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Dataset card Data Studio Files
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And if you've kept that from me for 12 years and you're only just telling me now, then maybe you are jealous. Mike, how did you get in? We give you a key already? No, Laura let me in. She said you'd be back here. I don't know why. I'm trying to find something tasty. (CHUCKLES) But not one damn thing that's bad for you...
I get it. Too much money to lay out for too little payoff. But you said you came from the same place as these people. Robert, they need someone like you to fight for them and I can't do it. So, I'm asking you to. You think this case is a winner? I do. Then what do you say we do it together? What are you doing here, Lou...
I came to you like a man, and then when I gave you the chance to make it up to me, you choked, like you always do. Well, how do you like me now? Because the only thing you had left was that you made more and now you don't. And I win. You didn't win anything. What are you talking about? I'm talking about the fact that n...
Mmm. This was six months ago, when you were clear. Here's the scint scan we just did. Two years ago, when you first told me I had cancer? Mental Ward C, Dr. Mesner. Natalie. Hello. Hi. Um... It's... um, the dark spots are where the cancer has spread? Yes, except this is from a patient I saw this morning. This... is ...
Can I get an extra apple? - This is annoying. - So don't read it. Some of us still read things that aren't on screens. Some of us are wondering who died and made you God. Did you know that 300 million sperm attack one single egg to fertilize it? How is that fair? Dunno. But, ultimately, the egg decides which one to l...
Hello? Oh, hi, Auntie Nicole. No, no, everything's great. Just another morning in paradise. Auntie Nicole wants us over for dinner tonight. I have a huge test to study for that'll probably determine my future, but here's Mom. Hi. You sure you wanna go to all that trouble? I understand if you're busy, but I bought all...
We do have a math test tomorrow, but she was probably lying about studying for it. Well, now I'm going to. Diligently. You better. We leave in five. I can't talk right now. He looks normal, but we agreed you weren't gonna do this. Hmm? That lawyer from your firm you wanted me to meet? Oh, right. What was I thinking? ...
You've gotta be kidding me. I didn't know. I swear. Shoes... my shoes. Nice shoes. Come on! I'm not a chauffeur. 60 seconds and I'm gone. You're riding? - What about your sister? - She's 13. She'll be fine - without me. - It's a new school for her. - She's still adjusting. - I'm going out for triathlon, OK? - I need...
- I don't wanna hear you were late again. - Well, I'm sure you won't. She hates that I'm in some of her classes, you know. She's just riding because she joined triathlon. Based on her guitar lesson fail, I give the week. Jayden! I didn't realize you rode this way. It's the hardest way up. - And that's a good thing? - ...
Don't ask. Train wreck. Well, at least you still have the swimsuit portion of the sport. Crap. I took the broken one. Bye, Mom. I love you. - I still can't talk. - I was afraid he kidnapped you. - Whatever random you went home with. - No, but I did get lured into - an accidental home wrecking. - Hmm. What you said th...
Well, at least I know who I am. Are you saying that I don't? Look at your Facebook profile. You used to care so much about your column, but now... Look. Don't get me wrong, OK? I think you are a great mother. I do. I just... sometimes I miss the old version of you. You know? The fun, impulsive Natalie who would buy ...
I bet my mom will need me around this summer, so... Have you asked her? Maybe she'd want you to go. You know, we never do anything fun anymore. At least talk to her. Maybe I will. I'm waiting on inspiration, so I'm getting out of here. What are you doing right now? You picked up the pieces after David left. Raised thre...
Spoil my fun. - That's always the case. It's not fair. - I know, I know. It's just not, it's not. - Cocktail hour already? - It's only rosé. It's basically one step away from herbal tea. - Hi, Natalie. - Hi, Ariel. Young love. - Mom, do you want some wine? - Yes, thanks. I'd hoped to see your kids tonight, Natalie. U...
- Yeah. - Mm, thank you. - We aren't worthy. - Well, speak for yourself. - Actually, she meant me. What was that, Natalie? Tell them. Let's crowdsource this. What? Earlier today, I merely floated the idea that Nat spends a little bit too much time worrying about her - kids at the expense of herself. - Aw, what does th...
- We'll play later, OK? - Simon says... his girlfriend wants to meet you. Simon? - Is that my phone? Sweetie? - Who's Simon? Abigail, hands off other people's things, OK? Go play, sweetie. Must be nice. Life without responsibility. She does her own thing. She always has. You keep letting her off the hook, she's neve...
- Yes. Just do it, just do it. - You sure? - Yep. Whoa, whoa, whoa! You know. Oh, my God! Stop, stop, stop! - Whew. - OK, ready for this one? - You know this one. - OK. Mm-hmm. - Not too high. Not too high! - You can do that. - No! - Just do it. Oh, I can't do this. Stop. ... their power in the centre of galaxies....
Are you in there scandalizing your girlfriend while we're literally sitting 10 feet away, learning about science? Go. Study. Scientists believe... Maybe on the second Earth, he's less of a dick. Yeah, I doubt it. ...the Milky Way. And because we can't readily... - Writing? - Barely. - Goodnight, Ariel. - Goodnight. -...
"Imagine having clarity about knowing who you truly are and what the purpose of your life is." Seriously, you buy this? No, not really. I don't know. I probably won't go. You should. I'll be around. I have summer courses. Thanks. "For the soul." Ms. Lawson. - Natalie. - Sorry to keep you waiting. I'm Andrew Wallace. ...
She tanked on purpose. Spoken with her teachers. There's a consensus Romy's... not adjusting entirely to her new school. Which means? Other than this? Well, she doesn't engage in class and she mostly keeps to herself, I think. After I pushed so hard for her to skip a grade. I know. I was looking at her files. She was...
His name is Lucas Carson, and if you're at all open to the idea, it could be really good for Romy, I think. She's really not going to like that. - Well, no, of course. - What should I tell her about this test? I wouldn't say anything for now. I'll deal with her teachers, and we'll adjust gently. How does that sound? Sa...
What are you afraid of? - I gotta go. - Oh, what? Some other guy? Yeah. Hey! I'm glad you called. I thought you'd like to know I was recently flirted with. How dare he. Wait... don't tell me you actually - enjoyed it. - Shut up. I'm still mad at you. Yeah? Then why call me? Because... - maybe you were right about m...
- Mm. Whatcha working on? Book report. That's always fun. Except for the part where I have to decide - what book to read. - Well, if you need any help... Here's the list my teacher gave me. I was thinking about this one. The Catcher in the Rye. That might be a little dark. This is one of my favourites. - Little Women? ...
Hi, I'm not available. Please leave a message. You hear that, Jim? That's a plate by Adam Fogler, 150 bucks a piece, which I just smashed in our sink. So the next time you decide to not call me and let me know that I'm gonna be eating alone again like a pathetic fool, why don't you ask yourself how much it'll cost to r...
Oh. They got hungry. They went to The Dep for candy... - If I'd known you were... - I'm sorry, I... I'm sorry. Are you hungry? I've got a pretty decent cassoulet here. Yeah, sure. Thanks. - I'll leave it on the counter upstairs. - OK. Whew! Oh, God. Nat! Are you OK? Nat? I'm OK. It's OK. I had an operation two y...
Little bit tired. Tired... like a mother with three kids? You know it. - How are yours doing? - They're good. Hanging in there. Oh! Sorry. There's just - a little bit of pain. - I see that. Yeah, it's 'cause I went boxing. - Boxing. - Yeah, with my sister. Um, it's getting better fast, though. No swelling. Some bru...
I changed my mind. We are not quitting. We are getting in that water and going for a swim. I do see the appeal. Forget about him. Let's do this. Hello? Natalie. It's Andrew. - Wallace? - Hi. Yeah, I recognized your voice. - How are you? - Fine. - And you? - I'm good. I, uh... I heard you went boxing? Oh! You read m...
Great, well, I'll, I'll, er, I'll call you later with some plans, then. - Hmm. - Thank you, Natalie. "Thank you, Natalie." God! What if most of what we tell ourselves is wrong? Well, can we fix that? When is it too late? This isn't easy to write and the temptation to delete the whole thing is great, but forget every wo...
If the biopsy confirms the scan, our first job will be to control the disease, to buy you time. To buy me time. I'm not gonna get better? There are always new treatments. I'm not saying we don't have options, Natalie. You don't have to do this, Norah. OK? Not with me. Just tell me. How much time do I have? It's imposs...
- EXIT - Nurses Station - Ms. Lawson? Are you OK? Yes... yes. I-I'll be fine. I'm sorry about Africa. It was your idea in the first place. I know. I promise it's not about you. I just can't go this year. It's fine. Everything will stay the same, then. On the next This Life... Maggie, I'm dying. You can't tell anyone...
Quick and clean, please, Mr MacKenzie. Oh, Miss, I hope I didn't spoil your evening. Don't worry, Dot, my plans were already sabotaged by an unexpected house guest. But the less said about him, the better. Miss Fisher, what happened to your prior engagement? I dealt with that. Pearl Dyson - magician's assistant, cut of...
It's happening again, isn't it? I knew it was happening again, I knew it! Inspector. Mr MacKenzie, meet Miss Fisher - private detective. And Mr MacKenzie's right-hand woman, Miss Eva Callahan. Callahan. It was once Callahan's Cavalcade of Mysteries, wasn't it? Yes, this was originally my father's show. Oh, what a dread...
Our new investor would be counting on it. We'll do our best, Mr MacKenzie, but I can't guarantee we'll have the case solved by then. Well, we're in financial straits - we have theatre rent and wages. I thought you said you had a new investor. I'll need to speak with him as well. Yes. Well, if you find him, can you sen...
No, I'm just the general dog's body. Didn't they tell you that? Well, you must have picked up a few tips in your time with MacKenzie? I'd be an idiot if I hadn't. As entertaining as this is, Miss Fisher, I have an investigation to get on with. Ah. Careful with that. Are you sure you don't want your turn to star, Sid? ...
Um, work. It's... I'm working. I'm working, sir. Well, have you finished fraternising? Don't be like that. That really is rather a nice tie. So, would you like to take another look at the body with me? Is that an invitation? Well, I could wait all day for yours. Miss Fisher! I've got a mate of yours in the cab. Rec...
MacKenzie was going to recapture the magic with the amazing Ruby. ~ Pearl. ~ Yes, her. What am I going to do now? Go to the theatre and offer the troupe your steadfast support? Well, I'd dearly love to, my dear, but at a time like this I want to be the bearer of happy tidings. And that's not possible? Let's just say th...
~ Good, you're here. For a moment there I thought I stood an even chance. Mac doesn't play favourites, Jack, unlike her predecessor, who never, ever told me anything. I promised to withstand her inveigling and bribery for as long as humanly possible. Telephone me when you have more on Miss Dyson. ~ Of course. ~ But, Ja...
Sid is an aspiring magician and Eva has been grooming him. And what do Sid's aspirations have to do with Miss Callahan? Well, what if they're in cahoots? Eva's been teaching him her father's entire repertoire. If the two of them want to take over the show, then what better way than by sabotaging the Miraculous Mermaid ...
Yeah. That's not the same as doing it. Ah, Inspector? Someone's been very busy over here doing some metal filing. And... .. look what I found in the forest green. A nail head. Hang on, that... that paint's been there for days. ~ You can't pin that on me. ~ Not yet, Mr Forest. But if we do tests on those filings, and t...
~ So, it was you! I was chatting to the concierge about you, Prudence. He spoke very highly. He must have confused our accounts. You don't have an account at the Windsor. As I discovered when the manager accused me of fraud. And, as all my available funds are tied up with MacKenzie's Cavalcade, I have nowhere to lay m...
Thank you, Baron. I'm sorry I doubted you. No harm done. Just a small delay. Ah, now... This is Miss Phryne... Oh, Miss Fisher and I are already very well acquainted, aren't we, my dear? Now, with this awful incident behind us we can think about the Miraculous Mermaid. No, Henry, we can't. It's an extraordinarily da...
Evening, sir. Um, if you wouldn't mind waiting in the parlour, Miss Fisher's been slightly detained. I know you're in here, Sarah. I do apologise, Inspector, I'm sure Miss Fisher will be here shortly. ~ What are you doing here? ~ We were waiting for The Baron. He's given us the slip. Forget The Baron, I've got a paying...
Ah... Is that you? A-achoo! Good morning, Inspector. I've pressed your suit. Thank you, Mr Butler. No trouble at all, sir. Hungry? I can recommend the omelette. ~ Ah... ~ Morning, Jack. How's the head? ~ Miss Fisher. ~ I offered him breakfast. Father, I asked you to wait upstairs! Father. Henry George Fisher - Baron...
~ My father assaulted you. Well, his nerve tonic assaulted you first, but none of it was planned. Who put me in pyjamas? Mr Butler, of course. After I undressed you. Comin' through! Urgent delivery. Good morning. Ah... Why did you take this money? Because it was owed to me and I needed it to send to Pearl's aunty so sh...
But she gave you up for him, didn't she? She was mine. Prepare yourselves, ladies and gentlemen, for the most dangerous and spectacular act you have ever seen. No, MacKenzie, it's not spectacular, it's not dangerous. We'll come back to this later, Mavis. What happened to your last mermaid? Mermaids don't just vanish. ...
The trouble with a dubious bunch like MacKenzie's Cavalcade is sorting out the petty criminals from the killers. Those two? Well, they're definitely the former. They obviously colluded to steal that money, and it's why Sid tried to stop me with his sword-throwing trick. I'll reserve judgement on the latter. Miss, look....
You had no choice. The show had to go on. The razzle-dazzle went on, didn't it? But I failed her just as I failed poor Pearl. Inspector, just in time. Mr MacKenzie has something he'd like to tell you. I'd like to confess... .. to the manslaughter of my wife... .. Millie MacKenzie... .. ten years ago. Miss Williams, you...
But what about your second husband? Benedict died six months ago in Paris. ~ That's why I came home. ~ I'm sorry. I knew it was risky, but I missed everyone so much. Especially my sister. We were so close, as twins are. Could we bother you for a glass of water? Of course. Quick, Miss! Excuse me for saying so, but... st...
Is Millie still alive? ~ Sorry, sir... How could you trick me like this? ! ~ Millie was my wife! ~ No! MacKenzie! You tell me where she is! I need to see her! She broke my heart! Like Pearl! Let go of me! I need to find her! Well, if you ask me, it has all to do with bringing back the Miraculous Mermaid because each ...
So might a methodical investigation. I'll leave the methodical part to Jack, while I conduct a small experiment in Aunt Prudence's swimming pool. I can't believe MacKenzie's still stuck on this woman after she ran away with another bloke. He even wrote her a soppy love letter. ~ Are you going to deliver it? ~ Of course...
You didn't fail, you didn't kill the Miraculous Mermaid ten years ago. What are you so afraid of? Oh, Prudence! Can't stop! I'm on my way to MacKenzie's magic show. I want to know what my niece is up to! She'll be at the theatre too. I've just had a call - we found a new mermaid. Mermaid? ! I haven't met her yet, but ...
Miss Williams has taken it. Just what we need - two of them. It's Joe and Jerry! Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I'm here tonight to talk to you... I'm sorry, what are you doing here? Oh, I've come to see the magic show. Miss Fisher... .. please, can you please double-check that you'll be able to reach this once yo...
~ Hugh! Oh! Phew! Dottie, what are you doing here? Look at this. Millie Mailer lied about living here. ~ Inspector. ~ Miss Williams. Paregoric. My cousin uses that for his asthma, sir. In this most daring of feats, my Miraculous Mermaid must channel the lungs of a creature from the deep - the wondrous powers of the gre...
And the more successful she became, the more eclipsed you felt, until you could bear it no longer. So, you murdered Millie by trapping her in the water tank. And you convinced MacKenzie it was just some accident. ~ How could I not have seen it all? ~ Because you're a lovesick fool. And it all played out just as you'd h...
I told you it was a wonderful show. Of course, it'll be difficult to replace you, but you've at least made my money back. My money. What I'd like to know is how you managed to squander yours. Is that why you sold the estate in Somerset? Mother wrote to Prudence. She thinks you're in London looking to buy a townhouse. Y...
~ What about a love triangle? ~ I can't imagine that. Well, it's not that difficult. One woman, two men - it has been known to lead to conflict. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Mrs Brown's Boys. # She's Mrs Brown # That's Mrs Brown # Oh, Mrs Brown. # GROANING GROANING CONTINUES Are you nearly done in there, Buster? N...
50 quid. I'll fix you up in Foley's. Done! And it comes with the Buster Brady guarantee. What's that? If anything falls off, you can keep it. HE LAUGHS Here's the manual. A manual? What do I need a feckin' manual for? Securi-Tree 5. What's this for? If you come inside, I'll show you. As well as being a very... attra...
That's just a safety message courtesy of the British Broad Corporing Castration. Do I have to say, it's been a very quiet Christmas so far. It's simple, Dino. Treatment first, THEN introduce the product. There's more than one way to style, you know, and I use the Dino Doyle method. Ha! You can't just make a mess of so...
Why don't you just stay here with your Mammy and she can make you breakfast? At least me mammy never made me beg for a breakfast! DOOR SLAMS Where was I? Oh, yes it's been a very...peaceful Christmas so far. What's all the noise? Dino made a mess of somebody's hair and he won't admit it. So Rory said that that makes it...
Oh! Well, yes, I think I do. Why, what's up? My supervisor, it's just little things like calling me "honey" and "babe" and commenting on how sexy my figure looks. Cathy, that's not right. Your figure's not sexy. You have to tell him that these things make you uncomfortable and if he doesn't stop, you'll have to report...
Nobody noticed a thing, love. Cathy, try and concentrate, love. So hard to get a good daughter nowadays. Oh, Bubbles McCarthy was Mark's girlfriend for three years. Cathy, for God's sake, will you put your fecking' stuff away! Somebody'll have a nasty accident. You know, we all thought that Bubbles and Mark would be ma...
Me bucket list! Your WHAT? ! Me bucket list. I read it in a magazine. You should make a list of all the things you'd love to do and try and get them all done before you die. Mine would be easy. Win the Lottery, go fuckin' bananas. End of list. Get a tattoo? Yes, you should have all your children's names tattooed on yo...
STOP! I thought you liked Bubbles? Well... You loved her when she was going out with Mark.Yes, I know. But when she dumped him, it broke his heart. It took him months to get over it. Ah, Agnes, that was then, this is now. Yes, but now she's back. She's available... and she's coming up here to visit. CUT! "Treadmill for...
Right, Grandad. Let's be having a look at you. LAUGHS I'm sorry, excuse me! Furniture adverts, Mammy? What are you looking for? I'm not looking for anything. I've already bought it. Shelves for me new walk-in wardrobe. What walk-in wardrobe? In me spare room. You don't have a spare room! Not yet, but chest pains, Dermo...
What's the pub called? LAUGHS Oh! The Lederhosen Vorkommen Der... The Lederhosen Vorkommen Der Deutschland Jawohl Ha-ha! APPLAUSE As well as dressing for the part, there's a little dance we have to do and Buster won't practise. The owner's coming to see us in action next Tuesday. I just know Buster won't be ready. Well...
! Yes, I've given him something to shift it. PHHRRTTTT! There you go. I'm off. Now, wait a minute. Are you telling me I've paid �150 for shelves so he can have a fart? LAUGHS Yes, very good. Do you know any Christmas songs? No, sorry, no. You should learn some, son. I should do, yeah. Thanks, Winnie. There you go, Pe...
Er... Number one, write a bucket list. I should put that down, Agnes. "Dear Bucket List, number one, strangle Buster Brady." Here, Buster, why aren't you practising your dance for Dermot? I am practising, Mrs Brown, I'll be ready. You'd better be or I'm telling you, son, you'll have no job. Speaking of jobs, Cathy's w...
I thought it was Bubbles McGrath? Ah, it used to be, it's McCarthy now. I'm divorced. Well, he's not! OK, I have it. Let's do this. Agnes, if vampires can't see their reflection in the mirror, how come their hair is always perfect? Winnie, shut up! Ahem! What's this? What's going on? Mammy, the whole family have chi...
Canada! Yay! Yippee-ki-buckin'-aye! Why do they want to get rid of me? They don't, Agnes. It's just a present. Yes, a present that says "Happy Christmas, Mammy. Now feck off!" How's things coming with your bucket list? Here. CHUCKLES "Own a bit of land"? Yeah.You wish! I always wanted to have a bit of land, you know, ...
Winnie, that's the past, now back to the future. Why are they trying to get rid of me? I want to be at home for Christmas! Agnes, it's just a present. Speaking of presents. Here, Happy Christmas. Ah, you're very good, Agnes. It's only a little something. I may as well give it to you now, because I won't be here for Chr...
No, we don't do collections, do we, Michael? Never. Well, well, son... Listen, you're going to have to ring the shop and they'll send someone out. It won't be till after Christmas cos we'll be spending Christmas with our families. Christmas with their families. With their families! SHE SOBS LAUGHTER She said her moth...
Isn't he? His daddy is so cute and so married! You remember what that is, Bubbles? I know what married is. Granny told me. Married is when one person is always right and the other person is the husband. Exactly! Right, Bono, come on. I was going to ask you to keep an eye on him, Mrs Brown, but it doesn't matter. I se...
What's up? Cathy, why do yous want to send me away for Christmas? What? We don't, Mammy! It's just a chance to spend some time with your sister, that's all. Is it something I've done? Mammy, we just wanted you to have a special Christmas. Cathy, I've had every Christmas at home with the family and they've all been spe...
No, you haven't! Would you like a drink, Bubbles, before you go? No, thanks. Sharon, when you're ready. A pint of cider and a glass of Chardonnay! OK. Sharon, is your mother not coming down tonight? Oh, yeah, she's getting all dolled up. She couldn't wait to try the curling tongs you gave her for Christmas. I didn't g...
Dermot's just here, he got the contract! ALL: Hurrah! What is SHE doing here? Rory asked her. Sorry, it's not fair to you. Hey, girls! Hi's, Cathy! Bubbles.Oh, dear, I thought everybody was dressing up. Bitch! Don't mind her. It's always casual dress. LAUGHTER Congratulations, boys, well done! Well done! You got the...
Oh, I have fuckin' music! Are you ready? OOMPAH MUSIC STARTS AUDIENCE CHEER AND APPLAUD Touche! Get yourselves a feckin' drink. Yous knew I was going to do that, didn't ya? Oh, Mrs Brown... I have that thing for ye. Whoa, son! Back off! And I put it up. Good man, well done! Thank you. Now, it's a reject, so I hope i...
You haven't changed a bit! Yes, I have.No, you're still as handsome as ever. Bubbles, I don't know what you were expecting, but if it's hooking up with me... That's it, hold this. I'm going to smack her! Hold on there, Bubblicious! Now, there's only two women in this room that get to stroke his face like that, and you ...
I just did, Mammy, only not as loud as you did. Fine! Cathy, what's wrong with YOU? Looking for an angle to come at somebody who's harassing you. Why don't you stand up for yourself? I did, Mammy! I smacked her in the mouth! Fine. OK! Rory... Rory, when are you going to learn that Botox doesn't work on a double chin? I...
It's hot chocolate! Now, here... put them on. Follow me. FOLLOW ME! Ah, Agnes! Ah, this is amazing! What was the next thing on your list? Own a bit of land. Ah, Jaysus, Agnes, you haven't gone and bought me a farm, have you? No. Better! Here, look at that. "Winnie McGoogan, you are now the owner of KT1069." What's tha...
That Sharon would win Miss World. Would you settle for Crufts? TREE: You can't touch this! You know, Winnie, there's nothing sadder than waking up on Christmas morning and not being a child. I know. But this - THIS makes me feel like a child again! It's a pity it isn't snowing. Hold on! Ah, Agnes this is... this is ...
I'm grand, I'm grand! I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine! Really, I'm OK! TREE: You can't touch this! No...still in one piece! Ha-ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha! Goodnight! # You can't touch this # Can't touch this # Break it down! # Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! # Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! # Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! # Oh, ...
Merry Christmas! Goodnight! LAUGHS Just a heads-up-- starting tomorrow, my bar will be closed for a week. Did someone finally get sick from eating the food? Or is it smelling the food? I think the smell is worse than the taste. My bar is clean, okay? This is just some routine maintenance. The place is crawling with bu...
[ Chuckles ] _ Why does Grayson have a picture of P! nk on his bathroom mirror? - 'Cause he's trying to get her abs. - Mm. Were you snooping up there? - That's preposterous. - You were. You only talk like the queen when you're hiding something. - Beg pardon, milady? - Mm. Hey, guys. Wow. Jelly, you look ridiculous. Is ...
- [ Door closes ] - Want some? - What I wanna know is why Grayson has been leaving at 9:00 AM every day this week with no mention of where he's going, carrying a weird duffel bag, and then returning three hours later looking strangely happy. How have I not noticed that? Who can know, really? - [ Door opens and closes ]...
It's a bank card. You can use this anywhere. For $300! Wow! - Yeah, Laurie's gonna be stoked. - W- - Trav. Your old co-workers just gave you a $300 gift that Laurie doesn't know about, has no way of ever hearing about, and you're house gonna hand it over to her for diapers and butt wipes? Seems to me that you're the b...
Stop it. Both. [ Gasps ] I... Trav, in every happy relationship, there is one common element-- a woman who gets what she wants when she wants it all the time without exception. Well, that doesn't sound happy to me. Well, that's because you're young and stupid, but I'm here to help. In every relationship disagreement, t...
I've wanted this for months, but Laurie hates video games. Come on! Let's go to your house and play. My house? Are you crazy? Ellie can't see me playing this. We can't play at my house. So I just indirectly lied to Laurie and blew my gift card on a treat I can't enjoy? Well, see ya. - Hey, babe. [ Chuckles ] - Hi. ...
Love you. Uh, hey, babe? You know, when you've been coming home from your daily errands, you seem really happy. Of course I'm happy. I'm married to you. Aw. [ Giggles ] Dang it! He threw me off the trail. - [ Door closes ] - World's worst detective. Fortunately, you have me. Ellie, what are you doing? - W-- - No, no...
- or... a gun. - [ Material rustling ] This is boring. At least none of these are weird sex things. - Uh, two of them can be. - Which one? No, I don't wanna know. The fedora, right? If you really wanna know what he's doing... 1100 Ocean Street. 6:00 PM. Bingo. Case closed. Actually, it-- it's not. It's very open. That...
All right, well, if I can't play this anywhere, I might as well return it. No, you can't give up now. This is your... secret treat. [ Mouth full ] We gotta find a place to play. - What about Tom's house? - No. The last time I walked in his garage, he was wearing a kimono, eating sushi off the body of a female mannequin...
♪ your generosity just made my day ♪ ♪ so drink your wi-- ♪ - [ Door closes ] - [ High-pitched voice ] What up, y'all? Okay, that's officially child abuse. I mean, skankify yourself if you must, but please, don't skankify a baby. Jules, tell her how this looks. They're so adorable. I just wanna gobble them both up righ...
- Oh. Um, I'm here to, um... Well... I actually don't know why I'm here. You're looking to have some fun, maybe get out of your comfort zone? Um... o-okay. Sure. First time? Mm. The first time is the best. [ Under breath ] Oh, God. - [ Beep ] - [ Laser shooting sounds ] [ Muffled voice ] Stick with me, kid. I'll tak...
Your stories. But what I hate most of all are parents who dress their children exactly like them. It's like nails on a chalkboard, but then the chalkboard is beating me over the head. Please, please stop it. [ Clenches teeth ] I'm asking you nicely! I had no idea that you felt this way. Of course I could stop it... if ...
- [ Cheers and applause ] - Oh! There you are! - Hey! - 2, 3, 4! ♪ we're the Riga-Tonys ♪ ♪ and it's no baloney ♪ ♪ we like jokes and pratfalls ♪ ♪ 'cause we're a bunch of meatballs ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] Seriously? Ugh. Hey, how was the, uh, sex-fight/fight-sex club? It was even weirder than I thought. Was it any...
- spying on me. - I have not been trailing you. I've been going through your private things when you're not here. That may be worse. What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? I tell you everything-- My ATM code, why I'm scared of mannequins. I even tell you about my dream that I'm marrying Travis. I know. I keep ...
You'd think as a surgeon I'd be better at this. Ellie: - What is happening? Laurie: - Hey. You like it? Is this one of those "What Would You Do?" news shows? 'Cause if so, the answer's mass murder. I tweeted out to all my Iarmy peeps to declare today parent-kid dress-alike day in Gulfhaven. #parent-kid-samesies-day, ...
- [ Cell phone ringing ] - Is that your phone? Nah. It seems like it's coming from over there. - [ Ring ] - From... inside the vent? [ Laughs ] Laurie - that's... - [ Ring ] That's crazy. I mean... [ Cell phone vibrating ] You know what? I guess I could eat again. Pizza? [ Ring ] - You're in my way. - And you're i...
And it is turning me on big-time. - Ditto that. - Oh! [ Both moaning ] Okay, wait. Is this undermining the fact that I'm mad at you? - Tremendously. - Ugh. [ Sighs deeply ] Babe, I am so sorry for not being honest with you. Well, I'm sorry for not trusting you. [ Sighs ] Look, Jules, I'm in a comedy troupe. There it i...
Andy convinced me women always win, and the only way to stay happy is... [ Whispers ] ...secret treats. Why do you whisper it? I still don't know. Are you completely furious with me? No, I'm not furious. I mean, I'm a little annoyed, but not because you bought a PlayStation-- because you felt like you had to hide it fr...
Laurie found out? Did she yell until it set off a car alarm? Give you a look so cold you started having war flashbacks, despite never having been near a war? Is that stuff Ellie's done? I don't wanna talk about it! So what did Laurie do? Asked to play. It was great. Are you okay? Of course. I have my... [ Mouth full ]...
I'm kinda over it. I'm into exotic pets now. - [ Screeches ] - It's a baby fox. - Aw! Can I pet it? - No, I wouldn't. It's a wild animal. All right. That's okay. I gotta go anyway. - Where to? - Ah, just some boring errands. - [ Screeches ] - Gotta pick up the dry cleaning, get some plant food, um... tax document,...