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https://www.theonion.com/all-proceeds-no-longer-going-to-charity-1819566257
all proceeds no longer going to charity
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/-and-justice-for-all_b_6729454.html
... and justice for all
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-who-encourages-childs-destructive-id-referred-to-as-1819573286
man who encourages child's destructive id referred to as 'good with kids'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trumpacandy-took-over-twitter-and-it-was-gloriously-sweet_us_57e2e4a3e4b0e80b1b9ffade
#trumpacandy took over twitter and it was gloriously sweet
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-to-chill-wine-fast_us_5665de80e4b079b2818f75cb
this no-brainer trick chills wine really quickly
0
https://politics.theonion.com/bush-still-getting-clintons-mail-1819565930
bush still getting clinton's mail
1
https://www.theonion.com/historical-archives-by-many-on-lookers-and-passers-bye-1819570251
historical archives: by many on-lookers and passers-bye, seen to depart out mortal vale in a boothe
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lake-bell-baby_n_6047166.html
lake bell welcomes baby girl
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jobs-growth-democrats_us_56d9d87ae4b0000de4047666
there are a lot more jobs. but that isn't helping democrats for one key reason.
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fear-not-game-of-thones-fans-the-brexit-wont-affect-the-show_us_576d5b93e4b0dbb1bbba6226
fear not, 'game of thones' fans: the brexit won't affect the show
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/geo-group-whistleblower-e_b_7309916.html
geo group whistleblower exposes first amendment violations, lack of officer training, and poor conditions at the adelanto detention center
0
https://www.theonion.com/coworker-insists-on-describing-entire-plot-of-old-spice-1819574931
coworker insists on describing entire plot of old spice commercial
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/g20-leaders-must-turn-the_b_6162800.html
g20 leaders must turn the tide on inequality and climate change
0
https://politics.theonion.com/cia-admits-its-good-at-overthrowing-stuff-not-so-much-1819566213
cia admits it's good at overthrowing stuff, not so much the intelligence
1
https://www.theonion.com/hot-n-nasty-butt-cum-chixx-to-appear-as-creative-concep-1819564971
'hot 'n' nasty butt cum chixx' to appear as 'creative concepts' on credit-card bill
1
https://www.theonion.com/power-plant-employee-sneaks-electricity-home-in-lunchbo-1819587310
power-plant employee sneaks electricity home in lunchbox
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/gabrielle-union-metoo-white-women_us_5a29946ae4b03ece0300fd61
gabrielle union on the #metoo movement: 'the floodgates have opened for white women'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/cloud-that-rains-tequila_us_58d1e2cae4b02d33b746c510
margarita lovers, behold: someone made a cloud that rains tequila
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/north-carolina-senate_n_5697624.html
key senate race deeply divides men and women
0
https://www.theonion.com/some-stupid-thing-making-the-rounds-among-your-facebook-1819575484
some stupid thing making the rounds among your facebook friends today
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/judge-blocks-transgender-bathroom-law_us_57b4932fe4b04ff88399dd0d
judge blocks federal government from enforcing transgender guidance in schools nationwide
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-mediaeval-greek-fortr_b_9821882.html
the mediaeval greek fortress town of monemvasia: spring break 2016, breaking bad on the looney front - part 6
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/wendy-williams-faints-on-live-tv-dressed-as-the-statue-of-liberty_us_59f894d6e4b09b5c25693ab3
wendy williams faints on live tv dressed as the statue of liberty
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/churches-vandalized-trump-racist-messages_us_5829ef55e4b060adb56f65fd
religious leaders condemn hateful, trump-inspired vandalism at 2 churches
0
https://www.theonion.com/new-study-finds-blacks-more-likely-1819571950
new study finds blacks more likely
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/conversation-to-stop-having_us_5654cb28e4b0879a5b0cd06a
the conversation women everywhere need to stop having
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-with-backed-up-shower-drain-enjoys-luxurious-foot-s-1825176832
man with backed-up shower drain enjoys luxurious foot soak
1
https://www.theonion.com/er-doctor-secretly-thinks-of-self-as-wards-george-cloon-1819566297
er doctor secretly thinks of self as ward's george clooney
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/wasted-cash-in-the-us-fis_b_5577903.html
wasted cash in the us fishing industry
0
https://local.theonion.com/coworkers-each-putting-in-herculean-effort-to-sustain-c-1819577033
coworkers each putting in herculean effort to sustain conversation for entire commute
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/paris-fashion-week_us_57f3ec02e4b0703f75915947
your fall outfit inspo, courtesy of paris fashion week
0
https://politics.theonion.com/i-can-t-do-this-again-shaking-sweating-donald-trump-1819578643
'i can't do this again,' shaking, sweating donald trump says after nervously vomiting before rally
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/tig-notaro-topless-conan_us_55d5d668e4b0ab468d9febcb
tig notaro discusses her amazing topless performance with conan
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/bottled-water-consumption-overtake-soda_us_57166390e4b06f35cb70be9f
americans finally found something to drink that's better than soda
0
https://local.theonion.com/area-man-too-poor-to-afford-movers-too-old-to-get-help-1819591304
area man too poor to afford movers, too old to get help from his friends
1
https://www.theonion.com/study-majority-of-time-machine-owners-use-device-prima-1819577955
study: majority of time machine owners use device primarily to get couple more hours of sleep
1
https://local.theonion.com/man-trying-to-get-out-of-executioner-duty-1819576370
man trying to get out of executioner duty
1
https://local.theonion.com/trivial-pursuit-game-reveals-man-lacks-knowledge-of-bas-1819573675
trivial pursuit game reveals man lacks knowledge of basic social skills
1
https://www.theonion.com/market-rallies-after-fed-chief-shows-off-huge-wad-of-ca-1835255863
market rallies after fed chief shows off huge wad of cash
1
https://politics.theonion.com/postmaster-general-letter-carrier-surge-is-working-1819569449
postmaster general: 'letter carrier surge is working'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/putin-north-korea_us_59b0f253e4b0b5e53103a614
russian president: saber-rattling is counterproductive with north korea. it's impossible to scare them.
0
https://www.theonion.com/god-pissed-after-learning-cost-to-replace-earth-s-core-1819579863
god pissed after learning cost to replace earth's core
1
https://local.theonion.com/entire-pickup-game-spent-consumed-by-fear-of-being-pass-1835524860
entire pickup game spent consumed by fear of being passed to
1
https://www.theonion.com/no-makeup-look-easier-to-achieve-than-elle-claims-1819567390
no-makeup look easier to achieve than elle claims
1
https://www.theonion.com/magical-gallery-transforms-dull-objects-into-art-1819566921
magical gallery transforms dull objects into art
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/did-ernest-hemingway-have-an-affair-with-his-sister_us_58f6382be4b048372700dbad
did ernest hemingway have an affair with his sister-in-law?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/washington-redskins-redhawks-name-fake-site_us_5a318d25e4b01bdd765999d0
native american activists create spoof website to call for redskins name change
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nordstrom-pumpkin-spice-search-basic-tee_us_59b96ed9e4b02da0e13e8320
this is what happens when you search 'pumpkin spice' on nordstrom
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/russia-military-exercises_n_6806400.html
russia holds large-scale military exercises in disputed territories
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/a-look-into-the-nyc-that-was-never-built_us_58470e9ce4b05236f1106004
a look into the nyc that was never built
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/street-photography-in-stockholm_b_5335413.html
street photography in stockholm (pt. 2)
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/3-reminders-that-can-help-you-raise-resilient-kids_b_5585453.html
3 reminders that can help you raise resilient kids
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/redstate-leon-wolf-erick-erickson_us_5612acdce4b0dd85030cb569
redstate names leon wolf managing editor as erick erickson prepares exit
0
https://local.theonion.com/music-compels-weak-man-to-dance-1827968846
music compels weak man to dance
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/penn-state-sandusky-fined_us_581bb8a0e4b0e80b02c8e3f0
penn state fined record $2.4 million over sandusky case
0
https://www.theonion.com/candy-purchase-puts-yet-more-money-in-raisinets-bloated-1819566872
candy purchase puts yet more money in raisinets' bloated coffers
1
https://local.theonion.com/dad-busy-throwing-seeds-or-something-on-lawn-1819574922
dad busy throwing seeds or something on lawn
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-associates-face-growing-concern-and-frustration-over-donald-jr-crisis_us_596571f4e4b005b0fdc98cb9
trump associates face growing concern and frustration over donald jr. crisis
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/spain-charges-catalan-leaders_us_59f73146e4b07fdc5fbf962a
spain's state prosecutor calls for charges against catalan leaders
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/snoop-dogg-democratic-convention_us_5787ff5de4b03fc3ee501af1
snoop dogg to perform at dnc, courtesy of big pharma
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/mysterious-defibrillator-saves-accident-victim-disappe-1819567784
mysterious defibrillator saves accident victim, disappears
1
https://www.theonion.com/area-man-suddenly-realizes-hes-the-one-whos-been-killin-1819571748
area man suddenly realizes he's the one who's been killing off world's bee population
1
https://local.theonion.com/friend-takes-liberty-of-ordering-40-worth-of-appetizer-1819576681
friend takes liberty of ordering $40 worth of appetizers for entire table
1
https://www.theonion.com/underwear-worn-out-of-respect-for-the-dead-1819587694
underwear worn out of respect for the dead
1
https://entertainment.theonion.com/last-weeks-trek-pretty-awesome-1819564105
last week's trek pretty awesome
1
https://www.theonion.com/report-17-new-species-of-bacteria-found-every-day-in-w-1819580409
report: 17 new species of bacteria found every day in world's rainforest cafés
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/cary-elwes-of-the-princess-bride-to-join-stranger-things-season-3_us_5ad7a140e4b029ebe0209029
cary elwes of 'the princess bride' to join 'stranger things' season 3
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/home-improvement-announces-plans-to-suck-more-1819563884
'home improvement' announces plans to suck more
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/may/31/north-korea-praises-trump-and-urges-us-voters-to-reject-dull-hillary
north korea praises trump and urges us voters to reject 'dull hillary'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-color-of-money-in-sil_n_5969722.html
the color of money in silicon valley
0
https://www.theonion.com/it-s-like-biggie-and-tupac-all-over-again-says-dumba-1819574666
'it's like biggie and tupac all over again,' says dumbass of korean conflict
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/thailand-mass-grave_n_7194824.html
more bodies found at mass grave in suspected thai trafficking camp
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://variety.com/2016/tv/news/stephen-colbert-late-show-chris-licht-cbs-late-night-1201752509/
inside cbs' bid to bolster 'late show with stephen colbert'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/3-lessons-i-learned-what-the-refugees-really-want_us_5749b115e4b0009f3d848c24
what refugees really want
0
https://politics.theonion.com/furloughed-willie-horton-pays-respects-at-george-h-w-b-1830878942
furloughed willie horton pays respects at george h.w. bush funeral
1
https://local.theonion.com/girl-has-just-enough-physical-flaws-to-maybe-take-man-s-1819571848
girl has just enough physical flaws to maybe take man seriously
1
https://politics.theonion.com/biden-opts-out-of-putting-last-few-felonies-on-job-appl-1819579536
biden opts out of putting last few felonies on job application
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mh370-debris-investigation_us_55bcbc31e4b06363d5a261ae
suspected mh370 debris arrives in france for investigation
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-do-kids-need-to-know-about-race_us_599d74cce4b02289f7619148
what do kids need to know about race?
0
https://local.theonion.com/nana-j-reclaims-top-spot-from-gram-gram-following-exce-1827832281
nana j. reclaims top spot from gram gram following exceptional birthday outing
1
https://local.theonion.com/mariachi-band-has-no-idea-your-mother-just-died-1819588230
mariachi band has no idea your mother just died
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-morning-email-trump-filing-cohen-stormy_us_5afd6647e4b06a3fb50e2838
trump filing shows he paid cohen, after cohen paid stormy
0
https://www.theonion.com/worlds-fattest-town-makes-consumes-worlds-largest-mozz-1819587909
world's fattest town makes, consumes world's largest mozzarella stick
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/star-spangled-banner-kid-video_us_598b34c5e4b0a66b8bb08410
2-year-old adorably mangles 'the star-spangled banner'
0
https://www.theonion.com/hundreds-of-cheap-generic-doorstops-flood-market-after-1819577973
hundreds of cheap, generic doorstops flood market after doorblocker patent runs out
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/turkey-referendum-erdogan-opposition-vote-annulment_us_58f4b223e4b0da2ff861ae42
opposition calls for turkish vote annulment after erdogan wins powers
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/paul-manafort-bail-phone-company-florida_us_5a047884e4b03deac08bc166
it sure seems like paul manafort is misleading a federal judge so he can winter in florida
0
https://politics.theonion.com/authorities-believe-man-radicalized-while-serving-18-ye-1819577741
authorities believe man radicalized while serving 18 years in congress
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/another-goper-has-compared-planned-parenthood-to-nazi-germany_us_58f4bcffe4b0b9e9848cf6f5
another goper has compared planned parenthood to nazi germany
0
https://politics.theonion.com/pence-tells-emotional-story-of-longtime-friend-who-was-1819579044
pence tells emotional story of longtime friend who was aborted after second trimester
1
https://www.theonion.com/genetically-modified-broccoli-shrieks-benefits-at-shopp-1819566345
genetically modified broccoli shrieks benefits at shopper
1
https://local.theonion.com/couple-duetting-suddenly-seymour-at-karaoke-bar-proba-1832461278
couple duetting 'suddenly seymour' at karaoke bar probably gonna fuck like animals after this
1
https://www.theonion.com/wow-dad-really-went-from-zero-to-60-with-woodworking-t-1819579068
wow, dad really went from zero to 60 with woodworking this summer
1
https://www.theonion.com/report-average-american-consumes-156-pounds-of-sugar-p-1819573863
report: average american consumes 156 pounds of sugar per year but would like to consume much more
1
https://politics.theonion.com/kennedy-curse-claims-life-of-77-year-old-tumor-riddled-1819589539
'kennedy curse' claims life of 77-year-old tumor-riddled binge-drinker
1
https://www.theonion.com/wedding-dj-finally-gets-the-chance-to-listen-to-some-bl-1819573695
wedding dj finally gets the chance to listen to some black eyed peas on his own time
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/amy-schumer-lafayette-shooting_us_55bced15e4b06363d5a268cd
amy schumer hints she will push to reduce gun violence
0
https://www.theonion.com/carhartt-introduces-rugged-work-thong-1819587919
carhartt introduces rugged work thong
1
https://www.theonion.com/report-you-live-in-an-embarrassing-country-1819575722
report: you live in an embarrassing country
1
https://local.theonion.com/family-lets-cars-come-inside-house-during-snowstorm-1819577405
family lets cars come inside house during snowstorm
1