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favor. all the motherfuckers on cnn. and what else were we watching? cnbc?
A
4.4
1.8
5.8
1249
Female
... and because i did take the time to research what he's into and what he's not. do i agree with everything that gary johnson wanted? no, not everything. there were a couple things that i thought were bullshit and i didn't care for but-
N
5.222222
2.777778
5
130
Female
... most things, he lined up with my views. i was like, "hey, he represents what i like. i'm going to vote for him."
H
5.090909
5.545455
5.090909
130
Female
did i go to the polls thinking that he was going to win? no. i knew it was a long shot, but i was hope-
X
5
4.2
4.8
1249
Female
and they don't line up with the democratic or republican parties.
N
4.6
3.2
4.8
1249
Female
gotten a real view of what he thought and even jill stein, what they thought, if they would have let them into the debate.
N
2.8
3.4
3.4
131
Female
imagine, imagine. look at how many people-
X
4.833333
3.833333
4.75
130
Female
... voted for a third party and they didn't even let those motherfuckers debate. and-
A
5
2.2
4.2
130
Female
where he is on the fucking bear and he was riding a horse or whatever, but then they put him on a bear and a shark and all kind, i'm going to put so many memes up here.
H
5.4
5
5.4
1249
Female
do you hear my cat?yeah.he says, "hello" and he just fucked the whole commercial up.
H
4.6
4.8
4.8
1249
Female
i don't know why he does it, but he does. he'll do it in the middle of the night. he'll get right up at the crack of the door. i feel like he puts his face at the crack of the door and goes, "ma-ma."
X
5
5
4.6
1249
Female
... you just randomly sent me a picture of that. and i was like, "what the fuck is this?"can you tell what it was?i mean, i knew it was a cat, but it looked kind of evil.
U
6
3.4
5
130
Female
it was all black.fucking out of here.my cat is all black with white.
H
6.2
4.2
5.2
130
Female
what was that from? maybe it was just its own thing. i mean, it was an older cartoon, right?
H
4.916667
4.916667
4.75
130
Female
you know what? you told me to remind you to tell a story and i forgot to remind you to tell the story.
O
3.8
5
4
1249
Female
yeah, well. good to know.i just-
H
5.909091
6.181818
5.272727
130
Female
well, i was watching the stand up and she was talking about all the shit that women do and they always get together and talk about the weather like, "it is so hot outside." or whatever. and i was like, "yeah, we do always-
N
5.666667
3.333333
5
131
Female
[crosstalk 00:02:00] it was early.it was completely dark at six o'clock tonight. and i swear, i saw a thing online today that said football season is halfway over after this week. and i was like, "it-
U
5.153846
3.923077
4.615385
131
Female
did it just start?... just started." and it's 16 weeks, football's been on for eight.
X
5.5
4.166667
4.333333
131
Female
is there-
O
3.8
3.4
4
1249
Female
felt like it was cheesy. i was like, "is that really what you want to do?" is like, "not even cook on the holidays, either."
X
5
3.4
4.2
131
Female
yeah it is really, but if you don't have anyone that's coming to visit to share it with you, then...
X
3.2
3.2
4.4
1249
Female
political. i just posted like, "voted today." and somebody was like, "trump?" i feel like there were trying to-
X
5
3.090909
4.454545
131
Female
... put a dead mink on her head. with the coloration, it was a fur-
U
5.4
3.4
4.4
131
Female
guy with a shirt that said cocaine on it, and he was talking so loud... who-
X
5.4
4.6
5.2
1249
Female
... and be like, "well, look at this. look at me, i'm hurting. i'm special. look at me taking care of this hurt special person because i'm a good person. selfie is [inaudible 00:02:45]."
H
6
4.4
5.8
130
Female
so many unnecessary words for the slogan. that's not even the fucking slogan. it's "make america great again."yeah.and they said "we'll turn america to greatness again."yeah.
H
5.6
5.2
5.2
1249
Female
trump. and i was like, you guys shouldn't talk about this at home.
N
5
4.6
5
1249
Female
your fucking marital problems, how you're trying to control her life into the polling station.
A
6.333333
2.888889
5.888889
131
Female
and just kind of looking straight forward. she's wiggling and digging in her nose and you know that he sees everything that she's doing.
D
5.1
3.1
4.6
130
Female
but the first thing that i noticed is she's knuckle deep, in her nose. and then she takes it out and wipes it on her daddy's lips. and i was like,-
D
6
3
4.8
130
Female
get those amoebas. this is how your babies die. do not do it. if your baby is intensely digging in her nose, knuckle deep and wiping it on your lips. slap it...
D
5.2
3
5.2
130
Female
fruit snacks and shit. baby. pennies.gross.cheerios.gross. you're ruining my life.babies put things in their pocket all...
H
4.8
5
4.2
130
Female
it was a while ago. i thought i told you about it.no.it was really fucked up. i was like, "oh."
X
5.4
4.4
5.4
130
Female
he was like, "look at your baby's eyes. look at the petite [tia 00:03:19]. and i'm like,-
U
6.6
4.2
6
131
Female
"i'm really sorry. he just won't stop." and they work at publix. they have to kiss your ass so like, "oh no, it's fine."
D
5.4
3
4.8
131
Female
like every kid being diagnosed with fucking autism. i think a lot of-
D
4.2
2.8
4.4
130
Female
... cheerios. so i'm out there and i'm having a good time and then i hear them ring the bell.
H
5
4.2
4.2
130
Female
and i'm like, "i lost this. i lost this inner tube. why? what's going on?" and i ran back up around-
U
5.2
3.4
5
130
Female
i ran up to her and i'm like, "hey, who was that? was that one of mike's friends?" and she was like, "what are you talking-
H
5.333333
4.833333
4.666667
130
Female
dmt and near-death experiences and stuff. and i'm like,-
C
4.4
2.8
4
130
Female
i played it for about an hour and then i put it down and i never went back.
C
3.4
3.6
3
130
Female
oh my god. you sure the fuck did.yeah, man.i don't want to let you get arrested and say where or how any of this happened.
H
3.6
3.8
4
130
Female
i really wanted to.
N
3.2
4
3.2
1249
Female
i see, because it is ego death. i mean, remember we had the conversation and we were like,-
N
3.2
3.6
3.4
1249
Female
that explains and so crazy to say.
H
5.6
6
4.5
131
Female
yeah. but it was just a sea of mouths and vaginas and dicks and asses. but it was this constant-
X
4.8
3
5
130
Female
my brain took a moment to remember it, almost and in detail and-
N
2.636364
3.636364
3.727273
130
Female
it was so strange. but they were all,-
H
5.8
5.8
4.8
131
Female
"yeah. it was great." and i'm like, "why am i talking to these things?" but i'm talking to them. i'm like, "yeah, it was a really intense."
H
5.8
6.1
5.8
130
Female
i can't even describe it. i can look out and i see all of these tiny dots and you know that each one of those dots...
N
3.8
4
3.8
130
Female
our own version of whatever i am to you and...
S
3.3125
3.75
3.8125
130
Female
yeah. there's no real color. the...
X
3.6
3
3.6
1249
Female
i'm like, "oh god," and i freak out. and it was...
H
6.230769
5.615385
5.923077
130
Female
like i was getting mad at this thing with everyone. it was a very emotional situation.
H
5.2
4.8
4.4
130
Female
... like he was my guardian or something, not a guardian angel, but just something that was just there to make sure that i didn't fuck anything up or something. that was what it felt like. it didn't feel like something that...
A
5.2
3
5.2
130
Female
... and i only broke through about three or four.
N
3.833333
4
3.666667
130
Female
when something's messing with you and it feels like it's just doing it because it thinks it's funny...
X
4.2
3
4.4
130
Female
it's not even...
H
5.8
6
5.2
131
Female
it's very humbling. if you can take all the shitty collective experiences that you've had and say, "you know what, i had to..."
N
4.2
4.6
4.4
130
Female
well, you see, what happened was i wanted to go to the spirit realm.right.and the only way to get there is with a blowtorch apparently.
N
3.214286
3.357143
3.285714
130
Female
need to enjoy. you need to enjoy the time you have here.listen...
H
4.8
5.2
4.4
130
Female
how was hillary? but this time we're going to play the for real game. we're going to play it slightly different because...
H
5
6
4.6
1249
Female
and there's people waving trump banners.
X
3.8
4.4
4.6
1249
Female
and they didn't stop the whole time. they must have really good arm strength because i was thinking about that.
U
5.4
4
4.4
131
Female
no, but i mean they...fucking hurt.yeah, they were big enough that you could put them on a good size flagpole.they had...
X
5.4
4.4
4.8
Unknown
Unknown
i didn't know you almost quit. you were bad.
X
4.8
5.6
4.4
1249
Female
i'm looking around like, "that's kind of weird. there's nobody in."
H
5.6
5
5.3
131
Female
and i had it in my hand and i said, "guess what? somebody ruined my lunch."
A
5.714286
3.785714
5.714286
131
Female
food sitting out for hours. i'd be like, hey, did you mean to leave your food out?yeah.nobody said a word. and so i went to every fucking door in my office and i was like, somebody messed up my...
A
5.4
3.8
5
Unknown
Unknown
and then i was wondering why i was sitting there. so that made me even more mad. so i go in the kitchen and i slammed it in the door.
U
6
4.4
5.2
131
Female
buy some more foods and somebody doesn't think i need to eat lunch around here.
A
6.538462
2.153846
5.846154
131
Female
so i was so mad and there's nothing good to eat around my work.
H
5.5
5
5.083333
131
Female
it totally takes all my credibility away now that i'm mad.i'm just trying to lighten the mood.
H
6.166667
5.166667
5
131
Female
five minutes into being in there, i was like, wait a minute.i know.all right, so...well now i feel like i can't still be mad about what happened.
H
5
4.8
4.4
Unknown
Unknown
didn't even make sense. they'd be like, oh, did you finish such and such? i'm like, i don't know. you should've asked me before i got mad about...
H
5.6
5
5
Unknown
Unknown
i guess i don't see anything like everyone else does here. and i fucking left. and i...
H
5
5.2
4.6
1249
Female
and it was multiple people that would do this. they would just come in there and take a quick swig of a drink and leave. and it was always old new york men, like old fat...
X
5.8
3.6
5.2
130
Female
... on it. and i had just bitched about that, that morning. and then i put my lunch in there and someone fucked up my lunch. so i was ready to hit the fucking roof. i...
A
6.272727
2.272727
6.090909
131
Female
was so... somebody fucked up my breakfast and my lunch.
X
5.6
2.8
4.8
Unknown
Unknown
... probably went out to lunch right in front of my office manager. i was like, "i had..."
H
5.4
4.8
5.4
131
Female
waiting tables at chili's. bonus for added challenge, try being gay or black.
H
5.4
5
4.8
Unknown
Unknown
spins it and closes it. the card czar then holds the gun to his or her head and pulls the trigger. if the card czar survives, he or she defiantly places the gun in the center of the table.
H
4.6
5.6
4.4
Unknown
Unknown
all players begin masturbating immediately.
H
5.833333
4.5
5
130
Female
and the clean room players, shift her cloudy gaze from pile to pile. is it a trick...
X
4.4
5
3.8
130
Female
this is the worst game that's ever been created.okay. what did the us air drop to the children of afghanistan?
H
6
3.6
3.8
130
Female
oh my god, well, if you'll excuse me, gentlemen...
H
5.4
4.8
4.2
130
Female
i don't know if i have 10 cards. i feel like i may have forgotten to get one. god dammit, why did i have to pick that card?
X
5.2
3.6
3.2
130
Female
this year's mass shooting. okay, that was dark.
X
4.6
3.4
4.6
Unknown
Unknown
million people did.yep.what? i don't know what that means either.
N
3.2
3.2
3.2
1249
Female
wait, i think that would be on espn deportes.oh, it might.
H
5.2
5.8
5.2
1249
Female
i don't know why any of these are options, they're all equally bad.
X
4.6
3.4
3.8
130
Female
all right.this is a pick two. that means you get to pick one more card according to that one rule. so for the pick two-
H
4.6
4.8
4.8
1249
Female
introducing the amazing superhero sidekick duo, it's blank and blank.
H
5.545455
5.636364
5.545455
130
Female
close the door. shut it.close it. close it.don't let them in.
H
5.166667
5.166667
4.333333
130
Female
we don't want any. all right, here's the church. here's the steeple. open the doors and there is eight ounces of sweetened mexican black tar heroin.
H
4
4.8
5.2
1249
Female
and where's this church located? i need to get there.
H
5
5.6
4.8
131
Female
i didn't pick one.
N
2.6
4.4
3
1249
Female
five of these. that would be fucking funny. okay.well you got to pick one.all right. i'm just going to do one.
H
6
5.2
5.8
130
Female
i get backstage passes and all.okay.
H
5.75
6.083333
5.166667
131
Female