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suicidewatch | nissriiin | 2019/06/10 | empty it’s not that i’m sad—i feel this growing emptiness inside me. i’m numb. and it feels so lonely. i want someone to understand me and help me feel whole again but will that ever happen? | -0.910357 | 1.070863 | 1.388571 | 95.285 | 104 | 3.285714 | 15.714286 | 5.288315 | -0.673071 | 150 | 4 | 31 | 1 | 7 | 50 | 30 | 40 | 0.18 | 0.704 | 0.115 | -0.3806 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.545007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.317721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.374036 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.401137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ryliedogg1111 | 2019/06/10 | Tired of struggling I feel like I need to get this out. When I was in my 20s I tried to kill myself a couple of times, obviously I was unsuccessful. I always figured that the universe kept me alive so I could achieve some sort of greater purpose, and have some sort of success that my parents never had. The vast majorit... | 2.695835 | 4.147978 | 4.222412 | 87.053853 | 75.047059 | 6.882353 | 26.382353 | 7.510576 | 1.317824 | 1,613 | 59 | 339 | 20 | 34 | 538 | 204 | 425 | 0.178 | 0.736 | 0.087 | -0.9913 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 36 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 18 | 15 | 4 | 1 | 28 | 1 | 30 | 14 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 66 | 52 | 24 | 4 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 20 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 7 | 6 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 6 | 38 | 9 | 59 | 31 | 13 | 52 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 24 | 2 | 14 | 22 | 230 | 58 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159015 | 0 | 0.269444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149264 | 0 | 0 | 0.060994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068969 | 0 | 0.054676 | 0.099059 | 0 | 0.202107 | 0 | 0.158653 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09214 | 0 | 0.077263 | 0.094042 | 0 | 0 | 0.071613 | 0.297731 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092677 | 0 | 0.059241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084555 | 0 | 0.045352 | 0.064077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16584 | 0.046861 | 0 | 0.050975 | 0.07523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093616 | 0 | 0 | 0.198464 | 0 | 0.098586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.443471 | 0.04382 | 0 | 0.079201 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059871 | 0 | 0 | 0.097702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066506 | 0.069177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121557 | 0.068216 | 0.09544 | 0 | 0.099594 | 0 | 0 | 0.124364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071629 | 0.074988 | 0 | 0.093767 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104602 | 0.103089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121792 | 0.195121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063715 | 0 | 0 | 0.231038 |
suicidewatch | Qqqqpppzzzmmm | 2019/06/10 | Will I make it? Shits been rough the last 10 years.
I had a rough childhood; my mom has undiagnosed borderline personality disorder.
I got an engineering degree in undergrad.
I did all kinds of crazy shit. Committed crimes. Did drugs. Significantly hurt myself.
I went to medical school. The struggle was real. W... | 0.342803 | 2.757226 | 2.470223 | 90.640344 | 90.904762 | 5.453346 | 20.335306 | 7.005889 | 0.606862 | 2,172 | 73 | 456 | 35 | 76 | 728 | 275 | 567 | 0.162 | 0.72 | 0.118 | -0.9555 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 90 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 10 | 14 | 36 | 5 | 2 | 23 | 0 | 52 | 17 | 5 | 6 | 3 | 64 | 99 | 25 | 1 | 6 | 13 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 7 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 14 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 1 | 4 | 8 | 15 | 20 | 2 | 6 | 28 | 6 | 88 | 16 | 52 | 59 | 13 | 55 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 1 | 20 | 23 | 2 | 9 | 24 | 293 | 112 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044252 | 0 | 0 | 0.05634 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055973 | 0.069094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072385 | 0.064526 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068392 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10902 | 0.064236 | 0 | 0 | 0.072534 | 0.064778 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112109 | 0.065393 | 0 | 0.041801 | 0 | 0.106646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.032 | 0.045213 | 0 | 0 | 0.173532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048896 | 0 | 0.165327 | 0 | 0.035968 | 0 | 0.101234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056694 | 0.124968 | 0 | 0.269089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062859 | 0 | 0 | 0.338756 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251214 | 0.112507 | 0 | 0.065905 | 0.173907 | 0.154764 | 0 | 0 | 0.068763 | 0.064716 | 0.089404 | 0.061839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053146 | 0 | 0.069086 | 0.053805 | 0.05712 | 0.059885 | 0.042245 | 0 | 0 | 0.068939 | 0.070299 | 0.063756 | 0.191338 | 0 | 0.063903 | 0.074122 | 0 | 0.13453 | 0.046524 | 0.046927 | 0.048812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068535 | 0.060416 | 0.087752 | 0.055261 | 0 | 0 | 0.059828 | 0 | 0 | 0.064387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134629 | 0.063305 | 0.144071 | 0 | 0.065071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071497 | 0.129928 | 0.052352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048722 | 0 | 0.070846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047585 | 0.101737 | 0 | 0.058267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16221 | 0 | 0 | 0.110711 | 0.07274 | 0 | 0.060474 | 0.070315 | 0.214842 | 0 | 0.123646 | 0 | 0 | 0.054661 | 0 | 0.052219 | 0 | 0.050235 | 0.050766 | 0 | 0.113807 | 0.117337 | 0.057108 | 0 | 0.072778 | 0 | 0 | 0.046074 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081511 |
suicidewatch | jackie_n_wilson | 2019/06/10 | I envy the dead I go for drives when I'm sad or lonely. I can scream, cry and listen to music all by myself. I'm always praying for an accident. Maybe the road will freeze and I'll just go a little too fast around and corner... I think about the end often. I look at the patients I have who pass, and envy them. I imagin... | 1.003284 | 2.800966 | 2.633856 | 95.037941 | 80.944444 | 4.901961 | 16.143791 | 5.528933 | -0.750258 | 655 | 10 | 148 | 3 | 17 | 215 | 105 | 180 | 0.208 | 0.661 | 0.131 | -0.8957 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 25 | 7 | 2 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 22 | 5 | 27 | 22 | 4 | 28 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 100 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.345232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149952 | 0.174936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17121 | 0.241901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088454 | 0 | 0.192438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180226 | 0 | 0 | 0.173754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165426 | 0.169686 | 0 | 0.299656 | 0.142172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180455 | 0 | 0.141545 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108483 | 0 | 0 | 0.197444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114946 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299578 | 0 | 0 | 0.206166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | sirian345 | 2019/06/10 | I could really use one reason to live. Been sitting next to the train tracks drinking and smoking, watching trains go by, waiting until I can drink up the courage to jump in front of one of them. | 7.157895 | 6.470841 | 6.414737 | 82.913158 | 64.263158 | 8.652632 | 34.789474 | 7.168622 | 2.277326 | 154 | 6 | 30 | 1 | 2 | 47 | 32 | 38 | 0 | 0.916 | 0.084 | 0.4939 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 20 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.597284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.269192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.324217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.413155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195298 | 0.313442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263297 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MartBart115 | 2019/06/10 | Help. Thinking about how I want to do it. I want to at times then I think about how my family and my loved ones would feel if I did do it. | -2.1225 | -0.389698 | 0.43625 | 106.18375 | 94 | 4.45 | 11.125 | 5.985473 | -1.593025 | 104 | 1 | 30 | 1 | 4 | 35 | 22 | 32 | 0 | 0.723 | 0.277 | 0.802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 10 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 5 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 23 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.36296 | 0 | 0.194676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260897 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.493407 | 0 | 0 | 0.224506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.454186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273505 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Irenic_Style | 2019/06/10 | Everything hurts, I feel so weak I am loved. I live with my girlfriend and our three dogs. I have a family that loves me and checks on me often. I feel like I can’t be truthful with anyone. It’s like I put on a mask and hide how I really feel because I don’t want to hurt anyone. I have had depression for as long as I c... | 1.292333 | 3.084418 | 3.350148 | 90.279667 | 80 | 6.542222 | 22.281481 | 7.554174 | 0.818353 | 993 | 31 | 221 | 15 | 25 | 337 | 143 | 270 | 0.202 | 0.714 | 0.084 | -0.9873 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 33 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 17 | 16 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 19 | 7 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 47 | 44 | 20 | 5 | 6 | 8 | 2 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 43 | 6 | 39 | 40 | 4 | 35 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 19 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 146 | 48 | 5 | 0 | 0.219146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070746 | 0 | 0 | 0.129327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086887 | 0.071111 | 0 | 0.056375 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203168 | 0 | 0 | 0.159305 | 0 | 0.287937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208054 | 0 | 0 | 0.103139 | 0.122163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083114 | 0 | 0.174363 | 0.104065 | 0.280562 | 0.132135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0822 | 0 | 0 | 0.101648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100479 | 0 | 0 | 0.135542 | 0 | 0.163322 | 0.081841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100737 | 0.102724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108311 | 0 | 0.098291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064114 | 0 | 0.096621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092967 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059245 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209522 | 0.078977 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187188 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103523 | 0.065457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202315 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074331 | 0.080831 | 0 | 0.105758 | 0 | 0.061439 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053925 | 0 | 0.08766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178294 | 0 | 0.067326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059554 |
suicidewatch | SomethingAbout1925_ | 2019/06/10 | blah blah title some shit doesn't matter nobody will see this anyway so there's posts here that are like just emptying your shit into words to vocalize your troubles and im gonna do the same I guess. I live for my girlfriend. She's my everything. Shes saved my life multiple times and she's the only reason I'm alive and... | 1.387888 | 3.598448 | 2.689628 | 92.947205 | 81.910663 | 5.81521 | 20.301713 | 7.054809 | 0.372415 | 1,326 | 37 | 286 | 17 | 36 | 427 | 154 | 347 | 0.203 | 0.675 | 0.123 | -0.9816 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 23 | 26 | 11 | 3 | 9 | 1 | 24 | 16 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 68 | 50 | 31 | 1 | 2 | 18 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 58 | 8 | 26 | 43 | 12 | 23 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 34 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 15 | 187 | 70 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076698 | 0 | 0 | 0.099527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179343 | 0 | 0 | 0.070312 | 0 | 0 | 0.085291 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072304 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220103 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206384 | 0.05832 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.452819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08993 | 0 | 0 | 0.173803 | 0.073128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176358 | 0.085205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066543 | 0 | 0 | 0.088696 | 0.083477 | 0.345965 | 0.199412 | 0 | 0.144169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060011 | 0.060531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062087 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088402 | 0 | 0.056595 | 0.07128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078183 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081657 | 0 | 0 | 0.083934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139431 | 0 | 0.129838 | 0.08173 | 0 | 0.065052 | 0 | 0.085163 | 0 | 0.335186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091383 | 0 | 0.087011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054234 | 0.052308 | 0 | 0.129617 | 0.095203 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157385 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | PM_ME_UR_KALASHNIKOV | 2019/06/10 | Tonight's the night I posted yesterday when I was in a really sad and debilitating place, and it helped me a bit.
However, I don't feel that sad about having to do what I'm going to do tonight. I just feel relieved almost, to never not have to be enough for anyone anymore. I'll never have to worry about heartbreak, an... | 4.326857 | 5.018133 | 5.768571 | 80.421429 | 70.238095 | 8.666667 | 27.380952 | 8.841846 | 2.006238 | 407 | 13 | 81 | 7 | 7 | 138 | 68 | 105 | 0.099 | 0.777 | 0.124 | 0.1596 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 20 | 19 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 14 | 16 | 4 | 17 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 57 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.385051 | 0.135741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21194 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167226 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1855 | 0.174472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196317 | 0 | 0 | 0.212661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299451 | 0 | 0 | 0.182179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220963 | 0.124365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.394298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ItsMeWASTE | 2019/06/10 | I feel like I’m going to go insane and do something horrible but I think that killing myself is the smartest way to prevent that I feel like the things I’ve gone through are going to make me do something horrible, I have thoughts every day of committing mass shootings or killing innocents for no reason besides taking o... | 8.420104 | 6.760435 | 7.910208 | 76.347292 | 62.333333 | 10.825 | 38.520833 | 9.444779 | 3.49209 | 782 | 33 | 149 | 11 | 9 | 247 | 98 | 192 | 0.322 | 0.586 | 0.093 | -0.9965 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 15 | 5 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 30 | 44 | 11 | 4 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 22 | 4 | 20 | 33 | 4 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 108 | 41 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100118 | 0 | 0 | 0.080869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104752 | 0.141053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082822 | 0 | 0.105651 | 0.11982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126807 | 0.179165 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.356325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.416193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122523 | 0 | 0.110726 | 0 | 0 | 0.140285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251107 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135791 | 0 | 0.173866 | 0.10949 | 0 | 0 | 0.118539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166614 | 0.241044 | 0 | 0.398199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089077 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | naunga | 2019/06/10 | Disgusted by my body. I’m completely disgusted by my body. I wish I never had to eat, because it is so gross. Feeing food in my stomach is repulsive.
Having to eliminate is awful and vile.
Wanting and having sex is disgusting and uncomfortable.
I hate my body so much. I want to die so I can be rid of this horribl... | 1.314 | 3.749211 | 4.173929 | 80.722321 | 84.285714 | 8.642857 | 25.892857 | 9.188382 | 2.823429 | 273 | 12 | 53 | 9 | 8 | 97 | 45 | 70 | 0.418 | 0.537 | 0.046 | -0.9888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 15 | 6 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 8 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 37 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.727423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226554 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263961 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16047 | 0 | 0.168361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.251026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Sseatris | 2019/06/10 | I need help. I've been here before, and I can't seem to get free. Hello all.. I'm hurting. Something awful. I've lost everything once. And recently I let everything go because I felt like it was the right thing to do (I'm pretty certain it was). I'm trying so hard to deal with the after effects of dialysis and vision l... | 1.0441 | 3.054715 | 3.119 | 90.512 | 81.9 | 5.8 | 21.5 | 6.961327 | 0.55965 | 742 | 23 | 159 | 9 | 20 | 251 | 121 | 200 | 0.069 | 0.731 | 0.199 | 0.9798 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 24 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 23 | 44 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 4 | 12 | 12 | 19 | 29 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 12 | 96 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129471 | 0.091284 | 0 | 0.107432 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100385 | 0 | 0.079582 | 0.288365 | 0.111089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23466 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13202 | 0.18653 | 0.125349 | 0 | 0.11932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068207 | 0 | 0.074195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138973 | 0.116947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266993 | 0.092211 | 0.191341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142511 | 0 | 0.117827 | 0 | 0 | 0.264715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13699 | 0.139032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090507 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128903 | 0 | 0 | 0.111489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100504 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120193 | 0.149295 | 0 | 0.086732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088635 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16814 |
suicidewatch | kickassturtle | 2019/06/10 | I tried taking the first step towards getting better but it's getting too late I was raped 12 years ago. I still live with my rapist.
I have horrible ptsd and I'm getting nightmares and flashbacks and I'm so fucking anxious all the time
I want to kill myself, I feel horrible and life just isn't worth living.
I have nev... | 2.945032 | 4.785431 | 3.527822 | 90.6574 | 75.27907 | 5.931219 | 27.231149 | 6.574016 | 1.085722 | 507 | 20 | 103 | 4 | 11 | 159 | 83 | 129 | 0.298 | 0.631 | 0.071 | -0.9909 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 18 | 24 | 9 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 16 | 4 | 10 | 19 | 1 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 63 | 20 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109028 | 0 | 0 | 0.181123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081066 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148219 | 0.41882 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107463 | 0 | 0 | 0.318481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177378 | 0.166955 | 0 | 0 | 0.180855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113243 | 0 | 0 | 0.283142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11888 | 0.123654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.374826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120546 | 0 | 0.140132 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106514 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094565 | 0 | 0.128604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103245 |
suicidewatch | Dead_Memory | 2019/06/10 | Lost motivation Hello Everyone. Hope you are enjoying your night or day or wherever it is for you. Some great genuine people on here. I’m looking for help. I have lost motivation to get help. I feel like a shell of who I used to be. Feels like the old me died. I don’t have the guts to kill myself but I think about it e... | 1.093729 | 3.226239 | 3.178374 | 89.472143 | 82.5 | 6.862069 | 22.155172 | 7.990435 | 1.090738 | 1,052 | 35 | 233 | 21 | 29 | 356 | 144 | 280 | 0.242 | 0.568 | 0.19 | -0.9766 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 23 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 9 | 11 | 31 | 3 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 21 | 8 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 50 | 49 | 20 | 3 | 4 | 15 | 1 | 9 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 32 | 15 | 30 | 43 | 3 | 22 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 9 | 1 | 9 | 17 | 142 | 47 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076255 | 0 | 0 | 0.062321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153038 | 0.111731 | 0.101214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17514 | 0 | 0 | 0.086394 | 0 | 0.417042 | 0.327353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070804 | 0 | 0.09576 | 0 | 0.052083 | 0 | 0 | 0.101038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184281 | 0 | 0 | 0.091023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.202781 | 0.095433 | 0.050365 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129462 | 0.358181 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076958 | 0 | 0.200081 | 0 | 0.082712 | 0 | 0 | 0.092913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092534 | 0.107332 | 0 | 0 | 0.067369 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086002 | 0 | 0.087935 | 0 | 0.096165 | 0.097598 | 0 | 0.069699 | 0.195032 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166859 | 0.095605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070552 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060884 | 0.117444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079151 | 0 | 0 | 0.108108 | 0.072743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066718 | 0.093069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | darkespeon64 | 2019/06/10 | How do I tell my friends do I even tell them I just hung myself I only stopped because my cat stood outside my closet door crying I kind of want to tell my friends but i don't want to come off as attention seeking or add to their problems especailly one of them whos3 having a real hard tim3 with life rn | 1.713021 | 3.658575 | 2.95125 | 92.902083 | 79.3125 | 5.516667 | 24.729167 | 6.427356 | 0.680185 | 242 | 9 | 52 | 2 | 6 | 78 | 46 | 64 | 0.137 | 0.758 | 0.106 | -0.4497 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 8 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 14 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 33 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247204 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.347742 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152498 | 0.171159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.590104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | graygreybluebleu | 2019/06/10 | What's the damn point Why is it that so many people can just take the bad in life and not let it get them down? Death of pets, death of friends, death of family members, dull and endless situations, some people can just take it like it's a part of life and just keep up being happy.
My dog is old and has started gett... | 2.218469 | 3.445567 | 3.349221 | 93.74674 | 75.860987 | 6.352748 | 22.832543 | 6.742158 | 0.363543 | 1,636 | 45 | 383 | 14 | 35 | 528 | 207 | 446 | 0.091 | 0.798 | 0.111 | 0.9168 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 46 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 29 | 24 | 5 | 1 | 21 | 0 | 36 | 20 | 4 | 1 | 5 | 68 | 72 | 39 | 4 | 9 | 18 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 14 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 22 | 27 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 10 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 8 | 35 | 11 | 52 | 47 | 7 | 69 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 1 | 31 | 31 | 4 | 12 | 35 | 236 | 57 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076112 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170274 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165205 | 0 | 0 | 0.177925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077584 | 0.061089 | 0 | 0 | 0.091111 | 0.062389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065021 | 0 | 0.034874 | 0.049274 | 0.066224 | 0 | 0.063039 | 0 | 0.083401 | 0 | 0.159863 | 0.063763 | 0.108105 | 0 | 0.078397 | 0 | 0 | 0.076042 | 0 | 0.068293 | 0 | 0.073422 | 0 | 0 | 0.070785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04623 | 0 | 0.069184 | 0.068505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136888 | 0.122611 | 0.076307 | 0 | 0 | 0.056221 | 0 | 0.073031 | 0 | 0.070528 | 0.438452 | 0.101089 | 0.069128 | 0.060903 | 0.061038 | 0.115838 | 0 | 0 | 0.058637 | 0 | 0 | 0.046039 | 0.139853 | 0.138583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069507 | 0.073168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050702 | 0 | 0.053195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.217123 | 0 | 0 | 0.104913 | 0 | 0 | 0.15317 | 0.07469 | 0 | 0.143449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195602 | 0 | 0.066056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08837 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058902 | 0 | 0.054849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077527 | 0.069022 | 0 | 0 | 0.053098 | 0 | 0 | 0.048819 | 0 | 0.110162 | 0.057664 | 0 | 0.072104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045822 | 0.044194 | 0 | 0.054756 | 0.080436 | 0.317092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165975 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149594 | 0.100425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088831 |
suicidewatch | tssf_uzumaki | 2019/06/10 | I feel inescapably alone No one has the time or energy to help me right now. I wanna hurt myself but my parents and boyfriend will lose it with me if I start that tonight. They always think my freakouts are to be dramatic. But I just took panic attack medicine and I still can't stop the panic. I can't stop the feeling ... | 1.628673 | 3.468985 | 2.739141 | 94.829016 | 79.144928 | 5.517315 | 19.590389 | 6.339386 | -0.097603 | 774 | 18 | 173 | 6 | 19 | 247 | 109 | 207 | 0.197 | 0.613 | 0.19 | -0.7079 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 9 | 14 | 2 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 34 | 36 | 16 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 32 | 5 | 21 | 28 | 1 | 26 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 117 | 37 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125534 | 0 | 0 | 0.100854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169501 | 0.124191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275781 | 0.113878 | 0.093201 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101253 | 0 | 0.214707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183858 | 0.08659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063326 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246399 | 0 | 0.128973 | 0.426631 | 0.134586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077648 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119877 | 0 | 0.085791 | 0.12919 | 0.096796 | 0.202669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155329 | 0 | 0 | 0.070677 | 0 | 0 | 0.115818 | 0.134665 | 0.246875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | jaharris1027 | 2019/06/10 | Just maybe Loading up a huge shot of fent! This is my fourth attempt in a month or so. Let's hope this one finally does the trick!! | 0.22631 | 2.238593 | 1.535714 | 100.675952 | 85.071429 | 5.161905 | 20.047619 | 6.427356 | -0.153395 | 101 | 3 | 25 | 1 | 3 | 32 | 26 | 28 | 0.041 | 0.744 | 0.215 | 0.7314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 15 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.354218 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.443406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.402029 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.413905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.406647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.323084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | bkbrs | 2019/06/10 | tired of everything i don’t know what to do anymore. sure, i have friends who may care about me, but all i ever do is hurt everyone. i don’t deserve to be loved or treated like a good person. i don’t even know if i care about anyone or anything , my emotions are so fucking confusing and hard to label so i just opt to f... | 1.325403 | 2.993946 | 3.301964 | 91.245211 | 79.431894 | 6.718395 | 23.772733 | 7.662119 | 1.003289 | 1,098 | 38 | 250 | 17 | 27 | 371 | 137 | 301 | 0.236 | 0.609 | 0.155 | -0.986 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 30 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 26 | 28 | 3 | 2 | 10 | 1 | 31 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 66 | 60 | 31 | 1 | 7 | 18 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 41 | 14 | 26 | 48 | 4 | 22 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 16 | 7 | 3 | 10 | 14 | 171 | 55 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082251 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087295 | 0 | 0.134807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167179 | 0.058935 | 0 | 0.138721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087476 | 0.088061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07041 | 0.094811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167011 | 0.076242 | 0 | 0.161078 | 0.075751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255706 | 0 | 0.080928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130239 | 0.233764 | 0.044036 | 0 | 0.047902 | 0.141391 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075504 | 0 | 0.086502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.451151 | 0.190298 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059534 | 0.082356 | 0 | 0 | 0.074591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06196 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080875 | 0 | 0 | 0.089762 | 0 | 0.128207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220787 | 0 | 0 | 0.079678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090492 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211401 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079439 | 0 | 0 | 0.067746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055996 | 0 | 0 | 0.066914 | 0.098296 | 0.096875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078134 | 0 | 0 | 0.096925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | BeggingYouToKillMe | 2019/06/10 | Please someone kill me I have severe depression and severe anxiety and have since I was 13. I’m fucked up, broken, have always known I was different than everyone else, and have been broken and empty inside for as long as I can remember. I’m an untalented piece of shit with nothing to show for my life other than mistak... | 2.897748 | 4.472085 | 4.368649 | 85.708559 | 74.765766 | 7.275676 | 26.297297 | 7.984001 | 1.553665 | 856 | 31 | 175 | 13 | 18 | 285 | 129 | 222 | 0.322 | 0.597 | 0.081 | -0.9965 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 22 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 22 | 9 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 31 | 33 | 19 | 6 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 24 | 1 | 25 | 25 | 7 | 24 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 4 | 15 | 115 | 31 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103711 | 0 | 0.117156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089502 | 0 | 0.11603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075453 | 0 | 0.201539 | 0 | 0.364273 | 0.122237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097736 | 0 | 0.103625 | 0.120889 | 0 | 0.154551 | 0 | 0.098575 | 0.111796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108162 | 0 | 0.112234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124545 | 0.104806 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.25888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119637 | 0.165277 | 0 | 0 | 0.10331 | 0.207077 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11552 | 0 | 0.132535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264346 | 0.120096 | 0.193562 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068222 | 0.134471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075342 |
suicidewatch | DonHunt | 2019/06/10 | When will it stop I had a horrible heartache a year ago where my girlfriend broke up with me. All my friends were her friends first and they all ditched me when she left me. I had no one. I tried to kill myself twice, one of the times I went unconscious and woke up still slumped with the belt around my throat but too l... | 1.154637 | 3.222307 | 1.914912 | 98.982777 | 81.844037 | 5.798499 | 20.918265 | 6.980633 | 0.157305 | 408 | 12 | 98 | 5 | 11 | 126 | 71 | 109 | 0.191 | 0.618 | 0.191 | 0.2732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 15 | 7 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 22 | 6 | 12 | 9 | 2 | 21 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 72 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146903 | 0 | 0 | 0.400295 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098152 | 0.144857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.367696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187645 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.413768 | 0.144389 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1601 | 0.15584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188826 | 0 | 0.111217 |
suicidewatch | GuiltyAboutTheCard | 2019/06/10 | I want to die, but I don’t want God to hate me; I also don’t want to go to hell. There are many reasons i’m ready to kill myself. I don’t have much to live for. There are not many living things, humans, animals, that would care for my death. There are some who would care in the short term, but even those who care would... | 1.042204 | 3.015507 | 2.552234 | 94.773321 | 81.692308 | 5.363126 | 18.90232 | 6.427356 | -0.155246 | 673 | 16 | 153 | 6 | 18 | 219 | 95 | 182 | 0.247 | 0.529 | 0.224 | -0.9393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 10 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 18 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 27 | 37 | 10 | 5 | 11 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 4 | 19 | 30 | 4 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 8 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 96 | 31 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095956 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.48935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265502 | 0 | 0.131887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.243302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083186 | 0.10477 | 0.125364 | 0.263426 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286262 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.340949 | 0 | 0 | 0.07727 |
suicidewatch | SendNudes2menow | 2019/06/10 | I was actively an asshole in school so no one would be sad if I ever decided to end it. When I was in middle school I became very depressed and started overeating. I developed social anxiety as a result of the depression and fear of judgement for being overweight. So to hide my anxiety I actively started being an assho... | 4.521218 | 5.444262 | 5.695801 | 80.27524 | 69.940171 | 8.755983 | 29.154915 | 9.017664 | 2.387138 | 926 | 34 | 177 | 17 | 16 | 309 | 124 | 234 | 0.185 | 0.689 | 0.126 | -0.8839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 13 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 12 | 0 | 23 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 33 | 37 | 20 | 0 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 13 | 2 | 28 | 4 | 34 | 15 | 3 | 34 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 15 | 2 | 2 | 12 | 139 | 34 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058011 | 0.210202 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163929 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084287 | 0 | 0 | 0.062855 | 0.086081 | 0 | 0.090933 | 0.085527 | 0 | 0 | 0.107086 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104247 | 0 | 0 | 0.115073 | 0 | 0.147047 | 0.175955 | 0 | 0.09129 | 0.054084 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063786 | 0.100546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070563 | 0.073396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065975 | 0.083094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.674177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090933 | 0.105731 | 0.12922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07852 | 0.05613 | 0.151073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069281 | 0 | 0 | 0.202805 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | performancextv | 2019/06/10 | The water is consuming me I want to say i'm better after medication. I want to say im better after therapy. I want to say im better after groups. I want to say the hardwork i put in made me better but the water of my mind has dragged me down and everyday i get deeper like im being pulled down in the water and the light... | 6.709462 | 4.890478 | 7.738806 | 76.728014 | 65.780822 | 10.260665 | 30.446184 | 8.841846 | 2.252862 | 549 | 14 | 113 | 7 | 7 | 188 | 76 | 146 | 0.059 | 0.723 | 0.218 | 0.9666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 21 | 22 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 17 | 9 | 16 | 17 | 1 | 18 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 70 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.42236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249504 | 0 | 0.067852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141477 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.386883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129717 | 0.122084 | 0.084328 | 0.174983 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112969 | 0 | 0 | 0.119943 | 0 | 0 | 0.120272 | 0 | 0 | 0.241098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.272403 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089766 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136532 | 0 | 0.079317 | 0 | 0 | 0.094782 | 0.069617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | dbsknsja | 2019/06/10 | I’m so hopeless that I can’t do anything about it anymore. I’ve been suicidal almost every day for a couple of years. I have food and bad months. I’ve been on all kinds of meds that don’t do anything. I’ve overdosed and been sent to the psych ward. I want to die. Or I guess more accurately, I don’t want to be alive. I’... | -0.963602 | 1.009895 | 1.432387 | 99.516914 | 90.612903 | 4.274409 | 16.331183 | 5.683918 | -0.800394 | 430 | 10 | 107 | 3 | 15 | 145 | 69 | 124 | 0.147 | 0.715 | 0.139 | -0.4582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 17 | 30 | 9 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 12 | 5 | 10 | 21 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 63 | 19 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176136 | 0 | 0 | 0.438459 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196516 | 0 | 0.22908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184325 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179604 | 0.253761 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195651 | 0 | 0 | 0.189063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192967 | 0 | 0.125447 | 0.173537 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197278 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209511 | 0.140974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114371 |
suicidewatch | 06072019 | 2019/06/10 | Running out of options
I tried to kill myself a few days ago for the second time in my life. First time by OD this time by my wrists. Ive been battling back and forth whether or not i should take my life or not and one night i felt so betrayed by something small that my boyfriend did i decided to slit my wrists. The c... | 3.700388 | 4.560445 | 4.818605 | 86.044806 | 71.790698 | 8.420672 | 27.25323 | 8.735057 | 1.827166 | 1,476 | 50 | 316 | 26 | 27 | 486 | 199 | 387 | 0.197 | 0.703 | 0.1 | -0.992 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 30 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 19 | 27 | 12 | 1 | 14 | 2 | 42 | 12 | 4 | 8 | 5 | 62 | 65 | 26 | 3 | 6 | 16 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 20 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 11 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 12 | 18 | 0 | 4 | 21 | 7 | 55 | 9 | 42 | 36 | 7 | 42 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 19 | 14 | 4 | 5 | 28 | 217 | 75 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077534 | 0 | 0 | 0.063367 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095005 | 0.191446 | 0 | 0 | 0.097699 | 0.100696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120189 | 0 | 0.080257 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095357 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082531 | 0.096281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089039 | 0 | 0 | 0.087843 | 0 | 0.094231 | 0.133138 | 0.178938 | 0 | 0 | 0.07926 | 0 | 0.102169 | 0.071992 | 0.172289 | 0 | 0.089388 | 0 | 0.078156 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201304 | 0 | 0.092468 | 0 | 0.103091 | 0 | 0.10242 | 0 | 0 | 0.197331 | 0 | 0 | 0.131634 | 0.091047 | 0 | 0.082281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0841 | 0.088171 | 0.186598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22313 | 0 | 0.068499 | 0 | 0.071867 | 0.089995 | 0 | 0.087444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063142 | 0.283475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089242 | 0 | 0.100465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074102 | 0 | 0 | 0.074254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143471 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108191 | 0.123811 | 0.059707 | 0 | 0 | 0.217339 | 0 | 0 | 0.178078 | 0 | 0.253056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089824 | 0 | 0.135674 | 0 | 0 | 0.066193 | 0 | 0 | 0.120012 |
suicidewatch | HassouTobi | 2019/06/10 | Can't I just do it? I'm not even a good person I am actually a bad person. Lazy, entitled, unfocused, selfish, envious...I am honestly pretty bad. I do not hate myself though. Just saying the truth. All my troubles have relations to my pwm behaviour and actions. Whenever I ask for advice in other subreddits for other s... | 3.375553 | 4.976725 | 5.37809 | 78.84919 | 73.565217 | 9.076153 | 28.487484 | 9.573947 | 2.788977 | 543 | 22 | 104 | 14 | 11 | 188 | 88 | 138 | 0.207 | 0.655 | 0.137 | -0.8972 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 12 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 21 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 5 | 11 | 20 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 72 | 22 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.165468 | 0 | 0 | 0.165694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279071 | 0 | 0.158518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173142 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.283295 | 0 | 0.150182 | 0 | 0 | 0.111994 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156758 | 0 | 0 | 0.096366 | 0.142221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177927 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117553 | 0.444166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192999 | 0.108626 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144805 | 0 | 0.134843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12749 | 0 | 0.148205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheCyberLink | 2019/06/10 | I Came to this subreddit to help, yet here I am. I came to help other people through their suicidal thoughts, yet, the sheer wave of posts without reply is just so disheartening. I can't help but remember my own attempt at suicide, and although I survived, I can't help but feel sometimes that same feeling in the back o... | 7.611079 | 6.881316 | 7.577354 | 75.086667 | 63.37037 | 10.380952 | 38.544974 | 9.606745 | 3.666831 | 556 | 26 | 102 | 9 | 7 | 179 | 88 | 135 | 0.142 | 0.633 | 0.225 | 0.8741 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 22 | 21 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 16 | 4 | 18 | 17 | 3 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 70 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138478 | 0.113334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.337151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138947 | 0 | 0.223575 | 0.105296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113873 | 0 | 0.077005 | 0.14139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.395171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216022 | 0 | 0.130148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148822 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102182 | 0.128696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166965 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.483663 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094442 | 0 | 0.117011 | 0.085944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142079 | 0 | 0 | 0.149682 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | iambones28 | 2019/06/10 | Don’t really know how to title this but I think I am suicidal. I remember how I used to be, and I am none of that. I know some people would say change is good, but not the way I changed. I liked who I was. I was happy every day and rarely sad, not sad everyday and rarely happy. I wish I had no one now so I could end it... | 1.899824 | 2.949816 | 3.760413 | 91.190735 | 76.371429 | 7.013757 | 24.391534 | 7.526774 | 0.921807 | 1,252 | 40 | 293 | 16 | 27 | 424 | 161 | 350 | 0.161 | 0.607 | 0.232 | 0.9824 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 23 | 28 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 43 | 7 | 2 | 7 | 4 | 62 | 76 | 34 | 5 | 10 | 16 | 5 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 20 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 4 | 52 | 18 | 30 | 56 | 11 | 24 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 17 | 6 | 1 | 6 | 19 | 206 | 72 | 7 | 0.164147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081395 | 0.057388 | 0 | 0.135079 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083679 | 0 | 0.260468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065529 | 0 | 0 | 0.158792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255538 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08399 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072693 | 0 | 0 | 0.162626 | 0.07424 | 0.06915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082998 | 0.058633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06341 | 0.075876 | 0.08576 | 0 | 0.046644 | 0.206518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349475 | 0 | 0 | 0.084231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175723 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057971 | 0.160388 | 0 | 0.072472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089593 | 0 | 0.148149 | 0.07766 | 0.054785 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082711 | 0 | 0 | 0.096123 | 0 | 0 | 0.120667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078752 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182266 | 0 | 0 | 0.056899 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092973 | 0 | 0 | 0.065268 | 0.16434 | 0 | 0.065402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063184 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210357 | 0.080637 | 0 | 0.047858 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085441 | 0 | 0.070885 | 0 | 0 | 0.145227 | 0.130292 | 0.065834 | 0 | 0.073794 | 0 | 0.148117 | 0 | 0.09438 | 0.237348 | 0 | 0.05975 | 0 | 0 | 0.116605 | 0 | 0 | 0.052853 |
suicidewatch | LVDhelpme | 2019/06/10 | HELP my friend might be about to end it She text me saying that she’s going to die and she hasn’t opened my messages
She lives in a different country to me (Norway) and I don’t know any of her family or friends. What can I do to help? | 0.255 | 1.933744 | 2.308308 | 97.036692 | 82.846154 | 5.698462 | 18.092308 | 6.742158 | -0.224005 | 182 | 4 | 45 | 2 | 5 | 61 | 39 | 52 | 0.068 | 0.715 | 0.217 | 0.8192 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 2 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 31 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304046 | 0.30608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.259475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.276176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.45268 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.392729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.161003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.310784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232973 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | StevieDiicks | 2019/06/10 | Being a suicidal single mom fucking sucks I’m back in this dark hole that I keep ending up in and I hate it.
I hate it because I want to die and I can’t because I couldn’t do that to my son. I would feel bad for doing it in general but he makes it so I just absolutely can not bring myself to do it. I love him so much... | 1.723831 | 3.389526 | 3.487806 | 90.375929 | 78.248658 | 6.280618 | 21.783834 | 7.12719 | 0.535611 | 2,071 | 58 | 457 | 24 | 49 | 693 | 234 | 559 | 0.147 | 0.647 | 0.207 | 0.9907 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 46 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 36 | 44 | 7 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 37 | 9 | 1 | 8 | 3 | 86 | 104 | 37 | 2 | 11 | 15 | 6 | 13 | 9 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 37 | 21 | 0 | 7 | 19 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 11 | 17 | 1 | 2 | 10 | 16 | 79 | 27 | 65 | 84 | 11 | 57 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 30 | 25 | 3 | 6 | 35 | 302 | 116 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0.057828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147923 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273397 | 0.049478 | 0.252864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064037 | 0.066463 | 0 | 0.065568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051039 | 0 | 0.061501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049503 | 0.199973 | 0.157456 | 0.12246 | 0 | 0.156559 | 0.053603 | 0.049928 | 0.056624 | 0 | 0 | 0.055864 | 0 | 0.239703 | 0.127003 | 0.056897 | 0 | 0.054161 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045783 | 0.054784 | 0.06192 | 0.056846 | 0.033678 | 0.14911 | 0 | 0 | 0.06528 | 0 | 0 | 0.063082 | 0.159252 | 0.117011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070222 | 0.03972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063437 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31603 | 0 | 0 | 0.032567 | 0 | 0 | 0.125492 | 0.064385 | 0 | 0.083712 | 0.260556 | 0 | 0.104653 | 0 | 0.049762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160449 | 0 | 0.158222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062864 | 0.059834 | 0.069403 | 0 | 0.062982 | 0.130685 | 0.043939 | 0.045704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040155 | 0.090137 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056569 | 0.164329 | 0 | 0.061912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066383 | 0 | 0.059275 | 0 | 0.037962 | 0.060928 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094249 | 0 | 0.059973 | 0 | 0 | 0.06182 | 0 | 0 | 0.049019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08911 | 0 | 0 | 0.054557 | 0 | 0 | 0.039369 | 0.03797 | 0.058221 | 0.094089 | 0.034554 | 0.068109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080465 | 0 | 0.057887 | 0.06169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05328 | 0 | 0.053472 | 0.06616 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042096 | 0 | 0 | 0.076321 |
suicidewatch | MsStapler | 2019/06/10 | Hello people hi, im too much of a pussy to kill myself so I don't think this is even a valid place to be but anyway. I've recently started with a new therapist after my last two quit. I was feeling better because of school ending but everytime I have an appointment I lose all my emotions. I just get anxious and easily ... | 4.69049 | 5.866275 | 5.953698 | 77.647022 | 69.748899 | 9.199229 | 29.165474 | 9.516145 | 2.638119 | 917 | 34 | 174 | 20 | 16 | 308 | 133 | 227 | 0.266 | 0.535 | 0.199 | -0.98 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 14 | 21 | 4 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 18 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 47 | 40 | 18 | 2 | 9 | 17 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 26 | 10 | 22 | 31 | 6 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 2 | 4 | 15 | 126 | 36 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0.207082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081168 | 0.119866 | 0 | 0.07419 | 0 | 0.174627 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093839 | 0 | 0.117856 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119351 | 0.093976 | 0.109633 | 0 | 0.07008 | 0.095976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.321893 | 0.1516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112948 | 0 | 0.104755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234774 | 0 | 0 | 0.086488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155509 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0891 | 0.118702 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141649 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112558 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077998 | 0.078674 | 0 | 0.102475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101809 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114899 | 0 | 0.220675 | 0 | 0.110855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112853 | 0 | 0 | 0.067972 | 0 | 0.104764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107382 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104938 | 0 | 0.0751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123194 | 0.07049 | 0.067986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108128 | 0.150745 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Throwawayzing1 | 2019/06/10 | I got blackout drunk and tried to kill myself last night. I've been going through a major depressive episode for probably the last year. I basically walked away from many things and comittments because at some point my brain broke.
Anyway I thought my crisis period was over months ago and even though I have constant ... | 1.84114 | 4.345162 | 2.859766 | 90.589474 | 82.479532 | 5.354386 | 23.912281 | 6.718309 | 0.821467 | 1,363 | 51 | 271 | 15 | 38 | 433 | 166 | 342 | 0.19 | 0.745 | 0.065 | -0.9906 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 12 | 3 | 3 | 13 | 0 | 26 | 10 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 51 | 64 | 26 | 4 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 17 | 2 | 3 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 6 | 52 | 3 | 38 | 37 | 4 | 53 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 18 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 183 | 66 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167688 | 0 | 0 | 0.176979 | 0 | 0 | 0.114828 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10178 | 0.105636 | 0.075199 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095245 | 0.067285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072767 | 0 | 0.049207 | 0 | 0.053527 | 0 | 0.075328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06313 | 0 | 0.094475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208402 | 0 | 0.258807 | 0.230319 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09631 | 0 | 0.046014 | 0 | 0 | 0.166701 | 0.079091 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08912 | 0 | 0.095488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094881 | 0.094916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075177 | 0 | 0.069236 | 0.139673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106693 | 0 | 0 | 0.074899 | 0.18859 | 0 | 0.075053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105867 | 0 | 0 | 0.159604 | 0.435047 | 0 | 0 | 0.066664 | 0 | 0.075216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062572 | 0 | 0.092536 | 0.149544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104642 | 0.191835 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060652 |
suicidewatch | goldclaws | 2019/06/10 | Sometimes I wonder if I'm strong enough to keep going I'm almost 45, divorced and alone, and sometimes I wonder if I can keep going. I sit here at night and listen to my daughter, who is 17, talk to her friends on the phone and even though I can't hear what she's saying, she sounds happy and so alive. I remember when... | 3.356838 | 3.22131 | 4.583041 | 90.999029 | 72.092784 | 7.291409 | 22.352234 | 6.427356 | 0.264974 | 344 | 6 | 82 | 2 | 6 | 114 | 60 | 97 | 0.12 | 0.723 | 0.157 | 0.6993 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 21 | 19 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 12 | 4 | 7 | 17 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 49 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.333453 | 0.344889 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17204 | 0 | 0.109972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128638 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.44398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.188613 | 0 | 0 | 0.132408 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.329347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156925 | 0 | 0 | 0.133827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.361126 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | scb5889 | 2019/06/10 | My words to no one as if it's a script I hate being such a complainer. I wish I wasn't this way or could figure out how to be different. I don't wanna die I really don't but I'm so tired. Just plain exhausted and I'm ready this is it. Please don't think I'm an attention whore or something. I just don't know what to do ... | -1.310854 | 0.707941 | 1.143292 | 99.811374 | 95.275168 | 4.518055 | 13.979702 | 6.219706 | -0.841151 | 1,043 | 20 | 258 | 12 | 41 | 351 | 136 | 298 | 0.227 | 0.622 | 0.151 | -0.9791 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 30 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 16 | 20 | 4 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 28 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 56 | 56 | 25 | 2 | 9 | 17 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 12 | 13 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 4 | 29 | 7 | 30 | 40 | 2 | 25 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 11 | 0 | 7 | 8 | 153 | 45 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098119 | 0 | 0 | 0.162834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205363 | 0.103369 | 0 | 0 | 0.173162 | 0.101247 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.262888 | 0.102229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100052 | 0.070681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168685 | 0.165968 | 0.079129 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106869 | 0 | 0 | 0.08794 | 0 | 0 | 0.108747 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139765 | 0.048336 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110686 | 0.108002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066042 | 0 | 0.099396 | 0.323316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134085 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137182 | 0 | 0 | 0.108604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198919 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253476 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083829 | 0.076167 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12679 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067172 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.227547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108173 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SmoothError | 2019/06/10 | This is the closest I've come to wanting to end my life. I'm 24, accomplished nothing, no college, work manual labor 60 hours a week, my father was a lazy alcoholic and drug addict who died when I was in 6th grade, his side of the family is all fucked up. I'm sick of seeing my mother work as hard as she does. I feel gu... | 2.845339 | 3.691299 | 3.898578 | 91.898805 | 73.790419 | 6.764271 | 19.305888 | 6.816662 | -0.011127 | 614 | 9 | 140 | 5 | 12 | 199 | 106 | 167 | 0.155 | 0.737 | 0.107 | -0.695 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 7 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 26 | 9 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 22 | 5 | 20 | 19 | 1 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 25 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 85 | 31 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164601 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.26212 | 0 | 0 | 0.136219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145197 | 0 | 0.077877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13101 | 0 | 0 | 0.237992 | 0.14239 | 0.080469 | 0 | 0.087533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151679 | 0.177719 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108789 | 0.075247 | 0 | 0.136003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131533 | 0.146509 | 0.244967 | 0 | 0 | 0.245469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204649 | 0 | 0 | 0.122275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.20914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181691 | 0.244509 | 0.123546 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.224258 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099184 |
suicidewatch | dollbitch69 | 2019/06/10 | I feel like my only option is to die. I don’t think I’m supposed to be a person. I’ve been struggling with suicidal thoughts for a while now but it’s been really bad the last couple months. I have a plan I guess I’m just waiting for something to finally push me there.
I have BPD along with extreme anxiety and depressio... | 0.833001 | 2.651178 | 2.870588 | 93.026381 | 81.59887 | 6.198604 | 21.7112 | 7.285733 | 0.599519 | 641 | 20 | 147 | 9 | 17 | 216 | 96 | 177 | 0.253 | 0.683 | 0.064 | -0.9863 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 17 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 25 | 37 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 24 | 4 | 16 | 31 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 85 | 29 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098787 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189001 | 0.139554 | 0.245018 | 0 | 0 | 0.101655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106397 | 0 | 0.128205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111021 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187382 | 0.26475 | 0 | 0.135321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.203667 | 0.100694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174506 | 0.241403 | 0 | 0.218159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082457 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131376 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09395 | 0 | 0 | 0.137166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107862 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118308 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0951 | 0 | 0.138282 | 0.087435 | 0 | 0.098651 | 0 | 0 | 0.129141 | 0 | 0.135122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158307 | 0 | 0.098069 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079549 |
suicidewatch | jeffyjoo | 2019/06/10 | I feel like I'm ready to leave Its been a 15 year battle that I'm tired of. There's nothing left to fight for, I've spent 8 days in a psych ward in isolation with nothing to do. All i did was stare out the window i was given barely any food and suffered neglect, losing 20 pounds in those 8 days, and i just suffered in... | 5.770133 | 4.322858 | 6.476179 | 83.829679 | 67.409639 | 9.543316 | 30.364314 | 8.26906 | 1.902178 | 1,526 | 44 | 342 | 17 | 21 | 505 | 187 | 415 | 0.182 | 0.687 | 0.132 | -0.9507 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 42 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 19 | 27 | 4 | 2 | 17 | 0 | 29 | 12 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 56 | 61 | 28 | 1 | 9 | 19 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 17 | 13 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 12 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 12 | 34 | 13 | 58 | 46 | 8 | 48 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 22 | 32 | 1 | 11 | 13 | 207 | 51 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058013 | 0.127063 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061449 | 0 | 0.077177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141679 | 0 | 0 | 0.059851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089618 | 0 | 0.059843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045891 | 0 | 0.05854 | 0 | 0.124888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105393 | 0.148909 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084015 | 0 | 0.05368 | 0 | 0.0363 | 0 | 0.078974 | 0.058276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207028 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072519 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076369 | 0 | 0 | 0.147138 | 0.452941 | 0 | 0.147227 | 0.101833 | 0 | 0.061352 | 0 | 0.058346 | 0.07773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.046378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.466675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105685 | 0 | 0 | 0.077149 | 0 | 0 | 0.048169 | 0.060667 | 0 | 0 | 0.131362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158167 | 0.044511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16576 | 0 | 0.210952 | 0.055367 | 0 | 0 | 0.078493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053489 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079538 | 0.076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080672 | 0.046159 | 0.08904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.319428 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044743 |
suicidewatch | Cagan_h35 | 2019/06/10 | Probably gonna end it all I have 8 pills of NSAIDs, enough to kill me. I just dont want it to be painful, just gonna swallow it all, then, go to sleep wishing never to wake up. | 4.3485 | 2.417333 | 5.485 | 91.36 | 70.5 | 9 | 30 | 7.168622 | 1.30675 | 134 | 4 | 36 | 1 | 2 | 45 | 30 | 40 | 0.217 | 0.737 | 0.047 | -0.7859 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 22 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.364579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.275521 | 0.321425 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.34416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239921 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.331007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.335393 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.311301 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.357722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Mamillan | 2019/06/10 | What is your reason for living? Been depressed since I was 12 and suicidal since 13. Tried to end it all once back in November but couldn't go through, just too scared. Since then I got diagnosed with deppression and I can't stop thinking about ending it all. The only thing that has kept me from killing myself is the f... | 4.294872 | 5.662271 | 4.60812 | 86.196842 | 70.894737 | 8.37594 | 26.203008 | 8.841846 | 1.807827 | 382 | 12 | 77 | 7 | 7 | 120 | 70 | 95 | 0.229 | 0.721 | 0.05 | -0.9713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 15 | 22 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 10 | 17 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 52 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147301 | 0 | 0 | 0.121157 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135709 | 0.159924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.279109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177303 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179094 | 0 | 0.126018 | 0 | 0.173574 | 0 | 0.139333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2801 | 0.174321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076978 | 0 | 0.278263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167571 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1678 | 0 | 0.119834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162002 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157749 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.391015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104678 | 0.10096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142177 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Zandrae | 2019/06/10 | So Depressed it Physically Hurts I've been breaking down multiple times a day every day since about April 9th.
My hopes and dreams are shattered, broken, and dead. I really have nothing left and no hope.
The only thing keeping me going is a pair of internet friends.
The emotional pain is so severe and so profound... | 5.06447 | 6.102184 | 5.818636 | 79.468788 | 68.772727 | 9.048485 | 31.143939 | 9.299571 | 2.745335 | 716 | 29 | 135 | 14 | 12 | 234 | 120 | 176 | 0.114 | 0.769 | 0.117 | -0.6613 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 15 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 26 | 28 | 17 | 1 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 21 | 4 | 19 | 24 | 2 | 22 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 10 | 0 | 5 | 8 | 95 | 28 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0.161215 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135949 | 0.147067 | 0.154444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131902 | 0 | 0 | 0.213086 | 0 | 0.14229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185832 | 0.146322 | 0 | 0 | 0.218231 | 0 | 0.139192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140523 | 0 | 0 | 0.127636 | 0 | 0.172625 | 0 | 0.187779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110733 | 0 | 0 | 0.32817 | 0 | 0 | 0.176854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.146841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.179495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121444 | 0 | 0 | 0.159555 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125645 | 0.175789 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105834 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131377 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186634 | 0 | 0.136659 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127182 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124213 | 0 | 0.144396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109754 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136311 | 0.097442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117356 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | RustyCurls | 2019/06/10 | I’ve attempted suicide. Should I tell anyone? I can’t believe this is my first Reddit post despite reading many threads (not necessarily related to suicide) for so long. But I’m tired. I’m really, really tired. I’ve had it. I tried to take my own life two days ago and I can’t stop thinking about it.
I talked to a frie... | 2.711595 | 4.542258 | 3.919414 | 87.638691 | 75.910112 | 6.815763 | 25.091842 | 7.665016 | 1.256929 | 2,079 | 72 | 426 | 29 | 46 | 678 | 254 | 534 | 0.159 | 0.737 | 0.103 | -0.973 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 59 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 27 | 32 | 3 | 2 | 22 | 1 | 36 | 17 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 78 | 75 | 40 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 22 | 32 | 1 | 3 | 17 | 2 | 0 | 4 | 11 | 16 | 2 | 4 | 20 | 7 | 73 | 15 | 65 | 47 | 12 | 64 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 5 | 56 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 42 | 285 | 95 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0.140185 | 0 | 0 | 0.070188 | 0.19101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.05744 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075316 | 0.054947 | 0 | 0 | 0.150668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067148 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061119 | 0.080924 | 0.075378 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080182 | 0 | 0 | 0.073232 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114695 | 0 | 0.078898 | 0.046322 | 0 | 0.123728 | 0 | 0.149089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129942 | 0 | 0 | 0.064553 | 0 | 0 | 0.080825 | 0.145271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061096 | 0 | 0 | 0.277465 | 0 | 0 | 0.068903 | 0.040821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048144 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081083 | 0 | 0 | 0.071277 | 0.063843 | 0 | 0 | 0.118422 | 0.058548 | 0.081023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1522 | 0 | 0.071989 | 0 | 0.063564 | 0 | 0.080356 | 0.078407 | 0 | 0.324131 | 0 | 0 | 0.072821 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057331 | 0 | 0 | 0.053258 | 0.110794 | 0.138741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.048672 | 0 | 0.076429 | 0 | 0.079755 | 0.077781 | 0 | 0.149386 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06879 | 0 | 0.077441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071846 | 0 | 0.092028 | 0.07385 | 0.07092 | 0 | 0 | 0.061339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057236 | 0 | 0.074931 | 0 | 0 | 0.059416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071038 | 0 | 0 | 0.076558 | 0.114722 | 0.06005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054005 | 0.057731 | 0.125559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047718 | 0.184094 | 0.141138 | 0 | 0.083765 | 0.165108 | 0 | 0.2059 | 0 | 0.097531 | 0.078127 | 0.070164 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059264 | 0.042365 | 0.057013 | 0 | 0 | 0.064581 | 0.066584 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138762 |
suicidewatch | Novaleah88 | 2019/06/10 | I need help I want to give up. I have a pretty unknown medical condition called dysautonomia, I don't look sick but I am, all the time, every day, every hour. The symptoms are random, so I never know if I will be well enough to even walk an hour from now. I'm tired all the time, but not just tired, it's like an exhaus... | 3.76522 | 4.404696 | 4.776863 | 87.213419 | 71.481928 | 7.856282 | 24.94191 | 7.957252 | 1.153504 | 1,567 | 42 | 342 | 20 | 28 | 513 | 210 | 415 | 0.208 | 0.711 | 0.082 | -0.9966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 43 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 23 | 17 | 4 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 32 | 24 | 9 | 4 | 5 | 64 | 66 | 27 | 3 | 11 | 13 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 16 | 21 | 4 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 15 | 12 | 1 | 1 | 17 | 4 | 53 | 5 | 45 | 45 | 6 | 51 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 21 | 17 | 2 | 5 | 26 | 214 | 69 | 1 | 0 | 0.09403 | 0.077445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175155 | 0 | 0.066035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065308 | 0.070649 | 0 | 0.090285 | 0 | 0.122048 | 0 | 0.193512 | 0 | 0.067531 | 0 | 0 | 0.070189 | 0 | 0.088153 | 0 | 0 | 0.081037 | 0 | 0 | 0.081526 | 0.083954 | 0.068363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102363 | 0 | 0.068354 | 0.08055 | 0.16473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24362 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082002 | 0 | 0.104835 | 0 | 0.200597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073368 | 0.041463 | 0.076131 | 0 | 0 | 0.063473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053194 | 0 | 0 | 0.078824 | 0.234466 | 0.183145 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082833 | 0 | 0.07054 | 0 | 0 | 0.130845 | 0.06469 | 0 | 0.168065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.038772 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066644 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075094 | 0.052974 | 0.08046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185895 | 0 | 0 | 0.05834 | 0.058846 | 0.122417 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053777 | 0 | 0.084446 | 0.093114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080739 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152523 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158838 | 0 | 0.067243 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082487 | 0 | 0.063788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052724 | 0.152555 | 0 | 0.063004 | 0.185105 | 0.273643 | 0 | 0.151667 | 0.088174 | 0.107763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087406 | 0.065482 | 0.187238 | 0 | 0.063659 | 0 | 0.071356 | 0.073569 | 0 | 0 | 0.091262 | 0.076502 | 0 | 0.057776 | 0 | 0 | 0.112752 | 0 | 0 | 0.051106 |
suicidewatch | Kaiphillipzzz | 2018/11/25 | im embarassed that i want to kill myself im a narcissist and because I have put on an egotistical front for years i can't speak to my close friends or girlfriend about it without feeling weak and embarrassed but I need somebody to talk to | 2.40625 | 4.881585 | 3.395667 | 87.816 | 79.833333 | 6.34 | 30.433333 | 7.554174 | 2.052828 | 194 | 10 | 38 | 3 | 5 | 62 | 38 | 48 | 0.16 | 0.731 | 0.109 | -0.3252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 24 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183686 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.650969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.333373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.302916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194044 |
suicidewatch | Furudohara | 2018/11/25 | I don't even know what to do anymore My life has went downhill since February 2018. Yeah, 9 months from now. Back in the day, I used to be a happy go lucky guy, who spent his time joking about everything and making a lot of friends in order to have fun. But even with that point of view, I realized I never truly experie... | 2.863163 | 4.441352 | 3.677247 | 90.613931 | 74.865724 | 6.759195 | 24.671839 | 7.423996 | 0.959849 | 1,090 | 35 | 235 | 13 | 23 | 347 | 152 | 283 | 0.137 | 0.64 | 0.223 | 0.9748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 41 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 13 | 29 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 21 | 6 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 46 | 42 | 14 | 4 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 8 | 6 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 10 | 39 | 21 | 35 | 28 | 5 | 50 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 13 | 13 | 1 | 4 | 38 | 150 | 53 | 0 | 0.077853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062259 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07721 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059864 | 0.065004 | 0 | 0 | 0.066247 | 0 | 0.245107 | 0 | 0 | 0.172955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150627 | 0 | 0.067055 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068955 | 0 | 0 | 0.102843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069969 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31492 | 0.33371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240597 | 0 | 0.040675 | 0 | 0.044246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077087 | 0.068845 | 0.165753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258399 | 0 | 0.085572 | 0.063461 | 0 | 0 | 0.084588 | 0 | 0.05499 | 0.228211 | 0 | 0.068746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066188 | 0.210797 | 0 | 0.051968 | 0 | 0.078214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08259 | 0 | 0 | 0.248567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.248734 | 0.158266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064401 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051722 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136191 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06724 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061796 | 0.062449 | 0 | 0 | 0.072171 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Namelesto | 2018/11/25 | Confused Sometimes it's normal, I feel like a normal human being with a will to keep go on with my life
But other time there is this burning feeling I have inside my that I can relieve with pain..
Sometimes life is okay and tolerable but sometimes I wanna rip my chest open because I can't stand nothing in my everyday... | 3.998675 | 5.159116 | 4.898822 | 84.621546 | 71.371134 | 6.367599 | 29.32106 | 6.182691 | 1.385626 | 381 | 15 | 73 | 2 | 7 | 124 | 64 | 97 | 0.019 | 0.836 | 0.146 | 0.8054 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 19 | 5 | 1 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 4 | 10 | 14 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 50 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120015 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147484 | 0.104189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139905 | 0.16577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129631 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.309037 | 0.142502 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285788 | 0.139939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155186 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.721206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085041 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103602 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | nviix | 2018/11/25 | Question I juste came out of a long period of depression, i went to psychologist for 6 month, now i feel a lot better but i keep being so obsessed with sadness, i love being sad but i don't feel depressed it's like i am not depressed but deeply sad for no reason. Why do i love sadnesse so badly ? (Sorry for my english ... | 1.863043 | 3.526704 | 4.11529 | 86.040761 | 77.84058 | 6.33913 | 24.543478 | 7.168622 | 1.069104 | 257 | 9 | 53 | 3 | 6 | 89 | 49 | 69 | 0.276 | 0.465 | 0.259 | -0.1622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 13 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 14 | 12 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 4 | 9 | 8 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 37 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18528 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.239605 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.54131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102348 | 0 | 0 | 0.185395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178104 | 0.378152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167216 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234681 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215394 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.166286 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194203 | 0.189035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | cclouztr | 2018/11/25 | goodbye cruel world im going to leave this shithole soon. i had a good time on earth until this one motherfucker did what he did. i lost everything. there is just a shadow left of me. drugs and alcohol is now my whole life. i cant take it anymore. im sorry | -0.610556 | 1.593121 | 2.120278 | 91.88375 | 96.407407 | 4.922222 | 17.861111 | 6.627428 | 0.165822 | 200 | 6 | 43 | 3 | 8 | 69 | 45 | 54 | 0.235 | 0.713 | 0.052 | -0.8519 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 28 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234878 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.274654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.212853 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134599 | 0.198647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.511647 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.250775 | 0.257323 | 0 | 0.167284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258534 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178071 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AliceLostInLaLaLand | 2018/11/25 | Where can I buy Nembutal? I’m tired of life. I’m tired of having no family. No friends. No one. I’m tired of being crazy. I’m tired of being toxic and awful. I’m tired of hurting. I’m tired of this life. I need an out and I’m scared of pain. I need Nembutal. | -3.324887 | -2.285492 | 0.5275 | 100.037804 | 116.79661 | 4.000565 | 11.696328 | 5.985473 | -0.960899 | 196 | 4 | 50 | 3 | 12 | 71 | 26 | 59 | 0.508 | 0.451 | 0.041 | -0.9851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 13 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 8 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196465 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089772 | 0 | 0.140968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.9136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | novo15 | 2018/11/25 | What if? I'm seriously planning suicide next week. One of the things that additionally motivate me is this-what if I continue to live, and develop love towards life, I still can (involuntary) die from numerous things, except it will be against my will and probably in the worst possible moment. I have experiences of bei... | 6.8568 | 8.176453 | 7.724 | 66.402 | 64.866667 | 11.866667 | 37.666667 | 11.602472 | 5.012867 | 331 | 17 | 55 | 11 | 5 | 111 | 58 | 75 | 0.222 | 0.579 | 0.199 | -0.4874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 12 | 6 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 45 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.480328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.152842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.226361 | 0 | 0 | 0.117006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.256018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16345 | 0 | 0 | 0.204337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246104 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156807 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260877 | 0 | 0 | 0.249496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184802 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.307473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185621 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | gi18gat | 2018/11/25 | Am I the only one? Am I the only one feeling all this up and down? Like I woke up and it is sunny outside, so then I planned to make this day full of joy. Then I feel like I do not deserve to be alive and I just see a big wall of brick in front of me, and I can't jump! I just want to cry and I'm thinking of why everyth... | 2.056787 | 2.746097 | 3.666446 | 93.414649 | 75.506024 | 6.738153 | 23.471888 | 6.816662 | 0.473656 | 584 | 16 | 142 | 5 | 12 | 195 | 92 | 166 | 0.058 | 0.798 | 0.144 | 0.9282 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 22 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 32 | 31 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 2 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 6 | 19 | 5 | 23 | 27 | 3 | 20 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 97 | 31 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160832 | 0.094426 | 0.452847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.29613 | 0.3138 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258951 | 0 | 0.13116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149721 | 0.103418 | 0.214595 | 0 | 0.129288 | 0.129574 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198431 | 0.222713 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220174 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093818 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120809 | 0.08636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264236 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | MarieTjeDW | 2018/11/25 | Not sure if I want to die or just have a different life Honestly. I know why you would say “just get help”. I truly do. I used to do the same.
But, when literally everything in life has gone wrong or bad, what do you do?
I’m not sure if I want to die or have a different life?
| -1.089742 | 0.756871 | 1.929883 | 96.747377 | 89.491803 | 6.764403 | 16.911007 | 7.957252 | 0.282848 | 207 | 5 | 55 | 5 | 7 | 73 | 37 | 61 | 0.295 | 0.586 | 0.12 | -0.8892 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 18 | 15 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 4 | 13 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 35 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.419083 | 0.421888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181456 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13533 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.427827 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16056 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.380579 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174378 | 0 | 0 | 0.238173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143425 | 0.220747 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ThrowAway55641235 | 2018/11/25 | Lost a friend that never wants to talk to me again I have always thought about suicide but have never felt like I wanted to do it. My dad committed suicide 5 years ago and I have always told myself I dont want to end up like him but recently I feel like my emotions have been going down hill. I have been having to take ... | 1.909713 | 3.629218 | 3.040447 | 93.548936 | 77.878049 | 5.336043 | 21.876694 | 5.822114 | 0.095222 | 1,536 | 43 | 335 | 8 | 36 | 493 | 171 | 410 | 0.124 | 0.708 | 0.168 | 0.9699 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 27 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 26 | 3 | 0 | 19 | 2 | 39 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 6 | 66 | 71 | 27 | 3 | 7 | 6 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 19 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 39 | 9 | 70 | 20 | 38 | 28 | 8 | 53 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 82 | 11 | 0 | 7 | 34 | 231 | 89 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175864 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052885 | 0.110053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123647 | 0.075234 | 0 | 0.101701 | 0 | 0.120939 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067527 | 0 | 0.067425 | 0 | 0 | 0.056966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105601 | 0.219518 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069093 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077505 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074389 | 0.058573 | 0.068331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066876 | 0.047244 | 0.126992 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145019 | 0.357649 | 0 | 0.034551 | 0 | 0.187919 | 0 | 0 | 0.14582 | 0 | 0.06548 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070294 | 0 | 0.078366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071433 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067624 | 0 | 0.096925 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07219 | 0.056222 | 0 | 0.12515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158356 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127096 | 0.135988 | 0.065296 | 0 | 0 | 0.056476 | 0.125812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151409 | 0.21701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.049722 | 0.318922 | 0.231206 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157502 | 0 | 0 | 0.125369 | 0.126382 | 0 | 0.044899 | 0 | 0.0646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117017 | 0 | 0.159139 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.042586 |
suicidewatch | throwaway2748294 | 2018/11/25 | For D. I'm sure you won't see this, since this is one of my throwaways. But if I won't see tomorrow, maybe one day you'll venture here and maybe recognise yourself.
I lied to you. Yesterday was a suicide attempt. Sure, it was an accident, but at first I had no intentions to save myself. I thought I should finally do th... | 1.104931 | 3.35523 | 2.940245 | 90.48119 | 83.375 | 5.97799 | 22.615431 | 7.273562 | 0.894595 | 1,338 | 47 | 281 | 20 | 38 | 445 | 168 | 352 | 0.206 | 0.657 | 0.136 | -0.9688 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 61 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 20 | 2 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 28 | 9 | 2 | 4 | 6 | 41 | 68 | 18 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 19 | 7 | 57 | 13 | 28 | 37 | 4 | 31 | 1 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 26 | 12 | 0 | 6 | 16 | 171 | 70 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0.060444 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06415 | 0 | 0 | 0.30923 | 0 | 0 | 0.042121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052706 | 0 | 0 | 0.05478 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131047 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079891 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04091 | 0 | 0 | 0.059186 | 0.111334 | 0 | 0.116781 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067851 | 0 | 0.105371 | 0 | 0 | 0.047854 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.035201 | 0.103903 | 0.049538 | 0 | 0.068233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.063567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190011 | 0.174998 | 0 | 0 | 0.054693 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055903 | 0.175825 | 0 | 0 | 0.186679 | 0.06747 | 0 | 0 | 0.06242 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045532 | 0 | 0.095543 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125915 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.06588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062686 | 0.148072 | 0.056387 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.051237 | 0 | 0.061984 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.693358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067751 | 0 | 0.116754 | 0 | 0.046571 | 0 | 0 | 0.057025 | 0 | 0 | 0.082299 | 0.039688 | 0 | 0.049173 | 0.036117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111381 | 0 | 0.05589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Thatguyinclass1 | 2018/11/25 | Well, fuck Sigh... it’s come to this, me crying here with a gun in hand... nobody will remember me, fuck! I’m done, goodbye... | -0.307333 | 1.816186 | 1.82 | 96.856667 | 89 | 4.933333 | 16.333333 | 6.427356 | -0.416867 | 90 | 2 | 21 | 1 | 3 | 30 | 23 | 25 | 0.401 | 0.533 | 0.066 | -0.8932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.295354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.376629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.350877 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.633959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.388407 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.308283 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | sadpersonintheor | 2018/11/25 | I'll go to the ER tomorrow... to work am a medical student and currently assigned rotation in the ER. There are about 3-4 suicide attempts coming in per week... I hear them discussing it in the office (I am mostly dealing with strokes, not with suicides, so have not had contact with those patients directly) ... it is o... | 3.958462 | 5.90537 | 5.279236 | 78.72342 | 72.757962 | 7.633317 | 30.548261 | 8.384062 | 2.521332 | 645 | 29 | 114 | 11 | 13 | 215 | 102 | 157 | 0.078 | 0.788 | 0.133 | 0.796 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 15 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 24 | 6 | 2 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 7 | 15 | 5 | 17 | 20 | 2 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 84 | 23 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105643 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149284 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138367 | 0 | 0 | 0.111765 | 0.178667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175253 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098491 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.585971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169333 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234868 | 0.131804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101054 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.204436 | 0 | 0.139012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126166 | 0.175996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Throwmyselfaway9900 | 2018/11/25 | How to Talk to my Girlfriend about Suicidal Thoughts without Hurting Her Hey everyone. So as of late I have been in a cycle of panic attacks and depression that has slowly been eating away at me. I know the primary reason is my depression but secondary to this is anxiety about school (I want to be a doctor but I might ... | 4.676022 | 5.707765 | 5.931786 | 78.325093 | 69.662983 | 9.106917 | 31.054586 | 9.3871 | 2.779122 | 1,450 | 60 | 279 | 30 | 25 | 487 | 171 | 362 | 0.225 | 0.667 | 0.108 | -0.9949 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 13 | 26 | 4 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 40 | 16 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 56 | 65 | 37 | 3 | 7 | 15 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 15 | 19 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 7 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 61 | 12 | 48 | 46 | 3 | 22 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 37 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 216 | 76 | 7 | 0 | 0.196908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0812 | 0 | 0 | 0.083208 | 0 | 0 | 0.066451 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113015 | 0 | 0.063567 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189065 | 0.078071 | 0 | 0 | 0.050654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1846 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.214709 | 0 | 0.08624 | 0 | 0 | 0.085051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070011 | 0.079401 | 0.07468 | 0 | 0.391673 | 0 | 0.126046 | 0.059363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064199 | 0 | 0.086827 | 0 | 0 | 0.069696 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082039 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088955 | 0 | 0 | 0.08673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091334 | 0 | 0.093735 | 0.175971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.040596 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.22499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0923 | 0 | 0.08374 | 0.264452 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122169 | 0.061614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194988 | 0.092267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097134 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085436 | 0.082046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066081 | 0.083193 | 0.084097 | 0.066216 | 0 | 0.173373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181785 | 0.188591 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053244 | 0 | 0.065968 | 0.048453 | 0.095506 | 0 | 0.079401 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245058 | 0.131914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080101 | 0 | 0.120988 | 0 | 0 | 0.059028 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | brtyui | 2018/11/25 | Left in the darkness I've been asking to die from some kind of cancer, being murder or hiv though sex or anything else that comes to mind.
I get that my life's been a mistake , I have an adoption folder that says no one's wanted me around. Not even the folks who adopted me. Who would want me. I don't , I seem to fail... | 0.23193 | 2.197193 | 1.847164 | 98.739868 | 84.672515 | 4.501754 | 17.102339 | 5.461319 | -0.753033 | 614 | 13 | 146 | 3 | 18 | 199 | 109 | 171 | 0.259 | 0.635 | 0.107 | -0.9866 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 8 | 11 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 13 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 28 | 29 | 10 | 5 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 18 | 3 | 13 | 24 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 7 | 0 | 5 | 3 | 79 | 28 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136631 | 0 | 0 | 0.113373 | 0.122645 | 0.128797 | 0 | 0.12944 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.241128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.140974 | 0.115089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090996 | 0.249242 | 0 | 0 | 0.123819 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069661 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071979 | 0.132162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122457 | 0.152423 | 0.143467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.299376 | 0 | 0.097311 | 0 | 0 | 0.121654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.150072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139109 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093357 | 0.209561 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.219121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125421 | 0.143725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091529 | 0.088278 | 0.135359 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093537 | 0 | 0 | 0.143424 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113675 | 0.325042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097868 | 0 | 0 | 0.08872 |
suicidewatch | Bpdpineapple2 | 2018/11/25 | Hopefully tomorrow I'll order the stuff needed to do the deed I can't handle this anymore. My life's a mess,so am I. It doesn't get better. I'm sick of lying to myself and hearing lies. I'm tired of waking up with no direction, meaning. Just suffering. What am I holding on for? | 0.267167 | 2.51405 | 3.297143 | 86.435932 | 87.474576 | 6.083293 | 21.987893 | 7.44753 | 1.166122 | 219 | 8 | 44 | 4 | 7 | 78 | 49 | 59 | 0.315 | 0.643 | 0.042 | -0.9469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 8 | 12 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 28 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.292185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.37235 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.328131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233349 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.359869 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.244964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378193 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.379711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | ThatOneMusicalCunt | 2018/11/25 | On June the 12th I'm going to hang myself off the side of a bridge Everything i do, everything i say, all my achievements and failures are all gonna go away in the end. | 4.84 | 4.114912 | 5.852222 | 85.165 | 69 | 9.422222 | 29.111111 | 8.841846 | 1.925711 | 132 | 4 | 30 | 2 | 2 | 44 | 30 | 36 | 0.091 | 0.909 | 0 | -0.4588 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 19 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.359701 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.688163 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.435166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.304458 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | behappywithyourself | 2018/11/25 | Must feel amazing to not want to kill yourself at least 5 times a day. I don't even remember what a normal life feels like after starting this beautiful depressive journey in October 2017. Some of you are so unbelievably strong that you are still here after eternities of pain.
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Also blows my mind that the... | 5.960667 | 7.851494 | 5.245 | 81.206667 | 67.5 | 8.333333 | 30.833333 | 8.841846 | 2.581958 | 352 | 14 | 61 | 6 | 6 | 106 | 57 | 80 | 0.09 | 0.669 | 0.24 | 0.9511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 11 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 11 | 10 | 3 | 14 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 40 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104958 | 0 | 0.426616 | 0.478436 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169286 | 0 | 0.113042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086687 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132724 | 0.093762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185406 | 0.06412 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139655 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09099 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148676 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092897 | 0 | 0.104813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153061 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154825 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.478436 | 0 |
suicidewatch | spookorbs | 2018/11/25 | Fantasizing about it. I live in the Tampa Bay area, and I see the Sunshine Skyway every time I drive between home and school. Recently I've been thinking about jumping. I know it's a painful, awful way to go, but I can't help it.
I'm living at home at 22-ish and working a shitty retail job while I go to school. I got ... | 4.989166 | 5.228824 | 6.174247 | 79.696224 | 68.622266 | 9.75076 | 31.732765 | 9.698959 | 2.806543 | 1,955 | 78 | 403 | 41 | 31 | 658 | 221 | 503 | 0.217 | 0.672 | 0.111 | -0.996 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 51 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 29 | 23 | 2 | 3 | 23 | 1 | 27 | 9 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 90 | 73 | 45 | 2 | 8 | 26 | 2 | 11 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 19 | 25 | 1 | 0 | 22 | 4 | 1 | 8 | 14 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 14 | 53 | 11 | 51 | 62 | 8 | 42 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 17 | 17 | 3 | 5 | 24 | 245 | 72 | 15 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053109 | 0.05526 | 0 | 0 | 0.045162 | 0 | 0.10161 | 0.150053 | 0.131725 | 0 | 0 | 0.054651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.055451 | 0.242904 | 0 | 0.056511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053024 | 0 | 0 | 0.04283 | 0 | 0.114401 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131593 | 0 | 0.111909 | 0.126918 | 0 | 0 | 0.062607 | 0 | 0.335798 | 0.284667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075487 | 0.055703 | 0.106231 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.222572 | 0 | 0.133233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074971 | 0 | 0 | 0.065903 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.255487 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093817 | 0.227118 | 0 | 0.175928 | 0.058772 | 0.055769 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059939 | 0.06284 | 0.177321 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077781 | 0 | 0 | 0.097641 | 0.14773 | 0.051221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141334 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066762 | 0 | 0.070637 | 0.06643 | 0 | 0.08509 | 0 | 0.065574 | 0.071301 | 0 | 0.11343 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.201637 | 0.052922 | 0 | 0.069282 | 0 | 0.068171 | 0.054936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065683 | 0.148685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076074 | 0.069428 | 0.076026 | 0.145287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099867 | 0.106758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.044121 | 0.042554 | 0.065249 | 0 | 0.116176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.039171 | 0.052715 | 0 | 0.080872 | 0 | 0 | 0.059926 | 0 | 0 | 0.064019 | 0 | 0.145046 | 0 | 0 | 0.047177 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | anxtitty | 2018/11/25 | Would My Cat Care Would my cat care if I died? I don’t expect anyone here to know the answer, but she’s extremely clingy to me and is always by my side. I’ve been feeling super suicidal lately and I don’t think I’ll do anything but if I did, would she know? Would she get over it? | 0.297634 | 2.010226 | 2.523871 | 95.372473 | 82.870968 | 5.423656 | 16.784946 | 6.427356 | -0.42888 | 218 | 4 | 52 | 2 | 6 | 74 | 40 | 62 | 0.127 | 0.697 | 0.176 | 0.316 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 17 | 6 | 2 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 3 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 34 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157202 | 0 | 0.185011 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.458447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233332 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117461 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.247115 | 0 | 0.253612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245921 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144058 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.638835 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | radtothebone_ | 2018/11/25 | Bad break up, someone please help I’m desperate and I need help. I have no one. I’m sorry if this isn’t the appropriate thread but I could really use some help please. | -0.166571 | 2.14788 | 1.974286 | 93.375714 | 94.142857 | 6.228571 | 15.571429 | 7.554174 | 0.262829 | 132 | 3 | 30 | 3 | 5 | 44 | 27 | 35 | 0.173 | 0.519 | 0.308 | 0.7351 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 15 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.210884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.531117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.178979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.579865 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.169207 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223794 | 0 | 0 | 0.295669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228121 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | mushdust | 2018/11/25 | Getting to my goal weight Starving so I can assuredly put myself down with a pill cocktail lmao my deadline is my goal weight | 2.5875 | 5.490153 | 2.771667 | 89.44 | 84 | 4.866667 | 28.833333 | 6.427356 | 1.518433 | 102 | 5 | 18 | 1 | 3 | 31 | 20 | 24 | 0.098 | 0.665 | 0.237 | 0.6096 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.194506 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.374254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.906698 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | TheSandwichMeat | 2018/11/25 | Graphic images of me doing the deed run thru my head constantly. Let me start by saying that I do not have the means to do anything, nor the means to acquire the means. But even as is, I can't stop thinking about and seeing myself blow my brains out. Nothing really stops these "visions" either, not weed, or exercise, n... | 0.055594 | 2.376645 | 2.278261 | 92.383768 | 90.652174 | 4.805797 | 18.971014 | 6.427356 | 0.155214 | 431 | 13 | 90 | 5 | 15 | 145 | 76 | 115 | 0.06 | 0.884 | 0.056 | -0.3373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 12 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 24 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 1 | 15 | 22 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 64 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13006 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139907 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189792 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183725 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176448 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112293 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193246 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174484 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.173851 | 0 | 0.08306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.555586 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171666 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.326267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270404 | 0 | 0 | 0.270959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120337 | 0 | 0 | 0.284279 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108938 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Four20- | 2018/11/25 | Fuck When is this bullshit gonna end I just wanna be in a box | -3.858 | -2.902737 | -0.266667 | 105.88 | 117 | 2 | 11.666667 | 3.1291 | -2.008333 | 48 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 3 | 17 | 15 | 15 | 0.444 | 0.556 | 0 | -0.8402 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.691799 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.72209 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | NorthernWhiteRhino | 2018/11/25 | This holiday crap My mom asked me to give my dad stories about happy childhood times with my dad.
I've discovered that I don't remember all that much, and I doubt very much that he wants to know that I seriously tried to drown myself when I was 8. He was gone much of the time, and had awful headaches when he was t... | 4.9885 | 5.844112 | 5.403333 | 83.04 | 68.833333 | 8.333333 | 30.833333 | 8.472885 | 2.226583 | 964 | 38 | 190 | 14 | 16 | 308 | 132 | 240 | 0.191 | 0.681 | 0.128 | -0.932 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 31 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 20 | 3 | 1 | 13 | 1 | 20 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 49 | 34 | 19 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 22 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 14 | 4 | 30 | 6 | 24 | 15 | 10 | 17 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 4 | 1 | 6 | 10 | 127 | 39 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104263 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115237 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122959 | 0.12286 | 0 | 0.098623 | 0.237445 | 0.099906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061292 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.094816 | 0.100658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261238 | 0 | 0 | 0.327941 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.356018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.505354 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074094 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195097 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268307 | 0 | 0 | 0.276065 | 0.131563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103387 | 0 | 0 | 0.128251 | 0 | 0 | 0.081193 | 0 | 0 | 0.079226 | 0 | 0 | 0.07182 |
suicidewatch | LBertilak | 2018/11/25 | I’m less worried about hurting family or friends with my death than with traumatising the stranger who would find my body My biggest reason for staying alive is not traumatising the stranger who finds my body
i still don’t want to hurt my family, but when i get low enough to think about suicide i can never think far en... | 7.303857 | 7.455862 | 6.237857 | 81.509643 | 63.714286 | 9.285714 | 31.785714 | 8.841846 | 2.346857 | 297 | 10 | 57 | 4 | 4 | 89 | 49 | 70 | 0.259 | 0.678 | 0.063 | -0.9395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 16 | 10 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 1 | 10 | 8 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 39 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.397604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.36986 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.337445 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.327162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138276 | 0 | 0.093508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.383195 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138037 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190765 | 0.142931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.195771 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.229361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105565 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.181759 | 0 | 0.254279 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | IFeelEmpty- | 2018/11/25 | Am really afraid one day am going to surrender. I have been thinking about suicide for the past 2 months I just can't take it anymore its getting harder and harder everyday. What am I supposed to do when the people who should be helping me and making me feel happy are one of the main reasons am thinking to end my life.... | 3.89109 | 5.57768 | 4.740714 | 83.592331 | 72.389831 | 7.769007 | 25.637207 | 8.418075 | 1.74205 | 714 | 23 | 135 | 12 | 14 | 231 | 100 | 177 | 0.213 | 0.678 | 0.109 | -0.9779 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 29 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 22 | 43 | 8 | 2 | 6 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 15 | 4 | 18 | 35 | 4 | 21 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 14 | 99 | 24 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082921 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102833 | 0 | 0 | 0.085328 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066872 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107614 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183677 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27957 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052429 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054174 | 0 | 0.176788 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091693 | 0.22076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069501 | 0 | 0 | 0.102988 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056985 | 0 | 0 | 0.109793 | 0 | 0 | 0.366197 | 0 | 0 | 0.09156 | 0.091762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099493 | 0.118052 | 0 | 0 | 0.281052 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098984 | 0.071886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265706 | 0.106611 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079826 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077962 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137774 | 0.132881 | 0 | 0 | 0.120925 | 0.476706 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187128 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | galaxymewmew | 2018/11/25 | Sudden, unexpected suicides. I know that this post is a bit different than what is normally on this sub, but has anyone here known anyone that commit suicide with literally NO signs whatsoever? You just woke up one morning and they were gone?
Does anyone have any experiences with this? | 6.5802 | 8.997125 | 6.749 | 68.9395 | 66.8 | 9.8 | 30.5 | 10.125757 | 3.5172 | 231 | 9 | 36 | 6 | 4 | 74 | 43 | 50 | 0.183 | 0.769 | 0.048 | -0.8717 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 26 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.519678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.270469 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.258836 | 0 | 0 | 0.2168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242338 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136152 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167875 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.541976 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | greeentalks | 2018/11/25 | I don’t see the point anymore I went through a lot of trauma as a kid. Every kind of abuse you can think of. I became suicidal around age 11 and it’s just kind of progressed from there. Eating disorders, self harm, drugs, alcohol have taken over my life. I thought getting clean from pills would make me feel better but ... | 0.829555 | 2.936178 | 2.638286 | 93.110333 | 83.35 | 5.409524 | 20.52381 | 6.655084 | 0.253031 | 743 | 22 | 163 | 8 | 21 | 246 | 118 | 200 | 0.237 | 0.692 | 0.072 | -0.9907 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 0 | 8 | 12 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 33 | 37 | 11 | 1 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 20 | 4 | 25 | 33 | 9 | 17 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 9 | 6 | 2 | 2 | 5 | 99 | 29 | 0 | 0 | 0.135762 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122454 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102003 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.069849 | 0 | 0.097502 | 0 | 0 | 0.101339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131322 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13288 | 0.117247 | 0 | 0 | 0.101487 | 0.118395 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096541 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10593 | 0.23946 | 0 | 0.260481 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129143 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.122664 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101847 | 0 | 0.238641 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2428 | 0 | 0 | 0.202358 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097414 | 0.103416 | 0 | 0.076485 | 0.116169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168463 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112267 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087146 | 0.121924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108318 | 0 | 0 | 0.116572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.260841 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114718 | 0 | 0.091308 | 0 | 0.119535 | 0 | 0.117618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.076124 | 0.07342 | 0 | 0.090966 | 0.066814 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067584 | 0.090951 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10622 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.35031 | 0.081396 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwawayregrets922 | 2018/11/25 | I attempted suicide this week. I tried hanging myself with a belt on a doorknob using the short drop method. I fucked up when tightening the knot and it was placed in front instead of _behind_ my neck so it didn’t crush my trachea or jugulars. I was very much at peace with my decision and I felt a _huge_ amount of reli... | 1.930673 | 4.025614 | 3.329462 | 89.715538 | 79.288462 | 6.275385 | 21.457692 | 7.365786 | 0.648784 | 802 | 23 | 170 | 11 | 20 | 262 | 125 | 208 | 0.155 | 0.795 | 0.05 | -0.9613 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 16 | 10 | 7 | 2 | 2 | 37 | 33 | 20 | 1 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 16 | 7 | 29 | 3 | 25 | 15 | 4 | 25 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 1 | 6 | 6 | 115 | 37 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13606 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126309 | 0.136639 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.261217 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170493 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144697 | 0 | 0.077609 | 0 | 0.442123 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141899 | 0 | 0 | 0.087232 | 0 | 0.12276 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.156954 | 0 | 0.074987 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128893 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112833 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.320729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09833 | 0.157813 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175822 | 0 | 0 | 0.167893 | 0 | 0.144662 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101972 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.176414 | 0 | 0 | 0.170533 | 0.10421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132566 | 0 | 0.253291 | 0 | 0 | 0.12312 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098842 |
suicidewatch | Hacker4ever069 | 2018/11/25 | I don't want to face the consequences for my actions I am 21, and 2 years ago I was raided by the FBI and state police, they took all my computers, and stuff, and 5 months later I was charged with 6 felony counts for computer hacking. I was forced to drop out of my sophmore year of college and I was arrested and spent ... | 5.394118 | 4.806659 | 6.276405 | 82.123824 | 67.823529 | 9.814379 | 30.418301 | 9.325443 | 2.295646 | 1,158 | 38 | 254 | 20 | 17 | 385 | 165 | 306 | 0.153 | 0.814 | 0.033 | -0.9684 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 12 | 0 | 34 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 49 | 50 | 21 | 3 | 4 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 24 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 2 | 43 | 2 | 45 | 32 | 3 | 43 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 21 | 175 | 52 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114248 | 0 | 0 | 0.133485 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087646 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090119 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078567 | 0 | 0.109671 | 0 | 0.135256 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249359 | 0.265748 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114153 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116583 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065168 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141315 | 0.099576 | 0 | 0.134673 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148715 | 0.137973 | 0.145495 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285183 | 0 | 0.212494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091035 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086031 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136726 | 0 | 0 | 0.102874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099404 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.098022 | 0 | 0 | 0.143111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134657 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129564 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147542 | 0.140979 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096905 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085625 | 0.082584 | 0 | 0 | 0.150307 | 0 | 0.122167 | 0 | 0.143195 | 0.175008 | 0 | 0.125901 | 0 | 0 | 0.111315 | 0 | 0 | 0.152039 | 0 | 0.103383 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091556 | 0 | 0 | 0.414986 |
suicidewatch | K-Evan | 2018/11/25 | What’s the quickest way for me to kill myself? I’m 15 so I can’t like get a gun or shit like that, thanks. | -2.423205 | -0.896724 | 0.497692 | 106.930641 | 92.461538 | 3.466667 | 12.512821 | 3.1291 | -1.945549 | 81 | 1 | 24 | 0 | 3 | 28 | 24 | 26 | 0.313 | 0.439 | 0.248 | -0.5012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234048 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.495617 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.437715 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.459839 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.412434 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.355581 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | 999FML999 | 2018/11/25 | Can't take it anymore I truly feel broken beyond repair I have been in therapy and it seems like my life is only getting worse and worse. It is all a decline I lost my job, cheated on, moved far away from friends, false rape allegations, verbally abusive mom, no money, im unhireable just due to me not being able to wor... | 1.569337 | 3.797687 | 3.532608 | 87.060884 | 81.336449 | 6.1339 | 22.811385 | 7.348243 | 0.996914 | 412 | 14 | 83 | 6 | 11 | 139 | 78 | 107 | 0.265 | 0.664 | 0.071 | -0.9734 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 13 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 16 | 21 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 12 | 2 | 12 | 15 | 2 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 55 | 17 | 3 | 0.183619 | 0.217559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.182101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172516 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.187906 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141864 | 0 | 0.095933 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.162374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.184185 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19834 | 0 | 0.182214 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100912 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129696 | 0.089707 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200442 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215053 | 0 | 0.195158 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254597 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185832 | 0 | 0.16716 | 0 | 0 | 0.188482 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138059 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209985 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133677 | 0 | 0.374247 | 0.130438 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | illogiic | 2018/11/25 | Suicide, Intrusive Thoughts and Impulsivity Lately, I have been having more vivid intrusive thoughts about suicide. “How fast should I drive before hitting this tree so it could potentially kill me.” “How tall is this building where it could end me.” However, I do not actually feel depressed or sad. Yet, when I think a... | 5.546903 | 6.713981 | 5.950465 | 78.488717 | 67.75502 | 8.911032 | 30.309709 | 9.168548 | 2.573627 | 1,039 | 39 | 191 | 19 | 17 | 334 | 129 | 249 | 0.244 | 0.724 | 0.032 | -0.9964 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 28 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 21 | 12 | 3 | 2 | 10 | 2 | 24 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 46 | 45 | 27 | 6 | 5 | 11 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 15 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 5 | 27 | 3 | 22 | 27 | 3 | 26 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 136 | 42 | 3 | 0.104884 | 0 | 0.102352 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186738 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127873 | 0.231673 | 0.089249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090348 | 0.109969 | 0 | 0.117637 | 0.251225 | 0 | 0 | 0.067642 | 0 | 0.090337 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278689 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102597 | 0 | 0 | 0.159098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.273988 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.110816 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.112281 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104081 | 0 | 0.232078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074083 | 0.051241 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089169 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102764 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071072 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.183162 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105438 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106148 | 0 | 0.095483 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.103733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.344179 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.07886 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067206 | 0.309145 | 0.333065 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115515 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | tennissm15 | 2018/11/25 | I’m done with the endless cycle of pain My depression has grown so heavy, I can no longer lift my head over the horizon.
Pain seems to be joined at the hip with joy.
But pain is a much more nastier thing
I just want to fucking die. I have some fucking Zoloft to try to OD on and I know that won’t work... I really don... | 1.601478 | 3.090976 | 2.805229 | 95.91276 | 78.084967 | 5.753444 | 21.573152 | 6.297961 | 0.04909 | 557 | 15 | 132 | 4 | 13 | 179 | 101 | 153 | 0.209 | 0.742 | 0.049 | -0.9801 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 10 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 14 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 24 | 31 | 8 | 3 | 5 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 7 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 2 | 20 | 21 | 6 | 21 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 5 | 4 | 7 | 7 | 80 | 19 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221042 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.159654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092695 | 0.148181 | 0.123796 | 0 | 0.298342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131368 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.398634 | 0.075094 | 0 | 0.163372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142758 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142632 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.144398 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10566 | 0 | 0.110855 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.16364 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.458823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092078 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130848 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095489 | 0.092098 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097585 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084777 | 0.228176 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104639 | 0 | 0 | 0.102103 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | SophiaHernid | 2018/11/25 | I'm disgusting and the world hates me because of things I can't control. I'm a non-offending pedophile. I don't look at CP. I don't harm kids. Despite this, the whole world is against me. I can't say this anywhere. I'm seeing a therapist, but it still means I have to deal with the anxiety of keeping it all inside. Some... | 2.145154 | 3.635784 | 3.409665 | 92.152201 | 76.593985 | 6.039371 | 25.624744 | 6.574016 | 0.803968 | 495 | 18 | 109 | 4 | 11 | 161 | 84 | 133 | 0.247 | 0.633 | 0.12 | -0.9704 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 12 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 22 | 26 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 14 | 2 | 15 | 25 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 12 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 69 | 23 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114768 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091453 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168265 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154668 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138695 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160604 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.266696 | 0.165979 | 0 | 0.082449 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073294 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125982 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100142 | 0 | 0 | 0.16342 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115708 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.1141 | 0.159636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.104008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23861 | 0 | 0 | 0.11955 | 0.136576 | 0 | 0 | 0.153997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127115 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.119809 | 0.125427 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164102 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131128 | 0 | 0 | 0.174189 | 0.099669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.541381 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088488 | 0.119082 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167496 | 0 | 0.144618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | AnotherStupidNegro | 2018/11/25 | Attempted to find a pool of water to drown in, ended up in a psychiatric ward for the night. and I still don't really feel anything. It's not like I should be feeling suicidal, my grades in school are decent so far. I was just scared of taking responsibility for things that are in my control. In school, I'm very lonely... | 4.334221 | 5.904575 | 5.017587 | 82.510564 | 71.072243 | 7.769506 | 27.598669 | 8.317959 | 1.906304 | 2,143 | 76 | 403 | 33 | 40 | 690 | 241 | 526 | 0.196 | 0.767 | 0.037 | -0.9981 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 59 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 5 | 41 | 15 | 3 | 2 | 19 | 1 | 45 | 7 | 3 | 8 | 7 | 84 | 81 | 29 | 8 | 13 | 12 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 8 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 22 | 23 | 1 | 1 | 16 | 2 | 1 | 11 | 16 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 11 | 60 | 7 | 74 | 46 | 7 | 74 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 31 | 31 | 1 | 6 | 30 | 277 | 82 | 9 | 0.128889 | 0 | 0.062888 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064532 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053623 | 0.069825 | 0.078307 | 0.087649 | 0.135151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090122 | 0 | 0.106064 | 0.172107 | 0 | 0 | 0.060548 | 0.099107 | 0 | 0.039285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.056996 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065805 | 0.147414 | 0 | 0 | 0.068174 | 0.055513 | 0.135137 | 0 | 0.07228 | 0.154361 | 0 | 0.141578 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066883 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.228314 | 0 | 0 | 0.042565 | 0.058294 | 0 | 0.123159 | 0.057918 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19551 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.058901 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.04979 | 0.059578 | 0 | 0 | 0.07325 | 0 | 0.051542 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057729 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068089 | 0 | 0 | 0.063465 | 0 | 0 | 0.07275 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.045519 | 0.062968 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.129051 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.047374 | 0 | 0.049703 | 0 | 0.068537 | 0.120953 | 0 | 0.061836 | 0.07337 | 0 | 0 | 0.087338 | 0.098026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134033 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12344 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072192 | 0 | 0.064462 | 0 | 0.206423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102497 | 0.06452 | 0.260884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.131386 | 0.109207 | 0 | 0.063737 | 0 | 0.091228 | 0 | 0.154396 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.211475 | 0 | 0.060738 | 0 | 0.096908 | 0.258989 | 0.281636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128442 | 0.082587 | 0 | 0.102323 | 0.075156 | 0 | 0 | 0.061579 | 0 | 0.043753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.053173 | 0.114033 | 0.102306 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124244 | 0 | 0 | 0.065446 | 0 | 0.045779 | 0 | 0.078307 | 0 |
suicidewatch | glowerist | 2018/11/25 | Not suicideal enough for help, apperently. for the past three weeks ive been intencely suicideal. i hurt the love of my life and absolutely ruined any chances of it working out. i have cronic thoughts and daydreams about ending my own life and cutting open my chest and ripping out chunks of flesh.
i went to the hospit... | 3.027993 | 5.646687 | 3.530446 | 86.914468 | 78.433962 | 6.873413 | 25.674099 | 8.000946 | 1.654502 | 442 | 17 | 85 | 8 | 11 | 138 | 73 | 106 | 0.209 | 0.639 | 0.153 | -0.7971 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 9 | 3 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 7 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 14 | 7 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 0 | 11 | 2 | 13 | 6 | 3 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 5 | 51 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17467 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.314302 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135988 | 0.158644 | 0 | 0.101409 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205824 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.164364 | 0 | 0.331691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216894 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138573 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170544 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180142 | 0 | 0 | 0.146568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.127007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128363 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.503831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121891 | 0 | 0.176467 | 0 | 0.146711 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123158 | 0 | 0 | 0.14233 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.111776 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | loafkitty666 | 2018/11/25 | I'm trying so hard and no one knows I've been really suicidal this past month or two. I had to stop taking my depression medication a few months ago because it stopped working. I feel like that time period of 2 years of taking it wasn't me. I don't know if I'm just crazy but I don't know who I am. I'm so confused and i... | -0.112312 | 1.432128 | 2.653974 | 94.775269 | 83.421488 | 5.861588 | 17.959756 | 6.895973 | -0.135021 | 825 | 18 | 206 | 10 | 23 | 290 | 113 | 242 | 0.332 | 0.527 | 0.141 | -0.9954 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 10 | 26 | 2 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 22 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 42 | 55 | 16 | 1 | 4 | 12 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 15 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 4 | 30 | 11 | 20 | 45 | 3 | 19 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 8 | 2 | 9 | 13 | 118 | 42 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082658 | 0 | 0 | 0.096576 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233572 | 0.113685 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.080313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.061589 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083804 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141445 | 0.199847 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10224 | 0 | 0.086205 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082458 | 0.099263 | 0.083531 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062501 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099823 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.461215 | 0 | 0 | 0.098735 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136667 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.168318 | 0 | 0.124486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093936 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148858 | 0 | 0.068547 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126373 | 0 | 0.297664 | 0 | 0.10354 | 0 | 0.089015 | 0.323228 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106135 | 0.119473 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.079632 | 0 | 0 | 0.186713 | 0 | 0 | 0.084889 | 0 | 0 | 0.095717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.233876 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14022 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126617 | 0 | 0.091089 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109999 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13577 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060048 |
suicidewatch | Slven97 | 2018/11/25 | cant stop relapsing Its 4am super drunk taken a couple of 1mg xanax got to go to work at 8am. Ive tried so many times to quit drugs and be normal but I Literally cant do it, im on like my 40th attempt but relapse EVERY time after 2-2weeks. Life just gets so boring and dull after a couple of days I get suicidal so I rel... | 0.030278 | 1.747588 | 3.509367 | 87.935903 | 83.814815 | 6.025309 | 20.001543 | 7.168622 | 0.51111 | 282 | 8 | 63 | 4 | 8 | 104 | 61 | 81 | 0.23 | 0.661 | 0.109 | -0.9117 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 10 | 8 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 10 | 7 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 33 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.174234 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.50402 | 0 | 0.146885 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.264127 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.237988 | 0 | 0.12944 | 0 | 0.182159 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.246018 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160872 | 0.111271 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230911 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.223155 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.242249 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190416 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.24913 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265615 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154633 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165811 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | throwaway__921 | 2018/11/25 | I told everybody I'm close to that I love them I've never in my life used reddit, it's so weird to come here as my last attempt to stay alive haha.
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For the past three weeks I've been in shambles. I don't know what's really happening to me. Somebody left my life that has been here for me for longer than I... | 2.53437 | 3.879157 | 3.870836 | 89.848489 | 75.261398 | 6.763666 | 24.811901 | 7.32111 | 0.977319 | 1,232 | 40 | 268 | 14 | 26 | 405 | 157 | 329 | 0.141 | 0.723 | 0.136 | 0.5482 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 43 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 18 | 17 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 1 | 21 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 47 | 62 | 20 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 1 | 3 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 15 | 0 | 2 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 9 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 5 | 40 | 12 | 36 | 44 | 6 | 37 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 18 | 16 | 0 | 3 | 14 | 167 | 59 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.254173 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.265904 | 0.298203 | 0.05563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.081128 | 0 | 0 | 0.067318 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068303 | 0.099734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.093562 | 0 | 0 | 0.086538 | 0.140934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0849 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124088 | 0.175323 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.126403 | 0 | 0.085479 | 0 | 0.139473 | 0 | 0 | 0.090189 | 0.090116 | 0 | 0.072339 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092347 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145422 | 0 | 0.085186 | 0.044957 | 0.066681 | 0 | 0.086619 | 0.08888 | 0 | 0.115561 | 0.119896 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221494 | 0 | 0.10921 | 0.082937 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060657 | 0.063092 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062216 | 0 | 0 | 0.090834 | 0 | 0.078091 | 0.113425 | 0.071428 | 0.170936 | 0 | 0 | 0.092222 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.052406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092668 | 0 | 0 | 0.065054 | 0 | 0.08279 | 0.065187 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.366292 | 0 | 0.087192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.08948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.077541 | 0.156335 | 0 | 0.05554 | 0 | 0 | 0.085161 | 0 | 0.141305 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.064932 | 0.065618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083365 | 0 | 0 | 0.298203 | 0 |
suicidewatch | IM_SORRY_331 | 2018/11/25 | Maybe I deserve to die and end up in hell. I aimed a live gun at my parents... Im a horrible human. | -2.647536 | -0.997879 | 1.765217 | 96.062029 | 96.391304 | 4.805797 | 20.710145 | 6.427356 | 0.238606 | 73 | 3 | 19 | 1 | 3 | 28 | 20 | 23 | 0.507 | 0.493 | 0 | -0.9371 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.421932 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.36008 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.439141 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.358989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.408431 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.451423 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Animalnyawa | 2018/11/25 | I can't fucking die yet because it would be so fucking awkward if I died before my bedridden father dies. My father has been a stroke patient for eight years and I am just so fucking tired of my life. I have a relationship, a job, and friends but somehow those things don't really fucking make a dent. I am just so fucki... | 5.374545 | 5.569077 | 5.863182 | 82.414773 | 67.787879 | 7.812121 | 34.681818 | 7.168622 | 2.301527 | 260 | 12 | 51 | 2 | 4 | 84 | 45 | 66 | 0.171 | 0.763 | 0.066 | -0.7736 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 15 | 7 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 2 | 38 | 11 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09308 | 0 | 0.129931 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.475414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.11797 | 0.705812 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151524 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.107852 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097819 | 0 | 0 | 0.163935 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.101443 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.350997 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108469 | 0 | 0 | 0.098329 |
suicidewatch | happywithcats | 2018/11/25 | When does it ever get better? I feel like bad thing after bad thing keeps happening, and there’s no way out. I feel myself slipping. I feel like I can’t contribute positively at all to society, like I don’t, and never will. I feel like a waste of space, and like I don’t matter. I want things to get better, but they kee... | 0.360346 | 2.538577 | 2.66066 | 91.72011 | 86.075472 | 5.797484 | 20.154088 | 7.168622 | 0.512499 | 391 | 12 | 86 | 6 | 12 | 133 | 62 | 106 | 0.12 | 0.65 | 0.23 | 0.7346 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 6 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 21 | 26 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 15 | 8 | 7 | 23 | 2 | 10 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 54 | 21 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.238045 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.378219 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.124746 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128944 | 0 | 0.136212 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.288308 | 0.305511 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.297904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.252111 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.253408 | 0 | 0 | 0.078341 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.348211 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13678 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.113361 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142652 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149023 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.28411 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.084079 | 0.113149 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.14527 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Individuate | 2018/11/25 | From Suicidal to Euphoria Never give up. Please. Believe in yourself. You WILL make it. Everything gets better.
I'm crying in pure joy as I read my journal over this past few years and seeing how much I have improved.
Talk to people, anyone. Open up. But mostly, help yourself and love yourself. | 1.805556 | 4.529565 | 2.701852 | 86.378333 | 96.037037 | 4.622222 | 22.666667 | 6.427356 | 1.063756 | 232 | 9 | 38 | 3 | 9 | 73 | 46 | 54 | 0.132 | 0.579 | 0.289 | 0.9088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 9 | 8 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 3 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 25 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.180046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290107 | 0 | 0.227732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.282845 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.231419 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13453 | 0.247012 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.172593 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.232398 | 0 | 0.171879 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.189288 | 0 | 0.198595 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245807 | 0.178514 | 0 | 0 | 0.282651 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.257563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.281656 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.206964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165818 |
suicidewatch | mel15cool | 2018/11/25 | I don’t want to die but I don’t want to live I am in so much pain all the time. The love of my life broke up with me because he didn’t want to put the effort in and doesn’t love me anymore. When I am awake I cannot get him out of my thoughts, every single thing reminds me of him and I can’t escape it. I don’t sleep and... | -1.482554 | 0.409195 | 1.061522 | 101.70087 | 92.641304 | 4.069565 | 15.065217 | 5.51148 | -1.061639 | 623 | 13 | 161 | 4 | 23 | 211 | 92 | 184 | 0.336 | 0.551 | 0.113 | -0.9958 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 11 | 16 | 3 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 18 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 23 | 34 | 14 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 8 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 12 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 1 | 34 | 4 | 19 | 25 | 3 | 19 | 1 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 11 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 104 | 42 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108189 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.386843 | 0 | 0 | 0.106998 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.108564 | 0.158521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142824 | 0 | 0 | 0.335965 | 0 | 0.134943 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133046 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085879 | 0.117613 | 0.10955 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.065743 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.067932 | 0.12473 | 0 | 0 | 0.103991 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.128371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087151 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.278384 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.091839 | 0.063523 | 0 | 0.229625 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234701 | 0.123031 | 0.086791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.095582 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138353 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.083296 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.130117 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.21741 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.086381 | 0 | 0 | 0.103224 | 0.075817 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.306763 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132504 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Blip459 | 2018/11/25 | Completely alone A group of people discriminated against me for having a mental illness and the people who I thought were my friends chose to continue to support the group and left me alone. My only other friend lives several hours away, and my girlfriend dumped me a few weeks ago; I've been completely alone ever sinc... | 8.193994 | 7.126151 | 7.488223 | 77.294759 | 62.38843 | 10.711295 | 35.869146 | 9.725611 | 3.218437 | 502 | 19 | 96 | 8 | 6 | 156 | 82 | 121 | 0.122 | 0.812 | 0.067 | -0.6848 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 0 | 8 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 15 | 12 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 11 | 4 | 16 | 6 | 2 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 8 | 62 | 17 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133583 | 0 | 0 | 0.468229 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105371 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.141584 | 0 | 0 | 0.091863 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154807 | 0 | 0 | 0.316005 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133472 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349283 | 0 | 0.078733 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.148406 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163732 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.133068 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151867 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.158131 | 0 | 0 | 0.229223 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208948 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170244 | 0 | 0.124658 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.125989 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.171009 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.200232 | 0 | 0 | 0.239273 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.102313 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.12088 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.109709 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Hanthenightfall | 2018/11/25 | Lets face it I dont have the balls to kill myselfe | -2.73 | -1.132514 | -0.466667 | 109.095 | 105.666667 | 2.4 | 14.333333 | 3.1291 | -1.788467 | 40 | 1 | 11 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 12 | 12 | 0.343 | 0.657 | 0 | -0.6908 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.614019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.579629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.535734 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | kijana0623 | 2018/11/25 | Postpartum I know that I want to do it, I'm just trying to build up the nerve to go through with it. I have a six month old baby so I want to do it before he is old enough to remember me. I've been depressed since he was born but I've never talked about it. If I did, my husband would just dismiss it as a cry for attent... | 2.064102 | 3.194207 | 4.038046 | 89.043574 | 76.087379 | 7.480097 | 23.554612 | 8.076483 | 1.10736 | 746 | 22 | 169 | 12 | 16 | 255 | 116 | 206 | 0.163 | 0.692 | 0.145 | -0.6161 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 25 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 38 | 38 | 17 | 0 | 5 | 12 | 6 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 10 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 12 | 1 | 29 | 7 | 20 | 23 | 2 | 14 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 24 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 118 | 39 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.149266 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.09175 | 0 | 0.128073 | 0 | 0 | 0.133114 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.153688 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165328 | 0 | 0 | 0.129634 | 0 | 0 | 0.157251 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.155517 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135269 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.165027 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085538 | 0 | 0.240753 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134828 | 0.148598 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100884 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.339815 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.13378 | 0 | 0 | 0.082716 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10631 | 0.073532 | 0.150851 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120136 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.116083 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.31587 | 0 | 0 | 0.11447 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.154749 | 0 | 0 | 0.170499 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.137019 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249007 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120974 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.096441 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143819 | 0 | 0.204373 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.17755 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.135327 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.145086 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.213836 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | -Fli | 2018/11/25 | i need someone to talk i cant post the whole story but i just dont wanna go to school i just cant and i also cant switch cause its my last year i jusr dont know what to do besides just ending it | -2.515 | -0.879686 | 0.805 | 103.54 | 94.833333 | 3.2 | 12.166667 | 3.1291 | -1.858233 | 152 | 2 | 42 | 0 | 6 | 54 | 31 | 48 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 9 | 9 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 28 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208017 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.267213 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.609714 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.230388 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.147831 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.142954 | 0.212031 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.192874 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249122 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.263254 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220397 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.209073 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.290413 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.167508 |
suicidewatch | smilebroken | 2018/11/25 | So close to the edge and so scared. My daughter took her own life nearly 6 years ago. And I can't stop thinking about doing the same. I hate and blame myself constantly. I am nearly recluse because of anxiety. Was in therapy until they took me to hospital have not been back for months. Guess I just need some where to v... | 1.336406 | 3.928317 | 2.28 | 92.965 | 86.65625 | 5.7 | 20.5 | 7.168622 | 0.63635 | 255 | 8 | 52 | 4 | 8 | 80 | 53 | 64 | 0.174 | 0.798 | 0.028 | -0.8642 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 12 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 10 | 8 | 3 | 14 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 7 | 39 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.220594 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.190372 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.191353 | 0 | 0.151699 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.268922 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.27414 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.245691 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175773 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.198633 | 0 | 0 | 0.184522 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.249146 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.208053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.284586 | 0 | 0 | 0.159455 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.552971 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160254 |
suicidewatch | iSsHEpREGNANt1847 | 2018/11/25 | Welp, Goodbye. I tried. Tonight might be the night I’m done. Nothing specifically bad happened, I just can’t do it. I have this pit in my chest. The only thing that may make me wake up tomorrow is my wonderful, amazing, beautiful gf. I haven’t told her what I’ve been feeling in the time we’ve been together (over 2 year... | 2.38505 | 4.34172 | 3.371598 | 90.630529 | 77.270677 | 6.237845 | 26.872807 | 7.168622 | 1.243622 | 516 | 21 | 108 | 6 | 12 | 165 | 90 | 133 | 0.026 | 0.708 | 0.266 | 0.9857 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 4 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 17 | 3 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 20 | 29 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 23 | 9 | 11 | 19 | 0 | 13 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 7 | 0 | 6 | 7 | 71 | 32 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.151964 | 0.110947 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160966 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.185563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.186252 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.15204 | 0 | 0.1612 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163572 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.092026 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.332694 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.160944 | 0 | 0.163038 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215674 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.361539 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.100024 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.088917 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121488 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.193076 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.134952 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.170797 | 0 | 0.174636 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.138421 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199784 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.30842 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.136843 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.120914 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106127 | 0 | 0 | 0.173911 | 0 | 0.123568 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.197374 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.117204 |
suicidewatch | viperasps89 | 2018/11/25 | Help. Overwhelming urge to drink bleach. I'm in financial debt and jobless. It's apparently affecting my family's credit score. I want to kill myself and hopefully they can use my life insurance to pay off my debt. | 2.94075 | 5.931142 | 4.64 | 76.045 | 83.25 | 10.2 | 25.5 | 9.888513 | 3.6661 | 173 | 7 | 30 | 7 | 5 | 58 | 32 | 40 | 0.229 | 0.579 | 0.192 | -0.4215 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 6 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 2 | 5 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 15 | 7 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.396608 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.381665 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.271368 | 0 | 0 | 0.402116 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.447916 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.285964 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.349668 | 0 | 0 | 0.238796 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | Xcaleber503 | 2018/11/25 | I'm about to lose everything. Because of financial burden If anyone has a heart out there to help me cover my medical bills, student loan debt, rent coverage, I was out of work for a month and have no income and just lost my job. My life is on the verge of just ending it now all because this twisted world runs on money... | 5.801105 | 6.293952 | 5.883246 | 81.603009 | 66.906977 | 8.620543 | 29.303295 | 8.472885 | 1.994743 | 525 | 17 | 102 | 7 | 8 | 166 | 83 | 129 | 0.198 | 0.641 | 0.161 | -0.6711 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 19 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 6 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 9 | 0 | 9 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 15 | 12 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 2 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 10 | 2 | 17 | 10 | 2 | 12 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 7 | 1 | 4 | 4 | 63 | 13 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.196009 | 0.276394 | 0 | 0.162644 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.240963 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.215775 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.175053 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.177629 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099934 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234208 | 0.529904 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.19613 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.139601 | 0.096559 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.221112 | 0.215751 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.199105 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.157757 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.216953 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.2264 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.143887 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | stephQn | 2018/11/25 | Gay Hey guys. I just want to tell you what my life is like. I am gay in a homophobic country and it really sucks. I am 23. I came out to my parents and friends which resulted in me losing almost all of my friends. My mom and dad dicorced since he refused to support my "disgusting" life. He and my brother don't want to ... | 2.627227 | 4.396433 | 4.345645 | 84.760294 | 75.975089 | 7.245611 | 24.875593 | 8.076483 | 1.469786 | 1,086 | 37 | 220 | 18 | 24 | 366 | 153 | 281 | 0.185 | 0.702 | 0.113 | -0.9716 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 32 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 1 | 17 | 20 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 27 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 46 | 44 | 23 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 13 | 21 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 11 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 2 | 33 | 9 | 31 | 36 | 4 | 32 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 6 | 26 | 16 | 1 | 6 | 12 | 163 | 46 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.207331 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070401 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085192 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.097265 | 0 | 0 | 0.063108 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.118405 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.089166 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.105942 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068377 | 0.187289 | 0.087225 | 0 | 0 | 0.101268 | 0.292783 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.18924 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.23995 | 0 | 0.108175 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.205013 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.10221 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.365615 | 0.050577 | 0 | 0.091415 | 0 | 0.086935 | 0.115818 | 0 | 0 | 0.186871 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.121248 | 0 | 0.110031 | 0 | 0 | 0.239535 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.099335 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.078736 | 0 | 0 | 0.114953 | 0 | 0 | 0.215314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132642 | 0 | 0 | 0.111147 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082496 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085637 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087717 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.082675 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.234959 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.090486 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.068778 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.060366 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.070287 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.085419 | 0.183186 | 0.246521 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
suicidewatch | tosseraccount1985 | 2018/11/25 | Hopeless and don’t see a reason to carry on Well.. I don’t know how to begin this so I’ll just say I’m 28 m. I’ve struggled with myself since I was about 15 when my scoliosis started to develop and throughout the years progressively got worst.
I was the type of kid that sat at home all day playing video games and on... | 3.705866 | 4.796939 | 4.806446 | 85.271113 | 71.99639 | 7.345054 | 26.124368 | 7.645422 | 1.314691 | 2,142 | 68 | 439 | 25 | 40 | 704 | 270 | 554 | 0.131 | 0.791 | 0.078 | -0.984 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 47 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 7 | 31 | 26 | 1 | 5 | 22 | 1 | 35 | 23 | 17 | 7 | 13 | 81 | 75 | 42 | 1 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 21 | 34 | 3 | 1 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 9 | 14 | 1 | 3 | 17 | 14 | 48 | 12 | 68 | 50 | 17 | 77 | 0 | 5 | 10 | 1 | 16 | 28 | 0 | 7 | 45 | 277 | 69 | 5 | 0 | 0.088961 | 0.14654 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.066557 | 0.080241 | 0 | 0.077763 | 0 | 0.120088 | 0.062475 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057438 | 0 | 0.148924 | 0.0525 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.115468 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059948 | 0 | 0 | 0.338956 | 0 | 0.064669 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.087072 | 0 | 0.125444 | 0 | 0.066501 | 0.232742 | 0 | 0.148775 | 0.135834 | 0.063261 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.072091 | 0 | 0.068624 | 0.063866 | 0 | 0 | 0.116018 | 0 | 0.156911 | 0 | 0.085343 | 0 | 0.120101 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.132791 | 0 | 0.06726 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.075314 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.074508 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.123791 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.163156 | 0 | 0.1591 | 0.110045 | 0 | 0.0663 | 0 | 0.315254 | 0 | 0.081962 | 0.063833 | 0.067765 | 0 | 0.050118 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.057909 | 0 | 0.079852 | 0 | 0.147131 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.114208 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.071675 | 0.104106 | 0.06556 | 0.078446 | 0 | 0.070978 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.0481 | 0.077198 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059709 | 0 | 0 | 0.179494 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.062109 | 0 | 0 | 0.076538 | 0.063618 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.106288 | 0 | 0.119923 | 0 | 0 | 0.313972 | 0 | 0.082129 | 0 | 0.070765 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.073769 | 0 | 0.087563 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.050976 | 0 | 0.073345 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.059597 | 0 | 0 | 0.067509 | 0.069603 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.054661 | 0.07625 | 0 | 0.053337 | 0 | 0 | 0.145053 |
suicidewatch | phuckedit | 2018/11/25 | The chord broke Just tried suicide by hanging. The fucking chord broke. Fml | 2.837436 | 4.961432 | 0.623077 | 98.31359 | 111.307692 | 1.733333 | 27.410256 | 3.1291 | 0.327226 | 61 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 3 | 16 | 10 | 13 | 0.502 | 0.498 | 0 | -0.8779 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.583285 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.690135 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.42836 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
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