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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p12_BV18t411Q7Q1_p12_m4-dialogue_0617129 | [S1] Um, my father urged me to pursue my passion. That's why I'm here. I had to go into showbiz to make all the money I lost designing and marketing neckerchiefs. [S2] It's always a good idea to stutter on the final word. [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] You know, Drew, call me old fashioned, but I long for the days when wives staye... | 27.24 | 3.095015 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p12_BV18t411Q7Q1_p12_m4-dialogue_0617129.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966746 | [S1] Hear ye, hear, hear ye, hear ye, hear ye, all, all rise. All rise. [S2] That'll be it. [S1] The honorable Norman- [S2] What are you doing? [S1] I'm Judge Judy's, I guess. I had a, I had an idea. [S2] Oh, you had an idea, huh? [S1] Yeah. [S2] What's this? [S1] It's my nightstick. [S2] What's this? [S1] Oh, that's, ... | 27.64 | 3.126099 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966746.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966748 | [S1] ... teenage guys. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Must've been from Alabama, someplace in the deep South. [S2] Yeah. [S1] You know, not brilliant. [S2] Yeah. [S1] [LAUGHS] | 8.72 | 2.915885 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966748.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966750 | [S1] And were we not in a position to have this younger group that's sort of, maybe I'm like the Tony Bennett of the, of court shows. [S2] Oh, that's a good one. [S1] You know, we have a new, we have a new group who are finding interesting the quirkiness of what we do. [S2] Yeah. And you're there. I have my trusty side... | 26.6 | 3.11185 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966750.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966752 | [S1] ... yet, but I think he got gypped. [S2] Yeah. Well, I don't, we, we, I don't think gypped is a word we can use anymore, but I do think that, uh, I did get, uh, bamboozled. [S1] Oh, gypped. [S2] Because gypped. [S1] I don't think I've seen gypsy in some people. [S2] Uh, but, uh, I, uh, I went to- [S1] It's OPC. Th... | 26.96 | 3.063802 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966752.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966753 | [S1] Tell them the trip. [S2] Uh, I was, I was attempting to, to rent a, an apartment. [S1] Wanted to rent a place. [S2] A gentleman, and he, uh, he showed me the, uh, the apartment and the, and the facilities and walked me around, gave me a tour, and then I came back, uh, and, and gave him a deposit. And then the day ... | 27.24 | 3.32682 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966753.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966754 | [S1] What about Double Jeopardy? [S2] What about Double Jeopardy? [S1] Well, I was just watching this, uh, this OJ, uh, interview and it appeared to me that he, he committed to... [S2] Well, I, we, did we watch the same interview? [S1] But forget about that. Even if he had confessed openly, he could not be tried for th... | 25.92 | 3.305822 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966754.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966755 | [S1] Do you feel, how about that case? Do you feel, 'cause obviously it appears to an objective outsider that, uh- [S2] Payback. [S1] That was payback. Yeah. [S2] Obviously. [S1] Yeah. [S2] Well, that was what you call justice. [S1] So you, you, you, you're all right with that? [S2] There was a certain poetic justice. | 17.84 | 3.235712 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966755.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966756 | [S1] In that powerful sentence for what was a ridiculous crime. [S2] A tiny crime. [S1] Yeah. Well, well, it wasn't a tiny. I mean, if you go in with a gun and hold somebody up and take their property, that's a big crime. [S2] Right. [S1] But if what you're doing is you're an idiot and you're going in and taking back y... | 25.16 | 3.30014 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966756.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966757 | [S1] It's like when, uh, when, uh, Paul Newman won for color of money. [S2] Ah. [S1] Yeah. [S2] He was- [S1] But what about double jeopardy? Were you considered double jeopardy? [S2] He was, he was the handsomest man in the world. [S1] Who's this? [S2] Paul Newman. [S1] Oh, wasn't he, though? | 13.28 | 2.800037 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966757.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966758 | [S1] Just throwing that in as an aside, I have, I keep a picture of Paul Newman in my living room. [S2] Oh. [S1] That was, that was signed to me. [S2] Uh-huh. [S1] And he wrote, "To da judge." [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] "If only you were the judge of my DUI." [S2] [LAUGHS] | 18.04 | 2.882387 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966758.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966759 | [S1] Uh, uh. [S2] Oh. [S1] I went on a celebrity millionaire and I didn't have any charity to give it to, so I decided to give it to, to, uh, Paul Newman's Hole in the Wall Gang because, uh, uh, Paul Newman's my favorite actor and I thought maybe I'll get to meet him. And then, um, I got, uh, uh, I got a half a million... | 28.8 | 3.097203 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966759.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966760 | [S1] You missed, you missed an opportunity. If you invited me, I would- [S2] You would have gone. You'd be there, right? Yeah. It's happened to me a couple of times. This is what I always worry about. Like Johnny Carson asked me this, and I said, "What if I show up, Johnny Carson tells me a story, then what do I say? W... | 29.56 | 3.043244 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966760.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966762 | [S1] And he told you this at the, at the- [S2] No, he would never tell me that. He would never tell me that. He was cool, however, when we met, but I had, I read subsequently he was interviewed. [S1] Ah. He blazed the trail and you built Fort Apache. [S2] Well, I, I, well, actually that was Stu Billett. [S1] [LAUGHS] [... | 29 | 3.094839 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966762.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966763 | [S1] who looked good, you know, was visually appealing, got a nice head of white hair. [S2] Sure. Rusty? [S1] Intelligent, intelligent enough. [S2] You know, I read Rusty was on the Manson trial. Did you know that? [S1] I didn't know that. But would you trust Rusty even, not now, but then, would you trust Rusty to defe... | 21.84 | 2.837418 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966763.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966764 | [S1] Just stunning. [S2] We actually saw the other day because we saw, uh, uh, the 60 Minutes, uh, interview with, uh, Marley Safer. Marley Safer does these, uh, interviews with American eccentrics. Not that you're eccentric. [S1] A little. [S2] But, uh, and he was, uh, profiling you, and I assume that's where it all s... | 21.84 | 2.996559 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966764.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966765 | [S1] see what it really is like. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And I really felt that the family court was a place that should be open to the press. [S2] Yes. [S1] Because at that time in New York, and probably in a lot of other places, it was sort of the dumping ground for morons- [S2] Uh-huh. [S1] ... and political hacks. People w... | 26.6 | 3.253571 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966765.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966766 | [S1] And where are we going to put them? We can't put them in the civil court or the Supreme Court because press goes in there to report. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] So we have to put them in a place where nobody can see the morons that we're pointing to the court. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Now, I know that because I worked in the fami... | 28.88 | 3.237549 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966766.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966767 | [S1] I did incur the wrath of several who tried to keep me off the bench. [S2] You were a prosecuting attorney. [S1] I was a prosecutor. I was a prosecutor. Yeah, I didn't believe in excuses. | 12.32 | 3.173986 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966767.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966768 | [S1] You know, I'm not sure. I honestly think that, and I know that I'm going to get a lot of flack. Don't write me letters, don't say anything negative. I don't read them. I have teams of people who go through the mail and take out anything that's not complimentary. [S2] I know, I've been writing you for years. [S1] A... | 22.68 | 3.048169 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966768.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966769 | [S1] But I actually believe that in order to be a family court judge, where you touch so many different issues involving family, you should have a family. [S2] Oh, that's very interesting. [S1] And because if you don't have a family, I mean, you have a son. [S2] Yes. Uh, wait, how'd you know that? [S1] I do my due dili... | 26.2 | 3.232841 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966769.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966770 | [S1] You know what, you know what teenagers are like. You know when they lie. You know when they try to get over. You know, you know the excuses that they make. You, you're divorced. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Right? So you know what that is like. Uh, I've been divorced. [S2] You don't know I'm a secret homosexual, do you? [S1] N... | 27.44 | 3.000902 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966770.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966771 | [S1] I, I loved your book, first of all. Um- [S2] It was a great book. [S1] It was a- [S2] This is- How many books have you read? [S1] It's very old. I wrote it a long- I wrote it a long time ago. Do not ask me any questions about- [S2] How many books have you read? [S1] I don't know, five or six. [S2] This one's calle... | 29.84 | 2.928637 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966771.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966772 | [S1] You know, this, this is, this is something that always bothered me. And I first heard it on the, the Wapner show, as I referred to it. And, uh, it shocked me, but it was a dog. Someone had, you know, lost their dog and were suing and what an emotional distress. And the, the, the judge said, "No, a dog is, is, is c... | 25.28 | 3.024076 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966772.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966773 | [S1] Let me tell you, the most important decision that I had to make today was whether to bring my dog, who travels with me, to the set, or whether to have her up in somebody's office in our offices, which are also on this block. That took about 20 minutes. Well, will she be happy there? [S2] Ah. [S1] We can give her w... | 27.8 | 2.883547 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966773.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966774 | [S1] Uh, property, or deserve to have people treat their emotions, which they have- [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] ... with more dignity and respect. And I don't think that that necessarily extends to every living creature. I don't feel the same way about fish. [S2] Uh-huh. [S1] I mean, I don't want anything bad to happen to them, ... | 27.4 | 3.316098 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966774.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966775 | [S1] In the law. The wiggle room that really made for a just result all the time. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] It was consistent. But I don't think there's anything wrong about the law being a little inconsistent- [S2] Right. [S1] ... as long as the right thing happens at the end of the case. [S2] I agree. The law is an ass. [S1]... | 25.32 | 2.89428 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966775.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966777 | [S1] Women stand-ups. [S2] What? 'Cause I was listening to, watching a lot of your stuff. And, you know, you can be slightly off color, but you- [S1] A little bit. [S2] Yeah, a little bit off color. I said to my group, "I want you to name for me stand-up female comics who aren't raunchy." [S1] Oh. [S2] Stand-up. Not- [... | 27.92 | 2.897587 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966777.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966780 | [S1] Don't you think, and, and I don't know if you've encountered this in your profession because I know you were the only woman in your law class and you graduated first. But, um, is it women trying to be like men and that's what they, that's how they feel they can succeed? Well, men were raunchy, now I'll be raunchy.... | 22 | 2.971928 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966780.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966781 | [S1] Maybe. [S2] ... that idea though, right? [S1] Maybe. I mean, why wouldn't audiences be as interested in a female's musing about what they did or didn't do during the day? Like they're interested in Jerry Seinfeld, what, you know, how he got up and scrambled eggs. I mean, I, that, that's not funny when Jerry Seinfe... | 23.44 | 3.162466 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966781.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966782 | [S1] But I, I, I, is it because that's the only way that women can be recognized in the profession? [S2] Yeah, I don't- [S1] And I have a smutty mouth. [S2] Uh-huh. [S1] I mean, I do. I- [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... curse, but I punctuate sometimes my stories with, you know, with- [S2] Colorful. [S1] ... with colorful language.... | 27.16 | 2.902647 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966782.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966783 | [S1] Oh, nothing like strip club food. The, um, um, when did you go from, I assume you were a judge at the same time that your husband was a judge? [S2] Yes, I was six months before. [S1] Six months, six months before. [S2] Six before. [S1] And before that you were both also- [S2] Lawyers. [S1] You met as lawyers. [S2]... | 27.92 | 3.211173 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966783.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966784 | [S1] ... civil servants. [S2] And for New York, you're not saving a lot of money. [S1] No. [S2] And, uh, then you're ultra-rich. And how is your life different? | 11.36 | 3.081584 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966784.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966785 | [S1] Most people, Jerry and myself as well, we were civil servants and we had five kids and they were all smart enough to go to college and many were smart enough to go to professional school afterwards and so that all took money and- [S2] Five kids, that's a lot. [S1] We, and we, so we lived modestly. [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... | 27.2 | 2.943987 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966785.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966786 | [S1] So, having this program, uh, removed the financial stressor. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Which I have to tell you is a big deal. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] It's a big deal for me, a big deal for the family. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] It does, it removes just that stressor. Does it take away other stressors? Family stressors, um... | 20.16 | 3.121589 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966786.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966788 | [S1] You're absolutely right. I don't see why some people find that awful. [S2] Yeah. [S1] You know, I, I read that Barbara Streisand had cloned one of her dogs. [S2] Oh. [S1] And because she had a dog that she absolutely adored. [S2] Sure. Yeah. [S1] And she, it was getting old, whatever, it was getting older. I don't... | 27.2 | 3.159489 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966788.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966790 | [S1] Yeah. [S2] Along with the wealth, this is what I've found from friends of mine that have become enormously wealthy. They go, "Well, then you have your relatives and your friends all wanting some money from you." Because they go, "Well, you have 40 million. Why don't you give me two?" [S1] Well- [S2] Do you have tw... | 22.08 | 3.294862 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966790.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966792 | [S1] So I think that if you're smart and if you have some dough, and if you have nice kids, nice family, what you do is you get pleasure out of seeing them enjoy it while they're here. [S2] Yeah, yeah, yeah. [S1] A serious story. Are we allowed to do a serious story here? [S2] Of course. [S1] Of course. So, uh, my mom ... | 24.72 | 3.021254 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966792.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966793 | [S1] And she, she was 57. [S2] And how young were you? [S1] I was, mm, 38. [S2] Okay. [S1] And the year before she got sick, she had gotten a mink coat. | 11.68 | 3.294595 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966793.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966794 | [S1] and enjoy seeing you wearing the coat. [S2] Oh. [S1] Rather than waiting. You know, she didn't have to say rather than waiting, but they, the thrust of it was, I want to see you and it will give me pleasure to see- [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... to see you out and about with it. [S2] Uh-huh. [S1] Rather than- | 16.88 | 2.909068 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966794.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966795 | [S1] Waiting. So if you're smart, that's what you do. You don't have to, your relatives, your relative, people that you love, that you really love and that love you, shouldn't have to ask you if you can afford to make their lives more comfortable. [S2] Oh, right. [S1] And remove that financial stressor. [S2] Oh, right.... | 20.28 | 3.31443 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966795.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966796 | [S1] Of course, yeah. And also, since you didn't, uh, get, uh, ultra rich until later in life, you didn't have to worry about spoiling- [S2] Oh, I don't know about ultra, ultra rich. I don't know about ultra rich. I have a couple of bucks. [S1] Um, I heard Oprah asked you for a, uh- [S2] No. [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] No, no. ... | 24.72 | 2.842913 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_BV18t411Q7Q1_p13_m4-dialogue_0966796.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164650 | [S1] I like that, that film. [S2] Yeah. [S1] It's a good one. It's one you can watch many, many times. [S2] Yeah, yeah, yeah. [S1] So. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Is this going anywhere? [S2] Yeah. [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] It's going to my impression of Robert Shaw talking to, uh, um, uh, when he finds out, you know, that something's go... | 27.08 | 3.15624 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164650.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164652 | [S1] At Saturday Night Live, uh, uh, what's his name, came, uh, Michael Palin and John Cleese. Anyways, they were describing to me the early days, and they said that, uh, it was Cleese and Palin that went to Cambridge, with Terry Jones and, uh, and Eric Eitel went to- [S2] Oxford. [S1] ... Oxford. So the Oxford guys wo... | 28.84 | 3.453139 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164652.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164653 | [S1] When you think Oxford, that's how dumb I am. I don't even know the smartest one. I thought it would be Oxford. [S2] Well, Oxford is the Rhodes Scholarship people. [S1] Yeah. [S2] Yeah, they do nice work. [S1] And I remember that Jethro, uh, Bodine, he had also, he was a Rhodes Scholar. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Yeah, 'cause... | 20.08 | 3.044776 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164653.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164655 | [S1] I, I do know that when I was a, a kid, uh, I loved that show, uh, for the first three or four seasons, and then it just, like, fell off the, uh, table. And I never knew, was it me growing older and, and getting a little wiser to the lousy comedy, or was it that the comedy actually got lousier? [S2] Yeah. It's hard... | 25.04 | 3.209998 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164655.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164656 | [S1] Uh, let me ask you something. [S2] Huh? [S1] Uh, here's a joke that I've told, uh, around friends, and I, I've never known whether, uh, I can tell it- [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... in public. [S2] Okay. [S1] And I've felt like, with that in mind, this is the place to try it. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Uh, I was in India. [S2] Yeah.... | 22.08 | 3.047802 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164656.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164660 | [S1] Hey, what's the fastest you've ever gotten a car up to? I know you drive cars. [S2] Yeah. [S1] I should have, I should have inverted those? [S2] No, no, this is good. This is good. Uh, I actually have statistics for this. One was in the United States, one was in Germany. [S1] Germany, where they have the famous Au... | 29.24 | 2.944099 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164660.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164661 | [S1] That's him. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And a car. I mean, it's not him. [S2] In Germany, the Autobahn- [S1] Mostly the car. [S2] It was a, it was a Sunday. [S1] Wait, this is the same. This is the second record. [S2] In, in the, the European record. [S1] Oh, okay, okay, yeah. [S2] We have the American domestic record. [S1] Y... | 22.36 | 3.029903 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164661.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164662 | [S1] Yeah. [S2] Okay, now I just want everyone to know that this is nothing- [S1] Three days ago. [S2] There's been no pre-interview. There's been no, we have not discussed this beforehand, before the show. There's been no... Okay. No, I'm sorry. I, I want them to know. [S1] [LAUGHS] | 18.76 | 2.80682 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164662.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164663 | [S1] Uh, so we're, uh, and I want to do this because there's no speed limit. So I move over, I'm in the fast lane on the Autobahn. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Uh, and I, I nose it up to 150. [S2] Whew. [S1] And, and I'd never driven at 150 and I, I feel myself, uh, hey, 150. So, uh, I look into the mirror and there's a, a big Merc... | 25.84 | 3.281551 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164663.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164664 | [S1] Just the biggest, stupidest looking family Mercedes-Benz you can buy. And it's packed with people in the car. And the guy is flashing his lights. I'm doing 150. [S2] Oh, my God. [S1] And the guy with his family behind me is flashing his lights like, "Hey, asshole." [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Into the slow lane. [S2] [LAUG... | 29.6 | 3.021526 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164664.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164665 | [S1] Oh my God. [S2] And I was so shaken, we had to pull off at the, uh, whatever the rest, uh, stop, uh, word is for German, or, you know what I mean. [S1] Yeah, I thought, uh, verboten? [S2] Yeah, yeah. Batzimmer. I don't know. So I was- [S1] Hey, maybe the ones that were coming from church went faster 'cause they ha... | 26.92 | 3.18996 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164665.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164666 | [S1] I, uh, uh, was talking to a guy who was a sprinter and told me that, uh, uh, the mile was, uh, the mile was broken by Roger Bannister. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Four minute mile. Same year, 20 people broke it. Next year, 150 joined Bannister. And he said that it was completely mental, that, | 20.64 | 3.033078 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164666.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164667 | [S1] Yeah. And, and the, the American high school record for sub, uh, four minute mile was Jim... [S2] Thorpe. Jim Thorpe. [S1] No, it wasn't Jim Thorpe. [S2] Oh, oh. [S1] No, who was it? It was, it was very, yeah, it was very... [S2] It was a recent guy? [S1] No, no, no. Back in the 70s, 60s. [S2] Jay Bullock? Jim Jay... | 20.56 | 3.138154 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164667.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164668 | [S1] Hey, when you went to, uh, we talked a little bit about it when we talked last, about when you first came to Los Angeles. [S2] Yeah. [S1] What do you think, looking back, you would be, um, content with if you had worked as, as a, like you said, you would not want to be a, a game show host every day for decades upo... | 23.6 | 3.486087 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164668.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164669 | [S1] Couldn't have done that. [S2] So- [S1] I'm, I'm, I'm so limited in what I can do- [S2] Yeah. [S1] Uh, that if I couldn't have achieved this in a very narrow corridor of pursuit, I, I don't know. [S2] Yeah. [S1] I, I, in, in those days, I was drinking. I probably just drank myself to death. [S2] Yeah. You would dri... | 29.48 | 3.29296 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164669.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164671 | [S1] I mean, you know, people should be talking, crying. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Well, it says here, "What offers did you get over the decades that we would be surprised at?" Now, they must have asked you, it says here, to host Saturday Night Live at some point. [S2] Yeah, once. Once they did. Yeah, Lauren, I did. [S1] You ... | 18.16 | 3.108819 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164671.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164673 | [S1] No. [S2] Dick Shawn. [S1] Yeah, yeah. Uh, so it was tremendous. And, uh, I was awful. I was horrible. I was horrible. I was horrible. And I, and I dreaded it. I was lucky to have a job. You go over there and there's Mary Tyler Moore and you see her singing and dancing and they had, uh, uh, music in rehearsal and t... | 29.96 | 3.153825 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164673.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164674 | [S1] And we would, we would go to a, uh, a rehearsal room, myself and the, the women and everybody on the cast, and we would, you know, and, and I couldn't stand it. [S2] Yeah. [S1] So when the idea of, uh, going through that again, even, uh, I think would've been a great step up, Saturday Night Live, I just thought, "... | 22.56 | 2.945151 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164674.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164675 | [S1] Yeah, that's right. [S2] Do you think that's- [S1] And, and, and, and, and ruining the show, yeah. Humili- [S2] Fair enough. [S1] Humiliation was instant. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Uh, but then when you had to go ahead and mount the show, I didn't wanna be the guy that, "Oh, geez, it would've been fine if- [S2] Reckless. ... | 25.32 | 3.29784 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164675.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164677 | [S1] You're an infant. [S2] Here, let's, you read one. [S1] Uh, a lot of people have re- Uh, sorry, I'm a little nervous. I already fucked it up. [S2] No, you didn't. Come on. [S1] A lot of people are excited for self-driving cars, and so am I. Finally, I'll feel what it's like to kill without having any personal respo... | 24.92 | 3.040597 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164677.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164678 | [S1] I had this conversation earlier today. We were on, uh, one of the freeways. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And I just, uh, posed the question, have we really verified the advantage, what it is- [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... for self-driving cars? Like you're, well, your life would be easier because you don't drive. [S2] I, I know. So I'd ... | 29.72 | 3.088247 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164678.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164679 | [S1] Oh, well, I wouldn't drive it. I'd be, I guess I'd be a self-passenger. [S2] Well, no, no, no. It is self-driving car. The car drives itself. [S1] Uh-huh. Right, right. How, what, why is it different than Uber? [S2] No, no, I know why it's- [S1] Well, first of all, the self-driving car- [S2] I'm just, I'm just- | 14.92 | 2.995909 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164679.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164680 | [S1] You know, when I did the, the other day, uh, I had to go into, uh, Dick's. You ever been to- [S2] Dick's Sporting Goods? Well, first of all, I applaud them for not selling AR-50s. [S1] They used to, and they took them off the shelves. You cannot buy one there. Yeah. Uh, but Dick's, uh, I love it because, uh, th- n... | 28.24 | 3.160969 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164680.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164681 | [S1] So I go into the, uh, fishing department and I need some, uh, fishing items. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Little minor things. And then I go to the, uh, the woman. [S2] You know fishing? [S1] Yeah. The woman standing behind the fishing counter and I, I said, knowing the answer already, I said, "Uh, may I pay for these here?" A... | 28.08 | 3.122923 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164681.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164682 | [S1] I put my fishing gear down on the, uh, the thing and the, and the guy says, "Oh, you look like a fisherman," says to me. And I said, "Oh, thank you." I said, "You know, it's easier to look like a fisherman than it actually is to catch fish." [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] And the, and the guy says, "[LAUGHS] That's right." He... | 27.44 | 3.449595 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164682.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164684 | [S1] Yeah, the 20th. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Yeah. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Yeah. [S2] I, I, um, I wish I could. I admire people who do it. Uh, like I, uh, Seinfeld and yourself and Leno. There, there are guys, men and women, uh, who, who love doing this, can't wait to do it. And when I was doing it on the road, every afternoon at two ... | 23.36 | 3.342928 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164684.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164686 | [S1] for this show. [S2] Oh, no, by the way, we have to go, Dave. [S1] Yes, yes, yes. [S2] We have to go. [S1] Yeah. [S2] But we made a song up to sing. [S1] Oh, God. [S2] Well, what about this? Male, not for you to sing, though. You can just watch us. Male authors are obsessed. This is what, you know, going back to, t... | 20.16 | 2.970876 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_BV18t411Q7Q1_p14_m4-dialogue_0164686.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891142 | [S1] Bad, sad. [S2] Yeah. Wait, you know, when I think Billy Bob, I'm trying to think of a story. Billy Bob told me one time about, uh, it wasn't Wheeler-Jennings. It was, um, it was Merle Haggard. [S1] Yeah. [S2] I hope I get this right. If I don't just edit it out, I'm gonna make it loose. [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] He said,... | 29.16 | 3.052234 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891142.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891143 | [S1] And it was true. He lived too far down from us and we, you could go there in the middle of the night, the light would be on in the kitchen and he'd be in the living room of the transistor radio in his, uh, shorts and undershirt with a bottle of whiskey. [S2] Oh, wow. [S1] But not, never, never, uh, it wasn't a soc... | 16.4 | 3.08929 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891143.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891144 | [S1] I, I met Merle Haggard. Uh, the cool thing about LA is nobody likes country music, so you can go and see, like, Chris Christopherson, with 200 people, you know? So I saw Merle Haggard. So the girl that was running the, the, the, the joint, uh, she goes, "Oh, yeah." I go, "Well, do you think there's any chance I, I... | 29.16 | 2.977741 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891144.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891149 | [S1] ... kind of composes himself. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Composes himself. He goes, "Hey, Michael, how you doing?" Says, "Uh, what have you been doing?" And, "Oh, just working a little bit. And anyway, I don't want to take up your time." He goes, "No, no, no. So what's going on?" And I go, "Oh, I don't know. You know, we ... | 18.52 | 2.881356 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891149.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891152 | [S1] I know, but I think maybe, maybe for its time or something that I've, that's- [S2] Oh, no, the Marks- [S1] ... lost on me. I, I, that's all. I know. People tell me that the, that those other guys are the greatest guys in the world, the Three Stooges. I didn't understand the person that- [S2] No, I never, no, I nev... | 29.92 | 3.056674 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891152.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891156 | [S1] You were a comet. That's how I know you. [S2] I know. [S1] That's the only way I know you. You were saying, like, you were flying in somewhere, Newark or something, and the guy comes on, the, the pilot, you know the joke? [S2] Yeah. [S1] I think you thought, okay, I'll say what I think it is. [S2] Okay. [S1] This ... | 15.32 | 3.103358 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891156.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891157 | [S1] It fits. Very good. [S2] But you are from Pittsburgh, right? [S1] Yeah. Outside of Pittsburgh. [S2] Another joke. And I get in trouble for this, 'cause when I, uh, went to Saturday Night Live, uh, John Lovett's came and hosted it. I'm like, "Why are you stealing Michael Keaton's fret?" Right? [S1] Yeah. [S2] And h... | 21.24 | 3.22188 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891157.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891158 | [S1] But I liked how- [S2] We'd hang around. [S1] ... they'd film noir, they had their, their, their, there, it was a parallel universe of stars. It'd be like Robert Ryan and, you know, sometimes you'd have Robert Mitchum or, um, what was, what's the movie I'm thinking with Robert Mitchum? [S2] Out of the Past? [S1] Ou... | 25.04 | 3.024543 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891158.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891159 | [S1] What was that Wayne line where, uh, about where they're talking about guns and women? [S2] Oh, no, no. There's a famous movie called The Cellular Closet where, where it's about gay people who worked in Hollywood back in the old days, but, uh, they couldn't just say they were gay or write gay- [S1] Right, right. [S... | 22.32 | 3.066196 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891159.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891160 | [S1] ... Red, was it Red River, with John Wayne and Montgomery Clift and this other guy. And John Wayne's way, he's inside, and they're outside, right? And, uh, uh, the one guy goes up to Montgomery Clift, he goes, and Montgomery Clift goes, "Hey, I like your gun." He goes, "Yeah, you like guns?" He goes, "Yeah, I like... | 27.28 | 3.217954 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891160.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891162 | [S1] It's coincidental. And you know, this is a thing that you and I have in common. Um, one, the two best stand-ups that ever lived, and the other, we're both half Scottish and half Irish. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Isn't that interesting? | 16.12 | 3.127996 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891162.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891163 | [S1] Oh, they would never have. [S2] No. [S1] Why would they like that? [S2] I stood in there for like 40 minutes during an afternoon. You know those, like the door open, that hot, that sun comes into a bar and they're cleaning up, you know, some of the, like yarn and Lysol. [S1] Yeah. [S2] Yarn and Lysol combo. [S1] Y... | 27.28 | 2.915317 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891163.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891164 | [S1] So I went out one afternoon, I think I had to get a bus out there, and I had to go over and, and I talked to this guy. They wouldn't even talk to me. They'd walk right by me, and the owner was sitting there just kind of like, and he knew that I had to introduce myself and say, "You know, I was wondering if I, you ... | 28.28 | 3.254562 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891164.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891165 | [S1] country. [S2] At that time. [S1] Billy Joe Shaver, right? [S2] Yeah. [S1] Who I love. He's actually my best friend. But, uh- [S2] Is that true? Do you know? [S1] Yeah. [S2] Really? [S1] Yeah. [S2] Yeah. [S1] I know him very well. But every time he, he comes here, he's like- [S2] He's a very Christian dude, isn't h... | 15.08 | 3.345558 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891165.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891167 | [S1] Man. [S2] My dad, I remember when I was young, he took me to see, uh, George Jones. And he, he, my dad would see George Jones, like, ten times. And he said, "Sometimes his, uh, his show close, stops early." And he goes, "The way you can tell 'cause he'd been drinking." [S1] Yeah. [S2] And he always ends with, um, ... | 29.64 | 3.344805 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891167.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891175 | [S1] Having said that, oddly enough, are we back? [S2] Yes. [S1] Hey, we're back with the, uh, with the fantastic Michael Keaton. So, you know, sometimes people come out and they're not as funny as you are, so we write their jokes so they can say jokes. [S2] Oh, okay. [S1] You know, but I thought this would be cool for... | 25.16 | 3.102834 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891175.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891177 | [S1] We're going to do. I'm going to give you- [S2] That was strong. [S1] This is strong. [S2] All right. [S1] I would not lead you down a, a path astray. So I'm going to give you the strongest joke. Uh, I'll do one so it'll, it'll be a palette. Okay. When Mozart would sit down to compose, [CLEARS THROAT] this is, this... | 29.16 | 3.142007 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_BV18t411Q7Q1_p18_m4-dialogue_0891177.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371200 | [S1] ... [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] But it really happened, and, uh- [S2] Yeah. [S1] It's just another thing. You get to lean into that, that pain, you know? You gotta get started liking pain. That's why I'm here today. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] How many times did you say that you were at death's door? [S1] Oh, Jesus, I... | 26.76 | 3.219233 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371200.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371201 | [S1] I can't count all my friends, I can't count all my fingers, either. [S2] [LAUGHS] Where are your fingers, anyway? [S1] I got these lopped off at a, at a sawmill accident. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And I had to grab 'em, picked 'em up, and I just read a, a, a Japanese thing about they had, they had just sold these fingers by... | 25.48 | 3.457884 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371201.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371202 | [S1] I mean, spawned me around, even in the shape I was in. And, uh, she said, "Mr. Billy, can I have them fingers?" And I said, "Say what?" She said, "Can I have them fingers?" I said, "Well, fair question. What you gonna do with them?" She said, "I'm gonna put them in a jar and I'll keep them 'till the day I die." An... | 29.48 | 2.87113 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371202.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371204 | [S1] So I asked a friend of yours, Robert Duvall. [S2] Oh, my goodness. [S1] And I consider Robert Duvall the best actor in the entire country. [S2] Well, he could, he is. [S1] And so I asked him straight out, 'cause my theory is- [S2] But you know what actors are like. [S1] My theory is that if you're the best, you kn... | 23.68 | 3.442473 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371204.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371205 | [S1] But you're the musical heir to Hank Williams, in my mind. And, uh- [S2] That's, that's good. [S1] This is the way I think of it. It's the same way I think of comedians, because- [S2] It'll work. [S1] ... you have comic actors, and then you have writers, and then you have stand-up comedians. The stand-up comedians ... | 21.52 | 3.267514 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371205.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371206 | [S1] Give him a big hand. [S2] Now, my question to you is this. Do you agree with that, that you're the best? 'Cause I always think somebody is the best and always- [S1] I'm as good as I can be, yeah. [S2] Good as you can be, but- [S1] Yeah. [S2] ... do you see anybody around- [S1] I'm still- [S2] ... any better? [S1] ... | 22.56 | 2.986173 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371206.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371208 | [S1] What did you think of an outhouse? 'Cause that's what I remember as the worst thing about growing up on a farm. [S2] Yeah, well, uh- [S1] Goddamn outhouse. [S2] Yeah. [S1] It's the most terrifying place in the fucking world for a child. [S2] Well, yeah, for a child. [S1] Middle of the night. [S2] Yeah, you could d... | 26.8 | 3.260596 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371208.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371210 | [S1] So my brother and I would pull out this big- [S2] I've never, I've never really thought of that. [S1] My, my brother and I would pull out this big trough of shit, human shit, and then we would have to take my, my father would make us take it way out to the North 40 where we'd bury it, and then my brother and I go,... | 28.16 | 3.426976 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371210.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371212 | [S1] Heroes came out. So- [S2] Well, I must have wrote it when I was, well, I wrote it way back in when I was in my late 20s. [S1] When you were in your late 20s. [S2] And I came up there and I went to Charlie Lueven, and Charlie Lueven, I don't know if you ever heard of him, but- [S1] Yeah, sure I have. [S2] But he sa... | 24.84 | 3.443637 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371212.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371215 | [S1] This is Billy Joe's book, by the way. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] It's called Hong Kong- [S2] I'm so full of crap, man. [S1] Oh, Hong Kong Hero, isn't it? Yeah. Hong Kong Hero, Bill Joe Schaver. That's such an awesome picture. That's from- [S2] Oh, it is. | 12.56 | 2.918787 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371215.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371216 | [S1] Yeah, it is. Chris, Chris Thompson produced an album, uh, Old Five and Diamonds. [S2] Yeah. [S1] He heard me one night when I was fixing to leave Nashville. I was out at Bobby Bear's house, and I'm trying to get out the door, and they, he made me sit back down. Bobby said, "Sit back down." "Yeah," he said, "play m... | 27.6 | 3.329671 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371216.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371217 | [S1] And I thought he was fucking with me, you know. I really did. [S2] Yeah. [S1] I honestly thought he was, and I jumped in my pickup. I had a pickup by then. I went back to Texas and went to, I think I went to washing dishes again. But anyway, oh, it took Bobby about several months to track me down, but he finally t... | 29.8 | 3.479393 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371217.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371219 | [S1] It, it, it's unbelievably right. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Oh, it upset me so bad. And I thought, well, you know, just a little bit of it's good. [S2] Yeah. [S1] You know, better than nothing. But, but that's kind of the way Nashville did. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] When I first came here, he told me, he said, "You have to," Bobb... | 28.16 | 3.329635 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371219.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371220 | [S1] He's the only one, really, that knew I had good songs. [S2] Hey, you remember that song, uh, Cocaine Blues? [S1] Yes, I do. [S2] Yeah. You like that song? [S1] Yeah, I liked it. [S2] It's a great opening line, 'cause it's so fat. And they're like, you know, "I shot... I took..." First of all, he says that he took ... | 22.84 | 3.374212 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_18662637_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_BV18t411Q7Q1_p19_m4-dialogue_0371220.mp3 | [
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