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Nine! Come hither to me, Master Froth. Master
Froth, I would not have you acquainted with
tapsters: they will draw you, Master Froth, and you
will hang them. Get you gone, and let me hear no
more of you.
FROTH:
I thank your worship. For mine own part, I never
come into any room in a tap-house, but I am drawn
in.
ESCALUS:
Well, no more of it, Master Froth: farewell.
Come you hither to me, Master tapster. What's your
name, Master tapster?
POMPEY:
Pompey.
ESCALUS:
What else?
POMPEY:
Bum, sir.
ESCALUS:
Troth, and your bum is the greatest thing about you;
so that in the beastliest sense you are Pompey the
Great. Pompey, you are partly a bawd, Pompey,
howsoever you colour it in being a tapster, are you
not? come, tell me true: it shall be the better for you.
POMPEY:
Truly, sir, I am a poor fellow that would live.
ESCALUS:
How would you live, Pompey? by being a bawd? What
do you think of the trade, Pompey? is it a lawful trade?
POMPEY:
If the law would allow it, sir.
ESCALUS:
But the law will not allow it, Pompey; nor it shall
not be allowed in Vienna.
POMPEY:
Does your worship mean to geld and splay all the
youth of the city?
ESCALUS:
No, Pompey.
POMPEY:
Truly, sir, in my poor opinion, they will to't then.
If your worship will take order for the drabs and
the knaves, you need not to fear the bawds.
ESCALUS:
There are pretty orders beginning, I can tell you:
it is but heading and hanging.
POMPEY:
If you head and hang all that offend that way but
for ten year together, you'll be glad to give out a
commission for more heads: if this law hold in
Vienna ten year, I'll rent the fairest house in it
after three-pence a bay: if you live to see this
come to pass, say Pompey told you so.
ESCALUS:
Thank you, good Pompey; and, in requital of your
prophecy, hark you: I advise you, let me not find
you before me again upon any complaint whatsoever;
no, not for dwelling where you do: if I do, Pompey,
I shall beat you to your tent, and prove a shrewd
Caesar to you; in plain dealing, Pompey, I shall
have you whipt: so, for this time, Pompey, fare you well.
POMPEY:
I thank your worship for your good counsel:
but I shall follow it as the flesh and fortune shall
better determine.
Whip me? No, no; let carman whip his jade:
The valiant heart is not whipt out of his trade.
ESCALUS:
Come hither to me, Master Elbow; come hither, Master
constable. How long have you been in this place of constable?
ELBOW:
Seven year and a half, sir.
ESCALUS:
I thought, by your readiness in the office, you had
continued in it some time. You say, seven years together?
ELBOW:
And a half, sir.