. I smiled a little at that.
Uncle Full Moon taught me that trick long ago and now I have passed it on to his protege. I felt a tingle of pride at it. Let us just hope it doesn't get him in trouble.
*****************
Ivan's Scouting Report:
I emerged between two book cases; they were translucent but I could make out a great source of ever-shifting light elsewhere. I dropped low and crawled, then stuck my head out a little into the aisle. There were tables and someone who at least looked like an alicorn stood by it. She was blue and translucent and wore a great crown on her head. She was frozen in a pose of panic as a huge black unicorn loomed over her, wearing a silver headpiece etched with black runes and armor studded with opals. He was translucent, but... the art of the Crystal Ponies did make them look translucent naturally, due to appearing to be made of crystal. But he looked different, like he was made of solid blackness but had been made translucent by whatever this thing is going on here.
She had books on the table, and parchment she'd been writing on when he made his attack; you could see a dozen other Crystal Ponies, apparently his allies, but looking like fairly normal ones. All frozen in place.
And the crown... did it have a crack in it? A tiny sliver of blue light was leaking out of the crack, but frozen in the air...
The Crown was connected to the Sphere of Time and...
Had it somehow frozen this moment of time? But how would the Crystal Empire vanish from that?
And how can we move around inside it?
I paused and touched Whelm and activated its powers; the Empress... I assume that's the Empress, triggered the gem detection powers of Whelm, which made me smile.
If I had more range, I might have found her from the gateway itself, but I think it can only get up to about 200 feet and this place is *huge*.
Wait, if the moment is frozen in time, then why haven't we seen anyone else?
I'll leave the metaphysics to Luna and go back and report.
******************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
Ivan finished his report. I tapped my cheek with a hoof thoughtfully. "So, Cadence summoned this place into existing by touching the ground. She's got an artifact of the Crystal Empire as her *cutie mark*. Is she the secret heir or something?" I asked.
"Maybe," Cadence said. "I had refugee ancestors, but I am not a Crystal Pony. Maybe my fate is to bring the Heart to Equestria or something." She shuffled on her hooves.
I donned my Consulting Detective disguise: hunting cap, shoulder capelet that serves no apparent purpose, meerschaum pipe and magnifying glass. I began to intently study the door. Spike said, "Pinkie, what are you doing?"
"Looking for clues. We have a mystery and we need clues. Because I think once we enter that room, it's going to set off time travel or we'll all youthen into babies or something," I told Spike.
Spike concentrated. "Oooh, there's something with draconic power in there!" Now he really scrunched up his face and clenched his fists and kind of hunched over as if trying to will himself through the door.
I know, I got that face when Father would make me sit in the corner when he didn't like what I'd done and I'd tried to will myself to teleport and it never worked.
Normally, I would have imitated him, but *Detective Pinkie* is on the job.
Detective Pinkie doesn't get to be ludicrous.
Wait, I could feel something tickling my memory...
Something from *Bard School*.
Flashback, TAKE ME AWAY!
********************
********************
Flashback to Bard School:
Hairy Hardcase was, well, definitely hard to amuse. I studied him carefully as our teacher blathered on about something neither funny nor cool, so I studied his dun coat and his lump of granite cutie mark; a terrible cutie mark for a bard and really not much good for anyone but a rock farmer.
"The Crystal Ponies built huge crystal spires which drew down the power of the Five Spheres for their own use," Bard Laurel or whatever his title is... Let's just call him BL Far Traveller... Anyway, the teacher rambled on about the Crystal Ponies.
There had to be *some* way to make Hardcase laugh.
Hardcase scribbled notes with a pencil in his mouth. I just let my perfect, flawless memory soak up the lecture subconsciously so I could focus on important things like how to make this grumpy pony *laugh*. What kind of bard doesn't like humor?
He's more stereotypical rock farmer than my parents!
"These pillars fried the brains of people who did not do the assigned reading," BL Far Traveller said, doodling on the board as I carefully began designing the FUN MACHINE which would enable *anyone* to laugh.
I glanced over and saw Pink Flamingo (who hates me for no reason at all!) and Melody Dancer (who likes me) busy covertly reading some scroll together while pretending to take notes.
Definitely a better use of your time than this boring class.
"Their giant warmachines rolled out across Brun, conquering everything and bringing them back as slaves to serve the Crystal Empire FOREVER," BL Far Traveller said, doodling on the board more.
I could see half the class taking notes silently; the other half were all goofing off, unlike me. My project is *serious*, though I now realized that 'funstone' is not real and thus my entire project collapsed.
This would be easier if BL Far Traveller didn't talk so much. He's ruining my concentration!
"By 800 BC, half of Brun bowed to the Crystal Empire; they even forced Celestia into a giant hamster wheel to further power their Primal Engines," BL Far Traveller said; his doodle of Celestia in a giant crystal hamster wheel forgot the framework! That is a giant crystal hamster *ball*, which can't actually turn a crank and thus generate work.
I had to turn my poor hamsters free after my uncle tried to convince Father to make them grind grain. Best to take no chances.
"Sir!" Cloud Walker said urgently. He's a Pegasus. I think his family help make clouds or rainbows or rain or something in Cloudsdale. He has this long purple stripe down the middle of his mane but also on his yellow coat all the way to *just* before his tail from some manufacturing accident which convinced him to become a bard.
BL Far Traveller had been slouching and whining as he was prone to do. But now he straightened out. "Go on, Cloud Walker."
"You drew a hamster ball; if you don't connect it with an axle, then it's not a hamster wheel and it can't generate useful work," Cloud Walker said. "So there needs to be an axle added to the sketch, otherwise, Celestia could roll the ball off across the countryside and escape, unless you're about to tell us she did that."
I have never before or since seen the expression on BL Far Traveller's face. It was as if he was trying to be happy *and* despairing simultaneously, which you can't do.
"Any other comments?" BL Far Traveller said hopefully as he corrected the sketch.
"No, sir, I only caught that because my uncle was running a shift in a device much like this one in Cloudsdale and the axle broke and he rolled through a doorway and nearly fell off Cloudsdale before they managed to save him." Cloud Walker shuddered. "Anyway, I'm sorry to interrupt but axles have been big in my family since then."
BL Far Traveller nodded, sighed, then asked, "Anyone else have any questions or comments?"
Abject silence ensued, which let me suddenly make a break through. I could build a wheel and run on it to fling pies at super-high speed, far faster than with my mouth or tail! Surely if I hit Hairy with enough pies, he would laugh.
Or at least, I would.
The lecture went on; something about how the Crystal Ponies pulled down Ixion and made him shine their shoes and forced Asterius to do their accounting and made Odin their butler.
Surely you would want to make Ixion light rooms for you or something. The Immortal of the Sun would be wasted as a bootblack. You'd want someone like... I don't know. Orcus' black blood of hate would probably make shoes VERY black.
Then, just as I had finished my pie-flinging design, BL Far Traveller shouted, "LIES! LIES! IT'S ALL LIES! None of you did the reading, you're all zombies who just sit there and believe whatever LUDICROUS CRAP you are told! This generation of Bards is going to be more like LARDS!" Then he galloped out of the room shouting about his schedule and how introductory classes suck.
I would have been surprised, but all of his lectures ended like that and then they made him take a vacation.
********************
********************
The Dark Pinkie Returns... The *Detective* Pinkie returns:
Princess Luna was looking at with a look I know well. It's Father's 'you are made of failure' look. Mother would actually chew me out when she didn't like what I did. Father would just look at me and it was far worse.
But then she sighed. "But thank you for trying. I didn't know you could project illusions, Pinkie." I...
What?
"I... you all saw that?" I said in shock.
Ivan stared off down the hallway with a weird look on his face. Cadence nodded. "It was a projection of light next to you, about five by five feet across, so smaller than actual events, but we could hear you narrate the whole thing. What a terrible teacher. None of mine ever did such a thing."
"I dunno, it looked to me like the students couldn't be bothered to actually think about anything he said and just either ignored him or were note-taking zombies," Spike said. "I mean, Twilight would totally do that, but then she'd probably accidentally turn them into cacti or something." He shook his head. "Well, not now. She's got good control now, but man, I remember the time she tried to cook dinner faster and somehow she cooked it backwards and everything turned back into milk and celery plants and cabbages and so on."
As he said this, you could see the incident happening next to him and everyone watched.
Cadence cocked her head, concentrated and we could now see a little kiddy Twilight playing in a ball pit... then panicking and starting to drown along with baby Spike, until Cadence stepped in.
Ivan laughed... we all laughed and it felt good. Then Ivan concentrated and you could see Marcus covered in melted cheese, running away from a flaming salamander, howling about something and we all laughed even more at that.
Any of us could make the past play out, which made me feel less special but made more sense than me just spontaneously developing illusion powers.
Though I would *totally* go for illusion powers.
I know some bard songs to make simple illusions but half the time I forget I have them after being lectured so many times by mother that Earth Pony Magic was different from Unicorn Magic and no, you can't learn it, you have to be born with it.
But being a Bard lets me cheat.
When old habits don't lick... kick in.
Hehe.
By the way, a 'guitar lick' is *not* what it sounds like. Guitars taste *awful*.
"This must be some big spell," Ivan said. "There's a frozen version of that trick inside the library. Maybe it's a warning?"
I tried making a memory appear, then freeze in place. "Yeah, you can make these freeze," I said. "Oooh and the building is all here because the Empress knew the layout but not who was there, so there's no actual ponies to be seen outside the room!" I tapped my pipe. I felt as smart as Twilight.
Princess Luna nodded approvingly. "Cadence, do you feel anything special here?"
"She had so much love for her people," Cadence said softly, staring at the door and then slumping a little. Even her hair drooped. "I think she has a message for us."
"Then we should go and listen," I said, taking off my detective outfit. "This case is solved, but now we must listen to the will."
You have to solve the murder before the will can be read, in case the killer did it to get their inheritance early, right? Or they might abscond with the wealth!
Just as I was about to push the door open, Spike suddenly coughed up a scroll in a burst of flame. It was from Twilight; he held a hand up, read it quickly, then sighed. "I'll write her back after this. She was worried I wasn't brushing my teeth enough, but look," he said, then showed off his pearly whites. They were shiny enough I could nearly see my reflection. "Yesterday, she was worried I was using the wrong kind of scale polish."
"She frets because she loves you," Cadence said, then nuzzled Spike, who turned a little red. "And misses you."
"Yeah," he said and sighed. "I'm not ready yet, but... well, having cool stuff to do helps a lot. Especially now that I'm *finally* getting some dragon abilities."
"Your ability to ward against dragons last time was critical to our success," Princess Luna said. "It will take many years for you to come into your full power, as it did for Celestia and I. But with time, you will be mighty."
"I just wish... I ought to have wings by now," Spike grumbled.
"I wanted wings like Grandma Pie when I was a kid," I told him, patting his shoulder. "I tried to make my own but it didn't go so well and Grandma Pie had to save me."
"And then you invented your gyrocopter," Princess Luna said approvingly. "If you had not decided to be a Bard, you might have made a good Artificer."
"Thanks," I told her, smiling. "But I don't think I could come up with enough inventions if I had to create them all the time. Anyway... are we going in?"
"Nothing horrible happened when I went in," Ivan said.
"We will take the chance; best to deal with any crisis while we are still fresh," Princess Luna said, then pushed the door open.
I bounced in first, studying the books casually; Twilight will want to know what all of them are and I can at least remember a few for her. Though I'm surprised Princess Luna didn't ask her to join this team.
But I'm glad I came - easily visible flashbacks! Now I have to find some way to do it outside this magical palace illusion thing.
It didn't smell like a library, I realized; this whole place is nothing but light solidified. A frozen moment in time.
I wish I'd paid more attention in Bard School; I get distracted too easily. I could see everything now, the frozen moment of the attack. But I wouldn't have recognized it at all without everything Luna's told me on this trip.
Dash might actually know all this stuff now with all the reading she's doing.
But staring at this, I could feel BL Far Traveller freaking out at me again.
I suddenly wondered if Pinkamena knows this kind of thing, the lore you're supposed to learn in Bard School but which I mostly blew off because I was more interested in music and making people happy. Which I *excel* at, and you can't be good at everything, but...
I guess this is why I am lucky to have friends. Princess Luna is like Twilight, but grumpier. Suddenly, I am wondering if Luna sneaks off to that 'Vampire Convention' Twilight went to where everyone pretends to be vampires like in those romance novels she pretends not to read.
Twilight pretending she hasn't read something is *hilarious*. I read two of them myself just so I could say wrong things about them and get her to correct me.
Rarity would probably make a great vampire.
Focus, Pinkie! This could be dangerous, funny, or both and in all three cases, I need to be here and now.
In the here and now, Ivan stood by Luna, a hand on her back, while Cadence lurked at the edge of the bookshelves with Spike between her and the illusion.
Then suddenly, it flickered and advanced maybe three seconds in time. We all jumped and then it played out before us, a cloud of darkness coming from Sombra's mouth as he said, "Give me the Crown, or you will fall into the Pit of Banishment! I have summoned it and only I can banish it!"
I'm guessing that's the pit of evil outside.
"Where the Carnifex are imprisoned?" Spike said in shock.
Sombra now made a statuette float in front of himself, an obsidian statuette that looked kind of like an adult version of Spike. Assuming Spike stayed with his current humanish looking dragon form but got older. "I possess the Key of the Pit of Banishment, created before the Immortal Storm!"
So, big mojo. It looked so real now, but everyone was ignoring us and one of Sombra's ponies moved *through* Luna without noticing her.
But the Crown was leaking blue light, which could *not* be good.
I tapped Luna and pointed, *just* in case she hadn't noticed.
She'd noticed and I now remember Ivan had reported that. Ivan was breathing hard, watching this.
Then rays of blue, red, white, brown, and black light fired out of the crown and wrapped around the key and they had a Unicorn horn fight! The crown was stronger than Sombra... but now the other Ponies attacked the queen, though two galloped to guard the door. Queen Counterpoint howled Luna's name and Sombra shouted something incoherent through the storm of magic and then the leaking blue light *exploded*, rushing over everything, smashing the assaulting ponies back through the walls and you could see them all topple into the black pit of darkness, but the statuette flew off into the air and vanished and now suddenly, EVERYTHING except the pit was gone and we all fell a story, which wasn't fun at all.
"Did the crown explode?" Spike asked, rubbing his butt.
Cadence's breath caught; something rose into the air near her... the Key to the Pit of Banishment, solid and real.
"She called my name," Luna said, quietly, staring at the key. "She didn't know I had fallen. She still trusted in me."
Cadence passed the Key to Luna. "Do you know what this is?"
"The Pit of Banishment was created by the Immortals who lived before the Immortal Storm, but sat empty by the end of it. The Immortals used it to imprison the Carnifex, a race originally created by the Dragon Immortals to serve the Dragons; the Carnifex rebelled and took over the Draconic states and enslaved the Dragons and sought to enslave the Immortals as well, so they were banished into the Pit and it was sealed. I did not know there was a literal key to it until now, though," Princess Luna said. "We must leave at once and take it to Canterlot."
"I have an idea," I said to Princess Luna. "I can make the key invisible to help hide it."
She looked at me curiously and I produced my invisible ink and the pen that comes with it. "We just coat it in this!"
Princess Luna studied it, horn glowing, then smiled. "Let's test if that will work."
In fact, dunking it in the ink with Luna's telekinesis caused the ink to churn and... it was still visible when it came out. I sighed. "I guess you have to use the pen."
But you couldn't actually write on it, I now found. "Oh man."
"Princess, look out!" Cadence shouted and fired a beam of light from her horn into the air; you could see something that looked like Sombra, if he was the size of an Alicorn, diving down, crackling with green lightning. But dodging her shot meant he missed all of us but now he lashed out and snagged the key with his magic, pulling it to himself; to my shock, he overcame Princess Luna's power!
We're in serious trouble.
Especially as we could now see hundreds of Shadow Ponies closing in.
I put the invisible ink container in my saddlebag; it made weird clinky noises as I did so but I didn't have time to investigate. "Gummy, whatever you do, *don't drink this*," I told him. I'd stoppered it but that didn't stop him drinking an entire bottle of blueberry syrup one time.
"Spike, ride Cadence, Ivan, ride me," Princess Luna commanded; they did so and we took off running as the Shadow Ponies charged and Sombra cackled in the air.
"I am FREE! And now I will open the way for the destruction of all those who betrayed me! We will capture the Crystal Empire and I will remake it as it always should have been, without the weaknesses which crippled me!" Sombra cackled as he fired green lightning at us, which Princess Luna parried with her powers.
Ivan threw his hammer at Sombra and it... imagine if a person was made out of water and you hit them with something. He rippled and distorted and the hammer went through him, then looped back around to Ivan's hands. "Without its mates, Whelm alone has little power!" Sombra cackled. "Remember, she will abandon you as she abandoned me, little human!"
"I carried out our stupid plan and got imprisoned for a thousand years!" Princess Luna shouted angrily as she galloped and Shadow Ponies drew closer and I could hear the chariot pulling ponies fighting Shadow Ponies trying to seize our chariot.
The Shadow Ponies were going to cut us off, unless...
What is the opposite of Entropy? Hope and Laughter. Entropy says all things are doomed, but Hope says that the sun will always rise again and Laughter finds joy in anything, even losing. Even defeat. So I began to laugh and tell jokes and try to do pratfalls... that wouldn't leave me behind to get eaten.
I could hear the Shadow Ponies make unhappy noises while Princess Luna and Sombra argued over who betrayed who and whose new coltfriend is going to betray who or be betrayed and... Too much angst.
That's all I can say.
Ivan was ranting about Halav AGAIN for some reason, so I took out a pie and shouted to Cadence, "Power this pie up!"
She blinked, but now she linked to it and magic flowed into the pie. Oh yeah. I threw the silly string onto the pie in the desperate hope that maybe this time, just once the string would be silly.
I should have asked to bring my Element but it usually sits in the vault... and I'd probably just lose it if I kept it. But it would be *helpful* here.
"The Carnifex will not serve you, Sombra!" Princess Luna shouted. "If you release them, they will destroy you and everyone else! They believe they are the rightful masters of the world!"
"With the Crown, I could have made them obey," Sombra said, then launched into some boring rant about power and lore and ancient stuff.
So I hit him with the hurled pie and he stopped short and began flailing at his face, trying to get it off, pie covering his *evil eyes*, though now the evil began burning the pie off. He also screamed like someone falling off a mountain. The bad kind of falling off a mountain.
I laughed and laughed and laughed and...
Then I saw the chariot fly into the air. In pieces.
Uh oh.
The two chariot pullers flew over and landed by us. Anchor Star and Loose Grip are Bat-ponies, Pegasi who wear special armor that makes them look bat-like. Luna likes bats, I guess. "I am very sorry," Loose Grip said, bowing to Luna. "I can carry Mistress Pie if we want to attempt a flying escape."
"We should fight our way out!" Anchor Star said, glaring at the Shadow Ponies. "Running away does not befit the dignity of a Princess!"
I had an idea. "Can you speak to Efreeti, Princess Luna?"
She blinked. "Yes."
I whipped out the box and pushed the button, ready for my flank-kicking but maybe Princess Luna can cut a deal with him.
Here goes nothing!
*****************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
Pinkie fell down as an Efreet appeared, a tall red-skinned humanoid with white horns and fangs; he's about fifteen feet tall and was elegantly dressed in shades of bronze and black with a few yellow slashes. "STOP PUSHING THE BUTTON!" he shouted in Efreet.
"She doesn't know Efreet," I said to him. "My pardon, the forces of Entropy are closing in on us and our situation is dire."
The Efreet looked around at the onrushing hordes, then dodged a blast of lightning from Sombra. "Sorry, I'm only a Knight of Bronze, this is too much for me. Just tell this idiot to stop summoning me to be laughed at!"
I winced at that. "So you do not have the power of Wishes."
The Shadowponies formed a huge circle around us, about fifty feet away, forming an endless wall of bodies. But they did not advance.
"I'm afraid not. So I must depart; this is not my fight and I think I will be slain if I stay," he said. Then he hurled fire at Sombra, who dodged the attack. "Good luck!"
"If we die, the Shadowponies will get the box," I told him; I am feeling desperate; I could get us out of this with Immortal power but then I will be in trouble again. I may be able to teleport us but I fear that it might go awry with so much Entropy all around us.
Pinkie and Cadence were dancing around now, forming a sphere of.... Some kind of energy... which appeared to be holding the Shadowponies back for now. I should have brought Pinkie's Element but I worried something would go wrong and it would be lost.
I should have trusted my intuition.
The efreet was JUST about to go, then he sighed. "Dammit, they'd make things even worse." He began hurling fire at Sombra. "I can keep him busy for a little while."
"We could try shadow-walking but they would probably stop us," Ivan grumbled in Common. "So he's going to help?"
"Or the Shadow Ponies will get his box," I told Ivan, wondering what exactly the conditions on the box were.
"What are we going to do about him having the Key?" Spike asked.
"I expect he is bluffing. If he could really open the Pit of Banishment, then he would be doing that, not wasting time on us," I said loudly.
"The key is REAL!" he shouted angrily.
"Prove it," I said, forcing myself to sound serious.
"I WILL SHOW YOU ALL!" he shouted and I laughed at him. Come on, before it's too late, I thought.
He took it and flew over to the pit of blackness; I couldn't see him go in but I felt it. I expect this actually goes to what he thinks is the Pit of Banishment, rather than itself being the Pit, as I can't believe the Crystal Empire sat on top of the Pit of Banishment for centuries.
Then there was an explosion and the pit of darkness blew apart and Sombra was flung skyward out of it, screaming, as the Shadow Ponies cried out in shock, nearly deafening me; there were a lot of them.
I played a little prank on him. Hehe.
"I'm going to have to try a mass teleport," I told everyone. "But we may get scattered but without reinforcements, or me breaking the rules, I can't see another way out."
"I trust you," Ivan said to me firmly, and I smiled more. He...
I can think of such things later.
"I trust you too," Pinkie said.
"Do it," Spike said.
Cadence, still holding the things back, made gurgly noises as her circle shrank.
"GET ME OUT OF HERE!" the Efreet wailed.
"You tricked me!" Sombra shouted.
"I guess we're even!" I said. Then I wove the twelve odyllic threads necessary for a mass teleport and prayed it would work.
It would have worked.
Except the Shadow Ponies somehow thrust several more Entropy-tainted odyllic threads into it and the world turned funny colors and then, suddenly... cake.
No, really, Ivan and I were now embedded inside a giant cake; I spread my wings and we exploded out of it, covering dozens of ponies in bits of cake; we were somewhere in Equestria, though it might have been the Princesspality of Dream Valley. Many well-dressed ponies stared at Ivan and I and, embarrassed, I said, "I have come to bless this union!" I made glittering dust settle down on everyone. "May your marriage last forever!"
Then I teleported back to Canterlot with Ivan so I could try and scry and find where I lost everyone.
Hopefully nice places.
****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
The efreet and I landed in a tunnel, ten feet across; the floor was tiled in five foot squares and so were the walls; it ran a hundred feet from one door to another. Every fifty feet, there was a glowing globe in the ceiling; the ceiling was only ten feet high, so the efreet had to bend over. The efreet slapped his forehead, then began lecturing me loudly in whatever his language is.
I whipped out a plate of cupcakes.
Grumpily, he crammed them ALL in his mouth at the same time and nearly choked, so I gave him some strawberry juice; he drank it all, then sighed.
I held out his box to him; I guess he wants to go back in.
He snatched it, then held out a box, made of black metal with a golden latch. I took it and then he vanished; I guess I released him from his contract or something by giving him the box.
I opened the box... it was full of ashes. Did I just get ripped off?
Well, I can probably make a cool gag for ashes.
I sat down to have a snack before I explore; I assume Luna will find me but I am curious about where I am.
Wait, this is some kind of *organic* ashes. Which must be super-rare where Efreeti live and it's all fire everywhere all the time, I think. So everything burned up and blew away long ago; he probably thinks this is like gold and stuff.
I was feeding Gummy a treat when the door at the far end of the tunnel opened and a big hungry troll entered, saw me and rushed at me. So I ran, flipping Gummy back into the saddlebag and abandoning the food.
Fortunately, the troll stopped to EAT THE TREATS! This let me go right through the door and into the pit trap on the other side; I am nimble, so I dodged the spikes, but now the trap began to flood and my hooves skidded on the metal walls.
The good news was that I floated on top of the water and rose upwards. The bad news was now the Troll was waiting for me to reach the top. I began a lullaby but he didn't fall asleep.
It only works on the kids if...
I began tossing all my food into his maw; eventually, I ran out but THIS TIME the lullaby worked.
Only after I reached the top of the pit did I wonder why you would want the pit to flood if people could just float up on it. Did I miss something?
I was still thinking about this when I wandered into a barrage of darts in my new hallway; I bounced around but a half-dozen of them hit me anyway; it HURT and now I rolled around yelping and wishing Fluttershy was here.
I hit a wall panel and now a giant metal ball was released to roll down the hallway at me. What is this crazy place?
I ran with it chasing me right into another dart barrage. This hallway had beautiful mosaics of flowers and pretty trees, so why was it trying to turn me into a pincushion?
Then I fell into *another* pit. Oh COME ON!
I was still clinging to a spike over hungry alligators while Gummy sang a song to them when a troll, this one in a leather work outfit, came and stared down at me. "What are you doing here?" he said, frowning. "I didn't see any Ponies come in."
I put on my disguise glasses. "Pinkamena D. Scholar, Dungeon Inspector," I said, praying it would work. "This spike should have broken under my weight, sending me to fall into to my death at the hands of the alligators. And the last pit failed to drown me and instead the water helped me escape. The poison on the darts has gone DRY so I merely itch. And where is the treasure? I haven't found a single copper coin!"
Now the troll cringed. "I'm just a maintenance man, you will have to talk to the boss!"
"Pull me out," I said sternly and he did, then opened a secret door and began leading me down *safe* tunnels as I tried to figure out how I was going to bluff my way out of this.
These hallways were a lot rougher; in fact, they looked like something literally chewed its way through the rock. Xorns? Purple worm? I bet Fluttershy would know.
His claws and my hooves clicked on the floor and I tried to hit the same beat as him, but off-set, to create a complex rhythm, which worked fine until he paused and looked around in confusion. I nearly crashed into him.
"What's wrong?" I asked him.
"I keep hearing castanets," he said.
"It's just our keratin hitting the concrete," as one of my bardic instructors used to say.
"This is granite, actually," he said to me, frowning.
"It's an expression," I told him and he relaxed. "I'm an Earth Pony; I know all about rocks."
I settled for boring walking after that.
***************
After what seemed a boring infinity of walking through tunnels chewed through rock, we reached a worked segment of the tunnel; by worked, I mean it had been smoothed out and shaped with tools. This had been done to create a doorway, which had... I touched it. The door had a thin layer of adamantite over granite, but that must have cost a lot to coat it. I could feel magic in it but not what the magic did.
He... wait, I never asked his name! What's wrong with me today? "Excuse me, sir, what is your name?" I asked, trying to be Rarity-level polite.
"Grakashtarishranrakharsegrakturismphoshkabor," he said. "In Common, it means 'Valiant slayer of all wielders of fire and devourer of pathetic Elves'."
Then he knocked on the door and babbled at it; I wasn't able to keep up but the door glowed and opened. He gave a sigh of relief. "Finally. Memorizing a fifty character long password is the hardest part of this job."
You know, he's rather intelligent for a troll.
I wonder where in Mystara I am. Though if he speaks Common, I can't have gone too far, I think.
Maybe he's one of those people on the Savage Coast who get super-powers by snorting cinnamon. I don't know how, though, as the only super-power I got was drying my nose out and having to go to the doctor.
Beyond the door, we went down a short hallway to a long hallway full of doors it intersected; we walked down it to the end, to another door; he knocked, someone yelled incoherently on the other side and we entered.
A bigger troll with huge ears and dark beady eyes, wearing a giant work apron and boots and gloves sat behind a desk, busy reading paperwork and sighing. I could see a map of... a dungeon level? Probably this dungeon.
"Good morning," I said cheerfully to him. "I am Dungeon Inspector Pinkamena D. Scholar," I said, tapping my glasses. "I have come to inspect your dungeon for irregularities."
"I'm not the sort of shallowminded fool who can fall for those," the troll said angrily. "I am Grimtooth and I do not take trying to steal the secrets of my dungeon well. Who sent you?"
I decided to be honest. "Magical accident during a teleport."
"A likely story," Grimtooth said. "But you got here just in time for us to test a new design!"
"Oooh, I like new designs!" I said excitedly.
Then I wondered why his name was so short and was in Common.
"Grak, take her to room 86 on level 22, then make her try and sit in the fishing chair." Grimtooth said.
Oooh, fishing, that should be fun!
*****************
Cadence and Spike's Excellent Adventure/Disaster (Cadence):
The good news was that nice soft grass was under us. The bad news was that there was nothing but grass in all directions to the horizon and the hot sun beat down on us without shade or surcease. The grass, in fact, was so tall and untended that it would have gone over Spike's eyes if he hadn't been riding me.
"Can you send Luna a message?" I asked Spike.
I quickly wrote a note and he fire-mailed it to her. Then we began walking east in hopes of finding water or shade or *something*.
For a while, we just ambled along, until I saw a distant clump of trees and we headed for it. The clump seemed to almost grow; it was definitely an oasis around a fair sized pond perhaps a hundred yards in width. There were a handful of houses here, marked with strange runes and many tents and lizard men dwelt there; I could see two doing repairs on one of the houses. What an odd place to find lizard men.
I cast a translation spell and approached cautiously. "I am Countess Cadence of Equestria, hurled here by a magical mishap. Can you..."
They turned, saw us, and one shouted, "DEMON!", pointing at us. ...
"No, we're not demons," I said. I am rather bedraggled, but not a demon.
He began to howl and soon we were fleeing across the grasslands, with thirty lizardmen in hot pursuit. I should have brought more water; I am thirsty and hot and this was very tiring and I am not used to running.
Spike now got a letter back. "Dear Cadence and Spike," he read out loud. "Once the sun sets, I can identify your position and teleport to you; right now, I have no good way to find you. Until then, I will work on a way to find Pinkie. Please contact me if you have trouble."
I laughed nervously, then dictated a quick 'we may be lizard man chow' letter to Luna.
At least for the moment, the lizard men can't catch up to us.
*******************
Anchor Star and Loose Grip's Accidental Exile (Anchor Star):
When the weird flashes of light ended, I had a Batpony on my head and my face jammed into a table. "Loose Grip, get off my head."
We fumbled around and finally both of us were now standing on what had been a table; now the legs had broken under our weight. We both weigh twenty-eight and a half stone in full armor and I'm sure this table was just meant to hold food and books. A dozen humans in robes sat around the table, while another dozen or so humans attended them as servants. One of the robed humans had a tiny dragon, the size of a cat, curled around his neck and a second one had a blue skinned human with pointy ears... well, had something like a blue elf maybe, sitting on his lap, wearing hardly anything. The rest had left their lovers or pets at home... no, wait, a REALLY angry cat sat under one robed human's chair, hissing at us VERY angrily, though now his owner picked him up and began to pet him and make soothing noises.
"I am very sorry, men and women of Glantri," I said. I assume this is Glantri. Or Alphatia, given the high wizard content. "If you can contact Princess Luna of Equestria, she will compensate you for your table and take us home."
Hopefully we're not about to go to wizard prison; I think we could take maybe six wizards, but not twelve, not even with a surprise attack.
They gabbled at each other in languages I don't know, though it sounded like the language of the Prancian Griffons; all I can say in that language is very simple stuff like 'where is the bathroom' and 'Make way for Princess Luna'.
Then a man in green robes rose and cast a spell, then asked, "Can you understand me?"
"Yes, sir," I said and repeated, "I am very sorry, men and women of Glantri. If you can contact Princess Luna of Equestria, she will compensate you for your table and take us home."
Anchor Star and one of the wizards were eying each other in that 'let's have a fight for no reason because we're idiots' way. Which usually is a stalllion problem but Anchor Star is a mare. We get paired a lot so I can restrain her crazier ideas.
"I fear I have never heard of such a Princess or Place or of this 'Glantri'. Is that one of those tiny Italian states?" the man asked me. "I am Michael bani Jerbiton, one of the Masters of this Covenant."
"I am Lt. Loose Grip and this is Lt. Anchor Star, who needs to *stand down*," I said firmly but she ignored me. "I do not know what an Italian state is."
This is going to be one of *those* missions, I could tell.
***********
Princess Luna's Secret:
I have vast scrying powers but they only work at night. Celestia's only work during the day. It's an inheritance from Mother. Even my immortal abilities do not include scrying beyond that, to my frustration.
So on Mystara, I reported to Celestia what happened and on Pandius, I sent a message to Uncle Full Moon, since my avatar can't leave the library. Well, I could but it would get me in trouble.
He soon arrived and I told him everything. "Can you scry for them, Uncle?"
He sat down and concentrated; he has a lot of scrying abilities. I went back to my work. After a while, he frowned. "I have good news and bad news."
I sighed and stared off towards the Geography section. "Go on."
"The good news is that I just found Cadence and Spike; they're in Davania." He passed the lock to me, so I could pass it to my other avatar. "The bad news is that I can't get any kind of lock on Pinkie, Anchor Star, or Loose Grip beyond a dimensional disturbance on the Adri Varna. They may have slipped into a Parallel Prime."
So Pinkie is wandering around with a very important artifact in another universe. Well, at least I can save Cadence and Spike immediately, given they were sending me an urgent call for help.
*****************
Cadence and Spike's Excellent Adventure/Disaster (Spike):
Being hung upside down makes the blood rush to my head; Cadence either passed out or faked it; they had us both strung up from trees.
Basically, we outpaced them but they just could run *forever*, apparently, and just ran us down into the ground. So there we were, strung up apparently for a sacrifice. They danced around and chanted and drew runes on us and then there was a huge poof of fire and smoke and two giant lizardmen appeared. I think one of them was a lizardwoman.
I was, to say the least, nervous.
They shouted a lot and the lizardmen all bowed down before them; then they untied us and hoisted us over their shoulders. Cadence slept through this, but I tried and failed to break free and then POOF, we were back in Canterlot. ...
And the two giant lizardmen put us down, then poof, turned into Ivan and Princess Luna. ...
"Okay, the easy rescue is over," Ivan said, then shook Cadence gently.
She woke up, rubbing her eyes. "I feel woozy."
"You'll be okay once you rest and your blood all goes the right way," Princess Luna said and then sighed, settling down on a couch.
We were in some parlor, decorated with scenes of ducks on water and seaponies. There was a table with tea and cookies and lots of couches to lounge around on. Rarity would... let's not think about Rarity.
Sigh.
I managed to go this whole mission without thinking about her too.
Celestia now entered. "The Council of Intrusions has confirmed two breaches at the place you teleported from." She and Luna now stared at each silently a short time, then Celestia said, "The Council says that can't be the true Key, which should be sealed in a vault which could only be opened by five Hierarchs, one from each Sphere."
"Anything can be stolen by a good enough thief," Ivan said. "We have to assume it's the real thing."
"You somehow... how did you know to have a duplicate key that exploded?" I asked Princess Luna.
"I had some anti-entropy bombs; I reshaped one of them with Stone Shape quickly and swapped it for the real one, leaving it invisible in the invisible ink," Princess Luna said proudly. "I am going to call Twilight. Cadence, do you feel up to more danger?"
"I think I have to rest some, I am worn out," Cadence confessed, staring at the floor. "I'm sorry, Princess."
"And Rainbow Dash, then," Princess Luna said. "Probably this should be easy. I just hope Pinkie is okay, wherever she is."
****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
"But if it is called Grimtooth's Deadly Dungeon of Death, why does anyone come to it?" I asked Grak.
"Principle four is that if you put the words 'Nothing but unavoidable death beyond this door' on a door, Adventurers will find a way to open it," Grak said, shrugging as we loped along down a tunnel. "Everyone forced the 'Inescapable Death Dungeon of Mascus the Adventurer Eater' to shut down because it was stealing too much business from everyone else. It was just a door and a slide that dropped you into his inexhaustible all-devouring maw. Also, he never spent his gold, so he was draining the economy."
After a few seconds thinking about that, I decided to never think about it again. "So the heart of the economy of your world is that you lure adventurers into dungeons, take all their treasure, then use it for your living expenses and to buy things to make better dungeons?"
"It's the heart of the Troll economy, anyway," Grak said, now opening a door and leading me into a *huge* cave; there was a large lake, lots of stalagmites and stalactites, fungus growing on the walls and dozens of glowing crystals in the ceiling which dimly illuminated the room; we skirted the lake, heading for a platform with a half-dozen big chairs on it with attached fishing rods.
"Adventurers come for treasure, die, and then we use their money to buy food, magical items, gems, things to help us build more, better, and bigger dungeons, and so on. The money we spend in the towns keeps the human, elven, and dwarven economy going so they can send more adventurers. The circle of economic life," Grank told me.
I reached the fishing pole chairs. "So he wants me to test this?"
"Yes. This part of the dungeon isn't open to visitors yet as the traps need further testing," Grak said.
"Do you get a lot of Pony adventurers?" I asked him, hopping up into a chair and working the fishing rod with my hooves; it was clumsy as this really was designed for hands, but I made it work and soon was waiting for a bite.
He now stepped to the very edge of the platform. "Not really. Most people wouldn't turn into a horse with a Metamorph Me spell. At least not for a dungeon."
I tried to parse that. "Wait... you think I'm polymorphed?" I asked him as I waited for a bite.
"What's a polymorph?" he asked curiously. "A shapeshifting polygamist?" ...
I had a bite! It began to tug. "Okay, let me reel it in," I said; the chair began to wobble but I held on tight as Grak watched, frowning. Then I pulled the trout out of the water. "Not bad. I'm vegetarian, but you eat meat, right?"
Grak took the trout, but he gave it the stinkeye as if it had been a very naughty trout. Then he swallowed it in one gulp and began spitting out the bones, into the water.
I don't know if Fluttershy would like that, but I don't know ecology well.
So I pulled a half-dozen fish out of the water. "This is a lot of fun," I told him. "I'm not taking too many fish, am I?"
"Get up," Grak said, so I did; he undid part of the platform and got inside it and began monkeying around.
While he did this, I ambled around, splashed in the edge of the water some and sang a little song about Seaponies.
"Okay, try it again," Grak said, getting over to the edge of the platform.
I wonder what went wrong. It seemed fine to me.
I got in the chair, cast my reel and waited. Soon I had something *big*. I could see a huge thing... is that a small whale? I pulled and pulled and then... the twine or whatever it is broke.
Grak went and opened a secret door in the wall to a supply closet; he now restrung the reel and I tried again. The huge fish got it and now the chair began to rattle. Grak licked his teeth nervously and the whale or whatever it is tugged and I tugged and...
Suddenly, the whale or whale-like fish, flew up into the air as suddenly the chair rotated backwards, smashing through the platform and then spun through the undercarriage, full of complicated machinery; I heard Grak scream and then I heard the sound of a whale falling on a troll.
It's very specific but hard to describe. Imagine if you dropped a stone golem from the roof of Celestia's castle onto a giant mushroom, maybe.
The chair I was in tried to rotate back into place but it bounced off the whale and now I was stuck under the platform; what does all this machinery do, anyway?
I began studying it; it looks like it's set up to fire springs which launch the chair into the air when the chair gets tugged, pulling a pin out of place. That sounds pretty fun. Then you swim back and have to reset it.
There's some flaws with the design, though. I began trying to fix them while I was stuck here.
I was still trying to fix it when I heard the sound of someone beating up a whale or whatever that thing is. Fluttershy would know. I wish she was here.
Well, not *right* here as she'd get filthy and there's not room for two ponies under here.
"I don't know where the talking pony went," Grak said.
"I'm under here! I can't get out," I shouted.
The troll crew pulled me out, and one of them said, "This trap really relies on adventurers being suckers too much."
"I don't think you CAN underestimate their intelligence," a second said.
"I think I figured out how to fix this," I said, then showed them and they stared at me, but then re-fitted all the equipment the right way. Then I hopped up in the chair and began fishing.
This time a giant shark bit onto my reel and the whole thing worked perfectly to fling me into the air after it; I shouted, "Yahooooooooooo!!!!!" as I went flying over the lake and then came down on the giant shark's head, knocking it out.
I swam back to shore. "I think you're going to have to pay the shark more," I told them.
They looked at each other, then Grak said, "How much damage can you survive?"
"All the damage I've ever taken!", I said proudly. "What doesn't kill me usually ends up as my friend!" Or runs away. Some people are hard to be friends with, unfortunately.
The trolls huddled, then one of them said, "I am Baragashkakkorashmishharkekekekoring, but you can call me Barag. Come with us, maybe you can figure out what's wrong with another one of our prototypes."
"Sure!" I said. Man, Applebloom won't be happy she missed this.
*******************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
Twilight and I carefully drew the runes into the magic circle; shifting to a parallel plane *deliberately* is harder than teleportation and it's best to prepare an anchor point. Either of us can easily teleport back to it.
Spike walked around nervously, while Ivan sat in a chair, reading a book he'd gotten from the library while we were making preparations. 'Thircanius' Guide to Magical Weapons, Volume Five'. Hmm, must be... well, anything published in the last 1000 years is usually new to me.
Rainbow Dash was plopped down on the floor next to him, also reading, 'Bio-Research in Blackmoor: A History'. Her face was all scrunched up, and her Element was glowing; I had gotten hers and Twilight's Elements out of the vaults, along with Pinkie's.
Part of me worried that I should get the entire team, but I don't want to take them all into another prime plane in case something goes wrong. As Immortals go, my planar travelling experience is fairly low. I mainly travelled with others during my period as a novice... which I then ended messily.
We then began another circle for the second trace; we don't know who went where; I am hoping one of the traces leads to two of them so we don't lose one of them forever.
Though it could mean one of them is back on the Adri Varna. I hope not.
"Man, this is crazy. Green Slime was originally invented as a lubricant but it killed the people who made it and got spores into the air and now it's found all over the world," Rainbow Dash said, shaking her head.
"Man, we lost two people to that stuff in the Money Pit," Ivan said, shaking his head. "Which, by the way, turned out to have wooden coins at the bottom. Old Elven currency, now worthless due to being waterlogged." He slumped in his chair. "By the time we got everyone raised, we lost money on the whole thing."
We now finished the circles. "Dash, pick a circle," I said.
Dash began to circle it them, studying them. "I'm picking the first one we try?"
"Yes," Twilight said, then looked to me for confirmation. I nodded and she continued, "Rescuing people is about loyalty, so you should choose."
"Hmmm..." Her element glowed softly but Rainbow Dash looked uncertain. "They both reso-thing with loyalty."
"Resonate?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah." Dash's eyes went to half-mast and she hovered over each circle, then frowned. "I think this one is more dangerous... maybe." She pointed to the one on the left.
Twilight paused and now she concentrated, horn glowing and the glow mixed with Dash's glow. "This one has a faster flow of time than our universe or the other circle," Twilight said, pointing to the more dangerous one. "I think we should do it first, as it means more time for those lost there to get in trouble."
We all got into the circle, Ivan riding me, Spike on Twilight, Dash above us and then Twilight and I chanted and the magic blended together and then light erupted around us.
When it cleared, we were all on a large round table covered with dinner plates and dishes of food which we were now trampling and the table promptly collapsed; six of the twelve humans around the table teleported, flipped backwards or in one case, turned into an eagle and evacuated the immediate area. Six others were caught unready and sat in their chairs, in some cases now wearing their food.
Not the best way to meet the locals.
One of the ones caught off guard now said in clumsy Common, "Arr U Eeekwestrian?"
"Yes," I told him. "I am Princess Luna, seeking my guards."
One of the other wizards began shouting about something and now the one I was talking to looked worried. "I am Magister Michael bani Jerbiton. Your guards are here..." He struggled for words, sighed, and cast a spell. "They have gone with some of the grogs and Magister Lucius bani Merinta to negotiate with the dryads for Plant-oriented Tass. They arrived here three months ago and have lived with us ever since."
I winced at that. Three months. My poor guards.
Well, if time is faster here, we can wait a little while for their return.
One of the humans with slicked back black hair, wearing a black shirt with red flames under a green tunic, got up in our face, shouting and waving and pointing; he was covered with dinner.
"That is Magister Francois bani Tytalus. He is trying to challenge you to Certamen, a dueling contest, because you covered him in food and he feels insulted," Michael bani Jerbiton said, sighing. "You are not obliged to accept, but some here will think less of you if you refuse."
"I'll duel him right through the wall," Rainbow Dash said excitedly. "I... oh man, I have food on me!"
It was only at this point I realized we were food-splattered too.
"I can duel him," Twilight said. "Non-lethal, I presume."
"Yes, it was invented by our founder to ensure wizards stopped killing each other in duels," Michael bani Jerbiton said.
I could see younger wizards now cleaning up the mess with magic, which included cleaning us up. Apprentices, I assume.
"If you don't mind, Twilight," I said to her.
"It shouldn't take a duel," Twilight said, sighing. "But we don't want an incident, either. So how do we do this?"
It was soon time to go to the arena.
*******************
Twilight's Duelling Journal:
I've never fought an actual formal, proper duel before, so I thought I should start a dueling journal to record such experiences. Fortunately, I had two blank journals with me!
This world is called 'Dirt'. I wonder if that's an error in the magical translation; surely they have a prettier name for their world. This country is called 'France' and bears some resemblance to our province of 'Prance' and to 'New Averoigne', which... wait, could this be the world the New Averoigneans came from?
I quickly noted that in my geography journal for later study. .
So, the dueling arena is on the roof, under a huge glass dome; the stars shone down on us as we each entered through a door and passed into the central circle; four human wizards moved to equidistant positions around it and cast a spell which shrouded the inner ring with a field of light blue force. Observers could still watch, but this would block the magic.
As I understand it, Certamen can't actually kill anyone, though your foe will *appear* dead at the end. All your magic becomes illusions you experience as real.
Magister Francois bani Tytalus burst into flames at the start, so I triggered a rain of snow on him, snuffing it; he threw a fireball and I teleported out of the way; he stared at *that*, eyes wide, leaving himself vulnerable to me making his mane grow so it covered his eyes; he pushed that aside in time to get hit with lightning and go flying.
I waited to see if he was down and he chanted and the ground under me ignited in flames; OWW. I teleported but now I was somewhat scorched and he reshaped the fire into a tumbling ball.
He chased me around with it as I couldn't stay still long enough to cast. So I teleported behind him and flung him into his own flames; this disoriented him but he was immune to his own fire.
I should have anticipated that!
I created a lariat of lightning and tried to lasso him, but he dodged and cast this water spell where the lightning discharged down it into the floor and into my hooves as I ended up standing on the water. *Nice*, though I didn't enjoy it and went stumbling backwards.
I heard a noise; Dash was shouting something and trying to break into the arena and Luna was arguing with her.
"I have this, Dash!" I shouted, though now I was dodging three falcons made of lightning, while the magister prepared a *big* spell.
Unfortunately for him, when he unleashed a great rolling sheet of fire at me, I teleported to the other side of it, then... and then the fire hit the water and the whole place filled with steam and we couldn't see each other.
Further, the electrical falcons now turned into a lightning storm that zapped us both. I fell into what was left of the water, then gathered it off me into a whip of water and lashed out with it; this showed me where he was when he yelped and then I *froze* him.
He stumbled out of the mists, slowed by the ice and now I turned up the cold. He babbled, tried to cast another spell, got wobbly and fell over.
The Certamen field collapsed and the duel was over.
"And the winner is Duchess Sparkle," Magister Michael bani Jerbiton announced. "This affair of honor is settled."
"Are you okay?" Dash asked me, eyes wide.
"I'm fine," I told her. "It was perfectly safe."
Now she grinned. "I knew you'd kick his ass," she said, miming a back kick.
After that, we had no trouble while we waited for the guard ponies to return. I just hope this doesn't keep us from getting to Pinkie in time.
*****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
"Okay, pull the lever," Barag said from down the hallway.
The lever was set into the wall of this dead end corridor in the dead end. It was labelled 'Treasure Vault Release'. So I pulled it; I like to be helpful.
Immediately, I dropped down into a deep pit, though I landed on my feet and then... part of the ceiling opened and gold began to rain down into the pit. But only one side. Eventually, the pit filled up partway, enough for me to clamber back out. "Well, getting the treasure out of the pit is going to be a lot of work."
"Dammit, it still doesn't fill the pit," Barag said, scraping the wall with his claws. He came and looked down. "The math indicates the vault should fill it and drown the person who falls in with gold."
I studied the vault through the hole. "That vault is *much* smaller than the hole. Can I see the plans?"
He showed me the scroll and I studied it. "See here? ' means foot and " means yards, right?"
"Yeah," he said. "Standard notation."
"And the pit is measured in yards and the vault in *feet*, so it's one-twentyseventh the size of the pit! Someone left out the second '," I told him.
"Dammit, Gorrshkarakator," Barag said angrily. "No wonder those two captured adventurers were happy to stumble into this trap. Someone's going to take a fall."
"I already did," I said.
He looked at me, then laughed a grim laugh. "So you're an engineering pony?"
"I'm mostly a bard and cook, but I've learned lots of things," I told him. "You might consider filling the expanded vault with coin-shaped hard cheeses; it's going to take most of your wealth to fill this thing with gold coins once it's the right size."
"Wouldn't it go bad?" he asked.
"Cheese was invented to use up milk before it went bad. Cure it properly and it'll last long enough to do its' job."
"Here, come with me, let's see what you think of the treadmill staircase," Barag said.
Another troll with us said, "Given it's busted, it's more like a normal staircase."
"Oooh, I like staircases."
******************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
Having recovered my guards, it was time to go rescue Pinkie, so I cast the spell to home in on her and we all landed on a bed which attempted to rise and crush us against the ceiling. Dash and I battered it to bits, but there was no sign of Pinkie. I soon, however, had a lock on her. Teleports were blocked, so we would have to go the hard way through what soon turned out to be a dungeon.
Hold on, Pinkie, we're coming!
*****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
I was in my nice new office, working on a new trap; since I can't get home on my own, I had to get a job to support myself, but thankfully, the Trolls are equal-opportunity employers, at least if you're smart and don't die easily. I even got this cool earring that lets me call the other employees or the boss remotely! It's like having Unicorn telepathy magic! I love it, but we all spend like half our work time chatting instead of working, which is probably why Grimtooth is so cranky all the time.
Currently, I am trying to upgrade Murderbed 3.3, which basically isn't very good at all; it has failed to kill me or even injure me successfully each time I've slept on it.
The problem is that fast movement wakes me up so I jump off it and slow motion just pushes me gently against the ceiling until I get bored of it.
Maybe it should shackle you in your sleep? But how will it tell where the appropriate limbs are? And human shackles work poorly on ponies...
Grak stuck his head in through the door. "Hey, do you have time to come check out the new iteration of the electro-water cannon?"
I spat out my quill pen onto the diagram on my desk. "I'm always ready to drink from the fire hose," I said, getting up.
"GIVE ME THE KEY," Sombra said.
I looked around; no sign of Sombra. "Did you hear that?" I asked.
Grak sniffed the air. For some reason. "I heard a voice but I can't smell anyone." OH.
I sniffed the air; the usual weird metallic tangs and hints of spices and leather. "Maybe we imagined it."
"GIVE ME THE KEY, OR I WILL DESTROY YOU," Sombra said.
"I can't give you the key if you don't *show yourself*," I said.
After a *long* pause, he appeared, standing on my desk, where his evil corrupted my elaborate diagram into some sort of curled up bits of shadow! "Hey, I put a lot of work into that," I told him angrily. "Also, you took your key and blew up!"
"IT WAS A FAKE! GIVE ME THE KEY OR DIE!" he shouted.
Grak turned. "We've got an intruder!" he shouted down the hallway and then got lighting bolted by Sombra; Grak fell down, twitching.
I bolted down the hallway. "INTRUDER ALERT!" I shouted. "It's an evil Shadow Pony who wants something he blew up himself because he's not too bright!" That was probably too mean but I'm angry.
I don't like me when I'm angry.
This is just like when Inky ate all the cakes and blamed me for it.
Admittedly, I had planned to eat them all but she struck first.
I dodged lightning but the trolls who rushed into the hallway were less lucky. I left many twitching trolls lying on the floor.
"Pinkamena D. Scholar," Grimtooth said to me via my magic earring. "Lure him into the Solar Flare trap."
Oooh, Light against Shadow. "I'm on it, boss."
I ran through a series of hallways, down a staircase, then leaped over a small chasm and up another staircase, through a series of dart traps which still need to be reset, and finally into the Chamber of the Solar Flare, leading him RIGHT in front of the huge sun painted on the wall.
WHOOSH, a huge jet of flame rushed over him and only then did I suddenly realize that might, in fact, kill him. I felt horrified for about three seconds, then saw that the flame had turned black and now he was somehow bending it into a lasso with his mind and snaring me with it.
Also, he was flying without wings AND was unhurt.
"Boss, he just turned the solar flare into evil fire or something and I'm caught," I told Grimtooth.
"Dammit, keep him talking about his evil plans or whatever idiocy he came here for and I'll round up a posse," my boss said. "Dammit that trap has a four skull rating, but every time you REALLY count on it, it fails."
"It would be five skulls if it *never* failed," I reminded the boss.
"I know," he said and now I could faintly hear him shouting at other trolls.
"GIVE ME THE KEY!" he shouted.
"I can't get in my saddlebags while I am tied up!" I protested after some effort.
There was a long pause. The Solar Flare trap went off again and he just made a... is that an evil Solstice Tree of evil fire?
It even has little presents on it. I mean ornaments. No presents.
I checked.
He untied me, but kept one leg bound so I could not flee. I dug and threw him my house key. "The Cakes are going to be really mad at me for giving you this but I have no choice."
He didn't even *titter*.
"THE KEY TO THE PIT OF BANISHMENT!" he shouted.
"You stole it! It blew up!" I protested.
He flipped me upside down and my saddlebags poured out on the ground. Various food items and cooking utensils, including all eight jars of pickles... which I had forgotten I had! Dammit, I could have shown Grak my pickle cigar gag! I tried to grab a jar but I couldn't reach.
Two romances, an adventure novel and the book Twilight wants me to read but which I can't figure out all fell out next, followed by the Glasses of Groucho, my malfunctioning time travel snow globe, both rubber ducks, my Glasses of Disguise, my rubber goose and... no rubber chicken? Dang it!
Gummy fell out, utterly bloated, along with the remains of the alligator treats; I think he ate them all. The Blackmoorian Can of Preservation was in his mouth but he was too full to bite down. And next to him was the invisible ink bottle.
"YES!" Sombra said and took my invisible ink bottle.
"Uh, that's not a key, you know," I said. I mean, we did try to use it to make the key invisible but...
When he shattered the bottle, the ink fell off it, rendering that key to the pit thing visibile.
Wait... I had it the whole time? Did I do a switcheroo and *forget*?
"Yes, now I will..."
"SUFFER LIKE NO ONE HAS EVER SUFFERED!" an angry female voice boomed; the 'Solstice Tree of Evil Fire' now suddenly exploded into a huge alicorn made out of evil black and red fire with eyes of ruby with black and red fire inside them.
The Solar Flare trap went off and she wrapped Sombra in chains of black fire and when he tried to squeeze out, she filled the gaps with black ice full of black lighting; my entire coat stood on end and my mane and tail frizzed; I hopped back; he'd lost his grip on me, and I began scooping up everything into my saddlebags, starting with Gummy.
"YOU CANNOT TOUCH ME!" Sombra bellowed. "I AM THE CHOSEN OF THANATOS, THE HIERARCH OF YOUR SPHERE!"
For a moment, I thought whoever this is was going to just explode. Is it Cunning Thought? It sounds kind of like her if she stood in an echo chamber.
Now alarms began going off. "WARNING! LEVEL FIVE DIVINE POWER IN USE. EVACUATE TO SAFETY ZONES."
I sped up gathering my stuff. Thanatos... he's the head of the Sphere of Entropy. Cunning Thought's boss. Could slap even Celestia around. "Ummm... can you use that much divine power on this plane without getting in trouble?"
"I DO NOT CARE. AND WITH THIS..." the key flew over to Cunning Thought. "I CAN ENSURE THIS FOOL SPENDS THE NEXT AGE LOCKED UP, POSSIBLY FOREVER."
Princess Luna now burst in with Ivan riding her, along with Twilight, ridden by Spike, and Dash, ridden by no one. I hope she didn't get turned down. "Mother! You need to reduce your power expenditure before the Council of Intrusion decides you're in violation of the rules and locks *you* up."
"If I stand down, this little shit will escape," she hissed. So it *is* Cunning Thought.
Spike looked vaguely hypnotized by all the fire, while Ivan said, "Cunning Thought, you are standing in front of a fire trap!"
WHOOSH, she shaped it into another layer of prison for Sombra, who continued to pontificate. But now you couldn't hear him. "I like fire," she said, but she did seem a little calmer. "And this little shit and his master betrayed you so he got off scott free and you spent a thousand years in prison!" Cunning Thought said, still angry but not in total echoing bellow mode.
"Mother, we can contain him together, but you have to stand down; I can feel a probe starting! They'll be here soon! And neither of us can count on them being reasonable about this," Princess Luna said, sounding frustrated. "Please, won't you trust me to be strong enough for this?"
For a moment, Cunning Thought was utterly silent; I could faintly hear something about 'crystals' and 'whores' from inside the prison. Or maybe 'holes'.
I could see Ivan disarming the Solar Flare trap. I licked my lips. "How about if we all have some cookies? Or pickles! Or pickles AND cookies, which I have never tried." How have I never tried that? Maybe I could even make *pickle cookies*.
I fought the urge to figure out how to do that.
Spike looked at Cunning Thought, then at Sombra. "So... what exactly did he do to piss you off so much?"
"I know Thantos voted with the rest of the Council of Intrusion to lock up Princess Luna after her rebellion for abuse of Immortal Power on the Prime," Twilight said softly. "Whereas I assume he hid Sombra or something, where no one could find him."
"I think the crown malfunctioned and flung him through time or hid him outside it for a time or something, until we set him free," Princess Luna said softly.
"THANATOS CAST THE DECIDING VOTE TO SEND LUNA TO PRISON WHILE HIDING HIS PROTÉGÉ FROM PUNISHMENT," Cunning Thought shouted, now very angry again.
"I'm sure the three of us can contain him," Twilight said, stepping up. "Celestia and I would not like to see you imprisoned for breaking the rules. And neither would Luna. Can't you trust us?"
I suddenly realized that Dash had vanished... can she turn invisible now?
"I SHOULD JUST SNUFF OUT HIS MISERABLE LIFE AND THEN I WON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THANATOS FINDING A WAY TO GET HIM OUT OF BEING PUNISHED," Cunning Thought said, now weaving a net of acid around the prison as it floated in the air.
"If you kill him, Thanatos will stop at nothing to make you pay for it, you know that!" Princess Luna pled with her. "Mother we don't have much time and you know it!"
"I FINALLY UNDERSTAND WHY THOR JUST BLUNDERS AROUND SMASHING THINGS!" Cunning Thought shouted. "I AM GOING TO SMASH THIS LITTLE SHIT!"
This isn't like her; she's all subtle and kind of funny and... I had no choice. I scattered pickles on the floor, then tripped on them, making them roll under my hooves until I collided with Twilight, sending Spike into the air to somehow go headfirst into one of Cunning Thought's saddlebags; thankfully, he is fireproof.
"Ooops, I'm so clumsy," I said, laughing weakly.
Cunning Thought stared at me like I was insane.
"Trap disarmed," Ivan said, then turned to warily face Cunning Thought.
Twilight laughed, then covered her mouth with one hoof. "Sorry, Pinky," she said weakly.
Princess Luna looked at me, rushed over, and... slipped on the pickles, sliding across the room howling; Ivan rushed after her and now HE slid on them, crashing into her as she crashed into the wall and I rolled around laughing.
When Princess Luna tried to rise, slipped and she and Ivan tumbled more, Cunning Thought began to laugh. At first hoarsely, then with an easier voice and as she laughed, her fires died away until she was just a red-coated mare... an Alicorn mare, but not a thing of terror and flame and... I could have cooked something off her flame! I missed a gag!
I guess it would have made evil shadow food, though.
"Luna," Cunning Thought said, sounding now like a fond mother, now helping Princess Luna up... or she thought as now *she* slipped and fell onto Ivan and Princess Luna. This sent Sombra flying and the prison began dissolving and Twilight quickly trapped him in a bubble of purple light but he began thrashing and the bubble bent in unnatural ways.
Luna and Cunning Thought began to rise, trying to cast spells, but slipped again, tumbling in a kind of ball, right into Twilight and now her bubble popped and Sombra was free.
*Where is Dash?*
I began feeling this weird breeze; something was wrong with it. Sombra began to cackle, seizing the key, which apparently laid on the floor all this time. "VICTORY WILL BE MINE!"
"I HATE THIS PLACE!" Dash shouted, looking charred, covered in burnt paper, tangled in fishing lines and wires and having some sort of rock monster chewing on her right leg; then she hit Sombra; SONIC RAINBOOM.
The key went flying and Gummy stuck his head out of my saddlebag and ate it. ...
Then he sank back out of sight.
Gummy, if you throw up inside my saddlebag, I won't be happy!
It was only funny the first ten times.
"I paid my protection money to the gods! Please take your divine brawl OUT of my dungeon!" I heard Grimtooth shouting.
"Agreed," a man's voice said and suddenly, we all turned bright yellow and vanished.
***********************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
We found ourselves before the council of Intrusion. Ixion for the Sphere of Energy. Terra, Mother Nature, for the Sphere of Matter. Noumena for the Sphere of Thought. Khoronous, Father Time, for the Sphere of Time. And Nyx for the Sphere of Entropy. However, Thanatos was here as well, skeletal as always. He is the ruler of the Sphere of Entropy, and thus the boss of Mother and Nyx. He had Sombra tucked under one arm, since he was twenty feet tall today.
Mother and I and Ivan were still tangled on the floor, with Twilight near us and Pinkie a bit further away. I'm not sure *where* Spike went.
"You look lovely as always, Hierarch," Nyx said to Thanatos in a sultry way. Perhaps *only* Nyx could do that to Thanatos.
I am standing before...
I am lying on the ground, tangled up with Mother and Twilight, all of us now coated in pickle juice. It was necessary but this is going to weaken our position. Dash hovered above us, laughing her head off.
Spike now stuck his head out of Mother's saddlebag. "You know there's a fire elemental in here, right? Or something like it."
Mother Nature blinked at Spike, while Ixion now studied him.
"Yes, it's one of my little darlings I spawned with Rathanos. The children all burned their way out of their creche and I was rounding them up," Mother said cheerfully as if she had not been close to murder before.
"What exactly is going on?" Ixion demanded.
"Sombra had this evil key and somehow it ended up in my saddlebags and Gummy ate it," Pinkie told them. "Hmm, I guess I won't get any severance pay from my new job."
Ixion clearly felt *less* enlightened than before.
"This little shit finally came out of his hidey-hole and my darling daughter and her friends caught him. I expect he'll be getting to find out what a thousand years in prison feels like, maybe more, given he stole the Key of the Pit of Banishment," Mother said, her voice starting to heat up but she cooled it down. "Which apparently is going to need better security."
Ixion rumbled deep in his throat, while Father Time said, "I am not sure if there *is* better security possible. If this is the real key... something ate it?" He turned to Pinkie.
"Gummy, my pet alligator." She pulled him out and began shaking him; he did not seem to care, just wobbling about.
Mother Nature gestured and Gummy now spat up the key; Ixion made a face at it and Father Time gestured and it became instantly clean and landed in his hands. "It is the Key," he said, frowning deeply. "But its history has been erased; everything before the moment Sombra confronted you all... in whatever that was... is gone."
Pinkie now cuddled Gummy as best she could.
"Do you mean from the moment we met him in the ruins of the Crystal Empire, sir? Or when we encountered him on the parallel prime?" Ivan asked.
"The ruins," Father Time said. "As for Sombra... well, he was not an immortal and thus his effort to overthrow the Crystal Empire is not the business of the Immortals to punish. Mortals have the right to rule themselves or overthrow each other. However, theft of the Key of Banishment most certainly is. Especially by a candidate for Immortality. Now a failed candidate. He has to be interrogated to find out who helped him as there is no way he stole it himself."
"THE VAULT MUST BE UNSEALED," Thanatos said, as if he needs to show off among the Immortals. "THAT WILL REQUIRE US TO GET ODIN."
"Odin has gone off on some quest for wisdom and is not responding to efforts to contact him," Noumena said, frowning as he sat in this weird pose he always does when he is in a chair. I think it's a meditation technique. "Until he returns, we cannot check."
Mother now made a rumbling noise in her throat. "Assuming he has not gotten himself imprisoned by one of the Outer Beings again."
"He was not Hierarch, then," Noumena said, eyes narrowing. He made a dismissive gesture. "He is absent, not imprisoned."
"I can contain Sombra and arrange interrogation," Mother Nature began.
"*I* will get the truth out of him, for I command the Light of Truth," Ixion said.
I'm not sure if that's anything special or just him bragging.
Nyx made her usual bedroom eyes at him. "I would love to help you, Ixion. I'm quite good at getting people to... tell me secrets."
Ixion's eyes crossed.
I can't tell if she's sincere or just likes to mess with his head.
Mother grumbled, then said, "The Sphere of Thought is probably best suited to get the truth out of him, as his mind remains mortal and hopelessly stupid."
Sombra seethed, clearly not stupid enough to start anything but understandably not wanting to be insulted. He should be glad we stopped Mother from doing horrible things to him.
I would be angrier with him, but seeing Mother so angry... Mother does not get angry like that. Or if she does, it's to manipulate you. But I think she really was angry on my behalf.
If Pinkie hadn't had those pickles... but that's Pinkie. A force of chaos, but one whose chaos tends to good. Which is why she commands laughter, which forces the mighty to think again at what they are doing.
"HE WAS MY STUDENT, I WILL OVERSEE ANY INTERROGATION," Thanatos said.
This is going to go on forever, I can tell.
"Should we be here?" Twilight asked nervously.
"No," Ixion said. "Thank you for assisting Luna, but this is a matter for the Immortals to settle now. Luna, can you return them to the Prime?"
"Of course," I said. "Thank you, everyone, for coming with me to recover everyone."
"Of course I came," Rainbow Dash said. "I always stand up for my friends."
"Oh, before you go... everyone, this is my daughter's coltfriend, Ivan; he is a candidate for immortality under Asterius," Mother said, scooting over and bumping Ivan over next to me. "They refuse to say how soon I will have grandchildren, however."
Ivan and I both turned red. Well, I tried, but you can't tell if I blush because of my black coat. "We're not... We haven't..." He began to flail his hands and I tried to get my composure back.
"While it is not forbidden, dating mortals only ends in tragedy," Ixion said, shaking his head and frowning at us.
"I think it's very romantic," Nyx said, smiling at us. "I approve. If his quest fails, I can turn him into a vampire for you, Luna dear, and then he can be with you forever anyway."
Of course Nyx thinks that is a good idea.
"THIS SORT OF PATHETIC BEHAVIOR IS WHAT GOT YOU IMPRISONED FOR A THOUSAND YEARS," Thanatos pronounced. "ESPECIALLY WITH SOMEONE AS SELF-DESTRUCTIVE AS THIS FOOL."
"Love isn't pathetic!" Pinkie protested. "Well, sometimes, but not *this* time."
"I am not self-destructive!" Ivan shouted angrily at Thanatos.
"Do not shout at the Hierarch of Entropy," Twilight urgently whispered to Ivan, having somehow suddenly gotten right next to him.
Pinkie stepped between them, rising bipedal, a forehoof thrust towards each of them. "Let's not fight! We're all friends here, right?"
"FRIENDSHIP IS ONE OF THE MOST INSIDIOUS OF LIES," Thanatos said.
"It is not! Friendship is awesome!" Rainbow Dash said angrily; he ignored her.
"Yes, but that makes it useful," Mother said to Thanatos. Mother, you never change. Unless it would confuse me.
"I AM UNINTERESTED IN YOUR PRATTLE," he said to Mother; for a moment, her eyes flared and then she just grinned at him.
"Sadly, Rathanos will never make an honest woman of me," Mother said mournfully, turning to Ivan. "Don't be like Rathanos, Ivan."
Ivan stared at her. "What?"
"Enough," Noumena said. "Loki, you have once again shown your ability to turn anything into a mockery. We have business to discuss. Luna, please send the mortals home." He slumped in his chair, frowned, then assumed his meditative pose again.
"YOUR VENGEANCE WILL FAIL, YOU KNOW, IVAN. THEY ARE BEYOND YOUR POWER, EVEN IF YOU BECOME IMMORTAL. I WILL ENJOY WATCHING YOU DIE TRYING, HOWEVER," Thanatos said.
"Thanatos, that is *enough*," Ixion said. He turned to me. 'Please send them now before Thanatos or Loki rob us of any more dignity.'
I nodded. "I will see you soon, my friends." And I teleported them home.
*****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
Twilight showed us a chart full of circles and lines and glowing stars. "See, this is the world of 'Dirt', where I fought the duel, and this is Trollworld, where Pinkie landed," she said, tapping two circles. "This is Thieves' World, where everyone is some kind of thief."
"How does anything get made if everyone steals everything?" Dash asked.
"I don't know, but it's ninth of my list of parallel primes I would like to study one day," Twilight said. "How are you doing, Spike?" she asked him worriedly.
"I'm fine," he said and came over and hugged her. "I enjoy working with Cadence, but I miss you."
"I miss you too, Spike," she said, snuggling him and I smiled.
We were in the Canterlot library, where Luna sent us. Ivan was sitting in a chair, grimacing at a bookshelf as if to set it on fire with his mind. I came over and put a hoof on his shoulder, balancing on my hind-legs and leaning on the chair some for stability. "Thanatos just likes to tear people's hearts out. You shouldn't listen to him," I told Ivan. "He's just a meanie."
Ivan made this weird noise. Is he broken?
"Pinkie is right, he is a terrible being," Twilight said, letting go of Spike and coming over. "It's going to be okay, Ivan."
"You wanna be alone a while, man?" Spike asked him. "Sometimes a man has to go off and think."
"I think so," Ivan said. "Luna will know where to find me. Thank you, everyone." He was unusually quiet. Then he stepped into the shadows and vanished.
I hope he's okay; brooding is really the most fun with an audience. "I am starving. Can we get some food?"
"Sure. Can you tell us about what you saw in Trollworld while we eat?" Twilight asked excitedly.
"Of course I can," I told her and began telling her the whole saga as we headed to get FOOD.
***************
Ivan's Brooding on the Roof:
I was tucked away between two towers where I could easily balance, looking up at the stars, when a bat flew up to me. It spat up a letter and flew off. It was from Nyx, offering to make me a vampire right now so I could be a vampire Immortal and thus *doubly* immortal and harder to kill just in case something went wrong. I had no way to send her a reply. Luna will know something.
Luna... I'm drawn to her but we're both wary due to the *many* issues. Marcus can just bonk anything at all, but while turning into a pony is fun...
I do not want to think about this. We're fine, as we are, even if she... she can be so...
Damn me.
Helga would just go for it; she's a born romantic. Marcus would go for it because he was born to bonk anything female. I'm surprised he ran away from Twilight. But I grew up where love and romance were a lot less common than either unhappy marriages or things more like a friendship where you have sex sometimes and work together to survive.
She just understands me like none of my past girlfriends could.
I hope they lock up Sombra for *ten thousand* years.
"Hey, you want company?" Soarin' asked and I nearly fell off the roof; he'd somehow snuck up on me and now was hovering off to my right.
"Hey, Dash is here if you want to see her," I told him. "I'm just feeling frustrated at being a little man in a big universe."
"She told me I should see if you wanted to man-talk, since Marcus isn't here," he told me, landing lightly on the roof by me and settling down into that... I don't know what to call it. Sphinx-like, I guess.
"How are things with you two?" I asked.
"We get mobbed by people who want my time when we try to go out, otherwise good," he said, sighing.
"Maybe you could have Twilight disguise you or fly to Darokin where no one will care," I mused.
"Hmm, yeah," he said. "So how about you?"
"We discovered more about the Crystal Empire, thwarted Sombra's plot and got embarrassed by Cunning Thought. But I fear Thanatos is going to find some way to wiggle Sombra out of this and the fact that he got the... I don't know if I can even talk about it," I said, clenching and unclenching my hands, then rubbing them on my legs. "A bunch of Immortals got told Luna and I are lovers when we're not." I stared up at the sky. "I don't know. I like her, but it's not... it's not as easy as Marcus and Rarity make it look."
"Yeah, I'd imagine. I can't even imagine dating a non-Pony." Soarin' paused. "No offense," he said, not even looking at me.
"None taken," I told him. "I don't want to rush into anything because her mother decided to mouth off."
We drifted into a long talk about past lovers which left me feeling a little better if still generally aggravated with the universe, and especially that shit Thanatos.
***********************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
Sombra is currently in the hands of the Immortals of Thought for interrogation, which is to say, mind-reading. Twilight took her friends home to Ponyville, after I thanked everyone. And I took Cadence to the gardens for a talk; Spike tagged along.
"Valerias reclaimed the Heart and has put it to work elsewhere," I told her. "The Crown broke and Father Time thinks it is skittering into the future, throwing off strange temporal shadows at times; we cannot count on recovering it. If the Crystal Empire rises again, it will require great effort. That may be part of your destiny, but so long as Shadow Ponies rule the Adri Varna, it is not going to be an easy one."
"I think for now I am going to focus on finding those of Crystal Pony ancestry, in whom it might be awakened," Cadence told me. "So did most of its people get hauled across time with the Crown?"
"Some, I think, were corrupted into Shadow Ponies, but yes," I told her. "I will study that hour glass artifact. It may be able to help you."
"Thank you," Cadence said to me. "I guess we had a mixed success."
"I wish I could have done more," Spike confessed.
"You are always a help to everyone who travels with you, Spike," Cadence said, gently tapping his shoulder with a hoof. "You've been a huge help to me."
Spike started to say something, then looked off at the zinnias, which are starting to die as it gets colder. "Your mother was really angry," he said softly.
"I was surprised too," I confessed. "Mother rarely lets her anger show. Especially not to that degree. All her emotions are usually calculated to help her get what she wants." I sighed. Which makes dealing with her hard.
"And she would have been in a lot of trouble if we hadn't stopped her acting on it," he continued.
"Mother was violating rules on using Immortal power on the Primes, yes," I told him. "But also, killing Sombra would have made getting to the truth of what is going on a lot harder and would have brought down Thanatos' enmity on her. Everyone would assume it a revenge killing and Immortals are not supposed to do such things to mortals."
"But that doesn't always stop them," Cadence said softly, studying the daffodils, which also are drooping.
"No, it does not. But because Mother stopped before anyone showed up, it will likely be let go. And Sombra will face justice for the Key. Which will ensure the Pit of Banishment does not give up its contents." For which I am glad.
"And the Carnifex are bound in the Pit," Spike continued. He's getting at something by steps.
"Yes."
"Did he think they would serve him? From what little I know of them, they'd probably see him as dinner," Spike said to me, now looking right at me.
"He could not control the powers he had gained; I think they ruined some of his mind," I told Spike. "He probably believed he could fill them with darkness and control them, conquer the world, blah blah blah." I slumped, wings hitting the ground. "He wasn't always like that. But we both delved into darkness for power and couldn't control it. I don't know how any of the Entropics keep their sanity. But most of them are not out of touch with reality to that degree."
"Would it be possible... I guess I'm too young for any of the Dragon Immortals to have any time for me, though," Spike said, frustrated, idly eating a rock.
"I don't think there is much they could teach you that you would be ready for, yes," I told him. "Is there something you want to know?"
"What I really am. I don't think I'm a normal dragon," he told me.
"You are not," I said and he winced. "But that isn't bad. When you are older, I expect your aunt can help you figure out better how your parents changed you." If not why. But Amethysts do strange things to their offspring. "But I think they wanted you to be able to both be a dragon and able to function in a society. If dragons do not adapt to the rise of humanoids, I fear they will all go into decline and their loss would be a tragedy."
"I think you're meant to be the seed of a better future for dragonkind, Spike," Cadence said kindly to him, patting him again. "Maybe we could visit Dawn Gleaming and Spikey; they serve one of the Dragon Immortals; they might have lore we do not."
"Thanks," Spike said. "You're really nice, Cadence," he said, smiling at her.
"So are you, cute little Spike," she cooed at him.
I hope he does not just end up transferring his crush to her, but I think he's learned a lesson in where anger can take you.
"I'm not little," he protested, but he smiled.
"You are currently scaled well for Pony society," I told him and he smiled at that too.
I should talk to Ivan, but it will be awkward. Damnation, Mother, why do you have to meddle in things like that?
"Hmm, HEY, I can write my own letter and send it to Dawn Gleaming and Spikey can send hers back to me. I'm going to do that right now," Spike said.
He sat down and started writing and I smiled at him for a moment. I envy him for simple problems with simple solutions.
At that moment, my library-working avatar told me that Nyx had dropped by and was asking about fashion designers and she had told Nyx about Rarity.
Urgh. This can't end well. I will send Rarity a warning in a little while.
"I had best go read all the reports I missed," I told them, rising from the grass. "I will see you later. Thank you so much for your help."
"Any time, Princess," Cadence said.
"See ya around, Princess," Spike said, still busy writing.
Good luck, Spike.
*****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
I was busy manning the front desk, bored out of my mind; after my exciting adventure, waiting for customers left me jumpy. Also, I kept worrying about having left my dungeon job in the lurch. I hadn't properly quit and they're probably worrying about me. After all, I got carried off by intruders, never to be seen again!
Hmm, that might be a good internship for Applebloom one day. I should talk to her about it.
Then Cunning Thought walked in the front door, looked around, then said, "Are we alone?"
"Well, I am pretty sure aliens do exist, from the things Twilight has told me," I told her. "But I've only ever met... do Immortals count as aliens? You live on the moon, right?"
For a few seconds, there was silence, but then she smiled. "I meant, here in this building."
"Mr. Cake is in the kitchen, cooking, while Mrs. Cake does battle with getting the children to take their nap. They are a handful," I told her. "But they're very sweet."
"Do you plan to be a mother one day?" she asked me calmly.
"I don't know if I could handle it," I confessed. "I understand my parents better now just from helping with the kids. Were Celestia and Luna a handful?"
"A *giant* handful," Cunning Thought said. "They were born with huge power because I was already an Immortal. I remember Celestia exploding dinner when I tried to teach her to cook and she heated the pot too much. Luna would somehow get high in trees, then was stranded and couldn't get down or explain how she got up there." She laughed loudly at that and so did I. "Anyway, I came to thank you. I owe you a boon."
"For what?" I asked.
"Making me laugh when I had to let go of my rage," she said solemnly. Then she pulled a piece of paper out of her saddlebags with magic and passed it to me. "Write on this and burn it."
I began looking for a match.
"Not right now! When you wish to claim the boon. I will get it and aid you if I can."
I carefully took it; it looked normal except for having Cunning Thought's cutie mark as a watermark. "I only did... I want everyone to laugh. Even Thanatos." I licked my lips a little nervously. "Maybe especially Thanatos."
For a moment, her eyes... they scared me. Then she sighed. "Even Korotiku cannot make Thanatos laugh and he has been trying for millennia. I gave up trying long ago. But if you could make him laugh, you might well become an Immortal yourself on the spot."
"That's possible?" I asked. "I thought you had to do a bunch of complicated quests and stuff."
"For reasons we do not understand, a handful of people have become Immortals by doing something thought impossible or being caught in strange forces," Cunning Thought told me. "You would have to somehow change Thanatos' very nature to make him laugh and if that isn't worthy of immortality, what is?"
Then I know what I have to do. He must be so mean because he's going to explode from all his pent up failure to laugh. I know I get cranky if I can't laugh. "Why do you work for him if he treats you badly?" I asked.
"He is the head of the Sphere of Entropy. I have no choice but to obey, so long as he is the most powerful of us. So long." Cunning Thought smiled a little smile. "But he is ancient, predating the Immortal Storm. It is unlikely any of us could challenge him any time soon, though Nyx is probably the next strongest. She is too easily distracted, however. Still, sooner or later, even the Immortals end or ascend or choose rebirth. We shall see which of those is his fate."
Heavy.
I was trying to think of a way to lighten the mood when Cunning Thought said, "But unless you achieve Immortality, you will likely never see him again. And I must ask for seven buckets of ice cream. One of strawberry ripple, one of swoofberry crunch, and the other five to be whatever flavors the Immortality Crusaders favor. Oh, and an eighth one of your choice, since I want to try something new."
"Oh perfect, you can try my squash-kiwi-surprise flavor!" I said excitedly. The surprise is a toy! "Let me know if you like it. Throwing an ice cream party?"
"For the Crusaders. The first two, I am sending to my daughters," she said.
I began filling the order. "So is Sombra in prison?" I asked.
"More or less, until Odin returns and we can get to the bottom of this. Assuming he's not busy auditioning Valkyries in a vacation plane right now," Cunning Thought said.
"So all's well that ends well." I said.
"Nothing ever ends well permanently, but yes. Thanatos will probably find some way to wiggle Sombra out of this." Rumble. "But we'll see."
I passed her the ice cream. No story can end poorly that ends with an ice cream party, right?
******************
Princess Luna's Secrets:
I was about to dig into the ice cream, even if Mother sent it to me, so it probably will turn me into a duck or something, when Celestia entered my office with another tub of ice cream. "Why don't you call Ivan and I will call Moondancer and we can have a little ice cream party? I think she's feeling irritated you didn't take her on the rescue mission."
Blast it, I didn't even think of that. "Okay," I said. I am more nervous than I should be about seeing Ivan. At least Mother sent ice cream and not herself.
In fact, we ended up with a large ice cream party as more ponies kept showing up and Celestia sent for more ice cream and by the end of it, I hadn't done anything productive for three hours, but I felt better.
Ponies gradually drifted away until only Ivan, Celestia, and I were left. Celestia gently nuzzled me. "You okay?" she asked softly.
"I am," I told her.
"I need sleep but we can talk later, okay?" she said.
"Okay," I told her. She then headed out.
That left Ivan and I and a mess to clean up; he began gathering ice cream buckets, spoons, cups, and so on. I wiped down the room; we have servants for this but...
This is ridiculous. I am an Immortal. I can talk about my feelings without having to evade it.
Finally, Ivan came over to me, stood a few seconds, then said, "We shouldn't rush anything. I like you a lot but we both have a lot to deal with. So let's just take it as it comes, okay? Whatever your Mother decides when she's talking to her Celestia toy."
Exactly what I wanted to say and could not. "Thank you, yes. If all goes well, we will have eternity to work our way forwards, right?"
Now he grinned the grin I like. "Exactly." Then he stared off at nothing and frowned. "How does Thanatos even know what I want?"
"Words gets around; Immortals gossip about each other's students and sometimes even spy on them," I told him. "But I doubt he actually cares enough to meddle. But he tries to bring everyone down, even his fellow Entropics. But he is too potent, too ancient for them to challenge him. Though I think one day, Mother will."
"If he suffered a Stroke, he would decline in power, right?" Ivan said thoughtfully.
"Yes, but his revenge would be terrible," I warned Ivan. A Stroke is a major setback to some large plan of an Immortal, or something which causes havoc for his worshippers. I suffered one when Celestia thwarted my plan to... whatever exactly I thought I was doing. I was a mess at that point.
Ivan sighed. "I know." He looked out the window. "Want to go dancing? I know Helga is having a ball tonight back in Glantri and I hadn't planned to go due to distance, but you can teleport, so..."
I smiled at him. "Sounds great to me." I took on a Belcadizian form and then took his hand and we teleported to Helga's hall. I can do with a little fun before I have to return to my duties.
We'll just take it easy and see how it goes.
I could probably apply that to a lot more of my life. But unlike Celestia, I worry about things.
But tonight, fun.
Sometimes a Princess just needs a little fun.
Pinkie, no doubt, would be proud of me.
Just going forward, one hoof at a time.
*****************
Pinkie's Pie-Tastic Viewpoint:
I looked around in confusion, certain the story was over, and yet it wasn't over. I could see why it was Luna's turn, to close off her story, but wasn't my part done?
Or does this mean I get to go to the ice cream party?
Once I got off duty, I ran up to my room in order to get changed to go to the party or whatever plot twist was next, only to realize, just as I opened the door to my room, that I was naked, so I didn't HAVE to change.
I decided to put on clothing to retroactively justify my intent.
However, I now found Gummy playing with another little alligator... or crocodile... I'm not really sure which he is or how to tell.
Mom lied to me when she told me crocodiles were ALL made out of chocolate. I used to love eating choc-o-crocs at the Spring Festival.
I still do, really.
The other one had blue scales and a funny rune on his forehead and they were busy chasing each other's tail. There was a note but someone had drooled on it, so I couldn't read it at all.
Now Gummy has a playmate. That's an even better way to end a story, right?
Because I don't know what to do if this story isn't over!
Goodnight, Old Ones! May you enjoy your omniscient spying on all of space and time. Man, now it sounds like the next level up from Immortals are just *peepers*.
Ummm...
Please don't take offense! Just a joke, just a joke! Bye!
THE END
Okay, now I'm free to...
You're still here!
*Pinkie vanishes into the distance in a cloud of dust*.
THE REAL END. FOR NOW. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | Short Story Six: Against the Morons | Cunning Thought's Entirely Honest Journal:
Immortals don't need to sleep but I sometimes choose to, partly to confuse people but also because I find it helps me order my thoughts.
So I went to sleep, while manifesting one of my avatars, Bogdozan, in Hule, asleep, in front of a provincial High Priest, Icthar. Mostly I wanted to see what he would do. He made up, on the spot, a sermon about how this means Bogdozan wants us to strike at our sleeping enemies while they are vulnerable. And that we should *not* sleep, not lose vigilance.
I could tell he wanted to rifle through my pockets, but wasn't *that* bold. I like him. I decided to keep an eye on him and crafted a Watching Eye and left it, invisible, to study him and report in after a week.
I most easily scry through fire, but like any Immortal, I can make things to serve my purposes. Since it doesn't do anything beyond the reach of Mortals, it won't draw the Council of Intrusion down on me.
If Icthar finds it and turns it into a servant, he will *definitely* bear watching.
I did a quick scan for Storm Soldiers and other morons of Thanatos; the whole city was free of them. Good.
No sign of Sombra, either, who is still locked up, while Odin is busy stuffing himself with cheese or whatever he is doing. Probably looking for omens and the like. He's one of the last survivors of the Immortal Storm and I know he fears another one will come in the future.
I just know that if all goes well, Thanatos won't be around for it.
If all goes well. I laughed at myself for even thinking that.
I slept and let myself dream; I could tell you what I dreamed of, but that would tell you too much if you're sneaking in and reading this, Ivan.
Of course, I might be making this all up. How would you tell?
He hasn't tried to read my five hundred year diaries yet, which disappoints me. Admittedly, he would have to *find* them.
Only the totally fake version is easy to find. I think I went kind of overboard on it.
This one stupid hero really did believe that I rode a meteor down from the Great Girdle, destroying Blackmoor with it, though.
Being eaten by a giant weasel was a just fate for him and I only wish I could take the credit. Djaea didn't even MEAN to kill him off.
Allegedly, but then how did her alleged pet get loose, then get into a dungeon in the Broken Lands?
I tried to investigate once, but it got so implausible I decided I was better off not knowing.
I'm not a self-mutilator for knowledge like Odin.
Once I'd done enough brainstorming, then I decided I had to go see Far Sight. It's been too long. And with Odin gone, I only have to worry about Thor catching me, which is very unlikely.
*****************
Or about Heimdall, who I of course forgot still exists, because he is so boring. What use is immortality if you spend it being a border guard?
I need to figure out how he worked Plane Shift into grappling and throwing; I flew off Bifrost and then somehow found myself above Thyatis City, where I of course crashed into a garbage dump.
It may involve psionics, the loser version of magic favored by the Sphere of Thought, of which Heimdall is a member, along with Odin, who is the boss. But Odin also has his own multi-Sphere Cabal of Immortals with an interest in the Northern Reaches.
I shifted form to an old woman, a bag lady, so as to avoid attracting attention, before I made it to the baths. I could clean myself with magic, but I felt the need for a good soak. I was going to have to smuggle a message to Far Sight, but how?
Normally, I could easily do it with magic, but Odin has wards around his hideyhole, which he deludes himself will weather the next Immortal Storm. I myself suspect that if he is right and another one comes, the ancient powerful Immortals will be the first to get slaughtered.
I could smuggle myself in as a shipment of grain again. That either got past Heimdall or he let me go because it amused him. Hmm, maybe I could fake being some fruit. Frigga loves fruit.
I tried sending Far Sight a message, as it's entirely possible that he's actually out on a mission. He lounges around Valhalla more than is good for him, but Odin's Titans do get plenty of work.
Lost in thought, I failed to realize I had walked into a big man in scalemail, a mace on his hip and a shield on his back, under the big white surcoat with a black rimmed yellow lightning bolt on the front he was wearing over his armor. *A Storm Soldier*!
There were five of them.
Because I had assumed a mortal identity to avoid trouble with the Council of Intrusion, and because I am too much of a method actor for my own good, I fell to the ground as he slapped my face. "Out of the way, you old bitch! Yield for the men of Hattias!"
Ahh, Storm Soldiers. The most worthless trash on a planet which is overrun with amazingly stupid people. Being proud of your heritage as a man of Hattias (one of the provinces of Thyatis, founded by one of the three tribes that fled there like whipped puppies nigh on 2000 years ago, after being whipped in Davania) is like being proud that you successfully ate a piece of bread, yet acting like you just killed Tiamat with a spoon.
"Mercy!" I cried out. "Mercy on an old woman!"
I could turn to one of my other mortal forms, but this is going to be more satisfying. I cringed as he kicked me down and then kicked me more; I screamed in pain; at first, his companions approved, but then they looked around and saw the growing angry crowd surrounding them and tried to get him to stop.
He finally had enough, relieving whatever stress had made him keep going after the slap in the first place, only to see he was surrounded by hundreds of angry people in togas or work clothes.
"This foreign bitch attacked me! She got what she deserved!" he said angrily.
"GET THEM!" someone shouted as I cringed pathetically.
Friendly hands helped me up, though I noticed *three* people all tried to steal the money pouch I had forgotten to actually conjure. I'm too used to not needing money. Sloppy. They got me to a bench, dusted me off, and I got to watch the mob beat up those fools, while three women tried to comfort me and asked me my name.
"My name is Ignisius Aurelia and I am a Thyatian Citizen from Specularum, though my mother was Karameikan, but my father was of the Thyatian garrison and brought us home with him when he finished his tour of duty," I lied.
My actual father died several thousand years ago, squashed flat by a Fire Giant, the worst thing being that I don't think it actually noticed it had killed him. It did notice when I eventually found it, killed it, trapped its soul in a jar and gave it to demons to play with forever.
I should check on his misery and make sure some idiot didn't misfile him again.
"Now all my children are grown and my husband is dead and I have to scrape by on what they can do for me and his pension. He was slain fighting the Alphatians on the Isle of Dawn ten years ago." Real war, but of course this husband never existed.
Having finished beating up the Storm Soldiers, the mob dispersed as actual Soldiers of the Watch began to arrive. I told them my sob story about how I had been robbed and thrown in the garbage dump and they, plus the ladies, were kind enough to give me some money, more than I expected. Thyatians... can sometimes be super-generous and sometimes tight-fisted. But I know how to play people like a violin.
I could *make* them do it, but when you have been an immortal as long as me, you avoid controlling minds because it is boring. And sooner or later, backfires; mind-controlled people get stupid.
And sometimes the Council of Intrusion gets pissy about it. I would rather not spend time in time out for a century or three.
I then went and got myself a bath at the bathhouse and let my new friends pamper me, while my brain tried to think of a clever way to get in contact with Far Sight.
While I soaked in hot water, I used the fire heating it to do a scrying on the Cutie Mark Crusaders. I'm sorry, the *Immortality Mark Crusaders* now. They were busy doing homework and complaining about it. I both appreciate their desire for freedom and wish I had that opportunity as a kid. But I grew up in a radically different situation of being a human in a society that mixed farming and killing each other for no reason with periodic massacres by giants.
Where I didn't fit in because I wasn't good at stabbing and I was never going to be strong. My talent was magic, but only women practiced magic, the witches, and they didn't take male students. Basically, the male ideal was to be Thor and I was never going to be Thor.
I met Thor before he was Thor, by the way. He was just as stupid and violent and prone to idiot grudges then too.
The absolute best thing about my daughters' kingdom is that they don't celebrate big stupid violent lug-heads like Thor.
Dinky now looked up. "We're being scried! We've been made!" She dove under the nearby bed... I think this is Sweetie's room at her other sister's place, Doctor Snow Belle.
"What? We're doing *homework*," Scootaloo said. "It's totally boring but who would bust us for that?"
If I was using Immortal power, they couldn't notice me, but I'm actually impressed that Dinky could tell. And a little disappointed in Sweetie, who finally looked up from the book I think she had fallen asleep on. "Maybe Twilight is making sure we're actually doing our homework."
I popped through the fireplace, transforming in the process into Cunning Thought. "It's me, my friends. Sorry to pop in when you're busy."
Sweetie hugged me, Twist and Apple Bloom waved and Dinky crawled out from under the bed. Scootaloo nodded, then asked, "Tell me you're good at geometry?"
"You're not?" I said, actually surprised for real for once. Usually I am faking it. "That's normally an area where pegasi excel."
"I'm good at *real* geometry, like how to do the best arc from where you are to where you want to go, but this is all words and line drawings and things with names," she said, grimacing at the papers and the textbook.
"Look, lemnas are not a kind of food," Apple Bloom said. "This ain't hard, but you keep making it that way."
"I finished mine and moved on to composition," Sweetie said.
"You moved on to napping," Scootaloo grumbled.
"I'm having a hard time with it too," Twist confessed. "I can do regular math, but this is Unicorny stuff."
And that's how I, one of the high ranking Immortals of Entropy, gave a lesson in geometry to a group of fillies on their way to being mares. Since this required only a tiny part of my brain, I put the rest to work trying to figure out some way to contact Far Sight that Heimdall would not notice and would not be as annoyingly slow as Immortal Mail somehow always is, despite being run by *Immortals*.
What exactly is the Sphere of Time for, if not for this?
*************
Doctor Snow Belle entered with a tray of snacks and drinks floating in the air. She blinked at me. "Who are you?" she asked, confused.
I rose and bowed to her. "I am sorry to intrude, I am Celestia's Mother, Cunning Thought."
Her eyes widened and she dropped down to bow.... Pony bow... but the tray remained floating perfectly. Well done, young lady.
"You need not bow," I said grandly. "I just dropped by to help them out, as they are friends of mine."
"She's very nice," Sweetie said. She trusts so easily, which I fear will be the death of her one day.
But it makes her and her friends perfect for my plan.
Which I cannot discuss with Far Sight if I cannot *get ahold of him*.
I suddenly wondered if Spike could send a message to Far Sight. Can he cross planes?
My message would be intercepted but if Spike is the sender... maybe I can teach Sweetie how to do it. She will likely need it in the future. Or Dinky but Dinky is harder to read and more likely to do something insane.
Ahh, what a good idea.
"They really nee..." Then Doctor Snow Belle shut up. She probably was going to say 'work it out themselves'. Which most of them can, but it pays to give out unneeded favors sometimes, so that when you need a favor, they owe you.
"I need Sweetie and maybe Dinky too to help me with something after this, but their homework must come first." I said.
"Well, here is snacks and drinks," Doctor Snow Belle said. "I'll get more for you, your highness."
Then she fled, hooves clattering loudly on the wooden floor.
I grew up with a dirt floor. I don't think anyone even imagined the idea of a wooden floor.
"Oooh, what do you need me to do?"
"I want to teach you how to send messages with fire magic," I said. "My apologies to the non-unicorns. I suppose if Apple Bloom pays attention, though, she might find a way to do it with a device."
"I don't *need* magic to carry a message," Scootaloo said dismissively.
Twist now got a cunning look, which surprised me as she is not prone to being cunning. But how could I not approve of that? If she has some way for an Earth Pony to make this work, all the better.
"But first, we finish the homework so we can go somewhere less flammable," I told her.
"You know, Spike can already do that trick," Dinky pointed out.
"Yes, but he has his own duties and I hardly need to teach *him*," I told her.
She suspects something. Good girl. I need them to fall for my tricks, but not other people's tricks; this will be a tricky needle to thread.
We soon had even more snacks and drinks and we all went back to work to get that homework defeated.
*****************
Against the Morons: A Luna, Ivan, and Cunning Thought Story
A D&D (Mystara) / My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic crossover
Part of the Mystara's Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring canon.
By John Biles
***************
Cunning Thought's Journal Continues:
At Crusaders HQ, I put up a fireproofing spell; Dinky pointed out the library has one. If I kept a dragon in my house, I would do the same.
Another one of my avatars now informed me that five of mine and Rathanos' babies had escaped again. Rathanos was off pontificating at his followers again and had not noticed, because he is still an idiot.
So I told my avatar to round them up once they do some damage, but not too much. I need Rathanos to not give up on them, so they will have the most chances to wreck everything.
My dear little children.
I then began teaching Sweetie. She picked up the trick very quickly to my surprise and pleasure; Dinky had a harder time. Apple Bloom watched it with goggles on, then began a frenzy of making plans; I watched curiously. Immortals have vast power, but we can't do *everything*, not even a Hierarch. And I am terrible at making things. However, I have found an out... I can give birth to things which are far more perfect than I could create from scratch.
The downside, of course, is attachment. Even Thanatos, who in the end, wants to reduce all of creation to nothing, has more sentimental attachment to his puppets and minions than he would ever admit.
Scootaloo buzzed about, bored, but unwilling to abandon her friends. Twist watched curiously, but remained contemplative and quiet.
I could feel Applejack distantly; she is like... I fear if we touched, we would both explode, destroying half of Brun. Admittedly, that would be *amazing* to see and I would just move to another avatar, but the Council of Intrusion would definitely lock me up for an amazingly long time and strip most of my power too.
It still tempts me.
But I can't leave now. I have to at least try this. "Okay, try sending this message," I said, conjuring a scroll. "To Far Sight." I created a little image of him, tall and noble with a pure white coat with a cutie mark of a flaming eye. It's a fake, but everyone expects Ponies to have one, so he plays along, because he is wise. He predates Cutie Marks.
They all got big eyes, even Scootaloo and... damn me, they're all old enough to find a handsome stallion attractive. He is vastly too old for them. He would never do something stupid with someone halfway to maredom but they certainly might.
"Holy moley, is he your coltfriend?" Sweetie asked.
How can she...
Applejack approaching.
"He is an old friend of mine. Unfortunately, he lives in Valhalla and Heimdall hates me, so he is confiscating all the messages I send to Far Sight," I told them. "He is a Titan in service to Sleipnir, my dear son." Who is off with Odin or he could alert Far Sight for me.
Sweetie concentrated and the scroll burst into flame. Hopefully, Heimdall will let it go by.
Applejack drew closer. Before she arrived, I got a reply to meet in the usual place. I licked my lips at that. "Thanks, Sweetie," I said, hugging her. "Thanks all of you. I have to go now."
"Booty call time," Scootaloo said, trying to sound grown up and cynical because she's at that age.
I remember that age, though I'd rather forget it.
Hopefully, Scootaloo would never have to see a Fire Giant squash her father flat.
I laughed. "I will see you all later. Give my love to Applejack." Then I vanished in a poof of flame.
********************
There was a town here once, though it's long gone; civilization has waxed and waned in the Northern Reaches many times. It's on the rise again in Vestland; once, long ago, giants ruled these mountains and oppressed both humans and the Ponies who dwelt here. This valley in the Makkrest Mountains was once home to a village. Far Sight's village; I was born far to the north; I think where I was born is in the Heldann Freeholds now, ruled over by Vanya's trash gang.
It's just forest now; together, we were able to set Far Sight's people free and I got the daughters I wanted, and a son I wasn't looking for, but love anyway. Most importantly, Sleipnir was able to ensure his father went on as a Titan and for all that Odin drives me crazy, I know he couldn't be much safer than Odin's stupid, mail-proof fortress.
Damn you, Heimdall.
I could see Norvikk from here. I'm curious if Vestland will beat the odds or if the Northmen will fuck everything up *again*. I'm betting on fucking everything up. Too many Thors and not enough cunning folk like me.
But Vestland does seem to be trying to move beyond 'I must kill you because my Uncle called your Uncle a whalefucker twenty years ago and then my Uncle hacked yours to pieces, so you chopped my sister into one inch cubes'.
Still, most of Vestland west of the Vestfjord and south of the coast is wilderness now. There are ambitious men who have raised strongholds here and perhaps one day, the wilderness will retreat and this valley will once again hear the songs of sowing and reaping and smoke will curl gently upwards from hundreds of chimneys.
But not today. We meet here to remind ourselves of what was and what we have lost.
Far Sight understands loss like I do, even more than our children, who were never helpless, like we once were. We cannot go home again.
"Are you pretending to be melancholy again?" he asked, amused, and I nearly jumped out of my skin. Only an Immortal can really sneak up on an Immortal, unless we fail to pay attention, or the limits of mortal senses betray us in a mortal body, like this one.
But he is Immortal now, just a Titan, but that's good enough. He was born an Earth Pony, but he is an Alicorn now, like all of our family.
"You got the message," I said, nuzzling him. He was wearing scalemail, which surprised me because normally the Ponies in Valhalla wear chainmail over a quilt (without the quilt, any blow drives metal rings into your flesh, which is why no one actually wears chainmail bikinis, not even those idiot Valkyries).
His eyes followed mine. "A gift from Kagyar for favors I did him; it reflects magical energy attacks back upon their user."
What on... I didn't hear anything about this at all? "What did you do for Kagyar?" I asked curiously. "Oh... have you heard about my new babies? They're driving Rathanos insane. Even though they're exactly what he's always wanted, but not." I giggled with delight.
"So you're the mother? One of them somehow got into Valhalla and burned Thor's Chariot; he's enraged. I should have known," he said, sounding amused.
Oh, THAT is where Lawrence got off to! I couldn't find him for three days and neither could Rathanos. How did he even get all the way to Valhalla? The only direct link from Pandius to Valhalla is when Odin orders Bifrost to connect to Pandius and then you have to get past Heimdall and there's no way one of my little babies snuck past Heimdall when *I* could not.
I will have to reward him for his great deed, though. What do you get for a baby fire being, anyway? Something interesting to burn, maybe?
"And I'm afraid it's a secret," Far Sight said.
He has to know I am going to go crazy until I find out. I love secrets as long as they're not secret from me.
"So who is this 'Sweetie Belle'? One of your priestesses in Thule?" he asked me.
"You'd better sit down," I told him, conjuring a large blanket with his holy symbol and mine on it. Well, his 'cutie mark' and mine, which is also my holy symbol.
We sat down, I conjured wine and I began talking. This would take a while.
*****************
"You think..." Far Sight looked around, then said softly, "Can you be sure no one is watching?"
No. "You can never be sure but I did put up wards. It won't stop, say, Korotiku, but we're as safe as can be outside my home but I know it's got spies," I told him. At least three of my servants are traitors, but since I know who, I can use them to feed lies to my enemies.
"You really think it can work?" he asked softly.
"I hate to quote *him*, but nothing ventured, nothing gained," I told Far Sight; I felt a wave of nausea at quoting that smug bastard who muscled in on *my* project, but I couldn't think of a better way.
Far Sight studied me and I couldn't read him. His eyes... was he using his power?
"You could cease to exist, you know. This could make a huge mess," he said softly. "We are making a huge gamble."
"I know. It's why you have to come with me and visit our children now, before I start making the final preparations. And you know, I *like* messes." I made myself smile because you can never show weakness.
I now fondly remembered the time I trapped Jubilex in a prison plane and took his place for a decade, sending his worshippers to basically make a mockery of every formal event I could get them to, until that idiot Sinbad somehow *found and freed* Jubilex.
What kind of idiot goes to great effort to save Jubilex?
I suppose he probably thought there was a fair maiden or great treasure... dammit, I could have bound Jubilex into the form of a fair maiden to sucker any rescuers and I didn't even think about it!!!
I suppose it would be hard to bind a Titan like that without the Orb of the Hierarchs. It can do a lot of things to Immortals that are normally impossible, but it requires all five to cooperate to make it work, so it's only used for High Crimes against the laws of the Immortals.
If the story is true, though it may be a lie, the reason Mystara has a skyshield is that long ago, the Immortals punished a Titan named Atlas by making him hold it up for a thousand years. And they created it to punish him with that. I can sort of believe it, but why is it still around if the punishment is long over?
I suspect it's a lie to cover up some fuckup that means Mystara needs the skyshield so its atmosphere doesn't go awol. It may be related to the Rain of Colorless Fire that destroyed Blackmoor.
"Go to Equestria?" he said weakly.
"You haven't been to see them since Luna was *released from Prison*," I said chidingly.
"I couldn't go! I was on an important mission with the Valkyries!," he protested.
"Busy being ridden by Brynhildr. I bet you enjoyed that," I said. "More than seeing your daughter free after a thousand years." Drive those knives in.
"I am not into humans!" he protested. "I am in service to Odin and when he commands, I go."
I suspect this was Odin's subtle way of snubbing me. Thor, by contrast, showed up to call us both whores. Luna is not a whore.
If anything, she's driving me crazy with her refusal to bang her coltfriend. I did something wrong raising that girl.
Fortunately, Thor was not bright enough to figure out my connection to the Spelljammer crew that barbequed and ate his chariot goats after they found a way to fall off the Moon into the void during the ceremony. I don't think Thor ever caught them.
I'm quite proud of how I engineered that, but no one will ever know, except you, Ivan, assuming you're reading this and I didn't catch you. Or anyone else clever enough to get to this.
"Since you're not on a mission now, then we can go see Celestia and Luna and their coltfriends," I told him firmly.
His eyes narrowed. Like too many men, he assumes anyone who likes his daughters is scum. They're far too old for that to be a good assumption, so I couldn't help but smile. "I'm not sure why Celestia is into Big Mac, but he's a huge Earth Pony Stallion who grows apples and Ivan is a Karameikan human on the road of the Epic Hero. Reminds me of you, really."
"You said that about Sombra too," he said, frowning.
Now I laughed nervously. "Yes, but he's not connected to Thanatos, but to Full Moon." Why does Luna have to date one of that bastard's students???
But now he'll glare at Ivan and make him jumpy, which I find amusing.
For a moment, I had a feeling I was forgetting something, but I let it be. I'll remember if it matters.
"Well, I don't have a current mission, so I can do it," he said. "I suppose I'll need to change outfits."
"You can do that with a few seconds thought, dear," I reminded him. At heart, he's still an Earth Pony, not a powerful Titan. I suppose if Big Mac somehow interests Celestia long enough, he'll be like this. I expect, though, it's a passing fancy. "I'll take you to a fine pony seamstress I know. She can suit you up nicely."
He shuffled on his feet uncomfortably; a lot of stallions seem to wish their clothing would just appear from nothing. Now, mind you, as a Titan, he can conjure any outfit he wants, but I can't let him do that for his own good.
I shouldn't have even reminded him he could, really.
I put on the dress Rarity had made me; it would help butter her up. Then I extended my power and flames roared up around us. To the Land of Rarity!
******************
No one was home. The lights were out, the shop locked up and everyone gone. Was Sweetie over at her sister Snow's house because Rarity had gone somewhere?
"I don't think she's home, though we should check for dead bodies," Far Sight said.
"Sweetie would have been distraught." I cast a quick spell. 'Sweetie, can you hear me?'
'Cunning Thought, is that you?' Sweetie asked.
'Yes, dear, is Rarity on a trip?'
'She made a run to Canterlot to buy fabric for some project I'm not even allowed to think about,' Sweetie said mournfully. 'Marcus and Ivan went with her. I expect Ivan is snuggling with Princess Luna.'
I can't go to Canterlot; this has to be a surprise.
'If you need a new dress, I could make you one,' she said hopefully.
My soul told me to go with it, it would be hilarious.
But my pride told me that Far Sight has his pride and if he's going to wear a suit, it has to be the best to see his daughters, to see Luna... he really should have dropped in before now. But I suppose for folk like us, a year really can fly by like a few days.
'It's fine, dear, it will wait. Enjoy your sleepover!'
So I took him to Manehattan. Not *as* good, but it will be quite good and certainly good enough. I casually stole the money to pay for it from the vault of the Sindhi ambassador because he frankly deserves to starve in the gutter with the rest of the ruling castes of his shithole country.
But really, he won't notice, it was just a suit.
Fortunately, petty theft isn't against the rules or I would be in trouble... more trouble.
Once he was suited up, it was time to drop in on Celestia, ideally at the worst possible time.
***********************
Celestia's Work Day:
I can divide my day into four basic categories. Five. Meals, Interesting Ceremonies, Boring Ceremonies, Interesting Work, and Boring Work. This body, anyway. I have a second avatar on Pandius which does Immortal work for me and visits Luna's Library Avatar every day.
I can't sustain more than two; I think Mother has four, but usually forgets some of them for long periods of time, though I think she enjoys surprises.
I know Bogdozan somehow went rogue on her once and she had to trap that old avatar in some chasm in the planes and make a new one. Or she made that up, as Uncle Full Moon was pretty sure avatars cannot go rogue; they just may go into long sleep if you ignore them too long.
Best not to find out.
"I am fairly certain that Erik of Vestland is dead," I said to Ragnar Fasttrot; he is a Unicorn Pony from Vestland, their ambassador to us. "And will never be seen again. If he lives, he is not in Equestria." I shouldn't enjoy lying so much; I'm pretty sure I got that from Mother. Father never lies.
I was having a private meeting with the ambassador in one of parlors; this one is full of pictures of the Northern Reaches, created long ago by Luna as a sort of... well, not exactly a shrine to our father, but close enough.
We both stood by a table with two mugs of mead and some... it's a kind of spiced oats, almost like an oat stew because it has some liquid, as a snack. There was a large bowl, a dipper, and two small bowls for eating with spoons. Northern Reaches Ponies favor it.
"Erik of Vestland is a false identity. He is undoubtably alive, living under an alias. We just wish to ensure people stop associating his crimes with our nation, which is a modern, respectable country." Ragnar wore a nice blue suit; the only sign of his country's wild past was the crossed swords pin he wore over his heart. "The priests of Frigga have told us he has been reincarnated."
"Isn't everyone reincarnated after a time with their Immortal, unless they are raised to some form of immortal status?" I asked him.
"Reincarnated by druidic power, the power of the..." He pulled out a card. "Sphere of Matter." He put the card away.
"Then he is no longer Vestland's problem. I will keep an eye out for him."
"He was never a Vestlander, we know that too. Our country is tired of having aspersions thrown at it because our neighbors are barbarians!" he said angrily.
Breathe in, breathe out. "I understand. What someone like him does is beyond your control." Basically, Vestland is surrounded by trolls, horse-nomads who like to pillage and plunder and the rest of the Northern Reaches, which are full of clans who burn and plunder each other and their neighbors, though the Soderfjord Jarldoms are trying to get their act together.
He relaxed and I relaxed. "Thank you, Princess. Our relations with Equestria have always been good; this is the worst crisis I have faced since I got this job three years ago. King Harald Gudmundson seems pleased with my work, so I do not wish to disappoint him."
"Neither do I, but I am quite sure this 'Erik' will never be seen again, but if he appears, you will not be blamed for his actions," I told him.
"I think the Thyatians have been making threats. They're allied with Ostland and that means more raiding," he said, sighing. "Does Equestria get raided very often?"
"Not currently," I told him. "Some Ierendi pirates still try but we gave them a bloody nose a few years ago." The Battle of East Key destroyed an entire pirate fleet, though the casualties for our side made me wince. I could have destroyed their entire fleet, but not without violating Immortal rules and I am trying to prepare them to go on without me.
Then the fireplace, where a blazing fire raged to warm the room, suddenly flared to life, and Mother and *Father* emerged from it. I stared in shock.
The Ambassador nearly jumped out of his skin, then turned, saw Mother, and paled. "LOKI!" he shouted.
"I am Cunning Thought," Mother said primly. "In this body. And this is Far Sight, the father of my three darling children."
"Hail, Ambassador Fasttrot," Father said, then listed a seemingly endless number of names that might have been as many as forty or so generations, ending in, "Son of Dapple, who I knew as a child."
How does he even know the whole lineage? It's not one of my Sphere's powers, anyway. But Father does this all the time.
The ambassador stared, mouth open wide. Then he took a sip of mead, then bowed. "The Great Liberator. Hail."
Mother waited; she is going to do *something* if he doesn't hail her too. The Ambassador eyed her like a snake.
Luna now galloped in. "Celestia, I sensed some... Father?" she said weakly.
Now he licked his lips nervously. "My dear daughter."
"My darling Luna!" Mother said and threw herself at Luna, who went down, crashing into a couch, which broke, but of course, Mother didn't care.
"I see this audience is over, thank you, Princess, your hospitality is grand, I am going to go... inspect something..." And then he galloped off, demonstrating why he is named Fasttrot.
As Luna flailed and protested and Mother cuddled her, a painting fell down on them, impaling itself on Mother's crown. So much for an eight hundred year old piece of art.
Fortunately, mending magic is simple and does not violate Immortal Law, which is good or I would be in big trouble.
"What a pleasant surprise," I said. "I have not seen you in a long time, Father."
Odin keeps him very busy and he's basically uncomfortable with worship. Some Titans do have cults, but their Immortals have to grant them an artifact they can grant spells with.
He came over and nuzzled me, while Luna continued to flail and Mother sang some song about cuddling your baby to sleep, because of course she did. I nuzzled him back. "It's so nice to see you."
"It's nice to see you too." He glanced over at Luna, looking nervous for a moment, then calming himself. "That's enough, dear. Let her up."
Cunning Thought disengaged and easily got up. Luna flailed a bit and rose. We both have very powerful mortal bodies, but we don't have the degree of grace our Immortal Avatars have.
Father now came over and nuzzled Luna and she froze, then hesitantly nuzzled him back. "It's so nice to see you again," he said warmly to her. "I am sorry it's been so long. I don't have the freedom to gallivant about that you all do."
"So we took advantage of Odin's long visit to a cosmic brothel to smuggle him out," Mother said.
"I'm pretty sure he is not in a brothel," Luna said chidingly. "He is the Hierarch of Thought."
"Which includes naughty thoughts like you have for your coltfriend," Mother said cheerfully. "Anyway, I suppose that's what the Valkyries are for, anyway."
Father made a rumbling noise; he is the mount of a Valkyrie; the Greater Valkyries are Titans, except for Sif, who is an Immortal of Energy, and the Lesser Valkyries are mortals who are dwelling with Odin until it is time to reincarnate.
"Mother, I am pretty sure Father doesn't serve as mount to a Cosmic Hobo Whore," Luna said irritably.
"Cosmic Hobo Whore." A piece of paper appeared and Mother wrote that down. "That's brilliant. Now I'm jealous I didn't think of that myself."
Father grunted. "Brynhildr is a Titan and a woman of distinction. A great warrior who slew many *giants*."
Mother and Father liberated his people from enslavement at the hands of giants long ago and there's nothing he hates more. I don't think Mother actually hates giants, but when she's with Father, she 'hates' giants. You know what I mean.
Luna tried to bury her face in her hooves and had to flap her wings to avoid falling forwards and then I had to save half the paintings; the rest were also going to require a Mending spell; I fixed one, then decided they were safer on the floor for now.
"Ivan, Ivan, Ivan, I can tell you're spying on us, so you might as well come out," Mother said cheerfully.
He is? I don't sense anyone concealed or scrying us; I'm not sure if Ivan can use shadows to scry yet.
Nothing happened and Luna said, "He's still in my room, Mother."
"Oh, did I interrupt a tryst? Will I be finally getting some centaur babies?" Cunning Thought asked her, smiling as usual. I am never sure if she instinctively smiles or if she's faking it to annoy people by her constant good cheer as she says something insulting or unleashes some plot or prank.
"We were *sparring*," Luna said. She paused and concentrated. "But he..." She glanced at Father.
Father looked back; he can just stare at you for days, until you snap. I think I confessed to stealing all of Ixion's underwear once under the stare. This was when I was still mortal and maybe only five or so, mind you.
Luna's ears began to twitch.
"Ivan is Full Moon's apprentice, seeking Immortality, and Luna has been helping to train him. They are close friends, but no more than that, whatever Mother imagines," I said. I think they both want more but are keenly aware of the problems this would bring. Sooner or later, I think, they will at least try being lovers, but not yet.
I would normally tease her about it, but with Mother present and laying it on thick, it would be too much, also I want Father to like Ivan, and he has not always liked our lovers.
Mother made a deep rumbling noise. I am not sure what she has against Full Moon, but she hates him so much. He must have done a Stroke against her at some point, but I don't know what. She seems to resent him. Is it just because we have accepted him as part of our family? He was a critical mentor to us in ways Mother could not be, since we didn't want to join the Sphere of Entropy.
And being Cunning Thought's daughter made it hard for us to be trusted, after the stunt she pulled on the Sphere of Energy. Thor will hate her forever, but she just mocks him and laughs at him, but Full Moon gets under her skin. Twilight told me about their encounter in the Arctic regions. Mother got unusually angry but was it deliberate or a bluff?
The biggest problem with Mother is that she lies all the time, so much she can't stop. I know she loves us, but her love is like the Everfree, wild and unpredictable and sometimes dangerous, yet sometimes beautiful.
I remember when I was a novice Immortal; an Immortal came from each of the Spheres and took us to show us one of the wonders of the universe. Mother took us to Eresti, a world where once a century, the laws of magic change and they have to rediscover them. When we arrived, magic was all about alchemy based on the five Spheres, changing their balance in things. We watched as a Halfling figured out a way to refresh land ruined by pipeweed; it would only work another twenty years, but he was so proud and to my surprise, *Mother* was so proud of him, of all of them, trapped in constant change, but always adapting to it.
We then got a lecture on why the Hollow World is a hundred times more evil than anything her sphere has ever done.
I will spare you the details. That world was designed by one of the Entropics but all Immortals refrain from doing anything but watch. I am curious to see what will come of it.
Father looked at me, then at Luna.
"Why don't I arrange you two quarters and then you can meet Ivan at lunch?" I said. "Oh, we have a large stock of mead if you would like it served at Lunch."
"Hmm, yes, we will need a room for our loud lovemaking," Cunning Thought said cheerfully.
"I need a room which roughly conforms to a standard silence spell and some way to keep your Mother from dispelling it," Father said calmly to me.
"I am not sure the latter is within the power of anyone in Equestria, but I will see what I can do," I said, while Luna's mouth opened and tiny despair noises came out, then closed.
I have learned to always remain calm around Mother and Luna has not and possibly never will. It's the only way to handle Mother. Show no fear.
"Let us see to your room while Luna attends to her duties," I said calmly.
"Her duty of getting us grandchildren," Mother said. "I know you already have but people who died centuries ago do not count."
Luna winced at that. Luna had several children long ago, but they did not have the kind of spark we did and we don't know why. They were strong in magic but they lived normal lives and eventually died; it was painful to Luna to lose them.
It was among the things which eventually sent her down the road to her time as Nightmare Moon. I'm sure she worries about whether she will have to watch Ivan age and die. Though I feel confident he will succeed in his quest.
But we will have to see. I was soon chivvying Mother and Father down the hallway and trying to figure out what on Mystara to do about suitable quarters. Though it depends; sometimes Mother would make me regret not giving her supremely regal quarters and sometimes she doesn't care and I can never predict which, which I am sure is the idea.
Well.
At least I won't be bored today.
*****************
Luna's Day of Unexpected Things:
At least Mother didn't show up in the middle of us sparring, since we'd managed to rip a bunch of holes in each other's clothing. We weren't really using Whelm or my magical blade Spiral, of course, since it was just practice, but somehow we both ended up with torn up clothing, which is why I shed it all and turned to Pony form before going to see what had teleported into the castle; Ivan was off getting clothing.
We also broke our weapons twice, though... well, in Ivan's case, the first time, I managed to hook the fake Whelm's carry strap and then send it out the window, forgetting that window opens onto a drop all the way to Lower Canterlot; I saved it before it hit a building at high speed, but it broke under the force of my grab.
The carry strap is actually more of a throwing strap; it comes back if you throw it. Whelm is a very powerful weapon, though eventually, he will have to make his own.
Which could be a problem. As while he has many skills, making any kind of weapon is not one of them. I will have to consult with someone from the Sphere of Thought.
Ivan had gotten dressed, but not dressed *enough*, which meant I had to find Rarity, beg her to do something and then *pray* to the Old Ones that Mother will not find some way to cause trouble while she is unattended, though if I am lucky and no I don't actually want to think about that.
Father.
I want to see him and I am afraid to see him, for I brought shame on him; I'm sure everyone harasses him about how I take after Mother, who is not well beloved in Odin's clique. With good reason, mind you.
I sent Rarity a fire message, then realized that without Spike, she could not reply.
To my surprise, an air elemental appeared and roared out a message to meet her at the Blue Lotus.
I don't know what that actually *is*.
Neither did Ivan, but we found someone who did; it's just a cafe of Sindhi food.
With directions, I teleported to the front door and once the staff finished bowing to me more than I need or deserve, Ivan and I went to Rarity and Marcus' table, where she was busy having soup and he was busy having fish curry. With cod, but... are those green beans in it? How odd. The smell was bracing. Ivan's eyes crossed. "Marcus, do you intend to destroy your tastebuds?"
"This body has more tolerance for spices than I am used to," Marcus said.
"The soup is very good," Rarity said. It looked like a hearty but heavily spiced vegetable soup with a dozen different vegetables.
"I hate to ask but my Father is here and Ivan needs something nicer to wear," I told her.
"Is he going in human form? A pony? Belcadizian?" Rarity asked, going from 'social' to 'business' instantly. "How much time do we have?"
"Ideally, by dinner," I told her.
Rarity looked at her own food.
"A late dinner. I... yes. We have maybe two, three hours," I said nervously.
Ivan said, "I'll need a snack if I have to wait that long for dinner; our sparring made me hungry."
"Sparring," Marcus said, amused.
Ivan grumbled at him; it was weirdly like Father is with Mother sometimes.
"I cannot guarantee my best work, but I will finish this quickly and then I will need a room at the palace. Thankfully, I can now summon materials from my store thanks to Lady Carlotta teaching me the trick," she said. "I am sorry, Marcus, but they need me."
"I'll help," he said and Rarity looked relieved. "Ivan has to try a bite of this, though."
"I might die," Ivan said. "I like it spicy but not Sindhi level spicy."
"It will be fine," I told Ivan. Fine because I enchanted his biteful to have a weaker taste; Marcus and Rarity could tell, I think, but Ivan could not and was relieved.
"I have waybread; you can have some while Rarity works," I told him. I will likely need a snack myself.
Okay, crisis one averted as long as nothing goes wrong.
******************
Cunning Thought's Adventures in Daughter Embarrassing:
I actually put up the silence spell myself because I have better ways of embarrassing them. Like recording all the noises on crystal to hide in Luna's room to go off at the worst possible time.
Far Sight is something like twenty times better than Rathanos AND does not try to steal your eggs because he has manners. I made sure to keep my eggs contained because I cannot afford another child right now.
I suddenly felt he (Rathanos) was doing something stupid with our children and sent one of my Avatars to go check.
By the way, never send an Avatar to spy on Korotiku. Fortunately, it was fireproof but diving to the bottom of the Pseudo-Elemental Plane of Volcanoes is not my idea of a fun time. How did he even get his foot stuck???
It's one of the planes which basically orbits the Para-Elemental Plane of Magma. Wait, is it Quasi-Elemental... I always get those confused. It arises from the collision of the Elemental Planes of Fire and Earth and the Positive Material Plane... Para-Elemental is the Positive ones... Quasi are Negative, I think.
Is that right? Well, it doesn't matter. I had to dive through 3000 miles of magma to get my damn Avatar out of a stupid crack and he couldn't remember a damn thing.
I never really understood the power of a Hierarch until then and Korotiku isn't even the *top* Hierarch of the Sphere of Thought.
While I can make myself immune to fire and magma, it took forever and I couldn't manage a teleport lock because my Avatar had put on a teleport blocker, for reasons *he no longer remembered*.
Eventually, I had to bow to the inevitable and recycle him and make a new one even if it cost me power because he was hopelessly stupid after that.
Note - because of the amnesia, I could never PROVE Korotiku did it, by the way. A useful trick I've exploited since then.
We laid together in silence a while, as close to peace as I ever get. But my mind can't be quiet for long, even when I wanted it to. But it was Far Sight who broke the silence.
"You don't have to do this, you know," he said softly.
"I must. I became an Immortal for this. I am going to bring that bastard down. Even if it destroys me," I told him. "Especially after what he did to Luna." I could feel the heat in my voice and I could tell he did too, but he did not flinch or turn away.
"I want to see him destroyed, but he is a Hierarch, the head of your Sphere, and we are not. They have powers which dwarf even yours. And if you fail, his vengeance will be terrible beyond measure. And if you succeed... His allies within your sphere will all still be against you," he said calmly, trying to stroke my mane with his hoof... one area where humans outdo Ponies, I fear.
"I will not have a better chance," I told Far Sight. "I must do it and do it soon. Before he finds some way to get Sombra off the hook and I do something entirely stupid." The worst part is *knowing* I will do something stupid and that I will not be able to stop myself, even knowing it is stupid.
He sighed. He is more cautious than I, though he was bold in his youth. Bold without being a stupid thug, which impressed me.
"Unless you have seen something you have not told me." But I am sure he has not; he is not the type to hide things. And he is not named Far Sight for nothing.
Then his eyes glazed over and I licked my lips nervously; I have big lips in this form. And a very nimble tongue; I can pick a lock with my tongue if I have a tool to work with. He was seeing something. He could do this before he became a Titan... it was one of the bits of leverage by which I got Odin to make him a Titan. Immortals of Thought normally have no power over Time beyond the magics Mortals can use. So having someone with the sight... Sometimes I'm surprised Odin doesn't put him in a box like that stupid head.
"Zugzul is going to lead a giant army... a *huge* army of goblin warg-riders and orcs to invade Hule and burn as much of it as possible and turn all your followers into his undead slaves with that cauldron of his," Far Sight said. "The attack starts next summer."
Dammit, not now. I sent a warning to Bogdozan.
Why now? Why me? Full Moon is the one who screwed him over thousands of years ago and he's been trying and failing to get even with the man... did he just decide to take me on because he was bored with his own idiocy?
Maybe he can't sleep without a beating.
"Wait, does this happen if I fail, or is it going to happen irregardless?" I asked.
"I can tell only that whatever causes this has already been set in motion," he told me. "I am sorry I don't know more."
"Dear Far Sight, you told me something *very* important." I may have to pump more power into Bogdozan. I can't afford the distraction. Thankfully, this means I have nine months. Enough time I can afford to just do some scouting for now.
Why did it have to be ZUGZUL who survived the Immortal Storm instead of someone more intelligent, like Reticulus or Izakar or Mynopis?
I could have sworn some candidate for Immortality had destroyed that Cauldron while trying to do the Epic Hero Path. Hmm, now I wonder if I could sucker Ivan into doing it; it would help him out and help me out, so no one could complain about it.
I could...no, Hule is too big to fireproof the whole country.
I could leak something to Celestia so she feels guilty... LUNA! Leak something to her and then she and Ivan could go destroy that cauldron. Maybe the entire Elements of Harmony; they should be a match for any stupid army dumb enough to worship *Zugzul*. There's a reason the Ahfridi are gone forever, thank the Old Ones.
If they exist. I alternate between knowing they must and thinking they're a scam.
I did not need this hanging over this visit. Fortunately, long experience will let me reveal no more than I intend to.
******************
Celestia's Dinner With Family:
"Zugzul is going to invade Hule next summer, you should help your mother out," Far Sight said. "An army of humanoids will lay waste to a large chunk of it."
Mother for a moment, looked like someone hit her in the face with a trout, then said, "I was going to bring that up, dear."
No, she wasn't, I knew. I know Mother. She might want something from us, but she would be subtle.
We were in the same parlor where I had met the Ambassador, standing around a table; Ivan, wearing a very nice suit I haven't seen before, was sitting in a chair; his stew actually had meat in it.
"Zugzul? I thought he was meddling in Davania these days," Luna said, frowning.
"Well, the Lord of the Golden Chair routed his army of zebra-riders, but that was the last I heard of him; I think he went off to pout," I said, then ate some of the stew, which was quite good. I had a hearty Northern Reaches stew made, minus the beef, save for Ivan.
"I thought the Council of Dimensions had put him to work the last century or two," Ivan said.
"That ended a couple of years ago," Father said. "Gwyneth stupidly got in a fight with him in Pandius and got mauled." He shook his head, then looked at Ivan; Ivan had been introduced to him and he'd been eyeing Ivan ever since.
Then Father said, "He has the Cauldron of Rebirth. One of Nyx's experiments she abandoned, I think."
"She is to intelligent undead as Rathanos is to his stupid intelligent fire creature project," Mother said, shaking her head. "Though at least she doesn't ignore the ones that already exist like he does."
"Most elementals are dimwits; he wants something smarter," Father said. "Whereas Nyx for some weird reason wants to turn everyone into intelligent undead."
"Two words. Sex and Fetish," Mother pronounced, then wolfed down stew, while Luna looked offended by Mother's manners and I just shook my head. She wants a reaction, so I won't give it.
"So it's an Entropy artifact," Ivan said thoughtfully.
"The sort of thing Epic Heroes have to destroy. I destroyed the Head of Penaggalan myself," Father said.
I know Father's official cover is a failed Epic Hero quest but I think it basically came down to Mother somehow getting Odin to empower him, but I'm not sure. I don't know if that ever existed.
"The Head was a major player in the Taymorian Empire, Nix's greatest accomplishment," Luna said. "She must not be very happy with you."
"She's not. Or I'd go deal with the Cauldron myself, but while Nyx has supposedly abandoned it, it has been destroyed *four times* and yet somehow returned. So I would draw too much attention," Father said.
Is Father trying to get Ivan to go destroy it? He usually is very straightforward and not good at moving people around, unlike Mother. I suppose it would make a good quest for him.
"Don't you have suitable agents, Mother?" Luna said bluntly. "It sounds to me like you're trying to get Ivan to go save Hule for you."
Ivan glanced at Father. "So you hope I can do it."
"Well, my dear Cunning Thought does have her own agents, but on the other hand it is the sort of thing Epic Heroes do," Father said. "I suppose Full Moon would have to sign off on it, though, as your mentor."
Mother rumbled in her throat. "I do not wish to owe Full Moon a damn thing."
"And it would show your mettle; I have studied your records and so far, most of it is petty theft and bog-standard adventurer shenanigans. An Epic Hero must do great deeds," he continued.
Mother now choked on her stew and I had to rap her back; she spewed into her bowl, sighed and disintegrated it, then summoned more stew from the kitchen.
"Mother, you could have just sent the bowl back to the kitchen," I said a little chidingly. "Those do cost money."
"I can make a dozen just like it," Mother said, waving a hoof; the table was now covered with bowls and they were all wrong. Some were too big or small; some of them had the wrong pattern, and one of them simply evaporated in a poof of smoke. Mother then grimaced and ate more stew.
"I... wait, I have a record?" Ivan asked, confused.
I sent off the bowls; we'll find a use for them. Luna shook her head at them, then said, "Father, he's just a candidate, you shouldn't pry."
"Anyone who is dating my daughter, I have to know about," he said. "It's amazing what Heimdall knows."
"Heimdall is watching everything I do?" Ivan said in a sudden panic.
"It's complicated," Father said. Did Mother... or is he? Now I was not sure what's going on. "He did see you two making out in Elven form, though." ...
I'm pretty sure Heimdall is normally focused on guarding Bifrost, not watching... I hope he didn't see me when I ended up covered in tar the other day; I should have been paying attention but that keg cracking caught me by surprise. I suppose I should just hope he got a laugh out of it; I laughed once I got over my initial frustration. And Big Macintosh was very apologetic.
Mother stuffed her face more... is she bluffing or is she surprised? She often eats too much when she's surprised.
"We have not made out in Elven form," Luna protested. "However, I might think about..." She now turned red and stuffed her face.
Ivan looked like he might die. Normally, Mother would be laughing her ass off, but... what is she so worried about?
"Anyway, if you wish to be an epic hero, epic kissing won't do it. It takes great deeds to enter the sagas and achieve immortality. You certainly won't ever get your revenge on the Triad if you don't go out and make a name for yourself," Father continued. "If you wish to be Luna's lover, you must show yourself worthy of her magnificence."
Ivan stared at him, probably wondering how... how DOES Father know Ivan wants revenge on the Karameikan Triad?
"Father, *I* decide who is my lover," Luna protested.
"You don't seem very good at deciding," Mother said; now THAT is Mother, though she seemed oddly subdued and kept glancing at Father.
If he is suddenly revealed to be Korotiku again, like that time... has it been... so long ago... I will be cross.
"If you hadn't decided, why would you invite him to a family dinner?" Father asked. "Anyway, Ivan, despite my dear Cunning Thought's hatred of him, you should of course consult with Full Moon, as he may have other plans already. But you would certainly do your new family a favor *and* yourself if you took care of this. You're going to need to destroy at least one Entropic artifact as part of your quest."
I can't decide if Father has grown a little more cunning with age or if this is an imposter. I suppose after all these years, Mother would have to have rubbed off on him some.
Mother looked at Ivan, looked at her stew, then let out a deeeep grumble. Deep enough one of the servants hiding in the hallway in case we need them stuck her head in briefly.
I shook my head at her, then said, "I'll admit I don't know much about the Cauldron. Doesn't it just make undead? Any evil priest worth his salt can do that."
"The Cauldron can do it on a scale beyond even the greatest priest. Nyx supposedly abandoned it because it produced strong but very stupid undead," Mother said. "Of course, how often do Immortals *really* abandon artifacts? Zugzul somehow keeps getting it and then it gets destroyed. Then it shows up again."
Ivan looked Father up and down thoughtfully. "I'll talk to Full Moon about it."
Mother buried her face in her hooves. Is she trying to bluff she doesn't want this or is she using Father as her proxy or...
I wish I could have one day with her where I don't have to try and find the hidden meaning of everything she does.
"Good," Father said. "Celestia, this stew is very good." He now actually ate some of it.
I babbled on about how the stew was made, trying to figure out how to turn this conversation in a better direction.
"Perhaps Zugzul is putting out a fake cauldron and hiding the real one," Luna said hesitantly.
"In anticipation of people destroying it?" Father asked, sounding confused.
"Like with the Head of Vecna," Luna said. She laughed softly. "Some amazing idiots out there."
"I encountered a fake Hand of Vecna," Ivan said. "It actually turned the warlord who wore it into a puppet for a Hag. Who then decided Marcus had to marry her, of course."
Mother laughed very loudly at that. "Of course."
I suddenly burped up a letter from Spike. Father stared in confusion. "Oh, it's from Twilight," I said. "Pardon me."
(Dear Princess Celestia,
I just heard that Cunning Thought was here in Ponyville a few hours ago, though she seems to have only tutored the Immortality Mark Crusaders in geometry. This may be some whim, but I thought I would give you a heads up.
PS: I had a strange dream where the burritos turned out to be giant puppets and had long ago escaped. Probably just a too much pizza dream, but I thought I should tell you.
Your Faithful Student, Twilight Sparkle.)
'Burritos' is one of our codes for the two Burrowers trapped under the plateau. If they ever escape, we are doomed. Probably a too much pizza dream. None of the alarms have gone off, nor has the watcher said anything.
"I will write her back later, once our dinner is over," I said.
"What's the dessert?" Father asked curiously; he'd somehow eaten all of his stew.
"Cinnamon Buns Cake with Almond Paste and Vanilla Custard," I told him. "It's very good."
"I know," he said. "You didn't have to make food from my homeland, you know."
"But I did it because I love you," I told him and he smiled.
"I love you too, and Luna as well," he said warmly.
"I am going to kill everything ever," Mother said mournfully. "However that dessert sounds great." She'd finished her stew too.
Ivan was eating slowly, but he said, "Go ahead and serve it, I'll catch up."
It's basically seven cinnamon buns stuffed with vanilla custard and held together in a cake shape by the almond paste. It was very good and Father stuck to small talk, while Mother ate and looked distracted.
I took them to see some of the city, so Luna and Ivan could talk.
**************
Princess Luna Is Aggravated:
"Mother is using Father to try and push you into this," I said, sitting on my bed as Ivan sat on a chair nearby, stretching. "On the other hand, she's right, it would be a good way to deal with that part of your quest if Uncle signs off."
"I sent him a message, so hopefully, he'll let me know," Ivan said. "So what do you know about Zugzul? As I don't know much."
"Not a huge amount. He survived the Immortal Storm, one of the weakest to do so. He is a mid-range Immortal but seems to have stalled out there, unable to climb to the top but too strong to fall down to lower rank either. He is of the Sphere of Energy and usually resembles a flaming giant."
A flaming giant.
Father hates giants more than any of the rest of us hate anything, except Mother's hatred of Thanatos. I am not sure if Thanatos knows Mother hates him and doesn't care or if it amuses him to watch her rage impotently or if it's all a scheme or if he somehow hasn't noticed but how could he *not* notice?
"Luna?" Ivan asked hesitantly.
Does Father have a grudge against Zugzul? I never noticed it before if he does, but he seems determined to get Ivan to go after the Cauldron...
"Zugzul made a major bid to conquer the Third Thonian Empire a long time ago, in the dawn of Blackmoor, but he was defeated by time travelling heroes from another era, who somehow used a bar in Blackmoor City to time travel and don't ask me how," I said to him.
Ivan looked thoughtful. "Could it have been someone on the Path of the Dynast?"
"They were said to come from the far future, thousands of years later," I told him. "Maybe as far as our time."
Ivan paused. "Wait... all Marcus has left is the Testimony component, right? His various misadventures with Bast and the Sword and endless reincarnation took care of the rest, right?"
"Yes. But I think something unusual will be done there, since Bast basically made the normal Testimony method impossible," I told Ivan. "But getting back to Zugzul. He's unusual because Sphere of Energy people normally don't go around encouraging giant armies of conquest. Not *now*. Maybe it was different before the Storm. Sphere of Energy people normally try to get people to take up Arcane magic and promote magical societies."
"Maybe it's a bluff? Maybe he does all this stupid stuff so no one notices his real project, tucked away on some other planet or plane?" Ivan speculated.
"Maybe, but he's an amazing actor if that's true," I told him.
"Well, let me call Asterius, see if he knows anything and if this would count," Ivan said to me, then took out his amulet and concentrated.
The fireplace suddenly whooshed with blue flame and Full Moon stepped out of it. I could feel the power of it and I'm sure Mother felt it too. Which she may use as an excuse to be pissy.
"So what do you think?" Ivan asked.
"If Zugzul is anything but an idiot, he has hid it very well," Full Moon said, then laughed softly. "This would be acceptable to fulfil your Trial. I'll have to double-check with one of the Hierarchs but I can't see them making any objection. And it would put Cunning Thought in your debt, and any tiny leverage with her could be useful to you."
"Do you think she would actually care?", Ivan asked.
"Mother takes debts very seriously but Father moreso and he suggested this," I said. "Oh." It hit me. "Father is connected to the sphere of Thought as Full Moon is and as you will be. He's a Titan, not an immortal, but certainly a good stallion to have on your side." I was so worried he'd be angry with me, but I worried for nothing, it seems.
On the other hand, now I'm worried he and Mother are up to something here. Maybe Zugzul just annoyed one of them or maybe Father just wants to see if Ivan is worthy of me...
"Do you know why he is attacking next summer?" I asked Full Moon.
"He's probably just starting to organize now," Full Moon said after thinking a moment. "An army big enough to threaten Hule can't be assembled overnight. He may have a candidate for Immortality he is trying to help for the Sphere of Energy, though conquering things is more of a Time candidate's style. I'll poke around a little and you might find something useful in the Library about the area, Luna."
I sent a message to my other Avatar to start researching.
"Do I have to do this solo or can I take a team?" Ivan asked. "Because I don't think I'm ready to do it solo, unless Zugzul's people are all chumps."
Monk...oh, *chumps*.
"You must take the lead and you should take your apprentice," he said.
"Scootaloo... is pretty young," I said nervously.
"Well, taking her was a risk," Full Moon said. "But she is on this path now. Not the rest of the Crusaders, but her destiny is tied to yours."
I tried to rub my forehead, then remembered too late I am a Pony right now and whacked my forehead.
"Luna, are you okay?" Ivan said, springing over to touch my forehead, which did not help.
Full Moon blinked at me but did not judge.
"I could be better." I sighed. "I do not know if her parents will agree to this."
"Well, you can certainly do this just as a favor and not take her and it will not count towards your various Immortality tests," Full Moon said. "That being said, she's still young enough her parents are unlikely to consent, which is a problem."
Ivan grimaced. "Well, I'll talk to everyone. If she comes, they will *all* want to come."
"This could be good practice for your eventual quest," I told him. I wish we'd known this *before* he took Scootaloo but I suppose you normally take someone older. I was never Sphere of Thought, so I didn't know.
Wait, Celestia is Sphere of Energy! She might know people who know something about what Zugzul is up to. No one in the Sphere of Time will talk to me anymore. I'm still technically Sphere of Time, but...
Maybe Yav will still talk to me.
***********************
He came into the library and soon found me as I was shelving ancient scrolls. They're a pain because some of them haven't been converted to modern standards and I have to update the tags. Someone checked out a bunch of Blackmoor-era scrolls. But all non-Blackmoorean matters.
Yav glanced at it then said, "Tomorrow, Ixion will be returning five hundred items he had on long-term loan."
My eyes crossed. "What was he doing with them?"
Yav is a dark-skinned half-elf; you could easily mistake him for a Tanagoro, if not for the pointed ears and his violet eyes. Some days he looks more Elven. "I don't know, I just foresaw it as I came in through the front doors."
"Thank you for coming," I said softly.
"Do you know anything about Zugzul's invasion of Hule next summer?" I asked him.
"The last I knew, he was still pouting because the Lord of the Golden Throne slaughtered his followers in Davania. If he ever bothered to teach something beyond 'RUSH IN A GIANT TIDE' to his followers, he wouldn't lose so often. Thor's also an idiot but he at least knows how to fight intelligently." Yav shook his head, then picked up a scroll from my cart. "A Visit to Karagar, Scroll Six, by Chastag." He put the scroll down. "Didn't Karagar get destroyed by the Rain of Colorless Fire?"
"An invasion of beastmen destroyed it after the Rain weakened it," I told him. "It traded with Blackmoor but was not controlled by Blackmoor. I think this scroll is from about three centuries before the Rain destroyed Blackmoor." I began putting all ten volumes on the shelf together, into the huge empty space they'd left when checked out. "So you haven't seen anything."
He closed his eyes and sang a little song, then said, "Hmm, thousands of refugees from Hule will flee into the Divinarchy next summer. I should decide how to advise them." He achieved his immortality by creating a kingdom on the Serpent Peninsula ruled by those with foresight.
Sounds like Hule will lose or at least have a hard time of it, but that surprises me. Hule is pretty big and very tough.
Well, we will change it.
"Can you see anything about the future of the Cauldron of Rebirth?" I asked.
He concentrated, then walked into a bookcase; fortunately they're magically secured, so he bounced off it, though I now have twenty or so scrolls and books to reshelve. He began picking them up. "Sorry. All I can see is the cauldron tipped upside down with Zugzul's head inside it, while this gangly orange Pegasus backkicks it, so it rings like a bell." ...
"I must admit I would get very angry if that happened to me," he said.
Yes. Anyone would. I suppose Korotiku might laugh and say "Good Joke."
Apparently this means Scootaloo has to go but I can't take a filly into something like this.
"Why do we even..." Then Yav shook his head. "Oh, we keep accounts of destroyed cities because people might time travel to them, of course."
"Or because things from them might survive. And Father Time wants as complete a record of the past as possible," I told him.
"What do you do if history changes?" he asked me.
"The library is in a time pocket; it is insulated from any changes. This helps with figuring out if some unplanned changed happened," I told Yav. I only learned this when I started working here.
He stroked his beardless chin. "Intriguing," he said. "I've never gotten into time flow manipulation but that would be very useful for some things for me. I presume Father Time set it up?"
"I believe it required the Orb on this scale," I told him. "But I don't know. Certainly he could tell you how to do it. You might need to invest some of your power into a permanent bubble without the Orb."
We discussed time manipulation for a while and I pointed him to some books, then he said, "You should interrogate your mother and find out what she's done to Zugzul in the past as this is probably about revenge."
"Mother insists she has never messed with Zugzul because he is so stupid it would be too easy and thus boring," I said.
"I can believe that, though I think she overstates his lack of intellect," Yav said. "On the other hand, some Immortals are amazingly dumb. I don't know how Bagni Gullymaw managed to get Immortality."
Bagni is an Immortal Troll. He spends most of his time in his pocket dimension, hunting and eating things. Ka sponsored him but no one else understands *why*. There's ongoing rumors Bagni was a rare spontaneous Ascension, where you do something so amazing that you become an Immortal on the spot. There are ongoing rumors that Rafiel ascended because he was caught in the reactor explosion which caused the Rain of Colorless Fire.
Yav promised to ask around for me, but I suspect this won't come to much. But I had to try.
*******************
Ivan does Research:
Who better to go to than Twilight? I coalesced out of the shadows and... Spike panicked and nearly set me on fire. I dove over the blast. "It's just me." I was in the library; I'd been worried I'd busted into his... wait, where does Spike sleep? Twilight doesn't have a bedroom so much as a reserved bed area upstairs.
"Ivan, is that you?" Twilight asked.
"It's me. I hope you have time to tell me some things, because it looks like I'm going to be doing a dangerous quest into Hule and... is it the Empire of Dorfin IV north of Hule," I told her.
"The Empire of Dorfin IV was a fraud committed by a gnome. I guess they used that fraudulent Alphatian world map in your school," she said, half a dozen books floating in the air; she was trying to *read them all* while talking to me. "He conned the Alphatian Cartography society hard and while they've tried to issue updated maps, so many people haven't gotten the news." She turned to Spike. "Spike, I have six sets of coordinates, *all different*. We'll have to reconcile them somehow." She grimaced at one of the books.
"I've never actually attended one day of school; the only education we got in Karameikos was a kick in the head from the Lord and training in farming and hunting," I told her, sighing.
The books all clattered to the ground and Twilight looked at me with a look of indescribable sadness. "I knew that but I wasn't paying enough attention," she said softly. "Wait, why aren't you in Canterlot during a family visit? Luna's father is there, right?"
"Luna and I are gathering information for a quest," I told her, then explained it all.
"Spike, bookmark these books," she told him, and he did so; I wonder how he can tell which page, given she dropped them on the floor. "I need the updated Atlas of Brun," she continued. "And..." Her face crunched. "And then you can take an ice cream break, Spike."
He frowned. "You don't have to hide anything from me."
"I've been working you hard," she said ruefully. "Did we even eat dinner?"
"I'll make us some." He looked at me.
"I'm full," I told him.
Spike nodded and ran off to the kitchen, in the back.
"I bet you're nervous," Twilight said softly to me.
"Luna's mother tried to pretend she didn't want us involved, so she obviously has some game afoot beyond simply saving Hule," I said. "Anything you know about the Cauldron, or Zugzul or anything Cunning Thought may have done to screw with him would be good."
She conjured me a chair. Spike had apparently forgotten the Atlas, so she pulled it out and gave me a geography lesson. The lands north of Hule are known as Hyperborea and they're full of city states, wandering barbarians, and wandering monsters. They gradually get very cold.
"Zugzul normally isn't involved there at all," Twilight said, frowning. "Zugzul has a weird thing for conquest; everyone assumes it's some artifact of how things were different before the Immortal Storm, but very little is known of the pre-Storm era."
"Well, if you can believe certain records, back then, Entropy was divided into four spheres and Time, Matter, Energy, and Thought were compacted into a single sphere of Law. Which is how things are in the Nightmare Dimension now," I said. Twilight started and I smiled a little. I have been studying Immortal matters. I can read... now...
"This one Alphatian book I read asserted that the four Spheres were Narrative, Instinct, Art, and Chance," Twilight said. "Instead of Time, you built your own timeline and shaped the world by stories. Instead of Thought, you acted on instinct. Instead of solid, unchanging Matter, you made your own world by shaping chaos into solid things which would in time return to the chaos. And instead of purposeful Energy, things were driven by chance and luck," she finished. "But getting back on track, not a lot is known of Hyperborea because it's mostly wilderness surrounded by *more* wilderness. Hmm, we could try scrying for the Cauldron..."
"I think Luna is planning to use the Moon to scry," I told her.
She nodded. "I'll come with you to Canterlot and confer with Luna."
"What do you think about the Scootaloo thing?" I asked her.
"Her parents will never approve... she's too young but... this might be worth doing just as a favor to her parents. I mean, Luna's parents," Twilight said. "Far Sight is worth having on your side from what I've heard."
A good point. Also, the Crusaders may just show up for no reason, anyway.
******************
Celestia's Late Night:
Mother and Father had retreated to their quarters, but we have a busy day of keeping Mother from causing some apocalypse tomorrow. She wants to take Father to see Dash's museum, which means having to bring Dash so I can apologize in advance. I sent Dash a letter to please fly here in the morning.
Moondancer, Luna, Twilight, Marcus, Rarity, Ivan, and I met in the Blue Moon room; it's one of Luna's favorites, carefully assembled by her. There's a beautiful five hundred year old painting of a blue moon over one of the isles of Ierendi... Safari Island, I think, though it wasn't Safari Island yet, then. The walls match her hair and the carpet matches her coat and there are pictures of the night sky, mostly over the sea, but one over Canterlot as well.
The central table was blue marble streaked with black and silver; I had to conjure chairs for our human guests. Then Luna dispelled them for not matching, and summoned matching chairs. I had to laugh softly, then hide my smile.
"Should we go outside to the reflecting pool?" Twilight asked.
"I need not," Luna said. "I will scry, but this may take a while since we have no idea where in Hyperborea to look."
Twilight gave us a long and informative lecture on Hyperborea's history, fauna, and geography, using a map she'd reproduced. I will spare you the details as it would take up too much space.
"Knowing it is humanoids does narrow things down," Twilight said. "And Whelm is more potent against such, right, Ivan?"
"Yes," he said. "I'm wondering if Vanya is using Zugzul as a proxy; she has a grudge against Cunning Thought ever since the War of Five Kings."
"The what?" I asked.
"A struggle in the Savage Coast," Twilight said. "Vanya hoped to unite the Savage Coast and exploit cynnabryl users to create a great empire, and instead, Hulean agents got them to all fight each other to exhaustion, then forced everyone to pay tribute and turned all the Vanya priests and priestesses into crabs and dumped them in Tortle territory."
"And Tortle love shellfish, which is kind of ironic," Ivan said.
"All of them? Did they just keep trying until it worked?" Anyone powerful enough to be worth polymorphing usually has a decent chance to resist it. I felt sorry for the Vanya worshippers; that's a terrible way to go.
"I'm sure some of them escaped but they got the point," Ivan said. "I'm surprised Hule didn't conquer them all at that point."
I half expected Mother to barge in; instead, it was Rainbow Dash, huffing and puffing. "Never fear, Rainbow Dash is here," she said. "You can come out of the bag now, Scoots." ...
"I had nothing else to do and it's not that far," Dash said to me. "What do you need Scoots for, anyway?" ....
Luna frowned. "We did not ask you to bring Scootaloo."
Dash paused, then frowned. "Scoots..." she said as Scootaloo climbed out of her saddlebag.
"Cunning Thought came and told me and my folks Celestia needed me and I should hop a ride with you since I'm too young to ride the train by myself," Scootaloo said. "But I think I am old enough now, but hey, this was cool too. So what's up?"
"Moondancer, can you get Mother?" Luna asked her.
Moondancer licked her lips nervously, then said, "Of course, your highness."
"Mother! I'm sure you're spying," I said loudly. "Please show yourself."
No Mother but that could mean anything.
Moondancer now winked out in a teleport, and I tried to calm myself.
"I'm sorry, Scootaloo. We're going to have to send you home," Ivan said.
"My folks already said it was okay, but they didn't even ask what it is, so what is up?" Scootaloo said.
Mother probably used charm magic on them.
Mother now appeared with Moondancer and Father. "What exactly..." She blinked. "I did not realize Rainbow Dash would get you here so quickly."
"Mother, did you use charm magic on Scootaloo's parents?" I said, frowning.
"Celestia, dear, the day I need to use charm magic to get what I want from the weak-minded is the day I throw myself into the Great Crack because I will deserve no better," she said, frowning back. "I simply told them that she was needed for a secret mission and they... Scootaloo, why did they try to give us a bag of carrots?"
"Because they have a bajillion carrots from aunt Carrot Top and so I have to eat the nasty things ALL THE TIME," Scootaloo said angrily. "When I become an Immortal, I will never eat carrots again!"
Mother looked baffled, then said, "Oh, they had a surplus and wanted to give me a gift."
"Some days I wonder if they wished they'd given birth to a carrot," Scootaloo said in frustration. "Anyway, there had better not be any carrots."
"I guess I won't be bringing any of my soup, then," Ivan said weakly.
So Mother just lied to them.
"Well, you need her; her presence has been foreseen, so if you don't bring her, either you will make a hole in time or time will bend over backwards to *make it happen*," Father said. "And Immortals can't let holes be punched in time."
Time holes are terrible things. "History can be changed," I said. "It's not inevitable. History gets changed all the time. It would be hard for Time Immortals to be born if that wasn't possible."
"I want to go... whatever it is... you must need a really great pilot," Scootaloo said.
But probably the Crusaders will all try to get in on this and...
Luna said "I think we should all get some sleep. It is late and I need time to decide what to do."
"You *could* tell me what we're doing," Scootaloo said.
"That has yet to be determined," Luna said wearily. "Let's all go to bed."
"Don't make too much noise with Ivan," Mother said cheerfully.
Luna buried her face in her hooves and forelegs.
Father just rolled his eyes, then said, "Come on, dear."
They both vanished.
"But..." Scootaloo said weakly.
"I don't get it either, Scoots," Dash told her. "Let's get a room and crash. Maybe it will make sense in the morning."
It seems likely Scootaloo is meant to go but she is still so young. But adventure is in her destiny and this way, at least, she and her friends can't just bull their way into it anyway.
I will think on it too.
****************
Ivan's Late Night Conversation:
Dash and I sat on the roof. "I think it's too late to not take Scootaloo," Dash said. "She and her friends will try to follow you if you don't take her."
I guess I wasn't that much older than her when I left home, but... dammit. On the other hand, Yav apparently foresaw her being there.
"Or we could just go do it RIGHT NOW. I could be there in a few hours at most, given how fast I fly," Dash said. "And then Scootaloo doesn't have to get involved."
I was very tempted. It avoids putting Scootaloo in danger, and Dash is both very fast and a great fighter. It would be nice to have a spellcaster, but...
"Okay, fuck it, let's do it," I said. "I have a Bag of Holding now, so let me just change into my armor and get Whelm out. Once we have the cauldron, then Luna can figure out how to smash it."
"Do we need tongs or something?" Dash asked. "I assume this thing is made of pure evil. So what exactly ARE we doing?"
You volunteered without even... well, that's Dash.
Part of me wanted a caster, but if we don't go NOW, Scootaloo will find out somehow and then die and her parents will kill me.
Well... I sent Luna a summons, hoping she was free.
She soon appeared. "What's going on?"
"We three are going to do it. I'll just do it to help out your Dad, which I guess helps your Mom," I told her. "But if we dither around... I just can't take Scootaloo into this and I should have thought it through before taking her as an apprentice, but so be it."
"She's kind of both our apprentices. I'm on the same path as you," Dash said. "But yeah, she's too young."
I half-expected her to pop out of... "Better dump out your bags, make sure she isn't hiding in them."
I dumped mine too.
"Are you sure the three of us are enough? I cannot deploy my full power for this," Luna said.
"Every second we wait increases the odds of something going wrong," I said.
Dash emptied her bags, but all she had was the entire run of the Daring Doo novels, a book about eighth century Equestria and an entire crate of pine-flavored chewing gum. And half a blanket. Dash said, "Wait, where's the other half?" She shook her bags out more, then began stuffing books in.
"Let me get some rations and camping gear, just in case," Luna said and vanished.
We have to go. Before it's too late.
I still have to figure out what to do for the monument part of this. And the weapon.
As I can't count Whelm, which I began juggling nervously as I waited, and I briefed Dash on the mission.
"Yeah, we can't take Scoots, but we do need to do *something* with her," Dash said.
"We can find some starter dungeon she could handle. I wonder if the Caves of Chaos ever restocked," I mused. "That was our first dungeon delve, for Helga and I. Marcus had been on them before, but I don't know if he remembered it at the time."
I am so glad I am not on the path of Matter; Fluttershy will probably enjoy reincarnating. "How are you going to do the epic weapon, eventually?"
"No idea. I don't *use* weapons," Dash said. "Maybe I could make a ramming helmet somehow."
We discussed that until Luna returned. "Okay, Ivan, you can ride me and..."
Dash snickered.
Luna frowned. "Take this seriously, Dash."
"Come on, you could not do more of a straight line than that," Dash protested.
I mounted up, then Luna cast a spell. "This will ensure you stay on. You should lean forward and gently embrace my neck."
I did so and then we took off FAST. I hoped I wasn't erring by not taking a crew, but this guaranteed that Scootaloo wouldn't come along. Dammit, I should have taken an apprentice old enough for these things.
We flew high, high enough that everything got tiny; it was dark and Canterlot was a sea of dots of light. The countryside was a lot sparser with lights; it was weirdly like flying over a cloudy night sky; the night sky above us sparkled with stars and a half-moon shone down on us.
Canterlot soon vanished behind us; winds hammered at me and without Luna's magic, I would have been blown off her back and gone flying down below. But I knew she would never let me fall. I trusted her.
Dash kept zooming ahead, then doubling back; I suspect she doesn't know how to get to Hule; I only vaguely know.
We were moving at blinding speed, over Sind and then over desert and beyond that, mountains and then endless plains. I was starting to get kind of cold, and then I felt Luna do something and I warmed up. Thanks, Luna.
Hyperborea is a mix of grasslands and forest; I couldn't figure out the pattern; I know more rain means forest, less rain means grasslands, but why the patchy... was it human intervention?
Some of the grasslands were farms, so maybe this is slash-and-burn agriculture at work. I know there is some degree of civilization here, but it's so far from where I grew up that we don't know much. The Alphatians themselves don't have accurate maps.
We finally had to stop to rest, hiding in a patch of forest and sleeping quickly, then rising in the morning to go on. We flew over a ruined town, but we could see a few survivors, so Luna made her horn invisible and then we flew down to a group of people busy grinding flour. "What happened?" I asked. "I am Ivan of Karameikos, and this is Moonglow and Swiftwind of Equestria."
"Zugzul's forces happened. A bunch of skeevy humans and giants and red dragons and elementals burned the town and looted it for no reason!" one of the survivors said.
Another said, "Probably because Markov was part of the League of Law and the League of Chaos is now under Zugzul's sway," a second said.
"I'm just glad they didn't bring any orcs or goblins. The humans just stole, they wouldn't..." The third person leaned on what was left of the wall and began to sob.
"Hey," Dash said, embarrassed, patting their shoulder. "Given some time, you can rebuild all this."
"If they don't come back and finish the job," the third one said dolefully.
"The good news is that they stole a lot of vegetables, but they left the barley, rye, and oats untouched," the first one said. "I fear we'll all get scurvy this winter," he said. "There's only maybe two hundred of us left." Then he slumped.
"Did they take your livestock?" I asked.
"Pretty much," he said.
"We could shadowwalk to Canterlot, get supplies and livestock, bring them back. It will slow us down, but I can't leave them like this," I told her.
She nodded. "I agree."
Now we really have to be sure to stop Zugzul before he destroys these cities... he must invade in the summer because he needs to remove these obstacles *first*. That makes sense.
"We're going to have to doubleback to Canterlot to get supplies," I told Dash.
Dash made a noise, then said, "I could press on ahead."
"Do you know how to get where we're going?" Luna asked. "Because I'm using divinatory magic to guide me."
"Well, I mean, I could stay and help them here," she said hesitantly.
"Okay, that makes more sense," I said. "If you just wandered off on your own, who knows what would happen."
She gave us a hooves' up. We made some more inquiries, Dash started helping them clear rubble out of a blacksmith shop and we found some shadows and jumped to Canterlot.
****************
"Since you are helping me out, I will arrange for Hule to supply the town with what it needs," Cunning Thought said. We'd gone to see Celestia to tell her why we needed hundreds of pounds of vegetables, a bunch of livestock, and so on. Luna could order it herself but it's best to avoid surprises.
"We can arrange for it to be moved quickly," Far Sight said. "So you can get back to your quest." But he sounded pleased we wanted to help.
I was a little suspicious of how willing Cunning Thought was to help, but...
Then Rainbow Dash ran in. "Scootaloo's vanished!" she said. "I can't find her anywhere! And you two ran off without me." ...
Cunning Thought's smile... damn her.
"But you..." Luna's eyes narrowed. "Scootaloo changed herself with the candy and talked us into leaving immediately."
Dash sighed. "I'll go with you and lecture her."
"She was cunning, but I warned her that it might go wrong," Cunning Thought said mournfully. "Leaving Dash running around loose meant that her cover would inevitably be blown."
"Mother..." Celestia said, then sighed. "Let's see about getting the supplies and I can send some ponies to help them."
"And my people will help too, to make this up to you," Cunning Thought said. "But since she *is* your apprentice, you shouldn't have tried to leave her behind."
I should have found an apprentice who wasn't a kid.
"And she's the same age as you were when *you* left on your adventures with Helga and Marcus," Cunning Thought said. "So don't be a hypocrite."
Dammit.
"That's a Karameikan custom. Most of the Sheared go be sailors or try a craft, rather than going adventuring," Celestia said.
I wish Helga was here.
"I can't blame her for dreaming big. I just don't want her parents to cave in my skull," Dash said. "Well, they'd try. But you know what I mean."
"They already said yes," Cunning Thought said.
I surrender. Let's just get this moving.
*****************
Luna's Mission:
Mother kept her word; we supplied them with food for the winter and help to gather what is left of their harvest and Mother supplied more food, small beer, and a fresh set of livestock. Good quality too. Not one of Mother's tricks. And more people to help with rebuilding.
What is Mother's angle? And why is she *so* insistent we take Scootaloo?
Dash gave Scootaloo a lecture... she might listen to Dash, then she helped. Once we had the town functional, we headed on. Celestia will ensure all the helpers can get home.
We'd gone on two more days when, to my surprise, Ixion was sitting on a stump near us, in his avatar he uses on the Savage Coast. So he looked like a human Belcadizian, basically. "Thank you, Luna," he said. "For taking time from whatever you are doing to help Markov. It would have taken weeks for me to get them aid, maybe too long. I wasn't even aware anything happened." He sighed. "But as you know, even the Immortals cannot see all that happened, and I am busy with a political crisis on the Savage Coast."
"Which might be why your town got hit *now*," Ivan said, frowning.
"Wait, who are you?" Dash asked, studying him.
"I am Senor Henrique de Carabala in this body," he said; unlike his immortal form, he has curly dark hair and bronzed skin; his immortal form is golden haired and golden skinned. "But one day, you will know me as Ixion."
"The man who is trying to get the Savage Coast to unite in a league," Ivan said. "Good luck, it's like trying to convince cats to form a league."
"I know," Henrique said. "I just dropped in to thank you." He rose. "I warned Zugzul to stay away from the League but he did not listen, it seems. He has not yet learned, though he should have, that direct involvement of the kind of he favors, tends to lead to disaster. Just be careful. He cannot come against you in strength, but it is within the rules for him to become some sort of freakish half-dragon, half-fire giant monstrosity which could eat the tarrasque for breakfast, so long as it doesn't go beyond what the mightiest mortal heroes can face."
Dash said, "Man, that sounds amazing. Now I want to fight that."
"We'd kick its ass!" Scootaloo said excitedly.
Henrique looked at me.
'Ivan screwed up and took her as his apprentice, so we have to take her,' I told him. 'I will not allow her to suicide.'
'Good,' Ixion told me.
"We'd all die unless Luna broke cover," Ivan said. "Does Zugzul abide by the rules very much? I've always wondered why he's still only halfway up the Immortal Ladder when he's as old as you are. Like you, he survived the Immortal Storm, right?"
There was a long silence and I tensed. It's not easy to make Ixion angry, not *seriously* angry. "Zugzul does not understand teamwork well. He is like Thor, if Thor did not have Odin to restrain and guide him. He is like Vanya, if Vanya lacked cunning. Fire consumes and creates, but he mainly consumes. I keep trying but he keeps angering too many other immortals, who then crush his worshippers and so his power gets trimmed back. A lot of immortals start like Zugzul, then get wiser. He does not seem to learn from experience. He wrecked the giants, led the Ahfridi to destruction, helped screw up Nithia..." Ixion shook his head. "I am going to have to give him a lecture on not attacking places under the protection of other members of his own sphere."
"So how does Vanya avoid attacking places that other Time Immortals have under their protection?" Ivan asked curiously.
"Those seeking immortality in Time have to create a state and preserve it," Henrique said. "And there is always some competition inside spheres, but Zugzul overdoes it." He now rose. "I should go. Thank you for helping my people."
"It's what heroines should do," Scootaloo said. "When people need help like that, you pitch in, right?"
"Right," Henrique said. "So you shouldn't complain to your aunt about helping her out. Be seeing you." He vanished in a puff of flame.
"If that town had wanted me to waste my time on carrots, I would have burned it more," Scootaloo grumbled.
Ivan and I both laughed. That's Ixion all over.
"How did he know?" Dash asked.
"Whenever the sun is up, Ixion, like Celestia, can see whatever it shines on," I told her. "She learned it from him."
"So will Rainbow Dash be able to see everything that can see a rainbow one day?" Scootaloo asked.
"I'm not sure," I told her. "That would be a beautiful ability, though."
"My followers will be SUPER FAST," Dash said excitedly. "And super cool." She patted Scootaloo, who smiled. "Let's get some breakfast and go!"
We were soon airborne again.
******************
"Turn back or be destroyed! Zugzul has had enough of your family's meddling in his affairs!" the Red Dragon shouted at us as it charged at us through the air; we were flying over farmland; far below, farmers were gathering in the harvest while they could; to the east, it was drizzling, but the sky was clear here.
So much for surprise, but how does he know? "We haven't meddled yet!" I protested.
"Is that Zugzul in disguise?" Dash whispered to me.
"No, but he apparently told this dragon far too much," I grumbled. "This world belongs to mortals! Tell your master they're not just toys for him to play with until he loses!" And that was Mother's influence... I shouldn't have added the 'until he loses' bit.
"Take him down?" Scootaloo whispered.
I do not want to see Scootaloo get fried.
But also, how does he even... I hope Ixion didn't let something slip.
"You can tell your master he can't stop us from getting the Iron Crown before he does!" Ivan shouted.
Wait, what?
"Yeah! Mom needs a hat!" Scootaloo shouted.
What?
"The Iron Crown is not just a *hat*!" the dragon shouted.
The Iron Crown was made by Vanya, but like so many artifacts, it has kind of gone off to do its own thing and periodically shows up, enabling someone to create an empire. The last I knew of it, a chimp had it and created a chimp army and destroyed some cities down in Davania. Then he fell off a cliff somehow and the crown was lost.
"Then I'll have to get its location from you!" the dragon shouted and charged at us.
"GO TIME!" Dash shouted and... flew over it. At super-speed; this basically created huge turbulence and sent the dragon tumbling.
"Get in my bags, Ivan," I told Ivan.
He got in, then the three of us flew around the dragon, screwing up his flying until he finally threw up, crashed, and laid on the ground, sick to his stomach.
"Clever idea, Dash," I told her.
"Thanks," she said. "That was totally my plan."
Now I wonder what her plan was.
*****************
Dash's Clever Plan:
I had *meant* to ram it head on but I missed.
But I had another plan.
"Look, you turn us all into humans and Ivan into a really big Pegasus and then you ride him and navigate and we hide in the bags... hell, we could hide in the bags as ponies, but I don't know... maybe people would detect us?" I said.
"I dunno, is Ivan going to be able to handle flying very well?" Scootaloo asked. "I might have to pilot him."
"Ivan..." Luna said hesitantly.
"It's a good plan. If there's an emergency, Scootaloo can come out of the bags and help me out," Ivan said. "Make me look like a *shadow pony*, so I can use my shadow tricks too. And you can be my evil shadow elf mistress."
"Mmm, kinky," I teased them.
"The shadow elves don't actually serve Entropy," Luna pointed out. "But I can do evil mistress. That will throw them off us."
Pretty soon, Ivan was a pitch black Pegasus stallion with a cutie mark you could barely see - a big black spider. Luna had become a Belcadizian style Elf clad in black leather pants and this weird thing that covered her breasts but left her stomach bare... isn't that a vital spot for humans? Your guts are there.
And she had this glittering golden spider necklace.
Man, Ivan looked great. But I have a coltfriend, so I let Luna turn me and Scoots into Thyatians and we got in the saddlebags. Scoots studied her hands; she's not used to them. I whipped out some cards. "This will be easier than usual."
This will be kind of boring but I think they're going to enjoy it.
"Isn't he normally a palomino?" Scoots said, studying her cards.
"It's a disguise," I told her. "If I had blue skin as a human, everyone would get suspicious."
"I don't see him as a pony much," she said. "Wait, which game are we doing?"
"Oh man, if we gamble, your mother will kill me," I said. "But most of the non-gambling games need four or five ponies."
"We're bold adventurers. I've got money... I mean, we'd better stick to coppers, though," she said.
"Well, I think he and... not everyone's like me. I could turn into a potato and I'd be cool with it," I said.
"What a terrible idea," she said.
We dug out our coppers.
"I think they bang as Elves anyway," I said, then regretted my own birth.
Smoke came out of Scoots' ears. "Never remind me of that again! Sweetie says Rarity and Marcus do it every..." She gurgled. "Let's focus on the game."
"Time to take all your money," I crowed.
****************
Luna's Mission:
There were no more cities here, only goblin camps and orc 'towns'. Zugzul is massing a humanoid army here. They paid us little mind. Good thinking, Dash. You were wise to suggest this.
Dash stuck her head out. "Hey, can either of you break some gold for me? I ran out of copper."
I could hear Scootaloo laughing.
"There's a bag of copper coins; just pop the gold into it, take what you need," Ivan said.
"Someone needs to tell Marcus and Rarity to be more discreet," Dash whispered to me. ...
Ivan went into a spiral, but pulled out of it. "I don't want to know," he mumbled. "That's their business."
I know too much about it because Rarity asked me for advice. I would expect her to be discreet.
"I'll do that," I mumbled.
"Thanks, Ivan, you're a pal," Dash said and dropped back in.
Ivan hasn't tried, but... We're both...
Love makes me nervous now, after Sombra. Ivan is not Sombra, but it's hard to open up.
And he has his own issues. I suppose Marcus, after being so many things, is used to it.
"Thank you for agreeing to this," I said to Ivan.
"I need to get used to it. Also, I have to say, I look more impressive this way," he said thoughtfully.
"You look incredible," I told him, ruffling his mane.
"So do you," he said.
I am basically ripping off Arachne Prime's favorite humanoid form, but I think I look good. I'm not always sure; my instincts are still Pony instincts, though I've turned into all sorts of things.
"I can see why Dash loves flying so much," Ivan said. "I'm gonna be pretty tired by the end of the day, though."
"Your muscles aren't used to it," she said. "We'll stop before you get wiped out."
But I was glad he was enjoying it; we chatted and I told him stories about my adventures and he about his and I reveled in flight.
I think Celestia is a little more Unicorn and I'm a little more Pegasus at heart. Movement makes my problems less.
The big problem now is figuring out where the cauldron is; mortal magics generally have a range of a few miles at best and I can't... I could probably get away with using my immortal senses, but this quest won't do Ivan any good if I cheat.
"The cauldron should be in a really *big* camp, right?" Ivan asked. "Or a temple?"
"Yes," I said. "No sign of any temples, but maybe we should raid a camp for someone who might know something."
So I put up a protection from missiles spell and we bomb-dove a camp and I used magic to snatch up a goblin.
"Don't kill me, dark mistress!" he wailed, trying to hide his face from the sun.
"Where is the leader of your hordes?" I demanded.
"Towards the setting sun!" he wailed. "Bubhoshlug the Mighty has gathered his Great Horde in the Green Place!"
I dumped him back in his camp, then flew west.
The Green Place turned out to be an area along a river where everything was healthier... or had been, before Orcs and Goblins and Bugbears and Fire Giants and whatnot had moved in. They had built a crude stone fortress and a bunch of forges; everything green was burning to fuel them.
I landed off behind a ridge and got the others out. "Okay, time for us to pose as evil adventurers." Blam, Dash now looked like a pirate and Scootaloo was in black robes with a staff and Ivan stayed sexy... I mean, evil. Evil sexy.
"I can't do any magic, you know, not that kind," Scootaloo pointed out.
"So no one will think it's you," Dash pointed out.
Scootaloo looked trapped by that logic.
"This is great," Dash said, drawing her cutlass and brandishing it. "Harr, I'm the Great Pirate Stealistificus!"
It will do. "Ivan, you are Black Widower and I am Duathwen Shadowrider," I said. "We'll claim we're looking for work, then just grab the Cauldron and run."
If I try to come up with a more complex plan, Dash and Scootaloo will likely turn it into that.
Ivan looked at me. I looked at Ivan.
He nodded.
I put a little spell on the staff so it will look magical and electrocute anyone Scootaloo bashes with it. Scootaloo swung it around. "Can I be Blastfist the Lightning Mage?"
"Yes," I said.
"Awesome," she said, waving the staff around.
"What if they say no and we don't see the Cauldron?" Dash asked. ...
"Well, once we've seen inside, Ivan and I can sneak us in at night," I told her. "Good thinking."
Dash can be smart. I should have trusted her more to have some sense.
"Arr! You should have made Scootaloo my parrot," Dash said.
This is why I did not.
"No way!" Scootaloo said. "You can be the parrot!"
"It's only one letter from carrot," Dash crowed.
I let them fight a while; best to let them get it out of their system.
**************
Ivan's Mission:
Dash and Scootaloo bring out each other's inner idiot, I fear. But they got their acts together and we headed over the ridge and into the camp around the fortress. Luna just stalked along like she owned the place, while Dash and Scootaloo rode on me and I told my wings to *stop flapping*.
When we had a chance, I asked Dash, "How do you get your wings to relax?"
"Uhh... you learn as a foal," Dash confessed.
"If you're agitated, they flap," Scootaloo told me.
Dammit.
"It's going to be fine, we're here, I can amp you up if I have to," Scootaloo said. "But you flew amazingly well for someone with no experience."
"The magic provides some instincts, especially for things that are really essential, like flying for a Pegasus, or pouncing for a jaguar," I told her.
"Being human is kind of freaky, nothing personal, Ivan, but I do have to say hands are nice," Scootaloo said, wiggling her fingers.
"Well, being a Pegasus is weird to me, but I'm going to need to get used to it," I said. If Luna and I...
She is just so amazing.
I nearly walked into the gates, thinking about how beautiful she is in all her forms.
And not so dumb as my gate-ramming self.
*****************
Bubhoshlug the Mighty was a huge orc, possibly with some ogre blood; he did not have the Cauldron in his throne room, but he had a force of troll and ogre guards and a bunch of Orcish hangers-on, as he sat on his throne literally made of skulls.
And leather.
Zugzul knows how to pick them.
"I am Duathwen Shadowrider and this is my faithful steed Black Widower," Luna purred at him, slinking up close to him. Do not stare, I told myself. "I am joined by our warrior, the Great Pirate Stealistificus, and our mage, Blastfist the Lightning Mage. We are travelling adventurers, seeking some great lord who can use our services."
Dash was studying the place; there was less loot in the Great Hall than I would have expected, though there were a lot of shields and weapons on the wall taken in war... they weren't ugly Orc work.
Bubhoshlug the Mighty looked at her in a way that said what he most wanted of her. Ugh. But then he looked at an Orc who stood near him, wearing fire robes and the symbol of Zugzul (a fiery pit). He had a battle axe on his back with runes marked in red metal on his back. "You must undergo the Test of Zugzul if you are to serve the mighty Bubhoshlug," he said. "I am Grimkarak the Wise, who commands the powers of Zugzul, Lord of Fire."
"Hah, my lightning can overcome anything!" Scootaloo said enthusiastically.
"Bring it on," Dash said, forgetting she is a *human* right now and I don't think she actually knows squat about sword fighting, though it looks like... dammit, I should have loaned her Whelm. I can't use it like this.
"We stand ready," Luna said. "You will see our power and our trustworthiness."
Not a big Orc virtue, really.
*****************
We followed him through the fortress to a temple room; it was simple in style, an altar by a pit full of fire, with benches around the pit. A huge black cauldron hung by a chain over the pit of fire... surely they are not using the Cauldron of Rebirth to cook food.
Four acolytes ringed the pit, each by a burning candelabra. They began to sing. The flames roared higher.
"Pick an Acolyte," Grimkarak the Wise said. "Stand by them and thrust your hands into the fire. If we can trust you, you will not burn."
I felt Luna do something magical; an enchantment. Time to cheat.
I flew into the fire, circled the cauldron, and returned, unscathed. Hah!
Grimkarak's eyes widened slightly. "Impressive."
Each of us passed the test. Dash looked at Luna. 'Grab and go?,' she thought. Or so I guessed.
This seems too easy; on the other hand, he took a wise precaution and this is months before the actual invasion... shouldn't there be undead around?
Luna looked at me. This is my quest.
Grimkarak began praising Zugzul, and us. "Come with us," he then said. "We will show you to the King and he will decide what you can do for us. Clearly Zugzul guided you to us, for the last three groups all burned." He shook his head. "They would have made good zombies, but Zugzul does as Zugzul desires."
I have an idea already.
******************
The King looked surprised, but said, "Zugzul has guided me from a cave to a palace. I will trust his judgement."
Possibly Grimkarak has used you as a puppet, but...
"I will pay you a chest of jewels if you will recover the Iron Crown for me; rumor has it that it is in this area and I want it," The King told us.
Ahah.
"We will do it," Luna told him. "Do you know a place for us to begin searching?"
This was followed by going back to the chapel and doing a rite; a vision appeared of a mountain to the west with a cave, floating in the air. Is this a trap?
But we thanked them and headed out.
Once out of the fortress and camp, I said, "Given we lied about the crown, either this is a trap or we got really lucky."
"Why bother sending us off, though; we were inside the fortress," Dash said. "Unless maybe Grimkarak wants to kill us without the King knowing he was setting us up?"
"The fire was Zugzul's power," Luna said. "So he could have detected me, possibly, or maybe he just wants to use us for something."
"Or we accidentally prophesied, like Daring Doo did in Daring Doo and the Prophesy of the Five Mirrors," Dash pointed out.
"I thought that was time travel or something," Scootaloo said.
"Daring Doo had to make it come true after accidentally causing the prophecy, yeah," Dash said.
"You know, Daring Doo looks weirdly like someone took you and mixed all your colors with something kind of dark," Scootaloo mused.
Luna explained this but none of us understood it, then she said, "Well, let's go investigate, in case it's important or the Crown is somehow *really* there, and then tonight, we make off with the Cauldron."
So we flew off the cavern. Dash said, "Should we turn back?"
Luna cast a spell. "He is not scrying us, so yes." A simple spell reverted us all to normal, except Luna, who stayed a dark elf to my surprise.
The first part of the cave had a bear; Dash dropkicked him out. ...
He fled and did not return.
How strong is she???
I readied Whelm and we headed back into a tunnel, which led to a three way fork; no signs. "Always go left," I told Scootaloo. "That's the maze rule."
"Yeah," she said, giving me a hoof up. "Dash and I could scout down two of them while you two make out or whatever."
"Never split the party that much," I said. "This is my quest, so I will scout ahead."
"Then scream for help," Scootaloo said, grinning.
"Then jump back with my powers," I told her. It feels weird to have powers, but I guess when I am Immortal, I'll have a lot of powers.
"You need a dark place, right?" Dash said. We were operating by a glowing sphere of light Luna had made.
"I can jump into Luna's saddlebags," I said. "Thanks, Dash." I hadn't thought about that.
I got a hoof's up for her.
Scootaloo wiggled her eyebrows, then looked disappointed. I probably shouldn't ask.
Instead, I slipped ahead; I can see in the dark now too, thanks to my abilities. This is how I found the four blade traps, the two pit traps, the falling rock trap... this tunnel had better have *something*.
I jumped back. "This hallway is full of traps. Luna, can you put us in contact with... Pinkie?" She worked for a trap company in another dimension *and* she's a bard. Maybe she knows a legend.
Luna drew on the wall and chanted; a window opened and now we could see Pinkie, who was busy staring right at us. "You're not a cake!" she said. I could see she was in a kitchen.
"This is a spell for Ivan to ask you some questions," Luna said.
"So you didn't turn the oven into anything," Pinkie said carefully. ...
"No, it's just us," I said to her.
"Hey, Pinkie," Dash said, casually leaning on the wall.
I told her about our situation and described the rune which was on all the traps. Her face scrunched up. "Hold on..."
She ran out of the room, then came back with a bag hanging from her mouth, a little drawstring bag; she then opened it with hoof and teeth and dice spilled out; she carefully isolated two weird ones and rolled them. "Thirty-five! I made the Legend Lore roll!"
I looked at Luna, who shook her head at me.
"That's the mark of Gijsbert Kraaijenbrink," Pinkie said. "A Flaemish wizard who built dungeons for people in the 8th century. It sounds like you've found the missing Ultra-Death Dungeon of Blargarkarshash IV! When he died, his remains teleported to the bottommost chamber with all his treasure; he wanted to eat the souls of everyone who died in it, trying to collect the treasure! But he had the Sword of Grishnargazgazfrinkgaz! And a crown with five rubies the size of Scootaloo's eyes and the Leopard Cloak of Distgarkargag! Plus some poor Paladin's armor and the Potato of Plenty."
"Plenty of what?" Scootaloo asked.
"You plant it and then in 90 days, you can harvest a thousand potatoes," Pinkie said.
"But not the Iron Crown," I said.
Pinkie rolled the dice again. "Eighty-five. Sorry, I blew the roll, so I don't know anything."
I glanced at Luna; she shook her head.
"Is this Bard magic?" Dash asked.
"Yes," Pinkie said.
"So someone sending us there is likely meant to get us killed," I said.
"Or they want the loot. I mean, seriously, there's some impressive loot down there," Pinkie said.
"We've seen enough," Luna said. "Thank you, Pinkie."
"Of course, if your idea about the fake and real cauldron is true, maybe Zugzul hid the REAL cauldron in it and when they get it in a year, that's what causes the invasion," Pinkie mused.
Dammit. But it does make sense. "Thanks," I told her.
"Good luck!," she said.
We dropped the magic and then I said, "Well, we may have to press on but I don't know if we have time."
"Every day here is a day I don't go to school and die of boredom," Scootaloo said.
Dash rubbed her forehead. "I can't be gone too long, I'm teaching a special class. Being responsible feels so weird."
"What if we all loaded into Dash's saddlebags and I amped her up with my Cutie Mark and we just ZOOMED all the way to the end, so fast all the traps went off behind her?" Scootaloo suggested.
"I can't get up to full speed in such tight quarters," Dash said. "Not even with you helping me." Her face scrunched up.
"Epic Heroes are *cunning*," Luna said. "All three of you want to walk that path. You don't brute force a solution like the Sphere of Matter. The Sphere of Thought, your Sphere, is noted for cunning."
This would be easier if I had those lockpicks, but...
Wait...
"I can use Whelm to sense treasures; if Luna could amp up its range, we could take the shortest route to the main vault, that would speed things up," I mused.
"Maybe we could bash a straight line to it," Scootaloo said.
"Not through this much rock," Dash said. "Hmm, maybe... Scootaloo, your cutie mark lets you 'pilot' things. Does that include navigating?"
"Maybe?" she said.
"If I pulled a wagon and Scootaloo piloted it and could sense the right way to pilot me to get to the vault..." Dash said. "It's worth trying, right?"
"If we weren't hundreds of miles from home, we could borrow Aunt Carrottop's wagon but the smell *might* kill you," Scootaloo said.
"I can jump to Canterlot, buy a wagon, jump back," I said.
I think. I'm not sure of my range.
Luna watched us, looking pleased.
I hope this is cunning and not 'disaster'.
******************
The good news: Scootaloo could navigate to the Vault, but not to anything in it. But that's good enough.
The bad news: Slow progress as I had to spot and disarm trap after trap after trap.
No monsters at all, though, to my surprise.
"Probably adventurers killed them all and it has no way to restock," Luna mused.
We did encounter a gelatinous cube on the sixth level, but it was easy to kill.
We finally made it to a room with a huge adamantite vault door. "Okay, everyone get back in the hall; if I mess up, it won't blow anyone else up," I told them.
So they retreated and I took out two runes, then *sneezed* during the third. I got hit by hurricane force winds, tumbled across the room, then blew down the hallway... while my companions seemed barely affected by it.
Part of the wall where the hall bent had opened; I was going to be blown out a tunnel and fired off across the landscape to splat.
Dash flew after me and caught me, shoving me into her saddlebags. Then she pressed up. "Okay, this is kind of strong," she said.
"Yes," I shouted from inside the bag.
Scootaloo tried to press up to the door, then tumbled back. "Let's combine strength," she said.
Together, her amplifying Dash, they could reach the door; I leaned out and began disarming the other wards and traps, praying I wasn't going to take us all out.
Finally, the wind stopped and the door opened.
"That's a powerful trap," Dash said.
"Gijsbert Kraaijenbrink must have been pretty powerful," I said, getting back out.
Everything Pinkie told us was here was here, along with piles of gold and jewels. And an exact copy of the Cauldron was here too.
There was a skull with glittering jewels for teeth. "Oooh," Scootaloo said.
"It's a demilich, don't touch it," Dash said sternly.
"I was going to say that. That probably has the soul of Blargarkarshash IV in it," Luna said. "Well done, Dash."
"There was one in Daring Doo and the Tomb of the Evil Overlord," Dash said. "The former ruler of the City State of the Invincible Overlord was sending undead armies to harass it and Daring Doo went in and trapped him in her saddlebags. Then in Daring Doo and the Skull's Revenge, it escapes and comes after her."
"I haven't read that one yet," Scootaloo said. "Bad Dash, bad!" Then she covered her mouth.
The skull now rose into the air. "Master, agents of another immortal are here!" it shouted, eyes and jewel teeth glowing.
Uh oh.
A huge fire giant appeared. Zugzul. He had a huge hammer, which he pointed at us. "I can smell the stink of Asterius the Thief! The Cauldron is a test for *my* champion."
"Too bad, suckers!" Scootaloo said.
"Dash, kick the Cauldron onto his head," I shouted.
Dash backkicked it; it flipped through the air and landed on Zugzul's head.
"Scootaloo, go to town!" I shouted.
Scootaloo circled it, kicking it over and over as Zugzul shouted angrily.
I'm wondering how Zugzul thought his champion was going to get through those traps.
And then the skull began shooting rays at Luna and I as we jumped around like maniacs, while Zugzul howled fit to... okay, the dead already woke up.
I got tagged and felt it suck out some of my life force; I fell down and began digging in my bag of holding for a healing potion; Luna cast some kind of spell and the rays bounced off it, but then it set her on fire... what? When did Demiliches get fire rays?
She rolled around, but it kept putting her on *more* fire. Dash whirled around her and the fire went out, but now Dash got nailed with a ray.
But I drank my potion as Dash fell down and then I threw Whelm at the skull; it got hit, spun around and zapped Zugzul, who couldn't see it to dodge, so it sucked him up. ...
I gave Dash a dose of potion as the skull spun more, then exploded; we all got cut by shards of crystal and now Zugzul was a huge fire elemental. "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS FARCE!" he shouted.
"Scoots, toss the Cauldron into Dash's bags," I said, then dove into Dash's bags. "We can use the trap exit to escape!"
She threw it in and it knocked me out.
I should have thought of that.
****************
Luna's Escape:
I dove in and found Ivan clobbered in the bags. "Scootaloo, power up Dash and go!"
I could feel us moving at blinding speed; Zugzul tried to chase us but he couldn't match them.
I healed Ivan's injuries but let him rest, lying down alongside him to take a nap and do some research with my avatar in the Library of the Immortals.
**************
Cunning Thought's Day:
"Well done," I told Ivan, who was groggy. "But now you need to destroy it."
"We can put it in a vault; once Ivan makes his epic weapon, he can break it," Celestia said.
We were in a meeting room at Canterlot.
"You could have used your shadow powers to directly escape," Far Sight said sternly to Ivan.
Ivan slapped his face. "Blast, you're right."
"Yeah, but we did it the *cool* way," Scootaloo said defiantly.
"Also, Zugzul will seek revenge," Far Sight said.
"We just wrecked his plans and gave him a Stroke *and* since he's Immortal, killing him just means he can make a new body and seek revenge anyway," Ivan said.
"I yield your point," Far Sight said. "I am wondering what exactly was up with the priest sending you."
"Zugzul probably sensed my power and sent us into a trap," Luna said, frowning.
I made a little image of Scootaloo turning Zugzul into a bell. "In my darkest hours, this is going to comfort me," I said.
"Thanks!" Scootaloo said. "So I guess I'll need to hang out here until we figure out how to destroy it."
"You're going back to school tomorrow," Dash said. "But tonight, we party!"
*****************
They all fell asleep within a half hour.
So Celestia, Far Sight, and I tucked them into beds.
"The future has changed," Far Sight said. "Hule is saved and extends its power further north, instead. And it looks like the boy may well amount to something eventually."
I nuzzled Far Sight. "I know someone who was a callow boy with goals he didn't know how to accomplish. With Luna guiding him, he'll eventually get some sense in his head, without getting so much he gets boring."
"I must report this news to Odin," Far Sight said, then nuzzled Celestia. "It's so good to see you both again. I promise to visit more often now."
"I know about your duties," Celestia said, nuzzling him back. "Ivan is a good man. And Luna definitely got her thing for rebels from you, Father."
"Perhaps so," he said. "It's a start." Then he backed up and became a wind and blew away.
I blinked. "Oooh, nice," I said. "I should get back to tormenting Rathanos." I nuzzled Celestia warmly.
I have long suspected Thanatos uses Zugzul as a deniable tool. Having taken a look at the Cauldron reinforces this. Does he suspect my plans?
There are still more pieces to put in place, but if he's getting suspicious... or this could just be Zugzul being an idiot. Sometimes I overcomplicate things.
I am going to treasure seeing him turned into a bell forever.
"Mother, I think you've done enough to Rathanos," Celestia said.
"Words cannot express how much Rathanos needs his ego deflated," I said. "I suspect the hand of Thanatos behind Zugzul's little scheme, but I may be paranoid. He's not happy about Sombra."
"Too bad for him," Celestia said, frowning. "Do you think your own hierarch would do that to you?"
"Of course he would, he voted for Luna to be imprisoned for a thousand years after his stupid protegee set her up to get in trouble," I said angrily, then tried to calm myself. "But it's also possible Zugzul is just an idiot."
"I am not sure why he put the fake cauldron there and then hid the real one nearby inside a death trap that his chosen King could have never broken into," Celestia said, frowning. "Unless he knew Luna and Ivan were coming."
"It's not impossible. He probably has friends in the Time Sphere or with foresight talent," I said, frowning and licking my lips thoughtfully. "I suppose I could go taunt him until he confesses."
"That would probably just encourage him more to attack Hule," Celestia pointed out.
"Well, it was good to spend more time with you and Far Sight. I don't get to see him a lot, since Odin is not very fond of me," I said.
"You've given him good reason," Celestia said, then sighed.
Maybe just a little.
Time may be closing in. My one advantage is that my plan plays to all of Thanatos' blind spots. You can't fight him with power, but he persistently assumes that compassion and kindness are weaknesses.
And they are, but so is his stubborn lack of empathy and his cold heart. Connections to others will get you used and thrown away. But they can also be a source of strength. I have spent literally thousands of years figuring out how to weaponize love and joy and connections. The things he can't understand. My daughters have created an entire kingdom of people who draw power from their connections to each other. That's why the Elements of Harmony are a set.
He's never even going to see his doom coming.
I just need more time to get all the dominoes in place.
I shouldn't taunt Zugzul; I can't let Thanatos know I am on to him.
I'll figure out something. "Time for me to go look to Hule's defenses just in case," I said.
Actually, I'm going to go harass Ranathos some more, but THEN I will go make sure Hule is ready for whatever crazy thing Ixion will do if he *does* unite the Savage Coast.
If anything can.
******************
Ivan's Morning:
I woke with the dawn, still fully dressed, Luna cuddled up to me, asleep, still in dark elven form. I let her sleep until she stirred; then she jumped back and we both fell out of the bed. "Oww," I grumbled.
"Mother decided to dump us in the same bed," she said and sighed.
"It's okay," I told her. "Man, flying is awesome, but I feel half-dead; all my muscles ache."
"You flew a lot," she said, getting off the floor. "You made a very handsome Pegasus."
"I looked awesome," I told her. "I worry my wings may have given us away. I was still having wing nerves the whole time, and if the Priest knew that about pegasi..."
"I see," she said. "Well, if you practice with Dash and the Wonderbolts, you will eventually somewhat get over that, but even experienced Pegasi tend to show their emotions with their wings. I will help you too, of course."
"I should do that," I told her. "If I'm going to be Immortal, I need to get used to being all sorts of things. It doesn't come as easily to me as it does to Marcus." And if Luna and I...
Why does this have to be complicated.
"We could have a fly before breakfast," she suggested.
"Sure," I said, getting out some of my potion.
I tripped going out the window, but soaring across the sky was fun. Luna assumed her natural form and we soared together.
We don't need to rush things, whatever her mother thinks. I hope I made a decent impression on Far Sight but fathers are usually skeptical of their daughter's boyfriends.
I just have to give it time.
I mean, I'm not exactly her boyfriend yet, but...
You know what I mean.
One more milestone down, though!
******************
Princess Luna's Day:
I have to give Zugzul credit - he didn't use his Immortal form, so he didn't get busted.
I'm still not sure I really understand what's going on, though. What was the point of the fake cauldron? To draw out his enemies? To find a better user for the real one?
But I had a good time with everyone and learned I should put more trust in Dash; she thinks with her guts, but her guts have some good instincts. Scootaloo did a good job too. We might well not have succeeded without me cheating without her.
And of course, Ivan. We work together so well, but I worked together well with Sombra. There's just enough connecting them...
But no, he's a better man than Sombra ever was. He has that fire to see justice be done. As I did in my youth. And still do sometimes.
I'm just going to take it one day at a time, but I feel we're closer now. And will likely get closer still.
He was clonked out on the bed after flying. It is fun but he's not used to it and it's really intense. So I will make him some food, because he's going to be starving.
I think he made a good impression on Father, but enough of Mother has rubbed off on him over the years that it can be hard to tell.
There was a knock. "It's me, Full Moon," he said.
I stepped out. "Ivan was trying out being a Pegasus and he's wiped out," I whispered.
"He'll need to find a way to destroy the Cauldron to fully finish this part of his quest, but everything is checked and triple-checked," Full Moon said softly.
"Would it be acceptable for him to find a way to augment Whelm? Also, Dash doesn't *use* weapons," I told him.
"The latter is in debate and I think the former would fly, but I will check with Odin, since he's the Hierarch, once he finishes hanging from Yggsdrasil again." Full Moon stared off at nothing for a moment. "Some days, I am surprised he didn't enter the Time Sphere."
I told him about the whole mission.
"It being Zugzul, he probably had some elaborate plan inside his head that even Bagni Gulleymaw would think was bad," Full Moon mused. "But I had a thought. Perhaps it was a test for the Orc King to see if he could figure out it wasn't the real thing, and then he would be directed to enter the mountain. In the meantime, the priest was whittling away some of the defenses by sending in adventurers. Or possibly that was him noticing who you all were and just sending you to your death, not realizing how good you all are."
I suppose we may never know.
I woke up Ivan, and Full Moon told him everything. Ivan groggily said, "Cool. I have no idea how I am going to amp up Whelm, though."
"The Forge of Heroes is an immobile artifact in Davania. Find that and you can strengthen your weapon," he said. "You'll have to find it and overcome its guardians, of course."
"There's my next quest, then," Ivan said. "Going to want to train Scootaloo up. She did well this time but she is still young."
Full Moon nodded. "You need to take your apprentice with you. But you don't need to rush; you're still young too."
"Are you staying a while?" Ivan asked.
"I have to go," he said. "I just wanted to let you know you did well."
"I couldn't have done it without everyone," Ivan said, studying his hands; he was back to human form. Then he looked up at me. "Thanks a lot, Luna."
"I was glad to help," I told him. "Now Mother owes us a favor and that could be useful."
"If her power to make things wasn't so messed up, I could call it in to help improve Whelm, but it would probably end up a head on a stick or something," Ivan said.
Full Moon laughed. "A favor from Cunning Thought can be a dangerous thing."
We chatted with him, Immortal gossip mainly, then he left. "Let's get you some food," I told Ivan.
"Thanks," he said. "Being a Pegasus was fun. Tiring, but I enjoyed it."
Good, I thought, smiling. "We're going to be all sorts of things in the future."
I took his hand and squeezed it and he smiled at me, squeezing back.
Let's not rush anything, I thought. But it feels good to make a step forwards. He is the kind I want, we just have to get used to... physical things.
But I think we can do it. Seeing him help that town... Sombra would not have bothered. But he wanted to do it. It was his idea. I was glad to help him.
Markov will recover, and I am glad.
******************
Far Sight's Evening:
I kneeled before Tyr, who was in charge while Odin is off hanging from Yggsdrasil. "I watched him on his quest. I do not think he will go the road Sombra did."
"Good," Tyr said. "Could they tell?"
"No, sir," I told him. "And I had a nice visit."
"I envy you that," Tyr said softly, surprising me. "I'm surprised Asterius recruited him, but Asterius does seem to know how to pick them."
"He still has body issues, but I suppose it is better to take it slow," I said. "I will test him further in the future."
"You spend almost all your time as a pony, so it's best not to criticize others for body issues," Tyr said sternly. But then he relaxed. "Tomorrow, you will going with your valkyrie but do as you will for the rest of today."
I went off to think and get some food. The day is approaching quickly. I think the plan can work, but the consequences... but Cunning Thought has never been so good at that. My fear is we'll create an oscillating loop. But I'm no expert at time magics.
But it's worth trying.
Because Thanatos has to go.
I was sitting on a hill side, enjoying the sun and thinking about our plans when, to my utter surprise, a letter fell on my head in a puff of flame. Cunning Thought? But no, it was from 'Sweetie Bell', inviting me to a party on Friday, since they had 'missed meeting me' and wanted to meet me.
I had to take on a human form to write a reply; I will likely be on a mission but I should meet the Crusaders. I can't tell what Cunning Thought really thinks of them, but after watching one of them... I need to meet the rest.
A project for the future.
For now, I am going to enjoy this sunny day, for tomorrow, I may die.
Admittedly, probably not.
********************
Scootaloo's Hullabaloo:
"I'm jealous you got to go," Apple Bloom confessed. "I wonder why it wasn't all of us."
"You all would have been blown away by the wind trap and maybe gone splat before we could save you," I said to her.
We were doing homework, while Rarity darted in and out with snacks and drinks because she's all weirdly mother hen like today.
Admittedly, I like orange juice and cookies.
"We need to get moving but school's in the way," Twist said mournfully.
"Our time will come," Dinky said confidently.
This cool adventure should help me keep my sanity for at least a week. And I'll be able to brag about it for months.
That's all I ask right now.
*********************
Cunning Thought:
Now Rathanos owes Ka a favor because two of my children got into the Hollow World and wiped out one of his living museum exhibits. Good boys. They should burn that whole mess down and start over.
Then I got a message. Thanatos. Dammit.
So I went to his chambers. Basically, take the most stereotypical evil overlord hall, add more skulls, undead, souls of Storm Soldiers, and idiots. Add a giant skeleton in black.
"KEEP YOUR MINIONS OUT OF HYPERBOREA," he told me.
"My minions are not in Hyperborea, unless you count helping to rebuild Markov," I said. "Which has now sworn to me and is no longer part of Hyperborea."
"I AM UNINTERESTED IN YOUR QUIBBLING. ABANDON MARKOV, PULL OUT OF HYPERBOREA. OR I WILL SEE ABOUT ENSURING HULE NO LONGER MEDDLES IN THE AFFAIRS OF OTHERS."
"Yes, sir," I said. Defying Thanatos to his face is futile, but now he frowned at me.
"YOU ARE PLANNING SOMETHING."
"I'm going to do what you told me to do, you are the Hierarch," I told him. I am not at my best today but I didn't plan this.
"I CAN DESTROY YOU," Thanatos said. "DO NOT CROSS ME. USING YOUR DAUGHTER AS A PROXY DOES NOT FOOL ME."
I have to find out what he is up to in Hyperborea. "I will remember that."
"NOW GO," he said, and I went.
He may be bluffing me. Thanatos *can* be clever, but he's been getting more and more lost in his stupid goals and his power over time.
No one will miss him when he's gone.
Except maybe Orcus, but he's an idiot.
Time for subtle snooping and giving up my new town, dammit.
Well, you can't win them all. By my luck, this is like drawing four aces.
My plan is still on track. He'll never suspect that.
Revenge will be mine.
Enjoy your stupid cave of stupid evil while you can, Thanatos. Because when I'm done with you, you will have never existed in the first place.
And I will have the last laugh.
******************
Sweetie Bell's Tea Party:
I put a terrific amount of effort into making food for this. I had three treats from the Northern Reaches, where Far Sight and Cunning Thought are from: almond caramel cakes, oatmeal crisp cookies, and semlor (cardamon-flavored buns filled with almond paste and whipped cream). Apple Bloom brought cider and apple crisps. Twist brought five kinds of tea and eight kinds of candy. Scootaloo brought carrot cake (which she insisted I carry) and lemonade. Dinky brought strange purple cakes which were allegedly 'From the Fourth Galaxy'. They smelled and tasted like grapes, and that was good.
Cunning Thought showed up in the dress Rarity made for her, while Far Sight wore a nice suit I didn't recognize; they both had crowns, though Far Sight's kept starting to fall off. Then Cunning Thought would put it back in place with telekinesis.
"Semlor," Far Sight said, then flicked his tail around, tossed it into the air and grabbed it with one bite. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom applauded him.
"Watch," Apple Bloom said confidently and did the same trick.
If I don't take control, this is going to turn into athletic tricks with food day!
Scootaloo flapped her wings and knocked candy into the air, then swung around and ate it all. She tried to say something, choked on the candy, and Apple Bloom had to kick her back to help her out. This sent candy all over Cunning Thought, who then flung pastries at Apple Bloom and now it all degenerated into a food fight.
"MY TEA PARTY!" I wailed.
Apple Bloom and Far Sight were *literally having a duel* as to who could kick food the other had kicked out of the air.
I tried to do the fainting couch trick but it never works for me and I just wrapped myself in the rug, then rolled out the front door of our clubhouse and down the ramp.
"Sweetie!" Dinky shouted; she galloped after me, lifted the rug with her magic and towed me back in; I rolled out of it to Cunning Thought's feet.
"I'm sorry, Sweetie, we wrecked your party. I think everyone just needed to let it out a little," Cunning Thought said. She gestured and a crown appeared on my head. "Celestia wore this when she was little but her head is too big now. It should fit you fine."
I shivered, touching the gold, set with rubies. "Thank you," I said weakly.
"It's the least I can do to make up for this," Cunning Thought said.
"Get us another grand adventure, that'll make it up for it," Scootaloo said.
"You helped wreck this party," Dinky said chidingly to her.
"I will look into opportunities," Cunning Thought said. "But right now, you need to focus on your studies while you still can. The freedom of childhood doesn't last forever."
"I'm a carrot slave and a school slave," Scootaloo grumbled.
"Neither of us got to go to school," Far Sight said chidingly, shaking his head. "You are lucky to live in a time when you can."
"The Shires have schools, but Karameikos and Sind don't, but in Darokin, you have to pay after the first two years, so most people don't," I said, trying to remember the geography lesson. "Glantri has a big school for wizards, but only pay schools beyond that, in Thyatis, your family hires or owns a tutor for you or you get nothing..." I frowned. "Why do other countries put up with Thyatis having slaves?"
"Because Thyatis is incredibly powerful," Far Sight said. "And the Alphatians, who would be more powerful if they weren't so selfish, also keep slaves."
"If they weren't so selfish?" Twist asked.
"Many powerful Alphatians could destroy entire companies of troops but would rather spend their time studying exactly how many shades of purple exist, or finding the secrets of the Elemental Planes or seeing if you can really be stoned on zzonga continually," Far Sight said, frowning.
"Knowledge is power, but power..." Cunning Thought sighed. "Celestia is good at getting people to use their knowledge to help others." She looked at Far Sight. "Is Odin still hanging himself to get off?"
Get off what?
"For knowledge, yes," Far Sight said. "It shouldn't be too much longer."
"Too much is never enough," Dinky said. We looked at her. "Sorry, I just like the sound of that." She ate an oatmeal cake.
"We should clean up," Cunning Thought said; to my surprise, she did it as if she was an earth pony, though she did use magic to move the broom, instead of just magicking it clean.
"Why not use magic?" I asked her as *I* began throwing things in the garbage bag with magic.
"My physical magic is best at breaking things; it's because I am in the Sphere of Entropy. Some people demonize us, but it is our job to get rid of old, broken things, so that Thought can conceive new things and Matter and Energy make them. Then Time remembers them and wears them down and we dispose of them, closing the cycle," Cunning Thought said. "Some of my co-workers overdo it, though."
Far Sight made a noise, but did not comment.
"That's why, even though all the spheres fight each other sometimes, we're all part of the same Immortal Society. As you will be one day," Cunning Thought said.
We all couldn't help but smile at that. There's going to be a lot of pony immortals soon. We'll show them how it's done!
It was time for the Crusader song!
***************
Thanatos' Ending:
HE WENT AND HAD A TEA PARTY WITH A GROUP OF FILLIES.
Masauwu sighed. "Yes, lord, she went and had a tea party with fillies. They had a food fight. She apparently is encouraging them to think they can become immortals."
SO HE INTENDS TO USE THEM AS PUPPETS.
"Or this is part of one of her pranks," he said. "Far Sight was there, so maybe Odin is connected to this."
ODIN. HE IS CURRENTLY HANGING FOR WISDOM AGAIN.
"Which doesn't preclude him setting things in motion before," Masauwu pointed out. It's the kind of strategy Masauwu himself would employ, as I think about it.
The problem with Masauwu is that he is an amazing spy but cannot be trusted. All my agents are, unfortunately, either untrustworthy or idiots.
I will have to keep an eye on those children. But I know they are connected to *actual* candidates for Immortality.
I am going to have to rely on Masauwu, risky as that is. His first loyalty is to Talitha and always will be. If she had any higher ambition than rolling around on a giant pile of wealth (as if she couldn't just create wealth from nothing), she would be impressive. As it stands, I don't think she will betray me; I have no money to pointlessly steal.
Well, whatever Loki thinks he is doing, Masauwu will find out.
Then I just have to ensure he doesn't lie to me about it.
Masauwu's eyes widened and he rubbed them.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
"I am not sure what happened," he said, sounding unusually rattled. He glanced about the room. "I didn't actually vanish, did I?" NO.
He sighed. "This body needs some rest, I think. I will put another avatar in charge of spying on them."
GET TO IT.
Was he faking... I decided to forget about it. Even Immortals have moments of weakness.
Once I find the Hourglass, I will be able to erase this wretched excuse for an existence and return things to how they should be.
This time, the Cleansing will work.
This time.
THE END FOR NOW. |
My(stara's) Little Ponies: Friendship is Adventuring | World Map | You will notice that Equestria basically replaces the Atruaghin Clans here. |
Fairy Tail: Magic's Fire | pre | "Yeah? Where are we headed, Pinky?" Rainbow Dash asked, just as curious.
"I too would like to know," Flash Sentry chinned in.
Still running, Natsu turned his head and smiled his toothy grin at his new pony companions as he said cheerily, "To Fairy Tail!"
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"Please forgive me, sir. Things became complicated. There were these strange creatures and the Fairy Tail wizards that got in the way a-"
"SILENCE!!!" a man who's face was shadowed demanded, causing Fumio to stop abruptly in his talking, "I do not care to hear of your failure, Fumio. You failed me, you better hope I take mercy upon you, or else you can say goodbye to your pitiful little life!" the man in the shadows threatens, sending a chill through Fumio's spine.
"Y-yes, s-sir. I-it won't happen again, sir," Fumio cursed himself for stuttering.
"Good. Now, be gone! I need time alone," the man commanded.
"Yes, sir," with that, Fumio bowed and exited the room, leaving the other man alone,
"So, it seems that those pitiful Equestrian ponies have made it to Earthland , have they?" turning to the window, the man looked across the vast landscape.
"Fine then. I'll play your little game.....Celestia," |
Fairy Tail: Magic's Fire | Welcome to Fairy Tail! | Lucy: Previously, on "Magic's Fire"...........
Happy: After meeting the ponies and capturing Fumio, things were starting to be looking up for us!
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, before that feather-brain of a dark wizard cursed that guard captain and made him go all insane, blood-thirsty psychopath on us! Twilight STILL has some cuts from fighting him! But I knew she'd beat 'em! When it comes down to it, Twilight's egg-head magic is a real force not to mess with!
Lucy: EKK!!! I really don't want to think about what she could do with all that magic power!
Apple Bloom: On the bright side, we saved Mr.Flash Sentry and we were all okay in the end!
Lucy: Yeah! Now it's off to Fairy Tail!
Happy: Aye, sir!
Rainbow Dash and Apple Bloom: What's Fairy Tail?
****************************************************************************
The group of mages and ponies sat in one of the booths of the train as they made their way back to Magnolia. As usual, Natsu was slouched over in his spot as the movement of the train made his usually tan face a sickly green, trying not to barf up all the contents in his stomach. Twilight might have found it humorous to see the once reckless and head-strong dragon slayer reduced to a pitiful state if it weren't for the weird looks she, Rainbow, Apple Bloom, and Flash were receiving by the other passengers around them. Twilight never felt comfortable when ponies were looking at her to begin with, so to have beings of whom were thought to just be make-believe creatures starring at you as if you were the make-believe creature was more than uncomfortable, to say the least. Said passengers were sneaking glances at the equines with shock, confusion, and wonder clear upon their faces, young and old. Twilight could hear a little girl not too far away from their booth whisper to her mother, "Mommy, look! I told you unicorns and Pegasus exist! Can I have one?" Twilight sweat-dropped at the comment, and judging by the uncomfortable shifting and glances she saw from her fellow ponies, the young unicorn knew that they too felt unsure and out of place just as much as she did. Even Flash Sentry, who was standing in his stiff-like guard position was looking around with uneasiness swimming in his eyes. During his time in training, the stallion had been instructed how to react to a certain situation, but this was definitely not one of those situations.
Breaking the heavy silence in the air, Lucy spoke up, "So.......now that we're able to talk without crazy guards and wizards coming after us, would it be okay if I asked how you guys got caught up back in that little....incident back there?" she asked. This question caught all the ponies attention, making them all squirm a little in their spots, especially Apple Bloom. The little filly still felt guilty for ever going near that gem back in Canterlot; if she hadn't been so drawn to the object, then none of this would have happened. Then again, she was also glad that she had found the trinket, because now she had three new and special friends. Still, Apple Bloom couldn't help but wander how her family was going to react once they realized she was missing. No doubt they'd be worried sick about her, especially Apple Jack. The Cutie Mark Crusader also wandered how Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo would take the news of her absence.
"Aw, man! Apple Bloom went on an adventure with Rainbow Dash without me? Lucky!" Apple Bloom heard the young Pegasus say in her head, making her giggle.
Twilight one the other hoof, was unsure where to start. I mean, how do you tell somebody that you come from a different dimension and was brought the their world by a magical gem? Then again, she WAS a creature who, judging by people's reactions whenever they saw the four ponies, was considered to be straight out of a storybook, she supposed that being from a different dimension wasn't so farfetched. Just as she was about to open her mouth, a gold hoof shoe covered it for her, stopping her from speaking. Flash's voice responded instead, "Excuse us for a moment, miss...?" the stallion trailed off, forgetting what he should call the stellar mage.
"Lucy. Lucy Heartfilia," Lucy finished for him, making him nod.
"Miss Heartfilia. We won't be long," he concluded before taking his hoof away from Twilight's mouth and walking down the aisle, the Element of Magic following close behind him.
Once the two ponies were out of sight, Rainbow Dash crossed her front hooves and starred blankly at Lucy and Happy, "......'Sup....." was all she said.
Walking close behind the Canterlot Guard and ignoring the looks she got from the bystanders who looked at the two in awe, both stallion and mare made it to the next train cart that was, thankfully, empty. Now they could talk in peace without the constant stares they've been getting all day. Turning to face the unicorn, Flash Sentry gave her an intense, stern, and somewhat critical glare; the same one she and her friends received when they first met him, "Why were you about to tell that human about where we come from? Have you forgotten that they are strange creatures who we've just met today? We don't know them, so we can't trust them!" Flash proclaimed sternly. Twilight took a step back. She understood where the orange Pegasus was coming from, and as much as she hated to admit it, he did have a bit of a point.
After all, she did just meet Natsu, Lucy, and Happy today, so it wasn't like she knew much of their backgrounds. However, she felt she could trust them; they DID help her, Rainbow, and Apple Bloom out when Fumio showed up and did protect them when they arrived back to Hargeon from everyone who tried to catch them, especially that possessed guard captain. Not to mention that they helped tremendously in rescuing Flash Sentry. Twilight also sensed the trio's magic power, and didn't pick up on any dark or black magic. As crazy as it sounded, Twilight felt that she and her fellow ponies were destined to meet the three wizards. With that thought in mind, Twilight snapped out of her reverie with newfound courage and confidence to speak up for her human friends behalves. Upon seeing her determined expression, Flash was taken aback by her intense and strong gaze.
"I understand where you are coming from, Flash Sentry, and you have every right to be skeptical of Natsu, Lucy, and Happy," pausing in her words, Twilight took a breath like Cadence showed her, then continued, "However, they have gained our trust by saving and helping us throughout the entire day. If they wanted to harm us, or do something to us, they would have, but they didn't. I felt their magic energy, Flash Sentry, and it was not in anyway dark. They even helped to rescue you. In my book, we can trust them enough to tell them where we come from," Twilight finished. She watched as Flash thought over words, contemplating what she had said. The guard heaved a sigh.
"I suppose you are right Twilight Sparkle. I suppose we can share with them our origins, BUT they have to tell us about this 'Fairy Tail' place they speak of first, and I believe that we should wait for that Natsu fellow to get over his....condition before we tell them. He has a right to know," Flash reasoned, to which Twilight nodded in agreement. Turning around to trot out of the train cart, Twilight was about to turn the handle when a sudden, "Wait!" from Flash Sentry made her turn back in his direction in confusion.
"What is it?" Twilight asked, cocking her head to the side. The sudden outburst left her stunned, especially since it came out of the usually calm, stern, emotionless Pegasus. It shocked her even more when she saw the very stallion look to the ground sheepishly while rubbing the back of his neck with his hoof. Looking back up at the unicorn, he sighed.
"I um...just wanted to say Thank You for helping me get out of that jail, Twilight Sparkle. You could have just left me there, but you didn't, so I just wanted to let you know that I'm grateful. Thank You, Twilight Sparkle," he explained as steadily and formally as he could. Twilight's face softened and she walked over to the slightly taller pony and hugged him, causing his expression to turn into one of shock and freeze in his spot. It was his second hug that day and he'll be honest, it caught him off guard. He would never admit it, but there was a small part of him that actually liked the kind gesture. Before he could react, Twilight pulled away and smiled softly up at him.
"First off, you don't have to always have to be formal and call me by my full name. Just Twilight or Twi will do just fine. Secondly, there's no need to thank us for saving you. Your our friend, and we'd do anything for our friends," Twilight responded
Flash's eyes widened slightly at the word 'friend'. It had been a while since he had one, and he couldn't help but asked stiffly, "F-friend?"
Twilight nodded and smiled, "Of course!" she said cheerily.
"It's been a while since I've had one....." the guard said solemnly, forgetting to keep his stern and calm composure in check for once. A comforting hoof made it's way on his shoulder and he turned to see Twilight smiling at him encouraging.
"Well, you do now, and whether you like it or not, we're not going to leave you in a prison cell," Twilight concluded, before trotting out of the train cart, leaving Flash to stare at where she exited. He couldn't help the small smile the graced his muzzle, before he shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. He couldn't allow himself to open up to anyone, at least not yet. He couldn't become vulnerable. The last time he did, he got burned, badly. Even so, at that moment, Flash Sentry vowed to protect Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, and Apple Bloom from the dangers of this new world. And maybe, just maybe, he could learn how to trust again.
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When the Twilight made it back to their booth, she simply ignored the nonstop stares she received as she passed. Once she was seated, Twilight looked over to Happy, who was trying to suppress his chuckles by covering his mouth with his small paws. Looking over at Rainbow Dash, she could also tell the sky blue Pegasus was trying to keep the suggestive smirk off her lips. Raising an eyebrow, Twilight looked to Lucy and asked, "What's so funny?" Lucy simply rolled her eyes and smiled softly, lightly playing with Natsu's pink locks as he laid his head on her lap, trying to go to sleep for the rest of the torturous ride back to Magnolia.
"Happy was just commenting on what you and Flash Sentry were doing that required privacy. Nothing much, just him being his stupid, cat self. I guess Rainbow found it interesting, too, seeing as I literally had to hold her back by the tail from going over and barging in on you two," the blond teen explained, sending a dark glare over to the previously mentioned pony, who sweat-dropped nervously.
Trying to ignore the scary blond, Rainbow Dash slid over in the booth so that she was sitting next to the Element of Magic, a sly smile making it's way upon her lips, "So, what DID go on while you were alone with Flash?" she asked.
"Oh, things are getting steamy!!!" Happy chinned in, hearts bulging out of his eyes as drool made it's way down his chin.
Twilight, after a moment of thinking over her companion's words, was struck with shock as she realized what the blue Pegasus and exceed meant. Feeling her face heating up from embarrassment, Twilight soon covered Apple Bloom's ears with her hooves, not wanting the little filly's young mind be tainted by the meaning of her friends words, "Rainbow! Happy! Keep it down. We have a filly here, and before you continue, you should know that that's NOT what we were talking about!" the unicorn mare clarified, her blush still adorning her cheeks.
"Talking about what?" a gruff voice spoke up, causing everyone, save Natsu, who felt like he was going to die at any moment, to jump slightly in surprise and turn their heads to see the very stallion they were just discussing, walking back over to the booth and stare at them sternly, yet questioningly.
Twilight gulped slightly, before answering, "A-about what w-we were t-talking about in t-the other ca-cart.....~" Twilight inwardly cursed herself for stuttering.
"Uh, Twilight? You can let go of my ears now," Apple Bloom interrupted awkwardly, as the mare's hooves were still plugging her ears without even realizing it. Still feeling embarrassed, Twilight frantically removed her hooves away from the bow-wearing filly and scratched the back of her head sheepishly.
"Oh sorry about that Apple Bloom.....I forgot," the horned-equine laughed shyly.
"Sooo......can I ask what you guys are doing here and where you came from? Sorry if that sounds rude! It's just that....well...." Lucy trailed off, unsure how to tell the ponies that they were thought to be fairy tales in her world. Twilight seemed to understand, and looked over to Flash as he nodded in encouragement. It was now or never.
"Well, that's actually sort of what Flash Sentry and I were discussing in the other train cart, and don't worry about it; we already know that we are not common inhabitance of your world, just as you aren't common where we come from," at Twilight's words, Lucy and Happy starred at the unicorn, dumbfounded. Lucy couldn't help but find it interesting on how that worked. So, did that mean that humans were thought to be myths just as the ponies kind were thought to be in her world? Interesting...... After their brief pause, Twilight continued, "However, Flash and I have also agreed that if we are to be staying in this world for a while with you, then we want to know what you three were talking about in terms of this 'Fairy Tail' that you were referring to earlier. Once you give us information like that, we will tell you guys what you want to know. Sound fair?" Twilight negotiated in a business-like tone.
Apple Bloom perked up at the term 'Fairy Tail', for she remembered Lucy mentioning it before they headed off to find Flash, "Oh yeah! Lucy, ya'll said you would tell me about Fairy Tail when we got the chance, remember? Ya'll said it was a guild of some kind!" the crusader reminded the celestial mage, causing the other ponies to perk up their ears in interest and look to Lucy expectantly.
"Guild......?" Rainbow questioned.
Thinking for a moment, Lucy decided that it was only fair to answer their questions, "Well, Fairy Tail is the wizard guild that me, Natsu, and Happy belong to....." with that, the girl began to tell the ponies everything she knew about Fairy Tail, from it's purpose to it's popularity, but most importantly on how it was like one big family. She told them about her guild mates like Mirajane, Erza, Gray, Wendy, Charla, Levy, Cana, Gajeel, and so forth. She described on how the Master was like the father of the place, referring to the members as his 'children', but Lucy even told the equines, who were listening intently, about how she met Natsu and how he brought her to the guild and that he was a dragon slayer. Lucy didn't fail to mention some of the adventures she and her friends had gone on. By the time she was done explaining everything, the ponies, except Flash who was trying and failing to seem uninterested in the girl's passionate discussion of her beloved guild, practically had their jaws dropped to the floor and their eyes bulging out of their heads. Silence hovered around the group of Fairies and ponies for a few moments, before Rainbow Dash decided to break it.
"That. Is. So. AWESOME!!!!!!!" she cheered, becoming the starting point of Lucy being bombarded by questions and comments from the ponies, except Flash, who only starred in awe at the information he had just gotten.
"So, you all go on jobs!?" Twilight asked eagerly, her excited expression invading Lucy's own space.
"Everyone is a wizard there!?" Rainbow Dash asked enthusiastically.
"Does that cutie mark thing on your hand symbolize that your a wizard from Fairy Tail!?" Apple Bloom asked as her red eyes shown with wonder and awe.
"So you guys get to beat up monsters all the time and even get into fights and parties at the guild!? That's AWESOME!!!!" Dash continued.
"Do fairies even have tails? Hm, I wonder......" Twilight thought out loud, curious as to why the place is called 'Fairy Tail'.
Lucy, Happy, and the still ill Natsu felt cornered by the small space they were now trapped because of the two mare's and filly; Lucy and Happy because they didn't know how to answer all of their questions at once, and Natsu because of the claustrophobic feeling was setting into his body, which did not help at all with his motion sickness. As if knowing how they were feeling, Flash Sentry snapped out of his daze and went over to the rest of his companions and pushed the three female ponies away from the trio of wizards, "Okay, you three. I understand that this news is.....interesting, to say the least, but let's give these mages some space, especially that pink-haired fellow," the stallion reasoned, which made Lucy and Happy send him a silent "Thank you", which he simply nodded in acknowledgement.
"It's.......not....pink....y-you j-jerk...it's.....s-salmon......" Natsu managed to say between gags as his stomach churned along with the movement of the locomotive, causing Lucy to stroke his pointed locks comfortingly, which helped him relax a bit. The said jerk simply ignored the weak insult before finding his place back beside the booth the rest of the ponies sat at.
"So, you said Natsu was a dragon slayer? So he slays dragons?" Twilight asked curiously.
Lucy nodded, not stopping in playing with Natsu's hair, "He's a Fire Dragon Slayer, so that's why you saw him fight with his flames without them hurting him," she answered.
"His dad taught him how to use it. His name's Igneel, and he taught Natsu everything he knows!" Happy contributed enthusiastically.
"I want to meet this 'Igneel' guy. What's he like?" Rainbow Dash asked, already imagining meeting him and learning how to shoot fire out of her bare hooves. The very thought got her pumped to meet him.
"Well, according to Natsu, Igneel is a full-fledged dragon," Lucy said nonchalantly, as if it was common knowledge.
"A DRAGON!!!!????" Twilight, Apple Bloom, Rainbow Dash, and even Flash Sentry shouted, making all eyes from the other passengers land once again upon them, startled by their outburst.
"Yeah, don't you guys have dragons from where you come from?" Happy asked, raising a brow.
Rainbow Dash grinned widely, "'course we do! As a matter of fact, our friend is a dragon! Twilight hatched him when he was an egg and has been raising him ever since!" she explained, catching Lucy and Happy's, and even Natsu's attention, his motion sickness forgotten for the moment.
"DASH!!!!!" Twilight shouted.
"What? I'm just telling them about Spike," Rainbow Dash countered.
"Y-you....raised a.....dragon......?" Natsu asked, still slightly green. Twilight nodded bashfully.
"Y-yeah. I hatched him when I was a filly, becoming my number 1 assistant whenever I need help.....He's also like my little brother......" Twilight smiled fondly as an image flashed into her mind of her little, baby dragon. She hoped he was okay; knowing him though, he was probably trying not to have a panic attack from worry, but she knew he was probably staying with one of her other friends in Ponyville, most likely Rarity. Natsu meanwhile, was barely able to manage the small smile that crossed his lips, though it came out as more of a grimace. He made a mental note to talk to Twilight more about the subject of dragons. Maybe she knew something on Igneel's whereabouts and he could finally be reunited with his father! Laying his head back down on his partner's lap, he immediately felt somewhat better. Natsu didn't know why, but Lucy always seemed to calm his motion sickness down right when he laid down upon her lap. It was never like that whenever Erza punched him in the gut to make him lye down on her lap; Lucy was a different story. The way she ran her fingers through his hair made him feel as light as a feather, and he would always get a weird fluttering in his chest whenever he looked up at her face. He blamed it on his stomach aches, but it actually felt rather pleasing, like he didn't want the sensation to subside. the pyromaniac just figured it was because Lucy was weird, so it made him feel weird.
Apple Bloom, being the ever most observant filly she is, took notice of the fire mage's comfort when he laid back down on the blond's lap. It seemed their relationship was more intimate for them to be just friends. She had to admit, they did look cute together, "So, how long have you and Natsu been going out, Lucy?" the words slipped out of her mouth before she could even stop herself. Needless to say, this caught Lucy's and everyone else's attention, save Natsu, who was able to close his eyes and sleep, hopefully for the rest of the journey back.
"H-huh....!?" Lucy gasped, looking at the filly as if she had grown a second head, while a light blush coated her cheeks.
"Well...isn't Natsu your stallion-I mean, boyfriend or somethin'?" Apple Bloom asked innocently. Happy was silently chuckling along with Rainbow Dash as the two tried to keep the inevitable tears from leaking out of their eyes. Twilight looked rather shocked that Apple Bloom would ask such a personal question, while Flash looked indifferent, cocking an eyebrow in Lucy's direction, as if awaiting her reply. Speaking of Lucy, the stellar mage felt her face rising in temperature a hundred degrees as her steam was coming out of her ears. Where in Earth-Land did that come from? As Twilight tried to explain to Apple Bloom that it was considered rude to ask personal questions like that, Lucy tried her best to look anywhere but at Natsu, pushing him off of her lap, much to his dismay as his face began to return to it's ugly green color, and looked out the window at the passing scenery. As you can probably guess, the celestial wizard was silent for the rest of the train ride.
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When the group finally arrived to Magnolia, Natsu immediately rushed out of the train cart and kissed the cobblestone streets of the town, his motion sickness completely forgotten, "I am NEVER getting on one of those death traps again!" the dragon slayer proclaimed stubbornly once he was done kissing the ground. Lucy rolled her brown eyes at this.
"Natsu, you ALWAYS say that....." the blond wizard scoffed.
"Yeah, but I mean it this time!" Natsu countered.
"Does he always get motion sickness?" Rainbow Dash asked Happy, flying side by side with the blue exceed.
"Aye, he's always had. We think it's a dragon slayer thing. Natsu can't go on any form of transportation unless it's a living thing," Happy responded.
Rainbow Dash smiled evilly, "Well, now I know his weakness. He, he, he......." she mumbled, rubbing her hooves together as if she were devising a plan. Happy and Natsu, having heard her comment, sweat-dropped and Natsu quickly felt nervous. He had barely know the spirited Pegasus for a day and he already felt like he would need to be on guard 24/7 around her.
Not to surprising, Magnolia's residents were thrown off guard by the ponies appearance, along with the fact they were talking. People starred when they strolled through the streets of Magnolia with the Fairy Tail mages. Apple Bloom, feeling self-conscious, moved closer to Natsu as she walked beside him, unsure of what to do, "N-Natsu? P-people are starring at us~" she said in a shaky tone. Natsu glanced at the little filly and looked around the marketplace of the town to see indeed that there were bystanders stealing looks and glances at the equines. Smirking slightly, the fire mage scooped up the crusader and placed on his right shoulder, smiling up at her.
"Better?" he asked her.
Apple bloom smiled in gratitude, "Yeah, thanks,"
Lucy and Twilight smiled at the cute display between Natsu and Apple Bloom. The way he made the little pony feel more comfortable was adorable. Lucy rarely ever saw this side of her partner, and Twilight admired how her new friend could be so fierce and determined, yet still maintained a caring and child-like demeanor when it came to his friends.
"Where exactly is this Fairy Tail guild? Surely we are getting close," Flash inquired, looking around to spot their destination.
Natsu pointed directly ahead of him, Apple Bloom still secure on his shoulder, "There," was his only answer. The ponies followed his finger and, for the second time that day, starred in awe as their mouths dropped at the huge building in front of them; it was a tall structure that resembled a castle that was about four stories if you didn't count the outdoor tower where the bell was displayed, lots of extravagantly decorative windows that still gave off a simple and quaint vibe, torches lining the outside of the fourth floor, with a couple more on each side of the third floor, cobblestone red roofs, and a banter hanging from bellow the bell tower with the Fairy Tail insignia being proudly displayed upon it, showing that the structure was in fact the guild hall of Fairy Tail. A large and beautifully crafted entrance gate stood firmly in front of the massive structure, a fence coming out from each side of it to surround the guild, and the words 'Fairy Tail' engraved into a golden surface above the open, medieval styled gate. Twilight was awestruck by the place; she couldn't help but think that the designs would surely make Rarity drool from the beauty of the structure. The entire building could rival Canterlot Castle in a heartbeat!
"How did I miss that.....?" Flash almost whispered, starring in awe at the building before him.
"Aren't you suppose to be the Canterlot Guard here? If anyone of us is suppose to notice it, it's you," Rainbow Dash deadpanned. Before Flash Sentry could retort back, Apple Bloom jumped down from Natsu's shoulder and ran ahead of them cheerily.
"Come on, ya'll! Ah want to go and see what it looks like inside!" the red-maned filly exclaimed excitedly.
Rainbow Dash flew after her, "You heard the filly! Let's go!" she cheered. However, before the two ponies went through the threshold of the gate, Twilight used her magic to grab ahold of them both, halting them abruptly in their tracks.
"Hold on there, you two. Maybe we should let Natsu, Lucy, and Happy go inside first," Twilight rationalized.
Apple Bloom pouted, "Awww, but why?" the Cutie Mark Crusader asked childishly.
"Think about it; we've been getting a lot of stares the whole day, so how do you think everyone in there will react when they see four strange ponies that they thought were mere fairy tales come walking into the place with no explanation, hm?" Twilight explained. Rainbow Dash pouted and slouched to the ground as she crossed her hooves.
"...Kill-joy......" mumbled the Pegasus mare.
"I believe that is the best option. Don't worry, though; we'll have our chance at freaking them out soon enough," Flash assured Rainbow Dash, in a slightly mischievous tone, accompanied with a smirk. Rainbow returned the smirk. It was the first time the stallion had allowed a little joke escape his lips, she noticed. Natsu stomped ahead of them with his toothy grin.
"Don't sweat it! Once they see you guys, it's gonna be a real party!" the 'Salamander' assured, before stomping off to the entrance of the guild.
"We'll only take a few minutes, then we'll call you guys in and introduce you, kay?" Lucy said, following close behind Natsu and stopping to make eye contact with the ponies before continuing on. As the three mages walked and flew away, the ponies sat with their backs against the fence as the waited for their friends to call them in. Rainbow Dash slouched and pouted childishly as she waited impatiently.
"I'm booorrrred!" she whined, causing a vain to pop out of Twilight's head.
"You can wait five minutes, Rainbow! It's not like it's the end of the world!" the gifted unicorn said in an annoyed tone. The daredevil mare didn't seem to get the message.
"But Twilight!" Dash continued.
"No, you can wait!" Twilight persisted. In turn, Rainbow Dash glared at her friend.
"Sure thing, Mom!" Rainbow Dash sneered.
Twilight glared dangerously, "I am NOT your mother, Dash. Stop being so dramatic!"
"Well, stop acting like you are my mom, Mom!" Rainbow Dash spat.
As the two Elements of Harmony continued to bicker back and forth, Flash Sentry and Apple Bloom sat and watched the scene on the sidelines, sweat-dropping when the two mares continued to throw lame insults at one another. It was kind of shocking to see Twilight, the usually calm and collected unicorn mare, lose her cool so easily. I suppose being around Natsu had somehow rubbed off on her, but one thing was certain: these next few minutes were going to be very long...........
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As Natsu, Lucy, and Happy made their way to the entry doors, They couldn't help but think about how much their lives have changed in such a short amount of time, "What a day....." Lucy breathed tiredly. Natsu turned to look at her and just smiled his goofy grin at her. He knew Lucy was still shocked from everything that happened today, but that didn't necessarily mean it was bad.
"I know. Isn't it awesome, Luce?" He asked cheerily.
"Aye!" Happy replied.
Lucy gave a soft smile. No matter what happened, those two would never change, "Yeah, it is pretty awesome. It's just so much to take in, is all," Lucy explain. Natsu smiled and slung his arm over her shoulders, oblivious to her blush.
"Don't sweat it, Luce! We've got some new friends to pick fights with and go on missions with! And didn't you hear Twilight? She said that she literally raised a dragon, and still is! I bet she knows where Igneel is!" the dragon slayer added happily, hugging the celestial Mage closer to his side, which did nothing to help the blush that was quickly spreading on her face. Without even realizing it, the trio of wizards made it to the double doors of Fairy Tail. Lucy sighed.
"You ready to tell them?" She asked.
"HELL YEAH!!!!" Natsu replied, kicking the two doors open with a loud bang, catching everybody in the guild's attention, "WE'RE BAAACK!!!!!!!!!" Natsu shouted at the top of his lungs, which was no surprise. Lucy and Happy sweat-dropped at his action.
"Why does he always feel the need to make an entrance?" The blond girl sighed.
"That's Natsu for ya," Happy shrugged.
"Oy, Ash-for-Brains! What took ya so long!? Job too difficult for your ant-sized brain?" Gray taunted, coming up to Natsu, not so surprisingly with only his boxers on.
Natsu glared at the ice wizard angrily, "WHAT WAS THAT, STRIPPER!!!!???" he retorted, charging forward and starting to throw punches and kicks at his rival, who began doing the same. Erza went to stop the fight, but ended up getting involved in the fighting as well. Within seconds, most of the guild was fighting as well, brawling like no tomarrow, making a huge dust cloud surround them all. No surprises right there.
"WHAT IN CELESTIA'S NAME IS GOING ON HERE!!!!???" shouted a voice from the doorway. Everyone, startled by the shout, turned to the owner of the voice, only to be left speechless; standing in the doorway, were the ponies, all of which with surprised and slightly concerned faces. Even Flash Sentry was at a loss for words as he observed the inhabitance of the guild. Speaking of the guild, everyone, save for Natsu, Lucy, and Happy, were in the same boat as the ponies. They were frozen, still in the positions they were in while they were fighting, starring stupidly at the four equines with amazement, shock, and confusion. Basically the same reactions as the bystanders from the train and Hargeon. No one moved. No one spoke. A heavy silence filled the air as the ponies and wizards just starred at each other, wondering who would make the next move.
"Oh, hey, guys! Thought you were waiting outside!" Natsu finally broke the silence, his trademark grin appearing on his face. His comrades looked at him in confusion; Natsu knew these creatures? It was Twilight who hesitantly spoke up.
"We were, but then we heard a commotion coming from inside here, so we decided to see if anything was wrong....." the unicorn answered honestly.
"THEY CAN TALK!!!!????" the guild members exclaimed. To say they were all shocked would have been the understatement of the year.
"What is with you humans freaking out every time you see or hear us speak!?" Rainbow Dash hoof-palmed herself.
"It's not their fault, Rainbow Dash! Remember, their not used to seeing ponies like us!" Apple Bloom reasoned.
"She is right, you know. After all, we are from a different world," Flash agreed.
"Okay, can we just slow down for a second. Everyone, meet Twilight Sparkle-" Lucy gestured to the unicorn who bowed respectfully, "-Rainbow Dash-" at the mention of her name, Dash placed a pair of shades over her eyes and smiled cockily, offering a "Sup," while she was at it, "-Apple Bloom-" Lucy pointed to the said filly, who smiled widely and offered a cute "Howdy," which made some members go "awww," at. Finally, Lucy pointed to the royal guard, "-and Flash Sentry," who offered a simple nod. Another moment of silence, before:
"THEY ARE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!" all the wizards except for Natsu, Lucy, and Happy, shrieked as they all bolted to the ponies, who cowered away, overwhelmed by the sudden attention they were getting. Rainbow Dash and Flash Sentry were clearly annoyed by the comment of them being 'cute', but they were too flustered by the crown to do anything about it. They were bombarded by questions on where they came from and comments about how cute or adorable they were. It only seemed to intensify by the second. Twilight felt so overwhelmed; she suddenly felt bad for cornering Lucy, Natsu, and Happy while they were on the train, and she could tell that the other ponies were feeling just as uncomfortable as she was. Poor little Apple Bloom was crouched underneath Twilight, trying to hide from all of the attention.
"ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!" bellowed a voice from the upstairs balcony. At the sound of the voice, Everyone immediately ceased in their unending commentary and turned to the source of the voice, much to the ponies relief. Twilight looked in the direction of the voice, and saw a small man, probably in his late seventies, standing on the railing of the upstairs balcony with his arms crossed, starring down upon the guild members with beady, gray eyes. Judging by the newcomer's firm and commanding gaze the elder shot everyone, not to mention the guild's reaction to him, Twilight assumed that the small, ancient man on the balcony was none other then Master Makarov; master of the Fairy Tail guild and the one who Lucy spoke very highly of on their journey to Magnolia. The unicorn could feel the Master's eyes gaze upon all of his 'children' observingly, before finally resting his gaze on herself and the three other ponies. What was even more strange and nerve-wracking though, was the fact that his tired eyes seemed to square in on her more than her fellow equines.
Twilight gulped. And she thought the sudden attention from the rest of the guild was uncomfortable enough, but to her, it felt like this man's judging stare was more intense and powerful then any of the other looks she had received that day. Finally, after what felt like years, Makarov spoke, a calm authority and aurora surrounding his words, "Everyone, return back to your previous activities. I must have a word with our....guests in private," he spoke. Almost immediately, the people surrounding the ponies dispersed, some grumbling and pouting at their master's order, but did as told anyway. Twilight, along with the other ponies, didn't know wether to feel relieved or even more nervous. Sure, the suffocating attention from the guild members was finally over, but now they were going to meet the man who was in charge of the entire place, and that somehow made the four ponies even more apprehensive then they already were. Makarov motioned with his index finger towards the ponies, signaling them to follow him to his office.
Hesitantly, Twilight, Flash, Rainbow Dash, and Apple Bloom obliged and followed the short male up the flight of stairs to the second floor, close behind the man as he made his way to a door, which Twilight assumed was his office. Once the four ponies were piled into the room they sat in the four chairs that faced Makarov's desk, where he sat as he folded his fingers together. The man took another moment to stare curiously at the equines, before he finally broke out into a warm smile, "I see the guild has taken a liking to you four. I wouldn't be surprised; those brats have a knack for getting over excited!" He chuckled softly at his 'children's' antics, but he stopped once he saw the apprehensive looked the ponies were giving him. The Master quickly realized that they were nervous of what he wanted to do with them. Makarov sighed, "No need to feel so troublesome, young ponies from Equestria. I will not do anything that makes you uncomfortable," he assured. A moment of silence.....
"YOU KNOW ABOUT EQUESTRIA!!??" Rainbow Dash and Twilight shouted in unison, jumping slightly in their seats as they looked at the old man in astonishment. Right as they yelled that, the door to the office swung open with a large bang, as Natsu, Lucy, Happy, Erza, and Gray pratically toppled into the room, catching the attention of the ponies and master immediately.
The group of teens sloppily stumbled up to their feet. Once they were settled, Natsu bellowed, "ALRIGHT, I'VE WAITED LONG ENOUGH!!! I WANNA KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE, WHY YOU GUYS ARE HERE, AND WHAT GRAMPS IS TALKING ABOUT, NOW-" Natsu however, was hit hard on the top of the head by Erza, who had an agitated expression with a dark aurora surrounding her. Within moments, Natsu's salmon hair had a large bruise visible for all to see.
"Shut it, and let them explain," the red-head commanded in a terrifyingly calm tone. Everyone in the room shuddered at the woman's scariness and were glad her anger was not directed to them.
"Idiot," Grey snickered.
"Alright-" Erza turned to the ponies, a stern look on her face, "Explain yourselves. What are animals such as yourselves doing here in Fiore? Surely this is not your homeland," Erza spoke, her question directed to the equines.
Rainbow Dash gawked, "Hey! Who are ya calling animals, Red?" the sky-blue pegasus challenged, unfazed by the shock reactions Natsu, Grey, Lucy, and Happy gave her, while Erza starred blankly at the pony, unaffected by the nickname she gave her.
"Uh....Rainbow Dash? You remember when I told you about Erza on our way here?" Lucy nervously questioned.
Rainbow nodded, "Yeah. You said she used magic that manipulated weapons and that she was super scary. So?"
Happy answered this time, sweating as he pointed to the red-head, "Well, uh....you see....that's....Erza," he said hesitantly.
Rainbow Dash raised a brow in confusion, before the realization crossed her face as her eyes grew to the size as plates. She looked back at the re-quip mage, smiled nervously, and took a step back as she rubbed the back of her neck, "He, he, he.....oops...." was her only reply.
Erza smiled softly, before regaining her stern gaze once again, "Forgive me for my choice of words. I should have known better, and where you all come from I should have known your kind aren't classified as animals. However, I do believe that we deserve an explanation as to why you four are here," the mighty Titania reasoned in a business tone.
"It's a bit of a long story," Flash chinned in, his voice just as stern as Erza's, "It may take a bit of explaining," he continued.
"We've got time," Grey said nonchalantly, leaning against the wall.
"Yeah, and besides. You owe us big time since we explained everything to you about Fairy Tail, now it's your turn. Come on, spill it," Natsu smirked deviously as he rubbed the palms of his hands together as if he were planning something.
Finally, twilight stepped up, but before she could get a word out, Apple Bloom's small voice beat her to it, "It's all my fault...." she mumbled, yet everyone heard her.
"Huh?" everyone said, dumbfounded. Twilight made eye contact with the little filly, so she saw the clear guilt in her red eyes, and knew that Apple Bloom wanted to tell the wizards, so she remained silent.
"Ya'll are all right. We don't come from Flori...Fiari...this world. We come from a place called Equestria, which is what I'm told is called another...um..." Apple Bloom stumbled with her words.
"Dimension?" Twilight offered, rapping her front hoof around Apple Bloom's small frame encouragingly. Apple Bloom nodded, grateful for the unicorn's help.
"So anyway, I was helping out Zecora and...." with that, the Cutie Mark Crusader explained everything from Twilight and her going to Canterlot, to seeing Rainbow Dash, meeting Flash Sentry, finding the gem that sent them to Fiore in the first place, running away from the outraged citizens of Hargeon, meeting Natsu and Lucy, and their rescue mission for Flash. The fairies listened intently, considering the filly's words carefully as she went on. Natsu, however, only looked at the filly's face. He could see all of the emotions welling up in her eyes, especially the guilt she still felt when she mentioned the gem and on how she was the one that sent them all here. The dragon slayer felt sympathy for the little pony, but at the same time, he was glad she found that gem and sent herself and the others to Fiore. It was because of that gem that they all met, and therefore the reason why they all became friends. Of course, Natsu would never admit that out loud. By the time Apple Bloom was done, her voice cracked with emotion, ".....I'm sorry...I didn't mean to mess everything up...I just..just....." Twilight hugged and shushed her as Apple Bloom broke down in tears, smoothing out her red mane and whispering comforting words to the filly.
Everyone else simply starred down at the mare and filly with saddened expressions, especially the wizards. The Fairy Tail mages could all see the guilt and grief consuming the pony, as well as the sadness in the three other ponies worried eyes. These four equines have been separated from their home, their families, their friends. They were in a strange land where people looked at them as if they were monsters, and have been treated like dirt the moment they stepped foot in the land. Lucy crouched at eye level with the ponies and scooped up Apple Bloom from Twilight's grasp. The filly was still whimpering and buried her face in the celestial mage's shoulder, "I'm going to take Apple Bloom outside and try to calm her down, " Lucy whispered quietly as she walked out of the room, holding the crusader close for comfort.
A moment on silence soon followed. Twilight grimly realized there have been too many of those today, "I understand it's all hard to take in-" she started, "-but it's the truth. We come from a world of magic just like you, but with different inhabitance and different values," Twilight concluded. Grey shook his head to clear it of all the questions the were circling around his mind.
"Okay, let me get this straight; you guys come from a would called Equestria where there are magical, flying, talking horses, and you were transported here by some kind of gem and have no idea how to get back?" the ice wizard summarized, incredulously.
Rainbow shrugged, "Yeah, pretty much,"
Erza spoke up next, "And you say that there was a dark mage called Fumio who tried to frame you for stealing Hargeon's magic supply and somehow escaped when the guard captain became possessed by a spell?"
"That would be how it played out," Flash answered. the Canterlot Guard could hardly believe all of this himself, and he was there.
"Well, it seems your dilemma is very serious, and I can assure you that Fairy Tail will do all we can to get you four ponies back to Equestria," the Master assured. Twilight smiled gratefully at the man.
"Thank you, Master Makarov. We appreciate the help, but I believe there was a reason why we were brought here," Twilight said. Makarov raised a gray eyebrow curiously.
"And what may that be, child?" the old man asked.
"I believe that it is my comrades and I's duty to stay in this world for a while and help with the issue of the disappearance of magic and to stop Fumio at whatever it is he or anyone else is plotting. I understand this is out of the blue, but let me explain. Natsu, Lucy, and Happy saved us quite a bit when we came to this world, and I think that the other ponies and I owe it to them and you for aiding us in this strange world. It's only fair that we repay the favor," Twilight finished, looking over to Rainbow Dash and Flash Sentry, who nodded, showing that they too agreed with her.
Natsu smiled goofily while Erza, Happy, and Grey grinned affectionately at the mare's words. If there was one thing they could all agree on, is that the ponies were definitely special and that they make proud additions to the guild. That gave Natsu an idea as he sprang up from his position and slung his arms around all three of the ponies, catching them by surprise, "Hey, Gramps! How 'bout they join the guild?" the fire mage suggested cheerily. Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Flash were shocked by the boy's question, yet flattered. It made them, including Flash Sentry, quite pleased that Natsu wanted them to join the guild, but there was one major flaw.
"Uh, that would be great Natsu, but...." Rainbow Dash trailed off, feeling very awkward.
"We aren't wizards. Perhaps Twilight may be able to join your guild, but Rainbow Dash, Apple Bloom, and I don't have magical abilities. Therefore, we won't be able to join," Flash finished, trying to hide the disappointment in his voice. Natsu rolled his eyes.
"Oh, come on! Now that's a load of bull crap! I can sense the magic practically oozing outta ya! You've got magic, you can learn it," Natsu countered, not satisfied with their answer.
"But that's impossible!" Flash shot back.
"Yeah, we're not unicorns or wizards, so there's no way we can learn magic!" Dash added, trying not to get her hopes up too high.
"On the contrary, Natsu may be right. I could sense levels of magic coming off of all of you when you came into the guild. I know this is news to you, but there are many individuals that live their entire lives without realizing that they may have a source of magic within themselves. The same goes for you, Rainbow Dash and Flash Sentry. Even young Apple Bloom has some magic that has resided within her. Yes, you may not be unicorns or wizards, but you come from a world of great magic power, so that alone makes you magical beings," Makarov explained. The two pegasi looked at him in shock.
"So, we can learn magic?" Rainbow Dash asked hesitantly.
"Any kind we wish?" Flash continued, fascinated by the idea of wielding magic of his own.
Makarov nodded, "That is, if you would like to learn it. The decision is completely up to you," Makarov concluded.
Rainbow Dash shot up from Natsu's grasp and flew above him, punching her hooves into the air, "HECK YES!!! Of course we want to learn it! That would be 20% cooler then just seeing it! Imagine all the super awesome magics I could do! Wouldn't that be great Twilight?"
"That would be useful, and I could learn a few more defense spells. What do you think, Flash?" Twilight turned to the said stallion, as everyone awaited his reply. At last, he sighed in defeat.
"I suppose it is a wise idea to learn magic. However, I will only use magic that involves weaponry, otherwise I refuse to participate," the guard answered stubbornly, oblivious to the twinkle in Erza's eyes as she approached him.
"I believe I can help you with that, Flash Sentry. I happen to be a re-quip mage, so I specialize in armor and weaponry magic. I think this magic is perfect for you! You can use magic, yet still maintain your weapon skills. What do you say?" Erza said, excitement overwhelming her at the thought of another re-quip wizard to practice with.
Flash considered the offer for a moment, thinking it over in his head. When he knew his answer, a sly smirk crossed his lips, surprising Twilight, Natsu, and Dash at the fact that the stern and expressionless stallion actually smirked, "I suppose that could work quite well," he responded. Erza's smile broadened at his reply. As for Natsu, Grey, and Happy, they only grimaced.
"Great, another Erza," Happy sighed solemnly. Natsu turned to Twilight with hopeful eyes.
"So, does this mean you guys are joining Fairy Tail?" he asked. Twilight looked to her two other pony companions and saw them nod, giving her their answers.
"Yes, I guess it wouldn't hurt to join Fairy Tail," Twilight replied simply, smiling happily.
"YASH!!! Let's go tell everyone!" Natsu whooped as he threw his arms up in the air and dashed out of the office, Rainbow Dash and Happy flying not far behind.
"Race ya!" Rainbow challenged Happy, who smiled joyfully.
"Your on!!!" the blue exceed accepted, flying beside the pegasus as they disappeared from view.
"Well, better go tell Mira. She'll want to throw a party for you guys," Grey said with a smile, with his shirt gone and his hands in his pockets as he too left the office.
"Come, Flash Sentry. Why don't we discuss the different armors for re-quipping," Erza reasoned, to which the stallion nodded and followed her out as well.
Now, Twilight and her new master were the only ones left in the room. There was a question nagging at Twilight that she couldn't help but ask, and with it just being her and Makarov as the only ones around, it was the perfect time to bring it up, "Master, How did you know that my friends and I were from Equestria? You know, before Natsu and the others burst in," Twilight asked, having remembered the Master comment on the ponies homeland before Team Natsu came stumbling into the office. Makarov sighed.
"I'm afraid it is not the time for that, Twilight Sparkle. Let's just say I have some....history with that area, but I do not believe I am the person to tell you," Makarov answered truthfully.
Twilight nodded, disappointed and uncertain, "I understand Master," was her only reply. As Twilight walked to the door, Makarov called back to her. When Twilight turned around, she saw the small wizard give her a warm smile.
"Welcome to Fairy Tail, my child," Makarov said, affection and tenderness in his tone.
Twilight returned the smile, "Thank you, Master," she replied, before trotting out of the office to greet her new guild mates. |
Fairy Tail: Magic's Fire | Find Your Magic! Part 1 | Natsu: Previously, on "Magic's Fire"..............
Rainbow Dash: Things are getting 20% more awesome now! We've finally gotten away from that crazy Fumio guy and now we're apart of Fairy Tail!
Natsu: I know right!? This is gonna be so awesome!!!
Happy: Aye sir!
Flash: Remind me again why we're here.....
Rainbow Dash: Well, duh! So that we can learn awesome magics and beat the snot outta bad guys!!!!
Natsu: Couldn't have said any better myself! By the way, I DEMAND A REMATCH RAINBOW CRASH!!!! COME ON, YOU AND ME!!!!! LET'S GO!!!!!!!!
Rainbow Dash: OH, I KNOW YOU DIDN'T JUST CALL ME THAT!!!! YOUR ON PINKY!!!!!!!!
Happy: Huh, I swear those two are the same person/pony in different bodies.......
Flash: I definitely agree with you there. Look, it's entertaining and all to see those two go at it, but could we just get on with the chapter?
Happy: Aye sir!
******************************************************************************************************************
Twilight sighed contently as she sat at the bar with Apple Bloom, talking with Lucy and Levy, who the unicorn found out was a bookworm just like herself and a solid-script mage. It was the day after she and her Equestrian comrades first joined Fairy Tail and she already loved it there. Everyone was so welcoming and kind, if not crazy and rambunctious at the same time. Twilight grinned when she remembered the party they had the previous night. It was so exciting that the celebration reminded Twilight of a certain hyperactive, pink, party earth pony who's parties were sometimes just as, if not more crazy than the one from last night. Twilight looked around the guild and spotted Rainbow Dash pinning her head against Natsu and Grey's own heads as the three stared intensely at one another, and Flash who was in a deep conversation with Erza, who was eating a strawberry cake.
Twilight looked down at the area between her right shoulder and her front leg and smiled fondly. Quickly after they announced that they were joining the guild, the white-haired barmaid called Mira had stamped on the insignia Twilight had seen on Natsu and Lucy upon herself, Ranbow, Apple Bloom, and Flash where they asked for the tattoos to be placed. Twilight's guild Mark was multi-colored that matched her main and coat colors almost perfectly; it started with a light pink at the muzzle of the insignia, then went to purple in the middle, and ended at the top with a deep blue. (A/N: Basically it's the Fairy Tail sign on the story cover)
Rainbow Dash had gotten her guild mark in the center of her chest, just below her head. It was also multi-colored, matching her rainbow mane and tail. Flash's guild mark was place on his left cheek, just below his eye, the color a deep blue that matched his eyes. As for little Apple Bloom, she had taken a liking to Lucy, and wanted to be like her, so she had her guild mark located on her lower right front hoof, but in the color of red. For a while, the ponies were faced with the issue of where they were going to stay. They considered Fairy Hills, but decided against it considering on how they had no money and that it would take a while for them to earn enough from job requests to be able to pay.
Fortunately, both Natsu and Lucy were generous enough to offer them refuge in their own homes. Flash Sentry and Rainbow Dash however, decided to stay in the clouds and live there for the time being, seeing as they lived in cloud houses back in Equestria. Imagine the guild's surprise when they saw the clouds outside of the guild hall maneuvered and shaped as fluffy houses! Twilight had agreed to stay with Natsu and Happy while Apple Bloom insisted on being left with Lucy, which Twilight agreed to. However, despite their sleeping arrangements, Twilight ended up sleeping over at Lucy's the previous night. She had woken up to the noises of someone moving around Natsu's house to find said boy leaving threw his window with the blue exceed close behind.
Curious as to what the two were up to, the Element of Magic followed them all the way to Lucy's apartment. Normally, Twilight wouldn't follow someone in the middle of the night like a stalker, that was more on Juvia's part, but she was too tired to really care. When she heard the flustered, yet angered shout of the celestial wizard, Twilight knew she had to step in. Unlike Natsu and Happy, who came in through the window, Twilight politely knocked on the door and was met with an angered, exhausted glare by the blond. Behind her sat a grumpy dragon slayer and cat with two large, comical looking bumps sticking out from their heads, obviously from Lucy punching them hard. Through it all, Apple Bloom sat and watched, holding back her giggles at the silly display. Later, Twilight found out that it was actually very common for Natsu and Happy to break into her house, which wasn't that surprising in Twilight's opinion. The unicorn had only known the two trouble makers for a short amount of time and yet she already expected something like that from them.
"So, when are you planning on taking job requests, Twilight?" Mira asked cheerily from across the bar counter. She handed the said unicorn her drink and smiled warmly at the unicorn. Twilight took the beverage gratuitously and took a sip.
"I honestly don't know. I mean, first we have to find magic abilities that work well for us and then train. I just hope we'll be able to figure it all out soon, especially with the whole magic situation and all," the pony answered honestly. Lucy, Levi, and Mira nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, not to mention we'll need to find a way to get you guys back to Equestria," Lucy added. Ever since she found out about Equestria, the celestial mage has been eager to ask the ponies questions about it nonstop. She was fascinated when the ponies, mainly Twilight, explained their lifestyles and cultures, especially when she heard about the two sisters that ruled Equestria, raising the sun and moon as their sole duties. Levi had also been entranced by Equestrian life, gluing her to her barstool as she listened to Twilight share her knowledge of her homeland.
"That is true, but first the others and I want to help in any way we can to stop this magic issue. Right, Apple Bloom?" Twilight asked.
"Ya know it! Ay can't wait to get started in learning magic! Maybe I'll get my cutie mark by learning magic!" the filly exclaimed eagerly.
Levi raised an eyebrow, "What's a cutie mark?" she asked curiously.
"Cutie marks are those tattoos you see on our flanks. You see, a cutie mark represents a pony's destiny. For example, let's say your destiny involves music, so it's very likely that your cutie mark will be an instrument. My destiny involves magic, that's why my cutie mark is a magic spark. Rainbow's destiny is flying at top speeds, sometimes so strongly to the point of breaking the sound bearer. Flash's destiny is to be a loyal, royal guard. That's why his cutie mark is a shield with a lightning bolt," Twilight explained. Lucy, Levi, and Mira, who apparently overheard their conversation, stared in awe at the new information. Now it made sense why Apple Bloom was so eager to get her cutie mark.
"So your not born with a cutie mark?" Levi asked.
"Nope. It's up to the ponies themselves to find their destiny. Most ponies get theirs when their colts and fillies, though. As a matter of fact, it was all thanks to Rainbow Dash that my other friends and I even got our cutie marks," Twilight smiled fondly at the memory.
"Really? How?" Mira asked.
"It's a long story. I'll tell you later," Twilight assured.
Lucy looked down at the filly who sat in her lap, "So that's why you keep on talking about getting one. It's very important to you, huh?
Apple Bloom nodded, "Yeah. My friends Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle and I don't have our cutie marks yet, so we made a club called the "Cutie Mark Crusaders', where we get together and try to earn our cutie marks!"
Lucy giggled at the filly's adorableness, "That is so cute! Don't worry. I'm sure you'll get your cutie mark eventually,"
"I sure hope so," Apple Bloom agreed.
A sudden shout from the Master rung out through the guild hall, causing everybody and pony to turn to the balcony where they saw Master Macarov stand firmly on the ledge, a grave look on his aged face, "I just received urgent news from the Blue Pegasus guild. Their town's magic is disappearing," the elder deadpanned, arousing shocked and horrified gasps around the hall. Natsu felt his jaw clench and his hands ball into tight fists.
"What do you mean it's disappearing?"
"Do they know who's responsible?"
"You think Magnolia's next?"
The questions swirled around the room, yet no one answered any of them. However, one question was asked that silenced everyone, "Does the Magic Council know about this? Do they want us to find whoever is responsible?"
Everyone looked back at the Master, awaiting his reply, "The Magic Council hasn't responded to any of the issues involving the magic depleting," he answered bluntly, yet with a slight hint of anger in his tone.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEIR NOT RESPONDING!? THIER THE FREAKING COUNCIL!!! THIER SUPPOSED TO DEAL WITH THESE KIND OF THINGS!!!!" Natsu exploded, boiling rage and fury lacing every word he spoke. Wisps of flames danced on his arms, signifying his anger. Everyone took a step back, not wanting to get burned by accident from the fire mage.
"I agree with you, Natsu. However, it is not my say of what they consider important, so calm down," Macarov reasoned sternly, to which Natsu did as told. His flames died down until they were completely gone from his arms, much to his guild mates relief. The last thing they needed was the whole guild on fire.
"With that said, since the council isn't aiding in this situation, it is up to us to protect our city and to find the real culprit. And as you all know, we have gained four unique members of our guild, and they have agreed to help our world in this rising threat," at that, everyone cheered for the ponies, making Twilight, Rainbow, and Apple Bloom blush shyly, while Flash only nodded in agreement, looking rather indifferent.
Once the cheers died down, the Master continued, "However, they must learn magic in order to do their part, so it is up to us, their fellow guild mates, to teach them as much magic ability as we can. Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Flash Sentry, and Apple Bloom, you will all train for the time being before you take any jobs. I have asked mages who I believe you will all benefit from to train you and get you all adapted to our world's magic power. Will this be acceptable for you?" Macarov glanced at the said ponies, waiting for their approval.
Twilight stepped off her barstool and nodded, "We accept your arrangement, Master," she replied respectfully.
"I'm ready! I can't wait to get started!" Apple Bloom proclaimed, her red eyes shining in excitement.
"I'm in! Just as long as I get to pound faces into the ground while I'm at it!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed proudly.
"She said that like a real MAN!!!" Elfman whooped, making Lisanna sweat drop.
Everyone turned to the only one who didn't reply yet, eagerly awaiting his answer. Flash frowned, not liking the sudden attention and turned to Erza, who nodded. The Pegasus sighed, "As long as I still get to use my weapons I accept your terms," he answered in a bored tone, yet he couldn't help but feel a little excited himself at the thought of learning re-quip magic.
Macarov nodded, " Very well. You will all start this afternoon and I expect all the wizards I have chosen to be there as well. No excuses,"
Once he was done, everyone went back to their previous activities, some discussing the Magic Council in the process. Rainbow Dash went up to Natsu, who was no longer filled with intense rage, "Hey Pinky, what's the Magic Council?" She asked.
The dragon slayer shrugged, "Basically it's the system that monitors the magic in this world. It's in charge of all the wizard guilds in Fiore. I can't believe their not doing anything about what's going on! Something's up and I'm not liking it," he said in a suspicious tone.
Rainbow just shrugged, "Or maybe their just being jerks about it or getting lazy. It doesn't matter. We can handle this stuff on our own just fine!" she said with resolve before flying off. Natsu, who would usually agree wholeheartedly, felt that this was a different case. He wouldn't say it out loud, but he suddenly felt this overwhelming sensation of foreboding. Something was not right, that much he was certain.
Afternoon came quickly as the ponies went outside and walked to the back of the guild, where they could practice without disturbing the townsfolk. The wizards who would be training them followed behind. They were Natsu, Lucy, Grey, Erza, Laxus, Gajeel, Levi, Cana, and Wendy. Before she walked out, Wendy turned back to see Carla flying in one place, a concerned look on her face.
"Hey Carla, are you okay?" the petite dragon slayer asked her friend.
The exceed snapped out of her reverie by the girl's voice, "What? Oh, uh...y-yes, I'm fine. Just....thinking," she answered unconvincingly. The truth was that Carla was just thinking of the ponies. Though she wasn't completely sure, Carla could have sworn the the equines were the exact same ones from her last vision, but she wasn't too sure just yet. The she-cat would just have keep an eye on the ponies and stay alert for anything strange.
Once everyone was assembled outside behind the guild, the selective wizards chosen to assist the ponies stood in front of the four equines, a strong sense of magic power gathering up around them. It was Laxus who spoke first, "Okay, so here's how it's gonna go down: each of you are gonna display the abilities you can perform, and we will compare those abilities with our own to decide which magic will benefit you all the most. Deal?" he asked, a hard and commanding glare adorning his face. The ponies simply nodded in response. Laxus turned away afterwards, grumbling lowly in an annoyed tone. Rainbow Dash leaned over to Twilight, positioning her hoof on the side of her face so that no one else could hear.
"Is it just me, or does that Laxus guy seem like a human version of Flash?" the rainbow-maned Pegasus asked.
"What do you mean?" Twilight inquired, unsure of where her companion was going with this.
"You know! Cold glare, arrogant, attitude, and acting as if he's all that?" Rainbow insisted.
"You know I can hear you, right?" an annoyed male voice deadpanned, obviously belonging to the stallion who was in fact right beside Rainbow Dash. The sky-blue mare turned to him, her expression blank.
"Hey, all I'm saying is that you and Laxus could really be twins if not for the fact that you two are from completely different dimensions," Rainbow Dash reasoned nonchalantly, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Before Flash Sentry could retort, a dark shadow came over them, sending chills down the two equines spines and nearly making their wings flare up in fear. Erza stood behind them, her height making it feel as though she were a wolf, and the two pegasi were the rabbits she was going to eat for dinner. Twilight, Natsu, and their fellow guild mates were just thankful that they weren't the source of the re-quip mage's rage.
"Flash. Rainbow. Silence yourselves before I do so for you," the red-head said in a dangerously low tone of voice. Rainbow Dash shivered, while Flash gulped, failing to keep the sweat from flowing down his neck.
"Y-yes, m-mam," they both stuttered in unison, their voices cracking from the fear they felt.
And as quickly as it came, Erza's terrifying glare evaporated from her features, being replaced with an approving grin and nod before she sauntered back over to the rest of her guild mates. Everybody and pony let out breaths they didn't even realize they were holding in.
"Well then, let's get started!" Erza announced, determination and authority laced within her tone.
***************************************************************************************************************
By the time the sun was beginning to sink into the horizon, everyone who was outside became fatigued from all the magic they had exerted. Fortunately, they were able to cover plenty of ground in the past hours. Twilight had learned many different spells thanks to the numerous spell books Levi had brought out for her. She had even learned a few moves from Natsu and Grey, who didn't end up fighting each other for once. Flash Sentry trained with Erza, who taught him the basics of re-quipping such as summoning a weapon, and they practiced sparring for the rest of the day. Rainbow Dash became a quick prodigy with lighting magic, which she learned from Laxus. Since Rainbow was a weather Pegasus back in Equestria, the skill came naturally to her and she decided to specialize in weather magic, specifically lightning.
Unfortunately, despite all the progress the three equines had made, there was one of them that wasn't having such luck. Apple Bloom had tried everything, but alas, was not able to find the magic ability that was for her; she had tried everything from cards magic with Cana to sky magic with Wendy, yet nothing seemed to work. Apple Bloom was understandably upset and decided to throw in the towel as she sat underneath a nearby tree and watched enviously as the older ponies found their magic skills no problem, while she sulked and felt miserable. She must have been off in her own world, because the little filly didn't notice the youngest dragon slayer walk up beside her until she felt a delicate tap on her shoulder which aroused her from her daze. The Cutie Mark Crusader looked up to be met with the kind, brown eyes of Wendy, who smiled warmly at her. Apple Bloom returned the smile, albeit more sadly than cheerfully.
Wendy noticed the young pony's sorrowful demeanor immediately, and sat beside the young filly underneath the tree that swayed gently in the breeze. The two girls didn't say anything for a few moments, just sitting and watching their guild mates prepare to return to the guild hall. Finally, it was Wendy who cut through the silence, "Some day, huh? I don't think I've ever seen the guild so excited to train," Wendy spoke. Apple Bloom nodded, though it seemed that her mind was elsewhere. Wendy frowned.
"You know, there's still a bunch of magic abilities in the guild that we can try! I just know there's one that will be perfect for you!" the young girl said enthusiastically, trying to cheer up the crusader beside her. Another moment of silence dragged on, and Wendy thought that Apple Bloom wanted to be alone, but as she moved to get up, a small voice stopped her.
"Do you think I'll ever find it?" Apple Bloom asked in a whisper so small, Wendy almost missed it even with her enhanced senses.
"Find what?" the Sky Dragon Slayer asked curiously.
"Find the magic that's meant for me. I can't do any magic that anyone tries to teach me....not even yours," Apple Bloom said, looking at Wendy with sorrowful red eyes. Wendy was about to say something, but Apple Bloom wasn't done, "I just can't seem to do any type of ability like the rest of you! Rainbow Dash was able to learn lighting and weather magic, Flash Sentry was sparring with Erza and re-equipping no problem, and Twilight has already mastered her own magic techniques and is just learning some new spells! And what about me? Nothing!" the little pony cried, her voice raising enough to cause a few heads to turn their way, including Natsu and Twilight. Wendy, not knowing what else to do, sat with the young filly and hugged her, trying to sooth her with encouraging words.
"I'm sorry that I can't help you with learning magic, Apple Bloom, but don't give up just yet! Grandina, the dragon who raised me, always said that every living soul has some kind of magic power that is destined for them, even if they can't find it at first," Wendy explained reassuringly. At the girl's words, Apple Bloom calmed down, yet snuggled closer to her new friend as she looked up at her with teary, red eyes.
"R-really....?" the pony stuttered out, clinging on to hope. Wendy smiled and nodded.
"Really. You just haven't found that magic that's destined for you, but I know you'll find it. Believe it or not, there are two types of magics out there, like ability-type magic and holder-type magic. Ability magic is the magic that comes directly from within us and we can control it to our will, but holder magic is magic where you can learn any type of power you want and use it to your advantage. There are always going to be all kinds of magical abilities out there, you just need to uncover yours. And don't worry, if there's one thing Fairy Tail has taught me, it's that we will always be with you every step you take, so don't worry. With us you'll find your magic ability for sure!" Wendy conclude, striking a thumbs up to emphasize her encouragement.
Apple Bloom smiled a genuine smile this time and wiped the tears away and hugged Wendy, "Thanks, Wendy. I appreciate that, and I know I'll find out what it is my magic is suppose to be, just as I'll find out what my cutie mark is as well! I got to go, I'm gonna go find my special ability! Bye, Wendy!" and with that, the bow-wearing filly dashed off, ready to go and find the magic she was destined to train with. Wendy smiled and waved cheerily to Apple Bloom, before the sound of a throat being cleared made her turn her head to be met with the smiling and touched faces of her guild mates, humans, exceeds, and ponies. Even Gajeel held a small smirk as he looked at the Sky Dragon Slayer.
"W-what?" Wendy stuttered self-consciously. She had no idea they had an audience.
Erza smiled, "You are truly wise beyond your years, Wendy," was all the great Titania said, which made everybody and pony else nod their heads in agreement.
Wendy blushed.
****************************************************************************************************************
Apple Bloom dashed off as fast as her little legs could take her, scouring the town and looking at any shops that held magical items. Apple Bloom knew that, being an earth pony, that she was likely more equipped for having holder-type magic, considering on how all the earth ponies back in Equestria usually never manifested magic power unless they came into contact with some sort of magical property. Apple Bloom knew Wendy was right; there was some type of magical ability that was meant for her, and she was determined to find it. Anything to be able to help her new guild in the crisis their world was in. The young filly shivered at the thought of what Master Macarov announced to the entire guild earlier that day, and it angered her that the Magic Council wasn't doing anything about it. All the more reason to find a magic she was capable of as soon as possible. The faster she found her magical ability, the faster she could be of more help to her friends. No matter the costs.
To be continued...... |
My Little Pony: Friendship is Mandatory | pre | "For the last time, my name is Golden Harvest," the mare stated as she handed over the saddle.
"It's called a playful nickname darling," Rarity explained, "Don't be so dramatic."
"Wouldn't be considered playful if we enjoyed it equally?" Golden Harvest asked, "Because otherwise, it sounds less like a nickname and more like an insult."
"...Just...go back to work," Rarity ordered.
"Yes ma'am," Golden Harvest said dejectedly. Rarity then put the saddle over Twilight and began to strap it.
"Let me know when this gets too tight darling," she explained.
"Oh, I'm sure it won't be-TOO TIGHT!" Twilight squeaked as Rarity forcefully fastened the straps. Almost instantaneously, she let loose the strap.
"Really?!" Rarity asked incredulously, "But this was a large! Hm...Have you ever considered going on a diet?"
"My mom says that my body is already perfect the way it is," Twilight said sheepishly.
"Yes, my mum says the same thing," Rarity then leaned closer to whisper, "But between you and me, her body isn't exactly the temple she thinks it is."
"Ok! Well, it was very nice to meet you," Twilight said with false politeness, "But me and Spike rrreeeaaallllllyyy need to get going."
Twilight then took off the saddle and politely handed it back to Rarity, but the business mare handed it right back.
"No darling, I insist that you keep it," she said, "After all, that is what friends do for each other."
Twilight soon jolted as her willingness to leave slightly disappeared.
"You want to be my friend?" she asked, "Like...willingly?"
"But of course," Rarity said as if it was fact, "What other reason would I want to be friends with you?"
"To get something out of it?"
Rarity gasped out of shock.
"I would never!"
"Yes she would."
"Would you like to go back to earning next to nothing selling carrots?"
"...No."
"Then quiet you," Rarity faced Twilight with a smile, "I assure you, darling, there is nothing I want from you other than friendship. I mean, sure it would be beneficial for you to go back to Canterlot and tell the rich ponies there about my work, but I assure you that the thought hasn't even crossed my mind once...until now."
Twilight was torn. On the one hoof, she didn't think she would want to be friends with a pony like Rarity. On the other hoof, new friend!
"Ok..." she said unsurely, "Well, Spike and I really do have to go. So it was nice meeting you...sort of. Come on Spike."
Twilight levitated Spike in her aura and the two of them finally began to leave the store.
"Bye pretty pony!" Spike said dully.
"She's perfect," Spike sighed as leaned back on Twilight. The two of them were walking down a path that was leading them just outside of Ponyville, and the whole time Spike seemed to be stuck in a dreamlike state over their new "friend."
"Spike, you know I would never crush anyone's hopes of love," Twilight told him, "But I got an aching feeling that she wouldn't really be interested in you."
"Why? Because I'm a dragon?" He asked defensively.
"Because you're a kid," Twilight said simply.
"Oh, well that's understandable," Spike said as he relaxed again, "But don't worry about that Twilight. I've got the perfect plan that assures she will fall in love with me."
Before he could even explain his plan, Spike had finally got a sense of his surroundings and straightened up into a sitting position.
"Where are we anyway?" he asked curiously.
"We're heading off to finish the to-do list," Twilight explained as she pulled out the parchment, "You were still daydreaming, so I had to read what was next myself. According to this, a pony named Fluttershy is in charge of handling the music, and we have to check up on her. I asked around, and the ponies said that they've last seen her somewhere around here."
Almost on cue, the two of them began to hear the music of songbirds coming from nearby. As they followed the sound, Spike and Twilight came across a yellow pegasus with a long pink mane and tail. The mare hadn't noticed them yet, as she appeared to be directing a random assortment of birds to sing a song. Or at least she was trying to, as one of the blue jays appeared to be freestyling.
"Um, Mr. Bluejay," the mare said quietly, "I know you like to mix it up a bit, but if it's alright with you, I think it's for the best if we stick to the song I wrote."
Unfortunately for the mare, the bluejay continued to do his own thing.
"Ok, um, that's nice on its own, I guess," said the mare, "But seriously, I need you to follow my directions. Please?"
The bluejay still refused to listen.
"Pretty Please?"
The bluejay was practically mocking the mare with its freestyle.
"Ok, I guess you can just...do whatever," the mare said as she accepted defeat, "It's only the most important celebration of the year. I'm sure nopony would mind your freestyle."
"Um, excuse me."
The mare then turned around at the new voice, to come face to face with a confused Twilight.
"Are you Fluttershy?" she asked nicely.
"Yes. Why?" Fluttershy asked with a tilt to her head, "Did I do something wrong? Oh Celestia, are you here to yell at me for something I did wrong?"
"What? No," Twilight answered, "Me, and my friend Spike here, are just making sure everything is alright for the celebration tonight. According to our to-do list, you're in charge of the music?"
"Yes. I am."
There was a long moment of silence between the three individuals.
"Soooo?" Spike initiated.
"Soooo?" Fluttershy misunderstood.
"Soooo how's it going?" Twilight asked.
"Oh, I'm sorry," Fluttershy apologizes pathetically, "It's actually going really well. All things considered. I guess."
"Well, where are the musicians?" Spike asked, "Shouldn't you be directing them instead of these birds?"
"Actually, the birds are the musicians," Fluttershy explained. Spike and Twilight just stared at her blankly for a while, neither of them not knowing what to say at such a revelation.
"You see, Ponyville doesn't really have that many musicians," Fluttershy continued to explain, "Lyra can play the lyre, but she's shy in front of crowds and Rarity practically owns her now. And we do have Vinyl Scratch, who's also a D.J., but she went to Canterlot for the celebration. Said something about seeing something fling, or something along those lines. I don't know. I don't really poke into other ponies' business.
"Anyway, at the meeting of who does what for the celebration, I said that birds are pretty good singers and that they could probably handle the music for the night. It was meant to be a joke, but unfortunately, ponies have a hard time knowing whether or not I'm joking. Because of this, Mayor Mare took me seriously and told me that I can take care of the music. So ever since sunrise, I've been teaching my birds how to sing in full concierto...and as I've said, it's been going fine...all things considered."
Spike and Twilight just did nothing but stare at Fluttershy, attempting to unpack everything that has been said to them.
"...Have I been talking for too long?" Fluttershy asked, "Because it feels like I've been talking for too long."
"It's not the fact that you've been talking for too long," Spike explained, "It's the fact that what you've just said is the worst case of incompetence that I've heard in my life."
"I'm sorry," Fluttershy apologized, "I know I'm the worst. My rabbit tells me every day."
"Oh! No, you're not the worst," Twilight said, "You just eccen-Wait, did you just say that your rabbit tells you that you're the worst?"
"Yeah, his name's Angel," said Fluttershy, "He's a good bunny, but he gets a little mad that nopony understands him. And also takes that anger out on me because I'm the only one who understands a single word he says."
Once again, Spike and Twilight did nothing but stare at the pony in front of them.
"Seriously, is there some sort of medication you should be on?" Spike asked, "Did you, like, forget to take some this morning?"
"Not really," Fluttershy said, "I should know. I asked several doctors and they said that I'm fully developed mentally."
"Huh," Twilight simply stated, "Well, it was nice meeting you Fluttershy."
"I know it wasn't," Fluttershy said dejectedly, "You don't have to lie me."
"Oh! I'm not lying!" Twilight said too quickly, "It genuinely was nice to meet you."
"...Really?"
"Yeah!"
Fluttershy just stared at Twilight with disbelieve. For a short time, Twilight was beginning to feel uncomfortable with the excessive attention given to her.
"...No one has ever said anything nice to me before," Fluttershy said, "Thank you miss."
"Oh, you don't need to be formal," Twilight explained, "Please, just call me-"
"Twilight!"
Twilight became tense as she recognized that voice. Turning around, she confirmed her excitement when she saw Princess Celestia herself standing behind her.
"Princess!" she said happily, "What are you doing here?"
"Oh no, is this about the colony of ants I squashed?" Fluttershy asked, instantly groveling before the princess, "I'm sorry! I wasn't paying attention, and I accidentally walked into their anthill. Please forgive me. I already made a memorial for them, what more would it take?"
"What? No that's not-I mean," Celestia cleared her throat and smiled kindly at her subject, "There's no need to grovel before me my kind subject. Your sins have already been forgiven."
"Oh thank goodness," Fluttershy sighed with relief.
"As for why I'm here," Princess Celestia then turned to Twilight, "I'm supposed to get ready for the celebration tonight. However, I wanted to check on how my favorite student was taking care of things."
"I'm your favorite student!" Twilight squeed.
"You're her only student," Spike pointed out, but Twilight just ignored him.
"Well, the preparations are going great princess!" Twilight said with a playful salute, "The catering is delicious, the skies are clear, the decorations are lovely, and this pony is teaching birds how to play orchestra music. Isn't that neat?"
"...I'm sorry, but did you just say she's teaching birds how to play orchestra music?" Celestia asked.
"It was meant to be a joke," both Fluttershy and Twilight answered at the same time.
"Well, that is...neat!" Princess Celestia said with her familiar smile.
"Glad to hear it princess!" Twilight said proudly, "It's always a pleasure to-"
"However, if I may criticize," the princess interrupted, "When I asked you to take care of things, I thought you would take care of it no problem. That way you'll have enough time to study to find ways of stopping..." she briefly glanced at Fluttershy before looking back at Twilight, "You-know-who."
"Um...Well I-"
"And I can't help but notice that it's nearly sunset and you haven't done that yet," Princess Celestia continued, "I went to see you at the library, you know, the one I set up for you to spend the night in. I was expecting you to be there, but nopony was home. I asked this pink pony where you were, and she told me that I would find you right here. And here I am seeing that you have just finished organizing the preparations. You didn't get distracted, did you?"
"I..." Twilight turned to look at Fluttershy before facing Princess Celestia again, "Maybe I got a little distracted. But it's fine, right? You did say that you have a plan."
"Oh, of course, I have a plan," the princess said, "It's a perfect plan. Almost without fail. Still, it's for the best you study for alternative ways to stop you-know-who. Better to be safe than sorry, am I right?"
"...Yes princess," Twilight said dejectedly. Spike looked at her with sympathy and glared at the princess as she began to comfort her student condescendingly.
"Don't worry Twilight," she said, "I'm not mad. Just go to the library and finally finish what I asked of you. Because you wouldn't want to disappoint me would you?"
"No princess."
"Good," Celestia then began to walk back to town, "See you at the celebration Twilight! I hope you'll find a solution."
Twilight sighed in defeat as she turned to face Fluttershy.
"Sorry, but we have to go," Twilight said, "It really was nice meeting you. And your birds do sound lovely."
"Oh, thank you," Fluttershy said, her mood visibly increasing. In fact, if she didn't know any better, Fluttershy could that at this moment she felt truly-
"Speaking of, your birds flew away a couple of minutes ago," Twilight said, "Sorry. I should've mentioned it earlier, but your story distracted me."
"Wait, what?" Fluttershy turned around and, sure enough, all the birds she has been directing for the past ten hours were gone.
"Aw man," she said dejectedly, "I don't suppose you want to help me find them?"
Fluttershy looked back at Twilight, but she and Spike were already leaving.
"Oh, that's fine. I guess," Fluttershy called out, "You have better things to do. I completely get it."
Spike and Twilight walked in silence as the two of them walked towards the Golden Oaks Library. According to the directions they've got, it was a big tree near the center of town that built to look like a library. Throughout the whole walk, Twilight just stared ahead with her usual grin practically gone missing. At the moment, Spike felt torn. On the one hand, he was right about staying on task, and he always loved being right. On the other hand, Twilight was practically a sister to him, and he couldn't stand seeing her like this.
"Hey, don't feel too bad," he said nurturing, "Even the best A+ students get an occasional B on their assignments."
"You don't need to cheer me up Spike," Twilight's dejection soon turned into determination, "You were right. I shouldn't have got distracted. From here on out, we're focussing on work."
"You sure?"
"Yep," Twilight said as they walked inside the library, "Besides, I don't see how I can't. There's literally nopony else left for us to meet."
Once she closed the door, Twilight realized that the lights were left off. Before she could even search for a light switch, the lights were instantly turned on revealing a room full of ponies.
"SURPRISE!"
"Sweet Sally!" Twilight exclaimed as she put a hoof to her chest. As for Spike, he immediately fell off of Twilight's back out of pure shock.
"What the hell are all of these ponies doing here?" Spike asked, picking himself off the floor, "I know for a fact that it isn't for learning."
"They're here because I invited them silly!"
The duo once again turned to face a new voice, only to find it belonging to a familiar face.
"Hey, you're-"
"The pony from earlier? I sure am!" The pink mare said chipperly, "My name's Pinkie Pie, and it is very nice to meet you. Sorry that I couldn't introduce myself properly. I knew for a fact that you're new here, so I decided to throw you a 'Welcome to Ponyville' party!"
"A party?" Twilight asked with disbelieve.
"Uh-huh."
"For...me?" Disbelieve soon turned into heartfelt.
"Yeperoonie!" Pinkie confirmed.
"No one has ever thrown me a party before," Twilight said nearly choking up on her word, "Thank you so much."
"Oh it was no problem," Pinkie waved off, "Trust me. Parties are the best way for me to forget."
"What do you mean to forget?" Spike asked.
"Oh not much," Pinkie told him, "I just use parties to forget that our lives are meaningless and that every decision we make has already been predetermined by a cruel god Or. in our case a writer who has a high superiority complex of himself...Anyway, are you hungry? Cause there are cupcakes on the other end."
What might have been the fifth time that day, Twilight and Spike just stared in silence at the mare in front of them
"Wait a minute," Twilight said with a sense of seriousness, "Are you telling me that you brought CUPCAKES!"
"That is not the thing you focus on Twilight!" Spike told his now ecstatic friend. Once again, Twilight chose to ignore him as she walked over to a table chock full of confectionary treats. She gasped once she noticed the flavor of the cupcakes.
"Are those-"
"Red velvet?" Pinkie finished, "They sure are!"
"I love red velvet," Twilight said as she picked up one of the cupcakes, "You see, they-"
"Remind you of your mother Twilight Velvet, who always told you to that great things happen to ponies who follow their dreams," Pinkie finished with a smile. Twilight, on the other hoof, couldn't help but stare.
"How do you know that?"
"Silly filly, I know everything," Pinkie said with a smile, "E V E R Y T H I N G."
"...Oh really?"
"Yep," Pinkie confirmed, "I know the day you were born, the day you'll die, your favorite food, your favorite color, your highest hopes, your worst nightmares, and even your creepiest fetishes!"
"I don't have any fetishes."
"And I knew that!" Pinkie continued, "I also know all of those things that I just mentioned for all of the ponies in this room! Not only that, but I know everything that has and will happen to every pony in Equestria!"
"Well that's...neat," Twilight said with a forced smile.
"Oh, it sure isn't," Pinkie said with laughter, "Trust me, having the knowledge of basically every little thing in the known universe is such God damn torture! Don't let this happy expression fool you. I may act all happy go lucky on the outside. But on the inside. I. Am. Dieing!"
"...Ok then," Twilight said, beginning to feel uncomfortable.
"No need to be uncomfortable," Pinkie told her, "The omnipotent knowledge that I'm cursed with can come in handy in making parties like this. Especially when it comes to making the guest list."
"Why does that-"
"Rainbow Dash reporting for duty!"
Twilight jumped at the familiar voice. She turned around and, sure enough, it was Rainbow Dash standing before her with a salute.
"Oh, hey Rainbow," Twilight said, calming her breath, "When did you get here?"
"An hour ago," Rainbow stated plainly, "Once getting Pinkie's invitation, I have decided to spend the time doing a perimeter search for any threats, as well as giving an ocular pat down to every party guest entering the domain."
"And you've been doing that for an hour?" Twilight asked.
"Yes ma'am," Rainbow confirmed, "It is more efficient that way. Permission to give you my report."
"Sure-I mean-permission granted."
"Yes ma'am," Rainbow dropped her salute, "I am happy to report that there are no threats currently residing in the premises."
"Oh Twilight!"
"Correction," Rainbow continued, "There are currently no threats in the premises that I cannot physically overpower."
Just then, Rarity walked up to the group, sporting her signature false smile.
"Rarity," Twilight said with uncertainty, "You came here too?"
"Of course darling," Rarity waved off Twilights concern, "That's what friends do for each other right? W come to each other's little parties in order to hang out. And we are friends, after all. I mean, why else would I come to this...quaint little establishment with the unsophisticated ponies of Ponyville, if not to spend time with you?"
"I know why!" Pinkie exclaimed, "It's because you're hoping that she'll believe you're friends so she can promote your store in Canterlot."
"No one asked you Pinkie," Rarity said with a glare before facing Twilight with a smile, "Don't listen to her darling. She is, how you say, a little cuckoo bananas."
"Son of a bitch!"
Rarity's mood has once again soured at the sound of the familiar southern drawl. The entire group had turned to see Applejack herself, sauntering over.
"Pinkie, what have Ah told you," She said to the party planner, "If y'all are gonna throw another one of yer random parties, then don't invite me if y'all are gonna invite Rarity. And if ya really have to invite us both, the least you could do is heavily spike the punch."
"Oh I did," Pinkie said as she pointed in the other direction, "The pink punch is full of sugary goodness, and the purple punch is full of the strongest vodka I could find."
"Oh, Ah've just been drinkin' the pink punch," Applejack stated plainly, "My apologies. Now if you don't excuse me-"
"The party has barely started and you're already drinking?" Rarity asked flabbergasted, "Please, for your sake, have some standards. Because it's hardly ladylike to get wasted as much as you do."
Applejack began to stare daggers at the pony of her frustrations.
"Like Ah give a rats ass about what is or isn't ladylike," Applejack said through gritted teeth, "Especially comin' from a bitch like you."
"Well maybe you should," Rarity stated, "After all, you'll find it's a lot easier to find a special somepony if you act more like a lady and less like a country hick."
"Oh and y'all are such the master of love," Applejack said sarcastically, "Name one stallion that ya had a serious relationship with that had lasted more than a week."
"It's called browsing!" Rarity said defensively, "You don't just go dress shopping and expect to pick out the first set of rags you see!"
"Living ponies are not just some objects y'all can buy at the store!"
The two of them continue to go back and forth between each other. Twilight couldn't help but watch as her two new friends were in an intense screaming match.
"Should we do something?" she asked Pinkie.
"Nah, this is normal," Pinkie told Twilight with a smile, "Trust me, after a while, this will be like construction workers doing work outside your home. It's annoying at first, but eventually, your brain will tune it out as background noise."
"Huh," Twilight said as she continued to stare at the fight before her. Soon enough, her attention was drawn away from the two screaming mares, and towards the sounds of exasperated panting. Twilight soon found out that said panting was coming from an exhausted-looking Fluttershy.
"Sorry...I'm...late," she said between gasps of air, "I was...looking for birdseed at my house...to help me find my birds. That's when I...when I found this invitation to your party. So I...I ran over here...as fast as I could."
"You ran?"
"Yes."
"Why didn't you just fly?"
Fluttershy was about to answer, but once the realization hit her, her energy soon sunk further more than it did.
"I'm an idiot."
"You sure are," Pinkie said with a simply.
"That wasn't nice," Twilight said to Pinkie.
"She doesn't mind," Pinkie told her.
"She's right. I don't," Fluttershy sighed.
"Anyways," Pinkie put a hoof around Twilight, "Welcome to Ponyville! And now that all of your friends are here, are you ready to get this party started?"
Twilight was ecstatic. For the first time in her life, she was surrounded by friends at a party meant for her. Sure the guest list was...eccentric, but Twilight didn't mind. She wanted to get to know them better. She wanted to have fun. She-
'You wouldn't want to disappoint me would you?'
-needed to follow orders.
"I...I can't," Twilight reluctantly refused, "I want to! I really want to. But Princess Celestia asked me to do something for her. And I can't let her down."
"Yeah, I know," Pinkie said nonchalantly, "You don't mind if we still party while you work, do you. I put a lot of work into it, and I do not want it all to go to waste."
Twilight forced a smile, trying her best not to let her pain seep through.
"Of course not," she said, "Party as much as you want."
"You bet I will," Pinkie then turned to the crowd behind her, "Alright party ponies! Who's ready to get this party started?"
Twilight heard everypony cheer as she walked away to find an empty room to study. She wished there was a solution where she could both enjoy her party and do what the princess asked. But Twilight didn't have time to feel bad for herself. She had a mission to do, and by Celestia, she will not let her teacher down.
Twilight had let her teacher down.
She had spent the last few hours studying nearly every book she could get her hoofs on in that library. She scanned through books about ancient artifacts to even books about sibling counseling if the moment required it. Despite her best efforts, Twilight had come up with nothing remotely useful for the situation at hoof. Needless to say, she was freaking out as she stood in city hall amongst the ponies of Ponyville, waiting for the celebration to begin.
"Hey there," Pinkie said as she bounced up to Twilight, "How did the studying go? I mean, I know it went bad, but conversations like this are the closest I'll get to being grounded in reality."
"The studying was something to be desired," Twilight said as calmly as she could, "But I'm sure it's fine. It has to fine! Right Spike?"
Twilight turned to face her best friend for moral support. Unfortunately, Spike had currently passed out on her back during the walk over to the city hall.
"Oh right, it's past his bedtime," she said mostly to herself, "Still, it's not the end of the world."
"Not yet it isn't!" Pinkie pointed out.
"Princess Celestia still has a plan," Twilight continued, "She said it herself: It's a plan without fail. I'm sure that everything is going to be just fine."
Meanwhile
Behind the curtain of the main balcony, Raven Inkwell was currently hyperventilating into a paper bag. As for Celestia, she just stood there and watched her with annoyance rather than concern.
"Would you chill the hell out," she ordered, "Everything is going to be fine."
"Everything is not going to be fine!" Raven snapped, "Your sister is going to show up any minute now. And instead of coming up with a plan of your own, you decided to give the work to some random pony."
"Trust me, Twilight will take care of it," Celestia explained, "She may not seem like it, but Twilight Sparkle is one of my smartest students. She once sprouted an entire garden's worth of plants after tinkering around with a simple plant potion."
"And you really think she can find a way to stop Nightmare Moon after just a few hours?" Raven asked skeptically.
"Of course she can," Celestia waved off the concern, "So believe me when I say that nothing bad is going to happen."
As she said that, Princess Celestia then disappeared in a bright flash of blue light.
"...Well shit," Raven said simply.
"Well shit indeed," said a sinister voice that had sent a shiver up Raven's spine.
Back in the main party area
"Yep," Twilight said to herself, "Everything is going to be just fine."
"Dramatic irony at its finest," Pinkie said to no one in particular. Before Twilight could comment, the town's mayor had stepped out to address her citizens.
"Good evening everypony," she said, "I hope you're all enjoying the celebration."
"What's up with apple theme in the buffet table?" asked a random pony.
"Y'all try handling the catering in less than a day!" Applejack defended, "Some of us have to try and make sacrifices."
"...Ok then," the mayor shrugged off, "Anyway, it is now that I would like to introduce the most important pony of the event. A pony who was made important due to the power of the monarchy. Speaking of, this town is now a monarchy. Because democracy is stupid."
"What if we want a new mayor?"
"Then I suggest that you stallions better start putting' a baby in me now," the mayor said simply, "Now without further ado, allow me to present to you all to the pony of the night. Cue the music!"
All eyes turned towards Fluttershy, who just stood alone on her own balcony.
"Um...so here's the thing," she said, "My birds flew away around sunset, and I couldn't find them in time. So I'm just gonna...um..."
Fluttershy then attempted to mimic the sound of a trumpet, as well as mime out playing the imaginary instrument. Everyone just stared at her with a mix of confusion and disappointment.
"...I'm sorry," Fluttershy apologizes pathetically.
"...Freakin' weirdo," the mayor muttered to herself before facing her citizens again, "Anyway. I present to you all: Princess Celestia!"
The mayor gave Rarity the signal, who then promptly pulled the curtain back to present the princess...only the princess wasn't there. Everypony gasped as to what they saw, whereas Rarity just looked at them with confusion.
"What's wrong?" she asked, not noticing the pony behind the curtain, "Is it the design of the ribbons? Heartstrings, I swear to Celestia if you-"
"Swear to me," said a menacing voice. Rarity finally turned the source of the voice, and her heart sank towards her stomach. Standing before her was a mare just as tall as Princess Celestia. Only she donned dark blue armor with a coat that was as dark as the night's sky, and her mane waved with the cosmos themselves. The mare stepped around the cowering fashionista as she addressed the terrified ponies before her.
"Greetings my subjects!" she said, "I'm here to bring bad news and worse news. The bad news is that Princess Celestia is no longer your ruler. The worse news is that your new ruler is me. For I am-"
"Princess Luna!"
The mare's controlled stature soon broke the second she heard that name.
"Who...who said that name?" she asked, "Not to say that is my name. Not even close. For my name is Nightmare Moon! Princess of the eternal night!"
Nightmare Moon looked towards the ponies of Ponyville, only they no longer looked terrified. Instead, they looked confused and a tad bit unimpressed with the self-proclaimed ruler. Nightmare Moon's mood visibly slumped at the sight of this.
"But seriously though," she said, "Who is the insufferable worm that stole my thunder?"
"It was me Princess Luna!"
Nightmare Moon scanned through the audience until finally spotting a lavender coated pony who was waving her hoof furiously.
"You there!" she pointed towards Twilight, "Who are you and how do you know that name that still isn't mine?"
"I'm Twilight Sparkle," Twilight explained, "I know your name because I'm your sister's number one pupil. She's told me a lot about you."
"I don't have a sister!" Nightmare Moon said quickly, "Let it be known that Nightmare Moon is an only child! And those who disagree will...wait a minute."
The malicious monarch then began to glare daggers at Twilight.
"Are you really Celestia's student?" she growled.
"I sure am!" Twilight said proudly. As for the ponies around her, they soon took a few steps away from Twilight so as not to be associated with her.
"Tell me something Twilight Sparkle," Nightmare said, "Did you know that your 'teacher' has banished me to the moon for a thousand years?!"
"I sure did!" Twilight confirmed, "She also said that she had a plan to stop you. But seeing as how you're still here, I assume you both worked things out fairly and peacefully."
Nightmare Moon then smiled evilly.
"I guess you could say something like that," she said, "You see, she banished me to the moon for a thousand years. So I banished her to the moon for a thousand more!"
"Oh," Twilight said meekly, "That doesn't sound nice."
"I don't know, it seems pretty fair to me," Nightmare Moon said, "Especially because that makes me the official ruler of Equestria...So are there any questions about my rule? I'm an evil dictator, but a fair at that."
Surprisingly, only three ponies in the audience raised their hoofs.
"You," she pointed out, "The rainbow maned one. What's your question?"
"Will you allow ponies like me to be a part of your royal guard?" Rainbow asked, "More specifically, will you allow ponies like me to take positions regarding your royal guard's captain."
"What? No." Nightmare Moon said plainly, "You're so tiny, that I could crush you within seconds. I'd imagine it would be quicker for my enemies."
"In that case: DIE FIEND!" Rainbow charged towards Nightmare Moon, screaming an epic war cry. Unfortunately for her, the princess of the night used her magic to hold back Rainbow Dash within seconds before impact. Rainbow kicked and wreathed, but Nightmare's magic wouldn't budge.
"Let it be known that once you let go of me, I introduce you to a world of pain!" Rainbow said threateningly.
"Sure you will tiny," Nightmare said sarcastically, "Are there any other questions? Preferably ones from ponies who aren't idiotic."
Nightmare Moon then scanned the audience once again.
"The pony with the cowboy hat," she pointed to, "What's your question?"
"First of all, it's a Stenson," Applejack corrected, "Secondly, my question is that if Princess Celestia is really gone, then who's going to raise the sun?"
"No one," Nightmare Moon explained menacingly, "For you see, with me in charge, the night shall last forever! That way, everypony will finally appreciate the beauty in the ni-"
"Yeah, Ah'm gonna stop ya right there," Applejack interrupted, "Ya see farmers, like yours truly, need the sun in order for our crops to grow. Do y'all know how many apple trees need the light of the moon?"
"...Um"
"None, that's how many. Not only that, but the sun is also an important life source for us. So how exactly are y'all gonna be the princess of the everlasting night if yer subjects aren't gonna last a week?"
"Um...are there any other questions?" Nightmare asked through a forced smile, "You. The pink one. You have a perfectly normal question, right?"
"Yep," Pinkie said with a real smile, "My question is who raised the sun and moon before you and Celestia?"
"...What?"
"I mean, I know our whole lore revolves around the fact that the two of you raised the sun and moon together, and the powerful ponies before you did it themselves, but who did before that? Are we seriously left to believe that the sun and moon never existed before those ponies? Or are we supposed to believe that the sun and moon did exist, but neither was raised or lowered? 'Cause if that's the case, then who was the asshole that thought he could lower the two things that our world depends on the most?"
"..."
"And while we're on the topic of the sun and moon, how come both of those things still move naturally?" Pinkie continued, "Sure, you and Princess Celestia raise the sun and moon, but that doesn't change the fact that they both still follow natural solar and lunar cycles. Do you both just subconsciously move them with your magic? Or, do you both have a spell that once the sun or moon are raised, they will follow the natural cycles?"
"..."
"You did ask if we had any questions," Pinkie pointed out.
"Didn't you say that you know everything?" Twilight asked.
"I sure do."
"So don't you already know the answers to your questions?"
"Yep."
"Then why are even asking them in the first place?"
"Because I'm a rascal" Pinkie explained with a grin.
"Would you please stop annoying the evil dictator!" Rarity shouted from the balcony, "The last thing she needs is you idiots pissing her off!"
"Thank you," Nightmare said, "Finally. Somepony is actually giving me respect."
"No problem madam," Rarity said politely, "My name is Rarity, by the way. And let me just say: I personally think the sun is overrated."
"Exactly!" Nightmare exclaimed, "For so many years I've been saying the same thing, but nopony has ever-"
"But if I could just make one itty bitty recommendation," Rarity suggested, "You should really change your style if you're serious about ruling over us."
"...I'm sorry. What?"
"I mean, just look at what you're wearing," Rarity explained, "The evil battle armor is just ghastly looking. I nearly fainted just from looking at it."
"That's why you looked horrified?!" Nightmare shouted, "I thought you were scared because of my triumphant return!"
"Oh no, I've never heard of you until tonight."
"...WHAT?!"
"Back to the discussion of your outfit," Rarity continued, "You see, what I'm thinking is maybe something made of silk and a tad bit flamboyant. But don't worry, I can already tell that you're committed to this whole 'darkest night' theme that you've got going on here. This is why I'm thinking we stick to the main color scheme, only darker in some places and brighter in others. With enough effort, I can craft something that will say 'fear me, but respect me as well." What do you say?"
"..."
"I'll take your silence as a yes." Rarity said, "And you're in luck too. Because I just so happen to own the most exquisite dress shop in all of Equestria. And maybe with a bigger budget, I can get to work on spreading said shop across all of Equestria. That way, all your subjects will be just as sharply dressed as you. Nothing says happy kingdom other than a fashionable kingdom, is what I always say."
"Are y'all seriously marketing your brand to the evil dictator?!" Applejack asked flabbergasted.
"Well, what else am I supposed to do to the evil dictator?" Rarity countered, "Grovel and pray that she doesn't destroy me?"
Rarity then turned her attention back to the now shocked Nightmare Moon.
"Now onto the topic of your fangs," Rarity said, "Are those real, or are they those vampire fangs you can buy at a costume shop? Because if they're real, don't worry, I know a stallion who can fix your dentures good as new!"
"...Ok, that's it," Nightmare addressed her subjects, "I will rule Equestria in eternal night, but not until I destroy-"
She pointed at Rarity.
"-You-"
She pointed at a struggling Rainbow Dash.
"-you-"
She pointed at Applejack.
"-you-"
She pointed at Pinkie Pie.
"-you-"
She pointed at Twilight.
"-especially you-"
And then pointed at Fluttershy.
"-and also you."
"What did I do?!" Fluttershy asked.
"Virtually nothing," Nightmare explained, "You just look weak and pathetic. And I like destroying weak and pathetic things. They make me feel powerful. Like when I was a filly and I burned ants with a magnifying glass."
Fluttershy sighed in defeat.
"I guess that makes sense."
"Glad that you understand," Nightmare faced her subjects, "As for the rest of you, you can just go about your business. I'm going to my castle and prepare the destruction for those who annoy me. Farewell!"
Nightmare Moon then disappeared in a puff of smoke, finally releasing Rainbow Dash in the process.
"Ah-ha! Success!" she said triumphantly. Looking around, Rainbow Dash realized that her capture was no longer in the town hall.
"I will not lie, the majority of my attention was drawn to escaping that villainess' clutches. Will somepony please explain to me what I missed." |
Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War | pre | "Oh, buck. Why me?" Seeker mumbled as the cantankerous Griffon from Aeroslida walked up to him.
"So I see you're here as well? What's a weakling like you doing here?" He asked, his one claw resting on the handle of his hammer.
"He's with us!" Joystick said with a smile, not quite understanding what is actually going on.
In truth he was putting some advice he got from a white Pegasus named Surprise to the test: 'anypony can be a friend. Just treat them the way you want to be treated and you'll be friends in no time!'
"Oh?" The Griffon raised his one eyebrow as he looked at Joystick, "and who might you be?"
"I'm Joystick. The Unicorn over there is Mixer -" Mixer returned the Griffon's hostile glare with his own cold expression, "- the Pegasus there is Everlasting Solace, or just Solace and I guess you already met Star Seeker."
The Griffon looked back at Seeker, "You're an even bigger loser than I thought if you associate yourself with these losers."
Joystick's expression fell, "That's not very nice you know."
"Don't ca-" The Griffon was interrupted as a loud and annoyed voice made itself known.
"Blackheart, get your feathered rear end back here!" The voice belonged to a Diamond Dog with a dark grey pelt. His armour was made from pieces of varying sizes, haphazardly placed together into a form of makeshift armour. "Hello, I am Rufus. I'm the leader of this ragtag group: Fate's Fortune. Who are you?"
"We are Divine Retribution," Joystick replied, his expression softening as Rufus' expression showed kindness behind it rather than Blackheart's disdain. "Mind if I ask what you're up to?"
"Not at all. Come join us." The four joined the other four, keeping a good distance between themselves and Blackheart.
The map was confirmed to be that of the Everfree Forest and the outlying area which included Sweet Apple Acres. There were a few clearings where symbols for various resources were indicated. There was one other symbol that stood on its own. It was a crumbling brick tower with the words: 'lv9' just under it.
"Now, my group are prepping a journey into the Dagger's Keep." Rufus pointed to the tower with his paw. "It was said to be an old lookout tower back when Celestia and Luna used the old castle which is deeper in the forest. What was also said was that this tower possessed its own enchanted armoury."
"Why are we telling them this?" Blackheart interjected, put off by the fact he was sitting with the Changeling that was responsible for his embarrassment. The fact that it was actually Illusion who did the damage didn't change his attitude: all Changelings were the same to him.
"When somepony interrupts," a pale blue Minotaur shouted as he punched Blackheart with one of his gauntlets, "show them who's boss!"
"Thanks Tauros," Rufus said with a grin as Blackheart fell back in his seat. "I blame your attitude Blackheart. It will obviously be guarded so we had best go prepared."
"This place sounds like it could be a good haul," Joystick said aloud.
"Maybe, but this dungeon is one of those unique ones isn't it?" Mixer asked, making Rufus nod his head.
"Correct, it requires a Crystal Key to open. Luckily for my group, we have such a key," Rufus said.
"So I gather that means that we won't be able to get in then?" Joystick surmised.
"That's right chumps," Blackheart said with a high and mighty expression on his face.
"Tauros?" Rufus was answered as Tauros bashed Blackheart on the head once more. "I apologise for his behaviour. As much as his attitude leaves much to be desired, his combat skills make up for it... most of the time."
"Well, there are always those ones aren't there?" Solace said with a chuckle. "Come on everypony, we won't get anywhere by just standing here. There's a mug of cold hard cider calling my name."
"You drink, Mr. Solace?" Rufus inquired. Solace nodded his head in response. "I'm in a bit of a sporting mood today so how about a proposition? You and Tauros in a drinking contest. The one who is left standing gets the Key."
"Well, you don't have much incentive to go through with this, do you?" Joystick asked as Blackheart got up, groaning and holding his head.
"How about a best out of three instead?" Blackheart quipped, "three contests: a pvp match; the drinking contest you mentioned and finally an endurance race through Whitetail Woods?"
"That's actually a good idea. Sound good to you guys?" Rufus asked.
"Yeah but you still never answered the question: why are you willing to throw away a Crystal Key? I mean it makes no sense," Joystick pointed out.
"Well, I've always been a bit of a compulsive gambler. But I have one condition: whosoever wins shares the spoils with the other group but they may keep the best items for themselves. Because I'm such a nice Diamond Dog," Rufus chuckled.
The group gave Joystick an affirmative nod, "Ok then Rufus... you're on." |
Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War | To PvP or not to… on second thought, come at me Bro! | Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War
To PvP or not to... on second thought, come at me Bro!
Author: Draconis187
Best read in Dark Mode. Several bright text colours are used.
The morning sun shone brightly into Seeker's room, rousing the Changeling from his slumber. As he opened his eyes he noticed his I.P.V. laid on the floor next to him. He had also seemed to have fallen off the cloud he had laid on, resulting in a rather uncomfortable sleeping position that gifted him a sore carapace and sleepy wing.
He got up and placed the device away near the computer tower. The cloud was placed in its hiding spot which consisted of being under the floorboards in the kitchen. If the landlady had maintained the apartment like she should have been, he would have never been able to hide it in the first place.
The rest of his morning routine consisted of him having a shower and having breakfast before changing his form to suit the masses. As the door opened up, any pony looking his way would only see any every day Pegasus on his way like any other pony.
The observatory was quiet as it usually was during the morning. All Seeker had to do at this time was calibrate the telescope. Celestia only knew how the hunk of metal and glass lenses kept getting out of focus.
'I blame over-inquisitive fillies and colts with long hooves,' Seeker thought as he played about with the various knobs and looking through the eyepiece.
The rest of the observatory staff had their hooves full doing other menial, monotonous work. While many ponies wouldn't often care for being an astronomer, Seeker enjoyed the low-profile environment. It made the odds of him being discovered very low.
By the time lunch came Seeker found he needed to replace two rather large lenses as one had become cracked while one had simply vanished. How it was possible to get it out without breaking the telescope and what a pony could want with such a large lens was an annoyingly pressing question on his mind.
Seeker walked over to the usual coffee shop, where Joystick was waiting for him. The 'Pegasus' sat down opposite his friend and ordered camelmile tea.
"So, any thoughts?" Joystick asked Seeker with a raised eyebrow as the requested tea arrived. Joystick had opted to go with lemonade.
"Concerning what exactly?" Seeker responded.
Joystick tilted his head to the side and gave Seeker a rather odd look, "About that little 'best of three' that the Griffon spoke of yesterday in Old Ponyville."
Seeker merely shrugged and took a sip of his tea, "I don't know what to think. Solace is already going to be competing in the drinking contest so that leaves the PvP match and the race to deal with."
"There is one small problem though, Seeker," Joystick said before ordering a chocolate chip muffin.
"What is it?" Seeker inquired as he ordered a lemon and poppy seed muffin.
"Their party consists of five members," Joystick replied, "We have only four so I was thinking-"
"That I try and convince Illusion to help out?" Seeker interrupted, eying Joystick intently.
Joystick smiled, "Yup! What do you think?"
Seeker looked into his near empty cup pensively. He wondered if she even would come to help them out and if she did, could he convince the only true Changeling he had met since he was ordered to participate in the Royal Wedding Fiasco - by which he had obviously refused - to stick around a little longer?
"Uh, hello? Equestria to Seeker, come in Seeker," Joystick said, wafting the poppy seed muffin his friend had ordered under his nose with his magic and a grin on his face.
Seeker jolted a little as he looked at the muffin and then to Joystick who merely smiled at him. Seeker grabbed the muffin in his hooves and took a small bite.
"I'll try," Seeker managed to say before fully digging into the savoury treat that stood 30cm tall.
The coffee shop had a penchant for making obscenely large savoury treats. Their flapjacks were the size of dinner plates and were 1,5cm thick. Then there was the fact that they came in batches of four. To eat them all in a single sitting was a battle in and of itself.
"Thanks," Joystick said as he levitated his muffin and took a bite, "So have you thought about specializing?"
Sadly to Seeker the latter sentence came out a garbled mess like a radio with horrific reception, "You do realise you shouldn't talk with your mouth full. You are out in public after all."
Joystick merely brushed the statement off and swallowed what he had in his mouth, "I said: 'have you thought about specializing?'"
"What do you mean?" Seeker asked.
"Every class has a subclass or two," Joystick explained, "A Paladin is Warrior class but can specialize as a Soldier or a Blademaster as well as a few others.
"Solace's subclass is Hunter as you already know and that is a subclass of the Ranger class. Mixer is a Mage while his subclass makes him focus on a certain aspect of magic. In this case it is crystal magic," Joystick explained, earning a raised eyebrow from Seeker, "Specializing is a must as you can't be a jack of all trades. Causes balancing issues game-wise. So when we get back online I would ask you take a look at them and find a specialization that suits you."
Seeker only nodded in response as his mouth was preoccupied with his muffin. The better part of their respective lunch breaks consisted of random, friendly chatter until they paid up and left the shop.
With the telescope needing to wait for the replacement parts, Seeker effectively had the night off. He went about his gaming preparation routine and triple checked the bolts on his door as well as the windows. With his curtains drawn and everything bolted down he walked over to his gaming station.
Seeker placed the I.P.V. upon his head and got comfortable on his cloud once more. The usual whirs from his platform of choice placed a smile on his face as the virtual world of Equestrian Earth took over his senses.
Seeker awoke on a bed inside the Drunken Mare. The top floor acted like a spawn point for adventurers. There were several more spawn points littered around Old Ponyville but the party had been in the bar when they logged off and it effectively became the focal point of their return.
Seeker looked around and found he was alone in the top floor, not counting the NPC maid that was dusting in the corner and completely ignoring him. The Changeling got off the bed and rummaged through his inventory as he buzzed down the steps.
He found the Chat Scroll that Mixer had used to contact Joystick and Seeker with. As he unfurled it, it shone in a pale yellow glow in anticipation for a command.
"Uh... how do you use this thing?" Seeker muttered.
The Scroll heard his request and the glow faded as maroon lettering began to appear as if it was being written by an invisible source right before his eyes. It gave a detailed description of what the Scroll did and how it was able to send its messages.
Due to not everypony having magic or opposable appendages, the Scroll could be dictated to in order to create a message. If the message was private in nature, nopony would be able to listen in on the pony's dictation and would also see a pixelated mouth, making it impossible to lip-read the conversation.
"Receiver... Illusion," Seeker said. The Scroll went blank and wrote the words 'Send to: Illusion' on the top.
"Subject: Assistance required," Seeker dictated to the 'magic' Scroll, "I am in a slight bind as my party has been challenged into a series of three contests in Old Ponyville. Our opponents are five in total while we are only four, hence my reason for contacting you. If you can lend your assistance it would be most appreciated. Send."
The scroll glowed and rolled itself up before its contents vanished. The scroll reopened and showed a blank sheet, ready for another message.
Seeker rolled the Chat Scroll back up before putting it inside his inventory and pulled out his stats scroll and began looking at the one labelled 'Specialization'. It offered four specializations: Saboteur, Mechanic, Turret Defender and Pyrotechnics Expert. Each one was uniquely different with its own set of abilities and bonuses.
"I'll pick... this one," Seeker mumbled to himself as he pressed a hoof against the Saboteur profile.
In an instant the other three profiles greyed out and vanished from the scroll, leaving only the Saboteur's skills behind. The icons began to connect to each other, forming a web or a 'Skill Tree' as it was more colloquially known as.
Specialization Gained!!
Saboteur!
For those who like things that go BOOM!!
Seeker just blinked as his HUD showed new but greyed out skills after his Pot Shot ability. There was only a single ability ready for Seeker: 'Grenade Pack.'
"Uh, this is going to be interesting," Seeker mumbled as he left the inn and walked out into the streets.
"Seeker!" The Changeling looked around and found his other party members waiting for him just a short distance away. The source of the shout was none other than Joystick.
As he walked over to the group, he felt the familiar sensation of the Chat Scroll in his inventory. He pulled it out with a bit of magic and unfurled it.
<Illusion>I am on my way.</Illusion>
Seeker smiled meekly as he gave a customary thank you in response but failed to notice where he was going and bumped into Joystick's chestplate. The group laughed at the Changeling's absent-mindedness, Seeker even joined in half-heartedly as he got back onto his hooves.
"How is everypony?" Seeker asked.
"I am fine," Mixer deadpanned.
"Looking forward to getting drunk," Solace said with a grin.
"You look forward to anything regarding alcohol," Mixer retorted, rolling his eyes.
"I have actually been meaning to ask," Seeker said, "How can you get drunk in a virtual world?"
Joystick laughed, "The I.P.V. is a device that simulates the real world to an almost perfect degree thanks to some fancy bit of technology, magic and science. Not too mention the mind is a powerful thing when it's told something that it can't refute.
"The I.P.V. sends electrical signals directed at the parts controlling the various senses in the brain. This in turn is interpreted by the brain and you 'feel' whatever you interact with in the game. It's how you can feel your weapon in your hooves, the pain from an attack, your sense of taste even and also... it allows you to get drunk by tricking the brain into thinking the body is actually consuming the beverage!" Joystick laughed.
"Not to mention your own alcohol tolerance is taken into account as well," Solace grinned, "If they think a Minotaur can out drink me they have another thing coming."
"So then that leaves the PvP match and the race," Mixer noted.
Joystick nodded, "Yeah, any word from Illusion, Seeker?"
Seeker smirked, "She's coming. She was quite fast when I had first met her so I think she'd be best off doing the race while we do the PvP match."
The group exchanged smiles as a familiar buzzing came from overhead, making Seeker's ears perk up and look for the source. It was Illusion, coming in fast and landing on the ground in front of them. She looked at Seeker with a small smile but it faded quickly as her gaze shifted to the ponies.
"A river is like time," She said, looking at the group. The group just looked at her with confused expressions, causing her to sigh.
"It never loops, forever going forward," Seeker replied, making Illusion smile slightly again, "This is Illusion, everypony. Illusion, how are you at racing?"
"I will go as fast as I need," She replied curtly.
'I like her attitude,' Mixer thought as the sides of his mouth curled up in a barely noticeable grin.
'A real mascot of joy and goodwill isn't she?' Solace thought.
"Okay then, I believe we are all set for those matches then," Joystick said as he pulled out the Chat Scroll.
In a few minutes the party of Fate's Fortune met up with Divine Retribution just on the outskirts of town, near Whitetail Woods. Blackheart was giving Seeker a viscous look and made the customary 'I am going to kill you' gesture as he slowly ran his claw past his neck with his thumb sticking out.
Rufus looked happy to see everypony, like a long lost friend had returned, "Have you all decided on who is doing what then? I have Blackheart, Terence over there and Carlos for the PvP match."
"I said a thousand times before, my name is Calamity!" 'Carlos' the Hippogriff whined. Turned out it was a lady's voice.
Terence was the red Minotaur and gave the group a smile as his name was mentioned. Seeker's eyes wouldn't leave the pony sized sword he had on his back, it terrified him despite he was in no true danger in a game.
"Sure, Calamity," Rufus replied with a grin, "I just like rustling your jimmies a little. Oh and I am going to be racing against you. Your turn to tell us your line-up."
Before Joystick could respond, Illusion walked up to Rufus and eyed him intently with a stoic expression, "You will lose the race against me."
"Doesn't lack for confidence, does she?" Mixer whispered to Solace who merely shrugged.
Rufus laughed, "You got spunk! I like that. I'll see you at the starting line then Miss...?"
"My name is of little importance to you," She responded callously.
Seeker's ears drooped as he watched her stare down Rufus as if he were dirt. She was like their Blackheart and that could be very dangerous.
"Okay, I win then you tell me your name. Sound good, lass?" Rufus asked.
Illusion didn't respond and walked back to the group, "Wow, you got a live one there. So I guess it's the two Unicorns and the Changeling going against my guys in the arena then?"
"The Skydome in Aeroslida?" Joystick asked, feeling a little annoyed that he would have to travel so far from his friends.
Rufus shook his head, "There have been a few more additional arenas built over the past few game updates to keep up with the popularity of PvP matches. Old Ponyville has one just outside the village. Kills the authenticity of the village but it already died the moment they put the Zeppelin Depot in."
"Yeah, it does tend to kill the historical aspect of Ponyville," Solace commented before looking at Tauros, "You ready to lose?"
"When you face arrogance," He began to respond, "Make them soil their pants!"
"You have a strange speech pattern," Seeker commented.
"He only does it to practice for his seminars," Terence explained, "He finds the rhyming helps his self-confidence messages stick."
"Waitwaitwait. You're Iron Will?" Joystick asked with a shocked expression on his face.
Tauros puffed out his chest proudly, "Iron Will's the name. Training ponies is my game!"
Mixer rolled his eyes, "He's Iron Will alright."
"Well then now that introductions are done, shall we get cracking chaps?" Rufus inquired, clapping his paws together once to grab everypony's attention.
"Let's do this thing!" Joystick cried out happily.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
The Old Ponyville PvP Arena was a large, circular coliseum made from varying types of timber to make it look less bland, the differing shades of brown complimenting each other instead of clashing. The stands were divided in rows and columns of benches with varnished, oaken finishes. The more 'private' stands were made of mahogany and the benches had velvet cushioning.
In the centre of the Arena was a large open field of grass, kept at four millimetres in height. This made it soft on the hooves, despite the fact that it would just get torn to shreds during a match. Its only real purpose was to add to the Arena's aesthetics.
The Arena had four rooms for the players: two were to get whatever gear they had stored in player chests which could be found all over Equestrian Earth's hub cities. Several players can access the same chest but they would only find their loot and spare gear inside.
The other two were planning rooms, complete with whiteboards and an assortment of markers. Erasers were also supplied and nothing other than the players' own gear were allowed to leave.
"You ready, Seeker?" Joystick asked as Seeker examined his Bow Gun.
"W-well... not really," Seeker replied nervously, "I mean this is the first PvP I've ever done."
"Just keep a level head and shoot straight," Mixer deadpanned as he pulled out a long sabre with a ruby blade and a tower shield comprised of topaz with emerald insets, "They won't show you any mercy, so don't give them any."
"Uh, Mixer?" Seeker asked.
"Yes, what is it?" Mixer replied, raising one of his eyebrows.
"Why aren't you using your staff?" Seeker responded, pointing to the Unicorn's new weapon loadout.
"Joystick isn't the only one who can tank," Mixer replied with a small grin.
"So then Seeker, did you find a specialization?" Joystick asked, "If not then you may have a harder time in the match and further down the line. We can help you find one if you want us to."
Seeker looked to his skills and activated Grenade Pack. In an instant his Bow Gun vanished as two khaki saddlebags appeared on his sides. The bags felt as if they weighed nothing at all and his wings still had free range of motion so he could still fly.
Joystick whistled, "We got ourselves a bomber here folks.'
<----> ---- ---- <---->
As players sat in their seats in the Arena, a loud and very excited voice rang out through the Arena, scaring birds from trees and shattering glasses. If the Arena was in the real Equestria and bound by its laws of physics, everypony's eardrums would have burst into flames and melted out of their ears.
"Hala hala hala!!!" It shouted, "Your host with the most... DJ-PON3 is in the hoooooouuuse!!!"
A second, slightly annoyed voice came out after the DJ's, "And I am Neon Lights. I am running colour commentary for the matches today... and trying to keep my co-host from getting too excited."
"Awww, don't be such a stiff, Neon!" DJ-PON3 replied, "I just wanted to make an entrance."
"What you did, Vinyl... was almost render everypony here deaf," Neon rebuked, "Please, just keep the volume a tad down ok?"
Vinyl sighed, "Fine, I'll tone it down a little. Now then everypony we have ourselves a number of matches today. We have Oblivion Knights versus The Reapers of Fate in a whole eight on eight Guild Match! But before we get to them we have a small treat for you.
"We have a three on three PvP match coming up but that's nothing special am I right? Wrong!" She shouted, loud enough to make Neon cringe and remove his earphones, "Whoops sorry there, Neon. As I was saying: this match is rather unique because it's one of three different simultaneous matches happening in Old Ponyville!
"We have Divine Retribution's Everlasting Solace versus Tauros of Fate's Fortune in a no holds barred drinking contest in the Drunken Mare. Then we have Illusion of Retribution going up against the leader of Fortune in a race through Whitetail Woods. Be careful you two, I hear parasprites are there this time of year.
"Finally we have our little match here and get this folks. It's a Changeling and two Unicorns from Retribution versus a Hippogriff, a Griffon and a Minotaur. I'm a Unicorn as well but come on, they'll tear Retribution a new one. What do you think Neon?" Vinyl concluded, looking to her agitated co-host who donned his headgear again.
Neon thought for a moment before responding, "Well this is Divine Retribution's first ever PvP match to be honest and most of their members are still quite new."
Vinyl scoffed, "Noobs."
"Quite, Vinyl. As I was saying: Divine Retribution - although new - has a Crystal Mage, a Paladin and a Saboteur in the match line-up today. Fate's Fortune on the other hoof has been in a variety of PvP matches so they know what to expect but they have a weak link in their group. Second in command Blackheart is known for getting himself into a lot of trouble as his temper is quite volatile."
"Like my first Bass Cannon," Vinyl joked.
Neon rolled his eyes, "Anyway. Calamity the Hippogriff is an Animal Caller. She can overwhelm Retribution with sheer numbers if given the chance to use any of her abilities. Blackheart is a Blademaster so he is deadly with any form of melee weapon. Terence is a Soldier, simple but deadly with swords and deals major damage against a single target.
"Now on Retribution's side is their leader, the Paladin called Joystick. I've heard he is relatively easy going... remind you of anypony, Vinyl?" Neon asked, giving Vinyl a look as she looked away and whistled a little tune in response, "I rest my case but I digress. Paladins can heal and take a lot of punishment so he is a valuable member of the group but also a high value target.
"Next is the Crystal Mage known as Mixer. Not much to say about him other than he keeps to himself when not around his guild members. Crystal Mages are nasty DPS players and can take more damage than a conventional mage specializing in any other element.
"Lastly we have Star Seeker the Changeling and Saboteur. This subclass is deadly to clusters of enemies as explosives are their forte. They don't take damage too well but make up for it as they pound targets from range. All in all, Retribution has a more rounded group than Fortune's one trick ponies. Pardon the pun."
"Well then, there you have it folks!" Vinyl shouted, a little less harshly as the players came out, "Now then everypony shake hooves, claws, or whatever you have and let's get this party started!"
Blackheart looked to Seeker with a demonic looking grin, "I am going to enjoy this."
Mixer stepped forward, "You'll have to go through us first, featherbrain."
Blackheart growled as the players stepped back and Vinyl took out a subwoofer that stood as tall as she did, "Alright then everypony... Fight!!"
A massive ear-splitting blast and beam of blue energy came from Vinyl's almighty Bass Cannon, making everypony cringe and get down as it blasted their eardrums.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
The Drunken Mare was packed with spectators as they watched Solace and Tauros take their seats, both grinning confidently. The first round of virtual alcohol came in large mugs, holding a maximum of two pints of golden goodness.
Tauros looked at Solace, "You can still quit. I doubt you can handle it."
Solace raised an eyebrow and chuckled, "Iron Will... meet my Iron Constitution!"
The players heard Vinyl's Bass Cannon echoing through Old Ponyville to signal the start of the three matches. Solace and Tauros grabbed their respective mugs and looked at each other.
"May the best drinker win," Solace said as he began downing the mug with a look of pure bliss on his face.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Illusion looked down the trail of the track she and Rufus were going to be using. She barely responded to Rufus' questions regarding her or her motives in being with Divine Retribution. She knew mind games and he was a complete amateur if he was actually trying to make her change guilds or trip her up.
The track had a calm, serene look to it as it awaited the players to hear the starting signal so that they may begin.
"Okay before we start my dear the race has two simple rules," Rufus said to Illusion with a twisted looking smile, "The first rule is to not directly attack the other player. The second is no flying so no using your wings in any way."
Illusion merely nodded to confirm she understood which made Rufus raise an eyebrow at her, "You don't talk all that much do you?"
"Only when there is something worth saying," She curtly replied as she stared down the track like a hunter stalking prey.
"We-" Rufus was cut off as Vinyl's Bass Cannon reverberated through the area, shaking birds from the trees, "Here we go!"
The pair ran off into the forest, kicking up dust from their hooves as the race began.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Blackheart brought his hammer down on Mixer who parried it with his tower shield and sent Blackheart almost faceplanting to the floor as the hammer slid across the surface of the shield. Mixer brought his sabre down to Blackheart's neck but neglected to notice Terence's blade coming for him.
As the huge blade came down at him, Joystick intervened by ramming into him with his Shining Beacon ability active to negate most of the damage he received from his assault.
Seeker fired off Pot Shot at Calamity's horde of crows as they tried to attack the group. The crowd cheered on for whoever they supported in the bout as none gave the other any quarter.
"This is really a hot battle!" Vinyl cried out cheerfully, "What ability is the Paladin using, Neon?"
"Shining Beacon is an ability that increases damage resistance and in the world makes the user a target making it a perfect tactic for tank players," Neon responded, "That doesn't work here in a PvP match though but it is still useful in combat."
Blackheart changed targets as Seeker was busy with Calamity and bought down his hammer, using his Hammer of Thor ability.
"Seeker!" Joystick called out, trying to warn his teammate.
Seeker turned around and rolled to the side to avoid the incoming hit. The hammer almost grazed his armour as it collided with the ground, creating a shockwave of lightning to burst forth and send him flying into the air.
The Changeling collided with the nearby wall with a sickening crunch. Mixer ran up to Seeker and stood fast as Blackheart came down again with the same move. But Mixer had another idea.
Mixer shoved his sabre's blade into the ground, calling on his Fortress ability. Blackheart had too much momentum and his face collided with the wall of topaz, stooping him from finishing his attack. He seemed to hang there for a second before his face slid off and hit the ground.
"Th-thanks," Seeker said as he got up and readied his gun.
"Like I said: 'they won't show you mercy, so don't show them any.'"
Seeker nodded and used his Grenade Pack ability. As his weapon switched to a pair of saddlebags, his skill list changed completely. His list showed a total of five skills: Cluster Grenades, Incendiary Grenade, Blind Grenade, Smoke Grenade and lastly Freeze Grenade.
"Oh ho! Looks like the Changeling is going for something with a bit more 'umph!'" Vinyl shouted in glee as Seeker flew upwards, "Neon, tell the crowd what party favours the Changeling is bringing to the table."
"As I said earlier, Saboteurs excel with explosives and what he has there are two saddlebags packed with them," Neon replied, "That pack makes the Saboteur both versatile and deadly."
Seeker reached into the pack and activated Incendiary Grenade. The grenade that came out of the saddlebags was oval in shape and clear as glass. Inside of the glass was a raging fire, just waiting to give grief to whomsoever crossed the thrower. Seeker aimed at Calamity as she sent a stampede of bears at Joystick who was dodging them as best he could.
Joystick couldn't dodge the angry bears for too long as sweat dripped from his forehead. He knew that the next bear that came at him would more than likely take him out. He dodged again but tripped and mentally prepared himself as a bear barrelled towards him, death written in its eyes. As it got up to maul the Paladin, it burst into flame.
In fact it was on the edge of an area encased in a roaring inferno of orange, yellow and blue hues. Calamity flew up and out of it, her fur and feathers ablaze. Before the Hippogriff could recover, a hailstorm of rubies came down on her, sending her to the ground.
She collided on the ground with a thump. She gathered her wits and got back up, only to have Joystick's armoured head get acquainted with her face. He had enough mana to activate Shining Beacon once more before he rammed into her.
She flew backwards and into the wall, her body lighting up brightly before it shattered like glass, sending fragments all over the Arena floor. Terence got back onto his hooves, still groggy from when Mixer smashed his face in with his shield before helping Seeker with Blackheart.
"Aaaaand down goes Calamity!" Vinyl shouted, "Looks like Divine Retribution knows how to work together. Are you taking notes here, Blackheart?"
Blackheart growled at Vinyl's comment and flew up to Seeker, planning on making him hurt. Blackheart failed to realise that Griffons - although tougher than a Changeling, regardless of class - were not as fast as Changelings in the air or on the ground. With the added weight of his equipped hammer, his wild charge was similar to watching a tortoise running after an eagle as it flew over a cliff.
Seeker banked left and avoided Blackheart's rage filled attack. Seeker twisted his body to turn himself upside down and reached into his Grenade pack for his Cluster Grenades. As he threw his 'weapon' instead of a single grenade, it was three that collided with Blackheart's body, detonating in a shower of fragments and heat.
Seeker fell onto the ground as he was too low to the ground to land properly but the combined force from his grenades launched Blackheart further up into the air. Seeker rolled to the side as a large blade came into view with force. His dodge saved him from a critical blow but the force of Terence's Fissure ability put him in the middle of a crack in the ground as fire burst from it.
Seeker got burned as his body became encased in fire. He cried out in agony as the I.P.V. simulated the pain in order to make the game as real as possible. Joystick used his Divinity's Light ability to heal Seeker as best he could.
The flames died out eventually as Terence brought his blade down on Seeker's shield. The force alone was able to crack the Crystal Mage's shield down the middle but it held firm in defiance. The attack's damage went though the shield and hurt Mixer regardless as Perfect Offense was an armour piercing ability.
Blackheart fell to the ground with a crash but he was still in the game. As he got up he saw Seeker's Smoke Grenade collide with Terence. As the Minotaur got out of the smoke cloud, he got jumped by Mixer's shield as it bashed him across the jaw and right into Joystick's shortsword as it connected with his throat.
Terence burst in a shower of light just like Calamity as he reappeared in the equipment room they were using.
"You're dead!" Blackheart shouted as he charged at them with his hammer but he tripped and fell down before reaching his target, "What in hell?"
He looked down at this legs to find them encased in crystal by Mixer's Hinder ability, whose secondary function is his Encase ability. Before Blackheart could recover, a wall of crystals erupted from the ground, surrounding him.
"The stage is set everypony!" Mixer shouted as his sabre was hilt deep in the ground.
Joystick used the last of his mana to use Divinity's Light on the crystals. Blackheart shouted in pain as he was blinded by the bright light. Seeker used his Grenade Pack ability to switch back to his Bow Gun.
He pulled down on the bolt to load the next round and fired off Pot Shot at the wall, shattering it into thousands of pieces as they pierced Blackheart's armour. Blackheart gave one last shout as he vanished from the battlefield.
"Aaaaaaaaand we have ourselves some winners!!" Vinyl shouted in joy, "Looks like it doesn't take experience to win a match. It takes teamwork!"
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Solace and Tauros were drinking for everything they were worth. Empty mugs piled on the floor below, each respective pile could be used to make a tower taller than Tauros but they showed very little sign of slowing down as the drinks kept coming.
"How can a pony like you keep up with me?" Tauros asked, "I thought Pegasi were lightweights because they weigh so little."
Solace chuckled as he downed another two pints, "When we finish here, I'll tell you. Sound fair?"
Tauros chuckled as yet another round came to the table, "Deal."
The pair kept on drinking and baiting each other into giving up but none of them seemed like they were going to any time soon. The inn was almost deafeningly loud as spectators chanted and cheered for them as more mugs came to sate their nigh unquenchable thirsts.
It wasn't till the twenty-first mug came that Tauros was looking a bit groggier than Solace who was finding it a little harder to hold his mug to his lips without getting a minor case of the shakes.
"You ready to give up, Solace?" Tauros asked as his eyes were beginning to look a little glazed over.
"Nah, I can... keep going," Solace replied as he finally downed the drink.
"Good... cause I'm not either," Tauros said as he lifted another full mug.
As the wood and metal-clad container reached the Minotaur's lips, he faltered slightly but he inhaled deeply and began to drink. As he took a large gulp of the beverage, he placed it back down on the table with a smug look on his face.
"I'll never... quit," He said as he finally keeled over and crashed onto the floor, completely knocked out and snoring loudly. Sadly his mug was still in his grip and it came down with him, covering his face in liquor.
Solace scoffed a little as he looked at Tauros and took another swig of liquor to finish it off, "Lightweight my flank."
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Players watched from zeppelins of varying design above as the two racers charged through the Whitetail Woods. They jumped over fallen trees, muddy puddles in the ground and the like but they kept pace with each other.
"Miss... you are... the best... competition I've had in ages..." Rufus complimented through pained breaths as he and Illusion were neck and neck.
Illusion didn't respond as she kept her eyes focused on the track as it bent to the left and into a few more broken trees. This was a deliberate move as the programmers designed it to make it a little bit more interesting than a simple straight track with nothing to make it somewhat more difficult.
Then there were the next bout of interference: Parasprites. They were nasty little creatures with a penchant for consuming every bit of food within spitting distance. Unfortunately the developers decided to change their behaviour to have them attack players and eat their health instead.
The worst part about them was that they came in groups of a minimum of five a piece. Illusion rolled to the side as a bunch of parasprites flew towards her, trying to drain her health.
"They're... annoying... aren't they?" Rufus commented as he slid under them, avoiding them by the skin of his teeth.
Illusion still didn't respond to the Diamond Dog as she slid down an embankment and leapt over a ditch, Rufus not far behind. The Diamond Dog was still managing to keep up but Illusion's lighter frame meant she gained more ground as she leapt over obstacles.
'I can't lose,' He thought through clenched teeth, 'I won't lose.'
As Illusion gained a little more ground on Rufus, her vision began to blur slightly and a case of light-headedness assaulted her. Before she could figure out why, she collided with a tree. She heard laughter as Rufus ran past... a long wooden, gnarled staff in his teeth.
"Why that no good..." Illusion muttered as her vision corrected itself, "Damned Illusionist. You said no attacking!"
Rufus laughed, his voice beginning to fade, "I said no attacking but you ran into that tree on your own accord!"
She got up and began to try and catch up to Rufus but she was quickly running out of track. Five bends and one wide, deep trench separated them from the finish line.
She saw Rufus as a small dot in the distance but a snide grin formed on her lips. She activated her Mirror Image ability and kept on running.
Rufus knew Illusion had no hope of catching up as he ran around one of the bends. His enormous grin instantly fell as he saw Illusion charge straight past him. His jaw then decided to acquaint itself with the floor as Illusion went out his vision as she went around one of the bends.
"H-How?" He panted as he tried to run faster, coming up to the trench.
From behind Rufus, Illusion came up towards him at breakneck speed, her Terminal Velocity ability active. Rufus leapt as he attempted to clear the trench. Illusion leapt up after him, landing on his back and kicking him down.
"Y-" Rufus' outburst was cut off as his body impacted with the trench wall, his muzzle almost buried in the dirt.
"Never cheat a Changeling," Illusion warned as she carried on to the finish line, a satisfied smile on her face.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
"We won!" Joystick shouted in glee, hugging Mixer and Seeker.
"We know, we were there," Mixer deadpanned, "Now can you let us go?"
"Sorry..." Joystick replied sheepishly as he released his grip on his guild members.
"I'm glad to see you're all happy," A voice came from behind them as the trio left the Arena. Solace had a grin that was a mile wide, plastered to his face.
"Judging by that expression on your face, you were successful, Solace?" Mixer inquired.
"Yup! Never challenge a pony from Stalliongrad to a drinking contest if you plan on walking home!" He replied proudly.
"What about Illusion?" Seeker asked.
"Haven't se- there she is," Solace noticed Illusion walking up to them, a small grin on her face as well, "Looks like you were victorious."
"Indeed, the dog thought he could cheat me to win so I showed him what happens when you pull tricks on me," She replied curtly.
"Yo players!" Vinyl's voice shouted, gathering everypony's attention, a small chest in her magic grip as she walked up to them, "Your prize."
Joystick opened the chest to reveal a clear key with ruby insets on the bow of the key. The bit consisted of three arrow tips and it had no shoulder to stop it from going too far into a Crystal Lock.
"So they gave you the key to give to us?" Mixer asked, "How strange."
"Whatever dude," Vinyl said as she shrugged her shoulders, "I was told to give this to you once you all finished, regardless of the outcome."
"Wait a minute. They wanted you to give it to us even if we lost?" Joystick asked, shocked.
"You need to turn up the speech volume in your settings," Vinyl retorted, "Yes that is what I'm saying."
"Well should we see Fate's Fortune again we should thank them," Solace said with a smile.
"This seems awfully suspicious to me," Illusion commented, "A Crystal Key is meant to be untradeable. They can't give it away even with the wager system in place for PvP matches. Crystal Keys aren't included."
"Is it a fake then?" Seeker asked, looking at the ornate key.
"No that's the real deal. I've seen a few but haven't been able to obtain one," Illusion continued, "I say we go to whatever you wanted to unlock with it to make sure. If I'm wrong we can track them down and fix the issue. If I'm right though... it opens a whole can of worms."
Vinyl shook her head, "It's real, chick. I check every item put into the wager system here and this is as legit as they come. But there is something else on my mind that's narly in all the wrong ways.
"I check the guilds and players with Neon before every match. So we know who's going against who, ya know?" Vinyl said with a frown on her face, "Fate's Fortune is new... made two days ago. What I didn't understand is that their records are far too good for mere noobs and they're IP addresses aren't in the system.
"That's not the strange part. Anypony can be good and get strong quickly if they pick the game up quickly enough and have an affinity for it," Vinyl continued, her expression growing morbid as she removed her glasses to reveal her red eyes, "Fate's Fortune disbanded five minutes ago... the players? Gone... there's no trace of them, not even an account for their subscription fees. Whoever they were, I think you five were the target..." |
Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War | Learning Curve | Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War
Learning Curve
Author: Draconis187
Best read in Dark Mode. Several bright text colours are used.
If there was one thing every Changeling had in common in terms of personality, it was paranoia. It stemmed from the fear of being discovered. While most get over it and manage to truly 'integrate' into society, others find it too hard and become the introverts within society and in effect fail their given missions.
Seeker could barely concentrate as the new lenses for the telescope came in for the cracked one. Two spares were placed into storage which lay beneath the observatory under lock and key while a third one was being used as the replacement, levitating in the air thanks to a Unicorn.
The job called for two ponies, the Unicorn to lift and insert the lens while a Pegasus used their keen eyesight - a moot point given Seeker was a Changeling - to direct it from above. The Pegasus usually hovered next to the telescope or above it as the lens was being inserted since the openings between models varied.
"Concentrate, Seeker... Can you hear me?" The Unicorn asked, with a slightly annoyed tone.
"Hm? Sorry, Horizon. I'm not feeling like myself today," Seeker apologised. "Kind of have things nagging my mind."
Event Horizon shrugged his shoulders, "Having one of 'those' days?"
"You could say that," Seeker replied.
"Look, how about we deal with this lens first and you can tell me all about it? Sound good?" Event said.
Seeker smiled slightly and nodded his head. He was glad that so many ponies cared about each other. It was a massive shock the first time he stepped out of his Hive on a small infiltration mission to a place called Baltimare. In a few years he got used to it and grew to appreciate it.
After they inserted the lens, Seeker calibrated it while Horizon fetched some coffee. The work was monotonous, they got the most minimal of work benefits and rarely got any appreciation but Seeker found some enjoyment in it. As he was satisfied with the telescope's calibration, he sat on his haunches and waited for Horizon.
"So, what's been eating you?" Horizon asked, blowing the bang of his magenta mane away from his face. The lime green Unicorn levitated the cup of hot liquid to Seeker.
"Just some age old paranoia, Horizon." Seeker deadpanned. "It's not something you can help with."
"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Horizon asked with concern.
"I am certain it won't do me any good. I'm probably just overreacting," Seeker said as he took a sip and pouted. "Ugh, the coffee here tastes funny."
"That's because it's tea, you wazzik. Turns out we ran out of coffee and nopony saw fit to say anything," Horizon replied. "We really need to keep tabs on how much we use."
Seeker chuckled as he took a sip, "Still... tastes terrible."
Horizon chuckled, "What do you expect from a box of teabags that costs 15 bits?"
Once they finished their drinks, they sealed the observatory roof as the rain forecasted for the day was to last well into the night. The rain hit once it was lunchtime, drenching the streets, making Seeker and Joystick's regular meet-up next to impossible.
Since the rain persisted after Seeker's shift had ended, he borrowed an umbrella from one of his co-workers as they came into the observatory. He made a mental note to return the umbrella in the morning when he relieved the generous pony.
He arrived back at home and sealed his apartment up as usual. With a sigh as he laid on his cloud, Equestrian Earth came online and he 'woke up' in Old Ponyville's Broken Mare once more.
As he left the bar, he quickly opened up his Chat Scroll to message his adventuring partners. As he began to dictate to the scroll, he was interrupted by some crazed pony as he got tackled to the ground.
"Hey, Seeker!" The familiar voice of Joystick said cheerfully as he pulled his friend up to his hooves. "We didn't get to have our lunch today so I thought I'd make it up by-"
"-tackling me like a hoofball player?" Seeker replied with a raised eyebrow. "You are so random, Joystick."
"I know! Isn't it nice?" Joystick said with a grin.
Seeker rolled his eyes and softly chuckled. "I guess it cures the boredom of everyday life. Where are the others?"
"Well, Solace and Mixer won't be on till a little later. Real life and all that, you know how it is. As for Illusion -" Joystick's expression fell a little "- she doesn't respond to any of my messages. I think she's still got a few trust issues."
Seeker nodded his head in agreement, "Could you blame her? You know what she is, not to mention the last time we were on... it was just... well, weird."
"About the ruckus we had with Rufus and Fate's Fortune?" Joystick asked, Seeker nodded his head once again, "I know... I've been thinking about that too. I just don't understand what Vinyl was talking about. 'I think you five were the target?' All we did was accept a simple-sounding challenge and yet we got... this.
"I don't know, Seeker. I barely slept last night just thinking about it," Joystick said. Seeker knew that despite his friend's happy-go-lucky attitude, he could become quite a deep thinker when his jimmies got rustled enough. "Seeker... we need to figure this out but we have nothing to go on."
Seeker shook his head, "That may be but we can't truly worry about it right now. Let's just... focus on the game for now and see what happens, hm? We have nothing we can use to help track them and ask so maybe we should just let it be for now?"
Joystick chuckled, "Seeker, Voice of Reason for when there is none. Bringer of Insight for when we ha-"
"Oh shut it," Seeker said with a grin.
The pair began to walk through Old Ponyville. The olden town was always bursting with things to do. From 'collect X and bring to Y' and other forms of generic MMORPG quests, all the way to Races where players could bet or participate in if they were one of the appropriate species.
Players walked off in groups or alone as was their want. The game never punished a player for hoofing it alone but it was encouraged to join a guild and socialise with others from all over the world. It made the game far more enjoyable and worth the subscription fee.
"So what do you want to do, Seeker?" Joystick asked.
"I want to know something: -" Seeker stopped and looked directly at his friend "- are we going to go to this 'Dagger's Keep' now that we have a Crystal Key?"
"I think I'll put it up to a vote with the others. It's only fair since we all fought in our own way for the thing," Joystick replied.
"Understandable," Seeker said coolly. "What is in this 'Dagger's Keep' anyway?"
Joystick and Seeker stopped outside a small herbalist's shop, sitting on one of the benches that littered the Market Square area. The oaken, worn bench creaked under their weight as they sat. It wasn't going to break but the sound effect added to the game's realism.
"I've played several RPGs so I'm guessing a ton of monsters and plenty of loot," Joystick said thoughtfully, "I expect we'll need to make sure we're stocked up on everything before moving out for it."
"There you are!" A voice cried out, grabbing their attention.
Solace was walking towards the group with a massive grin on his face as usual. The Pegasus seemed to be the same as he was before he drank himself into a virtual stupor if the way he walked was any indication.
"Solace, great to see you made it. Feeling better?" Joystick asked, grinning a little.
"It'll take more than a little drinking contest to keep me down!" Solace replied with great enthusiasm. "So what are you two doing just sitting around?"
"Waiting for you, Mixer and Illusion of course so we can decide on our next objective," Seeker said this time, looking at Solace with a small grin.
"Right, right. Well, I'm here so we just need the other two then?" Solace asked.
"One more," A cool voice said, directing attention away from the grey Pegasus.
"Illusion!" Joystick said with a massive grin, "So nice of you to join us!"
"Make no mistake, I am merely here to see this through to the end. The moment this... disturbing issue has been resolved, consider me gone." The Changeling showed little care in her voice as she spoke. "Now we wait for Mixer..."
"That we do but I doubt he'll be too long," Solace said. "He's nothing if not punctual."
"That and he wastes little time getting under your fur," Seeker pointed out.
Solace shrugged with his usual smile on his face, "We both do that, and it's all in good fun so I don't see a problem."
Illusion chose to say nothing at this point, knowing it would end up as a full blown argument and she was not in the mood.
"So... When's Mixer getting here, Solace?" Joystick asked.
"He's over there," Illusion stated, directing everypony's attention to the far side of the Market Square.
The Crystal Mage's armour clanged a little as he walked up to the group while they walked towards him. They all met about halfway, near a Blacksmith where an NPC was happily hammering away on some generic weapon and a miscellaneous shop.
"Hey, Mixer. How are you?" Joystick asked as Solace beamed happily. Illusion merely muttered a small greeting while Seeker was more enthusiastic to his new friend.
"I am fine despite recent events," Mixer replied flatly. "We're all together then?"
"That we are. I've been wondering if we should try out that Crystal Key and get into Dagger's Keep," Joystick stated.
"Fine," Mixer deadpanned.
"Sounds good to me," Solace said.
"I'm here to see this to the end and if this 'Dagger's Keep' will yield answers then I am coming along as well," Illusion said flatly.
"And I'm coming too. Got to keep you from getting in over your head," Seeker sighed, a small smirk on his face as he mostly addressed Joystick with his statement.
Joystick chuckled as he pulled out his map while the others did the same. They all sat down on their haunches with their maps in front of them on the floor while the magically inclined members levitated them which meant Solace's map was the only one in the dirt.
"Alright. If I recall correctly, Dagger's Keep is... here," Joystick's magic aura made a series of small circles around the point he could recall on Rufus' map back in the Broken Mare. "We are still here in Old Ponyville so what we are going to do is simple: fight our way to the dungeon, go in, kill what's inside and claim our reward."
"Can't we just catch a Zeppelin or use some form of teleporting mechanic to get there?" Seeker asked.
"No," Illusion responded almost instantly.
"The game doesn't work that way, Seeker. Dungeons - special or otherwise - are not some instant travel location as that kills the whole 'adventure' shtick. And that is the point of the game," Joystick said. "Fight it, beat it and reap the spoils."
"At least it's not Zebrican Hunter Tri's motto of 'kill it, clean it, wear it,'" Seeker commented, shivering a little.
"Maybe, but the principle is the same in every RPG. Get better stuff by killing tougher things," Joystick said.
"And in Crystal Dungeons, they are a lot tougher. Even if we are at the same level as the target, it still makes teamwork paramount," Illusion said.
"How do you know that?" Seeker asked.
"I read the forums," She replied.
"Makes sense. Shall we crack on then?" Joystick said, addressing the group.
The adventurers looked to one another, nodding in agreement as the maps were returned to their respective owners' inventory. As they got up to venture forth, a familiar voice shouted loudly in their general direction.
"Yo! Retribution!" They all turned their heads, looking at the source who turned out to be Vinyl Scratch. "What you all up to in the middle of Old Ponyville?"
"We were just about to venture out to Dagger's Keep," Joystick replied with a smile.
"Well, good luck to you then. If that key works, give me a [color= plum]Private Message," She said, removing her glasses slightly, enough to reveal her eyes. "We could have a problem if hackers are making items that can fool the system."
"If it does work, are you going to take what we get?" Seeker asked.
Vinyl giggled for a few moments before erupting in uproarious laughter. The group just looked at each other before looking back at her, "Nah man! If you're going through all this trouble, I couldn't do that! Neon would have my tail." She calmed down, wiping a tear from her eye and fixing her glasses.
Mixer rolled his eyes, "Right..."
"Go and find out if it works. If it doesn't, tell me anyway. I'll make it worth your while," Vinyl said with a smirk. "Think of it as an 'unofficial quest.' Oh and here, take this. Just so that you know I'm serious."
She gave the group an assortment of potions and gave the Bow Gun wielding adventurers three oddly designed boxes. Seeker recognised them as Bow Gun magazines. One was a deep red with orange and faint blue colours, stylised to look like a towering inferno. Another one was pale blue and silver, looking like the crest of a giant wave. The last one was grey and white, resembling an overcast sky.
Items Acquired!
x1 Aero Magazine D-Grade
x1 Hellfire Magazine D-Grade
x1 Hydro magazine D-Grade
x5 Medium Health potion
x5 Medium Mana potion
"Uh, thanks?" Seeker said, a little uncertain as he checked them in his inventory.
"Load 'em and watch the fireworks," Vinyl said with a massive grin before turning around and walking down the street. "Catch you on the rebound!"
"What a strange mare," Seeker commented.
The group nodded slowly in unison, except for Joystick and Solace who merely smiled.
"She seems fine to me," Joystick said. "Let's go, we have a Keep to get to."
The group turned towards the general direction of the entrance to the Everfree Forest. Seeker had been looking over the three magazines he had received. As the group walked, he pulled out his Bow Gun and ejected the generic Normal Magazine. He picked it up with his magic and placed it into his inventory before inserting the Aero Magazine and pulling back on the bolt to load the first round.
His Potshot vanished instantly, replacing itself with Tornado with the number six attached to the bottom right of the icon.
Tornado - D
Each shot generates a vortex of air to disorientate and confuse enemies. Damage dealt is equal to a standard round of similar grade.
Ability has limited number of shots.
Curious, Seeker ejected the magazine to see what the other new magazines did. Each time he inserted the magazine, the Potshot ability would be replaced by a different, element-based skill with a different number in the corner.
Fire Vortex - D
Turns weapon into a flamethrower to deal fire damage at short range. Damage dealt is equal to 10% of a standard magazine of similar grade. Deals damage over time equal to damage dealt.
Tsunami - D
Drains the entire magazine to create a wave of water, dealing both damage and knockback upon impact. Damage is equal to maximum capacity of magazine multiplied by the maximum damage dealt by a standard round of similar grade.
Seeker was too busy looking at his changing skillset as he failed to realise the group had arrived at the entrance to the Everfree Forest. He ejected the magazine and inserted his Normal Magazine, turning his skill back to its stock form.
"Is everypony ready? Bladders drained, weapons ready and all that good stuff?" Joystick asked. The group nodded their heads. "Then let's do this!"
The group ventured into the maze of trees that was the Everfree Forest. The odd Green Timberwolf came out but was quickly dispatched by one of the adventurers with either a well placed shot or blade.
The journey was going relatively smooth until they reached one of the larger clearings in the forest. In the middle of the clearing, staring back at them as they drew closer, were three Manticores. They stood on their hind legs with their red, bat-like wings flaring as the creatures roared at the group, making them cringe.
"Divide and conquer!" Joystick shouted as the group dispersed to divide the Manticores' attention.
Seeker and Illusion buzzed to the right, drawing one of the Manticores while Joystick used his Shining Beacon ability to keep another one's focus on him as he charged straight towards it. Solace and Mixer went left, drawing the attention of the remaining Manticore.
As their targets drew nearer, Seeker's HUD displayed slightly more information on the Manticore. It showed Manticore Lv8 hovering about its head as it brought its claws down on Seeker.
The Changeling dodged it and buzzed backwards, pulling the bolt back on his Bow Gun and firing a normal shot. The round impacted against the Manticore's head, making it recoil slightly and only serving to anger the virtual beast further.
Illusion used Terminal Velocity to get between Seeker and the angry Manticore and began to slash at it with her blades. The beast roared in anger and pain as Illusion kept up her assault until the effects of Terminal Velocity waned.
As they did, Seeker aimed at the barrel of his Bow Gun at his target and activated Potshot. The Gun recoiled hard into his shoulder as the round ejected from the barrel at high speed before colliding with the Manticore's torso. The beast howled as its health reached zero, forcing it to collapse to the ground with a thud, ready for looting.
As they had been fighting their target, Solace and Mixer were having an easier time with theirs. Using Hinder to slow the Manticore down while Solace fired heavy round upon heavy round from his Bow Gun, taking out his target's health fraction by fraction.
Solace ejected his Normal Magazine and inserted a Hellfire Magazine. His standard skill changed, showing a phoenix covered beak to tail-feathers in flames in place of the standard icon with the number three in the bottom right corner.
Phoenix's Fire
Fires a flaming round in the form of a phoenix, homing in on a single target and burning it for a duration.
Damage dealt is equal to a standard round of similar grade over five seconds.
With a press of a trigger, he activated the special round in the chamber and the round fired, blazing a small trail as the animated phoenix flew from the barrel. It collided with the Manticore, igniting its fur and making it howl in pain. The Manticore still went after Mixer, its claws raised high in the air as it was about to try and crush him.
Mixer retaliated with Fortress, making his attacker stop attacking at its claws collided with the topaz wall. The Manticore shifted focus to the wall and began to tear at it with its claws, witling the health of the wall down with each strike.
Solace and Mixer wasted no time as Mixer's Crystal Storm ability came down at it while Solace fired another Phoenix's Fire. Their attacks killed off their target, making it collapse in a heap. The pair exchanged a grin as they took their spoils.
Joystick grunted as his shield met his target's claws, making him move backwards a little. His Shining Beacon ability was still active, draining his mana at a constant steady rate as he battled the Manticore one-on-one. He lunged with his shortsword, aiming to stab his target in the chest. Sadly he got the backend of the Manticore's tail.
Joystick fell onto the floor, rolling twice before getting onto his hooves and charging again. He was nothing if not highly persistent. The Paladin placed his weapons away and charged full force into the Manticore. He bowled the beast over and quickly unsheathed his weapons.
His blade met the slightly disoriented Manticore's torso as Joystick slashed at it. The beast roared and got up too quickly for Joystick's liking and roared, making him cover his ears. As the chimeric monster was about to capitalise on Joystick's reaction, two loud bangs rang through the clearing. The beast fell to the ground with a thump.
"Thanks guys," Joystick said as he looted the corpse for money.
Seeker pulled back on his Bow Gun's bolt and manually ejected the spent casing as Solace did the same with his heavier rifle. Seeker folded the weapon up and placed it on his back as he and Illusion rejoined their leader.
"Someone's gotta keep an eye on you," Seeker reiterated.
Level up!
Joystick Lv9!
Shining Beacon lv2
Increases damage resistance by 1.5% of combined armour rating and forces close monsters of lower level to attack user, ignoring others.
Next level: damage resistance 1.75% of combined armour rating.
Solace lv8!
Ricochet gained!
Fire a round that bounces off surfaces and targets, dealing less damage with each hit.
Bounces three times, dealing full, standard damage on the first hit and 25% on the last.
Next level: bounces four times.
Mixer lv9!
Fortress lv2
Create a wall of topaz in front of the caster to protect him/her.
Current health: 230
Next level: 290
Secondary function Entrapment surrounds a single target with transparent crystals.
Current health: 340
Next level: 400
Seeker lv6!
High Impact Shot gained!
Fires an explosive round, dealing damage in a small radius around target.
Deals x2 damage of currently equipped weapon.
Next level: increases effective blast radius by 0.2%
Illusion lv8!
Terminal Velocity lv2!
Increases movement speed and attack rate by 50% for 6 seconds.
Next level: duration of ability lasts for 7 seconds.
"Now, how far are we to our destination?" Illusion inquired, ignoring her level up while the others smiled a little for getting more than 23 bits from their previous looting.
"Well we sh- oh, rhetorical I gather," Seeker replied as Illusion pulled out her map.
"This clearing should be... here," Illusion said, tapping a clearing with her hoof. "That means Dagger's Keep is... there." This was again followed by another tap where the aforementioned tower stood.
"Let's get going then," Mixer said quickly, looking down on of the paths through the forest. "As much as entertaining constantly reappearing Manticores sounds like fun, we don't have the provisions to do that as well as raid a Crystal Dungeon."
"Mixer's right. That way," Joystick said as the group picked up their pace, and sprinted as three new Manticores appeared in the clearing, waiting for the next adventurer to happen upon them.
The Everfree Forest began to get darker as the group continued to venture towards the Dagger's Keep. Due to their paranoia, the group found the Changelings had their weapons out and at the ready, held in the air with their magic as they kept close.
Changelings always have an innate fear when alone or in low numbers. It was what brought upon their shapeshifting, both as a method for getting closer to prey and to confuse any attackers. Seeker held his breath as the group broke through some foliage and stood before an aging tower.
Years of wear and neglect were evident even from the moment the group laid eyes on Dagger's Keep. The stone was worn, vines and moss grew along the sides with some hanging out from a broken window akin to a window box flower. The main door was as ancient as the Keep, the oaken finish worn and riddled with holes as if chewed through by large termites.
Yet the door in question held firm, a large translucent crystal lock was hanging in the centre by similar chains in the doorframe. Apart from the tower itself, there was little else around other than the local flora and a rock that could be mined with a pickaxe for some crafting materials.
"Okay, let's find out of we went all this way for nothing," Joystick said, walking up to the lock and turned the key.
Nothing happened, the key stopped turning a few degrees and appeared to get stuck. Joystick tried to wiggle it in the lock to no avail. Solace chuckled as their illustrious leader fell on his flank trying to pull it out with his hooves when his magic failed.
"Looks like it couldn't fool a Crystal Lock," Mixer commented.
"I never would have guessed," Illusion replied curtly as she rolled her eyes, keeping her eyes on the underbrush with Seeker.
"Well, that was a total loss..." Joystick said sadly. "On the bright side, we did level up so the journey wasn't a total loss."
Seeker hefted his rifle against his shoulder as he looked to Joystick. "Yeah, that's true."
The group voiced their agreement as they began to walk away. "Vinyl will be pleased to know the game wasn't entirely fooled."
"Agreed, Solace," Illusion said. "I would have enjoyed the prospect of-" The ground rumbled a little. "-please tell me that was your stomach growling..."
The group shook their heads and unsheathed their weapons, looking around in case something exceptionally large was coming. Another rumble made a few of them stagger and Seeker had to use the rifle butt to steady himself.
"Where is it coming from?" Mixer asked.
"The ground?" Solace replied helpfully.
"Your powers of observation are frighteningly sharp," Illusion said callously.
"You asked. It's not Solace's fault," Seeker softly rebuked.
"Ugh... I guess so," Illusion said, muttering under her breath.
The ground stopped rumbling after a few seconds, allowing the group to gather their wits. A loud noise - akin to the sound of shattering glass - rang out through the forest. The group looked at each other before looking at the door to the Dagger's Keep.
"No... bucking way..." Seeker said softly, in a tone barely audible to anyone other than Illusion who silently nodded her own disbelief.
One of the Crystal Lock's chains had shattered and what laid on the floor below was a heap of shiny fragments. Another chain shattered spontaneously in front of the group, falling to the ground in a similar pile.
The last two fell as well, faster than the first and second chains and left the Crystal Lock itself on the door. It seemed to just hang there, unsupported by anything until it and the Crystal Key itself shattered in unison, clattering to the ground.
Joystick walked up to the door and gently pushed it. The door fell off its hinges the moment his hoof made contact, clattering to the ground and making the group cringe.
The room before them was a maze of broken weapon racks, tables and something resembling a chair. As they entered, a cold chill ran up their spines as a freezing wind blew through the dungeon. Some of the masonry work had fallen inside, leaving more rubble strewn across the floor. Each step had to be careful lest they upset it.
It was a moot point for the Changelings and Solace who simply hovered in place but found even that difficult thanks to the poor air circulation in the room.
"Well" - Joystick said as he looked to the caved in staircase - "we aren't taking the stairs up, that's for sure."
A torn rug in the centre of the room caught their attention as Solace, Seeker and Illusion pulled on the rings that were attached to a large, old-looking trap door. Joystick and Mixer helped by grabbing the last two rings and pulling with their magic. In a few hard heaves, the door opened and clattered against the floor, almost hitting the Unicorns as they evaded it just in time.
The trapdoor revealed a dark passage that lit up thanks to the wall mounted torches as they glowed with a deep purple flame. Joystick looked to his friends as they all checked their inventory and nodded at him.
Joystick smiled broadly as he looked back down at the staircase, pulling out his sword and shield. "LEEEROY JEENKIIINS!!" |
Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War | Things That Go Bump In The Dungeon | Equestrian Earth: The Changeling War
Things That Go Bump In The Dungeon
Author: Draconis187
Best read in Dark Mode. Several bright text colours are used.
The term 'dungeon' in a role-playing game has two definitions but both are interconnected. Definition one calls a dungeon a dark, dingy network of brick-lined tunnels with the odd, wrought-iron cell bars, skeletons belonging to the ones who have 'perished' before the current hero - or in this case heroes - arrived. Old sconces, torches or some other light source being their only illumination save for the one game-savvy player who brought their own or possessed a spell to negate the need for said item.
Definition two states a dungeon as a self-contained area within the game with enemies and a single main goal. Treasure chests to be found and a single big 'baddie' at the end to justify the hours or minutes spent running around and nearly seeing your character bite the dust multiple times. The scenery could be a jungle, an oasis or even definition one. Another term for this definition is called a 'sandbox.'
The dungeon the party found themselves traversing mainly fell into definition one. Some of the walls either had or were giving away, the roots of some unknown plant forcing them apart and creating a small pile of fallen brickwork to pile up on the floor below while the cause of the rest of the rubble was from some unknown elements or something else strong enough to break through the thick walls.
Seeker could smell the decay coming from a nearby corpse that had been run through by a lance and impaled against the wall. The group's hooves trotted across the passageway, their weapons making contact with their moving bodies, giving off soft clinking sounds. The crackling fires of the burning torches were the only other sounds Seeker could make out and it sent shivers down his spine.
Illusion looked as if she had been in dungeons all her life as she ignored the very things that put him on edge. Joystick merrily hummed a small tune as he took point with Illusion not far behind. Mixer, Solace and Seeker made up the rear of the formation with Mixer just ahead.
And to make matters worse for Seeker's nerves, the torches burned something that made the resulting flames turn purple instead of the usual orange/red colour. It still behaved like regular fire though but Seeker just couldn't ease up at the colour, no matter how many torches the party passed.
The general ambience of the dungeon was foreboding, and gave a sense as if something could jump out at them at any moment. They had no map of Dagger's Keep which meant they had to play it by ear. Luckily if their characters expired, they would reappear just inside the entrance they used but it meant they would have to run back to rejoin the party.
Seeker's ears perked up, his body tensing as a small snap echoed through the passageway. "What was that?"
Solace looked at him and then chuckled softly as his eyes set down at the Changeling's hoof, "Look down."
The Changeling Engineer did so and yelped, jumping to the side as he found the source was a snapped bone from some unidentifiable skeleton. Joystick and Solace chuckled at the Changeling's rather nervous behaviour. Illusion shook her head, as if slightly disappointed in her own kind while Mixer rolled his eyes.
The passageway finally opened up into a massive hemisphere-shaped chamber with several old, worn pillars with many of them already crumbling. It had a very gothic-styled chandelier hanging in the room's centre, acting as the only source of ambient light. Charcoal-black braziers were scattered around the room, laying in various positions as if they had been knocked over by something. They were of a similar style to the chandelier, metal spikes sticking out in all directions which would make any interior decorator question their practicality.
"Scary looking main hall, check," Illusion remarked in a sarcastic, if not slightly disappointed, tone.
"And empty too," Mixer added, looking around. "I thought there'd be more monsters or something. What a wasted effort this was after all the hype you get about these places. Not so special by the looks of things."
"Must be waiting in the shadows, cliche much?" Illusion added flatly as she surveyed the room, keeping her eyes sharp for any signs of trouble. "Regardless, we should remain on guard for anything suspicious. There is no telling what may be waiting to pounce on us."
As the group made its way to the centre of the chamber, the lights around them went out simultaneously, blown out by an unknown source. Seeker gave a small yelp in shock while the more seasoned players got ready to defend themselves.
There was no sound in the dark for several moments, save for the party's own breathing. Solace kept his Bow Gun raised, the stock pressing against his shoulder, ready to unleash one of his abilities at the first opening he got.
Illusion stood on her hind hooves with her swords in her forehooves while her ears flicked in nearly every direction she could make them turn, trying to make out the faintest sound. She was listening for the slightest sound, her stony gaze scanning the dark room for any movement belonging to neither of the ponies she decided to join on the adventure.
Seeker was shaking just a bit as he had his Bow Gun out, feverishly looking at his surroundings for movement. His trigger hoof was twitchy out of sheer panic as he kept trying to calm himself down.
'It's just a game, it's just a game,' He chanted in his mind but it had little effect as his heart felt like it was going to leap out of his carapace and do the Macarena for all to see and laugh at.
Mixer had his staff in his forehooves and took slow, deep breaths as he waited for the anything hostile to unleash his magic on. Joystick was smiling, his heart racing but instead of fear, it was out of sheer excitement and anticipation. Adrenaline was rushing through him, his sword out of its scabbard and his shield in his other hoof.
The silence was interrupted by a multitude of scraping claws on the stonework that was out of the group's view, they moved quite rapidly across the hard surfaces, almost gliding along it as the multiple sources got steadily closer. The torches erupted in blue flame, illuminating the chamber once again and allowing the party to gaze upon their hosts.
But nothing was there. The chamber was as empty as when they entered, save for the blue flame that now burned all around. Seeker's eyes widened as a realisation hit him: there were no torches on the walls when they walked in, just the chandelier which was no longer hanging above them. The knocked over braziers were also missing from the room's decor.
"Something's not right," Seeker muttered, just loud enough for the group to hear him. "The torches... they weren't here before. The chandelier and braziers are gone too..." The rest of the party looked up and saw that the chandelier had indeed disappeared.
Solace let out a low whistle, "Damn... some special effects they got in these dungeons, am I right?"
Joystick nodded, smiling, "Now I see why the Crystal Dungeons and their keys are so rare. They bring the creepy."
The room gave a very low rumble, the dust above them shaking loose and falling all around them. The rumbling and shaking was not strong enough to cause even Seeker to lose his hoofing and fall. Two sections of the wall receded and slid down into the ground, revealing two passageways on opposite sides of the chamber wich led to Celestia knows where.
Mixer was the first to pipe up about the change and felt it prudent to point out the obvious to everypony, "It appears we have two different passages with no clear way of knowing where they will lead us to."
Seeker looked at Joystick, shaking his head as his unicorn friend began to smile wider and wider to the point it made the Paladin look unsettling, 'Please don't say spli-'
"Split up!" Joystick cried out happily.
'Super facehoof authorised. Engage,' Seeker thought as he facehoofed with quite a bit of force that would have given him a black eye in reality but the game settled for taking a tiny amount of his health instead.
Illusion just looked at the white Paladin as if he just said the stupidest thing known to Changeling kind, "And why, pray tell, in Tartarus would we even consider that option when we are in a dungeon meant to promote teamwork?"
"Aw, come on. We'll cover more ground that way and if we find ourselves in a fight that is too tough for us we can simply make a strategic retreat back to this chamber and go down the other passageway," Joystick responded.
Illusion simply rolled her eyes, "Fine."
"Awesome! Seeker, take Illusion with you down that passage to the right of the room while Mixer, Solace and I take the left passageway. Sound good?" Joystick said, looking at his friend with his unwavering smile.
"Alright but if I find whatever made those sounds, I'm hightailing it back here," Seeker responded. "Something about it just... I don't know. It just unnerved me."
"That's just the game doing what it does best. Making you squirm," Joystick responded.
"You get used to it, Seeker. We were all noobs once," Solace reassured.
"I guess," Seeker said as he rubbed the back of his head with a forehoof.
"Seeker. Move!" Illusion called out, making him jump a little bit as her voice reverberated across the chamber as she stood at the entryway of the right passageway.
"C-coming!" Seeker half-shouted before putting his Bow Gun away and running across the chamber towards Illusion. Joystick and Solace gave the pair of Changelings a wave before walking towards the left passageway.
Mixer looked at Illusion and nodded his head at her, "Be careful and choose your fights carefully. If you do that, you will do fine."
Illusion nodded curtly before walking into the passageway with Seeker, carrying his Bow Gun in his magic so that he did not have to unfold it when, not if, they got into trouble.
The passageway the two went into was hewn from the same stone as the chamber they had left. Seeker's ears perked up as he heard something new, something he never thought he would be hearing down in the dungeons: humming. Cheerful humming permeated the air, making the small hairs on the back of Seeker's neck stand on end. Seeker nearly jumped into the nearby wall when the source looked at him and stopped humming.
"Seeker, calm down. This is just a game. It can't truly harm you," Illusion said, her tone so friendly it was like he was talking to an entirely different Changeling.
"I-Illusion?" Seeker spoke in a half-whisper, completely in disbelief.
Illusion rolled her eyes, "Yes, me. What of it? My name antagonise you in some manner?"
"Why... why are you humming? I never pegged you for the... cheerful type," Seeker said, speaking slowly and trying to pick his words as carefully as possible.
"Because I gave those clouts a different Changeling," Illusion said with a small smile as the pair turned a corner, continuing to follow the passageway, ignoring the soft dripping of water nearby. "Do you honestly believe I would let them know my true nature?"
"No... I guess not," Seeker responded thoughtfully, "I admit you had me fooled too. I thought you were such an unfeeling hardass of a female."
Illusion shook her head, "That was the point. If you weren't convinced, the rest would have noticed. Especially Mixer. He does not seem to be an easy unicorn to fool but hopefully he can be dissuaded from trying to expose me."
"He does give that impression," Seeker said as the pair stopped walking entirely, "But he is a good pony, trust me."
"You I trust. The others I do not," Illusion responded, giving Seeker a serious look, "I trust my own kind and nopony else."
"Well, you can trust Joystick. He's a good friend of mine," Seeker said with a small smile, "He even knows what I am. What I really am."
Seeker's vision became a small blur as he found himself flying through the air, colliding with the nearby wall, making him utter a small shout of pain. Illusion's blades were pressed against his neck. The Changeling gave him the look of pure venom, as if ready to slice his head straight off.
"Are you out of your mind?!" Illusion shouted in fury. "You have any idea what that could mean for your hive?!"
Seeker took a few moments to get his bearings before he responded, "I left my hive ages ago. And besides, I wouldn't rat out their location or any other sensitive information. Then again I wasn't privy to information like that anyway so it wouldn't have mattered."
Illusion's eyes widened a little and she let him down, sheathing her blades, "You... you left your hive? Why?"
"I just... wanted to see the world without having to constantly tread on eggshells," Seeker responded, rubbing his neck a little, "I go into a city or town, stay for a bit, make friends and then complete my assignment. After that I have to go. I got tired of it. I wanted somewhere to live permanently and live out the rest of my life. Even if it meant I had to remain in disguise every time I went out."
Illusion just listened and nodded her head, "In the hive we are all expected to do our part to keep our kin alive, even if it meant our deaths or the deaths of the ponies too. I do understand your reasons for leaving even if I do not agree with it."
"Thank you," Seeker said with a very small smile on his face. "What about you? Are you still with your hive or on your own like me?"
Illusion smirked and started walking again, "Now now, Seeker. I can't tell you everything about me. Where would the mystery be if I didn't leave you guessing?"
"But-" Seeker started to say as he followed Illusion, only to be cut off by the tip of one of Illusion's blades as it pointed at his horn.
"End of discussion," Illusion replied coolly, "Maybe one day I'll tell you everything about me. Maybe."
Seeker gave a sigh, nodding his head as he conceded the discussion, "Alright."
Illusion sheathed her blade, giving the Engineer a small smile, "Good bug. Now come on, race you to the end of this tunnel."
Illusion did not wait for a response as she instantly charged off at full gallop, looking back at Seeker if only to either coax or tease him into following her.
Seeker was slightly taken aback by Illusion's running but began to give chase, his Bow Gun levitating beside him as the pair's hoofsteps echoed through the passageway.
The Changelings managed to sprint the entire length of the passage without too much difficulty, they only had to stop to refill their stamina bars once before making the last push to the end.
What awaited them at the end was another large room, in the same design as the original room that somehow had been replaced by the one with the blue torches. A large chandelier hung from the ceiling, glowing softly from the fires that burnt from its many candles. The braziers were stood upright and burned as well with the same blue fire.
"Uh... isn't this the room that we were all in just now?" Seeker asked, looking around to try and find any differences to contradict his assumption.
Illusions looked around as well, walking off to the far side of the room, where another passageway stood. Everything around them was identical to the room they had left, making the Changelings rack their brains.
Illusion turned around to look at Seeker, "It certainly seems like-" Illusion stopped speaking as an ear-splitting shriek pierced the relative silence, making her and Seeker cover their ears with their hooves.
The shriek even made Seeker drop his Bow Gun, the clattering sound drowned out by the unnatural wail that reverberated around the room, the noise enough to deafen anypony with moderately sensitive hearing.
The shriek was joined by several others, the source coming from the shadows around them. Both Changelings were laid on the floor, pressing their hooves harder against their ears to try stop the sound from destroying their hearing.
After three gruelling seconds of ear-splitting anguish, the sound stopped. Seeker let out a long breath of air as he got to his hooves but his ears rang for another five seconds, an after effect of the torture he and Illusion had just endured.
Before the Changelings could collect their bearings and figure out what just happened, the earlier skittering noises they heard heard in the first chamber came back in full force as four large creatures quickly stepped out of the shadows, finally revealing the source of the noises and shrieks.
Their thin, sleek, long bodies were covered in stone-grey scales with a very matte sheen. Three stood on all fours while one was standing tall on its hind legs, towering over the Changelings. Their snouts tapered to a fine point; all of them showing their small, pale yellow, needle-like teeth.
Seeker could make out they possessed three rows of said teeth as they observed the group in silence. Their front claws were rather thin with six inch long, jet-black talons. Their eyes had milky white sclera with light green pupils that stared at the Changelings without a single blink.
They each possessed a single tail, tapering to an arrowhead point at the end. But their most distinguishing feature was the fire that ran from the top of their heads to halfway down their tails.
A purple flame, identical to what burnt inside one of the previous rooms, burned fiercely on their bodies but they seemed to be unaffected by it no matter how hot it seemed to burn. Hovering above them were the words Pyrelurker lv9.
Illusion pulled out her blades and looked at Seeker, "Come on then, help me take these out!"
Without waiting for an answer, Illusion charged the closest Pyrelurker with great speed as she activated her Terminal Velocity ability. Her blades clanged as the metal collided with her target's claws as it intercepted her attack.
She quickly realised that while their bodies looked like they were covered in scales, they were actually animated figures composed of stone. They were fighting statues with an attitude problem.
"Seeker!" Illusion shouted as she began to wrestle her blades from the Pyrelurker's claws. The response she received was a loud bang so loud the dust from the ceiling above was shaken which was followed by an even louder explosion, knocking her and the attacking Pyrelurker apart as well as sending the remaining three back a ways.
The barrel of Seeker's Bow Gun was smoking from having used High Impact Shot. The round had collided with a nearby Pyrelurker and created the resulting explosion. Illusion had been flung backwards, her blades not only severed from the Pyrelurker's grip but her own as well.
"Seeker you idiot!" Illusion reprimanded as she quickly got to her hooves, picking up her swords, "Next time warn me if you feel like charring my carapace!"
Seeker's ears pinned back slightly as he adjusted his grip on the Bow Gun, "S-sorry Illusion. I couldn't think of any other ability that would help."
Illusion rolled her eyes, "Whatever, you're forgiven because you're kin. This time. Next I'll be sure to return the favour. Let's get out of here, I don't like our odds."
"Don't have to tell me twice!" Seeker replied as he turned around to run back through the way they came but found himself pulled backwards, making him yelp in surprise.
Illusion had activated her Terminal Velocity ability and charged for the door on the north side of the chamber, the four Pyrelurkers in hot pursuit. Purple flames flew past them as they used their Will o' Wisp ability. One grazed Seeker's side, taking a sizable chunk of his health with it.
"By the hive, why did it take that much?!" Seeker half-shrieked as he ran beside Illusion.
"It's because in these dungeons, enemies are stronger and more durable," Illusion replied matter-of-factly, "It pains me to admit but we can not engage them without the other three. Or any other foes for that matter."
"Then why did you agree to split up then?" Seeker responded as they passed the threshold of the northern passage.
Behind them, the Pyrelurkers shrieked, stopping just behind the threshold, showing their teeth and sharp talons. The Changelings looked back and sat down as their attackers refused to pursue them any further.
"I thought it would have been a good idea to just be with another Changeling," Illusion said as she moved a lock of her mane behind her head, "Assignments get a little lonely when you're alone."
Seeker's eyes widened a little bit, "You're on an assignment? You're an infiltrator like I was?"
Illusion sighed and nodded, "Yes, dimwit. I come here to relieve some stress from out there and maybe have a little fun on the side. Finding out there was another real Changeling here was a bonus."
"Right..." Seeker replied, sighing softly.
"What? Expecting me to be a runaway like yourself?" Illusion said with a snide smile, "Sorry to disappoint you."
"Yeah, you're right. Should have known better," Seeker replied with a somewhat sad tone to his voice.
"Luckily these creatures are territorial," She said, looking back as the Pyrelurkers abandoned them, "Never seen them before. They must have come from the expansion."
"I haven't played this all that long so I guess you're right. Unless they're exclusive to these dungeons," Seeker replied.
Illusion shook her head, "No, they're not exclusive. I've read the leaks, the previews, everything about these dungeons and they have never popped up. This would have a unique boss but the possibility of unique enemies is not so high."
"Alright. So what's the plan?" Seeker asked.
"Well, we have two options. Option one is us running back through there and rejoining the rest of the party. The other is going through here to see where leads," Illusion responded as she began to stand up.
Seeker got up as well, nodding his head, "Alright. I'm guessing we're springing for option two then?"
Illusion smirked, "Can't let those ponies hog all the glory."
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Joystick took point as usual with Mixer and Solace walking not too far behind him. Their armoured hooves echoed slightly through the passageway as they looked around themselves.
"So why let them go together?" Mixer asked, looking directly at Joystick.
"Oh don't you see the potential for romance?" Joystick replied wistfully, smiling as if knowing more than he was letting on.
"Romance? In a game where you may not truly know who your companions true identities are?" Mixer questioned.
"Well, they do seem to have some form of connection," Solace said with a grin, "Don't tell me you at least saw how Illusion didn't give Seeker such an icy reception when we met for those matches against Fate's Fortune."
"And what was the purpose of that little cryptic message?" Mixer asked as they passed the threshold of the passageway, entering a new section of the dungeon. "It was a code, Solace. I'm pretty sure it was Changeling code."
"How can you be so sure it was Changeling code? Are you a Changeling? Do you listen out for Changeling codes in your spare time when you're not here like some old warhorse who thinks the government is out to get us all and rewrites our memories should we learn too much?" Joystick replied, looking at Mixer with a serious tone in his voice.
"Well, the-"
"For all we know, it could have been a code they made as foals who got separated years ago and this game helped them reconnect," Joystick interrupted, "Think of it as social networking for gamers."
"...I see your point, Joystick," Mixer replied, a little surprised that the young, carefree stallion just interrupted him.
"Try not to think too much about it, Mixer. Seriously, enjoy the game and the company of your friends," Solace said, still smiling.
Mixer rolled his eyes, "Alright alright. Fine I'll stop trying to analyse it."
Joystick nodded and smiled wide, his demeanour changing back to his usual happy attitude. Their ears perked a little as they felt something was very different in the area they had entered, pulling them away from their discussion and making them take notice at the task at hoof.
The ground was soft, unlike the stone they had been walking on. The sound of running water pierced their ears, coming from a small underground river just ahead of them, pooling into a spring and ending there. Soft, green grass laid underhoof, the source of the soft feeling on their hooves.
Various species of trees, some not native to the real world stood proudly around them. The canopies towered over the trio with a rocky ceiling beyond the trees' foliage.
"Huh... hidden grove? Anypony feel like they just got sucked into somepony's secret, forbidden lovestory?" Joystick murmured, looking around.
"Looks like, Joystick. Who would have thought there would be something like this in this dungeon?" Solace replied. "This is not your standard dungeon that's for sure."
"Be on your guard. Areas like these tend to be fraught with enemies. It's perfect for an ambush," Mixer said, his staff out and at the ready.
"Leave it to you to-ah?!" Solace replied but an ear-splitting shriek pierced the room, stopping him from finishing his sentence. He attempted to ask anypony able to hear him if they knew what was going on but the shriek was too loud, drowning him out.
"Told you!" Mixer shouted, his ears pressed against his head to try block out the shrieking.
"What, by Celestia's massive flank, is making this racket?!" Joystick shouted as he copied Mixer by covering his ears with his forehooves.
Two Pyrelurkers came out of the shadows amongst the treetops, the purple fires on their backs crackling and dancing about but it did not burn any of the trees they jumped down from or leave any mark. Their unnerving, unblinking eyes watched them in silence as if waiting for them to mate the first move.
Mixer rubbed his chin a little in though, "A new creature? Or is it just here?"
Joystick laughed and drew his sword and shield, "Who cares? It just means more fun for us because we don't know what it'll do! LEEEERROOOOY JEEEENKIIIINS!"
Joystick charged the closest Pyrelurker as it charged towards him in an effort to counter him. It leapt towards the Paladin as it utilised its Overpower ability. The attack connected and Joystick cried out as he was slammed to the ground, experiencing some whiplash as a result.
The first Pyrelurker began to claw at Joystick repeatedly, whittling down his health bit by bit as he was ferociously savaged by the animated, unholy animal statue. Mixer rolled to the side as a ball of purple flame flew past, almost immolating his tail.
The second Pyrelurker opted to use its Will o' Wisp ability to try and burn him. Solace aimed his Bow Gun and fired at the first Pyrelurker that was attacking Joystick, chipping its stone hide but his efforts did not deter the lively sculpture from its attack.
Joystick's health was getting lower with every blow but before it reached the halfway mark, the Pyrelurker headbutted him hard. The attack took out a larger portion of Joystick's health before the statue leapt off him and charged at Solace. As it got close it reared up onto its hindlegs and used Will o' Wisp.
"Whoa!" Solace shouted as he jumped to the side, landing on his side as a ball of purple flame flew past him. "That was hotter than the hinges on the gates of Tartarus!"
"I am sure their fire is greater due to the creatures' magical nature!" Mixer shouted as he used Crystal Storm on the second Pyrelurker.
Red crystals rained down on the stone automaton, taking a small amount of its health with each hit and interrupting its casting of Will o' Wisp.
Joystick grunted as he got up, drawing his weapon, "I'm fine thanks for asking..."
"Kind of busy at the moment!" Solace said as he jumped back, avoiding the claws of the second Pyrelurker as it nearly grazed his muzzle.
"I see that. I'm coming!" Joystick shouted as he activated Divinity's Light to heal a large portion of the damage he had sustained from the Pyrelurker.
He leapt at the Pyrelurker that was attacking Solace, using Shining Beacon to get its attention. His sword connected with the Pyrelurker's head, making a loud clang resonate through the grove and changing its focus to Joystick instead. It gave a shriek and swiped at Joystick only to be timely blocked by the Paladin's shield.
Although he had his shield raised and held his ground, every swipe of the Pyrelurker's claws made Joystick move back bit by bit, losing a tiny portion of health each time as the damage was being lessened by both the shield andShining Beacon.
This gave Solace some breathing room and he took aim, cocking the Bow Gun before pulling the trigger. The long range weapon fired, a small trail of smoke hissing from the barrel as soon as the round from the Normal Magazine took flight. The round slammed into the Pyrelurker's side, chipping it and making it cry out in response.
"Ha! It can be hurt!" Solace exclaimed.
"That's nice, now help me out here!" Mixer shouted as he slammed the pommel of his staff against the ground, using his Fortress ability to protect himself.
The first Pyrelurker clawed at the wall of crystals, shattering them piece by piece as it savagely tore at it with its long nails. Fragments of topaz flew from every connecting strike as the Pyrelurker tirelessly assaulted Mixer's defensive wall.
The statue was showing signs of wear and tear, pieces were chipped away and a part of its tail had been severed but it was undeterred, unaware or unconcerned at the state of its body.
"I got your back, Mixer. Let's try something new!" Solace responded as he changed targets, aiming for the first Pyrelurker and used his new Ricochet ability.
The heavy Bow Gun fired, the round smacking the first Pyrelurker in the lower jaw, taking a quarter of it off as the round rebounded off its stone hide with a short, high-pitched whining noise. The rebounding bullet changed targets, heading for the second Pyrelurker and then bounced off it, colliding with a poor Cyprus tree, becoming embedded in the bark.
The first Pyrelurker wailed as Mixer's staff connected with its head as it had forced the Crystal Mage to melee. It stood there for a second as cracks quickly formed all over its body, its trademark flame seeping out of them. The Pyrelurker then crumbled quickly, becoming a heap of burning rubble on the ground. The flames continued to burn but did not set the grass ablaze.
Mixer turned his attention to the second Pyrelurker and used Fortress to keep it away from Joystick. The Paladin used his Divinity's Light ability on himself to heal the damage he had been taking. Solace continued to fire at the Pyrelurker from a comfortable distance, chipping away at it.
"We have an appointment to keep, let's wrap this up with a nice, little bow!" Solace shouted as he loaded a Hellfire Magazine and used Phoenix's Fire, sending a bird of pure hellfire flying out of the end of the barrel.
The attack hit its mark and covered the Crystal Storm in flames. The attack seemed to do absolutely nothing as the statue did not even flinch. The flames began to shift colour from a healthy red/orange to an unholy purple. The three stallions looked in shock as the Pyrelurker's health was restored by an eighth.
"Oh, come on!" Joystick exclaimed, throwing his hooves up into the air.
"Less complaining, more hitting!" Mixer shouted as he used Crystal Storm, raining sharp rubies down on the Pyrelurker.
Joystick ran out from behind the topaz wall that Mixer had conjured up and leapt at the statue, swinging his sword hard. The blade connected with a resounding clang, the blade vibrating a little and making Joystick's hoof feel slightly numb. The Pyrelurker swiped at him, its claws connecting with Joystick's chest and sending him flying back a short distance.
Solace turned his head and watched his friend hit the ground hard but get back to his hooves again, "Joystick, you alright?!"
Joystick shook his head a little and readied himself as the Pyrelurker leapt at him, using Overpower.
"I think I'm starting to hate this dungeon!" Joystick exclaimed just before he was bowled over and pinned to the ground once more.
The Pyrelurker began to claw at him once again, tearing through his health bar despite the fact that his Shining Beacon ability was still active.
"If you can get this thing off me, it would be much appreciated!" Joystick shouted, grunting in pain as he was mauled with reckless abandon.
Mixer closed the distance between the attacking Pyrelurker and himself, charging with his staff held high. Solace continued to pelt the burning statue with standard Normal rounds since his Phoenix's Fire had a cooldown of about ten seconds.
Joystick continued to hold on as best he could, his health getting dangerously low. Just as the Pyrelurker was about to headbutt him, Mixer's staff found its mark: the side of the Pyrelurker's hard face. There was a sickening crack, as if the staff had broken but it had turned out to be the Pyrelurker, its body finally succumbing to the relentless attacks from the trio. It whined as it rolled off Joystick, its body cracking and falling apart until it joined its kin as a smouldering pile of burning rubble.
Mixer gave Joystick his hoof, helping the appreciative, white Unicorn up. "Thanks..."
Mixer nodded his head curtly, "It seems these dungeons are more dangerous than we could have expected."
Solace hefted his Bow Gun over his shoulder and walked up to the two Unicorns, "I'll say. I had no clue it would have absorbed the fire and heal itself."
"None of us expected that," Joystick replied with slight sarcasm in his tone as he began searching for a health potion in his inventory.
Joystick found what he was looking for and drank the vial in one go, restoring most of his health and using Divinity's Light to heal the rest.
"Think the Changelings got into this trouble too?" Solace asked as the trio made their way across the grove and towards the tunnel on the other end.
Mixer shrugged his shoulders, "It is a distinct possibility and if we had this much trouble with two, chances are they are having an even worse time."
Joystick shook his head with a small smile, "Nah, don't think so. If it's one thing I know about Seeker: he knows how to pick his fights."
<----> ---- ---- <---->
The pair of Changelings found themselves entering a long hallway, tall pillars arranged in a long row along the length of the space, supporting the ceiling that hovered above their heads. Unlike the rest of the dungeon they had seen, this place was immaculately well-kempt, not one sign of rubble or wear on their surroundings. It even smelt strange, as if somepony had been living there and quite recently.
Illusion walked up to one of the pillars, running her hoof along the rough surface as she tried to find any flaws but her keen eyesight couldn't find anything beyond the sporadic, tiny hairline fractures, "How strange... and this dungeon has been beyond your typical fare since we set hoof in here..."
Seeker nodded his head, "Yeah... this place... it's too well maintained. I have a bad feeling about this..."
Illusion turned and looked back at Seeker, "Trust your instincts. A Changeling is hardly ever wrong when sensing trouble. It's how we evolved."
Seeker nodded his head and took out his Bow Gun to prepare for the worst, "Alright, I'll keep an eye out."
Seeker's ears perked up as he and Illusion heard the sounds of heavy hoofsteps, coming from one of the other entrances to the hallway. The Changelings exchanged looks and hid behind the pillars, Illusion being the closest to the entrance with Seeker a distance away which put him in an excellent position to provide cover fire.
The hoofsteps got louder with every passing second and as they did, so did Seeker's heart, beating louder within his chest as his hoof rested on the trigger. He looked down the barrel's ironsights, waiting for Illusion's signal to fire or for when his trigger-hoof twitched a bit too much. The hoofsteps were soon drowned out by voices, voices that both Changelings recognised.
They eased up as they saw the familiar faces of Joystick, Mixer and Solace as they came into the hall in that specific order. They were busy sheathing their weapons when the stallions caught sight of the pair.
Joystick chuckled when he saw the Changelings looking ready to fight, "Jumpy much, you two?"
Seeker smiled sheepishly as he walked up towards them, "S-sorry. Last encounter we had saw us hightailing it at high speed."
Illusion gave them all her usual, stoic look, "The odds were not in our favour. Four Pyrelurkers to two."
Solace looked at Illusion, "Four? That is quite nasty. We barely managed fighting against two of the blighters. They're fast, tough and pack quite the punch."
Joystick's expression turned sombre, "I can attest to that. Nearly took me out." "But point is we got past them and now we're here," Mixer said, looking around. "We must be in some sort of antechamber close to the end of this dungeon."
"Kind of short isn't it?" Solace remarked, "I thought a dungeon like this would be longer, filled with more traps and monsters. Where's the danger? The sense of adventure and accomplishment that is supposed to go with this place?"
Illusion shrugged, "It's not the length of the journey but the quality of the experience and the company you experience it with."
Joystick looked at her with some surprise in his voice as he did not expect this type of comment from such an unfeeling pony, "Since when did you turn into a fortune cookie from the Rising Sun Restaurant?"
"It's my opinion, don't have to like it you know," Illusion deadpanned.
"I never said I didn't like it. I like fortune cookies. Crunchy, sweet and have a lovely little message in the middle provided you don't swallow the cookie in one go like first-timers usually do. Just saying that what you said was actually kind of deep," Joystick responded.
Illusion did not answer back as she resumed her careful inspection of the area, walking around meticulously taking in every small detail. The other four left her to it, walking to the only exit left to them since they came in from the other two which lay on the other side of the hallway.
Illusion soon followed them, her curiosity sated for the moment but she was none wiser for it. "Ready."
"You sure? I think there's a corner over there with some mould that you may have left out," Joystick replied, a mischievous grin on his face.
"Yes," Illusion sharply answered, giving the white Paladin another of her unyielding, mysterious expressions.
"Okay then. Let's go see what lies in wait for us at the end of door number one?" Joystick said as he regarded the entire group.
"Time to kick flank and chew gum. And they don't sell gum in this game," Solace said with a grin.
"They do sell tree sap though. Lots and lots of the sticky stuff," Joystick chimed in happily as he and Solace looked at each other.
"Yeah, may as well. It's why we came here in the first place. That and to see if the key was authentic," Illusion said, nodding her head as the joke went well over her head.
"Yeah, I'm about as ready as I'll ever be," Seeker responded, looking unsure of himself despite the confidence that everypony else seemed to possess.
"Keep calm and shoot straight," Mixer said, looking at Seeker with his usual deadpan expression. "We'll make an adventurer out of you yet."
Seeker inhaled deeply then exhaled, calming himself down to a manageable degree, "Alright. Ready."
The group began their trek into the next room in a two-one-two formation: Joystick and Illusion in the front, walking side by side; Solace and Seeker at the rear with Mixer walking in-between the two pairs.
The room they entered had no ambient lighting whatsoever, no torches, braziers, chandeliers or even bioluminescent plantlife to give them any indication as to their surroundings or their position therein. The unicorns and Changelings it their horns in various, colourful hues to help the party see in the dark room.
The room was bathed in a myriad of colour, allowing them to see that it was a massive circular chamber with several stairs leading downwards to a pedestal in the centre. The ceiling above could not be seen as the light was not strong enough to reach that high. The sound of dripping water could be heard in the distance, soon revealed to be a small pony shaped font, the water coming out both of the eyes and into a wide, shallow basin below that was a part of the wall at the opposite end of the chamber.
The group began to survey the chamber more closely by splitting up, Solace pairing with Mixer since the Pegasus did not have his own light source. Illusion placed a hoof on the stone wall she had walked up to and recoiled quickly in shock. Along the walls was a thin layer slime that made Illusion's carapace crawl.
"Disgusting..." She muttered under her breath, looking around, only to find it went past her range of vision, into the darkness above.
"Can somepony please light something so I can see as well? Really regretting not taking a tourch with me right now," Solace asked, uncomfortable with being the only one without a light.
"We would if there was something to light up," Joystick replied as he looked around for said light source.
"The pedestal may have something that could work as a light source. Should examine it," Mixer commented as he turned his attention to the silhouette of the aforementioned pedestal.
"I'm on it," Joystick responded, "Seeker, come help out."
Seeker nodded and buzzed over as Joystick walked down to the pedestal. It had a base seemingly made from sandstone about three feet thick, making the statue atop it slightly harder to reach for the none-flying adventurer. Atop the base was a large Alicorn statue sitting on its haunches with its head gazing downwards at a large serpent that was wrapped around it.
The Alicorn was made of a brilliant-white, finely-polished marble while the serpent was made from a glistening, pitch-black obsidian that seemed to suck in the light around it. The serpent was wrapped around the Alicorn's left foreleg, chest, neck as well as its lower back. The snake's head faced upwards with its jaw wide open and its fangs poised to strike.
Seeker landed on the base before offering Joystick a hoof to help him get up onto the sandstone with his friend. In the snake's gaping maw was a shallow bowl filled with an opaque liquid that seemed to suck the light from both Seeker and Joystick's horns. The liquid also had an unnatural sparkle and moved a little like the waves on a beach that made it all the more mysterious to the curious pair.
Seeker looked to Joystick, "Maybe it's flammable?"
Joystick shrugged as his horn lit up a bit brighter, "It's worth a shot."
Joystick sent a spark from his horn to the liquid, trying to ignite it as if it were lantern oil. The liquid consumed the spark and, at first, refused to react at all. Joystick looked at Seeker and shook his head while Seeker shrugged. As they turned to get off, cutting their losses with it being a viable source of illumination, the liquid ignited in a pure black flame that began to consume the pedestal.
The pair exchanged panicked looks as they leapt off the pedestal's base before it too was consumed by the unholy flames. The rest of the group watched as Joystick galloped up the stairs, meeting up with Mixer and Solace while Seeker landed next to Illusion who had pulled out her blades in anticipation for a fight. The rest of the group took out their weapons and waited at the fire grew till it licked at the ceiling, igniting the slime that clung to it and the walls surrounding them. In doing so it had also stopped the party from exiting as it also consumed the entrance they came through.
"Well... looks like we're not going out that way," Joystick muttered with slight annoyance.
The fire in the centre of the chamber had died some and had begun to lift into the air. The pedestal and statue were gone from sight as if the flames reduced it to absolutely nothing, not even ash. The flames fell straight back down to the ground with great force, kicking up a blast of wind that made everypony desperately grab a hold of something to avoid flying into the burning walls and making a loud, sickening crack as if it had broken the floor.
Solace's jaw dropped slightly as he looked at what now stood at the centre of the chamber once the flames died out, "Ohhh... horseapples..."
Standing twice as tall as any of them was a pony as black as the night sky. It had the body structure of a mare and it seemed to be smoking from head to hooves. It had a horn a metre long and sharp enough to pierce bone with ease. Its wings were wide open and Illusion noted it possessed a wingspan of nearly twelve feet. Its eyes were teal and glowed faintly as it surveyed the chamber, its catlike irises sending chills up the group's spines.
Its mane and tail sparkled like the night sky, moving of its own volition like the Princesses' although it was not as long. It had an azure chestplate and helmet in a design that was quite familiar to those worn by Nightmare Moon herself save for the crescent moon on the chestplate.
Its flanks bore no cutie mark which was odd for a pony, even one that looked like it was spat out of Tartarus itself. It began to walk, each step making a small, resonating boom as each azure armour-clad hoof made contact with the floor, leaving cracks in the stone and a hoof-shaped dent every time as if it weighed several tons.
Seeker looked above it to see the words Lesser Nightmare lv9 hovering above it before slowly transitioned to a gold label. The Lesser Nightmare stopped for a moment before charging towards Joystick at a frightening pace. Mixer and Solace dodged to the left and right respectively to get out of its way.
The Paladin activated his Shining Beacon ability as the Lesser Nightmare slammed into him with the force of a freight train as he was hit by its Crushing Charge ability. Joystick's body flew and collided with the burning wall, immolating him and causing a burn status effect, damaging him slightly with every passing second which made the stallion shout in fright as he tried to put himself out.
"Joystick!" Seeker shouted with concern as his friend already looked quite weak from the one attack, struggling to get to his hooves.
Joystick shook his head and tried to smile, "I'm okay... just a little whiplashed... ow... Keep your distance!"
The Lesser Nightmare looked at Illusion as she flew at it and used her Terminal Velocity ability. The Lesser Nightmare used its Crushing Charge ability again, launching itself into the air with surprising speed and colliding with her.
The pair collided with the floor, Illusion coming off second best as the force left a small crater in the stone floor. It used its own magic to lift Illusion by her horn and tossed her aside, sending her shouting across the room as if she was the creature's ragdoll and it was a foal having a tantrum.
Seeker's eyes widened and he flew up to catch her but the momentum saw them both flying backwards and landing against the floor, coming up a few inches shy of the burning walls. Seeker groaned a bit in pain as Illusion shakily climbed off him as her own body was sore, the heat from the flames not helping them in the slightest.
"Keep your distance he said... easier said than done when all you use are swords!" Illusion shouted as she charged back to the monster's position.
Joystick had stopped burning and used his Divinity's Light ability to heal a portion of his health. He charged the monster as well, in time with Illusion in the hopes of confusing it to the point where it would be too indecisive to strike either attacker. The unholy creature looked at the pair with indifference and charged at Joystick again but stopped before they ever got within ten feet of each other as it was hit by an explosion to its side which forced it to its knees for a few brief moments.
Seeker had once again used his High Impact Shot ability since Joystick and Illusion were at a distance where they would not be within the ability's area of effect. Solace hid behind a pillar and used Ricochet to send a round rebounding off the walls and hit the Lesser Nightmare square in its chest, in a spot not covered by the thick chestplate.
The creature however did not even grunt in minor discomfort as it stood back up, making the group's jaws drop a bit in shock over its resilience. Mixer raised his staff into the air and used Crystal Storm, raining red crystals down on the Lesser Nightmare's smoking body. The creature stopped attacking as it was pelted by Mixer's attack, flinching each time a crystal collided with its large frame.
After a few brief seconds it shook its head and began walking through the spell's area of effect, shrugging off the attack as its health was continuously whittled down in. It stopped walking once it exited the area of effect while the spell's duration came to an end and looked directly at Mixer with its piercing, unnerving gaze that could freeze water in an instant. Luckily for them nopony was carrying the useless liquid in their inventory.
The back hairs on Mixer's neck stood on end as the Lesser Nightmare opened its maw wide, easily large enough to swallow a pony's head in one bite. Instead of charging and trying to swallow Mixer as he thought, a large plume of pitch black flames identical to the flames that surrounded the room exited its mouth instead and very quickly made its way to the Crystal Mage as he fled for cover.
Mixer barely escaped the monster's Demon's Breath ability as he dived behind a large mural wall whose picture was quickly bathed in the unholy flames. The resulting attack quickly scorched it to the point that the mural's depiction of several ponies performing an unknown ritual had become completely unrecognisable. Mixer's heart thumped hard against his chest as the Lesser Nightmare kept up its attack before another loud explosion made it stumble, cancelling its attack.
Seeker hid behind a statue of a stallion standing on all four hooves, clad in armour and staring blankly at the immolated wall it was facing. He smiled to himself, thankful his High Impact Shot managed to give Mixer a short reprieve. Joystick took the opportunity Seeker had just provided to strike the creature with his blade, knocking it back a little as it stumbled again and reared up.
A moment of hope flickered in his eyes which made him smile but it was dashed quickly as the creature's hooves began to glow a faint purple colour and brought them down on him. Joystick rolled backwards, just in time as the Lesser Nightmare's hooves arced with lightning, impacting with the floor as it used Force Impact.
The force behind the attack created a crater three metres in diameter and everypony felt the accompanying shockwave ripple through their bodies but it did not cause any physical damage nor did it affect their mana pools. However the attack knocked Joystick back ten feet, making him land on his back with a clang. Mixer fired off an amethyst at the Lesser Nightmare as he used his Hinder ability.
It found its mark as it covered a half of the creature's barrel on the right side and the base of one smouldering wing. A triumphant grin crossed his lips as did the rest of the party, knowing the fight just might have just gotten a bit more manageable. The Lesser Nightmare did not slow down as it opened its mouth once again, causing the group to seek shelter from the manifested creature's dark flames.
Its Demon's Breath blew over the group's cover, following its attack with its Crushing Charge ability and slamming hard into a column where Solace had taken refuge. A loud, sickening crack was added to the cacophony of sounds and shouts that had been flying about the room, either from a weapon or the party. Only the Lesser Nightmare remained as silent as death itself, its only sounds coming from its mighty hooves.
"Sweet Celestia's flanks!" Solace shouted as he flew out from the collapsing column before it could crush him. "Status effects don't work on it! Try something else! I am far too handsome to be this thing's new chewtoy!"
Illusion got the monster's attention as she sliced at its flank with her dual blades, making it abruptly turn to face her and charge. Illusion's eyes widened for a moment as the Crushing Charge collided with her chest with enough force to make her think she was getting run down by the combined weight of an entire stampeding herd of buffalo.
Illusion flew through the air and her back slammed into the burning wall with a crack as if she just broke her back or her carapace. Her body began to glow brightly before it shattered into thousands of tiny fragments as if she was a dropped porcelain pot. Seeker's eyes widen in shock as one of their own just got 'killed' in-game.
He had just seen one of his own kin expire, something that affects Changelings quite deeply due to their near hive mind mentality. Although one can go on their own as Seeker had done, there is always a deeper connection when Changelings are in pairs or groups. He was forced out of his reverie as the Lesser Nightmare began to attack yet again.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Illusion appeared back in the dungeon in the same way she had departed it although the animation was reversed. She shook her head groggily while her limbs felt like they had been filled with lead. The feeling of being revived had been designed in such a way it made the player feel a little disorientated but not enough to cause sickness whilst causing some minor weariness but only if the immediate area was safe. This could be turned off in the options if they felt it was too much to bear, or annoying.
Gathering her wits, she ran down the corridor Joystick, Solace and Mixer had taken earlier as she knew there were still Pyrelurkers waiting for her should she have gone the same route she and Seeker had travelled. Repeated use of her Terminal Velocity ability greatly shortened her journey and charged for the room the rest of the party were in, still fighting the Lesser Nightmare.
She muttered under her breath, uttering curses that only a Changeling would understand, all of which were directed at the creature that sent her back to the hall as she turned corner after corner at high speed.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
While Illusion was busy closing the distance between her and the rest of the group, they had been having a very difficult time trying to defeat the Lesser Nightmare as nothing seemed to be doing much but despite this they kept up their assault as best they could.
"Incoming!" Seeker shouted as the Lesser Nightmare charged once more at, this time at Mixer and used Force Impact in an attempt to smash the Crystal Mage into the stone floor. Mixer leapt to the side as he tried to move out of the way and successfully dodged the monster's hooves as they came down with bone-shattering force.
The attack created another shockwave and this time, since Mixer was mere inches away from it, got swept up by the shockwave and flew a short distance away. Mixer landed on the ground with a thud and slid along the smooth floor while his staff had impaled the ground beside him, top first. Mixer got to his hooves as fast as he was able but it caused him to feel lightheaded and he began to see multiple images on top of another as if he was incredibly drunk.
"This thing just will not fight fair!" Joystick bellowed as he faced off with the Lesser Nightmare, its hooves bashing against his shield with great fervour.
Every strike from the large creature's hooves pushed Joystick further back, unable to stand against the amount of force he was being subjected to. The room resounded with the uttering of Joystick's pained grunts and the Lesser Nightmare's hooves bashing metal.
"Come on, this thing just has to die already!" Solace shouted, "I mean we have thrown everything but a house at it!"
"Well if you got one hidden in your armour somewhere, now would be the perfect time to throw it!" Joystick snapped as he charged the creature for the umpteenth time.
"Afraid we're outta luck. It's in my other pants on Aeroslida," Solace replied as he opened fire, using Ricochet. The round rebounded off two pillars before connecting with the creature's right flank.
"Why don't you use that combined move from that quest with the apples?" Seeker asked, ducking for cover behind a pillar to avoid the Lesser Nightmare's Crushing Charge as it hurtled past him, nearly getting him by the tail but thanks to the distance it had to travel it was unable to get Seeker in time.
"Only works if we can keep it stationary and do you think this thing will stay still for more than five seconds?!" Mixer shouted as he unleashed another Crystal Storm, raining ruby-coloured crystals down on the creature.
"Maybe if we asked really nicely it will keep still?" Joystick said, trying to stay optimistic as they were still a player down and their health bars were warning them that they were a few short moments from being depleted.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Illusion charged through the dungeon as she followed the path that the ponies had taken. Her mind was solely focused on a single word that was muttered under her breath with every corner she took: revenge. She powered through the underground grove and eventually found herself back in the hallway that led to the fight, the fight she needed to rejoin.
At the end of the hallway was a massive wall of black fire, consuming the entryway to the chamber the party were fighting in, its unnatural embers burned as if mocking the Changeling, egging her to dare walk through it, to dare touch its dark warmth and be burned to a cinder. Illusion continued to run with her Terminal Velocity active once again, her gaze unwavering from what lay beyond the fire.
The party needed her but more importantly she needed her retribution. She yelled as she leapt through the wall, a part of her expecting the fire to consume her and take her out or, at the very least, inflict a status effect whilst inflicting damage. Strangely though there was nothing, no burn, no heat, not even smoke to inhale as she travelled through the fire.
<----> ---- ---- <---->
Joystick turned to look at the blocked off entryway as he heard the thud of hooves on stone. He grinned as he saw Illusion returning to the fray, "So nice of you to join us. You're missing out on all the fun!"
Illusion was about to shout a retort but stopped herself as Joystick was flung across the room once again, sliding along the floor with the sound of grinding metal as his armour caused friction against the floor since his attention was on the Changeling and not on the monster that had just walloped him.
"I'd say something but it appears you have your hooves full!" Illusion shouted once Joystick stopped sliding and got up again. The Changeling charging and body-slammed the Lesser Nightmare as if she were a pro wrestler.
Sadly while her body slam made the right sound, it had little effect on the Lesser Nightmare as it simply swatted her away as if she were a gnat. It was as if she was trying to tackle a brick wall that is able to hit back and spew hellfire. Illusion grunted as she slid across the floor, just coming short of impacting with a pillar.
She got up and dodged another Crushing Charge from the Lesser Nightmare. Once again the creature slammed into the pillar and for the first time showed some form of reaction as it staggered more than it had had done so far in the fight.
Joystick's eyes widened as a plan formed in his head, "The pillars! Try to get it to chase you into the pillars!"
The party shouted assorted confirmations and Illusion started their plan off as she ran up to the Lesser Nightmare and used her Terminal Velocity ability to give her a boost to her speed. She leapt up and landed on the creature's head with a thud and then, using the head as a springboard, jumped off the creature, landing behind the Lesser Nightmare with the grace of an acrobat.
She bolted for the nearest pillar as the Lesser Nightmare gave chase. Nopony interrupted the Changeling's mad dash as she feinted left, causing the creature to impact with the pillar with a resounding thud. The creature staggered just as before, dazed as it backpedalled and tried to find its next target despite the chunk of health it had just lost.
"Distract it guys!" Joystick shouted from his hiding spot: another one of the many pillars that were inside the chamber but it was too far away for him to mount a sneak attack.
Solace, Seeker and Mixer did not need to be told twice as the Bow Gun users fired round after round at the creature while Mixer used Crystal Storm but it had little visible effect other than seeming to enrage it further. The distraction created by the Hunter and Engineer allowed Joystick, Mixer and Illusion to move into new positions behind pillars closest to the Lesser Nightmare.
"Now!" Joystick shouted as he came out from behind the pillar with Illusion bolting out of her hiding spot.
The pair struck at the creature's legs as they ran past it, knowing full well what happens if they lingered for too long at melee range. The Lesser Nightmare turned and gave chase. It used its Crushing Charge ability, gaining considerable ground. The pair split a pillar between them at the last second, running past it on either side. The Lesser Nightmare collided with the pillar and stopped dead in its tracks.
The creature then stood completely still, leaving the room to fall into awkward, anxious silence. Solace and Seeker kept looking down the sights of their Bow Guns, waiting for the creature to make a move. Any move at all to be precise as they began to wonder if the game had started to glitch on them all.
"Uh... did we win?" Solace asked in confusion, looking at the others in the party as they all came out of their hiding places to investigate the creature's odd behaviour.
"Hey Illusion, go poke it with a sword," Joystick joked, a big grin on his face as he tried to keep himself from laughing.
"How about I poke it with you?" Illusion retorted, clearly not in the mood for joking.
"Watch out!" Mixer shouted as the Lesser Nightmare came rushing towards them with another Crushing Charge attack.
The group dispersed in a mix of yells and frantic shouts. The hellish monster shot past them and collided once more with a pillar, stopping yet again.
"Okay, if it is going to keep doing this, I'm calling for tech support..." Seeker muttered in annoyance as he picked himself off the ground.
Any retort or reply was cut off as they heard a cracking noise coming from the Lesser Nightmare. It had moved its head from the pillar and had left a hole where its head had connected with the stone. The pillar cracked all the way through the stone, giving it a thin smile almost until the same fracture formed above the creature's head, near the ceiling.
A grinding noise began to fill the room as the broken section of the pillar began to slide away from the rest of the stone. The pillar began to tip over once the top section came free from the rest of it still attached to the roof. The Lesser Nightmare yelled out, the first and only proper discernable noise to come from its mouth, as the pillar fell down on top of it with a sickening crunch.
Its legs wobbled as the weight of the broken piece of pillar was getting too much for it to carry. Regardless, it began to advance on the group, causing a few to gasp in shock and awe at how dedicated the programmers made the spawn of Tartarus. Its gaze never left the party for so much as a second as they all backed up with each step it took forward.
"Somepony just kill it!" Illusion shouted in annoyance.
Solace and Seeker exchanged glances with Mixer and started to attack. The Bow Gun users fired round after round from their Normal Magazines, each resonating shot hitting the monster in its wobbling legs in an attempt to force them to buckle. Mixer raised his staff and used his Crystal Storm ability on the Lesser Nightmare to try throw the monster off kilter.
The Lesser NIghtmare grunted and shifted under the attacks that battered its already badly worn-down body. It opened its maw as if to use an attack but, instead, the creature exhaled and just dropped like a lead weight onto the floor. The three attackers stopped their assault on the monster as they all heard a bone-chiling crunch as the pillar crushed the Lesser Nightmare under its weight. A small cloud of dust erupted from the impact, leaving the group stunned at their victory.
Solace's mouth was wide open with disbelief, Seeker looked mortified at the amount of punishment it had to take before it fell, Joystick was grinning from ear to ear as he was more than pleased to have been the one who figured out its weakness, Mixer just had a satisfied smirk upon his face while Illusion stared at it with a blank expression. Their victory was confirmed as they saw themselves recieving a new achivement.
Achievement Unlocked!
The Darkness Cometh
"Anypony need a nightlight?"
Mixer muttered under his breath, a little disappointed hidden beneath his smirk. The creature shook off everything they threw at it and running headfirst into some masonry was all it took to fell it? "That easy?"
Unfortunately for him, Joystick did manage to hear what the Crystal Mage had said, "easy? I'd like to see your definition of 'hard' no wait, scratch that. I do not want to see what your definition of 'hard' is. This was bad enough. I was the one who was thrown about like a plaything. Heck I caught fire for crying out loud."
Illusion rolled her eyes as she started to get a bit frustrated at their bantering, "knock it off you tw-"
The Changeling's scolding was cut off as a deafening explosion of some form shook the chamber the party was in. The ponies fell onto their haunches as their weapons fell onto the stone floor with various clangs and thuds. The area soon normalised which allowed the group to get to their hooves again. Joystick investigated the 'corpse' of the Lesser Nightmare and was bitterly disappointed to find out that there was no loot to gain from it but the attention was more focused on the odd shake.
"What was that?" Seeker asked.
"Hit me with a wet fish if I know," Solace answered with a smile.
"Sadly I lack the required piscis with which to assault you," Illusion said with a small frown.
"'Piscis'?" Mixer asked.
Illusion looked at Mixer with the same frown, "it's Latin."
"What say we head out the way we came, hm?" Joystick offered, trying to keep the peace within the group.
The party nodded their heads and started to make their way to the exit. The flames that had previously surrounded the room and barred their escape started to fizzle out and die, leaving only the group to provide their own illumination yet again. An eerie stillness, save for their hoofsteps, fell on the group as they drew nearer to the open entrance that had led them to the hardest fight they've ever had.
As they got close, one of the pillars supporting the ceiling came down, blocking their path as the room had begun to collapse on itself. They picked up their pace and ran or flew to the doorway but were cut short as the ceiling above collapsed, leaving a towering pile of rubble in their way and with the rest of the room caving in, it was hard to find an alternative exit.
The group backtracked to the centre of the room, where the pedastal once stood, as the pillars and ceiling continued to cave in around them. Oddly enough the ceiling above the section of ceiling above their heads was not falling down. It looked like it was not even cracked. The group kept close, looking out at the room around them as their hopes of escape dropped to 'hopeless'.
Solace coughed with the others due to the high volumes of dust that filled the air, "you know... I'm starting to question the point behind these dungeons..." |
Frozen Heart | pre | "So how are we supposed to fight her then?" Pinkie Pie asked.
Before any of them could answer, they could hear Nightmare laughing. "Nice try. Now it's my turn!"
Before any of them could react, Nightmare unleashed yet another blizzard on them, just as strong and sharp as before. This time, however, the five ponies stood their ground and shielded their faces.
Rainbow Dash tried to open one of her eyes to see Fluttershy. Despite the thickness and, to Rainbow's surprise, sharpness of the blizzard, she could see just in how much pain the others were.
"We have to hold on!" Applejack yelled. "If we lose here, Twilight will die!" ---
Princess Celestia was sweating and breathing hard. She glimpsed at Spike who was coming down the stairs.
Spike, noticing Princess was looking at her, gave a weak smile. "She's going to be fine, Princess. She just used too much power in short time."
Princess Celestia didn't say anything and just continued her attempt to buy more time.
"How is she?" Spike asked.
Princess Celestia closed her eyes. "Not good, I'm afraid. I have tried everything I could think of, but nothing seems to be working as they should. It is as if something is blocking any healing attempts." Tears could be seen running down Princess' cheeks. "We are losing her slowly but steadily."
Spike had gone wide eyed. "No! That can't be true, Princess. Surely there's something we can still do."
Lightning struck outside as Princess Celestia looked at Twilight, who was looking eerily calm, with her tearful eyes. She could tell Twilight was still feeling so much pain. "I cannot do anything but buy her more time and even I am at my limit now. Healing magic is not exactly light, you know." She looked around her, seeing the other ponies lying on the floor, their expressions unreadable. "They do not have much time left. In a matter of minutes..."
Princess Celestia couldn't finish the sentence. Instead she fell down gently, her head falling on top of Twilight's body, and cried while her hair practically caressed Twilight's head. "Please, my faithful student, wake up..." She could hear almost non-existent breathing. ---
The five ponies hadn't moved anywhere despite how powerful the blizzard was. Rainbow Dash tried to focus on Nightmare, but every time her eyes hurt.
"ARGH!" Rainbow Dash yelled. "We won't be able to do anything at this rate. We have to get closer."
"I feel so cold!" Rarity yelled. "We're going to freeze here."
That made Applejack angry. "Well then let's walk towards Twilight!"
"WHAT?" was what other ponies said.
"Even I think that's crazy, Applejack!" Pinkie Pie said.
"Do you have any better ideas?" Applejack said.
It was then Rainbow Dash thought she heard something behind her. As she looked behind her she couldn't believe her eyes.
Fluttershy had begun to walk towards Nightmare and Twilight.
"Fluttershy, you all right?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Applejack, Rarity and Pinkie Pie managed to look at Fluttershy too.
"I'm... fine." Fluttershy said despite the beating she's had from the blizzard.
Applejack looked forward then, but she didn't close her eyes. "Let's save Twilight, everypony!"
"Move!!" Rainbow Dash yelled as she also tried to move towards Nightmare and Twilight. "MOVE!!!"
The four ponies slowly began to walk towards Nightmare and Twilight along with Fluttershy.
Nightmare laughed at the sight. "What good do you think walking over here will accomplish? No matter. This little foal called Twilight Sparkle is already dead!"
"NO!" Rainbow Dash yelled. "She's still alive and she will be alive when we're through with you!"
"As Twilight's friends, we will do everything we can to save her." Rarity said.
"We promised Princess Celestia we'd save her and Ah always keep my promises." Applejack said.
"Twilight will still have many parties after this." Pinkie Pie said.
"She's the one that brought us all together." Fluttershy said, her voice sounding surprisingly loud. "We're all friends thanks to her."
"ENOUGH!!" Nightmare yelled, causing a wave of energy hit the five ponies, stopping them in their tracks. "Everything you say makes me sick and angry! I think I'll end this NOW!"
Right then Twilight's heart was engulfed in black flames and slowly, to the other ponies' horror, began to disappear. ---
Twilight suddenly began screaming, startling Princess Celestia and Spike, but Princess Celestia knew what was going on and she embraced Twilight, giving her a hug.
"My dear Twilight..." Princess Celestia said, her tears running down her cheeks.
"NO!" Spike yelled. ---
"NO!!" Applejack cried out as Twilight's heart had almost completely vanished.
"TWILIGHT!!" Rainbow Dash yelled. "You have to wake up. Please, Twilight!! Wake up!!"
But there was no reaction.
Tears were forming in the ponies' eyes as she and the other ponies watched helplessly. For one final desperate attempt, they all cried out: "TWILIGHT!!!!"
Right then, a light, mixed with various colors, lit the area up and engulfed the five ponies, the crystal and Twilight's heart. ---
In the darkness, crying could be heard.
"I'm... all alone." a voice said. "Nopony will ever forgive me. Not my parents, my big brother or Princess Celestia. I have nothing left. I should just..."
Five colorful lights suddenly shone brightly on the area.
"You're wrong, dear." a voice echoed. "You're not alone."
"Y'all have us." another voice echoed. "Friends who forgive y'all."
"Friends who will stay loyal to you no matter what." a third voice echoed.
"Friends who will play with you." a fourth, cheery voice echoed.
"Friends who will support you in times of trouble." a fifth voice echoed.
"We are here for you!" ---
Cracking sounds could be heard as the crystal began crack up.
"No..." Nightmare's voice echoed.
Slowly but surely, Twilight's heart opened her eyes and in a flash of light the crystal shattered to pieces and disappeared.
"NOOO~~!!!" was all Nightmare could yell before disappearing along with the crystal, its voice echoing around the area.
After the light died down, the five ponies opened their eyes, having closed them when the flash of light filled the area, and looked at Twilight's heart, which didn't move anywhere nor did anything.
"Umm... you okay?" asked Rainbow Dash.
There was no answer.
"Thank you, my little ponies."
All five ponies turned around and saw a familiar light shining in the darkness.
"You have saved us both miraculously." the spirit of Magic said.
"What happened and why isn't Twilight moving?" Rainbow Dash asked.
The spirit of Magic giggled. "That is Twilight's heart. It is not supposed to move. Just emit and give life to the one it beats for. As for what happened... well, let's just say that your determination and your friendship saved Twilight Sparkle and pulled her out of the nightmare."
"So she'll be a'right?" Applejack asked.
"Yes." was all the spirit of Magic said.
All five ponies cheered loudly.
"WOOHOO!! This is fantastic!" Pinkie yelled.
"We did it, everypony!" Rainbow Dash said. "We did it."
But then Rarity stopped as she realized one thing. "Wait a moment. How are we going to get back?"
"Like this." was all the spirit of Magic said before all five ponies suddenly disappeared. ---
All was silent inside the library as Princess Celestia was just sitting on the floor, holding Twilight within her hooves, with Spike watching with sad eyes.
"Princess? Is she... ... She's been quiet for a while now." Spike said.
Princess Celestia opened her eyes and looked at Twilight, seeing she looked calm. Tears fell down her own cheeks as she touched Twilight's head with her horn one more time. "Please, Twilight Sparkle... wake up." With her last effort, her horn glowed, enveloping Twilight with white aura.
Right then, the entire room was filled with bright light, surprising both Princess Celestia and Spike and forcing both of them to close their eyes. In just a few seconds the light died down. When Princess Celestia opened her eyes, she felt like her heart had just stopped as she saw Twilight Sparkle's eyes slightly open, looking at her.
"Everypony! You're awake!"
Princess Celestia looked at Spike in wonder and then turned to see the five ponies, wide awake and smiling. Princess Celestia could only shed tears of happiness at the sight.
"Did... did we do it, Princess?" Rainbow Dash managed to ask.
Princess Celestia only nodded, calming the five ponies, and turned to look at Twilight again.
"Princess Celestia...?" Twilight weakly said. "What...?"
Twilight was cut off as Princess Celestia suddenly hugged Twilight.
"Ssshh... You've being through a lot, my faithful student." Princess Celestia said.
Everyone was quiet for a while, glad that the whole ordeal was over. Twilight managed to turn her head towards library's broken door.
"Why's the library's door broken?" Twilight asked.
Everyone just laughed. Upstairs Princess Luna looked down at the others and smiled at the scene she saw. ---
The morning sun shone in the sky as many unicorns trained their magic in a hallway of Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. Suddenly double doors opened at one end of the hallway, revealing Princess Celestia herself. All of the unicorns bowed as they saw Princess Celestia coming their way, accompanied by her sister, Princess Luna, six ponies of which only two were unicorns and one was carrying a bouquet of flowers with magic and a baby dragon. When the unicorns lifted their heads, they saw the group heading towards the other end of the hallway.
Twilight Sparkle and the others followed Princess Celestia to a courtyard. Twilight looked both sad and nervous as she saw the courtyard in all its beauty. There were some unicorns here too, studying, but their heads turned to the group as they saw the royal pony sisters
"May I have your attention, please?" Princess Celestia said, her voice calm and clear, but loud enough to get every students' attention. "All students must leave the courtyard for an hour. Anypony who wishes to study during this time in peace can go to an empty classroom past the hallway."
All of the unicorn students obeyed without question and left the courtyard.
When all the students were gone, Twilight went to the center of the courtyard, carrying the bouquet of flowers, and stopped. "Here's where it happened."
The others stayed quiet, looking at Twilight.
"This is where the worst moment of my entire life happened." Twilight continued. "Do you remember that day, Princess Celestia? The day when I lost control of my magic?"
Princess Celestia took a few steps toward Twilight. "Yes, I do remember, Twilight Sparkle. I also remember that it wasn't your fault."
Twilight was quiet for a while. "Maybe not, but I never forgot what I did back then. It has haunted me to this day."
"Wha happened, Twi?" Applejack asked as she went closer to Twilight.
Twilight lowered her head.
**Flashback**
I had just settled down after getting to this school thanks to Princess Celestia. But other unicorns heard how I got in and were... kind of jealous of me, I guess, being Princess' protege and all. One unicorn was especially jealous. She soon confronted me right here in this courtyard when it was empty, boasted about a lot of things, but not like Trixie. Her accomplishments were very real, but when I just ignored her, trying to study, things got messy then. She used her magic on me, tried to provoke me to attack her. I didn't fall for it at first, but when she didn't show any signs of stopping, my patience ran out and... I lost control just like during my entrance exam.
When I calmed down, the sight I saw was horrible. That unicorn was badly hurt. The teachers had sensed me and came to check what was going on. They immediately took the unicorn to the infirmary. I couldn't say anything to them. It was then when Princess Celestia came and asked me what had happened. Of course I told her everything. The teachers wanted to expel me for doing such a thing, but Princess Celestia disagreed and mentioned what had happened during the entrance exam. The teachers only gave me a warning then.
**End of flashback**
"On that day, I learned that I really had strong magic in me and that I was responsible for it. It had to be controlled and used wisely." Twilight continued. "It never happened again after that, but the experience made me fear my own power, fear what other thought about me."
There was silence for a moment.
"What happened to that unicorn, Twilight?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Twilight didn't answer. Instead Princess Celestia turned to see Rainbow Dash. "That unicorn is fine, Rainbow Dash. She ranked high here in school and took a job here afterwards as a teacher. She was second only to Twilight Sparkle. However, the incident did leave its mark on her."
Right then doors opened up again, making everyone, including Twilight to turn around. The pony they saw had a black coat and white colored mane and tail. As the unicorn mare came closer, the other ponies could see that there was an eye patch on her right eye and her cutie mark was a shining wand.
"It has been a long time, Twilight Sparkle." The unicorn said.
"Indeed it has been." Twilight said rather sadly. "I won't take much of your time. I just... wanted to apologize to you for what I did to you that day."
The unicorn was silent for a while. Then, to everyone's surprise, giggled. "Is that what this is about, Twilight? I've already moved past that. I don't hold any grudges that you put out one of my eyes that day. I think I actually deserved it. And the nurses were able to heal me of the other wounds."
"Still, I'm sorry." Twilight said as she gave the bouquet of flowers to the unicorn. "I've felt horrible every day ever since that incident."
The unicorn took the bouquet with her magic. "Twilight, you don't need to feel bad about it."
"I lost control of my magic and you got hurt." Twilight said. "I was lucky I was allowed to stay here after that. I studied so much about magic so that something like that would never happen again."
"While that's good and all, you really don't need to feel bad about that day, Twilight." the unicorn said. "I was just so jealous of you and I pushed you too far. If I hadn't done that I wouldn't have lost my eye. I should be the one to ask forgiveness from you."
Twilight lowered her head, looking sad.
"You need to learn to let go of the past, Twilight." the unicorn said. "What happened between you and me cannot be changed. All we can do is learn from our mistakes." She then went and gave Twilight a hug. "And I see we both have. Let it go, Twilight."
As the others listened and watched quietly at the scene, Pinkie obviously having trouble keeping quiet as she smile widely, Twilight closed her eyes and returned the hug. ---
Nighttime was about to start in Equestria as Princess Celestia went to the balcony to lower te sun. Before she could, however, she heard a knock at the door.
"Come in." Princess Celestia said as she turned to look at the door.
The door opened and revealed Princess Luna.
"Ah, my beloved sister. I was just about to lower the sun." Princess Celestia said.
"Before you do that, dear sister, may I ask something?" Princess Luna said.
"Anything, dear Luna."
"Is Twilight Sparkle... so important to you?" Princess Luna asked. "I noticed back at the treebrary that you treat her like she was your own foal."
Princess Celestia stayed quiet for a while before turning around to see the sun, smiling all the time. "Well, dear sister, Twilight was, in a way, raised by me, but she does have her own parents. You should know that."
"I do, dear sister, but to go for such lengths for your personal student... You were ready to throw your life away if Twilight Sparkle had died."
Again Princess Celestia was silent for a moment. "Yes, dear Luna, and I would do it again. Because Twilight Sparkle... will change Equestria in ways even we could never do."
"What do you mean, dear sister?" Princess Luna asked. "How will Twilight Sparkle change Equestria?"
Princess Celestia didn't answer. Instead she closed her eyes as her horn began glow golden light. In the horizon the sun descended and disappeared out of view. "It's time to raise the moon, my dear Luna." She turned around and went to her bed.
"Wait, dear Tia..." Princess Luna started, but couldn't continue as she saw Princess Celestia lying on her bed. Princess Luna turned around and went to the balcony. She closed her eyes as her horn began glow dark blue light. Within seconds, the moon rose in the horizon.
"Goodnight, dear sister."
The End |
Pinkamena's Awakening | pre | "What the!?"
"Her eyes!" They all said.
Pinkie looked up at her friends... her eyes completely black with those same blood red pupils that Twilight saw before.
"G-Guys... help me..." Pinkie cried.
Pinkie let out one final scream before she was finally consumed. Her mane flowed down and became darker, her coat as well lost that cheerful bright color and turned the same. Her cutiemark vanished... along with who she was.
"Pinkie! Pinkie answer us!" Twilight and the others said. ...
Pinkie stood up and turned around to look at her... friends, and all they saw... were those blood red eyes, staring them in the face. ...
"Pinkie Pie isn't here anymore..." The Dark Pony said.
"W-Wait a minute!" Fluttershy said.
"That means your her..."
"Split personality!?" Rainbow Dash and Rarity said.
"That's right... you may call me..."
"Pinkamena." |
Pinkamena's Awakening | Revival and Imprisonment | Chapter 4: Revival and Imprisonment
"Ahhhhhh! It sure does feel good to finally be free of that idiot's mind!" Pinkamena said, stretching her body.
"Now I can finally use my strength to its' fullest potential and have some fun here..." Pinkamena continued.
"Hey! What did you do with our friend Pinkie Pie!" Rainbow Dash yelled.
"Yea what happened to her! Just who are you anyway!?" Applejack questioned.
"Weren't you listening to her before her final words? Or did you just ignore it because of how ridiculous it sounds?" Pinkamena said.
"Your her split personality." Twilight said. "Although it doesn't make any sense... The proof is staring me right in the face, so I can't really deny it."
"Hmph, At least there was someone with a brain in your little group of friends here." Pinkamena snickered.
"But still, how is it that Pinkie had such a... complex personality, that it was able to develop a mind of its' own?" Twilight asked.
"We all have sides of us that we don't reveal to our friends or to public, but we all experience happiness, anger, sadness, and other emotions regularly correct?" Pinkamena said.
"Pinkie Pie was... different however. She repressed all forms of discomfort subconsciously, which is why she was almost happy 24/7, and I say almost because she did show signs of these negative emotions at points before." Pinkamena continued.
"Like when your friend Fluttershy there tried to become assertive, but took it too far and ended up hurting Pinkie and Rarity, or when Applejack broke her... Pinkie promise? However these were very minimal, so it barely had an impact on her personality." Pinkamena explained.
"After years of constantly repressing these emotions, it gets to a certain point where it all just builds up over time to one point... and I was that point in her mind." Pinkamena said.
Twilight stood there intrigued, trying to comprehend what Pinkamena has just told her, while all of the others were just dumbfounded.
"Alright alright, enough with all your fancy, shmancy big words! I can see clear as day that you ain't our friend and that's all I gotta know at this point!" Applejack said.
"Yea! I'm with Applejack on this one! Give us back our friend before I have to make you!" Rainbow Dash said.
"I agree, I can not stand by and simply watch as you do what you want with Pinkie's body!" Rarity said.
"That's right! When it comes down to my friends, I won't forgive you if you hurt them!" Fluttershy said.
"My friends are right, you may be a lost part of Pinkie Pie, but what your doing is unforgivable! Now give us back our friend this instant!" Twilight said.
Pinkamena laughed quietly to herself.
"And if I don't?" Pinkemena said.
"Then I guess we'll have to do this the hard way!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Oh? You would use force hm? This is still your friends' body might I remind you, would you really take it upon yourselves to injure her?" Pinkamena said.
"That may be Pinkie's body, but she isn't the one in control at the moment, and we'll do whatever it takes to get her back!" Twilight said.
"Hmph, if that's your decision then fine, let's have some fun shall we?" Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena swung her hoof in the air and a wave of darkness started to surround her from the bottom up, swirling upwards until she was encased in it. After a few seconds, the darkness dissipated and Pinkamena was wearing a black outfit with red streaks going through it and a black-like aura emitting from her body.
"Shall we begin?" Pinkamena said.
Twilight and the others were frightened by the immense power they saw she controlled. But all they cared about was rescuing their friend at this point.
"You think that any of that scares me? Pfft, think again!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Then prove it if your so sure of yourself." Pinkamena said.
Rainbow Dash, being easily provoked, charged right towards Pinkamena at full speed.
"Rainbow Dash! Wai-" Twilight yelled.
"You always were too reckless Rainbow Dash." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena evaded Rainbow Dash's tackle with ease, turned around and touched Rainbow on her chest.
"Huh?" Rainbow Dash said, confused.
A second after the touch, a sonic wave emitted from Pinkamena's hoof and Rainbow Dash was sent flying into the wall at incredible speeds, coughing up blood at the impact.
"Rainbow Dash!" Her friends screamed.
Rainbow fell to the floor, unable to move anymore.
"Wow... *Cough* I didn't expect that *Cough* to happen." Rainbow Dash said, until the pain was too much and passed out.
"Okay... Now you've done it! You insane mare!" Applejack declared.
"Applejack! Wait! No!" Twilight cried, but to no avail.
Applejack charged towards Pinkamena and bucked her right in the face as hard as she could.
"Is that all you can do?" Pinkamena said, as if nothing had even happened.
"Hmph, how disappointing." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena put her hooves around Applejack's head and discharged a large amount of electricity, Applejack screamed.The insane mare's blood-red electricity made quick work of it. Pinkamena pulled her hooves back when she was done, and Applejack fell to the floor, unconscious.
"Is this really all the power you girls have?" Pinkamena said.
"I'm getting quite bored, this isn't even entertaining in the slightest." Pinkamena said, who vanished in an instant after that last comment.
"Wh-What the!? Where did she go?" Twilight said.
Pinkamena reappeared next to Rarity, and touched her on the forehead. Rarity jumped back out of fear from what she will do.
"That's it? A little poke?" Rarity said.
"That's all I need to take care of weaklings like you." Pinkamena said.
Rarity started to feel an intense ringing sound in her head, which got louder and more unbearable every second.
"Aughhh! This ringing! W-What is it! It's killing me!" Rarity screamed.
"That's the idea..." Pinkamena said.
The ringing got so loud until... it stopped, but Rarity had already suffered from its' effects for too long, and fell down, unable to move any longer.
"This is utterly disappointing, I would've at least hoped you five would put up some kind of a challenge." Pinkamena said.
"I guess I gave you girls too much credit..." Pinkamena snickered.
Twilight stood there terrified, two of her best friends knocked unconscious by this... neglected side of Pinkie.
"Fluttershy... Please don't charge out there, w-we don't stand a chance against Pinkamena at the moment. The amount of power she has is unimaginable." Twilight said quietly.
"F-Fluttershy? Did you hear m-" Twilight said.
Twilight turned around to look at Fluttershy, but she was already in Pinkamena's grip, trapped in her choke hold.
"What! B-But how!? You were just over th-" Twilight said.
"You clearly haven't gotten a full grasp on my power yet, have you Twilight?" Pinkamena said, dropping Fluttershy to the ground, gasping for air.
"Perhaps you don't understand the severity of the situation you are in right now." Pinkamena said.
"Here, let me show you what I intend to do with your future." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena walked up to Twilight and touched her forehead. A split second afterwards, Twilight saw a vision of Ponyville burning, Canterlot in ruin, Celestia and Luna fallen. Nothing but chaos and havoc raining down upon everyone.
"N-NOO! NO YOU CAN'T DO THI-"
"And that's only the beginning..." Pinkamena said.
With that last comment, Pinkamena picked Twilight up, threw her upwards, and with her incredible speed, jumped up and punched Twilight right in the stomach, sending her flying downwards into the floor and coughing up blood on impact.
Twilight, using every ounce of willpower she had just trying to stay conscious, looked at Pinkamena.
"I guess I was a fool for thinking you five could ever put up a decent fight, Hmph my mistake." Pinkamena said.
"And for the fact I didn't deliver any fatal blows... consider that my little parting gift." Pinkamena snickered.
"Goodbye Twilight... I think we'll see each other again soon..." Pinkamena said, engulfing herself in a veil of darkness, and vanished.
... ... ...
"P-Pinkie..." Twilight said hoarsely.
"P-Pinkie Pie..." Twilight said, before she passed out.
A few hours after the Fight...
"Twil..."
"Twilight..."
"Twilight!"
"Huh... Wha-What happened... Spike?" Twilight said, still dazed.
"Are you guys okay? When I heard Pinkamena leave, I thought of the worst care scenario of what could've happened to you guys! Thank goodness you're all alright." Spike said gleefully.
"Ughh... yea were all okay I think, just a little beaten up is all." Twilight said.
Twilight looked back to see all of her friends in one piece, awake and sitting with ice packs and bandages.
"Man... that Pinkamena sure can pack a punch..." Rainbow Dash said.
"Ah don't think she was even trying to be honest." Applejack said.
"She was unbelievably powerful, Aughh! I can still hear that annoying ringing sound..." Rarity said.
"I don't even know what happened... I was too scared to understand what was happening..." Fluttershy said.
They all sat there conversing, wondering if there was anything they could do at this point to stop Pinkamena.
"That reminds me." Twilight said.
"Where were you this whole time Spike?" Twilight asked.
"Oh heh, um funny story you know, after I saw Pinkamena change her appearance. I thought it'd be a good idea to well you know... hide? hehe..." Spike said nervously.
"Ugh... thanks Spike, I knew we could count on you." Twilight said.
"I'm sorry guys, but could I do? Even if i did help, I doubt it would do anything." Spike said.
"You're probably right Spike, we were no match for Pinkamena in anyway... I had no idea she was that strong." Twilight said.
"Well... what do we do now?" Rarity asked.
"Let's just try to rest for now, we've all taken quite a beating and there'd be no sense in going after her when there's absolutely nothing we can do to even stop her..." Twilight said.
Everyone agreed and stayed at Twilight's Library for a while in order to recover.
After the Fight, Pinkamena's Point of View...
After Pinkamena had vanished from Twilight's Library, she reappeared outside, on the outskirts of Ponyville.
"Well... that was sure a waste of time, I hope they've realized I wasn't even trying when they wake up..." Pinkamena said.
"Hmmm." Pinkamena thought.
"Now that I'm free, I think I'll finally start putting my plan into action, Hehehehe..." Pinkamena said.
"But I can't do it alone... well I could, put it would take much too long and I don't have the patience at the moment." Pinkamena said.
"So I'll need to find someone of decent strength to aid me in my plans." Pinkamena said.
"Ah! Yes, I remember Pinkie Pie and her friends defeating one by the name of Discord, a Draconiquis to be precise."Pinkamena said. "It shouldn't be too hard to free him from his imprisonment."
"Knowing these fools, they probably just put him up as a garden decoration again. So it shouldn't be hard at all to get to where he is." Pinkamena said.
"Well, no time to lose, guess I'm heading to the Canterlot Sculpture Garden." Pinkamena said, and trotted towards Canterlot.
Shortly after Pinkamena's revival, Pinkie Pie's Imprisonment...
With Pinkie Pie being fully consumed by Pinkamena, Pinkie loses control and finds herself in a place all too familiar...
"Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Pinkie yelled, falling down into the void.
With Pinkie's descent, two chains came flying at her, each one wrapping itself around one of her front hooves.
"W-What's happening!?" Pinkie said, terrified.
Just as she was about to hit what seemed to be the ground, a second wave of chains came flying at her, only this time there were much more, all wrapping themselves around Pinkie's body, completely covering her from the waist down... and with that she was trapped. Suspended in the air with chains wrapped around her body and two separate ones holding her two front hooves up.
"T-This..." Pinkie said drearily.
"This is... where Pinkamena was... for all those years huh?" Pinkie said sorrily.
"Am I?... going to be here for the rest of my life?..." Pinkie said.
"I hope not... I don't see how anyone could stand being in a place like this... for so long too." Pinkie said.
"I guess... I can't blame her for turning out how she did... anypony would go insane from a place like this..." Pinkie said.
Pinkie Pie floated there for a while, in complete darkness, thinking... what could she possibly do.
"Pinkamena said she watched my entire life up to this point while she was trapped here... does that mean I'll be able to see hers'? Now that she's the one in control?" Pinkie questioned.
After a while of floating in her suspended prison, Pinkie started to see visions of what Pinkamena was seeing... what she was doing.
"...!"
"My... My friends! No! NO WHAT'S SHE DOING!" Pinkie screamed, her face flushed red with anger.
"Dang it! No this is terrible... let me out of here! LET ME OUT OF HERE! PINKAMENA!" Pinkie yelled.
"LET ME OUT OF HERE! Pinkamena!" Pinkie yelled out. "Please... let me out of here... I can't take this..."
"It's not like she can hear me though... it wasn't until she broke out of this floatly thingy that I could hear her..." Pinkie said.
"I guess... I'll just have to sit here... and hope for the best..." Pinkie said. "For my friends... for everyone..."
> Dilemma
Chapter 5: Dilemma
Twilight and her friends had been resting for quite some time now, but everyone felt uneasy and nervous, how could they
possibly feel relaxed when one of their best friends' had just been taken away from them? Everypony sat there pondering
what to do next, until Rainbow Dash broke the silence.
"Arghhhh! I can't take this! We can't just sit here and do nothing while Pinkamena is out there wreaking havoc on everyone!" Rainbow Dash said.
"I know how you feel Rainbow, but what can we do? If we go after her it'll only be a repeat of what happened before." Twilight said. "Or maybe even worse..."
"So what do we do? I agree with Rainbow on this one, we can't just sit here the whole time. There must be something we can do." Rarity said.
"At the very least we could warn Princess Celestia about the situation." Rarity continued. "That is if she doesn't already know."
"Great idea Rarity, we have to let the princess know about this!" Twilight said. "Especially since Pinkamena is as strong, or maybe even stronger, than the princess herself."
"Spike! Come over here! I need you to write a letter to the princess immediately!" Twilight ordered.
"You got it Twilight, just tell me what to write!" Spike said.
"Alright Spike, here we go." Twilight said.
Dear Princess Celestia,
This message is of utmost importance, one of our best friends, Pinkie Pie,
has been taken over by a manifestation of her own negative emotions as odd as it may sound.
But what I'm telling you is the truth and she goes by the name of Pinkamena. Her power is beyond that
of normal ponies and her only objective is to wreak havoc and chaos wherever she goes, as revenge for being
trapped in Pinkie's mind for so long. The last time I saw her she was wearing a black outfit with red streaks
going through it. Her eyes have become a blood red, and her mane darkened. I assume it will only be a matter
of time before she makes her way to Canterlot and I ask that you please be careful. I do though however have
one request. If she does come to Canterlot, I ask that you please not use any potentially lethal forces in
response to her presence. Pinkamena may not be Pinkie at the moment, but she's still in there and she's still
out friend, and we'll do whatever it takes to get her back!
Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle
"Did you get all that Spike?" Twilight said.
"Sure did." Spike said.
"Good, now send it right now." Twilight said.
Spike sent the message to Princess Celestia.
"Let's hope Princess Celestia takes my letter seriously." Twilight said.
"Don't worry Twi, She'll believe you, ah know she will." Applejack said.
"I hope so Applejack." Twilight said. "But what should we do now?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Rarity said. "We must head to Canterlot now at once!"
"What? Why would we go there no-" Twilight said.
"Wouldn't you rather be by Celestia's side at a time like this? To make sure that she'll be alright?" Rarity said.
Everyone else looked at Twilight, with smiles on their faces.
"You all want to go to?" Twilight said.
"Heck yea!" Rainbow Dash said. "Someone's gotta protect the princess ya know!"
"Ah reckon we'll all feel a lot better if we were in the princess's presence." Applejack said.
"I agree with Applejack, the princess's castle does have a nice feeling to it." Fluttershy said softly.
Twilight saw that everyone clearly wanted to go, what right did she have to say no to her friends?
"Then it's settled I guess!" Twilight said. "Let's head out for Canterlot!"
"Spike, you stay here and keep an eye on the place, if Pinkamena comes back write to Celestia, we'll most likely be with her at the time." Twilight said.
"Yes ma'm!" Spike said.
"Alright everyone, let's go!" Twilight exclaimed.
Everyone head outside, to their surprise, Ponyville was completely unscathed.
"That's odd, ah expected there to be a trail of death and destruction in her path." Applejack said.
"Yea, I thought it would be something like what she showed me in her vision." Twilight said.
"I guess she's taking things slow first, trying to keep a low profile." Twilight said. "But what else could she be planning?"
"Ah don't know, but let's not stick around to find out." Applejack said. "Cmon ya'll! Let's go to see the princess!"
At Princess Celestia's Throne Room...
Princess Celestia was sitting in her throne, as she always is, when she received the letter from Twilight.
"Ah, a letter from Twilight, how wonderful." Princess Celestia said.
Princess Celestia read Twilight's letter, her face changed from graceful to discontent.
"Oh my, this is very serious if what she's telling me is true." Princess Celestia said. "However, i'll need to confirm her
suspicions before I take any immediate actions."
Princess Celestia called two royal guards into the throne room.
"Yes, Your Majesty." The two guards said simultaneously.
"I have just received a most urgent letter from one of my students, have their been any unusual reports from those here in Canterlot?" Princess Celestia said.
"Actually Your Highness, There have been a few reports of sightings of an odd pony in a dark outfit, moving around quite sneakily throughout the town." The Guard said.
Celestia's saw that as enough information to confirm Twilight's suspicions.
"Thank you, but now I have a task for you two." Celestia said. "I'm declaring a state of emergency as of now, tell the other members of the royal guard to be on the lookout for a mysterious pony dressed in a black outfit with red streaks."
"Citizens are to say inside their homes until further notice, if the situation gets worse, issue an evacuation." Celestia said.
"And one more thing, try your best not to use lethal force if you encounter this pony, try your best to incapacitate her at best. Celestia said. "The authorization of lethal force is granted if you have no other choice."
The two guards were shocked by the unbelievable order they were given, but agreed to it nonetheless.
"Here is a documentation of it with my signature for those who do not believe you." Celestia said. "Now go."
"Yes, Your Majesty." The two guards said as they left the room.
Princess Celestia sat in her throne, confused about the entire situation.
"Oh Twilight, I hope what your telling me is truly that dangerous." Celestia said.
At Pinkamena's Perspective...
Pinkamena had just entered Canterlot and started to wonder how she would get to the gardens.
"Hmm, Let's see now... I think i'll stick to the rooftops for now, seeing my appearance I would no doubt attract unnecessary
attention." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena hopped from roof to roof, trying to make sure that others didn't see her. She noticed some ponies though however saw her and ran to report their sightings.
"Pfft, I guess i'm not as dexterous as I thought I was." Pinkamena said. "I can't really stop those who saw me, it would cause too much of a disturbance."
"Guess I'll just have to be more careful." Pinkamena said.
Pinkemena continued her way to the gardens until she heard an announcement on the loud speaker.
"Attention citizens of Canterlot! This is a message from Princess Celestia herself." The announcer said.
"Hmm?" Pinkamena wondered.
"She has declared a state of emergency! All ponies are to stay inside their homes at all times starting now until further notice." The announcer said.
"There is a mysterious pony in black within the vicinity who is believed to have destructive intentions." The announcer said.
"Anyone seen outside during the lock down will be dealt with personally, and put under the assumption of being an accomplice to this mysterious pony." The announcer said.
"Report to your homes at once and wait for any further notices, that is all." The announcer said.
After the announcement finished, ponies were running back to their homes as fast as they could, leaving the streets quiet and empty.
"Well well, I must say I didn't expect that." Pinkamena said.
"Princess Celestia calling a state of emergency, only of a few reports of a suspicious looking pony?" Pinkamena said.
"Hehehe... I don't know whether to commend her for making such a decision, or ridicule her for such an outrageous accusation." Pinkamena said.
"Nevertheless, she made the right decision for her subjects." Pinkamena said. "I wonder if she knows how bad the situation is for her actually."
The sky started to get dark, and thunder could be heard while it stared to rain.
"Just what I need." Pinkamena said sarcastically.
"Enough stalling." Pinkamena said. " I better head to the gardens before security tightens."
Instead of jumping on rooftops, she decided to be stealthy on the ground, the rain hopefully making it harder for them to see her. Unfortunately it didn't work in her favor when she was discovered by a guard looking downwards from the rooftops.
"Hey! You there! Stop in the name of the Princess!" The guard said.
"Dang it, he saw me..." Pinkamena said.
"It's you! The pony in the black outfit!" The guard said.
The guard shot a blast of magic into the sky as a signal to the other guards to come and apprehend the pony.
"That's just great..." Pinkamena said sarcastically.
She was soon surrounded by as many as twenty guards in a circle, closing in on her.
"Well, I guess I don't really have a choice now do I." Pinkamena said.
"Sorry guys... But you brought this upon yourselves. Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena jumped extraordinarily high in the air, and came down at incredible speeds towards the middle of the circle. She landed with the strength of a meteorite hitting the surface of the earth and caused an explosion of darkness to erupt from under the ground upwards, launching them all in different directions.
"Hmmph, I told you that you brought this upon yourselves." Pinkamena said. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm supposed to be meeting someone at the gardens."
Pinkamena then ran off towards the gardens before anymore guards showed up.
Other guards who saw the signal came to the location, but were only greeted by the sight of other guards on the ground, either unconscious from the trauma they received from the impact, or writhing in pain on the ground.
The injured guards were rushed back to the castle for treatment.
At Princess Celestia's Throne Room...
A guard rushed in to Celestia's throne room to deliver an urgent message.
"Your Majesty!" The Guard said.
"Yes what is it?" Celestia said.
"We've just recovered about twenty other members of the royal guard from the streets, all severely injured." The Guard said.
"What!? What happened out there!?" Celestia's questioned.
"I don't know the details, but one of the guards we brought in told us the gist of had happened... before he passed away." The Guard said.
"I see..." Celestia said. " Well what did he say? We can't let his dying words go to waste!"
"It was a little difficult to understand, but he said that that pony had supernatural abilities." The Guard said. "He could feel the anger and hate that came with that dark power."
"He also said that the pony was headed towards the gardens to meet someone." The Guard said. "That's pretty much it."
"Headed to the gardens?" Celestia said. "The Royal Sculpture Gardens?"
"Yes Ma'm." The Guard said.
"Hmm, what could be at the sculpture gardens that would pose any value to her?" Celestia said. "And who is she meeting there?"
"I'm just as confused as you are, You Majesty." The Guard said.
Celestia sat there thinking what could possibly be at the gardens, who was this pony meeting? She thought and thought until it finally hit her.
"Wait a second... The Sculpture Gardens... Could it be that she's going to..." Celestia said.
"Discord!" Celestia said. "That pony is probably going to go and try revive Discord from this imprisonment!"
"Are you sure, Your Majesty? Is that even possible?" The Guard said.
"If she's as powerful as you and my student, Twilight, say she is, then she'll have no trouble overcoming the magic that keeps Discord trapped in stone." Celestia said.
"Go now and tell all the guards to report to the Royal Sculpture Gardens at once! This pony must not be allowed to resurrect Discord!" Celestia said.
"Yes, Your Higness!" The Guard said, and bolted out the door. ...
"I never imagined something like this would ever occur." Celestia said. "I have to do everything in my power to make sure that this pony's plans do not come to fruition..."
At Pinkamena's Perspective...
Pinkamena finally made it to the gardens, but was greeted by an immensely large army of Royal Guards.
"I guess I shouldn't have blabbed about where I was going before..." Pinkamena said.
"Yea, you shouldn't have." A Guard said, who then walked forward towards Pinkamena.
"Just who are you anyway?" Shining Armor said.
"Oh so were doing formal greetings now first are we?" Pinkamena said.
"I asked who you were, now talk." Shining Armor said.
"Impatient are we? Fine, but you really should know who I am already." Pinkamena said. "After all, I am one of your little sister's best friends, Hehehe..."
Shining Armor looked carefully at the dark pony until it finally hit him.
"Wait a minute... Pinkie Pie?..." Shining Armor said.
"Bingo." Pinkamena said. |
Pinkamena's Awakening | Reluctant Thoughts | Chapter 6: Reluctant Thoughts
"P-Pinkie Pie!?" Shining Armor said. "What are you doing? Why are you doing this!?"
"I'm going to say this before it starts to get really awkward for you." Pinkamena said. "Pinkie Pie isn't here anymore, You can call me Pinkamena."
"What? What do you mean Pinkie Pie isn't here anymore?" Shining Armor asked. "What exactly is going on?"
Pinkamena sighed in annoyance.
"I've already explained this before many times to those I've encountered, it's starting to get really repetitive and I'm in no mood to explain it again to someone else." Pinkamena said. "So I'll give you the short version."
Shining Armor was confused, he was talking to Pinkie, but it wasn't Pinkie? He couldn't possibly give the order to attack one of Twilight's best friends... could he? He has to listen to "Pinkie's" explanation first before he could decide anything.
"I'm Pinkie's split personality, I took control because I was sick of being stuck in her head, She's trapped instead and now I'm taking my revenge for my imprisonment by destroying whatever proves to be an obstacle in my path." Pinkamena said.
"Wait.. so your..." Shining Armor said, trying to get his thoughts together.
Pinkamena sighed again in disgust of the idiocy and incompetence he had.
"Ugh listen, to put it bluntly." Pinkamena said. "I'm your enemy now, if you decide to get in my way."
Shining Armor had no choice. If she was going to be a threat to the citizens of Canterlot, he had to give the order for Pinkamena's capture, after all it wasn't the same Pinkie they used to know.
"Fine, then if your going to pose a threat to the city, then I have no more reason to delay your arrest." Shining Armor said. "As Captain of the Royal Guard, I will fulfill my objectives!"
Shining Armor raised his hoof and commanded the guards to place Pinkamena under arrest.
"Everyone! I want Pinkamena apprehended immediately! In Celestia's name we will not fail!" Shining Armor decreed.
The guards all got into their positions and started to fire magical blasts from their horns.
"Hmph, guess this is where the fun begins." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena standing in the open with waves of magical bolts coming at her. With a wave of her hoof they all stopped only inches from her face, and were launched back towards the guards.
"Alright, as much as I would love to savor the time of playing around with you weaklings. My patience is wearing thin and frankly I just want to get this over with." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena looked towards the first wave of guards who were blocking her path. She took one step and in a flash she was already behind them, not even a blur to be seen.
"Was that really a good idea Pinkamena?" Shining Armor said.
The first wave of guards turned around and started to close in on her, while the second wave was already moving closer about to surround her.
"Yes actually, I think it was a good idea." Pinkamena said. "Now I can get rid of all you pests in one fell swoop."
Pinkamena gathered her energy, darkness building around her body. Guards fired they're magic at her in an attempt to stop whatever she was doing, but to no avail. She gathered enough energy until her eyes started to glow a bright red, in which she then released it all in one wide spread attack, causing a wave of darkness to fly out, much like Rainbow Dash's Sonic Rainboom. All the guards flew back and writhed in pain as the darkness engulfed each guard it touched with a searing pain, including Shining Armor.
"You know it's really quite funny." Pinkamena said. "How Princess Celestia relies on weaklings like you to protect the kingdom."
Shining Armor got up, ignoring the pain he was feeling from the darkness.
"I can't believe how strong you are." Shining Armor said. "But your crazy if you think that you can overthrow the princess."
"Shining Armor you make me laugh, your precious princess isn't even that strong. She was defeated by the Changeling Queen for goodness sake." Pinkamena said. "I don't think I'll have so much trouble, especially since I'll be getting a new ally..."
"No! I won't let you!" Shining Armor yelled, but was incapacitated by the darkness.
Pinkamena trotted up to the statue of Discord and looked up at it.
"Well Discord, I hope you'll be of some use to me." Pinkamena said. "At least it's better than nothing I suppose..."
Pinkamena was about to place her hoof on the statue, but was greeted by an all too familiar group.
"Pinkamena!" Twilight yelled.
"Whoa..." Rainbow Dash said. "What the heck happened here?"
Everyone looked around to see guards everywhere, defeated and in pain about to be swallowed by the darkness that was enveloping them.
"This is... just awful." Fluttershy said.
"You said it, Pinkamena's not playin around..." Applejack said.
"Hey Twilight." Rarity said. "Isn't that your brother over there?"
"What!? Where!?" Twilight yelled.
Twilight looked over to where Rarity was pointed and saw Shining Armor being engulfed by the darkness, just like the rest of the guards.
"Shining Armor!" Twilight yelled.
Shining Armor looked up to see Twilight through his blurred vision.
"Twi- Twilight?" Shining Armor said weakly.
"Don't move! I'm coming just hold on!" Twilight said, as she was about to sprint down to her brother.
"Hold on one second Twilight." Pinkamena said. "Don't come any closer, or I'll speed up the process of his demise."
Twilight stood there, her face red with anger towards Pinkamena.
"Let go of my brother you demon!" Twilight yelled.
"Demon? That's a little harsh don't you think?" Pinkamena said.
"I don't care! You took Pinkie away from us, but I will NOT let you take my brother away too!" Twilight yelled.
"Yes! Hehehe... all this negativity in the air, it's just simply wonderful! Don't you agree my dear?" Pinkamena said.
Twilight was about to lose it, but luckily she had her friends with her to calm her down and stop her.
"It's so great that your all here actually, I couldn't have asked for a better reunion time." Pinkamena said. "Your brother was a big disappointment by the way, not even a challenge."
"Why you..." Twilight said.
"Easy there Twi, she's just tryin to rile you up." Applejack said.
"I honestly hope that the princess will be a bit more of a challenge when I pay her a visit in a bit..." Pinkamena said.
"Don't you even think about laying a hoof on the princess you!" Twilight said.
"Ohh what's the matter? Did I hit a nerve?" Pinkamena said laughing.
Twilight just stared at Pinkamena, knowing any more negative outbursts would only empower her further.
"What? Just because I'm the manifestation of Pinkie's anger and hate, doesn't mean I can't have a laugh from time to time." Pinkamena said. "Ohh, but I think I've stalled for quite enough now."
Pinkamena turned back around and placed her hoof on the statue.
"Now then." Pinkamena said. "Why don't we say hello to an old friend girls?"
Pinkamena released a burst of dark energy from her hoof onto the statue. The statue started to pulsate and in a matter of seconds... Discord was released.
"Hahahahahaha! Ohh man! It sure does feel good to be able to move again." Discord said, stretching his arms and body.
"Hmm?" Discord said. "Well well well, If it isn't Twilight Sparkle and her friends, how very nice to see you all again!"
"Hmm, but what's this?" Discord said. "It looks like your missing someone from your little group. Tell me, what happened to Pinkie Pie?"
"It's so nice to see again Discord." Pinkamena said. "Though in your case, this will be your first time meeting me."
"Pinkie? Is that you? What happened my dear?" Discord said, laughing.
"Pinkie isn't here anymore and I'm the one who freed you from your imprisonment." Pinkamena said. "I'm her split personality who took over, you can call me Pinkamena."
"You? You freed me? Hahaha! That's rich! As if someone like you would have the strength to overcome the Elements of Harmony!" Discord said, laughing uncontrollably.
"Believe me or not, It's the truth. Now I freed you for one reason and one reason alone." Pinkamena said. "You're going to be partner and do what I say, when I say it. Do I make myself clear?"
Discord started to laugh harder then he ever did, the thought of him taking orders from someone, anyone was just hilarious.
"Oh, my dear you are indeed hilarious. But you're crazy if you think you can boss me around." Discord said.
Pinkamena sighed. "I knew you wouldn't listen to me, so I'm going to say this one more time." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena waved her hoof in the air and surrounded Discord in a veil of darkness, getting smaller and constricting him tighter by the second.
"I didn't have to free you, I don't need you. I only did so because it would make plans go faster." Pinkamena said. "Now I'll ask again. You are going to listen to me and do whatever I say, whenever I say it, Is that clear Discord?"
"Y-Yes, Yes! Alright! You've certainly made your point my dear!" Discord said, struggling to breathe.
Pinkamena released Discord and dissipated the veil.
"You're certainly much stronger than I imagined, I guess that's the kind of power you obtain from being trapped in an idiot's mind for years." Discord said.
"How did you know I was trapped?" Pinkamena said.
"Oh please dear, You're Pinkie's split personalty. You don't look like something that Pinkie Pie would reveal so where else could you be?" Discord said.
"Hmph, good observation." Pinkamena said.
"Now then." Discord said. "What exactly do we do with these five?"
Pinkamena turns to look over at her five "friends".
"Oh yes, them. I completely forgot they were there." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena looked down at the guards and noticed they had been completely engulfed, including Shining Armor.
"Well Discord, I say we move on to see Celestia herself." Pinkamena said.
"Oh, We're already heading there?" Discord said. "I know you want to take revenge and all, but can't we have a little fun first?"
"Taking care of Celestia is my top priority at the moment, when we're done with her you can go and wreak as much havoc and chaos as you want outside." Pinkamena said.
"Well alright then, shall we go then?" Discord said.
"Hold up right there, you're still not done with us!" Rainbow Dash yelled.
"That's it, I've had enough of all these interruptions." Pinkamena said. "I was going to be nice and give you the chance to walk out of here, but you five are clearly too stupid to take my offer to heart."
Pinkamena raised her hood in the air and the guards on the ground started to convulse as the darkness started to seep into them. The guards then all got up, wounds healed and all. But they're armor had turned to a pure black instead of the radiating gold that it was, and they're eyes... All they're eyes glowed a bright red.
"You brought this upon yourselves, I have no more time to waste on insects like you." Pinkamena said.
All the guards lined up and moved towards the five friends.
"They're under my control now, continue to try and pursue me if you wish, but know that you'll be facing an army soon enough." Pinkaemena said.
The guards started to fire black bolts from their horns and burned on impact.
"Pinkamena! We will stop you! Don't even think that you'll get away with th-" Twilight said.
"Yea blah blah blah blah, enough of this, come on Discord we've wasted enough time here." Pinkamena said.
"Yes of course, and I must say my dear, Mind Control, I haven't seen that used in such a long time. You just keep surprising me." Discord said, laughing.
Pinkamena and Discord left the gardens and headed towards Celestia's Throne Room in the castle.
"No! No we can't let the-"Twilight said, who was nothing but awestruck to what was blocking her path.
"N-No.. No this can't be!" Twilight said. "S-Shining Armor! It's me! Your little sister! Twilight!"
Shining Armor was no longer who he was and Twilight's words could not get through to him, he was nothing but a puppet to Pinkamena now.
"Come on Twilight! We can't stay here! There's nothing we can do!" Applejack said.
Twilight just stared at her brother who was consumed by Pinkamena's power. Shining Armor was about to blast Twilight, but she was pulled back by her friends.
"Snap out of it!" Rainbow Dash said. "We have to go! We can't pursue her anymore at the moment!"
Twilight realized she had to abandon Shining Armor for the time being, she and her friends escaped the gardens with minor injuries and fled to the outskirts of Canterlot.
"Well..." Fluttershy said. "Now what do we do?"
"I-I don't know anymore." Twilight said. "Pinkamena's taken over most of the Canterlot Royal Guard, including my brother..."
"Don't worry Twi, I'm sure well find a way to fix everything." Applejack said.
"But how? Pinkamena said she'd have an army by the time we'd get back." Rarity said. "How can we possibly stop her if we're going to be up against the Royal Guard?"
"Not to mention Discord, I can't believe that she freed him!" Rainbow Dash said. "He was enough trouble by himself last time, and now he's with Pinkamena! What do we do!"
They all started to bicker and panic about what they could possibly do, if there was anything they could do.
"Pinkamena said she'd have an army right?" Twilight said. "Then I think we need to get one of our own."
"Where in the world would we get an army large enough to go against the Royal Guard?" Applejack said.
"Think, who is the only other person we know of that stood a chance against the Royal Guard?" Twilight said.
They all stood there pondering for a minute until they realized who she was talking about.
"Wait... You don't mean?" Fluttershy said.
"You can't be serious! We can't ask her!" Rarity said.
"As much as it pains me to say it, Queen Chrysalis just might be our only hope in standing up against the Royal Guard!" Twilight said. "She was the only one who could take the Royal Guard with her army of changelings, not to mention their ability to change their appearance could be very useful."
"We really don't have any other choice here guys." Twilight said.
Everyone looked at each other, they all didn't think it was the best idea but what else could they do?
"Alright Twilight, if you think that the Queen would be willing to help us, then we're with you." Applejack said.
"Yea, I guess we gotta try and hope we get lucky!" Rainbow Dash said.
"I guess we don't really have a choice." Fluttershy said.
"Fine fine, lets go then shall we?" Rarity said.
Twilight was unsure of the plan herself, but she had to try. For her Celestia, for her brother, for everyone.
"Alright everyone, lets head out." Twilight said. "To the Badlands."
At Pinkamena's Perspective...
Pinkamena and Discord had arrived to the door of Princess Celestia's Throne Room.
"Well Pinkamena, this is what you've been waiting for, is it not?" Discord said.
"Yes, it is." Pinkamena said. "Prepare yourself Celestia..."
Pinkamena kicked the door to the Throne Room off it's hinges, no element of surprise that's for sure.
"So you've finally come." Celestia said. "Pinkamena."
"Oh, so you were expecting me?" Pinkamena said.
"I was hoping that Shining Armor and his guards would be able to handle the situation." Celestia said. "But I guess that didn't happen..."
"What have you done with Shining Armor!" Cadence said, sprinting out from the back of the room towards Pinkamena.
Pinkamena waved her hoof and Cadence was ejected forward in front of Pinkamena.
"Don't worry, you can join him." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena engulfed Cadence in a veil of darkness and she was consumed almost immediately, her eyes glowing red and under Pinkamena's control.
"There, now your both my puppets." Pinkamena said.
"Bravo! Once again! Simply wondrous!" Discord said, laughing.
"Your a demon Pinkamena, how could you do such a thing to Cadence!?" Celestia said.
"Being called a demon sure has been happening to me a lot recently." Pinkamena said. "Heh, Oh and I didn't do it to just Cadence my dear, most of your precious guards are under my control."
"Enough, I will not let you continue with your plans, you stop here Pinkamena, and I'll make sure to find a new place to lock you up in Discord." Celestia declared.
"Oh really Celestia, so boring! You were never any fun my dear." Discord said, laughing again.
Pinkamena's Chaos Guards blocked the entrance into the Throne Room and castle in general from the rest of Celestia's Royal Guards.
"Just so we won't be interrupted." Pinkamena said.
"Sister!" A voice called out.
Just as Pinkamena was about to engage Celestia, Princess Luna broke through one of the stained glass window panes to assist her.
"I'm sorry I'm late sister, but I wanted to confirm if Twilight's suspicions were true." Luna said. "But when I saw the castle being blocked off by guards in black armor, I knew something had to be wrong."
"I'm glad you made it Luna, With you here I feel a lot more better about this fight." Celestia said.
"Yes, indeed sister." Luna said. "Together we'll stop this Pinkamena and, hopefully, bring back Twilight Sparkle's friend."
Pinkamena looked directly at Luna and snickered.
"Heh, I didn't expect you to be here, Princess Luna." Pinkamena said. "But now I can kill two birds with one stone."
"Prepare yourself sister, I can see that this will not be an easy fight." Luna said.
"Looks like were going to be in for a wild fight, wouldn't you agree Pinkamena?" Discord said happily.
"Yes, Discord." Pinkamena said. "I think this will be quite fun." |
Pinkamena's Awakening | Purity and Insanity | Chapter 7: Purity and Insanity
Celestia and Luna stood ready for Pinkamena's first move, as they wanted to hopefully get a good read on the levels of her strength from themselves.
"Hmmm." Pinkamena said. "Alright Discord, You take care of Luna, I can handle Celestia by myself."
"She'll be defeated before you know it." Discord said confidently, then dashing towards Luna at full speed.
"Oh no you don't!" Celestia said, charging in front of Discord to cut him off from Luna.
"I don't think so..." Pinkamena said, warping in front of Celestia to stop her.
"Your fighting me princess, and I won't have you running off." Pinkamena said, putting her hoof in front of Celestia's face and forcing her back towards the other side of the room with a blast of sonic energy.
"This is were we'll fight." Pinkamena said. "That alright with you my dear? Hehehehe... I'm sorry, as if you had a choi-"
Pinkamena was interrupted by a blast of Celestia's magic, which was a dead shot in her face and sent her flying into the wall. Pinkamena regained her balance as she pried herself off the wall, surprised at the strength Celestia displayed.
"Heh, a cheap shot attacking me in the middle of my sentence don't you think?" Pinkamena said. "But that was actually a good shot, and it hurt quite a bit speaking honestly."
"After the incident with Queen Chrysalis, I realized how disgraceful it was of me to be defeated to easily, when I am the one who should be protecting my fellow subjects." Celestia said. "So ever since that day I've been honing my skills to make sure that I am ready to overcome whatever evil may befall us."
"Oh I see..." Pinkamena said. "Hehehehe..."
"What's so funny?" Celestia said.
"Oh, I'm just absolutely thrilled that this will actually be a challenge for me!" Pinkamena said. "Now we can have some fun!"
Pinkamena dashed towards Celestia, waves of darkness emitting from her body. Celestia's horn started to glow brighter and brighter until she let out a wave of holy light, it's blinding aura caused the darkness from Pinkamena's body to evaporate instantly.
"What the!" Pinkamena said, now being pulled in by the holy light emanating from Celestia.
Pinkamena was being sucked in by it's power, even with all her strength she couldn't withstand such power. Celestia moved towards her and touched Pinkamena with her horn. Light started to shine through Pinkamena's eyes and mouth as she was burning from the inside out. The pain was immense and she tried to control her screams as hard as she could, she didn't want Celestia to hear her in pain. Pinkamena lifted her hoof up and blasted a wave of sonic energy, not to push Celestia back, but to push herself back away from the light.
"W-What was that!?" Pinkamena said, breathing heavily on the floor and coughing up blood.
"I told you, I've been honing my skills to make sure I'll be able to stop whatever evil may befall us." Celestia said.
"B-But I've never seen you use such a power before... not through Pinkie's eyes..." Pinkamena said.
"I've actually just finished mastering it not to long ago, it exorcises evil and demonic energy from the individual, purifying it from the inside out." Celestia explained.
"Then that means... you're not trying to..." Pinkamena said.
"I have no intention of killing you if that's what your thinking." Celestia said. "How could I do such a thing when your using one of Twilight's best friends as a mere vessel... my only goal is return Pinkie Pie to her former self."
"Tch, You stubborn alicorn you.. you won't be rid of me so easily..." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena got up and summoned a veil of darkness to surround her, encasing her of what seemed to be a floating ball.
"So you're going to hide now? Is that what your doing?" Celestia said.
"Oh no, of course not, just give me a few seconds..." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena dissipated the veil and was coated in her dark energy.
"That's better, all that light inside me was revolting." Pinkamena said. "But now I'm ready for you Celestia."
"If that's what you believe then come on, let's end this already!" Celestia said.
"End it? But it's just started to get interesting..." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena's eye glowed red, and she charged towards Celestia with darkness surrounding her.
"That won't work." Celestia said.
Celesita repeated what she did before, but this time the light wasn't as effective, it was reinforced to act like a shield. Celestia jumped back and fly upwards to avoid the collision and started to shoot blasts of light at Pinkamena. Pinkamena turned around and jumped up towards Celestia and encased herself in a dark ball again, only this time when she got close enough, spikes emerged from the surface, lunging in all different directions. Celestia was able to avoid any fatal hits but was cut in a few places, a slight black flame eating at each of her wounds. Pinkamena dissipated the ball and returned to normal, turning around and facing Celestia.
"Not so easy this time is it Celestia." Pinkamena said.
Celestia was already breathing heavily and Pinkamena looked unscathed, even from the damage she took earlier it looked like she was showing no signs of exhaustion or pain.
"Come on Celestia, let's have some fun." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena lunged towards Celestia again. Celestia dodged her attacks and continued to fight with Pinkamena.
"Sister! Are you alrigh-" Luna said.
"Don't take your eyes off the opponent in front of you!" Discord said, hitting Luna with his tail and causing her to fall back.
(Luna and Discord have been fighting this whole time in case you didn't realize.)
"Now I see why Celestia saw it imperative that you do not escape, you certainly have gotten stronger since the last time we faced you." Luna said.
"That was a long time ago my dear, and I've had plenty of time to think of new ways to spread chaos while being a statue." Discord said. "You on the other hand Luna, you seem to have gotten weaker since the last time we met..."
"Enough of your talk, We are going to stop you right here and now." Luna said, as she charged towards Discord.
"Yea of course you will, Hahaha!" Discord said, mirroring Luna and continuing to fight.
Celestia and Luna... Pinkamena and Discord... Both sides clashed with each other for quite some time, but only one side will emerge victorious.
At Twilight's Perspective...
"Is this the place?" Fluttershy said.
"This is it alright, just being here gives me the chills." Twilight said.
"Well come on! Let's go see the Queen and get this over with!" Rainbow Dash said.
The five friends walked through The Badlands until they reached Queen Chrysalis's Domain.
"You sure she's gonna help us Twilight?" Applejack said.
"What other choice do we have, besides we won't know until we try right?" Twilight said.
"Ugh it's absolutely horrid here! Have these changelings never heard of the word Sanitation!" Rarity said.
Twilight ignored Rarity's comment and they proceeded inside her domain. It wasn't long until they reached her Throne Room.
"Well well well, What do we have here? If it isn't Twilight Sparkle and her friends, have you all come to pay me a visit?" Chrysalis said.
"Queen Chrysalis, we're here because... we need your help." Twilight said, worriedly.
"My help? You foiled my plans in Canterlot and forced me to find an alternative to feed my precious changelings and now you have the nerve to come here! To my own domain and ask for my help?" Chrysalis said. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't have you skinned alive right here and now."
Twilight's friends didn't know what to say, they were absolutely dumbfounded, but Twilight had one thing to say that might change the Queen's mind.
"Queen Chrysalis, please listen to me." Twilight said. "One of our best friends has been taken over by her own split personality."
"Yes, I noticed the pink one wasn't with you." Chrysalis said. "And I should care why?"
"Because that side of her has immeasurable strength, and only wants to wreak havoc and chaos upon the world!" Twilight said.
"Really now? That's quite interesting if I do say so myself." Chrysalis said. "But that still doesn't provide me with a reason to help you."
"But it does." Twilight said. "If she succeeds in causing mass hysteria across the world, how will you feed your precious subjects? Your changelings love to feed on the love and positive energy from those around, but if she, Pinkamena, succeeds then all that there would be is sadness, anger, insanity... need I go on?"
Queen Chrysalis sat there for a moment pondering, thinking about Twilight's explanation.
"We don't have to friends, we don't have to like each other, but right now we need to set aside our differences and help each other out." Twilight said.
"You... You raise a valid point Twilight Sparkle, finding food for my changelings isn't hard at the moment. But if what you say is true, than that last thing I would want to do is doom my entire race." Chrysalis said.
"So does that mean you're gonna help us?" Rainbow Dash said.
"Yes, I will assist you in stopping your friend, but this doesn't mean were friends now." Chrysalis said.
"I understand." Twilight said. "I appreciate you putting aside your hate to help us."
"Yes, I don't seem to have another choice for my changelings now do I?" Chrysalis said. "So where exactly are we going now?"
"Come on everyone, we have no time to lose! Full speed to Canterlot!" Twilight said.
"To save Pinkie Pie!" Applejack said.
"And to stop Pinkamena." Twilight said.
At Pinkamena's Perspective...
Luna laid on the ground, defeated and exhausted by Discord, both covered in cuts and bruises. The same for Celestia, whose injuries were more severe. Pinkamena's darkness was simply too much for Celestia to handle.
"Well then, that was actually a very entertaining battle." Pinkamena said.
"It almost looks like you didn't get a scratch on you." Discord said, breathing heavily. "Or that your even tired."
"I have much more stamina than that of a normal pony, and my healing capabilities are much quicker." Pinkamena said. "Now before I continue on... there is something I need to see."
Pinkamena walked towards Luna and looked at her.
"You... Princess Luna..." Pinkamena said. "You have more power than what you're showing us."
"Wh-What are you talking about?" Luna said.
"Ah yes, I can sense it inside of you, immense power that you once had but now lies dormant." Pinkamena said. "You would make a great addition to my forces..."
"W-What!?" Luna said. "No! Whatever it is your planning don't do it!"
"Oh Luna, you make it sounds like I'm actually going to listen to you." Pinkamena said gleefully. "Now hold still, you won't feel a thing..."
"Luna! My sister! No!" Celestia cried.
Pinkamena touched Luna's head with her hoof and poured in some her dark energy. Luna convulsed a little, her body growing larger in size as her eyes glowed a bright white, and slowly turning to a deep red. Luna has been transformed into her past self, Nightmare Moon, only this time with Pinkamena's power imbued with her, making her that much more deadly.
"Heh, there we go. The brand new you." Pinkamena said. "You will be my personal guard, is that alright with you?"
Nightmare Moon bowed her head at Pinkamena.
"Ha! As if there was any other answer, you're my puppet now anyway." Pinkamena said. "Nightmare Moon is too wordy, so I'll just keep calling you Luna."
Luna walked and took a stance near the throne.
"I'll be there in a minute, just one more thing I need to take care of..." Pinkamena said.
"Y-You monster... how could you do such a thing to my sister... how could you!" Celestia said.
Pinkamena slapped Celestia across the face.
"Shut your mouth, be grateful I haven't killed you already." Pinkamena said. "Should I do that now? What do you think Discord?"
"I think you should keep her imprisoned for a bit, have her watch as her entire world burns before her, Hahahaha!" Discord said, gleefully.
"Ohhh good idea Discord, I like that. It'll be more entertaining for me as well." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena threw Celestia to the other side of the throne and summoned wraps of darkness to constrict her movements.
"Be glad I took away the burning effect from those, that would have been a terrible time for you, Hehehehe!" Pinkamena said.
"Y-You... you won't get away with this!" Celestia said.
"Oh really? I won't get away with this? Who could possibly stop me now Celestia, please do tell me." Pinkamena said.
"Twilight... Twilight and her friends... I know for a fact they'll stop you..." Celestia said.
"Really? You really think those idiots have any chance of stopping me? I mean sure they've pulled through in past but come on now Celestia... really? I don't think the entire land of Equestria can stop me now! Let alone five confused ponies..." Pinkamena said.
"But! I guess we'll see when that time comes won't we?" Pinkamena said. "Until then, Discord you are free to go out and cause whatever mischief you'd like."
"Finally! Hahahaha! Some real fun!" Discord said.
"I only ask that you throw in some real destruction from town to town, not just your little environment changes." Pinkamena said.
"If that's what you want!" Discord said.
Discord flew out of the Throne Room and fly high above. With a snap of his fingers, the desired town bursted into flames. Town after town, they all collapsed and disasters overtook the lands. Ponies from all over were either fleeing to whatever safety they could find, or frozen by the events that occurred, too terrified to comprehend what was happening. It wasn't long before everything was burning.
"Hehehe..." Pinkamena said. " It's really just beautiful... just beautiful."
At Twilight's Perspective...
"We're almost there guys! Come on just a little farther!" Twilight said.
"Um Twi..." Applejack said. "You might wanna stop to look at this..."
Twilight turned around and saw everything... everything was burning... Manehatten, Las Pegasus, Ponyville... all of it.
"I-I don't..." Rainbow Dash said.
"It's just..." Rarity said.
"Come on let's hurry up, we're almost there." Twilight said.
"Twilight!? Don't you even care that everything is burning!? Everything is dying!?" Rainbow Dash said.
"I do care, but do you think that stopping here to stare at it is going to stop it? No it won't" Twilight said. "That's why we have to head over to Canterlot right now and stop Pinkamena!"
Everyone else agreed with Twilight and sprinted towards Canterlot.
"Well everyone..." Twilight said. "We're here."
Canterlot was covered in dark clouds and the sky was red, Pinkamena had already succeeded in taking it over.
"Are you ready guys?" Twilight said.
"Yea! Let's do this!" All of her friends said.
"And you Queen Chrysalis?" Twilight said.
"As ready as I'll ever be I suppose." Chrysalis said.
"Alright then, come on guys we have a friend to save!" Twilight said. |
Pinkamena's Awakening | No Turning Back | Chapter 8: No Turning Back
Twilight and her friends have arrived on the outskirts of Canterlot, along with Queen Chrysalis and her changeling army.
"Alright Twilight, now that we're here what should we do?" Applejack said.
Twilight turned and looked around Canterlot. Pinkamena's Chaos Guardians we're posted all around the perimeter and there were more probably stationed inside the city itself.
"There's too much security, we can't just walk in the front entrance or else they'll spot us immediately." Twilight said.
"Twilight have you forgotten?" Rarity said. "We asked Queen Chrysalis to help us for a reason remember?"
"Yea! Let's just charge right through them and head straight to the castle!" Rainbow Dash said.
"You guys really think that's a good idea?" Twilight said.
"Not to be impatient Twilight, but we really just can't stand here and think of a more subtle approach!" Rarity said. "Pinkamena has already taken over most of Canterlot, it won't be much longer until the rest of Equestria falls under her control."
Twilight knew that Rarity was right, waiting any longer would only create more problems in the future.
"Alright." Twilight said. "Queen Chrysalis, You and your changelings need to hold off Pinkamena's Chaos Guardians so we can make a run for the castle!"
"Alright, but what do you plan to do exactly once you reach her? Do you have some sort of plan for defeating her?" Chrysalis said.
"Yes, that's why you need to hold back her guardians for as long as possible." Twilight said. "We're not going to the Throne Room just yet."
"Then where are we going?" Fluttershy said.
"We have to get to the Elements of Harmony! It's the only way we'll be able to save Pinkie Pie!" Twilight said.
"But will they work?" Applejack said. "I mean, there's only the five of us right now, will it really work without Pinkie?"
"That's the tricky part, we have to find a way to get Pinkie's amulet on Pinkamena's neck." Twilight said. "I'm not sure exactly what will happen, but it's just gotta do something to help defeat Pinkamena!"
"I guess we don't really have any other choice right?" Rarity said.
"Well then what are we waiting for!? Let's hurry up and go get them!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Alright Queen Chrysalis, we're counting on you!" Twilight said. "Let's go everyone!"
Queen Chrysalis's army charged on through and flew all over the city, guardians mindlessly attacking whatever they saw was a threat, bodies dropping from both sides as the battle continued.Twilight and her friends sprinted as fast as they could to the vault which contained the Elements of Harmony.
"Look! We're almost there guys, just a little bit farther!" Twilight exclaimed.
The building that contained the vault was in sight and as they were about to get inside, a very familiar face had been waiting to greet them at the door.
"Well well well, If it isn't Twilight Sparkle and her little friends, trying to stop Pinkamena with the Elements of Harmony, you guys are really way too predictable." Discord said.
"Discord!" Twilight said. "How did you know we were coming!?"
"It's really quite hard to miss an army of changelings walking down the street towards the city." Discord said. "Not to mention the fact that it was really quite predictable that you would show up here in a feeble attempt to save your precious friend."
"We're getting through you and we're getting into that chamber!" Rainbow Dash said. "If you think you can corrupt us again you've gotta another thing co-"
"Yea yea yea, hold on I'm stop you right there." Discord said. "As much as I'd like to toy with you guys and have some fun with this, Pinkamena has told me that if you guys came, I'd have to deal with you asap. So yea that's the sad truth, but it was nice seeing you girls again." Discord said gleefully.
Discord raised his claw and lifted all five of them into the air using his magic, crushing and suffocating them. Before they're vision blurred and started to lose consciousness, the magic was broken and they fell to the ground, gasping for air.
"That was way too close!" Applejack said.
"You ain't kiddin! But what saved us?" Rainbow Dash said.
They all turned to see a swarm of changelings attacking Discord, making him lose his focus on his attack.
"Go!" Chrysalis said. "I'll hold him off here, you get the elements and head to the Throne Room!"
"But Chrysalis! We can't just leave yo-" Fluttershy said.
"Just go now!" Chrysalis said.
All five of them realized they had to go, there wasn't anymore time to think.
"Good luck Chrysalis." Twilight said. "I know you can do it!"
With that comment, Twilight and her friends rushed inside the Vault Chamber.
"Now Chryssie that was not a very smart idea..." Discord said, pushing her changelings away.
"Heh, since when do I have good ideas?" Chrysalis said.
Queen Chrysalis then battled with Discord outside the chamber, sounds of their punches and blows making contact could be heard from the five friends inside the chamber.
"I hope she'll be alright." Applejack said.
"Me to, but I think she's strong enough to hold her own against Discord." Twilight said. "Come on! Let's hurry up and get to the vault!"
They rushed up to the vault which held the elements.
"Uh Twi, how exactly do we open it now?" Applejack said.
"Yes, doesn't Celestia have a powerful magic that only she can break casted on the vault to protect it?" Rarity said.
"She does, but seeing as how most of Canterlot is under Pinkamena's control, I assume that Princess Celestia has been... defeated." Twilight said. "So the protection spell would have gradually weakened because of that."
Twilight walked up to the vault door and kicked it open with little effort. Rainbow Dash flew in and took the chest that contained the elements.
"I hope they're in here this time." Rainbow Dash said.
Rainbow Dash opened the box and thankfully, all six of the amulets were inside.
"I'm surprised Discord didn't try to hide them again." Applejack said.
"Let's be glad he didn't." Twilight said. "Now come on let's head to the Throne Room!"
They all put their amulets on, while Twilight held onto Pinkie's.
"How do we get there though?" Fluttershy said. "I'm sure that if we were to go back the way we came, Discord would definitely capture us!"
"Fluttershy is right, isn't there another way we can take?" Rarity said.
"No, not that I know of at least." Twilight said.
Twilight knew they were right, they couldn't possibly leave the way they came. They had to get out using other means.
"Alright, everyone get close to me." Twilight said. I'm going to try to teleport us directly into the Throne Room."
"Are you sure you can do that Twilight? I don't think you've ever teleported that far of a distance." Applejack said.
"I have to try, we need to get there now!" Twilight said.
All of them huddled closely together, Twilight's horn glowed at unprecedented brightness. Struggling to focus on her spell, her horn reached it's peak of power and with a flash they we're gone.
At Pinkamena's Perspective...
Pinkamena sat there in her throne, Celestia bounded to the ground by chain and Nightmare Moon, under Pinkamena's control, standing next to her.
"I wonder if Discord has taken care of those little annoyances yet." Pinkamena said. "Knowing him though he's probably fooling around with them... he really needs to start taking this serious."
Then in the middle of the Throne Room, a bright light started to form in the center.
"...!?" Pinkamena said.
The bright light got bigger and bigger until it flashed, leaving the five friends in it's place.
"Oh, so you actually made it here." Pinkamena said. "And you brought the Elements of Harmony, what could you possibly hope to achieve with those relics?"
Pinkamena got up from her throne and faced them.
"Twilight!" Celestia said.
Twilight looked over to see Princess Celestia imprisoned.
"Princess Celestia!" Twilight said. "Don't worry! I'll get you out of there!"
Twilight teleported next to Celestia and used her magic to destroy the chains constricting her.
"I knew you would make it." Celestia said. "I've always believed in you Twilight."
"I won't fail you Princess! I will defeat Pinkamena and save Pinkie from her control!" Twilight said.
Twilight ran back to her friends, Celestia now joining them as well.
"Alright Pinkamena, this is where is all ends! We're not letting you do anything else!" Rainbow Dash said.
Pinkamena didn't respond.
"Hey!" Rainbow Dash said. "Are you even listening to me!?"
No response.
"PINKAMENA!" Rainbow Dash yelled.
"Huh? Wha?" Pinkamena said. "Oh sorry, That heartfelt reunion of yours with Celestia was just so boring... couldn't help myself but take a quick snooze."
"Why you!" Rainbow Dash said, about to charge towards here but is stopped by Applejack biting her tail.
"Calm down there Rainbow, that's just what she wants you to do, don't give into her taunting." Applejack said.
"I think I'll let Luna handle you guys, I don't really feel like fighting at the moment." Pinkamena said, sitting back down in her throne.
Nightmare Moon sprinted forward to the group, but was tackled by Celestia, forcing her to the opposite side of the room.
"You five handle Pinkamena, I will hold off my sister!" Celestia said. "I know you can do it!"
Celestia and Luna fight with horns and magic clashing with one another.
"Well Pinkamena, there goes your fabulous plan of letting Luna take care of us." Rarity said.
Pinkamena stood back from her throne and moved towards the group, only this time with a different attitude.
"Alright then fine." Pinkamena said. "If you really think you five have a chance against me this time, then come on! Show me just how much you are willing to save your friend!"
At Pinkie Pie's Perspective...
Pinkie Pie levitated there in her prison, as she as been for the entire time being.
"How long have I been here?... A few days?... Heh... It feels like it's been a few years already..." Pinkie said emotionless. "How anyone could stay sane here is just impossible..."
Pinkie's head drooped down, looking at what seemed to be the ground under her.
"I've seen... I've seen the resurrection of Discord... Canterlot being overrun... The fall of Princess Celestia... What else must I witness here!" Pinkie Pie said, crying.
Pinkie Pie started to have another vision of what Pinkamena is doing.
"...!?" Pinkie said. "No... No not my friends... Anything but my best friends! I can't bear to see them hurt! I can't... I just can't..."
Pinkie Pie closed her eyes, and refused to see the vision of her dear friends facing the demon that was once her...
At Pinkamena's Perspective...
Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy flew towards Pinkamena, while Twilight and Rarity were firing at her from a distance and Applejack was sprinting towards her.
"You guys never learn! Do you!?" Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena dodged Twilight and Rarity's attacks and avoided Rainbow Dash's tackle. Using her dark magic to grab Rainbow's tail, she flings her around and throws her at Fluttershy, both pegasi fly back and fall on the ground, they're wings twisting and bones popping from the impact.
"My wings! I-I can't move them anymore!" Rainbow Dash cried, unable to hold back tears from the searing pain while Fluttershy was already sobbing heavily.
Pinkamena dodges Applejack's kicks and sweeps her off the ground, picking her up by her tail and punching her with great force in her chest. The sound of Applejack's ribs breaking and organs failing could be heard by everyone. Pinkamena then threw Applejack towards the two unicorns.
"Applejack! Are you okay!? Can you speak!?" Twilight said.
Applejack couldn't say a word, the pain that came with speaking at the moment was something that she just could not endure.
Distracted by Applejack, Pinkemena flashes in front of Rarity, not giving her a chance to react in time. Pinkamena grabs Rarity's horn and snaps it in half, kicking her on the ground and impaling her in the stomach with the broken piece. Rarity screamed at the top of her lungs and started to cry, trying to pull the severed horn out of her body.
"I truly expected more." Pinkamena said, grabbing Twilight by the neck and standing her up against the wall.
"Why do you resist?" Pinkamena said. "Is saving you friend really that important you?"
"Pinkie Pie is one of our best friends... and I'll fight for our friendship no matter what!" Twilight said.
"You can not save her though." Pinkamena said, delivering a blow to Twilight's stomach. "All of your actions up to this point have been for naught."
"No... they haven't, because we will... we will succeed in saving our friend! Your nothing Pinkamena..." Twilight said.
Pinkamena punched Twilight repeatedly all over her body, Twilight stood there bruised and bloody.
"No! You can't save her! You can't save this city! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU HAVE ANY CHANCE OF BEATING ME!?" Pinkamena said.
Twilight looked up at Pinkamena's face.
"As long as there is even the smallest glimmer of hope... I will not stop until I defeat you and save everyone!" Twilight said.
Twilight grabbed Pinkamena's cloak, pulling her closer and shoving Pinkie's amulet on her neck. Pinkamena threw Twilight on the ground out of desperation. Pinkie's amulet started to glow it's vibrant pink color, as did everyone else's glow their color.
"Wh-What's happening!? What did you do!? Tell me!" Pinkamena said.
Twilight stood up, seeing Pinkamena trying to rip the amulet off, but to no avail.
"You see Pinkamena, defeating you is not the main thing going through our minds, nor do we have the desire to kill you either." Twilight said. "All we really want, is to just have our friend Pinkie back! And to restore order back to Equestria!"
The five friends' amulets all started to glow a bright, vibrant white light. The purity and clarity that emitted from the light also had that of a soothing feeling to it. The wounds that had been afflicted from before had completely healed and they had felt more powerful than they did before.
"Y-Your wounds! How could they have possibly healed that fast!?" Pinkamena said, trembling.
Pinkamena's amulet also started to glow, but it had a different effect on her. Her powers had been immensely weakened, though still powerful, she was weakened enough for the five friends to now have a fighting chance.
"M-My strength! What happened to all of my power!? This... This irritating light!... It makes my body feel so heavy and... blurs my vision!... Aughhh!" Pinkamena groaned.
Pinkamena backed up towards the throne, unbalanced and wobbly, she could not get a firm stance.
"Alright Pinkamena, this is where is all ends for you." Twilight said.
"N-No! Stay away from me! DON'T COME ANYWHERE NEAR ME!" Pinkamena cried.
Twilight and her friends all charged towards her.
"STAY AWAY!" Pinkamena screamed.
"Pinkamena!" Twilight said. "This ends NOW!" |
Pinkamena's Awakening | Final Words | Chapter 9: Final Words
Twilight sprinted in front of the group and tackled Pinkamena, biting her cloak and throwing her over her body into the center of the room. Rainbow Dash followed up with a downwards kick directly into Pinkamena's cheek, causing her body to slid back with a trail of blood following behind her. Pinkamena pulled herself together, trying to stand up before succumbing to more attacks.
"I don't understand..." Pinkamena thought. "They're attacks are so swift now..."
Applejack delivered a devastating blow to her torso, causing her stagger backwards.
"I can't keep up with them anymore..." Pinkamena thought. "Have the elements really weakened me to a point where I can't even dodge their most simplest attacks?..."
Twilight and Rarity both fired a barrage of magic bolts to her while she was staggered. Pinkamena fell to her knees, her body bruised and smoking from the continuous magic attacks.
"I was at the top of power and I'm losing..." Pinkamena thought. "But after coming this far... I can't... I just can't POSSIBLY LOSE HERE.
"Alright everyone! Now is our chance to finish her off! Fluttershy, would you like to deliver the final blow?" Twilight said.
"Who me?" Fluttershy said. "I-I don't know if I ca-"
"Hey, if anyone's gonna be the star here, it's going to be me!" Rainbow Dash said. "You guys sit down and watch how a pro handles it!"
Rainbow Dash flew towards Pinkamena, about to deliver the final blow.
"Can't lose... can't lose... can't lose... can't lose..." Pinkamena spoke to herself. "No... Not here... Heh heh heh..."
"It's over Pinkamena!" Rainbow Dash said, her hoof about to punch Pinkamena in the face, but was stopped mid-air. "Huh!? Hey! What's going on!?"
Pinkamena stood up and looked up at Rainbow Dash, her eyes bloodshot and her pupils dilated.
"Hehehehe... You shouldn't be so quick to think that you've won..." Pinkamena said.
Rainbow Dash shoved Pinkamena away and flew back towards her friends, fearing what might happen next.
"Watch out guys, she isn't done yet!" Rainbow Dash said. "Let's get he-"
Twilight put her hoof in front of Rainbow to stop her from charging. Twilight looked at Pinkamena and started to walk towards her.
"Twilight! What are you doing!?" Rainbow Dash said.
Twilight disregarded Rainbow's question and proceeded towards Pinkamena. Twilight looked her, her body bloody and beat up, her face bruised and eyes showing only hate.
"What are you going to do!? HUH! You think you can beat me!?" Pinkamena said.
Twilight walked closer and closer to Pinkamena, Pinkamena shot a blast of darkness towards Twilight, but missed.
"You take one step closer and you can make sure that I won't miss a second time!" Pinkamena yelled.
Twilight just walked closer with a smile on her face.
"I'M WARNING YOU! COME CLOSER AND I WILL KILL YO-" Pinkamena screamed.
Twilight raised her arms at Pinkamena... and hugged her.
"...!?" Pinkamena said. "Wha-What are you..."
"I've thought about it for a while now, and I finally realized why you're doing all of this." Twilight said.
"Wh-What do you mean!? How could you possibly understand my motives!" Pinkamena said.
Twilight released herself from Pinkamena.
"It's so simple, yet so complicated at the same time." Twilight said. "You and Pinkie were once the same person long ago, but you were locked away into her mind when she saw that Sonic Rainboom."
"I already know this! I'm the one who told you what happened in the first place!" Pinkamena said.
"Yes, and because of that you yourself have never experienced what it feels like to have friends, to laugh and play with them." Twilight said. "To feel happy."
Pinkamena backed up a bit.
"S-So? What does it matter if I haven't experienced love or happiness or whatever! Just look at how strong you can become without those stupid emotions holding you back!" Pinkamena said.
"Alright then" Twilight said. "Just what do you plan to do then when your plans succeed and you take over everything and everyone in Equestria?"
"Well that's simple, I would... I would..." Pinkamena said.
"You might be the most powerful being at the moment, thriving off anger and hate from everyone else." Twilight said. "But when you look at the big picture, you have absolutely nothing to gain in the end."
Pinkamena stood there, confused and angry at herself.
"Well then what else am I supposed to do!? I was pretty much created in all forms of negativity! It's all that goes through my mind! IT"S WHO AND WHAT I AM! WHAT ELSE IS THERE THAT I CAN DO!?" Pinkamena yelled, walking closer to Twilight. "What...else?"
Twilight waved her friends to come here, and extended her hoof at Pinkamena.
"What are you doing?" Pinkamena said.
"I'd like to be your friend Pinkamena." Twilight said.
Pinkamena's eyes widened, completely shocked of Twilight's request.
"Y-Your friend!? Are you serious!?" Pinkamena said. "I resurrected Discord, took over the Royal Guard, destroyed most of Canterlot and the other towns and cities and nearly killed you guys and you're asking me to be your FRIEND!?"
"It's not your fault that you were created in isolation from the rest of the world, something like you isn't even supposed to exist." Twilight said. "But I guess since it's Pinkie we're dealing with, anything is possible right?
"Twilight's got a point." Applejack said. "Heck it isn't your fault that you came out this way."
Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity all nodded their head in agreement.
Pinkamena stood quiet for minute, she turned around and looked at Celestia still fighting Nightmare Moon. She closed her eyes and raised her hoof, the dark energy that was controlling Luna left her body and went back to Pinkamena. Luna fell to the ground, returned to normal. She then turned around and looked at Twilight again.
"You don't blame me... for everything that I've done..." Pinkamena said. "and then you ask me to be friend..."
Pinkamena turned her head and she started to cry.
"Ever since I escaped my imprisonment, all anyone's ever displayed is fear and violence towards me..." Pinkamena said.
"You're the first person to have ever showed me any kindness whatsoever..."
"I'm sorry it took me a while to realize, but no one can blame you for your actions Pinkamena." Twilight said, putting a hoof on Pinkamena's shoulder.
Pinkamena walked away towards Princess Celestia, who was sitting down with Luna.
"I... I want to apologize for everything I've done..." Pinkamena said. "But I don't expect you to forgive me for what I've done to you and your subjects..."
Celestia waved Pinkamena to come closer.
"I heard what Twilight said before, about you and how you came to be." Celestia said. "and I want to say that I agree with them."
"R-Really?" Pinkamena said.
"Mhm, I understand that your creation was unintentional, and that you were only formed from negativity." Celestia said. "With that being the only thing exposed to in your confinement, I'm not surprised this is how you turned out."
Pinkamena turned around and looked at Twilight again.
"Such understanding... I never thought I'd be graced with it... Hehehehe..." Pinkamena said. "Pinkie Pie really does have some great friends."
"You have nothing to be ashamed of Pinkamena, it's just who you are I suppose." Twilight said, with a laugh.
"Thank you... Twilight Sparkle." Pinkamena said, who then smiled for the first time. "This feeling... It makes me feel... relaxed... Heh... Could this be what I wanted all along?..."
"I'm glad to see that you've had such a change of heart." Twilight said.
"Well Twilight, as I've said I have you to thank for that." Pinkamena said. "In return... I will release Pinkie, and give her back her body..."
"You will?" Twilight said. "But then what will happen to you?"
"I'll return to the prison that I was held in my entire life..." Pinkamena said. "Obvious is it not?"
"What!?" Twilight said. "You're going to go back there?"
"I don't have any other choice Twilight, it's where I was created... so it's where I'll return..." Pinkamena said.
Twilight became heartbroken, helping Pinkamena realize how it feels to be accepted, rather then resented... only to have her sent back to complete solitude again.
"Do not pity me Twilight, as much as I appreciate your feelings... There isn't any other choice." Pinkamena said. "Besides, I can't stay here... I was never supposed to exist in the first place... Heh... It's kind of funny don't you think?... I spent my entire imprisonment trying to get out of there... and now all I want to do is go back..."
Twilight and her friends started to cry a little, even Rainbow Dash shed a few tears.
"Goodbye Twilight... and thank you." Pinkamena said.
Pinkamena's eyes started to glow a bright white and after a few seconds, her body collapsed onto the ground.
"Pinkamena!" Twilight said, all of them running towards her body.
At Pinkie Pie's Perspective...
Pinkie was still in her floating prison, eyes closed, trying to ignore whatever horrors Pinkamena created. Pinkie started to hear footsteps though however in the distant void.
"Huh?... Is... someone there?" Pinkie said.
The shadowy figure started to walk closer and closer to her until she was visible.
"...!?" Pinkie said. "Pinkamena!? Wh-What are you doing back here?"
"Hello Pinkie Pie." Pinkamena said. "Tell me, how does it feel to be stuck here for only a few days?"
"It's... horrible. I can't blame you for the way you came out..." Pinkie said. "But even so... if you hurt my friends in any way I swear I'll never forgive you!"
Pinkamena started to laugh a little.
"What? What's so funny?" Pinkie said.
"Your friends are alright Pinkie." Pinkamena said. "and I'm here to say that... I'm setting you free."
"You're... letting me go?" Pinkie said.
"Yes, I'm returning to my prison here of my own free will." Pinkamena said. The chains slowly unraveling from Pinkie's body and moving to constrict Pinkamena once again.
"But... why?" Pinkie said. "You've spent your entire life waiting for the chance to escape and now you're choosing to return? I don't understand..."
"Hmph, it was your friend Twilight Sparkle, who was the first person to ever show me any acts of kindness..." Pinkamena said. "Something that I've never experienced myself before..."
Pinkie started to feel more sad than happy to the fact that she could leave at the moment.
"Are you actually feeling sad towards me?" Pinkamena said.
"Well yea..." Pinkie said. "I mean... if you stay return here, won't you go back to losing your mind again?"
"I don't think so..." Pinkamena said. "I think I'll fine for the most part now..."
A white portal then opened behind Pinkie, so that she may return to her body.
"Go Pinkie, return your friends." Pinkamena said. "and continue living your happy-go-lucky life."
Pinkie looked back at the portal, and then turned back to look at Pinkamena.
"...I promise..." Pinkie said. "I promise! One day I'll help you leave this place for good! Don't you forget that!"
Pinkamena's eyes widened, as she started to laugh to herself.
"Hahaha!... You really are something else." Pinkamena said, signaling Pinkie to go through the portal.
Pinkie looked at Pinkamena, they both smiled at eachother, and Pinkie turned around and went through the portal. ...
... ...
Pinkie Pie opened her eyes, everything was blurry at first, but when she came to she was surrounded by her friends
"Pinkie?" Twilight said. "Is that you?"
"Ughhh... Twilight? I-Is that you?" Pinkie said. "Aughhh, my head hurts... and I am wearing Pinkamena's cloak?"
Twilight and her friends all ran to hug Pinkie Pie, everyone laughing and happy to see Pinkie back to normal.
"Ohhh Pinkie! We're so glad that you're back!" Twilight said.
"Aww thanks guys! It's really great to be back!" Pinkie said. "But... it was weird... Pinkamena returned to her prison of her own free will... what did you say to her to get her to do that?"
"I just thought that I'd offer to be friends with her, since no one has ever tried being nice to her." Twilight said. "It worked... but I was honestly depressed a little when she just left..."
"I'm very proud of you Twilight." Celestia said. "I always knew that you could do it."
"Thank you Princess Celestia." Twilight said. "But it wasn't so much a victory as it was a loss..."
"I understand where you're coming from my dear student, but there was nothing else that we could do at the moment." Celestia said.
"I guess you're right Princess." Twilight said. "I only wish their was..."
Queen Chrysalis then comes into the Throne Room.
"Twilight" Chrysalis said. "I assume you've won?"
"Chrysalis, I'm so glad you're okay!" Twilight said.
"Ohh how thoughtful of you" Chrysalis said, sarcastically.
"What happened with Discord and the guards?" Twilight said. "And my brother!? What happened to Shining Armor!? Oh! And Cadence! What happened t-"
"Calm down there, all the guards, including Shining Armor and Cadence were lifted from Pinkamena's control shortly after you defeated her." Chrysalis said. "And Discord was returned to a statue in the midst of out battle."
"Oh thank goodness!" Twilight said. "Thank you so much for helping Queen Chrysalis."
"Don't think this makes us friends or anything now, the next time we meet we're enemies once more." Chrysalis said, leaving the Throne Room with her changelings.
Twilight walked outside and saw Canterlot itself in ruins.
"It looks like we still have a lot of work to do if we want to return Canterlot, and the rest of Equestria, back to normal." Twilight said.
"Twilight is right." Luna said. "Just because Pinkamena is gone, doesn't mean the damage she caused will disappear as well."
"Ohh my sister! I'm so glad you're alright now..." Celestia said.
"Yes sister, I'm fine now." Luna said. "But Twilight is right, we have much work to do if we want to fix everything."
"You're right." Celestia said. "Come Twilight and friends, we have a lot of work to do."
"Come on everyone." Twilight said. "Let's go"
They all left the Throne Room except Pinkie, who was sitting there in thought.
"Come on Pinkie Pie!" Rainbow Dash said. "We got a job to do!"
"Oh yea sorry Rainbow, I'm coming!" Pinkie said, following her friends outside the castle. ...
... ...
"Heh... look at that... so many things are in ruin and so much work must be done in order to fix it..." Pinkamena said. "She might be an odd, weird, and somewhat annoying pony... but she's a good friend... and she always keeps her friends smiling..."
The End |
Pinkamena's Awakening | Author's Note | Author's Note
Hello everypony, Please bear in mind that this is my very first fic, its not going to be the best, some parts will probably unintendedly be left unexplained, and things might not be clear. I'm sorry to those of you who felt a lot of things were unclear to you, or not explained in more depth, but this is all I have at the moment I'll be thinking about writing another fic in the future, Pinkamena's Awakening was in all honesty a "rough draft" if I was any good at writing fics and based on most of the positive comments, I think I'll continue writing in the future and I'll try and learn from the mistakes I've made here.
But what do you guys think? To some/most of you, the ending was meh and ended to quickly I understand but was my story good in general? I'd like to hear your feedback to see if I did a decent job at the very least ^~^.
Also, a sequel is possible in the distant future and I'd like to ask all of you, how would you like me to approach it? Would you like me to turn Pinkamena evil again? Or find a way to completely separate her from Pinkie and try to be a nice person?... |
Excerpts from the Luna War | pre | The way Starswirl said that made me a little anxious, as if suddenly Equesria had stood up and said it trusted in me and whatever non existant wisdom it believed I had. Or at least the greatest unicorn in the nation had done so. I opened my mouth to speak, but just ended up closing it wordless, not sure what to say to him. All he did was nod understandingly, looking past me and through a window out onto Canterlot.
"I know you do not believe it, but I feel you have what it takes to set things right. At very least you have the genuin desire to, not like these vultures that seem to surround us fully."
His words were heartwarming and encuraging at a time when I felt in over my head and lost in a sea of confusing dangers. At very least I felt, I finally had found a pony I could trust with my thoughts, without endangering anypony in doing so. I stayed with him for now, asking him for all the answers and explantions I was not smart enough to find myself. |
Excerpts from the Luna War | History | "Look at those pompous bastards, I don't trust this one bit..."
The muttered agreement that had started to arise was quickly silenced by a watchful and powerful glare from Luna herself, making it obvious that she did not appreciate such an undiplomatic statement.
We had just crossed the border into Gryphon territory and were being escorted by a force of what I recognized as the kings guards, their fancy and perfectly fitted armor obviously a sign of power and wealth used to intimidate anyone who would consider stand against their king's empire.
I glanced over to our queen as she trotted along, her expression perfectly blank, not showing what all of us full well knew, on any other occasion she would have agreed with her subjects outburst. Instead, today she had silence him and remind all of us that this was a mission to create peace, and we should put aside out prejudice.
And yet, she had brought with her a sizable force of well trained and trusted ponies, and do to some unimaginable luck, I had been part of this force.
"First time outside of Equestria for you, right?"
The pony to my left asked as we marched, the pony I knew as Fireflight was a bright red pegasus pony, not much older then me and somehow still always happy to remind me of his great adventures and deeds. I did not mind, it was my first time out on a real mission and somehow his tales only increased my desire to see action. Smiling softly I nodded and then replied.
"Yes, there are few reasons to leave Equestria in the first place, much less so when you spend most of your life at the academy to become part of Luna's forces."
I said somewhat absentmindedly as I looked around, the terrain ahead of us was rather hilly and difficult for earthpony's and unicorns to traverse. From what I had read much of the Gryphon's empire was mountain or hill based, their natural ability to fly had made these territories easier to defend, and conquer.
"Well, technically you are not outside of Equestria just yet..."
This time the voice came from my right, much older and coarse then Fireflight's. This pony was a dark grey unicorn with a fierce scar across one eye, a deep cut akin to that caused by a talon, and a dark metal armor adorned with some of the most famous medals Equestria had given out.
I had not expected to be talked to directly by such a legend and for a moment I almost tripped on a rock, having to stop in my march for a moment to catch myself. The display drew a annoyed muttering from the pony behind me, which almost walked into my stationary body but without another word I kept going, hoping the mess up had not been seen by Luna.
Doing my best to respectfully look toward the unicorn who had addressed me I spoke somewhat timid, unsure what he wanted me to reply to such a statement.
"I... well.. current border.--"
The other pony cut me off with a huff and looked over my shoulder at one of the gryphons that was escorting us, then back at the forces we had brought.
"For most of my life have I, and Equestria, have fought these treacherous beasts. We have won, and we have lost wars to them... But it is a mistake to let them get away with this, these are our lands and we should not surrender them to our enemy like this."
Another murmur spread across the marching ponies, and gryphons, as both sides knew that words like this could end the uneasy peace which had been laid. And it was obvious that both sides had their share of eager participants. I simply held my tongue and quietly marched onward. The idea of battles and glory had been in my mind for much of these past days, but now that we had left our own territories and were flanked by enemies at all sides my desire for a fight was strongly diminished. And as we continued forward both ponies and gryphons grew tired and the uneasy peace was held at least for one more day.
When it was time for the night to fall our forces stopped to set up camp and give Luna time to raise the moon. It had always baffled the inhabitants of Equestria how the Gryphon's could dare to assault territories held by those that could raise and lower the celestial bodies, but seemingly our enemy depended on the fact that no matter what happened, our goddesses would not let the world burn under an eternal sun, or freeze under an eternal moon.
When I finished setting up the tent for me and my two companions, I let out a soft sigh and threw myself onto my makeshift bed, pulling out one of the books I had brought with me for this journey.
The title read "The split Empire and the Day's before Equestria.". With a rustling of fabric the tent was opened by Fireflight, who quickly stepped inside and threw himself on his own bed beside mine. Giving a glance at my book he let out a laugh rolled his eyes at me.
"You have been reading that damn book every night since our trip started, what is it with you and your obsession about pre-Equestrian times?"
I sighed, it was not the first time he had bugged me about my reading habits, but he also had never been so intrusive about it, after a moment's thought I decided to indulge him.
"For one, this book was given to me by my little brother in Canterlot, on the day of my departure. He said that he didn't want me to get bored out there."
The red pegasus looked at me, seemingly surprised by my mention of a brother I had never brought up. Before he could reply I continued.
"For another, this book is surprisingly fascinating... I know it sounds weird, but it talks about so many things that are never mentioned when you learn about history."
This time Fireflight decided to indulge me, giving the book a poke with his hoof before speaking.
"Like what?"
Looking at the open book and flipping to a specific page, one with a pre-Equestrian map on it, I hold it out to him and start to explain.
"Even though we are never told much about them, there are times before Equestria was founded. And in those times the region that is now Equestria had many smaller nations in it. And two of those nations were led by what are now our Queens. Luna in the North, and Celestia in the east. Back then however they were not actually allies, and even though some theories state that the two have a common origin, they often had conflicts between their lands. As the decades past however both nations grew and the smaller factions around them decided to become part of either the 'Lunar Empire' or the 'Celestial Empire'. "
The pegassio stallion rolled onto his back and stared up at the fabric of the tent, but his ears were still perked up and listening, whether he was trying to appease me or genuinely interest though was impossible for me to tell, but I continued eitherway.
"After only those two nations were left the ponies of each began to see each other as a threat to their way of life. Luna's empire, while reign with love and affection, was cold to outsiders and had strong militaristic traditions. It is believed that this was do to her sharing borders with the ever violent gryphon and dragon tribes to the north, which later became the Gryphon Empire that we still war with so often. Celestia's ponies however did not understand why their neighbors and kin would not accept them into their land, growing paranoid and wishing for Celestia to reassure things would not grow into open conflict."
At this point Fireflight turned his body toward me once more, looking at the book with a rather curious fascination, seemingly the history lesson having caught his interest indeed. After a short moment to catch my breath I turned the book toward a new page, one which showed a map of the borders of the Celestial and Lunar Empire's at their height, just before Equestria as we knew it was founded.
"When the distrust between the two equestrian nations continues to grow and things threatened to become unstable, Celestia and Luna met, alone, ontop of the tallest mountain between their two empires." I pointed a hoof at the place on the map, which my red friend would recognize as today's Canterlot. "There supposedly they argued for days about terms of an unending peace. The exact events are impossible to tell as only the two goddesses were present, but after they returned, both announced that the Celestial and and Lunar Empire's would be abolished, and in turn Equestria would be born, a nation that accepts all of pony kind and will defend each other with united might. And the new Capital, as we all know, was Canterlot, the palace build supposedly on the very place where their argument had taken place."
Fireflight stared at the book thoughtfully for a few moments, and then gave a smirk. Speaking in a somewhat more respectful tone.
"I guess your brother got pretty good taste's when it comes to books. Not sure what any of this will do for you out there, but at least that explains why Equestria has always felt so... divided."
I gave a solemn nod, now putting down the book and being the one to roll onto my back. Staring up at nothing particular as I spoke.
"I know what you mean... what they did was the right thing, Equestria is better off as one, rather then two. But sometimes it feels like many ponies have yet to accept that they are subjects of both goddesses, not just the one that has caught their heart and mind."
Once I finished speaking and silence fell for I took note that outside things had quieted down too, most likely the official order for sleep having gone around the camp and the nights curfew keeping everyone not on duty confined to their tents. Yawning quietly my Pegasus friend spoke once more.
"I am sure that in due time they will come around, I believe that a few generations from now all ponies will consider themselves truly Equestrian, and no one will question the authority of either of the two goddesses, the way it should be."
Silently agreeing with him I closed my eyes and tried to focus my mind. I could not help but wonder where my loyalties lay, could I say that the the loyalties to my queens are equal? |
Excerpts from the Luna War | Lies | I looked around in uncomfortable awe at the council hall before me, filled with ponies of greater age and rank then me. They had been expecting Celestia, but not me. Their eyes focused on me, the anomaly non of them had expected. Doing my best to stand calm and tall beside my princess I was saved by her call for attention. She took her place among the other ponies and beckoned for me to stand beside her as she spoke.
"I have been informed, this meeting was called because you are restless and wish to hear the retaliation to my sister's deeds? Let us once more then go over the events that have brought us here."
There was short moment of silence, the ponies of the council still resting their curious eyes on me, but then one of them spoke up.
"Luna has returned to her old capital and called her followers to arms. As you asked we dispatcher messengers, but non has returned to us and some fear the worst."
There was another short silence and a different pony, this one not wearing the pin of a high ranked council member but instead that of a mayor spoke up.
"The ponies of Shimmerglail are terrified by the reports of unrest close to our city. I have come here to ask for protection and can confirm the rumors that our northern kin have begun to arm themselves, gathering forces at Hoofington."
Celestia glanced over the ponies present, including me, and then smiled in that warm and compassionate way she had mastered.
"Your city will come to no harm my little pony. All of this will be settled without the need of bloodshed. If these reports are indeed more then just paranoia driven fabrications and Luna has gathered an army then we have to trust in her judgment and goodwill."
The wave of displeasure which passed through the room was noticeably even to me, as if the majority of the council had already agreed to disagree with Celestia's decision. The first to speak was the same pony which had earlier infromed Celestia of this meeting, his expression disappointed but diplomatic.
"We are here to advice our queen, not make decisions for her. However, your love and faith in Luna should not come at the risk of your subjects. If Luna is allowed to gather an army of subjects loyal to her, and only her, then the authority of Equestria is at risk. Even if her intent is just, the consequences are too great. I advise we send the royal army to subdue the unrest and bring Luna back for her to be judged by your wisdom. Once she is here it will be easy to make clear of this mess and return Equestria to stability."
The majority of ponies present seemed to agree with this judgment more, many of which tried to voice their support and persuade Celestia of the wisdom in their view.
"The ponies of Equestria should not have to fear their own. Luna's actions have reawaken a divide all of us have long worked to subdue."
"If we let Luna do as she pleases other ponies might follow suit, Equestria might crumble back into the pieces that assembled it!"
"The gr---"
The last pony was silenced by Celestia's voice, as she spoke up above all of them, making her words heard in a manner that could not be argued.
"I will not have this talk about your queen, all of you owe Luna as much loyalty as you do me. Equestria will not fall apart from rumors and superstition. This army is an Equestrian army, led by one of you queens. It will not cause harm to its own folk."
A large number of the council ponies seemed outraged by this, but non of them had a chance to voice their disagreement as Celestia continued to talk.
"We will not act against Luna. We will wait and see what her actions bring..."
The mood in the council hall had become cold, many of the ponies present looked with plain disapproval onto their queen's words, glances flowing from one to another.
As a guard I was taught loyalty and faith in my queens above everything else, to see these ponies be so ready and willing to fight their queen's judgment worried me. But this train of thought was cut short by yells from outside the hall, catching everypony's attention. Only a moment later the two golden doors were swung open, and revealed my supervising officer, with an expression marked by confusion. His voice too was shaken by uncertainty and fear.
"M..My Queen! The moon.. it.. has blocked out the sun!"
The whole room fell quiet, all eyes resting on our goddess of the sun. Her always confident and warm stance was now finally showing a crack and I could see her mouth silently word something. The silence held for too long, the unease setting itself in my body and sending a shiver down my spine, till it was broken by one of Celestia's many advisers.
"I.. it pains me to say this.. but my queen, you can not possibly stay passive after this. If we wish to advert public misunderstand and panic we need Luna back here in Canterlot, to explain herself..."
There was a momentary pause in the ponies words, till he seemed to have gathered his courage. "and answer for her actions.."
The expression my goddes held in that one moment was earth shattering, destructive to the core. The pony with the power to raise the sun, looking toward the floor in shame and fear of the only path left to her. The way she slowly nodded, avoiding eye contact with her own advisers.
"I... do not believe I have clarity of mind to rule over this. I wish no one harmed, but you have permission to send the royal guard. To subdue the... rebel forces, and bring back Luna so she can explain herself."
Having said those words she turned herself away from the council of ponies, and walked away from them, leaving the specifics in their power. I still stood there, utterly baffled and shocked by these events, lost in a haze of questions as the ponies around me already started to debate what part of the royal guard forces to send, and what orders to give them. I would probably have been too shocked to follow any of it anyway, but once Celestia had left I too was hushed outside. I returned to the place I had first talked to Celestia today, and look out over the balcony, and the city of Canterlot. A few hours ago it had been beautiful, now, in the utter darkness of an eclipse, I could feel only fear of the future we had to face. |
Excerpts from the Luna War | Devotion | Slow and cautious knocking drew my attention away from the map I had spend the last hours looking over, or at least pretend to myself to be doing so. Finding my surrounding to have changed not at all over the last hours my heart sunk only more, there were still splatters of blood and dead ponies laying across the tavern floor. Even the owner had not been willing to face the actions that had happened here, and everywhere else in this city. Without a word I shake of the feeling of despair and rose from my seat, dragging myself to the door and heartlessly open it, coming to face with an orange Pegasus who looked not much better off then myself. His feathers and mane were in tethers, his expression one of complete uncertainty mingled with fear, his voice was shaken as he addressed me.
"My Sir, the Queen has requested your presence at her throne room. She asked me to escorted you there --"
Taking a deep breath I stepped forward, pushing past the Pegasus and looked up at the sky, taking in the surreal nature of it, not a pony in Equestria would be able to feel save under it's alien nature. It was neither day nor night, it was a soulless gray that seemed to glow with a slight hint of blood red.
"I won't have any problem making my way there on my own." I said, looking back, over the Pegasus and into the tavern. "I want you to find some help and..." I fell quiet, the uncertain eyes of the expectant pony looking at me, and me looking in shame at my own work. After a silent moment I pointed a hoof at the door, and the chaos inside.
To my pleasant surprise the other pony seemed to have understood and nodded quickly, hurrying off to find himself some help with the newly assigned task. Leaving me free to turn away from the horrific sight, and instead to face the ruined city instead.
Its buildings were intact, its citizens alive, and yet... our souls, our morals... dead.
As I made my way across the streets, passing fellow soldiers and Luna supporters I did my best to break my mind from the thoughts that had been haunting me for the past day. My thoughts however would not leave me be, and time and time again I came to the same realization. What I had done would forever be remembered, by me, and everypony in Equestria.
Finally, I shook my head and raised my head, focusing my eyes on the sky, the never ending twilight reassuring me. What I did was for the good of Luna, and Equestria, what had to be done.
Holding to my new found faith I made my way up the steps of Luna's palace. The guards looked at me for only a moment before wordlessly opening the doors, allowing me to step inside.
In a stark contrast to everything else, this palace was perfectly clean and tidy, the red carpet between my hoofs warm and soft. Slowly I followed it, each step bringing me closer to the pony I had devoted my life to.
At the end of this silent walk I found two open doors, and past them the Queen of the Moon. Sitting on her throne, her gaze focused on me.
When my eyes met hers something stirred inside me I had never before felt in her presence, fear. She said nothing, and yet her silence told me all I had to know, she wanted me to step closer. My body struggled against my orders to move closer, as if suddenly the goddess I had been willing to die for had become a wild beast to be kept at distance. But soon I overcame myself and my hoofs carried me forward, I lowered my head and hoofs, bowing to her.
With less distance between us now, I could see more clearly what had made me react to strangely to her. Her form had subtly changed, her face elongated, her body grown to be more then twice the size of a pony. Her coat now a pitch black and her mane and tail strangely translucent, shifting and swirling around her as if with a mind of their own. And the eyes, gleaming with such determination and dominance that it petrified my body.
As I stood there, frozen in place and holding my breath, I tried to understand why her appearance would change as it had.. It is true that there are only two known alicorns, and both hold powers and secrets non of us can fathom, it is why they are gods and not ponies. But never had we seen our queen change shape, never had we known she could. Her voice too had changed, so when she spoke a chill ran down my spine, no warms and compassion, but instead cold steel like strength, and a hint of sorrow.
"We owe to you not only our freedom, but also this throne. However, with our victories comes a great price, for us and everyone who follows. You can already see the change that has befallen us, but the same hideous darkness has taken its toll on all ponies in this city, they just do not understand it yet."
There was a heavy silence as those she let me dwell on those words, wondering what she meant, and yet full knowing the answer. Doing my best to break through the weight her gaze brought on me, I raised my head tall and looked back into her eyes.
"We did what had to be done, what would in the end be best for all Equestria. You know this to be true my queen! Our actions might have destroyed the innocents of ponies, but if we had not acted so much more would be lost."
Luna's gaze did not waver, but I could see that she was truly surprised by my determination. A small smile spread across her night black face, acting like a light in the dark. Her voice too had subtly changed, some of its warms returning.
"Your faith in our cause, and your queen, is heartwarming even to a goddess who feels cold as the night. However, you must understand that I did not chose to change in this way. This conflict has brought to light a side even I fear." and as she said that, for one moment I could see in those eyes terror, uncertainty. "Part of my mind is no longer my own, it thinks alien thoughts and have alien desires... that day.."
The tall and twisted representation of my queen stood up from her chair, and trotted toward me, bringing her head to the height of mine, and speaking in a serious tone.
"By the time we win, I might not be the pony you or any of them first set out to protect and support. I might be worse then any Gryphon or Dragon that has ever terrorized this land. You would have to live with having brought my a tyrant to the ponies of Equestria. Do you really wish to take that chance?"
At first her words seemed almost silly to me. Yes, her physical appearance scared me, but she was still Luna, the loving goddess who protected her ponies every night, she would never harm us. And yet, as the time passed and the seriousness of her expression stayed, I knew she was truly scared of this outcome.
But she was my Queen, and I had gone so far for her already, to turn back now would betray everypony who had risen to protect her. No, if we backed down now, the other races would take advantage of Equestria's weakness. Without Luna to protect us, Equestria would fall. She is our goddes, and if we can't trust her, then there is nothing we could trust. Even though I spoke with honesty and faith behind me, my voice was notably shaken as I bowed to Luna once more.
"If that is what we have to do to protect the ponies of Equestria, to keep you in power, then I am fully willing and able to take that risk. Everything you have done has been for our good. You might think yourself a monster, but I know that in the end you could never bring harm to those you love, us, your loyal subjects."
For a moment I was unsure how Luna had taken to my words, for she did not reply at first. But then, to my surprise and disbelieve, she places her muzzle to the top of my head. A sign of care and affection, normally withhold to those that we hold dear in our heart. She then just as wordlessly withdrew her muzzle and turned to walk back up the stairs to her throne. Still bewildered by her action I quietly watched as she sat down and nodded at me. Her terrifying form suddenly looking so much more familiar to me. Her words boomed with determination and purpose, a desire to see this through.
"It is time for us to bring an end to this, to meet and confront my Celestia." |
Excerpts from the Luna War | Wrath | I tried my best to hide the pain cursing through my body as I approached the radiating princess of the sun, not wishing to further distress her as her harsh expression made it clear she had already many things on her mind. Luckily those same things bothering her also seemed to make her oblivious to my pain and she simply smiled warmly as she greeted me.
"Come then Sarshine, it is clear that if anypony deserves be at my side during this moment, it is you." Celestia's beautiful voice rang from her muzzle, but there was an element of authority to it. She had been angered, and I was very glad not to be pony who had done so.
I would not dare object to my queen's orders and had no reason to, this was a moment to be proud of. I stood as tall as I could, the golden armor perfectly set onto my body and shimmering in the light. I trotted along her side, determined to see justice served.
We made our way into the council chamber I had entered once before, this time much better prepared for the surprised and startled onlookers as the doors were flung aside by obedient guards and Celestia strode into the hall. The ponies within must have known she was coming, it had been a meeting called by her request. However, to see her stern and disappointed look passing over each of them was not something that had anticipated.
The head councilor I had the pleasure of meeting only so recently looked at me with disbelieve and fear for a moment before quickly averting his gaze onto Celestia, his expression stone cold.
"My Queen! You look much health--"
He stopped, silenced as Celestia without a word brought the hoof down on the stone slap she was occupying with enough force to send a crack down the center.
"Silence you traitor!"
Her voice rang now with only passion and anger, so loud and strong that even I had to flinch away. She spread her wings, the shadow they cast covering me completely, and continued.
"I have uncovered your conspiracy, and substantial evidence of all of your involvements! You have not only betrayed my dear sister Luna and I, but also your fellow kin."
Somehow as she spoke it felt as if the room itself grew hotter and then suddenly her horn began to glow, a small image of the sun forming in the center and slowly becoming larger and more pronounced.
"Under your schemes have not only died my and Luna's subjects, but also the morality of Equestria. I ask you now, why!?"
The sun grew even larger and for a moment I felt as if the furr on my skin would catch fire, and then suddenly the heat disappeared and I could feel Celestia's wing wrap around my side. Noises of discomfort and pain rang across the hall for only a few moments and then things dimmed down again, the bright sun slowly fading and the other ponies either crumbling to the floor outright or grasping to whatever support they could find. Their leader spoke out, his voice exhausted and hoarse.
"M...queen... we made a mistake! We never wished to... entice your wrath..." The other ponies looked utterly terrified as they struggled with what had happened mere moments ago, "B..but Equestria will never accept... two rulers... we, your subjects... YOU are our queen."
As he spoke I could feel a shiver run across Celestia's body, and through the wing covering me, for a moment it clenched and squeezed my side. I knew what she was thinking, what she had always been thinking, it was always her fault. The other pony looked over at the goddess of the sun, despair in his eyes.
"Luna is not fit to rule! She never was! You are the only goddess Equestria needs! Please do not punish us for trying to free us of a mare tha---"
Suddenly Celestia burst out a scream filled with agony and anger and sun reappeared so brightly and vividly infront of my eyes that they burned with pain and I was forced to look away. There were no screams of agony this time, no pony could survive the heat forced onto this fool and his ilk.
Even through goddess's protective wing I could feel the heat, and then it vanished as quickly as it had been summoned. There was complete silence as neither Celestia nor I knew what to say, till I felt her's wing withdraw from my side and I once more dared to open my eyes. The room around me was blackened from the intense heat it had endured.
I could hear a soft whimpering beside me, the sound so utterly weak and frail that I refused to accept that it had come from my queen, and yet when I looked toward the source of the sound there was only one pony beside me. Celestia stood there, her eyes closed and her body shivering with pain and emotions I could not dare to imagine. I stood there petrified, unsure what to say or do, to comment her for her actions or pity her for what she had to endure.
And then, Celestia turned he head toward me, her eyes opening to reveal tears she had tried to hide, tears an alicorn was assumed never to shed. She spoke, her voice shaken but stern.
"I am the traitor! It was my side that refused to let go of the past grievances, that refused to accept Luna! I never deserved to rule Equestria, I do not have the strength of my sister!"
The white mare let her head drop down and she turned toward the exit of the chamber.
"This war is over, I will surrender myself to Luna and restore peace to Equestria, or whatever Luna wishes to call it now."
Without giving me time to formulate a responds she walked out of the room, the guards at the door were so paralyzed by the sight of their princess so defeated that they said nothing. Deep in my mind I was cursing myself for having no answers to give my queen. We had proven Luna's innocence and drawn out the true traitors, but Celestia would never forgive herself for letting this conflict escalate as it did.
I could only hope now that Luna was as wise and strong as Celestia believed, and that she would forgive our mistake. |
Excerpts from the Luna War | Sacrifice | Luna cast a glance over her exausted and bloodied subjects, the few of the ponies close to her who had surrived this ambush only to find themself looked into a tomb for the living. Deep inside the castle of the Gryphon King, deep within the gryphon kingdom. She could most likely escape, force her way through the hoard assambled outside and flee toward her home, but non of us would be able to keep up with her, and she could not protect us from the hail of bolts, knifes and claws that would assult us.
I wondered if we had made things worse with our valiant struggle, we had warned Luna but also given her a weakness. If we had all parished she might... no, they would have found a way.
My depressed and defeated thoughts were silenced when suddenly a cold shiver ran down my spine, my whole body inventorly shaking as my eyes tried to find the source of the unearthly coldness. Instead they found only a purple myst that crawled through the cracks of the door and creeped across the floor.
I was not the only being in the room to take notice, the other ponies quickly found their eyes drawn toward the strange smoke, and then a completetly terrfyed screetch from one of the Gryphons in the room caused me to flinch. I could not make out what he said as he was speaking his native tounge but the horror in his voice did not need translation, this myst was not a good sign.
Even Luna seemed to have been affected by this strange presence, she said nothing as we all followed its movements, it slowly creeping toward one of my comrades.
And then it touched him, first it engulved one of his hoofs, then it seemed to sink into it, dissapearing within his skin. He looked up at us in confusion and visiable terror in his eyes, as if asking us what had just happened, and then he screamed in agony. He threw himself on the floor, rolling back and forth and stricking at anything he could reach with his hoofs.
We tried to rush toward him, find some way of helping, but Luna suddenly overtook us and unfolded her wings, shielding us from the view and stoping us from coming any closer. When she spoke her voice was calming and yet somehow I could her the worry she was feeling.
"This is not your charge, this is a power beyond normal ponies, I will stop its spread."
Luna moved closer to the unlucky pony, placing a hoof to its forhead and wispered something too quiet for any of us to hear, but just as suddenly as the loud screams had started did they stop.
The moon princess bowed her head to the affected pony and spoke, words that made no sense and yet seemed to hold weight I could not fathom.
"I will help you, and you will help me. Bring us home, help me save my subjects, and I give you a host worthy of your power. One that can contain you."
After she spoke there was a strange eery silence and then a flash of cold it drew the breath from me, for a moment I thought I would have the very life drawn from me, but instead the warms slowly returned.
Luna folded in her wings and raised her head, stepping back from the pony who had been affected by the myst, his eyes closed and his expression peaceful, he was dead.
She turned toward us, her expression now so very calm and confident that it gave strengh to me that I did not know I had. Her expression became stern as she looked at the Gryphon ambessadors within the room and spoke.
"Tell your precious emporer that his plan has failed, I have not only surrived and endured, but I know now what he has planned, and have the power to stop it."
With a smirk the moon princess turned toward the door and in a flash it exploded outward, shards of wood spraying forth into the hallway and drawing surprised and pained screetches from the Gryphons beyond. A wave of crossbow bolts were shot into our room but they all struck an invisble barrier and crumbled against it.
Luna stepped out into the hallway, the smoke and dust from the burst door covering her but completely and even as I tried to rush up beside her I could heare her yell with such vicous anger that it paralized me.
"You treacherous beasts have suceeded in but one thing, you have brought your very own nightmare to life! This war will not end till every Gryphon has paid his due for the crimes commited here today!"
Loud angry screetches werer the reply given to our queen's words, but then a magical wave threw me to the floor and the screetches fell silent, a bright light flashed before my eyes and the whole world seemed to shift, a loud cracking sound coming from below, and then things became quiet.
Much quieter then they would have any right to be, instead of sounds of battle there simply were soft sounds of... forest. The rustling of leaves penetrating the otherwise eerie silence.
I picked myself up from the stone floor and, my limbs acheing with exaustion and injuries, and looked around the room. It was still the same stone room, but somehow ever so slightly different. The floor was slightly slanted, as if build uneevenly, it had not been before. The almost perfect silence was interupted by the sound of something falling to the floor, but not stone, grass, leaves being crushed and twigs pushed aside.
The sound had come from behind and I turned around to investigate this curiousity. Before me was Luna, laying just outside the room, where she had been mere moments ago, and yet not. Instead of a stone hallway filled with Gryphons and wood splinters there was a lush forest. The green and browns of the plants and trees being in stark contrast to the grey stone structures I had seen the last couple days.
We were very clearly no longer in the castle of the Gryphon Emporer. Luna must have telported us, somewhere, us and the whole room. I had never heard of a unicorn with such power, teleportation was considered experimental magic at best, suicide at worst, but maybe alicorns knew things they never told us.
I trotted over to my exausted looking ruler and bowed to her, pressing my muzzle into the dirt before her and spoke in a quiet but determined voice.
"Thankyou for saving us my queen, you have my loyalty and love. I will serve you into death."
Luna's eyes shot wide open and stare right into mine, startling me and causing me to stumble backwards, both from emberrasment and becuase her eyes looked so not like hers. But then she smiled and after I recovered myself her eyes looked normal once more.
"Thankyou, Captain Nightlight" As she spoke she rose from the grass, seemingly having overcome whatever exaustion had drained her only moments ago. "You have proven passion and strengh, and with so many of our most loyal subjects killed I will need to call onto new ponies to replace them. You will be the first commander of my royal guard, the night guard." |
Excerpts from the Luna War | Truth | I gave a nervous glance to my two friends, who had recruited me to help them in their quest to uncover a conspiracy with far reaching consequences. This was it, finally we had laid bare our enemy and taken away their most powerful weapon, disguise. However, something made me shiver with unease.
The truth was, I didn't trust my allies one bit more then those traitors we were fighting, and I felt my usefulness had run its course, but I had no choice. I had to ensure that Luna would be freed from the crimes she did not commit, and that Equestria return to harmony. The large Earthpony pushed open the doors leading into the councilors chamber, it surprised me that it was unlocked. I shuffled after the two other ponies and spoke softly.
"Some hard evidence and then we are out of here, right?... I still don't see why you need me for this."
The Pegasus looked at me and shot one his confident and yet unpleasant grins and then turned his attention back to the room we had just entered, it was as lavish with furniture and decorative fabric as one would expect from a pony of this importance. And yet, it was instantly apparent that all of it was themed toward one topic, depicting the sun, the day, even Celestia raising the sun at the summer sun Celebration. Luna, the moon, the night, it was depicted not at all in this room, as if those things were not relevant.
I would have been surprised, insulted even, to see such obvious bias from a pony held so highly in a hierarchy that was supposed to value both sides as equal, but at this point it was the least of his crimes.
Still, the brightness and colors of the room caught my interest long enough that it took me a few moments to notice the ponies sitting front and center. I had been told that it was expected nopony would be here, instead we were face to face with a group that included some of the most influential ponies in all of Equestria. All high ranking royal advisers were present, or at least the official ones.
I shot an accusing glance at my two friends who had assured me this would be easy and quick. Now it might not even matter what evidence we posses, it would be difficult to explain breaking into private property of Celestia's most trusted ponies to steal information.
Before I could question what our plan was to get out of this Wingstroke spoke up.
"I am glad to see that you received our message and are willing to cooperate with us. It would indeed have been terrible if we had been forced to throw away our opportunities so blindly."
To my startled shock the Pegasus stepped toward the ponies completely casually, respectful bowing his head to their leader.
"We know all about your little agreement with the Gryphons. And we have all the evidence needed to bring Celestia's wrath down on you, with a pony outside your reach mind you."
A soft murmuring came from the ponies across the room, but their leader looked unfazed and simply shot as a warm and welcoming smile.
"But you see the wisdom in our actions and wish to help instead?"
I was about to reply with just denouncement of such accusation, but my blue friend was faster.
"We see the wisdom in your money and power, no more and no less. Celestia will win, and non of us need to pay the price for this little incident."
I was shocked by his words, I had known his 'for the money' approach and not valued him as valiant, but to betray us so bluntly. And then I noticed that his Earthpony friend had joined his side and nodded in agreement, leaving only me standing out as the odd pony who had not yet agreed.
To further add to my confusion the elder unicorn looked unhappier then before, as if he had been displeased by the responds given. He glanced over at his fellow traitors and sighed.
"Considering the circumstances we are not in a position to turn down your offer. I can however not help but mention how we would much rather have wished for ponies loyal to Celestia, rather then amoral mercenaries." He pronounced the last statement with complete disgust, as if he truly considered himself to be righteous, and then turned his look toward me.
"What about your third wheel there? He does not seem all to be all clued in on this little deal of yours. Is he going to cause further problems?"
And so I had suddenly become the center of attention, and the almost vicious looking grin on the muzzles of the advisers made it clear it was not a good form of attention.
The blue Pegasus who I had grudgingly thought a friend shook his head slowly and sighed.
"I like you Star, you are predictable and trustworthy, so hard to find in this sort of business, but they are right, me and (name) here make a good two pony show. And even if we let you walk away, I know you too well to fool myself into thinking you would just let us get away with this."
As he spoke I could feel my blood begin to rise, I could not figure out if he was being genuine or making fun of me for trusting him. But he saved me only to let the same fate befall me anyway.
As silence began to fall and all those death-wishing eyes settled on me I could not stop myself, I would not be an easy target. I snarled at my 'friend'.
"You forgot that I am a trained royal guard, you are all hereby under royal arrest and to be brought to Celestia for questioning!"
My horn began to glow brightly as I readied a shield against the assault that would follow my words, but to my surprise the ponies around me only continued to grin menacingly, till the traitor's leader once more talked.
"That is all nice and well, but I prefer to let others do the dirty work for me. So mercenaries, how about you two take care of your little friend and show us how dedicated you are to the cause, and then we'll have a deal?"
My heart skipped a beat when suddenly a knocking sound echoed from the door, when the other ponies looked no less surprised then me it became clear that this was not part of the scheme. The knocking happened once more and no pony dared move a muscle, part of me wishing to race to the door and beg for help, but the huge looming Earthpony made it clear I would not make it a hoofs length.
Finally the knocking stopped and instead came a voice, a young guard pony voice I had heard before somewhere.
"My apology Sir, but the princess has called for an emergency meeting and requested attendance by all her top advisers."
There was a long moment of silence following this and the glares direct at me had now turned into impressed accusations, but my own utter confusion must have made it clear that this was not my doing. After the pony once more knocked on the door, seemingly determined to succeed at his task, the advisers glanced at each other before their leader spoke up again, his look now once more directed at the blue Pegasus.
"If we all disappeared now, the same time your little friend was to have his accident, it would seem very strange. I don't know what you are playing at but we will go along, you remove him and we will be in contact soon, mercenary."
With this he trotted toward the entrance, casually walking past me as if he had no ill intentions at all. He opened the door and nodded at the Pegasus guard who had so eagerly delivered the summon.
"Ah, Thankyou for doing your job so diligently. You can inform the princess that I will be at the chamber in a few moments."
The guard nodded quickly and hurried off, having no reason to question the councilors words or investigate what had been occurring within his room. I saw the other ponies who were involved in the plot follow suit, many of them giving me a final knowing nod as they passed. One even spoke, his voice thick with venom and disgust.
"Don't feel cheated, you should have been executed for being present at a council meeting... no place for Luna loving scum like you."
When the final council member had left the room and the door slammed shut behind me I once more focused my magical energy and glaring at the two ponies I had trusted to protect me, the Pegasus idly scraping the floor with a hoof.
"That was a darn clever move of yours, but no one is going to come looking for us. We have all the time in the world to take care of you."
He and his big stallion friend started to walk toward me, then split into two and slowly began to circle me from opposite directions.
"Royal guard training? Nice speech, but don't forget that we saved your life once. I am confident we can take it back."
The moment he finished both of them leaped toward me, and my horn flashed bright as the magical barrier enveloped my body. Sadly they had been smart, and by splitting up I had to focus on two different directions at the same time, their progress toward me slowed but not stopped as they struggled against the magical force pushing them back.
With a loud growl I snapped my eyes open and let the magic disappear, instead leaping to the right and tackling the Pegasus who had sold me out so willingly. I succeeded at surprising him, knocking him over with my body and both of us tumbling against a heavy wooden table. The impact however knocked the wind out of me and even as I brought my hoofs down on the other ponies face I could feel strong hoofs grab my back, and fling me clean across the room.
With a yell of pain I struck a painting and the wall behind it, my back sending waves of pain throughout as I lay on the floor, panting heavily. My unfocused eyes could make out the two colored blobs, the blue one being helped up by the big red and then both of them growing bigger as they came closer.
I closed my eyes, trying to push out the foggy image I had seen and once more focusing my magic to build a protective barrier, but even as it materialized I could feel the immense strength of the Earthpony simply pushing through it. I tried harder to push him away, my whole body trembling, and then his hoof touched my head, grabbed the horn, and smashed my straight into the stone tiles.
Any concentration I had was shattered as my head burned with pain and my eyes instinctively opened to see the attacker, a big Earthpony looked down at me, his expression neither joyful nor sad, simply business.
And then a yell of surprise and confusion rang through the room, followed by the sound of a rough impact and shattering wood. The Earthpony let go of me and turned to look at the source of the noise, my eyes following his but the whole world was just a blur of colors. I saw a blue blob crumbled on top the table I had fought by only moments before, or at least what was now left of said table.
My eyes noticed a pony shaped dark gray blob by the entrance of the room, but before I could think on that I heard another yell, this one so deep and loud that it could only have originated from the Earthpony who had just almost smashed in my skull.
The blue shape struck with such velocity that I had no doubt even he had at broken some bones from that. I did not really understand what had happened yet, but with the ponies trying to kill me gone I felt much safer and I once more strained my eyes to make out the shape of my savior.
This became much easier when he quickly made his way over to me, placing a hoof to my head and caused a wave of calming healing magic to sink deep into my skull. My pain did not go away, but it became a small echo in the back of my mind, rather then the roaring it had been only moments ago, and my eyes once more regained their focus.
Before me was Starswirl, the grey unicorn looking at me with a strange sense of sadness and guilt.
"I am sorry you had to endure this, I wish I had been but a little bit faster. I had to make sure where their loyalties lay before I accused them of treason, even after we gathered all the evidence I needed."
He reached out a hoof to mine and with his help I slowly rose to stand, my legs a little unsteady but overall nothing seemed too be broken or other wise critical.
The old unicorn smiled at me cautiously and then looked over at the two other ponies, who had most certainly come the worse out of this.
"You have gone through a lot during this whole mess... but hopefully it is about to be over. Celestia knows everything, and she will deal with the traitors as she sees fit. I am going to secure these two." He nodded over at the unconscious pair and then looked into my eyes again. "If you want to witness the end to this you better hurry, Celestia is waiting on you." |
Excerpts from the Luna War | Neverfree | No matter how much I fought to hide it, I could not deny that this place made me feel uneasy and I wished to be leave as soon as possible. Why Luna and Celestia would pick here for their meeting was a mystery to me.
I quickly glanced over to Luna, hoping to draw strength and confidence from her but finding only another wave of unease rippling down my spine. She had been fighting day and night against whatever had transformed her appearance as of recent. Some days she seemed unaffected, but other days there was this inconsistency with her, her mood and feelings changing suddenly.
Today she had not won whatever fight she was fighting, her whole body had morphed into the dark nightmare I had first seen in Hoofington. Her expression was one of glee and satisfaction, but the sharp teeth and malicious eyes made it an uncomfortable sight.
As we made our way through the thickest of the forest I wondered if this had been a good idea. Celestia had agreed to peace, but seeing her fellow Queen like this might give her the wrong impression. However, I knew that asking Luna to delay this meeting would only worsen the circumstances, I promised to trust in her till the end.
As my magic pushed aside the leaves before me my mind came to a quick halt, suddenly looking with confused awe at a small castle. Its appearance in the middle of this ponyforsaken forest was startling and confusing, all of the ponies in our gazed at it with stunned surprise. Deep inside we knew that nopony had laid eyes on this castle in generations, and yet it stood here as if shielded from time itself.
"It is the castle of the Royal Pony Sisters, build long before the days of Equestria, and the empires that formed it." The unmistakable voice of Luna lectured us, and I quickly took note that she finally sounded like herself again. Our Queen walked past our still awe stricken bodies and casually approached what had to be the entrance to the castle, two heavy wooden doors that seemed unaffected by the many years of rain they had endured.
Even as I regained composure and rushed forward to take back my place beside my Queen she used her magic to open the doors. I could see inside revealing the rich colors of tapestry and memorials, if the wealth within these walls were ever known to the wide public the stream of adventurers and robbers would be near endless. The other ponies now too overcame themselves and took their places behind our charge, all of us proudly and eagerly entering the castle with her.
Once inside I was able to inspect the beautiful decorations that adorned the hallway, many of them depicting Luna and Celestia, younger and yet way too much the same if this castle was anywhere as old as Luna had implied. I could not help but wonder the true age of our Queens if this was how slowly they aged, they must outdate the most ancient written records of pony history.
Looking toward my Queen with a new sense of respect and awe I saw that not only her voice had undergone change, her body too had shifted more to her old self, this place must be giving her the strength and confidence she had lacked. I smiled to myself as I knew things would be alright.
Luna seemed to know well where she was going, as she rounded corners and passed doors without so much as a moment spend trying to recall her path, till finally we stepped into a large hall. In the center of the hall stood a strange rock carved imitation of a tree, with six large round stones at the ends of each arm. However, it drew my gaze and occupied my thoughts for only a short moment before I noticed the large white Alicorn standing below this tree. She looked at us with a strange mixture of guilt and joy. Celestia bowed to Luna so formally that for a moment I thought it was in jest, nopony had ever seen one of the Queens pay formal respect to the other as if they were of higher worth. And then she spoke, her warm and welcoming voice full of relieve.
"My little sister, oh how I have missed your brilliant presence!" She rushed toward us, ready to embrace the pony who officially was still her enemy, we acted quickly to step forward, past our Queen and respectfully placed ourselves between the two Alicorns. I bowed to her just as she had bowed to Luna and smiled nervously, wishing for Luna to discharge us from this awkward position. Her voice rang out, but it drained the smile from my face.
"As you see I have not been idle during my absence, we crushed Gryphon and Pony since my rule started, and now you are here to finally give in to my demands?"
I did my best to stain my eyes upwards, bowing still but also trying to see Celestia's reactions to the aggressive tone. For the first time in my life I wanted to object to Luna, to tell her not to ruin this chance we have at peace, but I needed to trust her now more then ever. And then suddenly Luna stepped forward, past us and closer to the princess of the sun.
"Look into my eyes dear sister, do you see what you have created in your foolish quest to rid yourself of me? Or will you continue to blind yourself?"
As she called Celestia sister, much as the sun princess had mere moments before, it struck me that when Luna had referred to this as the Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters she implied herself and Celestia to be exactly that.
The joy of finding out something so valuable and long questioned was quickly overshadowed by terror as I watched things unfold, Luna's body visibly transforming into her nightmare self. Even Celestia seemed stunned and aghast by the display, her body motionless as she stared deep into her sister's eyes, and then finally spoke.
"Dear sister, have my apologizes for what transpired! But it was never by my desire to be rid of you! I was indeed blind, blind to the skeem of my advisers, blind to the bias held by the ponies I trusted, but I see now and I come to set things right! Why this deformation of your bea.."
She was silenced by Luna, the moon princess baring her fang like teeth and smashing her hoofs onto the stone floor. And then she screamed, with anger and pain I had never seen her express.
"Do not lie to me! You left me for dead! The crimes I and my ponies have committed ... the blood on our hoofs, it is all your fault!" Luna looked back at us, and for a moment I could see her mouth move but no words come from it, as if she tried to say something but could not, and then she shook her head and smiled, that crazed smile she bore earlier.
"Look at them Celestia, these are my ponies now! They follow my will, they trust my judgment, you are obsolete. You tried to rid yourself of me, and now I am the one who no longer needs you!"
Her words were without question crazy and not those any of us had wanted to hear, but the impact they had on Celestia overshadowed everything. The almighty Queen was shaking uncontrolled, her expression a frozen terror as she stumbled backwards till she struck the rock structure behind her. The whole display was alien to me, my loving moon princess engulfed by a strange insanity, and the mighty sun princess fearful as a filly from the dark.
"I see you finally have opened your eyes my dear... do you see me? Your nightmare is real!"
Luna's final word was punctuated with a flash of her horn, and Celestia was thrown off her hoofs and launched into the air, striking the top of the dome with such velocity that the stone shattered and hailed down on us. I was about to leap away when the rocks stopped in midair, Luna having leaped up and used her magic to protect us, she looked at us and said but one word.
"Thankyou."
Before any of us could reply she had flown after her sister, leaving us confused and rightfully terrified as the two ponies we swore to protect engaged in outright combat. All we could do was stare up at the grey sky, a dark and a white shape struggling against each other, the white one often being flung around and striking parts of the castle, causing the damage that the castle had been able to avoid for so long.
As we watched we could see Luna grow to dominate, her attacks much more viscous and her magic seemingly more potent. I stood there and hoped with all my heart that she would stop, that my loving Queen return to her normal self and end this pointless struggle, but instead she only grew more eager as the fighting went on.
Finally it ended where it had begun, Celestia violently crashing into the rock tree once more, this time with enough force to shatter it, the 'branches' breaking and the round stones falling to the floor around her. I could see the sun princess how I had never before, in pain and utterly exhausted. She looked at us, the ponies who had once sworn loyalty to her and her sister, and let her head drop to the floor.
Luna dropped down before her, landing comfortably on all four of her black hoofs and towering over her beaten enemy, and laughed with such insanity that I refused to believe it came from her. And then she just stood there, seemingly waiting for Celestia to say or do something. Celestia answered, the dirt covered Alicorn growled with tired determination and rose to her hoofs, her horn glowed as she focused her magical energy. Luna looked unfazed by this, she even turned to grin at us, and then at her sister, speaking with that dark joy that had taken over her.
"Oh this is it! You are finally going to fight back? We both know what you could do, but would you dare?!"
To my surprise Celestia simply looked back at Luna and shook her head, and spoke with what must have been the last of her strength.
"This is not her fault! I will not see her harmed by my mistakes, she just needs time..."
With her last words her horn flashed in a bright light, blinding me momentary. When my sight returned I could make out the blackness of Luna's body, but there no longer was Celestia, and the stones that had fallen around her had disappeared too, leaving the tree broken and robbed of its strange beauty.
Luna laughed once more, her hysteria sending cold chills through my whole spine, and suddenly I wondered if this is what she had warned me off, if this is what she would always be now.
I shook my head and stomped my hoof on the floor. We had gone this far, done so much in her name. I simply could not turn my back on her, could not betray her. Luna was our Queen, more powerful and righteous then Celesta. I trust her judgement, she would defeat the darkness.
We had to win this war, no matter the sacrifice. |
New Fairy Tail | pre | It was a sunny spring day and there was a six year old Pegasus filly exploring the castle. She wandered around for a while before she found herself in a garden.
She gasped in awe at the beautiful flowers that had begun to bloom, and all the animals in the garden.
"Oh pretty!" She said as a pink and blur butterfly flew in front of her. She playfully chased it through the garden laughing happily as she followed it.
After chasing it for a while she stopped to catch her breath and while she did the butterfly landed on her nose.
"Hello little butterfly." Fluttershy whispered softly to it as she admired it's delicate pink wings. It stayed on her muzzle for a moment before it flew away.
She wandered through the garden for a while occasionally stopping to look at an animal, or listen to the chirping birds sing. And once or twice she sang with them.
Soon it began to get hot outside so Fluttershy sat in the shade if a tree. She laid in the grass and stared up at the bright blue endless sky.
She sighed as she felt the spring breeze caress her face and blow her mane around slowly. She felt happy in these gardens, like she belonged there.
"Oh how I wish I could stay here forever." Fluttershy said to herself.
"Me too." A voice next to her said causing Fluttershy to squeak and dart up in to the tree she had been laying under.
"Oh I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you." A filly's voice could be heard. Fluttershy looked down from her branch and saw a dark pink Pegasus who seemed to be about the same age as her. The filly had a long turquoise mane and tail with light teal colored streaks. Her bands were swept to the side and there was a little white bow by her ear. Her eyes were a light blue and she had a sweet smile on her face. "Can you please come down?"
Fluttershy nodded and slowly descended from her branch.
"I didn't mean to scare you." The filly said
"Its okay." Fluttershy said quietly as she hid behind her mane.
"I'm glad 'cuz I was wondering if you would like to play, or at least talk?" The pink Pegasus said.
"Okay" Fluttershy squeaked.
"Great! I'm Creative Cloud. Whats your name?" Creative asked the shy Pegasus.
"I'm..." The rest was inaudible
"What was that?" CC asked
"I'm..." She said it even quieter.
"Didn't quite catch that." CC stated.
Fluttershy whimpered and tried to make herself smaller and disappear, but it didn't work.
"Could you please speak up?" CC asked
"Fluttershy." She aid barely loud enough for creative to hear.
"Oh, okay." CC said satisfied. She then sat next to Fluttershy and then there was an uncomfortable silence.
"So..." CC said in attempt to start a conversation "Do you come to the gardens very often?"
"I've never been here before today." Fluttershy saod quietly "but I plan on coming often."
"I've been coming here since I came to the castle." Creative told her freind.
"How long have you lived at the castle?l Fluttershy asked.
"About a day." Marina answered nonchalantly
Fluttershy looked at her freind in confusion, which Creative noticed imidately.
"If I've only lived here for a day and I came here to the garden today, then I'be come here every day since I came here." CC explained
"Oh, that makes sense." Fluttershy said with a smile.
"So, how long have you lived here?" CC asked.
"I have lived here my entire life." Fluttershy said "Born in the castle raised in the castle for the past 6 years."
"Cool!" Creative smiled. "I was wondering, would you like to be P. ?"
Fluttershy nodded "Sure"
CC gave her new freind a short hug "I have a feeling this is the start of an amazing frindship." CC said
"Me too." Fluttershy agreed.
So the two talked in the garden and played together as freinds. Tjey plaued for hours doing things like tag, l I-spy and hide and seek. They plaued enjoying their freedom as fillies.
After what seemed like hours the fillies' fun was ended.
"Fluttershy! I have been looking everywhere for you." A light yellow earth pony with a pink and blue mane.
"Sorry mommy." Fluttershy apologised to her 'mother' "I was having alot of fun with my new friend" Fluttershy explained
"It's good to see that after six yeard you've finaly made a freind." Bon Bon said happily. "Mabey she would like to join us and the other servants for dinner."
"I would love to!" CC said hapily as the two flew out of the gardens and into the castle.
"Soon those two are going to be inseparable." Bon Bon said to herself whith a small chuckle.
And she was completely corect as time went on the two became great freinds and would hardly ever leave eachother. Like two peas in a pod they did everything together.
Somewhere deep in the ever free forest there was an old castle. It was mostly in ruimd but there were some places where it was less destroyed but it was still barely standing.
A dark blue alicorn, with a mane that resembled the night sky, walked through one of the halls. She had once been the princess of the night, bit while she jad been off on royal dutied the turant Discord had attacked her elder sister and claimed the the throne for himself. She would have tried to help her sister, but she wasnt strong enough.
She had to wait. A time would come where the way to stop Discord would be shown, but only when the time was right.
Luna didnt know how long it would take or what it would be but what she did know was, she had to help her nieces remember. It would be hard but her ability to enter dreams would help.
She also knew that if Discord found her, she wouldnt be able to help the ponies.
"We are truly sorry dear sister but we must hide till the time is right." Luna said as she thought of her older sister. As long as Celestia and Sombra were together they would be able to survive.
Luna went into one of the less destroued rooms. It had a bet in it and some other things that werent important. She lay on the bed as she watched tje sun set. Now was the time she could help.
> Chaos and Crystals
Today wasn't as sunny as it had been for the past week so Fluttershy and Creative had to think of something to do, preferably indoors.
"What do you want to do today?" Fluttershy asked as both fillies looked outside.
"Oh why don't we go play in the chocolate milk rain" CC said excitedly.
Yah that's right Chocolate milk rain! You cant expect the master of chaos to rule Equestria with out causing even the slightest bit of chaos. Every once in a while there would be normal rain because the ponies needed water for plants and animals and bla bla bla. Discord may be evil but he isn't heartless. Plus giving them what they want every once and a while made it less likely for them to try and overthrow him.
"Wont we get sticky?" Fluttershy asked.
"Yah, but its a small price to pay to have fun. Plus we can always take baths afterwards." CC answered optimistically.
"I guess you're right" Fluttershy smiled. "Come on lets go!"
Both girls ran through the hall to the gardens and began to play in the yummy chocolate rain. One time while they played CC brought down a cotton candy cloud
Fluttershy couldn't do it 'cuz she was a very weak flier. CC was a few months older than her, more experienced, stronger, and from Cloudsdale requiring her to be able to fly.
They played as long as they could before going inside and getting cleaned up.
After getting all the chocolate rain and cotton candy out of their manes and coats they braided others manes and tails.
"Oh, that was so much fun!" Fluttershy smiled as she braided CC's mane while CC braided Fluttershy's.
"Totally!" CC agreed. "We should do that more often"
"Yah we should" Fluttershy agreed quietly.
When they were done braiding each others manes and tail that sat and talked together for a little while until it was time for them to have dinner.
In the Crystal Empire the purple alicorn who had come there five years ago sat on a balcony over-looking the Empire.
Twilight had tried as hard as she could to ember anything from her past. She had been completely unsuccessful.
After the first three years she gave up. She would never remember so she might as well get used to her new life. Over the years Cadence and Shining Armor had be come like he older brother and sister.
They took care of her, even if she wasn't a filly, they helped her in any way they could, and they were just do loving towards her.
They weren't the only ones though. Not long after she appeared she began to fall in lobe with the guard Flash Sentry. After a while she had eventually confessed to him and discovered h felt the se way. They then began going on dates and he eventually proposed. They had gotten married about a year ago and are always by each others sides, well almost always.
He had a lot of work to do as a guard and she had royal duties as a princess. Cadence and Shining Armor had let her do some things so that they weren't as busy as before. Twilight had offered to take up some of the responsibilities
As she had told Cadence and Shining Armor many times 'might as well do something while I am here'
Right now she had a break and Flash was working so she was left to think to herself.
Every now in then she would wonder if she had a family before. She probably did but did they lover and care for her? Did she love them? Had she erased her memory, or had somepony else done it? She knew none of the answers, she knew nothing.
Twilight had searched every book in the whole crystal empire but she had found nothing that could help her remember. No spell to bring her memory back.
What if there were other ponies who had loved her and missed her dearly for the past five years but didn't know where she was, or how to find her.
So many thoughts ran through her head. The possibilities were endless. Who knows what happened to her.
A single tear ran down her cheek as she continued to think about who she really was.
Somepony put a hoof on her shoulder bringing her out of her thoughts. She looked at the orange Pegasus behind her.
"You okay Twily?" He asked with a look of concern
"Yah I'm fine." Twilight half whispered
"You sure about that?" He pressed on
"Yah, I was just thinking." She said as she stood up and began to go back into the castle
"Were you thinking about..." He didn't need to continue. She knew what he was going to say
"Yah, I was." Twilight answered
"I know you want to know, but maybe you should let it go. Stop worrying about the past and live in the present." Flash said as he put an arm over her shoulder.
"I know I should" Twilight sighed as she leaned into him "But I cant help but think about it."
"I know, and I promise that I will do whatever I can to help you remember" Flash comforted her.
"Thanks." Twilight said as she kissed his cheek. Flash turned to her and kissed her full on the lips.
"Come on, we should get some dinner." Flash said after they finished their kiss.
"Its already dinner time?" Twilight asked in surprise. Flash nodded, the past few days had been going by so fast for Twilight.
The two of them made their way to the dining room and got their dinner.
That night as they were sleeping, in the room Cadence and Shining armor had given them a year ago, a dark alicorn flew just outside the window.
"I hope this works." She whispered to herself as her horn began to glow.
Twilight was in a colorful garden that was somewhat familiar. She saw a younger version of herself running and chasing a filly that somehow seemed familiar. She was a pink earth pony with a fluffy pink mane
"Who in the wide world of Equestria is that?" Twilight asked herself
"Cant catch me!" The filly taunted as she ran into a bush. The younger Twilight dove in after her but the filly wasn't there.
The older Twilight slowly followed "This is strange" She a said to herself
"Where'd you go?" Younger Twilight muttered as she looked around.
"She isn't here" A voice over head said. Both Twilights looked up and saw another pony. This one also seemed familiar. She was a cyan Pegasus with a rainbow mane.
"She isn't here? Oh well I guess I'll just have to..." The younger Twilight began but stopped as the flew up as fast as she could. The rainbow maned Pegasus zoomed away in an instant and ducked out of sight. The younger twilight groaned slightly before she looked down.
She saw orange earth pony with a straw colored mane. To the real Twilight she also seemed familiar.
"Who are these ponies? Did I know them?" She asked herself again as she continued to watch
"I've got you now" The younger Twilight said as she chased the other earth pony who was really fast.
That pony also ducked out of sight. The younger twilight almost followed her but before she did she saw a bush near her move slightly. She teleported behind it and caught a white unicorn filly with a curly purple mane.
"Got cha'" She exclaimed causing the little filly to squeal "Your it!" Young Twilight said before teleporting away.
Instantly the scene changed and Twilight saw the same four ponies and a slightly older younger version of herself, huddled together in the rain, a mysterious figure standing in front of them.
There was a flash of lightning and the pink one was gone another flash and the white unicorn was gone. Another flash an the Pegasus and earth pony were gone leaving twilight alone a final flash and the younger version of herself was gone.
Twilight then woke up with a start.
"What in the wide world of Equestria was that?" She asked herself
"What was what?" A tire flash asked her
"Nothing it was just a dream" Twilight awnsered.
"You sure?" He asked.
Twiligh nodded "Yah. We should go back to sleep"
"Okay" He said as he laid down. Flash had a feeling it wasn't just a dream but he didn't want to force her to tell him. So they should just get back to sleep. Twilight would tell him when she was ready.
Twilight then laid down and wrapped her hooves around Flash and soon both were asleep. |
New Fairy Tail | Awesomeness | It was still raining chocolate milk outside it had gone non stop since yesterday and Fluttershy and Creative had to do something.
"Do you want to go play in the chocolate rain again?" CC asked her best friend
Fluttershy shook her head "No, mommy got a little mad at me for playing in the chocolate rain."
"Oh, okay." CC understood completely, in the little time she had been here she had seen that Fluttershy's mom, Bon bon, was a bit over protective at times and she just wanted what's best for her daughter. "What should we do then?"
"We could draw or play hide-and-seek or... draw" Fluttershy said quietly unable to think of anything else to do.
"Good idea Fluttershy! We can play hide-and-seek around this castle!" CC said excitedly
"Okay" Fluttershy nodded "Who hides first?" She asked
CC pondered for a moment about that "You can hide first if you want to."
"Okay" Fluttershy said quietly "Count to 60"
CC nodded then closed her eyes and begun to count out loud "1... 2... 3... 4..."
Fluttershy quietly snuck away so CC wouldn't hear which direction she went in. Fluttershy snuck around the castle but stayed near where CC was so it wouldn't take forever to find her.
Fluttershy looked around and saw a plant big enough to hide her small body. She quickly went over to it and hid in its leaves. She got in to a position as comfortable as she could so she wouldn't have to move and give herself away.
And from her position there was a small space she could see through so she could tell it CC was close.
"58... 59... 60!" CC finally finished counting, she didn't really want to count to 60 because 1. She was six and it was hard to get there, luckily she was somewhat advanced for her age.
"Ready or not here I come!" CC called out as she began run down the hall that she had heard Futtershy sneak down. No matter how quiet Fluttershy was, or how loud she counted, she was able to pick up even the faintest sound.
CC began to search the hallway. She looked in every possible place a small little filly like Fluttershy could fit into. While searching she found some places that she would be able to hide in when her turn came. Bit she could worry about that later. Right now she had to focus on finding her freind.
As she walked down one of the vast halls she saw a potted plant big enough for a pony to hide in. She passed it pretending to not notice it and walked a little distance before ying back.
Fluttershy had seen her freind walk past her hiding place and she giggled a tiny bit after she was shure her freind was out of hearing.
She sat for a little, staying hidden. After a moment something jumped on her from above causing her to squeal and dart out from the leaves of the plant.
She heard laughter behinde her and she turned around to see her friend laughing a little bit.
"You're it!" CC said trying not to laugh anymore.
"CC don't scare me!" Fluttershy pouted "It's not funny."
"Sorry Flutters." CC said apologeticly "I just wanted to have a little fun"
"Its okay." Fluttershy replied "just please dont do it again"
"I promise I wont." CC said.
"Good" Fluttershy smiled
"Now, its you turn!" CC said as she began to fly away "You can count to 30 if you want" she called out.
Fluttershy nodded and began to count. And the game continued.
Elsewhere in Equestria in the city of Cloudsdale, four pegasi were flying around professionally doing an obstacle course.
Rainbow Dash was in the lead as always because of her awesomeness. Soarin was right behind her. And Spit Foot and Fleet Fire were close behind them.
They did a couple laps of rhe obstacle course before Rainbow crossed the finish line.
"I win!" Rainbow exclaimed "Oh yah I'm awesome!" Rainbow said doing a small victory dance.
Soarin landed next to her then Spit Fire and Fleet Foot followed.
"You sure are good at out shining the rest of us." Spit Fire commented.
"Thats true" Fleet Foot agreed
"I know" Rainbow said with a smirk "I am as awesome as I want to be"
The three nodded in agreement with the cyan pegasus.
"Thats why I like you so much" Soarin commented while putting his hoof around Rainbow's shoulder.
In the past 6 years alot had happened Rainbow had been such a great flyer that she had been abpe to join the Wonderbolts! They had all travled equestria together and performed whenever they could.
But her becoming a Wonderbolt wasnt the only thing that happened, her and Soarin had (believe it or not) fallen in love, this jad made Spit Fire a bit jealous. She had known and liked Soarin longer than rainbow had but they were happy together so she eventually have them her full support. There were plenty of other stallions out there and she might like them more who knows? Anyways, eventually Rainbow and Soarin tied the knot (yet another unexpected thing) and were very happy together.
"Lets fo some more laps" Fleet Foot said before flying off at her full speed.
"I'm in" Spit Fire called as she too took off full speed.
Rainbow and Soarin stood for a good 10 seconds before excjanging glances and taking off together full speed. They pased the other two pegasi and left them in the dust.
The four wonderbolts trained and flew for hours. After hours of training and flying they went back to their cloud home to hang out and just relax. |
New Fairy Tail | Apples and Scales | Discord floated down the halls of the castle he had resided in for the past 6 years. Every once in a while he would change things up a bit like making the floor checker patterend of turning plants into carnivorous plants or switching the gravity or anything chaotic really.
"Chaos is such a wonderfull thing." Discord said as he admired some of his glorious chaos.
Just then a purple and green dragon came running p o the draconiquues "You highness!" he called out
"What spike?" Discord asked boardly while mostly paying attention to his chaos.
You know, spike had been a baby dragon when Discord had taken over all those tears ago. het was probably a pet to the oldest princess he had gotten rid of all those years ago. Discord decided not to get rid of him because, well it never hurts to have a few more servants aron the castle.
"I finished assigning all the work for the servants for the rest of the month." Spike told the chaotic king. Discord ad put spike in charge of assigning jobs to the servants. he normally did it surprisingly quickly considering how many servants there were.
"Well I obviously need to give you a tougher job" Discord grumbled under his breath.
Spike had heard that and pretended not to "Anyway, since I am done for the month I am going to take my week off."
Spike did that a lot, he was allowed to leave and do stuff after his job was finished. most of the time he would travel to places around Equestria.
"Whatever, just remember to come back at the beginning of the month." Discord said as he went back to his chaos.
"Great, see ya." Spike said as he ran out of the room.
Spike made his way out of the castle and through the streets of Canterlot all the way to the train station. When he got there he looked at the schedule to see when the next train would arrive and where it would be heading to.
The next train would arrive in about 5 to 10 minutes and it was heading to Ponyville.
"Well, I've never been there before." Spike happily said to himself. He pulled out some bits he had and took them to a ticket booth and gave them to the pony running it.
"One ticket to Ponyville please." He said. The pony took the bits and gave the young dragon the ticket.
"Thanks" he said as he walked to a bench to sit at till the train arrived.
In the little town of Ponyville at Sweet Apple Acers Apple Jack, Apple Bloom and Big Mac were working hard on the farm harvesting the apples in one section of the orchard.
In the past few years Apple Bloom, Big Mac and Granny Smith had become like family to the young earth pony. AJ had always helped with the harvests and chores.
Over the past few years she had helped Big Mac with the special Zap Apple harvests. One year Apple Jack had Received a had from Apple Bloom and AJ never took it off. every pony agreed that she looked better with it on.
The three ponies worked hard on their harvest and every now and then she stoped to wipe the sweat off her fore head.
"Man it is hot outside" AJ remarked
"Eyup" Big Mac said. In the time she had known him she had learned he never said much
After working a good portion of the day AJ, AB and Big Mac grabbed some of the barrels of apples to take into Ponyville to sell.
They walked al while under the blazing hot sun all the way to the market, where they set up a stand to sell some apples. They had a couple customers now and then but not many.
Spike was sitting on the train to Ponyville starting out the window. He could see part of the small town from the window. He could tell that the ride wouldn't be much longer from there probably only a few minutes or so.
Spike wondered what the small town would be like, If the ponies were nice, and stuff like that.
After a few minutes of starting out the window the train pulled into the station and every pony, and dragon, got off.
Spike got off and began to look around the small town. it looked like a nice place, there was a couple cotton candy clouds and upside don trees but those were everywhere in equestria and some places had loads more chaos than this place did..
Spike wandered a bit trying to find a hotel or inn or some place like that. He also needed to find some lunch.
The little dragon's stomach began to growl. He really needed something to eat. He looked around and caught sight of an apple cart! Most apples in Equestria had been changed by magic and tasted like all kinds of sweets. It was very rare to find normal apples.
When spike reached the cart he was greeted by a friendly voice with a slight country accent.
"Howdy there, what can ah do ya for?" A tan earth pony, with green eyes and a blonde mane tied into two pony tails and a stenson hat, asked the young dragon
"Oh, I just needed some apples" Spike told the mare. he looked at her and noticed they both had emerald green eyes. To him she was kind of... pretty.
"Sure how many apples would yall like?" She questioned bringing the dragon out of his thoughts.
"Oh, well 5 should be good for now." Spike said.
"Well then, that'll be 2 bits." The pony told him.
Spike pulled out a small pouch of bits and pulled two out placing them into the pony's hoof.
"Thanks sugar cube." The mare said as a young yellow filly with a red mane and pink bow tied in it, brought a sack of apples to the dragon. Man that filly was so adorable he could die!
"Thanks." Spike said as he began to leave.
"Wait," The mare said stopping him from leaving "I've never seen ya around here before, ah recon' yall are new"
"no, I'm just visiting this place." Spike replied
"Well then you are gonna need a place to stay aren't ya?" She asked
"Yah are there any hotels or inns or anything?" He asked
"No, not here" The filly with the red mane butted into the conversation.
"Why not?" Spike asked
"Well, there hasn't been need" The earth mare answered. "Not many ponies come here, but when they do they don't stay long."
"Oh, well, then I guess I wont have a place to stay" The Dragon said.
"Not nececarily" The mare replied "yah could always stay at our place in sweet apple acers" She said.
"Eyup." The red stallion with an orange mane nodded.
"Really?" Spike asked happily
"Why, of course you can" the little filly answered.
"Thanks!" he said excitedly. "I'm Spike by the way."
"Well spike, I am Apple Jack and my adoptive siblings are Apple bloom," She pointed to the filly "And Big Mac." She said pointing to the stallion.
"Well, its nice meeting all of you" He said
"Pleasure is all ours" AJ said. In truth she thought the little dragon was sort of adorable too bad he was only visiting not permanently staying
"After we are done selling most of these, we will show you sweet apple acers, and if you want to you can help us." AJ said.
Spike nodded and they began to work |
New Fairy Tail | Ponies | READ THIS PLEASE: Later in this chapter there will be some Riddles some are from a book of 'Mensa Mind challenges' and for those of you who dont know Mensa is a school for geniouss' but you dont have to be a genious to awnser them so try your best (If you want to) To awnser them
Luna sat in the library in the castle of the two sisters, half absorbed in a book. Normaly she didnt read that much but you know a good book now and again is fine.
As she read she heard the door to the library open and she turned to see her 'student' Sunset Shimmer soaking wet.
"Quite a storm out there isnt it?" Luna asked as she set the book down.
"Yah, luckily its not chocolate milk" Sunset smiled
"Yah, thats a bright side" Luna said. One reason they were in the everfree forest was because discords magic couldnt influince it, no magic could effect it. Luna had trained sunset in magic in a library abpve ponyvil but they moved to her childhood castle after Discord took over.
Why? Well if Discord had taken over he had overthrown her sister somehow and Luna was determined to help Celestia and her daughters be reunited and take back their kingdom. Thats one reason she was giving Twilight those dreams. To help her regain her memory, though it may take a while.
"So Luna?" Sunset spoke
"Yes Sunset?" Luna asked
"What are we going to learn today?" Sunset questioned her mentor
"Nothing." Luna replied
"What, why?" Sunset asked
"It's Saturday, I want to relax a bit" Luna awnsered
Sunset nodded and walked to a pillow on the floor and levitated a book to read.
While sunset read Luna thought about her sister, what exactly had happened? Hopefully she, and mabey sunset, could help fix what Discord had done and Celestia's family could be reunited.
Speaking of that family...
Luna glanced at her student, Sunset never knew her real family and Celestia's daughters had never known her, their oldest sister. Luna sill wondered why Celestia had put her in charge of teaching Sunset and helping her she first began teaching her Sunset had few magical cababilities. Bur through the years Sunset had become great and learned lots of spells by Star Swirl the Bearded. She would study long and hard and, though Luna encoraged her to make freinds Sunset never did.
It may have been better for her to grow up with her sisters but Sunset was verry helpfull in finding out where the other princesses were, even if she didn't know that they were her sisters or why Luna needed to find them.
None of the princesses were hurt and they all seemed somewhat happy with their new lives. Thay all have freinds and loved ones to help them. Mabey this whole incident was a good thing.
It could bee good but the sooner Discord is defeated the better. So she needed to do everything she could to help.
Pinkie and Cheese were walking out in the middle of nowhere waiting to know where a party was needed. They did this alot and some times they waited a long time for a party to be needed. At the moment they were telling jokes and riddles.
"Okay so what time is it when your clock strikes 13 times?" Pinkie asked
Cheese thought for a moment trying to come up with an awsnser "Uh, time to get a new clock?" He said unsurely
"Yes!" Pinkie giggled a littel and cheese joined.
"Okay my turn" Cheese said before thinking of something "What two numberes have the same awnser when multiplied as when added?"
"Cheese you know I'm not that great at math" Pinkie wined a little
"Its easy." Cheese said "I could tell you the awnser." He offered
"No, give me a second" Pinkie held up her hoof and stopped walking trying to think as hard as possible
"I could just..." Chesse looked at the pink mare
"No dont tell me I can figure this out" She said still thinking "Oh I know 0 and 0"
"No but close" Cheese said
Pinkie then began to go through every number she could think of before finding the awnser "Oh it's 2 and 2 isnt it?"
"Yes" Cheese smiled
Pinkie was releived that she had gotten the awnser right and could stop thinking
"My turn." Pinkie smiled "why do white sheep eat less grass than black sheep?"
"I dont know. Why?" Cheese asked
"Because there are fewer black sheep than white sheep" Pinkied awnsered "I get to go again"
After many unusual little brain teasers they continued down their path.
Cheese just continued to walk while staring at the crazy mare "After all these years I still dont understand you Pinkie" He whispered to himself before chuckling a little. |
New Fairy Tail | Life in Manehatten | Rarity sat at a desk designing some beautifull dresses. Though she was still pretty young and didnt really need a job she worked with Fancy Pants and his family and Coco did as well.
Rarity smiled at her dress designs and levitated them over behind a curtain. After gathering some supplies she went behind the curtains and began to work on her dresses.
After half an hour Rarity emerged from the curtain
"Coco, come here!" Rarity called exitedly
Coco looked up from a dress the was currently working on. "Why?" She asked
"I just want to show you something." Rarity smiled
"Okay" the earth pony said setting down the dress and walking over to her freind.
"So what is it that you want to show me?" The pony asked before she was pulled behing the curtain by Rarity
When Coco saw the dresses rarity hed made she gasped. "Oh Rarity these are the most beautifull dresses I have ever seen!"
"Thanks darling." Rarity smiled "Do you think Fancy Pants will like them?" She asked unsurely
"Like them? He'd be stupid to not like these amazing dresses." Coco awnsered
"Thanks." Rarity smiled gving Coco, who was like a sister to her, a hug. "Now all I have to do is put the finishing toutches on them then show them to him."
Coco smiled and walked back to where she had been working on her dress.
Not long after, Fancy Pants came in to check on them.
Fancy looked at Coco's dresses.
"Oh, exelent work Coco Pomel, I'm still surprised at how you can do all these so quickly yet perfectly despite having no magic." Fancy Pants complimented
"Thanks." Coco smiled "Altough I think you'll like Rarity's dresses better."
"Speaking of Rarity where is she?" Fancy asked the earth pony
"I'm right here" Rarity said from behind the other unicorn.
"I'm exited to see what you've been working on." He smiled at Rarity
"Trust me you'll love it" Coco told the stallion
"Well then, show me what you've made." Fancy said as he turned to the curtain that the unicorn was about to move.
"Prepare to be amazed" Coco said to the colt.
Rarity then moved the curtain over to reveal the dresses she had been working on.
"Oh my, Rarity! These are so beautifull!" Fancy pants exclaimed in awe "Where did you ger that fabric?"
"Oh this, its a new fabric I've been developing for months" the unicorn said pridefully "Its stretchy, but not clingy. Shimmery yet not showy! And it works for everything from shoes to skirts to tops!"
"You never cease to amaze me." Fancy aplauded her. "I would even wear one of these."
"Yes, I have made lots of extra fabric so we can make suits and ties as well." Rarity added "And I can make different colors if needed."
"Bravo miss Rarity!" Fancy Pants praised the talented mare "Now, Its lunch time, so how would you two like to acompany me for lunch?" He asked both mares
"Oh well that would be great but I have plans" Coco explained "But rarity can go with you."
Truth be told Coco didnt have plans for lunch she jus knew Rarity liked fancy pants, even if she was a little too young to start dating, and wanted to let them hang out alone.
"Well then, miss Rarity" he said holding out his hoof for her "shall we?"
Rarity nodded and took his hoof "Yes we shall."
And with that they left. |
New Fairy Tail | Only For You | Sunset sat out in the everfree castle of the two sisters. She was in the garden, by a pond, about to attempt a new spell.
Her horn ignited and glowed it's usual green color. Soon a bit of a blue-ish color mixed in as it spiraled around he horn. Sunset, almost done wwith the spell, concentrated harder as not to fail. Sparks began to shoot out of her horn falling into the pond.
Sunset shot a magical beam at the waters surface causimg it to glow green for a moment. Her horn stopped glowing as she opened her eyes and looked into the pong as the green faded away.
'Time to see if it worked...' The unicorn thought to herself.
"Show me Princess Twilight Sparkle." She requested. At first nothing happened causing Sunset to think she had messed up on the spell, but all of a sudden a bright flash of light occurred and the edges of the pond looked as if green lightning was surging around it.
After the glow dissipated an image of the purple alicorn appeared.
Twilight was walking through the crystal empire. Walking alongside her was Her husband Flash and a small little filly. She was about Five years old, she was an alicorn like twilight and had the same coat color as flash. Her mane was blue, like Flash's, bit she had pink and purple highlights in it and her eyes were the same color as the purple princess.
(Sunset assumed this filly to be Twilight and Flash's daughter)
"So Morning Glory," Twilight asked her daughter "What would you like to do first?"
(From what sunset could see this was the Crystal Empire's annual crystal fair. The ponies looked happy and were all crystallized in their usual way. It looked like a fun event to Sunset Shimmer)
The little alicorn shrugged "I dont know, ebewy thing wooks so fun!" (Trying to mimick how a 5-year-old talks. Not verry good at it)
"Well, how about a roller coaster?" Her father suggested.
"Oh, I downt know daddy. It looks scawy." She replied nervously
"Well if you don't want to you don't have to" Twilight smiled sweetly before booping her daughters nose causing the young alicorn to giggle a bit.
"How about we play some games?" The orange pegasus suggested instead
Morning Glory smiled and nodded excitedly. "Yes games pwease!"
And the three went to do the carnival games together as a family.
(After watching the princess and her family for a while sunset began to get tired since it was getting late. She would have gone to her bed had she not heard Twilight talking about a specail performance that would be happening for the first night of the fair. Sunset was interested so she continued to watch the princess)
Twilight walked on the stage along with Cadence and Shining Aurmour.
"Hello everypony!" Cadende spoke for all the ponies in attendence, including the ones who had come from orher places to whitness the powering of the crystal heart. "Have you all beeen having a good day?"
The ponies cheered loudly full of enthusiasm.
"Good" Shining Armor continued for her "There's more to come in the next few days"
"Including a special show tonight!" Twilight added "Along with fire works afterwards"
This resulted in another loud cheer.
"First, all the way from Canterlot," Cadence spake again
"Some specail guests!" Shining Added
"Here to perform for you, Mondancer, Lyra Heartstrings, Twikleshine, Lemon Hearts and Minuette!" Twilight announced before all three quicly moved off stage.
A moment later a curtain lifted revealing only one mare, a creme colored unicorn with a red mane similar to Twilight's. She wore her mane up in a fancy style and had some light make-up on.
Twilight had become freinds with them over the years. They had come to the Crystal Empire many years ago not long after she had arrived. They had come to be free of Discord's tyranny.
A sudden spotlight shone on the unicorn in the middle as music began to play.
'Welcome each and everyone
to our festival of fun'
Moondancer sang solo
'Something noteable and new'
Moondancer sang with Lyra and Minuette who appeared, one on each side of the stage then both dissappeared back into the wings as moondancer continued.
'We bring glamor from afar,
Plus a touch of the bizarre'
Then all four of Moondancer's freinds appeared two on each side and all sang.
'And It's only for you!'
Then the four disappeared again as Moondancer continued.
'Let us tell you of this place
while assembled on our stage'
Then the four came back out and sang in chourus
'To fantastic to be true'
Though the others were still on stage she sang solo again
'listen to us as we speak
This place is really quite unique'
'And It's only for you'
The five sang in unicine as the also did a sort of dance routine
If it's marvel and adventure
that your soul and body crave
You'll be leaving here content
without a doubt
Are you ready?
Are you willing?
Are you are you ready for the day?
There's an oh so simple way of finding out!
Though her friends remained on stage Moondancer sand solo again
'Is your life a little humdrum? 'She did an obviously fake yawn of boredom while singing that line
'Is your life a little glum?'
All her friends joined in after that
We've a remedy for all who wear a frown
We wont bite you we'll delight you
We invite you to have fun,
At this specail celebration
Which is held to help power up
our special crystal heart!
Then four stallions ran onto stage as Moon dancer moved to the side and the other four sat in a row looking upstage at the stallions.
We've got jugglers from the east
We've got food to have a feast
Then all the mares, except Moon Dancer, joined in
We're a pretty heady brew
Moon shrugged in agreement as she walked back to the center stage as the colts went back to singing solo,
We've fiddler from the west
who is said to be possessed
And then all mares stood and joined with the colts
And It' only for you!
All the mares began to sing again, without the colts, as Moon was lifted by the stallions
We bring magic
And all the Mares' horns lit with sparks of magic
Me bring mirth,
we've been halfway round the earth
From Canterlot to Timbucktoo
All mares joined hooves for balance as the stood on their hind legs to show what they could do
To present to you today
this wonderful display
And then all sang in unison again
Which is only for you!
Moon dancer moved in front of he friends and smiled brightly
Then all continued singing and the mares went back onto the ground standing normal
Such a show you've never seen
such a show there's never been
And today's our grand debut
Prince and pauper come on in
let the spectacle begin
And the mares, except MD, did something that surprised the monies. All lined up they all slid down into a split
'cuz its only for you!
The mares moved out of splits while staying sitting as the stallions lifted moon dancer up once again and all sang more loudly with extra enthusiasm
Let the banners be unfurled
Raise the curtain on our world
without anymore ado
then moon dancer was allowed to free fall for a moment and was caught right before hitting the ground giving the audience of ponies a small scare. Then the mares sang alone.
The Crystal Empire has all you need
satisfaction guaranteed
By now Moon was back on the ground and made her way to the front before all mares sang again
and it's only for you!
At the same time the stallions began to sing their own part
Welcome each and everyone
To our festival of fun
And all joined in for the finale as moon dancer was lifted onece again but higher then before
For you!
And the music stopped and the curtain closed as fireworks went off the audience broke out into cheers and shouts for the amazing show and the current fireworks.
MEANWHILE backstage, The group of mares were talking to Twilight and her daughter
"Girls that was amazing!" Twilight beamed
"Thanks" Moon Dancer smiled sheepishly
"I just don't know where those fireworks came from, were those even supposed to happen?" Twinkle Shine asked
"Mommy said I could." The little alicorn replied
"Really you did those?" Lyra asked in surprise
"She is very talented" Twilight smiled "Aren't you Morning Glory?"
The filly smiled and nodded "I guess I am,."
"Wait did she create those with her magic?" Sugar Hearts Was still shocked
"Yes I did!" Morning Beamed pridefully for her talents
"Well, she will be great at magic someday" Moon Dancer smiled
"Yes she will." Swilight said before nuzzling her filly.
As much as Sunset wanted to continue watching it was getting late, She wanted to tell her mentor all she knew about how Twilight was doing in her new life, And that her spell had been successful. So sunset decided to go back into the castle, she would continue her observations on the other princesses tomorrow. |
New Fairy Tail | Specail Day | Fluttershy sat with CC in the castle gardens both playing together as they has done the past 6 years of their life.
They had become like sisters in those years. No pony could come between them.
"So Fluttershy, anything happening this week?" CC asked her best freind
"Nothing I know of." Fluttershy replied
"You sure? No specail events happening in the next few days?" CC pressed on
"Nothing comes to mind" Fluttershy said obviously oblivious to what CC was reffering to
"Nothing on Saturday?" CC continued hoping Fluttershy would catch on
"Oh! Yah" Fluttershy gasped in realization "Mother is taking me to voulenteer at the Canterlot animal shelter! Shenks for reminding me!" Fluttershy smiled brightly
"Wait, WHAT!?" CC exclaimed "Your voulenteering on Saturday? Of all days you chose Saturday?!" CC exclaimed clearly hurt Fluttershy wouldnt be hanging oit with her that day, that verry specail day.
"I know, but it's the only time mother has some free time. We've been planing on this for so long. I cant beleive I almost forgot!" Fluttershy said apologetically
"Wait months?You two have been plannong this little borulenteer trip for months!?" CC still shocked at Fluttershy not remembering what Saturday was!
"Yah! It would have been so horrible if I had forgotten!" Fluttershy frowned "I need to go remind mother just in case she forgot. I hope she hasn't!"
"Wait but-" CC began 't finnish as Flutters was already flying away."How can you forget such a special day?" CC whispered on the verge of tears.
"So mother?" Fluttershy asked flying up to her unknowingly adopted mother "How are preparations going?"
"So far they are going great" Bon Bon hugged her filly "Creative doesn't suspect a thing right?"
"Nope. We cant ler her ruin the suprise. Hopefully I can prevent her from spoiling the surprise" Fluttershy frowned not wanting to hid rhings from her freind but, it was for CC's own good. All Fluttershy needed to do was keep things a secret, no matter what.
A few days later the two ponies were playing in the gardens again as usual.
"Fluttershy, are you sure you dont know what happens on Saturday." CC asked out of the blue while they created flower crowns out of daisies.
"Like I said my mom and I are going to the shelter." Fluttershy repeated for what felt like the thousandth time
"NO!" Creative cried out inftustration "Fluttershy we have been freinds since we were 6 years old! Hpw would you not know what happens then! Saturday is a Verry important day for me!"
"Me too!" Flutters replied with fake frustration, she was only pretending as you may know.
"But you cant go to the shelter!" CC exclaimed
"I can and I am!" Fluttershy replied
"But not Saturday!" CC argued
"And why not?" Fluttershy asked
"Because!" CC responded irritated at the other pegasuss. "You know what, forget it go ahead and go do what you want! I really don't care!" she said even though she did care that her best friend didn't realize how special the upcoming weekend was to her
"I'll see you later Flutters" she frowned before taking off into the sky and flying towards one of the castle windows.
Fluttershy shook her head with a light chuckle "Creative, you'll understand in time... I'm sorry but I'm doing this because we are such good friends and I have to do something for you." Fluttershy smiled and walked off to find her mother.
Fluttershy and BonBon walked through the castle as silently as possible. It was earlier than they normally woke up and BonBon had hoped to sleep a little more that day as it was Saturday, but alas with Fluttershy wanting to do something special for Creative Cloud she had to make sure it was perfect.
Soon the two made it out of the castle and into the streets of Canterlot towards a building that was old and commonly unoccupied, sort of like most of the buildings there since Discord had come into power.
When Fluttershy and BonBon got inside the building there were party decorations everywhere. There were tables set up and it looked like it would be an epical party
"Oh, this is so pretty" Fluttershy said in awe "CC is going to live it!"
"I'm sure she will" Fluttershy's adopted mother responded
"Thank you, mother"
"Oh, don't thank me." The yellow earth pony smiled "All the credit goes to a couple of party ponies who I hired for this."
"Well, they are really good at parties." Fluttershy responded still in awe
"Well we are professionals!" A bubbly pink mare exclaimed popping out of nowhere and startling the yellow pegasus
"Oops sorry!" The mare apologized "I didn't mean to startle you."
"Oh, um... It's okay" The shy pegasuss forgave her
"I'm Pinkie Pie by the way! What's you're name?"
"Oh, I'm Fluttershy." She said hiding behind her mane
"Hmm, that name sounds really familiar." Pinkie said pondering on where she may have heard it before
"Where's Cheese?" BonBon asked changing the subject. She knew this was dangerous and could really upset the king if he found out. If Pinkie remembered she'd tell Fluttershy and then they'd seek out the others and as much as Equestria needed that it couldn't happen, at least not yet.
"Oh," Pinkie said snapping out of her thoughts "He's..."
"Right here." The orange earth colt said coming down some stairs that led to a second floor.
"Oh, thank you so much!" Fluttershy smiled brightly "Thank you! CC is going to love it!"
Pinkie walked to give the filly a hug "Any thing for a freind!" Pinkie beamed
It was about 11 AM. CC sat sadly on a cotten candy cloud. This was supposed to be the best day ever for her... but it just wasnt the same. Her best freind had forgotten such a specail day, she just couldnt enjoy it without Fluttershy.
"Hey CC" Fluttershy's soft voice sounded behind the pink pegasus.
"hey flutters." CC mumbled sadly
"So, I was wondering if you want to come wirh me to the shelter?"
"Why?"
"Well, I just think we would have fun together." Fluttershy smiled at her friend
CC was still upset ay fluttershy nut she didnt want to hold a grudge so she nodded.
Fluttershy got realy exited and grabbed her best freind's hoof "Come on my mom is already there waiting!"
Fluttershy and CC flew quickly though CC still frowned. A few minutes later the two sister-like freinds arrived at an opd building rhat seemed abandoned but wasn't apparently.
Before Creative could notice fluttershy put a blindfold over CC's eyes.
"Fluttershy what..." CC rried to aske
"Trust me." Was all Fluttershy said as she led her pink pegasus freind into the building
When they got inside Fluttershy removed CC's blindfold but the room was pitch black... that is until Cheese Sandwich switched on the lights.
CC looked around and saw... party decorations pink and teal streamers, baloons and a banner that said 'Happy 12th Birthday Creative Cloud' There were a couple of presents on a table. CC's frown instantly turned into a smile.
"You remembered!"
"Of course I did." Fluttershy replied "You think I would forget you're birthday?"
"I thought you did..." CC replied honestly but her eyes dilled with happy tears. She hugfed her freind "Oh, thank you so much!"
"I also got you a couple of presents but the one I'd like to give to you first is this." Fluttershy smiled holding a little box wrapped in majenta wrapping paper.
Creative opened it and inside were a pair of earings, (her ears were peirced when she was 8) they wre both made from lego's most was blue bit there was a stripe of white netween the top lego and rhe middle one, there was also a little white peice on top. Along with the earings was a miniature blue box also made out of legos. It actually had lines on it for design and on the top it said 'Poleice Public Call Box'
"Oh, my gosh where did you find these?" CC asked in awe.
"I bought them at a lego store not too far put of canterlot. I saw them and instantly got them for you." Fluttershy explained
"Oh thank you."
And so the two freinds went about talking and celebrateing CC's birthday.
After the party Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich walked out of Canterlot side by side
"I know what tou did Marina." Pinkie pie said to.. somebody and since ot was the first time Cheese had seen he do it, it confused him.
'Yah and?'
Cheese was suprised by the voice coming from nowhere
"Why did you do that? I thought you wanted..."
'No Pinkie! NO spoilers!'
"I know But..."
'No! It's my birthday! Please dont spoil anything for the readers!"
"The who?" Cheese asked
"Readers." Pinkie responded before turning back ro me "Fine, I'll pretend to not remember anything... I'll wait till the time comes."
'Ugh good enough.' |
New Fairy Tail | IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT! | Hello readers.
Welcome to my Author's Note!
I know, I know, you haven't read a word of this story in years and now you get... an Authors note.I promise you it is nothing bad, so bear with me. Please.
I started this story in mid 2015. That's almost six years ago! SIX YEARS! I wrote twelve chapters (even if some of them were short) from May to October. Wow!
And then I stopped.
I'm going to be honest here, I was really young when I started these, I began writing on a whim and didn't take time to edit and revise, I just wrote and posted and was happy with it. But, as I kept writing and eventually began revising, I was realising that what I wanted to create and where my writing was at at the time were two entirely different levels. It was just notwhere I wanted it to be.
I stoped.
I tried to take time to read and improve my writing. I fell out of the habit of posting... But I never stopped creating. I have notebooks upon notebooks of tidbits and scenes that I've written for this and other stories. Ever since I stopped posting I've wanted to redo my stories, to get to a point where I could create them and be happy with their quality. My writing isn't perfect but it has improved.
I'm ready to start writing again-or more accurately, to start posting again. All my stories, this one in particular, have evolved and changed so much, but at heart they are the same as what they started with-what I wanted them to be. The stakes are... a bit higher, the characters (hopefully) are more real as I've come to better know and understand them in the context of this world.
I'm am rebooting New Fairy Tail. And I'm excited!
It's time to expect the Unexpected
It's time for higher stakes! It's not just Discord being a jerk and taking over. He had some real reasons in the original but I never quite got there... whoops! This time, the reasons won't just be jealousy and revenge, as good as those motives are. But you'll see what I mean.
I just want to say, I went back and re-read this story, I do still love it so much, rough as it was. I also re-read the comments and... my heart! 3 Everyone was so sweet and supportive of this little child with a keyboard who loved to write and didn't care if it was top tier or not. So thank you to everypony on fanfiction and fimfiction who took the time to review because you are what has kept me going on this story and what made me want to make it better. Please, please, please, If you read this the first time around and loved it despite the errors and the waits, please give me a second chance, come see what I desperately wanted this story to be.
Love you guys! And wish me luck!
NFT IS COMING BACK TO LIFE!
Tune in Next Friday August 20 to see this revived! And here's a short little preview ;)
In a world brimming with magic, one never knows what to expect. You could spend a whole lifetime preparing for one single moment and still be caught off guard and surprised by the outcome.
In a fairytale such as this our heroes may surely never know the true path that lies ahead of them... they can only hope for the best and choose whether or not to be dissatisfied with the outcome of life.
Welcome, dear readers, to a whole different type of fairy tail. A new Fairy Tale.
One that begins this terribly stormy night...
Thunder cracked through the air, violently interrupting the stillness of the night. Faster than the storm clouds had appeared, ponies had abandoned the streets for shelter within homes and open shops. The sun had only recently set, but the night life was already suppressed by the unplanned storm.
Deep within the shadows of the city crept a long serpentine like creature, paw and claw glinting dangerously if ever the light caught them. His destination? The castle. The Crown Jewel of Canterlot. A grand palace of marble which glimmered and shone, even in the dark night. It's purple and gold spires were as radiant in the night as in the day.
It had been a long time since he'd stepped lizard leg or cloven hoof within these walls. But his return was a long time coming.
This is going to be fun...
The monumental structure exuded regality and commanded respect from all who passed by. It was a fortress at one time, one he'd readily and easily infiltrate.
Tonight was the night he'd waited a millenia for. |
Darkness Surrounding | pre | "Yes Dashy" asked Fluttershy running a hoof through Rainbow's mane
"You think since I'm grounded for the next few weeks that I could stay at your place?" asked Rainbow loving having Fluttershy's gentle hoof playing with her mane
"I would love to have you come over for awhile Dashy" replied Fluttershy nuzzling her friend again "maybe while your over we could even have some snuggle time like we used to?"
"Oh I think we are long over due for some snuggle time" replied Rainbow nuzzling Fluttershy before pulling back and laying back down on her bed a familiar flush on her cyan cheeks "escpecialy now that I can't fly" added Rainbow grumpily
At this moment a doctor walked into the room. Noding to the two pegasi he cleared his throat.
"Miss Dash I am here to inform you that you can leave when you like. Your wing is healed enough for you to walk around. But don't try to fly or you may actually break your wing for good this time." informed the Doctor looking straight at Rainbow as he said that last part "Your free to go just be careful and keep your bandages on. We'll need you to come in for the next three weeks to check on your progress of course"
As Dash was loaded into a wheelchair and carted throught the hospital halls towards the exit she turned to the doctor and asked "So how much am I paying for this?"
The Doctor smiled and replied "Your not paying for any of it Miss Dash"
"Say what?" asked Rainbow confused "Then who is"
The doctor pointed his muzzle in the direction of a cream colored pegasus at the front desk.
"Fluttershy?!" asked Rainbow dumbfounded "but why?"
"I don't know" said the Doctor at first "I think It's her way of making it up to you"
"What do you mean?" replied Rainbow not quite getting what he was hinting at
"Well you got hurt rescuing her" said the Doctor "She's paying you back in only way she can"
Rainbow looked at her friend with renewed admiration when the doctor chuckled a bit to himself causing Rainbow's attention to shift back to him. "Honestly Miss Dash of all the hooves you could have fallen into" he said as Fluttershy started towards them "I don't think you could have done better..."
"Hi Dashy" said Fluttershy smiling at the doctor first then looking at her friend with a familiar fondness in her eyes "Ready to go?"
"Always" replied Rainbow smiling at her friend Rainbow liked how Fluttershy always had such happiness in her eyes. She was actually rather jealous of that but she'd never say anything about it to Fluttershy or anypony else for that matter. She got up out of the wheel chair and walked out the main hospital door with Fluttershy beside her.
It didn't take long to get back to Fluttershy's cottage. Rainbow sat back as Fluttershy opened the door. Fluttershy let Rainbow go inside first before closing the door behind them. Rainbow let out a breath of relief when she sat down on Fluttershy's couch. Her eyes then immediately went to the rather life sized rug in the corner of the living room. Except it wasn't a rug, it was breathing!
"Why hello there Miss Dash" said a voice in her head "Fluttershy has told me much about you"
"Who's that?" asked Rainbow surprised at this invasion of privacy "Where are you?"
"I'm that rug in the corner" the voice said sarcasticly adding "and yes I'm breathing"
Noticing the look of surprise on Rainbow's face Fluttershy giggled a bit then said "Dashy meet Silver Streak" indicating the now sitting up snow pelted wolf in the corner of the room "I believe you've met already"
"Yeah we have" replied Rainbow with a frown thinking to herself "Why is that thing here?"
"Well this thing" said the voice in her head rather rudely "Is Fluttershy's friend. She did me a kindness by helping to heal the wounds I got saving you from that hydra a few days ago"
"Did he just read my thoughts?" asked Rainbow extending a hoof to Fluttershy
"Yes he does that sometimes" said Fluttershy glaring at Silver "though I keep telling him not to pry into other peoples personal thoughts"
"Sorry Fluttershy" replied Silver to both pegasus looking at Fluttershy "but she called me a thing"
Fluttershy couldn't help but laugh at this "Is that all?" when her laughter calmed down a bit she added "i think you two will get along just fine"
"Wait he's staying her too?" asked Rainbow in disbelief her eyes begging Fluttershy to say no
"Sorry Dashy" replied Fluttershy walking over to Rainbow and nuzzling her softly "but I couldn't leave him alone when he was injured."
"Yeah I guess your right Pal" replied Rainbow nuzzling her friend back with a little bit of a blush
Silver stood up and made for the door. "Where are you going Silver?" asked Fluttershy in a questioning tone
He turned around and looked at both pegasi and said "I want to give the two of you that "snuggle time" you both are thinking about" when both pegasus looked at each other with a blush he added "and I wanted to grab a bite to eat anyways"
"but there's food in the kitchen?" said Fluttershy confused
Silver shook his head "I can't eat pony food" he gestured outside in the direction of the forest "I have to eat meat. I'm a wolf after all"
"Oh I see" said Fluttershy wincing at the word meat "Does that mean for the last few days...?"
"Oh no I didn't eat any of your furry friends Fluttershy" replied Silver putting a paw to his chest "not even that annoying little bunny Angel. I've been sneaking off into the forest for food while you slept."
"Alright" replied Fluttershy half-heartedly "Just be careful okay?"
"I will try" said Silver opening the door and walking outside closing it behind him
Fluttershy looked over at her friend to see a warm comforting smile on her face. Fluttershy liked that smile. "So now that he's gone is it snuggle time?" she asked with a chuckle
"Yes it is" replied Rainbow as Fluttershy got up on the couch next to her
"Good" replied Fluttershy scooting closer to her friend on the couch laying her head on Rainbow's shoulder nuzzling into her
"I've missed this" said Rainbow nuzzling her friend back sighing "With all the training I've been doing for the Wonderbolts audition coming up next month, I've been to busy to come by as much as I should have"
Fluttershy pulled her head back and looked Rainbow in the eye nearly getting lost in those indigo swirls and said "Well we have time now let's make the best of it"
"Alright" said Rainbow falling onto her back her head in Fluttershy's lap "I had better make myself comfy then huh?" Rainbow smiled as she felt the familiar comfort of her friends lap beneath her head.
"Comfy?" asked Fluttershy giggling to herself as she looked at her friend as she smiled back up at her
"Yeah pal your lap is the greatest pillow ever" said Rainbow snuggling into her friends lap sighing contently
"Well I'm glad you think so Dashy" said Fluttershy running her hoof through Rainbow's mane Fluttershy loved snuggle time with her friend. She knew Rainbow liked it too, but Fluttershy loved it even more because secretly she thought of Rainbow as her special somepony. She'd never admit it though especially not to Rainbow. Fluttershy knew that she had said she would be her special somepony while she was medicated but she didn't count that.
Fluttershy wondered how Rainbow did it? How could she be so Tomcoltish and yet have so much feminine charm when it mattered. She didn't even need to try to stay beautiful it just came naturally. She had to fight off the urge to lean down and kiss her right there and now instead she brought her head down and nuzzled her friend on the nose.
Rainbow blushed slightly at Fluttershy's closeness. To anypony watching it would seem that they were in love. Lucky nopony ever does and truth be told they did this sort of thing all the time. They were foalhood friends and were perfectly comfortable being this close to one another. But man what Rainbow would do to get Fluttershy to lean down and kiss her right now. Rainbow had a playful Idea run through her head.
Rainbow reached up with a hoof and grabbed Fluttershy's mane pulling it down near her face. Fluttershy let out a giggle as Rainbow pretended to go to sleep taking the ensnared mane with her dragging Fluttershy on top of her. "Now look at that" said Rainbow with a laugh "You've gone and fallen all over me Pal"
Fluttershy's cheeks flushed crimson at these ironically chosen set of words and she replied "Well it would help if you weren't so awesome" then she pulled herselfonto Rainbow's belly and laid her head under Rainbow's chin. "Now who makes the best pillow?" she asked teasingly poking Rainbow in the stomach
Rainbow let out a rather girly eep at being poked in her belly but immediately hid it by saying "Well I can't help being awesome" said Rainbow "It's what I do, but even if I am 20% more awesome you still make the better pillow Pal. Although," she added running her hoof through Fluttershy's mane "You do make a really great blanket"
Fluttershy nuzzled Rainbow leaning up to plant a sweet kiss on her nose before saying "I might be a nice blanket for you but I'm getting a little cold Dashy"
"I think I can fix that Pal" replied Rainbow wrapping her hooves around Fluttershy and nuzzling her back "There how about that?"
"I can think of a more awesome blanket Dashy" replied Fluttershy blushing a bit nuzzling her friend kissing her on the cheek "Your so soft and warm"
This caused Rainbow to blush a bit "Hey don't tell the girls that Pal" she nuzzled her friend before adding "I don't want them thinking I'm a softie"
Fluttershy giggled as she replied "I won't Dashy. I promise" She liked seeing this side of Rainbow. Rainbow was always kind to her. It was different when they were with their friends and around town, but here in her home Rainbow was at peace. It was a different side of Rainbow that nopony but Fluttershy ever saw.
"I know you won't Pal" replied Rainbow looking down at her friend with eyes full of admiration "You always keep your promises" then she decided to ask something that had been on her mind "Hey Pal can I ask something?"
"Anything Dashy, you know that" replied Fluttershy with a sigh breathing into Rainbow's chest fur
"back at the hospital I was there for three days and I was asleep for two of them correct?" asked Rainbow just confirming her suspicion
"That's right" replied Fluttershy looking up at her with worry in her eyes "Why is something wrong?"
"No" said Rainbow reassuringly "I just wanted to make sure is all" Rainbow waited for Fluttershy to settle back down before she asked "So how many times did you visit me while I was out those two days?"
Fluttershy's head shot up at this unexpected question. "Dashy.." started Fluttershy nervously
"I'm just asking" replied Rainbow running a hoof through Fluttershy's mane "You don't need to tell me if you don't want to"
Fluttershy knew that Dashy wanted to hear the truth so she took a breathe and replied "6 times the first day and the entire second day" as she hurridly finished her sentence she looked up to see Rainbow's expression To her surprise it had a smile on it.
"Oh you had a extreme patient to take care of all right." Rainbow said nuzzling her friend causing her to blush "It was me wasn't it?"
"Yes it was" replied Fluttershy blushing fiercely now "Silver had almost entirely recovered within an hour of his first treatment so I decided you deserved my full attention in your time of recovery. I asked the nurse if I was allowed to stay after visiting hours to keep you company"
"That's really sweet Pal" said Rainbow nuzzling her friend and holding her a bit closer now "Thanks, but you didn't need to pay for it too"
"Well it's my fault you got hurt in the first place" replied Fluttershy remorsefuly looking at Rainbow's bandaged wing "When I heard you were still paying off your last hospital visit I just had to help. I know it doesn't make up for everything but it's all I could think of to... well... say thanks"
"Shy.." breathed Rainbow nuzzling her friend and pulling Fluttershy's head up subconsciously
"Yes Dashy" replied Fluttershy crawling up her friend blushing hard with what she hoped to come
"Your so kind to me.." said Rainbow closing her eyes pulling Fluttershy closer to her still
"I told you Dashy" said Fluttershy almost in a whisper leaning her head towards Rainbow's "I'll always be there for you"
Rainbow could feel Fluttershy's breath on her lips and she began to blush at what was about to come next. In the back of her mind came a thought. "What if Fluttershy doesn't want this?" It said to her clouding her mind "What if you are making her do this?" Rainbow didn't get a chance for another thought as a pair of lips met hers.
Fluttershy melted into Rainbow as she kissed her softly. She pressed her body against her friend feeling Rainbow's hooves around her release their grip. Rainbow's head was spinning as she tried to stay in control of herself. Fluttershy pulled her head back to catch her breath and look at Rainbow a look of worry on her face.
"Dashy I'm sorry I thought that you felt the same way.." said Fluttershy looking away shyly "I'm so sorry"
Rainbow shook her head once to clear it and looked at her friend. The face which she adored so much now wore a sad frown. It tore a hole in Rainbow's heart to see her friend that way. Rainbow reached out a hoof and brushed Fluttershy's mane out of her face revealing the tears in her eyes. Rainbow put a hoof under Fluttershy's chin and pulled her head up to meet her eyes.
"I never said I didn't like it Shy" said Rainbow with a smile Fluttershy's expression brightened immensely. "But, I'm afraid I don't know exactly how I feel. I know you are my best friend and I know I love snuggling with you and I want to spend as much time with you and possible. I'm just not sure.."
At this Fluttershy looked Rainbow in the face and said "Dashy I love you" Rainbow blush immensly at Fluttershy's straightforwardness it was so unlike her usual timid self. Fluttershy had expected this but hoped it wouldn't be a problem. Being a tomcolt for most of her life she had been teased constantly for being a fillyfooler. It was a dark part of Rainbow's past that not many knew about besides Fluttershy. "I know you didn't being liked being called a fillyfooler."
"Shy..." said Rainbow stunned at the raw emotion Fluttershy was displaying. Tears streamed down her face in force and started to wet Rainbow's chest fur.
"I'm so sorry Dashy" cried Fluttershy between sobs burying her head in Rainbow's chest fur "I just hope we can still be friends. I don't want to lose you.."
"Shy" said Rainbow holding her friend in a tender embrace "I've already told you, Nothing will ever come between us. I will always have your back no matter what."
"But I k-kissed you" said Fluttershy tears still flowing she wrapped her hooves around Rainbow and squeezed hard
Rainbow took a deep breath and asked "How long have you loved me Shy?" Fluttershy stopped crying long enough to squeak out
"Since 5 years ago" she squeaked "When you came to Ponyville for your weather job and I ran into you"
Rainbow was speachless. Five years ago. Rainbow remembered five years ago. She had just flunked out of flight school, to many rules was her excuse. The real reason was she did everything she could to fail. Ditch class, not study, didn't do homework. She had wanted to drop out but her parents wouldn't let her. So she had failed out on purpose and then her parents had kicked her out on her own.
They didn't want such a failure as their daughter they had said. They had told her that she could come back when she had become a success. She didn't even care. She had wanted that to happen. All because of a certain Filly from her foalhood. A cream colored ground loving pegasus who had left flight school a few years back to live a simpler life.
She would have thrown away her life to have been able to see that pegasus again. She had been her first friend and she had left her there all on her own in a strange town. Fluttershy was her name and she was not the greatest flier but she had the biggest heart Rainbow had ever seen. She had worked out a deal with her uncle to get her the job as a weather pegasus to cover her mysterious arrival in Ponyville.
Now here was the very same pegasus she had thrown away everything she had once dreamed about to be with pouring her heart out to her. "What am I doing?!" thought Rainbow furious with herself for her own self doubt She gently took Fluttershy's head in her hooves and lifted it off her chest. She brought it up to her own and kissed her friend passionately
Fluttershy felt her heart flutter as Rainbow kissed her. All the tears stopped as she melted into Rainbow loosening her grip on her to a soft hug. She thought she would faint right there. This was her dream, her one secret wish. For this moment in Fluttershy's mind Rainbow was not just her friend she was much more than that. She was her special somepony.
Rainbow didn't flinch away this time. All the doubt in her mind had left to be replaced by something more. A heat rose over here. A feeling she had never felt before. It wasn't a bad feeling. It felt... right. Rainbow never wanted this moment to end. She pulled Fluttershy closer to her a warmth rising in her stomach. She needed to breathe but took a sharp breath through her nose to keep going.
Acting on instinct Rainbow brushed her tongue against Fluttershy's lips.
Fluttershy gasped a little at Rainbow's urgency. Rainbow took no time rushing her tongue inside Fluttershy's mouth feeling around flavoring it. It tasted of salad and sweet spices, yet strangely the only word Rainbow could use to describe the flavor was a word: Fluttershy. Fluttershy pulled back a bit her comfort zone broken a bit by Rainbow's tongue play.
Rainbow pulled back as well taking a breath of air "Are you okay Fluttershy?" she asked putting a hoof on her friends cheek "Did I go to far?"
"Dashy" said Fluttershy blushing furiously looking Rainbow in the eye Fluttershy didn't know why she had backed out. It would be a lie if she said she didn't like it. It was just all happening so fast. "No you didn't go to far" Fluttershy said reassuringly nuzzling her friend affectionately
"Just to fast then?" Rainbow said with a laugh nuzzling Fluttershy back "Sorry Shy"
"Being fast is part of who you are Dashy" replied Fluttershy giving her friend a peck on the cheek "I wouldn't want to change ever. I just need to ask a question. Does this mean we are going out now?"
"Does this answer your question Shy?" said Rainbow planting another light kiss on her new marefriends lips
Fluttershy giggled in delight and nuzzled into Rainbow laying her head on Rainbow's shoulder "I'll take that as a yes" She let out a content sigh and shut her eyes falling fast asleep in her marefriends safe embrace. Rainbow eyed her new marefriend with loving eyes and soon drifted off to sleep herself. |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 4 | A lot of drama and emotions tossed around in this Chapter. You are Warned.
The sun was going down over the Everfree forest as Twilight cantered along. She wanted to find out where the hydra had come from that had attacked Ponyville. She had decided not to wake Sigil since he needed all the rest he could get, so she had enlisted the help of Applejack. At first she had been reluctant to go, but Twilight had done some tough negotiating and finally got her come along.
"Ay can't believe your holding that over my head again Twilight" whined Applejack from beside Twilight
"How else would I have got you to come along?" said Twilight in light tone "Besides that's not something you do at a slumber party"
"Tell that to Rarity" mumbled Applejack just loud enough for Twilight to hear "Anyways why are ya'll out here anyways?"
"I wanted to see what that Hydra was doing in Ponyville" replied Twilight "It had to have a reason"
"Well I reckon your right" said Applejack "Them critters never come near Ponyville"
"Hey Applejack come look at this" said Twilight pointing to a strange foot print on the ground "What do you think it is?"
"I'm not sure Twilight" said Applejack poking it with a hoof suspiciously "Definitely not Hydra that's for sure" A bird flew out of a tree just a few feet away letting out an alarm call.
"What was that for" complained Twilight covering her ears
"That was an alarm call Sugarcube" said Applejack getting worried She began looking around frantically "And it means there's something here with us"
"Like what?" asked Twilight trying to peer through the thick undergrowth of the forest floor
"I'm betting the thing that made that there..." Applejack got no farther A Manticore jumped out of the tree to Applejack's left catching her by surprise. It side swiped her with a massive forepaw launching her into Twilight knocking them to the ground in a heap. Applejack and Twilight rolled out of the way as the Manticore dived for them. It's teeth chomped down on air as Applejack pivoted on her front hooves and gave it a traditional Apple Family Apple Buck to the side of it's head.
It lost it's balance as it feel on it's side. Twilight didn't hesitate to use the opportunity her friend had given her. Calling on her magic, her horn flaring purple, she brought the roots of the nearby trees shooting out of the ground ensnaring the Manticore. It didn't want to give up without a fight though it began flailing around wildly trying to escape. Applejack ran up and did a pile-driver on it's skull sounding a resounding crack with her elbow.
The Manticore's eyes rolled back in it's head as it lost consciousness.
"What the hey is a Manticore doing this close to Ponyville?" asked Applejack looking at her flank to see if that swipe had left any marks She let out a sigh of relief that it was just a scratch
"I don't know" replied Twilight "but it seemed to be in more of a panic than anything else"
"What do ya mean sugarcube?" asked Applejack finding her hat and putting it back atop it's proper place
"Well it was hiding from us in the first place" said Twilight thinking "then it ambushed us once it realized we weren't what was chasing it"
"Very observant of you" said a voice from behind Twilight
Twilight and Applejack turned simultaneously to see who said that. When they looked their jaws dropped. There standing next to the Manticore was a island teal unicorn with pale blue hair. She was wearing a magician's cape and hat painted black with gold stars.
"Trixie?!" both Twilight and Applejack screamed in unison
"Yes it is me the Great and All Powerful Trixie!" replied Trixie in mock applause "why are you so surprised to see me?"
"What are you doing in the Everfree forest?" asked Twilight backing up a little Something was off about Trixie but Twilight couldn't put her hoof on it.
"I'm just gathering a few fans" she replied walking up to the Manticore examining it closely "Is that so wrong?"
"I thought we ran your flank out of town already?" yelled Applejack remembering how she had out roped by the unicorn's tricks
"Oh I really should thank you for that" said Trixie with a smile on her face "but how can I?"
"You want to thank us for running you out?" asked Twilight confused
"Oh yes" said Trixie in an honest tone "Without you mares running me out of your pathetic town I never would have found this" Trixie reached under cloak into a saddlebag and pulled out a rather beat up looking book.
"Is that..." asked Twilight stumbling over her words
"Yes it is Twilight" Trixie said with a grim smile opening the book "It's the long lost spellbook of Star Swirl the Bearded"
"Applejack we need to run" yelled Twilight grabbing her friend by the tail "NOW!"
"It's no use" laughed Trixie evily her horn glowing in black light The trees around Twilight and Applejack began to shake and bend, interlocking their branches trapping Twilight and Applejack inside with Trixie and the Manticore. "You can't escape now"
"Twilight what's going on" asked Applejack in a fearful tone
"I don't know" said Twilight swallowing the lump in her throat "We need to get that book."
"Oh don't bother" said Trixie placing her hoof on the Manticore A glowing ball of black flame enveloped it instantly. It shrunk over the Manticore and finally faded into a glowing emblem on the Manticore's forehead. The roots pinning it down burned away as the Manticore stood up and turned to Trixie. Twilight and Applejack gave each other horrified looks as the Manticore bowed to Trixie. Trixie raised her hoof and pointed at Applejack "Catch her but don't kill her"
The Manticore turned and launched itself through the air at Applejack pinning her under it's paws. Twilight tried to help her friend, but found herself hurtled into a tree by a fireball. She doused her flaming coat with summoned water and looked at Trixie who relpied "Your facing me this time Sparkle" she hurtled another fireball as she yelled "And this time I WILL WIN!"
Twilight dodged the second fireball and sent a chunk of ice flying towards Trixie in return. She simply took a step to the right and the ice flew past her. Twilight summoned more magic, her horn glowing, as she let of a powerful beam of magic at Trixie. Trixie did nothing to avoid it. She held up her hoof to the beam and it erupted into a spray of sparks upon impact. Twilight was powerless, her strongest spell blocked as if it was nothing.
Trixie disappeared in a flash to appear behind Twilight sideswiping her with a hoof to the side of the head knocking her to the ground. Trixie then grabbed Twilight by the throat with her magic and lifted her off the ground.
"Your not number one any more Sparkle" said Trixie with a dark smile "Although I really should thank you. If it wasn't for you beating me and kicking me out I never would have this power."
"What do you mean?" choked out Twilight struggling to breath against her choke hold
"When you kicked me out I was all alone" said Trixie rage boiling beneath her coat "So very alone. I was wondering around for days until it found me. I do not know it's name but it called to me. I went in to the darkness to it and it gave me a way out of my loneliness. It gave me a reason to live again"
"What is that supposed to mean?" struggled out Twilight her vision blurring from lack of air as she was lifted higher
"It means this Sparkle" Howled Trixie in rage bringing Twilight down to meet her gaze she put a hoof on Twilight's forehead as she spoke "The Darkness is coming to Equestria. And there is nothing you and your elements can do about it. The Darkness is Surrounding. Not even the Princesses can save you now. From the Darkness you came and back to it you shall go"
Twilight felt something happening to her. It was as If all the happiness and joy was being drained out of her. Her hooves stopped flailing and she went limp. All the life was being sucked out of her. Her vision blurred and faded and she was thrown into darkness. No not even darkness just nothing. The last thing she heard was "TWILIGHT!" and then there was nothing.
Sigil opened his eyes blinking them a few times to get the grogginess to go away. He sat up and stretched feeling a lot more rested than yesterday. He looked around the top floor of the library and noticed something missing. "Huh?" he thought "No Twilight" He hopped out of bed and decided to trot on downstairs and see if anypony was there. When he got downstairs he froze.
In the middle of the room Twilight's body was heaped on the floor. She was surrounded by Spike ,who was crying into his elbow, Pinkie, who's hair was flat and drained of color, Rainbow and Fluttershy, Fluttershy was crying madly into Rainbow's chest but Rainbow kept a straight face as a obvious sign of respect. There was one other pony. She was bigger than all the others and had a multicolored mane. She also had a horn and wings, an Alicorn.
"Sigil" said Rainbow in a strained voice
"Sigil Flare" called the Alicorn in a gentle tone ushering him over to sit beside her "Come over here"
Sigil trotted over to the Alicorn and sat down not taking his eyes off of Twilight for a single moment. She didn't move.
"I understand your new to Equestria" said the Alicorn obviously trying to distract Sigil from the horrific situation
"Yes I am princess" replied Sigil not knowing her actual name "What happened?"
"Call me Celestia please" she replied in a friendly tone "We don't know. In all my years I have never seen anything like it"
"Celestia..." said Sigil trying to remember where he had heard that name before Then it hit him "You were her teacher..."
"Yes" replied Celestia with a drawn out sigh "She was my honored and most precious student"
"I can't imagine how you must feel" said Sigil
"Oh I believe you can" replied Celestia placing a hoof on Sigil's shoulder
"She was my best friend" said Sigil tears welling up in his eyes "My first true friend...."
"I know how you must feel Sigil" said Celestia levitating a piece of paper over to him "That's why I want you to read this letter"
"What is it?" asked Sigil taking it wiping his eyes with his hoof
"Just read it" said Celestia knowingly
Dear Celestia,
My name is Sigil Flare. I am a newcomer to your realm. At first I was a little freaked out by your land known as Equestria but now I find it wonderful. The ponies here are very nice and friendly. I have met your student Twilight and I have to say she is becoming my best friend very fast.....
"This is just the letter I wrote to you" replied Sigil shaking his head
"Look at the extension" replied Celestia pointing with her hoof at the bottom of the letter
Sigil looked at it and read
Dear Celestia,
Above is a letter from a new friend I have made. He's not from Equestria at all. He's so strange and different. But he is also nice and funny. I've never had a friend like this before. I want to spend more time with him than any of my other friends. Is it possible that I could have a favorite friend? Or is it something else? Anyways,
your faithful student Twilight Sparkle
"You know what she means" said Celestia seeing the tears flow down Sigil's cheeks "don't you?"
"She loved me..." cried Sigil tossing the letter away
"Yes I believe she did" said Celestia a sad tone to her voice "and we don't know why or how but she's gone"
"She told me..." sniffled Sigil trying in vain to stop his tears "She told me no one else I cared for would die"
"I wish we could all keep our word" said Celestia "but we are all just ponies after all"
"No" said Sigil rubbing vigorously at his eyes to wipe away his tears "I won't let it end like this" he stood up and walked slowly and determinedly over to Twilight's body "I will keep my word. I won't let anyone, anypony, I care about die. Not again"
"Sigil.." said Celestia in a gentle tone "She's already gone"
Sigil ignored her and kneeled down next to Twilight using his magic to delve into her mind hoping to find something, anything. He closed his eyes and concentrated casting his gaze wider until he found something. A small shimmer of light in the far corner of her mind. He tried calling out to it but got no reply. Coming back to his own consciousness he took a deep breath to calm his nerves.
"She's not dead" said Sigil in a monotone voice All the crying in the room stopped.
"What do you mean?" asked Celestia hope coming to her eyes once more
"She's not dead" repeated Sigil lowering his head "She's still alive"
"How do you know?" asked Rainbow in a serious tone "How do we know your not just saying that?"
"Because I've seen this spell before" replied Sigil grimly
"How have you seen it?" asked Pinkie confused "Even Princess Celestia hasn't seen it"
"Because this spell comes from my world" replied Sigil "It's forbidden"
"If it's from your world then how the buck did it end up here in Equestria?" asked Rainbow
"I must not have been the only human to have visited your world before" said Sigil "But I know this spell and I know for a fact that Twilight is still alive"
"How can you be so sure?" asked Celestia curiously but cautiously
"Because this spell is used by those who wield dark magic" replied Sigil "it is used to drain the life force out of a person, in this case a pony, until they are nothing but an empty shell. Twilight on the other hand, erm I mean hoof, was a very powerful unicorn. She had enough power to hide some of her consciousness away in the far corners of her mind"
"You seem to know a lot about this particular spell Sigil?" asked Rainbow drilling for information
"That's because.." started Sigil "I've used it before" the room went eerily quiet once again
"You used this spell before?" asked Celestia "I thought you said it was forbidden where you come from"
"It is" replied Sigil wanting to hide from the judging eyes of the ponies in the room "I was young and powerful and mad. I don't know what I was thinking. It was just he had done so much to hurt me and h deserved it"
"Who could possibly deserve a fate such as this" asked Celestia wanting an explanation
"The bastard that murdered my family!" yelled Sigil in fury and pain tears rolled down his cheeks as he continued "Is that what you wanted to hear? That I'm nothing but a murder who ran away from home because he has done things he could never escape?"
"Sigil" murmured Rainbow having no idea how to respond
"If there is one thing you pony's can let me do" begged Sigil stomping his hoof defiantly "Let me save Twilight while there is still time"
"Sigil!" bellowed Celestia
Sigil stood his ground as Celestia stood up at full height towering over him. He closed his eyes as she trotted over to him waiting for the beating he was about to get. It never came. Sigil opened his eyes to see the Princess looking down at him with soft eyes.
"Fear nothing Sigil" said the Princess giving him a soft hug "The deeds of your past do not bind you here. You are born anew here. If you can do anything to save Twilight, I know there's nothing anypony in this room could do to stop you"
Sigil's mind shut down at this strange arrangement of words. He gave himself a mental reboot as he sunk into Celesta's hug. He knew what needed to be done all he had to do was ask. Stepping backwards Sigil clapped his hooves together to get every pony's attention.
"I can save Twilight" Sigil said "But it comes at a cost. As I said she has had her life force drained dangerously low. She doesn't have much time left if we don't act fast."
"What can you do?" asked Spike finally managing to control his breathing long enough to speak
"I can act as a conduit" explained Sigil "I can use my own life force to take that of another pony and move it into Twilight"
"Wouldn't that mean.." asked Celestia
"Yes I'm afraid so" answered Sigil sadly "there is a strong possibility that both I and the volunteer will die in the procedure"
"I'll do it" said Spike standing up and sniffling
"Spike" said Sigil in a warning tone "Do you know what your doing?"
"Twilight was like a sister to me" replied Spike wiping more tears from his eyes and putting on a determined face "She hatched me and cared for me my entire life. I owe her at least this much if not more" he looked at twilight at the floor and hardened his resolve
"Celestia?" asked Sigil nervously
"Spike knows what he's doing" said Celestia nodding slowly "Besides he's old enough to make his own decisions"
"Alright then Spike if your sure" sighed Sigil "Then give me one of your claws"
Spike took hold of his hand and bit his claw off cringing at the spike of pain. He then handed it to Sigil. Sigil took it in his mouth and cut his hoof with it. Using his blood he drew a sigil around Twilight with the claw and put two small circles on the edge and marked runes into the floor. He then sat in one circle and gestured for Spike to sit in the other one.
"I need everypony to stand back while the spell is in effect" said Sigil gesturing for everypony to take a step back "Are you ready Spike?" asked Sigil "This is your last chance to back out"
"I'm not backing out" said Spike determined "Twilight needs me"
Sigil took a deep breath as he willed the spell to commence. At once the sigil on the ground began to glow a dark crimson. As they all watched a faint blue transparent line began to emerge from Spike and began to twist into a small tornado above Twilight. Sigil reached out his hoof and grabbed it and guided it into Twilight. The strand of blue light twisted in mid air and began to worm it's way into Twilight's body which began to spasm.
Twilight opened her eyes, or at least she thought she did. She couldn't tell anymore all she saw was nothing. She couldn't remember how long she had been like this. She wondered if this was death. Twilight heard a faint noise coming from all around her. She turned around to see a light coming towards her. She reached out a hoof and touched it beginning to feel warmth run up her hoof. She was being pulled out of the darkness by this light.
What was this light Twilight asked herself. She tried to look at it but had to hide her eyes from it's bright glow. She heard a voice calling her name "Twilight" it said softly at first as she was dragged further it got louder till it was screaming her name "TWILIGHT!" then she felt weightless and warm and she was enveloped by the light.
Twilight opened her eyes feeling the lids scream protest. "Yeah she was alive alright" she thought to herself Her entire body was stiff.
"Twilight" said a familiar voice faintly She strained to turn her head in it's direction to see Spike with a pained expression on his face despite the obvious smile "Welcome back..." Then he let out one last breath and fell to the floor face first.
"Spike?" asked Twilight finding her voice returning "Spike what's wrong?" she could see a thin blue line coming out of him and floating up into the air.
"Twilight don't move" said a stallion from behind her "This isn't as easy as it looks"
"Sigil?" asked Twilight in a scared voice
"Yeah Twilight" replied Sigil panting "I'm here just sit tight and you'll be okay"
"Spike..." said Twilight a tear running down her cheek looking at her number one assistant The thin blue line stopped coming from him and disappeared into the air. The glowing sigil on the floor also faded to a bloody streak on her floor.
"Alright now you can move" said Sigil catching his breath "You may be a little stiff though, being mostly dead will do that to you"
"What?" asked Twilight picking up the lifeless body of Spike in her hooves "What did you do to Spike?"
"Twilight" said a all to familiar voice in a royal accent
Twilight turned to see Rainbow, Fluttershy, and Princess Celestia staring at her like she was a ghost.
"Princess" said Twilight all other words escaping her
"It's alright your back now" said Rainbow placing a hoof around her shoulders and drawing the unicorn into a friendly embrace
"Back?" asked Twilight confused "What are you talking..." Twilight's eyes grew wide as the memories of her recent experience in the Everfree forest came flooding back to her. She pushed Rainbow off of her as a thought struck her. "Where's Applejack?" asked Twilight scanning the room for her missing friendliest
"She's in the hospital" replied Fluttershy finally finding her voice realizing the worst was now over "She's pretty shaken up"
"What do you mean?" asked Twilight concerned "How bad is she hurt?"
"She's not hurt physically except for a few bruises and a cracked rib or two" replied Rainbow looking down at the floor continuing "But she's hurt on the inside Twi. She had to carry your body back through the Everfree all by herself. I wouldn't wish something like that on my worst enemy." finished Rainbow shuttering in disgust
"I need to go see her" said Twilight heading for the door "I need to show her I'm alright" She felt a hoof bar her way turning she saw it was the Princess herself.
"that's not a good idea" said the Princess retracting her hoof leading Twilight back to the center of the room and sitting her down on her couch
"What do you mean?" asked Twilight a little angered by the Princess's interference
"She just got to sleep a little while ago" replied Celestia in a serious tone "They had to sedate her heavily before she could even think of sleep. Then she had terrible nightmares until I arrived and put her in a trance state. Whatever happened in that forest we need to know"
"Applejack didn't say anything about it?" asked Twilight grasping for information
"She hasn't said a word since she's gotten back" said Rainbow shrugging her shoulders "and we weren't about to force her"
"Alright then I'll tell you all what happened" started Twilight taking a deep breath |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 5 | Vinyl yawned as she got out of bed. She reached over to her bedside table the oak feeling cold to her hoof. Finding her target she grasped a familiar pair of Aviator goggles and placed them upon her head. Standing up on all four hooves she shook herself to get rid of the leftover drowsiness. She then walked into the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror.
Seeing her white fur shine in the reflection of the mirror she smiled. She then ran a hoof through her frazzled blue hair getting it to fall in that hap-hazard way it always does. Satisfied with her appearance she gave a quick smirk at her double quarter note emblazoned on her flank. She looked over her shoulder as a groaning sound came from the other room.
Walking back into the bedroom Vinyl saw a lump under the sheets of her bed. Walking over she prodded it with a hoof. It rolled over taking more of the sheets with it only to pull some up over it's self and mumble something. Vinyl smiled at this.
"Hey wake up" she said again poking a bit harder this time This was met with more shifting of covers and another muffled response. The shifting of the covers had revealed to Vinyl a pair of ash colored haunches emblazoned with a treble cleft. "Take the bed out of your mouth" giggled Vinyl "Then maybe I can hear you" She took a seat on the bed next to her friend and pulled the covers off of her to reveal a pair of lavender eyes and a soft smile.
"Why do we have to get up Vi?" said the earth pony innocently "Why can't you come back to bed with me?"
Vinyl ran her hoof across her marefriend's cheek and replied "I really wish I could Tavi, but you know I have a gig today"
"But that isn't even till this afternoon?" asked Tavi putting a hoof around Vinyl slowly pulling her down towards the bed "It's not like you'll be late. Not that you'd care" Octavia giggled to herself
"What about that interview with Photo Finish?" asked Vinyl slowly moving her head towards Octavia's
"Oh Celestia forbid" over dramatized Octavia "Vinyl Scratch not showing up to a magazine interview. What is the world coming to?"
"If I didn't know any better I would think you were making fun of me?" said Vinyl her lips almost touching Octavia's
"No I just know my DJ" said Octavia as their lips met
All of Vinyl's thoughts about going early and setting up the equipment for her gig herself simply vanished. She brought her head down and turned it slightly as she met Octavia's passionate advancements. Octavia wrapped her fore-hooves around Vinyl and brought her closer. Vinyl shifted her position so that her haunches were between Octavia's.
"and I know my Cellist" said Vinyl breaking the kiss long enough to catch her breath before diving back in Vinyl was about to go further when the goggles fell off of her head in front of her. Staring at them she slowed her advances on her marefriend and sat up.
"Vi what's wrong" asked Octavia placing a hoof on her DJ's chest in concern
"Just thinking" replied Vinyl picking up the goggles and placing them back on her head
"About what?" asked Octavia sweetly running a hoof through her hair
"About four years ago..." replied Vinyl with a sigh
"We've been over this Vi" said Octavia with a sigh "It wasn't your fault, you did everything you could"
"I just can't help feeling I could have done something" said Vinyl a sad tone in her voice "I just felt so worthless"
"Your not worthless Vi" said Octavia sitting up next to her marefriend nuzzling her comfortingly "Your priceless"
"I guess your right Tavi" said Vinyl nuzzling her back "I just wish I could repay him"
"He knew the risks involved when he did it" said Octavia gently "It was his choice. He gave us our life together"
"That's true" said Vinyl a little happier She planted a kiss on Octavia's cheek before adding "Steam was never one to just jump into things he always thought them through first"
"There's the confidence I'm used to hearing" said Octavia with a adoring sigh She rested her head on Vinyl's shoulder as they sat there enjoy each others company. It was soon interrupted by a knock on their door.
"Who could that be?" asked Vinyl getting up to answer it Her horn glowed as the knob glowed. "Who is it she asked?"
"It's Fleetfoot" replied the Stallion outside the door As it opened he stepped inside and closed the door behind him.
"What's the matter?" asked Octavia curiously "I didn't know you did home deliveries?"
"I don't, but this is special" said Fleetfoot addressing them both "This message is from Princess Celestia herself"
"What does the Princess want with us?" asked Vinyl curiously
"Please not another garden party" prayed Octavia silently
"I'll cut to the chase you two" said Fleetfoot seriously "The princess requires your services not as musicians, but as soldiers once again"
"What are you talking about?" asked Octavia nervously "we were never soldiers..."
"Don't give me that crap" said Fleetfoot no humor in his voice "I know about the incidents in Canterlot University four years ago. I know that you two were involved and The Princess is asking for your assistance once again."
"How do you know about all of that?" asked Vinyl angrily "we never told you?"
"That's not important right now" said Fleetfoot dismissively "What is important is that you come to Equestria's aid once more"
"We told the Princess that we didn't want to do that sort of stuff anymore" yelled Vinyl "How dare she disrespect us like that"
"Vinyl stop it your going to get us in trouble" said Octavia wrapping a hoof around her shoulders
"The Princess regrets asking you to do this but she has no choice" said Fleetfoot shaking his head "Equestria faces a threat the size of which has never been seen"
"Is it really that bad?" asked Octavia getting a little worried "What about the elements of harmony? Can't they do something about it?"
"The elements have been considered but even their combined strength will not be enough to stop the coming darkness" said Fleetfoot in a sad tone "I'm afraid you are needed now more than ever."
"Man this sucks" murmured Vinyl thinking to herself "hold on you said you two. What about Steam?"
"We have tried to contact Mr. Gear but he will not answer" replied Fleetfoot "We were hoping you could do something about that"
"I wish I could" said Vinyl sadly "but, I don't even know where to begin to look"
"Last thing I heard" said Fleetfoot with a smile "Mr. Gear was locked up inside of an abandoned warehouse on the south side of Canterlot."
"Are you serious?" asked Vinyl a glimmer of hope appearing in her eyes
"Yes Mam" replied Fleetfoot with a salute "I expect to see you all at the palace before sun down today" With that said he walked out the door closing it behind him.
"Tavi did you hear that?!" asked Vinyl excited "We know where Steam is!"
"Vi do you think it's a good idea to just walk in on him?" asked Octavia shifting uneasily on her hooves "He may not be happy to see us"
"This is Steam we are talking about Tavi" Vinyl shot back "He's our friend of course he'll be glad to see us" Vinyl walked to her door opened it and gestured for Octavia to go first. They stepped out into the street and closed the door behind themselves.
Vinyl kept close to Octavia as they walked down the street together, occasionally bumping flanks. Someponies gave them odd looks as they walked along, but it didn't bother them. It was a good hours walk until they found what they were looking for.
At first glance it seemed to be a giant stone building which hadn't been used in what seemed like years, but upon closer inspection the door was unlocked. The windows were also opened halfway. Some of the vines covering the stone walls on the outside had been cut away recently. Most important however was that a plume of smoke was coming out of the tall brick chimney on the top of the warehouse.
"This looks like the place" said Vinyl walking up to the door and knocking
"Are you sure?" asked Octavia nervously twirling her hoof on the ground
"Positive" replied Vinyl looking over her shoulder and smiling at her nervous companion "He just needs to answer the door" After waiting for about five minutes there is no reply. Vinyl decides to check and see if it's locked. Her magic surrounds the door knob and it swings open easily.
Stepping inside Vinyl starts to gag. There was a noticeable amount of steam in the air. It had a metallic smell to it that made Vinyl cringe.
"Vi" said Octavia weakly "I think I'll stay out here and make sure you can find your way out"
Vinyl was about to make a snappy comeback until she put on her goggles and got a better look at the interior of the warehouse. It was like a wasteland of dead and forgotten machines. Metal laid everywhere haphazardly with no real rhyme or reason. "Good idea Tavi" said Vinyl with a cough "I'll holler if I need help"
Vinyl stepped carefully through the rubble trying not to cut her hooves up on the loose metal scattered on the floor. It took a while but she finally found a staircase that lead up to a small room overlooking the main floor. She trotted quickly up the staircase and over to the door into what she now believed to be the old Foreman's office. She went to open the door but froze when a voice asked from the other side
"What do you want?"
"Steam is that you?" asked Vinyl hopefully
"How do you know my name?" asked the voice curiously Vinyl could hear hoofsteps from the other side of the door now.
"It's me Steam" said Vinyl "It's Vinyl Scratch"
"Vinyl?" asked Steam "What are you doing here?"
"Looking for you of course" replied Vinyl opening the door "I've wanted to see you...." Vinyl stopped in her tracks Standing in front of her was the same stallion from four years ago. The same rust colored fur except grease stained. The same red hair except it was much longer and looked unkempt. Two things she noticed were very wrong. Where his once bright blue eyes were was a dirty strip of clothe wrapped around his head. Also his feathery wings were replaced by metal ones.
"Oh did you really?" asked Steam sarcasticly sitting on his haunches "I wish I could see you"
"Steam what happened to you?" asked Vinyl confused
"I'm not surprised you don't remember Vinyl" said Steam nonchalantly "After all it was four years ago. When my workshop burnt down and "Octavia" he practically spit her name out "was caught inside I went back in after her. As a result she lost her eyes and I lost my wings"
"I remember that but.." started Vinyl starring wide-eyed at her old friendliest
"At the hospital when I awoke I woke up to find myself alone" continued Steam anger creeping into his voice "Where was my friend at. Where was my dear Vinyl Scratch? You were with Her!"
"What are you talking about?" asked Vinyl shying away from Steam a little scared
"I'm talking about you picking her over me!" yelled Steam losing his temper for a bit
"I told you Steam your like my brother" said Vinyl trying to calm him down
"I gave her my sight" said Steam darkly "In hopes that in appreciation you would pick me over her. I can see now I was wrong. That I was nothing compared to her."
"Steam.." mumbled Vinyl not knowing what else to say
"I have lived in nothingness for so long Vinyl." said Steam "The only thing that kept me going was my hope that one day you would come for me. I learned soon however that you would not. My heart broke on that day, and has since been wrought in cold steel"
"Steam I'm right here I did come for you" said Vinyl taking a step towards him
Steam stood up and walked over to the window overlooking the workshop floor. "Yes but you only came because someone asked you too" he said harshly "Isn't that right? You are here to persuade me to meet with you and "her" at the palace tonight correct?"
"Well ya, but..." admitted Vinyl
"Then your effort is wasted" said Steam cutting her off mid sentence "I see no reason I should help you fight the coming darkness. For I have no light left in me"
"Steam don't say that" said Vinyl in shock
"It's true isn't it?" asked Steam motioning to himself "I have lived in a void of nothingness for four years. FOUR YEARS! Even darkness has to have light Vinyl. All I have is nothing and it is what I will live with the rest of my life. Just look at me!"
Vinyl could not believe what she was hearing. Steam ,the stallion she had gone on so many adventures with, the one person who's motto was forgive and forget, to live and fight on, had given up. It tore a hole in Vinyl's heart. She looked at her friend for a moment before she removed her goggles from her head.
"My old friend gave me these" Vinyl said in a pained voice "He told me that no matter what happens. No matter what troubles arise or what other ponies say. Nothing can stand in the way of your dreams, as long as you are willing to fight for them"
"Words of a fool" said Steam not daring to look into Vinyl's eyes
"He also had another motto" said Vinyl placing the goggles on the floor next to Steam "He always said ponies deserve a second chance. That we should forgive them their past mistakes and try to help them improve themselves. I think it's time for you to forgive yourself Steam. Before it's to late"
With that said Vinyl walked out of the room and closed the door behind her. Steam heard her hoofsteps as she walked away. He reached down where the object had been laid next to him. Upon lifting it he found it to be familiar. He moved it around in his hooves and found it to be a piece of head-ware. Putting his hoof inside he could feel an inscription.
It read "Property of my best friend Steam Gear. I don't know where he is or if he is still alive. But I know this. Wherever he is, whatever he is doing, nothing will stop him from following his dreams. I know he will be alright, because nothing can keep him down. I won't stop looking for him, this promise I make to myself. I wish I could have been there for him when he needed me most. Your friend always Vinyl Scratch."
Steam started to put it down when he heard an unfamiliar sound. It was like small drops of water hitting the ground. It was accompanied by huge intakes of air. The bitter taste of sadness and regret stung the air. Steam knew what this was. It was the sound of tears of a broken pony. The sound of it brought Steam no joy.
Vinyl cried into Octavia's chest freely, letting out all of her shattered hopes and dreams. Octavia wrapped her hooves around her marefriend and squeezed her gently.
"What's wrong?" asked Octavia nuzzling Vinyl warmly
"Steam is gone Tavi" mumbled Vinyl through her tears "He is not the pony we once knew"
"Oh Vi I'm sure he's still in there somewhere" said Octavia trying to cheer Vinyl up "Would you like me to go talk with him?"
"No" said Vinyl "He holds a grudge against you Tavi. He says that you stole me from him"
"That's ridiculous" said Octavia giggling "I cannot steal that which he did not possess."
"What?" asked Vinyl confused by Octavia's use of big words
"It means that you're my DJ Vi" said Octavia giving the unicorn a kiss on the cheek "and always will be"
"Thanks Tavi" said Vinyl her tears ebbing and coming to a stop
"Now I will go have a word with our friend" said Octavia gently She released Vinyl from her embrace and walked into the warehouse. She found the path quite easily and trotted up the stairs to the Foreman's office. She neatly wrapped on the door.
"Go away" yelled Steam from the other side
"I'm here to talk" said Octavia "I want to see you"
"Oh well isn't it funny how you can see?" said Steam sarcasticly
"It's not funny it's dreadful" replied Octavia "I want to thank you for what you've done for me"
"It's alright I don't have anything left you can take from me" said Steam harshly
"I didn't take anything from you Steam" yelled Octavia "Your my friend"
"I live in agony because of you" yelled Steam "How can you possibly still consider yourself my friend?"
"Because I know you Steam" said Octavia "I know you love Vinyl. So do I. I did not take her away from you. She chose me on her own free will"
"Thanks that makes me feel so much better" said Steam sarcasticly
Octavia had had enough of this. Her temper was spiking and that's not good. "Steam listen to me Vinyl came here because she missed her friend. Her best friend. She has not been able to forgive herself for not doing anything to help you four years ago"
"She seems fine to me" replied Steam bluntly
That was the last straw. Octavia pulled her hoof back. "You can yell at me, you can tell me my music is bad, but if you do anything to hurt my Vinyl" thought Octavia as her hoof hit the door blowing it off it's hinges and slamming it against the wall across the room "I'll kill you"
"Now look what you've done" said Steam now sitting on a stool at his desk "You've gone and done broken my favorite door"
"What is wrong with you?" screamed Octavia her temper rising once more
"You're the one getting upset?" said Steam turning to face her
"Vinyl came here for you!" yelled Octavia holding herself back from bucking his head off his shoulders "She came here to see you and reunite with her old friend Steam. The one she had been fond of. The one she always talks about. The one she used to call brother"
"So she didn't come here to talk me into going to the palace tonight?" said Steam smartly
"You of all people Steam should know Vinyl well enough to realize she doesn't give a buck about that or anything else the Princess's want." said Octavia angrily calming herself down "She came here for one reason only: to see you again"
"Then why are you here?" asked Steam curiously deliberately steering the conversation a different direction
"Because you are my friend Steam" said Octavia "But more importantly to talk some sense into you. You made Vinyl cry Steam. CRY!"
"I know" said Steam his ears drooping a bit then instantly fixing themselves making it seem to Octavia he's hiding something "But what I said is what I meant. She deserved no less than the truth"
"Do you feel nothing for her?" asked Octavia "She's is your best friend Steam surely you know that"
"Octavia" said Steam seriously "I have felt nothing for a long time"
"Steam.." said Octavia shocked
"I would like you to leave my home now" asked Steam politely "you have given me things to consider"
"I will leave" said Octavia turning to leave "but only because my friend asked me to" she threw back over her shoulder
As Octavia trotted away her hoofsteps becoming more distant, Steam sat at his desk his mind spinning. "Maybe I was wrong?" he thought to himself as he grabbed a blank blueprint off his desk and set it in front of him "Vinyl did choose who she wanted"
Steam stared into the nothingness as he battled his thoughts. He came to a conclusion once he started drawing his next machine. "I think I will go and see what will come of tonight. Maybe me going to the palace will answer my questions" he heard a kawkaw sound from behind him "Welcome back Talon" Steam said greeting his pet falcon. From the sound of it's landing he realized it was on his desk slightly to his left.
He reached his hoof out and patted the falcon's head. It nuzzled his hoof and then dropped a small metallic object on the desk.
"Is this for me?" asked Steam curiously hoofing over the device Talon let out a kawkaw and ruffled his feathers. Steam set it on the desk and pressed a small button on the side. A small click sounded and a voice came from the box.
"Dear Mr. Gear" the voice said "On behalf of our Princesses we do wish your presence at the Palace this evening before sunset. We do apologize for such an informal invitation but the situation is dire and we could find no other way to contact you. Your falcon was located and our message has hopefully been delivered. It is in this time of need we need brilliant ponies such as yourself to come to Equestria's aid once again."
"Alright I don't need to hear anymore" said Steam about to turn it off
"Noting your "condition" we have sent you an escort. She is to meet you outside your warehouse 30 minutes before sunset. Wishing you well, Shining Armor"
"Shining Armor?" said Steam picking up the device in his hoof and tossing it in the trash can "I remember that name" Indeed he did. He knew Shining armor all the way back from his days at Canterlot University. He had been a class ahead of him, but he had been his roommate for two years.
Talon kawkawed again bringing Steam back to the present. "If Shining is sending an escort," said Steam "There will be no hiding this time. He's not one to do half of a job" Steam trotted over to his workbench and picked up his saddlebag. He threw in some pencils, a dozen blueprints, and A bag of feed for Talon. He started fro the door but remembered something.
Turning around he took out a key from inside his jacket pocket and inserted into a bronze trimmed chest on the far side of the room. Inside there were three odd shaped metallic objects. He took them out and careful put each one into his saddlebag. He then took the goggles Vinyl had left on his desk and put them on his head. He felt a strange sensation doing this, it felt somewhat right.
Opening his door he walked on the catwalk till he reached twenty hoofsteps and then trotted down the stairs. He then wrapped his forehoof on the piece of metal to his right and waited for the echo to pass. He then picked his way through the room remembering where the differences in echo laid. Upon reaching the front door he took a long breath of air. It had been quite sometime since he'd left his warehouse.
He opened the door and felt the air rush in, a gentle breeze on Steam's face. He walked outside and found it to be a little cold. He felt an odd sensation on his fur. It felt as if he was being rained on with warmth. He could hear the small talk of ponies coming from farther down the street. Somepony stole an apple. Some other pony's hat doesn't fit. Steam sat down next to his door and raised his foreleg so that talon could rest his wings for a bit.
As he laid his head back against the stone wall. He heard hoofsteps coming towards him.
"Oh hello" said the Pony stopping and looking at him Steam didn't answer "Are you okay?" asked the pony taking a step closer
"I'm fine" replied Steam firmly
"Are you sure?" asked the pony in a gentle voice Steam heard a set of wings flutter, obviously this pony was a pegasus as well. Steam shuffled against the wall bringing his metal wings fully out of view "Do you need help getting some where?"
"No I'm just waiting for somepony" said Steam placing his free hoof behind his head
"It's just that I can see..." started the pony in an obviously feminine tone
"Yes you can see" said Steam harshly "That's wonderful for you. I may be blind but at least I don't try to make other ponies feel sorry for me. If I need help I'll ask somepony for it" Talon chose this moment to launch into the air. Seemingly escaping from the situation until it cools down.
"O-oh I see" said the pony beginning to retreat backwards "Well I guess I'll be going then"
"Hey Shy what's up?" asked a second voice more brash than the first one Steam hadn't noticed it coming when he was yelling at the pegasus.
"She was insinuating that I was helpless" said Steam nonchalantly
"N-no I didn't mean it like that" said Shy softly
"Hey just who do you think you are talking that way to my friend?" asked the other pony A pegasus Steam noticed by the ruffle of feathers.
"Who do you think I am?" asked Steam sarcastically "I don't even know who you are"
"My name is Rainbow Dash" said the second pegasus proudly "Fastest flier in all of Equestria. This here is my friend Fluttershy" Steam assumed that meant the other Pegasus
"Is that supposed to mean something to me?" asked Steam curiously as if he was looking for a medal of some kind "Do you have a badge?"
"Dashy" said Fluttershy putting her hoof on Rainbow's shoulder "Maybe we should just go?"
"Yes perhaps you should go and leave a stallion to rest" said Steam shifting to a more comfortable position
"What is wrong with you" asked Rainbow dumbfounded
"I'm blind" replied Steam with a chuckle "Or did you not notice?"
"I meant your head feather brain" said Rainbow taking a step closer
Steam looked to his left as he heard another pair of hoofsteps come closer. It was followed by a familiar scent. It smelled slightly of cinnamon.
"What's going on here" asked the new pony
"Spi-Spitfire?" said Rainbow jaw dropping "What are you doing here?"
"I could say the same for you Dash" replied Spitfire casually
"This feather brain was picking on my friend" accused Rainbow
"Feather brain huh?" said Spitfire with a laugh "This one?" Steam could only imagine the look on her face seeing him this way.
"Oh quiet Spits" replied Steam giving her the equivalent to a glare
"Spits?" mimicked Rainbow her jaw dropping "You know each other?"
"Yeah me and this feather brain go way back" said Spitfire trotting over to Steam and patting his head with a hoof "Although I don't remember him looking quite so grungy"
"Spits why are you here?" asked Steam batting away her hoof "It's been four years since we last met"
"Don't say it like that" said Spitfire in a fake hurt tone "After all you had a crush on me didn't you?"
"Spits!" yelled Steam standing up quickly his metal wings unfolding "You know that's not true!"
"Then why get so defensive all of a sudden?" asked Spitfire knowingly bopping him on the nose with her hoof "Also what's up with the new wings? I don't remember you having those"
"What the buck is that?" asked Rainbow noticing the metal wings as well They were sharp and definitely shaped to look like wings, but they seemed to be connected directly to his back there was no harness of any kind.
"They're called wings" said Steam angrily casting his gaze over all three of them "Do you have a problem with them?"
"Its just that they are um" said Fluttershy nervously
"Metal?" suggested Spitfire with a giggle
"Yeah" said Fluttershy "metal.."
"I am a pegasus after all" said Steam folding his wings back against his sides, locking them there with a click "Even a feather brain would know I need wings. Now can we drop the topic?"
"Sure but just who is this feather brain Spitfire" asked Rainbow
"This feather brain is non other than Steam Gear" replied Spitfire stepping in beside Steam wrapping her hoof around his shoulders
"The Steam Gear?!" asked Rainbow in shock "The same Steam Gear who made your wonder suits?"
"All I did was make them lightning proof" said Steam "I don't deserve all the credit"
"Yeah but that has saved my flank more times than I can count Steam" said Spitfire hugging Steam this admittedly made Steam feel a little weird. He could feel her mane on his face and smell that familiar cinnamon scent on her. He breathed in deeply getting a warm feeling in his chest.
"U-um Spitfire" asked Fluttershy shyly
"Hmm" replied Spitfire looking in her direction, doing so swept her mane out of Steam's face
"W-what are you doing here" asked Fluttershy lowering her gaze "If that's okay to ask"
"Oh I almost forgot" said Spitfire letting go of Steam "I have to take Steam to the palace before sundown for a meeting of some kind"
"No way" said Rainbow in disbelief "We have to go to the palace before sundown too"
"Seems like we're headed in the same direction" said Spitfire hitting Steam in the shoulder playfully "Though I suppose I should get Steam here cleaned up a bit before I take him to see the palace. He smells kind of funny"
"Now that you mention it he does smell kinda rank" said Rainbow placing a hoof over her nose
"You don't smell like sunshine either" grumbled Steam
"We'll meet you two later alright" said Spitfire pulling on Steam's jacket leading him away from the other two
"Alright Spitfire" said Rainbow wrapping her hoof around Fluttershy
"Goodbye" said Fluttershy waving goodbye
Spitfire and Steam walked in silence for what Steam assumed to be a couple blocks before she broke the silence.
"So how have you been Steam?" she asked
"I've been alright I guess" said Steam with a sigh
"Doesn't sound that way to me" replied Spitfire worry in her voice "Something on your mind?"
"Just thinking" answered Steam reassuringly
"You thinking" said Spitfire with a laugh "When aren't you thinking?" When Steam didn't say anything Spitfire lost her smile. "It must be pretty serious if it's bothering you this much"
"It's nothing really Spits" said Steam giving her a weak smile "Just thinking about some old friends"
Spitfire accepted that for now and stopped at their destination.
"Where are we exactly?" asked Steam curiously "The Wonderbolt headquarters?"
"Nah I brought us back to my house" replied Spitfire fumbling under the mat for her key Upon finding it she opened the door ushering Steam inside before coming in herself and closing the door. She walked over and sat down on what from the sound of springs squeaking Steam thought to be a couch.
"So Steam?" Spitfire asked coyly patting the cushion beside her "What is really on your mind?" |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 6 | Twilight stepped into her old bedroom and took a deep breath. She hadn't been here since she left for Ponyville with Spike. "Spike..." Twilight thought with a sigh Not too long ago she had witnessed him give his life for her. She could still see the pained smile on his face as he said "Welcome back" Twilight shook her head and closed the door to her room.
At first she thought the trip to Canterlot would be an escape, but she soon realized that Sigil was coming along. Sigil, a pony she had come to admire. He had magic that could rival Princess Celestia herself, but what did he use it for? He knew magic that Equestria could not even imagine. A particular spell which Twilight had suffered personally almost killed her and cost Spike his life.
Twilight trotted slowly over to her bed dragging her hooves along the floor. In her heart she knew that Sigil had done the only thing he could to save her, but in her mind she couldn't forgive what he sacrificed to do it. Spike was like her brother. Without him Twilight would never have been accepted as the Princess's private student, would have never been sent to Ponyville, never have met her friends.
Twilight laid backside down on her bed and stared at the ceiling. She closed her eyes as she remembered yesterday's events. After explaining her experience with Trixie in the Everfree, the Princess had left for Canterlot and asked us to meet her there in two days. Rainbow and Fluttershy left to go get train tickets for the next day, leaving Twilight and Sigil Flare alone in the Library.
At first there was an awkward silence. "Twilight don't scare me like that" said Sigil finally breaking the silence
"Don't scare you?" Twilight said upset mistaking his concern for scolding "Have you seen what you've done?" she pointed a hoof at Spike
"I know what I've done" said Sigil his ears drooping "You have every right to hate me"
"Why did you do it?" asked Twilight tears starting to form "Why?"
"Because I made a promise," said Sigil looking into Twilight's eyes "A promise that I wouldn't let anypony I care about get hurt"
"Anypony?" yelled Twilight her emotions coming to the surface clouding her thoughts "Is that why you let him do it? Because he wasn't a pony?"
"No.." said Sigil defensively raising a hoof to shield himself if she decided to strike him
"Spike was more of a pony than you''ll ever be Sigil!" yelled Twilight shutting eyes against her tears
"Twilight..." said Sigil in a shocked voice backing away from her
"I don't want to hear anything more" cried Twilight through her tears "Get out of my house!"
Sigil gave a deep sigh and gathered his courage walking past the crying Twilight. He stopped at the door and without turning around said in a voice that froze Twilight to her core "Twilight..."
Twilight turned and looked at him. His back was turned to her but his shoulders were firm and his voice steady.
"I will keep my promise Twilight." said Sigil with a wisdom that scared Twilight "There are many ways to live this life we are given. You can live it alone. With no friends, no family, no one to wake up to in the morning. Always wondering where your next meal will come from and with everypony shunning you and looking down on you. This is the life I lived before I came here"
"Sigil..." murmured Twilight her tears slowing
"This is not a life I chose" continued Sigil putting more effort into his words holding back his own tears "It was a life I was given. When I came here to your world I thought I could change that. I thought I could finally have friends, have someone to talk to that would try to kill me in the morning"
"What are you trying to say?" asked Twilight trying to understand her emotions turning to rage
"I can see now that I was wrong" said Sigil all of his pain over the years loaded in his voice "No matter where I go, I will always be hated and exiled." He turned and looked into Twilight's eyes Twilight had never seen so much pain in her entire life. It hurt too much, Twilight had to look away from his gaze. "But that doesn't matter to me anymore. I don't care if I am hated and looked down upon. I will shoulder the load if its what it takes to protect those I care about."
As Sigil turned and opened the door he waited for one second before saying a voice just loud enough for Twilight to hear "Especially the one I love" With those final words he walked out the door and was gone, leaving Twilight alone with her griefs. Twilight pulled herself together just long enough to bury Spikes body properly. With that done she closed the door to the Library and walked upstairs.
As soon as her bed was in sight she broke down and ran crying to her bed diving into it and covered her head in her pillow, muffling her sobs. Twilight began to cry as she laid in her room. In the last two days she lost two of the most important things in her life. She lost her number one assistant and brother Spike and she also lost Sigil, a pony which she had been developing strange feelings for over the last couple of days, her best friend.
Twilight was startled by a knock on her door. She took a pillow and threw it at the door and yelled "Go away!" The pillow bounced off the door and hit the floor, only to be pushed out of the way as the door swung open. Princess Celestia stepped into the room and looked at her student with a warm expression.
"Princess..." said Twilight immediately regretting her previous action "I"
"It's alright" said Celestia raising a hoof to silence the crying unicorn "I understand" She walked over to her student the door swinging shut behind her. Celestia sat down in front of Twilight meeting her eyes for a moment. Through the tears she could see pain and regret.
"Why are you here Princess?" asked Twilight trying to look for something "I don't have a letter for you"
The Princess reached out a hoof and turned Twilight's head back to face her. "Twilight I'm not here for a letter. I'm here because your brother asked me to come check up on you"
"Why would he do that?" asked Twilight sniffling
"Because" said the Princess using her hoof to wipe the tears out of Twilight's eyes "He told me that he had never seen my student with such a look of grief on her face. Shining told me he would rather fight a swarm of Manticores than see you like this"
"Really?" asked Twilight with a blush "He said that?"
"Yes he did" replied Celestia softly "Now what's wrong my little pony?"
"I don't know" said Twilight her head spinning "I'm so confused. Every time I try to think of an answer I can't come up with anything. My heart wants what my mind says it can't have. I've never read this in any books in my Library.
"Twilight you are my most gifted student" said Princess Celestia reassuringly "But sometimes you think to much. There are somethings you can't learn through books. If your believe it to be true in your heart, than you don't need to think about it. You already have your answer"
Twilight's jaw dropped as the truth behind the Princess's words sunk in. The world around her began to melt away as the answer hit her. In her heart she wanted more than anything to have Sigil back. A warmth flooded through Twilight as she rushed forward and embraced her mentor in an embrace. The princess just smiled and wrapped her hooves around Twilight.
"Thank you" whispered Twilight into Celestia's fur
"No problem" answered the Princess softly
Sigil dragged his hooves as he trudged along the road. He couldn't get her out of his head. Every time he closed his eyes he could see Twilight's face, tears streaming down her cheeks. "She hates me" thought Sigil "My first and closest friend and .... she hates me" Sigil's ears drooped as he sighed
He had been walking for a day and a half now. He had been forced to build a makeshift shelter last night. Sigil still had leaves sticking all over his fur from sleeping on the ground. Sigil took the map of Equestria he bought before he left Ponyville out of his saddle bag. Looking at it he guessed he had another half a days trot until he hit Canterlot.
Sigil's hooves hurt with every step. He had been pushing himself to the limit the entire way. He was going to keep his promise. "Even if he I can't be with Twilight" said Sigil to himself picking up his pace "It doesn't mean I can't watch over her" He cantered on for about a half an hour before he had to take a short break to rest his tired hooves.
Sigil laid down in the cool grass, the sun burning itself into his fur. His ears twitched as he heard a bird give an alarm call in the distance. He sat up and perched himself on his front hooves.
"Halt" said a voice in his mind "Come no further"
"Who is this?" asked Sigil out loud he got no reply "I am just a wary traveler" Sigil continued
"I know who you are other worlder" said the voice echoing in his mind "You thoughts are made known to me"
"If you know who I am then why do you stop me?" asked Sigil out loud "Show yourself. At least give me a face to talk to" Sigil stood up on all four hooves as a silver furred wolf at nearly twice his size stalked out of the bushes. He remembered talk of wolves near this road with his talks with fellow travelers, but they never said anything about telepathy.
"I show you my face Lloyd" said the wolf in his mind "I tell you once more, leave"
"I cannot and you know it" said Sigil firmly "I have a promise to keep"
"As do I" replied the wolf "I have been asked to keep you away from Twilight"
"Who would ask you to do that?" asked Sigil curiously
"That is no concern of yours" said the wolf crouching as if to pounce on Sigil
"I would like to know who asked you to do this wolf" yelled Sigil angrily
"Fluttershy asked me to do this" replied the wolf "and my name is Kurt not wolf"
"Kurt?" asked Sigil his eyes widening "Kurt Wolfe?"
"Ironic seeing as I'm a wolf I bet?" said the wolf in his head with a laugh "You've heard tales of me then?"
"I have" replied Sigil swallowing the lump in his throat "I've heard you are a sword for hire, who will do anything for gold. You don't care what the job is or how many people you have to kill to get it done."
"Seems someone has done their research" said Kurt with a toothy smile
"What is a monster like you doing in Equestria?" asked Sigil stamping his hoof "How many ponies have you murdered already"
"I am offended Lloyd" said Kurt mockingly sitting down putting a paw over his chest defensively "To think a mage believes that I am a monster"
"I may be a mage" said Sigil angrily glaring at Kurt "but at least I have a heart!"
"Oh you have pained me" mocked Kurt again "A job is a job mage. I just have a very dirty one"
"Is that how you justify killing people?" asked Sigil mouth agape
"Honestly I don't particularly enjoy killing people" said Kurt with a yawn "To tell you the truth I kind of tired of it. But if word gets out that a mercenary has gone soft it becomes difficult to get any of the high paying jobs"
"Is all you care about money then?" asked Sigil wondering now if he could talk his way past Kurt
"Not really" replied Kurt "It's just something to pass the time"
"Your sick" said Sigil
"Perhaps I am?" answered Kurt with an inquisitive look "What do you plan to do about it?"
"I plan on killing you" replied Sigil pointing his hoof at Kurt "and then I'm going to find Twilight and make sure she's still alive"
"You kill me don't make me laugh" said the wolf flexing his claws into the soft earth under his paws "you haven't the skill or the energy"
"Maybe your right" replied Sigil his horn glowing "I haven't the energy" The earth under Kurt's feet began to rumble. "But I do have the skill!" yelled Sigil as the earth under Kurt's feet erupted into a spike. Kurt leaped backwards and landed on all four paws as another spire shot up underneath him. Kurt jumped higher this time and dug his claws into the trunk of a tree.
Sigil stamped his hoof and a boulder shot out of the ground in Kurt's direction. Kurt dropped off as the boulder hit the tree tearing a hole through it.
"Well the mage has a few magic tricks" Kurt sneered "but play time is over" He broke into a sprint running to fast for Sigil to follow with his eyes. Sigil gathered magic into his hooves raising them up. He lit them on fire with a glow of his horn and crashed them to the ground. A shock wave was sent out around Sigil with an explosion of flame. It caught Kurt mid jump knocking him backwards through the air into a tree. As Kurt fell to the ground, Sigil laughed panting.
"I thought you said play time was over?" asked Sigil
"It was" said Kurt dusting the soot off of his fur, restoring his silvery shine "that is until you decided to use a cheap shot"
"All I did was a magic trick" said Sigil acting innocent
"Good to see you have a sense of humor" said Kurt appearing in front of Sigil in the blink of an eye Kurt rammed his paw into Sigil's stomach lifting him off his hooves and catapulting him backwards. He hit the ground with a heavy thump and skidded in the dirt to a halt.
"It helps make this more fun" grunted Sigil getting back to his hooves, sucking in a breath of air
"You know your not that bad" said Kurt thinking "Maybe I won't kill you"
"Then let me pass" yelled Sigil "I must keep my promise. I won't let anything stand in my way"
"Are you sure?" asked Kurt seriously "Is she worth that much to you?"
"I would rather die than to give up now" said Sigil "I must see her again"
"Then take it back" said Kurt calmly all hostility gone
"Take what back?" asked Sigil confused
"Calling me a monster" replied Kurt simply
"That's it?" said Sigil deadpanning
"Yup" said Kurt with a toothy smile
"In that case I take it back" said Sigil taking a step towards Kurt "Can I pass now?"
"Of course" said Kurt with a laugh "I'll even come with you"
"What?" asked Sigil in disbelief "Why?"
"Well to tell you the truth" said Kurt in explanation "I never promised Fluttershy to keep you away. All I wanted to do was confirm for myself that you really do care for her"
"So it was just a test?" asked Sigil face hoofing
"Yes it was" replied Kurt setting out at a brisk pace gesturing Sigil to follow him "and you pass with high marks"
"Are you really Kurt Wolfe?" asked Sigil curiously looking at the wolf beside him
"I sure am" answered Kurt with a laugh "Remember what I said about the whole reputation thing. Let's just say some of it was exaggerated."
"So you don't actually kill people?" asked Sigil stepping over an overgrown root in his path
"No I still kill people" said Kurt "but on my terms and honorably. I do not kill those who do not deserve to die"
"How can you tell?" asked Sigil
"I can read minds remember" said Kurt in Sigil's head "I know who deserves it"
"What about that town you burned down?" asked Sigil
"The town was empty" replied Kurt with a laugh "Some bandits had run them out 2 days prior to my arrival"
"Really?" said Sigil wondering if all the stories he'd heard about this blood thirsty killer were fake
"I actually hunted down the bandits and took back what they stole from the villagers and gave it back to them" continued Kurt "they were very happy to see it believe me"
"What happened to all the seriousness and talk about killing me?" asked Sigil
"Well I can't go around killing all my friends" replied Kurt punching Sigil in the shoulder playfully "If I did that who would by me a drink?"
"You sure do have an odd way of making friends Kurt" said Sigil glad to not have to fight this wolf anymore
"I guess I do" said Kurt with a smile "but while we're in Equestria it's Silver Streak alright?"
"Alright Silver" said Sigil nodding agreement "Let's hurry on to Canterlot"
Silver slowed down and stopped just inside the forest line. Sigil noticed this and stopped too .
"What's up?" asked Sigil
"I can't go with you beyond this point" said Silver
"Why not?" asked Sigil not understanding
"Think about it" said Silver "I'm a wolf. What do you think would happen if I walk into a town full of ponies?"
"Good point" said Sigil with a laugh "maybe I can help with that"
"What can you do?" asked Silver "You can't turn me into a pony"
"No" Sigil admitted "but I am pretty gifted with illusion magic. I can make it so when ponies look at you they see you as a pony"
"Really?" asked Silver excited
"Hold still" said Sigil igniting his horn He began waving his hooves weaving magic around Silver. When Sigil finished he was no longer staring at a wolf he was starring at a silver furred stallion with gray hair and a sword for a cutie mark. "All set"
"You sure it works?" asked Silver looking at himself "I don't feel any different"
"Trust me" said Sigil "unless you are usually a silver stallion, its working"
"Thanks" said Kurt high hoofing Sigil
"No problem" said Sigil "Let's go find Twilight" |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 7 | "I told you I'm fine" replied Steam waving a hoof
"You are many things Steam" replied Spitfire with a smile "But a good liar is not one of them. I can practically hear the gears in your mind screaming"
"Your exaggerating" said Steam trying to change the subject "Why did you bring me here anyways?"
"I brought you here originally to clean you up" said Spitfire with a shake of her head "but I can see now that your mind needs some cleaning out too"
"My mind is fine" said Steam "i don't need your help"
"Now is not the time to be turning away help Steam" replied Spitfire "You of all ponies should know by now that sometimes you can't do it alone."
"Why do you care anyways?" asked Steam trying to make her the bad pony
"Because I'm your friend Steam" replied Spitfire warmly "I want to help you"
"If you wanted to help so much then where were you 4 years ago?" yelled Steam wanting to hear anything but the truth
Spitfire's ears drooped as she replied "You know where I was 4 years ago Steam" She looked straight at him as she added "I was trying out for the Wonderbolts in Filydelphia"
"Why didn't you come and look for me once you heard the news?" asked Steam still drilling her for info "I'm sure Shining told you"
"I got a letter 2 weeks after the incident" answered Spitfire opening a drawer and pulling out a tattered piece of paper "It said you had been injured in a warehouse fire and then disappeared from the hospital. That's all I got, I tried to come and look but if I had then I would have been kicked out of the Wonderbolts. I would have missed too many practices in my absence"
"So you stayed and lived your dreams and left me to rot alone?" Steam said sitting up and looking in her direction "yet you still call yourself my friend?"
"Hey!" yelled a voice from the other room "Stop yelling at her!" A large Stallion came in from the other room. Steam hadn't noticed him in his conversation with Spitfire. As Steam heard wings flap, a hoof was driven into his chest sending him tumbling backwards. Steam did a back flip and regained his balance on his hooves standing up.
"Soarin!" said Spitfire shocked "When did you come in?"
"Right on time" replied Soarin gearing up for another punch "Just who is this pony and how hard do you want me to beat him?"
"If you may" said Steam reaching into his saddle bag "let me get ready first. I am blind you know" Taking one of the wrapped parcels out of his saddlebag and unwrapped it with a swing of his hoof. It resembled a large brass colored metal rod interchanging with two silver rods and a half moon. Steam took it and banged it on the floor once and it unfolded itself into a rather grisly looking scythe.
"Now," said Steam gripping the scythe's shaft in his mouth and getting into what can only be described as a hunter's crouch "I'm ready"
"Steam stop it" yelled Spitfire throwing herself between Steam and Soarin
"Steam?" asked Soaring confused grabbing Spitfire in his hooves and flying quickly out of range of Steam's scythe "Your Steam Gear?"
"What if I am?" asked Steam through the scythe "What is it to you?"
"I just came here because I heard our Captain had quit so I wanted to make sure she was okay" said Soarin explaining "But now that you are here I can see why she quit"
"What are you talking about?" asked Steam suspicion creeping into his voice "Spits what's going on?"
"I quit the Wonderbolts" Spitfire said slowly forcing the words out she hid her face behind Soarin
"Why the hay would you do that?" asked Steam confused "I thought being a Wonderbolt was your dream?"
"It was my dream" replied Spitfire still hidden behind Soarin "but now I have a new dream"
"What are you talking about?" asked Steam bringing the scythe up to point menacingly at Soarin's throat "Did you do something to her?"
"I haven't done anything" replied Soarin defensively swallowing the lump in his throat "You are the one that made her quit."
"What?" asked Steam the scythe falling from his mouth as it swung open in shock
"For the last couple years she's been with the Wonderbolts Spitfire has been disappearing for a few days whenever we come to a new town. She always shows up for practice but then poof she's gone" said Soarin "We asked where she had been and she always replied looking for an old friend"
Steam's mind shattered. It felt as if a hole had punched through his chest. Here he was again scorning his own friends just because he was feeling sorry for himself, because he had believed himself to be alone for so long. In truth he was only alone because he decided to be. Steam couldn't be with other ponies for fear of what they would do to him in the end. He couldn't have his heart broken again.
"When Shining told me that he had found you I was so happy" said Spitfire finally coming out from behind Soarin "After all the years of searching I had finally found you again"
"Spits..." mumbled Steam his mind swirling with his new revelation
"She has been looking for the whole time dude" said Soarin
Spitfire trotted slowly over to the dazed Steam and sat directly in front of him. "I have wanted to do this for so long" Then she leaned in and kissed Steam on the lips
Steam's mind instantly cleared as he felt the tenderness in that single kiss. For a moment he could have sworn he saw Spitfire sitting in front of him the sunlight shimmering on her golden coat. It was at this moment he realized how he felt for Spitfire. She was not only his friend but, maybe she was something more as well.
"Well it looks like I can go now" said Soarin letting himself out "I'll tell the team that you want a extended vacation. There will always be a spot on the team for you captain!" with that he shut the door behind him leaving Steam and Spitfire alone.
"Spits... I...." started Steam not knowing what to say
"It's okay Steam" said Spitfire a tad of sorrow in her voice "I didn't expect you to kiss me back"
She began to stand up, but was stopped by a hoof on her cheek.
"Spitfire..." said Steam pulling her head down towards his again "You should always expect the unexpected" With that he kissed her. He put all the feeling he could into it trying to make it last as long as he could. Reluctantly he had to pull back for air.
"I'm sorry" said Steam lowering his sightless gaze to the floor "I am such a fool"
"Steam you have nothing to be sorry for" soothed Spitfire lifting up his head with her hoof "I love you. You are no fool"
"Why do you say that?" asked Steam absently "look at me"
"I am looking at you Steam, but it is not for that reason you are not a fool." said Spitfire pulling her hoof back taking a deep breath "It is because of what you said to me all those years ago, something that has driven me to this day."
"I was lost and thought the very thought of me ever joining the Wonderbolts was hopeless. I was ready to give up altogether." said Spitfire in a very quiet voice closing her eyes remembering how she felt that day "In fact I was on my way to drop out of Canterlot University when I bumped into a rather goofy stallion. As I apologized and offered to help him pick up his scattered books he just put a hoof on my shoulder and smiled at me. He asked me what was wrong. It was as if he could read my mind."
"Spits..." was all Steam could say before Spitfire continued
"Somehow I felt like I could trust this stallion he made me feel like everything was alright. As if being around him could make your darkest fears just go away. When I told him my problems he laughed at me." said Spitfire with a chuckle tears beginning to form in the corners of her eyes "He told me that it wouldn't do me any good to run away from my dreams. I asked him what made him so sure. I believe you know what he told me Steam."
Steam closed his eyes and repeated from his memory "Your only giving up because you have lost your sight. Without sight we lose hope. Without hope we eventually fall into darkness. This is were you are right now in the darkness unsure of yourself. Let me be the one to light your path. The truth is that a light shines brightest in the darkness, and there is nothing, no force in all of Equestria, that can stop the will of a determined soul. If you can gain the courage to overcome the obstacles in your path then there is nothing holding you from your dreams. Trust me"
"That stallion was you Steam" said Spitfire opening her eyes tears flowing freely "I never told you how much that meant to me. You acted as if it never happened just patted me on the head and gave me the goofiest smile I had ever seen and trotted off." She had to pause to wipe the tears from her eyes before she could continue "but that didn't stop you from helping me follow my dreams. It seemed from then on I would always bump into you and you would say something to lift my spirits and push me onward. Without you Steam I never would have had the courage to even try out for the Wonderbolts much less become Captain. I owe you my life Steam"
"Spitfire..." said Steam in a mere whisper He could hear her crying. Her tears spattering as they hit the floor. He saw a flash of light as if in a dream. There stood Spitfire in front of him her eyes streaked with tears staring at him. A ray of sunlight hit her coat igniting it in golden twirls of flame. Her wings partially unfolded to her sides. She looked like a weeping angel.
"On that day you gave me my life back Steam. You pulled me out of the darkness" said Spitfire rubbing her eyes erasing her tears and scooting closer to Steam "You are just as lost as I was that day. Let me be your light now when you need me most Steam. Find hope in me and take a step out of the darkness and into the light." With that Spitfire caught Steam in a loving embrace.
Steam returned it without a second thought. It was almost as if he could feel all the pain and loneliness just wash away as a new feeling rose within him. One he hadn't felt in a long time. Tears began to wet his bandage as he wept. "Thank you" he sobbed into Spitfires mane "Thank you"
Spitfire only smiled and said "Welcome back" She let Steam cry until he tired out then she softened her embrace and let him pull back. "Feel better?" asked Spitfire giving Steam a soft bop on the nose with her hoof
Steam replied simply by kissing her deeply which she greatly enjoyed.
"I'll take that as a yes" Spitfire laughed
"Spitfire..." said Steam pulling a deep breath "I love you"
"I know" said Spitfire patting him on the head His hair felt grungy and stained with oil. "but you are very dirty and your bandages are soaked through. We'll have to clean you up before I take you to the palace tonight"
"Haven't really had the chance to shower lately you know?" said Steam with a chuckle "Sorry"
"No it's no big deal" said Spitfire thinking mischievously "We'll just have to give you a bath"
"What did you just say?" asked Steam confused
"I said "we" you can't find your away around my house without your sight" said Spitfire pulling him in the direction of her tub "besides I want to wash your back for you"
"Alright.." said Steam still unsure he should be doing this Spitfire lead him through what smelled like the kitchen, down the hall and into a nice smelling room. He sat down and turned his head as Spitfire walked over and turned on the faucet to draw the water.
"I'm going to need you to get in Steam" said Spitfire with a giggle waving him over to the tub
tapping the side of it with her hoof to give him a good idea where it is
Steam blushed a bit as he made his way slowly to the tub. He unslung his saddle bag from his shoulder and laid it against the wall. He then took off his jacket. Spitfire took it from him and hung it up on the wall. "You didn't need to do that" said Steam
"It was no problem Steam" said Spitfire cutely "Feel free to step on in the water is fine" She flicked the tip of his nose with her tail. Steam followed her tail up over the edge of the tub. He placed his hoof into the water finding it warm to the touch. He quickly placed all four of his hooves in the soothing water and sat down.
"This feels great" Steam sighed
"You needed this more than I thought" Spitfire said placing a hoof on his shoulder "You are so tense and worked up. Do you want me to give you a massage?"
"Could you?" asked Steam with a smile
"Of course Steam" said Spitfire stepping into the tub in front of him "I'd love to join you. That is if you don't mind?"
"I'd love for you to join me" replied Steam with a frown "I just wish I could see..." He didn't get to finish, Spitfire stole his breath with a kiss. She pulled back and said
"Don't finish that sentence" She nuzzled him before she said "Sight can fade Steam" she put a hoof on his chest "But feelings never do"
"You always know what to say" replied Steam hugging Spitfire nuzzling her
"Alright Steam" said Spitfire grabbing the shower head in her hoof "Time to wash you up" With that she sprayed him on top of his head. The water ran down his head and into his face.
"Augh" said Steam spitting some water out of his mouth "Spitfire you could warn me first"
"Sorry" apologized Spitfire with a small chuckle giving him a peck on his forehead "Here comes another one then" She sprayed water over his head again and ran her hooves through his hair , letting the shower head drop. "Is that better?"
"Almost" Steam replied grabbing the fallen shower head he sprayed Spitfire over the head. She squealed in delight "Now we're even"
"That wasn't fair" protested Spitfire playfully bopping Steam on the nose
"I know" replied Steam nuzzling her "I'm sorry"
"What am I going to do with you?" asked Spitfire nuzzling him back
"Well you did promise me a massage" answered Steam with a smile
"Alright" said Spitfire sweetly "I'll need you to turn around then" Steam turned around so his back was facing Spitfire. She looked at his rust colored mane as it cascaded down the back of his neck and smiled. Her smile faulted when she glanced at his brass colored wings. "These wings of yours how did you get them?"
"I built them three years ago" replied Steam spreading his wings out and ruffling them a bit "I'm a pegasus. I need wings to fly."
"But it is so unnatural" said Spitfire tapping one wing with her hoof
"Once a pegasus always a pegasus Spitfire. Flying is in our blood." explained Steam folding his wings back up "Imagine if you lost your ability to fly?"
"I don't want to imagine that Steam" said Spitfire with a sigh "Flying is in my blood"
"I'm sorry if they bother you" said Steam attempting to stand up Spitfire reached out a hoof onto his back right between his wings stopping him.
"No it's fine" said Spitfire with a weak smile "I'll just have to get used to them is all. I would never take anything away from you" With that she moved her hooves to Steam's shoulders and began her massage. "I want you to be happy" Her hooves worked themselves into the thick mouscles in Steams shoulders kneading them firmly.
Steam let out a relaxed sigh as he felt the massage start. He closed his eyes and let Spitfire's hooves work they're magic. He felt her hooves work down his back and move in circular motions around his wings. Steam felt the knots in his muscles tighten and then unwind. When Spitfire was done she patted his back softly.
"All done" she said stepping out of the tub
"Already" said Steam stepping out of the tub after her shaking his wet mane splashing her with water
"Take a towel" said Spitfire giggling pulling a towel out of a cabinet and handing it to him
"If you insist" replied Steam "Does that mean we have to go to the palace now"
"As much as I would love to spend the rest of the night with you Steam" said Spitfire with a sigh "I did promise Shining Armor you would be there"
"Alright" said Steam putting his jacket back on and throwing his saddle bag over his shoulder "but I'm not sure I can get to the palace myself"
"Don't worry Steam I'll be your eyes" said Spitfire nuzzling him "I won't leave your side" |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 8 | "Calm down Dashy" said Fluttershy giving her marefriend an affectionate nuzzle
"It's almost time for the Princess to set the sun" whined Rainbow accepting the nuzzle from Fluttershy a little of her annoyance fading. They had been waiting in the palace throne room for quite some time now. "Where is everypony else?"
"Don't you remember Dashy?" asked Fluttershy hugging her marefriend and giving her a peck on the check "We came here early so we could spend sometime together"
"Oh yeah" replied Rainbow returning the hug blushing a bit "who would have thought I'd every be early?"
"That makes two of us" answers Twilight Sparkle entering the room from a doorway to the left of the throne
"Twilight.." said Fluttershy letting go of Rainbow a blush on her face "So nice of you to join us"
"Where the hay have you been?" asked Rainbow pointing a hoof in Twilight's direction accusingly
"I'm sorry Rainbow Dash" answered Princess Celestia walking into view from behind her throne "Twilight has speaking with me. I hope that's okay with you?"
"Of course Princess" replied Rainbow immediately much to Twilight's amusement Rainbow shot Twilight a dirty look.
"You seem impatient as usual Rainbow" said Twilight getting over her giggles
"It's just we've been waiting for you to show up for quite some time" said Fluttershy quietly "and we were wondering what we are here for"
"I'm sorry Fluttershy but you have to wait for the others to arrive" said Princess Celestia
"Probably a good thing I decided to show up then huh?" asked a white unicorn with purple shades walking in from the left. She had spiky blue hair and a pair of headphones around her neck
"Who are you supposed to be?" asked Rainbow loudly walking up to the mare
"Ah Vinyl Scratch how nice of you to make it" said Princess Celestia
"Vinyl Scratch?" asked Rainbow smirking
"Says the rainbow colored freak standing in front of me" replied Vinyl with a coy smile
"Who do you think you are?" yelled Rainbow losing her cool
"Only the best dj in all of Equestria" replied Vinyl tapping her headphones with a hoof
"If your so good then why have I never heard of you" asked Rainbow defiantly
"Probably because your head is always in the clouds" replied Vinyl starting to laugh
"Why you..." said Rainbow gritting her teeth She pulled a hoof back and sent it flying straight towards Vinyl's face. Vinyl ducked Rainbow's punch and backed away.
"Wow Color-Stream" said Vinyl coldly "You sure you want to do this?"
"Stop acting so cool" yelled Rainbow leaping at Vinyl "It's pissing me off"
"Alright have it your way" replied Vinyl dodging Rainbow's assault
Rainbow was on the offensive from the beginning throwing punch after punch. Vinyl kept on her hooves and dodged all she could having to block a few. Rainbow pivoted on her hooves and feigned a low jab. Vinyl took the bait. Rainbow instantly pooped back up and threw her other hoof in a sideswipe catching Vinyl in the side of the head.
Vinyl stayed standing but her glasses fell to the floor. She shook her head and looked back up at Rainbow. "Her eyes" thought Rainbow in shock "Their red!"
"Now look at what you've gone and done" said Vinyl angrily her horn glowing "Better watch your step Color-Stream. You might drop your bass!" with that Vinyl reared up on her hind hooves and slammed the ground. Everyponies ears in the room, even Princess Celestia's rang, as a wave of bass echoed out from Vinyl's epicenter. The force of it knocked Rainbow hurtling back through the air. Fluttershy flew up and caught her marefriend before she hit the wall.
"That wasn't fair" said Rainbow standing back up checking to make sure she could still hear
"Neither was your's" replied Vinyl levitating her glasses back into place
"What are you talking about" said Rainbow attempting to walk back towards Vinyl
A ash gray mare with an amazingly straight coal black mane walked in from behind Vinyl. She looked in Vinyl's direction caught the fading smile on the unicorn's face and sighed. Rainbow didn't notice the new pony till it was too late. She felt a hoof grip her throat as she was raised off her hooves and into the air. She stared into her new adversaries eyes and saw nothing but seriousness in the violet pools.
"Listen to me miss." said the ash earth pony in a deadly tone "If you hurt my friend in any way I will break you" The mare shot a hoof out and punched a hole in the wall to her left. "Understand"
Rainbow just gulped. The ash mare let her down slowly then trotted over to Vinyl's side and hit her over the head.
"Ow what did you do that for Tavi?" whined the Dj
"I swear every time I take my eyes off of you you wander into some kind of trouble" said Tavi in an annoyed tone It was at this moment she turned to look at the rest of the ponies in the room and her eyes fell on Princess Celestia. She immediately straightened up and said "Princess Celestia I am so sorry for everything Vinyl caused"
"It's quite alright Octavia" said Princess Celestia chuckling "I've always wanted a door there anyways."
"See Tavi everything is cool" said Vinyl throwing a hoof around Octavia's neck "Relax"
"You keep saying that" replied Octavia looking at her marefriend
"So Vinyl Scratch, Octavia" said Princess Celestia addressing them "Where is your friend, did you find him?"
"We found him your highness" replied Octavia looking down at her hooves "but he was different"
"How so" asked Twilight curiously
"He used to be my brother" replied Vinyl "he looked over me and protected me. I would do the same for him" Tears began to form in her eyes and she rubbed them away "That's was not my brother. It was like talking to a ghost"
Princess Celestia closed her eyes and nodded "You know Vinyl, sometimes we lose sight on what is important in our lives." Vinyl looked up at the princess not understanding "It is at these times we fall into the dark. Sometimes in extreme cases the pain is too great and we don't want back out"
"So what your trying to say is that he is lost forever" screamed Vinyl tears streaming down her face "I refuse to believe that Steam would ever want to forget about his friends, I know him."
"Vinyl..."said Octavia gently trying to comfort Vinyl who fell into her hooves crying into her shoulder
"Sometimes when your lost in the dark you can't see what's in front of you" said a golden pegasus with flaming hair
"Spitfire..." asked Rainbow confused
"and it is during these times you do things you don't mean too" replied a brown pegasus with rust colored hair. He had on a tan aviator's jacket and a bandage was covering his eyes. His hair was a rusty orange and he had metal wings.
"Steam..?" asked Octavia pulling Vinyl's head up to see
"Things that make us seem like horrible ponies. With light comes clarity and understanding. I can see now that you have tried to help me and I returned your kindness with hostility." continued Steam stopping next to Spitfire
"Brother? Is that you?" asked Vinyl trying to look through her tears
"I would like to apologize for what I've said" said Steam remorsefully "I hope you can..." he got no further before he was tackled to the ground a pair of hooves wrapped around his neck
"Don't you ever do that again" cried Vinyl into his chest angrily
"Don't worry little sis" said Steam returning the hug "I have an angel watching over me this time" He turned his sightless gaze in Spitfires direction
"Steam I'm glad your back" said Octavia helping him to his hooves dragging Vinyl along with him "You've been missed more than you know"
"It's good to be back Octy" replied Steam with a regretful smile "Though I feel terrible for the way I've acted"
"It's not your fault Steam" said Spitfire putting a hoof on his shoulder "The dark is a strange place. It makes us do terrible things"
"Steam Gear it is good to see you out and about once again old friend" said Princess Celestia
"I'm not that old" replied Steam with a laugh "but I must say It's good to hear your voice again your highness"
"Wait Steam Gear..." said Rainbow "How do all of you know this featherbrain?"
"Dashy..." shushed Fluttershy cautiously
"Oh you must be the two mares I met outside my warehouse today" said Steam sniffing "I'm sorry for the trouble I caused you. Wasn't really myself you know?"
"If you say so..." replied Rainbow unconvinced
"Now we're only missing one member of our group" said a silver haired stallion walking in beside Princess Celestia's
"Shining? Is that you?" asked Steam his ears twitching
"Well if it isn't my old roomy" said Shining with a laugh "Come to get me to do your homework again have you?"
"Not today roomy" said Steam with a smile "I should thank you for sending an angel my way in my hour of need."
"No thanks necessary old friend" replied Shining holding up a hoof "Call it repaying an old debt I owed. Besides Spitfire wanted to see you so badly"
"Shut up Shiny" said Spitfire blushing a bit
"Only you Spits would call me Shiny" sighed Shining shaking his head
"You said we are missing another member?" asked Twilight her eyes scanning the room "Who do you mean?"
"Why Sigil Flare of course" replied Shining "You've talked about him so much I thought I'd get to met him. When is he arriving Twilly?"
"Oh about that..." replied Twilight looking down at her hooves "I don't think he's coming"
"Why not you sounded so excited to bring him in your last letter?" asked Shining concerned
"Did something happen?"
"We had a fight" answered Twilight averting her eyes from her brother and her friends
"I see" answered Shining nodding "Well that's too bad"
"I think with that we can begin our meeting don't you?" asked Princess Celestia hinting to change the subject
"I agree old friend" said Steam nudging Spitfire "Let the meeting begin"
"A week ago my sister Luna went on a diplomatic mission to our southern border" said Celestia waving in a group of guards carrying a covered up frame. "She was abducted two days ago from her quarters. The only evidence left was this symbol carved into her wall."
The guards withdrew the sheet from the frame revealing a strange symbol. It looked like a full moon with a unicorn's head in it.
"It can't be..." murmured Octavia "It just can't"
"I'd thought we had seen the last of those bastards" growled Vinyl angrily
"What is it?" asked Steam concerned
"It's the symbol of the Nightmare's Steam" said Spitfire giving him a worried look
"I was afraid of that" said Steam with a sigh
"So you know this mark?" asked Princess Celestia
"Oh we know it" yelled Vinyl her voice laced with venom "It has caused us nothing but grief"
"What Vinyl means to say is that we recognize this symbol" explained Octavia taking a deep breath "It's the symbol of a cult called the Nightmare's. The very same one Princess that was behind the event four years ago at Canterlot University"
"I see" said Celestia nodding "It must be bringing back some unpleasant memories for you four then"
"It's not a very pleasant topic no" replied Steam with a frown "But tell me old friend why did you show us this?"
"Because old friend I need you to go after these kidnappers and get my sister back" replied Princess Celestia
"No!" yelled Vinyl furiously "I don't care if you are the Princess! I am NEVER going back there!"
"Vinyl calm down" said Octavia hugging the Dj
"I know it is a lot to ask after all these years but we don't have a choice" said Princess Celestia with a sigh
"Shining surely you could do something?" asked Twilight hopefully
"Sadly Twilly the Princess is correct" said Shining regretfully "It doesn't matter how many soldiers we send after them. Not a single one has made it past the border and returned"
"I couldn't ask more ponies to risk their lives for the sake of my sister when they stand no chance" said Princess Celestia "That's why we need you old friend. You have been there"
"And look at what it has done to him!" yelled Vinyl "How could you possibly ask him to do anymore to save Equestria after what he has already had to go through?!"
"Scratch calm yourself" said Steam with a smile he looked at the Princess "Old friend I would be honored to help Equestria in it's time of need"
"Brother..." said Vinyl confused tears seen streaming down behind her shades
"It's alright Sis" said Steam "I'm not asking you to come with me"
"We're not letting you go Steam" said Octavia sternly "Not after we just found you again"
"I'm coming with you" said Spitfire nuzzling him
"Thank you angel" whispered Steam nuzzling her back
"If Spitfire is going I'm going too!" said Rainbow
"Rainbow what are you doing?" asked Twilight "Are you featherbrained? Stay out of it"
"Actually Twilly you were brought here for the same reason they were" said Shining "We need all of your help for this mission"
"Why us?" asked Fluttershy hiding behind Rainbow
"Because my little ponies" said Princess Celestia "You are the elements of harmony. You are the best we have"
"See guys it's our job to save Equestria" said Rainbow proudly "We're coming with you guys"
"I'm sure you'll be a great support you three" said Spitfire with a smile
"Are you all nuts?!" asked Vinyl glaring at all of them "Do any of you remember what happened the last time we went after these guys? They turned Steam blind!"
"Scratch!" said Steam loudly She cringed back a bit as he trotted over to her. "You need to see the bigger picture. You know the danger as well as I do. But this isn't just about us. This is for all of Equestria."
"But brother..." said Vinyl
"I know sis" said Steam "But we are together this time. They won't separate us again I promise"
"Fine" said Vinyl nuzzling Steam "but if you leave again I'll buck your head off"
"I'll remember that" said Steam with a smile looking at Twilight, Rainbow and Fluttershy "Will you join us?"
"Of course" said Rainbow proudly
"I'll help if in any way I can" said Fluttershy
"I'm with you Steam" said Twilight "There are so many questions I want to ask you anyways"
"I'm truly thankful to all of you for your help" said Princess Celestia bowing her head "We will of course provide anything you need"
"Thank you old friend" said Steam bowing "We will of course require provisions and supplies. I will handle the transportation"
"How do you plan on transporting seven ponies that distance without a chariot?" asked Octavia curiously
"Let me worry about that Octy" said Steam "I think you'll like what the surprise"
"I thank you old friend for what you are doing" said Princess Celestia
"No I thank you" said Steam bowing "I know Shining wasn't the only one keeping track of me for these last couple years. Thanks for watching my back"
"I was merely paying back an old debt I owed" said Princess Celestia "When do you plan to depart?"
"I was hoping to leave as soon as tomorrow morning" said Steam rubbing his chin with his hoof "Can you send the supplies and provisions to my warehouse?"
"Of course" said Celestia "I suggest all of you go stay here at the palace for the night. So you can go with Steam in the morning. You are dismissed. These guards will show you to your rooms"
Everypony was escorted out of the room except for Steam and Princess Celestia.
"Was there something you wanted to say" asked Princess Celestia
"I wanted to thank you correctly" said Steam with a smile
"I was hoping you would say that Rusty" said Celestia getting down off of her throne and trotting up to Steam
"It's been a long time since I've been called that Tia" said Steam with a smile
"and it's been too long since I've been called that" said Celestia sitting in front of Steam with a smile
"To think that it's been six years since those days" said Steam with a sigh "I can still remember the feel of the mountains under my hooves"
"I would be lieing if I said I didn't miss those days Rusty" said Celestia wrapping her hooves around him
"We'll never forget them Tia" said Steam returning the hug "Thank you for always watching over me"
"Every Princess needs her hero Rusty" said Celestia tightening her grip "I couldn't let you go that easily"
"Thanks for never giving up on me" said Steam in a whisper "It means a lot"
"Would you mind sharing my quarters with me tonight?" asked Celestia releasing her embrace "For old times sake?"
"Sure Tia" said Steam with a smile "It's not the first time and with any luck it won't be the last"
Celestia smiled at him and put her wing over him pulling him close. They walked off together in the direction of the Princess's quarters. |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 9 | "Sigil what are you doing?" asked Silver curiously "The palace is this way"
"I can't go Silver" said Sigil with a sigh
"Why not?" asked Silver
"Look at what I have caused Silver" said Sigil flailing his hoof "Ever since I showed up in their lives bad things have been happening. It's like I am cursed to be alone"
"You don't seriously believe that do you?" said Silver angrily "Without you Twilight would be dead right now!"
"At what cost?!" yelled Sigil back "At the life of an innocent. A dear friend even?" Sigil punched a building in frustration "Was it even worth it?"
"He volunteered himself willingly" said Silver "It was an honorable sacrifice. One worthy of praise and remembrance"
"Was it necessary though?" asked Sigil "Would it have happened if I had never showed up here?"
"I can't answer that" said Silver shaking his head "But I can tell you that everything happens for a reason. You were brought here for a reason Sigil"
"Was I brought here just to make everpony's life a living nightmare?" asked Sigil pacing back and forth in the alley they were standing in They were in between two buildings in the industrial district of Canterlot.
"No It is my belief that you are a good pony Sigil" said Silver "You were brought here to look over these ponies"
"Then why bring you here Silver?" asked Sigil angrily "You are a mage hunter and a sell sword. Why bring a mage hunter here if not to hunt a mage?"
"I do not know why I am here" said Silver nodding "This is true, but neither do you. Don't be so quick to jump to conclusions Sigil"
"How can you stand there and lecture me about this?" asked Sigil "You have more blood on your paws than I do"
"This is also true" said Silver "Which is why I know that somethings are out of our control. You need to do what needs to be done and face the consequences of your actions"
"That's real sweet coming from the son of The Fallen" said Sigil
"I'd rather you leave my father out of this" said Silver growling "That's a ghost long since buried"
"Whatever" said Sigil "Hate me too everyone else does" He ran off down the alley and into the street disappearing into the crowd "I'll keep my promise regardless" was his final words
________________________________________________________________
Steam yawned as he awoke. He could feel warmth up against his stomach as he tightened his grip on the Alicorn laying next to him in bed. She let out a pleased sigh as she nuzzled his neck and tightened her grip. Steam could feel a slight breeze coming in from the open window and smelt the soft scent of morning dew on the wind.
"It's time to get up Tia" said Steam nuzzling her gently
"I don't want to get up yet" said Celestia with a yawn laying her head on Steams shoulder "I think morning can wait a bit more"
"Aren't you a princess Tia?" laughed Steam bopping her on the nose "Don't you have a job to do?"
"Says the laziest Stallion I know" giggled Celestia "Honestly you can be so cheesy sometimes"
"Why do people keep saying that" asked Steam confused
"I'm sure a smart colt like you will figure it out eventually" said Celestia kissing him on the cheek "I can't thank you enough for staying with me last night"
"It was no problem Tia" said Steam "What are friends for?"
"Yeah..." said Celestia sitting up with a sigh "Friends..."
"Tia are you alright?" asked Steam laying a hoof on her shoulder
"Does she love you?" asked Celestia laying her cheek on Steam's hoof
"Yes" said Steam "Thank you for mentioning her to Shining for me. It must have been hard for you"
"I wish things were different Rusty" said Celestia "She's not the only one who loves you"
"It would never work Tia. You know how lazy I am" said Steam scooting in closer to hug her from behind wrapping his hooves around her stomach "I couldn't handle that much responsibility"
"Why do I have to be a Princess?" asked Celestia putting her hooves on Steam's
"Because you are the correct one for the job Tia" said Steam giving her a squeeze "It's as simple as that"
"Your too sweet sometimes?" said Celestia with a chuckle"Do you know that?"
"You should tell Spitfire that" laughed Steam "She'd love to hear that coming from you Tia"
"I'm sure she would" said Celestia getting out of bed Steam stepped off the bed as well.
"Shall we go great the others" asked Steam walking to the door and opening it
"Yes Rusty let's great them together" said Celestia walking out after him and closing the door with a flash of her horn
They walked down the hallway together in silence for awhile. As they turned the corner Celestia extended her wing over Steam and pulled him closer to her.
"This won't be our last meeting Tia" said Steam "I'll be coming back to visit"
"I know I just wanted to give you something before I have to see you walk away again" said Celestia stepping in front of him
"What do you..." said Steam He was cut off when he felt Celestia press her lips to his. He tried to turn away but felt himself unable too . Even though she was his friend he couldn't help but feel something for the Princess.
Celestia pulled back with a smile and said "There you go"
"Do you do that for all of your friends?" said Steam with a chuckle
"Nope Rusty just for you" said Celestia nuzzling him Steam stepped away quickly and replied
"Well thank you old friend" he said with a smile "I'm sure I'll find some way to repay you for your kindness"
Twilight and Spitfire walk around the corner and trotted up to Steam and the Princess.
"Hello Princess" said Twilight happily nuzzling her mentor "Good morning Steam"
"Good morning Twilight" said Steam with a nod of his head "Hello Spitfire did you sleep well last night?"
"I had a good rest" replied Spitfire giving Steam a quizzical look "How did you sleep?"
"I had to share some memories with an old friend" said Steam with a smile "Nothing for you to worry about"
"Alright" said Spitfire trotting up to Steam and giving him a kiss "I know you wouldn't lie to me"
"The rest of them are waiting out front" said Twilight "we shouldn't keep them waiting"
"Let's get going" said Steam urging them onwards "Goodbye old friend. It was good seeing you again."
"I agree old friend you should come by more often" said Celestia looking away as they turned the corner She didn't want them to see the tears in her eyes.
The three made their way outside and picked up the others. Once a head count was done they set out across town to Steam's warehouse. They were escorted by four royal guards two in front two in back. It was more for show than protection. As they walked past ponies stepped aside and let them through.
Rainbow loved the attention waving as if she was famous. Fluttershy on the other hoof tried to hide behind her exuberant marefriend. Vinyl was bouncing with each step her headphones over her ears. Octavia was having a formal conversation with Spitfire about how their mornings have gone. Steam was trying to answer Twilight's barrage of questions with little success.
"So where did you go for so many years? Why are you back? How many things have you invented?...." rambled Twilight wanting to know a little too much
"One question at a time please" begged Steam rubbing his forehead
"Oh sorry" said Twilight blushing from embarrassment "It's just your a famous gear-smith"
"is that what they're calling me these days?" laughed Steam "I'm just a normal pony like you. Just calm down and ask your questions"
"Alright" said Twilight nodding "Firstly where did you go for so many years?"
"All over the place actually" replied Steam "I was constantly on the move. I wanted be alone. I didn't care where or how. I ended up staying in Manehattan for two years before I bought an abandoned warehouse back here in Canterlot. Been there ever since."
"Okay" said Twilight taking mental notes "Why did you leave in the first place? I heard it was an accident"
Steam let out a sigh as he walked "It happened four years ago. There was an explosion at my dormitory in Canterlot University. Octavia was inside it looking for me when it happened. She had heard about a bomb planted by a group called the Nightmares and had come to warn me. Unfortunately for her I wasn't there I had run out of scrap metal for my latest project and went to get some more from my shop teacher."
"What happened then?" asked Twilight interested
"On my way back I ran into Vinyl. She was in a frenzy screaming that Octavia was in trouble. We hurried over to my dormitory but it was too late, the bomb went off. Fire coated what was remaining of the dorm. Vinyl was frozen in terror at the sight. Against my better judgment, I went inside the flaming building."
"How bad was it?" asked Twilight a studious look on her face
"The inside of the building was a mess. Support columns were laying around and flames were spreading quickly. I ran through as fast as I could getting singed a little in the process screaming if anyone was there. I heard Tavi whimpering from inside one of the rooms."
"Was she okay?" asked Twilight looking back at Octavia pleasantly chatting away
"She had been hit in the initial detonation." replied Steam shaking his head "Her eyes had been seared. She was blinded. I picked her up and carried her out. On the way a pillar fell from the ceiling. I used my wings to catch it and fling it to the side. Doing so I caught my wings on fire. I didn't have time to put them out, nor the means to do so. I just bolted for the exit. Once I got outside I dropped off Octavia and tried to put out my wings"
"Is that how you got your metal wings?" asked Twilight curiously
"Yes" answered Steam nodding his head "After passing out from the pain, I woke in the school infirmary. They told me they had to amputate my wings, they were too damaged to repair even with magic. I was devastated. Later when I was on the go I met a traveling physician. He told me that the nerves my wings connected to still lived. So I built these to replace them."
"What happened to Octavia?" asked Twilight practically begging
"Her eyes were burned beyond repair" said Steam looking back at his friend with his sightless gaze "The news destroyed her. She is a musician not just by trade but in heart. I couldn't let her lose her dreams because she was looking out for me."
"What did you do?" asked Twilight lightly
"I gave her my eyes" said Steam pointing to his bandage
"Wow..." said Twilight looking down at her hooves "I didn't know all that. I'm sorry I asked"
"Nah It's no big deal" said Steam with a comforting smile "It happened four years ago. What's done is done. Never wish to undo your past, just try to fix your future."
"I just don't get one thing" said Twilight confused "I know all this stuff happened too you, but I just don't see why if you would give your friend your eyes. Why would you just leave?"
"Because she took something I felt I couldn't live without." said Steam looking at Twilight "Bones can mend and buildings can be rebuilt, but friendships and trust. These things are more difficult to repair. That is why I left. I needed a break from it all. I wanted to be alone so that no one could ever hurt me again"
"Its strange" thought Twilight "Even though I know he's blind I can't help but feel he can look straight through me. What else don't I know about this pony?"
"Why did you come back then If you wanted to be alone?" asked Twilight
"Because I finally realized that even though friendships can be a pain in your arse at times" said Steam "It are those friendships that make you strong enough to overcome what life has throw at you. All it took to get me too realize that was a little help from a special somepony."
"Spitfire?" asked Twilight poking Steam with a hoof
"Yes" said Steam with an adoring sigh "She made me see things with a new light. I could never thank her enough for all she's done for me"
"Well you could always try" said Spitfire with a giggle trotting ahead to join Twilight and Steam
"Glad you could join us" said Steam smiling
"I'll always be at your side Steam" replied Spitfire "besides someone needed to tell you we're here"
"Ah yes" said Steam slowing his pace down rubbing the back of his neck with a hoof "I was too involved in conversation to notice. Thank you Spitfire"
"No problem" she said walking away to join the others near the entrance to the warehouse
Steam was very proud of his warehouse despite it's horrible appearance and cluttered interior. He had spent a good amount of time doing incredible things inside it's walls. One of which was now illuminated as if on display. It stood 35 tail length's tall and dwarfed the rest of Steam's inventions by a landslide.
"Steam is that?" asked Vinyl confused
"Yes Vinyl it is" answered Steam sitting back and sighing his sightless gaze scanning over his creation
It was a massive ship. It was 250 tail lengths wide by 300 tail length long. It seemed to be made out of plated brass and aluminum. Twilight looked closely and could see the rivets connecting each plate on the hull.
"Steam I thought you were never able to find the crash site?" asked Octavia looking at Steam "How ever did you find this"
"I never did" sighed Steam "The Falconer is still lost. I built this one in four years. It was much easier the second time."
"Excuse me Steam" said Fluttershy quietly "but if it's not asking to much, what is this thing?"
"Everypony I would like to meet the Albatross" said Steam gesturing to the massive ship "It is an Airship of my own invention. It travels on the sea and in the air."
"How does it do that?" asked Rainbow confused
"It would take way to long to explain" laughed Steam "Just have a little faith in the Albatross. I promise she won't disappoint"
"If you say so..." said Rainbow
"Everyone go on inside" said Steam pulling a lever on the side of the hull Everypony could hear the massive gears turning on the inside of the side as a staircase descended out of the side of the hull. Everypony besides Steam, Twilight and Rainbow climbed on inside. Vinyl and Octavia could be heard directing Spitfire and Fluttershy around the interior of the ship.
"Any reason you two stayed out here?" asked Steam
"Yeah" said Rainbow taking a few steps closer to Steam causing him to take a step back "Why is it that you and the Princess were all buddy buddy? I've never heard anypony call her an old friend before"
"I'm her most trusted student" said Twilight proudly "Even I don't call her that. I would like to know too"
"I've known the Princess for a very very long time." said Steam casually "Probably longer than you two have been born"
"How long?" asked Twilight curiously
"Let me ask you this" said Steam slyly "How old do you think I am?"
"Maybe 30 years old?" said Rainbow thinking "Maybe 32"
"Thank you for that wonderful compliment Rainbow Dash" laughed Steam "but you are quite a ways off"
"Well then maybe you should tell us how old you actually are?" suggested Twilight
"What good would that do anyone?" said Steam with a smile "besides who doesn't like a little mystery now and then"
Before Twilight and Rainbow could get anymore out of him, a storm began to rage above their heads. It came out of nowhere. It looked as though a tornado had appeared on top of the Albatross. It began swirling around faster and faster shooting lightning off as it did so.
"That's no normal storm" said Rainbow "I've never seen anything like it"
"I have" said Twilight "It looks exactly like the one that brought Sigil here"
"Come on" said Steam spreading his wings As he did so the metal feathers he had separated and a third set unfolded extending his wings to full length. "We need to get to the deck and check it out. Twilight hop on my back"
Twilight hopped on to his back and wrapped her hooves around his neck. As Steam took off buffeting the air with his wings, the sheer force of the take off was like hitting a brick wall. Twilight struggled to stay on as he soared up to the deck. Through her squinting eyes Twilight saw Rainbow landing beside them as they hit the deck.
Twilight released her grip praising Celestia as her hooves hit the floor. The three looked up at the storm over their heads. It began to change into a dark purple color as it swirled faster. A glimmer caught Rainbow's eye as an object was launched from the center of the storm. It flew end over end as it fell towards the Albatross. It hit with a sickening crunch as it plunged itself into the deck.
"What is it?" asked Steam curiously stepping in to get a quick sniff It smelled metallic but it was not a metal he was familiar with.
"It's a sword" said Twilight startled "but it's bigger than any sword I've ever seen"
"Hey the storm is disappearing" said Rainbow pointing with her hoof The storm began to dissipate and soon disappeared as if it had never been there at all. They all looked at the sword with wonder. It stood 6 tail lengths tall with 3 more buried into the deck and it had to be half a tail length thick and a tail length wide.
"Who would use a sword this massive" asked Twilight critically "It seems a little ridiculous to me"
"Because you can't see how awesome this thing is" said Rainbow trotting over to it "Just look at it. So cool" she reached out and touched it's hilt with a hoof She instantly pulled it back screaming in pain. "Ouch that hurts" cried Rainbow shaking her injured hoof
"What just happened" asked Steam concerned "Are you all right Rainbow Dash?"
"Yeah I'm fine" said Rainbow casting her glance at the sword again "I don't know what just happened I touched the sword and it felt like fire was flowing over my hoof"
"I'd bet that that sword is cursed" said Twilight inspecting Rainbow's hoof "It didn't do any damage I can see, but I don't think we should try to touch that thing again with out figuring out more about it"
"Good thinking Twilight" said Steam scratching his muzzle with a hoof "But how are we going to get it out of the deck. We can't just leave it there, that would just be asking for trouble later."
"I could see if I could levitate it out" said Twilight cautiously "I wouldn't physically be touching it"
"I wouldn't do that if I were you" said a snowy white stallion emerging from the shadows under the stairway behind them
"Who are you" asked Rainbow taking a defensive stance
"Wow Rainbow it's me Silverstreak" said the stallion "don't you recognize me?"
"Nice try but last time I checked Silverstreak is a wolf" said Rainbow
"Oh I almost forgot" said Silver facehoofing "A friend of yours cast an illusion on me to make me look like a pony. Couldn't be walking through town scaring everypony, you know?"
"He's telling the truth" said Steam catching his scent "He smells of meat. Tell tale wolf smell"
"How do you know a wolf Rainbow?" asked Twilight
"Silver is the same wolf that helped me fight that hydra back in Ponyville. Fluttershy helped him with his wounds after the fight." replied Rainbow
"Ah you must be Twilight" said Silver looking at the violet unicorn with a smile "Sorry I didn't get the chance to introduce myself back in Ponyville. You left before I got the chance. Hey is there anyway you could get this illusion of of me?"
"Um.. sure let me see what I can do" replied Twilight unsure she wanted to She had read stories of wolves before, they weren't exactly happy endings. Her horn glowed and Silver began to shimmer and in a few seconds he was back to his normal Wolf self. "There you go. Which one of our friends did that Illusion? It was very well layered"
"Sigil Flare helped me out with it" said Silverstreak looking himself over "I have to say though I'll take being a wolf over a pony any day"
"You don't sound like any wolf I've ever met" said Steam "Who are you really?"
"Who is this?" asked Silverstreak curiously "A new friend?" He tried to look inside the stallions mind to only find a wall blocking him off from the ponies thoughts.
"You can stop trying to read my thoughts Kurt" said Steam with a sly smile "It's not my first encounter with a telepath."
"You read my thoughts?" asked Silver shocked
"I can see your confused" said Steam with a chuckle "You see Silver when you try to read a "person's" thoughts as you believe you actually extend your mind to touch theirs and view their thoughts. So it was fairly easy for me to catch some of your mind when you attempted to read mine."
"There is more to you than meets the eye isn't there" said Silverstreak with a smile
"Did you say person?" asked Twilight "Silver you wouldn't happen to be a human as well would you?"
"Not entirely no, but I am part human yes" replied Silverstreak "Why do you ask?"
"I wanted to ask you if you knew that Sigil was a human as well?" said Twilight's
"Yes I knew that Sigil was a human" said Silverstreak licking his paw "Probably by the way he didn't run in terror when I talked to him."
"Did you know him before he was a pony?" asked Twilight curiously
"You could say that" said Silverstreak licking his paw swiftly "I was just talking to him a moment ago."
"Do you know where he is now?" Twilight asked
"No I'm sorry I don't. He ran away from me. Said something about keeping his promise as he was running off" said Silverstreak "I didn't give chase because this caught my attention" He pointed a paw at the sword dug into the deck
Silver walked over and went to grab the sword's handle in his mouth.
"Silver don't touch it!" yelled Rainbow trying to stop him "It's cursed"
Silver chomped down on the handle of the sword and heaved it out of the deck. He seemed unphased like he wasn't even effected by the same pain that hurt Rainbow. He swung the sword a few times experimentally before laying it down on the floor at his paws.
"It's not cursed Rainbow" said Silverstreak calmly "At least not for me"
"That's your sword isn't it?" said Steam "That's why you aren't affected by it's enchantment"
"Another brilliant deduction" said Silverstreak with a smile "I'm starting to take a liking to you. What's your name?"
"I am Steam Gear" replied the rust haired Pegasus with a curt bow
"Why does your sword do that to other ponies" asked Rainbow angrily "It really hurts"
"This sword was forged nearly 1500 years ago by the greatest sword smith ever known. It's power was so feared that a group of magician's cursed the blade to only be able to be wielded by one person." said Silverstreak
"But certainly your not 1500 years old" said Twilight "How did you get it?"
"I got it from killing it's previous wielder" said Silverstreak "And it will go to whomever kills me. That is how it works"
"Does your sword have a name?" asked Rainbow excited "Surely if it's so powerful it will have a really awesome name!"
"This swords original name I couldn't possibly pronounce even if I tried" said Silverstreak running a paw down it's blade "I call it The Oathbreaker"
"That is so cool!" said Rainbow staring at the sword
"So what are you going to do now Silver?" asked Steam "You have your sword"
"I was sort of hoping I could hang with you" said Silverstreak "I don't really know anypony else around here"
"Sure thing Silver you can hang with us it'll be awesome to have you on board" said Rainbow giving him a hoof to paw bump
"As Captain of this ship" said Steam authoritatively "I would like to welcome you aboard the Albatross"
"I hope I can be of some help" said Silverstreak shaking Steam's hoof
"Come on everypony" said Steam ushering them below deck "We should join the others before they wonder where we've gone"
They went down below decks Steam in the lead. As they descended the spiral staircase the got to see some of the internal workings of the ship. It had a ton of steam blocking the heart of it's workings from view but what they could see blew their minds. The gears that were turning were bigger than some of the houses of Ponyville.
"How did you build this?" asked Rainbow jaw dropping
"It wasn't easy let me tell you" said Steam with a chuckle "but I'm stronger than I look"
"You just get more interesting every minute" said Silverstreak "glad I could stick around"
They passed down another floor and were met with a vast hallway of the same riveted brass and aluminum as the outside. It had doors going down it on each side. Looking down to the end of the hallway they saw their friends. As they approached they were given very awkward looks.
"Um.. okay" started Vinyl "Any reason you have a bucking wolf behind you with a ridiculously over sized sword?"
"This is Silverstreak" said Steam patting the wolf on his shoulder "He will be joining us on our voyage"
"I hate to say this Steam" said Octavia "but are you sure it's a good idea to bring a wolf on board a ship with a bunch of ponies?"
"Silver isn't really a wolf" said Twilight "He's a human from another world"
"Oh not this again" said Vinyl "I thought It was just Lyra who was crazy, but now it's the Princess's own student too!"
"I'm not crazy!" said Twilight "It's the truth"
"Vinyl that was very rude" scolded Octavia turning a soft expression on Twilight "I'm sorry about that I'm sure your quite right. It's just that Vinyl's friend Lyra keeps going on and on about humans"
"Well I'm sorry to burst your bubble everypony but I am a human and a Wolf" said Silverstreak
"Your what?" asked Rainbow confused "how is that possible?"
"I am the last of a species called the Tr'dal. We are half human and half wolf." said Silverstreak
"Still think It's a bad idea" said Vinyl loudly"He eats meat. We're meat!"
"I don't eat only meat" said Silverstreak "Besides I've never liked the taste of pony. To chewy"
"He's practically saying he's eaten a pony before!" said Vinyl a worried look on her face "Your letting him stay on board after that?!"
"Silverstreak?" said Fluttershy poking her head out of a doorway
"Fluttershy" said Silverstreak with a smile "How good to see you again"
"Did you really eat a pony?" asked Fluttershy looking up at the wolf a fearful look in her eye
"Yes" said Silverstreak "Where I come from ponies don't talk. They don't build houses or fantastical flying airships either. They are just an animal for us to eat like cows and chickens."
"Oh..." said Fluttershy looking down at her hooves
"But I have to say now that I have talked to some ponies" said Silverstreak "I will never eat another pony ever."
"So you have eaten a pony!" yelled Vinyl in triumph "Steam please tell me your kicking him off the ship now"
"Vinyl" said Silverstreak walking over to her Vinyl's head only came to Silver's shoulder. He towered over her a blank expression on his face. "Let me ask you a question. Your hungry, out of money, wounded badly. If you don't find something to eat you are going to die. The only thing close by for you to eat is a pony. What would you do?"
"I...I don't know" replied Vinyl taking a step back from Silver
"I hope you never have too" said Silverstreak walking back to sit beside Steam
"Well I'd say after that performance we all need something to eat" said Steam clacking his hooves together "Everyone follow me to the dining room and we can get lunch started"
"Alright food" cheered everypony except for Vinyl and Octavia They stayed behind as the rest of them walked off towards the dining room.
"Are you okay Vinyl?" Octavia nuzzling her marefriend worriedly
"I'm fine Tavi" said Vinyl shaking her head getting a grip on herself "I just wasn't ready for that sort of thing you know?"
"None of us were Vinyl" said Octavia comfortingly "But come on it's time for lunch"
"I don't think I'll be able to eat much right now Tavi" said Vinyl trotting alongside her marefriend
"No worries" giggled Octavia bumping her marefriend's flanks with her's "I don't think anypony would blame you" |
Darkness Surrounding | Chapter 10 | It's been two days since the start of our heroes journey. Silverstreak has finally been accepted by the group. It took awhile for Vinyl to warm to the fact he eats meat, but after watching him eat dandelion sandwiches for the last two days, she admitted he wasn't going to eat any member of the crew. It also helped that Silverstreak enjoyed Vinyl's kind of music.
Silverstreak had found a true friend in Rainbow Dash. At first she was aggravated by his seemingly effortless coolness. He always had a serious face on and only put on a smile when it was necessary. After a while though Silverstreak caught Rainbow practicing her acrobatics. At first Rainbow started showing off, no reason not to show off her skills she thought. When she looked back Silverstreak was gone.
Rainbow went looking for him finding him in the sparring quarters. He had set up a very large cube of metal. He wrapped it with his paw, making it give a metallic ting. Rainbow watched as Silverstreak brought his paw back, she lost sight of it as it flashed forward punching a hole straight through the solid metal block. Rainbow's jaw dropped, but Silverstreak didn't stop he kept going.
He brought his paws back and forth in a rhythmic wave of destruction. Rainbow started backing out of the room as the block was turned to rubble in mere seconds. Rainbow froze in place as Silverstreak let out a deep growl and put his paws to his head. He dropped to the floor and writhed as if he was being beaten.
Rainbow immediately flew to his side asking if he was okay, looking him over. He slowly stopped writhing breathing deeply. He removed his paws from his head and let them lay on the floor at his sides.
"Sorry you had to see that" said Silverstreak panting
"What just happened?" asked Rainbow "Should I get help?"
"No I'll be fine" said Silverstreak getting to a sitting position
"Are you sure?" asked Rainbow shooting him a questioning look "You didn't look fine a few seconds ago. Look at what you did to that block" She pointed in the direction of the remains of said block.
"Oh you saw that?" asked Silverstreak looking at his paws his ears drooping "I have no problems if you want me to leave"
"Why in Celestia's name would I want you to leave?" asked Rainbow confused
"Because I'm a berserker" said Silverstreak
"A what?" said Rainbow still not getting it
"A berserker is somepony who, when they get too angry or taste blood, enter a blind rage in which they gain incredible strength and will attack anything in sight" said Silverstreak
"That sounds awesome" said Rainbow excited "Can I do that?"
"No and you don't want to" said Silverstreak with a frown
"Why not?" asked Rainbow frustrated "Am I not allowed to be one?"
"No it's because when your in the berserker state you can't stop yourself" said Silverstreak looking away "You'll destroy everything in your path.... even your.... family"
"Oh..." said Rainbow scratching the back of her neck awkwardly "Well in that case I don't think I want to be a berserker, but why were you so angry?"
"I say you practicing your flying" admitted Silverstreak with a awkward smile "I've always wanted to fly"
"You could have said something" said Rainbow with a smirk "You didn't have to come down here and wreck stuff"
"I'm not one for talking about stuff" said Silverstreak shrugging his shoulders
"Hey I'm your friend Silver." said Rainbow putting a hoof on his shoulder "If you ever wanna talk about stuff come see me alright?"
"Really?" asked Silverstreak a gleam in his eye
"Really" said Rainbow with a chuckle "I'd never leave a friend hanging"
After that Silverstreak started coaching Rainbow Dash in fighting techniques and Rainbow helps Silverstreak handle his anger. They asked Steam Gear if they could fix up the sparring quarters to use as a training ground. With his permission they started renovations.
The next day Steam had called everyone else into the chart room to discuss their course.
"Alright with Silverstreak now aboard we are going through supplies faster than originally thought" said Steam "We need to make port somewhere to resupply"
"What about Stalliongrad?" asked Vinyl hopefully
"Vinyl that's north." said Octavia face hoofing "we're going south"
"I know I've just always wanted to go to Stalliongrad" said Vinyl with a smile
"Steam why don't we head east towards Fillydelphia?" said Spitfire pointing a hoof at the chart displayed on the table in front of themselves "It's only a day away if we divert course now"
"That won't work with the wind we have now" said Steam with a shake of his head "It's blowing from the east. We'd lose more time than we'd gain"
"Why not go to Las Pegasus?" suggested Octavia "It's two days away to the east but with the wind behind our sails it should be less than a day and a half"
"Smart suggestion Octavia" said Steam with a smile "I didn't take you for a sailor"
"Tavi stayed up all night yesterday studying boating" said Vinyl with a chuckle "She's such an egg head sometimes"
"Some of us prefer to be useful Vinyl" said Octavia defensively "Don't you agree Twilight?"
Twilight was over in the corner of the room with a glazed look in her eye. She didn't even acknowledge Octavia's statement.
"Hey Twilight, anypony home?" yelled Vinyl rather rudely
"Huh... what?" asked Twilight shaking her head
"Are you okay dear?" asked Octavia concerned for her new friend and shooting a venomous look at the DJ sitting beside her "You don't look well"
"Nah I'm fine" said Twilight rubbing her eye with a hoof "Just a little tired is all"
"What do you think about going to Las Pegasus?" asked Steam curiously
"Isn't that a little off course?" asked Twilight staring at the map on the table a little to noticeably "Shouldn't we be going south?"
"Dear we just decided to go that way to get some supplies" said Octavia "You sure your okay?"
"I'm fine!" yelled Twilight defensively "Just didn't sleep well is all"
"Wow Twilight" said Vinyl laughing "No need to yell"
"I'm gonna go take a walk" said Twilight getting up and walking out of the room "Las Pegasus will work out fine, I'm sure you know what your doing"
Octavia gave Vinyl an odd look. Steam looked over to Spitfire, who nodded in silent reply. She got up excused herself and left to follow the lavender unicorn. Turning the first corner she caught a glimpse of Twilight's tail disappearing around a corner and began to sneak after her. Spitfire followed her up the spiral staircase to the deck.
She stayed out of sight as best she could, ducking behind barrels when Twilight would occasionally look over her shoulder. It was obvious to Spitfire, wherever she was going, Twilight didn't want anypony following her. She lost her as she ducked past the front mast onto the bow of the Albatross.
Spitfire got closer to see if she could spot Twilight. She spotted the unicorn sitting on the edge of the bow her front hooves over the edge swaying in the breeze. Spitfire breathed a sigh of relief. All Twilight wanted was a good view and a breath of fresh air. She turned to leave, but stopped as she heard a soft crying sound.
Twilight was crying softly, the noise almost drowned out by the wind. Spitfire knew she couldn't just leave her there like this. She trotted over and sat down next to her. Twilight took no notice of her until she reached out and touched Twilight's shoulder with her nose.
"Twilight?" asked Spitfire gently
"Spitfire?" replied Twilight her ears folding down in shame "What are you doing here?"
"I came to see if you were alright?" said Spitfire reaching out a comforting hoof
"I told you I'm fine" said Twilight batting away the hoof "Now go away. I want to be alone"
"I'm not going anywhere" replied Spitfire sternly
"Fine" said Twilight irritably "then I will"
"Is this about Sigil Flare?" asked Spitfire a quizzical expression on her face
"What are you talking about?" asked Twilight in a panic "He's just a friend"
"I didn't say he was anything more" giggled Spitfire "but I'd say he's a lot more than just a friend, if he gets that response from you"
"Oh..." said Twilight looking at her hooves It was obvious to Spitfire that Twilight had remorse written all over her. Head down, ears drooped, and eyes closed.
"Twilight I know Sigil didn't show up at the meeting a few days ago" said Spitfire "I'm beginning to think you know why"
"I...I" stumbled Twilight forcing the words out "I yelled at him"
"For what happened to Spike?" asked Spitfire
"How...?" asked Twilight confused
"Fluttershy told me" Spitfire answered
"Yes, for what happened to Spike" said Twilight rambling "I was mad and confused and and"
"It's okay Twilight" said Spitfire
"No it is NOT okay" yelled Twilight forcably closing her eyes as she remembered "I said horribly things. Things I wish I had never said. I told him he wasn't a pony, That I never wanted to see him ever again" She grabbed her head in her hoofs and yelled in frustration tears streaming down her face
"It's not your fault" said Spitfire trying her best to try and keep Twilight calm
"Don't you get it!?" screamed Twilight glaring at Spitfire a pained look in her lavender eyes "It's all my fault. I am the element of MAGIC ITSELF! If hadn't have lost to Trixie none of this would have happened to him!"
"Don't say things like that!" said Spitfire in a worried tone
"Why not? It's true" said Twilight angrily banging her hoof on the deck "All he wanted to do was start over. To FORGET about all the bad things. To make FRIENDS, ponies that care about him, who's lives he wouldn't put in danger just by being ALIVE. I was his ONLY one! And I let him down...." Twilight's entire body shook with the force of her anger and frustration
"TWILIGHT SPARKLE!" roared Silverstreak walking up to her and looking down on her She looked up at him with tear stained cheeks and fearful eyes. Silver drew his lips back in a snarl as he spoke "LISTEN TO ME!"
"Silverstreak..." mouthed Spitfire choosing not to interfere yet
"Listen to yourself!" said Silverstreak growling angrily "Your whining like a little foal! You messed up, so what? Beating yourself up and destroying yourself from the inside out won't help."
"But..." replied Twilight fearfully Silverstreak wrapped a paw around Twilight's neck his claws gripping her fur and hoisted her off the ground shaking her a bit
"You are the pony that discovered the Elements of Harmony" said Silverstreak "You said yourself you are the Element of Magic. I know your no Rainbow Dash, but show a little loyalty towards your friends. If you really are his only friend, then you need to be there for him. Your only as strong as your determination to be strong"
Silverstreak then threw Twilight across the deck. She landed a few feet away her back aching from impacting the hard metal of the deck. She shook her head getting rid of her daze and caught Silver's gaze before he turned around. It was a look of disapproval and longing.
"Now pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and buck up" said Silverstreak beginning to walk away
"Why are you doing this?" asked Twilight "Why are you helping me"
Silverstreak stopped and not looking back at Twilight and replied "because... Sigil Flare deserves better than me" Then he walked out of view
"Are you alright?" asked Spitfire
"Don't worry. I'm okay" laughed Twilight "I've fallen out of bed enough times that this is nothing"
"What did he mean Sigil deserves better than him?" asked Spitfire confused
"I have no idea" replied Twilight thinking "But I think there's more to that wolf than meets the eye" Twilight noticed a glint in the corner of her eye. At first glance it looked like a small black box. Upon closer inspection it was a solid black cube with a golden band running along it's middle. On top it had a very familiar looking Arcane Sigil.
"What's this?" asked Twilight picking up the cube in her hoof
"I don't know I've never seen anything like it" replied Spitfire a studious look on her face
Twilight touched her hoof to the Sigil on top and it flashed bright lavender. The box let out a blast of air and the gold band split in half the top levitating off the cube splitting it in half. In the middle of the now floating cube was a black semi translucent orb. Suspended inside the orb was a brightly glowing star.
There was a note inside. It read as follows:
Dear Twilight,
A gift from Sigil's late father. A family heirloom if I remember correctly. There's an old saying my father used to tell me. When your lost, look to the stars, and they will light your path.
Silverstreak
"I don't believe it...." stammered Twilight in shock and amazement
"What," asked Spitfire "do you recognize this thing?"
"It's a Lorestone" answered Twilight deadpanning "I thought they were just a myth..."
"What's a Lorestone" asked Spitfire prodding the orb "I've never heard of them before"
"A Lorestone is something said in an old marestail." explained Twilight "The story goes that a Unicorn was on his way home one night and used a star to guide his path. When he looked to the sky the following night he couldn't see the star in the sky and got lost. When his wife realized he had not come home she grew worried. She had often heard her husband speak of his guiding star. Finding it in the sky she used her magic to pull out of the sky. Doing so she broke it into pieces. These pieces of star were to be named Lorestones. When the unicorn finally return home he met his wife smiling at the door. She handed him a glowing stone in the shape of a star and said "If ever you find yourself lost again, throw this into the sky to find your way home"
"So why would Silver give you this then?" asked Spitfire confused scratching her head with a hoof "It doesn't make sense"
"Don't you get it?" asked Twilight figuring it out "Who is lost right now? Sigil Flare! He said he would be following us. Silver said he deserved better than him. He was talking about me! He wants me to use the Lorestone to guide Sigil home. Back to me!" She felt like floating away in joy
"That sounds wonderful and all" said Spitfire "but how did he get Sigil's father's Lorestone in the first place?"
"I don't know" said Twilight seriously "But I'm going to find out."
___________________________________
Sigil sat in a coffee shop in the outskirts of Canterlot, his head laid in his hooves in defeat. He'd failed. Within the first day he had lost track of the giant ship that Twilight had embarked upon. He had been forced to retreat back to Canterlot so as not to get lost. Now he had no idea where Twilight was headed and no way to follow her. It seemed hopeless.
What's worse is that he couldn't get her out of his head. Every time Sigil closed his eyes he saw her face in tears as he was walking away. He took a look at his mug of coffee in front of him on the table. He smacked it off the table with a hoof and it shattered on the floor. The ponies in the coffee shop turned to look at who made the noise.
The shattered mug glowed a faint gold and began piecing itself back together. It flew up and landed back on the table in front of Sigil causing him to look up into the face of princess Celestia herself.
"That's very disrespectful to your host" said Princess Celestia sitting across from Sigil
"What are you doing here?" asked Sigil inspecting the newly reformed coffee mug "How did you find me?"
"I noticed you walking in here and thought I would check up on you." replied Celestia "Make sure your okay"
"I'm terrific" replied Sigil laying his head on the table "So glad you decided to stop by"
"Don't you sound happy" said Shining Armor walking into the coffee shop
"Ah Shining" said Celestia smiling "What are you doing here?"
"I always come here on Tuesdays" said Shining with a smile "The have half priced lattes. I do wonder why it is you are here Princess?"
"I was just checking up on your Sigil Flare" replied Celestia pointing a hoof at Sigil
"So your Sigil Flare" said Shining glaring at him "What are you doing here instead of chasing after my sister?"
"Your sister?" asked Sigil worriedly "Your Twilight's brother? Look if your here to beat me up or something just do it now and save me sometime"
"As much as that sounds like fun" said Shining handing him a letter "I actually wanted to give you this letter. It's from an old roommate of mine. He just happens to be on the ship Twilly's on board. You may want to take a gander at it."
"How did you get this?" asked Sigil "How did he know you would give it to me?"
"he sent it with his falcon Talon. It is dated yesterday." said Shining "That's just how he works. Sometimes I feel like he can see the future."
"Do you know what it says?" asked Celestia enjoying all the mystery, a pleasant smile on her face
"I didn't open it" replied Shining dutifully "It was addressed to Sigil Flare"
"Could it be from Twilight?" asked Sigil hope shining in his eyes
"It could be" answered Celestia motioning for him to open it "Why not open it and find out?"
Sigil grabbed the letter in his magic and tore it open and skimmed over the contents. He wore a confused expression on his face when he lowered the letter to the table.
"I don't get it" said Sigil "It only has two sentences!"
Shining Armor grabbed the letter and read it aloud "If this letter finds you lost, look to the night sky. There you will find a star most bright, shining with a lavender light."
"I understand it perfectly" said Celestia with a smile "It's a set of instructions for you to follow"
"What are you talking about?" asked Shining "How can you understand it?"
"Because it's written like the poems an old friend used to write." said Celestia "He saying that if you got lost you should wait until the sun sets and look to the sky. If you find a star shining brighter than the others, with a lavender light follow that one."
"How can a light shine with lavender light?" asked Sigil "that seems impossible"
"Think about it for a second" said Celestia with a chuckle "Do you two know any Lavender Unicorns?"
"Do you mean a Lorestone?" asked Sigil beginning to understand "Where did Twilight get one?"
"I don't know but that is what the letter says" said Celestia
"What are you two talking about?" asked Shining confused "What's a Lorestone?"
"How do I follow her though" asked Sigil "She must be miles away by now"
"Sigil" said Celestia "You know spells that Equestria could only dream of. Surely you must have some way to catch up to them"
"I will think of something Princess be sure of that" said Sigil blushing at her praise "I must go off to prepare whatever it is I am going to be doing" He stood up and began to trot for the door
"Take good care of my Niece" said Celestia with a chuckle as he walked out the door
Once Shining Armor had gotten himself and Celestia a latte, he sat down across from the Princess. Handing her the latte he said
"I sure hope Uncle knows what he's doing" said Shining "If not I fear that Sigil will be sadly disappointed"
"Don't worry" replied Celestia sipping on her latte "I know my brother better than anypony. He knows what he's doing or he wouldn't be doing it."
"Still though," said Shining wiping off a latte foam goatee with a hoof "Don't you think we should have told Twilly that he was her Uncle?"
"And take away the fun of telling her himself?" chuckled Celestia |
Oncoming Storm: What Lurks Beyond | pre | "I plan to." She remained silent for a long moment in a transparent attempt to build tension for the reveal. To her mild credit, when she did ultimately reveal her intentions they were nefarious enough to justify the dramatics. "Storm Kicker. I dare you to..." She leveled a finger at Twilight Sparkle. "Kiss her. Not just a quick peck, a real kiss."
Despite all the forewarning, my jaw still hit the ground."Wh-WHAT?!"
Twilight's mouth gaped open in shock, and her cheeks had already turned beet-red. "You want her to ... um..."
Sparkler grinned and slapped her fellow brat on the back. "Wow, Star. Props--I think you managed to break both of them at once." She turned to Twilight. "Though really, what's the big deal anyway? You already got to third base with Storm, this is just going back and letting her get her fair share."
Rarity looked between the two of us. "I suppose it was inevitable the dares would get a touch risque, but I wasn't expecting anything like this."
Applejack snorted. "Last time someone tossed out a kissing dare, you were all for it."
Rarity shot her an arch look. "I certainly don't recall you complaining about it at the time, darling. In fact, I seem to recall you being quite enthusiastic about your side of it."
Star cocked her head to the side. "So there's precedent for kissing being a perfectly valid choice for a dare?"
"Yes and no," Sunset answered. "There's precedent for it being okay for Rainbow to dare Rarity to kiss Applejack in those specific circumstances. This is different." She turned to me and Twilight. "It's completely up to you two whether you want to or not. No pressure, and nobody will think less of you if you don't."
"I will," Star cut in.
"Nobody who counts will think less of you," Cloud countered.
"It's okay." Twilight turned to face her, her cheeks still flaming. "I mean, I-I guess that would be okay. It's just a little kiss, r-right? It's not that big a deal..."
I took a deep breath and tried to put the shock out of my mind. Star had doubtless come up with that dare specifically to outrage and embarrass me. Therefore, the logical move was to deny her the reaction she wanted. Just do the dare without making a big production of it, and move on to the next event. Oh, and start plotting my revenge. "Yes, I suppose we could do that, so long as you are also willing."
Sunset frowned and looked between us again. "Look, despite what your sister and cousin might say, there's no peer pressure on this. You don't have to do anything if you don't want to."
Sparkler rolled her eyes. "They're both willing, stop trying to talk them out of it."
I looked at Twilight and took a deep breath. "Well, um, I suppose we should..."
Twilight tucked a bit of hair behind her ear and adjusted her glasses. "Right. Um, so did you want to ... or should I ... um..."
We were still trying to work out the logistics of how to handle the kiss when events overtook us.
We had only just started leaning towards one another when a massive crash echoed through the woods, and we both instinctively jerked back in surprise. I frowned, staring off into the distance and trying to find the source of the noise. "What was that?!"
"I don't know," Twilight answered. "But it sounded big."
Applejack stared out into the darkness. "If that was some kinda critter, it was a lot bigger than anythin' Ah ever heard. Fluttershy, can you...?"
Fluttershy nodded and took her little crystal necklace in hand. "Um, hello? Is anyone out there? If you're just a hungry bear or something, I don't mind sharing my food." After several more seconds she called out, "Um, excuse me, does anyone else know what that noise was? Sorry, please, not all at once ... okay ... okay." She sighed and shook her head. "None of the creatures know what's going on either."
Rainbow bolted to her feet. "I'll go check it out. If there's some sort of crazy monster or something out there, I'll kick its butt."
Cloud grabbed her wrist before she could start moving. "No running around the woods in the middle of the night all by yourself. That's just asking for trouble."
Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Not that I don't appreciate the concern, but I can handle being out in the big scary woods by myself."
Cloud frowned and crossed her arms over her chest. "And what happens if you trip over a root or run into one of those thorn vines when you're going sixty miles an hour, and we're all miles away from you?"
Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Cloud, you're being ridiculous. I'll be fine."
"She's got a point, Rainbow," Sparkler cut in, showing off the band-aids on her legs. "Those vines cut me up pretty good before I put on long pants, and I didn't do more than brush against 'em. If you run into them while you're super-speeding along, it'd probably be almost as bad as running into barbed wire."
"Think about it this way, Dash," Cloud continued. "We just heard a weird creepy noise out in the woods. One person wants to go out all by themselves, far away from where anyone can hear them or help if they're in trouble. If we were watching one of the Splattergoria movies, we'd be joking about how the person doing that was dead meat."
Rainbow grimaced and nodded. "Yeah, okay, you made your point. Though we all know if this was a horror movie, I'd be the hero who takes out the big bad monster and gets the girl."
Cloud glowered playfully at her. "If you're about to imply that I'd be the damsel in distress, I'll kick your butt so hard you'll wish you'd gone running off into the woods to investigate the spooky noises all by yourself."
"Leaving aside the debate about who would be the hero and who would be the damsel, perhaps we should all fall back to the cabin?" I suggested. "If there is some sort of wild animal or anything else out there, I would feel much safer if we had a solid wall between it and us."
Sunset nodded. "If it is just some sort of wild animal who smelled our food, a tent's not going to be enough to keep them out."
Rainbow groaned. "So we just coop ourselves up? How are we supposed to find out what's going on when we're stuck inside?"
Star raised a hand. "I can send F1X3R out for recon. Battery's good for almost 4 miles, plus it's got an LED light next to the camera."
"Now I wish I'd brought my drone too," Twilight sighed.
"One is still much better than none." I took a quick scan of the campsite. "Does anyone see a problem with hunkering down and letting the expendable stalker-drone do the scouting for us?" Star quickly grumbled something to me. "You spent that much on that thing?!" She scowled at me, and I sighed and massaged my temples. "Fine, fine. I have no idea why Mom and Dad let you spend ... ugh, never mind. Alright them, the only-slightly-more-expendable-than-us creeper-drone will go out and check the area while we hold down the fort."
Sunset started grabbing her belongings. "That seems like the best way to keep everyone safe while still finding out what's going on out there. Hopefully it's nothing, but I'd rather be safe than sorry."
Star planted herself in front of me, crossing her arms over her chest. "Need my phone back if I'm gonna be running F1X3R."
I sighed and handed it back. "Yes, yes. This is a bit bigger than a campfire game."
"Right." She turned it back on, then smirked at me while it was booting. "Though don't think you're off the hook for my dare just because there's a wild animal running around. Just putting it off for a bit."
I rolled my eyes. "That would be your top priority."
Thankfully we all managed to get back to the cabin without incident. By the time Star had her laptop out, F1X3R set up and ready to go, and her VR headset configured, I was starting to wonder if maybe we had all overreacted. After all, it could have just been a perfectly normal bit of forest noise we had all been panicked by. I was almost tempted to head back to the campsite, but at this point it seemed better to be safe than sorry.
Other than Twilight, Star, and Sunset working on setting up all the technology, the rest of us were stuck on the sidelines watching and waiting. Rainbow and Pinkie were standing sentinel at the windows while Cloud nervously paced back and forth. The others were busy working out sleeping arrangements for how we would fit eleven people in a single cabin as comfortably as possible.
Star donned her VR headset, holding the drone's controller in her hands. "Okay, connection looks good on my end." She hit a few buttons, checking that everything worked properly. "Control check is fine. Video showing up on the laptop too?"
"Looks like it," Sunset confirmed, enlarging the video feed to cover the whole screen.
"And I've got the satellite photos of the area," Twilight answered, holding up her phone. "Between that and the GPS tracker on your drone we shouldn't have too much trouble keeping track of where we are and where we're going."
"Good." She fired up the drone's rotors, smiling as it went airborne. I opened the front door, and she carefully eased it out before sending it up into the sky. "In hindsight, really wish I'd picked up that night vision upgrade. Not that getting a camera with 3x optical zoom and 4K resolution was a bad call either."
"What do you even need that much resolution and zoom for?" Sparkler asked, showing unusual reasonableness in questioning her fellow brat. A second later she backpedaled. "You know what, I'm probably happier not knowing. Long as it helps us figure out what's going on, I'll just be grateful for your flagrant disregard for privacy."
Star shrugged. "Not like I've got it breaking into people's houses or anything. I checked the law, everything F1X3R is designed to do is perfectly legal. At least, long as I don't take it into restricted airspace or anything, and Mom cleared it up the one time I sent it too close to base."
"Pity," I murmured. "I had such high hopes that would end with Star in a military prison for years, or at least booted off to reform school."
I couldn't see Star's facial expression with the VR headset on, so instead she just said, "Sparks, do me a favor and flip Storm off for me?" Sparkler obliged her fellow brat. "Thanks."
Pinkie let out a loud gasp and stumbled back from her perch. "Hey everyone! I can see someone else in the window!"
"That's your reflection, Pinkie," Rainbow deadpanned.
Pinkie let out a frustrated groan. "It's not my reflection, Dashie. There's someone else out there! They were all weird and green!"
Everyone else scrambled over the window, trying to spot Pinkie's mysterious interloper. There was nothing out but darkness and trees ... though it was a fairly dark night that made it hard to see deep into the forest. Perhaps whoever Pinkie spotted had already slipped off into the safety of the trees. They could be standing ten meters away and we would not have a clue.
Applejack frowned down at her. "Pinkie, if this was one of your jokes or flights of fancy..."
"It's not!" Pinkie snapped. "If it was a joke it would've been funny! What's funny about scaring everyone when we're already really nervous?" She paused, then amended, "Well okay, maybe it would've been funny if I did a really goofy monster roar or something, but that's completely different."
"Settle down," Sunset chided both of them. "The last thing we need right now is to start sniping at each other."
"Well said," Rarity agreed. "I know we're all a bit stressed and on edge right now, but fighting with each other will just distract us when we need to stay focused."
I stepped up to window to get a closer look, but saw nothing. Perhaps Pinkie was just jumping at shadows? Considering how nervous we all were it would not be a surprise. The green person she thought she saw could easily have just been some of the foliage shifting in the wind combined with an active imagination and quite a bit of fear.
I was about to dismiss the sighting as nothing when I spotted a flash of orange out of the corner of my eye. I slowly opened the window so I could get a better look at what lay directly beneath it. What I found put a new spin on things. "I found our missing gas can."
Applejack stuck her head out next to mine. "Well Ah'll be..." She frowned down at it. "Ah sure as hay didn't put it there, and Ah can't imagine why any of y'all would move it here." She leaned halfway out the window to get a closer look. "And them vines are awful grown up around it when it couldn't have been there for more'n a couple hours."
"The green lady probably put it there!" Pinkie concluded.
"If she even exists," Rainbow grumbled under her breath.
Before that debate could reignite Star interrupted everyone. "Son of a ... well I just found out what that huge noise was. There's a downed tree blocking the road out. No, two--three of 'em! No way we're getting past that without some heavy equipment."
I did not like the sound of that at all. "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action."
Cloud grimaced and nodded. "So we've got freaky stuff going on, and now three trees just so happen to fall in way that blocks the only way out of here? That sure looks like somebody's gunning for us, especially when next we've got a missing can of gas turning up right next to the house we're all staying in. If a bad guy set the house on fire while the only road in or out was blocked off..."
Everyone grimaced at where that line of thought lead. However, Twilight quickly brought up a counter-argument. "No one could have just chopped down all those trees without us noticing, right?"
Applejack frowned and shook her head. "Trees that thick don't just fall down on their own in calm weather, especially not three of 'em all perfectly placed to block the road. But she's got a point--we would've heard a chainsaw, and doin' that kinda work with an axe in the dark would've taken a while."
Star brought her drone around to get a closer look at the fallen trees. "They weren't cut down--they've still got their roots attached."
"So what knocked them down?" Rainbow asked. "Don't tell me we've got some sort of evil tree monster or something. 'Cause if this turns into Evil Dead, I am so outta here."
"We are a bunch of teenagers all alone in a cabin in the woods," Sparkler agreed.
"Let's not panic," Sunset ordered. "There's no evidence the trees came down by foul play. I'll call for help getting the road cleared. Star, keeping checking the area, and everyone else keep your eyes and ears open and your power crystals on you." She glanced my way. "Um, if you don't have any magic..."
"I will check if Dad and Uncle Tor left their hunting rifles here," I finished for her. "It might be overreacting, but I would rather be ready for whatever comes." |
Oncoming Storm: What Lurks Beyond | Things Get Groovy | I sighed and turned off my phone. "I managed to get through to the local sheriff, but they will not send anyone until the morning."
Sunset scowled. "Why are they taking their time?"
I shrugged. "They were not inclined to wake everyone up in the middle of the night, and dealing with that many fallen trees would likely require chainsaws and heavy equipment which they prefer not to operate in the dark. They are not willing to treat it as an emergency when we do not have any proof that it was anything other than a normal treefall and we have more than enough supplies to make it until morning."
"Right." She sighed and sank down on the couch. "If we told them the whole story they'd probably think we're just a bunch of high-strung nervous city girls jumping at shadows. And everyone's parents are hours away; they probably wouldn't get here until morning anyway. Looks like we're on our own, so let's concentrate on taking care of ourselves for now."
"Assuming there's anything to worry about." Twilight frowned out the window. "I mean, how much has actually happened? Trees fall down all the time without foul play being involved, and the gas can getting moved could have just been a matter of someone getting it out of the way while we were all working and forgetting they'd moved it."
"Three trees falling all at once isn't normal," Sunset pointed out.
"It could have been a domino effect with how close together the three of them are," Twilight countered. "Or it could just be someone playing a practical joke on us." Her eyes flicked over to Rainbow and Pinkie, then Star and Sparkler.
Sunset shook her head. "This is a bit elaborate for any of us to set up, and I think if it was some sort of joke whoever was doing it would've come clean before we called the cops and broke the guns out. Rainbow and Pinkie know a prank is only funny if everyone's laughing."
"Star and Sparkler know their limits too," I confirmed. "Especially when most of you do not know them very well. A really mean-spirited prank that has people genuinely upset is not the sort of impression they want to make." I grimaced out the window. "There is still no sign of any danger. If there was some hostile force, I think it would have followed up on downing the trees by now."
"Unless whoever's doing this is just waiting for us to relax and let our guard down." Sunset tapped a pen against her lips. "I just ... call it a hunch, sixth sense, instinct, whatever you want--I think we've got another magical threat on our hands."
Star spoke up, sounding kind of oddly distant due to being focused on her VR headset. "Already got F1X3R checking everything in its range. Even without the night vision upgrade I should be able to spot anything weird. I'll need to start pulling it back in twenty minutes for a fresh battery, so we might want to have someone watching the windows after that."
"Better to be safe than sorry," I agreed. "We can do some more investigating in the morning while the authorities clear the road. Running around the woods at night would make us far too vulnerable to an enemy, and adds dozens of other dangers completely unrelated to anyone who might be threatening us."
"It wouldn't be that dangerous if we all have flashlights and stick together," Sunset countered. "I know it's still a risk, but I really don't like the idea of us just sitting in here blind while anything could be going on out there. I want to do something."
Twilight sighed. "If there is magic involved, there's no reason to think that our flashlights would keep working. Normally our magic doesn't interfere with technology, but there are plenty of precedents in folklore for the two not getting along."
"And the forest at night can be very disorienting," I pointed out. "Sound travels oddly, and trees would break up the illumination from our flashlights. Even if we plan to be careful and stick together, you all know about the saying that no plan survives contact with the enemy. We have a safe base here, and I see nothing we could gain by looking around that would outweigh the risks of leaving it."
Sunset sighed and flopped back on the couch, crossing her arms beneath her breasts. "I know, I know. I just hate being cooped up in here waiting. We've got a problem, and I feel like I need to get out there and do something about it." She groaned and got off the sofa, pacing over to her bags. "Might as well burn off some energy while I'm this pent up."
I was a bit surprised when she pulled a sword out of her duffel bag, drawing it from the scabbard. I had known she was in the fencing club with Cloud, but having an actual sword was a step up from that. "Is that an old cavalry saber?"
"Yup." Sunset gave it a quick flourish. "Picked it up at the army surplus store for pretty cheap. I would've loved to get something a bit heavier like a falchion or a kriegsmesser, but those aren't exactly on the discount rack."
Star twitched, probably wanting to do an internet search to find out exactly how much it would cost to buy one of those swords. Thankfully, the drone kept her too occupied to bother with such things. As Sunset did a few quick practice moves with the sword to keep herself occupied, Twilight stretched out to take up the couch space she'd abandoned. "I'm fine with staying here until morning. If there's anything out there in the dark, I'd rather the drone spot it."
"Drones are better at spotting things than people anyway," Star murmured. "At least, until people learn how to fly and everyone carries a camera with 3x optical zoom and 4k resolution." She went silent for a long moment. "Admittedly, the flying part of it can be handled by magic, if half of what I've heard happened at the Friendship Games is true."
"A lot of it is," Twilight confirmed. "Having wings sprout out of my back was weird."
The image of Twilight Sparkle with wings was a curious one. After studying her for several seconds, I decided they would likely suit her. If nothing else, she was attractive enough that new appendages could hardly detract from her beauty. Not that she possessed the sort of classical beauty of the sort one would hear immortalized in poem or see in a statue; her glasses were too thick, her hair was in a simple ponytail rather than immaculately styled, and she hadn't bothered with more than the most perfunctory cosmetics. I suppose if one were being technical she was more cute than properly beautiful, though her bookishness and tendency to be just a touch awkward leant her an approachable air that many true beauties lacked. In fact--
My phone buzzing tore me from those idle contemplations. I picked it up and discovered a new text from Star. Stop undressing her with your eyes, Skunky. It's creepy.
I scowled and set my phone aside. "I am doing no such thing, and you are in no position to accuse anyone else of being creepy." I crossed my arms over my chest and did my best to glare at her. "Should you not be focusing on the drone?"
"Multitasking." A hint of a smirk showed up on her lips. "Long word, multiple syllables. If you don't know what it means I can show you how to look it up."
"I know where you sleep," I groused. If not for her being in the middle of some rather important work, I might have done more than just grumble a mostly idle threat. As it was, the matter quickly faded from my mind when I spotted something on the drone's video feed. "Is that the house the loggers use whenever they are working in the area? I did not know F1X3R had that much range."
"It doesn't with the stock battery and transmitter," Star answered with a proud grin. "But what's the point of limiting myself to stock components? Sparks even got Blossom to do a bit of custom work on it."
Sunset frowned at the building. "Check it out. If there is anyone messing with us, an unoccupied building within hiking distance would be a perfect hideout."
"What I would do," Star murmured. I refrained from commenting on the fact that she had put thought into how to creepily stalk people. "Definitely getting that night-vision camera soon as I have a bit more cash saved up." She sent the drone circling around the shack, pausing when she got to a window. "You guys seeing this?"
"A broken window," I confirmed. "And those vines growing through it look extremely thick, considering the building was occupied a week ago."
Twilight frowned at the scene. "If the window only broke in the last week, there's no way the vines would be that thick already. And I can't imagine the loggers would have just left it hanging wide open and uncovered if it broke while they were there."
"They would have at least taped some cardboard over it or something," I agreed.
Sunset broke off her sword practice to take a closer look. "I'm getting a strong magic vibe here."
"And these aren't just little creepers either," Star pointed out. "Place looks like it's been abandoned for years. Doesn't make any sense, unless Poison Ivy just moved in." She moved the drone up to the broken window, getting a look inside. "Crap."
Twilight grimaced. "That can't be blood, can it?"
I leaned in to get a better look at the screen. There were several dark reddish-brown stains on the broken glass, and what looked like a handprint on one of the walls. There might have been more on the floor, but it was made of darker material that made it even harder to tell what the smeared substance might be.
Star shrugged and announced the same conclusion I had reached. "Hard to tell for sure. It's dark, and even a zoomed-in camera can only tell me it's dried up dark reddish-brown stuff. Context sure makes it look like blood, but for all we know it maybe someone spilled ketchup and didn't clean it up. Not to mention that with the window wide open some wild animal could have decided to check the place out and cut itself on the broken glass."
"Possibly," I agreed. "But even if it does ultimately turn out to be something harmless, I think we can all agree that for the moment we should assume the worst."
Sunset sighed. "If past experience is anything to go by, we've rarely been wrong doing that when weird stuff that looks like it could be dangerous magic starts happening."
"Super." Star grimaced as she moved her drone around to get more footage. "I don't care what's causing this, I just want to be nice and safely away from it. Maybe you guys are used to dealing with all these crazy magical shenanigans, but everything I've heard about it makes it sound way too dangerous to mess around with. Especially for us normies."
"It's pretty dangerous for us too," Twilight murmured, hugging herself as she worried at her lower lip. "I mean, a lot of the wild bits of Equestrian magic we run into want to feed off our powers to get even stronger."
I stepped over to her side and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Do not worry, I will not let anything happen to you."
"Oh." Twilight's cheeks lit up as she looked at me. "Um, thanks."
I removed my hand, feeling a touch self-conscious about the fact that I had been touching her so casually. It might be seen as overly familiar, and Star would doubtless try to tease me about it later. "In light of this, I think we should sleep in shifts and have some sort of guard posted for the rest of the night."
"Probably a good idea to make sure at least one of the people with magic is up," Sunset agreed. "No offense Storm, but if there is a magical threat you and Star might not able to do much."
"Perhaps not," I conceded. "But I will not assume that until I confirm that whatever we are dealing with is immune to bullets."
Twilight Sparkle wrote up the watch schedule for the rest of the night. That left me a touch confused and curious when I began my shift and found out that my watch partner was Twilight herself. Given that she was the one who made the schedule it struck me as unlikely that the two of us had been paired up by coincidence.
However, now was hardly the time to allow myself to be distracted by this ... whatever was developing between us. We were on watch duty, and that took precedence over minor personal matters. I took up the hunting rifle Cloud had left behind and thoroughly checked it over. Not that I doubted my cousin's diligence, but one of the first rules was to always check your weapon.
Twilight shot a nervous smile my way as I worked. "You know how to use that?"
I nodded. "Yes." Our family picked their hunting rifles with all the care one would expect of a military family. I dimly recalled Mom and Uncle Tor debating the merits of the .306 and .308 back when they first set up the hunting cabin. Though Mom would likely be annoyed to hear I had gone against her wishes in the matter, I had opted to take Uncle Tor's .306 instead of her .308. Star needed the lower recoil a bit more than I did. In either case, a bolt-action rifle with a four-shot magazine and one more in the pipe would do just fine for seeing off anything that cared about being shot.
Twilight chuckled nervously and ran a hand through her hair. "Right, your whole family's in the military. I guess you grew up around this stuff."
"I did," I confirmed. "If anything, my sister and I are unusual because Mom and Dad are both in rear-area positions. They practice enough to keep certified, but a psychologist and a chaplain are not exactly on par with Aunt Nimbus. Though perhaps that is for the best, as Aunt Nimbus' preference for bow hunting cost us a good rifle for Sparkler."
"Right." Twilight frowned to herself. "Well if three guns and all of our magical powers aren't enough to handle whatever's going, we're in so much trouble that I doubt a fourth one would make a difference."
"Point," I conceded. With that matter settled, I ventured for a little small talk to pass the time. "Your brother is in the army as well, right?
Twilight nodded. "He's a lieutenant, yeah." She smiled fondly, relaxing back against the couch. "He's always wanted to go into the army, or be a cop. Something where he could help protect other people."
"It sounds like you are very proud of him," I commented.
"Of course," Twilight answered. "What he does is really important."
A dry smile tugged at my lips. "Well, nice to know you approve of my planned profession."
"I would be pretty unappreciative if I didn't," Twilight answered. "I mean, you're doing it for the same reason he is, right? To protect people?"
"Yes, that and family tradition." The mention of family tradition brought an obvious question to mind. "Do you plan to go into the service alongside him?"
Twilight sighed and shook her head. "I wasn't planning on it, no. Even before all the crazy magic stuff happened, army stuff just really doesn't sound like what's right for me. I mean, I like books, not guns." She sighed and took her glasses off, wiping the lenses. "Though to be honest, I'm not sure what I'm going to be doing. I mean, with my grades I'll probably get into a really nice college and get a degree, but past that..." She shrugged helplessly. "And that's assuming I can still have a kind of normal job and future with everything else going on."
"It is quite a lot to deal with," I agreed. "And really, there is nothing wrong with taking your time considering your options before committing to anything."
"Exactly." She shot me a hint of a sheepish grin. "Though last time I tried to make a checklist of all my options it wound up getting so long it was a bit unwieldy."
"I can imagine." Smart, talented, and attractive ladies like her would have no shortage of options. "May I ask you a question?"
Twilight shrugged. "Sure, go ahead."
I took a deep breath. "Why did you leave Crystal Prep?"
Twilight's cautiously friendly smile faded into an uncomfortable grimace. "I didn't really feel like I belonged there. I mean, no one really seemed to want me around other than Cadance, and maybe Cinch when she saw a way to take advantage of me. Most days everyone just ignored me, and the one or two times I tried to socialize..."
I took a deep breath. "I wanted you around." My cheeks warmed up a bit. "That is to say, I was ... I never really knew you then, but there were times I thought I should reach out to you."
"Oh." She sighed and brought one arm across her chest to rub the other. "Let me guess, you didn't ever talk to me because you were worried about how everyone would look at you if you were hanging out with weird, nerdy, awkward Twilight."
I winced at the tone, and the light her words cast me in. "I would not put it that way." In all honesty I had never had much concern for the various school cliques. The junior cadets were already a rather insular group on account of our more martial bent, and only a few like Fleur had really managed to integrate well into the rest of the student body. However, that made the fact that I had never approached Twilight all the more damning. I shrugged helplessly. "I suppose a good opportunity just never arose." Even as I said it, I realized what a poor excuse that was.
Twilight didn't seem to think less of me for the answer. Instead she slumped back on the couch. "Right, maybe that. It's not like I was making it easy by high school. After getting through elementary and middle I'd just gotten used to being off in my own world with my books, ignoring everyone else." She let out a frustrated groan. "I mean, what was I supposed to do? It's not like I was completely antisocial or anything: I tried to make friends! It just never worked out. The friends I made during elementary either moved away like Moondancer or wound up going to a different school like Minuette and Lyra. Once they went to a new school they had new friends, and even though we tried to keep in touch it wasn't easy when we had nothing new to bond over. I tried to make new friends, but either we had nothing in common, or we didn't get along, or they had better friends they actually wanted to hang out with." She buried her face in her hands. "I guess I eventually just gave up and resigned myself to the idea of not really having friends. If you'd ever tried to talk to me I probably would've just ignored you and kept my nose buried in whatever book I was reading."
"That still seems a poor excuse for me to not even make the effort." I grimaced and tried to think of a good way to explain my actions. "I suppose I always told myself I would do it next week, and there was no rush. After all, you were in a class above mine and did not look like you wanted anyone to talk to you. And then before I knew it I had run out of time entirely. If I wanted to get to know you better, I should have." I cleared my throat. "I cannot change the past, but now seems like a good time to at least move forward as I should have long ago. Would you like to be friends?"
Twilight bit her lip. "If you want to. I mean, it's not like we'll get a whole lot of opportunities to hang out when we go to different schools now."
"Ah." My eyes fell to the floor as I suddenly felt very foolish. Of course she would not be interested now that she had moved on to a new school and found new friends.
Twilight groaned and slapped her forehead. "Sorry, I'm ... not always good at this type of thing. Sunset's trying to work with me on the whole social skills thing. You know, making friends. And talking with people. Or carrying on conversations. Or not making everything awkward. Or ... I think I'll just shut up now." She took a deep breath. "Okay, what I meant to say is that of course I'd like to be friends, even if we don't get to spend as much time together as I will with the friends I go to school with."
I smiled and got up, walking over to her and extending my hand. "Shall we make it official, then?"
"Sure." She started to stand up to shake my hand, but either I had misjudged how close I was standing to the couch or she leaned a bit too far forward. Either way, the effect was that she wound up headbutting me in the chin. I staggered at the unexpected impact as my teeth clacked together, and Twilight instinctively tried to help steady me. However, the grab wound up compromising my balance instead of saving it, and it was all I could manage to make sure we both fell down onto the couch instead of the hard wooden floor.
After a few moments of disorientation I managed to grasp our new situation. I was reclining flat on my back on the couch with Twilight Sparkle on top of me, and her face mere inches away from mine. Her arms were still wrapped around me, and my own seem to have reciprocated the gesture to keep her from falling onto the floor.
Our respective positions were somewhat awkward. "Are you alright?"
"Fine." Twilight chuckled sheepishly. "I should be asking you that. I'm the one who headbutted you while trying to shake your hand. Sorry."
"It is fine." Seemingly of their own accord, my hands shifted to the small of her back, resting there in something far more intimate than holding onto her to make sure she did not fall onto the floor and hurt herself.
Judging by the way a hint of pink slowly crept into her cheeks, Twilight was fully aware of what my hands were doing. "I should ... probably get off of you." She let out an incredibly forced laugh. "You know, since I clumsily fell on top of you in the first place. Not that there's anything wrong with you. Or this. Just, um..." She shifted to side a bit, making both of us a bit more comfortable, and her own hands mimicked mine. "We're just together, the two of us. Getting along, with this nice--thing we've got going on. Friendly, you holding me." She leaned in a bit, resting her cheek on my shoulder. "Things being a bit scary. This being pretty nice..."
"Yes, this..." I swallowed a nervous lump in my throat. "You do not need to get up if you do not wish to. In fact ... I would like it if stayed exactly where you are, presuming you do not feel the need to leave."
Twilight looked up at me, nervously licking her lips. "I'm not in a huge rush."
I felt the heat rising in my own cheeks. "Good."
Twilight started to lean a bit closer, even as her own cheeks lit up. I was a bit stunned when she suddenly blurted out. "I don't like girls!" That hung in the air for a long, awkward moment. "I mean, I do, obviously. All of my best friends are girls. Except for Shining, and he's kind of different because he's also my big brother. I call him my BBBFF, Big Brother Best Friend Forever. Or there's Spike, but he's a dog so he really doesn't count. So the point is that I like girls, but I don't like girls. I think. Or at least, I thought. Now I don't know what I'm thinking! I'm sorry, this doesn't make any sense, does it? It doesn't even make any sense to me, and I'm the one who's saying it, how could it possibly make sense to you? All I know is that yesterday I never would've thought of kissing another girl, and now I'm kind of wishing we hadn't gotten interrupted before we went through with that silly dare Star put us up to."
I stared at her for several seconds as I slowly untangled everything she had just said. "Oh."
"Yeah." She groaned and started to pull away from me. "And after listening to all of that you probably think I'm some sort of weirdo and don't want anything more to do with me."
I kept my hold on her before she could get too far away."No, it is ... I think I understand how you feel, and I don't think you're weird or want you to go away."
Twilight blinked, a shy smile slowly spreading across her lips. "You used a contraction again. Two of them, actually. Isn't that supposed to mean something?"
"That does seem to be a common theory," I conceded.
Twilight leaned a little bit closer. "Well, um, you probably noticed I really like science. And, well, in science one of the important things to do is to, uh, test a hypothesis to see if holds up. So, if, well, we could um, do that. Test the hypothesis. If you'd like."
I was about to answer her when I heard a strange crunching noise. My eyes flicked to the side, and I spotted something most unexpected.
Pinkie Pie. Sitting in one of the comfortable chairs with a bowl full of popcorn. She shoveled another handful of it into her mouth, then smiled and waved at us.
Twilight spotted her and let out a startled yelp, bolting back away from me. "Pinkie! What are you doing?!"
"Whaaat?" Pinkie rolled her eyes. "I gotta start my guarding shift in half an hour, and I was kinda snacky so I made some popcorn, and now I'm eating it." She stared at us for a long moment, then added, "If you're mad 'cause I didn't make any for you, then you can un-mad yourself, 'cause I don't mind sharing."
Twilight closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm good, Pinkie."
"What about you, Stormy?" Pinkie asked. "You don't mind if I call you Stormy, do you?"
"I do not mind, and I do not want any popcorn, though thank you for offering." I rose to my feet and coughed. "I think I will go get a soda." My eyes flicked over to Twilight. "Would you like anything as long as I am up?"
"If you don't mind," Twilight murmured, not quite looking at me. "There should be plenty of the strawberry-flavored soda left."
"I will get you one, then."
Twilight shot a tense smile my way. "Thanks."
"I'll go with you!" Pinkie volunteered. "All that popcorn made me super-thirsty." Once the two of us were alone in the kitchen she shut the door behind herself. "Sooo ... Twilight's super-nice, isn't she?"
Ah. Had she come here to discuss what she had seen? Considering I still could not make heads or tails of exactly what had almost happened between myself and her, that would make for an awkward discussion. "Er ... yes, she is."
Pinkie's normal bubbly smiled faded away as she frowned at me. "Buuut she's not very experienced. And really sensitive. Almost as much as Fluttershy is, probably because she's still getting used to having lots of friends. Soooo, since her cute big bro isn't here to say this kinda thing, I'll just point out that I have magical powers that can make explosions, and I really don't like it when my friends get hurt."
Well, that was not the turn I had expected this conversation to take. "So noted."
"Great!" Her usual perky smile was back in place a moment later, and she got one of Twilight's strawberry sodas from the fridge along with a cherry one for me. "Here you go. Oh, and you two might wanna wait until you're off watch duty to finish up your little experiment. Not trying to be a party pooper, but you're kinda supposed to keeping watch out for bad guys, not just watching each other."
"I will bear that in mind." I could hardly disagree with her that our minds had very much not been on keeping an eye out for possible threats. "However, for the moment I think everything is al--"
As if summoned by my words and a sense of dramatic irony, a massive vine came crashing through the windows.
Twilight stumbled back with a startled shriek, while Pinkie Pie's eyes shot open and she spat out the soda she'd been in the middle of drinking. "This is diet cola! Ew, come on!" She cocked her head to the side. "Oh, and also, there are a bunch of crazy murder vines coming after us."
I rushed in and wrapped an arm around Twilight's waist, pulling her away to safety. I also snatched up the rifle, though a second after arming myself I realized I did not have the best weapon for the situation. I quickly shoved Twilight behind me to keep her safe, then took a shot at the nearest vine. The bullet left a satisfyingly large hole, but did little to stop the vine itself.
"What are those?!" Twilight gasped.
"I dunno what they are, but what about the others?!" Pinkie shouted. "Especially Rarity, they'll interrupt her beauty sleep!"
I stomped down on a vine that was trying to wrap itself around Twilight's ankle. "They will have to take care of themselves for the moment." It sounded a touch heartless, but we already had our hands full dealing with the threat right in front of us.
"I guess this supports the theory that this is magic!" Twilight's hands lit up as she telekinetically grabbed the sofa and dropped it on the vine, pinning it down far more effectively than my foot could ever hope to manage.
"I got it!" Pinkie grabbed one of the cushions and held onto it until it started glowing. Then she chucked it at the vine, where it exploded and reduced the encroaching plant to a mass of green pulp. "Yes! Score one for the Pinkinator!"
Three more vines every bit as thick as the first burst through the window. I put two more shots into one of them and managed to place them close enough to each other to cripple the vine's progress, but that was only one third of the job done. The other two vines shot straight past me, aiming at Twilight. She snagged them with her magic, trying to hold them back, but judging by her clenched teeth and the sweat beading on her brow it was not an easy task.
I took advantage of the restraint to put two more point blank shots into the plant, but it did not seem to do enough damage to stop even one of the two vines, and now I was out of ammo. There was no time to reload, so I had to resort to less sophisticated methods, swinging the gun and slamming the butt against the damaged section to try and finish what the bullets started. Unsurprisingly, blunt force was not terribly effective at cutting vines.
"Pinkie!" Twilight called out. "Break them as I hold them!"
"Sure thing! Get clear, Stormy!" As soon as I removed myself from the blast area Pinkie tossed another one of her exploding cushions, pulping both of the vines. As before, the destruction only seemed to draw more of them in. It almost felt like we were up against a hydra; for every vine we destroyed, two more came rushing in.
I tried to grab another one of the vines, but it was too strong for me to do much more than slow it down a little bit. Then the thorns along the vine cut into my skin, and despite my best efforts to hold on it slipped out of my grasp, barreling towards a seemingly defenseless Twilight Sparkle.
An orange blur shot past me as Applejack tackled the vine, using her magically enhanced strength to do what I could not and force the vines back. "Ain't no crazy plants gonna hurt mah friends long as Ah'm here!" She wrestled the vine and pinned it to the ground, then pulled out her pocket knife. "Ain't no self-respectin' farmgirl goes without a knife, 'cept when it ain't allowed!" Normally the pocket knife wouldn't have been enough to carve through a thick vine, but with Applejack's magical muscles behind it she made short work of the plant.
"I'll tie them up!" Twilight called out. "You two get rid of them!"
"Sure thing!" Pinkie pulled off one of her socks and chucked it at the vines, where it promptly exploded like a hand grenade. "Hope they stop coming soon, 'cause I've only got one more sock left and after that..." She sighed. "I gotta start carrying stuff for exploding when bad guys come after us. Just not a deck of cards, or I'd get sued."
I found a few pieces of debris to toss Pinkie's way for extra ammunition, but as I did so I realized something: while the other three were fighting desperately to hold off the attacking plantlife, none of them had even come close to me. Even when I had tried to wrestle them down or attacked them they hadn't really fought back. They had just carried on towards their true targets. "Why are the vines ignoring me?"
"It must be because you don't have any magic!" Twilight called out. "It's the most obvious thing separating you from us."
Applejack snarled and tore one of the vines in half. "Gotta be some way we can use that to--" She yelped as a vine snagged her by the ankle and pulled her off her feet. Several more vines immediately shot out for her other ankle and wrist. "Git offa me you dadgum--" She snarled and managed to free her limbs a few times, but she could not seem to fully shake off the vines.
Pinkie's eyes widened. "Twilight! Runaway Apple!"
Twilight snarled and threw more magic at the vines, and while she did a good job of holding them at bay for the moment it didn't move us any close to stopping them. I frowned and glanced down at the one vine I'd successfully disabled with my gun, or the ones Applejack had destroyed with main strength. They'd both stayed down, and they were about the only vines that seemed to still be dead. Between that and the fact that they seemed drawn towards magic users...
"Take THIS!" Pinkie snarled and threw one of her shoes at the mass of vines near Applejack, blowing them to pieces and showering her with plant gunk. She sighed, slumping down and wiping sweat off her brow. "Twilight ... I'm running out of things to throw! Especially when I don't wanna risk blowing up AJ too!"
"I'm trying to get her loose," Twilight grunted. "But if I pull any harder it could end up hurting her instead of the vines!"
"Well someone get me outta here 'fore this turns into somethin' outta one of them Neighponese cartoons!" Applejack snarled and thrashed against the vines, but by now they'd hauled her up into the air where she had no leverage to resist them.
Clearly it was time for radical action. I rushed over to the window and dove out through it, right past all the encroaching vines. I heard Twilight's panicked voice call out after me. "Storm!"
Just as I'd hoped, the vines completely ignored me as I rushed past them. The worst I suffered was a few more scratches from passing too close to them. It was a blind spot I intended to make the plants pay for. I sprinted to the tool shed and threw the door open. My first instinct was to grab a machete, but then I spotted a somewhat more absurd but undoubtedly more effective option. Considering the madness of the entire situation, I saw no reason not to go along with things at this point. I armed myself and said the only thing I possibly could under the present circumstances. "Groovy."
I revved up the chainsaw and charged towards the mass of vines breaking through the living room window. The window formed a natural chokepoint they all had to go through, thankfully one they hadn't managed to widen yet. The chainsaw did exactly what it was designed to, carving straight through the thick mass of plant matter like a knife through butter and splattering me with all manner of severed plant bits and sap in the process.
After what felt like several minutes but could not have been more than a few seconds I'd carved through all the vines, leaving behind a mass of severed stumps. The still-living sections of the vines writhed about like they were in pain, but I was not about to give them the chance to recover. I set the saw aside and grabbed the gas can from beneath the window, splashing the contents all over them. While I was doing that, I kicked some of the vines out of the window. "Someone help me set them on fire!"
A second later a glowing can of diet cola came flying out the window, landing right next to the vines. It promptly exploded, igniting the fuel and setting the vines ablaze. For a moment I could swear I heard the plants screaming, and the burning vines snaked their back into the forest, writing about in pain as they withdrew.
While Applejack snarled and pulled the last of the vines off herself and Pinkie cleared the window of the remaining vines to help me get back in, Twilight slumped down on what was left of the couch. "Is... is that all of them?"
Pinkie frowned and looked over my shoulder, where the burning vines were still barely visible as they fled deeper into the forest. "I think they're gone for now, but..."
"Whatever our enemy is, I fear we only wounded it," I finished for her as I climbed back through the window. "This is likely only a respite before it returns."
"Storm!" Twilight rushed and wrapped her arms around me. "What were you thinking?! You scared me to death when you jumped out the window into the middle of all those crazy vines! Are you okay?!"
"I am fine," I assured her. "And there was no danger, the vines were all ignoring me."
"They'd been ignoring you so far," Twilight countered. "Jumping right into the middle of them wasn't a smart way to test the hypothesis!" She pulled back from me and frowned, giving me a quick once-over. "And you're not fine at all, you've got cuts on your arms from that crazy stunt! We need to find a first aid kit."
"Hmm?" I glanced down at the scratches on my arms from my attempt to wrestle with the vines, and likely a few more I had picked up over the course of the battle. None of them seemed particularly deep, and with all the adrenaline in my system I had all but forgotten about them. For a moment I was tempted to brush off her concerns, but that was likely not a wise course of action. Untreated open wounds were not a good thing to have under the circumstances.
Before we could worry about that Sunset came rushing into the living room, her saber out and all but covered in plant matter. "You guys okay?! I tried to get to you to help out, but we had our hands full upstairs."
"We're okay," Twilight assured her. "Well, I mean, we're scared, shaken up, and Storm's hurt and needs a first aid kit, but we're all alive and intact. Is everyone else okay?"
Applejack's eyes shot wide open. "Rares! Is Rarity okay?!"
"And Star?" I asked. "Cloud and Sparkler?"
Sunset held up her free hand to forestall any further questions. "Everyone's fine. Rarity's shields were actually a huge help in holding them off and letting me and Cloud take them apart while Rainbow ran interference."
Applejack let out a relieved sigh. "Okay, good..."
"Indeed." It was an immense relief to know Cloud was alright. And Star and Sparkler. Even if they were brats who frequently made it their mission in life to inflict suffering on me, they were family. That last was more important than all other considerations.
"I think we need a team huddle." Pinkie clapped her hands and shouted. "Team huddle guys!"
The others all joined us in the living room, most looking a bit worse for the wear. Fluttershy managed to find our first aid kit and would have seen to the cuts and scrapes on my arms if Twilight had not insisted on taking over for her. She might have regretted volunteering, considering she had to clean all the plant gunk off my arms before she could even start applying disinfectant and bandaging my wounds.
Once I was wrapped up she shot a nervous smile my way. "So, that was pretty scary." She glanced around the torn apart living room completely covered in exploded plant matter. "And very messy."
Pinkie chuckled sheepishly. "Guilty as charged. Magical explosion powers are pretty good at stopping baddies, but they do kinda make a mess."
"I think we can all agree that this is better than the alternative," I said. "And if anyone asks, we can just blame the damage entirely on the plant monster."
"Let's just hope your parents' home insurance covers attacks by magical plants," Sunset murmured. "But let's not get too relaxed just yet, this was probably just the start of it all."
I frowned and nodded. "Those vines were only interested in the people with powers, and they tried to drag Applejack off. That makes me think they were just proxies."
Sunset grimaced and nodded. "A lot of the bad guys we've run into seem interested in stealing our magic or at least using us as a power source. Looks like whoever's behind the killer plants is trying to do the same thing."
"So what are we supposed to do about it?" Rainbow grumbled. "We gotta find them to stop 'em, and that's gonna involve running off into the forest in the middle of the night with no clue where to go or what we're looking for."
"But staying here and waiting for another monster attack isn't an option either," Sunset pointed out. "If we surrender the initiative it'll let whoever's behind this just wear us down. Considering how many of those vines there were, they're probably pretty expendable. Help might be coming in the morning, but even if we hold out that long I doubt the local road-clearing crew is going to be able to handle an attack by plant monsters."
"Not to mention the bad guy is probably going to take out our cars if it turns into a siege," Cloud pointed out. "Not that I love the idea of running away and leaving the killer plant monster free to do whatever it wants, but I'd rather fall back for now and come back loaded for war."
Star nodded. "Already found a place that sells herbicide in bulk about an hour away from here. Under the circumstances, I think we wanna pick it up by the gallon." She shot a look my way. "Maybe get a couple more chainsaws too, since the guns weren't working so hot for anyone but Cloud."
"Exploding fire bullets did give me a bit of an edge," my cousin conceded.
Rainbow turned to me. "Did you really use a chainsaw against the plant monster? 'Cause that is seriously awesome. Please tell me you remembered to say something cool right before you started chopping it up."
"I went with 'groovy.'" I shrugged. "We are a bunch of teenagers in a cabin in the woods being attacked by an evil tree, and respecting the classics seemed like the best choice."
Rainbow grinned like a kid in a candy store. "Cloud, when did your cousin get this awesome?" She smirked a bumped her hip. "You better up your game, or I'm gonna start thinking I hooked up with the wrong Kicker."
Cloud rolled her eyes and punched Rainbow in the shoulder. "Focus, Dash. Less jokes, more getting serious about the big bad evil thing trying to eat us."
"So what is our plan?" I asked. "I might be able to follow the vines back to the source considering they were rather large and on fire, but tracking anything at night is an uncertain proposition. We can use F1X3R for an advance scout, but there is only so much we can do with it, especially if we're going to be out in the field."
"Yeah, it's not ideal," Sunset agreed. "But staying here and waiting for the next attack isn't an option either. Fluttershy, can your animals do some scouting for us as well?"
"I'll ask," she murmured.
"Alright then," Sunset cracked her knuckles. "Let's go on a monster hunt."
Twilight sighed. "I had a feeling you would be saying that."
Pinkie frowned and tapped her chin. "I'm gonna need to stock up on ammo. Maybe steal some gravel from the driveway? Or use up the rest of the diet soda."
Sparkler raised a hand. "Speaking of ammo, I don't suppose Cloud's in the mood to share the magic bullets around?"
Cloud sighed and shook her head. "Tried that back when we were testing my powers. They only work if I'm the one pulling the trigger."
"Dammit." Sparkler sighed and shook her head. "So, uh, any volunteers for magic-ing me and Star up? Because without some sort of powers we're pretty much dead weight when it comes to dealing with evil plant monsters. I spent most of the fight just reloading for Cloud. So, I figure Twi'll be up for giving Storm magic powers and Rainbow's off-limits, which leaves..."
Sunset sighed and rolled her eyes. "For the last time, that was only a working theory about how Cloud got her powers, and even if it's right it was probably due to Rainbow's magic being in flux while we were at Camp Everfree. Not to mention I'm pretty sure there needs to be an emotional connection as part of the process as well, not just the physical side of it. Even if the theory that magic can be transferred via intimacy is right, what you're shooting for wouldn't work. So let's just focus on dealing with the bad guy."
"Right." I took a deep breath. "So if we are going hunting for the source of all this trouble, how will we know what to look for?"
Sunset grimaced. "I've got a sinking feeling that we'll know it when we see it." |
Oncoming Storm: What Lurks Beyond | Bad Vibrations | After a few minutes to take stock and rearm ourselves, we headed out into the woods to confront our mysterious enemy.
Much to Rainbow's disappointment, I had abandoned the chainsaw for something a bit less dramatic, specifically a pair of machetes that would still be practical for cutting through brush. While using a chainsaw against living plants was less ridiculous than many of the other uses for it, chainsaws were still not really balanced or designed to be used in battle. The only reason I had gotten away with using one earlier was that the plants had all been stuck in a chokepoint, and I could hardly count on that happening again in the open woods.
Star frowned down at her phone and sighed. "Satellite photos aren't helping as much as I'd like. With F1X3R recharging we have to use Fluttershy's animals for scouting, and squirrels can't read map coordinates or use a GPS to give me latitude and longitude."
"I know, we have to use old-fashioned fieldcraft and skills to navigate instead of just typing everything into a phone and letting it do all the hard work." I shot a deadpan look her way. "The unimaginable horror. It is almost like our training included these skills for a reason."
Star rolled her eyes. "Sure, and next we'll be smacking things with stone clubs and going 'Ooga booga.' Luddite."
"Tech-addict." I checked the edge of both of my machetes. Not quite as keen as I would have liked, but it was not as if I had the time to spend a few hours honing them to a perfect razor edge. They would at least be sharp enough to do the job.
Star frowned at me. "Should be packing something with a bit more reach."
I sighed and shook my head. "You saw how useless bullets were against those vines. There is no point in bringing a ranged weapon if it is going to be completely ineffective."
Star grimaced and did a quick check of her own hunting rifle. "Getting up close and personal isn't a great choice either." She nodded at the bandages on my arms, then to Twilight. "I will kick your butt so hard if you're trying to be a big hero to impress her."
I snorted. "As if you were capable of kicking my butt."
Star frowned up at me, doubtless irked by the fact that I was taller and in better shape than her. Then she played her trump card. "KnightRanger32."
"What?"
"Your password for all your social media." Star smirked at me. "Easy to figure it out, and you really shouldn't use the same password for all of your accounts. Makes it get easy to get into all of your stuff. Maybe I can't kick your butt in meatspace, but if you get yourself hurt being a big stupid skunk hero I will destroy you in cyberspace. You'll be a meme, a trending hashtag, and whatever other nasty ideas I can come up with. And you know me well enough to realize just how creative I can get."
"Brat," I grumbled, halfheartedly swatting at her.
"Ah, sibling love." Sparkler flopped against the wall next to us, smirking. "Best expressed through teasing, threats, and mockery." She picked up her rifle and joined Star in checking it over. "Thanks for arming me up, Storm. I was afraid I'd be stuck with the dinky little plinking rifle. Still don't get why we only have three hunting rifles when there's four parents who come up here to hunt."
"Aunt Nimbus prefers to chase the deer down and kill them with her bare hands," I deadpanned.
Sparkler stared at me for a few seconds. "Okay, normally I'd be sure that's BS, buuut I can't rule out that Mom could do that if she really wanted to."
"It's usually more of an ambush than chasing them down," Star murmured, for once backing me up instead of undermining me. "Climbs up a tree and waits for one to walk underneath her, then she drops on its back and snaps its neck."
"Riiight." Sparkler closed the bolt, then took a deep breath. "Wish she was here. Just saying, we could use a super-badass SpecForce soldier right now. And..." She growled and shook her head, wiping at her eyes. "Dammit, I'm not some little kid who needs mommy to hug me and tell me everything's gonna be okay and the monsters won't get me."
Star wrapped an arm around her. "How about a cool cousin saying it?"
Sparkler let out a breath and returned the hug. "Yeah, that's fine. Especially when I can say it right back to her."
"Indeed so." I smiled and joined in on the group hug. "Remember, Star: as a big sister I am obligated to crush you beneath my heel, but I will also utterly destroy anyone else who tries to do that to you. Even if you are a creepy stalker who hacks into my internet."
Star rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, love you too, Skunky. I'll show you how to set up a better password once we make it outta this, set you up with a password manager or something."
"So you can install a backdoor into my computer?" A second later I realized the flaw in my logic. "But you can already get in there anyway."
"Same principle as the big sis rule," Star murmured. "Nobody hacks you but me."
I rolled my eyes. "Lovely to see such family solidarity." I cleared my throat and focused back on the more important matters at hand. "Use guns if you want, but I would advise a backup cutting weapon. Bullets did not seem especially effective against the vines, and I am sure you recall the old saying about how a knife never runs out of ammunition. The first attack already put a considerable dent in our stores."
Star sighed and nodded. "So we're going medieval. Fine, what do we have available?"
Rainbow must have overheard the question, because she shouted over, "Come on, someone has to use the chainsaw!"
I shook my head. "Not the most practical choice, especially after I used all our spare gas to set the plants on fire. That said, considering we came to clear brush in the first place the two you should be spoiled for choice."
Sparkler nodded. "We've got machetes, milspec K-BARs with saw-tooth serrations, and I think there's a kukri around here somewhere."
Star shrugged. "I'll take a machete then. Spent half the afternoon swinging one around, I'm pretty used to it by now."
"Your call." Sparkler spent a minute digging through our supply bag until she found the kukri. "I like this one, blame Mom's SpecForce roots. It's like the perfect balance between a hatchet and a knife. So..." She took a deep breath and tried to hide the tremble that went down her spine behind a snarky grin. "Now that we've all equipped our chosen phallic symbols, we good to go?"
"As ready as we can be," I murmured.
Cloud came over before we could get moving. The frown on her face gave me a pretty good idea what she was going to say before she opened her mouth. "Hey, Sparks. You sure you want to ... I mean, might be better to stay back at the cabin where it's safe."
Sparkler rolled her eyes. "Nah, I'm good. I mean, m'probably safer than you, since nobody took me up on my offer to make some magic. You sure you're good?"
"Yeah, 'course." Cloud took a deep breath. "It's just that it might be safer if you hang back. I mean, considering you don't have any ... we're a bit better equipped. Just saying, I don't want anything happening to you, so hang back and keep outta the ugly stuff." She nodded to myself and Star. "Same goes for you two. This is a big old magic duel thing, so play it safe and don't try to be Batman in the Justice League."
"Right, we don't have billion dollar armor and a bunch of fanboy writers who'll let us shrug off punches from guys who should turn us into a thin red mist with a single shot." Sparkler went quiet for a minute, then grabbed her sister in a tight hug. "You don't have super-durability either, just some fancy magic gun stuff. Stay safe, okay?"
Cloud returned the hug. "Will do."
Sparkler smirked and poked her shoulder. "Just remember, if anything happens to you I'm telling Mom, and then she's gonna come and kick your ass and mine."
Cloud snorted and rolled her eyes. "Sounds like what she'd do, yeah. Don't worry, I'll keep your ass safe so Mom can kick it." She marched off to rejoin the others.
Sparkler's confident grin faded as she stared at her sister's back. "Alright, let's find out who's messing with us and teach them why you don't piss of the Kickers."
"If we can, yeah." Star sighed and frowned down at the ground. "Seems like Cloud doesn't think we'll be able to do all that much. Probably right. I mean, us using guns isn't accomplishing anything more than burning through ammo she could be boosting up with magic, and that just leaves us flailing around with hunks of sharp metal like we're still in the stone age."
Sparkler frowned and shook her head. "No way. Even if we can't do all the cool stuff, they're gonna need someone watching their backs."
"Not to mention that the vines seemed so interested in the magic-users that they all but ignored us," I pointed out. "That was why I was able to sneak up on them with a chainsaw. Those are not normally noted as being a good weapon for stealth operations."
Star grimaced and nodded. "So the vines ignored us, either because it wants them for some reason or it sees them as the only real threat."
Sparkler shrugged. "If we're invisible to whatever's doing this, or even if it's just not paying attention to us because it only thinks the magic gang is worth worrying about, then gives us a big edge. Lot easier for us to hit them if they don't see us coming."
"The vines ignored us," Star pointed out. "No guarantee that'll follow once we get to the big boss. Plants aren't all that smart when it comes to target selection."
"It is hard to say what we might encounter there," I agreed. "But we do at least know that we hold an advantage against the vines when they are blindly questing for a target. I intend to use that advantage for all it is worth and seek out any other we might find."
Sparkler nodded. "Dad always says that stacking up a bunch of little advantages is just as good as having one big one. Besides, I'm not sitting on the sidelines while Cloud goes running off to fight some crazy plant monster. Even if I can't help as much as someone with super speed or magical shields, I can do something."
Star sighed. "Yeah, I know. Just..." She grimaced and waved down at her phone. "Bit outta my element for this kinda thing. Cloud's the best shot even before she had magic, and Skunky's way better at all this outdoor stuff. I'm the tech-head, and it's not like I can hack the crazy evil plant monster's phone or something."
I gripped her shoulder. "You are a Kicker. Even if you are not quite as physically fit or combat trained as I am on account of too much time in the basement creeping on everyone online, you are hardly a slouch. Now buck up, or else once we get out of this I will challenge you to a sparring match in front of the entire family. And beat you. Utterly. While everyone else watches. And then I will post it on the internet."
Star stared at me for a second, then snorted and managed a faint smile. "You beat me? Never happen, and messing with me on the internet? Now you're really overreaching, Skunky." She brushed my hand off. "Alright, pep talk over. Let's go be an awesome military family."
We fell in with the rest of the group. I helped take the lead along with Rainbow and Sunset, trying to apply the fieldcraft lessons I had gotten in junior cadets. Sparkler joined Cloud at the rear of the group, helping her watch everyone else's backs while also watching hers. Star was in the middle, her phone out as she did her best to pull up satellite photos of the area to help us navigate.
Thankfully we had an easy trail to follow. Foot-thick massive vines that had also been on fire thanks to my contribution to the fight left a great many signs of their passage. Between our own fieldcraft and Fluttershy's animal scouts we had a fairly easy time finding our way. The problem was what we would find when we got there.
"So here we are, going deeper and deeper into the monster's lair, closer to the source of its power," Star murmured to nobody in particular. "Why do I feel like I should start calling up a bunch of Admiral Ackbar memes?"
I rolled my eyes and pressed on. The treetops seemed to close in on us as we moved deeper into the wild woods, blocking out the light of the stars and all but hiding the moon. The darkness seemed to press in around, amplifying even the most innocuous sounds. When Applejack stepped on a fallen twig, the snap sounded so loud I almost mistook it for a gunshot. I tensed up every time one of Fluttershy's animals stirred in the underbrush, imagining that it might be the vines coming in for a another attack.
After what felt like an eternity but my watch insisted was only half an hour, the terrain started to shift. It took a bit to realize what exactly was different: we had crossed from the land around our cabin to the rest of the woods, the timber company's property. Judging by the number of stumps and scattered branches, they had cut many of their own trees along with the ones taken from our property. Small surprise, as long as they had all their employees and equipment in the area.
These trees thinned and soon vanished, freeing us from the confines of the forest itself but leaving something equally eerie to replace it. The massive number of tree stumps and detritus littering the ground made it feel as if we were walking through some sort of arboreal graveyard. Though having a clear line of sight should have been an advantage, as we moved forward I felt more uneasy. If hostiles came for us now we had no cover, and while we would be able to see them coming the same applied to them seeing us.
As we moved forward, a dark shape slowly took focus ahead of us. Once we were finally close enough to get a good look at it in the darkness I realized it was an especially massive oak tree, large enough that it had to have been the tallest tree in the forest before the loggers came in. I was surprised they had not cut it down, but as I approached the reason it remained standing became horrifyingly clear. Several wrecked chainsaws and broken axes littered the ground near it, and large masses hung off the trees branches like especially large fruits. Human-sized fruits.
Sunset let out a sound halfway between a sigh and a groan. "I told you we'd know what we were looking for when we found it."
Several seconds of silence followed, broken only by the flash of Star's camera as she snapped several pictures with her phone. "Whoa."
"That just ain't normal." Applejack rushed up to the nearest plant-wrapped humans to get a closer look at it, turning it a bit to reveal what had to be one of the lumberjacks. She gave him a quick once-over. "Looks like he's still breathin', just real outta it."
"That is a relief." I frowned as I considered our options. "We should free them, but I imagine attempting to do so will provoke a response."
"I'm counting on it." Sunset drew her old saber and walked up to the nearest of the captured men, drawing her blade back to cut him free.
A second before she struck, a vine wrapped itself about her wrist. The tree groaned and a section around the trunk seemed to almost split open like a doorway. A second later a figure walked out from the opening. She had green skin that had a rough texture to it, almost like tree bark, and there were leaves laced through her red dreadlocks. When she spoke her voice sounded surprisingly laid-back and relaxed. "Clear your auras of this violence."
Rainbow was the first one to break the silence. "So it is Poison Ivy!" She shrugged at everyone else's incredulous stares. "What? She's got green skin, red hair, plant control powers, and she went after a bunch of guys for cutting down trees."
"She is so getting sued after we rainbow-blast her," Pinkie agreed.
Fluttershy stared at the newcomer for several seconds, frowning to herself. Then her eyes snapped open in shock. "Treesie?! Is that you?"
The strange woman smiled placidly. "Flutters my girl, it's a pleasure on this journey to see you again." She turned to the rest of us. "I'm Tree Hugger, radical to meet you all. Your vibes are some of the coolest I've ever seen." She turned back to Fluttershy, a strange light entering her eyes and her smile shifting just a touch. "I can finally hear Mother Earth's call, Flutters. Can you hear it too?"
Fluttershy shuffled and couldn't quite meet her eyes. "Um ... well, kind of, since I can talk to animals. But why are you doing this, Tree Hugger? What happened to you?"
"Mother Earth blessed me," Tree Hugger stretched her arms over her head and let out an almost ecstatic-sounding sigh. "When the cutters tried to destroy this beautiful tree, I chained myself to it to stop them. That's when the earth itself blessed me with the power to end her destruction." She spread her arms out, encompassing the entire forest. "The world's out of harmony, girl. We've broken it, beaten it, sold it, and ground it into something pretty for ourselves. We're trading away the world's natural beauty for concrete and plastic mazes where we see the light of computer and TV screens more than the sun."
While that did sound like a fairly accurate description of Star, I was not about to concede to this Tree Hugger's point. "So how does that extend to trapping these lumberjacks inside of a tree?"
"It's all about restoring the balance," Tree Hugger answered with a truly disturbing level of calmness. "They hurt the earth with the cutting and burning, so now their auras are being aligned with nature to cure the damage they caused. I know it's kinda harsh, but we have to help fix Gaia before its chakra get so polluted we can't reverse the damage."
Sunset grunted and transferred her sword to her free hand, then chopped the vine holding her. "Yeah yeah, we get it. I'm all for protecting the environment, but don't you think kidnapping people and draining their life is going about a thousand steps too far?!"
"It's not very nice, Tree Hugger," Fluttershy chided.
"Neither is destroying the earth," Tree Hugger shot back. "If someone comes into your house and wrecks it, you ask them to fix the damage. Well the planet is everyone's house, and I'm just helping these cutters fix all the trees they destroyed."
Applejack frowned at her. "Don't they plant a new tree for every one they cut down? Ah thought most of the companies did that, just good business."
"Planting a couple little saplings doesn't make up for all the destruction they've caused," Tree Hugger shot back. "Just like having a baby doesn't make up for committing murder. Besides, do you know how long it takes for a tree to grow this tall?" She waved back at the massive oak that she had apparently been staying in. "That's why I'm keeping the cutters here. I just need to align their auras and open their chakras a bit, and the vibes will help the new trees grow a hundred times faster."
Fluttershy frowned and shook her head. "Treesie, you're holding them prisoner to drain their life force to regrow trees. Don't you realize how wrong that is?"
"Oh, it's all groovy," Tree Hugger answered airily. "The whole process is organic and natural. It's way healthier than all the processed food they normally eat. Besides, the earth mother's song is saying it's the right thing to do. Can't you hear her song, Flutters?"
"Someone's been taking a long ride on the crazy train to looneyville," Sparkler muttered under her breath.
"Equestrian magic does that to some folks," Cloud murmured back. "Something about all the power going into them when they're not ready to deal with it. It's part of why everyone was so cagey when I got powers."
Fluttershy continued trying to reason with her friend. "Why did you send vines to attack us?"
Tree Hugger blinked a couple times, seeming to need several seconds to actually process the question. "They weren't attacking you, they were just trying to bring you here so you could help. These cutters have weak auras, but yours burn bright like stars. I bet if you joined up with me we could fix the whole forest in just a few days instead of the months it'll take with these guys."
Rainbow snorted and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, think I'm gonna pass on getting locked up in your crazy death tree so it can drain our magic." She zipped over to one of the captured lumberjacks. "Now let all these guys go, or we're gonna make you let 'em go!"
"You guys really gotta stop harshing my mellow." Tree Hugger sighed and shook her head. "Don't worry, you'll all understand once our auras are in harmony." Vines erupted from the tree, shooting towards the others.
Fluttershy yelped in surprise as one of them snagged her waist and hauled her off her feet. "Tree Hugger! Let go of me right now!"
"Soon as everything's in balance," she answered calmly. "Though really, I think once I uncloud your chakras you'll realize I'm helping you expand your consciousness and you'll want to stick around. Just think of how many trees we could save working together! We're going to fix the world's balance by working together and usher in a new age of harmony between humans and nature."
Fluttershy struggled against the vines, and several birds flitted down from the sky to start pecking and tugging at them. "How is hurting us going to make anything balanced?
"I'm not hurting you," Tree Hugger answered placidly. "I'm expanding your mind and enlightening you. You might hurt yourself if you try to fight against it, but that's why you need to expand your mind to new experiences and perspectives. Once the tree's had you for a bit you'll understand, and you'll thank me."
Rarity slashed one of her diamond-shaped shields through the vine holding Fluttershy, dropping her to the forest floor. "That is not how you treat a lady!" She threw up another shield to block vines going after Twilight's back. "Stop this right now, or so help me..."
I spotted the threat in time to call out a warning to her, but there was no time for me to do anything else. I threw one of my machetes, but I might as well have been blowing against a hurricane. Rarity was so focused on defending her friends that she didn't even realize she was in danger until one of the vines wrapped around her leg and hauled her into the air. Rarity shrieked, one hand grabbing her skirt to hold it in place as she flipped upside down as the magic from her shields started draining away.
Applejack snarled and jumped up at the vines, intent on freeing Rarity. Several more vines intercepted her in mid-air, hoisting and suspending her once more. With no leverage and nothing to anchor herself against, Applejack's super-strength was far less effective, and despite her best efforts she could do nothing to free herself, let alone Rarity.
The rest of us closed ranks to try and protect each others backs, but Fluttershy tripped and fell on her way to us. Pinkie rushed out to help her, but that just let the vines snatch up both of them. Pinkie managed to make the first few vines who tried to grab her erupt in masses of sap and pulped plant matter, but the blast sent her flying back. She stumbled back to her feet, but her eyes looked a bit unfocused and she wasn't very steady. The next vines had no trouble hoisting her up, and without Pinkie protecting her Fluttershy stood no chance.
"The balance is already coming closer," Tree Hugger crooned. "Soon harmony will be restored and everything will be righteous."
"Tree Hugger!" Fluttershy called out in vain. "Stop this! There isn't anything balanced about what you're doing!"
Tree Hugger shrugged. "Deer are balanced by wolves, rats by snakes, even the shifting foundations of the world through earthquakes and eruptions. Balance doesn't play favorites, Fluttershy. It just is. If you'd just stop fighting, I'd be able to help you understand what I mean."
"Maybe we don't want to listen the crazy plant lady!" Rainbow snapped at her, rushing past us and jumping in between several vines so they would tie themselves up into a knot. "So what's the plan after you grab us? Turn into some super plant monster that rampages across the city doing the whole Gaia's Vengeance thing?"
"Mother Earth doesn't hold grudges," Tree Hugger smiled calmly. "Humans are the only ones capable of anger and hate." Several vines shot out at ground level, one of them managing to trip her up and kill her momentum. "Can't you hear her call? It's beautiful. You just need to open up your ears and listen with your heart."
"Gyah!" Rainbow yelped as she tripped, and vines hauled her away. "Lemme go, you crazy hippie lunatic!"
Cloud snarled and took aim at Tree Hugger. "Okay, I am done playing around sniping vines, eco-bitch. Either you let Rainbow go, or I swear..."
Tree Hugger cocked her head to the side and stared at Cloud. "Your aura is so weird right now. It's pink and black, love and hate mixed together. That's not how it's supposed to go. You need to clear out your chakras before that gets all toxic on you. Don't worry, Rainbow's fine, and soon you will be too."
A dozen vines interposed themselves between Cloud and Tree Hugger before my cousin could take her shot. The bullet did an impressively ludicrous amount of damage, punching a basketball sized hole though several of the vines, but that was nowhere near enough to penetrate the shield of plants. Pushing that much power into the old hunting rifle left the tip of the barrel glowing bright red and steaming, and when Cloud tried to work the bolt she withdrew her hand with a startled yelp. Just as well--if it was that hot, putting a new round into the chamber might have cooked it off.
Sunset stepped into the gap, swinging her sword to intercept the vines that went rushing in at Cloud. I would've stepped into help her, but a second later I realized I would just be getting in the way. Sunset's eyes were locked on Tree Hugger, and her strikes were lashing out to parry and counter the incoming vines before they even struck. It must have been magic.
However, even if she could use magic to anticipate the attacks she could only move so fast, and her sword could only be in one place at a time. The vines soon began slipping past her defenses as they came in from multiple angles at the same time. I would have moved up to support her, but with how fast her blade was flying I feared getting in her way.
Eventually one of Sunset's counters came in at a bad angle, and instead of carving through the vine her saber got stuck halfway through. An instant later the vine whipped backwards, yanking the trapped blade out of her hands. I tried to get over to her to hand off my machete, but the rest of the vines snatched her before I could get close enough. Without Sunset protecting her, Cloud got grabbed a second later.
We fell back again, myself, Star, and Sparkler forming a defensive triangle around Twilight. Sparkler brought up her gun and pointed it at Tree Hugger, but the barrel was shaking so much she dropped it a second later. "Mom and Dad could've put a cabin anywhere in the woods, and they had to pick the spot right next to Captain Planet's evil twin..." She grimaced and shook her head. "Storm, now'd be a great time to come up with a clever plan."
"We have guns," Star pointed out.
Twilight frowned. "The magic's what's pushing her to do all this. I mean, I can't imagine Fluttershy would normally be friends with a crazy ecoterrorist. Sunset always said the magic just makes you more of what you already are, so it probably pushed her from a peaceful advocate to ... this. She's not in her right mind."
"But we have to do something to stop her." I sighed and shook my head. "Even if she is not fully culpable for her actions, we cannot allow this to continue."
"Yeah, not letting her eat Cloud and everyone else." Star brought up her rifle, and unlike Sparkler the barrel was not shaking. "Give her one last chance?"
Tree Hugger brought all of her captured victims over to her. "You're all so ... harmonious. Your auras all congeal together like a kaleidoscope."
I took a deep breath. "Tree Hugger, let them go or we will shoot to kill." Warning her probably wasn't a good idea considering she could use the vines to intercept our bullets like she had with Cloud, but... "You have five seconds. Four. Three..."
Tree Hugger looked over at us. "Oh, missed one." The vines shot out at us, and while Twilight tried to force them back with her magic there were just too many coming in too fast. One of the vines wrapped around her waist and hauled her over to the others. "Flutters, do you hear something? It's like there's more, but Mother Earth's song is so loud, and yours on top of it..."
Seeing Twilight taken away removed the last vestiges of doubt. "Take the shot."
Star's rifle cracked, but right as she pulled the trigger she closed her eyes, and her aim drifted off just a touch to the side. Instead of hitting Tree Hugger directly, it just blew off one of her dreadlocks. The vines all froze in place, and Tree Hugger whipped around to face us. "Violent auras. Why didn't I see them sooner?"
"Oh crap." Sparkler brought her rifle up to snap off a shot of her own, but panic sent the bullet even wider than Star's.
The two of them started working the bolts, but I didn't think there would be enough time. I snatched up Sunset's sword in one hand and pulled out the machete in my other, then charged in. Perhaps not the best tactic on a personal level, but charging in with two blades held high would hopefully keep Tree Hugger focused on me instead of the two with guns.
It seemed to work, since Tree Hugger sent a dozen thick vines straight for me. Fortunately it seemed that whatever effect that made me invisible to them back at the cabin still applied to some extent; while she could still direct the vines to attack me, they seemed a bit clumsy and unfocused compared to the speed and power they'd possessed against Sunset and the others.
However, my plan quickly ran into a snag: closing in on Tree Hugger made Star and Sparkler hesitate even more than they already had been. Hard enough to consider shooting another human in the first place, and now they also had to worry about the risk of friendly fire on top of that. Perhaps I should have been touched they cared, but at the moment all I could think was that if they didn't shoot Tree Hugger regardless of the risks, none of us were likely to get out of this.
Cloud Kicker must have reached the same conclusion, and evidently Tree Hugger's efforts to stop me from closing in on her had taken her focus off holding onto her prisoners. "Star! Sparks! Get my hands free and help me aim!"
As the two of them started frantically hacking away at the vines holding my cousin, I closed in on Tree Hugger herself. I started to bring Sunset's saber to bear on the girl, but just before I would have struck I met her eyes for a fraction of a second. They were ... human. Tree Hugger might have been transformed by magic, but she was no monster. I quickly shifted my aim to smack her with the hilt instead.
The blow still staggered her and sent her to the ground, and I intended to keep her there. I dropped the blades and fell on Tree Hugger, trying to get both arms around her neck for a chokehold that would knock her out and end the fight.
Tree Hugger snarled and pushed off against the ground, making up for a lack of training with a surprising amount of muscle and sheer fury. While she couldn't have held me off forever, she did manage to keep me from placing my arms long enough to bring in a vine to slap me away. I hit the ground hard enough to send a painful jolt up my spine, while Tree Hugger stomped over to me, looking as close to angry as I had seen her in the entire fight. "What is wrong with all of you?! Have your chakras been clouded by the evils of this predatory world? Don't you realize I'm the righteous one?"
I groaned and glanced up, spotting something that Tree Hugger had missed. Cloud had both of her hands free, and with Star and Sparkler helping to keep the rifle steady she had a bead on Tree Hugger. "Good, bad, I'm the girl with the gun."
She pulled the trigger, and Tree Hugger went flying back like she'd been hit with a sledgehammer. The vines holding everyone instantly went limp, allowing us to free the others with almost no trouble. As soon as Rainbow was free she zipped over to Cloud, giving her a quick once-over before letting out a relieved sigh. Then she smirked and nudged Cloud in the ribs. "You gets points for using a Bruce Campbell line, but it doesn't feel quite as spontaneously awesome as when Storm did it."
As soon as she was free, Fluttershy rushed over to Tree Hugger's side. "Treesie! Are you okay?!" Tree Hugger answered with a surprisingly alive groan for someone who'd just been shot with a .306.
Cloud let out a relieved sigh. "Okay, so the nonlethal bullet spell works. I mean, all the tests we did said it would, but..."
"There is a substantial difference between testing it and actually shooting someone with one," I agreed. "How does it work?"
"Disperse the impact force," Cloud explained. "Spread the impact over a wider area, but without any more power behind it. So instead of putting holes in people it just sends them flying and leaves one hell of a bruise."
Tree Hugger groaned and slowly pulled herself up to a sitting position, struggling to stay even that upright. "Wuh ... whoo. Something feels out of harmony. These are some seriously bad vibes." She stared at everyone around her and blinked a few times. The vines around us started twitching back to life as their mistress recovered.
Sparkler's eyes widened. "She's not done! Shoot her again!"
"No!" Fluttershy rushed over to the rest of her friends. "Hurry, we need to get the magic out of her before she can stop us."
"Right." Sunset grabbed Twilight and Rainbow's hands, and the rest of them linked up. "Cover us, Cloud."
Before I could even ask what they planned to do, everything vanished in a blinding flash of rainbow light. |
Oncoming Storm: What Lurks Beyond | Epilogue | Nobody ever talks about the really boring, mundane part of fending off a monster attack: cleaning up the mess after the final battle. The sun had started coming up by the time we got back to the cabin, and we could clearly see just how much damage had been done. There was not a single intact window, the front door was barely still on its hinges, and the outside walls were a disaster. Not to mention just about every interior surface had splattered plant bits, and there were a bunch of bullet holes that would be very hard to explain to our parents.
"Whoa," the newest member of our group murmured. "Dude, your place got trashed."
"That's what happens when someone sends a bunch of crazy killer plants to try and drag us out of there to feed us to a tree," Rainbow grumbled.
"Oh, right." Tree Hugger blinked a few times. "My bad. I should probably, like, pay for the repairs or something." She sighed and shook her head. "So much for that nice eco-friendly hybrid I was saving for."
"It's not completely your fault, Treesie," Fluttershy reassured her. "Equestrian Magic can make you do things you'd never do under normal circumstances."
"Still bad karma," Tree Hugger answered. "Gotta balance the scales, Flutters. Shame the cutters bailed before I could figure out what to do to make it up to them, though I guess I can't blame 'em for wanting to get gone."
"You did hold them prisoner for several days while draining their life force to make trees grow faster," I agreed. "Not the best first impression."
We all split up to start with the cleanup and assessment. While a part of me was tempted to take Tree Hugger up on her offer to do all the work herself, that would take rather too long to be practical. It seemed proper to at least make the cabin somewhat habitable before we left, or at least make sure it would not get any worse before we could get it properly fixed. Installing new windows was a job best left to professionals.
I got a broom and dustpan and set to work sweeping up as much as the broken glass as I could. After a few minutes of work, Twilight joined me and started using her magic to levitate the larger pieces into the trash bin. After dumping a particularly large load she sighed and shook her head. "We came here to fix this place up, and now we're leaving it in even worse shape than when we got here."
I dropped a pan full of smaller glass pieces into the bin. "I think curing Tree Hugger from ... whatever that was constitutes helping on a far more important scale. If nothing else, had her magic raged out of control for much longer it likely would have caused far worse damage."
"Good point." She grimaced. "I just don't want you and Cloud to get in trouble for all of this. Most parents wouldn't believe we got attacked by magical monsters, and would just assume we wrecked the place as part of some wild out-of-control teenage party."
"Then it is a very good thing they are aware of Cloud's magical powers and some of the other events that have happened recently." I frowned as I thought about the implications of that. Despite the healthy layer of skepticism most people had about magic, incidents like this seemed to happening often and publicly enough that it was only a matter of time before someone noticed.
"That's good to hear, I think." Twilight sighed, and her shoulders slumped. "This was supposed to just be a nice relaxing weekend. Mom and Dad were really happy about me getting outside for a bit instead of spending so much time cooped up in my lab. Instead, it just turned into another random magical disaster."
"I suppose so." I thought it over for a moment, then shrugged. "Despite that, we did have plenty of fun before the attack of the killer tree."
"Yeah, I guess that's true." She chuckled softly, tucking a bit of hair back behind her ear. "Though I think the desperate life-or-death battle against a killer tree that wants to eat our magic is the kind of thing that overshadows the rest of the trip."
"It is likely to be the part that stands out the most in our memories," I conceded. "However, it need not be the only thing we take away from this. It was certainly nice to get to know Cloud's friends a bit better, and perhaps make some progress towards becoming friends with them myself." My eyes flicked over to her. "Assuming you have no objection to that."
"Um, right." She adjusted her glasses and smiled at me, a hint of a nervous blush on her cheeks. "That wasn't so bad, at all. Getting to know you. Even with the awkward running into and ... um ... other stuff."
I felt my own cheeks warming as well. "I am glad you think so."
Twilight coughed softly. "We could, you know, hang out later if you want. You could join up with me and my friends the next time we do something. Or, um, well we could go do something alone. Together. I mean, alone in that we wouldn't have everyone else around, but together in that it would be both of us there. But not together together. I mean, unless--that is--" She groaned and slapped her forehead. "Sorry, I swear I'm usually articulate enough to carry on an intelligent conversation."
"It is fine," I assured her. "And I think I would like that."
She let out a relieved sigh, then smiled at me. "Then let's plan on doing that."
"Very good." I took a moment to carefully consider my next words. "Would that be ... what exactly would you want from that?"
She hesitated, biting her lip. "Oh, um, right. You know, time together, hanging out with each other, and ... um ... well what was it you wanted from me? I mean, is it just fun time with a new friend or would we be..." She briefly averted her eyes, her cheeks lighting up against. "That is to say, um, did you just want to hang out as friends, or would you be interested in um, you know, maybe us being something else?"
"I..." I closed my eyes and tried to figure out what the answer to that was. When I could not come up with a quick and easy answer, I opted for just saying what was on my mind. "To be quite honest, I am not entirely certain. Had you asked me before this weekend, I never would have thought I would be interested in another girl in any context other than friendship. Now..." I shrugged helplessly. "The evidence that my feelings have evolved to something a touch more complicated is rather hard to refute."
"Oh." She took her glasses off and cleaned them with her shirt. "Yeah, that is a bit complicated. I mean, I never would have ... but I think I do. I guess? Maybe? Probably, I suppose. I mean, the preponderance of the evidence does suggest some level of physical attraction, and as far as our personalities are concerned you seem like a nice person I could see myself being compatible with. I can't really think of a compelling reason for us not to ... um, I mean if we both want to there's no harm in ... I guess we could call it experimenting?" She chuckled nervously. "Yes, let's call it an experiment. That way it sounds like science, which is way less complicated and scary than ... um ... this. So ... yeah, I think I'd like to do this experiment."
I nodded along. "Yes, I think I would like to at least investigate the possibility as well."
"So, um," She smiled up at me. "I guess that means we'd be going on a date? I mean, that is the commonly accepted term for two people hanging out together to either engage in romantic activity or explore whether or not they'd want to do so. Even if calling it that makes it sound really weird and scary."
"From what I have heard, it gets easier once one is accustomed to it." I took a deep breath. "And yes, I would like to do that."
"Great!" Twilight looked surprisingly relieved, as if she had been afraid I might reject her despite the course the conversation had taken. "So, um, when did you want to do that, and what should we do together?"
"We could always go see a movie or see a play," I suggested. Before I could think about when we might do so my phone buzzed, and I idly tapped it. I had meant to silence it, but either I hit the wrong button or whoever sent the message was an especially malicious and bratty tech-head who took twisted delight in tormenting me.
My phone promptly belted out an impressively loud song. "And IIIIIIIII will always love--" I jabbed at the mute button, but that only changed the song. "What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt--" I tried the volume buttons, but once more they did not work exactly as intended. "Never gonna give you up, never gonna--"
I snarled and opened up my phone to disconnect the battery. Twilight was blushing so brightly one might mistake her for an overripe tomato, and I suspected I looked much the same. I cleared my throat and did my best to regain my composure. "As far as timing is concerned, perhaps after I finish murdering my sister and burying her body in the woods?"
"Right." Twilight chuckled softly. "Want some help with that?"
"Yes." I smiled and gave her hand a quick squeeze. "If nothing else, it makes an excellent start to this grand endeavour." |
Revelation | pre | "Please, don't bow," she said kindly "now, what seems to be the trouble?"
"This vagrant is trying to board the train without paying." the conductor said, jabbing a hoof at Booker.
Twilight glanced between the conductor-pony and the bipeds.
"May they ride with us?" she asked.
"But- but are you sure you want him to be riding in the royal carriage with the rest of you?"
"I'm sure." she said with confidence.
Booker cocked an eyebrow, curious as to why the princess horse was getting him out of his mess. The conductor, none-too pleased, bowed, allowing the seven, as well as Booker and Anna passage onto the train. Booker followed the six mares, plus one scaled-thing he couldn't quite identify, through the train, and into one of the rear cars.
"What was that all about?" he finally asked, closing the door behind him.
The princess sat at one of the seats, a large box of books next to her.
"Just...a little payback for rescuing me from that crowd."
"Yeah...'rescued'..." Rainbow snorted.
Booker was actually speechless- not that he was expecting this sort of thing to happen, but it still came as a shock to him.
"Well...uh...thank you..." he murmured, sitting with Anna in the aisle across from where the seven were seated.
> A Warm Welcome
Booker snorted as he awoke, rubbing at his face as he tiredly sat up on the bench. He blearily took into account just where he was- but not before his head struck the overhead compartment above the seat. Wincing in pain, he realized it was dark outside the windows of the train car, a dark navy enveloping the landscape as pristine white stars dotted the skies.
"Ow! Damn it..." he grumbled, sitting up slowly this time as he rubbed his head.
As he did so, he realized that a certain little girl was missing from his immediate reach.
"Anna?!" he cried shooting up.
His heart raced as he was immediately silenced by the purple hybrid, her horn aglow as a book rested between her hooves, a pair of red, wire-framed glasses perched on her muzzle.
"Trouble sleeping, Mr. DeWitt?" Twilight asked, turning the page.
The car jumped, forcing the occupants to bounce a bit. Not that they noticed, all of them were asleep, save Twilight and himself.
"Where's Anna?" he asked, straight to the point.
Twilight nodded over her shoulder, towards the back of the car. Booker's head swiveled to the left, and found Anna dozing peacefully, sandwiched between the yellow pegasus and the purpleand green reptile. The former of which embracing his daughter with her wings, while Spike's head lay in Anna's lap, small as it was.
'How did she get over there?' he wondered.
The possibility that she wandered around while he was asleep crossed his mind.
The sight made his head ache, reminding him of the situation he was in.
'Stupid Booker, stupid.'
"So, tell me about yourself." Twilight said, another page turning.
"Heh, don't see why I should." Booker replied, reclining in his seat.
Twilight was nonplussed by his bluntness, and instead continued reading.
"I can tell you about me, then you can tell me about you, if you'd like."
"OCD, aren't you?"
The hybrid rolled her eyes as she sighed, the book closing.
"Why are you so bitter, Mr. DeWitt?" she asked simply.
"Why are you so annoying, Mrs. Sparkle?" he retorted.
"'Miss', not 'missus', I'm not married."
"Figured someone in your position would be."
Her purple face darkened, her muzzle reddening until it was almost completely scarlet.
'Didn't know horses could blush.' he thought.
"What makes you say that?" she asked, sounding more like the yellow one.
"Well you're a princess, aren't you? You must have stallions knockin' down your door."
Her face grew redder.
"Or, y'know, giant lizards, whatever floats your boat." Booker said, nodding to Spike.
"Now wait just a minute!" she shouted.
Rainbow groaned in distress, eliciting another round of sleepy groans from the rest of the group.
The princess shrank, and realized her error, a sheepish smile splitting her muzzle.
Booker cocked an eyebrow, confused at her behavior, shooting another glance to the sleeping, gecko-like creature beside Anna.
"That's why you keep him around, isn't it? As a consort?"
Twilight took a deep breath, her chest puffing out as she calmed herself.
"Yes, I love Spike," the princess said "but it's familial love, like with you and..."
"Anna." Booker said, filling the silence.
"Like you and Anna."
He nodded in understanding, taking a moment to rub his jaw as he met Twilight's gaze.
"Besides," she continued, after a short pause "I'm not much of a princess, I was just recently coronated- this was one of my first official duties as royalty."
"Wouldn't have guessed." Booker said, genuinely surprised.
"And just what's that supposed to mean?"
"It's obvious you have leadership skills," Booker stated "you just don't like ordering others."
"What gave you that idea?"
"What happened at the fair, for one thing."
Her ears flipped backwards, slapping against her skull as her head ducked low. She muttered out something about someone named Celestia.
"I'm going to get some more shut-eye," Booker groaned, reclining on the bench once more "wake me when we get to the next station."
Twilight nodded.
"The tear is closing! You've got to come through now!"
"I don't want to get caught in-between!"
"It's fine! You've got to hurry!"
"Fine? Are you mad?!"
"No! The tear is stable! You'll not get caught in-between, I promise!"
"If I get caught, it's going to be a very long time before we see each other again!"
"Hey, hey! The deal's off, you hear me? The deal's off!"
An aging man, a bundle in his arms, stepped through the ever-shifting hole in the wall.
Booker grabbed at the man, yanking his arm just as he stepped through.
"Shut it down! Shut down the machine!" the man shouted to the two behind him, appearing to be blackened shadows behind him.
"It's becoming unstable!"
"Shut it DOWN!" he roared, briefly yanking the fragile bundle in his arms towards himself.
Booker fought back, gritting his teeth as he tried to take back his daughter, crying out in distress as she was swiftly moved back and forth, her face tinged green.
"It's ready! You've got to pull her through!"
The man gave one final tug, pulling Anna through the anomaly.
"Give me back my daughter! NO!"
The portal closed, Anna disappearing from his life forever.
He numbly looked down, and didn't see his hands, as he'd expected.
Two stumps, that was it, most of his forearms missing.
Blood spurted from the appendages, splattering against the dirty cobblestone.
It landed wetly, dripping morbidly down the wall.
A cry of anguish escaped his lips, and he collapsed, his head striking the ground with such force that it too began to bleed.
He didn't care.
Anna was gone.
"Mr. DeWitt! Mr. DeWitt! Please," a voice sobbed, breaking him out of his sleep "please wake up, Anna's right- right here! She's perfectly f-fine!"
Booker's eyes shot open, finding himself to be in the train car. Quickly sitting up, he once again, struck his head on the baggage compartment above.
"Sonofabitch!" he shouted, holding his head.
"Daddy okay?" Anna asked, toddling up to him, grabbing his free arm.
Anna by his side, the pain in his head was quickly forgotten. Taking her hand into his, Booker sat up, mindful of the compartment.
"Daddy's fine, sweetie." he said, a small smile on his face.
Anna smiled, her small teeth showing.
"'kay."
She then went to embrace Fluttershy, much to the latter's surprise.
"Soft." Anna murmured into the pegasus' chest.
Fluttershy blushed, her muzzle tinged red as she hesitantly let a wing drape gently over the young girl.
"Anyway..." Booker muttered "who woke me up?"
"None of us did, Mr. DeWitt." Twilight responded, confusion evident on her features "You were having a nightmare, I was about to wake you, when you...erm..."
He nodded, standing. He checked his belongings, then followed the purple princess out of the train car, Anna and Fluttershy close behind.
'She'd better not get too attached to her...' he thought 'I can barely feed either of us, let alone a pony.'
Then again, these ponies could talk, and had trains, as well as fairs, whose to say they didn't have homes, as well? Entire cities- hell, and entire country of horses. It was like the cavalry all over again...except for the gunfire, and cannons, and wails of pain...
'Goddamn place is going to kill us...' he thought, stepping off the train.
The car let out a squeak as a result as a relief from his weight from it, as if groaning in exhaustion from having to carry him all the way here. Wherever here was, that is.
"Welcome to Ponyville!" the pink mare shouted, a party favor hanging from her mouth as she stood on her hind legs, her forehooves in the air. A wave of balloons and confetti literally fell out of nowhere, littering the station platform with the small bits.
'God damn it.' |
Revelation | Hooked On Ponyville | "Weeeellll?" Pinkie asked "Are you surprised? Are ya? Are ya?"
'Surprised is an understatement...' Booker thought to himself.
"...yeah, guess I am..." Booker stated, almost no excitement in his voice.
The pink mare squealed in glee, and zipped down the street, faster than anything he'd ever seen. He had no words- he could only wonder what kind of hellhole he'd stepped into by accepting this job.
"She always that hyperactive?" he asked.
"Don't let her fool you, she's smarter than she looks." Applejack stated as the group exited the train station.
"Not what I asked..." Booker grumbled as Anna squirmed in his grasp.
"Well, life's never borin' with Pinkie around."
"Heh, I'll bet."
The group fell silent as they walked into the small village, Anna's fussing the only thing breaking the silence.
"Hey Twi, why don't you ask Mr. DeWitt about his super-power?" Rainbow piped up.
'I swear to god, she's going to get it...not today, not tomorrow, but she will...'
The purple princess stopped, then turned to stare at the both of them.
"What? What do you mean, 'super-power'?" she asked, confusion on her features.
"It was so awesome! You should've been there!" the cyan mare gushed "The orthros had Anna in its clutches, then- then he lifted it into the air without even touching it!"
'Is it possible for her to say something and not exaggerate it?'
Twilight cocked a brow, glancing between Rainbow and himself.
"Yeah, I know- you'd think it's just magic; but get this, he doesn't have a horn! Isn't that awesome?!" she said, pointing a hoof at him.
The man in question took offense to being referred to like a science experiment, and spoke his piece.
"It's not-"
"It most certainly is!" Twilight all but shouted, shattering Booker's eardrums "Beings that can use magic without a horn are scarce in Equestria! A certain draconequus being the only one."
"Oh did I hear my name being called?" a disembodied voice echoed, making Booker jump.
A sudden white flash enveloped his vision, and something that could only be described as a creature straight out of of hell appeared before him. The mix-and-match creature was grinning like a madman, staring at him intently with its red pupils.
"What in the-"
"Hello," it said, baffling Booker "I'm Discord, master of Chaos and Disharmony."
The thing held out its only paw, confusing Booker.
"So..." Booker began "...you must be the one I file a complaint to."
A beat of silence, and the creature began to chuckle, then chortle, then devolved into all-out laughter. The thing howled as it rolled on its back.
"I say something funny?" Booker asked, unamused.
The thing's laughter died down, wiping a tear from the larger of its eyes.
"Well, it was funny to me." Discord said, looking around at the indignant looks he was recieving from the herd, save Fluttershy.
Discord then seized Booker's free hand, shaking it up and down rapidly.
"I can't tell you how refreshing it is to finally have another non-equine to talk to!" he said, grinning manically.
"Ahem," Twilight interuppted "we're right here, you know!"
Discord rolled his eyes, then disappeared in a flash. The demon-creature then reappeared in another flash beside Fluttershy.
"Oh, I'm well aware of that," Discord said, making the pegasus squeak as he picked her up "I find our little chats just so entertaining."
He rubbed his knuckles into the pegasus' flowing mane, making the pony in question blush heavily.
Booker rolled his eyes, and addressed Twilight; ignoring the strange creature's odd behavior.
"I need to go, where can I talk to someone about housing?"
"You'd need to go and talk to Mayor Mare, I suppose," she replied after awhile, not noticing the man's eye twitch "and there's always the message board at town hall."
"Huh...thanks..." Booker stated, glancing around at the crowd suddenly gathered around them "where would the town hall be?"
Twilight pointed down the street, to a tall, carousel-like building standing in the center of a circle of thatched-roof houses.
"Uh..." he began "...see ya around."
He turned on his heel, and began walking towards the town hall, leaving the six ponies, baby dragon, and draconequus in the street, along with the few ponies watching the group curiously.
"Hmmph, how rude," Rarity commented, brushing a lock of purple mane out of her eyes "though he did seem like quite a gentlecolt- and that cravat looks simply dashing on him! I'm not quite so sure about the rest of the ensemble though...perhaps he'd allow me..."
The unicorn blushed, discovering herself the focus of her closest friends.
"Well...I can't help it if his style intrigues me."
"That makes two of us..." Twilight grumbled, just loud enough for her friends to hear.
"Me three," Applejack stated "something about that fella don't sit right with me."
"I-I- think he was a very nice...um...whatever he is..."
"Ah ain't sayin' it was a bad feelin'," Applejack responded "it's like...ya bite into an apple, and it tastes like an orange."
"Ugh, I absolutely hate that." Discord chimed in, much to the palomino mare's annoyance "What? I do! It completely ruins my taste buds. I'd much rather taste plums than oranges."
"Anyway," Applejack continued "dignitary or not, I say we should just be on the look out."
"I don't think that would be enough." Twilight responded, rubbing her chin in thought.
"Whatever do you mean? He's a completely unknown species to us." Rarity stated.
"Exactly...which is why I think it'd be best if we get to know him- maybe if we find out why he does what he does, it'll explain any behavior he might have down the road."
"I don't know what you guys are so worked up about," Spike said, causing the mare's gazes to turn to him "I think he's alright- he's like a mix between a dragon and a pony."
"How do ya figure that?" Applejack asked, genuinely curious.
"Well...how do I explain this..."
The baby dragon began to pace back and forth, chewing at the tips of a claw.
"It's like...he's mean, like a dragon, but he only lets it show to ponies he doesn't like...and then it's like he's a totally different guy when he's around Anna."
"I suppose you have point, Spike." Rarity agreed, forcing a furious blush to work its way onto the dragon's features "I mean, not all ponies are...shall we say...civilized, as you and I."
"I think you're all just being silly." Discord stated with finality, disappearing.
"Good riddance..." Rainbow mumbled.
"Much as I hate to admit it, Discord does have a point- we could avoid a lot of trouble if we just get to know him."
The seven were unanimous in their decision.
Booker set Anna down as he approached the center of town, leading the small girl firmly by the hand.
"Well, this is it." he muttered to himself.
The message board was easy enough to find- it was just a simple bulletin board tacked to the side of the carousel-like building, right next to the set of double doors that led into it.
"Lodging...lodging..." he muttered to himself, looking up and down the assortment of papers stapled to the board.
"Bingo." he stated, finding a few papers requesting a room to rent.
Wanted: Roommate- must share bed, must pay half of utilities. No foals and/or pets.
~Blocky Bluff
'Well, that's out...'
Room for rent: must be clean, preferable if not loud or noisy.
~The Great and Powerful Trixie
'Damn it...'
Housemate requested.
Foals and pets accepted.
Utilities can be shared if possible.
~Ditzy Doo
'Simple enough,' he thought, ripping the paper off the board 'just need to go to...728 Haydrop Lane...'
He wanted to bash his head against a brick wall; maybe then he'd be put out of his misery. He plucked Anna off the ground, paper still in hand, and began to search for the address listed- the sooner he could settle in with whoever this Ditzy character was, the sooner he'd be able to figure out what he was supposed to do here. If he was lucky, he'd maybe even be able to find a steady-paying job; living paycheck to paycheck was risky enough as it was. |
Revelation | The Neighbors | Booker rapped on the wooden door before him, glancing down at his daughter before the door creaked open, a smiling, grey pony with wings on the other side. The horse's cross-eyed stare caught his attention immediately, and the brilliant gold coloring on its mane and tail right after.
"Er, I'm here to see about a living arrangement?" Booker asked, Anna attempting with all her might to hug the colorful pony.
The equine in question stared at him for a moment, the wonky eye shifting slightly as the pony smiled.
"Oh, of course!" she exclaimed "I'm so glad somepony decided to take up my offer! Please, come in!"
Booker eyed her as he entered the small building, holding onto Anna tightly as he did so. Taking notice of dozens of pictures lining the walls, he spied the cross-eyed mare with two other ponies- both of them being unicorns. One was a bit shorter than the gold-maned pegasus, donning a bright-pink coat, with a purple mane.
'How the hell does that work?' Booker wondered to himself 'Genetics are going to be a bitch to figure out...'
The other pony was considerably shorter than the other two, with the same coloring as the pegasus. Booker could just make out a small stump sticking out of its mane.
"So, what brings you to Ponyville?" 'Ditzy' asked cheerfully as she led him down the hall.
The pair entered a small living room, equipped with a three-person couch, a coffee table, and a love-seat against the far wall.
"Work." Booker responded curtly, wincing afterwards.
'Better learn to be a bit nicer around her,' the man thought as his head brushed against the low ceiling 'if she will be my future landlord.'
"I know how that goes..." the mare responded, her ears flipping to faintly slap against her skull.
Booker was surprised, seeing the pony be able to empathize with his...unique...situation. He resolved to get used to it, knowing he'd rather have a conversation with a pink pony than drunk and rowdy at the nearest saloon. Well, maybe he wouldn't go that far.
"Well," the mare began "The bathroom's down the hall, third door on the left, the guest...er...your...room is the second on the right. Mine is the second on the left."
"Good to know," Booker stated, rubbing his chin "anything else I need to know?"
"I've got a daughter, she's eight," Ditzy said "her name's Dinky, would you like to meet her?"
'Not really.'
"Of course."
The pegasus turned, trotting to the back of the house, leaving Booker and Anna alone in the small living room.
"Well, what do you think?" Booker asked rhetorically, looking down at his daughter as he did so.
"Pretty." Anna responded simply.
Booker face-palmed, grunting to himself as he readjusted the bag over his shoulder.
'Keep forgetting she's a kid...' he thought.
The blonde pegasus returned, the same, small unicorn from the pictures trailing behind her. She stopped dead in her tracks when spying Booker, making the man suddenly uncomfortable as he rubbed the back of his neck.
"Muffin," the mare began "this is...um...uh..."
"Booker."
"This is Booker, and his foal...um...er..."
"Anna."
"Anna! This is Booker and Anna; they'll be staying with us for a little while!"
The small unicorn scuffed her hoof on the floor as she stared downward, barely making any eye-contact with either Booker or Anna.
Ditzy looked at Booker, then at the unicorn, then back at Booker. A huge smile suddenly split her muzzle as she flitted into the air.
"Oh! I know! Muffin, why don't you go and play with Anna for a little bit? Mr. Booker and I can talk out here for a little while."
The unicorn hemmed and hawed, before finally relenting with her mother's decision. She motioned for Anna to follow her, though appearing to be as unenthusiastic as possible about it.
Anna looked up at him, pleading with him to let her go and play, like a normal child. Booker thought for a bit, then deemed it safe for his daughter to go, releasing her hand. The effect was immediate- Anna shot to the unicorn, making the latter rear back in surprise. The unicorn bolted down the hall, his daughter following her.
"Can I get you anything?" Ditzy asked "Water? Tea?"
"No, thank you," Booker said.
"Well come on in and sit down," the pegasus said, motioning to the couch "I'd really like to hear all about you."
'Shit...'
"I'm a...private investigator." Booker finally said.
"Ooh, that sounds exciting!" the cross-eyed pegasus exclaimed.
'More than you know...'
"Momma, I'm hungry." Dinky stated as she trotted into the room.
"Oh dear, is it that late?" Ditzy stated, surprised as she stared up at the clock on the opposite wall.
"No, Anna and I just wanted to have a snack." the filly stated.
Ditzy sighed in relief, and turned to Booker.
"If you'll excuse me..."
"No problem-" Booker said, standing.
The man bashed his skull against the ceiling.
'God dammit...' he moaned inwardly, rubbing his throbbing scalp.
"I'll help with whatever you need." Booker said, offering his assistance.
"No no, I insist!" she replied, her wings flitting "You're my guest!"
"Not for long," Booker responded "if we live here, we split everything."
'You're pushing it, Booker- you're not even living here yet.' he thought to himself, wondering is there were some way he could reverse what he'd just said.
"That's...that's so nice of you..." the mare said, almost too quietly to hear.
Booker cocked an eyebrow, and shrugged.
"Nothin' I wouldn't a' done." he said.
"Oh...well...there're some crackers in the cupboard in the kitchen, an-and some peanut butter!"
Booker waved, acknowledging that he'd heard her as he headed into the kitchen, Anna and the filly following.
'Since when the hell did I become a babysitter?' he thought, spying the filly following him.
He assumed he'd better get used to it, because he had a feeling that this entire pastel-colored world was out to get him. |
Revelation | Power Outage | Booker sat on the relatively small couch in Ditzy's living room, Anna on one side and Dinky on the other. The two children were currently fast asleep, having run off to dream land some time in that past few hours. Booker himself didn't quite remember what the three of them were doing, he remembered talking with Dinky, with the occasional input from Anna, and now the two of them were suddenly asleep. Ditzy trotted into the room, one eye watching the three of them, the other focused on the wall to the left of her, making her appear cross-eyed.
"It looks like my little muffin is getting acquainted with you and Anna." the pegasus giggled, trotting towards the couch.
Booker studied her face, shuddering briefly at the cross-eyed pegasus.
"What?" she inquired.
"Doesn't that...hurt?" Booker asked vaguely, gesturing to his face, knowing full-well that this wasn't the best way he could've worded the question.
"Sometimes, yeah," she replied, not seeming to be off-put at all by his phrasing "it used to hurt a lot worse when I was a filly."
Booker felt a twinge of guilt, having asked when he only knew the mare and her daughter for less that forty-eight hours. Booker adjusted himself, tempted to stand, but not wanting to disturb the positions of the sleeping children he was sandwiched between.
"My eyes really don't bother me all that much..." Ditzy said quietly.
Booker's eyes widened, realizing that the kind mare was angry at his question.
"H-How did you know I...?"
"S-Sometimes I can tell if somepony's lying...your facial expressions were a bit of a giveaway...but...your face is vaguely like a pony's...so...sorry if I offended you."
Booker sat in silence, staring at the pegasus, jaw agape. He then allowed a small smirk to spread across his face, directed at the backpedaling pony.
"We could've used someone like you on the force, back home."
Booker strolled casually down the street, away from Ditzy's house. To the casual observer, they might've said that he was out for a walk, heading in no particular direction. Colgate, however, was not a casual observer, as she watched him pass the window to her shop.
"Hey Cole?" her friend, Lyra, seated in the dentist char, her jaw hanging open "You mind finishing? I promised Bonnie I'd-"
"Uh-huh," the blue-coated pony replied absently "they're in the cupboard, Lyra."
"Seriously, I think the meds are starting to wear off-" Lyra stated "and I'd rather not have gaping holes in my teeth for my date."
Colegate shook her head, her two-toned mane bouncing over her eyes as she turned away from the window, and back to the task at hoof.
"I know you're obsessed with bipeds and everything-" Lyra began as Colegate pressed a hoof on the magic-powered box that sat on the floor, attached to the drill in her magic "but you really shouldn't get distracted from your work- more businesses go belly up that way."
"I'm not obsessed with bipeds," Colgate huffed, rolling her eyes "it's how they can walk on two legs that get me."
"I'm an accountant, not an anthropologist." Lyra replied.
"And a scientist, and a social worker, and a notary republic," Colgate chuckled, trying to make herself heard over the whine of the drill "how you manage all of that, I'll never know."
"Living next door to Pinkie Pie helps." Lyra said, trying to giggle herself, but was stopped by the drill in her mouth.
"I'll bet, for a mare who you'd think eats so much sugar, she's never had a cavity, as long as I've known her."
"It takes all kinds..." Lyra stated.
Colgate nodded in agreement, shooting a glance out the front door of her shop.
"He's not going to come in, you know," Lyra stated, trying to keep Colgate's attention while she had a sharp, rotating piece of metal in her mouth "even if he did, there's no telling when he would."
"How do you know it's a 'he'?" Colgate asked suspiciously.
"His foal calls him 'Daddy', what conclusion would you draw from that?"
"Oh, he has a foal...a single parent, how brave..." she whispered to herself dreamily.
"Can you just finish my teeth? I really need to get going." Lyra said impatiently.
Colgate shook herself out of her daze, and came back to the task at hand, carefully highlighting the problem areas of Lyra's mouth with her magic as her drill attacked them.
[hr}
Booker stared at the barracks-like building that Ditzy had described to him earlier, the very one that could jumpstart his career in Equina or whatever the hell it was called.
"Hello?" Booker called, pushing open the door to the building, the Vigors in the bag over his shoulder clinking together as he did so "Is anyone here?"
"Over here." a gray-coated stallion with a matching golden helmet and armor said, seated at a desk.
Booker assumed this must be one of the 'Royal Guard' that he'd heard about around town.
"Yes, I'd like to apply for a private contractor's license?" he asked.
"We don't accept mercenaries here, buzz off pal." the stallion stated gruffly, not looking up from the parchment he was scribbling on.
"I'm an officer of the law, not a damned mercenary," Booker spat, stepping closer to the desk "I'm a detective."
"Why the buck would you want to be a detective?" the stallion said, finally glancing up, now noticing Booker's full stature "Th-that's one of the lowest ranks the Royal Guard offers, just ahead of Corporal and Private."
"I'm a private investigator, I'd like to apply for a license." Booker repeated sternly, loosing his patience with the gray-coated stallion.
"Alright then," the stallion replied with a shrug, lifting a heavy packet of papers out of a drawer of his desk "here's the written test, we'll begin your physicals next week."
"Can't we do them sooner?" Booker inquired.
"No exceptions, come back next Wednesday." the stallion huffed bluntly, staring once more at his paperwork.
An hourglass raised itself onto the desk as Booker sat down, enveloped in an amber aura.
"You have two hours to finish the test, any more than that, and you automatically fail."
Booker nodded, and began the test, scratching on it with a short pencil he'd produced from his pocket.
"Are you sure this is a good idea, Miss Twilight?" Ditzy asked, two bottles sitting between herself and the purple unicorn "I mean, these belong to Mister DeWitt, I'd be breaking his trust if I just gave them to you!"
"I agree," Twilight nodded "which is why I couldn't possibly ask you to do such a thing, I just want to take samples of the liquids inside, for study."
"Oh...well...I suppose that would be alright...there wouldn't be any real damage, I guess..."
"I'll only take half a vial, how does that sound?" Twilight said, producing two vials out of her saddlebags.
"I...I guess so...I mean, you're not really stealing anything..."
"I promise that whatever's left over, I'll bring right back, Pinkie Promise."
"O...okay..."
Twilight sat on her haunches, tongue sticking out of her muzzle as as she stared at the liquids contained in the two vials. Her results so far weren't much, and she was beginning to feel a panic attack coming on. Where did the strength lie in the mysterious liquids? who made them? What purpose did they serve?
These questions, and many more, filtered through her mind as she took two eyedroppers and dunked them into each of the vials. Pulling a petri dish over the smooth surface of her worktable, she squeezed the bulbs of the droppers, forcing a droplet to fall out each dropper. Green and purple mixed together, fizzling and crackling as Twilight backed away from the bench, fully prepared to run up the steps if necessary.
The concoction in the dish hissed violently as electricity crackled and sparked around it. Violet streaks of lightning shot across the lab, dancing and arching as Twilight ducked, fearful of what the end result of the experiment might be.
The dish burst, emitting a loud, almost explosion-like noise. Twilights ears popped as she covered her head, her hooves protecting her face from the wrath of the out-of-control experiment.
"Wow, cool!" a small, childish voice stated.
Twilight uncovered her eyes, lifting her goggles so they rested above her horn. Her jaw dropped in disbelief when she spied a completely purple filly with green eyes, no taller than her stomach, standing on the bench, above the petri dish. Her mane was composed of jagged crystal formations, sparkling and crackling.
"Where's my daddy?" it asked in the same voice, though raising in volume "I know you're not my daddy! Where's my daddy?!"
"Twilight- is everything okay down-"
The filly suddenly disappeared in a flash of dark lightning, slithering through the air as it hissed, discharging itself into the air. Spike ducked in the open doorway as it passed over him, coming dangerously close to electrocuting him.
"Twilight..." Spike murmured, standing back up.
"I honestly have no idea, Spike..." Twilight said tiredly, then passed out right on the steps.
Booker sat, staring at the test, wondering just what the hell he was supposed to do in case of magical build-up caused by something called an 'inhibitor ring', when the front door to the office blew open, startling the stallion at the desk, forcing him to fall out of his chair as a whirlwind blew into the office. The blur popped, transforming into a small horse. The thing landed on the floor with a clunk, then bounded into his lap, surprising the ever-living-hell out of him.
"Found you, daddy!" it shrieked, the familiar sound of Shock Jockey arching back and forth between the crystals that made up its mane.
'Sonofabitch...' Booker thought to himself as the creature placed its forehooves on his chest.
"Now I get to hide, and you seek, right?" it asked, grinning curiously.
Booker couldn't think of a proper response to this...this...thing, filly...
"Isn't it...that how it works?" she said, her grin wavering.
"Eh...yeah, that's...that's it alright..." he said, wondering why the hell he was so calm around the thing that had just called him 'daddy'.
"Oh, good," the filly said, sighing in relief "I wouldn't have wanted to get it wrong."
Booker cocked an brow, glancing back and forth between the guardstallion and the Vigor-like pony.
"I've got a...uh...personal issue to deal with..." Booker began.
The guard rolled his eyes, and flipped the hourglass.
"Come back and take the exam after your physicals."
"Is that standard?" Booker asked.
"No, but I feel as if that's about as close as I'm going to get with you."
"I'll be back." Booker said, standing. The filly, incidentally, clung to his vest like a magnet, further confusing the man it was attached to.
"I'm sure you will." the guard responded bluntly.
"We're we going daddy?" it asked, still hanging onto the front of Booker's jacket.
Booker looked down, meeting the filly's green eyes.
"Well...uh..."
'What the hell should I do?' he wondered 'Should I try and take her to Ditzy's? Who the hell should I ask about this kind of thing?'
"Uh...why don't we go home? You must be tired." Booker suggested.
"Nope! I feel as energetic as a penny in a light socket!" she cheered, swinging from his vest as he walked, then her face quickly turned into one of confusion "What's a penny? What's a light socket?" |
Revelation | Alive and kickin' | "So...let me get this straight..." Booker muttered, rubbing tiredly at his face as "Shock-Jockey" and Anna slept peacefully beside him on Ditzy's sofa "you stole an unknown, highly powerful substance, which you knew nothing about...and mixed them..."
Twilight nodded sheepishly, blushing as she tried to keep eye contact with Booker.
"You're fuckin' insane..." Booker muttered to the princess.
"You...you're not mad?" Twilight asked.
"Oh no, I'm mad- really mad, you and I are going to have a talk about this in the morning..."
Twilight's ears splayed back as her head lowered, not able to look Booker in the eye.
"Which two did you use?" Booker asked, genuinely curious.
"I...I don't know..." Twilight replied, thinking back "I...one was green, and the other was purple..."
"So you mixed Shock Jockey, and...either Possession or Charge," Booker guessed "though given, I think it's safe to assume it was the former."
"Um...how did it happen?" Ditzy asked, mirroring what Booker was thinking.
"I'm not so sure..." Twilight admitted, then looking to Booker "...this 'Possession', what does it do?"
"Exactly what it is," Booker replied "somehow it tricks the target into fighting for you."
"What practical application would this have in real life?" Ditzy asked "And why would you need somepony to fight for you?"
"It's...just the way things were, back home." Booker half-lied.
Twilight adopted a curious expression, then shook her head, presumably to continue thinking.
"If that's the case...then that could very well be the answer!" Twilight answered excitedly.
"I'm afraid I don't follow." Booker stated.
"Me too." Ditzy agreed.
"Well, it's plausible that the power of the Possession was boosted by the natural thaumaturge channels flowing through the air, and when it was combined with the..."
"Shock-Jockey."
"Er, yes- when combined with the Shock-Jockey, it must've resulted in a magical collapse of the thaumati circulating in the air."
"What?" Booker asked.
"Or maybe a magnetic dissonance in the thermosphere, where the natural laws of magic didn't agree with the supernatural powers of the liquids." Ditzy suggested.
"That could very well be a-" Twilight stopped, then stared at Ditzy "how did you know about that?"
Ditzy shrugged modestly.
"Living with two unicorns gives you some motivation to do some light reading, in case of accidents..." Ditzy said, blushing.
"Just what the hell are you two talking about?" Booker asked, his head starting to ache.
"Just some theories, Mr. DeWitt," Twilight replied, then grew concerned "...did you not understand any of that?"
"Not a word." Booker replied.
Twilight went slack-jawed.
"Bu-But- surely your kind must have an advanced knowledge of magic in order to create such powerful potions!"
"Potion, Vigor- hell, they could be both, but it sure as hell doesn't seem like magic to me..."
"I...I...how? Tell me how a your kind, a race with no knowledge of advanced spellbinding or potion-making, could make the liquids!"
"I've got no idea, Sparkle," Booker said, then cringed "I know it's at least one-part science, the rest? You got me."
"I...I need to think on this..." Twilight said, staring at the floor as she rubbed her head "thank you for having me, Ditzy."
"No problem, the three of us hardly have visitors!" Ditzy replied cheerfully.
Twilight walked to the door, then gave a backward glance as she left, slowly closing the door.
Booker rubbed his eyes and stood, mindful of the ceiling this time. Taking both Anna and the purple-maned foal into his arms, he followed Ditzy, whom had slid a wing under Dinky, and carried her on her back.
Booker traversed the hall, and entered a small room. Carefully setting them both on the bed, he allowed Ditzy to do the same.
"Mister DeWitt?" Ditzy asked.
"Yeah?" the tired man answered.
"Are you alright?"
"No...I don't think so."
Booker jumped as a feathery wing eased around his stomach.
Using his foot, Booker slowly pushed Ditzy away from him, and walked to his room. He then eased the door closed, leaving Ditzy in the hall.
"Oh...um...okay-" |
Revelation | Mean, green, fixing machine | "Rarity- Spike..." Booker heaved, going weak in the knees "...don't...do that...again..."
The unicorn and baby dragon nodded tiredly, just as tired as Booker was.
"Spike...you owe me..." he added, collapsing onto the grass.
Spike had somehow managed to cast some sort of manipulation spell on Rarity, next thing he knew- Rarity was re-decorating, re-furbishing, and re-upholstering everything in sight. Spike, probably thinking he was up to his ear fins in trouble, and came to him to help solve the problem. Holding down a marshmallow white pony was a lot more difficult than it sounded- especially when said marshmallow white pony was a unicorn. It took both the combined efforts of both Spike and himself to just catch her.
The baby dragon nodded in resignation, closing his eyes as his tiny chest puffed in and out.
A gentle breeze blew by, brushing his face and body as he stared at the stationary clouds hanging against the pure blue backdrop of sky.
Pain twinged in his gut as the soft grass tickled the back of his neck.
'Must be low on salts...' he thought to himself, removing a small, hardened lump from his vest pocket. Taking a very hesitant bite, he slugged the small lump of salt, and the burning in his muscles ceased, at least temporarily.
'Must be the magic in the air.' Booker thought, glancing at the tired unicorn and baby dragon.
He could only assume that the magic was speeding up his recovery, or at least that's what he assumed, based on Twilight's lecture earlier in the week.
"So...what's the plan now?" Spike asked, apparently looking to Booker for help.
"Beats the hell out of me." he shrugged, glancing around the empty field.
"Well..." Rarity began, popping her spine as she rose "the first thing you're going to do, is confess to Twilight about this little escapade."
"Not to mention, destroy that book..." Booker muttered under his breath.
"What was that?!" Rarity snapped, her mane frazzled.
"I think we've all had a rough day," Booker sighed, really not wanting to pick a fight with an angry and stressed unicorn "why don't we all head back home and talk about this tomorrow? No one has to find out until then."
Rarity looked as if she were about to argue, while Spike glanced between the two of them, an expectant look on his face.
"Fine...I suppose we've had enough excitement for one day." Rarity replied tersely.
Spike and himself sighed in relief simultaneously. Rarity began at a moderate trot, then progressively came to a limp, one of her hind legs acting up.
He briefly thought about making a joke, given the situation, but the three of them had had a long day, and now wasn't the particular time to agitate either Rarity or Spike.
Booker approached Rarity, and plucked her off the ground, with no small amount of effort. Carrying a colt or filly back in the cavalry? That was easy. A full-grown-pony, about the size of a German Shepherd? Not so much.
"Mister DeWitt! I'll have you know-"
"I don't care what you 'know'." Booker grumbled, walking back into town.
"I beg your pardon?"
"Look..." Booker sighed "...we're all tired...let me just do this...and...you can give it to me tomorrow, okay? You're limping."
Spike muttered something incoherent as Rarity blushed hotly. Booker simply rolled his eyes and the trio continued their journey towards the Boutique.
"Mister DeWitt?" Spike asked.
"Yeah?" Booker grunted in response.
"...have you ever killed anyone?"
"...yeah..." Booker responded, unsure where the conversation was heading.
"Did...d-did you enjoy it?"
Booker turned and stared at the young drake questioningly.
"I-I mean...was it easy? To look at someone that you've....?"
"Some of my buddies back on in the cavalry would say it gets easier with time..."
"And you?" Rarity asked, interested.
"...no..." he answered "...it's never easy..."
The three finished the walk back in silence.
Booker entered his new place of residence, he took notice of Anna napping on the couch, and made a beeline for his room. Once inside, he loosened his tie and dove onto the bed, closing his eyes and adjusting himself.
The sound of little hooves on the carpet gave way to confusion. It was only after 1 o'clock, Dinky was still in school- Sparkler and Ditzy were out...
His question was soon answered as four small hooves landed on his back. He shouted in pain, and glared at the newest addition to the household. The purple filly was now looking at him in concern, her features turning into a frown as her ears flipped downward. Booker rolled his eyes, not finding the energy to scold her at the moment. Begrudgingly, he opened his arms and the filly leapt forward, curling into his arms.
Booker sighed, and rolled over, so the filly was now laying atop his chest.
'God...' he thought, starting to drift off 'why the hell am I always the one in these situations?' |
Twilight's Blog | pre | Time to trot! It's all cooked and packed and we're heading out the door. Potluck suppers are fun!
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Buckwheat and Alfalfa Sprout Pancake Rolls With Hot and Sour Orange Sauce (serves seven to ten):
Prepare Alfalfa Sprout Pancake Rolls.
Prepare Hot and Sour Orange Sauce.
Serve cool.
Served cool on a plate with a splash or artful dribble of spicy orange sauce, these delightful soft aromatic rolls with their watery, delicately crisp interiors are sure to please your dinner guests.
Buckwheat Pancakes (makes eight to ten pancakes):
Ingredients.
3 tea cups of wheat flour, finely milled.
3 tea cups of buckwheat flour.
2 heaping tea spoons of baking powder
3 soup spoons of sugar
1 tea spoon of salt
1 egg
3 soup spoons of melted butter
7 tea cups of milk
Put the butter into a frying pan and start heating it. This will melt the butter and also coat the frying pan and prepare it for cooking the pancakes.
Sift all the dry ingredients (flours, baking powder, sugar and salt) into a large bowl and stir.
In another bowl, beat the egg lightly, throw away the egg shell (or feed it to Spike!), then stir in the melted butter. Next, stir in the milk.
Pour the liquid mixture into dry mixture and stir. Stop when the mix is runny and lumpy throughout. Have more milk on the ready if this batter is not runny enough.
When the pan is just sizzling hot, pour in one ladle of pancake batter and wait for bubbles to appear and start to burst. Use a spatula to flip the pancakes, even if you are an ace chef (that one on the ceiling is yours, Spike).
When done, the pancake should be a mottled golden brown on both sides. Adjust the temperature of the frying pan to cook fast without burning the pancakes.
For pancake rolls, you can get a thinner pancake by adding more milk to the batter. This also makes two to three more pancakes.
Alfalfa Sprout Pancake Rolls
Ingredients.
10 hoof and a half sized warm thin pancakes
5 tea cups of fresh washed alfalfa sprouts
10 toothpicks
Prepare: Pancakes. (May be substituted: other pancakes, such as Buckwheat, Jennycakes and Oatmeal.)
While the pancakes are warm and flexible, on each pancake add a half tea cup of alfalfa sprouts, roll the pancake into a tight cylinder with the alfalfa on the inside, and secure the roll by piercing it through and through with a toothpick.
Serve with: Hot and Sour Orange sauce, Peanut sauce, Peppermint sauce or Flambe.
Hot and Sour Orange Sauce
Ingredients.
1 tea cup water
1 tea spoon sugar
2 soup spoons fine ground orange peel
1 half tea spoon salt
1 half tea cup lemon juice
1 tea spoon hot sauce
1 soup spoon cilantro
1 tea spoon arrowroot powder
In a small pot, combine the water with the sugar, stirring to dissolve the sugar. Heat to a low simmer, then add the orange peel and salt, stirring to dissolve the salt.
Simmer and stir 5 minutes.
Remove from heat, add lemon juice, hot sauce and stir while cooling until warm to the touch.
Stir in the cilantro and arrowroot while warm and serve at room temperature.
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Just Desserts
March 9: There's always too much to eat at a pot luck supper. Last night, I was afraid that my ten small alfalfa sprout buckwheat pancake rolls wouldn't be enough, but of course when you add five more small courses to the meal, everypony ends up fit to burst.
Pinkie had us fooled. She did bring the dessert, but it looked like beet sticks and hay burgers! Rainbow Dash nearly choked laughing. They were small cakes and cherry ice cream. The winter weather kept it from melting on the way to Applejack's place. It was delicious.
Over dinner we got to speaking about restaurants and dessert. Pinkie told us that everypony likes dessert but it doesn't help the restaurant, especially not busy restaurants. Desserts often require a specialty pastry chef, thus more cooks to pay and less kitchen space for preparing the mane meals. That increases the cost overhead for a restaurant.
There is only so much a pony is willing to pay for dessert, so a plate of cake is never going to be priced as much as a plate of greens and hay. That means less profit for the restaurant. Dessert keeps ponies at a table longer, increasing time spent by customer at a table by 50% or more. That slows down turnover which cuts into the profits of busy restaurants.
The problem is that everypony likes dessert and if a restaurant doesn't serve dessert, they'll go eat somewhere else. So restaurants have to have desserts on the menu to keep ponies happy, even though they'd wish you'd skip dessert and didn't linger.
Now drinks, that's where the money is. Fancy teas, cider, fruit juices, these go with the mane course, increasing how much a pony spends without increasing how long they occupy a table.
And Sugarcube corner? It only serves dessert and tea. It makes money because most of the customers don't eat their cakes at Sugarcube, they take them home. So the Cakes have more customers and fewer tables to serve.
As for catering, that's a whole different horse race.
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Tea With Rarity
March 10: After meeting up with Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie at the spa, Rarity invited us over for tea. Fluttershy had a pet-grooming appointment and Pinkie had Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake to go sit, so it was just me and Rarity in her Boutique.
Rarity prepared a pot of jasmine tea, put on Beethooven's Pasture Symphony and we chatted about the tapestries and library in the Carerfilly Castle ruins. We really should fix the damage. The rift between the royal sisters is no more and the gaping wounds in that old structure should be repaired as well.
I couldn't stay long and I left Rarity's boutique shortly after drinking my tea. Tomorrow I have to go on royal business to Canterlot and I will be gone all day. I'm all freshly groomed thanks to the spa ponies, but I have some chapters I need to read and a checklist to make before bed. A chariot will arrive to pick me up right at dawn.
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March 11: (Busy all day in Canterlot.)
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Royal Duty
March 12: With the crown comes the duty. I got up early yesterday morning, did everything on my checklist (it's so satisfying to tick off those little boxes) and stepped out my door just as the twilight met the dawn. The chariot that Princess Celestia had sent to collect me was ready and waiting. I got in and gave the two white royal guard pegasi the go ahead. As the sun climbed, pink, orange and yellow into the sky, so did we, flying fast and true to the mountain city of Canterlot.
It was a cold trip through the crisp winter air and hunkered down in the chariot, I was glad for my scarf and my red cowled horse blanket. We set down at the entrance of the castle where a livery pony took my garments and led me to the hall where I had breakfast with Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. They filled me in on protocol and what to expect. Breakfast over, we went to the Grand Hall where the mayors and officials from across Equestria were assembled.
This was the Annual Assembly of Equestrian Municipal Affairs where a representative of each municipality reported on their affairs and economic contribution Equestrian society. They all addressed us, but apart from Princess Luna's speech from the throne, we did not speak. Chairpony Flax Bit and the Royal Committee on Equestrian Finance and Civic Affairs received the speakers one by one, asked all the questions and noted all the grievances. We just made the whole proceedings official. It was a long day.
I could have kicked for a book to read. Trying hard not to fidget. Some of those ponies just seemed to drone on and on. Princess Celestia must have been meditating, I don't know how she managed to look so serene through the whole proceedings. Lunch break was a relief, and then it was back to the thrones on the high platform and trying to look regal. I bet Princess Cadence was happy for me to be sitting in for her.
Mid afternoon Mayor Mare gave her report, projecting an increase in crop production to make up for last year's shortfall. Each municipality also submitted a written report. I could have just read those in half the time.
Early supper break, and back to the assembly. Only a few more towns to go.
The last municipality gave their report and we retired while the committee deliberated and the princesses set the sun and raised the moon. Then we sat down one last time for the committee's closing remarks and to sign and seal the register.
Luna's personal guard and chariot were waiting for me in the castle courtyard. Luna's moon was rising large and luminous among the dazzling stars. I could hear the chatter of ponies and the sound of a string quartet in the garden. I drew my cloak about me, straightened my crown and stepped into the chariot. The two black pegasi spread their wings and whisked me off through the brisk night air. Home, to the quiet and comfort, to my books. Away from the turbulent crowds.
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Pony Spatial Cognition in Relation to Displacement of Objects in the Equestrian Environment
March 13: Ponies choose appropriate routes in the Equestrian environments to optimize their own displacements, but they also use this predictive ability to move objects, from thrown apples to rain showers.
Ponies have a feel for taking a route that gets them to their destination despite living in a landscape where the shortest distance between two points is rarely a straight line. As I explained before, the slightest shake changes how long a train trip lasts and just hoofing it can get you there faster.
Ponies start to develop these skills from the day that they're born, developing a cognitive map of their immediate surroundings and recognizing landmarks. They inventory objects, remember outcomes and sense the passage of time. The critical part of the brain responsible for navigation is the hippocampus, a pair of 'c' shaped structures in the temporal lobes. As young ponies grow, they choose preferred paths to navigate a wiggly environment where distance is a function of approach. Of course, each pony makes slightly different choices when building a cognitive map of their Equestria, but the outcome is generally the same.
The hippocampus is where memory, time sense and the cognitive map of a pony's private Equestria resides, but it's in the prefrontal cortex part of the brain where a pony makes sense of it all and acts accordingly. The prefrontal cortex also connects to a unicorn's horn. By capitalizing on the wiggle of Equestrian topography and the fact that nothing is ever perfectly still, a unicorn moves objects. What moves and how subtly is a function of the mental origami performed in the unicorn mind. Timing, movement and form. Grab, throw, grab, throw, pull through and there you go, tying that winter scarf, just like your mother taught you. That's magic.
A unicorn may be adept at guiding an object through space, but all ponies get a sense of where objects that they've let go will land. Earth ponies and pegasi use position and timing to ensure objects to which they've imparted kinetic energy and momentum land where they want them to. Rain clouds generally stay where weather ponies put them, but it takes extra skill to get the rain to fall where you want it to. Just like it takes skill to get apples to fall from the trees and into your baskets, and not land three fields over.
Pinkie takes navigation in a non-Euclydean landscape to the next level. She not only predicts the best path for her movements and for things she's moved, she feels out the possible paths of objects around her that could intersect with her projected positions.
Like traveling from point A to B, it's largely subconscious. Pinkie has connected her enhanced map to her motor cortex and translated her feelings of dread into coded body spasms to better know what it is she's expecting and act accordingly. She calls this her Pinkie Sense.
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All Team Organizer Coat
March 14: Only five more days until Winter Wrap Up! I went with Spike to drop off my all-team-organizer coat at Rarity's place so she could adjust it for my wings and my bigger body1. There were a few other ponies already there with their Winter Wrap Up jackets and about a dozen in a pile by Rarity's sewing machine. Oops. I could have not waited to the last moment, but what if I grew some more and had to get my coat adjusted twice?
I got my turn with Rarity and she'll be letting a bit out at the seams. She's not worried about getting all the jackets repaired and altered in time, as long as not too many more ponies show up at the last minute. Maybe I should include that in my Winter Wrap Up itinerary next year. A pre-Winter Wrap Up check list of supplies and a jacket maintenance schedule, alphabetically by name.
I'd better get Spike and go talk to the team leaders about supplies now, and start that check list. Or rather, tomorrow, when the sun's up.
1 My growth has not been smooth but has followed the growth in power and connection between my friends and to our identities. Magical power is something a pony grows into as they tame it and make it theirs. As I tame alicorn magic, build the connections, the neural pathways that make that power mine, I grow larger and stronger. There is much to learn.
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Winter Pet Date
March 15: Winter Wrap Up is only four days away now. The weather ponies must be scraping out the bottom of their snow flake bins. There's fresh snow on the ground today, but it's all bits and pieces. I guess I won't see the sparkle of fresh snowflakes until next year.
I dropped in on Amethyst Star, Team Leader for the Animal Team. Her supplies are gathered and ready to go. She knows who to assign to what and where, we just have to plan out the timing a bit and it will be perfect.
Next I took Owlowiscious to our pet date, and Spike and my checklist too. While Winona chased snowballs and Angel dug tunnels in the snowbanks, I consulted Rainbow Dash and Applejack, the Team Leaders for the Weather and Plant Teams.
The carts, shovels, plows and bells are dusted, tuned, repaired and ready (check!). Seeds are properly identified and ready to plant, sticks, ribbons and straw all set to go (check check!). Ponyville ponies are old pros at WWU.
The plows, nest making and planting material and half the carts are to be stored at Applejack's, the rest of the material at the morning rendezvous location, Town Hall. Sounds good to me. I'll double check the inventory1 with the team leaders on site the day before Winter Wrap Up, to be sure. Maybe we should number the shovels. And put the seeds in alphabetical order; and sort the straw and sticks by size!
Annnd, maybe not. A good friend knows when not to go overboard. I rolled up the checklist and Spike took a nap.
Owlowiscious had a great time hooting directions to Winona who was trying to find the snowballs she hadn't caught. Most of the time, all I could see of Angel was his ears poking out of a burrow. Opal watched from her pet carrier. She had declined to step out into the cold, wet snow. Tank and Gummy were absent. Tank was hibernating and Gummy was feeling sluggish, basking by the oven at Sugarcube Corner. Snow's not his thing either.
It was a grey day and we didn't stay long. I woke Spike, called Owlowiscious and we all went home.
1 With some things, like ice skates, ponies provide their own. But it's risky to wait until Winter Wrap Up Day to find out if all the kinds of seeds we need are where we thought they had been stored.
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Game Night
March 16: We got together for an impromptu supper and game night in our Friendship Treecastle. Spike and I threw together a big mixed hay salad and some hot sugar beet pulp soup, a big bowl of alfalfa cubes, a smaller bowl of peppermint sticks and sugar cubes, and a whole lot of mint tea, just in time for our friends to arrive.
I had the food and dishes displayed on one table and the games on another. We were going to have fun, fun, fun! By the book! I had Bookchase, Ring Fling, Bundle of Sticks, Tangle, Piaffle, Rope Rings and lots of quills, ink and scrolls for score keeping and for more games like Tic Tac Toe and Bulls and Cows.
The long smooth surface of the mane hallway is perfect for Ring Fling, and after wiping the tracked snow off the hard rock floor, Applejack and Rainbow Dash were already at it, with Spike waiting to challenge the winner. In Ring Fling, the object is to make flat wooden rings slide and stop as close as possible to a target 10 pony lengths away. Applejack had suggested horseshoes, but sand and dings from flying shoes in the hall, not a good idea. The wooden rings are propelled with a hoof-tip in the ring and a swing of the leg. A felt cushion makes them slide easily and they give a satisfying tok! sound when they knock other rings off the target. Rarity bought this set last time we were in Canterlot with just this in mind.
Everypony helped themselves to the food and we got down to gaming. Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and I settled on the Bundle of Sticks1 game which we set up on a low table to one side. I'm useless at these skill games but Rarity and Fluttershy were really good at pulling out the colored sticks without letting the structure collapse. Mouths only, no wings or horns allowed! It was tough holding my head sideways to try and reach the white sticks without brushing against them with my mane.
Later Rarity and Spike were battling it out at the Ring Fling, I was dueling with Applejack over Bulls and Cows and the others had started a game of Rope Rings, with a bird bath as the target.
Everypony has gone home now but we had lots of fun. Game night was a success!
1 Bundle of Sticks -- shake 100 (elbow) length sticks into one ring of yarn and get the structure to stand on the table, carefully remove the sticks one by one so the sticks remain standing, each pony removes a stick until it collapses, ending the game. (or for points: yellow / gold-1, blue / sapphire-2, green / emerald-3, red / ruby-4, white / diamond-5 points)
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The Wild Woods
March 17: Warmer air from longer days is making fog rise off the snow in and around Ponyville. It's very pretty, but ponies do like to see into the distance, just in case something nasty might be creeping up on them. So the streets of Ponyville were mostly empty. Rainbow Dash will be out clearing the fog soon.
The Everfree Forest has a mind of its own and was mostly fog-free. Sure, there are many dangerous creatures there and the gloom and untamed plant growth makes me feel trapped, but I wanted to visit Zecora, and between the fog and the Everfree, the Everfree Forest was almost more inviting.
Spring isn't for another three days in snowbound Ponyville, but in the Everfree, a lot of the snow is gone and there are spring flowers! I saw snowdrops, coltsfoot, skunk cabbage and crocuses pushing up from the ground, the skunk cabbage was even melting the snow! Weird, wonderful, worrying... I hurried on.
Zecora welcomed me inside and over tea we chatted about spring, the Equestrian Municipal Affairs reports, magic and the magical resonance that occurred last "Twilight Time". Zecora thinks I should see if the foals can repeat the tree canister feat. A hollow tree can make a nice house, fit for a pony if coaxed to grow larger than that for a mouse.
If we try that, we'll do it outside in the spring. I don't need a full sized tree in my hall. Especially not if it catches fire or explodes.
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All Set For Winter Wrap Up
March 18: Today I went with the three Team Leaders to double check the inventory for tomorrow's Winter Wrap Up. Everything is present and accounted for at Sweet Apple Acres and at Town Hall. I got my All-Team-Organizer vest back from Rarity, all nicely adjusted again. Quills, ink, checklists! And Spike, of course. Ready to give 110%, which doesn't make sense, unless he's counting assistance from Owlowiscious.
Time for one last evening stroll in the snow.
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Winter Wrap Up: Up Before the Dawn
March 19: Winter Wrap Up starts at first light! It's still dark out. I can't wait! Got my All-Team-Organizer vest on and a projected optimal work flow that should respect the deadlines of all three teams. Should I go wake Spike already? We could get a front row view of Mayor Mare's speech!
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Winter All Wrapped Up
March 20: Spike dragged his feet a bit yesterday morning so we weren't in the front row for Mayor Mare's speech, but close enough. She got us all raring to go, then the Team Leaders got to work splitting up their crews according the Winter Wrap Up itinerary that I'd made.
The first priority is clearing the snow off houses, trees and the higher elevations to avoid flooding the animal burrows. That required all of the weather crew, except for two flight crews who were pointed south to fetch the birds, and half the Animal Team.
The other half of the Animal Team got to the task of with stringing up the bells while Rarity started building nests.
The plant crew delivered Rarity's supplies and got down to clearing, plowing and planting the fields in a regimented formation. Snow plows are not as bereft of magic as they may first appear. The motor pushing a snow plow is an earth pony, and earth pony power and skill is magic. That's how they clear the snow so well. Yoke a manticore to the driver's bar and the best it would be able to do is push the snow. A manticore-powered winter wrap up would take weeks.
Once the higher snow had been cleared, the Animal Team reformed, picked up their animal care material and went to wake up the sleeping critters and help Rarity make and install nests. As the critters awoke to baskets of food, the weather team donned skates and went to score the ice by crisscrossing the lakes and ponds.
Fluttershy and her animal waking crew reported success. All the critters were awake, fed and their homes dusted clean. I tried to break up some clouds. It's harder than it looks.
Finally Rainbow Dash's Weather Team formed a controlled tornado and swept the skies clear, and what was left of the snow with it. The afternoon sun beamed down, breaking the ice and the free members of the Weather and Animal Teams joined the Plant Team in finishing up the planting and watering of the fields. The southern flocks arrived this morning to green fields and open water.
Applejack's Plant Team ponies are looking a lot perkier now that they have fresh dirt clinging to their hooves. I feel more awake now than I have in the past month. There must be something in the soil.
The sky is clear, the birds are singing and the air smells like spring. Winter wrapped up on time in Ponyville, check!
Spring is here.
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Pinkie's Spring has Sprung Party
March 21: It's the first full day of spring, so naturally, Pinkie, Ponyville's permanent party pony, threw a party for the whole town.
There were banners, balloons and streamers and cake, pinatas and games like kick the can and pin the tail on the pony, and Pinkie's special punch. Which hopefully was not Gummy's favorite.
The Ponytones sang, the foals ran a six-legged race, many mares were sporting lovely spring hats and everypony had confetti and streamers on their coats and in their manes.
Spring flowers are coming up everywhere and the southern birds were singing their hearts out. The smell of warm earth and fresh growth was in the air. The spring sun in the blue sky felt wonderful on my face and I spread my wings to cradle that warmth.
Evening came and as night fell my friends and I gathered close to watch Pinkie's fireworks burst like giant flowers in the sky. It was magical.
And as another sure sign of spring, I've also started to shed.
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Ocean of Storms, Sea of Serenity
March 22: As much as we ponies put on airs and congratulate ourselves for keeping Equestria habitable and pleasant, we are animals and living things, just as much as any other animal or living thing in Equestria. As such, we make mistakes based on looking out for ourselves first and foremost. We plant our crops to suit us. We coddle the animals that appeal to us. We claim land and resources for ourselves. Like every other plant and animal, we push all obstacles out of our way to claim what we want. We are just better at that than just about any other species in Equestria.
I am not perfect. Sometimes I crave attention. Sometimes I want to run and hide. Am I worthy? Did I brag too much? Why does this bother me? I have books, shelter and food, I should be content. What is this urge to go out and talk to ponies? I am a pony, ponies are herd animals. I am an animal and my nature betrays me. My herd, my nature, my books.
We have made Equestria our pasture and we have to tend it carefully. If we fail, there will be no more ponies. This realm will go on without us, something may even survive and flourish. It would be sad for ponies, but indifferent for what was once Equestria. The rocks bear the scars of all that passes but the rocks know not what they remember. Time moves on.
I must live in the moment. I must not overreach. My closest friends are my herd. My creature comforts are the silences that bookend the turning of a page.
My thoughts are my own.
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Spring Molt
March 23: Spring molt is definitely underway. I dropped a few primaries this morning, a secondary is loose and my wings are looking ratty. Every time I get up, my reading cushion has a lilac coating of hair.
Spike is grumbling about hair clogging the drains. On the bright side, I now have new quills that match my coat!
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Whicker Quasiprobable Topography
March 24: On further thought, for non-natives, moving about in Equestria wouldn't be quite as wobbly as I'd first imagined it. I had thought that should a human appear in Equestria, they would find that moving would be like walking on violently shaking jelly. The thing is, most of the paths between points in Equestria are roughly the same distance, so it wouldn't be quite that bad.
The overall effect of the non-Euclydean geometry is to give objects a quasiprobable location and thus a fuzzy appearance to unadjusted eyes. The outlier paths between points are what you could consider the equivalent of quantum tunneling and they're easy enough to find and exploit.
So sure, careless walking will cause you to suddenly bang into objects that had appeared to be far away, but if you keep perfectly still, your surroundings will look a lot sharper! Maybe your best bet would be to sit in a cart and let a pony do the walking. Of course, there's the risk that every jostle of the moving cart could cause you to accidentally drag it every which way, and the hapless pony pulling you, along with it. Well, how about a full-body cast hooked to balloons? That might work!
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I Shed She Shed
March 25: I dropped four more secondary feathers and two new primaries are growing in. The blood feathers are very sensitive and distracting.
We got together for brunch in the 'throne room' and we're all molting like crazy. There was hair in the tea, hair in the salad (fresh dandelion greens!), hair on the frosting on the cupcakes... White hair, yellow hair, lilac hair, blue hair, orange hair, pink hair... Hair everywhere. I heard Spike mutter something about stuffing a mattress with it.
Rarity says that March is the cruelest month. She's threatening to "give this whole ghastly affair the heave-ho" and have the spa ponies shave and wax her entire body! Pinkie was laughing so hard she turned blue. While leaving a fuzzy pink halo on the floor.
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Focus
March 26: I counted two more primaries dropped and I have two secondaries growing in fast. It's not just my flight feathers, some of my contour feathers are dropping too.
When will this end? I feel disorganized and distracted. I need blinkers so I can focus. My winter coat slowly drifts to the floor.
I can feel little lilac hair-bunny eyes watching me from crawl spaces under the furniture. Every passing breeze sends them scurrying about. They grow larger.
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Out For a Brush of Fresh Hair
March 27: I had to get out into the fresh spring air and find a sunny spot to read, away from the musty smell of dust bunnies grown fat on my shed coat.
Many ponies were out too, and it lifted my spirits to note that everypony's coats were just as ratty as mine.
Quills and Sofas in town is having an inventory clearance sale on quills. With feathers raining down from the sky, I can see why. I circled back and headed to the eastern meadow.
I had brought a couple of brushes with me. I chose a dry, sandy bit of ground and before settling down to read, I brushed out all the loose hair I could and set it free.
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Heart Felt Figures
March 28: I had tea with Rarity and Fluttershy this afternoon in the Carousel Boutique's sitting room.
With the worst of the spring molt in full swing, Rarity has taken to wearing a shawl, hat and sunglasses, even indoors, to keep the molt from getting everywhere.
On a little end table by our cushions was Rarity's latest triumph. Ever inventive, she has been making little dolls out of her shed hair, the fine insulating hair lends itself well to needle felting. They have bead and sequin eyes and she's even tied mane strands together and sewn them in to give her pony dolls proper tails and coiffures.
They were so adorable that we got out the brushes and harvested fresh yellow and lilac hair to provide Rarity with more raw material. We went outside to do that, to avoid coating everything in the Carousel Boutique with hair. We also shook out a bunch of contour feathers and once back inside with our spoils, snipped a few judicious clips from our manes as well.
Of the finished dolls, I brought home one that I thought looked the most like Rarity to give to Spike. He found a place for it on a shelf with his comic book collection. I think I'll ask Rarity if she could make a Spike-shaped felt "figure" to go with it.
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Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
March 29: Half my feathers have been replaced now. I gave myself another good brushing and my coat is starting to look a lot less ratty. Another week of this and I'll look spring fresh. Ha!
Meanwhile Rarity has been busy. She's brushed and trimmed Applejack and Pinkie Pie and made a few dolls that look just like them. She has them posed in a cabinet in her room. Rainbow Dash was a bit trickier and Rarity had to let her brush herself and snip her own hair. Rarity can be persistent and she usually gets what she sets out to get.
I asked Rarity if she could make a felted doll that looks like Spike. Rarity looked appraisingly at my fur for a moment, and got to harvesting more lilac colored shed off me as it about matches Spike's lilac scales. My molt is winding down so it took a while, but eventually she gathered enough fine hair with which she could needle felt a small figure. As for the green scales, she will probably dye some white felt green and work it in. Spike is going to be pleased.
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Green Felt and Long Black Beads
March 30: Rarity came over and gave Spike the felt doll she'd made to look like him. She had dyed some white felt made from her own fine winter fur to make the green scales and crest, and she used long black beads for the pupils in the doll's green sequin eyes. Spike held it preciously then rushed off to place it on his shelf, right next to his Rarity figure. I find it funny that with all his grumbling about hair all over everything, he's over the moon with this gift made from hair. What's worse, made for the most part with my hair.
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Spring Fresh
March 31st: The Spa ponies have had the worst of the spring molt. They've had a surge of customers come in, ponies looking to at least look and feel fresh for a short while, even if their coats aren't quite there yet. For Aloe and Lotus, getting the hair out of the mud bath is a lost cause, and keeping up with the filter in the hot tub is a constant struggle. Each customer is subject to a full brush down on admission, before they get even close to benefiting from any of the spa's other services. Everypony still sheds anyway.
We are no exceptions. We succeeded in reserving six places at the Spa this morning for an hour for the six of us. Rainbow Dash skipped the seaweed wrap and the hooficure but joined us in the sauna and the hot tub. They are still using Zecora's herbs and salts in the water. I feel so sleek! My coat is starting to get a summer shine and my new flight feathers look pretty good too.
As we left, Aloe tucked a red trillium into our manes and we stepped out into the bright sunshine, in high spirits and feeling as good as we smelled. We descended on a cafe, pulled two tables together and chatted about this that and the other thing over lunch and several pots of tea.
I finally feel as fresh as the spring.
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Twilight's Blog | IV April | But Then I was Part of His Dream Too
April 1: It was another glorious spring day today. I went back to my sandy knoll, stretched out and reread much of Harness in Wanderland by Levade Corral.
It got me thinking about the strange mirror-verse that Sunset Shimmer is exploring, and how she might be affecting it. And the possibilities! Why are the Sirens still young?
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Frozen in Time
April 2: I've been trying to puzzle out the nature of the Canterlot High world where Sunset Shimmer is staying. With the emergence of the Sirens there, I'm thinking that this Canterlot High universe was created by Star Swirl the Bearded.
Instead of building a bridge to an existing Alt-universe, I think he accidentally created a new, flawed Alt-Equestria. It is populated by beings that mirror the hearts and minds of existing Equestria residents, but they manifest as totally alien, flat-faced, bi-pedal and multiple-fingered furless beings.
Since there is no magic there, he used it to gently dispose of problem creatures, namely, a trio of Sirens bent on enslaving all of Equestria. Thing is, this Alt-Equestria is sustained by the Equestria it mirrors. At a certain age, the hearts and minds of new residents of Equestria in close proximity of Star Swirl's mirror is detected by Star Swirl's spell, which then causes a Canterlot High version of them to pop into existence.
I suspect that they spend their lives as teenagers enrolled in endless classes from which they never graduate. Really old ponies switch to a profession. And, as their Equestria counterparts die, they vanish.
The three Sirens are probably the only three that got dumped into Star Swirl's oubliette. Since they had no magical bridge of their own back to Equestria, they were caught in the static time loop of Star Swirl's closed universe.
In a closed universe, time does not just move forward, it moves in reverse as well. The context and ponies reflected from Equestria would change but no one notices, not even the three sirens. In this world all is illusion and memory is a flash in the pan that keeps getting rewritten1. It is so like the passage in Alice in Wanderland, where she meets the Red Queen, variable time running but remaining in a static frame.
The Sirens were imported by Star Swirl the Bearded and their magic was imported along with them via the gemstone each wears as a choker. This is quite similar to Sunset Shimmer importing magic via the Element of Magic crown. It still looks like magic is alien to the Canterlot High world but that magical artifacts remain magical when imported and that they leave a magical impression on Canterlot High beings they have affected. The Sirens may still be dangerous.
So, how does this mirrorverse work? Why haven't the Sirens experienced over a thousand years of exile there? Since this universe was created by Star Swirl, it isn't expanding and driving time forward via increasing entropy. Time there usually swings back and forth. But then came Sunset Shimmer and her book2. By keeping an open link to Equestria, it is causing the passage of time in the mirrorverse to match that of Equestria and thereby driving it out of its static frame. The question is, did Star Swirl set a time limit, say six years to match the high school model? Will this Alt-Equestria and all the entities living there implode into nothing? I think it may be time to try and convince Sunset Shimmer to come home.
It's the ultimate oubliette. It may well be a nearly inescapable oubliette. Without a tether like Sunset Shimmer's book-link to Princess Celestia, not much time passes before time reverses. The gateway opens every thirty moons in Equestria. At the Canterlot High end, prior to Sunset Shimmer, time may well have been restricted to less than 30 moons. The gate would open, but the pattern would depend on how time passes in Canterlot High.
If time lasted only a day, then it would seem that the gateway was open every day... or never. A pony trapped at Canterlot High wouldn't remember the days the gateway was closed. A short passage of time also reduces the amount of time a trapped pony can search for the gateway, assuming they didn't note where they came in. Or that the gateway at the Canterlot High end doesn't move!
Worse yet, if a pony came through the gateway with the plan to stay longer than the time span of the Canterlot High Universe, they might never leave because they'd never reach that goal! But now, thanks to Sunset Shimmer's tether to Equestria, time is moving as it would in an open universe (or a very big closed one).
I wonder, are there now trapped ponies rapping on the gateway back to Equestria every once in a while? I half expect Star Swirl the Bearded to walk out of that mirror one of these days.
1 As time swings back, all the memories, growth and connections that were formed during the forward swing are undone. It is a perfect amnesia. It is also, in a sense, a suspended animation that lasts until the pony or Siren returns to Equestria, or until this Canterlot High world collapses into nothing.
2 Sunset Shimmer's book is the one allows her to instantly send written notes to another book with which it is linked, without the benefit of dragonfire. I received the linked book along with a pile of other books given to me to furnish my castle library.
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Hidden in Plain Sight
April 3: I am still pondering the dynamics of the Canterlot High world.
With time swinging back and forth, a pony without a tether would not know that they are reliving the same situation over and over again, the only changes being the changes mirrored from Equestria.
But unless that short swing in time is just a short while in the night, it still doesn't explain how there haven't been visitors from Canterlot High. The gateway I traveled through is in plain sight in a busy area. I think there would be a high probability that some-body would accidentally bump into it and fall through. (Especially if there have been one thousand years of opportunities, what with it opening like clockwork every 30 moons.) At Equestria's end, it was in the Canterlot Throne Room. At the Canterlot High end, people disappearing into a glossy wall right in front of the school would have created a buzz that would have attracted the Sirens.
I wonder if Star Swirl temporarily blinded the Sirens prior to leading them through the gateway and then moved the gateway at the Canterlot High end so they couldn't find it in the short swings of Canterlot High time? The best way would be to move it magically from one glossy surface to another in the Canterlot High World.
As for learning more about this puzzle without performing tests, such as removing Sunset Shimmer's tether, I fear I may be out of luck. Princess Celestia is very vague about the nature of this gateway and the world it leads to. She does know much that she doesn't reveal, as part of her way of nurturing all of Equestria and shaping events. But I fear that Star Swirl the Bearded's notes about it are either lost, hidden or misfiled.
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Annual Biome Management Conference
April 4: In a few days I'll be accompanying Fluttershy and Amethyst Star to the annual Biome Management Conference. It's a two day conference and this year it's being hosted by the Crystal Empire. Ponies responsible for the wild fauna and flora from all across Equestria will be attending.
Fluttershy and Amethyst Star have their hibernation and migration data tabled and collated and all set to be submitted. I was at Fluttershy's cottage today and the three of us were going through the conference program guide, picking out interesting round tables, events and presentations to attend. There will be ponies sharing data, teaching theory and demonstrating practical techniques! Fluttershy is excited and nervous. I'm just excited. Amethyst is taking it all in stride.
I will be there mostly for moral support, but I do intend to spend time browsing the Crystal Empire Library as well. There are a lot of books I'd like to borrow. I'll also slip out at some point for tea with Princess Cadence and my brother.
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Pre-Conference Preparations, Check!
April 5: My saddle bags are all packed for the Biome Management Conference. I'll stop by Fluttershy's cottage to pick her up and we'll trot down together to the Ponyville train station where we'll meet up with Amethyst Star. We'll be taking the early train to the Crystal Empire and we should arrive in time to register before the first presentations start. Spike is on pet-sitting duty.
The conference is being held in several of the state rooms and halls in the castle. Most of the conference guests will be housed in the complex build to accommodate the athletes for the Equestria Games, but Princess Cadence has found three rooms for us, so we'll be staying in the Castle.
I'm bringing a bag of Zecora's delicious and spicy chocolate peppermint tea to give to Cadence and Shining, and of course we're going to speculate about Star Swirl the Bearded's Canterlot High world!
It's two full days so we've decided to stay two nights. I should be back to my own bed three nights from now, unless I, or we, get called back early for an emergency1.
Time for a little light reading! I can't take all my books with me to the Crystal Empire. Well maybe if I cram them into my saddle bags just right I could, but then I might not be able to lift my bags.
1 Called back, by the Tree of Harmony. The Tree that build us this rock pony house, like we build bird houses, and gave us a magical boost when we most need it. It now helps us find and solve Harmony problems, somewhat like how we help out animals in the spring. That Tree.
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April 6: (attending a conference in the Crystal Empire)
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April 7: (The Princess is out, come back tomorrow)
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Walking the Wilds of the Crystal Empire
April 8: We're back from the Biome Management Conference. We caught the train this morning and we arrived around midday. Spike was very happy to see us. He was getting dogpiled by squirrels, mice and bunnies and looking a little worse for wear. I think he was mostly happy that Fluttershy was back so he could stop pet-sitting. Owlowiscious was watching the whole affair from a high perch in Fluttershy's cottage with an 'I told you so' look. Or maybe he was just sleepy and I'm imagining things.
The Conference was fun. I sat in on a few talks with Fluttershy and Amethyst Star and I went on the field trip with them as well. The field trip was very popular with the conference guests as it was the first time any of them had seen the wild areas around the Crystal Empire. We were in ten groups of fifteen.
Fluttershy had her pith helmet and her binoculars at the ready, Amethyst Star had collection jars and keys to the flora of the taiga and I had a few guide books. Walking on a raised bog is like walking on a giant mattress! We saw some lovely abstract red and green picture plants, brilliant yellow (and sticky) sundoes, and fur-leaf tea. Amethyst gathered some so I can give a bag full to Zecora. Fur-leaf tea doesn't grow around Ponyville.
It's early spring so it's still fairly chilly and breezy, which is just as well. The moss key toads were sluggish and less prone to bite. When it gets warmer, the moss key toads are so ferocious that they drive the crystal hares to congregate in areas of bare rock. We were told that on sunny days you can sometimes see big gatherings of crystal hares sparkling from leagues away.
While Fluttershy and Amethyst attended workshops, I went to the library to read, and yesterday I had tea with Princess Cadence and Shining Armor. We talked at length about Star Swirl the Bearded, the Sirens and Sunset Shimmer's chance tether, but all we could do was speculate1. I didn't find any books on the subject in the Crystal Empire Library either.
It's good to be back. I think I'll turn in early.
1 For instance, the gateway opens to a place heavily populated by Ponyville alternative beings. Could Star Swirl have had an experimental lab here, somewhere in or near Ponyville, back when it was very far from all pony habitations? I could see that he'd want to be far from everypony for safety reasons when testing powerful spells. Meanwhile, I've written to Sunset Shimmer outlining the danger I think she may be in. She may or may not share my view. If she does, it would be hard to leave the Canterlot High world with the expectation that the friends that you made there will return to living a short time swing until they vanish, and that they could forget that you ever existed. If she doesn't, the Canterlot High world is a fascinating place. Either way, I don't expect her to ask me to open the gate any time soon.
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Planning Out Rabbitat
April 9: Now that I'm back I'm trying to catch up on my reading. We should be having another potluck supper soon, probably at Rarity's boutique. It will depend on everypony being up for it. What should I make?
Applejack has been working long hours tilling fields, planting and weeding. The lion's share was done as part of Winter Wrap Up, but there's still plenty to keep the Apple family busy.
Dash is off on Wonderbolts Reserves duty, but she'll be back tomorrow. She has weather duty in Ponyville too and Applejack isn't going to be too pleased if her fields and orchards don't get watered on time.
Rarity should be making a run to Manehattan soon with an order of spring formal wear and to touch base with Coco Pommel. I think Pinkie Pie has been stashing long thin balloons everywhere for "balloon animal emergencies".
Fluttershy has high hopes for kits from her jackalope pair. She's added willow and poplar trimmings to the options in the diet of the animals she has under close husbandry. She's looking for areas around her cottage where she can plant some pioneer trees and bushes and boost her primary productivity. Preferably near a stand of mature trees1. And she's going to make a few brush piles. A good balance of interspersed cover types and early succession woody plants along grassy areas makes for good rabbitat.
1 An ecotone, also called an edge, is where two ecosystems meet, such as a pond and a field, or a forest and a field. Along the edge, not only do you have a higher diversity of plant growth because it is getting seeded from both ecosystems, it is a place where an ecosystem is often transitioning from one community to another. This transition is called ecological succession and in the case of forests, involves pioneer plants that bunnies like to eat. Thus "rabbitat".
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Tea in the Clouds
April 10: Rainbow Dash got back from her Wonderbolts Reserve duties earlier today, and after the clouds had cleared I flew up to knock on her door. We talked a bit about our next potluck over hot apple cinnamon spice tea. Rainbow Dash makes hers with extra sugar and lemon juice to give it extra kick.
The Wonderbolts tour involved a lot of drilling and flying in close formation to better combine shockwaves when making cyclone strikes and sheer sweeps. Flying in formation also conserves power during long flights as they ride the slipstream of the lead flyer and each pegasus takes turns being in the lead.
After I left Rainbow Dash I made a quick trip over to Zecora's hut to give her the fur leaf tea leaves from the Crystal Empire. I had suggested to Pinkie that we invite her to the potluck supper and by the time I got there, Zecora had already received her invitation. It will be on the day after tomorrow at Rarity's Carousel Boutique and she'll be there.
My invitation was glittering on my writing desk on my return.
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Creature Comforts
April 11: I spent most of the day sprawled out with a half dozen books on my little sandy patch in the east fields. It was sunny and warm with the occasional distracting butterfly and bird. I felt I could almost see the grass growing. I had my picnic blanket to keep the sand out of my books, but little bits of fluff would blow in every so often and settle in the windshadow they cast. Then I noticed an ant colony diligently excavating their tunnels, grain by grain. No way was I going to get any reading done. I went home.
When I got back, I found Rainbow Dash and Applejack in the mane hall playing Ring Fling. They were tied at four games a piece, best out of five. I pulled up a cushion and got back to reading while they fought it out point by point, best out of seven.
I forgot to notice who won. It was probably a tie.
We should really do this more often.
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Pot Luck at Rarity's
April 12: Pot Luck supper went off without a hitch and it was fun and filling. We're still a ways from the first cut of haying season so a lot of the food is from our winter stores. The zap apples aren't due to come into leaf for a few days yet, but there are already a few spring greens to be found.
Spike and I made a lemon poppy seed bread. It was delicious and we served it still hot, that way the butter melted on the slices. Fluttershy made a trout-lily, cattail shoot salad, decorated with spring beauty flowers. Applejack's contribution was dandelion greens and grated carrot salad with little apple cubes. Zecora brewed a spicy currant sauce, poured on chocolate ice cream and served with whipping cream on top. Rarity brought a corn pudding souffle, Rainbow Dash brought a tub of rainbow sherbet and Pinkie brought a huge batch of rock candy. Spike ate most of that.
We set up a game of Bundle of Sticks. Zecora beat us all. She has a very steady and careful reach, and always seems to know which stick to pull. Dash kept going for the high score sticks even though we'd often warn her to try for something more strategic. I think she was teasing us, it did put all eyes on her when it was her turn. That game was a lot of fun.
We chatted about the smells of spring, how the air seemed to be alive with sound after the whispering quiet of the winter winds, and how the touch of the soil has lifted the spirits of everypony. All that's lacking is the swish and taste of hock-high pasture in the early morning dew.
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Leftovers
April 13: This morning we all went over to Rarity's to help her carry her things to the train station. She was off for a day trip to Manehattan with a spring formal wear order for a client there. She's going to meet up with Coco Pommel who will help her deliver it. It's a quick trip so she should be back by now. Deliver her wares, lunch with Coco, then back on the evening train.
I went into my library room to read up on the effect of vibration on plant growth and the day just flew by. I'm eating some of the left-overs from the pot-luck supper: Applejack's salad between two slices of toasted lemon poppy seed bread! It's good.
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Coco Pommel
April 14: I remembered that today is when my friends usually go to the spa. I met up with Fluttershy in the waiting room and we chatted about rabbitat while we waited for Rarity and Pinkie to arrive. They soon trotted in together and Rarity was wearing a new hat that was really nice. It was an open crown hat with a deep dusky rose bow ribbon band and a very wide brim traced with concentric circles.
While we were in the sauna, Rarity told us about her lunch with Coco Pommel, the mare who gave her her Element Key and who Rarity hired to make costumes for a Bridleway production on her behalf in Manehattan.
Coco is still busy making costumes for Rarity's Bridleway friend. It's hard work but Coco is fast and very talented and she has had some of her costume design ideas adopted by Rarity's friend. Coco's reputation has been growing and the word has gotten around between different costume designers. They have been offering her work left and right. There's even been a bidding war for her time! She's looking to hire helpers to keep up.
Coco has an eye on returning to fashion wear, especially practical clothes that makes a mare look elegant, not showy. She plans on entering this year's Fashion Week contest, probably with a line of hats. She gave Rarity the hat she was wearing today. If all her hats are that nice, she's going to turn some heads.
After the sauna I had a good long soak in the mineral bath. It really feels good on my hooves. It softens them up and makes them feel more springy. Sometimes in the winter they get so hard and dry that I get small cracks and I have to dab ointment on them. Of course, if I went to the spa more often, like Fluttershy and Rarity, my hooves would look as nice as theirs. But I get to reading and looking things up, and then I forget to go.
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Fixing Holes That Kept My Mind From Wandering
April 15: This afternoon I caught up with Applejack and Big McIntosh in the orchard. They were tidying up around the trees and filling the few dozen extra holes I'd dug for them the other day, seeing as they didn't have enough apple tree saplings to plant in all of them.
That was a bit awkward.
While I helped fill in the holes, Apple Bloom got home from school and was about to high-tail it for her clubhouse. I told her that since the result they had had working together last time had been so promising, this week when she and her friends came over for instruction, we were going to try and grow another acorn, but make it bigger. It's only a few days away, so they should be practicing their skills and not forget their supplies. By that point she was so excited she was a red and yellow streak racing over the hill towards the clubhouse. Applejack and Big McIntosh were grinning like... something to do with squirrels, herding, and a corn seed mattress.
There are still no leaves on the zap apple trees.
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The Timber Wolves Were Howling
April 16: I went over to the bowl left in the ground where the Golden Oak Library had stood. On my way there three different ponies stopped me to tell me that the timber wolves had been howling in the wee hours of the morning. Zap apple season has arrived.
The bowl was perfect for a growth spell. The ground is still dug up and there wasn't anything there that further upheaval would damage. I flew off to Sweet Apple Acres to see the trees.
Applejack and Big McIntosh had started to set up baskets for the harvest that was due in four days from now. Tomorrow they expect an early morning electrical storm to blow in from the Everfree. That will cause the zap apple trees to sprout leaves, at which point the Apples will start watering the zap apple trees.
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Preparations
April 17: Tomorrow is the day the fillies work in concert during their lessons and try to again to shape an oak as it grows, this time in the open air. If it works, it will take the castle hall out of the equation.
Since Apple Bloom's contribution is the growth potion, I invited Zecora to come watch. Zecora has a vast knowledge of potions and she could suggest improvements. Then I went into town to get three hard hats, visors and lab coats for the fillies. Everything should be fine, nothing should explode, or catch fire. I hope.
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Let's Take it From the Top
April 18: Today I was back again at where my Ponyville home once stood. I didn't have time to dwell on that, I had three excited fillies to coordinate, and somehow, a small crowd of onlookers. I had invited Fluttershy and Zecora, but it seems that word had spread of this magical experiment and the entire foal population was watching as well. They were a bit noisy at first and I was afraid they would break the fillies' focus, but Cheerilee also dropped by, and between her and Zecora's pointed looks, they kept it down to a low buzz.
Zecora was there for the potion aspect and she was interested in seeing how her breathing exercise had become humming scales. Fluttershy's interest is in the reforestation potential and building a better bird house.
All three fillies marched into the center of loose earth where the Golden Oak had once stood. Dressed in their lab coats, hard hats and safety visors, they started setting up their demonstrations. Although they had been hamming it up for their friends in the crowd, they were starting to look nervous now that the moment of truth had arrived.
They had brought their materials, but with some differences from the last time Apple Bloom had sprouted an acorn.
Apple Bloom's glassware had an added distillation and titration stage that didn't look necessary to me. She also had many more flasks, some containing liquids that looked suspiciously like apple juice, pond water and mud.
Sweetie Belle came equipped with twelve sparkling sapphires and this time Scootaloo's large mound of odds and ends included forks and pinwheels. I was beginning to think the experiment was going to fail. But the lesson would not be lost.
Apple Bloom was busy connecting glassware, Scootaloo was rapidly building a base out of her eccentric collection of odds and ends, and Sweetie Belle was already gritting her teeth as she attempted to levitate all twelve sapphires at once.
I stopped Sweetie Belle to remind her to find her focus first, and to levitate the sapphires one after the other, as if they were on a string. Breathe in. Breathe out. Clear. Focus.
My focus was broken by Apple Bloom searching madly for an acorn in her bag and flinging flasks into the air. I caught those before they smashed. Some fillies in the crowd were laughing (cut short by a stern look from Zecora). I had brought an acorn. Apple Bloom took it sheepishly. She made a mud, apple juice, pond water puddle and stuck the acorn into it.
Scootaloo's scrap sculpture fell over, making us all jump, including Sweetie Belle. She had been counting her breaths. I tried to explain the breathing exercise again. Many of the foals in the crowd had become bored and had run off.
Apple Bloom's potion, or potions, were bubbling, condensing, getting titrated, combined, and filling the collector poised above the acorn. The foals left in the crowd pressed closer.
Scootaloo's contraption was now looking quite a bit more sturdy with extra spokes on the inside loopdehoop and with a fork attached to each ear horn. She was screwing metal wafers to the outer hoop. It really looked like abstract art made out of junk.
Sweetie Belle was starting to get the hang of the breathing. A first sapphire twitched and rose up, followed by another. A third twitched.
Apple Bloom watched the color of the potion in her final condenser darken, her hoof poised over the valve.
Scootaloo took a step back, looked at what she had built, put a few drops of oil on a pivot, and gave it a gentle push. The pinwheels caught the breeze and twirled.
Sweetie Belle had all twelve sapphires following each other in a circle in mid-air. They wavered a bit, then moved into a figure-eight pattern. Sweetie Belle remembered to breathe.
Apple Bloom opened the valve. A big dark green drop of liquid fell onto the acorn. It sprouted immediately.
Scootaloo's metal hoops turned lazily and silently.
Sweetie Belle started to hum as she made the sapphires spin while they carved a figure eight in the air above her head. A chromatic scale. Scootaloo's hoops picked up speed, going faster with each note and echoing them. In the crowd, all eyes were on Apple Bloom's sapling oak. Some of them were humming too.
The oak sapling was growing fast and round, as it had in the castle hall. This time the tree grew as large as a barrel before a collective gasp and cheer from the foals sent three branches growing up like corn stalks five pony lengths into the air. Distracted, Sweetie Belle dropped her sapphires. The tree stopped growing and a single leaf sprouted from each branch. Scootaloo's hoop-thing went silent but kept spinning.
The roots on the barrel tree were so shallow that when Scootaloo leaned on it while posing for pictures, it fell over and smacked Zecora and Fluttershy over the back. The barrel is hollow.
The experiment was a success. The fillies have already put it behind them. We'll do something else next time.
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Fine Tuning
April 19: Fluttershy dropped in to see me about the fillies' tree growing experiment. Now that she had seen it for herself, she had hopes that the Biome Management Association could put together a team of ponies to fine tune the process. She had met up with Amethyst Star and together they are going to hammer out a proposal. It will probably take ponies with expertise in making musical spells. The two of them are going to get Zecora's input as well, to see to what degree Apple Bloom's potion was responsible for the sapling's receptivity to Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle's harmonics.
There will be, of course, an ethics review board on the procedure.
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Zap Apple Harvest
April 20: The zap apples are ripe and Applejack and Big McIntosh have been harvesting them since this morning. By tomorrow the apples they haven't yet picked will be gone.
I went over to help. They have to be hoof-picked one by one, so it's a slow process. I flew up to pick the top-most apples, but I'm a slow picker and it was tiring. By afternoon I was pretty drained. I kept bumping into the trees. After the third time a tree zapped me, I was past ready to call it a day. Applejack and Big McIntosh are still at it, and Apple Bloom is helping out.
Spike and I have a dozen fresh zap apples for supper, fruit of the first harvest of the year.
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Getting the Massage
April 21: Today is the day Rarity and Fluttershy usually meet at the spa. As I was still sore from picking zap apples, I went too.
I brought five zap apples, two for the spa ponies, one for Rarity, one for Fluttershy, and a spare. While I waited with Fluttershy for Rarity to arrive, I gave the two zap apples to the spa ponies and ordered the massage treatment. Rarity arrived and I gave them each an apple too.
Fluttershy has been busy with Amethyst Star preparing the tree shaping proposal. They are worried it might not pass the scrutiny of the Ethics Board. There is the perpetual concern of accidentally creating another parasprite or poison joke. Or a whipping willow. It's not always easy to keep such things restrained to the Everfree Forest.
When they have it all prepared and typed out, Amethyst Star will take care of the correspondence as well as any delegations from the Biome Management Association.
That massage and soak in the hot tub did me a world of good. I'm still tired but at least I'm not still sore.
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Zap Apple Jam Methodology
April 22: Earlier this afternoon Apple Bloom brought me five jars of zap apple jam. She was very proud to tell me that she had helped Granny Smith in the jam making and had kept careful notes of all the steps and procedures necessary to making good zap apple jam. It seems that even the zap apples themselves can be very particular when it comes to being transformed.
Note taking is important if she's to develop her potion making skills. I should get her a wax canvas field notebook. With a snap strap to hold it closed and a pencil holder. Come to think of it, all three fillies should have notebooks where they keep track of their successes and failures, to thus build better methodology.
I've added it to my check list of things to order.
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Book Order
April 23: It's high time I ordered some new books from Random Horse Publishing for my Library Annex in this castle. The Observer's Guide to Equestrian Rodents looks useful, as does Potshards of the Paleopony Period; I must read The Eight Enchanted Items of Mage Meadowbrook again; here's a good companion book to go with it: Eastern Unicorn Pony Protocol, Policy and Politics; more must-have reference books: Sustainable Arid Pasture and Silviculture; The Economics of Sharing Pasture with Sheep, Cows and Goats; The Great Equestria Lexicon of Colloquialisms (oh my yes!); and finally, the latest edition of The Astronomical Astronomer's Almanac to All Things Astronomy, to replace the book Spike sneezed on.
Some frivolous light reading would be good too. Pace Speculation, Zebra Science Fiction, Dell Neigh often have good books. Or another volume from Pasture Ffjord's bookworld detective series where off duty fictional ponies step out of their books and visit other fictions. There's the many Hairy Thatchet's Flying Plate World books too.
I've read about The Cutie Mark of Dorein Bay by Ostler Wild. Seems it was scandalous when it was first published. Maybe I should order that too.
Tomorrow I'll send Spike to Quills and Sofas for more quills. I'm down to the smaller secondary feathers from my spring molt. They break easily and they don't make very good quills anyway. Also scrolls and three wax canvas field notebooks for the fillies.
That reminds me. None of you seem to have caught the Harness in Wanderland riddle I cribbed back when I was shedding all over the place. There are so many parallels between our worlds that I suspect that if I searched, I could find your equivalent to that book. You should read it! It's a classic!
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White Horses of Spring
April 24: I went for a walk through some fresh puddles of water after the early morning rain shower today. It feels great to get my hooves wet, they get so soft and springy. I resisted the urge to gallop through the streets like a wild thing, cascading everypony and everything in my path with great spouts of water and leading a stampede of white horses through the soaking wet pastures, just for the unbridled joy of it all. I could read the words of The Hayloft Song of J. Alfalfafed Poolrock in my mind...
Let us gallop, you and I,
When evening has spread over Celestia's sky
Like a salt-drunk pinto sprawled on a table;
Let us trot, to where pastures and forest meet,
Grass whispering at our feet
Of uneven ground hiding pitfall wells
And grazing soured by wood sorrels...
Another sure sign that it's spring is that it's Hearts and Hooves day.
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Zap Apple Brunch
April 25: It was a bit of a wet and grey spring day today and I have those jars of zap apple jam, so early on I met up with Pinkie Pie and I suggested a late brunch at the Castle. Pinkie was off in a gasp, delivering invitations. I hurried to the baker to get fresh bread and to Sugarcube Corner for cinnamon rolls.
I got back home and nearly jumped out of my skin when a confetti cannon blasted me with an invitation just inside the front door. Pinkie had come up with a zap apple spring theme. Everypony was due to arrive in a few hours.
I had Spike cook up a few dozen biscuits. I put out cups, saucers, plates, butter, jam, spoons and knives, got out comfortable cushions for seven, and the games.
By the time the biscuits were cooked and the tea brewed, they started to arrive. Pinkie brought balloons, Fluttershy spring flowers, Applejack brought zap apples, Rainbow Dash found some pussy willows and Rarity, airy spring foulards. Each of Rarity's foulards was a different color for each of us and printed with our cutie marks, an emerald flame pattern for Spike. She'd been planning this. Spike wore his like a cravat and put on a sophisticated air.
Everything was delicious and the conversations infectious. The hours just melted away. We never did start any of the games.
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Force Fields and Air Resistance
April 26: A lot of pony magic comes from our ability to navigate our non-Euclydean environment and our two dimensions of time. It allows us to stick to objects with our hooves, lever very large objects through the air, to fly, to walk on clouds, all by negotiating increments of distance. With the same force, a pony or an object has an infinite number of choices of distances. Thus a small force that shouldn't move an object, can, if you choose the right path. And similarly, a pony can control the resistance of the air and water, allowing for flight and walking on clouds. Van der Waals adherence is a function of twisting microscopic distances between surfaces so that enough of the hoof touches the handle/wall/ceiling to stick. Some ponies do these things better than others, and it usually takes practice.
Making a force field or a hard air bubble is an extension of this magic. Air is a lot of gas molecules bouncing around in random directions with a lot of space between each molecule. To get the air to stop moving, a unicorn must alter random paths of gas molecules to expand into a cloud of probable locations, thus occupying more space, becoming larger, and locking in with each other to form a amorphous solid of super-sized gas molecules. This is different from the pegasus approach of increasing air resistance by reducing the path air molecules travel with each applied force (wing beat).
Theoretically, an earth pony or a pegasus could stamp or wing a shock wave of solid air. That wall would dissipate the instant they moved.
Like with glass (which is a non-magical amorphous solid), light goes through but solids and gases are blocked. Gas exchange through the barrier could occur slowly through swapping. This could be useful for underwater exploration, maybe as a cylinder that's open at the top. It would require using weights to reduce buoyancy.
Rapid growth magic is a combination of squeezing and pulling cells and taking advantage of the second dimension of time. Earth ponies are particularly good at this, although I can grow a mustache on a pony by getting skin cells to die in columns. That takes some rather tricky mental folding.
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True Blue Grit
April 27: I met up with Rarity, Applejack and Pinkie Pie for muffins and tea at Sugarcube Corner today. I told Applejack I was thinking of tasking Apple Bloom to make long chain molecules from plant sources, like reeds or wood. With long chain strands you can make just about any shape.
As for Sweetie Belle, I told Rarity that she was getting good juggling small items, so I want to increase the difficulty and get her make patterns in colored sand, as a way toward visualizing moving air molecules, either as a shock wave or a shield. All I lacked was the sand. So I asked Rarity to dye some sand for me in different colors. Rarity had a better idea.
We went over the the Carousel Boutique with some sand, which she dyed, but she also pulverized some gem stones into sparkly grit and crushed some semi precious rocks too, for variety. As she looked down at the platters of sparkling grit, I could see the flash of inspiration in her eyes. I think she's going to incorporate gem stone grit into cloth for extra sparkle. Sapphire Shores is going to be blinding.
Pinkie got in on the task too. Pinkie knows rocks. She even makes rock candy from rocks (how does that work?!). Now I have quite a lot of colored sand in various jars. All the colors of the rainbow, plus white, black, brown and grey.
I stashed the jars of sand and grit in a cupboard at the castle (and I told Spike not to eat them) and I went calling on Zecora. Over a cup of fur-leaf tea from the raised bogs of the Crystal Empire (it's not bad), I explained what I had in mind for Apple Bloom. Zecora wrote out a few procedures for extracting polymerizing compounds from woody sources for Apple Bloom to try.
Now, what to have Scootaloo try? Maybe have her build something from components she makes herself, from scratch. Like a composite material.
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Nothing But Blue Skies
April 28: A few flakes off a nice sweet sun-dried bale of second-cut timothy hay to settle the stomach (after one too many cupcakes), a few good books, a comfortable cushion, blue skies above, Ponyville far below, and that was my day, up on the larger balcony of the Treecastle.
I need a new telescope.
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Slumber 201
April 29: I should do another sleep over. My copy of Slumber 101: All You've Ever Wanted to Know About Slumber Parties But Were Afraid to Ask is gone, but with some help, I think I could pull one off. I just need to convince at least some of my friends to do a slumber party. To make memories in this new castle.
I was thinking it would be fun to throw a surprise party for Pinkie Pie some time soon. Fun, but really hard.
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Books, Fresh From the Printing Press
April 30: The books I'd ordered from Random Horse Publishing arrived this morning. It was a good time as any to re-shelve my athenaeum. Then I leafed through The Astronomical Astronomer's Almanac to All Things Astronomy.
There will be significant meteor shower in about a hundred days from now, issuing from the Celestia's Boot constellation. Celestia's Boot, which will appear to be just south of Canterlot when viewed from Ponyville, is a pretty reliable reference in the sky. Unlike some constellations, such as the Ursa Major, it doesn't move around or go for walks in the Everfree. The best time to watch that meteor shower will be well before sunrise.
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Twilight's Blog | V May | Devious Plans
May 1: I went calling on Rainbow Dash with my idea to throw a surprise party for Pinkie. At first she wasn't too keen on the idea, seeing how hard it was to keep Pinkie in the dark and how depressed she became when she found us all avoiding her last time we tried to throw a surprise party for her. But when I outlined my plan, Rainbow Dash was all for it. Rainbow Dash likes a good prank, and throwing a surprise party for a surprise-party-pony like Pinkie Pie is hard to beat.
One way to surprise Pinkie is to enlist outside help. Rainbow Dash is going to use her connections to track down Cheese Sandwich and today I wrote to Pinkie Pie's sister Maud Pie. Maud is on a rock research trip in the Galloping Gorge (which cuts through the Equestrian Shield) where she is gathering data for her rocktorate in rock science. I want Maud to be a surprise in the surprise. The date that we choose to throw this party will depend on her availability. That's the when. There is also the where and how to roll in the surprises in waves. I need to speak to Rarity next. She's good with theater.
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Voice of Fire
May 2: Overall, I think the lesson with Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo and Apple Bloom went well.
Apple Bloom followed Zecora's instructions and turned chopped reeds into a goopy smelly liquid that shot out of her flask, ignited, and stood for an instant as a red and blue column of flame that just about touched the ceiling of the grand hallway. Scootaloo was enthralled. She calls it Apple Bloom's Voice of Fire. That was not the intended result. I was expecting an epoxy glue.
Scootaloo's project is to design and build a better trailer for her scooter. The one she has is very sturdy, but it isn't light or attractive. I told her that with laminated plant fibers, she can take the sturdy frame of her trailer, cut out the extra weight while retaining key structural components, and build a light weight chassis over that. She gave me a blank look. OK. Trying again, I said, draw some pictures of what the most awesome, and cool, (and something else, I can't remember what it was Dash says), trailer would look like. Then take apart a spare trailer and put enough of it back together so that holds together and can carry a full load. Next, on that frame, weave a mesh structure based on the best drawing. The plant fibers will be laminated to the mesh structure with Apple Bloom's epoxy. Paint comes last.
She made several drawings. I think that soon she is going to need a wind chamber.
Sweetie Belle sweated hard over the sand and grit. It's not easy getting that many tiny rocks to move at the same time. The tourmaline grit is quite pretty, so she took that jar home with her to practice on.
I gave each of them their very own wax canvas field notebooks so they can track their progress, work out problems and build on their discoveries. Scootaloo has started hers with her design ideas for her 'cool' trailer; Apple Bloom has Zecora's procedures written out with notes as to where it was she probably went wrong; Sweetie Belle's notebook has a series of squiggly lines that mean something to her, I think a kind of combination of musical and magical notation, by feel.
After that, we celebrated out on the smaller balcony with bowls of vanilla oat swirl ice cream and called it a day. Or I called it a day. They ran off to do something or other. I spread my wings and sunbathed.
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This Will Be No Picnic
May 3: Cheese Sandwich is hard to find. Where he's been is easy enough, he leaves a trail of confetti in every town, village, hamlet and watering hole he visits. Rainbow Dash is still inquiring but it isn't easy. We'd have to know the whereabouts of a party that is needed before it happens.
I had a chat with Rarity. She likes the 'chain of surprises' plan. For the kernel, innocuous activity, Rarity thinks a picnic is hard to beat. Pinkie wouldn't miss a picnic if she can help it and we can set the date of the picnic with her, just making sure that the day we pick is the day Maud can show up.
I was thinking Maud could be the first surprise, but Rarity threw cold water on that. When Maud arrives, Pinkie might be too distracted with catching up with her sister to notice any of the other surprises.
Rarity had an idea. She suggested we ask Mayor Mare to declare a Picnic in the Fields day, that way the day will be fixed in advance. I didn't think that would quite work since we are planning Pinkie's surprise party, and inviting the town to a Picnic Event would confuse ponies. Many would wonder if we were trying to hijack the community picnic. But getting the town to attend the surprise party would be a plus. That could be the final surprise.
I left Rarity to work out the sequence some more. This event is going to require timing and coordination. I should speak to Fluttershy to see if she has any furry or feathered friends who could act as messengers.
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The Elusive Cheese
May 4: One of Dash's contacts spotted Cheese Sandwich! Seems his 'cheesy sense' is telling him that Ponyville is calling, but this time he doesn't know when to arrive. He left a return address, and if I my letter doesn't catch him before he leaves, he's going to leave a forwarding address.
I wrote to him right away, explaining that it's a 'string of surprises' surprise party, and that he's one of the surprises. The tricky part is that it's Pinkie Pie we want to surprise, so we need to plan well. The date depends on when Pinkie's sister can come to town. More details to follow...
I explained the plan to Fluttershy. Fluttershy doesn't like getting startled by surprises, but since she's in on the surprise, it won't be too startling, and Pinkie does like surprises. She also likes the chain of events concept and how it could be considered open air theater. So she's in.
Fluttershy suggested that maybe, if the town participated, they could sing? 'Happy surprise party' or something? A Flash Mob! If we could pull that off! Fluttershy is going to see with Rarity and the Ponytones if they can find enough ponies to pull off something like that. Maybe singing a tune everypony knows, like something from Hinny of the Hills or some other Bridleway musical.
It's beginning to look like the setting is going to be a picnic in a popular picnic spot. And yes, Fluttershy thinks she can rely on several of her feathered and fuzzy friends to deliver messages.
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Salt In My Tea
May 5: I was feeling a bit antsy and snappish, so I joined Rarity and Fluttershy at the Spa this morning. Pinkie wasn't there. I think she and Dash were out pranking Applejack, putting newsprint in her hatband and attaching noise makers to the crankshafts of her wagons. They also switched my salt and sugar and hid a party cannon in my current reading pile. Those nuts. Thankfully, I salted my tea and got covered in confetti after the spa.
Even though Pinkie Pie wasn't there, we didn't discuss her surprise party. Ponyville is a small town. Word can spread very quickly.
After the spa I dropped in on Applejack to let her in on the plan and to get her up to speed. It would be great if she could cook up a bunch of treats for the crowd. We discussed Maud Pie and how to get her to the picnic without Pinkie seeing her. Applejack thinks she could build a crate for Maud that Rarity could decorate as a gift box. One way or another, Big McIntosh could be helpful carting Maud from the train station to the picnic.
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Waiting for Word
May 6: No word yet from Maud. Delivery of a letter addressed to "Maud Pie, Galloping Gorge, Equestria" must be a bit of a challenge. It's also a challenge to cook up enough food for a surprise party and to deliver it into an open pasture without the guest of honor noticing. We need a cake too. That requires baking, a lot of baking, right under Pinkie's nose.
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Brainstorming Session
May 7: Scroll and quill in hoof, Rarity, Rainbow Dash and I held a brainstorming session in the Carousel Boutique. These are the elements we need to assemble and orchestrate:
Maud Pie
Cheese Sandwich
A group picture, signed, framed, as a spur of the moment gift.
Suddenly singing ponies converging on Pinkie
Sky writing: 'Pinkie Pie' and 'Surprise'.
Sonic Rainboom? (no, will blow everything over)
Food, "catered to" and then delivered by various ponies, such as maybe Lyra, Cheerilee + school, Lily, Amethyst Star, Minuette... who turn up on cue
Decorations
Party cannons?
Music
Messaging/cues
Transportation of surprise guests and food.
If the Cakes could "cater" to several ponies, and those ponies carry the food in baskets to their "picnics" that just so happen to be near ours, that would solve the food transportation problem. On cue, they would walk from their picnic blankets to Pinkie, bearing food.
Once we had spread our picnic blanket we could start by giving the picture to Pinkie. While she's wondering why, Dash's Wonderbolt Reserves could write Pinkie Pie in the sky. While she's still wondering why, singing ponies converge and now the pegasi continue to write: Surprise! The song ends and more ponies converge, this time with food. The sky now reads Pinkie Pie Surprise! Party. The cakes arrive with a big cake, Cheese Sandwich leaps out. Party chaos ensues, "All are invited" is written in the sky. Big McIntosh arrives with a very large gift box with Maud Pie inside. Last element: music. Provided by DJ Pon3.
We're going to need Cheese to pull this off. Otherwise, who knows how or where we'd hide the party hats and banners. Behind brush piles? We'd better leave that problem to Cheese.
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It's In the mail
May 8: I got a letter today from Maud Pie! Her reply was short and to the point: "Good idea. I will arrive at the Ponyville train station at noon in 14 days."
She wrote the letter three days ago, that leaves 11 days.
I sent the date and our party plan to Sandwich. We now have a deadline.
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Picking Up Speed
May 9: We're in a bit in that spot between steeplechase hurdles. We're gathering up for the leap over the baking obstacle, but we're waiting for Cheese to lean into the saddle. The Cakes are about due to call on Applejack for apples. I asked Applejack to explain the plan to them. They will know who would make good mules, ponies they often cater and who could smuggle in the party treats to our picnic.
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Ring Fling
May 10: Today the weather was chilly and rainy. After Rainbow Dash had finished organizing the downpour, she and Applejack dropped by for a few rounds of Ring Fling in the mane hallway. The stony silence of the Treecastle was broken by the wooden knock of one ring knocking another out of play and of the jocular mock anguish of the pony losing a round. I paused my reading on deception strategies in insects, got out a big pitcher of mint iced tea and three cups and went down to watch.
Rainbow Dash knows a few ponies who could do the sky writing, so that's a go. Applejack hasn't spoken to the Cakes yet, but she will do so soon. Either when they make their next apple order, or she'll find a reason to go the Sugarcube Corner on business.
After an hour of heavy competition, Dash went off to clear the clouds and Applejack headed back to the farm.
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Intermission
May 11: A pile of books, a balcony high above the hustle and bustle on the ground, blue skies and the day just flew right on by. Now the moon is up and the constellations are riding high. Time for some sleep.
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Seven Days
May 12: Another key piece to the Pinkie Plan fell into place today -- I received a letter from Cheese Sandwich. It was somewhat enigmatic. He wrote: "A surprise in a cake as pretty as you please, watch out Pinkie 'cause here comes the Cheese!" Nothing else, no details or plans. It looks like we're in for surprises too.
The surprise is next Tuesday. Time to start cooking.
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Working out the details
May 13: Applejack and the Cakes are calculating what they need to bake and when it needs to be baked. Items such as apple chips, beet pulp cookies and oatmeal swirl ice cream can be prepared now; other items such as the cream cheese icing and pies can be cooked a little later; and perishable food like carrot and turnip sticks and spring green salad have to be prepared last.
A Pinkie picnic surprise party should have food, right?
The Cakes have started to gently sound likely ponies to see if they'd be willing to serve as picnic food mules. They have a structure for hiding a pony in a cake, they just need to assemble it and to layer it with cake and icing. That's probably going to be the last thing they do. It's easier if Cheese is already in it when they apply the icing.
Zecora is in charge of the beverages.
Rarity and the rest of the Ponytones Quartet have chosen a song and have surreptitiously organized a crowd of singers. They can't do a rehearsal together, so each is practicing their parts at home.
I'm going to invite all five of my closest pony friends over for a "game night" evening after next. That will give me the chance to suggest a picnic and for us to plan it for Tuesday. I wonder if I could suggest to Pinkie that she cook up a big batch of her rock candy, with the idea that we could make rock candy necklaces during picnic, for fun.
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Thick as Thieves
May 14: So far, Lyra, Lily, Amethyst Star and Roseluck are in on the food wave part of the plan. The Cakes are having them drop by Sugarcube Corner to order various baked goods, all from a predetermined list. The Cakes have made a mental tab of what they will need to bake, and it doesn't get written down as a list until a "food mule" orders it. That way, to Pinkie, it looks like business as usual.
I've invited all five of my friends over for a game night here tomorrow night. Only Pinkie is unaware that it's to set the date for her picnic.
Wheels are spinning!
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Games Ponies Play
May 15: The whole gang was here. I set out alfalfa cubes, turnip sticks, apple chips and mint tea for us to snack on. Pinkie brought over a few jugs of her spring punch too. Soon we were chatting and laughing over games of Bundle of Sticks and Ring Fling.
I was trying to pull equal numbers of each color from the stack, Rarity looked to be strategically removing just the right sticks to leave the stack in an attractive climbing spiral pattern, Fluttershy seemed focused on rescuing the low-value sticks, and Pinkie looked to be snatching out the first stick she saw as fast as she could. Meanwhile, Dash and Applejack were making those felt-cushioned rings streak down the hall, whacking the opposing rings so hard they were bouncing off the walls. Spike was waiting to challenge the victor, and while he waited, finding where the rings flew off to.
I brought up the picnic idea. "Say, it's been a while since we've had a picnic, we should have one soon." There was a blur of pink next to me as Pinkie snatched out another stick. Somehow the pile remained standing. She spat out her stick (lips only, no horns, wings, tails or tongues!). "Ooh! A picnic! Let's have one tomorrow!"
My turn. I studied the pile. I needed another yellow one to make a perfect set. Or I could try for prime numbers instead. So circled the pile looking for a green stick. "Not tomorrow. I have the three fillies coming over to continue their private instruction. I think it's going to rain tomorrow as well. Dash?"
Dash was in mid swing. Her throw missed Applejack's ring; it bounced off a wall and would have flown out the front door if we hadn't closed it. "Aw shucks! Yes, there's a little spring shower planned for tomorrow. And another on Monday."
I found a likely looking green stick. Pinkie looked cross. "Two daytime showers? Why so often? Why can't it rain just at night?"
Applejack glided her third ring into a scoring position, slightly in front of her other ring in the bullseye. "Crops need waterin' That means small, frequent showers." Dash glared at Applejack's rings. "Yeah, and the pegasi mostly work during the day." She took careful aim.
I pulled out the green stick. The stack stood. I'm going to need 1 gold, 2 sapphire, 3 emerald, 5 ruby and 7 diamond for a perfect game. Rarity's turn.
Dash's ring slid noiselessly down the hall, hit both Applejack's rings with a hearty wooden 'crack', and all three rings went bouncing off the walls to the far end of the hall. The score was still zero-zero. Spike asked: "How about the day after tomorrow?" I'm going to let Spike in on the plan tomorrow.
While Rarity expertly extracted a white stick that was sticking out like a cowlick, Fluttershy replied. "Oh no, not then. That's bath day for the critters, I've scheduled the bear for a realignment for his back pain and there's the prenatal exam for the jackalope doe. I think they're finally going to have kits!"
Applejack took aim. Fluttershy studied the pile. Pinkie asked: "How about Tuesday? The Cakes have asked me to watch Pumpkin and Cup Cake in the morning, but I'm free all afternoon. We could make it a picnic lunch." (Victory!)
Applejack's ring stopped in the bullseye. Fluttershy delicately rescued a yellow stick with just a little lip tremor.
Picnic lunch next Tuesday was fine for everypony. I asked Pinkie if she had any rock candy. "Making rock candy necklaces next Tuesday in the sunshine would be fun." With at least three days for her to make rock candy, I think we're in for a lot of fun.
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Singing in the Rain
May 16: After the fillies had demonstrated their progress in their tasks (progress is slow, but it's there), I went for a stroll in the rain.
The raindrops made a pitter patter of tiny splashes on my back, slicked down my mane and ran down my face. It felt good. I closed my eyes as I walked, letting my memory guide me for several strides before I'd peek, just enough to adjust my course. The slick, fresh streets were mostly empty, but here and there through open windows I could hear bits of a song from Hinny of the Hills. The Ponytones have made their selection and I bet it's 'Just Live For Today'.
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Rock Slide
May 17: Picnic in two days! I don't think we've ever been so keen on a picnic before. I hope Pinkie doesn't find that suspicious.
Pinkie has been cooking up a small rock slide of candy, and getting underhoof while the Cakes rush about baking up all their orders. I told Pinkie we could show up at noon with Applejack's wagon to help ferry it all to the picnic. She thought that was a great idea. I also hinted that I thought there was more than enough rock candy here to keep us busy. About that, she wasn't so sure. This better not require two trips.
The other picnic groups are set to arrive before us and take the hilltops, leaving us a spot nestled between two rolling hills. Ponies prefer open spaces with a view, to see danger in time to run away. But we don't want Pinkie to see the surprises arriving, and the low spot make for a natural amphitheater, for open air theater.
With Pinkie foal-sitting it'll be hard for her to reserve a spot. And with all of us arriving together, choosing that low spot is going to be easier.
I mailed out a final letter yesterday to Cheese and Maud, confirming the date and time. Big McIntosh will pick up Maud Pie at the train station and the Cakes will be waiting for Cheese Sandwich at Sugarcube Corner.
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The Final Lap
May 18: Nearly everything that can be set is ready. Tomorrow we picnic in the east meadow.
Applejack built a gift box and Rarity made it look stunning. It's on Big McIntosh's cart and ready to roll to the train station. There's a sheet over it right now which is just as well -- it's so glittery that if the sun hits it, I think everypony clear across Ponyville will see it.
Today Applejack was delivering pies, fritters, and caramel apples to some of the 'food mules'. We might end up with too much food. Better to have too much than not enough.
The Cakes are on the cake phase of the bake off. They're making cupcakes, muffins, donuts and cakes today. The icing is already made, and as soon as the baked goods cool, they will get decorated. Except for the hollow cake for Cheese. They'll stack the frame with cake and puffed oat cubes and slather on the icing after Cheese is inside. They'll have to work fast, they have only one hour at most.
Checklist.
Maud Pie contacted and confirmed. Check.
Date set for picnic to coincide with Maud's arrival. Check.
Cheese Sandwich recruited and confirmed. Check.
Cakes recruited. Check.
Zecora recruited. Check.
Ponytones recruited. Check.
Skywriters recruited by Rainbow Dash. Check.
Fluttershy providing a messenger critter. Check.
Applejack providing extra treats. Check.
Maud-sized gift box. Check.
Big McIntosh to meet Maud at the train station. Check.
Rock candy. Check.
Keeping Pinkie occupied. Check.
Somehow keeping it a surprise. So far so good.
We dropped the group portrait idea. It's better to do that as group project, not as a surprise.
We are so close to the goal! The Map better not call us.
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A Surprise Party To End All Surprise Parties
May 19: We all arrived at nearly the same time at Sugarcube Corner, just as the Cakes were returning from their final delivery. Freed from her foal-sitting duty, Pinkie emerged with bowl after bowl of rock candy and stacked them in Applejack's cart. It all fit, but it made for a dazzling pile of rock candy, a full spectrum of sweet facets glittering in the sunlight. We were all a bit jittery as we tightened our saddlebags and hoisted our baskets. Just in time, I thought to ask Pinkie to bring her camera, waving my hoof in the general direction of the blinding kaleidoscope of rock candy. Pinkie zipped back inside and emerged victorious with her camera. All set, we made a bee-line for the east pasture.
There were a lot of ponies out picnicking. It looked like the whole town was there. Even the school was having a picnic. Applejack and Dash got distracted by a game of netball but fortunately I spotted our destination and got them on track. We tried to avoid running over ponies as we made our way past ponies sunning, eating, reading! (I tripped over Spike), rolling in the grass and generally relaxing.
We arrived and unloaded all the candy (I think drawing many eyes our way). While we set up our blanket, Applejack headed back to park the cart off the field, back the way we came. By the time she had returned, I had organized the bowls by wavelength into a glittering crescent and everything was ready. "Pinkie! Take a picture!" I suggested we make a necklace to wear before lunch. As we finished stringing rock candy, Pinkie snapped more pictures and Fluttershy released a blue jay that flown in to see her. Suddenly, somewhere in the crowd, a pony broke out in song.
Though fillies there be
Who never foresee
That the future holds anything pleasant;
Who grimly cast
Their eyes on the past,
And who gaze all aghast at the present!
The golden rule
For sage or fool,
For princess and pony and peasant,
Is, come what may,
At work or play,
To live, just live for today!
More and more ponies joined in and started walking toward us from all sides. It was fabulous. Pinkie was in shock. They were singing 'Just Live For Today' from Hinny of the Hills. Pinkie knew this song well, we'd all been to a private showing of Hinny of the Hills on Briddleway thanks to Rarity.
Sing hay! Sing ho!
There's no time like the present!
Sing ho! Sing hay!
There's no day like today!
They sang the entire song. They were at least fifty ponies strong by the final verse. I had trouble counting, I had tears in my eyes.
When a mare's depressed,
Not feeling her best,
She'll lament over yesterday's sorrow,
And brood, what's more,
On worries galore
That the fates have in store for the morrow.
Yet mares have power
From every hour
Some gleams of sunshine to borrow;
So don't delay
But find a way
To make the most of today!
Sing hay! Sing ho!
Take no thought for the morrow!
Sing ho! Sing hay!
Live, just live for today!
They ended by looking and pointing straight up. High above up us, two pegasi were spelling "PINKIE PIE" in huge letters made with clouds. There was a thunder of hooves pounding in applause all around, then suddenly more ponies sprang up bearing baskets and saddle bags stuffed with treats, plates and cups. The Cakes thought of everything. Zecora trotted up with a wagon. She brought the punch, the water and the iced tea. And she brought ingredients to make more.
The pegasi hadn't finished. I grabbed Pinkie and pointed at the sky. They were putting the finishing touches on the words "SURPRISE PARTY". Pinkie's mouth formed a huge "O". Then she started talking so fast I couldn't tell when one sentence ended and the next began. I caught a few words, like 'acting strange', 'so many', 'picnics everywhere' and 'cake'. Then the crowd parted as another cart crested the rise. The Cakes had arrived.
I slipped Pinkie's camera over to Rainbow Dash and whispered, "take pictures!" I'd have done it myself but I think Dash is better at it. Dash was way ahead of me. She had thought to ask a few photographer ponies to document the event, and through Scootaloo, Featherweight was on the job too. I think we'll end up with enough pictures for a scrapbook.
The Cakes, with their foals in their saddlebags and a giant cake in their cart, beamed as they pulled up in front of Pinkie. In the sky, the pegasi were putting the finishing touches to the last two words: "ALL INVITED". All around ponies cheered and started chanting: "Cut the cake! Cut the cake!"
Pinkie leaped up onto the front of the cart and held up a hoof for silence. In the quiet she pointed at a tag on the cake and announced, "Wait! There's something written here. It says, 'To give this party a special zing, let me out, pull my string!'"
In the crowd, a pony called out: "Pull it!"
Pinkie pulled the string, then dived for cover as the cake began to spin, throwing icing in all directions. In the center, out popped Cheese Sandwich wearing the lid like a hat, playing an accordion and firing party cannons. (I breathed a sigh of relief. He made it!)
Some of the cannons provided instant party decor, others confetti, streamers and balloons, and another tossed up a shower of party hats that floated down under parachutes. DJ Pon3 appeared like magic, her turntables spinning and her hoof ready on the needle. Cheese Sandwich gave Pinkie a hug, grabbed a microphone and made an announcement. "Hold your horses, mares, stallions and foals! Before we start this party for the Premier Party Pony of Ponyville, the Surprise Picnic Party to end all surprise parties," (loud cheers) "there is just one more surprise, and it's almost here!" He pointed and all eyes turned to Big McIntosh, yoked to his cart and steadily plowing through the crowd, straight to Pinkie. In his cart was the box Rarity and Applejack had built, hidden under a sheet.
Pinkie dashed through the crowd, grabbed the edge of the sheet and yanked it off. The natural amphitheater made by our chosen location magnified the "oohs" and "aahs" from all present. Big McIntosh came to a stop at our picnic blanket. Applejack called out, "Right on time." Big McIntosh replied, "Eyup."
"Open it Pinkie!" "What's inside?"
Pinkie Pie studied the sparkling box with mock gravity. She grabbed the giant ribbon with her teeth and gave it a tug. The box remained closed, but as the ribbon fell off, it revealed a door handle. Pinkie did the obvious thing, she knocked. "Come on out!" The door handle turned and Pinkie gasped and scooted away, falling on her back. The crowd caught its breath. Out stepped Maud Pie. "Surprise."
Pinkie sat down right there and burst into tears.
I think my heart stopped beating for a moment there. I think everypony's heart stopped. But then in an instant, Pinkie leaped up, grabbed her sister, grabbed the microphone and with tears still gushing, announced "This is the BEST SURPRISE PARTY EVER!" and bear-hugged everypony in sight. Cheese Sandwich set off a few fireworks to punctuate the fluffy white words written in the sky, Dj Pon3 applied a needle to a disk and the party started.
Cheese delivered a giant party. There was a food fight with cream pies. Rock candy necklace making event. Fireworks, some from Cheese, some from Zecora. A conga line a hundred ponies long with sprinkler fireworks (resulting in a lot of singed manes). Pinatas, games, balloon animals, cake juggling...
I'm all partied out and Spike is fast asleep, but through my small balcony door I can hear that this party isn't winding down anytime soon. I've kept my rock-candy necklace as a souvenir and I have another one I'll give to Pinkie tomorrow. As will each of us.
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The Morning After
May 20: The east meadow is littered with sleeping ponies in party hats and rock candy necklaces. Maud caught the morning train back to Galloping Gorge (wearing a fresh rock candy necklace, check!). Pinkie looked a little bleary eyed. Half my friends looked a little bleary eyed, but Maud looked as calm and steady as always. Dash was nodding off the whole time. I'll ask her tomorrow to round up the pictures. Already there are special editions of the Ponyville Express and the Foal Free Press, full of pictures of the event. We'll make a scrapbook party out of it! Oh, that will be fun! I have the quills and the inks, Rarity has the glitter, I'll write to Maud for a poem, Fluttershy could put in a few bluejay feathers, Pinkie could throw in streamers and deflated balloons... We'll make a book!
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Tea And Book Planning
May 21: Over tea at Rarity's boutique, we held a scrapbook planning and brainstorming session. Pinkie thinks it's a great idea and wanted to start it right away but we're still waiting for all the pictures to come in. Apart from the few that were printed in the papers, most are not printed and some are not even developed yet. It was an all night party and ponies are catching up on their sleep and on their duties.
Pinkie was wearing, and eating, her seven rock-candy necklaces. Five from us, one from Maud and one from Spike. The one Spike made was extra sparkly. Spike has a knack for selecting stones and he may have grown and tuned the rock candy a bit. We were discussing the paper for the scrapbook.
I want them to be good, thick, archival-quality, cotton fiber pages. Pinkie wants paper to be all colors and the book to have tassels, lots of tassels. For bookmarks. For every page. Rarity insists that the color scheme for the book should be pink, baby blue and yellow.
Dash thinks we should have all the pictures in our hooves the day after tomorrow. That gives Rarity enough time to put together an assortment of ribbons, glitter, sequins and her book-making kit. Pinkie will bring the paints and well as vanilla, chocolate, nutmeg, cinnamon and other spices, to scent the pages. And frosting too. I have doubts about the frosting idea.
Fluttershy is going to press and wax some flowers, leaves and grasses, and a blue jay feather. I'm bringing the quills and inks. Spike will do much of the writing. Applejack is going to make the book covers and spine out of apple tree wood, she just has to decide what to carve into the wood. Dash suggested decorating the covers with polished rock candy. Pinkie will have to promise not to eat it.
We'll do this in the Treecastle. There's more room and the rock floors will be easier to clean if we make a mess. I wrote to Maud Pie to ask for a poem. We can always add that in when it gets here.
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Picking Out Supplies
May 22: I sent Spike to Canterlot to pick up paper for Pinkie's Surprise Picnic Party Scrapbook. Twenty-five pages of each color, in two shades of pink (raspberry and rose), yellow (pale gold) and cerulean (not baby) blue. Rarity, the color expert.
Spike and I know a shop in Canterlot that has the very best in stationary and art supplies. While he's there, he'll pick up some archival quality colored inks and calligraphy quills. Spike often acts as my secretary and he really knows his quills.
Rarity has the necessary thread. Applejack is hard at work on the book covers. She's fitting together pieces of seasoned knot-free apple wood to make planks that are flat and sturdy. There was still some rock candy left from the party (Pinkie had made a whole wagon load!) and Rarity is polishing some of the nicer ones, in colors that will represent each of us.
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Working on the Book
May 23: Dash brought in a pile of pictures which I sorted into chronological order and set them all out on the dining room table, along with the pictures from Pinkie's camera. It seemed to be the logical thing to do. Pinkie and Rarity brought her supplies which I set in the center of the table next to the four piles of paper from Canterlot, arranged by color, the five quills, in ascending nib width, and seven ink wells and blotters. Spike had bought black, blue, gold, green, purple and silver inks. He also set out a copper ink that leaked a blue edge. Very cool.
Applejack arrived with her apple wood hinged book covers and spine, along with wood working and wood burning tools, wood stains and polish. Fluttershy had her carefully pressed flowers, grasses leaves and blue jay feathers, preserved in transparent wax sheets. They looked to be dancing and bobbing to music only they could hear, but that we could all remember.
Spike set out the snacks and drinks on a separate table and we were all set!
Every book needs a beginning, so, working together, we composed a preface recounting the tale of the Party Pony of Ponyville who is really hard to surprise. Spike took notes and Rarity prepared the paper so it could be properly bound into a book after we'd filled them.
After a few drafts, during which Rarity snipped a few locks from our manes and somehow tied them into fancy lace-like outlines of our cutie marks, we were ready to have it written into the book. But first we each dabbed ink on a hoof and left a hoof-print here and there on the first six pages in the book, carefully tracing the outline of the hoof as well. Near each pony's print, Rarity glued the knotted mane-lace cutie marks. Spike left a scale and a claw-print too, and he filled in the rest of the space with the tale. He really is good with a calligraphy quill.
On to the pictures! We played a bit with the order and the narrative they made and I spaced them out so that there were pictures on all the pages that remained in the book. Then it was just a question of filling it in with anecdotes, descriptions, Fluttershy's hoofwork, glitter, paint, sketches, ribbons, scents and the like. We left a space for a poem from Maud, when it arrives.
Applejack and Rarity were hard at work on the book covers. Applejack had worked three balloon shapes into the front and the back, burning in strings for the balloons and staining the wood in shades of pink, yellow and blue. She carved out sockets for Rarity's polished rock candy facets, arranged to represent flowers, and together they scored the wood and glued in gem grit in firework patterns. The title, Pinkie Pie Spring Picnic Surprise Party, they spelled out in gold foil on the front and the spine. Inside the front and back covers, a rough map of Ponyville in gems, wood stain, wood burning, paint and inks. Rarity thought to bring tissue guards which will be placed inside the covers once the paint, inks and stains are dry. The tissue guards keep the paint and stains from transferring to the book pages. The advantage of the wooden covers is that they keep the paper pages flat. Rarity made a pair of plaited silver wire clasps to hold the covers shut just for this purpose.
All the pages are resting on the table now, drying and waiting for assembly, Rarity will be doing that with our help on the day after tomorrow. Pinkie is all for the wait -- it's a party that, while it may not go on forever, it's not over yet. There is also Maud's poem. And Pinkie is going to get every pony in Ponyville to sign it. This party might just last for months.
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Rocking the Rock Candy
May 24: Rock candy necklaces are the new 'thing' in Ponyville. Since Pinkie is the sole source of rock candy in Ponyville (it's a secret recipe), she's been baking and filling the new rock candy bins at Sugarcube Corner. At least it's allowing the pages of her to-be-assembled scrapbook to dry unruffled.
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Between the Covers
May 25: We got together again this afternoon to assemble the pages and fit them between the covers. While we drank tea, Rarity sewed the pages together and connected them to the book spine. With all pictures, ribbons and pressed flowers, the book was a bit thicker than expected. Applejack added a bit more wood to the spine to make it larger before connecting the covers to it with hinges and adding Rarity's two plaited silver clasps.
We read through it again, of course. All that's left is to transcribe Maud's poem, when it arrives, and to get everypony in Ponyville to sign it. Cheese Sandwich too, next time he comes by. Pinkie will probably have to write to him.
One scrapbook for Pinkie, check. The Surprise Pinkie Party has been a success.
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Hot Spring Day
May 26: It was really hot and muggy for a spring day today. A taste of what awaits us in summer. We all went to the spa today, even Rainbow Dash, although she didn't stay long. She joined us for a relaxing soak in the hot tub, then flew off for a nap.
It turns out that Pinkie has a few scrapbooks already. I guess the scrapbook we collaborated on was a better gift than I imagined. Sometimes I get lucky.
Apart from the soak, I enjoyed a mud bath and a massage. Wallowing in mud makes me feel all tingly, like I'm a filly getting into mischief. But it also feels great on my skin and after the mud is washed off, my coat just shines.
After the spa, we hauled Rainbow Dash from her nap and went to Sugarcube Corner for big bowls of fruit and spice ices. I had a mint tea and lemon flavored ice. I wouldn't mind having another right now. I should make some mint iced tea for tomorrow.
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Maud Pie's Poem
May 27: I received a late delivery of a letter from Galloping Gorge. It's a reply from Maud Pie and it read:
my sister
sedimentary
bedrock
metamorphic
volcanic
sparkling
with crazy
facets
shine on
OK. I forgot that Maud composed short poems. This will take less room than I thought. Spike has penned out a few trial versions in the various inks. We'll ask Pinkie tomorrow which is best.
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Lithography in Silver Ink
May 28: Pinkie asked Spike to use the silver ink (it's on a blue page) and to copy Maud's hoofwriting as well as he could. He made an exact copy, just bigger.
Well, the book only lacks signatures. Pinkie has been knocking on doors and there are already several signatures. It's slow going because at each stop, every pony wants to tell their version of the party. It's great for Pinkie, she's reliving the whole thing at every house she visits.
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Between the Pages
May 29: After all that excitement planning, living and reliving Pinkie's surprise party, it was good to spend time with my books.
I need more books.
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Wild Herbs
May 30: I dropped in on Zecora today. She was at the surprise party, but there was so much activity and noise we were hardly able to exchange two words that day. I thanked her for the fireworks and for bringing the delicious punches and other drinks. They were so good that everypony kept her and Big McIntosh hopping, fetching more water and mixing fresh batches all afternoon and well into the night. She'd seen the scrapbook already, Pinkie had come by earlier to show it off and get it signed. I spotted a rock candy necklace dangling amidst the suspended vials and gourds in her apothecary of medicinal ingredients.
We had a nice chat over cups of a bitter mint iced tea. I think I detected wintergreen, peppermint and dandelion. It's amazing what she can do with wild herbs.
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No Guns in Equestria
May 31: I've noticed that "guns", which use an explosive chemical reaction to push a projectile, seem to be a weapon of choice in your Euclydean universe. In Equestria, that would not be practical. The explosion is too fast for most ponies to guide the projectile in a way that it can reach its target with any force or accuracy. Shooting arrows or launching spears and rocks gives a pony a lot more control, consistency and distance. If you depend only on a split-second detonation to push a projectile, the 'path' (choice of distances) it takes from point A happens at random, and it could end up at just about any distance in the direction it was heading. Due to gravity, its displacement through the air is not in a straight line, it follows a curve. That means at every instant, its "vector" (to use the Euclydean term) has a different slope and thus a whole new infinite selection of 'paths' (distances from A to B) that it will 'follow' at random. A pony would do much better to just throw a rock, thereby maintaining control of the 'path' of the rock the whole time it's in flight.
Party cannons, like those used by Cheese Sandwich and Pinkie Pie, employ a spring. A spring launcher is slower and lets the party pony control the path of objects fired. That way Pinkie can use a party cannon to set tables and launch balloons and confetti.
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Twilight's Blog | VI June | And That's How they Do It Down On The Farm
June 1: Applejack had us all over for supper and "some down home cooking". Pinkie took a break from knocking on doors and showed us all the signatures she'd collected so far. There were lots of scraps of paper stashed between the pages to keep down the smudging while the inked signatures dried. Most ponies signed on their pictures, near pictures of ponies they knew well or near pictures of events that night that they liked. Rarity fussed a bit over the scuff marks to the covers and put a fresh shine on a few of the rock candy flowers. Pinkie had also brought over the scrapbook she had made of her road trip with the Apples to Goldie Delicious' house. Fluttershy was especially fascinated by the odd creatures living in the "scariest cave in Equestria".
The food was delicious. After we ate we played horseshoes out back until well after moon rise. There were two horseshoe pits, which is just as well, or we'd still be waiting to play the winner after Applejack and Rainbow Dash got at it. They just don't know when to call it even.
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Carerfilly Trip Planned -- It's a Picnic
June 2: While soaking in the hot tub at the Ponyville Spa, I announced my intention to Rarity to head over to Carerfilly Castle to browse the books. Rarity thought that we should all go. It would be a great excuse for a picnic and to see how her mended tapestries were holding up. Dash volunteered to get the word out to Pinkie and Applejack. Fluttershy, surrounded by friends in the warm relaxing embrace of the hot tub and feeling brave, said she would come too. She's curious what late spring has brought to the Everfree. I could almost see manticore cubs dancing in her eyes.
So we're going tomorrow! Spike has packed a pot, bowls and the ingredients for alfalfa cube, apple slice sugar beet pulp soup. I've packed quills, ink and scrolls, and I've invited Zecora. I intend to get there early and to leave late.
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The Heart of Carerfilly Castle Beats Still
June 3: I got ready early and set out to the Carerfilly Castle with Spike. While on our way to pick up Zecora, the morning sun broke through the Everfree gloom and briefly shone on a large stone outcrop up ahead. A cockatrice jumped up on the rock and started sunning itself. We made a detour.
Zecora was all set to go, some picnic treats packed in one saddlebag and her all purpose herb kit packed in the other. We set out for the library! Adventure awaits! (Spike rolled his eyes when he thought I wasn't looking.)
We were soon over the moat and at the entrance to the ruins. The time had passed for lilacs and innocence, it was too early for forget-me-nots, but there were a few irises and dandelions in bloom by the tumbled stones. We walked in and strolled down the stately halls, down to the library and magic.
I lost track of time.
While I was nose-deep in books, Rarity, Fluttershy, Tree Hugger and Applejack arrived, around about late morning. Tree Hugger is Fluttershy's naturalist friend and she was passing through Ponyville today so Fluttershy invited her to come along to our picnic in the Carerfilly Castle ruins. We had met before as Fluttershy had also invited her to the latest Grand Galloping Gala. Along the way they had met the river serpent again, sunning and preening in the shallows. Tree Hugger says he's one with his center, all his chakras are in order and his aura just glows. I think that means she is impressed.
Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash arrived a bit later. Dash helped Applejack spread out the picnic while Rarity, Tree Hugger and Fluttershy toured the castle and discussed esthetics. Pinkie Pie made a bee-line for the "organ to the outside" and started pounding out preludes and fugues by Eweslamb Sebaastian Black on the keyboard. This I know because she hit a key sequence that nearly launched me out a window while I was reading a book on living tree trunk habitat and design. It took me five minutes to find my place again. Zecora and Spike snickering in the stacks did not help me regain my concentration.
Over lunch Tree Hugger spoke at length of the harmonics in the ruined structure and discussed harmonious reparations with Rarity. It looks simple to me. You put the stones back from where they fell, and if you're not sure, you copy the pattern across the hall. Esthetics escapes me.
After lunch I zipped back to the stacks. So many books to read! I think Zecora found good reading too. Evening came much too soon. Spike had headed back to Ponyville with the others and it was just me and Zecora turning pages in the deepening shadows. It was time to go home.
How I missed this library and all these old books! I want to take them all home.
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The Grass Also Rises
June 4: I went for a morning stroll in the Ponyville Commons and grazed a bit in the pasture while leafing through Effective Haying Equipment and Practices for Temperate Equestria and the Lower Mountainous Regions. The grass is growing well (it's also quite tasty!) and soon there will be another Hay Board meeting, some time before First Cut.
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The Stars, See How They Shine For You
June 5: It's so nice out tonight. Rainbow Dash had cleared out every last cloud out of the sky over Ponyville before sunset and all the constellations were up and active. The night is just full of stars. Princess Luna waited at least two hours before raising the moon, probably to show off her sea of stars to full effect. I saw at least two shooting stars go by, winking over Applejack's farm. Getting a new telescope is still on my to-do list. But laying down on my Treecastle balcony staring deep into the starry abyss, I could feel my whole universe spin. Wheels within wheels.
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Get Power Grass! Your Fillies Will Run Like Griffins!
June 6: I'm going to have to cut down on that fresh spring grass. There are ponies selling fresh picked bundles at the bazaar and I just can't seem to only eat one. As a result, my energy levels are coming in fits and bursts. I fell asleep halfway through re-reading Daring Do and the Eternal Flower. Will she meet the unageing pony one day? My hooves are growing long and uncomfortable. I'll get them filed down on my next trip to the spa.
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Back to the Books
June 7: I was feeling a bit fidgety so I decided to go browse the Carerfilly Castle Library some more. I made myself comfortable with a few likely books in Princess Celestia's old reading room, checked out of Equestria and into the thoughts and words of ponies gone a thousand years. Little has changed. The crops still grow, ponies change the seasons and magic is magic. We have a good system.
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As the Sun Rises So Does the Moon
June 8: Another Summer Sun Celebration is coming soon. This year Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are going to Fillydelphia to be feted. Princess Cadence is staying in the Crystal Empire, and I am staying here in Ponyville. My best friends are here, so that suits me fine. Getting anchored to this Tree-Chest-Castle, as Pinkie puts it, does have an up side.
Every town in Equestria is set to party all night until the sun is raised on Summer Sun Celebration day, regardless if they're in the crowd watching Princess Luna lower the moon and Princess Celestia raise the sun. Ponyville is no different. Pinkie will be off to the races with the planning and execution, but everypony will be lending a hoof. It's tradition. Fluttershy is orchestrating her birds for a special dawn chorus. There will be food and banners and glitter and clouds in the shape of the Royal Pony Sisters placed 'just so'...
There's tradition, but with Princess Luna back, should there be a stargazing event included? If so, should the name be changed to... Summer Sun and Moon Celebration? Or better yet: Summer Sky Celebration? Or maybe have two events six months apart. A Summer Sun Celebration and a Winter Moon Festival? Winter Moon, right after the Running of the Leaves, kicking off three months of ease and holidays. That could work.
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Refreshed
June 9: Spa Day just couldn't come soon enough! My hooves were really feeling long and off and all that time in Princess Celestia's old reading room in Carerfilly Castle got me feeling all grubby. That place hasn't been dusted in centuries. I arrived at the spa early, even before Fluttershy. Luckily, I'm always equipped with a book to read.
It wasn't long before Pinkie joined me in the waiting room. She has just about finished touring Ponyville with her scrapbook. When she's finished, we'll probably freshen up the scents we put in it.
Applejack walked in looking a little worse for wear. She's been clearing out some of the dead apple trees and teaming up with Big McIntosh to pull out the stumps. She went for the sauna, massage and aromatic oils regime.
Fluttershy and Rarity arrived at about the same time. Fluttershy's house full of critters is driving her a bit ragged (especially the baby birds fillies and colts keep bringing her) and Rarity is midway through completing another order for Sapphire Shores. Both also looked past due for the Ponyville Spa. Aloe took our orders.
An hour and a half later we were mellow, shiny new mares. Rainbow Dash too, although she arrived late and just soaked with us in the hot tub. Finally my hooves feel right again and I don't feel like I've spent an afternoon cleaning an attic. We celebrated with ice cream, just because. Philosopher Pinkie Pie stated on no uncertain terms that ice cream with friends is reason enough to celebrate. I couldn't agree more. I had orange chocolate jalapeno ice cream. For the adventure!
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Call of the Smoothie
June 10: I can hear the spring grass calling me. Soft, tasty spring grass. Leave me be, grass! See here, I'm eating second cut hay from last summer. Ha! I am safe in this Tree built rock horse-house, high above your siren song, here in my fortress, my island of serenity. I am an island in the sea of green. You can not touch me. I'm not listening.
I wonder if Fluttershy saw anything interesting in the Everfree the other day? Not that she could take a manticore cub home. It would probably eat her nestlings.
I think there's a pony at the bazaar who specializes in grass smoothies... a spring grass smoothie must be really, really good.
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Brain Freeze
June 11: I caved in. I got a spring grass smoothie. It was good. It was cold. I have a headache. I think I drank it too fast.
Hay Board meeting tomorrow. I'll feel better by then. Yay.
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Making With The Hay
June 12: Hay Board Meetings are fun! Our hay stores are still well stocked. We'll make it to the second cut. The rougher first cut hay is better for less active ponies. The more physically active ponies, such as the pegasi and ponies plowing the fields, need the boost provided by the faster burning second cut hay. But because the second and third cut hays are softer and sweeter smelling, most ponies like them a lot too. Our local harvesters also produce special mixes with more or less alfalfa, clover and with other grasses like oats and wheat, as well as fermented bales. A lot of that is for export and trade with other species.
There is still a fair amount of demand for our specialty hays but prices have dropped now that the pastures are lush once again. We have just about depleted our inventory of fermented hay. Export demand is highest for our silage so we recommended that our harvesters make more polymer-sealed hay bales. Those are the easiest to transport and because they're relatively small, they sell better because less is wasted to spoilage after the polymer seal is broken.
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Spur of the Moment
June 13: After the all the fun of planning out the short, medium and long term production recommendations and common pricing strategy with the Hay Board, I was keen to gossip with Applejack and Rarity. We got together at Sugarcube Corner today, all six of us, and over tea and oatmeal cookies, we hatched a plan to take a day trip to the Crystal Kingdom and visit their library!
Or maybe it wasn't so much a plan, more of a suggestion. That I made. To return a few books. And look at more books. Did I mention it wasn't a popular plan? Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy didn't look too excited.
Well I'm going, and surprisingly, Applejack and Rarity are coming too. Rarity is looking for fresh pattern ideas and she wants to research old Crystal Empire fashions. Applejack wants to see if she can grow crystal corn in Ponyville and to see first hoof what apples and apple accessories sell in the Crystal Empire.
I wrote a quick note to Princess Cadence and Shining Armor to say we're coming and sent it by express mail, special delivery.
Tomorrow, we take the train! Bright and early.
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On Our Way
June 14: Ugh. Who named me 'Twilight' Sparkle? Wouldn't 'Evening' Sparkle have been enough? (Went to bed late last night... or earlier this morning.) Must get going. To the train station. For the books.
I'm worried it might have been a bit too short notice and we might have trouble finding a room. Too late now! We could always take the overnight train back to Ponyville. I hope Rarity packed light.
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Back From the Crystal Empire
June 15: We're back from Crystal Empire and I have a fresh load of books from Cadence and a few borrowed from the library. That library, so big, so full of books! Floors and floors of bookcases full of books! The librarian found several illustrated manuscripts for Rarity detailing exotic Crystal Pony fashion as well as scrolls with dressmaking patterns. Rarity looked like she was rolling in clover. Meanwhile Applejack canvassed the Crystal Empire shops, picking up crystal berries and corn, and finding new clients for her apples and apple-based confections. She even joined us at the library to look up recipes and to jot some down.
Cadence and Shining found rooms for us in the castle. We didn't have to sleep in the street or sleep three in the same bed. I did get chided for not giving them more advance notice. Ha ha, ah well, sometimes I'm not as organized as I could be.
Cadence and Shining Armor invited us to dinner. I almost missed it, the librarian let me stay late and I lost track of the time. Applejack came back to get me. Rarity wore an 'evening hat' to dinner that trailed colored streamers down to her withers. She said it was all the rage over a thousand years ago in the Crystal Empire. That's a bit vague since _all_ the Crystal Empire fashions date back to over a thousand years ago. She did attract some odd looks from the older crystal ponies serving us.
This Summer Sun Celebration in the Crystal Empire promises to be extra festive. Princess Cadence has been studying Crystal Empire traditions and now that the ponies have most of their memories back, she has been pumping them for ideas. It's going to be a big bash, sure to light up the night sky all over Equestria. A gala, dancing, midnight candle-lit parades, extravagant costumes. Rarity's eyes were as wide as saucers. She looked very tempted to skip Ponyville's Celebration and go back to the Crystal Empire to see this. Maybe next year.
Cadence has been picking up books here and there for me. She's put the word out that she has a taker for any old books that ponies might not want any more and she has been given several dozen. It's an eclectic mix. Children's story books, reference books, journals, cook books (Applejack has already borrowed those from me), travel guides... Almost all of them are over a thousand years old, like the Crystal Ponies that had owned them. It's fascinating!
Time to hit the hay! It's been an exciting, but tiring, couple of days.
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Paper Lanterns and Fireflies
June 16: On the ride back to Ponyville on the train, Rarity was hatching a plan to have a Ponyville version of the Crystal Empire parade in the wee hours before the Summer Sun Celebration sunrise. It involves streamers, paper lanterns and fireflies. She'll have to run it by the mayor and Pinkie for approval.
In the late evening the weather ponies sent us a real drencher! The clouds just poured down pounding torrents of water. It was quite exciting! Spike called me to the balcony to watch. It was totally worth putting down a book for a few minutes to go look. The heavy, sudden rainfall was there to flush out the streams and drainage ditches. It beats cleaning them by hoof. Then the pegasi mostly cleared the sky and dropped in a few rainbows. Everything looks sparkling clean in the bright sunshine now, all set to get decorated for Summer Sun.
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Proposing the Procession of Sparkles
June 17: Rarity had little difficulty convincing Mayor Mare and Pinkie to include her idea of a parade of lights. Usually ponies just step out of their houses or where they're having their all-night parties and watch the sun rise from the streets. With the parade, we can all end up together in a good spot, like a hill top, and watch the sun rise from there.
That was Rarity's opening argument, parading through town, picking up more ponies on the way, and ending up somewhere with a view. Probably the west pasture. There are some nice big rolling hills there. She brought some samples to show what she had in mind: wide gossamer cloth streamers glistening like dewy leaves, magicked to float like the air; colorful paper lanterns, some transparent, suspended on sticks and lit by candles. What she didn't have on hoof, but she hopes Fluttershy can pull off, is to have hundreds of fireflies to fly above the procession and follow it. Fluttershy is already having rehearsals with her special dawn chorus flock of birds. A hilltop destination would work out well with that too.
I saw Rarity's sample streamer. It's really beautiful. She and Spike spent all afternoon today digging up gems and tomorrow, while she's breaking and polishing the stones, I'm going to Canterlot with Spike to pick up enough gossamer cloth for her project.
Fluttershy was out after dark, rounding up and talking to fireflies. Spike was exhausted and went to sleep early.
Canterlot tomorrow! I wonder if I'll have time to take a peek at telescopes!
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We Came, We Bought, We Bolted
June 18: We caught the early train to Canterlot and arrived in time for an early lunch. We hoofed it to a cafe, ate and set off to the garment district where we found a few shops dealing in bolts of cloth. We got a rainbow assortment and we had so many that we hired a cab to lug it all back to the train station. It's a lot harder to find a cab in Canterlot than it is in Manehattan. Ponies are just more used to trotting and strolling leisurely in Canterlot.
I left Spike to guard our cloth horde while I went back to a shop selling scientific glassware and optical equipment. They had telescopes. Many telescopes. Mirrored telescopes. Glass lens telescopes. Combinations of reflective and refractive telescopes. Tracking telescopes. Telescopes with oculars that can be swapped for a photographic plate or a projector. They also had a book on telescopes. I bought that.
Back at the train station, I took over guard duty while Spike ran off to buy a snack. We caught the afternoon train back to Ponyville, arriving just before moon rise. It isn't too far to the Carousel Boutique from the train station. I managed to levitate all the cloth, and carry a sleeping Spike, and take it to Rarity.
I have lots of room on my Treecastle balcony. Maybe I'll get a nice fat mirrored telescope. But a small refractive telescope is fast and versatile! Hmph.
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Many Hooves At Work
June 19: Preparations for Summer Sun Celebration are picking up steam. Lots of decorations are going up following that drenching rain we got and the parade has been announced in the Ponyville Express. Pinkie has several ponies making the paper lanterns and the poles to carry them with. The candles were easy enough to find.
Pinkie and the Mayor have planned out the parade route and Pinkie is going to stash lanterns and Rarity's streamers all along the way. That way, as the parade grows, she can keep supplying ponies with more lanterns and streamers.
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There's a Party Going On
June 20: It's the night before the Summer Sun sunrise and the celebration has started! I have to gallop off to the Town Hall to where most of the ponies are partying. Pinkie wanted me to be the greeter at the door, seeing as I'm the local princess. Applejack thought that made sense, I could see the gears beginning to turn in Rarity's head and Fluttershy looked conflicted. I threw cold water on that idea. That's Mayor Mare's strength and this party is as much her doing as it is Pinkie's. Not only do I not want to steal her thunder, but if I shake everypony's hooves, all six of us will have to do the same. We're a team. And this is not our party, it's to celebrate the Royal Pony Sisters.
Luckily for me, nopony else was keen to spend the night shaking hooves. At least not that kind of shaking.
It's going to shaking, pronking and rolling at City Hall! DJ Pon3 is spinning her records, Rarity and Pinkie incorporated the paper lanterns and the bejeweled streamers into the festive decor, and Fluttershy's myriad of lightning bugs are blinking like mad on the outer walls of the building.
I'm going to catch up with my friends there. Maybe I can organize the overnight treat tables! Or maybe if a bring a lexicon and my Piaffle game I could interest some ponies in a game? Um, probably not. I'm sure Pinkie's got the party games covered. I'd better just go.
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Happy Summer Sun Celebration!
June 21: The party was fun. I spent the whole time there with my friends. I danced for a while, and tripped over my wings a few times. Those wings still have a mind of their own. At least they don't throw my covers halfway across the room that often anymore. I think I tripped a fair number of ponies too.
Pinkie Pie was often zipping off to organize a game, like pin the tail on the pony, or to tell a joke, or to juggle cream pies, or to drop a thousand balloons into the room. Applejack had her hooves full keeping the refreshments coming, and no she didn't want any help. Fluttershy stepped out a few times to make sure the fireflies didn't wander off. Her dawn chorus birds were sleeping in the bushes around a hill in the west pasture. Rarity was wearing a summer dress sequined in a starburst pattern and she had on a large plumed hat. Spike was playing all the games and Dash was playing pranks on Pinkie and Mayor Mare. That joy buzzer earned her a bucket of ice water over the head, courtesy of the Mayor.
Before the morning twilight, while the stars were still shining brightly in the night sky, Mayor Mare cut the music to announce the parade! That was Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash's cues. Rainbow dashed off with a few other pegasi to collect and shape the clouds they'd parked by the west pasture and Fluttershy went out to rally her flashing fleet of lightning bugs. Rarity, Spike and Pinkie set to moving the lanterns and streamers to the door, ready to be distributed by me and Applejack.
Mayor Mare explained that we were all to follow her lead. She was going to trot all around town, and we were to try and match her gait pattern, the clip-clopping of our hooves in the streets ringing as one! Now that's a fun game. She pointed out that Applejack and I were handing out lanterns and streamers to ponies to carry, and as a bonus, there were little silver bells and chimes on the lanterns and streamers, to compliment the fancy hoofstepping. She told us remember to look up, and as a final surprise, we were heading to a choice location to watch the sun rise. There was much hoof stomping. Everypony was champing at the bit to get going.
Rarity, Spike and Pinkie Pie slipped out ahead (Pinkie knew the route to be taken), Mayor Mare got to the door, and out, and the trot about town began. I calculated that with what we had, every fifth pony should get a lantern or a streamer. That went pretty smoothly. There were a few ponies that didn't want to carry anything and a few that really, really wanted to be a lantern or streamer bearer. I had to relight a few candles that had gone out. Finally, everypony was off and trotting and we followed.
The Mayor was having a grand time putting us to the test. Not just trotting, but stomping and tap dancing, fast and slow. As we went along, ponies that had stayed home or were at other parties joined the procession and joined in the drumming of the hooves. Pinkie was pulling out more lanterns and streamers from where she'd hid them and Applejack and I helped distribute them among the new ponies and I helped Spike light the candles. Meanwhile, a river of fireflies followed us overhead. It was amazing.
As the twilight grew near, Mayor Mare left the edge of town and trotted zigzags and loops through the western pasture and then spiraled up the biggest hill in the field. The lightning bugs were matching us every step of the way, the sky was growing lighter, and suddenly I felt waves of hope and love in the air. Everypony stopped and stared. From the north, giant streams of colored light were spreading south. The Crystal Empire. The crystal ponies, like us, were celebrating.
"Look east, everypony!" called out the mayor. There, bookending Ponyville in the distance were the Royal Pony Sisters carved in clouds. Rainbow Dash landed next to me, pleased as punch. The cloud sculptures began to turn pink, then salmon. To the west, the moon set. Then, straight over Ponyville, the sun rose. In the hush, Fluttershy's special dawn chorus sang from all around. Everypony cheered.
We were a lot of excited ponies, full of hope and love, in a wide, rolling field, with dozens of very sparkly streamers clenched in our teeth. There was pronking and galloping and prancing, the ponies with the streamers became impromptu leaders of small processions, running patterns. It was dazzling, like a thousand stars in the early dawn light. After a while the leaders took off toward town and headed back to the Town Hall where Applejack's crew was spreading a delicious Summer Sun Celebration breakfast for everypony.
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After the Party
June 22: Summer is here and the Celebration is done for another year. All that's left is the clean-up. The western field got a bit dug up with all the galloping yesterday morning. Our agriculture specialists have been busy all day smoothing out the ground, raking in peat and compost and reseeding. Right before sunset the weather crew gave the hill a light drenching. Fresh new grass will give the hill stripes in bright shades of green in no time.
The streamers that Rarity made have been collected and carefully stowed away for next year. The lanterns were given away to anypony who wanted one. Now every house has one, including mine. I have a lavender one hanging above my front door, and after sunset, I lit the candle.
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Dear Princess Celestia
June 23: It has been a long time since I've written a Friendship research letter to Princess Celestia. Research in that respect has been replaced by sporadic practical applications. What Friendship lesson can I draw from the success of our Ponyville Summer Sun Celebration? That when many friends work together in harmony, the fruit of their labor can be better than they ever imagined.
So I asked Spike to pick up a scroll and ink, just like old times.
Dear Princess Celestia and Princess Luna,
This year's Summer Sun Celebration party in Ponyville was like no other that I've seen. While your royal presences were absent, your spirits were in the hearts of everypony in Ponyville. The pre-sunrise party lasted all night and was crowned with a procession of glitter and lights designed by Rarity and inspired by the Crystal Empire festivities. Fluttershy orchestrated thousands of fireflies for the procession and dozens of birds for the dawn chorus. We had the night sky, the lights from the Crystal Empire, the lowering of the moon and raising of the sun, all while everypony in Ponyville was gathered in an open field. It was magic.
Many hooves worked and stamped as one to make this the best Summer Sun Celebration in Ponyville ever. The lesson that I learned right there and then was that when many friends work together in harmony, the fruit of their labor can be better than they ever imagined.
Your faithful student, now and always,
Twilight Sparkle
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First Cut Harvest Party
June 24: The timothy hay first cut harvest has begun! The cut grass is drying in the sun in several fields now and more is going to be harvested soon. By mid afternoon the mouth-watering scent of curing hay was wafting through my open windows. I was finding it hard to focus on my reading. I went down to the kitchen stores to see what I could pull out. I was rummaging through the pickled beets, crispy dried celery sticks and chopped corn stalk silage when I received a knock at the door. It was Pinkie dressed as a hay bale. She gave me an envelope, which promptly exploded in a cloud of confetti, leaving me with an invitation to a 'surprise hay harvest make way for the new harvest feast and party party' with only one hour to prepare myself and arrive at Sugarcube Corner. A feast was sounding really good by then.
It was just after closing so we had the first floor to us and the Cakes. Pinkie had gone all out with the harvest theme. There were long straw bale tables piled high with food, smaller straw bale tables with straw mound seats, harvesting equipment on the walls and paper lanterns hung up with baling twine. (I didn't know she had any left. She's getting extra mileage out of those lanterns. I guess she stashed a bunch more for "lantern emergencies".) Even with all the cooking and decorating she had found time to pick a few tasty bouquets of daisies, bladder campions, dandelion leaves, evening primrose and rough bedstraw.
The general idea was to eat the old hay to make room for the new hay. There was no way we were going to do that in one meal or even one day, but that was part of the joke. Still, Pinkie and the Cakes had pulled out all the stops in preparing and serving first cut hay in every way imaginable. It was all delicious. Now I'm stuffed. I think I ate too many hay fries, and crispy hay, and hay soup, and sweet and sour hay silage. And hay casserole. And hay juice smoothies. And hay cake. And ooooh, I'm going to go lay down for a while.
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Under Cover of the Night
June 25: Pinkie's hay feast was a good idea. After stuffing myself silly last night, I haven't been hungry all day. I did make a fresh batch of mint iced tea and I nibbled a few carrot sticks, but for the most part, I didn't eat. The smell of the fresh cut hay from the surrounding fields isn't as alluring as it was yesterday.
I bet there are foals out there now, in the fields under the cover of darkness, rolling in the sweet smell and eating great mouthfuls. I know I'd be tempted. The farmers are going to be vexed. There was an article about that last year in the Ponyville Express.
The hay farmers had a long list of complaints, like bunnies running off with their mouths stuffed with cut timothy grass and alfalfa, hiding it and coming back for more. Older foals sneaking into the fields after dark and not only eating the hay but making "hay princesses" everywhere, building hay forts, hay tunnels and carving trails through the hay as they galloped about chasing each other. The hay doesn't dry properly when it gets bunched up by this activity, and the gaps make baling more difficult too. At least there haven't been any stampedes. Yet.
I think someponies were exaggerating a bit. In Pinkie's opinion they're just grumpy gusses from working long hours without a break. According to Rainbow Dash it's just the prima donna farmers fussing. Rarity sympathized with them -- laying the grass out in patterns to dry right is _an art_. Running about on that tableau is _vandalism_. (Her emphasis.) Applejack didn't comment, she was on the farm, hard at work weeding and hoeing. And probably chasing varmints.
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When Winter Came to Equestria
June 26: One of the books Princess Cadence passed along to me is pretty interesting. It's a foal's storybook about how winter came to Equestria. It's a great insight into Crystal Pony culture. It goes something like this:
When Winter came to Equestria
Long, long ago when ponies first came to Equestria, the land was forever green and the grass grew long and lush. But the giant Windigo that lived in the mountains of the north came down to live in the plains and forests, and his name was Winter. Where he went, his hoofprints left sheets of ice. Where he swished his tail, frost covered the grass and the trees. Great clouds billowed from his breath, covering the sky and burying the land in snow. Soon all of Equestria became frozen and white. Nothing grew anywhere and the ponies became weak with hunger and despair.
Epona, the All Mother, decided to send the Windigo away. She traveled long through the wilderness, following the frost to where the snow was the deepest, to where Winter had settled. She found him one night, resting by a frozen waterfall as tall as a castle, on a carpet of pure white snow that glittered like a field of diamonds, under a breathless sky where every star stood still and shone with all their might.
The giant Windigo bid Epona welcome, but before Epona could speak, Winter began to mesmerize her with tales of the land before ponies, when all was cold and rock and sparkling crystals. Epona became drowsy and fell into a deep sleep. She had a dream. In her dream, the giant Winter filled the sky, his eyes like ice and his mane weaving across the sky like smoke. Then suddenly, in her dream he began to shrink and melt. Great rivers flowed all around and meadows of sweet grass sprang up. Epona slept for three whole months.
When she woke, the Windigo was gone and her friend the crystal hare was nestled in her mane. "Far to the south there lives a Princess," said the hare "her power is greater than the Windigo. Find her and bring her here."
More tomorrow.
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When Winter Came to Equestria (concluded)
June 27: Epona wallowed through the deep snow and made her way south. The days passed, the snow and ice grew thinner, then patchy, and here and there green things grew. She crossed rivers and plains. She trotted through wild mossy forests, skirted a vast swamp and walked through a jungle into a wide clearing. It was as hot and humid as a sauna. Birds chased insects over gigantic leaves, grass grew belly deep and the scent of flowers filled the air.
In the distance Epona could hear the sound of hooves and singing. She approached cautiously. On a low hill rested a grey mare and around her galloped and pranced four foals. The grey mare was unlike any Epona had seen before. She had wings. And she had a horn. When Epona had recovered from her surprise she noticed that she was no longer alone. An old pony had joined her. The old pony spoke. "The foals are celebrating Life, Growth, Renewal and Light. They do so to honor their Princess. Her name is Summer." At last Epona had found her Princess.
Epona emerged from the tall grass, stood at the bottom of the hill and called. Summer rose, and with hoofsteps as light as a feather, walked down to meet her. The All Mother is leader of all ponies everywhere.
Together they raced back north. In every hoofprint Summer made, grass sprang up and spread in all directions. Above her the skies cleared and the frost retreated. Over the hills and to the north they ran, leaving a trail of green life behind them. Finally they reached Epona's country where everypony slept and the land was silent and white.
Winter was waiting for Epona to return and he was delighted to see she had brought a tall grey mare with her. But before Winter could speak, Princess Summer took to the air. With great wing-beats she cleared the air of mist and clouds. She folded her wings, dived to the ground and landed so hard that she shook the snow off the trees, shattered the ice on the lakes and rivers and woke everypony in the north. She then opened her wings and with her horn shining like a second sun, sang a note so pure that every plant burst into leaf and flower; and the heat that they made melted all the snow and ice, carrying away Winter in a torrent of water.
But Epona is the All Mother and she caught the giant Windigo by the tail and she dragged him to the shore. She made Winter promise to return to his mountains. But she also granted Winter permission to come back every year for three months to balance out Summer's growth and bounty and to give ponies and their land a rest.
In this way, Epona gave us a new Harmony. Summer and Winter give us a time for work and a time for play. And like night and day, a balance between the time to run and the time for little ponies to sleep.
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Epona the All Mother
June 28: That foal's storybook is probably a glimpse into pony culture thousands of years ago, before there was an Equestria and maybe before alicorn ponies. The story elements of relevance that I'd place emphasis on are: winter, snow, Epona, strange alicorn, crystal hare, land before ponies, north, a time without seasons, weather as an instrument of harmony and a benign/tamed windigo. Also: the story predates Crystal Empire princesses and was probably adapted to include Equestria to make it relevant when this book was printed about a thousand years ago. Epona is a very old legend. I wonder who she retrieved from the south to combat the windigo in earlier versions and what did the crystal ponies call Equestria back then?
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Ancient Chic
June 29: We all met up for some ice cream at Sugarcube Corner this afternoon. Rarity was keen to share her latest designs inspired by ancient Crystal Empire chic. She's been studying a book she'd borrowed from the Crystal Empire Library and she'd come up with a few ideas. I went with Fluttershy to the Carousel boutique to look, but Pinkie Pie, Applejack and Rainbow Dash had other plans.
From the line of dresses and ensembles Rarity showed us, I see she picked up mostly on the ancient styles of pleated skirts, the variations on zigzag and squared sinusoidal curves, the light gauzy wraps and the rope-like gold leg bands, necklaces and head ornamentation. Rarity's creations look both elegant and summery. They also look very reserved for Rarity. The glitter was turned way down, she had just a hint of sparkle along the hem line, nothing more. Very nice.
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Getting Bathed, Oil School!
June 30: It was another hot and humid day today and I was ready for trip to the spa. So was everypony else. Fortunately I'd dropped by the spa yesterday to reserve us six spots.
The spa ponies had something new. Rarity had come across a description of a fragrant oil bath in a book she consulted at the Crystal Empire Library. It involves getting covered in oil and then getting nearly all that oil combed out of your fur, mane and tail with a curved, scoop-like comb. I had to try that! For science! Fluttershy, Applejack and of course Rarity were game too, but Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie had other plans.
While we got hooficures, massages, seaweed wraps and finally a cool rinse and dry in anticipation of getting slathered in oil, those silly mares went from the hot tub to go roast in the sauna! When finally they were so hot you'd think they were about to burst into flames, the two of them dashed outside to where Dash had parked a big black cloud. Dash kicked the cloud into action and they cooled off in the torrential downpour. Then, looking like drowned rats, the two of them ran back inside and giggling like fillies, shook their coats, spraying us until we too were soaked.
We dried off again, and we were ready for the oil. Lotus and Aloe must be consulting quite a bit with Zecora because that oil really smelled heavenly, relaxing and invigorating, all at once. Rarity said that the reference she had was pretty vague on what the oil was made of or what it smelled like, so the spa ponies just, improvised.
We stood on large raised stone tables and got light, warm oil poured all over our bodies. It felt weird. There were grooves on the table to both collect the oil that dripped off our coats and to ensure we wouldn't slip and fall. There was also a wooden bar in front that we could grab with our teeth, in case we started to slip anyway. When the oil had soaked through, the spa ponies pulled out their custom-made "strigil combs" and combed and scraped every flank, hock, crevice, nook, hair and feather on our bodies. Those ponies work fast but it still was a lot of work. But Celestia! It was worth it!
When the four of us stepped out of the spa, so mellow and so silky, I swear all conversation just stopped everywhere. We just glowed and glistened in the sunshine and everypony stared. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie joined us and as we strolled to Sugarcube Corner for ices, I think we nearly started a parade of agog ponies.
It still feels fantastic, but there is a downside. I have to watch where I settle down so I don't leave a pony-shaped oil patch on a favorite rug or anything else that's hard to clean. Like my books.
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