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my eyes widen as i taste myself on his lips and he pushes his tongue inside me with abandon . | [
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`` i 'm going to make you feel so fucking good , '' he promises with a wicked smile , undoing his belt buckle and unzipping his pants in one fluid motion before pushing them and his boxers to the ground . | [
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i gape at his massive cock as it 's unsheathed from his underwear . | [
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its size snaps me back to the reality of what 's about to happen , and i feel overcome with fear and adrenalin ... but i ca n't take my eyes off it . | [
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i want to feel him inside of me so much , but i think there 's one thing i need to tell him first . | [
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he bites his lip and moves against me again . | [
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i can feel his cock , throbbing and ready , against my stomach . | [
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he wraps his arms around me , and eases me back onto the bed and lays on top of me , kissing my neck . | [
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`` nate ... i ... i have to tell you ... '' i murmur , his mouth a complete distraction . | [
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`` mmm , whatever it is , it does n't matter now , '' he replies , biting my earlobe . | [
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`` it might , though . | [
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i just thought i should tell you , or warn you maybe , in case i 'm not very good- '' `` i doubt that- '' `` i 'm a virgin . '' | [
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i feel his body stiffen as the words cross my lips . | [
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he pulls back and looks me in the eye . | [
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`` what ? | [
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no way . '' | [
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i nod . | [
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`` but it 's ok . | [
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i want to do this . '' | [
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`` how ... how are you a virgin ? '' | [
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oh , dear . | [
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this is not the kind of conversation i want to have right now . | [
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`` i do n't know , i just am . | [
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it just has n't happened yet , but i 'm ready now . '' | [
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i assure him . | [
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`` but you 've ... you must have done some things ... '' he begins worriedly . | [
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`` yeah , sure , you know , kissing ... '' `` and ? | [
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wait , was that the first time anyone 's ever gone down on you ? '' | [
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i can only shrug . | [
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`` i did n't think it would be that big of a deal . | [
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i just was telling you , in case i 'm not that good , or if i bleed or something . '' | [
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he rolls off of me and sits up . | [
101,
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] | [
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shit . | [
101,
4485,
1012,
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] | [
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` brynn , it is a big deal , it 's a very big deal to me . '' | [
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`` i do n't understand ... '' i reply , sitting up and pulling the sheet over to cover me , suddenly feeling very self-conscious . | [
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`` it 's just , your first time ... it 's going to mean a lot to you . '' | [
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`` so ? '' | [
101,
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1005,
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i say , confused . | [
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1045,
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5457,
1012,
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] |
he spreads his hands open on his legs but does n't say anything . | [
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i feel a sensation like a rock sinking to the bottom of my stomach . | [
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`` oh ... you 're saying it will mean a lot to me , but it wo n't mean a lot to you . '' | [
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i stare straight forward as he turns to me . | [
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] |
`` brynn , you 're smart , gorgeous , funny , ambitious ... you 're wonderful ... but like i told you before , i do n't lie to women and say that i 'm interested in something more when i 'm not . '' | [
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`` i guess i forgot about your policy , '' i reply flatly , feeling like the biggest idiot in the world . | [
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] |
the biggest naked idiot in the world . | [
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6248,
10041,
1999,
1996,
2088,
1012,
102
] | [
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] |
`` could you ... could you close your eyes ? '' | [
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1036,
1036,
2071,
2017,
1012,
1012,
1012,
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2485,
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`` brynn , i 've seen- '' `` just close them , ok ? '' | [
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] |
i glance at him to make sure he 's complied , and then stand up and begin to gather my clothes from the floor . | [
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1045,
6054,
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2000,
2191,
2469,
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i slip everything back on as quickly as i can , and then look back at him . | [
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his eyes are closed , and he 's sitting nude and perfectly still on the edge of the bed . | [
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2159,
2024,
2701,
1010,
1998,
2002,
1005,
1055,
3564,
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1,
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1,
1,
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1,
1,
1
] |
he looks as perfect as i 've ever seen him look , which is really saying something . | [
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3504,
2004,
3819,
2004,
1045,
1005,
2310,
2412,
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my heart breaks a little , as i move to the door and shut it behind me . | [
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2210,
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] |
i hurry down the hall and into my own bedroom , which now feels cold and empty . | [
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2091,
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2534,
1998,
2046,
2026,
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i crawl into bed without bothering to take off my clothes and pull the covers over me . | [
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i 'm no different to nate thornhill than any of the other girls he 's been with , and i should have known that . | [
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1045,
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1049,
2053,
2367,
2000,
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] |
stupid , stupid , stupid . | [
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1010,
5236,
1010,
5236,
1012,
102
] | [
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] | [
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] |
i hear a soft knock at the door and pull the covers up a little higher , but do n't answer . | [
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1
] |
if it 's my mom , i do n't want to see her , and if it 's nate , i really do n't want to see him . | [
101,
2065,
2009,
1005,
1055,
2026,
3566,
1010,
1045,
2079,
1050,
1005,
1056,
2215,
2000,
2156,
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1055,
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1010,
1045,
2428,
2079,
1050,
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1056,
2215,
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2156,
2032,
1012,
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1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
there 's another knock , a little louder , and then the door is slowly pushed open . | [
101,
2045,
1005,
1055,
2178,
7324,
1010,
1037,
2210,
10989,
1010,
1998,
2059,
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2341,
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3254,
3724,
2330,
1012,
102
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1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
i can just see nate 's shadow in the moonlight . | [
101,
1045,
2064,
2074,
2156,
8253,
1005,
1055,
5192,
1999,
1996,
11986,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
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] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
he closes the door behind him and moves into the room . | [
101,
2002,
14572,
1996,
2341,
2369,
2032,
1998,
5829,
2046,
1996,
2282,
1012,
102
] | [
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] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
to my surprise , he walks around the foot of my bed and to the other side , then hops on , lying down over the covers next to me . | [
101,
2000,
2026,
4474,
1010,
2002,
7365,
2105,
1996,
3329,
1997,
2026,
2793,
1998,
2000,
1996,
2060,
2217,
1010,
2059,
6154,
2015,
2006,
1010,
4688,
2091,
2058,
1996,
4472,
2279,
2000,
2033,
1012,
102
] | [
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] | [
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1,
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1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` i 'm sorry , '' he whispers , laying his hands over his stomach . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
1045,
1005,
1049,
3374,
1010,
1005,
1005,
2002,
11054,
1010,
10201,
2010,
2398,
2058,
2010,
4308,
1012,
102
] | [
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] | [
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1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` you do n't have to apologize . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2017,
2079,
1050,
1005,
1056,
2031,
2000,
12134,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
you were just being honest . '' | [
101,
2017,
2020,
2074,
2108,
7481,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` no , i think i do . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2053,
1010,
1045,
2228,
1045,
2079,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
and i 'll stop interfering with you and other guys . '' | [
101,
1998,
1045,
1005,
2222,
2644,
24324,
2007,
2017,
1998,
2060,
4364,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
i clear my throat to keep the pain down . | [
101,
1045,
3154,
2026,
3759,
2000,
2562,
1996,
3255,
2091,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` good . '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2204,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` i do n't really have female friends ... '' he says . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
1045,
2079,
1050,
1005,
1056,
2428,
2031,
2931,
2814,
1012,
1012,
1012,
1005,
1005,
2002,
2758,
1012,
102
] | [
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] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` dana ? '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
11271,
1029,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` dana and i are , well , fuck buddies , mostly . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
11271,
1998,
1045,
2024,
1010,
2092,
1010,
6616,
24115,
1010,
3262,
1012,
102
] | [
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0,
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0,
0,
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0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
and that 's what she wants , too , so it 's ok. '' `` mmm . '' | [
101,
1998,
2008,
1005,
1055,
2054,
2016,
4122,
1010,
2205,
1010,
2061,
2009,
1005,
1055,
7929,
1012,
1005,
1005,
1036,
1036,
25391,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
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0,
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0,
0,
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0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` but i 'd ... i 'd like us to be friends . '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2021,
1045,
1005,
1040,
1012,
1012,
1012,
1045,
1005,
1040,
2066,
2149,
2000,
2022,
2814,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
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0,
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0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` we 're already step-siblings , '' i point out . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2057,
1005,
2128,
2525,
3357,
1011,
9504,
1010,
1005,
1005,
1045,
2391,
2041,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
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0,
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0,
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0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
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0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
i can hear him smile next to me . | [
101,
1045,
2064,
2963,
2032,
2868,
2279,
2000,
2033,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` true . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2995,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
but that was n't by choice . '' | [
101,
2021,
2008,
2001,
1050,
1005,
1056,
2011,
3601,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
he pauses . | [
101,
2002,
19623,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` i like you . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
1045,
2066,
2017,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
i ca n't deny that i 'm attracted to you , of course , but i 'm just not the relationship kind of guy . | [
101,
1045,
6187,
1050,
1005,
1056,
9772,
2008,
1045,
1005,
1049,
6296,
2000,
2017,
1010,
1997,
2607,
1010,
2021,
1045,
1005,
1049,
2074,
2025,
1996,
3276,
2785,
1997,
3124,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
not to mention the kind of issues that dating my own stepsister would bring up . '' | [
101,
2025,
2000,
5254,
1996,
2785,
1997,
3314,
2008,
5306,
2026,
2219,
4084,
12911,
2052,
3288,
2039,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
he sighs . | [
101,
2002,
19906,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` so can we be friends ? '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2061,
2064,
2057,
2022,
2814,
1029,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
i consider for a moment . | [
101,
1045,
5136,
2005,
1037,
2617,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
if i 'm nate 's only female friend , then i really am different to him . | [
101,
2065,
1045,
1005,
1049,
8253,
1005,
1055,
2069,
2931,
2767,
1010,
2059,
1045,
2428,
2572,
2367,
2000,
2032,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
maybe not in the way i 'd most like , but still , it 's something . | [
101,
2672,
2025,
1999,
1996,
2126,
1045,
1005,
1040,
2087,
2066,
1010,
2021,
2145,
1010,
2009,
1005,
1055,
2242,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
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0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` ok. friends , then . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
7929,
1012,
2814,
1010,
2059,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
wait , actually , '' i turn onto my side and face him . | [
101,
3524,
1010,
2941,
1010,
1005,
1005,
1045,
2735,
3031,
2026,
2217,
1998,
2227,
2032,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` before we 're officially friends , i have to ask you some non-friend questions . '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2077,
2057,
1005,
2128,
3985,
2814,
1010,
1045,
2031,
2000,
3198,
2017,
2070,
2512,
1011,
2767,
3980,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` ok ... '' he replies warily , turning on his side , too . | [
101,
1036,
1036,
7929,
1012,
1012,
1012,
1005,
1005,
2002,
14054,
23625,
1010,
3810,
2006,
2010,
2217,
1010,
2205,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
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0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` was i ... am i ... ok at all that stuff ? | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2001,
1045,
1012,
1012,
1012,
2572,
1045,
1012,
1012,
1012,
7929,
2012,
2035,
2008,
4933,
1029,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
you know ... '' he laughs . | [
101,
2017,
2113,
1012,
1012,
1012,
1005,
1005,
2002,
11680,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` what we just did , you mean ? | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2054,
2057,
2074,
2106,
1010,
2017,
2812,
1029,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
yes . | [
101,
2748,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
you are more than ok at it . '' | [
101,
2017,
2024,
2062,
2084,
7929,
2012,
2009,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
i smile . | [
101,
1045,
2868,
1012,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` when did you lose your virginity ? '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2043,
2106,
2017,
4558,
2115,
26970,
1029,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |
`` when i was fourteen . '' | [
101,
1036,
1036,
2043,
1045,
2001,
7426,
1012,
1005,
1005,
102
] | [
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0,
0
] | [
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1,
1
] |