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If there's anything we can do to make it up... | Call off the debt? |
Or, say, we could let you pass your driver's test. | Call off the debt? |
Uh... well... | Debt's off! Let's go, Marge. Woo hoo! |
No, Homer. | Woo hoo! |
No, Homer. | Mmmmm. |
This is horrible. People will start to avoid Springfield. | But what can I do? I'm just... one man. |
Hello, I'm Bart Simpson. In the past, I've brought you such classic films as "Homer in the Shower," and "Homer on the Toilet." And now, I give you... "The Eternal Struggle." | Relaxed fit, my Aunt Fanny! Stupid Dockers! Oh, the belt is buckled. |
I like him. He's smart, he's sensitive, he's clearly not obsessed with his physical appearance... | My ears are burning. |
Uh, I wasn't talking about you, Dad. | No, my ears are really burning. I wanted to see inside, so I lit a Q-tip. |
"You can stay with us, and enjoy the sights and sounds of the country." | Marge, is this a pimple or a boil? |
It's supposed to say Jay's name, not yours. | Oh, you're right. |
It's supposed to say Jay's name, not yours. | There ya... Just second... |
It's supposed to say Jay's name, not yours. | Oh, that should... |
Oh, nice to meet you, Marge. I saw your hair from the plane. And you must be the man who didn't know if he had a pimple or a boil. | It was a gummy bear. |
Uh oh. I smell another cheap cartoon crossover. | Bart Simpson, meet Jay Sherman, the Critic. |
Homer, the guest should get the last pork chop. | But, I'm still hungry. |
Thank you! | Yeah, well I won the belching contest at work. |
How droll. | Yeah, well Scooby Doo can doo-doo... but Jimmy Carter is smarter! |
Muh... muh... muh... | Whatcha doing, Marge? |
Making out the jury list for the film festival. Mayor Quimby -- Krusty -- Jay -- | Marge, do you respect my intelligence? |
Yes. | Okay! Wait a minute. Why did it take you so long to say yes? |
No reason. | Okay! Wait a minute. Are you humoring me? |
Yes. | Okay! Wait a minute. That's bad! Look, I know I'm not witty like that critic guy. But does he know all the words to the Oscar Mayer song? |
You don't have to do this. | Yeah, well you think I'm stupid. |
I don't think you're stupid. | Prove it. |
I don't think you're stupid. | Put me on that film jury festival thing. |
Next. | Exactly. Heh, heh. |
Oh boy, this is gonna get worse before it gets better. | Pull my finger. |
Hans Moleman Productions presents "Man Getting Hit By Football." | This contest is over. Give that man the ten thousand dollars! |
This isn't "America's Funniest Home Videos." | But ... The ball... His groin!... It works on so many levels! Roll it again. |
I think we have a winner. | What'd I miss? |
Two to two. Well, Homer, it all comes down to you. | Football in the groin. Football in the groin. |
Why don't we all take a five minute break? It'll clear our heads. | Good idea, Marge. My mind is going a mile a minute. |
How did you know my name? | I have every right to be on that jury even though I got there because I'm sleeping with the head of the festival. |
Well, Homer. | Marge, I've got some serious thinking to do. |
Well, Homer. | Hm. Barney's movie has heart. But football in the groin had a football in the groin. |
Don't cry for me. I'm already dead. | Wow. I'll never drink another beer. |
Beer here! | I'll take ten. |
Homie, you voted for the right movie. I'm glad you were on the jury. | Aw, you know something Marge, it's not that tough being a film cricket. |
Yon meat 'tis sweet as summer's wafting breeze. | Can I have some? |
Mine ears are open only to the pleas of those who speak ye old English. | Sweet maiden of the spit, grant now my boon, that I mightst sup on suckling pig this noon. |
Whatever. | I've eaten eight different meats. I'm a true Renaissance man. |
...except for the international market it's my... | Woo hoo! Oh, Marge, that's great news! |
Hey, hey there with the personal calls Simpson. | Oh, ah, but Mr. Milhouse, my little girl's getting married! |
Homer, don't take this personally, but I've obtained a court order to prevent you from planning this wedding. | Well, these seem to be in order. I'll be out back in the hammock. |
Oh Lisa! | Yo, Hugh. Here's a little bit of U.S. hospitality. What do you think of that? |
Now throw compost on it! | Whew! Uh, enjoy. |
Oh, still warm. | You can be the first to try out the new guest bedroom I built. Remember, if the building inspector comes by, it's not a room, it's a window box. |
Homer! Bart! Maggie! Company eating rules. | Oh, right. |
Anyway, Hugh, there's more to my life than just a wrecking ball. I also crush cars into cubes. And on the side, I promote local tough man contests. Basically I'm gettin' out all my aggression 'til I go to law school. | So, Hugh. Have you heard all the latest American jokes? Uh, here's a good one. Pull my finger. |
Yes, we have that one in England too, Mr. Simpson. | I said, pull my finger. |
Maggie! Don't talk with your mouth full. | Me and Bart'll take Hugh out on the town this afternoon. |
Hugh should take it easy because of his fall. | Great. There's only one thing I ask in return. |
Hugh should take it easy because of his fall. | So this driving on the left makes you feel more at home, huh Hugh? |
That's true. | Hugh, there's something I want you to have. My Dad gave me his cuff links to wear on the day I married Marge, and they brought us good luck. I couldn't imagine a happier marriage. We don't have many traditions in our family, but it'd mean a lot to me if you kept this one alive. |
You know, Fox turned into a hard-core sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice. | Marge, it's so great to have the whole family together under one roof. I never realized how much I missed it. Listen to the murmurs in the next room. The house is full of life again. |
You know, Fox turned into a hard-core sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice. | Keep it down in there! |
Well, here goes nothing. Mom, Dad, meet Homer Simpson. | Hey, how are you. Nice to meet ya. |
Well, here goes nothing. Mom, Dad, meet Homer Simpson. | You know what's great about you English? "Octopussy." Man, I must have seen that movie... twice. |
Hi, Dad. | You look great, sweetheart. |
Thanks. | Little Lisa. Lisa Simpson. You know, I always felt you were the best thing my name ever got attached to. Since the time you learned to pin your own diapers, you've been smarter than me. |
Hey, Dad. Did you forget to give those cufflinks to Hugh? | Aw, no... |
Well? | I found them on the night stand this morning. I guess they weren't his cup of tea. Don't worry about it. |
Hi, Dad. | I ate seven pounds of fudge! |
Wow! | The man at the stand said it was a record! |
Wow. What else did you do, Dad? | I rode the teacups! Then I got a little sick and I had to sit down. But then I rode 'em again! |
Who took all my test papers off the refrigerator and tore them up?! | Who spread garbage all over Flanders' yard before I got a chance to? |
Well, I'm sure these things didn't destroy themselves, now did they? | Did they?! |
Well, I'm sure these things didn't destroy themselves, now did they? | Hmm, I guess Bart's not to blame. He's lucky too, because it's spankin' season and I've got a hankerin' for some spankerin'. |
My strobe light! | My "Best of Ray Stevens featuring The Streak" album! So it was the dog that buried all our stuff! |
Yes, the dog... | Oh my God! He's got the precious cable TV cable! |
Hey! | Don't worry. We'll catch him, or run him over tryin'. |
Look, he's heading back to the greyhound racing track where we found him! | Don't worry. As soon as they find out he doesn't have any money, they'll throw him out. Believe me, I know. |
Oh, this place is so big. Do you think we should split up and look for them, Homie? Homie? | Two bucks to win on number eight... ...and have you seen my beloved dog? Gimme the ticket. |
And they're off! She's The Fastest jumps out to an insurmountable lead! | You're lucky you got looks, Marge. |
As they round the far turn, it's She's The Fastest, followed by Always Comes In Second and I'm Number Three... | Yes! Come on, you little horse! |
Aww... | Aw, so that's what's been wrong with the little fella. He misses casual sex. |
Look, it's twins! | Now it's two sets of twins. |
Oh, Homie, aren't they adorable? | Yes, we've waited many years, but the good Lord has finally blessed us with a real family. |
Look at Branford II! Isn't that cute? He thinks he's one of the Models, Inc. | Get that cat out of the way! |
Yeeesch! This house stinks! You're not just putting the new newspapers over the old ones, are you? | Do you have a better idea? |
Yeah, they ate all my socks! I have to wear Lisa's to school today! | How do you explain the culottes, boy? |
Well, I have to coordinate, don't I? | Your mother and I have been thinking about giving the puppies away. |
Nooooooo! | Mainly your mother. |
All right, we'll give the dogs one more chance. As long as the puppies don't do anything else wrong, they stay. On a completely unrelated topic, I'm having a very, very important dinner party tonight. | Splendid. Who's coming? |
...and I know the little fellas would love romping around my many acres, chasing my many cars, drinking from my many toilets... | Who wouldn't? |
She's right, Homer. There's something about his face I don't trust. | Uh, I'm sorry, Mr. Burns, but you can't have these dogs. Am I fired? |
My, he certainly took that well. | A little too well, if you ask me. I'm sure he's plotting some brilliant scheme to get those puppies. |
Check mate. | Lousy teachers. Trying to palm off our kids on us. |
Relax? I can't relax. Nor can I yield, relent, or... Only two synonyms? Oh my God! I'm losing my perspicacity! | Well, it's always in the last place you look. |
I'm worried about the kids, Homie. Lisa's becoming very obsessive. This morning I caught her trying to dissect her own rain coat. | I know. And this perpetual motion machine she made today is a joke. It just keeps going faster and faster. |
That's it. We have to get them back to school. | I'm with you, Marge. Lisa, get in here! In this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics. |
Exhausting. It took the children forty minutes to locate Canada on the map. | Marge, anyone can miss Canada... all tucked away down there. |
There's no way I'll get into an Ivy League school now. At this rate I probably won't even get into Vassar. | Well, I've had just about enough of your Vassar bashing young lady. |
Bart, you'll never get Krabappel and Skinner together again. They're like two positively charged ions. | Oh, this is wonderful! You're alive! |
Um, the guy who chopped up George Washington? | Really? Wow. |
Mom, I think he's serious. | Kids are so naïve. Lisa, when you get to be our age, you'll learn a few things, like when a sign says "Do Not Feed The Bears," man, you'd better not feed the bears. |
Mom, I think he's serious. | Now get to school, boy. |
Don't worry, son, you'll be fine. This boy's appendix is inflamed and about to burst, which will make it easier to find once I get in there . | Man, these are primo seats. I could really go for a hot dog. |
Hot dogs! Get your hot dogs here! | Woo hoo! |
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