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Dataset card Data Studio Files
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No, I don't suppose it has. He was broken up like nobody's business in that hospital when he found out Louisa was dead.
And he's never tried to get in touch with his son?
Henry told Cyrus he'd kill him if he ever showed his face around our house again. When Henry makes a threat like that, people tend to take him seriously.
They don't come cheap, son. These little honeys are works of art. Rolled by hand in a tropical climate, most likely by an eighteen year old girl in a thin cotton dress with no underwear on. Little beads of sweat forming in her naked cleavage. The smooth, delicate fingers nimbly turning out one masterpiece after another...
And how much are these?
Seventyeight dollars. The girl who rolled these was probably wearing panties.
And these?
Fiftysix. That girl had on a corset.
And these?
Fortyfour. They're on special this week from the Canary Islands. A real bargain.
I think I'll take them.
A good choice. You wouldn't want to celebrate the birth of your firstborn with a box of stinkers, would you? Remember to keep them in the refrigerator until you hand them out.
The refrigerator?
It'll keep them fresh. If they get too dry, they'll break. And you don't want that to happen, do you? Tobacco is a plant, and it needs the same loving care you'd give an orchid.
Thanks for the tip.
Any time. And congratulations to you and your wife. Just remember, though, in the immortal words of Rudyard Kipling: "A woman is just a woman, but a cigar is a smoke.
What does that mean?
Damned if I know. But it has a nice ring to it, don't it?
How'd you do out there, Jimmy?
Good, Auggie. Real good. All finished.
It'll never be finished.
Huh?
That's how it is with sidewalks. People come, people go, and they all drop shit on the ground. As soon as you clean up one spot and move on to the next, the first spot is dirty again.
I just do what you tell me, Auggie. You tell me to sweep, so I sweep.
Sure, Auggie, I got it. The store's closed. And when do I tell them it's open?
When I tell you it's open. It's open when I tell you it's open!
Okay, Auggie, I got it. You don't have to yell.
... If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, it doesn't. Do you understand what I'm saying? You never know what's going to happen next, and the moment you think you know, that's the moment you don't know a goddamn thing. That's what we call a paradox. Are you following me?
Sure, Auggie. I follow. When you don't know nothing, it's like paradise. I know what that is. It's after you're dead and you go up to heaven and sit with the angels.
Jesus, man, you're one fucking mess.
Does it hurt?
Of course it hurts. What does it look like?
I thought maybe he was pretending.
Seventeen.
Seventeen? I remember when I was seventeen. Christ, I was one little whackedout sonofabitch when I was seventeen. Is that what you are, son? One little whackedout crazy fella?
Definitely. I'd say you've hit the nail on the head.
Good. Keep it up, and maybe one day you'll grow up and become a great man like me.
A job? I definitely wouldn't turn down a job.
Come around to the cigar store tomorrow morning at ten o'clock and we'll talk about it, okay? We'll see what we can work out.
Ten o'clock tomorrow morning. I'll be there.
I'll be back in about an hour. Watch the register while I'm gone, okay?
Sure thing. See you later.
A little. Not much.
This way, gentlemen. Let's retire to my office, shall we?
It's for you.
For me? And what am I supposed to do with a paper bag?
Open it.
What is this, some kind of joke?
No, it's five thousand dollars.
Shit. I don't want your money, you little twerp. It's probably stolen anyway.
What do you care where it comes from? It's yours.
And why the hell would you give me money?
So I can get my job back.
Your job? You've got five thousand bucks. What do you want a pieceofshit job like that for?
To look at the dirty magazines. I can see all the naked women I want, and it doesn't cost me a cent.
You're a dumb, whackedout little fuck, do you know that?
Come on, come on, you yellow belly. The whole thing. First name and last name.
What difference does it make?
Okay. I think everything's set. You've got the number for Cape Cod, right? Just in case something goes wrong.
No problem, Vinnie. Everything's under control. I could run this store in my sleep.
How long you been working for me, Auggie?
I don't know. Thirteen, fourteen years. Something like that.
It's pretty crazy, don't you think? I mean, a smart guy like you. What do you want to hang on to a deadend job like this for?
I don't know. Maybe because I love you so much, boss.
Shit. You should have been married to someone by now. You know, settled down somewhere with a kid or two, a nice steady job.
I almost got married once.
Yeah, I know. To that girl who moved to Pittsburgh.
Ruby McNutt. My one true love.
Sounds like another one of your stories to me.
She upped and married some other cat after I joined the navy. By the time I got my discharge, though, she was divorced. Her husband poked out her eye in a domestic quarrel.
Lovely.
She made a play for me after I got back, but her glass eye kept interfering with my concentration. Every time we got into a clinch, I'd start thinking about that hole in her head, that empty socket with the glass eye in it. An eye that couldn't see, an eye that couldn't shed any tears. The minute I started thinking about it, Mr. Johnson would get all soft and small. And I can't see getting married if Mr. Johnson isn't going to be in tiptop shape.
You don't take anything seriously, do you?
I try not to, anyway. It's better for your health. I mean, look at you, Vincent. You're the guy with the wife and three kids and the ranch house on Long Island. You're the guy with the white shoes and the white Caddy and the white shag carpet. But you've had two heart attacks, and I'm still waiting for my first.
I should stop smoking these damn things is what I should do. The fuckers are going to kill me one day.
Enjoy it while you can, Vin. Pretty soon, they're going to legislate us out of business anyway.
They catch you smoking tobacco, they'll stand you up against a wall and shoot you.
Tobacco today, sex tomorrow. In three or four years, it'll probably be against the law to smile at strangers.
Speaking of which, are you still going ahead with that deal on the Montecristos?
It's all set. My guy in Miami said he'd have them within the next few weeks. Are you sure you don't want to go in with me? Five thousand dollars outlay, a guaranteed tenthousanddollar return. A consortium of Court Street lawyers and judges. They're just drooling to get their lips around some genuine Cuban cigars.
No thanks. I don't care what you do, but just make sure you don't get caught, okay? The last I heard, it was still illegal to sell Cuban cigars in this country.
It's the law that's buying. That's what's so beautiful about it. I mean, when was the last time you heard of a judge sending himself to jail?
Suit yourself. But don't keep the boxes around here long.
They come in, they go out. I've got it planned to the last detail.
I've got to get moving. Terry will bust my chops if I'm late. See you in September, Auggie.
Okay, my man. Love to the wife and kids, et cetera, et cetera. Drop me a postcard if you can remember the address.
Christ, Ruby, it's been so long. I figured you were dead.
Eighteen and a half years.
Is that all? I thought it was about three hundred.
You're looking good, Auggie.
No I'm not. I look like shit. And so do you, Ruby. You look just awful. What's with the patch, anyway? What'd you do with that old blue marble hock it for a bottle of gin?
I don't want to talk about it. If you really want to know. I lost it. And I'm not sorry I did. That eye was cursed, Auggie, and it never gave me nothing but grief.
And you think it looks better to go around dressed up like Captain Hook?
You always were a sonofabitch, weren't you? A little weasel with a quick, dirty mouth.
At least I've stayed true to myself. Which is more than I can say about some people.
I've got something to talk to you about, and the least you can do is listen. You owe me that much. I drove all the way from Pittsburgh to see you, and I'm not going until you've heard me out.
Talk away, lady of my dreams. I'm all ears.
This is private, Auggie. Just between you and I.
You heard her, pipsqueak. The lady and I have private business to discuss. Go outside and stand in front of the door. If anyone tries to come in, tell 'em we're closed. You got that?
All right, sugar, what's on your mind?