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GovernmentDramatic88 | When I was 19 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, though I didn’t start taking medication until I was 26. I’m now 33 and I do fairly well on a mood stabilizer, but I continue to have a lot of the crossover symptoms with ADHD. Like I’m still impulsive and restless and I’ll have periods of hyperfocus and I’m always spending a ton of money on supplies for new hobbies that I lose interest within a month. I don’t sleep well and I’ve never had a good attention span. Recently when I was trying to determine my age of onset for the bipolar disorder, I realized I had manic like symptoms through adolescence, many of which are crossover symptoms with ADHD. Both my dad and brother have ADHD, but my mom always minimized my mental health symptoms in general so I was convinced I couldn’t possibly have ADHD. Reading this sub has made me question my diagnosis again and I’m not sure how to bring it up to my doctor. I see her on Wednesday and she has generally been a good doctor for me because she gives me a lot of control over medications and dosage, but I’m worried she won’t take me seriously on this particular topic. I could really use some advice on how to approach this with her. | 2021-12-18T09:29:20.000Z | rj3xiu | 5 | 1 | ADHD | I think I was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3xiu/i_think_i_was_misdiagnosed_with_bipolar_disorder/ |
robbiexstark | Does anyone else with ADHD struggle with the idea that they aren’t infinite? If I could do something as fast as I gain an interest for it, I’d live 100 lives. I feel like ADHD makes you look for the next interesting thing constantly and then there’s 5 things I come across in a day that I could make an entire life out of. It’s like “Oo what if I design my own shoe? What if I made my own clothes? What if I just pack up and travel the world? But I need money, so what if I have a really successful career real quick? Maybe I’ll fall in love with the girl I just met at the store and the person I’ll meet tomorrow too.” That could easily be 10-20+ years of bringing those ideas to fruition, but there’s only 24 hours in the day. I feel like everyone goes through this but maybe it’s more intense for people with ADHD cause our brains can move so fast sometimes with not much time to actually do those things. Thoughts ?? Just curious cause I go through this every night. | 2021-12-18T09:26:06.000Z | rj3w0y | 144 | 1,034 | ADHD | The struggle of not being infinite? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3w0y/the_struggle_of_not_being_infinite/ |
George_1000 |
I was diagnosed with ADHD in 4th grade (9th now) and have always had sensory issues with my ADHD. Theres a bunch of things, but tags on shirts, stitching and itchy material in clothes, and being wet/wet hair especially bother me. Taking tags off shirts and being picky with clothes is… manageable, but ive always had trouble washing my hands and showering since I was little. I used to go 3+ weeks without showering in elementary school (I know, gross), but now I very begrudgingly shower one ~~or two~~ times a week just because of school, and if I don’t, my head starts itching and it becomes more of a problem.
When I can actually get myself up and shower I usually don’t really mind once im in there, but getting out, my skin feels all dry and weird and uncomfortable, and since I have slightly longer than normal hair for a boy, it takes a while to dry. I used to completely blow dry my hair since I HATED it feeling wet, but now I try to towel dry it first as much as I can, then blow dry it just to keep it from feeling wet. Once I get out of the shower and my hair is dry it just feels dry and my scalp and skin feels dry and weird. Theres really no winning. After I wash my hair it gets really frizzy, and doesn’t hold much and just moves around a lot which really bothers me too.
Ive never had much of a problem with people touching me or hugs or anything either, but I just \**cant\** after I shower. Not happening.
Anything ive found about showering/baths and sensory processing with adhd can be helpful but mostly have to do with little kids that dont really work for adults or teens (ex: bubblebath, make it into a game, etc) Anyone have any tips on getting past the wall and doing it, or helping with the sensory issues? | 2021-12-18T09:17:39.000Z | rj3rqs | 3 | 0 | ADHD | Showering and sensory processing with ADHD? | 0.5 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3rqs/showering_and_sensory_processing_with_adhd/ |
purpleand20 | I found out about me having ADHD during my final year of college and was medicated shortly after. My grades went from the first 5-6 letters if the alphabet to A's and B's. For the first time, I realized that I wasn't dumb and it made all the difference.
Instead of going to a top 5 university in my state, I ended up going to a college that was super easy to get accepted to. There are moments where I wish I didn't have the disorder to begin with so I could actually thrive instead of me struggling for so long. | 2021-12-18T09:17:32.000Z | rj3rp5 | 8 | 25 | ADHD | Sometimes I wonder how life would've been for me had I been diagnosed and treated at a younger age... | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3rp5/sometimes_i_wonder_how_life_wouldve_been_for_me/ |
bobzburgerzlu | I’m 21, graduated highschool like 3-4 years ago now.
I was in smaller classes and always always struggled ever since middle school. I would never pay attention cause I didn’t care, I was a horrible test taker and everything else basically.
I was tested several times for learning disabilities so how come they never diagnosed me with ADHD? I feel like it was so obvious and I would have gotten much better grades if I had proper resources.
I barely graduated highschool and all they would do was send me to guidance counselors and they would tell me I’m failing. That’s all they really ever did. I guess it’s a dumb thing to be upset about now but now I struggle so much more in adult life because I feel like I was never offered resources early enough.
I still don’t really have resources but it’s my own fault. I don’t talk to anyone or have gone on medication but maybe I should. | 2021-12-18T09:16:15.000Z | rj3r4d | 1 | 2 | ADHD | I’m kind of upset that I wasn’t diagnosed with ADHD in school. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3r4d/im_kind_of_upset_that_i_wasnt_diagnosed_with_adhd/ |
[deleted] | [removed] | 2021-12-18T09:15:08.000Z | rj3qlb | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Does anyone ever wonder how life would've been for them had they gotten diagnosed earlier? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3qlb/does_anyone_ever_wonder_how_life_wouldve_been_for/ |
nnaoam | EDIT: tysm to everyone giving advice but I'm mostly just ranting about being confused about when we decided velcro shoes are for kids haha, I use laces and I'm mostly used to undoing them now and I even found slip-ons that kind of work when my back is okay so I'm good in terms of shoe ideas personally
Except for the person who suggested heelys, those are simultaneously a great idea and a terrible, terrible idea and those are the best kinds of great ideas
--
Let's face it, almost none of us reliably tie and untie our shoes every time. With a lot of shoes that damages the back of the shoe both visibly and in terms of comfort. I need supportive shoes to put my insoles in because I have flat feet and that causes all sorts of issues, so my shoes tend to have relatively high backs so that my ankle is fully supported even after the extra lift.
Velcro would make this so easy. I know some companies make those stretchy or magnetic laces, but with those you can adjust them to keep them tight. Velcro you can pull to the exact tension you want and just fasten down. Three straps are enough to separately configure the front, middle and back of the arch while still not constantly coming loose (and if they do, it's really one second to do them back up).
I just wish they were a thing, that it was socially acceptable and that people made actual decent-looking shoes with velcro...
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I hate laces so much | 2021-12-18T09:12:47.000Z | rj3pef | 66 | 52 | ADHD | Velcro shoes for adults should be a thing | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3pef/velcro_shoes_for_adults_should_be_a_thing/ |
bobzburgerzlu | [removed] | 2021-12-18T09:11:00.000Z | rj3ofj | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Anyone else just stay up late/all night sometimes because it’s when your most productive or you just want to? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3ofj/anyone_else_just_stay_up_lateall_night_sometimes/ |
amanda_135 | Everytime I eat yoghurt on my meds they are not as effective but it’s one of the only things I can stomach sometimes. Is there a link between dairy products/lactic acid and the effectiveness of meds? Anyone have any studies?
And any substitutes for yoghurt for an afternoon snack/lunch that won’t effect my meds? | 2021-12-18T09:02:38.000Z | rj3kco | 4 | 1 | ADHD | Anyone experienced less effectiveness from ADHD meds after eating dairy products like yoghurt? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3kco/anyone_experienced_less_effectiveness_from_adhd/ |
Gfuel_Injections | (My) ADHD is:
always playing a game of hide and seek with your keys/wallet/phone/papers/tools/shoes/(anything that has the possibility of being covered by something else)
the all consuming dread you feel when your break's almost over
having the concentration of a 5 year old surrounded by shiny things and bubbles
having distantly related intrusive thoughts every 4 seconds and then forgetting them 🥴
adding 0.2x multiplier to time perception during break
adding 3x multiplier to time perception during work
going to bed at 10pm without distractions just to think to yourself for 4 hours
"Why am I fidgeting right now?"
finding the motivation to work and then unintentionally hyperfocusing on only one detail
wanting to do something but not knowing what to do
feeling as if any uninteresting task is merely someone else's suggestion
briefly and randomly losing any and all thought process
Instinctively activating muscle memory but for the wrong tasks
forcefully being dragged down a wikipedia hole inside your head
typing a reply to a message and realizing the next day that you never sent it
forgetting to use the systems meant to aid your forgetfulness {:/
creativity you only get when you're off your meds
changing the way you compose a sentence halfway through writing it
not remembering the words needed to describe a thought
"is this a run-on sentence?"
\+80IQ at 2:00 am B)
Having to learn the specific reasoning for anything or else you'll forget
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT ARE YOU DOING DO YOUR WORK!!" >:0
replaying the most interesting part of a song inside your head, day after day, until it's only the lyrics and 2-3 rolled chords
Dont even get me started with the ignored emails or texts
Good at debating though lmfao
I'm so *delighted* that it took me 2 hours to write this
TL;DR ADHD is basically a different plane of existence at this point | 2021-12-18T08:59:53.000Z | rj3ild | 1 | 6 | ADHD | "AdHd DoEsNt SeEm ThAt BaD" (Rant) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3ild/adhd_doesnt_seem_that_bad_rant/ |
clairegordon | The title kinda says it all. I feel like I’ve tried every tip I can think of and nothing is working. I really need to start working out regularly, I was diagnosed with hypertension this year and it is only under control when I exercise at least 5 days a week. Which seems simple enough but I just can’t get myself to go. I’m pretty good at routines when there is an artificial structure. Like for example when I have 3 classes on a day and a 2 hour break between I’ll go workout then and just do that every single time. But my work schedule can be unpredictable and when that happens I just never end up working out on those days. I also really want to start meditating every day. Perhaps it would be good to habit stack the two but for some reason I just can’t seem to get it to stick. Any advice would be appreciated | 2021-12-18T08:55:38.000Z | rj3gon | 2 | 1 | ADHD | How to actually stick to a new habit. I feel like I’ve tried everything. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj3gon/how_to_actually_stick_to_a_new_habit_i_feel_like/ |
jema810 | Normally, I get up for work at 4:45 am so I try to go to bed around 10 pm. As it often happens, I stayed up too late (12 am), but just figured I’d be a little tired during the day, nbd. Anyways, I woke up and thought the clock said 4:45 am, so I took my meds (including my Vyvanse), then immediately realized my alarm hadn’t actually gone off, checked the clock again, and saw it was 1:45 am! Now I can’t sleep and am totally screwed for work. 😰 | 2021-12-18T08:34:32.000Z | rj36im | 1 | 7 | ADHD | I feel like such an idiot! | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj36im/i_feel_like_such_an_idiot/ |
PM_UR_BIAS | I went out with my friend yesterday and my symptoms were *bad* but she didn’t care at all
The text I just sent to her, who I love so much:
“*name* I’m really really really grateful for you
I know we were joking about me being deranged yesterday—and don’t get me wrong I definitely was—but I genuinely don’t need to hide into social norms with you. If I need to be a feral adhd monster I just Can be and it doesn’t matter because you really don’t care and that means so much
I love you”
I know not everyone has this and if you don’t I’m sorry because I don’t want to boast, but it really does make me so happy | 2021-12-18T08:29:24.000Z | rj33tc | 1 | 2 | ADHD | Thanking my friend for not needing to mask around her | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj33tc/thanking_my_friend_for_not_needing_to_mask_around/ |
Flamingo1528 | Strength training helps me immensely but I realized I need cardio too for my ADHD. Walking at least 10k steps helps me so much for reducing rumination and helping focus but it takes so long. Any fast quick cardio I can do to help ADHD everyday?
Currently cant take adderall bc its giving me migraines so I need natural alternatives. | 2021-12-18T08:24:09.000Z | rj31g0 | 21 | 3 | ADHD | Whats a good exercise routine for ADHD? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj31g0/whats_a_good_exercise_routine_for_adhd/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2021-12-18T08:21:46.000Z | rj308w | 3 | 1 | ADHD | Anyone having/had troubles with diagnosis? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj308w/anyone_havinghad_troubles_with_diagnosis/ |
Pysedion | Hello. I was diagnosed ADHD when i was 12 been takling equasym (methylphenidat) until i was 25 years old. I stopped medicin Beacuse i somehow ended up with bad vision, been to All doctors Brian scan. Ended up finding out i had VSS visual snow.
I stopped My medicin Beacuse it made me verry sad and I would try anything to make it go away.. Sadly No luck after 1 year off medicin. My mood is bad om sad and never happy and couldent find peace in ny mind. So 26 years old i went to the doctor and got told to start on Ritalin. Startint on 20 mg Then 1 week going up to 40mg. When i reached 40mg My vison startet to get Even more blurry and cant focus on anything just blurry vision. Made me so afraid i stopped taking ritalin. It says on the packet it can cause blurry vision but Anyone know how long time until its away?? This is My 2 Day without and im verry afraid My vision is going to stay Even worse now :( i Hope Anyone got som experiance or know anything that could help | 2021-12-18T08:15:02.000Z | rj2wpw | 4 | 2 | ADHD | Blurred vison after New meds | 0.75 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj2wpw/blurred_vison_after_new_meds/ |
Guzwat | So recently I’ve being thinking about what job I want when I’m older and I decided I want to be a doctor but I feel like it’s way too hard with adhd because you need great grades and even when you get in you need to work extremely hard.
But then again it seems like a great job for someone with ADHD because of the high thrill intense part of the job and the hands on action that you can’t get distracted or bored easily by.
Summary: Is being a doctor/surgeon a good job for someone with ADHD | 2021-12-18T08:00:35.000Z | rj2p2j | 10 | 3 | ADHD | Is being a Doctor/surgeon a good job for someone with ADHD? | 0.8 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj2p2j/is_being_a_doctorsurgeon_a_good_job_for_someone/ |
dhoae | Awhile ago I made a post saying I was worried about taking this grad level course, then I made an update after the first exam saying I for an 86%. I also got an 86% on the second one and an 88% for the class. I forgot one paper and could have done much better on the exams with even just a few more hours of studying so I was kinda frustrated by the fact that I procrastinated but I still didn’t do it quite as bad as I just do. Anyway overall it’s a good result. Gonna try to take Biochemistry or Organic Chemistry next semester. O chem is my shit and biochemistry’s similar so won’t again the only thing holding me back is the amount of effort I put in. Wish me luck! | 2021-12-18T07:56:18.000Z | rj2mq6 | 6 | 21 | ADHD | I passed by molecular virology class! | 0.97 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj2mq6/i_passed_by_molecular_virology_class/ |
AutoModerator | Feel free to discuss your new diagnosis here! | 2021-12-18T07:36:14.000Z | rj2cgy | 16 | 3 | ADHD | "I Just Got Diagnosed!" Weekly Thread | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj2cgy/i_just_got_diagnosed_weekly_thread/ |
Mudmustard | Do y’all just always feel like you’re missing important pieces of information in social settings? Like you’re so stuck in your head that you aren’t always perceiving information correctly and tend to misunderstand situations and respond incorrectly? I do this to a degree where I feel like I must be seriously dumb. Just me? Cause ouch. | 2021-12-18T07:32:26.000Z | rj2aiv | 2 | 4 | ADHD | How un socially perceptive are you and how do you cope? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj2aiv/how_un_socially_perceptive_are_you_and_how_do_you/ |
holymoontos | So, my sister is having a really hard time right now regarding her professors and what might be discrimination case (or if not, just a case of two shitty professors that don't care about disabled students struggles), and I don't know, I just want to see if anyone has any experience, advice, and/or insights on this frustrating situation that could be useful.
Basically, to give you some background, my sister has ADHD, and is officially diagnosed and medicated. It is also recognized by the university. She also has accommodations — however, they don't explicitly cover extensions on assignments, which has been the issue of contention here (although they *do* mention directly about working with the student to meet their needs, and providing empathy),
Essentially, the issue has been, in two cases this semester, with two different professors, my sister requested extensions on assignments because of how overwhelmed she was feeling, with her documented disability as well as spiraling mental health (anxiety and depression). But instead of being even the slightest bit understanding or empathetic, the two professors she has been in communication with have been practically hostile and completely unwavering. One of them flat out won't accommodate her and added "every college student has mental health issues" and he "can't treat her differently" (ignoring that she actually has a documented disability that the school recognizes she should be accommodated for). The other has been doing the bare minimum but acts like a saint, saying my sister should feel lucky she gave her a D on her previous essay that would have earned a 97 if not for all the unnecessarily harsh grade point reductions for turning it in late (and also added, "having a disability is not an excuse to turn in assignments whenever she wants", despite the fact the professor refused to grant extensions in the first place, which my sister reached out in advance to ask for). The second professor also refused to grant an incomplete for my sister having what is essentially a mental breakdown this week for being pushed around and not having anyone willing to give her a shred of empathy, when the incomplete policy there is essentially any outstanding personal, mental, physical situation, including mental health crises.
TL:DR: there are two professors, who won't grant my sister extensions on one assignment despite her mentioning how much she is struggling despite her disability, that have sent shitty emails and said some hurtful things. And they have refused to respond and say she needs to take this higher than them, which is frankly ridiculous over an extension.
I know my sister is in a bit of a nebulous situation. Her accommodations don't SPECIFICALLY include extensions on assignments (her school doesn't offer them for some reason, which is why), though she does have accommodations for other things, like extended time on exams and note-taking tools, and they are still under general policy to accommodate for disability and prevent discrimination/equal opportunity (though again, maybe this is not something the school/office of disabilities sees as needing to accommodate since they don't offer assignment extensions as an option). Thus, I don't know... can it be called discrimination for a teacher to refuse to accommodate a student with disability (by not granting extension or even offering the slightest bit of flexibility) when there is nothing in her letter or in policy that says "extensions on assignments"?
I feel like there MIGHT be something here? My sister is a good student with a good record and grade otherwise in both classes. Her advisors are usually on her side with things. And I'm not leaving anything out either, her scenario is really as simple as she needed an extension on two assignments because of what she was going through, and her teachers have basically minimized and denied her disability verbally and through actions that either refuse to acknowledge her disability, or punish her for it (the one professor has used extremely punitive grading that honestly feels personal). So, I'm not sure. Is that enough?
If these two classes didn't really matter for her grade, and these projects didn't mean the difference between passing and failing, my sister would definitely have moved on by now. She's not trying to be dramatic or weaponize her situation, in fact she already blames herself so much even though in my opinion it's mostly not her fault. But these professors' lack of empathy has made her so upset, and I just... ugh. It makes me so mad she's treated like this, although I am not surprised. And we both kinda feel powerless about it. Like, are these cases/situations taken seriously at any university?
So in sum, I know this is a bit of an unpredictable and maybe too specific situation, but does anyone here think she would have a case at all to take this higher to anyone, like her advisor, the Dean of Students, or the Office of Disabilities? Does anyone have experience trying to prove disability discrimination like this in college? Or is it a lost cause, especially with the nebulous policies? Any thoughts and/or support are greatly appreciated! | 2021-12-18T07:29:56.000Z | rj291y | 7 | 3 | ADHD | What to do about professors that refuse to accommodate a student with ADHD's needs, when the university's policy is nebulous? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj291y/what_to_do_about_professors_that_refuse_to/ |
Curiosity192 | [removed] | 2021-12-18T07:24:53.000Z | rj26mw | 1 | 1 | ADHD | What made you decide to get tested for ADHD? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj26mw/what_made_you_decide_to_get_tested_for_adhd/ |
Curiosity192 | [removed] | 2021-12-18T07:20:06.000Z | rj242z | 1 | 1 | ADHD | What made you decide to get tested for ADHD? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj242z/what_made_you_decide_to_get_tested_for_adhd/ |
airaflof | My partner and I both have adhd which is both a blessing and a curse.
We both understand each others struggles, but we also both *CAN’T* put our laundry away once it’s clean. This results in clean laundry piling on our bed until it falls off the bed and becomes “dirty laundry” again, creating a vicious, and frustrating cycle.
Does anyone have any tricks that help force y’all to put away your laundry? Living in a giant pile of clothing is getting stressful plz help | 2021-12-18T07:18:24.000Z | rj238a | 50 | 49 | ADHD | Tips for forcing yourself to put away laundry? | 0.97 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj238a/tips_for_forcing_yourself_to_put_away_laundry/ |
Due_Contribution7911 | Hi everyone,
I’ve been unsure for days whether to post this or not. But I’ll give it a shot.
So I’m a college student, recently (around August this year) being diagnosed with ADHD and am on medication. I’m currently struggling with writing my essays for my english class. I have 3 essays due on Tuesday, with other finals coming, but I can’t get myself to work.
I know and realize the urgency of it since I will have to retake the class on next term if I failed, with the planned class schedules almost reaching the maximum credits for every term. Basically I would need to have an extra year if I failed this class (I’m planning to transfer), or messed all of my other (future) grades up because of the exceeding credit units each term.
I’ve never failed a class before, known as a smart kid at school who didn’t need to study/put so much effort to get at least a B, and thus people (especially those who are paying for my school tuition) are expecting me to finish college in 2 years before transferring. I’m majoring in STEM (can’t specify in case people who know me irl read this) and my counselors said that it’s recommended for people in my major to spend 3 years in college before transferring due to the amount of required courseworks that we need to finish. My friends who have the same or similar major with me are also planning to transfer after 3 or more years.
Sorry for the side story. So I’m feeling really awful right now because I have less than 3 days to finish those 3 of my last essays. I know it is important, I know I need to do it since months ago, I know I should do it because my life depends on it, but I don’t feel the urgency. I’ve always could pretty much relate with ADHD “time blindness,” but this one is just.. bizarre. I have no slightest idea why I can’t do what I need to do despite on medication. I know I shouldn’t rely on medication too much, but I think it should give me a better effect than this. I’m (most likely) going to get prescribed another medication next year, so it’ll be fine.
Any ideas how to start and finish my essays? I’ve spent the last 9 hours staring on my monitor just to write barely a sentence/hour. I’ve made an outline for 2 of the essays, so the problem is on how do I maintain my focus on it. The main reason I could finish my other essays is because I was interested in writing them so I could hyperfocus easily. I don’t know why I really couldn’t do these last 3. Is it because of the medication? I recently got the higher dose, could that affected my performance? It helps me to not get too frustrated and stressed though, usually I would get very much depressed with a condition like this. I’ll ask my doctor about the medication later.
PS: I’m really sorry for the long post! | 2021-12-18T07:01:53.000Z | rj1udh | 7 | 5 | ADHD | I have 3 essays due on this Tuesday. I can’t get myself to actually work. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1udh/i_have_3_essays_due_on_this_tuesday_i_cant_get/ |
MaverickTee |
The title says it all. I'm married to a Narcissist and leaving is currently not an option, so please try not to suggest that (at least, for now).
Any form of relationship with a Narc is really exhausting, even more as an ADHDer, especially that my diagnosis is only a few months old and I'm just starting to accept it (I have learnt it's one of the reasons I fell for their trick in the first place).
I absolutely understand the dynamics of their condition and I’ve now accepted that you can't change them, so I have decided to focus on ME.
I just need the magic to TAME them while I remain with them.
They sometimes try to use the diagnosis as a way to bring me down, by acting like they're very interested in knowing the impact of my symptoms and how they can best support me, but then use that information against me in the most destructive ways (they are a doctor). I stopped giving sensitive information about my ADHD (or anything else) since I knew this is a common issue with Narcs.
You bunch have been very helpful and supportive with everything else, I'm sure we can do this 💪 | 2021-12-18T06:49:23.000Z | rj1nne | 7 | 3 | ADHD | How to defeat my Narcissist forever | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1nne/how_to_defeat_my_narcissist_forever/ |
poor_charlie_bucket | Just to clarify: We’re both adults. He’s aware that I have ADHD but beyond that, we don’t discuss much about it, including symptoms or how it affects us, etc. he just knows I take medication for it and he doesn’t. He told me he thinks his is worse than mine, in a competitive sort of way, and I irritatingly responded back that how would he know that, if I’m medicated and it helps me, then he wouldn’t know what I struggle with without medication so it’s invalidating to hear that just because I’m not bouncing around as much as him. Am I wrong to feel like this? I think he was annoyed with me after but I didn’t yell at him, just irritated and told him it’s not his place but it’s many hours later and I’m feeling kinda bad about it.
Edit: UPDATE
So having some family time right now and there was a conversation with a couple of our Aunts. This was a conversation they were having in jest that I walked into…
Aunt A: I need my name on the Christmas presents too
Aunt B: this isn’t a Christmas present. It’s a birthday present for Luka because he’s my godchild
Aunt A: well I need my name on Phoenix’s (aforementioned cousin that post is about) present because I always have to share him, even when I don’t want to (fyi: phoenix is Aunt A’s favorite and it is well known and shown)
Me: oh don’t worry Aunt A, you don’t have to share him, you can have all of him. No one else is fighting to share him.
Aunt B: (laughing) that’s true!
Does it make me petty?? Yes. But does it make me feel better??? Absolutely yes. | 2021-12-18T06:49:01.000Z | rj1ngj | 58 | 122 | ADHD | Just got annoyed with my cousin because he told me, “I think my ADHD is worse than yours.” | 0.98 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1ngj/just_got_annoyed_with_my_cousin_because_he_told/ |
QuietAcorn | I’ve been getting a lot of targeted ads for cerebral for adhd diagnosis and medication. Has anyone tried using cerebral? What was your experience? How did it compare to BetterHelp/talk space? Is it a good platform for someone who is like 90% they have adhd but is incredibly anxious about talking about it? | 2021-12-18T06:47:52.000Z | rj1mua | 4 | 3 | ADHD | Anyone tried cerebral? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1mua/anyone_tried_cerebral/ |
beffersies | [removed] | 2021-12-18T06:46:10.000Z | rj1m0w | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Anyone else have to check the weather app *at least* 16 times before you finally remember what the weather is going to be lol | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1m0w/anyone_else_have_to_check_the_weather_app_at/ |
EpicDrewSon | I am currently 15 in high school, diagnosed (more inactive than active, but experience both sides) 3-4 years ago with a very high IQ, as that seems to be frequent, especially as I was a kid that knew way too much about everything. Recently I have been medicated (Adderall after Concerta did absolutely nothing) and the results are mixed. I feel good about my management of my tasks, but I had about a month of high stress. Anybody experienced a similar experience/ as you grow, how does the syndrome change with age.
I also just want to talk to people going through similar things to what I’m going through. | 2021-12-18T06:45:32.000Z | rj1lp3 | 12 | 2 | ADHD | Does ADHD change with age? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1lp3/does_adhd_change_with_age/ |
Unlucky_Actuator5612 | So I’ve recently noticed something my daughter does I think it’s either because of a transition or over stimulation.? Sometimes it’s after school and sometimes when she comes home from being at her dads house for a few days. She leans over a tall stool so her head is hanging upside down and her legs are hanging down the other side. She just stays like that for ages. She will kind of move a bit maybe make weird noises too.
Anyone else’s child do something similar?
Also… I have ADHD too. | 2021-12-18T06:42:31.000Z | rj1k2r | 33 | 20 | ADHD | Coping mechanism in child. Why is she doing this? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1k2r/coping_mechanism_in_child_why_is_she_doing_this/ |
seaiscalling | Hi, I’ve been quietly reading here for a bit. Today I had my first appointment for a diagnosis and I’m worried.
About me: I’m nearly 28 afab and in psychiatric & psychological treatment for a while now. I have several diagnoses already, among them BPD. This year I learned that BPD is often misdiagnosed in afab people when they should actually get an adhd diagnosis, but that they’re also often comorbid. In all the back and forth whether I have BPD or not I was never once evaluated for adhd. I’m not from or living the United States and I feel like the adhd knowledge isn’t on the newest standard here (here being Germany). Long story short after my partner who is diagnosed for adhd encouraged me to look into it and understand adhd better I was shocked how much applies to me, how much it explained, to the point where I started questioning if the BPD diagnosis was a fluke all along.
I had some trouble getting a new psychiatrist after my move and after months of waiting I saw my new doctor at the end of September. He believed me and wanted me to get evaluated for adhd, however he said that he’s not specialised and due to my existing diagnosis he didn’t feel like he’d be able to make the distinction, so he wanted me to see a specialist. After a lot of waiting I finally had my first (out for 3-4) appointment with a “specialist” today at a clinic further away.
The interview didn’t go well imo. The psychologist was mainly interested in how well I did in school as a kid (I was slow, very easily lost in my own head, easily distracted, always played around with jewellery or my own hair, or doodled on the sides of my pages), and in hyperactive symptoms. I had sent her two of my doctor’s letters listing my other diagnoses and how they came to these, but she didn’t seem to have read them yet. She said that I seemed like a normal kid despite everything I had told her. Overall I felt very dismissed and like she didn’t think I have any issues because I didn’t have enough issues as a kid in school. I have my second appointment with her in early January where we’e supposed to have the big interview or whatever, but right now I’m very anxious that it’ll go similarly. She also gave me a questionnaire for my parents that focuses on hyperactive symptoms during childhood. She knows that the parent who raised me has been dead for years and that the other wasn’t really present. She still wants my parent to fill it out.
I don’t know to what extent I can advocate for myself here, if I should even bother going back there. I’m afraid that if she as a specialist decides that I don’t have adhd based on my childhood, that getting a diagnosis/a second evaluation in the future will be pretty much impossible for me. | 2021-12-18T06:40:08.000Z | rj1in8 | 7 | 1 | ADHD | Anxious about how my first diagnostic appointment went | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1in8/anxious_about_how_my_first_diagnostic_appointment/ |
UCSCAnonymousSlug | Hello everyone. I have been having a bad year. My partner broke up with my 3 months ago & my housing for school caught on fire (unrelated) a week after. I have noticed myself with a lot of anxiety. It could be from the trauma of the break up and the fire that I feel differently and not like myself but I was wondering if the medication, from anyones experience, helps with reducing anxiety? I am seeking out therapy as much as I have access too. I feel like I also became more socially anxious when I’ve been usually more extroverted. I haven’t taken medication since 6ish years and I’ve been more or less well off of it. If medication isn’t what y’all use, what else do you do that works to reduce anxiety or being socially anxious, or even in attention and “ADHD Paralysis” among other adhd symptoms? I feel stuck and don’t have much opportunity to ask others :( | 2021-12-18T06:29:40.000Z | rj1cqi | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Vent/Rant (advice needed) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1cqi/ventrant_advice_needed/ |
ace-eijun | [removed] | 2021-12-18T06:18:31.000Z | rj16i0 | 1 | 1 | ADHD | I've finally been diagnosed! | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj16i0/ive_finally_been_diagnosed/ |
Searth0425 | [removed] | 2021-12-18T06:12:35.000Z | rj1360 | 1 | 1 | ADHD | The laundry | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj1360/the_laundry/ |
Uuuuuuuuummmmmmm | Hi everyone! Just recently I did an ADHD test & the psychologist who told me my results said I don’t have ADHD, but that I have ADHD-like behavior probably because of (complex)trauma/attachment issues. Do any of you know what this means and how trauma can result in such likewise behavior ? Any information is apprecisted as i’m having difficulty with figuring this out myself.
Thank you so much!! | 2021-12-18T06:03:16.000Z | rj0xs3 | 28 | 29 | ADHD | Why can trauma result in ADHD-like behavior but not necessarily ADHD itself? | 0.95 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0xs3/why_can_trauma_result_in_adhdlike_behavior_but/ |
Remarkable_Mix_6655 | Hi all!!
I was officially diagnosed with ADHD 3 days ago, for years I have struggled with every aspect of adhd, the constant thoughts, lack of focus, Incomplete tasks, interrupting people just to get my point across before my brain moves on to the next. I’m so happy to finally be Able to get help for something I thought was just normal to deal with. Today was my first day taking 10mg adderall xr and honestly I didn’t feel all too different, my mind was more controlled with less impulsive thoughts and actions, I was able to sit and do a full essay in one sitting, with tons of back round noise (which for me is huge, usually even a sniffle will get me distracted) washed 2 loads of laundry because I felt the need to. However I almost feel as if the dosage was too weak as my 12hr pill wore off on about 8-9hrs and although I got a lot done. I also felt extremely tired around 6pm for reference i took the adderall around noon. This is my first time taking a stimulant and I’m not sure really how I’m supposed to feel or if the dosage is too low so I’m hoping someone who has knowledge can help me out.
Lastly sorry if my thoughts are all over the place it has been several hours since meds wore off completely and my typical adhd brain is back. | 2021-12-18T05:54:03.000Z | rj0s95 | 18 | 1 | ADHD | Adderall XR 10mg | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0s95/adderall_xr_10mg/ |
gooniesrgood | I was diagnosed with ADD years ago and i’m sure i’ve always had it but I don’t take medication regularly (even though I should) due to side effects. I have been getting by unproductive and scatterbrained for years and years and i’m 27 now. Couldn’t finish college. Bullshit my way through every job i’ve ever had. I’ve been working an office job since last year and am lucky if I can get an hour of work done a week. I don’t know why they don’t fire me.
What is constantly hindering my life though is the fact that I can’t shop for ANYTHING, whether groceries, clothes, furniture, etc. For example, when I go into a grocery store for only a few items thinking i’ll be in and out, I end up spending 3 hours there and I don’t know how or why. It won’t even feel like 3 hours, feels more like 30 mins. But then I won’t have anything to show for those 3 hours because i’ll literally walk out with like 5 things. I can’t have people come with me to the grocery store because if they’re in the car, they’ll complain about me being in there for so long and then think i’m mental when I come back with barely anything.
Clothing is even worse. I will go to the mall or a department store or outlet or whatever and assume i’ll be in there an hour tops. I will then proceed to spend 7 hours there and half my whole day is gone. 7 hours of me hyperventilating, crying, pulling my hair out, sweating and wanting to give up. After all that time, you’d think i’d have purchased a good amount of things, but again, I literally walk out with what I can count on one hand.
It’s gotten to the point where I genuinely hate shopping and view it as torture. I won’t go grocery shopping and instead opt for fast food which I feel shit about. I won’t buy new clothed because of how overwhelming having to pick and choose a wardrobe is for me. I desperately need new clothes but I shut down when i’m presented with too many options and am unable to make decisions. It’s winter and I don’t even have jackets. I’m wearing the same shit from years ago that doesn’t even fit properly. I desperately need shoes but there are too many shoes to choose from and I have this problem where if i’m going to spend money it has to be the best/most popular.
I moved into my apartment a year ago and still haven’t bought furniture because even after a year and hundreds of hours of online browsing, I still can’t make up my mind.
Today I went to Target to get a new planner because I think it’ll somehow magically make me productive even though I buy one every year and hardly even look at it. But my mind is like “I just need a new pretty planner, then i’ll for sure focus and organize my life.” I left the store 3 hours later with a bra, LED lights, and an ugly dress that i’ll probably return if I can gather the will to do so. “I can probably find something better on Amazon.” Even though I spent 2 hours browsing on Amazon earlier today.
I have 23 tabs open on my laptop right now, a mixture of clothing/makeup sites and work assignments that i’ve been putting off. I can’t do the work until I shop and I can’t shop because I can’t make up my mind. So I shut down completely and take a nap and then things just pile up which causes everything to feel that much more overwhelming which then causes me to go back to sleep to avoid it. Cycle never ends, naturally.
I had a date a week ago but I canceled because I didn’t have anything to wear and my makeup is old and expired and my skin has been awful because I haven’t taken care of it because I am overwhelmed by the amount of skincare available and I can research for weeks and months and still not buy a damn serum of moisturizer.
Fuck. This was meant to be a short and to the point type of post. Of course nothing is quick and simple with me. I hate being me. I’m absolutely sick of myself. | 2021-12-18T05:52:02.000Z | rj0r0q | 6 | 8 | ADHD | Inability to shop like a “normal” person - Shopping for literally anything is an extremely stressful traumatic experience—PLS help me cope! | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0r0q/inability_to_shop_like_a_normal_person_shopping/ |
dochudsonmotors | [removed] | 2021-12-18T05:51:14.000Z | rj0qkj | 1 | 1 | ADHD | how to leave my chair? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0qkj/how_to_leave_my_chair/ |
TheBlueOx | This might sound like a weird post but adderall dampens the parts of myself that cause me a lot of pain, and I don't like that.
I don't do a great job feeling my emotions so one of the benefits of my adhd is that the negative emotions are so prevalent and I have access to them. I like that because I've been doing a ton of self development work and I've been keeping track of my negative emotions and making notes on them to process later in the day or in therapy. But because I have a better ability to keep them suppressed when on medication, I lose access to them. I'd like to let them out when on medication but I've been so emotionally repressed my whole life that it's not really feasible to let them out in public without looking like a child.
I assume it's probably more normal to be able to control your emotions, but does anyone have advice to help me still feel my emotions while on medication? | 2021-12-18T05:48:28.000Z | rj0oz8 | 3 | 4 | ADHD | Adderall makes it harder to feel all of the negative emotions that cause me pain. | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0oz8/adderall_makes_it_harder_to_feel_all_of_the/ |
_jm11 | Hi! I (20F) was recently diagnosed and today I started meds for the first time, 30mg vyvanse. I took it around 9am this morning with a couple pieces of toast, expecting it to take around 1-2 hours to kick in, but by 11am I still felt nothing. I noticed my heart rate was high (\~100bpm) around 1:30pm, after that I got anxious and my arms/legs felt kinda weird and a bit heavy until I calmed down and made something to eat around 2. Right now it's nearly 4pm, and the only "difference" I've noticed was what I mentioned around 1:30-2 (and this could have just been because I psyched myself out thinking about why the vyvanse wasn't working), and that my heart rate has been at \~100bpm since I first noticed it.
Am I doing something wrong? Since I took it this morning I pretty much just went about my usual day, sitting in bed on my laptop and waiting for it to "kick in" so I could bring myself to study. Should I have tried studying right after taking it to manually kick-start it or focus my attention or something? I got pretty discouraged when nothing had changed after 2 hours, maybe my negative mindset stopped me from realising any positive changes?
My doctor told me to go the first week just on 30mg, and then to add in 2.5-5mg dexamfetamine in the morning/lunch/evening if the vyvanse wasn't doing enough. She's just gone on break and won't be back until mid-jan, so it's pretty much up to me to figure out my dosage until then.
While I was waiting to get my prescription, I was reading up on all the other "day 1 on vyvanse" posts on here and getting excited about having my own miracle first day, but I didn't have anything like that and now idk what to do. I was thinking about increasing my dosage with the dexamfetamine tomorrow instead of waiting the week, but maybe the vyvanse just needs a few more days to work? I don't really know what to do, and I have an important test coming up that I really need to get myself to study for, so any advice would be greatly appreciated :) | 2021-12-18T05:40:21.000Z | rj0k3g | 3 | 2 | ADHD | First day on vyvanse, nothing changed? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0k3g/first_day_on_vyvanse_nothing_changed/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2021-12-18T05:39:02.000Z | rj0jar | 47 | 0 | ADHD | Why are you all so weird ( not in a rude way) | 0.36 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0jar/why_are_you_all_so_weird_not_in_a_rude_way/ |
notforthisworld0101 | Im an undiagnosed female who is currently waiting to see a psychiatrist. Out of curiosity, I read my school report cards and realised the overall theme was I was a good student but needed to pay more attention. Multiple teachers said I was distracted quite easily and needed to focus in class.
Based in their comments, I seemed to grasp topics/problems/subjects easily in the moment, however, i had issues retaining the information. This was apparent when I would go off to study for an exam, and then my results would come back less than expected.
They're basically saying I was a smart kid and could grasp concepts in class, but because I couldn't focus or study properly, my exam grades suffered, which was not an indicator of my Intelligence
They knew I was smart. They knew I could do the work. So they were surprised when my exam grades came out less than expected. | 2021-12-18T05:35:45.000Z | rj0hew | 5 | 4 | ADHD | I read my old school report cards | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0hew/i_read_my_old_school_report_cards/ |
[deleted] | [removed] | 2021-12-18T05:32:40.000Z | rj0fh1 | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Dear all, Please click on this post. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0fh1/dear_all_please_click_on_this_post/ |
murphy2414 | Today was officially the last day of my semester. After taking my last uni final this evening I had this thought that I absolutely cannot get out of my head.
I was diagnosed Dec 2020, which in and of itself was validating as heck. I didn't even think about the possibility of me having adhd until one of my professors suggested I get evaluated. One of the reasons being, I never struggled in school. I was always top of my class even on the honour roll and all the information accessible to me about adhd told me that because I was successful in school I didn't have it.
Onto my original thought. Throughout my entire university career I always get asked "how do you do it" (as in get high marks, etc.) It always makes me feel guilty. Like I'm a fraud because frankly... I don't do it. I don't show up to class majority of the time, I barely study, and I don't do assignments until there's extreme pressures of deadlines. It's like I want to be a good student, I want to study, I want to write my assignments early... I just can't get my pigeon brain to focus enough to do it. Even with medication it's hard to focus on the schooling aspect of my life. It doesn't help that with this trend of not being a good student I still end up getting the same marks (sometimes better) as those people that do study and do all these things; how am I supposed to get motivated to try harder when I'm able to just do the absolute least and still get good marks in these courses? It makes me feel so guilty sometimes. I always tell my niblings not to be like me, but in reality I'm still passing with good grades and close to graduating with my bachelor's of arts and science (w/ a double major). I'm supposed to be proud, but I just feel like a fraud. I was always told university would be the most challenging experience of my life, but I don't feel challenged anymore like I did my first year. Ive just been breezing through bc it's not challenging to me at all. I'm so envious of the people whose main stressor is school, my life is so hectic I just don't care about it anymore. It's crazy too because the one year I did try to be a good student I ended up on the Dean's list (university honours roll) for an entire year, so I know I have it in me, but like how am I supposed to motivate myself to get back to that? | 2021-12-18T05:27:36.000Z | rj0cd6 | 2 | 1 | ADHD | Imposter syndrome - courtesy of adhd? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0cd6/imposter_syndrome_courtesy_of_adhd/ |
Oddjelly_afterhours | I take a couple of antidepressants 1x a day and adderall 4x a day. (I’m prescribed 2x but I break them in half and do 1/2 a pill 4x instead.) I also work nights 5-6 nights a week. I mostly sleep 7/8a - 2/3p, except for when that catches up and I sleep for almost 24 hours.
I would *like* to take my antidepressants at night, because it seems like I can remember them more easily if I’m at work for some reason. And my adderall - I would *like* to take them when I wake up and then … you know … some times after that.
But half the time I forget my antidepressants at home. And with that thing where you stop seeing things that are there all the time, notes on the door haven’t been helpful.
And adderall - I can never remember if I actually took it. Was that today or am I remembering yesterday? Did I take it or did I just look at the bottle? Did I think about taking it at 10p or did I take it at 10p? Who knows?
Does anyone have any tips? Obviously like… tips for people who have ADHD and don’t necessarily work well with typical advice like “use a timer” (that sometimes goes off when I’m with a patient, and then I mute it, and then forget) or “put it in the same place” cuz girl, I try and that place changes daily. Sometimes that place disappears and doesn’t even exist for a day or two before I remember it again. | 2021-12-18T05:25:41.000Z | rj0bc7 | 4 | 1 | ADHD | Help remembering meds? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0bc7/help_remembering_meds/ |
nervouscat | Recently was prescribed dexedrine and tried to quietly take one before my final exam today while with a couple friends.
An acquaintance (I've only met them in person 3-4 times before exams) asked what the medication was, and after they asked what it was for, I said adhd.
Their response was "oh but you dont seem like you have adhd" to which i responded that I had the inattentive type (scored 9/9 inattentive, 5-6/9 hyperactive). They then said "oh but you're smart"
They haven't know me for very long and I haven't really interacted with them comfortably so I know that they don't really know who I am or what my personality is really like but the comment just bothered me quite a bit. I was really hesitant about getting diagnosed and treated because of the stigma that doctors and other people have about adhd and not achieving good grades. I know that people with adhd are bright but often the academic grade struggle is due to inability to focus and pay attention to things we don't care about/are not interested in/dont have deadlines.
I'm constantly even doubting myself if I actually do have adhd even though my doctor and everything my parents provided to my doctor leads towards it and seeing/hearing comments like that just don't really help. I think I spent so many years masking because I grew up in a strict Asian household (as a daughter too) and my grades & behaviour were always held at very high standards. It's just been on my mind a bit and self-doubt keeps trying to creep in.
Sorry just wanted to rant a bit and wondered if anybody else experiences similar situations and how to deal with it! I didn't want to deal with the situation so I just kind of shrugged it off but i feel like it's definitely a topic that people misunderstand. | 2021-12-18T05:24:07.000Z | rj0afy | 2 | 1 | ADHD | adhd invalidated by acquaintances? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0afy/adhd_invalidated_by_acquaintances/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2021-12-18T05:23:32.000Z | rj0a26 | 2 | 1 | ADHD | I don’t know what is going on with me and I can’t seem to sort myself out to a sense of normality again | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj0a26/i_dont_know_what_is_going_on_with_me_and_i_cant/ |
rustyhalo456 | I live in Australia and I am 16(m), I am looking for a good ergonomic / gaming chair to use. My budget is about $600AU and would prefer if I could purchase it physically in a store. One of the main things I want is for it to be comfortable for using for long periods of time as while I don't use it much, when I do use it it is for over 8 hours. And of course it needs to spin. Needs to be good for shuffling around in your seat as well.
I normally get neck or back pain from sitting on my old chair so one that helps with that would be perfect as well.
I am quite skinny and short so it doesn't need to be heavy duty or have a high weight limit.
Any suggestions? | 2021-12-18T05:23:06.000Z | rj09st | 4 | 1 | ADHD | Wgat Gaming/ergonomic chairs are good for gaming with ADHD | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj09st/wgat_gamingergonomic_chairs_are_good_for_gaming/ |
Merchenko | While reading longer comments on Reddit I found my focus drifting into other thoughts while still reading out loud in my head. It reminded me of being undiagnosed in school reading the same paragraph 6-7 times before I actually heard the whole thing. I realized something I do now, to keep my focus on what I am reading. I will put a creative twist on the voice in my head by trying an accent or fun voice. I’ve always had extended hyper focus when using my creative side. Making reading a creative performance in my head helps me. How do you maintain focus when you find yourself drifting? | 2021-12-18T05:22:15.000Z | rj09ai | 3 | 1 | ADHD | ADHD and Reddit | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj09ai/adhd_and_reddit/ |
StarsEatMyCrown | Just wondering. I made an appointment with my doctor on Monday (that I'm nervous about, I'm anxious that he won't take me seriously). I'm hoping that he can refer me out and get the ball rolling.
But from what I'm hearing, it can take years to be diagnosed. Is this true? I'm already old af, and I'm pretty sure I have had ADHD my entire life. I don't want to waste anymore time being like this. The thought of it taking months or years kills me. | 2021-12-18T05:19:25.000Z | rj07kk | 12 | 3 | ADHD | How long did it take for you to be diagnosed with ADHD? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj07kk/how_long_did_it_take_for_you_to_be_diagnosed_with/ |
kampala-brooklyn | I’m so mad at myself! I planned and planned to get this paper in and instead spent sooo much time doing extra and extra and extra research and having to do more and more secondary sources. It was compulsive! To the point that I had so much stuff that I couldn’t feasibly get it into a 12 page paper or even make a coherent paper out of it let alone the fact that I had less than a day left to submit. I’m so fucking bummed and feel like shit. | 2021-12-18T05:14:43.000Z | rj04u1 | 2 | 6 | ADHD | Just missed a deadline for finals | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj04u1/just_missed_a_deadline_for_finals/ |
zloganrox08 | Recently learning that i have adhd, and the only symptom i was a little unsure of was rejection sensitivity. I've always thought i was pretty good at dealing with rejection and not having issues with it.
Tonight i learned what rejection sensitivity is and that i absolutely do have it. Was very excited to hang out with my siblings for a game night this weekend. At one point while i was away, my fiancé shared a story i made very clear i didn't want shared, especially not with my family. This is the second time she's shared this story. It's a situation that is funny to look back on but I'm embarrassed about and haven't fully processed as it's rather recent.
I come back to the table to everybody dying of laughter, and the joke was referenced multiple times the rest of the night. I could not get out of that house fast enough. | 2021-12-18T05:08:21.000Z | rj00vq | 2 | 2 | ADHD | The only symptom i thought i didn't have | 0.75 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rj00vq/the_only_symptom_i_thought_i_didnt_have/ |
Chillisa98 | Has anyone else experienced a sorta daydream tunnel on their commute before? I've moved a lot and taken busses, trains, and most recently driven to work. Every time I'm getting used to a new route I notice that after a few times taking that route I'll "wake up" mid way and suddenly feel disoriented and worried cause I don't recognize anything. I'll start double checking and doubting myself thinking I got on the wrong bus/train/freeway or missed my stop/exit/turn. This repeats a bunch of times until I'm familiar with the entire route and I get so stressed out. I use my phone to get around anywhere so I usually follow the route on there and I guess zone out in between stops or transfers or exits. So yeah does anyone else do this? | 2021-12-18T05:05:27.000Z | rizz5s | 3 | 1 | ADHD | Daydream Tunnel | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizz5s/daydream_tunnel/ |
AutoModerator | Just started meds? Talk about it here. Please remember that we don't allow asking for or giving medical advice. | 2021-12-18T05:00:15.000Z | rizvfi | 46 | 5 | ADHD | Weekly "I'm new to meds!" Thread | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizvfi/weekly_im_new_to_meds_thread/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2021-12-18T04:55:42.000Z | rizso7 | 5 | 1 | ADHD | Gaining weight with ADHD, ADHD meds, and appetite | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizso7/gaining_weight_with_adhd_adhd_meds_and_appetite/ |
Such_Past_9917 | so i (22f) am pretty sure i’ve been struggling with adhd all my life but my mom was never willing to look into and hates the idea of medication but i’ve moved out and i’m own my own insurance now! one of the first things i did was find a psychiatry office nearby that specialized in adult adhd. i found one that specializes in adult adhd and ocd so i called to make an appointment. the website had two providers online and both of their bios sounded really good, however, my appointment is with a different psychiatrist. i did some googling of this guys name and there weren’t many reviews but there was one really bad from a man who said the doctor claimed adhd was fake and made him feel horrible. i found a bio of this psychiatrist online and it says that he specializes in ketamine treatment too and 1. never heard of ket being used to treat adhd and 2. definitely don’t want to be prescribed ketamine. the other 5 or so reviews were all 5 stars and said the guy was fantastic. do you guys think i should just try and find a new psychiatrist or give this guy a shot. the receptionist also said it’s been really busy lately and that it’s been hard to get new patients in.
TIA
edit: i hope this doesn’t sound like i am trying to self diagnose, just looking for some answers in my life and this seems to make sense (: | 2021-12-18T04:52:26.000Z | rizqly | 4 | 1 | ADHD | should i still see this psychiatrist? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizqly/should_i_still_see_this_psychiatrist/ |
wildfire155 | Like I need hyperactivity-proof chapstick because I spend HOURS a day just zoning out and ripping my lips apart, and if I could find the right chapstick that actually keeps my lips from peeling, that would be extremely helpful. Or do you guys have any planners you like? Products that help you stay organized, focused, etc? I find the best success when I can life hack the shit out of my crazy little brain so I would love to steal any ideas you guys have. | 2021-12-18T04:41:10.000Z | rizjt9 | 758 | 892 | ADHD | Ok this question is WAY overdue: what are your best adhd-hack products that you use?? | 0.99 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizjt9/ok_this_question_is_way_overdue_what_are_your/ |
Meebeam | Just a concern: My daughter just started on Methylphenidate. Just 10mg non XR. She’s only 10. I come from a long line of ADHDers and am diagnosed and medicated myself. I guess my question is, are there any studies or people on here with experience on long term brain developmental changes in children who are medicated with stimulants and then go off of them as adults? I’m skipping ahead a little, but it worries me that someday she’ll develop some form of depression or something if she tries to stop taking them. 🥺 I know, seems kind of silly considering I know first hand the issues that can develop from not treating ADHD. Any help is appreciated! | 2021-12-18T04:39:00.000Z | rizikr | 9 | 3 | ADHD | Long Term Brain Developmental Changes | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizikr/long_term_brain_developmental_changes/ |
mednerd02 | (f17), I was just diagnosed with adhd (a mix but mainly inattentive) and was prescribed 18mg Concerta, she told me to go back in 3-4 weeks for a follow up. I have really bad imposter syndrome and i constantly tell myself im faking this or that or im being overdramatic and it doesn’t help that my parents constantly invalidate me. on top of that i was looking at side effects and whatnot annd that’s made my anxiety about it all a lot worse hahahahaha 😐 | 2021-12-18T04:29:59.000Z | rizd1d | 3 | 1 | ADHD | Anxiety towards starting Concerta | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizd1d/anxiety_towards_starting_concerta/ |
tarawrashley | "Please remember,
Grades don't measure your intelligence. They measure how you scored on an examination.
If you do badly on an exam, you are just a person who did badly on an exam.
Exams are not a matter of life or death. Even a low score on an important exam is not the end of the world. It usually means only a delay."
This is my first exam in almost 10 years because it took me that long to decide to go back to school post high school. I have terrible test/exam anxiety made worse by the fact that I never learned proper study skills bc "I either knew it, or I didn't" and have been silently stewing and worrying myself to death over failing this exam (& the class)
I think sometimes we all need to be kinder to ourselves and the small blurb my professor left has actually helped reduce the amount of anxiety I'm feeling over it.
It's just an exam. I'm not stupid. My adhd does not make me any less intelligent just because I cannot (potentially) memorize and remember every single thing that was said by 20 different people about 20 different facets of law.
*grades don't measure your intelligence*
ETA: thanks for the wholesome award kind stranger 💘 | 2021-12-18T04:29:10.000Z | rizckg | 19 | 160 | ADHD | I have a law exam tomorrow & ofc I've left studying till almost last minute. My professor left us a little "pep-talk" at the end of the Exam Review Slides that I think we could all benefit from hearing: | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rizckg/i_have_a_law_exam_tomorrow_ofc_ive_left_studying/ |
HelloKamesan | As spoken by my otherwise lovely wife after giving me a laundry list of the symptoms that I occasionally cite as something she sometimes experiences... Yeah, I know, "everybody's a little ADHD sometimes..."
I know where she's coming from. Me being diagnosed and medicated just happened last year in our 16-year (19-year if we include courtship) relationship. I know that she's still digesting my awkward as heck relationship with my meds (I changed medications a couple months ago and still adjusting...). Prior to that, I've never "needed" medication every single day. She's a natural foods/healthy food nut. I know logically that she meant to tell me to accept and love myself as I am, and she's worried about long term effects and my health. While I appreciate that, it was hurtful in ways I don't think she can ever understand... (which is another one of my lines she doesn't like hearing from me...)
I've dealt with the ADHD symptoms and issues that go along with them all my life - always sensing that there's just something wrong with me and that I'd never truly fit into this society at large. Just "accepting it as part of my unique personality" without attributing those issues to ADHD to me sound like just accept the fact that I'm a forgetful (bad short-term working memory - EDIT: and had to add this as I remembered later LOL), lazy-ass, flaky-as-all-getout space-cadet who has absolutely no sense of time and can get totally focused on something to not be able to notice anything else going on to the point of running to the bathroom at the very last moment and can get wildly emotional at random or totally overshare information.
Okay, meds help me with enough focus that I've been slowly but surely whittling away at the years of paperwork that was piling on my desk/floor, and I can function at least marginally better (still doesn't help with time-blindness unfortunately which is THE thing that I get downgraded to hell for at work). This diagnosis and knowing there's a whole community of people who share my issues/experience the world in a similar way have been a Godsend to me - to know that even if those things might still be true, it's not just that I'm a total quirk of a worthless human being (even if it's just a bit of schadenfreude - sorry, not sorry...). At least I can identify these things better now and can take steps to slow things down when they get overwhelming, but even I'm still digesting how to relate with this and myself. It's like self-discovery all over again all while I'm in my mid-40's (hello, midlife crisis...).
I've debated whether I should put this out there but nobody I know would understand - but I know y'all would. Don't get me wrong, I still love my wife dearly and it's not like she's getting mean or abusive. It's been a bit of a touchy subject for us in the home and dealing with the fallout from issues at work has been tough. Feels like I can never be satisfactory, like a permanent problem employee. It's been a tough 21 months since my current (at least as of this past week) work situation... Thought about quitting... still do to some extent. Not sure where I'd go next if I did. Anyway, sorry for the rambling... Hopefully the new workplace (same employer, different work environment) is going to work out better. Have a good weekend, y'all! | 2021-12-18T04:24:27.000Z | riz9v0 | 1 | 3 | ADHD | Why Can't You Just Say That It's Your Unique Personality...? | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riz9v0/why_cant_you_just_say_that_its_your_unique/ |
dorfmcpumpkin | im so fucking sick of just feeling like im about to fly off the fucking handle any time anything goes wrong. today one of the spark plugs in my car went as I was on my way to the city for a nice day out. i wasn't in the best mindset and it completely flipped me.
in that moment all I wanted to do was boot a fucking hole in my car door. if its not outwards out bursts its internal and brings back thoughts of self destruction and mutilation. i am so fucking tired. im just. tired. i work so hard all the time and I always struggle to keep up with the middle of the pack.
im having a hard time lately. ill be safe. i just needed to put this out into the world. im not ok and I hate that I have to pretend that it doesn't bother me or that it hasn't ruined my mood. | 2021-12-18T04:00:12.000Z | riyudp | 3 | 9 | ADHD | adhd and mood swings | 0.86 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyudp/adhd_and_mood_swings/ |
Putrid-Government-15 | Hey there!
So I’m a 24 year old Latino immigrant bio student, now living in Florida. I was just diagnosed about 6 months ago and I honestly always knew that I was different somehow, both in Venezuela and here in the US.
My dad is an interesting character though. I know it isn’t entirely his fault, as the society there is kinda ridiculous! Especially as we didn’t live in the capital city. As the man, he was expected to discipline harshly his children, and oh boy I remember he did (not physical abuse at all). I can assure you that he at least does not have ADHD, but maybe other untreated disorders.
My mom does seem to have ADHD PI, and their marriage have been stable, yet with weird dynamics as I can’t really confirm to you that it is a loving marriage. They still together though and they treat each other like best friends and seem happyish on being together, but I don’t see that passion or love for each other, and I never had.
In school, I did perform fairly well and was well behaved, and every teacher and counselor told me I had much potential, as “without studying you’re smart,” but I did study, only just at the last minute, with the same level of retention as studying for 2 weeks (believe me, I tried). I was seen as normal, educated and well behaved to all adults, but I did came out as annoying and weird for most of my classmates. Many reasons were in play, but the main ones were that I wasn’t good at sports or some video games because I got easily distracted and very bored after a little while. As you can tell, I did build up resentment because of that, even if I didn’t show it externally.
Unfortunately, I’m not proud to say that I became kinda predatory at 12-13, but not in the physical bullying game, more on the trynna tell you “I’m unpredictable” kinda way, and I did choose my “victims.” It’s kinda fucked up but I saw it as a game, a type of bonding which I see it was one-sided in retrospective. It consisted on me researching ways on inflicting painful stimuli without damaging the skin or leaving bruises randomly, either on the hallways or during recess (to be fair, I wasn’t the only one, but I did become fixated, maybe as a cry for help in socialization). At first, I noticed some saw me as cool, but over time I became just weird and a “psycho.” I’m really not sure how I never was caught, even though I was careful, I was still a kid. I don’t even think my parents know about it, and I think that is worse.. I should’ve been apprehended, no matter how mild it might have been.
I had a relationship with a girl for 3 years (I was 16, almost 17 when we ended), which left me heartbroken and super closed off ever since as she cheated on me with an older guy, who funny enough came out as homosexual recently. I dedicated myself on studying, although the maximum grade I’ve ever got is similar to an American B+; however, with all its flaws, I was still a good enough candidate in my country for Med School (not as competitive as here).
For obvious reasons, I moved from Venezuela to the US when I was 18 (legally, my mom is Cuban), and although I don’t quite fit perfectly here, somehow I feel a bit more understood. My “best friends” from there have lost all contact with me, even after I wasn’t an asshole anymore and prioritized them every time, even at my own cost.
Anyways, the culture is very different and people are more distant here, yet I do feel more compassion given, even though I still don’t have many friends. Since I’ve started treatment, I’ve felt much better and way less irritable.
Many of the negative emotions have decreased, yet I’m still overly cynical, emotionally unattached and sometimes seeing others as opportunities rather than meaningful connection.
I did have a huge issue with my dad recently, I showed some anger over the phone related to my job and nothing to do with him, and now he is giving me the silent treatment because he “doesn’t deal with oversensitive people,” even though he has shown even more frustration and anger towards his job too, which he keeps because of me as I live with them and try to pay for many of my expenses (I actually feel like a parasite).
To make things worse, I might not even be accepted in medical school, as my gpa is a low 3.2. I had this semester with straight As, yet it only raised a 0.1 as I’m a senior, graduating this spring.
Financially, a mess. I tried starting a print on demand business with my family, yet I’m the only one that is computer literate, so I’m the only one working on that. I scribe but the payment is really bad. I’m applying on research labs but the chances to be accepted with my limited experience is nonexistant. I tried crypto, with some gains that went to the drain. I have an NFT project done in photoshop, yet I don’t know shit about coding nor anyone seems interested (heck, not even interested if I exist). 2 car accident this year, now I’m in serious debt and more dependable than ever + really bad habits on spending money on pleasure. Religion helps for a bit, but my brain sees it as just an illusion.
I’m scheduled for my first session of CBT in January, I really hope it helps me. I just want to see the world with a better perspective (sometimes I feel this at the peak of calmness with adderall).
I don’t want to be a depressed, angry cynic for the rest of my life, but I fear I’m always late.
I’m so sorry for the lengthy post, this is the most open I’ve ever been | 2021-12-18T03:59:52.000Z | riyu5l | 3 | 3 | ADHD | ADHD and dark cognitive distortions | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyu5l/adhd_and_dark_cognitive_distortions/ |
[deleted] | [removed] | 2021-12-18T03:55:10.000Z | riyr94 | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Does appetite loss happen day 1 on Straterra? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyr94/does_appetite_loss_happen_day_1_on_straterra/ |
BreakHelpful7620 | I was gaming with some classmates today and i managed to score a late minute winner. I put my mic down, jumped of my chair and started being very excited. Unfortunately when i put my mic back on everyone were saying how i was a loud weirdo etc and asking who invited me. I have this problem for a long time where i am uncontrollably loud/active and i also stutter/talk really fast. If someone has advice how i can fight this and overcome these it would really help! Wether its a book, a medicine or a certain exercise everything is welcome! | 2021-12-18T03:51:36.000Z | riyoxo | 8 | 10 | ADHD | How can i stop being loud when excited and stop stuttering #ADHD | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyoxo/how_can_i_stop_being_loud_when_excited_and_stop/ |
Altruistic-Figure356 | So, my doctor recently told me to start taking a 10mg booster dose around noon. To help with my crash after 5 to 8 hours. My job sometimes calls for long hour days and I have a semiflexable schedule, ie work from 8am to 11am break until 1pm or 2pm and work until 6pm. I've noticed that I'm focus from my morning dose until I go to bed at 11pm. Which is exhausting, I feel like I hyperfocus on everything, even simple boring task. I just ask because my family was very against medication and my doctor just started maternity leave. Is the hyperfocus all day normal? | 2021-12-18T03:50:45.000Z | riyodj | 2 | 1 | ADHD | Over medicated? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyodj/over_medicated/ |
dreamingofhogwarts | I'm a 20 year old female university student and around this time in the semester I always feel like I'm hanging onto a thread.
When exams are more spaced out and I can focus on only studying for one at a time and have enough time to not feel anxious, I do relatively well - however, when I have back to back exams like during the last ~3 weeks I barely sleep more than 2-4 hours a night.
I spend all day procrastinating. I sit at my desk with my learning material on the screen and loose focus after 5 minutes. Then I spend a couple of minutes on my phone that turn into half an hour, overeat, get overwhelmed and before I know it's 3 am and I've gotten nothing done.
Today were my last two exams before Christmas break and I'm so sleep deprived that I just feel irritable, numb, nauseous and over energized at the same time. The best part is that our professor assigned yet another project that's due until right after the holidays on top of the five others I already need to do. I need a break. I know I won't get one. I am so tired.
How can I get better at actually getting some work done? I can't go on like this, has anyone had success with creating good habits? | 2021-12-18T03:48:07.000Z | riymqa | 5 | 33 | ADHD | My procrastination has completely ruined my circadian rhythm. I feel physically sick. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riymqa/my_procrastination_has_completely_ruined_my/ |
cbpa07 | Hello all!
I’m a 24 year old that is feeling very concerned since I’ve noticed that my long term memory is borderline nonexistent (almost like I don’t remember my life)
For a background, I’m a fit guy,l that drinks 3x a week and smokes once a week.
I’m curious if adhd makes an impact on long-term memory? Like my friends and family will talk about memories or stories that I don’t recall. I also struggle telling stories from conversations that happened with someone or recall things from a few weeks back. | 2021-12-18T03:42:54.000Z | riyji3 | 4 | 6 | ADHD | Memory issues and adhd? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyji3/memory_issues_and_adhd/ |
Due-Ice-761 | It started off with me accidentally posting a little too spicy of a slightly nsfw meme in a discord server I’m in a *lot* and have formed friendships in and the mods decided it was too much and they took it down, but then proceeded to be shady and snide about in chat and pretty much hinted to them talking shit about it/me in the private mod chat.
Then when ranting to my friend after her repeatedly insisting that I talk to her and vent it out she left me on read, no explanation just decided she didn’t want to listen to me rant.
Then again when explaining to my other friend in our designated rant gc when telling them I’m worried I caught COVID she out right told me to shut the fuck up because she was going through a crisis of her own and couldn’t deal with me/ didn’t want to listen to my bs at that time.
I just feel like a social fuck up, like everyone hates me, like I can’t say or do anything right, like everyone is pointing their fingers at me, and I have been in tears, in a panic, and in a borderline rage fit for close to 2 or 3 hours now. I want to exit out of every group chat and server I’m in because they obviously all hate me. I literally want to disappear of embarrassment. I’m literally never talking to anyone ever again about anything personal, fuck everyone they don’t deserve to know anything that goes on with me.
Update/ the discord mod who flagged my post dm’d me and since I was in too much of a panic to immediately reply she sent another message asking me to “confirm” I seen her first message. And like I get it, they want to keep the community safe and clean but it’s hard for me to explain that made me feel like shit without them thinking I’m just attacking them for doing their job. So I sent back a very short sweet polite “yeah sorry I was working on stuff, it won’t happen again!” message as my hands shook terribly :(
Does anyone else have experiences of it being triggered over and over again? | 2021-12-18T03:40:31.000Z | riyi04 | 1 | 0 | ADHD | RSD killing me, it’s been triggered 3 times tonight. Currently crying on the bathroom floor. | 0.4 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyi04/rsd_killing_me_its_been_triggered_3_times_tonight/ |
Aaronm121 | Currently waiting on a psychiatric diagnosis after being referred by a psychologist who said he’s 100% sure I have ADHD-Pi. I’m quite excited by the whole thing but it also seems sooo far away as I can’t get an appointment until the end of January. I’d love to hear some before and after medication stories that encapsulate the feeling of medication working and how it changed your life. | 2021-12-18T03:39:08.000Z | riyh34 | 3 | 1 | ADHD | Before and after meds | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyh34/before_and_after_meds/ |
Smiley-5 | The title says it all!!! Im so frustrated with myself all the time dealing with this😭😭 Im very hyperactive when making conversations to people especially my coworkers I wanna talk to them properly without jumping from topic to topic but I cant help it my brain goes from one thing to another. Idk how to fix this properly 😭 it definitely affects my communications towards the people and I want to be better and work on myself with this. | 2021-12-18T03:39:03.000Z | riyh1i | 3 | 9 | ADHD | I HATE HOW I CANT COMMUNICATE PROPERLY | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyh1i/i_hate_how_i_cant_communicate_properly/ |
ThrowawayStepMomma | My partner and I were together for four years. I was diagnosed as ADHD inattentive at the age of 20, and have undergone therapy for years as well as medication. My partner recently got diagnosed this year at the age of 47. Prior to this last three months we have been going strong and working towards a future together. He has been going through a lot recently trying to begin a second act after losing his job. And I have had a lot of issues with my health and my job security. My partner kept beating himself up over his feelings of inadequacy and chronic overwhelmed. I continued to remind him that he is enough for me and to be open about how he felt as well as recognizing the highs and lows of life. He is now saying he doesn't have the energy to deal with everything. My ADHD reaction is to pour my heart out and basically hyper-fixate. How do I get him to realize that what he is feeling is textbook ADHD overload? That it is simply because things are just hard and not because things aren't good. | 2021-12-18T03:37:31.000Z | riyg58 | 5 | 6 | ADHD | Untreated ADHD is ruining my 4 year relationship, how do I salvage this? | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyg58/untreated_adhd_is_ruining_my_4_year_relationship/ |
yogurteian | I hate doing it and I dread it. Doing quick math in my head sucks ass even when its just with picking the right coins. I've gotten yelled at so much over it cuz I need to take time with it and can't just do it in 2 seconds like everyone else. Its gotten better but there's definitely times where I find it very difficult to think with all the noise in my store and so much going on. Today I had someone shout "what's wrong with you?" Over and over as I tried.
Edit : spelling | 2021-12-18T03:33:49.000Z | riydse | 3 | 2 | ADHD | Counting change as a cashier | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riydse/counting_change_as_a_cashier/ |
[deleted] | [removed] | 2021-12-18T03:29:20.000Z | riyat6 | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Is it possible adderall is still in my system? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riyat6/is_it_possible_adderall_is_still_in_my_system/ |
everhopeful0618 | I'm 45 year old woman (NZ) and have just been diagnosed. Started taking ritalin 3 days ago. Day 1 and 2 I took 5mg in morning and lunchtime. Today 10mgs each time. Day 1 I felt a weird mix of anxiety and calmness but feel quite conscious of myself. Like I don't fully trust myself in conversation. My head definitely feels calmer but with strange bursts of energy and euphoria. Part of me keeps questioning if I'm reacting like this maybe I don't have adhd. Taking such a low dose but I really feel it. Does it level out over time? | 2021-12-18T03:24:47.000Z | riy81z | 2 | 2 | ADHD | Initial experience of ritalin ... looking for other people's experiences | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy81z/initial_experience_of_ritalin_looking_for_other/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2021-12-18T03:22:07.000Z | riy68i | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Adderall xr and Ir m9xed | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy68i/adderall_xr_and_ir_m9xed/ |
mednerd02 | [removed] | 2021-12-18T03:20:32.000Z | riy56v | 1 | 1 | ADHD | newly diagnosed and it doesn’t feel real. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy56v/newly_diagnosed_and_it_doesnt_feel_real/ |
thequantumlady | Been married for several years and my husband recently got diagnosed with ADD a few months ago.
**Context**
To tell a bit about myself for context, I am fairly high-functioning with bipolar 2 so I'm not unfamiliar with mental health issues myself, as I had much worse depression in the last 10 years of my schooling. Since I graduated and transitioned to the working world, my life has been much better. So much better that I rarely get depressed and only get hypomanic with certain triggers (can't always predict or avoid them, but it's better).
My husband is an immigrant, so for a while when he initially came here he couldn't work and that made him depressed. He eventually got a work permit and a job (not necessarily required due to my salary, but we both like to work) but his job turned out to be very stressful. He works remotely, as well, while I have to work in the office, so he's stuck at home pretty much all the time. So he has a lot of very valid reasons to have issues, and I'm not trying to discount it. Once he got diagnosed ADD and started some medication he got a bit better, but he's still working on it.
My problem is that his behavior does affect my life as well and I'm not sure how to properly cope with it without hurting his feelings or making him feel bad. Never was good at that, I guess.
We both make a salary that's more than enough to support us but I make almost twice as much as him because I work full-time, do consulting a few hours a week, and run a mostly passive online business that's doing well, so I'm trying to grow it. My full-time job is less stressful, but I still have a lot on my plate. In my free time, I usually like to work on my business because it's a bit of a hobby. My husband likes to watch shows or play videogames in his free time. And a lot of times we do those things together.
**Problem**
My issue is... the housework and general management of our life together.
Both of us work, so it can be tough to stay on top of it. And even though I work a lot more hours every week, I'm not trying to say I can't do any of it. I actually do almost all of it most of the time. I just want him to contribute more because I do so much. I would cook dinner every single night at home (until recently, because I'm burning out), I try to do a little bit of vacuuming or tidying everyday, I usually put my dishes right in the dishwasher, etc. But my husband does significantly less to contribute.
He'll get into random cleaning marathons on a weekend, but then do barely anything for weeks. I also do things like keeping track of finances, the mortgage, insurance, etc. which is partially because of his immigration, but not entirely. He speaks perfect English, btw, so it's not a language issue.
I just... I am really tired, *so tired*, of coming home from work or coming downstairs to see the house a mess. Or spending the weekend getting everything in order just for it to go to shit again right away. It makes all of my efforts feel pointless and so sometimes I just say "fuck it" and don't do chores either, which obviously makes it even worse. And to be the main person responsible for managing our lives... if something goes wrong with that, it's on me. Like... I would not call my husband lazy but I guess I'm just so frustrated.
When I try to talk to him about it, he says he's trying. And I'm torn because on some level I want to be understanding of his ADD but I also don't know where to draw the line between genuine ADD issues and self-defeating beliefs justifying laziness without hurting his feelings. Because every time I try to bring up *my* feelings about how I feel like I'm doing more (which he acknowledges and agrees on) it always goes back to him "working on his ADD" or he gets offended.
I'm a human too, I have my own mental issues I deal with. I have feelings as well. I'm not perfect either. So I am getting emotionally tired of trying to let go and have him realize it on his own vs. telling him the truth and complaining about how much work I do. I just don't know what to do. I'm generally reliable but I'm slowly crumbling under the pressure of making sure absolutely everything in our joint life stays put together, alone.
I wouldn't say our marriage is in peril as we tend to fight infrequently. But I don't want this to develop into a more serious marriage issue over time. And I obviously want us both to be satisfied.
What should I do to support him? And how can I help him help *us* so we can have a successful relationship *together*? | 2021-12-18T03:18:26.000Z | riy3v5 | 8 | 4 | ADHD | Not sure how to cope with my husband's ADD | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy3v5/not_sure_how_to_cope_with_my_husbands_add/ |
ShyPurple123 | so I (14ftm) have recently found myself having a maybe crush on another kid in my grade (15m). Id consider us closer to acquaintances then friends, but ive known him since 6th grade. We rarely talk outside of drama club after school, but ive found myself thinking about him more and wanting to talk to him more. some of my 'symptoms' in this situation include my mind going back to him a ton, a weird feeling in my stomach whenever i think about him/see him, getting 'jealous' when i see him talking to one of his (girl) friends, overanalyzing everything he does around me, etc. Every crush ive had has been faked to not seem weird to my friends, so i have no clue what its supposed to feel like. how do i tell if this is a hyperfixation or a crush?? | 2021-12-18T03:15:37.000Z | riy23a | 2 | 1 | ADHD | crush or hyperfixation? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy23a/crush_or_hyperfixation/ |
titty_mclitty | [removed] | 2021-12-18T03:14:44.000Z | riy1gk | 0 | 1 | ADHD | RSD acting up, it’s been triggered 3 times tonight. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy1gk/rsd_acting_up_its_been_triggered_3_times_tonight/ |
Ima_Funt_Case | I just want to rant real quick. My *GENERIC* Adderall XR prescription, without insurance, would be $404, and IR is $46 ($5400/yr). "Fortunately" I'm so broke I qualify for the state medicare and it doesn't cost me a penny. I'm terrified of getting a job and making too much money to continue to qualify for the state medicare which is significantly better than any health insurance I would be forced to buy otherwise. I don't know how people do it, and I realize how fortunate I am to have the access to care that I do since many people are unable to even get that. It's so fucked, and it just makes me want to fight so much more for people. **We need M4A, we need better mental healthcare access, we need controlled prescription drug pricing, and we need to destroy the big pharma cartel that has a stranglehold on the country.** | 2021-12-18T03:13:43.000Z | riy0su | 4 | 21 | ADHD | American healthcare is abysmal (but you already know that). | 0.88 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riy0su/american_healthcare_is_abysmal_but_you_already/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2021-12-18T03:02:17.000Z | rixtba | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Appetite suppression | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rixtba/appetite_suppression/ |
wildfire155 | [removed] | 2021-12-18T02:53:41.000Z | rixnju | 1 | 1 | ADHD | Ok this question is WAY overdue: what are your best adhd-hack products that you use?? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rixnju/ok_this_question_is_way_overdue_what_are_your/ |
Reasonable-Slice-827 | Maybe this combines with impulsiveness as well as problems with time blindness.
I can't think far enough ahead to remember where I parked my car AS I park it, and end up having to search the whole parking lot for it when I've finished shopping. If someone asked me where it was, I could tell them it's in the parking lot at least.
I could never imagine getting older, and each year almost feels like a mild surprise to me.
Monthly bills always feel like surprises even tho I can afford them.
I have many ADHD symptoms and will be evaluated soon, but I thought I would ask how to categorize this specific symptom. | 2021-12-18T02:43:26.000Z | rixgvj | 2 | 4 | ADHD | I've never been able to truely "think ahead". | 0.76 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rixgvj/ive_never_been_able_to_truely_think_ahead/ |
I_Am_Hella_Bored | [removed] | 2021-12-18T02:38:01.000Z | rixder | 1 | 1 | ADHD | How does medication actually work? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rixder/how_does_medication_actually_work/ |
RobertQuayle | Hello,
I'm 23 years old and have recently been diagnosed with High-Functioning ADHD. I initially sought help because of my inability to focus and stay on task. I've created this reddit account because I just need advice and answers, I'm still coming to terms with this diagnosis. From what my Doctor has told me this encompasses more aspects of my life than I was aware.
​
I'm an extremely motivated and driven person, however I've always felt like I'm just not working to my full potential, like I'm capable of more but it's locked away and I don't know how to access it. I also have the extreme tenancy to hyper-focus on things that interest me, and when I'm in that mindset holy- do I get. things. done. However, rarely see things though to completion, I loose interest very fast then find something new to hyper-focus on, its a continuous destructive cycle and I just can't continue like this. My doctor explained to me that ADHD is usually diagnosed in children through school, however due to mine being high-functioning it would of gone unnoticed due to the fact I was achieving milestones, barely to add, and was mostly written off by teachers as just lazy and disruptive.
​
I do not feel ADHD has hindered me, more so it's holding me back. I have a masters degree in Software Engineering, a well paid job, nice car, solid relationship with my girlfriend but I'm extremely unfulfilled. I've attributed this due to inability to concentrate. I want to progress my career and to achieve that I need to up-skill by studying which I find extremely hard, the thing is I want to study this stuff, I just cant stay on task, I'm able to focus for maybe 1 solid hour in the morning then find myself just procrastinating on TikTok for the rest of the day and I hate myself for it. Only completing work assignments when deadlines arise, I just want to be overall more engaged because I know motivation is not the problem.
​
Look I wont waste your time any further because if you're anything like me you are extremely impatient. My doctor has prescribed me Concerta XL, currently been on it for two days at 18mg, I feel nothing. I've been instructed to raise the dosage to 36mg next week however I assume my sweet-spot will most likely be 54mg if at all. I've been doing research into how people with high-functioning ADHD manage their symptoms and was actually very surprised to find out a lot of successful people also have ADHD, Richard Branson and Bill Gates for example including many others, however most of them proclaim to be substance free, they manage their symptoms naturally however I'm not sure I'm capable of that. My doctor point blanc stated to me "to put things into perspective I consult hundreds of people with ADHD and you're the most ADHD I've seen this week." I NEED to get my concentration under control however I'm scared going on medication will decrease my creativity and I'll loose my ability to hyper-focus which is something I refuse to loose, I consider it a super power honestly, I just want to learn how to control it.
​
Please, if you're reading this you have no idea how much I value your advice/experiences if you are/have been in the same position. Thank you in advance.
\-Robert | 2021-12-18T02:31:12.000Z | rix8wo | 3 | 2 | ADHD | High-Functioning ADHD advice? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rix8wo/highfunctioning_adhd_advice/ |
Licensed_Ignorance | Hello everyone! I've been struggling a lot with everyday life, I'm 22 and feel like I've spent my entire life on "hard mode". Long story short, I've been seeing a psychiatrist, and it looks like I'm likely gonna be diagnosed with adult ADHD.
The problem is I dont know what to make of this, I can't exactly differentiate what is a common everyday struggle that everyone goes through, and what is actually something beyond that.
So....for those that are diagnosed, and are effected by ADHD what was your life like before being diagnosed and getting treatment? | 2021-12-18T02:28:35.000Z | rix75o | 8 | 1 | ADHD | What does your everyday life with ADHD look like? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rix75o/what_does_your_everyday_life_with_adhd_look_like/ |
DucklingButt | [removed] | 2021-12-18T02:19:02.000Z | rix0v7 | 1 | 1 | ADHD | what’s your myers-briggs? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/rix0v7/whats_your_myersbriggs/ |
popcorn_queen | I just wanted to share the good news!
I just finished my final exam for a college class. It took me a while to figure this out, but I can only handle one class per semester. It was online, which made it even harder. It's very difficult to keep working when I'm at home and not in the classroom, but that's the only way to take classes right now.
The upside of virtual classes is that everything is graded almost immediately. I passed the class with a grade of 98%. 😊 | 2021-12-18T02:17:17.000Z | riwzm4 | 8 | 80 | ADHD | Just passed my class! | 0.99 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwzm4/just_passed_my_class/ |
TheSuperiorRobo | Oh boy, yet another rant about school because I just gotta say some stuff. So right now my grades are... I'd say they're acceptable, my mom would probably say they're terrible lol, and my dad would just agree with her. I have all A's and B's except for 2 C's (one in English and one in Creative Photo). One of those C's was from my average getting tanked by a poor grade on an English paper, and the other was from an assignment that I physically didn't have the time to do because I was absent when we did it, and we did stuff every day during class.
Tangent aside, I was ready to accept those as my quarter 2 grades. The world's not gonna implode if only my 3rd out of 8 semesters in high school is slightly subpar, my psychiatrist can literally write something that tells colleges to ignore my performance during this part of high school because I wasn't getting the treatment I needed (Yes, he can actually do that. Really gonna miss him when he retires in the spring), and honestly I really don't give enough of a shit to be ridiculously stressed by it.
HOWEVER, my English teacher decided to be a fucking nice person and let us remediate our essays, and accept remediations until January 1st. So guess what my mom's gonna make me do over the weekend, because she has an unhealthy obsession with my grades and literally loses sleep over numbers on a screen that don't even affect her? That's right, I've gotta revise a fucking essay. And I didn't even plan for it either.
I thought since we were doing midterms, and it's about to be winter break, that I was finally done. I thought a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I thought for the first time in forever, I could have a breather during my massive fucking burnout. BUT NO! After beating me to a pulp, the school had to throw one last punch, just because it's a little shitter.
Now sometimes I feel like maybe I don't care enough about school, but according to like all my friends and some of the people of reddit (who I thing might be correct), my mom just cares too much and I feel like I don't care enough in comparison. I had a way to link this into my rant but I forgot it.
But yeah, my parents are in their room talking (probably about me let's be honest). I just need a break, man. I just wanna be able to sit at my computer and make Minecraft texture packs without it being in procrastination and feeling worried.
TL;DR I thought I was done with schoolwork until after winter break. I was wrong. Fuck this shit. | 2021-12-18T02:16:29.000Z | riwz46 | 1 | 2 | ADHD | Thought I was finally getting a breather from school, but NOPE! Fuck this shit honestly | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwz46/thought_i_was_finally_getting_a_breather_from/ |
brruh420 | I don’t think it’s productive to have a black and white attitude towards medication, I really don’t. All my life, I have had no sense of urgency and basically just 0 drive or motivation to achieve my goals. Meds definitely helped instill that drive into me, honestly getting that “taste” of what being driven feels like was life changing for me so in that sense medication is definitely useful. But in my experience, making useful habits and making small tweaks in my lifestyle has been much more sustainable. It took me a while to get here, I had periods where I just wanted the meds to do the work for me, and i HATED when people gave me unsolicited advice such as “have you tried reading a self help book?”. And i think a lot of us with ADHD have a lot of built up frustration and anger from feeling like we are never able to get it right.
For once, I decided to not be angry. I picked up a self help book. I started using Google Calendar. Started listening to TED talks before going to sleep. Little by little, these little habits started proving themselves to be effective. As simple as it may seem though, it is NOT easy. You have to have so much patience with yourself. You have to not think of how others dont have to work as hard as you. I think a good way to cope with having ADHD is being strict about always putting yourself first. I feel so stupid and like I was late to the party of adulthood every single day. But recognizing my executive dysfunction and taking these little steps to make life easier for me is paying off.
We have to be so patient with ourselves. I wanted to share this because I am honestly so pleasantly surprised and proud of myself for being able to keep up with the smallest daily tasks. I dont wanna beat myself up over how Im behind or “stupid” anymore. It’s so liberating to find out that I dont have to feel like a failure every second of my existence.
Sorry for how disorganized this is | 2021-12-18T02:16:26.000Z | riwz2z | 7 | 18 | ADHD | Changes in lifestyle & habits more effective than medication | 0.79 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwz2z/changes_in_lifestyle_habits_more_effective_than/ |
jackson5621 | Hey guys, i’m going to put some stuff out there about myself and i would really appreciate some feedback. so i’m in the Navy, i have been for a couple years now. I’ve never really felt good at anything, but since being in the Navy, that feeling has amplified to making me feel like a complete screw up. I constantly forget things and feel like it’s way harder for me to do simple things that other people do. it’s gotten really bad, and i’ve gotten to the point where i’m constantly having suicidal thoughts. They started becoming regular when i was about mid deployment and i went to get help and my chain of command basically alienated me, and i’d never been treated weirder in my life. that same day i actually got in trouble from them because i didn’t make my bed that morning. I have had adhd my whole life and i got off of meds when i was about 16. I’ve never felt great at anything but now i just feel like a complete screw up. i thought the suicidal thoughts would go away after i got home from overseas, but they’ve only gotten worse and worse and now i can’t go a day without them. i’m away from my ship for some training, but i’m also depressed because i know i’m gonna have to go back there and i’ve grown to hate that place more than anything. people tend to think i’m very funny but get so annoyed by me or think i’m too much a lot of times. i’ve grown bitter towards everyone who has judged me for my issues. i’m starting to wonder if this is a Navy problem or a me problem, but i just really need some help because i’m pretty desperate right now, and i’ve grown to not trust the people i know in real life with the exception of a few people.This is a cry for help to be honest. | 2021-12-18T02:13:55.000Z | riwxcu | 10 | 3 | ADHD | my adhd and depression | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwxcu/my_adhd_and_depression/ |
ontanned | Overall GPA for the semester is 3.79; only thing I didn't get an A in was Chinese (which was a B+).
I definitely struggled sometimes to keep up with my coursework, but being consistent with Todoist really helped. I went through each class syllabus at the beginning of the semester and put each listed assignment in with the due date. That way I was never overwhelmed with mentally keeping track of each class, I could just look at Todoist and see what I had to do for the day or week.
I also have to give some credit to being medicated for the first time in my life :) I have lingering symptoms for sure and some of the side effects bother me, so I've been meaning to ask my doctor to try changing my regimen, but it finally gave me enough control over my own thoughts and behavior that I don't *constantly* feel like I'm fighting my own brain (only some of the time). | 2021-12-18T02:06:43.000Z | riwsku | 2 | 43 | ADHD | Got nearly straight A's this semester! | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwsku/got_nearly_straight_as_this_semester/ |
Rogue_SHAG | I was just explaining to someone that wants to help me- because he thinks I've been stressing alot and that it causes me to lose a significant weight- that I might have ADHD, and the stress comes from me hating myself about how my brain works.
His response: You definitely don't have ADHD.
Uhm, okay. I have 2 friends with ADHD I explained how my brain works, they were like it's scary how similar our brains work. They explained not everyone thinks like us (which shocked me! (Like what is silence in your head like omg???)). Also my GP was like yea... You need a ADHD evaluation...
My friend keeps insisting that I'm fine, I can't have ADHD, if I get that "label" it will be a slap in the face.
I exited the conversation. Because he's making my feel like absolute shite. I am surrounded by people with the same attitude as him, which makes my journey to my diagnosis even harder. He's the only one that bluntly said it out loud. | 2021-12-18T02:00:51.000Z | riwodz | 3 | 3 | ADHD | You don't have ADHD | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwodz/you_dont_have_adhd/ |
firebired_sweet | I actually laughed out loud when this lady asked if I still had record of my diagnosis. I’m nearly 30, haven’t had meds for years because I didn’t have health insurance. It’s been a vicious cycle of trying to hold jobs, being unable to contain my frustrations and memory problems, and not having insurance. My problems with employment pretty much started when I aged out of my parents insurance and couldn’t get access to meds again. I’ve been struggling with depression as a result of years without any treatment. I’m at the end of my rope here. My parents aren’t responding to my questions about records of my diagnosis. My mom doesn’t believe adhd is the reason for my problems as an adult. It’s also extremely difficult for me to get help from a therapist or psychiatrist where I live because it’s very remote. I just don’t know what to do. Idk, I just need some support right now. | 2021-12-18T01:51:41.000Z | riwi6u | 3 | 3 | ADHD | I’m trying to get back on meds and was told to find record of my diagnosis from middle school | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwi6u/im_trying_to_get_back_on_meds_and_was_told_to/ |
burbalamb | Usually for me once one minor inconvenience happens I get unnecessarily upset then it’s like every thing after that is an inconvenience and I end up being frustrated/frazzled/irritated for a couple weeks then I’m fine. Haven’t figured out how to manage my anger. How long does frustration last for you? How do you manage it? I’m not on my meds rn for unimportant reasons, I know taking them would help. But Regardless I need to learn strategies for controlling my emotions. | 2021-12-18T01:45:34.000Z | riwe82 | 7 | 1 | ADHD | How long does irritability last for y’all? | 0.57 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwe82/how_long_does_irritability_last_for_yall/ |
DKSigh51 | For three years I’ve basically remained stagnant. If I lost my job today, I feel like I’d be no better than I was 3 years ago. I’m at an hourly job and I’m basically clock in and out and that’s that…I can do more.
I feel like I have the ability to have an impact so much more than I have been making, but it’s as if I either see too much possibility, or if I happen to yolo choose something, I can’t stick to it amidst everything else I can be doing. I feel like I’ve lost all my intuition and trust in myself to be on the right path.
Im also unsure if I’m mentally fooling myself. I believe I can learn to do just about anything and that every occupation has a beautiful noble reason to do it.
It helps when connecting with others because they feel quite relaxed to be themselves around me without judgment but cutting back to me, I don’t know where to put this energy to make my biggest impact.
I could do this because of that, or I could do this because this. But nothing is screaming out to me and it’s been so long since I’ve sort of felt I was doing “the right thing”
I just want to do what’s right. I almost don’t even care what. I find more meaning in doing what needs to be done. I just can’t define what that is.
I feel like I’ve been ruminating this same thought for nearly 8 years. | 2021-12-18T01:45:30.000Z | riwe6f | 3 | 26 | ADHD | I feel like I can do anything, yet I end up doing nothing | 0.95 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwe6f/i_feel_like_i_can_do_anything_yet_i_end_up_doing/ |
Putrid-Government-15 | [removed] | 2021-12-18T01:39:56.000Z | riwaiq | 1 | 1 | ADHD | ADHD and dark cognitive distortions | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riwaiq/adhd_and_dark_cognitive_distortions/ |
CrackedAndBroken | I composed this in response to a question about ADHD and memory on a different subreddit, and I put so much time into it, I wanted to share it as a post! Let me know if you relate to any of this!
I forget things literally dozens of times a day. I have developed so many systems and compensatory behaviors that I almost don't even notice it anymore. But with my recent increased awareness of how ADHD manifests, I have started to realize just how much energy I put into remembering things.
At some point I realized that I will forget just about anything I am about to do, and so I have learned to enact something so that I don't forget it. This usually involves putting something directly in my way in some sort of manner. I am constantly on high alert related to noticing when I am about to forget something.
For example, one time I was upstairs and needed to bring something downstairs. I stopped the other thing I was doing and grabbed the item and held it while I finished up the first thing.* While I was doing that other thing, I remembered there was something downstairs I needed to bring upstairs. I paused to figure out how I was going to make sure I both put the one thing away, and also brought the other thing upstairs, because otherwise I was at risk of putting the thing away and then coming directly back upstairs without picking up the thing I needed to bring with me. I usually call it "auto pilot", and in order to avoid auto pilot kicking in, I need to be very committed to staying out of auto pilot mode.
So I held the downstairs-bound item in my right hand (I'm right-handed) while putting all of my focus on the thing I needed to obtain from downstairs. I knew I had to ignore any other external stimuli. I then grabbed the thing from downstairs with my left hand and placed it on the staircase so I couldn't miss it. Since the item from upstairs was in my right hand, it was harder to ignore, and I remembered to put it away. Had I been holding it in my left hand, I might not have noticed it and I would've gone back upstairs with it as I carried the other item.
If something else had occurred to me during this convoluted escapade, I would've had to pause again (physically stopping in my tracks) to figure out how I was going to stay on track. At that point, I would've probably started chanting the three things to myself over and over again. And I would have had to keep my focus only on the chanting and not let it become background noise.
I use chanting a lot.
And yes, I do things like this literally dozens of times a day. And I am not going to even get started on what I had to do in educational settings when memorization was required.
The big bummer is when I remember things while driving or showering or some other time when I don't have a means of reminding myself. For something like that, I might say to myself, "when I look at the doorknob while entering the house, I will remember xyz," and I will create an image in my mind of the door knob and xyz together. That has about a 50% success rate. Sometimes I will look at the door knob and say, "Wow, there was something I was supposed to remember". But I can't remember what it was.
And even with all of these strategies, I still forget things multiple times a day.
So when people talk about "spoon theory," imagine how many spoons I spend just trying to remember every-day things.
*Note that at this point, in the past, I would have been at risk of just putting down the thing in my hand and not noticing that I had done so. But somewhere along the line I was able to train myself to avoid just putting things down on "auto-pilot". Instead, if I'm holding something in my hand, I've trained myself to (almost) always view it as something important. I am basically not allowed to put something down unless I am being intentional about it. So I stop and look at what's in my hand and pay attention to where I am putting it down, and sort of take a picture of it in my mind so I won't forget where I put it. For this reason, I get very annoyed when things aren't where I placed them, because I'm also terrible at looking for and finding things. This is one of the reasons ADHD can sometimes be mistaken for OCD. | 2021-12-18T01:34:41.000Z | riw739 | 15 | 19 | ADHD | In answer to the question, "For those with ADHD how bad is your memory exactly?" | 0.96 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/riw739/in_answer_to_the_question_for_those_with_adhd_how/ |
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