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https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hamburger-for-my-valentine_b_6682676.html
hamburger for my valentine
0
https://politics.theonion.com/government-squandering-social-security-funds-on-cake-1819564189
government squandering social security funds on cake
1
https://local.theonion.com/still-too-early-to-tell-if-pulling-chain-turned-overhea-1819592846
still too early to tell if pulling chain turned overhead fan off
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/if-you-trust-big-corporations-dont-read-this_us_5a3845bce4b0578d1beb7203
if you trust big corporations, don't read this
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/february-heat-waves_us_58afbb53e4b0780bac2808f7
freaky february heat waves trigger more chills over climate change
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/climate-change-threatens-_4_n_6205914.html
climate change may melt the glaciers from glacier national park
0
https://local.theonion.com/relationship-tragically-enters-going-to-bathroom-with-d-1819569661
relationship tragically enters going-to-bathroom-with-door-open stage
1
https://local.theonion.com/guidance-counselor-reminds-self-mutilating-drug-user-ab-1819570517
guidance counselor reminds self-mutilating drug user about sat deadlines
1
https://sports.theonion.com/sources-nfl-knew-what-evil-lurking-within-heart-of-man-1819576933
sources: nfl knew what evil lurking within heart of man
1
https://local.theonion.com/man-annoyed-by-travel-plaza-s-abridged-pizza-hut-menu-1822086785
man annoyed by travel plaza's abridged pizza hut menu
1
https://politics.theonion.com/peter-strzok-summoned-before-congress-again-for-texts-c-1827552946
peter strzok summoned before congress again for texts calling trey gowdy 'a pissy little shithead'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/millennials-may-have-aban_b_7337276.html
millennials may have abandoned the church, but god has not abandoned them
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gaby-hoffmann-pregnant_n_5466050.html
gaby hoffmann is pregnant with first child
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/you-wanted-government-run-like-a-business-you-got_us_5a00ec93e4b05c841816655f
you wanted government run like a business? you got it.
0
https://www.theonion.com/bear-emerges-from-hibernation-refreshed-and-ready-to-ki-1819591133
bear emerges from hibernation refreshed and ready to kill
1
https://politics.theonion.com/trump-assures-nation-that-decision-for-syrian-airstrike-1819579813
trump assures nation that decision for syrian airstrikes came after carefully considering all his passing whims
1
https://politics.theonion.com/bush-announces-8-month-plan-to-steal-favorite-desk-lamp-1819569839
bush announces 8-month plan to steal favorite desk lamp
1
https://www.theonion.com/study-finds-backing-down-in-fight-with-loved-one-extrem-1819576447
study finds backing down in fight with loved one extremely harmful to relationship
1
https://politics.theonion.com/fearful-americans-stockpiling-facts-before-federal-gove-1819579589
fearful americans stockpiling facts before federal government comes to take them away
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/john-oliver-go-fcc-yourself_us_59101580e4b0e7021e98dc23
john oliver rallies 'time-wasters and troublemakers' to fight the fcc
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/ridley-scott-trades-russell-crowe-to-tim-burton-for-joh-1819571507
ridley scott trades russell crowe to tim burton for johnny depp
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://singularityhub.com/2016/03/31/the-next-water-crisis-is-looming-how-can-tech-help/
the next water crisis is looming — how can tech help?
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/christian-rock-uninspired-1819568319
christian rock uninspired
1
https://www.theonion.com/fbi-agent-still-tasked-with-following-noam-chomsky-arou-1829496504
fbi agent still tasked with following noam chomsky around prepares for another day in local panera
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-sikh-looks-like_n_5736518.html
this is what sikh looks like
0
https://politics.theonion.com/paul-ryan-announces-new-congress-sexual-harassment-trai-1820545075
paul ryan announces new congress sexual harassment training will create safe work atmosphere, plausible deniability
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://qz.com/685351/the-thing-that-will-wreck-many-americans-retirement/
the thing that will wreck many americans' retirement
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/snl-putin-friends-defend_us_585650dfe4b0390447092351
vladimir putin's childhood besties defend their 'petty' pal in 'snl' spoof
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/deray-mckesson-sues-baton-rouge-police_us_57a3c7a9e4b021fd987823ee
deray mckesson sues baton rouge police over protest arrests
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/swedish-expert-fox-news_us_58b294d1e4b060480e089f69
swedes stumped by swedish 'national security adviser' on fox
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/meeting-logs-obama-quietl_b_5496696.html
meeting logs: obama quietly coddling big oil on 'bomb trains' regulations
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/fcc-chief-cites-special-occasion-for-allowing-vaginal-p-1819572481
fcc chief cites special occasion for allowing vaginal penetration on network sitcom
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/setting-up-the-jokes-for_b_6001264.html
setting up the jokes for maximum effect
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-law-and-order_us_57ea3f5de4b024a52d2a6474
twitter applauds trump's demands for 'law and order'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ecuador-global-tax-dodging_us_5877e5c9e4b0b3c7a7b05339
new developing nations leader has big plans to crack down on global tax dodging
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/wisdom-from-a-veteran-adv_b_6963782.html
wisdom from a veteran advisor in family business
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/female-ceos_us_57179bdde4b0018f9cbbc80c
it's not getting any easier for women to become ceos
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/us-appeals-ruling-against-trumps-revised-travel-ban-to-higher-court_us_58cc4ef1e4b0ec9d29dc27e5
u.s. appeals ruling against trump's revised travel ban to higher court
0
https://local.theonion.com/woman-s-children-officially-old-enough-to-pony-up-for-g-1829060433
woman's children officially old enough to pony up for good birthday gift this year
1
https://www.theonion.com/citizens-to-vote-on-young-or-old-reagan-for-15-bill-1819565948
citizens to vote on young or old reagan for $15 bill
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/three-good-reasons-to-ski_b_8786364.html
three good reasons to skip the airport lounge
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-michael-moore-play_us_59f55635e4b07fdc5fbe9456
donald trump concedes he's 'not at all presidential' as he slams michael moore play
0
https://local.theonion.com/woman-launches-into-4-minute-self-deprecating-preamble-1819577249
woman launches into 4-minute self-deprecating preamble before speaking mind
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/obamacare-supreme-court-states_n_7422438.html
here's how many people in each state may not be able to afford insurance if the supreme court rules against obamacare
0
https://www.theonion.com/cuban-army-honors-fidel-castro-with-21-gun-firing-squad-1819592709
cuban army honors fidel castro with 21-gun firing squad
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.wsj.com/article_email/the-gops-mexico-derangement-1465254607-lMyQjAxMTI2MjA5NzUwNjc1Wj
the gop's mexico derangement
0
https://www.theonion.com/chloe-kim-recalls-growing-up-under-parents-intense-pres-1823004391
chloe kim recalls growing up under parents' intense pressure to just chillax and shred the gnar gnar
1
https://local.theonion.com/myrtle-beach-resident-refuses-to-evacuate-from-family-s-1828951479
myrtle beach resident refuses to evacuate from family's ancestral ron jon surf shop
1
https://local.theonion.com/man-prowling-at-airport-gate-ready-to-pounce-like-jungl-1819578761
man prowling at airport gate ready to pounce like jungle cat at first sign of boarding
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/matthew-mcconaughey-fake-australian-accent_us_585ceffae4b0eb586485f431
matthew mcconaughey once faked an australian accent for an entire year
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/a-somali-refugees-american-story_us_58c58118e4b070e55af9f078
a somali refugee's american story
0
https://www.theonion.com/authorities-say-blacklight-analysis-shows-velvet-poster-1829819994
authorities say blacklight analysis shows velvet poster of mushroom kingdom looking even cooler than previously imagined
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bernie-sanders-jane-sanders-fbi-investigation_us_594fc816e4b0da2c731c2d1d
facing fbi bank fraud investigation, bernie and jane sanders hire lawyers
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-with-serious-mental-illness-committed-to-city-bus-1819577386
man with serious mental illness committed to city bus
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/enda-the-nightmare-scenario_b_5587459.html
enda: the nightmare scenario in which gopers push a bad bill that gay groups dropped
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-hillary-clinton-virginia-county_us_56d454b3e4b03260bf776bc4
it's already looking like trump vs. clinton in this swing virginia county
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/my-911-walk-your-talk-pil_b_11951746.html
my 9/11 walk your talk pilgrimage
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/4-tips-to-help-your-brand_b_6423868.html
4 tips to help your brand reach the millennial market
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ryan-coogler-would-love-women-wakanda-spinoff_us_5af990f9e4b032b10bfcf692
ryan coogler would love to see a women of wakanda spinoff
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mcmaster-cant-remember-if-trump-called-comey-a-nut-job-in-meeting-with-russians_us_5921a9f5e4b03b485cb23631
mcmaster can't remember if trump called comey a 'nut job' in meeting with russians
0
https://local.theonion.com/alignment-of-6-071-completely-independent-variables-nec-1819578528
alignment of 6,071 completely independent variables necessary for man to feel okay
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chicago-west-debut-kylie-jenner-baby-video_us_5a785620e4b0905433b6997c
chicago west makes her debut in kylie jenner's baby announcement
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/beauty-legend-bobbi-brown-on-why-you-should-probably_us_591f23e4e4b07617ae4cbb87
beauty legend bobbi brown on why you should probably throw away your sunblock and skip the botox
0
https://politics.theonion.com/obama-warns-he-may-cease-to-exist-unless-america-believ-1819570313
obama warns he may cease to exist unless america believes in him
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/nation-surprised-to-realize-it-wants-more-john-travolta-1819575992
nation surprised to realize it wants more john travolta
1
https://local.theonion.com/woman-constantly-treating-herself-for-once-1819571517
woman constantly treating herself for once
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/macron-hackers-hillary-clinton-dnc_us_58ff3ccde4b0c46f078220b1
russians who hacked dnc reportedly target france's presidential frontrunner
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-mika-brzezinski_us_5957a565e4b0da2c7323cdf3
trump launches another sexist tweet in newest attack on 'morning joe' hosts
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/miami-archbishop-gay-marriage_n_6439454.html
miami archbishop warns employees: supporting gay marriage could cost you your job
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/kevin-hart-just-going-to-assume-he-s-in-space-jam-2-u-1829199974
kevin hart just going to assume he's in 'space jam 2' unless he hears otherwise
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bernie-sanders-millennials-poll_us_56699fade4b0f290e5222a60
young democrats prefer bernie sanders, new poll finds
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ken-bone-takes-over-the-internet_us_57fbec03e4b0e655eab6bf69
yes, let's just ignore trump's hateful rhetoric and laugh about the guy in the sweater
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/world-cup-vs-planet-earth_b_5581374.html
world cup vs. planet earth
0
https://local.theonion.com/hire-of-local-moron-gives-nation-hope-for-employment-1819574010
hire of local moron gives nation hope for employment
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/this-site-lets-parents-easily-show-their-kids-how-to-give-back_us_5a313efee4b07ff75aff76e8
this site lets parents easily show their kids how to give back
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-who-stood-and-watched-robbery-acted-on-pure-instinc-1819580160
man who stood and watched robbery acted on pure instinct
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/elizabeth-lesser-repairing-a-broken-relationship_us_57ed5a77e4b082aad9b9f46c
this may be holding you back from repairing a broken relationship
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.thefiscaltimes.com/2016/08/17/Cool-Jobs-Baby-Boomers-Who-Want-Work-Retirement
'cool jobs' for baby boomers who want to work in retirement
0
https://www.theonion.com/guatemalan-earthquake-registers-0-3-on-area-mans-consci-1819565198
guatemalan earthquake registers 0.3 on area man's consciousness
1
https://www.theonion.com/national-geographic-increases-ideological-diversity-b-1832592053
'national geographic' increases ideological diversity by hiring first anti-tree-frog writer
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/family-rewrites-in-da-club-to-celebrate-back-to-school-season_us_5992ff82e4b08a24727760b0
family rewrites 'in da club' to celebrate back-to-school season
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-to-survive-the-senior-year-stressfest_b_5807056.html
how to survive the senior year stressfest
0
https://www.theonion.com/nation-currently-more-sympathetic-to-demise-of-planet-k-1819575156
nation currently more sympathetic to demise of planet krypton than plight of syria
1
https://local.theonion.com/family-excited-to-see-dad-making-friends-in-new-neighbo-1819580122
family excited to see dad making friends in new neighborhood
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nana-finally-makes-it-to_b_6041314.html
nana finally makes it to never land in battle for the book!
0
https://www.theonion.com/stoned-extraterrestrial-stumbles-across-hidden-message-1819579805
stoned extraterrestrial stumbles across hidden message after listening to golden record backwards
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/camera-iphone_n_7104976.html
i misplaced my fancy camera on assignment in peru, but my iphone saved the day
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/helen-mirren-prince_us_57255a90e4b01a5ebde5d74d
helen mirren paid tribute to prince with a purple dress and a fake tattoo
0
https://local.theonion.com/courtroom-artist-clearly-infatuated-with-bailiff-1819591358
courtroom artist clearly infatuated with bailiff
1
https://local.theonion.com/man-completely-blindsided-by-seemingly-normal-stranger-1821986094
man completely blindsided by seemingly normal stranger telling him to 'have a blessed day'
1
https://politics.theonion.com/eagle_warrior_1776-horrified-to-discover-its-entire-lif-1819580305
eagle_warrior_1776 horrified to discover its entire life a sham created by russians to tilt u.s. election
1
https://www.theonion.com/nra-calls-for-department-of-education-to-provide-every-1828662882
nra calls for department of education to provide every student with body bag
1
https://local.theonion.com/fourth-grader-s-world-war-ii-project-vastly-oversimplif-1819572777
fourth-grader's world war ii project vastly oversimplifies importance of air combat, uncle reports
1
https://www.theonion.com/raid-recalls-entire-line-of-insecticide-after-realizing-1828656335
raid recalls entire line of insecticide after realizing food chain would collapse without bugs
1
https://www.theonion.com/ferguson-decision-reaffirms-right-of-police-to-use-dead-1819577243
ferguson decision reaffirms right of police to use deadly force when they feel sufficiently inclined
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chikungunya-malaysia-zika-dengue_us_5a5cfd70e4b04f3c55a51fb9
how humans are laying out the welcome mat for mosquitoes and the diseases they carry
0
https://local.theonion.com/shit-parking-ticket-fuck-1819565184
shit parking ticket fuck
1
https://www.theonion.com/washington-post-offers-non-subscribers-10-free-articles-1827491221
washington post offers non-subscribers 10 free articles to fact-check per month
1
https://local.theonion.com/precocious-teen-able-to-read-write-1819586411
precocious teen able to read, write
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.pjstar.com/news/20160123/aarp-warns-of-sweepstakes-scams
aarp warns of sweepstakes scams
0