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suicidewatch | krisabstract19 | 2019/10/06 | I really hope I don’t regret not killing myself. I hope we all do not. It’s weird, I wanted to kill myself ever since I was 14. I’m 20 now. Things have changed. Some for the worse, some for the better. I still want to kill myself while I’m young though. I know I won’t when I get older.
I haven’t purely because of fear... | -0.386852 | 1.56379 | 1.322469 | 101.611111 | 87.209877 | 4.093827 | 15.17284 | 5.033349 | -1.217175 | 569 | 10 | 143 | 2 | 18 | 184 | 89 | 162 | 0.172 | 0.671 | 0.157 | -0.5106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 19 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 28 | 33 | 7 | 4 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 22 | 8 | 14 | 23 | 5 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 12 | 80 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126876 | 0.05701 | 0.080549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123626 | 0 | 0 | 0.058908 | 0 | 0.064079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.447949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.374227 | 0 | 0.061965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055085 | 0 | 0.099561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.453095 | 0.245638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072231 | 0.115927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.338651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079806 | 0.120178 | 0.090043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074907 | 0 | 0.110777 | 0.089512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133007 | 0.178993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072608 |
suicidewatch | Laliving90 | 2019/10/06 | Life doesn’t get better I remember my first rejection when I was 15 from a girl I had a crush on for a year. 29 now and my depression and anxiety has made it hard for me to get my life in order. No one wants to date a loser with no directions. The girl of my dreams has rejected me. I tried to move on and the last 5 gir... | 1.094833 | 2.886845 | 3.1725 | 91.315833 | 80.625 | 6.766667 | 20.666667 | 7.793538 | 0.676217 | 584 | 16 | 134 | 10 | 15 | 198 | 97 | 160 | 0.206 | 0.715 | 0.079 | -0.9512 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 15 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 19 | 25 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 18 | 2 | 24 | 12 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 95 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111482 | 0 | 0.155618 | 0 | 0 | 0.161743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154085 | 0.17475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286643 | 0 | 0.103935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163825 | 0 | 0 | 0.194394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149072 | 0.206297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.387522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194373 | 0 | 0 | 0.141049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129913 | 0 | 0 | 0.117769 |
suicidewatch | NEONMAXLIGHT | 2019/10/06 | Suicide 'help' from my paremts I've been suicidal my whole life (i am 14 and its ok if you dont belive me) . A while ago, my parents saw some cuts on my wrist (those werent the first i had). We then have a 'talk' wich consists of them telling me 100 times why i should not hurt myself, then they get the genius ideea tha... | 4.716607 | 5.570222 | 4.75957 | 87.417979 | 69.44843 | 7.561016 | 26.525859 | 7.554174 | 1.205729 | 886 | 26 | 184 | 9 | 15 | 275 | 134 | 223 | 0.21 | 0.751 | 0.038 | -0.9927 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 23 | 1 | 5 | 10 | 1 | 5 | 8 | 4 | 1 | 9 | 1 | 27 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 37 | 38 | 17 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 16 | 3 | 38 | 1 | 20 | 15 | 3 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 29 | 6 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 130 | 48 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102342 | 0 | 0 | 0.103025 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101586 | 0.116342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09073 | 0.084438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109826 | 0 | 0.054556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093931 | 0 | 0.100643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105308 | 0.100233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067267 | 0.150997 | 0 | 0 | 0.220452 | 0 | 0 | 0.06882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103559 | 0 | 0 | 0.082116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.651504 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079788 | 0.347061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236425 | 0.057884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089575 | 0.11083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211553 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | gibran800 | 2019/10/06 | How does one get used to the feeling of loneliness? Loneliness has always shadowed me. Now it's getting unbearable. I know this sounds contradictory, maybe selfish, I'm not sure, but I never felt loved. This is burning me from the inside. I attempted suicide a few times for the past few months, but never really had the... | 2.177532 | 5.021522 | 3.350662 | 84.754565 | 86.012987 | 6.196883 | 24.583117 | 7.554174 | 1.646856 | 323 | 13 | 58 | 6 | 10 | 104 | 54 | 77 | 0.231 | 0.691 | 0.079 | -0.9215 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 15 | 19 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 6 | 3 | 7 | 16 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 41 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219482 | 0 | 0.208391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.34018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.334786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237404 | 0 | 0.204556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.374902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | _agarth | 2019/10/06 | Friday, 11th of October, 2019 That's when I'm going to do it, 5 fails, the end is now. I'm only sending this here because I want *SOMEOME* to know that I'm gone, I just hope everyone is happier | -0.632857 | 1.396376 | 2.576476 | 91.551857 | 89.47619 | 6.217143 | 22.685714 | 7.554174 | 1.117337 | 148 | 6 | 34 | 3 | 5 | 53 | 33 | 42 | 0.068 | 0.749 | 0.184 | 0.5859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 17 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.412648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.445187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.462743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheObsessiveFangirl1 | 2019/10/06 | Guys i need help... Give me reasons to live..ive already attepted suicide 3 times and have many cuts and scars, my friends are aware and my parents dont care, my father is emotionally abusive and my friends hate the fact that i like yaoi. Help me..? This is my only hope ❤ | 2.286667 | 4.32572 | 3.044222 | 92.473 | 77.888889 | 5.801481 | 27.466667 | 6.742158 | 1.084093 | 210 | 9 | 45 | 2 | 5 | 66 | 42 | 54 | 0.248 | 0.547 | 0.206 | -0.6031 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 22 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0.256438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.334432 | 0 | 0 | 0.207623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290142 | 0 | 0 | 0.214967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105738 | 0 | 0.191115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164607 | 0 | 0 | 0.240324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AwakeAsleepAliveDead | 2019/10/06 | I need a reason not to please I’m not going to explain my situation, I just need someone to tell me something good please. | 9.3448 | 5.829527 | 9.736 | 69.788 | 62.2 | 11.6 | 41 | 8.841846 | 3.669 | 97 | 4 | 19 | 1 | 1 | 33 | 18 | 25 | 0.158 | 0.725 | 0.117 | -0.0062 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161129 | 0.237801 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.420448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.622433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.291503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.318685 | 0 | 0 | 0.240223 | 0.218265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | loserburdenmisery | 2019/10/06 | I think I have something completely beyond depression And there is no cure for it. I'm not motivated to do anything. I really don't know what to do and surely I am insane now.
"The definition of insanity is repeating the same thing over and over and expecting a different result". I've done the same job for 15 years a... | 2.325 | 4.143249 | 5.003368 | 79.495579 | 76.982456 | 9.121404 | 26.312281 | 9.642633 | 2.647571 | 437 | 17 | 88 | 13 | 10 | 156 | 72 | 114 | 0.328 | 0.619 | 0.053 | -0.9843 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 23 | 19 | 9 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 12 | 17 | 4 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 62 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159644 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277041 | 0 | 0.274583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225562 | 0 | 0.271797 | 0.273616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173986 | 0.167806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168646 |
suicidewatch | lacedankles | 2019/10/06 | Oh fuck here we go I don’t know what the fuck to do. I’ve been really depressed for years and have been cutting myself for 2. I always cut really deep, often to fat and I’m scared eventually my body will give up and they’ll stop healing- but I’d also like them to stop healing in some weird way. I sometimes feel like I’... | 1.190936 | 2.687661 | 3.220753 | 92.454139 | 79.267559 | 6.205351 | 18.523411 | 7.010147 | 0.001211 | 1,071 | 21 | 250 | 12 | 26 | 363 | 161 | 299 | 0.224 | 0.58 | 0.196 | -0.5293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 32 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 21 | 30 | 9 | 2 | 11 | 1 | 20 | 19 | 5 | 1 | 5 | 46 | 51 | 25 | 2 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 18 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 17 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 33 | 13 | 29 | 40 | 6 | 40 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 14 | 15 | 3 | 6 | 23 | 147 | 41 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0.09284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104986 | 0.076081 | 0.079161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252422 | 0 | 0.105676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061355 | 0 | 0.245824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084263 | 0 | 0 | 0.062837 | 0.172113 | 0.080157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144312 | 0.067966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263857 | 0.149115 | 0.091264 | 0.108137 | 0 | 0.07609 | 0 | 0.104804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063768 | 0 | 0 | 0.094492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21051 | 0 | 0.052285 | 0.077549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067198 | 0.139437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080882 | 0.257594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064467 | 0.072356 | 0.101232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190325 | 0 | 0.243788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094093 | 0.212996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159077 | 0 | 0.099458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055475 | 0.218692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078498 | 0 | 0.15103 | 0.076313 | 0 | 0 | 0.088193 | 0 | 0 | 0.218805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067582 | 0 | 0 | 0.061265 |
suicidewatch | ventsad101 | 2019/10/06 | I feel like I'm becoming more suicidal as the days pass I'm not sure if this is the right place to post, but I don't know where else to post. I don't want to call a hotline or find other resources as I don't feel as if my life is at that point yet, but I've been dealing with thoughts of suicide for months at this point... | 1.46846 | 2.362548 | 3.113322 | 96.023238 | 77.210383 | 6.266823 | 22.087822 | 6.456674 | 0.11874 | 2,543 | 66 | 641 | 19 | 56 | 844 | 247 | 732 | 0.167 | 0.64 | 0.192 | 0.98 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 63 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 44 | 55 | 3 | 7 | 34 | 0 | 64 | 21 | 2 | 7 | 6 | 152 | 151 | 67 | 5 | 19 | 39 | 0 | 21 | 12 | 1 | 8 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 39 | 30 | 0 | 4 | 48 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 28 | 19 | 1 | 5 | 11 | 22 | 96 | 36 | 74 | 123 | 10 | 76 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 5 | 22 | 35 | 3 | 15 | 40 | 417 | 135 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04422 | 0 | 0.095282 | 0.125466 | 0 | 0 | 0.034703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039621 | 0.032427 | 0 | 0.051414 | 0.046574 | 0 | 0 | 0.044255 | 0.037296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043061 | 0 | 0.085991 | 0 | 0 | 0.072652 | 0 | 0 | 0.047298 | 0.03367 | 0 | 0 | 0.054393 | 0.043476 | 0.108964 | 0 | 0.087533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.036904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035228 | 0 | 0.037351 | 0 | 0 | 0.194973 | 0 | 0.035531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.426455 | 0.27114 | 0.04049 | 0 | 0.077086 | 0.03587 | 0 | 0 | 0.032581 | 0.038986 | 0.066097 | 0.080908 | 0.095866 | 0.106112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047605 | 0 | 0 | 0.083696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162231 | 0 | 0 | 0.044653 | 0 | 0 | 0.208504 | 0.247229 | 0.042266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152242 | 0 | 0.056298 | 0 | 0 | 0.045936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03366 | 0 | 0.031 | 0 | 0.065049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.041318 | 0.040464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057152 | 0.064145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091333 | 0 | 0.029236 | 0 | 0.088119 | 0 | 0.119595 | 0 | 0.080776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.043358 | 0 | 0.090551 | 0.047771 | 0.10804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085358 | 0.033605 | 0.038391 | 0 | 0 | 0.086575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044948 | 0.033678 | 0.035257 | 0.241531 | 0 | 0 | 0.092256 | 0 | 0.039745 | 0 | 0.031707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048963 | 0.168098 | 0.054042 | 0 | 0.26783 | 0.04918 | 0.145407 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.036422 | 0 | 0.034795 | 0.174113 | 0.066946 | 0 | 0 | 0.037916 | 0 | 0.076105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091464 | 0.122803 | 0 | 0 | 0.119827 | 0 | 0 | 0.054313 |
suicidewatch | j0wn3z | 2019/10/06 | Maybe I fail in the world because I am not of the world. What you think? Well screw me because I have philosophical reasons. Spiritual understanding makes me see who I am. These are discerned spiritually by intuition and a dose of good perception that lets you see the state of truth. Man is not of the world, therefore ... | 4.957412 | 6.631117 | 5.035013 | 82.58718 | 69.674603 | 8.003676 | 27.152047 | 8.532817 | 1.841132 | 1,057 | 35 | 201 | 17 | 19 | 330 | 148 | 252 | 0.072 | 0.859 | 0.069 | 0.0757 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 32 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 10 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 0 | 18 | 6 | 4 | 9 | 3 | 42 | 34 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 21 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 18 | 7 | 36 | 24 | 3 | 32 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 13 | 17 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 134 | 39 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070846 | 0 | 0 | 0.113736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.277324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12831 | 0.271546 | 0 | 0.13623 | 0.14771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278843 | 0 | 0.145586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090088 | 0.086888 | 0 | 0.107653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092065 | 0 | 0 | 0.141166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.294109 | 0.09872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheSupremeDouchebag | 2019/10/06 | I think my relationship and my inability to stand up for myself to people have ruined my life and I just want it all to be over. I am in my early 20s soon to be mid 20s and as my mom told me yesterday I don’t have much to show for efforts in school besides political science degree and a lot of debt from a failed stint ... | 4.166605 | 5.106602 | 5.352915 | 82.346877 | 70.771689 | 8.137587 | 28.380497 | 8.412273 | 1.90874 | 4,276 | 153 | 866 | 65 | 76 | 1,422 | 386 | 1,095 | 0.145 | 0.741 | 0.114 | -0.9886 | 10 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 60 | 1 | 1 | 17 | 8 | 41 | 50 | 5 | 4 | 37 | 0 | 82 | 6 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 182 | 177 | 77 | 2 | 25 | 46 | 12 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 4 | 5 | 8 | 57 | 60 | 0 | 4 | 28 | 6 | 8 | 20 | 32 | 22 | 1 | 1 | 41 | 14 | 168 | 28 | 149 | 111 | 27 | 129 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 81 | 51 | 0 | 25 | 56 | 633 | 225 | 23 | 0.121373 | 0 | 0.039481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035863 | 0 | 0.040513 | 0.041902 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037823 | 0 | 0.038011 | 0.124438 | 0.033781 | 0.221964 | 0.044682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082624 | 0.092546 | 0.041249 | 0 | 0 | 0.069701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032302 | 0 | 0 | 0.052184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.033797 | 0 | 0.179168 | 0.041804 | 0 | 0.053444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039575 | 0.03814 | 0 | 0.06137 | 0.028903 | 0.077692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105687 | 0.038811 | 0.183944 | 0 | 0.064715 | 0.044605 | 0.044569 | 0 | 0.035777 | 0 | 0.036242 | 0 | 0 | 0.129014 | 0.045599 | 0 | 0.054236 | 0 | 0.121747 | 0.040184 | 0 | 0 | 0.043311 | 0.045672 | 0 | 0 | 0.040148 | 0.035961 | 0 | 0 | 0.177876 | 0.098935 | 0 | 0 | 0.043957 | 0.082742 | 0.085729 | 0.118594 | 0 | 0.035725 | 0.035804 | 0.067949 | 0 | 0 | 0.034396 | 0 | 0 | 0.054012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163087 | 0.085839 | 0 | 0.047384 | 0.129172 | 0.043 | 0.148705 | 0.119996 | 0.031203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03882 | 0 | 0 | 0.043086 | 0.027415 | 0.09231 | 0 | 0 | 0.179694 | 0.131435 | 0 | 0.056097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038246 | 0 | 0 | 0.04116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217182 | 0 | 0 | 0.038485 | 0 | 0 | 0.327563 | 0.03224 | 0.184156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100401 | 0.045476 | 0 | 0 | 0.068559 | 0.031146 | 0 | 0 | 0.114545 | 0 | 0.129238 | 0.067649 | 0 | 0.126886 | 0 | 0.088508 | 0.229555 | 0 | 0 | 0.091258 | 0 | 0.035362 | 0 | 0.046267 | 0.093949 | 0.053757 | 0.077771 | 0 | 0.032119 | 0.047182 | 0 | 0 | 0.154636 | 0.04495 | 0.109873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143178 | 0.160567 | 0 | 0 | 0.036376 | 0.037505 | 0.036507 | 0 | 0 | 0.155999 | 0 | 0.058907 | 0 | 0.04123 | 0.08622 | 0 | 0 | 0.07816 |
suicidewatch | 1v1mebruh_ | 2019/10/06 | She might do it I know this girl who has been talking about killing herself for a while. My friend is currently freaking the fuck out cause she said she’ll probably do it today. We’ve though about talking to her parents (we’re in high school) but the problem is that they may not do anything as there have been similar s... | 4.577063 | 6.374527 | 4.989855 | 82.046425 | 70.826087 | 8.241546 | 29.299517 | 8.841846 | 2.331097 | 479 | 19 | 91 | 9 | 9 | 152 | 78 | 115 | 0.069 | 0.767 | 0.164 | 0.9329 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 13 | 20 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 12 | 3 | 16 | 13 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 21 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 68 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122332 | 0 | 0.287945 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153104 | 0.179039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270339 | 0.161742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234536 | 0.184849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193561 | 0 | 0.09615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185599 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194266 | 0 | 0.167014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18863 | 0.167408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166422 | 0 | 0 | 0.177063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.393312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281243 | 0.152918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | c3448665_urhen | 2019/10/06 | Gonna drink me in a coma. The title says it all. Nothing more. Nothing less.
I hope I could maybe find a new friend in that bar. Let's hope. | -2.741505 | -1.422077 | -0.252419 | 106.074704 | 112.870968 | 2.066667 | 11.61828 | 3.1291 | -2.022424 | 106 | 2 | 27 | 0 | 6 | 35 | 26 | 31 | 0.163 | 0.731 | 0.106 | -0.1793 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 15 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.525702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.507866 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | _isaacc_ | 2019/10/06 | I can't take it anymore Am a trans dude, closeted to almost everyone
I'm so tired of not being able to be myself. Every time I look in the mirror I see a girl looking back at me. This is so wrong
I can't come out to anyone. I would never be accepted
I feel so trapped
I'm living a fake life
I'll better die than l... | -0.652435 | 1.055597 | 2.722192 | 92.689002 | 86.272727 | 5.408442 | 18.715909 | 6.627428 | 0.0343 | 261 | 7 | 62 | 3 | 8 | 95 | 56 | 77 | 0.259 | 0.704 | 0.037 | -0.9541 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 17 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 2 | 9 | 13 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 38 | 10 | 0 | 0.218954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219251 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217144 | 0.153098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18861 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184478 | 0.20922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154654 | 0 | 0 | 0.386681 | 0 | 0.367733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127674 | 0.251656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155539 | 0.239392 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | PlusCare9 | 2019/10/06 | Oh boy, it's one of these nights I'm getting drunk as shit and I'm having a bit of a moment. To give a short background on me: 21, male, currently trainee in some boring-ass office job, no real traumas or anything of the sort.
I don't know what it is about me that makes me so miserable. Often I don't feel anything at ... | 3.639087 | 5.310999 | 4.487362 | 85.213667 | 73.015957 | 7.247376 | 30.61844 | 7.908726 | 2.098765 | 1,501 | 68 | 293 | 21 | 30 | 484 | 176 | 376 | 0.19 | 0.71 | 0.101 | -0.9908 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 59 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 24 | 19 | 7 | 4 | 14 | 1 | 24 | 14 | 4 | 2 | 7 | 74 | 72 | 25 | 2 | 10 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 19 | 13 | 5 | 2 | 16 | 8 | 0 | 6 | 10 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 35 | 6 | 38 | 61 | 13 | 42 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 15 | 6 | 19 | 19 | 187 | 54 | 3 | 0.079683 | 0 | 0.077759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090019 | 0.079024 | 0 | 0 | 0.32786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061271 | 0 | 0.048574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086993 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081242 | 0 | 0 | 0.06864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.358529 | 0 | 0 | 0.088867 | 0.210519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.368327 | 0.208154 | 0.076439 | 0.090571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079073 | 0.141651 | 0 | 0.082977 | 0.218957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058576 | 0.059084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149553 | 0 | 0.229373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076314 | 0.081066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090696 | 0.051047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07254 | 0 | 0 | 0.081793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184031 | 0.078808 | 0 | 0 | 0.084931 | 0.063635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102115 | 0 | 0.189777 | 0.092927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093998 | 0.063248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091631 | 0 | 0 | 0.11602 | 0 | 0 | 0.056604 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | dthrowaway456 | 2019/10/06 | Why isn't it like every time ? Usually when I cut myself too deep, it makes me stop for a bit. But this time, it's been only a day and I already want to cut myself really badly. I want to end it all. I'm lost and hopeless. :( | -1.437733 | 0.405022 | 2.056 | 95.164667 | 91.4 | 4.933333 | 14.333333 | 6.427356 | -0.610867 | 168 | 3 | 41 | 2 | 6 | 61 | 37 | 50 | 0.361 | 0.592 | 0.047 | -0.9477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 24 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230513 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301323 | 0 | 0.322743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | LIL_GOBi | 2019/10/06 | My parents found out. So for context i'm a 14/o boy. freshman.
So for context i's a 14/o boy. freshman. al.. ive tried cutting, ive only used ends of broken pencils kuz they dont leave scars, but still work......and ive been talking a lot to my best friend (also my ex)…...and last night my step dad went through my ph... | -1.322911 | 0.624092 | 1.083405 | 101.365867 | 92.670886 | 4.172658 | 17.1827 | 5.683918 | -0.716356 | 813 | 22 | 207 | 6 | 30 | 273 | 123 | 237 | 0.153 | 0.682 | 0.166 | 0.7441 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 90 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 15 | 20 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 18 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 31 | 34 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 4 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 27 | 10 | 24 | 25 | 7 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 28 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 108 | 36 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102546 | 0 | 0.079179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082711 | 0 | 0.087694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250315 | 0.282934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10856 | 0.305983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.427795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080707 | 0 | 0.104838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193487 | 0.099235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110768 | 0 | 0.084176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231921 | 0 | 0 | 0.072784 | 0.073415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210887 | 0 | 0.075302 | 0 | 0 | 0.10994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094182 | 0.157475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110005 | 0.134444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072081 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lifeisfuckingcrazy | 2019/10/06 | I wish the car crash would have killed me I was involved in a crash the other night due to a drunk driver. Airbags deployed, EMS called, the whole deal. Somehow no one got hurt.
I didn’t see my life flash before my eyes. I didn’t think “I still have so much to do”. I didn’t think about how lucky I got.
The on... | 0.531035 | 2.472915 | 1.67798 | 100.519545 | 83.351852 | 3.927273 | 15.373737 | 3.1291 | -1.328678 | 391 | 6 | 93 | 0 | 11 | 123 | 66 | 108 | 0.249 | 0.64 | 0.111 | -0.9531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 13 | 21 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 14 | 2 | 9 | 11 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 59 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113086 | 0 | 0.157856 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191253 | 0 | 0 | 0.192531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.41048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125707 | 0.141089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.381472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207116 | 0.213328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131781 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | briannamator | 2019/10/06 | Too tired to handle this Life is way too much. Broke up with my boyfriend yesterday so he doesn't have to deal with this. I have no one to talk to because I don't want to be any more of a burden than I have already been. I have no more energy, I give up. | 1.808158 | 2.238175 | 3.42364 | 95.897566 | 75.842105 | 7.103509 | 21.267544 | 7.168622 | 0.170933 | 195 | 4 | 51 | 2 | 4 | 65 | 39 | 57 | 0.246 | 0.713 | 0.041 | -0.8781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 11 | 9 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 38 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378988 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.329453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.394727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202566 | 0.272602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ElonTheSexGod | 2019/10/06 | Suicide methods please I have tried killing myself multiple times over the years but I never took the final step due to the pain; are there any not very painful methods to commit suicide using home items. I can’t buy any chemicals since I’m 14. | 6.145248 | 6.955979 | 5.58383 | 82.933333 | 66.234043 | 7.968794 | 32.687943 | 7.793538 | 2.27085 | 197 | 8 | 36 | 2 | 3 | 60 | 38 | 47 | 0.274 | 0.593 | 0.134 | -0.8825 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 18 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.464888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.477894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127379 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242704 | 0.148312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188669 | 0 | 0.180243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140673 |
suicidewatch | gokukrillin9000000 | 2019/10/06 | I feel empty and everything is pointless I have always been a sick kid, the entirety of my life. Have had epilepsy, migraine for 9 years, one ankle sprained 11 times, one shoulder dislocated 5 times and then operated on. Constant problems with vertigo, epilepsy and about 4 years into severe depression and anxiety.
Fe... | 4.925175 | 7.406203 | 5.685827 | 74.526368 | 71.515723 | 8.568014 | 31.482929 | 9.236283 | 3.298568 | 698 | 32 | 111 | 16 | 14 | 227 | 112 | 159 | 0.263 | 0.696 | 0.041 | -0.9875 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 16 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 24 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 3 | 12 | 4 | 16 | 13 | 2 | 25 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 74 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115993 | 0 | 0.150372 | 0 | 0 | 0.124775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116591 | 0.253202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097786 | 0 | 0.130595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137154 | 0 | 0 | 0.272543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140175 | 0 | 0 | 0.086172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164742 | 0 | 0.321293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171294 | 0 | 0 | 0.170434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265242 | 0.348543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13633 | 0.140559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107711 | 0 | 0 | 0.195284 |
suicidewatch | FrustratedGuyWithaQ | 2019/10/06 | I (23m) give myself two years. Last night I sat in my dingy dorm with familiar questions overwhelming me. Why did I never have friends? Did I hurt people or drive them away? What's the point, if any, of my temporary existence? Why do my brother and parents no longer talk to me? Do I enjoy engineering or did I do it for... | 0.346643 | 2.468134 | 2.006187 | 96.786639 | 85.538462 | 4.771237 | 18.658863 | 6.046908 | -0.308844 | 762 | 20 | 175 | 6 | 23 | 248 | 128 | 208 | 0.158 | 0.778 | 0.063 | -0.9589 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 12 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 22 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 28 | 37 | 13 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 2 | 27 | 4 | 19 | 24 | 5 | 23 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 7 | 10 | 112 | 37 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100377 | 0 | 0 | 0.082035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093202 | 0 | 0.063026 | 0.231446 | 0 | 0.101182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119101 | 0.123805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066297 | 0.098333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255622 | 0 | 0 | 0.106522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161048 | 0.122304 | 0.242386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08868 | 0 | 0.186081 | 0 | 0 | 0.113207 | 0.118196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081745 | 0.091748 | 0 | 0 | 0.13395 | 0 | 0 | 0.083632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11543 | 0 | 0 | 0.135138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081903 | 0 | 0.235684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.544267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155369 |
suicidewatch | FakeMarvelFan | 2019/10/06 | I need someone to talk to Hey, I’m not really sure what to put here but my boyfriend just broke up with me and I’d like someone to talk to to distract myself from the guilt I’m feeling. Sorry if this is the wrong place to post this, but I’m feeling very lost atm. Tried to talk about it with my mom but she’s just judgin... | -0.314167 | 1.654528 | 1.358889 | 101.35 | 87.055556 | 4.155556 | 18.722222 | 5.148861 | -0.701728 | 254 | 7 | 63 | 1 | 8 | 82 | 47 | 72 | 0.239 | 0.679 | 0.082 | -0.9182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 2 | 13 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 36 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.370066 | 0 | 0 | 0.244459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205821 | 0 | 0 | 0.526578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238765 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | sadthrowaway9380 | 2019/10/06 | I think I'm going to kill myself tonight. I have nothing. I want to die, but I have been too much of a fucking coward to do it. I'm too scared to tell anyone. I was being seen at my universities counseling center but they cut me loose because they wanted me to do IOP and I couldn't afford it. I just want to fucking die... | 2.154141 | 3.339959 | 3.875438 | 90.075813 | 75.953125 | 6.37 | 22.175 | 6.742158 | 0.42891 | 467 | 12 | 104 | 4 | 10 | 157 | 83 | 128 | 0.157 | 0.656 | 0.187 | 0.8147 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 18 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 31 | 9 | 3 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 17 | 4 | 17 | 20 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 75 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.383868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.34194 | 0.096621 | 0 | 0.210207 | 0.155115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176542 | 0.128211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118499 | 0 | 0 | 0.107838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.32724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238185 |
suicidewatch | hardtodealwith | 2019/10/06 | I’m unhappy with myself I’m still young, only just a freshman but I don’t want to live. And it’s my fault. I want to please everyone but in the end, I’m just seen as a loser.
My expressions don’t match my emotions, when I have a neutral face, I look angry. I want to smile but my family and friend tell me that my smil... | 1.759011 | 3.353075 | 3.455369 | 90.965657 | 77.932584 | 6.516137 | 22.095587 | 7.340592 | 0.643764 | 1,971 | 56 | 439 | 25 | 46 | 657 | 230 | 534 | 0.163 | 0.65 | 0.186 | 0.8544 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 53 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 8 | 23 | 26 | 1 | 1 | 23 | 1 | 44 | 13 | 6 | 5 | 4 | 68 | 86 | 36 | 2 | 11 | 22 | 2 | 4 | 8 | 5 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 21 | 17 | 2 | 4 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 16 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 13 | 75 | 18 | 65 | 79 | 9 | 57 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 27 | 21 | 0 | 9 | 30 | 293 | 96 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053762 | 0 | 0.255725 | 0.154436 | 0.059494 | 0 | 0 | 0.123672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060227 | 0 | 0.075556 | 0 | 0 | 0.077362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06022 | 0 | 0.072563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058407 | 0.078647 | 0.061926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133618 | 0.062837 | 0 | 0.131823 | 0 | 0.141409 | 0.149846 | 0 | 0.076591 | 0.127806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270089 | 0 | 0.146115 | 0 | 0.158942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148154 | 0.273264 | 0 | 0.061738 | 0.061874 | 0.352277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063103 | 0 | 0.04667 | 0 | 0.070241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102794 | 0 | 0.053924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142133 | 0.159525 | 0 | 0 | 0.077635 | 0 | 0 | 0.048472 | 0 | 0 | 0.153496 | 0.066094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059709 | 0 | 0.111202 | 0 | 0.14152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074522 | 0.111672 | 0.058454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105138 | 0 | 0.122221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139349 | 0.0896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080359 | 0 | 0.066809 | 0 | 0.142407 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164956 | 0.166491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0509 | 0.071004 | 0.071252 | 0.049667 | 0 | 0 | 0.045024 |
suicidewatch | 999999999876 | 2019/10/06 | I’m genuinely terrified I’m going to hurt myself It’s a constant battle in my head and it really scares me. I don’t want to die but I’m scared I will. | -1.916 | -0.036065 | 2.311429 | 90.958571 | 97.857143 | 6.228571 | 15.571429 | 7.554174 | 0.449686 | 119 | 3 | 28 | 3 | 5 | 45 | 27 | 35 | 0.409 | 0.559 | 0.032 | -0.9099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.336104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.332362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.346687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.648458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Rghfk | 2019/10/06 | I've been hitting myself over and over again The past few days I've felt the strong urge to kill myself. Tonight was my twentieth birthday, I drank quite a bit because I wanted to make sure I didn't feel like shit but drinking also makes me feel like shit I've been crying and planning my death for the past few hours I'... | 5.358255 | 4.850559 | 5.480888 | 87.530428 | 67.878505 | 7.880997 | 28.113707 | 6.427356 | 1.081874 | 406 | 11 | 89 | 2 | 6 | 128 | 61 | 107 | 0.328 | 0.586 | 0.086 | -0.9886 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 13 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 17 | 21 | 9 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 14 | 4 | 9 | 12 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 50 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175938 | 0 | 0.135848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186599 | 0.109555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25768 | 0.242716 | 0.163106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167292 | 0 | 0.181854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.375881 | 0 | 0.093358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.348747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Curticorn | 2019/10/06 | I'm maybe two steps apart from actually killing myself. Pls help I have nobody to talk to. I feel kinda stupid writing this but I have no idea what to do. I'm done, I can't anymore.
I'm going to have only 2 hours at home between working and sleeping, in those two hours I'm supposed to be a housewife, to entertain a dog... | 0.799181 | 3.054303 | 2.642339 | 92.079811 | 84.793991 | 4.786332 | 20.120337 | 6.093298 | 0.069678 | 878 | 26 | 184 | 7 | 26 | 291 | 127 | 233 | 0.168 | 0.631 | 0.202 | 0.8898 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 30 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 12 | 18 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 21 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 36 | 44 | 16 | 2 | 4 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 3 | 22 | 12 | 30 | 33 | 4 | 23 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 6 | 2 | 4 | 9 | 125 | 34 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0.102096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087054 | 0 | 0 | 0.071147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109795 | 0.27759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106831 | 0 | 0.106669 | 0 | 0.110677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080831 | 0 | 0.054661 | 0 | 0.356756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070126 | 0 | 0.104945 | 0.207827 | 0.206064 | 0 | 0 | 0.118106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11078 | 0 | 0 | 0.443387 | 0.051113 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098996 | 0 | 0 | 0.105107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15914 | 0 | 0 | 0.116171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0832 | 0 | 0.105883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117116 | 0 | 0 | 0.250655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Jutsuma | 2019/10/06 | I seek help, but won't get it in time Hi,
I am 19m and am in kind of a bad situation.
I have mental problems (diagnoses were depression, dissociative amnesia, ADHD and highly functioning autism) but no documented proof (they didn't want to brand me).
I look for help but started too late. At this point I have basically... | 3.724499 | 4.957586 | 5.268798 | 81.431849 | 72.114754 | 9.02878 | 25.030965 | 9.444779 | 1.9978 | 476 | 14 | 98 | 11 | 9 | 161 | 84 | 122 | 0.204 | 0.656 | 0.14 | -0.8701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 14 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 23 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 14 | 4 | 12 | 18 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 60 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14781 | 0.107914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152473 | 0.179678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188171 | 0 | 0 | 0.355972 | 0.187038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184346 | 0 | 0.1443 | 0.199694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086486 | 0 | 0.156318 | 0 | 0.148658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.356802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181715 | 0 | 0.198985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113431 | 0 | 0 | 0.206451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Jehsmooth_TK | 2019/10/06 | I failed at suicide again... I can't kill myself successfully I tried pills, cutting myself and it never works. Why is it so difficult to do something so simple, I just want to die. I wish I had a gun that would make this process so simple | 1.62125 | 3.90161 | 3.149833 | 89.5785 | 81.5 | 5.506667 | 22.1 | 6.742158 | 0.56887 | 186 | 6 | 38 | 2 | 5 | 61 | 37 | 48 | 0.361 | 0.504 | 0.135 | -0.9256 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 8 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 28 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.343838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.366535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.362389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298947 | 0 | 0.380979 | 0 | 0 | 0.241191 | 0 | 0 | 0.235346 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | mycupofteaorno | 2019/10/06 | I need a hug I don't know what else to say. I need a hug. A few seconds of closeness and warmth. I'm only human. | -3.401667 | -1.891235 | 0.590648 | 102.850417 | 102.333333 | 2.7 | 14.157407 | 3.1291 | -1.571215 | 84 | 2 | 23 | 0 | 4 | 31 | 20 | 27 | 0 | 0.635 | 0.365 | 0.8481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.397799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.706184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.362167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MehFuckitall | 2019/10/06 | I can't do this anymore What's the point in living anymore, I'm hurting everyday just being alive, I've tried keeping my head up, I've said "everything's going to get better" to myself over 1000 times, I'm tired of forcing a smile on my face everyday. I want to be happy, I really do, why can't I be happy anymore!? I co... | 1.959539 | 3.17133 | 4.037149 | 88.616447 | 76.5 | 7.052632 | 24.714912 | 7.66913 | 1.142083 | 870 | 29 | 193 | 12 | 19 | 299 | 118 | 240 | 0.149 | 0.616 | 0.235 | 0.9657 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 31 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 20 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 23 | 10 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 30 | 53 | 9 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 28 | 12 | 23 | 45 | 7 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 115 | 42 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102904 | 0 | 0 | 0.389297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205975 | 0.086793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078353 | 0 | 0 | 0.126579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093773 | 0.176396 | 0 | 0.092514 | 0 | 0.099241 | 0.070108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075819 | 0.090725 | 0.051272 | 0 | 0.167318 | 0 | 0 | 0.324585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208935 | 0 | 0.096889 | 0.100716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087228 | 0 | 0 | 0.053933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138632 | 0.095888 | 0 | 0.259967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083431 | 0.088571 | 0 | 0.065506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066499 | 0 | 0.104423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102531 | 0 | 0.09277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125737 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073786 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077909 | 0.057224 | 0.112793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177104 | 0 | 0 | 0.094599 | 0 | 0 | 0.099662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063196 |
suicidewatch | xrebxbiex | 2019/10/06 | Not sure what to do... I'm sort of running out of clear thinking. Recently I was hit with a large bill, much larger than I could ever hope to pay. And it's sort of the result of an accident from a friend trying to help me out, but it backfired and I now owe a ton of money. I honestly can't afford this right now. I don'... | 4.078828 | 4.562847 | 5.215475 | 84.910701 | 70.692308 | 8.579186 | 26.447964 | 8.671278 | 1.665869 | 986 | 29 | 211 | 16 | 17 | 327 | 140 | 260 | 0.135 | 0.696 | 0.17 | 0.8395 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 36 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 20 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 47 | 44 | 16 | 0 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 10 | 6 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 19 | 12 | 37 | 36 | 6 | 27 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 15 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 140 | 33 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.111503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130685 | 0.116497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.393654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101202 | 0 | 0 | 0.075469 | 0.103356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107716 | 0 | 0.115548 | 0.163257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176557 | 0 | 0.119394 | 0 | 0.194813 | 0.095837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153174 | 0 | 0 | 0.113488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080706 | 0.111645 | 0.11452 | 0.100895 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076271 | 0 | 0.114791 | 0.124464 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091203 | 0 | 0.083996 | 0.084724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108014 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11282 | 0 | 0 | 0.097579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129663 | 0.10769 | 0 | 0.085911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.310305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.377112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BRTD_Double0Donut | 2019/10/06 | My time is nearly up, so is my family's We have put up with so much shit over the years, but I have had to out up with the most so far.
Let's start from the beginning; Im born, soon after my mother has a dormant genetic disease activate inside called 'Antiphospholipid Syndrome'. Then a doctor runs a full checkup on m... | 5.435966 | 5.757133 | 5.809425 | 82.414274 | 67.669396 | 8.601358 | 30.203497 | 8.395992 | 2.085925 | 3,884 | 136 | 770 | 51 | 60 | 1,246 | 393 | 977 | 0.14 | 0.811 | 0.049 | -0.9986 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 76 | 4 | 3 | 12 | 7 | 22 | 19 | 4 | 3 | 71 | 0 | 90 | 35 | 14 | 5 | 7 | 121 | 134 | 60 | 5 | 20 | 19 | 19 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 18 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 39 | 54 | 3 | 5 | 8 | 4 | 1 | 27 | 12 | 13 | 1 | 15 | 44 | 10 | 103 | 6 | 117 | 67 | 27 | 184 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 77 | 60 | 4 | 15 | 93 | 535 | 142 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04134 | 0 | 0.045558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04329 | 0.031582 | 0 | 0.040942 | 0 | 0 | 0.033973 | 0.036751 | 0 | 0 | 0.116362 | 0 | 0.03447 | 0.20133 | 0 | 0.105388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092173 | 0.084311 | 0.094435 | 0 | 0.04241 | 0 | 0.142249 | 0 | 0.044613 | 0 | 0.098885 | 0 | 0.090697 | 0.266246 | 0 | 0.035558 | 0.041902 | 0.085692 | 0 | 0 | 0.211279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.036565 | 0 | 0 | 0.027268 | 0 | 0.034783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045224 | 0.113198 | 0.105348 | 0 | 0.045266 | 0 | 0 | 0.043138 | 0.039603 | 0.09385 | 0.034627 | 0.066037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073014 | 0 | 0.036982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124233 | 0 | 0.121969 | 0.047636 | 0 | 0 | 0.222968 | 0 | 0 | 0.036695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044855 | 0.042215 | 0 | 0 | 0.041377 | 0.036454 | 0 | 0.034668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039064 | 0.055115 | 0.041855 | 0 | 0.04497 | 0 | 0.083178 | 0 | 0 | 0.041685 | 0.048351 | 0.032952 | 0 | 0.030348 | 0 | 0.063681 | 0.079744 | 0 | 0.038742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259922 | 0.043966 | 0.27975 | 0.062796 | 0.043929 | 0 | 0.137522 | 0.089413 | 0.03941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.026447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.03927 | 0.032831 | 0 | 0.083563 | 0.032898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.031782 | 0 | 0 | 0.058442 | 0.176012 | 0.032969 | 0.06903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090316 | 0 | 0 | 0.04291 | 0.062081 | 0 | 0.072168 | 0.038009 | 0 | 0 | 0.054854 | 0 | 0 | 0.032775 | 0.16851 | 0 | 0 | 0.078897 | 0.045868 | 0.112116 | 0 | 0.080657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066231 | 0 | 0.037119 | 0.076541 | 0.037252 | 0 | 0.047474 | 0.079592 | 0 | 0.030055 | 0 | 0 | 0.293268 | 0 | 0 | 0.319025 |
suicidewatch | ivan0x32 | 2019/10/06 | I don't know what I'll do on my birthday Hopefully those fucking people around me won't have the audacity to visit me. Because fuck that. I can barely keep a straight face on a regular day.
Ha ha, no I'm completely fine - I just contemplate viable way of suicide every day. Not that I consider this as something that ba... | 2.802955 | 4.895214 | 4.200909 | 84.536364 | 76.5 | 7.309091 | 27.363636 | 8.238736 | 1.996745 | 875 | 36 | 168 | 16 | 20 | 289 | 130 | 220 | 0.207 | 0.681 | 0.111 | -0.9801 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 23 | 7 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 19 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 29 | 43 | 10 | 1 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 14 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 15 | 12 | 20 | 32 | 7 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 107 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071736 | 0 | 0 | 0.09133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085662 | 0.06254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225389 | 0.132329 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135524 | 0 | 0.08644 | 0 | 0.092205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079264 | 0.663924 | 0.053601 | 0 | 0 | 0.086051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09119 | 0 | 0 | 0.056383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071126 | 0.089581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173855 | 0.157963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065738 | 0 | 0.081448 | 0 | 0.117916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060512 | 0.244303 | 0 | 0 | 0.092244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145759 | 0.11217 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | lonelylesbiemon | 2019/10/06 | i guess i just need advice and to know if this was an attempt. i’m not even sure what’s real anymore i am so lost right now. i think i attempted last night? i had the sleeping pills, i was trying to go to the bathroom and take them but my friend i guess knew (he said he read my notebook cause he suspected i was writing... | -0.690208 | 1.320797 | 1.166345 | 101.696251 | 89.536398 | 4.134025 | 15.315907 | 5.423394 | -1.096249 | 916 | 18 | 231 | 5 | 31 | 298 | 123 | 261 | 0.066 | 0.805 | 0.129 | 0.9463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 15 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 24 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 53 | 55 | 25 | 1 | 8 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 2 | 36 | 7 | 24 | 33 | 3 | 27 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 20 | 6 | 0 | 7 | 15 | 142 | 45 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105958 | 0.149413 | 0.109472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.301144 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.329268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082546 | 0 | 0.111641 | 0 | 0.182162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094966 | 0 | 0 | 0.23487 | 0.08709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109253 | 0 | 0.052198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106871 | 0.121609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091242 | 0.203262 | 0 | 0 | 0.10813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116868 | 0 | 0.100697 | 0 | 0.240995 | 0 | 0.186769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13692 | 0 | 0 | 0.124601 | 0 | 0.202547 | 0 | 0.118705 | 0.362693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189054 | 0.084806 | 0.085702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | shaunhk | 2019/10/06 | Deeply suicidal :) I cant do it any longer.
I am 27 and in my 10 year old diaries I would write how I wanted to die. I've attempted multiple times but haven't pulled it off.
Catalysed by the first second date in my life. (I have a litany of psychosexual issues) and knowing I can never open up about it, having unsuppo... | 1.369545 | 2.971116 | 3.483928 | 90.296267 | 79.076628 | 6.531468 | 21.309512 | 7.423996 | 0.597031 | 949 | 26 | 214 | 13 | 23 | 324 | 141 | 261 | 0.202 | 0.676 | 0.122 | -0.9814 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 10 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 24 | 7 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 46 | 45 | 14 | 5 | 6 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 12 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 34 | 3 | 37 | 37 | 5 | 39 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 23 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 149 | 47 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112013 | 0 | 0 | 0.089991 | 0 | 0 | 0.073547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.448978 | 0 | 0 | 0.110698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101956 | 0 | 0.10937 | 0.077264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12293 | 0.090713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12816 | 0.072492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112882 | 0 | 0.19226 | 0 | 0 | 0.118875 | 0.176316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152782 | 0.052837 | 0 | 0.191 | 0.095711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117809 | 0.120132 | 0 | 0 | 0.114732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159008 | 0 | 0.083413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345243 | 0 | 0.12009 | 0.117118 | 0 | 0.074979 | 0.094434 | 0.112996 | 0 | 0.102238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123681 | 0 | 0 | 0.069299 | 0 | 0 | 0.063064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073428 | 0.117638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093408 | 0 | 0 | 0.191372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076828 | 0 | 0 | 0.069646 |
suicidewatch | timeywimey456 | 2019/10/06 | I’m a stalker and I want to kill my self After my first rollercoaster relationship we decided to call it quits and I accepted it and got on with my life. I see him all around campus and sometimes he talks to me. Before talking to me he unfriended me on Facebook so I just got on with my life. However afterwards, a coupl... | 0.883184 | 2.834417 | 3.272707 | 89.514768 | 82.128655 | 6.362711 | 21.462332 | 7.510576 | 0.759379 | 1,255 | 39 | 278 | 20 | 34 | 433 | 166 | 342 | 0.111 | 0.763 | 0.126 | 0.6593 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 31 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 18 | 3 | 1 | 14 | 3 | 15 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 55 | 51 | 27 | 2 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 19 | 20 | 1 | 4 | 10 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 12 | 10 | 58 | 13 | 43 | 38 | 3 | 42 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 29 | 19 | 1 | 7 | 21 | 192 | 77 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091473 | 0 | 0 | 0.096541 | 0 | 0 | 0.062638 | 0 | 0.087436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113695 | 0 | 0.132536 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067868 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096867 | 0 | 0.103911 | 0.073408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087403 | 0 | 0 | 0.238163 | 0.094995 | 0.161054 | 0 | 0.058398 | 0 | 0.328727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068874 | 0 | 0.103071 | 0.204116 | 0 | 0.118564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091333 | 0.113682 | 0 | 0.112942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145157 | 0.150601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109006 | 0 | 0 | 0.082017 | 0.109211 | 0 | 0.076191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139258 | 0.078149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09809 | 0 | 0 | 0.107356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081714 | 0 | 0 | 0.409409 | 0 | 0.107195 | 0 | 0 | 0.084999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119305 | 0.068265 | 0.065841 | 0 | 0 | 0.059917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200752 | 0.106971 | 0 | 0 | 0.113169 | 0 | 0.060607 | 0.081561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | imneverrelevantman | 2019/10/06 | how micodosing saved my life Basically I am an epileptic, my wife cheated on me, I lost my job, turned out my kid i was raising wasn't actually mine....the list goes on. It was a house of lies and I didn't want to be a part of it any longer....I made a deal with one of my hippy kind of friends. He said that if I did th... | 1.009331 | 2.98771 | 2.564807 | 94.6125 | 81.836879 | 6.014387 | 21.418946 | 7.168622 | 0.388801 | 521 | 16 | 123 | 7 | 14 | 170 | 92 | 141 | 0.086 | 0.798 | 0.116 | 0.8043 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 10 | 3 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 14 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 19 | 24 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 2 | 17 | 5 | 16 | 10 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 76 | 25 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0.173311 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.362321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137213 | 0 | 0.092788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204926 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17624 | 0 | 0 | 0.184943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193871 | 0 | 0.16029 | 0.168049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.397904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168938 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203309 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104753 | 0 | 0 | 0.216268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129295 | 0 | 0 | 0.252323 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | isallthisworthit | 2019/10/06 | Self thought answer to "why?" In previous post I mentioned I've been wanting to commit suicide for about 12 years now. I've came to my own conclusion that I will be happier, and for the thought that my gf and family would care doesnt matter like everything else people will feel pain for awhile but will soon be able to ... | 3.072251 | 4.471303 | 4.126688 | 88.333842 | 73.978355 | 6.691775 | 23.655844 | 7.168622 | 0.83779 | 887 | 25 | 183 | 9 | 18 | 288 | 135 | 231 | 0.213 | 0.561 | 0.225 | -0.1063 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 27 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 53 | 53 | 17 | 4 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 22 | 13 | 24 | 34 | 7 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 118 | 31 | 0 | 0.116556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133309 | 0.118836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119277 | 0.136602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097367 | 0 | 0 | 0.240866 | 0 | 0 | 0.105431 | 0 | 0 | 0.104753 | 0 | 0.109878 | 0 | 0.29467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127797 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10307 | 0.124076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121375 | 0.064056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113886 | 0 | 0 | 0.103148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077802 | 0 | 0.117096 | 0.126963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086425 | 0 | 0 | 0.123958 | 0 | 0 | 0.111838 | 0 | 0 | 0.124128 | 0 | 0 | 0.248047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080805 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132666 | 0.074669 | 0.119839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.486372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127493 | 0 | 0.109852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149368 | 0 | 0.185064 | 0.135929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082798 | 0 | 0 | 0.075058 |
suicidewatch | TriforceTattoo | 2019/10/06 | The Situation The time came about 25 hours ago now. While sitting around with friends I decided to do it and abruptly left to head home. I stopped to get my last cigarette and my last pint of whiskey and continued on my way. I seemed to be in the house alone, so I wrote out a note on a memo pad in the kitchen and hung ... | 3.014561 | 3.902551 | 3.75726 | 92.911979 | 73.431138 | 6.884032 | 26.790918 | 6.996648 | 0.958873 | 1,240 | 43 | 286 | 11 | 24 | 394 | 176 | 334 | 0.043 | 0.911 | 0.046 | 0.1933 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 37 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 28 | 0 | 19 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 48 | 47 | 19 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 16 | 21 | 2 | 4 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 11 | 34 | 4 | 44 | 23 | 7 | 58 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 9 | 22 | 0 | 4 | 29 | 177 | 50 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083768 | 0 | 0 | 0.097873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057606 | 0 | 0.160825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105493 | 0.096495 | 0.108083 | 0.096349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062416 | 0.170961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089086 | 0 | 0.047782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086371 | 0 | 0 | 0.103614 | 0.07301 | 0 | 0.098744 | 0.090653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096984 | 0 | 0.106508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189582 | 0 | 0.093063 | 0.10904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.616239 | 0 | 0 | 0.102674 | 0 | 0 | 0.046168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106222 | 0 | 0 | 0.160139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066887 | 0 | 0.075468 | 0.158012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181655 | 0 | 0.075022 | 0.220414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26852 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thewinterrsoldierr | 2019/10/06 | I guess this is it. I've been contemplating for a really really long time. As long as I can remember, honestly. But today really made me realize I'm truly alone in this. Goodbye everyone. | 1.533333 | 4.262572 | 5.573556 | 67.927 | 89.555556 | 11.768889 | 23.866667 | 10.355216 | 4.519673 | 148 | 6 | 25 | 8 | 5 | 56 | 28 | 36 | 0.056 | 0.78 | 0.164 | 0.5994 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 15 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26062 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.482742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.524183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.308967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15904 | 0 | 0.258531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | nurseandmeddoctor | 2019/10/06 | if i can survive you can survive
we are homo sapiens
we survived other humanoids
we can survive ourselves | 3.303509 | 6.451048 | 4.269474 | 75.732982 | 90.578947 | 2.533333 | 43.175439 | 3.1291 | 3.241302 | 87 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 28 | 13 | 19 | 0 | 0.837 | 0.163 | 0.5106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Azudra | 2019/10/06 | My future is dark I'm 23, diagnosed with depression, social phobia and dissociative disorder. I can't live alone and need help at everything. I've just been working for 4 years and already reached my limit two times. Have been in mental hospital for months but reached a down in my life again. I can't work, I can't wash... | 3.685517 | 4.461577 | 4.916724 | 85.63819 | 71.758621 | 8.903448 | 28.293103 | 9.188382 | 2.133452 | 440 | 16 | 96 | 9 | 8 | 146 | 82 | 116 | 0.115 | 0.742 | 0.143 | 0.3149 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 16 | 10 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 16 | 11 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 56 | 12 | 3 | 0.185576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192201 | 0.204788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159837 | 0.188356 | 0 | 0 | 0.212687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166784 | 0 | 0 | 0.208825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124388 | 0 | 0.186148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131078 | 0 | 0 | 0.327735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148125 | 0.197238 | 0 | 0.137602 | 0.143128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119505 |
suicidewatch | crazyways | 2019/10/06 | Dying from abuse 20 years later I’ve been in a feeling of free fall for weeks now. I woke up to a text from a relative with a screenshot of my father (and 18 year abuser) making some disgusting comments about women on Facebook. I dream almost every night about being a little girl, scared and shaking in bed as he rages ... | 2.720833 | 3.730328 | 3.878704 | 91.299167 | 74.277778 | 6.140741 | 22.759259 | 5.985473 | 0.277015 | 399 | 10 | 88 | 2 | 8 | 130 | 75 | 108 | 0.19 | 0.669 | 0.141 | -0.8665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 2 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 14 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 4 | 21 | 11 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 55 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0.43277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205508 | 0.092342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089223 | 0.183042 | 0.322529 | 0.16162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121906 | 0 | 0 | 0.198936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323157 | 0 | 0.146494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235214 |
suicidewatch | throwaway-abcdefghi7 | 2019/10/06 | I feel so trapped and I want sleep forever, but I never will If you knew me you would never think I was suicidal. Not even my therapist thinks it because even if I say I want to die she's just like "you're uncomfortable but it's okay" and it's like no shit. I didn't say I wanted to die because I'm all cozied up...
I h... | 1.556822 | 3.451416 | 3.617891 | 88.181977 | 79.5919 | 6.896822 | 21.603427 | 7.908726 | 0.955691 | 1,202 | 35 | 259 | 21 | 30 | 409 | 169 | 321 | 0.265 | 0.583 | 0.153 | -0.9943 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 29 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 19 | 3 | 2 | 14 | 1 | 22 | 12 | 3 | 6 | 6 | 69 | 45 | 32 | 10 | 12 | 21 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 16 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 8 | 42 | 10 | 27 | 32 | 6 | 20 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 16 | 6 | 1 | 6 | 14 | 175 | 55 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085337 | 0.124515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09922 | 0 | 0 | 0.09169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083602 | 0 | 0.070104 | 0 | 0.087946 | 0 | 0.064977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083902 | 0 | 0 | 0.506774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153441 | 0 | 0.123448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098408 | 0 | 0.062876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046252 | 0.06826 | 0 | 0.089725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081633 | 0 | 0 | 0.093905 | 0 | 0.091871 | 0 | 0.084942 | 0 | 0 | 0.180076 | 0 | 0.089451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088422 | 0 | 0.114966 | 0.159038 | 0 | 0 | 0.072021 | 0.068341 | 0 | 0 | 0.069189 | 0.073451 | 0 | 0.054324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082173 | 0.095314 | 0 | 0 | 0.059826 | 0 | 0.251069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104272 | 0.16735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129437 | 0.081478 | 0.082364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083538 | 0 | 0 | 0.162883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094491 | 0 | 0.15644 | 0 | 0 | 0.09491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067149 | 0.240008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082936 | 0.173436 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 192193945 | 2019/10/06 | I don’t want to live what people call life People say life is have a good education and get a job and work for the rest of your life. Who does that appeal to why would you want to do that. I’m 14 and I’m smart I could go to a good college and live “a good life” but. Just to work and go to sleep then work whats the poin... | -0.127785 | 1.479142 | 1.990968 | 99.193118 | 83.774194 | 5.68172 | 14.204301 | 6.742158 | -0.828622 | 531 | 6 | 139 | 6 | 15 | 178 | 85 | 155 | 0.155 | 0.73 | 0.115 | -0.9128 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 15 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 29 | 28 | 12 | 1 | 9 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 14 | 7 | 18 | 20 | 1 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 86 | 28 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135553 | 0 | 0.147453 | 0.326425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128733 | 0 | 0.143523 | 0 | 0.071294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.458148 | 0 | 0 | 0.229102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144046 | 0 | 0 | 0.179872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103164 | 0 | 0.13129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11664 | 0 | 0.117058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283327 | 0 | 0 | 0.276462 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NossiMcGeek | 2019/10/06 | One more step. I've struggled with depression for what feels like my whole life. And honestly, I'm just one step away from calling it quits.
This year has been the worst year of my life. I lost my grandmother to cancer, who was one of the most important people in my life. I got dumped by my (ex) boyfriend of 4 years ... | 3.534739 | 4.817762 | 4.798979 | 84.424884 | 72.643411 | 7.095037 | 28.848704 | 7.503016 | 1.707573 | 1,503 | 60 | 297 | 17 | 29 | 498 | 216 | 387 | 0.205 | 0.725 | 0.071 | -0.9959 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 63 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 14 | 20 | 6 | 3 | 12 | 0 | 22 | 15 | 3 | 2 | 5 | 41 | 47 | 15 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 12 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 12 | 16 | 0 | 4 | 15 | 4 | 42 | 4 | 60 | 27 | 4 | 48 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 22 | 19 | 2 | 3 | 21 | 188 | 58 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093015 | 0 | 0.07182 | 0.074729 | 0 | 0 | 0.122147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089067 | 0.062797 | 0.09202 | 0 | 0.079949 | 0 | 0 | 0.084379 | 0 | 0 | 0.164241 | 0 | 0 | 0.101184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099372 | 0 | 0.05792 | 0.092589 | 0.077353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091924 | 0 | 0.091906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059318 | 0.162475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10106 | 0.090821 | 0.06416 | 0.086231 | 0 | 0.082084 | 0.076392 | 0 | 0 | 0.069386 | 0.083027 | 0.093843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060197 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099361 | 0 | 0.049357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.292734 | 0.091836 | 0.317175 | 0.043876 | 0 | 0.158606 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059948 | 0 | 0 | 0.097829 | 0 | 0 | 0.090507 | 0.095273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172349 | 0 | 0.09424 | 0.095644 | 0.182571 | 0.068304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062262 | 0 | 0 | 0.098584 | 0.084899 | 0 | 0 | 0.091368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092188 | 0.074291 | 0 | 0 | 0.091549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093888 | 0 | 0.098237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067525 | 0 | 0.078497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142573 | 0 | 0.109364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100269 | 0 | 0.173146 | 0 | 0.065382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.289171 |
suicidewatch | jamate | 2019/10/06 | Checking In A few months back, I posted that I was ready to die. I then took a very large cocktail of pills and went to sleep expecting to never wake up again.
Here I am several months later, and I feel like I'm going down that road again, albeit much slower than before. I have an amazing fiance and a wonderful puppy... | 3.265897 | 4.638573 | 4.406496 | 86.624615 | 73.444444 | 7.251282 | 25.820513 | 7.793538 | 1.382446 | 452 | 15 | 92 | 6 | 9 | 148 | 82 | 117 | 0.031 | 0.777 | 0.192 | 0.9564 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 19 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 11 | 6 | 15 | 15 | 3 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 58 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201356 | 0.142247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14064 | 0.097277 | 0.199564 | 0 | 0 | 0.167205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.317861 | 0 | 0.146371 | 0 | 0.153569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.225952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183317 | 0.227704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221223 | 0.135185 | 0 | 0.194505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16429 | 0.117442 | 0.158047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | grape_lad | 2019/10/06 | Sometimes I forget that these thoughts aren't normal I've had active suicidal thoughts for the past 6 years. I'm used to waking up and wishing I hadn't. Sometimes I'll make a suicidal joke, or talk about wanting to die, and people will seem so shocked. Then I remember that this isn't normal. Normal people don't think o... | 4.136442 | 5.725341 | 4.683846 | 84.636154 | 71.596154 | 6.738462 | 27.423077 | 7.168622 | 1.429562 | 421 | 15 | 79 | 4 | 8 | 134 | 70 | 104 | 0.163 | 0.669 | 0.168 | -0.3402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 21 | 20 | 7 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 10 | 15 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 46 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246588 | 0 | 0 | 0.091943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068008 | 0 | 0.12292 | 0 | 0.116897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.545564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132887 | 0.289521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126727 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.456802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089197 | 0 | 0.221026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120228 | 0 | 0 | 0.082106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089643 |
suicidewatch | calamityecho | 2019/10/06 | Thinking of killing myself because I don’t have a future. I have so many things that I want to do in life, but the path to get there just seems so long and daunting. Aside from that, nothing that I actually love doing can pay the bills.
I’m not good at anything STEM/Finance/Medical/Managerial, and people keep saying t... | 7.311632 | 5.63228 | 7.813525 | 76.224121 | 64.508982 | 10.86497 | 34.348054 | 9.673873 | 2.97512 | 1,298 | 45 | 266 | 21 | 16 | 432 | 167 | 334 | 0.191 | 0.742 | 0.067 | -0.9941 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 32 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 17 | 5 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 27 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 51 | 67 | 23 | 2 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 15 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 37 | 6 | 45 | 59 | 4 | 29 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 14 | 20 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 179 | 54 | 8 | 0.087364 | 0 | 0.170509 | 0 | 0.104994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.359464 | 0.077772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072945 | 0.106512 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082359 | 0.098308 | 0.044174 | 0.062413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080766 | 0.182576 | 0.083807 | 0.148952 | 0.146553 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086695 | 0.232959 | 0.096655 | 0 | 0.096026 | 0 | 0 | 0.185011 | 0 | 0.089335 | 0.24683 | 0.042681 | 0.087561 | 0 | 0.154628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157698 | 0 | 0.174948 | 0.088573 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074608 | 0 | 0.069475 | 0 | 0.088417 | 0 | 0.159065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065687 | 0 | 0.07636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116081 | 0.055979 | 0 | 0 | 0.050942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.412235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062061 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | twintower98 | 2019/10/06 | Finally found a painless way to die. I found a subreddit on here where they explained if you can purchase a helium tank and inhale it, then stick your head in a sealed bag very quickly you can die painlessly. Helium will replace oxygen in your blood stream therefore replacing the reflex you get to breathe. It’ll feel l... | 2.200052 | 4.614566 | 3.383802 | 87.957308 | 80.202186 | 6.694162 | 22.746333 | 7.854513 | 1.202121 | 731 | 24 | 146 | 13 | 19 | 236 | 121 | 183 | 0.106 | 0.789 | 0.104 | 0.1698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 17 | 8 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 23 | 33 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 21 | 2 | 18 | 21 | 3 | 22 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 13 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 90 | 31 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115435 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.311606 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143448 | 0.13492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151812 | 0.107247 | 0.144141 | 0.164451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.329202 | 0 | 0 | 0.156865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133435 | 0 | 0 | 0.082503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106036 | 0.073342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327752 | 0 | 0.135491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.308196 | 0.124183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131213 | 0 | 0 | 0.174303 | 0 | 0.096192 | 0 | 0 | 0.175075 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123866 | 0 | 0.23832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | adulspood | 2019/10/06 | My 10 year old sister is suicidal ? Context :
I’m 17 years old and my sister is 10. About 3 days ago I found a book that she made hidden in a compartment in her bed . The cover was a poorly drawn person holding a knife or blade to their forearm. It has about 30 pages long but only had 3 filled in Including the first p... | 2.070538 | 4.064133 | 3.515395 | 89.055349 | 78.381443 | 6.166781 | 22.633448 | 7.168622 | 0.716065 | 746 | 23 | 157 | 9 | 18 | 245 | 116 | 194 | 0.106 | 0.792 | 0.102 | -0.2312 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 15 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 31 | 33 | 13 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 24 | 4 | 23 | 23 | 2 | 21 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 28 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 95 | 33 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121425 | 0 | 0.137944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162082 | 0.095161 | 0 | 0.127089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298433 | 0.105413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12551 | 0 | 0.161786 | 0 | 0.136412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131154 | 0 | 0 | 0.081092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072088 | 0 | 0.130294 | 0.130582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13962 | 0.098494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309668 | 0 | 0 | 0.336667 | 0 | 0 | 0.163842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140359 | 0.117342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161401 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140995 | 0 | 0.10018 | 0 | 0 | 0.15361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104819 | 0 | 0 | 0.190041 |
suicidewatch | D_hiver | 2019/10/06 | Bye I’m bipolar. Maybe I’ll get manic and judge myself for making this. Maybe I’ll go through with it. Probably not. I’m too weak to kill myself even though I want to. I’m selfish. I’m worthless. I’m sick. I’m broken. I’ll never get better. I’ll never escape. It haunts m e. I dream about her every night. I want to be h... | -1.759047 | 0.013245 | 1.031407 | 97.857524 | 105.747967 | 3.426583 | 14.66402 | 5.434041 | -0.853176 | 878 | 22 | 199 | 7 | 43 | 300 | 118 | 246 | 0.265 | 0.623 | 0.112 | -0.9841 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 41 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 19 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 22 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 35 | 50 | 8 | 4 | 11 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 16 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 30 | 10 | 25 | 40 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 115 | 38 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110141 | 0 | 0 | 0.108623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108592 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21931 | 0 | 0.070094 | 0 | 0.089415 | 0 | 0.190756 | 0 | 0.100045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081992 | 0 | 0.166337 | 0 | 0.060313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105406 | 0 | 0 | 0.113609 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105312 | 0 | 0.234822 | 0 | 0.058323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141678 | 0 | 0.213233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31476 | 0.245549 | 0 | 0 | 0.099591 | 0 | 0.101829 | 0 | 0 | 0.113019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120793 | 0.067986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.3549 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104267 | 0 | 0.061882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091658 | 0 | 0 | 0.187785 | 0.084237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150776 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | yg1990 | 2019/10/06 | Urgent help HK https://www.reddit.com/r/worldnews/comments/de0h54/thousands_defy_antimask_law_and_march_in_hong_kong/f2rstwn/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf can someone look at this please and help the bro/sis? Thank u guys!! | 42.8 | 55.706046 | 15.594444 | -6.055 | 9 | 4.622222 | 17.111111 | 6.427356 | -0.080689 | 234 | 2 | 15 | 1 | 3 | 44 | 17 | 18 | 0 | 0.453 | 0.547 | 0.9056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.654893 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.405133 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.331738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 4cidquen | 2019/10/06 | Planning my suicide makes me feel calmer during anxiety crisis Whenever I have a severe anxiety crisis my strategy to calm down is planning my suicide with every detail, from the time to the method. This makes me feel like there's a way out of my troubles and in 10 minutes I come back to normal. I always give up the id... | 11.502434 | 5.796356 | 11.227191 | 67.408727 | 60.685393 | 14.113858 | 42.026217 | 10.504224 | 4.276952 | 342 | 11 | 68 | 5 | 3 | 115 | 64 | 89 | 0.187 | 0.724 | 0.089 | -0.7906 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 15 | 15 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 3 | 13 | 15 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 42 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170183 | 0 | 0.181533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204262 | 0.1443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098681 | 0 | 0 | 0.178752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.404484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228188 | 0 | 0.167086 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.441882 | 0 | 0.19037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11778 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ThrowawayNumber97531 | 2019/10/06 | "I'm so done with your shit" well if I kill myself then you wont have to deal with my shit anymore. I'm fucking doing it again. I'm pushing everyone out of my life because I'm scared of hurting people and/or getting hurt. I can't stop doing it. And now I'm moving back to my old town where all of this shit started. I'm ... | 2.384199 | 3.593809 | 4.209891 | 87.811535 | 75.407767 | 6.315049 | 25.010922 | 6.627428 | 0.843768 | 760 | 25 | 162 | 6 | 16 | 258 | 106 | 206 | 0.236 | 0.707 | 0.057 | -0.9905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 22 | 14 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 18 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 46 | 15 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 7 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 29 | 3 | 24 | 36 | 3 | 27 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 4 | 13 | 109 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141979 | 0 | 0.168835 | 0 | 0.078559 | 0 | 0 | 0.081651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102152 | 0 | 0.05954 | 0.190359 | 0.079516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188954 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.341399 | 0.096468 | 0 | 0.209874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130419 | 0.045104 | 0 | 0.081522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108126 | 0 | 0.196246 | 0.067867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064004 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.473833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130691 | 0 | 0 | 0.15437 | 0 | 0 | 0.105686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100939 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Alt_Acc_4_Venting | 2019/10/06 | So people want me to stay I haven't killed myself yet because people are saying that I deserve to stay. Is this true? | 0.82125 | 3.285209 | 2.28 | 92.965 | 87.75 | 3.2 | 16.333333 | 3.1291 | -0.909067 | 93 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 30 | 20 | 24 | 0 | 0.681 | 0.319 | 0.8135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.46109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.708897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196144 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | x-FeatherDust-x | 2019/10/06 | I dont think i can take this anymore I hate myself and everyone else hates me. Why tf am I still here. | -1.418841 | 0.535996 | 1.252174 | 99.74029 | 93.782609 | 4.805797 | 16.362319 | 6.427356 | -0.467481 | 79 | 2 | 20 | 1 | 3 | 27 | 20 | 23 | 0.292 | 0.708 | 0 | -0.765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.36527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.615411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199703 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Milfruff03 | 2019/10/06 | Need someone to talk to I feel like I’m trapped in a endless loop of pain. I’m I have anxiety and I feel like I’ve lost most of my life to it. When I hang out with my friends I feel like I’m not allowed to laugh and have fun, I’m constantly faking smiles. I just want someone to talk to who knows how to deal with this k... | -0.690789 | 1.045292 | 1.312368 | 102.574079 | 86.631579 | 4.852632 | 20.026316 | 5.985473 | -0.380942 | 258 | 8 | 69 | 2 | 8 | 85 | 45 | 76 | 0.192 | 0.595 | 0.213 | 0.2206 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 14 | 12 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 36 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307537 | 0.434517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211125 | 0.111422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143203 | 0.297148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221317 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.343565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.325913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | maybefuckinglater | 2019/10/06 | I wish I could trade my life with someone that deserves it Someone with cancer, someone that was murdered, kids that died too young, someone that’s dearly missed, anybody. I just want to disappear I don’t want to hurt anyone if I did commit suicide. | 6.345674 | 7.206186 | 5.834894 | 81.133333 | 65.808511 | 7.11773 | 34.815603 | 6.427356 | 2.274254 | 199 | 9 | 34 | 1 | 3 | 61 | 34 | 47 | 0.389 | 0.447 | 0.164 | -0.9524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 22 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.772559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249338 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | xCyn1cal0wlx | 2019/10/06 | I just found out that all cold sores are herpies OMG I'VE HAD THEM ALL MY LIFE I want fucking die right now I feel sick to my stomach | -1.959885 | -0.633195 | -0.68431 | 108.577443 | 114.862069 | 1.933333 | 15.178161 | 3.1291 | -1.656867 | 105 | 3 | 26 | 0 | 6 | 32 | 25 | 29 | 0.236 | 0.723 | 0.041 | -0.8016 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.465735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.492035 | 0 | 0.414865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.316968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.383233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | DEADPOSUM | 2019/10/06 | My dad tried to OD last night Im 15 from new Zealand its 2:34 am as of me writing this my brother's are very distant to me and my dad as the title says tried to od last night I'm out of my depts even thinking about letoloan coping with it and my mum is laying a quilt trip on me I'm shaking and I'm not sure what to do I... | -0.939259 | 0.874178 | 1.322469 | 101.611111 | 88.382716 | 3.6 | 20.111111 | 3.1291 | -0.755015 | 275 | 9 | 70 | 0 | 9 | 92 | 54 | 81 | 0.102 | 0.898 | 0 | -0.7942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 10 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 1 | 14 | 10 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 38 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27324 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279862 | 0 | 0 | 0.412392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24431 | 0 | 0.474771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.343486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208718 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | blushingclouds | 2019/10/06 | wanting to die every single day now My life has always been mostly bad, even if I have good days they're all temporary while the bad days go on for longer. I have been suffering mentally for over a year now and it's not getting better. I relapsed yesterday and am convinced that I'm no better than the worst of the worst... | 2.743919 | 4.306032 | 4.580067 | 84.084848 | 75.148148 | 7.575758 | 23.383838 | 8.296473 | 1.389 | 517 | 15 | 104 | 9 | 11 | 176 | 84 | 135 | 0.345 | 0.575 | 0.08 | -0.9922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 20 | 11 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 13 | 17 | 5 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 66 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354408 | 0 | 0.156262 | 0.120395 | 0 | 0 | 0.375402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250632 | 0 | 0 | 0.093451 | 0 | 0.238418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109313 | 0 | 0.073921 | 0 | 0.080411 | 0.237346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199873 | 0.069124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.325238 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116742 | 0.166906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182226 |
suicidewatch | dogg2137 | 2019/10/06 | Why do I keep thinking of that? I have a convenient job, live rather comfortably, I have a loving gf and some good friends. I have some anxiety and depression issues, rather mild but very constant. Somehow, even on rather good days, I often think of attempting suicide - what would happen if I succeeded and what if not.... | 5.259265 | 6.291176 | 5.344762 | 83.064127 | 68.323308 | 8.617878 | 29.815372 | 8.841846 | 2.249453 | 545 | 20 | 106 | 9 | 9 | 171 | 90 | 133 | 0.14 | 0.63 | 0.229 | 0.903 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 9 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 14 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 25 | 23 | 9 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 15 | 10 | 10 | 18 | 3 | 15 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 7 | 11 | 72 | 24 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113827 | 0 | 0 | 0.10404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157404 | 0 | 0 | 0.160793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095959 | 0 | 0.128156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263574 | 0 | 0 | 0.098277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075234 | 0.106298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114957 | 0 | 0.077738 | 0 | 0.084563 | 0.249602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147329 | 0.131577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15816 | 0 | 0 | 0.099733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155302 | 0.147654 | 0.132254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105097 | 0.218079 | 0 | 0.131387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126499 | 0.134292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118569 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162756 | 0 | 0.140236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172761 | 0 | 0.190682 | 0.146189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12277 | 0 | 0.354316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151633 | 0.105699 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ugo8ygp9u8 | 2019/10/06 | fuck this joker shit like things weren't bad enough with being autistic and have social phobia now people are going to hate for for this fucking incel shit i'm never going to be safe i'm never going to be able to get help what the fuck is the point everybody hates me fuck everything | 2.325263 | 4.81046 | 3.434298 | 87.360921 | 80.22807 | 5.203509 | 16.517544 | 6.427356 | -0.106951 | 230 | 4 | 42 | 2 | 6 | 74 | 42 | 57 | 0.335 | 0.51 | 0.155 | -0.9473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 15 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 26 | 5 | 0 | 0.170343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.629917 | 0.088997 | 0 | 0.290429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.336357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Trynottobethisguy | 2019/10/06 | No way out. How can you all be so optimistic about suicide?
I'm honestly jealous of your naivety.
Life is pain, suffering, pointless and whatever we may call it.
Why should death be any different?
It's just an empty hope, a pretty lie most likely.
Death will probably suck as equally as life.
I don't believe in God, ... | 0.110376 | 2.447376 | 2.096968 | 93.64862 | 90.615385 | 5.520362 | 23.800905 | 7.048012 | 1.023204 | 489 | 21 | 106 | 8 | 17 | 162 | 85 | 130 | 0.251 | 0.587 | 0.162 | -0.8964 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 23 | 26 | 8 | 5 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 6 | 18 | 17 | 6 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 71 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.133831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.463537 | 0.143922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140038 | 0 | 0.139826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07537 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290603 | 0.067001 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139523 | 0.147862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.450034 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.326571 | 0 | 0 | 0.123307 | 0 | 0.12375 | 0 | 0.315414 | 0 | 0 | 0.099841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | jack_crowe6 | 2019/10/06 | How to stop someone from killing themselves My best mate is really struggling and nothing I’m saying is helping. It’s been working but it’s every night that I’m trying to talk him out of it. The stuff I usually say is losing it’s meaning
Help!? | 3.2832 | 4.88123 | 4.625 | 84.1675 | 73.8 | 6.6 | 30.5 | 7.168622 | 1.9038 | 196 | 9 | 37 | 2 | 4 | 65 | 39 | 50 | 0.192 | 0.727 | 0.08 | -0.7039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 23 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.310151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217115 | 0 | 0.221996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193427 | 0 | 0.241867 | 0.264851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Jebediah_Primm | 2019/10/06 | I’m alone I went to my school dance last night and I hated it. I felt so alone. Not just because slow dancing happened but because my friends were just not being around. I wanted to be near them and they’d just wander away. I was afraid I’d end up feeling like this. I hate it. I wanted to just leave the dance and walk ... | 0.182403 | 2.297632 | 1.249852 | 101.969824 | 86.244898 | 3.563636 | 17.072356 | 3.1291 | -1.162849 | 357 | 8 | 85 | 0 | 11 | 111 | 60 | 98 | 0.192 | 0.69 | 0.118 | -0.7906 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 22 | 18 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 13 | 3 | 12 | 11 | 0 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 55 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.409619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17604 | 0 | 0 | 0.185793 | 0 | 0 | 0.241093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099988 | 0.141273 | 0.189871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152781 | 0 | 0.206633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17487 | 0 | 0 | 0.390475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161193 | 0 | 0.209389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | yadayada__123 | 2019/10/06 | The cliche "life isnt worth it" post you've seen a million times on here I hate living
I really do
Every day as I get older and older and more so away from my past trauma the more I yearn for it. Things made sense back then, nothing makes sense now. I honest to god sympathize with Brooks from Shawshank so much it's n... | 1.560624 | 3.735642 | 2.784644 | 92.711261 | 81.022472 | 5.30387 | 21.686642 | 6.427356 | 0.333815 | 682 | 21 | 143 | 6 | 18 | 219 | 119 | 178 | 0.184 | 0.723 | 0.093 | -0.9605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 4 | 5 | 2 | 28 | 22 | 15 | 4 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 16 | 2 | 22 | 12 | 6 | 27 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 92 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153573 | 0.125688 | 0 | 0.099642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172916 | 0 | 0 | 0.176639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107962 | 0 | 0.137719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115454 | 0 | 0 | 0.144335 | 0.144654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309333 | 0.109109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240319 | 0 | 0.126068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156841 | 0 | 0.17152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104715 | 0 | 0.161394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.375934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116115 | 0 | 0 | 0.105261 |
suicidewatch | tothepeopleinmylife | 2019/10/06 | So, So, can we just wrap this up already? I was an accident. I didnt ask to be born and I'm too scared to die. That's the shit I live in everyday.
Does someone have a gun? Just put a fucking bullet in me already. I tried to do this and survive for other people. I usually did well in that regard. I placed my bets over... | -0.431529 | 1.780103 | 1.398366 | 98.511477 | 92.103448 | 4.175512 | 19.634183 | 5.792682 | -0.232509 | 636 | 21 | 146 | 5 | 23 | 207 | 106 | 174 | 0.194 | 0.773 | 0.033 | -0.9771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 18 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 16 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 34 | 26 | 16 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 18 | 2 | 19 | 18 | 3 | 25 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 11 | 2 | 6 | 8 | 99 | 26 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.51134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137499 | 0.144396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123321 | 0 | 0 | 0.099612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135166 | 0.158063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139715 | 0 | 0.14759 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142793 | 0.161394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107081 | 0 | 0.161374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147794 | 0 | 0.155272 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133401 | 0.170112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | RyuSamurai24 | 2019/10/06 | Today is the day. This is it. Counting down the hours until I'm alone in the house. Then I am gone for good. No more pain, no more suffering. My only regret is the way things turned out with the girl I fell in love with. That's really what broke me. If I had a second chance with her then I'd reconsider but there's none... | -0.200413 | 1.923434 | 1.762727 | 97.495629 | 88.363636 | 4.839161 | 15.734266 | 6.297961 | -0.607685 | 397 | 8 | 94 | 4 | 13 | 131 | 71 | 110 | 0.111 | 0.696 | 0.193 | 0.9287 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 16 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 13 | 5 | 15 | 11 | 4 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 66 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256299 | 0.215997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204844 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240512 | 0.281803 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172503 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185744 | 0.259872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244291 | 0 | 0.156457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | freyaistrans | 2019/10/06 | I feel like I'm in hell I see people being genuinely happy around me all the time, and I can only distract myself for so long being happy with them before it fades and I feel either nothing or overwhelming sadness. Me feeling happy should feel good, even if it isnt genuine, but it just feels like its setting me up so n... | 7.541302 | 6.794207 | 7.577354 | 75.086667 | 63.518519 | 9.78836 | 35.582011 | 8.841846 | 3.092757 | 554 | 22 | 98 | 7 | 7 | 179 | 86 | 135 | 0.055 | 0.669 | 0.276 | 0.9853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 17 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 29 | 22 | 12 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 15 | 11 | 13 | 17 | 3 | 20 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 14 | 70 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111091 | 0 | 0 | 0.082843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.443936 | 0.268814 | 0.120429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.534076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245108 | 0 | 0 | 0.110999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266785 | 0 | 0 | 0.2407 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080368 | 0 | 0 | 0.146275 | 0 | 0.11889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12782 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | emile_ | 2019/10/06 | [20, M] Chronically suicidal, burdened by PTSD, and missing my ex boyfriend like hell I just want all the pain to stop.
My dad physically abused me right up until I was about 13, and almost every single night I wake up in a cold sweat from a nightmare. I used to have my boyfriend to help ground me, but we've been apar... | 3.684158 | 4.160953 | 4.706275 | 88.235458 | 71.573529 | 7.220915 | 28.346405 | 6.937598 | 1.244372 | 507 | 18 | 112 | 4 | 9 | 166 | 90 | 136 | 0.294 | 0.651 | 0.055 | -0.9899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 12 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 12 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 15 | 17 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 19 | 2 | 23 | 14 | 4 | 17 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 12 | 4 | 1 | 6 | 68 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0.167567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093411 | 0 | 0.119158 | 0.135139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.392239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069094 | 0 | 0.124882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120777 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118239 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154697 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138951 | 0 | 0 | 0.650195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122147 | 0 | 0 | 0.083417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | kittinsune | 2019/10/06 | I'm so tired of the ups and downs. Every time I feel inspired, and like things are starting to feel better, I'm kicked in the face again by ptsd. The aftermath of what I survived often makes me wish that I didn't. No matter what I do, how hard I try, how much support I am given, how many healthy activities and fun ev... | 3.353028 | 4.442242 | 5.06561 | 83.086504 | 72.841463 | 8.637398 | 28.910569 | 9.075115 | 2.30903 | 625 | 25 | 131 | 13 | 12 | 213 | 96 | 164 | 0.139 | 0.67 | 0.191 | 0.7092 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 12 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 11 | 4 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 31 | 29 | 13 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 20 | 6 | 20 | 26 | 6 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 90 | 28 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138892 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264632 | 0 | 0.141141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086307 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076724 | 0 | 0.138672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133513 | 0 | 0 | 0.104828 | 0.159218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167106 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157157 | 0 | 0 | 0.1209 | 0 | 0 | 0.111156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17178 | 0.178211 | 0 | 0 | 0.118077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208666 | 0 | 0 | 0.124675 | 0.27472 | 0.180499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180592 | 0 | 0 | 0.11433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | xx_Undane_xx | 2019/10/06 | Why the fuck am I like this,, I’m 14 almost 15 in a few weeks. I don’t want to go to school anymore, I have to have a lesson with the guy who fucking sexually harassed/assaulted me and I’ve already missed so much of that lesson. My girlfriend has been having a hard time with her dysphoria and one of her friends and I f... | 3.38746 | 4.56253 | 5.03373 | 83.018214 | 72.862434 | 7.728042 | 27.785714 | 8.192908 | 1.835216 | 725 | 27 | 146 | 11 | 14 | 246 | 116 | 189 | 0.131 | 0.787 | 0.082 | -0.8779 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 18 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 30 | 36 | 9 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 26 | 3 | 20 | 26 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 13 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 97 | 31 | 2 | 0.134976 | 0 | 0.131717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270317 | 0.139794 | 0.148949 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103256 | 0 | 0.267719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087048 | 0 | 0.116254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127243 | 0 | 0.068248 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123365 | 0 | 0.163213 | 0 | 0.208564 | 0.249566 | 0 | 0 | 0.07671 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133647 | 0.119359 | 0 | 0.120912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149331 | 0 | 0.074179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138022 | 0 | 0.065942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099223 | 0 | 0.104102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091463 | 0.102655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153632 | 0 | 0.138777 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128393 | 0 | 0 | 0.136603 | 0.107558 | 0 | 0.140809 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107156 | 0.078705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238836 | 0.107137 | 0.108269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway445474 | 2019/10/06 | I just dont know what to do anymore I just don't know what to really say anymore I am 23 and I am MTF trans. The last year has been the toughest year of my life the love of my life leaves me and my sister dies in a car crash in the span of a few months now the last few months my mind I just can't think straight at all.... | -0.293486 | 1.144347 | 1.568489 | 102.861444 | 83.532374 | 4.564693 | 17.167128 | 4.713531 | -1.072426 | 466 | 9 | 126 | 1 | 13 | 153 | 77 | 139 | 0.089 | 0.817 | 0.093 | 0.5442 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 14 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 20 | 26 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 20 | 4 | 14 | 24 | 5 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 83 | 26 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1557 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131286 | 0 | 0.175825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165267 | 0 | 0.132664 | 0.159702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150485 | 0.149006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133347 | 0 | 0 | 0.164897 | 0.244577 | 0 | 0.158852 | 0 | 0 | 0.211931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135401 | 0 | 0.100141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15148 | 0 | 0.239493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28364 | 0 | 0.14368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141394 | 0 | 0.112798 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193219 |
suicidewatch | cranberrrysprite | 2019/10/06 | i cant do this anymore boyfriend doesnt love me, gender dysphoria is getting the better of me. im an asshole to everyone i love, im pretty sure ive got some issues up in my head, im only fucking 14. | 0.418333 | 1.822036 | 4.006389 | 86.37625 | 81.222222 | 6.277778 | 26.805556 | 7.168622 | 1.412889 | 155 | 7 | 34 | 2 | 4 | 58 | 35 | 45 | 0.143 | 0.679 | 0.178 | 0.169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 18 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193401 | 0.109298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.677912 | 0.218349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | october20191 | 2019/10/06 | Idk how to feel It's late and I can't sleep so I'm just gonna type this up
For the past year and a half I just haven't been feeling like myself anymore. About three years ago, work and life pulled me away from keeping in touch with close friends and family. Last summer, I called up my grandpa, who I hadn't talked to i... | 6.386777 | 4.273472 | 6.850307 | 83.782468 | 66.613636 | 9.990058 | 29.845275 | 8.216664 | 1.738653 | 2,249 | 53 | 523 | 23 | 29 | 739 | 243 | 616 | 0.174 | 0.693 | 0.133 | -0.9386 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 55 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 37 | 44 | 3 | 4 | 19 | 0 | 42 | 18 | 5 | 9 | 5 | 99 | 97 | 44 | 0 | 10 | 15 | 15 | 16 | 10 | 4 | 3 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 36 | 30 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 16 | 18 | 0 | 5 | 21 | 21 | 88 | 26 | 72 | 69 | 17 | 60 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 64 | 26 | 0 | 9 | 37 | 342 | 124 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084172 | 0.17516 | 0 | 0 | 0.071577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052192 | 0.110395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09889 | 0 | 0.043942 | 0.192487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055229 | 0.046545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058749 | 0.161215 | 0 | 0.107314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042019 | 0.058231 | 0 | 0.03394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059199 | 0 | 0 | 0.117387 | 0.208559 | 0.095209 | 0.044341 | 0.050288 | 0 | 0 | 0.099225 | 0.05922 | 0.319319 | 0.150388 | 0.05053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057703 | 0.162639 | 0 | 0.054991 | 0 | 0.029909 | 0.044141 | 0.084182 | 0.116043 | 0 | 0.052109 | 0.046538 | 0 | 0 | 0.103917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054929 | 0 | 0.046778 | 0 | 0 | 0.11569 | 0.128695 | 0.059366 | 0 | 0.05718 | 0.053815 | 0.185861 | 0.25711 | 0 | 0 | 0.093147 | 0 | 0.058876 | 0.057449 | 0.268451 | 0.189993 | 0 | 0.035129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053036 | 0 | 0 | 0.246546 | 0.042007 | 0 | 0.077374 | 0.039022 | 0.040589 | 0 | 0 | 0.049387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071323 | 0 | 0.167997 | 0 | 0.058436 | 0 | 0.050239 | 0.036485 | 0.091904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101143 | 0.05411 | 0.051963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083703 | 0 | 0 | 0.083874 | 0 | 0.109803 | 0 | 0 | 0.043534 | 0 | 0.052665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05205 | 0 | 0.03725 | 0 | 0.042028 | 0.043999 | 0 | 0 | 0.060246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0846 | 0.091997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.034963 | 0.067443 | 0 | 0 | 0.030687 | 0 | 0 | 0.100575 | 0 | 0.03573 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090906 | 0 | 0 | 0.124164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038313 | 0 | 0 | 0.07477 | 0 | 0 | 0.06778 |
suicidewatch | AscendToOblivion | 2019/10/06 | It's getting bad again. You ever come here to post because you're a piece of fucking shit who can't find their place in this pointless fucking void and all you want to do is cease to exist? Cause same.
I feel embarrassed to even post here, because it's a cry for attention, or help or whatever - if I was half the pers... | 2.358615 | 3.580417 | 3.513701 | 92.728647 | 75.493506 | 6.691775 | 24.521645 | 7.168622 | 0.780214 | 284 | 9 | 65 | 3 | 6 | 92 | 59 | 77 | 0.215 | 0.735 | 0.05 | -0.9359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 16 | 15 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 8 | 10 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 45 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181931 | 0.26565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223835 | 0 | 0.187695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173969 | 0 | 0.239344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143916 | 0.197096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.402875 | 0.11384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190255 | 0.227651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.41736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154784 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | compilingyesterdays | 2019/10/06 | Hey there, Reddit. I'm just worried that I'm slipping.
I have horrible OCD and I can't talk about its particulars much. It makes it hard for me to move around in physical space. Just lately. It did this starting in junior year of high school, but it was never this exact severity.
I gave up a job, for example. I've dr... | 1.913603 | 4.664997 | 3.257341 | 85.773712 | 85.812227 | 6.477398 | 26.673844 | 7.753152 | 1.987269 | 943 | 43 | 175 | 19 | 29 | 306 | 142 | 229 | 0.083 | 0.859 | 0.057 | -0.5647 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 35 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 14 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 27 | 30 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 22 | 3 | 26 | 21 | 5 | 32 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 18 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 113 | 40 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115719 | 0 | 0 | 0.244261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109523 | 0 | 0.116827 | 0.127156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203744 | 0 | 0.073877 | 0 | 0.103965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116446 | 0 | 0 | 0.138174 | 0 | 0 | 0.08713 | 0.137342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128996 | 0.115542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146635 | 0 | 0 | 0.132924 | 0 | 0.127014 | 0.130285 | 0.114784 | 0 | 0 | 0.145426 | 0 | 0.110514 | 0 | 0 | 0.08677 | 0.13179 | 0.130593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13816 | 0.286675 | 0 | 0.100257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138436 | 0.088085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.293705 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130085 | 0 | 0 | 0.100073 | 0 | 0 | 0.092008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08636 | 0.083293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.396036 | 0 | 0.092342 | 0 | 0 | 0.08371 |
suicidewatch | bobithianluck | 2019/10/06 | Don't know what to even do anymore I feel like I've been clinging on to fake ideas and desires that arent real. There isn't any meaning in anything I've been doing for the past few years and I've just been wanting to end it. I feel like i'm clinging to these ideas as a means to give myself meaning or motive but I know ... | 2.517077 | 3.603307 | 3.44902 | 93.885033 | 74.882353 | 5.625023 | 24.986928 | 5.033349 | 0.303823 | 438 | 14 | 99 | 1 | 9 | 140 | 73 | 119 | 0.132 | 0.778 | 0.091 | -0.5896 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 30 | 28 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 10 | 7 | 12 | 24 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 58 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28171 | 0 | 0 | 0.116878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118648 | 0 | 0.125796 | 0 | 0 | 0.187618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287258 | 0.304398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136248 | 0 | 0.119128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163883 | 0 | 0.320668 | 0.153416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147902 | 0.234167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.464136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091462 |
suicidewatch | biochemwhissan | 2019/10/06 | Lifeline (Australia) Chat Sucks - Heres my transcript I know it's a live chat and its a sorta 'what do you expect' kind of thing so just consider this an educational post and a strong hint to save your time and emotions if you were ever considering using lifeline live chat,
If TLDR; they just give scripted generic res... | 1.738386 | 4.189909 | 3.037408 | 89.498545 | 82.430986 | 5.714265 | 21.834958 | 7.053033 | 0.698166 | 7,016 | 226 | 1,413 | 92 | 195 | 2,268 | 531 | 1,775 | 0.081 | 0.803 | 0.116 | 0.9958 | 9 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 358 | 3 | 52 | 5 | 6 | 62 | 66 | 2 | 6 | 74 | 3 | 103 | 23 | 3 | 15 | 14 | 236 | 228 | 91 | 4 | 23 | 48 | 3 | 14 | 5 | 0 | 10 | 17 | 8 | 0 | 7 | 75 | 66 | 2 | 9 | 48 | 7 | 2 | 14 | 25 | 16 | 2 | 4 | 46 | 27 | 159 | 51 | 233 | 166 | 34 | 211 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 120 | 130 | 2 | 31 | 65 | 809 | 234 | 17 | 0.037177 | 0 | 0.036279 | 0 | 0.089359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.02973 | 0 | 0.201406 | 0.045174 | 0.101126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05199 | 0 | 0.061187 | 0.033095 | 0.034755 | 0 | 0.034929 | 0.028587 | 0 | 0.022663 | 0.041059 | 0 | 0.041886 | 0 | 0.03288 | 0.16235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075924 | 0 | 0.151617 | 0 | 0.039328 | 0.064049 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047952 | 0 | 0.03202 | 0.037734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032534 | 0 | 0.043571 | 0.036419 | 0.172454 | 0 | 0 | 0.041819 | 0.098783 | 0 | 0 | 0.024555 | 0.067257 | 0.031323 | 0.035524 | 0 | 0 | 0.070094 | 0 | 0.225573 | 0 | 0.035696 | 0 | 0 | 0.031623 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097117 | 0.178317 | 0.042257 | 0.062364 | 0.029734 | 0 | 0.040955 | 0 | 0 | 0.079151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083802 | 0 | 0.124594 | 0.039279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066089 | 0.041131 | 0.077428 | 0.061294 | 0.060608 | 0.083874 | 0.039365 | 0 | 0 | 0.157555 | 0.090814 | 0.037261 | 0.098484 | 0 | 0.062438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.033554 | 0 | 0.074448 | 0.150766 | 0 | 0.040497 | 0.041295 | 0.074904 | 0 | 0.157755 | 0.037538 | 0 | 0.029674 | 0 | 0.081988 | 0.110265 | 0.114692 | 0.035906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035672 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050384 | 0.028275 | 0.039559 | 0 | 0.123842 | 0 | 0.03549 | 0.051548 | 0.032461 | 0 | 0.040809 | 0 | 0 | 0.035605 | 0.075645 | 0 | 0.035573 | 0 | 0.037373 | 0 | 0.039542 | 0.037187 | 0 | 0.119082 | 0 | 0 | 0.039914 | 0 | 0.031749 | 0.035364 | 0.029565 | 0.074441 | 0 | 0.088876 | 0 | 0.038784 | 0 | 0 | 0.092259 | 0 | 0.037204 | 0 | 0 | 0.028621 | 0 | 0.083233 | 0.026314 | 0 | 0.02969 | 0.031082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121996 | 0.21094 | 0.070078 | 0 | 0.11181 | 0.059763 | 0.097483 | 0.068455 | 0 | 0 | 0.172891 | 0.142929 | 0 | 0.265629 | 0.130069 | 0.085459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100963 | 0 | 0.036316 | 0.15481 | 0 | 0.256871 | 0 | 0.06135 | 0.065784 | 0.029509 | 0 | 0 | 0.033427 | 0 | 0 | 0.041507 | 0 | 0 | 0.040317 | 0 | 0.037755 | 0.037886 | 0.158456 | 0 | 0.045174 | 0.095763 |
suicidewatch | fuctmyself | 2019/10/06 | Decide if I die or not please. I have no friends, I dont want to have a career, I dont want to be poor, I have a shitty family, I dont want to try anything that will put me in debt cause I'm fucking poor and dont want to try anything that's challenging, I have many great mental illnesses (woopty fucking do to me yayy, ... | 0.742847 | 2.859463 | 2.806394 | 91.714251 | 83.778761 | 5.89056 | 20.921091 | 7.168622 | 0.527785 | 419 | 13 | 93 | 6 | 12 | 141 | 63 | 113 | 0.263 | 0.583 | 0.153 | -0.9077 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 17 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 18 | 30 | 7 | 3 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 5 | 7 | 25 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 59 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194301 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121277 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.553446 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09121 | 0.436565 | 0 | 0.113251 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213101 | 0 | 0 | 0.119691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259181 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | CarelessScar | 2019/10/06 | I'm dead as of ~2-3 am PST on 10/6/2019, please don't waste your time on messages Hello, I'm about to format my hard drive and end my life. To those who check up on me: thank you for thinking about me and trying to help. But I don't want you to waste your time. I'll be dead by ~3 AM PST on October 6th, 2019.
I don't ... | 0.714219 | 1.377898 | 2.539937 | 100.303745 | 78.746835 | 5.772996 | 18.229958 | 5.461319 | -0.752141 | 261 | 4 | 72 | 1 | 6 | 87 | 51 | 79 | 0.147 | 0.709 | 0.144 | -0.0721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 14 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 1 | 16 | 13 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 39 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.298586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223415 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.296267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.365882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.306873 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213576 | 0 | 0 | 0.388719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.393198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | UnashamedLiar | 2019/10/06 | Selfish? Whenever I think about killing myself, I always think about other people. I think about my friends... my family... I think about the people I've told I'm suicidal most of all. I think about how killing myself when they knew I'm suicidal will affect them.
But I just never seem to be thinking about myself. Shou... | 1.508275 | 4.06011 | 2.608596 | 91.400731 | 84.789474 | 5.483041 | 20.28655 | 6.937598 | 0.509674 | 302 | 9 | 60 | 4 | 9 | 96 | 42 | 76 | 0.334 | 0.635 | 0.031 | -0.9832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 20 | 19 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 17 | 1 | 10 | 12 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 44 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.376701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.236053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.372441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.654516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | thelordyeetethaway | 2019/10/06 | Tonight I think I might try, tonight. I've been thinking about it for a bit, contemplated this all night last night.
My life isn't hard. It would probably be somewhat less stressful if I did everything I needed too and stopped procrastinating. But here I am lol. Procrastinating. Entertaining the idea of killing myself... | 2.831689 | 5.553538 | 4.11159 | 81.805368 | 80.098039 | 7.2507 | 25.185574 | 8.306716 | 1.990616 | 1,067 | 41 | 194 | 23 | 28 | 349 | 142 | 255 | 0.164 | 0.708 | 0.128 | -0.9475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 52 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 14 | 1 | 3 | 16 | 2 | 27 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 54 | 50 | 17 | 2 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 24 | 7 | 23 | 36 | 10 | 30 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 9 | 20 | 138 | 37 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08529 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099037 | 0.093149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092124 | 0.114667 | 0 | 0 | 0.084484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176229 | 0.093543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104125 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076851 | 0.159874 | 0 | 0 | 0.194526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223492 | 0 | 0 | 0.104191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103766 | 0.209787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116021 | 0.07336 | 0 | 0.08277 | 0.346605 | 0.118724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265644 | 0 | 0.164564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140735 | 0 | 0 | 0.107897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093523 | 0.23143 | 0.119186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147252 | 0 | 0 | 0.066743 |
suicidewatch | Bamblag | 2019/10/06 | Whats the point of life if no one in the opposite sex desires me? Since reproduction is one of life's basic functions, and since we are asexual beings it is one of our basic duties as a human being to attract a person of the opposite sex to procreate.
Ofcourse, im not going into every relationship, or approaching ever... | 6.762306 | 6.707758 | 8.014986 | 69.01141 | 64.876289 | 10.5597 | 35.162137 | 10.230975 | 3.75014 | 798 | 34 | 136 | 17 | 11 | 275 | 118 | 194 | 0.05 | 0.899 | 0.051 | 0.0245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 20 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 29 | 22 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 5 | 21 | 16 | 5 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 102 | 23 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122591 | 0 | 0.312762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203322 | 0.16964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102004 | 0.151294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262198 | 0.090678 | 0 | 0.163893 | 0.164255 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286301 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.377314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162064 | 0 | 0 | 0.175457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | UnstablePersonality3 | 2019/10/06 | Each hour seems like a stupid amount of time to wait aThings will get better. Whatever. It's now obvious this is is a problem in my head that won't be getting fixed. I have to live this long shitty life one minute at a time. Each day brings a non stop joy ride of chores, pains, problems. Every moment is a "what now". "... | 1.530742 | 3.508752 | 2.769711 | 93.817724 | 80.052632 | 6.285263 | 18.583971 | 7.365786 | 0.129369 | 787 | 17 | 180 | 11 | 20 | 253 | 118 | 209 | 0.128 | 0.775 | 0.097 | -0.8738 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 31 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 11 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 14 | 10 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 24 | 33 | 8 | 1 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 12 | 4 | 29 | 24 | 9 | 38 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 29 | 112 | 25 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257043 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051419 | 0.07265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159392 | 0.097554 | 0.115589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.600885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287316 | 0.099364 | 0 | 0.089797 | 0.089995 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067881 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06891 | 0 | 0.108209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203534 | 0 | 0 | 0.078289 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.355789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112001 | 0 | 0.119963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113537 | 0 | 0.098029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | hunting-my-own-skin | 2019/10/06 | This life is too much. Every time I get excited about something I hold myself back because I know or my anxiety “knows”, something will happen to hinder me. This could be internal or external.
I’m just sitting drunk (again) in my room, dreading work tomorrow. A few months ago I went to work with a bunch of bandages up ... | 3.964672 | 4.540035 | 4.927379 | 86.546089 | 70.993007 | 8.258815 | 28.339345 | 8.371476 | 1.760716 | 1,085 | 38 | 235 | 16 | 19 | 355 | 149 | 286 | 0.129 | 0.726 | 0.146 | 0.2598 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 40 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 18 | 17 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 23 | 11 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 51 | 49 | 13 | 1 | 8 | 16 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 37 | 11 | 39 | 39 | 10 | 35 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 15 | 0 | 8 | 13 | 155 | 42 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180504 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095658 | 0.078289 | 0 | 0.062065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114193 | 0.08129 | 0 | 0.111838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208422 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085783 | 0 | 0.183008 | 0 | 0.095981 | 0 | 0.102961 | 0.072736 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078661 | 0 | 0.106387 | 0.097669 | 0.115727 | 0.085397 | 0 | 0.11225 | 0.11216 | 0 | 0.180068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108224 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107572 | 0.102128 | 0.101124 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112642 | 0 | 0.167863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.287657 | 0.049741 | 0 | 0 | 0.090102 | 0 | 0.113904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113093 | 0 | 0.102605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081267 | 0 | 0.14969 | 0.075494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104682 | 0 | 0.10931 | 0 | 0.347795 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.313526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081309 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115537 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093737 | 0 | 0.118214 | 0 | 0.130477 | 0 | 0 | 0.059369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180158 | 0.080815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098145 | 0 | 0.222366 | 0 | 0.103757 | 0 | 0.111318 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Dylan_J_W | 2019/10/06 | I need help For the past two weeks my girlfriend has been feeling extremely depressed, sad, frustrated and has contemplated ending it all on many occasions.
She's diagnosed with multiple mental illnesses and has been in hospital multiple times for attempts at suicide before we met.
I do everything i can im always t... | 3.098834 | 5.179137 | 4.091617 | 85.715732 | 75.567657 | 6.733113 | 24.753575 | 7.662119 | 1.327461 | 1,217 | 41 | 233 | 17 | 27 | 393 | 166 | 303 | 0.277 | 0.62 | 0.103 | -0.9968 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 19 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 24 | 5 | 4 | 10 | 1 | 31 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 6 | 54 | 57 | 20 | 1 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 11 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 8 | 48 | 5 | 30 | 36 | 10 | 43 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 33 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 165 | 59 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072842 | 0.075791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074957 | 0 | 0.085154 | 0.207248 | 0.085579 | 0 | 0 | 0.055526 | 0 | 0.232524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072725 | 0 | 0.100054 | 0 | 0 | 0.078453 | 0.092451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079711 | 0.093213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161351 | 0.094117 | 0 | 0 | 0.082393 | 0 | 0 | 0.081863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138168 | 0.065072 | 0.174915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070373 | 0 | 0 | 0.087379 | 0.051767 | 0.076399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089702 | 0 | 0.09751 | 0 | 0.295168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086188 | 0.060801 | 0.184695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091794 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202619 | 0.070252 | 0 | 0 | 0.256436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096923 | 0.213741 | 0 | 0 | 0.086952 | 0 | 0.079533 | 0 | 0.099986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097793 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072436 | 0.182387 | 0 | 0.145168 | 0 | 0.095023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077177 | 0.140246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097086 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099634 | 0.206728 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060514 | 0.116729 | 0 | 0.144625 | 0.15934 | 0 | 0.086339 | 0 | 0 | 0.061842 | 0 | 0.088978 | 0 | 0.109566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214901 | 0 | 0.073064 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MissHoney97 | 2019/10/06 | I’m really worried about my Mom, need help Okay so this is gonna be super long (and apologies for formatting, I’m on mobile).
So on Friday morning after my mom left for work I was trying to sleep and a utility pole fell on our house (we live in a trailer park). A garbage truck got tangled in the wires and decided the ... | 1.908958 | 3.159444 | 3.447877 | 92.632315 | 76.705479 | 6.421239 | 21.418395 | 6.930791 | 0.305882 | 3,177 | 78 | 737 | 31 | 70 | 1,051 | 292 | 876 | 0.172 | 0.753 | 0.075 | -0.9986 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 82 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 32 | 41 | 4 | 8 | 33 | 5 | 84 | 5 | 4 | 9 | 14 | 151 | 168 | 67 | 4 | 14 | 30 | 5 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 63 | 49 | 0 | 10 | 21 | 1 | 3 | 18 | 33 | 25 | 1 | 1 | 50 | 24 | 130 | 16 | 104 | 97 | 21 | 98 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 80 | 47 | 0 | 9 | 34 | 521 | 193 | 2 | 0.136227 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04703 | 0 | 0.072627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092639 | 0 | 0.034738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037368 | 0 | 0.042451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037914 | 0.083042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095308 | 0 | 0.049575 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046647 | 0 | 0.156463 | 0.04761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099759 | 0 | 0 | 0.117332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.037933 | 0 | 0 | 0.046919 | 0 | 0.059984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081621 | 0 | 0 | 0.051098 | 0.160721 | 0.12976 | 0.0436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.023724 | 0 | 0.180648 | 0 | 0.072635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08031 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046603 | 0 | 0.051179 | 0 | 0.09131 | 0 | 0.045549 | 0 | 0 | 0.261979 | 0.048611 | 0.051261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121084 | 0.100476 | 0 | 0.124778 | 0 | 0 | 0.048081 | 0.049337 | 0 | 0 | 0.088738 | 0.045512 | 0.080194 | 0.080371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038605 | 0 | 0.085934 | 0.090932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048172 | 0 | 0.265912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16835 | 0.070044 | 0 | 0 | 0.085226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096718 | 0 | 0.069071 | 0 | 0.053278 | 0 | 0 | 0.086696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155116 | 0.259165 | 0.072222 | 0.045462 | 0 | 0.108555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051041 | 0.090883 | 0 | 0.038475 | 0.034958 | 0 | 0 | 0.032141 | 0.0968 | 0.036264 | 0.113892 | 0.156047 | 0 | 0.051982 | 0.09934 | 0 | 0.042797 | 0 | 0 | 0.072996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.030168 | 0 | 0 | 0.03605 | 0.026478 | 0 | 0 | 0.390511 | 0 | 0.246637 | 0 | 0.044358 | 0 | 0.109243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053567 | 0.036043 | 0 | 0 | 0.040828 | 0.084189 | 0 | 0.050697 | 0 | 0.043773 | 0 | 0.033058 | 0.09223 | 0 | 0.096771 | 0 | 0 | 0.029242 |
suicidewatch | OGBrownMan512 | 2019/10/06 | I am ready to go. i work a customer service job in the food industry, to be specific I make specialty drinks. today at work, there was a huge influx of people and only two of us to make 30 drinks. a man who had been waiting for awhile walked up and told me to my face, that “if I couldn’t make a fucking drink in under 5... | 0.688482 | 2.514618 | 2.597817 | 94.7575 | 82.125 | 5.780952 | 22.785714 | 6.86897 | 0.524563 | 519 | 18 | 121 | 6 | 14 | 173 | 93 | 144 | 0.108 | 0.772 | 0.12 | -0.0636 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 3 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 12 | 10 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 18 | 26 | 7 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 3 | 19 | 3 | 19 | 17 | 3 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 9 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 81 | 26 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169954 | 0.426171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17535 | 0 | 0.112036 | 0.268123 | 0 | 0 | 0.082414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142808 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143902 | 0 | 0.160435 | 0 | 0 | 0.118204 | 0 | 0 | 0.157556 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123284 | 0.130879 | 0 | 0.290391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098264 | 0.110289 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201067 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137455 | 0.138566 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283312 | 0 | 0.174432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171064 | 0.230208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166757 | 0 | 0 | 0.211142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BobbyHill4 | 2019/10/06 | It feels like the universe is telling me to kill myself at this point I have absolutely nothing left to live for, every time i get the slightest hope that things are getting better it falls to pieces immediately, i don’t know what it is that I’ve done to deserve this but apparently the universe is mad at me for some re... | 6.894146 | 5.319245 | 6.987114 | 81.481159 | 65.260163 | 9.17561 | 33.50813 | 7.168622 | 2.026584 | 472 | 16 | 101 | 3 | 6 | 152 | 67 | 123 | 0.199 | 0.716 | 0.085 | -0.968 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 15 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 30 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 12 | 5 | 13 | 27 | 3 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 3 | 6 | 69 | 27 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147602 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.341577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110231 | 0 | 0.140614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168771 | 0.238455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.462867 | 0.174388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184641 | 0 | 0.183439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181329 | 0 | 0.117881 | 0.16307 | 0 | 0.147369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182553 | 0 | 0.157294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | hellocuba | 2019/10/06 | I've been hospitalized a total of 5 times since 2019 started due to severe suicidal ideation. There won't be a next time. This year I got diagnosed with Bipolar 2. I was in denial at first but i've come to accept it now. I struggle with addiction as well (stimulants) so of course that doesn't allow my meds to work pro... | 2.558391 | 4.154853 | 3.852155 | 88.966279 | 75.724138 | 7.178161 | 25.531609 | 7.937092 | 1.328954 | 1,105 | 39 | 239 | 17 | 24 | 362 | 163 | 290 | 0.157 | 0.72 | 0.123 | -0.7941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 13 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 0 | 28 | 14 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 31 | 49 | 15 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 10 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 3 | 21 | 5 | 34 | 26 | 7 | 38 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 16 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 154 | 39 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13259 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114271 | 0 | 0 | 0.074142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124005 | 0 | 0 | 0.10477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063544 | 0 | 0.138245 | 0 | 0.19455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257008 | 0 | 0 | 0.119777 | 0 | 0.260405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103402 | 0.109772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12935 | 0.114137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092502 | 0.129418 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116379 | 0 | 0.122267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09692 | 0 | 0.126882 | 0.137402 | 0 | 0.30183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120291 | 0 | 0.258261 | 0 | 0.09713 | 0 | 0 | 0.127149 | 0 | 0.266077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193114 | 0.283683 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105045 | 0 | 0 | 0.071738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088545 | 0 | 0 | 0.086399 | 0 | 0 | 0.078323 |
suicidewatch | TA420-69 | 2019/10/06 | I f*cked up my life real bad and it's all my fault. I've been dealing with hardcore depression. I ruined all chances of keeping a steady well paying job. I'm losing my friends. I just lost my car and can't ever get it back.
The list goes on. On the plus side, I haven't wanted to try killing myself for a good month now... | 0.586283 | 2.706781 | 2.200978 | 95.787607 | 84.467626 | 4.569976 | 18.619185 | 5.683918 | -0.376836 | 513 | 13 | 114 | 3 | 15 | 167 | 92 | 139 | 0.211 | 0.659 | 0.13 | -0.9295 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 15 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 26 | 24 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 17 | 6 | 18 | 21 | 7 | 21 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 74 | 21 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256402 | 0.139208 | 0 | 0.184134 | 0 | 0 | 0.174967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143619 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171886 | 0.1436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128811 | 0.154134 | 0.174214 | 0 | 0.189507 | 0.139841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165449 | 0.296385 | 0.184456 | 0 | 0.091628 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.235525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186522 | 0.182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11129 | 0 | 0.167497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133078 | 0 | 0.122562 | 0.123624 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15178 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10683 | 0 | 0 | 0.097219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137565 | 0.098339 | 0.132338 | 0 | 0 | 0.149906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Zarths | 2019/10/06 | I saw a woman get abused and did nothing Nothing isn’t true, I wanted to get out the rain so I stood under the bus shelter, she was crying and her boyfriend? was just all raged up, saying things like, ”you keep crying and I’ll fuck this guy up” he did attack me, nothing I couldn’t handle but I felt I could have done mo... | 0.527368 | 2.263722 | 1.731937 | 101.219863 | 82.219178 | 4.445401 | 15.908023 | 4.655896 | -1.17737 | 519 | 8 | 129 | 1 | 14 | 164 | 82 | 146 | 0.172 | 0.64 | 0.188 | 0.5454 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 16 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 18 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 33 | 36 | 9 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 7 | 22 | 8 | 11 | 18 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 83 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 0.170429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11837 | 0 | 0 | 0.163641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229693 | 0 | 0.316008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127401 | 0 | 0 | 0.095006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.218193 | 0.205522 | 0.276222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13298 | 0.150303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158458 | 0.142426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.35137 | 0 | 0.127015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136107 | 0.096016 | 0 | 0.144509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.414061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095562 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169684 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146587 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheLonelySkateboard | 2019/10/06 | Telling people about suicidal thoughts just complicates things or simply makes everything worse. When I told my friends in college, they basically wrote it off like it was nothing. At first they were concerned, sure. But thankfully that didn’t last too long. They’ve seem to have pretty much forgotten about what I had t... | 5.074231 | 6.434433 | 5.56011 | 80.13489 | 69.018315 | 8.896703 | 31.399267 | 9.265574 | 2.80787 | 2,261 | 95 | 419 | 45 | 39 | 726 | 257 | 546 | 0.116 | 0.733 | 0.151 | 0.9191 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 55 | 0 | 10 | 4 | 4 | 36 | 35 | 4 | 5 | 22 | 1 | 52 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 9 | 89 | 91 | 35 | 3 | 16 | 15 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 32 | 17 | 1 | 6 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 21 | 15 | 3 | 2 | 26 | 11 | 58 | 20 | 68 | 50 | 11 | 64 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 42 | 30 | 2 | 14 | 26 | 300 | 90 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0.067051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151646 | 0.054947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068142 | 0.048044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078586 | 0.070054 | 0.070584 | 0 | 0 | 0.144082 | 0 | 0 | 0.109719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062152 | 0 | 0.065655 | 0.123504 | 0 | 0.064774 | 0 | 0.138967 | 0 | 0.065972 | 0 | 0.0628 | 0.116889 | 0 | 0 | 0.159255 | 0.063521 | 0 | 0 | 0.156198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075692 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046055 | 0 | 0 | 0.068244 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061073 | 0.076017 | 0 | 0.037761 | 0.056008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145595 | 0.067136 | 0.068865 | 0 | 0.121612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058415 | 0 | 0 | 0.045864 | 0 | 0.069028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054844 | 0 | 0.151529 | 0.050948 | 0.15898 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074406 | 0 | 0.285809 | 0.059995 | 0.143574 | 0 | 0.129906 | 0 | 0 | 0.139805 | 0.074081 | 0.065746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058678 | 0 | 0.163923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062551 | 0 | 0.077623 | 0 | 0.056838 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146471 | 0.054872 | 0.057445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075157 | 0.077971 | 0.194275 | 0 | 0.051661 | 0 | 0.360333 | 0.126518 | 0.235727 | 0 | 0.045648 | 0.044027 | 0.067507 | 0.109096 | 0.040065 | 0 | 0 | 0.196966 | 0 | 0.093299 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162108 | 0.054539 | 0 | 0 | 0.185335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079013 | 0 | 0 | 0.050022 | 0 | 0.070021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Soma_a1 | 2019/10/06 | Not sure what to do I've really thought about slitting my own throat this Monday or Tuesday. I've never been this onboard with me commiting suicide before. I know I'll probably chicken out and even if I do it it'll hurt like hell and might not even kill me, but I just want this all to end.
It's gotten so bad that I ba... | 4.255881 | 4.569335 | 5.177002 | 85.949029 | 70.236749 | 7.985002 | 26.676286 | 7.793538 | 1.337395 | 1,071 | 31 | 230 | 12 | 18 | 351 | 148 | 283 | 0.228 | 0.614 | 0.158 | -0.9837 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 22 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 23 | 25 | 5 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 20 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 51 | 47 | 24 | 4 | 9 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 15 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 30 | 13 | 24 | 35 | 11 | 28 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 10 | 2 | 5 | 20 | 152 | 45 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091492 | 0 | 0 | 0.074773 | 0 | 0.084116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183616 | 0.067028 | 0 | 0.093564 | 0 | 0 | 0.194493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122747 | 0.112277 | 0 | 0.336321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194776 | 0 | 0 | 0.290498 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254854 | 0.101652 | 0.114894 | 0 | 0.06249 | 0.092225 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11771 | 0.124126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121649 | 0 | 0.060429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107437 | 0 | 0.097093 | 0.097307 | 0.092335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22093 | 0.119774 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07044 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111281 | 0.08762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181913 | 0 | 0 | 0.112086 | 0 | 0.084649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120273 | 0 | 0.103632 | 0 | 0 | 0.088378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127667 | 0.07305 | 0.14091 | 0 | 0.087292 | 0.064116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080049 | 0 | 0 | 0.156218 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
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